#i only called her out for her bullshit
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ty to @icedmatchawoatmilk13 for sending this to me! i may have gone a bit overboard but this was so much fun to fill out/think about BAHAHA💖 ill still never get over how perfect the song sarah smiles is for them...the lyrics AND the fact that its an alliteration...im gonna do an animatic about seb and clora to that song one day i swear 😩 ((blank template by oakwolves!))
#like fr....'i was fine just a guy living on my own/waiting for the sky to fall/till you called and changed it all doll' LIKE!!!!!#makes me think of seb just waiting/dreading for anne to die but then clora comes along and changes everything/saves anne AND him#ok sorry my squeeing and yapping about how perfect this song is for them is done#choccyart#clora clemons#the hardest part of this chart for me to fill out was the starting arguments one honestly...but i think theyre pretty even LOL#clora is the ROOT of their arguments usually and then seb just reacts to her bullshit......so its a 50/50 LMAO. cause and effect#also sebs pda WOULD be at 100% if not for clora LMAO#and sorry for making seb h*terosexual😔 honestly i cant see either of them with anyone else hes just clorasexual tbh#also if i could have given seb an autumn birthday I WOULD HAVE but i needed his bday to be early on in my fic...for reasons...#looking at aquarius personalities tho i DO think it unintentionally suits seb a lot#i wouldnt have made cloras bday in april either if i could have chosen freely i would have done either summer or december#but then again i just recently learned that the birth flower for april is DAISIES!! so its perfect🥰#youd think i would know this since my bday is also in april LMFAO i like how i only care/do this research when its about my ocs and not me#BAHAHAH priorities!!!
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Thinking about how in a single gameplay Jason (who already has blood on his hands and conscience from an incorrect call) can be faced with the decision to:
let Merwin face the vampires alone
stab Joey
shoot or abandon Clarice
shoot Rachel
lie to Nick about his chance of survival
leave Salim to die
And then thinking about how they find Balathu or Kurum half preserved and suffering and Salim decides they must put him out of his misery. And how when Jason automatically moves to follow through, Salim puts a hand on his gun and says “I’ll do it.”
It’s a choice born of practicality, not kindness. But to Jason, who’s made the call so many times he’s gone numb, it must also be a lifeline.
#it still astounds me that they dumped all that on one character#and i know they’re all under a lot of stress but salim’s the only one that doesn’t really turn on him for making the ‘wrong’ choice#the worst part is#even when you’re not playing as jason you have the option to talk him into or out of the death sentence#but ultimately the call is his to make and he takes full responsibility for it#and in that moment with kurum/balathu salim says ‘you don’t have to be the weapon this time. i’ll do it.’#i can only imagine what relief that brought jason#sorry y’all i’m back on my bullshit#house of ashes#jason kolchek#nathan merwin#joey gomez#clarice stokes#rachel king#nick kay#salim othman#jalim if you squint#addition bc i’m not redoing all those tags: i forgot he does tell rachel it’s on her if clarice turns
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As someone who is equally obsessed with Armand as I am with Ethel Cain at the moment, I am LIVING for your song/book comparisons. I saw a fan video of Claudia to Sun Bleached Flies which I had always likened to Armand and it really helped drive home the fact that they had so much in common, hence the tragic nature of their "relationship".
Its so sad they are SO similar except for the one key fact that Armand has become so passive whereas Claudia was a fighter. She never stopped standing up for herself even when she was faced with death and I wonder a lot about how much he must have envied her for that 😭
#I think in claudia he saw a spark of what amadeo used to be before marius crushed all the fight out of him and it was too much#and its so crushingly sad because out of everyone in the entire series she's the one#who would have actually called marius out on his bullshit if shed lived long enough to meet him#SHE would have fought for armand because shes the only one who could ever truly get it. but he had to kill her 😭#anonymous
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Sprite spoilers down here just in case, forge look away also some in the tags
AH SOMEONE WITH SMUG SHIZUKA PROFILE PIC (hello you wont see this thank you) LIKED A POST SO I WENT INTO THE FILES AND SHE DOES HAVE AN ALMOST COPY OF LEAS SMUG EXPRESSION I WASNT HALLUCINATING
shes just not on the sprite resource for some reason the little asshole was hiding from me
#she does however not look up like lea she looks straight to my innitial bullshit still holds up#since i think this expression only shows up in the dlc i could even make an argument this is her slowly becoming more comfortable#as she is out of that hellhole of a situation and is slowly healing with the ones she loves#crosscode#crosscode spoilers#crosscode shizuka#look i know i posted a lot in a row but this is important#anyway why is there a folder in the game files called shizuka that has a bunch of sound files in it with all japanese phrases#said in a idk how to describe it squeaky exaggerated anime like way#why is this here why am i finding this am i going to be killed#this is almost as bad as finding that one sprite on lukas and lukes sprite sheets#WHY IS IT THERE WHY IS HE STARING AT ME LIKE THAT LEAVE ME ALONE
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So was anyone gonna tell me that there was a second sucker for love or was i supposed to find that they made Shubby into a hot goat woman while looking for Nyanlathoteps dress to put Kayne in???
#Guys#guys#i am gay#i am a homosexual#i only saw her face when looking for refs so when i searched her up i just yelled massive tits!!! while on call with friends#Soup speaks the bullshit#today is just me and my gayness winning#first i get hot hag women in dnd and now this#My ma has started keeping track of how many times i try to “pimp myself out to scary women”#Its not a good amount#im sorry im gay and have questionable taste
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work was such a shitshow in the morning that it trailed into the afternoon and evening and now im just hit with this sinking dread of having to go and do it all again tomorrow
#racing!#a blind lady came to the gym and her ride was set to pick her up right when my shift was starting#and i was asked to go retrieve her from the massage chairs#and she didnt want to leave bc she couldnt work out bc she didnt get a personal trainer (we dont have any at this location)#(she didnt call before her arrival so we couldnt even try to set something up)#and she made me call her driver to try and reschedule her pickup but it was too late and she was like well its not my problem if they come#and im like WELL DONT MAKE IT MY PROBLEM THEN??? in my head but outwardly im on the brink of tears#she finally gets up and puts shoes on and i lead her up to the front desk bc her fucking driver is there#and she weasles some free drinks out of me bc i didnt realize she gave us a nonfunctional debit csrd to put on file#so we couldnt charge her for anything#and as i was waiting for her to gether her stuff so we could walk her to her car she hounds me to try and get gym merch that i dont gave#like we dont. carry any. all we have is employee uniform shirts. she said she would call the ceo and make him give her an employee shirt.#i dont say anything except oh maam your ride is here! and when she got in the car she said oh i wont call before i come in next time either#lets do this all over again it was so fun :) and i had to try not to audibly start crying#and after i got back in i helped a guy cancel his membership#and informed him we had to charge him for this month bc he missed the cutoff date and he cussed me out and that time i did actually cry#quite visibly. he got uncomfortable and walked away but loudly said This Is Bullshit as he did which only made me more upset somehow. hell#and then i was overwhelmed and overstimulated and Fucking Hungry bc i couldnt go on break until way later than normal (it was busy and loud)#and i had to go buy a drink bc the doordasher forgot mine and the line at the store was short but it took fucking 20 minutes to check out#bc One Guy was holding up the line and then i only had 10 minutes left to eat and try to recover#didnt recover! and then i went back in and got overstimulated again for the next Three Hours
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hrjjwnnynfntmfntmdnrrkbfjrbtrkbtb
#what is it with my family and not feeling like i can make any of my own choices#my dad reaaaalllyyyy thinks i should go to the rink tomorrow morning because people there want to see me#and like yes they do but since when was this your decision to make dad#Since always honestly#with my dad it’s like i can never make a decision for myself without feeling like im letting someone down#At least my mom is fucking mask off about it so i resist her more out of spite. that’s easier#my dad will never explicitly force me into something but he will always put me in situations where i don’t feel like i have a choice anyway#Ofc bc now if im here tomorrow morning when my mom wakes up she’s going to question why i decided not to go to the rink#so my choice in the matter is gone because it’s no longer go or not go#it’s go or disappoint everyone and have your actions questioned and judged#I’m not a human being in this house#even when it comes to the most minor decision making over the most minute things#i am an object whose purpose is to please others#and they still have the audacity to turn back around and call me indecisive. You do not give me the ability to decide#You manipulate every decision i could make into an inescapable catch#like screw you and everything you have ever said about me#It’s all bullshit#stop lying to me about who i am#as if i have any reason to ever believe you. as if you know better than i do#and yes if this were only about the current situation i would be heinously overreacting#but you have to understand this is not just about this situation#this is just a small example of the dynamic i dealt with my entire life while i lived here#and that’s why it upsets me so much#as an adult i’m aware of it and i refuse to fall for it anymore#but as a kid? the damage this did to my self esteem and boundaries was immeasurable#and as an adult i bear the grudge i was not allowed to hold as a child#that’s why a situation so small as this irks me so intensely#venting tag#cherry speaks
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i hope the one art teacher who protected me in high school but was otherwise despised by everyone else is doing ok
#sorry for the weird post but i got nostalgic and sentimental in the showe#i dont reallyyyy miss her classes and i doubt she remembers me#hell idek if she did it bc she cared or bc she hated the guy who was bullying me in her class#but she was like. the only teacher i ever had in that entire high school who Tried#she let me manage my adhd by letting me draw while listening to her lesson and told off ppl who snapped at me for it#she moved me away from that guy and yelled at him when he started verbally abusing me#she and i would talk after class and she was genuinely just nice to me#and i dont think i was her teachers pet (i actually did kinda poorly in her class iirc) but like. damn#any other teacher either told me to deal with it or made a big deal out of moving me and that being a hassle#but she like. actually meaningfully tried to stop it on my behalf#ppl were absolutely brutal to her. she was fat and had a low voice and ppl were calling her evil and mentally unstable and her lessons were#stupid bullshit#when they were actually so interesting. im sad her photography class was ruined for me bc it was genuinely interesting#and that wasnt her fault it got ruined. but she did it and she was yelled at and treated like dogshit#shes not on the school directory anymore. i hope shes doing okay. i hope she got a better job where shes respected more#echoed voice
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Finally fixating on some nugget relationships that aren't horrible for everyone I love friendship <3
#rat rambles#I feel like Ive mentioned them before but Ive been rotaing them in my head so hard today#jacob dexter besties arc <3333 and also piper ig :/#they're all friends I just have favorite children (even tho Im pretty sure piper is the one whos been around the longest)#theres nothing super deep going on with them they're just bros who like to hang out drink and have game nights sometimes#but I likes them. they're silly :3#I need to dexter post more often yes they basically do nothing but be their friends supply guy but I love her sm#I used to be painfully neutral on him until I started lor at which point she grew on me hard and its only been getting worse#shes a mess who is squeamish and easily grossed out (rip bozo) and also an alcoholic (rip bozo) and also loves gambling (rip bozo)#hes surprisingly not doing as bad as youd think theyd be considering the everything tho#mostly because theyre good with tech and also are very good at breaking rules without getting too punished#but also because of their friends ig. eyeroll.#jacob also has a lot of bullshit going on as he is one of the poor souls who for a time caught yuri's attention but hes managing#and by managing I do mean on the verge of a breakdown at all times and holding on by a thread because he does not need to have juliet's#wrath added to his ever growing list of problems and traumatic events#again having positive relationships does also help but hes easily the least stable of the crew#to be clear theyre not like. super close? they hang out and play games and shit but they generally treat their hang outs as escapism so#they rarely talk much abt themselves on a personal level with eachother#which is fine they still value eachother a lot and genuinely enjoy eachothers company#although they are a bit recklessly fond of eachother considering their situation Id say. thankfully they dont get punished for it tho.#if one of them Had died and not instantly got brought back I do think the other two would fully lose it#the closest this ever got to happening in game was me not realizing dexter (level 5 employee btw) had gotten eaten by the wolf#and almost moving to the next day before realizing she had died#and do note this was like at the point in the game where I was just about done preparing to start the last 5 days this was Late late game#but autism be damned my boy can fuck up one of the easiest waws#(not a boy tbc)#honestly its kind of a miracle I never let piper die I Really didnt care abt him before the other two boosted him by proxy#well tbf he was for a good while one of like. two ppl I had in training. and they also are in little red gear. so they Did have value. ig.#piper comes from category of nugget I had in my early game that I liked to call bodyguards#basically I had one or two guys per department who actually did work and then another guy or two to be extra fire power
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Soulmate AU of sorts? Like, every subject of Ymir gets visited by the Godfather at some point during their life. The Godfather comes to the person “at the right moment” with a few ring models for the person to choose within (each ring is made with the respective person in mind and their personality/life, all made by Ymir herself). The one ring that gets chosen is then given to their soulmate by the Godfather. The whole idea is for the person to get their ring back from their soulmate when they meet (if they meet) (and for the soulmate to get their ring too from the person).
NO RING LOOKS ALIKE. EACH ONE IS UNIQUE, MADE SPECIFICALLY FOR THE PERSON.
IF the person doesn't like any of the rings, they can describe their dream ring to the Godfather. However, in that scenario the person doesn't get to see the ring until they meet their soulmate. IF the person refuses to choose a ring altogether (say they either don't believe in soulmates or have no interest in taking part of this), the Godfather decides for them. That's for in case the person changes their mind at some point.
The soulmates don't have to be strictly romantic or anything like that. The pair(s) are decided based on how compatible the two are, made by Ymir herself to help her subjects avoy the pain and suffering she went through for loving the king. They're perfectly made for each other so to say. Still, Ymir doesn't force anything on anyone. She just wants to help.
IF the soulmate isn't a subject of Ymir, then they don't get to choose a ring (for example, Niccolo doesn't choose a ring BUT gets Sasha’s ring. And Sasha doesn't get any ring, but she gets to choose hers). Theoretically speaking someone can have more soulmates, but the cases are extremely rare.
No ranting about JeanMarco with this one, mostly because I don't have much to say on the matter lol. Marco gets Jean's ring within a few weeks prior to enrolling and Jean gets Marco's ring two years into their training (because let's be honest, Jean at the very beginning wouldn't be ready for the realization that Marco's his soulmate. Jean after two whole years of friendship though?). I don't see Marco going around asking people about their ring and stuff, so he keeps it ‘secret’(he just doesn't open the subject). Is only when Jean goes to Marco and shows him the ring Godfather gave him that, you know, pieces start to fall into place. Marco doesn't even let Jean rant excitedly about it, he straight up pulls out the ring out of the pocket and pushes it in Jean's face. The whole situation is chaotic. I think. Too tired to think properly rn.
#Armin got a ring similar to the one Annie already have and it doesn't take them long to find out they're soulmates. Annie shoots him down#immediately saying she wants nothing to do with that bullshit. Their whole situation is a mess#Ymir doesn't even wait around the second she knows she wants to be with Historia she shows her the ring. No hesitation#Mikasa actually gets her ring really late. Like years later late. Never gets the chace to ask Eren if the ring is his#Eren meanwhile got the ring even before meeting Mikasa#I can't remember if Niccolo is a subject of Ymir or not lol. But yk I was only giving an example anyway#I think Sasha might have two soulmates. Niccolo and Connie. But yk Connie is extremely platonic#I don't know man this came out of nowhere don't ask me too many things about this au#aot#snk#Should I even tag this with characters?#jeanmarco#soulmates#soulmate au#JeanMarco Soulmate AU#Snk soulmate au#Btw I had no clue how to call the guy so I'm using Godfather for now. I'm open to suggestions tho
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tfw your rareship has a tag populated entirely by one singular person and they seem a bit annoying =_=
#when the hypercompetent willfully ignorant lesbian x still hypercompetent on occasion failgirl whose totally her type ship has less fanart#than the same lesbian x that same failgirls younger brother. is. wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee#this is the shit you find out about trying to stay up to date on quanxi fanarts outside the ‘actual vetted ok people’ bubble though i guess#well specifically in terms of risque-to-pornographic fanart lmfao#i guess going chaste with it would significantly reduce the quantity of just completely reprehensible bullshit i’ve lain witness too#anyways if that one quanxbeni shipper sees this: sorry i called you a bit annoying to be fair i don’t think anyone would look flattering whe#when ones only exposure to them is skimming all of their fandom shipping posts in a row lmfao
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Honestly tho it's the "I don't love you" and "every time I said it was just automatic impulse" that's got me the most messed up. Like u couldn't even let me down softly by saying it just wasn't working out? You had to essentially tell me the whole thing was a lie??? After I TOLD you I had trust issues and felt like everyone is just going to leave me in the end???
Way to make me feel unlovable lol
#speculation nation#tho of course what has me the Angriest is her breaking up with me over text. that takes the biggest fucking cake.#idk there was a lot said in all of that bullshit. including her admitting she was probably self-sabotaging.#i hate being used as a tool of self harm. being shoved away as a form of self sabotage.#like if youre gonna be a messed up bastard whyd you have to include me in it??? fucking bitch.#i let her know just how pissed off i was. called her every applicable name under the sun.#selfish coward bastard asshole piece of shit bitch. tossed in a few Fuck Yous as well. fully deserved.#and yet she just kept on with that sniveling 'im so sorry' and 'i know ill regret this' and 'i just have to do it'#you didnt have to do anything. you couldve had it poly but you just couldnt look last your infatuation.#also her calling days old feelings Love. as if that kind of immediate and extreme kind of feelings arent By Definition infatuation.#she's in the honeymoon faze. found her nice new fixation. said they understand each other like no one else.#but it's only been Days. how well can you know a person in that time? not very well usually.#threw out a nearly 6 month long relationship just like that. what a joke.#and when she'd brought up just last thursday that our 6 months was coming up (on the 23rd)#and mentioned wanting to do something to celebrate it...#im just like. i guess you really cant know everything in a person huh?#i knew she wasnt perfect but she always treated me so kindly. so considerate and attentive.#who knew she'd be the type to drop me for the new shiny fixation? i sure didnt expect it.#id started to trust that she genuinely liked me. even if i didnt understand why.#but now im back to square one. wondering whether anyone can ever like the true me.#i know theres gotta be someone out there for me. i just... have to find them.
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#yeah man.. had a few hours of back and forth argument with my friend..idk really if i want to call her that now#but it was an eye opening mess.. it all started with her sending me dreadwolf trailer and i said it's all promises talk#and literally it went downhill from there she claimed that it's been announced like a year ago i said it's been in development for years#it then went to a fandom talk and how she thinks people in fandoms are pathetic and etc bullshit#how being a fan of something is not normal#and being invested in fiction and vgs and fandoms is something ppl with little responsibility do..#man i can't even write out all the stuff she said i genuinely felt so bad after this argument#i don't think i ever want to speak to her again#people having fun in her understanding is pathetic childish and a sign of a person not having enough responsibilities in life??#jfc i never realized just how truly toxic she is...#i mean deep down i did i just didn't want to admit to myself.. her general attitude to people being fans of something is just sickening#i'm determined to not write to her at all unless she reaches out which i doubt#she just shitted on everything despite me trying to expain how fiction can even literally save people#i tried expaining to her why some people are telling other ppl to not buy dreadwolf and pirate instead#i said about the fucked over emplyees of bioware and what she said was#it's a cruel world but idgaf it's business cry me a river - something along these lines#she literally has zero empathy i understand it now#the way she only selectively cares about wars going on in world#i said if people can boycott companies that support wars why cant they also support people who suffer from companies#she said and i qoute 'to compare war to people being fired wow that's something'#i was not comparing i just tried to find empathy in her to no avail#anyways.. i am so dissapointed in her and in myself that i didn't see this sooner#tbd
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utterly cannot stand the type of post thats like "what are the female characters you like" and i KNOW it's not the fault of the people who make those posts i know they only do it because 95% of this site's blorbos are men. but i hate it anyway. like really the only way you can get fandom people to talk about women is to explicitly tell them to talk about women. and it always comes off so disingenuous because i KNOW most people reblogging those posts would never say those characters on a generic "what are your favorite characters" post. like it's all just so bleak :/
#like. tumblr user on an average blorbo tag post: omg dean <3#tumblr user on average Woman Blorbo post: well i really like woman 2 from netflix original bullshit show#and i don't mean to suggest these people DON'T really like woman 2 from that show. i just think like.#well i've seen ur posts and 80% of them are about a man. and you only ever even mention HER in relation to men or when specifically prompte#like. idk. i promise female characters are interesting when you take off the patriarchy goggles. i promise they are also usually much bette#written than whatever man you're obsessed with. i promise you.#like. clary gets almost no love from this site at large but she is probably one of cassie's most complex characters ever#meanwhile everyone here lovesssss will herondale. and i won't continue that thought lest i be blacklisted#so you see what i'm saying.#most tumblr users could not defend their love of a female character against their raw posting data#beth.txt#don't mean to suggest i never like male charaters we all know i have my guys#but i don't think i talk about men more than women. actually lets review the characters of the year#i'd start with danny obviously danny was huge in january#alina. alex. liv. i'd say call tamara and aaron all count#livvy ty dru and kit are a contant and don't need to be included in the data. but if they were it'd even out anyway#ok so that's 4 men and 3 women. not a bad ratio#didn't mean to make this post about me but well it is my post so yk. whatever#anyway. basically some of you could stand to get really weird about a female character sometime. sick of your deans and whatnot!
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...Okay well damn, season 2 is way better than 1 was. I'm actually getting kind of invested now
#ignore me#SW HS exchange#just finished s2e6. the one that introduces Barriss? and that was just a genuinely good episode#along with the one before it tbh! for such an action-heavy arc this has been a surprisingly attention-holding series of episodes#and even before that. the season opened with more of this Cad Bane bounty hunter guy and I'm REALLY liking him#every episode with him so far has been a winner#really the only sorta-mediocre episode this season has been the unconnected one-off (of course) with Padme acting as a spy#and that one would also have been good honestly if I hadn't been cackling like a hyena the whole time at Anakin's horrendous romantic drama#the opening scene of that ep was GENUINELY so sweet and nice with him bringing Padme dinner and them being all mushy together#but then the HYPOCRITE OF ALL TIME tells her that he has to go do Jedi stuff because ''duty comes first''#AS IF HE HADN'T JUST SPENT A WHOLE EPISODE LAST SEASON WHINING TO HER ABOUT HOW SHE CHOOSES HER SENATE DUTIES OVER HIM#AND THEN HE TRIES TO BOSS HER AROUND AND KEEP HER FROM GETTING INVOLVED BUT SHE'S JUST LIKE ''actually eff off I do what I want''#(which had me cheering out loud tbh. thank god Padme at least calls him out on his bullshit)#and then she kinda goes out of her way to piss him off and has a whole flirty thing with her old pal that's in love with her and ghdsjfa#it's so stupid and cringe and I couldn't help but love and hate it in equal measure
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got to kind of tell off my homophobic and transphobic conservative aunt
#so my stepdad/aunt's dad was a veteran and passed away a few years ago#so my aunt posted a bunch of posts about memorial day on monday#which is totally fine and i have no problems with that#but then she posts a meme about memorial day only being 1 day and lgbtq+ people getting a whole month#i about lost my shit and even my stepdad was pissed and was like ummm lgbtq+ people have also died for this country in the military#so i told her off about it#and also like why are you mad we get a whole month when you should be mad at the person in control of making memorial day a whole month?#and would she be mad that asian and pacific islanders get a whole month when her sister is adopted from Thailand?#and she is also conservative which is bonkers but that's another story#anyways it was nice to finally call her out on her bullshit#kfi txt
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