#i said this at the start but any critiques here are tied directly to stuff I really really LIKE about this campaign!

[maliro-t]

This is something I wrote a long time ago now, but I saw a post the other day that reminded me of it, so I wanted to add a couple of things with the context of c3.

A lot of people are frustrated with the divinity debate central to c3, myself included, but, while I'm going to be slightly punchy at the start here I promise this isn't just a long rant or critique; I'm genuinely interested in a lot of things going on narratively, and this is my attempt to reconcile those with a reoccurring central question that I find kind of lackluster.

So, Bell's Hells keep going round and round about whether the gods' existence inherently infringes upon the free will of the people, right? Which Ludinus would of course argue that it does. But like, given the way the world textually works, is this worth arguing about? This ongoing conflict is about whether the hierarchy created by the discrepancy of power between mortals and gods is an imposed and oppressive social class difference or a harmless (if occasionally dangerous) ecological one.

And frankly, I agree that it's basically just ecological. The first part of this post is proof enough of my position, and its one I took long before we got this deep into c3. But really, the fact that we've spent so much time trying to take the other side seriously, especially given their conduct, has been a bit tiring! I totally get the frustration lol, I got sick of the argument a year ago, largely because the characters never really seem to change their positions, and they never agree so it keeps coming back up as if this, their 20th time discussing it, will be the time they resolve it even though they're obviously all gonna try to stop Ludinus regardless.

Especially after Downfall, I really have been kind of rolling my eyes that our cast of main characters don't seem to be meaningfully impacted by that story very much, in terms of actually changing their perspectives. I think in the harshest terms it feels like they're kind of being flanderized, because this debate has been going on so long everyone kind of is going, 'Well, this is what this character believes. Time to perform it!' This was worse for me with some characters than others, and idk I don't actually want to spend that much time knocking RP decisions, but generally yeah, I was frustrated! Especially because Downfall was just really goddamn moving for me! And it's not even real history for me so why the heck was I changed more by it than people who exist in world?! Idk man!

But I don't think this campaign is doing nothing interesting with divinity, and I don't think the text is really contradicting past entries by being more skeptical of the gods either. I think Downfall really put some general concerns about that at ease for me because of what a clear and nuanced and empathetic examination of divinity it was- one that felt both consistent with past lore and really revelatory. So yeah, like the central question that the players are hung up on is one that I don't really care for that much, and it will resolve how it resolves, but I'm still along for the ride.

To look again at Vax & RQ's relationship, I think it's clear how strongly I feel the text illustrates a symbiotic relationship between them, not a controlling one- and specifically one that relies on the explicit free will of the mortal. But what is SUPER interesting to me is how people actually view that relationship in world, especially in the end. I've talked about this before because it's one of my favorite things in the whole three campaign saga, but the greatest tragedy of Vax's fate to me is that Vox Machina unequivocally blames the Raven Queen for it.

It's Vax very tentatively saying, without details, that he's back because the Raven Queen allowed him to be and Vex smiling relieved, saying "She's my new favorite."

It's Vax, without giving details, implying that he'll die when the task is complete, and Vex saying "She's not my favorite anymore."

It's "it's not fair," and "I do not accept this," and "I feel like she's taking part of me away," and "Fuck that raven bitch!" and "I feel like we should destroy [her temple]," and "I wanted to hurt her for hurting me."

It's Vax never quite saying out loud that he wanted this. That it was a gift she gave him in his desperation, and one he gave back to her in her loneliness. It doesn't matter to all of them that Vax died days before she came for him in the end, that he was disintegrated by the very evil they all dedicated themselves to overthrowing, that he was only there at all by her grace, that the circumstances of that are something he chose. It only matters that she was in front of them to be blamed for the unfairness of the world. And the Raven Queen takes their hatred without protest- she doesn't even really try to justify herself, because whether or not they understand or approve or forgive doesn't matter to her. "This is not for you," she says. She has always been feared without the attempt to understand. She has always been blamed in anger by people who will never know her, because no one could ever know her, and the people who did once forgot her name and then died excruciating deaths in a war over a mantle she inherited.

It's her priestesses in c3 saying "We are in mourning," and Keyleth, scenes later, saying "I have been angry for 30 years."

I bring all of this up because I see so much of Ludinus' argument as kind of this same question of "fairness" that Vox Machina broaches, with the difference being that they are not obsessed enough with that anger-or power hungry enough-to decide that the whole system should be destroyed. And because they also rely upon several gods whom they have not forsaken like they did RQ- whose role at least Keyleth has in time come to understand (without divesting herself of her anger, of course).

But it is the nature of these vast, unknowable creatures to be cursed and scorned and forsaken and blamed, especially unfairly.

This is why Dorian brought such a refreshing point of view to the circular Bell's Hells argument to me, even if I don't actually think he's overall right. What's different about Dorian is he's actually bringing personal experience of a really interesting kind to the table! He is someone who, unlike even the victims of the faithful in Issylra, has had several personal experiences with a very particular Divinity which have left him absolutely worse off, even going all the way back to the original EXU (which I'm sure he now looks at knowing Lolth was trying to manipulate him: he says to Orym in Zadash, "[If I'd put that crown on my head], I wouldn't be here right now," even if his instinct is still to make risky deals with divinity he distrusts to protect his people, but that's a whole different post). Dorian watched someone he loves do things she absolutely did not want to do under the sway of a goddess who decided she needed her as her own- that killing the people who might get in the way of her divine influence was the only way to protect herself in a war that the people she was killing-including Dorian- didn't even really know about at that point.

So, it's totally understandable for him to come into this going, 'That was wrong. I was wronged. I want someone to pay for what was taken from me. I don't think anyone should have the power to do that.' What complicates it, however (and I of course won't go so far as to say that I agree with her methods lol), is that the only reason that happened at all is because Lolth was under threat by people trying to exterminate her and her people. But of everyone in the group, Dorian's perspective is closest to that of actual Aeorians, whose bitterness sprung from a world destroyed by a war between beings that seemed to think that 'the entire world' was an acceptable amount of collateral damage.

So, there's this ongoing disconnect between gods who won't explain themselves to mortals who need someone to blame that I find really, really interesting- far more interesting than the question of if gods have too much power, or if the divine gate is really enough to protect mortals from vampiric gods that are leeching off a world that isn't their own in the first place. It's a communication issue, at its core.

I'm not sure if it's something the characters will ever look hard enough at to make it a more obvious central talking point, but textually that's actually what feels like is going on and that's fascinating to me!

Corellon, in episode 107, in the midst of that undeniably beautiful, poignant hour says, "You see, something that I've realized, something that I keep seeing is (laughs) our children continue to rebel, all the time. Hundreds, thousands, many, many years continuous. We are in this perpetual cycle, (laughs) and it seems that our presence, be it either here, behind a big door, isn't doing anything. There is something innate. You want us out. "

And the thing is- he is absolutely right. He doesn't even bring up whether the gods are in the wrong or if they have too much power or if they're using it wrong- it's just completely not about that. What he observes and feels trapped by is that the system as it is set up now- that heirarchy, that power difference, that distance- it causes mortals and gods alike to play a role that they ultimately cannot content themselves with, whether it's unjust or not. The addition of the divine gate, which was intended to protect Exandria, makes things worse! It makes that distance greater! It makes physical (or perhaps metaphysical lol, idk how magic works) that inability to understand the divine. It makes them appear to be hiding, which some of them certainly are- just look at Ioun, for one!

Does that mean that the gods fleeing Exandria would actually be to everyone's (or anyone's) benefit? TBD! But given threads running all the way back to campaign one I certainly understand his instinct to make a change.

To quote Cassida in Downfall:

"Before, in that chamber, I was told there are things I could never understand. I am going to do as you have asked. But I will ask a favor in return. Make up your mind if I am given to understand this world or not."

They cannot understand us. They must understand us to be satisfied with how things are. Both are true. Nothing is solved. It's an impossible gap to close.

And I can't wait to hear what the Raven Queen has to say about it. :)

Because I’ve had all day Raven Queen brain:

Another thing that is really interesting to me is Vax’s relationship to fate, which gets interpreted in a few different ways even in game, and I think it’s pretty complex. I’m thinking about it here slightly…cosmologically, I guess, in terms of how “fate-touched” works in the big picture, although all of that is kind of necessarily in relation to the way it exists for Vax (et al.) personally.

On a meta level, Vox Machina’s story is a literal game of chance, so everything might feel like it’s led up to a particular outcome, but ultimately that’s dependent on the way we make sense of the story once we can see all its parts. 

And I think that’s kind of what Vax is doing himself! In Duskmeadow, after he communes with The Raven Queen, Vax expresses to Keyleth and Pike his newfound faith in his role as champion, something he sees as meant to be (transcript under the cut). He brings up the broom theft and the Umbrasyl battle as things that happened to Vox Machina that don’t make sense, but which are fundamental to their journey, saying “What else is it?” Why else are we still alive? It has to have been for something. It’s a way he can justify his situation to himself, to put aside the fear and trepidation that has been eating him alive for weeks. He believes it’s fate, but in part because he needs to.

And that’s obvious in the way he disbelievingly and emphatically says to Keyleth that this is not a path that he wanted when she implies otherwise. He initiated the deal, but he doesn’t completely understand it, and he didn’t really know how to handle what it meant for a long time–it derailed pretty much all of his plans! But at the same time, he says, “Everything has led to it,” because he needs to believe in that for it to make sense to him.

But that doesn’t really…make it true though, right? It’s no less profound to him for that, but it isn’t the only explanation. The way The Raven Queen defines a “fate-touched” is as someone who bends fate, not just someone who is fated, not just someone who has a destiny. In The Endless Atheneum, she says, “You, Fate-Touched, you are the embodiment of this truth. All mortal life has potential with or without the gods. We offer some paths, but it’s up to you to decide if they are the right ones for you”. Again, a pretty important part of Vax’s relationship with The Raven Queen is that both of the deals that he makes with her involve him as a willing participant, not a pawn. Most significantly, with the first one he makes the offer. He doesn’t know what he’s offering, sure, but he’s the one who reached out. So, it was his choice–his own exertion of agency–that set him on this path. His own bending of fate. And it changed everything!

To return to Duskmeadow, the way Keyleth responds to his pretty definitive declaration faith is fascinating!! She spends a while (before this even) trying to convince him to kind of…mentally separate himself from the reverence that goes with faith and divine inspiration. And I think a lot of that is rooted in her own insecurities around fate and destiny and gods and the universe, so some of what she says feels like a kneejerk reaction to her own fear, but she also is kind of right! I think Keyleth is certainly wrong that Vax wanted this path, whether consciously or unconsciously, but she’s right to point out that he had control. I love that she calls The Raven Queen an opportunist–Matt basically explains as much in the campaign wrap-up when they talk about the deal in the tomb. The Raven Queen absolutely took advantage of Vax’s offer, turning it into something completely other than what he expected, largely for her own benefit. But he still had to be the one to open the door for her to do that. By her definition, “fate-touched” function as a kind of intermediary between the gods and your average mortal, picking which path to follow where individuals on either side of that line can’t fully, which includes her. Another example of this I love is the uncertainty she expresses about his path right after he gets disintegrated. She really doesn’t know what’s going to happen to him, or the rest of Vox Machina! Instead, she can only offer another deal, to give him the tools to navigate the storm. He has to be the one to choose to use them.

(And that’s a side effect of the way the game works of course: the DM offers paths for the story to follow, but the players are the ones to pick where to go)

So, the way The Raven Queen stood to benefit from taking him on as a champion was that she got to be in the room. It gave her a modicum of influence over which path got picked, even if she wasn’t the one personally steering. In that way at least, their relationship really is a “fine partnership”, a framing that Keyleth encourages before the Umbrasyl fight.

The worship angle and the partnership take aren’t mutually exclusive here, and imo kind of help each other along. There is a great deal of faith and reverence between them, which grew beautifully past that initial fear, and I don’t think they would have been much use to each other if Vax hadn’t so fully believed in her. But it wasn’t quite The Raven Queen dictating his fate, or anyone else’s. That much was ultimately up to him.

Keep reading

[smp-live]

Was scrolling through c!Wilbur crit blogs again and it got me thinking about why exactly I argue in favour of him so much so here’s a random ramble (that got long) about it:

Most c!Wilbur critics (at least, in the tag, not directly post-lore stream. The ones that do actual analysis on him) are like... really reasonable about it, actually, lmao. Like it’s mostly just calling him a bad person because of power hunger/manipulation/being a bad dad/whatever else. (Not talking about antis. I mean people who are really critical of him, but recognize that he’s a well-crafted character with nuance.)

Which I agree with! I consider myself an apologist, my writing and analysis leans really sympathetic, and I still agree that he’s a shitty rat bastard that I would run far away from irl. Even at the beginning of the story, he’s very morally grey, sometimes using underhanded persuasion tactics, doing ehh things like stealing, and it only gets worse from there.

But on the other hand, he’s... not that bad. Like I saw one person say about c!Dream, “My reaction to most critique of him is... so what?” and that’s how I feel about c!Wilbur, I suppose. Yeah, he tried to rig an election - but it was a last-ditch effort at not going full dictator, he didn’t follow through, and later on he - in part - decided to blow it up because they couldn’t get it back while being democratic. And yeah, he manipulated people - all in all, it wasn’t really really bad things, mostly to paint himself in a better light because of his insecurities, and people sometimes fall into manipulative language without even outwardly realizing that it’s a shitty thing to do. Of course, that shows a bigger underlying problem in their mindset and the way they interpret relationships and possession, but then that’s a different discussion - and definitely one that applies to c!Wilbur.

(Not saying he doesn’t ever intentionally manipulate people. I think that a. sometimes it might be accidental, (”If you wanna be President you’re gonna have to get on my good side,” mans was Not thinking straight,) and b. other times he falls into old habits/coping mechanisms that happen to be manipulation, (Tommy at Las Nevadas.) Other than the election and maybe some times in the early founding of L’Manberg, I can’t think of any moments where I’m like, “Yeah, he is Purposefully Manipulating here.” And even then, it just doesn’t strike me as a terrible thing. People manipulate, it’s a thing they do. That’s it. A morally grey action.)

And I think the majority of the reason I make more posts painting him in a positive light and don’t really discuss my critique of him is because it feels like the fandom has an overwhelming bias of hatred/crit, even if a lot of that isn’t, y’know, proper analysis of his character. I instinctively want to balance it out for this character I love/relate to, because a lot of what I see straight-up ignores the lighter side of his moral-greyness.

Like, a while back, I posted a couple clips from late-election arc, of Wilbur talking about how he feels about Fundy siding with Quackity and against him. And the way I initially saw it while watching was, “Okay. He feels betrayed by his son who disagrees with his politics - and thus, him as a person, because your politics are a reflection of your identity, especially in Wilbur’s mind - and it’s perfectly understandable that he’d want to vent about that in private to a close friend. On the other hand, he should be able to recognize that Fundy’s allowed to be his own person and shouldn’t be babied. Fundy is in the right, here, but Wilbur’s feelings shouldn’t be dismissed.”

But then 90% of the tags were just straight-up hate for c!Wilbur, going as far as to say that he should die again. (And this was after we found out how bad the afterlife was for him.) That fucking floored me. I just couldn’t understand how they took this nuanced character aching for ‘the son he knew’ back (hm. very similar to c!Phil, actually) and turned it into ‘wow. This suicidal man sucks and should maybe die.’ I was so close to making a post defending him before realizing - I was letting fandom bias against a character push me further onto the sympathetic side.

And that’s such a fuckin’ weird thing to have happen, because you’d think that exposure to negativity about a character would make you feel more negative about them? But without fail, every time I scroll through the crit tag, or read a critical post about c!Wilbur/L’Manberg, I maybe lean a bit more towards that side for a few hours before swinging back hard onto the apologist side. Because a lot of the critique, to me, is really just, “so what?” after I let it stew a bit.

Then there’s the whole mental health issue. Obviously it doesn’t excuse the shit he did - I know people who have been in the middle of breakdowns and the stuff they say still fucking hurts, even if they didn’t truly mean it. But recognizing that he needs help? That for pretty much all his time on-screen, he was depressed and paranoid, which obviously affects the way he acts? That’s obvious. And were he in the position to get professional help - which he deserves - everything would be much better off. That’s the root of my apologism, I think: He deserves to get better. He’s not inherently evil, or bad, just a fucked up little man who’s ruined his own life and needs help. I want to see him, specifically him, get better.

Narratively, his punishment has been extreme and disproportionate. Every mistake, every choice - good or bad - has led to suffering, on his part. Start a fun little rebellion, maybe to gain some power? War and betrayal. Declare an election to consolidate said power? Lose, and get exiled. Blow up a nation? Die, and even in the afterlife, he can't catch a break. Purely as a sympathetic human, it feels like he deserves to rest. Deserves to heal.

But even medicated and less anxious, or going to therapy for his neuroticism and depression, or whatever, he still would be quite morally grey. A lot of his manipulation, his power hunger, comes from this neuroticism; from needing to feel safe and needed, (just like Quackity.) Not all of it, though. He’d still have his unhealthy ideals about relationships and possession, for example. Less prominent, sure, but still there. Some people, I feel, discount how tied up with his mental illness it is, while others don’t really recognize that it’s also a personality problem. Like, changing those beliefs is changing part of who he fundamentally is, as a person.

Actually, I think the c!Wilbur apologist community, in general, tends to scapegoat his mental illness a little too much? Not in that we explain his actions with it or ask people not to villainize it, (although sometimes I feel that what we call villainizing mental illness is a bit excessive, but it’s not my place to talk about that as someone who doesn’t really relate to Pogtopia!Wilbur,) but in that we use it in discussions a lot. Which is fair, because it permeates every single aspect of his character, but even without it he’d have toxic traits? Like his possessiveness is not purely a byproduct of his mental illness, imo. Nor is his treatment of Fundy. It’s amplified by it, surely, but that little seed of it is there in the first place. Just as c!Dream’s abuse needs to be addressed as a central part of his character, c!Wilbur’s possessiveness does too - and also outside of the context of their mental health, because they’re both brought on by an internal personality flaw, some fucked-up belief, if that makes sense.

As I said before: c!Wilbur is a mess of a human being that I would hate if I actually met. (irl I would’ve been a SWAG supporter, based on policies, but since this is fiction, I was POG.) But because he’s a character, that flies out the window, and I can love him - not even just as a character, in the sense that I appreciate he’s well-crafted, but in terms of personality and all that shit, while recognizing he’s a kinda crappy guy. Because he’s a character. That’s the fun of it.

[tanoraqui]

*sighs in “I meant to do significantly more work this afternoon, but it’s hot and I have plot bunnies”* This happens somewhere over the course of this part of the Burial Mounds-induced amnesia au.

If Nie Huaisang had one real moral failing, it was curiosity.

Okay, so he had a lot of real moral failings. But curiosity was the only one which actively interfered with the others, which tended more toward variations on laziness, cowardice, etc. Curiosity, his brother had snapped, might really get him in trouble one day.

He wasn’t stupid about it, though. He always waited until he wasn’t going to get caught for whatever he was trying. For instance, today he waited until Jiang Cheng was leading the (mostly still new) Jiang Sect disciples through more advanced sword forms, which required spiritual energy to accomplish, so Wei Wuxian was left on the edges. At first he called advice to struggling disciples - he still remembered all of this, which was typical, really - but after a couple circuits of the group, he slid into a vague melancholy. Missing something he couldn’t remember.

“Hey, Wei-xiong,” said Nie Huaisang, strolling beside him. He pointed at random to one of the Jiang disciples, a young woman with a purple scarf tied around her right bicep. “Would you kill that one, if I asked?”

Wei Wuxian stopped walking and looked at him in surprise. “What? Why?”

“She insulted me,” Nie Huaisang extemporized. “And my brother.”

Wei Wuxian looked at woman with something dark in his eyes, but he spoke hesitantly. “But she’s...you know, with the...” One hand passed over his own right bicep, then drifted up to the play with the ribbon in his hair - bright purple, these days, instead of his signature red. Nie Huaisang suspected Jiang Yanli.

“Shouldn’t you ask her, whatsit, Sect Leader?” he managed, though his other hand had fallen to the flute at his waist. “Or First Disciple - those are usually in charge of discipline.”

“I am asking her First Disciple,” said Nie Huaisang, and watched Wei Wuxian give the vague smile he always gave while he waited for someone to say something that made sense through the haze of this strange curse. No names could get through except his own, and fake ones for a minute or so - a distinction that meant on some level he knew the real name, not that it helped - and nothing about how he related to others.

Nie Huaisang changed tack, and pointed at a man in servants’ garb cleaning ashes from a nearby fire pit. “What about him? Same thing - totally insulted me. My brother. My favorite pet oriole.”

“You have a pet orioles?” Wei Wuxian asked, distracted by odd new entertainment. “Wait - you have multiple pet orioles, and a favorite?”

“I have three,” Nie Huaisang said proudly, “and a dozen other birds. But Lu Si is the best songbird of them all - you should hear her sometime!” It wasn’t the first time he’d said it, but it was a little fun to have someone to whom he could just go on and on about his favorite hobbies, over and over, without boring the audience. 

But he was still conducting an experiment here, so he reiterated his pointing at the man cleaning up the campsite. “So, insults can’t be forgiven, you know? So...”

“If you’re sure...” Wei Wuxian spoke uncertainly - but he drew his black flute like it was already part of his hand, wisps of dark resentful energy floating around it and reflecting in his eyes. His gaze looked hungry. The temperature seemed to drop.

Nie Huaisang yelped a nervous laugh and latched onto his arm before the flute could reach his lips. “Wei-xiong, I’m kidding! Please don’t kill anyone - don’t worry, no one would dare insult Lu Si, she’s too lovely, and no one insults me because da-ge would kick their ass!”

Wei Wuxian let his arm be held, but he didn’t lower the flute himself, nor did the the dark hunger leave his gaze as he watched the oblivious servant by the fire.

“WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING!” Wei Wuxian’s stare was disrupted by Jiang Cheng dropping directly in front of them, Sandu settling into his hand. He glowered like a storm. “Wei Wuxian, you’re supposed to be critiquing people! Nie Huaisang, if you’re just going to be distracting, get out of here! Some of us are training!”

“I’m sorry, Jiang-xiong!” Nie Huaisang cowered about 2/3 as much as he would from his brother. “Everyone was doing so well on their own, we just started joking around!” 

“Joking?” Jiang Cheng demanded. “About what?”

“Oh, you know,” said Wei Wuxian, and waved a lazy hand. “Stuff.”

The hand he waved still held the black flute, but he’d relaxed, or at least, adopted a deliberately careless posture. And he radiated the warm affection he always did around Jiang Cheng, these days. The vulnerability would be kind of freaky if it weren’t for the many much freakier aspects of Wei Wuxian these days. 

Also, thank fuck for instinctive co-conspirator-hood, apparently?

“I asked Wei-xiong if he could play nice things on his flute, too.” Nie Huaisang flicked out a fan to hide behind and rushed his words like he was cracking under pressure. “I bet he couldn’t sound as nice as my songbirds.”

Wei Wuxian shot him a narrow-eyed, assessing glance, but Jiang Cheng didn’t notice as he rolled his eyes to the Heavens for aid and patience. 

“Obviously you don’t play sweet music on that thing! For one thing, it’s a- a  powerful cultivation tool! For another, it’s completely consumed by resentful energy!”

“Ah, you doubt my skill?!” Wei Wuxian slapped his chest with dramatic injury. “I’ll have you know I played an entirely sweet duet with that beautiful man with a guqin just the other day, and he definitely uses that thing for cultivation. With this flute, I could play the softest lullaby. I could woo the gentlest maiden!”

Nie Huaisang giggled behind his fan. Jiang Cheng glared at them both. 

“Come on, you can fuck around with Nie Huaisang later,” he said as he grabbed Wei Wuxian by the arm and dragged him around, back toward the Jiang disciples. “Cheng Mei needs extra help on his footwork, and then we’re doing archery drills.”

“Okay, okay!” Wei Wuxian grinned and waved over his shoulder. “I’ll see you later!”

“Have fun getting all sweaty and gross!” Nie Huaisang waved back, and was rewarded with a laugh - and maybe the slightest sliver of suspicion, but that was okay. As far as he could tell, Wei Wuxian could still change his opinion of people, but he wouldn’t remember any particulars of why after just a couple days, and Nie Huaisang didn’t think he’d put such a dent into their friendship that it couldn’t be smoothed over soon. Not with how lightly Wei Wuxian took killing, now. 

(And he did want to sooth it over. Wei Wuxian was still fun to hang out with, even with...everything. At minimum, Nie Huaisang could talk his ears off about birds and art and poetry, in return for continuously losing at cards because nothing had gone wrong with Wei Wuxian’s skill there, either. That is, his skill at out-cheating Nie Huaisang, because apparently the only thing that taught slight-of-hand better than soldiers was the street.)

Nie Huaisang had absolutely no ambitions of aiming the Yiling Patriarch on his own. In fact, he had no doubt that, were Jiang Cheng, Jiang Yanli, and Lan Wangji all somehow incapacitated, he himself would either already be dead or very soon dead, along with everyone else in about 50 miles of the Wei Wuxian. But it was still nice to figure out where he ranked in the meantime, in the man’s (literally) absentminded regard. 

[novelconcepts]

I thought of something, based on an answer of yours I saw yesterday. I don't know if you're into videogames, but Last of Us 2 came out recently and it has a transgender character. A trans boy. I won't bore you with plot and setting, but this character goes through immense suffering which is directly tied to his trans identity. And a bit of a ruckus happenned. Discussions about tokenim and trans representation in media.. And I, myself, am not trans. So I could understand to an extent-(1/4)

(2/4)-but couldn't sympathize and, by extension, care too much. Now what I do identify with is being gay. I still struggle with my identity, but I know this about myself. And I've experienced watching a show just because it has queer characters, I've been queerbaited, I've cringed and eyerolled at rehashed hetero romances. Y'know, things all lesbians go through. Now the Haunting anthology series are of the horror genre. I didn't watch them expecting to be punched in the feels.

(3/4) I knew Bly was gonna be good when I started watching, but what they gave us... Nothing short of iconic. A milestone even! And where I'm going with this is, comparing Dani and Jamie to this trans character I understood the problem of the trans audience. What Dani and Jamie went through had nothing to do with their attraction towards one another! And they were never used and paraded around in media months before the show even came out. Sometimes people use this dumb argument that goes-

(4/4) "I don't see color/sexuality/religion." Of course you do. We all do. And we should! A pretense of homogeneity isn't the answer! But what they did with Dani and Jamie is exactly the way it should be done! I sent this again, because I suspect it didn't reach you the first time, I hope it did now!

I actually played TLOU2 in entirety this summer, and the Lev stuff was definitely on my radar. It’s always a concern in any piece of media, that someone who isn’t part of a particular community will include that community as a scrap or a token--or, worse, as a cautionary tale about that “kind of person”. I’m also not trans (technically, I guess; I dunno that I’m anything where gender is concerned, but that’s a conversation for another day), but the critiques of what the trans community feared going into a story that violent with a character they were going to be instinctively protective of were reasonable. And, yeah--I feel the same whenever queer characters of any kind turn up in darker genres, especially. 

Because, like, if a gay character turns up in a sitcom or a rom-com, they might be a joke. And that’s shitty. But if they turn up in a drama? A horror? A post-apoc zombie game? Then you run the risk of being a joke AND being shown tragedy and pain and told, “Hey--this is for you. This is your future. Say thank you.”

Bly, for me--a white gay person--does feel like a milestone. For how it painted queer love specifically, it does feel like it took into account love and humanity and not “well, Dani was always going to die because she’s gay.” It felt like “Dani’s going to die, because the thesis of the thing is that humans are made to die, and to tell this kind of story, this is just how it goes. But we can make sure she’s loved and happy while she’s here.” And while the creative team/actresses keep saying they just went in valuing human love and not thinking about the gay aspect as much, I find them doing that--coming at the story from a human center, instead of a label place--still allowed them to tell a story that really resonates with the queer experience. The coming out fears, the care of two women learning to trust one another, the found family aspect--that’s all very close to the heart of even modern queerness. They didn’t sacrifice the reality of the thing, they just didn’t focus so completely on the queerness that they turned the story into a plastic representation of what gay love is. It balanced. 

Still, it isn’t perfect. The other thing to consider with darker-tone stories is: is this happening to everyone? Is the violence just targeting the minority group, and everyone else is left safe and sound, or is everyone being damaged because that’s just the kind of story they’re telling? It’s a complicated conversation, and different people are going to have different answers. Bly is a sad story: Owen and Jamie are left without the respective loves of their lives, the kids are tormented by adults they trust, Dani suffers and ends up at the bottom of a lake. The genre comes for everyone, as it were, but I don’t know that we could say it does so equally. The Black community might not feel as kindly toward Bly, for example, since both Rebecca and Hannah wind up horrifically dead without getting to really enjoy happiness, as opposed to the white queer lead getting a lifetime of relative joy before meeting her end. There’s a lot to unpack, and those conversations are important. Like you said, a pretense of homogeny isn’t beneficial when it comes to forward motion through fiction. Or life. I do think starting from a place of humanity and moving outward is helpful for getting a story right, but I also think there’s more to it than just patting yourself on the back for getting one kind of story right. It’s an interesting conversation that’s important to keep having, to keep from seeing storytellers hit the point where they can say “we already did this, and now we’re done.” I would hope, seeing how Bly handled the love story, the next project the team takes on would just keep building on that foundation. 

[kryptsune]

Hi you are an amazing writer i was wondering if you have any tips on salvaging a story that was derailed by a brain fart cause uh i was writing a short story that turned out to be longer and harder to read for anyone thats not myself and now i cant barely look at it... so can i have tips or advice please?

🌼Sorry for the late reply on this I wanted to be able to take the time to give you my own personal advice. First of all, thank you for the kind words :D I am so happy that you enjoy my writing. 

Tips tips tips. Well, there are a couple of things you can do and I have personally done myself. If you feel as though a story has gotten out of hand there is nothing wrong with that at all. I never planned to have either Felldritch or Wonderfell having their own fics in the first place but I enjoy writing for them so much that it was a logical progression. It is difficult for me to assess your personal investment in the project and from what I am reading it seems you no longer are passionate about it?  The truth of the matter is that writing has to be something you enjoy in order to do stories. Sure you can pump out chapter after chapter but it won’t have that spark and why would you put yourself through that suffering in the first place? Sometimes stories are hard to read for others just because of their personality. I have a lot of friends that enjoy my work but haven’t read the story because it is massive. That is something I am keenly aware of often. Welcome to the Underworld is not for the faint of heart or for casual readers and I understand that. It’s not for everyone. I appreciate it when people at least try, however, it is a good way for me to gauge interest at the very least. 

I will break this into 3 parts. The first will be revaluating your current story/project and the second will be things you can do that might make it easier for your readers if you still feel you want to continue it and lastly what you can do to possibly get that passion back if so you can “look at it again.” 1. Evaluating your project: As artists and creatives, we tend to latch onto our work because we put our own personal investment into it. I usually use the analogy that it is like our child and it can be difficult to care for sometimes and yet rewarding at others. This is the first thing you want to do if you are working on a project. Always evaluate. Do you enjoy it anymore?  Do you feel stuck? Is it just not going the way you want it to? Writer's block maybe? All of these can be factors into why you may not enjoy it any longer. 

I felt this with WTU for the longest time and now looking back on it...it was for the wrong reasons. I felt that no one wanted to read it after hours upon hours of writing and editing. It made me sad and I didn’t understand why. The thing is I have changed my mindset when it comes to this. It is hard for me to accurately gauge who reads my work without some kind of feedback but I have a goal. I set out to write an extensive and world built Fell verse and I am going to do it. It’s important to me and it is rewarding just to know that I can do a project as large as the three acts of WTU. Ask yourself why are you writing the story? What are your roadblocks? This will help you come to a decision. 

2. Easing the Readers: If you read my writing you will notice I have a tendency to write a fair bit. Every chapter of WTU ranges from about 15-20 pages of text 11 point font in google docs. That is a lot. I actually have not gone and calculated the word count on it but yeah, a lot. There are simple things you can do however to make the reading a little more digestible for people. 

a. Formating: I never had a problem with reading large blocks of text. That was how I was taught in middle and high school. That said others struggle with large blocks because it makes it difficult to read from a visual perspective (the irony that I am using block text right now). What you can do is break up your paragraphs more often. I have started to do this with older WTU chapters seeing as there are a lot of text blocks. It is a simple and relatively hassle-free way to make it easier. 

b. Pacing: I am by no means the expert of fics however there are some things that I notice in fics that tend to pop up quite frequently. I am not saying to change these things by any means but to evaluate and possibly adjust when needed. PACING. I can’t tell you how many stories I have read with poor or confusing pacing. What I mean by this is that the story is either holding too long in a certain scene or there is no breathing room. WTU and a lot of my fics have dark undertones to them which creates drama and emotional payoff, however, doing this constantly and throwing problem after problem into a story is hard to swallow. The readers need a break. This can be anything from levity to simple character interactions. Not everything is fights or angst. 

This also goes for fics that have none of the former as well. There are so many that are a slice of life and that is fine! Enjoy your cute fluffy fics that said if there is no conflict then what is the point of continuing to read the story? What is holding my investment? Sure the characters can be written well but the point of storytelling is connection. A perfect butterflies and rainbows story is all well and good but you can’t connect to it. That is not how life is. (I am pontificating a little bit but I am honestly really tired of having to explain to people that my fics are M for a reason. No NSFW stuff but rather real-life mental and psychological and emotional situations.)

c. Characters: This kind of also ties into what I was talking about before. A flawless character... is a boring one. Some of peoples favorite characters are the villains, why? Because unlike their heroic counterparts they feel real. They go through things and make their own path. If they just chose differently then things would be different. A lot of times (and no offense to fandom) I find that people make stereotypes of a character. It’s all surface-level stuff. Think about what makes you, you. What have you gone through that causes you to think a certain way or react to things? Our lives are made up of experiences and moments and characters are the exact same way. Most don’t realize this since I hint it throughout the story but everything tells a story. The character's costumes tell a story whether that be the place they live of their own personal style. Why does my Red wear a collar with a seemingly half-broken, fused, and burned chain link? I don’t know... you tell me. 

It’s a storytelling technique called breadcrumbing. This is used to hint to some sort of plot or payoff. A foreshadowing at times. It is an incredibly useful and engaging tool if done properly. I would use my “why does Red do what he does” example but its been beaten to death so I will use Boss as my example instead.   

Boss is the Head of Royal Guard having bested Undyne a long time ago but not everyone was happy with the change of the Guard and that is communicated in character dialogue. In fact, you can use this method to hint to character connections as well. Boss has claw marks in both his scarf and his left eye socket. So.... who could do that kind of damage? If you have read the story *mild Snowdin spoiler* Frisk meets Doggo. An Australian cattle dog-wolf mix that has no love for the current Captain. He was tossed out of the Royal Guard after altercation... maybe attacking a certain lanky skeleton perhaps? It’s not directly stated but certain visual ques could lead someone to that kind of assumption. 

Intertwine your characters, their relationships, their life events. All of this will create far more dynamic storytelling and investment.

d. Planning: Returning back to potential writers' block... I find that something that personally helps me is outlining. I have all of my stories planned out from beginning to end while the middle can be moved around accordingly. That said in every single chapter I outline the main points I want to communicate. It helps with the organization but also keeping your thoughts on track. If you feel you need an extra chapter for character development then you can totally plan that out. Don’t be afraid to change things. It’s your story do what you feel is best for it! 

e. Editors/betas/outside eyes: This is a huge one and can be a little challenging at first. It is helpful to have others look at the work. Those that you trust. Have them look for grammar or even pacing and character inconsistencies. It can be hard to get a critique on your work that you love so much however this makes you far better writer IF IT COMES FROM A REPUTABLE SOURCE. 

I need to clarify this as you cannot please everyone. I have rejected critiques from my beta readers in the past, not because I think I know better but because even they can’t account for your overall thought process. What they think is superfluous may come to have a payoff later on and it needs to be in there for that payoff. That can be anything from character development to plot.  You have to be strong in your conviction. Say yes and no when appropriate and always be kind to your readers. They are taking time out of their lives to help you with your work. The same goes for the betas. Be respectful and kind when giving CONSTRUCTIVE feedback and don’t be offended when the author does not agree. 

3. Breaking the Block: Breaking any kind of block is not easy. In fact, it is a constant nuisance in any creative field. That said there are some simple things that you can do to help. The best example I can give is taking a break. That can range from person to person but generally, sometimes you work on something for so long you need to set it aside and look at it with fresh and new eyes. It is ok to take breaks, hiatus, or just work on something else for your own mental well being. Here are a few things you can do to utilize your break effectively.  a. Don’t even look at it: Some people just need to get away from it all which is totally understandable. I would be farther along in my own fics if I did not break so much but I am determined to put my best foot forward even if it takes me longer. I am also an artist in the drawing and painting sense so I juggle that as well. If you notice my blog right now there has not been much going on in the way of writing because I’ve switched gears. There is nothing wrong with that but I pick my battles. 

b. Work on another project: There is nothing wrong with working on something else just for a change of pace. We are not machines and therefore monotony breeds complacency or burn out in this case. One of the reasons I have 2 other fics is because sometimes I hop from project to project. I know not everyone can mentally do that but it helps me recharge for the main project that I feel worn out on. 

People have also been wondering where TLC (Tender Love and Care) my Red X Frisk fic has been. The truth is that fic is my downtime fic. I do it when I am able to. In fact, as I work on my multiverse boys references lately I have been working on the second chapter of TLC because its a nice change of pace from doing something like Felldritch or the other two.

c. A little at a time:  Any type of project can be overwhelming so taking chunks of it at a time helps compartmentalize it a little easier. Try to write as much as you can a day. It’s not much but by the end of the week, boom, your chapter is done. 

You shouldn’t push yourself or beat yourself up either. I find that I always feel guilty about taking some leisure time because I could be creating more content but that’s unhealthy. Take the time you need and enjoy your games or books. I personally am enjoying the heck out of Animal Crossing right now. 

All in all, I hope some of these tips help a little. Since I do not know what you are working on or why you feel the way you do about it. It is hard for me to give direct advice. What I can say out of all of this is enjoy what you are making. Enjoy the journey and the process. At the end of the day, it is your investment and if you don’t enjoy it what is the point?

 It is nice to get feedback on things, trust me I know sometimes it feels like pulling teeth, and there are clear signs of burn out. We are not art machines, give it some time, reflect, evaluate, and you will find your way. If you really want me to dig deeper to give you specific con crit advice then you are free to DM me. My ask box is also always open! 

[douxreviews]

Supernatural - ‘Moriah’ Review

"Writers lie."

Holy wow. Pun intended.

Did they just make God the ultimate final season bad guy? Did they really? How meta is that?

Before I get into the heavy stuff, let's start with the funny. That explosion of harmful truth at the facial recognition company was classic comic Supernatural from beginning to end – from the stolen yogurt to the stapler queen to the President's deal with Crowley. After all of the recent grimdark, I most certainly did not expect such hilarity to ensue. "I'm Dean Winchester and I'm looking for the Devil's son. This badge is fake." Liar Liar on steroids.

And I totally did not expect Chuck to show up, even after the set-up of Castiel's prayer not that long ago. At first I thought this was a good thing, of course, because Chuck showing up is usually a good thing. Not this time.

Yes, we've been told over and over that Chuck is all about the storytelling. He's the one that writes paperback books in his underwear. It's funny (interesting, not funny ha-ha) how Dean, Sam and Castiel had pretty much had it with Chuck, all at the same time. Note their exasperated expressions as Chuck did everything he could to sell his new magical plot twist gun that could kill anything but would also kill the one who pulled the trigger. Everyone remember the Colt?

But what gave me chills was when they were all in the cemetery ("Swan Song," anyone?), Dean was standing over a kneeling Jack with that gun in his hand, and Chuck had this absorbed little grin on his face. As I said in the opener, holy wow. The Winchesters aren't real people to Chuck, after all. They're just characters in his favorite show. We sort of knew that, without really considering the implications. Archangel Michael told us that Chuck tosses worlds away like failed versions of a book, and he wasn't lying. How about that.

God is their showrunner. He has literally been playing with Dean and Sam their entire lives. They're chess pieces to him, and nothing more. Chuck actually offered to bring back Mary if Dean killed Jack, like, sacrifice your knight and pawn, I'll give you back your queen. When Dean refused to kill Jack and Sam (understandably) lost his temper and shot Chuck with the magic gun, that was it. His squirrels were fighting back. How dare they.

Story's over. Welcome to the End. That final scene as the darkness fell, the monsters rose from hell and the dead from their graves was set to the song, "God Was Never on Your Side." I thought this conflict over Jack would blast Dean and Castiel apart, with Sam in the middle, but instead, this episode ended with the three of them back to back to back, ready to fight off the dead together. So at least there's that.

With the last season approaching, I've been thinking lately that the perfect end for the series would be for Dean and Sam to knock on Mary's white door and join their parents in their special heaven (there'll be peace when you are done). But is Heaven even a thing any more? Will it still exist when the series ends?

If this world of Supernatural isn't what we've been led to believe, what about the Empty? That last shot of Jack was with Billie and the Black Cloud of Lucifer (was that Lucifer?) who made the creepiest smiley face at Jack. Does Billie have the answer to all of this? We've been told that Death can reap God. Can she?

Bits:

— Title musings and various names: "Moriah" is the place where Abraham was supposed to sacrifice Isaac, like Dean was supposed to sacrifice Jack. That cemetery looked a lot like the apocalyptic season five finale. Chuck wanted to name the gun Hammurabi, or The Equalizer. And Amara is in Reno playing Keno.

— Mirror Universe, the name of the facial recognition software company, was just about perfect: a reminder of all of Chuck's discarded universes, as well as all of the alternate universe characters we've been meeting these days.

— Note that Jack was never a threat to Chuck. Jack also didn't kill his grandmother.

— Castiel was thinking that Lucifer's cage might contain Jack. That's actually a pretty good solution.

— Yet another mention of souls. Why is Chuck powerless to change or restore them? Must be important.

— Poor Celine Dion. She's the punchline of a joke, much like Barry Manilow.

— I loved how Chuck critiqued season seven with the Leviathans and season twelve with the British Men of Letters.

— "God Was Never on Your Side" is by Motorhead. Last week, Dean, Sam and Castiel were agents Kilmister, Clarke and Taylor.

— The reference to Crowley and the universe of squirrels reminded me of Moose and Squirrel. Is Crowley in the Empty, too?

— Rob Benedict's credit was at the end. Gold acting stars for Mr. Benedict, by the way. Or possibly "God acting stars." Playing God isn't exactly easy, especially when he's become such a complicated character.

Quotes, the Mostly Chuck edition:

Dean: "Nerds." Sam: "Takes one to know one." Dean: "What?" Sam: "You. Come on, man. You're always calling me a geek, but you know every word to every Led Zeppelin song backwards and forwards, you can discuss in detail every major rock drummer between '67 and '84 and… you watch Jeopardy every night." Dean: "Yeah, okay. But I'm nothing like this gaggle of Zuckerbergs."

Dean: "I'm Dean Winchester and I'm looking for the Devil's son. This badge is fake." That made me laugh like a loon.

Female newscaster: "In what was supposed to be a speech on farming subsidies, the president instead spent more than two hours disclosing his entire tax history, his deep ties to Russia and North Korea, and the, quote, demon deal he made with someone called Crowley. Back to you, Chet. Chet?" Male newscaster: (looks directly at her) "I love you. I have always loved you."

Dean: "When people can't lie, the internet gets real quiet."

Chuck: "I'm a writer. Lying's kind of what we do."

Dean: (to Chuck) "Where the hell have you been?" Dean may be the only person I can think of who can look God in the eye and say something like that.

Chuck: "So! How's things? Okay, look, I get it. I'm the deus from the machina, and you have questions."

Sam: "Where have you been?" Chuck: "It's hard to explain. Everywhere and nowhere. Edge of the universe and beyond. And I saw Springsteen on Broadway. Man's a genius."

Newcaster: "… and it's been confirmed: the Queen of England is, in fact, a lizard." What episode is that from? I can't remember!

Chuck: "Look, the point is, the kid did all that with two words. What's next? He sneezes, and whoops, there goes India?"

Chuck: "Ugh. Billie. I liked the old Death better. He was all about fried pickles and tickle porn. This new Death, she's always sticking her scythe where it doesn't belong." Echoing the fans again.

Sam: "So how many are there? How many other worlds or universes or realities, or whatever?" Chuck: "I don't know. Kinda lost count. Most of them are boring, one's in reverse, in one there's no yellow, one of them's just all squirrels." I'm thinking a world without shrimp.

Sam: "Do you watch us? When you're not here, are you watching us?" Chuck: "Yeah. (Sam gasps) I mean, you're my favorite show."

I could write a few more pages about this episode, but I think I'm done for now. And I am totally impressed. Four out of four squirrels, and what did you guys think?

Billie Doux has been reviewing Supernatural for so long that Dean and Sam Winchester feel like old friends. Courageous, adventurous, gorgeous old friends.

[definitefraggle]

thought-vomit

1. What if... we could critically examine our own sexual and non-sexual desires within the context of the society and power dynamics we grew up in... and STILL NOT shame or harrass anyone else over their own desires? It’s almost like it’s possible to do both!

2. Persuadable targets are the most effective targets. If you phonebank or canvass for a Democrat, your canvass director won’t send you to knock on the doors or call the homes of hardcore Repubicans. They’ll send you after people who are gettable. So it makes sense that antis go after people who are “gettable” in pursuit of ridding their online spaces of content they dislike.

3. What makes the majority-female population of Tumblr Fanfic Fandom “gettable” or less scary to go after vs. straight cis boys at the chonz or Pornhub or e-hentai, etc., is worth examining and critiquing. In other words: the very things that make women “persuadable” ties directly into how women are socialized by a misogynistic world to be accomodating and to put the desires of others over our own. It’s logical to prey on that weakness (probably subconsciously, to be fair) but also gross.

4. Antis would probably be opening themselves up for harrassment/doxxing/etc. if they DID go after the straight cis boys and their objectively much more politically distasteful porn

5. But that doesn’t make it any less frustrating and rage-inducing when they don’t go after those guys. Like, if you care about Problematic Porn and ridding the world of it, porn for straight cis dudes is always going to be worse. Always! And you don’t even have to go to Pornhub, plenty of it is right here on Tumblr!

6. In the Ye Olde 90s and Early 2000s, the sexy trendy hot-in-the-streets crusade was that Fanfic Should Be Well-Written and You Should Be Fine With Strangers Critiquing Your Work and People Who Say They Write Fanfic Just For Fun Aka just want to write what they want and get praised for it no matter the quality level are Aliens We Cannot Understand! And Their Bad Fanfic Is Annoying To Sift Through And it Shouldn't Be This Way!

In retrospect, that was really dumb, like the anti stuff is. The difference is, calling someone a bad writer is much, much less harsh and damaging than calling someone a PEDOPHILE. 

It is also much easier to doxx people these days than it was then. It's also much easier to whip up a mob against people these days than it was then because there are simply more people using the internet now.

There were ship wars back then, also -- I remember hearing, perhaps falsely, that someone was even doxxed or had their employer called during the Ray Wars -- but, again, it's so much easier to doxx and mob people now.

It's also frustrating, as a political junkie who is heavily invested in the world becoming a more just place for the people with the least amount of power, to see what are often basically ship wars using the language of social justice. Like, issues of race, sex, class, etc., obviously affect all aspects of life, including hobbies like fanfic writing, and I am totally on board with, as I said at the start, critically examining everything through that lens. Even masturbation! I'm fine with naval-gazing and discussing and thinking shit over! More than fine with it.

But using those issues disingenuously to basically push for your preferred ship over those icky ships you dislike... it's just making a mockery of these battles that people literally bled and died for. It's beyond stupid.

7. I hope at some point, some ex-anti can do some kind of red-yarn-murder-board and show me if all of this degraded version of meta and discourse literally just came from ontd and sf_d folks jumping ship from LJ to tumblr. Aka, people just moving toxic communities from one platform to another. I mean, I am happy to be proven wrong, show me how it actually started, I'd love to see it. I just, idk, there's probably a really interesting post to be made by someone who was actually part of the first waves of this.

8. I was there for Strikethrough and Boldthrough and I was definitely... amused/irritated at the time at all the, "HOIST THE PIRATE FLAG! TO THE BARRICADES!" rhetoric and I had a looooot of Jew!rage at the CONSTANT invocations of the PASTOR MARTIN NIEMOLLER POEM over FANFIC PORNOGRAPHY even though in past years I had been more chill on parodies of it and in recent years I am much more chill about it again, but I tended to keep my mouth shut because I wasn't one of those affected by the deletions. 

All that said, AO3 ended up being a great thing to come out of it. Boldthrough/Strikethrough was something that legitimately was scary to fanfic writers and really should have been scary to anyone that even wants to discuss books, let alone write fiction of any kind -- I think a Lolita discussion community was deleted?! A community discussing a frickin' book? That should bother you, and if it doesn't, idek what to do with you.

I am not a free speech absolutist, I believe in censoring and no-platforming hate speech and I think there are discussions to be had about what kind of speech and art you want in your community vs. what you don't.

But AO3 had that discussion, and they made the decisions they made, and they made them for reasons I understand and support. If you don't like it: Weebly is right there, bud, make your own archive for your own fic.

My point is: I was not a "HOIST THE MIZZENMAST, LADS! WE FIGHT FOR FREEDOM!" person during Strikethrough and even I know that it wasn't a CABAL OF PEDOS trying to KEEP PEDO-ING AROUND ffs. Stop lying about shit you weren't even around for.

I’m personally veeeery uncomfortable with chan/actual underage fic but if everyone who read or wrote it was a pedophile, then ... look, there cannot statistcally be that many pedophiles. If you think that many people are legitmately sexually attracted to irl children, your personal project shouldn't be ridding the internet of fanfic, it should be working on NUKING THE HUMAN RACE because too many of us aren't attracted to adults and our species no longer works. Like, it's Twelve Monkeys Virus time if you think these are the stats.

8. I hope antis shipping symbrock is the equivalent of when me and other Fanfic! Should! Be Good! people eventually evolved, like pokemon, into Fanfic! Should! Be Porn! people, but it's also fucking frustrating lololol

[mayphenix]

The humour killed Thor:Ragnarok for me

I... didn’t dislike the movie, I actually enjoyed it but what has been called the “best part” of the movie and what everyone has been enjoying just killed the entire movie for me. It was too much, all the time. I’m all for light-hearted jokes, the marvel way but it was too much and I didn’t feel like I watched a Thor movie at all, more like a mix of lots characters vaguely attached to Thor thrown together into a comedy movie, or a joke of an epic movie. There were lots of good points, and some bad points.

More under. Spoilers warning.

I’m going to start with how much of a fan of the Thor franchise I am. Thor is my favorite Avenger, Loki is my absolute favorite character of the entire MCU, I adore the universe of Thor, the Thor movies were my favorite and it was mostly because it was so different from everything else from Marvel. We had some gods, seen differently, heroes, space, epicness and I loved it all - the family drama, the deities different from the myths but still interesting, I absolutely love it all. Perhaps I had too many expectations for this movie but I was going to the theater knowing I might be disappointed because over timewhen we saw new stuff for this movie, so many things didn’t seem right with the accumulation of characters, old and news, of stories to explain and introduce in this final movie and most especially, the obvious emphasis on humour the entire movie has been promoted with. I was worried, but I went in the theater positive. Thor franchise, and Loki being my favorite character and everything I expected from this movie might make this review a little biased but... well.

About the good points:

- The special effects. I don’t think I need to give an entire speech on that, everything was absolutely beautiful and breathtaking and phenomenal. The opening battle? Amazing, the sequence with Mjollnir was WOW. So, nothing disappointing with the special effects, if anything, it was even more amazing than usual.

- The battles. All great, good fighting, good characters, the only problem being that when it was final, epic battles...the epicness died because it was stopped with some joke.

- The new characters: I absolutely love Hela, Valkyrie and even Krudge (if that’s his name?) All amazing characters who can fight, various, POC, with ptsd, I love it. They even go through some character development in the movie but it felt a little rushed at times - I would have wished for Valkyrie to at least appear like she considered joining Thor’s team a little more BEFORE doing it because it just felt sudden and because she didn’t know what else to do with the Grand Master’s ultimatum?

- Our beloved old characters: some were well used, some not so well. Loki was the only fully satisfying character who was all mischief and more to his true-self than the dramatic, traumatized character we’ve seen so far without disgarding what had happened to him and the depth of his character. Thor was charming with his sense of humor but it felt to me like he was belittled. He’s a god, he’s a freaking god, he’s a PRINCE. But too often he appeared like the big, friendly dork and it’s annoying. The good thing about Thor is that he really seemed concerned about the universe, Asgard, its people and his motivations wasn’t because of Jane like previous movies, it seemed more... realistic, for a royal god. I’m not an enormous fan of Banner and the Hulk, but he’s sweet, and he still is in this movie but..ultimately I don’t feel like he played a huge part in the movie, like he had any significant importance. It was more “oh we haven’t seen the Hulk in a while let’s add him here”. Yes, he helped espcae and fought Fenris but it wasn’t that epic in my opinion, I expected more of their fight. But other than that? What did he do? Make jokes, make people laugh but that’s it? He asked about Nat but 5mn after meeting Valkyrie he’s all “she’s strong, she’s beautiful” so... wtf? Odin was here, but I feel like his end was too quick - we didn’t have a quick explanation on what really happened, how he felt, he just “all right my sons, a hel of a trouble is coming because I messed up again, be ready” and then he went into fairy dust in the sky. I cried at his death, but mostly because he called Loki his son, and he treated both as equals despite everything that had happened. Heimdall had his importance but because he was the only character who seemed to take things seriously, he felt out of place. The Warrior Three...how could they kill them off like that? We barely saw them, barely recognize them and oops, dead at Hela’s feet. I get it, she’s powerful but they’re some of the strongest warriors of Asgard. They could have had at least a bit of a fight to end in a glrious battle not... that.

- The plot and twists: I didn’t want Hela to be Loki’s daughter because it would have come out of nowhere so I’m glad of what they did, but once again, I would have wished for more explanation tha just “she’s Odin’s first born turned evil”. Like...who is her mother? What happened? No more details on how he banished a first child and erased her memory from all of Asgard? Why is she so freaking powerful if she’s “just” his daughter?? I need more than just what we were given. The final twist with Ragnarok being the only way to defeat her, that LOKI was the one to cause it directly, that Asgard was a people and not a place - I LOVED IT! It was totally unexpected so I loved how it turned out.

- I’d need to rewatch the movie to fully enjoy the depth of this point but I think that there were lots of hidden political critiques and stuff said in this movie, laying behind everything, which ought to be taken in consideration more fully but like I said, I’d need to watch it more to understand it all.

- I’ll finish with MY FAVORITE PART OF THIS MOVIE: LOKI AND THOR (kinda) RECONCILIATION! THey finally talked, they finaly came  to terms with it all and there are already several posts about how perfectly done it was made so just... Thank you for finally bringing them back together as a team and brothers. That’s all I wanted for this movie, with the hope they won’t ruin it all again in Infinity Wars...

The bad points:

- HUMOUR EVERYWHERE. Except maybe a few lacks of details here and there which can be forgiven with the length of the movie and its final cut, the really only one and big problem is the constant presence of humour. I like little jokes, I laughed at several of them. At hte begining it was great and all. Loki’s reactions mostly were hilarious, the button pushed when they escpae and it provokes firework that was good too. But the rest of ti? It insisted too much, it constantly came back, it ruined the moods, it just felt off, it wasn’t even fun. Where do I even start? The sexual jokes were... too much, like I thought it was a family movie? Why do you talk about orgies, and anus, and that thing Valkyrie did with her hips? Where did it come from? Not necessary. The ridiculness of these jokes too -  Thor throwing a ball that rebounced and put him down? Nope. Banner jumping down for an epic landing as the Hulk but landing on his face? *heavy sigh*, the end of Asgard and we have some silly lines ruining the intensity of the moment? At this point of the movie I just couldn’t handle these stupid lines that weren’t even fun anymore. The final epic battle got me sighing ALL THE TIME because there was always some stupid moment put here to make you laugh when it’s not the moment to be funny but the moment to fight and be heroes. It’s a superhero movie, not a comedy. It’s Thor’s final movie, not a joke! It’s freaking Ragnarok, not good-hearted playtime!

- Because of this forced and too heavy humour, I feel like the middle of the movie in Sakaar or whatever it’s called is way too long for what it’s worth. It was too much humour and in the end the final battle felt rushed. Perhaps it was just because it was constantly cut because of the stupid jokes, but it felt like because there had been so much in the midlde for Sakaar, some fights for the final battle were finished very quickly (I’m mostly thinking of Fenris VS Hulk, Skuge’s comeback, Hulk VS Surtr (if you can call that a battle), Surtr period, Loki period...)

- The Guardians of the Galaxy vibe. Dont get me wrong, I love the colors and I love the GotG. But it was supposed to eb a Thor movie and it didn’t feel like one... I barely heard Thor’s theme, it was only all about this colorful planet and atmosphere but it was so similar to GotG that well, it took away what made Thor franchise unique in its own way: it’s not a superhero from Earth,  he’s a god and prince from a majestic place, it’s epic and royal and deeper than just “the god of thunder swinging a hammer”. THAT’S what I like about Thor, the multidimensions used for his movies, character and universe that made it apart from the rest of the Avengers movies and the GofG. But adding such a GofG vibe twisted the universe of Thor we had so far that was unlike any other.

Questionable points:

I’d need to rewatch the movie a few times, but there were a few things that seemed rushed...and a few things that were probably deeper than a first viewing allows you to conceive with Waititi’s directing and what he tried to express through this movie (too bad people only remember how ‘fun’ it was, uh) and I’d like to think moer about the parallels made between Odin/Hela and Thor/Loki and basically, everything that had some sense and wasn’t taken as a joke.

Conclusion

...It could have been worse. I had my fears, it could have even been an epic end for the Thor franchise. If the constant, out of place, ridiculous humour (that really..didn’t make me laugh that much) hadn’t ruind the epic, emotional moments.

[ediblenapkin-moved]

Wil in Wonderland-1

WELP I’M SORRY BUT I FELL FOR THE CLICHE AGAIN, I’M A SUCKER FOR IT SO IF SOMEONE’S ALREADY DONE IT I’M SORRY

I’ve had this idea laying around for a while now so I at least need to get it off my chest okay

If for some reason you want to be tagged in the next one just reblog and say so

To be honest, noone had really been paying any attention to Wilford that day until he collapsed.

Dark had been off doing... something, what exactly noone wanted to know; Bing and King had been out, the Googles in their room; Ed and Silver Shepard had been in a whole different section of the mansion, ‘exploring some of your guys’ old stuff that hasn’t been touched since Dark was born, probably’; Dr. Iplier had been cleaning his office because it was Sunday, and he didn’t really have anything better to do; most of the Jims had been in their room, also doing something that noone knew about; Bim had been in the living room, nearly asleep on the couch from having stayed up late the previous night working on a new show idea.

Most of them had seen Wil that day, running by, claiming to be chasing an intruder, but Wil’s footsteps were the only ones that could be heard. He asked if they’d seen this intruder, they said no and he left. He’d done this to the Googles, Ed and Shepard, Dr. Iplier, and Bim- and then collapsed suddenly, without warning, when turning away from Bim.

After several shouts, five Messenger Jims and twenty minutes, all the egos were either inside or directly outside the doctor’s office, waiting for something to happen.

Dr. Iplier huffed. “He should have woken up by now. There’s no sign of any injury, he didn’t hit his head and he sounded awake when he was running by earlier. Then again, he did say he was chasing someone- and I didn’t see anyone else run by before him.”

“So we made all this commotion just because Wil stayed up too late last night and didn’t sleep? Great.” Dark sighed before standing, looking at the other egos. “Make yourselves scarce.” He pushed through the crowd and was gone.

Slowly, most of them began to walk away, but Bim and Reporter Jim remained.

“Are you sure he’s gonna be alright? Because it didn’t seem like he was exhausted to me,” Bim whispered, looking over his shoulder at the egos walking away.

“That’s the only explanation I have.” The doctor sat down at his desk, going back to organizing.

Bim watched for a moment before turning around and following the others.

Wil didn’t remember falling asleep, but here he was, waking up.

His eyes opened slowly as he sat up. Wincing, he pressed a hand to his temple- what had happened?

“Ow...”

For the time being, it was going to have to wait. Wil took a couple deep breaths before looking up and freezing.

This wasn’t his room.

He was currently sitting in the middle of a clearing, surrounded by tons of plants he’d sworn he’d never seen before. The sky far above was a shocking blue, with fantasy-esque clouds suspended just far enough apart from each other to be perfect. Not to mention he’d somehow gotten outside after having been... where in the mansion again? Eh, it was indoors. Good enough... but that still left the question, how did he get out here?

In typical fashion, Wil rolled to his feet, then put his hands on his hips. 

“Hmm... I’m not tied up, drugged, and... I didn’t change clothes.”

Having looked down at himself, he saw that someone... somehow.... had changed his clothes. Half of it was what he normally wore, but the other half was radically different. It consisted of a tan, knee-length overcoat with his regular shirt underneath, and a red suspender instead of the normal pink. Not to mention on one foot was his usual shoe, but on the other his pant leg was tucked into a boot. He then caught the sight of something on the left side of his face- apart from his mustache, which seemed untouched- was a monocle, with three smaller magnifying lenses attached to the rim. 

After taking off the monocle and fiddling with the lenses, he looked up and realized that his left field of vision was suddenly blurry.

“What? That wasn’t like that a minute ago... hmm...” 

When the monocle was lifted back into place, it wasn’t blurry anymore. Wil lifted it again, turned around, and put it back.

And then he stopped.

A man was standing there, dressed in a black vest and slacks, facing away from Wil. He was holding something in his hand, and was muttering something inaudibly.

What was most odd about this man, though, was the huge white rabbit ears twitching on his head. And not just the type you buy from the store on a headband. No, these were much bigger. And he had a matching cotton-ball tail.

Finally, Wil caught a piece of the man’s words- “...to the trial, Master will be so displeased...” 

A trial? Well, that sounded important. Maybe Wil could follow him and find out exactly how he’d gotten here, or at the very least get back to the mansion. Dark was probably flipping out by now, being strict about something or wanting to know if Wil had caused this disaster today.

Suddenly, the bunny man put whatever he was holding back into his pocket before starting to run deeper into the foliage.

Wil blinked, then shouted and began to run after. “Hey! Where are you going?”

The bunny man didn’t stop or say anything back, but the sound of movement from up ahead was still audible.

Wil practically jumped into the bushes, then kept running and yelling, leaving the clearing empty...

...Save for a single piece of paper that floated to the dirt, facedown.

@ghostcockblocker​ @pleaseletthisjimbetaken​ @ironwoman359 @splatoon-jim  CRITIQUE ME PLEASE

[b-uwu-ng]

Note taking tips

Notebook for each class. 

Have a separate notebook for each class. It keeps things organized. Plus, if you keep all of your classes’ notes in the same notebook and you lose that notebook, you’re pretty much SOL. Write clearly. If you’re going to handwrite your notes, make sure you can read them later. PenMANship. It’s got the word “man” in it, so it’s manly. Let go of perfectionism The purpose of note-taking is simple: to help you study better and more quickly. First, what’s new to you? There’s no point in writing down facts you already know. If you already know the Declaration of Independence was written and signed in 1776, there’s no reason to write that down. Anything you know you know you can leave out of your notes. Second, what’s relevant? What information is most likely to be of use later, whether on a test, in an essay, or in completing a project? Focus on points that directly relate to or illustrate your reading (which means you’ll have to have actually done the reading…). The kinds of information to pay special attention to are: 

* Dates of events: Dates allow you to 

a) create a chronology, putting things in order according to when they happened, and

b) understand the context of an event. For instance, knowing Isaac Newton was born in 1643 allows you to situate his work in relation to that of other physicists who came before and after him, as well as in relation to other trends of the 17th century.

 * Names of people: Being able to associate names with key ideas also helps remember ideas better and, when names come up again, to recognize ties between different ideas whether proposed by the same individuals or by people related in some way.

 * Theories: Any statement of a theory should be recorded — theories are the main points of most classes. 

* Definitions: Like theories, these are the main points and, unless you are positive you already know the definition of a term, should be written down. Keep in mind that many fields use everyday words in ways that are unfamiliar to us. 

 * Arguments and debates: Any list of pros and cons, any critique of a key idea, both sides of any debate related in class or your reading should be recorded. This is the stuff that advancement in every discipline emerges from, and will help you understand both how ideas have changed (and why) but also the process of thought and development within the particular discipline you are studying. 

* Images and exercises: Whenever an image is used to illustrate a point, or when an in-class exercise is performed, a few words are in order to record the experience. Obviously it’s overkill to describe every tiny detail, but a short description of a painting or a short statement about what the class did should be enough to remind you and help reconstruct the experience. 

 * Other stuff: Just about anything a professor writes on a board should probably be written down, unless it’s either self-evident or something you already know. Titles of books, movies, TV series, and other media are usually useful, though they may be irrelevant to the topic at hand; I usually put this sort of stuff in the margin to look up later (it’s often useful for research papers, for example). Pay attention to other student’s comments, too — try to capture at least the gist of comments that add to your understanding. 

* Your own questions: Make sure to record your own questions about the material as they occur to you. This will help you remember to ask the professor or look something up later, as well as prompt you to think through the gaps in your understanding. 

* Note-Taking Techniques: You don’t have to be super-fancy in your note-taking to be effective, but there are a few techniques that seem to work best for most people.

* Outlining: Whether you use Roman numerals or bullet points, outlining is an effective way to capture the hierarchical relationships between ideas and data. In a history class, you might write the name of an important leader, and under it the key events that he or she was involved in. Under each of them, a short description. And so on. Outlining is a great way to take notes from books, because the author has usually organized the material in a fairly effective way, and you can go from start to end of a chapter and simply reproduce that structure in your notes.For lectures, however, outlining has limitations. The relationship between ideas isn’t always hierarchical, and the instructor might jump around a lot. A point later in the lecture might relate better to information earlier in the lecture, leaving you to either 

a) flip back and forth to find where the information goes best (and hope there’s still room to write it in) 

b) risk losing the relationship between what the professor just said and what she said before. 
 

* Mind-mapping: For lectures, a mind-map might be a more appropriate way of keeping track of the relationships between ideas. Here’s the idea: in the center of a blank sheet of paper, you write the lecture’s main topic. As new sub-topics are introduced (the kind of thing you’d create a new heading for in an outline), you draw a branch outward from the center and write the sub-topic along the branch. Then each point under that heading gets its own, smaller branch off the main one. When another new sub-topic is mentioned, you draw a new main branch from the center. And so on. The thing is, if a point should go under the first heading but you’re on the fourth heading, you can easily just draw it in on the first branch. Likewise, if a point connects to two different ideas, you can connect it to two different branches. If you want to neaten things up later, you can re-draw the map or type it up 

 * The Cornell System: The Cornell System is a simple but powerful system for increasing your recall and the usefulness of your notes. About a quarter of the way from the bottom of a sheet of paper, draw a line across the width of the page. Draw another line from that line to the top, about 2 inches (5 cm) from the right-hand edge of the sheet. You’ve divided your page into three sections. In the largest section, you take notes normally — you can outline or mind-map or whatever. After the lecture, write a series of “cues” into the skinny column on the right, questions about the material you’ve just taken notes on. This will help you process the information from the lecture or reading, as well as providing a handy study tool when exams come along: simply cover the main section and try to answer the questions. In the bottom section, you write a short, 2-3 line summary in your own words of the material you’ve covered. Again, this helps you process the information by forcing you to use it in a new way; it also provides a useful reference when you’re trying to find something in your notes later. Charting Method If your professor’s lecture will be focused on comparing and contrasting two or more ideas, you might consider using the charting method. Create a table in the note-taking program you’re using. Make as many columns as there are categories that you’re comparing and contrasting. Label each column with a category. As you listen to the lecture, record the notes under the appropriate category.

[restoringsanity]

Wait, I don't understand your last post. Are you saying ages don't matter because you can change them? Because I agree with you but then you just stated basic stuff about how authors and creators choose the character's age and how they act and stuff and ??? I thought that was common knowledge??? Do antis think you can't change a character's age? And if so, why?

The post that prompted this ask.Disclaimer: This is looong. Also, it’s observational. I refer to science, but I’m not a scientist. I’m open to critique and correction.#1 Intro#2 Explanation#3 Examples & CounterArgument#4 Scientific Basis & Implications; SociologicalContext#5 Final Statement#1 Intro

Allow me to assure you that I am very happy you don’t fullyunderstand the purpose or necessity of my last post – I don’t meanto condescend or patronize, at all. I am sincere. It means that,perhaps, you haven’t yet been exposed to a certain brand of ‘logic’that I’ve been exposed to. If any of what I said seems obvious toyou, then you grasp a concept that is diffcult to process for some,and that some consider problematic for reasons that are beyondcreative.#2 Explanation

„you just stated basicstuff about how authors and creators choose the character’s age andhow they act and stuff and ???“

I’ll try to be as specific aspossible. The problem does not lie with the original creators per se,but how transformative media handles the characters in question –how fanart/fanfiction treats the characters. A number of peoplechoose to consider the original creator’s intention and theirspecific configurations for a character to be untouchable, even intransformative media. I don’t exactly have a strong position on this,to some degree – although I believe that transformative mediainherently strives to be what’s on the label: transformative. That’snot entirely the point I was trying to make, though. It’s yet morespecific.

„I thought that was common knowledge??? Do antis think youcan’t change a character’s age? And if so, why?“

Yes. Some do,in fact, think so. I’ll first try to present their reasoning in anunbiased fashion, then offer my own perspective on it.Changingthe age of a fictional character, or 'ageing them up’, especially ifthey’re underage – is 'predatory’. It’s supposedly akin to waitingfor someone to 'become legal’ in the real world. #3Examples & Counter ArgumentA real-world example:

Afamous teenage starlet is being fawned over by (adult) fans. Theyexpress the idea that they can’t wait for them to finally reach theage of majority, so that it will be legal for them to pursue thestarlet in a sexual manner.Their desire is direct, real, andaimed at the person (actual, real person) in question. One might betempted to conclude that their desire and attraction are of adivergent variety.

To contrast the real-world example, I’lloffer one that deals with a fictional character:

A fictionalteenage character is being fawned over by (adult) fans. They expressthe idea that they would like to 'age them up’ in their own work, forvarious reasons. The reasons might be a) their personal level ofcomfort b) an interest in developing the character further and pasttheir 'canon’ age c) personal preference, and many more. Theirintention might involve putting the character in sexualscenarios.Their desire is indirect, projected, and focused on anidea, rather than a person (actual, real person). Still, one might betempted to conclude that their desire and attraction are of adivergent variety.

To summarize; the idea is that the age of afictional character bears as much meaning and weight as the age of areal person, and any implications concerning the people expressing adirect or indirect desire for them are judged and measured equally,on equal terms.Now, I’ll proceed to present my counterargument.1. Firstly, acknowledging the questionable moralityof pursuing an underage person (actual, real person) and waiting forthem to reach the age of majority isn’t predatory. It’s actingaccording to law, and according to a codex of morals that has beenagreed upon by – at the very least – a considerable portion ofsociety. Desire itself isn’t inherently predatory. Desire is acomplex emotion. It manifests, and demands, but it does not enable,and it does not force. Expressing desire is just that – anexpression. Attraction isn’t a form of compulsion. It’s a form ofwanting, and wanting something or someone doesn’t automatically implyaction. Wanting is inaction. Having is action. These two are notinterchangeable.2. Secondly – and we’re dealing with thefictional example now – age in fiction does not automatically havethe same function and implication as it does in real life. Acharacter does not age on their own. They are not born. They do notgrow on their own. They are incapable of making experiences on theirown. They do not exist. They’re not real. They are decidedly,unquestionably, indubitably, demonstrably not real. They arenot you, they are not like you, they are not anyone,they are not. They’re an idea, a concept, a canvas foryou to project onto. Here’s where I’ll have to get a little (or alot) more general to further emphasize the point I’m making.#4Scientific Basis & Implications; Sociological ContextAny(direct) effect a fictional character or concept may have on you is aconsequence of you – it’s a consequence of the experiences you’vemade, how you process and experience their actions, their inactions,and the identifiers they’re presented with. In other words, how youprocess ideas and concepts, and how (much) they affect you  isdirectly connected to how you process most type of thought. It istied in with your level of maturity, your ability to differentiatebetween what’s real and what isn’t, and how well you deal withcompulsion and suggestion. It is veryimportant to understand this. If the existence, mention or suggestionof an act is enough to convince you to commit the act – youabsolutely need some form of (temporary) assistance. I’m decidedlynot being snarky, and I’m not exaggerating.The human brainhas (as far as we’re aware of) at least two components that deal withcreating, experiencing and evaluating impulse, and exercisingcontrol. The limbic system – in simplistic terms – deals withemotion and instinctive behavior. It acts in tandem with theprefrontal cortex, which deals with integration of memory content(experiences), evaluation of emotion, and planning of action. Theprefrontal cortex is also referred to as „SupervisoryAttentional System“ (SAS).Any claims denying people of aninherent level of agency and control over their actions disregard –to some extent – two integral parts of our brain. Damage to theprefrontal cortex may lead todifferent evaluation of impulses or sensory input, but not any givenindividual has suffered damage to their prefrontal cortex or had itdevelop differently in the womb. Of course, science is still verymuch in the process of studying the brain, and we know a merefragment of what there is to know. We do know, though, that what weperceive as morals and ethics and how 'good’ or 'bad’ a person mightappear to be, is also tied in with the biological development andbiochemical processes in their body (and brain, specifically).Thefollowing I had to preface with all this, so I can reallyhammer in the concept I’m trying to get across, and that people needto understand.Whenyou state that fiction affects reality, you need to understand whatyou’re saying. You’re saying fiction affects people.Yes – it does. But to what degree? Your understanding of thissubject needs to be nuanced.Here’swhat I stated earlier:

„If the existence, mention orsuggestion of an act is enough to convince you to commit the act –you absolutely need some form of (temporary) assistance.“

Whyis that? What might compel me to make such a claim? It’s the merefact that – if you can’t tell fiction from reality, and fictiondirectly affects you to a degree that disables your agency and allbut forces you toimitate, emulate, recreate or copy fictive concepts, then – in verysimple terms – your brain might not be working quite right, and itmight very well be an issue that is deserving of attention. Ifyou’re affected by the active and passive 'experiences’ ( – thesituations they’re put in) of a fictional character thatsupposedly/allegedly/apparently represents a concept that is similarto your actual experiences to a degree that causes you immensediscomfort, you may want to investigate your situation and reconsiderthe content you expose yourself to. Or in anon-run-on-sentence-format: If, for example, Fictional Character Asubjects others to harm, or is being subject to harm, and thataffects you to an immenselyuncomfortably degree, then you mightwant to talk to someone about it.The prerequisite for peoplebeing affected by fiction to an unhealthy, dangerous andharmful degree, is for themto start out affected, or unhealthy. It’s a mental health issue. Youneed to understand who you need to protect, and from what. If youwant to protect those who are affected by fiction to an unhealthy,dangerous and harmfuldegree, your activism needs to focus on mental health (issues), andnot on censorship. This is a tested, tried and true cop-out ofsociety. We notice a problem, and our approach starts out – andoften further remains – symptomatic. Because it’s significantlyeasier, and it doesn’t require the ability of complex thought.Pregnant teens? Tell them to stop fucking. Criminal youth? Makean attempt at discouraging crime by establishing harsher penalties.Kids shooting up schools? Blame just about everything other than asystem that treats the mentally ill as a nuisance and paints them aspotentially violent offenders; a system that is uncomfortablewith mental illness. Someone was sexually assaulted? Well – whatdid they wear?Additionally, I’m being very specific about thedegree of being affected that I consider worthy of attention. Havinga reaction to fiction is more often than not (– I’d even argue: inall cases) the desired effect. Having an immense, intense, unhealthy, dangerous and harmful reactionis not the desired effect.#5Final StatementNowthat I’ve established a staggering amount of context, I’ll saythis:If, in allhonesty, you believe that 'age-ing up’ a fictional character is inany way, shape or form 'predatory’, or harmful to anyone, youabsolutely, absolutelyneed to re-evaluate your position. You are part of many problems, andyou’re likely unaware of it.So– my dear anon, do you understand now why I need to be as specificand excruciatingly obvious as I can be? Why I need to state theabsolute common, trivial and generally understood? It’s becausecritical thought is a rare good (in some parts of tumblr), and that’sa problem.

[secretanimelover]

Hwarang rewrite Chapter 1

If you have any questions or critiques let me know! Also warning this is long like around 8,000 words or so. I’ve posted to livejournal too if you would like to read it there.

http://secretanimelove.livejournal.com/937.html

A young man with an unimpressed look on his handsome face stands in the path of three other men. His long hair is windblown and kept out of his eyes by a strip of clothe tied around his head. His clothes are worn and plain looking but are not nearly in as rough a state as the men who are poorly trying to intimidate him.

“It’s bribing day which means I’m busy, can’t you just leave?” he sighs.

“we both know there can’t be two leaders in one village,” The leader of the three taunts while combing his obnoxious pointed hair. His spiky headed lackeys nod and snicker in agreement. The boy huffs out a breath in annoyance.

“Fine you’re the head” he replies causing looks of bafflement.

“What kind of trick are you trying to pull?” the leader says seemingly insulted.

“I’m not trying to pull anything I’m nervous you ass,” he replies nonchalantly, “if I get into trouble one more time my old man said he’d kill me himself.” His mood shifts into one of sarcastic charitableness, “Isn’t it great? I don’t have to beat you guys up and you get to be the leader or whatever! So, you can just go.” He starts walking away satisfied but the other men just don’t know how to take a hint.

“I heard your mother was so quick to throw you away that she didn’t even want name you,” The leader taunts, “then you should live as if you were dead and stop bugging me.”

“Well at least I tried.” He relents and turns around to face the men again while dramatically pulling out a 14-sided die. The men become anxious at the sight of the die knowing this is how he determines his strategy to beat people. The die is thrown up several meters into the air before being caught. “The person’s nose,” he mumbles as he reads the die. The men gulp before one of the underlings shouts to try and get the first hit while the young man is unprepared. The leader loudly charges forward and throws a punch which is easily dodged. But the boy gets too cocky and ends up tripping and falling face first onto the dirt road. His face flushes a bit in embarrassment as he lays on the ground and questions his luck.

“Did I hit him? I did, right?” The leader asks amazed. The other two men excitedly affirm that he had struck the boy and all three men begin to celebrate their “victory”. That is, until a yell comes piercing through the country air. A very tall, gangly, young man is clumsily charging at them, falling over several times before he reaches the group. He arrives to the “conflict” by jump kicking the leader in the chest and proceeding to land in what he believes to be an intimidating fighting stance.

“Don’t touch him! Fight me instead!” he proclaims throwing a few more small kicks for effect. The men, weirded out but still knowing they outnumber the giant boy, start to encircle him. “Getting up before they start hitting me would be nice!” he complains towards his friend who is still on the ground stewing in his own embarrassment. The other boy comes back to senses and quickly rises from the ground. As an afterthought, the tall boy quickly adds “don’t beat them up too badly though.”

“Hey jerks,” the now slightly pissed off boy says, “Run.”  Quickly scrambling to get a head start the three men take off. The two young friends closely following behind them into the forest. They dodge and weave on the paths through the forest as the taller boy once again trips leaving the rest of the pursuit to his friend.  Seeming to have lucked out the three men cross a small movable bridge. Acting quickly, they yank the bridge off balance letting it fall into the gap just as the boy catches up with them. They cackle because of their success and begin taunting him again from across the several meter gap, daring him to try and risk injury or worse if he were to try and come after them.

“Hey, what was his nickname again?” the leader asks breathless.

“Dog-bird.”

“Wait, why?” the leader asks slightly worried.

“He’s strong and loyal like a dog and he’s agile like a bird.” Comes the reply. Meanwhile the boy who had been walking away from them suddenly turns and sprints towards the gap. When he reaches the very edge, he launches himself into the air successfully surprising and over taking the men.

               Meanwhile, in the capital city of the Silla kingdom, an old man sits on the floor of a prison cell. He is a mess with his long greying hair sticking up every which way and his clothes in tatters. His hand shoots out and catches a fly that he intends to eat, however he is interrupted by a regal looking man entering his cell. “Be on your best behavior when you meet the queen.” It’s an order, not a request. The old man hums and bows his head in confirmation. Queen dowager Jiso enters the cell in all her regal glory with her abundant hair artfully styled and adorned with hair ornaments and wearing black and gold silk robes.

               “What is a best friend of the former king doing locked up in here?” her smooth voice in mostly controlled but there is disappointment leaking into her tone.  The old man only chuckles a little at the question.

               “I didn’t like the deceased king that much towards the end.” He tells her truthfully while not looking directly at her, “ I had sexual relations with his concubine, everyone said I had played around.”

               “You must not like this sacred kingdom then?” The queen asks letting some worry come through her façade. The man laughs and calmly quips back to the queen.

               “This is a country where a mother kicked out her own son.  A mother who couldn’t get rid of her greed even after being regent for 10 years.” he continues to stare off at the corner of the room as he concludes, “of course I have no choice but not to like it.” Queen Jiso remains as stone faced as she can and ignores his comments.

               “Have you thought about my request?” she asks calmly.

               “I have heard that the queen dowager is intelligent and cunning. But I think that the rumors are false.” He yawns causing the two guards of the queen to twitch in irritation at the sheer audacity of the man before them. “I’m a very easily exhausted person why do you keep asking me? What will you even do?”

               “I plan to make a group of guards that would give up their lives for their king.” She replies calmly.  The man chuckles and scoffs as he hears the idea.

               “A group of guards. Sounds good.” The reply is mix of sarcasm and amusement, “But all of the guards are being used by the officials. Who else would hold weapons and shoot arrows for the king? Are you going to get them from the kingdom of Baekje or Goguryeo?”

               “I am planning to recruit the sons of the officials.” The queen replies completely composed now. The grin that had been on the man’s face for the entire conversation slips off as he comprehends her statement. “Please teach them.” She continues, “Instead of their parents and families, they need to become loyal to the king and the country.”

               “And you think I would do this because…?” the man questions.

               “Weren’t you just saying that you wanted my regency to end? If you achieve in creating what I have asked I will step down from the throne cleanly.” She explains. The man’s face is serious as he thinks about what the queen is asking of him, but lets out a sigh and starts to laugh because he knows that this opportunity is too good to pass up.

               The two young friends, on the other hand, are conversing underneath a large tree that grows on a hill overlooking the valley that contains the capital. The tall boy is bragging about how he used to live in the city and dreaming about finding his family. He’s told what stories he could remember from his childhood to his friend so many times now that he could perfectly repeat them back to him.

               “When I figure out how to get into the capital I know I’ll be able to find them using this.” He smiles as he fiddles with the wood bead necklace around his neck. It’s a common sight, him dreamily going on like this, planning the perfect reunion with his father and younger sister and bringing his best friend, and surrogate brother, along and integrating him into his family to make up for the one he never got to have.

               “No matter what Mak Moon. We are going to get in there, okay?” Dog-bird, or Moo Myung as he was more commonly referred, assures him before smacking him lightly and scolding, “as long as you don’t chicken out again!”

               “If we go in as commoners we will be shot full of arrows or run through with spears!” Mak Moon whines defensively back, “Or get our heads cut off.” The other boy sighs agitated and is about to egg him on more before Mak Moon continues softly, “but it’s my home where I lived together with my mother, father, and little sister.” He grips his necklace determined, “I will find my family with this and I will find my identity too.”

               “I bet you won’t find anything with that.”

               “People find out stuff like this all the time!”

               Moo Myung smiles at his friend while holding in his laughter. Meanwhile, Mak Moon is pouting while tucking his necklace back inside his worn shirt.

               “You know you can still back out? I don’t want to force you to go somewhere you don’t want to.” Mak Moon asks passively.

               “I’ve already told you that I want to go. You’re family and wherever you go, I go. Anyways who cares if I am not allowed to be there because I’m a peasant, all people are the same so why shouldn’t I go?” his friend shoots back.

               “How did you become so fearless?” Mak Moon asks humoring his friend.

               “He who has a lot is the one with fear.” Moo Myung quotes, “I have nothing to be afraid of.” His eyes widen as he realizes that they have made a huge mistake. “Payment.” He mumbles.

               “What?”

               “He’s going to kill us!” and with that they both desperately take off running back to their small village.

               Moo Myung peaks around the corner of a doorway of a hut and lets out a breath of relief that the owner isn’t home. The boys, still panting from their run, rush over to a pot full of water. Mak Moon chugs some water before handing the gourd scoop over to Moo Myung. The boy barely gets a full swallow in before and arrow whips passed his face and plants itself into the side of the hut. He chokes and sputters on the water as he turns towards his “attacker”, a surly old man with a bow.

               “You almost killed me!”

               “How many times do I have to tell you not to fight? No one would take you in, but I took on that burden and this is what I get in return!” the old man scolds.

               “We know, you’ve been saying the same stuff for ten years!” Moo Myung yells back, though he is more annoyed than angry.

               “Well then you should also know that if there isn’t enough gold then the villagers will get beaten up?”

               “I do. But there is a reason I don’t---”

               “Oh, did you have a reason for getting into a fight?” the old man asks sarcastically as he draws back another arrow. Moo Myung, seeing how there was no way he could talk his way out of this, begins to run. The old man sighs before release the blunted arrow and hitting the boy square in the head knocking him out cold. Mak Moon winces in sympathy but doesn’t dare move.

               Later two riders approach the capital gates in the dead of night, both have their faces covered up to their eyes. They are met at the gate by the Queen’s right-hand man. The man brought no other witnesses and the younger of the two riders nods his head both in greeting and in thanks. The boy is the young king and he did not approve of his mother’s order to have anyone, outside of a small group of people, who knew his identity and saw his face to be immediately killed. She may reason that it is for his safety and he knows he can’t stop the loyal guard from carrying out the order, but he will be damned if he doesn’t put in the effort to prevent it from happening when he can.

               At that same moment Moo Myung and Mak Moon are scaling up a rope on the outer wall of the capital. Moo Myung makes it over the wall first and, after catching his breath, looks around to figure out what to do next. His breath catches in his throat as he spots the dangling heads of other peasants who had illegally entered the capital. He quickly turns back to Mak Moon as he clambers over the ledge behind him telling him to breath before looking around. Mak Moon does not take the horror of the decapitated rotting heads well and screams. Moo Myung is quick to cover his mouth and get them moving after that. They manage to steal some clothes from a wash line before most the city is awake. They couldn’t help but flaunt around in their new clothes, they had never worn anything so nice. Now they just had to look through the entire capital city for the girl that had the necklace that matched with Mak Moon’s.

Elsewhere in the capital, a handsome young man sits at the edge of completely enamored crowd listening to a young woman tell a dramatic tale of murder and romance. He has a small smile on his face as he leans against a post and closes his eyes to better picture the story that is being spun. Well, that was his original intention but he ends up falling asleep and missing the entire conclusion of the tale. When he wakes he’s disappointed, to say the least, and he snags a passerby asking where he could find the story teller.

 Moo Myung and Mak Moon decide to try and go to the most popular places in the capital because the more people they scan the more likely Mak Moon would be able to recognize his little sister or that they could spot the beads of the necklace. Which leads to them wandering into a gambling house. They mosey around stopping at different games to inquire about the necklace.

 “Excuse me, do you know what shop sells this type of thing? Have you seen anyone else wearing this?” Mak Moon asks holding out his necklace. A man watching one of the games tells him about a shop that would sell special pieces and even gives him directions. Unfortunately, he has no idea what any of the directions mean and he stutters out more questions about the location of the store. His confusion is overheard at a nearby table by a man with a large scar on his face. The scar faced man smirks knowingly and immediately pegs Mak Moon as an outsider. Moo Myung, in the meantime, had gotten distracted by watching the game. His eyes are focused as he watches the dice being handled. The scar faced man is playing against another man, with a small girl clinging to him, who loses once again. Moo Myung’s gaze hardens as he realizes the game is rigged. The man begs for another chance, since he had just lost all his money. The scar faced man laughs scornfully and makes one of his goons bring a box to the table.

 “Sure, I’ll give you another chance,” he sneers and opens the box to reveal a severed head, “as long as you don’t mind putting your daughter’s pretty little head up as payment.” The people watching look away in disgust and start murmuring about the foolishness of the man. The man is in tears and begging for mercy offering his life in place of his child.  Moo Myung, silently seething, offers to take the man’s place and places his head as payment instead. He knew the scar faced man wouldn’t deny him, he had seen his type before, the type that doesn’t care who he gets to hurt or kill just if he gets to spill blood and flaunt his power. “I’ll take that bet! I’ll even give you all of my winnings from today if you beat me!”

 “I don’t need your dirty money; your head will be payment enough.” Moo Myung shoots back without missing a beat. All conversation dies down in an instant. The scar faced man’s knowing grin morphs into a sneer, but he still agrees to play. They make their calls and the dice are rolled in a cup, which is then flipped making a dull thud on the table. Before the result can be revealed, and the dice switched out, Moo Myung’s arm shoots out and he slams his hand down on top of the overturned cup. He starts to reveal the results while preventing the man from moving the dice but the scar faced man slams the cup back down. He’s shaking with anger, and a bit of fear, as he holds the cup down fighting against Moo Myung who is calmly trying lift it.

 “No one else has ever been able to do this, who are you?” the scar faced man asks through gritted teeth. Moo Myung grins slyly back at him.

 “Oh me? I’m Dog-bird.”

 The man’s eyes widen in recognition. He knows that name and the reputation that comes with it. Mak Moon speaks up from where he has been watching the whole conflict take place. “Stop trying to delay the results! Show the dice!” The scar faced man gives Moo Myung a shaky grin as he offers to let Moo Myung keep his head if he walks away now.  Moo Myung refuses the offer with a shake of his head.

 “Why are you so nervous sir? Do you somehow already know the result?” Dog-bird asks snidely. The man, as it turns out, isn’t much of a gambler. He flips the table over while ordering his men get Moo Myung and Mak Moon. Both boys run while overturning tables and shoving people out their way. They run out of the gambling house and split up with Moo Myung leading the man and his flunkies on a chase through the city. He climbs over carts in the road and climbs up on top of the roof of one of the many buildings. The men furiously following him.  He spots a large gap between two of the buildings and heads towards it, knowing that the morons chasing after him won’t be able to make the jump. He reaches the gap and launches himself across, smacking his chest against the edge of the rooftop and knocking the wind out of himself before hauling himself up. He runs to the other side of the roof and climbs down into a side street. Scar face and his men lose sight of him causing him to yell in frustration.

 Meanwhile the haggard old man from the jail cell has gotten cleaned up and dressed in robes marking him with importance. He is searching for someone that can help him complete his mission and finally get the queen to step down. He walks into a bustling teahouse filled with young lounging nobles. The owner is waltzing around and fanning himself with the perfect service smile on his face while checking on his patrons.

 “Hwa-gong!” the shop owner exclaims spotting the other man, “I haven’t seen you ages!” Hwa-gong gives him a small smile while still taking in the shop.

 “You’ve been busy while I have been away. Who would have thought that the incompetent Pi Joo Ki would become such a successful business man.” Hwa-gong says with a chuckle.

 “If you’re so impressed with one shop wait until you visit the others!” Joo ki says with pride. He leads Hwa-gong to table in the back so they can talk. “So what brings you here? This isn’t the type of place you would normally choose to frequent.”

 “It’s urgent.” Hwa-gong says, his mood changing into one of complete solemnity, “I’m looking for something special, something that only you could provide me.” Joo Ki looks shocked for a moment before giving Hwa-gong a dirty grin.

 “Getting all needy for a woman in your age?” Jooki asks suggestively. He receives a blank look in response.

 “No.” Hwa-gong says patiently, “I am asking you to find me young beautiful men.”

 “Oh. Was that time away to do some self-reflection?” Jooki says, eyebrows raised in revelation, “I mean, usually people figure or try this out when they are younger but to each his own.” Hwa-gong lets out a sigh, realizing that he probably should have worded that better.

 After explaining the situation more fully Jooki takes him to his most popular shop in the city called Daiseo. He made a special room in the back that worked as both an office and a hidden viewing spot to watch the goings on in his shop, which he graciously offers as an incognito base of operation to Hwa-gong.

 In a different part of town, the pretty girl who tells stories is having an argument with a wine merchant. He owes her three months’ pay and she is not going to take no as an answer.

 “Miss Ahro, please explain to me how it makes sense to pay a thief?” the stall owner asks the girl condescendingly.

 “Why are you lying just so you don’t have to pay me? Is business really that bad?” Ahro shoots back. “I could spread the word that you like to rip people off or you could just pay me what you owe.”

 “Act as highborn as you want girl. It doesn’t matter that your father is of noble birth, your mother was lowborn and you are nothing but a lowborn half breed because of it.” The man sneers. Ahro is fuming as her eyes dart around the stall only to settle onto the jars of his finest wine.

 “Fine. You don’t want to pay me or treat me right that’s your choice. I wasn’t going to keep working for you anyways but now you’ve given me reason to at least live up to your lies.” She smirks raising her hand and pointing towards the jars of wine. “I think a jar per month should suffice.” She then grabs one of the jars, opens it, tips it back like she going to chug the jug, only to dump it in the dirt and drop the pot shattering it. The man stares at her in utter shock as he watches her do it again only this time she doesn’t put up the front of drinking it, she just chucks it out into the middle of the street startling some people walking by. Ahro then grabs the last jug, glares pointedly at the merchant, and then turns sharply and stomps away.

 She trudges back to her home at a slow pace, there is only so fast anger can take you when lugging around a clay pot full of alcohol. Her entire being gives off an aura for people to bug off, eyes narrowed and scanning the crowd. She spots a stand being pilfered by some kids and huffs in annoyance as she plops the jar of alcohol on the ground before going over to scold the children. The children don’t even have the mind to look ashamed and they giggle as they run off, most of them clumsily dropping the small trinkets they were trying to steal. Ahro rolls her eyes good naturedly and turns around to go retrieve the pot only to see a man picking it up and starting to make off with it.  Not having any of it, she slips off her shoes and starts running after the man. She hurtles a single shoe through the crowd of people, hoping to at least make him slow down for a moment, only for it smack into the head of a boy wandering through. Embarrassed and annoyed that she missed her target she doesn’t realize that she is going too fast to stop as she all but tackles the boy. They land in an ungraceful heap on the dirt road. He groans as she pushes off his chest to prop herself up to look for her wine thief but there is no sign of the man.

 “Seriously!? Even when I am getting rightful retribution this stupid kingdom can’t even allow me that!” Ahro complains. She makes a noise of frustration before fully comprehending that she is laying on top of someone in the middle of a busy road. She looks down and gives a stuttered apology. The boy she knocked over is handsome even with the dopey confused look on his face. He mumbles that he’s okay, head turning this way and that until he spots her shoe. He hands it back to her as they pick themselves up out of the dirt.

 “Well, um, good day.” The boy says with a nod and speed walks away. Ahro tilts her head in confusion before wondering back to her home.

 She walks through the gateway into her home laying down on the raised platform in the center of the small courtyard. She’s tired and annoyed and wants to complain to somebody but there’s noise coming out of the spare room used for patients. It sounds as if her dad is talking to the man he enlisted to find her brother and mother. It has been ten years since they were forced to leave the capital and every day the hope of ever finding them diminishes a little bit more. Ahro decides to take a nap while waiting for her father, she needed the rest anyways because she must go to Okta tonight and entertain the “innocent” high born girls with a story.

 The young man who was listening to her story in the square is now dressed in royal robes and standing in the throne room of the palace glaring at the throne. The queen regent comes into the room through the door behind him, an air of anger and fear swirling around her.

 “Sam Maek Jong why have you come here? After all I have done to protect you and you just throw it all away!” She doesn’t yell, but her voice is growing louder the more she talks. “Do you not trust me anymore? You being here is extremely problematic, it will only arouse suspicion in the lords.”

 “Isn’t it strange that I am not here though?” the young king asks back calmly. “I am the king after all. This city and country are mine to watch over. I should be here to do that.” He turns around to face his mother.

 “It’s still not safe for you here. There are still too many enemies in the capital willing to use or kill you.” She retorts. He lets out a frustrated sigh calming himself before he replies.

 “It will never be absolutely safe for me. Getting rid of all the throne’s possible enemies is a non-starter. I don’t want to forcefully take the throne from you mother, I don’t want to start a civil war, but it’s hard to see the reasons you are giving me as proper validation for keeping me from taking my rightful place on the throne.”

 “You are still a child. It is my decision to put you on this throne when I see fit, whether you trust me or not.” She spits back. “For now, just live as if you are dead.”

 Maek Jong lets out a frustrated breath through his nose before he stalks out of throne room. His guard and companion, Paoh, joins him as he walks to a different room to change into lower rank robes.

 He spends a good deal of the night closed off in his own thoughts, trying to figure out if his mother’s claims about his safety are legitimate. He stares down resentfully at the jade dragon bracelet on his wrist that identifies him as King Jinhueng.  He has the title and birthright of a king but none of the abilities or powers and he is bitter.

 Mak Moon is coincidently right outside the courtyard of the room where the young king is staying. He’s whispering loudly for Moo Myung trying to locate his friend so they can find somewhere to rest for the night. It is then that he spots a figure, dressed completely in black and armed with a sword, sneak over the wall and into the nearest building.

 The black clad man slides into the room while drawing his sword. He takes soft steps towards the sleeping body on the other side of the room.  When he is right next to the mat he stabs into sleeping man’s form and lets out a shaky breath as he withdraws his blade.

 “You know, if you want to kill someone in their sleep you should learn to be quieter.” Maek Jong says equal parts amused and disappointed. The would-be assassin whirls around taken by surprise and wildly starts lunging and slicing his sword through the air. “You’re not formally trained,” The king observes while dodging the clumsy attacks. “Honestly that sword is so beat up I am surprised it even stabbed through the cushions.” He throws a punch into the other man’s stomach causing him gasp. Maekjong grabs his opponent’s arms twisting them in a way contorts them behind his back. He grimaces as he smells the heavy sent of alcohol on the other man. “You’ve never killed before, have you? You had to drink to even gain the courage to do this.” He twists the man’s arms up even more tightly making him groan in pain. “So, let’s hear it. How much is my life worth?”

 “Three bags.” The man whines out. Maekjong chuckles but it’s humorless. This man must be insanely desperate.

 “My life is only worth three lousy bags of rice.” He murmurs to himself. “Paoh! We have a slight problem!” he yells out to is guard. He turns towards the door as it opens only to feel his heart drop into his stomach. His mother’s most loyal and trusted guard, Hyun Chu, had entered the room instead. He hadn’t seen him since the night he was escorted through the city gate. “Wait! He doesn’t even know who I am, you don’t need to do this!” he tries to explain. He let go of the man quietly whispering, “run.” It’s a miniscule hope that the man would escape. He’s too shocked to listen, stumbling backwards as guard advances towards him and crying out for mercy only to be dispatched within seconds. Maekjong stares at the now lifeless man in shock but soon turns his gaze on Hyun Chu in anger. He storms out of his rooms, he needs air and it now smells like blood in his sleeping quarters. He is enraged that Hyun Chu must follow his mother’s orders and not his own. He is king but he can’t even save the life of one of his subjects.

 Mak Moon had heard the commotion and was waiting to move after it had quieted down. He walks past the opening to the courtyard just as Maekjong has stormed down to the bottom of the stairs. Mak Moon freezes unsure whether he should run to avoid being called out for trespassing or if sprinting off would just make him seem more suspicious. Maekjong is surprised as well, no one is usually near this part of the city at this hour, and he stops to look at the other boy in confusion. Meanwhile, Hyun Chu had caught up with him by rushing down the steps after him.

 “Your Majesty, you cannot go out at night unaccompanied!” he scolds. Maekjong’s figure stiffens as Mak Moon’s eyes widen in realization. Not again, Maekjong thinks desperately. He turns around and tries to obscure the other boy’s figure from Hyun Chu’s view, but he wasn’t quick enough. He throws out his arms and stands in Hyun Chu’s way while yelling at the other boy to run away. Mak Moon is woken from his shock at seeing the king, now realizing he is in danger, and takes off running.  He sees Moo Myung coming down the road and sprints towards him terrified, he quickly grabs him and drags them to hide behind a wall flattening them onto the ground. Hyun Chu tries to step around Maekjong but the boy steps in front of him continuing to block his path. The king looks determined and Hyun Chu at least has some decency to look apologetic before bumping him out of the way and running towards his horse. He quickly mounts and kicks the horse into a gallop out of the gate and down the dirt road after the boy. He gallops past the wall the boys are hiding behind, thinking the boy would be too scared to have the wits to hide. Mak Moon lets out the breath he was holding taking in deep heaving breaths after the run and the scare.

 “I just saw the king.” He said in awe.

 “What?” Moo Myung asks incredulously. “No you didn’t. Why would the king be outside of the palace?” Moo Myung didn’t want to think about what it would mean for them both if he had actually seen the king.

 “It had to have been him! He was everything a king should be; handsome, brave, and righteous.” Mak Moon gushes.

 “How righteous can he be if he sent that guard after you?” Moo Myung asks flatly.

 “But he didn’t! He got in his way and stopped him from chasing me.” Mak Moon defends. His friend looks back at him stunned. Moo Myung looks down and twiddles with his fingers. He’s silently thankful to the young noble man for helping to protect the only family he had. He picks himself up off the ground and offers a hand out to Mak moon.

 “Come on we should find somewhere to sleep, I don’t think we should keep searching tonight.” They find a stable close by and they settle down on the hay in the back corner out of sight of the entry way. “give me your necklace.” Moo Myung demands nonchalantly.

 “What? Why?”

 “You’re too easily recognizable with your stupid long legs so I’ll go out tomorrow and keep asking around while you lay low.” Moo Myung explained, “anyways, if your dad is ranked high enough finding him will help you get absolved of any charges you could have against you.”

 “He will do more than that,” Mak Moon said with a grin, “he’ll get you a citizen pass for the city and take you in too. I just know it.” Moo Myung grins back with a warm feeling in his chest. They go to sleep with the picture of a content future together in their minds.

 Moo Myung spends the next day wandering from shop to shop inquiring about the necklace, but he finds next to nothing besides one eccentric shop keeper saying it looked familiar.

 Mak Moon, after begging and annoying Moo Myung to his wits end, goes out during the night to continue his search. At least there is less of a chance for him to be recognized in the darkness of the night. He notices a strange domed building with lots of young people entering and leaving and figures he might be able to dig up some information there. He skims the crowd as he goes towards the entrance trying to figure out how people get through the bouncers. But then his eyes catch on a girl. She’s pretty and smiling as her finer dressed companion escorts her through the entrance. It’s not her face that caught his attention though, but the beaded necklace that she wears that looks exactly the same as his own. He stares with his mouth slightly open in utter shock. That was his little sister. She grew up so well and pretty, just like I knew she would, he thinks fondly. He closes his mouth and his face sets into a look of determination, he will get into this building, and he will reunite with his family. Ten years of separation about to be over and the bouncers refuse to let him through the door.

 Inside the building young beautiful nobles are enjoy drinks, music, dancing, and other forms of entertainment. Excited squeals and giggles interrupt the atmosphere as the crowd parts and a handsome young man leads his entourage into the club. He looks indifferent as he walks through the crowd of people complimenting his looks, skills, and family lineage. His three companions, on the other hand, are soaking in the attention they garner.

 “Banryu you’re so handsome!”

 “I love his cool demeanor! He looks so sophisticated.”

 “I feel like my eyes have been blessed!”

 Banryu waits until he walked through the mob before allowing himself a small satisfied smile. It disappears a moment later when another shout breaks through the crowd.

 “It’s Sooho! Sooho is here!”

 Another young man enters with his own group of friends, this time he is openly basking in the attention, compliments and swooning. His flaunting walk comes to a halt when he spots Banryu and his peons.

 “So much for having a good time.” Sooho says with a snicker. “What are you doing here Banryu?”

 “I wasn’t aware they were letting in immature morons tonight, otherwise I wouldn’t have bothered to come.” Banryu replies sounding bored, though the look in his eyes means he is annoyed. Sooho tenses up eyes flaming.

 “I can’t stand this cold atmosphere! This always happens when Banryu bothers Sooho just because he is better.” A random boy whines. Sooho’s demeanor melts into one of pure cockiness.

 “You heard him. You can spoil the mood all you want but I won’t let you stop me from enjoying myself.” Banryu and Sooho glare at each other for several more moments before Banryu rolls his eyes and walks towards the private room he reserved.  He doesn’t feel like fighting tonight.

 Ahro had been escorted to another private room full of excited young women and girls. This is one of her favorite jobs, when she gets to entrance and captivate an audience with a story. Even if some of the audience is hidden. She knows some of the boys like to reserve the rooms around this one not only for privacy but also because they can listen in.

 Sooho and friends are such a group. All of them leaning with ears pressed against the wall to hear every word. All of them trying to put on a façade of experience while blushing, giggling, and gasping at the details of Ahro’s story. The young king is also listening in, but he is brooding over his barely touched cup of alcohol. He came to Okta to cool down and maybe plan his next move. It was a pleasant surprise that he had run into the story teller again, even if she was telling a different story.  Banryu and his companions are listening in as well, though he seems intent on looking disinterested as they get drunk off wine. One of his companions is starting to get too cocky, he’s drunk and loud, sarcastically acting like he is interested in Ahro. The others chuckle at his antics and notice that they need more alcohol but Banryu just sighs quietly.

 “Kang Seong you go get it. You need remember your place.” He says.

 “What? Banryu why- “the other boy starts to stutter.

                 “Do not forget that your father, and therefore you, has the lowest rank out of all of us. We allow you to be around us, do not forget that.” The chuckling had stopped and the others are now looking away from the lower ranked boy. Seong is fuming and looks like he wants to argue back, but instead chooses to stomp off to do what was demanded of him.

 Mak Moon, meanwhile, had snuck in the back entrance and was scanning the crowd and peeking into rooms looking for his sister. He finds the room full of young women and spots Ahro telling her story. He can see the necklace more clearly now and he knows it matches his own. He tries waving his arms and calling over to get her attention. Instead he ends up smacking a tray of alcohol out of someone’s hand. He tenses up, knowing he just drew the wrong kind of attention towards himself, and turns around quickly to apologize. It’s bad luck that he just upset the boy Banryu had insulted. He was looking for something to take out is anger on and now he found the perfect target.

 “Are you serious? Do you know who I am?” the seething boy shouts as he backs Mak Moon up against the wall, “Well how are you going to make this up to me? Judging by your clothes you won’t be able to pay me back with money.” Mak Moon tries to shove his way past the boy but is shoved back into the wall before being punched in the gut. He sinks down to kneel on floor and wrap his arms around his stomach. The other boy grabs Mak Moon by his hair and drags him to the center of the main room where he then continues to hit and kick at him.

 The commotion of the fight had drawn the attention of everyone in the building causing the crowd to grow and the heckling to get louder. The girls in the room where Ahro was telling her story rushed out to watch the fight, fanning themselves at the idea of “men in combat”. Sooho and his companions storm out of their private room to see what had interrupted them when the story was getting to the best part. Banryu and he entourage, who had heard who was causing the noise, came out to see what nonsense their comrade had caused. The young king, however, did not go to see the fight. He just sighed and resigned himself to once again not hearing the end to another story. He gets up and opens the door to his room to leave while everyone is distracted, but is surprised to see one remaining girl still in the private room angrily muttering to herself.

 “Um…excuse me?” He asks.

 “What?” the girl replies moodily not looking in his direction.

 “Were you telling the story?”

 “…yeah.”

 “Could you finish it please?” he asks earnestly, “I’ll even pay you.” He reaches into the small bag tied to his waste and pulled out some silver pieces. The girl turns and finally looks at his face and blushes. The boy is handsome and is treating her kindly, he honestly reminds her of a small dog begging for a treat, so she decides to humor him. “Actually, you were telling a story the other day in front of a shop, it was about a murder romance I believe, I didn’t get to hear the end of that one either… could you finish that one instead?” Ahro was surprised and a little relieved that the boy wasn’t a pervert. Most people when they come to Okta want to hear nothing but the “scandalous” and it is refreshing to run into someone who is more interested in the non-traditional stories she likes to tell.  

 In the main room Mak Moon lays beaten on the floor in middle of a circle of people. Seong is now drunk off both the alcohol and his power over the other. He is walking around the other’s curled up body with a sword now. He turns to Banryu and asks excitedly if it’s okay for him to kill Mak Moon. He is just a peasant without proper papers after all, worth less than dirt, and he would be executed anyways.

 “You’re not actually going to let him do this?” Sooho scoffs, “I know you’re disloyal garbage Banryu, but I also know you’re not an idiot.” He is acting nonchalant but there is an edge to his words. There will be a bigger brawl if the peasant boy fatally harmed. Sooho may be a true bone but he picks his companions based on shared beliefs, interests, and skills; he wants them to be his friends not tools. Banryu, on the other hand, picks to surround himself with people that he knows he will be able to use.  

 There is always tension between the two groups, it has been this way since they were small and their parents told them not to play together, anything could trigger them to get into a fight. Many believe they would grow up to be bitter rivals in the royal court much like their fathers, Sooho would be blindly loyal to the royal family while Banryu would be ready to usurp at a moment’s notice.

 Banryu does nothing as he watches the boy lift his sword and prepare to strike. Suddenly, an object comes hurtling through the air and collides with the boy’s face. He curses and brings the hand clutching the sword down to rub at his forehead his gaze angrily turning towards the offending projectile; a fourteen-sided die.

 “Who threw that?” He snarls while taking a menacing step towards the crowd.

 “It was me,” Comes the calm reply and the crowd parts to reveal Moo Myung, “I’m sorry I just really don’t like watching spoiled nobles acting like they’re hot shit.”

 “Who the hell do you think you are?”

 “You don’t need or deserve to know.” Moo Myung snaps as he walks over and kneels at Mak Moon’s side. “Are you alright?” He asks softly helping him sit up and move away from his assailant.

 “Yeah, it’s nothing I can’t take.” He answers breathily while giving him a grateful and pained smile.

 “Well I’m not alright.” He stands and faces the now severely pissed off Seong. The other boy had recovered from the hit and, now even further embarrassed, charges and slashes at his new opponent. Moo Myung easily side steps the blow, grabs the boy’s sword hand, and twists it forcing the sword to drop to the floor. The boy yelps in pain and cradles his wrist while stepping away from Moo Myung as he scoops up the weapon. The surrounding crowd lets out a mix of surprised and impressed shouts.

 “Not bad, I like this guy.” Sooho chuckles. Even Banryu raises an eyebrow in interest, impressed by the stranger’s skill. Moo Myung lets the tip of the blade touch the wooden floor before spinning around and carving a circular boarder around himself.

 “Since it’s not against the law for a spoiled brat to murder someone because of their rank, then it’s my own personal law that I get to beat up any aristocrat that crosses this line.” Moo Myung smirks as he accusingly points the sword towards the crowd. “So, Who’s First?”

[purple-petrichor]

NagisaxYuuji Valentine’s Day headcanon masterpost

Okay so I ship these two way too much, but didn’t have enough time to do much for them this year, so I at least wanted to get these ideas out there for others to look at:

--After mistaking Nagisa for a girl, Yuuji is very cautious about avoiding any such implications ever again. Therefore, for them, Valentine’s becomes a mostly mutual affair—that’s how it’s done in other countries abroad, plus it’s just more convenient. However, for their very first Valentine’s Day when they were kids, Yuuji purchased and gave some chocolate to Nagisa, voluntarily putting himself in the more “girlfriend” role. Nagisa was so amused by it that Yuuji resolved to hand-make the gift next time for an even more meaningful gesture.

--Yuuji’s a rich kid, so imagine what he could do with those kinds of resources. I’m talking chocolates from abroad, exotic and custom-ordered bouquets, trips to New York for Valentine’s Weekend, or taking Nagisa to a play or the ballet as a treat (Nagisa’s from a more humble background so these are really infrequent, but still, killer Valentine’s gifts). But imagine that one year Yuuji gets caught off-guard. The big day is almost here, Feb. 14th, and he hasn’t bought or prepared anything yet-

...so he hurries Nagisa out of the house. Tells him to go shopping for something they need. Nagisa, since it’s Valentine’s Day, cheekily offers for them to go together. Yuuji turns up his nose and insists that he’s busy, sorry, and all but forces Nagisa out the door. Of course, this makes Nagisa rather annoyed, and very dejected because it’s Valentine’s Day, aren’t they supposed to be there for each other as a couple? But he goes off to do the shopping.

When Nagisa comes back, he’s in a bad mood. Honestly, if Yuuji wants to be that way that’s fine, but on today of all days Nagisa really thought he’d- wait a minute.

Nagisa gets in the door and notices that the house is quiet. All too quiet and still. His assassin-trained instincts almost scream danger before he notices the trail of rose petals on the ground. The red-and-pink petals trail off down the hall and form an undeniable line leading back towards the bedrooms.

His first reaction is exasperation. Nagisa lets the grocery bags slide to the ground, slipping off of his shoulder. Oh, come on. Really? Well, now Nagisa knows what all that was about earlier. Yuuji had wanted to get him out of the house for some Valentine’s gift prepping time.

But that’s not enough. Nagisa walks on down the hall, grumbling to himself. He is not in the mood. This is not a romantic gesture. If Yuuji thinks that a few kisses and a red carpet of roses is going to clear up how he made Nagisa feel earlier, that man is dead wrong. Oh god, are these petals trailing directly up to Yuuji’s room? Nagisa swears to himself for a moment. He better not find Yuuji tied up on his own bed, trussed up as some sort of awful ‘gift’ to Nagisa for today…

But that’s not where the petals are leading. They stop at the door to Nagisa’s room instead.

Nagisa stops for a moment and stares at the threshold in confusion. What in the world?

He turns the doorknob, steps into his own room and immediately his nose is awash in scent.

His room is covered in flowers. Every surface—the desk, the chair, even the bed has a hasty tarp thrown over it in order to protect it from the bunches, the buckets, the streamers of roses spread out everywhere. There’s hardly a free space to be seen. Everything is red, white, pink, purple, and smells so sweet that Nagisa is certain it’ll be soaked into the walls for ages.

Behind him, while Nagisa’s still standing speechless, Yuuji shuffles into view. He moves through the doorway looking like someone who’s just kicked a puppy, with his hands in his pockets, gaze downcast. “So, Valentine’s Day kinda snuck up on me this year,” he confesses. “I couldn’t think of anything, and I’ve used most of my gift ideas by now, so….I was left with all the cheesy options.”

He smiles, unsure. “But if I make up for it by doing something more cheesy than anything else, do you think that would sorta cancel it all out?”

Nagisa turns to him, blinking with wide eyes. He doesn’t know how, but this somehow managed to shock all of the anger out of him. “I…Yuuji…” he manages. Now everything falls into place—Yuuji had rushed him out of the house, must have accepted the arrival of a delivery van, transferred hundreds, literally hundreds of vases of roses into his room, set up tarps and other supplies in order to collect the water from buckets and leave things clean, then signed for payment and dismissed the van just in time before Nagisa came back home.

“How expensive was this?” Nagisa says, waving a weak hand toward the room. “There must be thousands of flowers here…”

Yuuji shrugs. “Dun’ worry about it. Happy Valentine’s Day.”

“…Yuuji.”

“Yes?”

“I LOVE YOU BUT WHERE THE HECK ARE WE SUPPOSED TO PUT ALL OF THESE?”

Nagisa’s room smells of roses for two whole days afterward.

--Yuuji asking after he gets home from work one year, before they officially start their celebration, “What do I get? Chocolate?”

“No. A kiss,” Nagisa says, puckering his lips just to tease.

Yuuji replies without any hesitation, “Oh, excellent. My favorite flavor!”

Nagisa blushes so hard that the tint is still on his face ten minutes later as he chases Yuuji around the house with a pillow, trying to whack the grin off of Yuuji’s face.

--Imagine Yuuji making playlists, learning how to compile songs and maybe even how to burn them to CDs in order to present them to Nagisa as a Valentine’s gift. (All while taking great care to use songs which have gender-neutral language, and aren’t feminizing) It never fails to impress Nagisa just how many songs Yuuji manages to get.

--Yuuji putting his food-tasting skills to great use—as it turns out, he might be incredible at critiquing, but he’s a horrible cook. However, he can at least taste-test ingredients and shop around for the best, most high-quality sweets in all of Japan. While he might not present Nagisa with something hand-made every Valentine’s Day, he always gives something hand-chosen, and coming from Yuuji Norita’s tastebuds, that signifies a lot.

--Okay so even though I just said their exchange is mutual, Yuuji still likes to shake things up every once in a while and do something special for Nagisa (see above). Therefore, on those years, Yuuji insists that Nagisa doesn’t have to pay him back on White Day, and ‘why would I even want something for White Day I’m not a girl Nagisa honestly geez you don’t have to get me anything in return’ but Nagisa. Always. Does. It might not be the traditional three-times-as-expensive kind of thing, but as it turns out, Yuuji happens to naturally like the usual cookies-and-gummies-and-marshmallows stuff that’s normally given as White Day gifts.

‘Dude I said you didn’t have to pay me back what the hell I meant that when I said it I’m not your girlfriend or anything haha why would you do this Nagisa I told you I don’t want it,’ Yuuji says as he shovels all the candy into his mouth.