#i remember very little before middle school that wasnt bad and

[precambrianhottopic]

actually its nice having good memories. a lot of them

[cynthiesjmxazrielslover]

Bittersweet love

An original AUmodernAzriel x Reader

these songs remind me of them <3333

Warnings: Mentions of abuse, mention of trauma Summary: Growing up with your abusive father and your mother who never spoke up against him, you had truly given up hope of any chance of a real relationship, of real love, the ones of the kind that you read about in your books, till you're proven wrong.

A/N: this is my first fic ever+english isnt my first language, and I wrote this in a daze, the idea came to me at like 3 AM,so....enjoy muah<3 Thump.....thump. DAMN IT CAROLINE GET OUT HERE! Another night another fight, that too on their anniversary, a classic. I scoff thinking about all the picture-perfect smiles and the absolutely lovely speech my dad had read out for my mom tonight, a show, it was all a show, no one knew what went inside our house every week, how my dad hit my mom, screamed at her and then bought ridiculously expensive gifts for her as if that would fix everything. I was so so tired of their useless fights, every time it all ended the same way, with my mom never leaving. I heard the rain outside before I saw it. One thing about me was that I always loved the rain, growing up, and till now it just felt right to cry under its cover, to cry with it, to admire how beautiful it felt to be enveloped in her comfort and just...let everything go. I sneaked out my window and walked out of our backyard. There was an abandoned house right behind mine, I spread rumors just so everyone thought, it was either haunted or inhabited, in truth it was my den. Snacks, clothes, comfy blankets, duvets, you name it. It had all I needed to feel better. When I entered my lair I noticed that most of my snacks were empty and the empty packets pristine clean. Oh no, someone had discovered the truth, I turned around only to find a pair of hazel eyes staring back at me, the darkness enveloped him, I couldn't see him, but guessed well enough he was taller than me. I cursed at myself for being stupid enough to enter an abandoned place at night in the middle of a heavy down pour. No, no, no, no. I stepped back I couldn't die like this, not in this shit hole. "Um, hello there. Are you okay? you just seem a little pale" I gaped at him. He had the most alluring voice id ever heard on a man and damn did it mess with my senses. "I won't hurt you, I promise. Look I'm not armed plus I dont even have enough energy to argue right now." He stepped a bit closer enough that I could make out his silhouette illuminated by the moonlight. His hazel eyes were a sweet honey brown shade, tanned skin, muscles, tall as frick, and hot too. Holy crap this guy looked straight out of a book. "Hello?". Realizing I'd been gaping at it the whole time it took me second to remember the situation I'd found myself in before I said "Hi, Im Lana" I lied, my name wasnt lana but i wasnt gonna tell some random guy who ate my snacks AND all my blueberry sour candy my name, Im not that dumb. He steps out of the shadows so i could get a proper look at him, and so he could look at me i realize. "Hello Lana, Im Azriel". I looked at him, really looked at him noticed 3 things, 1. He didnt look much older than me, meaning either he was in school or in college, 2. He was wearing my oversized hoodie which looked a little too small on him, and 3. He looked in a bad shape. He had bruises on his face marring his body, burned hands, swollen eye and looked cold, very cold and malnourished. He looked almost......homeless.

I snuck a glance outside.

I silently swore, if this man- Azriel, stayed here any longer he would DIE, either of fever or due to infection. I might already have brought a one way ticket to the deepest darkest pits of hell but doesnt mean he did. Without a thought i spit out "Come to my house". "Im sorry what?" he chuckled out smirking at me as a flush crept over me. "I-I meant that you cant stay here, there's heavy rain and its cold here. pfft that's totally what i meant" i stammer out. Reminder to curl up and die in a corner later on. He furrows his brow at my statement, a hint of amusement on his face. "Haven't you heard of stranger danger Lana?" He pipes out, his voice low and gravelly. "I doubt an 18 year old guy who wears Minnie Mouse hoodies with dora the explorer socks and a pink bow pajamas would try to kidnap me" Okay now this dude was really crossing it for me. Reminder number 2- Drown these clothes in holy water before wearing them again. Now it was his turn to be embarrassed. "I still look better in these than you could ever. But you're smart and these clothes fit me like a fucking tank top and shorts, so yes, Lana, I'll come to your house. Only because Im freezing out here" He added FRICK. FRICK THIS WAS A BAD,BAD IDEA

Azriels POV I stepped out of the shower, steam rising from the hot water. I smelled like lavender soap and vanilla- The scent of real men. I put on the fresh pair of clothes Lana gave me, A little smaller than what i wore but better than those hoodies of hers anyway. I saw her reading a book when i stepped out, no gods not another book-obsessed psycho. She motioned for me to sit down and applied some bandages, honey, and anti-septic cream and gave me some medecine, pain killers i guessed. She seemed to know what she was doing, better than going to a doctor if it meant it was free and she wasn't going- "Who gave you get these" My chain of thoughts are interrupted by her words. "I got myself banged up by a....raccoon?" A raccoon? A RACCOON? Thats the best I could come up with? Telling a girl that i got banged up by a raccoon? She laughs at my answer. It's not a soft melodic sound like i expected but a burst of laughter. She snorts and smirks at me. "Damn, a raccoon huh? Wait,does that mean your're pregnant now?Plus,what? did it tackle you to the ground with its little toe beans? What were you even fighting over, who gets the last thrown out doughnuts from the dumpster, oh, or, did she kick you out of the house instead? You're lovely raccoon wife." She laughs out, barely able to form the sentence without controlling her laughter. I roll my eyes but I cant help smile, I knew very little about this girl but i did know 4 things, 1. She was a terrible liar, introducing herself under a fake name when her name was written under every single one of her drawings, 'y/n' I liked that name, it sounded different yet familiar on my tongue. 2.She might have just saved my life 3. She had a very good taste in candy and 4. we are about to become very, very, very good friends, something I hadn't had in a while. Tell me in the comments if you want to be tagged in the next parts, plus im open to supportive constructive criticism so let me know how i can improve =) taglist: @anarchiii @starlightazriel @velarisdusk @siriuslystyle1989 @scorpioriesling

[beesmygod]

What are some of your favorite pieces of art/ art that has made you think a lot?

this is such a cheesy cop-out answer, but there's a lot of things that im going to struggle remembering because of 1. how situational the experience was (as in, the context in which i experienced the piece) 2. how wide the word "art piece" is. 3. the great fortune to have been born to parents with strong artistic sensibilities and a love of travel/education. so these are like. really weird and specific but maybe thats the way it should be:

let's start with the most overly dramatic: st. paul's cathedral in london has guided tours where they take you into rooms and let you mill around before moving to the next one. my family took a trip overseas as a really, really big special vacation to celebrate my sister and i graduating from high school (we're not twins, we just combo'd it after she graduated) that i was too brain-broken and teenage to fully appreciate. its a beautiful cathedral but i was in my edgy internet atheist stage and refused to be impressed by it until i stood over a grate in the floor. through the grates you can see the crypt that you visit next. but standing over the grate, someone below started to sing something hymnal and very catholic. and i realized i was the only one who could hear it because of the crowd chatter. and it made me feel, in the moment, so special and so lonely in a way that i still think about, a lot. it was for me only. divine providence.

a date with adam to a place i had no idea existed but he had been to before: the bad art museum, which is split over like 3 different buildings in a bizarre way. we only went to the one where you have to buy a ticket to a movie as entry and it was some truly lovely bad art and made me sad how inaccessible it was but resolute about my love of the nuances of uncelebrated anti-art masterpieces. then we watched "assassination nation" and it was fucking terrible. great date.

reading the theory regarding the "venus of willendorf" being a self portrait as a 20-something year old and running into the bathroom to take my clothes off and look down at myself and having my mind blown. not just by how much i instantly understood it, but because of the tugging feeling on my heart when i feel that strand of history connecting women artists driven by that unknown compulsion to create for creations sake!

similarly, seeing artemisia gentileschi's work next to her fathers and realizing how much she outclassed him in every single way and feeling the tugging feeling again, but this time with a dark woe of realization of how history minimizes achievement and talent when it eases a narrative

reading jane erye's descriptions of herself and her approaches to her plights and for the first time feeling like someone had walked a path that i currently found myself lost on.

reading 1984 as a middle schooler and becoming so angry at the ending i threw the book across the room (something i had never done before and never did again in my life) and stormed out of my room to complain to my mom lol. IT REALLY UPSET ME!!!

reading les miserables for the first time and weeping piteously for days after the ending and having it impact my brain so hard it re-wired how i think about the concept of "legacy" and what it means to matter in the world and how love is nothing without the courage to stand up for it. and that mercy should, and will, always supersede unwavering justice (hard lesson to remember, maybe im due for a re-read)

sneaking into my parents room to read the books i wasnt supposed to yet as a really little kid lol. my mom used to get "dykes to watch out for" in a newsletter she was subscribed to! but i didnt read those bc they were dumb relationship comics for grown-ups. i wanted to read about opus the penguin and lee iacocca, as if i knew who that was. my mother's comic collection was the single most influential constant in my life. knowing that i was exposed to bill watterson's commentary about his own work via the big collections my mom owned probably explains a lot about what's wrong with me. but she also had a lot of berke breathed before he fully wussed out

the general experience of playing a video game that you arent supposed to/when you arent supposed to is probably one of the most freeing means of meaningless rebellion as a kid that everyone should experience. i used to be up playing pokemon past my bedtime under my covers with a huge heavy rubber flashlight i stole from the kitchen and had to replace every morning without getting caught once i was done with it. god, the days before backlit screens we had to get really fucking wild with it. in high school i would wake up at 5:00am, sneak into the computer room where the ps2 was and play an hour of FFX bc its the longest fucking non-persona game in the world, stop playing before my mom woke up at 6:00am and sneak back into bed. if i hit a part where i couldnt save i would just turn the screen off and come back to it tomorrow lol. secrets......

reading the "pictures for sad children" arc about paul, who is a ghost, finally losing it and going on a rant about how it has never mattered how thin a computer screen is. they were right and reading it helped me articulate and understand a growing feeling of restless frustration at the world around me that i felt singular and alone in. im glad that last i heard that artist is doing ok. i hope they recognize the incredible value in their work as imperfect as they perceived it to be. i do not think they would be happy to know that their old work was impactful, but i hope they realize that what people are able to tease out of their work is meaningful, at least to me it is. ill transcribe the comic rather than repost it i think: paul [while smashing electronics]: "have i told you about [bam] how nerds destroy the world take conspicuous consumption as a lifestyle choice and combine it with early hardware adoption and you have great swaths of gadgetry out of stock because they're incrementally better than the last model and there are landfills full of functioning electronics wasted time, resources, money, etc. the best part is that these things were never necessary it has never mattered how thing a computer is." [smash]

this is too long. i like art.

[rabit333n]

awkward ||

matt sturniolo🫶

CW - none i dont think ??? kissing i guess. its mostly just fluff (i think im using that word right?). it might be corny.

this is my first time publishing any of my writing !!!!! PLEASE be nice to me. :)

summary - matts been your best friend since middle school. when on a drive late one night something accidental turns into the both of you kissing. reader is the pink text, matt is the blue text. :3

based off this song !

you and matt had been best friends for as long as you remembered -- well, as long as things actually started to matter to you. you moved to matts school in the 7th grade, you were thirteen years old at the time.

it was a fresh start, something new, you had gone to the same place your entire life, so to say you were anxious on your first day was an understatement.

in your first period, you got sat next to a quiet boy. at the time, you were grateful he wasnt immature and disrespectful like most of the boys your age you had met.

you tried your hardest to mind your business and focus on the review from what they were taught the previous year, but your nervs and your lack of understanding got in the way.

after about 5 minutes of visible frustration, the boy beside you took notice of your expression and offered to help

-- "hi, i dont mean to bother you, but i noticed you seem a bit confused ? do you mind if i help you?"

your cheeks flush a light pink out of embarassment, not realizing how obvious it was that you had no idea what you were doing.

-- "yeah, actually, if you want to.. they didnt cover this at my old school so i just.."

you shrug awkwardly and lean back a bit as he reassures you and begins explaining.

-- "dont feel bad though, none of this will matter when we get out of school, yaknow?"

his eyes shift from the paper on the table in front of you both onto your eyes

-- "im matt, by the way."

he mentions his name before quickly leaning away from you, he hadnt realized how close he got to you when explaining.

you nod and smile softly, happy to have had a nice interaction with someone -- specifically a boy, not in a romantic way, really just in the sense that its rare to find a boy your age whos atleast a little bit emotionally mature.

-- "im y/n. thanks for the help, by the way, i really needed it. i had no idea what i was doing"

you mutter with a slight nervous giggle. you and matt soon became close friends, talking everyday in and out of class. he introduced you to his triplet brothers, and his friendgroup. while you didnt fit in with his friends as much as you'd like to, you were grateful you had people to talk to. since then, as the dynamic between you both grew, you became inseperable.

☆☆☆☆

its been 7 years since then, and you and matt are the closest youve ever been. matt knows you better than you know yourself. you cant hide from him the way you hide from yourself.

you currently, though, were on a drive with him. your favorite thing to do was to go on long drives and find some random parking lot to sit in with the windows down, listening to music, talking about random shit, learning about the very few things you both dont already know about the other. you sat in the parking lot of a convience store you didnt care to remember the name of, windows all the way down with the wind gently blowing through your hair.

you always got the aux cord when you rode with matt, he knows how important music is to you. even if he doesnt particularly like the music youre playing, he puts up with it because he enjoys seeing you get excited over certain songs.

"Use Once & Destroy" by Hole played softly through the speakers. matt had turned the radio down so it was easier for you both to focus on each other.

you had the visor down while you looked at your makeup in the mirror, wiping away the smudged eyeliner that had condensed beneath your lower lashes throughout the day.

-- "god, i fucking hate when my makeup does this.."

you mumble to yourself once theres a moment of silence between the two of you.

-- "it makes me look disheveled."

you complain quietly as you flip the visor back up, giving up on your goal of getting rid of the black residue underneath your waterline.

-- "i think you look pretty. i dunno, i dont think you look messy.. it makes you look real, it makes you look like you."

matt says sweetly as he studies you fixing your makeup, seemingly mesmerized by your dedication. you smile softly and tuck your hair behind your ears.

-- "thank you, matti."

you say sweetly to him, studying the look on his face. he turns away for a second as you lean over the center console, expecting to give him a peck on the cheek (..which, is something thats been accustomary in your friendship, its supposedly platonic)

until he turns his head back to face you, your lips landing onto his. you pull back quickly, your eyes growing as you cover your mouth.

his reaction similar to yours, his eyes growing before he starts profusely apologizing.

your cheeks heat up as your mind races, sifting through every thought youve had of moments like this before.

you knew you shouldnt think about your best friend in that position, but you couldnt help it. he was obviously very attractive, and you have always had some romantic feelings for him, whether you admitted it to yourself or not.

matt goes quiet, the awkward silence filling the space small space between you. both of your faces flushed red, studying each other subtly.

usually youd both brush off an interaction like this, but it was different this time. something about the situation maybe, or the subconcious emotions that created tension around you both.

-- "can i kiss you?"

he asks softly after a period of uncomfortable silence that slowly shaped itself into comfort, the way it always does with the two of you.

you nod slightly, the question adding to the absurdity of the moment.

as he leans forward, you mirror his motions until he places one hand on your jaw and the other on the back of your neck, gently intertwining fingers with your hair.

your lips lock and you place your hand on his forearm, the other on his shoulder as the two of you hold the kiss for about 3 seconds before pulling away.

you both stayed in the same position as you smiled widely, your cheeks pink while your eyes shifted away from his, flustered and happy that things werent weird like you thought they might be.

matt brushes your hair out of your face as a smile creeps onto his mouth when he sees the expression on your face.

-- "youre so fuckin beautiful, y/n."

[ghostedeabha]

riley family hcs:

tw: mentions of post-partum depression and psychosis, mentions of self harm, mentions of death/dying/suicide (no actual death though, everyone is alive!!), allusions to ghost's trauma

- matthew is a big batman enjoyer just like his dad, simon got him matching batman stuff all the time growing up

- matthew is also a big softie, big guy like his dad but is just an absolute softie (biggest animal lover fr)

- lyla's first word was tea because simon asks for tea so much when he's home she picked it up from him

- luka's first word was pineapple and it to this day baffles you and simon

- bug and matthew will never admit it's because they trained him to do it

- 90% of what simon drinks when he is home is tea

- he probably asks for tea at least once an hour

- "baby can you make me some tea?"

- "love, are you making tea? can you make me some too?"

- "do you want to have some tea?"

- "oh, while you're up can you grab me a cuppa?"

- atp just keep the kettle on 24/7 when he's home

- bug kept their middle name, it's joeseph <3

- true to their name, bug used to bring all assortments of bugs home with them as a kid

- literally just pulled a mf earth worm out of his pocket one night at dinner when he was 8

- simon and matthew freaked out

- "ew! why did bring that to the table?!"

- "bug you're gonna make me sick, please get that thing away from our dinner..."

- "matthew! simon! be nice!"

- lyla is a big daddy's girl, luka is a mommy's boy

- idk if i mentioned it before but bug uses they/he pronouns (will use she/her to spite people, only ever to spite people)

- matthew has beat up transphobes at school for bug (and would gladly do it again)

- soap tried so hard to convince simon to name a kid after him

- closest he got was matthew's middle name being john (he'll take the win)

- lyla's middle name is valerie (for the sole reason that mummy likes the song valerie a little too much, it kinda pisses simon off because it's so close to valeria but he lives with it and learns to love it every time he sees his lover dancing around the kitchen to the song)

- luka legally doesn't have a middle name, it's supposed to be spencer

- simon may or may not have forgotten to write it down on the certificate

- he was emotional, okay?

- at least he remembered to put his name there at all??

-he misspelled riley by accident the first time and scribbled it out

- when soap found out he refused to let him live it down and reminds him of it every opportunity he gets

- only for simon to remind him of the time bug shoved a snail down soap's throat when he was a child and soap actually ate it so he wouldn't hurt bug's feelings

- shell and all

- soap shuts up quickly after that

- uncle soap <3

- some sad ones comin your way besties

- simon wasnt exactly a good dad for the first couple years of matthew and bugs lives

- you were both young and he was still very unhealed from his (continuously growing) trauma

- a lot of fights were had

- a lot of simon just leaving in the middle of the night out of nowhere

- it took one really bad fight where you completely broke down in front of him for him to realize that he had to get his shit together

- family therapy appointment was booked the next day for as soon as possible

- truthfully he didn't think it would help, he's always been a big therapy hater

- but to his surprise it helped a lot, of course it still took some time and a lot of hard work but he did eventually grow to become a much better father and partner

- luckily by the time matthew and bug were in their most formative years is when simon had become a bit more stable and a better dad

- of course they still had to go through his deployments and the trauma of not knowing if their dad would come home, but they never ever experienced trauma at the hands of simon

- simon actually suffered PPD and PPP alongside you after you had the kids

- neither of you developed PPP until the twins though

- it was a very big struggle for both of you

- there was a short period of time where you actually had your parents take the kids because neither of you trusted yourselves alone with them

- his lasted much shorter than yours did though

- there was a period of time where you were still suffering both PPD and PPP while simon was deployed and it ended up with you and matthew in the hospital

- you hadn't intended to hurt him, he just happened to get in the way of you hurting yourself and you accidentally hurt him as well

- simon didn't find out until he came home from deployment and saw that you weren't alone at home with the kids but instead had hired a nanny who was trained for situations like this

- he felt awful that he couldn't be there for you when you needed someone so badly

- he could've lost you and he wouldn't have known until he came home

- but he didn't

- anyyywaaaayyyys, back to the happy stuff :3

- bug watches markiplier

- matthew watches buzzfeed unsolved (loves watching it with uncle soap<3)

- sleepovers at uncle soap's when he's off of deployment 🥰

- matthew had a habit of bringing random strays into the house from the ages of 6-10

- or even just random wild animals he somehow befriended

- get home from work and he's just sitting there on the couch with a raccoon in his hands

- you just stand there like ????

- "matthew, please get that thing out of my house..."

- "but why? it's nice mummy."

- "i know you think so honey, but it's really not. it's probably very dirty and wants to be left alone. they live outside for a reason, right bud? if they wanted to be in homes, they would be."

- "fine... five more minutes?"

- "two, no more, no less. and that include your saying goodbye time."

- "fine."

[bambaooo]

30.

I know for a fact no one is on here anymore, but doing this has been on the back of my mind for about a week or so.

But I just turned 30. My last almost 15 years of life have been recorded to some extent on here. From my 20s to now my 30s life has been fucking nuts. From going to feeling invincible, to feeling that like everyday is a new challenge of what im going to go through. I remember in like elementary school and middle school, i was like embarrassed of being on the younger end for my class. I would always lie and say that i was born in 93 instead of 94. Such a weird thing. and before i turned 21, i wasnt pressed on going downtown to the bars and clubs cause i know when my time came it would be fine. But gdamn, my 20s are gone. I cant help to reflect on the life ive lived. From college, to my first real job, first time living on my own money, relationships, covid, grad school, and to the last major things of buying a house and getting engaged. like what tf am I doing, in the back of my head im still that one kid that eats a shit ton, works out alot, and smokes hookah. But in reality im not that person anymore lol. i used to be very resistant on change but, i know its inevitable but it does still bums me out a bit. I think it bummed me out before because up until recently, ive been very deprived from my friends. I felt bad reaching out, and I felt like i was being a burden hitting them up. But like now, id rather reach out and see them rather than feel like im missing out. But ive seen more friends in the past few months than I feel like i have in the past few months combined. I know social connection is a big part of being healthy, but i didnt realize it was like that for me. But it makes sense, for almost almos the whole time i was in richmond, i was constantly around friends. but as a real adult that shit is kinda hard, gotta cross reference everyones schedules and shit. but like honestly its better than nothing, and i dont think i could do that shit for a extended amount of time lol. and life is just so fucking different know, fucking mortage and house stuff. and still trying to exercise regularly and be an adult.

i almost never want to plan anything for my birthday cause i dont like that feeling of being a burden or w/e. But it just happned to be that arvin moved back home and we got lunch the day before with matt. and that night we hung out at a hookah bar. Ive been so scared with the random health shit ive been dealing with but hookah actually calmed me down a lot for some reason. and Im trying really hard not to get back into the habit of smoking on a regular basis. after smoking for 10 years man, that shit would fuck me up. not the smoking, but feeling reliant on something. Shit addiction is fucking real. Im blessed to be able to pull myself away from shit like that, but i know in the back of my head i know that shit would feel so nice lol. Even when i was vaping, that shit didnt hit as good as a hookah lol.

but yeah life is different. getting settled in the house, gonna plan for a wedding of some sort in the near future, trying to get the house figured out. life is just fucking wild to me right now.

the 20s i definately learned a shit ton. I feel fucking old talking like that, but like its fucking true. the kids in their 20s now have like no idea how to live like we did. i hope i can get to a point where i can be good mentally and physically to live life a little bit of what i used to. I always hear that the 30s is like your 20s with more money, which makes me hella excited. but yeah, im 30 now, idk the next time ill be on here. ill probably come on here once in a while until it dies off forever. I lowkey want to go back into my shit and read some stuff, but i honestly cant bring myself to dig through that shit lol.

until the next.

[plural-aita]

aita for making nsfw references in a call where a little was present?

this happened a while ago, so the details are pretty fuzzy. i mean all of this in good faith and am open to constructive feedback.

about a year ago i was in a discord call with some people im no longer in contact with. i was dating one of these people, we'll call T, and watching a movie with him and one or two other people in the call. i'm a singlet and T may have been a system (its complicated and i'm not exactly sure what was going on- he told me about having a mass dormancy and how he think it might've just been his severe unmedicated psychosis making him think he was a system. anyways.)

at some point, a person part of a system, i'll refer to them collectively as S, joined the call but wasn't active in the voice chat, so i figured they just wanted to watch quietly and i kept talking to T. the movie we were watching was rated r, so i would make lots of jokes and references to sex and swear a lot, it's just the kind of person i am. during the call i got pinged by T in a text chat (cant remember if it was dms or public) that therw was a little in the call. this threw me off, and T told me to check the vc text chat, and when i went through i saw that S was texting sporadically, but i didnt see a lot to suggest that they said something there about switching alters.

i got kinda uncomfortable at that point and i think i paused the movie and tried to tone down my jokes to more middle school stuff since i didnt know the little's boundaries or how to interact properly in a situation like this. i also wasnt really close with S since they were more of T's friend and they would switch to an alter i'd never talked to before for days on end, which made it difficult for me to connect with them when their host did front (which didnt happen too much).

i think S eventually left the call and we returned to our more mature commentary, but i did feel bad for continuing my inappropriate jokes when T informed me that a little was present. i guess i was expecting the little to be more of a tween aged kid but they ended up being closer to 6 with very VERY babyish interests. nothing against any of that i just wasnt at all prepared for it in the moment

was i the asshole for being a bit dense/slow and awkward when this occurred?

[lazaruspiss]

Justice League x RW/BY: Super Heroes and Huntsmen (Part One)

gonna be honest i kinda keep forgetting that this movie exists. the animation and music is very... rw/by. for better or for worse. corny quippy one liners. it's very corny. adding a cut bc this'll probably get a bit rambly.

AHHH THE FLASHBACK IS A STILL FRAME. the first thing to make me laugh wasnt even a joke it was the single still frame flashback. well. there was a slight zoom?

it's trying to be funny so bad its trying so hard. the serious dialogue is corny but could be worse. overall its better than the crossover comics? making the DC characters teenagers seems pointless.

oh god the dialogue is so hammy. the fists are hammed. weiss good and weiss dad bad yes i noticed. christ im only 8 minutes in. physically recoiling at some of the jokes. like its nothing jokes its nothinggg.

IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE BRUCE? he's been on screen for like 10 seconds and he already sounds and acts like "wealthy teenage tiktok star tries to pander to the less ~economically privileged~" and god it keeps going it hasnt even been a minute yet. did they make them teenagers bc otherwise bruce wouldve run off and found some little boy to help him solve everything without the help of anyone else. is that why. bc honestly yeah adult bruce is hard to write into a team setting.

bruce continues to be embarrassing but also. im learning that the still image flashbacks are just a thing thats gonna happen in this movie. style wise its very much a rw/by movie, so its just probably not gonna hit for me. its the kind of show i watched in middle school and grew out of by 8th grade. even then, my interest kind of started and ended with the character design and the basic world building elements. emphasis on basic, trying to understand the more in depth aspects is a bit of a waste of time.

oh and im still at the 10 minute mark. "ive already gone through all the other dc x rw/by content" i thought, "might as well watch the movies" i thought.

i think theyre trying to write bruce doing a smart detective thing? unfortunately rw/by is very bad at writing people doing smart things. 1) cant stand bruces voice in this 2) god hes so annoying and this whole scene is embarrassing to watch.

GAHH. THE SAME FLASHBACK FRAME CLARK HAD BUT ZOOMED OUT THIS TIME. true cinema. and i think theyre alluding to time travel as well as dimension travel, so even the rw/by girls get to have weird "we're not where we should be" flashbacks.

diana manhandles the small boy, fun. it also rife with required reading bc if you arent fully dedicated to keeping track of all rw/by lore then fuck you. these movies dont seem to require much DC knowledge but they cram in a lot of references to rw/by lore that i only know from video essays put out by ex-fans.

hey guys did u remember that yang is lesbian. pretty cool right? right?? this movie is going by so slow.

MARI IS THAT YOU?? and jess... girls u deserve a better movie. oh vic got braids? nice. also that joke was nothing. all the jokes are nothing.

the best jokes so far have been. the ones about how convoluted and hard to get into rw/by is. because of course. sigh. i do think the DC characters are better utilized and integrated than they were in the comics at least. seeing mari and jess get animated is really cool, and overall i like the redesigns. a few of the characters have commented on suddenly being deaged but mari's acknowledgement of it is the first to feel like a natural line of dialogue rather than exposition.

montage of bruce learning to use his bat powers so that they can get that out of the way before he joins the rest of the group. separate things that were already discussed being re-discussed so that we can have a "everyone talks at once scene". they. what. huh? they had a normal conversation that landed on "lets split into groups since theres enough of us to reasonably do that. then they have an argument which ends at the exact same conclusion.

are they really gonna have a "yang thinks diana is hot and blake gets jealous" plot line? really? and another love triangle. cy tries to ask nora to explain this worlds weapons, noras boyfriend(?) gets mad and then cy gets mad back and ends up being the one everyone gets upset with. it feels a bit. just. super uncomfortable. cy wasnt flirting he was just. talking to nora.

oh thank god that bit is over. now back to jess! possibly the most interesting character here. her design is probably my least favorite of the bunch tho, just because it feel a bit... too anime? it reminds me too much of my danganronpa phase, lol.

jaune doing plot device things. jess introspection. its not the most interesting thing but its better than uh. whatever happened with cy earlier. sorry im still thinking about that. i think they were just going for hormonal and temperamental teenager moment but it uh. came off weird.

plot twist everything was uh. void. ptsd monster things. the plots about to get convoluted isnt it.

diana is pretty decently fleshed out in this one. and it looks like they didnt lean into the diana being hot as a source of relationship conflict that much aside from a few jokes, thank god.

for fucks sake shut up jaune i dont care about your dead girlfriend.

back to the monster fighting group, dear god theyre doing one of those. 2 guys fight over girl who goes "umm i can take care of myself >:(". GOD SHUT UP. FUCK. ITS A JEALOUS LOVE TRIANGLE PLOT. please let this die sooner rather than later.

bruce describes everything that was just established. bruce is emo. weiss tries to be nice. then back to jess and jaune. "i didnt realize how much i miss this place" yeah well i sure dont miss it. oh pyrra, however your name is spelled, you were the only character death that meant anything. now if only they didnt degrade her story into being all about jaune even in death.

have weiss and bruce just been on the computer this whole time. at least they eventually get a fight scene. lesbians to the rescue time. stuff and things. i still dont care and jaune. fuckin. creator self insert ass. he was originally comic relief/audience surrogate but turned into way too much of a main character. god jess deserves her own movie.

weiss please stop trying to recruit him this is just embarrassing. is this gonna be a whole thing? bruce deciding between earth and remnant? and god you cant put anime style gags in the middle of a serious scene. oh god theyre making bruce insecure about not having powers like the rest of the league. man who could've seen that coming. christ theres still 20 minutes left. FUCK AND A WHOLE SECOND MOVIE.

jess remains the coolest bitch in this movie. god why couldnt it be a jess green lantern movie.

lesbians on motorcycles, blah blah fight scene. oh god we're pretending batman is cool. fake flash? wheres real barry then :/ christ. they think this is a cool twist. tho possessed barry is pretty fun. god the actual canon explanation for making them teens was bc kilg%re figured the hormones would make them easier to fuck with.

obligatory "even teens can be leaders" speech. the determination of humanity or whatever.

HAAA BRUCE AND BARRY MORSE CODE COMMUNICATION. ok thats cute.

so smth smth final battle but theres a mysterious second bad guy so that they still have content for a second movie. i like how they show vixen's powers, that parts fun. jess does main character thing and kills big bad. bruces conflict about going home is resolved. cy goes and makes amends with nora and guy who likes nora, despite guy who likes nora being the one to cause all the conflict in the first place. they make the go home portals. set up for next movie.

[wincore]

field day | jung sungchan

pairing: sungchan x fem!reader

synopsis: when you, as cheer captain, are best friends with the pride and joy of the soccer team, rumors are bound to fly around.

genre: high school au, soccer au, bff2l, fluff

words: 7.5k

warnings: language, jung “the risk i took was calculated but man am i bad at math” sungchan

request: sungchan + ball + “ everyone is looking at us. is that a good or a bad thing? ” (from the first option) ^__^

song recs: after school - weeekly / pleaser - wallows / some - bol4 / sweet talk - saint motel / love so sweet - cherry bullet

a/n: i tried recalling some hs memories for this and im hoping i wasnt the only one that went through the “shipped with a random dude” ordeal LOL. i haven’t written shorter fics in a while so i’m glad i got to. tq for requesting, lovepie <33

In high school, peer pressure tends to come in different forms. For you, it’s taken the shape of this.

“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” 

You look around your classmates, scanning each and every face chanting with glee like you’re a star player scoring the winning point. The tall figure shifts beside you, glancing at you like a blinking idiot. You’re not even on the losing team but it feels just as frustrating.

You glare at the boy beside you. The trouble is Jung Sungchan. The trouble has always been Jung Sungchan. 

“Come on!” Chenle calls with a teasing grin from the buzzing crowd. The little shit. It’s getting hotter with each minute you spend by the green soccer field and its dusty chalked lines, just at the tip of the bleachers. You didn’t even get enough time to breathe before you were surrounded, the soccer team pushing a stumbling Sungchan onto you. It’s too sunny for this today.

“The star soccer player gets a kiss from the lead cheerleader after a winning game! That’s the rule.” Chenle announces.

Sungchan looks at you and you turn to him, the both of you looking at each other like fish out of water. Even though you’ve clarified at least a hundred times that you’re just friends, your peers don’t seem to be satisfied. (“Famous last words,” they say.)

“No,” you say, firmly. 

“No,” Sungchan agrees, nodding his head wisely.

“Don’t copy me,” you say, smacking his chest, and a quiet ‘oof’ escapes his mouth.

The fact that you’ve been best friends since Sungchan offered you a light green crayon in elementary school just fuels the idea that you have to date. There’s this difference between elementary school kids teasing and high school kids teasing—it was so much easier back when boys were afraid of cooties from girls. It was innocent too. Now, it’s more of nudges and sly grins, teasing with unnecessary innuendo. (What else do you expect from teenagers experiencing puberty?) It doesn’t stop you from being best friends though. Sungchan still visits on Fridays to get on your mom’s nerves and help you with homework (or try to). You still have all the little trinkets he’s gifted you over the years and the lock to his phone is still your birthday. You’re best friends and strictly that. 

When you got into the same middle school though is when it started going downhill. Holding his hand was awkward, touching him in any way was awkward and god forbid you compliment him on something. The kids around you would run across the halls saying “(name) likes Sungchan!” or the other way around sometimes. Heathens, the lot of them. But at the very least, he wasn’t too fazed and you wonder how he could be that even-tempered. If it was just you feeling that way, then maybe you did like him more than he did you. 

You shake it off. 

Sungchan’s much more grown now and at least a foot taller since his awkward adolescent years; he looks handsomer too but you wouldn’t be caught dead saying it out loud. After all, it’s only going to spark another debate on the anonymous school forum. (“(name) finds Jung Sungchan attractive, they’re totally dating.” “I knew it. A boy and a girl can’t be friends, especially if they’re both good looking.”) If you’re being honest, you hate the rumours so much—it’s one of the reasons, apart from puberty, stopping you from being as close as before. However, you do understand that this is how the passage of time works. You’re not going to be spending all of your time with each other, yes, but you still regard him as important. Your life is too busy now, with exams and practice—and you’d think a busy bee would get some honey as reward.

Sungchan’s curls stick to his forehead, unruly after he wiped at them with a towel. The sunlight plays with his eyes when he looks at you intently and you shrug. The smell of sweat is starting to make you nauseous. You remember that you too need to take a shower.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” you mumble.

“Not today?” He asks.

You shake your head. “The girls have a plan.”

It’s not just the sweat. Or the crowds. You don’t like being here at all. There’s one more problem with this place.

You hate soccer. 

And by hate, you mean you despise it. Like you’ll throw up at the sight of it. What’s so riveting about a bunch of smelly, sweaty guys excited about chasing a patterned ball? You’ve tried to understand it but every time your dad explains the rules, you find yourself zoning out of whatever alien language he speaks. 

Sungchan has been the closest to getting you to understand the game and even then, you refused to learn. It’s not like you’re society’s definition of girly—but you’re not a tomboy either. The school has granted you the “ice queen with a warm interior” stereotype so you’ll just go with that. To be honest, you’re just a little more awkward at open affection than your friends. (And Sungchan has the “friendly beagle” stereotype which you’ll agree is partly true. He’s more of a retriever though, with that size.) It’s just funny how you can never seem to know who you are but other people see so clearly.

You hurry up to the locker rooms and hope for a better evening than this afternoon.

-

The sky burns blue and you wipe the sweat off your brow once you step out of the changing room. Cooling off from your shower has gone to waste. Adjusting your school skirt, you take your usual strides to the school gates. 

Ryujin seems to be showing Yuna a very flamboyant dance move while the latter hypes her up. Ryujin is in her gym uniform because she has no care for her reputation apparently, but she makes it work. Yuna’s about to show her own move when she notices you and waves at you vigorously enough to make you jog towards her and stop embarrassing herself in front of the after school crowd. But then again, she’s too cute for that.

“We got bored waiting for you,” Yuna explains, voice hoarse from her cold. Poor thing wasn’t let into performing because of it. “Do you wanna see our cool new move? Ryujin came up with it!”

Ryujin rolls her eyes. “You’re trying to advertise me to (name) so she can recruit me into cheerleading, aren’t you?”

You smile and cross your arms, facing Yuna who’s been caught mid-act. She smiles sheepishly and pats your shoulder like she just said a funny joke.

“Actually…” You begin and Ryujin holds up her arms in a cross.

“No. Never. I’m already part of the hip-hop dance club.”

“I was going to say that I’ll join you instead.”

Yuna gasps in betrayal, big eyes widening, and Ryujin grins before sticking her tongue out and potentially ruining her image with that expression. She doesn’t care, however.

“Anyway, I can’t wait to get to college and join a dance club.” Ryujin looks at the two of you excitedly. “I keep getting snaps from Yeji and feel so jealous.”

Yuna pouts. “Don’t be so happy about leaving me.”

“Aw, is the baby afraid of not getting any more sisterly doting?” Ryujin teases and you laugh at the disgruntled expression on Yuna’s face. 

“Don’t worry,” Ryujin continues with a sly grin. “Taehyun’s here to keep you company for another year.”

Yuna turns red in the face, a high pitched complaint emitting from her throat. “I told you to keep quiet about that!”

“Oh, what’s this?” You wiggle your eyebrows. “We’re starting boy talk early today.”

Yuna huffs. “At least, mine’s just a crush. I don’t know what relationship status: complicated you have going on with Mr. Soccer Captain.”

You flush hotly. “There’s no relationship status to be complicated about! Seriously, why does everyone think we’re a thing?”

“You’re cheer captain and he’s soccer captain,” Ryujin answers logically. “Plus, you’re best friends.”

“You have a lot of sexual tension,” Yuna answers honestly.

You make a face, slipping your arms into theirs and pulling them along the sidewalk. You better get something to drink before the sky starts to turn purple from pink tinged blue. 

“Ooh, another desperate attempt from (name) to not get teased,” Ryujin leans back to whisper to Yuna.

You stop walking. “Wait. Where are we going?”

Yuna shakes her head. “I’ll lead the way.”

Skipping over the concrete sidewalk, you laugh at your friends and their stories (read: Ryujin gushing over Yeji’s college dance club and Yuna’s newfound crush on Taehyun). The blue sky has tinged orange by now but it’s the sort of colour that sits in between more significant timeframes, like night and evening. Passing by a city square, you eye the people with wonder. A girl in a pink skirt skateboards smoothly over the concrete, her boyfriend filming her with a loving smile. 

“We’re here!” Yuna announces.

You look around the large open plaza, with people of all ages and in different attires trying out skateboarding and rollerblading over the grey concrete. It’s been getting popular lately, with idol pop stars taking to it too but you never knew there was this big a community. There seems to be a few stalls renting out skateboards too. The wind caresses your hair, evening cool settling in nicely on your skin. The sky is purple but it’s lit up with the city buildings and street lamps flickering on. It’s not a bad day at all.

Someone catches your attention. A boy that sticks out like a sore thumb everywhere he goes. 

“Sungchan?!” 

Your eyes somehow always settle on his figure, tall and standing out in the crowd of teenagers. He clutches his blue bag, the one he’s had since third grade, close to his chest and looks more like a tourist in this place than a frequent visitor. He’s not the only one in school uniform now that you’re here.

“(name)!” 

You hate how you love the way his face lights up when he sees you. You’re not actually into him. It’s your friends brainwashing you.

“I was going to invite you,” Sungchan says, a sorry smile on his face. 

Ryujin and Yuna frown at each other but you can’t exactly ask the reason for it.

“Isn’t it great we had the same plans?” he beams at the three of you.

Yuna suppresses a smile and you wonder why. It’s not like your friends would know he’d be here—you’d know first as best friend.

"How did you guys come across this place?" He asks, eyes round with curiosity. 

"Somi's Tiktok," Yuna answers, smiling. "We thought she works here but if she really was, guys would be swarming this place."

Ryujin raises her eyebrows. "Speaking of which, I can clearly see why there are so many girls here."

Sungchan beams, turning to you for affirmation and when you don't give him any, he drops his grin to a more polite smile.

“I don’t work at the stalls though,” he answers. “I’ve just been here a few times.”

“You’re trying to learn, aren’t you?” Ryujin asks, raising an eyebrow.

He nods. However, you furrow your eyebrows at her. How does she know? Eyes widening, you realize it must be the school forum. You remember reading a post about a student wanting to learn skateboarding and the wording felt familiar but you didn’t think much. How they figured it out, you will never know.

“Oh! Oh, I think my nose is bleeding. Oh god.” Yuna sniffs vehemently, her finger at her nose. “I think I’m going to need Ryujin to get me to a clinic.” 

Linking her arm through Ryujin’s, Yuna makes an apologetic expression and runs off into a particularly crowded area.

You blink. The realization dawns. 

"They just left me," you tell him, exasperated. "How could they just leave me?"

He shrugs. "My team left me at a rival school's field once."

Great. Your last outing before midterms and your friends have abandoned you. If this is the case, you wonder why they complain about you spending so much time with Sungchan and allegedly ignoring them.

You regain a sense of your surroundings and turn to him. "Wait. They really left you?"

He nods diligently, eyes trained upwards as he tries to recall the memory. "I told you, didn’t I? On the plus side though, I made friends with the opposite team."

"That's so… cute."

Your cheeks heat up at saying it out loud. If Sungchan is affected by it in any way, he doesn't show it. Instead, he has his usual smile on. 

“Do you wanna try?” he asks. “Skateboarding. Or rollerblading but I personally don’t recommend that.”

He curls his lips, shaking his head slightly. You laugh. Of course this beanpole has trouble balancing on skates.

"I- I figured you'd be good at skateboarding. Since, you know, you're so balanced and all."

You raise an eyebrow. "You wanna add skateboarding to your resume or something?"

"Yeah, that and the ability to imitate dog sounds. Wanna see?"

"No, thanks. I’ll pray this weekend to cure your furry behaviour."

Before he can respond, you’re interrupted by a whirlwind of colours and excited calls. A few girls run up to the two of you, younger and probably in middle school, flocking to Sungchan like bees to honey. Never in your life have you felt so ignored as in this singular moment.

You blink, turning to Sungchan who looks like a rather helpless, flustered eye of the hurricane. The winds don't seem to be stopping any time soon.

You clear your throat trying to get their attention. 

"Wow, you brought your girlfriend?" One of the girls exclaims, sounding disappointed.

The other girls make similar whines of disappointment and you have half the heart to whack them over the head and tell them to focus on their academics instead of boys. 

"You're so lucky to have him as your boyfriend," a girl comments, round eyes brimming with jealousy. 

“He’s not my boyfriend,” you declare sharply.

Sungchan looks at you with his doe eyes, blinking cartoonishly. You nudge him with your elbow.

“Yeah!” He agrees, with far too much gusto to be believable. “I’m not (name)’s boyfriend. I have no idea why everyone keeps saying that.”

“Let’s go, babe,” you say, resisting the urge to stick your tongue out at the girls. They’re younger than you and you have high school dignity, you remind yourself.

Slipping your hand into his, you take a few long strides away from them before you realize what you said.

“I- I did- I didn’t mean to call you babe,” you sputter, pulling your hand from his to look at him with wide eyes. 

“It’s okay though?”

Sungchan raises an eyebrow and slips his hand back into yours, smiling. 

“I don’t mind the rumours, you know?” He says honestly but his smile feels all too teasing. “Maybe we should go out for real.”

You huff, separating yourself from him again. “Maybe you just love attention. Disgusting.”

You point an accusatory finger at him and he bites at it playfully.

“While you're here, wanna see a cool trick I learned?" He straightens only having to tilt his head to look at you.

"If it's you falling on your face, then yes."

"I mean, hey, I could totally do that. Done that several times actually."

You smile despite trying your hardest not to. You like this about him—that he’s easygoing enough to make you look at life less seriously. If it’s with him, you could quit everything that makes you unhappy and start everything you love. 

“So where is your skateboard?” you ask, walking side by side with him, who has finally learned to match your pace.

“It’s with one of my friends,” he answers, and points to a tall girl with long brown hair, wearing a pair of tomboyish shorts and T-shirt. Another girl with short hair and a bucket hat accompanies her, wearing a long hoodie and shorts, but she leaves before you reach them. They must be from a different school because you’ve never seen them before. The first thing that pops into your head is that they’d be good replacements for your cheerleading position if you were ever to leave. You shake your head. Now is not the time.

“That’s Jimin!” he introduces, and you wonder how he’s this way—how he makes friends so easily.

Jimin waves at Sungchan and then proceeds to ask if you’re his girlfriend with a big smile, like a script being followed everywhere you go.

She seems a little disappointed at the answer. “Well, I was going to suggest one of the couples skateboards.”

You flash her an awkward smile. 

“But those are pretty difficult! I’ve been here for a month and my idea of skateboarding is still sitting on it while Soeun pushes me around. That’s my friend, by the way.”

“Ah.” You nod. “This is my first time skateboarding, actually. The only ‘sport’ I’ve ever done is cheerleading.”

Jimin furrows her eyebrows before her eyes widen. “Wait a minute. You’re the cheerleader best friend that Sungchan wouldn’t shut up about!”

Sungchan flusters, in the subtle way he usually does, and waves his hands robotically trying to explain. “I was just saying- that- that you’d be good at skateboarding. Because of the cheerleading.”

A boxy grin accompanies his explanation. 

“Right.” Jimin covers her face and sends an obvious wink your way. “Anyway, you can have my skateboard for the day.”

She hands over a smooth black skateboard with white wheels, but on closer inspection you find that they’re light-up wheels instead. It’s oddly fitting for someone like Jimin even if you’ve known her the entirety of ten minutes. Sungchan is good at finding friends, rather. Soon enough, she runs off after making Sungchan promise he’ll deliver the skateboard home.

The trick Sungchan wanted to show you was a failed kickflip. At the very least, it made you laugh so hard you almost spit out the strawberry milk he’d bought you. Sipping his own banana milk, he sulked for a moment or two, telling you to try it out and see how difficult it is.

On the contrary, Sungchan was right. You are good at balancing on skateboards. But that’s where it ends. You don’t think you’ll be naturally good at kickflips, though being able to glide through the plaza while Sungchan runs after you with the drinks puts a big smile on your face. It’s the most fun you’ve had in a while.  

Accompanied by Sungchan’s panicked “oh no”s and “oh we messed up”s, the two of you try the couple skateboarding move too; no one’s watching you here. It’s fun to see him stress over a skateboard because frankly, you’ve never met anyone as easy-going as Sungchan. (“I’ll figure it out along the way,” he says when you ask if he’s studying for finals, and proceeds to get a decent enough score). Suddenly the wandering gap is closed again. You’re not going to worry about stupid rumours from now on. 

But for some reason, ‘you like him as a friend’ doesn’t sound right either. Despite having said it so many times, you might not believe in it. You shake off the thought. This evening, at least, you’re going to enjoy with Sungchan without thinking of teenage drama and hormones. 

"You still don't think you and Sungchan make the perfect pair?" Yuna pouts. 

You narrow your eyes. "I don't take opinions from traitors."

Chaeryoung leans back on her chair, and whispers to you asking if you’re okay. At least someone is concerned about you.

“It hurts to be left by my own friends but—”

“No, I meant, are you okay? Why aren’t you dating Sungchan already? You’re so cute together! And you’re best friends—Netflix writers literally daydream of this.”

You groan, throwing up your hands in defeat.

“And,” Yuna adds, knocking her chair closer. “Who’s really the traitor here? Us who ditched you with the love of your life—or you, who runs off every time she gets a call from her boyfriend?”

“Sungchan is not my boyfriend.” You cross your arms.

“She even shares her lunch with him more,” Ryujin complains from the side. “And they’re not even in the same class. Unlike me, by the way. Class 1 Shin Ryujin. Same class as you, (name).”

You slump, resting your forehead against the desk. At this point, you wish the teacher would walk in and start the class already. Unfortunately, lunch break isn’t over for another ten minutes and lady luck clearly isn’t smiling upon you. 

“Speak of the devil!” Ryujin announces monotonously, leaning against her desk.

Sungchan and a few of his friends from the soccer team wave at you and the girls from the classroom door. Noticing Taehyun, Yuna quickly fixes her hair and you would tease her if Sungchan hadn’t casually strolled up to your desk and sat down on the chair in front of you. Long legs barely contained in the space, he adjusts himself by resting his arm on the headrest and his chin upon it. It’s all normal. However, when he leans down to match your eye level, you hear the sudden pit-a-pat of your pulse in your ear. At this proximity, you can even see the mole on his lip that he’s pointed out before. The sunlight from the open windows is pulling golden strings over his eyelashes and his lips aren’t dry as a desert like you expected. You know he uses the watermelon flavoured lip balm. 

“Too close,” you croak. Embarrassed at your own voice, you rise sharply and glare at him.

“Is your heart fluttering?” Sungchan asks, smiling as he looks up at you.

You roll your eyes. 

You can hear Yuna’s giggling and before you can shoot her a glare, Sungchan calls. 

"Do you have any bandaids?" 

He points to a rough scratch at the base of his palm, fingers slender and less calloused than what you'd pictured. Then again, soccer players don't use their hands much, do they?

You blink. "You came all the way here for bandaids?"

"Well… I remembered you keep band-aids in your phone case. And the nurse hates me."

You giggle.

Yujin mouths from behind Sungchan, “He just wanted to see her.” 

You would feel flattered if you didn't know these people and their shenanigans. They'd do anything for some drama (and to get two innocent people into the dating trap).

“Why would I waste my cute band aids on you?” you mutter under your breath. “They’re limited edition, you know?”

No way are you sticking Ice Bear on your urban hazard of a best friend. A tall, cute, surprisingly polite hazard but he still annoys you nonetheless.

However, Sungchan's pleading smile has grown on you.

You reluctantly take the band-aid out of your clear phone case, the pink panda doll attached to it swaying with the movement. Proceeding, you take Sungchan's hand and lay it on your desk. With careful focus, you place the band-aid, admiring the size difference of your hands before snapping to reality.

Enough with the pink cloud of thoughts, you scold yourself.

When you look up, the proximity makes your heart skip a beat despite the logical part of you saying you shouldn't. Your faces are too close and this time, you don't even have the energy to croak it out.

"Thanks, (name)," Sungchan smiles at you. 

Right then, the sound of a chair sliding harshly against the floor makes the two of you jolt away from each other. All of your friends and his friends seem to be sporting Cheshire cat grins and you don't like it one bit. You don't like not being in on the gag.

"Anybody up for gaming after this? My treat." Chenle looks around. “Sungchan is banned from the arcade soccer game though.”

"'Ey," Sungchan complains.

"Hey, Jisung and Ryujin are banned from DDR too but that's because they almost broke the handles off last time."

The memory makes you smile. Sungchan was there too, and you don’t know why you’re only just recalling all the memories with him in it, carefully and in detail. Every one of them seems to have been amplified, the little interactions suddenly coming to mind. 

“(name)? You’re coming?”

You take one look at Sungchan and give up. Even if this is another childish ploy by your peers, you don't mind spending some more time at the arcade with infuriatingly addictive games. A tiny part of you is even willing to go along with them and see if it turns out the way they want it to.

“I’ll go,” you mumble, and the rest of the group cheers. 

“But I have cleaning duty today.”

The group groans. 

“Just get someone else to do it. Like a junior.”

“Isn’t that bullying?” You ask, frowning.

“Ask nicely. Anyone would be willing to do your bidding, (name).”

“Chenle, will you do it?” You give him a sickly sweet smile. “You’re class president after all.”

Chenle wrinkles his nose. “You’re getting stupider every day, (name).”

You sigh. “Fine. I’ll ask one of Yuna’s classmates then.”

“By the way,” Chenle announces. “Only twelfth graders are invited—”

A bunch of groans interrupt him. 

“Quit whining.” He crosses his arms, glaring at them. “What do you even have to worry about? We’re preparing for the exam of our lives. Oh, and Jisung is an exception.”

“We’re only two years apart,” Yuna mutters under her breath.

“Oh, and from class 5, only Sungchan is invited.”

Another round of complaints pass and Chenle breaks into laughter. “Just kidding.”

Your friends are and will always be an odd bunch. Sungchan has previously proved to be the weirdest (several times) and it makes him the most lovable too. But then again, you don’t have free space in your timetable to put in teenage crushes, much less falling for your best friend. What you do have time for this afternoon, however, is relaxing at the arcade. 

-

“Let’s go! I am so good at this. Think I’d impress your Steve Curry?” Ryujun gloats, after having scored three hoops in a row at the arcade basketball game.

“It’s Stephen Curry,” Chenle corrects. “And no, let’s focus here. Our goals are—”

He points to the two figures by the DDR machine, looking like a real couple. He’s been acting as damage control for the rumours and making sure you don’t drift apart because of it. They really don’t make guys like him anymore, Chenle sighs. He should get a friendship award or something.

“—those two.”

Really, Sungchan better be thanking him by the end of this. He’s never met anyone quite like Jung Sungchan, especially because Chenle cannot picture himself liking the same person since elementary school.

“Man, now I wish I had a girlfriend,” Chenle mutters.

Ryujin snorts. “Who’s going to date you?”

“You don’t have a boyfriend either,” Chenle reminds and gets a basketball to the shoulder.

“Why are you playing that when you don’t even know how to use it?” Your voice rings through to them.

“I said I’ll figure it out!” Sungchan reasons.

Chenle and Ryujin stare at the two of you blankly, as you bicker over a claw machine game and they share a look.

“Do they need our help?” Ryujin whispers.

Chenle shakes his head. “I think they’ll figure it out from here.”

Soon enough, you were laughing at Sungchan’s failed attempts and trying to outplay him. Your friends have already given you the shove. Chenle and Ryujin share a high five and that’s where the new story begins.

You finally know the thrill of a teenage crush. It makes you so damn infuriated that it had to be Jung Sungchan. 

Now every time he waves at you from the field or hands you a bottle of strawberry milk or explains the calc notes you missed or does the bare minimum, you need to deal with the quickening of your pulse and a few butterflies loose from their cage in your stomach. It doesn’t help that you’re almost always together.

The two of you currently sit by the school field, Sungchan tying his shoelaces while you cool off with the water bottle he offered you. Practice ended a while ago for you and the girls have receded into the air conditioned indoor gym. The indoor gym is apparently occupied by the gymnast club and you couldn’t be more disappointed that you didn’t join them instead. 

If anything, however, you’d rather leave this whole thing and focus on your academics. Hobbies shouldn’t be draining you—they should feel like skateboarding on a lilac evening with the wind in your hair.

With a friend you like very, very much.

“Sungchan,” you call quietly. 

“Hm?” 

When he looks up, you can’t hold in the urge to fix the hair out of his eyes. You’ve never been very physically affectionate so it might have come off strange. Sungchan looks at you quietly, stars in his eyes and you clear your throat.

“How long have you been playing soccer? It was before we met, right?”

He hums, eyes traveling up and then back to you when he remembers. “Since I was six. You were there at my first soccer match actually.”

“I was? Oh my god, was it the one you lost horribly and the whole team started crying?”

“Yes. Yes, it was.”

You giggle. “Six year old you would be so in awe now.”

Sungchan beams at that. 

“Who knows?” he smiles, looking into your eyes with firm determination. “Maybe I’ll be the next Son Heungmin.”

“Even I know who that is so… no.”

Sungchan pouts and you make a face in disgust. “Don’t act cute, it gives me hives.”

“Okay, maybe not Son Heungmin. I could definitely be the next Park Jisung—and I don’t mean him.”

Sungchan points to a boy passed out on the benches, his exhaustion typical of any high schooler while another boy sits beside him, fanning him with a bunch of assignment papers. Jisung and Chenle really are more entertaining than any game on this field. 

You turn to look at Sungchan, who’s moving his head around trying to catch their attention. When he finally does, he waves at them and gets big grins in response. He’s not all that bad, you think. In fact, he’s quite possibly the most amiable boy in senior year.

“Just be Jung Sungchan,” you mutter. “Not Son Heungmin or Park Jisung.”

Sungchan turns to you, smiling wide. “Advice taken.”

You scoff. “Whatever.”

Maybe it’s just you but Sungchan has been glancing at your lips very frequently today and mentally thank Chaeryoung for letting you borrow her lip tint. You didn’t know something so subtle could get you this giddy.

“Are you… going to give the CSAT?” You ask, glancing at him nervously. Part of you is sad you only developed your first high school crush in the very last semester. Or if it’s comforting, you could believe you’ve liked him all this time.

“Nah. Sports scholarship,” he says nonchalantly. “I was going to tell you but… I’ve been scouted already.”

You gasp. “That’s… great. Your future’s all settled.”

Sungchan seems to dislike the idea, lips pursing. “I don’t think anything’s settled except for the next step.”

You nod, somewhat understanding. 

“What about you?” He asks. “Any university in mind? SKY? I’ve seen you study extra hours at the library.”

You look away, not feeling ready for the conversation.

“I don’t know,” you say quietly. “I don’t know what I like and what I want. I don’t even like cheer anymore.”

Sungchan gazes at you wordlessly but it’s the most comfortable you’ve felt talking about this.

“Maybe I should quit,” you mumble.

You don’t want to commit to something you no longer have passion for. But then again, you’ve spent so much time on it that it’s hard to leave. 

“You should,” he responds, honest. 

You scoff, shaking yourself from that moment of vulnerability. “But why would I quit something I’m good at?”

“If you don’t like it. If it hurts to leave but isn’t any better when you stay, you should leave.”

You roll your eyes. “You’re quite the philosopher.”

“I’m smart, right?”

You smile. 

“Oy, you two!” Chenle calls, making his way to you two with Jisung trailing behind. “I don’t mean to interrupt your flirting but you got a spare water bottle?”

“Are you two going out now?” Jisung asks as a follow-up, and you feel a hot flush for some reason, unlike the previous times you’ve been asked this question.

“No,” you answer. You don’t mind the idea though now.

“Don’t lie,” Chenle complains. “I saw that picture of Sungchan teaching you how to kick a ball. You? And soccer? Something’s up.”

You throw up your hands in exasperation. “Seriously, who keeps up posting to the school page? And where do they get the time?”

"Two people with this much compatibility will always be a hot topic."

"We're not compatible," you retort quickly.

"Wait," Jisung says. "I know how to resolve this."

You raise an eyebrow.

"How do you have your cereal?" He asks, looking from you to Sungchan.

"Cereal first, obviously," you answer.

Sungchan looks up, finger below his chin as he thinks. "I drink the milk first, then eat the cereal and then breakdance to mix it all together."

You pinch your nose. "I swear I question your sanity all the time."

"Hah! That means you're thinking about me all the time."

You look away, rolling your eyes. He responds with an open-mouthed smile and finger guns.

"See?" Jisung grins. "Compatible."

The gruff voice of Coach Lee startles the four of you and Sungchan leaves with a sigh and a promise of meeting after practice. Jisung leaves with Sungchan and Chenle gives you one last teasing smirk before sitting down and going through the assignment papers he was using as a fan previously. You will never understand his miraculous ways of performing his presidential duties.

You don’t have a good feeling about the next match. The only reason you’re even sticking around anymore—as embarrassing as it—is to spend more time with Sungchan. Being with him puts you at ease, even if the school tries to wrap the two of you in a rope of uneasiness. This is your very last practice, for the next match is the final one of this year and then you’ll be back to spending even longer hours at the library with a stack of textbooks. It’s supposed to be a carefree age. At least, adults say that. Your high school life seems to be riddled with worries, and with that thought, you head into the air conditioned room to take a breather off your anxieties. 

Only one more match, you remind yourself. 

The pre-match buzz is driving you to the edge.

Your form is off, you can feel it already and Coach Kim isn’t as sunshine-as-rainbows as she usually is, courtesy to it being the last match of your life. She’ll never know though, how much you don’t want to do this. 

Sungchan waves at you as he usually does before a match, disappointing a third of his fangirls, but it helps you ease. One last time, (name).

Watching the crowd of people, parents and siblings and friends, all excited and talking makes you take a deep breath. You practiced but it wasn’t good enough. You can never do well at something you don’t like anymore. This time, you feel guilty for committing to things half-heartedly. You want to start that fresh new college chapter already, with all of this behind.

There’s ten minutes left. You go back to the empty hall outside the lockers only to pace. This isn’t helping.

“(name)!”

You turn around abruptly to find Sungchan’s tall figure, and you must be looking miserable because his smile falls.

He doesn’t even ask what’s wrong, only takes careful steps towards you. “Do you need water? Medicine?”

His hands hover over your shoulder but he doesn’t burden you with them. You put your face in your palms and sigh, sinking down to the floor in a crouch.

“I want to quit,” you whisper. Your voice comes off more brittle than you’d like, and you realize that Sungchan hasn’t seen you cry since seventh grade when you failed a math test. You didn’t tell him then but you appreciated him studying extra hours for math just to teach you.

“You don’t have to go out there if you don’t want to,” he says quietly, dropping to the floor beside you. “I’ll stay with you.”

You stare at him dumbfounded. “Don’t be ridiculous! They’ll lose without you—you’re the ace, Sungchan!”

“There will always be an ace,” he retorts. “Maybe Jisung will finally get to shine. Or anyone else. I don’t mind spending an hour with you alone.”

You feel a hot flush spread over your cheeks. Looking away to the side, you mumble an ‘alright’ and only glance from the corner of your eye to see him smiling. Jung Sungchan is the most unreasonable boy you’ve ever met. Perhaps it makes him somewhat loveable too.

“It’s your last match,” you whisper helplessly.

“I’ll join the college soccer club and get to play more matches.”

You sigh, giving in. If he’s so adamant, you think that perhaps there is something in you worth sacrificing his game over. It makes an oddly warm feeling bloom in your chest. Sungchan is so damn convincing with his words. You wonder if it’s really okay.

With shoulders touching, an awkward silence takes over in the next second. You turn to him and open your mouth, watch him do the same and close it at the same time he does.

“You know,” he begins, “I was kind of lying about not worrying because I get the feeling coach will evaporate me tomorrow but—I can handle it. Mostly.”

You stare at him with wide, worried eyes. “You don’t have to do this, Sungchan. I’m the one running away.”

You slouch, pulling your knees closer to your chest and burying your face in them. The urge to scream is boiling within you but you can’t get caught. Not now.

“Sometimes to run is the brave thing,” he responds, insightful. “If you’re not up for it, it’s better to quit early than to regret it in the long run.”

You don’t know if it’s the fact that he just quoted Taylor Swift or spoke like your old school counselor—but you find yourself laughing. He makes sense. Sungchan, in his weird, oddball ways, always makes sense. And in that same way, he feels like home.

“You’re so good to me,” you say, looking up at him and at a proximity you’ve never been before.

It’s his turn to fluster, though he doesn’t do so as visibly as you do. He clears his throat, shifting his eyes around before meeting yours. “I- This is bad timing but… I like you. I really do. Since third grade when you drew that birthday card for me. I have it in my bedside drawer, by the way.”

He looks away and makes a face, probably wondering why he said that out loud.

You press your lips tight to prevent the smile that tugs at them. He looks at you with a wobbly smile, trying his hardest to resume his usual dignity—but he’s just a boy, after all. 

“My type is dumb and pretty, though?” You tease, the smile escaping. “You said it yourself.”

He blinks. “Well, I am pretty but if you want me to be stu—”

You shake your head. “I like you too. You don’t have to act cute.”

He pauses, thinking. “I have never acted cute in my life ever. I was born cu—”

You hold his face between your thumb and forefinger. “You do that again and you die.”

He breaks into a smile. 

“I’ve never met someone quite like you,” you whisper, embarrassed of your own feelings bubbling up from the bottle you had kept them in.

He laughs, open-mouthed and pretty. 

“Actually, hey, I didn’t like you all this time from fifth. I liked you and then I didn’t like you and then I liked you again—”

“Okay, I get it.”

His shoulders relax and he smiles at you. You look up at the clock on the wall by the entrance to the field and bite your lip. You don’t love performing anymore but you know all the girls do, even the stand-bys. Jisung might not have to take over Sungchan’s position but you bet one of those tenth graders would love to take yours, the same way you did back then. They’ve practiced harder than you too and it’s only a matter of deserving.

You take a deep breath and get up, pulling up Sungchan by the hand. He raises an eyebrow, inquisitive eyes scanning over your face and you smile at him, strengthening your resolve. You should have done this way sooner.

-

Sungchan plays. You don’t let him sit it out with you. 

Halfway through, you cheer the hardest you ever have, plastic decorative gemstones stuck by your eyes borrowed from the other girls cheering. It’s much more fun, you think. You’ve never experienced soccer like this. You’d love to sit at stadiums and join in victory chants. There’s enough weight off your chest to yell your lungs out.

Sungchan scores a goal almost immediately after and sends a thumbs up over to you. You laugh. This is the best break you’ve ever taken from cheerleading. 

“Ooh, is this perhaps the (name) effect?” Chenle’s voice rings through the speakers and you feel yourself shrink slightly under the eyes. Out of the corner of your eye, you can see your homeroom teacher signal very angrily to the commentator box. You shake yourself off it. So what if everyone’s looking?

Sungchan places his hands on his hips, chest heaving and sends another signal to you before beelining for a straight goal. You whoop and the girl with a notebook beside you is visibly annoyed at this point but you don’t care. 

Without doubt, your school wins and you watch as Sungchan runs to his team, a big smile on his face. The second he’s done getting pet by the team, however, he rushes to the bleachers, skipping over the steps to you, panting when he stops. The risk he took was definitely not calculated. He holds up one finger while he heaves.

“My cheering worked best this time, it seems,” you say to him, laughing.

His face is flushed from the exertion but he laughs heartily. “You could be yelling profanity at me and it’d still encourage me.”

You shake your head at the cheesy line. He takes a step forward, well inside your space but you don’t mind. He leans in.

“Everyone is looking at us,” he says under his breath. “Is that a good or a bad thing?”

You look behind him to find the whole team, along with your girls sharing furtive glances and giggling at the sight of the two of you. A few of the junior girls slap each other’s arms, bouncing on the balls of their feet in excitement. You’re not a celebrity. But everyone wants to cheer things on once in a while, don’t they?

“Good,” you answer, before pulling him by the shirt into a chaste kiss. When you pull apart, Sungchan’s face is so struck with awe that you want to look away but instead you bite back an obvious smile. It’s about damn time, someone from the soccer team yells.

“Woah. I think I scored a goal either way,” he says, an offbeat smile on his face.

“Oh come on, we didn’t even get to chant ‘Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!’ yet—oh shit, the mic’s on.”

Chenle is definitely getting an earful from your teacher after this. The two of you wave at him at the box and end up laughing at him trying to hide behind the desk. 

As expected, the whole crowd surrounds the two of you in less than a minute’s worth of time, with several congratulations and “good score” offered to the two of you. The boys mess up Sungchan’s hair while the girls compliment you on how cute a couple you are. There’s also the question of when you started dating that pauses the buzz and makes everyone look to the two of you for an answer. Sungchan turns to you and you turn to him, and there’s no way you’ll tell half the school that your confession came in a private hallway outside the field—teenage imaginations run wild. 

Instead, you slip your hand into Sungchan’s and run down the bleachers and towards the exit, laughter spilling from your lips. There’s only one place you can think of going to spend a cool blue late afternoon with.

“Skate plaza?” He asks.

“Skate plaza,” you answer.

[kemikoko]

uhM.. ive never actually used this account for my weird ramblings and such but !!! i have a new thing to ramble about so enjoy my nonsense !! :)

tw: mentioned child neglect and fnaf lore being confusing.

—

Okay this is about micheal and c.c(and elizabeth) and how there bond would realistically(as realistically as possible for fnaf) go!

okay so first i would like to say every sibling bond is different this is just my take on these dudes so if you have a different opinion good for you!! anyways lets start for real now. :)

okay so micheal or foxybro and c.c are known not to have the best relationship and thats like really common i litterly fought with my twin last night but the difference is that micheal is like a teen and c.c is at least 7(seven) or 8(eight) meaning theres a huge age difference so theres that. And also william probably is almost never at home or is busy working meaning elizabeths main role model is micheal meaning she would probably either bully kids at school or bully c.c at home or both. ( and also no one has really told micheal "that hey thats not really okay dude stop it.")

Meaning micheal or foxybro is helping elizabeth be shaped into this bully who doesnt know any better because she see's someone older doing it and thinks its okay. of course she has other role models or adults but her main one is micheal thats her brother. that's who she is with the most. Thats who she grows up with. ( and its also making micheal think even more that its okay to just bully c.c despite the fact its not and even then he should know better hes like a teenager.)

But of course with bad comes good. if you have a sibling that you bullied you or you got bullied by you'll here your parent(s) or guardian saying "You have to stop this. If something bad happens to me/us you'll only have each other." and while for the most part thats true.

they didnt seen each other for 40(forty)(?) plus years before meeting again so eh but its fnaf so. bUT realistically speaking if something did happen its true Micheal will have to take care if both elizabeth and c.c because we can safely assume Mrs. Afton isnt there she left or just died earlier.

And since william more than likely is almost always busy mike probably has had to take care for both if them when he isnt there. And micheal can say he hates c.c and bully him all he wants but deep down no matter how much he denys it he loves his little brother and he would more than likey do anything for him and elizabeth.

It doesnt matter how much he bullies c.c their stuck together. their brothers and they love each other no matter what because even if you say you hate family deep down you love them. ( sometimes!!!! not always !!!!! )

moving onto c.c and his death (Tw: talks of child death and once again fnaf lore being confusing !!)

—

okay so here comes the confusing part. So everyone has different AU's and stuff and i have not completely figured mine out yet but for right now ill just start talking.

So mike is the reason c.c died. simple as that. but its not because some people would hold grudges and some people wouldnt and c.c is an eight year old who now has a whole bunch of head trauma and memory issues. because there is no way in hell that fredbear did not crush his whole head like >:/.

anyways meaning c.c probably doesnt remember who the hell killed him or that hes dead but if he does i feel like he wouldnt know how to feel on one hand he would probably be very very upset but an a different hand he would also know that micheal wasnt trying to kill him. so he would just be stuck in the middle.

he would probably hold a grudge for a while but seeing as c.c is like probably eight(8) it would be one of those grudges he forgets after an hour or so. But also i can all assume that all the afton's are petty because ??????????? and c.c probably wouldnt talk to micheal at first if they ever met up again if he did remember who killed him but if he didnt remember he would probably be terrified of him still because yaknow...... mike bullied him....

but if c.c did hold a grudge and never wanted to see mike again i feel like mike would probably see that as understandable i mean he did kill him. but it wasnt completely his fault that also probably wasnt his intentions. once again confusing and it depends on if you make c.c forgive him or not.

i personally see it as he doesnt forgive him now at all and it would take like a while for him too. but since he has matured since then its easier for c.c to trust him not all the way but enough.

oh!! oh!! another thing me personally i feel like william does but also doesnt love his kids like when he first met them he hated them but they started growing on him and he's a bit neglectful but he A.) he either doesnt notice or B.) he's working on it but failing.

anyways!! thank you for reading this the whole way through. i am so sorry its not more neat i just.... idk man my thoughts are weird and this is just me rambling. uhm. ill try to update more on this account but yaknow....school....and..stuff...

okay anyways bye !!! happy holidays !!!! :DD

[scott-mccall-the-hot-girl]

theodore raeken: missing persons

( okay so i kinda had an idea ,, and then went through the whole teen wolf timeline to see if it would work ,, so here it is !!

theo’s backstory !! it started off way more messy headcannon format & then it got kinda a real story vibe ,, def thinking about making it an ao3 one shot eventually )

-

TW: very sad & hurt my feelings

don't imagine:

eight year old theo raeken...

who sleeps at his best friend scott mccall's house almost every single night, stiles is almost always there too.

theo and his friends where they all watch movies together until ungodly hours of the morning. stiles loved star wars, theo will never forget that. they had gone as luke, han and chewy for halloween that previous year. melissa went as leia. scott has always been more of a indiana jones fan himself. theo would watch either, anywhere where harrison ford was theo didn't mind being.

in this little trio, who were all raised in the mccall house, where they were given eveything they needed. sometimes when theo thought about her, when he needed to remember the good things in life. he never quite knew how she managed. expecially with scott's dad who floated in and out of the picture.

yet, it always was melissa who gave scott extra lunches to take to school because theo and his sister, who were often forgotten by their parents usually were left to fend for themselves and a fourteen year old girl rarely had the funds or mind to give a growing boy a nutritious lunch. these packed lunches always with the crust off because that's the way theo liked it. melissa always remembered.

theo had three favorite places: scott's bedroom, the corner next to his bed where theo's blow up mattress was. the bridge in which tara and he crossed everyday on their way back to raekens from school. his final place was actually beacon hills elementary.

theo always liked school. theo was good at school. he didn't realize this until mellisa had pointed out an exceptional report card. he didn't think it was much of anything to be proud of.

he liked recognizing big words from english class and novels that would help him when his mom watched jeopardy. she would watch the show every night. sitting in a daze in the raekens dark living room. not paying much mine to the eight year old, until he started blurting out the answers to her favorite show. she beamed at him. he loved his mother's smile, she had the same dimples as tara.

so yeah, when a seventeen year old theo raeken spent months filing the names of anyone ever involved in the mccall pack, current members, deceased and ones that just fell out of beacon hills. he remebered some names.

theo raeken grew up in beacon hills, and beacon hill wasn't to big of a town.

theo rembered issac lahey a quiet boy who had been in his thrid grade class, jackson whittemore who was a grade older than them and everyone knew him because he was was offered a spot on the middle school lacross team, he knew erica reyes who he rembered for her epilepsy and it made him hate himself a little less for being the king of the heart condition, he even remebered names like derek hale- who was in the same grade as tara. theo even rembered the name malia tate as she was small girl who did go to beacon hills elementary, who was always startled and always walked a bit faster than everyone else through the halls. or even lydia martin, a girl stiles had a crush on. she talked to theo a lot, lydia used to call him teddy, he didn't know when it started but he let her do it purely to spite the fact that lydia gave theo a nickname and never bothered to acknowledge stiles.

theo rembered all of them, i mean for years of his life all he had to rely on was his memory to make sure it was real.

though during the line memories turned bitter and he was left with the sour taste of resentment.

so it was weird to think despite it all, that year was one of theo's best. he never felt like he belonged. sure he had scott and stiles before but gaining friendship & being labeled as an "inseparable trio" by the sheriff station deputies, whenever they rang havoc through their office made theo's mouth crack a toothy grin. he felt like he had a family.

that was until the air started getting colder in beacon hills. theo started hearing the voices. though, even so much later in life he never could quite pin point how it started, like his brain couldn't truly decipher what was going on. some of it felt like dream, though the dreams and the thoughts. sometimes they didn't feel like his own and made him so scared he would leave the day feeling nauseous.

though this all came in spurts. his birthday was that november, and that was magical. he spent the weekend with stiles and scott, theo's mom actually made the point to bring the three of them bowling. the boys pitched in on buying theo a big millennium falcon lego set because he was always doing things with his hands, something he picked up not being so most athletic of the bunch. they also got him big poster of han solo just to spite him. he blushed and yelled at them for stupid gifts but they knew by the smile on his face he loved them.

he loved so much because despite the fact that they were poking fun at him ever so lightly, they were good natured and they held thought. they really thought about theo enough to know what he liked. he never had that before.

so the voices started getting louder again around christmas time. it was weird for theo, the happiest time of the year filled him with such excessive dread. it didn't feel right. theo's life changed that month.

then one day scott and stiles get sit down because something tragic happened. tara raeken is dead. the details are fuzzy and they don't really understand how, seeing as these boys are just in fourth grade. they are horrified, it's one of the only other times they've experienced death besides with stiles mom. though claudia stilinksi was sick, sometimes sick people die. learning about tara left a bad taste in their mouth. she was young.

they try and call, bike past is his house. they don't hear from him. they go to her funeral, scott and stiles, high on anxiety attached to their parents just trying to sneak a peak of where their best friends may be. he's gone, that's the conclusion they come to, he's gone. they don't know how it could have happened, they just know that he isn't there. why wouldn't he be there?

they try and talk to the raekens but haunted by their daughters death, they paid less attention to theo than before. they barley give them a straight answer, melissa explains what grief can do to a family and not to blame them but is equally suspicious.

just take a minute to think, while scott and stiles are scared and searching for their best friend, theo raeken, barley nine years old is given a heart transplant. alone in a dark and cold sewer hidden deep under beacon hills, horrified and a failure, that's what the dread doctors tell him. a boy who keeps quiet, does what needs to be done and has to survive. doing absolutely everything he can to be kept around, the second he heals (which theo recognizes is abnormally fast) the doctors are straight out of beacon hills.

the doctors eventually find his parents too, who leave beacon hills, he doesn't exactly know what happened to them. he doesn't everything he can not to think about the possibilities. he hopes he has a chance, survival instincts flourish but the ideal of living isn't quite the same as surviving.

one day, the doctors inform him he has absolutely nothing to go back to, he figured this he just be didn't think they would actually tell him. they never told him much.

they are far away from beacon hills- much farther than he assumed. he has no sister, and his parents are gone.

he is alone, and he is finding out that now, he has one more secret to hide. the poor boy has claw and fangs and often thinks about using them to rip himself apart, i mean he deserves it right? he just watched his sister die, to go down with the last living part of her, his own heart.

while theo is expecting his fate, stiles and scott and stuck in months of confusion. missing posters of the boys face are strung up everywhere they can reach, once his parents are gone. they know they need to do everything they can.

mellisa feels like she's been punched in the gut, so she helps her boys. she calls every hospital in the county, and then she starts reaching out to some of the bigger hospitals in the state. spreading word of a missing nine year old like wildfire. she spends nights after her shift arguing with noah stilinksi, he has been looking to. he tries to bargain logic with her.

"yeah it's strange he never said goodbye, he wasnt at the funeral- it's weird, yes, but his parents left too. their daughter just died melissa. maybe they didn't want to stay."

melissa knows, yeah that makes sense. theo had to of just moved with the raekens but something about it doesn't feel like it makes sense.

he would have said goodbye to her. she knows it.

other people in beacon hills were actually thinking the same thing, something wasn’t quite making sense.

those other people being some who can sense unrest in supernatural frequencies. a family who makes it their business to monitor the supernatural. the hales.

though, talia hales supernatural concerns didn't often revolve around fourteen year old girls who drown, shes curious. the girl, was in dereks grade. the mother in her falters but it doesn't get strange until the police reports reveal the fact that the girls heart was gone, she was found. gaping chest wound, lying in the river.

so she starts to suspect somethings wrong. she's seen the raekens case, something about it doesn't make sense. sure, the death of a teenage girl is overwhelmingly tragic but there isn't much to investigate. though talk of the raekens is getting loud, she comes to find out this is because of the raekens youngest, who was nowhere to be seen days before the funeral.

she knows the hunters are back in beacon hills. so wonders if the two correlate. so she starts asking questions.

talia, with her daughter in tow see two boys standing outside the sheriffs station, stopping people when they walk in to show they a poster. it's theo raekens missing poster, though there isn't much official about it. it seems like the sheriffs department couldn't issue anything official, so as she walks up to the boys seemed to have made dozens of copies themselves. there information seems formal enough.

she catches their anxiety heighten as talia hands the poster over to laura who stands behind her.

the taller one raises a brow, "have you seen him anywhere miss?"

she smiles, "miss hale- you can call me talia though. this is my daughter laura. we haven't seen your friend but we'd like to help..."

the taller boy nods, "well, i'm scott. that's stiles. how could you help?"

talia hale lies easily, "i've heard about what happened to the raekens and it sparked my concern. i have a friend, local sheriffs station who is awfully good with the police dogs. if you have anything that your friend owned i might be able to call i'm a favor."

a few days later, stiles had found her in the same spot as last time with a small black sweater. she smiled and told him she would do her best to help these two boys. not sure if her intrest in the case was supernatural based or because she didn't want these boys, who smelled like anxiety and exhaustion to fall down the hole of loss themselves. she wasn't sure where investigating theo’s disappearance themselves would leave them, she didn't want them getting caught up in the supernatural spiderweb of beacon hills.

though, talia hale looses scent and momentum on the case. literally and metaphorically. she finds herself near some suspicious tunnels, leading right under beacon hills but scent falls short. she's frustrated, and the time since his disappearance is lengthening but her families needs become increasingly concerning.

she's listens, she likes to know what's going on. so when she hears her sixteen year old whispering a bit more with her kid brother she raises suspicion. she doesn't trust peter like she used to, not after getting involved with the desert wolf.

paige dies months after that, dereks heartbroken and talia is trying to put together pieces of a story that turned her babies eyes blue. to young. beacon hills doesn't quite understand how another student is dead, with no previous medical history. this, the death of paige she knows is supernatural.

kate argent moves to town and in months, the hale house is burned to the ground. inside, theo raekens black sweater. tucked away in a room, where news clippings and missing posters caught fire the fastest.

so with no surprise, another tragedy is unleashed and it's the talk of the town. memory of theo starts to fade, like most things do in beacon hills. it's not anybodies fault but it still stings. though, theo million miles away hasn't felt much of anything latley.

it's been a little over a year. he hasn't cried in the past three months. he won't let himself. nobody is going to find him. he isn't going to het out. so he puts up his walls, as many as he can. he just has to stay alive a little bit longer. make something worth taras sacrifice. they had started to kill off more of the chimeras, more of their science experiments. he can't get killed, he can't do that to tara.

theo was always a fast learner. theo always liked school. theo was good at school. this wasnt exactly the same as math class at beacon hills elementary but he was picking up skills quickly. theo didn't quite recognize himself after that year. he wasn't that same boy, and that had to suite him just fine. he never had much of a choice in this. he just chose to try and keep her heart beating for as long as he could.

so theo raeken adjusted, he had to.

[inosukeslefttoe]

SO i just finished wonder egg priority and i think that with confidence i can say it has been one of my favorite animes like... ever ?? and not even from hyperfixation or obsession over it just... its so fucking real yet so simple in a way that i havent rlly seen shown in any other shows you feel ??

but first i wanna talk about how sexy the art and animation is real quick... HOMIE ITS SO GOOD LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT JUST... serotonin... the characters are all so unique and iconic and fun but not over the top in their designs yknow ??? they seem like regular every day girls but they stand out and theyre all sO CUTE !!!! also i love how the style is like this soft bubbly slice of life lookin stuff with bright happy colors and the most beautiful scenes you could find but they also have the SICKEST fight scenes complete with whimsical animal helpers and terrifying villains and crazy weapons unique to each character. and the animation. god DAMN shawty i am obsessed with everything in this show. i might make a post solely about the art later lol bc i wanna get into the other stuff.

so the themes in the show right ?? it starts just as this cute lil magical girl kinda deal but within the first episode we see that like.. oh damn... thats kinda heavy... tbh i was a little shocked and thought about stopping bc yknow bad mental health BUT i was so intrigued that i had to keep going and i am SO GLAD that i did. because this show just so beautifully discusses all these heavy topics in such an eloquent and artistically expressive way. and also like, , the juxtaposition of the charming childlike vibe with bright colors and 14 yr old girl protagonists against the dark themes of suicide and so much else,, i think is just perfect. bc a lot of heavy animes are more of the seinen genre and have some middle aged dude as a protag or make the entire color palette dim or offer little relief to the pain of these heavy themes right ?? but NO not wonder egg bitches B) because these problems arent just things that ppl face later in life or just problems that need to be talked about among adults or the edgy seinen watching squad,, these are REAL problems that face people of every age, gender etc and i think its awesome that wonder egg addresses that. some may cringe at the thought of their high schooler watching animes that discuss sexual harassment, suicide, abuse, self harm, eating disorders etc,, but in reality it is the most comforting thing i have ever come across and is basically jsut free anime therapy. because not only does wonder egg present these themes to the viewers as something real that happens to all kinds of people (making said people feel heard in a way that maybe they hadnt before), but it also makes sure to vanquish all of these forms of trauma. and the way the trauma is vanquished isnt always beautiful and it isnt always just magically gone with a poof. the struggles of overcoming or living with that sort of thing are shown in such a real and relatable way that addresses every hardship trauma survivors have to go through. and i just. god i cry bro. 

oh m y GOD and the lgbtq+ rep in this show ?? like shawty... as soon as i saw episode one i was picking up on some gay/lesbian themes but then again im sapphic and project that a lot so i tend to see that sort of stuff like... everywhere... but NE WAYS... episode ten made me FUKCING CRY BRO LIke i cant believe there was a whole trans character with a whole trans pride hoodie like LKGHKDGH my heart is just so.. so fucking full thinking about him. bc like yeah i know there are trans characters in anime but i feel like theyre always very ambiguous about actually being trans or not or erased or portrayed as a harmful stereotype or theyre constantly misgendered and still refered to as their assigned gender at birth and i hate it. HOWEVEr... Kaoru.. *chefs kiss* it was so amazing to see a character straight up say “yeah im trans” in such a casual yet powerful way bc i personally have never seen that before. and i love love loved how he went into his backstory and talked to momoe about gender bc i think thats what she rlly needed and that it helped her find herself and it makes me so happy oh my god,, and the way they talked about it never seemed forced or like it was the focal point of his existence yknow ?? like yeah he existed to help momoe overcome some of her trauma but he also just existed to be HIM yknow ?? also... personally, i headcanon momoe as a trans girl even though i dont remember it being explicitly stated plus the school scenes of her and stuff would seem like they suggest otherwise ??but,,, SHAWTY THE AMOUNT OF SUBTEXT and her complicated relationship w gender is... something i feel like a cis girl would not go through so harshly yknow ?? with all of the questioning and feeling detached from femininity or feeling like ppl dont see her as an actual girl and only like her as a guy or for her masculine traits,,, but dont take my word on this bc i myself am a cis girl but that was just my take on it as someone in the lgbtq+ community trying to educate myself on the transgender community :) either way,, wonder eggs portrayal of momoe and kaoru and the way that momoe becomes so passionate about expressing herself the way she wants to as a girl is just... good lord im gonna cry its so perfect,,,.so ... i just love this show way too much. i also am honestly super lost about the relationship btwn acca and ura-acca ?? bc i was gonna mention ura-acca as a canonically gay guy bc when i was watching i interpreted ep 11 as him being in love with acca and being jealous of Azusa (bc i mean,, they lived together (i swear to god there was only one bed in that apartment) and had a daughter together and def loved each other and also when Frill said they were husbands and then when ura-acca said he wasnt attracted to azusa but he was def jealous of their relationship ??) but then i saw somewhere that theyre brothers ?? which would make sense ig since they look kinda similar and accas daughter called ura-acca “uncle”.. but at the same time its ANIME SO THEY ALL LOOK SIMILAR and referring to gay couples as siblings is an EXTREMELY common euphemism soooo... IM JUST LOST HERE... but yeah i tried doing research and found different things so i cant say anything for sure >:( however,,, if they are canonically a lil fruity for each other... when frill refered to acca as ura-accas husband i imploded dude you never hear that sort of wording in anime.. but if theyre related i am so sorry. 

god this is so much longer than i planned it to be oops but i also love the theme about like.. relying on friends to help carry your weight but at the same time not becoming completely dependent on those friends and using their support to learn how to love yourself and rely on yourself yknow ?? bc that is exactly what healthy friendships look like. bc i think ai sort of had a codependency thing goin on with koito maybe ?? but now she has a whole squad of funky friends that are so so different but all struggle with different kinds of trauma and although they fight over it, they always get through it with each other together. and they push each other no matter what to be the best versions of themselves and they teach other that getting hurt is okay because theyre always gonna be there to pick up the pieces no matter what happens. they can give each other space when they need and adapt to meet each others needs but theyre always able to balance it out with their own needs and thats such a beautiful thing in friendships especially at their age like damn i wish i had that maturity when i was 14 but no all i had was depression. another thing is that through these friendships you get to see all the different sides of each girl; you get to see them being strong or a shining light to their friends when theyre hurting but you also get to see them being hurt and weak and allowing themselves to be on the receiving end of the comfort. their friendships allows them to have weaknesses but it also allows them to highlight their strengths and thrive off of each others. I LOVE FRIENDSHIP DUDE

next i wanna briefly mention some of the themes connected to suicide that ive noticed. a big one is the survivors guilt that ai feels once koito is dead. several times she screams that she wishes she couldve gone with koito and she dreams of a “perfect world” where they committed a double suicide. one of the main reasons for her troubles is that she blames herself for koitos death and feels like it should be her thats dead... but at the same time she feels like too much of a coward to do anything now that koito is gone. she just has all these complex and contradicting feelings that wear away at her in ways that ppl that havent gone through the suicide of a loved one could never imagine. a lot of the times when things like this are portrayed in media i feel like its more in a way thats meant to guilt trip those that have taken their own lives and paint suicide as this selfish sin thats unforgivable but... not only does wonder egg reject that idea and instead portray it as a heartbreaking tragedy with,,, so so many terrible reasons, but it focuses on the feelings of ai separate from koito without blaming her in any way. not once did i feel like the show antagonized koito or that ai blamed koito for doing any of this, but they simply mourned her loss and touched on ais reaction towards the event but separate from koito herself if that makes sense. and i think that discussing survivors guilt without painting koito as the bad guy is something so beautifully done in wonder egg that can really resonate with those that have lost a loved one to suicide and have struggled with these same things.

okay i think this is the last thing ill mention,,, but HOMIE THE PARALLEL UNIVERSE BIT AT THE END. I AM. OBSESSED. i am such a whore for anything about the multiverse okay n e ways...,, not only did this make a super epic trippy ending of season one and add a little bit more magical girl whimsy to the show,, but it had such a powerful message. from the perspective of og ai,, finding out that you killed yourself in another world is... i mean its definitely not a surprise but at the same time it rlly makes you think how close og ai herself couldve been to that point and what decisions led her out of that dark place in her life. if i were in her shoes i would be terrified and id cry bc the thought of going back to such a dark place and actually going through with something like that is my worst fear and probably something that ai fears too. but at the same time,,, think from the perspective of ai two !!! like yeah its true that theres this awful terrible version of ai that dies but theres also a whole version of ai that is a superhero magical girl fighting off monsters to save countless ppls lives !! and she has a badass lizard and a gang of awesome friends !!! at first i was worried that ai two would be jealous of og ai and compare herself to her and feel inferior but like.. THEYRE LITERALLY THE SAME PERSON AND CAPABLE OF THE SAME THINGS !!! and ai two realized that !! just within the span of one episode, she went from the version of ai who took her life,, to the version of ai jumping in front of a friend to take a bullet for them and save their life. and that just inspired THE SHIT OUT OF ME. i think that ai was sent another version of herself to sort of beat her own worst enemy yknow ?? those doubts and fears that shes no good or that shes that same bystander from episode one and that she hasnt changed at all. but getting to interact with her parallel self and see her grow was just what she needed to realize that while yeah sometimes the worst thing can happen and things can be terrible but on the other hand sometimes the most wonderful thing imaginable can happen because she has the power to do either. 

so im gonna go ahead and stop rambling bc i got all my thoughts out that i wanted to for this post :D but yeah lol i might make another if i feel like it sometime. long story short: this show is perfect and it is going on my favorite of all times.

[static-head]

it's that time again where I talk about an idea I had

so I don't have a name for this one but it's a time travel AU with an overpowered Izuku

The story starts at the end, Izuku won the fight against All For One who revealed to be his father and now they both lay on the ground, the villain slowly dying and the hero exhausted

Izuku should be happy, he won, he beat the greatest villain, he had done his duty, but this victory was bittersweet as he thought of the sacrifices of hia friends and teachers, they were all dead, no one was left for him to celebrate

"I'm quite proud of you son" said AFO, Izuku cringed hearing those words coming from him

"don't call me that" he answered back, he didn't want to get called son by the worst man on the world

Now that he was dying, AFO let something thet he had ignored resurface, feelings, feelings for his family, his son

He felt bad, he had taken everything his son held dear that had been part of the plan at the begging but now, in a horribly ironic way, his son was more similar to him, alone ha ing lost everyone he ever held dear

one thought came into his head as he kept thinking about his son 'how many birthdays did I miss?' he owed his son something, anything really, maybe a sorry? no that isn't enough... maybe... yes that would work well

"do you wish to see your friends again?" AFO suddenly said surprising Izuku

"Can't you die a little more quietly?" he asked back, guess his father didn't live this long for no reason

"please, in my last minutes, humor your father, do you want to see your friends again?" AFO tried again, this time Izuku took a few seconds to answer and that brought a smile to his face, a black and red tendril already forming from his fingers

"of course I would, I would do anything to see them again, to try and save them or to at least have more time with them" tears came back to Izukus eyes, he closed them as he remembered their time together, he wished he could go back to the old times when they weren't child soldiers but just students

"well, it may be a late gift but I think you deserve it" these words confused Izuku, what was he talking about? had he finally gone insane? he opened his eyes to see the moment a black and red tendril stabbed him in the chest going straight into his heart, blood filled his mouth as he saw electricity run through the tendril into him, this was it for him, he had lowered his guard and now he was paying for it

When the electricity reached him, he felt a wave of pain go through his entire body ripping him to shreds, he felt his body go numb and in a strange way be unmade almost like Shigaraki's decay

as his own mind started to slip, the world around him started to blur and change and the last thing he heard was AFO, his father say

"Happy late birthday son"

Izuku slowly came back to his senses with the feeling of a dull pain on his body, the ground beneath him cold and wet but what caught his attention was the familiar voices around him

"-happy to see you again little brother, Isn't this the best? All the family is here"

"Back off you old bastard!"

"WHY WON'T YOU DIE!?"

"Now that's no way to treat a guest Nana, even less in front of the host"

"Uhm guys, the little guy is waking up"

Izuku slowly opened his eyes to see that he wasn't in the middle of the battlefield that was a destroyed city, instead he found himself in a dark alley surrounded by very familiar ghostly figures

He quickly recognized, Nana, first, Daigoro and the other users and someone with curly white hair hugging first as if they were... family...

"Why is he here?" Izuku asked suprising everyone including himself because of how high pitched his voice sounded, he lookes at himself to see thag he wasnte wearing his hero costume anymore, instead he was wearin his old middle school uniform and he wasn't a young adult, he was the small teenage boy from before UA

That's right, AFO decides to do one good thing which is sending Izuku into the past so he could spend time with his friends but the twist is, he send him back with One For All and All For One and all of it's stolen quirks

Izuku must now try to live his life again with the other AFO users and the spirit of his dead father while hiding the fact that he is from the future and that he is now the strongest person on earth

Izuku might do a little of vigilantism, taking care of a few villains that would be a pain in the ass later on, maybe putting a few villains in the right path and adopting all of his class

AFO is just happy to be able to pass time with his brother and son again

Nana is trying to find a away to kill ghost AFO

[kaz11283]

Chapter 5

Characters: Clint, you, Loki

Warnings: this is a SLOW burn, slight angst, fluff at the end, Loki starting shit.

Summary: life has never really bwen this complicated. Or well the life that you think you know has never really been this complicated. Living with the avengers, learning new things, yeah its gonna be a long road but what else do you have to look forward to other than the random runins with the god of mischief.

Loki Masterlist

~~~~~

It had been about a week since you had arrived at the tower and just as long as your incounter with Loki, you hadnt had much time to think about it though since you were normally nose deep in class work or training with Nat and Clint since Tony had sent you the message "If your gonna be an avenger you have to train like one, training starts at 6." You had left him on read after that, you had never been a morning person and you sure as hell wasnt about to start now.

"Alright y/n, lets try you on the bow today." Clint smiled walking into the arena where most of your training took place.

"After I finish this." You said pointing to your coffee. "I swear, you would think that after saving lives you would want to sleep in." You grumbled.

"Bad guys dont sleep, we dont get to sleep." Clint said wiping down a few of his practice arrows.

"You didnt get back till like 3 this morning. Im really starting to wonder if you sleep at all." You tossed your cup away and got up starting to do your stretches.

"Get over here so I can show you how to hold this thing." He saod holding out the bow.

"I know how to use a bow, I was in archery in high school. Top of my team." You grabbed the bow feeling the cool metal in your hand. His bow was diffrent than what you was use to, as light as air almost were yours had been heavy.

"This bow is probably a little different than what your use to. The metal is vibranium, the strings are made of some type of industrial woven string that Tony invinted in his lab. Might be a littlw hard for you to pull back." He smiled looking at the bow like a child.

"It is very beautiful." You examined it looking down the sights has you pulled the string back easily. "Absolutly magnificent peice of weaponry." You looked over at him and seen that he was staring at you wide eyed. "What?"

"No one else has ever been able to draw the string back like that." You let the string gently go back into place amd handed it back to him.

"I told you, I was in archery while I was in high school."

"Theres no way that someone no matter how skilled they are can pull that back."

"Well if your forgetting, apperantly Im not from here either."

"Yup almost forgot, Asguardian. Anyways. You know how to use one of these so lets set up a few targets and get to work. Tony wants to try you out on a few different things, eval you, and see what suits you best. Im already leaning toward you being good at the bow."

After he talked you through some of the basics that you had informed him you knew and he insisted on stating that it was 'mandatory' you were finally able to pick up one of the training bows.

"These bows suck. Stark has all the money in the world and he buys walmart brand bows? If you pull this one back to many times the string will break. Why cant I just use yours?" You roll your eyes looking back at Clint.

"My bow, my baby. If you want ine bad enough you can start off at the bottom and work your way up. You have a card why dont you buy one?" He countered, just then the foor opened drawing your attention.

"Sorry, didnt realize that the area was occupied today, I just wanted to get a few throws in woth the new daggers Stark and Banner decided to enhance for me. Wanted to make sure that they wouldnt bloe up in my face." Loki said walking over to the bay next to you and Clint. You hadnt had a moment alone with the trickster since in the hall weeks ago and now he was here acting as of nothingbhad happened. You looked down at the daggers that he had laid out.

"Wow, those are beautiful." You noticed that not only had he laid down two simple green handeled knives but he had also laid down a set of electric blue ones and a set of gold handle ones engraved with ancient symbols and roses with the stems winding down the hilt. "May I?" You asked leaning down to get a closer look.

"Of course y/n, you are the one that gave me those." He answered casually. Your breathing hitched and you turned to look at him.

"Thats not funny Loki."

"I dont know what your talking about. I was simpl-" he started before you cut him off.

"You know damn good and well what I am talking about. What did you expect? Me to pick it up and everything come barreling back to me? Here I'll do you one even better." You stormed up to the daggers and grabbed one of the gold ones up throwing it at the target on the far side of the room. You had expected it to fall short and clink to the floor but you never hears it fall. When you looked at the target you noticed you had hit the middle.

Clints jaw had dropped as he was looking around the wall to see what you had been yelling about. Loki looked at you with a smug expression. "I assume they must have had knife throwing classes at the school you attended as well."

"Shut up. Clint are we done, I have some studying for class that I really need to do." You looked at clint as he knodded still awestruck. "Thanks, I'll talk with Tony about getting a better bow for me to practice with." You took off toward your room.

Later after you had taken a hot shower and changed into some leggings and a baggy shirt you decided to go to the one place in the tower that you had decided to claim as your own little study corner. It was located on of of the high up floors that happened to be more of an observation deck, you could watch the team leave on missions, see the ocean, and watch some of the most beautiful sun sets that you had seen. You had notice while checking the place out that there was a fairly large window seat that you could spead your work out on as you looked out over the city, this small part of the tower was your little hid away, you hadnt seen any other member of the team up here so you figured when you needed the alone time you could come here. It had seemed to work for the most part until today.

You notice the shadow of the figure standing over you before looking up into the eyes of Lokis confused ones, you had noticed his lips moving before rolling your eyes and taking out your noise canceling ear pods.

"What do you want Loki?" You sighed placing them back into the chsrging dock.

"Well if you hadnt had those things in you would have heard me tell you that I was sorry for earlier." He sassed crossing his arms.

"How did you find me? No one really bothers coming up here." You pulled your legs under your chin and covering you feet with the throw that you had brought up with you this time.

"The AI system has no bounderies when it comes to privacy, it can tell you were anyone is in this god forsaken place." He responded. "May I sit?"

"And if I say no?"

"I'll sit anyways." He shrugged.

"Then what is the point in asking?" You leaned forward moving your papers and books out of the way. He reached down and grabbed a few of the papers to help you.

"Your doing a paper on Shakespeare?" He asked as he sat down reading over the page.

"Umm, yeah. Part of my agreement to come here is so that I can finish up my collage classes. Drama and Art Major." He hamded the paper back to you so that you could stick it in your binder. He gave you a look that you were use to getting from him. "Don't say it Loki." You out your hand up to stop him before he could even open his mouth.

"I wasn't going to say anything." He held his hands up.

"Hum, interesting. The god of lies actually sucks at lying. I should remember that." You smiled. This was the first time you had actually felt half way confortable around him.

"I could never lie to you." He smiled back. "You have always had a knack for seeing right through me."

"I wish you wouldnt do that." You sighed leaning your heas agints the window behind you.

"Do what exactly?" He askes mirroring your position.

"Where you mention something about my past. Its annoying and it breaks my heart."

"Well Dove, how do you think I feel? The worst part about it for me is that while you remember nothing I am stuck remembering everything. Your past, my past, our past together. It truly is the worst pain that I have ever felt. To have something that you have wanted for so long in front of you and they dont even want you back." He sighed looking out the window.

"Loki," you crossed your legs and placed your elbows on your knees. "I have never said that I didnt want you. I just dont know what is what."

"So you do want me?" He laughted.

"That is not what I meant and you know it." You leanded back again. "Tell me about us. About how you and Thor know me." He eyes lite up.

Chapter 6

Tag list:

@high-functioning-lokipath

@serpentargo

@drbaureid

@poetic-fiasco

@kgirardin

@sophlubbwriting

@supbeeches

@rosaline-black

@jesuswasnotawhiteman

@natandersonnla

@delightfulheartdream

[rint4rous]

hogwarts au! oikawa

a/n: wrote this with a bad headache LMAO so if you see mistakes no you didnt <3

yeah help

anyway

oikawa toru

sixth year slytherin

captain of slytherin quidditch team

this one. very popular with the girls.

always gets gifts and confessed to, he turns them all down nicely tho

he flirts with them a little but never goes out with anyone

thanks but no thanks, hes focusing on quidditch

mostly hangs out with hanamaki, matsukawa, and iwaizumi

you, sixth year gryffindor

a chaser for the quidditch team

actually you and oikawa had a bit of a rivalry thing going on

because oikawa was getting good grades AND is good at quidditch

and it doesnt even look like hes trying.

and he lowkey comes off as arrogant sometimes

and youre like i hate geniuses

the two of you met during first year when he tried playfully hitting iwa in the hallway but iwa dodged

and you happen to be speedwalking past and then next thing you know you get slapped???

you stop walking and turn to oikawa

hes like HOLY CRAPDFHJSHJR

“I AM SO SORRY-”

“it’s alright!”

“are you sure??”

“yeah, it was an accident, right? …. unless it wasnt?”

“NO I SWEAR IT WAS AN ACCIDENT”

“i thought so! see you ‘round!”

then you skip away

yeah. yall dont really start competing and shit until you found out your mom and his mom had BEEF??? WHEN THEY WERE IN SCHOOL????

you found that out at the end of first year

“i heard tachibana’s son is in your year. or i guess she’s oikawa now.”

youre like yeah what about it

“my dearest y/n, you’re a smart little girl, okay?”

“so make sure you’re better than that oikawa kid, alright?”

and little innocent you is like “ok”

so start of second year, you study and work extra hard

but here’s perfect little oikawa who always knocks you down to second place

at first youre like. i’ll just work harder!

and he joins quidditch and so do you

so you try hard at that too

you’re not like a sore loser or anything so when slytherin wins you shake his hand with a smile

but by the end of the year you’re just kinda :/ now because you never see him studying or practicing spells so how the fuck is he BETTER THAN YOU AT EVERYTHING!!! ITS NOT FAIR!!!!!

third year you come into school with like not very good feelings abt oikawa

and your mom was on your ass about your grades and you’re like omfggg im TRYING OKAY IM TRYING SO HARD

too bad tho thats when he starts liking you …

middle of third year is when you start expressing those feelings for oikawa out loud

“i hate self-centered geniuses. come back down to earth, will you.”

he heard you say when test results came back

and hes like is she talking abt me? lol nah shes probably talking about stupid ushijima over there

and then he finds out you were in fact talking abt him

hes kinda hurt lol

then when the new term rolls in

and the two of you just start talking shit about each other and start arguing all the time

“what’s the answer, l/n?”

“fairy wings.”

“oh my bad, i didn’t realize she said oikawa, and not l/n.”

“oh sorry, i thought you wouldn’t know the answer so i answered for you! i saved you from embarrassing yourself. you’re welcome~”

your seatmate yaku was holding you down with all his might and HOW IS LITTLE MAN ABLE TO HOLD YOU BACK HIS GRIP IS STRONG BRO

the whole class s ighs here we go AGAIN

the teacher doesnt even bother sending you guys out to hall anymore because this happens so much

you always try to sabotage each other in potions

one time his eyebrows almost burned off after his potion exploded in his face

makki and mattsun like LMFAOWFEHERGUYER

then when the year ends you’re like ranting to your mom like “i hate geniuses. who does he think he is? just because he can beat me at everything?? i’ll show him. i’ll make him eat dirt in the field. i’ll wipe that dumb smirk off his face. i’ll-”

your mom: omg my little baby so full of hate just like her momma

fourth year you’re so determined to beat oikawa at something

he sees you in the library, unprovoked, once and he comes up from behind you like

“aw, is l/n gonna try beating me again this year? you know there’s no point in trying.”

you: hold it in hold it in hold it in YOU’RE MATURE NOW Y/N L/N. YOU SHOULD BE MORE MATURE THAN THIS DIMWIT IN FRONT OF YOU. inhale exhale inhale exhale

“aw, is oikawa gonna try beating ushiwaka in quidditch again this year? you know there’s no point in trying.”

way to be mature

poor oikawa tho you pressed a wrong button so he just leaves silently

you kinda regret it after

so this year goes like the last and so does the next

“arent you tired?? of competing with oikawa all the time??” your friend semi asked you

“kind of”

“then stop?? you dont have to fulfill your mom’s high school revenge lmao”

“ughh eita i know but im too far in”

one time you were out breaking curfew #savage

no but seriously you couldn’t sleep so you thought some fresh air will help, the dorms were super suffocating right now

you were stressed after your mom’s monthly letter

beat oikawa this beat oikawa that

you turn at a corner and you see the man himself, ALSO BREAKING CURFEW

now the both of you are looking at each other like 👁👄👁

“GOD L/N I THOUGHT YOU WERE A TEACHER I NEARLY DIED FROM A HEART ATTACK”

“shush before we both get caught”

“right sorry sorry”

“so what the hell are you doing breaking curfew.”

“what are you doing breaking curfew.”

“i asked you first”

“so?”

“just answer the question, oikawa.”

he looks around, making sure the coast was clear before he motions you over to him and as you walk towards him

you see the door hes standing in front of

he drags you in there and what you see is

a bunch of practice dummies

“yeah i,, practice my spells here at night. contrary to popular belief i’m not a genius like ushiwaka or tobio. i’m flattered you think so, though.”

and youre like he... actually practices?? he is actually human?

“what’s with that look? you wanna join me practice at night?”

“as if-” and then you see the book of spells and you guys aren’t even learning any of this YET. and you are determined not to fall behind oikawa “sure.”

oikawas like pardon?

you: i SAID SURE.

and so now at night you practice spells together

only because you want to beat him as if

the arguing goes down a little because you get caught up in beating each other at who gets to do the spell right first that practice runs super late sometimes and you dont have energy to fight with each other that early

everybodys like ??? huh????

but then you’re back to the usual bs in the afternoon and everybodys like oh okay so the world isnt ending yet

so anyway !! yall are practicing again

you’re pointing your wand at a practice dummy and trying to focus so you dont accidentally do something dumb

"hey why do you hate me so much?”

LITERALLY CATCHES YOU OFF GUARD AND BREAKS YOUR FOCUS

“it’s not because i hit you when we were first years right? it really was an accident i swear-”

“you still remember that?”

“well yeah… because i cant think of any other reason why you don’t like me.”

“um… trying too hard to please my mom, i guess. what about you? why did you try so hard to beat me at everything?” you ask, regaining your focus for the charm

“idk, you never paid attention to me unless i did.”

you scoff, “why? you don’t like me or anything, do you?”

“i do tho??”

he literally said that just before you chanted the spell and you got caught off guard and

“stupefy!”

it almost hits oikawa

oikawa: WHAT DID I DO

you: SHITHEAD DONT SAY THAT WHEN IM ABOUT TO DO SOMETHFIBEFH

“HOW DID THIS EVEN HAPPEN???”

“I DONT KNOW IT WAS FUN COMPETING WITH YOU WHEN WE WERE SECOND YEARS AND IT JUST DID?? I TRIED SO HARD SO I CAN IMPRESS YOU AND I GUESS MY PLAN BACKFIRED BECAUSE I DONT THINK YOU LIKE ME VERY MUCH”

now youre staring at each other and you’re both red

he kinda quiets down “and you’re a better rival than ushijima anyway. i don’t mean any of the stuff i said, i swear. i know you don’t like me but i just needed to let that out or i will go insane.”

and hes just looking down all shy

at this point you actually dont know if you like oikawa or not

i mean??? you spent like 3 years butting heads with this dude

and he liked you the whole time?? hes crazy this man is crazy.

maybe you were just in denial the whole time

because?? you could’ve stopped competing with him at everything

maybe you did enjoy it somehow

he did make your life at school interesting

“let’s go out on a few dates and we’ll see.”

his head just whips up and his eyes like light up and hes so EXCITED

in the time before you officially started dating

you find out from iwaizumi that even tho he smiles at a lot of girls its actually rarely genuine the only girl hes ever seen oikawa smile about genuinely was you

and that his mom actually didnt approve of him playing quidditch at first because he had a bad knee but he pushed for it because he really wanted to

he has like a smug and a flippant demeanor but hes very attentive and super caring !!

hes super passionate and hard working at what he does and

i guess now you finally realize you are falling

it takes five dates until the two of you officially start going out

if you tell third year you that you were dating oikawa she would never believe it but here you are, walking to class with him

when the two of you walked in the classroom talking

like TALKING NORMALLY AND NOT THE USUAL “i will choke you in your sleep” “ooh, kinda k-” “don’t”

it was already sus when the arguing toned down a bit but now that its like. REALLY GONE?? everybody is so confused

LMFAO matsukawa asks like “what happened?? are you guys broken?”

“no???”

“how rude! dearest y/n and i are dating now!”

everybody in this class: see now thats crazy. that is crazy.

makki: maybe we didnt hear him right. say that again oikawa

oikawa: me and y/n are dating.

everybody: oh okay bc we thought you said you and l/n were dat- WAIT SO YOU AND L/N REALLY ARE TOGETHER??? 

you: unfortunately

oikawa: h-hey :((((

everybody: SO WE DONT GOTTA LISTEN TO YALL ARGUE FIRST THING IN THE MORNING??? YOU HAVE TO TREAT THE WHOLE CLASS TO BUTTERBEER I THINK WE DESERVE IT AFTER THESE THREE YEARS OF CONSTANT YELLING

nobody was as SHOCKED as your moms

“y/n, baby, i know i did not just hear you say you’re dating the oikawa kid. repeat that for momma again.”

“i’m dating the oikawa kid.”

like?? MOM THIS WAS TECHNICALLY UR FAULT

“so toru, what did you wanna tell me?”

“i have a girlfriend now! her name is y/n l/n.”

“l/n? surely not THAT l/n’s daughter, right?”

“oh it is that l/n.”

when your families have dinner together for the first time

THE TENSION LMFAO

but they do try hard to get along. they try super hard.

they start getting along because MAN YOU AND OIKAWA WERE SOO CUTE AND THEY WANT YOU TO GET MARRIED AND THEY HAVE TO GET ALONG IF THEY WANT IT TO HAPPEN. THEIR GRANDKIDS ARE GONNA BE SO CUTE!!!

“ma, we haven’t graduated yet-”

your mom, ignoring you: THEYRE GOING TO HAVE THE CUTEST HAIR

oikawa’s mom: AND THEY’RE GOING TO BE SUPER SMART LIKE THEIR PARENTS!

your mom: AND WE’LL BE THE BEST GRANDMAS.

momma oiks: PERIOD!

steals your books from you in the halls so he can carry it for you

you tease each other with pet names and shit???

he’ll try to kiss your cheek in the hall but iwa grabs the back of his robe and pulls him away “you’re gross”

“you’re just jealous iwa!!”

when your houses arent playing each other, he goes to your games and vice versa!

tries to distract you in the field

“hey beautiful”

“toru don’t or i will make iwa knock you off your broom.”

“you're so mean”

so anyways yall r couple goals

"listen well, kindaichi, kunimi, your senior is showing you how to get girls.”

kunimi, without looking up from his book: what are you gonna teach us? accidentally slap the girl and get her to hate you for three years while you secretly pine over her during that time before confessing that you liked her the whole time and you go out on five dates and officially start dating? too much work

oikawa: LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT

[shhhlikeme]

“Losty Aone” / “Losty Mountain Man🏔” Series:

Outtake Collection #18.5:

———————————

A/N: I know y’all wanna know what happens here sooo I’ll meet you down at the end with more of my authors notes!

TABLE OF CONTENTS

———————————

EARLIER THAT NIGHT - 10:36 PM - ISSA MESS AT THE MOVIES - PART 2 😭🤡

“Hey. You sure you don’t want us to go with you? I can cancel with my parents and—“

You interrupted your friend, waving her off nonchalantly as you jumped out of the back her car. “No, no, Kusa. Thank you for driving me. You guys didn’t need to! But I really appreciate it. I need this time by myself to just…. You know…. Breathe.” 

Kusa frowned at you, still look unsure as to whether she should leave you alone at the theatre or not. Going to the movies alone is a little weird in her opinion, and she knows that you have still been so heartbroken from your breakup, so the fact that Aone had been asked out by one of the girls on the Date Teko cheer team that you considered a friend really hit you hard. 

Despite it all, she and Katana have agreed to let you deal with this the way you see fit, because forcing their desires on you wasn’t the right way to go, and the last time they tried that you cut them off for a week. They had to tread very carefully, as friends. 

“Okay, babe. Call us when you want to get picked up, Okay? We don’t mind.”

You nodded, wrapping your favourite jacket around you a bit more tightly. The sweater-jacket that actually belonged to the man you were in love with. “Thank you.” 

Shutting the door, you stepped back so that Kusa could drive away. 

Katana, who was sitting in the passengers seat, pressed the button to roll up her window and You gave them one last wave, ready to see them off, but just before you could Katana—quiet and deep in thought, pressed the same button to roll the window back down. The car didn’t budge.

“Y/N.” The pretty cheer captain said in a small voice, staring at her lap. You had to lean in to hear her.  

“Hm?”

Big brown eyes looked into yours as your bestie stared at you. It was silent for a moment and the intensity in the air was palpable. Finally, the brunette spoke. 

“I’m worried about you.” She finished, looking more serious than you’ve ever seen her. 

Earlier this Saturday night, you found yourself crying in the shower after you heard that an ex teammate of yours, Sutairu, is interested and has decided to pursue Aone. 

This girl was gorgeous, sweet, and has noticed your Mountain Man from day one, unlike you. There is not one bad thing you can say about her, and you were sure that eventually—especially with Futakuchi’s help—Aone would some day let his walls down for her. One day you would see the most perfect man in the world with another girl because you let him. 

And even though it’s what he deserves: a girl that is better than you, the thought alone shatters you every time it crosses your mind. 

Aone was on this girls instagram story,—a photo of him in another hoodie standing in front of the students he teaches with a caption saying: MCM🤫💋❄️

What did that mean? Could they be dating now? 

Enough was enough. After crying in your shower, You decided you needed a change in scenery, so you got dressed, only putting on concealer and keeping the natural state of your hair when it’s wet. You threw on a huge cardigan, a tank top and some jeans and told the girls what you had planned. Kusa wouldn’t take no for answer, so they insisted on dropping to you at the theatre to see this action-thriller you found on the website. 

So here you are, heart dragging behind you on the floor. You needed to be alone and you needed a change of scenery, that’s all you knew. So now hearing your besties and seeing the absolute fear for your well-being evident on their faces, made your stomach turn even more. Mainly because you couldn’t help them help you. No one can. So that’s why all you answered was, 

“I’m worried too.” Staring into the eyes of the two beautiful females you call your best friends. You then Added, “But I need this hour, okay?. I’ll see you guys later. I have my phone.” Without waiting for a response, you spun away from the car to walk into the large building downtown, straight to the bathroom so you could cry in the stalls prior to the movie.

After you spent a good 10 minutes using toilet paper to wipe under your eyes, then reapplying some conveniently packed concealer there in the mirror, you stuffed the Fenty Beauty case in your purse and walked out of the bathroom so that you can purchase your ticket at the self-serve automated machine. You had grabbed your ticket when it slid out the slot and were began walking to your designated theatre when you heard a familiar voice call out to you. 

“Hey! Y/N?”

Turning toward the voice, you looked over to see a group of 4 boys, all of which you’ve seen before, but in volleyball practice gear. While they were all staring over at you, naturally—your eyes settled on the one in the middle that you recognized the most. And the one who called your name. 

“Takeru,” You breathed, honestly relieved that it wasnt someone from school that you had to pretend you wanted to speak to. Takeru is someone you genuinely liked, that you actually got close to at the Volleyball/Cheer Camp last summer. 

“One sec!” He called, and you stood there waiting as Nakashima handed his card to his friends that were waiting at the ticket kiosk. One of them must have said something annoying to him, because Takeru blushed and told him to shut the fuck up. Feeling scrutinized by his friends, you wrapped your arms around your torso as he stealthily limbo-ed under the rope that divided the line from from the rest of the theatre. 

***

“Ouuu dudes, look. That’s Takanobu’s super hot girlfriend that you fell in love with last summer! This is your second chance bro, don’t fuck it up!” Takeru’s friend nudged him with his elbow and teased him from where he was standing in line. The other boys chuckled when he said that. 

Takeru went red—mostly because he knew it was true. “Shut the fuck up, I’m over her!” He defended himself. He resisted the urge to hit his friend for saying that out loud. Getting out the line because he couldn’t risk his dumb friends exposing his past crush like they almost did multiple times last summer, Nakashima escaped the line to approach you, finding himself jogging over, instead of walking. 

🤨

SLOW DOWN, Takeru told himself. ARE YOU REALLY THAT EXCITED TO SEE HER?

“Hi, Y/N!” The ex-high school volleyball player greeted you with a warm smile that neither of you had any idea was reserved for only you. “It’s been a while.” 

You forced a smile back, but you could see by the way that his own smile faltered that Takeru noticed your smile didn’t reach your eyes. “You okay?” He asked, concerned. 

Lying, you nodded, looking down at your boots and Nakashima resisted the urge to reach forward and tilt your head up. To touch your beautiful skin like he’s wanted to do since the first day you approached him for help, he really thought those emotions had fled… but being around you again made him realize that obvioulsy they hadn’t. 

She’s taken, idiot. The athlete reminded himself. 

“Is Takanobu here?” Nakashima thought to ask, distinctly remembering how much just mentioning his name would bring a big smile to your face back at camp, lighting it up in its entirety. 

So imagine Takeru shock, however, when you winced at the sound of his name instead of beamed. Still staring at your boots, you shook your head. “No, I’m here alone.” 

Alone?

Ask. He told himself. ASK!

“Um-ummm—“ is all he could stutter out.

S m o o t h, idiot. he chastised himself for being so lame. 

“Please, Takeru-san,” you lifted your head to look up at the man you considered to be a pretty good friend. “Don’t.” 

Even though his mind was buzzing with a million questions, Being the smart volleyball player he is, Takeru shut his mouth because the tears welling up in your eyes was enough of an answer than any. His heart sunk seeing you look so unbelievably broken. Without missing a beat, He switched gears. “—What movie are you seeing?” He asked instead. 

You grinned weakly but gratefully at his change in topic, a smile that actually did reach your eyes. “Uh, I don’t even know,” you chuckled pathetically. “I just picked any random movie, um, because, yeah.” 

She’s so cute, thought Nakashima. “Well it’s written on your ticket. Shall we see?” 

“Oh, uh, right.” Feeling dumb, you lifted the ticket in your hand and read the movie title aloud,

 “Jet Down 2.” 

A large amused smile graced Takeru’s face. “Really—that is probably the biggest ‘guy’ movie ever made,”

You nodded, not wanting to mention that hearing the title made you remember that your ex loved the original of this movie. Your nod introduced Takeru and yourself to an awkward silence. You weren’t about to tell him that you picked a movie that you’d be the least interested in so that you can cry in peace because the sounds of shit blowing up will drown out your sobs, no ma’am. If this was any other time, you would have been so happy to see and catch up with this boy. Asking a million questions and telling him how happy you were to see him. But unfortunately, all you could think about was the “MCM” Snapchat you saw earlier. You were devastated, and Takeru caught on to it.... seeing you about to shatter, yet again. He offered his help. 

“Want some company? Uh—“

You immediately shook your head. “No, Takeru-san! You came here with your friends. Enjoy that. Don’t mind me, I....“

Nakashima stared down at you like you were a work of art. When you stopped your pathetic babbling, he nodded slowly, recognizing the same expressions he’s seen his sister’s wear when they were on the verge of crying over a boy. Right before they yelled him to leave their room, leave them alone, and shut the door. The same rule probably applied here. Like an expert, Nakashima backed off. “Okay,” he continued nodding. “I guess I’ll go then. It was really nice seeing you.” He opened his arms and you leaned in for a chaste hug, immediately wishing the male arms around you belonged to a certain white haired volleyball player instead. 

Takeru, on the other hand, didn’t realize how much he missed the feel of you in his arms again. He didn’t want to let go. He wished that the feelings you had for Aone-san were for him. Stupid.

Uncharacteristically, Nakashima turned his head to whisper something in your ear before you let go. Before he never saw you again. “But, tonight, if you need a shoulder to cry on, I’m just one theatre over… Okay? I have a pretty comfortable shoulder, so just text me.” 

Holding back tears, you nodded, removing yourself to make your way to the bathroom again. 

***

Better late than never, you thought to yourself as you sadly sat in your seat in the theatre solo, unsure of how much time has even passed. You didn’t realize this stupid movie would be so packed, but you were thankful for assigned seating (since you specifically chose an aisle seat in case you needed to make another fast-cry escape). You just sat in your seat, curling into a ball and trying to hold it together the best you can.

You couldn’t.

Another 10-minutes later, you found yourself ugly crying in your three-quarter eaten popcorn, completely drenching the salty snack and making it soggy. 

A MESS, you called yourself. This movie was about guns and cars and shit blowing up—but all it took was one tiny little subplot romance scene to break you. LIKE I SAID: A MESS. 

One little stupid ‘be safe’ scene and you were thinking about the time you went to the movies with your ex boyfriend and current love of your life. That time, you had insisted on watching this scary movie but you were getting so unbelievably scared, refusing to leave when your boyfriend offered because you are strong af, so when you resorted to hiding yourself behind his bicep and whimpering instead. Takanobu had enough when he heard you make those sad noises, so he scooped you up from your seat so that you were sitting in his lap. That way, you felt his strong arms around you on boy sides and you were easily able to bury your face in his chest or finish the movie. You finished the movie.🥰

 You would like to say that that was one of the sweetest things that has ever happened to you, but what with being in a relationship with Aone Takanobu for the past year—that absolutely tooth rottenly sweet gesture wouldn’t even crack the Top 10. 

Your tears poured down your cheeks, and you imperceptibly wiped your tears on the sweater of his that you were wearing. Then you realized whose sweater it was and cried even harder! Your heart hurt so much. 

And to make matters worse, you ran out of tissues. 

Knowing that with your luck you’d run into someone you knew if you left now with a completely drenched face. A/N: or turned around :/desperate and sad, you decided to text your friend Takeru about your dilemma. All you asked him for were some tissues because he sort of knew what you were going through even though you didn’t spell it out for him. You hoped he could help for now and then later tonight you’d send him back the money he spent on his movie or something. You kept erasing the message but decided to send it when others in your row were possibly on to the fact that you were sniffling so much for more serious reasons. 

You sent it. Received a response within seconds saying he was on his way. 

Nakashima stumbled in to your the theatre not long after. You waved to him where you were seated in the dark, and he came over like a good friend, giving you a brand new popcorn and a set of tissues. You smiled weakly at the kind gesture and remembered that Aone is the entire reason why this boy Takeru is even here right now. Your tears re-established themselves as your date on this your solo movie night as you leaned your head on Nakashima’s shoulder, who told you that if Aone broke up with you he was an idiot. 

“I’m the idiot,” You whispered to him, because even if it was just a fleeting thought—Aone didn’t deserve any blame. Ever. He is undoubtedly the best person on this planet. “It’s me,” You whispered again, glad that your whiney voice was no match for the volume of the explosions on screen. You blew your nose in a tissue and resumed your position on Takeru’s shoulder. The gesture was platonic enough, but you realized then and there that there was only one shoulder you felt comfortable leaning on, whether it was friendly or not. You sat back up in your seat and met the gaze of a concerned volleyball player.  

“Takeru, I’m so sorry. Can you bring me home—“ the request died on your tongue as you witnessed, or at least you think you did— a dark blur of a a large body with…silver? No, white hair racing down the stairs as if he’d been pushed down them. The figure turned on its heels and fled the theatre in a faster speed than should be possible for a body so large. 

The oddness stopped you in your tracks for a second.

Why did that person-?

You were confused, until a waft of fresh mountainous breeze hit your nostrils, making you gasp. It was The best scent in the world. The scent that was vaguely imbedded in the sweater you were wearing. The scent that belonged to—oh God. You choked on your tears.

“Was that…..?” Your tear stained face scrunched together, trying to piece two-and-two together as your losty brain overworked itself. 

“What were you going to say? You want a drive home?” You could faintly hear Nakashima’s question even though he was right beside you. You were too busy thinking about how that couldn’t have been Aone who stormed out of here, would he choose this movie—oh my—

Lightbulb turning on, you whipped your entire upper body around and searched the seats for someone recognizable. While your scanning stopped momentarily on a few students from school, they ultimately swam to the person or persons you were looking for: There! Kenji-san and Koganagewa-san, two males who were looking at you and Takeru as if you two were the villains in the movie that just popped out of the screen. 

So that WAS Aone!

Why didn’t he come say hi?! 

Your heart started racing. Because you loved him. 

But if that was Aone..... 

Then why did he leave in such a hurry like that…?

And why were his friends looking at you and Nakashima like we…..?

Hold on. 

Your eyes take a mind of their own, whipping from Futakuchi, to Kanji, to Takeru, to Takeru’s shoulder that you ere just laying on, back to the vacant seat where Aone must have been sitting in the between his two friends, and then you looked down at your sweater—his sweater. You thought back to Aone’s shattered expression when you broke up with him by the Ferris wheel and then you saw your own brisk walk from that night redone in his body in the way he just left this theatre blur.

Oh no, You thought. Did this look like a…? With Takeru…?!

OH GOD NO. 

Your heart dropped like one of those rides at the amusement park: 

“Y/N. Are you okay? You look like you’re going to be sick! I can bring you home if you— Y/N? Y/N WAIT LET ME GET MY KEYS—!“ 

You were already gone, leaving your purse, wallet, phone and everything behind—not having to jump over anyones legs to run down the stairs and out of the theatre. You weren’t as fast as Aone, not by a long shot—but you’d be surprised how fast a girl can move when she’s running to the love of her life. 

Running around the empty theatre because everyone was watching a movie, you quickly checked the boys bathroom (not caring that you shouldn’t be in there) before realizing it was empty and then sprinting outside in to the cold night. 

Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone, you chanted. 

Your head snapped left and right, eyes scanning the parking lot for Aone’s car, and when you spotted it signalling and waiting to make a right out of the theatre, you dangerously raced toward it! Heart pumping, you jumped in front of the vehicle with both hands extended in front of you as if you had the strength to stop the car from moving if you could. 

The horn of the car honked dramatically, followed by a head that was not your Mountain Man’s sticking out the window to shout profanities at you to get the fuck out of the way. 

Stepping back shakily, you automatically went back to scanning the lot again for the same 4 wheeler, because locating that car was ALL that mattered right now. 

Finding HIM was all that mattered.

You had to be more cautious now in your search. More purposeful. 

Far back, hundreds of meters from where you were standing you could make out a car that you somehow knew was his. Something, just something, told you it was, and your heart started racing even faster. The lights had turned on like the driver was about to leave, and then it shut off again as if the driver changed their mind about leaving. Without thinking about it, only listening to the pull in your heart that said your man was over there, you used your years of cheerleading experience to catapult you toward the parked vehicle.

When you got closer, your heart squeezed on its own accord as if someone was making pizza dough with it. Slowing down, you took in the sight that was your ex boyfriend sitting in the driver’s seat of his car, white hair visible only because his head was down, forehead kissing the steering wheel, his shoulders vibrating slightly because he is crying. It’s him.

Position:

Not stopping to think anymore, acting on pure love and instinct, you sped over to the driver’s side and tugged the door open. Thank God it was unlocked.

This giant mountain man didn’t move from his position crying on the steering wheel. Only muttering a broken, “Kenji-san, please leave me—“

“Not Justin Bieber look-alike!” You croaked loudly, heart pounding when this gorgeous man’s head lifted as soon as you uttered your first syllable. He looked you up and down and your breath caught in your throat. You’ve NEVER seen such a beautiful man cry before, and although it tugged at what was left of your heart—you thought he looked breathtaking. 

“Y/N…..? D-did Kenji-san send you out-t-t he-here? I apolo-pologize—“

You shook your head, unable to stop yourself from pouring your heart out. 

“Hey. Remember the other day after you helped me film my cheerleading tryout, you said that you were happy we were fr-friends?” You asked sharply, ignoring his apology for now, and forever grateful for the fact that you had major cojones when you wanted to. They came in handy at times like this. 

With red puffy eyes, Aone wiped his face and then nodded, making you melt. 

“Well,” You took a shaky breath, sliding your own tears to the side before you left your heart out on the table for this man. 

“Well, I’m not your friend, Aone.” 

Aone visibly swallowed, his eyes welling up with tears again. He hated himself so much for crying like this. 

“I-I know, not y-yet, bu-but I was hoping one day you’d-d—“ Mountain man didn’t even know what he wanted to say, he was dead.

“No. I’m not your friend.” You repeated yourself, watching a shiver run through Takanobu due to the chill in your voice and the intensity your eyes held.

You could sense that he wasnt getting where you were going with this play on words, so you cut to the chase. Hopefully he would get it after hearing what he had to say next, just like you did when he said these same words to you once in a bowling alley. 

“The reason I can’t be your friend is because I like you so much more than a friend, Aone. You have no idea how much more.” 

Aone shivered again, his beautiful lips separating because his jaw dropped slightly. He recognized his words on your lips now, you could tell. He was understanding how you felt now, so you continued anxiously:

“Everything about you drives me absolutely insane, Takanobu. Your spirit, your love, the way you are the only man I will ever love……even the way you can’t notice that your ex is still madly in love with you, and that she only came here tonight to cry over you alone but ran into someone, and even though she was dumb enough to break up with you.”

Aone’s jaw had just dropped wider as you spoke, his mind reeling. 

You stepped in closer to where he was sitting in his car, closing the distance because you just couldn’t stand being any further from him anymore. You also wanted to whisper this next part. You wanted him to know that his confession to you was etched in your brain so much so that you could recite it in a moments notice, even if that said moment was full of pure emotional madness like right now. 

“I’m not your friend, Aone.” You repeated once again. “I don’t want to be. I want to be everything else for you. Everything more. Takanobu, I have a confession to make.” You used both of your cold hands to cup his cheeks, his beautiful, red, stubble filled, wet cheeks.

“I love you. I love you, my Mountain Man. I love you more than I did yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that. I loved you on the Ferris wheel, and I loved you when you filmed my tryouts. I love you Right now, and I will forever. I will explain everything, I promise. But there has never been, nor will there ever be anyone else for me other than you, Aone-san.” 

You giggled through your tears because Takanobu looked so confused but happy. It was an odd expression, but very cute. You continued, 

“I know we get called Losties a lot which used to bother me, but you know what: maybe we are, but that’s besides the point—because all I know is that I used to hate being called that…. Until I met you.” You leaned in so that your foreheads were touching. “When I met you, Aone-san....... I stopped caring about being lost….... none of it mattered to me.......insofar as we were lost together. Together with you is the only way I want to go through life, Aone, so I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry for letting my insecurities drive me and I’m sorry for possibly confessing to you when you have someone else. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m—“

Mountain Man imitated your gesture of cupping your cheeks in his large hands, wiping away your tears like you did to him. 

And then, without saying another word like he was good at—

He slid you into his lap sitting in the front seat, back in the same position he pulled you in the last time you two were at this theatre—

and then he kissed you. 

It was a kiss so passionate that you gasped into it, needing him, needing him like a hiker needed their mountain. A kiss so passionate it l lasted for the remaining duration of the movie (no word of a lie) because you refused to let each other go—but most importantly: it was a kiss that made you realize that you and Mountain Man weren’t just two losties lost together like you mentioned a bit ago—no. Absolutely not. Actually, this kiss was so passionate it made you realize that you were really two losties that were lost in every aspect in life—minus one:

Because you two could never be lost when it came to your feelings for one another. Finding true love happened to be the only aspect of life that most people on this planet remained lost in, which happened to be the exact aspect of life where you and Aone have both been….

Found. 

🐢

🐢

🐢

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A/N: That’s it! I am secretly here to let y’all know that there will be one more collection post next time I write, and that post will be the end of this losty series. I will cry when that time comes lmao but for now tysm for reading this marathon - I would loooove to hear your thoughts! I literally die when you guys comment or send me private messages reacting. It makes my whole day istg. Anyways, Wishing you all the best as always. See you next time. Xoxo

Taglist: @galagcica @chaichai-the-weeb @nairobiisqueen @bisasterrr @juminly @simply-not-the-same @marvelousbakugou @qyuanon