#i never think about it until days like this and then we're like “oh whoa. oh jesus. oh wow.”

[scummy-writes]

!!!!! BNUUY

He is so happy abt havin his bunny hehehehe

Thank you honey, you always draw me such wonderful pictures 🥺 and leave the sweetest tags youre tryin to make me cry AHAHHA thank you honey 🥺

what a cute little rabbit!!

happy birthday @scummy-writes !!!

[heartfullofleeches]

[Angst]

Childhood Best Friends with a small age gap- two or three years, nothing crazy- but it means everything as they age.

It was hard for them to make friends their age when you first met. They liked things that were too "childish" for their peers - things another child who lived not to far away adored. They'd seen each other on the way to school, but they didn't interact frequently due to their difference in grade.

Until that day-

"Whoa...Cool backpack. You like that show too?"

"Thanks... I'm thinking of getting a new one though... Do you want me to ask my parents if you can have it?"

"What?! It looks fine to me... Why are you getting rid of it?"

"My friends called me a baby... I won't be able to go back to class without everyone laughing at me unless I get a better one."

"That's silly!.... It's on right now... Wanna watch it with me?"

The two were inseparable from then on- School hindered the time they had to see each other each morning, but as soon as it let out - both ran to meet with their new best friend. The elder of the pair was often mocked and teased for their choice, but they could hardly care anymore. They had someone who'd stick by their side to the very end - childish fixations and all.

Years went on and they made new friends. It happens. More obstacles began piling up throughout - chipping away at the few hours they scarcely had to begin with. Studying, Hobbies, balancing days between hanging out with other friend groups and the person who once meant the world. They tried to make things works, but nothing went to plan-

"Is it alright if Y/n comes with us tonight?"

"Y/N? Aren't they're too young to see this movie? We shouldn't be responsible if they have night terrors or something.."

"They aren't that young... Are they?"

They never thought about it before. You were so close in age as kids it never hit them that as you grew that little gap drew a bridge between you - and it was easier to let you go than finding an alternative.

"Hey, Dude! Are we still on for this weekend? I can't believe they're making a reboot after all this time!.."

"Are my messages going through? You haven't responded in a while... I saw you outside school yesterday and yelled your name, but....."

"Did I do something wrong?"

"Hey."

"You're hanging out with them today? Did you forget about my birthday?...."

"You removed me off your list of friends...We're still friends, right?"

"Let me alone. I'm sick of being your babysitter. Go find friends your own age and stay away from mine."

And that was the end of things.

College cames around and their live became relatively tame. Their thoughts drifted to that childhood friend of theirs every now and again, but between school and partying with the new friends they had made - those memories faded to the back of their mind.

An acquaintance asks them to help show some new faces around the campus. One sticks out to them amongst the crowd. It's you. What do they say to you after all these years? You don't look sad to see them. Nor angry. Intact - you look..

Relieved.

Pulling them aside at the end of the tour, you free yourself from the burden that's weighted down on you since they left you.

"I'm sorry."

"It was never my intention to hold you back. Overtime I realized I was just that annoying kid who clung onto you because I thought you were my first and only friend...When you never felt that way about me. I'm sorry for taking that away from you. If our paths cross again, I promise I won't even look at you."

After being abandoned by your best friend- the person you looked up to most, you matured well beyond your years in hopes that would make you like them again. Overtime, you gave up that goal, but others could see how you've changed.

"Isn't that.... Y/n?.."

"Oh, man- It is! You guys were glued at the hip before we became teens."

"They're..kinda cute... Do you still have their number?"

All this time apart, a feeling long forgotten resurged inside them. The need to protect you. You didn't know these people like they did. You shouldn't be going to parties with them, getting to know and befriend them. They'll only hurt you - worse than they had. They never should have said goodbye to you- They should have allowed the feelings they were so scared to have, but had always been there develop and blossom naturally until you both were adults ready to move on to that stage in your friendship.

They know you best. No matter how much you grow as a person, you're still the same.

"That's a cute Keychain, Y/n!"

"Thanks! I've loved this show since I was a kid!"

They'll prove it to you.

[luvismenu]

Promise You - JJK

✎ 22 ready — index 〃

note: we're almost there!!!

♡ — permanent taglist: @jksctrl @ari420sstuff @blluee1128 @https-mei @jkvias @blaricee @iheartchanelle @whoa-jo @wobblewobble822 @jkslvsnella @clxssy1997 @nikkinikj @kayleesaltzmann @rrosiitas @naurnonope @lola75111 @somehowukook @redcherrykook @parkinglot-nights @deluluisdasolulu @minghaosimp @hyeon-yi @ririkookiemonster @svtrighthereworld @jmscaffeine @trinityxsope @taetaecatboy @butnotmontana @joyofbebbanburg @elinaki92 @sweetmimosa28

series taglist: @daisies-and-dandelionpuffs @jksgirlhere @vrsltz @jaytheatiny

Today is the day.

You’re going to confess your feelings to Jungkook.

If you really think about it, you’ve always liked him. But you never wanted to cross the line between friendship and something more.

He’s handsome, hot, and honestly the perfect man. But none of that ever mattered to you, not until after your first breakup. That’s when you really noticed him, the way he took care of you, doing everything he could to make sure you were okay.

You even remember the moments when you wanted to kiss him.

So many times.

But you didn’t. You told yourself it wasn’t right.

Falling for your best friend just because he cared about you? It felt silly, like you were confusing kindness with something more. So, you ignored those feelings, convincing yourself that it was just your lowest point.

But this?

This is different.

Now, you like him— you love him.

You want him.

The feelings never left. They’ve always lingered, simmering under the surface. You can’t even count the times you almost took the risk, almost crossed that invisible line between friends.

And then, when you found out he was going out with a co-worker, it hit you like a punch to the chest. That was your last straw. It was all the confirmation you needed.

You like him more than you don’t want to.

“___! What are you thinking about?” Taehyung shouts from the living room, where everyone’s busy chatting away.

“Oh… uh, where's—”

“Jungkook's on his way,” Yoongi interrupts as he strolls into the kitchen and snatches the bag of chips sitting next to you on the counter. “He’s sending his mom off today.”

You grab a drink and follow Yoongi back to the living room.

“How are you feeling, baby cousin?” Jin asks, flashing a grin while trying to swipe Yoongi’s chips, only to get his hand smacked away.

“I’m finee! And don’t call me that,” you say with a glare, earning a round of chuckles from the others.

“I heard today is the confession day,” Jimin teases, raising a brow with a mischievous grin.

You gasp and whip your head toward Taehyung. “You told them!?”

He nearly chokes on the cookies he’s stuffing into his mouth, throwing his hands up in defense. “It slipped out!”

You narrow your eyes at him, but Taehyung just shrugs it off and slings an arm over your shoulder.

“It’ll be fine, ___.” He gives you a reassuring squeeze. “Jungkook’s been dying to confess, so of course—”

The room falls into stunned silence, everyone glaring at Taehyung.

“I mean—” He stammers, backing off with a nervous chuckle as the others let out collective sighs.

“Oh, come on!” Taehyung groans dramatically, tossing his head back. “I’m tired of keeping it a secret! Please don’t tell Jungkook I said that.”

“He... likes me back?” you murmur, eyes wide in disbelief.

“Surprise, surprise,” Hoseok says with a sheepish smile, scratching the back of his neck.

Your heart is racing.

This can’t be real.

“Does he really—”

The front door creaks open, and all heads turn toward it. Jungkook steps inside, holding a large box in his hands. His brows knit together in confusion as he takes in everyone’s strange expressions.

“What?” he asks, scanning the room. His gaze lands on you, and for a moment, he freezes.

Then his eyes soften, and there’s a flicker of relief on his face, like seeing you made everything better.

“What’s in the box?” Jin breaks the silence,

Jungkook glances down at the box, then back at you. “Mom’s homemade snacks,” he replies, and the room lights up with excitement.

Taehyung immediately tries to snatch the box, but Jungkook pulls it away just in time. “They’re for everyone,” he says with a playful glare, handing the box to Taehyung, who grins in triumph.

The next hour flies by in a blur of chatter and laughter, everyone enjoying the snacks and each other’s company. You and Jungkook share quick glances, the awkwardness lingering in the air between you.

“We should get going now,” Namjoon announces, standing up.

“What? But we just got here!” Taehyung whines, crossing his arms which causes Namjoon to shoot him a warning look.

“Did you forget about the important business?” Hoseok adds through gritted teeth, giving Taehyung a glare.

Taehyung freezes for a second before clapping his hands together. “Oh! Right! Haha, of course, I didn’t forget. Yeah, we should totally go.”

You suppress a smile, knowing exactly what they’re up to.

As the group starts to leave, Namjoon gives you a small nod, as if to say, Now’s your chance.

You smile back, watching them file out the door one by one, until only you and Jungkook are left behind.

“...”

“...”

“I have to tell—”

“I have to tell you—”

You both speak at the same time, then stop, exchanging small chuckles.

“I’m ready to talk, Kook,” you say, and he swears his heart skips a beat.

“___,” he begins, his voice softer now. You meet his gaze, waiting for him to continue. “I need to tell you something first.”

“But, I—”

“Please?” he interrupts. “I need to say this before whatever it is you have to tell me. If I don’t do it now...” He sighs deeply, as if trying to gather courage. “I just... need to.”

You nod, giving him the space to continue.

He takes a deep breath, shifting on his feet nervously. His hands twitch like he wants to reach for you but thinks better of it.

“I’ve liked you for a long time. Well.. I.. love you, ___” Jungkook admits, his voice almost a whisper. “I kept it to myself because I didn’t want to ruin what we have. I thought... if I told you and you didn’t feel the same, it would change everything. And I didn’t want to lose you— I don't want to lose you”

Your breath catches, and he looks at you with those soft, vulnerable eyes you’ve rarely seen.

“You mean so much to me, ___” he continues. “More than I ever let you know. And it’s okay if you don’t like me back, really. I just...”

He pauses, biting his lip, as if he’s still debating whether this was a good idea. “I’ll always be your best friend, no matter what. That won’t ever change. I just needed to be honest with you, because I’ve kept it in for too long.”

“I’m sorry I took so long,” Jungkook says softly, his gaze dropping to the floor for a moment before meeting yours again. “I kept waiting for you to do it first, thinking maybe... maybe that would mean you felt the same. But I was stupid.” He chuckles bitterly. “How was I ever going to know how you feel if I didn’t let you see me as anything other than a best friend? When I haven't even tried to confess?”

His hands fidget by his sides, “I thought... keeping things the way they were was safer. But in doing that, I probably made it harder for both of us.”

Jungkook glances away for a second, then looks back, eyes filled with uncertainty. “Even if you don’t feel the same, I’ll still be your best friend. I promise. I just... I couldn’t carry this any longer without you knowing.”

You lower your head, staring at the floor as your heart races uncontrollably, thudding against your chest.

“___?” Jungkook’s voice is soft, laced with concern. You can feel his gaze locked on you, as if he’s scared that he’s made a mistake by confessing.

He shifts closer, hesitating before gently calling your name again.

You want to speak, to tell him how you feel, but the words are tangled in your throat.

He panics.

“I swear I’ll always be here for you, as your best friend. That won’t change. You mean too much to me to lose you over this.”

He falls quiet, watching you closely, his heart practically in his throat.

Jungkook’s fingers brush lightly against your hand, a silent reassurance. He sighs softly. “___, It’s okay,” he whispers, his voice soothing. “You don’t have to say anything right now.”

But you do.

You have to.

You slowly lift your head, meeting his gaze with tear-filled eyes. The moment Jungkook sees them, his expression shifts from confusion to pure concern.

“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” he whispers, gently cupping your face

You try to speak, but the overwhelming emotions hit you all at once. A sob escapes your lips, and before you can stop yourself, you’re crying.

“Oh, bb,” he murmurs, his voice full of warmth and comfort. Without hesitation, he pulls you into his arms, holding you close like you’re the most precious thing in the world.

His hand rubs soothing circles on your back as you bury your face into his chest, the familiar scent of him wrapping around you like a safety net. “Did I upset you? I’m so sorry,” he whispers

You shake your head against his chest, trying to tell him it’s not his fault, but the words get lost in your sobs.

“I didn’t mean to make you cry, I swear,” he continues, his voice breaking slightly. He rests his chin on top of your head, cradling you protectively. “I hate seeing you like this.”

His presence is comforting; his arms, his words, and everything about him. And for a moment, it’s just the two of you, holding on to each other, as if the world outside doesn’t exist.

Just like that day.

“You… you really like me?” you ask, still holding him, your voice breaking with sobs.

He nods, brushing a thumb gently over your cheek. “I love you, bb. You know that.”

“I love you too, Kook. You know that,” you say, sniffling softly.

You pull back slightly, looking at him in disbelief. “I can’t believe this,” you whisper, shaking your head. “All this time...”

Jungkook lowers his head, guilt flickering in his eyes. “I’m sorr—”

“All this time, I was worried that you would never like me back!” you exclaim, your words tumbling out in a rush, like the relief has finally set in.

He freezes, his eyes wide with shock.

You can see the surprise etched across his face like he’s struggling to process what you just said. His heart races in his chest, pounding so hard it’s almost deafening.

“You… you were worried I wouldn’t like you back?” Jungkook asks, his voice barely above a whisper, like he can’t believe what he just heard.

You nod, wiping your tear-streaked face with your sleeve. “Yeah. I thought I was the only one feeling this way. I was.. scared.” you admit.

Jungkook’s eyes are teary like yours and a disbelieving laugh escapes him, almost in relief. “You were scared, too?”

“All this time,” you mutter, shaking your head at how ridiculous it all seems now. “I kept telling myself not to ruin our friendship. I thought I’d lose you if I said anything.”

Jungkook tilts your chin gently, making you look at him. “You could never lose me,” he says with conviction. “You’re my best friend, my favorite person... and now I know you’re everything I’ve ever wanted.”

“I feel so stupid for waiting this long,” you whisper, sniffling.

Jungkook smiles, brushing a stray tear off your cheek. “Me too,” he admits.

“Why are you crying?” you ask, caught between sobs and laughter.

Jungkook lets out a shaky laugh, his own tears slipping down his face. “I’m just... I’m so in love with you.”

Your heart jumps.

You both laugh through the tears, the overwhelming emotions too much to contain. It feels surreal, like you’ve both been holding onto this moment for so long that it’s finally bursting free.

“I can’t believe this,” you whisper, wiping your face with the back of your hand.

Jungkook leans his forehead against yours, his hands cupping your face again. “Me neither. But I don’t want to go another day without telling you how much you mean to me.”

You close your eyes for a second, breathing him in. “Me neither,” you whisper back.

It’s messy, emotional, and perfect in its own way.

“Wait.”

a/n: hol' up- ✋🏻

[strangersteddierthings]

What's Eight Plus Seven?

Part One🦇Part Two🦇Part Three🦇Part Four🦇Part Five

Pizza order successfully placed, Steve dials Robin's number next. He doesn't need to talk long, just... hear her voice. Maybe get some verbal support.

"Buckley residence."

"Thank God it's you," Steve sighs in relief to hear Robin's voice on the other end. There was a little bit of dread that her mom might have answered and then he'd be stuck on the phone while she tried to chat with him.

"Whoa. Was hosting the nerdfest that bad?" Robin asks, laughter in her voice.

"Uhh," Steve starts, because he's eloquent like that.

"Oh no. Was is that bad? What happened?"

He feels a flood of warmth for Robin's immediate concern. "No, no, nerdfest was fine. I, uhh, mostly I'm calling because Eddie and I are gonna, like, hang out and talk and I just- I dunno. Wanted to hear your voice, first."

"Oh. Really? Well. Here's my voice. This is you hearing it."

He laughs at that. "Thanks. It's just, I think it's gonna be, like, a bathroom floor kind of conversation, except in my living room on a couch."

"Oh! I can be there in ten if you need me."

"Nah. This is just- me needing to hear your voice, and also a warning that I might have to crawl through your window and fall apart on your bed later. Just don't know how this is going to go."

"I'm here if you need me. Are you going to talk about Freshman First Day?"

"We, uhh, already did. Mostly. There's been apologies and now we're gonna talk. Get to know each other. Play 20 questions, I guess."

Robin laughs at that. "Alright. Ask him if he's ever going to get me the sandwich he owes me from back in November."

"What?"

"You know, his whole cafeteria speech thing? Stepped right on my ham and cheese. It did make him slip and almost brain himself, and he did apologize. Told me he owed me a new sandwich. I never got it. Ask for me."

"We'll see. Okay, I'm going to go but, thank you. Love you."

"Love you, too. Window will be ajar."

Steve hangs up, then opens the fridge. He debates grabbing them beers but opts for soda. Back in the living room Steve finds Eddie sitting like a normal person on the couch, one leg bouncing relentlessly. Even with his superficial knowledge of Eddie, he can tell he's nervous. Not nervous Eddie would be perched on the back of his couch, ruining the cushions with whatever junk is on the bottom of his shoes. Probably.

"Soda?" Steve offers, plopping himself on the other end of the couch, hand outstretched for Eddie to take the beverage.

"Thanks." The bouncing of Eddie's leg pauses for a moment while he's opening and chugging half the can in one swift motion, then the bouncing starts again.

"Hey, man, relax. You didn't seem nearly as nervous when you were trying to sneakily hang out earlier."

Eddie lets out a big sigh. "Yeah, well, I didn't know you hated me then."

"I don't hate you."

"Oh, shit, no. Not what- I meant, like, past tense. Hated as in, used to hate. Not present tense."

"Ah. Well, I don't think I 'hated as in used to hate' past, like, three months into my freshman year. This is going to be the most self-absorbed shit ever, but, like, once I became popular, I couldn't be bothered to hate you. Didn't have the time to put towards that."

"Oh, of that I've no doubt. That was absolutely the read everyone who tried to interact with you got."

Steve ducks his head to hide his own embarrassment by fiddling with the can in his hands. "I thought you wanted to do, like, 20 questions or something."

"Oh. Serious? You'll do it?"

"Yeah."

"Right then. What even are the rules for 20 questions? Is it 20 questions each, or in total asked?"

"I dunno, man. I don't think people actually keep track. I think we just ask questions until we're done with talking. I guess the rules are don't lie, and if you don't want to answer a question, then don't. Pass on it, or whatever."

Eddie nods but he's still nervous, leg still bouncing. A look on his face so close to fear it makes Steve ache a little. He knows too well what far looks like on Eddie, experienced a week's worth of it.

Steve can start. Ease them into this. "Do you got a favorite color?"

Eddie shifts then. Turns sideways on the couch to lean against the armrest and face him. "Wait. One more rule. No mocking answers. You may laugh once at an answer."

"If you are about to tell me it's hot pink, I cannot follow that rule."

"It's not hot pink. Jesus. It's, uhh, brown, actually," Eddie says, rolling his can between his hands. "It used to be red but. I dunno. When I think of red, now, I think of the sky in the upside down and how that was almost the last thing I ever saw. I think of blood, and bleeding out."

And here he thought he was easing them into this with the most basic of questions. Eddie's already being vulnerable. "Follow up question, if you'll allow it. Why brown?"

"What's wrong with brown?"

"Nothing. Just thought you'd pick black or something," Steve gestures to all of Eddie.

At that, Eddie looks down at his mostly black outfit, the only part of it with any color is the DIO album art on his shirt, then back up. "Fair point. I guess brown just makes me think of home. The wooden porch, the paneling, brown dirt road that leads to the trailer. It's also, like, a good eye color. Exhibit A," He waves his hand in front of his face, batting his eyes exaggeratedly. It pulls a laugh from Steve.

"I can't argue that," Steve waves towards his face, where his own eyes have been described by many a girl as ranging from hazel to honey, but Steve just thinks of them as brown. "Your turn, man."

"You, tragically, had never heard of Ozzy before we met. What's your music of choice, and why is it the Top 40?"

"Like everybody didn't hear you singing along to I Wanna Dance With Somebody last week when it came on the radio at the Byers' Barbecue-"

"Whitney is a national treasure and I will not be slandered for knowing the words to any of her songs."

"Yeah, yeah. I guess it was just the Top 40, but really I don't have a preference. I just let other people pick the music. And, uhh, with the multiple concussions I don't listen to as much music as I used to. The migraines are brutal. It's never the music that brings on the migraine but like, it never helps, y'know?"

Eddie is nodding. "I do know. Like when you get sick and vomit, you avoid the last thing you ate, even when it turns out to be the flu and not food poisoning. Like, you know it wasn't the mango milkshake that made you throw up, but you avoid the mango flavor anyway."

There's definitely a full story in that somewhere. Maybe Steve will ask about it later. "Kinda? I don't avoid music but I don't think I've put a record or cassette in the player in months. Anyway, my turn. How'd you learn to play the guitar?"

"Wayne. He started teaching me before I live with him. Just a few chords when we'd visit every so often when I was little. Really got to learn after he took me in. I was eleven, if memory serves."

"Am I allowed to ask about your parents?" Steve interrupts.

"Yeah. Speaking of parents," Eddie's nervous again, bouncing his leg.

"It's your turn. Ask."

"I know the high school reputation. Big house, no parents. I might have even snuck over a few times to sale here when I knew a party was happening. Rich kids will pay whatever price you name, y'know? So, guess the actual question is, what's the deal there, with your parents?"

Steve would laugh except he has no memory of ever seeing Eddie at his house prior to all the fuckery that's gone down. He was too in his own head to bother with other people back then. And the real kicker? He probably bought from Eddie, at his own house, with his supposed grudge and all. God, he was such a dick. "Yeah. Lots of business trips, for them. The used to ship me off to spend a month with my grandparents when I was little, so they could take those trips. Guess once I was old enough to watch after myself, those trips started to happen whenever, instead of just over summer."

"What, they left you here alone as a kid? Even during the school year?"

Eddie sounds so scandalized it'd be funny if it wasn't so sad. Steve says, "I wouldn't say kid. I was fourteen, so, like, a teenager. But, yeah, gone a lot. More and more with each passing year. I mean, they've been back, but like, for a day or two. Mom switching out what jewelry she wanted and dad bit by bit emptying his office." He pauses with a frown, remembering now the last time he did see his parents face to face. "It was about halfway through senior year. The last time they were here. They didn't even come to my graduation."

Eddie sucks in a breath and Steve can visibly see him hold back some choice words.

"Anyway, long sob story short, I'm still just a rich kid with absent parents. They don't charge me rent or anything, but I pay to keep the lights on."

"That just adds so many more questions to my list."

"Well, it's my turn now, so. What got you into Dungeons and Dragons?"

Eddie looks surprised, and then guilty. "I've always liked fantasy. And, uhh, my Freshman First Day, the DnD booth was set up in the cafeteria, an okayish looking dragon drawn on the poster taped to the booth's edge. And, uh, I approached..."

"No one told you to fuck off?"

"I didn't tell you to fuck off."

"Might've hurt less if you had," Steve hadn't even meant that to be insulting, or insinuating, but it doesn't land. He'd been aiming for teasing and missed the mark, given the way Eddie jerks back, like he's trying to put more distance between them. "Oh, shit, Eddie, I didn't mean- I was-"

The doorbell rings out and both jump, turning to the front door like it might bite them. The bell chimes again, and it's then Steve remembers he ordered pizza. Wordlessly Steve gets up and deals with that. Pays for the pizza and gives a tip, stops in the kitchen long enough to grab some napkins, then folds himself back onto the couch, placing the pizza box on the cushions between them.

The time away from the couch, less than three minutes in total, Steve thinks, was enough to calm Eddie again, since he starts the teasing, "greasy pizza box directly onto the cushions! That'll never come out you know."

Steve shrugs and grins, flipping the box open to grab a pizza slice. "That's a problem for Future Steve."

Eddie grabs his own slice, and they just eat their first slices in silence before Steve breaks that, "I really wasn't trying to- earlier, I was trying to joke. About Freshman First Day. Not, uh, not like, pick a fight. So, if you still want to talk, I think it's your turn to ask a question. Any question. A big question."

"Alright. A big one. Who is Christopher?"

"Okay. Uh, just, give me a moment. I'll answer and I'm gonna be real honest right now with you, so just let me get through this, ok?"

Eddie nods, reaching for a second slice of pizza.

Steve gathers his thoughts, and speaks. "Christopher was my cousin. His family lives in Washington, so I don't see them much. You know that 'shipped off to the grandparents' thing I told you about earlier? Christopher, and his younger siblings, Amber and Robert, also came out to visit.

"I think my grandparents loved to have us all there. My cousins were there for family time, and I was there to just... not be in my parent's way, I think, but the reason why doesn't matter. The important bit. Christopher was two years older than me, and I thought he was the coolest person in the world. I wanted to be just like him. That last summer we spent together, he told me all about the game of Dungeons and Dragons he'd played with his club at school.

"It made me want to play. I was a kid who loved fantasy, too. I had to pretend to leave that behind when I got into middle school; too afraid of disappointing my dad for still liking make believe. I didn't know at the time that making him proud was just something I'd never achieve.

"Anyway, Christopher introduced me to the game, told me the entire campaign they'd run at his school, and then sent me those books. He's the reason I was at the booth that day. If Christopher could play sports and be a nerd, maybe I could, too? But, uh, that didn't go how I planned in my head. And, then. Then," Steve stops here, a knot in his throat but his eyes dry. It's not that he doesn't still mourn the loss of Christopher, it's just that the tears have dried up long ago. "Christopher committed suicide, that year. Halfway through the school year. I think... I think even if I had joined your club, if you had let me take that flier, I would have dropped out after the funeral. I'd wanted to join so bad so that Christopher would be proud of me."

The room has lost focus, now. Steve is staring forward but he doesn't really see Eddie anymore. It's like he's fallen into his thoughts and nothing else exists anymore. "It's a bit fucked up, but being older than me, I think I looked for approval in him that I didn't find in my dad, or maybe I wanted to be him because his parents were so proud of everything he did and I wanted that. Approval. I- it's- I think I used to confuse the two. Approval and love. Maybe I still do? I dunno.

"I guess I just wrapped all that up, the need for approval, Christopher's suicide, my love for fantasy, and shoved it in the same bottle deep down that I kept my anger at you in," Steve blinks himself back into the present. Takes in Eddie's face, a mix of sad and fond, like he wants to wrap Steve in a hug. Steve would probably let him. "That wasn't fair to you. I'm sorry."

Eddie shakes his head no. "You don't have to apologize to me, Stevie. I get it. You wore your jockness that same way I wear The Freak. Like armor. You weren't wrong, earlier, when you said we were dumb kids who learned to lash out and hurt first, so we couldn't be hurt. I was fucking, no, I am still like that. I mean, I just lashed back out at you when all you did was point out how I'd acted to you."

"Yeah, well, life gives everyone a shit hand sometimes. I used to capitalize on that. Kick people when they were down. It's- it's humbling and, like, awful, to unpack that. I know I'm still working on it, but I didn't have to do it alone. Robin and Dustin have been there for me. Great. They call me on my bullshit and it's easier to take then, hearing it from people I know who care about me."

"Guess I better ask find someone to call me out then."

"Haven't you already?" Steve asks, gesturing to himself.

Eddie barks a laugh. "I- yeah, I guess. You sayin' you care, Harrington?"

"Of course I do, man. We wouldn't be doing this -talking about deep shit and getting pizza grease all over my couch- if I didn't."

He watches Eddie turn red, and hide behind his hair. "Could just be doing it for the kids."

"I could. Guess you'll have to trust I'm not. That I also want a do over."

Eddie shoots him a big smile, dimples on full display, and Steve's happy to let go of his grudge if it means Eddie will smile at him like that more.

-

((Looks like there's going to be one more part. Thought this would be the last one but the boys wouldn't cooperate so next part.))

[mintmatcha]

mint im gonna cry my stomach dropped when reader told aizawa he could walk i feel sick I FEEL SICKKKKK it's like every single day i live to suffer at your hands 🥲🥲 im gonna sob

SHE DOESN"T KNOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW

Anyway here's the little drabble I promised yesterday and forgot about lol:

Inevitable bonus (between chapter 6 and 7)

-----

It's not often that Aizawa swallows his pride and calls Hizashi to pick him up, so Hizashi doesn't push. He doesn't even say anything until they're halfway to Aizawa's home, parked in work day traffic. The blonde turns down the radio until it's a whisper.

"Bad day?"

Aizawa grunts. His forehead is pressed into the cool glass of the passenger side window. His chair is slid all the way back, legs fully extended. He digs his thumb into the muscle of his thigh, wincing at the pressure.

"Leg bothering you?"

He knocks his forehead against the glass. "Obviously."

"Sorry, sorry." Hizashi clears his throat. "It is not fitting correctly or something? We can stop and get one of those pads-"

Aizawa interrupts. "It's not the plastic's fault, it's the fucking muscle it's attached to."

Ah. Hizashi gives a sympathetic wince. He waits for a long while, until the energy in the car simmers down a little more.

"You should take some time off and see your doc-- just to check, you know?"

"I can't take a week off right now, we're about to launch and these interns are morons. Only Ururaka can do anything right, and fucking Kaminari is a burden--" Aizawa shifts and sighs, rubbing his face in his palms. "Tensei'll be here for the convention in a couple weeks, so I'll just tough it out until then. It'll be fine."

"Are you-?"

"I said it's fine."

A car honks somewhere in the sea of vehicles.

"Anything else bothering you?" Hizashi asks it as softly as he can. "You're prickly, but you're not usually this prickly."

Aizawa runs his tongue over his teeth in thought, thinking about his answer. His voice is still bitter when he answers: "Bad date."

"Oh! Oh, shit, I didn't realize you were even--" Hizashi has to recover from the shock before continuing. "Good for you for getting out there. I mean it, you're such a catch. This is great for you."

"Doesn't feel great."

"Yeah, I know, but it'll inevitably work out though, when you meet the right person. I promise. Look at me and 'Muri! I'm a freak and I found someone."

Aizawa gives him the side eye. "You find multiple someone's a week."

"Okay, whoa, sex is different than love. I could get you laid tonight if that's what you wanted."

Aizawa sucks air in through his nose, then slowly sighs. His hand is still on his face, dragging it down almost comically.

"It's not."

Hizashi knew that. He just hums in approval, fingers tapping against the leather steering wheel. "Does this mean you're giving up on...?"

"That was never a thing." Aizawa tumbles over himself as he speaks.

Hizashi gives him a half smile, one that's more sad than convinced. "Got it."

[joels-shitty-puns]

The Snacks of Us

Pairing: No-Outbreak!Joel Miller x Reader

Summary: Texas-native Joel finds out you've never been to a Buc-ee's and needs to fix it immediately. That's it.

Warnings: Just fluff! Kisses. Pet names.

Other stuff: Reader is addressed as her, but most other descriptions are avoided. Joel is taller than the reader. Can be read as plus-sized, but not mentioned.

Word count: 1.1K

I went to Buc-ee's today and my imagination ran wild. Do with this what you will lol

__________

"Whaddya mean y'ain't never been to a Buc-ee's?" Joel asked, incredulously.

"Joel, I'm not from Texas. How the hell would I know what Buc-ee's is?" You replied.

"Y'don't even know what it is!? That's it. Grab your purse, darlin'. We're gettin' you to a Buc-ee's." 

"Have you noticed your accent slips out more when you're all worked up about Texas things, Joel? It's cute."

"No, I haven't. Now, let's go. You're gonna love it. It's the biggest gas station y'ever seen." His eyes grew wide and he demonstrated the vastness of Buc-ee's with his arms.

"Wait… it's a GAS STATION? You're taking me to a gas station for our date?" You raised your brow at your boyfriend.

"Just trust me, darlin'. You'll love it." He pulled you by your hips and placed a kiss on your reluctant mouth.

You sighed. "Hmm… fine. But can we at least get lunch while we're out?" You batted your eyelashes.

"Course. What do you think we're doin' at Buc-ee's?" He winked.

"Joel!" You gasped. "I am NOT eating some shriveled up gas station hot dog that's been sitting out all day." Your mouth gaped open and you crossed your arms.

"Just trust me!" He grabbed you by your waist, hoisting you over his shoulder.

"Joel!!!" You squealed, giggling and smacking his back. "Put me down! You're gonna hurt your back! I'm too heavy."

"Please, sugar. You weigh less'n my work equipment," he smacked you on the butt.

You scoffed, "yeah right."

Joel set you in the passenger seat of his truck. "Well, y'are. At least until we fill y'up with some beaver nuggets," he winked, giving your belly an affectionate pat and closing the door.

"Beaver nuggets???? Joel! What is that?" You laughed as he rounded the truck toward the driver's side.

_____

Joel pulled the truck into the Buc-ee's parking lot. 

"This. Is.. a gas station?!" You stared, mentally counting the amount of gas pumps and eyeing the giant building with a large beaver on the wall.

"Told'ya to keep an open mind! Let's go," he hopped out of the truck.

The two of you walked in and your mind was blown. They had everything, all with a cute little beaver on the label.

Buc-ee's chips. Candy. Cookies. Fudge. Sandwiches. Coffee. Every soda imaginable. Beaver nuggets, which Joel grabbed two bags of.

He pushed a cart as you ran around like a kid at Christmas. "Babe! Look at this cute little Buc-ee plushie!"

"I know, darlin'. I told'ya you'd like this store." He smiled affectionately at you. You tossed the stuffed beaver into the cart.

"Whoa, whoa, Sugar. Our house can't hold many more stuffed animals, it's practically oozing fluff as we speak."

"Oh shush, Joel. I need him," you said while throwing two sets of matching Buc-ee pajamas in the cart.

"Two?" He raised an eyebrow, looking at the tags.

"One for you. One for me," you kissed his cheek, skipping merrily toward the hoodies.

Joel shook his head, too lovesick to object to the matching flannel pajamas covered in cartoon beavers.

An older gentleman walked past Joel and gave a look from Joel with the cart, to you holding up several hoodies and comparing. "First time?" The old man laughed.

"Unfortunately," Joel rolled his eyes, laughing. "I underestimated her shopping ability when I decided to take her here."

"Been there," the old man pointed to an older lady, presumably his wife. "I'm Arthur." He shook hands with Joel. "My wife Marlene and I have been comin' here for years and she's the same way." He looked at her lovingly. "You two remind me a lot of us when we were younger. You make a lovely couple."

Joel smiled and looked over at you, where the older woman, Marlene, had walked up and began talking to you. Your smile lit up, and the old lady clapped her hands together once, excitedly helping you decide between two sweatshirts. Your eyes found Joel and you both shared a smile. 

Joel looked back at the old man and grinned. "Thank you, sir. She's definitely a keeper." The old man patted Joel on the shoulder, leaving to meet up with his wife and kissing her on the cheek as they walked away.

You scampered over to Joel, holding up both hoodies. "I couldn't decide, so Marlene suggested I get both," you giggled.

Joel rolled his eyes, unable to stop the smile on his face. "Alright, throw 'em in the cart. But we better get outta here before I have to take out a loan."

"Thank you for taking me here, baby. I had a lot of fun, and I'm sorry I gave you a hard time earlier," you pulled his collar, lowering his face so you could kiss him on the lips.

"Anytime, sugar. I'll never get tired of seeing that smile." He kissed you back, rubbing his thumb across your cheek.

"Now, whaddya say we go grab a couple sandwiches and sodas, then head back and watch movies in these matching pajamas the rest of the day," Joel suggested.

You nodded excitedly, thrilled with your boyfriend's willingness to participate in your shenanigans. "YES!"

Joel headed towards the checkout counter, struggling to reel you in from looking at more merch. He already took out a large deposit for the ring hidden in his dresser drawer, and this was easily going to cost at least a hundred more.

The two of you walked to the truck, him smacking you on the butt as you climbed in the passenger seat while he held the door open. Shaking his head, he thinks back to the older couple. How Arthur said you reminded him of them in their younger days. Sitting in the driver's seat, he smiled at you, taking in your features.

"What?" You asked, giggling and running your hand through the curls by his ear. 

"Nothin' darlin'. Just thinking about us and how much I love you," he smiled.

"I love you too, Joel" you pressed a kiss to his lips, running your hand down to his neck and pulling him in deeper.

"Thank you again for today," you grinned, pulling away.

"Anytime, Sugar. There'll be plenty more where that came from," he replied, stealing a quick glance at your empty ring finger. Maybe tonight will be the night, he thought.

"Think we'll ever be like Arthur and Marlene?" You asked him, taking a slight risk at the question of your future while interlacing your fingers with his right hand.

He looked over at you, kissing your knuckles. "I hope so, Sunshine." He kissed your ring finger. "I hope so."

___________

So anyway, yeah I might have a problem lol. But I hope you liked this. Let me know what you think ❤️ thanks for reading.

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

I love Yai so much.

He's so protective & loyal. I really want to know who he was in the past life, because they implied all the friends are connected! Has he always been Tharn's loyal friend?

Also Phaya hitting Tharn was such a dick move. But it does seem like his anger might be beyond normal - I forget who theorized that Chalothon might have had some sort of supernatural effect on him? But it seems very plausible. It's an effective way to keep them apart.

Damn, I just love the way they stage shots in this show.

Ha, I knew it! They never show someone that much in the background unless it's for setup.

Also I love that when Tharn said his name, Phaya popped his head around to look at him all "wtf?".

Ok, I know he's a killer, but also - hot damn.

Gotta say, as much as I don't love cops as protagonists these days, I like that the show is calling out that cops can easily be criminals, and the justice system is fucked.

Whoa...possession?

Ok, so now I'm wondering if he was killing because something out there fed his anger to the extreme...kinda like what happened to Phaya, but over a longer time.

Omg! The look of horror! This is sooooo Chalothon y'all!!!

The feeeeeels.

I am weak.

Ugh. This guy is annoying me.

Keep questioning the system boys!

So the cop/hero stuff is blech, but I do find the parallel they're setting up here interesting.

Tharn, baby? Did you forget about all the people saying you've done wrong in your past life?

Lol, not Phaya prepping to make a move!

Either a whole lot of lights appeared out of nowhere or this is another fantasy sequence.

GODDAMMIT.

Look, I do appreciate we're getting some nice spicy moments to tide us over until they hook up in real life, but also - we need some real life smooches!!!

Ha, Tharn is a realist. I always think the same thing with wound-blowing scenes!

Gonna have to bring your fantasies to life some other way Phaya!

Oh damn!

Love what Heng is doing with his jaw, it's so suggestive of a snake about to unhinge.

Check the bingo card, obligatory sponge bath!

Lol, Phaya's "is this really happening or is this another horny daydream?" face.

Sibling relationships are so relatable, no matter what culture you're from.

OH DAMN!!

I still have no idea what's happening here, but I love it all the same.

[satureja13]

Summer Solstice - Part 2 It starts -> here

After Jack and Sai returned from their walk, they all gathered around the fire and Jack, Jeb and Ji Ho played a few songs. No Siren's Songs this time to influence the feelings of his friends so they are able spend time together - despite their quarrels.

Jeb sang 'Fast Car' (for Saiwa obviously)

'So, I remember when we were driving, driving in your car Speed so fast, I felt like I was drunk City lights lay out before us And your arm felt nice wrapped around my shoulder And I, I, I had a feeling that I belonged I, I, I had a feeling I could be someone, be someone, be someone'

Ji Ho feels they will have a great evening without the Siren's Songs and it's too dangerous anyway until they find out how to protect themselves, should the Council and Ji Ho's grandfather try something. It's better they do without them. They'll have to learn to live all together again anyway. Jack sang 'Ring of Fire' (links leads to the version from Blondie (from one of my favourite movies of all time, Roadie)) He would never admit that he sings it for Kiyoshi so we don't dive any deeper in that ö.ö

'The chase of love is sweet, when hearts like ours meet I felt for you like a child, oh my heart went wild

I fell into a burning ring of fire I went down down down the flames they went higher and it burns burns burns that ring of fire, that ring of fire, that ring of fire'

The cute birds are back again too! That's such a sweet interaction <3

And Ji Ho sang 'Livin' on a Prayer' for Vlad. They're almost there.

'We've gotta hold on to what we've got It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not We've got each other and that's a lot for love We'll give it a shot

Whoa, we're half way there Whoa oh, livin' on a prayer Take my hand, we'll make it I swear Whoa oh, livin' on a prayer Livin' on a prayer'

Aouwww

Ji Ho was right, they managed to have a nice evening together without his spells. They were grilling and telling stories and having a good time. Somehow their therapies seem to work. There'd been no great aha effects, but they already prospered a lot. (I think that's important too, not to expect too much too early from a therapy/healing. It needs time and it goes slowly. Healing and prospering needs time. But when you look back from a distance, you'll notice the little steps you've made and you'll see the difference.) And time also heals. Saiwa is relieved. He'd feared much worse because he'd been so upset about Jeb and Kiyoshi - and his own stupidity that he agreed to have a fake relationship to bring Kiyoshi fully back after he'd spent decades into that tree. Over the last months they'd been apart from each other, Saiwa not only calmed down but also came to the conclusion that it had been not really anyones fault. And each of them would do exactly the same again to help each other. There are no excuses to be made and there's no real reason to be angry or jealous. But he still is. He's jealous that Jeb and Kiyoshi live together now even tough he rejected to move in with Jeb when he asked him. And angry at the universe that they have to go through all these crazy madnesses all the time! And what Saiwa just still doesn't know: Is it possible to have a relationship under these circumstances? Will he ever be able to be the leader of the Boys and a worthy partner for Jeb? How will they deal with it when such things happen again? Even though they live in solitude in the Otherworld now, there is still so much going on. Jack even died during his Therapy Game! One day, they will have to return to the Muggle World and then they'll have the Council at their heels again...

Here, Kumo told Bunny the story how Kiyoshi became a diety and how Kiri, Little Goat and him watched over Kiyoshi all the decades he'd spend in the tree. Bunny listened with big eyes Ö.Ö Little Goat was already sleeping, he'd heard this story a million times before ^^'

They soon all got tired and went to their tents. Ji Ho and Vlad first, since teleporting the TukTuk around is draining them. But not as much as last time when they had to port two times to Tartosa and back plus Noxee and Greg to Tomarang and back home to Moonwood Mill.

It's so cute with all the wildlife around, even the birds stayed after their songs ended 🐦

Early next morning, Jeb dragged Vlad and Kiyoshi out to go for a run. Jeb goes jogging almost every morning and he even kept on doing this all the months while Ji Ho, Saiwa and Jack left to live at the Beach House after Saiwa's breakdown. Despite his heartache. It helped him to stay sane. Just running without thinking and worrying too much.

The little ones were already awake too and chatting with the Bunnies. Henford gossip holds a lot of new ideas and inspiration for their stories and the game! ^^'

True story! (I found out about the following last November when Lavina asked Francine's (Jeb's grandmother's) boyfriend out for a date 'casual friend time' and never posted it lol) Who said life in the countryside is boring?

Such a wonderful morning!

Before they return back to the campsite, they took a short break. Henford is just so beautiful. Jeb to Vlad: "You noticed too that Kiyoshi feels so much better since Jack is back, did you?" Vlad sighed. Yes, he noticed it. Kiyoshi is still far from his old self and doesn't talk much because he's absent and far away in his divine/demonic/whatever spheres his mind roams, but there is a significant improvement. There is a deeper connection between Jack and Kiyoshi, even though Jack declines it - and never felt it. But what are they supposed to do? Jack and Kiyoshi tried to be together but it just didn't work out and Jack almost died (twice) because he worked himself up during their (secret) relationship. They'd all promised to not keep any secrets from each other anymore. So they'll have to talk to Saiwa about this. Which will make him angry again because he's worried about Jack and he still hasn't fully recovered from his own breakdown... Jeb and Vlad sighed from the depths of their souls.

to be continued...

The Therapy Game Master Post with the sessions and places so far is -> here

From the Beginning  ~  Underwater Love ~  Latest Current Chapter: 'Who killed Jack?' from the beginning ▶️ here Last Chapter: 🕹️ 'The One' from the beginning ▶️ here 📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 17-22 ~ 23-28

[blue-thief]

oh the wonders of realizing due dates are actually farther than i expected

@marcsnuffy this is all basically just based off how this guy is made up of twelve billion contradictions esp when we're considering gender expression.

i've gone over this before, but he's the type of guy who would read dazai, dostoevsky, kafka, etc in a male manipulator kind of way. this type of guy also goes in hand with the type of guy who watches fight club, american psycho, etc with zero self awareness (i'm not much of a film nerd so i can't really speak about his taste in films specifically).

his dad probably had a collection of old films he worked on, and kaiser watched them all on some old cd or cassette player in hopes of finding some with his mom. even though his mom showed up in more dramatic films rather than tougher serious ones, these ones hold a special place in his heart. he's not in denial about this, but he never brings it up to anyone. around the time he was a tween, he snuck into a movie theatre to watch one of his mom's films.

i believe it was mentioned that his parents started off in theater, and once kaiser became rich enough, he took time to see live productions at least once a month. his goal is to catch up on shakespeare since he never got a chance to learn about him at school (i had to check r/askeurope to see if shakespeare is taught there 😭😭).

as much as it's funny to imagine hamilton fan kaiser, i don't think he'd be drawn to musicals that much. he doesn't mind them, but they aren't usually on his radar. he's considered going to the opera though. for the sake of affirming to himself that he's now financially stable.

he canonically reads psychology textbooks, and i think he has read jordan peterson's books. (SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP BECAUSE I HAVE PROBABLY WALKED ON THE SAME FLOOR AS JORDAN PETERSON ON MULTIPLE OCCASIONS GET ME OUT OF HEERREEEEEE) i don't think he'd care or agree with jordan peterson but he definitely has read him, maybe even bought some of his works shudders he also read the dictator's handbook + the art of war and has used this in ways that are disastrous for everyone involved

beyond the dazai, dostoevsky, kafka, etc vibe, i don't think there's much fiction he'd be drawn to. at some point, he decided to check out f. scott key fitzgerald, saw jay gatsby, and went "he's just like me fr" (again, zero self awareness)

as for music, i think he would listen to three days grace in particular (i have listened to exactly ONE three days grace song and that is "i am machine" and all i could think was "he would listen to this /neg" then added it to my own liked songs playlist). he might have stumbled across panic! at the disco and he probably vibed pretty well with a fever you can't sweat out. he would not care for any other panic! at the disco album. he also wouldn't care for ryden so he wouldn't read throam. but i need this guy to somehow read throam because throam!ryan ross is literally him.

he probably heard primadonna girl by marina but didn't care at first. it wasn't until he accidentally stumbled across oh no that he was like "i need to listen to the rest of this". he only ended up caring for the family jewels and electra heart, and electra heart is more feminine than most things he would allow himself to listen to, but this is just his way of going "whoa look i'm a feminist i like women i'm listening to a woman and sings about woman stuff". relates to the persona of electra heart once again because AGAIN. THIS GUY HAS ZERO SELF AWARENESS 😭😭 HE NEVER REALIZES THE ART HE CONNECTS TO IS TELLING HIM THAT HE SHOULD NOT BE THE WAY THAT HE IS 😭😭😭

but yeah. electra heart is his limit to willingly admitting to feminine art but this guy is subconsciously drawn to taylor swift but more like in the sense that he's fascinated with her presence in the cultural zeitgeist. which is a strange form of being a swiftie, but his relationship with famous women is strange considering his relationship with his mother. if his mother got big enough that she worked with americans on american projects, there's a chance that she would talk about/be publicly acquainted with a lot of young famous women for the sake of white feminism yk. he consumes their art just through cultural osmosis but his understanding of their personal drama and stuff is weirdly detailed

also these are all totally definitely absolutely not examples of me projecting 😁😁 because i AM self aware and i am better than michael kaiser in every way possible 😁😁😁

[wearelondonhq]

AGATHA ALL ALONG + WANDAVISION MEME SET

Happy Meme Day!!! If you want to take part all you have to do is reblog this post. Remember if you reblog to send them out to EVERYONE who also does. Lasts from today up until the next wednesday (the 13th of november)!

“what were you looking for in my house?”

“the respect of your peers and a fulfilling home life. but you were fresh out of both.”

"you're so much like your mother."

"the world isn’t kind to little girls who don’t know their place."

"we are an unusual couple, you know?"

"this world you made will always be broken."

"this is your only warning. stay out of my home."

"we are not in control here."

"everything is meaningless without you."

"you can fix anything, mama."

"we've said goodbye before. it stands to reason that we will say hello again."

"i only remember feeling completely alone. empty. just… endless nothingness."

"_, welcome home."

"i read somewhere that it’s bad luck to say goodbye in the dark."

"i’m not a monster. i’m a mother."

"i just feel you."

"i just wanted to see you clearly."

"this is chaos magic, _"

"i’m tired of hiding."

"you have no idea what you’ve unleashed."

"you didn’t think you were the only magical girl in town, did you?"

"i can’t control this pain anymore, and i don’t think i want to."

"this is our home now. i want us to fit in."

"so long, darling."

"we’re not going anywhere."

"this is our home, then let’s fight for it."

"you don’t get to make that choice for me."

"you’re not my neighbor, and you’re definitely not my friend."

"you asked me to stay, so i’m staying."

"there are rules in life, we can’t just rush aging."

"is this really happening?"

"you’re not supposed to talk."

"thank you for choosing me to be your _."

"they’ll never know what you sacrificed for them."

"i’m beginning to think we should have stayed in bed."

"i’ve kept you safe in here. you feel at peace."

"if you stay here, you’ll die. it’ll be just like _ all over again."

"we can’t reverse death, no matter how sad it makes us."

"what is grief, if not love persevering?"

"i have what i want, and no one will ever take it from me again."

"you are my sadness, and my hope. but mostly, you’re my love."

"you can’t control me the way you do them."

"gosh, you really are a _. otherwise, none of this would be nearly as dramatic."

"honestly, I don't know how to feel. do I hate her? or do I want her phone number?"

"no one in history has had special treatment like you."

"no! i want more time! i want more time!"

"i'm thinking death by a thousand cuts."

"a long time ago, i loved someone. and I had to do something that I did not wanna do, even though it was my job. and it hurt them. she is my scar."

you can find a couple more options below the cut!

"i mean, seriously. we're an album cover waiting to happen."

"hey, you want straight answers, ask a straight lady."

"see, I feel like you've typecast me as the mouthy teen who didn't actually kill the victim but is guilty of some other b-story crime."

"you haven't been yourself the past few days. almost like you got bit by the true crime bug."

"congratulations, my love. i'm sorry I didn't have a ribbon for you to run through."

"you seem relaxed. usually at this point you're either complaining loudly or freaking out loudly."

"stop embarrassing me in front of my friends."

“witches like you are the reason people think we poison apples, steal , and eat .”

"i watch you, _. just as closely as you watch everyone else.

"are you really defending a noted serial killer, you creepy lurker?"

"i have always hated you. but I left you alone, because what you were doing is important."

"last one there is a nice person."

"i let them believe these things about me because the truth is too awful."

"sweetheart? you okay? oh my god! whoa, what’s she doing? where’s she going?"

"we'll be safe as kittens."

"the moral of the story, kids, IS always finish what you started. also, mercy is overrated.”

“may she be smart. not annoying. and also not… SUPER political.”

"i thought you were reading my palm."

“this is undignified. don’t you want me at my best?”

“are there any real witches in the house? because all i see are has-beens and could’ve-beens.”

"what can i say? i like the bad boys."

“did you know she traded her own child for the book of the damned?”

“they can take your power, _, but they can’t take your knowledge.”

“a witch is really just another name for a bad girl, right?”

“that is extremely reductive.”

"i let them believe these things about me because the truth is too awful."

“we’re alive. we made it through the first test. everyone is safe.”

“not everyone. _’s dead. "who’s _?”

“okay, so, confession. i know an egregious amount about you. i’ve been obsessed since i first read up on your _ days.”

“what a team of rejects. coward. fraud. disappointment. i’d say you should burn like the rest of them, but that would be a waste of kindling.”

“the road promises that what’s missing awaits you at its end. power is what i’m missing. sounds like it’s what you’re missing too.”

“it’s giving ‘middle-aged second chance at love’ vibes, and i’m here for it.”

[foxgirlknot]

kinktober 2024 day 22: safeword // sensory deprivation (la pluma/utage) (ao3)

It's dark.

It's been dark for a while, since Utage helped her into the strange cube of rubber, but it's just now sinking in just how dark it is.

And how little she can move.

At first it was nice, having a chance to not think, to exist without form in the darkness. But now the dark is too present and she can't take her mind off of it. She is alone and she can't move and it's dark.

She can't move and she has never been able to move it's been too long in the darkness and she'll never get out and see Ernesto or Papa again. She needs to get out and see them again see everyone again but she can't move she can't see she can't breathe.

She doesn't exist she's been in here too long and everyone has forgotten about her she can't move she can't see she can't breathe everything is dark and has always been and she's going to die in here unless something changes but nothing ever changes everything is dark and she can't move she can't see can't breathe she can't exist she can't she can't she can't can't can't can't can't until she can again as direction returns and her knees hit the floor and the darkness parts above her somewhere far and she can't move but she can as a hand descends like an angel to grab at her wrist and lift her from the darkness and it's Utage, guiding her into the light and saying something, what is she saying, it's too hard to focus when her body is new and she can move again and see again and breathe again.

"...whoa, hey, easy, you're... ... ... ... ok. I got you."

She can see, move, breathe, and Utage is a lighthouse guiding her back to reality, surprisingly soft even as her nails dig into her back, lifting her from the floor and moving for her while she comes back to herself over to the bed where she sits head between her knees as she still fights to breathe.

"Rafaela? Are you ok? Talk to me, girl."

No, yes, she shakes her head, she doesn't have words doesn't want to have words for what she experienced and rising from long ago the words come to her fingers unbidden to speak for her, opening and closing and tapping at her chin.

<<no speak, but ok>>

"Oh, shit. Ok, yeah, I got you. Here."

A bottle is held to her face, and she tries to take it but Utage is firm, tilting her head back to let her drink while she remains in control, helping while she can move see breathe, gasping as she swallows the water refreshing her senses and now she can see Utage in front of her on her knees grinning with teeth and worried eyes.

"Ok, good, you're ok. Had me scared for a moment there, you started thrashing something fierce!"

<<panic>>, she signs weakly.

"Ok, no, I get ya. Hold on a sec." Utage stands now, going to her closet and rummaging in its depths. "Some people love it, some people hate it, but I'm proud of ya for giving it a shot, and now we don't have to ever do it again, ok? Here."

A robe lands in her lap, soft and silken and neon yellow, and Utage lands next to her with a thump, already lifting her gift to slip around her shoulders. "Now we're just gonna sit here until you're recovered, ok? Don't worry about having to talk, I know I do that plenty for the both of us. Just rest. You're safe now."

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN *  assorted dialogue from the 2009 film

i rise... you fall.

hey, will you look at me please?

so much negativity... who wants to live a life filled with hate?

you picked the wrong planet.

i will tear you apart!

can you imagine that?

i've got no time to talk, i'm on a mission!

who's winning?

are you scared?

i'm not gonna hurt you.

i love you.

don't tempt me.

what is the meaning of this?

a lot of people died.

i changed sides.

i know where to find them!

stay still or you'll die!

listen to me! i want you to run!

i have issues of my own.

what do you want?

i know you're freaking out. don't freak out.

just hear me out, okay?

that's a good question.

looks like we're right in the middle of it.

oh look who came sashaying back.

do you have any idea what it's like to slowly fall apart and die?

it's not the last time i'm gonna see you.

i never did a thing worth doing until now.

they're gonna kill us all anyway!

what if we leave, and you're wrong?

i know someone who can help.

freedom is your right.

what are you doing here?

no time to explain!

just come over here and take it. don't harm them.

you'll never stop at one.

we're old friends.

did he say goodbye?

you did your job. it's over with.

i can't do that with you.

you gonna talk now?

maybe we can help each other. you know things i don't know, i know things you don't know.

hey, behave!

if they had their way, they'd destroy the whole universe.

if you hate me, i understand. i messed up. i'm sorry.

you are the person i care for most in my life, and if there is anything you need, i won't be far away.

there's a car on the porch!

i'm sorry, what were you saying?

you remember me, don't you?

well that wasn't so bad.

what are you doing here, you little freak?

i'll take you all on.

i messed that up. i'm okay.

he sacrificed himself to save me.

just stay right there, okay?

i'll do what you say, all right? just don't hurt them.

sometimes cowards do survive.

i could do this all day.

i'm not going anywhere, all right?

i'm not taking you with me.

whoa, somebody shit the bed this morning.

thank you for saving my life.

hey, i think we're in vegas!

he left me here to rust.

that went well.

i want to be normal.

when did you tell us? you didn't tell us anything!

if you make that request, we will honor it.

it's a choice. it's an intensely personal decision.

this isn't over.

i'm in the car with you. you're not alone.

oh, you have much to learn.

how is that possible?

show yourselves, or suffer my infinite wrath!

is he alive?

where is the boy?

what are you talking about?

it's time for the world to know about our presence.

i'm gonna wait outside.

look, i am slowly losing my mind, okay?

he's here. i smell him.

you're trained to shoot, not to talk.

so disappointing...

is that the best you've got?

when you go, he goes.

this isn't my war.

any last words?

look at this place! i feel smarter already!

you don't need me.

thank you for believing in me.

i am a wanted fugitive.

stop saying that!

do not tell my mother.

i don't think he's gonna hurt us.

i am where i'm supposed to be.

is that the best you can do?

you've got to have a bigger purpose than just me.

sounds to me like something's coming.

if you can't read it, we gotta find somebody who can.

i had a meltdown in the middle of my class.

will you leave peacefully?

what you are about to see is top secret.

fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing.

hey, that freaking hurt!

you won't give me a day, huh?

i tell you, this guy did not age well.

that did not sound good.

okay, so how do we stop him?

[dravidssideblog]

"Hey, have you seen this yet?"

"Huh? 'Poke-Forms'... The hell is this?"

"It's that technology that can transform people into pokemon. It just recently got approved for commercial use."

"THAT stuff!? Ew, that's weird! People are really paying to turn into animals?"

"Well yeah. Haven't you ever wanted to fly, or breathe fire?"

"No thanks, I'll stick to being an actual person."

"Alright. I'm planning on spending a couple days as a mudkip, see what it's like swimming in a body like that."

"A mudkip!? Not even something cool, like a charizard, or gyarados?"

"Evolved forms cost extra. I want to start small, just dip my toes in, you know?"

"Whatever. Have fun crawling on all fours, I guess."

"Hah, maybe I will! Anyway, gotta go, see ya."

"..."

-

"Gah, darn these stubby little- Aha! Hey, you home? You forgot to lock up- ... Uh."

"I can explain."

"Oh, so when I want to be a mudkip for a few days I'm a weird little freak, but when YOU want to be a meowscarada it's apparently different?"

"It IS different! Just let me explain!"

"Okay. Explain."

"... meowscarada is really cool."

"You're a cat."

"I'm a MAGICIAN! See, look at this! I've got powers, and I can do magic tricks and stuff! And I've got a cool mask, and a cape-"

"Those aren't real clothes, you're actually naked."

"I- So are you! And at least I'm standing on two legs! You couldn't even be bothered to be a marshtomp instead."

"Yeah, because evolutions cost extra- ... How much did you spend on this?"

"That... is none of your business."

"We're splitting rent, I think it IS my business. How much did you spend?"

"... 50 days worth."

"WHAT!?"

"I had to! Look, just getting to meowscarada needs 36 days, and then I needed to buy MORE days to actually spend time as meowscarada, and it'd be a waste to spend all that money up front for just a few days, so... I got two extra weeks worth."

"... You're a idiot."

"You did the same thing!"

"No, I bought a few days of transformation to test the waters, and I gotta say, it's a pain in the ass sometimes not having my normal human body! YOU paid for 50 DAYS with NO IDEA how it would feel! Why didn't you pick some 1st stage pokemon to try it out first?"

"I don't WANT to be a 1st stage pokemon, I want to be meowscarada! And hey, I got hands, I got two legs, and I'm almost as tall as I was before. AND check out what I can do with this flower yo-yo-OW!"

"Mhm. Right."

"Okay so I need a little practice, but this is way better than being some tiny, 4-legged beast."

"Tell that to your bank account. Anyway, I'm going to take a nice, long bath, because this tiny body makes water feel GREAT."

"Fine, I'll just be here being an awesome magician with plant powers... Okay, swing it up, then around, then across like- Gah, almost got it..."

-

"Around and around, then watch it waver and waggle, aaaaand how about some loop-de-loops!"

"Okay I know that's on an invisible string, but I still have NO idea how you're moving it like that. You're barely even moving your hands!"

"Hah! Just instinct, practice, and youtube tutorials, my adoring audience! Now let's bring it UP, oop, oh no~ Now where has my flower gone~?"

"Well, you swung it behind your back..."

"Check behind your chair~"

"You couldn't have- Oh my god!"

"HaHA! Never underestimate a master magician! Now, for my next trick, keep an eye on the flower, watch it twirl, until in 3, 2, 1- WHA! *THUD*"

"Whoa, how'd you do that!?"

"Ha ha, very funny, but no, tripping wasn't part of the performance."

"No seriously, you timed that perfectly!"

"Timed wha- ... Why are you so tall? Oh, shit, has it been two weeks already? Damn it!"

"What, is being a floragato so bad?"

"I'm 3 feet tall, you tell me."

"So... What now? Gonna head to the Poke-Forms place and turn back to a human?"

"I guess, but... *sigh*, I spent so much money on this. It'd be such a waste. Maybe I can extend it, get more meowscarada days..?"

"And, what, keep giving the company money for your whole life? And either way, you still won't get to use those... what, 30 extra days you bought?"

"36. And yeah, I guess not. A whole month's worth of days... Gah, I can't just let it go to waste! I mean, I've still got powers! And I'm still mostly humanoid. Better than being a mudkip, at least."

"Disagree on that."

"Shut up. Ah, my flower's turned into a bud. And the vine's so thick and- Oh. Oh, it's got some weight to it, some real momentum! Hey, yeah, I can work with this!"

"So I guess you'll need help reaching the top shelves for a few weeks?"

"Actually, I won't. Observe! Uh, ah, shit, FUCK!"

"... You're cleaning that up."

-

"Hey, short-stuff! Didn't expect to see you here."

"I told you I'd be out tonight."

"Yeah, but at a party? You know everyone can see how small and cute you are, right?"

"Pff, whatever. Just means they're more shocked when they see my tricks! The ladies love the yo-yo, you know~"

"Yeesh, and after you spent days holed up inside because you didn't want to be seen as a meowscarada."

"That was a month ago. I'm used to all this now! Besides, no way I'm staying inside when the sun feels so nice on my fur."

"I keep forgetting you have fur now. Does that like, change how you shower, or..?"

"Oh yeah, I got a whole routine figured out for it."

"Wow, you're really settling into this. I don't think I could stand being a pokemon for more than a week, much less a month."

"It's more than worth it to have these floragato powers. Seriously, I'm like spiderman with this yo-yo!"

"You're about as tall as a spider, too."

"Just makes it easier to move around. And hey, everyone wants to lose weight, right? I've lost nearly 150 pounds!"

"You sure make the most of it, jumping on counters and climbing over the couch. It's like I actually have a pet cat."

"Come on, this cat's way too cool to be your pet."

"You won't be cool for much longer. How many floragato days do you have left now?"

"Oh. Shoot, I dunno. Probably only like 2 or 3..."

"Yeah, that sounds right. Better make the most of it then."

"Good point, absolutely. Hey everyone! Check this shit out!"

-

"Um, hey, so uh..."

"Huh? Oh! Finally out of floragato days, huh?"

"Yeah..."

"Need me to drive you to the Poke-Forms place then?"

"... Well... No..."

"Okay. Careful on your way there then, don't want someone deciding to kidnap a pet sprigatito."

"No, I... What I mean is...... it'd be a waste to not use all the days I paid for, right?"

"... You're gonna stay like that?"

"... Yeah."

"For two weeks?"

"Well, I've gotten really used to this. The fur, the paws, watering my leaves-"

"So THAT'S what you were doing with that spray bottle!"

"It's just been a really... interesting experience, being a pokemon. And this was really expensive, I doubt I'll do it again for a long while, so this is my only chance to experience this. I've gotten into the groove of my new body, and I just kinda... don't feel the need to stop. You know?"

"... You mean you like it."

"... Yeah. I like it. That's... That's not weird, is it?"

"It's absolutely weird."

"No- I- Shut up! You're being a dick!"

"Come on, you've been a pokemon for a month and NOW you're scared of being weird?"

"You... make a good point. Heh, I've been a freak all this time, the least I can do is own it... Hey, I don't have hands, can you get breakfast for me?"

"Of course, short-stuff."

[adawasneverhere]

Reparations pt.1

(@) means the characters inner dialogue that other characters aren't capable of hearing.

July 23 2024 It was Carmen's fifth-teen birthday...It was also the day that her father Kenneth overdosed, she slept until 2:00 pm in the afternoon because Kenneth was being noisy like he usually was at that time and that's what scared her the most anytime it got this quiet he was usually away from the house, and was probably going to leave her with no explanation for three months or so, but this was worse, when she finally opened the door she found him on his back foaming at the mouth lying completely still, from the way it looked he was probably like that for hours while Carmen was asleep, the foam near his mouth was a little dried up. She felt so out of control, all she could really do was stand at the creek of her door and silently watch taking in the last moments of her dad.

Operator: "911 what's your emergency?"

Carmen: "Um.....my...."

She went silent for a moment holding the phone to her ear

Operator: "Hello?"

Operator: "Sweetie how old are you?"

Carmen: "I- I'm fifteen years old."

Carmen was stuttering over the phone

Operator: "Where do you live baby?"

Carmen: "I live at 1589 35 ave North Florida city, our-...my house was just recently painted white."

Carmen had a pace to her voice making it difficult to understand what she was saying

Operator: "Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down, can you tell me what happened?"

Carmen: "My dad isn't moving, he's laying on the floor with dried up foam near his mouth."

She felt a knot in her throat, she felt like she was going to cry

Operator: "We're going to send officers to your location."

Operator: "Are you okay?"

Carmen: "I guess so...nothing happened to me."

Operator: "How long has he been like that?"

Carmen: "I don't know ma'am."

Operator: "Where is your mother?"

Carmen: "I'm not sure, I've never met her."

Operator: "That's okay, what's your name?"

Carmen: "Carmen Avery Maliiese."

She stopped talking because she didn't know what to say, all she could do was silently stare at her fathers cold dead body

The police sirens were getting louder

Carmen: "I think they're here now."

Operator: "If you don't mind I'd like to have a conversation with you when you get to the station, okay?"

Carmen: "Yes ma'am."

She heard a knock on the door and hung up, then she went over and opened the door

There were three officers and a paramedic standing over her all of them had a good height

Carmen: "Hi."

Paramedic: Where is he, and what is his name?

Carmen: "His name is Kenneth Maliiese, I meant was."

Carmen opened the door all the way and pointed at the figure lying flat on the floor.

Officer: "How about you have a chat with me on the curb?"

Carmen: "Alright."

She walked over and sat on the curb.

Officer: "This must be very traumatizing for you."

@ Carmen: "Well no shit."

Carmen: "Yeah."

Officer: "You seem to be very calm about this whole thing."

Carmen: "Yeah sorry, I'm just a little tired."

Officer: "How old are you?"

Carmen: "I turned fifth-teen today."

@ Carmen: Where am I going live now? Where will I sleep tonight? I swear if they put me in foster care I'm done for.

Officer: "Oh...happy birthday!"

It was very obvious that the officer was trying to hide the disappointment in their voice but Carmen didn't find it necessary to mention it.

Carmen: "Thank you."

This whole situation made her uncomfortable so she was thinking of leaving and trying her best to avoid eye contact.

Officer: "Um...how old did you turn today?"

Her mind was so scattered she forgot that they even asked her a question.

Carmen: "Oh, I'm fifth-teen now."

@ Carmen: "Right now I just need a hot shower and a nap."

Officer: "That's cool, you're going to have a sweet six-teen next year."

Carmen: "Yeah-"

She stopped talking as soon as she saw them stringing out her dad in a body bag, the officer quickly stood up and held her hand leading her to the police car.

She could hear someone talking on their walkie talkie.

Unknown: "We checked his pulse, Mr. Maliiese is dead but we still have to-"

They quick turned the volume on the walkie talkie down and started the car.

Officer: "Sorry about that."

@Carmen: "I have ballet practice tomorrow and they didn't even let me pack my bag before we left."

The car was driving as she heard the sound of sirens ringing in her ear enforcing her headache to hurt more than ever, she could see the officer nervously glancing at her through the mirror as if they where trying to figure out what was on her mind

@Carmen: "Maybe I was a bad person in my past life, today has to be the worst day to have a deadbeat mom, I should just play subway surfers so I can get my mind off of this."

She pulled out her phone and played subway surfers to get her mind off of things but her thoughts just kept getting louder and louder

After several minutes the car finally stopped at the police station and all she could hear was this reoccurring buzzing of a fly in her ear, there were no flies to be seen though, she began to thing that it was all in her head

She sat in the empty room they left her in a vacant room, she gazed around the room it had no decor only a loud inaccurate clock on the wall

All of a sudden the door barged open, Carmen saw a woman in her thirties that looked well put together in a work wear outfit with straight tied up hair, it perplexed her but she didn't let it show on her face

Operator: Hi Carmen, I was the person talking to you over the phone. My name is Quinn, do you have anyone to stay with while we rearrange you living situations?

@Operator: I just wanted to see her face at least once, why did I even make the suggestion to interview her when she came to the station? Of course this is my baby, She looks exactly like Kenny.

Carmen: Hi.

*Quinn just took a moment to stare at her in silence, all she could think about was Kenny, Carmen looked exactly like him except as a girl, she had his face, his long legs, his awkward mannerisms, the only feature she had that didn't line up with Kenny was her eyes. Carmen had her mothers dark brown almond shaped eyes, they were so dark that they nearly looked black. Quinn just could't help but stare until she finally came back to reality, Carmen tilted her head a little to meet her eyes*

Carmen: Are you okay ma'am?

*Quinn felt like her mind was going to explode*

Quinn: Yep.

*she was nodding frantically like a crazy person*

Carmen: Oh okay...

*Carmen started avoiding eye contact again*

Operator/Quinn: Can you think of anyone you could stay with tonight?

*Carmen thought about one of the girls she was friends with in her ballet class but disregarded that idea right away because she didn't want to be a pain in the ass*

Carmen: Nope,not really.

Operator/Quinn: You don't have at least one friend?

*There was no response Carmen just stared at her blankly*

@Carmen: Did I not just give her an answer?

Operator/Quinn: Okay, well there's someone your dad listed as your godfather named August Jones, should I call him to pick you up?

@Carmen: I mean that's the only option...

Carmen: Sure, I guess...

Operator/Quinn: Okay, do me a favor and go wait down the hall for me while I call him.

*Quinn gave her a half smile but she could see that she didn't really want to smile at her, she just left in silence walking down the hall and taking one of the empty seats, there was an elderly woman over the counter who took a peak at her.*

*after 30 minutes or so Quinn came over saying that she called her godfather*

Like him- By Tyler the creator featuring Lola Young

[dream-meister-translations]

THIS HOLY NIGHT EMILIO - VOICE COLLECTION

━

"I can't remember the last time I took a vacation. I'm glad I got to spend it with you."

"That flavored tea we drank together was so warm and delicious."

"I'm still trying to decide what to wish for at the candlelight ceremony…"

"We should walk slowly today. It's snowing and slippery. Besides, I want to spend as much time with you as possible."

"Sometimes it's fun to play in the snow. Building snowmen… You and I could have a lot of fun together."

"I'm exceptionally cold today. I think it's better if we stick close. Like this. We'll keep each other warm, won't we?"

"How was your day? I felt like I was the only one who had any fun. It's making me anxious…"

"What do you want to do today? We have time. Let's figure it out together."

"I love the gift. It's like a bond between you and I. Thank you."

"Thank you. It's a nice gift. Especially from you."

"Be careful, it's called hot cocoa for a reason. I can't wait to try it, I hear it's delicious."

"When we get back to the inn, I'd like to make you a hot drink."

"I hope they have wine or whiskey."

"We should share a room. I'd like to spend as much time with you as possible. What do you think?"

"You smell kind of sweet today. I want to stay like this a while longer…"

"Your cheeks are a little red, are you cold? If so, it's better to wrap your hands around them like this. Oh, they're even redder now."

"You're really cute. No, I'm not trying to flatter you. I'm just saying what I think."

"Are you cold? You can put your hand in the pocket of my jacket if you want."

"Actually, there is one thing I've always wished for…You to be truly happy."

"You can tell me what you wish for. I'll do everything in my power to make it come true."

"Thank you, sweetie. You always notice the little things."

"Is this what you call happiness?"

"Would you like to try wrapping it around you too? It's a long scarf. There's enough room for both of us."

"No, I'm not kidding, that's how I really feel."

"It's a little cold in here, isn't it? Shall I buy you a hot drink and take you home? Or maybe I'll just give you a hug~"

"When you look up at me like that you're so cute. I could just hug you."

"You must have forgiven me to be giving me such a nice gift."

"Really anything would make me happy. The gift itself, the time you've spent with me, you sharing your feelings…"

"You're such a sweetheart…I never want to let you go."

"Oh, it's so cold. Let's hold hands for a while."

"Your ears are getting red because of the cold. Oops, did I startle you. Sorry I blew on you out of nowhere."

"Just being around you makes me smile and feel all tingly. You're really special."

"If I get used to being close to you, I'm sure I'll never want to leave. Are you okay with that?"

"I'm going to miss you so much…Sorry, thinking about leaving you while we're still in the same room together is a bad habit of mine."

"Hey, can I kiss you?"

"Whoa! You scared me. I can't believe you snuck up on me…But, I'm glad you did."

"Why are you so reserved? I don't mind you touching me."

"You can squeeze me tighter. It makes me feel closer to you."

"I never knew I was so greedy, until I met you."

"I don't think I can ever leave you… You'll have to prepare yourself."

"I want you to touch me even if it doesn't mean anything."

"When you move your fingers like that it tickles."

"You aren't doing this to anyone else are you?"

"I can't even joke about it anymore, if you had a lover in your life, I might just cut them down."

"Did you want me to care this much? Then don't hesitate, it's too late for regrets."

"Do you have any time after this? When we get back to the inn, we can stay in my room. I'd like to spend more time with you."

"You are distancing yourself from me…Still I can't help but reach out for you…"

"Even though you're usually so professional and dignified…You can also be cute and innocent at times. I find that gap between the two endearing."

"Maybe I want to think you're mine…I can't handle it…"

"Oh…When did I fall asleep? Sorry���I'm still sleepy."

"Being with you is the only thing that makes me happy."

"You're so beautiful. I feel like I'm dreaming."

"Are you afraid of me? That scared look on your face says it all…I just want you to be mine."

"You are the sun for me. If I get too close, I'll burn…If I lose you, I'll die…"

"I'm often told that the Commander and I share a similar approach to peace."

"The Commander and I often fight in the front lines together, but no matter how many times I see him in action, I'm always blown away."

"The Commander is respected by all the knights and I think he's a really great person."

"I've never won against the Commander."

"I wonder how much training the Commander had to go through to get that strength…"

"Come to think of it, snowball fights use not only physical strength, but brains as well."

"There are aspects where tactics are important, such as reading an opponent's behavior…Sometimes the Commander makes us practice while doing marching exercises in snowy mountains."

"Harriet? He's the best archer in the Knights order."

"If Harriet had the time, he would preach to every single knight about the wonders of love."

"Harriet's strengths are…Well, he's good at seeing through the inner workings of people… He has an observant eye and a strong heart that will never give up."

"This is to me? Ahahaha, um… Yeah, thank you."

"I'll take it but I'd like if you knew more about what I do and don't like."

"I'm the kind of guy who can't stand being taken advantage of."

"Will you accept my feelings? I know it isn't enough…But, I still wanted to tell you."

━

EMILIO : I don't usually get much rest…What should I do at times like this? Commander, would you like to train? ALEX : We can train, but I won't go easy on you.

━

EMILIO : This scarf and hat, I think they would look good on Emma. Don't you think so too, Fuzz? FUZZ : I think they would look better on you. Which one do you like better?

[blindrapture]

MONDAY MAY 23RD, 2011 (Donnie)

4:07 PM Far off the border from misagony and order, Mankind prepares a dance. No soldier wins when the inferno begins, No artist leaves his trance. I need an escape, I need an escape now. God, I never get tired of that song. “The Inferno Begins,” Sunsetters. Track one of Summer Sucks, beautiful rock opera. ..wait a minute. I’m actually hearing this. Someone’s playing my prog. … MOTHERFUCKER ZOMBIE IN MY ROOM HE WAS LISTENING TO MY CDS WHAT THE FUCK Godfuckingdammit, how long have I been out of it?! My barricades mustn't be working if zombies can get in, hang on let me deal with this

4:09 PM There, rooting through the kitchen YOU’RE NOT A ZOMBIE YOU’RE A GIRL “I’m so sorry, hi, I’m sorry for waking you, please don’t hurt me!” I’m not gonna hurt you! Wow! Whoa! Uh! …let me put this guitar down! “I’m really sorry for waking you. I was just looking for some food when I found your music collection. You were all curled up, so I assumed you were dead or.. or something.” It’s okay! Yeah, I have a pretty big collection. ^^; ..so yes. Where are my manners? Hello. I’m Jordan. “Donnivan.” Charmed. :D You can help yourself to my food. I don’t know where my parents are; I think it’s just you and me here. So yeah. Help yourself. “Thank you…” You don’t happen to know what’s up with the whole…… “No. No, it’s all a mystery to me too. Sorry.” It’s okay. Here, let me.. let me show you where the sausage rolls are!

4:16 PM munch munch "What are you writing? If you don't mind me asking." Oh, it's just.. a journal I've been keeping. ^^; Ever since Saturday. I'm not normally one for them, but it's helped me stay focused on things. You don't mind if I include you in here, do you? o_o;; "No, not at all!" inches closer "What kinda stuff are you writing about me?" Just the conversation. "May I see?" Sure.

4:17 PM She handed it back quick. Said she can't read my handwriting.

5:30 PM We fortified the barricades, house should be secure now, then we remarked at how electricity still works and decided to watch a film. Donnivan's really cute. .w. Tall, slim, long red hair, I rather hope she stays with me. Now we're talking about our experiences.

7:44 PM Her mum brought her along to a pub, hoping it would be safe enough, but then when Donnivan went to the bathroom, she came back to find her mother gone and a Big One crawling away down the street outside. She spent a day in shock and, after gathering her composure, started looking for food. That's her story, in so few words. I told her mine too. She doesn't recognize the weird.. rabbit hole places I went to. Then I told her about my dream. I had it after dealing with the Rake, all the way through 'til she woke me up. A lot of the dream escapes me already, but one of the more prominent images in my mind was this.. thing where I fell into a copier, a giant planet-sized copier, and lots and lots of copies of me came out, only they weren't perfect, they were all more like snapshots of me, two-dimensional pieces that hinted at the Jordan I really am but weren't. There was some kinda dreamy implication that the snapshots would grow into their own things until they no longer resemble me (maybe until Iresemble them?), and then the dream went down the usual route of faint sensations and wordless conversations. There was also this other part later on, where I was running to get away from some vaguely dangerous.. lab except it wasn't a lab but a maze that only superficially resembled a lab, when next thing I know I'm stepping into a black-and-white corridor of doors and out of one at the far end steps a taller me covered in blood, a mirror figure filled with deepest dread and unholy responsibilities. He showed up more in my dream until I finally get close enough to touch him, and I grab his face and rip it off and it's a mask and behind it was my dad. And that was that. It stuck in my mind, I dunno.

8:22 PM She’s been in the bathroom a while. o_o Donnivan? Are you alright in there? ..she's crying. Hey, I'm here if you.. if you want to talk or something. "..do you promise you're there?" Absolutely. I'll still be here once you open that door. “It’s not fair. It can’t be. Nothing about this works out.” It’ll be okay, ma’am. This red sky thing won’t last long, just you watch. Why, my friends in America haven’t even noticed any strange red skies or anything, so that tells me this can’t be all that serious! ”..really?” Yes. :D Now c’mon. What do you say we walk down to Tesco and grab some chocolate milk or something? My treat.

11:00 PM Rapture is coming.

(Attached: "Paul Blackwood said, one gorgeous evening, that the sun will always set on that same Earth on which it rises. I had no idea what he meant then, but I think he was talking about me. I was always the least mature member of the band. I turned up late to practice-- sometimes to gigs. I racked up our tabs in every bar we played, even though I also got a lot of that beer specifically so I could smash the bottles over some asshole's head. I could hardly play drums for longer than half an hour without getting bored, which made a lot of our longer songs a chore live. I didn't do much in terms of songwriting when we started, hell I couldn't write at all, not in English. But after a while, sometime after we released Summer Sucks, all that came to a halt when my father died. No, rather my self-destructive tendencies went overboard, and I'm lucky I didn't do anything serious to myself or to others. What made it then come to a halt was when the lawyer told me my father had had a massive stack of personal notebooks hidden away this whole time, that his last will and testament was that I would be given them as one last gift to his only son. I cut off all contact with the band. I went into complete seclusion, in fact, for several weeks as I read through them. These journals here are pretty unrelated to them, but something about the whole thing brought that memory back to my mind.")

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