#i remember seeing him for the first time and being like 'ooh he's cute lemme look up his wiki page- OH MY GOD A MASK.. 😳“

[silverselfshippingchaos]

(clenches fist so hard) I'M SO NORMAL ABOUT HIM IN THE MASK I SWEAR I PROMISE I'M NOT INTO THIS

[echantedtoon]

A Lovers' Circle (Poly Haishira x Reader) Ch7 Date Weekend: Sunday

(Or alternative title- Obligatory anime shopping montage. Just an excuse for Y/n to get to know everyone before the real romance starts. I'm using the chart above as headcannons ages for Sanemi's sibs for a modern au for future reference. Short chapter. 

Warnings for some nudity mentioned but nothing NSFW.

Hearts conquered so far: Mitsuri and Gyomei and secretly Kanae.)

Taglist: @shadyd3ar @jcrml @tengensangel

@miniverse-zen @mysteri0uz

Remember if you want to be added to the taglist lemme know

Bright sunlight shown down from the sky and illuminated the entire world in a nice warm glow. Soon fall would be hear turning the leaves shades of yellows, reds, oranges, and brown. Cold weather would soon follow after with the spookiest day of the year right around the year before eventually snow would fall and bring with it icy sidewalks and the likelihood of being pelted by snowballs. 

So it was a good idea to get out and enjoy the warm weather while you could.

"Dammit! Im fine!" Obanai scrunched up his face and narrowed his eyes but didn't stop his girlfriend from pushing his bangs from his face to frown at him.

"But what if you get lost?"

"We're going on a hiking trip to see a waterfall and then we're going to the movies," he deadpanned, "It's not like we're going skydiving."

"I know but what if you run into a wolf? Or a wild bear?! "

His hands were held up bluntly. "We'll be fine. It's not the first time we've been in the woods. You go have fun at the mall."

She still frowned at him but didn't argue- Only reach over to give him a big kiss to his forehead leaving a red lipstick mark he'd wipe off later. Right now they were in front of the local park waiting for everyone else to arrive. Most of them were already there, minus Shinobu who needed to wrap up some last minute emails concerning her part time job at an office and Gyomei who was coming by bus after picking up his .. Girlfriend? Did she count as his girlfriend if they've only been on three dates? He guessed they were still just casually dating right now and testing the waters. Y/n seemed like a nice girl or 'unicorn' as Shinobu put it but he still wasn't too sure what to think..She seemed ok at least to him. Maybe that'll change later but who knows?

The sounds of the park around them continued through the air as kids ran around giggling and squealing their little heads off playing. Swings to be swung, slides to slide, and jungle gyms to climb. Lots of little smiles on little cute faces running around playing or toddling after parents walking around. Or in Sanemi's case allowing his little brothers and sisters to be climb all over him where he stood eating an energy bar in one hand while his other arm was slowly lifted up and down with two little boys and one little girl clinging to him. Three of his little siblings with a fourth standing just standing off to the side. The second oldest other than himself. No doubt babysitting a few of their little siblings today.

Kanae was letting one of their other little sisters mess with her hair and admire how pretty she was. She was rather pretty. However the sounds of a little PING sound took his attention off his friends and towards the pocket on Mitsuri's right side as her hand automatically dug out her phone and looked at the screen. 

"It's Shino! She says she's running late so she's just heading to the mall to meet us there."

"Oh. That's convenient." He didn't think they'd be able to leave on their hiking trip until Mrs. Shinazugawa came back to take over her youngest children. "Anything else from Mei?"

She shook and one of her braids smacked against his cheek. "Nope! But the bus should be here soon! Ooh! This is gonna be so much fun!"

Considering if they'll get here already. They were taking so long and it was already painful enough to have to fork over fifty bucks after loosing that stupid game Tengen decided to make them do. Sigh. Oh well still better than loosing a hundred dollars each. He didn't want to lose that too-

"THEY'RE HERE!"

Well it's about time!

The tall, unmistakable form of Gyomei walked down the road and started making his way towards them walking slower than normal because of the smaller woman walking next to him holding his arm. You smiled at them all and waved an arm at them all as you got close enough to be heard.

"It's about time you all showed up. I was starting to grow a beard from how long it took."

"My apologies." Gyomei smiled despite his apology. "But we're here now. Is everyone else here?"

"Except Shinobu. She's gonna meet the girls at the mall. We still gotta wait for Sanemi's mom to come back before we leave too-" he gestured behind him at the giggling little kids despite Gyomei obviously not being able to see them. "-but she should be back anytime now. The girls can go ahead and leave." 

"Are you sure?" Mitsuri gave him a puppy eyed look. 

"Yeah. We'll be fine. You girls go enjoy your frilly spa day. Well meet up with you after Sanemi drags us to the movies."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

It wasn't him her cupping his face and gifting him a giant smooth to the forehead before excitedly looping an arm around your arm and excitedly began to pull you towards the other girls. In fact you were barely able to shout a goodbye to Gyomei before the unusually strong woman literally dragged you off towards the other girls. They were all there except for Shinobu whom Mitsuri briefed you about meeting you all there, and Kanae who had to wrestle one of Sanemi's baby sisters off her before joining you all there. Mitsuri and Suma both super giddy with excitement.

"This is gonna be great! We're going shopping and then to Salan,Sauna, and Beyond!"

..You blinked. "What's Salon, Sauna, and Beyond?"

As if you had insulted her,her family, her friends, and cat- Suma gasped so loud you jumped as she clutched her turtleneck. "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT SALON, SAUNA, AND BEYOND IS?!"

"Um. No? Should I?"

"YES!," She yelled at you waving her arms around, "It's like only the greatest place ever to get your nails done and get pedicures and it has like these REALLY good massages that help melt stress awa- HEY!!"

MAKIO shoved her head aside with a hand with a deadpanned look. "It's a salon and spa with an attaching sauna room and one. It's a pretty popular place to go unwind and relax."

"Oh. I've never been there before."

"YOU'VE NEVER BEEN THERE?!"

"YOU DON'T HAVE TO REPEAT IT, BLOCKHEAD!!"

"Kanae, tell her to stop being mean to me!"

"Ok. Let's calm down now. C'mon. We don't want to end up missing our bus."

Hinatsuru was lightly surprised you didn't run away or show annoyance at the fighting but remained smiling as Kanae hered the still arguing wives towards the bus station where you first arrived with Gyomei. It also turns out the boys were not going to be going with all of you like they did Friday night and all day Saturday when you weren't around. Instead they planned on having a few hours to just bond with the boys as the girls just bonded with each other which includes a nature hike, movie Sanemi insisted on dragging them too, and then they planned to go somewhere to eat before meeting back up with the girls near the end of the day at the sauna. Sounded like a plan. 

The ride to the mall was pretty generic. On the way there you sat by Mitsuri and talked with her about your pets. Her cats and bunnies and your goldfish you named Goldielocks.  It was a peaceful ride up to the ginormous building that was your city's local mall complete with a lot of stores inside. And conveniently waiting for you all in the parking lot was Shinobu, eating what looked like a granola bar while she was waiting for you all to show up by the entrance. It got a raised brow from Makio.

"Really?"

Shinobu shrugged again looking at you all. "You all were taking too long. I got hungry and ate something."

"Too long? It's eight in the morning still!"

"Let's not fight anyone! I wanna swing by CePora's! They have this new Summer's End eye shadow palette I've been wanting!" 

"I think the yellows and oranges would look good on Makio," you added trying to get the group moving, "Let's go in and see if it's still there!" Your arm gestured towards the large building.

Luckily that seemed to have worked and the group ended up being dragged by Mitsuri all the way to the escalator and up to the second floor where she then proceeded to not stop until she was dashing through the automatic front doors of the famous make up chain of stores. It was ok. You got a cute little compact mirror in the shape of a Tanuki so it all worked out before someone directed your group towards the check out and then a few different stores. This time a few clothes stores.

Honestly you were surprised one mall could have five different clothes stores and no one seemed to care. 

Your attention was mainly upon the plethora of outfits Suma and Mitsuri thrusted into your arms and insisted you try on because-

"You'd look even cuter next to Gyomei if you wore these!"

Nice to know that they cared about their friend at leas and you did end up liking a few of the outfits so that was a plus. Until Hinatsuru pointed out something with a gentle hand on your shoulder. 

"Hey. We've been going to all the places we like. It's not fair to Y/n to just drag her everywhere without stopping where she wants to go as our guest. Let's go where she wants." She smiled at you. "Pick wherever you want to go, Y/n."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes! Where do you want to go?"

"Well, there's a bookstore here that has a new recipe book on deserts from Canada I'd really like to get."

"Consider it done!"

It was a nice trip to said bookstore where Mitsuri bought herself at least three romance novels and you think Shinobu got herself a book of space sciences. It was another small thrift store or two before it had occured to you all that it was noon already and you all were very hungry. Mitsuri's immediately reaction was to suggest going to the resident cat cafe, but knowing her appetite Shinobu suggested that you all go to the other mall restaurant that had an all you can eat buffet instead. Yeah. That was probably the better idea considering that Mitsuri had finished off her twelveth plate by 12:45 and about ready to go back for her thirteenth. You weren't even done with your own plate yet but giggled as she looked at you in question before you held up a napkin to her and smiled sweetly.

"Here. You have some gravy on your cheek from the mashed potatoes."

She blinked at the kind gesture but smiled widely. "Thanks!"

It was a mutual agreement that they approved of your gesture by the many smiles you've gotten from them. "So, Y/n. How's your day so far?"

You beamed brightly. "It's been wonderful! I can't remember the last time I've had so much fun!"

"Don't you go to the mall?"

You shook your head. "Only sometimes if I need to pick up something or if I'm shopping with my family. I don't really have a lot of friends who're free or like to go shopping with me."

"You don't have friends?"

"Well...Not a lot. My one friend is usually working and studying hard for his bachelor's and he's already busy enough with his boyfriend so we don't get to hang out as much as we used to."

"AW! That's so sad! It's ok!" You were suddenly grasped up into the arms of one pink haired girl who squeezed you tight enough to make you wheezed and pop a few of your bones as she hugged you to her. "We'll be your friends now! We can go on trips and I can do your nails and-"

"Mitsi! You're suffocating her there!"

Green eyes blinked before looking down at your pale face before she squealed out and pushed you away with a worried look. "Sorry, sorry, sorry! Oh my gosh! Are you ok?!"

You slowly gasped a lungful of air after getting squeezed like a lemon before nodding. "Y-Yeah. I'm ok." 

If you counted being squeezed like an orange ok. But you weren't going to fault her for it especially since she's been so nice to you so far. After a moment of you all just talking, mostly about what they were doing for classes starting Monday tomorrow or what they all did at the beach together yesterday when the waiter stopped by the large table to collect the dirty dishes ..and gave an annoyed dirty look at Mitsuri who was scarfing down the remainder of her thirteenth plate before adding it to the stack he had to take away eventually.

"Eh...Is there anything else I can get you ladies?," he asked despite still eyeing the stack of plates with narrowed eyes. His tone not hiding his annoyance either.

"Can I get some of the devil's food cake on the menu?" Mitsuri beamed up at him widely as his nose wrinkled up. 

"I'm sorry but we're OUT," he bluntly stated before reluctantly grabbing the tall stack of dishes and grunting annoyed. "Can I get anyone else anything?"

Mitsuri blinked giving a glance at the stack of dishes the waiter was forced to carry away before guiltily and ashamedly looking down at her own hands. It caused a chain reaction of glares and frowns from the other girls glaring at him annoyed back.

"No. Just bring us the check."

The waiter seemed annoyed still but relieved to start collecting everyone else's plates adding it to the big pile in his arms before pausing as you gently reached out to gently tug on his sleeve and smiled politely. "May I please have some of the devil's food cake on the menu? Just add it to my part of the check please."

Now this time every gave you wide eyed looks at the audacity of the situation especially when Mitsuri was literally right THERE next to you but the waiter was all too happy to smile at you. "But of course. Give me just a minute to get back to you."

"Thank you very much!"

There was just dumbfounded silence as he walked away after picking up Kanae's dishes and hauling them away from the stunned group as you all sat there stunned other than you who only smiled... Eventually Mitsuri broke the silence with a mumble. 

"I thought they were out."

"What the heck, Y/n?!," Makio demanded as you just smiled at her as she gestured to Mitsuri and you. "She's right there! Did you freaking forget or something?!"

"Oh no. I know exactly what I'm doing."

"Why you-"

"Makio, calm down. We can't stop her from buying her own dessert if she's paying for it herself." Despite Kanae's soft tone, her look was obviously disapproving. "It's not like we can demand someone that they can't eat something."

Makio didn't say anything but she shot you a glare as you still smiled at her and Mitsuri sunk down further into her seat as everyone awkwardly waited for the checks to be delivered along with your dessert. About five minutes later the same waiter returned looking a little less annoyed but still had that blunt tone to him as he placed down at least seven checks for you all and a second later a VERY big delicious smelling, mouth watering, chocolate upon chocolate cake slice in front of you. 

"Here you are, Ma'am."

"Oh thank you! If you wait just a second, I'll give you your tip!" You clasped your hands happily as he smiled at you... Before you bluntly reached over, grabbed the plate, picked it up, and just placed it back down in front of Mitsuri who blinked in surprise. "Look, Mitsuri! They had some after all and what luck we were able to get you the last piece!" Her eyes widened bigger at you. "Aren't you lucky?"

Everyone stared gobsmacked as you just hummed along going to dig around in your purse for a second to pull out a five dollar bill before holding it up to the waiter whom looked like he was slapped across the face. The moment you waved the bill in his face, he glared at you before snatching it from your hand and stomping away from you table. There was another awkward moment as you left the thirty dollars for your part of the meal on the table before you blinked at the wide eyed stares given to you.

"What? Did I get her the wrong cake?"

Instead of an answer you were given a squeal from Mitsuri and then after another bone crushing hug as she hugged you with a large smile. "THANK YOU SO MUCH!  THIS IS LIKE THE NICEST THING A NEW PERSON HAS EVER DONE FOR ME!!"

You smiled wider looking at her. "No need to thank me. You shouldn't be treated badly just because of your appetite." She blinked as you patted her arms. "That guy's a jerk. Forget about him and just enjoy your cake. My treat."

She continued to stare at you before her face turned to a bright red and her hands let go of you to clasp her cheeks. "I-I don't know what to say. Oh my- Such a gesture!"

"You don't have to say anything. Just enjoy yourself. Sorry if I didn't explain it earlier."

"Oh. So that's why you ordered it." 

Makio slowly relaxed as you nodded.... Oblivious to the lovestruck, blushing face Mitsuri was giving you before you slowly got up to excuse yourself to the bathroom and asked them to watch your shopping bags in the meantime. The SECOND you disappeared from sight, Mitsuri slammed a determined palm down on the table and clenched a fist.

"Ok! It's official! Let's do all we can to get her together with Gyomei! She's absolutely perfect!"

"Huh? Where did this come from?"

"Oh..N-No where but we owe it to Mei to try and get him a great girlfriend like he deserves! So let's make her feel welcome! I mean like c'mon! She's literally perfect! She even tipped the waiter so we didn't have to!"

"Are you..blushing?"

"N-NO! I'm just very flattered at the gesture!"

By the time you got back, Mitsuri was already done eating and giddy again especially when you came back. The group gathered up the bags and decided to stop by two more small shops to pick up some pre-ordered stuff Tengen already paid for (a canvas and a box of hard to get paints) before they ushered you back out of the mall and on the street. At least four shopping bags hung from your own arms as Mitsuri held your hand and pulled you along behind her continuing to babble on about...Well you lost track after the part where she told you about how she got into ballet but you politely listened since she seemed so happy now dragging you down the road as cars drove by and people passed by on the sidewalk.

The building they stopped in front of was a smaller building than the mall but still bigger than your house. The sign on the front saying Salon, Sauna, and Beyond. Ah! So this must be the place that they were so excited to go. You allowed Mitsuri to excitedly drag you in after the others and the nice smells of rose air freshener hit your nose along with the cool air from the ac. The inside of the building was mostly white with a few paintings on the wall, some soft looking chairs, and a reception desk where a middle aged woman smiled at you all. Ah. This must've been the waiting area. 

The woman smiled at the group and waved a hand. "Good afternoon. Are you here to book an appointment?"

"I have a reservation for a group under Kocho actually!"

The lady took a moment to rummage around on her desk and look for something.. before nodded and happily looked at Shinobu. "Of course! We have your party booked for our three o clock reservation. If you'll follow me, you can get a locker for your belongings before proceeding to the salon floor."

In an instant Mitsuri looked excitedly at you. "Have you ever been to an onsen before, Y/n?"

You nodded. "My cousin had everyone go to one for her bachelorette party, so I've been to one once."

"Oh you'll love it then! The water is from natural hot springs so it's got minerals that's really good for your skin! But first we're getting our nails done and-"

And off she went again. 

It was ok still. You still were going to have a good time. It was just a small matter of getting a small safe place to put your shoes and bags before following the others to the other section of the salon separate from the onsen addition. Other an an older woman getting highlights in her hair, your group had the entire place to yourselves. 

It was a strange and new but not unpleasant experience there. After all you've never had your nails done let alone had anyone else take a nail file to your nails or had your feet soaked before getting a pedicure for the first time. As said it wasn't a bad experience just new. However you declined the massage offered to you. By the time three hours had passed and everyone had a turn to everything that was offered to them(none of you noticing the second group being escorted towards the onsen), it was time for the onsen according to Suma. There was only one problem however-

"Hey. Um..I don't know how any other way to say this,  but I don't feel comfortable washing with you all before we go to the onsen."

You weren't actually planning on getting into any onsens either and was just going to sit on the edge as they soaked, but you had to bath before going into the onsen and you didn't feel comfortable doing that as a group. Luckily Shinobu seemed very understanding and smiled at you. 

"That's fine. We're not going to make you do something you're not comfortable with so why don't you want outside for about fifteen minutes? We'll all be done by then and you can join us when you're done."

You sighed relieved. "That's great!"

"Good. When you're done just go through the doorway and down the hall. We'll be through the green door."

"Ok! I'll remember that!"

Guess who decided to show up in your life again? Yep that's right. Bad luck.

You had waited outside of the bathing area with the long fluffy white robe and the soap the spa ladies had given you to use and waited about twenty minutes for them all to get done (an extra five minutes just to be sure) before deciding to see if everyone was clear. A quick shout didn't get any response and a careful peek inside revealed that indeed no one else was in the room. Perfect! You were able to scrub down really quick and change into the robe you were given before wrapping a towel around your hair. Now let's see. Shinobu said they'd be in the room down the hall from here through the green door. Perfect! Easiest directions ever!

...or it would've been if you weren't staring at two exactly identical green doors at the end of the hall. 

You stood there dumbfounded staring between the doors again. There was a sign saying which one was the men's section.. unfortunately it had fallen off the wall where it was hung up and for some reason had been kicked to the middle of the hall so you had no idea which door it had been hanging above. Was someone trying to play a joke?! Or did no one notice the sign on the floor?! Or did they just not care and just kick it out of the way?! Either way you were screwed in this situation. Great.

Ultimately you decided to go through the right door. There was no one else in the spa besides yourself, your group, and the employees. The worst you'd do is enter an empty room or run into an employee who you'd just explain that you were were lost, and you might just run into the group. So you didn't think when you pushed open the door. When you stepped inside. When you smiled at first hearing the sloshing sounds of water. When you called out happily.

"Hey! I'm sorry I took so long! I got lost so-"

You froze as at least six heads turned to look at you in the doorway. 

It felt like an eternity to process what you were seeing as your mind just blue screened, but at the same time it felt like someone dropped a boulder into your stomach and jabbed ice into your veins with a syringe. There was definitely a group occupying the onsen in here alright...however it was uh...

They were definitely not girls. 

Six pairs of eyes stared at you. Some frozen in shock, some confusion, and at least in Sanemi's case it was a big 'wtf' look. Speaking of which-

IT WAS THE WRONG DAM ROOM!!

The boys all stared at you from somewhere in the room. Rengoku, Tengen, and Sanemi from in the water. Obanai sitting on the ledge looking wide eyed frozen at you with a towel around his middle and his mask still on his face. And Gyomei and Giyuu standing off to the side looking like they had been having a conversation but stopped when you walked in. However-

HOW WERE THEY ALL SO RIPPED-

"*ahem*" Eventually it was Gyomei who broke the extremely awkward silence by clearing his throat making you jump and calmly gesturing a hand back to the door. "Y/n, I believe you meant to enter through the o-other door."

"IMSOSORRY!!OHMYGOD-"

The door all but slammed behind your quickly disappearing form and the sound of your quickly retreating footsteps left everyone else staring there stunned in the aftermath.. before Tengen snickered body shaking lightly before his entire head was thrown back with his loud booming laughter echoed off the tiled walls.

"HAHAHAHAHA!! Well if she didn't think you were good looking before she does now!," he loudly announced with more laughter that turned into sputters and coughs once Sanemi splashed water into his face.

You didn't mention anything about this to the others. Didn't even answer them when they asked what took you you so long and why your face was burnt red. You only squealed out that you got lost but didn't answer anything else. Thankfully they didn't push it and you were able to try to forget about it..but failed. You were horrified by the time you all left and the guys were literally RIGHT THERE  in the lobby and...

Absolutely chill?

They didn't look the least bit out of the ordinary and just greeted their girlfriends like it was any other day except for Tengen who gave you a deeply amused smile but before he could say anything Obanai kicked his leg hard enough to make him wince. So hopefully he wouldn't be telling anyone else about this- A gentle large hand placed on your shoulder causes you to jump out of your stupor and snap up to a concerned looking Gyomei. 

"Are you alright?," his tone was gentle and concerned. "If you're uncomfortable being around after..*ahem*" His own face dawned a light pink. "I-I can pay for a taxi to take you home."

"N-No! I-It's ok! That was m-m-my fault! Um...How was your hike?" You quickly changed the subject.

Taking the hint he nodded clearing his throat. "I-It was wonderful. The forest was very vibrant with life and the waterfall was especially alive. There's not really anything that sounds quite as powerful as the Earth's own power."

"It sounds beautiful."

"It was."

*Until Sanemi dragged us to that ghost story knock off."

"HEY!!" You turned to catch Sanemi pointed and angry hand to Obanai. "SUPERNATURAL ACTIVITY TWO IS A FANTASTIC HORROR MOVIE! WAY BETTER THAN THAT SNAKE CRAP SHOW YOU BROUGHT!!"

"YOU DON'T KNOW GOOD STORYLINES WHEN YOU SEE THEM!!"

"That is enough!" The sudden shout from the otherwise soft spoken Gyomei was so out of the ordinary that it made everyone turn on the spot in shock and surprise. His face turned down on a frown towards the both of them. "This entire day was supposed to be about spending time with one another not argue over who has better taste in films. Further more you both are being very inconsiderate to make such fools of yourself in front of our guest for this trip. Now will you both please kindly stop going at each other's throats?"

There was a stunned small moment of silence as the both of them slowly relaxed back looking suddenly guilty. After another few seconds Gyomei nodded before looking back to you apologetically. 

"I'm very sorry."

"It's ok. I really don't mind anyways." 

"No. It's not ok. We were supposed to relax today without any fighting. They promised and now-.." He just sighed. "It's getting late and we all have classes and work tomorrow. We should all return home and get a good night's sleep. Do you need me to drop you off?"

You shook your head at him. "No it's ok. I can walk home after I take the bus back." 

"Then allow me to walk you home. It's the least I can do."

After such a kind gesture,how could you say no? That's what lead to you both walking down the street with your arms linked and the sun barely in the sky, and him carrying your bags in his other hand even though you told him he didn't have to but he insisted. It made a warm fluttery feeling go off in your chest that barely let you register saying goodbye to everyone else. And you definitely didn't see the way Mitsuri was giving you the 'first crush' eyes or the very approving look Kanae gave you. Only focusing on the fact that you were home now and the good feelings in your chest didn't go away even when he handed over your bags. 

"Thank you for walking me home."

He smiled. "As I said before it's the least I could do. I'm just happy you had fun with the girls today. I hope Mitsuri and Suma weren't too overwhelming. I know they can be a lot." 

"No they're great! I had so much fun. It's the best time I had for a long time to be honest." 

He chuckled too and looked like he was going to say something but at the same moment and elderly couple smiled at you while walking into the building next to your home. "Oh look, Dear. A young man walking his lady home. How charming. I remember when you used to walk me everywhere-"

"Oh no. He's not my boyfri-..He is?"

The look of surprise on his face as his head turned to you wide eyed. "I am?"

There was a silence other than the chatting older couple just entering into the building and leaving you both alone staring at each other for a long moment. Eventually you looked down at your feet and rubbed your arm.

"I-I mean.. Would you like to be?"

His white eyes widened to the size of plates as he was taken aback before the brightest shade of red came over him as he just.. couldn't believe it. Before a big smile replaced the shock and he nodded. "Y-YES! I mean- *ahem* I would like that very much. However are you sure you'd like to have me for a boyfriend. I will not sugarcoat the obvious." A hand gestured to his face. "I am blind and scarred."

"If I was really shallow to not date because of looks, then I wouldn't have agreed to that first date with you."

"I am seeing other people whom I love and care about very much. .. I'm not going to break up with them or any other outrageous demands."

"I wouldn't even dream of asking you to break up with them! I think they're wonderful people so I couldn't ask you that. And it's not going to be me dating them. I'm going to be dating you and I'm ok with that." You smiled. "You're the first guy I dated that's been completely honest with me and so kind. It makes me feel like I'm the luckiest person in the world."

"I-... Don't speak like that please."

You blinked. "Huh. Why?"

"Be-Because the beauteous genuity of your words only make you sound more beautiful to my mind."

Huh. You were both closer than he remembered. Just a few inches from one another twinkling under the lights. And you blinked at the sudden closeness too. Face going a dim pink and a few chuckles from the moment escaping you. Barely anyone was outside now, too busy inside mingling, eating the food, and enjoying the evening. So it was just you two. Alone out here with nothing but each other for company. His mind felt completely blank and numb but in a good way, compelling him to reach his hands up and cup a cheek of yours something his rational brain wouldn't allow himself to do. Inches away now. You didn't move away.

He stared at the woman in front of him, this silly silly woman with the beautiful voice. If he was watching this as an outsider, he would've laughed at how they were literally just strangers less than a while ago, but right now it didn't seem any of that or anything else mattered. Not even the topic they had been discussing just a few seconds ago. Or removing the hand that now cupped her cheek. Maybe it really was a mutual madness they both shared or some form of chaos in their lives, but right now....With them being so close...And so vulnerable. It was only natural of course-.. It's what soulmates do-.. Of course they would since-...

They kissed.

"Hey. Do you think Gyomei is going to be angry at us still?" Sanemi gave his girlfriend a glum look as she patted his back. 

"Of course not. He's just stressed trying to make a good impression is all. I'm sure he'll be just fine." Her boyfriend didn't look convinced as he gave her a pout. Oh well. She was distracted anyways by the ringing of her phone in her pocket to which she promptly pulled out and automatically held up to her ear. "Hello?"

"Kanae! Quickly I need help!"

She blinked as Gyomei's voice cut through the phone. "Mei? Are you ok? What happened?"

"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO BOYFRIEND!!"

[cascade05]

Book Girl

Heads up: Language, suggestive but definitely not descriptive, also Bakugo Katsuki (he comes with a warning), and unedited—super unedited

Kay, so, hear me out… Bakugo Katsuki and an author reader. Yes, ooh, ahh, I know I know. For those of you, and I am sure there are many, who have no idea what I mean, lemme explain:

Bakugo with a reader who asks him the strangest, borderline worrisome question about his work. “What’s it feel like to get stabbed?” “Have you ever gotten shot? With a gun? Explain it to me. How did it feel?” Sometimes he thinks you’re a little psycho but it’s oddly therapeutic for him to explain the worst parts of his job and not care about being judged so he don’t mind none.

Bakugo with a reader who patches up his wounds like a pro and mumble “this would be perfect in chapter twelve.” And he’s just staring at her like “ma’m I’m dying plz don’t immortalize this in literature.”

Most importantly (the thought that had me on this tangent), Bakugo Katsuki with his cute little writer baby who tests things on him. It’s never easy to deal with things either. It’s not, like, fighting related things. You don’t go up to him and ask him if you could put him in arm-bar or ask him if he could put you in an arm-bar (Actually you did ask him to do that cause you wanted to know how to get out of one but—)

She does this… thing where she goes up to him and whispers the nastiest shit in his ear, like, you know, innocent book girl shit. Ya’ll know what I mean. Book girls are fucking wild and they read the sauciest shit. So she whispers some knee numbing curse and Bakugo freezes like a little schoolboy who just found out what puberty hormones are and she has the audacity to take a step back, examine him like he’s a fucking lab rat or some shit, then ask him if that made his heart flutter. Like, bitch it made something flutter, the hell did you think saying that would do? Does he answer? The first few times it happened, he couldn’t. The next few times he tried to deny it but mumbled and slurred his words like a drunk. When he wasn’t caught horribly off guard, he started just throwing her over his shoulder and showing her what it did to him. (It really helped her with that one scene—)

But that’s not the worst of it. No. No no no. You see, before Bakugo, she had never been in a relationship before. She had never been in love before and she most certainly had never done anything physical with someone else before. He was her first everything. So she has trouble writing particularly steamy scenes, at least when it comes to describing everything and it has to be perfect. Well, that’s what a boyfriend’s for, right?

So, there are times in Bakugo’s life where his writer girlfriend just decides to make out with him. That’s a normal thing to do, they’re together, but she doesn’t just kiss him. Remember, book girl shit, girl goes fucking—well, Bakugo doesn’t know what but it’s ridiculous.

Kay, first time it happens: She comes up to him all casually and cute-like and asks if she can try something. Blissfully unaware Bakugo raises a brow but lets her and she takes his breath away with a kiss that’s all passion and it’s hot—he’s hot. He’s melting, actually, and she takes it further and put her hands in exactly the right places and just when he’s getting ready to go all the way with it, she pulls back. Bakugo’s never felt whiplash quite so jarring but there she was asking him how it felt because she wants to write the scene from a man’s perspective. She asking him all these questions and bro’s on a different planet right now, he can’t answer, kay. Like, give him a second to breathe cause he can’t find the air, ya know. And it happens, well not all the time but enough for the poor man to think she just isn’t in to him like he’s in to her. If she was, she would��ve been frustrated too, right? But she wasn’t and there he was, sitting alone like a fool while she ran off to go write it all down before she forgot.

But, well, book girls, right? Those freaky shits know how to please a guy so you can bet your bottom dollar that she made it up to him. Thoroughly :)

Or, alternatively, writer gf who doesn’t write steamy shit and just does all of this to fuck with him cause his reactions are *chief’s kiss*

[ryus3i]

Sanzu x fem reader

Genre; fluff

Word Count; 1.3k

A/n; I can’t remember if I read something super similar to this or I just thought about it a lot but this whole idea seems very familiar too me. Plz lemme know if I accidentally copied someone or Dm if I copied you.

There wasn’t a single person in the entirety of Bonten who didn’t know of your anger. You were a fairly calm person who tends to avoid conflict like the plague, but when it came to your husband Harichiyo Sanzu and his dumbass you were a bomb ready to diffuse.

There have been multiple occurrences of you blowing up on the bonten executives. The root of each occurrence being Haruchiyo, he always finds a way to light your fuse, like the time he lit your hair on fire after he tried to surprise you with a birthday cake or when he accidentally gave your little pug chocolate. In both cases Haruchiyo got yelled at, was ignored and had to beg for forgiveness from you, all in that order.

When those two wonderful pink lines introduced you to a new member of your family Haruchiyo promised you he would get his shit together and be the best father he could be for your little one.

Those nine months were probably the best months of your life. Haru was so sweet, caring and loving, not that he wasn’t before you were pregnant but life was just so peaceful.

But now that your son was a bubbling two year old, Haru is back to his dumbasery but now he is sure to include your baby boy.

—— “Sweetie, come here”, you say, beckoning your son towards the kitchen and away from the pug laying on his lap.

“Sweetie, you're going to stay with daddy today while mommy works, okay?” you explained to the little boy who had climbed into his designated chair in the kitchen.

“Yay! Wanna see Uncle Winwin and Wan!” Your son still wasn’t able to pronounce his r’s but that’s alright, you found it quite cute.

“Right, but make sure you let them and your daddy work before you play” you remind him, “and make sure you give these to Uncle Mikey, tell him mommy made them for him” you say pointing to the white bag on the counter.

Your work as you mentioned before was your bakery, the cute little building where you spent countless hours of your day and also the fateful place where you met your husband.

He came in one day late at night demanding you patch him up and give him taiyaki so his boss wouldn’t kill him.

That day was when Mikey had first tasted your delicious taiyaki, soon after that Haru became a regular, returning to your shop whenever he could, picking up batches of sweets day after day and from there he became your boyfriend and now your husband and a father to your child.

“Ooh lemme get one” Haruchiyo says, greedily trying to open the white bag sealed with a sticker of your logo.

“No, you two have had quite enough sweets” you say, slapping his hand away. “These are specifically for Mikey and Mikey only. I need his opinion on these new recipes”.

“Come on baby I just want one, I’ll even split with Hachiro” he says, roping your little boy in the process.

“No. I have to get going now, I’ll see you two later” you say making your way towards Hachiro. Everyday before you left for the bakery you made sure to give your boys kisses.

“Bye Mommy, I love you” Hachiro lets out as he returns your embrace around his little body.

“Love you too baby” you respond before wrapping your arms around Haruchiyo’s waist and place a kiss on his lips.

“Bye babe” he says as you let go of his waist.

“I’ll drop by to check up on you two later” you say, grabbing your keys and heading out the door.

——

“What the fuck is going on here” you blurt after taking one step into Bontens main office. The bakery was fairly slow today so you decided to visit Haru and Hachiro. You had brought some cupcakes from the bakery for everyone, after feeling bad for not giving them any taiyaki.

You expected Hachiro to be running around the office with his uncles and dad chasing after him with Koko in the corner typing away and Mikey working in his private office.

What you did not expect was paper spread across the floor, chairs flipped over, desks emptied out and Kokonoi who was about to pull his white locks out. And top of all of that Hachiro and Sanzu were nowhere to be found.

Placing your things down on the closest desk you walk towards Koko, you need to find out what sort of chaos occurred here.

“Koko what happened here?” you question.

“Fucking Sanzu, lost Hachiro. Hachiro came crying in Sanzu’s arms earlier, whining for something. Sanzu kept typing to calm him down but he wouldn’t listen, being Sanzu’s son after all, eventually he gave up and put him on the floor and started to work. When he went to give him his bento he was gone”.

“Why was he crying, he was so happy to come here this morning?” You explain to Koko, Sanzu must have done something after you left.

Speak of the devil your frantic husband runs into the room. His pink hair disheveled and sweat dripped from his face.

“Koko, help me find the little shit before y/n kills me”, Haruchiyo screams at Koko running his hands through his hair.

“Haruchiyo Sanzu Im gonna fucking kill you! What the fuck did you do to my son!” you shriek pulling at the collar of his dress shirt.

“Baby, he was right next to me, I thought he fell asleep for something” he tries to explain. “Baby you're choking me, please let go”.

Letting go of his color you force him to explain to you why your boy was crying in the first place.

After sitting through half an hour listening to Haruchiyo telling you his side of the story you learned that despite you telling him not to he stuck his greedy hands in the bag of taiyaki. Hachiro saw what his father was doing and wanted some taiyaki for himself. Haruchiyo being a selfish shit didn’t give him any being wary of a snitch.

—— For the past hour and half you searched the entirety of Bontens headquarters with Sanzu, Ran, and Rindou but Hachiro was nowhere to be found and the office was in a worse condition from when you first stepped in.

At this point you were tearing up, your little two year old was missing in a building filled with dangerous men. Dangerous men who could easily hurt a little boy who knew how to throw a fit.

“I’m so sorry y/n, I’m so fucking dumb, I lost our son” Sanzu says pulling you into his chest, rubbing your back. You could tell he was genuinely worried and upset at himself but once the tears started you couldn’t stop them.

“We’re so sorry y/n, we’ll find him.” Ran says coming over to pat your head, trying to bring you any sort of comfort.

“Yeah, me and Ran will go look right now” Rindou says getting up from his place on a desk.

“Thanks guys”, you say, lifting your head up from Haru’s chest.

Silence fills the room as Sanzu continues to rub your back. Just before you are about to go look for Hachiro again, Mikey steps out of his office with Hachiro in his arms and Hachiro with taiyaki in his hands.

“Mommy” your little boy yells excitedly. Getting out Sanzu’s embrace you scoop him up from Mikey’s hands and pull him close.

“Hachiro, where were you? We were looking for you all over” you question the toddler.

“Daddy is poo poo, uncle Mikey, gimmie me fishy” he explains as he brings his fishy towards his mouth.

“Hachiro, we don’t call our elders names, your daddy was really worried about you”.

“Yeah I was,” Sanzu says, coming next to you to ruffle Hachiros hair.

“Thanks for taking care of him” you thank Mikey. God knows what would have happened if Hachiro got into the wrong hands.

“It’s alright, I'd rather have him than Sanzu, but thanks for the taiyaki it tastes great”.

“Hey, you don’t mean that, do you Mikey” your husband questions the higher up.

Yes, Sanzu was a dumbass who always seems to cause trouble for you, but he’s the love of your life. If anyone was a dumbass it was you.

[wri0thesley]

nat something about toji drives me absolutely feral, can i have a scenario or something where he meets reader at a bar and they have a steamy one night stand i don’t know i just want this beeg beefy dilf to absolutely ruin my puthy (fem reader please!)

anon, i really hope you have a corruption kink

Favourite (So Far) - Toji x Fem!Reader (5k)

Toji sees you sitting alone at a bar; all quiet and soft and unsure, and absolutely begging to be ruined - and he decides he can help with that.

warnings: afab reader, fem pronouns. not sfw, mentions of murder. corruption kink, virgin reader, dacryphilia, fingering, coming inside, dirty talk. 

Toji normally doesn’t bother lingering after he’s held up his end of the bargain, but the money is burning a hole in his pocket and the minute he’d left the body of the man he’d been hired to kill locked in the back office of the bar, he’d remembered you.

He estimates he’s got a good half an hour before anyone realises the man is dead. If they’d wanted him to clear up after himself, they should have written it in the contract – still, with how awkward you’d looked and how your eyes kept darting about the place, Toji is pretty sure he’ll have you away from the bar and with his arm around your waist in . . . ooh, ten minutes? Fifteen, at a push.

He knows your type.

You’re uncomfortable, watching your friends go off and flirt and dance – pulling at your skirt (you’re uncomfortable in that, too), tugging your thin shirt up to cover your chest, ordering something non-alcoholic and looking morosely at it. Your eyes avoiding when men try and catch your gaze, your posture tensing – he’s pretty certain that you do not want to be here, and Toji is going to offer you an alternative that he thinks you might prefer.

You don’t notice him until he’s right beside you (people never do), leaning in against your ear, one of his arms slapping on the bar beside you, caging you in on your barstool. You start, moving back, blinking your pretty eyes at him in clear surprise, your mouth a soft ‘o’ – ah. Toji can tell you’re the kind of girl who isn’t used to male attention, who doesn’t think that you’re anything special. Shy. Probably untouched-- he’s grinning at you, and he doesn’t miss the little swallow, the flash of interest in your eyes (girls like you always like the idea of getting involved in something a little dangerous)--

“Can I buy you a drink, sweetheart?”

The voice is rough and low and dark, startling you from your reverie. Your friends have all, indeed, long gone – after sighing at you that you’re no fun, that they shouldn’t have asked you to come out with them anyway – you’re surprised by the man it belongs to, all raven hair and piercing green eyes and a scar on his lip that your eyes can’t help but trace the line of – how does somebody end up with a scar like that?

“Oh,” you bluster, feeling embarrassed and unsure by the way he’s looking at you, the easy way he throws out the pet name, the casual authority he’s emanating by how you’ve been caged. “I’m-- I don’t really--”

He chuckles.

“Me neither,” he says. “Lemme get you somethin’ soft, then--”

It would be easier, he thinks, if you had agreed – if you’d been softened a little bit by the buzz of alcohol. Still, he knows that what he gives off is heady enough that you’ll come with him anyway – he doesn’t drink himself, so he’s not exactly going to blame you for wanting to keep your wits about you. Smart thing, for all of how vulnerable you look in a short skirt and high heels and a low-cut top. He’s ordered something for you before you can refute – you can’t deny to yourself that it’s nice. It’s nice to have someone be interested in you. It’s nice, too, that said someone is rugged and six foot something with corded veins and muscle in thick biceps and forearms.

You’re staring at him, and Toji allows it, letting his own gaze crawl across your pretty face, your body, the way the cheap lights of this dive are picking out the shine in your eyes and the gloss of your lipstick.

“What’s a cute little thing like you doin’ on her own somewhere like this?” He asks you, lifting the glass to his lips. You try not to stare at them, though your stomach is twisting. You shrug, awkwardly.

“I got dragged here by some friends,” you say, inclining your head towards the dance-floor, where your friends are very much living up to their earlier assertion that they were going to have a wild time and if you weren’t going to join in, then you could just wallow in your misery.

“Ah,” he raises his eyebrows, eyes briefly brushing over where you’d indicated before returning to you. Something about the way that those eyes are pinning you like a butterfly to a cork board makes you squirm, heat curling in your lower belly. Nobody has ever looked at you like that before. This man is staring at you like he wants to take you apart, and it’s exhilarating. “You not the dancin’ sort, huh?” Another swallow. The bob in his throat is mesmerising. “Can’t blame ya. Pretty thing like you’s probably inundated with attention the minute y’get out there--”

You laugh, softly, heat rising to your cheeks. Toji can’t help but think how cute that is – you’re so obviously unaware of yourself. When he gets you on your back, he knows you’ll have that certain kind of naivety that never fails to get him hard and aching in his pants; wide eyes and bitten lips and breath dying in your throat at the touch of his teeth and hands and cock.

“Nothing like that,” you say, “I just--”

Your eyes catch something. Toji looks too, as you’re interrupted by a pretty girl tottering up to you both in an even shorter skirt and even higher heels. Her eyes linger on Toji, a fraction too long, before she turns to you and pouts and says your name, making you wince. There’s a whining tone to her voice.

She’s complaining that someone’s spilt a drink over her, and Toji sees now that her expensive-looking shirt is stained dark brown. He hadn’t noticed the scent of beer wafting from her because of the overall air of the bar is absolutely saturated in it, but now that she’s right there . . . he wrinkles his nose.

“You have to come home with me, nobody else will,” she tugs on your arm. “And you said you weren’t having fun anyway, so you can always stay there, but I need to change out of this--”

There’s a world-weary quality in your eyes. Something that suggests to Toji that you’re used to being the designated person to take care of your friends, to dropping things to clean up after them – those big eyes and the downturn of your mouth and the softness of your voice all suggest to him that maybe part of the reason you’re so demure, so . . . innocent . . . is because you haven’t had a chance to explore anything else.

Toji drapes a thick arm around your shoulders. You jump at the contact – but almost as if it’s against your will, you nestle into him. Closer to him. A prey animal knows when it’s being protected, after all – even if it doesn’t know, yet, that he’s the predator.

“We’re a bit busy here,” he says, keeping his tone affable with a knife-sharp edge. The girl opens her mouth, as if she’s going to protest – but Toji grins, his eyes darkening, his mouth tilting to show just a little bit too much teeth. He lets himself draw himself up a little taller, so that his breadth and his height and the taut muscles beneath his tight shirt are unarguable. Your friend falters, shoots you a look, and then shrugs.

“F-fine,” she says, “I’ll go on my own--”

She walks away, pouting, storm clouds rising off of her. You’re trembling imperceptibly (adorable) – he thinks this might be the first time you’ve ignored one of your friends. Eager to please little thing, he supposes – the kind of person who wants to be liked and will do almost anything to keep it that way, with big doe eyes and a trembling lip and your chest thrust out unconsciously.

Oh, he will ruin you, and you’ll thank him for it afterwards.

“Sorry if I’m oversteppin’ my boundaries there,” he says to you, and you look at him with your eyes big and wide and wet your lips, his cock giving an answering throb. You breathe very softly;

“N-no, thank you, it’s . . . it’s nice to not have to deal with them, for once--”

Toji leans further into you, his arm not leaving your shoulders – close enough that his breath tickles the shell of your ear, and your brain short-circuits at a handsome older man leaning so close and intimately to you.

“You don’t wanna stay here, though, do ya?” His other hand is suddenly on your leg, calloused fingertips brushing the soft skin of your thigh. Your heart skips a beat, your body reacting – threads of heat sewing themselves into knots between your thighs. “You wanna split?”

His eyes do not stray to the clock behind the bar, but he estimates it’s been about eleven minutes. Longer than he was expecting, but – as you bite your lip and stand up, letting his fingertips drag dangerously close to the part of you between your legs, Toji decides it’s worth it.

His place is nothing special. For a man as well-paid as he is, you’d expect something a little classier, maybe – but for a man with the kind of profession Toji Fushiguro has, he doesn’t spend much time in it. He’s too busy travelling to care about it beyond anything other than a place to crash, eat, and bring home his conquests. And you don’t seem disgusted by it as he pushes you roughly into the room, arm locking around your waist, mouth dipping to taste you – so Toji doesn’t worry about it too much.

You’re still trembling against him, your entire body thrumming with energy that you’re not used to – but that all works to his advantage. It works to the advantage of directing you into his room, until your back hits the bed with a soft ‘whoomph’ of air and Toji is kneeling over you, your eyes big and wide and blown as they look up at him.

You’d been so easy to convince back here. You’d made a couple of quiet whispers about how you shouldn’t, the way that good girls like you do – but his fingers had cupped your cheek and his body had pressed against yours and he’d smiled that dangerous knife-edge smile and you’d been putty in his hands, trembling kneed and so very adaptable as you’d walked beside him with your breath unsteady in your chest at your own daring.

Now, though, with a man’s bed behind you and a man’s cock digging into your stomach where he has you caged underneath him, things are beginning to feel far more real. You take another shuddering breath, not meeting his eyes as you whisper;

“I—I haven’t--”

Oh, fuck. If you knew what those little words did to him – if you could have heard the monster roaring in his chest at how excited he was that he’d not only get to utterly ruin you, but to get to be the first one to do it . . . He’d let himself hope, based on your way of holding yourself all demure and prim, that you’d be a virgin, but to hear it from your own lips with your skin rapidly heating up under the confession.

“That’s alright, sweetheart,” Toji practically coos at you, as his big fingers go to your shirt, tugging it off with expert precision. “I ain’t gonna break you—”

(Well. Not in any way you aren’t going to beg for.)

Breath caught in your throat as your bra is unclipped, the lacy garment dropped onto the floor. His own shirt follows – you can barely stop yourself ogling him, the firm abdominal muscles, the scars across his pectorals. You can tell, based on how many scars he’s bearing, just how dangerous the man above you must be.

The one like a starburst is a bullet scar, you’re pretty sure. The one wrapping around his side is too big to be anything but a knife or a sword – this is a man involved in something dangerous, something shady – and even that isn’t enough to get you to ask him to stop.

Staring down at your newly exposed breasts, Toji can’t resist leaning in; sucking one of your nipples into his mouth, dragging his teeth across the sensitive bud, lapping at it until your back arches and you whimper so prettily that it goes straight through him and straight to his cock. The wet kisses trail back up to your neck, blunt teeth tugging at your skin, sucking quickly stinging bruise marks into the skin so that everybody will know what this cute little virgin was up to last night--

A rough tug to your earlobe makes you moan. A nip to your lower lip makes you practically mewl. And his rough fingertips pushing up your skirt to your waist, letting his fingers dig into your plush thighs so hard that there’s no way you won’t be marked with fingerprints tomorrow – that makes you whine.

“You like bein’ pushed around a little bit, cutie?” The pet name, again, has blood rushing to your face and heat rushing to between your legs. You’re suddenly so very aware of how slick you are, how your underwear is clinging to the folds of your sex. How much of that is his fingers and how much of it is his voice and how much of it is how exposed you are in front of him, you don’t know – but you bite your lip and avert your gaze, and this just seems to spur him on. Both of you know the answer: yes. Yes, you do like being pushed around a little bit--

“These are soaking wet,” he tells you, as the matching lacy underwear to your bra is peeled off of you. He readjusts himself, grabbing your thigh and pressing your knee against your chest so that he can move his hips between your two legs as well as get a proper look at what you’ve been hiding beneath the tiny skirt – he lets out a low whistle, those green eyes greedily drinking you in like you’re a painting hung in an art gallery. “Well, look at you. Ain’t you a sight for sore eyes?”

He sees how the compliment makes you squirm at the same time as it makes your cute little hole, exposed thanks to the stretch of your leg, flutter around nothing. He might break you if he doesn’t prepare you properly; you’re so small, and it’s been a real long time since he bedded a virgin--

One of his fingers drags through your slick with no preamble, brushing your fluttering hole, and the noise catches in your throat – halfway between a whimper and a soft sigh, a noise that does not serve to do anything but make him repeat the motion, gathering your glimmering arousal on the same thick digit. He brings it to his mouth, tongue darting out to taste you.

“Mm, you should taste yourself,” he says to you, eyes glinting. “You’re like honey, sweetheart--” Toji doesn’t wait for you to say yes or no. His finger pushes past your lips, so you’re forced to taste yourself on his fingertips, brushing over your tongue. His eyes focus very deeply on you, like you’re the only thing in his orbit worth paying attention to. “Why don’t you give my finger a suck, darlin’? You’ll want it as wet as you can get it--”

Not that you’re not plenty wet enough. But there’s something so endearing about the feel of your tongue hesitantly licking at him, the shine of your eyes. If he wasn’t hard enough to cut diamonds, he would have you suck his cock first, if only to see those pretty lips wrapped around his shaft and to hear you choke a little bit, to see your makeup go runny and messy and ruined--

“Atta girl,” he says, roughly, pulling his finger out (the trail of drool sends another of those throbs of heat through him). The finger drags over your slit again, parting the plump lips – and then, he’s pushing his finger inside you, your walls pulsing around him. You’re so fucking tight. He knows you weren’t lying about being a virgin – the gasp that dies in your throat, the hand that tangles in his bedsheets, the little lift of your hips to help him along – all of those are things that are entirely sensation responses, not in the least calculated, and Toji loves that.

The finger pumps in and out of you, helped along by your slick, until he can press another alongside it and scissor them gently, stretching out your channel in preparation for what you’re going to take in a matter of minutes. Your teeth keep digging into your bottom lip, as if you’re afraid to make too much of a noise – he chuckles as he brushes your swollen clit with his thumb.

“C’mon,” he growls, “don’t hold out on me. Lemme hear you--”

Oh, you’re so embarrassed – but you’re also, he can tell, the kind of girl who can’t resist an order. You let your mouth relax, drop open – and next time his thumb rubs firmly across your clit, the noise is caught only by the ceiling above you both. He makes some little noise of praise that you can’t fully discern, because now he’s started pulling forth your pleasure he doesn’t want to stop. Three fingers. His thumb, toying with your clit, rubbing firm circles with it as he feels your channel clench and quiver around his fingers. He rubs at the textured spot on your inner walls and you groan, your other hand gripping his forearm, your brow forming sweat. Your hips are circling, needy, in search of more stimulation.

“You gonna come for me, sweetheart?” Toji asks you, his voice like cigarettes and leather. “C’mon. Let me see-- let me feel your pretty cunt clench--”

Something about the dirty words pushes you over the edge and you tumble down a dark hole, fireworks exploding inside of you, stars bursting into being behind your eyelids as pleasure washes over you in great waves. You soak Toji’s fingers, your walls sucking him in deeper and deeper.

Your breath comes in great pants, the aftershocks of your orgasm still gently rippling through you even as Toji pulls his fingers out of you. You look up at the man as he adjusts himself with his other hand, as if in a haze – and as if in a haze, when he roughly pushes those three fingers back into your mouth, you suckle on them with your mind and thoughts all misty. All you can think about is him. That’s what he wanted, anyway – cute little demure virgin, cock drunk even without him fucking you properly – he breaks girls like you on the regular, but you might be one of his favourites.

He tugs down his pants enough to reveal his flushed cock, curving to lay against his stomach, hard and leaking precome from a reddened tip. Your eyes widen (he always loves that moment), as you realise why he took pains to prepare you with his fingers.

“Whaddya think?” He asks you, teasing, wrapping his fist around the shaft. Even his big hands around it do nothing to make it look smaller, and you barely realise that you’re staring until he slaps your thighs with it, streaking his own wetness all over you. “You’ll give a man a complex, sweetheart--”

“I-I don’t have much to compare it to,” you say, desperately, heated and needy even though you literally just came. You want him inside you. You never thought you’d be so easily broken down into wanting to be fucked, but here you are – something primal inside of you is awoken by the size of his cock and the glitter in his eyes and the sculpted muscle, and you want to be desecrated. “Y-you look big--”

He laughs at that. Yeah, you definitely don’t have much to compare it to if that’s your take-away. Still. It’s cute, how you’ve spread your legs a little wider, how you’re not hiding the fact you’re looking at him like he’s some kind of angel who’s finally granted you a taste of the celestial city.

“I feel big too,” he tells you, with a smirk that rattles you to your core. “Wanna find out?”

When you nod, he grins – those big hands take a hold of your thighs, pressing both of your knees to your chest this time. He takes a moment to enjoy you in this position – those wide eyes, the lewd splay of your legs revealing the glimpse of your cunt still tantalisingly shining with the remnants of your orgasm. You squirm under his hungry gaze, exposed – and that does nothing to quell the hunger that seems to be thrumming through Toji, with every clench and wriggle.

“Good,” he tells you, rubbing his cock through the mess you’ve made of yourself, making sure the head nudges your clit and he can see the way you shiver. “You’re bein’ such a good girl for me--”

He catches on your entrance and you let out a keen. With your knees pressed to your chest, you’re unable to get a grip on Toji’s shoulders, and you have to console yourself with fisting the bedsheets beneath you (rumpled even before you’d ended up there).

The position he’s got you in means that you feel every ridge of his cock, every vein, every throb – inch by inch, as he sheaths himself slowly inside you. He can’t help but watch as your jaw goes slack, as your eyes cloud with the feeling of him entering you – as tears bead in the corner of your eyes at the burn and stretch--

Oh, fuck, the tears. He wonders if you feel the way that his cock seems to harden at that, at how pretty you look all glassy-eyed and helpless and trying to take him. He’s maybe two thirds in and almost at the limit of forward motion, but you whimper, letting your head fall back--

“P-please,” you say, “I—I can take it--”

He laughs, low and dangerous. He leans in, brushes his lips over your sweat slicked forehead. His tone is syrupy sweet when he speaks, as he angles his hips just so that he sinks another aching inch into the sweet kiss of your tight cunt.

“Oh, I know you will, sweetheart,” he murmurs, sounding almost like a threat. His eyes flash downwards, to see how tightly you’re clinging to him – how big his cock looks, disappearing into your slick sex. How the glistening ring of your need coats him. Just a bit further – watching himself claim you is almost hypnotic.

He wants to see you on your hands and knees, watch his cock stretch you out that way. He wants to see you gag and choke and drool around his cock, wants to see your small hands wrap around him, wants to have you in every position until you’re so fucked silly you can barely move--

But for now, he hilts inside of you, his balls slapping against your slick skin. His face splits into a smile as his eyes travel back up, to the bulge in your stomach that he knows is from just how big his cock is, to your thighs trembling even with him keeping them prone against you. You’re so cute. The tears have spilled past the rim of your eyelids now, wetting your cheeks – they’re so maddeningly sexy, on your pretty face. He’s not going to last half as long as he wants to, he doesn’t think – not when you’ve been driving him to distraction since the moment he laid eyes on you.

He can barely remember he killed a man less than an hour ago.

That’s old news, unimportant compared to how your walls flutter around him as he pulls out. Unimportant compared to the arch of your back, the rock of your breasts, the great gasps of air.

He’s not a kind man, but he doesn’t go out of his way to be an asshole to his conquests – so he lets you get used to the rolling rhythm of his hips, slowly. He doesn’t piston his hips in and out of you, not at first. He lets the slow drag of his cock on your sensitive inner walls make you shiver, make you gasp and moan and whimper. And only after he’s earned the light hump of your hips against his, searching for the sensation yourself, does he let himself fuck you the way he wants to.

He wants to record the moan-squeak-whimper of surprise as he begins to pump his hips in earnest. It’s a noise he’s heard before, but coming from your pretty mouth it seems all the more potent. His hips jerk into you and out of you, the noise of skin slapping against skin very loud in the bedroom. The slick noises of his cock driving in and out of your tight cunt would be shaming if it didn’t feel so good, if you didn’t get a shock of want every time his body ground against your clit on the inner thrust.

You lose track of time, with the dangerous man you met at the bar bent over you. He mouths greedily at your lips, seeming to treasure every noise you make and swallow it down his throat like a sweet candy – he bites at your neck, at your throat, the grip on your thighs never faltering for a moment. You can do nothing but let yourself be folded in half, and let him fuck you like an animal.

That seems right. He’s rutting into you deep and hungrily, almost feral in his enjoyment of your body. He drops one of your legs suddenly, letting it hit the mattress, readjusting his hips so that one of his hands can dive between you and--

He’s playing with your clit again. The pads of his fingers are rough, and you wonder if he handles a gun like the one that gave him that starburst scar. You wonder how dangerous these fingers are, the ones that were buried inside you and are now coaxing your poor, swollen clit to another orgasm.

“Come on, baby girl,” he growls, pressing harder, making your thighs jump with tension. “Wanna feel you come with my cock buried in that pretty little cunt--”

You whimper, throwing your head to the side and letting a cry out into the pillow like a mewl. Toji would be mad that you’d stifled the cute little noise, if the sight of you submissively showing him your neck (one of your softest parts) hadn’t scratched an itch for dominance inside of him – and if the feel of your body clenching and pulsating around his cock wasn’t currently finally pushing him over the edge, making him judder his hips against you as he shoots rope after rope of his come directly inside of you.

Your shoulders are heaving with the effort of the orgasm that’s still ricocheting through you, your toes curling, your body clenching and soaking Toji’s cock with your orgasm. You don’t even realise he’s come inside of you until he pulls out slightly and you wince at the feel of that same come, his load far too thick and full to not have a bit of it trickling out of your stretched hole. Toji admires the look of it; darkened from his persistent thrusts, your syrupy slick mixing with the thick pearly white of his seed.

“Y-you came inside me,” you say, your voice half-clogged with the tears that are still glistening on your cheeks (a low pulse of heat in his groin. His refractory period has always been short – and with a cute little thing like you in his bed, who can blame him for wanting to fuck you again almost immediately?). “I—I don’t even know your name--”

Oh, shit. He’d quite forgotten. He knows yours from the girl in the bar (that already feels like a lifetime ago). He can hear the uncertainty in your voice, the kind of confusion that seems to say ‘good girls don’t do this, I would never do this, who is this stranger wearing my skin with a man’s come making their thighs sticky?’. It’s part of the process of breaking that Toji loves so much.)

“Sure did, darlin’,” he says, absent-mindedly scooping some of the come that’s oozed out of you and pressing it back inside. He wins a whimper for that, one that’s definitely not ‘stop’. “You’re still so sensitive.”

If you notice he doesn’t give you his name in response to your question, you don’t say anything. As his fingers gently circle your entrance again, as his hand brushes your thigh and you shiver, he sees that you unconsciously spread your legs even further apart for his explorations. Oh, you’re so cute.

One lone finger, gently grazing your clit, makes your hips jerk, your voice break in a way that’s all needy. You look at Toji through those tear-darkened eyes, your lips bitten to puffiness, your lipstick and mascara and eyeliner all messed up on your face from crying and biting your lip and drooling. Adorable. Girls like you always look best like this, their polish scuffed when Toji’s taken them to bed and stripped away all of their defences.

Girls like you, Toji always manages to get to move their hips against his ministrations. He always manages to have them gasp, whimper, break--

You’re not the first one in his bed, and you probably won’t be the last. But as he grins at you and asks;

“Well, sweetheart. I’ll give you a choice. Y’wanna take a shower and I’ll call you a cab or somethin’ and you can head off home? Or,” he drops his voice low, drags his eyes over your prone form, brushes his lips over your stomach. They flutter against the soft skin, his breath a hot wash that makes goose flesh prickle all over you. “Y’wanna spend the night?”

And you bite your lip before nodding, nervously running your hand through his hair, your body near trembling with need--

Well. As he asks that and you answer, he really does think you might be his favourite one ever.

[starglow-xx]

hello! may i request headcanons for chuuya having a crush on someone who's dense? like he could ask them out in the most straightforward way possible and it would still go over their head?

yes, yes of course you may!

sorry this took so long! my computer was out of commission for abt a week (or two..??)

but this is also my birthday writing piece for chuuya!! (4/29/21) i even added a small drabble thingy in addition to the hcs for the occasion hehe

from where i am, it is about fifteen minutes past midnight so it’s officially chuuya day here!!

happy birthday chuuya i love you! you deserve the whole world and everyone is willing to fight tooth and nail to ensure your happiness! we love you! 💗💗

anyways, i hope you all enjoy this! i kinda had some writer’s block but it was still a lot of fun to write! there might be some mistakes, but i’ll scan over it again later. reader is gender neutral! have fun!

chuuya having a crush on a dense! reader

nakahara chuuya x gn! reader

im cackling somebody help him

he’s frustrated bc you can’t take a hint or a thousand but he can’t even be mad bc he’s whipped

“look at you all dressed up today, wanna go out later? my treat?”

“oh really? thanks chuuya-san! you’re such a nice friend. i’ll go invite the others right now, i’ll see you later!”

“...”

fast forward to later in the evening and he finds himself at a little restaurant with the black lizard + higuchi and akutagawa

sigh

in unison all of them go, “thank you for the meal chuuya-san!” (except aku and hirotsu are quieter & and gin just a nods hehe)

“no problem” (ꐦ ´͈ ᗨ `͈ )

gin only pats him on the back in sympathy

he spends a lot of time trying to think of ways to make it absolutely and undeniably clear that he has feelings for you

he always fails

“(y/n) i like you”

“i like you too chuuya-san”

“really?”

“mhm”

“t-then will you—”

“you’re a really great friend! and superior too”

“...nevermind”

“oh were you saying something?”

“nah, just forget about it”

tachihara is laughing in the corner of the corridor

dont worry, chuuya made sure to get back at him

chuuya’s been pinning after you for years and frankly, his failed attempts to woo you has lead everyone to the breaking point

and i mean everyone

yes, even aku

hell even dazai

but dazai also thinks it’s funny, so he doesn’t mind all that much

okay bye bye dazai-san this headcanon set isn’t abt you rn

PLEASE EVERYONE FEELS SO BAD FOR HIM

they knew even if he kissed you, you still might not get it

so they decided to help him

super secret mission get chuuya and (y/n) together is a go!

they’re still working on a proper mission name, don’t mind them

they had a super secret strategy meeting!

you can bet your ass that they nearly got nothing done

akutagawa & kaiji weren’t much help, neither was higuchi, mori, or elise

tachihara nearly got killed for a thoughtless comment

“just tell them chuuya-san!”

“i already fucking did you ass!”

gin, hirotsu, and kouyou were the most helpful !!

hirotsu and kouyou both agreed on the idea that chuuya should try courting with bouquets of flowers instead of flat out asking you bc they knew you found them pretty

(even if you don’t identify as a female, flowers are for everyone no matter gender or sexuality! so let’s normalize giving flowers to everyone <33 )

gin didn’t speak but she used cards to communicate

everyone knew that you weren’t stupid (you wouldn’t have survived in the mafia if you were) but they did know that you were only stupid when it came to all this lovey dovey stuff

i mean, if chuuya gave you flowers every so often, there’s no way that you wouldn’t piece it together at some point

right...??

but kouyou assured him that even though you wouldn’t get it right away, you’d appreciate the gestures and that he’ll stand out more

she even said that if someone gave her flowers, she would appreciate it, whether or not she reciprocated their feelings

it takes guts to be so up front with your feelings after all

gin and hirotsu only nodded with her explanation

once again, this only provoked a reaction out of tachihara

“what do you know gin? i get the old man and kouyou-san, they’re grown, but you? what do you know abt courting? or flowers? what are you a girl?”

akutagawa choked on his cough, higuchi on air, and on the other side of yokohoma at the ada, dazai is cackling

yes, dazai somehow placed a listening device onto chuuya’s hat and was listening in

don’t ask how, it’s dazai

“DAZAI GET YOUR BANDAGED ASS OFF THE COUCH AND STOP LAUGHING”

anyways

the next day, chuuya did what was barely discussed and for once, things actually started to look up

until they started look to down again

at first, it actually looked like you understood his intentions after he gave you a bouquet of flowers

literally everyone was leaning against the opposite hallway you two were in and then they got excited !!

especially chuuya !

but then your expression sort of changed...??

and then in their heads they simultaneously went, “oh no”

they knew that expression

it was very familiar when you tended to friend zone chuuya

but boy let me tell you what you said next made them facepalm and or make their jaws drop

“ah, so you really are friend zoning me huh chuuya-san; what a shame, i really did like you”

LEMME TELL YOU WHEN I SAY THAT CHUUYA WAS DISTRESSED I MEAN HE WAS DISTRESSED

you liked him??

him of all people??

he wasn’t complaining, no of course not, but he still couldn’t believe it

but that wasn’t what he was really focusing on right now

what in any form or language did it say he was friend zoning you?!

flower language apparently

chuuya chose to buy the bouquet of yellow roses, pink carnations, and yellow carnations bc he thought you would appreciate the brighter colors, and so that you’d remember them better (because remembering them, meant remembering him)

but ooh boy

altogether, they meant the exact opposite message he wanted to send

someone help him pls

“you see chuuya-san, yellow roses mean friendship, pink carnations mean gratitude, and yellow carnations mean rejection; sooo in a nutshell, these pretty much say ‘thank you for being my friend, but im rejecting you”

no one can tell if tachihara is crying or wheezing

and dazai is having the time of his life

yes, he started listening in on him again

and chuuya is just stunned

like speechless and unmoving stunned

is he just bad at this whole courting/dating thing?? it’s only been one day and of it and somehow he was the one doing the rejecting??

“thank you for the flowers chuuya-san, i’ll be going now; i’ll make sure to let this affect our friendship. i’ll see you tomorrow!”

you passed by the not so subtle group of people

“tachihara-kun..?? are you alright?”

just for context, he was leaning his forehead against the wall using his forearm

again, it was hard to tell whether he was crying or wheezing

“i-im okay (y/n)-san...i think c-chuuya-san has it worse than me”

“...okay..?”

BACK TO CHUUYA

he’s still frozen poor baby

but it’s okay bc after like 5 more seconds he’s chasing you down the hallway you were walking in

kouyou, with a knowing smile on her face, ushers everyone away towards the opposite direction

she received some whines (ahem, tachihara and mori) but silenced them by summoning golden demon

but it’s okay

if they run fast enough, they can see what happens through the security cameras

chuuya caught up with you and tried to explain everything but he was exhausted

emotionally, physically (bc since when did you walk that fast??), and generally just tired with the whole situation

he just wanted to call you his; was that too much to ask??

as explosive as he can be, he can be calm and collected too

and he really did try to be that way as he talked with you but it was very difficult at the moment

the dumbfounded and confused look on your face his face twitch with annoyance and his heart started beating faster bc god you were cute

BUT THATS BESIDES THE POINT RIGHT NOW

thank goodness after what seemed like years, you finally somewhat understood what happened

you didn’t understand completely but it was something

The two of you stood in the middle of the unusually empty hallway facing each other, you with the bouquet still in hand. It was quiet as you and Chuuya assessed the situation.

You looked at him skeptically and he stared right back you with his gorgeous blue eyes.

“...So you do like me Chuuya-san??”

“Yes”

“And you were trying to court me just now, not friend zone me??”

“Yes”

You got most of your questions out of the way, but there was something that you’ve been wondering about for quite a while.

“...So you’re not gay for Dazai-san??”

“Yes, im not wait—GAY FOR DAZAI?? THAT MACKEREL??”

Chuuya did a double take. What in heavens name made it seem like he liked that suicidal maniac?? Why would he choose him if he had you?

Like he would choose him anyways; or ever consider him as a possible romantic partner.

“Oh, so you are?”

“NO! I SAID I LIKED YOU DIDN’T I?”

“Well yeah, but I thought you liked Dazai-san too. As annoying as he is, he can be quite charming—”

He was out of patience at this point (nope definitely not because you were talking about Dazai who told you that?) and just decided to kiss you.

You immediately melted into the kiss and kissed him back with the same amount of love and feeling.

Letting the bouquet fall to the ground, you wrapped you arms around his neck and his put his on your lower back and brought you closer to him. After a few more moments, the two of you broke apart for air.

The two of you, slightly out of breath, leaned your foreheads against each other and just basked in each others presence.

Chuuya looked into your (e/c) eyes and asked you just a little bit above a whisper, “Now do you get my intentions and feeling?”

You blinked at him before breaking out into a grin, “Hmm I’m not sure; do you wanna do that again Chuuya?”

The red head only blinked back at you before rolling his eyes, a smile present on his handsome features, his heart fluttering at you using his name with the honorific.

“Dumbass”

Smiling cheekily at him, you pressed a kiss on his cheek and started dragging him towards the lobby to take a walk around the building perimeter, knowing that the two of you can’t be too far from work.

The way down to the lobby was mostly in comfortable silence until you said something that made Chuuya want to bash his head against the wall.

“You know, you could’ve just told me you liked me Chuuya. It’s not like I would’ve said no.”

Once again, as the rest of the more power mafia members watch from security cameras, it is hard to tell whether Tachihara is crying or wheezing of laughter.

omake !!

The two of you just started making your way around the building when suddenly a very familiar voice came from Chuuya’s prized hat.

“Chuuyaaaa!! It was about time you stopped being a chicken, Chibi!”

Removing his hat from his head, he started yelling at it not knowing exactly where the listening device was planted.

“TEME! HOW DID YOU—”

“And (y/n)! I would congratulate you, but I think I would rather offer you my condolences. Why him?! He’s just a slimy slug. OOH OOH how would you like to join me in a double suicide?! A shame it won’t be a lover’s suicide but it’ll annoy Chuuya so I think it’ll be worth it! ”

“YOU—”

“And please don’t kiss while I’m listening in. You made me lose my appetite! And it was such a shame! I was eating crab using Kunikida-kun’s money! Do you know what you’ve cost me?!”

“DAZAI YOU PIECE OF—”

“Ah! Kunikida-kun is here! I have to go!”

You can hear something is the background that vaguely sounds like, “DAZAI YOU WASTE OF BANDAGES STOP USING MY MONEY”

“DAZAI DON’T YOU DARE LEAVE IM NOT DONE WITH—”

*Click!*

The click sound from the hat revealed that Dazai disconnected.

Chuuya twitched and glared furiously at his signature hat hating that the voice he hated the most came out of it.

“Aww, I didn’t get to talk to Dazai-san”

Chuuya whipped his head towards you, a look of mock (or real) betrayal showing on his features.

You laughed at him before taking the hat out of his hands and placing it on his head.

He shyly looked away before muttering a thanks making you smile wider. Just as the two of you were about to start walking, a small explosion erupted from his hat; it was likely that Dazai made the listening device self destruct.

“DAZAI YOU BASTARDD”

At the Armed Detective Agency, a certain suicidal maniac hid from the wrath of his current partner as he thought about the wrath his old one.

“Hmmm I wonder if Chuuya would finally stop wearing his ugly hats if I blow all of them up...”

as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize! the reblog button is there for a reason

[theficplug]

Taking Erik To The Beauty Supply Store 2 / Barber Shop With Erik

Erik Killmonger x Black Reader

Warnings : mature/sexual conversations?

it's a regular day in the stevens household. going to the beauty supply store again & the barber shop but hey it's fun cause it's you and your man.

First taking Erik to the beauty supply store fic:

“I could beat the brake off her lying ass. First of all, I should’ve known something was up cause she asked me if I’m natural. I said yes. She said well I normally do relaxed hair.. Then said you got to have your hair washed and blow dried already… Talking about she was going to have me serving 90s Nia Long. This bitch got me looking like big momma when she came home for that motherfucking party.” You continue your rant as Erik moves around the room looking for your body butter and your fluffy shoes to put on for the day.

You wanted a cute 90s pixie cut to go along with the theme of the maternity shoot which was like the cheesy 90s mall style set with the faded backdrop.

180 dollars and a lopsided , almost a golden bob later and you are still thinking about snatching her out of that salon.

“I’m gonna try and trim it up myself and dye it before the maternity photos tomorrow. But I’mma get two wigs just in case I mess up.” You explain to Erik as he begins to spread the body butter up your legs leaving a golden glow on your skin.

“Not you down there cackling after getting some hang time on the locs you been growing since high school... It’s quiet, ain't no back talk.” You banter with him and he stops massaging your legs to give you a look and laughs softly before giving you a retort of his own.

“You got a lot to say for somebody that can’t even lotion they ashy lil knees.”

“Your daughter been pushing against my organs for 8 and a half months. I don’t wanna hear nothing unless its about my push present. You know that I like rings… My engagement ring looking reeeealll lonely.” you say to him as you dangle your hand in front of his face.

“You look so fucking good today baby… Say, Big Fine, lemme get your number… I’mma eat the f-” he trails off kissing your legs and letting his tongue trail up it and you grab his chin softly.

“Boy if you don’t come on before you be late for your appointment… Can I stop and get a blue raspberry slushie first though?” you ask him and he sighs softly before giving you a small smile and nodding.

“Yeah, hold on let me grab your shoes and purse and then we can go.”

“And obviously yes when we come back before I install that lace front you can beat, duh.” you reply to him before giving him a peck to his lips.

After he grabs everything and helps you down the stairs. And with his help of putting you into his big ass truck you two are on your way.

“We’re going to get my hair cut first cause I already know you’re going to want to go to 2 different stores and it’s only gon’ take him about 15 minutes at the most to line me up.”

He wasn’t lying with the way that you liked to scan every section of the store before you left because to be honest where else were you going to get a pair of skittle shorts, bomb ass lip glosses, and a cute little panda hand sanitizer holder all in one place?

“Okay, sounds like a plan.. The way that I was supposed to have a hot girl summer this year and ended up with a damn its too hot for me to even put my clothes on mom summer. You really were not playing about trying to start a family on your birthday.” you joke as you crunch on your goldfish and look over at Erik.

“I think you just got finer through this whole thing. Watching my baby grow my baby is something surreal. In the beginning watching you go through all of the morning sickness and the body aches and stuff. I felt so bad you know not being able to physically take on all that was going on with you. I aint gon’ never not be appreciative and awe of you.” Erik replies with a serious comment that you were not expecting and you’d be damned if the hormones aren’t doing their thing.

“I really did not expect you to say that. Baabbbee, come on. You know I cry about everything right now. Love you.” you lean over to wrap your arms around him gently and kiss the side of his face while he’s focusing on the road.

“I love you too…. I think I’mma get my locs cut off soon. I don’t know why I’m ready to get a fade and just call it a day.” he questions before looking over at you briefly

“Either way you still gonna look good. I knew you before you even got your locs so you’re gonna look even better now because you grew into your head. Dee be cutting the fuck outta your hair even though he been bald for a good 40 years.” you say and it causes Erik to let out a loud laugh and shake his head.

You eventually ended up ordering a blue raspberry lemonade slushie, a hotdog and fries because Sonic basically took all of Erik's money at this point in your pregnancy.

The rest of your ride was chill as you both swayed to the music or turned it down for a little chat every now and then.

In public was always very protective of you but especially since becoming pregnant he has been hovering over you like a lion waiting for someone to even look at you for too long.

He hops out of the sleek matte black truck first to help you out and sling his arm around your waist with a hand resting on your belly.

You feel some eyes on you as you walk through the door. Your multi-coloured sundress that showcased your back, flowing with you.

Some of the men, new to the shop you assumed, were eyeing you down before Erik looked over their way and nods at them and they pretended to check their phones.

“What's up E? Damn lil sis look like she’s about to pop! How you feeling baby girl?” Dee greets you and Erik as you both walk in and some of the regulars in there say hey to the both of you.

“I’m alright Dee. Baby is just really ready to see the world. She has been kicking up a storm at times. I think we might have a little athlete here.” you reply and you watch as the greyed man with freckles across his cheeks and bridge of his nose eyes crinkle as he finishes cutting the man's hair sitting in the chair.

“I remember when I became a father for the first time. Shits wild because you think that you know everything there is to know and then when you actually see your baby take that first breath. It’s like nothing you’ve ever experienced before.” He continues as he shows you a photo of his 4 children and you give him a small smile.

“Ooh, they’re beautiful.” you compliment him as you settle into your seat and scroll on your phone on your phone waiting for Erik to be next.

Some time went by and the men seemed like they were trying to keep their conversation in a hush and you can see some eyes on you as they talked back and forth.

“I’m just saying if you want a threesome with your girl and you expect her to be okay with letting another woman into her bed. You need to match her energy. Could you imagine your girl asking you to bring a whole nother man into your room if that’s not what you’re into? Instead of asking for it. Maybe try bringing toys into the situation. Could spice it up a notch and be in both of your comfort zones. Personally, couples vibrators seem to do the trick just fine.” You advise as you look up from scrolling on your Pinterest feed.

The little huddle of them in front of you stopped talking and immediately looked up at you in silence before Dee’s laugh broke it.

“I don’t know about bringing another man in. That ain't my thing but I get what you're saying. Which ones would you recommend?” The one named Leron asked and you notice Erik is now paying attention , looking from you to them to make sure they stay respectful.

“You better let them know , baby girl! That’s how that baby popped into fruition. She got you with the tantric breathing, huh E?” he jokes and Erik cracks into a smile, his golds gleaming as he looks at you.

“She not wrong. Engage in what your woman like too. Yoga, talking during sex, giving as much as you receive from her, all that. ” He says casually and shrugging and you give him a small smile cause this man done come so far from when you met him.

After he finishes lining up his beard, Erik pays and you’re on your way to one of your favourite places.

“You look so sexy. Your beard is all lined up crisp and stuff. I told you that beard oil was gonna even it out.” you say to him and kiss him below his ear . His hand gripped your thigh gently and you repeated it again.

It didn’t take long before you were at one of your favourite places.

You turned to Erik and asked him to buy a stocking cap for you to try on the wigs that you liked and wanted to see before you purchased it.

You slid on the stocking cap over your hair before grabbing a cute little 27 piece pixie cut wig just to try it on and see what it was giving . You finger combed it and turned to Erik to ask him how it looks.

“Like you finna start singing “Truth is i’m tired. Take me to the king. Here’s my offering-” .” You hold in your laugh as you push Erik’s chest and he grabs your hands.

“I can’t stand your ass !” You say cracking up and Erik grabs the stocking cap from his pocket that he brought himself and slides it over his locs.

You watch as he grabs one of the bobs from the mannequin and sits it half cocked on his head before shaking it side to side.

“What’s cooler than being cool? Ice cold. You know what to do doooo. You know what to doooo.... This is your grand daddy. This is your grand daddy.” Erik starts acting like Andre 3000 and Mr. Brown. You swear this man was gonna make you push out this baby with how hard you were laughing at him.

“Why are you moving your lips like thaaat? What’s your name? B.O.B, so they calling you Bob? Stop playing nigga you know that I’m known for the bob.” you sing the nicki minaj lyrics to him and both of y’all get a good laugh before he takes off the wig and places it carefully back on the mannequin.

He looks over at the one that looked the most like your hair before you got it cut and slides it on.

His expressions changed and he narrowed his eyes at you before putting his hand on his stomach.

“Whew, my god E. You did this to me and for what? My ankles looking like cornbread huh? Look at this shit bae! If my nose swells for real in these next months, we fighting. Damn, I’m getting thick. I look like I'm pregnant in the front and the back. Can you get me two shrimp po’boys and some fries on the way home? ERIK, wake up- You our baby look like Stitch in this ultrasound? Stop playing , im for real.” he sounds exactly like you and mimicked your expressions to a t.

You giggled softly and snatched his wig off leaving him standing there looking crazy in the cap.

“You wanna fight?” You ask him before walking up on him like you’re on bad girls club and swinging the wig at him.

He helped you put the wig back on the mannequin and kissed both of your hands before continuing through the aisle with you.

You both ignored how many times the employee passed by or watched you as you grabbed some of the products from the shelf and put it into your little cart that you wanted to try.

“You wish this was you, huh? You wanted to be Future from 8 Mile so bad, huh? ” you ask Erik , laughing as you point to the full lace faux locs wig that’s in front of you and he shakes his head.

“She got you down bad. This you?” he asks you as he points to the lil gold church wig that’s sitting on the top shelf and you suck your teeth at him .

“You wanna dip dye your hair for tomorrow? A pretty auburn colour would look so good on you or even a baby blue?” You ask him as you move away from the wigs after deciding to put a off black lace front straight wig in your cart and another in sandy blonde with deep waves.

You scan the shelf of dye as Erik wraps his arm around your waist and takes a look.

“This one looks good right here.” He adds as he hands you a colour called Electric Blue.

“This is gonna look so good on you bae.” You compliment him and he leans down to kiss you softly.

“You only tryna compliment me cause you want me to help you install that wig. You think you slick bae.” he calls as he walks off towards the hair care products for his locs.

“Well, if I’m finna use the little energy I have to retwist your hair you could at least extend the helping hand!” You call after him.

“I haven’t tried peppermint oil yet but it should be good to add to my mix? Look, I found this small ass bonnet. She’s gonna be able to match us.” He says walking back to you and showing you the lilac bonnet in his hand and you swear you were about to tear up again cause all 3 of you were gonna have matching bonnets and durag.

“If she takes after both of us she’s gonna have a head full of hair. To cover that melon from your side.” You tease him

“Come on and grab your butterfly wings for your eyes so we can go home and finish our show. I’mma cook them snow crabs for you too.” he says to you and you can see him watching you like you hung the moon in the sky yourself as you venture off.

You grabbed the edge control, lashes, a new lipstick, earrings, glosses, Got2b spray, and some accessories for Erik’s hair before meeting him at the counter.

It took him all of two seconds to pay for your beauty supply store addiction and you were off on your way back to the crib to love on him.

Erik was currently standing behind you while you sat in the chair in his old large tshirt and held down the wig to the Ghost Bond glue.

You were talking him through helping you finish the install because you just didn't have the energy to do it.

“Okay you gon’ take a lil piece and wrap it around the wand. But please be careful baby. This one goes from like 0 to a 400 degrees so fast.” you warn and watch in the mirror as he takes the first piece and follows your instructions.

You watch him for a while focusing on your head and asking if you liked the way that it’s turning out. You smile softly at him and nod.

“I'm so grateful , you know. “ you say to him with a pout

“Damn, I was just about to send you a do you like me back yes or no text after this too.” he jokes and you shake your head.

“I’m tryna be serious and appreciate you-” you are cut off by him leaning down and pushing his plump lips out for a kiss from you

“I love you too. 2 more weeks and I get to have my two babies in my arms. What more could I want? ”

Tag list: @doublesidedscoobysnacks

@chaneajoyyy

@mirandkimy

@doitforthevine67

@dasia21

@depressionandfandomsinc

@wholelotta-melanin

@theesotericqueen

@mbakuwife

@spookys-girl

@teardropzih

@bigchoose

@ceo-of-baby

@sweetpeachjones

@lost-ssoull

@shyblackgurl

@nijajoha

@imayhavemisunderstood

(Long post. Sorry I'm still learning how to do the read more thing! Sorry for being gone from here for so long. This one really helped me ease back into writing especially after how much love the first one received!)

[tryingmydarndest]

Thank You (Luka Couffaine x Reader)

Summary (Part 1/probably 3): The author goes on a bit of a tangent about how Y/N goes on a bit of a tangent about Viperion. Who may just have a little, big ol' crush on them?

Tags: -not enough actual relationship -fluff -but like, a weird sprinkling of angst that I didn't plan on right at the end???

Word count: 1.6k

A/N: Inspired by this fic by @seriously-sirius-black <3. Luka? OOC? Idk, probably, I don’t write fanfic. But I am actually kinda proud of how well Alya turned out. Writing this made me realize how much of a mom friend I apparently headcanon her as. I wrote this gender-and-as-everything-else-neutral as I can make it (lemme know if you see ways I can improve, tho idk how much more fanfic I'll even be writing). Also, I freakin' RAMBLE and overuse italics, but ya get what ya get and ya don't gotta fret. Ooh, important note for future parts (if i write them) - this is a kinda!au where the miraculous users keep their miraculous. also if I had a nickel for every time I get awkwardly specific about the placement of both of a character’s hands I’d have TWO nickels. Happy reading!! <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

Part I - Paris's Cutiest Heroes

The look currently on Marinette’s face as she sputtered out a response was priceless, “Cat Noir? Cat Noir!? What makes you think I’d find Cat Noir attractive at all? And- and- HIM- the cutest superhero! Ridiculous!”

“Utterly ridiculous?”

“Nice one, Alya”

“Thank you so much, Y/N,” you gave Alya a high five on your way to your seat next to Juleka and Rose on the couch facing Marinette and Alya. A sunny Friday after school was the perfect place for Kitty Section and their entourage to hang out. Unfortunately without Ivan and Mylène, seeing as their anniversary called for a private celebration. After pushing a couple couches onto the deck of The Liberty, Alya had predictably started talking about Paris's resident hero team. Today, she chose to ask everyone who they deemed the cutest, and she made sure to jump on Marinette's... interesting response, “And girl, he has the same silky golden hair and dreamy emerald eyes as Adrien Agreste. What’s utterly ridiculous is you freaking out and dodging every time we bring up superheroes!”

The designated snack-boy, Luka, walked out precariously carrying three bowls of goodies for everyone, “Alright, I got more popcorn. Sorry, but looks like we’re out of cheese flavoring, Y/N”

“Oh... that’s fine. I honestly wasn’t expecting it since I forgot to ask,” your free hand not reaching for the bowl rubbed the back of your neck, “but thanks for remembering.”

“Oh, um yeah- Always," is it creepy to remember something so specific? Someone as nice as Y/N wouldn't be interested in some creep. Ugh. Luka took a seat with his own bowl after passing Alya and Marinette theirs. He ended up next to you on the floor, leaning against the arm of the couch, dangerously close to touching your legs.

Rose reached for the popcorn as she interjected, “You know, Alya does have a point. So Marinette, why don’t you just tell us who you think the cutest superhero is, if you don’t like us guessing?”

Somehow Marinette’s face went even paler as she spoke, “What- I mean, I don’t- I haven’t thought- Wha- what about Y/N? Why aren’t you interrogating them?”

Alya crossed her arms, “Because Y/N says the same thing about the same hero every day. Just watch. Ahem, Y/N, care to weigh in on the cuteness level of our lovely Parisian superheroes?”

You looked up from the bowl you had stolen back from Rose with wide eyes, "Hey! Okay, no, that is not fair! Besides, what is our criteria for 'cute'? I mean... Are we going just by physical characteristics? Is costume a factor? What about the animal they're representing, could our opinion of that make this whole thing unfair? And cuteness is so subjective anyway... Why are we even reducing these amazing and honorable superheroes to just their looks? I mean we could be talking about skill, or their powers or power lev-"

"-And your answer would be exactly the same. Seriously, are you done trying- and might I add, failing- to talk yourself out of this one yet? Or should I just read the article you wrote for the Ladyblog?"

"You said you deleted that!"

Luka had perked his head up at your initial fumbling response and turned to you when he spoke, "You wrote an article? That's pretty cool."

You rubbed your face to try and distract yourself from the burning embarrassment, "Umm, yeah. But it was terrible and extremely not. worth. publishing." You hoped the glare you sent the girl in question was enough to scare her into deleting it on the spot, or to at least lie about it, "So Alya kindly deleted it, right?"

Sitting up with a smug look and crossed arms severely lowered your faith that she'd keep quiet. "A good journalist archives everything. Especially something as juicy as one of her besties going on for five thousand words about how dreamy the great Viperion is," dramatically fake-fainting into Marinette's lap, Alya could barely finish before bursting out in laughter. Of course, quickly followed by the others joining in to varying degrees. Juleka and Rose happily giggled to themselves, Marinette looked more relieved that the heat was off her, and Luka seemed to be shocked, or maybe just holding back to see how you were taking this.

Horribly. Horribly embarrassed would describe how you were taking this conversation. You sat there stock-still as you hoped that none of the others could hear your heart's desperate attempts to pound its way out of your chest. That's certainly all you could hear, at least until Alya's voice brought you out of it, "Hey, it's fine," she made her way over to sit next to you as she continued, "We all have our little hero crushes. That's why I bring it up all the time, to show you that it's totally normal! I mean, we all know how I could go on about Carapace for days," Alya gestured for the others to continue, and used her other hand to try and comfort you.

"Well, I find Ladybug to be just absolutely adorable and so kind.... oh it just makes me so happy knowing she's keeping all of Paris safe," Rose added softly.

Juleka brushed a strand of hair aside as she spoke, "Rena Rouge is super mysterious, pretty rad in my opinion."

Alya was rubbing your back like the mom friend she is to try and help encourage you, "See? Super normal, so go ahead and release all this pent up Viperion energy that I know you have. Maybe it'll encourage Marinette here to finally join in the fun!" Alya stuck her tongue out at her best friend, who responded promptly by smashing her face into a pillow.

You just sighed, "I mean- it’s- it can't just-'' were you supposed to just get over it all just like that? Well, at least the embarrassment was wearing off, maybe you could just entertain her for a bit, "Well- um, you see.... HisHairJustLooksReallySoftAnd- you know what. Nope. Can't do anymore of this. Yep- that's all you're getting out of me!" This time when everyone started giggling, you were able to comfortably join them. It was a nice feeling.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A nice evening chilling out with your friends was always welcome, especially with the rising number of akumatizations making that less possible. But the night had come to a close. Alya and Marinette went home, Juleka was walking Rose back herself, and Luka and you had volunteered to clean up. Luka stopped drying the cup in his hand for a minute as he looked at you, “Um, I know it might not be my place, but I want you to know that you don’t have to be embarrassed about the whole... Viperion thing.” God, how am I supposed to take the news that MY crush has a crush on.... Sort of me? Am I supposed to count it as me at all?

“Oh, um. Yeah, thanks. I think I’m over the embarrassment now that it’s out. I don’t know, it’s just that a lot of people think it’s weird since he’s kind of a new hero,” how are you supposed to explain this to him? That you kept such a non-issue secret from him, especially without getting suspiciously defensive about it. “And then people use that to try and say that I only like him for his looks..... And that’s not it! I don’t know, it’s kind of.... A lot? To explain, that is.” This was not going well.

“Oh... Well, what is it? That you like about him, I guess.”

This was so not going well. But he was waiting for a response so... “Uh, well I guess it did kinda start..... that way.... but then I started doing research. I learned about his power and saw videos of his fights. He’s really good! Especially for being so new, which kinda goes into why his power makes me like him so much.” Shit. Rambling, I’m just talking and talking and I need to stop. But how am I supposed to change the subject now? And now Luka’s sitting down, and he seems so invested. Why does this have to happen to me?

“What do you mean by that?”

Luka’s voice kindly shuts your little thought-spiral in its tracks. What were you saying? Oh, Viperion’s powers! You can talk about this, you know this. Just keep talking, at least he seems interested in it, “Well, you know how he can go back and redo the last couple of minutes?” Luka nodded, “Well, we always see the time that worked out. Us civilians get to keep going from the one time it all went right. Just imagine all the times he failed, all the times he couldn’t get it right. It could be dozens, maybe even hundreds of times! He must get so discouraged at some point, I mean I know I would.... I guess I didn’t really think about it at first, but.... but, I doubt I could keep that determination, and I’m so glad Paris has a hero who can, and does.”

Silence. Why was it so quiet? Oh no, he thinks I’m weird. He must think-

“All of this from ‘his hair looks soft’?”

“Hey! You can’t tell me not to be embarrassed, then make fun of me! That’s against the rules!”

Luka chuckled as he said, “Against what rules, exactly?”

“The Rules Of Best Friendship, duh!”

“And who exactly said you were my best friend?”

“Well... your loss, I guess. Now you won’t get an invitation when I plan Rose and Juleka’s wedding,” you brushed off his offended glare as you took the seat next to him.

“She’s my sister.”

“She’d take my side.”

I’d take your side, too. I will always take your side. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

A/N the sequel: I am super bad at finishing things, but I really wanna keep motivated to finish this (like I have a full, probably 3 part, plan for this). If you guys want to help, shoot me a message and I'll send you a link to the google doc I'm writing this on. Feel free to leave a little comment (pls be kind, obviously) and see my writing process! Idk, would any of you guys be interested in that? Would you just get annoyed at having already read the thing before I post it?

[codename-adler]

foxes + onesies (4/9)

based off of that one post i saw and don’t remember, where people once caught Allison wandering around Fox Tower in a giraffe onesie, and i absolutely melted for her. here is the Foxes’ journey to getting a onesie each!

Dan

of course the next Fox to get their onesie is the Danielle Leigh Wilds

though Nicky almost beats her to it, but that’s a story for another time

now. Dan is fierce. Dan is sexy. Dan is strong. Dan is an inspiration to all.

Dan also wants a ridiculous pajama to match with her boyfriend and her best friends

Dan wants to go full-on girly mode, for once

Dan wants to feel like a kid again, wants to be free of responsibilities, wants to be included in the girl gang

Dan wants

she feels like that one time when she had been excluded from her classmate’s birthday party, because she hadn’t lots of money and the birthday girl knew she wouldn’t be able to bring her a present

because Ally’s is for therapy, Matt’s represent a piece of his childhood, and Renee’s is a lover’s gift

(yeah, she now has to deal with that. just like Neil and Andrew, she didn’t see #renison coming at all. the only difference is, she now has to live with them being a couple 24/7. at least Matt and her live separately, that gives the others a little bit of a break… Renee and Ally? Cuddle monsters. PDA champions. but only in their dorm. only in front of Dan. it’s exhausting. she thinks they might be doing it on purpose…)

anyways

Dan doesn’t have a reason, an excuse, a memory to fuel this childish desire to own one of those adult pajamas

and it’s not like Matt or the girls would get the hint to gift her one, seeing as her usual aesthetic is sporty, mature and overall just *powerbabe vibes*

and that’s how she comes to the conclusion that her Sisters are her only hope (she’s that desperate)

five of them have children… and one’s got a baby on the way for the first time… and the other five, well… let’s not get into that

so surely, surely, her girls are going to get it, right? they’ll have insight, they’ll be helpful, right?

yeah, they are, they do

they just laugh their asses off first

Dan calls for a video chat meeting on a Wednesday afternoon, when all of them are least likely to be busy

7 of them are able to make it

however, Dan keeps dancing around the subject, and her Sisters notice it right away

Georgia: Oh. My. God. Dan, are you pregnant??

Darla: Oh God, are you dying??

Flo: Did Matt finally propose??

Michelle: Don’t tell us you guys broke up!!

Courtney: Do you need a lawyer or something??

Camilla: Which bastard hurt you??

June: Do you need help hiding the body??

yeah, dramatic much

Dan ends up being forced to admit the truth before her girls get a heart attack

Dan: Jesus, guys, shut the hell up. I’m fine (*oh shut up Neil*). I just need guidance for… hum… a fashion matter?

that puts her girls in a much better mood

only for all hell to break loose when Dan admits to wanting a fucking onesie pajama

Dan has to mute her laptop

of course, they only tease her because they love her

but still

they have a good time making fun of her

once they calm down, though, they let Dan speak

so she explains what’s been happening in the last few weeks

how she wishes to use that stupid onesie to grow closer to her team, to belong

how she craves something so juvenile because she never had that kind of thing growing up

how she doesn’t know how to proceed without seeming like an attention seeker, a copycat

her Sisters all understand, each in their own way

they finally start asking Dan the right questions

Michelle: So what can we do?

June: I can make you one, if you want. You know I got magic hands *wink*

Flo: D’you need money? We got money, baby. Just say how much.

Darla: You wanna be, like, sexy devil mistress or cute baby angel??

Courtney: Ooh, ooh, a lace one!

Georgia: Courtney no.

Camilla: Courtney yes.

no indeed, Courtney

the main problem, she explained to them, was that she didn’t know what to get

see, Dan doesn’t really like animals; never had one, never obsessed over one, never felt a connection to one

Dan doesn’t particularly like children’s movies either

so, what to get?

Camilla: Okay, but remember when Georgia’s kid started calling us all Care Bears because she was obsessed with it? And she was like, weirdly accurate? What about that?

Michelle: Oh yeah, that was soooo nice. So nice.

Georgia: Oh shut up Michelle, you’re just mad ‘cause my child renamed you Grumpy Bear! She wasn’t wrong, you know.

Courtney: Pff you’re just jealous I got Funshine Bear!

Flo: Okay, enough, enough, now. Dan, which one were you again? Do you even like the idea?

Dan: I guess… I was uh, the pink one. With the hearts on the tummy? Do they even have those in onesies?

Camilla: Oh yeah, Always There Bear! See, Michelle? My daughter’s a psychic. She was right about every one of you.

Flo: Dan, babygirl, they have onesies of everything.

so all the girls pull up pictures of pink Care Bear onesies to show Dan

June is the one who ends up finding Dan’s favorite

it’s baggy, it’s hot pink, it’s cute and fluffy and so not Dan

she loves it

and in bonus, her 11 sisters contribute to pay for her onesie (being the youngest in the family has its perks)

they almost make Dan cry tears of joy

three weeks later (it came from Japan), Dan’s package arrives

it also happens to be Valentine’s Day soon…

(you know where this is going)

it’s Sunday night, the 14th

Dan and Matt have his dorm to themselves

they spend the day with each other, really taking it slow and doing nothing

around 8pm, Dan tells Matt she’s craving some chocolate desserts, so he takes his truck and drives to the closest bakery on campus

meanwhile, Dan puts her plan in action

she pulls out the pink heart-shaped Post-It notes Renee lent her and writes her little messages on them

Hey, pretty boy

Wanna play hide-and-seek…?

Come and find me, pretty boy

You know where I am…

I’m waiting for you XOXO

she sticks them on the front door, all along the hallway and the last one’s on Matt’s bedroom door

Matt is ecstatic when he returns with half a dozen of chocolate eclairs

he chucks the box of desserts in the fridge before he quickly tiptoes to his bedroom

he knocks

and from inside, a voice…

Dan: Come in, pretty boy… I’ve got a surprise for ya…

Matt kicks the door open

and oh. my. lord.

there she is, in all her glory

there’s rose petals all over his bed and the floor

there are lit vanilla-scented candles

there’s slow music playing

and in the middle of the bed, sprawled out like the queen she is, Dan

in her onesie

her neon pink Care Bear onesie

and do you know what the best part is?

Matt isn’t even close to being disappointed

he just thinks, God I love her

as soon as he sees her, he runs and jumps on the bed to join her and make out passionately

and then just as fast, he gets off the bed

Matt: WAIT FOR ME BABY LEMME PUT MINE ON OKAY DON’T YOU MOVE

once he’s back in Dan’s arms, they’re a flurry of pink and orange

they can’t stop giggling

and yeah, they do make love all night long, and eat chocolate eclairs butt-naked

but first they watch their favorite movie, Karate Kid (the one with young Jaden Smith and old Jackie Chan, okay)

so if they weren’t sure of their commitment to this relationship before, after that night, they both knew they would never spend another night with someone else as long as they were alive

they were in perfect harmony

God, I love him // God, I love her

[juniorfics]

Favorite color

mina x GN!reader

written by: R

word count: 1.8k

Warning!: one-sided pining, the word dude used as slang, slight angst, and just a wee bit of internalized homophobia (but only for like, a paragraph) ((also, mina might be slightly out of character, so..sorry about that :p))

y/n was distraught.

No, distraught wasn't the right word...conflicted maybe? Well, whatever the correct word is, they were feeling it.

Allow me to give a bit of context; you see, y/n was crushing on someone. Quite aggressively, actually. they couldn't stop thinking about them. the way they smiled, the way their hair bounced slightly when they walked, the way they could brighten a room so easily with only their presence. Yes, y/n was crushing, but that wasn't the issue. they've had many crushes before. So many, some would see it as a bit of a problem. No, the crushing itself wasn't a huge deal, rather, it was who the crush was on. The gender of the person, to be more specific.

y/n was always more attracted to guys, never finding herself attracted to females in any sort of romantic way. But ever since their first year of high school had begun, it seemed to them that that might not be the case anymore. All because of a certain pink-haired individual. Well, pink hair is a bit of an understatement. Everything about her is pink! Her hair, her skin, her personality, everything! And it suited her too, the color pink. She was a very bright and optimistic person, looking to the bright side of things as often as she could, making others happy by just simply being herself. Not to mention she was very pretty to look at, but that’s more of an opinion that can vary from person to person.

It's pretty safe to say that y/n was more than a bit confused when these feelings first emerged. they can practically pinpoint the moment it happened- when all this crushing began. It was during the school festival, back when they were all still first years. To be more precise, it was when 1-A was performing their concert. The two of them hadn't been in the same class at the time, in fact, y/n wasn't even planning on going to the concert at all, but their friend had convinced them that it would be fun, and they eventually caved, agreeing to go only if he would buy them a strawberry-banana crepe afterward. They had managed to get good seats near the front and patiently waited for the show to start. Then, the lights went out, the curtains opened, and a bunch of people, including their friend, began shouting out the name of one of the girls on stage. ‘Fanboys..’ they thought, waiting for the show to start. Then, before they knew it, the music started, and a bunch of dancers came out. That's when they saw her- Ashido. they had remembered her from the sports festival, as well as seeing her in the hallway a few times. they thought nothing of it and continued enjoying the show. But then, something happened that would change y/n’s perception of the world forever- Ashido had winked.

Granted, Ashido hadn't winked directly at her, rather to that general area of the audience, but y/n saw it nonetheless, and suddenly, their heart had started beating faster, their face steadily increasing in temperature, their hands went clammy and their mouth went dry. Why were they feeling like this? they had never reacted to anything as subtle as a wink this aggressively before. Plus, they had never developed a crush for someone this quickly before, ever! Even their fastest crush had taken a day to develop. ‘Wait, crush? No, I can't have a crush on her! That-that's impossible!’ they thought, shaking their head. they had tuned out the rest of the concert at this point. ‘I don’t like her! No, I can't like her! I like guys! Dudes! Men! people who portray as masculine! I don't like girls! Never have, never will!’ they thought, the words sounding like screams to them. 'And besides! The wink probably wasn't even for me. There's no way she could even see me among all these other people! Yeah, it was probably just to the crowd.’ that's what they told themself, but there was a small voice in the back of their mind that stayed with them for the rest of the day, once the concert was over, while they were eating the crepe they were promised, while they were lying in their bed in the middle of the night; “what if it was for me? What if she did see me? What if she winked at me?’

Over the next few months, they had come to terms with their emotions, accepting the fact that they did, indeed, have a crush on Ashido. Well, less of a crush, more of an obsession. But hey, this was how they always handled these things. their feelings were still a bit confusing, but they couldn't just ignore them. they promised themselves a long time ago that they would always acknowledge their feelings, no matter who they were for. So this has become y/n’s current dilemma. They were already halfway through their second year and they hadn't even made an attempt at confessing. However, a few weeks ago, they decided that they would confess on the last day of April.

Which just so happened to be today.

y/n was extremely nervous. they were gonna confess her feelings, of course they were nervous! But they told themself they would, and that's what they were gonna do.

~

The final bell rang, and school was officially over. y/n practically jumped out of their seat, speed walking out of the classroom, and into the hallway. This was it! they were gonna confess her feelings! they had to find Ashido first, though. Luckily, they had memorized Ashido’s schedule, and what hallways she normally took, so this wouldn't really be a problem. Yes, a bit stalkerish, but it came in handy for moments like this. Finally, they got to the hallway they needed to be at and waited for a moment. Soon enough, a bunch of footsteps, along with idle chatter, got closer and closer, and closer, until-

“Aghhh, today’s training was super tough today! I'm so soreee…”

“Right? I can barely feel my legs, it's like I'm walking on jello,”

“It doesn't help that midterms are coming up as well, my brain is just as sore,”

y/n watched as the friend group passed by, not even noticing them. Just when they were far enough so it didn't seem creepy, they walked out, clearing their throat.

“U-um...Ashido?”

The group turned around, signs of confusion on their faces. The girl in question stepped towards them slightly, a small bounce in her step.

“Hmm?”

y/n’s face tinted pink. they hoped it wasn't too noticeable. “U-uh, hi. I-i know you don't know me, b-but do you think I could talk to you for a sec? I-it won't take long, promise!” they blurted out, hands behind their back.

Ashido smiled, thinking it was probably a shy fan or something. “Yea, of course! What's up?”

There was a small silence.

“...a-alone?” y/n muttered, their face getting slightly redder.

Ashido blinked. “Oh, alright!-” she turned to her friends, making a small shooing motion with her hand.- “you guys go on ahead! I'll catch up later,”

“Well, okay. Just don't take too long, or we're gonna get boba tea without you!” the blonde one joked, waving behind him as the other two followed after him. Ashido stuck her tongue out at them, before chuckling and turning back to face y/n.

“So, what were you saying?” she said, smiling at them.

y/n almost had a heart attack. ‘So cute..’ they thought, fidgeting with the hem of their shirt. “W-well, I just wanted to-”

“Wait...you’re the crush dude, right?” Ashido questioned, snapping her fingers as if she had an ‘aha!’ moment.

y/n blinked. “...c-crush dude?”

“Yea! I've heard about you from some of the general student kids!”

“O-oh...well I just wanted to tell you that-”

“Wait, WAIT! Don't tell me...you like one of my friends, right?”

“H-huh? No, that's not-”

“Lemme guess, it's Denki, isn't it? Wait, no, you don't really seem like you’d be into him...what about Hanta? He's pretty cool, and you guys would look good together! Ooh, did you want me to tell him to you? Cause I can do that if you want-”

“ASHIDO!” y/n yelled, getting frustrated. Ashido froze, looking at y/n. She admits that she does have a tendency to talk over people, but she definitely didn't expect someone like y/n to flat out yell at her. y/n took a deep breath, looking back at Ashido.

“Look, i-I'm sorry I yelled, it's just- I have something really important I wanna tell you.” they looked at the ground, their blush getting darker. Ashido wasn't saying anything, so they began speaking again.

“I-i don't like any of your friends...I like you, Ashido. A-and I'm not entirely sure if you swing that way or anything, to be honest, I didn't think I did either, but here I am!” they chuckled nervously, staring at their shoes. “A-anyway, what I'm trying to say is, y-you don't have to reciprocate, I-i just thought you should know.”

they looked up, finally ready to see Ashido's reaction, and- blank. Her face was completely blank. y/n could feel tears welling up in their eyes. Had they said something wrong? Who were they kidding, of course they had. they had confessed to a girl. Ashido probably thought they were super weird. To make matters worse, they’ve never even spoken to each other before this! y/n had completely screwed up. If there was any sort of chance that they could've been friends, let alone romantic partners, it was all gone now. they sniffed, wiping their eyes. they turned around, not wanting to hear any of the comments they expected.

“Hey, wait!”

they froze, turning back around. Ashido was a few steps closer now, a look of concern on her face. She looked like she had to say something, but couldn't find the words to do so. After a few seconds of silence, she spoke, clearly nervous.

“Well, first of all, thank you for telling me. I appreciate it. And, um…” her face began getting pinker. “I...I wouldn't mind going on a date. A-as long as you’re comfortable with it, of course.” she smiled, rubbing the back of her neck.

A date? y/n couldn't believe it. they were speechless. they didn't think they were weird, or a freak, or anything? “You...you don't think I'm weird? We’ve never even talked..”

“Well, that may be true, but that's what dates are for, right? To get to know someone better! Plus, it would be nice being seen in public with someone as cute as you!” she winked, a huge grin on her face.

‘C-cute?!?!? She thinks I'm cute!! Omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg-’ y/n’s face was practically as red as an apple, but so was Ashido's, so they felt a little bit better about it.

“Y-yeah, a date sounds wonderful,” they said, fidgeting with the hem of their shirt again. “I-i’m free on the 4th!”

“Alrighty then! Here, gimme your phone.”

They then traded numbers, and Ashido ran off to meet up with her friends again, promising to work out the details later. y/n smiled.

Yep, there was no denying it- pink was definitely their favorite color.

[hermit-pistol]

conspiracies and confessions (mista x reader)

This is for @honey-pea as the result of the 100 follower raffle! Yes it’s goofy...but I love it so- enjoy!  :>

You never thought that you would ever become a member of a gang, yet here you are. When Bruno Bucciarati asked you, just a common pickpocket, to become a member of Passione, you couldn't believe it. 

"You're joking, right?" 

"Passione is no joke. I think that you would fit in well. While we may have differing backgrounds, I treat my gang like family." 

He wasn't joking about that, once you passed Polpo's test and gained a "stand" of your very own, the other members of the gang welcomed you, surprisingly.

There was Narancia, an energetic young boy, Fugo, a little reserved in nature, Abbacchio, who hated your guts (or so you thought, anyway), and Mista. 

Oh, Mista. 

You probably got along the best with him. You two had the most in common, he was just so easy to talk to! More often than not you would be up until the early hours of the morning giggling about some stupid internet videos or chatting about the latest gossip. 

You would be lying to yourself if you said there were times where you thought of him as more than a friend. But, you didn't want to spoil the good relationship that you already had, although it may have been platonic in nature. 

Until then, you appreciated what you had.

----

It had been a little over a year since you joined Bruno's gang, and you could say that you had really found your home there. Another member had joined as well, going by the name of Giorno Giovanna. He was good, strong both physically and mentally, and was your team's secret weapon as of late. 

Given the nature of the missions from the boss lately, your group had been living in a tiny room inside of a turtle for longer than you would have liked. Between missions, everyone was grumpy and irritable, either camping out on the couches or floor or complaining that there weren't enough drinks in the mini-fridge. 

It also didn't help that Trish Una, the boss' daughter that they were in charge of protecting... was extremely demanding. 

After a couple of weeks of living in the furthest thing from paradise, Bruno decided that it was time for a change. 

"I've booked us a place for a couple of nights." It seemed as if everyone breathed a collective sigh of relief. "It's only fair since we've been working so hard lately." 

"Is there a pool?? I wanna go swimming!" Narancia all but yelled as he stood up from where he was slumped on the couch, excitement shone in his eyes. 

"Did you get a hotel, Bucciarati?" Abbacchio leaned back in his chair, folding his arms behind his head. 

"I didn't, the boss did. He's looked so favorably upon us that we each get our own rooms too." He raised his eyebrows, which could barely be seen behind his bangs. "Pretty neat, huh?" 

"It's about time that we got some reward for our hard work!" Mista pumped his fist into the air. Sex Pistols cheered as well, probably at the thought of all the gourmet food that they were about to eat. 

"When do we get to go?" You asked, never looking up from your book. You had started it that morning. 

"Tonight, actually. Be ready to check-in in about an hour or so." You could hear a loud 'YAY' from under Mista's hat. How cute! 

---

Within the next hour, you were laying on a plush hotel bed, continuing your reading. Bruno, Giorno, Trish, and Abbacchio were relaxing in their own rooms, but you distinctly remember Narancia saying that he was going to drag Mista and Fugo into the swimming pool. He had also asked you to go, but at that time you had found that you preferred the quiet company of a book compared to screaming children (Narancia included) at a public pool. 

It was about the paranormal, one of your favorite subjects. Nothing beats reading about creepy facts in a hotel room in the early evening, right? Your mind was racing when you heard a knock on the door. 

Throwing your book on the bed, you padded along the plush carpeting to the doorway, looking outside the peephole. It was Mista, looking around. A big smile crept onto your features as you undid the deadbolt. "Helloooo~ welcome to my crib." You giggled at your stupidity. 

Thankfully, Mista appreciated your goofy sense of humor. "You dork, if you're gonna talk to me like that for the rest of the night I should probably leave." He said in a serious tone, obviously joking. 

"Yeah, be my guest." You settled back into your comfy spot in the middle of the bed. "I thought that you were going to be at the pool with the other guys?" 

"Eh, I told them that I would join them in a little bit. The Pistols wouldn't stop complaining about wanting to see you, though." He took off his hat momentarily to let out his mischievous stand. They circled around you chanting your name. "We've missed you!" they spoke in unison. 

"I saw you all yesterday. Talk about clingy." You giggled. "I've just been reading." 

"Ooh what about?" Mista asked as he sat down on the bed next to you. You always loved when he was interested in your hobbies.

"It's about creepy stuff. Did you know that if you wake up in the middle of the night it could be because your body senses someone was staring at you?" 

"I did not, but that's absolutely terrifying." He let out a nervous laugh. "Uh...now that the adrenaline is kicking in we should read it together. I didn't need sleep tonight anyways." 

"Good idea." You opened the book, with the Sex Pistols nestling themselves in between the two of you. 

After reading for about 30 minutes or so, Mista pointed out one interesting fact himself. He was so close to you, and you hoped that he didn't hear your racing heart. 

"It says that to avoid the influences of mind control, you should craft a hat out of...tinfoil?" Pffft. "Y/N I know what we have to do now." 

"Oh yeah? Where are we gonna get it? I most certainly don't have any tinfoil on me..." 

"Abbacchio. He has to have some. He does all sorts of crazy shit to his hair." You shrugged your shoulders. You decided to let him take responsibility as the two of you left your room to make the short walk down the hall. 

One embarrassing encounter later, you had learned that Abbacchio did not have your 'fucking stupid tinfoil' and proceeded to cuss you out accordingly.

Luckily, the little convenience store down the road carried some. You picked up a pair of scissors as well, and were soon walking back to the hotel laughing about what was to come. 

"Okay Pistols, do you guys want hats too?" Mista asked once the two of you had returned to the room. They all squealed with joy. Well, there was your answer. 

You un-boxed the scissors and started cutting the first strip of the foil. It made such a satisfying sound. 

You started with 6 small strips for each of the pistols. Once they were cut, you formed the easily-malleable substance into small cones. 

"C'mere guys." You placed each one on their heads, which fit perfectly. Next you set to work making two larger ones for Mista and yourself. 

"Mista look at me!" Number 7 floated around the comforter.

"MEEESTA! Number 3 ripped my hat!" Number 5 cried as he sat on your shoulder. The thought of knowing that he wouldn't be susceptible to mind control comforted him even though his hat was’t in the best condition.

You stopped your work and examined his hat. "Number 5, it looks fine to me. Big Brother won't pierce your brain waves today. Dry those tears." 

"O-okay." He sniffled. By this point you had finished the hats. You and Mista decided to take pictures of each other to see how ridiculous you looked. 

"I look like a pointy toe." You laughed out loud as you walked to the bathroom mirror. "Let's take a picture together!" 

"Alright." He was at your side, and just before you took the picture he decided to sling an arm around you. In the moment you jumped, therefore ruining the picture. "Lemme see! You gotta send this to me." 

You looked at the result of your stupidity: a blurry picture produced by shaky hand syndrome. "Uh, let's take another one." You readied your camera, determined to make memories. 

This time when Mista put his arm around you you didn't even flinch. It felt...natural. 

The two of you were having a good time until the power went out. You could barely see your hand in front of your face, and the Pistols started screaming. "M-mista!" You could hear the whimpers of Number 5 from the other room. 

"I'm coming guys!" Mista called. "Y/N gimme your hand." You reached around the bathroom blindly, and instead made contact with his exposed midriff. Oops. 

"Sorry, sorry!" You could hear the humility in your voice as you trailed your touch over his arm to eventually reach his hand. It felt quite warm. Yours were just clammy from being a nervous wreck. 

Soon all of you were huddled together on the bed again, using cell phones for lighting. "A hotel having a power outage..seems a little strange, don't you think?" You asked. 

"Is this our next conspiracy?" Mista smirked. You still couldn't take him seriously with his tinfoil hat on. 

"Yes, Mista. The conspiracy of the idiot in the hotel room. How spooky." Your heart stopped when you heard the scratching on the door. 

"W-what was that."

"You're asking me?" Through the dim phone screen lights, you could see a worried expression cross his handsome features. "I guess that means that we have to check it out." 

"We? This is all you buddy." You gave him a playful shove, although the tone present in your voice was anything but. 

Mista got up and straightened out his outfit. He walked up to the peephole on shaky legs. "There's..no one here." He breathed a sigh of relief. 

"That's weird." You relaxed a little, the Pistols curling up in your arms, tinfoil hats scratching you.

That's when the thumping started. 

Mista was still at the door terrified. "Come here!" You mouthed, and he wasted no time in sprinting back to the bed. "Mista, I'm kind of freaked out." 

"It's okay, I am too." He opened his arms, inviting you in. You fell into them without a second thought. The Pistols joined in as well, and soon all of you were a giant ball of cuddling and crinkled tinfoil. 

You felt his heart race as you pressed your ear against his chest. You figured that since you might not get another opportunity like this you might as well confess your blossoming feelings. 

"Mista I have something to say..." His dark eyes bore into yours. 

"Sure, what's up?" The thumps were growing louder and more frequent now. 

"I really enjoy spending time with you, and you've really helped me find my place in Passione. You're definitely the member that I've grown closest to and I appreciate that, but over the past year, I've realized that maybe..." You tightened your grip on his torso.

"Maybe what? That you have romantic feelings?" 

You were shocked. "Well, you took the words right out of my mouth." The Pistols let out a collective 'oooh'. You could have sworn that you heard a distinct, 'Mista has a girlfriend~' taunt coming from one of them...probably Number 3.

The thumping was so loud at this point, you let out a scream holding onto Mista for dear life. It seemed as if the door were about to fall off of its hinges. The door eventually swung open violently. With the intensity that it had made contact with the wall you could tell that the flimsy hotel drywall was cracked. 

The lighting provided by the emergency exit signs brought out the outline of a figure, with a flowing garb and...ears? 

Thoughts were racing through your head. You whispered over to Mista, watching the figure carefully, "I think I know what that is, I read about it in my book earlier. Page 343. It's a catboy." 

"A catboy?! What...I thought those were only-" 

"A cryptid? A figment of the imagination? Me too, but we are not your average goons. We are prepared," Your eyes looked up, indicating to your hats, "I think we should rush him. The book says that they're not that violent." 

"I'm following you on this one Y/N." He was too scared to look at the figure standing in the doorway. It was surprising that it hadn't yet made a move. 

"Okay, 3.." 

"2.."

"1.. CHARGE!" Mista leapt off of the bed and ran up to the creature, tackling him to the floor, his tinfoil hat flying off.

"TAKE THAT CATBOY!" You screamed as the two wrestled on the ground, and as if on cue the lights turned back on. 

"Get off of me!" The figure turned out to be Giorno Giovanna, wearing a robe and hair curlers. "Why are you attacking me Mista, why are all of you wearing those ridiculous hats, and most importantly why am I a catboy?" You could sense the anger in his voice, which was very uncharacteristic of him since he was usually so level-headed. 

"I-" you started, taking off your hat and shamefully placing it on the bed. "We were just having a little bit of fun. Then the power turned off and we got paranoid. I'm sorry Giorno." 

"I noticed the power went out so I went to check on everyone else, I did not expect to have you lock me out of your room and then be tackled to the floor." Giorno adjusted one of his rollers that had fallen out of place due to the beatdown. 

"Sorry man, let's talk about it tomorrow morning? When emotions aren't getting in the way." Mista gave a goofy grin, and Giorno rolled his eyes in response and bid them a barely audible 'good night' as he walked down the hallway. 

Once again, it was just you, Mista, and the Pistols. At least the lights were back on again. "You're gonna have to explain that catboy thing to him later, he seemed very disturbed." 

"Will do, but back to earlier-" He sat back down on the bed with you, grabbing your hand softly. "Did you really mean all those things you said?" 

"I really did, there's no one else that I would rather be an idiot with, idiot." You laughed and placed your discarded tinfoil hat onto his head. 

The Pistols cheered, with Number 5 shedding a few tears in the process, "Man, I just love a happy ending." 

"I think that a sleepover is in order?" You playfully nudged him. 

"Count me in."

[sophiexteresa]

Thomas Sanders Instagram Q&A Transcript

From @thatsthat24’s Instagram story, 25/8/2020. Questions in bold. Text added to the story in (parenthesis/brackets), and descriptive info in *italics*. I tried uploading the video(s) too, but Tumblr is having issues, so here’s the transcript only! 

Thomas: I had some time this evening so I figured, hey, why not? Another lil’ Q an’ A, so if you want to ask a question *posh French voice* be my guest!

When approximately will the next sanders sides be out? Very good question! Uh, we are aiming this for a late September release, that’s what we’re all working towards.

Favourite musical you have been in or just favourite musical in general? This is really tough, I can’t decide. I’m between Rent where I was in the ensemble, Peter Pan where I played Slightly Soiled, which was just one of the lost boyos — boyos? Boys — and, uh, Into The Woods where I played Cinderella’s prince and that’s where Roman’s first costume came from.

Are you ever gonna due your hair purple again? I loved it! Yes! I miss the purple hair too.

Do you love me? *laughing* Yes of course! I do love me.

What would each of the sides’ reaction be to seeing the Grand Canyon? *speaking very quickly* Roman would be revelling that we made the journey, Patton would be marvelling at the memories being made, Logan would be telling you to look at these fascinating signs for important information, Virgil would be telling you to ‘get back from those cliffs!’, Janus would be telling you to take pictures to make it look like you’re next to the cliff, ‘for clout’, and Remus would be like *Remus voice* ‘you could push somebody and get away with it’.

Also when will we get more Picani, I miss him? You and me both, Bri, and honestly with the amount of amazing cartoons that have come out recently *sighs while smiling* yeah, I am a-hankering (?) to get back to Emile!

How have you been doing, like really? Mental health is important as you teach us: I feel like everybody’s kinda struggling with mental health right now, especially people in the USA with COVID. Uhm *clears throat* for me I continuously struggle with the balance between work and leisure time, um, social media makes that difficult, blurs the lines, and I’m working on it.

Do you have any tattoos? Umm, I don’t, uh, I struggle with the permanence of tattoos. And like do I, can I, make a decision that I like? But! There are tattoos that I might like. Where I’d put them, I have no idea, umm, but I think like, maybe like, little stars!

What rank of “Gay” are you? Big gay? What rank? *speechless pause* uh... General. You know? I wanna do my duty. Come back a hero. An all-American Queero *gets an idea* *roughly quoting Hamilton* Queer comes the General!

Can you please make Logan day something Patton would say? *Logan’s voice* Something Patton would say? Umm... please, I request more baked goods from the kitchen so that I can fill Thomas’s body with more trans-fats at 3 am. I don’t know, I don’t like this game.

Have you ever dated a girl? *awkward silence* I have. It was pretty uneventful.

Do you miss your friends? *laughs* Oh... *face crumples as if he’s about to cry*

What are you voice acting in or are you now allowed to say? Not until tomorrow.

When did you know you were gay? I think I answered this one on the last Q&A, but it was early. I was like, 9 or 10 at least.

When will we see Gavin? Gavin has started school! He’s back in his hometown, so I don’t know when I’m gonna see him. He’s still getting taller — I can actually include a picture of him that his mom sent me after he got a new little hairdo *insert photo of an awesome Gavin here*

Do you miss vine? For like, sentimental reasons, yes. Uh, I mean, technically it had its issues and I don’t miss being restricted to 6 seconds anymore *laughs*

What has been your favourite part of the day? My favourite part of today was actually... I came up with this last minute short video, and I got it done and I sent it to some friends and they really liked it. I have to save it until Thursday thought, but it’s just nice to come up with stuff that makes your friends laugh.

Janus acting like Remus? *Remus’ voice* Remus here! Looks like the Dukey just dropped in! *Remus’ laugh* *Takes a breath and snaps into Janus’ character* I spend a lot of time with him so I’ve had a lot of practise.

Why do I feel like we’re gonna have another angsty Virgil moment? When is Virgil not being angsty...?

Please can you say trans rights? Uh, heck yah trans rights! I, uh, this one was very simple but I wanted to say it!

Do you think Virgil would be into anime? Actually, if you remember from, uh, Accepting Anxiety, uh, part 2, there’s actually a Death Note poster in his room, so he definitely likes some anime.

Hi! Can you say hola to the Hispanic fanders in el vecindario fander? Please? We love you! Oh my gosh, *a very naturally american pronunciation* hola! that’s very kind of you guys. I appreciate all of the support you guys give, and I love all of you guys. 

STORYTIME! I love you: *upbeat voice* Storytime! I love you back.

How gay are you? Like, 15 gay! I rank General! 

How did you end up meeting and babysitting Gavin? Gavin is actually Leo’s nephew, so he would come up here, uh, during the holidays or during the summer, and alternate being baby-sat between me and Leo’s mom - his grandma.

What was the inspo for Janus’ outfit? Ooh, that’s a really good question, uh... Joan had a vision in their mind for almost kind of like this early 20th century or late 19th century kinda Jack the Ripper vibe.

Any advice for gaybies to fit in with society? Don’t apologise for being yourself. If people have an issue, that’s their issue that they have to work through. Do not apologise for being yourself. 

What type of gay are you? (Math gay, plant gay, caffine gay, etc): Wait, there’s such thing as a math gay? I am absolutely that, and I feel like I’m just gonna be naming traits about myself but I’m a trivia gay, a driving gay, apparently a math gay, a Disney gay *laughs* and a theatre gay.

Not a question but I’m glad to be alive at the same time as someone as great as you: Dude, this stuff is really sweet. *laughs* That’s really sweet, umm, trust me, I feel the same way about all of you. Honestly.

Why don’t you own a doggo yet? I... went to Petsmart today - I didn’t get an animal, but like... I’m thinking about it and this question is like... hmmm...

I’ve run out of cartoons to watch, any recommendations? Owl house! Owl house, owl house. I just tried it, and I immediately got hooked. Infinity train’s also a really good one, duck tales is amazing, and I’m getting ready to start Tangled: the animated series, so *shrugs*.

What is Patton’s opinion on rats? *adorable Patton voice, slowly zooming in on his face* They are tiny little squishy precious babies!!!

How do I ask people for their pronouns? I don’t know, I mean, I don’t think it’s like a big deal? I hope we could get to the point where we could just be like ‘what are your pronouns?’ and then they would tell you, and then you’d just, you know, carry on the rest of your conversation. 

A circle has no bounds and it’s the same with your beauty: This is really precious, and it of course came from Nash (?) who is a poet, he published a lot of wonderful, wonderful poems on twitter, they are are amazing, and you are once again far too sweet, Nash. 

Dream role? This is a pretty broad question, so maybe dream theatrical role would be Sweeny Todd, dream movie role would be anything in the marvel universe, uh, really just give me anything in any voice acting role, *smiling mischievously* egg rolls are also really good.

Can Remus please say ‘I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand’? *Remus voice* I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand! (love that vine)

Are there still plans for the Roman series? *nods* Oh, yeah, yeah, it was definitely hindered by COVID, uh, as was this Sanders Asides episode that’s coming up, which is why it’s taking longer in the editing stage, it is our, uh... strategy, for circumventing the obstacle, and we hope you like it.

Are we still getting an August playlist? Uh, heck yah you are! But honestly, actually, if you guys have any suggestions I should include in the playlist, lemme know! I’d be happy to get some suggestions - but yes. You will be definitely getting one.

May I please see your feet? *confused, slightly disgusted expression* *begins to move the camera away from his face* *holds up a tape measure, extended to 1 foot long* *grins*

Any shows on Netflix to recommend? Umbrella Academy is really good, Dragon Prince, uh, She-Ra, of course, umm The Hollow (?) is really cool, there’s a documentary about video games called High Score, that was really fun.

Roman, who would you say the gayest side is? *Roman’s voice* Oh, we’re all equally gay, okay? *chuckles* it’s a sexuality, not a personality trait. *takes a breath and speaks quickly* I’m just kidding it’s *sings* meeeeee!

If you were not a YouTuber, what would you see yourself doing and why? Uh, maybe putting my chemical engineering degree to some use. *laughs awkwardly* Uh, I went to school for 5 years for that one.

Like you literally make me so flipping happy: I’m glad! I don’t know what I’m doing to do that, but the feeling is absolutely mutual. 

Can we have Virgil saying “Falsehood”? *hair already over one eye, in Virgil’s voice* Uh, c’mon, okay, sure. *very quietly and unenthusiastically* falsehood. Is that good? Is that? I don’t know, I don’t wanna steal his bit.

Which Sanders Side do you feel you embody most? Ah, I would probably say it’s either Patton or Roman because Patton can be definitely me, all the time, just really enthusiastic about things and finding things cute, but Roman... Roman’s sensitivity, oh. That’s me. 

What was the first job you had? I actually worked as a page in a library! A- pages basically just kinda like, shelve books, check books out; it’s one of the chillest jobs I’ve ever had, one of my favourites, and my dad always had a lovely dad joke for it: ‘you’re working as a page, when do you get promoted to a book?’

How tall are you? I usually say 5ft 10, but I think I’m trying to be a little more realistic with myself. And I’m probably 5ft 9 and a half. *zooms in on his face, staring into the camera* I’m holding onto that half a foot for all dear life. 

DROP THE SKIN ROUTINE PLEASE! This is very sweet, uh, I, *laughs nervously*, uh, I use Curology? They’re very nice. Umm, just... different kinds of lotion, I guess. (I suppose I should write down what I do lol)

Can we get a FALSEHOOD? *is standing* *clears throat* *points upwards from his eyeline* FALSEHOOD! 

Do you have a boyfriend if not are you planning on dating soon? I do not, uh, dating is kinda difficult right now midst COVID, you know, kinda tough... love... in the time of Corona... umm, but, you know, option’s open.

When was your first kiss? I’m sure I’ve answered this somewhere, it was in high school, I might have been 15 or 16. It was with a girl. *Shakes head* And all I can remember is hitting teeth. A lot.

Can we get a super super vague hint about the new Asides episode?  Alright, I’m getting ready to end the Q&A, so this, you know, if you’ve made it so far you deserve this super vague answer, umm... it includes a side that was not in the last episode. (This isn’t much, I apologise lol)

Thomas: And that is it for this evening! Thank you so much, you guys, for watching. I know some of you are still over in Europe watching and it’s like 4 in the morning, and I need to go to bed so thank you all so much for your questions - I gotta do this more often ‘cause I really enjoy it. Love you guys, gals, and non-binary pals. Peace out!

[jawusa]

Goldie’s Adventures on the Moon - Day 3

Chapter 3: Is it love, when so easily said goodbye? 

Ever since Mom's passed away, I always woke up with tears. She used to wake me up for school in the mornings - something that not everyone would do. My mom was by far the best mom out there! But something was strange on that day, I wasn't thinking about Mom when I woke up. I wasn't thinking about how she used to cook pancakes with me in the mornings. I wasn't thinking about how we'd sometimes go hiking around town. I wasn't even thinking about how she'd read me to sleep when I was a little kid. On that day, I was actually thinking about... uhmm about that cute boy whom I met just two days ago? And I didn't wake up with tears, but with a stange feeling of joy! I actually woke up with a smile after such a long time of grieving! 

Dad, Rhett and I decided to go to the Lunar Zen Garden on that day! Actually, we went there... because my Dad's seen this place with Rhett yesterday while I was spending some time in Hua's clothier and they really wanted me to check that place out. They'd say it's the best place for me to find happiness! They'd tell me to toss a coin in that shrine thingy and wish something! At first, I didn't really approve of what I was supposed to do - but I guess, it really did some magic on me? Because of the things... which came about later on that day... that day was kinda strange, though!

But I really loved the garden, though! It was so beautifully decorated with those tiny bridges and canals... and those cherry trees! Oh my! I really had a great time raking the zen garden! It felt so relaxing - but forreal! 

Rhett came to check on me every now and then, but I kept on shooing him away... he just... couldn't see that I was trying to concentrate and find my inner peace? Sheesh! He was playing some mahjong - or what was that game called again? - with Dad and those natives. Sometimes they ask me whether I'd like to join them, but there was this guy I kinda thought looked weird with such a top hat and Asian looking clothing... some people know him as the Unsavory Charlatan - that name already scared me off! But Dad and Rhett were still going for the game... (btw, I couldn't take a picture of him, he'd avoid being on camera for some reason... but he was playing with those other natives on the other table!) 

Anyway, I was soo into medidating, that I completely forgot what was all around me. For one second, I even forgot where I was... I couldn't hear anything... I couldn't see anything... I couldn't even feel anything, not even the ground! It felt like I was levitating forreal! But... hold on, I felt something observing me from the other side... I felt something smiling at me... I felt... I felt something approaching me... I felt... I felt... I... "Hey, OMG you're Goldie! What a surprise to see you around here! How are things with you?" 

I... could literally just... GOSHH! Ground, pleasee, PLEASEE swallow me?! That was soo embarrassing... and when I looked around, I saw his friend (with whom he had played chess before... all the time?)! He was smiling at me... mischievously? "Hehe, I've seen you raking, then medidating..." "Ooh, so.. you've literally seen everything?" "Hey... you didn't do that bad... let's just... have this moment together!" *grabs hand OMG and then, YOU GUYS, he GRABBED my hand... OMG, I... I didn't even know what to say at that moment! At first I was afraid... I was petrified! 

"Goldie, I've been trying to say this to you ever since I've first met you... ever since I've first seen you, ... ever since Day 1, but uhmm..." 

"I think I have a crush on you, Goldie! Your eyes are so beautiful! I... I'm so into you, I can barely breathe! "Uhmm... Qiu, I..." "I've been waiting and waiting for you to make a move... before I make a move!"

And then, he really kissed my lips! OMG, that was my first kiss... and I'd never imagine it to be in a romantic zen garden... in outer space! They say you never forget your very first kiss, and now I can see why! Either way, it was lovely! "So, uhmm... now you know, how I feel towards you, Goldie!" "Awww, you're soo romantic! I think I have a crush on you, too! I was shy to tell you this as well... and actually, I didn't even know myself what was going on... because I've never been this shy before, I'm actually an outgoing girl, I never had to struggle to find the words and it's so strange... I couldn't even... " "Lemme hug you one last time, babe!" *Goldie blushes 

Dad and Rhett must have probably seen me when I had my first kiss... they smiled at me... my Dad even winked at me, but we didn't say any words. It was just this... awkward moment where nobody would talk... and all! I was getting hungry... and just asked my Dad whether we'd go for a dinner soon? Since it was already getting too late... he just nodded and kept on smiling... which was even WEIRDER than it was before!

Anyway, later on that day, we went to dine in a traditional tea house/restaurant! They didn't have my favorite hamburgers on their menu, but they had other fancy-looking meals... which I haven't heard of before! I couldn't really choose, because literally EVERYTHING seemed foreign to me! But I could remember ordering something... which looked like a salmon on the menu! Not that I tried it before, but it looked somewhat familiar to what I'm used to, so I went for it! The salmon was... good! Though, I wasn't sure, why Rhett decided to eat on a different table! Maybe he did that on purpose, so I could have some "daddy & daughter" time? I don't know... but Dad told me something... out of blue. All of sudden, he was like: "Girl, I'm so glad to see you happy again! I told you, you'd be happy after tossing a coin or two into that shrine..." At that moment, I understood why he kept insisting me on tossing that coin into that shrine thingy when we first arrived at the Lunar Zen Garden... 

By the time we finished our dinner, the sun still hadn't set yet, and Rhett insisted on visiting the spa & gym... he's heard that they have these hot springs, which he REALLY wanted to try out... I mean, I couldn't blame him! After all, I was curious to see what these moon geysirs were all about! Thankfully, we had a great time spending time together as a family! I just noticed how I missed that in the past, but for the first time after all of these years, I wish that Candy were here as well! Things were about to improve between I and Rhett, too! I was getting along with all of them! Back in my miserable days, I'd always reject Rhett - remember the "silly" attempts of him trying to talk to me through my childhood teddy bear... GOSH, he was trying to cheer me up and I acted like an idiot! "Uhmm, Rhett? I'd like to tell you something..." "What?" "Well, now that I think, I really appreciate all the effort you've done for me! Like... you know, to cheer me up with the teddy bear and all..." "Yeah, I remember... it was probably a bad idea. I thought it'd work since as a kid, it did..." "Well, I'm a teenager now..." "True." "But hey, at least you tried to cheer me up... and to tell the truth, it does cheer me up, now that I think you tried to do something for me! Thanks for that!" "You're welcome, but look behind you! Isn't that your new boyfriend?" 

I turned my head... and OMG, it was him indeed! It was Q! And when I looked upon him... he winked at me! "So, I bet you guys want some privacy, right?" "Daaad... I'm..." "I know what you mean, Goldie! I've felt this way many times when I had my first fling in the hot tub!" *winks at Qiu and Goldie 

It kinda felt bizarre when my Dad had to give away way too much info... and it made me feel very AWKWARD at that moment! Like FORREAL! They all were into something... all of these boys! I just couldn't... understand them! Q didn't even seem to be irritated or something... I just hope he does forget about what my Dad just decided to reveal? It was a steamy atmosphere, though... with him! But not just with him, I mean... it was literally steamy, what else would you expect at the hot springs? So... that "steamy" term applies well here! Either way... I really enjoyed this steamy moment with... uhm, him? As always, kinda... Dad and Rhett would tell me that they'd be "out for fun" again... like on the other days. They never really told me where they'd go, but it had always to do with nightlife venues... kinda? Anyway, I couldn't blame them anymore... I mean, I'm a grown-up girl now and I don't need their company all the time! As much as I wanted to be left "alone" with Q, I guess... they wanted to have some time off on their own, too! 

But... my, oh, my! Those dance moves! LOL! Even I could dance better... I mean, Rhett's got something still, but Dad, he really sucks at dancing! But he thinks he can dance, he can jive! But at least, he's having the time of his life! And I'm happy for him... and Rhett, too! In the past, I'd be mad at him for moving on too fast, but he's right! We can't be stuck in sorrow FOREVER! One day, we just... have to break free and be happy again!

If I were to choose which day my favourite day was on the moon... I guess, it'd be this one here? I just had my first kiss? OMG, how cool's that?! And did you hear what he said? He just confessed his feelings to me... and I could finally do as well! I WASN'T expecting ANY of this! This is soooo GREAT! OMG! I'm literally melting! Alright, enough is enough... lol! But I could literally be raving about him all day long! I felt SO flattered when he confessed his feelings... Oh, wait, I have to tell this Hua! And Virginia, my best friend back in Widespot, too! Maybe this would even encourage her to confess her feelings to Woddy, too! I mean, she's told me once that she's a crush on that Woody boy? Why did I forget that? HOW could I forget that?! They don't even know what just happened today! Hold on, dear diary, let me text to them real quick...

[nep-moved]

lotsa nyall don't know Iothric so here is my overly long post in which i tell u abt him 👁👁

i'm bad at talking nd idk how 2 start this off but here we go fjdjsk. i will be leavin out lotsa stuff abt the game bc i am just here 2 talk abt my husband gjfjsk

the game describes everythin so vaguely so forgive me if this this part sounds confusing but: in dark souIs there's this thing called the first flame !! it brought the age of fire, nd it was a v prosperous time nd bred lotsa nations !! before the age of fire was the age of ancients; the world was unformed nd not much existed there.

to keep the first flame going nd therefore keep the world from returning to that time of darkness, a rly powerful soul has 2 be given to the flame to keep it goin fr a while. lord gwyn was the first one 2 sacrifice himself to the flame (( he's also gwyndoIin's awful dad but this ain't abt him )) but ye. as time goes on there's more and more sacrifice needed to keep the flame alive.

in the time of dark souIs 3, Iothric's family wanted 2 create a child so strong they'd be the perfect person to link the flame. but they couldn't have a child like that naturally, so they resorted to 'unspeakable means' and that's all the game tells u gjfjsk. i'm not sure if i wanna know what they did BUT as a result of it, Iothric was born cursed. he was supposed 2 be a champion so strong he could link the fire but ALAS he was weak nd had v frail health, nd he didn't grow much, as an adult he could still wear his swaddling as robes, nd it's the only thing he's ever worn. why didn't nyall giv this boy some fuckign CLOTHES ffs.

but also can i gush a bit 🥺🥺 pls lookit him i think he's v cute despite his resting bitch face gjfjsk. also he looks like he rly needs a nap.. ME TOO c'mere let's snuggle.

nd pls note i say "despite" him always lookin grumpy but i lov that abt him gjfjdk

nd i'm sure nyall hav heard me talk abt his voice lots nd how much i adore it gjdjk. so pwease listen 2 him if u haven't his voice is SO preddy i am in lov nd i swoon whenever i hear it gjfjdk

NYWAYS !! Iothric has an older brother named Iorian !! the game never states why, but he decided to share Iothric's curse. a lot of ppl think it was 2 help ease his suffering which is 🥺🥺🥺 but nyways !! the curse left Iorian mute and unable to stand, nd their souls were nearly inseparable bc of the curse; they could nearly meld together. but it's said they're also nearly inseparable in kinship !! which u can tell bc Iorian obviously cares a lot fr Iothric nd givs up everything in order 2 protect him ;w;

eventually Iothric decided he didn't want to link the fire. we don't know exactly why but alas. him doing this sorta makes him the main antagonist of the game?? bc if he just linked the flame none of this shit would be happenin but LISTEN he is not bad ok. i don't blame him fr not wantin 2 do it, he had no say in it he was destined to from birth :(( it's v understandable that he doesn't wanna burn esp when ppl are tryna force him to fjdjsk. nyways him nd Iorian decided to hide far away nd just. wait for the fire to fade.

many ppl have attempted to come and kill them, but ofc they haven't succeeded gjfjsk. the ashen one, the character u play as, has to (( among lotsa other things but i am here 2 talk abt Iothric not the whole story of the game )) find nd kill him. him nd Iorian are the last boss u face before the Final Battle™️. so lemme talk abt their boss fight 👀

when u start off the fight Iothric's way up on his bed where u can't get to him, but this ain't an issue since he doesn't attack gjfjdk. just Iorian does, nd since he can't use his legs Iothric helps by teleporting him around the room !! when u kill Iorian, Iothric teleports down nd revives Iorian !! then he clings onto his back, nd that suggests he's too weak 2 walk :(( nyways during the second part of the fight u still gotta deal w Iorian but now Iothric's on his back shooting magic at u gjfjdk.

a v interesting thing abt that !! he can use RLY powerful magic, if being able 2 bring his brother back from the dead didn't already tell u that gjdksk. nd he does it all w/o a catalyst !! it's not said why he doesn't need one, but it's impressive bc even gods like gwyndoIin need one to cast spells but Iothric can do it w his bare hands just.. bc he wants to i guess JFDJK. either way i'm v proud of u sweetie !! nd remember when i said his soul's intertwined w Iorian's?? yea bc of that Iorian can't truly die unless Iothric does as well, so if u don't kill Iothric he'll just keep reviving his brother gjfjsk. but when Iothric dies Iorian also does immediately :((

there are multiple endings in the game nd in one of em u don't even hav 2 link the fire, but ur still required to kill Iothric nd Iorian?? why?? fr context in the game ur told 2 kill Iothric so u can go link the flame urself since he won't gjdjsk. but if ur not gonna link the fire?? why do i still hav 2 kill them?? i hate u fromsoft fjdjsk neither of them deserve this.

OOH can i talk abt this other thing 👁👁 i've been meaning 2 but never hav gjdjdk. OK SO !!! when i said Iothric was meant 2 be a champion nd all that, he was also expected 2 wield a special platinum sword !! but bc of his poor health he couldn't do that. nyways originally he was supposed 2 wield a scythe !! the sexiest of all weapons 👀

in conclusion...

its fuckign BIG so there's no way he'd be able 2 wield this if he couldn't do the same w that tiny sword gjdjsk but !! i always think how cool it'd be to see him use it in the fight... alas that will never happen gjdjsk 😔😔 NO MATTER i am happy enough seein him cast his pretty magic..

so uh. i think that's it?? unfortunately we do not get 2 know anythin abt him personally ;(( at least we have headcanons gjfjsk i hav many~

i lov my husband SO much he's brought me sm happiness.. nd i hope i can giv him plenty in return ;; he's been thru sm nd he only deserves the best jgdjkd i just want him 2 be happy nd safe :(( i Also lov my big brother Iorian w all my heart nd he Also deserves only the best !! both these boys r so good pls appreciate them

[spine-buster]

Alone, Together | Chapter 28 | Morgan Rielly

A/N: I couldn’t bear to re-live too much of the playoffs so...yeah.  This is the last chapter to deal with them.  We are now moving on to the summer!  Fun and interesting shenanigans ahead!

Lmao wow. So official with ur jacket in the wag group pic. Bet u begged the other wags for a jacket and to be in the pic.

You look really cute in your jacket!  I think you’d look better if you were maybe Steph or Madison’s size though!  Other than that, super cute!

OMG you are honestly the most desperate person in the city of Toronto

pls pls pls how can I become a wag

can u give Auston my number 416 555 0123

So…how’s Scotiabank treating you?

For the love of God, sign up for a yoga class girl.  Pilates.  Start jogging.  Something.  Nothing about your body is flattering.  You can’t tell me Morgan likes all that flab.  You were always a calf but you’ve been a cow since Christmas.

You want to make it seem like you’re ‘part of the group’ of WAGs but we can all tell you’re not.  They include you to be nice but in reality, they probably don’t even speak to you outside of the arena.  To think you are isolating Morgan from his friends and teammates – and for what?  So you can have a WAG jacket one year?  So you can flaunt in front of everyone?  Morgan would be so much better off with someone who doesn’t leech off of him and who doesn’t reek of desperation.  

***

Bee didn’t know how she survived all the way up to game six.  It was a back and forth between the Leafs and the Bruins and she didn’t know how she was going to handle this game, with the Leafs being able to eliminate the Bruins if they won.  The Leafs won game three, even though at 6:15pm that same Monday, it came down that Naz had been suspended for the rest of the series – however long that was.  The boys were angry, but they tried not to let it show.  That Wednesday, they lost 6-4.  Morgan got two assists that night but they still couldn’t capitalize.  In Boston for game five, the Leafs won 2-1, with Morgan getting another assist on Kappy’s goal.  Now, with game six about to start, she was jittery.  She even felt hot in the jacket but couldn’t bear to take it off.

She was praying for an Easter miracle.  

Once everyone settled back into their seats after the singing of the anthems by Martina, her leg couldn’t stop bobbing up and down.  It was Aryne who had to lay her hand on Bee’s thigh to get her to stop.  “Are you nervous or something?” she asked sarcastically.  

“How have you done this for almost ten years?” Bee asked.  “I don’t know if I can handle it.”

“You’re going to be okay.  You get used to it,” Aryne said.  “Besides, this is actually only the fourth time John’s made the playoffs.”

“What?  Really?”

Aryne nodded her head.  “When we went to Sochi it was much more nerve-wracking.  But that’s besides the point.  You need to calm down.”

“So if they win this, they face the Columbus Blue Jackets, because the Blue Jackets swept the Tampa Bay Lightning,” Bee listed off, remembering the look of the bracket in her head.  

“Exactly.”

“Could we beat the Blue Jackets?  Like in a series?”

“In a heartbeat.”

Bee’s chest tightened.  “So…like…we could really do this.”

Aryne nodded her head.  “Really really.  But we can’t think about that right now.  We need to focus on beating the Bruins.”

Morgan opened the scoring.  It happened about ten minutes into the first period, a one timer from the blue line thanks to Willy keeping it in the Bruins zone, and Bee erupted from her seat with the crowd to scream and cheer for him, even high-fiving a man and his son who were seated in front of her.  She looked up at the jumbrotron to see him fist-bumping with the bench before they replayed the goal.  Her heart fluttered in her chest knowing that he had opened the scoring in such a big game, motivating the rest of the team.  

That didn’t last long though.  Brad Marchand scored less than two minutes later, and another goal by Krug ended the first period.  DeBrusk, still playing even though there were rumours that he had a concussion, scored in the second period.  Auston scored in the third period and tried to rally the team to tie it.  Late in the game, Morgan and Jake DeBrusk got into a little…scuffle on the ice, and DeBrusk pushed Morgan’s helmet off.  There was an exchange of words, a little pushing and shoving, and Bee couldn’t bear it.

“PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE!” she screamed at the top of her lungs, surprising even herself at the ferocity and volume of her demand.  She stood up in her seat to watch the aftermath and the replays on the jumbotron.  Surely an opponent pulling off the helmet of another player would result in a penalty?  “WHAT FUCKING BULLSHIT!” she screamed at the top of her lungs again.

“Bee, there are children present,” Aryne grabbed her hand.

“FUCK YOU DEBRUSK!” she shouted one more time before sitting down, huffing and puffing in anger as they showed a replay yet again.  “I guess game two let us all know the Bruins can do whatever the fuck they want and get away with it!” she said loudly, but not as loud as before.  She looked at Aryne.  “Can you believe this?!”

“Yes Bee, it’s game six of the playoffs,” she giggled slightly.  “This is the most I’ve seen you get riled up about hockey ever.  I think Mo needs to start getting more physical more often,” she wiggled her eyebrows.

Bee snorted.  If only Aryne knew.  “I just…nobody’s allowed to touch him.  Nobody.  I’ll deal with them myself if I have to.”

Unfortunately, the Leafs couldn’t capitalize and Brad Marchand scored again.  The final was 4-2.  They’d be going back to Boston.

Another game 7.  

Bee could see the looks on everyone’s faces as the buzzer rang to signal the end of the game.  The girls who had been through this before – Alannah, Lucy, Madison, and others – were not smiling.  At all.  There was a look of worry mixed with dread on their faces.  As fans filed out of the arena, the girls all sat in their places, staring at each other.  Nobody got up – Bee didn’t think anyone had the strength to.  There was always a lot of media after the games, anyway, so there was no point in leaving when the fans did.

Aryne, forever the optimist, saw the look on Bee’s face.  “They can do this, Bee.  I know they can,” she said.  “We need to stay positive.”

“I know they can.  The question is if they will,” Bee mused.  “What if they get those awful referees from game two again?”

“They won’t.  The NHL will never let them officiate another game again, they were so bad.  We need to stay positive.  They have all the tools they need.  They can beat the Bruins.”

Bee wished she could be as positive.

***

Morgan wasn’t a man of many words when he came out of the locker room.  He gave Bee a kiss and said goodbye to everyone before they descended down to the parking garage.  Rocco and Clarette had invited them over for an Easter dinner, and that’s where they were supposed to be headed.  But Bee could see the dejected look on Morgan’s face and the bags under his eyes.  She knew he would probably rather just go home.  She knew he was tired, aching, that he now had a flight to catch tomorrow to go into enemy territory.  

As they got into the car, she looked over at him and put her hand over his.  “I can call Clarette and tell her you’re tired if you want to go home,” Bee said softly.  “They’ve been watching.  They’ll understand.”

“Why would you do that?”

“Morgan, come on,” she said.  “If you want to just go home we can go home.  Or I can take the subway up myself and you can go and rest.”

“No no no,” he said, flipping over his hand to hold hers and bring it to his lips to kiss.  “We promised them we’d be there for Easter dinner.  Clarette’s probably made four different courses.  We’re going.  I’m okay.”

“Morgan.”

“Briony, I want to take my mind off of hockey right now,” he said, his voice sombre, firm, and resolved.  “I want to be around family.”

She couldn’t protest.  Not when she heard the tone of his voice, not as he cradled her hand in his against his chest, not as he looked at her with his blue eyes.  She couldn’t do it.  “Promise me you’ll tell me you want to go the second you want to?  Don’t feel obligated to stay longer.”

“I will Bumblebee.  I promise,” he said, kissing her hand one last time before pulling out of the parking spot.

When they arrived, it was Rocco who opened the door to greet them.  “Mr. Goal Scorer tonight!” he beamed as he hugged Morgan.  “Great goal tonight!”

“Thank you,” Morgan smiled.

“And you!” Rocco turned his attention to Bee.  “That jacket looks great!”  She spun around so he could see the giant Maple Leafs logo on the back and he oohed and awed at it.  “Can I buy one too?”

Bee giggled as she showed him the ‘Rielly’ patch on her arm.  “You have to start dating Morgan to get one.”

“He’s handsome.  That could happen.”

They broke out into a fit of laughter as Sarah Jessica Barker came running towards them, bringing with her Angie, Mason, and Joshua.  Morgan bent down to pet her and coo at her while Angie, Mason, and Josh looked on with amused expressions on their faces.  “Sorry about the game,” Angie said as Sarah Jessica Barker had enough of Morgan and moved on to Bee.  

“What are we having for dinner?” Morgan asked.  His way of letting her know he didn’t want to talk about it.  Angie got the hint.  So did everyone else.  

“We’re Italian.  We have lamb on Easter,” Rocco informed him.

“We’re also French-Canadian,” Clarette piped up from the kitchen.  Morgan couldn’t help but laugh.  “We are also French-Canadian and have butter tarts to offset the Italian lamb.”

“That’s what I like to hear, Clarette!  Dessert!” Morgan called out to her as she appeared from the kitchen.  “I’m sorry we had to push this back so late because of me.”

“Late?  What late?  It’s barely 7.  Italians have dinner at 9pm,” she said, side-eyeing her husband.  “But everything is ready, so everyone should go sit at the table.”

***

pls tell ur boyfriend the next game is kind of important and if he could step it up that would be nice

lemme guess…ur going to boston on mo’s dime for game 7?  U have a job yet u never work. So lazy.

No matter how hard you try you will never be as pretty as Steph or Cassie.  Don’t know why you think you are.  Don’t bother.  

You know all the other girls are talking about you behind your back, right?  Word on the street is you’re the most desperate social climber ever, and when the playoffs are over, you’ll be gone too.  On to the next hockey player, slut.

***

Bee didn’t have anymore nail polish on.  She had peeled off her shellac from sheer anxiety.  Going into the second period, the Bruins were up 2-0, and then John had scored thanks to an assist from Tyler.  Going into the third, it was 2-1.  The boys could do this.  They could do this.  They could do this.

Bee decided against getting together with any of the girls.  She was too nervous and she didn’t want any of them to see just how worried, panicky, and jumpy she was.  She was alone in the apartment and, honestly, right now, she preferred it that way.  She could yell at the TV without anyone looking at her.  She could yell stupid stuff, stuff that probably didn’t even make sense, and nobody would say anything.  She could cry in peace if she wanted to.  She also knew that, regardless of the outcome, the boys would be on a flight after the game, coming home in the middle of the night.  She wanted to be home for Morgan.  Regardless of the outcome.

When the third period started Bee was optimistic.  But less than three minutes in, Sean Kuraly scored.  3-1.  The boys could still do this.  They could come back.

Then Charlie Coyle scored near the end.  4-1.  Bee’s chest tightened.  That was what the score was during that awful game seven in 2013 before the Bruins came back.  Maybe the boys could do the same, with much, much less time.

Patrice Bergeron.  An empty-netter.  5-1.  The Bruins fans went wild.  A waterfall of tears streamed down Bee’s cheeks.

The Toronto Maple Leafs had been eliminated from the playoffs.

Despite her sadness and despite her pain, she kept the TV on.  The stupid panellists with their stupid opinions provided background noise for her tears, but she didn’t listen to anything they had to say.  Why would she when they were trashing Fred, saying he was incapable of being a “game seven goalie”, whatever the fuck that meant, when just two weeks earlier they were calling him the best goaltender in the world?  Why would she when all they did was go over every single little thing the Leafs did wrong?  Why would she listen to them completely tear apart and break down a team they all relied on for their hefty paycheques?  She wasn’t stupid – she knew how sports media worked.  She knew the Leafs provided rating and that their ratings were through the roof because of this – they’d probably be getting some nice bonus cheques.  They were all feckless – all of them.  They changed their opinions on the fly, whenever it suited them, whenever it got them more ratings and more viewers who ended up adopting their shit opinions.  ‘Experts my ass’ Bee thought.  Especially that Nik Kypreos guy.  What an idiot.

And then Morgan appeared on the screen.

She wanted to scream.  Were they actually interviewing him right now?  Really?!  Not even two minutes after the end of the game and they had paraded him out of the locker room into some hallway to answer asinine questions about another heartbreaking game seven?  ‘LET THEM GRIEVE!’ she wanted to shout.  ‘LET THEM FUCKING GRIEVE!’  But no.  Apparently that was impossible.  They wanted every sound bite they could get just so they could talk about it for fifteen minutes afterwards.  Because they Leafs were money.  That’s all they were to these people – sound bites and ratings and money.  They weren’t just hockey players dejected after a loss; they weren’t men who put everything they had into the game, into the entire series, into the entire season; worse yet, they weren’t human beings with complex emotions who didn’t want microphones and cameras shoved in their faces as they dealt with the insurmountable fact that they had let an entire city down.  Money.

She looked at him and how dejected he looked, how heavy his breathing was underneath all his gear.  She wanted to shatter every plate in their kitchen against a wall in anger.  When he was finally released and went back to the locker room, she shed more tears.  God knows how many reporters would be waiting for them in there, too.

She just wanted him home.  God, all she wanted was for him to come home.

***

When Bee heard the door unlock at almost 2am, she jumped off the couch but stood stoic in her place.  She watched as Morgan pushed open the door, lugging himself into his apartment, letting the door close behind him.  The first thing he looked for was her.  She was all he wanted to see.

“Baby…” she mumbled, running over to him.  “Baby, baby, come here.”

She grabbed on and attached herself to him like he was going to float away.  He immediately wrapped his arms around her, burying his face into her neck.  He lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around him tightly.  Almost absent-mindedly, he walked them over to their bedroom before collapsing on the bed.  He didn’t let go.  She felt tears on her neck as they lay there, wrapped into each other, and she began running her fingers through his hair and playing with the tufts of hair at the base of his neck, knowing it was soothing for him.  It was all she could do; all she knew she could do.  There wasn’t anything she could say that would make him feel better.  There were no words for this.  No words besides “I love you,” which she whispered to him over and over again, for however long she needed to.

***

“We couldn’t do it.”

That’s what Morgan kept repeating.  

“We couldn’t do it.”

Bee couldn’t rewrite history.  “You couldn’t do it now.  But you can and you will.  One day.”  It was all she could offer.

“We couldn’t do it.”

***

Bee had pre-emptively taken the day off.  She didn’t need to worry about work and, quite frankly, didn’t exactly want to right now.  She got a text from Mark early that morning.  Tell Morgan we were rooting for him all the way.  We’re proud of him.  He’s one of the only guys who showed up to play the game the entire series.

Bee read the text out to him.  He said nothing.

***

Bee only left the bed to make him breakfast – some Greek yogurt with an organic granola mix and some fresh raspberries and sliced bananas.  When she brought it to him, still in bed, she saw he was in and out of sleep.  She could only imagine he was trying to survive on his last legs of energy by this point.  She placed the bowl on the side table before helping him out of his clothes so he could at least be comfortable in his sleep.  He moved around absent-mindedly to help her, but she knew he wasn’t there.  He probably thought he was hallucinating.  When she was finished, she cupped his face in the palm of her hand gently.  She’d put the granola mix in the fridge to eat later.  

“Y’know what?” he mumbled out suddenly, barely audible or understandable through his fatigue, his eyes cracking open only slightly to look at her.

“What?”

“I wanna take care’f you.”

Bee didn’t understand what he meant.  She thought for sure he was dreaming already and in some form of sleep paralysis or lucid dreaming.  “What are you talking about?”

“I wanna give you s’much you c’n quit your job n’do s’mthin’ you really love.  Cause I love you.”

Bee was completely still as the words escaped his mouth.  Before she could come back to, or say anything, she heard his soft snores.

***

It was a few days until Morgan returned to his normal self.  Well, semi-normal.  

The locker clear out was scheduled for Saturday, April 27th, and because they were leeches who didn’t know when to stop sucking the life out of something, the media was expected there.  Mike Babcock would hold a press conference.  The summer rumour mill began of who was staying and who was not; who was going to earn these many millions here and who was going to earn those many millions somewhere else.  Morgan spoke to the media, as he always did.  Off-camera they asked about what he would get up to the entire summer over in Vancouver, since naturally he’d go home.  ‘Lots of golfing, probably,’ he’d answered.  ‘Dad’s birthday at the beginning of June.  Long walks with Maggie where she gets to swim – she loved swimming.  She’s queen of the ocean, too.  Lots of poolside days.  Good wine on the deck.  Back to Toronto for the Pride Parade.  Fishing trips too, as always.  But mostly just stick around home.’

Of course Morgan would go home.  He deserved more than anybody to go home to his family, to take in the fresh air of the B.C. coast and rejuvenate himself.  He deserved to relax; to kick his feet up and sleep with Maggie in his lap; to take the boat out to Gibsons for oysters or to chase pods of whales again.  He deserved to go fishing.  Go golfing.  Do anything he wanted to do.  Isolate himself from the outside world, from hockey.  Live through summer on his rules, how he wanted to.  

She just wondered how their life in Toronto factored into that.

It was a long flight, from Toronto to Vancouver, and Morgan was meant to relax.  She didn’t want him to feel obligated to do anything he didn’t want to do.  They had events that they needed to attend together, sure – like Zach’s wedding at the end of June – but she wondered how all that would factor into him taking time for himself.  She knew they would work it out, like they always did, but it was four months of summer that needed to be accounted for and planned.  There was only so much time she could take off at work – they both knew that.  So she’d have to stay in Toronto.  She wondered if his schedule would be like how she assumed last summer’s was, when she met him.  A bit of time here, a bit of time there, a bit of time anywhere he wanted to be.  

When the locker clean out was all said and done, Bee and Morgan sat together in their apartment, her legs draped over his.  It was all she thought about on the way home.  Since the reporter had asked the question.  “What are we going to do this summer?”

“Well, we have Zach’s wedding and--”

“You deserve to go home,” Bee blurted out.  She was trying desperately not to let her tears fall.  Being without him for long stretches of time was going to be hard – just like it was during the season – but he needed it more than anything.  “You deserve to go home and relax for a bit.  You’ve had a tough year outside of hockey, too.”

She watched as his brows furrowed at her words.  “What was so tough outside of hockey?” he asked.

“Me.  The break-in.  My mom dying.  You didn’t deserve to have to deal with that and--”

He cut her off by giving her a kiss.  “Do you mean outside of hockey, when I met the love of my life?”

She couldn’t handle his words.  The tears escaped her slowly, and immediately she wiped them away with the backs of her hands.  Morgan leaned forward again, capturing her lips in another kiss, and soon, they couldn’t tear themselves away from each other.  It was only when they had to break for air that he spoke again.  “I am going to go home, Briony.  But only for a bit.  I’ll be back and forth, but it’ll be okay.”

“You need to take this time to relax,” she stressed, putting her hand on his chest.  “You can’t go back and forth all the time.  This is your time off.”

“I’ll be fine.  It’s nothing that I’m not used to,” he said.  “Besides, you know I can’t go too long without seeing you.”

She sighed again.  “I can’t go too long without seeing you either.  But your priority shouldn’t be me, your priority should be yourself.”

“Hey, you’re always my priority,” he said, grabbing hold on her hand on his chest.  “You’re my home now too, Bumblebee.  Don’t you ever forget it.”

She internalized his words as much as she could.  You’re my home now too, Briony.  She never thought she’d hear those words – that someone would consider her home.  But of course Morgan did, and Morgan was the one to say it about her.  And even though she knew that in her close future she’d be spending more time than she liked alone, she knew that once he came back to her, they’d go back to being themselves, together.  “Let’s…let’s take out our calendars.”

“Bumblebee.”

“I want to see when you’ll be gone.  I know you’re out in PEI with Dion an the Boys and Girls Club, and I know--”

“Bumblebee--”

“Please Morgan.  Just take out your calendar.  For me.”

He didn’t fight it.  He moved to take his phone out of his pocket and he opened the calendar.  “I’m going to see if I can catch a flight to Vancouver mid-week, okay?  It can give us a couple of more days together,” he said.  Bee nodded her head, cuddling more into him so she could lay her head on his chest, just below his shoulder.  “We don’t have much in May.  I know you have Alannah’s bachelorette party on the 11th but it’s not like I need to come to that.  I can be back in town for the long weekend the following week and stay for a while.  But then I want to be back home for dad’s birthday.  I want to take him golfing.  We always go golfing for his birthday.”

“Of course,” Bee said.  She couldn’t help but smile slightly.  “Back and forth, back and forth – it’s gonna be like hockey didn’t even stop.”

“What did I tell you?” he smirked, giving her a quick kiss.  “I’m gonna miss your cooking.”

“I’m gonna miss you eating all my cooking,” she said.  “The apartment is going to feel so empty with you gone.”

“You should get a gerbil.”

She snorted as he wiggled his eyebrows at her.  “Don’t tempt me, Morgan Rielly.  You’ll come back in May and this place will be a literal zoo.”

“If that’s what you want that’s fine by me,” he mumbled, leaning in to kiss her again, and again, and again.  Eventually, he pulled her on to his lap and let his hands wander underneath her shirt.  “I’m gonna miss this most,” he mumbled against her lips.

“Me too,” she agreed, her hands cupping his face so she could look at him.  He had shaved off his playoff beard, and there was only stubble now.  She ran her thumbs along his jawline.  “Gonna miss waking up to those baby blues every morning.”

He gave her another kiss.  “Gonna miss waking up with my face between your thighs.”

A smile broke out on her face.  “You’re a perv.”

“Only for you.”

***

Tick tock tick tock…who is the next hockey player you’re gonna fuck for relevancy?

I bet ur gonna try to get with auston next.  Or fred.  You’re such a slut

Now is your chance to turn into a hot girl for hot girl summer.  Join a gym ffs!!!!!!!!!!

[thiswasinevitableid]

Moonlit Walk

Prompt for the 19th was: “If you thought you were safe, you thought wrong.” Beware, this prompt is Not Suitable For your Workplace.

“If you thought you were safe, you thought wrong.”

Stern turns to look at the man behind him. His date is smiling, all teeth.

Sharp teeth. 

“Remember I said how handsome you look in the moonlight?” The man is shifting, changing, and Stern gazes up at the full moon. 

“Shit. Alright, don’t panic, I’m sure there’s a way we can get you somewhere where you can’t hurt anyone or yourself.” 

“Aw, it’s cute that you think this is a warning so you can try to save yourself. Hate to break it to you, Joseph, but we didn’t come all the way out here to get cozy. But I meant what I said; You really do look like a snack.” It’s coming out as more of a growl now, and the smile is staying put.

“You can’t, can’t be serious.” He’s already trying to picture his escape route.

“Dead serious. But” he drags his claws down a tree-trunk, nonchalantly, “I’ll give you a sixty second head start. It’ll be more fun that way. One-”

Stern is running before the syllable leaves his mouth. Even as it pounds in his ears, his heart sinks as he notices he’s completely lost.

Not nearly far enough behind him, there’s a howl. 

This was not how this night was supposed to go.

He’s been in the sleepy California town of Kepler, researching his newest book of cryptid sightings, for two months. Dating pools are already small in towns like Kepler, even more so when you’re gay. So imagine his pleasure when another visitor approached him a few days ago and asked if he’d like to go on a date. He was charming, and handsome, and Stern was curious and a little bit horny and figured the worst that would happen was some disappointing sex. 

They’d had dinner in the lodge where Stern was (is) staying, and he’s had a perfectly decent time. His date wasn’t an amazing conversationalist, but he was pleasant enough, and seemed very into Stern. 

The only odd moment had come when, while his date was in the bathroom, the bartender (and cook) came over to personally drop off his drink. 

“You doing okay?”

“Yes, why?”

“That guy’s not giving you any trouble?”

“Not in the slightest.”

“Huh. Well, uh, lemme know if that changes, okay?”

Now, as he ducks and weaves through the woods, Stern replays that conversation. Wishes he’s paid more attention to what, in retrospect, may have been a warning. Wishes he’d paid attention to their path in the forest, rather than to the many complimentary things his date had said to him. 

How does that poem go?

And now, dear little children, who may this story read,

To idle, silly, flattering words, I pray you ne’er give heed;

Unto an evil counselor close heart, and ear, and eye,

And take a lesson from this tale of the Spider and the-

“Fuck” he hisses as he comes to a stop at the edge of a sheer rock face. Cracking branches and panting growls are terrifyingly close. Weighing his options, he grabs the largest stick he can swing; if flight won’t save him, maybe fight will. 

“Ooh, bad luck. Guess you’re not as sharp as I thought.” His date lurches through the trees towards him. 

“I’m not helpless either. Leave me alone.” 

“Oh yeah, this is gonna be fun” the monster crouches, ready to spring, when a cacophony of snapping branches comes from Sterns left. 

“You heard him. Beat it.” Rumbles a voice.

The werewolf must be able to see better in the dark than Stern, because he scoffs “who’s gonna make me, Squatch-boy?”

It’s only when the newcomer steps into the light that Stern sees him too. 

Yeah, that’s definitely a Bigfoot. 

“Look, man, you’re already in pretty serious trouble. Don’t make me kick your ass on top of it.” 

The werewolf snarls and launches himself at the cryptid, who dives to the side and comes up with what appears to be half a dead tree. He swings, sending the lycanthrope flying. 

Unfortunately, he flies Sterns way and lands too close for comfort. 

“I’m gonna tear you apart youOW!” 

Stern hits him with the stick again for good measure, giving Bigfoot time to cross the distance between them and haul the creature into an extremely violent bear-hug. When he throws the wolf to the ground this time, he stays down for a twenty count before stumbling up and limping towards the treeline. 

“Fine, asshole, you eat him! Fuck that hurt.” It glares at them once before skulking off into the darkness. 

At the implication that Bigfoot sees him as prey, Sterns panic gives an encore. He knows of no accounts suggesting that Bigfoot or cryptids of his kind eat people. But until tonight, Stern didn’t know of any credible accounts of the existence of werewolves, either. 

Bigfoot turns to look at him and he raises his stick.

The cryptid holds up his hands, “Whoa, hey, I’m not gonna eat you. That guy’s just being a dick.”

“You’ll forgive me for not being inclined to believe you right now.”

“I swear, I’m mostly harmless.” He kneels, then sits down on the forest floor. 

“You are almost two feet taller than me, you have fangs, and you just beat up a werewolf.”

“.....Yeah okay I see your point. Uh” he pats around his body, looking for something, “here, maybe this’ll help.” He slips a woven bracelet on his wrist, and then there’s no more Bigfoot. 

Just a bartender. 

“Barclay?” 

The other man waves sheepishly, “Hey. Uh, this making you feel better?”

“It’s mainly increasing my confusion.”

Barclay scratches the back of his neck, “There’s more than I can really explain right now, especially without checking with some other people first. The main thing is what you already saw; there’s monsters running around, and they can look like humans.”

“There’s more than just the two of you?”

“Lots more. Most of us are really chill. I haven’t seen that guy before, so I think he might have either just come through from our home or be passing through from another town. Either way, he’s the only werewolf I’ve ever seen who’d pull a stunt like this.”

“There are other werewolves?” Stern cautiously lays the stick down. 

“Most of them are having a chess club meeting tonight.” Barclay shrugs. 

Stern slowly settles onto the ground, heart rate returning to normal, “That’s why you asked me about him, isn’t it?’

“I wasn’t sure if he was what I thought, because I hadn’t seen him before. I just got a kinda predatory vibe off of him. When I saw you two heading out here I got suspicious and followed you. After letting Mama know my hunch.”

Stern nods, beginning to understand. Mama runs the lodge, and if anyone in town looks prepared to handle a monster, it’s her. 

“Do you wanna continue this conversation back at the lodge?”

“Yes, please.” Stern ought to stand up, but the idea of doing so sounds exhausting. Barclay gets up, walks the several feet between them and holds out his hand. Stern takes it, gratefully.

“Is the lodge close? I’m so goddamn turned around, I feel like such a fool for not even paying enough attention to know where I am in relation town.”

“He turned you around on purpose.”

“By stroking my ego with nice words, and I fell for it.” Stern mutters.

“Try not to beat yourself up, okay?” Barclay rests his free hand on his shoulder. 

“I’ll do my best.”

They start back through the trees, Barclay keeping a protective arm around the shorter man. 

“You’re taking me being Bigfoot pretty well.”

“Honestly, I just processed so much unexpected information in such a short time that I’m still sorting through all my feelings.”

“...Are you trying to decide whether to ask me for help with you research?”

Stern looks over at him, finds a wry, sweet smile heading his direction. 

“Perhaps.”

“Gotta buy me a drink first.”

“Barclay, you are the one serving them. You can have one for free whenever you want.”

“Not from a cute guy I can’t.”

Sterns’ cheeks heat up at the same time his stomach twists, compliments in the dark woods now linked to danger in his brain. Barclay notices the reaction, clears his throat. 

“Did you get a chance to finish that book I gave you?”

“It was spectacular, I stayed up all night a few days ago to read it. I meant to give it back, but I’ve been swamped with research just like you’ve been swamped with customers.”

“Really has been hectic the last few days. Think we got written up somewhere again.”

“Does that happen often?” Stern picks his way over a fallen log, Barclay offering a hand to steady him.

“Every now and then Sunset or somesuch writes about Kepler as a nice weekend vacation spot. Lodge gets mentioned every time, usually as a place to eat.”

“As it should. You’re an amazing chef, Barclay.”

It’s a pity the moonlight washes the world out; he’s fairly certain Barclay is blushing.

When the lodge comes into view, a figure wearing a wide-brimmed hat approaches them, coalescing into the shape of Duck Newton, local ranger. 

“Mama wanted me to let you both know that she’s taken care of the issue.” 

Barclay groans, “she didn’t kill him, did she?”

“Nope, just put the fear of god into him and chased him across the border into the next county in her pick-up. Accordin to ‘Drid, no futures of him comin back.”

“That’s...good?” Stern isn’t quite sure how Duck’s tall, gangly husband can be so sure. 

“Whelp, I better be headin home. Evenin you two, glad you didn’t get eaten.” He tips his hat and heads off towards the parking lot. 

Stern rubs his arms, nerves still refusing to quiet entirely. 

“Kitchen’s closed, but I got a little kitchenette in my room, could make you some tea. Uh, if you want.”

“That would be nice, thank you.”

Soon he’s seated on Barclays green, plaid bed-spread as the larger man putters around the small stove. Barclay keeps up a quiet, consistent chatter, seeming to understand that Stern is craving the reassurance of a friendly, familiar voice. 

“...Anyway, it turns out it’s even harder than you’d think to get caramel syrup out of your beard.”

Stern laughs at the image, reaches for the mug Barclay offers him. The trouble is, he can’t make his hands grab it. It nearly drops on the floor, but Barclay cups his hands around Sterns to keep them steady,

“Everything okay?”

“I, it’s like my limbs are numb but full of little, buzzing bugs all at once and I can’t make them grip anything. It’s an adrenaline reaction I get some time.”

“Is there a way I can help?” The question is gentle, earnest, Barclay staring down at him with those deep brown eyes. Stern glances down, trying to ignore the lewd thoughts flooding his head at Barclays offer. Instead he counts the various scars on Barclays hands, wonders which are remnants of kitchen incidents and which are reminders of monster battles. 

In spite of this distraction, his mind offers up thoughts. Thoughts of how Barclay brings him his coffee with just the right amount of cream and sugar already added, while all the other guests have to add theirs at the table.  How more than a few nights, he’s kept Stern company while he pours over notes and researches leads, busying himself with looking over recipes or cleaning the bar. 

Thoughts of how more than once, Barclay’s given Stern a shy once-over, a thing he’d previously never thought possible. How the few times the bartender complimented him, Stern glowed for hours afterwards. 

He looks back up, finds the other man waiting on his answer.

It doesn’t take much, merely a soft tug on Barclays hands, to bring him close enough for a kiss. He gets surprised, short moan in response, pulls back to smile at him. 

“I don’t know about you, Barclay, but I can think of some far more enjoyable ways to burn off adrenaline than sipping tea.”

“Got that right. And I’m happy to do them, as long as you promise me you’re not doing this because you think it’s something you owe me.”

“I’m not.” 

Barclay takes the mug from Sterns hands, sets it down on the bedside table calmly. 

Then he makes a surprisingly graceful hop-flop onto the bed, and pulls Stern on top of him. The fire in Sterns system is instantaneous, and he frantically kisses Barclay while tugging at his shirt and grinding against him. When the shirt proves too difficult, he goes for Barclays belt, but the other man grabs both his hands with one of his own, grips his hip to keep him still with little effort (good lord he is strong).

“Much as I appreciate the thought, babe, I wanna make it all about getting you off right now. You’ve had a hard night. Will you let me make you feel good?”

Stern cups his face and kisses him hard and happy, nodding as best he can.

“Lay back and get comfy.”

Stern tears his shirt off like it’s on fire, gives his slacks the same treatment. Barclay chuckles, undoes his flannel and drops it on the floor. Then he kneels down, grabs Sterns ankles and slides him down to the edge of the bed, eases his underwear off once he’s there. Then hooks Sterns legs over his shoulders, nuzzles his inner thighs with a low, rumbling purr.

“Want me to suck your dick?”

“Oh lord yes, please, yesYESohhhhh.” His heels dig into Barclays back at the first firm swipe of his tongue. Barclay huffs out warm, laughing breath against him before continuing to circle and swirl along his folds, Stern whimpering whenever his tongue teases at his dick. The room steadily fills with his moans, the odd laugh when Barclays beard tickles his skin, and the other mans panting, pleased purr. 

Barclay pulls back just a little, kissing Sterns’ hips and thighs as he groans, “fuck, love doing this to you, love hearing you moan baby, god, wanna make you feel so good.”

“You’re doing, ah, so well, oh lord Barclay please don’t stop.”

“Not planning to.” Is all he hears before Barclay dives back down, moaning around his cock like it’s the best thing he’s ever tasted. The noise rumbling out of him is no longer a purr, it’s a growl, Barclays ministrations becoming messier, more animalistic, with every second. Stern is matching his enthusiasm , no longer content to lay back and be lavished with pleasure. Instead he chases it, grinding against Barclays face, which only serves to make the man on the floor growl louder. 

“That’s so good, you’re so good, ohlordfuck” he grips that endearingly shaggy hair, “right there, please right thererighttherrerightthereOHhhhh.” His eyes shut as his orgasm floods him, and a comforting pressure registers on his thigh as Barclay rests his chin against it to watch him come. 

“Better?”

“Yes. Would, would you like to uh, not be on the floor.” He gestures weakly at the bed, hoping Barclay gets the gist.

He does, climbing onto the mattress and rolling Stern into his arms. 

“Give me a moment and I can re-” he yawns, the long-awaited crash finally hitting him, “-ciprocate.”

“Don’t worry about it, okay babe?”

“But you’re clearly turned on. I’m fairly certain I felt you trying to hump the side of the bed while you were down there.”

“I mean yeah, because you’re real fucking hot and I like doing that. But you’re already going limp and sleepy on me.” He lifts Sterns hand, which thwaps back onto the bed because he doesn’t have the energy to even think about keeping it up.

“Suppose you’re right. And you’re very comfortable.” 

“If you want, tomorrow you can nap on me while I’m Bigfoot.”

“I’d” another yawn “like that.” Then a rather ridiculous thought occurs to him and he begins laughing “I never need to work a day in my life again. I’m just going to sell my story to the National Enquirer for a million dollars.”

Barclay belly-laughs, cuddling Stern closer, “Go to sleep, you goofball.”

“Won’t be calling me that when my feature, ‘Bigfoot is real and he sucked my dick’ goes viral.”

“You can only write that if I get a cut.”

Stern blinks sleepily up at him, kisses the goofy smile spreading across his face, “deal.”