#i really hope this is understandable and can be followed through

[meazalykov]

farewell

barca femeni x reader

summary: you didn't want to say goodbye, but you had to.

warnings: angst

the fluorescent lights hum above you, the sound barely noticeable over the pounding of your heart. you’re gripping the back of a chair so tightly your knuckles turn white. 

your stomach churns, and for a moment, you consider turning around and walking out. but you can’t. they deserve to hear it from you—not from the media, not from rumors. 

they’re all seated around the table, waiting. alexia’s brow furrows slightly, her eyes scanning your face. 

“what’s wrong?” she asks softly, her voice full of concern.

you swallow hard, trying to find your voice. 

“i… i need to talk to you all about something,” you swallow hard, trying to find your voice. your words shaky, unsure. 

patri tilts her head, her lips quirking into a faint smile like she’s trying to ease your nerves. “you’re concerning us, y/n. just say it.”

your throat tightens, and your gaze drops to the table. 

“it’s—” you pause, forcing the words out. “it’s about my future here. at barca.”

the silence that follows feels deafening. alexia leans forward, her elbows resting on the table. “what about your future?” she presses gently, but you can hear the undercurrent of worry in her tone.

“i don’t think…” you hesitate again, tears burning the back of your eyes. you shake your head, willing them not to fall. 

“i don’t think i can stay here anymore.”

mapi sits up straighter, her eyes widening. “what are you talking about? you’re incredible. you’ve been amazing since you got called up from la masia. why would you even think about leaving?”

you bite your lip hard, the sharp sting grounding you for a moment. “i’m not saying it because i want to leave,” you say quickly, your voice trembling. 

“i love this team. you’re my family. but…” you exhale shakily. “i’m barely playing. i’m barely getting minutes. i—i feel like i’m just… here. like i’ll never grow. like i’ll never be like you, mapi.”

alexia’s expression shifts to one of denial. “that’s not true, y/n. you’re already one of the best defenders we have. you’ve just got less experience. that comes with time.”

you shake your head, tears slipping down your cheeks now despite your best efforts. 

“but when, alexia? when will i get that time? it’s always someone else—ingrid, mapi, ona, and marta– if its not them it's jana frido and esmee. i understand why. you’re all incredible but where does that leave me? i feel like i’ll always just be stuck here, waiting, hoping for scraps of time on the pitch.”

you pause, your chest tightening as the memory cuts through you again. 

“do you remember the champions league final against lyon?” you ask, your voice trembling as you try to steady yourself. 

alexia’s face softens, and she nods slowly. “of course,” she says, her voice quiet, like she already knows where this is going.

“we were up 2-0,” you begin, the ache in your chest growing heavier. 

“i thought… i really thought it was going to be my moment. jona told me to warm up. he told me, ‘be ready, y/n. you’re going in soon.’ i could feel it. the adrenaline, the nerves, all of it. i was ready to step up. i knew i could help.”

you clench your fists, your nails digging into your palms as the frustration bubbles up. 

“and then… nothing. i waited. and waited. and when lyon almost scored from bacha’s cross, i thought, ‘okay, this is it. this is when he’ll call me.’ but jona didn’t. he subbed on esmee. and i just stood there, watching as the game time slipped away from me.”

alexia’s jaw tightens, her hands balling into fists on the table. “that wasn’t fair to you, but jona is not here anymore.” she says, her voice sharp, laced with anger she doesn’t even try to hide.

“it’s not just that,” you continue, your voice breaking. 

“it’s every time. we were up 5-0 against sevilla, and i thought, ‘there’s no way i won’t get minutes now.’ but he didn’t even glance my way. i warmed up for five minutes, and then the final whistle blew. i didn’t even get to step on the pitch.” 

you shake your head, tears streaming down your cheeks as your voice rises. 

“how am i supposed to grow if no one trusts me enough to let me try? i’m 21, alexia. i should be trusted to step up by now. i shouldn’t still be sitting on the bench, waiting for the chance that never comes.”

mapi’s face softens as she steps toward you, placing a hand on your shoulder. “that’s not on you,” she says gently, her voice steady. 

“you’ve done everything right. we see you. we know how good you are.”

“but it doesn’t matter if the coach doesn’t,” you whisper, your voice cracking. 

“and maybe he never will. another coach does though-- just somewhere else.”  

the silence in the room is heavy, the weight of your words sinking into all of them. patri’s brows knit together as she looks at you, her voice soft. 

“so… where are you going?” she asks carefully.

you nod, wiping at your face. 

“i think it might be bayern. they’ve been watching me. my agent said they trust me. they’re giving me a chance to actually play, to prove myself.”

ingrid sighs, nodding slowly as understanding flickers across her face. 

“it makes sense,” she says quietly. “bayern’s defense has holes, and a player like you? fast, smart, and tactical—you’d fit perfectly there.”

alexia’s eyes narrow, her jaw clenching again. “but they’re not us,” she says firmly, her voice almost pleading. 

“we’re your family, y/n. don’t you see that?”

your chest tightens at her words. “i know,” you whisper, tears spilling over again. 

“and i love all of you so much. but how can i stay when i feel like i’m being held back? i need to grow, alexia. i need to be more than just potential.”

alexia’s hands grip the edge of the table as she stares down at it, her shoulders tense. 

“it’s not fair,” she mutters, her voice thick with emotion. “you shouldn’t have to choose between staying with us and growing as a player.”

“but i do,” you say softly, your voice trembling. “and i wish i didn’t. i wish things could be different. i can-can’t be stuck on the bench.”

patri frowns, her hand reaching across the table toward yours. “you’re not stuck. you’ve got all of us. you’re part of this team.”

“am i?” your voice cracks. 

“like i said.. when we’re up 5-0, coach does not even sub me on sometimes. when they do, it’s the 70th minute, maybe later. i’m not ungrateful, but how can i grow if i don’t play?”

the room falls silent again. the lump in your throat grows heavier as you force yourself to continue. 

“my agent said… they said i need to leave if i want to reach my full potential.”

alexia flinches slightly, her face falling. 

“but… bayern?” alexia’s voice is filled with disbelief. 

“you’re really going to leave? leave us?”

your chest tightens at her words. “ale, you know that i don’t want to,” you admit, your voice breaking. 

“but what choice do i have? if i stay, i’ll never grow. i’ll always be stuck in the shadows of all of you.”

mapi’s gaze softens, and she gets up, walking over to you. she places a hand on your shoulder, her grip firm and reassuring. “we’ve all been where you are, y/n. that feeling of not being enough, of needing to prove yourself… it’s awful. but if this is what you need to do, then we support you.”

“mapi,” alexia snaps, her voice laced with frustration. 

“how can you say that? she’s part of us.”

mapi sighs, turning to alexia. 

“because i care about her, alexia. because she deserves this.”

tears are streaming down your face now, and you quickly wipe them away. “i’m sorry,” you whisper. 

“i’m so sorry. i love you all so much. i wish it could be different.”

alexia stands, her jaw clenched as she stares at you. “when?” she finally asks, her voice low.

you meet her gaze, your heart breaking. “january. the transfer will be official then.”

alexia looks away, her hands on her hips as she takes a moment to process. when she finally looks back at you, her eyes are glassy. “you’ve grown so much,” she says, her voice barely steady. “you’ve become like a baby sister to me. i don’t want you to go.”

“i don’t want to leave,” you whisper, your voice trembling again. “but i have to.”

you know how reality is. you might keep contact with your barcelona teammates for a few weeks after transferring to bayern, and things will fade afterwards. that is how life goes, people move on, and you know you will have to as well if you want to fit in at bayern.

after joining the senior team two years ago from la masia, you thought that barcelona was going to be the club you played at for your whole career. you thought wrong.

alexia steps forward, pulling you into a tight hug. her arms wrap around you with a kind of desperation, like she’s afraid letting go will make you disappear. “you’re going to be amazing,” she murmurs. “but i’m going to miss you so much.”

patri joins the hug next, her smaller frame squeezing you tightly. “bayern doesn’t know how lucky they are,” she says softly. “they’re getting one of the best.”

“i wish coach would see what we all see in you, amor.” alexia says. 

mapi and ingrid come next, the four of them holding you like they’re trying to etch the moment into memory. ingrid’s voice is calm and steady as she reassures you, “the bundesliga is a great league. you’ll fit in perfectly. trust yourself.”

when they finally pull away, alexia’s hand lingers on your shoulder. “promise me one thing,” she says, her voice firm.

“anything,” you reply.

“don’t lose that kindness or growing confidence,” she says, her lips curving into a bittersweet smile. 

“it’s what makes you special. don’t let anyone take that from you.”

you nod, tears still spilling down your cheeks. “i won’t.”

as you leave the room, your heart aches with the weight of the goodbye. you never thought that you would say farewell to the love of your life, barcelona, but sometimes you have to let go of the things you love most for your own good.

masterlist

[coquettepascal]

felicitas and her general

summary: general acacius has caught your attention after being the first mortal to worship you in decades. you only face one challenge: don't get too attached.

warnings: rated g, contains spoilers for gladiator ii, follows the timeline of the movie somewhat, reader is the goddess felicitas (who is the goddess of good luck,) this fic is basically just an add on to the movie.

tags: goddess!reader x general acacius, emotional infidelity, lots of roman mythology stuff, writer is basing all her knowledge out of what she remembers from PJO and HoO, worship, complicated feelings, marcus does not cheat on lucilla physically, yearning, pining, grieving, guilt, major character death(s), stalking (kind of), a lot of obsession/dedication, angst, hurt no comfort but also hurt with comfort.

a/n: i watched gladiator ii and then was too emotionally devastated to finish this fic the way i planned. i really hope you all like this!! also, this fic is also dedicated to my dear friend @pascalssbabyy because she is my biggest cheerleader and i love her <33

wc: 7.2k (not beta read)

It was he who woke you.

A quiet sacrifice in the evening that felt like the freshest breath of air you could have, more intense than what you could have atop any mountain, near any spring. The scent of burning meat and smokey vegetables grasped at your lungs, and you almost choked on it. How long had it been since someone had offered you something so kind? Real food, not just scraps of something they didn’t wish for. 

You’d never complain about how difficult it is to be a minor Goddess, you know that you could be a mortal, but most don’t think of how Gods can fade. It’s a physical process, one where you’d notice how your fingertips passed through things like chalices and bowls, how a spoon slid through your hand once. The clatter of gold on the table was embarrassing, even though you were alone. Nothing about being forgotten, or fading, physically hurt. It was only mentally taxing, knowing that you weren’t as important as you once were, that mortals found you insignificant.

Generals used to come and offer things frequently sometime ago, but you couldn’t even begin to understand how long ago that was. When you’re immortal, or supposed to be, mortal lives seem fleeting. You had taken them for granted, and regret it now, for all you have now are the empty clouds above your temple. 

The last offering you can gather was from a young boy, who wanted to win a board game against his sister the next day. He had given you half a bun with strips of meat. Sure, it was thoughtful, but this was something rich. 

You finish inhaling the offering, and then hear the offerer's voice. But it’s muffled, and you want to see who it is anyways, so you swipe through the clouds and create a window to see. Then you can hear him clearly.

Someone who is clearly a general kneels at your altar, which is chipped and dirty. The ashes of the food are in front of him, smoking still, and you can taste the wealth in his meal. It can’t distract you from him though, he is striking.

Broad shoulders support a heavy, curly, grey, head of hair, which is bowed in honor of you. His body is widely built, sturdy for battle, and his voice is just as powerful. You’re so focused on hearing his voice you only catch the tail end of his request.

“... Allow me to come home safely, if not for Rome, then for my wife.”

Your heart squeezes, and you swear you can feel the ichor gushing through your veins. Scarcely when a General came to give you an offering all those years ago would he mention a wife, only ever wishing for luck in the upcoming battle or war. But here, now, you’ve been given a respectful request and offering. It isn’t a thought in your mind to not favor him now, your eyes closing and your mouth murmuring a blessing to him. It feels intoxicating to use some of your power again, especially on someone who asked for it. It also feels intoxicating to watch this General leave.

He looks around before he goes, seeming to note how degraded your small temple has become. The statue of you that lies ahead of your altar is yellowing, and ironically, multiple fingers have broken off. The General seems displeased by this, sighing as he exits the temple.

His gait is heavy, sandaled steps weighted as he walks down them and into the torch-lit night. You find yourself looking for him even after he’s disappeared from your sight, the warmth of gratefulness hugging around you. Part of you knows better than to play around with the thought, but still you wish to know more about him.

—

It worsens when he comes back. A few times a week he returns, offering rich foods. It’s been a month now, and you are coming back to life.

Fading didn’t feel like anything, but coming back feels like so much more. The first few offerings had your body feeling alight again, like the ichor in you was flowing again, but within the last two weeks you’ve gotten your fingertips back. They were tingling for a day and then the next you were able to properly grasp things again, nothing was slipping through you.

In that time you had also learned his name. A guard had come looking for him one night, and stood behind him whilst he prayed. You had found yourself smiling when he didn’t interrupt himself, instead acting aggravated once he had finished. The guard had apologized for interrupting and let him know that “Your wife wishes to speak to you, General Acacius.”

Acacius. 

You still don’t know his first name, but it is enough. You can think of it when you feel lonely, when you are bored. Something to associate with the offerings, with the blessings. The fact he has been so consistent hints at a desperation, which would usually repel you from blessing him, but he is the only one who seems to recognize you. His efforts are not going to go unseen by you, not when you have so little to do.

You can feel yourself conceding to your need to know him more, but just as you begin to fight yourself again, he shows up.

Tonight he’s dressed a little nicer. Usually he arrives in a plain tunic but this one has golden trim on it, and his hair is a little more tousled. He stumbles into your altar holding something in a cloth, but he’s walking like he’s… drunk? 

Acacius meanders to your altar, grabbing a torch along the way, and then empties the contents of the cloth. It produces a small dessert bun, a Libum, or honey cheesecake, and your mouth waters. So much of the food that is given to you is savory meats, masculine foods that are heavy on the senses, but this is sweet and delicate. You can, of course, eat whatever you’d like. You’re a Goddess, and though you aren’t major, you are still very fortunate.

But this feels thoughtful.

The General drops to his knees after lighting the bun ablaze, swaying slightly, and now you know he must be drunk.

“Goddess Felicitas,” he begins as normal, “I am sorry I am later than usual. Though I don’t know if Goddesses sleep. I was… caught up in other affairs, but I made it in time.”

He is less eloquent than usual and seems particularly focused on how it is nearly past midnight.

“I brought you this though,” he gestures to the half burnt bun. “I wanted to bring you something different than meat and… things. I thought a dessert would be fitting for that task.”

Acacius pauses now. His thoughts are probably muddled from whatever he drank, and you find yourself smiling. Foolery has never been so endearing to you.

“You have been listening to me, I suppose. My requests for luck in battle have been answered, as well as my safety being ensured. Your blessings have brought my wife peace of mind, something I could not previously afford to her.”

He looks so small in your temple tonight. Normally he is not so vulnerable, but his shoulders sag as he mentions his wife. Some sort of shame runs over him at the idea that he could not ease his wife’s worries, but it makes you feel better that you could help. 

“Goddess Felicitas, I come here tonight bearing no requests, just gratitude. Your blessings have soothed wounds I could not see, and I feel like a young soldier again. You invigor me.” 

Then, he leaves. 

You watch helplessly as he stumbles back down the steps and away from your temple, and more than ever you wish to chase him. The love he has for his wife is clear, and you hold no jealousy of that, but you wish it were you. Something in you is deeply attached to this General now. He has awoken you so much more than rekindling your power as a goddess, more than releasing you from the grief that comes with fading. Yes, Acacius has made your heart beat again, your mind curious again, and you feel seen. Being worshipped is not the same as being loved, if that were true you’d have had many children by now, 

But after so long being forgotten, this feels like what you remember being loved as.

—

You try not to interact with the other Gods for the most part. They tend to meddle in things they don’t need to, and are sensitive. You are not exempt from this stereotype, but that’s only more reason for the distance. 

But today, you venture to meet another deity.

Morpheus is not hard to find. He is pretty stationery where he is, usually lounging on a rock or bench near his temple, or above it in the clouds. He is a bit…dramatic, from what you remember, but wise. 

Today he is stretched out on a cloud above his temple, eyes shut. His pale skin stretches taut on his bones as his lean frame breathes deeply. But, he is not asleep. 

“Morpheus,” you speak. 

His body rolls toward your direction, eyes still shut, but a small smile on his face.

“O young goddess Felicitas, what brings you to me?” He questions.

It’s hard not to feel embarrassed. You’ve spoken to Morpheus on very rare occasions, but he’s always been somewhat helpful, though nosy. Dreams tell a lot about people, and when he’s the one giving them to people, it’s hard to hide anything at all.

You don’t want him to know of your true affection for General Acacius, just that he is… worthy of a visit. 

And so you begin to describe it to Morpheus, your need to visit Acacius. He doesn’t open his eyes at all, but he raises his eyebrows a lot and seems bemused at your situation. You’re only halfway through your rambling before he raises a gangly limb and waves at your words.

“Felicitas, you think you are the only Goddess wishing to visit her admirer? You need no explanation,” he says jovially. 

Morpheus reaches into the air and pulls 6 black berries into existence, then drops them into your open palm.

“When you know he is asleep, bite down on one of these and think of him,” he describes to you.

The berries smell like nothing, but a powdery residue is left on your skin as you roll them in your palm. It doesn’t repel you at all.

Tonight, you will visit him and express the same gratitude he did to you. 

—

Marcus lays next to his wife, Lucilla, with her hand in his. She fell asleep sometime ago, leaving him to lie awake by himself.

He didn’t make it to her temple tonight and the guilt is festering in his body. Marcus knows that she is a Goddess, that he probably isn’t a thought in her mind. He knows that he is just another whiney mortal, giving her food that isn’t nearly as good as whatever Gods eat. His insignificance grows as he feeds into his guilt. 

Stress has permeated his life for much of it, from his time as a young soldier up until now, as a General. Battles, politics, and his family, have created a breeding ground for him to be wracked with anxieties, but he stays strong. Thanks to his time in Felicitas temple, it’s been better.

Which is why failing to make it to her temple tonight is making him feel so bad.

He grabs at the linen sheets of his bed, stressing and trying to reassure himself until he falls asleep finally.

—

Being in a dream is weird. It feels much the same as it does when you disguise yourself as a mortal, the out of body experience is semi-familiar, but it’s weird because someone else is there.

You’ve been watching the General enjoy the lake in front of him for a few minutes now. He hasn’t slipped into it, but just walks along the waterline. It seems like he is looking for something. Surely his dreams usually contain more action, or perhaps are memories, so you assume it may be strangely understimulating for him.

The appearance you’ve chosen is one of modesty, but elegance. A seafoam green peplos hangs off your frame delicately, with golden clasps at the wrists and waist. You did your hair so it would be tucked out of your face. There is no guarantee that Acacius will recognize you like this, but you look much like your statue that’s within your temple.

Swallowing your nerves, you shimmer yourself into visibility. The grassy field is odd beneath your feet, and you walk toward him with uncertainty in each step. You’ve never met with a mortal before, and you haven’t stepped on anything earthy in a long while. His broad stature only becomes more daunting as you get closer, especially since he seems so focused.

You will have to speak first. You’re much too quiet in this environment, and you must act fast lest he wake before you get his attention.

“General Acacius,” you speak firmly, though your hands shake. 

This is so unfamiliar to you. You’ve barely even seen his face, as he’s usually bowed at your altar. It is the first time you’ll see him at an equal level, the first time you’ll have brought yourself to him rather than him to you. 

He turns quickly, an instinctual aggressiveness toward the unknown. You stand about 10 feet from him, eyes widening.

Acacius is striking. His nose is what you focus on first, strong in shape and line, but behind it are his eyes which look to you with wide acknowledgement. His hair curls around his head in greying ringlets, like a permanent laurel crowning him. The wide expanse of his back was once impressive, but now you can see the solid wall which he becomes when facing you. Nothing could push him over it seems, a man built to stand.

Your heart squeezes the way it did the first time he gave you a request, a tender rush tingling your whole body. No words come out of either of your mouths, and the General drops to one knee instantly. 

He recognizes you.

“Goddess Felicitas,” he rushes out in a breath. His chest is heaving as he bows his head and no, no this isn’t how you want this.

Your feet are moving before you can focus on your anxiety, bringing you so close to him that you can kneel too. Maybe a goddess should not kneel before a mortal general, but you are just on your knees rather than putting yourself below him. Your peplos billows a little as air rushes through it when you hit the grass.

He is above you like this, and you tilt your head to see his face again. His strong brow is furrowed, eyes squeezed shut like he is afraid of you. 

“Acacius,” you say softly, “I am not here for… for ill reason. Please relax yourself.”

You lean back as he relaxes, head tipping upwards as he kneels in front of you as well. Now you can meet his eyes, see the crinkles that are beside them, and really take him in.

An energy of anxiety is shared wordlessly, with him stiff from the sight of a literal goddess, and you with the fear of… something. 

The identity of your anxieties isn’t something that you can figure out. Maybe it’s too much to see such a handsome mortal, or maybe it’s that you’re going to thank him for his offerings so personally. Maybe it’s humiliation from this act. What would other Gods think of this? Is it not degrading to become so attached to a mortal? Are you no better than Zeus or Hermes, the gods who interact too intimately with mortals? 

The sound of his labored breathing alerts you, calls your attention back to the present moment. 

“I wanted to thank you,” you admit meekly, “for your offerings. You have been very generous and… devoted.”

His eyes are shifty, and you can see the terror in him still. You don’t want him to fear you, but you can understand why. Visits from Gods or other deities can mean trouble, but you aren’t significant like that.

“General Acacius you are the first mortal who has acknowledged me in a long time,” you offer a vulnerability, perhaps trying to soothe him.

It feels so backwards for you to be kneeling in front of him, speaking. He has done so in front of your altar for many weeks now, but now the spots are switched, yet you are still in power. You avert your gaze as you speak up, wanting to request something of him.

“You’ve been so generous to me, General, I was hoping to know more about you.”

And now, rather than scared, he seems suspicious. 

“To know me?” He clarifies. 

You nod.

“I only know your last name. I think I could offer more luck and splendor if we were more… personal.” 

Gods that felt awful to say. You’re no better than the whorish brutes on their thrones, offering petty glories for intimacy. Everything feels flirtatious but that’s not what you’re looking for. Acacius has a wife he clearly loves, you would never want to interrupt that. 

He seems to hesitate, but he knows he cannot refuse you. So far your blessings have brought ease to his life, he wouldn’t want to lose that.

“Then… yes, I suppose I can offer myself if it would please you.” He responds stoically. 

And it does please you, to know his name. Marcus Acacius, the one who woke you, the one who has saved you from being a fragmented memory within the temples. 

Marcus Acacius, who you are too fond of.

—

You visit him 3 more times. In an attempt to space out the usage of the berries Morpheus gave you, you only visit him once a week. The bleak tasting berries are sour on your tongue, a rotten sour which lingers once you wake up, but it’s worth it.

The two of you have grown closer, with Marcus opening up more. He tells you about the stresses in his life, how much anxiety is buried in him. But, he’s confident for the sake of his wife. You’ve learned that her name is Lucilla, and much more about her. Marcus talks about her a lot, in passing or retelling something she told him. In the small amount of time you’ve gotten to know him, you’ve gotten to know her as well.

It burns you with a strange warmth, a desire and envy which makes your stomach growl. You are hungry for him to admire you in the same way, to speak of you, but doesn’t he already? Shame grips your throat when you think of it. You are a Goddess who he sacrifices to, who he wishes to have blessings from. What more do you need? A mortal couldn't offer you what another deity could. 

After the fourth meeting, you found yourself lonely. Lazing back in the clouds above your temple, you woke with a deep hunger. Marcus is beautiful, an admirable man, and he loves passionately. You are already being such a glutton for even speaking with him, meeting with him repeatedly, so why must you yearn for him too? 

Worship isn’t enough, you want what you will never let yourself to have.

Nothing hints that he might feel similarly. His starry gaze which lands on you is not due to your beauty, your personality, or anything more. You have blessed him, and that is why his eyes glitter. Goddess status has never made you feel so low and isolated. Still, you are happy to help him achieve what he wishes, even as it cripples your heart.

Tonight you plan on visiting him. That fourth visit was a week and a half ago, he may be wondering where you are. He still comes to your altar each night, but the prayers are less personal. Marcus saves his stories and ramblings for when the two of you are in the field, or near the lake, when the two of you are really alone.

—

You bite into the berry at around midnight. Its tangy yet death-tasting juice floods your mouth, clinging to the crevices between your teeth and staining your gums. Closing your eyes, you think of Marcus, and his curls, and his eyes, and his nose, and his strong hands.

And then you are there, and he is waiting. 

It seems like his subconsciousness has picked to be at the lake today, and he’s sat in the sand at the edge of the water. You walk over to him, but notice how… down he appears to be.

“She is not happy with me,” Marcus confesses before you even sit down.

You stand a few feet back from him, looking at how his curls fall around his bowed head.

“Lucilla?” You ask softly.

He nods.

A wicked feeling begins to steep in your heart. She is upset with him, he is in need of you for something more than a blessing. 

And so you listen. 

It’s one of the longer meetings the two of you have had. Marcus doesn’t cry, but he seems truly upset. He’s been called to go off somewhere far again, to fight and kill. Reassurances that you will protect him as best you can only soothe him so much. 

He doesn't care if he dies, he cares that his beloved is distraught over this. 

The more the two of you talk, the closer you get. There are marks on the sand from where you originally sat, but now you kneel in front of him, with creased brows and worried eyes. This isn’t something you can fix, you aren’t familiar with love and its intricacies. 

His knees were tucked closer to his chest before, but they’ve loosened now and his fists rest atop them, clenching. Frustration sits on his face like a mask, one you wish to take off him.

Touching is not… something either of you partake in. Sometimes your shoulders will brush when you sit together, but nothing more has ever been initiated. 

That is why it doesn’t surprise you when he flinches as your hand reaches out to rest on top of his right clenched fist. 

“Marcus,” you say softly, wanting to offer comfort, but he cuts you off.

“Don’t,” he replies swiftly.

At first it hurts, watching as he waves off your hand from his own, but then you look at his face rather than where your hands were joined. The frustrated look on his face is gone, replaced with something worse, something guilty. His eyes aren’t glittering at you like usual, nor are they hardened with anger.

They’re soft pools of conflict that mirror your own.

It doesn’t soothe your burn, satiate your envy. You can see in his eyes that maybe you aren’t alone in these feelings of admiration, of want, but maybe this is not what you want.

Maybe you want a different universe, one where he doesn’t have to be a mortal and you, a Goddess. So you wouldn’t have to worry about him dying, and have this friendship survive off death flavored berries. Maybe you want a universe where he isn’t married, where he could be yours and you wouldn’t feel like a spectator to his heart.

Maybe you want that, but you won’t get it.

Instead the flames of jealousy die in your chest and are replaced with tumors of guilt. Your whole body feels bloated, embarrassed, and ugly. 

The pair of you stare at each other, a stupid realization between the both of you as you realize that your secrets have been spilled, even though it’s the same one.

His eyes don’t move from yours, so you move from his.

The sandy edge of the lake does not look so bright now, even though there are no clouds in Marcus’s dream. 

“When do you leave?” You ask softly. 

You will not follow him into whatever battle he’ll win. Don’t embarrass yourself, Goddess.

He tells you two weeks. You say you’ll see him before then.

Then you wake on a cloud again, with a cavity of guilt in your chest.

—

Marcus wakes alone. 

Lucilla had not wanted to sleep with him that night, choosing to stay elsewhere. She didn’t tell him where, she left in a quiet flurry of tears and anguish.

It’s easier for him to feel guilt over his Goddess than it is to hurt his beloved, even if it is the same.

In a moment of frustration he grasps at the sheets, turning over and biting at his pillow. The bed is so cold, and the room smells like stale air even though the window is open, the night breezy. 

He knows she is beautiful because she is a Goddess. All Goddesses are beautiful, ethereal beings that mortals cannot even comprehend at times. Marcus knows he is lucky to even perceive her, for her to have chosen to visit him.

Yet through all her blessings, he feels cursed.

A plague of emotional infidelity is crawling through his body, sticking to his bones and making him stiff. Everything he does has felt flat for so long, from pretending he is grateful to the Emperors, to now pretending nothing is wrong in his marriage. He’s scared, and exhausted.

Marcus rubs a hand over his face after rolling over and sitting up in bed, groaning into his palm. 

At first he tried to blame her for it. What would a Goddess want from a successful General other than a demigod hero son? What could truly be so special about him? He assumed she was manipulating him, using some sort of power to morph his heart, but now he knows it is not true.

If she had wanted to, she would have had him by now, and he knows this. If she had wanted to, her hand would have stayed where it was tonight, and pushed him further. It isn’t unlike the Gods to force themselves on a mortal, but she didn’t.

Instead, his hand feels hot where hers rested, and his mind is spinning. 

Marcus doesn’t fall asleep again, afraid that he’ll see her. 

—

You wait for a full two weeks before you visit him again. He had been coming to your temple less, and you had assumed he was busy with preparations for the coming battle. 

The stubbornness you felt that night has not left you. At first you did not leave your temple in fear that you would grow attached, now you remain there because you have grown attached. 

“Enough is enough,” you had thought to yourself. 

But it is hard not to miss him, and his soothing prayers. The way his offerings tasted of smoke and sweet, and how he’d always burn such a large portion. Marcus never gave you scraps, he seemed to refuse to. 

However, you can only distance yourself so far. 

It is quiet when you approach him. He is sitting in the field this time, the lake a distant glitter in your eyes. He does not face you, but his head isn’t bowed like before.

“Marcus,” you greet, your voice muted.

He raises his head, turning over his shoulder and nodding, as if to direct you to come closer, and so you do.

Tonight’s visit isn’t vulnerable, or even pleasant. Marcus seems so distant as he dryly tells you about how he’s preparing, and his wishes to return safely. His eyes barely meet your own as he talks, and he continuously twists the ring on his finger.

It grows tiring, watching him ramble about politics you could care less about, listening to him say things that have nothing to do with him. He’s so far from the friend you thought you had made. When the air between you goes quiet, you don’t fill it for a while. You listen to the sound of the wind in the grass as his eyes still will not meet yours. It’s breaking you apart.

This is the last night you’re able to visit him, unless you visit Morpheus again. You will not waste it like this.

“What is ailing you, General?” You ask, deciding to prod more than you usually do.

To your surprise, he scoffs in light laughter.

“You,” he responds quietly.

His words don’t hurt, at least not yet. You have the option to walk away now, wake yourself and leave him with his final blessings, but of course you don’t.

“Me?” You ask, “what have I done?”

Marcus rolls his shoulders back, lifting his head to look into the everblue sky above the both of you.

“You have made my life difficult, Goddess.”

Difficult? You have made his life difficult?

You have half a mind to tear him to pieces, curse him with something awful like snakes for toes, or spoons for teeth. After all that you’ve done for him, all the safety you’ve provided, he is telling you that you make things difficult? How dare he? Be outraged, Goddess, for he disrespects the holy luck which you bestowed to him.

That’s what you should think, that’s how most of you should feel.

But instead you feel small, and hurt. Yes, he is disrespecting all that you’ve given, but also you feel like a failure. Your physical existence is because of him, because he did not let you fade. All you wanted to do was make his life easier, help him to have an eased mind and a safer life.

But instead, he’s telling you you’re difficult.

It feels like your body is shrinking in the white peplos you’ve worn, the sheer fabrics swallowing you. Shame is flooding in the form of tears behind your eyes, wetting your orbs with an unexpected outburst of emotion.

“I am sorry,” you manage weakly.

Marcus does not look at you while you cry, and you want to believe it is because he cares too much to watch, but you cannot verify that.

The wind picks up again, but it does nothing to hide the soft cries you can’t hold back. Once you were a fading Goddess, now you are just a failing one.

There is no luck involved with love.

Eventually he speaks again, with his head turned away from you.

“I am sorry too,” he says. There’s a finality in his tone that makes you ache.

So much is said in such little words. He is sorry to you, for you, and with you. A sorrow is shared between the two of you, knowing that your hearts ache for one another as they are worlds apart yet on earth together. 

This last berry was only supposed to mark the end of your visits, not the end of everything. It feels like this is all there is for the two of you, since it’s too complicated to continue on like this.

That’s why he doesn’t move away when you move closer and rest your head on his shoulder as tears leak down your cheeks, or at least that’s what you’ll believe. 

—

Time moves weirdly when you’re immortal, but it all happens so quickly.

Marcus stopped coming to offer things for you, and so you were blessing him less. Admittedly you had kept an eye on him, but not a keen one. It didn’t feel right, not when you and him weren’t… friends anymore.

But this feels too soon, too fast, too unfamiliar. Has your sadness caused you to be blind?

You watch as a man kneels in front of Marcus, panting and bloody with a sword beside him on the ground.

The only reason you are here was because you had felt the roar of a crowd all the way at your own temple, a wide distance away. It had drawn you in, and instead you had found this.

That roaring which you had heard crescendos to a new height around you as you shimmer into existence, cloaking yourself to the mortal eyes in the stands of the coliseum, but existing enough to touch him.

Arrows stick out of his front, more crushed beneath his back, as he is slumped on the white, gravel, ground. His hair is curled with tacky blood streaking through it, and he is so, so, still.

You drag your hand across his forehead, feeling the remaining heat, and in the echo of the crowd you begin to sob. 

Everything around you is moving, changing, fighting, and screaming, but you sit invisible in the center of the coliseum, running your hands over the now dead General Acacius. There is nothing you can do to bring him back, to ease Lucilla, to save him and apologize. He is dead beneath your fingers, with arrows lodged deep in his irreparable, mortal, flesh. 

You were supposed to keep him safe.

Hot tears run down your cheeks as you keep grasping at his armor, unable to move him or yourself. The last visit felt official, but this feels final. There is nothing more for you here, no friendship in a corpse.

Thoughts are running through your mind at the rate that your breath is puffing from your chest. The question of where he will end up in the afterlife is overwhelming you, and the chance for him to go to Elysium feels reasonable. It’s where he should be, where he deserves to go, especially after all he had done for Rome. You don’t even care why he’s here, or why he seems to have been brutally killed, but after the time you spent with him, Elysium seems right for him.

—

It’s where he should be. Elysium is where he should be.

And it’s where you find him.

His place there is somewhat similar to his and Lucilla’s home back in the mortal world, with lush greenery and airy drapes that flutter in various colours. It seems like he has left space for Lucilla here too, with space left in the chests for her things, and a permanently made half of the bed.

Elysium offers a true celebration of life for heroes, demigodly or not, and you’re sure Marcus has been enjoying that. Anything that he had been shackled to in his mortal life was gone now, and it seems that all he would have to miss is his wife. 

Most of your time is spent there, in his afterlife home. You peer from behind curtains when he comes back, hidden in drapes and keeping yourself small. 

He is already dead, but after the last time you abandoned him, you cannot bear to leave him alone again.

The vision of him, bloodied and murdered on the coliseum floor, flickers into your mind every time you see him lying in his bed. It’s an obsession to be near him, to be looking after him. Pluto might not even know you’re down here anymore, but what does it matter?

Marcus Acacius was the last living mortal to worship you. In the underworld, you are beginning to fade. Your fingers are slipping from you again, which is making it easier to lurk near him, but it is a painful process.

You want to speak to him. No longer do you yearn for his love, not after being in his home and seeing how dedicated his heart truly is to Lucilla, but you yearn to speak to him again. A panicked emotion runs through you at the thought of fading alone, of being entirely forgotten. 

It didn’t matter before he died, fading was just something bound to happen, but now it’s more. Is he forgetting you?

—

You’ve lost most of your arms by the time you work up the courage to speak up. Lucilla arrived sometime ago, joining Marcus in the afterlife. Watching them together brought some warmth to you, some kind of happiness that you couldn’t have for yourself, but seeing it for him was enough.

You sit on the terrace of their home, invisible to their eyes, and somewhat to your own. From the tips of your fingers to just below your elbows, you are a specter. Grey shadow fills where your limbs used to be, and they pass through all objects. You couldn’t tap his shoulder if you tried.

Oftentimes you sit, hidden, and ponder by yourself about more than Marcus. There were so many things you were adamant about when he was alive, and you regret it all now. Your determination to avoid your feelings, or at least not show them, and your need to not become attached… it bites at you now, a stinging, grieving, venom, that won’t leave. Your status as a Goddess blinded you to how tender that friendship could have been, and now you sit as a ghost spectator to his afterlife, obsessed with a mortal as a fading immortal. 

The tips of your fingers pass through the glass you try to grab as you think of this on the terrace. You’re glad that you’re such a minor deity, so at least you do not have to feel so humiliated about fading. A smile has just graced your face as you feel blessed for being so unimportant you can essentially stalk this mortal, when suddenly his voice cuts through the humid air of the space.

“Felicitas?” Marcus’ voice asks.

It’s so hesitant that you think you’re imagining it. You thought you had their home to yourself right now, thinking they had gone to do… whatever souls do in Elysium, but when you turn your face, he is there.

Marcus has not worn fancy clothing in a long while now, and right now is no different. He stands before you in a plain looking tunic, which just graces his knees. To see him at ease has been so nice, but he looks distressed at your sudden appearance.

You cannot find your voice as you awkwardly stand up, trying to think quickly. There is no good way to explain what you’re doing here, hidden away in him and his wife’s home. You could just vanish into thin air, but that feels wrong. He has seen you already, any attempts at pretending you aren’t here would be ridiculous.

His eyes scroll from your face down to your arms, and the smoking shadows that used to be there. Concern pinches onto his face with knitted brows and pressed together lips.

Something in you wants him to turn away, so you don’t have to think about why he is worried for you, even after all the trouble you caused, but he doesn’t.

His sandaled steps are heavy as he comes to you, reaching for your hands but finding the gesture fruitless as his own slip right through yours.

“Dulcissima,” he speaks weakly, shock woven in his words.

You had told him about fading a little while ago, when the two of you were in that field. Now it seems the severity of it has hit him.

What is hitting you is the name. Dulcissima, or sweetest. How long had it been since you had been referred to so fondly? All at once you are being remembered, recognized, and shown some affection. It feels like too much and tears are falling out of your control.

“I’m sorry,” you manage, “I was supposed to– to keep you safe.”

Marcus is shaking his head already, refusing your apology.

“No, no. You did keep me safe, you did. I pushed you away, I couldn’t control myself and I caused this,” he argues. 

It does not comfort you that you both blame yourselves. You wish to reach out to him and touch his face like you should have when he was warm and alive. You want to know if he is cold now, and it’s as if he hears you.

Marcus places a hand on your cheek, a softness in his eyes and hold that says that he missed you.

“I saw you,” he claims, “when I was on the ground. You were the last thing I saw.”

Somewhere between life and death for mortals, there are moments of godly clarity. Some see the light, others see their families and memories, but in that tiny glimpse of time, some see Gods. 

He was able to see you as you knelt over him, sobbing as you were cloaked to any mortal's naked eye.  You were the last thing he saw, and the last thing he truly regretted. 

All you can do is stiltedly nod at him, feeling like you were in trouble even though it seems he’s not upset.

For a moment, his eyes flick away, contemplative, but then he meets your gaze again.

“I told Lucilla of you, before I died. Not– not of my feelings which I struggled with, but that you were a close friend, a blessing in many ways.”

A blessing in many ways.

Another choked sob is wracked from your chest, your bottom lip curling out embarrassingly as your face contorts. He almost coos at you, the thumb on your cheek rubbing away your tears.

“Goddess, I have missed you,” he admits. 

Stupid nods are all you can offer, your voice imprisoned in your ever tightening throat which cries. When he was alive he was never this tender, too confused and insecure to ever touch you, but it seems he has been regretting things too.

“Felicitas,” he says quietly, “do you come here for ill reason?”

You shake your head this time, rather than nodding. You have no reason to be here, other than the fact that guilt has taken over your mind and heart since he died.

“Then relax, dulcissima. I have an offering for you.”

Marcus relaxes his stature, eyes still gazing over you. He looks at your fading palms and you watch him swallow nervously.

“I will worship you again, lending you offerings here, and all I ask in return is for our friendship again.”

It’s the opposite of how you met, almost completely, but it’s everything you need. You will not fade, he will not struggle in marriage, and you will have one another again. 

Again, you are nodding stupidly, but soon you’re embraced by him and nodding into his chest. His hands grasp at your back as he tells you how much he missed you in his final weeks, how he regrets losing you entirely, how he requires you as a friend. 

You are satiated in his arms as he comforts you, awakening you again there on the terrace. Unbeknownst to you, Marcus has let tears slip down too as he holds you close. 

“You will keep me safe here?” he asks jokingly.

It makes you smile, the idea of offering luck to a man who already died.

“Yes, General. I will keep you safe here, from all the horrifying glory and splendor,” you assure.

The two of you laugh, breaking the embrace but staying close. A passionate connection is still between the two of you, but in a different way now. Maybe when he was alive it was romantic because it is all you could think of, but through his death the two of you have come to understand it more. 

You require one another in a unique way, and leaning on one another does not have to be intimate the way he is with his wife. Marcus does need you, just as you need him, and now that you are both immortal in a way, you will never be separated again.

please leave a comment, like, reblog, askbox, or ANYTHING. i'd love to hear thoughts on this <33

tags (people who seemed excited for this) (sorry if these dont work)

@pascalssbabyy , @moonshapedflan , @gossipgirl-03 , @kyloispunk , @frannyzooey , @coocoolahh , @bug-boy32 , @honeymarvel , @magicalmorg , @1deakybass , @tuquoquebrute , @harryshousewhore , @teeagain, @chewie-bars , @vampyyweek , @queenslandlover-93 , @amijenn , @aquanatalie

[arceus-insanity]

Endeavor Deserves No Sympathy!

I don't understand how anyone can think Endeavor was ever a good dad. It also always comes off as incredibly victim blamie, especially towards Touya, and often Shoto too.

He literally only got married and had kids to use them. He never gave a shit about their well being, never even thought about it until he had the one thing he cared about and was still miserable. I've already gone over the math proving he gave up on achieving his dream himself at 21 at the absolute latest. (https://www.tumblr.com/arceus-insanity/763259515356512256/i-liked-endeavors-character-when-he-was?source=share)

And basic math will once again be used to prove just how little this waste of flesh actually tries.

This time the focus is on how quickly he abandoned Touya and immediately went to emotional abuse via neglect & literally replacing him, and once again risking that more children be born with self-destructive quirks.

For context we only see Endeavor doing anything with his kids that's not him literally walking through and ignoring them in two circumstances. Once when Fuyumi's a newborn and Touya is attempting to crawl (not walk) over to her. And training. Those are the only times he tries to spend with any of them, even after he starts his 'atonement'

Now comparing Touya in the scene of them training and himself as a toddler and all the child imagery this series loves to use instead of actually saving imperfect victims, Touya is at least 3 (probably closer to 4) when he's taken to the doctor and they are informed of his condition

Natsuo is 4 and a half years younger than him.

We know for a fact Natsuo (& Shoto) was conceived after they got the news, not willingly either. Pregnancy takes 40 weeks average, so Touya would still be 3 when Natsuo was conceived. So once again it took this 'man' less than a year to give up and have another child he hoped to use as a tool, and was explicitly making to hurt his existing son. And as I have said plenty of times before, risking that the new kids could be born with the same disorder, I hate how convenient it is that Shoto gets near zero negative quirk side effects.

Want to know what we never see, Endeavor doing something else with Touya and Touya demanding training, it's always him walking past/ away from Touya. Considering all of the shit they've pulled to soften Endeavor's abuse both in the manga and even more so in the anime, they wouldn't skip something like this. It's not hard to tell that Touya's 'obsession with training' is really about spending time with his dad, you know like a human child that literally needs love, proven by numerous studies and research in the real world.

He throws all parenting responsibilities onto Rei, adds more children to that load, and when Touya suffers for it (like everyone else) he does nothing, doesn't even hire a nanny

Another are you kidding me take I've seen is that somehow Touya's quirk issues are worse than Midoriya's and Yuga's. Touya managed to train his quirk to produce blue fire at 13 with zero equipment and less than no help, and only lost control of it, because of the mental abuse Endeavor had inflicted on him leading him to a mental breakdown. And/ or the theory I've only seen once of AFO using his ability to force quirk activation (seen with a passed out chapter 90 during his first confrontation with All Might)

Midoriya was breaking his bones all the way into the Shie Hassaikai arc and was only able to fight because Eri and was breaking support equipment in the following arc as well. Yuga had a support belt all the way back in the entrance exam and was still struggling with that.

Speaking of Yuga let's compare parental effort here, because as much as it backfired Yuga's parents tried a whole lot more. For starters they nearly bankrupted themselves to get him a quirk, so he could feel equal. All For One is a mythic man prior to his arrest, and those who knew of him were shown to be serious long-term villain groups, so they had gone to quite a bit of effort to find that he existed to begin with. They also got him support gear (the navel belt thing) as a kid to help him with said quirk, he literally had it in the entrance exam. Endeavor never looked into that, Endeavor is not only rich too but he's a top hero he would have direct access to support equipment companies that would jump at the opportunity and it never even occurred to him.

Endeavor's name is an irony as endeavour means to try hard to do or achieve something. He never tries hard he gives up incredibly quickly the second there's any road block, but instead of moving on he makes everyone suffer for it. He's a toxic pageant mom who'd rather force their child into a toxic world and a role they don't want than work on himself

And what finally makes him change? Getting exactly what he wanted and still being miserable, and he still expects through his actions his family to cater to him.

Not his son getting a major disability due to his actions, no, he decided to double down, mentally abusing and neglecting the son he supposedly loves, raping his wife who didn't want more kids or participate in this abuse, and again risking that Natsuo & later Shoto might have that same issue. Not when his wife breaks down and permanently scars his precious masterpiece, who proceeds to rightfully blame him, and he just thinks of it as a tantrum despite it lasting a fucking decade. Not when his eldest literally dies as the result of his selfishness. Not literally during any part of this entire process!

Dabi is 23 when Endeavor finally starts to 'try' to be better, that means that for at least 24 years he has only been caring about his fucking precious number one spot in a popularity contest that he couldn't even bother to try to be likeable for, this wasn't one bad decision, this was him constantly choosing to be so insanely selfish that he found ways that shouldn't even be possible for over two decades. And it was all him.

[meamiki]

okay here is the original ramble under the cut here! mainly doing these to the ones with associated textposts for different tagging systems tbh LOL

vvv

TLDR - The Universe keeps fucking with Loop and they are not really happy about it, regardless of timing.

While I haven't decided anything 100% concrete for Loop, the idea of a reverse isekaied Loop in general is interesting to me, so I'll be exploring that a bit here. Especially in terms of timing on when Loop gets taken out of their timeline. At least in terms of immediate outlook within this AU. So, for now, have a couple of those thoughts! 

---

The two main points in time I am currently considering are the following:

1. From when they gave up their original wish and made a new one.

In this instance, I feel like their arc would play a bit similar to in game

Seeing this new world as different & peaceful

Since they don’t have to deal with the loops anymore, just watch whatever happens.

Be a lil silly for funsies! The chaos that can ensue with a star being existing within a modern world! 

Even though it hurts to see Siffrin’s team hanging around, they really don’t have anywhere to go at the moment (hard to hide a star being in this type of world)

To a slow realization of how unfair this whole situation is. In comparison to all of the horrors they went through, this Siffrin has it so easy.

This Siffrin gets to live an idyllic life, free from the world calamity of being frozen & the literal time loop.

This Siffrin gets to freely hang around their family team, with no foreseeable "end" to being with them in sight.

This Siffrin had their original wish, the wish Loop wanted granted, handed to them on a silver platter. 

This Siffrin, nor anyone in this world, would ever be able to come close to understanding what Loop went through; Loop would never truly be seen in this world, not fully anyway.

What does The Universe have against them, to put them into this world and make them witness all of this?

It should have been them, with this carefree type of life, given all they went through.

2. AFTER the fight with Siffrin.

This leans a bit more lighthearted than the last, since Loop would have gone through all the development from the game via convos + the talk at the very end with Siffrin, and has a bit more peace about their whole deal.

Perhaps they would still see the same conclusions as above, since healing from the horrors would not happen all at once, if ever, with additional flavor

Underlying bitterness in why the script is still going. 

Why is The Universe asking for them to continue into a new world and role?

Haven’t they had enough, once making them witness another Siffrin’s loops and perfect ending, and now a completely idyllic Siffrin’s life from the get go?

However, there is also a bit of hope in the entire situation. Since if The Universe keeps deciding to fuck with them (as in, sending them to different world lines) there is still, technically, the chance of going backward as well.

To their original timeline and to their family.

Once could have been a one-off, but twice?

Perhaps three world jumps might be the minimum to go back, following standard wishing rituals?

More hope in this one from the get-go, with that thought in mind.

---

Though there are probably other points in time that would be interesting too! 

Another one I was considering was RIGHT BEFORE the fight with Siffrin, perhaps even mid-fight. However, I don't think that makes much sense for this particular AU ASAFASFASDAS. Can you imagine if Loop just spawned into this world, doesn't realize this is a completely different Siffrin, and attacks on sight?????

Honestly the idea of a reverse-isekaied Loop into different AU's in general is neat, would love to see other people's takes on it!!  Especially cuz of the various reactions/conclusions Loop could have/make based on the scenario/circumstances would be interesting, if that makes sense. At least I think there is something in that thought? I dunno!

I feel like I am missing some characterization bits in here, but that was the main gist of it for now since I cannot remember LMAO.

Mumblings over, thanks for reading my silly thoughts if you got this far!!!

a star being appeared in your apartment, wdyd?

(aka loop getting reverse isekaied into the modern office au)

also there are some scattered mumblings on loop in this AU under the cut actually in an rb now link right here if anyone's interested (spoilers for all of ISAT, including 2hats!)

[redsrooftopprincess]

SOBBINF I LOVE YOUR DISABILITY HEADCANONS SO MUCH,, MIKEY'S IS A STRAIGHT PUNCH TO THE GUT <33

May I possibly request reader x Mikey where they find out how he copes and helps make him feel more comfortable? Maybe they find him stoned and snuggles are just exactly what he needs at the moment? Possibly even attempting to help him through his unhealthier coping mechanisms? Bonus points if reader has depression as well!

Of course, no rush and you totally don't gotta do this if you don't want!! Headcanons or one-shot would be rad either way, if you are interested in this req!

Your writing is just so real and I love it so much oml. You are doing AMAZING (in general- as a fanfic writer as well I understand the effort that goes into this stuff and maintaining a regular life ontop of it) and thank you for all your hard work!!

I hope this is okay! 😅

Crushed

Warnings: Drugs/Alcohol, Inebriation

"That's what this is, isn't it? A drive by?" he says, standing, and putting his clothes back on. 

You're on the couch in the club's green room, after the best sex of your life. The party ended hours ago, and in your E induced haze, you'd taken his hand and dragged him down here. 

"What? No! Why would you-?" You swing your legs over the side of the couch and walk over to him a little unsteadily, "Mike, no..." He doesn't look up at you. "I mean... is that what you want it to be?" You ask, hesitantly.

"That's what it is," he says simply.

You swallow and inhale, tears threatening.

He finishes putting on his belt and looks up at you, he tries to ignore the tears in your eyes. Regret, that's all it is, that you ever let him touch you. It didn't matter, it was almost sunrise, "That's what it is," he repeats, "That's always what it is."

You hear it, the bitterness, the acceptance in his voice. He just doesn't have it in him to hide it tonight. It breaks your heart. "Michaelangelo, please..." 

"Look, it's almost morning. I gotta get back underground. I'll see you Wednesday," he said, not really sounding like he was looking forward to the next party. He leaves before you can protest further. 

He knows what you're going to say. He's a great guy, but he's not exactly normal, you know? He's not exactly someone you can bring home to meet the folks. And he really doesn't need to hear it. He gets it. He does. And he feels like shit would be a lot easier if he didn't. If he didn't know *exactly* how unwanted he is. Only good for a good trip, and a decent fuck, if you're feeling adventurous. He snatches a bottle off the empty bar as he makes his way out into the alley. 

It had to be you tonight. He already hadn't been in the best place when the party started, so there was no resistance when you took his hand. On a good day, you could lead him into hell, and he'd follow with a smile on his face. On a night like tonight, he'd thank you. You're friends, but in these circles the line between friend and lover blurs easily. You've slept together a number of times and he always leaves right after. You mean everything to him, so he'd let you do anything to him. Use him however you like. As long as he doesn't have to hear you let him down easy.

You dress quickly. You know what's happening. It keeps happening. He's shutting down. Shutting you out. He assumes you got what you wanted, end of transaction, and honestly the sex was great, it's *always* great, but what you want is him. Not sex. And your not letting him run away. Not this time.

You follow him down into the sewers, and find him sitting against the wall of one of the tunnels, knees curled up to his chest and tears staining the fabric beneath his eyes. You startle him and he tries to get up to face whatever might be attacking him, but stumbles, drunk. 

He sits back down once he realizes it's you. Now everything is so much worse. He never wanted you to see him like this. He didn't need you to feel bad for him. You ask him what's wrong and he doesn't want to talk about it. You say that's okay, and move the bottle out of reach, sitting next to him. 

You sit together in silence for a few minutes. You're terrified that saying the wrong thing will send him running from you faster. 

"Mike-" 

"I don't wanna talk about it, okay?" He gets up to leave, taking the bottle with him, and has to catch himself on the wall when he sways. 

You sigh and stand, but don't move to follow him, "Why not?"

"Because there's no point." 

"Why not?"

"Because you..." He looks at you and his heart clenches, he sighs, "forget it." He stumbles a few steps away and stops with a heavy sigh, "I can pretend all I want, and so can the rest of you, like I'm normal... I'm not," he turns around to look at you, his face a mask of escalating pain and injustice as his fists clench tight, "I'm not. I'm not normal. I'll never be normal..." he shakes his head with a sickening smirk, "It's just a game. Everyone gets dressed up to be freaks for a night and we dance and drink and trip and fuck, and at the end of the night, everyone else gets to stop playing and go home because they can. But I can't take the costume off," he says, grabbing his plastron where it meets his chest, "This isn't fucking make up. I can't even walk around in the FUCKING DAYLIGHT!!!" He roars, hurling the bottle he's holding against the wall of the tunnel, a shard of glass ricochets back and cuts his cheek. "I'm not a person. I'm the fucking party mascot." He spits, venomously,

You take a step forward, "Mike, you know that's not true." 

Bitter laughter echoes in the enclosed space. "Funny. That's... That's funny. Really. Because I've been coming to these parties, meeting people, for seven years now. I've watched *seventeen* people end up just like Sarah and Ben." Your friends had been celebrating their engagement tonight, Michaelangelo had introduced them at a party three years ago. 

"I don't get to have that... I'll *never* get to have that," he chokes, "even as a joke. Honestly, at this point I'd take a joke. I'm already pretending to be a person, wouldn't be that hard of a jump to pretend to be loved, too. I'd just have to find someone willing to lie to me..."

He trails off and the silence that hangs in the air once the echoes of his voice fades is heavy and oppressive. 

"Like I said, there's no fucking point..." He turns around and starts walking down the tunnel towards home, one hand on the wall for support. "Don't worry, I'll be back to all smiles by Wednesday. We can pretend like this never happened. This doesn't have to be a thing and you don't have to pretend whether or not it matters if I'm okay." He hears you take a step toward him, "Go home, Y/N," he calls back without turning around. 

Fine. If he's going to leave anyway, you have nothing to lose. "No." 

"Okay, fine," he sighs continuing down the tunnel, "do whatever you want." 

"Okay," you say, simply, as you begin to follow him. 

He stops, shoulders tight, face toward the ceiling, and sighs heavily, "What are you doing?"

"Whatever I want?" you reply, closing the distance. 

He turns to face you, tired and hurting. If you want to go another round, he isn't exactly in a place where he can say no. At the very least, he could use the dopamine. He used to imagine it would be different with you. He should have known better. Jaw tight, he sighs before reaching for his belt.

Your eyes widen as you realize what he thinks you're implying, your heart shattering all over again. You bring your hand up to rest gently on his, stilling his movements. His eyes meet yours. Hesitant. Guarded. Unsure of what you're playing at. Your hand tightens gently around his as you step forward, and he tenses as if he might run. 

You reach up, and pull him down into your arms. He stiffens for a moment, he's already hanging on by a thread, but he can't help it, it's you. Instinct takes over, wrapping his arms around you and buying his face in your hair. 

You feel his grip tighten as the dam breaks, and despite his best efforts at keeping his shit under control, a ragged sob rips through him. 

You hold him as he cries, moving the two of you back to sitting against the tunnel wall. Eventually, the tears dry up, and he pulls himself away. He quiet for a long time, and looks down at his hands in his lap. He can't even look at you, ashamed and embarrassed. You didn't deserve that. To feel obligated to take care of him. You have better shit to do than this.

You reach up and twist one of the tails off his mask around your fingers, tugging once, gently. It draws his attention, and he meets your eyes, begrudgingly. You reach up and wipe the blood from his cheek, meeting his eyes again. "I'm sorry," he whispers, "I'm sorry, I..."

You hush him gently and sit up on your knees. Taking his face in your hands, you bring him down to you, kissing his forehead. 

He doesn't get it. Why are you being so nice to him. You got what you wanted, why did you follow him? Why are you comforting him? Why do you even care? He looks at you in bewilderment. 

"Tell you what," you say, "I'm not super comfortable with the idea of leaving you alone right now, and it's going to rain, and I don't want to get flooded out down here, so... What do you say we head back to my place. I can order us a pizza, and we can watch a movie, and you can head home once you're feeling a bit more sober stable..." You smile, you hope persuasively. 

"Yeah... Okay..." He says, as you help him to his feet. You aren't wrong. It is going to rain, and as fucked up as he is, traversing this set of tunnels in particular will be a little iffy if the storm drains start to flood. 

You bring him home. You do exactly as you say. Pizza. Movie. Ice cream for good measure. He's not sure what to do. He's usually the one doing the entertaining, and now here you are making sure he was happy and comfortable. 

It takes time, but by the end of the movie, Mikey's mostly sobered up, both physically and emotionally. You even get a genuine smile out of him as sunrise looms and he begins to make his way out. 

"So... thanks... for this," he says, looking at you softly. It was probably the nicest thing anyone had ever done for him.

You smile, walking him to the window. "Anytime," you say, taking his hand and turning to face him as you come to the window, "and I mean that. Next time you get into that headspace will you do me a favor and try to reach for a phone instead of a bottle?" 

He smirks, nodding, "no promises, but I'll try."

"Thank you," you say as he reaches for the window. You touch his arm, gently "hey, one last thing," he steps back from the window to face you, and you stand up on your tiptoes and kiss him softly. It's simple, sweet, honest, "there's no reason you can't have what Sarah and Ben have," you whisper, before pulling away. 

He freezes. He's misunderstood. There's no way you're saying what it sounds like your saying, because it's what he wants you to be saying, so there's no *way* it could actually be what you're saying... Right?

You watch the torrent of emotions play out in his eyes, and you reach up to tug n on his mask. "Sunrise, Sunshine." You say. 

"Sunrise..." He repeats before he blinks, shaking his head, "Right. Yeah. Sunrise. I, uh, I'll see you -

"Wednesday."

"Tomorrow."

You say at the same time, before you laugh nervously under his gaze, "If, you know, you're not busy." You don't want to have to wait until Wednesday.

Hope flickers in his eyes. It's tiny and buried under so much hurt and insecurity, but it's definitely there, "I, uh, yeah... I mean, I gotta work, but I'll be wrapping up around two... so, if you're still up..."

"I'll be up," you say quickly, and he can't help but smile as both of your faces grow warm and you laugh gently. 

"Okay... I guess I'll see you tomorrow, then," he says quietly, almost in disbelief. Is this... What? What is this? He doesn't know, but it feels... better. Warm. Comforting. The things you said, the things you did for him tonight, this... He wants more of this. He'll do whatever he has to to have more of this. 

You can't help the grin that brightens your face. "Until tomorrow, then," you say, and kiss him one last time before he slips out into the desaturated predawn light, and is gone. 

.....

Tag list

@thelaundrybitch @the-cauldron-witch @fyreball66 @ninnosaurus @tmntngl @thegirlwiththeninjaturtletattoos @zagreustomb @ramielll @silverwatergalaxy @gornackeaterofworlds @daedric-sorceress @sophiacloud28 @iridescentflamingo @milykins

[themsource]

Some pining fiddlestan? 👀

I was initially going to write some angsty post-show fiddlestan, but I did happen across the whole mystery trio concept where the pines twins and Fiddleford move to Gravity Falls together, so I went with that idea instead ^^;

Hope you like it! XD

Missed Opportunities

Fiddleford looks at Ford like a man possessed.

And Stan can’t stand it.

There had been only one other time that a third person had been involved in the Jersey duo’s lives with any amount of significance, and that had been Carla McCorkle. Stan and Ford had had only one argument about her, and that had been it.

Ford had been laid out, tooth chipped and lip bloody, and Stan had been left looming over him in shock at what he’d done as he’d stared down at his battered knuckles.

She’d been cut out of their lives before you could say ‘Bankrupt’.

Carla hadn’t been so much stolen by Thistle Downe as more like just given away.

Ford, his brother, always came first.

Family always won out over a piece of ass.

So now, even years later, Stan doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t comment on the way Fiddleford blushes as he hands Ford a beaker filled with some strange nerd liquid as their fingers lightly brush. He doesn’t make a face or snort at how obviously flustered the country boy gets in his stuttered responses to his elder by fifteen minutes but dumber in ways of romance by twenty, twin brother. 

No, Stan grits his teeth, and pretends he doesn’t see it. Like he’s looking through plexiglass that wouldn’t so much as budge if he were to dare do or say something about any of it.

He can tell Ford has no clue, or if he does, that he’s clearly not interested. Stanford had always gone on about how romance and marriage, commitment of any kind really, was a waste of time. Time better spent unraveling the secrets of the universe. The same bullshit he’s been sprouting since they were sixteen and Ford had been humiliated to the point of trauma with that damned kissing robot he’d built.

He doesn’t see what Stanley sees.

The slight hitch to Fiddleford’s grin when he finds a solution to a problem, how Fiddleford slightly purses his lips right before discreetly letting loose some chewed tobacco into a small silver cup, the mesmerizing way the sunlight hits Fiddleford’s hair just right to highlight all those fine blonde baby hairs along the back of his neck and bath him in a halo.

More than that though is Fiddleford’s laughter, his thick accent that goes the slightest bit thin when he’s shy or nervous, his blue irises that glimmer with faint specks of copper when he’s caught up in a joke or riddle he enjoys.

He can’t understand how his brother can’t see it.

Doesn’t realize the gift waiting for him on the doorstep if he bothered to open the damned door.

Stan’s gaze tracks Fiddleford as he follows in Ford’s footsteps across the lab, his hand dancing meticulously across his clipboard as he notes down everything his brother says with a blinding smile that could make a cherub green with envy.

When Ford looks down from the machine he’s building to meet Fiddleford’s gaze, Stan feels his stomach twist into a knot. Fiddleford’s lips slightly part as he listens, a silent invitation if any while his eyes widen in an excited bewitchment.

He can’t hear what they’re saying, but he doesn’t need to with how fast Fiddleford’s lips are moving, how high strung he is as he bounces on the balls of his heels and waves his hands around in what Stan knows to be gestures laden with scientific input and jovial emphasis.

The whole time Fiddleford never breaks eye contact with Ford, not even once.

Stanley doesn’t understand why Fiddleford can’t look at him like that. He looks exactly like Ford, if you could forgive the mullet and having an actual sense of style. Truth is, he wouldn’t mind playing second (heh) fiddle to Ford. Stan likes to think he’s charming enough that he could get the taller brunette to fall for him eventually, to see that special something that he obviously sees in Ford, but for entirely different reasons.

It’s such a fucking waste seeing such a handsome man pine after someone that he can’t have.

But on the off chance that Stanley is wrong…

If Ford maybe does notice, and maybe does feel something for Fiddleford…

He can’t afford to screw up by making a move. If there’s one thing he can’t live without it’s Stanford, even if he’s sure he could live without him.

Every day Stan questions if Ford’s invitation to move here to Gravity Falls with him had been of his own accord and not out of some misguided sense of pity, because too often is he left alone to his own devices, too often is he forgotten about over the course of weeks except by Fiddleford.

There’s something dark, and ugly, in his chest.

Stan hates it.

“Stan? Stanley?”

He jolts, his focus snapping back as he realizes Fiddleford is standing in front of him, his sky blue eyes filled with a silent concern that instantly takes that dark ugliness he feels and sends it packing to whatever hell it reared its ugly head from.

“Uh, yeah, w-what’s up Fidds?”

Fiddleford watches him quietly for a moment, long enough Stan feels the fine hairs on his arms raise in silent warning before he eventually smiles.

It’s not that thousand walt grin Ford receives, but it’s enough to make Stan’s heart skip.

“I was askin’ if ya wanted ta go down ta town with me. We need more copper-hyperdelic insulators for the paramensional timespinner.”

Stanley has no idea what Fiddleford just said but he acts like he does as he smirks, “Sure thing bud! We can get all the coppermensional spinners you want!” 

Fiddleford raises a brow, but then lets out that soft laugh that Stan likes so much.

“Well, sounds like a plan, we better get on gettin’ then.”

Stan lets Fiddleford lead the way, taking a moment to peer back towards his twin who for all the world is lost, rapt with attention on his journal and none the wiser to how Stanley stands in the doorway envying him.

A part of him almost wants Ford to look his way, a brooding possessiveness in his eyes as he watches Stan take off with Fiddleford into far distances where he can’t keep an eye on them, knowing and hating the fact that they’ll be alone.

But of course, he doesn’t.

What a waste.

Stan clenches his jaw as he follows Fiddleford out.

[welldonekhushi]

"Separation" | PART I

WHAT IF: Instead of Jane, Vasili was kept under the Separation Drug?

To understand this plot even better, read Vasili's lore in the Black Ops 6!

Summary: Vasili Sokolov, formerly known as Bell, is held hostage in the Rook after going rogue, and gets tested under the Separation drug. He then reveals his reasons that made him join the Pantheon, their ultimate plan.. and somehow, a long-ongoing grudge.

Warnings: Just some potential BO6 spoilers? For those who still haven't played the game yet, and some profanity.

Note: Italic texts represent Troy and the rest communicating with Vasili. Red texts represent Vasili's alter ego trying to break the control of the drug in his system. And I'm only afraid that it didn't turn out to be how I expected it to be, but I tried my best to make it simple so I hope you understand.

[A distant voice was heard in the void.]

Marshall: Vasili.. do you hear me?

Vasili: What.. what's going on?

Marshall: It's Troy. I'm going to ask you some questions.

Vasili: What did you do to me?

Marshall: Adler calls it 'Separation'. Just relax.

Vasili: Is this some lame trick?

Marshall: Believe us. We really need you right now, Vince.

Marshall: Tell us about everything. We're all ears.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

The screen fades to black before a surreal image emerges through the scene. Vasili waking in a fractured, void-like realm. The atmosphere is chaotic, with fragmented platforms suspended in the abyss, shattered buildings, and distorted surroundings drifting aimlessly in the darkness.

Marshall's voice echoes through the desolation. "This is your true self, separated out from the rest. We need your help, Vasili."

"There's a bioweapon. And someone is planning to unleash it through some kind of attack. Can you tell me about it?"

Vasili hesitates, his voice uncertain. "I can try. But, I would never do something like that.."

Marshall presses gently. "Where are you right now?"

Vasili's mind flickered. "I'm home."

Vasili’s gaze fixed onto his old home in the distance, its facade fractured, yet hauntingly familiar. Carefully, he stepped across the unstable, crumbling platforms. Reaching the warped doorstep, he hesitated before gently pushing the door open. The hinges groaned, and beyond, his childhood room unfolded, a snapshot frozen in time.

Standing at its center was a younger version of himself, wide-eyed and unscarred by the burdens of the future.

There, he saw her. Eva, his mother entering the room. She smiled as she pulled his younger self into a warm embrace, a quiet moment of love frozen in time.

Vasili’s throat tightened, his voice barely a whisper trying not to break. "Mama."

"I was so happy, but—" Vasili’s attention was drawn to a glowing mirror in the corner of the room, its light calling him to uncover the truth. He moved toward it, his hands reaching out, ready to touch the surface.. until something stopped him.

The older man watched the heartfelt moment unfold, one that brought him an unexpected sense of comfort and delight, free from the burdens and worries of the world. He seemed.. truly happy, and it made Vasili want to hold onto this one, single moment forever. The figures disappeared in thin air, signifying they were all just memories. Even if they had gone distant.

"Stop it, Mama!" Little Vasili was getting tickled by his mother, playfully.

Vasili's eyes widened in fear as he saw a hand grapple his arm, turning around to see his younger self, staring back at him with an unsettling awareness. The child's eyes, once innocent, now darkened to a tar-like black, twisted with a wicked smile. The distorted, yet mature voice that followed sent a chill down his spine.

"Welcome back, Vasili."

Suddenly, the reality before him began to fracture. Cracks splintered through the air, distorting the scene as the floor beneath his feet shattered. In an instant, Vasili held onto his younger self's arm, but instead he let him go, the ground giving way and sending him hurtling into the endless void below, shrouding him in the darkness along with a shrill silence.

"But then?" Troy's voice cut through the stillness, steady and probing. "What even drove you to do all those disastrous things?"

"Revenge."

"No.. not revenge!" Vasili’s voice trembled, a mix of defiance and uncertainty. "There is still so much that I don't understand."

He wakes up with a sharp inhale, and coughed for air, finding himself on another fractured platform, the impact jarring him. Around him, new fragments emerge, which were the pieces of his old life. A KGB dossier drifts past, along with broken picture frames and faded documents. He steadies himself and presses forward.

"I need to go to work.. maybe I’ll find answers where it all began."

The fragmented world twists again, forming the skeletal outline of the KGB headquarters. Vasili steps inside, the dim corridors feeling strangely alive. The faint whispers of his past missions echo in the shadows, and mannequin-like figures of agents stand frozen in eerie poses, their hollow gazes following his every move.

"It was my passion and dream to join the KGB. All my education and efforts are devoted to this very day.. to see myself as a Major."

"Do you see anyone familiar?"

"I need.. I need to find Belikov," Vasili muttered, his voice strained. "I have to know if he's okay.."

"Why do you even care for him?"

"He's my friend."

"Belikov and you were together?"

"Since the beginning. When I joined the KGB."

Vasili moved through mannequin-like agents, their lifeless poses adding to his growing unease. His search for Belikov felt futile, but he pressed on.

"You're getting away from the topic, Vincent!" Woods's voice rang sharply in his mind.

"You don't know anything!" Vasili shot back, his frustration boiling over. Even if he was straying from the topic, he needed to believe he wasn’t alone in this broken reality. There among the figures, he finally met his eyes with that one familiar presence, that relieved him from his fear, waving at him.

"Vasya!" Belikov's cheerful voice rang into his ears. The man sighed in relief, approached him at full speed, grabbing his shoulders.

"Dima.." Vasili scanned the man before him, searching his face, his posture — anything to confirm if it was truly Belikov or just another cruel illusion.

"I was just looking for you, and oh! Anton Charkov's waiting for you in his office," Belikov said with a casual tone.

"What? Did something happen? Or was it one of your mishaps?" Vasili asked, his suspicion lingering.

"What? Not at all!" Belikov chuckled. "But... he looked serious. Not disappointed, though. You should check on him."

"Alright. And you? Where are you headed?"

"President Gorbachev is waiting for me upstairs. I need to get there soon, but I thought I’d inform you about Charkov’s message first."

"Alright, I’ll catch you later." Belikov squeezes Vasili’s shoulder, before disappearing into the shadows. Vasili watches him go, the unease starting to creep within him. The warmth of the encounter feels too real to be a fabrication, yet too perfect to trust.

"General Charkov.. he announced my retirement request," Vasili murmured to himself, his voice heavy as he pieced together the fragments of his distorted reality.

"Charkov was then murdered by poison when you left." Woods’s voice interjected, sharp and cutting. "Then they thought you had murdered him."

Vasili, now outside the headquarters, clutched the documents Charkov had handed him after relieving him of duty. His steps slowed as a memory surfaced. "But I saw something before I left."

"What did you see?"

The reality around Vasili shifted into slow motion, each step dragging as if time itself had fractured. He passed by a figure, their presence pulling at his focus. Something about them felt familiar, almost tangible. Vasili slowed, his gaze narrowing as he tried to make out their face.

But no matter how hard he looked, the face remained blurred, as if the very memory refused to take form. It was an agonizing blank, teasing him with a truth just out of reach, and it walked away from Vasili, the man still staring at him.

PAUSE.

"Your only enemy."

"I missed it. I need to think about it again."

Reality rewound itself, pulling Vasili back to the exact moment he had passed the agent before leaving the headquarters. Time dragged, each detail sharpening as the blurred face began to take form.

It took a few agonizing seconds before recognition began to creep in. The features slowly emerged from the haze, piece by piece, like a puzzle assembling itself in his mind. The surrounding sounds warped and distorted, rising in a chaotic crescendo as the image finally came into focus, the truth staring back at him. The face was blurred out but the prime features of the man reflected to him.

Those gold shades. That scar on his left face.

"I knew him." Vasili spoke gruffly, as the vision around him erased in front of him. "My enemy."

"Whose him?" Troy asked the man, curiously. "Who was your enemy?"

Suddenly, a sharp ring of a bell echoed behind him. Vasili turned, his breath hitching as he came face-to-face with another version of himself. He knew those eyes, black as tar — and that cracked, distorted face.

"Why do you even care, Marshall? He was never cooperating with you, but me."

(a rough sketch, appearance of Vasili's alter ego formed during the Separation drug)

"Fuck!" Vasili’s head throbbed, hearing the same sharp ringing of the bell again as all of his memories surged, which started to drag him forcefully to a stretcher beneath a glaring surgical lamp. The harsh light stung his eyes, turning away from it as his vision blinded.

"Don't you remember what they did to you?" The voice of Vasili's alter ego cut through the silence. He paced himself around the stretcher. He blinked, the safehouse coming into focus. This wasn’t the Rook at all, and he was certain of that.

"I need to give them answers!" Vasili protested, but his alter ego loomed over him, its presence unyielding.

"It's only a matter of time before you break free from this drug, Vasili." He moves closer to Vasili, tilting his head as he smiles. "And I'll be back in control." The entity dissolved in thin air, as the bell sharply rings in the background again. Vasili gets up from the stretcher, seeing a distorted reality ahead of him when he steps out of the safehouse.

"Think harder, Vasili. How is it that you don't remember anything again?" Woods's voice spoke to him.

"As they said, I was always a tool," Vasili muttered, bitterness edging into his words as he rants.

"Is the MK-Ultra still in effect?" Woods asked.

"It always has." Vasili croaked, escaping the room with the help of a ladder in front of him. "Couldn't even guess if it's really me, or someone else."

Reaching the end of the ladder, Vasili had finally reached outside of the safehouse, seeing all the fragmented, distorted and broken elements scattered around his reality.

"Try however you want. You'd never find any answers."

"As if I'd never try, mudak." Vasili growled at his alter ego, whose mocking gestures cut deep. He suddenly froze, the scene drastically shifting around him. The air grew thick as reality itself began to warp, distorting around Vasili like liquid. One moment, he was in a fractured, floating realm. The next, he was pulled through a dark tunnel, his surroundings flickering between his crumbling childhood home and empty voids. Time and space warped, creating a disorienting blur of broken moments. The world seemed to shift at will, leaving Vasili struggling to grasp what was real.

The world continued to twist and fracture around Vasili, as though each step was a battle to keep his footing. Amid the chaos, a massive laboratory door loomed ahead.. cold, foreboding yet painfully familiar. It felt like a door from another life, one that could offer answers or more confusion. Below him, on the ground, sat a small chest. Kneeling down, his hands shaking, he opened it carefully, revealing a letter tucked inside. The paper was old, its edges frayed, as if it had been waiting for him to discover it all this time.

"After my retirement, Perseus brought me in." Vasili murmured. "He wanted to guide my career, offering me a higher position within his faction."

He pushed open the heavy door, stepping into the hallway of the Perseus stronghold, its emptiness echoing around him, bringing him a feeling of unease.

"My life was about to change.." Vasili continued, his tone heavy with regret. "Hoping I had another reason to serve my people." He paused, bitterness creeping in as he started to hear echoey voices of the past.

A voice echoed in the background. "But I have other plans for you. Perseus thinks too highly of you."

"But who knew I was serving my loyalty.. all this time for a bunch of snakes."

"I don't want the competition."

Vasili spun around, but before he could actually act upon, it was too late. Arash Kadivar stood behind him, gun aimed with deadly precision. The shot rang out, and Vasili groaned in pain — realising that he had never hit the bullet. He was all normal in one piece, but then all his surroundings started to explode and destroy itself, as the man started to escape the facility, breaking in through doors through doors, as the voices flooded his ears.

"Comrades.. The United States and its allies slowly consume that which is dear to us."

Perseus’ voice reverberated in Vasili’s mind like a haunting refrain, the words spilling from his own lips as they mingled with the deafening roar of explosions tearing through the facility. Each step forward felt like a battle for survival as he searched desperately for an escape route amidst the chaos.

“Marshall, we’re losing him!” Woods’ voice cut through the cacophony, strained and urgent.

“Once we control the Greenlight arsenal, we will detonate them all from the safety of Solovetsky.” Perseus’ vow lingered, a specter of the mission that had led them all here.

"Stay.. out from my head!" Bursting through the final set of doors, Vasili was met with a startling vision. Perseus, in it's distorted form stood ahead, standing in front of him from a distance. Without hesitation, Vasili charged forward, forcing his way through the oppressive, crumbling reality around him.

He stumbled out into the open, his chest heaving as he collapsed to his knees. Gasping for air, he coughed, each breath ragged and desperate after the chaos he had just endured. Then, a change. He paused, realizing the air around him had shifted—it was fresh, clean, and pure, unlike anything he had felt in what seemed like an eternity.

Vasili lifted his face slightly. The sunlight struck his face, a harsh yet liberating contrast to the suffocating smoke inside.

"Vasili, are you alright?" Marshall asked, concerningly.

Vasili had gone still for a while, admiring the fresh Arctic breeze filled his lungs, and for a brief moment, he felt a sense of freedom he had always longed for. But as he took it all in, his eyes caught a faintly glowing mirror at the end of the cliff. The same mirror he saw back in his room. He could feel it.. the mirror was about to reveal the truth.

"I can finally know the truth. It's in front of me."

Marshall and Woods were eager to know about what Vasili had for him in store, despite the distractions — and his own anger and past trauma, coming in between. Vasili could reach his hand over the surface, until..

“Heroes have to make sacrifices. That’s why I’m asking you for one more, Bell.”

The voice froze him in place, sharp and unrelenting. Vasili turned, his breath hitching as realization dawned. Standing before him, was a figure — with the same shades, and scar on his face. The figure illuminated by the sunlight, revealing it to be Russell Adler. His heart raced, each beat pounding louder than the explosions behind him. Panic gripped him, and his hands began to tremble uncontrollably.

“Adler..” He whispered, the name holding disbelief and dread. “Don’t do this.”

“Adler? Was this all about him? Vasili—Vasili, calm down!” Marshall’s voice broke through, but Vasili barely heard him. He shook violently, his mind dragged back to the moment that had shattered his world.

“Woods, we need to stabilize him!”

“Please..” Vasili begged, his voice cracking with desperation. “I beg of you—don’t.”

Adler’s expression hardened. “I’m sorry, Bell. But it was never personal.”

The gunshot rang out, splitting the air with an unbearable finality. Vasili flinched, ducking instinctively as the sound left his ears ringing painfully. For a brief, harrowing moment, he braced for the impact—but none came.

Vasili opened his eyes slowly, his breath still unsteady, and what he saw made him freeze in disbelief.

There, before him, stood Bell. Who saved him from getting shot under the agent's hands. Bell had Adler lifted by the neck, his feet dangling helplessly in the air as he gasped for breath. "Bell?!" Vasili shouted.

“I thought you wouldn’t do the expected.” Bell said, his voice cold and unrecognizable, laced with fury. “So I interfered.” His glare bored into Adler, seething with the weight of betrayal and anguish. “You’ll finally know what it feels like to be in our place, you monster.”

Bell turned his gaze to Vasili, his expression unreadable, a mix of determination and something far more unsettling. “We’ve got a job to do.” He declared, his voice ringing with finality.

Suddenly, a sharp, piercing bell tone echoed through the air, as Bell and Adler flickered unnaturally, glitching away from existence before vanishing altogether. The cold Arctic air filled the void they left behind, leaving Vasili standing alone, stunned and silent.

"Adler.." Vasili murmured, his voice barely audible, the weight of realization sinking in. "He's gone. Bell took him away."

"What are you going to do?" Marshall asked him.

Due to the transmission, a fractured dimension began to take shape, where Bell had escaped with Adler.

Behind him, the mirror’s glow intensified, beckoning Vasili to step through the portal, promising to reveal the full truth about the Pantheon. Yet, something held him back. A sense of unease settled within him, and he hesitated. The pull was undeniable, but he couldn’t shake the feeling of conflict, the growing reluctance to face what lay beyond.

To be continued?

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Congrats on wrapping up the Cursed Raven Saga!! 🎉 I had a lot of fun reading it. One thing I loved was how Miss Raven has different relationships with every character. A lot of the saga was focused on just her and J Word though so I wanted to ask if you could clarify what her relationships are like with the other characters especially the ones we don’t see a lot of in the saga or not at all. Sorry if it’s a big ask, I’m just curious! You can do just the 22 NRC boys for now if you want. 😊

[Referencing this series!]

AAAAAAH THANK YOU FOR LIKING IT, I'D LIKE TO THANK THE ACADEMY 😭💐

Having a character with very different relationships with the rest of the cast makes them feel more "real", doesn't it? Miss Raven doesn't get along with everyone! I spent a long time thinking about how she would interact with the others in the cast. A lot of those relationships are complicated or change over time, which is why I decided to explain each individual one rather than slap together a quick chart. The NRC students, staff, and a few key characters are included. I hope you enjoy reading ^^

Riddle

They’re very awkward friendly acquaintances. If you asked either one of them though, they’d deny it and instead claim they just have a professional relationship.

They initially get to know each other via dorm meetings (as Raven attends to take notes); Riddle likes that she does her job and stays focused. He sometimes nags his freshmen students to be more diligent and to follow her example.

They take tea together occasionally and complain about the eels. Riddle has to deal with them all the time—one as his classmate, the other approaching him at random, much to his chagrin.

Not sure how to deal with him when he’s mad. Raven locks up out of fear but attempts to talk him back into a state of calm. Sometimes just cowers.

Frequently tells Raven it is “ill-advised” to associate with the twins.

Trey

Acquaintances out of convenience, I’d say? Raven and Trey don’t talk much themselves, but Trey appreciates that she’s Riddle first “new” friend at NRC.

Raven sees Trey has a reliable senpai, but doesn’t really have reasons to talk to him outside of business. She tries not to bother him since it looks like he’s already got a lot on his plate dealing with his own dorm members.

Trey uses her as a waste receptacle taste tester for his latest creations whenever he feels the Heartslabyul boys have had their fill of sugar. “Ravens can basically eat anything right? Here, have some of this then.”

Cater

Calls Raven "Rae-chan".

They’re not close at all, but they’re aware of the other person’s existence. The two don’t vibe so well…

Raven’s an introvert that doesn’t really understand Cater’s sparkly persona and social media obsession. Cater doesn’t get why a cute girl like Raven doesn’t show off more.

Cater isn’t entirely comfortable around her because sometimes it seems like she’s staring at him… It makes him feel like he’s an open book and she’s examining him for flaws or seeking out something more of him. He really plays up his persona around her to compensate and to cover for that.

Ace

Classmates but not friends. He’s more like a bully. Raven tolerates him because they share the same homeroom. She thinks of him as an annoying little brother she has to "model" the correct behavior for.

He’s constantly teasing her for a variety of things: being short, being a brainiac, being related to the useless headmaster, etc. Raven tries to be the bigger person and ignore him, but there’s only so much she can take before snapping at him.

Occasionally steals glances at what she’s writing in her diary or snatches it from her to read the entries out loud. Tells her she has shit taste in men.

Raven thinks she’s more mature than Ace, but Ace sees right through her “lady” act and points out she’s more childish than she’d like to admit. He says she should be more honest with herself, but she never is. She probably avoids Ace if given the choice because she doesn’t like her lies/tsundere behavior being called out.

Deuce

Classmates, closer to being an acquaintance than Ace is. Though they’re not exactly friends, Raven thinks of Deuce a little more positively because it’s usually him who intervenes to tell Ace to “cut it out” or to “leave her alone”.

Deuce looks up to Raven as the honors student ideal. (Raven gets a slightly swelled ego because of this and thinks of herself as Ace and Deuce’s “big sis” figure.)

When he goes delinquent mode, Raven cowers in the corner until he has returned to normal. Can’t totally understand some of his delinquent slang. Probably repeated a few of the phrases to ask what they mean and Deuce apologizes for saying them in front of her.

She once heard that Deuce likes eggs and she looked at him horrified.

Leona

Calls Raven “Canary”. It's meant to be an ironic nickname, since despite her black feathers she tries to be bright and optimistic with him.

They started off having a really sour relationship because Leona has an attitude that Raven finds is difficult to work with. She sees a lot of her old self in him (disheartened, lost, not willing to try) and takes it upon herself to encourage him because she doesn't want to see him going down the same dark path she did. Unfortunately, Leona doesn't appreciate that he's her "charity case" and tends to put up resistance to her efforts.

Raven's REALLY skittish around him since he's a big cat and she's a bird--they're naturally predator and prey.

Leona saw her as super annoying back then; he doesn’t understand why she has so much faith in him when he has given up on himself. This frustration manifests in a few threats which definitely did not help the relationship.

Over time, I guess the two realize on their own how similar they are and they sort of soften up to one another. Leona starts to treat Raven a little nicer and finally acknowledges her for the "lady" that she is. "I can't quite place it, but Leona-san seems to be different somehow," she says. In a good mood + feels proud when she sees him in high spirits.

Raven really praises his intelligence and leadership abilities, but laments that he doesn't use them to their full extent.

They can bond over intellectual activities or something. Chess, reading books, etc.

Still get on each other's nerves by making verbal jabs. I guess that's the nature of a cat and bird, huh... Their relationship is very "Zazu-Scar" and "Beauty and the Beast" coded.

He's aware that she has a crush on Jade 💀 Angsts in private about not being "the one", why couldn't he have had this kind of support earlier in life, etc.

Ruggie

An acquaintance, forced to be cordial with him due to circumstances. Raven's often around campus doing odd jobs for her uncle, and she sometimes bumps into Ruggie (doing his own odd jobs). They chitchat here and there, but aren't super close.

Raven initially views Ruggie as "one of Leona-san's goons", but they become a little more amicable as Raven's relationship with Leona improves. Ruggie now comfortably teases her and commends her for putting up with the demands of their dorm leader.

He was the mediator for Leona and Raven back they didn't get along at all, asking Raven to cut Leona a little slack and telling Leona to lighten up with the birdie.

They share a love for shiny things and have a talent for finding edible plants. Sometimes they trade tips on the latter.

Jack

Raven's scared of Jack based solely on the principle that he looks intimidating. The first time they ever crossed paths, Raven took out her wallet and handed it to Jack (thinking that he was going to wail on her for her lunch money). He was very confused and handed the wallet back to her.

They don't talk. Like, at all. They only communicate on an as-needed basis, and even then it's difficult to get the ball rolling because Raven just freezes up when he looks at her. Jack very much reminds her of the wild predators she'd have to avoid in the forest.

She thinks it's cute when his ears twitch and his tail wags, but doesn't dare get close to him. Would prefer to stand on the other side of the room and shout at him.

... Jack doesn't get why she acts this way, isn't this way of communicating inefficient?

He tries to remain respectful of her since it seems like (in his eyes) she's friends with Ruggie-senpai and Leona-senpai. Wonders if there's something more there that he's not fully getting, but figures it's none of his business to ask about it.

Azul

Thought he was polite at first, but Raven eventually came to understand that his smile is, in fact, shady. She maintains a certain level of professionalism (given that he's a dorm leader), but she's pretty on edge around him otherwise. If he's nice to her, she assumes he wants something or has an ulterior motive.

Azul sees a lot of value in Raven due to her connection with the headmaster. He's always reaching out to her and 'offering" favors or items to get in her good graces. Often is rejected, but man doesn't know when to quit.

Though Raven doesn't like Azul or what he stands for, she thinks the Mostro Lounge is very comfortable and dines there on occasion. (Insists on paying full price when Azul tries to slide over a discount.)

Jade

Her crush

When Raven first arrived at NRC, she got really attached to Jade since he seemed like a kind and reliable gentleman. They had a falling out (after Raven learned that Jade was sent by Azul to manipulate her) and have been on rocky terms since. Unfortunately, a (very stupid) part of her is still attracted to him, though she strongly denies it.

He derives a lot of amusement from her overreactions to little things, like having their fingers brush against one another.

Raven keeps Jade at as much of a distance as she can. Sadly, he keeps popping up in her life (all orchestrated coincidences) to charm her. She convinces herself that he doesn't actually like her and that these are all calculated moves to get back on her good side.

Many of their interactions devolve into bickering, with Jade teasing her and Raven trying to fire back with something witty.

They're curious about each other's home biomes and true forms. Back when they were friends, they'd teach each other many new things on those topics.

Very vengeful towards those who are "too cruel" to Raven (because only he's allowed to be that mean to her :>). Offers to "take care" of them for her. She tells him not to, but isn't sure if he actually listens to her.

Floyd

Calls Raven “Black Pearly”/“Kuroshinju-chan”. Normally Floyd nicknames people after sea creatures--and notably, with Raven, he calls her an inanimate object from the ocean. This is intentional (from a meta perspective), as it highlights that Raven is an entity that doesn't quite "fit" within the school and the story.

Raven's not a fan. She can't deal with Floyd acting so unpredictably and rashly. He's such a headache, why can't he at least PRETEND to be polite like Jade does? (This comment really pisses Floyd off and makes him stomp off.)

He thinks she's boring but keeps starting shit to see if she'll react if he pokes the right buttons.

Makes fun of her because he sees her crush on his twin is sooo obvious. Doesn't understand why she has to overcomplicate things by hiding how she really feels. "Just do it already."

Kalim

Friends! But in small doses. Raven gets tired being with Kalim, who’s always so friendly and energetic, for extended periods of time. Cares for him in the same way a big sister might for a younger brother, even though Kalim is in the higher grade level.

Showers her with gifts, especially foods. He shows her his menagerie and encourages her to try petting tigers or something 💀 Kalim had a big heart and shares a lot of what he has with her.

He listens to her worries about connecting with others and fitting in. Not good at wording his advice, but encourages her to keep trying and that he’ll always be there for her!

Raven finds Kalim’s cheer refreshing but worries that people could take advantage of his naïveté like she was (by Jade). Tries to protect him from shady types of characters.

Jamil

Not exactly friends, but they see each other and immediately see the tired mom energy. There’s a mutual understanding between them.

Raven takes shifts with Jamil to help Kalim with his assignments. Helps keep an eye on his dorm leader when he’s up to his neck with other tasks. It’s like they’re coparenting 😭

She often finds herself staring at his hair accessories. When she was less accustomed to human life, she yanked on one of them and earned his ire for the next several weeks. Jamil has cooled off since then, but he’ll bring it up subtly if he’s annoyed with her.

Vil

Calls Raven “Shetland potato”. (Yes, I know Shetland is an irl location that doesn’t exist in Twst; just assume Shetland is an old fashioned way of saying Shaftlands/it’s a variety of potato from the Shaftlands.)

She approached Vil first and nervously asked him for etiquette lessons (since she wanted to know how to be more human and “ladylike”), which he agreed to. Vil’s pleasantly surprised that she had the agency to seek self improvement like this, so now his expectations of her are set really high.

Raven admires Vil’s mastery of potionology and tries her best to emulate him in the lab. Her technique is a little clumsy, but her heart’s in the right place. She also loves his sense of fashion since she lacks the confidence to pull off the daring looks that Vil does.

He’s like the stern, icy older brother she never had. Vil doesn’t go out of his way to help her out (he wants her to learn to fend for herself), but he’s there if she needs advice or help dressing for an occasion.

One of the few guys she can go to for “girl talk”. Raven tries to keep who she’s talking about vague, but Vil always sees right through her and tells her it’s a poor choice.

Rook

Calls Raven “mon petit oiseau”. Later on (like, after Raven becomes more confident in her identity), he'll switch over to the nickname "Conteuse des Corbeaux".

A good friend! If not a little too over eager. Raven was definitely put-off but him at first, but he grew on her over time. She loves listening to him wax poetic; it inspires her in her own creative endeavors—and his cheer is so infectious!

They share a love for the arts and sit around trading their takes on the latest movie or play or art piece they saw. Sometimes he reads and offers critique of her latest work.

Lives for the tea. Besides Vil, he’s one of the other guys Raven can talk to about love. Problem is, Rook is content watching her try to find her way (there’s something romantic about it!) and vaguely encourages her to “follow her heart’s desire”.

Tries to give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe too much. (“I-I’m sure Rook-senpai has a perfectly good reason for breaking into your dorm room to leave a rose on your pillow… r-right?”)

They sometimes whisper stuff to each other in bird.

Epel

Epel has beef with her cuz she's a raven (aka one of those pest animals that wreak havoc on his village's crops!). Stares at her from a distance with kind of a grumpy face.

He doesn't really act on that beef because Vil will whoop his ass for being rude and provoking a fight with his peer. If he's in a situation where he has to talk with Raven, Epel will do his best to put on that soft, sweet polite facade that Vil has taught him.

Raven has zero clue what Epel's saying when he speaks in his accent. Asks him to repeat himself, which annoys him.

Idia

Raven thinks he’s basically a ghost that haunts Ignihyde. Does that guy ever go out and get sunshine??? (Raven thinks that, but she’s a hypocrite because she also holes up in her room… writing…)

Doesn’t really have an opinion of him since he’s so withdrawn and they barely interact. However, she doesn’t like it when he acts all high and mighty about the media he consumes. Raven thinks it discourages people from giving the media a shot because he’s making it seem so unappealing.

She also thinks his laugh and general presence is

a little eerie. Maybe she’ll get cursed if she bathes in his negative miasma for too long.

Even though they don’t know each other irl, I think it would be funny if Raven posted her writing online and Idia was one of her biggest fans 😭 Like this guy religiously likes, comments, and shares every post…

Ortho

Calls Raven “Raven Crowley-san”.

They’re friends! Little buddies experiencing a lot of their firsts and exploring the world and its oddities together.

Ortho is very pragmatic while Raven has a big imagination and tends to daydream. They balance each other out well.

He tells Raven about his older brother (which is how she first learned about Idia’s existence.) “Eh… Ortho-san, you have a difficult sibling like that…?” She feels bad for him 💦 but respects him for having the patience to deal with that.

Ortho thinks Raven’s an interesting subject to observe and gather data on. It’s not every day that he gets to do this! He’ll be sure to collect accurate readings on her.

Malleus

Calls Raven "the young Crowley".

Because Malleus is often missing from dorm leader meetings, Raven has to either go fetch him for them or deliver the meeting notes to him. He’s thankful for her help but doesn’t engage with her outside of these instances.

Raven is pretty neutral about Malleus?? She respects him and all, but doesn’t get involved with him more than she thinks she should. Malleus is the same way with Raven; he doesn’t think much of her beyond her duties.

Malleus was slightly amused by Raven standing up to him during GloMasq; he announces his intent to strike Rollo down but Raven insists they hear him out. Since then, he’s kept an eye on her and wonders if she’ll have the audacity to do it again.

I imagine that Raven goes to Briar Valley to serve as a royal scribe or messenger for Malleus in her fourth year internship. This would lend them a Maleficent-Diablo dynamic.

Lilia

Acquaintances, mostly because Raven communicates with him about dorm leader meetings or sometimes passes meeting notes to him if she cannot find Malleus herself.

He commends her for being a bright girl but thinks she could make do with loosening up a little. Takes delight in popping up out of nowhere to spook her.

Believes that Malleus and Raven are friends. (They’re not.)

Lilia jokingly asks his boys who they think os cuter: Raven or him? It’s definitely him, right? 🥺

Raven has the inkling that Lilia is a lot older than he seems just based on the stories he tells when he has the chance to. She loves listening to them and dreams about traveling to those places too.

Silver

Friends, but not right away. Raven used to be scared of Silver because he looks intimidating when he stares at you. Still, she feels oddly drawn to him anyway. It must be his princely aura drawing in all the local wildlife… including her 😭 For a long while, she just observed Silver from a distance.

Once she learns Silver’s actually very normal and even sweet (most likely from the neighborhood birds), Raven settles in nicely by his side. For example, she might work on writing while Silver dozes off beside her on a warm afternoon.

Models some characters in her stories off of Silver. He’s so gallant! (Raven complains that the other NRC students should be more like him. Silver doesn’t understand what she means.)

He’s dense, but he’s a good boy. Will help her grab or carry things she can’t on her own. However, Silver is useless with other matters. Like if he sees Raven and Jade bickering, Silver will intervene and try to help “sort out the misunderstanding” so they can all be friends.

Sebek

(Loudly) calls Raven “Bird”.

Frenemies…? Sebek talks down to Raven and demeans her like he does many of his peers, but sometime around GloMasq he came to the conclusion that she must be a long lost relative of Malleus's and develops a sense of respect for her. Since then, he has been acting like an eager puppy that trails after Raven and says/does things in hopes of earning her praise.

Raven is confused by his shift in demeanor and wonders why he's suddenly being so nice to her... Not that she's complaining, but it took a while to get used to.

She's still a little intimidated by his looks and loudness.

Book buddies! They give each other recommendations and discuss their latest reads.

Crowley

Calls Raven “my adorable little niece”, sometimes “Raven-kun”.

He's your typical bumbling/silly but well-meaning father figure. Irresponsibly offloads many of his responsibilities onto her. She also often serves as a messenger to Yuu on behalf of Crowley. Usually apologizing for him.

Not above using Raven to make himself appear competent to potential sponsors and donors. Crowley uses a combination of fake tears, bribes, and flattery to get her to act in his favor.

Despite this, she cares for him and he cares for her too. Raven just wishes Crowley would step up sometimes!!

Crewel

She’s scared of him, especially when he raises his voice (even if the scolding isn’t directed at her). Works hard in his class to avoid his ire.

He sees a lot of potential in her, but dislikes that Raven lacks a spine. Crewel often picks on her in class in an effort to get her to be more confident in herself and to learn how to speak up.

Trein

Raven likes Trein! He provides her with a sense of warm and grandfatherly comfort. She's never had a grandpa before, so she considers Trein something akin to that.

Sometimes stays after class to ask questions or just to chat with him. He appreciates this since some of the other first years act out or don't have an interest in the subjects he teaches.

Trein keeps things professional; he feels that a teacher and a student should remain in those roles and not cross those boundaries. However, he lets Raven know that if she needs any guidance, his door is always open. Maybe that's his empty nest syndrome speaking.

Lucius

The one cat Raven isn't immediately apprehensive about, if only because Trein reassures her that Lucius is gentle.

He chills in Trein's lap while they talk.

If he's in a good mood, he might bat a paw at her or let Raven stroke him. She calls him a "very good boy".

Vargas

Slightly intimidated by Vargas's physique and gung-ho attitude. She admires his enthusiasm for self-improvement, but isn't so sure about his methods.

He doesn't let the fact that she's a girl deter him from pushing her hard! If anything, Vargas declares that she has to work two times as hard to prove herself and build some muscle! Raven always leaves his class hugging and puffing, sweaty, and red in the face... but also feeling super proud of herself.

Traumatized by that one time she witnessed Vargas down five dozen raw eggs for breakfast.

Sam

Business owner and customer--there's nothing more to it than that! Sam sees Raven as a particularly valuable customer due to her need for specific ingredients to concoct her enchanted inks. Occasionally puts aside a rare find and lets her know about it for a good deal.

Raven's thankful to Sam for filling in the ingredient gaps for her. Though, uh... she begs of him to stop placing bets with her uncle about whether or not he can buy out his stock.

Yuu

Cordial enough classmates. They're in the same homeroom which is convenient for when Raven has to pass messages or tasks from Crowley to them.

Willing and able to help Yuu out whenever they ask for it.

[Insert other information as desired; varies widely depending on what kind of Yuu features here.]

Ramshackle Ghosts

Raven greets them like they're her friendly neighbors.

The ghosts treat her like that nice Girl Scout from down the lane that stops by every so often to offer them cookies.

Grim

Brings a tuna can as a peace offering. Pushes it to Grim using a stick. Makes him promise to not bite her or set her on fire. Raven walks on eggshells around him.

Grim is mildly insulted by her acting like he's a monster. "I'm a civilized mage too, yanno!!" (He eats her peace offering anyway.)

Neige

Raven mostly knows him from all his appearances as a celebrity. Doesn't think much of him other than "oh, he's cute" or "he's like a fairy tale princess".

Upon welcoming Neige to NRC for the cultural festival, she's surprised to see him being so princess-like in person as well. To Raven, Neige almost doesn't seem real.

Neige gives off a very inviting aura that makes Raven feel welcome and comfortable in his presence, even though they just met.

He'd treat her as he does all of his fans, in a very sweet and pure manner. Might be interested to know that she's a raven; Neige could think it's cool or invite her to join in on their song since ravens count as a songbird. She gets embarrassed and says she can't possibly do such a thing.

Chenya

Another cat boy? Big nope for Raven. Her bird instincts are shouting at her to keep away. Chenya's a lazy sort of cat, so he seems fine to be around (especially since Riddle and Trey vouch for him). They're basically strangers though.

Raven stares at him as he picks up a slice of cake and chomps through it, then asks for seconds. Her only impressions of him are that he's sneaky and kind of a glutton.

Chenya thinks Raven's sorta funny. He teaches her some bad cat puns and asks her a variety of nonsensical questions just to see how she responds.

Loves spooking her by appearing out of nowhere or poking her while he’s still invisible.

Cheka

Calls her "ojitan's friend". Cheka is 100% convinced that Raven is besties with Leona.

She thinks he's a lost child and takes him by the hand to take him to help him reunite with his parents. (Cheka thinks Raven is a lost child too.)

He's a little ball of fur and energy! Cheka runs all over the place and wears Raven down real fast. She's never been so eager to hand the kid off and be rid of him (though she tries her best to smile and wave good-bye).

Rollo

HE HATES EVERYONE, INCLUDING RAVEN.

... But Raven doesn't want to give up on him! She insists on being his pen pal and keeping in touch, since she feels that a large part of why he broke down was not having people to talk to or to support him. Rollo's forced into this situation... but no matter how often he tells her to quit this, she won't let up!

He finds her extremely bothersome, of course. (Rollo won't admit that there's sort of a comfort in including this in his routine, that it's nice to have somewhere to vent and let loose his bottled rage.)

At some point, he extends the offer to listen to her woes about the NRC boys, whom he is certain are sin incarnate.

What? No, they are NOT friends. Absolutely NOT. (His aide and vice president think they are.)

Fellow

Calls Raven the “lil’ lady” of Night Raven College.

Picks on her. Steals her food, takes her books, etc.

Such an ass-kisser (he's hoping to get sympathy and then leech resources off of her). Gets Gidel to play along with his schemes too. Alas... Raven does, in fact, feel something for their situation.

She's highly suspicious of him. Doesn't like it when he acts overly familiar and touches her on the arm or shoulder... or cocks that smug, suspiciously crooked smile.

Raven likes it when Fellow allows his inner child to come out; it's nice to see that he's still able to keep dreaming as an adult, she thinks.

Gidel

To Raven, Gidel's some kid that Fellow strings along in his schemes. She's much more forgiving of him compared to Fellow and does her best to read his body language to understand what he's trying to communicate.

Gidel's curious about her. She's a scholar, right? Wow, he wants to know what that's like! He just kinda stares at her with big, eager eyes.

Skully

He acts like they’re BFFs but Raven tries to keep him at a comfortable distance. Skully (wrongly) assumes that she's his ally and will agree with him on everything.

She thinks that Skully acts and talks like a character from a fairy tale, but in practice she's a little put off by how touchy-feely he is. Raven will let him kiss the back of her hand, but when he's not looking, she'll gently wipe it off on her skirt.

She'll happily sit there and listen to him ramble for hours about Halloween and the traditions of his village. Raven loves a good story!

She acts as the mediator when Skully butts heads with other people about his hyperfixation and idol. It's not very effective, but someone has to do it.

[newkatzkafe2023]

The BALLADS OF SUN WUKONGS🐒👑

Yandere Monkey king harem x Manipulative Queen reader

Chapter 4 the Youthful indiscretions Part 1👼

The day begins with Queen Y/n as she makes her way to the mall, you had gotten off a date with Aizen Cai one of the suitors and boi was watching paint dry more exciting then the date you had with him. The public library really man? But anyway, now it's time to blow off some steam

We stretched out and began our shopping 🛍 Meanwhile a familiar group of monkey men stalked us to the mall and saw we went inside a banana republic first. LMK Wukong, NR Wukong, Netflix Wukong, BMW Wukong, and Mk Reborn Wukong. Mk reborn was dressing up his baby son Fruity up in a tiny school boy outfit.

(BMW Wukong) Ok, I don't quite understand. Why are we using specifically Fruity to spy on y/n???🤔🤨

(MKR Wukong) Well...because Silly girl's to young😒

(NR Wukong) Li is to old😅

(Netflix Wukong) Lin can take care of herself 🙂

(Lmk Wukong) Mk would get us exposed faster then a social media platform 😓

(MKR Wukong) and we don't think HIB Wukong would appreciate us using Luier to get with a girl, so Fruity is literally our only option🙄

(BMW Wukong) ummm ok but that doesn't tell me what the plan is???🤨

(Lmk Wukong) The plan is for Fruity to pretend to be a lost child and when his crys get y/n's attention, she'll go over and tend to him and that way while she's helping him we'll get more info on her😄

(BMW Wukong) Ok, good idea and all, but why is he in a school boy outfit😑

(MKR Wukong) To up the cute factor duh🙄, Ok son here she comes just work your chi magic and remember what we practiced😊

(Fruity) Yay i won't let you down baba😙

Fruity then waddled out to the middle of the mall, then sat on the ground pretending to cry

(Fruity) Wahhh!!!!!!😭😭😭😭

Immediately, you felt your ears twitch and quickly looked over to see a tiny, adorable little fruit boy sitting and crying on the ground, and immediately you ran over to him

(Y/n) Awww what's the matter little gummy bean, are you ok???🥺

(Fruity) Wahhhh, I'm lost, wahhhh I can't find my baba 😭😭😭

You frowned at this predicament and put your paw out for Fruity to climb on, but as soon as you did, you noticed something Furry and sharp in the corner of your eye. You spot a familiar tail belonging to a certain extremely violent monkey

With a smirked as you came up with an idea of your own, you then looked down at Fruity and calmed him down, and began to speak with him

(Queen y/n) Don't worry little man, I'll take you to front desk security, maybe we'll run until your baba on the way😈😇

(Fruity)(sniffling) O-okk i-im fruity😢

(Queen y/n) Hewwo Fruity My name is y/n😇(whispering) but you can call me mama😈

Fruity nodded and calmed down Meanwhile with the monkey kings

(MKR Wukong)(whispering) Yes! She took the cute fruity bait, but she's on the move now 😏

(Lmk Wukong)(whispering) alright gang Let's get a move on then😁

Then you took off with fruity through out the mall, with the monkey kings following close behind to collect info on how to win you over, the first store we went to is Swarovski as the watched you buy something but they couldn't make out what it was

(NR Wukong) Ah Swarovski their known for selling real diamonds jewelry 💎

(BMW Wukong) Agreeded

(MKR Wukong) But what did she buy though🤨

(Lmk Wukong) Can't say, I'm using my eyes of truth but I still can't see it😠

(Netflix) We'll figure it out later. Right now, she's leaving😣

Then the monkeys followed you to Bloomingdale's to make some returns

(Netflix Wukong) Ah so she likes to Bloomingdale's?

(BMW Wukong) Yes of course

Then we went to other stores like Ulta, Hot topic, banana republic, Sephora and more. As the monkey kings continued to follow you thoughtout the mall and finally you arrived to the front desk security.

(Queen Y/n)(cooing) Ok little fruit here's the security, I hope your baba will come and find you😚

(Fruity) Ok thank you mama Bye☺️

You had waved goodbye to the little Fruity fairy and left for home, secretly smirking as you left. Afterwords, the monkey kings waited a bit as they watched you leave the mall before MKR Wukong ran over to hug Fruity.

(MKR Wukong) FRUITY! YOU DID SUCH A GOOD JOB BUD😄

(Fruity) Yay I did good?!😆

(MKR Wukong) You did! You did!😁

(NR Wukong) And thanks to this little guy, we have more material and info to use to get Y/n to fall in love with us🥰

(BMW Wukong) YES LET'S GO BACK TO FLOWER FRUIT MOUNTAIN TO CELEBRATE 🥳

(Lmk Wukong) we should tell HIB and the destined one, about our findings too😃

As the monkey kings left the mall excitingly as the monkey men changed and discussed the notes and observations they made, as they brainstormed ideas and plans.

(Netflix Wukong) But Wait did anybody ever found out what Y/n bought from the Swarovski store??😥

You stood on the roof of the mall looking, looking down at the cute monkey men ad the practically ran out of there

(Queen Y/n)(giggling) Aww their so cute when they think their slick😈

You smirked looking at your new crystal peach🍑😈

FEEL FREE TO REBLOG😈

[stealerofthe2ndbraincell]

ARCANE ACT 3

LIVEBLOG TIME! 🎉🎉

(Once again, more like a reaction then a live blog but sssh)

S2 Ep8: Killing Is A Cycle

Mel in the Ebenezer Scrooge chains again (I know it was Jacob Marley that was in the chains throughout but still) :(

THIS TRANSFORMATION IS SO COOL.

Would be a bit cooler if she wasn't screaming bloody murder throughout but I get it.

They really took some of the excellent bits of her design and decided to really lean into them more for this.

I kind of wish the internet hadn't fucked over the word "empath" cause that made me giggle.

We can't see the sorceress from here but is she meant to resemble the girl from Mel's backstory?

I need to stop pausing to say this immediately before it happens.

Okay so it isn't her, duly noted. I would suck in a fight against this thing.

Did it really say "yeah you're cool but you can still be stabbed, so how powerful are you actually 🙄🙄".

Calamity and Red seem to be associated strongly cause I immediately thought of Breath of the Wild.

I'm living for this backstory.

She must be so cold.

It's all coming back :((

OH SHIT VIKTOR'S IN THE ORB NOW.

God. That's terrifying. Viktor is suddenly extremely terrifying to me.

I'm surprised Ambessa isn't remotely surprised at him mentioning Jayce. He was probably missing for months at this point.

"I will evolve all those willing" so everyone? Everyone in your cult, Viktor? Because they're a literal hivemind so I doubt he'd have much problem.

VI I MISSED YOU.

YOU DID NOT HAVE TO HAVE THAT ISHA FLASHBACK OMG:((

Why does it look like a pokeball? That's so distracting lol

God Maddie is failing across the board, it's embarrassing, girl...

This argument between Cait and Vi was so deserved to be honest.

Maddie is probably hearing all of this...

I never considered Jinx would surrender.

Is Jinx not eating?

Damn what if you just punched me in the gut wow...

Her nails bleeding HURT me so much

"no amount of good deeds can undo OUR crimes" I'm so interested in the "our" from Caitlyn....

Jayce, love ya, but I am not on your side in this argument.

Although, Mel I think calling him and Viktor a "wise investment" in this moment is probably not the move either but still

I was slightly concerned that Jayce's flashbacks (? Would that be the right term for these) would stop once Viktor was "killed". Apparently not.

I'm happy for this turnabout.

I thought in Act 2 he reminded me of S1 Jinx and I'm pushing with that idea now.

Oh nevermind. He almost shot Viktor again.

I know it is very likely one of his followers and not actually Viktor, but damn that robot waist line lmao

Poor Mel probably has very little clue what's going on right now.

I'm distracted by Jayce's design tbh. The black and red colour scheme is sooo nice on his new look.

....

...Well that caught me off guard...

He STILL wants Jayce to be his partner WHAT :'(

"My partner died in this room." OUCH

MEL, MY GIRL!!! 👏👏👏👏

I want to be more enthusiastic for her, but she looks borderline in pain whenever she uses her magic so far :((

WHY ARE YOU PURPLE, JAYCE??

WAIT SO WAS VIKTOR WAITING TO SEE IF JAYCE WOULD JOIN HIM BEFORE STARTING THE EVOLUTION?

After last episode I legitimately, for a second, thought Silco was still alive.

He's not a nice person at all obviously, but in Jinx's hallucination he seems to sound harsher to her?

I did not need to see her spit that out up close.

Wait. It actively fell from her mouth where is it?

O W

I AM SO SCARED, JINX. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE GOING TO "BREAK THE CYCLE"

Is there a reason Mel needs to wear the cloak?

"You will never be a passenger". Listen , I was actually hoping for more from my Jayce and Mel interactions. Both scenes they feel very off-kilter and standoffish of each other. A lot more tense then before (for understandable reasons considering what they both just went through) that I was hoping would start to heal.... but has'nt. However, that line hit.

I am obsessed with the designs of these background characters.

Am I missing something? Who is that playing that random piano??

I feel bad. I don't recognise him.

This entire sequence hurts.

OH. Wait I think I get the inclusion of the piano man. I hope I do otherwise I've just completely forgotten a character lol

[alitlantern]

#𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐍 ━━━━━━━━━ ⚖️ ɪɴᴅᴇᴘᴇɴᴅᴇɴᴛ / ᴍᴜᴛᴜᴀʟꜱ ᴏɴʟʏ / ꜱᴇʟᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ ᴄᴀʀʀᴅ , ʀᴜʟᴇꜱ , ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ , ᴛᴀɢꜱ

ᴛʜᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢꜱ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴊᴜꜱᴛɪᴄᴇ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ꜰɪᴛ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴀ ᴛʜɪᴍʙʟᴇ.

𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐒 ━━━━━━━━━━━━━⚡ an unfriendly aesop: when a moral lesson conflicts with our understanding of "good."

― Melody, 29, they/she

― Account is 18+, NSFW is for 23+

― Disabled, chronically online, horrendous sleep schedule

― Right off the bat, I am sex positive, kink friendly, and a taboo safe haven. I don’t believe in “pro shipping” or anything of that ilk. As long as you’re an adult and not hurting anyone IRL, I beg you to write what you want. With me, even! I’ll write fucked up shit with you gleefully! Censoring will only aid the corrupt.

― Haven’t been on Tumblr in probably 5 years, but I was here in the advent of RP and have a long, sordid history with it

― Iconless bc I’m not trying to screenshot games like that. It’s fine if you use them though!

― Don’t worry about matching my format, of course! I’m very lazy with it as it is

― Have played all the DA games + DLCs, working through the books now

― Constructive criticism about lore is always accepted!

― Brevity is the soul of art or whatever but I suck at it. Sorry :D

― Plotting >>>>

― I can usually bounce off of anything someone sends me, if plotting isn’t your jam, but I am here for the girls, the gays, and the theys that both want a 12 hour long yap session about every intricate detail and also write it all

― Explicit NSFW can be written on the dash if both parties are chill with it. If you wanna write it but don’t want it on the dash, I will be more than happy to move to Discord or Google docs! Also, I’m obviously just as happy to fade to black if need be.

― Favorite genres: Angst, hurt/comfort NSFW/erotica, fluff. I can roll with anything though

― Dark/Mature/Taboo themes will be mentioned; Anders is canonically a victim in many ways and I do not shy away from representing the fact.

― Please move ask responses to separate threads, linking to the original. Also, it doesn’t matter how much time has passed since I answered the ask; always feel free to turn anything into a thread!

― This is controversial but my biggest pet peeve is dropped threads. I’m disabled and have a very limited attention span, but I will still always go out of my way to not drop threads. It may take me weeks to reply, but no thread is ever dropped unless we’ve talked about it. I really hope for the same level of committment to this hobby from those I share it with

― Another controversial take; I don’t always follow with the intent to write. Yes, of course, I would love to write with absolutely everyone and will make that happen as much as I can, but I don’t think it’s a requirement to stay mutuals, or to even be friends! Sometimes I follow people just because I like the way they write, or I want to read their headcanons, or I mean to write with them in the future. I’m not in a rush here to figure out what to do with every last mutual. If that bothers you, please hard block me. No hard feelings!

― Dupes are welcome! We don’t have to write anything but I would love to be friends with people who love Anders as much as I do!

[xylionet]

They can probably all see a bit of themselves in Omega, even if they don't quite understand it. She's like the version of themselves that could have been, if not for Kamino and being raised as child soldiers.

I think part of the reason Hunter focuses on Omega is that she's the one thing he can actually do something about. Can't do anything about Crosshair, can't do anything about the Empire, doesn't feel like he can do anything about Cid and is probably hoping that just following her orders will eventually yield a good result, even though it never does.

But Omega looks at him with those big brown eyes like he hung the stars and only wants stuff he can actually give. She is a source of positive feedback and affection and frankly probably the only thing keeping him sane (see S3, where he kinda went off the deep end the second she's gone).

Realistically, Hunter has always kinda had the Dad/Ori'vod/Big Bro vibes, he was just used to applying them to three chaos gremlins around his own age and with a common military background. Cut's child rearing advice was just a bit of a tweak to his existing process to be a bit more Very Smol Baby focused.

However, Cut's running away advice was much, much scarier. Basically "stop doing the only stuff you know how to do". Cut himself had Suu to support him through that transition. Hunter and the boys don't. They would if they stayed together but I also think at that point in S1 he kind of thought they'd be able to retrieve Crosshair and things might go back to "normal" relatively soon.

If you've read any stories written by kids who were raised super isolated from the outside world and how they struggled to adapt - they're like that. But I don't think they know they're like that.

They've had so many experiences, but not the ones they need now. They're in a position where they don't know they don't know and nobody is telling them. They're very smart, but they just have so little exposure to those different to themselves.

If we compare S1 Hunter to Old Hunter from the end of S3, the difference is palpable. Not just because he's older but because support was provided.

I can absolutely see Shep and Phee getting all the local parents and grandparents and aunties and uncles who can give good advice together, cracking out some BBQ and beers, and lubricating the boys until they talk about their issues. So they can finally get them some damn help.

---

Anyway, I'm really glad you enjoyed it. It feels like the most coherent thing I've managed to write in a while, and as you can see, it still gives me feels. It was kinda spawned from reading too many "why didn't Hunter try harder to rescue Crosshair?" posts.

They are so messed up is why. They're broke and homeless is why. They are this close to living in a cardboard box under a bridge and they don't even know. They can barely rescue themselves, let alone Crosshair.

Clone Force 99 was in trouble

We don’t really talk about just how bad a situation CF99 was in post-Aftermath.

So we have a group of guys who have been raised as soldiers and have functioned in a military their entire lives. They have been fed, clothed and supplied by a military their entire lives. Zero experience with anything else. And then they have to run away from everything they know with nothing but a ship, whatever is on that ship, whatever they are wearing and +1 child.

We then see that they really have no clue how to function outside the military. They have a fairly limited understanding of the value of a dollar. They do not know how to get a job, despite having valuable skills. There’s no indication they are living anywhere but on their fairly small ship.

Most importantly, they are unable to identify that they are being financially manipulated by Cid. Tech occasionally mentions that she’s unreliable and shorting them pay, but none of them seem to understand that she is systematically taking advantage of them. Cid is effectively a loan shark, intentionally locking them in with arbitrary debt and using their financial naivety to keep them working for her.

Echo is the only one to point out that they could just leave, but they don’t. Rex even comes along and offers them a way out. Hunter isn’t wrong to say they want something different, but he’s struggling to achieve that and doesn’t really know what the options are.  It kind of feels like he misses the big picture of what is being offered.

Rex is in a much better position because he is a bit more worldly but also has support from Ahsoka and other contacts outside the military. People who can help him with all of the things that CF99 is struggling with. He also has a goal and a sense of community with other clones that CF99 lacks.

It does feel like CF99 takes comfort in having a chain of command and being in a position where someone is taking care of supplying them, even though it’s actually digging them a deeper hole. It isn’t until mid-Season 2 when Phee comes along and introduces them to a community that they start learning how to cope outside of those structures.

Crosshair is kind of in the opposite situation. He’s still getting supplied by the military but he’s also getting love bombed by the fascists with his fancy new title and all the fun explosives and stuff. He thinks he’s being valued for being special, rather than being used as a convenient tool. He feels like they could just have all this great stuff too, if only they come join the Empire, when in reality he is also in a lot of danger.

It’s rather ironic that Crosshair and Hunter are both able to see each other’s situations for what they are, but not their own.

[ehh-is-the-name]

It's past 11 on a school night and I'm fucking crying over robot sentience.

I could never understand what it would feel like to be created with the intent to kill and maim. Maybe, the intent to work and be worked, but not kill and maim.

I will never understand what it's like to be created with the intention of being a product for the masses, either. I think, I hope, I beg, no one does.

I will never ever be able to fully comprehend why hours of people's work, time, and money would be put into formulating my sentience only for me to be seen as disposable. Even if I could be improved, even if I were "defective", there is no reasonable justification for giving me emotions only to dismiss them by pushing me as a product for a year before starting anew.

It's... It's cruel, to the machines. Sentient or not, it's cruel. Though, I guess we are cruel.

[lingering-sunrise]

.

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

If Edelgard starts a war on cats it would be a CATastrophe. Bad pun aside, it really speaks volumes when people are so enamored and defensive about their fave that they're willing to say "racism, genocide and terrorism is good actually". Fiction may not affect reality most of the time, but it exposes views that some people share that makes you go "yikes.".

I can't believe I didn't even think of that when I wrote it LOL.

For people missing the context, this ask is in response to a reply I wrote on another post.

When it comes to media, it's one thing if there's nuance to the situation and it's not as direct (is she being brainwashed? Controlled? Forced? Somehow unaware? Shown to be conflicted about her actions/what she says? etc). In her case though that's not present and she means what she says. Even still, liking her as a character is fine.

It's different when people start using real life situations or making outright harmful rhetoric, which is something they do both to lift their favorite up and to vilify her enemies (which is why they have to reach so hard, and farther than their arms actually can reach to make up reasons to hate Dimitri. It's not him, it's the fact that they hate anyone who opposes Edelgard, and if Edegard wants them dead they also want them dead. Unfortunately that also turned into demonizing those with mental illness).

Fiction in and of itself doesn't affect reality or indicate what a person is like irl, but their behavior toward others is no longer fiction. Story wise you could argue it makes an interesting character to have these flaws and villainous traits, but it's another story entirely when people double down to insist their characters' actions are just and they go into detail to force it down people's throats - 99.99% of the time unprompted, when that character actively associates with people who have willingly and intentionally committed genocide and aims to do the same herself by finishing the job.

Which you'd think she wouldn't because... those same people wiped out all her siblings, but okay. Somehow the CoS is worse than them. I guess bc Agarthans are human at the end of the day, so no matter how inhumane and atrocious their actions are, they get a pass as long as there's a non-human in the vicinity. Racism typically goes hand in hand with genocide, so. Yeah.

It's not even just that though - it's how the arguments go that indicates if a person is just trying to defend their favorite. If they start brainlessly spewing harmful rhetoric at real people, and if what they say would actively defend real life issues, it's concerning. It's the manner in which they defend their favorite. If the way they argue is exactly how American-hard-rights defend themselves, it starts becoming uncomfortable for people and no longer applies to just fiction.

If what you argue sounds exactly what irl politics sounds like, that's a pretty powerful indicator of who you're dealing with. It doesn't matter if they are or claim to be American-left (specifying because Random said it's different in Europe!). If their arguing points shit on all the values American-lefts stand for, they are not, whether they like it or not, arguing for the left (which all stans claim to do, and then they start regurgitating American-right political stances, extremely often at the expense and discomfort of actual American-lefts. Might I remind you that one of them, a straight man, used abortion and gay marriage both being legally in jeoprady as a gotcha to argue for Edelgard).

It doesn't matter what you claim you're doing. If your arguments actually start reflecting things that can be real, you need to be careful about how you word it. Houses deals with a political atmosphere very heavily, which shouldn't have really been a problem... but it got too close to real life politics within the fandom and people's true colors started to show.

It should have been "I love Edelgard but damn some of what she does is fucked up" and not trying to vehemently defend every singular word she's ever said. As I've mentioned in my very lengthy "why the writing failed Edelgard", the writing is partly to blame for people being divided on her, but it's the fans' own faults if they can't draw a line between liking her character and supporting things in a way that makes it sound like you'd support them irl.

It's even worse that all that nonsense picked up really badly right around the time Ukraine got invaded and Putin was out there spewing nonsense. It became a sensitive issue to have people defending Edelgard invading other countries proudly with false claims/propaganda, because the arguments fell perfectly to a T in line with what Putin was doing.

Evidently that didn't matter to the people who never touch grass and waste their time and energy only thinking of defending Edelgard instead of just enjoying her character, but then, they don't really even enjoy her character; they just enjoy their made up version of her who fights for what they want her to fight for instead of realizing what she's actually doing. These people would be damn easy bait for irl politics and it shows. Dangerously.

So for anyone arguing about your fictional favorites, remember that context is important and how you treat the topic(s) at hand are just as important. I absolutely adore a villain just like Edelgard because of good writing, and there are points I can actually defend him (if you've been on this blog for more than like a week you prooOOOObably know who I'm referring to AT THIS POINT lmao). That doesn't mean I'm going to call invasion, racism, etc good and just for his better talking points to be achieved.

In my opinion Edelgard ended up poorly written because the writers wanted to be bias in the context of the story but couldn't properly justify the atrocities. I'll be honest, if this is how they handle (main) female villains, I'd rather just not have them. I'd rather go back to the days of Petrine and Hilda who were side villains and allowed to be as disgusting and horrendous as they wanted.

If writing a lead villain who is female won't work because they can't stop pushing their bias into the writing (don't even look at poor Petra, she got SKEWERED in CF and especially in SB) and it reflects poorly, I just don't want it. I know men at the writing table for some wild reason throughout the years have been unable to properly write females (which like, why. Just write human beings. But no, they seem to act like females are a different entity entirely), but if that's going to remain the case, I don't want them to write them in situations like these because they clearly can't handle it. They treat Edelgard as a trophy wife who has to be perfect for them and not as a complex, legitimate person.

Mind you, I also made a post before about how Edelgard is separated from other female villains by being drawn as "attractive". Ishtar gets treated much better than other female villains as well, with Heroes going as far as to outright shit on canon and give her an alt where she "joins the Liberation Army", which... the whole point of her character and her fighting in that war was that she was on the opposite side but wasn't a bad person. I could argue similar things for Burian, but that's more headcanon/literally based on just his death quote lmfao.

Point being, Ishtar is drawn to be attractive. Petrine and Hilda are not, and are outright villainous, terrible, not complex people at all (Hilda is a hypocrite, but she's not complex). Edelgard was drawn to be attractive, and was thus not treated like a villain proper. Unfortunately this got warped into the fandom we know now, but... like we both said, the way they argue for her is pretty telling and honestly pretty scary. Let's not forget that they've spewed death threats at people simply for not liking Edelgard.

No, that last sentence was not a joke nor an exaggeration. In a way it makes sense though, considering they defend genocide, racism, etc.

[thebuttsmcgee]

god I can't get over how fucking amazing of a trailer the Arkham Trilogy had for the Nintendo Direct.

THE Arkham City revamped theme song, syncing in with the strikes and explosions in the background, with characters giving their lines in between, showing most of the Rouges Gallery, and that's not even mentioning how they, somehow by a miracle, got ALL 3 games to look actually really fucking good on switch!!!!!

Like Asylum and City, were somewhat a given, they were originally 360/PS3 and even City was on the Wii U, but considering this Miiiight be the Return to Arkham remasters and possibly not the OG 360/PS3 ports (which would be a bit unfortunate, the OG ports actually look better due to the team making their limits their advantage) which is a bit more demanding,

AND THEN, ARKHAM KNIGHT LOOKS GOOD !!!!! LIKE HOLY SHIT??!?? I know the gameplay footage isn't final, but a good amount of gameplay was show and none of it looked really choppy or too bad?? Seriously holy fucking shit this is astronomically batshit nuts

The studio behind this port is Turn Me Up studios, they were behind the switch ports of the Borderlands games, It Take Two, Brothers:A Tale of Two Sons, and the Tony Hawk Pro Skater remakes. And what's SOOOO shocking above all,(as far we know) like seriously surprising, is that Knight isn't Cloud! Not a Cloud service game, it's native to switch. LIKE. HUH. HOW. THIS ISN'T IMPOSSIBLE BUT DAMN NEAR CLOSE YKNOW

god I'm so fucking excited to play this saga again! Plus look at this rad as fuck render for this port, it'll be great hopefully!!!

..

...

....now, ahem, where's the Origins port also? It was on Wii U as well and is actually in fair demand. /lh