#i refuse to let people push me out with baseless claims !!!

[griimhilde-a]

if you know, you know.

———       a response to those who refuse to move on.

EDIT: after some encouragement and realizing that, while i tried to be respectful and private about this situation, i was not given the same treatment, i’ve decided to be upfront and filterless. here is a link to my page of receipts that i did not provide in this post. 

i would like to point out that when i made the DNI, it was buried and sandwiched in my super long rules purposely so that it wasn’t explicitly visible and drawing attention. it was specifically put there for mutuals to understand my boundaries for the new blog, and as soon as i moved blogs, my guidelines underwent heavy reconstruction and the DNI section was removed overall ( i don’t like DNIs for myself ), as well as on this blog. all statements made in the DNI were what i felt to be true and based off of not only my experiences, but others’ as well, backed up with evidence i have saved that i didn’t feel the need to provide because it wasn’t meant to be a big deal, but i also felt i needed to explain why this person was on a DNI and that it wasn’t done out of malicious intent. again, if something sounds bad it is because “bad” things were done and i can’t control that.

reading the call-out had me ( and others ) confused on where it was i had bullied her, when i had her blocked since november, where it was i had manipulated her, and so forth. i’m always wanting to be a better person, so i was extremely confused on where i had done anything wrong. i also didn’t appreciate my new blog url being attached to it as it had nothing to do with it and i was trying to move forward, and it read very much like an attempt to blacklist. despite everything, i never wanted it to be a spectacle. the pinned, public call-out by this person doesn’t read to me as someone wanting to move on, but wanting to drag things further. this is not a call-out post, this is me defending myself. i will not name drop. if you know who this is about, i ask you just read this to understand the full story. 

this is going to be a long boi ( i really tried to keep it short but alkfjdklfksldf nope ). i would also like to apologize for any dryness here, but i am aiming to just state facts as they are. it feels    ----    ridiculous writing this all out because it’s something that could and should have been handled privately. but, here we go !!

everything on the DNI is true. i will not post or reveal the sources because one, they are not my stories to tell, and two, i am not going to give her the excuse to bother them. they deserve to be safe, and i am walking proof of what happens when you speak out against someone like her. if i have to bear that burden, then so be it. 

it stopped being about “just a url” a long time ago. it became more about how i was treated in that interaction, and how i was continued to be treated afterwards. not to mention the increasing tension within the rpc and having to second-guess whether or not i was truly wanted. it was about how it was affecting those around me, my time in a hobby i love, and my mental health. the amount of times a mutual has tagged me by accident when they meant to tag her is insane. it most definitely did not feel good !!! if that kept happening, it was a problem. i also had to shut off the anon feature because of the amount of anons i was receiving. some had good intentions, but others had resorted to hate. 

regarding the messages on discord --- i stand by them. i thought if you were friends with someone on discord and have previously talked over time, it was okay to message, otherwise what was the point of discord? i didn't realize it would make her uncomfortable to do so, and i’m more careful about how i approach people now !!! 

regarding the messages: there was no change in tone other than that i grew exhausted and extremely anxious ( shaking !!! palms sweaty !!! knees weak !!!! mom’s spaghetti !!! ) and wasn’t in the proper mindset to sound happy while i was being invalidated to my face. i have even apologized there if i came off as mean. i don’t “present myself” in a way. that’s just how i talk, i prefer communicating one-on-one and i try to alleviate tension that arises no matter what because these types of conversations aren’t always a walk in the park. i wanted things to be good and not stressful for all parties involved. i’m sorry my tone came off as insincere. after being in desc rpc for a year, i was a little surprised seeing a near-identical url so i think it was fair for me to message her about it. she made the decision use it, and i was allowed to react. it was said misspellings in urls made her anxious so i wanted to help and i was shot down and vilified, essentially told i made her feel unsafe and shouldn’t have messaged. if it wasn’t okay to claim i felt “unsafe” and “paranoid”, why was it okay for her to claim the same based on a choice she made herself, but not me to feel anxious about those choices? 

i have never told a blog to block her. i have never initiated conversation about her, nor have i spoken negatively about her as a person. ever. i have, in fact, even stated that i didn’t want anyone blocking and that it would be okay to interact. here’s one example after i was approached about her. i cannot control what other people do.

hardblocking her on my end was to avoid seeing her on dash as much as possible. 

i am allowed to softblock / unfollow people who interact with her after months of trying to be okay with it. what kickstarted this process was someone i thought was a close friend had dropped me and suddenly i realized i didn’t need to sacrifice my comfort for the sake of keeping a mutual. if they could do it, so could i. while i adore the descendants rpc, the rpc is not a family, we’re not obligated to interact IC or be mutuals with every single person in the rpc. it’s not causing a rift when we don’t interact on dash. i have even emphasized that i would love to stay in contact via discord and write there if possible !! why am i being vilified for trying to make my blog a safe space for me?

regarding the “vagues”: they were all responses. a mutual wrote the post, i reblogged it, my tags were in response to the post ( said mutual’s url wasn’t even blocked out so ... ). if it felt like a vague, i can’t control that. the meaning behind the url post was circulating on dash, i didn’t see any vaguing in it other than me recounting my process of choosing this url, which was true ( was i not allowed to participate?? ). the shrek meme was in response to a public dash event ( which i originally thought was a joke ) that had received copious amounts of criticism for. it wasn’t a vague and it was explicit on what it was referring to, it was meant to be silly dash commentary, nothing deep. 

this is in my rules but i have explicitly stated that my headcanons about my characters are not a vague if they differ from yours. the talk about hair styles was actually initiated in a conversation with my friends in private. it had absolutely nothing to do with her. if it sounded like a drag, i encourage everyone to look at how i’ve “dragged” many other things including the original outfits for descendants, evie thinking mermaid dresses are ugly, evie not liking wine, and so forth. my portrayal of evie =/= other portrayals of evie. while she may never do so-and-so, it doesn’t make it wrong for another portrayal to do it. ( why was my blog being kept tabs on and compared with, in the first place? that’s not duplicate friendly ).

regarding sex week: i've stated it was an inappropriate event because the descendants rpc had been heavily criticized for smutting and felt it wasn't the best response, nor was it the best way to promote sex positivity. it was insanely uncomfortable to witness, as someone in this rpc. it doesn’t matter if the people or the muses involved were adults, i would still call it inappropriate had it happened in any other rpc. it wasn’t a “block and move on” situation. i’m also allowed to defend myself because i didn’t want to be associated with something she posted. i didn’t want it tied to my url. i would like to clarify that when i said "embarrassing" in the responses under that anon, it was directed at the anon for misreading the url, nobody else. ostracizing occurred when the descendants rpc was being added to DNIs because of sex week / smutting, which was posted by this person ( if you post it, you start it. simple ). i had been blocked simply because i am a descendants blog and that had never happened before. 

i was also notified that people uninvolved with this have been namedropping me on dash in an attempt to have me “written off” ( their words, not mine ) because my rules stated that i was open to exploring evie’s sexuality. below is a screenshot of my rule regarding smut. i deleted the rules page from this blog when i moved so i snatched it from my other canon descendants blog that i reuse on all blogs. the second is my elaboration on sexual content in my new evie rules. the third is what’s on my google doc, a condensed version of my rules. there is a major difference between smutting and posting a public dash event dedicated to sex versus being open to explore sexuality as a topic. they are not the same. also, me not choosing to smut does not dictate my opinion on smut, so do not make assumptions about that either. if you want to move on, why are you still talking about me on dash, especially when unprompted? if you just want to move on, why are you upset that i’m not “written off”?

this person has vagued me multiple times ( which they conveniently did not show in the call-out ), this person has been shown to talk badly of me in private ( and now, publicly as well )    ----    all of which i have not done. i have screenshots sent by others to show for it, but do not feel it’s relevant to share because this is not about her. this is just about defending myself. 

i have spent three months apologizing for feeling things, apologizing for reacting, apologizing for things i should not have been apologizing for. i have spent so long accepting blame because i felt it would help. i’m done doing that. i know what i did and what i didn’t do. people know what i did and didn’t do.

all in all, i am confused on why a call-out was made when the content provides nothing other than catty remarks meant to air out personal drama. the messages exchanged only show how i tried to remedy things. the screenshots of my “vagues” were just responses, and most of which had nothing to do with this person. my initial silly dash commentary and later discomfort over a sexual dash event posted by this person is not a vague. 

if you ( referring to maker of the call-out and others who partook ) are upset about people not talking about me in regards to the “rest of the call-out”, maybe consider the fact that there was nothing about me in it that warranted a call-out in the first place. people saw that i did nothing wrong. the only thing of substance in the call-out was something the maker themselves did : the public, sexual dash event. people are allowed to identify that as a more prominent issue as opposed to how my messages or public posts could be perceived through basic, biased narrative manipulation.

me deciding to unfollow / softblock blogs that interact with this person =/= involving the descendants rpc or making it public. i am allowed to softblock whoever i want to cultivate my dash experience. most people i know have it in their rules that they are okay with people softblocking for their comfort and that it won’t be taken personally. you know what IS making it public and involving the entire descendants rpc? this person messaging a descendants server and name dropping me in the server, reducing the situation to just being about a “url” and publicly announcing it in the server. here are the facts to consider: her message was sent jan. 21. my DNI went up feb 2. 

so, regarding the call-out: there was no bullying, no manipulation, no harassment, no gaslighting, nothing from my end, and the call-out shows precisely that the claims are just that: claims. whatever was felt is valid, but feelings =/= gravity of the actual action itself - the most common thing pointed out in therapy: feelings are valid, but are they justified? call-outs should be reserved for people who cause actual harm, not because someone wants an excuse to blacklist. if i am a “bully” for unfollowing blogs for my own comfort, then i think the rpc really needs to reevaluate what these terms mean because the misuse is harmful. 

here are the things i did do: treated everyone i talked to with respect. approached things civilly. communicated. tried to accommodate for others. attempted to make a safe space for myself. did not involve the entire rpc by announcing it in a server. did not make a call-out post nor pin it. did not continue to name drop afterwards despite claiming to want to move on.

this entire situation is absurd and should have never been public, much less made a call-out for !! while this was meant to defend myself and state facts, i understand it may not change minds. a friend has told me that people will hate me because they want to hate me, no matter what. and i can’t do anything about that !! all i have to say is that holding hate in your heart never ends well. i hope everyone can find peace at some point.

so please, let me move on. let me write with my friends. let me unfollow / softblock people to keep my dash comfortable. let me take a break from descendants while also having the choice to return at anytime. please stop talking about me when i’m not even giving this another thought and haven’t since i moved blogs. please stop name dropping. stop keeping tabs on me, stop stalking my new blog. please leave me alone. i hold absolutely nothing against anyone i may have softblocked / unfollowed or am not currently interacting with on my new blog. my IMS / discord is always available, you will not be violating my safety by messaging me, everyone is welcome, but i also understand if you feel the need to separate yourself !!! as for those of you who have interacted with the call-out post, i wish you the best but i hope you understand why i do not want to interact with you by any means in the future. 

i’m hoping this post lays everything to rest, seeing as my first one did not. honestly, what are you trying to prove if you still have to post about this? it helps nobody. this back-and-forth is exhausting and unneeded. no more. let’s be better people, yeah?

i hope everyone takes care of themselves, i hope you all have a great day / night !!! thank you for reading this long boi !!

[firewoodfigs]

for the only one bed prompts......... "and only one pillow so a used b's chest or stomach" 🥺

EMMA, MY LOVE. FOR YOU I WOULD GIVE THE WORLD AND MORE <3 I hope you enjoy, friend!!! <3

also on ao3 - i like it when you sleep (for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it)

                                      ++++++

She falls asleep on the car ride back.

It’s unusual, such behaviour. Ordinarily, she’d be keeping watch or the one driving, but throwing herself at wolves and flirting with married men (and tolerating her commanding officer’s unwarranted jealousy) is indescribably wearying. It’s even worse than military training, having to put up all these fake niceties and pretenses. She wonders how Roy does this every day. Maybe that’s why he’s so tired all the time, Riza thinks. Now she knows why.

She startles awake briefly when the car jerks. Riza mutters, unintelligibly, something about safety and watching the road. She dimly registers the sound of a murmured apology from the driver’s seat.

Riza nods, and drifts back uneasily to sleep.

(In her sleep, Riza dreams of a dimly-lit courtroom and of Lady Justice, so white and pure and glorious even in the shadows. It is a recurring dream of hers, but it still leaves her palms clammy and her heart racing, like she’s just pulled the trigger on someone for the very first time.)

—

“We’re here,” Roy announces.

Riza groans as she rouses from her nap. There’s an ache that’s starting to crawl into her head, and she wonders if she’s just had too much to drink earlier (she thinks she’s done a pretty good job of turning down the offers of free, expensive wine though). She rubs at her temples wearily, blinking hard in an attempt to dispel some of the lingering fatigue.

“Are you alright, Lieutenant?”

“Yes,” she answers, without hesitation. Riza straightens in her seat, smoothing out the creases in her outfit. It’s a fitting, champagne-coloured number that is as meddlesome as it is pretty. (Riza hasn’t worn something like this in a while, simply because there hadn’t been any occasion to. She thinks she’ll probably have a hard time getting out of it later.) She opens the door and stretches her legs out. “Let’s go, sir.”

“Alright.”

The motel is just like any other motel, Riza thinks. It’s old and musty and right in the middle of nowhere, managed by a receptionist who’s clearly half-asleep at their workstation. They check in under the guise of a civilian, childless couple, as usual. Elizabeth and Andrew Ditlev, yes, a room for two. We won’t be needing anything else, thank you. There’s the sound of keys jangling and paper notes rustling, and then she’s dragging her feet up the creaking stairs towards their room on the second floor, Roy’s hand hovering uncertainly over her back.

Riza nudges it away and reassures him that she’s just fine. (He continues fretting, anyway.)

—

It’s only after she’s taken a shower that Riza notes the irregularity in their room.

“Sorry,” Roy says. There’s a sheepish edge to his voice, but the way he’s grinning tells her that he’s not altogether unhappy about their current predicament. “I tried asking for another pillow, but reception said they’ve none left.”

Riza frowns. She moves to sit on the edge of the queen-sized bed, drying her hair with a thin towel. It’s not uncommon for them to share a bed; going on these undercover operations as a loving, married couple meant that it was only logical for them to do so. It’s not like she has anything against it, either, but she’s always maintained a distance from him, even while on the same bed. They usually sleep with their backs turned (although Roy has a peculiar habit of snaking his arm around her waist just before daybreak).

“Sorry,” Roy repeats, stifling a yawn. He’s already taken the liberty of going shirtless, while she was bathing. “You can take the pillow, if you’d like. I can go without.”

Riza shakes her head and gestures towards the shower.

“No, it’s fine. I’ll figure something out.”

He yawns again, dragging himself to the shower.

“Really, Lieutenant. It’s no hassle at all.”

Water starts running again, from the shower. Riza shifts towards the nightstand and picks up the phone. There’s a little note beside — press ‘0’ for reception and/or room service.

She does exactly that.

“What?”

“Hello,” Riza greets in response. “I’m calling from Room 204. We were wondering if you happened to have a spare pillow —”

“I already told you we have no more pillows,” the receptionist interrupts, groggily. Riza picks up on the poorly-concealed hint of annoyance and, somewhat annoyed herself, apologises insincerely for the apparent inconvenience caused. “Goodnight.”

The phone line goes dead.

Riza huffs. She puts the phone down and mutters something to herself about cheap motels and their stinginess. Resignedly, she fluffs the lone pillow and moves to lie down once her hair’s dry. (She thinks she’ll continue to keep her hair in a manageable bob like this, just for convenience’s sake — even if Roy prefers it otherwise.)

“Lieutenant,” he calls, sounding scandalised. Riza cracks an eyelid open and stares at him, as if to say, what? (She still has no idea how men do this so quickly, even after all these years in the military. It barely takes more than a minute for them to finish their ablutions, even though their bodies are nearly twice the size of hers. Thrice, if she’s including people like Major Armstrong in the count.) “What are you doing?”

“Sleeping. Or trying to.”

Roy makes a sound of disapproval as he dries himself (Riza turns away respectfully at this) and puts on his pajamas. She feels his weight on the mattress once he’s done, and when she refuses to budge from a spot he starts poking her from behind, like a needy child badgering their parents for an impossible gift (she doesn’t even remember behaving like this as a young girl).

Riza groans and rolls her shoulders. “What?”

“I told you to take the pillow, Lieutenant.”

“I told you it was fine.”

He clucks his tongue. Roy rolls her around to face him, and she bites her lips to stifle another groan.

“Stubborn as always, aren’t you?”

“Pot, kettle,” Riza murmurs wearily. She can barely keep her eyes open at this point, much less keep up with his nonsensical, baseless arguments. “Go to sleep, sir.”

Roy tries, vainly, to slip the pillow under her head a few minutes later, but Riza elbows him in the ribs and pulls the blanket over them, effectively ceasing the argument. He huffs petulantly and closes his eyes.

—

“Trouble sleeping?”

“No,” Riza mumbles, but it’s a lie. She knows that he knows it’s one. (It’s no secret that both of them have had trouble sleeping since the war.)

“You’re lying,” he says, though not accusingly.

Riza ignores him and clutches a handful of the motel’s standard-issue white blanket. She covers her eyes with them and tries to sleep, again, but she fails spectacularly at this otherwise simple task. There’s just something about motels and their pastel walls and background music that tends to set her on edge. Maybe it’s because it’s so unlike what she’s used to. (She’s fallen asleep to the sound of gunshots and explosions, more times than she has to Debussy.) Or maybe it’s the fact that she’s no longer sleeping on a single-sized bed, by herself.

“Are you sure you don’t want the pillow?”

“No.”

“Stubborn as ever,” he mutters. She thinks he’s given up on fighting a losing battle, when she feels his arms pulling her close.

“With all due respect —”

“Nothing inappropriate, Lieutenant. I promise you.” She struggles to free herself from his grip, but clearly, all the work he’s been putting at the gym lately has paid off. Riza glares at him, murderously. He simply grins. “Since they ran out of pillows, we’ll simply have to make one.”

“What, with alchemy?”

“Actually, that doesn’t sound entirely implausible.” Riza is about to push herself off his chest, when he tightens his grip around her. “But it’s late, and I’m tired, and besides, we’re supposed to be an ordinary couple, nothing else.”

The word rolls off his tongue infuriatingly. Riza gets the peculiar feeling that he’s enjoying this far more than he should be. She frowns, glancing at him from beneath her lashes.

“I do tend to move around a lot in my sleep, sir.”

“I know.” He shrugs against her, positioning her head so that it’s resting comfortably on his chest. Then Roy wraps his arms around her again, almost gleefully, uncaringly, as if there’s nothing inappropriate about their shared embrace. Riza huffs. “But it’s fine. Anything to help my favourite subordinate sleep.”

“How very kind of you, sir,” Riza mutters drily. She attempts, somewhat furtively, to tickle him - she knows all his weak spots by now - but Roy dodges it with surprising agility, like he would a bullet.

“Of course. Please make sure to give me a good performance review when the time comes,” he says, smirking in a way she can only describe as insufferable.

“Only if you stop drooling all over your desk.”

“For the record, I do not,” he says, with an injured sniff.

Riza rolls her eyes, but she doesn’t protest further. She won’t admit it aloud, but it’s nice, being held like this. Roy is unusually sweet in a way that he isn’t anywhere else. He hasn’t been this way since they were kids.

“Yes, you do,” Riza retorts softly, ignoring the lump in her throat.

(This scene is achingly familiar, like a vignetted memory, like an excerpt of a film she already knows the ending to. The ending is always the same in her dreams.)

Laughter rumbles from his chest. It is a lovely sound to hear, after a long day of work, but it rubs against her cheek ingratiatingly, and Riza makes a mental note to write a letter to the hotel when they’re back in the city — a not-too-gentle reminder to stock up on pillows and other necessities.

“We can save this argument for another time, Lieutenant. It’s two in the morning.”

Riza relents, because it is two in the morning. She thinks sleep should claim her now, rather than later; she’s been trying to cut down on her caffeine intake lately. But Roy starts stroking her hair, and then her back, like he’s trying to lull a child to sleep, and Riza has to swallow the satisfied hum lurking in her throat (she refuses to give him any satisfaction of knowing that she is, in fact, enjoying this, far more than she has any right to).

Riza clears her throat. She pushes his arm away.

“I’m not a cat, you know.”

Laughter, again. The caressing stops. She feels him pressing a kiss to the top of her head, and then he’s hugging her again, one arm resting languidly on her side like she’s some sort of a replacement bolster.

“I know. Goodnight, Riza,” he says, softly.

She doesn’t have the heart to remind him that they’re still on a mission.

“Goodnight,” Riza whispers. There’s a part of her that aches, yearns for this moment to be something more than a(nother) fleeting, stippled memory, but her bliss is abruptly broken by the commotion coming from upstairs — something about an adulterous affair and impecuniosity.

Riza shifts uneasily and tries to drown it all out by focusing on his heartbeat instead. It’s audible beneath her cheek — not quite like a lullaby, but close enough — just a gentle hum of life, enough to quell her frazzled nerves and lull her back into peace.

When she falls asleep at last, Riza dreams of something different, something that stems from her deepest desires.

(In her dreams, she’s in a white dress, and Roy is radiantly alive in a sunlit attic.)

[paper-n-ashes]

sparks and embers - chapter 13

Characters: Kylo Ren x Original Female Character, Poe Dameron x Original Female Character

Story Tags: Explicit (18+), Canon Compliant/Divergent (Set after TLJ), First Person POV, Love Triangle, Slow Burn, Enemies to Lovers, Porn with Plot, Hurt/Comfort, Kylo Ren hates Poe Dameron

Chapter 13 - Exposure

Words: 5.5k

Chapter Tags/Warnings: Descriptions medical procedures

Read on AO3 or Start from the beginning

~

“Alex! You’re okay!”

“So are you!” I burst, eyes already wet with tears of relief. My gaze darted over the holoprojection of Poe’s face, his brilliant smile beaming through from lightyears away.

“You have no idea how glad I am to see you,” he grinned, leaning closer into the holo. “We’ve been trying to make this contact for weeks.”

A dazzling joy surged in my chest, so happy that my assumptions of being forgotten were baseless. “Did you complete your mission?”

“You’re talking to the best pilot in the galaxy here.” He shot me a charming wink, maintaining his smile. “Actually made it back a few days ahead of schedule.”

Tears continued to dribble out, attempting to calm myself with a shaky exhale. “I’ve been so worried.”

Poe’s expression turned earnest. “I was going to say the same thing.” His expression fell, looking down. “I didn’t want to leave you there. I’m… I’m so sorry Alex. We’re all sorry.”

“It’s alright,” I soothed. “It was the right thing to do at the time. Did you all safely make it back to the base?”

“Left just in time to avoid their tracking systems. So your sacrifice wasn’t for nothing.”

“Indeed it wasn’t,” a woman’s voice agreed, her instantly recognisable image appearing in front of me moments later.

Leia Organa.

“I’m so glad to finally put a face to the person who saved my best fighters.”

I was awestruck at the sight of the entrancing older woman, with kind yet determined eyes looking right at me. “Well… uh… They were the ones who protected me against the Death troopers. I really didn’t do anything.”

She shook her head, smiling warmly. “We all know what you did, what you’ve endured because of your selflessness.”

“What I’ve endured?”

“We have recently gained a Resistance spy within the First Order, the one who directed you to this holoprojector,” Poe started explaining. “They’ve been keeping an eye on you. Sending us intel about your condition.”

I thought of the blonde, curled hair I glimpsed a few minutes ago, not recalling ever seeing it before. Whoever it was had obviously done his reconnaissance at a distance. “The cell stay wasn’t exactly easy,” I conceded, looking sincerely to Poe. “But I’m managing better now.”

A glaring lie.

“One thing they couldn’t tell us Alex,” Leia started, her expression now troubled. “Is why exactly they’re keeping you on the Finalizer. Our spy hasn’t been able to collect any information about the subject. To me, it seems a little... bizarre you’re being forced to work for them.”

I was stuck on how to begin to formulate an answer when a commotion from behind the two figures made them turn around.

“I heard you finally made contact!” Rey’s voice excitedly cheered from somewhere in the room, her image quickly arriving into view, displaying an enthusiastic grin as she huddled in next to Leia. “Alex! I’m so glad to see you!”

I returned a warming smile, her sunny disposition difficult not to mirror.

“Oh thank the maker,” Finn heaved, sliding alongside Rey, the four figures now pressed closely into the outline of the holo, Poe seeming faintly annoyed at the intrusion. “If I had to live through one more day of Poe ranting about this stealth signal not getting through, I was gonna go insane.”

Poe was already looking to me when I glanced at his face, an unspoken understanding exchanging between us. “Well now since apparently we’re all here,” he huffed, “Can we actually get back to the issue at hand? We’ve only got a limited amount of time before this signal becomes compromised, and the hard-lock on Alex’s comm-room door overrides.”

Leia nodded in agreement and looked at me again. “Do you know why they’re holding you there Alex?”

I was weighted with a heavy dose of terror in giving my answer, my stare shooting immediately to Rey. Her smile had faded, instead she wore an expression of reassurance.

She hadn’t told them.

“I… I… uh…” I stammered, a flurry of emotions spinning in my brain. I was so sure she would have exposed me.

“It’s okay Alex,” Rey insisted, her tone calming. “I know why you’re scared. I completely understand why you kept it a secret. But we won’t harm you because of it. I promise.”

All eyes darted to Rey, each face breaking into confusion.

Poe was the only one to say what they were all thinking. “What are you talking about?”

I felt my chest begin to tighten, oxygen becoming a little harder to grasp onto. “I’m not ready,” I whispered.

Rey’s appearance was comforting, yet serious. “It’s time. You may not be ready, but sometimes we don’t get the choice.”

I inhaled deeply, scrunching my lids closed, trying to build some sort of confidence to reject the instincts and rules I had been abiding by all these years. A lifetime of keeping my gift undisclosed, hiding it away, never getting too close to anyone, had left me more attached to my secret than anything else in the galaxy. Fear had always kept it’s hold, guiding my actions, and it was pulling at me again now, trying to warn me of the danger once more. But if I didn’t tell them, Rey would be forced to.

And above anything else, I wanted Poe to hear it from me.

“I can… use the Force,” I said slowly, most likely out loud for the first time in my life. “I taught myself… how to heal others with it, when they were close to death.” There was an excruciating silence as Poe, Leia and Finn comprehended my answer, each wearing a different expression of realisation. My stare was only focused on Poe, trying to properly gauge his reaction to my admittance of lying. “I didn’t want anyone to find out, so I’d also learnt how to hide it - to prevent other force-sensitive people from feeling my energy, from hearing my thoughts.”

“Why?” Leia asked gently. “Why were you so afraid?”

“My parents were distrustful of those who were attuned to the Force after living through a time where Darth Vader wreaked havoc on the galaxy. They told me old stories of little children being taken away from their families to be trained as Jedi, only to have all of them massacred, even the younglings. They made it seem like the most dangerous thing in the world was being someone with that gift. So even as a child, when I felt the power growing within, I pushed it down, hid it away. I didn’t want to fight in any wars, and I didn’t want to be killed. I just… wanted a normal life.”

Both Rey and Leia were nodding with me as I spoke, seeming to understand my decision.

“That’s why you were on Raxus. So isolated,” Poe murmured, not looking at me.

“Yes. I kept it a secret for as long as I could, all through my training, only using this power sporadically through the years. But I was too close to being caught whilst working in a medical camp on the Inner Rim, during a skirmish the First Order instigated on a planet because of their resources. A Stormtrooper noticed me healing one of the planet’s inhabitants, one whom he was sure he’d rendered on the brink of death. He wanted to take me to his leader, claiming he would have good use for someone with my abilities. I managed to escape him and ran, giving up my job, my home, all without telling anyone where I was going. I settled on Raxus, built my clinic, rarely having to use my power, never really worrying about being caught again. Until... Poe crashed on my doorstep.”

“And you had to use it then, didn’t you?” Rey assumed, obviously a question she had been waiting to ask. I nodded.

Finn’s eyes sparkled. “I knew it! I knew there was a reason he healed so quickly.”

The death stare Rey shot to him was severe in intensity, and under any other circumstance I would have thought it was funny. But my focus was centred completely on Poe’s expression as he remained engrossed in deliberation, his eyes still not reaching back to me.

“Is this why they’re keeping you held on the Finalizer? They wish to utilize your power to heal?” Leia guessed.

“They don’t know about it.”

Each of their expressions turned to disbelief.

“How? Surely Kylo Ren would have rummaged through your mind the minute you got on that ship,” Finn burst, turning to Rey. “That’s what he did to you right?” She nodded in agreement, still looking to me for my answer.

“I was able to keep him out, like I did to you Rey,” I replied.

Rey seemed impressed, and a realisation clicked behind her eyes. “That’s why he won’t let you leave. He hasn’t figured out why."

I became uneasy, suddenly worrying about the blame I’d been placing on her. “He thinks it’s because of you, that you’ve somehow placed a block around my mind. And I... didn’t exactly correct him.”

Rey let a sly smile form on her lips. “Well that would be a valuable thing to make use of, if only it were true.”

Finn appeared dubious. “I still don’t understand why you agreed to work for them.”

“I didn’t really have a choice,” I subtly scowled. “It was that or rot in a cell until Kylo Ren managed to infiltrate my thoughts, learning of my sensitivity to the Force, leaving me in a lot worse situation.”

Finn appeared understanding of that answer. It had been Rey’s own powers that made the man obsessed with capturing her. Leia, who had seemed more troubled while we conversed of the Supreme Leader, finally spoke up again. “How long do you think you can hold yourself against… him?”

“I don’t know.” My heart thumped with anxiety, reminded of his last attempt to penetrate my barrier. Thinking about it, with Poe’s image right in front of me, made a familiar sickness bubble in my stomach. He still refused to meet my gaze, his face pained, making an ache begin to surge in my chest.

“Well we have to make some kind of plan right? To rescue her before that happens? Poe?” Finn insisted, somehow rustling Poe out from his inner turmoil.

“Right. Sure. Of course,” he agreed, only the slightest glance in my direction. I had to clench my teeth to hold back the tears wanting to form in my eyes, his indifferent response causing a wave of guilt to wash through.

Leia could sense the tense energy exchanging between us, even through the holo. “Finn, Rey, let’s start discussing our next move. Away from the holoprojector.” She looked firmly at the two, an unspoken communication. Rey shot me a look of both support and sympathy, understanding exactly why Leia was leading them away.

“Hang in there,” Finn added before standing to leave. “We’ll get you out real soon.”

I tried my best to reply with a grateful smile, but it was hard to form through the nervousness I felt at being alone with Poe after my revelation.

One by one their figures receded from the flickering blue picture, leaving Poe alone once again. I couldn’t bring myself to speak first, unsure of what to say. He felt further away than ever, his touch a memory that continued to fade.

Time was running out, the seconds ticking away as we both waited in stillness for the other to break the strained silence. When his eyes finally drifted to me again, I was wounded by the hurt in them, still acutely obvious in the artificial image.

“Why couldn’t you tell me?” he whispered. “You had all that time.”

I dipped my head, conceding. “I was scared.”

“Scared of what?” he shot with unrestrained exasperation. “Scared that I would continue to be grateful for you saving my life?”

I looked back up, stunned by his angered tone. “I didn’t want anyone to find out, let alone someone who had ties with the Resistance.”

“What did you think I would do, what the Resistance would make you do?”

“Pull me into a war I didn’t want to fight! Lead me into a life I didn’t want to lead!”

I could see his jaw tighten, an attempt in calming himself. “The fact you assume I’m the type of person that would force you into anything, let alone war, even after everything I told you, is insulting.”

“That’s so unfair,” I retaliated, my bottom lip on the edge of trembling. “I didn’t even know who you were when I decided to heal you. I chose to risk everything to keep you alive. Doesn’t that mean anything?”

Poe exhaled hard, the sound crackling in the holo. “I will always be in your debt for what you did. But you still lied to me Alex. To my face. You assumed the worst of me, of all of us. You hid the truth because you thought we would take advantage of your power, not caring about what you wanted, what you could choose.”

“You haven’t lived my life Poe,” I argued, a ferocity beginning to rise. “You haven’t lived with the same fear I have all your life.”

He stared at me through the staticky blue light, silence once again taking over. We were locked in each other’s eyes, even through all the distance separating us.

“You pushed me away because of it, didn’t you?” he asked, the sting of his tone now gone.

I didn’t have to respond for him to know my answer. Suddenly there was a loud click of the door behind me, the hard-lock releasing.

Our time was up.

“I’m sorry,” I implored, only a moment before Poe’s face was snatched from my view, the holoprojector powering down into darkness.

My throat felt tight, a new kind of shame gripping tightly. I’d always been so afraid of sharing my secret, but not for this reason. Not because it would make me a liar in the eyes of the one I longed to be reunited with so badly.

*

I stayed in the darkened comm-room long after the hard-lock was disengaged. No one came to open it. Even if they had, they would have only found my figure sitting against one of the large data configurators, stuck in a motionless trance.

I wasn’t entirely sure what kept me from crying, because there was certainly a hollow sadness sitting on my chest, yet the emotion never seemed to manifest into anything. It was possibly due to the stark realisation that my power, my use of the Force, wasn’t a secret anymore.

And nothing bad happened.

They hadn’t been afraid, judgemental, desperate to use it for their own benefit. They had wanted nothing. Rey even kept it to herself, waiting for me to expose the circumstance in my own time, supporting the decision I’d made long ago to hold the power deep within.

Alongside the sadness, there was an intense shame thumping with my heartbeat. Poe had been right, once again highlighting my selfish and distrustful nature, even to those who didn’t deserve it. He’d always been unconditionally honest, and I had given him lies in return. He was right to be offended, to feel slighted by my deceit, our whole encounter now coloured with my dishonesty.

The only comforting part of the holoprojector discussion, apart from knowing for sure Poe with how we parted, was there was a plan being formed for my rescue. There was still a chance I might make it off this ship, escaping before Kylo Ren saw through my weakening façade. He had gotten closer than ever before in the preceding morning, and it couldn’t be long until he figured out another way to tug at my emotions hard enough to unravel me completely.

My only hope was that it wasn’t my attraction to him, the way he undeniably ignited the fire inside that he continued to toy with in his endeavour to push past the veil over my mind.

*

When I slipped back through the doors of the Prestige ward I was bombarded with questions from Risha and the other staff concerning the incidents of the night, most of them somewhat impressed with my boldness. While the others thought nothing of my return, assuming that for once justice had prevailed and I’d been seen to act in self-defence, Risha was obviously astonished I wasn’t still sitting in my cell. She followed me to the isolation room, where my intubated patient still lay in critical condition, but fortunately alive.

“How did you manage to convince them to let you out?” she questioned. “I thought I’d be visiting you in that cell.”

I read over the observations, the patient’s vitals seemingly stable during my absence.

I would need to thank Irwin later.

“I didn’t have to convince them of anything. My retaliation was considered appropriate by the Supreme Leader, so he allowed my release.”

Risha physically recoiled in disbelief. “There are like, 20 things wrong with what you just said.”

“It was a surprise to me too,” I agreed, continuing to perform my own assessment of the ill man in front of me.

“Alex, I don’t think you comprehend how unusual it is for the Supreme Leader to involve himself with matters like this.”

“I think we can both agree nothing about my situation is usual.”

“I mean, that’s true.” She folded her arms, still doubtful. “But for him to punish the Colonel instead of you. That’s just…bizarre. Snoke would never have been called to make a decision like that, let alone given any care for your wellbeing.”

I stopped, giving Risha’s answer more than a few seconds of thought. “Maybe he wants to be a different type of leader.”

She snorted. “We all know Snoke was the one who seduced him to the dark side, who turned him into what he is today. You think he would cast away his teachings, suddenly show compassion?”

“You’ve obviously given this a lot of thought,” I murmured.

“Well there’s not a lot else to talk about working on this ship. All we debated in the days after Snoke’s death, and Kylo Ren’s appointment as Supreme Leader, was whether his rule would be the same or significantly worse. No one even had the slightest notion he would be… like this.”

I shrugged, walking back to the progress notes and typing my assessment out. “Maybe he thinks if I owe him one I’ll be less likely to cause anymore issues. Maybe he hopes for me to like it here so I won’t attempt an escape.”

Risha tugged at my arm, making me look to her. “Is that something you were considering?” she whispered.

I didn’t want to give any kind of verbal confirmation to that intention, knowing now the ears always listening into our conversations. I also refused to implicate this sweet person in any of my future plans, knowing it was safer to give an overly dismissive answer. “Of course not. I wouldn’t even know how if I wanted to. I’ll just keep waiting it out. I’m sure they’ll grow bored with me eventually.”

Risha certainly wasn’t convinced, but she didn’t dictate that stance. “So how are you feeling? After… you know.”

“I’m alright,” I reassured, which was a blazing lie. “Better now knowing the Colonel won’t be back on this ward again.”

“Me too,” Risha breathed, showing me a small smile. Mild irritation sizzled knowing what it took to finally have someone to act on a predator like Colonel Wynver, still wishing his punishment would have been more severe. But I had to be appreciative that Risha, and the other women who worked here, could have some comfort due to his hopefully permanent absence from their life.

*

I farewelled Risha after making sure Irwin had given her an adequate handover of the nights new admits, noticing that more beds were now filled with those who had contracted the heavily contagious illness. There was a part of me that worried about the situation I would return to at the start of my shift this evening, but I was too exhausted to fret for too long.

I made sure to pick up a meal from the mess hall before returning to my quarters, horrendously starving from a whole shift without a chance to eat. The shower I had after ravenously devouring my food was just soothing enough to put me in a better state of mind before settling under the bed sheets to sleep, even with the ache beating slowly in the background of my mind at how Poe and I had parted from our transmission.

My only hope was Rey could make him see sense in the way I had kept my power hidden, maybe make him understand how harsh the fear was that drove me to lie.

Sleep arrived effortlessly this time, only minutes passing with my eyes closed before I was pulled into slumber.

*

When I felt my eyes open again, it was obvious I was dreaming, standing on a deserted beach, the horizon a flat line against the evening sky, a lone sun close to sinking past the ocean. It felt peaceful, a melting glow spreading through my body, relishing the sunset scene. But soon I realised I’d never been to a place like this before. I’d never even stepped close to a beach in my short life.

It was then I sensed the presence with me, the strange energy hovering far behind my figure. I went to turn, to face the mystery aura, but I was chained to where I stood, my eyes still viewing the yellowed skyline, the faint sound of small waves lapping against the shore. The energy shifted, my focus trained on its movement as it edged closer, finally taking a position just beyond my right shoulder.

“You’ve been doing spectacularly well,” a familiar voice mused.

I sighed. “I wondered when you were finally going to disturb me again. You’ve been unusually quiet.”

I felt a smile cross the figures lips, although I was unsure exactly what its face would appear as.

“You seem to be managing perfectly fine without my assistance. I didn’t feel the need to intrude.”

“As opposed to back on Raxus, when I couldn’t avoid your constant warnings?” I grumbled, recalling the many interruptions the voice had made concerning my growing attachment to Poe.

The energy moved again, my eyes darting to the space beside me, still unable to turn my head to that direction. I was only able to capture the image of a hooded figure stepping into my periphery, its face almost completely hidden by darkened brown fabric. I could just make out the shape of their lips. Human. And feminine, matching the tone I had heard in my mind for almost my whole life.

“You were making poor decisions,” the hooded woman stated. “Decisions that would bring about damaging consequences.”

“Maybe if I knew the consequences you seem to be so concerned with, I would make the right choices.”

She laughed, a low breathy chuckle that was oddly musical. “That’s not how this works. I can’t interfere with your free will.”

“Can you at least tell me what ‘this’ is? Why you’re inside my head?”

I could see her lips purse, a deliberate silence between us. “It’s not time yet. You’re not ready.”

An unwelcome shiver pulsed, irritation swelling once again. “I would ask what exactly I need to be ready for, but I can assume you won’t tell me that either.”

The woman smiled again, white teeth peeking through her lips on the edge of my vision. “I’m glad you’ve come to that understanding quickly.”

I exhaled hard, growing impatient with the interference of my much-needed sleep. “Is there a reason why you’re here now, deciding to show yourself for the first time?”

“I wanted to ensure you knew you were playing your part well, in the hopes it would encourage you to stay on this path.”

I creased my eyebrows, contemplating how any of my actions in the last few weeks would have been appropriate on this journey I was apparently walking. “And I’m assuming you’ll let me know when I might divert from this destination you’ve got in mind?”

“Indeed,” she nodded, her head lifting in time to watch the sun finally fade completely past the horizon, plunging both of us into darkness. “But I have faith you won’t require my help for the foreseeable future.”

I could only hope such a notion was true, this woman’s voice always having been a horrible strain on my thoughts. But without knowing exactly what I was doing so well, I was unsure if I could keep her intrusions from appearing again. I watched with the woman as stars began to glitter through the sky, reflecting on the stilled ocean, making an even bigger vision of night envelop the landscape. A delicate breeze of wind then brushed against my skin, and she was gone, her energy fading instantly, leaving me alone on the beach once again.

The soothing power of the twinkling scene soon made an overwhelming fatigue encircle my brain, and I was unable to prevent my eyelids from drooping closed.

*

It was obvious I’d been rustling in my sleep when I awoke again hours later, sheets twisted haphazardly over my limbs. I’d finally managed a full 8 hours, feeling the most rested I’d been in days. Although waking to an impossibly long list of questions I couldn’t get answers to didn’t exactly make me feel relaxed.

I laid on my back, wishing I could will the woman’s voice back into existence, only wanting to know why and how she housed her spirit inside my mind. The spoken warnings and guidance had always been there, pestering me with advice, sometimes threatening. But I always assumed it was a form of my own conscience, born from an unknown area of my brain that battled its morals against my decision making. Knowing now it was something more than that, that it was something or someone keeping a close watch over my actions, was oddly comforting.

Maybe I hadn’t been alone all of these years.

*

My last overnight duty before returning to the day shift was chaotic to say the least. Almost all beds of the Prestige ward became filled with viral patients, a large portion of the Finalizer Command leaders now in my company. A dark humour would have mentioned to the Resistance yesterday that this sickness was probably more incapacitating than their assaults had ever been, but I honestly didn’t want to place the idea of biological warfare inside their heads.

While my intubated patient had already improved from my last visit, I was now dealing with three more who’s health was extremely critical. I had never been so appreciative for the medical droids who worked here, their ability to recognise deteriorations in vitals being much quicker than my own.

I’d been given a status report from the rest of the ship earlier in the night, which implied the other wards were in much the same position. Although, it was interesting to note the slowing occurrence between Stormtrooper personnel, their armour and helmets seeming to provide an amount of protection that the Command leaders didn’t utilise.

The Bio-med lab had assured they would have a cure and subsequent vaccine within the next couple of days, pressing us to keep as many patients alive in the meantime. Which was easier said than done. Bacta didn’t help in eradicating the virus or it’s symptoms.

Fortunately for my own health I had already been afflicted with a strain similar during an assignment to Lothal in my training days, the illness sweeping through most of our workers, spread by one of the wounded soldiers. Luckily, none of us had been struck down too harshly, and it had left most of us somewhat immune. In knowing this however, I began to feel a looming dread for the medical staff of this ship who most likely had never been exposed before. It couldn’t be long before they themselves would need to be treated, and I prayed it wouldn’t leave me as the sole doctor still well enough to keep working in the time before a cure was found.

In the morning I handed over the night’s events to the day shift, giving strict instructions for the care of the four intubated patients, offering to return if I was required to at any time. I’d been afforded a full day cycle before returning to normal working hours, a day off of sorts, but with little freedoms being afforded to me on this ship to utilise my free time, I was quite comfortable in being called back to ease the load on the Prestige staff.

No such request had been made by the time I’d taken care of my daily routine, sleeping soundly through another 8 hours, this time without the interruption of vivid dreaming. It was early evening, which was only ever evident by the chronometer in my quarters, and I’d found myself too anxious about how the ward was coping to focus on the literature I was attempting to read.

The unease eventually caused me to change into the mundane set of informal clothes the First Order had allowed, wanting to pay a visit to the ward to ease my worry. A pair of black pants hemmed tight against the outline of my legs and a grey sweater which wrapped around my torso, leaving a bow at the back. I hadn’t pulled my hair up, assuming my visit wouldn’t actually require me to do any work. I wanted to appear as casual as possible, hopefully not implying they would be desperate for my assistance.

I was about to slip around the corner of the small lobby outside my quarters, pondering over the fact I’d never seen anyone enter or exit the two other doors, when I was disrupted by the sight of General Hux making his way down the corridor. He was alone, without his usual entourage of Stormtroopers My eyes narrowed, watching him suspiciously as he closed the space between us, noting the stressed expression he wore, his porcelain cheeks slightly red.

“What have I done this time?” I prodded as he stopped in front of me.

“I’m afraid I’m not in the mood for your juvenile mockery Miss Jago,” he snapped. “Come with me, I have a task you are required for.”

I folded my arms. “This is meant to be my day off.”

“You’ll find that I don’t particularly care,” Hux grumbled. It occurred to me how unwilling he seemed to be here, most likely a stern order behind his reason for being in my presence. “You don’t have a choice in this matter. Now follow me.”

“Could you at least tell me what you’re hauling me away to do?”

He didn’t stop his exit. “You’ll find out soon enough. I’m not going to ask you again. Follow me.”

It was curiosity that made me obey his demand, beginning to step behind the irritating man as he led me to an unspecified objective. When we started veering towards a familiar turbo-lift, noting him pressing the floor I’d memorised from the previous day, my whole body pulsed with anger.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I seethed, looking to Hux with a burning contempt.

“It was an order,” he replied sharply.

“It always is,” I fumed, leaning into the durasteel wall of the turbo-lift.

What did he want with me now?

Hux stormed ahead when the doors opened, my shorter strides barely able to keep up as we walked through the darkened hallway. With a simple wave of his hand on the security panel the blast doors opened to the room I had previously been forced into, the huge open view of endless space still taking my breath away.

Hux didn’t stop in the lounge area, instead swerving to the door at the far left, pressing a code quickly into the lock, waiting for me to enter first once it opened. I looked at Hux quizzically before moving past, taking a moment to register the scene I’d been made privy to.

My eyes scanned over Kylo Ren’s figure, now hunched into a ball underneath the sheets of his bed, a sheen of sweat noticeable on his forehead even from the doorway. He was asleep, however it didn’t appear even close to restful, his breaths loud and heaving.

“The Supreme Leader appears to be afflicted with the virus,” Hux stated in a hushed tone, still emotionless as ever. “He requires the care of a medical professional until his health returns to normal. I think you can understand the confidential nature of the task I’m giving to you.”

I nodded slowly, still stunned at what I’d walked into. “But why me? Surely there are other doctors who could do this. Ones who aren’t his hostage.”

“That is most definitely true,” Hux agreed. “But he asked for you.”

~

Next Chapter

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[a-student-out-of-time]

((Mod, since you value respecting different opinions and everything, something's recently happened: the Youtuber Kubz Scouts said he didn't like a character and was happy they died, so fans of that character are now screaming insults at him and demanding that he be "canceled". Because if there's one thing that drives Danganronpa fans into a screaming at the top of their lungs frenzy, it's other people daring to have a different, and perhaps unpopular, opinion about fictional characters.))

//Did you want my opinion on this? Because I can’t really give you one, since I haven’t watched his DR playthroughs and I’m not at all interested in internet drama.

//As for that kind behavior, if you do want my opinion on that, I’ll do my best to provide. I’ll put it under here for anyone who’s not interested.

Let’s not pretend this is exclusive to Danganronpa fans or that this is a new development. I remember the days when��everyone was playing Undertale and anyone who didn’t go for the Pacifist Run and didn’t do everything perfectly was subject to a lot of discontent. Hell, I remember when Superwholock was a thing and people genuinely and unironically used threats like “You messed with the wrong fandom.”

Someone disliking a game or a character in a game is not a personal attack on you because you like them. We cannot assume that just because someone likes or dislikes something, they are by extension directing their feelings toward people who do not share their feelings on the matter. I examine media on its own merits and never try to list the fandom as a reason why I dislike something. Media and fandom are exclusive things and we can talk about the problems and merits of one, the other, or both.

This is the biggest one: Cancelling is not a real thing, at least not the way many of us think it is. There are people who’ve been “cancelled” and yet still have fans, still talk about things the same way, and still have a voice in public despite doing shitty things or just things deemed “unacceptable” by some group of people. Cancelling is more often than not just momentary outrage followed by mass attempts at character assassination, and it’s often filled with baseless accusations and quotes pulled out of context rather than real evidence for bad behavior. And in most cases, it will fade away. While I absolutely do think that people should be held accountable after saying and doing horrible things, there are people who’ve been “cancelled” for honest mistakes or behaviors they themselves did not realize were bad, or even for very minor things like people not liking the way they draw or for not liking a popular character. And this kind of thing really just takes the form of sending hate mail and demanding that they disappear or die. The kind of behavior people are supposed to discourage in any circumstance. The thing I dislike the most about this behavior is not just that it’s just reskinned cyberbullying, but that it actually makes the problems worse. When you harass and insult people for not holding your opinion, that is not going to endear them or anyone to your side. In fact, it’s probably going to make them stick to their opinions even harder. And when that happens, it makes it so easy for shitty people to co-opt that as a sign of how irrational and cruel your side is. It also hurts that it feels like most people who engage in this stuff think they’re doing the world a favor, when all they’re doing is harassing someone whose reputation they don’t have the power to destroy. I think most people do this either because they’re genuinely ignorant of their inability to really damage someone’s credibility, that they think it makes them a good person for stopping “unacceptable” behavior, or maybe they’re just in it for the drama, because it’s “fun”. But what really hurts the most is this expectation many of us now have, that we’re one opinion or one stupid post away from getting showered with hate mail, doxxed and maybe even pushed to the brink of suicide, and for things that we may not have even meant. To be crystal clear, I will not excuse genuinely repulsive behavior and you shouldn’t either, but this is not the way to handle it. If you want people to change their opinions or understand where they went wrong, communicate with them and help them understand. You need to engage with them openly and kindly. Compassion is the key. I say this not for the people who’ve been “cancelled”, but for the people who think it’s a good idea: it can be so easy, but you will not get anyone to agree with you just by answering hate with hate, and you will never be able to completely silence anyone in today’s world. You simply won’t. Most importantly, this kind of behavior does not put you on a moral high ground, it makes you no better than the people you claim to be standing against. Sending death threats and hate mail to people is wrong regardless of who’s doing it, and if one person does it, you’d be the bigger person by not responding to them. Most of all though, remember Hanlon’s Razor: never attribute to malice what can equally be attributed to ignorance. Some people make mistakes and post things without realizing what exactly they mean- I’ve done this myself and I had people point out how bad they were, so I simply deleted the posts. People are often much better and more understanding than they’re given credit for and I want people to understand that. And if you try and get them to listen, but they still refuse to see things your way, ignore them. Move on from them and try to find people who will. You can’t simply force opposition out of existence, but you can try to at least get more people to see things your way through kind words, sharing of thoughts and understanding alternative viewpoints. I would never ask anyone following me to try and “cancel” people who don’t like my writing. I want to encourage kind communication and open discussion, because that’s how we learn and how we improve. What I do ask is that you be good to others and to yourselves, ignore the drama, and talk openly and kindly with other people. Compassion and understanding is how things truly improve.

[tsukikoayanosuke]

The Hero’s Journey of Vil Schoenheit (Part 1)

You've heard about the hero's journey.

In this post, I'll be trying to discuss the journey of Vil Schoenheit throughout Pomefiore Arc. Now, I might get it wrong, please be free to say it.

First of all, we need to know what is exactly the hero's journey. The Hero’s Journey, or the monomyth, is a common story structure shared by cultures worldwide, in which a character ventures into unknown territory to retrieve something they need. Facing conflict and adversity, the hero ultimately triumphs before returning home, transformed.

According to Joseph Campbell, there are three stages of a hero's journey

The Departure Act: the Hero leaves the Ordinary World.

The Initiation Act: the Hero ventures into unknown territory (the " Special World ") and is birthed into a true champion through various trials and challenges.

The Return Act: the Hero returns in triumph.

In each stage, there are some steps a hero must push through. According to Christopher Voglet, there are 12 steps. 

But, in this post, we'll be talking about the Departure Act and it's five steps, which consists of:

Ordinary world

Call to adventure

Refusal of the call

Meeting with the mentor

Crossing the first threshold

Interestingly enough, at first glance, Vil doesn't actually go through this. It didn't seem he refuse his call or meet a mentor. But we can make some adjustments. So, let's start as I read the translation just for this analysis.

 1. The Departure Act: Ordinary world

"In which we meet our Hero."

Starting in the journey in the simple beginning, establishing the mundane world and the hero we'll be following around.

Well, it should be 5-1 since it's the first chapter, right? But Vil doesn't appear here. It does establish that the second semester is starting, but we've established it before this, right? Thus, Vil's journey actually starts in 4-41.

The second semester is just starting and our first introduction to Vil is him ordering Rook to catch the runaway Epel, claiming he will do anything to attain the utmost beauty. We establish the character Vil, at first glance, he's a strict dorm leader of Pomefiore with a thing with beauty.

This continues in 5-2 where Vil seems to be the only one to noticed Malleus, meaning that he's observant.

Azul then spends a paragraph detailing Vil being an influencer to Riddle, and to an extend, us the players.

So, we now know the basic introduction of our hero. Vil Schoenheit is the Pomefiore's dorm leader who is also a young influencer with many followers. An observant young man, but rather strict, and has a thing with being the most beautiful person in the world.

 2. The Departure Act: Call to adventure

"In which an adventure starts."

It's time to kick the hero out of their comfort zone.

The answer seems to be pretty obvious, isn't it? 

It has to be the Vocal & Dance Competition, mentions first in 5-2 and continues until 5-3.

But, in 5-3, we have the first mention of the character Neige LeBlanche and as we all know, he's kinda important to Vil. 

Because Neige is Vil's 'call to adventure' and throughout the story, Vil's end goal is to be the most beautiful person in the world, finally dethroning Neige.

 3. The Departure Act: Refusal of the call

"In which the Hero digs in their feet."

This is kinda tricky to see. For one thing, Vil doesn't actually refuse the VDC idea, in fact, he's onboard especially with Neige also participating. So, Vil must've skipped this part, right? Well... How about we see it from a different angle? Let's try to see this from someone who had played or read the translations of Pomefiore Arc.

During these two dorm leader meeting, there are some instances where Vil frown and actually pissed off.

But 'the refusal of the call' actually occurs when Azul is promoting Vil where Vil calls it a 'baseless advertisement'. Especially since we know how Vil's back story went down. So, Vil sort-of refuses all of Azul's empty boasting. He refuses to be acknowledged just from his front and followers. Azul didn't mention anything about his talent, his acting career, his hardship from not getting the role he deserve, his goal to be the most beautiful person in the world.

 4. The Departure Act: Meeting with the mentor

"In which the Hero acquires a personal trainer."

However, Vil's case is kinda special, because technically he doesn't have a mentor. In fact, he's actually a mentor to Epel in his appearance in 5-7.

But... This might sound a bit silly, but hear me for a second, okay?

Remember when I say there are instances where Vil looks pissed off. That instance is when Neige LeBlanche is mentioned. You guys know what happens after that, right?

He consults to Mira, twisted from Siri. From this point on, Vil always asks the same question: who is the most beautiful in the world? In this scenario, Mira is placed as Vil's mentor, the person who is supposed to aid the hero in their journey. But, as we all know, Mira is not that helpful, unfortunately.

 5. The Departure Act: Crossing the first threshold

"In which the Hero enters the other world in earnest."

The Departure Act ends and the journey has officially started. This is the point of no return. And where is this point for Vil?

The VDC audition in 5-16.

Now, as much as we can squeal as our favorite characters sing the theme song, we answer these few questions. Does the VDC audition:

Launched the central conflict?

The basic formula of a conflict is [CHARACTER + WANT + OBSTACLE = CONFLICT], which we had established. CHARACTER is "Vil", WANT is "to be the most beautiful thing in the world", OBSTACLE is "Neige LeBlanche". We can also say that the VDC is the platform to this conflict and the VDC audition is the front gate to this.

Established the theme of your book? 

Now, this is rather hard to see if you don't know the full story, but once again we'll see it like a veteran. The whole theme of Pomefiore Arc is as Rook mentioned in the last update is "believing in yourself". You know, the classic Disney thing? This eventually is Vil's downfall. Vil is looking for acknowledgment from everywhere, he wants to show the world that he's more than just a villain actor, he can do so much more if he's given the chance. But please pay attention to acknowledgment. Vil wants people to love him. But how is he going to that if he doesn't love himself? Doesn't believe in himself? We've been this time in our life when we feel that we're useless so we need other people to tell us that we're not useless for affirmation. Vil is basically living in that period. He needs someone to say that to him. But he doesn't want to say it to himself. That's basically, at least in my opinion, the main theme of Pomefiore Arc: learning to love yourself first before anything else. What's the point of all that hard work if you don't enjoy it at all?

Made headway into your character development? 

In the long run, yes. Vil's character development seems to go up and down, but we're still early in the story.

Once we passed the VDC audition, there's no turning back to change the squad. We already know from the previous arc that Scarabia Duo will pass the audition, along with Ace and Deuce. But more importantly, we're entering Vil's Initiation Act. His Hero's Journey is entering the unknown-territory.

Continues in Part 2...

[phroyd]

Joe Biden is going to be the next president of the United States. He will be inaugurated on January 20 and take power at noon that day. There is nothing, legally, that Trump can do to stop that.

What Trump and his feckless Republican Party might do illegally to try to overturn the results of the election and prevent Biden from taking power is a different matter. Trump has evidently intimidated the administrator of the General Services Administration into refusing to acknowledge Biden’s victory and thus prevent his team from starting the transition process. Only a smattering of Republicans have acknowledged that Biden won, and most of those who have, like George W. Bush, no longer hold any political power. Trump has already filed a raft of baseless lawsuits. His people are drumming up talk of some kind of Electoral College devilry to overthrow the popular will. And Trump fired the secretary of defense, Mike Esper, yesterday, which seems like the kind of thing one does before launching a coup d’état.

Years of watching Democrats snatch defeat from the jaws of victory gives many the sinking feeling that “it’s happening, again.” But rational thought tells us that these Trump gambits, all of them, are pointless. Biden won and his ascension to power is now inevitable, whether Trump accedes to that reality or not. As a wise man once sang: Gravity always wins.

Still, we’ve all seen Trump wriggle out of approximately a billion other defeats and scandals. He’s exposed the weakness of our democratic institutions, revealing just how useless they are in the face of his norm-breaking assaults. So it feels somehow naive to believe that his loss at the ballot box will translate into his loss of an actual job. It feels smart to consider that he might have a secret plan to retain that job, despite being voted out of it. Trump is the Michael Myers of our politics: He can’t be defeated, because the horror movie franchise makes too much money to ever end.

And yet, despite all this, I have gone to bed every night since Friday confident that President-elect Biden will become President Biden. I’ve come to this peace over the objection of my amygdala, which is the part of the brain that screams in fear and anxiety and tries to overpower rational thought. Here’s what I tell myself in order to help me sleep at night. Perhaps these are conversations others can have to achieve my level of forced serenity. (Amygdala in bold italics.)

Who won the election?

Joe Biden.

Who won the election if we only count legal votes?

Only legal votes are being counted. Joe Biden won those.

What about the possibility of a recount in swing states like Michigan or Pennsylvania?

Recounts traditionally do not change more than a thousand votes. Even if we’ve gone completely through the looking glass and this recount changes an unprecedented number of votes, like 5,000, which is completely unheard of, Biden’s margin of victory is too great to overcome. A recount would not change the result in states like Arizona, Georgia, Michigan, Nevada, Pennsylvania, or Wisconsin. If Trump wants to lose twice, that’s up to him.

What about all the lawsuits, especially the ones they keep filing in Arizona and Pennsylvania?

Trump’s election lawsuits fall, broadly, into three categories: lawsuits alleging poll watchers were too far away, lawsuits complaining about the established rules for submitting mail-in ballots, and lawsuits alleging Trump voters were denied their vote because of some kind of ballot machine malfunction.

None of these lawsuits provide evidence of massive voter fraud. None of the lawsuits provide evidence of voter fraud at all. Some of the lawsuits allege some accidents, but the remedy for those accidents is counting more votes, not fewer. Trump’s claims that his poll watchers were not allowed to watch the counting of mail-in ballots in Pennsylvania is flatly untrue, and his lawyers have had to admit in court that they were allowed in the room. They’ve been reduced to arguing that their poll watchers were not close enough, which, whatever. The remedy for that is to move them closer, not throw out tens of thousands of votes.

In fact, none of the Trump lawsuits allege anything that can be used to throw out tens of thousands of votes. Throwing out votes that have already been counted is not something that courts do. We can recount votes, this time with Trump watchers breathing down the necks of ballot counters and giving them Covid-19, but again, recounts don’t usually change the balance of votes by all that much.

The important thing to ask with each new Trump lawsuit is this: What is the remedy? If the remedy is “throw away tens of thousands of votes from people whose votes were clear in their choice and timely in their submission,” then that lawsuit is going nowhere. And if the remedy is not throwing out those entirely timely and legal votes, then the lawsuit will not change the results of the election.

Why would the Trump people be pushing these lawsuits if there was no chance for them to change the outcome?

Because Trump people are dumb? Hanlon’s Razor tells us: “Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.”

Joking aside, there might be many malicious reasons for the Trump campaign to be pushing lawsuits they know are destined to fail. Stirring up doubt in Biden’s victory is a prelude to refusing to acknowledge his authority as president. Trump, or one of his kids, or somebody “Trump-approved” is surely going to run for president in 2024, and making Trump’s rabid, white-supremacist base feel like the election was “stolen” from them has a political upside as they fight for their new “Lost Cause.”

And, there’s also the grift. Trump’s campaign is broke. They’ve literally written checks they can’t cash. Trump doesn’t like spending his own money on these things (to the extent he actually has any). These lawsuits purportedly challenging the election are a huge money-making opportunity for the Trump campaign. If you read the fine print on the new fundraising e-mails Trump’s campaign is sending out to supporters, they say that “60 percent of contributions” will go toward retiring campaign debt.

Would the Trump campaign put America through 70 days of trauma to make a buck? You better believe it. The whole Trump presidency is a guerrilla marketing campaign for the Trump brand that went too far.

But the Republican Senate is going along. This is just like impeachment. Republicans wouldn’t remove Trump then and they won’t now.

Well, it’s not up to Republicans to remove Trump from office. The Constitution does all that work on January 20. Joe Biden is the president on that day whether Republicans acknowledge it or not.

But now Bill Barr has gotten in on the game, and he is the worst of Trump’s henchman.

Yes.

He’s given federal prosecutors the green light to open up investigations into possible voter fraud.

So?

SO?

There wasn’t election fraud. Trump’s legal team has no evidence of election fraud and has no money to investigate to find such evidence, so they’re using the taxpayers’ money to look for it. But Barr’s prosecutors won’t find anything because there’s nothing there. This is going to turn out the same way it did when Barr investigated but didn’t arrest Hunter or Joe Biden.

The head of the Election Crimes Branch, Richard Pilger, resigned. That should tell us how wrong this is. But Barr is not going to succeeded. It’s just another thing to remember in 70 days when Barr is out of a job. We should arrest him and charge him with abuse of power.

What if Trump refuses to leave the White House?

Biden can be president from Delaware until the White House runs out of cheeseburgers. He’ll come out of hiding eventually.

But what if Republicans never acknowledged that Biden is the president?

How’s that different from the way they treated Barack Obama?

Good point, but what about a re-vote? I’ve seen MAGA people online calling for a re-vote.

Re-voting is not a thing. There is no statutory or constitutional language that can compel a nationwide re-vote. States will certify the results of their elections in the coming weeks. And then the Electoral College will meet on December 14 in a pro-forma session to…

WHAT ABOUT THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE?

Damn it.

Can Republican state legislatures put forward a slate of electors who will vote for Trump even though Biden won those states?

Let’s be very clear: The states get to choose how they will determine their own electors, but that determination has to be made before the election. A state with a Republican legislature—let’s say, Pennsylvania—could have decided to choose electors based on a simple vote of the legislature. In fact, Republican legislators contemplated doing such a thing. But they didn’t. Instead they decided, like every other state, to let the popular will in their state determine the slate of electors.

They can’t change the method of picking electors after the election has taken place. Remember, when voters showed up to vote, they technically weren’t voting for “Joe Biden” or “Donald Trump” but for a slate of electors who would vote for Biden or Trump. If Pennsylvania wanted to change those rules, it would have had to tell its voters before they voted. It can’t run a bait-and-switch on an election. It can’t say that a vote for Biden’s electors was actually a vote for the Pennsylvania legislature to choose the electors. This is an election, not a Groupon.

The only legal recourse, which some Republicans are arguing for, is to determine that the voters “failed to make a choice” on which slate of electors to nominate, or that the results of that choice are somehow unclear. But the results will be clear once Pennsylvania certifies its election results (and, in this case, the governor and secretary of state, who certifies the results, are Democrats). It will be a close election, but voters made a choice and that choice will be clear upon certification.

States have until December 8 to certify the results of their elections.

But what if Pennsylvania’s Republican legislators insist that the results weren’t clear? Would the Supreme Court’s conservative supermajority allow the state’s Republican legislature to choose a Republican slate of electors, even though it’s unconstitutional?

Maybe? Conservatives on the Supreme Court act in bad faith all the time. But consider that Biden has likely won this election with 306 electoral votes. For this gambit to work, legislatures in Pennsylvania and at least two of the other states Biden won would have to submit a slate of Trump electors. The Supreme Court would have to OK this upending of the popular will three times in total. That’s incredibly unlikely and would spark almost immediate civil unrest directed right at the Supreme Court, which has no army to enforce its rulings.

Well, what’s our plan for that?

My dude, I don’t have a plan for “nothing matters anymore.” The end of democratic self-government is not a thing one has a legal plan for. That’s like asking what my plan is for closing a demonic hell mouth that opens in my backyard. Die. My plan would be to die. I’m not Keanu Reeves.

What if Trump fires FBI Director Chris Wray and CIA Director Gina Haspel and gets the “deep state” to keep him in power indefinitely?

I’m not Kiefer Sutherland either. I cannot find the mole.

What if Trump launches a full-scale coup d’état and uses the military to keep him in power?

Then we’re at war. Honestly, what do you want from me? Yes, there is a non-zero chance that Trump’s refusal to accept the results of the election leads to a civil war and, in such a conflict, Abigail Spanberger forms a Vichy government to “compromise” with Trump supporters, and I have to pilot a jet carrying Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez off of Naboo in hopes of finding friendly Jedis willing to fight for our cause.

But there is no legitimate way for Trump to stay in power now. There’s no peaceful way for Trump to stay in power. Either he’s gone on January 20 or he remains atop a military junta willing to use violence to enforce his will.

This makes you feel better?

I find it comforting that a full-scale military takeover is now the only way for Trump to stay in power. Because if there’s one thing I know about Trump, it’s that he is a coward. President Bone Spurs is not the guy to cross the Rubicon.

I look at it this way: Captain von Trapp hiked his enormous family over the Alps to get away; all I have to do is drive my people to the Thousand Islands Bridge while we all sing “Edelweiss.” Thinking much beyond that is pointless.

Well, you could get your lazy ass on the elliptical trainer in case you’re needed to fight.

Don’t start this with me again. Goodbye.

Phroyd

[alteredphoenix]

In Defense of Calia: On the Topic of Misogyny and the Criticism of the Forsaken Double Standard

So I like to browse Twitter a lot, mainly for the art but mostly just to kill time. But I also follow people and websites, and one of those happens to be Wowhead. A couple days ago there was an article documenting Calia’s appearance within the Horde Council in the Shadowlands pre-patch, to which she would voice her opinion on the state of the Horde as well as the uncertain future that Azeroth now faces with the breaking of the Helm of Domination and return of the Scourge.

The WoW community can be...very passionate, or inflammatory, depending on your point of view. The same can be said for any big fandom, in all honesty. But I’m not in a lot of fandoms, and, at least where WoW is concerned, there’s a kind of laser-guided hyperfixation in regards to the introduction and development of its characters. Old or new, the fandom watches them like a hawk, but perhaps none more vigilantly than ones that have been mentioned in-game but have not made an actual appearance itself beyond the tie-in novels.

Three of these characters are Turalyon, Alleria, and Calia. However, Turalyon and Alleria are not given this much scrutiny outside of snide quips that “Turalyon is flat and boring/he’s a zealot/he’s the embodiment of the white savior among the draenei” and “Alleria is a fucking psycho for using the Void and wanting the blood elves to return to the Alliance, she’s just like her sisters, it must run in the blood/she’s arm candy to another, rugged Alliance man” whenever the plot calls for their convenience. I would daresay these parts of the fandom would go as far to say that with their developments given within the story, it would be in Blizzard’s best interests to have never brought them so as to “preserve their memory from before the Activision merger”. On the other hand, I would like to note that this sentiment is echoed ad nauseam for practically every character in WoW...but we’ll touch on that a little bit. This piece isn’t about Turalyon and Alleria or the others.

Rather, this is about Calia, and I wanted to give voice to my opinions on the backlash - or perhaps reception would be a better word - she has been receiving. She was a character I came across reading Arthas: Rise of the Lich King and didn’t think much of afterwards; for all I knew, she had died when Lordaeron and that was the end of the Menethil bloodline. However, with her debut in Legion and unique circumstances that followed culminating from the ending of Before the Storm, as well as being tangentially tied with the Light/Void conflict that’ll come to the forefront in the future, I wanted to keep an eye on her character arc.

Needless to say, when I read the Wowhead post, the comments could basically be described like this:

The WoW Community: Gawd, Blizzard is pushing Calia so hard into the narrative.  She’s just another pathetic dev’s self-insert like Nathanos is, even though we only base this off some harmless, tongue-in-cheek posts on Twitter and we need to vent our anger toward another character who clearly has too much development! She’s everywhere!

Be me, off to the side, remembering she was only present in the Priest Class Hall campaign in Legion; takes part in Before the Storm before getting axed in the Arathi Gathering and being subsequently raised into Lightly undeath by a king, her Archbishop, and a naaru that may have influenced her into going to the Gathering; only shows up very late in BfA right after Sylvanas Blasts Off Again at the end of the War Campaign to reconnect with the Proudmoores and help the kaldorei undead as well as the Forsaken Sylvanas ditches; shadows Lilian and the Horde Council in Shadows Rising, and shows up in Icecrown when the sky cracks open and Bolvar is no longer the Lich King that took up the role her brother was in.

I don’t know what popular fanfiction you folks are reading (or whatever tea you’re drinking; I’ve been looking around since the last Calia post I made and I can’t find it!), but that is not what I would call everywhere.

Look, you’re more than welcome to despise Calia as much as Nathanos over baseless claims and double standards, but let’s not pretend there are other Forsaken that’d fill the hole Sylvanas left behind. Because they can’t. They won’t be able to, because for years Sylvanas made up the core of Forsaken identity. Prior to WotLK they were a race that was reviled and ostracized by the world and looked upon with distrust by everyone including the Horde, even as Hamuul vouched for them and convinced Thrall to give them a chance despite knowing full well how cruel and selfish they could be. Their sole purpose was to exact revenge on the man who took everything away from them, destroyed their lives, and raised them into his service against their will.

And even when Arthas was defeated, they had no other purpose but to conquer Lordaeron, find a way to reproduce their numbers, and reaffirm their loyalty to the Horde - because where the hell else are they going to go? Because even if some Forsaken disagree with Sylvanas’s strict institutions regarding the acceptance of their undeath and the complete rejection of their former, mortal lives, not everyone in the Alliance is going to welcome them with open arms; not everyone is an Anduin or a Jaina. You see this with Genn, who despite accepting that not every Forsaken is bad still holds them in contempt, and with Alleria, who, after spending a thousand years in the Twisting Nether fighting the Burning Legion and thus being removed from the changes that occurred on Azeroth, is justifiably concerned that they are no longer the same person in undeath as they were in life. You see this in the way that some families spurn their loved ones when the Gathering takes place.

So while it’s true that you can say Calia doesn’t have what it takes to be the person the Forsaken need in a post-Sylvanas Azeroth, you must also remember that of all the named Forsaken we know of only Lilian has been given due development. You can’t say the same for Belmont (a loyalist who disregarded Cromush’s warnings about using the plague in Silverpine, as well as fought a losing battle against Tyrande in Darkshore in BfA), Helcular (a presumably former Cult of the Damned affiliate who notably defended Tarren Mill during the Legion’s third incursion), Faranell (another loyalist who created the New Plague and believes Putress is behind Wrathgate, but perhaps unaware of Sylvanas’s possible involvement), and Velonara (who did not want to be want to raised but followed Sylvanas anyway until the Fourth War, eventually siding with the Horde Council). They are merely foot soldiers; outside of maybe Velonara they don’t have the luxury of experiencing the emotional turmoil a newly risen undead goes through the way Lilian Voss does when Thomas Zelling, dying from illness, makes a deal to be raised into undeath and help the Horde in their war if it meant protecting his family. They don’t have the luxury of watching him get executed by the Warchief’s right hand man in front of their eyes the way Lilian and every other Horde leader present did. You would not get the same weight by switching her out with any of them. You could say Lilian would make a decent successor to Sylvanas, and I would not disagree with you. However, Lilian does not have the familial connection that Calia does to Lordaeron, and while Gey’arah poses the question of leadership to her at the Horde War Campaign’s epilogue, it should be noted that Lilian believes there is “another more suited to the task”, preferring to be the hand that would comfort the Forsaken of the trauma of being raised into undeath and, as of Shadows Rising, act as their interim leader.

Then again, neither does Calia. We don’t know where she and Faol were after Lordaeron’s fall (which is one key detail I have seen people not take into account upon their criticisms of her character), but we do know that upon being asked she had refused to reassert her claim to Lordaeron. However, she has common sense enough to know that Faol was not like the other Scourge in the beginning, and later when she met with Elsie, Parqual Fintallas, and the Felstone family.

Whatever happened during that time period prior to Legion, she identifies with the Forsaken. They are, in a way, still her people, regardless of that. This is why I think she would suit the Forsaken best as their leader, not as Queen of Lordaeron that the fandom - or rather, most of the Sylvanas stans - has been so prone to parroting since her intentions to help guide the kaldorei undead and the Lordaeronian Forsaken were first revealed.

And look, I’m a Sylvanas stan, too. But it is very much apparent that Sylvanas only started the Fourth War for her own purposes, has clearly been in an alliance with the Jailer since Cataclysm (yet is hinted to not be entirely subservient to him), and even if she was doing everything up until Shadowlands as an extreme mixture of For the Greater Good and The End Justifies The Means she was still a toxic influence to the more honorable members of the Horde and to the Desolate Council. Even if her behavior were an act to conceal her true intentions, it would still not absolve her completely for all the atrocities she committed and the suffering she caused. Not even Nathanos, whom people have an obsessive, misandrist fixation of being based on someone who’s not despite being in the game for fifteen years prior to that dev joining Blizzard, would not be the best replacement for Sylvanas. Nathanos - the same man who loves Sylvanas so much he would do anything for her even as he pushes aside the brief moments where he hesitates following her orders and expresses shock at her actions - would not have either the Horde’s or the Forsaken’s best interests at heart, for his belongs only to her. After all, you can’t “redeem” a character if the character himself does not regret what they have done and does not want to change for the better.

Which is another thing I have noticed, in the years I have been in the WoW fandom: the concept of “redemption” in the wake of “character assassination” in the wake of events that caused by said characters that are often deemed questionable, which is what I believe makes people conclude the causation to be a source of “bad writing”. This also ties to what I also believe to be the misogynistic undertones the fandom expresses, simply because the events caused by questionable if dubious methods are done by a woman and not a man, which therefore leads to the notion that Blizzard “hates women”. This gives me the impression that these voices would prefer to have Blizzard write their women as someone who are pure and strong and multi-faceted but the minute she performs an action that not everyone is on board with then she is either considered “ruined” or a “dreadlord”, which is merely a cop-out excuse that you only see applied to the female characters (e.g. Jaina) but not the male characters; those men are simply called “evil” or “genocidal”, whether or not they are rightfully so. Then again, men are also considered “ruined” if they are so much as given the spotlight (e.g. Lor’themar in Nazjatar, Baine throughout BfA), but they are nowhere near under as much scrutiny than the women are (unless it’s Garrosh, then you’re going to have to put up with the “Garrosh Did Nothing Wrong” memes). Which leads us back to the hypocrisy the fandom shows towards Calia, a character to whom people call a “Mary Sue” but at the same time an “abomination” who is going to be “Queen of the Forsaken” that is being pushed by Blizzard to make the playerbase hate Sylvanas even more.

And from what we know about Calia, she is neither seeking to become “Queen of the Forsaken” for the foreseeable future nor a “Mary Sue” (if she were, she would’ve succeeded in making all the Forsaken defect to the Alliance and, you know, not die). Perhaps she is made to question if she is capable of providing for the Forsaken (for some, that is, for it was confirmed by Blizzard that not all Forsaken are willing to be lead by another Menethil, and one who had been missing and presumed dead for years at that). Perhaps she is an anomaly, but she is by no means perfection incarnate the fanbase paints her to be.

TLDR Calia Menethil is a character that deserves a chance at getting her character arc and development, and should be judged accordingly instead of jumping the gun.

[akria23]

I’m watching One Spring Night and I cannot be the only one stuck constantly comparing it to Pretty Noona Buys Me Food/ Something In The Rain....

It’s obviously made by the same people and have a lot of the same actors - the last part is where I think they messed up. With the familiar imagery and writing style already there the actors on top of it def just pushes the memories of Something in Rain back to me. This would be fine...if I felt that One Spring Night lived up to his predecessor. I understand why they brought the actors back def Jung Hae In who is so golden for dramas like these but it’s deluded the separation process. My issues with One Spring Night stems from very specific placements:

* Chemistry

* Relationship building

* Empathy

Jung Hae In chemistry with Son Ye Jin from SITR was preferable for me. The want, the yearning was tangible. The newness the transition from friendship to relationship was awkward and raw but that’s what made it feel real. Both Hae In & Ye Jin are great facial actors and somehow have this ability to transition their facial work into an aura of emotion around the character they’re playing.

I think a part of the chemistry issue is the relationship building - when it came to Joon Hee & Jin Ah In SITR we went through a real transit of emotional sand relationship status. The newness of their relationship, the old was of their relationship (friendship) the elation/happiness/cloud nine aspect so when it came to the struggle and pain I understood why they put their feet in the dirt and fought back, they they couldn’t let go, why they worried about their circumstances. When it comes to OSN they don’t get that in the start. Instead of a lot of struggle to even just be around each other and because they realfuse to be ‘bad’ people and engage in cheating we as viewers are stuck watching them engage in this battle of I just wanna see you but I can’t without any good romantic moments to beef up that desire. In fact they’ve been stuck on this ride so long I’ve forgotten why they even decided they liked one another and why they’ve decided it’s too hard to let go of someone who lose basically a stranger. They’ve put themselves on selves that as a viewer I find myself annoyed with because they don’t in fact have to be there and this is where my lack of empathy comes in.

With SITR I could understand the the desire of hiding and down playing their relationship and not wanting to face the demon in front of them (her family and society as a whole) and while I also understand the wall and the hard place the leads in OSN have places themselves I also find their situation one they could easily walk out of. Jeong In claims she doesn’t want to be a cheater but then refuses to put her foot down and really end things with her boyfriend. Will he throw a tantrum, cause a scene, and be a a-hole? YES! But so what? You can’t stand him he don’t actually love you and yet she seems willing to stay in this baseless relationship until he’s done with her. And at this point the reason it seems like she’s wants her cake and to eat it to is because the man she really wants has cirmstances that’s not deemed acceptable by society measures - even while claiming she’s not bothered by those same circumstances.

I just find myself unable to sympathize with her situation when she welds all the power. She does not care about her boyfriend so her struggle to drag this situation out makes it worse because it won’t matter if she cheats physically by the time he finds out...I guess the the biggest issue I’m having here is that while it’s reminding me of SITR - I could understand the hardship of the lead where I find that lacking in OSN because one was stuck between two people she loved while the other is stuck between the known and the unknown. And I don’t get why she’s struggling so hard to maintain a known she hates - even as I understand the general message the writer is trying to get across as a viewer I feel like I’ve been stuck on this part of the ride so long I’m unsure I want to even make it to the next part....

[x0401x]

Wow, I appreciate the essay that proved no point, thank you. I wonder how you could've mistaken I meant IN ALL YOUR POSTS when all I was talking about was how you literally just talked about MasaMina in the flower post. It's more beyond me how badly you comprehended my ask. The point abut me not giving sources is so you could look it up yourself because why would I let someone copy my hard-worked homework, noh? Maybe if you properly did research then you'd have a much proper analysis on it.

Anyway.

Honey, it seems you still don’t get it: you’re the one who made the claim, so you’re the one who has to prove your point, which you haven’t. You can’t just accuse someone of something without any argument and then tell them to prove otherwise. That’s not how it works.

Oh, that. I read “posts” by accident. I stayed up late to answer you, so my head wasn’t working straight. But I didn’t mistake any of the rest, so don’t try to generalize. Also, my answer remains the same. I don’t think I talked about them more than I should, because there isn’t a limit to how much I should talk about them. I’ll talk about them as much as I want because it’s my own post.

Lmfao, “hard-worked homework”. Right, visting a site is so much work. If you were actually trying to be constructive with these asks, you’d at least name the sources. All that happens if I google what I had already googled is that I find the exact same results, obviously. It’s impossible that you haven’t realized this much. Your claim remains baseless.

Also, don’t worry, I read your post through and through which is exactly why I knew how much of the post you were wrong. You even got some of the flowers wrong, most especially Masa-san’s. And moreover, I see no point, still, in putting them together, because as I’ve mentioned, they are individual characters and Kyoani gave them separate flowers. I don’t know how you automatically thought of them instead of generalizing the more important people around them unless you were clearly ship-biased.

Yet you were and still are so vague about it. Just tell me already what was wrong so I can fix it instead of repeating yourself like a broken disk.

The meanings of their flowers are directly linked to each other, and most of them represent the two at the same time. If I were to do what you say, at most, I’d only separate them by the flowers of the bonus artworks and write about the others as a set, but that doesn’t change the fact that the interpretations of one would cite the other so it makes no difference.

You don’t know why? I just told you in the examples from my previous answer.

“Generalizing the more important people around them”? Are you implying that there’s some sort of ranking of who’s more important to who and suggesting that Minato and Masaki’s relationship is less important to themselves than other relationships? Do you perhaps not realize that their relationship is the main one of the story? If so, then I can only assume that you didn’t read the novel.

I don’t really care much if you post MasaMina on end because I know you roll with that, but pushing it on a generalized post where EVERYONE is supposedly involved, I’m not sure what other un-rude term I could call it, tbh. I’m not even sure if I should be the one you should call a child between us i you’re the one who hates on something because your ship wasn’t involved in it. Of course, you would deny because you’re “so smart” but from the way you rant about it, it clearly shows. That’s sad.

It’s not a generalized post, whatever you mean by that. And I fail to see how all the characters being involved equals Masaki and Minato’s flowers having nothing to do with one another.

I would deny simply because it’s not true, lol. I’m not hating on anything, you are. I wouldn’t at all hate it if the symbolism around Minato and Masaki had nothing to do with each other, but it does and that’s not subjective. I already explained how they are involved, but I have no way of forcing it through your thick skull. If you don’t want to understand, you just won’t.

I don’t get why you keep trying to imply that I’m dumb or that I try to act intelligent. Your blatant dislike of my person is the most confusing part of your asks, tbh.

I wasn’t desperate to cover up anything, I know what I wrote you, I have copies in case tumblr deletes it, too ‘cause that happens. Maybe it was partial anon hate but also because I wanted to point out that your supposed analysis of a general thing for Tsurune is wrong and I felt bad for the people who saw/see it. Believing false information. I suggested disclaimer that it was still, nonetheless, your opinion because whether you studied it or not, the information is still not originally yours.

“Maybe” and “partial” are deliberate choices of wording. You indirectly insulted me, came up with accusations all of a sudden, literally tried to corner me, threw a fit because I didn’t reply right away, made false assumptions about me and acted extremely condenscending all along. It was anon hate. Don’t try to smooth it out and just say it like it is.

Stop trying to make it seem as if you being upset with it equals that a lot of people are upset. You’re the only one to ever complain about that post.

It’s not my opinion, and the information not coming originally from me doesn’t make it an opinion (it’s the opposite, actually). The information also doesn’t originally come from the people who host flower-related sites. Flower language has existed for literal centuries.

And I will repeat, interpretting Masa-san and Minato’s flowers are NOT IMPOSSIBLE. You just REFUSE to do it because you were, i don’t know, pushing your ship? You wanted to? But mind you, your post is Tsurune-general related. Masa-san and Minato don’t just have each other; they have families they love, friends they care for, any one of them cou;d’ve been what the flower is for. But you mainly focused on them for no valid reason. Wouldn’t you think that’s being rude?

It’s not rude, lol. That’s probably not the word you’re looking for. But no word of negative connotation applies here anyway.

So what if the post is about all the characters? I don’t see why that’s a reason for me not to relate their flowers to one another when they are, in fact, related. Besides, I talked more about them because there’s more symbolism surrounding them. Can’t help that 90% of the flower language used in the books is for their relationship.

Again, see the examples I used in my other response. Who was it that Masaki met in middle school and then met again as an adult? Whose smile is Minato weak to? There isn’t any other character who can be used as answer to these questions. This isn’t a matter of opinion. It’s literally what the author wrote.

You mentioned their bonds but neglected the relationship of the characs that appeared in the latter part of the flower post. I honestly couldn’t go past that post without reading about Masa-san and Minato but never really seeing other names get mentioned again. I didn’t mind my embarrassment tbh, if that’s anything to be embarrassed about. I just hope you’ll admit to being wrong for once, though. I’m not expecting an apology, but truth. Because I feel bad for the ones seeing your post.

I didn’t. I mentioned the team in Minato’s and Akihiro in Masaki’s Blu-ray artwork flowers. But I couldn’t see how anyone else applied to the flower language of the book.

Why do you keep repeating the things I said (and yet act like you’re not being childish)? I don’t have to apologize, lmao. You’re the offender here.

I’m certainly not wrong for interpreting things based on canon, and I write my posts the way I see fit, because my blog. Stop trying to force me into modifying my post to your wishes. That’s entitled as hell. Just make an account to write your own posts, if you really don’t have one, that is. Otherwise, die mad about me.

I appreciate you called me trying to point out your wrongs as assholery childishness. Now I’m just wondering if you’ll show my asks to prove you’re right or to prove I’m a child. I don’t really mind, I’m beyond it. As you’ve said, I am an asshole, best to live up with it, I don’t recall calling you anything, however. And to be clear, I’m not an anti-MasaMina before you point that out.

It’s assholery because you refuse to specify it and don’t present evidence to back it up, just keep saying that I’m wrong and biased. That’s not “pointing out” anything, it’s flaming, pure and simple.

Oh, so you think calling me names would be the only thing that defines it as assholery and anything else is fair game. That explains it all.

I don’t care whether or not you’re anti-MasaMina, honestly.

Okay, here they go:

Full of shade. Cue other three of those.

This one was doing fine, but then the tantrum started:

And then you came back pretending that nothing had happened:

I guess you’re gonna say that I should learn to take criticism or use some other bigoted argument. This is anon hate. Baseless, improductive, entitled and purely offensive. Case closed.

Funny the first one about the tag wasn't even mine. Oh I've read the novel, don't worry, it's kind of why I'm countering your opinions right now. I never said Masa-san and Minato's relationship was any less important but the story isn't even about them. The title says what the story is about. Masa-san is merely one of the many links of relationships Minato could have so the point stands. They're not a set. I'm more wondering if you've read it yourself.

Fixed that now.

Right, what the author writes is totally my opinion.

The story is literally about them. It’s literally the main relationship. What’re you even saying???

You say “merely” as if he doesn’t make that much of a difference when he was literally the trigger to everything.

You bet I did, that’s why I quote it directly all the time, which you don’t do ever.

I see that this discussion has no way of advancing because you don’t really seem to pay attention to my responses. My guess is that you’ll continue saying the same stuff, which would force me to do the same because there’s literally nothing else I can tell you.

I don’t mind answering other asks, but the flower post is out of question. It’s a waste of my time saying the same stuff again and again. This topic is over for me. Just refer back to the post and our whole discussion if you think otherwise.

[migleefulmoments]

Sometimes I just can’t keep quiet...

Sometimes I just can’t let a comment go. This is one of them. 

From the CC fandom:

Anonymous asked:

Being a Darren fan is like having a constant state of whiplash. You have Team/D & Darren/D and the two have VERY different narratives. You have to “read between” the lines. I honestly take everything he does and says with a grain of salt. EVENTUALLY and HOPEFULLY the truth will come out - pun intended. Unless he plans to be engaged for 7+ years or he takes it to the next level?? This can’t last forever. Thoughts???

Utter and complete whiplash nonnie. It is hard to be a D fan if you pay attention because either he is a walking contradiction or there is a war going on behind the scenes.

Team Shit has tried for years to mold an image of D as a straight bro that is kind of a jerk and very much in love with a woman who acts like a spoiled, rich brat that thinks she is better than every one else and who has painted a public image of someone that does not work and instead prefers to party all the time.  And that reflects on D,  

D wants you to see the fun loving guy who fully embraces all parts of himself and wants to play queer and is not afraid to embrace his feminine side when appropriate.  But also loves sports, is multi-talented but not egotistical. Who treats the people in his path like gold, including his family, friends, colleagues, and fans.  

I agree, this has to end soon. There is no 7 year encage.  They have already pushed the planning to fandom as if it is happening soon.  And every weekend that is not planned is looked to as a possible wedding weekend.  

He either says I do or I don’t really soon. I hope the D he has shown us time and again, the one who has been closeted against his will and rebelled for years, prevails and he wins. Because the alternative is a massive defeat I don’t think he can recover from it.

It is hard to be a D fan if you pay attention because either he is a walking contradiction or there is a war going on behind the scenes. The ONLY reason he is a walking contradiction is because the CC fandom refuses to listen to Darren. They collectively refuse to hear his truth as they obsessively rewrite his story to fit their CrissColfer fantasy. The fandom refuses to accept that Darren is exactly who Darren says he is. They spend their time and energy spinning wild tales about how Darren Criss ISN’T exactly who Darren Criss is. The Darren they are left with, ccDarren is a walking contradiction...he is an amalgamation of their fantasy Darren and anything the real Darren does or says that is “gay enough” for them to accept. Everything Darren does that isn’t gay enough is immediately explained away, erased from his story.  When someone else is writing your story, you will be a walking contradiction. 

“If you are paying attention” is a code for “if you are writing Darren’s story”

Team Shit has tried for years to mold an image of D as a straight bro that is kind of a jerk and very much in love with a woman who acts like a spoiled, rich brat that thinks she is better than every one else and who has painted a public image of someone that does not work and instead prefers to party all the time.  And that reflects on D. Wow..so much to unpack. 

Team shit has tried...to mold Darren” Oh, the projection that is happening in that sentence. Darren is a strong man who is very comfortable in his own skin. Nobody is molding him into anything he isn’t already. It’s shameful that ccDarren is a spineless, gullible wuss without a backbone. The only people desperately trying to “mold him” into something he isn’t is the CC family.

“.. as a straight bro that is kind of a jerk and very much in love with a woman” 

“Straight bro”? Yes, Darren is straight. He has said so for 9 years. Listen to him, it is the least you can do.  EVERYONE HAS THE RIGHT TO DETERMINE THEIR OWN SEXUALITY. He has said for 9 years that he is straight. He has said for 9 years that he is dating Mia. For a year he has said that he is engaged to Mia. He is queer only in the CCers’ own twisted fantasy.

“Kind of a jerk”? well I guess if you desperately want him to be queer and he refuse to play along, then I would imagine you can see him as a jerk. 

“...very much in love with a woman”? He has been consistent with messaging on his love for Mia for many years now. I’m not sure exactly how this is a bad thing, other than it is incongruent with the CCer’s fantasy that two men -who never dated in real life- are secretly in love. The CCers’ inability to distinguish a scripted, TV couple from real life as the heart of the matter.

“...a woman who acts like a spoiled, rich brat that thinks she is better than every one else”  Here we come to the misogyny. Accusing Mia of being a “spoiled, rich brat” who “thinks she is better than every one else” and “who has panted a public image of someone that does not work” and “instead prefers to party all the time” when in fact there is nothing to suggest any of this is true is misogyny. They are nothing more than purely mean-spirited accusations rooted in jealousy and misogyny. We don’t know enough about Mia to know whether she is a “spoiled, rich brat”. What we do know is that Darren says lovely things about her and the impact she has had on his life. We know that both Darren’s friends and her friends say very sweet things about her.  The CCers dismiss them all as being “contractual obligations”as if that is a thing. Nobody is getting their friends to sign contracts to praise their girlfriend or themselves. Mia barley speaks and certainly hasn’t said enough publicly for fans to claim she is anything good or bad. 

“... believes she is better than every one else...” Um...again, Mia speaks very rarely in public, making this statement simply baseless. It is the ugly green monster of jealousy speaking. Using stereotypical derogatory terms to describe a woman simply because it suits your fantasy is the definition of misogyny.   

 “...and who has painted a public image of someone that does not work and instead prefers to party all the time” No, Mia has never “painted an image of someone who does not work”. She has worked most of the time we have known of her and then she opened a bar. Owning a bar is actually a job even if ajw and the CC fandom can’t see it on social media. But ultimately, It doesn’t matter if she has job or not-Darren and Mia’s financial arrangements within their relationship is not anyone else’s business. Mia’s value isn’t based on her career earnings or the status of her job- no matter how may times ajw claims they are. Mia’s job or lack of one has NO reflection on Darren as a human being. As for “preferring to party”? That is literally another completely made up CC trope. 

“She reflects badly on Darren”? The idea that Mia is supposed to worry that she is a negative reflection on Darren is another misogynistic, 1850′s belief-when women were unable to vote and seen as property of their husband. Mia is an independent woman, a person that Darren loves for who she is. If he is worried about how she reflects on him, then he is an asshole. The majority of the world has no idea who Darren loves and only the most diehard fans even see Mia. Darren tells us he loves her and as fans, that is the only thing that matters. 

“D wants you to see the fun loving guy who fully embraces all parts of himself...” Um, sure, Darren wants people to see him for who he is and he is very comfortable in his skin. What part of Darren in the last year was not fun loving? I don’t get who they are seeing.  

“...and wants to play queer and is not afraid to embrace his feminine side when appropriate” No, he isn’t afraid to embrace his feminine side...that doesn’t mean he is gay. He wants to play queer? Darren has never said that playing queer characters is a career goal of his...in fact, he said the opposite because he understands representation. He has played queer characters in his 3 biggest roles and it’s getting redundant. Nobody wants to be typecast. All actors want to stretch themselves and doing new things is part of that. If he was in the closet then he really has no business playing queer characters. Claiming that Darren wants to play queer characters is a literally ajw putting words in Darren’s mouth based on her CC fantasy while dismissing the importance of representation. 

“But also loves sports, is multi-talented but not egotistical. Who treats the people in his path like gold, including his family, friends, colleagues, and fans”. He’s queer, acts like a girl but he loves sports....can she be anymore  stereotypical and reductive? I’m always shocked when they make statements like this; I never think they can stoop lower and they always do.  

“...he’s not egotistical”? Newsflash, Darren has an ego. Putting your fantasy of perfection onto a real flawed human being is silly and immature.  

“Who treats the people in his path like gold, including his family, friends, colleagues, and fans”  Does Darren treat everyone “like gold”? IDK.  How could we know?  We know that he treats fans well and he has a lot of friends. But we don’t know how he treats people in his life. He is literally a stranger to all of us.  Colleagues say nice things about him but it’s all PR, after all? Darren isn’t perfect, he is a real person with real flaws. Proclaiming is perfect is immature.   

If you put together statements from various posts from the last few days, you get a picture of the how the CC Fantasy is far removed from reality. Their fantasy reads but in a stereotypical over-the-top romance novel except they are dealing with real people. 

“is multi-talented but not egotistical. Who treats the people in his path like gold, including his family, friends, colleagues, and fans... the one who has been closeted against his will and rebelled for years, prevails and he wins....He will do what he needs to do for those he loves. And that includes fighting a foe that we will never know the depth of... (cue the lyrics to The Impossible Dream). This song always comes back to haunt me in relationship to D. He lives it, he breathes it, he feels it on a daily bases. Soon he will find he will reach the reachable star....D isn’t straight, that is a fact and he has a male partner.  If you pay attention to the details, it is really clear....To those who know he is  closeted (a fact), he looked like a coward and it made it sound like he had CHOSEN to be closeted and it is the path he will be continuing to chose....While D is far from perfect, he is at war and his team is actively working against him...The hole is deep. D must start to climb out of it. The time is now. The encage must be broken shortly after the SAGs. If not, I honestly fear for him and his ability to come out anytime in the next 10 years and frankly, having observed him for a really long time, I don’t think he would survive a continued alliance with M, who is pure poison to him, or a continued alliance with RR and SS..I hope my gut is right and that the D I have watched for so long prevails and wins this war. But while the final battles are being waged, everything must be viewed from the perspective of a fight going on and realizing D is not in control of things published in his name. But despite that, he chooses to continue to do the things he loves, despite them, including channeling his inner Mar/iah gloriously.

Yeah, so not based in reality at all.

[theaccidentalstepmom]

Breakups suck. I’ve had a few- less than most but more than many. After a breakup my feelings for the other person lie somewhere between heartbroken, totally ready to move on and hoping the other person’s fingers grow fishhooks and that they also develop a strong itch in their genitals. Somewhere in there...

There are those select humans that can somehow remain friends with their exes and genuinely support them. I admire those people and I hope to be one of those people when I grow up. That said it does take two to make that work. But in general I think those people are on a different plane and there probably don’t need to read this blog. Actually no one needs to read this blog... who reads blogs anymore? Let’s be honest this is just a glorified online journal for me to unpack the crazy making in my life. But I digress...

Breakups happen. Wish them fortune or ill but eventually you move on. Right? Sure... assuming you CAN actually make a clean break. Assuming you don’t live/work/go to school together. Assuming you’re not married (because divorcing someone is a undoing a legal contract and that doesn’t happen in a vacuum). Also assuming there’s not a child involved because then that person that you’d much happier never having to see again EVER is someone you are forced to continue interacting with for the next 18 (minus your youngest child’s age) years longer.

We have a triple threat and that’s where our story begins...

This isn’t our love story (or is it?). Well okay... a quick background. It’s 1995, Wilson high school, Portland Oregon: I’m a Senior he’s a Junior. We didn’t date but we both liked one another- but I had a boyfriend and having a crush on two boys was too much for me to handle!! I graduated, went to college, loved my life. No idea what happened to him. 12 years later years and I’d just moved to SF and who do I see on the bus? What?? Still cute, he just moved to SF from DC after a few years living in Iowa... with his wife. He’s married. Of course he is. Cool let’s be Facebook friends and I’ll see you never. Berceuse WTF would I say if I ever met your wife? “Nice to meet you I had a big crush on your husband in high school”. That’s just awkward.

But we did exchange numbers. He was a chef and I was a waitress so when he got a new job he might text me and tell me to stop by (I never did) or if we needed a new line cook I’d reach out to him (he never replied). At some point on Facebook I saw that they had a kid. Cute little thing with a buttload of hair.

Fast forward 2.5 years. It’s Valentine’s Day and I’m showing a couple friends who aregg bet single how Tinder works: “Oh no... he’s no good. See you just swipe left- hard left!”. He was like the 3rd guy that pulled up. We chatted back and forth through the app a couple times then I just texted him because I had his number and I’m paranoid about conversations through apps. (I just imagine people who work for Tinder reading them and laughing their asses off at my attempts to play it cool.) Anyways, a week later we went on our first date and it was pretty much game over for me.

He was 8 months out of a 10 year relationship and had a toddler why am I not running the other direction? That’s a great question and I have no good answer. Or at least not a sexy one... I’m attracted to vulnerable men? They’re like my catnip: “Come here kitty- Mama like”!

His son was 2.5 when we started dating. I knew I was dating a man with a child and I knew exactly what that meant. I babysat A LOT and I was a nanny for 5 years. It’s not the same thing as being a parent by any means. But compared to an average childless woman I did have a better understanding of what I was getting into and what spending hours with a toddler was like. I knew that if we were going to be in a relationship the kid comes first, I’m replaceable the child is not.

His ex was trying to move to Hawaii to live with her new boyfriend and wanted to take their son. That’s a hard no. Absolutely not. R had already filed for divorce but that got sidelined by custody. She hired a more aggressive attorney and insisted she would be taking their son. When describing his ex and her behavior R was throwing around with like crazy and narcissist and borderline.

Okay, okay... this situation is really stressful. I’m sure she’s not that bad- you married her right? Stress does not bring out the best in people’s personalities- quite the opposite. It’s hard to think straight. This is probably situational- I’m sure she’ll calm down soon. Maybe try phrasing your text this way so she doesn’t get defensive- I’m sure she’ll be reasonable if you just explain it really clearly...

Bahahaha.

I spent months empathizing with her and trying to help R better communicate with her. All in vain- it toa long time to realize she doesn’t want to communicate or compromise she just wants her way. And any attempt to have an open honest discussion is just ammunition for her to use against you in a future conversation.

If she asks R for a favor and his answer is no she’ll twist the conversation into her being victimized.

If she asks R for a favor and his answer is yes she’ll twist the situation and say that she actually did him a favor.

If R asks her for a favor she ignores him, calls him names and/or tells R he’s harassing her.

To be clear, most of the time she doesn’t ASK- she demands.

If R agrees to something once he has to agree in the future it or he’s a hypocrit.

She flat out remembers things wrong and when R shows her the screenshots of the text she wrote proving she’s m wrong she says he’s being petty.

When R asks her to discuss child related issues directly with him rather than asking their 4 year old son to communicate the message to him she tells R he’s being difficult.

When it’s her custodial time and R has a scheduled FT she bribed their son with candy or ice cream to end the call early. (He can have it after he’s done).

I feel like we’re in an alternate reality. She’s constantly coming after R legally with baseless claims. She projects all the shit she does to R and accuses him of doing it to her!! We read her motions and were like “What’s is she talking about? R didn’t do that to her she’s doing that to R!”. And no is not a misinterpretation and they’re both doing it- she’s doing it and accusing him of doing it. It’s crazy making.

Claim: R refuses to communicate with her and insists on going through attorneys.

False. She has ZERO emails or texts to back this up- they agreed to communicate via text and email. She hasn’t sent a single email or text to R to “discuss” anything so how is he refusing to communicate? R has written numerous long and detailed emails to her for years and even more over the past 10 months of Covid trying to communicate and co-parent with her, share information and get schedules finalized without the courts involvement and her responses are dismissive and often only one sentence. His attorney and her attorney even tried to resolve issues without the court but she refused to comply and court was the last resort.

Claim: wasn’t even a claim really, mores demand that both parents needing to be flexible about scheduled FaceTimes in their child is swimming or playing during that time and also be accommodating if the other parent wants to do an unscheduled call they can.

Reality: Totally... R has never denied her a FT, has been flexible when she’s asked to reschedule and he’s sent MULTIPLE emails to her saying she can do an unscheduled FT anytime she wants (just give him a heads up). She’s done maybe 4 unscheduled FaceTimes in 2 years. We don’t plan any activities during her scheduled call time because it’s her scheduled time... so her calls don’t ever “interrupt” anything. Please, I beg you, show any evidence to the contrary.

Oh and while she’s looking for evidence that doesn’t exist I’d like to show the email she just sent from December 2020 telling R that when their son was with her during Christmas he was ONLY allowed to FaceTime during his scheduled time of 6:40-8. No “bullshit” unscheduled FaceTimes calls like he did last summer when he called their son “every day” it was “harassment”.

(Calling every day would have been excessive, but not harassment. But he didn’t call every day. He had 2 scheduled FaceTimes per week by court order and in addition he called 1 extra day a week (so three calls a week). Also, important to point out is that their son, who primarily lives with his father, was going to not see his father for three months because of conflicting language in the ruling and delays in getting it clarified due to COVID and Jennie’s refusal to discuss shortening the time to what they’d agreed to.

He always texted her before his scheduled FaceTime to confirm the time would work and it wouldn’t conflict with activities they’d planned. But even though it was a scheduled call it always seemed to interrupt something fun that their son was doing: swimming, hiking, skateboarding. Funny how when she asked him to push back his call 2 hours he STILL was interrupting fun plans. It’s his SCHEDUKED time- plan your shit on a different day OR if you can’t contact R ahead of time to reschedule the FaceTime so it doesn’t conflict or interrupt your plans.

As for unscheduled FaceTimes he’d text in the morning asking to do a FaceTime in the afternoon (so giving her at least 3 or 4 hours notice so she can pick a time that works for her). She wouldn’t reply, instead he’d just immediately get a FaceTime call. To her credit she doesn’t refuse the calls and conveniently their son is often immediately available.

But it’s funny how if she knows R’s gonna call she seem to have plans, but when she doesn’t know he’s going to call she’s just sitting around the house doing jack shit.

She is bananas.

[techcrunchappcom]

New Post has been published on https://techcrunchapp.com/trump-meets-michigan-leaders-in-bid-to-subvert-election-news-sports-jobs/

Trump meets Michigan leaders in bid to subvert election | News, Sports, Jobs

David Eggert/AP Photo In this Jan. 30 photo, Senate Majority Leader Mike Shirkey, R-Clarklake, right, and House Speaker Lee Chatfield, R-Levering, left, speak to the media at the Michigan Capitol in Lansing, Mich.

WASHINGTON — Michigan state legislators headed to the White House on Friday as President Donald Trump made an extraordinary and sure-to-be futile attempt to block Joe Biden’s victory in the battleground state and subvert the results of the 2020 presidential election.

The state has yet to certify its results for Biden, who won Michigan by more than 154,000 votes, according to unofficial results. Trump and his allies have been trying to convince judges and lawmakers in the state to set aside the popular vote and swap in Republican-chosen electors.

The president personally called two county canvass board officials earlier this week who had refused to certify the results in Wayne County, the state’s most populous county and one that overwhelmingly favored Biden. The two GOP officials eventually agreed to certify the results, but following Trump’s call, they later said they had second thoughts.

Then Trump invited Republican state legislators to Washington. As he departed Detroit for Washington on Friday morning, state Senate Majority Leader Mike Shirkey was swarmed by activists bearing signs that read: “Respect the Vote” and “Protect Democracy.” House Speaker Lee Chatfield was also headed to D.C., as were at least two other GOP leaders.

“What this president is doing unconscionable,” said former Bush administration official Christine Todd Whitman. “It is unacceptable. It’s un-American and it’s a dereliction of his duty.”

White House press secretary Kayleigh McEnany said it was “not an advocacy meeting” and insisted Trump “routinely meets with lawmakers from across the country.” But such meetings are in fact rare, particularly now as Trump has maintained a low-profile since his electoral loss to Biden.

Some Michigan legislators have reported being deluged with calls and emails from Trump supporters demanding that they intervene. The House GOP caucus has prepared a 732-word stock response that pushes back, stating that state law clearly requires that electors be nominated by the party that wins the most votes.

“The law does not allow for the nomination or approval of alternative electors,” the email states.

Chatfield tweeted Friday afternoon before the planned meeting with Trump: “No matter the party, when you have an opportunity to meet with the President of the United States, of course you take it. I won’t apologize for that. In fact, I’m honored to speak with POTUS and proud to meet with him. And I look forward to our conversation.”

U.S. Rep. Debbie Dingell, D-Mich., whose district includes portions of Wayne County, said Trump was totally out of line.

“Let me be very clear, this goes beyond partisan politics, and it’s an attempt to subvert our democracy and undermine the will of Michigan voters,” Dingell said.

The Michigan effort is among multiple last-ditch tactics Trump and his allies are using to challenge his defeat. His team also has suggested in a legal challenge that Pennsylvania set aside the popular vote there and pressured county officials in Arizona to delay certifying vote tallies. At the White House, discussions were underway about extending an invite to Pennsylvania’s Republican legislative leadership as well.

Election law experts see it all as the last, dying gasps of the Trump campaign and say Biden is certain to walk into the Oval Office come January. But there is great concern that Trump’s effort is doing real damage to public faith in the integrity of U.S. elections.

Specialists on Michigan election law said the state Board of Canvassers is limited in scope and its primary responsibility is to certify the results.

“Their duties are to receive the canvas and certify the canvas, that’s it,” said John Pirich, a former assistant attorney general who now teaches at Michigan State University Law School. “There should be no dispute on what they can or cannot do. The statute is absolutely clear.”

“They have absolutely no power to investigate allegations, theories or any half-brained kind of arguments that are being thrown around,” Pirich said.

Sen. Mitt Romney of Utah, one of Trump’s most vocal GOP critics, accused Trump of resorting to “overt pressure on state and local officials to subvert the will of the people and overturn the election.” Romney added: “It is difficult to imagine a worse, more undemocratic action by a sitting American President.”

Trump’s own election security agency has declared the 2020 presidential election to have been the most secure in history. Days after that statement was issued, Trump fired the agency’s leader.

The increasingly desperate and erratic moves have no reasonable chance of changing the outcome of the 2020 election, in which Biden has now received more votes than any other presidential candidate in history and has clinched the 270 Electoral College votes needed to win.

But the Republican president’s constant barrage of baseless claims, his work to personally sway local officials who certify votes and his allies’ refusal to admit he lost is likely to have a lasting negative impact on the country. Legions of his supporters don’t believe he lost.

The two GOP canvassers in Michigan’s Wayne County said in a statement late Wednesday they lacked confidence that the election was fair and impartial. But there has been no evidence of impropriety or fraud in Michigan, election officials have said.

Trump’s allies have homed in on the way that the president’s early lead in Michigan and some other states on election night slipped away as later votes came, casting it as evidence of something nefarious.

But a massive influx of mail-in ballots because of the coronavirus pandemic leaned largely to Biden, who encouraged his supporters to vote by mail, and those votes were the last to be counted. So it appeared Trump had an edge when he really didn’t.

Michigan’s four-member state canvassing board, made up of two Democrats and two Republicans, is expected to meet Monday to determine the results of the election after receiving totals from all 83 counties. If it does not certify Biden’s victory, it is likely a court would order the members to do so.

The Michigan Legislature would be called on to select electors if Trump succeeded in convincing the board not to certify the results.

Biden legal adviser Bob Bauer said Trump’s efforts are harmful to democracy but have no chance of success, though he stopped short of characterizing the legality of them.

“It’s an abuse of office,” he said. It’s an open attempt to intimidate election officials, it’s absolutely appalling. … It’s also pathetic.”

Trump personal attorney Rudy Giuliani and others held a press conference Thursday to allege a widespread Democratic election conspiracy involving multiple states and suspect voting machines. But election officials across the country have said repeatedly there was no widespread fraud.

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[theycallme-tunathot]

What the Fates Will Allow  ||   [Part 1.]

Hoseok, son of Hermes

Synopsis: Hoseok is called into the director’s office after writing an article about two of the compound’s recruits going missing. Author’s Note: So here’s the first part. I’m so excited to finally start writing this and posting it. It’s taken me months to construct and put together so I hope you guys enjoy it. Let me know what you think! Gif credit is here.

"Don’t play dumb, it looks all too convincing on you.”

"This needs some explaining."

A small zine landed with an anticlimactic thud in front of the younger man seated in the director's office.

It was strange, he thought. He worked on this weekly zine for the last year he was here at the compound but somehow now everyone was buzzing about the damn thing. But to be fair, the topics he usually wrote about was hardly juicy compared to what he just published in this week's edition.

Blinking innocently, he stared clueless back at the director.

"I'm not sure what you mean..." He trailed off, shaking his head for added effect.

Scoffing humorlessly, the director sighed deeply. "Don't play dumb, it looks all too convincing on you."

He rolled his eyes, equally as unamused as the man in front of him.

"Hoseok, I'm trying to understand how this story ended up splashed on the front page of the zine."

"It came to my attention," he answered with ease.

"Obviously."

"Then what more do we have to talk about?"

"We have plenty to discuss."

Hoseok tilted his head, his orange hair ruffling with the movement. He peered back at the superior, almost certain he had the line to get him off the hook this time. "Considering I have proof this story is true, I'm sure you have more important things to spend your time on."

The director's mouth only tightened as he shifted in his large chair. "This is a pretty serious incident too."

"Me printing a story about how two members of the Hades block just disappeared into thin air is equally as serious a topic as having two recruits go missing for two weeks?"

"You're overstepping your boundaries Hoseok."

It was so easy to forget how sharp the power structure was divided up when this place was supposed to feel like home, Hoseok thought dryly.

If he was being honest with himself, he didn’t hate it here--not completely at least. He understood that he, much like everyone who worked at the compound, didn’t have much choice in being here. It’s not like Hoseok had a buffet of options and this just seemed like the least risky. He, like the others, burned every bridge he ever built and this was the last place he had available to him.

The compound was much like a safe haven for demigods, a place where grown children of the Greek mythological deities could go. If the outside world became too unsafe or left them incomplete, the compound served as a place for descendants like Hoseok to retreat.

But, it came with caveats. This wasn’t some rehab or retreat spa. No one on this compound came to stay without working for their place. Everyone had a job, most went on missions related to helping keep the world of mythological gods a secret and everyone did their part to keep the compound running.

In many ways, Director Gong was a nanny for his bosses. He recruited from a list made directly by concerned parents. As soon as they saw one of their earthly children suffering, they gave him a name and location. If the demigod accepted, they were brought here and it was Director Gong’s job to ensure they were safe.

And a this particular moment, it seemed the director wasn’t living up to the standards given to him, Hoseok thought.

The younger man scoffed at the elder, shaking his head. Director Gong never really could see the big picture. It was always funny how he handled what he coined "incidents." Even calling them incidents was funny to Hoseok. He was running a glorified daycare and two of his charges were missing. And then he has the gall to call it an incident. Fucking unbelievable, this guy.

"I'm doing what you've allowed me to do, which is run this inter-corporate zine where I keep everyone updated on news--"

"You mean gossip," Director Gong cut in, his dark eyes narrowing combatively.

Hoseok shifted in his chair, upset he was interrupted, but even more upset about his work being dubbed gossip. Jaw tensing, he decided not to speak his mind. At least not with such an obvious provocation on the director's part. He would need to push another button if he wanted to piss him off.

"You know very well this is idle chatter, baseless and with no evidence to prove or substantiate a single claim."

"Do I?"  

"What did I tell you about feigning dumb?"

"You said it suited me," Hoseok replied, a sarcastic smile stretching his lips slightly.

"Either way, I need you to collect all the copies around the compound and destroy them."

There was a moment where Hoseok was sure his entire mood was slipping into some bottomless pit. He could feel his chest tighten uncomfortably and his stomach give a sickening lurch against his spine at the mention of destroying the zine. How could he ask such a thing?  

Hoseok dedicated so much time and effort creating these weekly editions. He couldn't count the amount of nights he barely got through dinner because he promised a source an interview. He couldn't express the amount of agony that went into every single word printed on those six pages; the hours he spent obsessing over the right verbiage or proper wording so no one misunderstood the intended messages or news. No one would ever truly know how much of himself was imprinted on those pages, how much of his soul was passed around the compound when people picked up their zine on the way to their schedules for the day.

To ask Hoseok to throw away his entire week's work was much like asking him to destroy a piece of himself.

The demigod glared back at the man, "Destroy them?"

"We can't have any trace of this story left hanging around the workplace."

"This is — this is absolutely idiotic, even for you Director Gong."

The man seated across from him stared pointedly, but Hoseok noticed just how peeved he was. His jaw was tight and it seemed his lips were getting thinner by the second.

"I contacted you for comment on this story last week, don't you remember?" Hoseok asked, folding his hands in his lap as he leaned forward, an eyebrow arched. "I contacted you several times."

"And when did I ever give you comment?"

"You didn't, which is why at the very end of my story I have, 'did not respond to phone calls for comment.'"

"My problem isn't about the lack of official administrative comment in the story Hoseok, my problem is the story should've never been published in the first place."

Everyone said Director Gong Yoo was "the cool" boss, but Hoseok knew differently. Behind the sleek suits, perfectly styled black hair and the placid exterior was a small man begging to be bigger than he truly was. It was the side Hoseok knew best.

Ever since he arrived at the compound, he was introduced to a different Director Gong. It didn't help that Hoseok was privy to messages Director Gong sent to the outside world, but he found it to be an advantage in many ways. It helped him get his promotion that first month and it even twisted his arm into approving his idea for The Compound Zine.

Shaking his head, Hoseok refused to budge. "You see, I don't agree."

Director Gong sighed deeply, "Of course you don't."

“Before I berate you for thinking this way, tell me why I shouldn't have published it."

"You never had my approval."

"And when has that ever stopped me?" Hoseok asked brashly. "Honestly. When Aphrodite got into that huge scandal involving like four of her kids from the compound, I printed the story and you didn't say anything."

The director seemed to hold his silence, allowing Hoseok to get to his point. He would get there eventually right?

"When Zeus publicly sent the message about not ever wanting contact with his kids, I published it and you said nothing. I even reported on who was taking massive shits in paper bags around the Athena barracks before lighting the bags on fire—yet you didn't give me permission to do that either."

"My silence isn't permission."

Hoseok rolled his eyes, his annoyance reaching an all-time high. "You do realize this story is a big deal. Sure, most of the compound didn't know about it before, but the rumors were still there. People need to know what's happening and they deserved to hear it from you, but you robbed me of the opportunity to help you do that."

"Don't be so dramatic Hoseok."

"Someone has to."

"You don't honestly think the Hades block disappearances mean those two are in danger."

"And you don't think it's suspicious?"

"Let me inform you of something: they’re descendants of Hades. If you had any real experience with the Hades kids, you'd know," Director Gong replied, standing up and turning his back to Hoseok. His dark eyes gazed out the window before continuing. "They're complete isolationists, to the bone. We go through Hades block recruits so fast here. And I'll give you two tries to guess how we go through them so fast."

"Regardless, it's your job to be sure isn't it?"

"Every Hades block recruit that 'goes missing' typically left voluntarily, without telling anyone, because they don't believe they owe anyone explanations for what they choose."

Hoseok had limited interaction with Hades block. He wasn't sure what most of the recruits did in that particular section of the compound, but he heard what others said about them. Zeus recruits had a bone to pick with them in every way. Demeter's barracks had a rough relationship with the Hades block. But, in Hoseok's unbiased opinion, most of it seemed to be a carry-over from their deity parents' emotions and feelings toward Hades himself.

Standing as well, Hoseok shrugged despite the other man not seeing it. "That all sounds like excuses for not doing your job. You might want to stop speaking so candidly—you might find parts of this conversation in the next edition."

Director Gong looked back at him, his expression neutral. "I would be careful with your threats as well. How would Hermes feel if he heard his son was giving into baseless whispers about a couple of Hades recruits running off because they'd rather be alone than be here, working toward a common goal with others?"

Hoseok took a moment, Director Gong finally hit the right button, the one that would inevitably nestle under his skin and hit a nerve. It took everything in Hoseok’s power not to slam his fist into the desk or tell this man where to stick the self-righteousness.

Taking a deep breath, the younger man gave a fake smile, "How would I know? It's not like I've ever met him. Besides, does this line get you anywhere with people like us?"

How could it? Most of the recruits here never met their deity parents. Some respected them and cared about what they thought while most just didn't care. And that was the honest truth. It wasn’t just some sappy line in a story for Hoseok. Not knowing your parents was just part of being a demigod, in his opinion.

"I'm not destroying any copy of this week's edition. Jin would kill me since his weird mug is on the front page."

"You're far more stubborn than your siblings."

"What can you do?" Hoseok replied, his face painted with a wry expression.

"Print a correction then."

"And what about my story wasn't factual?"

"You said they were kidnapped!" Director Gong shouted, jabbing his finger into the zine on the table.  

"I didn't say that, I quoted a girl who was friends with one of the Hades recruits."

"At best, this creates a false sense of danger here at the compound."

Hoseok shrugged and sighed.  

"Don't be so full of it Hoseok, remember your place. You're a mail sorter, not an investigative journalist," Director Gong stated. "They aren't missing. They ran away and that's final."

"And do you have proof to show me that's true?"

Director Gong's silence only rang in Hoseok's favor.  

"Didn't think so," he stated, winking as he stood up and headed for the door. Before he walked out of the office, he gave the director one final look. "The zine will continue normal circulation this week. If you want to comment on it at any point, you know how to contact me."

Without sparing him a second to respond, Hoseok walked briskly down the hall and out of the administrative building, trying everything in his power not to laugh maniacally. What kind of day was this? He knew when Y/N approached him with news about a missing recruit, this was possibly the biggest news tip he ever received. It was his duty to pursue it right? She begged him to help tell this story and as a dutiful son of Hermes, who was he to deny her. This was a story few heard about and, at this point, it was his job to share it.

That's what most didn't understand about this zine. This wasn't just a receptacle for every piece of gossip regurgitated around the compound. This was a place for people to send messages to a larger audience. A somewhat modern form of what his father did—just better.

He stopped short of the mail room, where he worked full time. It was the shittiest job with barely any respect earned around the compound. But the work he did with the zine? That was his pride and joy. That alone earned him the respect he had here.  

And that's when his eye caught it. The stack of zines sitting in its stand just in front of the Zeus barracks. The smile was impossible to fend off as he felt his heart swell and burst with overwhelming pride. Nothing quite compared to feeling of accomplishment he had each Wednesday when the zine was delivered to every stand around the compound.

In all his pride and the lightness he felt in his feet for standing up for this tiny little project of his, he didn’t even mind when he saw Jin walking around the corner, carrying a copy of the zine. In his other hand he had cherry tomatoes and seemed to be headed back to the communal garden. Hoseok didn’t even mentally scold him when he watched the taller demigod pass, shoving a handful of cherry tomatoes into his mouth before catching someone’s attention.

“Did you know I’m on the front page this week?”

[volubrjotr]

BILLINGS MT — A controversial bill that would likely keep genetically modified ingredients from being listed on food packaging has [allegedly] divided Montana’s U.S. senators.

Democratic Sen. Jon Tester, the Senate’s only farmer, blasted his peers Wednesday for crafting a federal bill that makes it difficult for consumers to know what they’re eating. He also called the bill a threat to independent farms.

Plants with DNA altered by genes from other plants or animals are genetically modified organisms, or GMOs. The biotechnology is most commonly used to create resistance to herbicides or disease.

Tell Daines to support labels for GMO food

Monsanto Contributions to Steve Daines, 2014 cycle

China Refuses 60,000 Tons Of U.S. Monsanto GMO Poisoned Corn

GMO ~ The Day After: The Svalbard Global Seed Vault Norway

Quaker Oats sued over glyphosate found in its ‘all natural’ oats

Tester’s positon was opposite that of Montana [corporate] farmers and [corporate] researchers who see merit in GMO sugar beets and corn modified to survive exposure to weed killers like the Monsanto herbicide Roundup and 2, 4-D Amine. Those [corporate] farmers rallied around Republican Sen. Steve Daines.

[The purpose of Monsanto herbicide GMOs is for corporations to turn a buck. The GMO herbicidal bioteched plant was created to preclude the use of exterior herbicides in the first place ~ to suggest it was created to ‘survive’ exterior herbicide is illogical. Either way ~ Monsanto poison is all over our NATURAL Food Chain ~ inside and out!]

Bill Gates Refuses To Answer Question On Why He Owns 500,000 Shares Of Monsanto

China Cuts Out Bill; Gate’s Microsoft & Google

China Refuses 60,000 Tons Of U.S. Monsanto GMO Poisoned Corn

Maurice Strong & Bill Gates: Expatriating Money Out Of America!

Monsanto GMO Claims For Children’s School Books Are Laughable: Bill Gates Applauds!

Rothschild Banking Cabal Met To Discuss Depopulation To Preserve Hoarded Wealth!

Rothschild Czar Bill Gates To Face Trial In India: Millions Of Children Poisoned By Vaccine!

Number One Killer Of Mankind Can Be Traced To Rothschild’s NWO Democide: Death By Banker’s Usurped Government!

Big Pharma Prescription Drugs: 16,400% More Deadly Than CIA/MI6/Mossad Orchestrated ISIS Terrorist Attacks!

Bill Gates Henry Kissinger Depopulation Africa: Paralyzing Vaccine Deaths 47,500 With 50 More Children Recently Paralyzed With Bill Gates Meningitis Vaccine!

The bill makes it optional for food wrappers to list genetically modified ingredients, but does require that a toll-free telephone number or scan code be published so shoppers can track down the ingredients with their smartphones.

[CORPORATIONS WANT IMMUNITY FROM HEALTH LAWSUITS CAUSED BY LACING NATURAL FOOD WITH GMOs]

SANCTION ANY PRODUCT THAT DOES NOT DISCLOSE ‘NON GMO’

IF THEY WANT TO SELL ~

LET ‘THEM’ TELL

AT THE MARKET

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Tester said it was absurd to think that a shopper with children in tow would have time to scan food wrappers with a smartphone in order to be redirected to a website where GMO ingredients could be found.

And if the grocery store had poor cellphone reception, no information would be obtained, he said.

2016 What You Need To Know About the New GMO Labeling Law

~ In Total ~ 38 Countries Have Now Banned GMOs ~ Agricultural Bio Dangerous Technology

2016 When Congress Screws Us Over On GMO Labeling : The Action Plan To Fight Back!

“Hiding basic information behind bar codes and 800 numbers is totally unacceptable. The United States Senate should not be in the business of hiding information from consumers,” Tester said.

6 CORPORATIONS FOUND ‘HIDING’ BIO DANGEROUS GMO INGREDIENTS: NESTLE & PEPSI FOUND GUILTY OF ‘ABUSIVE CORPORATE PRACTICES AGAINST CONSUMERS’ ‘ABUSIVE CORPORATE PRACTICES AGAINST CONSUMERS’

“When I grew up, I was told that consumers were always right. We should be empowering those consumers, those American consumers, with more information about the food they purchase, not with less.

Don’t take it from me, 9 out of 10 consumers say they want labeling required for GMO food. What’s the problem with that? It’s already done in 64 countries.”

The problem, say the bill’s supporters, is that there’s no proof that genetically modified crops are any different than those that aren’t modified.

Sugar from beets modified to withstand sprayings of Roundup herbicide contain nothing that would identify the beet’s GMO traits.

OBAMA’S IDIOCRACY

Soybean oil and corn syrup also have been proven safe to eat. Without a legitimate GMO health concern to warn consumers about, proponents say identifying the ingredients unfairly scares shoppers away from GMOs.

800 SCIENTISTS DEMAND THE END TO GLOBAL GMO BIOTECH EXPERIMENT

HUNGARY DESTROYS ALL DEADLY MONSANTO GMO CORN FIELDS: GMO INFECTION BY MONSANTO CAUSES ORGAN FAILURE.

There are at least five different genetically modified crops raised on Montana farms; sugar beets, corn, canola, alfalfa and soybeans. The sugar beet industry contributes about $70 million a year to the Montana economy with 45,000 farm acres and sugar factories in Billings and Sidney.

GMO foods must be properly labeled

Genetically Modified Soy Linked to Sterility

GMO MONSANTO ON THEIR KNEES: 5 REASONS MONSANTO IS CRASHING AND BURNING

States like Vermont, Washington and California have considered their own GMO labeling laws in the absence of federal policy. Vermont has a labeling law that starts in 2017. A major reason for the federal law now being debated is that it would prevent individual states from acting independently.

States Can Easily Nullify Federal Over Reach

The Senate labeling bill is considered a compromise between consumer groups worried about GMOs and [GMO] agribusiness friendly [corporate] lawmakers who oppose all [Monsanto] GMO labeling

Genetic Roulette -The Movie

[The Real Battle is that GMO’s are poisonous and should NOT be allowed into our agricultural soil which further contaminates NATURAL Seeds, Kills Bees, & Other Wildlife.]

Montana Congressperson Steve Daines ~ Bozeman, Montana ~ China Refuses 60,000 Tons Of U.S. Monsanto GMO Poisoned Corn Putting Montana Farmers Out Of Work.

“There’s no reason that Vermont and Bernie Sanders should dictate our way of life in Montana,” Daines said.

“In fact this compromise that I voted for today will protect Montana jobs, prevent baseless discrimination against Montana agricultural goods and it’s going to avoid higher prices in the grocery line.”

Daines Speech On The Senate Floor ~ Daines Argues Against The Public Being Informed About Bio-Dangerous GMOs Being contained or not contained in their Food while at the market place where products are sold for CURRENCY.

ITS LIKE PRINTING YOUR OWN MONEY BY GROWING YOUR OWN FOOD!

[In My Book Steve Daines Is Bio-Dangerous]

Vermont’s Law is all about “Information Transparency”

Corporatist Congressperson Steve Daines Says; “Vermont law is an attack on the heart of Montana’s way of life”

One Must Conclude That “Information Transparency” is an attack against Montana

Since Vermont Wants Their Citizens To Be Informed If Monsanto’s Bioteched GMOs Are Laced Into A Particular Food

Montanans Therefore Must Conclude, Steve Daines Wants Montanans To Be Uninformed About A Food Product Containing Bioteched Oranisms

Wednesday’s vote limited discussion of the bill to 30 hours, setting up a vote as early as late Thursday.

Will Montana’s Corporate Stooge Steve Daines Also Push Brawndo To Water The Plants?

The American Sugar Beet Growers Association told The Gazette last week that their group and others dependent on [BIO-DANGEROUS GMOS] biotechnology demanded compromise bill.

The alternative was dealing with a patchwork of individual state labeling laws, which would have been costly. [THEY THEN SHOULD NOT BE IN THE BUSINESS OF ALTERING NATURAL FOODS]

Montana organic producers told The Gazette they were ambivalent about the compromise proposal’s effect on their businesses, mostly because certified organic labeling is an established marketing tool.

They weren’t certain consumers would be helped by the Senate’s plan.

Tester said there was plenty for organic farmers to be concerned about, including bill language that would allow GMO corn and GMO soybeans to be considered organic if they were grown under the right conditions.

The easy answer Tester said, was to list GMO ingredients on food wrappers and let consumers decide whether the food was worth buying.

Even Jon Tester Is Bio-Dangerous When It Comes to safety

OBAMA HAS A FOOD TASTER: FOR REAL

PEPSIS PAYS $9 MILLION IN LAWSUIT FOR CALLING GMOS NATURAL

“I’m not asking for a skull and crossbones on the package. This isn’t about safety, or health of these products.

The Real Story Behind the ‘Monsanto Protection Act’

Take Action: Repeal the Monsanto Protection Act Signed By Obama!

MONSANTO ORDERED TO PAY $93 MILLION FOR POISONING RESIDENTS!

It’s about transparency, it’s about the public’s right to know, it’s about putting families before corporations, it’s about valuing consumers’ right to know over lobbyists and their slick suits and their influence here.

They’re denying consumers an easy-to-read national GM standard. Why? They’re denying people the information they need to know to make the best decision for their family. It makes no sense to me.”

Independent Record

MONSANTO’S ‘ZOMBIE WHEAT’ FALLING APART: AMERICAN FARMERS ‘STAND THEIR GROUND’

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Business Ronan Farrow breaks silence on NBC-Weinstein controversy

Business Ronan Farrow breaks silence on NBC-Weinstein controversy Business Ronan Farrow breaks silence on NBC-Weinstein controversy http://www.nature-business.com/business-ronan-farrow-breaks-silence-on-nbc-weinstein-controversy/

Business

Ronan Farrow, the journalist who won a Pulitzer Prize for his reporting on Harvey Weinstein, released an extraordinary statement Monday night that accused NBC News of having blocked his reporting on Weinstein and misled the public about doing so. “I’ve avoided commenting on the specifics of NBC’s role in the Weinstein story to keep the focus on the women and their allegations,” Farrow said in a statement posted on Twitter. “But executives there have now produced a memo that contains numerous false or misleading statements.” The statement came after Andy Lack, the chairman of NBC News, emailed employees earlier in the evening to dispute allegations that the news network hindered or tried to kill Farrow’s reporting on Weinstein, the Hollywood mogul who has been accused by multiple women of sexual assault. In his statement, Farrow contested some of the core claims Lack had made to NBC News employees. Most notably, perhaps, Farrow said his story on Weinstein was “twice cleared and deemed ‘reportable’ by legal and standards only to be blocked by executives who refused to allow us to seek comment from Harvey Weinstein.” “I loved my time at NBC,” Farrow said. “It’s a placed [sic] filled with talented, dedicated journalists, many of whom have reached out to me in frustration. They are owed an honest accounting of what happened. There’ll be more to say at the right time.” Farrow is likely alluding to details he will provide about his time reporting on Weinstein at NBC News in his new book “Catch & Kill.” In addition to Farrow’s book, the Daily Beast is working on a large story pertaining to NBC News, a person familiar with the matter told CNN. In his Monday memo, Lack responded to reports published last week in The New York Times and the Daily Beast. The Times’ article included on-the-record comments from Farrow’s former producer, who said that there were orders from “the highest levels of NBC” not to run Farrow’s story. The Beast’s article included reporting on the “back-biting” inside the network. “This is an unusual situation for a news network,” Lack acknowledged at the start of his note to employees, a copy of which was provided to CNN. “In the last several days, questions surrounding how NBC News handled Ronan Farrow’s investigation of Harvey Weinstein have resurfaced.” Andy Lack Aiming to push back against what he characterized as “unfounded intimations and accusations,” Lack provided employees a 10-page document that detailed the network’s position on why it declined to run Farrow’s reporting. The document also included what it said was an exhaustive list of interactions Weinstein had with Lack and NBC News President Noah Oppenheim. The document characterized Farrow’s reporting as not-yet ready to be broadcast. Specifically, it said that at the time Farrow turned in a script for vetting by NBC editors, he did not have a witness or any of Weinstein’s alleged victims willing to make their allegations on the record. “So we had nothing yet fit to broadcast,” Lack wrote employees. Lack said Farrow “did not agree” with the standards NBC News required for dissemination of his reporting, and asked to take his reporting elsewhere. Lack told employees that NBC News agreed to Farrow’s request. “Had we refused his request, NBC might have ultimately broken the story, but we wondered then, and still wonder now, whether the brave women who spoke to him in print would have also sat before TV cameras and lights,” Lack wrote. “If we had tried to hold him and nothing changed, we would have needlessly blocked him from disseminating it via another forum. And that is why we agreed to let him go elsewhere.” Lack wrote in his memo that the story Farrow ultimately published in The New Yorker bore little resemblance to the script he had turned in to his editors at NBC News as it included multiple women making their allegations on the record. “Not one of these seven women was included in the reporting Farrow presented while at NBC News,” Lack wrote. Farrow, however, said in his statement that NBC News’ “list of sources is incomplete and omits women who were either identified in the NBC story or offered to be.” Emily Nestor, a Weinstein victim who spoke to Farrow on the record for his New Yorker story, appeared to support Farrow’s claim in a statement that she released Monday night. Nester said that she had “tentatively offered” to “attach my name to the interview in silhouette or potentially even reshoot the interview with my face visible” while Farrow was reporting on Weinstein at NBC News. But she added, NBC News was “not interested in this interview.” Nester added that Ambra Gutierrez, the model who Weinstein admitted groping on audio captured as part of a New York Police Department sting, “had always been willing to allow Farrow to identify her by name and use the recording of her.” In his statement, Farrow also disputed NBC News’ assertion that he requested to take his reporting on Weinstein to another publication. “The suggestion to take the story to another outlet was first raised by NBC, not me, and I took them up on it only after it became clear that I was being blocked from further reporting,” Farrow said. Weinstein, who is facing criminal charges in New York, has denied all allegations of “non-consensual sexual activity.” In the memo provided to employees by Lack, NBC News also aimed to dispel what Lack characterized as a “baseless speculation that some interference by Harvey Weinstein played a role in our decision making.” To do so, Lack said the document included “every interaction NBC News executives and editors had with Weinstein and his attorneys.” The document said Weinstein “made numerous calls” and sent emails to Lack on the matter. It said that when Weinstein first called Lack in April 2017, Lack was “unaware of the investigation as it had not yet been raised to his level.” During that phone call, the document said Lack suggested Weinstein contact MSNBC because “he didn’t know what Weinstein was talking about.” The document said Weinstein made “at least nine more calls and sent four emails to Lack” following that exchange, but that “none were answered or returned.” The document also detailed contact Weinstein had with Oppenheim. It said that the two sat together at the Time 100 Gala in April 2017 and had only a brief exchange. In early August, the document said, Weinstein called Oppenheim who answered because he didn’t realize it was Weinstein calling. When he answered, Weinstein “launched into a rambling assault on Rose McGowan’s credibility” to which Oppenheim said if NBC News had a report ready for air it would give Weinstein “the opportunity to comment.” The document said the third interaction came when Weinstein attorney Lanny Davis arrived at the Rockefeller Center “uninvited and without an appointment.” “Roughly two weeks after this brief interaction, Weinstein’s attorney Charles Harder sent an email to NBC News’ lawyer grossly mischaracterizing the assurances in this conversation,” the document said. “For instance, in their version ‘no investigation ready for air’ became ‘the investigation has ended.’” The fourth interaction Oppenheim had with Weinstein came when Weinstein emailed to congratulate him on the launch of Megyn Kelly’s new show, the document said. Lack wrote in his memo to employees, “None of this was kept secret from Farrow. None of it was any different from the calls we receive on every other difficult story our investigative unit regularly breaks. And none of it played any role in our decision-making.” Lack concluded his note, writing, “As we get back to work this week, we will continue to pursue the toughest stories, in the most challenging circumstances, involving the most powerful people. And we will keep doing it while upholding the journalistic standards that have been the backbone of this outstanding news organization.” In a statement Monday evening, Rich McHugh — the ex-NBC News producer who previously worked with Farrow — called for an independent investigation. He said he was never interviewed for the report “and only learned about it when asked for comment by reporters late last week.” NBC recently published a memo and “fact sheet” from Andy Lack regarding their handling of the Harvey Weinstein sexual assault story that was never aired. Here is my response: pic.twitter.com/H9RbsW78jB— Rich McHugh (@RichMcHughNBC) September 4, 2018 “Others have called for an independent investigation of NBC news and activities regarding the issue of sexual harassment,” McHugh said. “That seems more important now than ever given today’s letter from Mr. Lack. The release of an internally drafted report without a complete investigation and transparency for its for its participants only raises more questions than answers.” CNNMoney (New York) First published September 3, 2018: 9:25 PM ET Read More | https://money.cnn.com/2018/09/03/media/andy-lack-nbc-news-ronan-farrow-harvey-weinsten/index.html | Oliver Darcy

Business Ronan Farrow breaks silence on NBC-Weinstein controversy, in 2018-09-04 07:52:53

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Rebecca Solnit: They Think They Can Bully the Truth

Cousin to the noun dictator is the verb dictate. There are among us people who assume their authority is so great they can dictate what happened, that their assertions will override witnesses, videotapes, evidence, the historical record, that theirs is the only voice that matters, and it matters so much it can stand tall atop the conquered facts. Lies are aggressions. They are attempts to dictate, to trample down the facts and those who hold them, and they lay the groundwork for the dictatorships, the little ones in families, the big ones in nations.

Black Lives Matter has shown us policemen who continued to insist on their version of events when there is videotaped evidence to the contrary, or when physical evidence and eyewitnesses contradicts their account of events. You realize that they had assumed they could dictate reality, because for decades they actually had, and they were having a hard time adjusting to reality dictating back. As one of the Marx Brothers quipped long ago, “Who you gonna believe, me or your own eyes?” The police assumed it was neither our eyes nor the evidence.

In February of 2015, two San Francisco policemen shot a 20-year-old Guatemalan immigrant, Amilcar Perez-Lopez, to death. All the bullets entered him from behind—four went into his torso through his back—but they claim they shot in self-defense because he was rushing them. They did not face consequences, for lying, or for taking the life of a young man trying to get by in a strange land. Two months later, in North Charleston, South Carolina, Walter Scott was shot by a policeman while he too fled. He too died of bullets to the back, but his killer claimed self-defense in an account that differed dramatically from the videotape (which appears to show him planting a weapon on the victim after he had fallen) and eyewitness accounts. Scott’s killer got a 20-year sentence.

That victims will remain voiceless was the presumption behind much of the sexual abuse that’s been uncovered in the #MeToo era. Getting away with it is the same thing as assuming that no one will know, because your victim will be intimidated or shamed into silence, or that if he or she speaks up they can be discredited or menaced back into silence, or that even if they don’t shut up no one will believe them because your credibility crushes theirs. That yours is the only version that counts, even if you have to use savage means to make it so. Jane Mayer and Ronan Farrow reported of former New York attorney general Eric Schneiderman’s four victims, “All have been reluctant to speak out, fearing reprisal.” But it was he who faced reprisal in the end, because the rules changed, because a critical mass of women broke the silence and the system that perpetuated that silence, because the media that largely ignored or trivialized these stories began to take them seriously.

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Most of us think of truth as something that arises from facts that exist independently of our wills and whims; we have no choice in the matter, but we also believe in some sort of objective reality—either a thing did or did not happen, a sentence was or was not said, a substance is or is not poison. (And yes, I read lots of postmodern theory once upon a time and know all the counterarguments, but you know what I’m talking about.) What’s clear now is that most is not all, that a minority of us think that they can enforce a version that is divorced from factuality, and they always have. It corrupts everything round them and the corruption begins within them. Somewhere inside they know that they are liars and that they are imposing compliance to lies.

There are lies subordinates tell to avoid culpability, but they tend to be about specific things—I did not eat the cake, I did not show up late—while these fact-bullies can take charge of whole categories, as when a menacing father insists that his whole family pretend that everything is fine and they adore him. Gaslighting is a collective cultural phenomenon too, and it makes cultures feel crazy the way it does individual victims. That we are supposed to pretend that mass shootings and the epidemic gun death rate have nothing to do with the availability of guns is insane. That there is nothing to the Trump team’s dozens of covert contacts with Russian regime figures during the campaign and the Mueller investigation is a baseless witch hunt is a counterfactual agenda being pushed by sheer aggression from the Republicans and right-wing media and some supposedly left-wing darlings.

“The country is now in a sort of civil war, and part of what is at stake is truth and facts in the form of history, scientific fact, political accountability, and adherence to the law.”

This summer we are once again witnessing the indignation that arises in powerful men when it turns out other people have things to say and that they might be listened to and believed. Congressman Jim Jordan is outraged that nine former wrestlers report that when he was the assistant wrestling coach at Ohio State, he knew but did nothing about their sexual abuse by the team doctor. It’s not a wrestling match he’s likely to win, but he seems to be unable to conceive that he’s not the boss of this story. (He tweeted on July 11 that CNN is contacting former staff and interns and “getting desperate,” as though this thing called reporting was both outlandishly unfamiliar and transgressive—“How can you ever trust such #fakenews?” he concluded.) Defenders of Darla Shine, racist conspiracy-theory-pushing wife of former Fox honcho Bill Shine (now the new White House communications director), claim that she is being smeared by having her own words recirculated. How dare you repeat things that I said! How dare you not let me rewrite what did and did not transpire!

It’s kind of like the Bill Cosby case—in which a surprising number of people seemed to be willing to believe that ten or twenty or thirty or eventually more than fifty women, most of whom were strangers to each other, were lying rather than that their idol was. It seemed to be less about the facts in the case than their conviction that he should be able to outweigh them, the way the person with the mic can shout down the crowd. Feminism, like many other human-rights movements, has been a process of amplifying voices until they can hold their own and of solidarity so that small voices can be cumulatively loud enough to counter the dictators. Thus have so many recent cases—from Fox News CEO Roger Ailes to Harvey Weinstein—been built by many other women coming forward to support the testimony of the woman or women who broke the ice.

In 2014, singer Kesha sued to be released from her recording contract on the grounds that her producer, Dr. Luke, aka Luke Gottwald, had raped and otherwise abused her and that she had almost no creative control over her own music (a year earlier, her fans started a Free Kesha petition). Gottwald and the corporation refused to release her from the contracts she signed in her mid-teens, so there was a trial that brought more attention to the situation—when she lost, she remained stuck with him, hostage to a man she seems to dread and loathe. Now, four years later, he’s suing because “Gottwald’s music career will never recover from the damage she has caused.” By speaking up when his assumption seems to be that a superstar singer with a series of #1 hits would remain voiceless. But also, if you assume that Kesha is telling the truth (and I find her credible), Dr. Luke and his backers are blaming her for what he did, or rather for not keeping it secret. They assume he had a right to impunity, which is a right to do what you like and dictate the reality around it, a right to confront no competing versions, even from the other parties involved.

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Meanwhile, the radio host who groped Taylor Swift at a meet-and-greet and then sued her for saying so and getting him fired (he lost) complains he’s afraid to talk to women (perhaps because talking to a woman and grabbing a woman’s ass are apparently so hard for him to tell apart, a kind of confusion we’re hearing about from many men who are now “afraid to talk to” women). He says says he wants to tell her, “How can you live with yourself? You ruined my life.” That seems to be his way of saying that he was shocked to find that one of the most powerful figures in pop music had a voice and people believed her when she used it. During the trial that may be her greatest performance to date, Swift noted that contrary to accusations and long-established conventions, she had no responsibility to protect her assailant: “I’m not going to let you or your client make me feel in any way that this is my fault. Here we are years later, and I’m being blamed for the unfortunate events of his life that are the product of his decisions—not mine.” She was going after the assumption that no matter what he did, she has to keep life pleasant for him, by keeping her mouth shut.

“The [media] are among the most dishonest human beings on earth. Right? And they sort of made it sound like I have this feud with the intelligence community.” –Donald Trump

Politifact published a timeline of White House positions on Trump’s alleged one-off sexual encounter with Stormy Daniels, a rollercoaster of denials and admissions of things that were denied, and other contradictions. What’s noteworthy was that she signed, just before the election, a standard nondisclosure agreement: a contract to pay a woman to be silent so that a man’s version of reality might prevail. These things often happen when unequal status or menace alone don’t enforce the desired silence; Daniels also reports being threatened by a man who approached her and her child in a parking lot: “That’s a beautiful little girl. It’d be a shame if something happened to her mom.’”

Lies require enforcement. Harvey Weinstein used nondisclosure agreements and armies of lawyers, spies from Mossad, threats to people’s careers and reputations, and the aid of a lot of others at the Weinstein Company and beyond to keep his high-profile victims silent, but he also had help from a society that traditionally silenced and discredited women. Long ago I wrote in my essay “Men Explain Things to Me” that credibility is a basic survival skill; the police have assumed that they have more than the people they target; men have assumed they have more than women. Despite everything going on in electoral politics, we are in era of leveling out who has this precious asset—or perhaps what’s going on in Washington is the backlash. Credibility is not inherent; it’s present in our own priorities and assumptions about who to believe. And those who are silenced beforehand don’t even get a chance at credibility.

More and more I come to see the compulsive, frenetic pace of lies by the president as a manic version of that prerogative of dictating reality. It’s a way of saying, I determine what’s real and you suck it up even if you know it’s bullshit. He has abandoned credibility for dictatorial power. When you’re a star, they let you do it, and the size of your stardom can be measured in how much you can force people to accept—or pretend to accept—contrary to their own intelligence and orientation and ethics. This is, after all, the liar who at CIA headquarters on January 21, 2017, told hundreds of CIA employees—skeptics whose profession is the collection and verification of facts—easily disproved lies about the size of his inauguration and the state of the weather the day before.

He told them, “And the reason you’re my first stop is that as you know I have a running war with the media. They are among the most dishonest human beings on earth. Right? And they sort of made it sound like I have this feud with the intelligence community.” Which he did, since he’d compared them to Nazi Germany a few weeks before, but he tends to praise to their faces those he attacks behind their backs, as he’s just done with British Prime Minister Theresa May (and then denied the earlier statements; the Washington Post’s headline read “Trump denies he said something that he said on a tape that everyone has heard.”). One imagines that he has since childhood never been held accountable; it seems more than possible that after a lifetime of this he’s convinced that he actually dictates reality, or rather that it doesn’t exist, or only exists at his whim, that he is as freefloating in a void of unaccountability as the blimp in his image was in the air over London. That is, that he’s a nihilist.

His lying is sometimes regarded as a distraction or an annoyance, but it is a dangerous thing in itself, and he is himself a product of a system of producing and enforcing lies. This week we saw him lying, again, about the Russian role in making him president and corrupting our election; he surrendered to Putin in public with the latter as the victor in a cyberwar both men insist we pretend did not happen, a war they had perhaps just discussed in secret. Trump also insists that we take Putin’s word over that of US intelligence, the world’s news agencies, the Mueller investigation, and a lot of senators and congresspeople. The thing to remember here about an assault on truth is that it’s an assault.

His followers have had their minds weaponized by decades of Fox News and right-wing pundits promoting conspiracies and denying crucial phenomena, including the valuable role immigrants play in our economy and the urgent reality of human-caused climate change. The country is now in a sort of civil war, and part of what is at stake is truth and facts in the form of history, scientific fact, political accountability, and adherence to the law. In “The Prevention of Literature” George Orwell wrote that, “A totalitarian state is in effect a theocracy, and its ruling caste, in order to keep its position, has to be thought of as infallible. But since, in practice, no one is infallible, it is frequently necessary to rearrange past events in order to show that this or that mistake was not made, or that this or that imaginary triumph actually happened… Totalitarianism demands, in fact, the continuous alteration of the past, and in the long run probably demands a disbelief in the very existence of objective truth.”

The internet has produced its own form of informational relativism. Facebook is now taking heat for its refusal, amid what is supposed to be an informational clean-up, to ban InfoWars—which, among the other conspiracy theories it’s pushed, claimed the Sandy Hook massacre of children was a hoax and the teenage Parkland mass shooting survivors were “crisis actors.” Asked about the continued presence of InfoWars, Facebook News Feed head John Hegeman said, “I think part of the fundamental thing here is that we created Facebook to be a place where different people can have a voice. And different publishers have very different points of view.” That some of them are libelous and destructively false doesn’t seem to faze him (Sandy Hook parents, six of whom are suing InfoWars, have received threats from people who InfoWars directed to believe that the massacre was “a hoax to take away your guns”). This is a consequence of internet companies pretending they’re neutral platforms rather than information organizations with the responsibilities that have always come with that role. This is the result of their desire to serve any product to any customer, as long as it’s profitable.

Meanwhile Safiya Umoja Noble’s new book Algorithms of Oppression: How Search Engines Reinforce Racism proposes that one driving force behind Charleston church mass murderer Dylann Roof’s racism was Google. Pacific Standard’s James McWilliams reports in a piece on Noble’s book that Roof did a search on “black on white crime” and was directed to a website by the Council of Conservative Citizens, a white supremacist website promulgating lies. Google owns YouTube, which the Wall Street Journal reported last winter offers recommendations to viewers that “often present divisive, misleading or false content.” Tech critic Zeynep Tufekci noted, their “algorithm seems to have concluded that people are drawn to content that is more extreme than what they started with—or to incendiary content in general,” and it gives them what they want or think they want, whether or not it’s good for them or us or the record. The most powerful corporations on earth have, in other words, concluded that lies are profitable and pursued that profit.

As Hannah Arendt famously said, “The ideal subject of totalitarian rule is not the convinced Nazi or the convinced Communist, but people for whom the distinction between fact and fiction (i.e., the reality of experience) and the distinction between true and false (i.e., the standards of thought) no longer exist.” Making those distinctions, doing the work to be clear, is resistance. It consists in part of supporting and reading good news outlets (including the newspapers whose financial basis has been undermined by the internet), and being informed both about the news they report and the historical background to the current crises to be found in books (and in universities, which makes it worth noting that the value of a humanities education is also under attack; one of its values is making people thoughtful sifters of data who are well-grounded in history). It consists of maintaining your capacity to fact-check and sift and evaluate information and your independence of mind. Solidity and steadfastness are key to resistance, and clarity, about who you are and what you believe. Principles are contagious, and though we need direct and dramatic action, the catalytic power of myriad people standing on principle and living by facts matters too. It means holding yourself and those around you to high standards not only of truth but of accuracy.

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