#i reread this chapter and had this harrowing realisation ... ive talked about these panels before ... but re-reading them today came with

[truethes]

that last post gutted me like a fish so tbh i am going to talk about ku.ro and how his martyrism never ended with adam.

the interesting thing about this page is the discovery that killing the count does not come without a curse (one that puts you to sleep for more than a hundred years with no real guarantee of when you'll wake up) - while it's porminent to know that this is something tsub.aki, lil.y, jej.e and the alicei.ns are aware of, it's placement hints a rather interesting truth.

these panels are in the middle of ku.ro's memories, meaning that ku.ro was aware that his decision to kill the count would ultimately lead to some sort of curse that would make him disappear for at least 100 years at that.

when we see him in the scene where they decide the counts fate, he appears almost out of it - much more depressed and desolate than he had been when even called to attend it, because there is a chance that this scene (and it's revelations) happened between the two. while the other three voted to kill the count, the words from mrs alice.in were probably running through his head in the same tune: he was responsible, and therefore it would become his responsibility to bare the curse and this unknown fate at the same time.

it explains his reactions to both lawl.ess and gea.r more honestly: lawl.ess calls him out for being this martyr and ku.ro does not answer because he knows it's the truth. he refuses to look gea.r in the eye when he promises they can fix the cieling in the roof when he gets back because truthfully, he doesn't know if he'll ever be.

the "geez .... what a pain" carries such a heavy burden without anyone but the one's in that room knowing. the situation was worse than ku.ro thought, but if there was one thing these people knew about him the most - it's that he would always sacrifice himself in place of those he cared about in the same vein.