#i really shouldn’t have done that i should know how important these exams are

[mel-core]

wow tears sure do flow quick when ur hydrated

[marvelouslizzie]

sooo, i read your fic "like someone i know" and it was absolutely hot AND amazing. i am obsessed with miscommunication of how they thought they hated/were against each other but not. 😭

if you do take requests, could you write a drabble or something of them finally dating and bucky still teasing the reader but obviously in love now? JBJDJSHS maybe make the entire class confused bc they're aware of their rivalry. i just LOVEEE the fluff after enemies/rivals to lovers plots. 🥹

if you don't take requests, it's okay!!! your fic was amazing and now i shall read more of your work to my heart's content!!!

Thank you so much for the kind words ❤️

Oh, I absolutely love this! I tried to write a cute drabble and I hope this works for you.

summary: Set after Like Someone I Know. You and your former academic rival, Bucky, begin a secret romantic relationship. What happens when you two have another exam?

pairing: College!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

warnings: None actually. Pure bickering and a bit of fluff + no mention of y/n.

word count: 842

All work is mine, please do not repost or translate without my permission.

Another day, another test. You feel stressed by the number of lessons you had to study for this one. There were so many things, even though you went through all of them, you feel like you remember nothing. Nothing at all.

You open your bag and reach for your notes while your back rests against the cold wall. Maybe you will feel confident enough if you go through them one more time. Refreshing your memory does not hurt, right?

You start to read and repeat the most important info in your mind, trying to remember where and how you wrote them so you can use them during the exam, but it’s hard to concentrate. Especially, when Bucky’s voice is booming through the hallway. His laugh is so loud, and it annoys you because he isn’t laughing like that because of you. He’s just messing around with Steve, Sam, and Natasha, as usual. You are pretty sure Natasha is the one that made him laugh this loudly, and jealousy takes over you. 

“For the love of god, just stop talking for a sec! Some of us are trying to study here.” 

No one bats an eye. They are so used to you two bickering before and after exams, but Bucky immediately turns to you. You see the mischievous spark in his eyes. He’s so amused by the comment.

“Do you mean yourself, princess? Because I don’t see anyone else besides you studying right now.”

You make a sour face when you hear him calling you princess. That’s new. He usually calls you doll.

“Does it matter?”

“Matters to me.”

“Fine. I’m trying to study. Shut your mouth, kay? Bye.”

You try to turn back to your notes, but no, Bucky is not done bickering with you. Of course, he isn’t.

“Don’t worry, you will get a good grade. You always do.” It could’ve been such a sweet encouragement if his tone had been different. It just feels like he’s patronizing you.

“So what? I should stop studying?” 

“Yeah. Give yourself a break, doll.” He stops for a second, then dramatically adds. “Live a little.”

“Studying first, living later.” That kinda sounds like a promise, but no one but Bucky gets that.

You think you can finally read again, but Sam doesn’t let go of the conversation for some reason. He always likes to interject.

“Are you worried Bucky will get the best grade?” 

“Oh, come on, Sam!” Steve sounds tired already.

“I would like to see him try.” After years of being rivals, your answer comes automatically. You forget there’s no need for this anymore.

“I got the best score last time, remember?” Luckily he doesn’t sound offended. Maybe he just missed your usual bickering.

“And I will make sure that doesn’t happen again.” You give him a fake smile. You really want to get the best score, even if that means beating your boyfriend.

“You always say that, but…” Suddenly he stops talking, and you wanna know how that sentence ends.

“But what?” 

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Come on!” You challenge him. He shouldn’t stop himself from voicing his thoughts just because you started to date a while ago. Your rivalry is still there. He should be free to say whatever he wants. “Say it.”

“Maybe later.” He resists.

"Come on, Barnes! Since when are you afraid to speak your mind?" Your taunting works like a charm.

“You always say that, but I never saw you upset because I beat you.”

You can’t help but smile. If someone is gonna get the better grade, it has to be Bucky. Any other option is simply not acceptable.

You feel the stares of Steve, Sam, and Natasha on you. They didn’t expect this turn of events. They have been holding their breaths to see your reaction. Are you gonna get mad? Snap back at him? Shove his flirtatious comment up his ass?

“If it's not me, then it has to be you, right?” You watch Bucky’s smile grow while others mumble with confusion.

“If not my girl, then who else?”

Oh, he really went there. He didn’t miss the opportunity to claim you, and even though you wanted to do that very differently, you can’t help but feel giddy about it.

You don’t say anything at first, slowly walking towards him. You stop right in front of him, staring into his pretty blue eyes. He doesn’t know what to expect, so you can see how puzzled he is. You stand on your tiptoes and gently place a kiss on his cheek. 

“Good luck, baby,” you whisper into his ear, then you just turn on your heels, like nothing happened. “See you after the exam.” You don’t look back, but you hear others talk.

“What the fuck just happened?” 

“Did she just-” 

“I told you they would eventually fuck, Rogers! Pay up!” 

“Language, Sam! We don’t even know…”

“Oh, they definitely did.” Natasha sounds rather amused.

“Fine!”

“Oh, come on! You betted on us?” Bucky’s charming voice is the last thing you hear before entering the classroom.

[curbie]

Studying a week in advance for an exam: how do you do it?

If you’ve searched for tips and tricks on how to do well on your exams, you’ve likely heard this tip before. It’s a really great piece of advice, and is the golden rule in study strategies, yet making the most out of this requires some good time management. So a question remains: where do you start?

Step One: Make Your Flashcards

The first portion of your time should be dedicated to making flashcards. It’s important to emphasize that you SHOULDN’T be using flashcards OTHER PEOPLE made. Making flashcards for yourself counts as an active form of studying (unless you are copying and pasting random stuff from your textbook with no thought put into it). For me, exams usually cover, like, 4-6 chapters, so what I do is make 1-2 sets of flashcards a day (depending on how many chapters the exam is going over). This should take up about 4-6 days of the week you have to study before the exam, but realistically you should focus on getting all of your flashcards done at the 4 or 5 day mark.

If you know in advance that your class is rigorous and dedicates a lot of time to making flashcards, I suggest slowly making these flashcards as the semester goes on, not in the week before an exam. Getting a head start here would be extremely beneficial, but only necessary for rigorous classes.

Step Two: Make Detailed Notes From Scratch (Optional)

This step is only recommended if you finish your flashcards pretty early. For example, for my cognitive processes class, I started making flashcards a week before the original exam date. However, since we were behind, the professor moved the exam date 2 days later. This meant that I had some left over time that could be used going into more depth on the course material.

By making your own detailed notes from scratch, I want you to make them as if you were making a youtube video teaching someone else about the topic. Imagine yourself making a script for this video, you’ll then see yourself describing pretty complex topics in simple ways for your invisible viewer. Also, by doing this, you could find things you are specifically confused about for topics you once thought you mastered. I really like this method, but it’s very time consuming. Use this method in moderation, because knowing and remembering the basics should be more of a priority than going into complete depth.

Step 3: Study the Flashcards (duh)

Studying the flashcards should be the last step. Start studying them the day before the test once you have gone over the material multiple times. Use all the time before studying the flashcards to make sure you truly know the concepts you need to know. If needed, simplify definitions using ChatGPT or something. How you study is personal to yourself, but make sure it’s something that’s worked in the past before.

Conclusion

That’s… about it! This is how I personally structure the week before an exam, which means that you may change, add, or remove certain steps to better fit your current situation. It’s completely normal. However, this blueprint has helped me do great on exams, and hopefully it will help you as well!

[shxtodxroki]

𝙷𝚢𝚙𝚘𝚌𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚎

Send me the name of your favorite character and I’ll write a drabble for them! :)

“Tenya, you really should set the books aside and lay down for the night. It’s past 11, and you’re always telling me how important proper rest is.” You gently spoke to the visibly exhausted man in front of you, watching his shoulders sag in an uncharacteristic mix of exhaustion and stress as he turned to face you.

“I know, I’m being quite the hypocrite right now. But I need to study for tomorrow’s exam.” He responded, pinching the bridge of his nose as you slowly made your way over to where he sat at his desk. “Usually I understand our course materials so easily, but I haven’t had the time to study as much recently with all that’s been happening with these wretched villains, so I don’t understand the material nearly as well as I typically do.”

Your hands gently rested on the boy’s shoulders as you finally reached him, tenderly massaging his shoulders in an attempt to ease his stressed mind. You used one hand to reach across his desk and slowly push the book he was using to study closed, a sigh of resignation leaving Tenya’s mouth as he gave in to your pleas to relax and turned around, nearly collapsing in your arms as you hugged one another tightly.

“Tenya, you’ll do amazing on this test. You always do, and you’ve been studying the material for hours. I have faith in you.” You reassured your companion, rubbing your fingers along his back and tracing light shapes into his skin to soothe him. He was quickly giving in to the sense of relaxation and comfort you brought him, following you without a word when you pulled back just enough to lead him by his hand to his bed.

“You really shouldn’t be in here, you know.” The boy spoke as he laid down in his bed, you immediately making your way in beside him. Despite his words, you knew he’d never ask you to leave at this hour. “Aizawa doesn’t like it when we don’t stay in our own dorms at night.” Nonetheless, Tenya found himself curling his head into your chest, eyes drifting shut as you ran your hands through his hair.

“What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him, at least every once in a while.” You retorted, though your comment had no bite as you watched the boy beside you quickly drift off. You swiftly pulled his glasses off of his face to protect them from getting crushed between the two of you, setting them down on his nightstand and turning out the lamp that had been the room’s sole source of light at this late hour before allowing yourself to succumb to your own sleepiness, wrapping your arms around Tenya’s head gently as the two of you fell into slumber together. 

Request - @lemonadae-caekie said: I know I already sent a Matchup, but I saw that you where looking for ask drabbles so how about me and my favorite character Iida Tenya?

A/N: First drabble done! :D I haven’t gotten a chance to write for Iida yet so I was really glad to see this request hehe, it was a lot of fun! I’ve had the energy to put out more writing lately (probably because I’m finally catching up on the show, I’m about halfway through what we have of season 6 as of now) so I hope you guys are enjoying what I’ve been putting out, feel free to send in a request if you have any and thanks for reading! :]

Taglist: @pasteldaze @lady-juliette

If you’d like to be added to any of my taglists, you can fill out this form here! Thank you for your support <3

[prettyboykatsuki]

Hii plz just ignore this if you’re uncomfortable or reply to it if you'd like to reply I really would appreciate it but I just need to get some stuff out of my chest

I feel so so bad I just cant see whats the point in my life anymore I feel as if Im just consuming and not giving anything in return I feel useless I dont know how to take a joke or how to make one I dont know how to express my feelings and emotions properly and people keep getting the wrong ideas and Im tired of explaining anything to anyone and I feel as if all of my friends aren’t really there like Im just a passing person on their life I keep losing people and I keep leaving people afraid of them leaving me sometimes and I dont get what the hell is wrong with me sometimes I wish I was never born or if I were someone else but then again I wish I had the power to keep moving and make my life better but I cant even do that I study day and night and I dont get the grade that I want while some people I knew spends their whole life on social media and they are getting full grades literally I feel like Im useless in every aspect of life and I know I shouldn’t be complaining and there are people who have it worse but I really needed to get that out of my chest and I can’t trust anyone of the people I know to tell them all of this also Im going through exams and shit so I just feel really pressured and all

Anyway thank you if you wasted your time reading this or not it doesn’t matter but I really enjoy your writings as well they make me feel alive so thank you for existing🩵

hello!

i thought for a long time today on how to reply to this. or if i should. get asks like this that are triggering can be very tricky to navigate, because on one had it is hard for me. and on the other, i care and have sympathy for you. and i think sometimes, it is easier to reach out to stranger about how you feel than people you love. so i would never blame you for that, or want to make you feel worse.

mostly, i want to say i am unqualified to help you completely. because im just a person who's live a vague concept of a life. take my words with a grain of salt.

i think the most important thing for you to remember is that everything you are experiencing is temporary. and i dont say that to dismiss you, but because i think it worth examining everything in your life and thinking that when it gets to be too much. you are worrying about so much at once, but you'll disillusion yourself in that process.

suffering, pain, excitement, joy. these are all very temporary things to feel, even when they seem like they'll go on forever. they are big, abstract concepts that will torment you near relentless if you let them. the only thing that you have with you concretely, is what you are able to do right now.

i wont tell you that life will immediately get better because to make a life that doesn't make you suffer takes so much time. it is so much work to build a good life and it is constant work - but never impossible. but i think it will quell the pain a little to take a deep breath and slow down to process what you're experiencing, which is a big brush of hopelessness that is so encompassing.

everything feels hopeless because you trying to tackle everything all at once. to me, it doesn't sound like you want to die. it sounds like you want it to be easier. it sounds like you want to burden the lessen, which ultimately means you desire a life. and you sound like you're trying very hard to do that all while worrying about everything else at the same time.

i dont know if i have any advice for you. any good advice, but if i could urge you do anything - it would be to take a deep breath and remember it will pass. it always does. and after that, sort your problems out one by one. and once you've done it, pick the thing that is most urgent that you can change, and start to work towards it. do it slowly and try to keep everything else out of your mind.

if you fail, forgive yourself. you have to forgive yourself. sometimes, the only thing you are able to do is live. or try to live. that doesn't make you useless. no human beings worth is measured by what they can and cannot do. you wouldn't love someone based on what they do but who they are.

and maybe you don't like who you are. maybe your friends aren't the right fit. maybe it will be lonely for a while. you can change it. you can find something new or maybe it will teach you to like your own company. it will pass and you will come out of the other side. but the only way to change those things is to try, and sometimes fail, and to forgive yourself after that and then try more. the world is not ending you just have to take it one day at a time.

it will be fine because everything passes unwillingly. and eventually this will just be another bad day. you're not useless. give yourself some grace for trying. and i hope it gets easier.

[saras-devotionals]

Quiet Time 3/18

What am I feeling today?

Just so tired and a little stressed out. I have an exam today but I feel pretty decent about it, been praying over it and we’ll see what happens. Also, I’m just desperate to get back into the groove of things, get back to my routine.

Bible Plan: Spiritual Wilderness

Back in the days when I was in school, every time the teacher gave us a test, there was silence. Before the test, the teacher would teach but during the test the teacher was silent. The teacher’s silence didn’t mean that the teacher was absent - I was taking a test. I was tempted to raise my hand and ask about a question that was on the test, but I knew the teacher wouldn’t give me any answers. Why? Because I was the one taking the test. When we are not being tested, we can ask any question and get an answer, but during the test, there is silence from the teacher.

Spiritual dryness usually is accompanied by this sort of silence from God. When God is silent in your life, that might mean you’re taking a test.

God’s silence is not God’s absence. It means that we are being tested. One of the things we had to do in school whenever we took a test was to remember what the teacher had taught us before the test. Remembering is the same principle at work in a spiritual wilderness. So often during our dry times, we tend to remember the things we should forget and forget the things we should remember.

Like students, we have to remember what God has said and done to get us through this test. In our minds we must build memorials to His miracles; but instead, some of us build monuments to our mistakes. That’s why we are flunking our test in the wilderness.

Great faith in dry times is really found in having a good memory of God’s past faithfulness and God’s promises. David overcame Goliath by remembering God’s faithfulness when he encountered the bear and the lion. Jesus overcame the devil in the wilderness by quoting the Scriptures that He remembered.

I really love this analogy, I feel that it perfectly applies and it also feels on point with the exam I’m about to take! But also, I know there are times when I can go back and thing and focus on my mistakes and what I did wrong that could’ve led me to a specific moment but why should I? One we’re told not to dwell on the past but also it’ll just hurt me more. Instead, it’s great to think about how God has been faithful to us and all the ways He has provided in the past and keep the faith that as we go through this spiritual desert, He’ll be there on the other side with open arms!

1 Chronicles 16:8-12 NIV

“Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done. Sing to him, sing praise to him; tell of all his wonderful acts. Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice. Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always. Remember the wonders he has done, his miracles, and the judgments he pronounced,”

We should always look to Him with praise in our eyes and on our tongues. I mean, He’s just absolutely incredible! Why shouldn’t we praise Him? And further, this continues in saying to remember all the miracles He has done. I think it’s always important to remember that God doesn’t owe us anything. Nothing at all. He’s in no way required to bless us. But He does anyways. Even just being alive shows His grace and mercy for us and I think that’s a beautiful thing!

2 Chronicles 32:31 NIV

“But when envoys were sent by the rulers of Babylon to ask him about the miraculous sign that had occurred in the land, God left him to test him and to know everything that was in his heart.”

I don’t really know the context for this because I haven’t taken much time to study out the Old Testament, but here we can see an example of how God tests us. Here’s the thing, God of course already knows what’s in our hearts because He knows everything. The reason He tests us is so that we may know what’s in our hearts because I think a lot of people are unaware of what their true nature actually is.

[saffyspirals]

wassup!!hope u r doing fine:))? could u write headcanons or whatever u find more suitable of toman guys(mikey,draken,baji, mitsuya..) where their s/o accidentally says "i hate you" in an argument xxthank you (sorry for any bad english)

𝚜𝚊𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚖 𝚒𝚗 𝚊 𝚏𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝

; with: mikey, draken, mitsuya, baji and hanma.

; warnings: VERY dramatic (i’ve never been in a relationship, but i’m sure fights don’t escalate this quickly, right?)

; author’s note: i added hanma because something came to mind for him too!

𝚖𝚒𝚔𝚎𝚢

you’ve got an important exam coming up, that you really need to do well on.

you haven’t done so great on previous tests, and your parents have threatened to take you out of your extracurricular activities if you fail this time round too.

because you’re spending so much time studying, you haven’t been paying much attention to your boyfriend, mikey.

he misses being around you, so he drops by your house unannounced, in the hopes that you’ll set aside some time for him.

you greet him, and shoot him a friendly smile when he comes in, but that’s about it. mikey is disappointed, but somewhat understands.

he flops down onto your bed, and dozes off.

about an hour and a half later, mikey wakes up to the sound of a frustrated groan, as well as the clattering of a pen that has been dropped.

it’s easy for mikey to see that you’re tired, and yet, after heaving a heavy sigh, you pick up your pen, and begin working again.

“take a break,” he suggests, crawling out from under the covers. he walks over to where you’re sat (at your desk), touching your shoulder when he’s close enough. “come cuddle for a bit.”

“no, mikey.” you shrug his hand off, and continue furiously scribbling down the answers to the questions written in your textbook. “i don’t have time for that.”

“i might not be a studying expert, but i’m sure nothing is going to sink in if you’re overworking yourself.”

“listen, i just need to finish these,” you insist. “and there’s a few pages in my other text book that i need to go over—”

“that’ll take all night!”

“and so what?!” you exclaim, dropping your pen once again to throw your hands up. “dude, you have been nothing but an irritant since you got here. don’t you want me to pass?!” you stand up to face him.

mikey looks puzzled for a second, before his expression evolves into an annoyed one.

“of course i do. why would you even ask that? all i’m saying is you should take a break. you’re wasting time trying to work tired!”

“no, you just want me to cuddle.” you point an accusing finger at him. “you’re being selfish!”

in the back of his mind, mikey knows that you’re only saying these things because you’re stressed, and frustrated. but the forefront of his mind — the more dominant part — tells him to fight back.

“selfish? you think i’m being selfish? and what about you, huh? making this all about you. and so what, if i just want to cuddle, y/n?! you’re my girlfriend for crying out loud, and you haven’t been acting like it at all!”

“if i haven’t been acting like one, maybe i shouldn’t even be your girlfriend!”

“if that’s what you want!”

it’s said in the heat of the moment; a few more moments are needed for both of you to realise the weight your words carry. you break the heavy silence first, opting to deal the final, final blow first.

“okay. whatever. god, i-i hate you, mikey. just get out of my room.”

you turn away from him, not wanting him to see that you’re becoming all teary.

mikey doesn’t move for a second, contemplating how he can even fix the mess you’ve both made.

he swallows, before stepping forward, and wrapping his arms around your middle. his head comes to rest on your shoulder. it stiffens when you realise it’s slowly becoming wet.

“you mean that?” his voice still remains even. “hmm?”

“no. no, of course i don’t!” you sniff, putting your hands on top of his arms. “i don’t want to break up, and i don’t hate you. not even a little.”

mikey perks up a little; he lifts his head.

“i love you.” you continue. “i’m an idiot, and i don’t want you to leave me.”

“you are an idiot,” he agrees, to which you roll your eyes at. “but i don’t want to leave you either.”

𝚍𝚛𝚊𝚔𝚎𝚗

“will you please stop for a sec?”

“why? so you can explain in detail how stupid you are? no thanks, i already know!”

you’re furious. (if that hadn’t been made clear already)

a few minutes ago, you’d been on your way to see draken at his part time job. it was nearing the time he was supposed to be allowed to go out for lunch break. you, having nothing to do, figured you’d spend the time with him.

you’d pushed the store’s door open, pretty eyes twinkling with excitement, at the thought of draken’s smiling face.

the excitement doesn’t last long, at all.

you don’t even get the chance to utter out a greeting, before your eyes are ‘blessed’ with a sight you thought you’d never see.

“i didn’t know she was going to do that, okay?” draken continues, picking up his pace in an attempt to catch up with you.

eventually, he does, and when he is side by side with you, he takes your wrist, and pulls the both of you to a stop.

“it wasn’t obvious to you that she was trying to kiss you?” it’d only been a kiss on the cheek, but still, that was more than enough reason for you to be pissed.

draken looks at you, then around him, at people walking past. the two of you are drawing too much attention.

“can we not do this in the street? let’s go back to the store.”

“the scene of the crime? lovely.” he chooses to ignore your sarcasm, and walk you back to his place of work. draken nods at his boss as he passes him. he takes you into the back.

“y/n, i swear. i’ve never met the girl in my life. it would make no sense for me to think that she’s going to kiss me. right?”

he tries to reason, but really, it goes in one ear and out the other. all that you really gather from this conversation is that he can’t own up to his mistakes.

“i’m sorry, alright? all i can ask for is your forgiveness. i promise it was a mistake.”

“you’re such a liar!” you hiss, shaking your head at him. “and i hate you for it.”

following your confession, is a tense silence. draken is taken aback by your choice of words, and so are you.

“you’re gonna let a stranger do this to us, huh?” he questions, dark eyes boring into yours.

you swallow, unable to come up with an answer. all you can see is red.

“for crying out loud y/n, i love you.” he holds your shoulders. “i only love you. why’s that so hard to believe?”

“i need you, not anybody else. i don’t give a fuck about others.”

at his own confession, you find the red slipping away. you practically dissolve into a puddle of tears. your boyfriend holds you as you cry, and apologise.

“please, trust me from now on.”

𝚖𝚒𝚝𝚜𝚞𝚢𝚊

you wake up earlier than usual on the morning of your birthday, excited for the events that are supposed to be taking place.

you’ve never had a boyfriend for your birthday before, and since mitsuya is literally the sweetest ever, you’re sure he’s got things planned out.

when you have a look at your phone, there are several missed calls and texts from friends, and family who want to wish you a happy birthday, but there isn’t any from mitsuya.

you shrug it off as no big deal, figuring he’s still asleep or something. it’s only a little after eight, so it’s understandable.

you go downstairs to find your parents already waiting for you. by the time they’re done smothering you with affection, singing you happy birthday, and making you eat their ‘special breakfast’, it’s after nine.

you take time to respond to all the messages you’ve received, and call back those who have called. still, there is nothing from mitsuya.

so you decide to call him. you do that twice, but it rings and rings before going to voicemail. you continue to brush it off as no big deal (although, it’s getting harder and harder to do).

after opening gifts from your parents, you head upstairs to change, before leaving the house. if he won’t answer, how about you just drop by and see him?

he lives relatively close by, so it’s no problem on your part.

you ring the doorbell, and stand back, patiently waiting for somebody to come to the door.

mitsuya comes out, about a minute later.

“y/n?” he looks genuinely surprised to see you. “what are — what are you doing here?”

“just wanted to stop by,” you admit. “what, i’m not allowed to see my boyfriend when i want?”

“don’t be silly, ‘course you are. just i’m…sorta busy right now.”

“…doing what?”

“ah, a couple of chores, you get it.”

“i can help!” you suggest, smiling at him. “it’ll get done faster that way, then we can hang out.”

mitsuya stays stood in front of the door, not stepping aside to let you through. your eyebrows knit together, confused.

“is something wrong? you’re acting weird.”

“babe, i’m just really busy right now. i really don’t want to ask, but can you go home? i promise i’ll call you later.”

“you’re so busy, that you can’t even spare an hour or something, to hang out with your girlfriend on her birthday?!”

he looks taken aback for a moment.

“what?” you huff, slowly getting more annoyed. “you didn’t know it was my birthday?”

mitsuya takes a deep breath.

“y/n. i have been so swamped with—”

“oh my god!” you interrupt. “you forgot your girlfriend’s birthday!” mitsuya tries to say something again, but the look you give him stops him in his tracks.

“you are such an asshole, mitsuya! i thought you cared about me!”

“of course i do love. listen, the truth is—”

“don’t fucking call me that, asshole! i hate you!”

you turn and fly down mitsuya’s driveway and back onto the street so fast that mitsuya can barely react. he takes off after you after a bit, calling for his sisters to shut the front door.

“y/n! y/n! shit, y/n wait!” he touches your arm and you stop. mitsuya actually looks hurt, which is ridiculous. he’s the one who forgot your birthday!

“go awa—” mitsuya cups your cheeks, and brings his lips to yours. for a second — just for a second, you melt. his mouth feels good against yours; right.

“stop it.” you build your walls back up.

mitsuya brings them down again with another kiss.

“let me talk, okay?” he pleads. “i didn’t forget your birthday, y/n. inside, my sisters and i were in the middle of decorating the house for a little party i was going to have for you. i ignored your calls on purpose, hoping you’d go hang out with some friends or something. i would’ve called you back after the girls and i were done.”

you blink, unshed tears disappearing with it. “seriously?” mitsuya nods, tiny smile on his face. “well…crap! guess i’m the asshole then.”

“you aren’t.”

“i totally am.” you shake your head. “im sorry i called you one. and im sorry i said i hate you. and i’m sorry i accused you of forgetting my birthday.”

“i know.” you lean into his hand when he strokes your cheek. “no more surprise parties — noted.”

“but uh. how about you come back with me, and we’ll all decorate the house together?”

b a j i

he’s been in a foul mood the whole day and, regardless of what you tell him, it seems to only get worse.

this morning, out of nowhere, a close friend of yours confessed that he’s been crushing on you for a while now. since you’re with baji, he wasn’t expecting the two of you to get together or anything, but he just had to get it off of his chest.

but it isn’t the confession itself that baji is angry about. girls have confessed to him too, despite knowing that he’s taken. what’s bugging him is how you responded.

“he’s my friend, keisuke! and he has been for years! did you want me to tell him to never talk to me again or something? i’m not throwing away years of friendship over stupid feelings.”

“you told him that nothing would change. but how won’t things be different? he’s fucking in love with you!”

he sounds unreasonable to you, and honestly you’re getting tired of trying to comfort him, or nurse his ego, or whatever the hell he wants from you.

“you can’t tell me not to be friends with him. i know what i’m doing, and he’s not going to make a move!”

“i know i can’t tell you that. but you know that you shouldn’t.”

“he’s my friend. i’m not letting him go.”

for the first time since this argument ensued, baji’s eyes meet yours. you almost feel like cowering under his intense gaze. he’s never, ever looked at you that way before.

“and why not?” he sneers. “you like his attention, huh? someone else payin’ attention to you. does that make you happy?”

the classroom door sliding open seems to startle you both. a student enters, mumbling an apology when they feel the tension in the room.

baji tuts, before grabbing his bag and storming out. you apologise to the student for the awkwardness, before picking up your own belongings and following after him.

by the time you get out, baji is already near the end of the corridor.

“keisuke!” you shout, not minding how loud your voice is since nobody else is around. “you’re really pissing me off!”

“oh? and what do you think you’re doing to me?”

you’ve got to run to catch up with him. “why are you so concerned about us staying friends? do you think i’ll end up running off with him, and leaving you?”

he doesn’t say anything in response to that.

“oh. so you don’t trust me?” his jaw clenches. he doesn’t tell you that you’re wrong, like you expect him to.

you grab baji’s arm, and force him to stop walking. “why are you dating me then, since i’m so untrustworthy?”

“…”

“keisuke.”

he huffs and avoids your eyes, despite your attempts to get him to look at you. your brows furrow, and you take your hand away from him.

“you’re so..! i really, really hate stupid jealous guys like—”

—you, you were meant to say. but the final word died in your throat, when baji covered your mouth with his hand.

he looks hurt. you’re sure you do too.

baji holds you as you cry; he swallows the lump in his own throat, willing himself to be strong for now.

𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚖𝚊

hanma and you have been together for a bit; just shy of four months. you’re at the point now where you are familiar with each other’s likes and dislikes.

while that’s a good thing for any relationship, what isn’t so great, is the fact that hanma doesn’t seem to care about what you don’t like.

example number one: flirting.

it’s been an issue since the beginning of your relationship. hanma, used to floating around from girl to girl, seems to find it hard to adjust to being in a committed relationship, despite being with you for three months.

he finds flirting with other girls harmless. quite frankly, you would too, if it wasn’t for the fact that he was so damn good at it!

hanma is able to flirt with a girl, and not think about her again. the girl on the other end isn’t; you can’t count how many times you’ve swatted away girls who claim to be more compatible with hanma, over a single conversation they’ve had with him.

you’ve spoken to him about it before, and each and every time you do, hanma will hold you by the waist, plant kisses on all of your weak spots, and tell you that it’s fine, because they’re not you.

and each time he does this, you melt. how can you not? so you forgive him, and move past it, not talk about the girl who’d come after him (or you) that time.

the next time it happens, this particular event that is being recited, hanma doesn’t seem to be as sweet about it as he usually is.

“why are we always having this conversation?” hanma inquires, leaning to the right so he can see the television screen you are standing in front of. “i’m still with you, aren’t i?”

“oh, and i should be grateful, should i?” you snap, stepping to the side to block his view once again.

“well, yeah??” he nods his head, mockingly, before leaning to the left to see the tv.

you head towards the sofa, and snatch up the remote that’s resting on the armrest. you point it towards the little box, which turns off the screen. you pretend not to hear the annoyed, “oh my god,” that falls from hanma’s lips.

“you’re such a jackass! i’ve told you a thousand times that i don’t like it when you flirt with other girls, even if it’s just for fun! it hurts my feelings, and it hurts theirs, because then they fall for you, and then we — no, i — have to deal with chasing them away!”

“you know what?” hanma stands from his seat. it takes only a single, large step for him to be right up in front of you. he’s so close, one could mistake it for an intimate position. his voice even lowers an octave, but what comes out of his mouth is anything but romantic;

“dump me, if i’m hurting you so bad.”

“…what?” you inhale deeply, unable to keep the surprise, and hurt off of your face. it doesn’t affect him, not in the slightest. instead, hanma remains firm, gaze unwavering.

“go on,” he challenges. “just dump me.”

“i…” pushing the rapidly growing lump in your throat down is a challenge. and, even when you do feel like you’ll be able to utter a sentence without any hiccups, you still can’t find it in you to tell him what he wants to hear.

“i hate you.” so this comes out instead; no louder than a whisper. as you walk away, out of his living room into the hall, you plead with your body to hold on for just a little longer.

‘break down at home, in the street even. just not anywhere near him’.

but, the silent pleading does nothing. you push the front door’s handle down to open it, and a painful sounding whine escapes your lips.

hurried footsteps come to find you, and then hanma is there; shutting the door you hardly opened, he pulls you into his arms.

“i screwed up, i screwed up.” he tells you, over and over again. and you listen to him, nod frantically into the space between his shoulder and neck. “i’m sorry. so sorry, you hear me?”

he’s far from being let off the hook from his actions tonight, but his apology is at least a start.

[here’s my masterlist !]

[thesonoffireandice]

May I Have this Dance? [Shoto Todoroki x Reader]

Words: 1.2k

Tags: Fluff, Shoto Todoroki, Cute, Friends, More? 

Masterlist

Part 2 (Soon!)

--

Part 1

It was midterms at school was coming up and the stress was on. You loved your school, like come on who didn’t want to go to UA, but these months brought more stress than usual. You can’t really blame them though, this was part of the training to becoming a hero. Everyone is running up and down the halls, both to get to where they need to go, but also to prepare themselves physically for the exams.

It’s been a long week and all you want to do is sleep but unfortunately studying is more important and you plop yourself down in the silent library. By now it was after 9pm and most of the students and teachers have made their way out of the school, except for a the very few students that were still studying. You look around and seem to find no one around you, so you get your laptop out and a few of your books and get to work.

Minutes and eventually hours pass as you try to force yourself to stay awake. The library was almost certainly empty at this point, so you decide to leave your stuff for a second to take a quick stretch. A little walk should wake you up a bit.

You stretch your arms up as you start your quick stroll around the library when all of a sudden you hear faint typing. You stop in your tracks and quickly hide in the stacks of the library. You slowly walk towards the centre of the room where the typing was coming from. Slowly the typing was getting louder until you sneak around a corner and see a student hunched over his laptop typing frantically. His half white half red hair was a mess as he loudly erased a sentence he just now seemed to type. You stood there for a bit longer until the typing stopped. The boy kind of sat there for a second and stared into the distance so you decided to speak up.

“Todoroki?” You softly called as you took a step closer. Todoroki whipped his head around to look over his shoulder as he recognized the voice. “Y/N?” He didn’t except to see you here this late, let alone have you basically sneak up behind him. “Be careful with how you sneak up on people, that could have ended badly” He said as you quietly laughed to yourself.

The two of you aren’t the closest of friends, but since you were in the same year of study you were relatively friendly. You’ve come across each other in your training and you would be lying if you said you didn’t admire his work. Todoroki was a very talented student, he was very smart and studious and was always looking for ways to improve himself. You shouldn’t be surprised that he was here this late in the library trying to do the best he can in his work.

“I’m sorry about that, I just didn’t think anyone else was in the library, what’re you working on?” You pulled up a seat next to him and peeked over his arm to see what he was typing. “Just an essay for Aizawa that I can’t seem to get right,” he said quietly, you can hear the anger in his voice that he’s trying to keep down. “Oh the one for hero history! Ya I’m doing the same one! Do you mind if I bring my stuff and join you?” He turned towards you and kind of just looked at you for a second before turning his attention back to his screen. “Sure why not.” He said flatly. You smiled as you got up, and went to go grab your stuff. You didn’t know Todoroki well, but you knew he was a kind person, and a VERY talented student, so why not study together?

This little study buddy arrangement ended up becoming a regular routine for the two of you. Everyday you would meet at the library, sit at a table together, and study whatever had to be done that day. Sometimes it was working on an assignment that was due that week, or studying for a test that was the next morning and you definitely did not forget that it was happening, you just didn’t study much…

Your study routine turned into becoming training partners, going on regular runs and going to the gym together. Slowly but surly, the two of you got closer and closer. This kept going on for the rest of the school year. You would be lying if you said you didn’t slowly develop a crush on the boy. With every passing day he was opening up more and more and it was beautiful to see the trust developing between you two.

One morning he stopped in front of your house so you could walk to school with a little brown paper bag in his hand. You stepped out of your house and waved at him as you locked your front door. Once you made your way over to him, he held the paper bag out for you to take. The movement was quite abrupt and even startled you a bit, but it was cute that he brought you something.

With pink blush rising to your cheeks, you took the paper bag from his hands, “Thank you Shoto, what is it?” You said taking a peek into the bag. “Just some cookies my sister made,” he said with his hands in his pockets, looking down at the ground. You couldn’t tell but the boy was flustered out of his mind. He wasn’t used to being emotional, let alone having feeling for someone. As you’ve gotten closer at some point Shoto has realized he has been falling for you more than a friend and he was unsure of what to do. He was certain he didn’t want anything to distract him from becoming a hero and his training, but at the same time, he was also sure that he liked the feeling of warmth when you practiced together. He wasn’t sure of where he wanted things to go, but for now he was happy with having a friendly face by his side.

“We should get going, we’re going to be late at this rate.” Todoroki started to walk faster but always made sure that you we’re keeping up with him.

After a quick walk to school, you made it just in time to get situated in class comfortably. You sat down in your seats waiting for the teacher to enter the classroom. You were turned around to talk to Ochako about the next class project. Once you heard the classroom door open everyone sat properly in their seats and watched Mr. Aizawa walk to the front of the class. “Good morning class.” He said in his usual deadpanned voice.

“Good morning sir!” the class responded. There was a moment of silence while Aizawa got his papers ready for the day. “Alright everyone, the announcement you all have been waiting for, the annual dance is coming up in 2 weeks. Don’t let that distract you too much from your classes.” He said and with that your mind began to run. You knew who you wanted to go with, but now it was a matter of asking him to go.

You turned your head to look at Todoroki but quickly turned away as you met his gaze on you. You looked ahead with your cheeks red in embarrassment. How were you going to do this?

[demonpoxballad]

Maybe I Should Leave

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Word count: 1570

Summary: social anxiety at a party vibes - reader is new to the Avengers compound, and she struggles with shyness.

Warnings: swearing, social anxiety

Masterlist

Hey! I'm done with exams and I'm looking forward to writing more! This is my first time writing Bucky eeek. I found writing in present tense a real mind-fuck so let me know if you spot any mistakes!

- Liv xxx

Maybe she shouldn’t have come. It’s all a bit too much. The music rumbling low in her stomach. All of the very important colleagues that she barely knows. And the lights are giving her a headache concentrated right behind her eyeballs. She could, of course, try getting a little drunk. Just a little bit, to ease the nerves. But sometimes the agony of remembering the night before is worse than spending the entire night excruciatingly sober.

She peers around the room from her strategic spot in the corner next to the bar, searching for some allies. Helen ditched her a while ago to go and drool over Thor, and Wanda is exchanging especially moony glances with Vision. There’s no way in hell she’s going to interrupt whatever kind of rendezvous Natasha has going on with Agent Hill at the other end of the bar.

Bruce could be a safe option. Yeah. She could just go over there and sit with him and talk about physics, or whatever. He’s always kind to her, and patient whenever her brain short-circuits and she starts talking like she was born yesterday.

She starts strolling over to the chair in target, resisting the urge to fiddle with the bracelets at her wrist. But then Steve wanders over and steals her spot, the bastard, and her pace falters. She can’t even see if there’s another chair available near them, but it doesn’t matter, because she also can’t just go and join in a conversation with Steve. He’s too… well. Everything, really.

There’s a door just ahead to her right and she elbows her way through it, as if she had meant to the whole time. No one would notice anyway; she’s like a ghost in the compound, so used to being barely there that she doesn’t get surprised anymore when people forget about her. Stumbling out into the hallway, she rounds the corner and then presses her back flat against the wall, staring at the reflection of herself in the framed painting hanging on the wall opposite.

“Shit, shit. Fuck.” Tears threaten to spill the makeup she spent so much time on all over her face. “You can do this; you can be a normal fucking person. Just, uhhh, you can – ”

“Hey. Are you okay?”

************************************************

Why does he even come to these things? Honestly, Stark parties just make Bucky long for the time before, when he could just pick up a beautiful girl and take her to a nice dance. Things were simpler back then. He used to know all the steps to all the songs. And how to make people laugh.

Nights like these are usually spent grimacing at Sam’s teasing, until he gets bored and goes off to find some people who “actually know how to have a good time.” Bucky can’t blame him.

So he’s left leaning against the wall with a whiskey, feeling his left arm vibrating uncomfortably along with the bass of the music. At least she’s here. Bucky likes to people watch, and one of his favourite people to look at is her. She’s perched up on a barstool, no drink in sight. The dress she’s wearing does funny things to his breathing rate, and he finds himself absent-mindedly rubbing his lips together whenever his eyes dawdle over her form. She looks relaxed, apart from the tapping fingers and flitting eyes he can spot so well.

He watches as she seems to make some internal decision, skirting around the edge of the room towards the sofas at the other end. And then she disappears, Bucky’s view obscured by shifting figures on the dancefloor. He frowns, wondering whether he should go after her or not.

Maybe she’s just going to the ladies’ room. He should at least check the corridor to make sure she’s okay. But if she’s not okay, would she really want to see him? What if she needs help?

Despite himself, Bucky is knocking back his drink, setting it down and walking towards the nearest door, following around the corridor that surrounds the party room. He can hear her muttering to herself, and he quickens his pace, heavy boots echoing on the sharp wooden floor. He rounds the corner and she’s in sight now, talking manically to a painting on the wall opposite.

“… you can be a normal fucking person. Just, uhhh, you can – ”

“Hey. Are you okay?”

“Huh?” She turns to him, eyes wide and brimming with tears. Bucky wants to wipe them away, to kiss her and taste the salt on her skin. “Oh, shit. Yeah, I’m fine, honestly.” There’s that forced bashful smile that looks more like poorly-masked pain. “I think I’m just gonna go to bed, I’m really tired.” She presses one heel against the wall and stands up straight, brushing her hands down her dress and turning to stalk towards the main foyer, where the lifts are.

Bucky paces after her, quickly catching up with his long strides. “Listen, I know we don’t talk much, but – ”

She interrupts and lifts a palm out towards him, still walking quickly down the corridor. “It’s okay, Bucky. You don’t have to…” she trails off with a sigh, glancing up briefly to his face. “I know I can be difficult to talk to.”

“No, wait.” He steps out in front of her, blocking her swift exit. She stumbles slightly in her heels and catches herself on his outstretched forearms. “You’re fine, really. I was gonna say the same thing about myself.”

She frowns then, an accusatory look in her eyes. “… What? Why?” She slowly removes her hands from his arms, and Bucky wishes she didn’t.

“You know. I’m grumpy looking. And I have the - ” He jiggles his right hand aimlessly in front of him. “The staring problem.”

She looks at him with furrowed eyebrows for a second, gaze shifting between his eyes. And then she surprises him by sniggering, her chin all dimpled and eyes sparkling. “I think I may have felt the wrath of your stare once or twice.”

Bucky grins. “That’s only because you’re pretty.” He quickly diverts the subject before she can process that comment. “What I’m trying to say is that I get it. You are quiet. But I like that about you, actually.”

“I don’t – oh. Thank you?” She’s still looking right into his eyes, and he finds that he needs to focus on his breathing. It feels like he’s falling, in a nice, floaty way. “I just have this thing where I’m really quiet until I get to know people. It’s especially bad in a group setting; like I just have to disappear and observe for a while, until I know it’s safe,” she explains.

“Safe for what?”

“I don’t know." She shrugs. "Safe to be, I suppose.”

He doesn’t really know what to say to that.

“I’m sorry, Bucky. I don’t know why I’m telling you all this. You should go back to the party, really.” She steps to the side, as if it were her blocking his way the whole time.

He grimaces, glancing over to the pulsating lights and music spilling from the door next to her. “Yeah, uhhh. I don’t really want to.”

“That’s not fair,” she says, an incredulous tone to her voice.

“What?” Bucky genuinely can’t fathom why she sounds upset at him now.

Her eyebrows are pulled up together in the middle, the corners of her mouth drifting towards the floor. “You can’t let me ruin your night.”

He smirks, shaking his head. “You’re not. I’m invested now.”

“Invested in what?”

“I’m on a mission, to uncover the Real You.”

She looks away from his face, towards another one of Tony’s paintings on the wall. “That’s ridiculous.”

“Seriously, doll. I want you to be comfortable.”

“I’m comfortable.”

“Clearly not.” He gestures towards the mascara running down her cheekbones.

“Do I look terrible?”

“No. No, here – I can get it.” He gently blots away the darkness smudged under her eyes, nudging her chin up towards him with his other hand. He can’t help but let the tip of his thumb linger at the pretty curve of her lower lash line. “Come on, let’s get you a drink.”

She shakes her head. “I don’t want to get drunk.”

“Just one. We can sit in the corner and make fun of everyone. Have you ever seen Steve drunk before? It’s really funny.” He gently touches the back of her arm, steering her towards the party.

“Okay,” she relents, even though she’s already halfway through the door that he pulled open for her. They make their way over to the bar, Bucky cringing at the suggestive nod and panto-wink Natasha sends his way. He orders another whiskey for himself and a cocktail for her, nothing too lethal.

She’s leaning against the bar on one elbow, her other hand restlessly smoothing over the top of her hair. He should tell her how beautiful she looks.

“You look really good, by the way,” he chokes out. God, that was pathetic.

Her hand pauses at the nape of her neck, eyebrows raising in surprise. “Oh, well. Thanks.” Her eyes only meet Bucky’s for a few milliseconds at a time, and he wishes they would stick. She has such pretty eyes. “I’m wearing really good spanx.” Her face winces immediately after blurting that out, head bowed towards the floor.

He takes a sip of his drink and shakes his head. “I don’t know what that means.”

She lets out a relieved sounding laugh. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter.”

[cocobeanncteez]

ATEEZ San- Back to you (oneshot)

Genre: angst, fluff, suggestive, university au.

Pairing: badboy!San x reader (fem)

Word Count: 7.3K

Warnings: profanities, alcohol consumption, smoking, mentions of bullying and cheating, drink spiking, and attempted sexual assault.

Except Ateez, all other names are fictional.

"I don't understand how these stupid people party here when we've got exams in two weeks," your bestfriend, Doyeon, muttered under her breath while scribbling down some notes. You both were at a café in your university, studying for the upcoming exams.

You chuckled, glancing up at her from your notebook. "Your boyfriend is one of those stupid people who are partying right now."

She rolled her eyes. "Believe me, I want to smack Yunho with this," she held up her notebook, making you snort. "I'm surprised you don't get frustrated when San is literally doing the same thing."

"Well, it's his life," you said. "I'm not his parent who can nag at him to study."

San and you have been dating for a little over eight months now; other than Doyeon and San's friends, no one else knew about your relationship. Doyeon and Yunho were also dating for a while now. You both didn't really know why the boys didn't want other people to know about your relationship, but you both just went with the flow despite witnessing girls throwing themselves at them everyday. Doyeon was really calm about the whole situation, but you actually weren't even though you never let it show; you were quite worried about San leaving you for other women who were like him. You never understood why he's dating someone like you: the type who rarely parties, rarely drinks, never smokes, decently studies and gets good grades, never gets involved in fights; the opposite of him, basically.

Doyeon was about to say something, but your conversation was interrupted by someone who suddenly sat beside you in your booth, placing a textbook on the table. "Don't mind me, ladies," one of your university's badboys, Kangmin, said. "There was no place to sit, so here I am."

Ji Kangmin was handsome, and a typical badboy from what you've heard. You didn't really know much about him personally, but you knew his friend group and your boyfriend's group were rivals and often got into fights.

"I'm surprised you're here," Doyeon stated, raising an eyebrow. "Shouldn't you be at some party?"

"I don't party when exams are near," he said with a small smile. "I know I don't have a good reputation, but unlike other people here who have the same reputation as me, I actually want to score well and decently graduate." You were stunned, not expecting to hear that from someone like him. Well, maybe all badboys aren't the same.

-

"Babe!" San whined sleepily when you pulled his blanket off his body. "God, my head fucking hurts."

"Serves you right for drinking all night," you said, running a hand through his messy black hair.

"But the party was epic," he mumbled, eyes closing at the way you played with his hair.

After a few minutes, San took some painkillers and got up to take a shower. When he finished, he immediately pulled you into a hug. "I missed you," he said, burying his face in the crook of your neck.

You chuckled. "You saw me yesterday morning."

"But that was in class," he murmured, placing soft kisses on your neck, making your heart race. "I didn't get to talk to you."

"Then maybe you should start talking to me in class," you said and immediately regretted it when you felt San tense up.

San moved a step back to look at you. "Babe, you know I can't do that," he stated. "I don't want people to know about us or start—"

"Yeah, I know," you cut him off with a small smile, hiding your disappointment. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

"It's fine," he said, kissing your forehead. "Let's go have breakfast, yeah?"

"Um, actually, I have to go back to my dorm," you said, making San frown and ask why. "I've got a study session with Doyeon," you lied; you just didn't feel like being here at the moment.

San sighed, cupping your cheeks. "Babe, you study so much. These exams don't matter much."

Your eyebrows furrowed. "San, these are end of the first semester exams. They're extremely important."

San didn't say anything; he only leaned down to capture your lips with his own. "Stay for a little while, please," he murmured against your lips. Before you could protest, he kissed you again, this time more passionately. He gently pushed you onto his bed, hovering above you before reconnecting your lips. Your hands wrapped around his neck, playing with the hair at his nape. One of San's hands slipped under your blouse, moving to cup your breast, giving it a squeeze. You gasped due to his actions and he took the opportunity to slide his tongue into your mouth, deepening the kiss. Your phone began ringing but both of you ignored it. You were getting wetter by the second and you could feel San's growing bulge pressing against you. When your phone rang for the fourth time, San pulled away with an annoyed sigh. You chuckled, getting up from his bed to get your phone from your bag.

"Hello?" you answered.

"Where are you?! Class is gonna start in ten minutes!" Doyeon exclaimed.

"What? What class? All our classes were canceled for today."

"Mr. Byun said he's gonna take class today. Didn't you check your email?"

"Fuck. I'll be there in five." You hung up and quickly checked your reflection in San's mirror, reapplying your lip balm and tying your hair into a ponytail. San's eyes were on you the entire time.

"Are you ditching your lovely boyfriend for a class?" San asked with a pout. "Especially when you made him get all hard?"

"Yes," you replied with a small giggle. "I'll make it up to you when I'm done, I promise." you placed a quick kiss on his lips before rushing to your dorm to collect your stuff.

-

"Can I sit here?" you heard someone ask, making you look up from your notebook. Ji Kangmin was giving you a small smirk. "Seats are full."

"Go ahead," you said, returning your attention back onto your books. Fortunately, Kangmin studied quietly, not disturbing you even once.

"Why is this so hard?" you muttered under your breath, eyebrows furrowing in irritation due to the differentiation problem you've been breaking your head for.

"Need help?" Kangmin asked.

"Are you good at calculus?"

He snorted, showing you the cover of his textbook. "I'm a math major, darling." Your eyes widened, not expecting that at all. "I thought you knew but you clearly don't," he said with a chuckle. "But I know you're a computer science major." He reached for your notebook, scanning through what you've written. "Ah, so this is where you went wrong," he murmured before explaining everything to you.

After a good three hours of studying, you got up and stretched your arms. Kangmin helped you with a few sums and told you many tricks and tips to save time and make the problems easier to solve. He walked with you to your dorm building since his was right opposite yours. You caught a few people staring at the two of you, but you brushed it off; Kangmin was popular, so obviously they would stare. You had to admit, it felt quite weird to see people staring at you. You were sure they all would react the same way if you were with San.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Kangmin grinned, running his hand through his brown hair. You nodded with a smile before entering your dorm building.

-

You spent the entire week studying with Kangmin and sometimes Doyeon joined the two of you. You were really anxious about the exams, but Kangmin managed to make you calm down a little; you were really grateful for his company.

"So Jihoon asked me out and I said yes!" Hyewon said, making you and Doyeon squeal.

"Girl! I told you this day would come!" Doyeon exclaimed, making Hyewon blush. You and Doyeon teased her for blushing, laughing at how her cheeks got even pinker.

San secretly glanced at you from across the classroom, smiling at the sight of you laughing; he thought you were absolutely beautiful.

"What's he doing here?" Jongho muttered, making San and Mingi follow his line of sight.

"Probably here to find someone to fuck," Mingi said in an unbothered tone.

San focused his attention back on you until that very person tapped your shoulder. "Why the fuck is he talking to my girl?!"

You turned to look at the person who tapped your shoulder. "Oh, hey, Kangmin! What are you doing here?" you asked.

He pulled a notebook from his bag, handing it over to you. "I accidentally took your notebook yesterday, so I came to return it," he said. "Sorry about that."

"Oh no, it's okay, don't worry about it," you smiled. He was about to say something, but your professor arrived, so he had to leave and go to his own class.

After the lecture ended, you had lunch with Doyeon, Hyewon, and Jihoon at your dorm's dining hall. You couldn't help but gush about how great Hyewon and Jihoon's chemistry was; they were the cutest couple you have ever seen.

Your phone rang and you picked it up as it was San. "Hello?"

"Where are you?" San asked, sounding a little annoyed.

"At my dorm's dining hall," you replied. "Why?"

"Come to your room right now," he said and hung up before you could say anything. You quickly had the last few bites of your food before excusing yourself, telling your friends you had some work to do.

You made your way over to your room, spotting San right outside your door, wearing a blue hoodie with the hood up and a black mask. You unlocked your door with your key-card, feeling a little anxious due the serious look in your boyfriend's eyes. He closed the door before moving to sit on your bed.

"Sannie, what's wrong?" you asked, moving to stand in front of him. He stared up at you, staying silent for a while before he took off his mask, tossing it on your desk.

"Why did Ji Kangmin talk to you today?"

"He accidentally took my notebook yesterday so he came to return it," you answered honestly.

San raised an eyebrow. "Yesterday? Why were you with him yesterday?" he asked in a stern tone.

"We were studying. He was helping me with calculus."

San scoffed, getting off your bed. "I'm sure that's not what his true intentions are. Stay away from him." San's words annoyed you.

"And how do you know what his true intentions are?" you asked. "We were literally just studying, that's all."

"I don't fucking like him, Y/N. He isn't a good person and I don't want him anywhere near you. So please just stay away from him."

You sighed, glancing at the tiny cat tattoo on San's finger. "Fine..."

San gently cupped your cheek, making you look at him. He didn't like how disappointed you looked and he couldn't help but think about Kangmin stealing you away from him. "Baby... please trust me, he's just trying to get into your pants." You wanted to tell him that all those girls who flirt with him wanted the same, but you knew he already knew that and he liked the attention he got.

"Okay..." You moved away from him, picking up your textbook from your desk and placing it on your bed. "Do you wanna study with me?" you asked San.

"Nah, I'm not in the mood to study."

"You never are," you snorted, earning a wink from him.

"You study, I'll just take a nap here beside you," he said, placing a kiss on your forehead, lying down on your bed.

"Don't try anything, San," you warned him, lying down beside him. He chuckled, placing an arm around your waist, pulling you closer to his body.

San fell asleep while you studied. When you took a small break, you couldn't help but admire your sleeping boyfriend; he looked so angelic... ethereal, even. You placed a light kiss on his cheek before slowly getting off the bed to go to the bathroom.

When you came back, San was awake. "How long did I sleep?" he asked in a raspy voice.

"Almost two hours," you said, returning to your bed.

"Oh... oh crap! I should get ready. I've got a party to go to tonight," he said, stretching his arms. "Do you wanna come?"

You raised an eyebrow. "You already know my answer to that."

He chuckled, kissing your head. "Have fun studying, babe."

---

"Finally!" Doyeon yelled in happiness. "We're finally done after two weeks of torture!"

"Thank god we have an entire week off," you said, gently massaging your aching wrist.

"These exams were way harder than I expected," Hyewon said and you agreed. "You both are coming for Kang Hyunsuk's party tonight, right?"

"Of course! It's in a huge mansion, you know? Besides, I need to get drunk and laid in luxury," Doyeon said, making you and Hyewon laugh.

You quickly got ready at Doyeon's dorm in the evening before taking a cab to Kang Hyunsuk's mansion that was fortunately not too far away.

The mansion was decorated with LED lights inside and out. The large hall was converted into a dance floor and he even hired a DJ. You were sure more than half of the students at your college was here, and there were certainly a lot of people from the neighboring colleges as well.

Doyeon grabbed your hand, pulling you to the large kitchen where the drinks and snacks were. You both took two shots of vodka each before you greeted some of your classmates. Doyeon was already really tipsy due to her poor alcohol tolerance. On the other hand, you took another shot and you were still quite sober.

"Wow, Y/N, you look so hot!" Hyewon said, approaching you with Jihoon.

You were wearing a lacy dusty-rose bralette with black ripped jeans and combat boots. The bralette showed off more cleavage than you'd usually show, but you were feeling a little extra today.

You noticed Yunho approaching the kitchen with Seonghwa and Hongjoong, his eyes scanning Doyeon from head to toe. You nudged Doyeon with your elbow, gesturing to Yunho with your eyes. She glanced around, eyes landing on Yunho who gave her a smirk. She smiled at him before moving towards him. She whispered something in his ears, making him drag her away immediately. You weren't expecting your bestfriend to ditch you this early, but oh well.

"Hey Y/N," Seonghwa greeted you. "Have you seen San or Jongho?"

"Nope, I came to the kitchen as soon as I got here," you replied, pouring yourself another shot.

"Ah, all right." Seonghwa and Hongjoong took a drink before they disappeared into the crowd.

One of your friends dragged you outside to the area beside the swimming pool; she wanted to introduce you to some people from another university. You spotted San, Jongho, Wooyoung, Mingi, and Yeosang on the other of the pool, surrounded by girls as usual. There were a few guys there and they were all playing a game of spin the bottle. There was a girl sitting on your boyfriend's lap, and that annoyed you a lot. You couldn't do anything about it since San didn't want anyone to know about your relationship. When you got to see the girl's face, your eyes widened; it was your ex-bestfriend, Park Hyejoo. You scoffed in disbelief; San knew who she was and what she did to you in high school, yet he let her sit on his lap. You tried not to pay attention to them by focusing on the conversation your friend was having with the people she had introduced you to. It somewhat worked... until you heard cheers and whistles which caught everyone's attention.

Hyejoo's face was buried in San's neck, no doubt giving him a hickey. He wasn't even pushing her away. You felt your eyes tear up, but you blinked it away. You couldn't look away until she pulled away. And then she kissed him, causing you to gasp.

"Why are you so surprised?" your drunk friend asked you. "She fucks around as much as Choi San does. I even heard they're fuck buddies."

San pulled away from Hyejoo, but he only smirked at her, making no effort to push her off his lap. Yeosang—who was sitting beside San—noticed you watching, and he immediately elbowed San. "You fucked up big time, bro," Yeosang murmured in his ear.

"What do you mean?" San asked.

"Y/N's over there. She saw everything."

San glanced around until his eyes found your disappointed and sad ones. He wasn't even expecting you to attend the party. He scanned you from head to toe, eyes darkening due to the way you looked in that outfit.

"You dumb fuck," Yeosang muttered, low enough for only San to hear. "Are you seriously eye-fucking her right now? Put your damn reputation aside and go talk to her before you fuck shit up more, idiot!"

San excused himself, pushing your ex-bestfriend off his lap, making his way over to you. But of course, he couldn't be seen with you, so he just gestured with his head for you to follow him. Even though you were so upset, you followed him a few seconds later. He stopped at the garden where there was no one; you could still hear the blasting music from here.

San was dressed in all black and he looked absolutely irresistible. You would've asked him to fuck you right here against the wall, but you were damn pissed at the moment.

"Damn, babe," he said, lips pulling into a smirk. "My girl's looking so hot." He reached out to pull you into his arms, but you took a step back. San frowned. "Babe..."

"You knew what Hyejoo did to me," you said with a bitter chuckle. "And you let her sit on your lap." You pointed at the hickey on his neck. "You let her do that to you despite the fact that you have a girlfriend, who is in fact, standing right in front of you!" You would never lash out like this if it wasn't for the alcohol in your system. Hyejoo bullied you a lot in high school to the point where you had to change schools. San knew every little detail of what Hyejoo did, and you remembered how angry he was when you told him about it.

"Babe, calm down, please," San said softly.

"Calm down? You want me to calm down?! That fucking bitch was sitting on your fucking lap the entire time and she gave you a damn hickey! You didn't even stop her!"

"It was just a dare and—"

You scoffed. "And what about the kiss?"

"She kissed me. I didn't kiss back, I swear!"

"And you made no effort to push her off your damn lap even after that, right?"

San sighed; he really didn't want to fight with you right now. "I think you're overreacting, Y/N. Like I said, it was only a dare."

"Yeah, how about I go sit on another man's lap and suck his neck, hmm? I fucking bet you would love that," you chuckled bitterly. San clenched his jaw at your words; if that were to ever happen, he wouldn't hesitate to punch that guy.

"That's not going to happen," he placed his hands on your bare waist, pulling you against his body. "Let's not fight, okay?" he murmured, kissing your head.

You moved away from him, eyeing the hickey on his neck with disgust. "Fuck off, San," you mumbled. "I need a damn drink." Before San could could say anything, you made your way to the table of drinks beside the pool. You quickly downed three shots, eyes closing at the way the liquid burned your throat.

"Woah, woah, slow down there. You'll choke," you heard someone say from behind you.

"Who gives a fuck?" you muttered.

"Well, I certainly do, darling," Kangmin said, moving to stand in front of you. "You look really nice, even though you look like you could murder someone right now."

You glanced at San who returned back to where he was sitting before. Hyejoo started clinging to him, and he made no effort to do anything about it again. You rolled your eyes, not even surprised that your words went into San's ears and left just as fast. "Believe me, I want to," you said, feeling the alcohol starting to hit you harder.

"I don't know who pissed you off, but loosen up, yeah?" Kangmin said, pouring himself a drink. You noticed the tattoos all over his arms, one of them catching your eye. You grabbed his arm, trying to get a better look. "It's a... squirting dick?" you tried to control yourself from laughing.

"My friend's a tattoo artist and he tattooed it on me without telling me," he said with a chuckle.

"I want one too," you whined. "I want one now."

"What? A squirting dick?"

You lightly punched his bicep, swaying a little due to the effect of the alcohol in your system. "No, a good tattoo!"

"You're drunk right now, darling," he chuckled. "It's never a good idea to get a tattoo when you're drunk, trust me."

You pouted. "But I want a tattoo."

He placed his cup on the table and moved his hands to cup your cheeks. "I promise I'll take you to get a tattoo this week, okay? Now, let's go dance, hmm?" You nodded, letting him drag you inside to the dance floor.

San saw everything and his hands clenched into fists. He was so tempted to punch Kangmin and yell at him to stay away from you, but he couldn't risk his reputation like that; he didn't want anyone to know about your relationship no matter what. San went to where you were standing before, taking a tequila shot while he wondered what to do.

"Ji Kangmin and Y/N? Damn!" San overheard someone say.

"I didn't expect him to make a move on her," the other person said. "She's a goody two shoes and he's far from that."

"Kangmin likes women like that actually," the first person said. "And Y/N is very pretty. I'm not very surprised that he went for her."

"Hmm. They do look great together. He seems to like her a lot, no? I saw him walk her to her dorm last week." San's jaw clenched and he quickly made his way inside, searching for you. The dance floor was so crowded, he couldn't even get a glimpse of you anywhere. He tried calling you, but you didn't pick up. He tried calling Doyeon, but she didn't pick up as well.

"Fucking hell," he muttered under his breath, moving through tons of drunk, sweaty people, trying to find you.

After nearly fifteen minutes, he found you sitting alone on of the sofas, head resting on the armrest. "Y/N!"

"Kangmin...?" you lifted your head. "Oh, it's you."

"We're leaving," San said, grabbing your hand.

"No, f-fuck you," you hiccupped. "Go fuck off to Hyejoo." San ignored your words, taking his phone out to book a cab to his apartment. He helped you stand up and pulled you along with him. You wanted to protest, but your body was aching and you really just wanted to sleep.

You fell asleep on San's shoulder in the cab. He carried you bridal style and unlocked his door with the passcode, moving to his bedroom. He gently placed you on the bed and removed your boots. You opened your eyes due to the movement, feeling quite sick. "San..." you murmured. "I think I'm gonna throw up." San quickly lifted you up and took you to the bathroom, holding your hair back while you threw up in his toilet. He gently rubbed your back until you were done.

You brushed your teeth with the toothbrush you kept at San's place, and you took a quick hot shower, sobering a little. San gave you one of his t-shirts to wear and he dried your hair for you.

As soon as your head landed on the pillow, you fell asleep.

-

When you woke up, your head was pounding terribly. You slowly opened your eyes, immediately recognizing that you were in San's apartment; you couldn't remember much of what happened last night. You moved to his bathroom to take a painkiller and finish your morning routine. After you took a shower, you wore one of his black hoodies with one of your shorts that you usually kept at his place.

You felt a pair of muscly arms wrap around you. "You look so good in my clothes," San murmured, placing a kiss on your head. You turned around in his arms, titling your head back to look at him. You were about to wrap your arms around his neck, but your eyes landed on the hickey on his neck, reminding you of the events that happened last night, making you immediately pull yourself away from his embrace.

San frowned. "Babe—"

"San," you start. "Is your reputation that important that you can't even push another girl away when she's throwing herself at you? Especially when you know just how terrible that girl is?" you asked.

San took your hands in his. "Y/N, I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have let—"

"But you still did," you argued. "Why don't you want to tell people about us, San? Is it because I'm not like you or your friends? Do you think I'm not attractive enough to be next to you?" He didn't say anything. "I feel like you're just using me," you continued, remembering the amount of times you've heard people say San only screws around. "Do you even love me?" The last question made San freeze. You had fallen in love with San months ago, but he didn't know and probably wouldn't have even noticed.

You waited for him to say something, but he only kept quiet, eyes fixated to the floor. "San, I think we should just," you gulped, eyes tearing up again. "We should b-break up. I really can't tolerate this anymore..." Your words felt like knifes were constantly slicing his heart. "Don't you have anything to say?" you asked, hoping he would fight for you or convince you that continuing this relationship is worth it. You wished he would change.

"How can I when you've already made up your mind?" San murmured, avoiding your eyes. "If you think breaking up is what's best then okay..." he wanted to say much more. He wanted to beg you to not leave him. He wanted to tell you just how much he loved you. But he couldn't. Even if he tried, he just couldn't.

"I'll collect my stuff from here tomorrow," you mumbled, putting your boots on. San could only nod as he watched you.

Before you could leave, San stopped you. "I... I just wanted to ask you... if you ever," he took a deep breath. "If you ever loved me."

You smiled sadly. "It doesn't matter," you whispered, but it was loud enough for him to hear you. "Take care, San," you mumbled before walking out the door, shattering his heart.

-

"You fucked up even more," Yeosang said, watching San smoke a cigarette.

"That's very helpful. Makes me feel great," San stated sarcastically, blowing the smoke to the air.

"No offense, Sannie, but I agree with Yeosang," Hongjoong said. "You should've told her how you felt instead of keeping quiet."

"I know," San sighed. "But she already made up her mind."

"Dude, you're really dense," Wooyoung stated. "She asked you if you had something to say. That translates to 'fight for me.' I don't think you've noticed, but Y/N is definitely in love with you."

San's head shot up. "She wouldn't have broken up with me if she really loved me, Woo."

Seonghwa groaned in frustration. "If I was in Y/N's place, I would dump your stupid ass too."

"Agreed," Yeosang said. "I told you before, San, your reputation is going to fuck up everything. You need to let go of your past as well before it's too late."

"Ji Kangmin's got his eyes on her," Mingi stated. "I heard his friends talking about it."

"Yeah, I heard that too. Y/N is close to him," Jongho added.

San rolled his eyes, taking a drag from the cigarette. "He has nothing else to do other than stealing the girls I like."

"Exactly, and you're letting him do it again," Yunho said, taking the cigarette away from San and crushing it with his shoes. "You have to make a decision Sannie. Either you sort things out with Y/N, or you lose the woman you love to that very bastard again."

---

"So you had the hots for Y/N, huh?" Kangmin asked San while he waited in line to order his drink.

"That's none of your business," San said in a cold tone to his ex-bestfriend.

"I saw you talking to her privately that day," he said, referring to the party you attended almost two weeks ago. San ignored his words. "I don't know what was going on between the two of you," Kangmin continued. "But whatever it was, I'm glad it didn't last long. I want to make her mine."

San scoffed. "You just want to get into her pants."

Kangmin snorted. "Obviously. But after spending two weeks with her, without you around, I'm quite interested. Y/N is gorgeous and has a great personality. She's a rare gem, you know? I bet she'd be just as wonderful in bed and tastes as sweet as she loo—"

San took a step towards Kangmin, grabbing the collar of his shirt. "If you don't shut the fuck up, I'll break your damn face!" San warned.

"Ohhh, I'm so scared," he teased, pushing San away. "Fuck off, Choi San. Someone like Y/N doesn't deserve a bastard like you. You weren't and will never be good enough for her." San chose to ignore him, not wanting to cause a big scene at the café. Kangmin's words stabbed him in the heart. San always thought he wasn't good enough for you, but he never expected to hear anyone say it out loud.

Kangmin's phone started ringing and he couldn't help the smirk that formed on his face. "Hey, gorgeous," he answered, loud and clear. "I'm at the café near your building, getting you your favorite drink and some cupcakes. I'll pick you up from class."

"That won't be necessary," you replied, pushing the door of the café to enter. You instantly spotted Kangmin and made your way towards him, unaware of San who was standing right behind him. "Hi!" you said to Kangmin who hung up once he saw you.

"Hey, beautiful! How was class?" he asked, secretly glancing at San; you still hadn't noticed San as your back was facing him.

"Ugh, tiring. I hate extra classes. I couldn't understand any—" your phone started ringing, interrupting your sentence. You answered the call as it was from your bestfriend.

"Where are you?" Doyeon asked.

"At the café near our dorm," you replied.

"Come over fast, we have to get ready for Hyewon's party. She wants us to come early cause she needs help."

"I'll be there in a bit."

-

"I didn't expect any of them to be here," you said to Doyeon while drinking some whiskey and coke from a red cup, watching your ex-boyfriend converse with his infamous group of friends; they usually went clubbing on Saturday nights. "Aren't you gonna go over to Yunho?"

"I don't wanna ditch you," she answered. You gently pushed her in Yunho's direction.

"Go, I'll be fine."

Before she could reply, Kangmin wrapped his arms around you, startling you a little. Doyeon gave you a wink before making her way towards her boyfriend, leaving you with Kangmin.

"Can we talk?" he whispered in your ear, making sure to move closer to your body once he noticed San watching. You nodded, letting him pull you upstairs. You had gotten quite close to Kangmin these last two weeks; you were really glad to have a friend like him. He distracted you from the pain you felt from not being with San anymore.

Kangmin gently pushed against the wall, trapping you between his arms. You gasped. "What are you doing?"

"I like you, Y/N," he confessed with a smile. "I wanna date you." Before you could say anything, he kissed you. You were a little too shocked, so you let him kiss you for a few seconds. When you regained your senses, you pushed him away. He stared at you, confused by your actions.

"Kangmin, I'm sorry, but I don't feel the same way..."

Kangmin rolled his eyes. "It's cause of Choi San, isn't it?"

"No," you lied. Of course it's cause of San. You were still in love with him. You didn't want to date anyone until you got over him. "I only see us as friends, Kangmin," you stated honestly. "You're a really good friend and I don't want to lose you."

Kangmin sighed. "Okay, let's just forget about this. Let's have a drink, hmm?" You nodded, following him downstairs to the kitchen.

You were talking to one of your friends while Kangmin got a drink for you.

"Thanks," you said, taking the cup from him. You took a sip of your drink. It tasted a little salty, but you didn't mind. You felt yourself relaxing a little while you nodded your head to the music. By the time you finished your drink, you felt pretty lightheaded. You clinged to Kangmin's arm. "Hey, could you take me to the couch?" you requested, words slurred. "I don't feel very good..."

"Of course," Kangmin lifted you into his arms, bridal style. He carried you upstairs into one of the rooms, shutting the door behind him with his foot. He placed you on the bed. "You don't know how long I've waited for this," he said, licking his lips while he took your crop-top off. You didn't know what was happening and your vision was really blurry. Kangmin pushed you onto your back before hovering above you. The sudden movement made your head spin even more, causing you to pass out. "Oh, too bad she couldn't stay conscious for this..." he murmured to himself. He ran his hands up from your jean-clad legs to the soft skin of your abdomen before reaching behind your body to unclasp your bra. Before he could pull the piece of clothing away from your body, the door swung open.

"You fucking bastard!" San yelled, pushing Kangmin off of you. Jongho and Hongjoong were right behind San.

"What the fuck, dude?!" Kangmin yelled. "Get out! Can't you see we're busy?!" His words pissed Jongho off. He immediately grabbed Kangmin by the collar and punched him twice in the nose. Kangmin fell to the floor, holding his broken, bloody nose in pain. Jongho wanted to punch him one more time, but Hongjoong held him back. "Don't. You'll end up killing him."

San started crying when he saw your passed out form; he couldn't even think about what would've happened if his friends didn't overhear Kangmin's friends talking about him spiking your drink. San clasped your bra back and put your crop-top on you before he lifted you into his arms. "I'm taking her to my apartment," he said to his friends.

"I'll drive you," Hongjoong offered.

-

When you woke up, you immediately recognized your surroundings. You had absolutely no idea of how you ended up in your ex-boyfriend's bedroom.

Your head was pounding and you wondered what time it was as it was really sunny outside. Before you could get off San's bed, he entered the room.

"You're awake," he said softly, relief clear in his eyes. "Take a shower and come eat. You must be really hungry."

"What happened? What's the time right now?" you questioned, your heart racing at the mere sight of him in a lilac hoodie and black sweatpants.

"I'll tell you after you eat," he said with a smile that didn't reach his eyes. "It's three in the afternoon. Doyeon got some clothes for you. There's a spare toothbrush in the bathroom."

"Thanks," you mumbled, getting up to go to the bathroom.

After you took a shower, you made your way to San's kitchen. You took a seat at the dining table, looking at all the different dishes on the table.

"You made all this?"

San shook his head. "I wasn't able to cook today. Wooyoung and Seonghwa made it. They left a few minutes ago." You noticed how tensed and sad he was; you wanted to ask him what was bothering him, but you knew he wouldn't answer your question until you ate.

You both ate in a comfortable silence. You tried to recall the events from last night, but you weren't able to. You frowned, wondering if you really drank that much.

"Are you all right, San?" you asked, settling on his couch after you both finished eating.

He took a deep breath and you noticed the slight dark circles beneath his eyes. "Can I hug y-you?" he asked, voice cracking while his eyes teared up.

You immediately scooted closer to him on the couch, wrapping your arms around him. He buried his face in the crook of your neck while he held you tightly. His body shook convulsively while he cried, his tears wetting your neck. You ran a hand through his soft hair, knowing it would help calm him down a little.

San pulled away from you, wiping his tears with the sleeve of his lilac hoodie. "I'm sorry..."

You grabbed his hand, intertwining it with yours. "What happened, Sannie?"

Hearing you call him by his nickname brought another set of fresh tears to his eyes. Your other hand reached up to wipe his tears away.

"I love you, Y/N," he confessed, more tears rolling down his cheeks. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you that before. I'm so sorry for being a jerk to you and prioritizing my reputation. I fucked up and I regret it so much." You took a deep breath, trying to control your rapid heartbeat while you listened to every word he said. "I felt like dying after what happened last night. I'm so sorry, this is all my fault," he sobbed.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What happened last night?"

"O-Oh you don't remember...?" You shook your head. San cleared his throat, trying his best to not to break down again. "Wooyoung and Hongjoong overhead Ji Kangmin's friends say that he spiked your drink after you rejected him." you froze in shock. "They immediately told us about it, and me, Hongjoong, and Jongho rushed over to you. You weren't conscious when we found you. Your top was off and he was about to take your bra off as well, but I pushed him away. Then Jongho punched him. I brought you here after that."

You stared at San in disbelief. "Kangmin s-spiked my drink...?"

San nodded. "He had it all planned. I'm sorry, Y/N... none of this would've happened if he didn't see us together." You were too shocked to say anything; you couldn't believe Kangmin would go this low just cause you rejected him. "Ji Kangmin was my bestfriend in high school. After I got a girlfriend, he acted like a bitch to me cause he wanted her. I really loved her, and she cheated on me with him. He spread a lot of false shit about me after I ended our friendship. When I tried to move on with another girl, he took her away from me too. I didn't want other people to know about us only because he would find out. I didn't want him anywhere near you because I knew he would try to take you away from me. I didn't push Hyejoo away that day because he was watching me and would get suspicious of my actions if I pushed her away. I tried my best to do everything that would keep him away from you, but I still failed..."

You burst into tears, wrapping your arms around San; you had no idea he went through all this. "I'm sorry, San. I should've listened to you when you told me he wasn't a good person," you managed to say through sobs.

"No, Y/N, I'm the one who should say sorry for not telling you all of this before." He held you, gently rocking you back and forth while he cried with you. "Thank you for rejecting him..."

You pulled away, cupping his cheek. "How could I ever date someone else when I'm love with you, San?"

His heart raced in his chest due to your words. "That's why you rejected him?"

You nodded. "And I'm glad I did."

San smiled, leaning his forehead against yours. "Can I..." he hesitated "Can I kiss you?"

"Yes, please."

San immediately captured your lips with his own, kissing you oh so gently. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer. He smiled, causing you to smile as well while you kissed him; you both missed this so much. The kiss was slow and soft, the two of you just wanting to savor this moment. Your hands played with his hair while his hands lazily ran down the expanse of your back. San pulled away, holding you tight against his chest.

"I know I hurt you a lot and I don't even deserve to speak to you right now... but I want to start over, Y/N," San said honestly. "I want to treat you the way you deserve... show you off to the world... I want to make things right between us. These two weeks were pure torture without you, and I realized that I can't... I can't live without you, Y/N. I really need you, baby."

You rested your head on his chest and you could hear his fast heartbeat. "I need some time, Sannie." you noticed him tense up a little and you knew exactly what he was thinking. "And no, this isn't me indirectly rejecting you or anything. I want to be with you, San. I always have and that isn't gonna change. I just need a little time, considering everything that happened." San nodded in understanding. "I promise that I will come back to you."

"I love you and I'll wait for you," San said, placing a kiss on your head.

"Thank you... I love you too, Sannie." He giggled, loving the way you say those three heart-fluttering words. He cupped your cheek to pull you into another sweet kiss, making your heart race again.

The two of you knew that no matter what, you both would always find your way back to each other.

[harfanfare]

How to win a heart of Jamil Viper?

1.   Don’t be a typical hero(ine).

Contrary to the popular romance trope, tripping over the air to land on a certain cool-looking boy, and dropping all carried things, wouldn’t make Jamil fall for you. Instead, just falling because of you and sharply crashing with a floor would make him rather cautious around you and keeping a distance whether he has anything in his hands.

Believe him or not, he doesn’t need another ditsy and erratic person around him—like a certain leader from a certain dorm, who happens to create a mess anytime, anywhere.

So, let someone else be the protagonist of the story.

In that situation, you may be a side character that gets its way through obstacles and classic borders of story scheme and is much more interesting than the main persona.

That’s how you get his attention.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

2.   Be a help.

Oh, a person that would help him with his chores means to him much more than gold. Sometimes.

“Can I help you anyhow?” you asked when Jamil was going to the kitchen after a daily training with the rest of the dorm. He lifted his eyebrow, waiting for further explanation. “I mean with cleaning or something.”

Jamil glanced at you, not sure about your intentions.

Who would like to do something to help without having something in return? With only your will? No, it doesn’t work well in the same sentence.

But some help would be great. So, he just needs to keep sure that he won’t fall into any trap for letting you help, yes?

“Sure,” he said casually, not letting his face nor voice reveal any of his thoughts he run into. “[Name], right? Could you bring and clean the dishes from longue?”

And you helped. You really helped him a lot, staying over two hours till everything was shimmering with cleanliness and your abrupt desire to clean something and be more useful, burned out.

“Thank you for your help,” Jamil said, after correcting the last cushion in the Scarabia’s longue. You flashed him a smile. “But why, if I can ask, did you offer it in the first place?”

He got a quick response in form of a shrug.

“I... don’t really know,” you admitted, glancing at him. “...But you don’t complain, no?”

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

3.   Be his dish taster.

“The way to a one's heart is through his stomach.”

“Try it,” Jamil handed you a spoon filled with some kind of stew. You consentaneously your opened mouth and drank all content of the spoon. Your mouth filled with many flavours and you couldn’t be sure if you ever ate that good combination in your life. “How was that?”

“Excellent as always.”

You said it all sincerely and maybe would have asked for seconds, if not the fact that Jamil already turned his back to you and got back to pots. He took another spoon and tried the dish himself, clicked his tongue and added more salt.

Once again, he turned to you and handed you a spoon.

“And how was that now?”

“Excellent as always,” you chuckled as he frowned at you.

“Don’t you think that you should add more words to your dictionary? You say the same thing on every dish,” once he said that you finished drying the last plate and preparing silverware for today’s fiesta.

“Don’t you think that I won’t be able to eat anything at the party when I will eat enough of your cooking now to write a poem about each of your culinary masterpieces?” Jamil chuckled slightly at your words.

“So, you don’t want any more?” he teased, but inside he was really flushed. Praises or cajolery, it all makes his heart skip a beat.

Finally, there was someone who appreciated all work he’s done.

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

4.   Distract Kalim from him.

“You really shouldn’t go there,” you said, your voice as serious as you could keep it. “I mean, what if there is a monster who wants to kidnap you?”

Kalim cocked his head a little, considering your words. After a while, he nodded, fully convinced by your argument.

“You’re right,” he said. “I will warn others about this..!”

Kalim turned on his heel and spotted some people returning from morning classes. He ran to them, greeting them and walking with them as he tried to introduce the situation.

Still not believing Kalim fall for your words, you were standing alone in the centre of the corridor, a bit dumbstruck to discover the excuse Jamil came up with work.

“...Are you sure, you don’t want to tell him that some student’s from other dorm are here?” you asked as if saying to yourself your thoughts aloud.

But there was someone, someone who was hiding behind a big potted palm. He only gave you thumbs up as a preventative measure if there was still a chance that Kalim didn’t just dash through the halls to talk with some dorm students.

Jamil only looked at you and mouthed “No. Party. Today.” and quietly shifted to the corner, where the wall hid him and he could finally get up.

Mission accomplished.

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

5.   Get rid of bugs for him.

“[Name],” Jamil called out to you, bursting through the door to your room. He looked very pale and panic was staying still in his eyes. “Would you be so kind to... deal with an intruder?”

You frowned a little before biting back a sigh. At first, you were concerned. Even Kalim getting in a serious mess didn’t make him react that seriously. But then you remembered that there was one thing that could make Jamil call you out of nowhere, acting like in an emergency. Emergency only in eyes of few.

Bugs.

Jamil never admitted to you that he is scared of them, but every time you brought up the topis, he snapped his fingers at it, saying that insects just aren’t his favourite kind of animal.

“Hmm~ Maybe after I finish this chapter,” you said, conspicuously turning a page of the book you were reading and with all your will trying not to smile nor to look at the wincing expression Jamil was wearing.

“[Name],” he said, his voice shaking with anger or frustration. “Go there right now or I will make sure you won’t get today’s dinner.”

...No dinner?

“Yes, mum,” you said putting the textbook aside and getting up from the comfortable couch.

Of all people, Jamil is probably the only one—well, maybe also Trey—that could make those words sound dangerous. Like, no dinner made by the best chef in Scarabia? It would be pure agony.

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

6.   Have competitions.

“Aren’t you a little too good in this game?” you asked, regretfully placing pieces of the game back to the initial places.

He gave you a smile that slowly turned into a smirk, as you groaned at the next round you have lost. You flopped on the big pillow, all your will to play destroyed, as you sank between really cosy material.

“I told you I won’t give you a head start,” Jamil said, his steady voice mixed with amusement. “You even told me that you don’t want me to go easy on you before the game started.”

“Too bad,” you clicked your tongue at his response. “I was sure that after watching you play with Kalim, I remembered your tactics.”

You’ve watched at least eight rounds of Jamil and Kalim playing this game, and when it was coming to end, you were almost sure you understood and remembered the technique he was using in certain situations.

But, to your disappointment, it looked like he – even without using any of his tricky cards in his sleeve – was a wolf in sheep’s clothing, because, after three moves, you knew that probably all three were wrong when the opponent was Jamil.

“You gained nothing by it. Of course, I lost to him or... there would be a trouble,” he exclaimed. “You are different.”

“Oh, thank you. I can lose but he can’t, huh?” you frowned at him as he almost choked on the surprise he felt by hearing your response.

“...Yeah, that’s it. Just it.”

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

7.   Have study sessions together.

“One class had a test before us,” you said scrolling through your class chat group. “They said that there wasn’t any question about these dates.”

Jamil scribbled down years of the most important magic wars, from time to time looking at you who were listing some test exercises and feeling somehow unmotivated to even properly open a history book.

Your notebook was lying in front of you, today’s lesson topic on the top of the page and many detailed doodles on its margin.

Once again... what was the unit you are having an exam about?

“It doesn’t mean, we won’t get a question about that,” Jamil tried to convince you, sliding textbook your way. “Now, read that aloud, while I prepare notes.”

You blinked twice as if woken up from daydreaming. Were you daydreaming?

“Are you sure..? I mean, all I will do is reading. Wouldn’t you rather want us to read it silently and then share our notes after this?”

“Don’t think about it much. I really like your voice,” he said it so thoughtlessly you weren’t sure if said it as an unarguable fact or just his smooth talker abilities were showing off, “and gave me your notes for the last exam so we’re even. And you won’t do any good notes when you’re sulking over this exam like that.”

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

8.   Remind him to take breaks.

“You won’t get out of here,” you exclaimed spreading your arms as shielding a door from him. “Not a chance.”

Jamil stood a feet next to you, grimace stretching on his lips as he knew what’s coming up.

“I have to go, [Name].”

He tried to get through you, lightly removing you of his way. He wasn’t a fan of using force on anyone, and he was a hater of using force on you.

Much more than a speakable argument, you were pushing each other closer or further from the door, having a staring contest and reciting all the things he had done in the past two days; except for his daily duties and with the upcoming birthday party of few students of Scarabia who happen to have a celebration in the same day, the number of tasks he was given was overwhelming.

“Stop it!” you protested, trying to push him back. “I am seriously worried about you! Please... take a break.”

Every time he was coming closer to the exit, you stepped back, blocking his way, bumping into him and having to try again.

“You know I have a lot of work to do,” he said, finally stepping back and giving you a break from trying to separate him from the door. “I can’t just give up all my duties, even if I would love a break.”

“I can do it for you,” you quickly offered. “But please, now, go to sleep and don’t you dare touch anything related to school or cleaning.”

...What a weird request.

When was the last time anyone told him to take a break?

He doesn’t remember.

But now, he can say it was recently, all thanks to you.

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

9.   Promise.

It was really hard for him once all his hard work to keep a high position within the dorm students suddenly dropped after his overblot accident.

“[Name]...”

However, the thing he regretted the most was hurting you. Taking the whole dorm under his unique magic spell, the hypnosis also affected you, making you another servant of his. Even you weren’t the one he ordered a lot, you felt betrayed that even the friendship you two developed didn’t stop him from overblotting.

And if he knew that you would avoid him like fire after the accident, he would probably hesitate a lot.

His throat tightened as he saw you one day in the corridor, looking somehow lonely and tired. He dashed to you, beseeching you to talk to him.

“Sorry for asking, but, Jamil, you don’t hate me, right?” you asked with a pain in your voice. You couldn’t even look at his face, feeling the incomprehensible weight in your gaze. “I mean... Do you only act in front of me friendly? ...Like... with Kalim..?”

“No, no, no,” he protested quickly, making it almost sound like a plea. He gently grabbed your hands, praying that you won’t harshly jerk them back because of him. “I don’t hate you. I really like you. I mean every word I said to you.”

The feeling of release struck you like thunder, you took a big breath, your eyes watering. You slowly reached for his touch, finally ending in a hug.

Jamil ran his fingers through your hair, smelling a familiar, reassuring scent of yours. After a while, he whispered a question.

“So... could you please not avoid me anymore? I know it will be hard to bring up the same relationship we had, but... could you give me a second chance?”

“Okay. But under one condition,” you said, slightly backing off from him. Before he could wonder about the term you would require from him, you finished your thought. “You must be honest with me. I... don’t know what will I do if it all turned to be a play...”

“I will,” he replied, putting his whole heart in these two words. “I will always be honest with you. And won’t ever use my unique magic on you.”

You looked up at him, a small smile starting to rise and heart-throbbing more wilder with his words. “Promise?”

“Promise.”

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

10.            Make him confess.

“What are you doing this weekend?”

Jamil appeared in front of you, almost like popping out of nowhere, as you were done with today’s lessons and slowly heading to your dorm. He caught up with you, changing his pace to match yours.

“I have no plans. I will be probably sleeping or something,” you answered honestly, shrugging and reminding yourself that you should finally hang out with some people from your class to make sure your social life isn’t all over dead.

You were walking in quietly before Jamil broke silence and spoke up again.

“Would you like to go somewhere?” he asked his voice only giving a hint of nervousness—it was nothing compared to the stress he felt inside. It was just a “yes or no” question, he knew that he will meet in future many amazing people like you and shouldn’t be stressed, but having someone so dear to him being asked for a meeting where he will try to finally out find his feeling... it is stressful.

“Hehe~ what, are you asking me on the date?” you teased, but much more than mocking, you were hoping for an answer. For the honest answer, he promised you.

“...And what if I am?” he asked, his voice a bit hushed, but steady.

You felt how heat was coming all the way up to your cheeks, although you tried your best not to let anything more, as if a blush wasn’t obvious enough, know how excited and spellbound you are.

“Then, your wish is my command.”

[deluluass]

Then, the dam breaks.

Content warnings: rape/noncon; nsfw; dacryphilia; mild infantilization

Kuroo's not a bad person. 

Not even by a long shot. "Bad" is willfully stretching out a leg, hidden like a predator among the bushes; hungry for an unknowing soul who's naively secured with their surroundings and the crack that resounds when face finally meets floor.

Or, murder! Murder is bad, he believes.  

No, Kuroo isn't capable of any of those things. He might seem like he has a mean streak about him. What, with his sharp tongue and that incorrigible self-satisfied smirk (according to Yaku) and his words that may or may not sting like a backhanded slap sometimes. But that's all in good humor. 

Well-deserved, too, when given to the right asshole. And if he does manage to get under the skin of the wrong person, Kuroo's not above offering an apology. 

And he means it. (Occasionally.)

There's no pleasure to be had, if anyone would ask. Because, again , he's not a bad guy. He's sly: he knows that much, though he wouldn't taunt someone into visible pain just for the thrill of it.

There's a method to all this. A purpose. Not a profound one, but a reason all the same. 

So he has to admit he's feeling kinda lost figuring out why, of all people, it just really had to be you. 

There wasn't much of an option to begin with.

Art clubs had already been full. The other ones, you weren't much interested in. And by the time you realized your homeroom teacher would stop at nothing to remind you that this year was your last chance to do something other than study and prepare for exams, for once— well, it had already been too late to reconsider joining those.

Then a flyer was handed out to you.

"V-volley," the boy trailed off. 

Try as you might but you couldn't recognize him. A feat, that, considering his blond mohawk that you could spot among a crowd of thousands. 

He seemed like he'd caught a nasty spell that prevented him from meeting anyone's eyes, even as you deliberately searched his face for any sign that he'd explain himself to you. Surely, he must have a lot to say after he'd outright ambushed you from entering the cafeteria. 

"You...want me to join?" 

You were on the verge of asking for more details, focusing on the black cat (though it didn't look like it) drawn on the center of the curiously damp paper, only to find out that you'd been conversing with an empty hallway. 

A soft grumble left you. 

"Weird," you concluded, barely a whisper. "Weird, weird, weird ."

You were the volleyball team's manager since then. 

"She's not much of a talker."

Lev hunched to his knees again, sounding very much like he's running out of breath.

It should've been Kuroo's cue to gently ( gently) tell him off, that Nekoma's ace would handle a minute of catching a ball with their face with much more tenacity than he does, or that Nekoma's ace shouldn't have to catch the ball with their face in the first place, period.

" Zoning out already, Ace? " he'd planned on jeering, but instead he followed the direction of the overgrown 10 year old's gaze. 

Someone was talking to you. 

Apologizing , was more like it, if the other student's incessant bowing until his torso fell from his body was any indication. You were outside of the gym, clipboard tucked under an arm, so it was impossible to catch a word you were saying.

Not that you were saying much. Or anything at all. You only nodded. And nodded again. And after what seemed like the world's loudest "I'm so sorry, senpai!",you immediately went back inside to refill the water bottles lined atop the bench. 

"Hey," Kenma sighed, the ball in his hand aimed for a toss. "Focus."

And the cycle of Lev being an utter disappointment to the blond setter continued. 

Kuroo let out a noncommittal hum, eyes never leaving you, trailing like a lost pup as you handed out water bottles to Nobuyuki and the others. 

"Not a talker, huh," he muttered to himself. 

How long has it been? Two weeks? Three, maybe? Kuroo could scarcely remember for how many days you'd been showing up to this sweaty pit to perform your duties. On the dot. Always. Without fail. 

What he does remember was the first day.

Chin up; head held high. You strutted into their lives as if you were leading an entire militia to battle and had no time to waste.  

He teased you for it when you'd already busied yourself with clean up duty a few minutes after your (short) ( extremely concise) introduction.

("Slow down there, general," he told you with a wry chuckle. He expected any reaction from you, really.)

(He just didn't expect you to actually slow down on your cleaning and pick up on the Coach's remaining paperwork right then and there, going through it like a forest fire.)

It would take him a few more days to realize that that's just how you are. 

Even when you rejected a tongue-tied Yamamoto when he tried to ask you out. For a meal. With the other boys, of course.

Even when you took a hurtling ball to your leg and lost your footing and had the whole team scrambling for a stretcher, only for you to stand on your good leg, tell everyone "I'm okay," and walk to the nurse's office on your own.

(Kuroo doesn't think he's seen someone limp with so much grace before.)

His throat suddenly felt incredibly dry. 

Water . Water was what he needed. 

Right. 

You didn't see him coming from across the court. You were sitting on the bench and your back was turned, scribbling on that clipboard propped on your lap, yet— like clockwork, your idle hand shot out to give him the last bottle to your left before he could even finish asking for one.

He felt his lips curve as he muttered his thanks around the lid.

"Say," Kuroo began.  

You were reading the things you wrote back to yourself. 

"Mind telling me what was that about?"

You paused. You blinked up at Kuroo. 

The attention hits him like a freight train. 

That clear as summer sky gaze, unclouded and bright. 

It's nuts how unreal it felt. How can something so elusive be now all on him. 

(Just for him.)

"Earlier," he added, licking his lips and feeling silly for the way his chest tightened. "Seemed kinda intense."

"He borrowed my notes," you said. Then back to the clipboard again. 

Kuroo made himself comfortable next to you, elbow propped on his knee as he rested his chin against an open palm.

"Got a test coming up?"

"Cram school. He's in the same class."

Of course .

"Of course," Kuroo grinned. "What happened? Heard the guy apologize to you like you were about to kill him."

Laughter bubbled out of his chest. Unfortunately, you didn't seem to find it as funny as he did. Pity. 

He sighed.

"Nothing too bad, I hope."  

The noise of ballpoint pen scratching against paper halted. 

From way at the back, Lev was prattling Kenma's ear off again. Kuroo guessed they were about to leave, walking away from the court, away from the gym and to god knows where. The whole team, too, for that matter.

Everyone seemed to have gone, diminished in that second. He couldn't hear them anymore, didn't bother to see if they're still there.

He was looking at you, after all. Really looking at you. Your grip on the pen was a tad severe, he thought; fingers determined to squeeze the ink out of the barrel. 

Your face betrayed nothing. Indeed, anyone could spare you a glance and immediately guess that this is just another empty chat between acquainted individuals, conversation just for the sake of it. 

Kuroo wasn't just anyone, though.

Chin up and head held high; as you'd always done. But Kuroo's close enough to see it now, unlike before: the gulps you take in between breaths; the falter in those eyes that only ever looked forward.

Chin up and head held high, but Kuroo sees now that the neck he could easily break with one hand is so tense it's essentially a string pulled too tight that's on the brink of snapping. 

Oh.

"Oh," Kuroo whispered.

Oh .

"He lost it didn't he?" Kuroo realized. "Your notes."

And it did snap.

"Just..!" You looked down and bunched your pants in your fist. "No. Of course not. It's nothing," you huffed, putting the ball pen's cap back on. 

You were leaving.

Kuroo stood up.

"You look upset, manager-san," he said softly, his larger frame blocking your attempts of escape. "It is bothering you, hm?"

"My notebook got-got ruined, sure," you said. "But juice stains aren't bothering me, Captain ."

There it is. You were meeting his gaze again. 

" Too late for that ," Kuroo thought. There's a stutter to your words when there had been none. 

Your arms are trembling and you look  uncomfortable. He should stop. He knows he should stop , but whatever it is he said is chipping away at that impenetrable wall and he doesn't get what's happening now but damn, damn if that tingle running down his spine doesn't feel so fucking good. 

"My bad," he chuckled. "Sorry."

He raised both his arms in a show of defeat. 

"I'm- it's fine," you said through gritted teeth. "If you would just— excuse me."

Kuroo shrugged a shoulder. 

"Sorry about your notes, still," he said. "Must've been important to you. We all know how much you take your studies very, very seriously." 

Kuroo smirked. "You shouldn't have let him have it then." 

That made you stop in your tracks. 

"What do you mean?" you sought, confusion breaking your voice into what sounds like the smallest it's ever been.

Kuroo felt his breath catch in his throat.

"He needed my help, though," you rushed. "I can't just turn people away." 

"Really?" Kuroo sniggered, eyebrows lifting in fascination. 

"Could've sworn you were good at it," he said; whispered it so lowly, you couldn't have heard it. But you did.

You heard him, all right. Loud and clear.

Because it was just like watching someone take a bullet to the heart. 

First, the disbelief. 

Skin, muscles, and ligaments weren't made to be broken like that. A person wasn't created to bleed to death. And when it happens, well, all one can ask is: how could someone hurt me like this? 

So you stand before him, immobile, disbelief written in those wide eyes, because how could he hurt me like this?

Then—

Then, the dam breaks.

Kuroo doesn't think that you know it; that you're gaping at him with tears streaming down your face; that you're falling apart and stripping yourself bare the more you try to temper those quivering lips with that cute little nibbling you do.  

Kuroo doesn't think you know it, too.

That no one has ever been as beautiful as you are, right in that very moment.

You're not a good person.

Not even by a long shot. "Good" is an open hand, warm and soft and prepared to accept anyone in need of it. It's many things, goodness, but it most certainly isn't a dismissive attitude towards a well-meaning person who only wants to get to know you.

You hadn't gone this far in your uneventful life ignorant of what people say behind your back. "Frigid" is one. "Indifferent" on a good day. "Bitch" when someone feels like being mean. 

It's not like you're mad or anything; not as if you'd built up some sort of resentment within you that now you've settled for being perpetually friendless. You have plans, is all. You just can't afford to be a constant helping hand when you've got so much to do.

So you take it. 

Be a sport about it, was what you've always been told. Stiff upper lip, as they say. You remain silent about it and you endure and maybe you shed a few tears later as you lie in bed and maybe you entertain the possibility that you'll never see the end of this loneliness. 

But that's neither here nor there.

The point is, this time shouldn't have been any different.

(But sometimes even the strongest walls can crumble. All it takes is one crack, then the rest would follow.)

It was a bad day. 

You woke up late. You messed up the tally in the first set of practice games. You forgot the homework you'd stayed up all night to do. 

And the person whom you've lended your notes to for the college entrance exams lost it. 

He lost it. Conveniently just a month before the actual thing. 

"I- It's nowhere to be found, senpai," he explained. "I tried looking for it everywhere but- but I.." (You don't remember the rest.)

It's fine, you told yourself. You're fine. You can do something about a little inconvenience like this. You always have.

But then Kuroo Tetsurou asked. 

He's an amazing captain; even someone like you who only had a rudimentary knowledge at volleyball could understand the level of skill it requires to do what he does on the court while still managing to reign in the polarizing characters in this team together. And like most people, Kuroo Tetsurou has never cared for you. 

That's what you'd always thought, concerning him. Even when there had been times when he'd let slip what he thought about you. ("You're so cold, manager-san," he pouted once after you'd refused to eat with Yamamoto and the others.)

So it blindsided you, to say the least. 

The way he looked at you, as if he's privy to your darkest secrets, like he's seen you at your lowest and somehow knows you more than you did. 

When he'd jabbed and poked at what you'd only later realize was already a festering wound. (" It is bothering you, hm?" he said.) And before you could think about telling him to stop, to please, please let it go, it had already happened.

(" Could've sworn you were good at it ," he said.) 

This isn't news to you. Besides, there have obviously been worse digs. 

But hearing it from people who think you're not listening and being told about it to your face are two vastly different things. 

(Maybe it's because deep inside you'd always hoped that not everyone disliked you. That even though you're not a good person, you're not entirely bad either.)

Right in front of you, swift and without warning, he spoke only the truth.

You just weren't prepared for how deep it could cut. 

"I have to go," you murmured.

It took you a few seconds to realize that you'd been crying. And when you did, you immediately wiped your cheek with the back of your hand, turning away from him and the others still engrossed in their drills.

You let your feet do the thinking, allowing it to take you wherever they wished to go ( not here. not here. anywhere but here ), finding it impossible to do so yourself when your vision is clouded with welling tears. 

You moved forward, never once looked back, until you ended up inside the stark darkness of the gym's forgotten neighbor. 

The shed has long been abandoned and had nothing but dust, a couple of furniture in disrepair, and the occasional bug to keep it company. It was good enough for you. You didn't need much anyway.

Except for silence. 

The breaths that you'd desperately tried to control shook like dried leaves hanging onto frail branches, much like your legs, eventually collapsing at the slightest gust of wind. 

All you needed was silence.

Crouched down, the feeling of bones reduced to jelly was a lot more palpable. And despite the pins and needles that you know would eventually appear like a vengeful mistress, you stubbornly pressed your knees closer to your damp face.

Stuttering inhales and short-lived exhales  soon enough filled the gnawing emptiness of the shed as you count back to the moment you'd started the day to when your classmate told you that he'd lost your notebook to when you'd been told of how much of a shitty person you are and you wonder how you would've changed your decisions and how could it have gotten to this point how could it go wrong like this what did I do what did I do wrong what went —

"There you are."

You clamped your mouth shut, clenched your teeth so hard to stop their chattering. How useless. 

The creaking noise of the door being closed— punctuated by the sound of the latch clicking, rendered that effort futile. 

Kuroo Tetsurou locked the door.   

"C-can you," you panted. "Can you please leave."

"I need some time alone," you said, every beat of your heart like the ticking clock of a time bomb. "Please." 

You waited for him to do as you'd told. Maybe what happened earlier was a mistake, a slip of tongue that hurt more than it should've, and he's here to apologize. Of course. That's it, isn't it? Why else would he be here?

"I- If you want to say something, we can- we can— later." 

It was as if the entire world had gone still. He said nothing; neither could you hear any hint of movement. You turned around.

"C-captain..!"

He was right there. 

Right in front of you, crouched and staring right back at you. His face a hair's breadth away from yours. 

Your legs shot upwards. 

"What are you- ah !" You hissed, feeling every cell in your body being incessantly pricked. Finding it impossible to stand on your own, your hands scrambled to get a hold of something, anything, maybe the almost dilapidated table behind you— only to be caught in between large, strong arms.

"Careful, now," he murmured against your neck. His scalding breath like frostbite, chilling you down to your bones until you were numbed from the pain.

He slithered a hand around your waist. With blood thundering to your ears, you bit back a shriek and pushed him away with all your might. But have you forgotten? Despite that indolent swagger of his, you've witnessed how this boy pushes himself to exertion for each match and beyond. What made you think you could win against him? 

And when you attempted to open your mouth and yell, he effortlessly covered it with a palm while hauling you towards the table. The thing rocked under your weight. It is amusing, what the fear of falling does to you. One moment you're thrashing your way out; the next, you're holding onto your tormentor for dear life.

"No one's gonna come for you." He shushed you like how one would when placating a rabid animal. "You really believe they would bother? With an attitude like that?"

Down, down, his hand sank to your thigh, kneading the aching flesh until all you could do was mewl out a hoarse, "S-stop. I beg y-you."

Because it's all that's left for you. No one's going to save you. Or maybe someone would. But, who? And would they, really? 

(Go on, then. Try. See for yourself.)

"Kuroo-san," you whimpered. " S-stop ."

(Would they even believe you? It's your word against his. Him . Their beloved captain.)

"Tetsurou," he only said, dipping his hand lower, wrapping your freezing legs around him. "Say it."

He's everywhere. Lips tracing your chin, teeth grazing your throat; all the while your weak, pathetic arms stayed on his shoulders, thinking he'd regain his senses because he has to. He has to. He's not a bad person. He wouldn't hurt you, not in that way. 

Even when rough palms are already caressing the sides of your breasts and you feel a bulge rutting against your stomach, hot and rock hard and large, his hands grabbing your ass to bring your crotch closer to his—

"Cap- Tetsurou!" You cried, trembling hands back on his chest as you sobbed and pleaded please, please, let me go, I won't say anything, I-I'll keep quiet .

He did stop. But he didn't let you go. (You're a stupid girl if you think he would). Instead, with a forefinger under your chin and a thumb on your lower lip, he gently tilted your head to meet his gaze. 

And when your murky vision adjusted to the shadows, the heart that wanted to escape from your chest ceased its clamoring, arresting your breath with it.

The afternoon sun peeked through the crevices of the shed's wooden walls. Red-orange light revealed a pair of iris swallowed by blown pupils, only for it to pass and shroud him back into the darkness. 

"Say it again," he whispered, deep voice cracking. " Tetsurou . My name."

You tried to speak and protest once again but only a croaked snivel left you, your babbling becoming less coherent when he began planting soft kisses on both tear-streaked cheeks. 

"You've been all alone, haven't you? Keeping everything to yourself all this time."

He kissed your forehead and it was so tender you wanted to die. 

"My strong, brave girl," he breathed. "I'll take care of you. I'll take care of you. I- I-"

You heard him chuckle as he pressed his forehead to yours, felt it crease on your skin. "I love you."

No. No, no, no . You shook your head and closed your eyes and prayed to anyone who's listening. 

"I love you," he repeated, strongly now, as if he only realized it this time around. 

And then he kissed you. Just a peck. And then he kissed you again, deepening it to probe a wet tongue into your mouth. And the hand sitting lax on your neck felt like a gun to your temple.   

You remained just as you were, like a plaything to do with as he pleased, as you felt calloused fingers creep inside your sweaty shirt.

"Such pretty tits," he grunted as he raised your bra over your breasts to brush your nipples, rolling and pinching and pulling them with his thumbs.

He muffled the noises you made with his own mouth still when he continued fondling you. You soon enough tasted the salt off of his palm when he left your lips to lick and pepper bites on your neck, on the valley and mounds of your breasts, sucking and lapping the stiff peaks until he was satisfied.

You tried counting, one to whatever. And when that did not work, you tried biting your own tongue to rid of the heat you fear would burst in your belly. 

All that went to waste when he reached inside your pants. 

"Not- not there!" you gasped, breaking your silence and wriggling out of his grasp.

He cooed. "You'll feel good. I promise."

After hooking long fingers over the hem of your panties, he briskly parted the hair and lips underneath to pull the thin cotton over the folds, over the throbbing nub trapped in the middle. 

"Your pussy's so wet, sweetheart," he sighed, the tip of his middle finger drawing light circles on your clothed clit. 

It was so lewd and dirty and the fact that your panties were soaked with slick was enough to burn you with shame.

"You like it, hm?" 

Perhaps you whimpered out a meek "no." You couldn't tell anymore, heaving out while he continued to toy with a sore nipple as he rubbed your slippery cunt, preying on your puffed out, swollen clit.  

"Feel what you do to me." He squeezed your wrist and forced your shivering hand on his crotch. "Take out my cock, baby," he whispered, scattering kisses on your neck.

"Tet-Tetsuro…san," you cried. "I can- I can't."

"Yes. Yes, you can ," he said, not halting the ministrations between your legs. "You're a big girl."

As if held by a string, he guided you, wrapped his hand around yours as he— as you stroked him, scorching and thick, up and down, just like that . 

"Good girl. My good little girl," he groaned, parting your panties to the side to tease your dripping hole. 

You wept harder, the inevitable only a few seconds away from you. A single finger, at first. And when he added a second one, you realized you preferred having a hand on your mouth than his lips on yours.

(Because then you wouldn't have to think of an excuse why you're suddenly swirling and brushing your tongue in time with his.) 

For a while there had been nothing but the sound of two wet lips pursing against each other (along with those embarrassing squelching noises). 

He treated you as if you were made of porcelain, your plush walls stroked oh so gently as he circled the sensitive bundle of nerves. Even when he ended the kiss and removed your hand from his cock, spit and pre-cum connecting you to him, he still handled you as if you would break at the drop of a hat.

That's why it snuck up on you, what happened, after he brought his mouth to your ear.

"Don't scream," he whispered. 

Then, he rammed his fingers in your mouth. 

You tasted yourself as he forced you on your back, slamming you down on the dirty table yet still carrying your weight all throughout, never letting go.

The bitter acceptance of it— that what began earlier can only conclude to this , did not prepare you for the feeling when he finally thrust himself into you.

They say it shouldn't hurt at first. If it does then he's doing it wrong. 

You hardly know if it's relief or horror that dawns on you when you realize how he stretched you out so easily, despite his size. Because, by all means, this should be wrong. This is wrong. 

"Gonna ruin you," he panted. "Gonna ruin you and— fuck put you back together myself."

He grinded his cock inside you deep and slow and when he hit that spot you couldn't control yourself from jackknifing so hard he had to hold you down. He does this mercilessly, pace growing more delirious until you're nothing but a choked and sputtering fool around his fingers.

"I won't ever leave you. I’m here," he cooed, stroking your hair and kissing your face as you bawled and shattered in his embrace. "I’m here ."

"So cry all you want."

[httpsaiki]

Saiki with an s/o who just cups his cheeks and tells him they live him for the first time ever.

Hi! This is adorable, thank you so much for this request!! I did a story, not headcanons and it kind of got off track, but I hope you like it!

—

I went into way too much detail about cupcakes in this, I got carried away, oops. I'm back, though! After months I finally refound my love for this show and along with it my inspiration for writing! I hope this isn't too bad, I wrote it all in one go. I have been writing a personal project, but I doubt I've improved that much in the last couple months. Thank you if you read this! I hope to have more to post soon!

Reader is gender neutral!

WC: 1533

Italics represents Saiki speaking telepatically!

Saiki with a S/O who cups his cheeks and tells him they love him for the first time.

—————————————————–

Your week had been anything but easy. Balancing a school and social life wasn’t supposed to be easy, sure, but this was getting ridiculous. It seemed every assignment was due at some point this past week and every class had some sort of test or exam. On top of everything, your friend group decided it was the perfect time to meet up to study nearly every single day. It was completely and entirely exhausting. You hardly got a free moment to yourself.

To make matters worse, you hadn’t seen Kusuo the entire time. He was part of your friend group, yeah, but by some miracle, he managed to dodge every study session. It was almost like he had superpowers. On most weeks like this, Kusuo was the only thing that could get you through it, being around him was oddly healing - even if he’s a jerk about it sometimes, you miss him dearly. He had some sort of ability to keep you calm and content, just being around him was enough to relieve some of the day's stress. Kusuo was there for you no matter what, whether he was willing to admit that or not. You knew it to be true and he knows you know. That’s enough.

You could feel him rolling his eyes if you were to tell him anything you just thought, that is. That never stopped you, though, you needed to make sure he knows you care for him. No, care is not a strong enough word. You’re sure you love him, there’s no doubt in your mind. How can you go about telling him? He of all people definitely deserves to know he’s loved.

Plotting how you’d tell Kusuo that you love him turned out to be a fantastic stress reliever. Laughing all you want about the cheesy, made-up scenarios you come up with did wonders to calm you down. Anything from a mock proposal on the beach, to screaming it off a cliff. Most of them weren’t realistic, nor to either of your tastes. But they were fun, and that’s all that mattered. You finally decided on telling him the one way you knew he’d like best. Sweets. Content with your idea, you prepared for bed. Tomorrow couldn’t come soon enough.

You woke bright and early. So early, in fact, that the sun had hardly even began to rise. There was work to be done. Quietly, you made your way down to the kitchen, careful enough not to wake anyone up. You decided on a quick and easy breakfast, you could never go wrong with toast. While the bread was toasting, you got out cupcake trays and your cake recipe, reading it over and gathering any ingredients you need. You left any ingredients that needed to be refrigerated in the fridge but prepared measuring cups and bowls for them. Anything that didn’t need to be kept cold was put into the appropriate bowl - wet or dry. As you were measuring out the last of your dry ingredients, you heard a faint pop from the toaster and decided it was time to take a break and eat. Your toast was surprisingly good, probably because you felt you worked for it.

Now was for the easier parts, combining the rest of your recipe and then pouring it into the cupcake trays. You went about your day, waiting for them to finish baking and then cool down. Once they were cool, it was around lunchtime. The perfect time to finish them up with icing. Carefully, you took your time to write out “I love u Kusuo!” Putting each character on its own cupcake - unfortunately having to shorten the “you” so that it would fit on the 12 of them. To add a final touch, you added a couple small heart candies onto some of them. They looked great and you were proud of your work.

As soon as the cupcakes were packaged up and ready to go, you headed immediately out the door. Kusuo didn’t usually like when you showed up suddenly or unannounced, but you carried treats and an important message this time. You were sure he wouldn’t mind too much.

The walk to his house was uneventful as always. You were lucky enough not to run into anyone you knew on the way there. You didn’t want to have to explain yourself and a small part of you expected that running into somebody would only strike disaster - similar to the past week. There was a small skip in your step on the way there, happy to finally see Kusuo after that long, painful week. You didn’t let any of your nerves get to you. Kusuo would take your message well. He had to.

Or, that’s what you were telling yourself as you nervously stood at his doorway. Ringing his doorbell had never been so frightening. You braved it, though, and your finger found its way up to his doorbell. The muffled ring could be heard even from the outside and approaching footsteps that sounded awfully familiar came shortly after.

When the door opened you were greeted with the face you craved to see all week. He looked as unbothered as ever, but the second he stepped aside and his arm gestured to let you in you knew he was happy to see you. With a smile on your face, you went to step inside and-

Apparently, your awful week had yet to cease. Right as you walked in the door, towards Kusuo, your foot caught the bottom of the doorframe. You tripped on it, the box of cupcakes falling along with you. "Oh!” It came out choked and as if you hadn’t meant to say it at all, “No!”

You quickly peeked inside of the box. The icing writing you had worked so hard on was smudged, no longer legible. They were still edible, but the message had been erased. Kusuo was staring down at the cupcakes, an almost puzzled expression on his face. He kept the same expression as his eyes met yours.

“Sorry,” you apologized quickly, “they were for you, I didn’t mean to- to make a mess of them.”

Kusuo only nodded, but it was enough to tell you there was no problem and you hadn’t even needed to apologize. He wasn’t mad.

“Listen, Kusuo I,” you cut yourself off, now that the cupcakes weren’t an option how did you want to tell him?

“Screw it.” You muttered under your breath as you stood up from the ground, dusting yourself off. Now back on your feet, you quickly reached up, placing both your hands on Kusuo’s cheeks. Your thumbs found their way right on his cheekbones, running softly along them. The rest of your fingers could reach to his hair and you had to resist completely tangling them in it. His expression was entirely neutral once more, at the very least he wasn’t offended by your actions.

“I really love you, Kusuo.”

He smiled. He actually smiled. It was genuine, it was beautiful, everything you could’ve asked for and more. His hands were in your cheeks too at this point and he had an uncharacteristically intense look in his eyes.

“I really love you, too.”

Such a simple statement and yet you could feel your cheeks burning up from it. Even worse, his hands were on his face so he could feel it too. He was so close, still smiling at you. You’d never imagined his face was capable of making such a dopey, lovesick smile and yet here he is. And then he hugged you. Tight. He’d never held you like that before, it was so loving and warm. It hardly lasted a couple seconds, so short that you were almost sure you imagined it. As soon as you registered it, it was over, and Kusuo’s normal, unbothered expression remained on his face.

“We shouldn’t let your hard work go to waste, should we? Want to come enjoy these with me?” Kusuo moved down to pick up the box, staring down at them in admiration even if they were a mess by now. You didn’t bother to reply to him, still slightly in shock. You chose to simply follow after him into the other room as he placed the box on a table. Kusuo wasted no time in grabbing one of the cupcakes, his signature sweets-eating-face taking over as soon as he took a bite. It was endearing, to say the least. As if he sensed your hesitation, he nudged the box towards you, encouraging you to take one as well. Despite their state, they still tasted amazing, all your hard work really paid off.

The rest of the day was spent comfortably. You refused to leave Kusuo’s side after everything that happened. You took to ranting about your week and how much you missed him while sat comfortably next to him, right where you wanted to be. Maybe the past week was worth it. You finally got to tell Kusuo you love him and got plenty of time together to make up for it. It had been bad, but like all the times before, Kusuo had a way of making you feel better.

[five-rivers]

Danger First

Chapter 2

Heya @pocketramblr. I have no self-control.

.

Izuku expected his anxiety to subside, one way or another, once the exam was over.

As always, the universe set out to prove him wrong.

Home was more or less okay. But, for some reason, minor household repair issues started to bother him so much he spent the rest of weekend working on them

Then there was school, which was even more hellish than usual, despite being exactly the same as it had been since the sludge incident. Izuku was way too aware of how much of a threat everyone there was to him, specifically. Especially the teachers.

His hypervigilante state did keep him from getting poked (smacked) quite so much by the teachers, or cornered by 'fellow' students quite as much as usual, but it also led him to hide in the library storage room. He'd never be able to look at the librarian the same way again. Not knowing she kept multiple copies of books by anti-quirkless hate groups on hand.

And all through the week, he got nothing but silence from All Might.

But the end of the week came, and with it a letter from UA, which told him-

.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, FIRST PLACE?"

.

"I don't know, Nana, Banjo makes a good point."

"Don't take his side just because he was your predecessor. You all know a One for All holder would never resort to such devious- Yoichi, why are you making that face?"

"In an unjust world, bribery can be a tool for justice. I'm sure Eighth didn't have to, though."

"That's it, I'm not talking to any of you anymore."

.

"Anyway," said All Might, wiping blood from his mouth and glancing nervously at the other beachgoers. "Congratulations, young Midoriya."

Izuku felt his lip wobble. "You're not mad that I couldn't use One for All?"

"Not at all! Actually, in some ways this might be better. We'll have some time to experiment privately. And if you're in school when it finally turns on... well, we'll just say you're a late bloomer, alright?"

"Okay," sniffed Izuku, rubbing his eyes. "I just... I couldn't use it. What if-"

"Hey, hey, it's alright, my boy. No need to cry. You passed the entrance exam without using a quirk at all! You should be proud. Even with a quirk, it's an incredible accomplishment. Also, just so you know, I had nothing to do with the selection process. Just in case you were worried about favoritism."

Izuku sniffed and nodded.

.

"What a strangely specific denial."

"Uh, Banjo, usually I'd be reveling in the chaos, but I think Nana is seriously considering ghost murder right now. Maybe you shouldn't insult her kid anymore?"

"You and Hikage would protect me, right?"

"Don't take this the wrong way, but I'd sell you to Satan for one corn chip."

"So would I; it's been way too long since I've eaten. As long as it is Satan and not All for One, you've got my blessing."

.

"You certainly proved this old man wrong."

"You aren't old," protested Izuku.

"We'll have to agree to disagree on that," said All Might. "Here, sit down with me," he said, settling on the sand.

Izuku hurried to follow suit, and for a while, they both just watched the ocean. It was nice, today.

"I owe you an apology, young Midoriya."

"H-huh?"

"For what I said on that roof," said All Might, "and for what I... implied later."

"You already apologized for the roof, though?" said Izuku, confused. "I mean, that day..."

"That's what I'm talking about," said All Might. "I shouldn't have- The way I apologized, when I offered you One for All... It was like saying that you couldn't do it without a quirk, that you needed a quirk to 'fix' yourself and... well, obviously I was wrong. Quirk or not, you're going to be an amazing hero."

.

"Oh," said Banjo, "I can already tell this is going to be a problem once he finds out about Danger Sense. Gonna blow a hole right through his confidence."

"Maybe he won't find out?" suggested Nana, who'd wrestled her murderous impulses into submission. Temporarily. "Danger Sense is pretty low key."

"I feel like I should be offended..." said Hikage. "But if I got offended, that would be offensive to people who don't have quirks..."

"I don't know," said En. "If someone insulted your legs by saying they were so skinny it was like they weren't even there, would you being offended be offensive to people who don't have legs? Or would the original statement be the offensive one?"

"Somehow, I feel more offended after that."

.

"Oh," said Izuku. He felt himself crying again. "Are you, um. You're not going to- Are you- Do you want it back?" he whispered. "One for All?"

"No, no, of course not. You... There's no one I'd rather have it. I'm just... even if you didn't, you could be a hero. But I'm hoping... I'm hoping you'll keep it."

Izuku swallowed and nodded. All Might awkwardly raised his arm.

"Do you mind if I...?"

"Sure?" said Izuku, not entirely sure what he was asking.

All Might put his arm around Izuku and gave him a sort of sideways hug. Izuku leaned into it. It was the safest he'd felt since the entrance exam.

Because, surprise, surprise, that anxiety hadn't gone away.

"What did you say?"

"Oh! Uh... it isn't important, it's nothing."

"It didn't sound like nothing," said All Might, concerned.

"I, well, I, ever since the entrance exam... maybe even a little bit before? I've been really... jumpy? About everything. I think it's just because I'm a wreck, but..."

"Huh. Well, you know, that could be a facet of One for All."

"R-really?"

"After I got One for All, it seemed like it was easier for me to tell when people were in danger and needed help," said All Might. "S- A friend who knew about One for All used to joke it was my original quirk. But it was subtle and intermittent, not constant."

"Huh," said Izuku. "So... it might have been One for All all along? Trying to get me to help people?" He picked at his lower lip. "Maybe... I noticed a bunch of stuff I usually don't... I'm not sure I would have seen all the people in trouble during the exam."

.

"So much for not noticing-"

"His confidence... let him have it for at least a little while..."

"He seems to be taking it alright," said Yoichi, hopefully.

.

"I'm sure you would have helped them if you did notice, regardless," said All Might, "and that's what was really being measured, so my earlier point still stands."

Izuku nodded. "It would be really strange for a quirk to have two completely different applications like that."

"Yes, but One for All is a rather strange quirk, and I've seen odder split quirks." He fell silent for a moment. "I can't think of a way to test for it, though. Speaking of which, we should find some time to try and work on One for All before the school year starts. How do you feel about coming to UA after school?"

.

"Th-thank you for helping us with this, Recovery Girl!"

"It's no trouble, dear," said Recovery Girl. "I'd be here at this time, anyway. You wouldn't believe the amount of paperwork I have to go through. Just try not to break too many bones."

Izuku nodded vigorously, still somewhat in awe of being in the presence of not one but two incredible pro heroes. And at UA.

It was like living in a dream.

Except for the highly suspicious mostly-hidden wall panels and the very intense feeling of being watched through camera by an incredibly threatening being. It was fine.

"Alright, young Midoriya! Are you ready?"

"Y-yeah!"

"Then come at me, you zygote!"

.

Nana stared at her (former) student in despair. "Toshi... why... out of all the people..."

"So, you admit he can make bad decisions-"

"Bad and immoral are two different things."

"I think calling people zygotes is pretty immoral, actually..."

Silently, Nana agreed.

.

Izuku blinked at All Might- not because of the zygote thing!

... Okay, partially because of the zygote thing.

But mostly because he was still in his skinny, prone-to-coughing-up-blood form.

"Are you sure?" Izuku asked. "What if I..." he trailed off, blushing. What he was about to say sounded so stupid, and more than a little conceited, but...

"Hey, even like this, I'm much tougher than I look, young Midori- Ahem, I mean, zygote!"

"Toshinori, don't you think role-playing as Gran Torino is a little much?" asked Recovery Girl.

"Ah, do you think so?"

Recovery Girl shot All Might a truly terrifying look, but Izuku's mind was on something completely different.

"Is- is Toshinori your name?" he asked, awed.

Blood drained out of All Might's face, making him look more skeletal than usual. Should Izuku not have asked? Was it supposed to be secret? Oh no...

"Please tell me you haven't been training this boy for most of a year without him even knowing your name."

"Oops?" said All Might, faintly.

.

"He did do that, didn't he?" asked Yoichi, his eyebrows almost touching his hairline. "Nana, your boy is a disaster."

"All of us were disasters. We're still disasters."

"I'm not."

"Hikage, you spent most of your adult life living in the woods, completely isolated from humanity."

"I know, it was great."

"Unbelievable."

.

"Back to what we were talking about before," said Mr. Yagi (Mr. Yagi! Izuku knew All Might's name! And had permission to use it!) after Recovery Girl was done scolding him. "Focus on actually hitting me before worrying about accidentally hurting me. Today, I just want to get a baseline. Next time, we can work on basic punches and throws."

"So, do I just-?"

"Yep, just come right at me!"

.

The next hour consisted mainly of Izuku being thrown bodily into various padded surfaces. Despits this, according to Mr. Yagi, he was much better at dodging than expected. As a bonus, although he certainly felt sore and bruised, he didn't break any bones.

He also didn't manage to activate One for All. Not even a little bit.

Nor did he on any of the other days leading up to his first day as a student at UA.

.

Aizawa Shouta, down two nights of sleep and dreading the new batch of bright eyed hero hopefuls he'd be teaching- and crushing the dreams of- next week, glared blearily at a computer screen. Currently, it displayed a student's name, a quirk name, and the single least helpful quirk description he'd ever seen. Which was saying something, because he'd seen Hizashi's original quirk description.

Midoriya Izuku

Quirk: undetermined

Description: None.

I am either too tired or too sober to deal with this, decided Shouta. However, sleep simply wasn't on the table, and getting drunk was illogical. In that case, simply not dealing with it was the only option.

Nevertheless, he picked up his phone and called Nezu.

"Good evening, Aizawa!" said the internally chipper maybe-rodent. "Or should I say good morning?"

"Midoriya Izuku."

"Ah, you're browsing your class list, I see. Any thoughts about their potential?"

"Illogical." It would be, to make a call about a student's potential without meeting them first.

"Quite so!"

"Midoriya. Quirk," grunted Shouta, reminding him why he was calling.

"Ah, yes, he is a strange case. He's listed as quirkless in the registry."

That woke Shouta up, just a little. He'd seen a handful of documents for the quirkless over the years. If Midoriya was quirkless, his file should read N/A, not undetermined.

"What?"

"I have reason to believe that he might have been diagnosed in error," said Nezu. "I am still investigating. In the meantime, I would appreciate it if you kept an eye on him. Assuming, of course, that he isn't expelled!"

Shouta grunted and hung up. He minimized the window on his computer and pawed through his files until he found the entrance exam video for Midoriya.

A kid who passed the UA hero course practical entrance exam either entirely quirkless or with a subtle, stubborn, or invisible quirk on rescue points alone. A kid who seemed to run straight for danger on purpose (mostly on purpose, Shouta amended after seeing him collide with the invisible girl, coincidentally pushing her out of the way of some sort of water pressure quirk. There was just no way he could have known she was there). A kid who had almost certainly faced brutal quirk harassment since the time he was four and most likely possessed the self-confidence and trauma to match.

"Least he's good at dodging..." muttered Shouta. He rubbed at one grainy-feeling eye and pulled his sleeping bag closer around his shoulders. Kid wasn't all that bad at falling, either. Some light martial arts instruction, maybe?

He paused the video and reopened Midoriya's file, flipping to school and admission records and exam results. He usually didn't look closely at this part of the file, it was enough for him that the students passed, but, exceptions...

Speaking of exceptions, Midoriya's file was a mass of contradictions. Unusually high written test score that didn't correspond with middle school grades. Dozens of citations and black marks on his disciplinary record that should have kept him from even being invited to take the exam, but a letter of recommendation from All Might.

He frowned at the last one. There was no way...

He shook his head, and clicked on the link at the bottom of the file. It brought him to a herotube video about a year old. A hostage situation with a vaguely familiar middle schooler and slime-like villain. Also, a bunch of heroes, but none of them seemed to be addressing the suffocating child. Shouta felt his lips curl. Even if this was in the past...

Then Midoriya Izuku ran into the frame and tried to pull the other boy free, just seconds before All Might arrived and punched the villain so hard it started to rain. Then the video ended.

Alright, then.

Shouta's admittedly currently-less-than-razor-sharp mind presented him with two possibilities. One, Midoriya was All Might's secret child and All Might had bribed Nezu into letting him take the exams despite his less-than-stellar records. Two, this child had, with bloody fingernails, managed to claw a single spark of luck out of an otherwise bleak existence by impressing All Might enough that he got Nezu to ignore the otherwise damning records.

If the first, well, he had still passed the practical without use of any obvious quirk. He probably had some potential.

If the second... Shouta had been a hero long enough to recognize the circumstances that drove people to desperate, and sometimes unforgivable, acts. Dangling a single hope in front of someone only to snatch it away at the last minute...

Forget the maybe-quirk. This was the real conundrum of Midoriya Izuku.

The rat knew he wouldn't expel Midoriya with these stakes. It would be the height of irrationality.

(Even if he did turn out to be All Might's kid.)

What a pain.

He flipped through a few more profiles, quickly reviewing 1-B as well, before hitting redial on his phone.

"Calling again so soon?" asked Nezu with a squeaky chuckle.

"I want Monoma." He paused. "In my class," he elaborated.

"Oh? Whatever for?"

"If I'm going to have to figure out Midoriya's mystery quirk, I want to make it as easy for myself as possible."

There was silence on the other end of the like, and Shouta checked to see whether or not he'd hung up accidentally. He hadn't.

"I must say," said Nezu, finally, "I had not considered that solution. Depending on the mechanics of Monoma's quirk... I cannot think of any reason to deny your request."

That was a strange way of phrasing it.

"We'll exchange him with Bakugo, in that case."

"Not that I'm complaining," said Shouta, "but why him? Why not..." He racked his memory. "Mineta. He's got one of those body part quirks Kan likes."

Nezu chuckled again. "Normally, I would pick Mineta, but, by my calculations, a classroom that contained both Monoma and Bakugo would be demolished within thirty minutes of their arrival."

Shouta groaned. Why did they even let people like that in?

No, wait, he had an answer to that, actually.

"Forget a mouse, a dog, or a bear," said Shouta. "You're a sadist."

"Some certainly think so! But one thing's for sure! I'm the principal!"

.

The door to class 1-A sure was big... and intimidating... and radiating a faint sense of malaise. But, then, Izuku's middle school classroom had done far worse, so...

He opened the door. No Kacchan. Thank goodness. He must be in the class B, then, because there was no way he'd let Izuku beat him to school.

The strict boy from the entrance exam was there, though, and, oh, dear, he'd noticed Izuku and was coming right for him.

(Oh, gosh, and the invisible girl was here, too. He felt himself blushing furiously.)

Still better than Kacchan.

"Hello!" he said, rather loudly. "I'm from Somei Private Academy! My name is Iida Tenya!"

"Oh, uh, I- I'm from Aldera Middle School..." said Izuku. Was stating the name of your middle school a normal thing? He hadn't read about this in any manga... "I'm Midoriya Izuku."

"Pleased to meet you!" He moved his arm in a rather robotic fashion, taking a deep breath.

Oh, no, was he about to yell at Izuku again?

.

"Danger Sense isn't even going off right now, Izuku," said Yoichi, despairingly. "Why are you still so nervous?"

"Maybe we never really gave him Danger Sense after all, and it was his natural anxiety the whole time."

"Please stop denigrating my quirk."

.

"Midoriya... you... you perceived the true nature of the practical exam. Meanwhile, I was blind! I misjudged you! I hate to admit it, but you were the superior candidate."

Oh, that was nice, but... "I didn't perceive anything, though. I had no idea rescue points were a thing. I was mostly just trying not to die."

"Ah! That curly hair! It's Midoriya!"

"Oh! Um, Uraraka?" Please, please, let him have remembered her name right.

"Yeah!" said Uraraka, smiling brightly.

Augh! Too cute!

"I'm so glad you're in my class! I was so worried I wouldn't know anyone here."

"Y-yeah. T-this is Iida, by the way," said Izuku, trying to get attention off of himself.

"Nice to meet you, Iida."

"It's nice to meet you as well, Uraraka!"

"Yeah! So, we've got the entrance ceremony and guidance sessions today, right? I wonder who our teacher will be- They're all supposed to be pro heroes, right?"

"Um," started Izuku, "that-"

"If you're here to socialize, then get out."

.

"That's a teacher, huh," said Yoichi.

"Why are you saying that like you've never seen one before?" asked Banjo.

"I've seen teachers before," said Yoichi. "I've seen all of your teachers. The ones you've had while you had One for All."

"Okay, now you're saying that like you've never had teachers."

"Yeah, that is kind of strange, Yoichi," said Nana.

"I had professors," said Yoichi.

"Still weird."

"I went to college. And med school."

"Did you graduate?" asked En, interested.

"No."

"Why not?"

"My brother kidnapped me, kept me in a vault for a while, and then I died."

"I didn't know what I expected," said En, shaking his head.

"Wait, weren't there several years between the vault and the whole dying thing."

"Yeah, but I'm ignoring them."

"Because?" Banjo hooked his thumb over his shoulder at Second and Third.

"Yep," said Yoichi.

.

"Todoroki. You were the highest scorer on the Recommendation Exam. See how far you can throw this ball with your quirk. Stay in the circle. Anything else goes."

A boy with white and red hair stepped forward, scowling faintly. He took the ball and stared at it.

"Time is valuable, Todoroki."

And then there was a glacier.

Izuku felt his jaw drop. How was he supposed to compete with that?

.

"My name is Monoma," said a blonde boy, offering his hand.

Izuku stared at it a moment before remembering handshakes were a thing.

"Midoriya," he said.

Monoma then offered his hand to Uraraka and Iida as well. "I look forward to experiencing UA's superior brand of education with you," he said.

Izuku laughed nervously. "You're confident," he said, glancing at the track where two others students were doing sprints. It would be their turn soon.

"But of course!" Monoma struck a sort of pose, fingers splayed out on his chest. "I welcome this sort of challenge, this opportunity to prove myself! It just goes to show, UA only accepts the best of the best!"

Monoma was called away to the starting line a moment later. "Two good, one dud," he mumbled under his breath.

What did that mean?

Then Monoma was at the starting line, and he was using Iida's quirk. Did he have a copy quirk? That was so cool!

... Is that what he meant by good and dud? Did he... did he see that Izuku didn't have a quirk? Oh, no... What if he told everyone? Even if people were being nice to him now...

"What's wrong?" asked Uraraka.

"U-um," said Izuku. "Nothing?"

.

"Oh, gosh," said Yoichi, crying. "I just want to wrap him up in a warm blanket. You deserve friends."

"Yeah, kid, it'll be okay," said Banjo. "Bakugo's just a freak. And so was your whole school. Place gave me MLA flashbacks."

"Sure glad they aren't around anymore," agreed En.

.

All in all... Izuku didn't do terribly. Especially given that he didn't actually have a quirk, and this was a quirk assessment. At least, he didn't think he did. At least, he hadn't tripped or hurt himself.

It had, in fact, been a rather good day. No Kacchan. No bullies. The teacher had clear standards and requirements, and he stated them up front.

He had been getting... bad vibes... from the short, purple-haired kid, and he'd noticed other people frowning at him, especially the girls. But he hadn't been able to put his finger on why, even though he had been watching him carefully during his turns.

Other than that...

UA really was the best.

"By the way, no one's getting expelled. It was a logical ruse."

Monoma raised his hand.

"What is it?"

"I must object!" said Monoma.

"You... want someone to be expelled?"

"In fact, I insist! To allow this to continue would blemish the reputation of the school."

"Well said, Monoma!" exclaimed Iida. "Living up to the reputation of UA and all the alumni who have come before us is a duty of us students! But what blemish are you talking about? Surely, as Mr. Aizawa said, we all went plus ultra!"

"Maybe so, but my concern has more to do with moral standards!"

"If you kids keep going like this, I'm just going to go to sleep. You're giving me a headache."

Izuku caught movement out of the corner of his eye, and a wave of unease went through him. He turned to see-

"Hey! What are you doing?" he demanded, shocked and more than a little horrified.

Once again, he was mortally embarrassed on behalf of the invisible girl.

"I wasn't doing anything!" said the small purple boy.

"You were looking up her skirt!"

"It isn't like there's anything to see!"

The invisible girl gasped and quickly moved away. "Gross!" she said. "That's terrible!"

"See? See?" said Monoma, wildly. "This is what I'm talking about!"

"Next time," said Aizawa, "get to the point faster. Time is valuable. Mineta."

"What?"

"You're expelled."

"What? You can't do that!"

"Go complain to Nezu."

UA really was the best.

"Midoriya."

Okay, never mind. He was doomed. Completely doomed.

"Monoma. I want to talk to you after class. The rest of you are dismissed."

Midoriya stood nervously as Uraraka and Iida bid him goodbye. Was this it? Was Aizawa going to expel him after all? At least it wasn't in front of absolutely everyone... But what was Monoma doing here?

Speaking of which, Monoma looked nervous, too... Was he okay? Surely, Aizawa wasn't going to expel him, too.

"Is this about me using other people's quirks?" demanded Monoma. "Because you said anything goes! I wasn't cheating. You can't expel me!"

Oh. There was some trauma there. Izuku could tell. Did people make fun of him for his quirk?

"I'm not going to expel you," said Aizawa, looking up at them from where he laid in his sleeping bag in the grass. He almost looked like he was praying for patience. "I need to ask you some questions about your quirk. For future reference and to better serve your needs as a student. I know how tricky meta quirks can be."

"Oh," said Monoma, slightly deflating. Then he sent a curious glance at Midoriya. "Is he-?"

"His matter is slightly more sensitive. If you would like me to send him away while we talk, I can do that."

"No, no, it's fine." Monoma sniffed, his eyes suspiciously wet. "What's the question?"

"You copy quirks through DNA contact. Do you decide when to activate passive quirks you copy, or can you choose?"

"I can choose, as long as it's within my time limit."

"When you first make contact, can you tell what quirk a person has?"

Monoma shook his head. "No, sir, I have to activate it to do that, so I can get duds- oh, that is to say, quirks I can't use because I don't have the proper activation conditions, like Midoriya's. He's got some kind of stockpile. I can get duds without realizing it. But I can tell whether or not someone has a quirk."

"Were you able to test all your classmates' quirks today?"

"Not everyone, yet," said Monoma. "I usually try to avoid more extreme mutation quirks outside of controlled conditions."

Aizawa's head bobbed up and down minutely. "Great. That should be enough for now. You're dismissed."

"Yes, sir! I look forward to seeing your superior lesson plans tomorrow!" He paused. "Midoriya."

"H-have a good day, Monoma."

Monoma had felt One for All! What a relief. Izuku had been half worried he'd lost it somehow.

But why did Aizawa want him?

"Um, sir?" he asked. Sort of asked. 'Sir' alone wasn't a question, even if it was said in an inquisitive tone.

Aizawa's eyes turned red, and his hair started floating. Izuku felt... Huh. Calmer, somehow? He was no longer vaguely aware of how the light post over there could fall on him, or any of the other many minor dangers surround him and oh, gosh, he was no longer aware of the dangers! How was he supposed to stay safe like this, when he felt like he'd been blindfolded?

Aizawa blinked. Everything came back.

"Wow," said Izuku. "That was so cool! Was that your quirk? Is it an emotional quirk? It made me feel calmer at first, but then I was, I don't know, too calm, and it made me anxious, but then-"

"Problem child," said Aizawa, and Izuku froze at the reprimand. "What I just did was erase your quirk."

Erase?

His quirk?

"Oh my gosh! You're Eraserhead! I'm a huge fan!"

Aizawa closed his eyes. Was he counting? No? Did he fall asleep?

"You do know you're listed as quirkless, right?"

"Yes?"

"But you just had a reaction to my quirk that a quirkless person definitely should not have."

"O-oh?"

"Combined with Monoma's ability to sense your quirk, I'd say you are not, in fact, quirkless."

"But I have the toe joint?" Izuku wasn't sure why he'd said that. He shouldn't be arguing against this, because, as Aizawa had said, he did have a quirk. It just wasn't exactly his.

"Yeah, that's an old wives' tale."

"Really?"

"As real as my quirk counselor license. Whoever diagnosed you was a quack."

"O-oh."

"My initial impression from your entrance exam video is that you might have a sensory quirk of some kind. On the other hand, we should take Monoma's assessment into account, and consider stockpiles. Either way, I would like to schedule some time to test things out with you."

"You- You'd do that? For me? I mean, I don't want to be a bother-"

"This is literally my job."

"It... yeah, I guess so." His previous teachers would have considered it a bother. Except Mr. Yagi, but Mr. Yagi wasn't really a teacher. He was more of a... a mentor.

(Or a dad.)

(Oh, no, he did not just think that. Bad. Bad brain. Bad brain that read too much All Might RPF as a pre-teen.)

"Besides, even if your quirk doesn't have many applications in hero work, it will be useful for you to know what it is and how it affects you." Aizawa yawned. "Also, don't tell your class that I'm Eraserhead."

"O-okay," said Izuku. "Of course, sir, but... why?"

"I have two full time jobs. I get my entertainment where I can. You can go now. We'll schedule tomorrow."

Izuku nodded, and Aizawa just... zipped his sleeping bag the rest of the way closed and rolled over.

Was... was he just going to go to sleep here? In the middle of the field.

"Um? Mr. Aizawa?"

A grunt came from the sleeping bag.

"This is... isn't this kind of a dangerous place to sleep?"

"Go home, problem child."

"... okay."

[sincerelylaurel]

How to Be More Efficient As a Writer

source: me <3 (@writingwithacutlass ) please don't copy/repost without permission! :)

hi people! i'm alive! i think! school has been really stressful and time-consuming but midterm exams are over and i have a 3-week break so hopefully I'll be able to post more consistently during that time. moving on from the little life update— here are some tips to help you write more efficiently! i use these methods myself all the time too!

writing sprints

Writing sprints can be a very efficient way to write quickly in short periods of time. Set a timer for anywhere from 5 minutes to half an hour, and write continuously until time is up. Even if you don’t know what to write, write down everything you can find in your mind. You can always take out unnecessary bits later. These sprints can be stressful but they also force your creativity and inspiration. Set attainable goals for yourself, both long-term and short-term!

routine

Create a routine that works for you. If you are most productive from 8pm to 10pm, use that time wisely. Of course most of us have schoolwork and other priorities, so complete the most important responsibility during that time. You might have time left to write, but you probably won’t so you have to make time yourself. Use all your little slots of free time, such as bus rides, to write. Time isn’t gonna make itself, so you have to do it intentionally.

use an outline

Have an outline to guide you as you write. Even pantsers should have some form of outline to guide their story. You’ll need to know the beginning and ending of your story. If you think you’ll be okay without one because you’ll remember it, no you won’t. Write every single detail down somewhere. This includes scene ideas, character details, and important plot points.

don’t edit as you write

This is a common “fatal flaw” when it comes to writing efficiently. Editing as you write slows you down so much, and isn’t actually productive at all. You just get stuck in the same few chapters forever because you’re constantly editing the same few scenes. You’ll be unmotivated to write and won't get anything done. Remember you can edit in the second draft!!

write out of order

Although you shouldn’t wait for inspiration to strike before you write, you should make the best of it when it does happen! Got a random boost of inspiration to write a scene that happens 5 chapters after the chapter you’re currently at? Go ahead and write it. You don’t have to write chronologically! Write scenes whenever you want to and piece them together later.

take care of yourself

The most important key to becoming a more efficient writer is being able to take care of yourself. Do not overwork yourself. This will only lead to burnout and writer’s block, and you don’t know how long it’ll last. Give yourself some space and rest. Let yourself enjoy other hobbies. Writing is not meant to be a chore (unless it’s actually your full-time job, but even then don’t overwork yourself)! If writing has a negative impact on your health, step away from it and focus on yourself for a while <3

[awkwardgtace]

Testing Boundaries

More for the new brothers. Sadly can't write much happy for them yet. I'll try though.

Testing Boundaries

It had been a few weeks since Ian found out Mik was a human, or well Mikl said he was a sizeshifter. Ian felt a bit weird about everything honestly. He had never expected to see anyone else his size again, let alone a human he thought he could trust. Mik was spending a lot of time his size to help him too. It felt like he was cared about, it felt nice. Now he just wished he trusted Mik as a human a little bit more. He didn’t think he’d do anything bad, but a part of him didn’t want to fall for any tricks like he did with the bad human.

All of that weighing on his mind, Ian started testing boundaries. He was going as far as he could in every way. He was ignoring Mik when he’d call for him. He was borrowing food and supplies instead of asking or taking what was left out. He also knocked things down he knew wouldn’t matter. Overall just being a lousy borrower and maybe a lousy brother, although he pushed that thought away. He just needed to see what would happen if Mik actually got mad. It probably wasn’t his best idea, but really he hadn’t had anyone around long enough to think of better methods. He was more encouraged when Mik stopped getting to his size.

Nothing was making Mik angry though. Ian had tried pretty much everything, so he knew he had to step it up. Mik spent a lot of his human size time sitting at the desk in his room. Ian knew this would be where he could finally find out how Mik would act when angry. He climbed up and started looking for something to steal or mess with, anything that didn’t seem super important. He saw some papers that didn’t look like when Mik left notes. Ian couldn’t actually read what the paper said, he hadn’t been taught how. If Mik didn’t act differently after this, maybe he could ask him to help him learn how. He grabbed one of the smaller pens Mik kept on the desk and started to draw on the papers. He was focused on his task when he heard the bedroom door hit the wall. He looked at it with wide eyes, holding his breath as he met Mik’s eyes.

Mikhail hadn’t had an easy week. Ian was leaving messes all over the place, which Mikhail had to clean up. Ian had refused to come out when he was human size too. It didn’t help that he'd put off a usual assignment that involved a dinner here. He didn’t want to bring humans home when Ian wasn’t even aware it could happen. He settled for an early exam, which he’d have to spend all day grading. At least once that was over he could try to find Ian and talk to him, maybe have him stop acting out and avoiding him. At least he hoped he’d feel relaxed enough to shrink down.

He sighed as he opened the door, wincing when the door slammed on the wall. He didn’t even realize he’d put that much power into opening it. He sighed eyes drifting towards his desk, freezing when he noticed the small form there. He was going to speak, until he noticed the pen being held tightly and the ruined exam on the desk. Mikhail was finally angry at Ian. He wasn’t sure why Ian was doing this, but he couldn’t tell if it was the answer sheet or a student’s exam. The kid had been through a lot, and Mikhail tried to understand, but this was a step too far. Mikhail tried to calm down, taking deep breaths, but felt himself shoot up a few inches. At this point, staying in the house would make things worse. He stalked over to his desk, trying not to react to Ian’s trembling.

“Off the papers,” he growled. Mikhail didn’t have any patience right now. He’d take the papers, stick them in his car then go calm down. He’d probably deal with grading them in his office at the university. Ian scrambled back, clearly terrified of his currently human sized brother. Mikhail hated seeing him scared, but he wasn’t calm enough to talk with him right now. Mikhail barely softened when he saw that it was only the answer sheet. He grabbed the papers once Ian was off of them and quickly left the room. He grabbed his bag and shoved the papers in with little care. He grabbed his keys and left, wincing a bit when the door slammed as he walked out. He needed to cool down, after he graded the exams he’d talk with Ian about everything.

Ian was terrified. Mik had never looked at him like that before. He might have gotten bigger too, which made it even worse. Mik took the papers, was he even going to come back? The first time the bad human got mad like that, he came back with a more secure cage. Maybe Mik left to get a cage...no, no, Mik wouldn’t do that. Mik just left like when he went to that school place. He’d be back like normal, Ian would apologize and things would be fine again. Ian was tempted to just stay here and wait, but he didn’t feel safe enough for that. He made his way back to his home in the walls, curling up on the bed they’d made there. Mik would be back and they’d talk.

Ian slowly opened his eyes. He couldn’t remember falling asleep. He slowly made his way out to the human bedroom, but it looked like earlier. That meant Mik hadn’t come back. Ian felt tears pricking at his eyes, he must have made Mik really angry. He went too far and Mik wasn’t going to come back. He climbed on to Mik’s human bed, curling up on one of the pillows there. Mik had said this could be a bed out here for now. In case Ian got scared, he had a place that was his out here. It was nice to have somewhere he fit in Mik’s human room. He started to cry, curling up tighter and hugging himself. Mik had to be coming back, Ian would probably be all right if he came with a cage too. At least he still had someone there.

Mikhail had fallen asleep in his office while grading. He’d calmed a lot after getting here and decided he’d finish the papers then go home to talk with Ian. He wanted to give Ian his full attention to solve this. He had meant to be back sometime around midnight, but when one of the janitors knocked on his door in the morning, his blood ran cold. He rushed out with a quick thank you and to enjoy the weekend on his way. He had to get home and check on Ian, he’d left so angry, he felt like an idiot. He shouldn’t have let it get to him, Ian is just trying to figure out things. Ian couldn’t have known he was stressed, or that the paper was important.

He was rushing home when a thought popped into his head. Going home and talking wouldn’t solve the issues. Ian had gotten worse when he couldn’t shrink down, but when he was stressed it took a lot to stay human sized at all. He drove past a store when he got an idea. Maybe he could show Ian that even when Mikhail was human sized, he still mattered. He pulled him quickly, hoping they had what he wanted.

Ian had fallen asleep on the pillow. It was wet where his head was, he must have cried a long time. The sun was up and Mik still hadn’t come home. He wanted Mik to come back. He shouldn’t have written on the stupid paper. He curled up tightly again just staring into space. He couldn’t bring himself to go anywhere this time. He could stay here and pretend Mik had left the pillow out for him last night. He figured this time he’d go to sleep by choice, closing his eyes and hoping he’d wake up and the last day was a dream. Then the front door opened.

He froze, he wanted Mik back, but he might also still be mad. He should hide until he knows, but then Mik might leave again. He couldn’t decide what to do, fresh tears pricking his eyes. He didn’t know what was better, he didn’t want to be left behind even if it meant Mik became a bad human. He had barely decided when he heard the door crash into the wall again.

“Damn it,” Mikhail whispered. He wasn’t being careful, he was too focused on the image of Ian curled on the desk scared in his mind. His eyes focused there first, almost relieved he didn’t see the boy curled up. He looked around the room, hoping for a sign and almost missed the small boy on the pillow on his bed. He rushed over falling to his knees, relieved he was even still here.

“Ian, buddy, are you awake?” Mik’s soft voice surrounded him. Ian was too scared to move. He came in angry like when he left, he didn’t want to be punished. He felt a warm hand cup around him, and he yelped. “It’s ok Ian. I’m so sorry I left like that. I didn’t mean to be gone all night, I fell asleep working in my office. I was angry and wanted to get the work done so we could talk this weekend.”

Ian slowly looked up at Mik. He didn’t look like he was lying, but the bad human hadn’t at first either. This was Mik though, maybe he could believe it. He sat up and inched away from the hand that had settled near him. Mik frowned, but didn’t move to touch him again. Ian hugged himself, waiting for the punishment about the papers. He was happy Mik was here, but he knew better. Mik couldn’t just be back and not angry anymore. There had to be something coming, right?

“Buddy, give me a second all right? I stopped at a store on the way home. I got something for you.” Mikhail went back out to his car, making sure not to shut the doors. He didn’t want Ian to think he’d left again. He grabbed the box, a silent prayer to anyone that this would help. There had been a lot of options, but this had the best layout for their situation. First he’d talk about how Ian has been acting then show him the gift. He moved carefully going back inside, shutting doors quietly. Ian was on the pillow shaking. Mikhail almost dropped the box, clearly this had been worse than he thought. He sat down on the ground in front of the bed, placing the box to the side.

“Ian, buddy, why are you shaking?” he whispered. Ian just seemed to get smaller. Mikhail felt guilt eating at his heart, what happened while he was gone? He saw Ian try to look at what he’d carried in and things clicked. His eyes went wide. “Oh, oh no, Ian. Ian, please look at me. God I’m an idiot please buddy.”

Ian was scared, he didn’t want to see what Mik brought. He knew Mik was better than the bad human, but he could be like them if he wanted. Ian slowly turned to face him, hugging himself tighter. Ian looked into Mik’s eyes. He looked...sad, guilty maybe. Ian stopped shaking, confusion overtaking his fear. He watched as Mikhail’s face shifted to something he couldn’t quite understand. Ian wasn’t sure if it was a good thing, but didn’t look away. He watched as Mik reached down next to him picking up the box.

“W-what’s that?” he asked. He meant to stay quiet, but he couldn’t keep his curiosity under control. He didn’t want to hear Mik tell him he bought a cage. He saw Mik smile wider making a shiver go down his spine. This was what he wanted though, wasn’t it? For all the pretending to stop. He had almost believed it wasn’t pretend though.

“Well, I was trying to think of something to help with how things were going with us recently. So I picked this up on the way home. What do you think?” There was a long pause and Ian wasn’t sure why. “Buddy, I can’t really get your opinion with your eyes closed.”

Ian didn’t realize he’d shut his eyes again. He swallowed thickly, then slowly opened them. He could barely process what he saw in front of him. The box showed a house, with open doors, but the roof was taken off. It seemed like it had only one floor and a couple rooms to it. It looked just like a small house. Ian sat there staring, he couldn’t believe this was what he was being shown. Shouldn’t it be a cage? He had been causing so much trouble. Isn’t that what Mik meant?

“I wanted to get something for now, we can pick out a nicer one online later. After how things went this week, I thought you might feel better with a spot out of the walls that’s your own. I’d meant to spend some more time picking out the first one, but after yesterday I thought it would help. So I stopped and grabbed this” Mik moved the box up a little, looking away. Ian couldn’t believe this was real, it was a present for him.

“W-why?” Ian asked. “A-aren’t you mad at me? F-for how I was acting”

Mik put the box down again, then placed his arms on the bed with his head on top. Ian stepped back a bit, falling on the uneven surface. He saw Mik’s green eyes filled with something he couldn’t understand. Is this where he finally found out the truth? That the house is for when he’s good or something.

“Ian,” Mik’s voice was serious, “even if I’m mad nothing bad is going to happen. I’m not going to hurt you, maybe take the TV away or something, but nothing you need. I definitely won’t take your freedom away. You thought I’d brought home a cage didn’t you?”

Ian shrunk in on himself while nodding. Mikhail couldn’t blame him. The human left angry then came back with something for him. He felt stupid, he hadn’t considered how that might sound. This wasn’t going to be an easy adjustment for either of them, but maybe this could reassure him at least. Mikhail slowly pulled his hand out from under his head and reached toward Ian. He moved slowly, giving Ian ample time to tell him no or show discomfort. He wouldn’t push anything right now. As his hand got closer he saw Ian flinch. He stopped and just left his hand where it was.

“Ian, I told you, you can set the rules for how we do things. I’m not able to get your size right now or I would, I know that makes this easier.” Mikhail hated when his emotions ran high. He wanted to make Ian feel better right now, and human height isn’t helping. Ian didn’t seem to react. Mikhail tried to think of what he should do. He could just leave him in the room on his own. Although they still had to talk about the messes and the papers it could wait. “All right bud, I’ll lea-”

“W-wait,” Ian called out. “C-can we set up the house?” Ian watched Mik’s face soften, a warm smile forming.

“Of course, where were you thinking?” Mik asked. Ian looked away, unsure how Mik would feel.

“C-could we put it on the table there?” he pointed to the nightstand Mikhail had put the pillow on the night Ian had told him about his past. His eyes went wide, but he looked at Ian warmly.

“Sure, just let me know if you ever want it moved,” he said. Ian felt a sense of relief come over him. It wasn’t only all right he wanted to stay near Mik, he could change his mind. He moved closer to the edge of the pillow so he could watch Mik open the box. He pulled out the house that looked like it would take up the whole table, and a roof that was separate. Mik placed the house on the table then carefully put the roof on top. He inspected it for a second before pulling the roof off again and turning back to Ian.

“All right, so here's the more fun part,” Mik said. “It comes with a bunch of furniture to put inside, if you want to head over I’ll put down each bit as you tell me. Just need you hanging out in the house so you can tell me where it all goes.”

Ian jumped up, more excited than he expected. Only to lose his footing on the pillow again. He fell forward this time, and completely off the bed. He closed his eyes expecting the hard floor, but landed on something warm. He opened his eyes and saw Mik staring down in concern. Mik didn’t say anything though and carefully held his hand up to the table so Ian could climb off. The two spent the rest of the day setting up Ian’s house.

They did talk eventually, but Ian stayed in his house and Mikhail sat looking in from the floor. Mikhail couldn't help the smile he had that Ian was talking while he was human, they’d figure this out.