#i say this with love! i love both characters and their tragedy.

[dinarosie]

Unfair Comparisons (part 3)

Here are descriptions of two boys from HP books. It’s hard to believe, but Harry Potter fans claim that boy number one had a very tragic and difficult childhood, suffering abuse, violence, and neglect from his family. These hardships caused him to experience a tough and insecure adolescence, eventually leading him to join the Death Eaters under pressure. On the other hand, fans claim the boy number two is a racist and a professional killer, who in his youth tried to join the Death Eaters in order to freely torment Muggles with dark magic.

1- Regulus Black:

Beneath this was a collection of yellow newspaper cuttings, all stuck together to make a ragged collage. Hermione crossed the room to examine them. ‘They’re all about Voldemort,’ she said. ‘Regulus seems to have been a fan for a few years before he joined the Death Eaters ...“

He was younger than me, said Sirius, ‘and a much better son, as I was constantly reminded.’ ‘But he died,’ said Harry. ‘Yeah,’ said Sirius. ‘Stupid idiot … he joined the Death Eaters.“

2- Severus snape:

Suddenly Harry’s mind was teeming with memories that were not his — a hook-nosed man was shouting at a cowering woman, while a small dark-haired boy cried in a corner. …

Two girls were swinging backward and forward, and a skinny boy was watching them from behind a clump of bushes. His black hair was overlong and his clothes were so mismatched that it looked deliberate: too short jeans, a shabby, overlarge coat that might have belonged to a grown man, an odd smocklike shirt.

"Oh yes, they’re arguing", said Snape. He picked up a fistful of leaves and began tearing them apart, apparently unaware of what he was doing. "But it won’t be that long and I’ll be gone". "Doesn’t your dad like magic?" "He doesn’t like anything, much", said Snape. 

One of the boys sharing the compartment, who had shown no interest at all in Lily or Snape until that point, looked around at the word, and Harry, whose attention had been focused entirely on the two beside the window, saw his father: slight, black-haired like Snape, but with that indefinable air of having been well-cared-for, even adored, that Snape so conspicuously lacked.

J.K. Rowling: Well, that is Snape's tragedy. Given his time over again he would not have become a Death Eater, but like many insecure, vulnerable people (like Wormtail) he craved membership of something big and powerful, something impressive.

I love both Regulus and Severus, and I believe they were both brave boys who made mistakes and tried to make up for them by risking their lives. But there’s something in the fanbase that bothers me regarding these two characters. It’s that Snape’s story is erased from him and given to Regulus Black. I haven't found any evidence of Regulus being tortured or forced to join the Death Eaters, as described in the books. He willingly joined Voldemort because he was fan of voldemort. Moreover, according to Sirius, Regulus was well-liked within his family, and his parents not only didn’t mistreat him, but they actually loved him more than Sirius.

I’m tired of constantly seeing people say that Regulus was a saint while Snape was a sadistic murderer. I can’t believe people can read these lines from the books and still claim that Regulus was tortured with the Cruciatus Curse and abused by his family in childhood, which forced him to join the Death Eaters due to his traumatic upbringing. But Snape? Oh, apparently, he was born to be a racist, torturer, sadist, and murderer from day one.

Aren’t you tired of these ridiculous double standards? Aren’t you fed up with constantly insisting that fanfictions and TikTok videos are canon?

[annab99awritersdream]

So...today I answered an ask about my dream fic plot and I say that it would villain redemption story. While that is true, I am aware that I can't write it myself. I lack the experience to actually write it well and giving any villain a redemption arc kind of means that the story has a happy ending...? If you know me even just a little bit, you'll probably guess it's not really my cup of tea. I'm a sucker for angst and tragedy and that's what I feel most comfortable writing. Which is why I decided I will indeed attempt to write a villain story, but it will be more of a character study. The main character will be a fallen Maia named Moyeldë (one of the many OCs that will appear in my main WIP The Lady of Ithilien and additional one-shots/snippets related to it) who is basically Sauron's main love interest (or so she thinks) in the Fourth Age. Our little fiery Maia comes back and does some stuff, but that will be addressed in LOI.

This new project is about Moyeldë (her name was given to her by Morgoth when she followed him in the aftermath of his rebellion against Eru and it is Quenya for "slave-daughter"=> I combined Mól=slave and Yeldë=daughter).

She's always been in love with Mairon and had a major rivalry with Thuringwethil as the both of them wanted to be his one true love. It is my headcanon that Mairon had a whole Harem in Angband and enslaved Elf-maidens as well as Maiarin women fought one another all the time to be THE ONE FAVORITE. Since it is unclear how Thuringwethil died, it is my headcanon that it was Moyeldë who finished her with Mairon's full support and approval. (Huan only wounded her).

Moyeldë will be eventually killed by Eonwë in LOI, but this new fic will explore her whole life (or maybe just parts of it) and her descent into madness and her delusions as she becomes more and more ruthless. It's a character study basically.

Fancast for Moyeldë is Meryem Uzerli, specifically her role as Hürrem Sultan in the show Muhteşem Yüzyıl (Magnificent Century). She has a slightly unhinged, psycho quality to her that I think fits Moyeldë perfectly.

Crowns and jewels all made by Mairon himself of course.

Here is a little edit of the evil power couple by yours truly.

She doesn't need to know he doesn't give a flying f about her. She is just a concubine to him, a slave who happens to be more useful to him than others.

She's literally admiring him and he's clearly about to scold her. That's their usual dynamic.

Let me know what you think! Does it sound like something you'd like to read? (I will probably write it anyway, but I would like to hear your opinion ☺️)

Thanks!

[mswyrr]

[pix-writes]

"Ford is grateful for your patience and willingness to be involved in his life, especially as he knows he wasn't good at opening up to you when you were starting to become friends let alone a relationship." This is from Stanford HC, and I find it very interesting! How would he act at the beginning of the relationship? What does it take for him to become friends with someone, and that evolves into romance?

My thinking behind this part of my HCs is what Ford has been like through the series, he is shown throughout multiple media in the GF series, that he has continually pushed people away as part of his wound of feeling isolated due to his intellect and polydactly. Through this wound he's actually developed over the course of the series and his time in the portal a lone genius hero archetype that he wants to fit into, to compensate for the hurt he has continually felt from others and being an 'outsider'. (I could go into this in more depth about where this comes from in his childhood and how it affects his outlook when he comes across bill/building the portal, honeslty, but this is the jist of what I want to get across).

(rest under cut)

It's only really once we get to weirdmageddon and post-oddpocalypse, that Ford's arc comes full-circle into healing this wound for good --> as we know Ford has a fair few people in his life who love/care for him, in the past (Bill era) he was unable to see it, but once he exits the portal he begins to care for the twins and value them (and stan, even though he doesn't show it); this makes him take a similar route in trying to defeat Bill still largely on his own, because he doesn't want the people he loves to be in danger and blames himself for Bill's hold on their dimension, thus Ford thinks it's his problem to deal with --> Once they start working together to defeat Bill is the turning point for him to realise that he was wrong and that in order to defeat Bill, you have to work together. [I think he even says that he realises he was foolish for thinking he had to go it alone and that there are people who love him that he can share the buren with, I think in Journal 3 or TBOB (can't remember which rn).] I would argue that it's not until Stanley's great sacrifice in order to save the kids/the world, after screwing up the circle magic thingy, that reality hits him like a ton of bricks and he starts being more open and quickly starts to heal his biggest character wound.

So, considering this in a potential relationship, I think Ford, is generally closed-off, which hasn't helped him in the romance department in his life in the past! Whilst I can see the judgement of others and his outsider status socially would impact this as well, being closed-off and individualistic means that when he does come across someone who would be a good prospective partner, he just... assumes they'd not be interested or overlooks them because he's doing something important and isn't thinking of romance in the moment, so if the other person flirts with him he's not good on picking it up. [I'm finding this all terribly relatable!]

With the insecurity from his wound on top of this, it doesn't make for a good mix, Fiddleford, for example, was not only an assistant but quite a great friend to Ford that he didn't appreciate at the time and due to the added influence of Bill wanting to isolate him from people, Fiddleford ended up having his attempts of deeper connection being thrown back in his face! Whilst a lot of this was unintentionally done on Ford's part, he did tell him when he left that he "didn't need anyone". In the past at Backupsmore Uni, he says that there's not a lot of people he finds 'smart enough' to be on his level to be friends with - which is textbook classic defensiveness to reverse that 'no-one understands me' mentality into something that props up his ego instead. Pushing people away means that he won't have to face the rejection he continually experienced in his childhood, but it means he's potentially pushed away people who could like him as well!

So, I think that in the beginning of a budding friendship/potential relationship, Ford would not be the best at connection or communicating his feelings openly, he'd likely step on other people's toes (metaphorically) in social situations, without realising or meaning to offend someone.

That said, I think it'd be easy for him to become interested in someone who is clearly talented and intelligent, someone who similarly values higher education yet also has a similar love for that which doesn't fit the norm/is bizarre. Perhaps someone who is also deemed a societal 'outsider'. He's been feeling lonely for so long that if you're persistent and kind and can get him to talk on the subjects he loves, he'll start to see you as a friend. I think that being kind and thoughtful with gestures (acts of service) and gifts either to him or his grand-niece/nephew are other things that will make you stand out from the crowd, too, for him to see you as a genuine good person and friend.

However, he will struggle to open up and to let out his natural self (nerdy, passionate, dedicated, 'weird'), so it will take a while to deeply connect to Ford if you're friends, and even longer for him to realise you're interested in him romantically and to act on it.

I think in that stage of 'good friends that are attracted to each other', he would have fallen for you fast; but at the same time he doesn't trust that you are romantically interested in him, even if you have said that you are, part of his mind tells him that it's a trick, a joke. You might think you want to be with him, but you'll leave him soon enough when you realise he's so inexperienced in romance/relationships etc, etc. I think a lot of his old wounded mentality would surface and he's try to push you away, if you get together post-weirdmageddon, or would just shoot you down intentionally/unintentionally if you get together beforehand. Furthermore, he has been a 'loner' for most of his life, particularly after 30 years in the portal, so it's difficult at first in a relationship to share the more mundane things, since he's used to being on his own.

Ford would overthink things to the point of anxiety at the very beginning of a relationship and make it more awkward than if he just relaxed! ^^' He's a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to planning dates, too (reminds me of dipper with the list lol), though it's sweet, cause he cares so much to make it good for you! Once it goes wrong a couple times, you'll both find the humour in it and he'll realise he's being foolish again and relax a little. You'll have to give him reassurance and go at his slow pace in the start of a relationship and he'll find some confidence, probably quicker than either of you anticipated too! He's liked you for a long time by the time you get together, so whether he intends to or not his passionate nature leaks through ;)

[louisianna]

I could write an entire essay (and perhaps one day I will) on how 'Furiosa' is Gothic fiction, a Gothic romance in particular, but I just need to talk about one key aspect of the relationship between Furiosa and Jack for a minute. A lot of discussion surrounding them has been about the nature of their relationship. Most people seem to love the ambiguity, myself included, and I think looking at it through a Gothic romance lens can help us understand why it works so well.

Most Gothic romances feature a heroine who is trapped inside a literal and/or figurative domestic space by a domineering man, typically a father or husband. Poor Furiosa gets both. Dementus imprisons her in the role of daughter. Immortan Joe imprisons her in the role of wife. These are restrictive domestic roles which have been forced upon her and which she cannot freely walk away from. Gothic romance is at its best when it is exposing and critiquing the cruelty of a patriarchal society and the unfair limitations it places upon women.

Furiosa evades attention by disguising herself as a boy. When Jack realises she is actually a woman, and that she is determined to leave the Wasteland, he immediately offers to help her get to wherever she needs to go. No questions asked. And what does Jack expect in return? Absolutely nothing. The trope of a good man, with experience, skill, and social standing, selflessly assisting the heroine, is quite common in Gothic romance.

Jack's words to Furiosa are never paternalistic. They speak to one another as equals. Dementus wanted to shape Furiosa in his own image, but Jack only wants to pass on what he knows. He doesn't want her to stay his protégé or sidekick. He wants her to be able to take care of herself. Until she asks him to come with her, he has every intention of letting her go her own way, leaving him behind.

Jack never comments on Furiosa's appearance. They dress as equals. Immortan Joe put Furiosa in delicate fabrics and planned to use her body for his own selfish desires, but Jack only ever touches Furiosa for her own sake. He doesn't want to possess her. He wants to protect her. He cleans and stitches up her wounds. He will place a comforting hand on her shoulder, only for as long as it takes for her to relax beneath his touch.

It's important to remember that this is a thematic tale being told to us by a History Man, a framing device which is extremely befitting of the Gothic genre. Within this legend, Jack and Furiosa's disregard for clearly defined domestic roles draws a stark contrast to the priorities of Dementus and Immortan Joe. It serves to highlight that their dynamic is free from patriarchal dominance. Whether their relationship is sexual or platonic, romantic or familial, is irrelevent. What matters is that their relationship is based upon genuine concern, deep respect, and unwavering trust. This is the lesson of their story, and it is a lesson for all to the hear. Jack does not merely represent a good father or a good husband or a good mentor. He represents it all. His character is fluid and multi-dimensional. His relationship with Furiosa is ever-shifting and all-encompassing. This allows him to be a role model to all men. But I digress from talking about Gothic fiction!

True domestic happiness for the Gothic romance heroine is only possible once she finds a companion who treats her as a peer; a social equal who gives her the freedom to choose and define the role she wishes to have in his life. It also requires finding or creating a refuge in which the heroine is safe from male power and violence. Furiosa found a more than worthy partner in Jack. Unfortunately, they didn't succeed in reaching freedom together.

Perhaps, in a less Gothic setting than the Wasteland, putting a name to what they were wouldn't have mattered so much. As it was, "my Jack" and "my Fury" was enough.

[waitineedaname]

Yo, friendo What's the best way to consume these funny doomed men I keep seeing?

( Didn't mean it literality, but I can't help but think that the answer is with spice )

depends on which ones!! there are two series I've been posting about a lot, both by the same author: SVSSS and MDZS!

Scum Villain's Self-Saving System/SVSSS is a book series, and you can read it physically (which I did through my local library for the first two books) or online on the Internet Archive or Anna's Archive (which I did for the last two books when I got too impatient to wait on my holds). It also has a ten episode long donghua called Scumbag System that covers most of the first book and it's terrible (affectionate). You can find that one on youtube or most anime pirating sites. In short summary, SVSSS is about a terminally online dude getting isekai'd into the villain of a webnovel he absolutely hates, and in his attempt to avoid the villain's horrible death he sends the story completely off the rails. It's unhinged, hilarious, and everyone in the series is a complete freak <3 It's only four books long (three of which are the main plot and the fourth is extras)

MDZS/Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation is also a book series by the same author! Similarly, you can check your public library or the Internet Archive and Anna's Archive. It also has a donghua (which I haven't watched) and a wildly successful live action drama called The Untamed (which is how I initially got into the series!). The Untamed is available on Netflix and Youtube and probably other places. It does make some significant changes due to censorship reasons and it is extremely cheesy, but I enjoy it. If you want more classical tragedy, I'd say start with The Untamed, and if you want more gay necromancy shenanigans, I'd say start with the books! In short summary, it's about the life and death and second life of Wei Wuxian as he goes from war hero to widely reviled necromancer, and it's quite fun. The book series is five books long, and The Untamed is 50 episodes long. I have a character guide for that one if you need it because the names do get confusing!

[artheresy]

My dynamic for Dan Feng & Yingxing

Hi hello, I said I would finally post this after long debating over if I show it here first or in my fic first, but fuck it. That’s a long ways away and I need to rant about them because they take up too much space in my brain.

So this post, isn’t me claiming that this is the canon dynamic between Dan Feng and Yingxing or that this is the only right one or whatever. This is purely my own view of what I think their dynamic would be based upon how I see their individual characters with the little bits and crumbs we’ve been given so far in HSR. I can’t go over every single aspect of them here because I just purely can’t think of every single thing so this is primarily going to be talking about the fundamental key parts of my interpretation of their dynamic! If that makes sense, I’ll hop right in

Be warned, this is pretty fucking long, I think so much about them it actually hurts me physically, like it’s painful. This is me just letting my autism run while talking about two of my favorites, so be cautious… sorry in advance if some areas turn into tangents, again I think about them so much its actually too much I think about them too much

AGAIN, THIS IS MY VIEW OF THEM!! Based on the characterization we have so far which isn’t a whole bunch, this is my interpretation of their relationship based on how I view the bits of characterization we have and what we know about them

—

Okay so one of the biggest and most fundamental parts that influences how I view their dynamic and the course of their relationship is looking at how exactly and why exactly I think they became close. Jingliu in her companion quest says:

I think this statement she makes “to see someone so arrogant get along with someone so proud” is actually the foundation of why they get close and their dynamic works rather than an obstacle that they somehow overcome. Specifically, I think that it was Yingxing’s arrogance (partially genuine and partially a habit born for the sake of his own survival) that allowed the two of them to get close. When we see lines from Yingxing via Dan Heng’s memories or via the Mirage Echo, though he uses Dan Feng’s proper title, he seems to talk rather casually to him. Even in a tense situation as secretly being in Scalegorge Waterscape for research would seem, Yingxing still is very lighthearted and in some languages, even laughs a little as he banters with Dan Feng. I have my own headcanons for why he has this casualness to him, but either way it’s a genuine part of him and a part of his canon characterization. I think that casualness, a product of his confidence/arrogance and maybe a little of his obliviousness as well, allows for them to get close. It evens the playing field, Yingxing sees Dan Feng as his equal, as a person, as Dan Feng rather than as his position of Imbibitor Lunae High Elder of the Vidyadhara. I could speculate all day whether or not other people had treated him similarly before and he shot it down (there’s a lot of the actual evolution of the dynamic that I will write I swear), but I think there was something very unique in that casualness that Dan Feng might not have experienced before, not from anyone else, not from the other members of the HCQ he had met before. Perhaps even Yingxing’s background would play a part in how shocked by his behavior DF is. Either way, it is that casualness, that equalness unlike he had ever experienced before, mixed with all of Yingxing’s other characteristics such as his cheeky nature that manages to quickly break down Dan Feng’s walls and make him feel compelled to grow closer to YX. Whether their first meeting was via Baiheng and Jingliu or a chance encounter before they eventually join the HCQ, Dan Feng is coming away from that shell shocked by the sheer audacity of this short life species, feelings he first interprets as offense before he realizes he’s actually amused/interest in him, and Yingxing walking away like “Huh? That was the High Elder I guess. Seems nice, a bit stiff tho!” There is no worship of Dan Feng from his side for any reason, not for his skills, not for his position, not even as an unattainable ethereal beauty situation. He views him as just another person, an equal, and no part of him views DF in this cocky “he’s not unattainable bc I already have him” kind of way because…

—

Another fundamental in my personal interpretation of their relationship is that Yingxing doesn’t truly seek anything from Dan Feng nor does he ever necessarily try to pursue him. And all of this isn’t in an insecure “We’d never work” kind of product of overthinking way of choosing not to pursue him. Rather, it’s primarily because Yingxing doesn’t feel the need to. He doesn’t need his romantic feelinhs to be satisfied or fulfilled especially with the difference in their lifespans. As long as he can be by his side and stay close with him until his time comes to an end, Yingxing is truly perfectly content with that. A lot of this additionally stems from a certain place. That being that after he gets to know Dan Feng better and learns of the sheer pressure he endures due to his position, the choices he feels he’s forced into, the level of restriction, even with all of the influence Dan Feng still has, he doesn’t want to be an added source of pressuring or discomfort. To sum it up, Yingxing leaves the ball in Dan Feng’s court so he can act as he sees fit when he feels like it. There’s an added layer to this also of Yingxing not wanting to ruin the current state of their dynamic (a topic I’ll get into more). In the end, this is just yet another part of Yingxing that utterly pulls Dan Feng in. He is very used to being distrusting of others and refusing to get close to many people, primarily out of wariness of the potential ulterior motives people may have when befriending him. Contrastly, Yingxing doesn’t expect or even want anything from Dan Feng even the closer they get. Dan Feng can see that, and it makes him trust in Yingxing. Makes him trust to the point that he feels comfortable enough to make attempts pursuing Yingxing himself rather than meeting at a stalemate, refusing to go after a man Dan Feng knows won’t chase him as to not risk pressuring him and bc he’s fine with how things are. That isn’t to say though that Yingxing won’t respond to any attempts Dan Feng makes first though, because he absolutely will. Well… that is if he can recognize any attempts from Dan Feng at all because he can be rather oblivious in the face of people making advances at him-

An added part to all of this is that Yingxing with the way he acts, both in general and in this specific regard, ends up being part of what helps influence and encourage Dan Feng to do more to take what he wants, actually follow his desires in certain aspects rather than keeping up his stiff outer image and denying himself of everything for that sake of his position. The HCQ in general all have influence helping Dan Feng open up more like this, seizing things instead of either waiting for things on a platter or never having them. However, Yingxing's bold nature is definitely the strongest factor as he ends up helping Dan Feng learn to identify what he wants for himself. Whether that want is something as complex as moving forward in a relationship when not only has Dan Feng had very little experience with close connections to others, but also is so accustomed to the stillness of long life, or something as simple as taking breaks and time to himself to live and breathe and experience life moving around him. It's through Yingxing (and the rest of the HCQ) that Dan Feng learns to be more selfish. It's through all of their care and kindness and love that Dan Feng learns that he too is not merely a pillar to stand tall for his people. That he is a person with needs and wants, and it is perfectly fine to be selfish and prioritize yourself at times.

—

So that previous section got into a little bit of Dan Feng’s trust in Yingxing, but what about Yingxing’s side of things? What about his trust in Dan Feng? I dunno what it is about him, but I feel like Dan Feng is the kind of person who can hear some of the deepest confessions and see the barest parts of the heart of someone he cares about and not treat them any differently like as if they are fragile y’know. Like Dan Feng is the person who Yingxing, out of all the HCQ, can truly confide in because he knows he won’t be seen different or treated in a drastically different way. Ultimately, Jingliu isn’t someone he feels he can go to for super emotional things which she likely herself knows she wouldn’t be able to help much with, Jing Yuan and him have a very light hearted joking dynamic that makes changing the tone and breaking the mood for a deep heart to heart much harder so he doesn’t often do it, and Baiheng… well, deep down Baiheng still sees Yingxing as that disheartened little boy, who had lost everything and was being told that there’s nothing he could do about it given his lifespan, that he couldn’t avenge what he had lost. If Yingxing were to tell her how he honestly truly feels about everything in his life, the traumas he still hadn’t overcome or the thoughts that plague him every day, he knows she would end up fretting over him, mother hen style. Being overly cautious as if his mind is made of glass, and as much as he loves her, he hates the idea of her changing how she treats him because of just how much she cares for him in turn.

(It’s a trait I see Baiheng having as to it being an obstacle in her other relationships like with Yingxing but works well in her relationship with Jingliu, caring for her and treating her softly, not underestimating her, in a way that others are too afraid to treat the unwavering, ice cold Sword champion! Matching DF and YX’s whole situation with his arrogance and casualness)

In the end, Yingxing feels like Dan Feng is the only one he can truly trust with the deepest corners of his heart and mind without worrying of Dan Feng either judging him or suddenly treating him like a fragile piece of porcelain. Even if he were to take note of something Yingxing told him and do something in response perhaps to ease his worries or heart ache, it would never be something out of pity or thinking Yingxing to be unable to take care of himself. Because ultimately, that’s where this all stems for Yingxing. He has lived so much of his life underestimated, whether having his skills and abilities questioned for being a short life species or sometimes intentionally sometimes unintentionally having his ability to take care of himself questioned like he needs a caretaker. Something that again is partially due to again to being a short life species. What Yingxing likes about Dan Feng is from the moment he met him, he doesn’t feel as if he is being questioned or underestimated. Dan Feng makes him feel as if he is truly seen as an equal, even with their distinct difference in power. It’s a treatment from Dan Feng that serves as a response to Yingxing’s own treatment of Dan Feng, his casualness to the other man making it clear he sees him as an equal as well.

And that? Well that is perhaps the most important part of the dynamic. In canon, they both have struggles with how they are seen and treated by others based on preconceived notions about their status. Dan Feng being in a way dehumanized as he is put up on a pedestal for being an incarnation of Imbibitor Lunae, for being the High Elder of the Vidyadhara, a position that he wants to escape because of the sheer loss of identity just a role brings. Yingxing being underestimated from the moment he stepped onto the Xianzhou because he wasn’t a long life species to the point that the other celestial masters on the Zhuming borderline bullied him into doubting himself, thinking a lot about his own death, and as a young boy (not even a teen yet), literally saying “Maybe I’ll never live to see the day my parents are avenged.” In my view of them, for them to truly be as close as they are established in canon, I think that from the start of their dynamic they make it very clear they see the other as a genuine and true equal in a way that other people haven’t or perhaps, can’t fully.

—

I said this before my in Aurizzm Yingxing post, but yeah, I don’t think Dan Feng or Yingxing would have come into a romantic relationship with each other with any experience at all. I know Dan Feng with no experience is a very accepted idea, and I agree with it very much given his isolated position and his proud attitude and that 100% plays into my view of their dynamic. I also however, firmly believe Yingxing came in without any romantic relationship experience too. The difference here ends up being in how inexperienced each of them are. Yingxing has had a lot more friendship experience, and he’s experienced crushes before which is how he can identify his own romantic feelings better than Dan Feng. But he’s never actually been in any relationship. He’s never had the time, he’s got his own goals in mind while being painfully aware he’s on a time limit, and let’s be real like I said before, This Man is married to his Forge. Meanwhile, Dan Feng truly hasn’t had any friendships prior to the HCQ. Knowing him and her too, I firmly believe Dan Feng and Jingliu’s relationship for example, was for maybe a few decades, maybe a literal century, just them sparring without words from time to time. So Dan Feng not only going in with no friendship experience, but I think that man also is having to recognize some new emotions and feelings he’s never experienced nor can put words to. So Dan Feng’s disaster comes in being painful aware of the presence and intensity of his own feelings… he just doesn’t have the words nor experience to recognize exactly what those feelings are. It’s an absolute disaster on all fronts, somebody pray for the HCQ who unfortunately have to experience all of this.

There’s an added layer I want to go more into looking back at the first part of why their relationship works and the thing I said about the Baiheng trait. As we saw with Jingliu admitting to her feelings towards his attitude as a child, she wasn’t… she wasn’t really a fan so to say of his arrogance. And given y’know, what we see of the people of the Luofu, I don’t doubt many people have similar reactions. Part of Yingxing’s limited experience comes not only from his own decision to not pursue anything, I think part of it comes from being for whatever reason feeling distaste for him. Whether it’s their own prejudices against Outworlders, or his bold attitude and lack of formality that makes any interest they had in him end up flying away. Which ugh, makes it even more special that this attitude of his, born out of necessity for his own survival on the Xianzhou and for his ability to move forward in his craftsmanship after all he went through, which has pushed so many people away, ends up being the exact thing that allows him to get close to Dan Feng. IT’s UGGGHHH Sorry, but I just need to scream. I NEED TO SCREAM ABOUT THEM OKAY?? THEY TAKE UP TOO MUCH SPACE IN MY BRAIN, I CAN’T HAVE A SINGLE MOMENT OF REST BECAUSE OF THEM

—

Again, this is my view of them and their dynamic based upon what we have been given in game so far, the crumbs of characterization we have. God I hope we get more. This isn’t me saying this view of them is canon or anything, this is just how I view them. This is the dynamic and thoughts that have grown like mold in my head from thinking about them WAY too much.

I have so much more I could talk about, certain specific things or things that don’t even immediately come to mind right now. If you want to ask more about how I view them or have some topic or aspect of them in mind, please hit me up. Either send something to my inbox or bust your way into my dms to talk about them. I love them so much. They mean the world to me.

And honestly? I could just make two whole separate posts also just about how I specifically characterize each of them, but I think I need to let my brain rest a bit.

And don’t think about this dynamic specifically in reference to how it could reflect on their current selves because you might just end up hurting yourself like I have. GOD I HATE THEM

[delimeful]

I thought I'd read most of your stuff, but I just discovered yesterday that I hadn't read Down That Desolate Road yet, so I did and it's sooooooo good! I love it, just like the other stories of yours I've read! You're a wonderful writer! And I love reading and re-reading your stuff. It's amazing. Thank you!

i'm so glad you enjoyed it! :D DTDR is angstier than my usual fare but i have a lot of fun with it, and i love when people give it a chance. tysm, i hope it continues to entertain!

[pegasusdrawnchariots]

anyone else losing sleep over the fact that Cyrano spoke abt willingly sacrificing the chance of ever being happy someday, as long as he knew it would ensure the happiness of someone he loves, to both Roxane & Christian separately — & then had it ripped from him anyway before he was able to make that sacrifice, without ensuring a thing? yeah me neither

[anaer]

i really do hate jjk

[laufire]

forever in limbo between batfamily-embracers and batfamily-deniers, veering more towards one or the other depending on what I'm reading at a given moment. yes, I firmly believe some of the bonds within it are undeniably ~familial. those can't be as easily handwaved just because they're toxic bonds, iykwim. but also, they do have peak "ma'am this is not a found family, this is a CULT" vibes that must be taken into account xD

either way I might be leaning towards, I wouldn't want dc to "burn it all down" because, duh. I love their toxicity and dysfunction. it's why I'm here at all mate.

[the-goat-carnival]

can well-written shows please stop ending on tragedy before a hiatus? i’m literally sitting here with a box of barbecue wings in front of me that i can’t eat because that tragic sulemio breakup has twisted my stomach up in knots.

[johanthefriskiestofbits]

oooooo please tell me (who knows nothing on the subject) about orv swap au

hehehe. hehehehehehe. hehehehehehehhehehehhheheheh <- guy who is so normal

the premise of orv swap au (name has yet to be finalized) is this: what if kdj and yjh swapped narrative positions (reader <-> character) but very little else? what if a video game player enters a time loop to save his favorite character from dying over and over again and also to end the apocalypse?

admittedly it's not super fleshed out yet (a lot of the changes this premise would introduce are still not hammered out yet) but here are some points under the cut (novel spoilers ahead!)

orv swap au starts with pro gamer yjh who feels :/ abt his job, but hey, it pays the bills. despite (or maybe because of) his relative popularity as a pro gamer and networking with the agency/sponsors/people to impress, he's kind of isolated in a way that's detrimental, a facade of someone he's not whenever he's on camera

something to play around with is the idea of agency? maybe this yjh doesn't feel like he has any and has his hands tied between the lifestyle and being under public scrutiny and not having enough of a support system to leave everything behind. maybe he doesn't know what else he would even do. maybe he's aimless and drifting with nothing to hold on to.

his favorite video game is what i've been thinking of as World's Hardest To Play Indie Game (not based on difficulty but just on the experience of consuming it) a boring, exposition heavy, player-hostile, poorly designed, slightly buggy mess of a barely-playable game: twsa, a game that was not finished upon release and experiences with sporadic updates every now and then.

the ending tree to this game is so convoluted its insane. also theres no save states so if you die (very likely) u restart babeyyy.

twsa (video game) does have multiple endings, all of which happen when kdj, your main character, dies. some are farther into the apocolypse than others, some paths require meta knowledge of future events or character actions or items or whatever. the "true ending" is either analogous to the original 1863: kdj makes it to the end at the cost of everyone he loves, or hsy's modified 1863: kdj makes himself enemy of the scenario to secure a way out for the kimcom remnants.

there's branches on the choices tree where everyone dies and everything sucks and is bad forever and theres choices to make where kdj gets to make a family and they don't really get to settle down but they can get pretty close to it among the ruins of the apocalypse. through all his testing, yjh finds that these endings are nice but peter out - to get to the end of the apocalypse yjh has to claw his way there inch by painful inch, through betrayal and sacrifice, and he still cant fully get past it

i originally wanted to finagle a yoohankim 3 way swap but i couldn't figure it out. swap aus are a lot easier to work with when they're even numbers, at least to me, so this au features a ysa who is a video game company employee by day and by night she really has become god this time (and also a terrible indie dev). and this is how jungdoksang can still win !!!!

also yjh's coworker from Real Life hsy :) i haven't decided if she's like an employee for the same agency, or if she's someone else in the gaming circles that yjh interacts with sometimes (in my heart theyre in like some sort of discord server together), or something like that but she's around. whatever she does she is twitter cancelled for something. to me.

the only other character swaps are lsk and yma. yma is yjh's estranged sister (in broad strokes there's a vague bad parent situation going on here) (they used to be close until they drifted apart and slowly started hating each other [there is an abyss between them that neither of them can bridge]) (he feels that she betrayed him and threw him under the bus so he left [maybe he gets kicked out]) (she feels that he abandoned her to whatever situation they have going on [he didn't even try to take her with him]) and he has to find her when the apocalypse starts. yjh older sibling to yma gives us a whole different little dynamic to explore from kdj ysk (there's different levels of responsibility and guilt and blame when you're talking siblings that are soooooo interesting to me. sorry that i see any set of siblings and immediately try to figure out how to make them worse)

lsk is kdj's mom who appeared into existence at some point with kdj and they were both just adults. that's weird isn't it. oh well. i guess she can become a transcendent later too for funsies

everyone else stays in the same configuration of Real Person vs Character to me this is a very important aspect

this point has no precedent with the swap, nothing particular that would change to cause this, but it would be so funny if lgy was a little gamer boy who is an avid yjh hater. hates that guy. shows up to competitions to boo him. tunes into yjh's silent no-mic speedrunning streams to mald in chat but yjh +mods don't ban him bc its kinda funny.

anyways the apocalypse starts when yjh and his coworker/fellow gamer hsy are on a train to twitchcon and lgy is also there (also headed to twitchcon) and he brings bugs because he likes them but also to sabotage yjh specifically. its just funny if this happened. you understand

instead of having reader-related skills and abilities, yjh's skills are video game player based! he gets flavor text insight on people, location, and items, things like that. notably, he has the ability to reset, to bring himself back to the beginning of the apocalypse

orv swap proper follows yjh as the Player of the Game (Consumer of the Narrative) who lives hundred of lifetimes in this ruined-world-become-reality "replaying" [read: time looping through] the game to reshape it to save his fave character from self implosion (kdj with no dissociation is very prone to dying. all the time.). to revisit the idea of playing with yjh and the idea of agency, of creation, the only way to get past the apocalypse is to go off the beaten path, to choose options that weren't even there in the game. when in space, at his darkest point, yjh becomes a writer. in this story, at his darkest point, he has to become a creator too

please do not ask me how the epilogues go i dont know how the epilogues go (i don't want to throw yjh back into a train for milennia after he Just went through a thousand resets so i'm sending kdj for that but i havent fully planned how or why)

anyways, hope that helps!!! :)

[classicslesbianopinions]

i love how every time i see the antigone poll on my dash antigone is steadily getting more and more votes/percentage youre doing good work here

no the most gratifying moment of my entire life was checking the post every few minutes and seeing the number tick up i won't lie... and like i literally am so tired of tumblr brackets and i don't think they matter and i think they say way more about which subsets of people 1. are active on tumblr and 2. are following the specific bracket blog but also like... i literally cannot watch my βλωρβη (greek woman blorbo) lose a most tragic poll to a character who's not even dead.*

*captain jack is exempt from the "must be dead" clause because being alive forever is also tragic because it's all about how your time isn't working right/doesn't sync up with other people's <- thing i just made up but i stand by it <- also thing i can try and elaborate on later when the next door neighbors aren't vibrating my skull into oblivion with their sound system

[xoshepard]

"say my name" "you're goddamn right" is a scene that would be so cool if i didn't fucking hate walter's guts sooooo much sdkljfhsdjkfhsjk

[whalesfall]

always really interesting to me when i see posts interpreting Louis as kind in some manner, when he’s much closer to what I would call… hm, not nice, maybe passive? friendly to most. charming when he needs to be. but not necessarily kind. a surface level kindness immediately interrupted by his unending (fascinating!) hypocrisy. he’s ATTEMPTING kindness? but kindness, to me, implies someone is genuinely and staunchly kind in their actions, if not always in their words. it was not kind, really, to save Claudia—though maybe it felt like a mercy in the moment, but by then Louis still resented vampirism to some extent, knowing he would be trapping her in that too. it was not kind to insist on killing Lestat’s lover, (even though it makes sense why!) if you have some sort of general fondness and care for life and resent taking lives as a rule. he makes it clear his whole life as a human was difficult, and kindness didn’t necessarily suit him, was forced to be harder and more charming to get by. like, yes, he doesn’t enjoy wanton violence usually, but when it suits him or when he’s reached a breaking point, he barely even flinches from it and doesn’t even really display remorse (a little bit of remorse, but it’s—removed, not lingered on. he lingers on other guilts more.) it’s more than anything to me a fascinating brand of understandable hypocrisy (and maybe a bit of a brand of cowardice) that makes him both generally reluctant to take a life but having So Many Exceptions to that rule; not to mention how often I think he’s distorted the story to some degree and how armand has influenced that, “let the tale seduce you,” giving everyone involved both more grace to their actions but also more uncertainty and questions about how truthful the recollection is. I don’t know, I think he’s neat!! I think his distortions are neat!! is he kind? maybe not. but he is attempting kindness, or maybe just reduction of harm, which matters too.