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fictionfixations · 28 days ago

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playing this game for the first time

IM GOING TO THROW IT CRASHED ON ME WHILE I WAS MAKING A PROFILE i KNEW I SHOULDVE SAVED 😭(I STARED AT THE SAVE BUTTON LIKE 'should i save just in case? nahh i dont need to save until im done' and then it kicked me out)

i dont think of myself as a person good at designing stuff

but i was really liking what i made it looked so pretty hjfiouweshjdWQIUAsk

it doesnt even mean that much to me im just gonna feel really depressed for awhile cause like wtf man 😭

this is the farthest i got last time i kind of hate it. the quality of stuff i do always degrades the more i repeat it so hhhhhhhhhhh it feels really nitpicky but something about the images behind the classroom just dont look right

it keeps saying connection error when trying to save

im pointing a fan directly at it cause my phone is a fucking heater hoping it fixes 😭

im gonna close and reopen the game this sucks (not the game im just getting tired of all the live2d games i play being laggy as fuck or having connection issues, its not just this game that hates me 💀) idk if the twitter button works i havent pressed it cause i tend to lag so much more the moment i click out of a game and then re-enter without closing it and re-opening

tbh i dont know anything about this. i think theres a good story (kinda depressing(???)) but i havent heard much about it

one of the first things i saw about this game tbh was the customizing a profile and i got my mind blown cause it looked so pretty i kept getting pjsk in my recommended and idk something about tatsu...???? forgor rest of name. blonde guy. where apparently in the movie he switched to a pirate outfit???? im. so confused

i feel like im being sabotaged cause im trying to play a song and then it lags and i miss and im dfaiuhdwushdajw

WHY do you do this to me 😭

i need a fan because when it overheats its literally unplayable (its not even that its hot its that it starts lagging like hell) so im just having cold air blasted into my eyes which is kinda distracting :'D

its fun though i like like the interface?? its really smooth its a little confusing with note placement but im. getting used to it

im sad i have to actually play with a fan because i really like rhythm games i wanna get into it but it keeps lagging

why do all the good games (that i wanna play) have to be on mobile and prone to crashing/lagging 😭

tbh im getting into it now that im used to it crashing its like. tears of themis. which also crashes often and lags me. which sucks cause i really enjoy the story. but then id be going through this important bit and almost finish it and then it crashes and then keeps crashing while im speeding through it trying to complete it 💀 (cough cough the trial bits suck because i keep having to re-present evidence and im just like do i look like i remember what the answer is LET ME THROUGH)

its kinda because of that that i cant play it in super long bursts though so im just gonna be here procrastinating from it for months because i dont feel like continuing to crash trying to do shit. play again. crash. stop playing.

sigh. sometimes i hate that i get more invested in stories in games by actually playing the game. because sometimes my devices dont want me to play and makes me lag like hell sadge

anyway my favorites rn are nightcord at 25:00(?) w/ the miku from that ver theres another like band rhythm game i play except the 3d models make me lag so much more. this game is much more manageable. ..like osmetimes it lags so much i literally lose all my life but like. at least i can play ?????

anyway uh ill try to play more. like. i play a lot of games but ive been neglecting the story so ive been trying to speed through them (while actually reading but like bingeing through as much story as i can before it stops me or i give up)

okay i think i can play songs now without lagging except teh moment i think about how its not lagging it starts lagging 💀 (another time is when i started singing along it started lagging. i just have bad timing man.)

i can.. kind of play expert songs. (except when i cant) except its.really overwhelming and i stop being able to read the map to where i just default to see note = tap so its ilke im kinda spamming in a sense??? and praying it works out also my brain sometimes stutters so i fuck up. this prob isnt like anything revolutionary but with flick notes if therse one flick note and at the same time a note thats not a flick note and i get confused i just act as if both are flick notes cause its not like you get penalized for flicking a non-flick note

the 3d music videos are cute

i only got a new outfit for.. person me no remember name of purple haired girl

i think you can set it to have characters who are actually singing the song but i like staring at the characters i have cause i put my favorites on the team + like my only 4 star rn?? also like kaito is there i think (im bad at names but hes one of the vocaloids is he not) because i wanted to go with like the dark sorta empty vibe

but so its so weird when a model is singing but its so clearly not the right voice lmfao

i feel like itd be fun to learn the choreography especially for like cosplay stuff??

id like the music videos more if i could play the songs while watching them without lagging really badly 😭

NOO PLEASEE DONT LAG DURING THE VIRTUAL SHOW 🙏

i crashed 😭

song: plays few notes immediately crashes

hhh i know the song but i cant remember the name

tfw your glowsticks feel like a windscreen wiper

also i just realized your view moves if you move your phone. thats cool but i cant do that because my battery drains stupidly fast if its not being charged all the time i am not joking

i dont really have an attachment to these characters yet so i cant understand how it might feel to someone really invested but this is cool 👍

oh it ended

i missed the first song unfortunately :(

i think theres another one happening in like. ..30 minutes? an hour?? shrug. idk if its the same one or something else

i know this post kinda makes it seem like im having a bad time but im having a fun time its just that when something bad happens i have more to say

anyway i like this a lot more than the other band rhythm game i play. like i mean i had a lot over there and there are some songs i really like that arent on here but i.. also wasnt reading the story for that game either i was literally just playing it because rhythm game thats it 😭 i only went through the story to skip through it cause it gave me like the stuff to pull for the gacha so um

im gonna try to pay attention this time 👍👍👍

also auto is a blessing i will never not praise auto in a game (except when it plays bad but tbh if it works then it doesnt matter. not a shade towards this game but towards hsr cause sometimes it ults on a single enemy with low health that could be killed with just basic atk. and then next wave and that ult wouldve been so useful 😭)

off topic but idk why but 3d music videos dont lag when its playing the song on auto. except when i take a screenshot wtf

or maybe its just that it lags when the phone starts heating up. which tracks. wish i could play this on pc. wonder how itd work if it did cause buttons you press are what??? (honestly i can only play 4 note songs on pc anything else my mind blanks) but it still wouldve been cool and deffo less laggy

#hatsune miku colorful stage #project sekai #prsk #pjsekai #thoughts #first time playing

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borom1r · 5 months ago

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THANK @theshakespearetrash FOR MORR QUESTIONS IMMMMMNNN VERY HIGH ive never RPed as John Marlott but ive written 2 fics for him tht counts right? right

(ask meme)

1. Is your muse afraid of death?

he wants to die so bad. + then he does and his family is gone AND his rest is stolen from him 💔 so no. but it’s very sad

2. What is your muse’s kill count?

huh. that’s a good question actually. I think.. huh. not many? Hervey’s henchdude in s1 and i think someone else?? im very high rn he killed the one dude in s2 to escape the asylum n there’s a lotta death that follows him but like 2? 3? ppl HE kills on screen.

ofc that’s not touchin on the war/anything pre-canon in his work. + he blames himself for the death of his wife and child so those Could be counted

3. What is your muse’s biggest fear?

everyone he loves dying. + hey guess what happens in canon!!

4. How easy is it to anger your muse?

not very. he knows the dance of Polite Society Manners and can keep his composure. he might be stern but it’s rare that he Actually gets angry. until his sanity starts slipping but u know that’s beyond his fuckin control

5. What is your muse’s biggest regret?

everything tht happened w his wife n child

6. Does your muse believe in an afterlife?

LOL yea but he doesn’t get to go thereeeeee

7. How many scars does your muse have?

HM. many. lots on his back n obvs the scars from Hervey. bet he has quite a few more tho

8. Does your muse tend to bottle things up?

yes but not.. mm, not consciously i think. he’s just so used to isolation that i don’t think he even Fathoms opening up to someone as a possibility

9. What is one thing that would break your muse?

HRM. well. Flora’s death does, one could argue. at least it starts the steep downward spiral into his rebirth and further decline following his institutionalization

10. Does your muse have nightmares? What about?

obviously yea + im fucking insane abt him. barking like a dog @ Sean Bean fucking gutting himself with fabric shears

11. Would your muse kill for someone they care about?

oh yea ofc he would. of course he would.

12. What was the worst injury your muse has received?

does it count as an injury if it happened postmortem? i think the psychological trauma caused by it means it counts. the surgical wounds from Hervey

13. How much pain can your muse withstand? For how long?

s1? a fair amount of pain for quite a long time. s2? the man’s a corpse. he got coffin shrapnel in his side and fuckin walked home. he’s fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine he’s fine don’t ask

14. What was the most traumatic moment in your muse’s life?

Hervey’s bullshit forever. hate that man hitting him w bricks unironically

15. How often does your muse cry? Do they view it as weakness?

RARELY + feel like he’s probably neutral abt it conceptually he’s just so used to being completely alone. i think emotions are kind of just a numb ache for him for a while. + then of course he bonds w Flora and Nightingale and then Everything Goes To Hell And Crashes And Burns

16. If your muse could talk to one person they’ve lost, who would it be?

HM. his wife i think. bc he at least got the closure of seein Flora + Nightingale reunited. but he never got to see his wife even Before his rebirth

17. Does your muse consider themselves a good person? Why or why not?

HRM. s1? no i think he’s neutral to himself at BEST. s2……….. nooooooooo but also yes kind of i think Esther really helps him see the good in himself. so by the end of s2 Yes but only then

18. Does your muse think they’re capable of changing? Do they even want to?

OH. very good question. does he? i think he feels like he Has to believe in change bc Esther and Flora and Nightingale did ultimately play a role in changing him for the better. and Hervey changed him for the worse. but also these r all external forces effecting him not like. himself. can he? I don’t think so. I think if he thought abt it he’d think that he himself is stagnant. it’s like pond ripples. if you lob a rock into water there’s already rocks in the bottom of that bitch so the only real change is surface distortion and a little more weight. and ultimately the ripples stop and the water settles. maybe it’s cloudier bc sediment got stirred up. maybe it’s clear, who knows. Still just a fuckin lake. does that make sense? idk man I cried in a theater today + toook too many edibles he’s himself. that’s an answer

#THANK!!!!!

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queerbeverage · 4 months ago

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So uh, little update on this. I'm now like 97% sure we're plural. Still have to read up on like proper terminology & stuff cause i don't want to accidentally be a dick to someone who's also plural.

Also i feel like we don't satisfy the "standard" plural definition? We're pretty aligned, don't really have our own separate memories (we all do suffer from memory issues & weird memory recall tho), and we aren't really sure if we're even wholly separate people. It's a bit like if you were to put a tinted lense on a camera. It's still the same camera & the same scenery you photograph, just tinted in a different color. Some colors shine more with an orange lense than with a green one, and others looks more dull/bland/invisible.

Most of our interactions happen inside, and they're mostly like a discussion. Two of us sometimes chime in with remarks or suggestions or wisdom if they feel i might need it. Sometimes (tho that has gotten really rare) someone other than me fronts. Mostly Books [yes that is her name, no they do not care about their name, they just recognise the practicality in it. They're all about logic & reasoning & remembering facts n stuff. She can be a little cold sometimes; sometimes likes to play devils advocate. She/They for her]. She likes to argue in person sometimes. Or when our hyperfocus is being discussed with someone earnestly, who won't judge us. Then she's really happy to take over & prove herself. She has a lot of fun & enjoyment in those moments. Sadly, they have gotten rare in the last months.

The others are making themselves pretty scarce right now (which is mostly a good thing, no offense). One of them has saved our lives probably a few times. She has been at the forefront for a lot of really heavy & shitty problems and she has done her best to get us through them. I really feel for her. Well, for all of us. We all experienced that shit. She was just the unlucky one who drove the car at the time of crashing, and we were 'only' passengers (metaphorically. We're a good & safe driver lol). I think it takes a harder toll on her. So when she's not needed she mostly relaxes. Sometimes shares her observations if she thinks they'll help us avoid a crisis. But we've all gotten good at that (unfortunately :/ ). She doesn't have a name right now. Also doesn't want a name rn. A placeholder would feel wrong also. Dunno. If i'd have to choose a name for her from our existing name collection it'd probably be Rosa.

The last one is so similar to myself, there's barely a distinction. We function so well in tandem we often bleed into each other (if that makes sense?). I call her Chloe/sometimes Aloy. She likes Chloe more most of the time. We both like being social. She more than i do. She likes partying, taking drugs (in moderation ofc she's not stupid), socialising, getting us to relax & take a break. I have some difficulty with all that. She helps me. But i've been getting better at spotting when to take a break. Still struggling with seeing when i need to get out & talk to people. She also sometimes helps us to talk boundaries & be more direct to people. Been struggling with masking & not advocating for myself for while now. She tries to help there too but we're all a little new to that.

So uh, yeah. None of this is really final, still pretty unsure of myself. We're still the same person, just with a different perspective on it. We all answer to the same name(s) we all use. Some just describe parts of us better than others sometimes (that changes too; we're pretty in flux right now). Sometimes i'll use we instead of I if i feel it's more fitting. Sometimes not. Sometimes i'll mean all of us with I, sometimes just me. It won't matter to anybody else in those cases tho, just to us.

So yeah. Small kinda messy update :)

The thing they don't tell you about discovering you're trans is that once you open up that whole can of worms, when you accept something so fundamental as your gender is not built on a stable foundation and can be changed, it gets you thinking about other stuff.

Who am I, really? What parts of me are fabricated, an armor to get me to survive until where i am now? How much of me is real under that? Will the house of cards that is my personality crumble when i look too hard?

Is there even an I or is there a we? Are we more than one, or just a lot of different-thinking and different-behaving facets of one another? We're a lot different at times, but we mostly work together. We wouldn't be able to cope so well and be so functional if it weren't for all of us working together, chiming in.

How much of my memories is trauma? How can i break free of that if it's all i have ever known?

Is the person i am now even real? Maybe the me from before was more Me. Maybe i just keep coming up with coping mechanisms and behaviors because i learned it that way, and i keep myself from just experiencing myself.

What else is there but change? Are there any constants, really? So much of me has been in flux lately, i don't know what pieces to hold on to and what pieces to discard.

#rayla talks #my experiences #ha or i guess our experiences #identity crisis #we're still all me and i'm all them. might not make sense to you but it does to us and that's most important.

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sixeyesgojo · 3 years ago

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I am super duper curious, and I apologise if you're not taking requests at the moment, but how would Dad!Gojo deal with an Arch nemesis daughter? Or perhaps (if more in your ballpark) a Sorcerer daughter that very much looks to be going down the road to becoming a curse user? How would he pull her out of that spiral before things passed the point of no return?

Summary: Gojo trying to handle his "problem child".

Characters: Gojo Satoru & villain!daughter

A/N: HELLO, I FORGOT THIS WAS SITTING IN MY DRAFTS AND I THOUGHT I POSTED IT I'm fine with headcanons whenever, which is why hc requests are never closed (I might take my time to respond though bc busy person). Nie's "stop mentioning the higher ups in your Gojo stuff" challenge, sigh

Let's say her villain origin story has something to do with feeling like being neglected by Gojo. Whether he does it on purpose or not - it's probably the latter because he's just so busy. It doesn't matter much whether she's well taken care of; every child wants to spend time with their parents at some point, right? But it's not easy since he's always busy or away on missions. She sees him being more affectionate towards his students (in her view anyway) and grows frustrated. It doesn't stop here, though. More and more factors come into play and one day...

Arch nemesis daughter:

say sike rn

I'm gonna be super honest and say it: it'll probably end tragically

I somehow don't doubt that the daughter would be weak, so if she's already on the enemies' side... yikes

Gojo would probably try to look the other way, as long as the trouble she causes isn't on a large scale - at this point, there is no chance of convincing her to come back anymore

He's conflicted.

On the one hand, the higher ups have told him to put her down. It's not like he gives a shit about whatever the old farts want him to do, most of the time.

This is his daughter, his irredeemable daughter who grew to hate him so much, she defected.

But this is also his daughter, his beloved daughter he watched grow whenever he was able to all these years

He'll often wonder, what he could have done better. He knows why she abandoned his side.... but given the circumstances, would anything have been different... if he had treated her even better whenever he was around?

His conscience says... logaically, it has to be him. He has to stop her. Not only is it his duty as the current top sorcerer but also his responsibility since 1) it's his fault, 2) it's his daughter.

But his heart? It's screaming out to him to not harm her in any way. The guilt in his chest is already enough to suffocate him in the darkest depths anyway. If he took her youth away too-

It's safe to say the two of them will have to meet at some point and it's going to be ugly

They fight

(but of course, Gojo holds back as he cannot bear going all out against his own daughter)

Pick your poison because I see no happy ending for this one, sorry

possible curse user daughter:

he notices changes in behavior right away

If he can help it - and he can - then he'll clear his entire schedule for her to talk it out with her, presenting his view and understanding her, then maybe spend some urgently needed quality time together

but this is not enough to convince her... until...

Let's assume she's already made contact with some curse users who are interested in recruiting her for their... team or plans.

Naturally, they are sus of her because she's the daughter of the strongest, so ofc they'd tail her to see if she's a mole or not

When they see her out with Gojo... suspicions confirmed.

They wait for an opportunity to attack... Despite being somewhat prepared to go up against Gojo Satoru, they won't risk it if they can avoid it.

And then, they launch their ambush when he's absent for a moment

Everything happens in a flash, so she doesn't even realize that she was not hit... until she processes being in the arms of her father, who's shielding her with his body

Of course he's uninjured, right? He must be, he has Infinity, right?

Wrong, something messed with his ability and to her horror, the daughter realizes that he really shielded her from a freaking nasty hit

The blood's streaming down his back and somehow his Reversed Cursed Technique won't work, yet the first thing he does is ask her, "Are you okay?" Because her safety matters the most to him.

It is that moment when it dawns on her: he really does care about her, even if he doesn't show it much.

All the soft moments he bestowed upon her resurface - all the times they spent time together, the gifts she took for granted, the times he made her laugh - everything, and the sensation of barely missing a bad hit, comes crashing down on her and she's perplexed, frozen on the spot.

Of course Dad!Gojo takes care of the enemies but when he's done, he just... sorta collapses next to her, trying to act cool when she clearly sees the blood

Somehow they make it home and she patches him up, which is also the time where they have a heart-to-heart talk and they talk things out (which was his original plan after spending time with her but then those curse users came)

Things are still rocky but they're on better terms now; both sides are trying their best to make amends

Who knows? Maybe one day they will be able to pick up the broken pieces and fix them together.

#nie answers #anon #gojo headcanons #gojo as dad #dad!gojo #papa!gojo #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x reader

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tobiosmilktea · 4 years ago

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can i request headcannons for tsukishima, kuroo, iwa, and oikawa on their best friend telling them that they like someone so the boys get all sad (or whatever reaction you see fit) but it turns out that their bff was talking about them the whole time + like a confession. thank you in advance 💞

hidden feelings with tsukishima, kuroo, iwaizumi, and oikawa

a/n: sorry for the wait! this was really fun to write, hope you all like it :)) also scenarios are going to take a little longer to publish, but i’ll make sure to get them out asap !

— t. kei

you honestly said it out of the blue

you didn’t think of it much, it was more like a little hint since surely tsukishima was smart enough to figure it out right?

wrong.

you both were in the middle of a study session break and the entire time you could barely focus when the guy you were entirely whipped for was sitting right in front of you

the workspace was small too as both of your materials could barely fit on the table, his face was barely a foot away from yours the entire time

like hOW THE HELL IS HE NOT FLUSTERED RN

it’s been like this for ages though, ever since you two had met the beginning of your first year at karasuno

you immediately fell in love with his humor with how his quite teasing charm was always your favorite type of banter

and you could tell that he had some sort of soft spot for you ever since you could fire back the same spit fire of jokes and teasing just as he did for you

you just hoped that all that teasing (which was literally dRENCHED in flirtations and suggestive humor) that you hoped that a smartass like tsukishima kei would finally get it

but it’s been months and none of it had worked, so you opted for a different approach

you haven’t exactly seen tsukishima jealous and you genuinely wanted to see his reaction that one of his closest friends had taken a liking for someone else

“can i ask you something?” you would start. it was something nonchalant and open ended so of course tsukishima couldn’t really say no

“hm,” he hums as he sipped on his juice box

you cleared your throat, “so there’s this guy i like...”

then a scoff leaves his lips and interrupts you

you give him a look to which his eyes immediately softened as he shook his head, “sorry, keep going.”

“aNYWAY, i’ve liked this guy for a while now and i’ve been hinting that i like him for a while now, but i’m starting to think that he might be too dense to even see.”

tsukishima’s expression was unreadable as he drank the very last of his juice box’s contents before crushing it in his hand, chucking to the other side of the room and into his trash bin

“i think that guy's an idiot.” he concludes, clearing his throat.

“really?” you said, it was almost enticing.

“yeah, honestly i think you shouldn’t be wasting your time on that guy...”

a small pout melted upon your lips as tsukishima’s golden eyes met yours

“why would you think that?”

“cause i think you should pay attention to me instead.” he said out of the blue

“hUH?”

homie really caught you off guard

like you were genuinely confused to whether or not he misspoke or if this was another one of his playful banter

“yeah right,” you muttered, picking up your pencil and continued to jot down notes in attempt to leave the subject behind

“i’m serious.” he deadpanned

your gaze flickered back up to him as you pursed your lips, biting them as you felt your heart beat pound harder against your ribs. your chest was already constricted from the thought of embarrassing yourself for even bringing it up

“who is this guy anyway?” tsukishima continues and it honestly sounded like a genuine threat.

you roll your eyes and scoff, “i was talking about you idiot!”

a small smirk appeared on his lips as if it was the most knowing and condescending look ever, “good, that’s what i thought.”

“hUH?” x2

once again your eyes were wide and confused

“there’s a reason why yamaguchi always leave us alone together.”

— k. tetsurou

it was 2am with you and kuroo being suPER delirious

as it was the start of the weekend, kuroo thought it was a good idea to hangout at your place after vb practice along with kenma

you two were literally the golden trio at nekoma, so it was a given

kenma had left hours ago around 9pm to go home, but honestly there is a good chance he’s still awake and just wanted to leave with the amount of tension between you and kuroo

not to mention he wanted to play games on his computer

kenma literally couldn't stand that awkward air between you and the vb team captain as your usual hangouts didn’t even feel normal anymore

as if you both were stepping on fragile eggshells after what happened earlier during the school day at lunch

it seems like all your advances in terms of trying to flirt with him was always flying over his head

even kenma, who sometimes didn’t pay attention to the conversation as he was too busy playing on his PSP, knew that you would often try and ask kuroo out

even if they were slightly sly and sometimes sounded like normal friendly hangouts, there were so many opportunities to turn it into sometimes, but kuroo was far too cloudy-minded to even spare that thought

but if kenma was being honest, the awkward tension between you and kuroo primarily started cause of him

he was the one who proposed the plan that you should try and make kuroo jealous. if he did have a negative reaction to you saying you liked someone else, then he liked you back. but if he didn’t, then no harm done!

honestly, it sounded like a plan and you deadass said it in the middle of lunch

you three were out in the courtyard eating your bentos when you suddenly said, “so there’s this guy i really like...”

and it immediately got kuroo’s attention

“who?” he immediately asked.

you feigned a smirk to appear on your lips as you simply shrugged to stay in the act, “just someone.” you swatted the thought away, “anyway, i’m just asking on how i should confess to them—”

“it’s yaku isn’t it?” kuroo suddenly concluded

“what? no—”

“then wHO?”

“someone who’s too stupid to see i have feelings for him!” you suddenly spew out.

kuroo’s eyes peered suspiciously at you, nodding as he turned away. “i see how it is, (y/n). i’d honestly like to meet this guy.”

“trust me, you already know.”

and perhaps that wasn’t the best thing to say as kuroo immediately started badgering you with annoying questions once again

throughout the entire day you had been rejecting to answer which basically leads to right now

you and kuroo alone at 2am in your room, sitting in awkward tension as kuroo literally refuses to leave unless you tell him who you liked

“at least give me their initials, (y/n)” the vb captain begged

“noPE!”

“please?” he continued to asked, “i’ll literally buy you all your favorite snacks, just tell me who!”

you roll your eyes, preparing to say no again, but the thought suddenly hits you

why was he so determined to know who you liked if he in fact, doesn’t have feelings for you?

“why do you care so much about who i like?” you suddenly asked

“c-cause i’m your best friend and i care about you!”

you peered your eyes at him, “kenma is also my best friend and cares about me, and yet you don’t hear him pestering me about my love life.”

you swore you saw the tiniest bit of pink blush on kuroo’s cheeks that perhaps his ears were tinted as well

he looked absolutely beautiful under the moonlight

a sigh left his lips, “because i want to be the only boy in your life.” (besides kenma, but he didn’t mention it cause it was just you and him)

you couldn’t help but feel a smile melt upon your visage, “then i guess it’s a good thing that you’re the one i like.”

— i. hajime

you and iwaizumi were staying after school as you two were on clean up duty

the hallways were pretty empty besides a few handfuls of students also cleaning classrooms or at club activities

it was just the usual, but you surely weren’t acting normal that even iwaizumi noticed

he’s one of your closest friends ever since middle school and you liked to believe that he considered you two best friends, but he usually minded his own business when it came to you

perhaps that’s what made you act so different around him

you weren’t the same (y/n) that would walk with him to and from school, the one who would eat every lunch with him and oikawa, the one who he wouldn’t have to worry about so much since oikawa was primarily his source of stress

but recently, that seemed to have transferred onto you ever since iwaizumi had been too preoccupied with oikawa and volleyball, that you making your feelings for him extremely obvious wasn’t enough

you two have been cleaning for about thirty minutes in (almost complete) silence

really, the only sound coming from the room was the clattering and squeaking of moving chairs and desks around to mop

iwaizumi wasn’t usually the one to get so fed up, especially with you

but this time was different

“so are you going to tell me what’s wrong or are you going to be childish and act like oikawa by giving me the silent treatment?” he starts and you immediately felt your body freeze, but immediately caught yourself and continued to clean

you hear him sigh defeated to which caused your body to turn towards him, “did i do something wrong?”

there was obvious hurt lacing his voice, that he perhaps jeopardized one of his closest friendships over something he didn’t know anything about

you were aware of this and immediately approached him, “you didn’t do anything wrong...” you hesitate as you didn’t know how to follow it up with, “i’m just being moody that’s all”

honestly, not your best excuse but it was workable

“then tell me what’s wrong, (y/n). i’m your best friend that’s what i’m supposed to do.”

and there it was. that look and attitude that made you fall in love with him in the first place

as if a huge wave just crashed upon you, your heartbeat intensified the moment you noticed how close you were to him

you gulped down your rising nerves, almost panicking as the words miraculously left your mouth. “i don’t think the guy i like likes me back.”

it was safe to say, that that definitely wasn’t what iwaizumi was expecting

if anything he was surprised and almost obligated as your best friend to comfort you in that moment, but he couldn’t help but feel almost betrayed

he knew he had no right to as he was nothing more than just a friend to you. so he swallowed his pride and nods with a faux smile on his lips

“it’s okay, (y/n). there’s so many other guys out there.”

then it came down like a sudden downpour, “but i only want you.”

“w-what?” it left his lips almost like a whisper as his eyes widened into saucers

“i’m talking about you, idiot.” you gently hit his hard chest, “but you obviously don’t like me back as you blatantly overlook what i say whenever i flirt with you."

“(y/n), i—”

you continued muttering in a hurried and embarrassed spiel that you didn’t even notice him trying to talk, “it’s okay, i’m ready for rejection, i just don’t want this to ruin our friendship—”

“it won’t because i literally like you too (y/n).” he finally cut in to say, taking you aback

“oh.” you say, still in shock, “cool.”

— o. tooru

you were in quite the predicament

rather than giving oikawa the silent treatment, he was giving it to you instead

basically, what happened was that perhaps you got a bit fed up with how popular oikawa was with girls and how they would often times flock him in packs sporadically throughout the day

and as if the world was out to get you, the packs of girls would always seem to come over whenever it was just you and oikawa alone

surely, from the three years you and oikawa had been friends, you’d assume that you’d get used to it

but you haven’t.

in the first two years of hs, you were pretty lenient and understanding and you truly didn’t mind it but now in your last and final year, you were tired of it

surely it didn’t help when that annoyance was fueled by your pent up feelings for oikawa in the past three years

the only reason why you hesitated to even say anything about your feelings was that you never really had the chance. with so many pretty people in and outside of aoba johsai, oikawa can be guaranteed a significant other within a snap

you felt easily replaceable, not to mention you definitely weren’t his first priority

he was too busy trying to get to nationals and to beat shiratorizawa that a relationship was the last thing on his mind

so here you two were, cleaning up the equipment in the gym in complete silence as volleyball practice had just finished as you were one of the managers

it had been like this for the past three days, being forced to physically interact, yet still not speaking to each other

like right now, you and oikawa were folding up the net neatly to eventually it got shorter and shorter that you and him had met closely in the middle

oikawa seemed to have paused the moment your hand made contact with his to make the final fold and that was when he completely broke

“ugh, i can’t take it anymore!” he exclaimed, shocking you slightly as you took the folded net from him. “i don’t get it (y/n), why can’t you just tell me who you like? i promise i’ll keep it secret!”

“be quiet,” you mutter as you turn your back towards him, “if you keep acting like this, i won’t tell you.”

he groaned once more, his feet dragging on the ground as he stumbled towards you. you froze under his touch the moment his rested his head on your shoulder.

“i just want to know cause i don’t want you to look at other guys.”

god, he was so fucking adorable

you hated to say it, but you gave into him and his charisma and how his easy words could have you complying

“fine,” you sigh, turning to face him. your breath hitched in your throat when you realize how close he was, “he’s on the volleyball team, he’s a third year—”

oikawa cut you off, “it’s iwaizumi isn’t it? i knew it! honestly, no offense to iwa, but i think i would make a better boyfriend, don’t you think?”

you couldn’t help but chuckle with a smile on your face, “you think so?”

“i know so.”

“well, fortunately for you, you’re the guy i really like.” you confessed, watching his expression brighten.

“so you made me go through three days of silent treatment just to finally date you?”

you shrug, asking, “was it worth it?” before being engulfed completely into a hug

“yes.”

a/n: this hasn’t been proofread if you couldn’t tell 👀

2K notes · View notes

skiesofthesketchy · 4 years ago

Text

Body Language - Part 2

***

Pairing: JJ Maybank x female reader

Note: Hi!! Y’all I can’t even believe how many people liked this story, like for real thank you all so much for the love and support! I hope you enjoy the second part just as much :) Again, writing smut is pretty new for me, so I hope this leaves you all hot and bothered (because GOD was I uncomfortable writing this) and I’d love to hear any feedback y’all have. Thanks SO MUCH love you. Thanks to @bricksatanakinswindow for helping me when I was STUCK.

Sorry if I tagged you if you didn’t wanna be... haha my taglist is a disaster rn. Really hoping I tagged everyone that wanted to be !

Warnings: fluffff, flirting, swearing, dirty dancing, SMUT, alcohol, 18+++

Word count: 5.3k... this long as hell, i did this for you lovelies

Part 1 (highly recommend you read part 1 first)

--------------------------------------------------

It was finally dark, and the only light came from several small bonfires littered across the boneyard. You swayed happily as you watched people equally as drunk as you dance on the designated dance floor. The music surged through your body as you closed your eyes to feel every sensation. The breeze blowing your hair away from your face, the bass from the music vibrating in your abdomen, the laughter and chatter of the party mixing in with the waves crashing on the shore.

“Whatcha thinkin ‘bout, pretty girl?” Your moment of bliss ended when your eyes snapped open, finding JJ next to you. His smile was sweet, but his eyes displayed amusement.

“Nothing in particular,” you replied. You took a sip of your beer and returned your gaze back to the dance floor. “You having a good night?”

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Are you?”

“Yeah.”

Then there was silence, JJ standing next to you with hands stuffed in his pockets, and you sighed.

It’s been two weeks since you had slept together. You wish you could say it wasn’t awkward, but it sort of was. Since then, you two haven’t had a single moment alone. Besides work and family stuff, you were usually with the other pogues, and you couldn’t really talk about what happened with them around.

Even if you guys didn’t talk about what happened that day, you just wanted to hang out with him. At least then, you’d be reassured that your friendship was still the same, that the night you got carried away with each other didn’t change a thing. You were scared though, that maybe things had changed.

For one, you couldn’t stop thinking about him. You had seen JJ in a totally different light. That night, he wasn’t just your reckless, womanizing best friend. He was the man kissing up and down your body, making every inch of you feel safe and loved. He was the man bringing you to your high over and over again as he thrusted his hips into yours. The man that caressed your skin and left sweet kisses on your neck and shoulder as you finally drifted to sleep in his arms. He was everything, but you pushed your feelings away, deciding it was just amazing sex and that was the only reason you missed him so much.

One thing was clear to you, though. Sex with JJ was a one time thing. It always was when it came to him. It was only ever going to be a casual night of fun, and you were okay with that. At least you hoped you would be. Either way, you just wanted to know you still had your best friend.

The two of you basked in the painful silence, each of you not knowing what to say to the other. You didn’t let it show on your face, but it felt like your heart was breaking. This wasn’t what you wanted. If you knew things were going to be weird, you wouldn’t have kissed him in the first place.

“Do you wanna dance?” he asked you. You looked up at him for the first time in what felt like an eternity. He hated the awkwardness just as much, and decided it was bullshit. You guys were best friends, so he was going to break the ice, even if it meant talking it out and finding out that you regretted that night he thought about so often.

You smiled, taking his hand that he offered to you. He spun you around, making you giggle as you fell into his chest after the spontaneous twirl. “There’s that laugh,” he smiled. You beamed as he led you to the dance floor, thinking maybe things aren’t so bad between you two after all.

The speakers played some obscure slow song, which encouraged JJ to wrap his arms around your waist and start to sway. You laughed while placing your arms around his neck. “I heard you’ve been dodging dudes all night,” he said as you two found a steady rhythm together.

“I don’t really feel like socializing with tourons tonight,” you shrugged. The corners of his mouth turned up. “What about you? Why aren’t you trying to get with any of the tourons swooning over you?” You quirked your brow, humor laced in your tone.

“No need. I’m already the luckiest guy here.”

“Why’s that?” you asked.

“Cause I’m dancing with you, stupid.” He laughed as realization lit up your face, and you felt heat rush to your cheeks, the butterflies waking up in your stomach. He looked down at you with a dopey smile on his face, loving the sight of you.

While you hadn’t been able to get JJ off your mind, he was struggling just the same. He had already decided that asking you what girls like in bed was most likely the best decision he’s ever made in his whole damn life. The feelings that he’d always had for you only grew tenfold. Before, he kept them so hidden, simmering in the depths of his heart without giving them any of his focus or energy, knowing that you’d never be interested in being more than friends. After that night though, he wondered if he might actually have a chance.

The way you initiated everything with confidence had him completely wrapped around your finger. The way you tugged on his hair while moaning out his name had him lying awake at night with an image of you swimming in his mind. The way you kissed him so passionately had him wondering if he’d ever feel such desire for another girl again. He thought, just maybe, you felt the same things he did.

“You look gorgeous,” he said, pulling you closer so your head was resting in the crook of his neck.

“Why thank you, good sir. You look handsome as well.” JJ chuckled softly into your hair, enjoying the scent of your shampoo. You two swayed like that for a moment, just holding each other and relaxing into one another’s touch. You both were relieved that the tension seemed to be gone. Everything was perfect, and you didn’t know why you were so worried in the first place.

There was a thought floating around in the back of your mind though. The tiniest whisper of the turmoil you’ve been going through for the past two weeks. Could you possibly like JJ as more than just a friend?

You pulled away from his embrace when the song changed. The people around you jumped and swayed drunkenly to the more upbeat music as you grabbed JJ’s hands to dance with him. He watched you with a grin on his face as you danced wildly, making his arms flail around with your hands clasped in his. “Come on, J. Get into it,” you laughed.

You grabbed his hips to help him start moving, and he chuckled at your attempts to get him to actually dance. “How ‘bout you just dance around me and make me look good, babe.” You glared teasingly at his smug expression, but decided you could do him one better.

“Fine.” You suddenly spun around and placed his hands on your hips. He took this opportunity to pull you against him, your back flush against his chest. You caught him completely by surprise as you ground your hips back into his, oh so subtly, smirking once you heard the tiniest grunt escape his lips.

You swayed your hips side to side, JJ following your every move with his body attached to yours. Your hands fell over his as you guided them to drag down to your thighs, then back up again to your hips. JJ’s insides seemed to ignite from the way you moved against him. Your confidence bubbling to the surface gave him flashbacks from the night you kissed him, the night you two became closer than you ever were.

You continued to grind against your friend, your hands reaching up behind you to grasp at his long blonde locks. You don’t know where this confidence came from, but you guessed it was the alcohol. JJ definitely didn’t seem to mind your flirty dancing though, and that helped ease your mind. Your eyes widened when you felt his growing erection press into your ass.

Your first instinct was to stop your movements, but you couldn’t deny the excitement that swelled inside of you. He was enjoying this as much as you were, so you let your doubts slip to the back of your mind and ground into him once again.

JJ grunted again, which gave you immense satisfaction until he held you still by his aggressive hold on your hips. “What do you think you’re doing, Y/N?” he whispered, lips brushing the shell of your ear. You would have been disheartened by his question if his voice wasn’t so raspy.

“What do you mean?” you asked, feigning innocence. You slowly dipped down into a squat before coming back up, your ass making contact with his groin once more, and JJ fought to hold in a moan.

He abruptly turned you around so you were face to face, bodies just as close as before. “You know exactly what I mean.” This time, he was the one to grind his hips forward, and you gasped at the feeling of his hard-on pressing into your front. His eyes were glazed over in desire, and just the sight made your heart rate pick up. “You’re driving me crazy.”

You smiled at his confession, and you felt a familiar tingle start in your abdomen. You laced your arms around his neck and pushed your chest into his. He stayed perfectly still as he watched your face inch closer to his, eyes fluttering shut on instinct. He prepared for your lips to meet his, but you kissed his jaw instead.

You pressed soft kisses down his jawline and on his throat, the boy not being able to do anything besides experience every single sensation you thrust upon him. Your hands traveled down his chest as you pulled away from him, not being able to hide your satisfaction. He was so turned on, and you loved that you were able to make him this way.

“Hey, where are you going?” he growled, grabbing you again by your waist and pulling you against him.

You laughed. “I thought I was driving you crazy?” Your eyebrow lifted teasingly, and he groaned.

“Which is exactly why I’m gonna drag you out of this fucking party and have my way with you.” One of his hands came up to your neck, thumb caressing your jaw, his tenderness leaving you breathless.

Despite your resolve unraveling by the second, you wanted to keep up your teasing. “Me? Don’t you have some hot touron to get back to?”

He pulled you closer and rested his forehead on yours, obviously not amused by your comment. “Y/N...” he rasped, eyes boring into yours.

You smirked, batting your eyelashes. “Yes, Maybank?”

He couldn’t hold back anymore. He closed the small distance between you and crashed his lips onto yours. Your arms naturally circled around his neck once again as you matched his eagerness and gave in to him.

Kissing him, all of your doubts and confusion about your relationship with JJ seemed to vanish as you allowed your body to melt into him. It was obvious now that he wanted you just as much as you wanted him. The crowded party full of drunk people dancing became an afterthought as you let yourself be completely engulfed in the alluring man that is your best friend. The kiss was fueled by passion and the heat of the moment was quickly becoming too much to bear.

You pulled away abruptly, and he let out a sound of annoyance. “Let’s get out of here,” you said, eyes gleaming.

He smiled before pecking your lips again. “Yes ma’am.” You kept your body close to cover him as he reached into his pants to tuck his erection into the waistband of his shorts so that others wouldn’t be able to see the noticeable tent. He grabbed your hand and quickly started leading you away from the dance floor and across the beach.

Unbeknownst to you, the other pogues had watched the entire scene unfold.

“What the fuck is happening right now?” John B. asked, jaw resuming its previous position on the floor.

Kiara and Pope didn’t have an answer as they watched you two practically run off hand in hand. “I think they’re gonna go fuck,” Pope said, voice distant as if he couldn’t believe the words himself.

“When the hell did this happen?” Kie asked, looking to the two boys. But they only shrugged. All of them were completely in the dark about your previous hook up, and seeing you and JJ so intimate had them all more than shocked.

“Good for them, I guess?” Pope offered. John B. laughed, taking another swig of his beer. Kiara laughed too with a shake of her head.

“Can’t wait to confront them about this tomorrow.” The boys nodded in agreement, the group suddenly finding it hilarious that two of their best friends were hooking up.

You and JJ had made it into the van and he drove back to the Chateau like a mad man. You told him the pogues would be pissed that you guys left them without a ride, but he didn’t care in the slightest. All he could think about was you lying underneath him, begging for him to make you cum.

It wasn’t long before you were stumbling into the small house, JJ’s lips trying to capture yours while guiding you to the bedroom he slept in. You giggled when he tripped over the coffee table and fell into you. It was so chaotic, but you didn’t mind. It felt as if you were giddy teenagers in love, too excited to get to the bedroom to care about anything else.

“Fucking finally,” he huffed when you two were in his room, and he slammed the door shut. You sat on the bed, looking at him with the biggest smile on your face. The thing you wanted more than anything for the last two weeks was standing right in front of you, gawking at you like you were the most beautiful girl in the world.

He crawled over you, and you promptly laid on your back, staring up at your long-time best friend. “So did those little tricks I taught you help you in the bedroom?” you asked playfully, even though you didn’t really want to think about JJ sleeping with other girls.

He scoffed, putting more of his weight on you as his face inched closer. “I haven’t been with anyone since.” This caused confusion to cross your features. JJ was the biggest manslut you knew. It was uncommon for him to go more than a week without hooking up with someone.

“Really?” The question fell from your lips involuntarily.

JJ laughed while brushing your hair away from your face. “How could I when the only girl I think about is you?” His eyes pierced into yours, and you could tell he was being sincere. What shocked you more than his words was the way he looked at you. If you weren’t mistaken, it kinda looked like he was in love.

You were glowing. You didn’t know how badly you wanted to hear the words until he spoke them. With arms wrapping behind his neck, you pulled him down to catch his lips with yours. The kiss was soft and warm, making your stomach erupt in butterflies. It suddenly felt like there was no rush now that you two were alone in each other’s arms, which was sweet and had you grinning like a child at the carnival. But the truth is that you couldn’t wait to get the boy undressed.

With considerable strength, you pushed JJ off of you and he fell to your side. He looked at you confused, but chuckled when you situated yourself on top of him, straddling his hips. You swiftly peeled off your shirt before leaning over him and kissing him again. “Someone’s eager,” he smirked against your lips.

“Shut up,” you grumbled. You sat up and pulled him up with you by tugging on the collar of his shirt. You didn’t waste any time pulling the material up over his head, and he laughed again. “Damn, baby. If I knew you wanted me this bad, I would’ve gotten you alone sooner.” He was teasing you, and you weren’t amused.

“I said shut up, Maybank.” He was going to laugh again, loving how impatient you were, but you surely shut him up by crashing your lips to his once again. Warm hands caressed your sides with thumbs skimming your ribcage as the kiss quickly turned into a hungry battle between tongues. You ground into his lap to find his erection growing again, and the excitement only fueled your movements.

You got off of him and started unbuttoning his shorts. He lifted his hips to help you slide the shorts and boxers down his legs, and they fell to the floor along with his shoes. Entranced by the sight of his cock, you were about to get on your knees, but he grabbed your hands to stop you. “Hey, hey, easy baby. Let’s get you out of these clothes first.” You didn’t miss the smug expression on his face.

You were standing in front of him from where he sat on the edge of the bed, and he reached behind you to unclasp your bra. He pulled you closer by your waist so that he could attach his mouth to one of your nipples. You raked your fingers through his hair as he started leaving trails of open mouth kisses on your chest, hands unbuttoning your shorts and tugging them down your legs along with your panties.

You felt your arousal grow with each hot kiss he pressed onto your skin. He moved slowly, as if he was savoring the taste of every inch of your body, all for him. The attention he was giving your breasts with each swipe of his tongue and twist of his rough fingertips made you dizzy. Somewhere in the back of your mind, you realized that this was far more intimate than just sex.

You softly tugged his hair to pull his face away from your skin, and he looked up at you with a grin. With hands on his flushed cheeks, you kissed him fiercely and he could feel the burning hunger from within you. As much as you enjoyed soft and loving JJ, you needed him right now.

Your lips moved to his jaw and you kissed down his throat while your hands traveled down his sculpted torso. Your kisses trailed down his abs to underneath his belly button as you slowly got onto your knees, and JJ was holding his breath in anticipation, fingers weaving through your hair to collect it in a loose ponytail.

When you two hooked up, the way he pleasured you with his mouth had you thinking about it constantly ever since. You hadn’t returned the favor though, so you were excited to finally have your hands on him. You didn’t think you’d ever get the chance again, so who could blame you for being a little eager? You wanted to see the man unravel in front of you as you took control with your lips wrapped around him.

You took his stiff length in your hand and pumped a few times as you glanced up at JJ through your lashes. His cheeks were already turning red from arousal. The sight of you on your knees was enough for him to throw you on the bed and finally bury himself into you, but he held back. He’d be an idiot to stop you now.

He gasped when you took him in your mouth, his tip hitting your soft palate. With a swipe of your tongue underneath the head, he involuntarily bucked his hips up into your face. You had just begun, and he was already finding it hard to control himself.

You held his hips down firmly as you started to slowly bob your head. You would switch between taking as much of him as you could without gagging and only focusing on his swollen head. His grip on your hair tightened when you harshly grazed the tip of his cock with your tongue, his head falling back with the most beautiful moan you’d ever heard. “You are so sexy,” he choked out.

You smiled as more moans fell from his lips, and you could tell he was close. “Fuck, baby. Just like that,” he panted. You loved that you could make him feel this good even more than you enjoyed blowing him. You released your hold on his hips so that your right hand could wrap around him and pump while you sucked harder, head bobbing faster.

“Fuck, Y/N. Fuck.” ‘He’s so close. Only a little longer,’ you thought, heart racing as exhaustion started to creep up on you, but you didn’t care. You wanted him to explode with your lips still around him, knowing you had done a job well done.

Without warning, he pulled you away from him by his grip on your hair. He hadn’t cum, and you were confused. You didn’t have time to ask him why as he was already picking you up and throwing you onto the bed, your hair fanning around your head on the pillow as you bounced onto it.

“As much as I love that pretty little mouth of yours, it’s my turn,” he rasped, holding himself over you with arms on either side of your head.

He looked so damn good, messy blonde locks falling over his dark blue eyes, lips pouted and cheeks tinged pink. He kissed you hard as he thrusted his hips into you, his stiff member brushing against your clit. You hadn’t realized how aroused you already were just from sucking him off, and you gasped at the contact.

His lips left yours and hungrily attached to the pocket between your neck and collarbone as his fingers traveled down your body to prod at your clit. He was sucking on your skin harshly and it was clear he wanted to leave a mark. He wanted everyone to know that you were his, even though you two hadn’t talked about your relationship yet. He didn’t know how you felt, but he was certain that he couldn’t get enough of you.

“JJ,” you panted. You tried to push the man away, but he wouldn’t let up. Two long fingers had dipped easily into your wet entrance, teasing you by not going in too far. His thumb rubbed slow circles onto your clit, and as good as it felt, it wasn’t enough for you.

You wound your hand into his hair and tugged, making his gaze meet yours. God, how he loved you pulling his hair. “Stop teasing,” you said. He smirked before pecking your lips, his hand resuming the painfully slow action. He basked in the sight of you squeezing your eyes shut, trying to hold in your moans. “Seriously, J,” you grumbled. “If you’re not going to do something, then get the hell off of me and I’ll take control.”

You thought he might’ve complied, but of course he didn’t. Your impatience was much too amusing for him, and his dopey grin made you want to punch him. “Not a chance, princess.” You huffed, getting annoyed as you felt the knot in your stomach start to tighten, much too slow for your liking. “I like you like this, begging for me to make you feel good.”

“JJ...” you warned.

“I think you could do a bit more begging, don’t you think, Y/N?” You hated his cocky smirk. You had no idea he was such a fucking tease.

“J, please,” you sighed, almost a whisper. If he didn’t do something soon, you swore you’d shove him off of you and take care of it yourself.

Suddenly, his two fingers rammed into your core, connecting harshly with your g-spot. “Fuck!” you screamed. He smiled, bringing his face down to leave more kisses on your neck as his hand picked up speed and rammed into you over and over. Moans were escaping your mouth and getting louder, your control lessening with each thrust of his hand.

It was only moments later than you were shaking from your climax, JJ grinning over you as you cried his name. You were kind of surprised that you hadn’t lasted long, but peering up at the man hovering over you, you figured out why. Just looking at him turned you on. The feelings you had been ignoring resurfaced and you knew that you’d never be able to look at your best friend in the same way again.

It wasn’t just how skillful he was in bed, it was everything else on top of it. You had been friends for years and had always clicked so well, so you’re not sure why possibly loving JJ never crossed your mind until now. “What are you thinkin ‘bout, pretty girl?” he broke you out of your thoughts. You laughed at his repeated words from earlier in the night.

“You,” you beamed. You reached your hand up to brush his hair away from his face, his blue eyes gleaming bright.

“Oh yeah? What about me?” You shook your head, trying to find the words, but you were at a loss with how good he looked, his perfect lips so close to yours. “About how amazing I am at sex?” He was only joking, and tickled your sides, eliciting uncontrollable laughter from you.

“About how good I make you feel? Huh? How I can make you cum in a matter of minutes?” he continued to guess as he relentlessly tickled you. You were laughing and trying your hardest to push him away from you and stop his attack, but your efforts were useless. “Tell me, baby,” he chuckled, knowing you couldn’t get a word out.

“JJ, jesus christ, stop!” He laughed again, then stopped touching you all together, slumping into the spot next to you on the bed.

“I hate you,” you gasped, trying your hardest to catch your breath while turning on your side to look at him.

“No way. You love me,” he smiled, placing a soft kiss onto the tip of your nose.

“I think I do.” You didn’t know why you said it, it just felt right. You’d never been scared to tell him anything before, so why should this be any different. His eyes never left yours, but confusion and doubt swam in them and he didn’t say anything. “I think I love you.”

Then he was grinning. He pulled you into his chest and kissed you more passionately than previously tonight. You laughed into the kiss, taking it as a good sign. “I think I love you too,” he said after pulling away. Now you were the one smiling.

Who knew you’d be confessing your love to your best friend, cuddling naked in his bed? You certainly couldn’t have pictured this moment a few weeks ago. You kissed him again and let yourself enjoy his warmth. You both felt like you were on top of the world, in the comfort of each other’s embrace. It was all so new but felt so familiar at the same time.

You crawled on top of him and was reminded of his erection, something you still hadn’t taken care of yet. With one more peck to his lips, you reached over him to the bedside table where you knew he kept the condoms.

He watched you intensely, hands running up and down your thighs as you opened up the wrapper with your teeth. You took the liberty of sliding the rubber over his cock, and you both were more than ready for what was coming next.

You slid his length into your entrance and lowered yourself until all of him was in you, unable to hold in your gasp. He rubbed comforting circles into your hips as you adjusted to his size. Once you did, you were bouncing fast, not willing to waste any more time. He loved the sight of you, your tits bouncing and your lips parted, sounds of pleasure spilling out of them.

Both of his hands grabbed at your boobs roughly, making you whimper in pleasure as you tried to speed up your movements. The grunts that escaped from his mouth were cheering you on, and you ignored your sore muscles as you chased your high, but you were more concerned that he reached his.

“This okay, J?” you asked breathlessly.

“Baby,” he moaned. “You’re fucking incredible.” He pulled you down by the back of your neck to crash your lips together. You both hummed and moaned into each other’s mouths as you continued to ride him, both of you getting closer and closer.

He could tell you were slowing down and getting tired, so he swiftly flipped you over so that he was on top. He was between your legs and firmly held your thighs apart as he picked up where you left off. He kissed you one last time before sitting up on his knees and ramming into you roughly.

Your second orgasm of the night was quickly approaching, the knot in your stomach winding tightly. Your hands grasped at the sheets as he pounded into you, over and over. His name was lost in your series of moans, his getting louder by the second. You both were only moments from release.

He switched his position from kneeling in front of you to placing his forearms on either side of your head, the new angle making you cry out. “Look at me, Y/N,” he rasped, begging you to open your eyes. His were glazed over in lust just like yours, and you held his gaze as he thrusted into you, his movements becoming desperate.

“I love you, baby,” he said, and you repeated his words back to him, both of you lost in the pleasure, thoughts getting fuzzy. “Are you close?” All you could do was nod as you bit your bottom lip to hold in your noises. “Cum for me, Y/N.” And you did.

It was only three more thrusts until he was cumming with you, hips bucking sporadically to ride out both your highs. No words were exchanged as he laid on top of you, exhaustion and complete euphoria clouding the room. His head rested in the crook of your neck as you both fought to catch your breaths, and you could still feel him twitch inside of you.

“You’re fucking amazing,” he whispered, kissing your neck. “I love you. I mean it.”

You grinned. As confused as you were only hours ago, you knew now that you loved him too. You caressed his soft cheek with your thumb, gazing at the man that just offered himself completely to you.

“I love you too,” you smiled softly, kissing him again. It was warm and sweet, your bodies molded together. It was like nothing mattered except for this moment right here.

“What the fuck are we gonna tell the pogues?” he asked. You just laughed with a shrug.

“We’ll think about that later.” You rolled over so that you were on top of him now, admiring his happy face underneath you before you kissed him again.

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Tags: @sunwardsss @xx-randomshit-xx17 @kikinuke2 @prince-pope @pm-my-hubbies @chickenfirstboyslater @sexualparkour @danicarosaline @pink-meringues @obxmxybxnk @rudyypankow @rudyismymanperiod @popcsheyward @lunaposey

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Masterlist

#jj maybank #outerbanks #outer banks #body language #skiesofthesketchy #jj maybank x reader #pope heyward #john b. routledge #kiara carrera #outer banks fic #outer banks smut #jj maybank smut #jj maybank fic #jj x reader #obx #bricksatans

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hongism · 4 years ago

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ignition ➻ h. hyunjin 18+

➻ pairing: hwang hyunjin x fem!reader

➻ wc: 2.7k

➻ genre: some fluff, mostly smut, pwp

➻ rating: M

➻ summary: you like it best when hyunjin speeds things up and gets straight to business

➻ warnings: explicit content, oral: f receiving, face sitting kinda, fingering, creampie, kitchen sex, hair pulling, biting, marking, this is pretty tame ngl, hyunjin is an implied switch, as is reader, but he leans more dom in this, and reader leans more sub

➻ a/n: this is for my lovely amazing incredible friend @thinksshesawolf who suffered tremendously because of a certain ponytail man bless her heart bc she has to suffer with me rn thank u daija ily

☽ ☾

“Hey, how was work?” Hyunjin greets as you step through the doorframe. It’s late – later than usual for your work shift – and you feel as though you’ve been on your feet for over twenty hours. It’s a close enough estimation because your shift was so damn long, but seeing your precious boyfriend at the end of the day makes it all worth it.

“Just okay, I guess. I missed you,” you mutter as you push the door shut behind you. Hyunjin laughs under his breath, getting up from the couch to meet you by the door. His arms find your waist and fold around your body. You let him pull you against his chest, burying your face into his black tee, and he mimics your action by pressing his nose to the junction of your throat.

The two of you remain like that for a few moments. A comfortable silence lingers over you, and you let yourself just melt against his large form. After a small period of quiet, Hyunjin begins to murmur against your skin, his breath hot on you. You can’t keep a small sigh from escaping your lips.

“Just okay? That won’t do,” he mumbles. His teeth nip at your neck teasingly, and you bring a hand down against his shoulder.

“Shame on you,” you say through a laugh. “How was practice? Are you ready for the race?”

“Always,” Hyunjin answers as he pulls back to look you in the eye. Your hands drag over his shoulders, brushing along the material of his jacket. He must not have changed since getting home from his practice drive, but you are more than okay with that because his racing uniform suits him so well that you can’t resist him in it. His smile lingers as he watches your eyes trail over his form.

“You planned this, didn’t you?” You scoff when you see his teasing grin. Hyunjin shakes his head, a loose chunk of long brown hair falling to the front of his face. You resist the urge to brush it out of the way and kiss the place where the hair touched, at least until he admits to his cheeky behavior.

“Only a little. Not much, of course.”

“Not much? What part of this is not much, Hwang Hyunjin?” You throw your head back with a loud laugh, hands gripping the edge of his jacket. Your partner doesn’t answer; instead, his hands slide from your waist to cup your ass and he pulls your legs up around him with little effort. You cling to him tighter as he moves you. “Why do I love you?”

“Why indeed, baby? You tell me.” Hyunjin’s tone is nothing if not teasing. He leans closer to you, lips brushing across your cheek. He pulls away as you tilt your head to connect your lips with his. You puff your cheeks full of air and send a half-hearted glare his way.

“I’m wondering why more and more with each passing second, to be honest.” It’s Hyunjin’s turn to release a full-fledged laugh, and he tugs you closer before moving away from the entryway of the apartment. “Set me down, Hyunjin. Please.”

“I will. In a moment. Lemme just look at my beautiful girlfriend for a minute.” Hyunjin’s eyes drink in every curve of your face, trailing over your features with such love in his expression that it’s almost overwhelming. He carries you towards the kitchen rather than the bedroom. You honestly expected him to go straight for the bed since that’s usually where he prefers to have sex with you, but now he moves for the counter and sets you atop it with little to no effort. His arms drop to the marble, effectively caging you in. Neither of you can look away from each other; both so enamored with each other’s faces that you nearly fall into the sink on the counter. Your surprise morphs into a laugh as Hyunjin catches you before you completely collapse, and he laughs along with you before scooting you to the side of the sink.

“This is what the bedroom is for, Jinnie.”

Hyunjin ignores your protests in favor of leaning closer to you and pressing his lips against the column of your neck. He makes quick work of you, immediately finding the most sensitive place on your skin, and he nips at your nerves until a slew of soft sighs leaves your lips. You comb your fingers through his long hair. He doesn’t have it up today the way you like it, although you’re certain that he did that on purpose so you can put it up for him later. Still, you enjoy the sensation of his soft hair between your fingers and gently brush through the locks as he continues to suck at your neck. He pulls back with a sigh, hot breath fanning over saliva and causing a shiver to overtake your body in an instant. His lips make a path up to your neck and brush against the underside of your jaw.

“I suppose I have to forgive you for plotting like this,” you mutter as he kisses you.

“So you still love me?” He laughs in response. You pull your fingers out of his hair and lean away from his touch to look him in the eye.

“For now,” you tease, unable to hold back the smile playing at your lips.

“Hm, well I suppose I’ll have to do a lot better than this in order to make you love me forever.” Hyunjin’s tongue darts out to brush over his top lip. Your eyes flit down to watch the movement, and he sees your lingering stare within a second. He takes hold of your wrist, fingers dancing across your skin in such a delicate way that you barely feel the touch. Soft lips brush over your fingers and kiss a path up to your wrist where a hair tie rests around your skin. He catches the band between his teeth. With a sharp tug, he pulls the band off your wrist and cradles it softly between his teeth. One brows quirks upwards as he looks at you with the rubber in his mouth. It takes a moment but you realize what he wants you to do with it.

“You’re the devil,” you say in a soft tone. Hyunjin cocks his head to the side, hairband dangling in a teasing way from his lips. You take it from him with a small shake of your head and pop it around your fingers before tugging his long locks back. His eyes flutter shut from the delicate contact. A small hum leaves his lips as you run your fingers across his scalp, and he leans his head against your chest to give you better access to his hair. You tie the bundle of hair together with the tie and tighten it with a small tug. “There. Happy, princess?”

Hyunjin stands up straight again with a slight chuckle. His hands slide to your hips, and in one swift motion, he pulls you to the edge of the counter. Fingers dig under the waistband of your pants and hook your underwear as well. You release a small gasp as Hyunjin yanks the material down. You all but squeal when the cold counter touches your ass, clinging to Hyunjin for dear life. He laughs at your misery rather than helping you, however, and follows the same path your pants and underwear just took to the floor until he is kneeling in front of the counter, his face opposite your already heated core. He exhales, and the warm breath causes chills to run over your whole body when the air touches your folds.

“You’re going to sit there and tease me all night, aren’t you?” You ask through gritted teeth, glaring down at the man perched between your legs. He grins up at you, lips like a cheshire in the way he smiles, and you resist the urge to wrap your legs around his neck and pull him against your warmth. He places his hands firmly on your hips as though sensing your urges.

“As much as I would really love to do that, I’m more in the mood to get straight to business, baby girl.” Hyunjin murmurs as he tugs you closer to his face.

You love when he’s a bit impatient; needy and desperate to get straight to business and fuck you without any inhibitions. Those sorts of moods always leave you begging for more in the best way, and seeing him really assert that dominance over you is always a surprise since he doesn’t show it often otherwise. He teases your folds with the flat of his tongue, immediately causing your gut to coil and fill with heat.

“Besides, it looks like someone is already needy. I can’t keep my baby girl waiting too long, can I?” Hyunjin purrs against your core. He brings two fingers down to your folds, pressing the open so he has better access with his tongue. He keeps chatting to a minimum after that comment, and you’ve never been more grateful for silence because of the way his skilled tongue is pressing against your slit like he’s a man starved. One of your hands finds his hair, digging into the locks you just tied back as his tongue flicks against your sensitive bead. Your head falls back from the contact. His fingers press against you tighter as his tongue moves lower and lower until he prods at your entrance. A slight hum falls from his lips when he reaches it, the vibrations reverberate through your whole body, and you quiver under Hyunjin’s grasp.

“Hy-Hyunjin,” you stammer as his tongue pushes into you. The pads of his fingers work small circles around your clit, and all sense of coherent thought leaves your mind at the pleasure. He pulls off your core with an almost embarrassing pop, and your juices shine on the bottom half of his face. Eyes dark with lust stare up at you. Slowly, he moves to his feet again, hand remaining on your folds and tracing the same small circles over them. He leans closer to your face and crashes his lips against yours. You taste yourself on his lips but as his tongue pushes into your mouth and fingers into your pussy, you don’t have time to think about that even for a second.

“We can take it slow and make love some other time, but right now…” Hyunjin trails off, exhaling into your mouth, and you grip his hair tighter. His fingers are working magic between your legs. Despite his shallow thrusts, he curves them into you at just the right angle, and it has you practically singing a chorus of moans against his lips as he kisses you. “I need you right now,” He growls against your mouth, voice low and gravely from the lust coursing through him.

“Then take me,” you whisper in response, holding him close to your body by his hair. His fingers stay in you a little while longer, however, and continue to work you open to get you ready for the stretch of his member. You squirm against him as though it’ll make him speed up, but even in these hasty moods, Hyunjin always insists on making certain that you are prepped properly for him.

“And here I thought I was the impatient one.” Hyunjin chuckles at your movements and pulls his fingers out from your dripping cunt. “Ready for me, are you?” You nod along to your boyfriend’s words, hands already moving down to the prominent bulge in his pants, and you tug at the material almost desperately. Hyunjin pushes your hands aside with a soft swatting motion. He takes scare of the action for you, popping the middle button and tugging his zipper down. With a quick tug, he pulls his pants down far enough to expose his underwear, just under the bulge of his restrained cock.

“Please just hurry up,” you beg, pawing at the bulge behind his underwear. Hyunjin heeds your pleas, thank goodness, and pulls the band of his underwear down, freeing his hard cock at long last. The tip is already leaking precum, a thin layer over his slit, and you reach down to thumb over the moisture. Hyunjin exhales at the contact. His head falls forward, forehead meeting yours. You both breathe out at the same time, and the air intermingles before you. He presses closer to you as you guide his cock to your entrance, lining it up with you dripping core.

“Hey…” He says. Ther’s a sense of hesitation in his movements all the sudden, and you look up to his eyes to see what’s wrong. “I-I just – I love you so much, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Jinnie. More than anything.” You cup his cheek and lean against him. Your lips meet in a soft kiss, slotting together like the last two pieces of a puzzle. He pushes further against you. Lust comes back to his movements, his moves with sudden haste, and pushes his member into you, continuing to fill you up until he’s completely buried in you. You both sit still for a moment, just basking in the sensation of being so close like this.

You shift your hips in efforts to prompt Hyunjin to start moving. He smirks at your teasing movements, then pulls halfway out before burying himself in you again. He builds up a steady pace like that; a slow pull out then a swift thrust back in, and with each thrust he seems to hit deeper in you. A slew of moans leaves your lips as he continues to fuck you. Soft grunts come from him, your noises together making a sweet symphony of pleasure. You lean back on the counter and let him tug you closer to the edge until your ass is all but hanging off it. The curve is awkward and a tad painful on your back, but each thrust brings you more pleasure than the last and you barely think about the strain on your back as he fucks you.

One thrust in particular nearly makes you fall, however, and you lurch upwards to grab hold of Hyunjin and steady yourself.

“H-Hyunjin, ho–old on,” you stammer out. He slows his thrust immediately upon hearing your words, looking to your eyes for any sign of discomfort. “Th-The counter is a bit uncomfortable on my back.” Part of you is embarrassed to have to stop him like this, but there is only love and affection in his gaze as he looks at you.

“Let’s move then.” Hyunjin lifts you off the counter with ease, folding your legs around his body. You think he’s going to head for the bedroom this time, but he takes you by surprise yet again and instead goes for the empty wall beside the fridge. He props you up against it with careful hands. His eyes search yours, waiting for a sign of confirmation that this is okay, and you give him a slow nod.

His thrusts pick up pace again. This angle is much better for you in that he hits even deeper and the tip of his cock prods your sweet spot with each dragging thrust. Your moans fall with increased fervor. Your high is approaching quickly, and you know that Hyunjin is suffering more than you are because the sweat on his brow is dripping onto your leg.

You don’t have a chance to warn him before your orgasm hits. Your velvet walls clench around his member, squeezing him tight, and your lips fall open into a silent scream. Hyunjin follows soon after, spilling into you with a low groan. Your fingers hold onto his hair still with a softening grip. It takes a moment for the two of you to come down from the high. Your breaths are heavy as the two of you drink in the afterglow of your orgasms.

“Round two?” Hyunjin chuckles as he pulls his softening member out of your filled pussy. You whine as cold air replaces his warmth, hands falling from his hair to his shoulders. You brace yourself as he lifts you onto his waist again, and a small laugh escapes you when his lips press against your jaw.

“You have too much stamina,” you whine. Hyunjin hums in response, saying nothing else as he carries you to the bedroom. “We can’t stay up late though, because your race is tomorrow.”

“Hm, we’ll see about that. No promises.”

☽ ☾

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just-stop · 4 years ago

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From AFLW to roller derby, experts say its time to take concussion in women's sport seriously

When the Crows chase their third AFLW premiership on Saturday, captain Chelsea Randall will be watching from the sidelines.

A concussion from a collision during last week's preliminary final left her ruled out of the match.

It's a bitter sweet way to end a season — but as Sarah McCarthy knows, a concussion can have much longer consequences

In 2016, Sarah was the jammer for her Sydney roller derby team, skating at high speed in the league's Grand Final, aiming to get past the opposition and score points.

Risks of contact sport

Sarah McCarthy received a knock to the head during a roller derby match.

"I was a few feet in front of the pack, looking over my shoulder," she tells ABC RN's Sporty.

As she skated, a competitor's elbow hit Sarah's neck and jaw hard and she crashed to the ground.

She doesn't remember if she passed out or not, but recalls feeling briefly sick.

She got up, sat out for awhile, but later re-joined the bout, feeling reasonably ok.

It was Sarah's second concussion that week, having had an earlier blow at training.

The next few months passed in a blur of sickness, dizziness and ringing ears.

"I could barely make it past lunch time without falling asleep. My head felt like it was in a vice 24 hours a day," she says.

What was worse, says Sarah, was the memory loss, heightened emotions, and constant haze in her mind as she struggled to manage a big work project.

Sarah's experience is not out of the ordinary. Experts say sportswomen are at higher risk of concussion than male athletes, and the effects of concussion in women tend to be more severe.

Sarah still lives with the ongoing after effects of her concussion even today.

Almost five years on, Sarah continues to live with the implications of Post Concussion Syndrome.

"I struggled verbally, and I still do now if I have a poor night's sleep," Sarah says.

"It's almost like I'm sitting on a chair in a room with a curtain around me and all of my vocabulary is just beyond the curtain. And I can't reach it or I use the wrong words. I forget people's name all the time," she says.

"I'm fatigued every day. I still can't exercise. I can't handle stress, I can't handle light, I can't handle sounds."

What happens when you're concussed?

Dr Adrian Cohen, an emergency and trauma physician who researches concussion prevention, says concussion is not as simple as was once thought.

He says concussion results in less blood flow to the brain.

This means brain cells, called neurons, don't get enough oxygen and glucose. They also suffer a "structural deformity".

Basically, Dr Cohen says, the brain has a "metabolic crisis" and neurons stop working properly.

Why is concussion more common in women?

We don't have enough data on the size of the problem, Dr Cohen says.

But research and scrutiny of concussion in women in sport is growing — largely in the wake of developments in elite men's sport such as the AFL and NFL.

"Doctors like myself who work in this area are definitely seeing it more often and we're seeing it with more severity," Dr Cohen says.

He says women sustain more concussions than men in high-impact sports such as rugby league, rugby union and Australian rules football. Women also take longer to recover.

One possibility is that women may be more likely to report concussion.

But Dr Cohen says there are complex physiological factors at play.

"There are structural differences between men and women's brains," he says.

"They actually have a slightly faster metabolism than male brains, and they have slightly greater oxygen flow to the head.

"The cells themselves can be thought of as being slightly hungrier. So in the context of an injury that disrupts the supply of glucose and oxygen, it can help explain why they suffer more damage."

He also says women are joining high impact sports without years of tackle training and have had less opportunity to build up the strong neck muscles crucial in protecting against impact.

Dr Cohen says these factors are not an argument for reducing women's participation in contact sport — the benefits, he says, far outweigh the risks — but he is urging for new ways to minimise those risks.

"We have to outlaw illegal play that causes damage, we have to get people off the field when they have an injury, we have to recognise concussion," he says.

He is part of a team developing a new device which he says can quickly and accurately assess a player for concussion.

"Instead of just asking somebody whether they're okay, and putting [them] through a 10 minute test, which seems fundamentally flawed at the moment, we have got to put this in the field of objectivity."

Concussion and migranes

Dr Rowena Mobbs, a Macquarie University neurologist who researches and treats the effects of concussion in sportspeople, says there is truth to suggestions that women experience concussion symptoms more severely.

"But there is this really important overlap of chronic migraine after trauma, and the term for this is post-traumatic headache," she says.

"When we talk about migraine ... they're the same multitude of symptoms that can occur in concussion.

"So you can be dizzy and clouded in your thinking, lethargic and have double vision. And we know that women are at three times the risk of chronic migraine than men."

A woman on roller skates playing roller derby can be seen flying up the court.

Experts say more research is needed into concussion in sportswomen.(Liam Mitchell Photography )

She suggests there could be an association between chronic migraine syndrome and concussion, a kind of double whammy for women.

"It's really a complex area," Dr Mobbs says.

"It's fairly new to research because, unfortunately, there's been so much preferred research in men in sport, and we're only just now approaching female concussion."

In Australia, the Sports Brain Bank works on diseases such as chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE) and other brain disorders associated with previous concussions or head impacts.

Dr Cohen says there are several Australian sports women who've pledged to donate their brain to the Sports Brain Bank.

"But in general terms, these women won't have been playing the games for as long, and at as high a level," he says.

He says concussion and its long-term consequences "are a numbers game".

"The more impacts to the head you have, the more likely you are to suffer short, medium and long-term consequences. Therefore, the more likely it is to show up as CTE. But we're going to be seeing it in women unfortunately, in the not too distant future."

Invisible injuries

Concussion rules are changing in Australian football codes — the rules that mandated Randall miss the AFLW grand final were brought in earlier this year.

Dr Mobbs welcomes these new rules, but hopes the conversation in elite sport will extend to how concussion is managed at training and in community sport.

In 2019, the Australian Institute of Sport released an updated set of concussion guidelines to improve player safety and address rising concerns in the community around the links between concussion and CTE, which has been linked to dementia and behavioural problems.

Dr Mobbs wants measures like restricting heading the ball in soccer training to be considered.

"We must look after people's brains," she says.

"We can preserve what we love about the sports, they can still be played hard, but it just means that we've got to all get together and think of ways we can preserve brain health for these players."

Sarah McCarthy wishes she'd been stopped from returning to play in the 2016 grand final, and regrets not taking time to immediately rest after the injuries.

She has advice for other people who experience concussion.

"First and foremost, stop everything - stop," she says.

"If you can, stay in a dark room, don't do anything that's too mentally taxing. Don't exercise.

"If I had taken that four to six weeks to rest [and] not have too much mental and emotional stimulation, I think my recovery would have been a lot quicker."

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margoshansons · 3 years ago

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just some thoughts here and there, please feel free to ignore, I just have a lot on my mind rn and I don’t really know where else to put them.

now that school is back in session and I’m working on top of all that, I have so much pent up creative energy but no time or ideas to work with. I want to create, my fingers itch to write and edit but my brain and body are so burnt out I can’t even muster up the power to think of something to do.

On top of that my stories are performing super poorly and I just don’t feel welcome in these stupid communities anymore. (forgive my insults, I’m in a very bad mood rn). My stupid ambition won’t let me be anything but the very best (like no one ever was) and my dumb need for stability and materialistic tendencies refuses to entertain even the idea of cutting back on my hours, on top of just not wanting to confront my manager about the idea for fear of being seen as a burden or an annoyance.

Bottom line, I’m stressed as fuck and have compartmentalized so much of this I truly don’t think I’ve had a moment to just...process it all. I discussed it a little bit in therapy, and I’m truly trying to work through everything, but everything just really came crashing down tonight.

I’ve also been comparing myself and my talents more and more as the year goes on, when I didn’t used to do it before. Idk, I’ve often thought about taking a break, but then I think that no one really seems to give a shit if I leave or come back, so like...what would be the fucking point? I don’t know, I just have a lot in my brain and no one to share it with (at least without bothering people or feeling guilty about unloading it) so I needed to at least write this all out.

Meanwhile, my family is just crashing and burning and I’m the fucking glue that holds it all together so I’m just supposed to be the calm and collected one cause no one wants to deal with the ugly side of anxiety and depression, so I just smile and listen and play family therapist until my head fucking explodes.

God, being a normal, functional, human being is hard.

#Tessa screams into the void #Tessa talks #ignore this im just venting

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years ago

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Survey #455

“but you didn’t have to cut me off / make it like it never happened and that we were nothing”

Are you and the last person you kissed in a relationship or just friends? We're besties! :') Has anyone ever pointed out that your laugh was unusual? No. Would you get a lip piercing? I already have a vertical labret. I've considered getting spiked snakebites (they might be called devil bites?) too, though. With a vertical labret, it looks sick as FUCK. It might be a bit much too close together for me, though, idk. Nose piercing? I want my right nostril re-pierced. What are you currently waiting for? Girt to message me back. I've decided what I want out of our relationship and just want to see him. Do you have feelings for anyone? Hit me pretty hard through a lot of examination of my feelings that yeah, I do. Have you ever run over an animal? Oh my god no, I would be DESTROYED. Have you chewed gum after someone else already has? bro what the fuck When people sneeze do you say ‘bless you’? I do only out of expectation. I don't want someone to think I'm an ass or something for not saying it. When was the last time you were on a bouncy castle? A few years ago for my niece's birthday. She was scared of how loud it was and was very reluctant to get near it, so my fat ass got in there with everyone else to show her it was fine lol. I can't remember if she eventually got in. She loves them now, though. :') Have you ever went on a bouncy castle whilst drunk? No, but thanks for the idea, ha ha. Have you ever entered an art competition? Yes. What is one thing you will never do? Try hardcore drugs. What is one food that you detest? Asparagus. Did you have a rebellious phase growing up? Not really. What religion were you brought up with? Roman Catholic. Are you still that religion? GOD NO. Do you often find yourself questioning your future? That's my full-time job. How many friends do you have on Facebook? 124. What sort of music did you listen to when you were in high school? The same I listen to now. What pet names do you use with your significant other? I'm single rn, but usually, I go for "sweetie/sweetheart," "hunny," "love," "dear," stuff like that. What’s the name of the store you usually get your groceries? Wal-Mart. Have you ever seen a theatre show? Yes. What’s your favourite vegetable? Broccoli. Have you ever missed a flight? Yes. I was SO fuckin upset because it was on Sara's birthday and planned in secret, and I was supposed to wake her up. It still wound up being a big surprise to her when she walked into her room and I was chillin' at her desk, ha ha, but I still wish it coulda gone as originally planned. Do your neighbours have any pets? Have you ever met them? Yes; they have a yappy-ass dog that doesn't shut up. I haven't met them. What color is your bedroom door? White. If you were ever to become famous, would you grow annoyed at fans? This may sound very ungrateful, but I have heard A LOT of celebrities say it: it would get old, being stopped constantly in public for signatures, pictures, etc. Like yes, I still WOULD be grateful, but I'd miss just being off the radar and able to go outside carrying out chores and stuff like a normal person. Have you ever met your favourite band/singer? No. :( Are you embarrassed by any of the songs/singers/bands you like? Nah, not nowadays. Have you ever written a story? Yes, a kinda short one when I was little. Think of the last poem you wrote: What inspired you to write it? The breakup with Jason and the fact we're just strangers again. It was really short, but I like it a lot, honestly. Do you have a chance with the person you like right now? I think so. What’s the weirdest thing you were scared of as a child? A skeleton in my closet, lol. Literally. Are there any embarrassing stories your family tells about you? alkdsjflakjwle yes In your opinion, what is the funniest TV show? That '70s Show. 3rd Rock From the Sun is high up there, too. What is the maximum number of children you’d ever have? HYPOTHETICALLY, two, but I'm pretty damn serious about having none. I just always feel kinda bad for children without a sibling, but three would make me pull my hair out. Have you ever been concerned you had a serious illness? Yes. I overreact to even minor symptoms to ANYTHING. Are you comfortable with who you are? No. Pretty much everything about myself embarrasses me, even if it shouldn't. Would you date someone even if you knew you’d get made fun of for it? Yes? Others' opinions don't affect how I feel about someone. Does popularity matter to you at all? No, outside of trying to be a successful photographer. Would you ever consider homeschooling your children? If they really wanted that and it would benefit them, yes. Who told you about the band/singer you are currently listening to? I discovered them myself. Do you ever read fanfiction? Nah. Would you rather die in a plane crash, ship wreck or fire? Jesus. A plane crash, I guess, because in a lot of cases, it would be an immediate death. What are your top five favourite TV shows? Meerkat Manor, Fullmetal Alchemist (and Brotherhood; shut up, they go together), That '70s Show, Ginga Densetsu Weed, and Deadman Wonderland. What is your favorite superhero movie? Logan. If you died next week, what would be the cause of death? Uhhhh idk... I guess maybe a heart attack? Judging by doctor appointments, my heart is just fine, but the fact still remains that I'm technically obese, so that's always a risk. Have you ever taken a break from Facebook or other social media? Why? Facebook, yes. It was just depressing me. I was playing the comparison game REAL hard. Who is the most talented person you know? I dunno. I know many people talented in a lot of areas. Are you currently platonic friends with anyone you’ve had sex with? No. Where did you and your current interest go on your first date? Bowling. Have you ever experienced two people fighting over you (physically or mentally)? What happened? Jason and Juan pursued me at the same time. They'd known each other in the past, and Juan hated him for "winning" his ex-girlfriend. Then when Jason and I got together, Juan wasn't the happiest for sure. Have your parents ever thought you were gay? What happened? Before I actually came out as bisexual, I don't think so? Are your parents more liberal or conservative? Conservative. Mom is more open, but still conservative. I think. What year are you going into at the beginning of the next academic year? I'm not in school. How far away does your closest family member live? I live with Mom. If you’ve seen both, did you prefer the Disney version or the Tim Burton version of Alice in Wonderland? I actually strongly prefer Tim Burton's. Would you have sex before marriage? Why or why not? Yeah. I just want to be in a long-term, serious, healthy relationship to reach that point and be as safe as possible about it. Are you more liberal or conservative? Liberal, but I do have some conservative beliefs, too. Who is your favorite Harry Potter character? I don't have one, given I never got into that franchise. What’s the worst that could come out of letting gays marry? Not a goddamn thing. What’s the most sexual thing you’ve done? Done "the thing." Name something that you are against. I'll go with an unconventional one that's a problem as of the late: making owning reptiles illegal. Why are you against it? Because reptiles are perfectly capable of being brilliant pets and, most importantly, can tame people's fears of them. I think that it's very important to see the worth and beauty in all animals, and reptiles are one of the most unappreciated families out there. :/ Have you ever played the Tomb Raider games? I played some of either the first or second one. I could never beat it. Old games are hard, man. Do you like it or hate it when your partner is clingy? I absolutely believe that it can get to an extreme that I don't like, but for the most part, I don't mind a clingy partner because hey, I am too. Beatles or Rolling Stones? Stonessss. When was the last time you changed your opinion on somebody? It'd been on my mind for a while, but I *officially* realized that I really do like-like Girt a couple days ago. And since then it's gotten a bit hardcore and all I wanna do is talk to him bc fuck me and how attached to people I get. What was the last thing that made you feel proud and why? Every single time I go to the gym, I feel proud of myself because it REALLY takes a lot out of me. Do you feel uncomfortable when people you hardly know confide in you? Nope. I'm willing to be a shoulder to cry on for like... anyone. If you're hurting, talk to someone. I'll be there as an easy option. What was the last thing to fascinate you? It was... INCREDIBLY disturbing and almost nauseating even for me, but I saw a video of a dead whale explode. It was GRUESOME. Guts just kept coming and coming and coming and :x Is there a certain noise/sound which scares you? Hmmm... I'm sure there is, but what, it's not coming to me. Sudden, loud noises are an obvious answer. Do you have a favourite microorganism? ... No, I can't say I do. Out of the people you know, whose birthday is next? Girt's, actually. It's in October. If you have pet fish do you bother to name them? I did when I actually had them as a kid. Do you keep your eggs in the fridge? Ye. Have you ever owned chickens? No, but that'd be cool. Fresh eggs from a properly cared for chicken taste SO much better. When did you last listen to music? Currently. NOW I'm obsessed with Melodicka Bros & Violet Orlandi's cover of "Somebody That I Used to Know." It's done in a gothic metal style and is amaaaazing.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''somebody that i used to know'' by gotye

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wincore · 4 years ago

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AGREEEE, WORKING OVER THE WEEKEND IS THE WORST esp since im in uni full time and i work 9-5 on the weekends which means... no breaks for me ever.. 🥲

MASSIVE CRUSH ON OIKAWA OMGGG I SUPPORT THIS!!!!! but i am unfortunately much older than 15 and still enamored by 2d men 😔 life’s rough like that HDJWKDJ YES ATSUMU CAUSES PROBLEMS ON PURPOSE.. HES THE WORST!! btw.. ive heard that the oikawa to atsumu stan pipeline is very real... so if u get to s4.. u may develop atsumu brain rot like me 👁_👁

OOO alright run on, extracurricular, vincenzo, true beauty, love alarm, & perfect crime. NOTED!! ive actually been meaning to watch extracurricular for a while now, it looks so interesting!! now that it has the wincore seal of approval i must watch 😤 OMGG SAKURADA DORI I SAW HIM IN ALICE IN BORDERLAND!! super good show but really gore heavy at some points 👁

ahh ok thank u for the reccs, ive been thinking about starting demon slayer too!! shoplifters sounds really interesting :oo crime??? i havent watched a full movie in a while so i will def check it out!! THESE R ALL GOING IN MY NOTES APP.

NEXT YEARRR omg it sounds far away but i know time passes so quickly nowadays so I WILL WISH U LUCK ONCE AGAIN 💛 i hope u update us when the time comes!!

UGHWHHD EVEN THIS SYNOPSIS IS MAKING ME MISS UR WRITING?!? I LOVE THE WAY U WORD IT... “given a choice to pretend, you find that jaehyun is the lesser of the two burdens to bear” AHHHHHHH omg “he’s in a relationship and doesn’t rlly care about the soulmate system” THIS IS ALWAYS SUCH A PAINFUL SCENARIO IN SOULMATE AUS PLSS!!! Wait is the soulmate of yn gonna be an oc/vague character or another member :O EITHER WAY... PAIN! THIS IS GETTING ME SO EXCITED AND U HAVENT EVEN MENTIONED ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT JAEHYUN’S LIKE IN THIS FIC YET

RUNWAY CHARACTER CAMEOOOS YESS I LOVE RUNWAY YN!!!! i actually reread it last night and ugh i was reminded how much i love yns personality... just the process of experiencing all tht self doubt with them!!! so real & makes u root for them :’)

“if jeno plays edward i need him to that apple scene like taemin did” WHHHHHWJDJJWJDBW THIS MADE ME CHOKE ON THE WATER I WAS DRINKING LMFAO

GODDDD THESE TROPE/MEMBER PAIRINGS, HARD AGREE HARD AGREE!!! HAECHAN AND RENJUN ARE E2L 100%!!!! i think bc the ppl in the bff2l category cant convincingly hate yn back LOL

“gets complimented on his lyricism often but like every song’s about you” STOPPPPP HES SO PERFDCT FOR THIS TROPE!!!!!

OMG I SEE EXACTLY WHAT U MEAN ABT SICHENG IN ROYALTY/CHAEBOL AUS... i think like u said it’s because of his poise & the way ppl are generally in awe of him but also bc of his reluctance to open up!! more reserved until he trusts u... funny and kind but sometimes perceived as aloof... those r some prince tendencies! “what are corporate businesses but modern day kingdoms” LMFAOOWJDJ SERIOUSLY THO

“mans really said i will not give you any onscreen idol personality to work with” HDJWJDJWJSJ LITERALLYYYY this is why i have trouble reading jaehyun fics sometimes bc sometimes they can feel “inaccurate” but its mostly just bc there’s no Standard Personality Stereotype to go off of. but a random & uncommon trope i think he’d pair well with is exes to lovers!! Yes im basically just a jaehyun + angst advocate.

“i think most of them would pair well with bff2l??” FACTTTTTTT and no im not just saying this bc its one of my favorite tropes.. heh... i think i told u this before?? but ur like the main reason i started enjoying e2l!!! i didnt like it before bc i love the PINING in bff2l but then i started reading ur works n was like OH SHIT! THERES LOADS OF PINING HERE TOO...

i think yangyang is not bff2l or e2l, he is in his own category which is Annoyer2Lover HDJWKDJ ex: troublemaker, wasted nights

OMGGGG I DID NOT EXPECT ROYALTY AU TO HAVE SUCH A LARGE LEAD IN THE SURVEY??? and cryptids is so low 😔😔 cmon guys, vampires r fun!!!

WE R LITERALLY WRITING ESSAYS TO EACH OTHER RN BUT I LOVE IT 🥺🥺 its a such a nice break to read ur response when im burnt out from studying!!

OMG IM GOING THROUGH #moonwrites AND IM LITERALLY AN IDIOTTTT IVE BEEN OFF TUMBLR FOR SO LONG I DIDNT REALIZE THAT ROMEO ROULETTE HAD A PREVIEW OUT????

“And I get what out of this?” “Me?” IM IN LOVE WITH THIS CHARACTERS PERSONALITY ALREADY LMFAOO

“—and when this whole game you’re playing is over, you’re going to say I rejected you.” ?!?!???? THE WAY JAEHYUN IS A LITTLE SHIT! THEIR PERSONALITIES ARE BOTH SO FUN PLSJWJDJEJ IM MORE EXCITED NOW!!

pls disregard the part in my last ask where i asked abt romeo roulette.... i had no idea all of the information i needed was sitting right in front of me 😔😔

- tata

WHAT 9 TO 5 ON EVERY WEEKEND???? the system has failed you this honestly feels like a villain origin story 😭 when does it get better???

ALSO let me answer the other asks separately for better readability lol we really out here writing essays GOOD THING i have practice writing but like. this is infinitely better to write 🥰

PLSSS SOMETIMES I WILL SEE AN EDIT/TIKTOK OF OIKAWA AND BE LIKE DAMN I REALLY NEED TO CATCH UP I MISS THIS MF also are you daring me to ruin my life for 2d men bc i will do it without hesitation. wait till i watch hq again and get that atsumu brainrot with you he seems annoying enough for me to like ^_^

AND YES PLS I WAS SO ABSORBED IN IT!! extracurricular was the most gripping show i’ve watched in a while like yes enough teen romance give me two unhinged teenagers doing crime 🤩 AND OMG??? THAT’S WHERE WE SAW HIM TOO and although niragi was literally vomit-inducing human trash, sakurada dori is like. a good actor. except i hated coffee&vanilla which starred him it was literally so cringe i couldn’t 😭 i blame the writers for that though. IM EXCITED FOR S2 OF ALICE IN BORDERLAND THO i really like horror (and i can tolerate gore if ive been desensitized enough) and like i read the manga too!!! the games were really interesting (although morbid).

😭😭 MY NOTES APP IS FULL OF RECS FROM FRIENDS ALL OF THEM HATE ME FOR NOT WATCHING THE SHOWS BUT LIKE. i binge 3 or 4 at a time and strike them off and then go 6 months without watching a single tv series hhh.

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I SURE WILL UPDATE !!! it’s so exciting to think about grad school sometimes :33

AHHH IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE IT AND THE PREVIEW TOO SGSDJKDS there’s a few differences in the actual fic i think bc i changed up the language (and i dont remember what else bc i refuse to look at my writing) JAEHYUN RLLY IS A LITTLE SHIT he’ll be like hm yeah im pretty chill :) and then proceed to beat yn at her own game at times. (she wins mostly dw) the fact that i made her soulmate cha eunwoo like girl if i were you i’d crash their relationship 🥱 (jk) but like. jaehyun too is 🤩 despite being dry af

ASDKDSKDS YOU REREAD ALL (ALMOST) 19K WORDS ??? IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE THAT FIC SM AAAAHHH IM FEELING LIKE AN ACTUAL AUTHOR 🥰 i loved runway yn too they were like boss attitude with 20% anxiety.

LOOK JENO BETTER BE PULLING MOVES LIKE THAT TO IMPRESS THE GIRLS 😤 if he hits himself in the forehead with the apple, bonus points bc that was true comedy (as invented by taemin)

AND YES. LIKE I KNOW MARK HATED DONGHYUCK SO MUCH HE WANTED TO LEAVE SM BUT LIKE HE’S TOO NICE WITH EVERYONE ELSE 😭😭😭 i cannot picture him pissed off apart from that summer fight </3

thinking about dejun getting rejected by a girl he wrote a song for. rip brother.

IM GLAD YOU PUT THAT INTO WORDS BC THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT IT IS!!! he’s got all of these regal qualities but he’s still human ykyk so it makes for the most amiable person on earth 😌 i love this characterization of him!!

oof exes to lovers with jaehyun... i had a similar idea a while ago (with theme song sincerity is scary by the 1975) that i discarded bc i don’t think i’m cut out to write that 😭 (YET) so i will keep this is mind. u r so right about jaehyun feeling inaccurate bc it’s like he’s very mild in personality onscreen sometimes?? so him having strong personality traits makes me go 🤔🤔 that man is overreacting. (jkjk but like you get the idea)

WAIT RLLY OMG BC OF ME???? i would never enjoy e2l irl bc irl dudes are 🤢🤢 and if they annoy me i will end them. but in fiction the mutual pining and initial disgust at yourself for liking the other??? helllooo 🤩🤩🤩 especially if it’s in a romcom style <3 bff2l is also better in fiction bc if the relationship doesnt work out irl and the person become uncomfortable with me i will just get annoyed jskshdl

LMAO YOU ARE SO RIGHT ABOUT YANGYANG HE’S JUST THAT�� DUDE skgkhs he feels like someone fun to hang out with but he would annoy you the whole time. also he is cute 🥰

AND EXACTLY!!!! IM HAPPY FOR ROYALTY AUS BUT CMON. LOOK AT THOSE VAMPIRE TEETH. feel like media ruined vampires for people 😔

THIS IS SUCH A NICE BREAK FROM STUDYING HONESTLY!!!! im like working on two semi-large projects AND studying course and out-of-course material simultaneously so my brain is a little fried. thank u for this 😘

#tata 💖#anon #answered

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altcvnningham · 4 years ago

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1, 3, 5, 15, 18 and 20 😳😳😳😳

thank you for the ask!!! (also superior url omg 👁👄👁🤲🏻)

also my answers here are suuuuper long, because i’m a rambling idiot who’s way too involved in my OC’s. so uhhhh sorry in advance,,,,,

1. what radio station(s) do you listen to?

Vana’s a Samurai stan. She wishes she wasn’t. But, y’know, Morro Rock it is. Once upon a time when she was an even angrier teen, though, she’d listen to shit just like Ritual FM.

(My music taste is all over the place, and though blues is technically my fav bc i love old music, i never listen to it in 2077. So I switch between Body Heat, the Dirge, Vexelstrom for like 2 songs, and ofc, Morro Rock. But of all stations, there’s at least one song that i HATE so I can never stick to one for a whole ride sknsksjsjs)

i think i got the names right?? Idk yall i dont have it in front of me ndndndndhjs

3. how did you feel about Johnny that first night in the apartment, and how does it differ from what you feel now after everything?

so i’m gonna cut a read-more here because i decided to just lore dump Vana x Johnny here so uhhhhhh rip also //SPOILERS//

Vana is an extremely, seriously private, guarded person. Before Johnny, Panam, Kerry- Jackie was the only person she’d ever truly let near her, to get to know her. So obviously waking up to someone else living inside her fucking head was one of the worst things that’s ever happened to her. Her past is also something she’s not particularly proud of, so Johnny getting to witness all that is traumatising. Getting Johnny out of her head was priority number one, even if digging the chip out would kill her.

But after getting fucked over by the VBs, and both of them thinking she was gonna die, Johnny takes her to that abandoned hotel in Pacifica- it’s the first time he’s given her even a sliver of kindness, and the first time she’s ever openly expressed her fears to him, even if he could already sense them before. Oaths and promises are something she holds to incredibly high importance, so obviously when Johnny gives her his dog-tags, ‘proof of my promise’, she never, ever lets them go, never takes them off. (she still doesn’t. they keep her grounded. holding them to calm herself has become a reflex, for whatever reason.)

Everything just seemed to slowly change after that. For two people who hate vulnerability, it’s the only thing that helped them actually see each other. As the Relic continues to take over, they both understand each other more, feel each other more- and eventually it becomes hard to discern where Vana ends and Johnny begins. In cliché Johnny x V fashion like yeah duh it goes further,,,, cockwhore!Vana,,,,,, but with that they also start to become extremely possessive and jealous over one another- Johnny immediately on the defensive about whoever comes close to her, Vana selfishly hiding and keeping Johnny’s existence to herself, even if it slows the hunt for a remedy to the chip- to the point of seriously toxic co-dependency. It’s full of volatile ups-and-downs, fights and make-ups, and Vana almost comes to like the fact that she never has to explain nor hide what thoughts and feelings pass through her mind, no matter how dark or vulnerable. She prefers most things to remain unsaid, but values the fact that they both have a clear, transparent understanding of each other regardless.

But there's also... softer moments. When Johnny puts aside his ego for once, he learns to like the quiet that Vana does, brief as it can be sometimes. He'll sort of just... stay around the room, even if just to procrastinate retreating back into her head, because they realise they like each other's silent, wordless company. He'll wake her up from nightmares, hold her neck and kiss her back to sleep, or until the sun comes up, if she can't. It's all tender things they often pretend doesn't even happen, out of pride, I think, but they both know deep down that those are really the best parts.

Comes to a place where she suddenly hits a wall, and realises, I don’t want him to leave.

She’s never the same again after Mikoshi.

(But uhh anyway fuck V I’m horny on main for Keanu so i was here for the whole riiiiiide yeeeeeee)

5. how do your loved ones (LI, found family, etc) feel about you being a merc? or if you’ve given up the life now that everything’s finished, what was their reaction?

Vana grew up in a rich corp family, and after all the shit she’s endured just to appease her father, don’t think anyone could hate corps more than she does (some details of her past here!!) So when Arasaka kicks her out and Jackie finally convinces her to start merc work, it’s amazing how quickly she slips into the role, almost like she was made for it- an anonymous face within the city, free to roam and drift as she wants, relying on herself and herself only.

Vana works quickly and quietly enough (though not at all with clean hands), relying on stealth and netrunning, so she doesn’t cause too much of a noise that’d have her loved ones (rare as they are) all too concerned. Judy isn’t scared Vana’d be caught in gunfire, because when Vana works, her targets rarely know she’s even there. She’s smart, cunning. Panam appreciates that these skills have helped her out, so she can’t complain. River- who is unfortunately more fond of Vana than she is of him, given that she’s not too comfortable at accepting affection- isn’t too happy about the life she leads, but hey, it’s her skills as a merc and as one of NC’s most adept netrunners that he even stood a chance of finding Randy as quick as he did, so he feels indebted to her for that. Kerry thinks it’s fuckin awesome that she gets to do as she wants and provides for herself, bestieeees

Given she isn’t all that close with many people- keeping her distance and all- the only people who seriously worry about her are folks like Vik, Misty, and Mama Welles, especially the latter two, who knew how much Jackie meant to her, and how easily she cracks under the weight of grief. The only thing, really, that concerns everybody around her, is how insatiable her bloodlust becomes, and how much she'd throw away just to try and quell it.

Johnny’s just in it for the ride. Rather she work for herself than a filthy corp, anyway.

After Mikoshi, losing Johnny, making it to the major leagues, she fuckin... just doesn't care anymore. She hates the big glass house that was practically forced onto her (reminds her too much of her stifling corp childhood), she hates that she has 20 cars that clog up her garage and not just her trusty red Yaiba Kusanagi, hates that folks keep giving her all this shiny golden shit that she doesn't want, like any of it's worth a damn. Since then she's hardly in one place- never at home if she can help it, and either wanders aimlessly around the streets and crashes over at Kerry's to sleep through grief. It isn't the merc life she wants to leave, but major leagues turned out to be a glittering pile of dogshit she wants no part in. She only really stays there because Jackie would've wanted it.

(i’m a lazy bitch like i don’t wanna be a merc. i wanna be one of those cute npc’s with the glowy earrings and bunny backpacks and skimpy plastic skirts, who picks up noodles on the way home to go watch watson whore. in my ideal life i am NOT the main character snnsmsnsks)

15. which NPC is your bff?

Kerry. Kerry is Vana’s ride or die. No fucking questions asked. Kerry’s the only person (besides Johnny, i guess) as close to her as Jackie was. He’s really the only person that ever gets her to smile, like really, stupidly, goofily smile, and despite being almost complete opposites, they just understand each other so well. Whenever they need something, they're the first person they'll call. Happens so often that just as Vana sifts through her contacts to find his, Kerry's already calling for her first. They're practically joint at the hip.

They both live loud, fast lives, but also know how to make time for silence and introspection, something they both need to stay grounded. Vana doesn't buy into his zen-wellness-yoga crap, but sure, she tries copying a couple moves while he's doing it on a lazy afternoon, before scoffing how this is fuckin' dumb and retreats back to the couch. Also, as much as she hates being reminded of the wealth that came with her corpo upbringing, she loves using up all his expensive products, and tends to klep a bottle of his shampoo when she runs out. Cute how she thinks he doesn't notice.

After what happened in Mikoshi, she practically lives at Kerry's place, just dozing away miserably as he lounges by the pool, or curl up on the couch to mindlessly watch his old Samurai tapes (he doesn't like it much, but if it helps her through whatever shit she's going through, he's not gonna take that away from her). On better days, when she actually pulls herself out of bed, he teaches her to play guitar, slipping in a couple tricks Johnny taught him. Funnily enough, the whole thing helps him find some closure too.

( me,, I need a girl like Panam in my life to endorse all of my stupid ideas )

18. what’s your dream cyberware (either something that was shown in lore that wasn’t available in game or mental creation of your own)?

I don’t have access to the tabletop lore stuff rn so i’m gonna pull this out my ass jsjsns

Anything that helps Vana become more deadly at stealth and netrunning. The most eddies she’s ever blown are on increasingly powerful cyberdecks, cooling systems, netrunning gear she can comfortably slip on under a jacket and boots- she likes convenience and functionality, but she needs it to be comfortable, too. She’d fucking kill for anything that lets her scale silently up walls and across ceilings, though- like a spider- and anything that lets her get her hands reeeeal bloody, but quietly. Guess that’s just called a knife, though.

(Me?? Fuck uhhh man i just want synth-skin that looks normal but also shimmers all pink n cute. Literally wanna be an edward cullen sparkly lookin mf. Also, i’m sorry but scanning shit w Kiroshi’s are so dope that’s literally all i want?? Idk i’m boring and mantis blades freak me out uhh)

20. is there anyone you’re crushing on that’s unavailable? (yes this is the “what romance option(s) are you foaming at the mouth for” question)

Answered here :)

(And i’ll say it again, PLACIIIIIIIDE,)

#ask #vana #vana lore #i am #SO SORRY #that this is so long #u ask me ab my OCs it's bound to happen #thank u v much for the ask!!#i had a ton of fun!#:D

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jisvnq · 4 years ago

Text

tag games✨

(stealing emmie’s idea *cough*)

so putting some tag games under the cut here <3 thank you for tagging me !! and please, if you want to, please continue doing it because i enjoy doing these quite a lot :3

the order is messed up though lmao sorry

get to know me tag 💕

tagged by ;; @flirtyhyuck

rules ;; tag 10 blogs you want to get to know better

name: zamantha

gender: female

height: somewhere around 5′1″? don’t think i grew much since we last measured lmao

sexuality: good question

jk idrk just yet but here’s something that i feel describes me best rn ?

favorite animal: dogs? foxes? idrk but otherwise, it’d be a dragon

current time:

cats or dogs: dogs

dream job: astronaut like anything that has something to do with music (like performing or production) or science (probably more on chemistry though cause i’m a nerd)

when i made this blog: april [something] 2019

why i made this blog: because i had ideas i wanted to share and make other people happy with these ideas as well

reason for url: my handwriting is crap so my u’s & v’s and g’s & q’s look the same + blog is about jisung so yeah

(and also to kathy, hyuck doing that tongue thing, yes)

5 random facts 💞

tagged by ;; @heart-bleeding-autism-angel, @pinkhyunie (different kind of tag, but same content hhh)

rules ;; write 5 random facts about yourself and tag some mutuals/people you’d like to get to know better !!

i recently just learnt blackpink’s stay on the guitar

i really really wanna learn misfit on the drums but we only have electric drums and my father won’t teach me how to set it up 🤧

i think wayyyy too much

i can somehow destroy anything i can get my hands on (both on purpose sabotage but more often than not, on accident 🤡)

i’m horrible at responses and replying :/

a bunch of tags 💓

just emmie’s hugeass tag that i’ll be answering cause why not

tagged by ;; @honeydh (the whole thing <3), @heart-bleeding-autism-angel (keeping up with mutuals tag)

｡☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆｡

keeping up with mutuals tag 💗

favorite color(s): green

last song: DINOSAUR - AKMU

last movie: Your Name (haven’t actually watched anything else since then 💀💀)

last show completed: Crash Landing on You (this is the only show i managed to “finish” 💀💀💀)

currently reading: The Martian - Andy Weir

currently watching: i don’t really watch any shows

sweet, savory, or spicy: savory (i can’t take too much of any flavor, really)

craving: kwek kwek :(( also boba and maybe like pizza

tea or coffee: coffee

｡☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆｡

5 things tag 💖

5 things you can find in my room:

19472 plushies

fuzzy blankets & fluffy pillows

a bed

a desktop computer

and a mess

(the room is literally just a bed and a computer + i share it with my siblings skhf)

5 random things about me:

i love studying about different languages and cultures of different places

i don’t really like cake 😬 (too-sweet things in general too, like candies)

but i really like those sour gummies though, they pass

i google so much random shit that i know too many things i won’t be able to use in school

i like learning, but i hate school with a burning passion

5 favorite bands:

i saw “bands” and the first thing that popped into my head was fall out boy skjd

day6

tøp

kamikazee

parokya ni edgar lol

5 favorite girl groups/soloists:

blackpink

taylor swift

bol4

hailee steinfeld

moira dela torre

5 favorite boy groups/soloists:

nct

stray kids

ed sheeran

treasure

bruno mars

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15 questions tag 💝

nicknames: zam (irl and here), z (just here), zennie, zatan (help ?!?!?), zsung

zodiac: libra

height: ^^ pocket-sized

last thing i googled: “why do ants carry dead ants” 💀

song stuck in my head: DINOSAUR - AKMU (it just sounds so good 🥺)

number of followers: 1,275 :o

amount of sleep i got: i’m hibernating (like 12 hours? idk when i slept but i just woke up)

lucky number: 18 (lucky & favorite number)

favorite song: yes

favorite instrument: by sound, violin & piano, but to play, it’s got to be the drums skjdfh

dream job: like i said, astronaut something related to either music or science

aesthetic: i’m bad at like art stuff and design help me pls hm idk maybe like rn i’m feeling stuff like stupid poses in polaroid photos, remembering something that happened like years ago with a friend and laughing about it together, playing at a playground at night, sleepovers where no one actually sleeps, late-night roadtrips, camping with friends and stargazing, just like everything nostalgic yk

favorite author: i pick up whatever book and just read tbh so i don’t really have a favorite, per se

favorite animal noise: crickets chirping (idk i just have some good memories tied to this sound it’s weird skfs)

random: as suggested by one of my timestamps, i don’t really like pizza crusts

#tagged <3 #lmao this is really long i'm sorry skjdf

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nortnaibz · 4 years ago

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"Bother My Askbox?" now,, what if I sent you 1-50 🤔 as a treat!! Haha just kidding.. unless. RETALIATION BITCH BOY

JFLKHSAFHDLFJDSKJF that is going to take me a hot minute 2 answer my dear but i will do the ones i haven’t already answered. just for u, gayass.

1. what color are your socks?

don’t have any ^-^ thems my feet

answered 2 <3

3. what is something you regret in the past month?

well there is a lot but not buying halloween candy sooner especially

4. do you believe in love at first sight?

nnnnnnope

5. when was the last time you wrote someone a letter on paper?

i always had to write thank you notes for xmas and birthday gifts as a kid so probably one of those? for an actual written letter it’s been at least a decade

6. how old were you when you first learned how to ride a bike? who taught you?

i......sighs i never learned how to ride a bike bc i went over the handlebars of one when i was like 4 and then never got back on one -_-

7. do you get along with your parents? why or why not?

complicated bc i’m the queer kid next question

8. what’s your favorite season?

fall!!!!!! even though we don’t really have it here

9. do you currently like someone?

well you know the answer to this sir......i’m perhaps a little gay for my girlfriend

10. have you ever used a ouija board?

yes i have on multiple occasions and nothing happened

11. what’s the last song you sang?

prisoner by dance gavin dance listening 2 it on repeat while i rank xd

12. what’s your favorite scent?

rain on pavement!!!!!!!!!!!

13. what’s your favorite urban legend?

uhhhhhhhhh? i don’t think i know any

14. what’s a bad habit you have?

i have many but i’m super clumsy and not very aware of like where i am in relation to other things so i run into shit a lot

15. what’s a strange habit you have?

i wrap my earbud cord around my neck so it isn’t dangling and in my way when i walk places

16. what’s the first instrument you learned to play?

if you wanna be technical i learned to play flute for a very brief period in 4th grade but i hated it. so guitar!

17. how would you describe your type?

uhhhhhhh good question people who are nice to me <3 and most men

18. would you rather stay in or go out?

for the most part stay in but i usually hit a point after awhile of being home too long where i Need to leave the house lol

19. what was the last thing you said to your mom?

bye after i called her yesterday lol

20. do you want to get married someday?

not traditionally but yes

answered 21 and 22!

23. what’s an embarrassing thing that happened this week?

i had to answer a phone call at work abt the pet section which i know nothing about and the lady was clearly kinda annoyed and when i told her we didn’t sell kennels in the store (and that yes, i had checked) she said thank you and i. didn’t say anything else. i like forgot to speak and she just hung up and i felt so stupid for it ksdfjksdfhjk

24. when was the last time you went sledding?

it’s been at least a decade iirc

25. have you ever/do you like someone you know you can never be with?

yes........ *picture of norton campbell*

26. do people often mispronounce your name?

nope

27. would you like to live in another country?

absolutely! when this country inevitably falls apart in the wake of the 2020 election i will be contacting my stoner friends in canada and moving up there at my earliest convenience <3

28. do you like to watch ghost hunting shows?

i never have but i would probably find them entertaining

29. who was the last person you said i love you to?

kei my friend kei my best friend kei <3 before that either my mom or my girlfriend lol

30. what’s something you’d like to be better at?

playing guitar!!!!! i wanna get back into it so bad i just don’t know where my picks are rn

31. have you ever stayed up to talk to someone who was sad?

oh sure i have it’s been awhile though

32. what was the last thing you cooked?

scrambled eggs the other day ^-^

33. do you think you would make a good parent?

absolutely not and i will never have kids unless i decide to adopt after getting help 4 my issues and assuring that i could actually be responsible for another human life

34. do you have trouble sleeping at night?

nah i have issues w waking up in the middle of the night sometimes but other than that i’m good

35. where is your best friend right now?

i don’t have one best friend one is at work one is in his home i presume and the other is at college <3

36. how long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

depends but usually like 20 mins? i don’t do makeup or anything so i can be ready in ten if i need to be

37. how late do you usually stay up at night?

until 10 or 11 lately!

38. when was the last time you cried and why?

uh good question i have shit memory but a few days ago over life stress probably lol

39. have you ever won a contest?

yes i won a costume contest in my elementary school when i was v little and i sort of won a contest to get my poetry published in my uh. sophomore year....summer between sophomore and junior year

40. can you draw well?

i can draw. the well is subjective ^_^

41. would you ever date someone you met on tumblr/the internet?

me n my girlfriend are long distance but i did not meet her on tumblr i think if i ever date someone on tumblr you all should require an essay from me on why it is an okay thing to do. i love my mutuals but some of the people on here...well you know

42. what was the last thing you ate?

snickers!

43. do you think you’re/you’d make a good boyfriend/girlfriend?

ehhhhh i mean i’m certainly better than i used to be but tldr no. but i have issues so take that as you will

44. have you ever had a near death experience?

as in i physically came close to death and survived, no. but i was in a car crash a few yrs back that if anything had happened differently it could’ve killed us

45. what do you think people think of you?

idk i have a hard time reading intention and like. opinions of me? i think everyone puts up with my shit and wishes they didn’t have to lol

46. what is your middle name and do you like it?

my middle name is rowan and i love it cause i picked it myself i have no other middle names and i never have <3

47. are you close with either of your parents?

nnnnnnot really!

48. do you like yourself?

well i am the sexiest motherfucker alive but also i hate myself. i’m incredible and deserve better but also am horrible and deserve nothing. i’m the best and the worst at the same time <3

49. state five facts about your appearance

uhhhh my hair’s red, i’m short as fuck, i have blue eyes, i always wear hairties around my wrists, and i uhhhhh like wearing long sleeves. does that count??

50. state 5 facts about your personality

hm well i have no idea who i am as a person but? i’m creative, i like video games, i’m a pessimist, i spend a lot of time thinking/daydreaming, and i’m gay! the end <3 <3 <3

#asks #kei tag #food mention #parent mention #q slur #ummmm if i missed anything let me know n ill tag it!#long post

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