#i rlly need help but otherwise i'm good

[sepiasys]

I'm so scares of the volunteer roles due to lack of confidence 🫠

So the food serving thingy has two roles: cooking/prepping food, and writing orders and keeping track of who got food.

The first I'm not very confident in but would like to try eventually. The second one is compared to another kind of volunteer role, which is greeting ppls at the food bank and maybe serving stuff if requested and just helping ppl out in front of the building/outside. It says strong customer service skills are necessary for the role as well as being able to work with a diverse amount of ppl 🥺

And I would wanna do that if it's similar to the other one if it'll help me out, since the food serving thing is only two other ppl helping out the manager. But I have no experience with customer service and my social skills are SHOT! Also de-escalation and understanding of trauma are mentioned as helpful for the role 🥲 Idk if I'm good with de-escalation, best I could do was my family and even then they RLLY liked to NOT LISTEN to me when I gave em advice to calm down (like separating physically while they were both pissed off--I swear mom was rlly immature about it when I was trying to help my bro because HE IS A CHILD!!). And trauma. I mean I have *experience* but do I know how to handle **others** with trauma? No, no not rlly 🥲

Hhhhhh telling myself I just need to jump into it. Doesn't help that I watched a bartending video thing. Sink or swim. I'm so scared of sinking ;-; I'm scared of if they see me as pathetic and useless despite it being a volunteer thing!!

Fuck I just need to like. Work on the days that they're not serving ppl, not open to the public. So 3 specific days. And then I need to go from that to working on days that ARE busy, but I'm still not interacting with the public public yet. And then I need to ease into working with the public via the front of house roles. And then I can do whatever I want at that point ig-

God I want to start doing stuff now but I can't because I haven't been told if I need to do anything specific 🥺 I have shifts scheduled for after the event, bc it's in a week, and that's for the one role I feel like is probably rlly easy? Probably? And I just. Hhhh. The most info I have actually comes from a training video for a semi-unrelated role, bc it shows what I assume is made/left by the role I signed up for?

Hhhhh a lot. A lot is going on rn. A lot of serious planning and preparation and I'm trying really hard to not be a tight little ball of rubber bands (incredibly stressed out) about it. But it's hard not to. Especially when half of my stress comes from my roommate(s).

Fuck I just. Need to wait. Because that's what EVERYONE says. That things take time. I just need to wait for the time to do these things. Wait.

As if that hasn't been detrimental to me my entire life.

[dontbesoweirdkira]

What if... Batsis with a oral fixation ⁉️

Not in a kinky way but like a stimming way, I have autism irl and I chew and bite on stuff to help get some feelings I'm not a fan of :P

Also I bite people I trust cuz Ik they won't mind or rlly judge me for it so what if batsis bites Grayson cuz she trusts him or somethin 🤯⁉️

A/N: So babes...i'm sorry this took a while. I was out of it for a while...I cannot stop biting my loved ones either...it's rough out here, really.

Characters: Dick, Tim, and Jason

Masterlist

Requests: always open

Dick wouldn't really mind it, I don't think?

Maybe at first he's like..."what ya got there..?" and it's just a whole chunk of his arm in your mouth.

He has a look of both concern and amusement on his face because well...this is a first.. But if he's aware of your usual oral stims and how you are constantly chewing or biting at something, I think he wouldn't question it further. It's easy to put two and two together, y'know.

But the fact that you only do it to him and maybe to the other siblings is enough for him to be okay with it. It makes Dick feel extremely special and dare I say honored to be a human chew toy. Dick adores anything that you do, especially if that thing is specifically because you trust him.

I think it'd be super cute having you hold onto his arm while ya'll are chilling on the couch. Maybe watching a scary movie, and because you're getting stressed so the entire time you are just gnawing on his bicep...poor guy. Lol but he actually doesn't even notice it after a while of you constantly doing it.

Like he's chatting with Babs and here comes your evil little teeth all ready to sink into his skin.

The only time I think he's be against it if he's super sweaty and gross or is trying to concentrate on something important....otherwise,,go ham.

But would I be crazy if I say his hair when it's long is perfectly chew-able.... like pleassseeeeee rachellll give it to meeee

I can imagine him giving you some of his bracelets to chew on. I imagine he wears these string bracelets and they are perfect chewing material.

*you have almost bit his entire finger off...*

Jason would be a bit turned off from it.

He's not particularly keen on you biting him. It doesn't feel good, it maybe even a bit irritating or stressful for him. This is not to say he thinks that your fixation needs to go but he'd rather you do it to anyone else instead.

Maybe he'll give you one of his old jackets for you to chew on. it's perfect, he got it cleaned and it has tons of tabs and buckles for you to chew. That way you can still have something of his to fixate on without necessarily bothering him. It does kind of warms his heart when you choose his items to stim with tho. It's assuring that he's still able to help ground you even if it's in a different way....

Tim..does not care. Like the most he does is just give you a strange look, then goes back to whatever he was doing prior.

You aren't hurting him, nor is he irritated so who is he to force you to stop. It's clear that you are overwhelmed and needs something that'll help you make it through soo have fun, sis.

He never directly addresses it either. It's just a thing that he accepts.

Maybe if you are chewing on the him of his shirt and your saliva is causing it to get rather wet and slightly uncomfortable, he'll just go change the shirt and give it to continue doing your stimming with.

I feel like Tim just had random chew-able trinkets around his room too, maybe even keeps tough gummies or lollipops around as an alternative for you.

[aziraphales-library]

I love your blog sm it’s been VERY helpful for me to find Fics! Do u have any smut Fics with bottom Azi and top cro that involves their first time together? Also maybe crying and/or rlly sweet aftercare?

Here are some first time fics with top Crowley/bottom Aziraphale...

A Healthy Appetite by INeedABurnerAccountOkay (E)

Crowley blames himself, really. He was the one who had tempted the angel in the first place. With the first taste of that ox, he’d created a monster. An angelic monster with a heavy appetite and a fondness for all things human. So, it really shouldn’t have come as such as a shock, when Aziraphale asked him to stave off his hunger for something quite different.

the desire and pursuit of the whole by unsinkablesammy (E)

After their respective trials, Aziraphale goes back to Crowley's flat and sees something he wasn't supposed to. Confessions and romance ensue.

Oh Dear Salvation by myfairstarlight (E)

1941. West End London. Their Arrangement has been discovered by an agent of Hell and when the sun rises, consequences will have to be faced. But not tonight, Crowley decides as he finally breaks and gives in to temptation, tonight they’re together, and if tomorrow may not be guaranteed anymore then he’d rather have a taste of his angel at last before they both meet their demise. “Angel,” he calls, hands reaching for the boa around Aziraphale’s shoulders and pulling him down on the sofa, “changed my mind, what was it you said about doing something in return for me?”

The Wrong Thing by SuspiciousCharacter1895 (E)

“We’ve played every game humanity’s ever invented, haven’t we?” They had indeed played quite a variety of board games, card games, word games, et cetera. Crowley had drawn the line somewhere around charades. “We haven’t played Truth or Dare,” Aziraphale said with unnecessary dramatic emphasis. Crowley took a moment to gauge whether or not Aziraphale was serious. It appeared that he was. “Come off it.” “What’s wrong with Truth or Dare?” Aziraphale asked innocently. “That’s barely a game.” “The magazine said it was a good way to ‘introduce novelty and fun, and to initiate conversations that you might not have had otherwise,’” Aziraphale recited. That’s exactly why it’s a bad idea. Especially this many drinks in. .... During lockdown, Crowley and Aziraphale resort to Truth or Dare to alleviate the monotony. The truth may be dangerous but, as it turns out, may very well set them free.

You had me at "Crowley In a Lab Coat" by LaudaddySmitten (E)

With a start, Aziraphale realized he’d been blatantly staring at Crowley's throat and upper chest for heaven knows how long. Mortified, he snapped his eyes to Crowley's, which, uncovered, only further fueled his lust for the enticing botanist. Aziraphale was surprised to see that Crowley was sporting a smirk that looked…pleased. “Enjoying the view?” He arched an eyebrow in amusement. “Oh my, I er…..” Aziraphale gulped and looked down at his wringing hands. “How rude of me. I'm…ah, terribly sorry…” “Angel. Don’t apologize. I was actually…hoping you would.” Hands instantly stilled, Aziraphale looked up quickly. Had he heard that right? Crowley held Aziraphale's gaze and trailed fingertips in a circle on the lab counter. OR It's Crowley in a lab coat, do I need to say more? 😉 (Mind the tags)

how you've haunted me by sunrisesinthesuburbs (E)

Aziraphale loves because he's an angel and wants more because he's Aziraphale. or; picture this: an angel and a demon (though it doesn't matter much, nowadays) move in together and assume many things about one another. This is how it goes.

- Mod D

[gogolstoelicker]

Dorm leaders with a Razor!MC

a/n: totally lost the pookie who asked for this but if by some miracle yk its you, pls dont beat me up for taking so long </3 /j

also if tumblr did smth weird with the bullet points again, point ur guns at the app

its one week before my exams so im using my adrealine for smth!!

You are generally good-natured person who considers your wolf pack your family and becomes enraged if they are hurt by other parties. You love your wolf family but dislike the fact that you aren't fully like them. You considered the few humans you do encounter to be your friends and are willing to protect them from danger if it means sacrificing your and your pack's dinner for the night. You are a quick thinker. You are also honest and forthright due to your limited exposure to human life. You are not used to speaking and only speak in short phrases and words, finding it troublesome, but you continue nonetheless.

Riddle

my mans stopping you like this to take a look at your uniform

pookie, youre a lil messy rn -he said this in anger, I'm just giving you the nicer version

its ok, he helped you clean up a lil after!!

u absolutely trying not to mess up the collar and tie up bcs its so uncomfortable:😢😔

it always goes back to the messy version as soon as hes out of sight or its half the day already

he wont find out (i lied he absolutely did)

he can always count on u to tell him the truth should your friends ever do smth bad

"broke. chair." while pointing at ace and deuece

they have tears in their eyes as riddle approach them

honestly some of ur behaviour makes him go⁉️

fr thought u were a beastman or smth

then found out youre just a human whos lived with wolves their whole life

FUCKEKEKE REMEMBER THAT TIME IN HIS OVERBLOT WHEN HE WAS TALKING ABT PARENTS

u being an orphan as he goes on with his speech: /JOKE

ace beats his ass up for u its ok

him trying to figure out how they didnt try to eat u🤔

he didnt try to stop u but that wont mean he wont go😅😅

ALSO eat ur veggies pls

hes chasing u around heartslabyul trying to make u eat a wee bit of carrots

Leona

"veggies:( bad:(" "so real"

^ur real time convo

whenever youre given food with veggies, u pass it off to leona

leona then pass it to ruggie who then muched it off

he absolutely told u to give ruggie any veggies btw (free food for the man‼️)

ruggie is forever happy to receive free food

he actually thought u were a beastman too because of your scent

"r u a jack kinnie?" he would ask (he didnt ask it like that)

turns out you just got raised by them

idk savanaclaw might be an ok? place for u? considering most of them r beastman there

like its not even surprising to see u practicing with them every morning anymore

ruggie dragged both u and leona by the collar to practice btw

"im all the way in ramshackle" leona surprise adopted u to savanaclaw, dont resist /J

u surprisingly get along well with him‼️‼️

leona acting like he doesnt care abt the youngsters👴🙄 (hes failing)

he totally didnt take a nap with you in his usual spots, no who did that?? pft not him

no he did NOT save u from accidentally getting hurt by your friend's troubles btw no

also, he did not mind that you do not talk much

the less words the better for him!! he encourages this (he got beat up later by the people who thinks otherwise)

Azul

youre so simple, azul actually had a great time

"pls sign this contract to save ur friends" "ok:)"

well youre homeless now (not rlly u have a home in savanaclaw)

yk those super villains laughing evilly everytime their plans r going so well?? thats azul

he didnt even need to put many efforts in trying to trick u, u just go thumbs up at him

he does not feel bad btw

he does not care if youre a beastman or not. a business opportunity is all you'll ever be to him

maybe a friend too but you'll need to unlock friendship level 10 for that

can wolves swim underwater, im sayign yes for plot reasons

anyways u came back from trying to get the painting(?) picture (?) like a wet dog

im saying nonsense rn i think i need sleep its almost 1am

he threw his head back 90° to laugh dramatically at how u reminded him of a wet dog

this is a joke, do not come for me

honestly he had to drag u away from the lounge once bcs u tried catching the fishes in the aquarium

"MF LEAVE MY FISHES TF ALONE IF U WANT TO LIVE" is what he wouldve said if hes not a professional businessman

he is a professional guys do not worry💯

honestly, he is pretty ? that you had trouble speaking

after finding out its bcs youve been isolated from the human things, he kind of goes🤔

the business in his head is controlling him before he can stop them😖🫣

would u like a potion from him to help u with that problem<33

honestly head empty rn

Kalim

rhey all thought you were a beastman and he is not an exception

is def surprised bcs ur ass howled one time at a full moon

he witnessed that, he had the front row seat as witness

he lets u do ur thing its ok

even asked u if its family tradition HELP /J

"oh man u have such fluffy hair"

he said before trying to touch it and realising its literally tangled all over

him and jamil whos right next to him

were u raised in a barn??

kalim assumed theres no hairbrush in ramshackle

u dont have to worry bro, kalim is more than happy to stock u up with some hairbrush

"oh its nothing much dont worry😊🙏‼️" the literal gold handles on the hairbrush:

u dont have to worry abt not speaking much, he speaks enough for the both of u

he spoke such strange things u dont understand him sometimes

u just nod along and gave him thumbs up

its like sun and moon but the moon is confused /j

if youre sleeping outside, he will join u btw

he brought his pillows and blanket out to have a small sleepover with u

jamil had a mini heart attack when he went to wake kalim up in the morning to see hes missing from his bed

Vil

vil when be sees u

yk how yall lived in pomefiore for a bit after the idia thing??

yeah he polished u up so much bro

u came into the dorm looking like someone abandoned u so youe only option was to live in the jungle with the help of ur jungle friends and have survived through the way of the mammals since u were an infant

and u came out looking like a brand new person

u came out of the dorm looking like u got new skin that its literally shining under light, ur hair softer and no longer tangled and no more eyebags and u smell like flowers

vil wiping his forehead after a job well done😊🙏

also he was pretty shocked when he found out u were pretty isolated from the human norms or whatever

he did try his best to break you bad habits, like literally running in mud

he also helped u with like speaking problems?

he got u a whole dictionary in case u dont know the word bro

also fix ur uniform for ueach time u try to loosen it up because its too suffocating for u

if u try to loosen it up one more time, he'll add the veggies in ur plate

he absolutely does makes u eat ur veggies

he'll tie u down a chair and make u eat them even

/j he wouldnt. he have rook to help him with that

Idia

him after he fixed ur dorm with the greatest and newest updated quality just for u to sleep outside

he gets it, youve been raised this way

but he just fixed it for u bro😢😢cant u at least sleep in there

grim sleeps in diff rooms every day bcs of the upgrade and u did this?? /j

oh well at least the outside kind of looks better now too he guess....

u dont even use the tv, u dont know how it works

"people in there real?" "? no ?"

he beats u in every video games ever because u literally could not keep up with technology

hes slaying everyone and youre wondering how to make ur character walk the way u wanted them to

u accidentally drowned somehow in the video game

he feels a tad bit bad for u

he cant bond much with u because like

hes quiet, youre quiet

hes a modern dude, u dont even know whats a phone

he likes video games, u prolly like hunting for food

if you two r in a room together, the only people who r talking r literally the wind

"whoosh whoosh whoosh🌬" whoosh whoosh🌪

Malleus

he spoke enough for the both of u (its abt gargoyles)

he actually spoke so much confusing words for u

u looked at him like 😃🫨 (ur head is spinning and u r dying)

u can always ask him if u dont understand tho

he will explain in another paragraph but its ok, at least u understand now

barely actually

ur brain hurts and its fried from talking to him since he use big words

he did try to use simpler words for u!!

oh u two can kind of bond i think

youre both not familiar with technology so it will work well

u know those faces grandparents make when looking through new technologies

like the eyes squinting and eyebrows furrowed look with thag confused look

yeah thats the both of u

u both try to figure it out together (it did not work out)

yall asked lilia for help

peepaw is into the trends, he can help the both of u dont worry!!

he saw how messy you could be sometimes and went damn

he'll fix u up with magic its ok

show me funny things, magic man

anyways its a habit of his to fix anything in ur appearance whenever u have ur nighty walks

like u have this dirt on ur white uniform? say no more.

theres a damned branch in ur hair (dont ask how u got that) and its tangled in ur hair?? he got u pookie

part of ur clothes r literally ripped off because god's knows what youve been doing in your free time??? u dont even need to ask bbg

[lace-coffin]

Hii 👋 Sorry if this req is odd or to specific lol. But how do you think Asa deal with a s/o who has phobias? Like I have a rlly extreme fear of the dark and needles, and I'm wondering wether or not Asa would give af about wether or not part of his collection has a phobia lmao. Have a great night/day!

How would Asa Emory react to a member of his collection having a phobia/phobias?

Asa Emory x gn!reader

Requests are open!

this is a super interesting ask! I literally love specific asks so no worries there! I hope u have a great day/night too < 3

It depends how high up in his collection you are, what you mean to him exactly. If you’re the drugged up captives in the lower levels of the hotels, scratching against the caged walls then he won’t care. You’re already sub human in his eyes, having to turn to cannibalising your cell mates for sustenance ,he couldn’t care less if your environment is making you more afraid.

If you’re a little higher ranking than that, one of many subjects he’s currently experimenting on then he may take your phobia into consideration, not through any affection for you however, it would be out of pure convenience.

How is he supposed to run his tests when you’re unresponsive and shivering for the first hour after he releases you from the box, still shaken from being kept in the dark for hours at a time. He doesn’t have the patience to deal with your squirming and crying when he tries to stick you with a needle, not being able to get the vein correctly if you keep moving.

He may administer needles whilst your asleep or leave a light on where you’re residing for the night so he doesn’t have to deal with you being “uncooperative” (you’re not being uncooperative, your just scared out of your mind, not that Asa cares)

Finally if you’re Asa’s prized pet and S/O then he’ll be merciful and try help you either conquer your phobias or outright do anything he can to make you feel safe.

Asa only uses needles with you if it’s absolutely necessary for your health and tries to avoid them completely otherwise. Your master will talk you through the whole process of administering the needle, distracting you if you need it, he may even blindfold you if you can’t stand to see it happen. He’ll ignore the death grip you have on his arm for your sake.

Once the jab is done he’ll comfort you, telling you that you did perfectly and he’s proud of you for being so good for him. “Just like that cricket, all done”

You’ll have a nightlight installed in your cage or near it so your never completely in the dark, even then your cage sits at the foot of Asa’s bed, filled with plush blankets and pillows, so he’s never far if you’re having a hard night and can’t cope. He’ll scoop you out of your cage and hold you against him, pulling you under the plush duvet and hushing you until you feel safe again. “So brave for me, cricket, focus on me, that’s it. Just let yourself go, sir’s here now”

[notdysfunk]

HELLO!!!

I am so very intrested in your Stars of a feather AU and wanted to ask a few questions if that's okay!

1) Are people who can't fly/ have small wings/ have NO wings looked down apon in society? Like a disability? Or do only some of the population have wings and its seen as a blessing?

2) Do partners/ parents/ friends groom each others wings? Is it seen as an intimate thing for partners? Kinda like birds? Or is it up to the individual to groom their own wings?

3) Are there various types of wings? Like Swan wings? Butterfly wings? Bat wings? Is it strictly feathered wings? Or again does it vary from person and race?

Thankyou for taking the time to read!! 💚

HAII!! HELLO!!!

I'm so glad you're interested aa!! I got so excited when I saw some questions abt this raah!! 💕💞 1) WHEW this is a packed question!! There /are/ quite a few people who have wings that are too small, damaged, or otherwise useless that make them unable to fly. Luckily, the world is quite down-to-earth (lol), so most everything is accessible from the ground, for this exact reason. (This world is very similar to ours, just people have wings LOL) Typically the most 'looked down upon' thing that I can think of has to do with the person's pride in their wings. People who are unable to fly, or even just have broken wings, might feel more insecure about them. Everyone has wings, but those who have more wings or bigger wings might be considered 'lucky' or 'blessed'. Causing this insecurity in others. (Sun takes pride in his wings, but he's humble <3)

2) Outside of the typical bath, some people will likely need to pick their wings for feathers that haven't fallen out yet... Which can be a little challenging on your own...

It's usually up to the person themselves, but a little help is nice!!

3) This is a rlly good question LOL There probably isn't many types of wings outside of feathered ones. Personally, I only really like drawing feathered wings so that's probably the most you'll see... . .. ... Different colors, type, number of, and size are the main differing factors to the wings though!

Honestly worldbuilding everything as I go, I just got asked to draw Sun/Moon with wings and it's slowly evolving HEHE!! And thank YOU for asking!! 💕💞💥��

[riansdiary]

how do I enter the void state tonight pls I rlly need help I rlly want to live my dream life everytime I start affirming for void I either fall asleep or just don’t end up entering so I give up

Hi! 👋

Okay so I'm warning you right now that I'm not an expert in void state and I don't know everything about it. I would suggest going to @salemlunaa because she's more well-versed in the void state. Personally, I haven't tried it yet because I know that I'm already a powerful manifestor and I get everything I want without the void state. Since many of you have been asking, I might give it a try this week! I'm gonna command my subconscious to get into it tonight or just know that I can easily get into the void state.

This time instead of giving up, try to assume that when you wake up, you successfully got into the void state no matter what you see. The void state is literally inside of you. You should be able to access it anytime. Don't put it on a pedestal and obsess over it. Get into the most comfortable position and then maybe try another void technique. If not then I want you to calmly affirm and tell yourself that it's easy for you to get into the void state. Don't force any affirmations or feelings. What's the basics of loa? You have it now as soon as you want it. You won't lose anything by accepting the fact that you're already living your dream life. Think of the 3d as past and you know the future. Remember this, calmly know that you have your dream life now. There's nothing to lose if you actually do that. If you have it in your mind, you have it now regardless of what the 3d is showing.

Just have the inner knowing that you have it now. You don't need to pretend in the 3d, try to be nonchalant and treat anything that says otherwise as a hater who's lying and saying that you don't have it. Be okay with the 3d, it's gonna follow you anyway. Cry if you feel like you need to but know that you have the last laugh because that's temporary. Do what makes you happy, that's important while you observe the 3d. Do something that will make you feel good like a good movie or show. Watch content that you love and makes you smile. I recommend watching Disney, Barbie and Ghibli movies! It will help to detach and distract yourself when dealing with the 3d. Be the main character who can't be beaten no matter what the villains do.

Be brave enough to observe the 3d and still confidently know that you have it now. Again, you don't have to do a thing. Feel how you would feel if you have your dream life now. Trust that you have it now. If you have your dream life now, would you do techniques? Don't do anything to get, imagine there's a girl who's finding her glasses in school and she was wearing them all this time. You don't have to get anything, you just have to accept that you have it now no matter what you see. Know you're wearing your glasses even if you don't see them. It's that feeling, you know you're wearing your necklace even if you don't see it all the time right?

Just try it for a week. Everyone says you have it now. Try accepting you have your dream life now and there's nothing left to do but continue to gently and calmly remind yourself without forcing anything that you have it now. Take a deep breath when you say it in your mind. Take your time and slowly do it to remind yourself.

Be confident and self-assured knowing that you have it now regardless of whatever the outside world is showing. You don't need to visualize at all. Just accept and internalize that if you know you have it now in your mind, it's true. You already have all your desires.

[skinnyminnie05]

Hey...

I haven't been active for so long and gained all the weight that I lost during oct and November (12 lbs) but I'm back now and more determined than ever

I'm gonna try and do it healthier this time. I feel like I sort of healed my food relationship a bit so it will be better for trying not to binge! Hopefully this stands true!

New plan:

run 4 miles a day(plus I walk around 10k steps in life)

->I already started this and lost 3 lbs in 2 days with it so im gonna start it up again tomorrow

2. I have a trip coming up next weekend so I'm gonna fast until then

->Ik that's a long time but it needs to be done bc my clothes r fitting weird and I don't even know anyone going so I need to be comfortable in my skin

3. after the trip I will have less than 800 cals a day

-> my foods will include: protein bars, coffee, sf popsicles, halo top ice cream(my fav thing ever), and fruits & veggies

4. I will weigh myself everyday and record it in my new journal I got for Christmas(I'll show u guys its so freaking cute)

5. I will take my vitamins every day (my mom got me some new vitamins and one works kinda like ozempic but its all natural)

6. I WILL NOT B1NG3 NO MATTER WHAT

-> It is my downfall every time and is what makes my relationship with food so horrible. Also it is straining my relationship with God because it is so gluttonous and sinful and destroying my life

7. I will pray every night

->Ik its not part of wl but it will def help me with everything including keeping on track and having good mental health

8. I will keep my room clean and shower every day(otherwise I end up b1ng3ing for some reason idk why it triggers me)

Thanks for reading! I can't wait to become a normal person bc this overweight bs is rlly not my vibe anymore like I'm done at this point I've been trying to loose this weight since I was in 8th grade

[nyctoaerah]

Hi aerah 😊😊😊 I need you to kill me pls bc my brother found me reading one of ur fics 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊 and he read it too 😊😊😊😊😊😊 he said the only redeeming quality was the writing otherwise I'm a loser for reading it 😊😊😊😊 it was ur suguru fic with the "blind" reader 😊😊😊😊😊😊 I'm not okay this is so embarrassing 😊

HELP MISA WHAT. WHY ARE YOU EVEN READING THAT BULLSHIT BAHAHAHHAHA ,I LITERALLY LAUGH EVERYTIME I READ THAT SHIT😭😭😭 HONESTLY, I CAN’T BLAME HIM BCS I CRINGE EVERYTIME I SEE THT SHIT.... It's okay misa.. we're both losers in here.. BUT YEA YEA THATS LITERALLY EMBARRASSING BAHAHAHHAA. I agree with your brother!! That one is literally shit:333 i don’t evn know if the writing of that is good since i stopped halfway reading it💀💀 ASKSKSKS THIS IS WHY I KEPT MY TUMBLR AT FIRST TO MYSELF SO MY POOKIES DON’T SEE THE EMBARRASSING SHIT I WRITE💔💔💔 BUT THE APOCALYPSE RLLY LED ME TO THIS😔😔😔

I AM SO SORRH MISA BUT YOUR BROTHER IS RIGHT, THAT FIC WAS SHIT HAHHAHAHAHHAHA

But it's alr, the both of us can be losers together😏😏

He’s just a hater cause he can’t see the fun in dark stuff🔥🔥🔥

GO MISA, TELL HIM THAT HE’S A LOSER TOO, CAUSE TECHNICALLY, HE STARTED READING IT TOO, MEANING THAT HE’S A LOSER TOO.

MISA HE’S PROJECTING HIS OWJ INSECURITIES INTO YOU SO THAT HE WOULD FEEL BETTER (i am totally not gaslighting rn)

....but srsly, you’re not the only one who’s embarrassed now... Pls kill me misa. I want to jump in a volcano now so bad....

[stgosupremacy]

MY SATOGOU GOODBYE RANT.

so yeah i said i would do one so here i am. honestly dont know how long this will be so let's get stuck in lmao <33

I'm starting after the 'im glad i met you part', bc i kind of already did a post on that anyway lol (and just wanted to add, in the dub they changed it to 'I'm sure glad i met you,' and Ash says it so soft omg i literally died on the spot watching it ;-;

(headsup ignore the fact some of the images are off a youtube channel i couldn't find the scenes💀)

so i hope this is all in order, but this bit is so so SO sweet when Goh tells him 'thanks for reaching out for me' like no surprise i was literally crying at that point like sgdxkjnfsgf it's so sweet to me that without Ash none of his journey would have really happened, but tbf you could say the same for all of his companion tbh. either way, i am very glad goh met satoshi too omg <3 🥺

theennnnnn this part is Ash just offering some sweet words of advice and comfort, talking ab their dreams ect, like, nothing too bittersweet to see here, but i guess you can say the way he said 'WE' and meant both of them is sweet lmao

OK so on the palm of our hands thing i have a few things to say

first of all i love how Ash knew that he knew what to continue with bc they are just so in sync with each other ofc <3 and OFC they had to put that scene in for the last episode, like when it was in the Mewto episode for the first time, i was honestly screaming of how cute it was LIKE THE FACT ASH MADE THE LITTLE ADD ON OF 'OUR HANDS' IN THE FIRST TIME THEY DID IT JUST MAKES IT EVEN MORE CUTER EJHSKF

but anyways as much as i love this scene because of how 'the future is in the palm of our hands', can be interpreted in some otherways, 👀 I also couldnt help but thing about something else.

after/before the Project mew stuff actually started/finished (pretty sure it was after,) we see a scene of Goh, Gary and Horace using the 'palm of our hands' phrase together, and yeah its rlly cute lmao, but i was kind of hoping it was something unique for Ash and Goh, not trying to be a fusspot, but i think the scene now feels slightly less special to me now Goh used it with some other people?

I mean sure, ash and goh were still the first people who did it, and it IS their kind of thing lmao, like they created it. Even tho it was just an initial thought, it is still really sweet that goh used it with others don't get me wrong <3

when i was watching this i was like no way this is it lol like are you not gonna confess

jokes but thankfully they made a bittttt more to it (and good bc if they left it there I would be sitting there like what)

so they start to walk away from each other and you see Goh is still quite sad while Ash is still holding up, my heart was dying </3

STOP IT WHEN GOH STOPPED AND HE WAS ABOUT TO CRY AAAAAAAAAA 🥺🥺🥺

BUT OFC

OFC ASH HAS TO CALL OUT TO HIM AND THE WAY GOH'S EYES HAVE THE LITTLE SPARKLE WHEN HE HEARS HIS VOICE 💖 The fact Ash actually thought while he was walking away 'oh shit need to check up on the bf' lol and climbed up the little hill to wave him off again is the cutest thing; CANNOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE this made their whole goodbye for me tbh 💕💕💕

SUPPORTIVE BROS FOR REAL <3

ofc they want each other to achieve their dreams aww

ok but THIS

the bit where they nod at each other is so comforting to me like it's weird, but it gave me a little more satisfaction i'll say, lmao. also gives you a hint that they are wrapping up the goodbyes fully so it gave me some very brief preparation time 😢

and with that, Goh runs off into the distance.

</3 (my boy has grown up sm) 🥺

OK i do love that when he runs off, he's more confident, and when it switches back to Ash, it has him watching over Goh until he can't see him anymore, which is rlly cute <333 ahhh they're so pure man

Ash runs off to his new journey too, and he begins to talk about Pallet Town to Pikachu...

Thats it

yeah

SOOOOO BASICALLY THIS IS MORE OF THE RANT SECTION:

uhmmm so first things first. Did i like the goodbye for them? Well, yeah, it was quite cute, especially the end part where Ash gives him that last bit of encouragement and called out his name, because SHEESH if they left that part out and gave them that first goodbye without Ash calling out to him, and they just left each other....yeah, i wouldn't be happy.

see, i just kind of thought they deserved a bit better. It was v cute and all, but like they've been through so much together 😭 😭 😭 😭 like I'm saying this as a shipper but still 😂 tbf if they hugged I probably would have cried but let's be honest I could cry at anything at this point

but hey what we got was pretty cute, I just would have tweaked some things because honesty this duo are literally the closest I've ever seen in the anime, and I would have hoped for a little bit more, BUT IT'S FINE IT HAPPENED *mentally counts*

9 MONTHS AGO (??? where has the time gone)

but thank you for coming to my TED talk <33

[kyunniebuns]

Been Thinking bout something and that is: Wei Wuxian as Jinwoo's Master/Big bro buddy

For those who don't know: Wei Wuxian is the main character of "Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation" but is most known as "Mo Dao Zu Shi" and that title is actually what Wei Wuxian is. He is the equivalent of necromancer in that universe. Wei Wuxian uses the flute to control corpses to do his bidding. But unlike Jinwoo, it causes harm to Wei Wuxian so he rarely uses that ability bUT, he still does. He uses Demonic Cultuvation as his path because he gave his spiritual core to Jiang Cheng (His adoptive brother to enemy)

AND HERE I PROPOSE, WEI WUXIAN ADOPTING JINWOO!!!

Imagine a jinwoo reincarnating to where Wei Wuxian is and Jinwoo is a tiny bebe atleast 8 years old but still has that monarch hierarchy and powers. Wei Wuxian found him and said "YEP, UR COMING TO GUSU LAN WITH ME!!'

(Gusu Lan- A mountain place where the clan that resides in it is the auspicious family of the Lan clan who are wind attribute and Gusu Lan is also where the equivalent of 'Academy' in that universe)

And since Wei Wuxian is the wife(Yee, HE is married) of the Second Head of Gusu Lan, Lan Wangji(who raises a lot of kids because he is a teacher)— Jinwoo was easily accepted into the clan

Wei Wuxian did not like the idea of Jinwoo being a necromancer because in his universe, 'Demonic Cultivation' is harmful and he though that applies to Jinwoo who is just physically a baby. But Jinwoo would prove otherwise that his necromancy doesn't stem from anything but himself that doesnt really harm him. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji strictly forbade Jinwoo from using them unless necessary and the couple decided to make sure Jinwoo grows up as a good man(Despite the fact that Jinwoo is alr a grown-up and can easily topple heaven and hell and ghost city just by himself but hey its nice having people care abt you)

Jinwoo is raised as a 'Lan' child who studies their arts and it was helpful for Jinwoo cuz hey he learned about Qi stuff even tho he doesn't rlly need them wheheheh....

Here comes the silly part: Jinwoo is technically considered as WangXian's(Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian) lovechild even tho the couple alr have so many children.

Wei Wuxian is a goofy guy and teaches Jinwoo silly things and even taught Jinwoo what kind of wine is the best wine

Jinwoo: I'm actually 24+ and cant get drunk anm but hey sure I'll listen to u.

Jinwoo considers Wangxian as caretakers until he saw how much the couple cares for the kids and goes very far to protect everyone, including Jinwoo🥹🥹🥹.

Jinwoo got the feeling that even tho it wasnt said to him, he felt like he is being told "We know you are strong, but let us handle this. Let us protect you."

And as Jinwoo who is always defending himself and risking his life, it stroke a string inside him and he has since gained sm respect for Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian

Crack:

.Wei Wuxian tryna teach Jinwoo's shadows how to drink wine and bith Jinwoo and Lan Wangji are just so dine with him😭😭

[lestappenforever]

sorry if this is gunna sound rude but i rlly am so dam exhausting seeing lestappies throw charles under the bus

like if u like max more thats def fine and is ur right as a fan but treating charles like hes a noob who wont get anywhere in the sport as long as max is there is rlly .. smth i gotta say

if u don’t believe in him then pls just ignore him lmao dont go hype him up only when he ‘helping max’ win the championship it’s rlly so sad to see that their support relies on max like how tf does that work lmao 😭😭

anyway saw too many ppl (leatappies) shit on him this break it’s rlly exhausting when hes not rlly part of the conversation but they like to trash him anyway 🤷

Hi anon!

Not really sure why you felt the need to start this off with "if this is gonna sound rude", unless you're accusing me of throwing Charles under the bus? But if that’s not your intent (I sure hope it isn’t), then you're all good.

I'm really sorry that's your experience. I'll be honest and say I can't relate to that at all because I am yet to see a single Lestappen enjoyer throw Charles under the bus or mention him the way you're explaining, for which I am very grateful. So it seems like some of you follow and/or otherwise get exposed to the wrong blogs and posts, which really sucks.

But, and I cannot stress this enough, it is your responsibility to create a Tumblr experience for yourself that you enjoy. There are tools easily available to you in order to do that, such as the blocking and the blacklisting features, and it’s up to you to make sure you use these however you see fit to ensure you don't expose yourself to blogs, posts and takes that you don’t agree with and that you don’t want to see. If you see something that negatively impact you mentally or emotionally, then you need to do your part in ensuring you don't come across that blog or post again. If you don't, you're going to keep seeing things that impact you negatively and upset you, and that will be nobody’s fault but your own.

Every single driver, and that includes Charles, has a lot of people out there who actively and vocally dislike them. And some of them love making their opinions known. That's just how it is, and that's never going to change — that's just the case for every single sport out there, and it is definitely not special, or worse, for F1 or certain drivers. Knowing this, it's up to you to ensure you don't get exposed to those people if they upset you in any way, shape or form. Tumblr isn’t going to do that for you, so you have to do it yourself.

You're never going to change somebody's mind about a driver they dislike, and there’s no point in even trying. Just like I'm sure nobody else could ever change your mind about your favorites and the drivers you dislike.

So the very simple and very effective solution here is to use the block and blacklist features as often and as much as you need, and create the kind of Tumblr experience you want for yourself. And that is entirely up to you.

Remember, Tumblr is supposed to be fun for you, and you need to do what you can to ensure that's the case. You don't owe anyone on this platform anything — just like nobody on this platform owes you anything.

Please be proactive here, my dear anon. You will gain nothing and only end up having an unnecessarily bad time if you’re not, I promise. And you don't deserve that. ❤️

[strawberrylabs]

heyyy, could you do a hunterxhunter match up? i'm 14, traumatized, i like weed, i hate school, i rlly like boba, im actually special lmao, n i sound like a fucked up car when i laugh. tyyyy

Thank you for the request! Sorry for the late reply ;-;

Because you're under 18, this will be platonic.

Hope you enjoy!

I match you with…

Killua!

Y’all met just before the Hunter exam, like, on the way there

You probably pointed out his skateboard and he pointed something that you had- in this case probably weed or boba

From there on out, you guys stuck together with Gon throughout the exam

At the end of the exam when Illumi was a prick to Killua, you were pissed.

How dare he manipulate your best friend like that?

You were about to step in until Illumi threatened to kill you.

And Killua couldn’t just take that

So he gave up to save you and Gon

“Killua, you shouldn’t give that bastard what he wants! Fight him!”

“Don’t be stupid, I can’t beat him… and he’d hurt you and Gon if I did”

Anyways, fast forward to after Killua kills the guy in the exam. 

You follow him out of the exam venue

When he tells you he’s going home you say you’ll follow him

He tries to stop you but you’re too stubborn and too high to give up.

And that’s where your friendship truly blooms

From then on out, the two of you were inseparable

You like to brag to Gon that you’ve been inside Killua’s home

To which Killua insists isn’t actually a good thing, considering how many times you were almost killed

Killua’s family didn’t know what to think about his new, very high, very unphased friend.

His mum 100% tried to kill you like 5 times

Anyways

As you guys get closer he opens up to you about his past with his family and the expectations they hold for him.

And if you feel up to it, he’ll listen if you want to share your burdens too.

“Listen, I may be new to this whole ‘friend’ thing, but I’m still capable of listening.”

“Aww Killua, that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said!”

“Shut up, I can be nice when I want to! You’re just stupid!”

“Sure thing Kil”

During heaven’s arena the two of you get into competitions about who’s learning nen quicker and who’s nen is stronger 

Killua has to admit, he’s a little jealous when it turns out you’re a specialist user

But that just lead to more competitions

Killua won’t tell a soul, but he kept making competitions to motivate you to study nen with them. He knows you probably would’ve said no to studying otherwise

Throughout the trials of the greed island arc, and the horrors of the chimaera ants, the two of you look out for each other and comfort each other through the deaths of your friends.

You and Gon have grown to be close as well

You both have an agreement to always be there for Killua when he needs someone to help him process his family trauma

Overall, Killua won’t admit it often, but he truly appreciates having you in his life and would rather watch the world burn than lose you

“Hey.. uh.. Thanks for, you know.. Being my friend...”

I hope you enjoyed!

-Strawberry🍓

Masterlist

Rules

[susiron]

I rlly need to try and get rid of this tic / OCD ritual (it's a bit of both)

I have a tendency to knock on my skull with my fist, and every once in awhile I hit a Little too hard.

I accidentally clocked myself pretty good tonight. I think I'm fine, other than I made my headache worse (no weird vision stuff or confusion or anything else concerning). But man I AM worried about hurting myself Eventually with this.

I started back on my anxiety meds again and I'm hoping that helps, but otherwise I just Really need to try and see if I can get myself to do something less destructive when my intrusive thoughts get bad.

I literally already have a bump in the center of my forehead from doing this.

I'm thinking of trying to do vocal tics/sounds more but part of me is nervous with that cause of social norm bullshit. But it's like the only thing I can think of that might be on par with the sensation/association that makes me feel the need to strike my head.

The head knocking/scratching/punching started cause the OCD thought process was "I'm having a bad thought, and I'm going to knock it away", so when I have intrusive thoughts there's a list of like ways I try to mitigate it and a lot of them involve either tapping on my forehead with one finger to a counted pattern, or knocking on my skull until it "feels right".

It kinda goes between my OCD and tourette's though cause it's not always tied to an intrusive thought, sometimes it's more for the sensation-- especially when I hit myself in the head with my phone.

I'm rambling, but like-- yeah. I think I might just try and encourage the vocal bullshit more. Cause god damn accidentally punching myself aint it.

[fainthedcherry]

7.3.24 there was a deadline for a DTIYS my IRL friend, kobra_the_artist , hosted back around February!! I had like...3 days to finish the sketch I started back in February. It's...A pain being late to EVERYTHING with a deadline, but at least deadlines help me push finish a drawing, I otherwise would let rot in my WIP folder for almost a year (hell, some sketches are like 3 years old that are rotting in there now, that I'm self-aware about, yet still keep forgetting. ._." )

I don'ttt have too much to say on this one? Since it was a DTIYS, I recommend checking out the insta post simply, I'm not about to take my friend's artwork and cross-post it to somewhere else, I feel, that'd be scummy to do. :T SO LINK TO THE OG CONTEST POST! HUZZAH! plusssss, I think I yapped enough on my own insta post. :v

I just rlly wanted to draw Kobra, as I love her sona's design. I adore demon-anything, can u blame me LMAO. I need excuses to draw ppl's OCs willingly and gladly more. It's so hard to motivate myself to draw something at all for people anymore AUUUUGH

Somehow I won 1st place??? Don't ask em HOW, as I found other people's entries much better than mine ngl, butttt I'll never understand, that my art is actually enjoyed by some people anyway, ngl. Even years later, I still sometimes feel, like I don't deserve to call myself an artist LMFAO

I also added a little funne below, we both wanted to draw for fun, once we were in a call just rambling and stuff. On the right, has been drawn by Kobra!! (You can open the green, first link above, to her insta itself! She doesn't have Tumblr. No one in my friend group does, but I love Tumblr tbh. :"))

You should try ceramic pans. They are the best flavour. /lh

ANOTHER POST THERE IS! WHERE ART IS! I might post character concept-refs next. I'm running out of "good-looking things" to post, that won't make me look like a total amateur from the 2010s DA era. I've only uploaded these in my scraps on DA back then, so maybe you'll get weekly posts, as I draw concept refs basically weekly, to keep my chara-base up to date for comms and art exchange!

I wanna do a DTIYS myself some day!! But maybe in 4 years, where I dream of having paid off all my art-debt finally I've been working so hard to pay off on lately...

[zhuhongs]

hhhhh so im on a ridiculously long ride home and just my phone so tumblr diary entry time lol. if you have my instagram this will make more sense but yk. anyways. so yesterday was the last day of the semester and i was tbh pretty normal abt it. but leading up to it i was a mess and tbh i think my stomach issues actually came more from the stress of knowing im leaving but the alcohol seemed plausible enough an explanation so i ran with it. but nah i was just. hhhh overwhelmed. bc anytime i was out with ppl it disappeared and as soon i was alone and not busy i was like. oh theres the stomach pain. LOL. but yea. so i decided my going away present to everyone would be a drawing of them plus a message bc like. i always said i liked art but never rlly showed my classmates my art so i was like. welp lets go out with a bang. and it felt good bc i really wanted to do smth like this sooner. my initial plan to make a good impression was to print stickers of my art and put my IG on it and get close to ppl that way. but i was just far too stressed and thought itd be weird. so i just. Didnt. and i regret not putting in enough effort at the beginning. but i also feel like its okay, especially given my upbringing. i needed that time to myself to figure it out, and now i really know that i can just. talk to ppl. and not be afraid. bc the ppl i got closest to were the one i swore would judge me most bc of my own preconceived notions, but i told the the parts of me i hid the most and they accepted it. and could at least sympathize and actually relate and i just. why was i so silly. why was i so mean to myself to be convinced that i was so unacceptable that no one except for those who already knew me could accept me and enjoy my presence? i was so silly. i wont do that again, but if i do, it will still be easier than doing it this time bc I'll recognize the patterns and quickly snap out of it.

in a way, i really do feel like i needed all this time alone to process myself and rlly look myself in the eye and recognize the ways ive lived that i can just stop doing now that i have the freedom to be free of my past. and part of me feels like I'm saying that as copium bc i didnt connect sooner and i possibly could have also had a better time with others and still have come to realize the same things and more through the help and company of others. but i also know that i cant live life always thinking so much. so i just need to live and let the regrets be what they are, and move forwards. but the regrets do indeed linger. like i made the decision not to stay in taiwan. bc of well A. money and B. i felt like if i had more time I'd just fucking waste it like i wasted the first 4 months. i might as well force myself into a corner and see if that would make me do things i was too scared to do otherwise. and like, it worked! i did say fuck it and rlly just let loose bc i was gonna leave but now its worked too well. and like i wish soooo bad that i had those 3 months to fully enjoy every chance working out. Part of me says that its best to leave with that hope. rather than have taken that chance and it fizzled out. the thing keeping me from extending the most was honestly knowing I'd have my birthday there. and i could not take the possibility of spending my birthday alone... i legit couldnt stomach it. in the past i used to spend every bday alone but in recent years ive had a mazing friends that actually made my bday special and i just. I'm so used to having that day be nice that i really couldnt take the possibility of it being awkward. but now i realize that it wouldn't have been like that. it couldve been wonderful. but thats okay, in another life. or maybe a few years. who knows. im considering doing smth like this again in like 2 years after I've worked a bit. i have nothing but time. but man. sometimes i just wonder yk.

and last night i had a rlly good one on one talk with my classmate and that was amazing, but i got home and checked IG like a dumbass and say another group of classmates partying til 3am and i was like.... man i should've done that. but like, logically no. i had a great night regardless and i partied with those classmates last week. ive had my fill, and i had things to do today that i needed to be coherent for. but i couldn't help but thinking what if. and i know its not so easy to kill that voice inside my head. its always gonna be there. its not just me, thats the devil of SNS like instagram. bc you see the best parts of everyone's lives at all times and feel like you're missing out but you're not. you only see a sliver of what it really was..but yea. its okay. I'm still so very young. and i just need to treasure now and take whatever chances i get to nourish the connections i have right now and put yourself out there to make new ones when the chances arise. its okay, there is not life that can be lived without saying goodbye. but damn, yesterday at the school gates two of my classmates hit me with the さよなら and that. man i felt it in that moment. theres so much i wish i couldve said in all that time we had to spend together but i just held my tongue bc i was scared. but this was really playing social interaction on hard mode, like the cultural differences, the language barrier, the introversion, the fact it was my first time on my own fr, just, there were soooo many factors working against me specifically. and fuck man, i still did it. and i am still so young, i really can do whatever i want. it feels so weird. ive only been here 6 months but in a way it feels like this is how its always been. like the fact that im going home feels so strange. like i havent been there in years, i honestly cant fully grasp that im gonna be in a place where i speak the language fluently and am fully aware and familiar with my surroundings. like, why does that feel so odd. it does, i legit dont even know how to feel besides strange. i just have a strange pit in my stomach. but its okay. it will pass as everything does. but these days will always live on inside me as everything does. even if i can't fully recall it. so i just have to keep going as always. god. life is trippy man. but yea. Yea. thats it. i think