#i really can't imagine very well what a balanced meal looks like

[autobahnmp3]

well I'm meal planning so I don't have to decide what to eat and also so I'll have like.... nutritious meals lol

[ayoharuko]

Love and Deepspace: Boyfriend Headcanons ♡

I really need to start writing more Zanye stuff considering his my type in so many ways, don't get me wrong but I love all of them, however. Zayne was the one who pulled me into the game and made me stay :3

Again, most of the headcanons may or may not be already canon in game. But do not worry, I do have originals I've thought off :3

Reader here is Gender Neutral (They/Them)

If you haven't seen Xavier's part its here!

Warning: Some Spoilers from his Myths and minor swearing.

Reminder: The character belongs to INFOLD/ its respective creators; this is all just fictional work so please try to not take these too seriously :)

♡ Now, we all know that our favorite Doctor loves sweets right? I feel like in his feel time, aka when he doesn't have work and takes a break from the hospital - he'll practice how to bake sweet goodies.

♡ Think about it! He knows how to cook well and his knife skills are exceptional, so he would definitely make baking as a stress relief and hobby.

♡ I imagine him making sweets to either give to the patients in the hospital, or maybe his coworkers too, once they finish another hard day.

♡ Obviously, you'll get most of the treats as your his special person but not only do you get most of the goods - you also get the first taste! He would also ask you for your honest opinion, now if your scared in telling him the truth; don't be. He encourages it so he can improve better in baking :)

♡ While on the convo of cooking and food - we also know that this man can cook very well, not only is the meal balanced but the presentation and taste is immaculate.

♡ Don't worry picky eaters, you won't even taste the veggies he put in the meal so you'll be safe and not gag (At least not from the food yk what I'm sayin-)

♡ Zayne will ALWAYS make time for you. No matter how busy he is, you will always be his top priority.

♡ You are literally the whole exact reason why he choose to be a cardiac surgeon/doctor after all.

♡ That also means he worries over you like a mother hen, sometimes he can be overbearing and too much on the scolding or doting whenever you get injured.

♡ So obviously, that leads to a few fights here and there but you understand that his intentions are all good.

♡ You are the passenger princess ✩

♡ Like. His car will always have snacks that you love, extra necessities, ties and your playlist is saved on his car too!

♡ On his day offs and you guys feel like hiking somewhere far, he would stock up his car filled with stuff that you usually use at your home as he wants you to be as comfortable as possible.

♡ He tries not to spoil you... he tried to put a limit on everything so you don't get your way but your just so fucking adorable and stupid sometimes that he can't resist giving in... kidding he loves you-

♡ Dates would consist of; cat cafes, hiking, going to the gym, trying out cafes, kitty cards but mostly he would prefer to spend time with you at your or his place :)

♡ Love languages would be Acts of service and Quality time.

♡ As mentioned, he would do chores and he'd cook for you. He also prioritizes you over anything, all his time belongs to you... it has always belonged to you.

♡ Despite telling you to always limit your sweets/desert intake, it apparently doesn't apply to him.

♡ You both would frequently visit the dentist as his teeth would hurt from the amount of sweets (and sugar.) he'd consume, one wonders how he hasn't gotten diabetes yet....

♡ Zayne knows that he can come off as aloof or cold so he thinks about the words he says to you before he actually speaks it. Which often saves you both from arguments a lot.

♡ He also makes a point to be honest whilst not hurting your feelings, you won't have to worry about him lying about how you look or the answers he'll give to your questions.

♡ The only thing he'd be dishonest about tho is when his the one in need of help. His so used to not accepting help that he lies that his evol doesn't hurt him; when clearly, it does.

♡ You'd have to be super plushy to make him care enough to take a break for his own well-being, how ironic for being a Doctor right? Well, his thankful that in times when he can't be the doctor, you make sure to step in as a Doctor just for him and him only.

♡ Zayne often has trips to the Arctic; and when he does, he would either take you with him (Which is rarely.) or make sure to update you with pictures of/or with Pie, the scenery and with your requests - his face as well. You both won't be able to video call all the time while his at the arctic because the signal would be weak so he takes pictures instead.

♡ When he does get back from his trip, expect gifts and tea from him. He'll also make sure to kiss you deeply as he definitely missed you a lot.

♡ Cats aren't really fond of him right? You would force take him to cat cafes all the time and try to establish a connection between him and one of the cats! There was only one cat that liked him enough tho- But thats a win for you!

♡ Since its been said that you both do go hiking sometimes, I believe you guys would do some camping as well.

♡ He would take you on a hiking journey up a cliff filled with pretty flowers and Mayne jasmines that he may or may not have planted himself and you both would set up camp there.

♡ He would grill some food, take out the sweets he baked back at his place and cuddle you under the starlight... wishing for this all to last forever.

♡ He gets nightmares right? When he does; all he wants to do is seek you out, but he often feels guilty as he knows you have your own problems... So you have to rely on your 'Zayne Senses' to know whether the nightmares haunt him or not.

♡ When it is haunting him; all you need to do is Lead him to the bed, tuck his head into your chest - just enough so that he can hear your heartbeat while you whisper promises that you're never gonna leave him.

♡ Zayne has learned how to be patient, yet for you? His Patience will be tested. Whether it's you on those week - long missions or you not calling or messaging.

♡ Zayne does skincare..... I firmly believe he has friends that are dermatologists and that they give him skincare products sometimes as a gift. He gives some of them to you too, if it has good benefits or if you just want it.

♡ If you both are living together and your schedules are in-sync; you both would do your skincare routines together.

♡ I believe that Zayne - not only takes care of his body health but also his face - and not in a beauty standard way but in a 'Good looks makes the patient more at ease and would likely trust him more typa way'

♡ However, in months where the hospital gets busy; he develops a little stubble under his chin. Sometimes its on purpose as he likes the way you shave it or the way you sit on his lap if yk yk...

♡ Nicknames that he gives you are so sweet like honey... the way he calls out to you with that sweet nickname he has given you, it instantly fills you with butterflies.

♡ I like to think he'd call you Honey, Sweetheart and My Love a lot... but when your asleep in the comforts of your shared bedroom; he'd whisper My heart and My Jasmine, just soft enough that you could barely hear whilst slipping away to dreamland.

♡ In conclusion, Zayne is just filled of Husband Material ᯓᡣ𐭩

♡ His not perfect by all means (Expect you think he is) but he will do everything in his power to make sure that you'll not only be satisfied but also comfortable.

I had a lot of fun writing Zayne's part! Considering that his my main after all heh.

I hope that you all enjoyed reading Zayne's part and let me know if ya'll want a NSFW Version of these headcanons :)

See you guys on my next post~!

Rafayel's Boyfriend Headcanons, check it out too!

Reblogs are appreciated and Feedback/Comments are always appreciated! :3

(Note: please don't copy and paste my works anywhere, and if you do see them on other platform please inform me.)

[acti-veg]

Hello, I'd like your opinion & possibly advice on something: I used to be hard on myself, in many aspects of my life. With time, self love, positivity and therapy I learned to be gentle to myself instead, and I've come a long way. I don't stress over deadlines anymore, I respect my own needs, I forgive myself for slip ups etc. However, this also resulted in what looks like too much leniency: I feel I lack discipline now and I can't really stick to something in a constant way. This leniency made its way in my veganism too. For instance, a few days ago I was on a date and I didn't like any of the vegan options on the menu, so I decided to order a vegetarian dish instead. I told myself I wanted to enjoy that evening and pretty much prioritised my own needs over my morals. I made peace with that a bit too easily. What do you think and what would you suggest?

I think it is a very good thing that you have learned to be more gentle with yourself, and that is something you don’t want to lose. The danger is that you end up either giving up compromising on the things that are important to you, or rubber banding, where you are so lenient that guilt creeps in and you end up shooting off in the other direction entirely, and end up being too harsh with yourself once again.

I think that there is a balance to be struck between these two extremes. It can be helpful to set some rules for yourself, lines that you are just not willing to cross. This is healthy not just for your own behaviours, but for other people to know where your boundaries are and respect them. You don’t want that date thinking you’re happy to bend on your veganism for the sake of convenience for example, as they’ll have no reason to make an effort to find somewhere that can accommodate you better.

People great you how you allow them to, but that also counts for yourself, as well. You obviously value the lives of animals because you went vegan, and I imagine you want to live in a way that is in alignment with your own values and does both harm animals. The mere fact that you feel about not doing so speaks to that, and the convenience of being about to order something on the menu really isn’t worth the harm that causes and the spiral it draws you into.

“I’m not willing to compromise on my veganism” is a pretty straightforward rule and a very healthy boundary for others to know about, though there is some room for nuance. Are you willing to pick up or buy non-vegan meals for someone else, gifts, cooking for kids or elderly parents, that sort of thing.

Where you set those lines is really up to you, and where the lines are is less important than the fact that that there are lines. If there aren’t, you’ll end up compromising your values far more often than you’d like.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

Hi ! I don't know if this is a vent, a question or anything else, but I needed it out and I needed to be understood. (I prefer to warn you that I will be talking about weight, not in precise numbers but still, and just negativity):

So, I'm in recovery, after a relapse. For my first time recovering, I ate with no restriction, everything and anything I wanted. I had lost maybe 10kg, and was very close to, well, dying, so I think eveything went really fast, as it needed to, you know. After two months, I had no fear foods or anything anymore, I did not care much about my body. But one day, left alone at home, I don't know why, I weighted myself, to see I was at my normal weight again. And I don't know, I didn't expect it, and I really panicked. I couldn't tell, nobody could, because I am naturally very lean and honestly the weight gain was not very visible (except for the fact that I was more lively and a little less bony).

So I relapsed, for one whole year again I think. I'm very sad about all the time I wasted. But now, each time I want to recover, I'm so afraid. I'm reminded of all the nights after relapsing blaming myself for getting ''like this'', being ''disgusting'', taking picture and pinching my skin and crying and crying so much. I'm afraid this will just be the same cycle over and over again.

The problem is I want to recover, I want my life, but 1, I'm scared of it, as I fear I will relapse and be in pain again, and 2, an eating disorder is very comforting and I find peace in that (I know it is messed up).

For some months, I've been able to eat more and be more relaxed about this by aiming at a lean and a bit muscular body type, in a healthy way. I read nutrition books and I try more and more to include carbs (wich I forbid myself or felt guilty about), protein, ect, and I tell myself I'm doing this for something healthy. I exercice a bit less than I did before and now install rest days, things like this.

But I still can't look at my body. Every time I put on something and it feels different (maybe just an impression, maybe because I've been working out to get toned legs, I don't know), I panic. Just now, I tried on a pant and it suits me but I'm paranoid it's more tight than before.

I tell myself I'm getting muscle, it's normal. I tell myself that my body knows what is is doing and that maybe it is normal that my body won't be exactly the same than is was when I ate nothing, or than my 17 years old body (I'm 19 now). But I still can't wear many things, I still can't walk normally in fear of my legs touching or sleep without a pillow between them. I'm so exhausted of this.

What can I do to let go? I have no idea. I want to be okay again and to simply go on with my life without my thought going aroud only my body and food. Yes, I want to eat healthy (of course with balance), I want to do sports (because I like it and because I know what I want to look and feel like), but I don't know how to let go of this disordered way of thinking about it.

I am moving out of my home in two days, and going to live alone in a flat for my studies. I am scared that, without anyong reassuring me, without imposed meals and help, I will break out and eat nothing, having to start on square one again.

If you can help me, in anyway, if you have an idea of what I could do, please, do tell me, as I am desesperate and scared of how I will manage all of this. (and thank you for reading this massive thing)

<3

Hi anon! I know it took me a few days to get to this, but I hope getting this all out helped you somewhat.

First of all, you don't lose your progress or waste anything when you relapse. I know it feels like it, because you spend so much time trying to get yourself out of a bad place, and put in so much work, and then you have to work hard to get out of the hole all over again. There's a lot of shame, frustration, and hopelessness wrapped up in that, I imagine. But you didn't forget what you learned while you were healing, did you? You can take up the journey again and resume learning. You are worth it, even if you have made mistakes and slipped up as so many of us have before. Beating yourself up and calling yourself disgusting won't help - you cannot hate yourself into a person you will love. Why not instead look at your body when it's suffering and treat it like you would a small child in distress? "You are really struggling! I had better take good care of you now." Same with your emotions when you are hating on yourself and your body. "You are having a very hard time! I'd better take good care of you."

I don't know what to tell you about the body image stuff because I honestly still struggle with it. I'd just continue telling yourself that it's healthy and good to grow and change. That you will not deprive your body of its natural journey out of hatred. Perhaps you can also prepare yourself some nutritious snacks and meals ahead of time, like bulk cooking, and set yourself phone reminders to eat that fit in with your day? Only you can hold yourself accountable to do this.

But it sounds like in order to address the impulse to restrict, you need to address the self-hatred and self-frustration you seem to want to cope with via restriction. If you can't do body positivity, maybe try body neutrality, but there's also the general frustration you frequently have toward yourself. How can you talk kindly to yourself, and guide yourself like you would a small and vulnerable child? You wouldn't speak to the child cruelly, even when the child made a mistake, right? You wouldn't fail to notice all the unique personality traits that make the child who they are. Their interests, hobbies, and unique self-care needs - you would make these things available to the child, wouldn't you? Perhaps you can incorporate these self-care activities into eating and make time to truly enjoy your food and your self-care activity, just unwinding if you're able to get some downtime during that meal and making it into something you look forward to every day, because you are spending quality time with yourself.

Perhaps you can find online or in-person support groups in your area. Do you have a therapist you can check in with about supporting your eating schedule? Who else can be in your support system? What can the people in your life, far and near, do to be supportive of your mental health?

No matter what, don't be too discouraged by struggles. That one meal you stress during because instead of getting to sit with yourself, you have to get work done while you eat today. The surprise invitation to go out and eat with friends when you haven't practiced that. The urge to relapse (so many of us feel it!)

Oh, and take yourself shopping if you need to. Go thrifting if money's tight, but allow yourself to buy new clothes that make you feel good if the old ones are triggering you. Remember, weight naturally fluctuates and if you lose or gain some you can get more clothes. It's so hard for me to let go of old clothes that no longer fit me, but giving yourself permission to get clothes that feel good for you is SO liberating even if it's really, really hard.

I hope this helps!

[acornered]

2024 WISHLIST

I know Resolutions are a controversial concept but I still want to spend some time reflecting on what my goals this year were, if I accomplished them to my satisfaction, and what I'd like the next year of my life to look like. So here we go:

Purchase second-hand and locally owned as much as possible How Well I Did: Very well! I've become friends with a lot of local vintage store owners, artists, and tradespeople, and I've been able to reduce the amount of frivolous consumption I engage in significantly. Repeat in 2024: Absolutely!!!

Continue to work on my relationship with my body How Well I Did: Uh. Ooof. Um. My body changed a lot this year and it's been really hard for me to make peace with that. Regular healthy meals and consistent exercise are both difficult habits for me because of the mental illnesses, and falling off of that particular wagon, combined with finally coming to terms with my ED, has made for a rocky road to body positivity. Repeat in 2024: I need to redouble my efforts here, and actually commit to forming healthy habits around food, and making time to do a little physical activity each day. And every time I look in the mirror, I will try to challenge the negative thoughts until I can hopefully accept the inherent worth and beauty of my flesh.

Continue to work on my mental health How Well I Did: Average, I think. There were bouts of depression, and periods of inconsistency with my medication, but I am getting better every day and I have built myself a really stellar support system to pick up the slack when I need it! Repeat in 2024: Always, every year, forever. I can't imagine going back.

Nurture and honor my relationships with others, and my own wellbeing in those relationships How Well I Did: Pretty well, with only 2 notable exceptions. To the people who have helped me grow, who have loved me enough to tell me when I am wrong, who have been patient with me when I've had to assert a boundary with them-- thank you. I may not always choose well, but when I do I end up with the most beautiful, loving relationships I could ask for. Repeat in 2024: There are two specific things that I need to face down next year (one pleasant but terrifying, and one awful but necessary), and I only hope that I can do so with strength and grace and that the pain will be worth the healing it brings.

Have positive romantic and sexual experiences How Well I Did: I had moderate success with this one. While I made a real effort to put myself out there, there were moments of true despair, especially after a couple of opportunities broke down from poor communication/bad timing. However, I did manage to figure out some important boundaries, and enforce them to varying degrees of success. I'm entering 2024 still single, which is not ideal, but with a much better sense of what I'm looking for and how to ask for it. Repeat in 2024: I'm still not great at making the first move, but I am mentally projecting shoot your shot vibes to every cute girl I know, and maybe this year I'll even get an opportunity to be courageous.

Read at least 1 book every month How Well I Did: I managed around 8/12, and didn't keep track of when I read what. But I am consuming books again which is in turn helping me rediscover my love of reading and writing. I think with more of a concentrated push, I can make this happen for real! Repeat in 2024: Yep, with better documentation this time!

Conclusion: 2023 was a mixed bag, and it really ended on a low note with multiple waves of interpersonal conflict, a bad bout of depression, and an unexpected death of someone I've known since childhood. I want to start the New Year with a clean slate, but it's difficult with so many things unresolved, and a funeral service to attend in the very first week of 2024. I am determined to start slow, and find that balance between necessary rest and gratuitous wallowing. I am grateful every day that my desire to move forward, to shape the life I want for myself, overpowers my desire to lay down and never move again. At least most of the time. I promise to continue to find beauty in quiet, unlikely places, to give the kind of love I wish to receive, and make my corner of the world the kind of soft place I'd be happy to inhabit. If you've read this far, I love you and I hope you stick around. Happy New Year (almost).

[m34gs]

So I asked @kimium how she would rank the NRC Housewardens on a scale from "least like a parent" to "absolutely 100% parent/dad" (see her response here) and she prompted me to share my own rankings. Well, here they are!!

Riddle - Riddle tries his best, he really does, but I think he's too caught up in The Rules to truly be a parental figure. He would be just too strict and not really understand how to balance rules with having fun and being supportive. If anything, he would be "Scary Parent Who Needs a Chill Pill" because of how strict he is.

Leona - I agree that Leona is more likely "Lazy/Relaxed Uncle", and that he would find most kids annoying/tiresome. But he will step in if he has to...especially if those kids scream outside his nap area for an extended period of time.

Azul - Azul starts showing kids how to get away with tax evasion. Azul is no longer allowed near the "children" (Ace, Deuce, Epel, Grim, and Jack). Riddle found Azul with a self-published "children's" book titled Working Within Capitalism: How to Swindle Your Neighbour Without Going to Jail, and he made a rule on the spot dictating Azul "must be supervised when around easily influenced people".

Kalim - Again, I agree that Kalim is "Least Like a Parent". He just has too much fun goofing off with people that he would never be able to be the one to reign them in if things went too far. While he is caring and would try very hard to make sure no one is left out or hurt, he would also definitely think a bag of candy is a fine substitute for a meal because it still gives energy.

Vil - Vil is 100% a Parent. I agree. I think he has a good sense of responsibility and is really skilled in reading the room. He would be able to tell if someone was upset even if they don't say it, and he knows that different methods work for different people. I feel like he would be very understanding and comforting to people, especially when he knows they are working hard.

Idia - Idia is "Needs Supervision at All Times". Literally. If left to his own devices he will game nonstop for days. DAYS. DAAAAYYYYYYSSSSSSSSSSSS. When Ortho is away, the other Housewardens need to babysit him, honestly. My precious boy is so bad at self-care...can't even take care of himself, he's not ready to parent anyone.

Ortho only manages to get him to take care of himself because Idia wants to be a good big brother. Honestly, if it weren't for Ortho, Idia would be in some serious trouble.

Malleus - I love the idea of Malleus as older sibling...but I love even more the idea of Malleus "what the fuck do I do with a child" Draconia. He's a bit out of touch with human society, and honestly probably even the fae since he's so solitary. I imagine Malleus looking at a child and going "they told me to entertain but I am trying and it's not working" and meanwhile he has the child boosted up in a high chair at the table and between them is a chess board and he's been trying to play them in chess for over three hours but the child keeps trying to EAT THE PIECES WAIT STOP THAT THIS IS LILIA'S CHESSBOARD HE WILL NOT BE HAPPY WITH ME OH CRAP.

And there's my thoughts! Hope you enjoyed :D

[oraclekleo]

Kleo you're the only blog i found who celebrates getting older & becoming mature. You always mentioned your age without any shame. No cutting back a few years to seem "younger". Society really demonized getting older when in reality, it's so much better than being a teenager.

I'm not naive anymore. I can control my emotion. I'm calmer. I earn money. I don't involve myself in useless fight like fandom fights 💀

These are are not even half the benefit of getting older. As for health, your 30s is not 70s lol. We're fine.

-LS

Hello!

😂

Honestly, I still feel like a child even in my 30s. I know I haven't figured everything out, I still struggle to properly adult but yes, just like you say, 30s are great!

I mean, in your 30s you don't really go to school or university so you basically only learn what you are genuinely interested in or when it's for your career and you get paid for improving your qualification instead of getting meaningless marks. In your 30s, you know you don't need to impress anyone because same as you, they don't care whether your handbag is Prada or reusable cotton shoulder bag you bought in Tesco 5 years ago to carry your groceries home. Unless you actually have some conditions, your hormones and periods are pretty much settled down and you can predict your mood swings based on your cycle and give warnings to those of concern. In your 30s, you usually know what you want and don't want in life - I know I don't want husband and children and I knew it in my 20s but only after reaching magical 30 people started to take me seriously. And that's another thing - people actually listen to you and respect your values and opinions in your 30s. Finally you have the authority to actually completely decide about your life. Yes, people might critisise your decisions but the great thing is that you don't have to care about their opinion because you're pretty much well established on your own and if they keep bitching about something you can easily tell bye bye to them.

Yes, I have back pains, I need regular sleep schedule, I can't spend a day eating fastfood or my internal organs will let me know very clearly I made a mistake while in my teens I could live on chips and fizzy drinks for a week and still feel at the top of my game. But honestly, these are actually good things. Back pains motivate me to stretch and exercise. Regular sleeping shedule is healthy and really, really great. If you never had a regular sleeping schedule, you have no idea what utter bliss you are missing. And the fact I need to eat nutritious and balanced meals in order to feel good is also pretty ace.

I love being on my 30s. And quite frankly I'm looking forward to my 40s. If I'm smart now, I might be able to actually achieve some of big dreams that seem unreachable now but might be much accessible when in my 40s. I actually like growing old.

And to all those who think they know how world spins in their teen years - YOU HAVE NO IDEA! Don't you dare shaming people older than you. We have been through shit you can't even imagine. I didn't have internet when I was your age. We had to go to libraries and read or at least browse through actuall thick books for hours to find a little piece of information you can Google in 2 seconds. I miss spending hours in library now... I should spoil myself with a library day sometimes... 😏 Because I have a nice job and so many days of paid vacation that I can just randomly decide to spend a day in a library! And that's what you get in your 30s... Plus a nice salary to spoil yourself even more. 😂

So yeah! Thank you for celebrating 30s with me, dear! 💜💜💜💜

'We rock!' we whisper to our mirror reflection before moisturizing and going sleep at 9 pm. 🤣

Kleo 🦄

[loorain]

Sims 4 Fontenot Legacy - A Lull in Late Winter

Winterfest snuck up on the save this year, and with the kitchen being out-of-commission while remodeling happens due to the fire, the day came and went very uneventfully. But Scarlett has been enjoying repainting and finding excuses to fix up other areas of the house 😆

That isn't to say the family didn't enjoy any of the Winterfest activities! They still opened presents and joined in the holiday spirit with each other.

And Audrey decided to spend her first Winterfest hitting a lighthearted milestone!

Sabrina's burnout isn't getting any better. Taking care of Juno is taking all their time and energy and any moment they're not caring for their son, they're catching up on sleep, stuffing their mouth with a quick meal, or taking a quick shower. It's caused them to lose their athletic trait and acquire a more lazy lifestyle outside of being a parent.

This also means that their time away from their relationship with Beau has them feeling concerned. Maybe they truly did jump too quickly into things with him... like Bernard. Like Gideon. In fact, maybe with everyone they've ever been with in some capacity... Have they always been this impulsive?

So it's a surprise when Marquise stops by the house. Sabrina has just put Juno down for a nap and hasn't even had the chance to change out of their pajamas, but they're too tired to care.

Marquise: Sabrina... you look exhausted.

Sabrina: Yeah, well, that's what you look like when you're caring for an infant by yourself.

Marquise takes the dig.

Marquise: I know. Things have been pretty crazy with my job, and moving into a new spot. I'm sorry, I should have checked in more.

Sabrina can't keep up their anger though. They break, but Marquise is there to console them.

Sabrina: It's been really hard... I'm so tired...

Marquise: I can only imagine, everyone's hands are full here with Juno and the twins.

Sabrina: But at least Robin has a partner to help them delegate tasks...

Marquise: You're right. I will come over more often, and Juno can take some trips to my house for some time now that I'm settled. Does that sound good?

Sabrina: ...Yeah. Thanks.

Marquise: No need to thank me, he's my son too. So, wanna tell me what's been going on?

So Sabrina updates Marquise on everything: Juno's milestones, quitting their job and deciding to start their own restaurant and their break with Beau.

Marquise: Wow. Okay, that's a lot. You really broke up with Beau?

Sabrina lets out an exasperated sigh.

Sabrina: Not break up, just taking a break.

Marquise: Okay, "break", well how are things going in that realm then?

Sabrina: I don't know... It's complicated. Just focusing on myself and Juno right now. I told him I wanted to take some time to really get myself together before I could really commit time to us. I just... I feel like I'm always screwing things up. Everything I touch, I destroy. And I don't want to do that to him. Or Juno. So I need to do this. It's rough, but I need to do this.

Marquise: Well I understand, but you definitely need a better balance. If you feel the break is needed, go for it, but don't focus so much on being perfect and only working. No wonder you feel awful. You need to get out for yourself too.

Sabrina: I don't even know what I enjoy anymore. Life's just... it's a lot.

Marquise: Okay, let's schedule a stay-over for Juno to come to my place for a couple of days. Maybe after he ages into a toddler if you're more comfortable with that. Then you can use that time to do whatever your heart desires. Even if it's just sleeping in, do whatever you want.

Sabrina: Okay, it's a deal.

[aerael-a]

What does your muse smell like?

Koichi is very particular about hygiene and cleanliness, so he always smells clean. Most would describe his scent as like sunshine, lemongrass and peaches.

What does your muse's hands feel like?

Koichi's hands are soft, but not as soft as one would imagine them to be. He likes manual labor, things like gardening, plowing small patches of land so he can sow little vegetable gardens, or flower gardens. Aside from that, he is also a tailor and seamster, so he's had a few needle accidents over the course of his life. They are still unbelievably soft when someone takes into account what Koichi enjoys doing on his free time, but the scars and tales of those activities are there, on the palm of his hands.

What does your muse usually eat in a day?

Koichi doesn't really pay much attention to what he eats. He has a very healthy relationship with food as in he eats what he wants when he wants to, however he does try to keep things balanced. His father is a world renowned chef, so he knows how to put together tasty and healthy meals. But mostly, as he is always on the go, he has salads, ready-made meals his PA buys him.

Does your muse have a good singing voice?

Yes, but he doesn't sing. So essentially, his voice is untrained, but he has a nice tone, and enjoys humming as he works.

Does your muse have any bad habits or nervous ticks?

Not really. Koichi is not a nervous person, and is one of the few members of his family who doesn't experience anxiety very often. So I would say if and when he does get nervous, the little ticks that plague most people plague him as well. As for a "bad habit", well, Koichi struggles with severe anger issues, and when pushed far enough he will snap. Violently.

What does your muse usually look like/wear?

Given that he is a public person, Koichi can't ever be seen scruffy or sloppy, so he is always wearing beautifully tailored outfits of his own creation. He is also a very flamboyant person, so he wouldn't enjoy being dressed casually unless it is at home.

Is your muse affectionate? How so?

Yes. Very much yes. Koichi is basically sunshine, rainbows and fairy dust. He is so incredibly affectionate, and he warms up to people so fast. And he loves very easily, but he loves completely and fully. There is no middle ground for Koichi. He adores to not only cuddle, hold hands, kiss foreheads, but he also adores to shower the person with gifts.

What position does your muse sleep in?

Koichi's sleep schedule is a bit all over the place due to his job, but he usually sleeps on his side, hugging a pillow. Or you can catch him sleeping on his stomach, both arms under his pillow.

Could you hear your muse in the hallway from another room?

Absolutely. While Koichi speaks rather softly, he gets excited very fast and can be heard talking about fabrics and patterns through the whole house if he gets excited enough.

tagged by: @multianime ty <3 tagging: @kisumshi, @ghoulsmuses, @mcwscollective & whoever else feels like doing it !

[tallulah477]

/It was new and terrifying, having the eyes of the future Olo’eyktan so filled with adoration and lust and hope whenever they laid on you./

This is literally so true! It's not something I think about often, and I wish they would have gone into more detail about it in the movies with Jake becoming Olo'eyktan and all the pressure and responsibilities that come with that, but the Sully's are essentially royalty. They're an important family with an important name, and Neteyam is the future clan leader so I think that if it were me, I'd be super intimidated lollll

/Where he had to be strong and immovable, you could be adaptable and kind, giving each other a perfect balance in life./

Oh my goodness! So cute! They balance each other out so well 🧡

/His hand would often find your thigh throughout shared meals, inevitably ending with the two of you sneaking past the trees and with his head between your legs./

Ohhhh how scandalous 😏

/There was a flush high on his cheeks, pupils dilated to show only a thin ring of gold as he gazed upon you. A small moan rumbles across the sensitive flesh of your folds as he notices you blink awake./

WHAT I WOULD GIVE TO WAKE UP TO THIS SIGHT 😩

My turn when???

/“I’m sorry, yawnetu, I could not wait. You looked so sweet-'' His voice was weak and breathy, and you vaguely noticed one hand snuck beneath his tewng to palm at his cock./

The image of him stroking himself while he eats her out cause he's so desperate for her and can't even wait for her to wake up is sooooooo hot 🥵

/“Haah-such a nice present waiting for me at home, yawnetu, all spread out and waiting. Did you miss me?”/

Our man is such a dirty talker lol. I love the way he tries to pin his insatiable horniness on her, like she was just way too tempting and he couldn't help himself

/You can vaguely hear the sound of him working his own cock, imagining the way the tip peeks between his thick fingers to leak onto himself as he devours you./

/“Just wait, yawnetu, soon. I-I need to taste you.” He mumbles the promise into your folds, gasping and panting into you with each tug at his cock. His face is near rutting into you, nose bumping at the top of your pussy and inhaling deep breaths of your sweat and slick. “Thought of it the w-whole time, just like this. Let me.”/

He's so desperateeeeeee 🥵🥵🥵 I love his little whiny stutters

/His eyes are unfocused as he comes apart above you, ears twitching and mouth falling open in wet pants. He burrows his head into the crook of your neck as he gets close, licking feverishly at the junction of your neck, the wet head of his cock bumping against your belly./

Bae, your writing is SUPER good. Like from a delivery (?) standpoint, the writing flows really well, you describe things very clearly, and the little details you provide (like the ear twitches, wet pants) just hit the spot. I can feel how desperate he is.

/Your fingers brush along his largest braid close to the skull before rubbing your thumb firmly against the base. His eyes roll slightly as he gasps into your mouth, hips spasming unevenly as his orgasm wracks through him./

OMGGGGG A TINY BIT OF SURPRISE KURU PLAY??? And he orgasmed from it!

enter, sandman

↳ neteyam x fem!omatikaya!reader

content warnings | smut ( minors dni ), somnophilia, oral ( f ), praise and some dirty talk, desperate neteyam, masturbation ( m ), characters are aged up !

word count: 1886

notes | pretty light on the actual prompt but here is my first submission for romancing pandora ! day one — somnophilia, turned out pretty fluffy but who doesn’t love some pussywhipped neteyam, enjoy friends

na'vi dictionary | syil — meer deer ; olo’eyktan — male clan leader ; yawnetu — loved one / lover / beloved person ; tewng — loincloth

You and Neteyam had been circling each other your entire lives, opposing forces drawn to one another despite all your innate differences. You admired each other from afar for years, skirting looks and kind greetings eventually evolving into shared dinners and stolen touches beneath the eclipse.

It was new and terrifying, having the eyes of the future Olo’eyktan so filled with adoration and lust and hope whenever they laid on you.

When Neteyam finally approached you officially to ask for you to be his—in body, in soul, in life—you were sure the earth beneath you shook with the force of your love. You were euphoric, giddy with the prospect that the man you desired so fully from the time you were children wanted you as well.

Some questioned his choice, though it was always clear to you how well you fit in each other’s lives. You weren’t a skilled hunter or forager, but you had a kind heart and strong mind, making you perfect for teaching the younglings of the clan. Neteyam was a born warrior, a boy made of steel bones and gunpowder. Where he had to be strong and immovable, you could be adaptable and kind, giving each other a perfect balance in life.

Being bonded to Neteyam was a lot of pressure, no doubt. Some expected you to be perfect, while others criticized you for being weak, a never-ending pull at your heart. It was all easy to brush off when Neteyam’s strong hands caressed your shoulders.

It helped too that your chemistry grew indescribably as your relationship progressed. The two of you were crazy about each other, hardly capable of containing the heat and excitement you felt in your newly blossoming relationship.

His hand would often find your thigh throughout shared meals, inevitably ending with the two of you sneaking past the trees and with his head between your legs. You would visit him on his breaks from teaching, stealing kisses and teasing touches away from the eyes of the younger warriors. You were often teased by your friends about how you could not keep your hands from your betrothed for more than a minute.

It was part of what made the time apart so unbearably aching.

You knew he had to leave. The syil, a normally elusive creature, would be gathering for mating season in valleys a few days' ride away. The hunting party had been planned for weeks now, with Neteyam at its head. It was a great stride in showing the clan his leadership skills, the longest hunt beyond the village he would lead on his own. The reap of the hunt would be great, sustaining the clan through many days and providing countless pelts for the cold season ahead. 

It did little to stave the emptiness in your heart or between your legs.

It grew lonely at night, especially in the cold drizzles of the rainy season when the hearth fires fizzled. You tucked yourself beneath woven mats, huddling against the soft fibers for warmth as your body craved the solid weight of Neteyam behind you. After what felt like hours of restless turning and shivering, a lonely sleep crept over your mind.

A heated groan rouses you from your slumber.

Your fingers tighten along the edge of the woven mats, flung to the side to expose you to the night’s chill, cooling against your heated skin. Your hair sticks against the curve of your neck, wet with sweat. There was an insistent nudge between your legs and a weight at the bone of your hip, pressing you firmly into your sleeping mats.

Light of the eclipse shadows across your home, dimly illuminating Neteyam’s face where it lay nestled between your thighs. There was a flush high on his cheeks, pupils dilated to show only a thin ring of gold as he gazed upon you. A small moan rumbles across the sensitive flesh of your folds as he notices you blink awake.

“‘Teyam-what the, oh-” Sleep still reached at the edge of your consciousness, muddling your thoughts as an easy pleasure trickled through you. Your hips move before your mind catches up, rutting towards Neteyam’s wide tongue as you moan. You could hardly think clearly with Neteyam’s tongue on you when you were fully awake, now your brain felt completely like mush.

“I’m sorry, yawnetu, I could not wait. You looked so sweet-'' His voice was weak and breathy, and you vaguely noticed one hand snuck beneath his tewng to palm at his cock.

Fuck, he feels so good and so right between you, but when did he get here? When did this start? Great Mother, why did you like it? You could see him in your mind’s eye, tired and worn from the long hunting trek, overcome with such want for you that waking you barely crossed his mind. In your head, he was needy and wanting, thinking of nothing but how he couldn’t stand to be apart from the wet heat between your legs for another second. The thought made you indescribably hot, legs trembling at the voracious way he gripped your hips as he dipped his tongue down into your entrance.

Your tewng hangs half-off your left thigh, rumbled and glistening with either saliva or your juices. Neteyam’s lips are soft and wet, trailing lightly between your slick folds. You try to gather your thoughts between the jolts of pleasure, bringing one hand down to stroke across your lover’s head. “Y-you’re back early.”

“The rains were too heavy, left early.” His fingers massage the plush of your thighs, trailing back up to trace the line of glowing freckles across your stomach. You squirm at the feather-light touches, inching your hips back to his panting lips. “Haah-such a nice present waiting for me at home, yawnetu, all spread out and waiting. Did you miss me?”

“I-I did, I—shit ‘Teyam—missed your mouth, your cock, please.”

“I know, baby, I know, let me give it to you.” His mouth fell back on you, slow licks on the sensitive skin around your labia, skirting around your hole and dipping into the junction of your thigh before darting against your clit. He breathed heavily from his nose, inhaling your scent as your legs tightening around the sides of his head increased the throb in his cock.

Your moans increase as his wide shoulders bully your thighs further apart, tongue giving wide and strong strokes against your clit before sucking it between his shining lips. You can feel the heat growing and tightening at the base of your stomach, fluttering against the dip of his thumb into your cunt. 

The slick sounds of your arousal weave in between the wet sounds of his moans, hot and yearning as they vibrate through your clit and into your bones. You can vaguely hear the sound of him working his own cock, imagining the way the tip peeks between his thick fingers to leak onto himself as he devours you. He always looked so pretty when he worked himself over, eyes blown and pleading.

The movements of his tongue quicken with the pace of your whining moans, finally moving to rub firm circles over your clit that have you keening into his hot touch. Your fingers card through his braids, using the grip to keep his mouth firm against your mound. As if he had any plans of moving.

“That’s-fuck-feels good, baby, but-want your cock,” You mewl, fingers tightening around the back of his head. Your voice hitches with every labored breath, pussy clenching on emptiness with every beat of your racing heart and it’s been so long, your body craves for him.

“Just wait, yawnetu, soon. I-I need to taste you.” He mumbles the promise into your folds, gasping and panting into you with each tug at his cock. His face is near rutting into you, nose bumping at the top of your pussy and inhaling deep breaths of your sweat and slick. “Thought of it the w-whole time, just like this. Let me.” 

The deep breathiness of his voice has arousal shooting through you. You know neither of you will probably be awake long enough to see through on that promise, but it doesn’t really matter. It’s enough to have him here, now, delighting himself so fully with eating at you that it has him desperate and breathless. His moans rumble through you, whispering praises and encouragements into the wetness of your core as he drives you closer and closer to the edge.

“Fuck, Neteyam.” You have one hand on the back of his head, the other gripped tightly into the woven mats as pleasure begins to crest over you. “I-I’m gonna-”

“Yeah? Come on, yawnetu.” You swear you see a devilish grin at the corner of his lips before your eyes clench shut in pleasure. 

Your orgasm rolls through you with a gasping breath, legs tightening around Neteyam’s shoulders as pleasure runs wet and hot from deep in your stomach to every edge of your body. Neteyam groans against you when you tighten under him, tongue swirling softly against your clit until you’re twitching against him, voice heavy with pants of his name and begging him to just get over here already.

Neteyam’s hand is still gripping at the meat of your hip when you open your eyes, now merely inches from your face as he holds himself above you. His hand moves fast and tight on his hard cock, eyes hooded in pleasure.

“Fuck, you’re so pretty-haah-got me so close, baby.”

His deep blue skin is shining under the eclipse with perspiration and your slick, the little freckles over his cheeks and shoulders glimmering lightly. You let your eyes sleepily rove over his wide shoulders and muscled chest, taking in every inch of how fucking good he looks above you.

Your eyes are glassy with pleasure as you gaze up at him with wet lashes, each brush of him against you sending you twitching in sensitivity. “I want it on me, please Neteyam.”

His eyes are unfocused as he comes apart above you, ears twitching and mouth falling open in wet pants. He burrows his head into the crook of your neck as he gets close, licking feverishly at the junction of your neck, the wet head of his cock bumping against your belly.

You reach behind his head again, bringing his forehead to rest against yours, eyes drawn on his face as he groans with each stroke. Your fingers brush along his largest braid close to the skull before rubbing your thumb firmly against the base. His eyes roll slightly as he gasps into your mouth, hips spasming unevenly as his orgasm wracks through him. His hand tightens on your hip, tip of his cock rubbing against you as he empties himself onto you.

The heat in you is slow and lazy, something that will creep into your dreams to be dealt with in the morning. Your bones feel heavy with Neteyam’s heat cuddling up next to you, mind already fuzzy with edges of sleep.

Neteyam’s face is lax in pleasure, nuzzling into the side of your body and pulling you taut to him. You can already hear his breathing evening out with the beginnings of sleep as he mumbles into your hair. “Missed you, yawnetu.”

“Welcome home, ‘Teyam.”

tags | @tallulah477 ; @eywaite @neteyamsoare

[shipwreck-letters]

Cooking with Rainier 🥘🥪

This was such a fun prompt, I really liked this! I hope you enjoy! <3

Reblogs/Comments appreciated 💌

-Rainier would be so happy that you're learning with him! He spends all night looking for human-safe recipes that he wants your opinion on; He takes your word very seriously. 

-Since Rainier comes from a world that seems more hobbit-ish/Middle Earth-like (Going by the magic, the dragons, the Magister) the dishes he'd be familiar with would most likely be very meat heavy, savory and with earthy vegetables like potatoes, turnips, and gourds (squash, pumpkin, etc) 

-To be honest, though, I think he'd be alright eating raw meat, but it is nice to learn how humans use fire to make such delicious smelling and tasting things! 

-In the kitchen is Rainier's specialty. It seems like it was there he was unbothered, and he could experiment with different things to his liking. (At least things he wouldn't have to feed the Magister) 

-If you're not very kitchen-savvy, it's a learning-teaching process together! Although Rainier is familiar with some ingredients, it's not in the Scorching Summit; It's on Earth. And yet, modern stoves and ovens are so amazing and convenient!

-"It cooks that fast? We don't have to wait all day for it?"  :O It’s a game changer. 

-If you're very good at cooking, Rainier is eager to learn alongside you directly! He wants to know how to make the softest bread, the best steaks, he wants you to show him how so that he can do it for you later! 

-It's very adorable when you guide his hands, he's focusing on the task so hard, but also wants to flirt with you- So he does both! 

-"This is amazing!" He says, taking a bite of a treat you made. "It's sweet, and pretty. Just like you." He grins.

-"I can't imagine doing all of this without you. It wouldn't be the same, it definitely wouldn't taste as amazing."

-If you accidentally spilled something, flour or icing on your face, he'd absolutely kiss you to get it off. "You've got something on your face, MC." smooch "Got it!"

-Do it back to him, he'll be caught off guard but it'll be cute. It may or may not turn into "a battle afterwards, leaving you with 1/4 less batter than you needed. 

-On tough days, whether it's housework or something else, he doesn't mind cooking dinner for everyone. But he always appreciates it when you join him, to cook or to just be there with him. 

-shaking and sweating Dorian/Fictif, someone on tumblr, post Rainier's bio that tells his favorite food I'm begging you, please- What do you need from me? What do you want? 

-Until that day, he loves to make his own spiced mead, it warms the soul. It's good for your soul. 

-Having a meal with the one you love and then getting to curl up and drink cider and mead...Perfection. Nothing like it. He loves those days. 

-Rainier will always be your taste-tester, and give feedback if something’s missing or too much. He usually has a good idea what to add or balance out, but sometimes he just likes to eat what you make, and won’t complain when you pass over another spoon. 

-I think he would also stress bake. He might not eat any of it, just making dozens of dozens of simple treats until he doesn’t feel so down anymore. The only potential problem is…Will you eat 56 cookies with him? 

-For some foods, here's a few I picked out that I think would work well! These are medieval dishes by Max Miller, a super entertaining channel with history and amazing recipes all in one! 

-Sambocade Cheesecake 

-Aztec Chocolate - Blood and Spice

-Quesadillas Cernidas

These are some that look good to me! But any culture or nation you come from, Rainier would no doubt love to try everything! Anything you make, he’ll eat. So get cooking!

~End~

[misspearly1]

Anon Request

A very kind reader of mine came to me through my private messages and requested that I write a fic based around the concept of How Joel Would Deal With His Significant Other Having a Chronic Illness.

She has shared that she has Hypocalcemia, so this is what I am going to be writing about. This lovely lady has asked to remain anonymous, so of course this will be respected!

I would like to use this opportunity to thank her once more. I am so happy and massively honoured that you came to my blog to write this. Stay safe my friend and I hope this new year brings many blessings for you.

I want to really dive into this one, tear it down and emphasise fully on how I think Joel would handle this, therefore I'm going with two parts.

The first being a brief breakdown on how Joel would deal with this throughout the different timelines, then second part, I am going to write a oneshot personalised to Anon.

With her permission, she has allowed me to mention some of her more personal experiences with the illness. Please enjoy, my lovely readers and to you Anon, I very much hope you enjoy this too <3

I'd also like to drop a link to a website that goes into more detail about hypocalcemia and to hopefully bring more awareness - https://www.healthline.com/health/hypocalcemia

Without further ado, let’s jump into this 😄

Part 1 - Brief Breakdown Throughout The Timelines

2013 - Pre Outbreak:

Joel would be a very supportive partner. Always there for you. During your appointments. In your times of need. Taking care of you at home. If your well being begins to decline, Joel will be right there, by your side.

Although your medications keep a handle on everything, that doesn't stop Joel from helping in every way he can. He will keep plenty of calcium rich foods around the house and learn how to cook meals that are high in the vitamins that you need.

Now, during your bad times, this would be where he really comes through. Joel would be very attentive to watch out for the signs & symptoms. The numbness and tingling feelings, the muscle spasms or shortness of breath, Joel will always be looking out for these things.

“I'm right here beside you baby”// “just rest darlin, sleep and let me take care of yer” // “I love you, y/n” // these are many of his whispered reassurances into your ear when you are unwell.

2013 to 2033 - During Outbreak:

This time period would be a lot more difficult for either of you to cope. Given the fact that the ‘normal’ world is gone now, it would make it harder to handle your illness as medicine, doctors and hospitals are a pretty much gone.

That being said, Joel Miller is a fighter and a survivor. Nothing will stop him from taking care of his lady. He will raid every pharmacy, every hospital and every doctor's office to get the necessary medical supplies that you need.

He will fight and kill to get you the medicine and food that you need. It’s brutal, and maybe even shocking but Joel Miller loves you, and in a world of death & despair his morale cannot be questioned when your life hangs in the balance of his hands. so, if that means killing to get you the meds that you need, then he is damn well going to do it.

When you are unwell, Joel will never leave your side. While he may have a sparse collection of medical supplies, and maybe even be reduced to a rag, Joel would never leave you.

I can imagine Joel would be quiet while tending to you, almost too quiet, but when you are sleeping, that is a totally different story. His eyes never leave your body, he wont sleep and knowing that you cannot hear him, this is where he feels safe to talk out loud.

“I love you, y/n” // “I'm going to make it better” // “just get better for me” // “god! I can't imagine going on without you” // “so please, don't leave me too”

When you’re awake, Joel seems so relaxed, calm and too damn quiet, but when you are sleeping he confesses how worried he is, and he repeats how much he loves you like a mantra.

Present Time - Jackson Community:

Twenty years into the cordyceps virus, you and Joel are still fighting, still surviving together and better yet, living comfortably within the safety of the walls that make up the Jackson community.

Still, there isn't the luxury of medicine being easy to grab on hand, however, there is a whole community by his side. Doctors and nurses, all willing to help adhere to the care that you need most.

As well as them, he has his brother, sister in law and your surrogate daughter, Ellie by your side, all of them equipped and ready to help in any way they can. Joel wont need to fight or kill anymore, he has all of these people who care for you, just as much as him.

That doesn't exclude that when you do fall unwell he doesn't worry, because Joel will always worry for you. You are his lady, his woman and soulmate for life, so Joel will never stop worrying about your safety and wellbeing.

Granted, he has more help than he did during the outbreak, but Joel will still, like always, be right by your side, telling you how much he loves you. Everyday and all day until you get better.

Part 2 - Personalised OneShot

Warnings: Light smut (kissing) Fluff and talk of Violence, the setting is during the outbreak. NO MINORS 🔞 18+ Content.

For Better or For Worse, in Sickness and in Health

Joel Miller was once a dependent father, a loving husband and doting brother, while he may have these characteristics buried somewhere underneath his hardened exterior, now he has been reduced to a ferociously driven man.

He is the man that gets things done. He is the one who anyone and everyone can trust with their lives, literally. But that trust does not come so easily.

So, If you have the trust of Mr. Miller on your side, then you are damn well fucking important to him and you, y/n, his wife, his soulmate and the love of his life, are his number one priority.

After the death of your daughter Sarah, you see just how driven Joel is everyday to make sure that he never loses you. He fights every day to prevent that fate, or else he simply would lose himself without his wife too.

Joel lost a chunk of himself, but you are the one who is keeping him alive, keeping his humanity, you are the one that keeps him going.

When he took your hand in marriage many years ago and vowed, to have and to hold from that day forward, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, until death do you part - that was a vow for life and so, Joel will stop at nothing to keep you alive.

Ten years into the Cordyceps outbreak, a terrible fungal virus that attacks the brain of any host and wills them to kill, eat or tear another person apart, Joel finds himself doing just that. It’s his duty and his job to fight his way through this dark world everyday, with you right by his side.

“You stay right here. You don’t say a word, you don't move and you let me handle this, you got that y/n?” holding your face gently and sounding dangerously serious, you can hear the plea in his voice, so you don't protest.

You need a safe environment, somewhere secure and protected. So you find yourself on the outskirts of a QZ, trying to find your way inside through an army of infected.

Joel had stopped while running through the streets and alleyways to turn to you. Holding your face, with his eyes wide with worry, he stopped and told you to hide while he does what he does best.

Placing your own hands over his, your eyes close and a single tear rolls down your cheek. Joel pulls you in close, holding you tightly and kisses your lips “I will be right back. You just gotta stay here for me, baby. Can you do that for me, please?”

“Yes” your whispered confirmation has him corralling you through the back door of a building and giving you one last look. Joel nods his head and mouths the words ‘I love you’ before he shuts it.

The dark silence from within enveloped you while the battering sounds of rain hit on the door. Closing your eyes again, you stated out loud to the silence “I love you too”

It's been three days of absolute hell in this city, you and Joel have fought almost every hour of those three days trying to get to here. With one too many close calls on your medical illness, it was you who was convincing Joel to relocate, to find somewhere a little more secure than the beaten and run down farmhouse you stayed at.

That farmhouse was between the QZ and a small town. Tess, a woman from within the the walls would pass your farmhouse to meet with a man named Bill in the seemingly deserted town, so after a very long time of making friends with her, building up the trust and learning everything there is to know, you convinced Joel to move to the QZ and become Tess’s smuggling partner.

This way he could get the medication he needed for you by working with her, another way to earn opposed to being out there, looting everything he can get his hands on and it would help that you were within the walls of someplace safe, which is guarded by what remains of the government, the Federal Disaster Response Agency (FEDRA).

That farmhouse may have been run down, but it was only meant to be a temporary home. After a few months of it being quiet and somewhat secure, Joel and you found yourself fighting off wave after wave of infected every so often.

It was becoming too much to upkeep, with that on top of your daily tasks to take care of your medical needs, you needed a secure environment to take the load off you and your husbands shoulders, so that was the reason for you to leave.

Now though, as you sit here in this unknown building at the foot of the steps, you aren't so sure if that was a good idea. “Joel is strong, he will be ok and he will be back” speaking to yourself like a crazy woman, you try to appease the arising anxiety’s of Joel's safety, but it’s not working.

Walking up the steps, you piece together that this building is actually a recording studio and park yourself on one of the seats in a booth. Placing your head into your hands and hunching over, you close your eyes and rub your temples as the headache is pounding your brain.

On top of everything that is happening, you didn't want to worry Joel that your health is beginning to crash again. you can feel the tingling sensations running across your hands and feet.

So even if it may be subtle to start off with, you know your body best and you know that if you don't get a handle on it now, it will worsen, but unfortunately, your medications are in his backpack.

Grabbing some food from your own backpack, a can of sardines in particular, you open them up and eat them. It is rich with calcium and will have to make do for now until Joel gets back. Curling up in the seat, you lay back and worry more about where he is.

A little while later, your eyes are closed and you're cringing with discomfort as the pain is worsening. You feel disoriented and extremely tired, but just as your muscles are beginning to cramp, a large hand lands onto your leg and your eyes spring open.

“I’m here baby... I’m here now” Joel heaves deep breaths in front of you while on his knees. Grabbing his bag hastily, he retrieves your medication and hands you a drink while assuring you “I got you baby girl”

You opened your eyes through wincing with pain and looked at him, then grimaced “did you take care of the runners?”

Joel is covered in blood, no doubt from killing the infected that was chasing you both, he nodded his head and you closed your eyes once more.

Leaving you on the chair momentarily, he goes to find a water source and comes back to start a small fire by the window that he climbed through. After removing all of his clothes and replacing them before cleaning himself up, Joel comes back to you.

Lifting you off the chair, he carries you over to a makeshift bed of laid out sheets and blankets beside the fire. Instantly, he is at work, Joel knows what to do and how to help ease your pain, so he starts by massaging your aching cramps.

After that, he will use the water he found and heated up, to dip a rag inside. Using that heat to loosen up your muscles and to further ease your discomfort, he will joke “Did you miss me?”

His humour is rare these days and he knows how much it can brighten your spirits, so he adds to that. “Hm, I know I aint easy on the eyes but I missed you beautiful”

Peeling your eyes open to look at him, Joel smiles goofily at you and it makes you giggle. His voice is peaceful to your ears even if you can hear the worry in his tone, that smile of his is everything to you, even if he is putting it on.

You can see right through it and you take his hand in yours to reassure him instead. “I had some food while you were gone and the tablets will kick in soon baby”

Joel sighs and drops his shoulders, he relaxes knowing that it wasn't too late. That food you ate makes all the difference as you could be a hell of a lot worse right now, so he sighs with relief and leans down to plant his lips on yours.

“Just rest for me darlin, I'll be right here when you wake” mumbling into your lips before pulling back, Joel moves a piece of hair out of your face and turns his attention to the fire. He needs to cook some food, something better than the can of sardines that you ate.

Standing up and going back to the window, Joel steps out to grab two big rucksacks and brings them inside. Opening them up, he pulls out all the contents and rifles through the food he has acquired.

There’s a couple kiwis, apricots and oranges, a few bags of assorted nuts, dried figs, tins of cooked soybeans and a healthy supply of tinned seafood too.

In the other bag there is some warmer clothing and weapons. With everything emptied out, Joel goes to discard the backpacks and stops to look at a name tag inside, ‘property of David Anderson.’

Dropping his gaze, Joel looks to you sleeping on the floor beside the fire and shakes his head “all they had to do was leave me be”

While Joel was gone, he had directed the infected away from you and they followed him into a grocery store. Once inside, he had taken care of them and then ransacked everything he could get his hands on to bring back with him, however a couple of people came across him doing this.

So he looks at his wife lying on the floor and nods his head, speaking to himself “they shouldn't have gotten in my way, baby girl”

If someone were to ask Joel how he would cope with handling his wife's hypocalcemia illness in this world, today would be one of the many examples of how he does that. When two men tried to steal the necessities that you needed from him, Joel had to fight them off and kill them.

So in conclusion, there is nothing in this world that could stop him, he is a fighter and Joel Miller will do anything and everything in his power to fight - for you.

——————————————————————————

@marydjarin @extraneous-trip

[aenngelic]

I will protect her at all costs (chapter 2)

Disclaimer: please don’t hate me for it, if you don’t ship them please just don’t read it ok 🥲

contains: slow burn, Sniper falling in love with Kuon, Snipers view/thoughts, sexual fantasies, nudity, lemon stuff overall

It is a very long chapter I’m sorry

Note: please feel free to message me if you have certain romantic moments to include in the story! (Already running out of ideas oops)

It did not take long for us to find a bag of supplies. It was on a coffee table in some sort of lobby area. It seemed as if this building probably was meant to represent some kind of hotel, which I thought was a good thing, because that meant that there would be beds and showers to be found here as well. To our surprise, the bag contained mostly candy, which I wouldn't interpret as a balanced meal. However, the girl seemed to like this finding. It was only a matter of minutes before the chocolate residue stained the corners of my companion's mouth in a brown color. However, I preferred to smoke a cigarette at first and watch the girl devour her own body weight in the form of chocolate.

" This is fantastic! It feels like forever since I last ate chocolate! I faintly remember dieting before I entered this world too, so this must have been probably weeks since I held chocolate in my hand." Kuon said with delight. It was amusing to watch her enjoy sweets. Kuon's carelessness may be a burden at times, but her innocent character makes up for it.

" you partly remember your life prior to this, don't you?"

" Yes, not much to be honest. I'm sorry you can't," Kuon replied in a concerned voice.

"Tell me about it."

She gave me a visibly puzzled look before straightening her back so that she was sitting as straight as a candle on the sofa across from me, staring at her hands somewhat lost in thought. She seemed uncomfortable that I had now brought up this topic. Unfortunately, I could not take back my question. "Well," she began, "to be honest,the life I remember has not been the greatest, I guess." Kuon abruptly shook her head. " That's not true either. I was born into a rich family and had many privileges. My father owned a large company and had very high expectations of me from the very beginning. One day I was supposed to take it over. I was probably pretty lucky compared to other people. I was probably a big disappointment for him. My character was just not strong enough in his eyes. I also remember not really having any friends either, because I was privately educated. And anyway..." I could literally hear the lump in Kuon's throat as a tear began to stream down the girl's cheek.

" i'm sorry. You know, I didn't really mean to end up crying."

I felt my heart break once again, watching the girl grieve. I was surprised now, though, to find out that this yet seemingly uncomplicated high school student was actually carrying a lot of emotional baggage. I did not hesitate as I jumped up from my seat to calm the blue-haired girl. I really hated it like the plague when she cried. Trying to preserve my Coolness, however, I grumbled, "oh girl. What's wrong?"

I placed myself to her left, and pressed her against my shoulder while running my hand over her hair a few times. There was no way I could bring myself to face her, though. It would be too embarrassing and, after all, I was far from being the Prince Charming who would dry her tears with a silken tissue. Besides, I could not withstand the sight of her teary eyes. So there I sat, a weeping teenage girl wetting my blazer with salty drops of grief on my right, awkwardly staring off into the distance.

"It's, it's..." she stammered, not being able to form a word. "You're the first person I've been able to trust, and because of that, I'm kind of..."

She took a deep breath, "It makes me so unbelievably happy."

Almost for the second time that day, a cigarette nearly got stuck in my throat, but this time I was able to suppress my urge to cough. The girl seemed to really like me. But did I like her too? I would be lying if I said I did not care about her. And if she got killed, I could never forgive myself. It was astonishing how one could form such a strong bond with another person in such a short period of time. However, pouring out my entire feelings in front of her would not come close to the cool lifestyle I was pursuing.

" i'm also happy to have met you, Kuon.", i finally decided to answer after a moment of figuring out how to respond.

Kuon's face, which was still streaked with tears, started to smile again, which made me feel much relieved. However, it took her a while to completely stop her wailing . We remained in this position for a while, until at some point I realized that the girl had fallen asleep. Her head had lowered in the meantime even further toward the ground, so that after some time she was no longer leaning against my shoulder but much rather against my belly. When I noticed this after some time and looked down to the girl, a cute sight presented itself to me. Admittedly, on the one hand it felt nice to act as this girl's pillow. On the other hand, it triggered an immeasurable amount of embarrassment in me. But cool guys do like to take care of girls' comfort, don't they?

Therefore, I decided I'd rather not wake her up and hardly moved at all. I looked out the window to my right, watching the sunset and reflected on certain issues. I was thinking about Rika as well as the two girls we were trying to find and, of course, about Kuon and so many other things until my eyes started to close.

When I regained consciousness, the night must have settled in. Before I could even perceive my surroundings properly, I swiveled my head once to the left and once to the right and let my gaze wander through the room. Because the moon was particularly bright this night, everything around me had taken on a deep blue tone. It was so quiet around me that I could have heard a pin drop. In the next second I realized that I should not have fallen asleep in the first place. Somebody would have had to keep watch, after all! Crap! If an enemy would have come along the way, it certainly would not have been good for me and Kuon. I looked down to my thigh where the blue-haired girl was supposed to lie. I felt her place her head on my thigh at some point during the night, but when I looked down at my thigh, I could not find any girl. Where the hell was Kuon? A rational thinking person, as I was one, could of course assume that my companion did not necessarily have to be in danger, but could also have simply visited the toilet, for example. Nonetheless, my alarm bells started ringing immediately. Kuon was, after all, a young girl who, apart from the "rail gun", did not posses many possibilities for self-defense. So of course I was worried.

Without thinking much, I hopped up from the sofa, on which I had been napping a few moments before. In quick stride I wandered through the poorly lit hallway without really having a clue where I was heading. My head was foggy from the idea that the girl might be in serious danger. A few days ago, I probably would have accepted the fact that she was suddenly nowhere to be found and continued my journey. And now my stomach was already twisting at the thought of her getting in trouble.

Nevertheless, a short moment later, my heart pounding madly from the ever-repeating scenario in my head, I heard a noise at the end of the corridor. A soft, high-pitched humming was heard, drowned out by the pattering of many drops. Light emerged from the crack of a door on the left. Was she taking a shower? The feeling of relief spread through my chest, followed by some degree of annoyance. Why did the girl not wake me up? I took a few steps towards the door, but before I was about to reach for the door handle, I remembered that I should not do so. A gentleman never violates a lady's privacy. So I decided to wait.

I leaned against the local wall, one leg bent. Then I let my thoughts wander, while the pattering of the raindrops in the bathroom right next to me showed no indication of stopping anytime soon. A lady of high society must spend quite a bit of her life showering, I thought to myself. And before I knew it, the image of Kuon suddenly popped up in my head. In my imagination I pictured her body, wondering what it looked like completely naked. A bar of soap running over her plump breasts, leaving traces of foam on her soft, wet skin. A body swinging under the hot rainfall like a leaf in the wind, presenting its vivid buttocks. I wonder if she was shaved? Hardly had I been able to finish this dirty thought of mine and get mad at my filthy thinking when my ears picked up the sound of footsteps in the distance. And they were coming ominously closer.

Damn, I thought to myself and was about to reach for my rifle, only to realize that I forgot it next to the sofa where I had been sleeping. I had been so upset about her disappearance that I could seriously forget the most crucial item for our survival.What was I going to do? For a brief moment I was at a loss. Escape proved almost impossible at this point, since I was at a dead end and I could not force the approaching enemy down with any surrounding objects. Besides, if I escaped, it would only be a matter of time before the enemy would track down my helpless companion. In the next moment, almost instinctively, I reached for the door handle that led to the bathroom that Kuon had still claimed. Perhaps there were objects in the room that were suitable for fighting, or perhaps we could be lucky and not be found, I speculated in the heat of the moment. So I tore open the door and rushed into the bathroom, greeted by a hot haze that took over the entire area.

"Kuon!" I called out in a hushed tone.

Without hesitation, I pushed my way through the door that separated the shower from the rest of the bathroom as if I was walking through nothing. Until that moment, I had hardly given a thought to the circumstances of this situation. But at the latest, when finally the naked body of a schoolgirl jumped into my field of vision, I quickly realized this again. I was just about to violate Kuon's privacy. An obviously shocked girl looked towards me, that from 1 second to the other tried to cover herself desperately.

"Mr.Ma-", she was about to say, but I interrupted her raised voice by pressing my hand to her lips as quickly as possible.

While I was still in the act of stepping into the shower, I flicked the light switch in the same movement so that no sign of our presence could escape from the room. Maybe they would not find us here, I hoped at this point.

"There's someone out there," I whispered to the naked girl in front of me.

" if we are quiet, maybe we won't be found. If we are, then..."

Kuon replied to me with an unintelligible "Mmm" , which resembled the sound of a frightened gasp. My body had pressed so close to hers by now that I could feel the wetness of her skin soaking through my shirt. I had directed my face facing away from her so that I could sharpen my hearing for the footsteps I could hear. Furthermore , I did not want to add unnecessary tension to the whole situation. It was uncool enough to interfere with a naked girl taking a shower even if it was an emergency. My hand was still resting on her lips and even though I was wearing gloves and looking away, I could clearly feel the warmth building up in Kuon's cheeks. She was obviously blushing in this moment. But having her pressed against the bathroom wall while forcing my hand tightly onto her lips and not even keeping a distance of not 2 inches, I could not blame her.

For quite a while, we did not move at all. We listened closely to the footsteps, which came a little closer and finally slowly moved away from us again. Temporarily it was even so quiet in this bathroom that we could hear each other breathing. Kuon's breathing was fast and almost verged on hyperventilation in this situation. Because there was hardly any distance between our bodies, I could literally feel her chest rising and falling in short intervals. With each rise, her breasts brushed my upper body a slight bit. I tried, as always, to keep my composure and block out the fact that Kuon was completely naked. Only when several minutes had passed did my posture loosen and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Okay, we should be safe for now," I stated and let go of the girl.

I flipped the light switch and had to swallow.

Kuon had been naked before too, but it was only now that the danger was gone that I could really comprehend this fact. She had tried to cover her breasts with her hands and had simultaneously crossed her legs, looking down with a shameful expression on her face. However, the concealment attempt seemed to be unsuccessful for her. Although I only caught a glimpse of her appearance before I turned away from her as quickly as possible, I saw her entire beauty for a moment.Her breasts were in relation to her otherwise so petite body, large and plump. She had a narrow waist and perfectly shaped legs, in combination with her smooth, fair skin. And so she shaved, I could still tell. What remained most imprinted on my mind, however, was the look on her face.I of course preferred to see her friendly smile a thousand times more than this face that expressed pure shame. But I could not help but adore the sight of her big sparkling dog eyes looking at the ground helplessly.

My breath stopped for a moment, but then I quickly cleared my throat, my gaze already averted from her, scanning the room for a towel. I tried to hide the fact that I actually wanted to slap myself for the thoughts I was having. Luckily, my embarrassment was not visible through the mask. I had to change the subject immediately before the situation became even more awkward:

"Sorry, Kuon." , I mumbled. I was surprised myself by my harsh tone. It took me a while to recollect the words.

"You should let me know next time you decide to go somewhere else."

"Oh yeah right. I didn't mean to cause any trouble.", Countered the girl who also seemed to be a bit embarrassed. So it wasn't just me who was feeling uncomfortable about this situation. Without giving my companion another look, I threw a towel right over my head at her. I had a precise aim.

" I'm going to get my rifle. I forgot it in all the hurry near the sofa."

Just as I was about to open the door to step out, the girl interrupted my process by grabbing my arm with unusual intensity.

" can you come back here afterwards? Please?"

"That's what I was planning on doing anyway. I'll be waiting right outside the door," I replied, a bit puzzled by this question.

" but I have -." she interrupted herself, shaking her head slightly before continuing.

Then her facial expression regained its former composure, whereupon she gave me her typical, beaming smile. I could tell, however, that she did not mean it honestly. How I could tell that, I had no idea myself though. But did she want me to stay here with her?

" no you're right. I'll hurry up and be done in a few minutes," she said. While she was talking, she wrapped the towel around her body in a quick movement, fastening it in front with the help of a knot.

I had meanwhile turned my gaze back to her. Although Kuon was now dressed, it was difficult for me not to inspect her from top to bottom. Her entire body was still drenched in a hint of wetness, so that her skin was reflectingthe bright bathroom light. It was also slightly red from the hot shower water. I wondered if the red tint to her cheeks was also caused by that, or if I was responsible for it.I could not help but notice the way the towel just managed to hide all the places it was supposed to cover and yet was far too tight. If she bent over, a special view would present itself to me. Immediately I dashed this disgusting thought from my head. If I continued to reduce myself only to her appearance this could end in negligence on my part and I would not be able to protect her properly.After all, that was the most important thing. I also discarded this thought. Had this strange girl really become so important to me? Nevertheless, there was no place for interpersonal relationships in this world.Before I could get any further into this train of thought, I turned away again and finally walked out of the room. I was in need of a cigarette.

[writingandmore]

Hi!!! May I get a HP, Star Wars, Voltron, and Disney matchup?

𝗕𝗔𝗦𝗜𝗖𝗦 + 𝗔𝗣𝗣𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗔𝗡𝗖𝗘

19, Libra, Neutral Good, enneagram is 4w5, muggleborn Ravenclaw (with Gryffindor tendencies), and my patronus spirit is Hummingbird. Biromantic Pansexual Genderfluid woman using pronouns of She/Her or He/Him. Cherubic-like face, with short height (5'1") plus sized Southeast Asian woman with Spanish descent that has chic messy/wavy brunette medium hair that reaches to my shoulder, oriental skin, slightly upturned eyes, small lashes, chocolate brown irises, cute flat nose, heart shaped face, full cheeks, cupid's bow lips, a small beauty mark on the forehead, and naturally straight teeth with tiny gap in front (just imagine that it's a mixture of Marinette from 𝗠𝗶𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝗟𝗮𝗱𝘆𝗯𝘂𝗴, Musa from 𝗪𝗶𝗻𝘅 𝗖𝗹𝘂𝗯, and Alexandra Trese from 𝗧𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲---cause' my friend told me that I kinda look like them). My sense of fashion is in between emo and boyish plus korean glam, I sometimes let my hair down or styled like Lara Croft reboot.

𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗢𝗡𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗬

Distant, quiet, and timid at first making people thought I'm a demure, modest, and self-effacing that looks "immaculate" or "one of a kind" (due to my protective mom, a reason why I've never been in a relationship) but the truth is, dunno how to initiate a conversation, but a total opposite if I open up---friendly, ambivert, witty, laughing loudly on a daily basis---like my happiness is too shallow, super talkative, eats a lot (yeah I can finish a huge slice of cake or a meal in one sitting), awkward, daydreamer (I got embarrassed from knocking at the door even I'm inside the classroom 😂), EXTREMELY CLUMSY (mostly gets bruises from hitting, bumping my head somewhere, walking into something on my way, and being careless to my belongings), secretly likes affection, easily overwhelmed, prone to melt over wholesomeness, flusters on compliments, lightly blushes on cheesy banters, eager to share what I know (especially about Catholic Church---my past teacher joked that I'll become a saint because of it 🤣), oftenly speaks full of sarcasm with a lowkey crackhead energy citing meme references, and talented girl who can be your no.1 supporter and unashamed to be true to myself but can be awkward to strangers. In terms of leadership, I only educate and guide than being a prefect (I might take the role seriously), will lift my group when there's lacking/incompleteness. About doing projects in school, I become too extra and prepared for efforts, but I'll forget the process in the end.

The extent, I'm expressive, warm-hearted, willig to help, kind, intelligent, supportive, nice, creative, enthusiastic, laid-back, determined, tough, competitive, and feisty outside, but a real softie that can be childish and dramatic that cries so easily (but will enlightened real quick by smallest things that makes me smile) filled with doubts, frustrations, and insecurities with fear of failure that pushes off the limits to to please everyone because they might get dissappointed from expectations---I simply can't stop proving myself too much because I'm a survivor of bullying. But I still managed to be stronger than ever after I stumbled, even it's a slow burn process. I can be blunt, intimidating, harsh, and a douchebag if I receive ends or I got interrupted while doing something. Immature, headstrong, perfectionist, demanding, hesitant, jumpy, forgetful, overthinker, quick-tempered, sensitive, and anxious (no joke, my nervousness makes me think worse scenario will arrive). Though can be procrastinator and arrogant, I raised as a religious 𝖺𝗇𝖽 diplomatic youth, willing to fight what I believe (including my dreams and what's important to me) and what is right. In addition, I have a habit of staying up late and doing sign of the cross to ease nervousness.

Rowdy and feeling-brokenhearted and bitter friend in the group who fangirl a lot, swears like sailor, will call out on people that we loathe, will make fun of your stupidity (in a good way) before helping, and bring gossips, but a hopeless romantic and cheeky (makes banter with sarcasms or pick up lines as an endearment, but gets annoyed if I received sappy or offensive one), Still generous and concerned person in a subtle and different way.

𝗛𝗢𝗕𝗕𝗜𝗘𝗦

My hobbies are singing, drawing, roleplaying, listening to music, chatting/browsing on social media, conceptualizing, writing, and reading some stuffs. I'll include making corniest jokes/puns, sleeping, and dancing when nobody's around or walking like a model if I feel so bold (even I'm terrible at both xD). I also used to learn Italian language a bit.

𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘𝗦

Loves kittens, milk tea, singing at the karaoke, cartoons, iced coffee, memes, cute things, watching YouTube videos (mostly pageants, ASMR, edit audios, and mukbangs), also enjoys playing games on my sister's PSP. Sucker for arts, choir, poetry, night sky, makeup, fun/deep/dumb conversations, Christianity, documentaries (about saints, real crime stories, and inspirational people), reading interesting stuffs, talking about social issues, and creative writing, chilling both indoors and outdoors. Beside that, my music taste are like late 90s-2000s songs (mostly rock, pop, and country) sometimes Catholic songs, kpop and ppop, chocoholic, and a sweetooth as well.

𝗗𝗜𝗦𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘𝗦

Things that I hate are stereotyping, HUGE creepy crawlies (spiders, toads, snakes, and cockroaches), firecracker sounds, thunder and lightning, being left out, loneliness, heart break, blackout, and judgemental people. If I found out that someone hates or backstabbing or being rude to me, I won't hesitate to throw offensive criticisms, leaving them with a "I don't give a f" attitude. One random fact about me is, I 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 vent out EVERYTHING I despise in my entire existence---from bad soap operas to toxicity, worse scenarios in real life, and how terrible is my love life from unrequited feelings that I got, because it's a big deal for me, and I consider forcing me to do what I'm not into and manipulating me as my major pet peeves.

𝗧𝗥𝗜𝗚𝗚𝗘𝗥𝗦

In terms of triggers...I only have two which are ta𝖨king about divorce/annullment/separation because I came from a generational broken family (it sucks that some people I knew assumed that the reason why I'm overly unaware that someone is interested in me in secret, is I have "high standards" looking for a partner, but the truth is I'm strict and I have a personal preferences...I know my worth and I don't want settle for less!) and religion/beliefs discrimination, cause' there are reasonings that doesn't makes sense because some, sounds too hypocritical, like as if you're a morally good person.

𝗥𝗢𝗠𝗔𝗡𝗖𝗘 + 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗟𝗔𝗡𝗚𝗨𝗔𝗚𝗘𝗦

My love languages are quality time and gift giving, but I actually swoon over physical touch (especially cuddles and cute kisses) and words of affirmation when it comes to having a partner, though I get attracted so easily, matured but can be a goofy person who's nice, friendly, kind-hearted, loving, faithful, and excels in academics is my cup of tea. Whenever I have a real life crush (which is rare), I act the same but deep inside, my heart is about to explode and will eventually share to my trustful friends how I highly admire that person, however if they spilled the beans out, I'll obviously deny it and will cry if they like someone else, it will take some time for me to move on, now I don't care for them anymore.

Best Friends to Lovers is my ideal trope because I find it very cute since you already knew each other before dating (which happened to my 2nd cousin, she married her best friend!)---perfect balance for romance, laughters, comfort, and tears when it comes to sharing your vibes, being there through thick and thin, safe with embraces, and helping each other to grow.

𝗧𝗥𝗜𝗩𝗜𝗔𝗦

My best assets are smile, eyes, personality, singing voice, artistic skills, writings, intelligence, oratorical skills and I have potential in hosting...so I can consider myself as a singer, artist, orator, speaker, and a top student who's a former active campus ministry member with three roles (choir leader, psalm singer, and reader).

May sounds different but I'm passionate for helping people through my talents and sharing my story to inspire everyone. I may look selfish, but I have a different way on how I show that I actually care also I have a biased sentimental value

Currently a college freshman, learning how to cook. I have so many interests, to the point I don't know what I'm into because of my dreams to become a popular Filipino YouTuber, a novelist, and being part of a successful chorale competing internationally...I also consider joining pageants at school too once the pandemic ends, but maybe.

HP: Remus!

- Remus is also quiet and a bit reserved when he's not in a familiar situation, so your own first impression on him would be a good one, as you'd seem similar to his own personality. He's sweet and is able to start up a conversation if he notices the other person is having a hard time doing so, so hopefully he'd be able to bring out your more extroverted and friendly self after a while so he can be around the more open you. He wouldn't mind you being a bit awkward-he's very much the same way-honestly, the comradery that would come from that would be more positive than anything else. He loves sharing knowledge and learning about new things, so your eagerness to talk about what you know would work really well also! He does a lot better when he knows someone has his back too, so your extra supportive nature would endear him to you as well.

SW: Han!

- Your nicer and more helpful personality would balance out Han's more standoffish vibes when first meeting. You might get on his nerves a bit first, but you'd quickly grown on him and, in turn, make him a bit of a better person. Your ability to be blunt and a bit harsh would serve you well if you ever needed to stand your ground on an issue that two of you have, as he can be quite stubborn.

VLD: Lance!

- Lance can be a bit immature from time to time as well, especially when it comes to trying to be funny or cheering up those around him-he's also headstrong and typically firm in what he wants to do, so your own determined personality would attract him to you a lot as well. He often puts off things he needs to do if they make him anxious too, but if you both recognize that you share that problem, helping each other might be a good solution!

Disney: Flynn!

- Flynn is quite a sarcastic and teasing person, so your own humor would match well with his. He's also quite a hopeless romantic as well, even though he's certainly not one to admit that right off the bat. He enjoys singing, and as he gets closer to someone he feels more comfortable doing so in front of them, so a partner he's been with for a long time would get to see him be more and more open with it. That also applies to activities like dancing.

[imagineabrighterworld]

Sunshine in the Night pt.4

  It was futile to push through the crowds of students, but you still tried to weasel your way into the heart. There were reporters and students all swarming the front gate, all trying to get into the school for some reason or another.

You just wanted to get through and find your friend.

Somehow you managed to slip between the heated bodies and ran past your fellow students, ignoring their confused faces as you raced up the stairs to the 1-A classroom. You are out of breath, heart thudding against your ribs as you see the students mingling outside the doors. Some were already inside while others lingered outside, talking amongst themselves. Few had signs of injuries, most looked completely fine. The only sign of something having gone on is the vaguely haunted look in the students eyes, the way their eyes shifted about.

You hold a hand to your chest, panting and gulping in breaths. “Toko- Tokoyami!”

A student looks your way, her golden eyes bright compared to her black sclera. “Tokoyami?”

You try again, tears in your eyes, the panic rushing up your throat and curling around your vocal cords like a fist. “Tokoyami! Is he okay?”

The pink skinned girl jogs to you, placing a comforting hand on your back. “Woah there! It's okay. He’s not here yet but he's okay.” She frowns, “This is about the attack two days ago right?” They had closed the school the other day, wanting to go over security protocol before letting the students back on campus.

You nod. Any embarrassment you might have felt about acting so strongly- or strangely to some- was overrun by your worry for your friend. You had been hanging out with him more often, his presence always soothing. He acted dark and mysterious, but he was sweet and courteous. He never judged you when you spoke passionately about your interests, or had too many questions, or even the rare times you had nothing to say at all. He was a good friend.

Hearing about the attack on the U.S.J. with the students of 1-A being at the center of it all shook you to your core. You hadn't thought to exchange numbers with your friend so you had no way of knowing if he made it out safely.

"Look- my name is Mina Ashido by the way- you can stay here with me until he gets here okay?" She strokes your back soothingly, something you greatly appreciated. You were a stranger to her yet she treated you so kindly. Later on you would be thankful Tokoyami had such a nice girl in his class.

"Thank you." You tell her your name, your breath now evening out as you wait for the familiar face of your friend.

Mina moves the two of you closer to the wall to keep from blocking the door for the other students. She twiddles her thumbs before speaking up. "So, are you and Tokoyami a thing?" She questions in a playful tone.

"Us?" Your mind blurs. "No- we- we're friends. We only met this semester. I hope we're close but I don't think we know each other well enough for that." You didn't mind her question. In elementary when you were but a shy wallflower, it would have sent you into a blushing fit. But you've grown from that! Still, you felt your heart race just a bit at the thought of your chivalrous friend having some affection towards you.

“Do you want to know him more? So you can be like that?” She hints with a small smile. It was a small nudge. A sly suggestion.

Did you? Well, you could imagine it. He was a good person, a very good person if what you had learned so far had anything to say.

But there was something that held you back from exploring the idea any further.

“Maybe.” You respond quietly, eyes on the floor, hands now gripping the strap of your satchel. “I- I'm just afraid I'm not enough.”

“What do you mean by that?” She asks. But before you can answer her, she nudges you gently on the ribs, pointing to the end of the hall. “There he is!” She cups her hands over her mouth. “Tokoyami!”

The boy startles, his gaze first going  to Mina before snapping to you. His sharp eyes immediately soften. He quickened his pace, reaching you in a matter of minutes.

“Is there something wrong?” 

Rather than answer him you take hold of his hand and twirl around him, lifting each of his arms, searching for injuries. There was nothing, luckily, as you heard a few students had been in the heart of the battle as well as the homeroom teacher being badly injured. 

You exhale a sigh of relief and lower his arm. “You're alright.”

“You were concerned over my safety?” He inquires. “I was away from the heat of the battle, safe for the majority of the fight.” 

Calm washes over you, your shoulders losing their tension. “Thats good..” 

The bell rings, signaling class was to begin soon. You look to the stairs behind you, knowing your class was rather far from his. “I have to go, but I’m glad you were- are safe.” Remembering the pink skinned girl next to you, you quickly add, “And you too Mina.” 

The girl laughs, knowing you had forgotten she was there, but she wasn't offended. Watching your interaction with the boy in front of you both was amusing for her. He acted so aloof in class, it was sweet seeing him invested in another person. 

Tokoyami reaches out to you, his hand lowering from reaching for your shoulder, to your hand, then to his side. He clenches it into a fist. “I will see you at lunch, yes?”

You nod, “Yeah.”

“Until then.”

You nod to then both before turning and heading to class. 

- - - 

At lunch, you wait for Tokoyami underneath a tree in the grassy area behind the main school building. You hadn't touched your food, even your favorite meal wasn't enticing enough to urge you to eat. 

You thought of what Mina had asked you earlier. 

What was stopping you from wanting Tokoyami’s affection? You knew the answer. It wasn't him. In fact, you felt warm when he was around. You felt every metaphor for love you've ever read. Every single one.

But your indecisiveness was what stopped you.

He had a goal on what he wanted to be. You didn't. 

You were afraid you would drag him down, be a weight instead of someone who could grow with him. 

“There is something bothering you.” Tokoyami starts off as soon as he sits down next to you, setting his tray aside. “Tell me.”

“I’m starting to become a poet.” You lay back on the soft grass, tilting your head to look at him. “You've rubbed off on me and now I can’t stop thinking.”

“That’s good.”

“Not really. It’s like I have to run a marathon to grab a cup that's right next to me.” You poke his arm. “And you're the cup.”

Tokoyami lays down next to you, Dark Shadow pooling next to him, lazily dozing in the shade. “Tell me.” He repeats in earnest. 

“I think I like you.”

From beside you, you could feel him tense up. Out of awkwardness or shyness you can't tell. But it was out in the open now. You couldn't swallow your words back up. 

“It would be really easy to love you.” You look up at the branches of the tree above you, arms forlding over your chest like a mummy. “You're the kind of boy I read about in novels. Sweet and mysterious. Like dark chocolate with a creamy milk chocolate center. But I’m just a bitter truffle. I’m not at the point where I can be in the same box as you.” You look back at him. “Does that make sense?”

“It does.” He says in an odd tone, as if he was surprised that it did in fact make sense. 

You trudge onward. “I don't want my bitter to unbalance you. If I were to be something to you- or to anyone, I would want to be an anchor. A helper, not a weed that stunts their growth.” Your eyes flicker away from his. “You're my friend. I like it this way. If I can’t like you that way, I’d be satisfied with this.”

Now it was up to him. You felt you said your piece, the thoughts that had been swimming in your mind since you first heard his laugh. It was a small infatuation, but you weren't lying when you said it would be easy to love him. 

You could imagine days of sunshine and rain, and they would all be full of life with him by your side. It wasn't obsession. It was comfort and sweetness. It was calm in the eye of an unknown storm.

You hear the sound of ruffling as he moves onto his side, laying on his side to look at you properly.

“You are bittersweet. You are incomplete. But we can balance each other, piece by piece.” He offers to you, his words a soothing balm to the aching in your chest at the thought of him potentially pushing you away.

“I’m not too much for you?” You whisper. “I know I can be nosy and straight forward. It doesn't bother you?”

He chuckles. “No. I think you're just what I need.”

- - -

Extra:

“So, does this mean I can technically call you my boyfriend?”

“Whatever you are comfortable with.”

You give it some thought, turning over phrases of affection in your mind. What fit him? Boyfriend felt odd. You liked it but it didn't feel like the right word..

“My better half?”

He chokes on his apple, covering his beak with his elbow.

“Are you acting shy now?” You giggle, feeling lighter now that your feelings were out in the open.

“I- I am not against it in private.”

“Okay.. how about.. Romeo.” You shoot him a wink.

A smile tugs at his mouth. He nods in acceptance. “I will take it.”

You pick up your bottle of water, pausing to add a small note before taking a gulp. “As long as we don't go through with the whole poisoning bit.”

“I wouldn't dream of it my dear.”

- - -

Tag List: @evierena , @aradias-crypt 

[mytwistedhome]

Diasomnia members when they find out you have Anorexia

Trigger warning to anyone who suffers with an eating disorder!!

It’s one of those nights again... Writing these headcanons to give myself some solace. 

I hope this can maybe bring comfort to someone else, or at least provide some bit of entertainment. My intention is not to cause harm or trigger anyone. That is the last thing I want.

This time, these headcanons are for Diasomnia members. I’ve already posted ones for Pomefiore and Ignihyde (of which you can see on my blog, if you desire), and the other dorms will likely be posted the next time I need some self cheer-up.

I swear I’ll have some proper writings up tomorrow, and even more by the end of the week. And, I intend to keep my promises this time. Sorry, I’m really not much of an angel if I’m being honest. I sincerely apologize to the friends and the requesters of whom I’ve neglected. You don’t deserve to wait and wait just to see me break a promise and go back on my word. That’s entirely my fault, and with my whole heart, I am sorry.

💚

Malleus Draconia

So this is how humans hate themselves? How horrifically graceful...

Not gonna lie, he romanticizes the idea quite a bit at first

He watches with a morbid curiosity as you quickly grow thinner and thinner day after day, and how you stumble around weakly in a constant dizzy state

He finds it fascinating how a weak human can withstand such torture brought onto them by themselves

It really is odd, isn’t it?

You, a human, already bound to die after several years of life, are hurting yourself even further

You are so delicate... He's really enthralled. It's so strange how you hurt yourself in a sickly yet gracious way, and he cannot help but watch from afar

But, he knows that he cannot simply watch you forever as you kill yourself

He sees how much you are hurting and suffering, and he grows incredibly sad for you

You don't deserve to go through such pain. What ever made you decide to do this?

He can't possibly imagine what it must be like, and he becomes mournful over you

And he's now determined to bring you help, some way, somehow...

He tries to confront you about it. On those nights when the two if you run into each other outside the Ramshackle dorm, he'll make vague, elusive references to your starving yourself

The way he goes about it is oddly beautiful. He says things like "it's been several days since we've talked like this. You've grown thinner from before," and "it's often lonely and empty, the day's without you, much like how your stomach goes empty," or "you always seemed mesmerized by my abilities, particularly when I vanish from your eyes, but isn't it the same when you float through life in a dazed state of mind? From that dizziness brought on by hunger?"

And you're left with your mouth wide open, absolutely stunned. He knows. Somehow, he knows

But you still play dumb, wondering what in earth he means, knowing all too well what it is he means...

Malleus sighs sadly. The look on his face is incredibly hopeless and pitiful (and for a moment, you feel guilty for having brought him to such an emotion) before he crossed his arms and his look turns dour. He's done dancing around this topic

He's very straightforward now, telling you sternly that you need to stop this. Stop hurting yourself, stop killing yourself

He tries not to let his own feelings show, but his jaw softens and his lower lip trembles every now and then

You become overwhelmed with sadness, guilt, and self-hatred. Those are the exact emotions that Malleus was trying not to stir, but you just can't help it as he scolds you so seriously. Just how long had he known? How long had he been watching and worrying over you?

When he's done speaking, you let out a wretched gasp as you clutch your chest, your heart palpitating from the overflow of emotions, and the hunger, and the sudden movement

Malleus reaches out to you, his hands clutching your arms and steadying you on your feet as your knees buckle

He stares at you wide-eyed in shock, unable to say another word. He knows that you are weak and your health is poor, but what caused you to react in such a way just now?

Your stomach feels as if it's caving inwards, and a coldness spreads throughtout your body

Tears begin to well up in your eyes. You know that Malleus is worried for you, and you didn't mean to make him worry, but you really just wish he didn't know... That this could still just be your secret and you would get help on your own when you're ready

Oh, god... this didn't help. Somehow, this whole confrontation triggered you. Now you just want to starve yourself even more, continuing this way forever

But Malleus won't let that happen, even if it hurts you (as in, emotionally) to stop. Continuing this way would break his heart

Lilia Vanrouge

Lilia’s been around. He knows how serious eating disorders can get. I’m sure he’s seen other who have suffered or even died from it.

Actually, he was the one who suspected that you had anorexia

He noticed how you would pick apart your food before eating, how you chew so slowly, and how you are always eager to leave the meal table

Not to mention how you almost cower away in fear when certain foods are offered to you

Also not to mention how you gaze longingly at other people's plates

To him, it's obvious because he can pick up on all the subtle signs.

Confronting you is a bit tricky... He really doesn't know how to approach you about it in a way that will make you open up

When he's around you, he'll begin to ask you questions in concern

He'll often ask you if you're okay, if you're feeling alright, etc. You always lie

He knows you're lying, but he won't mention it. He'll just continue to ask if you're doing okay with sincerity every time he's around you

Eventually, you begin to realize that he is someone who might very genuinely care about you, and you are very touched by his concern. No one has ever been so worried about you before

One day, when the two of you are alone, you say something like "I'm actually not okay..."

And then you vent to him for a very long time

You even start to cry

He keeps silent through your venting, but he listens intently to every word you have to say

When you're done, he gives you a sad smile and tries his best to console you

He lets you know that you can reach out to him anytime you need

Overtime, he convinces you to seek help and receive actual treatment and recovery

Probably the most successful of all the guys in putting you on the road to recovery!

Silver

He is very taken aback

Truly, he doesn't know what to say or what to do

He immediately feels so, so bad for you... His heart mourns for all the suffering you must have been going through

He tries to be sympathetic... He really does

But at the same time, he's a bit worried about getting involved. How are you going to react to his knowing? Will you really take kindly to his concern? Or, will you push him away, as is so common a symptom of this disease?

He subtly watches you as you eat your meals. He's quite good at watching without making it seem so, and he uses this skill to keep an eye on you in concern

He sees how you cut your food into tiny pieces, how you push it around in your dish, hardly ever bringing the fork to your lips...

And his heart breaks. How pitiful it is to see you like this

He wishes he could just reach his arms out and somehow save you, help you... But that wouldn't work, would it? This is a very real problem; he can't just save you in a fanciful way, no matter how badly he wishes

He gathers the courage to approach you about it, just to let you know that he's aware of your struggle and that he's willing to listen if ever you need to talk to someone

He sits down beside you after classes one day as you're doing a bit of studying/reading. You what's you to feel as comfortable as possible, not like he's pushing you to open up if you aren't ready

You smile when you see him come close, happy to have his company

Well, this seems like it's off to a good start!

The two of you exchange a few words of warm conversation, but then a silence falls, and you see Silver's face darken, turning into a sad expression

And, after a bit of hesitation, he tells you that he knows... He knows how you starve yourself, and how you suffer, but assures you that all he wants is to help and be there for you

You are quite stunned, only staring at him blankly, unsure of what to say

It certainly cought you off guard, having him say it just like that...

After a moment, you thank him for his offer and for his concern, and you really do appreciate it

But... You are still very alarmed

You excuse yourself and head back to your firm, trying to take this all in

How long had he known...? You knew he was trustworthy and kind, but you weren't sure if you weren't sure if you wanted to let him in to such a private and major part of your life

From then on, you begin avoiding him, not wanting to let him in. It hurts him to see you hide away from him, but he expected this to happen

But then, one day, you are having it particularly rough, and you feel so miserable... You call Silver, just to hear his voice. Just to have some company. Just to feel like you aren't alone.

And he does everything he can to comfort you, listening intently to all you have to say

He doesn't push you to eat, or urge you to get help, he is just... there. And that is all you could ever ask for

He continues to be the friend of whom you seek out for comfort, and Silver is happy to be there for you whenever you need

Sebek Zigvolt

He finds out after he catches you in his arms upon your fainting

He's used to Silver falling asleep at random, but the way that you wobbled across the room, shuffling your feet and swaying as you tried to walk in a straight line, then spinning as your eyes rolled back, trying to find your balance as you babbled out incoherent sounds before sinking to the ground...

He's certainly not used to that. It terrified him to see you in such a state, and that fear turned into overwhelming worry for your well-being

He had rushed to your side before your head clashed with the hard ground. He wrapped his arms tightly around your shoulders as your head tilted back onto his chest

He gazes at you with absolute panic, his mouth agape and eyes wide with fear

He tries to shake you awake, but your head just bobs and your arms fall limply at your side, your legs having already given out entirely

In panic, he shouts for help while also loudly urging you to get up, wake up, and stand on your own two feet

Luckily, his voice was heard by a couple others (probably just Lilia or another elder student) who come rushing into the room

They see you passed out with your sickly pale and gaunt face, and they advise Sebek to immediately take you to the school's infirmary, to which he promptly obeys and carries you there

He leaves you in the care of the nurses, and the whole time that the two of you are parted, his mind is reeling with worry

He can't bring himself to relax at all. He's all strained and stressed over you! He's unimaginably worried. He really wants you to be alright...

When you finally return to your consciousness, Sebek is one of the first to know, and he immediately rushes to wherever you are, regardless if you're still feeling dreary

He, very loudly, bombards you with questions as he tries to make sure that you are alright

He's still in a bit of a panic... Are you sure that you're okay?

You assure him that you're feeling fine now as you chew and swallow your 180 calorie granola bar

Sebek is relieved, but now he's demanding answers. How did you pass out in such a scary way? What happened then? What's going on with you?

Your head starts to spin once again at his pressing questions. You can't just tell him that you don't eat

Like with Epel, you try to make excuses. First, you try telling him that you were just overheated

Sebek doesn't buy that; he explains to you that you felt cold to the touch and had goosebumps all over your body when he caught you in his arms

You then try to say that you are anemic

That could be true, but now Sebek knows you are lying, and he presses you even further

Tears start to well up in your eyes. You don't want to come forward with this secret!

But he keeps pushing you with his loud voice... You can tell that he cares, and you feel bad for making him worry so much

Maybe you can trust him...

On the condition of him keeping his voice down, you tell him. You tell him that you fainted because you purposefully don't eat enough

He doesn't take it too well... He actually grows angry

How could you do such a thing to yourself???

You beg him to please, please calm down. You try to explain to him that this is something you can't really help...

After you briefly try to explain, his brows furrow together, as if in a glare, but his eyes are so full of sorrow

His chest tightens in pain and pity... Pity and sorrow for you. That's what he feels. And helpless, as well, to your suffering

He pushes you to get help, urging you every single day

He wants to help more. He wants you to just be okay. Why can't you just wake up and not have this problem anymore? Why do you have to be this way?

But he feels like there's nothing else he can do...