#i only like to clean when master is home tbh

[dollservant]

ahhhh cleaning for master brings much joy and peace to my heart honestly, like i was feeling anxious earlier but as soon as he asked me to clean for him i was like oh!!!! doggy servant button has been pressed time to stop worrying about anything else and only think about doing the thing that master wants me to do

[lunarw0rks]

i forgot what i wrote in the ask that got eaten tbh but anyways more valeria thoughts because i need her

OH WAIT I REMEMBER

thoughts about valeria coming home from a long day and using you to destress but the day also wasn’t easy on you and one of her degrading comments goes a little too far, hits a little too close to home.

her being the absolute master of reading body language, catches onto the slight shift in your demeanor before you can even safe word/signal out and everything comes to a complete stop.

and like the switch between the domme/intimidating persona and the one where she genuinely cares about you is night and day. before you know it, she’s hovering over you, cupping your face in her hands and scanning you worriedly.

maybe i just need to be comforted… i think being in her arms would solve 99% of my problems tbh

-🎧

(it's egregious how long it took me to respond to this and i apologize pookie.)

﹌﹌afab!reader. dialogue would be in spanish. implied, notorious purple strap, naturally.

valeria is used to tears, whimpers, even you— clawing at her even when you don't want her to stop. she's a seasoned dom by this point, and even more so when she finds that one special partner.

though she loves you more than anything, she still uses you to distress. and we all know she's got loads of stressors, so it's more often than not you're subjected to some rough play. all in good fun. you're pampered endlessly afterward. and of course, it's pleasurable for you.

but sometimes it's just too much.

like any other hard session, you're limp below her at this point. so many rounds that you've lost count, and you can't feel your limbs. only the nerves ablaze at the apex of your thighs. the sting of her strap abusing your cunt repeatedly, past the point of pleasure. it's only seconds before you register the discomfort— and even less before valeria slows to a stop.

"shit." she curses, "i'm sorry, amor. was i too much?" kisses along your wet cheeks to pry you from your dazed state, until you give her a nod, a look, anything. it'd be dumb of her to expect you to get words out right now, and she's able to read you like a book.

even quicker, she reaches for a towel (fresh, folded, and laid out beforehand) and smooths it along your sweaty skin, her hooded eyes trained on you through it all. wipes you clean and cares extra for any bruises or marks.

absolutely no sessions for at least a while after. insists on having the chef make you something filling and made with love, all while she's getting you in some flexible clothes and clearing her calendar for the next day.

[wolfjackle-creates]

For the ask game, I feel like #1 and #13 go really well together. Cuddle curse plus drugged/cuddle drunk confession. Maybe with just a dash of #3 Misunderstandings if the recipient thinks it's just the cuddle curse talking.

Perhaps in the flavor of platonic Dead Serious (Danny/Damian)?

Since you specifically said Platonic Dead Serious, I hope you're okay with a Twin AU. Because I've had one on the backburner for almost a year now that's never been written. This wouldn't technically fit that fic, but it's still a trope I adore that I haven't written.

This will be about a month or two after Danny ends up at the manor. No secrets have been revealed yet. The Waynes only know that Danny wasn't safe where he was and came to Bruce for shelter. Danny only knows that they know about the League of Assassins but nothing about their nightlife.

Okay, wow, this got long. It has no right to be as long as it is. Anyway, enjoy the 2.8k of shenanigans I wrote! (It's way less angsty than I expected, tbh.)

-----

Danny walked into the library only to see Damian and freeze.

Damian stared back at him, neither moving a muscle.

Danny was the one to break the silence. "Damian."

"Danyal," was the curt reply.

Danny glared at his twin who ignored it and turned back to what he was working on.

"That's it!" shouted Dick.

Danny jumped. He hadn't seen the man standing off to the side; he'd been too focused on Damian.

"You two have been dancing around each other ever since Danny got here. Now, I don't know what history you have since neither of you will talk about it, but you have to at least be civil to each other. So you're going to have a bonding day tomorrow."

"Richard!"

At the same time, Danny said, "No!"

Then the twins were back to glaring at each other.

"He won't even call me by my name," protested Danny. "I hate Daniel and Danyal. I'm Danny."

"You are a Wayne and grandson to the Demon Head. It is beneath you to go by such a ridiculous diminutive."

"Oh yeah, because I want to be reminded of Ra's every time someone talks to me."

Dick physically moved between them. "Enough. This is what I'm talking about. Come on, there has to be something you both enjoy and can do together."

Danny shrugged. "I enjoy lots of things. Just not weapons and fighting because I spent too much time doing that when I was little. Now I just want to be a regular American teen."

"And the interests of 'regular American teens' are banal and insipid. I will not waste my time partaking in them."

Dick looked between them with his eyes narrowed. "You know what, there's a carnival in town right now. You will both be going there tomorrow for the morning. You can compete at the games if you need to compare skills, Damian. And there's junk food and sweets for you, Danny. Then after, I'll take you to the animal shelter to do an extra volunteering shift. That way you spend some time alone together to figure out your differences, you'll be in public the entire time so I don't have to worry about anyone being stabbed, and it caters to both your interests."

"I do believe that is an excellent idea, Master Dick."

Danny jumped again at the unexpected voice of Alfred behind him.

"In fact, I will drive you to the carnival myself. I expect both of you to be downstairs and ready to leave by nine thirty tomorrow morning."

"Yes, Pennyworth," said Damian. But based on his frown, he was not happy with the discussion.

Danny looked between Alfred and Dick, but couldn't think of a way to back out. "Fine."

---

Not even half an hour after they'd arrived at the carnival, Danny was ready to tear his hair out. And had sent several messages to Dick stating as much.

Damian was sneering at the people, at the food, at the very mud on the ground.

"It's mud, Damian. It won't hurt you."

"It will require me to do more work to clean my shoes before we can enter our home. For no benefit, either. This place is horrendous."

Danny sighed. "Can't you just relax, Dami? You're safe. No one is going to beat you if you let go a little bit."

"No. I can't." Damian moved faster, forcing Danny to half-run to catch up.

"Look, the game booths are up ahead. Let's see if we can't win some prizes. I'm sure Dick would love it if you gave him something you won."

"Everything is cheap and ugly."

"Exactly the sort of things Dick likes!"

"Very well."

With Damian next to him, Danny didn't dare cheat. For his first prize, Damian selected a large, stuffed elephant. Though after he'd received it, he stared at it with no idea what to do next.

"You carry it around with you! We want to have so many prizes between us we can barely walk."

"That seems idiotic."

Danny nudged him. "Look, they're stuffed animals. I'm sure the shelter will take any you don't want to keep."

Damian hummed just like Bruce and made his way to the next booth. Danny won that round and the competition was on.

The next half hour passed much more pleasantly than the first. Until the ground started moving under them. Danny and Damian were two of the few who kept their feet as vines shot up from the soil and wrapped around the rides and huts and trailers.

Poison Ivy rose above them all and began screaming about how this meadow had been home to an endangered flower before the fair destroyed the habitat.

Danny and Damian both moved towards the woman rather than away like everyone else.

But Poison Ivy wasn't done with her monologue. Buds swelled on the vines. "Now, to distract you while I destroy this corporate evil."

"Come on, Damian!" called Danny. A bud burst open into a flower in front of him and Danny tried to duck, but it released a puff of pollen.

Both he and Damian got a face-full. Instantly, Danny could feel a tingling spreading out from his lungs and he reached back to grab Damian's hand.

"Any idea what that was?"

Damian gripped his hand just as tightly and the two continued to fight their way forward, now close enough to bump shoulders.

"Dr. Isley has many pollens with different effects. What symptoms are you experiencing?"

Danny shivered and pulled Damian closer. "Cold which is weird. Cold hasn't bothered me for years now. And I feel itchy. Are you feverish? Your hand feels warm."

Damian moved in closer until their arms were pressed together and Danny felt some of the cold recede. "No, but I know what we have been attacked with. It is a pollen to promote physical closeness."

"Cuddle pollen? Seriously? Sounds like something I would've had to deal with back... Just before. Isn't Gotham known for things like fear toxin or whatever? Cuddle pollen seems out of character."

"Dr. Isley is more concerned with her plants. If she can keep the humans preoccupied and stop them from interfering, she doesn't much care how it's done. And it is hard to fight her when you are desperate to hold onto each other."

Danny slipped on the moving ground and ended up pulling Damian down on top of him.

Oh. He understood now. With Damian pressed up against him more fully, the stuffed elephant squished between them, nothing could have enticed him to let go. He wrapped his arms more securely around Damian.

Danny sighed and dug his fingers into Damian's shirt. "We should call the others. Let them know to stay away for a bit." And then he remembered how much his brother hated him. "Or, I suppose, come sooner."

"What do you mean?"

"I know you don't like having me around. I can't imagine being forced to cuddle me is pleasant for you. If the others get here, you could go to Bruce or Dick."

"I do not like touch regardless of who it is. Dr. Isley's pollen is one of my least favorite toxins to be affected by, though it causes the least amount of damage. But you... are not the worst to be here with."

Danny watched as vines destroyed more and more of the carnival around them. After a while, he said, "High praise from the Demon Heir. Then why do you leave whenever I walk in a room?"

"I killed you. I did not think you would wish me around."

Danny's mouth fell open but it was only a moment before he was laughing so hard he had to stop breathing. He clutched Damian tighter and buried his face in his brother's neck as laughter shook his shoulders. His lungs would be screaming if he were still alive.

Damian tensed in his arms and pulled an arm away from Danny to fumble for something in his pocket. The cold rushed in which allowed Danny to finally draw in some air as he pushed closer to Damian.

"Richard! Yes, we're caught in the attack. Dr. Isley is using her ridiculous pollen. But, I think there might be something else in it, Danny is laughing as if he's been hit by Joker Venom. I feel no such affects as of now and we were dosed at the same time."

"No, no," Danny gasped out. "Not venom. You just— You think I'd be mad over a little murder?" Danny couldn't help but fall back into his laughter.

"You're... not?"

Danny shook his head into Damian's neck. "No, 'course not. What's a little murder between family? 'Sides, you didn't have a choice. I'm dating my second murderer, you know. She didn't have a choice either and the nightmares still keep her up some nights. And if you hadn't killed me that first time, resulting in Talia reviving me with the pits, I never would've survived my second and third deaths. Though... technically due to reasons, the second death never really happened which is why Sam had to kill me the third time. She knew I'd come back."

Dick's voice came through over the phone speaker, clear enough for Danny to hear it with how close he was. "What do you mean you've died three times!"

"I wish to know as well."

Danny shrugged. "Damian killed me when we were eight. I died in an accident at fourteen. That death was undone by a genie a few months later and my girlfriend had to recreate the accident to keep the town from being destroyed. It is what it is."

Dick's voice was horrified. "You can't just 'it is what it is' your own death!"

Danny chuckled. "I grew up in an assassin cult and now I have cool ghost powers. I think I'm more than justified in having a unique view on death. Mine just... doesn't bother me anymore. Though I don't really care for electricity. I can be around it, don't get me wrong, but I don't like it."

"Ghost powers?" asked Damian.

"Yeah. Wanna see? I can get us out of here. Where can you meet us, Dick?"

"Why have you not revealed these powers before now."

Danny shrugged again. "I had to keep them a secret from my adoptive parents because they were ghost hunters. Just got in the habit. Then you were acting so stand-offish I didn't know if you'd want me to open up. But if it was just misplaced guilt? Showing off might help you get over that."

"I have a secret I've been keeping from you as well. I wasn't sure if I was allowed to share it, but I shall once we get home, whatever Father thinks."

Dick broke in then, "Baby Bat, are you sure about this?"

"I am."

"Okay, well then, Alfred and I are about a half mile south of the south parking lot. Are you sure you can get here?"

Danny scoffed. "Easy." He reached over and hung up Damian's phone for him. "Ready for the ride of you life, Dami?"

"You do not know a fraction of what I have done over the last eight years. That is a high bar."

"And you don't know a fraction of what I've done, either. I bet I can cross that bar."

Damian hesitated. "What do you bet?"

That response brought Danny up short and then he was laughing again. "Okay, I like this version of you. I bet my share of dessert for the next three nights."

"I find those terms acceptable."

"Great." Danny moved his head from Damian's neck to look around. Poison Ivy was facing away from them and most of the people around them were similarly cuddled together and keeping their heads down. No one was around to see them.

Danny let invisibility wash over them both before raising into the air. He kept them tangible, however. He didn't think the pollen would've let him turn intangible if he'd tried.

"We are flying."

Danny grinned. "Yep. This is my favorite thing about being dead. Flight. Now, let's go find your other brother." From the air, he could see the batmobile pull up to the scene and Batman, Red Robin, and Signal rushed out. They were wearing modified costumes that covered all skin and came with respirators.

"Looks like the cavalry's here," Danny commented as he flew in the opposite direction.

"Indeed. Let us hurry to Richard and Pennyworth." After a moment, he added, "How does your flight work? It is like I cannot feel the pull of gravity at all."

"That's exactly it. I'm part ghost. That means that I'm part interdimensional being. Which means the physics to either dimension I belong to only affect me when I want them to. So for flight, I just decide that gravity doesn't affect me. I can go intangible and pass through objects as well because static and the repulsion of electrons doesn't have to affect me either, if I don't want it to." He couldn't help but show off with a few loops and barrel rolls.

"Hmm. Intriguing. May I request your assistance with some tasks I've been working on in the near future?"

"Course, brother-mine. Anything."

"How fast can you fly?"

"Fastest we've measured was over two hundred miles per hour, but it's been a while since we've checked. I only fly that fast when I'm intangible, though. Otherwise the air itself hurts. And don't get me started on what it's like to fly into a bug. Gross."

Below them, the jungle that had been the fairgrounds passed away, then the parking lot. Damian asked question after question about Danny's powers.

But Danny had barely started answering before he spotted Alfred and Dick and the car. He covered Damian's mouth with his hand, effectively silencing him.

"Wanna see if we can get one over on both of them?"

"Nothing phases Pennyworth."

"Which is why we have to try!"

"Very well, what do you have in mind?"

And so, Danny flew them down silently and invisibly until they were right in front of both Dick and Alfred.

Serendipitously, Dick was even asking, "How long do you think it'll take them to get here?"

So Danny dropped their invisibility. "About this long!"

Dick screamed and even Alfred's eyes widened slightly.

"I see, Master Danny," he said, "that does appear to be a useful skill."

"Holy sh—" Dick glanced over to Alfred and cut himself off. "How long have you been able to do that?"

"I told you," said Danny. "Since I died when I was fourteen. Been about two years now." He and Damian were still wrapped around each other with the stuffed elephant squished between them. "Damian has something for you, by the way. He won it and not even a rogue attack could make him drop it."

Damian reached between them and pulled out the elephant, shoving it in Dick's direction. "Here."

Dick was staring at them open mouthed but shook himself and took the toy. "Thanks, Baby Bat. I love it."

As soon as his hand was empty, Damian wrapped his arm back around Danny. "Now, let us get home. I despise dealing with this particular pollen of Dr. Isley's and wish to suffer the rest of the duration in private private."

"How long do the effects usually last anyway?" asked Danny.

"A few hours, I'm afraid," said Dick. "Why don't the two of you take the back seat. We'll get you both home as soon as possible."

"Great! Dami and I have a ton to catch up on now that he knows my secret."

"And I must inform you of my own secrets."

Dick opened the door to the back seat and Danny floated them both inside the car so they were lying down on the back seat.

Alfred eyed them, "Will the effects of the pollen allow you both to sit up and buckle in?"

"Nope!" Danny grinned at him. "But I should be able to keep us in place if needed."

"I see. Very well then, I shall trust you Master Danny. But if it turns out you've lied to me, I shall be most displeased."

Dick shook his head and sighed. "Lets just get you both home and wrapped up with something hot to drink and good snacks."

"Richard," said Damian before Dick could shut the door.

"Yeah, Damian?"

"I do believe... Danny and I shall have no trouble getting along going forward."

Dick gave them a blinding smile. "Glad to hear it, Baby Bat."

"If that is all, let us be on our way," said Alfred.

Danny smiled into his brother's neck. "Love you, Dami. I've missed you."

"I am also relieved at the lack of distance between us."

Something inside Danny relaxed at the open acceptance of his brother. Maybe he could build a new home here more long term. Gotham wasn't so bad at the end of the day.

-----

Okay... So not quite drugged confessions, but kinda? They wouldn't have had these conversations if it weren't for the pollen! But I feel like it's more misunderstandings and secrets reveal than anything else. And got way longer than I planned on. Hope you enjoy and let me know what you think!

[redbleedingrose]

i think eris collects fancy wine and lucien has a lot of old maps what do u think

Oh, I have been waiting all DAY for someone to send me an ask about my favorite Vanserra bro’s! I am so excited tehehhe!!

Hobbies for the Vanserra Bro’s

Eris Vanserra

Okay, starting with the love of my LIFE!!!

He is a master of all trades tbh. He has so many hobbies, especially once Beron goes bye bye LMAO. He has so much more free time, he was already practically running the Autumn Court, even when Beron was alive. But now, without the added stress of his father, he is trying to explore all different avenues for hobbies, especially when you can join him.

He absolutely collects fancy wines. I think Er is a collector in general. He likes collecting wines that you both can share after a long day of hard work, he likes to collect unique and rare editions of his favorite books that he can display in the library he built for you, he likes collecting rocks and geodes and seashells that he will use as decorations in Marwa and Twila’s nursery. When they are born, Eris becomes a collector of all things for his favorite babes. He collects dresses and jewelry that they will use when they are older, he loves collecting shoes and handbags for them. Eventually, a new wing to your home is added just so he can store all of things he has collected over the years for them that they have unlimited access to. I also think Er would collect children’s stories and books for them, he loves encouraging them to learn and grow into smart, young ladies. He absolutely expands the library for them, creating a little play space for them along with hundreds, if not thousands of books that all belong to them.

I also think Eris would become involved with creating DV shelters. He would absolutely love being involved in foundations and charities that specialize in helping women get away from their ab*sers, and building a new life for themselves. He has created a whole new job sector for these women, and often finds himself visiting these shelters so that he can help the older ladies running the home cook and clean. You can picture him in his apron, scrubbing away at the tile with furrowed brows trying to get the grout out. He would also bring his pups to the shelters so that they can play with the ladies and the children.

While Beron was alive, he did have a secret hobby that only you know of. One that you and him will take to the grave. One that was the reason for your first oathe to him, the reason that you have a tattoo that matches his on your left forearm.

Tehe.

You know those smutty books that Nesta reads?

Yeah…… He ghost wrote those.

Don’t ask questions, but he did.

The poor male had to express himself and his desire for you somehow.

Anyway, only you and him know that he is Prythian’s best selling romance author. And thats the way its going to stay.

That secret follows you both to the grave.

Oh and Eris is for sure an animals rights activist. He loves his horses and his pups so much, even though he will never admit it, but he has spent a lot of time creating laws that provide protections for endangered species and animal rights in general. He has limited hunting grounds in Autumn Court to allow for safe areas for animas to roam and exist freely. He absolutely tries to convince you to move onto a farm with him. He wants so many animals on that farm, he wants pigs and goats, dogs and cats, horses and cows. He also really loves the idea of having chickens.

One day you will give in from his incessant begging.

Not today, but one day.

Lucien Vanserra

Lucien is also a collector, just like his older brother. He absolutely collects old maps. He also collects coins that he finds on the ground, claiming they are lucky, and he also collects stamps from different courts, using them to depict his travels and act as an homage to his journey through life that lead to finding you. I think Loosh also collects art and pottery, and I know he himself, has dipped into the talent of pottery as a hobby. Even if all of his vases are a little crooked and his mugs are kinda cracked and a janky orange color.

He tries his very best, and thats all that matters to you.

So you will absolutely display his crooked vases in your home, and use his janky orange mugs, even if he glares at you while your coffee leaks in dribbles onto the floor and you smirk at him over the rim of the mug and you wiggle your eyebrows as you “cheers” him. Because you are a loving, good mate who displays your mates talent of course.

Even if it is just to make fun of him

But I also think he is a nature freak. He loves cultivating and collecting rare herbs and plants that he can grow in Day Court. He loves using those herbs and plants to create herbal remedies. He is a big naturalist. I think before you accepted him as your mate, he spent a lot of time in the Day Court libraries trying to get his mind off of you and he did that by studying old medicine. He studied different healing techniques and herbs that he could use to create medicinal potions. Over time, it grew into collecting these herbs and creating these potions for those who are sick, especially the elderly where he ended up donating a lot of his creations.

He also loves going fishing, he could spend hours in the ocean or in a lake or river swimming and fishing. He always releases them back into the wild, but I think there is something he finds peaceful about being in nature and being able to use nature in different ways. He loves going on hikes with you, and he absolutely is a camping nerd. His first holiday with you included going no-contact with every other person he knows for a week and spending that week in nature with you. He taught you different ways to find fresh water, and he would catch fish and cook them for you over the fire he stoked. At some point, he became really really good at cooking outdoors and was creating meals that are almost impossible for the most experienced chefs to make out door using nature.

Anyway, it was fun, and while it may not be your cup of tea for every vacation you take, you will go with him on this camping trip at least once a year to get away from society and spend time with your favorite male.

But!!! This does spark an idea for Lucien.

He loves to take young children out into nature to teach them about it, teaching them how to fish and how to survive in the outdoors just for fun. So he creates a little group of 5-10 year old children similar to Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts, encouraging all children to join him as he takes them out into nature. He teaches them how to swim, and how to tie sailors knots, and how to safely make s’mores. The children of Day Court look forward to it all year, excited to spend one on one time with their high lord who teaches them so many things, who is so kind to them, who is so funny and cool to hang out with. Story time in front of a campfire slaps for those kids. Eventually, when your children grow of age, he brings them with him, giving you a whole week for yourself to rejuvenate and vacation in peace.

With that being said, Lucien does take action similar to his brother. He creates national parks and conservation areas to protect nature. It is something that he finds incredibly important and he knows that one day, his children and grandchildren, and future generations as well, will appreciate his efforts to protect the world. He goes as far as convincing other courts to join his efforts as well, expanding protected areas.

Masterlist

[lloydfrontera]

still thinking of that au way back when and i just picture it being like:

webtoon javier, who hasn't yet realized webnovel lloyd isn't webtoon lloyd feeling sick: you don't have to try so hard you know. i already checked the connection between your soul and your body- webnovel lloyd, who is Convinced his cover is perfect: wHAT

meanwhile:

webnovel javier, in a hushed conference w webtoon lloyd: obviously i'm waiting for master lloyd to tell me himself!! webtoon lloyd, twisting his pinky in his ear as if to clean his ears out from that bs: yeah well. that is never gonna happen sorry. ever. *remembers how he almost had a heart attack overhearing his javier's convo w julian*

about this

wt!javier not having a single subtle bone in his body when it comes to lloyd is so funny to me, like this is the guy who decided he didn't care to pretend to not know lloyd is acting weird, of course he would immediately confront wn!lloyd when he starts acting strange but still be too oblivious to realize this is not his lloyd lmao

and wn!lloyd realizing that oh javier is way more attentive than he gave him credit for and if this javier has noticed something going on when he just switched places with a different version of himself then his own javier definitely has picked up on the difference between him and og!lloyd and that,,,, that is something he's not dealing with right now he's busy he can have a panic attack later he's fine everything is Fine.

also i'm so curious about how wn!javier and wc!lloyd ended up talking about the topic because there is. no way. wn!javier brought up the topic first. he's the king of pretending he doesn't notice the weird thing happening in the background no see he was distracted by the shiny yeah totally for sure. so if anything it had to have been wc!lloyd that took the first step, probably thinking these versions of them had the same arrangement as he and javier did and that it may be very well be worth the risk of losing the plausible deniability they'd worked so hard to keep between them if it meant getting back home faster.

ajdkadjkas he probably tried to be subtle first, just speaking around it, hoping javier would get the hint and they could start working together without having to really acknowledge it, only to get immediately frustrated by how obtuse wn!javier was being, doesn't he know how this works, why is he being so difficult it almost seems like he's deliberately ignoring the signs lloyd is trying to give,,,, oh. Oh.

cue wc!dropping the facade and being as blunt as possible, just shy of grabbing him by the face and telling him "hey i'm not your lloyd so if you can't stop being stupid on purpose and help me get home asap that would be great" lmao

also!!! wn!javier getting the chance to talk about The Topic with lloyd, even if it's not his,,,,, he's such a curious baby he would ask all sorts of questions about him and where he came from, cause he finally has the chance to speak about it but i don't think wc!lloyd would give him much tbh. he can see the Mess that's brewing between this version of them and he has no desire of dipping his spoon on that particular pot aksjdkafd

[gabessquishytum]

help i love that kind of domestic control kink. if i may present a slightly different version: dream banishes all hob's shaving stuff but hob explains that he actually does need to shave his face (because i feel like going from clean shaven to beardy is an important part of hob's whole "pretending he actually ages" routine). and dream accepts the reasoning but also, that doesn't mean he's letting hob have shaving implements again. so, you know. nothing to do about it. guess dream will just have to come by every morning to shave hob's face!

but in exchange for dream being so accommodating when he'd really rather hob not shave at all, he does also banish hob's wardrobe. so hob wakes up every morning to dream laying out his outfit for the day, and it's not like he'd be inclined to disobey and put on different clothes but it turns out he's... really into the fact that he couldn't if he wanted to. the clothes dream picks out for him are the only ones in his flat, so it's them or nothing.

and because dream's a very sweet master, even if he pretends he isn't, he'll leave a change of clothes waiting for hob when he gets home in the evening. if he's had a long day and he just needs to relax, he'll have the softest, most comfortable pajamas waiting for him. if he's spent the day thinking about dream and he's gotten himself worked up and needy, though? as long as dream knows he'll have time to come attend to his pet, he'll leave some cute lingerie and a nice plug for hob to wear for the evening until dream can get away from his own work.

-🐈‍⬛

H e l p I love this a lot. I’m really just gonna plunge myself into this whole scenario tonight, sorry I don’t make the rules over my horniness.

Hob is just. Confused and horny and having a small mental breakdown about all of this??? About the fact that Dream would willingly take time out of his day to shave him every fucking morning?? Hob’s brain does not compute. He has a little private cry about how loved he feels when Dream cradles his jaw and oh so carefully shaves him with the deadliest straight razor imaginable. Some days when Hob is having a bad time Dream will actually take over washing him entirely, guiding him gently into the shower or running him the best imaginable bath.

Dream catches on to how much Hob loves it and actually needs it. To be loved and cared for and babied, just a bit. So he removes an aspect of choice from Hob’s life, and Hob just. Falls face first into the routine. (He also gets really nice clothes bc Dream is a dramatic fashionista who WILL dress his boyfriend in designer clothes if possible). The outfit is always perfect, because Dream knows exactly what Hob needs for the day ahead. It’s that simple. Everyone at work is wondering where the hell Professor Gadling got a sense of style from until he shows up to a faculty event on Dream’s arm, looking at him like he hung the moon… and they’re all like oooohhhh. That’s His Husband (tm). This makes so much sense now.

This does also mean that there are times when Hob is having a relaxing day at home, and Dream leaves nothing for him to wear except a leather collar and some ruby-red sheer panties. Or in some memorable cases, absolutely nothing at all. And sometimes there are gifts, like an expensive watch or an inflating dildo. Every day is a surprise. There are also rules for Hob to follow (a lot of them involve working on his self esteem and going to bed at a reasonable time). Sometimes there are punishments. But no matter what, every day without fail, Dream shaves his face in the morning.

I just really need Dream to be Hob’s glorified sugar daddy tbh.

[spookyfestlove]

Life on Dathomir

Trigger Warnings! ⚠️ 18+ content

This probably doesn't even cover everything tbh...Possession, submissive, Gor, gore, aggression, D/s, B.D.S.M., marks/bruises, physical violence, M/s, use of the word slave, pain, master-bation, violence

Being in servitude for mother Talizan wasn't horrible. The Nightsisters were more or less considerate twords a twi'lek slave such as myself. The power dynamic was there but never cruel. But then there was that night...

Savage Opress returned home, successfully completing his mission of finding his brother. However Mother Talzins son was not the same. She dismissed me for the night, saying I am not worthy to be present for such a powerful and ancient Magick. I fell asleep to the sounds of the worst tournamented screams I had ever heard.

That morning Mother told me to attend to our guest. I collected herbs and oils in my basket, ones native to Dathomir to help the user to adapt to the planets dry climate.

I boiled some hot water and poured it into a wooden bowl, laying the fresh pressed towels on top to trap the heat. I stacked my basket on top and balanced it all on my head. I traveled in traditional slave fashion, gracefully and with purpose.

I knocked on the door, the room looked like an unlocked prison cell. No light or warmth. The air was cold and dark. I pushed in and placed the bowl at the side of his bed roll. I assumed a traditional slave pose and waited for him to call me.

I held the position for only about 15 minutes, a considerate length of time. This says to me that the man is merciful. However his willingness to wait says patience and traditional. I find these traits attractive in a master.

He gestured to me to crawl closer to his bed, using traditional hand gestures of a Master. I did so eagerly. I felt his hand trace down my face and around me neck. He snarled, irritated I woke him but pleased to see me so he could freshen up. "What have you for pain?" I loosened in his grip, presenting myself as submissive as possible. Dathomir males are known to be easily provoked both in temper and in arousal. He let go of me, dismissing me to collect my items and get started. I cleaned him first, starting from his horns and working down to the ends of his prosthetics. Pressing and massaging the warm water with the towels into his skin. I presented him a fresh towel to clean his face and waited for the command. He finished and tossed the used towel in the bowl. I slave bowed and proceeded to clean his manhood, refraining from eye contact as is protocol. Master Maul did not touch me, he simply groaned to signal to me he was done. I bent down to mop up any spilled water and set the dirtied towels back in the once warm bowl.

I poured some pain releaving oil in my hands and began to work my way down his body, starting at the base of his neck. I climbed behind him on the bed to get proper leverage, working the oils into his skin. His tattoos looked fresh and clean under the shine. 'Permission to speak Master?' "Yes." 'This oil may make you a tad drowsy sir.' "Hm."

I finished my lather and used the dirty cold towels to clean my hands and arms. I began to collect my items 'Permission to speak Master?' "Speak freely when we are alone" 'is there anything else I can do for you sir?'

I collected the last of my things and stacked them at the door. I slave kneeled at his feet, looking at the floor. After a long pause he remarks "that will be all."

'Thank you sir.' I slipped out as quietly as possible and continued my regular chores. My mind occasionally drawing back to the reborn son of Dathomir.

[sundere1181]

unraveled au master post because I'm bored and I don't want to do school (also known as me info dumping about my silly little separated turtles for an ungodly amount of time)

After Draxum’s lab exploded, Splinter grabbed the turtles, just like in the show, but he dropped Raph on the outskirts of the Hidden City, who ended up being found by Malicious Mickey and raised by the Mud Dogs. Splinter gets to the surface and places the three remaining turtles in a box and goes to find food but gets recaptured by Big Mama. (wandered a little close to the lion's den [her hotel]) Mikey and Leo escape the box and wander off, (Donnie is asleep so he doesn't follow them) being found by Tim Dunkman, (the crazy basketball billionaire from the Air Turtle episode) who sells Mikey to Jessica Jacyln (the referee from the wrestling episode) and keeps Leo for himself. Eventually Alex Noe (The dentist from the todd scouts episode) finds Donnie alone in a box crying his tiny little heart out and brings him home to raise him.

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Personalities:

Leo was raised with little worth other than publicity and as a money maker, which had Leo end up as not only a rich kid, but an insecure people pleasing anxious rich kid who hides behind money, ego, and his stupid fucking sunglasses. he's (and Mikey, tbh) big with always trying to keep his image up, so he doesn't get mauled by media. This means that while Raph and Donnie are totally okay with breaking the law on the surface (No consequences, Donnie lives in the woods and Raph lives in the hidden city), Leo is strongly against it.

Raph was raised as a ruthless criminal, but he still has his morals and high empathy. He won't rob orphanages or schools with his dads and likely tried to adopt stray animals a lot (didn't really work out most of the time) He's the only one who really remembers his brothers, but it's a really faint memory, more like "I feel like there's other things like me out there" then "I have brothers." He's constantly on the lookout for other turtles (And used to attend the battle nexus regularly, but the feeling of recognition he got from looking at the rat-man champion freaked him out and he stopped)

Donnie is like, actually insane with the dentists. He really embraced his evil scientist side growing up, but more evil dentist. A lot of experiments and accidents with his teeth happened when he was younger, and now his teeth are all fucked up and weird, so he wears a facemask 24/7 to hide it. He's my insane little blorbo, on instinct he checks everyone's mouth the SECOND he meets them and has absolutely zero qualms about just stickin his hands in there (He always has clean three fingered gloves and hand sanitizer handy). He also has no qualms about anesthetizing and kidnapping anyone he meets that has unique teeth. (This is how he meets Raph for the first time)

Mikey is similar to Leo in a lot of ways, except since he's the huge champion of Jessica's ring, he relies more on his fighting/wrestling skills. It's basically what he's built his whole personality on. he will attack anyone on sight if they give the slightest sign of attacking. (this is how him and Donnie's first meeting goes)

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Since I thought it was kind of an impossible coincidence that all the turtles in this au would get the same Renaissance names, I gave them all different ones and tbh I think this coincidence is funnier.

Leo: Tim literally just named him after the basketball team. His given name is Viper. He nicknamed himself Leo and likes it better and usually introduces himself as it with certain new people, but his billboards and media and other shit call him Viper. (Including Tim)

Mikey: Given name is Micheal, but stage/wrestling name is Divino and he’s so attached to it that he just introduces himself as Divino most of the time. 

Raph: Given name is Ruthless Raphael, and when he meets Donnie and tells him that Donnie’s like “Well that's way too long what If I just call you Raph” and Raph’s like “But :(((( The ruthless part :((((“ and donnie’s like “Okay compromise what if I call you Raph and it sounds the same but if you spell it out it’s RRaph with two r’s” and then RRaph’s cool with it

Donnie: Only one where his actual given name is Donatello, but he has a lot more titles. Since dentists are technically doctors he calls himself “Dr Donnie” (Even though he’s 1. Two young for any kind of certificate or doctorate 2. Wouldn’t be able to get one anyway (turtle) but it doesn’t really matter the whole dentist gang is super illegal anyway no one really cares) and he has a whole rehearsed introduction that he says every time he meets someone that goes kind of like “My name is Donatello, Dr Donnie, or Dentitello, but you can just call me Donnie” or something stupid like that. And the first time he meets Leo Leo interrupts him in the middle of it and Donnie is REALLY offended. (Dentitello is a nickname given to him by his little nephew)(I could ramble about his nephew and the relations between everyone in the dentist gang[although its more like a coven] but this is not the place)

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Designs (Because I can't draw very well yet and I'm much better at describing things anyway):

Leo: Literally just a mini Dunkman (same sunglasses/gold rings n shit). He wears a similar outfit that he does in the Air Turtle episode but with a letterman jacket over it and without those stupid ugly ass fucking goggles.

RRaph: He has wrappings on his hands like HG and a red jacket like LL. He has a red bandana, but it’s tattered and dirty because 1. It was a gift from MM and he hardly ever takes it off and 2. It was ripped from an old t-shirt so it looks a little wonky and you can see some of the seams and the faded design that used to be on it. He wears it around his neck like a scarf, and has a red hat like Danny has on his head. He has a bunch of scars all over his arms and. Well. everywhere tbh (he lives on the streets with some of the most notorious criminals in the hidden city he’s gotta have gotten hurt multiple times) He also probably has parts of his shell broken or chipped off. Overall just very battle worn but he’s still a softie even though he won’t hesitate to kill you (As long as you’re not a child and have done something worth being killed) <3

Mikey: He really leans into the wrestler persona, to the point he wears his costume almost 24/7. His mask and gloves look a little something like these:

Except yk. a little more high quality and fitted to his unique turble body. (the gloves being more orange). He probably puts a bunch of gold and orange stickers on his shell and plastron to match the theme.

Donnie: His battle shell and all of his weapons are tooth/mouth themed. He got way into SFX makeup at one point when he was a kid and his magnum opus project he made while in that stage was his main battle shell that he wears around the dentists. he designed it basically to look like teeth are just growing out of his back while also giving significant protection. He has others but they're mostly plain purple or white. His goggles are more the same that they are in canon except less crooked and whiter.

I think that's it for now. i might add to this (Thank god Tumblr posts are editable)

Thank you for reading :)

[silver-tooth-the-panther]

Hi there :) Lovely page💕 Could you please write some Tanjiro x Zenitsu comfort vore from your AU where Tanjiro is half-demon? They are so cute! Love them! ✌️

(Sorry it took a bit to get to your request. I had a bunch on my plate these last few days. Tbh, you have no idea how much I enjoyed writing this! I’m honestly so happy that someone requested something for my AU! Anyways, here’s your fic and I hope you enjoy it!)

For anyone who doesn’t know the AU, the master post is here

When The Emotional Support Needs Comfort

(A Half-Demon! Tanjiro x Zenitsu Fanfic)

Warning: This story contains soft vore and a bunch of fluff

It had been a long day for Zenitsu. His latest mission had separated him and his half demon boyfriend, Tanjiro. To the blonde, Tanjiro was his emotional support and the source of his courage, so not having his company on a mission was dreadful.

Luckily his mission wasn’t all that difficult. Ever since Tanjiro became the demon king and a half demon, there haven’t been that many demon attacks due to them converting into beings like Tanjiro. However, they still had to deal with some nuisances that refused to convert. So they occasionally had to put up with them.

Zenitsu had been sent to deal with one of these nuisances. The demon was nothing compared to what he has dealt with before, but that didn’t stop him from panicking though. After dealing with the little devil, Zenitsu rushed as fast as he possibly could to get home.

It took roughly ten minutes to reach the house that they were assigned to stay in. It was quite a cozy place and it supplied everything they needed. The walls and floors were squeaky clean and each of them were given quite a bit of yen to spend on food.

“I wonder how they’re able to provide all of this.” The blonde thought as he walked through the brown, double doors. His sparrow sat on his shoulder, chirping happily. “Tanjiro~” Zenitsu sang. “Are you home?”

He heard a soft growl coming from the left hallway. Zenitsu spun himself around to see a set of glowing red eyes. “Hello, Zenitsu.” Tanjiro purred. “How was your mission?”

“It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was gonna be.” Zenitsu chuckled . “I still panicked though.” Tanjiro softly smiled and outstretched his arms. “Aww come here.”

Zenitsu almost leapt into his lover’s arms. “Tanjirooo, I missed you!” Zenitsu winced. Tanjiro chuckled and rested his head gently on Zenitsu’s. “I missed you too, dear.”

Zenitsu melted into the demon’s embrace. He listened to the soft sounds coming from Tanjiro’s chest. The demon’s kind and gentle heartbeat was always able to soothe Zenitsu. However, something was different. A sound of distress caught the blonde’s attention.

“Come on, darling.” Tanjiro let the blonde go and took him by the hand. “I bought us some rice balls on my way here.” The demon gently led Zenitsu into their bedroom. All the while, the blonde wondered what could Tanjiro possibly be hiding.

The demon hid his pain quite well. Zenitsu knew that Tanjiro would rather keep his problems to himself than worry his friends. The only way to make him take care of himself was to make him confront his problems and that was exactly what Zenitsu was going to do.

“They’re right over here.” Tanjiro approached the dimly lit nightstand and pulled out a small white box. “I’m not that hungry right now, so I’ll just eat mine later.” The demon sat on their futon and opened the little, white box.

Zenitsu gave him a small smile and picked up one of the treats. “Thank you.” He said softly. The warm rice ball sent a very special memory into the blonde’s mind. It reminded him of when they first met.

Zenitsu took a small piece of the top and gave it to his sparrow. “I bet you’re hungry too.” He said sweetly. The small bird took the piece, chirped with gratitude, and flew to its cage in the corner.

“How sweet.” Tanjiro purred as he crossed his legs. Zenitsu took a bite of the treat and sat in front of the demon. Tanjiro gently played with the blonde’s hair as he ate. Tanjiro’s silence was another indicator that something was wrong.

Once he was finished, Zenitsu cleared his throat. “Hey, Tanjiro.” Zenitsu asked, concern gripping his voice. “What’s wrong?” The demon tilted his head in confusion. “Well uh.. are you okay?”

Tanjiro seemed even more confused. “Of course I am. Why do you ask?” Zenitsu sighed. “Tanjiro, I know when you’re lying, so come on. Tell me what’s wrong.”

The demon chuckled while rubbing the back of his neck. “Heh, you got me.” Tanjiro sighed heavily. “Well on my mission, I had to save this poor girl from one of the more conservative demons” Zenitsu nodded, giving Tanjiro his full attention.

“And well.. when I finally killed him, she ran away screaming. She probably thought that we were fighting to eat her. I knew that she didn’t know who I was, but it still hurts. I don’t want anyone to fear me.”

This tugged at Zenitsu’s heart. He knew that Tanjiro would never hurt an innocent soul, even as a half demon. “I’m so sorry. I know you wouldn’t hurt anyone!”

Tanjiro gave him a soft smile. “Thank you, Zenitsu.” However, the demon returned to his thoughts. “To be honest, I’m still not sure if I can trust my demon side.”

Zenitsu’s mind scrambled to find a way to comfort him. It was pretty hard to do so, since the blonde was usually on the other end. “Maybe if..” Zenitsu mumbled.

“Hm? What’s wrong?” Tanjiro asked curiously. Zenitsu sighed, worried that his decision might fail. “Well I trust you, Tanjiro. If I didn’t, would I be willing to do this?” Much to the demon’s surprise, Zenitsu stuck his head and shoulders into Tanjiro’s maw.

The demon was taken aback by this gesture. Zenitsu was usually afraid to be eaten, but now he was willing to be devoured. The blonde gently relaxed in the demon’s maw. It was surprisingly warm and soft.

A sudden anxiousness came over the blonde. “I..I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have done that! It must be incredibly weird to you!” Zenitsu cried.

Strangely, he felt Tanjiro patting his back. Truth be told, the demon wasn’t weirded out at all. He knew that all Zenitsu was trying to do was comfort him. Tanjiro gently started to swallow the rest of the blonde’s body.

Zenitsu started to relax once more as he felt his body going deeper and deeper into his lover. “Thank you.” The blonde murmured as he entered the demon’s throat.

Tanjiro’s swallows were swift and gentle. He had to be careful not to let Zenitsu get scratched by his fangs. All he wanted to do was to hold Zenitsu close and enjoy his comfort.

The demon’s throat was warm and dark. Zenitsu could hear Tanjiro’s soothing sound a lot better here than outside. The blonde let his body be soothed by the soft sounds and warmth.

Tanjiro was quick to finish his comfort food. The weight of his lover had finally entered his belly and the sudden fullness almost overwhelmed him. Tanjiro gently held his bloated tummy close to him and purred, “Are you okay in there?”

The demon’s stomach felt like a warm and protective blanket to Zenitsu. He lavished in the warmth and gently cuddled up to the soft, plush walls. He could hear Tanjiro’s muffled voice from the outside. “Yeah, I’m okay!” Zenitsu replied. “Uh., sorry. I didn’t mean to weird you out.”

“You didn’t weird me out.” Tanjiro purred as he started rubbing his belly. “This is actually quite soothing. Thank you.” Zenitsu could feel his face turning red. “I-it’s no problem. This is actually pretty comfortable.”

Tanjiro smiled to himself. “I’m glad to hear that. We should probably get to bed soon. We both had a rough day.” Zenitsu gently rubbed the walls around him. “Yeah we probably should. Could we also do this another time?”

The demon chuckled, “Of course!” Tanjiro gently tucked himself into the futon and curled up protectively around his belly. “Thank you for comforting me. I love you, Zen.”

Zenitsu nuzzled into the soft walls. “You looked like you needed it.” He chuckled. “I love you too.” And with that both the demon and the blonde fell asleep in each other’s embrace.

[triviareads]

Are there any sugar daddy or sugar mama books?

You know, I've yet to come across a sugar mama romance (there have been a few books I've read where the hero had a sugar mama in the past but they... were never really framed as healthy relationships which I feel is kind of telling).

There are a lot of historical romances with wealthy heroes and not-so-wealthy heroines (and he'll inevitably buy stuff for her) but I can only think of two heroes who actually have sugar daddy vibes, and both of them unsurprisingly are Lisa Kleypas heroes. Secrets of a Summer Night's hero Simon Hunt is the og; he wants to make Annabelle his mistress and is fully like "tell me your price" and "you could do with a bit of spoiling", and backs it up by buying her really nice boots (the first pair of shoes in a long line of extravagant shoe purchases), and there's a very sugar daddy-esque scene where he buys her jewels and the second they're home, she all but pounces him to thank him. Marrying Winterborne's hero Rhys Winterborne has a similar energy where he thinks plying a gal with gifts is the best way to court her (and plying her with a piano or a greenhouse is the best way to get her to sleep with him which.... does work tbh), and Helen actually has to teach him to curb some of his more extravagant impulses.

Moving onto contemporary recs:

No Ordinary Love by Ann Christopher is similar to Marrying Winterborne in that the hero has only ever had transactional relationships before, so that's all he knows. So this man, Baptiste (he's French) hooks up with Samira ONCE and pays off 11k in credit card debt. She's understandably shocked and tries to make him take it back and as the story goes on, she teaches him that affection ≠ money.

So Sweet by Rebekah Weatherspoon: A classic modern sugar relationship; Kayla signs up for a sugar website but ends up hitting it off with the website owner/Internet billionaire Michael at a mixer and they begin a sugar relationship that morphs into something more pretty quickly. I also appreciate how it dealt with a pretty common misconception about the kind of person who has success attracting sugar daddies (skinny, white).

Skyscraper Cinderella series by K. Webster: Kind of a bonkers sugar relationship; Winston propositions Ash, the maid who's cleaning his office, and then financially incentivizes every sex act (and non-sexual acts) that Ash performs. There's a good amount of degradation involved. That being said, their relationship is actually really hot and pretty damn hysterical.

Highest Bidder by Sara Cate: Fairly run of the mill as far as sugar daddy/baby romances go, but it fits the bill; obscenely rich older man, financially unstable younger woman, he likes to be called daddy in bed, he takes her to Paris at some point.

The Master by Kresley Cole: So Cat is a substitute escort and it's supposed to be a one-night thing, except it isn't, and then he freaks out about her baby-trapping him and holds her as prisoner in his penthouse so she buys a lot of stuff on his card out of spite (or as she calls it "retaliatory consumerism"). That's the sugar aspect, but honestly the highlight is the prisoner bit.

Preferential Treatment by Heather Guerre: Mikhail offers Kate money to get her our of debt in exchange for domming him. There is also a huge financial domination component that takes a WILD turn when she has him donating money to Super PACs to (ironically) overturn Citizens United.

[tutyayilmazz]

yesterday was among the most eventful days of my life. i had the second interview at the Big Important company and it seems to be they really are interested in hiring me, they introduced me to the team, gave me a tour of the labs and gave examples of their work and i have zero desire about the mouse work but since this is such a huge, unique opportunity at such a prestigious company and i can't get no other interviews elsewhere I'll have to force myself to do it and it will be worth it for having started my career There. so that's all great news! then the journey back home was 4.5 hours and after i rested a bit the landlady that's staying with us now called us for a meeting and she talked for like a whole fucking hour. I'm a clean person myself but hers is an obsession level and even if it was just that it'd be manageable somehow but she's also taken issue with things I've said which, yeah, weren't very soft and sweet but not horribly rude and said that it's clear I'm not happy here and didn't fit with the friendly relationship she had with the other girl... like I've been living in a flatshare with whichever students were assigned for 2.5 years so of course i prefer just doing my own thing rather than being like a daughter she can say anything to!!!?! being told off at age 25 by someone who's not my mother feels very irksome honestly. i was planning on joining my friends who had started drinking before the erasmus party but i couldn't bc it got late by the time i could eat bc of this shit abd my whole mood was so ruined that i cried when i met with my friends at the party :') and at first it really felt like being in a zoo being sober while they had gotten so drunk that several couldn't even make it to the party 💀 the one guy in our group was so drunk he kept lifting me or another friend up so crazily my feet would be hitting people around us ajdgjshdjdj eventually i did get drunk enough without spending toooo much and danced so fucking much and stumbled to the floor so many times bc of said antics that my knees still hurt 💀🤪 it was an insane 5 hours tbh my bestie from this group is normally very calm and i was never expecting to ever see her acting so silly and that was so fun 🥳🥳 we've only known each other for 1.5 months but we've gotten pretty closer and she was hugging me so tight and yelling "i don't want you to go away" and i really don't think it's just the drunkenness talking 🥹🥰 she's also been here for her whole master studies so it's a shame we didn't meet earlier but I'm so glad we did and I've never been part of such a large group all getting along and it feels so nice and i want to fully enjoy my last few months here without this oppressive situation in the apartment

[e-b-reads]

tagged by @aeide-thea (thank you!)

favorite color I usually go with green, but of course it really varies depending on context (are we talking clothing? in nature? also just depends on mood tbh).

currently reading I've been reading a lot and quickly lately, so this is ever-changing, but as of this typing I am 1) still somewhere in the beginning/middle of Master and Commander, by Patrick O'Brian, which I am pausing on to read various quick reads, so I am also 2) more than halfway through Body in the Bayou, by Ellen Byron, second in a cozy mystery series set in New Orleans, the first of which I said some things about here.

last song depending on how you count this, it was either "Rock Me," by Tommy Dorsey, played by a band from New Orleans whose YouTube videos I've been watching a lot of, or "No One is Alone," from the Into the Woods CD I checked out of the library (listened to while driving home from class yesterday). (Unfortunately it's specifically the movie soundtrack, not a Broadway cast, but it's still pretty good.)

last tv show hmm, I don't have any streaming services so I don't watch much TV. (Actually, the causality might go the other way there.) But! I do pay about 5 bucks a month to my local PBS station so I can watch some of their shows on my computer. Currently working on an episode of a Mary Berry cooking show. Very soothing.

last movie This I really don't know. I've always mostly watched movies as a communal activity, and I started living alone right before the pandemic, so there haven't been many chances for community. Maybe Steel Magnolias several months ago, when I visited a friend and we watched it together.

sweet/savory/spicy Must I choose one? I like spice but don't have a super high tolerance, so I could do without spicy. Otherwise I will not choose. I like something savory then something sweet.

currently working on A small selection: an annotated bibliography for the professor I'm now doing research with/for; getting all the boats winterized; and my most recently worked-on writing project is a mystery novel, sequel to another mystery novel I wrote, which I would love to clean up and try to publish someday, but between PhD and full-time job, it will have to wait a little longer!

tagging with only-if-you-want-to caveats: Perhaps @wearethekat @dracereads and/or @therefugeofbooks might be interested? (I'm pretty sure I've seen this go around elsewhere, and you definitely don't have to write as much as myself or my tagger! Tho I will read it all if you do.) And if anyone else would like to, feel free to claim this as your tag as well!

[visceravalentines]

Sinclair Household HCs

My brain...it’s rotting....  

COOKING

Vincent cannot cook for shit.  Not only that, but he puts milk in his bowl before he pours in the cereal.  Unforgivable.  Vinny does like to bake, but his success rate is wildly variable.  Sometimes his cookies are weapons.  

Vinny gets so wrapped up in his work he forgets to eat for hours.  Bo will sometimes call him from the station to tell him to go upstairs and eat something. He genuinely likes fruits and vegetables, but he’s not picky and will munch just about anything.  

Bo is a survivalist cook. He spent some time parenting his brothers, particularly Lester, and Trudy liked to withhold food as punishment, so he became adept at throwing together something quick.  

Processed food is this man’s fuel.  Boxed mac & cheese, canned soup, frozen dinners.  Can toast a waffle.  Can grill a cheese.  Can make a pretty damn good sandwich.  Has been known to eat the pieces of a thing rather than assembling the thing.  

Lester is the chef! You can hand this man a dead skunk, like really dead, and he will present you with the most decadent burgoo you’ve ever had.  Also quite the connoisseur of wine.  He makes his own and it’s damn good.  

Lester has a garbage disposal stomach and appetite.  He’s never heard of food poisoning.  He’s never met a food he doesn’t like.  He’s a particular fan of gas station fare though, stopping on his route for chips, beef jerky, pork rinds, you name it.  

Spice tolerance?  Vin is the master.  Lester is Cajun through-and-through.  Bo will insist he is fine even though his face is red and he is pouring sweat.  To be fair, he’s got a tolerance above average, but he’s nothing compared to his little brothers.  

CLEANING

Lester, it’s Lester.  

The man doesn’t mind a little grime.  We’ve all seen his truck and his self.  But that’s work.  He’s got too much to do to worry about a little blood, especially when it spills as fast as he can clean it.  When it comes to his living space, having things neat and orderly is like a mental separation for him between work and home.  

Makes his bed every goddamn day (when he sleeps in a bed, that is).

Lester takes showers until the hot water runs out and revels in that squeaky clean, guts-less feeling. If you catch him outside the workweek, mans smells delicious, kind of tobacco-y and leathery and woodsy.  He does love him some chew, but he’s not gross about it.  

Unfortunately for him, his brothers are disasters.  

Vinny is the most single-minded person in the state of Louisiana.  The project in front of him is all he can see or think about.  He leaves tools everywhere.  He sets candles down, forgets about them, leaves them burning until someone blows them out before they light something on fire.  He genuinely does not see the mess (same tbh).  

His workshop looks like a bomb went off, but it all makes perfect sense to him.  He can find you anything in two seconds.  If you put it “where it goes,” he will never find it again.  

Vincent has wax lodged permanently beneath his fingernails and there’s always a microscopic film of it on his skin.  His hands are very soft from it though.  Sometimes he goes for a while without showering because art.  He also has a solid skincare routine pressed upon him by Mother Trudy.  Wax does not breathe, so he has to keep his face clean and moisturized.

The other thing he is meticulous about is his hair.  We never see it in the movie, but I like to think he keeps it pulled back a lot of the time while working.  He doesn’t mind it in his face, but getting wax out of it is a nightmare.  Lester isn’t often around to help him, and Bo told him if he ever made him do it again he’d shave his head.  Vinny smells generally like art supplies, kind of sweet and woody, but his hair smells like nice shampoo.  

Bo is the opposite of Lester.  He is neat at work and a slob at home.  His garage is always swept, every little screw and gear organized and accounted for, his truck washed once a week like clockwork.  At the house though, man’s leaving dishes in the same place for weeks, crumbs galore, dirty and clean laundry all over the floor.  

Every so often, the mess gets to him and he goes on a cleaning tirade.  It gets the work done, but he’s a nightmare to deal with if you get in his way.

Bo himself is pretty well-kept.  He wears clean underwear every day goddammit.  Despite being a mechanic, he hates having dirty nails, so he will give himself a manicure on Sundays.  Don’t you fucking dare look at him like that.  Smells like motor oil, leather, cigarettes, and that good sweat.  Only wears cologne on special occasions, like funerals.

 HOME LIFE, ESP. WEEKENDS

Bo is the one who makes runs into town for supplies.  Vincent would rather die than leave Ambrose, and Lester attracts too much attention between the smell, the slight lack of social skills, and his tendency to describe the innards of animals at the slightest provocation.  Bo attracts his own kind of attention, but he’s adept at deflecting it.  

Lester doesn’t often sleep at the house.  He has a bedroom, but he also has a neat little shack in the woods, and that’s where he spends most of the week.  It’s not that he doesn’t love his brothers; it’s that he likes his space, his freedom.

He comes home on the weekends, sometimes early on Fridays.  This is when most of the housekeeping gets done, but he doesn’t mind a bit.  

Friday night is boys’ night. Isn’t every night boys’ night? Yes.  Does this matter?  No.  

All three of them are wicked good at pool.  Like, stupid good.  Games between the brothers are either over fast, or last an hour.  There’s also a fair bit of poker.  The currency at stake takes the form of small bones (animal, human, whatever), nuts from the garage, matches, or loser shots.

Speaking of which, the Sinclairs can hold their booze.  In addition to his wine endeavors, Lester makes some facefucking moonshine and rotgut whisky.  The night usually starts with cheap beer and ends with Bo talking REALLY LOUD, LIKE SO LOUD. HE’S NOT YELLING, HE’S JUST LIKE THIS.

Vincent gets everyone water and stops drinking hours before the other two because he’s smart, although he can absolutely drink you under the table if given the chance.  Lester gets loopy and ends up falling asleep in uncomfortable positions.  

Bo doesn’t typically get belligerent, but it is a possibility.  He usually gets uncharacteristically sentimental.  He smiles a lot more.  Sometimes he gets real quiet.  When this happens, his brothers put on music or start telling stories about happy memories to keep him out of the dark places in his head.  

Saturday mornings are often bleak and silent affairs.  

In a longtime tradition, Saturdays are spent on yardwork.  There are a lot of yards in Ambrose, lots of planter boxes, and they all need to be kept presentable.  Picture all three Sinclairs mowing lawns with or without white t-shirts.  Yeah.  

Sunday is for putting the house back into a reasonable state of affairs.  The amount of laundry these men generate is abominable.  No one likes dusting, hence all the cobwebs.  

Attendance at Sunday dinners is non-negotiable.  Shirts tucked in, all three of them.  Bo and Vincent will often help Lester cook.  This is not, in fact, helpful.  None of the brothers are particularly religious anymore, but they alternate saying grace before they eat.  

When Monday morning comes, Bo always has coffee made before Lester leaves at the ass crack of dawn. It happens to be decent.  Lester takes a thermos for the road, Bo has a cup before he leaves the house, and he brings Vinny an insulated cup in his workshop, so that even when he forgets it’s there, it’s warm for him when he remembers.

[mehidktbh]

Hey, Just saw your requests are open and I have been waiting forever just so I could request this. I was wondering if you could do some showering headcanons for the Sinclair brothers.

Thanks so much and take your time with this <3

A/N: Oooo thank you so much, I loved this idea! Always wondered this tbh.

Warning 18+: NSFW/Smut, sexual activities and themes included and just showering in general

BO SINCLAIR:

- In my opinion, I believe Bo is hygienic and he probably takes a shower like normal. He probably takes a shower every 2-3 times a week or probably like every night. Maybe. I mean you can't tell me that this man does not have a routine and he always stinks, I mean he does love working on his car, having to run up and down the town and not to mention the loads of people that come through. He's working 24/7 and still has to keep up the good appearance for the people that come by, now that I think about it he definitely has one of those little carries around roll-on or spray deodorants. That he sprays every second of every day

- With Bo having to keep up with all of that he's definitely down to have a shower with you. If that means he can wash himself while staring at you the whole time, then he's sold. Bo can't wait to get into the shower with you, so much so that after he's done he is expecting you to do this every night.

- Bo also loves the thought of coming home after a big day of running around and charming the people that he's just melting at the thought of entering the door to the sound of the shower running upstairs. Or you waiting at the door for him so you'll get in with him, he'll always appreciate you waiting for him to get home.

- He'll love it if you would scratch his scalp and help massage his hair, he would never admit it through. For example, Bo would be just standing upright or leaning down a little, so you can get up to actually reach his hair. All while he's trying not to groan at how nice your hands feel against hair, you might hear him sometimes but how can he not when you are practically a master at it.

- Sometimes if Bo is in the mood he'll definitely turn the innocent shower mood into a dirty room full of your moans and the sound of skin slapping. While it's like a 50/50 per cent chance, he's more than happy to lift you up or bend you over, all while he takes this chance to be careful. Bo is pretty careful when he has sex with you in the shower, he's still his ruff self but always making sure your both upright.

- But sometimes after such an exhausting and humid day, all Bo wants to do is take a relaxing shower and then go snuggle up in bed. He's more than happy to stand there while you clean him up, to be honest, that's always been his dream. For someone to take care of him and clean him, all while you are more than happy to participate.

- Bo definitely owns those 3 in 1 or 2 in 1 bottles. I mean come on and you bet your ass it's those nature smelling ones or just some random scent he doesn't care about. He probably just picks one up off the shelf and calls it a day, he doesn't mind only if it does the job. Or maybe he picks one of those bottles that look like they were only made for men and that always has that once cheezy slogan with some ridiculous picture of a shirtless man on the front.

VINCENT SINCLAIR:

- Now Vincent is definitely a little weird when it comes to hygiene, he washes himself of course but not as much as a normal person would or Bo. He maybe does it 2 times a week maybe or once, depends how he's feeling after the day. And he definitely doesn't have such a consistent routine as Bo does. But with the consent work and having to do all the wax figures, he probably doesn't get around to washing himself properly. And if he does I bet he doesn't get everywhere or he probably jumps in for 5 minutes and gets out, maybe he'll wash his hair. Again probably not knowing how tangles it looks in the movie and he probably gets wax stuck in it all the time and probably the second he comes out and starts working on something.

- Vincent is truly grateful when you decide you want to shower with him after all he longs for it after every day. Vincent knows the second Bo closes the station and comes up to the house to call it a day Vincent can stop working, though he chooses not to a lot of times. He'll hear you running down the stairs and he straightenings his back and waits for your positive energy to pop out from around the corner.

- Vincent is 100% fine with you touching his hair, he's probably standing there and waiting for you to get the hint. He'll even bow his head down or lean down so you can reach his head. While he isn't as talkative when it comes to showing you that he loves the messages you give him, you can tell by the way his lips smirk and his eyes roll back. He's loving every second.

- Vincent always love it when you guys shower, it shows him that you're here to stay and that you're not going to judge him. While at first Vincent is very hesitant about showering with you or in front of you. He can't get over the fear of you seeing his body to face for a long period of time, maybe he'll come around quicker if he knows that he's shown his face to you before.

- Vincent loves that when he's showering with you he can relax at the thought that you're not going to judge him. Vincent can always relax when he's around you and when he's in the shower everything that was clogging up his mind before is now gone.

- Showers with Vincent aren't too dirty through Vincent definitely has thought about shower sex before. And to be honest, he's definitely drawn it, it's just hidden away somewhere in one of his sketching books. While most times Vincent is too shy to come out and say it or he doesn't know how to express it, he's mostly down if you're down. Vincent is 100% such a softie when it comes to sex in the shower, he's rather picking you up and having you mushes up against the wall. Or his feet are up against yours to make sure you're not falling over, or your feet are too wobbly to hold you up. Considering how good Vincent is, it's a possibility that man has made your feet shake and quiver under your own weight.

- Like Bo some days Vincent just isn't up to the idea of having sex so he's more than happy to take his moment to take over you giving him head messages. And instead, he'll return the favour to you, you just lean up against his body as his hands rub all around your head. Or your body, depending on which you like more.

- Vincent has like no bottles, I mean maybe one body soap but I doubt he has shampoo or conditioner. Maybe he'll give in and keep a few bottles in there if you nag him enough or buy your own and give it to him. Whatever you give him he's grateful and so excited to use it on you more than himself. Also, that man lives for different scents, I mean after being in such a hot and wax-filled room. He doesn't mind his hair or body smelling like flowers every now and again, considering he always knows when you are around with how much he loves your scent.

LESTER SINCLAIR:

- Hmm Lester is definitely difficult to figure out, while on one hand, he's probably bouncing up and down to get into the shower. And on the other hand, he's too tired to probably take a shower. I believe Lester maybe takes a shower every day but then again he definitely has skipped a day before. He has a routine probably, but it's not stable most of the time.

- Lester is surprised and flustered when you bring up the idea of taking a shower with him. While he certainly doesn't back down from the idea of taking a shower with him, he's just a little surprised.

- Lester always comes home covered from top to bottom with blood, he's exhausted and so hot. While mindlessly driving on the endless rocky roads and looking out for anything or anyone. He does this every day and knows the forest like the back of his hand, he knows every escape route, every corner and every town or place near.

- You can say, Lester comes home every night smelling worse than before or coved in blood from head to toe. He's longing for a shower or something to clean the blood off of him, he would hate to get any blood on you.

- Through when your finally in the shower Lester can be such a sweetheart, always cleaning you off or offering help. He's standing there and holding out a bottle for you or helping you wash those hard to reach areas, all while you try to hint to him that he needs to be cleaned too. Lester just loves to have his hands all over you.

- He is so grateful when you help him, even if it's something minor Lester always breaks into tears and says how he'll return the favour.

- Lester is freaking out when you bring up the idea of having sex in the shower, sure he doesn't mind but what are the odds that he's probably thought of having sex in the shower before. Like Vincent, Lester is so very careful of you and making sure that you're leaning against him or he's supporting you. His hands would be wrapped around your body as he thrusts in and out of you, gasping in your ear and telling you all these sweet things. His arms are supporting you more than his feet are, as he slowly kisses down your neck.

- Lester may even suggest waiting after the shower is done or instead, he'll turn it off right then and there. Lester may feel a little bit more comfortable after he knows you aren't going to slip over and instead Lester can have more time. Instead of it being kinda like a quickie whenever you guys get down to it in the shower.

- Lester owns separate bottles; one for shampoo, one for conditioner and one for body wash. There all the same brand or all the same scent, Lester lives for one brand and he'll stick with it. Or he'll like one scent and he'll just test out any brand. Unlike Bo, Lester definitely likes his bottles and he doesn't mind taking his time at the shops to see what they have. The scent may be nature or flowers, Lester can't resist.

[bellesowl]

kiss and make up

- multiple characters 

⤷ atsumu, sakusa

genre: (an attempt at) angst to fluff ; established relationship, timeskip 

synopsis: in which you have an almost relationship-ending argument

word count: 2.1k total - about 1k each

warnings: fighting (obv), being called a burden, the boys are kinda mean but they make up for it i swear

- a/n: tbh i was kinda getting sick of writing just fluff so i wanted to spice it up a lil! if this sucks i’m probably going to stick to fluff fics but i think it should be fine? this one also only has 2 characs cause idk how i would be at writing angst LMAO if this does well enough i’ll post the one i have written w kuroo and iwa <3 but i feel like this kinda sucks so oh well

- thank u @kybabi for beta-ing <3

- miya atsumu

you n atsumu have been together since high school which is why you’ve always been inseparable

you went to the same college & moved in together right after, but once he got his job with the jackals, he insisted that you didn’t work and focused on getting your master’s degree

you reluctantly agreed, if only to be able finish & earn your phd soon after

because atsumu is always busy, it’s kinda become commonplace for you to do the chores around the house- like doing the laundry or washing the dishes or cooking dinner for him

but it’s gotten to the point where he expects it

atsumu sighs, unlocking the door to your shared apartment. today’s practice was rough, it was a day of hard conditioning and bad sets and he wanted nothing more than a good meal and to cuddle. the first thing he noticed when he walked in was the mess. instant ramen bowls were scattered everywhere, empty coke cans and dirty napkins were all over the floor, and there you were, in the eye of the hurricane. the second thing he noticed was that there was no homecooked meal.

surprised, he walks into the dining room to see you, furiously typing away at your laptop with four different books surrounding you. you hear his footsteps and look up.

“hey baby! how was practice?” you ask with a smile

atsumu grunts in reply and gestures toward the kitchen, “so.. what’s for dinner babe?”

your eyes widen, “oh shoot! i’m sorry, i was so busy studying for this final that i forgot to cook. do you mind-“ you stop when you see him roll his eyes and head out.

“um, where are you going? you just got home?” you ask, following him.

“out. i have to get food somehow” he replies, “especially because my useless s/o can’t cook a goddamn meal for me” he mutters under his breath

you stop in shock because did he really just say that?

“i’m sorry, i don’t think i heard you right.” you start but he interrupts you

“i said, i have to go get food because someone is too busy to cook a goddamn meal. what do you even do anyways- well, besides spend my money? the least you can do is cook for me, god.” he finally turns to look at you but he feels his heart stop at the look on your face.

not wanting to escalate the situation any further, you try to calm him down, “tsum, hey, i’m sorry i forgot to cook okay? this is my last final before the year ends and i just can’t afford to fail it, so i’ve been studying all day. if you come back to the kitchen, i’ll make you something, okay?”

“i don’t want to eat your half assed attempt at a meal, y/n. the whole point is that you couldn’t get off your ass for an hour to cook when i make the money, i paid for the apartment, hell, i’m even paying for your school! is it really too much to ask for you to stop being such a burden and cook and clean everyday?” he fumed.

you gape at him, shocked that he would even say that. to hell with not escalating things

“at least i want to do something more with my life than hit balls around and retire at 35” you hiss, “and i do everything in this house! i do the laundry, i clean the bathroom, i cook - i do all the things you refuse to. and do i complain? no. i offered to get a job but you refused.”

you turn around to grab your laptop and your textbooks, “just- just do whatever the hell you want to, atsumu.” and with that you walk out the door.

atsumu’s heart drops when he realizes that you actually left. sure, you’ve had arguments here and there, but you’ve never left. he pulls out his phone to call you when he sees you’ve left yours on the counter. knowing there’s nothing to do but wait at this point, he begins to clean up and calls osamu over.

-

it’s already 3 am when you walk back into your apartment, and you blink multiple times when you open the door. it’s ... clean? you’re sure it was a mess when you left, so how would it be clean? you sigh, too tired to think about it more and walk into the kitchen. your eyes widen at the sight. not only is your favorite food on the stove, but there your boyfriend is, asleep on the dining table. you smile slightly, well that explains things.

“ ‘’mu, hey, wake up babe.” you kiss him lightly and shake him.

he grunts and sits up, “baby! i’m so so sorry for what i said. you are in no way, shape, or form a burden, i have no clue why i said that. today’s practice was just really tiring, but i know i shouldn’t have taken it out on you. just please-” he sighs, “just please don’t leave me again.”

your heart breaks your teary eyed boyfriend. “shh, of course baby. i’ll never leave you again okay?” you say, tugging on his arm, “cmon babe, let’s go to bed, okay?”

“mm okay my love.” he replies and practically pulls you into bed. “i love you, okay?”

“i love you too baby.” you reply

“to the moon and back?” he asks

“yeah, and to infinity and beyond.” you reply, your lack of sleep hitting you hard

“oh, i didn’t know i was dating buzz lightyear”

you let out a loud laugh and just like that you both fall into the same routine, love radiating off both of you in waves.

- sakusa kiyoomi

dating sakusa was,, challenging

it definitely took him a while to get comfortable with you

so you guys have been dating for a couple years now, and at this point he’s def clingy

however there still moments when he reverts to his old self

this just happened to be one of those times

“OUT! AND JUST LIKE THAT, EJP RAIJIN TAKES THE WIN AGAINST THE BLACK JACKALS!”

the stadium is silent before the ejp cheering section erupts in cheers. you stay silent, watching your team below. you watch as sakusa stills, still in disbelief. you make your way down, practically sprinting to your boyfriend.

he sees you on the sideline and makes his way over to you. you put on your biggest smile and attempt to make him feel better.

“you did great, kiyo! you’ll get them next time, yeah?” you beam, knowing how hard he’s been training to beat his cousin

he eyes you warily, not knowing what to say.

usually, sakusa gets pretty clingy after games, so you you move to give him a hug.

“don’t touch me” he barked, jerking away from you. “if you hadn’t been distracting me, we would’ve won.”

you stare at him, refusing to let the tears flow. you both turn when you hear a certain setter yelling at the opposing middle and you sigh.

“um, okay then. i’ll see you at home, yeah?” you ask

sakusa merely nods and makes his way over to his teammates. you look around to see if anyone saw what just happened and you lock eyes with your boyfriend’s cousin, who walks over.

“congrats on the win komori! you guys did so well!” you cheered

“thanks, y/n! and i’m sorry about kiyoomi. i’m sure you know he gets that way sometimes.” he explains

you smile and shake your head, saying that you’re used to it and you both bid your farewells. as you walk out of the stadium, you think back to how your boyfriend, the one person you loved with everything you had in you, utterly embarrassed you in front of his whole team. before you know it, silent tears start streaming down your face. 

you enter your home and immediately rush to the bathroom. you draw yourself a bath and make some dinner while waiting. you assume that kiyoomi wouldn’t be home to have dinner with you anyways- and now that you think about it, you can’t remember the last time you had dinner together. after you finish your bath and eat your dinner, you decide to wait up for boyfriend and watch a couple episodes of your favorite show to pass the time. 

-

kiyoomi walks into his apartment at around 1 am, completely and utterly exhausted. he kicks his shoes off and drops his bag on the floor. The rustling rouses you from sleep and you sit up.

“hey kiyo” you say with a yawn, “where’ve you been all night?” 

sakusa ignores you in favor of getting ready for bed and you frown when he brushes past you. 

“kiyo, babe, what’s wrong? you’ve been ignoring me all night and i-” you start but he interrupts you before you can finish. 

“god, just shut up, y/n. can’t you tell i don’t want to talk to you right now? i’ve already had the worst day, i don’t need you making it any worse.” he snaps

"kiyoomi, look, i understand you’re upset but you shouldn’t take it out on me.” you reason, reaching out towards him, “listen, i’m here if you wanna-” 

“i said, do not touch me.” he seethes. “you are so fucking clingy y/n, lord, let me breathe a little.”

with those words, you explode. “you know what, sakusa,” he flinches when he hears his last name come out of your mouth, “i think i have the right to want to spend some time with my boyfriend! i haven’t seen you in god knows how long- you leave before i wake up and i fall asleep in an empty bed. i’ve been working my ass off to get some time off to watch your stupid volleyball game and what do you do? you embarrass me in front of your whole team!”

you sigh, wiping away the tears that continue that continue to fall. “listen, i don’t want to fight right now. i’m going to go stay at a friend’s house for the night, alright? i’ll see you tomorrow” you say, grabbing your purse. “if you’re even home tomorrow,” you add under your breath.

sakusa is in shock. the moment he saw your tears start to spill, he felt an undeniable and unrelenting ache in his chest that only seemed to grow with every work that came out of your mouth. and when the door shut? sakusa fell on his knees, his heart dropping. he truly couldn’t believe he said that to you. now all he had to do was wait till you got home.

-

2:38 pm - you check the time on your phone before pulling out your keys. you hope you made the right move, choosing to come back home while kiyoomi was still at practice. you open the door and the sight causes your eyes to widen.

there, on the couch with your favorite flowers in hand, is your boyfriend. he hears the door open and stands up abruptly.

“y/n, my love, i am so sorry. i truly cannot express how horrible i feel, and i cannot begin to understand how you feel.” he takes a deep breath, seemingly holding back tears. “i- i do love you. i love you more than i’ve ever loved anyone in my entire life. i know i’m not the best at expressing it, but you mean the world to me- no, you are my world. without you, i don’t know what i would do. so please-” his voice cracks, “just, please give me another chance?”

you run towards your boyfriend, practically tackling him. “kiyo, baby, of course. i love you too, you know? you just can’t do that anymore, yeah? you shouldn’t feel like you have the right to embarrass me just because you had a bad day. and please, don’t call me clingy? i know i do stick to you like glue sometimes, but that’s just because i never see you anymore.” you reply.

“that will all change, darling.” he answers sincerely, “i’ll make more time for you, i swear. in fact, i’ll take the week off, how does that sound?” at the sight of your smile, he relaxes.

“that sounds wonderful, yoomi.” you answer

sakusa feels the weight that’s been dragging him down lift and he realizes the effect you have on him- you’re his breath of fresh air. he also realizes how utterly idiotic it was to push away the one person who could make him feel better.

it’s fine, he reasons, he’ll just never make that mistake again. he swears it.

[slytherinsnekxvii]

let's talk about lily evans and the marauders, aka moony, wormtail, padfoot and prongs. given that i didn't use their actual names, i think you can figure out where this is going. it's also long as hell, so. canon vs fanon, marauder edition, except snek is sleep deprived.

now, before we begin, i don't dislike the marauders. or lily, tbh. if I'm being perfectly, genuinely honest, i still go back and forth sometimes but they've been growing on me for a while now. the canon versions, at least. fanon does them real dirty, and that's part of why i'm writing this, because i'm genuinely tired of it. it's an injustice.

you can at least make excuses for james and lily, who were so undeveloped that jkr practically dropped a fill-in-the-blank sheet of character information in our laps, but sirius, remus and peter were around long enough for y'all to get real acquainted with them.

in canon, sirius black is an unhinged mf. genuinely. this isn't to say he's a bad guy, in fact, we see that he's still capable of doing good things, still capable of love, still capable of all the things that prove he's actually not bad at heart, just,,, severely traumatised and very steeped in negativity from his time with the dementors. what i'm saying is that this man is absolutely, no questions asked, no holds barred demented, and how could he not be? the guy sat wrongfully imprisoned in azkaban for twelve years, a good portion of which he spent as a dog in order to protect himself from the dementors. he certainly wasn't completely insane, but you cannot tell me that he was all there. he got out of azkaban fuelled almost solely by the intent to get revenge on pettigrew, tried to commit murder in front of three witnesses who were also children—one of whom was his godson—ate rats and was also malnourished, which i'm certain did not help the situation any. this man is off his goddamn rocker, and you know what? you love to see it. good for him.

oh, but, snek, that's what he's like as an adult. what about when they were at school? before azkaban? my guy, the reaction he has to grimmauld place is not the reaction of someone without trauma. i don't believe that walburga and orion were the type to physically abuse their children, but whatever happened in that house helped to fuck him up enough that he skipped the joke of part of practical joke, and pranked snape by telling him how to meet a werewolf that he knew would be fully transformed and dangerous to humans. more than that, the werewolf was remus, whom he's friends with, and who—best case scenario—would be facing a trial if james hadn't stepped in. you can say that maybe he didn't think about or understand the gravitas of his actions, but at the end of it, that's not how properly sane people react to people they dislike, and that's not how they treat their friends. if anything, it reads like he was in the middle of a breakdown and absolutely losing his shit and he wasn't thinking at all.

my guy went through some serious shit, and was in no way completely mentally stable. we can see pretty clearly that he's got a serious dark side to him that probably would have gone unbridled had he not disagreed with his family, and yet, fanon took one look at him and went, "teehee, uwu bad boi go vroom."

fanon said padfoot is a pretty boy with nice hair who is tastefully traumatised from his horribly abusive household. sirius rides his motorcycle and plays jokes and flirts with anything that moves, but he can do no real wrong and always comes back to his soft, bookish, chocolate-loving boyfriend remus, who will laugh about his lycanthropy and quietly disapprove but secretly laugh at his friends' antics while hiding his smile in his cardigan.

respectfully, what in the absolute fuck.

i'd put that meme in here if i could, the one that's like, "well done, you've broken _______ down to its bare essentials," but no. i can't bc it doesn't even apply. this isn't a meme, it's theseus' fucking ship.

fanon broke it down, and replaced the pieces one by one until we got to this point, where we need to sit down and ask ourselves, "is this even the same character?"

the answer is no, by the way. it isn't. when people talk about woobifying characters—you know, taking away every flaw they have, romanticising everything they do and making them only capable of doing good, wonderful, lovely things?—this is what we mean.

and it'd be one thing if it was just the one character, but, no. fanon went all in and made them all squeaky clean and boring, especially peter, who draws the shortest of the straws.

remus got fucked, too. not just because fanon insists on sticking him into a relationship with sirius. which, we'll tackle wolfstar in a bit, but that's not even the worst of it. here, we have yet another example of blatant, rampant woobifying. again, is he a bad person? no. we know he's a good guy, we know he's generally kind and well-mannered, we know that he wants to fo the right thing but hey, fun fact. did you know that you can be nice and a coward? did you know that you can be benevolent and good and kindly and have the greatest of intentions and still be shady as fuck? no? ask dumbledore. the man played people like chess pieces when he needed to, and he was a twinkly grandpa. these are things that can coexist.

teenage remus is a coward who, understandably, does not stand up to his friends, likely for fear of being ostracised, and doesn't uphold his prefect duties as he should and takes part in their bullying of snape as a result. he lets them romp with him in werewolf form while they are in their animagus forms and then, he lets them continue to do so even after they have multiple close calls, which, again, had anything happened, would have resulted in a trial in the best case scenario.

grownup remus is still a coward, he tells no one that sirius can move about the school in his animagus form despite wholeheartedly believing that he's a mass murderer, he tries to run out on his wife and unborn kid. he isn't deliberately making attempts to harm anyone, but he's content to sit back and let things happen to him and around him so he doesn't rock the boat, although he is capable of action, which we see when he is more than willing to help sirius merk pettigrew in the shack. he can be careless, he runs out to the shack knowing he hasn't taken his wolfsbane and ends up transforming in front of the students he, as a teacher, is meant to be protecting. of course, this doesn't negate his good qualities, it just bears repeating that his flaws do exist, and they're pretty serious.

fanon moony is always pleasant and kind and soft-spoken and bookish, and he always has to have his chocolate. he knows when to tell off his friends, and he'll do it, even if he's secretly amused by everything they do and laughs about it with his best friend, lily evans, who coincidentally spends all her time with them so he and sirius can go on double dates with james and lily and no one has to remember peter exists.

why. theseus' ship 2.0. does the actual character still exist or is this something entirely different thing bearing the same name?

as for peter, who needs peter pettigrew, the actual, legitimate, fourth marauder when you have lily evans? canon pettigrew is opportunistic as fuck. he's latching himself to the biggest bad on the block and he's going all in. for teenage peter, that was james and sirius, and for adult peter, that's voldemort. canon peter is good enough at transfiguration to master the animagus transformation, just like his friends, and he's good enough at potions to brew the potion that gives voldemort a body. and honestly, you can't say he wasn't brave. he could've run off somewhere and died, or changed his identity or something after he faked his death and framed sirius, but, no. he goes and resurrects voldemort. that's fucked up, yeah, but it happened and honestly, i respect that it. he stuck to his guns.

fanon wormtail is lucky if he exists beyond being a spineless sycophant for james and sirius, or an evil conniving little rat who's looking to toss his entire friend group to the wolves at eleven.

of course, this isn't meant to negate his bad qualities, he still murdered people and framed sirius and sold out the potters to die, but his good characteristics do exist, and james, sirius and remus genuinely were his friends.

and now, we get to lily and james.

we have hardly any information on either of them. they're a pair of cardboard cutouts that we can paint and stick flyers to and colour outside the lines however we want. we can do whatever the fuck, as long lily is brave and smart and somewhat kind and james is brave and willing to die for his family. we were essentially handed a pair of ocs.

and yet.

what little bits of canon we have are thrown out of the window regardless.

james is privileged and rich, and he throws hexes for fun. he's willing to hex lily when she disagrees with him, and then, he goes behind her back to continue hexing snape after she believes that he's stopped doing so. and that's all we know about him until he dies for his family at twenty-one years old. once again, say it with me: this does not negate his good qualities. he definitely had them, he took sirius in when sirius ran away from home, he became an animagus to keep remus company as a wolf, and he saved snape in the shack, thereby saving remus and sirius by extension. him having flaws does not make him a bad person.

fanon prongs is a feminist. he fights for equal rights for women everywhere, and he constantly treats his girlfriend, lily, like an absolute queen. he's the hottest boy in school and everyone claps when he walks through the halls. mcgonagall and dumbledore are always patting him on the back and making jokes with him. he has a built-in dark detector that helps him sense when someone is a evil and needs to he punished.

give me a break. the dude's cool and all, but was the gary stu treatment necessary?

...oh, he needed to match fanon lily? right, right.

canon lily is a contradiction unto herself. she's supposedly a great friend, but since we see her at a point where they were already drifting apart, we see her putting little effort into keeping their friendship afloat. she victim blames based on rumours, she doesn't seem to care over much about what snape has to say about the people who have been tormenting him since day one. and she's justified, of course, she doesn't have to stick around. canon lily is a bit of hypocrite, she says that snape calls everyone of her birth mudblood, but then that begs the question why she still hangs around with him if that's the case. he calls her mudblood, she retaliates by calling him snivellus, and finishes up with a dig about his underwear, which, sure, it's kicking a man with a rusty spoon and pouring salt in the wound, but she's, again, justified. i get where she was coming from. and then, of course, she dies for her kid after marrying the guy who relentlessly bullied her quote-unquote best friend for their entire school careers. but, like i said, canon lily is, in many ways, a contradiction.

lily is basically a plot device. she pushes everyone's narrative but her own, and does little else.

of course, this trend would continue in fanon. fanon lily exists to be the perfect girl who gets really angry over the slightest injustice, and of course, she gets to be one half of one of the oldest enemies-to-lovers "it was just sexual tension" cliche pairings in the book. she's just,,, a mary sue. in so many fics, so many headcanons, she's just pettigrew's stand-in, a girl to form a gang with marlene, mary and dorcas—who happen to be more undeveloped ocs who also get the woobify mary sue treatment—to parallel the marauders. there is nothing compelling about her character when she's presented as a saint, and even less when she's supposedly the other moral compass for the marauders that doesn't actually work because she thinks that james is cute.

and this brings me to the next topic. jily. what, why, how. this was supposed to be a healthy, happy relationship that would have lasted in the long run? absolutely not. even for its time, i can't say that i see it lasting.

first of all, jkr presents james' crush on lily as just that: a crush. a mildly obsessive one, but a crush nonetheless, which she tries to liken to the pulling of pigtails. and then, we see that james' way of getting her to go out with him consists of blackmail, and when that doesn't work, he resorts to threatening her. this could have been set aside if he had actually, genuinely changed when they started spending more time together, but as we're told by sirius and remus, he didn't. he just got better at hiding what he was up to. and it has to be that he hid it, because if she knew, this further damages the character that she's set up to have and paints her out to be either unable to stand up to him or an enabler.

regardless, they get married. and while i have trouble believing that it was out of genuine love, there are scenarios that could make some semblance of sense. it's wartime, after all, and maybe lily is worried about her stability in the wizarding world, so why not marry into an established family whose son is already showing interest? or perhaps, she falls into the trap of every bad boy cliche ever, and she thinks to herself, well, i got him to be better then, maybe i can get him to do even better in the future. or maybe, she doesn't get into a relationship with him immediately and sees him on and off, until eventually, she accidentally gets pregnant and they scramble to have a shotgun wedding so as not to leave lily alone at nineteen with a baby. or maybe they marry each other because they're there and sure, neither of then is ready and they don't know what love even is but what else is there to do when there's a dark lord about? anyways, the point is, they get married.

and then what? if we count pottermore into canon, he goes on to further damage her relationship with petunia and vernon, to the point where she ends up crying. if we don't, she fades into the background enough that nobody has anything to say about her. she's harry's mum, she's james' wife, lily potter, she was kind and smart and brave and that's it. her agency is gone, anything else we have of her personality is gone.

jily just,,, wasn't built to last. and, yeah, this,,, this is a hill i'll die on.

same with wolfstar, honestly. there are so many reasons why it wouldn't work, but fanon has made it so fucking prevalent that it's literally everywhere no matter where you look.

first of all, i've said it before and i'll say it again. sirius is more likely to get with james that he is to ever end up in a relationship with remus. their chemistry is just,,, underdeveloped. net zero for a relationship.

secondly, sirius instigated the werewolf prank, and lupin would have paid the price for it. this could have been overlooked, but he doesn't seem the slightest bit guilty about any of it when it's brought up in poa. he could have been responsible for lupin losing the security of his place at hogwarts in the best case scenario, and in the worst case, his life. and he seems to look forward to full moons, even though they clearly aren't pleasant for remus, which,,, yeah, you're going to have fun, but like, maybe be concerned about the fact that your friend undergoes excruciating pain and it isn't a pleasant time for him? read the room, my g.

thirdly, they don't trust each other as much as fanon seems to think they do. they were both willing to believe each other the traitor before ever suspecting pettigrew. sirius thought remus gave away the potters, hell, he thought remus was a spy for voldemort, and remus was convinced that sirius was a mass murderer. neither of them needed to be convinced.

fourthly, maybe i'm reading too much into it, but like. sirius had money. remus had no money, since, yk, he was a werewolf and struggling for cash and still, sirius,,, did not leave him any money. i feel like if you had money to spare, you would give to your friend who is literally poor. but, again, maybe i'm reading too much into it and this isn't as valid a point as i think it is.

and ehh, the fifth reason is that it's,,, actually very much not the representation for the ltgbt community that fanon says it is but y'all aren't ready for that conversation.

anyways, just,,, even when you set the couple shit aside, the power dynamics between everyone here is fucked. like, james and sirius are clearly at the top of food chain calling the shots and egging each other on. then there's lily, who isn't even a marauder, but is always ever-so-slightly above remus but still not on their level, because, well. neither of them actually listen to her. remus is the novelty friend, the friend who's,,, alright, i guess, but you keep them around specifically because they're funny or they can dance or they have something that you can either show off to other people or keep as your little inside joke, your little secret, yk? and peter is just sort of there. like, yeah, he can do what we can but does that make him as good as we are? no. does he have a funny little something about him that we can exploit? nah. therefore he sits at the bottom. and like, yeah, james and sirius are on the same level, but james is yanking sirius' chain, not the other way around. anyways, like i said. power dynamic's fucked and it bothers me that we were given all of this, and fanon decided to take it all and throw it away so they could give us flamboyant!badboi!sirius black x softboi!motherhen!remus lupin going on double dates with feminist!trustfundbaby!james potter and saint!lily evans while ignoring peter pettiwho?

theseus' fucking ship, indeed.

anyways, this needed to be said. it might not make as much sense as i want it to, considering it's 4:12 in the morning as i'm posting this, after taking a break from writing to do some research and coming across way too much content about fanon marauders, but it's here and it still makes enough sense that you can read it and understand what i mean. and like, at the end of the day, you can go ahead and headcanon whatever you please, you can write fic and make art and do whatever you like, just,,, remember that they're exactly that. headcanons. stop presenting fanon as canon. please. i'm literally begging. we actually have evidence against it. just,,, acknowledge that they're headcanons and stop putting them forward as though they're able to fit into canon. please.