#i never have enough time cries | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

deadn30n · 11 hours ago

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planning on streaming star rail all day tomorrow ehe. i finally stopped being lazy and reinstalled my streaming software after my haul to my new ssd

#✧ 、· ⋆ 。 OOC. ╏ i look stupid and do very little dps. »#i got a bunch of stuff in queue so replies will be posted and stuff over the next few days #i'm just #vibrating excitedly bc me and my friend yosha are gonna dual stream pso2 in the evening together #so imma play star rail while he's at work #god i miss streaming sm.......#i never have enough time cries

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inkskinned · 1 year ago

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as we enter the start of a semester and the dreaded Hour of Making Friends us upon us... if ur ever at a loss for what to say in one of those weird social situations where you only vaguely-know people, one of my favorite questions to ask is "what is your favorite food crime." a food crime is like the food combination that you love that other people find revolting. press them to take it further than pineapple on pizza, that's rote. food crimes is a good topic that has many benefits as it turns out all people are degenerates and also it will give you some cool ideas to try out later in the privacy of your own degenerate kitchen

the other good thing to ask is "okay but has anyone here ever been someplace haunted" bc it turns out if you ask most people directly they don't believe in ghosts, but many people are like "oh yeah i lived in a haunted house. ghosts aren't real tho"

#my food crime is that i regularly make a “pasta and tuna” situation that has somehow gotten even more evil and degenerate over time.#it is a ''white wine reduction'' (it's just white wine and garlic powder & seasoning)#and tuna from a can.#and plain pasta.#if i have the spoons i will actually chop garlic for it but this tends to be my comfort food for a REALLY bad day #bc its super easy to make:#boil pasta. drain. put into bowl for later. into same pot u used for pasta.#put tuna (with oil/water from can). let fry a little for like 2-3 min. put in whatever amount of wine. season to taste.#the tuna will get a little crisp on it which is nice. important side note:#this began as a Bolognese sauce.#and one day i had to sub for tuna. i know. not ideal. i cried about it too.#somehow over time it is now its own little evil thing. i would never make someone else eat it. it is beautiful.#but yeah i don't even stir the pasta in afterwards i just slap pasta into serving bowl #slap this ''''''sauce'''''''' on top #molto bene #(i really can cook fairly well btw. this is a food crime. not a suggestion of skill or ability)#(i LOVE baking but when i cook for myself. the autism is obvious. bc i just don't understand the point of most of the steps)#(.... i can just eat the deli meat out of the bag. it is protein. i don't even have to like it. i just have to eat enough calories.)#(also i used to cook MUCH more before this apartment which is so small that i can stretch my arms out and overreach the counter length.)#(.... i'm 5.2. so.)

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foxy-kitsune · 8 months ago

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thinking a lot of different thoughts as i'm making this post

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weregonnabecoolbeans · 4 months ago

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I haven’t said this enough recently but I’d like to take a moment to remind everyone…or idk…whoever sees this post…

That I love Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Thank you.

#that man is a disaster and he is the best #i love him and all his infinite sadness and regret and trauma and heartbreak and failures #and anxieties and worries and self loathing and self doubt #all his hubris and sarcasm and snarkiness and sassiness and flirtiness #and how everyone who meets him either falls in love with and/or wants him dead #i love him for all his negotiating and meditating and nerdiness #i love his ability to befriend everyone he meets and his love of animals and all living things and how hard he tries to hold onto hope #his desperate need to be good enough and his love of adventure and his tendency to get kidnapped and his hatred of flying #and above all i love him for the endless love he carries inside of him #how he fought so hard to never give up on anakin and how he spent the rest of his life watching over his kids #how he learned to be himself again after spending time with a feisty ten year old leia #how he softly cried as qui gon and satine died in his arms and how he refused to be the one to kill anakin #how he saw padme and anakin in their kids and how they reminded him to have faith in whatever remaining good there was left in the galaxy #this man had this insane life and went through so much and somehow never fell to the dark side #even when he and the ones he loved were always at the center of all that damn tragedy #yeah i love obi wan #star wars #obi wan kenobi #the clone wars #a new hope #the phantom menace #attack of the clones #revenge of the sith #obi wan kenobi series #star wars original trilogy #star wars prequel trilogy #kate's post

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reineyday · 1 year ago

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how cute is it that sanji's promo poster has him wearing a ring with zeff's cook pirates jolly roger logo? :') im so soft

#one piece #opla #one piece live action #sanji #black leg sanji #vinsmoke sanji #taz skylar #red leg zeff #THAT'S HIS DAD YOUR HONOUR #rei rambles #mb i will look it up next time to see if it's in the show but like #what if that's zeff's captain ring or smth and he gave it to sanji when he got old enough for it to fit on his finger 🥺🥺🥺#mb sanji's having one of those days where he just feels so bad that he's kind of the reason zeff never restarted his crew #and continued looking for the all blue #and then zeff is like 'no eggplant you and the baratie staff? YOU'RE my crew and i dont regret a single day of raising you'#and he gives him the ring #and then sanji cries a little and laughs and makes a joke abt how he might not regret raising him but he definitely regrets hiring him #and zeff rolls his eyes fondly #oh by 'it being in the show' i mean if zeff is wearing the ring in the flashback where he comes onboard baby sanji's ship #i digress

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unriding · 2 months ago

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hi evie !! how have you been ? :33 i hope you dont mind me borrowing you and moze for something ehehe <3

#🐦‍⬛🐕 .#彡 nick!#彡 inbox.#evie.ss #omg good morning nick! my stomach literally twisted and flipped seeing this /pos /POS /the most positive gut wrenching feeling in existence #NICK AND THE REASON WAS ? WHY DO U NOT HAVE A KOFI LINK WHERE IS IT …. THIS ISNT OK I NEED TO FIND IT???? U CANNOT BE … BE …. BE UM … YOU K #I NEED TO 😭😭😭 I NEED ….. IS IT OBVIOUSLY IM CRYING WRITING THINSSJSJSN /pos /ULTRA POS THIS IS SO CUTE UR ART IS SOOOO AWESME IM SO IN AWE😭#typos: obvious* <- & barrier* -> amazing work evie #i broke the sound banner with the screech i made seeing this …. YOU … YOU DREW ME … THE EXACT WAY ….. I .. ITS SO SPOT ON I ????? I … IM #FLABBERGASTED . SHELL SHOCKED . GOBSMACKED IM SO OBSESSED WITH HOW U DID MY HAIR …. THIS IS EXACTLY HOW I DO MY HAID … AND THE CURLS ARE LI #LIKE THAT… IM SO OBSESSED WITH UR STYLE JSJSJJD HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I SAID IT???? UR STYLE IS MMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!! 1000/1000!!!!!! in specif #the colors … the colors are gorgeous and sooo nice to gaze at … the little wings … HOW DID YOU KNOW I LIKE- IM SO . (hugs knees and cries #YOU DREW THAT DRESS AWESOME-LY …. IM GENUINELY LOSING MY MIND AND I HAVENG EVEN .. looked at *him* ….. nick …. im complimenting it and i #can’t even see rn HEJSJCKCNITS BLURRY 😭😭 my head hurts so bad from sobbing but ive never been happier /pos IM SO ???? I LOVE HOW U DREW ME #i went to go triple check for the kofilink and found myself browsing through puppetgear tag once again u^u JENDNDKXJ oh my god . PLEASEEEEE #ok…. moze … he’s … so tiny .. he’s so cute … he looks so grumpy :’) /pos AND YOU .. u captured his squishable look omg….. he’s so teeny he’#literally as big as a fingernail on my phone im :’) HES POCKET SIZED I CANT BELIEVE U DID THIS /pos /ETERNALLY GRATEFUL #WHY 😭😭😭😭😭 YOURE SO KIND IM SO . IM SITTING ON THE FLOOR OF MY ROOM SNIFFLING AND HICCUPING AHENDNJXKC AND STARING AT THIS OF COUESE #i just saw the ask 😭 i definitely don’t mind im literally on my hands and knees to thank you and it’s still not enough JSNSNDNMC i have to #dig a dent in the hole and bow inside the hole …… it’s not enough … i genuinely love every square inch of this JSNDNXN i just adore … how u #did me … how u did moze (so— everything) even the circle in the background is a color that i adore 😞😞 sniffle …..#what a treat to see moze in ur style 😭😭 what a HUGE . Nice . AMAZING. TREAT . he looks so good in ur style UGH I WANNA FLOAT AWAY #the physical reaction i had in my stomach & head is unmatched /pos …. it’s vaguely similar to when u get called on in class while nervous .#and ur stomach flips .. but in a positive / EVSTATIC / insanely happy way … thank you so much omfg (link?) (please?) you are so kind ….#i don’t even know how to convey my gratefulness so im resorting to crying-staring-crying-staring-crying #(cries)#oh i never answered ur question haha :’) yea im great! :’) and you? :’)#im gonna put this in queue >/////< URK IM SO …. THANK U NICK ))))))):::: (link perhap?)#edit: OHHHH I SEE HOW U DID MY HAIR COLOR!!!!! that is so cool hello? it’s black- but not? and it fits so perfectly!!!! THAT IS SOO COOL WJ #NO WONDER I WAS ADMIRING THE COLORS EARLIER THIS IS SUCH A COOL THING (nonartist tries to explain how neat something is) NSNDNXKK

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luck-of-the-drawings · 2 years ago

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oh the dread, oh the worry! you love your sister so much and you need to know shes okay. you trust her but you cant trust the world, and more than anything else you cant trust yourself

#jrwi riptide #jrwi fanart #jrwi riptide spoilers #jrwi show #gillion tidestrider #edyn tidestrider #RAHHH IVE HAD THIS ROTTIN IN DRAFTS FOR A BIT but im finally here n ready to POST!!!!#SO THE LIL GILLION AND EDYN ARC HUH??#gillion as a character makes me so emotional. he means so well yet sucks so bad in every way he wish he didnt #HE CARES SOO MUCH ABOUT HIS SISTER. MAN HAS NEVER CRIED EXCEPT FOR THE DAY HE SAW HER AGAIN #HE WAS SOOO HAPPY TO SEE HER AND FIND OUT SHES OKAY. I ALSO REMEMBER SCREAAAAMIN WHEN SHE FIRST APPEARED #I HAD BEEN THINKIN ABOUT EDYN FOR SO LONG... ohhh older sisters where u at... u understand... only us older sisters get it #andNOW WHERE IS SHE..? WHERE IS SHE NOW.... working with the navy to 'undo' what the undersea has done to her precious baby brother #OKAY ENOUGH EMOTIONS TIME FOR ME TO TALK ABT MY ART #REAAALLY THIS IS ONE OF MY BEST DOODLE PAGES SO FAR. IM SO PROUDA THE COLORS N THE SCENES AND THE EMOTIONS #the lil scene with edyn comforting gillion after 'a day of alot of failure. that was the first we ever saw of edyn right? i love my colors #A MIRROR! edyn painted in red when shes often blue. framed by rock and coral and memory sharing bracelets and fire.#A MEMORY! a recent event! finding her at the bar and meeting her at a tavern. its cathartic to hear your older sister tell you its okay #even more cathartic to have her remind you that you are not your tragedies. you were just a kid. you didnt deserve what happened.#you really missed having her here #OH BUT THE NEXT. A NOTE LEFT BEHIND. NOTHING ELSE. i love you a million gillion #BUT THATS NOT A REASSURANCE IS IT? its a trust fall. emphasis on the fall. emphasis on the needle in your chest as wind rushes past #you anticipate the ground but you wish you could anticipate her arms. you wish you could trust. you need to trust. so why cant you?#instead you lash out. again. just like last time. just like always. you were never good at controlling your emotions #all you do in the end is break stuff. none of them can trust you. thats why she cant tell you. thats why he didnt tell you. noone trusts yo #chips got way too many damn belts btw. put some o those back boy u do NOT need all that mess jingling around ur gay hips. you FRUIT!!!!!!!!#I liked the scene with jay n chip dragging gillion around. its a comical scene ofc and i LOVE that balance here. but that sadness remains.#they care about gillion so much..... auuwuuuu.....#OKAY FINAL THOUGHTS. I RLY LIKE DRAWING DIFFERENT TEARS FOR DIFFERENT TYPES OF CRYING #when the tears well up so big from uncontainable joy that you cant even see

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hanzajesthanza · 3 months ago

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it is absolutely so weird to me to try to imagine a version of geralt that is like, my age. like, no. get back to being an old man

#what the heck. my parents were never my age they were just spawned into the world in their 30s #i'm just kidding btw. geralt's not old. vesemir is old. but geralt is my old man #fun fact. for just about forever i thought that 'my old man' meant your father #like 'my old lady' can mean your mother #but 'my old man' actually means your husband or your lover #so when joni mitchell sang big yellow taxi. i totally misinterpreted that for my entire life #i cried to that song because of that #and funnily enough i learned the correct meaning also from her in her blue album #so yeah. i'm going to continually stubbornly use it the way i thought it #but only in contexts where it is obvious i'm talking about it in a father context #quite obviously #anyways. prequel.#young geralt is going to have less but way more worse and recent trauma #after we get this we will have to get regis: the young years where it is like 'dear diary tonight i drank so hard i threw up!'#'can't wait to do it all again tomorrow night and attempt to kill myself five times in a row!'#as i wrote that i also did think of regis re-enacting my favorite drew gooden vine #'dear diary... today i couldn't find my diary so i'm writing this on my two kung fu panda 2 dvds :)'#oh my god. wait. that is literally a philosophy regis shares #'e can easily replace what we don’t have with what we do!'#'it's simply a matter of invention and positive thinking :-)'#the elbow-high diaries #try not to make everything about emiel regis challenge (hard) (failed)

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omnxnom · 4 months ago

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im soooo sickkkkkkkuuuhhhh

all of them hereeee

#I went thru the videos for the shots and I cried AGAIN at the last episode #waiting for them to release the full version of without you #been wanting to do this for sxsg and the dark beginnings promo but never got around to it #BUT IM FINALLY FREE WITH ENOUGH TIME #take what offerings I have lol #ugh he was so cool #timed sketch practice #sxsg #sxsg dark beginnings #shadow the hedgehog #sonic fandom #sth #sonic fanart #nomdoodle #sonic x shadow generations #sonic x shadow dark beginnings #nomwip

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seraphic-sibyl · 3 months ago

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I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been

#us elections #us politics #election 2024 #i talked to an older friend today and he helped a lot #being with people helps #reminding myself that people care helps #47.5% of people in the usa care #which is a minority but at least it's close enough of a minority to a coin flip that i can always find good people #i am trying to be positive and not live out these last two months of peace in despair #being alone hurts more and i spent too much time today doomscrolling but i need some time to prepare for what i might see in the future #i do not want to make plans i do not want to make plans i should not NEED TO HAVE PLANS FOR A PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION #when i was 15 i had a whole plan for a novel i wanted to write. it was a whole carpe diem/memento mori about living life before it's over #it was going to be a good book. but now i'm not sure i believe in what i am saying enough to write it.#and i am not sure if it would be what the world needs.#but it would have been a good book. it would have been an amazing book and i didn't want to start because i didn't know how #and i wanted to wait until i had more writing and life experience to do it justice #and now i just don't have the OPTIMISM to do it justice and now it may never be written #moral of the story is write the thing NOW edit later make the thing now while you are still passionate about it existing #contrary to the contents of this post i am actually doing much better than i was this morning.#today an irl friend held my hand as i cried under a couch and an online friend reached out to make sure i am okay and i am not alone.#a lot of it is cold comfort. but at least i am regaining some faith in humanity. not all of it. i will never again have all of it.#but i will have enough.#i am a little more afraid of dying young than i was this morning and that is good. that is good.#i am not the only one who has lived through a historical event.#i will do a lot more tiredposting in the near future #especially as inauguration day comes up #but for now in the tags i feel at least a little better.#seraph rambles #seraph originals #side note: the content of the actual post is reminding me of otherkin back in like the 2010s lol remember when that was a thing on tumblr

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mycological-mariner · 19 days ago

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Love that not even a full week my partner watched The Terror they still cried genuine tears thinking about Jopson’s death to where it affected them so bad they’ve saved like a dozen pictures on their phone and now browses Etsy looking for a plushie because, I quote, “I just need a little Jopson. To hold.”

They want to watch it again this weekend

#and I can’t stress enough how LITTLE this person’s online presence is #they have a Facebook just to look at people selling re-enactment kit and that is IT.#plus they have personal family connections to polar exploration and so started with Shackleton and Scott and moved back in time #(I started with the FE when I was 11 so we met in the middle)#so they KNEW everyone was going to die. they KNEW the history of the whole thing #and it’s still traumatised them #I’ll get a text sometimes like ‘thought about jopson at work and almost cried again’#and ‘THEY FOUND THE PASSAGE’#they let me borrow their laptop when they’re at work so I jumped on and found like 20 tabs open on how to make the uniforms and pictures #of Victorian navy uniforms #they want to go to Bath as a NAVAL officer lol #keep in mind this guy has never been as into naval history as I’ve been so. aw lol #but yes I am now trying to obtain a tiny therapy jopson for them #DAVE K WHAT DID YOU DO #THEY STARTED QUESTIONING THEIR GENDER AFTER THIS SHOW. AND THEIR SEXUALITY. THEY SEE LIAM GARRIGANS FACE AND WEEP #THIS PERSON HAS FAN ART ON THEIR COMPUTER. THE TERROR FUCKIN REBOOTED THEIR ENTIRE PERSONALITY #I think this is the only popular piece of media they have ever seen and loved. zulu dawn is their favourite film for reference #that and Waterloo

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vaguely-concerned · 4 months ago

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just going about my day idly contemplating how some of the ways hawke can interact with a romanced anders are not at all unlike how they interact with leandra (and a bit of carver too, especially with a purple hawke), and then thought about my hawke in the timeline where he romances anders and was hit straight in the face with 'was he ever actually in love, or was he just desperately trying to renegotiate with his mother's ghost in any way he could' and now i need to lie down. this is the power of dragon age 2

#'you don't know my mother' haunting me through the years #dragon age #dragon age 2 #hawke #On second thought let's not go to Kirkwall; it is a silly place #there are of course as many ways to do/read that relationship as there are players to interact with it haha and all valid!#but my personal version of handers is sooo fucked up and bad times for everyone involved and I love it haha.#this is a relationship neither of them should have been in and that made everything worse and everyone unhappy in the end #locked tomb levels of the horrors of love. i ship it but in the way that I want to make it sadder and more gutwrenching each time #to be clear this is a very mutual two-way kind of fucked up but I think varric in his loyalty and love would downplay hawke's side of it #for huge swathes of their relationship anders is not in a mental place to be a good partner and the emotional blackmail is Not Okay #(but it's just like how mother used to make it! hawke's soul cries sadly as it reaches for it hungrily)#which is in some ways fair enough no one could accuse him of not warning you ahead of time fjskda #but hawke is messy about it in a way only available to a covert people pleaser who has never had a millisecond of therapy #with some added stuff that my hawke is always acespec in some form and when he gets together with anders...#is the sex something he doesn't particularly care to have or not have but it 'makes anders happy'/he longs to feel wanted *and* needed #and also a way he gets out of ever being *actually* vulnerable (which I think he'd had to be with varric for example if he Went There )#'you want the hawke who's in your head so badly and I kind of wish I were that hawke too. so let's be collaborateurs with that fantasy'#(and then maybe if I do it right every time you'll finally be happy hawke says in his heart looking at this leandra-anders phantom form)#(and echoing stuff in varric's relationship to hawke but I think the important distinction there is that varric -- is a craftsman haha #he KNOWS when he's lying/making up a story he KNOWS the difference between what is and what he wishes the world was #(I think there's some deep longing there to not know; for it to blend together or have the power to change things. but he always knows)#which ironically leaves him in a better position to actually see and understand hawke the person #even as he is creating hawke the literary figure. almost to protect him in some ways? god da2 is so full of STUFF!!! I adore it)#and of course anders gets so disillusioned with hawke's inertia and lack of action (you all but married this man anders!#you should know this about him he's already carrying the whole family and city on his shoulders if you add a gram more he'll collapse!)#and hawke feels so desperately hurt that the promise anders seemed to make that he'd be enough -- that he could fix things for him --#('I'm the one bright light in kirkwall and that apparently doesn't count for shit so I'm just slowly turning to ash for you')#turned out to be untrue. anyway. sad now. imagine them meeting like twenty years on what the fuck could you even say to each other then #(I can't imagine Hawke ever physically hurting anyone he loves so he just tells Anders to leave at the end of DA2. they COULD meet again

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solivagantingrebel · 3 months ago

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hey guys who wants another round of tmi

#ive been #this entire day has been a lot and i have no idea how to feel about it #i've never cried this much in an entire day and i can't stop myself from tearing up but it's not because of something sad or traumatic i'm #not used to being loved. or appreciated. or meant to feel like i belong anywhere. i've struggled with being excluded and ostracized and it #has been an uphill battle for a long time and deep down despite my many attempts to heal and get better i've always felt like something was #fundamentally wrong with me. it has been wrong with me from the start and whatever evidence to the contrary ive gotten was rationalised awa #by fluke or maybe people like me because of what i can provide and what i can do for them and not because of who i am and who i am will #always be tolerated or ignored at best and i genuinely was not expecting anyone but a few close friends to care about this and just. andjus #i think something in me is healing and it's still hard to accept but i can conceptualize it and any negative thought in my brain is being #countered by “hey why would you think that when people care about you” and i know it is obvious right. its something i should know but it #has always been so hard to believe that anyone would and the fact that it's hitting right now? i cant fucking stop crying #its almost fucking embarrassing im like this. im a grown ass adult. why the fuck am i still crying like this. i fucking hate trauma man #keeps making me feel like im that kid who was never loved in the ways that mattered. sorry im just #thankful. grateful. i feel like some parts of that gaping wound is stitching itself together and i cant stop crying and for once im not #crying because i'm being hurt. i'm just grateful to be here. genuinely fucking grateful that i'm alive #funny isnt it. how much love can save you if you let it #tmi #rant #embarrassed myself enough i think #sorry about that we'll go to our regularly scheduled ghoap program soon enough #i'll be okay

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cuteniaarts · 4 months ago

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The weight of the world is a heavy burden

Especially for a child

(Or, in slightly less dramatic terms – I imagine that the first of her past lives that Avatar Suiren [who is the Avatar after Aang instead of Korra in my AU, and also Ghazan and Ming-Hua’s daughter] gets to talk to is Yangchen, because she is too plagued by memories not her own [including Jetsun’s death, fun fact]. And Yangchen wouldn’t want another child to go through what she did on their own)

(Or maybe someone just needed an excuse to draw @katkastrofa’s latest obsession in a context that interests them as well, just in time to maybe cheer her up a little? You can’t prove anything)

#my art #artists on tumblr #the legend of korra #Avatar Suiren AU #Kat and Nia and their multiverse of madness #yangchen #original character #sotrl suiren #if you’re wondering what the context is. Suiren is around 8 or 9 here. already having revealed herself as the Avatar to her parents #and it has been Hard. because as much as they try to maintain a sense of normalcy for her. it’s clear that things have changed #they never accounted for their daughter turning out to be the Avatar. they hoped Aang dying on the night she was born to be a coincidence #all of their plans now have to be rethought and put on hold because her safety is more important than anything else #she is never blamed for anything. she is still just as loved. yet there’s now a heaviness in their gazes whenever they look at her #the Avatar as a concept should not exist. it is too much power and responsibility for one being who is ultimately human #that’s what Suiren was taught. so what do those teachings mean if she’s the Avatar?#basically.. a whole lot of cognitive dissonance and she hasn’t even been alive for a decade yet #and all her life her head was filled by strange memories and dreams. fragments of lives not her own. sometimes nightmares #and usually her mama would comfort her through it but tonight… she just wants to be alone #so she wanders off. not too far. but enough that she wouldn’t be heard. and just softly cries #because it’s too much. because she doesn’t want to be the Avatar. why her? why not anyone else?#and as she whispers that she wishes she wasn’t the Avatar. her mind is assaulted by memories of previous Avatars saying the same thing #it really is a never ending cycle of too much burden being placed on a single person. but that realisation is anything but comforting #she begs for it to stop because that grief of life over life spent pushing a boulder uphill is just Too Much #and before she knows it. it ceases. only to be replaced by a blue glow visible even through closed eyelids #and a feather light touch of hands on her face. it doesn’t feel exactly like human hands by virtue of belonging to a spirit #that helps her relax a little. reminding her of mama’s touch. she looks at the person who appeared before her. her mind supplies the name #‘Avatar Yangchen?’. she whispers. but the woman is nowhere near as stoic and peaceful as she’s shown to be in every depiction of her #she looks.. sad. concerned. as burdened by grief as Suiren herself is. she’s not just a legendary figure from a time long gone #not yet another past life Suiren would never measure up to. she’s… human. capable of human emotion. just like Suiren is #I’m not sure how their conversation goes and have no inspiration to come up with anything. but I just wanted to draw them interacting

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selfinflictedgunshotwound · 7 months ago

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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible

#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything #i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by #while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi #i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real #problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about #and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real #or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason #i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place #because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk #negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual #i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed #a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO #i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait #and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life #like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it #just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy #i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy #and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation #because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life #anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is #to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck

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tetzoro · 12 days ago

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You're halfway through folding laundry when two familiar hands cover over your eyes. The smell of sweat, metal and sake washes over you and you can't help but roll your eyes behind the hands as you drawl out,

“Goodness, who could it be?”

There's a slight rumble from the chest behind your head as it pulls you to it, though the hands don't move from their spot.

You give an over-exaggerated sigh before snickering out, “Okay Franky, you got-”

“Franky?! You kiddin’ me?!”

You laugh outright at the outburst, knowing it confused and infuriated your poor green haired lover all the same. Your hands drop the shirt you were folding and gently cover over the larger ones, pulling them from your eyes as you lean back into Zoros broad chest properly.

“Why the surprise?” You question, curiosity in your eyes as his steel grey one stares back down at you. An annoying tint of pink covers his cheeks as he mutters, “Can't surprise my pretty girl? Damn.” He then smirks slightly, a joking tone dancing on his lips as he presses a quick kiss to your temple as he murmurs against your skin, “Learn somethin’ new about you every damn day.”

You chuckle again, though you press a kiss of your own to each of his palms. “You trying to surprise me because it's my birthday?”

There's a chilling silence from your lover and you look up at him with wide eyes as you ask softly, “... you know it's my birthday, right?”

Zoro blinks once, twice, before he mutters in confusion, “It's your birthday?”

You gasp and swat at him, only for his laughter to break you out of your shock as his hands grip your wrist gently. “Don't be stupid, of course I know it's your birthday.” He's quick to press a few chaste kisses to your wrist before holding your palm to his cheek.

“I got somethin’ for you. You gonna come open your gift or you gonna fold laundry all damn day?”

You grin and roll your eyes again before giving another sigh, this time with a wide shrug as you tease back, “Well, I guess your gift is more important than some laundry…”

Zoro chuckles lowly at your joking tone, pulling you up as he stands straight, though he keeps his hand in yours the whole time.

“Good, because I worked damn hard pickin’ out something you'd actually like.”

You grin and slyly ask,

“And how much do you owe Nami for asking for her help?”

Zoro pretends to be wounded, holding his free hand over his heart as he snarks back, “Not a damn thing, thank you very much.”

You both stare at each other for a moment, your gaze disbelieving to the point it pulls a deep sigh from him a few moments later as he hangs his head slightly.

“... too much, Aims. Too damn much.”

You laugh again and pull him closer before getting on your tippy toes to press a few kisses to his jawline and the corner of his lips. “Zo, you could have got me a bottle of sake and I'd have cried. You didn't need to go all out.”

He grins slightly before snatching your lips up with his own, humming against them for a moment before he pulls away with a muttered,

“Just wait till you see. Promise you'll like it, no matter what it is?”

You grin in response with a slight nod, gushing in earnest, “Of course, Zo. You picked it out, how could I not love it?”

Zoro hums in agreement before pulling you into his arms, pressing another quick kiss to the top of your head before he jokes,

“Then stop wasting time and come open my gift.”

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AIMS LOVELY !!!!! I hope you don't mind the lil blurb, I saw it was your birthday and just had to write some soft Zoro for you 🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖💖 I hope your day has been as wonderful, kind and warm as you are 💖💖💖💖💖💖 ALL MY LOVE TO YOUUU !!! 💖💖💖💖💖💖🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

mandie .. MANDIE !! you did NOT just leave me the most beautiful and wonderful gif on my little doorstep ! i can not tell you how many times i’ve read this :( i am going to give you my unhinged reactions in the tags ofc but firstly !! thank you for doing this for me, i feel so incredibly touched that you put in the time to create this for me 🥺🥺 you’re so thoughtful and i am giving you the biggest hug in existence !!!! THANK YOU !! SENDING YOU SO MUCH LOVE !!! and giving you as many smooches as you want ^___^ !

now . for the fic . rubbing my hands together like a little fly hehe. let’s see if i can keep this coherent enough, shall we ? (<- said moments before i incoherently express everything)

ft. my moodboard of emotions i felt during reading btw

#RIGHT OFF THE BAT IM GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET !! i loooove love love that zoro smells like metal sake and sweat (yeah im down bad bye)#idk stinky men irl ?? no. stinky zoro? i can’t get enough.#i feel like that combo on him would be heavenly and i probably weird him out everytime i inhale it >_< OKAY WAIT IM RAMBLING #thinking he’s franky bye i know his ego hurt LOL ill kiss it better <3 mwah mwah mwah three kiss style #‘can’t surprise my pretty girl?�� <- ENOUGH. I LOVE THAT PET NAME WITH HIM IM GOING FERAL . INSANE . VISIBILY TREMBLING !!!!#damn him joking around that he forgot my bday hurt my ego now /j LMFAO guess we are even #he says that and i’d start to pout and he’d immediately backtrack before i kick off #BUT WAIT ! the kiss to the wrist :( i feel so soft and mushy :( best way to shut me up tbh #WHEN HE SAID MY NAMEEEEEE OH MANNNNN IM SHSKSJDJD YOU NEVER SEE THAT IN FICS YK SO WHEN I READ IT IM LIKE OH MY GOD HE SAID MY NAME LMFAOOO #(im delusional thank u for feeding me that was such a nice touch LOL)#‘Zo you could have got me a bottle of sake and I'd have cried.#<- this is actually so me i feel so seen rn . anytime someone does even the smallest act of kindness toward me i get all weepy #OOP THE KISS EVERYONE STOP !!!!! . . . carry on. i needed a moment thank youu #oh man :( mandie :( this gift is so special to me thank you so much for taking the time to do this :(#you have a heart of gold and i cannot even express how much this made me smile and continues to make me smile when i reread it #ILYSM !!!!!!!#⌕ — spotted .ᐟ #ᰔ 𓂃 mandie .ᐟ #(づ ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈ )づ 🎂 (∩˃ ᵕ ˂∩ ྀི)#◟˚. ꫂ ၴႅၴ ⋆ 𝓉𝓇ℯ𝒶𝓈𝓊𝓇ℯ𝓈.#🪷 ⊹ ₊ ⋆ ᴀᴍᴏʀᴏ .

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