#i only got him cos of the guaranteed thing after however many pulls

[ovenmade]

FINALLY got Lemon Zest the other day so now I'm a part of the cool club!! And I also got Snow Crystal today, though my game crashed before I got a proper screenshot lol. I love her so much though!

[fanficimagery]

Five Years After

Imagine going to the feed store for your sister, only you come home with more than just feed for the animals.

Words: 5.1K Author’s Note: The ending of this imagine was definitely inspired by a TikTok video :)

When the Blip happened, you were in complete disbelief. Chaos erupted all around as planes fell from the sky and automobiles crashed because their drivers had vanished into thin air. Everyone was a complete mess as they attempted to call loved ones, their calls going straight to voicemail or being answered by another family member that were having to deliver the bad news of a disappearance.

Your only living relative was your sister Laura and her children she had with her husband Clint, so when one of your co-workers and a handful of your customers vanished into thin air, your first call had been to your ex-Avenger of a brother-in-law. Unfortunately Clint was just as clueless as you and the phone had nearly slipped from your hand when he gave you the news that Laura and the kids had vanished. You had nowhere to go and were so scared because of the looting that had started, so Clint told you to pack your things and get to the farm as soon as possible.

You'd only been on the farm for a full day before Clint's friends came looking for him. Natasha, who you had met after your sister had married Clint, greeted you with a rather solemn hug. It was Steve Rogers, however, who attempted to introduce himself with as much joy as he possibly could in order to be polite.

You had shaken his hand, smiling sadly. "You don't need to force a smile for me, Rogers. The circumstances suck. I get it."

That had surprisingly pulled a short laugh from Natasha. "See, Steve? Told you she wouldn't be expecting the Man with a Plan."

Steve and Natasha had proceeded to stay for the duration of the day, telling Clint all about a fight that had taken place in Wakanda and who out of their friends had vanished. It was a devastating blow and you had no idea how everyone was going to cope. Then soon after the two Avengers had left, Clint went into overdrive. He was making phone calls left and right, packing bags and weapons, and you were at a complete loss.

You had decided to leave him be and it was only the following morning when you woke to an empty house did you find the letter on the kitchen counter. In the letter he had apologized for leaving you after everything that had happened, but went on to explain that there were criminals still out there who had survived the Blip when others who were sin-free didn't. He couldn't leave them be while people like his wife and children were no longer alive, so to work through his aggression he was going to hunt those criminals down. Fortunately enough, he left you in possession of the farm-house and made it so you were able to access his bank accounts. He told you not to look for him or get the others involved, so you waited a whole day before contacting Natasha and telling her all about Clint's derailment.

Clint left no trail, leaving you all alone. Or so you thought.

With Clint's vanishing act, Natasha and Steve made you their responsibility. They made sure you knew they were only a call or email away, but only after Nat drove down to give you some technological devices since the regular power grid was fluctuating. Since Earth lost half its population, everything seemed to be falling apart.

Then Tony Stark was brought back home and the world seemed a little bit brighter.

For years you drifted, working at a grocery store in town to keep yourself busy. The Blip took a toll on everyone, but it was nice to have to talk to someone even if the other person moved on autopilot. Clint sent an email every other month from a burner email, so it was a dead end every time Natasha looked into it after you had forwarded it to her. And about the only news-worthy thing that had happened after the Blip was the announcement of Tony and Pepper Stark's baby girl Morgan. You didn't know the Stark's personally, but it didn't stop you from sending their little girl a present every year on her birthday for the next five years on behalf of yourself and the Barton family.

One morning you're sitting at the breakfast table when you hear the telltale sounds of a jet overheard. You figure it's just Natasha and Steve for their monthly check-in so you think nothing of it.

The screen door creaks open and you call out, "In the kitchen!"

The steps of what sounds like more than one person falter, but then they pick back up until they near your location. "Got enough for another plate?" That oh so familiar timber makes you spew orange juice across the table. You're up and out of your seat, staring at your brother-in-law who's a lot more tatted up than you remember him being. "Hey, sis."

Tony Stark stands just a couple feet to Clint's right, but his presence isn't enough to deter you from marching up to your brother-in-law and punching his shoulder. "You asshole!" You punch him again for good measure as tears sting your eyes. "You left me. You left me all alone! How could you-"

He dodges your continuous blows, wrapping his arms around you to keep you from attacking him. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but I'm here now. It's all going to be okay." The fight instantly drains out of you as you sag into his embrace, sob after sob leaving you as you clutch to him tightly.

Clint tightens his grip a little more around you until your cries turn into sniffles. "What- what are you doing here?"

"Lang came up with a plan to bring our people back." You tense in Clint's arms and pull back to look him in the eyes. "Banner and Stark made the machines necessary to make the plan work. We're going to bring 'em home. We're going to bring 'em all home, Y/N."

"Please tell me you aren't joking," you mumble.

"Nope. No joke," Tony says. "It's not a total guarantee, but we're going to try our best." You let go of Clint and turn to look at Tony who's standing by the stove and picking at the leftover scrambled eggs. "Mmm. These are good. What'd you put in them?"

"Uhh, just butter and cheese."

"Morgan would absolutely love these. She's on this whole cheese kick right now."

That earns a chuckle, and after gathering yourself you look back at Clint. "So what's going to happen now?"

"The team's getting ready for a test run," Clint says. "I just wanted to let you know I was home and that we had a really important mission coming up."

"How soon?"

"Today if the test run goes good," Tony says. He pours himself half a glass of juice before downing it in one go. "And speaking of, we need to go."

You look at Clint, a little let down that he's leaving so soon, but he grins and pulls you back into a hug. "It's going to be okay." You nod against him and he lets his arms drop before he steps back. He looks around the kitchen and his grin widens. "You've kept up good with the house. I'm impressed."

"I should hope so," you mumble. "I had to flirt with the hardware store boy so he'd help me keep the house from falling apart."

Clint laughs. "You did good, Y/N. Laura will be proud."

"Yeah, yeah. Now go bring my sister, niece, and nephews back."

"You got it, boss."

          - - - - - - - - - - 

You're grateful for the day off because it leaves you with time to clean the house from top to bottom. You need some way to burn off all your anxiousness and making sure the house looks good for your sister is one hell of a way to do just that.

You're not sure how long you'd been cleaning when you decide to take a break, and you head outside for some fresh air. You walk off the porch and onto the grass, tilting your face skyward as you inhale and exhale softly, your eyes closing. One moment all you can hear is the wind ruffling tree limbs and grass, and the next it's a cacophony of chirping birds.

Your eyes fly open and you're shocked to see the swarms of birds flying around in the sky. Sure there have been birds around after the Blip, but you've never seen so many together since then. You're too busy staring up into the sky that you don't see what appears to be ash take formation behind you.

"Aunt Y/N?" The timid voice makes your heart stop before you whirl around, your eyes widening at the sight of Lila glancing around in shock. "What's going on? Where's dad?"

"Lila?" You breathe out in awe. You stumble towards her, eyes glistening with tears. "They did it. They actually did it." You pull her into a hug, cries stuttering in your chest. As you hug her, you glance towards the open field where you see Laura appear, followed by Nathaniel and then Cooper. "Laura!"

You grip Lila's hand tight as the both of you break out into a run towards the rest of your family, you and Laura colliding with twin oomphs. The two of you are crying as Laura tries to work out what the hell happened and where Clint is, but before you can explain anything she's pulling her phone out of her pocket and dialing Clint's number. As she worries about getting her husband on the phone, you quickly hug Cooper and pick up Nathaniel to hold on your hip as you squeeze him in relief.

"Clint?" Laura sobs when he finally answers. "Clint, what's going on? I-" She stops talking all of a sudden and she looks at you, eyes wide.

"What happened?" You ask.

"I- I don't know. One second he was talking and then-" She cuts off, glancing at her children and shaking her head. "He just cut out."

You know all is not fine and that something terrible must have happened for Laura to trail off the way she did. But instead of worrying her kids, you offer a grin. "I'm sure it's fine. As clumsy as he is, he probably just dropped his phone." She forces a smile for her kids' benefit. "So why don't we go ahead and wait for him inside. I'll make something to eat while you guys relax and I'll catch you up on the five years you missed."

"Five years!?" Laura nearly shouts.

You wince. "Yeah. You guys missed a lot."

          - - - - - - - - - - 

For the next couple of hours you tell Laura all about the Blip and how half of Earth's population just disappeared- Avengers included. You tell her how Clint had you move in, and how you helped take care of the house and what few animals they had on the farm still while working at the local grocery store. You tell her all about Steve and Natasha, and how Tony Stark is now married with a daughter of his own.

"Wow." Laura chuckles. All the kids have fallen asleep around the living room, leaving Laura the time to finally ask, "And where was Clint this entire time? I noticed he brought you onto the farm, but then everything became about Steve and Nat."

You suck in a breath sharply. "I was hoping you wouldn't notice that."

"Y/N.."

"He went rogue." Her eyes widen and you wince. "He left me here with access to your bank account, which I only used to pay bills and buy groceries by the way, and not even Natasha could find him. He only came back when she tracked him down and told him there was a chance they could reverse the Blip."

"Oh Clint.." She sighs, shaking her head in disappointment.

The sound of a quinjet hovering makes you and Laura perk up, but you keep quiet so as to not wake the children. You and Laura meet each other's gazes before you carefully get up and tiptoe out of the living room, and then you're rushing out the front door and down onto the lawn.

The door drops down and then Laura is sprinting across the field to reach her husband. You joyously laugh, jogging over to catch up. But as Laura and Clint hug one another, sobbing, you turn your sights to Steve who's standing sheepishly off to the side. There are two others with him, but since you've yet to meet them you make your way towards the familiar.

"Hey Rogers. Good to see you in one piece."

He tiredly chuckles. "Y/N." You punch his arm and he opens them up so you can hug him. "How are you holding up?"

"Better now that I got my sister back," you muse. As you pull away, you glance behind him into the quinjet. "Hey, where's Natasha?" Steve's smile falls and your heart plummets into your stomach. You can practically read the answer in his eyes. "No.." You shake your head.

His breathing stutters before he clears his throat. "We, uh, we lost Tony too."

Your expression completely crumples then, but Steve is quick to pull you back into a hug. He lets you cry into his chest before Clint steals you away, and then you're crying into your brother-in-law's shoulder. Then once all the tears taper off, Steve introduces you and Laura to Wanda and Bucky.

"I'll be in contact with you about what Pepper decides to do," Steve tells Clint. "If you do anything for Nat, let me know."

Clint sniffles. "I will."

You, Clint, and Laura wave off Steve, Wanda, and Bucky as they return inside the quinjet and lift off.

"Come on," Clint then sighs. "I need to see the kids and then figure out a way to tell them all about auntie Nat's sacrifice."

"And plan a memorial," Laura says.

You frown. "This was not the homecoming I was hoping for."

After a few days of planning, Clint decides on a cookout with all the Avengers and close friends of Nat's invited. It was a couple of days before Tony's own memorial, so you were surprised when Pepper Stark showed up with Morgan in tow. You were happy to finally meet the young girl who you'd been sending gifts to and you gladly ended up on babysitting duty.

You had met more of Clint's ex-coworkers, but your attention always ended up back on the children. Then when it came time to say a few words on Natasha's behalf, you somehow ended up between Steve and Bucky as the children ran back to their respective parents with Steve tucking you into his side when the tears started.

Then when the day of Tony's memorial came, there were more guests than you had anticipated. So as Pepper and Morgan walked a small flower raft with an arc reactor replica on it and set it out on the water, you stood back with Laura and her family and waited in silence. And as the crowd dispersed, you mostly kept to yourself until you saw Steve walk out of Pepper's home in the oddest white and red suit you'd ever seen.

Walking up behind Steve, you nod at Bucky and Sam who grin at your presence. When Steve turns around, you chuckle. "Why do I got a feeling you're about to do something very stupid?"

He grins and adjusts his grip on the suitcase hanging by his side. "Someone's gotta return the stones to their original timeline."

"Mhm. Well be careful. Don't start any unnecessary fights."

"I'll try my best."

As he walks up onto the platform, you step back and nudge your arm against Bucky's. He smiles down on you and you stand by his side as you listen to Bruce who walks Steve through about what's going to happen. Bruce checks all his monitors, giving Steve the go-ahead when everything is fine. Steve nods, a mask of sorts opens up and wraps around his face, and he presses a button that had been in his hand. Bruce counts down the seconds before he flips a switch which is meant to bring Steve back, but nothing happens.

Bruce looks around his monitors and starts pressing some more buttons. "Where is he?" Sam asks.

"I don't know. He blew right by his time stamp. He should be here," Bruce says as he flips a few more switches.

Bucky sighs and you quickly glance at him, and he looks more resigned than anything as he turns to walk off.

Your attention goes to Bruce as your heart rate picks up. "Get him back."

"I'm trying."

"Get him the hell back!" Sam urges.

You and Sam are low-key panicking, but it's Bucky's calm voice that stops the both of you. "Y/N. Sam."

The two of you whirl around, gazes sliding towards where Bucky is staring off to. In the distance, on a stone bench by the water, there appears to be a man sitting there that wasn't there before. You and Sam stumble forward, and you squint your eyes, only to glance back at Bucky with wide eyes.

"Is that.."

"Go."

You share another look with Sam and he gestures for you to follow him. The two of you walk towards the man together and Sam stops just behind him as you walk around in front. When you get a good look at your friend who is way older than what he appeared to be a mere twenty seconds ago, your heart cracks just a little.

You try to force a smile, but it wobbles as an elderly Steve chuckles at you. "I'm really trying not to be so mad at you right now." Your voice cracks and he pats the spot next to him as you sniffle. You immediately sit next to him and take his left hand within your own two, a gleaming wedding band not going unnoticed. Your fingers trace it. "Was it at least a happy life?"

Steve pats your hand. "It was. It was the beautiful life I always dreamt of."

You take a moment for yourself, inhaling and exhaling deeply. "You know you were my complete impulse control, right? Who's going to stop me from trying to get into your best friend's pants now?"

There's a snort from behind you, but you don't bother giving Sam your attention. "Go easy on him," Steve tells you. "I'm not sure he even remembers how to flirt."

You grin as you lean your head on his shoulder. "I'm really going to miss you," you say after a beat. Another moment passes before you drop Steve's hand and sigh before you stand. "Well, um, I should get back my sister and Clint now." You meet his gaze and flash him a small smile. "It's going to suck not seeing you every month, but I'm really glad you found your happiness."

"Thank you, Y/N."

Your bottom lip wobbles again. "Goodbye, Steve."

As you walk away, you hold your head up high and nod to Sam when he looks at you to make sure you're okay. You continue walking, nodding at Bucky as you pass him up as well when you see Laura wave you over. "For the record, I still remember how to flirt." You stumble and and then hear Bucky chuckling quietly behind you.

"Goddamn super soldiers and your dog ears."

As the days turn into weeks, Clint and Laura offer you a permanent place on the farm now that everything seems to be going back to normal. He's promised to build you a small house on the property for all that you've done in the past five years, so in the meantime you've taken to bunking with Lila while Wanda took over the guest bedroom. Clint had also taken to bringing Bucky to the farm when he noticed the super soldier not coping as well as he was letting on, so you found yourself often sitting by the back pond with him as the two of you traded stories about Steve and yourselves.

Though you had originally joked about getting into Bucky's pants, you found yourself seeking friendship from him more than anything else and vice versa. So when you weren't working at the grocery store, you were watching the kids for Laura and Clint or hanging out with Bucky and Wanda. It was no surprise to anyone that the three of you latched on to one another after losing those that you did.

"Hey Y/N," Laura calls out. "Will you do me favor?"

You glance up as she walks out the front door, you and Wanda ceasing your conversation. You grin. "What do you need?"

"Lucky needs some dog food and we need a few bales of hay for the goats."

"Oh. Okay." You look towards Wanda. "Wanna go for the ride?"

She shrugs. "Sure."

"Thank you! You can just put it on the Barton tab at the store," Laura says. "Clint pays it monthly and I've already called ahead to let them know someone was going in to pick up some stuff we needed."

"Got it." Standing up, you pat down your pockets to make sure you have your keys, phone, and some cash. Realizing you have everything, you grin at your sister before walking down the porch steps. As you near your truck, you whistle at Bucky who was throwing knives at a target on the side of the barn. "Hey Buckaroo! We're heading into town. You wanna come?"

He throws the last knife in his hand before he turns to look at you. "Don't call me Buckaroo!" He shouts back as he makes his way towards you.

"Then stop lookin' so darn cute!"

Wanda snorts and you laugh as Bucky shakes his head at you. "One of these days he's going to flirt back and then what are you going to do?"

"Bend myself over the table and let him hit it from behind," you mumble. She snorts harder this time and your eyes widen when you see Bucky start to smirk.

As he nears the two of you, he says, "What did you say?"

"Nothing," you blurt. "Nothing at all. Wanda's just easily amused, is all."

His gaze slides to Wanda, but she shakes her head and doesn't tell him a word. You mentally sigh and praise her for being a good friend, and then you turn to walk towards your truck. Wanda readily heads for the back driver's side door while Bucky walks around to the passenger seat so he's seated next to you.

Once you're seated behind the wheel and the engine is turned on, you take a moment to find a decent song on the radio before driving. It's not too long of a drive and you find yourself pulling up to the local feed store not even three songs later.

Parking and cutting the engine right in front of the store, you turn towards Bucky. You know he's not a huge fan of being out in public, but you rather not have to flirt inside the store to get a helping hand. "Hey Buck, can you do me a favor and load up four of those large rectangular bales of hay and one bag of that dog food right next to it?" You see him tense. "I rather not have to flirt with the boy inside just so he'll help out."

He relaxes then and gives you a nod. "Yeah. Sure."

"Thanks. Just keep watch through the window. Wait 'til I give the signal for you to start loading up." He gives you another nod and you turn around to face Wanda. "Wanna head inside with me?"

Wanda grins and readily opens her door, you and Bucky following right after. But as you and Wanda head inside, Bucky remains by the tailgate of your truck and keeps watch through the large front window as you had said. Inside, Mr. Reeves is waiting by the cash register and keeping an eye on Bucky outside.

"Don't worry, Mr. Reeves. He's with me." Mr. Reeves glances at you, smiling in relief. "I need four large bales of hay and a fifty pound bag of dog food."

Mr. Reeves starts punching buttons on his register. "Alright, sweetheart. Is that going to be all for you?"

"Sure is. Um, Laura asked if you can put it on the tab? Clint will be by at the end of the week."

"Sure thing." You turn towards the window and give Bucky a thumbs up. He turns to open the tailgate and then move towards the bales of hay to start loading up. Mr. Reeves chuckles. "That's a strong fella you got there."

His words make you blush and Wanda giggle, but you can't even reprimand your friend because she is further away than you expected. She's leaning over what appears to be a warming box, hand inside as she smiles down at something you can't see. "Whatcha got there, Red?"

Her smile widens as you hear small chirps. "Ducklings."

You walk over to her, peering inside and your heart absolutely melts. Inside are the cutest ducklings you've ever seen and you know you're done for when you set your hand down inside and one particular little duckling runs onto your palm.

Mr. Reeves walks over, chuckling. "They were hatched a few days ago. All have been looking mighty strong and are ready to go to good homes."

"How much?"

"Y/N," Wanda laughs. "What are you doing?"

"I'm taking this little sucker with me." You pick up your hand, duckling still happily nestled in your palm as you cradle him to your chest and look at Mr. Reeves. "Any chance you have those small plastic kiddie pools?"

"As a matter of fact I do," he muses.

Wanda is giggling the entire time Mr. Reeves gets exactly what you need, you nuzzling the yellow fuzzball to your face. You pay with your own money and sadly hand over the duckling when Mr. Reeves has to box her up. You then carefully take the box from him as Wanda takes the kiddie pool, and you walk behind her as you make your way to the truck.

You have absolutely no regrets about buying the duckling, but you still hide the box as you walk around the truck and open the driver's door. Wanda shoves the kiddie pool into the back with her and Bucky turns so his gaze darts between the both of you- Wanda looking far too amused and you looking a little sheepish as you continue to stand outside the truck.

"What did you do?" He sighs.

"Well we went in to just buy the food," Wanda says, "but-"

"I bought a duck." You blurt. You finally put the box in front of you, on the seat, and you open the lid. The duckling chirps and you beam down at her, picking her up and nuzzling her once more. "I'm gonna name her Flauta." Bucky snorts and Wanda laughs uncontrollably then. "No one tell Laura."

"Gonna be hard to hide her, doll."

Bucky reaches over to take the duckling from you and the sight of him cradling it, holding it up to his face and smiling makes you melt once more. Wanda is staring knowingly at you, but you don't even have the urge to flip her off because you know you're fucked. Instead, you take your phone out of your back pocket and snap a picture.

"That's my new wallpaper."

Bucky doesn't bother admonishing you for taking the picture, so after setting it as your wallpaper you put your phone away and climb into your truck. He holds onto the duckling as you make the drive back to the farm, Wanda giggling every now and then when you glance at Bucky and sigh longingly.

When you make it back to the farm, Clint and Laura are on the porch as the kids play out in the yard. They both stand as you park, their expressions turning suspicious as Wanda hops out of the back with the kiddie pool in tow. You grin as you hurriedly hop out as well, leaving Bucky to carry the incriminating evidence.

You can tell he expected as much as he watches you jog around to his side of the truck, already pointing at him through the opened window. "Bucky bought a duck!"

He shakes his head at you and you blow him a kiss, Clint and Laura then joining you by the truck. "Oh really?" Your brother-in-law muses.

"Yep."

"Mhm." Clint looks to Bucky as Laura bites back a grin. "Buck, what's the duck's name?"

Without missing a beat, he says, "Flauta."

Laura finally laughs. "Nice try, Y/N." As Bucky and Wanda guess how Laura knew, she says, "When we were younger, Y/N did the same thing but with a turtle. She named him Taquito."

"And Taquito lived a long and happy life until we went off to college," you say. "Flauta will live just long, if not longer, here on the farm."

Clint chuckles and then takes the duckling from Bucky. He looks to Wanda and gestures for her to follow him. "Lets go get this little lady all set up. The kids are gonna have a blast."

Laura follows after them, but not before winking at you, and you shake your head as you're left alone with Bucky. He finally climbs out of the truck, shutting the door and then leaning against it. You nervously laugh as he smirks. "You threw me under the bus."

"I couldn't take the chance that they'd make me return Flauta." You pout. "I couldn't send her back, Buckaroo. I'd already named her."

He pushes off the truck, turning you around and laying his arm around your shoulders. For a moment you forget how to breathe. "You're just as bad as Steve."

"Oh whatever." You roll your eyes, grinning as your arm wraps around the back of his waist and start walking towards where Clint went. "Steve got you shot at. I momentarily put you in momma bear's crosshairs." He quietly chuckles. "And besides, I didn't hear you deny it. Admit it, Barnes, I'm growing on you."

"Like a fungus."

You pinch his side. "Oh fuck off." He fully laughs then. "Just you wait, Buckaroo. The day we decide to put sex on the list of things we should definitely be doing, I'm gonna withhold just because you're being an ass."

"You sure about that?" The teasing lilt to his voice suddenly makes you feel at unease. "You sure you won't immediately bend over the table and let me hit it from behind?"

Your face flames, but you can't help but laugh at your earlier words. When you manage to calm down, you can't help but say, "I hate you," as you finish making your way towards your family.

"Nice try, doll, but I'm calling bullshit."

[refurbishedgray]

Point of Contact

Reader x Tech. Maybe we get feisty and it’s reader x Crosshair, too. In this house, we like both.

Multi-part fic; probably NSFW; f!reader (she/her pronouns)

**Updates: I’ll tag you if you holler

Summary:

“No good ever comes to the Republic from Banking Clan business,” Hunter tells them, “Let’s get this done and get home, boys.”

Arriving on Scipio with the unhelpful directive of, “be discreet, but do whatever it takes,” the Bad Batch find themselves at the mercy of a stony representative whose allegiances lie with the best deal.

Or, the one where Tech and Crosshair think the reader is as intense as she is pretty.

**************************************

Part One

The office is too empty, too bright. The merciless glare of Scipio’s sun cuts across the room, gleaming unpleasantly from the gilded corners of all the fine furniture and glass. A corner office, inherited from an out-maneuvered relic of the past. 

All light and no warmth, you think, not for the first time. Never any warmth. In your early years with the Banking Clan, being stationed here had felt suspiciously like a punishment you hadn’t deserved, a proving ground when you had already proven so much. These days, however, you’ve come to understand that the frigid peaks standing vigil beyond your window are a reminder of how far you have climbed.

Now, as you shift in your chair, the expensive Corellian leather barely squeaking beneath you, you squint past the harsh light filtering in from the floor to ceiling window at your back. It’s all pristine snow on those peaks. Icy. Easy to slip if the cold didn’t kill you first.

Yes, you had climbed and clawed your way up these proverbial mountains. And like the man who last haunted this office, it has left you with so very far to fall.

The early days had been simpler. Smile. Look pretty. Never forget what can be saved for later. You hadn’t forgotten. Beyond the pale blue sky, twinkling out of sight, are worlds fraught with battles, littered with unsuccessful or unlucky tacticians from two sides of a conflict that won’t ever be ended, not truly. You have always preferred to keep your strategizing corporate. Clean. 

A frown drags at the corners of your mouth at the uncharacteristic foray into reminiscence of the…

The…

A phrase comes to mind and you allow yourself a small, private smile against the sunlight. The bad old days. 

Since then, things have always been kept tidy.

Until now. 

An unwanted spur of concern digs in behind your chest as your gaze turns from the window to sweep over the room. To your dismay, you realize why, and realize too clearly that the concern is not solely for yourself. 

He should be here.

Things were less empty when he was around, a relic in his own right and your pride and joy and confidant. How proud you had been when you had been informed that you would require a bodyguard. “A mark of success if there ever was one,” you had told the few family members you kept in contact with, of which there were very few, upon being informed of the recommendation after your previous promotion. “Aren’t you proud?” you had wanted to ask. But you had not asked. Better not to make the query when the answer was always so heavy and obvious. 

He had become your one and only friend. But he, too, is absent now, and upon permitting the observation, your office seems at once less empty and instead, guttingly, horribly hollow. Two rotations it’s been. Two rotations to give into the inconvenience of noticing.  

No, no, you think. You had noticed. Admitting it, that is the phrase that would be more accurate, but if it makes you feel less or more weak, you find you cannot decipher the bitterness creeping up your tongue.

Rising from your seat, you at once miss the meager warmth provided by the leather as the cool office air licks at you. Once upon a time, you had comforted yourself with the promise that one day, you would get used to the cold here. It was one of the few lies you allotted yourself over the years. Crossing the office, the marble floors as white and frosted as the mountain peaks outside resounding crisply beneath your heels, you make your way to the small bar trolley tucked away in one corner. Your last guest, a senator with strong -- unsubtly strong -- ties to the Clan, had complimented your selection of fine whiskeys and other alcohols. You had not admitted then that you did not keep the bar stocked for the guests who were few and far between, but rather for yourself, to chase away the damnable chill in this place. 

Your hand stills between decanters, your mind hesitating at the threatening burn that awaits your selection.

A bad habit.

You can imagine that peculiar modulated voice now. “Madam, the faces you make.”

Instead, you shun the alcohol and the ice that never thaws, yet still gets replaced each morning, now resting in a round chest, as gilded as everything else in this room, and reach for the Felucian pear juice. Duller, perhaps, but you don’t need anymore guilt on your conscience. 

A sip, then two, settles a gnawing in your stomach you only notice once it passes. 

Intolerable, you muse, downing what remains in the glass. The beverage is sweet, almost as sweet as the air outside is cold. Too quiet. Where are -

A rush of air and sliding metal breaks the silence. Glass in hand, your eyes narrow over the rim at the assistant who scuttles in. This one has been particularly insipid since her arrival. The daughter of someone marginally important, she is small and hunched shouldered -- she hasn’t learned, not like you did, and a part of you suspects she never will. 

She stops just short of where the tile begins and as she does, your eyes track down her uniform to a pair of shoes that have never been polished. Stars help her. 

In a quavering voice, she asks, “Madam?”

You raise a brow. 

“We’ve received word. The transport with the troopers has requested permission to land. They’re on their way.”

You set the glass aside, gingerly, its bottom barely clacking against the tray atop the cart. Republic troopers. A battering ram when a scalpel is needed. 

“Ah, the Senate’s grand favor,” you murmur. 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

So many years spent with watchful eyes on you has made you good at hiding your frustrations. You swallow a sigh before it ever rises and allow yourself a brief moment to thumb the crystalline edge of the glass. The senator had warned you. 

Your voice is quiet as you instruct the girl, “Get out.”

She scurries gracelessly back through the door. It is an improvement; the last time she had squeaked pitifully before leaving. Perhaps you should have enjoyed the alcohol while you could. If this goes badly, all these nice things, all this luxury will be reassigned, a new name on the door. Such is the way of things -- you know the warnings well.  

Until forty-eight hours ago, they had been going so smoothly. An unfamiliar voice at the back of your mind whispers at you. Had you gotten complacent? You never get complacent. You had been warned for star’s sake. Senator Clovis had been all too clear that vaults here on Scipio were being targeted. You had taken that to mean the transports would be targeted as well. Credits were valuable, gold was valuable, as were artifacts and treasures. The Clan stored it all.  

But most valuable of all were and would always be secrets.

And secrets...you were very good at secrets. Finding them. Keeping them. Exposing them. 

The hand on the glass tightens and through touch or through sound, you sense that just a little more pressure will splinter it. Gently, you lift your fingers. 

You’ve got enough messes to clean up already.

.

…………….

.

Two of his brothers look unhappy. Hunter suspects he, too, looks unhappy. Only Crosshair remains unaffected, toothpick lolling from one corner of the man’s thin mouth to the other as he watches the sky shift from icy atmo to the very tips of craggy mountains. 

“Looks cold,” rumbles Wrecker from his seat, thick legs kicking out miserably. “Nobody said it was gonna be cold.”

From the pilot’s chair, Tech glances at Hunter, sitting in the co-pilot’s seat. Now that Hunter can see him full-on, rather than that goggle-obscured side-profile of his, he realizes that he’d been right. Even Tech is unhappy with the assigned locale. Still, the man sniffs and turns back to navigating the gunship.

“It is Scipio,” says Tech. 

“What’s that got to do with anything? Just sayin’, a little warning might’ve been nice.”

Crosshair shifts, the movement almost imperceptible, just enough that Hunter knows the sniper is asking for his attention. “I believe Hunter was preoccupied with warning us about the...what was it you called them, Hunter? Denizens?” 

“The word does have an apt connotation for the Banking Clan,” Tech mutters. He gives Hunter another look, this one says that he’s no more excited about the prospect than Hunter has been. 

Their mission brief had been a strange one. It wasn’t their usual brand of run-and-gun from the sound of things, but it was important to all the right people, and they needed guaranteed success. “Go to Scipio, meet the point of contact, establish the responsible party, recover the stolen data.” It was more or less all they had been told. 

Hunter knows his frown is getting deeper, sinking into the lines on his face -- he can feel it pulling at his bandana, and he raises a hand to scrub it away.

“Who is this contact anyway?” asks Crosshair. “You never said.”

“Because I wasn’t told a name. We’re to meet with the, and I quote, ‘Principal Trades Specialist for the InterGalactic Banking Clan.’”

“Trades specialist?” Crosshair plucks his toothpick from between his teeth and for a moment, it takes Hunter longer than he would like to decipher the look on the man’s face. He doesn’t look unhappy...he looks intrigued. Crosshair replaces the toothpick, then says, “Sounds like a fancy way of saying ‘corporate spy.’”

“Head corporate spy,” Tech says, “If he’s - “

“She, from what I’m told,” corrects Hunter. His frown has yet to go anywhere, so he lets it stay, his hand falling to his lap.

Tech nods. “If she is based here on Scipio, we’re dealing with someone who needs to be watched closely. Some important players are based on this planet.”

Crosshair folds his arms. “Did the spy part give it away, Tech?”

“The Banking Clan part, actually,” Tech replies dryly, “We’ve dealt with spies before. The IGBC is something different. It is...new territory.”

“We’ve also dealt with new territory before.” At this, Hunter hears them all shift, their quick heartbeats settling into a familiar, all’s-well rhythm. His, too, follows. Just in time, it would seem, for the comms to squawk at them as the Marauder banks left and begins its final descent to the landing pad. He stands from the co-pilots seat, the faint tilt of the floor beneath him a familiar calm before the inevitable storm. He looks to Wrecker, who shakes his head, and then offers a grin. 

“Might be fun. Never clobbered bad guys with snowballs before.”

There’s a snort from Tech and despite himself, Hunter smiles. 

.

**************************************

.

Ten minutes later, they are suited up and disembarking into a cloud of snow flurries and ice crystals. The Banking Clan’s guards are as heavily armored as some of the Separatist patrols Hunter’s encountered. He scowls beneath his helmet. This should be a job for Jedi -- if the Jedi weren’t all dispatched to the war front.   

Soldiers...they don’t deal with these sorts of people. Not well and not effectively. Too much bad blood between the Republic and profiteers like these.

He motions at his brothers to close ranks, their familiar presences a comforting reminder that this isn’t anything new, not really. It’s a mission like any other. 

As the frosted cloud clears ahead of them, the guards, in their gilt armor and insulated cloaks, make way, too much way, Hunter thinks, for the clearance to be for a group of Republic troopers.

Then he sees her.

Half camouflaged by the swirling winds and clad in half a dozen shades of gray and silver, her shoulders draped in white fur, she stands waiting for them, her hands clasped serenely in front of her. She could be a diplomat, a Jedi even, if not for the gleam in her eye. It’s a cold thing, sharper and as frostbitten as this frozen world itself. 

He’s not the only one to have noticed. Beside him, Hunter hears Crosshair draw in an appreciative breath so quiet no one without incredible senses would notice it. In his periphery, he catches an almost imperceptible twitch of Tech’s helmet as his brother spares him a questioning glance. 

When the woman speaks, her voice is crisp, professional. “Clone Force 99, welcome.” She does not smile, but her eyes track to each of them, lingering too long, as though somehow looking past the armor to the men beneath. She introduces herself with a name that sounds too soft for the title she wears. Then, she gives them a crystalline smile. “But you may call me Trader, if you please.”

“Trader?” It is Wrecker who asks the question, finally distracted from the snow and ice. “Sounds like…”

Another smile, this one not quite as cool as the first. Amused, Hunter thinks, though how benign that amusement is, he can’t tell, and it makes his skin itch beneath his blacks. “Like traitor?” she hums. “I suppose it does, doesn’t it?” 

She steps aside and gestures at them to follow. “With me, gentlemen. First, we’ve a meeting. Afterwards, we will take a tram to the vaults, then from there, speeders to the site of the incident.”

“‘Incident’ is an awful clean way to say ‘bloody heist,’” says Hunter as he moves to follow. Her gaze slides to him, her stride never slowing. Shoulder to shoulder with the woman, he has the uncomfortable instinct to slow his steps, to lag behind, as though if he isn’t careful, a blade might slide between his ribs on a blink. He pushes aside the urge, then asks, “How many people were lost?”

“Enough,” she replies. “One could even say too many.”

“But not you?”

“Must someone say something for you to believe they think it?”

Behind him, Crosshair snorts, but does not comment. Hunter lets the statement slide, though the itch he’d felt earlier is heating to a burn now. Together, she leads them through a set of gleaming durasteel doors into a foyer as stark as it is grand. 

“Proceed through those doors.” She crooks a finger to their left. “Senator Amidala has requested a meeting in...eighteen minutes. I will join you shortly.”

Wrecker whistles, the sound too sharp to come from beneath his helmet, and Hunter glances back to see that the man has removed it, his one good eye roving the pristine interior. With a sigh, Hunter follows suit. It’s not exactly warm here, but out from the planet’s whipping winds, it’s close enough that even he can fool his sensitive skin into enjoying it. Soon, they are all unmasked. The woman - Trader - lingers long enough to observe them.

Her expression is...unreadable. There is no twinkle of bemusement in her eyes, not the first twitch of surprise. Normally, when the helmets come off, it gets at least some sort of reaction, gives him some kind of measure. 

Now, the only read Hunter gets is the fact that he can’t get a read on her -- and that, he doesn’t like. There’s no trusting people who have become so numb. 

Her gaze slips between Crosshair and Tech, where it lingers on the latter for seconds longer than it had the rest of them. Something in her frigid eyes warms, the ice of her expression cracking just enough that she might be pleased by what she sees. And Tech...for all his usual detachment, has no datapad to bury his nose in now, and he notices. 

Hunter thinks the woman lets him notice. 

His brother stands a little straighter, eyes flicking nervously to Hunter behind his goggles. Stumped, for lack of a better word. For once, flat out puzzled. 

Then, without a word, Trader looks back to Hunter and inclines her head. “Stay warm, gentlemen. I will see you soon.”

She is gone behind a pair of adjacent doors without another word. 

No sooner do they watch the durasteel whisper shut, than does Wrecker drive his arm into Tech’s side with a chuckle. Tech winces with a hiss and waves the man away. 

“Heh, she likes you.”

“I hoped it was my imagination.” Crosshair’s lip curls, his eyes narrowing until he looks away, and Hunter wonders if they’ve been reflected back at him through the shine of Tech’s goggles.

Tech runs a hand over the back of his head. “What do you think, Hunter?”

“I think she’s Banking Clan, through and through. We’re not among friends here.”

“If we let her alone with Tech, things might get friendlier -”

“Wrecker.” 

Hunter scowls. Another voice has echoed his own and he looks to see Crosshair, arms folded, rocking back on a foot to glare at the wampa-sized man. 

Tech clears his throat. “Perhaps we should wait in the briefing room?”

His heart rate, harder to hear away from the tight confines of the Marauder, sounds schoolboy quick and Hunter wishes, not for the first time, that his brother was more inclined to find company in their off-duty hours than he was. Pretty faces were fine - Hunter himself was inclined to enjoy them - but something about the mask this one wore was dangerous.

Wrecker’s voice pulls him from his thoughts. “Did she say Senator Amidala was waiting?”

“She did. The commander warned us the Senate was at play here.”

“That’s not our usual playground though, is it?” Crosshair is still scowling, his arms folded more tightly now than they had been. All that characteristic suspicion exacerbated by annoyance that has set in and won’t leave him. It makes his eyes hard, his narrow features sharpened and cold beneath the glare of sunlight on durasteel. 

Hunter shakes his head. “It’s not, but I feel better knowing Amidala’s behind us on this.”

“That makes one of us,” says Crosshair.

“Two,” Tech interrupts, his voice crisp; back to himself, Hunter realizes, his relief warm down to his fingertips, until he isn’t sure why he’d been worried in the first place.

“Three! I like Amidala.” 

“We know, Wrecker.” Tech’s smile is gentle, even as he rolls his eyes. “The poster by your bed speaks for itself.” 

Hunter’s gaze slides to his remaining brother, the smile that had spread turning crooked, then fading. “Crosshair?” 

It’s always been an unsettling characteristic of Crosshair’s that his eyes, as brown as all of theirs, manage to be so very cold when the mood hits him. The look in them is not unlike what he had witnessed in the woman. 

The observation tightens Hunter’s throat and he swallows it, turning away, and hopes not to notice it again.

[jjungkookislife]

Fic Recs 2020 Pt. 1

Seokjin

let’s get married [SMAU] @hangsangwithbts

Summary: seokjin has no intention of getting married, but after facing tremendous pressure from his family to finally settle down, he comes up with the brilliant idea to fake a marriage. the lucky bride just so happens to be you.

voice mail @joonary

summary: kim seokjin is best known around campus for his romance advisory podcast, voice mail, but to you, he’s just your lovable idiot of a best friend. but when he accidentally lets it slip that he’s fallen for one of your fellow peers, you can’t help but be a little bit curious (and quite frankly, a tad bit jealous).

Yoongi

cheers if you agree @out-of-jams

summary: If it weren’t for the fact that he didn’t know who you were or even how to get into contact with you, Yoongi wouldn’t be posting all over Weverse for anyone to see. Not that he thought anyone would be smart enough to put the pieces of the puzzle together with how many people responded to his posts anyway.

snake kisses @peekaboongi

summary: You are grossly unprepared for the snake hybrid that enters your life. Yoongi is quiet and sneaks around you but eventually, even the cold reptile warms up to you.

under construction [SMAU] @luffles424

summary: In which y/n is just trying to figure out what to do with her life with the help from her (un)helpful friends

Hoseok

going once, going twice, sold @bxebxee

summary: But the real reason anything at all started with Hoseok was something much simpler, and probably wholly unexpected - not that you ever planned on any of the other members of the MBA Society to find out.You leave your unlocked phone in his car before stumbling your way into your tiny, studio apartment. And he sees a twitter notification asking you for further discount on your panties.That is all it takes.

just practice @lamourche

summary: The second time you hook up with Jung Hoseok, he doesn’t remember the first time.  You’re surprised.  It was only a few weeks ago, and you were in a broom closet. That has to be different, right? (Well, not really, you’ll learn.)

game over @9uk

summary: your boyfriend has been gaming all day without paying much attention to you. that is until his friends on discord brings up the moaning noises in the background.

you’re my kryptonite @dovechim

summary: Superheroes are immortal, they are everything we are not. The Krypton are a race of superhumans sent down to Earth to protect humans, and they are the epitome of nobility and protection. You have always believed in their immortal, God-like powers, revered and admired them your entire life. Your wish for your very own superhero is granted when you meet Jung Hoseok, a Krypton with the most unique, powerful abilities you’ve ever seen.

Namjoon

first, do no harm @yandere-society

summary: Dr. Kim is well known as the most skilled heart surgeon in the hospital, but when you notice his mortality statistics seem skewered, you discover all is not what it seems. Now, Dr. Kim is offering you a choice: will you join him? Or become yet another broken heart beneath his scalpel?

internet friends [SMAU] @bts-celestials​

summary: meeting through online, namjoon slowly starts to fall for the person who likes all the things he’s into. maybe having friends online is fun.

Jimin

reset @dovechim

summary: We are made of the pieces of what we remember, and we hold in ourselves the hopes and fears of those who love us. As long as there are memories to call our own, there can be no true loss. But Park Jimin has no such privilege.

paparazzi (tw: flash banner) @chinkbihh​

summary: What if the roles were reversed and it was Jimin who was the fan and you who was the idol?  But what if he wasn’t just a casual fan, but an avid fan?  Maybe even a sasaeng…  

Taehyung

the morning after @softlyjiminie

summary: one night, full of passion, whispered promises and heated kisses. one morning, full of regret and unwanted memories. is a night with your ex enough to send you running back into the arms of the devil?

fake love @mygsii

summary: an arranged marriage between you and taehyung leaves behind feelings of bitterness and hatred. will your heart be able to survive, especially when you’ve loved him all your life, or will it fall apart with this marriage?

cheap skate @gukslut

summary: Who doesn’t know Taehyung and his lady? Cutest couple in town, I’d say, and have been since they started dating in their college days. Oh, that was a while ago, though. And still, they’re happy as can be in that place they have together. Almost hate seeing one without the other, y’know, it’s like seeing just one testi- oh, right, I’m not supposed to talk like that. Anyhoo, I only say that because I saw Taehyung at a jewelry store the other day while I was buying my sweet Jiminie his presents. Maybe that boy’s finally gonna pop the question, but I do hope he’s got a good plan for it. Something sweet and romantic. Maybe I’ll find out after Jiminie gets back from that cabin he’s visiting.

baby i @jiminsfault

summary: a one night stand with a stranger leads to so much more than just great sex

Jungkook

only for love [SMAU] @lysjeon

summary: for almost four years it had been just him and sarang, and he had no plans on changing the life they had become accustomed to any time soon, but of course y/n has to come and shake his world.

one time in your room @ubemango

summary: There are papers to write, and virgins to daydream about. (You can think about Jeongguk’s dick later.)

piss off your parents @littlemisskookie

summary: In an effort to piss off your parents you move in with their worst nightmare- a boy with tattoos, a rock band, and an irresistible charm.

departure @nomnomsik

summary: As a flight attendant for Korean Air, you’re scheduled for a thirteen-hour flight to Japan. However, things get intimate between you and your partner and co-pilot, Jeon Jungkook, when he realizes Park Jimin, the famous idol from Korea, broads the plane and blatantly flirts with you.

curiosity @hobidreams

summary: when innocent jungkook comes to you with a not-so-innocent question… you decide it’s easier to just demonstrate.

inkling @gguksgalaxy

summary: Jungkook is your brother’s boyfriend’s co-worker, they own a tattoo and piercing parlour. In other words, he’s tall, gorgeous, has his passion literally etched into his skin, looks incredibly good in a man-bun, and is semi-unattainable for you. Why? Well…you’re not entirely sure but him ditching right after a very heated make-out session sure isn’t a good sign. His extremely poor mood the next week sure isn’t either, but the only way to fix it is to face the beast head-on. Right?

j’aime @baepop

summary: You’re the newest hire at a local café and head barista Jeon Jungkook takes you under his wing.

pop goes the cherry @1oserjk

summary: jungkook comes back home to find you visiting as well, all grown up — in more ways than one.

skirt chasers @1kook

summary: “Baggy clothes are in, but you wouldn’t know that, Miss I Draw Inspiration From Catholic School Girls.”

kiss it better @jincherie

summary: When one goes to Kim Seokjin for advice, it’s almost guaranteed to never end well. This is something Jungkook learns quickly when he mistakenly follows treasured advice to ‘be smart’ and ‘use his assets’. He just did what he was told! Of course, the execution was a bit poor… and embarrassing. But hey, if rocking up to cheer practice in a skirt doesn’t woo your crush, what will?

pay by play @yoonia

camboy!au

deeply poisoned @xmagicxshopx

summary: Kiss me on the lips, a secret just between the two of us. Deeply poisoned by the jail of you. I cannot worship anyone but you and I knew the grail was poisoned but I drank it anyway.

speeding ticket @minstrophywife

summary: Caught speeding to get home in time, you find yourself pulled over by a very delicious cop. Perhaps you can talk your way out of the ticket.Or,“I’m afraid I’m going to have to do a cavity search ma’am.”

OT7/Multiple Members

buttercream @minniepetals

summary: you were always adorable in their eyes, sometimes a little too adorable.

dulce periculum @forgottenpasta

summary: Devious and devilish, your two new impish hybrids never miss a chance to torment you for your hopeless attraction to them, knowing exactly what they do to you. But is sly sexuality and enigmatic allure all there is to the tiger and wolf hybrid, or do the depths of their eyes hide something more for you? Part ½

tropicana @dragunjk

summary: groovy punch sippin

amaranthine @koyamuses

summary: As the sole owner of Nightshade, a quaint bed and breakfast on the outskirts of the city, you find pleasure in rising each morning to tend to your guests but behind closed doors and within the shadows, you are the covenant leader to a group of young vampires who have claimed you as their mate.More often than not, your day is brimming with a mix of daily chores and back door deals that ensure the survival of your covenant. However, everything changes when three werewolves come stumbling into your life, all three of them claiming it was your scent that drew them closer as the words true mate ring into the silence.

testosterone boys @kiwiscript

summary: A little end of the year party tradition gets taken too far.

operation love letters @ve1vetyoongi

summary: When every student on campus is going crazy about a survey that claims to make true love bloom, your best friend manages to convince you to join in on the fun — except you’re disappointed to find out that your results just seem to be lost causes. That is until a love letter from a mysterious secret admirer turns up and you find yourself on a mission to find the person behind the pen — but you quickly realise it’s going to be a lot harder than you initially thought when you have 7 possible bachelors to investigate, right? Operation: Love Letters a-go!

our princess @iridescentjin

summary: In your newly established poly relationship, you are intimate with both Taehyung and Seokjin at the same time for the first time.

[henryobsessed]

The Veterinarian and the Werewolf - Chapter 1

Summary: Jessie has completed Veterinarian school, after the death of her aunt has moved back to her home town.

word Count: 2013

A/N hello How are you all doing? we are in lockdown again here in Victoria Australia, I hope that means more time to write :)

Prologue

Chapter 1

Jessie sank into her plush foe leather couch; it had been a month since she had returned to her hometown and surprisingly her business was thriving. Even though she had yet to treat any wildlife she had a steady stream of cats, dogs, birds, ferrets, and other assortments of domestic animals heading through her doors. A big surprise to her was the number of cattle ranchers who on her arrival had asked her to make house calls to assess their cattle. Normally they paid for someone to come out to their co-op from the neighbouring bigger city. Now she was here if she could gain their trust, she would be set.

She looked around at her aunt’s old house, so many beautiful memories, Bet had been her best friend apart from the animals and had encouraged her to follow her dreams, she had even pitched in to her college fund when her parents’ life insurances had not been quite enough. She pictured her aunt standing at the stove, cooking her pancakes, grey hair piled atop her head, apron wrapped around her tall slender body, excited to cook for “The Vet” as she had lovingly called her even before she started her degree.

The last time they had spent time together she had sat on the couch, pancakes in hand. Her honey brown eyes pinning Jessie to her seat as her age roughened voice pleaded, “You can’t keep shutting people out Jessie, you have to open yourself to the possibility that you might find love, or even a good friend. You’re an adult now, and I won’t be around forever.” Her eyes misting as she whispered, “I worry about you honey, I don’t want you living your life alone like I did.”

Jessie had hugged her aunt pulling her in tight as she felt her sweet Bet’s distress. She had never asked why she was on her own, caught up in her own dramas. She had loved that it was just the two of them. But now she wondered if she had been too selfish. Once she was at college, her aunt was alone again. As if validating her aunt’s concern’s, she had received a call, a week after returning back to her last month of college. Her Aunt had suffered a major heart attack at work. Even though she was in the hospital when it had occurred, they were unable to save her. It had been a hard few months no one had come by the house for the funeral, it had just been the two of them. The local lawyer had encouraged her to sell up and move to a more populated area saying they had no need for a vet, and she had considered it. But a part of her still felt connected to the land, connected to those buried deep within the woods around their house.

He phone buzzed bringing her out of her musings, shaking the tired fog from her head she peeked at the antique gold clock above the mantel 11pm, Picking up the phone she heard a timid voice answer “Is this the vet, the one that came to our ranch last week?” mind pulled into action she answered “ yes this is the Vet what can I do for you?” a shaky breath let out as the young man responded, “I’m sorry for calling so late, My name is Thomas, my dad owns Ride em ranch. I was out checking traps around the property line, I hate them so much but dad insists we have them, a wolf has been caught. If I don’t get him out of here soon my Dad or one of the hands will come and kill him. Please what do I do?” sitting up Jessie talked in a calm voice to the boy, “First thing how is the wolf behaving?” getting up Jessie pulled her coat on whilst heading for the car, “He’s growling and whimpering at the same time ma’am, I think he would bite me if I got to close, but I can see he is in a lot of pain.” Opening the door to her pickup she jumped in glad her veterinarian bag was already in the back. “Ok Thomas tell me where you are, I am on my way”

Jessie was focused looking for the a boy in a red checked shirt and dark blue jeans, a part of her was excited, she was finally able to help a wolf, but another part of her was worried she was too late. There waving his arms illuminated by the high beams of her truck she saw Thomas, he had blond hair, brown eyes, and stood around 6 ft 3 although he had not filled out yes so even with his height looked like a young man.

Pulling up she could see his obvious fretting as he didn’t stop to talk but rather, as soon as she had her bag, started moving back into the forest. The boy was so intent on getting her there he didn’t say a word, however the closer they got the more evident it was the animal was in great distress. Long lone howls could be heard along with whimpers, when Thomas broke into the area where the wolf was his whimpers changed to savage snapping of his teeth and loud growls interrupted by his whines. The was until Jessie stepped into the opening, She could have sworn the wolf looked right at her with shock before it laid its head down and quietened. Jessie was amazed, its behaviour was one of submission and in its current state was highly unusual. She walked closer, slowly talking to the animal, “Hey boy, your ok, I’m here to help ok. Will you let me help you?”

She knelt just outside of the range where the wolf could reach her and reached into the bag, the majestic creature watched her closely but gone was the snarls and defensive growling. All that was left was his pain filled whimper, quickly assessing his weight she pulled a small tranquilizer gun out along with some prefilled darts. On seeing the gun he let out a long mournful howl that tore at her heart, “I’m sorry, but this will make you feel better I promise.” Taking aim she shot into his flank. He let out a soft yelp, they kept eye contact as he slowly lowered his eye lids.

Ok Thomas we need to move fast, I had to guess his weight and even though I am sure I’ve have put him out for the night I can’t guarantee that.” Together they moved to the brown black creature, jessie made note as they together removed the trap from its leg that the creature had seen better days. His hair was matted in places and there were other areas where the fur was missing showing signs of fights that it had been in. Carefully after assessing the rest of its body, Thomas and Jessie lifted the creature which from tail to muzzle would have been 6 ft 5 however it showed malnutrition and was much lighter that she would have expected for a creature of its size and age. In fact had Thomas not been there to help she would have been able to lift the wolf herself which said a lot for its condition. Sadness filled her as they carefully placed it in the back of the truck. Once he was securely placed in the back she turned to the young man “Thank you Thomas, I appreciate your help and your kindness” Thomas looked down at his feet for a moment before signing, “Please don’t tell my pa, he would think I was a pansy for doing this. What he fails to understand is we need to work with the wolves without them….. well we need them. Thank you for coming, I hope he survives.”

Jessie watched the tall young man in her rear vision as she dove away, there was something special about him.

On reaching her clinic she bought out a trolley and carefully picked up the wolf playing him down and wheeled him into the treatment rooms. Her first priority was x-ray the leg and make sure it wasn’t broken, as she moved around the room her other patients called out to her. A small Tibetan spaniel who was in for cherry eye surgery whimpered at her before settling down in it’s cage, along with a tabby who was recovering from a broken leg, who at all the noise hissed at her. “ohh come now calm down, we have to help this poor creature ok. I expect you both to keep him company as he recovers.” She quickly took the x-rays dismayed to see that the trap had indeed crushed his ulna and radius on the right leg. The night was long as she reset the leg and applied a cast. The sun was coming up, and her young assistant joe was walking in the front door as she finished setting the wolf up in a special cage.

Joe taken aback walked around to peer into the cage, “OMG Jessie, where did you find this boy? He is gorgeous and yet has seen better days.” Exhausted she just stood wiping her hands on her apron and started cleaning, “you look like you need a break Jessie, why don’t you go home, I’ll reschedule your non important appointments and push the urgent ones back to this afternoon so you can get some sleep.” Grateful she nodded her thanks and left the Joe to care for the grumpy cat, and Tibbey.

Jessie’s dreams were plagued with images of the wolf, his eyes that held so much pain caused her heart to constrict. The resemblance to the those she had buried so many years ago could not have been a coincidence. As she tossed and turned the images grew bolder, the wolfs from long ago circled her, she felt no fear only curiousness as they sniffed at her before one by one they laid at her feet. She knelt and stroked each one, reassuring them that she would take care of him. A loud sound broke into the now peaceful dream, her mind now fussy she picked up the phone, “Jessie” the frantic voice of her assistant invaded her calm “Jessie you have to get down here, the wolf woke up and is tearing at the cage. I can’t even get close enough to change the fluid bag. I’m scared he is going to break out.” Jumping out of bed she ran to grab her bag, not even worried that she was still in her pajamas she ran to her truck. The clinic was only 5 mins by car, but she was the only one authorised to use the tranqu gun.

Running into the clinic she could hear the panicked snarls and snaps of the wolf, the sound of the metal clanging and it tried to escape. Gun in hand she ran into the room, as Joe opened the door and her eyes met that of the wolf the strangest thing happened. Just as it had in the forest, the wolf calmed, whined and laid its head down. “well I never!!” Joe breathed in exasperation, “Teach me Obi wan, Tell me your secrets” if she hadn’t been so socked herself she would have laughed at Joe’s comment. However this was not normal wolf behaviour. Taking a risk she moved forward and sat before the creature, an odd feeling settling in her stomach as joe handed her the new bag. Talking in a calm voice she addressed the canine, “This will help you feel better ok” his eyes locked with hers as he whimpered. Risking everything she hooked up the new bag then opened the cage, going against her training she reached in and caressed him. She felt his body relax the more she stroked his neck and flank until he was once again asleep. Replacing the latch on the door she looked back a Joe both confused and amazed.

Chapter 2

I have tagged people from my last story if you wish to be removed please let me know 😊

@legendarywizarddetective @blakerogue @ladamari68 @witcherfan @sillyrabbit81 @littlefreya

@stephartrave @angelcavill66 @fatefuldestinies @bageracat

​@fortheloveoftradition @kmuir1 @fanfictionaddiction99 @zealoushound @thenonrealloser @xobriellaxo24 @jessayw

@abschaffer2 @elena-myth @shy-violet-soul @hisnamewasmojito @tumblrninia @thereisa8ella@cavilladdict @its–fandom–darling @omgkatinka @leaena2go@littlefreya @elena-myth @bluedog63 @oh-for-fic-sake @legendarywizarddetective @foodieforthoughts @lady-love88 @ladamari68 @elena-myth @viking-raider @hisnamewasmojito @its–fandom–darling @fysaelys @zurcda @allthingsatlanta13 @bageracat @cecilegoestoparis

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@f4iryerin @amberangel112 @silllyrabbit81 @crippledcatlady @multifandomlover1 @confusednerd09 @sycochick @littlefreya @absolutepie @jajphcfan @mandolover86 @ladamari68 @whereismymindlaura @antepatch @fanficforfun @thereisa8ella @davidbuddbg @ethandaddyramseyx@gayathriiii @nemessisvoninpirian@kath94210 @ladamari68@fancysthings @awallflowerstream @oddduckthatgirl@mcz02057 @gmfbaby @meanerface@adorable-hen @hrrypinks @melaniqueen2 @f4iryerin​ @biancawlf@tayxbri @whip111stuff​@kellynkeskoski @mzchievous-blog @pixie88 @marytudorbrandon @wolfsmom1 @amberangel112 @marantha

[nbrook29]

💞 My ultimate Sobbe fic recs 💞

Recently, I have gone through Robbe/Sander tag on ao3 and I decided to compose a list of fics that are absolute gems for me. A few disclaimers first:

✔ I didn’t include works in progress (WIPs), however I did include fics that are only on tumblr

✔ the order of the fics below is random

✔ this is the list of my personal favorites so if your favorite fic is not on the list it doesn’t mean it’s bad or that I consider it bad - we just vibe with different things :)

✔ if there’s a fic on this list that you decided to give a shot and loved it, please remember about leaving a comment under it to let the author know that

✔ I’ve been trying to add the “read more” thingy but it doesn’t show, I’m sorry, I know long posts are annoying af

under 1k

we’re keeping it simple by noobishere | G

Summary: Sander comes over unannounced and attacks Robbe’s very person (a.k.a the one where Sander teases Robbe on Eenvoud)

This is a guaranteed mood lifter. It’s short, sweet, to the point, and oh so funny. The banter. And I’d die to see that in the show. 

1k - 5k

Fizzy Colas by Foxsake5 | M

Summary: Let’s say this is a clip (hopefully not as short as the standard 1:40 of this season) with Sander as the main on a ‘bros night out’ 🍻

This author is my queen/king alright? They take a simple idea and turn it into the most lovely/cute/soft story. This fic is exactly that. Sobbe’s chemistry here is out of this world and the banter is to die for.

high for this by flowersmaze (@bowieskam) | G

Summary: In which Sander remains a Flirt™ and in love with Robbe even when he can’t feel his face after a medical procedure

The summary says it all. Loopy Sander is the cutest and funniest thing.

Pull Me from the Dark by TheOceanIsMyInkwell (@theoceanismyinkwell) | T

Summary: Sander discovers that Robbe has recently been prescribed antidepressants, and Robbe opens up to him about the night he almost stepped off the bridge. Only love will show how much they’ve grown and pull them through.

This time, the boys talk about Robbe’s mental state which is unusual in fics. This oneshot is communication 101. And this line is just 👌🏻 “But after the dust of their first kiss and their first vows of commitment settled around them, Robbe took a look at the space in which he floated and realized, somewhere along the line, that finding the love of your life doesn’t fix you.”

diminuendo by noobishere

Summary: Waking up feels like an ordeal. His eyes are heavy, arms a dead weight, he isn’t sure if his limbs are even in the right places, but eventually, Sander comes to. (a.k.a a take on how Sander fairs after Robbe left for school.)

Sander’s POV after Dinsdag 7:27. It’s a great insight into his headspace during that time. This could be a scene in the show because it fits so well.

you’re wonder under summer sky by nothingbutniall | M

Summary: Two city boys go camping. What could go wrong? (Everything, apparently.)

Those boys are a chaotic mess okay? They’re such dorks. This fic has the best kind of grumpiness there is and sobbe is written so in character here.

if we can make it through december (maybe we’ll make it through forever) by nothingbutniall | G

Summary: Robbe and Sander at the Christmas market.

Can you imagine those two dorks at the Christmas market? Well you don’t have to anymore because this fic is everything you need and more. And this line “Couldn’t,” Sander sulks. “You can’t hold hands properly with mittens on.” makes me go all gooey inside every.single.time 😍

A New Sunday Feeling by Foxsake5 | M

Summary:  Sander before Robbe: Ugh, Sundays 😒 Sander after Robbe: 😏🥺🥰

The way this author writes sobbe’s intimate moments is just pure talent. They have such way with words.

memories painted with much brighter ink by nothingbutniall | G

Summary: Saint Nicholas is the perfect excuse for an evening of gifts and banter with the flatshare. (Basically all five of them being cute together, and then Robbe and Sander being cute with just the two of them.)

This is the perfect fic for an October evening, when Christmas is just around the corner and you’ve just made yourself a cup of coffee and want to read some heart-warming well-written christmassy fluff. 

5k - 10k

Let’s Dance by msleviss (@sander-driesen) | G

Summary: Robbe and his friends go to a club to check out Amber’s DJ cousin.

THIS PERSON PREDICTED DJ SANDER Y’ALL. And Robbe thirsts over him. And there is an instant connection. And Robbe dances. And it’s so cute.

video phone by tokyometropolis (@luludemauryyy) | E

Summary: AKA OH MY GOD, THEY WERE QUARANTINED…except not together, because life is cruel. Thankfully it’s 2020 and when Robbe has an…er…intense dream about Sander in the middle of the night, all he has to do is press one button and Facetime him about it. Thing is…sometimes FaceTiming isn’t enough.

Look. I get that smut fics are not everyone’s cup of tea. And that’s totally fine. But. If you’re looking for a well-written smut that’s in character and where you can feel the love between the characters, this is it. Hands down. Sorry not sorry 💁🏼‍♀️

10k - 20k

our camp of dreams by robbesanderx (@robbesdriesen) | M

Summary: a summer camp!AU where robbe and sander are both co-counselors

Misunderstandings lead to pining. Teenage angst at its finest. I really like camp stories, it’s my thing.

Falling For You by silver_etoile (@azozzoni) | T

Summary: Robbe only knows one thing about football: that Sander Dreisen is the hottest player on the FC Utrecht team. When Jens drags him to a match, the last thing Robbe expects is to meet someone so perfect, and it’s all he can do not to mess it up, but will he succeed?

Sobbe in a different setting with a bit different dynamic yet still having that special something. It’s a nicely written story of the development of their relationship, first meeting, falling in love, ups and down, all the best things in fics. And Sander as a soccer player is a pretty 🔥 concept (and I think Robbe agrees).

This isn’t our first time around by noobishere | E

Summary: One moment they are in the kitchen of their shared apartment, the next, they’re in this strange but familiar room.(a.k.a the au in which they accidentally go hopping through multiple universes)

The universe takes matters into their own hands and shows those silly boys that they are meant to be. Sign me up for the ride.

Coffee and Croques by peaceoutofthepieces (@peaceoutofthepieces) | G

Summary: Sander works at the on-campus coffee shop with Eliott, and he might just have a crush on the cute boy in the brown coat.

I’m a sucker for coffeshop fics. There is just something so good about them. This one is the coffeshop!AU that sobbe deserves. Oh the pining, and the secretive looks, the silly boys, and a pinch of Elu. Me likey ☕

The finest of the meadow by allforyoumylove | M

Summary: The universe brings two lonely boys together in a flowering meadow. They fall for each other fast and hard among delicate daisies, warm summer breezes, and shooting stars.

This is magical. My comment on the work was “So soft, so beautiful, so THEM, ugh.” and I MEANT that. This is just the right amount of sweetness. This is a must read. I’m not messing around. 

two side of the same coin series by MajorAccent (@acespaceacepilot) | E

Summary: the valleys and mountains of sander’s bpd

How the boys handle Sander’s ups and downs. Robbe being the best boyfriend ever. I love how good he is for Sander, being there for him, not treating him like a baby, and not controlling him. How much he tries to make it at least a little bit easier for him. If you don’t want to read explicit stories, at least give the first part a try since it’s not E rated. 

Zaterdag 9:58 by Foxsake5 | M

Summary: What happened after the croissants dropped to the floor 🥐🤭💕

I meant it when I said Foxsake5 has great way with words. Every single piece of theirs is just “chef’s kiss”. This fic is a definition of a domestic fic. Oh, and it happened. Totally. It’s my headcanon now.

its an unrequited love by eggsntoast | G

Summary: Sander works part-time at a museum every Sunday. Robbe is a frequent visitor.

A Sander POV fic. I was sold from the beginning. The development of their relationship here is so cute, and they’re being so stupid with their pining instead of just talking to each other and you just want to shake them but at the same time you’re rooting for them so hard. Oh and did I mention pining?

20k+

Jij Verliest series by ravenbrenna09 (@djsander) | M

Summary: For the past three months, Robbe’s life—and what it once was—had been stripped away and rearranged. Now, if anything, his life had become a bit repetitive: homework, stream, ignore Thomas’s Instagram, repeat. But one Friday evening, Robbe meets a hurricane in the form of a platinum-haired tattoo artist who just might show him everything that he’s been missing.

This is a long series okay? But oh so worth it. It’s captivating and you don’t want to stop until you finish. And once you finish you’re sad it’s over even though you’ve just spent 8 fucking hours reading it. It’s amazing. But you probably know that because it’s quite popular (rightfully so). The best thing is that you expect it to go bad halfway through because it’s difficult to keep the quality on the same level in a fic that long. But it doesn’t.

Visitations by lucidpantone (@lucidpantone) | E

Summary: Does Robbe and Sander’s relationship survive into adulthood. This fic takes place in two simultaneously timelines: the past and the present.The present occurs in one entire day. Both timelines are completely out of chronological order. Everything is in clips.You can be dropped in at anytime of the day in any timeline. So clip by clip you will need to piece together what happen to Sander & Robbe and why the present looks the way it does and what happened in the past that got them there.This love story is a journey. So be prepared.In the words of one of our Even’s. It’s a complicated love story between complicated people.

This is not a regular fic. The author put so much thought into it, there are so many gems, so many little things that you have to pay attention to because it.all.matters. And there is not one interpretation. Don’t you just love when a story forces you to think and use your brain? Cause I do. Not gonna lie: this story hurts, and like the author says themselves, it’s a journey. But oh my god get in because it’s amazing. And the ending is just sjsjsjsjsddhdhsdsgdsg 🤯

the night we met by themoongirl (@dearsander) | T

Summary: Robbe Ijzermans has a brain that won’t let him sleep, a chest that feels far too heavy and thoughts that never stop.During his first year of college he meets Sander Driesen. Robbe finds what he never went looking for.

A college AU. This fic is a journey of pain and fluff and humor. It has awesome friendships. And sobbe falling in love. And liminal spaces. I read it a while ago so I don’t remember it as well as the others but you know what? I still remember that it was great and I’m lowkey happy I don’t remember it that well because now I can go and read it again. 

The Stars Look Very Different by @peaceoutofthepieces 

Summary: Robbe is bored. He’s bored of listening to his friends talking about girls, and his other friends making out, and no one ever doing anything. He’s tired of having to put in all the work, of making his own fun. He’s tired of feeling nothing so he doesn’t have to feel like nothing. His party stunts are pushing the limit, his thrill seeking beginning to worry even his friends, and his carelessness is toeing the line of dangerous.

He’s a little tired of being ‘dangerous’, too.

Sander may or may not have a crush on the older boy with the apparent death wish. He wouldn’t mind a little danger.

Once I started reading this fic, each day I was waiting for an update at the edge of my seat which was a feeling I expected from s4 that did not deliver. TSLVD definitely delivered. My favorite sobbe social media AU

Ziggy Stardust Series by skamsnake (@skamsnake) | M/E

A collection of fics taking place throughout the season. Most of them are E rated so be aware of that but it’s a really cool mixture of fluff and spice *fans myself*

[vale-studies-ir]

Hello lovely people!

It seems that life made me take a leave of absence from tumblr. Thanks to all of you who have continued to interact with my page! I'm sorry if I've missed any messages or questions in the time that I've been away. I'm back now and I'll continue to share my journey with you all...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In order to be able to keep moving forward, I think it's important to accept the past and move on. Accept any of the difficulties that happened, and see them as moments you've gone through that have made you stronger. My way of accepting and turning over a new page will be through this post.

I haven't shared too much information about my studies and how they've been going. My studyblr was very new, and I was using it more as a means for motivation by seeing all the wonderful things people in the community were doing. Little by little, I started to make posts of my own.

So let me formally introduce myself and share my ongoing journey...

My name is Valentina, I go by Vale for short. I jumped from graduating from my BA in International Relations and Political Science in the Spring of 2018 to starting my PhD studies in International Relations the Fall semester of that same year. No break, very smart... I know. That's only just the beginning. I'm not sure how it works abroad, but here doctoral students usually go through most of their studies being funded by a graduate assistantship. This pays tuition and provides a stipend through working as a TA (graduate teaching assistant). Of course they vary across universities and departments. When I was applying to the PhD program, one of my professors advised me not to accept if I was not given funding. There are only a limited number of spots that are given to incoming students each year that will be accepted as a TA.

In March of 2018 I received notification that I was accepted into the PhD program in International Relations at my university, however, the department could not guarantee funding for me. This put me at a loss, and I spend months wondering where this was going and what I would do. Because I'm an immigrant in the US, though I've been living here practically my whole life, I didn't have too many options. My mobility is constrained.. my access to scholarships is constrained (even though I may qualify for them in terms of academics and merit, migration status trumps over all of it). I was lost, to say the least. My family can't afford to have paid for this program or a Master's program out of pocket, and I am not able to take out student loans even if I wanted to.

Regardless of this all, I still attended the incoming graduate student orientation; which surprised the outgoing graduate program director. She did not think I would show up, considering the whole funding predicament. She and the new GPD told me that they would try to find something for me. On the first day of class, I showed up, still not knowing what would become of this situation. Not knowing if I would actually get to start the semester or not. We are usually given a week to pay tuition - because of status, I am considered an international student so my tuition came out to nearly $10,000 for three courses. That day, out of nowhere, I was told that the dean of our school (School of International and Public Affairs) was looking for a graduate assistant for new projects that he wanted to work on. In the span of a few hours, I ended up interviewing with him, being told that they would let me know because there was another student they were considering, and later being called and told that I got the position. I was ecstatic. I called my parents in tears. This was actually happening; I was actually going to be able to start my PhD.

It all happened so fast. It all seemed so exciting. The dean seemed very enthusiastic and pleased that I would be working with him. Things eventually took a turn for the worst...

Transitioning into graduate school itself is extremely difficult. Many graduate students find themselves experiencing heightened stress and strain on their mental health. I did not give myself the space to transition into graduate school without the added stress of being a doctoral student, without the added expectations. On top of that, the dean had not had a graduate assistant before. This was new for him too. The expectations of me were blurred and my contract would only last for a year to be considered for possible renewal (the typical TA contract in my original department lasts 4 years), this led to disaster. I needed this position to continue to fund my studies, so I needed to make sure that I was on top of my work expectations. Because these expectations were unclear, the dean's secretary took advantage. It seems they were short staffed, and I was given administrative tasks that did not belong to me. I was made to come in to the office for strictly 20 hours a week. (Our contract states that we work up to 20 hours a week). If I was ever sick and missed a day, that would be added onto the hours for the next week. So if I missed a day where I was supposed to be in the office for 5 hours, I'd have to be there for 25 hours the following week. A breach in the contract, I know - but who was I, a lowly student, against the dean? This office (a shared space) was not a place where a person could focus on studying. There were students coming in and out, loud conversations occurring, and having to see if the actual student employee in charge of taking phone calls was at their desk - if not, I would have to man the phone. While I was doing administrative tasks for the dean's secretary, the dean was having me create themed presentations and CO-LECTURE with him. Me, a person who had been an undergraduate student only months earlier. I had to create these presentations from scratch and know all of the material. All of my focus had to be on this. My performance in my own classes and mental health declined quickly. I could not focus, I could not get my reading assignments done, I felt unprepared. I felt like a failure.

After a year, I realized that it was not worth to have my tuition paid for if I could not focus on my classes and was set up for failure. It took a lot, but ultimately I turned down the contract renewal. Here comes the fun part. My GPA dropped tremendously. I graduated Magna Cume Laude just a year before. I developed depression and didn't realize it; to the point where a friend practically made me go to counseling. The office manager at my actual department knew what I was going through. I had shared a lot of my experience with her. She advocated for me. Because of this, I was told that there was a student who had been awarded an assistantship for the incoming Fall 2019 semester, but had decided not to take it. The contract was going to be made for me instead, for not 4 but for 5 years since I had only come in with a BA degree. When they ran it through the associate dean's office... it was denied. My GPA was lower than the threshold. A LOT lower. I was told by the GPD - the same woman who had just started her position that said she would help me, the woman that had gone on maternity leave during that whole year after she started meaning she was not aware of the situation - that I should really take my studies more seriously. She received a very long email from me and apologized afterwards, to say the least. Nothing could be done.

I had no funding, only savings and ended up working Full Time in Fall of 2019 in order to try to pay for 1 course, that costed me a little over $3,000. Somehow, even though I strongly considered it, I managed not to drop out. By this time, the majority of the courses I had taken before had INs - incomplete grades. Two of them had automatically turned into Fs. Things were not okay.

I got a bit of a mental break during that Fall semester. I worked in a friendly environment. The office manager pulled some strings and let me work as an office assistant there... so I was still at my department, but working as staff. It was a little awkward. I'm eternally grateful to her, she became a close friend. And because of her, someone at another department got word that there was a graduate student who needed funding.

This office manager was good friends with a recently graduated phd student from our department who is now working for a different center in the university. Because she was part of my department, many of my current colleagues know her, and are good friends with her. We spoke, I rushed to get my GPA up to the 3.0 threshold and with the help of my professor's I was able to be awarded an assistantship with that center. I started in December of 2019.

Again, I was ecstatic. Things were looking up. When I went in for the first time, I immediately felt a huge difference. It was a smaller, more homey place; and a lovely environment to be in. The people there were sweet and caring. I've gotten along with the few professors I've had the chance of meeting and working with.

Where did it start going downhill? The professor that recommended me (graduate from my home department) continuously requested that I work with her. Her reason being that I got along better with her (something that I was not aware of). Because she considered herself as my friend, professional lines were horribly blurred. I found myself doing additional work for her as a "favor for a friend." She then started having us meet multiple times a week for hours - distracting from the time I needed to actually get work done. This center does not cap classes - I've had to grade for up to 400 students in one semester. The meetings she scheduled were incredibly unproductive, and I found myself having to take extra time to get the grading done. Again, my own studies were effected. The past academic year went on like this. I ended up assisting in creating a new course and new assignments from scratch.

Later I noticed that something was wrong. I was doing way more work than stipulated by my contract. She was giving me access to her courses that I was not assigned to grade for. Instead of assisting for one course in the semester (the one with the highest enrollment), I was assisting for three. This was constantly under the guise of 'friendship'. How was I supposed to reject my 'friend'? When I tried to draw professional boundaries, I was met with resistance.

My mental health declined again in the fall and I missed a few of her scheduled meetings (meetings which she said were NOT mandatory). Because of this, she decided to throw me under the bus with the director and making it seem as if I was not actually working - when I was addressing students' needs and getting grades in. This worsened in the Spring. With the help of my counselor I finally got the courage to communicate with her. Albeit through text, because she's the type of person that does not allow you to get a word in during conversation.

"On that note, there’s something I’ve wanted to talk about. I’ve been struggling with concentration and fatigue. This is something that I’ve been working on with my doctor to try to find solutions. I’ve noticed that being in Zoom meetings in general where there’s casual conversation makes it exceptionally difficult for me to focus on what I’m trying to get done. This has been problematic in the work zoom meetings. You probably have noticed I seem really quiet, that is because I’m trying my hardest to focus.

I need to be able to focus during the time I’m assigned to work as a GA. Otherwise, I must take more time to complete tasks that normally wouldn’t take up that long or just wait until the weekends to finish them. That is conflicting as I have set that time to work on class assignments and my own projects. So in the end I end up falling behind and not working well because my productivity levels are being affected."

She seemed to understand me and be supportive. Then I noticed coldness, and condescending passive aggressive texts from her part.

I realized that I could not do this any longer. I could not allow myself to continuously be taken advantage of. Both of the people I've worked for were aware of my vulnerable situation due to migration status. They both knew that it was not easy for me to pay for my studies through any other means. My studies depended on these people, and if they 'liked' me. They abused and absorbed my time to the extent that my studies suffered tremendously.

But I finally stood up for myself. I spoke with the director and she affirmed that my concerns were valid. Time and time again she assured me that my studies should always come first. She supported me. I will no longer be assigned to work with this person.

I finally feel heard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's been 3 years since I started my program. A lot has happened in this time. I have a lot of catching up to do this summer if I want to stay on track and take my comprehensive exams by the end of the year. But someone finally heard me, acknowledged the wrongdoings and helped me.

Don't let people walk over you and take advantage of you. I'm learning this the hard way.

Speak your truth.

[xxkellsvixen19xx]

Spotlight: A Life Of A Troubled Celebrity Heartthrob Ch 3

Word Count 5,033

The first leg of the tour in the USA and Canada was complete and the next stop was Europe. Y/N had avoided Colson as much as possible and they had one or two brief run-ins but there were always people around. She had stayed at the penthouse with the others until they left for London.

So many times he had tried to call her, to talk to her, to try and get her attention but he always got cold feet. He had tried to get Jax to go and speak to her on his behalf, threatened him even but Jax wouldn't budge.

"She's a good girl and you're not worthy of her yet.. Leave her be." Jax said, causing him to become more frustrated.

"I always get what I want and I want Y/N. I'm going to get her with or without your help." He vowed.

"Why do you want her Colson? So you can hurt her? To ruin her? Just to stroke your ego?" Jax challenged. "Why would you want to pursue her when you have no good intentions towards her? You know you will go back to your old ways once you get what you want from her and ruin her for the next guy!"

"She's different from all the other girls I've been with.. I don't know okay??! I know I can't be faithful but I just want her!" He pulled his hair in frustration. "It may be for selfish reasons but -"

"Then what Colson?! After you promised to keep your distance you do a 360 and your hormones are taking over as usual." Jax bellowed, as he came face to face with Colson.

Daring him to say the wrong thing. He was ready for anything at this point. He couldn't understand why Colson would want to ruin a sweet, innocent girl like Y/N. Colson would never change for her-for anyone for that matter. It would take a miracle for that to happen.

Colson stared at him with his icy blue eyes and walked towards the window. He couldn't explain it but he wanted Y/N like he never wanted anyone before. Maybe it was in the way she looked at him, her melodic laughter, her natural beauty or her child like innocence. He couldn't quite place his finger on it but all he knew was that he had to have her. He was tired of being with shallow-minded, pea-brained girls that just wanted him for his fame and fortune-for his body. Y/N was just content with cuddling and talking or just sitting in a comfortable silence. He had never been with a woman that just wanted him for just him. They always had some hidden agenda-their career, money, sex-but Y/N had never exploited their relationship for personal gain.

From the first time he laid his eyes on her something inside him shifted. He had offered to drive her home although he knew that Jax was waiting outside. She was a mystery to him and he wanted to spend more time with her to try and unravel it. He had made sure to keep the music low so that they could talk-once again in his life he wanted to just talk to another person with no hidden motives.

"So tell me about yourself Bambi?" He had asked with genuine interest.

"Ummm..there's nothing much to tell." She twisted her fingers on nervously in her lap. She was shy. He decided there and then he would help her to break her out of her shell. He wanted to know everything about her but the ride was so short. There wasn't enough time.

"Then tell me a little?" He urged on.

"I-I..I'm a student at-uh- Cleveland State University..and I-want to major in music." She stumbled over her words and it made her even more appealing to him. Her long lashes brushed her cheeks as she blinked rapidly.

"My Dad-he died..three years ago and I live with my Mom."She said out of breath.

"Sorry..about your Dad. Mine is as good as dead." He frowned deeply. "But-your Mom? She's cool?"

"Yes-she's the best." She still wouldn't look at him and he wanted her to. More than anything he wanted to look into those big brown eyes.

He had pulled up outside her house and as she made a jump out he thought quickly.

"Hey, smile." He said as he put up his phone and snapped a selfie. It took her completely by surprise and she looked like a frightened deer in the photo.

"Let's try again?" She relaxed slightly and the next photo was definitely a Kodak moment.

"Do I make you uncomfortable??" His hand tightened on the steering wheel as he stole a glance at her. She was standing outside the car and boring a hole into the ground with her eyes.

"Yes." She squeaked. .

"Then we're going to have to do something about that Bambi." He chuckled as he stepped on the accelerator and turned up the music. She was going to be a challenge and Colson Baker always loved a challenge.

"Byron." He spoke through the phone. "I've changed my mind..I need you to set up that thing with Y/F/N Y/L/N."

"Sure thing Colson. I'm on it." Byron replied.

"One more thing-as soon as we get to London, make sure Y/N and I live separately from the rest. You think you can manage that?" It was more like an order and not a question.

"Consider it done." Byron said.

"Thanks Byron." He cut the call and smiled to himself. His plan was starting to come together. Byron could convince an Eskimo to by an ice-machine. Y/N wouldn't be able to say no once he worked his magic on her.

Colson went to take a shower with a self-satisfied smirk on his face. He was Colson-fuckin'-Baker after all. No one could say no to him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When they arrived in London their luggage was taken care of as usual and they were ushered to the waiting limo. By this time everyone was suffering from a mixture jet-lag, exhaustion, hangover and a dash of homesickness.

"Hey guys! Great to see you again." Byron was waiting to meet them outside. "I see you're all tired and stuff so I've instructed the driver to take you straight to Eaton Place. You will be staying at that penthouse for the next three days-then we leave for Paris. However, Colson will not be joining you this time he will be living at an undisclosed location-for security reasons."

"Any questions? Great. Go home and rest guys tonight will be a busy night." He turned to face Y/J. "Miss Y/L/N, you have to come with me. We have that meeting remember? This way please."

"Oh yeah, sure." Y/N turned to Ashleigh. "I'll see you later."

"Good luck. Call me okay?" They embraced quickly before Y/N went after Byron.

Not wasting a single minute, Byron dove right into it as soon as the car started moving.

"Y/N, you already know what this is about right? We spoke about it before and also last night on the phone." Byron asked.

"Yes but I'm not sure it's a good idea.." She said skeptically.

"I don't want to insult you-but what if I threw in some money to make it worth your while? Name your price."

"What? No! What do you take me for?" She cried out.

"Okay. Okay. Calm down," He raised both his hands. "What about an internship and a guaranteed job at XX Entertainment once you graduate? Sounds good huh?"

"Byron, I don't want to feel like you've bought me..Whatever job or post I get, I want to earn it. Not to get it because.." She felt so dirty right now and insulted. Was Colson behind this? She couldn't help but wonder if he was the one that put Byron up to this.

"Okay let's do this your way." He sighed and massaged his temple. "What't it going to take for you to go along with our plan? If not money then..should I appeal to your humanity?"

"Look..it's fine I will help-"

"Yes!" He threw his fist in the air in triumph.

"But on my own terms." She said firmly.

"Whatever you want Y/N. Name it and it's yours." Byron looked at her earnestly.

"I will only agree to this if you will allow me to call it off anytime." She swallowed hard.

"What? What do you mean?" Byron asked, confused.

"If I feel it's becoming to much for me to handle then I will pull the plug on this..thing-anytime-without notice. Any questions? Great." She opened the door and jumped out without waiting for a response.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The penthouse One Hyde Park in London was were Colson and Y/N would be co-habitating. Only she wasn't aware of this yet. She thought they were just coming here for a meeting to finalize their "deal", although she didn't want anything out of it. The house was a contemporary and modern property, sitting on over an acre with a large garden, set back, screened and secluded with automatic solid sliding gates. It had a roof terrace and jacuzzi. 5 bedrooms that overlooked the garden, 4 bathrooms, 4 reception rooms. The servants quarters were on the first floor along with a stunning spiral wine cellar. The property had under floor-heating, surround sound and electronic sliding curtains.

"Wow!" Was all Y/N could say as she twirled around the house in awe. Jax showed her to her room and turned to leave.

"Wait...am I going to be staying here? Where's everyone else?" She asked.

"I'm sure Byron will fill you in soon." Jax responded.

"Oh." Her face fell.

"Don't worry about your luggage Miss Y/L/N. I will send someone with it shortly." Jax assured Y/N. "Welcome to Colson's humble abode."

She felt like Belle in Beauty and the Beast at this precise moment. Surrounded by so much luxury and yet she felt so unhappy. She kicked off her shoes and threw herself onto the bed, where she fell into a fitful sleep.

Meanwhile Colson was pacing up and down his bedroom floor, trying to think of how to approach Y/N. He had never had to make a move on a girl, it was always the other way round. He was clueless when it came to girls.

"Byron! Jax! Get in here." He hollered as he leaned over the banister.

They came up to his room promptly and sat on the chaise lounge waiting for him to speak first. He was in a plain white t-shirt and sweat pants but still looked like he stepped out of a magazine. He sat at the edge of the bed and looked on them.

"Byron, any progress with OGB?" They had labeled it Operation Get Bambi.

"She's on board." He pursed his lips into a thin line.

"But..? He raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow.

"She wants it on her own terms..which she will discuss with you. But she's taking a nap now." He bounced his knee.

"Cool. I can handle that." He pushed his hair back and let out a sigh of relief.

He never expected her to agree but then again Byron could be very persuasive. He wondered what Byron had offered her in exchange for her help. She never struck him as a girl that could be bought but maybe he was wrong-maybe everyone had a price. His heart sank the more he thought about it. She was probably just like the rest he thought.

"So why the long face? I thought you would be glad-" Byron stated.

"How much?" He gulped and stared at the floor, not meeting Byron's eyes.

"She doesn't want anything. I offered her-" Byron sat forward and tried to explain.

"What??" He looked up in surprise, his blue eyes startled.

"I could have offered her all the money in the world but she would have still turned me down." He said dryly.

"That's my girl!" Jax grinned widely as he clapped his hands dramatically.

"Shut up Jax." Colson scowled but inwardly he was just about to burst with happiness. So he was right about her after all. He didn't know why but, he felt relieved beyond comprehension.

"Now you can see that I was right about her." Jax shot back.

"Whatever-is everything set for the concert tonight? What time is sound check?" His heart was racing at the thought of seeing her again, that she was under the same roof, sound asleep in the next room.

"Yes but I'm about to head over to Wembley Stadium now to check if everything is in order..so if there's nothing else..?" He stood up and straightened his suit.

"Nah, that will be all." He said with a wave of his hand. "Jax you can stay."

"Still up for the after party?" Byron asked as he stood at the door. They always had one after every concert at a five star hotel, but only the who's who of show business in the city were invited. It was strictly by invitation.

"What else do I have to live for?" Colson rolled his eyes. "But I'll just make a brief appearance for an hour or so, I really need to rest."

"See you in a bit." Byron saluted and left.

"So what's your game plan?" Jax pursed his lips.

"I thought maybe you could help me with that?" For once he looked uncertain. Jax's heart melted.

"If and a big if- if we going to do this then you going to have to change Colson. Otherwise I won't be a part of it." Jax said with seriousness written all over his face.

"Yeah, yeah spare me the lecture Jax." He gave himself a face-palm.

"Don't you roll your eyes at me, I'm being very serious right now." Jax said.

"Jax nothing in life is guaranteed man. People make up to break up and so on. You need to chill out man." Colson replied.

"Look I'm not expecting you to marry Y/N, ride off into the sunset, have adorable twin babies and live happily ever after. But if you don't have good intentions then let's drop it. You can have any girl you want Colson. Young and old, short or tall, they're yours for the taking. Just don't go and ruin an innocent girl just for kicks. That's just plain downright cruel."

"Why do you care so much anyway?? You don't even know her man!" Colson burst out.

"That doesn't make it right. You know what forget it. I'm out." Jax stood up but Colson pulled him back.

"Listen Jax, don't get your knickers in a twist..I hear you man. Now let's discuss this like adults? How do I get my girl?" Colson cocked his head to the side and smiled.

"Thought you would never ask." Jaxs' face broke into a grin as he sat down again.

Y/N's phone was vibrating somewhere on the bed and she finally heard it.

"Hello." She said, half awake.

"Hi sweetie. Sorry did I wake you?" Mrs Y/M/L/N asked.

"Hi Mom," She propped a pillow behind her back, "Don't worry I'm awake now. Is everything okay?"

"Yes. I just miss you that's all." She said wistfully.

"I miss you too Mom." All of a sudden she broke down and started crying. She was overwhelmed by a cocktail of feelings right now and she couldn't keep the tears back any longer. Hearing her mother's voice made her homesick and emotional.

"Hey honey? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Ye-yes." She tried to compose herself. "I guess I'm just tired. Haven't slept properly you know.." She sniffled.

"I thought you were having a great time? Did something happen? Is it Colson?" Her mother rained questions Y/N couldn't quite answer herself.

"No-yes I am Mom. It's been great. Colson's been great Mom." She reached out for a Kleenex and wiped her face and nose. There was a soft knock on the door and she asked her mother to hold.

"Come in." Y/N called out and immediately regretted it. Well kind off..

"Hey-is this a bad time? You're crying? Why? Is it me? Did I do this??" He rushed to her side and held her at arms length.

"No-wait.." She held up a finger to her lips. "Mom, can I call you back? Colson is here."

"Put him on the phone. I need to have a word with him." She demanded. Y/N was sure Colson heard that and her fears were confirmed when he held out his hand for the phone. She looked at him hesitantly then handed it over to him with resigned sigh.

"Hi Mrs Y/M/L/N. Colson Baker here." He turned on the Baker charm and there was no female on planet earth that was immune to it, so far anyway.

"Oh hi there-um-Colson." Y/N imagined her Mom fluffing her hair like she usually did. She had already fallen for the trap.

"I just wanted to thank you personally for allowing Y/N to come on this tour. She is such a breath of fresh air. You raised her well." He smiled at Y/N as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Oh thank you Colson. You don't have to say that." Mrs Y/M/L/N gushed.

"Anyway we got to run now, I promised to take Y/N for lunch and I'm a man of my word." Y/N gasped and he turned his back on her to keep from laughing.

"Really?? You don't have to! Surely you're too busy for that?" She asked.

"Anything for my Bambi." He said sweetly.

"Awww you even have a cute pet name for her?? You know they used to call her that in kindergarten?" She laughed.

"Really?? Why don't you tell me all about it when we visit this weekend?" He turned to face Y/N, her mouth almost hit the ground.

"You're coming over? Y/N didn't say.."

"It was a surprise but now it's out there." He shrugged.

"Okay let me not keep you then. See you then." He rang off.

"Explain Baker." Y/N crossed her arms and pushed her tongue in her cheek.

"Can we eat first sweets? I'm starved." He said with exaggeration. "Can we call a truce? No more mind games. No more ping-pong with feelings and let's learn how to communicate okay?" He held out his hand and she shook it. He would have preferred them to seal it with a kiss but he didn't want to get ahead of himself.

"So we're good?" He asked.

"Yes." She said with a smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Colson was lying on his bed but for the life of him he couldn't fall asleep. It was 3:00 am. He had sang his heart out at the concert, stayed very briefly at the after party and tried to get drunk but failed. Women had tried to entice him but he just wasn't interested. He kept his eyes on his prize all night. He even got jealous when a dark-haired guy approached her and engaged her in conversation. She seemed taken with him-they laughed, they smiled and even flirted. The guy kept her entertained most of the night and he saw them dance a couple of times. Finally, when he couldn't take it anymore he walked over and cut in. After the dance he faked a headache and asked Y/N if they could go home.

"Bambi? Can I come in?" Colson knocked softly on the door and got no response. He had a serious case of insomnia and this was his only remedy. All the alcohol that he had didn't seem to do the trick, even some stronger stuff-he was wide awake.

Colson opened Y/N's door slowly and found her fast asleep on top of the covers, her long legs overlapping each other and her flat stomach exposed. She was in shorts and a sports bra, her smooth, milky skin glistening in the moonlight, her hair fanned all over her pillow and her face looked so serene. He sat on the edge of the bed and lightly traced his fingers across her stomach and then up to her face. If it were possible, he could sit here and just watch her sleep all night but she would freak out when she woke up and found him staring at her.

Common sense told him to leave the room but he found himself jumping on the bed and snuggling behind her. Taking in her scent, nuzzling her neck and just reveling in being close to her. She was completely out because she never once moved. He gave a contented sigh as he put his arms around her and fell asleep almost immediately..

Y/N woke up an hour later feeling thirsty and tried to move but she was firmly secured in a grip. She woke up with a start and turned to see Colson sleeping like a baby. Just watching him sleep made her heart melt into a puddle. Her hand reached out on its own accord, to stroke his hair and his beautiful face.

A smile lit her face as she reached out for the glass of water on the nightstand. Colson Baker was lying in her bed in his bare necessities. He was right here with her and not some floozy or flavor of the night. This was the stuff dreams were made of. Her heart fluttered as she took in the sight before her again as she assumed her position once more. Their bodies fit so perfectly together when they were like this, if only it could apply in every area of their relationship. That's if you could even call it that. But a girl could only hope...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Y/N!" Ashleigh barged into the room, "Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry-I didn't know-sorry!" She covered her face and quickly backed out. The said couple were deep in sleep and were oblivious to the intrusion, fortunately for Ashleigh.

"There is such a thing as knocking you know?" Jax stood at the foot of the stairs, with his hands behind his back, as she descended in a hurry.

"I didn't know-" She said, her face beet red.

"You should learn to expect the unexpected when it comes to those two." Jax said with a knowing look. He had learned that the hard way.

"I didn't expect them to be..you know..Gosh I wish I could unsee that!" She covered her face, trying to hide her embarrassment.

She didn't anticipate walking into Y/N's room to find her and Colson half-naked and glued to each others bodies. After all how could Y/N get with him after everything he had done to her? She just couldn't understand it. But then again this was Colson Baker and he was beyond irresistible. I mean who could say no to that hot body? If Ashleigh was in the same position then they definitely were not going to be sleeping.

"May I interest you in breakfast per chance?" Jax asked as he led her to the sitting room, drawing her out of her nasty thoughts. "What brings you here so early anyway?"

"It's way after 9 Jax." She flopped onto the couch. "I need to talk to Y/N..about something.."

"Well, you just have to wait or come back later?" Jax suggested. "When ever they sleep together they have been known to wake up way past noon..and we had a pretty late night coupled with the heavy hangover.." He perched on the armrest.

"What do you mean "when they sleep together?" She looked at him suspiciously.

"I think I've already said too much-breakfast?" He stood hastily and retreated to the kitchen.

"I think I'm going to go then!" She shouted after him and followed him to the kitchen.

"Slow your roll there little lady. I'm sure they will be up and about in no time." He said. "What would you like the chef to prepare for you?"

"An omelette and toast-he can be creative but I don't eat mushroom." She slid onto the stool by the kitchen island.

Y/N began to stir when she heard a murmuring of voices coming from downstairs. She tried to turn but Colson's arms-and legs were tightly wrapped around her. Why would anyone want to ever wake up from this, she thought as she tried to sleep again but Colson had other plans.

"Good morning sweets." He said, his voice still husky.

"Hey." She said nervously as his arms tightened around her waist

"I could get used to this." He buried his face into her hair and groaned.

"What? Waking up in someone else's bed?" She turned onto her back and faced him.

"Your bed you mean?" He smiled and pushed her messy hair back so he could look at her face. Never had he wanted the female specie as much as he wanted her right now. Never had he slept in a bed with a woman and just traded war stories. He knew that if he made a move she would comply but he couldn't. There was more to him agreeing to keep from jumping her bones but she was clueless, and he hoped it stayed that way until he had dealt with the issue. He would take that secret with him to the grave.

"No ping-pong remember?" She was saying to him. Maybe dreams do come true, she thought. Maybe he was really into her? But then again there was no telling with Colson Baker. He was just to complex and she didn't have the energy to try and figure him out.

"Yeah, yeah I get it but-I think we've already crossed that line Bambi.." He looked pointedly at their tangled limbs. Not to mention her undergarments left very little to the imagination. She looked at their entwined bodies and fell silent for a moment. They were in quite a predicament-it was clear as the light of day.

"Well..you decided to invite yourself into my bed Baker. After you promised to keep your distance." She said in defense mode.

"..and you were purring like a contented cat next to me. You never really put up any form of resistance sweets." His blue eyes twinkled like the sea when they were hit with the rays of the sun. The liquid courage had worn off and both of them were now completely aware of their actions. She felt her cheeks redden as she looked at Colson's inviting body . Fortunately, Y/N's phone broke the awkward moment.

"Hey Mom." Nice save Mrs Y/M/L/N.

"Hey sweetie. I'm sorry to disturb you but the press has been camped outside my house for two days now and-"

"What do they want? Why didn't you say something?" She sat up and Colson looked at her with concern.

"I'm sorry sweetie I just didn't want to worry you. Plus they have been blowing up my phone and my practice has been overwhelmed. I know I'm a good therapist but this has just been ridiculous. I have had people make appointments just so they can ask me questions about your relationship with Colson. Even your friends Liv and Lisa are being stalked-it's a nightmare. Urrgh.." She screamed in frustration.

"I'm so sorry Mom. This is all my fault. How can I fix it?" Y/N said with determination.

"No, no honey, don't do anything hasty. I think I'll just take a well needed vacation to Bora Bora or something and I think I have a conference coming soon-" She sighed.

"Should I come with you? I can-"

"No. You stay put. Besides, that will do more harm than good." She murmured.

"So what can I do?" Y/N raked her hair with her fingers. Colson motioned for her to hand over the phone and she gave it to him.

"Mrs Y/M/L/N. I'm sorry to hear about your little inconvenience but not to worry I got it handled." Colson said confidently. Y/N looked at him in disbelief-who did he think he was? Ethan Hunt?

"Oh really?" Mrs Y/M/L/N was equally shocked.

"I'll get my team to come and get you out of there and set you up in a place where you will be secured and- where you can enjoy your privacy once again." He assured her.

"Oh no Colson, you don't have to do that sweetie." She protested.

"I want to. Please let me? It would mean so much to me." The Baker Charm was turned on.

"Okay sure." Mrs Y/M/L/N caved in.

"Great." His face lit up. "One of my assistants will be in touch shortly."

"Am I still going to see you guys on the weekend?" She asked.

"Yes. We will be there sooner actually." Colson confirmed.

"I can't wait." She squealed in delight.

"Okay speak soon." Colson rang off.

"Colson Baker did you just lie to my mother?" Y/N said in bewilderment. There was no way they would go back to Ohio and back again to Paris in time for his show.

"FYI sweets my Paris Show has been cancelled because of the bombing at Ariana Grande's concert. I'm not taking any chances and my security team has advised against it. So..we can fly to Minnesota then straight to Norway after the weekend. Easy." He gestured with his hands.

"You're too sweet. I could kiss you right now." Y/N said without thinking.

"Then what's stopping you sweets?" He leveled his face with hers.

"I- we-can't." She hopped of the bed and grabbed a robe. "So what you got planned for today?" His heart sagged, he expected her to be all over him. Most girls would have jumped at the opportunity-but not Y/N.

"Pack your bags Bambi. We're going to Ohio." He said as he left the room, his shoulders sagged. She really wanted to kiss him but she wanted to tread carefully. Things between them were complicated enough.

Tagged: @kellysimagines

[shannygoatgruff]

Only Fan(s) - A Thriller

Genre: Thriller

Pairing: Modern Ivar/OC

Warning: Language, sex, stalking, obsession, kidnapping, sexual assault

Rating: MA+18

Summary: Sometimes OnlyFans subscribers want a little more than internet pictures. Sometimes they want to be your ONLY fan…

Header by: @flowers-in-your-hayr

Thanks to @xbellaxcarolinax for being my beta.

Disclaimer: This story will deal with some topics that might be a little uncomfortable for some people. As always, I’ll try to tackle the hard stuff as tactfully as possible.

a/n: I wrote this months ago and let it sit on the shelf. I’m finally ready to dust it off and give it another go...so let’s see what it do...

Part iii - Trifecta

Torren Sykes hadn’t lived what anyone would consider an exciting life. In fact, in her twenty-three years, she had only just left her mom’s double-wide trailer in East Bumble Fuck less than a year ago. Not quite 365 days later, she still didn’t have a pot to piss in, nor a window to throw it out of.

Truthfully, she usually didn’t know where she would be getting her next meal - that sort of thing wasn’t really a big deal to her. She actually liked the mystery of it all. There was something undeniably sexy about not knowing what the day would bring - who she would run into, or have to take something off of to survive. If someone else had to get hurt so she could make it through another day, such was life. She’d won. Those other people just needed to be better at playing the fucking game, plain and simple. 

Besides, pulling a caper or two kept her on her toes. She learned how to pull off the best of them from her mother. It’s not like adulting was one of Leslie’s strong suits. 

If only her mother had been more like her Me-Maw, now that woman was a saint. For reasons that Torren never cared to ask, she lived with her Me-Maw until she was five years old.  Leslie would periodically visit her to drop off the obligatory present on Christmas or her birthday if that bitch remembered. Not that they were ever good presents – just some cheap ass, unwrapped items she happened to pick up at the dollar store. Torren couldn't remember a gift that she had received wasn't still in the plastic bag with the receipt in it.

Cheap, whore.

Just once she would have liked a real baby doll from Toys-R-Us, instead of those cheap, hard, plastic dolls that the hand molds weren't cut out evenly, and the jagged edges cut the shit out of her face when she tried to sleep with it. But, that was Leslie. Torren didn't choose her; Leslie sure as shit didn't choose her daughter.

It became painfully clear to Torren that her mother didn’t want anything to do with her after her Me-Maw died. Unfortunately, she found herself as her mother’s unwitting roommate at a very young age, forcing the girl to spend a lot of time alone. 

By the time she turned nine, Torren was convinced that her mother was a prostitute and she was a trick baby. It was the only explanation she could come up with seeing as how her mother never worked but always had enough money to pay the rent, keep the lights on, and have plenty of booze, chips, and hot dogs in the fridge. 

Not that Torren had many other life experiences with a working parent to compare her situation to, but it just seemed pretty fucking difficult to have a job if one were passed out drunk all the fucking time. Besides, who had time to work when during your waking hours you were spending them with one of your many, many boyfriends? 

Torren used to wonder if one of the multitudes of men that would traipse in and out of that trailer were her father - but the more she got to know what type of person Leslie was, the more she realized that whoever that guy was, had gotten the hell out of dodge. 

Lucky son-of-a-bitch. 

But for all of Leslie’s flaws, she did manage to impart her three philosophies of life onto her daughter - the three things that Torren still lived by to this day. It was the least she could do. God knows that whore sure as fuck didn’t do anything else for her.

Mama’s Life Lessons #1 - There is no such thing as too much black eyeliner

As trivial as it sounded, it proved to be a precious lesson. Shortly after she had moved into the trailer, Leslie had forced Torren to sit on the bed and watch as she got ready for another one of her "dates". She had told the little girl that beautiful eyes were the one good gene that ran in their family. “You got to learn how to work ‘em,” Leslie exhaled a long plume of smoke at her reflection in the vanity mirror, “You listenin'? This's important. This right here," she held up the black liner pencil, “is gonna be your best friend.”

Of course, Torren had no idea what she meant. How was a pencil going to her friend? She didn’t really care so much as what her mother was saying to her at the moment, it was more of the fact that she was actually talking to her that made Torren hang on to every word. 

That’s why she picked up the black liner pencil from her mother's cluttered vanity table and leaned over to look in the mirror. She tried tracing her bottom lid, the way her mother had done, but at six it was a little easier said than done. She had just learned how to color inside the lines with a fat crayon; mastering the art of applying liner would have to wait a few more years. 

Leslie, however, was not willing to wait that long, "What the hell's amatta wit'chu, Dumbass? You doin' it all wrong," she said snatching the pencil from the girl's hand. Grabbing Torren roughly by the chin she said, "Gotta teach you every goddamn thing. Hold still." She mumbled more curses and said something about her good-for-nothing mother not teaching her brat anything useful.

By the time she had finished cursing her name, Leslie roughly turned her daughter's head toward the mirror, "Yeah you got those eyes. Now, learn to use ‘em.” Leslie dropped the pencil onto the vanity before picking up her drink and shooing Torren away. 

That was the day that Drew Watkins bought her an ice cream. It had to be the eyeliner. It was a true fact, not just another one of her mother's drunken theories. Eyeliner and her eyes...she didn’t know how she used them, but they worked.

From that day on Torren opted to never step foot outside without heavy black liner again. 

Mama’s Life Lessons #2 - As long as there are men around that want to fuck you, you will never need to work

It wasn’t like she going to go out and get a real job. She wasn’t raised with much of a work ethic. She was too young to remember if her Me-Maw worked and what she gathered from her mother was that there would always be men around to take care of her. 

Leslie told her that she didn’t need to work because working a man was a full-time job. If she were doing that right, she wouldn’t have time for a fucking 9-5. It didn’t matter if he was in a relationship, gay, or the fucking Pope. As long as he a dick and she could bend over, and her eyes were done, her rent was as good as paid. 

If she wanted more than just the basic bills paid, she would have to rethink what all she was willing to do - but just make sure she didn’t do too much otherwise she couldn’t guarantee a steady paycheck every week.

This sage advice didn’t make much sense to 8-year-old Torren, but as the years progressed she started to work it into one of her life’s mottos. She would never want for anything. She could always rely on the kindness of strangers and when that got to be too boring, she could always take it, just to spice things up a bit.  

Mama’s Life Lessons #3 - If you want something do whatever it takes to make sure you get it

As a child that grew up with the television as a babysitter, Torren Sykes knew that she was destined to love Ivar “Lothbrok” Ragnarsson since she was a little girl. Ever since that day she turned on the TV and saw this adorable blue-eyed boy drawing Mickey Mouse ears saying, “I’m Ivar Lothbrok and you’re watching the Disney Channel,” she knew that he had to be hers. 

He was co-starring on a show called The Baker Boys, about three foster kids, who had come to live with a family that owned a bakery. Ivar’s character was named Simon Baker - a mischievous kid that lived with his grandmother until she died and never felt like he fit in with this cookie-cutter family. 

His life was just like hers - minus the cookie-cutter family that loved him and all. She was actually with more of an alcoholic whore that didn’t give a shit if she lived or died, and not pulling stunts in a bakery with flour and messing up orders like him, but she still saw them as kindred spirits. 

When the show got canceled she was devastated. How dare the world try to keep her from her man? Didn’t they understand this was love? Didn’t those people at Disneyland know that he was the only person in the world that understood her?

As if on queue, she happened to find the Season 2 DVD box-set at the library one afternoon. Her mother had kicked her out of the trailer because she had a date and couldn’t have the dumbass child around fucking things up for her. Torren had nothing else to do - at 11-years-old, she had no money, and nowhere to go. At least the library was air-conditioned. 

She wanted that box-set. Slipping it into her backpack unnoticed was the easy part. Trying to get it past the alarms would be harder. She watched for a while, paying particular attention to the way the check-out system worked. 

When the librarians changed shifts, she let a smile cross her lips as she picked a few random books from the shelves. 

Her beautiful eyes went as big as saucers when the alarm buzzed, and the young male librarian looked down at her, still clutching the large reference book to her check. Carefully she had stepped across to the other side of the alarm sensor waiting to collect the books she was checking out.

“I’m sorry, you can’t check out reference books,” the young man said, blinking his hazel eyes at Torren, the corner of his lip tugging into a smile.

She let a pout fall on her lips as she lowered her large eyes down to the book in her arms, “Oh...sorry.” She handed the book back, “I didn’t realize I still had it.” And like that, she walked out of the library with her prize.

She had stolen for Ivar...now if that wasn’t love what was?

The only thing that had threatened their love through the years is when Ivar got married. It damn near broke Torren’s heart. How could he be so cruel? She didn’t give a fuck that the marriage was short-lived. She even understood why he had to do it. He had gotten that bitch pregnant, and he didn’t have much choice. But, he cut her deep. 

Didn’t he know how much she loved him? Didn’t he know that she stuck by him when he had joined 6cess and had seen him in concert 3 times? She still had the autographed photo of the two of them from the signing at Spring Hills Mall - when she was wearing that blue midriff cardigan and ripped jeans and he had his arm around her. That shirt brought out the color in his eyes. She even wore Happy, which he said was his favorite perfume. She thought it smelled like Comet, but she stole a bottle of it from Macy’s right before the photo-op to smell good for him. 

And he went and pulled this shit?

Besides, Johnny Law said that she was still too young for him and that he could get arrested for being with her. She knew that he had to pretend to have a normal life so that no one would know about their love affair. She was just understanding like that. It gave her time to grow up a little more so that when they could he be together, the law wouldn't be standing in their way. She really didn't give a fuck, but she suspected he did. Why else hadn't he come for her?

Torren didn’t even like their music. She wasn’t a boyband kind of girl, but for him, she would make the exception. She was more of the gangsta rap or heavy metal type girl. But if Ivar was serenading her, she’d listen to sappy, wrist-slitting, emo, shit rock all fucking day long, because she loved him. 

She hated that he had gotten that whore pregnant, too. She understood that he had to pretend that they had a normal marriage. She knew that when he was fucking that bitch, he was really imagining it was her. The years apart had made him a master at hiding his true feelings for her. He couldn't give anyone cause for suspicion. If he let on the truth he could risk losing everything…his house, cars, job, and his kid. That whore was trying to keep them apart. But, she was just a small obstacle that posed no real threat to Torren.

She did not doubt that she would be his daughter's new mommy. The kid would probably be sad at first that she wouldn't be with that other woman like Torren had been when her grandmother died. But, the kid would get used to it. Torren was going to be a whole hell of a lot better at being a mom than her piece of shit mother was to her. That was for damn sure. She was going to teach her stepdaughter all about eyeliner, and how to dye her hair. 

She was going to teach her what party clothes every woman should have in her wardrobe and how to get a man to do whatever she wanted by just batting her eyes at him. She would even share her secrets on what pills to mix and what dosages to give for submission, making a man catatonic, and if she was really good, she'd teach what to put in a drink to kill someone. Hell, she even planned on giving the child her most discrete drug contacts. That would of course have to wait until she was older – at least 13. She was going to be such a good mommy. 

Ivar's daughter was going to love Torren as much as Torren loved him. They were going to be the perfect family.

Torren was as hopelessly devoted to Ivar as he was to her. He had waited for her to become legal. Just months before she was old enough to legally consent to sex, and get married without parental permission, his marriage started falling apart. She knew that Ivar was trying to make a clean break from his wife, and get his daughter used to the idea of them being apart before he could come home to her. 

Torren had been thoughtful and respectful enough to give him that space to make sure everything was right before she stepped into the role of the new Mrs. Lothbrok. He had to test the waters, make sure that she still wanted him as much as he wanted her. He had to get back into the swing of things…have sex constantly to make sure he could keep up with her. She knew that "the prude" wasn't doing it nearly as often as he needed to - why else would he have an Only Fans page?

Torren was the only one that could feed his appetite, and he hers.

Now, they were both finally ready. She was mature and developed. She knew what she needed, and it was him. He had his fun before her, but now he was auditioning again and getting everything back on track for them. He had a great relationship with his daughter and his dumb ass ex-wife finally understood that their relationship was a fling that went too far.

His face told her everything that her heart already knew. He loved her. 

Why else would be looking at her like that? She could feel herself blush when he smiled on Instagram like that into them. Then he gave her that smile. That was her smile; the one that he reserved for her during their private times. Yet, there he was doing it in front of an audience of millions, and he didn't care who saw it. He had to let her know that it was time for her to come home. It was like a sleeper cell being awakened.

She didn't have a choice. She did what any other woman in her position would do. She packed a bag, threw it in the car she stole a few days before and drove. Armed with her trifecta of knowledge and determination, she prepared to face the obstacles that were bound to get in her way. There was nothing that was going to stop her from getting her man.

Nothing.

Part ii || Part iv

Tags: @ideagarden-blog1​  @youbloodymadgenius​ @xbellaxcarolinax​ @a-mess-of-fandoms​ @didiintheblog​ @conaionaru​ @peachyboneless​ @flowers-in-your-hayr @heavenly1927​ @zuxiezendler @waiting4inspiration​ @saldelys @didiintheblog​  @revolution-starter​

[storiesforallfandoms]

proud ~ cillian murphy

word count: 2015

request?: yes!

@shady80smusicsingercolor​ “The reader was always tried to get them proud,but nothing,one day the reader remembers their parents how they were never supportive or proud,the reader cried, cillian was passing by their dressing room,he stop cuz he heard the faithful tears,he came in,he ask what's wrong,and the reader explain how their parents never were proud of them but their siblings yeah,and ask him"what's wrong with me"and cillian reassures the reader nothing wrong with them but with their parents yeah,he told the reader he was Damm proud of them”

description: when you’re reminded of your rough childhood, your co-star is there to lift you up when you’re feeling down

pairing: cillian murphy x female!reader

warnings: swearing, angst

masterlist

You were in the middle of taking a picture of yourself in your costume when your phone buzzed. A notification at the top of the screen read that you had you were tagged in a post on Facebook, by your mum.

You cringed, immediately knowing what it would be.

A picture of your mum, dad, and sister sat around a table at a restaurant popped up on your screen. The caption for it read, “A special dinner for our beautiful daughter, who just scored another win on a case!” As per usual, she had tagged your dad, your sister, and you. Not because they wished you were there, but to remind you of your sister’s accomplishments and their pride in them.

Your parents made it very clear at a young age that your sister was the favourite child. They had a vision for the future of their kids, one that included a high paying job and eventually a family, and your sister was the one to follow this vision, in their eyes anyways.

Your sister was a straight A student all throughout her school years, and was accepted into law school with a full scholarship right out of high school. You, on the other hand, found yourself falling in love with acting. You were in drama club all through school and often starred in the school plays and musicals. When you graduated high school you were accepted into one of the biggest art schools, and of course you went.

Your parents were less than enthusiastic about your path, even after your acting career took off. They viewed acting as not being  a “real job” and often ridiculed you, comparing you to your sister or reminding you of your sister’s accomplishments at every opportunity.

You took a deep breath to calm yourself. You had to remind yourself that just because your parents weren’t proud of you didn’t mean you should be so hard on yourself. You had a successful career, you were happy as an actress. You weren’t going to let them bring you down.

You went to the family group chat to send a congratulatory message to your sister, one that your parents would see and realize they weren’t going to get to you this time.

“Congrats on your case win sis!”

Your sister responded a moment later, “Thanks sis! you're fantastic on Peaky Blinders! I can’t wait until the next season!”

The text gave you a brief moment of happiness. You and your sister never had bad blood. You both understood that you took your own paths and there was no reason to give in to your parents patronizing.

The happiness faded when another message came, this time from your mum, “Did your sister tell you she was seeing someone? It’s pretty serious, we might have our first son in law soon.”

You tossed your phone to the floor and buried your head in your hands. Of course they were going to start taking jabs at your love life now. Now that your sister had a serious boyfriend they had something else to belittle you about.

You were trying to hold back your tear when a knock came at your dressing room door. You sighed and swallowed the lump in your throat. “Come in!”

Your co-star, Cillian, opened the door. You looked at him through your vanity mirror. “We’re about to start filming soon, are you ready?”

You nodded. “Yeah, just give me a minute and I’ll be out.”

“Are you okay?”

Being asked if you were okay when you were on the verge of tears was always the worst question. You had to look down so Cillian didn’t see the tears forming in your eyes.

“I’m fine,” you replied. “Tell everyone I’ll be out soon.”

Cillian crossed the room to sit next to you. You kept looking down at the vanity’s desk.

“For an actress, you’re not the best at acting like you’re okay,” he teased, causing you to laugh. “What’s wrong? And don’t say it’s nothing because you know I’ll force you to tell me.”

You knew there was no use in lying. Cillian knew you better than most people, he’d know you weren’t telling the truth.

You picked up your phone and passed it to Cillian, allowing him to read the most recent messages. His eyebrows furrowed together in confusion. “I don’t get it, what does her love life have to do with either of your jobs? And why would your mum make a comment about him being a future son in law? Your sister even told her that she’s only been seeing the guy for six months.”

“Exactly!” you snapped. “It has nothing to do with the conversation, my mum just wants to tell me she has a new reason to ridicule me. I don’t have a real job, I haven’t had a serious relationship, I’m nowhere near having a kid or being married. But my sister, oh she’s the star child - a lawyer, has a boyfriend now, will probably give my parents their first grandchild.”

You buried your head in your hands again, finally allowing the tears to start flowing freely. You knew the makeup artist was going to be pissed, but you could care less at that moment. You couldn’t leave this frustration to build up while you were filming, it would just guarantee that you'd fuck up the scene and feel even worse.

Cillian took you into his arms, resting his head against yours as he ran a hand soothingly over your body.

“It’s alright,” he said. “It’s alright, let it all out.”

You felt comfortable in his arms, like it was the best place to be, and honestly, it was. Cillian was your closest friend on set of Peaky Blinders, probably your closest friend all together. There were many a times when he would hold you like this, whether it was a friendly hug, a scene on set, an idle gesture when the two of you were hanging out together. Being in Cillian’s arms was so soothing, it was exactly what you needed.

You finally pulled away and looked at yourself in the mirror. Luckily enough, since you were filming a show that was taking place in the early 1900s you didn’t have to wear too much makeup, mainly mascara and enough foundation that you didn’t look shiny on screen. The makeup artist on set had given you waterproof mascara, which again was lucky for you, but your foundation, however, was ruined from water streaks running down your cheeks.

You grabbed a makeup wipe from your vanity and began wiping the foundation from your face. You had foundation in your dressing room for moments like this, so that you could fix your makeup before scenes so no one would realize you were so upset.

“I get that they may not have viewed acting as a possible job back when I was in high school,” you said as you fixed your makeup, “but I’ve made an actual career from it. I’ve been in countless shows and movies, I’ve been nominated for awards and even won countless ones, and they can’t accept that. They can’t be proud of me for making a name for myself in my own way. They’ve never been proud of me. What’s wrong with me?”

“Nothing!” Cillian told you. “Nothing is wrong with you. You’re an absolutely amazing person, and you’re so talented and amazing. Just because you chose a different path from your sister and because you’re not following in their footsteps or the path that your parents wanted you to take doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with you. There’s something wrong with your parents, they’re the assholes here.”

You sighed and shook your head, putting the foundation away. “This thing with my sister having a boyfriend is what’s really gonna start getting to me, I already know that. Being an actress I don't really have the time for a relationship, and I haven’t found a genuine guy that I want to be with because so many Hollywood guys are fake assholes who want to date you for their own professional gain. By the time I find someone to be with, my sister will probably be engaged with a child along the way and my parents will never let me live that down.”

As you spoke, Cillian was listening intently, until you got to the end of your rant. That’s when he cupped your face in his hands and pulled you towards him, pressing his lips to you. The gesture shocked you at first and you almost jerked your head away, but, just like being in his arms, kissing Cillian just felt so right. You relaxed into the kiss, cupping his face as well to hold him close.

He pulled away after a brief moment, smiling at you as he did so. “Am I one of those asshole famous people do you think?”

You giggled. “Oh God no, you’re the nicest person I’ve ever met.”

“Well then, this nice person thinks you’re the most amazing person he has ever met, and that your parents couldn’t be more wrong in the way that they treat you. And this nice person wants to take you out on a date when we’re finished with filming today.”

You smiled brightly. “I would love to go out after filming today. But to do that, we should get to filming.”

Realization passed Cillian’s face. “Shit, you’re right. Let’s go.”

“I’ll be there in a minute,” you said as Cillian stood. “You go and tell them I’m sorry I’m late but it’s family issues.”

Cillian nodded, leaning down to kiss you once more, before leaving the room.

You took your phone in your hand and checked the family chat to see that the last message was from your sister, explaining to you that her and her boyfriend hadn’t even been together for long and chastising your mother for her message. You took a deep breath and began to type out one final text message.

“I’m really happy for your relationship, sis, and I’d love to meet him, but this is my final message in this groupchat. I’ll be leaving the chat and taking mom and dad off of Facebook. I also probably won’t even tell you guys when I’m visiting home since you’ve made it clear that you don’t even want to see me. I know that I haven’t conformed to your beliefs of “success”, but I love where I’ve gone in life and I’m happy with my career. I’ve been in countless TV shows and movies and I’ve won awards for those things. I love my job, and I wouldn’t change that for the world. As for my love life, if either of you ever cared enough to check in on me instead of flaunting (Y/S/N)’s accomplishments in my face you’d know that I too am seeing someone. Too bad you’ve officially burned all bridges and won’t be meeting him now, but what can you do? Feel free to call if you ever decide to be proud of your youngest daughter for where she is in life and not just for your oldest because she followed the life that you tried to force upon us (I love you sis, don’t take this as an insult)”

After hitting send, you left the chat and promptly blocked both of your parents on Facebook. You took a deep breath and sighed heavily. It felt like a weight had been taken off of your shoulders then.

You inspected your makeup in the mirror to make sure it looked fine before getting up and finally walking to set. The rest of your co-stars were gathered, waiting, when you finally arrived.

“Sorry I’m late,” you told them. “Family stuff. I’m ready to go if you guys are.”

Everyone started getting in place. As the camera was being set up, Cillian looked at you with a little concern on his face. “Everything alright?”

You smiled at him, suddenly feeling more confident than you ever had. “I feel great. Let’s kill this scene.”

[daily-dose-of-imagines]

ʙᴀʀɢᴀɪɴꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴇᴀʟꜱ | 𝘏𝘢𝘪𝘬𝘺𝘶𝘶!! Hitmen AU! 19+ [Daichi x F!Reader] One-Shot | NSFW

Dedicating this one-shot to @heartbeat-art  for drawing my rendition of Daichi in this AU ;; This be for you bb! 

I literally feel like I gotta write Daichi to bring it full circle now man, I hope you all enjoy this and literally thank you precious bean, for inspiring me to write for my AU again man ;; I’ve never had anyone want to make art for anything I’ve written for and I jsut ahng;aoehgow;h I’m wallowing in feels --- ಥωಥ

TW; Manhandling ; Slight choking ; Dirty talking ; Just Daichi being a whole daddy--- I mean what  Σ(´・ω・｀) ; idk ahsoigaheroig I’m just plain old sinning

» » Admin Ko

»»————-　♔　————-««

A ping echoed throughout the empty foyer room. A lone figure sat glimpsing over the information provided as she couldn’t help but let a small chuckle escape her lips. Her form was seated rather comfortably in the large chair as her legs were pulled in tight to allow her chin to settle atop her knees as she finished the transaction and bargaining details on her end.

It was a corrupt. Something she should’ve never considered, but after the blatant jab to her company and the clear hit on her COO and CFO there was nothing else she could really revert to that wasn’t morally corrupt. 

“Besides...they were the one’s who started this game, and now it’s time to remind them who owns what.”

Dark (e/c) eyes narrowed at the mere thought of how her co-workers had been exterminated. Perhaps her enemies had hired the same hitmen, perhaps they didn’t. All she knew was that the planned meeting for details was within the next 24 hours, and she wasn’t going to miss a single thing. 

Her choice to step into the corrupt field was forced, though she thought it was unnecessary, the desire to rightfully bring vengeance for her subordinates reigned supreme. 

“They’re just a bunch of lecherous perverts anyways...”

Though at this point, she wasn’t sure if she was trying to convince herself that her choices were right; yet no matter what she thought now, the nail on the coffin had been slammed down with no remorse.

»»————-　➴　————-«« 

Simple and clean cut, he sat calmly within the well lit diner. Though for the price and bargain he was given, he had to admit he was rather surprised at the quaint meeting place that was set. He was used to the extravagant restaurants, the loud highly populated clubs, the dark sinister bars with their own shares of secrets, but a small diner? It was a first, and immediately his interests in the client had piqued. 

“Sawamura, correct?”

Soft, yet clearly pronounced, his attention fell onto the woman who approached the booth he was situated at. He offered a nod before gesturing to the seat before him. His deep bronze eyes focusing on her entire being as she settled in the booth across from him.

“Before we begin, I have to ask. Why here? It’s rather...”

“Different?”

A knowing smile formed on her lips as she waved a hand up for the waitress to swing over to take their orders. Her (e/c) never leaving his as a hint of mischief twinkled at him.

“Let’s just say I’ve been to many functions similar to this, and since it is my own I wanted a...change of pace, if you’d like to put it that way.”

The smile never left her features as she finally allowed her gaze to move from his own strong one as she looked up at the waitress, her order falling flawlessly from her lips before the woman turned to him.

Simply ordering a black coffee, the waitress left with the common phrase that their orders would be out shortly. Once out of earshot, he shifted to lean back, his eyes never leaving hers as he took in her calm stature as she met his gaze head-on. 

“I will say it is out of the norm, though not unwelcome. But let’s get to business, Shall we?”

“Ah yes, the order I have is simple. I understand that in your line of work you don’t necessarily care for the personal details so I won’t bore you with that, but I’m sure besides that you’re also wanting to discuss the payment methods, yes?”

“Eloquently said. You’re right on the dot Ms. (y/n). I have no qualms in your personal business, however I am rather curious over your bargaining chip you added. I will say, when that specific order came in my men were...more than shocked.”

A soft groan escaped his lips as he finally closed his eyes as he remembered how utterly chaotic that day had been.

“And? Are you opposed to it Sawamura?”

Her tone was sharp, quick witted as she tilted her head at him, the look of mischief never leaving her jovial (e/c) eyes as she watched him release a breath.

“No, not at all. Rather, I’m curious as to why you’d offer yourself. It strikes me as odd, and I can’t help but feel as though you’re aiming for something more than what is to be anticipated.”

With that, he leaned forward his gaze stormy and heated as he rested his elbows on the table, fingers intertwined with one another as he quirked a brow at her, almost as if teasing her to continue with her explanation. 

Meeting him halfway, she leaned forward, her body mimicking his own as she had a coy smile on her face as she gently rested her chin atop her intertwined hands. 

“Simple things really, after all I’m a woman who has desires, and I would’ve either changed the bargain if the person I was meeting wasn’t what I was expecting. As for that last statement...I’ll share that upon your completion of our deal.”

“Oh? And what was your expectations, Ms (y/n)?”

“A handsome, strong man who looks as though he could fuck me the way I want him to.”

The tension between the pair was high, amusement dancing in her eyes as his gaze practically darkened with heat and curiosity as he smirked. Though, with the sudden appearance of the waitress, the tension eased albeit slightly as the orders had been set down before them.

Yet neither broke eye contact, even as the waitress had asked if they needed anything else. 

“I believe we’ll be fine for the time being, right Ms. (y/n)?”

“Correct, I’ll wave you down if there’s anything we may need.”

Their voices overlapped one another smoothly, as if planned as she briefly broke their little staring contest to ensure that the waitress was completely out of earshot. Once she was, the young CEO relaxed and leaned back into the booth as she began to dig into her food, a little hum of joy escaping her lips at the first bite before she spoke once more.

“Well, do we have ourselves a deal Sawamura?”

Taking another bite, she took her time to chew the morsel before finally bringing her fiery gaze up to meet his own as she set one elbow on the table, and resting her chin against the palm of her hand as she waited patiently for his answer.

His response wasn’t immediate. Though he kept his gaze with hers, he only broke it momentarily as he grabbed the cup of coffee before taking a calm sip. A low sigh escaping him at the comforting cup before he raised his eyes to her own waiting ones.

“As long as you uphold your end of the deal and explain your ulterior motive after, then we have ourselves a deal. I’ll send you the results once it’s over.”

“Excellent. Your reward will be worth it. I guarantee it.”

»»————-　➴　————-««

It had been a hectic week. With working through the two deaths in the company and dealing with the publicity, she was ready for a nice glass of wine and a long night’s rest of the unnecessary stress that was given to her by the opposing corporation. 

At the last meeting she had met eyes with the CEO. His grimy eyes raking over her form, and the unnerving smug smirk on his face when the deaths in her company was mentioned in private. It had her utterly pissed off and hoping for the damn bastard’s execution even more.

And, to her surprise it came as a beautiful text message. Despite the unknown number, she knew exactly who it was.

xx-xxx-xxx-xxxx

Neutralized. 

Grinning from ear to ear, she felt the copious amounts of stress wash away. Though even to her, she wasn’t sure if she should’ve even felt this way. It was immoral, wrong. Yet she couldn’t bring herself to be upset. The amount of corruption and perverse things the CEO of her rival corporation had gotten away with was absolutely sickening, and finally he was gone.

xx-xxx-xxx-xxxx

8 p.m. xx/xx

375-1250, Sodeyachi, Ogawara-machi Shibata-gun, Miyagi

The response was simple, her eyes now hooded as she sent the message before getting herself up from her place on the couch.

“I suppose I should give him a treat.”

With that, she set her phone on the table before heading out to prepare for her visitor. 

»»————-　➴　————-««

The light knock at the door brought a sense of joy through her veins as she slowly got up from her seat on the couch. The room had been dimly lit, a glass of wine already downed and settling into the fiery pit of her stomach as she answered the door. The long transparent lacy robe she wore only added to her appearance as she gave her visitor a coy grin.

“Welcome, please. Make yourself at home.”

With that she shifted to allow the built man into the rented space as she closed the door behind him, locking the door. Though before she could turn to address him she was slammed up against the door, her thighs resting on either side of his waist as one of his arms coiled around her waist as he nipped at her ear.

A light gasp escaped her parted lips as her fingers found purchase against the deep royal blue dress shirt he wore as her thighs clenched around his sturdy waist. 

“Impatient, aren’t we?”

Though her words were light and wispy, the low growl in his throat had her shiver in anticipation as he planted a firm kiss to her jaw.

“You leave yourself looking like an entire treat for someone like me, and of course I’m going to take what’s due.”

“Then take it big boy...show me how badly you want it...”

There was no hesitation as his lips surged forth to claim her own. Passionate yet clearly skilled, his tongue dove forth as he swallowed every gasp and moan that escaped her lips. Her fingers tightening around the soft fabric of his shirt as his hands had slipped down to her thighs, caressing them lightly-- almost tauntingly before his fingers slipped past the thin fabric of the robe, and roughly grasped her ass as she was hefted up into his arms.

Another moan escaped her as his lips began to attack her neck. Unrelenting as each kiss left a mark on her skin. Each earning a groan of pleasure  from her as her fingers moved from his shirt to his hair as her fingers roughly ran through his hair, nails trailing down as a low moan was coaxed out of the large man, and the next thing she knew, she was thrown onto the bed. 

Though the sight gifted to her next was something she was sure she would desperately be wanting to see again in the near future. The grin that graced his features had her tauntingly spread her legs as she licked her lips. Though as he practically ripped his shirt off to reveal the mass expanse of muscle and unmarked territory to her, she couldn’t help but let out a sudden whimper as her fingers clutched tightly around the sheets beneath her. Practically ready to pounce onto the male before she was suddenly lying flat on her back, the robe doing well in restricting her movements as he seemed to pin down just the right areas to keep her in place.

“That desperate huh?”

The rasp and growl that coated his words as her softly groan before she tauntingly brought her head up to peck his jaw, though the action brought a large hand down to her throat, lightly squeezing as a spike of adrenaline surged through her. The dark hungry look in his eyes and the dominating aura he possessed had her practically sopping wet as she gyrated her hips against the heat that was pressed against her.

“Trying to ride my thigh now? Well aren’t you an impatient little girl...”

His taunting had her let out a raspy moan as he squeezed lightly once more, allowing his thigh to rub up against her throbbing cunt as she struggled to get air into her while alleviating the throbbing in her cunt.

“M-More...”

Desperate for more, she struggled to grasp his wrist as she felt her eyes roll into the back of her head at the immense sensations she was feeling, though had to bite back a cry as he pulled back. Vanquishing the rush she was feeling as he relented his hold on her. Confusion was written all over her face before he spoke once more. Heat flooding her cheeks as she couldn’t help but immediately do as he asked.

“Finger yourself for me, pretty girl. Let me see you prep yourself for when I fuck that wet cunt of yours.”

Leaning back, she did as she was told, her fingers daintily removing the thin piece of fabric that covered her as she began to slowly spread her legs side, her fingers slowly working their way around the juices that flooded out of her throbbing pussy before she began working and stretching herself for him.

As she did so, he slowly unbuckled his belt and began removing the last bits of clothes he had on. The look on his face practically having her forgo her assignment to just crawl over and take the hit man’s rock hard erection into her lips. 

“Stay and do as you’re told, pretty girl...”

The sheer amount of lust that coated his words had her gulping as she continued to stretch and fuck herself open for him, pushing as deep as she could as his gaze stayed strong on her.

“That’s it...stretch yourself good for me....gonna fill you and fuck that cute sopping cunt of yours...”

Another whine came from her as the thought of being filled flooded her mind, her ministrations slowing slightly before she was jerked back into the present as her hands were halted by a larger pair. Strong copper eyes bore deeply into her own before she was suddenly lifted up and set over his lap as he nipped at her neck.

“Work yourself on my baby girl...and before you even ask I’ve got protection on. No time to be a dad...”

Despite the comment, she couldn’t help but not care much as the comment really slipped by her thoughts before she slowly worked herself down onto him. His girth and size stretching her much more than what she had expected as she let out a sharp gasp as her fingers dug into his shoulders, marking up his skin as he eased her onto his cock.

“That’s right, good girl...you’re doing so well princess~.”

Gravelly and slightly slurred, his words began to jumble at the heat that was wrapped around him as he forced himself to wait until she had completely eased herself down onto his cock. Once settled, he gave an experimental jerk of his hips and she let out a shaky gasp and mewl as she pressed her forehead against his shoulder as she tightly clung onto him.

“Go on baby girl, let’s see you bounce.”

The teasing tone in his voice left no room for arguments as she shakily nodded before slowly moving herself up and down. The feel practically euphoric as she continued to quicken her pace, though when she thought she was about to tire out, the position had suddenly shifted and she was staring down at him, her body suddenly upright as he grinned cheekily at her before he jerked his hips up, helping her along before his fingers dug into her hips, steadying her only slightly as he began to meet her pace.

The coil of heat that formed between the pair grew even more as she felt her body begin to tense up. A string of curses left her lips as she tightened herself around him, before she came. Exhaustion hitting her soon after she felt him come straight after her. The bruising grip on her loosening as she felt herself lay on top of him in exhaustion.

At one point she had remembered laying on his chest, the next she was by his back was facing her as he seemed to be skimming down his phone.

“Mmmm...lay with me Sawamura...”

Broken and raspy, her voice was soft as she carefully got up to wrap her arms around him from behind.

“I believe I’m due for my explanation (y/n).”

“I suppose, you did fuck me rather well...I want a sort of business deal Sawarmura...finding other hit men can be so....annoying. Plus, I’ll be able to pay you in any way you want. Not a bad deal isn’t it?”

The silence that came after had her pouting slightly as she pressed her lips against his neck as he finally stopped scrolling through his phone to set it aside before turning to lay her down on the bed before laying next to her on his side.

“...I’ll discuss this with my team first--”

“I only want you.”

A light laugh came from him as he lightly flicked her forehead.

“Idiot, you think I’m going to share my client like this with those idiots? No. If it happens to work in your favor...then you can expect a message.”

“Oh? Then let’s hope that it works out in everyone’s favor~.”

»»————-　➴　————-««

Least to say, the next week she went in to work a brand new phone sat awaiting on her desk with a new message waiting for her.

xx-xxx-xxx-xxxx

What’s the next assignment?

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - King Pascal

This is, in my opinion, the worst episode of season two and I’ll get into why under the cut. 

Summary:  The group is stranded on an island after a storm. The tiny islanders, the Lorbs, mistake Pascal for their mystical ruler; the chameleon loves the adulation, until he’s expected to protect his people from a vicious monster.

Since When Did You Learn How to Sail, Rapunzel? 

So they hit the storm and Rapunzel starts doling out orders like she always does, but like, she logically shouldn’t know what to do here. She’s only been out of the tower for a little over a year and sailing takes time to learn. There’s been nothing to establish beforehand that she’s learned this stuff. If anything Eugene and Lance should be the one giving the orders here as their backgrounds could feasibly included sailing as they’re world travelers. 

Here lies part of the problem with Rapunzel’s characterization, and I’ve already touched upon it back in The Alchemist Returns, but Rapunzel can’t and shouldn’t be magically good at everything. She can be incredibly skilled in some areas, like acrobatics and the arts, but she also should have lapses in knowellage just due to a lack of experience and expertise. 

A female character isn’t ‘weak’ just because they have to sometimes rely on other characters. They shouldn’t be written to be magically better than the male characters just because they got boobs. That’s not empowering; that’s condescending. Women are people, and real people have varied skill sets and weaknesses that match their interests and backgrounds. 

So Why Is the Island Tropical? 

According to what few maps we see in the show (and yes, they are inconsistent, but bare with me), Corona is somewhere in Northern Europe near an ocean or sea. According to dialogue at the end Forest of No Return, they’ve been traveling east, and according to the map in Rapunzel’s Return, the Dark Kingdom is north east of Corona specifically. Meaning that they must be somewhere in the northern Baltic Sea right now, which is not tropical at all.  

This is part of the problem with Tangled’s ‘throw it all into a blender’ style of approach to worldbuilding. If traveling the world is going to be a major plot point for a season then we kind of need to know where things are in relation to each other. Climate should help determine such things, but if you’re all willy nilly about culture, which climate affects, than nothing is going to make sense. 

My only guess is that the island is suppose to be magical so it has a different climate to the surrounding environment, but that’s just a headcanon and not actually stated by anything in the show itself. I shouldn’t have to be doing the work of the writers for them. 

So Why are We Separating the Guys Again? 

Back in Freebird the writers needed to get Cass and Raps alone in order for them to have their bonding time and a heart to heart, but here, it’s just lazy writing. This is a Pascal focus episode and it requires that Rapunzel interact with lots of other characters, so splitting the group up doesn’t benefit the story in any way. 

The writers just didn’t want to fool with writing for eight characters at one time (I’m not counting Fidella or Owl, though logically they should be considered characters in their own right and not just props for the story, but oh well); which begs the question of why they wrote in so many characters to begin with. 

It’s also an excuse to make the girls seem more competent than the boys, which, as I explained above, is not real ‘girl power’; just bad writing.  

Let’s Talk About the Outfit Changes and How Marketing Affects the Story 

The entire point of this episode and indeed this whole island arc, is just because of marketing stipulations. Every season is required to have one Pascal focused episode and one Max focused episode, because Disney marketing wanted to sell cute animal toys. Another requirement of the story was outfit changes for the mains so that once again marketing could sell dolls and variants and such. It’s why Rapunzel, Cass, and Eugene get so many alternate costumes, while Lance doesn’t despite being with them on this journey too. 

Which is understandable to a point. American television animation has always been about selling toys and merchandise. It’s how these shows make most of their money back. If there’s a show that you enjoy and you want to support it being on the air, you need to buy the toys. Priating doesn’t do jack to the bottom line, it does not affect ratings as most people don't own a nielsen rating box. (an increasingly outdated method to calculate popularity anyways) But whether or not the toys sell is the make it or break it point of every show. 

However, there are better ways to implement these stipulations then how Tangled goes about it. You want to give Max and Pascal focus? Then actually give them focus that relates to the overall plot and not just meaningless filler. You want to the characters switch up outfits and have that tie into the story? Then make sure it fits all of the characters and don’t drag it out more than it needs to be, because this island arc it too damn long. 

And you want to know what the biggest kick in the teeth is? There’s barely any merchandise for this outfit. There’s like one paper doll set and that’s it. The toys for Tangled the Series did not sell and they stopped merchandising the show after season one. Now add in the rating plummet during seasons two and three, and we’re incredibly lucky the show didn’t get canceled outright because it’s by all accounts a financial flop. 

I suspect there was an upfront contract that guaranteed them three seasons no matter what, and that’s the only reason it managed to escape the chopping block and why Chris and Ben weren’t let go sooner from the project. Because Chris at least no longer works for Disney. He left as soon as production ended on the show. 

The False God Trope is Over Played 

I can find examples of this trope dating all the way back to the early 60s, and arguably even sooner than that. However around the 80s, after Return of the Jedi hit theaters, the trope was inescapable in children's media. Every cartoon since has had this same plot shoved in somewhere. It also became paired with the ‘liar revealed’ trope (the bane of my existence) more often. 

And that’s what this is; an incredibly stale take on an incredibly by the numbers story. I kept waiting all episode for the other shoe to drop, for some sort of twist on the usual cliche, but it never came. 

This episode is boring, aggravatingly so. It’s the main reason why it’s in my bottom five. Because while you could argue that really little kids wouldn’t be as over exposed to the trope like an adult such as myself, the writers themselves desperately tried to distance themselves from that targeted audience. They’re the ones that yell ‘it’s not a kid show’, while feeding us crap like this, and I just have to roll my eyes. 

Tangled doesn’t know who it’s audience is. It should be pre-teen girls, but the creators want shoot for an older audience, teens, while marketing wants this to be a preschool show. So the series careens wildly all over the place in terms of tone and winds up satisfying no one. Older audiences are frustrated by childish filler such as this, while younger audiences are exposed to themes and messages that they probably shouldn’t be. I know several parents who have stopped their kids from watching the series because they don’t approve of the toxic values the show prometes in its incompetence. 

It bungles so many of its attempts to be mature because it won’t actually explore the complexities of the plot. Either cause it’s wasting too much time on filler, it can’t explore it’s more disturbing elements to their natural conclusions due to the audience, or it just mistakes ‘shocking’ as deep. 

King Pascal isn’t mature or deep. It’s pointless guff that adds nothing while actively taking away from more interesting storylines. I say skip this dreck and go watch Doctor Who’s The Aztecs instead if you want to see this trope done right with maturity while still being all audience friendly. 

It’s also has the added bonus of featuring two well developed strong female characters who hold their own with the equally capable guys while actually developing all of those characters simultaneously, and was co-produced by an actual woman. If they could pull that off in the early sixties than Disney and Chris have no excuse today. 

This Is the Same ‘Lesson’ As Pascal’s Story

In addition to being boring and unoriginal, this episode is also redundant. Rapunzel already learned to show appreciation to Pascal back in season one. Why are we having her relearn this lesson instead of giving Pascal a new arc? 

It’s not even consistent as Rapunzel only acts this way towards him in his focus episodes. It’s also not a lesson in behaving condescendingly in general because Rapunzel goes on to be condensing to everyone anyways. 

So Did We Really Need This Episode Just to Introduce the Island and the Firefly? 

Yes both of these things come into play later, but not in any significant way. We’re here on this island for four whole episodes and it only comes back for one in season three, and only to further a side character’s story; not the main plot. Also the Firefly will help resolve the plot in five episodes time, but it’s just given a reintroduction there anyways. Why couldn’t this information have been condensed down and repackaged into another episode entirely? 

That’s what I mean by poor pacing. Tangled is not efficient in its storytelling. It drags things out only to give us rushed endings or no resolutions at all. Stop drop feeding info in the backgrounds of filler episodes where it’s not relevant and actually give us stories that focus on the plot, dang it. 

Once Again, Rapunzel is a Hypocrite 

Just like in Pascal’s Story during season one, Rapunzel is quick to show consideration for her oldest friend but can’t be bothered to admit fault to a teenager that she abused. One that she knows is currently facing horrendous and inhumane treatment inside of a jail cell right now and still does not give a damn. 

You can’t claim Rapunzel is a kind and compassionate person so long as Varian and his story exists.You just can’t. Because no matter how you slice it, being a minor means that there is a power imbalance in how adults and the government treats them. A power imbalance that is constantly being exploited by the mains. 

Conclusion

You won’t miss anything other than the shipwreck itself if you skipped the episode. Which is aggravating because it means it’s technically necessary to the on going story without actually adding anything substantial to it. It’s like the series opener all over again, only made worse by how boring and redundant it all is. Worst episode of season two; and now I just want to go watch Doctor Who instead. 

[prettywordsyouleft]

Band Sessions: Wonpil

Pairing: Kim Wonpil x reader

Genre: band au / university au / fluff

Warnings: none

Word count: 2305

Index: Jae | Sungjin | Young K | Wonpil | Dowoon

“Careful, Y/N!” Wonpil called out, stepping over to your side and pulling you back before you bumped into a library trolley stacked with books. You blinked at your sudden change in place and then back at the obstacle your boyfriend had prevented you from knocking into.

Shooting him a grateful smile, you chuckled lightly. “What would I do without you?”

“End up with a lot more bruises,” he concluded, shaking his head.

Wonpil loved everything about you except that you were clumsy. Over the past two years of dating, he had learned all there was to you. And mostly it was all good stuff. You were the type of person who grounded him in his weaknesses and empowered his strengths. And he’d like to say he did the same for you, however, most of the time he was simply saving you from impending doom.

For all the good that came with you, you also attracted all sorts of chaos. He would never understand how or why but he had witnessed it enough now that you were a walking time bomb. If he spent an entire day with you and no accidents occurred to you, then it wasn’t a miracle. It only meant the next time was guaranteed to have more than one.

Despite your bad luck, you were rather upbeat about it all. “Thankfully you saw it before me!”

“How you didn’t is beyond me,” he remarked and you merely laughed.

“You’re right, I should have seen that trolley. Could you imagine the mess I would have made?”

Wonpil nodded, biting his bottom lip to hold in his sigh. He could see it all too well because he had seen it in the past. And all the bruises that you had gained from sending books flying on the third floor of the campus library.

If he wasn’t with you, he sometimes worried about what could potentially happen. You had an innate knack for tripping over your own feet, and so setting you free on the university campus full of other students and potential hazards could easily give him anxiety if he let it manifest. However, he had had to learn that it usually worked out for the better. You were naturally accident-prone and it wasn’t something he could protect you from.

Even if he tried his best to do so whenever he was with you.

Wonpil never wanted to treat you like a damsel in distress. In fact, he knew you’d hate it if he did. Sure, there were moments where you liked whenever he fussed over you after sustaining an injury, but for the most part, you had already lived over two decades on this earth and survived without him before you started dating. He had to believe that you would be safe otherwise he was certain his mind would implode from constant worry.

“So it’s band practice night, right?” you mentioned when you both left the study session you had been at the library for, giving Wonpil another one of your infamous smiles.

For all the trouble you could cause to his heart and mind, your smiles made up for it. That and the kisses you gave. After kissing him briefly, Wonpil nodded. “And for you?”

“I have a date with Netflix,” you proudly stated and Wonpil playfully gasped.

“A date?!”

“Lee Minho and Woo Dohwan will keep me company whilst you hang with the boys.”

“I’m feeling the need to cancel,” he teased before brushing his lips over your forehead. “So long as you know that when the date is over they remain in their world and you come back to mine.”

“Hm,” you pondered innocently, pursing your lips with your thoughts. Wonpil leant in to kiss them, mirroring the grin you gave him when he pulled back. “Will you come over when you’re done?”

Although he had shared a bed many times with you now since your relationship progressed, Wonpil always felt his cheeks warm up with the idea of holding you all night long. If he was honest, he wanted to do that every night. Nodding at you happily in response, you then squeezed him tightly into a hug before stepping away, his hand quick to reach out to stop your departure right away.

He didn’t want to part ways just yet.

“Good, well I’ll go home and enjoy my dinner and dramas instead of causing any trouble at the studio. Have a good session with the boys.”

“I won’t be too long.”

You smirked. “Take your time; I have a few episodes to catch up on.”

You pried your hand out of his and turned rapidly, losing your balance and he lurched after you, stopping when you righted yourself. You snapped your head to look back at him with a breathy chuckle. “I’m alright! Love you!”

“Love you so much you will end me,” he mumbled, watching you intently until you disappeared around the side of the building.

As Wonpil walked the short distance from the campus to the studio, he almost wished he had brought you along with him instead. He knew how dangerous that was. You had tripped over the cord to his keyboard in his apartment more times than he could count, and the instrument was up against a wall. Wonpil thought of all the cords to the equipment in the studio and shuddered. There was a lot of expensive gear in there that he wouldn’t want you to damage or hurt yourself on.

Even you were aware of how much it would be like testing fate. When he had invited you in the past, you had come up with multiple excuses in the beginning before admitting you didn’t want to ruin things for the band with your accident-prone tendencies. So you had never seen the band outside of performing at their gigs and usually it didn’t bother him. Wonpil had a short attention span whenever he was with you, and wouldn’t be very productive if he spent all his time staring at you instead of working as a team with his fellow bandmates.

Sometimes though, he wanted to just bring you along and deal with the consequences. And lately, that urge had been growing. With your official two year anniversary two weeks away, he wanted nothing more than to perform the song that he had written for you then. He knew he would eventually bring it up on stage but something special like a private performance really stood out to him as a desire he wanted to fulfil. Especially after the playful session with Brian’s girlfriend recently, Wonpil yearned to have you sit on the studio couch away from all the equipment and play for you.

Surely that would be easy enough to do, right? Throughout practice that night, Wonpil stared at the empty couch and then at the door. The pathway from both was relatively clear and if he assisted you to your seat, nothing should eventuate. That way he could play for you and protect the studio from any potential mishap as well. It was a solid plan and after discussing it with his friends, Wonpil headed over to your apartment after practice feeling excited by his thoughts. It would be the perfect gift for your anniversary, especially with the restaurant reservation he had booked for later in the evening.

By the time you opened the door to your apartment and looking more than ready for bed in your sloth themed pyjamas, Wonpil was confident. Nothing would go wrong because you would have him to make it all go off without a hitch.

When your anniversary arrived, Wonpil wasn’t worried about anything going wrong today. In fact, all he felt all day long in your company was constant adoration and equal levels of disbelief that he had nurtured something this beautiful with you. He couldn’t understand just how lucky he had gotten, even if you spilled your drink on his shirt – thankfully it was only water – and tripped over and landed into his side awkwardly as you walked towards the studio. Usually, these moments would make him feel as if a bad omen was looming, yet today Wonpil felt more in control. He had saved you from falling and he would keep everything safe at the band session as well.

“Are you sure about this?” you questioned hesitantly, your expression clearly showing your concern. “I mean, this place is pretty special to you all.”

“All the more reason to have you come by finally.”

“I’m scared I’ll break something.”

Wonpil shook his head and smiled with assurance. “You will be fine and cause no harm. I mean, you’ve already done two things today and we’ve survived through them.”

Despite his encouragement, you didn’t look convinced, clinging onto Wonpil’s side when he twisted the handle to the studio. Thankfully, due to the entire afternoon yesterday he had spent decorating, your nerves eased when you saw the balloons and banner in front of you. Eyes now welling with tears, you gave Wonpil a watery smile and he led you inside, right over to the couch.

“Happy anniversary Wonpil and Y/N!” Sungjin exclaimed and Jae let off a party popper.

“Welcome to our humble abode,” Dowoon mentioned and then Brian slung his bass guitar over his head.

“You ready to play, Pil?”

Nodding as he shifted across to his keyboard and turned it on, they agreed to play a couple of songs you already knew first. It was a great experience. You sat and clapped, loosening off from all your previous tension and Wonpil felt bolder with his triumph. It had actually happened. You had come to a Day6 practice and nothing had gone wrong. He hadn’t even forgotten his lyrics once and when they played the song he had created for you, it was the most magical moment he had felt within this room. Everything worked in harmony, the music filling the space was some of the best he had ever had a part in making.

And once the room fell silent after the last guitar strum, you were clapping proudly, wiping away your tears momentarily before clapping again. That’s when it all started to go wrong.

“Oh, you don’t have to stand, Y/N!” Wonpil mentioned as you got up from the couch, his mind flashing with panic. Before he could understand anything else, you had already sat down and he was… falling too?

He watched as the keyboard stand he had knocked in his hurry lost its balance and fell into one of the amplifiers in the room. He also tripped over a cord in the process and ripped that out, causing a screech of static to bounce off the walls. Brian and Sungjin covered their ears and Jae got a fright, backing into another amp and knocked it over and popped several balloons in concession. It was like a domino effect and even Dowoon’s station was affected in some way before the entire room fell dead silent.

No one moved for a good minute or two. And then there was laughter.

The five distraught men looked in your direction as you now helplessly held your stomach, waving a free hand in their direction as if in attempt to dismiss your amusement. You sucked in a deep breath to try and settle your laughter but it rolled through you some more.

“I’m sorry!” you wheezed, trying to catch your breath. “It’s just this is exactly… what I have imagined so many times… if I was to ever come here… and for once it wasn’t me who caused the chaos!”

Sungjin couldn’t help but chuckle, though his was darker and pointedly aimed at Wonpil still sprawled on the floor. “You’re right. It wasn’t your fault at all, Y/N.”

“I have to admit when we prepared for tonight this wasn’t what I was expecting,” Jae announced and Brian moved to help Wonpil up.

“It looks like all your fears about Y/N and this place only ended up coming true by your hand instead.”

He was mortified, of course. Head lowered as he tried to calm down from the various emotions coursing throughout, Wonpil eventually cast his focus around the room. It was in a right state but for the most part, everything looked like it wasn’t broken.

And then he glanced in your direction, sighing heavily. More bravely than he expected, given the turn of events, you stepped over to his side and gave him a warm hug. “I loved everything about today.”

“I messed up just now.”

You tried to stifle another laugh. “Is it bad that I’m kind of relieved? After all this time, it’s always me causing calamity everywhere I go. We’ve been together for so long and it’s the first time I’ve been on the opposite side of things.”

“I’m glad it made you laugh.”

“Will everything be okay?” you asked of the other members as Brian checked over the amplifier behind Wonpil’s station.

“It should be. And if I remember correctly, you two have a dinner reservation to make.”

Wonpil sighed. “Maybe I should-”

“No,” you said firmly, taking his hand in yours. “Whatever else happens tonight is meant to occur. It’s our anniversary. Let’s shake up the town!”

“Not too much!” Jae pleaded as Wonpil’s smile slowly grew.

So maybe you were a little dangerous to be around, given how accidents followed you wherever you went. And now Wonpil was certain he couldn’t save you from them all. In fact, he could cause them himself too. Yet, your hand was in his and as you both fare-welled his band members, he realised that this was okay. You’d no doubt have many more accidents in the future to navigate together.

And a whole lot more to laugh about in the future whenever you thought over the crazy memories you made together.

_________________

Next: Dowoon

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[cynthiaandsamus]

Custom Toonami Block Week 73 Rundown

Code Geass: Lelouch and co. are still stuck in China and Xingke’s flipping out because the Chinese assholes are gonna kill the Empress and go with someone less problematic for their political marriage to Britannia’s creepily overaged prince. However Lelouch pulls out a Knightmare that’s basically the Twink version of the Gawain and busts everyone up as well as pulling a Father Cornello on them and letting the people know they’re all elitst 1% assholes that don’t care about them, which I suspect all countries probably know about their leaders but it sucks to hear it in a recording so riots show up all over China and CC Geass Flashes Anya to take her out so Britannia has to back out because the Chinese Hierarchy are now the least popular people in the world. So Xingke gets to be with his Empress and joins the Black Knights but Dietard wants the Empress to marry someone on their side so they can basically do the asshole move Britannia just tried to do but for them. All the girls are like ‘hey no’ and Lelouch is like “Oh hey Tamaki buddy, let’s go talk and get me the fuck out of here” so before Lelouch actually has to give Tamaki more lines and elevate him beyond the Black Knight’s Yamacha Shirley calls and Lelouch just straight up asks Shirley about love in a weirdly forced series of circumstance. But Shirley’s like “Yeah don’t fuck with love, don’t you love anyone?” and Lelouch is like “Yeah I do, Nunally!” and I don’t think that’s at all what Shirley meant but it does mean Lelouch sees that fighting for something beyond politics is powerful and agrees to not marry off the twelve year old girl, so that’s good. Lelouch decides to return home while they hunt down the Geass cult which is in China for some reason despite that being one of the like two places on earth Britannia doesn’t control and the Geass Cult largely being a Britannian affair. Meanwhile Sayoko is basically a Lelouch Vtuber at this point with her insanely accurate Lupin III mask of Lelouch and kisses Shirley so Shirley’s a little bit more gay than she was before and is not sure how to feel about that. When she’s about to tell the real Lelouch he kisses like a girl, Anya and Gino show up because we’re retreading the whole ‘sleeping with the enemy at school’ thing from the first season except with way less interesting enemies. Also the preview for the next episode is Lelouch dramatically talking about enemies finding out he’s Zero overtop footage of Shirley and Milly absolutely naked in a batthouse scene so I think we know what kind of episode that’ll be.

Inuyasha: The Panther Demon filler concludes with everyone meeting at the site where the Panther Master is being revived behind a strong barrier, if only someone just got a barrier upgrade to their sword, oh wait. But yeah everyone manages to free the hostages so even though Kagome’s jewel shards revives the Panther Master he’s still a zombie without a sacrifice which is weird since Naraku managed to completely revive the Band of Seven with one jewel shard each from skeletons and the Panther Lord has three shards so idk the rules here but yeah he steals the souls of his own men to revive and is Wind Scar Proof because he just is. It’s pretty cool to see him shooting his claws and lightning and shit but he’s too big and slow for it to be much of an interesting fight. Sesshomaru’s about to go full demon which would be interesting since we haven’t seen his full demon form since he lost his arm but in a neat bit of character development, Tenseiga calms his rage and tells him to use it instead. You get the feeling Sesshomaru only goes full demon when he flies off the handle and forgets about speed and strategy so him opting to not repeat the mistake he made against Inuyasha is pretty cool. Anyway Tenseiga heals the souls of the Panther Demons and drains their energy from the lord so he’s back to Zombie Cat Man which Inuyasha can Wind Scar because that’s what happens to villains on this show, all Wind Scars all the time. The Panthers don’t wanna fight anymore since their boss just killed them and tell Inuyasha to tell Sesshomaru the feud is over and they’re going back to the West. Honestly this is basically the same backstory they gave Kirinmaru in Yashahime so it’s funny for them to say they’re going back to the same place Kirinmaru is from, wonder if it’ll ever come up in Yashahime since most filler seems canon there.

Yu Yu Hakusho: Yusuke and Kuwabara continue the assault on Tarukane’s compound and basically plow through the lower demons easy since they’ve been fighting minor deities up to this point. It’s always pretty cool in Shonen to just have a few rounds to show how much power creep the heroes have had where certain things just don’t bother them anymore. Toguro murders a Chimera which has an oddly similar backstory to Nina from FMA and he seems really bummed about it but he’s like “Hey we’re both monsters made by humans telling us to do shit, so sorry for killing you bro”. And Tarukane basically sees Toguro is the next boss and is like “Yup time to scam some people off of this” and he sets up a betting ring for how far Yusuke and Co will get into his compound. This is kinda neat because it puts Tarukane in the weird position of betting against his own guards and hoping Yusuke will make it all the way to Toguro and then lose after everyone else has seen how awesome Yusuke is and bets on him. And funnily enough Sakyo’s in on the betting and he’s watched anime before so he knows to bet on the plucky teenagers with weird powers. So yeah Yusuke and Kuwabara finish plowing through the demons while Hiei kinda stalks them and remembers getting his eye surgery and wanting to help his sister but it’s kind of against spirit world rules for demons to just go plow through humans even if they’re scumbag humans so now Yusuke and Kuwabara have to go fight the Triad of boss demons Toguro has under him before Hiei busts in and just murders everyone for kidnapping his bird-loving jewel-crying little flower of a sister.

Fate Zero: So Kiritsugu can break Kayneth’s Terminator 2 Gaara defenses with rib bullets that just say ‘no’ to using magic and fucks his arrogant ass up. Saber and Lancer do some combo shenanigans to stab Caster right in the book and disrupt all his hentai tentacle demons but the book heals so idk why he can’t just make more. Kirei fucks up Maiya and Iris but didn’t double tap Maiya and DID double tap iris but she’s got Saber’s bullshit healing scabbard on her which no one knows about so Saber’s like “uhhh why are you healing” and Iris can’t tell her so she’s basically “Uhh internet?” Lancer comes in to save Kayneth’s worthless ass and tells Kiritsugu to stop being a dick to Saber because she’s pretty dope. But as usual for an early Fate encounter, no one dies and nothing of terrible consequence happens despite it being teased a couple times. I’ve noticed a trend with Fate that it really doesn’t like killing characters early so you’re basically guaranteed to have the first 2-3 major battles have a zero net gain/loss. Rider in UBW was probably the subversion to that since it happened crazy fast and anticlimactic but even that wasn’t till like ten episodes in.

Konosuba: So we finally meet Wiz the big booby Lich and Kazuma learns a new skill, both fun things. Also the gang gets a house to stay in after escapades with an army of haunted dolls and the most “I need to pee” in a horror setting since Corpse Party. But yeah, good progress this time honestly, the living in a stable gag was getting kind of old so Kazuma’s a bit stronger now and they have a home base so that’s pretty cool. Also Wiz is a Demon General or some shit but no one cares cause there ain’t no money in murdering busty zombie waifus.

Sailor Moon Crystal: So turns out Minako is Princess Serenity, except everyone who knows anything about Sailor Moon or indeed plot structure knows Sailor Moon is Princess Serenity, that’s like the Luke I Am Your Father of this series. But still turns out Minako has been guiding everyone with the power of video games but also thinks the power of friendship sucks and she’s gotta go do everything alone. This makes things super awkward because Mamoru’s pretty sure he was in love with the Princess but likes Usagi, now instead of running with this interesting thread of a reincarnation falling in love with someone new we’re gonna do the reveal that Usagi’s the princess and the whole ‘till death do us part’ part of marriage was just a metaphor and you’re stuck with one person no matter how many times you reincarnate. But yeah, Minako fights the bad guy on top of the tower but he has Naraku’s Barrier now and Minako doesn’t have the Red Tessaiga upgrade yet so she needs the power of friendship but this barrier is friendship-proof and this fight is basically a bunch of kids on the playground making up increasingly stupid powers that negate the other powers the other guy just made up. Anyway Tuxedo Mask shows up and is like “Holy shit Sailor Moon I love when you kiss me and kick ass, go get em sweetie I’ll hold your flower” and they kiss and Usagi has learned that if she just pretends she got this the power of her confidence will beat the bad guy. Unfortunately she does not got this and Tuxedo Mask has to pull a Piccolo and throw himself in front of the blast.

Durarara!!:  So now that we’ve had our climax for the arc we have a six month timeskip and everyone’s just kinda living life, Mika and Seiji are being clinically insane together, there’s cops harassing Celty to the point of mental breakdown (normal cop stuff) Shinra’s dad’s in town, Namie’s become Izaya’s secretary for blackmail shit, you know, normal stuff. Also there’s a katana-wielding maniac going around slashing people and Anri’s being bullied and sexually harassed to the point of mental collapse, normal stuff.

[tired-college-student-writing]

Here we go Loopty Loo

Summary: Graduation was supposed to signal the final time they all spent time together at UA, to show they have all grown into the Heros they dreamed of being.

It was supposed to be, but when has anything ever been easy for class 1-A?

Pt1 (HERE)

Pt2

___________________________________________

Loop #82

___________________________________________

Aizawa blinked sluggishly as he pulled his head from his podium and gazed across the classroom with critical eyes. The entire class appeared to slowly be waking up, some at their desks, some from the positions on the floor that they had collapsed into when their sudden lapse of consciousness hit.

Now, Normally, Aizawa would be on high alert in a situation like this, especially on the first day with his new first years, but this was different.

“I get to start with you guys this time,” Shinso piped up, staggering to his feet from where he had been laying in front of Momo’s desk, “Look like all 20 of us are here so no Gen Ed to worry about, or trying to hide anything from someone.”

“That’s a relief,” Mina sighed leaned back, in her seat, “Last time it was such a pain trying to act surprised at the LOV crashing things for Mei’s sake.”

“Momo,” Aizawa cut in, “If you will.”

The girl simply nodded and turned her back to the class as Sato and Shoji moved to stand with their backs to her, blocking her from view entirely as she pulled her shirt up and created the usual items, a large collapsible whiteboard and an array of colorful markers.

Deku silently handed her his lunch in exchange for the items as he and Iida quickly set up the offered materials.

“We all know the rules,” Iida started, writing a large 82 at the top of the board and quickly listing off the rules below, “but I’ll restate them anyways if you would like to complain about this take it up with Sero who forgot to inform us that he was a descendent of All for One in Loop #24 and ended up leaving the LOV quirkless after they tried to kidnap Denki.”

Aizawa simply zoned out at this point, knowing he’d be called in to inform the room of the changes he could recall at the end. It was ritual at this point, though they still could not figure out why they were looping.

When they had first started no one had said anything. Confused past their limits on why they felt like they were doing everything over again, trying hard not to change anything. It wasn’t until the third loop did they realize that while the rest of the world seemed to run as it always did, the nineteen teens and teacher were reliving the years the hero’s spent at high school over and over again.

Mineta seemed to be the only student in 1-A not to remember their previous loops, which made it easier kicking that annoying little grape to the curb the second he could justify it. Luckily during the third loop, Midoriya outshone his original first assessment making it easy for Aizawa to expel the lowest ranking member of their class. When Shinsou had made it into their class before the Sports festival that loop the boy had looked nearly sick.

On the fourth loop, they realized why when he was placed directly into their class at the beginning of the year and he nearly had a panic attack. Not that they could blame him, they had all gone through a similar fate earlier in the loops. Since then they rarely saw Mineta, but having the exact same class every time was never a guarantee.

In fact, there seemed to be very little rules to this whole looping business they have found themselves in.

The class was often the 20 that they had currently, but not always, sometimes having one or more of them fighting out from the Gen Ed classes, or even having another student placed with them.

They were often awoken on the first day before the first Quirk Assessment, but sometimes they wake up earlier, though rarely do they wake up after the assessment. While they had awoken as early as Aizawa’s third year in UA, leaving all of the students forced to grow up from age two with teenage memories, the latest they had ever woken up was after Deku and Bakugo’s first fight.

They almost always were planning their respective roles as students and teachers in UA training to be heroes, quirks, and appearances intact, but every once in a while…

“The Bakusquad have all switched quirks,” Mina called once the rules were listed, “I have Electrification, Denki got Hardening, Katsuki got Acid, Hanta got Explosion and Eijiro got Tape.”

Tenya nodded, “I believe that the Dekusquad is the same, with the exceptions of Tsu and Izuku, seeing as I have zero gravity.  Shoto and Ochaco?”

“Endeavor was very mad when my exhaust pipes popped out,” The still split haired boy said with a slight grin, “He was sure I’d be his perfect child with my appearance.”

“How pissed is he going to be when I use Half-Cold Half-Hot during the SPorts festival?” Ochaco asked, letting ice and fire form on her hands, curiously on the opposite sides to Shoto.

“Enough that we’ll want all the pictures,” Izuku chimed in, “I still have One for All, so no need to worry about that. Anyone else switch?”

Turns out that yes, this was a quirk shuffling loop. Shinsou, Kyoka, Ojiro, Momo, Toru, and Sato all kept their quirks the same, but while Koda and Shoji had kept their appearances, the tall boy now possessed Anivoice while the shy boy could transform all his limbs and even spout additional limbs if he wished.

The other switch that made the entire class start laughing however was when Dark Shadow made an appearance, only for the source not to be the blushing emo bird-like they all expected.

No, the shadow appeared from Yuga, the boy still twinkling with mirth as Fumikage mumbled the confirmation that he possessed Navel Laser.

Slowly the entire classroom came back to each other, after all this wasn’t the oddest thing they’ve had to deal with during the loops. No other relevant information surfaced, as the students voiced other minor changes they could remember.

Finally, they turned to Aizawa with a single question on their mind. He decided to draw it out some.

“Seems like I’m dating Tensei this time,” He hummed, “I also have a ring stashed away, but worried it would be weird to propose with Tenya in my class.”

Iida snorted, “Interesting, We’ll talk about how to ask him later. Now answer the question, sensei.”

“What question?”

“Oh come on Sensei,” Denki groaned, “Do you still have erasure?”

“Ah,” He hummed, scratching his cheek in thought, “Nope,”

Before his students could start pestering further, the door swung open and All Might popped in, “I AM HERE!”

“Yagi!” The teens cheered as the hero powered down, his thousand-watt smile not dimming in the slightest.

The skeleton of a man had apparently been looping with them from the start, even though it took them much longer to notice then it probably should have, even if the kind man had forgiven them entirely too easy for leaving him on his own until they all noticed in the twelfth loop. Now he was practically Aizawa’s co-homeroom teacher, encouraging all of the students to call him Toshinori, though they usually stuck to his family name as they did with Aizawa.

Izuku squinted at him, always the first to notice the difference with the older man, “You’re not quirkless.”

Heads snapped up as the blond man let out a full belly laugh, “Nope, it looks like the previous users shuffled quirks around a tiny bit, my boy.”

“Neat,” Aizawa said from behind the current #1. The man yelped, coughing blood slightly making the excited whispers from the students cease as they slowly turned back to where Aizawa still leaned against the podium on the other side of the room.

“Oh shit,” Shinsou mumbled, only to jump as another copy appears behind him, smacking the back of his head lightly.

“Language.”

“Copy,” Iida hummed, jotting it down, “Though it seems to work different then Ectoplasm’s clones. Anything else we should know?”  

One copy of the homeroom teacher shrugged, “Hizashi named me Agent Emulation this time.”

The one still leaning on the podium gave a slight smile, “I like Eraserhead better, but oh well.”

“Oh you’ve almost finished,” Toshinori said reading over the list, “This should be an interesting loop.”

“Just need your contribution, Toshi,” The clone next to All Might hummed, “So which of the six or seven quirks do you have on top of One for All?”

Instead of answering, the blond wrapped an arm around the clone and started floating towards the ceiling, earning a startled yelp as the Aizawa wrapped around him in shock.

Midoriya smiled sadly at the display, “Float, Nana’s quirk.”

After so many loops, there wasn’t much the group didn’t know about each other, so no one commented on the late-mentor, as Yagi slowly sank back to the floor with a chuckle as the clone dissipated in his grip with Aizawa pouting at the front of the room.

“Anything else to add?” he grumbled with no real heat.

“Oh!” Yagi said as if remembering, “I’m married in this go around!”

“Ooooh,” Toru cooed, “Who is it? Is it David or Tsukauchi this time?”

Yagi laughed a little uncomfortably, “Actually it’s Atsuhiro Sako, better known as Mr. Compass. It seems neither one of us is aware of the others… activities.”

“WHAT!?”

___________________________________________

So this is just a fun little story I’m gonna have fun with. Each chapter will be a loop or multiple loops exploring similar topics and just being all around fun and slightly cracky. 

Feel free to suggest an idea if you have one!

[aion-rsa]

Doctor Who Series 13: Jodie Whittaker Leaving Rumours, the Next Doctor, and the Future

https://ift.tt/2SweahO

Jodie Whittaker is fast approaching that three-season milestone at which most Doctors pull the inter-dimensional rip-cord and eject themselves from the TARDIS. Speculation has swirled around her, as it does for most Doctors, from the very start of her tenure, and now, more than ever, there’s the strong scent of Regeneration in the wind. So, will Whittaker leave at the close of series 13? And if so, will any of her companions remain to bridge the gap between eras? Might showrunner Chris Chibnall also hang up his sonic-shaped pen? The BBC is playing its cards characteristically close to its chest, so divining the answers to these questions is not unlike trying to unlock the mystery of the Doctor’s real name.

There was an ample reminder of the BBC’s zeal for secrecy when Who-newcomer and beloved Liverpudlian John Bishop – cast last year as companion Dan – was rebuked for revealing during an online Q&A that his character, too, would be Liverpudlian. If the BBC don’t want you to know that a Liverpudlian might be playing a Liverpudlian, then this is going to be a bumpy ride. But let’s strap in, brace for impact, and see what’s (or Who’s) out there…

Jodie Whittaker on leaving

Everyone has their favourite Doctors, and not-so favourite Doctors. Jodie Whittaker is not alone in having had love and scorn heaped upon her in equal measure, a phenomenon that has touched most actors to have taken on the role, with the possible exception of Tom Baker and David Tennant, who stand as almost deified in their respective eras.

It’s clear, though, that Jodie Whittaker has loved every moment of being the Doctor, and of being embraced by the show’s fandom, telling the Telegraph in November 2020: “If you bump into a Whovian, it genuinely makes both of your days. There’s something emotional, poetic and very humbling about being in the show, because you’re a little tiny jigsaw piece of something that is so precious to so many people.” It’s perhaps understandable, then, that her response to the speculation around her departure was to say: “To even question an end point would be too upsetting.”

Or, to parrot one of her predecessors: “I don’t want to go.”

Where’s the evidence?

Over the last eighteen months, rumours that Jodie Whittaker will be leaving after season 13 have been endlessly shared and repeated. These rumours were reported as fact by some media outlets earlier in the year, though the BBC has steadfastly refused either to confirm or deny them. It does, however, seem more likely than not that 13 will be 13’s last; a supposition based upon the ‘Who Rule of Three’ and the unignorable sound of drums gathering pitch and pace across the internet.

In the hunt for ‘evidence’, dead-ends and red-herrings abound. IMDb currently reveals no projects rumoured or in pre-production for Jodie Whittaker beyond her TARDIS tenure, but, then, actors keeping contractual secrets would be fools to release their schedules onto one of the most comprehensive entertainment databases ever to have existed. So no help there.

The Mirror newspaper recently reported that the front-cover of the 2022 Doctor Who annual would be Doctor-less for the first time in its 57-year-history. Could this be a clue? Not likely. The people at Penguin Random House – the annual’s publishers – made it clear that the thirteenth Doctor will feature heavily throughout the publication.  So whether the new cover is simply a radical redesign, a yielding to the purchasing power of this era of the show’s vocal detractors; or a shrewd marketing move designed to have the product promoted for free in the press, it doesn’t actually tell us very much about the likelihood of the 13th Doctor’s exit.

Peter Capaldi’s Trouser Clue

We might, however, be looking for clues in all the wrong places. Peter Capaldi deduced that he’d be handing over the TARDIS keys to a woman a few days before the BBC officially broke the news to him: thanks to his tailor.       

At a New York Comic Con panel in 2017, Capaldi told the audience: “I went into Paul Smiths, which is a very wonderful clothes shop in London where I buy my suits, and everybody knows me in there. And they said, ‘We just got a call,’ they said, ‘from the Doctor Who office saying, ‘Can we have a pair of [Peter’s] trousers, but with a waist size thirty?’ … And I thought, ‘Well, that can’t really be a man with a thirty-inch waist. That must be a lady then’.”

Staking out Jodie’s tailor probably won’t prove fruitful, though. Knowing the BBC, they’ve probably plugged that potential leak by sub-contracting Jodie’s wardrobe out to a mute grandma living alone in a fortress atop the Himalayas.    

Read more

TV

Doctor Who: the behind-the-scenes causes of regeneration

By Mark Harrison

TV

Doctor Who: Which New Doctors Are Now Canon?

By Chris Farnell

Will the Doctor Regenerate in 2022?

Series 13 will consist of eight episodes, set to begin airing later this year. The Mirror reports that there will be two specials in 2022, although it isn’t clear whether these will be in addition to this year’s 8,  or whether we’ll see a split of 6 episodes in 2021 with the 2 specials being held over for 2022. A special – Christmas Day, New Year’s Day or otherwise – has become the traditional arena for regeneration, so if Whittaker is leaving, it’s likely that her final scene will come at the end of that rumoured second special.

Many think that the greatest evidence for Whittaker remaining as the Doctor until at least 2023 is our proximity to Doctor Who‘s upcoming 60th anniversary. After all, it would seem a shame to bow out before a big milestone, and it could be daunting to saddle a new Doctor with spearheading such a significant celebration. Still, the timey-wimeyness of it all means that even should Whittaker leave in 2022 there’s no reason she couldn’t make an appearance in an anniversary episode, perhaps alongside a few other previous incarnations. And 2022 marks the 100th anniversary of the BBC itself, so it’s hard to imagine that the show won’t be doing something extra special to mark that, given that it owes its very existence and longevity to the broadcaster (Michael Grade notwithstanding). Whenever she leaves, 13 could easily have her cake and eat it.

Will Chris Chibnall leave after Series 13?

When Bradley Walsh and Tosin Cole left at the end of ‘Revolution of the Daleks‘, Mandip Gill’s Yaz stayed behind. Yaz has been one of the new era’s most underdeveloped characters, so it made sense that she would get her chance to shine and grow in a less crowded environment, sharing companion duties only with John Bishop’s newly teased Dan. But as her character and her story seems so intrinsically linked to the Doctor herself, with the promise of more in-depth exploration to come in series 13, when/if the Doctor leaves, will Yaz’s story also draw to a close? Will only Dan remain with a foot in two TARDISes? All speculation at this point, and it very much hinges on which direction the writers take Yaz in this next clutch of episodes.

Showrunner Chris Chibnall – a lifelong fan of the show and, prior to his appointment as big chief, a long-standing writer for both Doctor Who and Torchwood – has been at least as divisive a figure in Who fandom as 80s helmsman Jonathan Nathan-Turner. Rumours regarding his possible departure have circulated with just as much frequency as those surrounding Whittaker. When asked about series 13, Chris Chibnall told the Radio Times: “I do know I’m coming back for a third season. Yeah, absolutely.” Within those words, if you look hard enough, exists the implied absence of certainty around future seasons, but perhaps that’s getting rather too Da Vinci Code about the whole thing.

While the stewardships of previous showrunners Russell T. Davies and Steven Moffat spanned two Doctors each, this doesn’t mean that Chris Chibnall is guaranteed a crack at the 14th Doctor. Should Chibnall leave after season 13, among the writing team perhaps only Pete McTighe – who wrote ‘Kerblam!‘ And co-wrote ‘Praxeus‘ – has the experience to take over as showrunner, given his stint over-seeing the award-winning Australian prison-drama Wentworth. 

How might 13’s Regeneration Happen?

Each of the modern Doctors has met their end in the service of some great sacrifice, either to protect a companion or to save if not the universe then at least a world within it. It’s unlikely that 13’s exit will be any different. It’s simply a question of against whom or what she’ll be fighting when her time comes.

Though it may be too soon for the Master to be directly responsible for the undoing of yet another Doctor so soon after 12’s John-Simm-shaped downfall, it’s likely that the Master will at the very least influence the direction of 13’s regeneration. Sacha Dhawan has expressed enthusiasm at the idea of returning, though nothing, as you would expect, has yet been confirmed. Or denied.

The revelations in ‘The Timeless Children‘, controversial though they proved for some fans, are perhaps too epoch-shaking and era-defining not to play a part in 13’s swansong, and it may well be that the shadowy Division – the Time Lord’s very own version of Starfleet’s Section 31 – will be complicit in the Doctor’s fall.

Another question presents itself: now that the Doctor knows she has infinite regenerations, might it make her more reckless? Might she start to see her body more like an easily changeable suit than a thing of flesh and blood? Might she regenerate multiple times before becoming the 14th Doctor, a la The Curse of Fatal Death, and what on earth would we call the 14th Doctor – who wouldn’t really be the 14th Doctor at all – if that happened?          

Who’s in the running for the next Doctor?

Many of the same actors tipped as possible replacements near the end of Capaldi’s run have reappeared in the Regeneration rumour mill, including firm favourites Michaela Coel, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Michael Sheen, David Harewood, Richard Ayoade and the indefatigable Kris Marshall. Joining them this time are Line of Duty alumni Kelly MacDonald and Vicky McClure, and It’s a Sin front-man Olly Alexander. It could be that one of them, or none of them get the call. The next Doctor could just as easily be Jo Martin’s fugitive Doctor, who’s been hiding in plain sight all along.

Really though, as with all things connected with the show at this stage of its cycle: Who knows?

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Doctor Who Series 13 will air on BBC One later this year.

The post Doctor Who Series 13: Jodie Whittaker Leaving Rumours, the Next Doctor, and the Future appeared first on Den of Geek.

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