#i really liked the starter i got too
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anyways i appreciate that pokepark 2 gives you oshawott as a friend before the other starters. its like sort of a consolation for how most gen 5 adaptations and spinoffs treated the oshawott line like dog shit stuck to a shoe
#i love all three unova starters but oshawotts always been my fave. too bad tpci apparently didnt feel the same way#its definitely better in later years tho w hisuian samurott#am i crazy or was oshawotts treatment like. beta pre-release popplio hate#it wasnt AS bad as that obviously#but i distinctly remember people despising oshawott and saying it was the stupidest starter#and the anime followed suit with how it treated ash’s and didnt spotlight dewott or samurott positively often#and the manga straight up refused to give any of the FOUR protags a samurott. for some reason. wtf#like wtf. maybe thats why i was drawn to popplio and it overtook oshawott as my overall fave eventually#theyre kin to me. family.#echoed voice#actually ik tepig also got a ton of shit. rip my baby hes also really fucking good and ppl were mean as hell#unfortunately you get him last in this game. ah well
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#once again thinking really really hard about making plushies#I think I got overwhelmed trying to pick a decent starter sewing machine and just gave up lmao#it felt like too big of a commitment for something I wasn't already doing......#maybe I should start by making some dumb little hand-stitched things so I can be like 'ah right this IS fun but doing it this way is a pain#'gosh I WONDER what would make the whole process easier and faster........ 🤔'#sometimes playing mind games with myself is the only way I get anything done lmao
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thank you @kaunisbaby @demon-fae @because-its-eurovision and @ss4nni for tagging me 🥺💗
instructions: on pinterest, search [your name + core], post 6 pictures and tag 6 people
...alas I have a stupid-ass name and couldn't get enough results for my first name to compile a moodboard I'd want to post, so I made one with my URL instead (which was kinda of a struggle as well, how the fuck did y'all get such cool pictures?! 😭)
tagging anyone who hasn't done this yet and wants to ✨
#in case you're curious about what i got for my first name:#for starters there was a total of 21 results. like. 21 pictures and that's it. so not a whole lot to choose from anyway 🤡#some of them seem to be random ads#six of them are workout related#three pictures from twilight for some reason :D#(and no my name's not in twilight as far as i can tell)#two dark foggy pictures#two pictures of anya taylor-joy#(again: no my name is not anya or taylor or joy or anything resembling any of those names in any way?? :D)#two random science graphs idk#a picture of sai pallavi (an indian actress apparently)#a poorly drawn picture of a house and a text 'i hate going home' (as if drawn/written by a child)#a pink glittery skeleton taking a selfie (the only pic that was kinda cool lol)#and finally a picture of rainbow moonstones. pretty cool actually but the picture is boring#so yeah. naturally i'm taking this way too personally and am now close to tears#because my name's so useless and stupid disgusting that one can't even make a cool moodboard out of it 🤗#(i'm fine really lol i'm just on my period that's all. i do think my name is stupid though 😪)
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I never realize how unevenly pigmented my skin is until someone has to put me in makeup lol
#like for starters i'm already pale as fuck. like so pale i'm basically translucent and you can see all my veins#but then there are these blotchy areas around my eyes and mouth that are even paler#it's really subtle so it doesn't matter a whole lot. but when you're trying to color match it definitely complicates things#and then i've got these patchy little freckles across my nose and cheeks. also hard to notice unless you're way up close#but anyone putting me in makeup is way up close. and very quickly starts wondering why i look so flat when they're colormatching at first#and at first i look really pink/red but when you actually try to match my skin tone i'm so blue undertoned i look undead#so it's just. an experience for anyone trying to match my skin tone for a prosthetic#my classmate today is good at colormatching so it wasn't too bad but i feel bad for the girl who put me in a bald cap last semester
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#spoke in court for the first time yesterday i'm alrd fucking scarred for life#literally got hazed by the worst judge ever#he really said 'why do you think you have the right to rep the defendant :/'#i was running on 4 hours of sleep and had to prep for a counsel meeting in the afternoon too#plus i only got the case on short notice .. WHAT DID YOU EXPECT#FUCK#screamin cryin throwin up rn#man made me have an existential crisis like damn what am i doing in life :D#i swear i didn't make this blog as an outlet to rant abt work..... LOL....#starters are gonna come thru over the weekend :')))#ooc.
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i'm just obsessed with her tbh
#verse *:・゚✧ ★ tadpoled#faceclaim *:・゚✧ ★ angel they call me but do they know that i’ve fallen#anyways i got home way too late last night and ended up sleeping in so i wont be here for too long#but i wanna do a lil more blog cleaning#maybe a lil starter if i have the time#and attempt yet again to make icons that arent blurry or huge but we'll see about this one#maybe settle for fckn icon banners or something cause i dont really like going iconless
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Jod help me I'm about to try something I'm allergic to to test if I'm allergic again
#its coconuts#ive decided to try mud wtr and i ordered their starter kit which comes with their creamer and sweetener#the creamer is made with coconut milk and the sweetener is made with coconut sugar#ive hated coconut since i was a kid bc it gives me a sort of cold burning sensation in my sinuses#and then i found out its not supposed to do that#the one time i actually ate a significant amount of coconut as a kid (instead of tasting it and instantly spitting it out)#was when there was a bottomless coconut shrimp basket deal going on at like red lobster or smth#and i love shrimp and couldnt really taste the coconut so i ate a shit ton#and then my throat and mouth got all itchy like my brothers whos allergic to tree nuts does when he eats pecans or walnuts#that was the last time i knowingly ate coconut#then like last year i started going to this boba tea place and getting jasmine tea with jelly boba a lot#and it made my throat itch too. but i had never really had jasmine tea before so i was like#'oh maybe its just bc the flower flavor is really strong? like kinda perfumey? im sure this is normal'#and it tasted good so i kept drinking it#a few months later i decided to google what jelly boba are made of bc i got curious#and i found out theyre made of coconut water 😭#so i switched to popping boba and stopped getting itchy#...and then a few months later i was like 'well maybe i just imagined it' and tried it again bc those jellies were GOOD#...and they did in fact still make my throat itchy. and then i realized i had just paid $7 for Potion of Mouth Hurty#........ANYWAYS im gonna try this coconut creamer and sugar when it comes in to see if it makes my throat itchy#anyone wanna put any money down on the result 😂#rambling#tbh this is probably better than my other plan which was tor try goji berries to see if im allergic to them#bc apparently goji berry can have cross-reactions with some of my other allergies#at least if the coconut stuff causes a reaction i know what that will be and the answer is throat itchy which is basically just annoying#i have no idea what the reaction to goji berry (if any) might be bc ive never had it before#plus if the creamer/sugar DOES make my throat itch i can just... stop using it and continue to drink the mud wtr without it#what would i do with an entire bottle of goji berry vitamins if i tried one and it gave me a reaction??
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One of the things that infuriates me about tumblr R/P is the kind of rolep/layer who is only genuinely interested in writing with you if they can see their muse being romantically and/or sexually involved with yours.
Like I don't give a fuck what you wanna R/P. I'm not paying you, I'm not your boss, and I know damn well I'm not going to change anybody's mind on anything. I just wish people were honest about what they want instead of pretending they want to write with you only to consistently ignore you in favor of muns with muses their character has a crush on.
#The fact this happened with a longform V/T///M R//Per with me as the most recent example.#I was so excited for a new person to join the community much more the longform R//P side of it.#Every thread we wrote died so fast and died on their turns.#Then they constantly ignored my asks/likes on their starter calls and only answer to male muses their muse had been making eyes at.#And the threads they had with those muses went on strong most of the time.#It also felt like the didn't actually give a shit about the source material and I could really feel that when in-universe discussions#were actually happening. Which is again whatever. I think I just got my hopes up too high for that that person ended up seeking.#I don't get why the kept following me on multiple accounts when they were constantly ignoring me. Unless it was to bump their numbers.#All the random slashes are so I don't end up in the tags btw#Sorry for the rant in the tags. I haven't spoken about this out loud and it bugs me sometimes when I see people doing something similar.#zombert.txt
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I love my friends
#i think im just going to talk in the tags for a moment. got a lot on my mind#for starters. the fnaf movie comes out soon. really looking forward to that. think its gonna be awesome and amazing and I'm super excited!!!#secondly. waiting on funds so i can buy that mask i saw the other day and some Halloween candy from Walmart#i . want to do little goodie bags for the kids in my building. but im too scared to go up to their parents and ask candy preference and#allergy concerns. so. idk. maybe I'll just save it. I think it's a cute concept but it makes me feel like my mother.#she loved to do little gift things for people. but it was always people that didn't like her. i don't want to be that way#i know my value. i know my time and energy means something. i don't want to waste it on people who don't give a shit. ya know?#not saying the kids are those kinds of people. not what i mean. but just as an overall thing. i don't like being like her.#...yeah. i dunno. you get raised by one person your whole life. you pick up some of their characteristics#i can't sob without sounding like her. safe to say i am a little emotionally constipated. so i seek other means to relieve that feeling.#like yesterday when i threw up. i played it off like that was a blunder on my body. but i know what i did.#hey. at least it's not the other method. right?. .. yeah. okay. i know. not great either#but it hurts. and I'm so fucking sick and tired of crying over her. genuinely. it's exhausting crying all the time#but that's the only way I can get those emotions out#I've tried to do the counseling thing. but other things made that impossible. then i moved.#and i tried the grief thing but instead i just got a talking buddy? he helps me get out of the house yeah.#but we dont talk about her#... i dunno. I'm just here.#guess i waited long enough. now you get a mini secret. every time i make an i love my friends post. I'm reminding myself why I'm still going#I'm usually sitting around somewhere in my apartment (desk couch bed) crying. alone. thinking about you guys.#so uh. thank you.#i love you guys so much. and i don't know where I'd be without you#probably dead.#💖#vent
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@honorhearted gets a semi-flashback!
the sun is past it's peak in the sky, late afternoon upon thorndil as the princess changes her clothing into something less formal and more of the common classes. she knows ben is outside, her guard for the evening and that he's capable of protesting far more than her other guards feel able to but it's the last day of one of the cities fetes and she wants to experience it, not from the tourneys held within the confines of the palace lands but as her people do. she wants to experience the colors and the joy and the excitement of it and she is ever determined to, it's just a matter of sneaking out of the confines of the palace and making her sir poe doesn't find out. still, she is not an idiot about it, her normally icy blonde hair appears darker, almost as dark as the princes' hair that they'd inherited from their grandfather. nearly black. one of her attendants had created the waxy mixture herself that they had worked through lyliana's hair. it'd come out with a good washing but for now she looked ever unlike herself, at least from the perspective of the feature she was known to the people for. most people of the city had never been close enough to her face to actually remember her facial features. her clothes are layered too, a finer cloak open and hanging off her shoulders revealing a somewhat shabbier one underneath. she could shed the top one once they got to the secret tunnels that'd lead out of the palace. because she fully intended to drag him with her and was well aware if he wanted to keep to his oath to protect his dearest friend he was going to have to join her. alright, perhaps her and sir caleb might have to fight for such title of dearest friend but she did have the fact she was the princess of the nation on her side.
maybe such was playing dirty, but lyliana was determined and it wasn't as if going into the city was going to be as dangerous as when she'd drug him out into the darhk forest when they were younger. now that, even she could admit, hadn't been the smartest move. but her dragon had been overhead so they'd made the trip in one piece. ah to be young and adventurous. she thinks, a small smirk coming to her features that she knows will certainly not be on sir ben's. door to her chambers opens gently and quietly, her half-stepping out to draw his attention from his watch of the corridor. he certainly had to have expected something from her, rare was it that she let him merely do his job outside her chambers without engaging in some kind of conversation or excursion even if it was just a walk about the gardens in the evening before she'd go to sleep because sir ben wasn't her other guards. they'd known each other most of their lives, experienced growing up together, been tutored together at times and while she was always nice and engaging with the rest of the watch which protected her, she always felt a certain level of guilt that ben was to watch over her when he was one of the people she trusted above many others, when to her he was her equal rather than just another knight sworn honor and defend her family. she never had liked holding herself above others in any real sense, even if she was the crown princess and sometimes pulled rank to get her way on such occasions like this night.
"ben--" she begins, using his name and not the honorific in an attempt to win him over with their friendship. "--before you try to say no, let me remind you that i'll find a way to go out there even if i have to call apo to my window. and that will cause far more of a scene than if we just sneak out through the tunnels. it's the last day and i want to see it and i'll surely i'l be the safest princess in all of the ten if you're with me." her eyes are pleading in that way that always reminds of a baby animal or child. completely innocent, except she knows they are both well aware of her use of such tactic, at least with him and perhaps her father and brother. as a point of fact she's used such on his father before too. it never quite worked on her mother though. "i promise we don't have to stay in the city long."
#i figure this could a few months before so their ages aren't really that altered or it could be a year before or a few years before#whatever time frame you want it to be i just figured it'd be fun to let them have a little happy adventure to balance the pain of the other#thread :D#thread; city adventure#honorhearted#muse; princess lyliana carvahali#plus it helps us build some of their backstory :D#i'm also going to assume that when they speak they are likely using largarthian rather than the common language since theyd' both have been#tutored it and a lot of people in the palace and nobles and such would use it#though i also think if they were tutored together he might also know high lagarthian or if he wasn't taught it she certainly would have#taught him#so might be something they could speak when they actually get in the city so people dont understand them that are around them?#but anyway i hope the starter is alright#also! she's got clothes for him covered too! ;D because he can't be in whatever knightly stuff he's in while going out into the city either
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okay i'll shut up about how dirty galar was done in journeys in a bit but eve and i were talking about this- it is SO depressing that galar actually made me dislike more galar pokemon than it made me appreciate them. sorry grookey and morpeko fans but i find those two incredibly annoying now because of the show's godawful choices with them and that's so unfair. especially since grookey is a starter- we're SUPPOSED to like that one
#tho ill admit i dislike morpeko significantly more bc of the ha ha starving in poverty jokes#i dont even like team rocket especially in this season but those jokes were just uncomfortably mean spirited#those jokes are in most seasons but it never got as bad as ''ha ha theyre crying and screaming bc theyre starving to death isnt that FUNNY'#grookey was just really annoying in most of its episodes and barely lived up to the galar starters before it#whereas the morpeko stuff was outright uncomfortable to sit through#echoed voice#anyways heres hoping horizons redeems grookey to me. i fear its too late for morpeko cause i already thought it was ugly
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Game time >:3c (Patreon)
#Doodles#The game concept I referenced a bit back!#Technically this would fall under#Dream log#In the dream it had a much cleaner aesthetic which is actually a bit ironic haha considering the POV had just made it on the spot#It should've looked much more like mine! I also made mine quite quickly to make sure it got out of my head and into physicality :)#They must've had quite the production team haha ♪ Crisp laminated cards and a 15-slot board!#Thinking about translating it to the real world I went for an L-shape so I wouldn't have to use too much paper#But it would probably be a fold-out map in three sections - I'm still into the idea of making it modular as well :)#Or at least able to change out different boards for different stories and plot beats! Mix things up!#Very much like Madlibs in that way#So far the playtesting has been minimal but if nothing nothing else it was fun to doodle up and consider the characters and locations ♪#Starter pack! Comes with expansions with more characters and places! Hehe#I really enjoy drawing with decisive lines I just get nervous rather often ahh#But drawing like this is so fun! It's almost like drawing with ink :) No erasing! Careful and carefree! It's very fun#Especially when they turn out so cute <3 Like the Ghost or the Scientist haha ♪ I might've made the latter with smol in mind hehe#She did end up liking them :)#I also tried to keep most of them fairly gender neutral or at least open to interpretation since anyone could pick any card :)#Combining design elements like for the Medic of the mask-uline and feminine head covering hehe ♪#I think the Ghost is still my favourite tho which is funny 'cause I initially only drew a sheet ghost#The skeleton inside makes them so much cuter! Haha#They're all cute though :D Love when that happens ♪#I have a few more ideas - more for expansion packs later!
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i don't think i'll have time to write very much before dinner's ready, but i kinda wanna write an open for chiyo bc i love she
#would y'all take my open... i don't even know what it would be about though :' )#i also wanna write an open for makiko bc poor gal gets left on the backburner too often#i miss her :((( she's got some of the best development#literally has me clenching my dang fists thinking about it!!#really though is there anyone y'all would like to see opens for? bc i know i do focus on chiyo and kaiya a lot when i write those#and a better question -- do y'all like open starters or prefer memes#the rpc is a mystery to me sometimes bc when things don't get a response i feel like a lot of the time it's my bad timing#but also maybe people just aren't into it? it's hard to tell#ANYWAY i'm about to write what i can before it's dinner time!#get ready to ramble | ooc
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TODAY REALLY WAS MIKA DAY FOR ME HUH
#I REALLY WANTED HIS FS1 SO IM SO HAPPY !!!!#this was pulling in the new collab scout bc i wanted shinobu#and not only i got mika but also the 5* collab subaru (which im happy i got it!!!) and starter keito too but STILL NO SHINOBU#like.... what are the probabilities of getting 3 5* and not the 4* you want#this gacha is really something
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sucrose is like... the cutest thing ever
#⇢₊˚⊹ 🩷∥ruby∥yo,ide yo !!#i made an alt acc to play as aether cuz i picked lumine in my og#just out of curiosity#and for my starter pull i got sucrose#in my og i don't have sucrose (yet. istg if i dont get even ONE copy of her from the current banner...)#so i got to use her for the first time#and she reminds me a lot of hanayo from love live#except she's an alchemy nerd and not an idol fan#i like me some pana so unsurprisingly i like sucrose too#you know what's funny though#they give you two discounted acquaint fate 10-pulls when you're first starting out right?#but instead of giving me another character in the second 10-pull#the game gave me another sucrose#i'm slightly bummed that i didn't get like bennett or xingqiu or chongyun#or literally anyone else because i need more teammates#but i can't complain too much because you know. it's sucrose#also her little ears flick up in her idle animation and it's the most adorable thing i've ever seen#i also really like the physics on her cape thing and her ponytail#idk how to explain it. it's just really satisfying to me
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#ok we're gonna try to finish this story in under 30 tags ok let's go#SO. 'hahaha yeah wow that's crazy that you know him! we did date yeah. (does not elaborate)'#but. okay confession time. i know this was a questionable choice. it was selfish. it fed the brain gremlin that craves validation#but i never blocked M on snapchat#so even though we never talked. i could see when he viewed my stories. and i won't lie. there is a smug part of me that enjoyed#letting him see me go on about my life.#i am a flawed bitch. so sue me. it was a manageable amount of contact that didn't send me into spirals#and he DID keep viewing them.#he even messaged me once! i don't know maybe a year ago. it was totally out of the blue. 'saw this book and thought of you' on a picture of#a nice edition of The Hobbit. i didn't respond. i had to have a petty moment for all the times during the Bad Era when i tried to message#him and he took too long (in my shitty estimation) to message back. so i left him on read. for like a year#okay you can see where this is going so I'll cut to the chase#'i ran into a friend of yours' is a perfectly reasonable conversation starter. it can be the whole conversation if it needs to be.#well. it wasn't#idk. my world state for the last six years has been 'M doesn't care for me and there is no world in which we ever have a civil chat again.'#well. that doesn't track with 'it's past my bedtime but i don't mind staying up to chat' and 'i would love to get an earful about podcasts'#and 'let's chat again' and 'it was really great to hear from you'#idk. i don't know what emotion i should feel. anger is gonna be the first one that makes it to the surface i think#got a good healthy dose of anger happening#grief. i do think there's some grief. mmhmm yep there it is#there are probably some positive emotions but those are the most strenuously repressed and i don't think I'm ready to let the collar off#i have made a lot of choices in the last six years to protect my mental health specifically because of how that relationship ended#so even just talking to him is. well for one thing it's playing a bit fast and loose with the health i have managed to build up#i feel good. my life has been good lately. my therapist moved me from monthly to once every three months. my social life is the most#thriving it's ever been#i am possibly in a place to unbox some things that were thrown in the attic as an emergency measure#i should talk to my therapist
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