#i need to stare at them lovingly as i imagine this beautiful alternate universe in which we get this adaptation

[scificrows]

#asr is a vlog as for the purposes of visual media murderbot must become a wannabe youtuber. unfortunate but the only option #ac is a series of instagram stories art has posted on its two weeks long first date with the love of its life #rp is mikis vlog! notably better quality than murderbots. ends very abruptly :/ #es is told by a drama youtuber breaking the situation down while putting on makeup. thank you dm me with your funding offers (tags via op)

every day we stray further away from gods light (an adaption of NE told exclusively through ratthi trying to facetime his friends back home)

[rogershasmyass]

dancing on my own

a/n: hello, i finally had guts to post my first fic after i watched the endgame ((which is weeks ago)) please bear with me, it'a my first fic and yeah, please tell me what you think because it would really help me. I really wanted to write for a very long time,, so here it is! i also wanted to improve my writing so please send me some request ♡ thank you!!!!!

ps: i'm so sorry it looks so crowded i don't know what's with tumblr i can't put spaces :((( i promise i'll edit it on a desktop :-(

pairings: steve rogers x reader

warnings: endgame spoilers???? language, lil angst, lil fluff

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"He can take his time and stay there as long as he likes, but for us, it'll only take 5 seconds." Bruce said.

We nodded. Steve, on the platform went down to hug Bucky goodbye and then to me.

"Come back in whole pieces okay?" I smiled while caressing his face. Memorizing every part of it, as if I will not see him again. I know I will. I just, feel like I will never get to hold him like this.

"I will. I love you." He said lovingly, although there's something in his eyes that I can't...ponder upon.

"I love you more. Come back alright?" I asked one more time as he went to the platform. He didn't looked back at us.

Banner started counting backwards signalling his return.

There's something I feel in my stomach, I feel something in my throat and tears are starting to dwell up. My breathing are getting uneven.

"y/n..." Bucky held my arm when I started panicking.

"He'll be back, right?" I asked Bucky. I know he knows something too.

"I lost him on the map! I can't see him!" Banner starts to push buttons frantically. Sam and Bucky were starting to lose their calm, too. Trying to figure out what went wrong.

"Bruce, I'll go find him." I said. All of them were shocked and looking at me like I'm crazy. I just needed to see him one last time.

"y/n...i'll go with you." Bucky said. I wanted to say that I'll go alone but I feel like I'm losing time.

"Take care of each other. You know how to use that, y/n, right?" Bruce assuring me.

"Yes." Determined, I went to where Steve was last seen.

xxxxx

After blasting into an unfamiliar place, I looked at Bucky, trying to find a familiar face, but he's very fascinated that he was brought back to a place he knew of dearly.

"Hey, Bucky. You know where Steve probally has gone to?" I asked him

"Oh, doll. Of course you know where he went to." Bucky trying to make the situation lighter.

"Oh God. Of course I know. I just can't say her name, it feels like swallowing poison. So, do you know where she lives?"

"I do."

"What are we waiting for? Let's go now!" I told him and basically pulled him in some direction. He laughed.

I actually don't know what to do if I found him. Will I ask him to come back to me? To the present where we started something special. Or I thought so. What will I do if I see Peggy in flesh? What exactly am I doing here?

"Hey doll?" Bucky interrupted my thinking.

"Hey, buck. Are we there yet?" I asked him. We were on a cab to Peggy's house.

"No not yet. Penny for your thoughts?" He asked me.

"Nothing...I'm just very amazed at how beautiful and simple it is back then." I lied, I wasn't even paying attention to where were going.

"What are you planning to do? Once you see him?" Bucky asked me.

"I...I don't know. I feel like being selfish if I ask him to come back. I actually don't know what we're doing here. It's getting dark, Buck. I think...I think we should just go back. In fact, it's Peggy we're talking about here. She...she was his first love and what am I to compare to her? Let's go back, Bucky. I just can't bear to see it, whatever's I'm going to see." I said almost out of breath.

Bucky looked at me with sad eyes. "Too late, doll. We're already here." I glanced outside and saw a decent and big old house, well probably not old, since we went back, it probably was a kind of house that's in in these time. We went out of the cab and stood outside.

"Bucky let's go back. I think it's someones birthday or Steve's welcome party or.. I...let's just go back." I begged him and grabbed his arm. I noticed there's something in the backyard, it's full of people and contained a lot of decorations.

"Wait do you hear that song, y/n?"

A slow song played by a band was playing, and who would forget this song? It's my captain's favorite.

I wandered on his room in the Avenger's headquarters after one of Tony's extravagant party. It's been 7 months since we officially started dating. Although, we have been testing the waters for almost 5 years now since I joined the team.

"Hey, cap." I asked him while just cuddling on the bed, almost sleepy. "What's your favorite song?"

"It's been a long, long time." He answered while kissing the top of my head.

"I know it's been a long time, love." I joked.

"Silly, it's the title. You hear it all the time" He laughed at my silly joke.

"I don't think I get to finish the song. You know, I fall asleep on your choice of songs." I pouted and he kissed me. "I wanna listen to it!" I sat on the bed, wanting to listen to it enthusiastically. "Come on, love. Play it for me!" I pointed at his turntable and gave him my puppy eyes I know he can't resist.

"Promise me, you won't fall asleep?" 

"I won't! I promise!"

"What my baby wants, my baby gets." He walked over to the turntable and placed the CD on. The slow song started to play.

"You wanna dance, cap?" I asked him, but immediately regretted it. I remembered Peggy and their promise to dance with each other. And you know, their history.

"Do you wanna dance?" He asked me.

"I do. But only if you're ready." I smiled at him reassuringly that it's fine by me. I went over to him and hugged him. We stayed on that position for a while when he asked me, "Have you danced before, y/n?"

"Like a slow dance? I haven't."

"Why?"

"Because you aren't ready yet."

"I'll dance with you when I completely let go of my past."

"I'll wait for it even if it takes forever."

He chuckled. "Alright. Let's get you to bed, you're getting sleepy. I love you, you sleepyhead."

"I love you more."

I looked over to the backyard, closer to get a better look. They have guests, who are dressed formally. The yard was decorated by balloons, flowers, there's a large cake and a band playing my cap's favorite song. I went to look at the other side and my whole world shattered before me. My eyes were producing tears uncontrollably and my knees got weak literally, Bucky caught me just in time.

Steve, the love of my life, got his most awaited dance. After 70 long years. With the woman he truly loved.

"Rogers got his fucking dance, Bucky. It's so...unfair." I was sobbing into his arms while holding my mouth, afraid that if my voice gets too loud, people might see us.

"Hey, y/n... calm down a little bit, you're breathing's not normal anymore." Bucky warned me. I have asthma but that's not the problem now.

"Bucky.....they..got..mar..married. Does he even plan on telling us? H...he should have atleast told us? I would have understand because I kind of expected this to happen ever since that time machine idea was brought up. It should have hurted less if he just told us, but instead he..made us worried by not being in his timestamp, and now...we're seeing him...having the time of his life, dancing and getting married, for fucks sake!!!!! while we're fucking worried of his whereabouts?????? He could have just fucking told me!!!!!"

I wept on the grass leaning on the yard with Bucky. As if my whining will bring Steve back to us. We stayed there for 5 more songs, staring into the grass in front of us, hearing the people's chattering and the celebrations for the newly weds. We once heard the people clinking their glasses with their forks, signalling them to kiss. Of course, I burst into tears again.

"Let's go back, y/n" Bucky stood up and offered his arm to me.

"Let's go." I wiped my tears and pressed on the device that will let us back home. I didn't even managed to look back to the party. I don't think I can handle it.

x

"Have you found him? Where's Steve?" Bruce asked, Sam waiting for answers. Bucky smiled sadly.

"Having the time of his life." I told them and smiled bitterly. "He got his dance, Sam...Steve got his dance..and his girl. He..looked so happy." I felt like crying again, but no tears came. Probably spent it all way back there.

"y/n..." they called out to me, feeling sorry.

"I'll be in my room. I'll be fine. I just wanted to rest." I assured them.

I laid on my bed for God knows how long. I looked on the other side where Steve's smell still lingers. Not wanting to cry again, I stoop up and put on the CD in the turntable and played his favorite song.

I closed my eyes and body swayed a little, imagining he's dancing with me. 

"You know what...? You're so unfair, Rogers. You got your dance and I got nothing. Well, as they say, promises are meant to be broken. But you are not one to break promises. You even went back in time to have your dance with Peggy, while a band plays." I tried to smile. "But I am so happy for you, my love. I truly am..." 

Maybe in an alternate universe, it's you and I.

Maybe in an alternate universe it's just you and me, no past haunting you, no obligations to the world, no fallen family. No lost time. Just us, living together happily.

A tear finally fell from my cheeks and the music stopped. I wiped it away, then proceeded to remove the CD from the turntable.

"Oh fucking hell, I lost my sanity. First I'm dancing alone and talking to myself. Fuck you, Rogers. The things you do to me." I chuckled to myself 

"Language."

You stopped and turned to look where you heard the voice. Your man, the love of your life, your captain, was standing by your door.

[comicteaparty]

September 23rd-September 29th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from September 23rd, 2019 to September 29th, 2019.  The chat focused on Neguri-Senpai by Neguri Senpai.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Neguri-Senpai by Neguri Senpai~! (http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PDT), so keep checking back for more! You have until September 29th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. Of all the strips in the comic, which joke/scenario did you find particularly relatable in terms of what it’s like to be at school or crushing on someone? In what ways did it make you reflect on life or how media portrays these situations?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 4. Given the comic features a lot of pop culture references, which of those has been your favorite so far? What about it really made you smile, and what do you think the comic can teach us in terms of how pop culture can be used for comedy?

mariah (rainy day dreams)

1. My favorite scenes have been where Aoi tries to recreate Neguri-senpai in various forms of media. I found the video game one particularly funny X') I really like the contrast of how proud Aoi is of her creation but how off they are from the original. It reminds me of how much I loved all my badly drawn husbando fan art as a kiddo. http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/02/neguri-senpai-new-game.html?m=1 2. I think Aoi's eavesdropping and creeping on Sana when it comes to Neguri-senpai is pretty relatable. I definitely have felt a similar anxiety about perceived romantic rivals in the past. I think the strip where it turns out Sana was just talking about her cat is a really good example of this. http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/01/neguri-senpai-what-did-you-just-say.html?m=1 As far as reflecting on life and media goes, while I think the feeling captured rings true to life, it also makes me kind of bummed that these two's relationship is just fighting over a guy (who I assume is unattainable since he's a teacher? But then again who knows since it's playing on manga tropes). I feel like that kind of angst is common for the teenage girl experience, but I also wonder if part of that is because it's a trope that's so reinforced by media that it just becomes expected. Anyways, two girls fighting over a guy makes me sad if I think about it too long. This has been my TED talk.

3. I think Sana is my favorite character. Maybe exclusively for her goth socks XD Aoi is also very good. 4. Man, my only experience with JoJo is the one episode I watched and all the Twitter memes so I feel like most of those jokes are probably lost on me TuT I do really love whenever someone yells NANI??? though XD I laughed a little every time reading through. I also don't get a lot of the coding jokes, but the ones I do understand have really landed home

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What has been your favorite composition in the comic so far? What specifically about it do you like?

QUESTION 6. Do you believe that Aoi will ever be able to date Neguri Senpai? If so, how do you imagine that would happen? If not, how do you think the comic will comedically resolve Aoi’s crush on Neguri Senpai?

RebelVampire

1) My favorite strip so far I think is this one http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/08/neguri-senpai-alone-on-roof.html where Aoi is suspiciously summoned to the roof but whoops, nope, it's just for a picture. I really like how this strip plays with the Japanese school roof trope cause it makes the comedic payoff that much sweeter when it's not any romantic or delinquent things. 2) A strip I found super relatable about going to school was this one http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/07/neguri-senpai-finals.html where all the girls are discussing whether or not they failed a test. I think basically everyone has done that after a test, regardless of confidence, so it's just one of those moments that I think is universally connecting. I do not miss the stress of worrying about passing or failing a test. XD In terms of reflection, it did make me think that of all the school tropes media messes up, this is actually one that is very spot on to what real life is like, which is pretty rare. Yet, makes for good comedy because of this quality of being universally relatable.

3) My favorite character at the moment is probably Aoi. I just like how earnest she is, how crazy day dreamy, and how enthusiastic she is. It's the perfect combo where even her personality flaws really seem endearing, so I want to see her achieve happiness. 4) My favorite so far was this one where Aoi thought of Speedwagon: http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/05/neguri-senpai-i-need-man-like-that.html While I don't know a whole lot about Jojo having been banned from watching it, my boyfriend really loves Jojo. So through him there is one fact I do know, and that's Speedwagon is a beloved character. So it really made me smile to see this show up in the comic and be proven true. XD In terms of what the comic teaches about how pop culture can be used for comedy, I think the biggest lesson is that it's a double-edged sword. If the people know what it being referenced, immediately creates that connection that's needed for comedy. But on the flip side, all those references will fall flat if the person doesn't know the references. So it's great to use, but also gonna be hitting some really niche audiences.

5) My fave composition is the last panel from this strip http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/03/neguri-senpai-judgement.html WHat can I saw? I'm a big fan of angles and the whole dark overshadow thing to bring that nice oppressive atmosphere. It really sells the joke. 6) Until the end of the comic, I think the only date Aoi will get will be a joke one. Like one of those ones where she tots think she's going on a date but nah, Neguri Senpai just wanted her for some mundane reason. Like running errands for the school. But I do feel overall if and when the comic ends, it'll be on a happy note with Aoi getting with Neguri Senpai. If only cause there is no comedic rival yet after Aoi.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you?

QUESTION 8. Of the fourth wall breaks in the comic, which one did you find the most interesting and why? In what ways were this comic’s fourth wall breaks unique compared to other comic’s that do it?

Ash🦀

1. I actually really loved the lovingly recreated video game version of Neguri-San who dies five minutes later, as I found it to be the most relatable. I too take five hundred hours in character creation only to remember I have no hand-eye coordination. Also, I was quite glad when they showed Neguri-San’s younger self, because until that moment I thought he was another student and so I was quite confused. Not the dynamic I personally go for but it cleared up so much of my confusion. 2. When they’re all on the beach comparing bodies and Aoi’s like “but how will I compete with someone built so beautiful?” Man that was a MOOD. Been in a committed relationship almost 9 years though so I guess I figured it out. Also, if that’s foreshadowing Aoi’s eventual fall for Sana, that would be the best. 3. Sana is my favorite, because she plays off Aoi so well and seems like a capable and headstrong young woman. She’s really fun to watch. 4. The speed wagon joke was hilarious and you cannot change my mind. Also, wish I understood a lick of coding. 5. The strip when Aoi and Sana were in the classroom and Aoi was staring menacingly? Honestly? The best use of comedic tension that I saw. 6. I highly doubt it. She’s a student, and while it’s cute of her to have a crush, it would be inappropriate for it to be reciprocated. 7. I really enjoy Sana and Aoi interacting. I find their rivalry the most interesting, because Sana seems the most capable rival. She’s smart, she’s driven, and it’ll probably come to a final showdown with her. Also, her stand actually got me to nose exhale, which doesn’t sound like much, but before noon it is a monumental feat. I’d love to see them more directly interacting rather than talking about each other. and heck, maybe they’ll be the couple in the end. Love a good rivals to something more story. 8. Honestly I’m not too big a fan of wall breaks, but it does give me a chuckle every time they blame the author.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What sorts of details have you noticed in the way the comic is crafted that you think deserves attention?

QUESTION 10. The comic also features a lot of references to computer science and programming, so which of those has been your favorite? Alternatively, which concepts do you wish you understood more to get the joke?

The Q

9. I think the layout is really funny. This comic wouldn't have worked as well with a "traditional" print-style format. The jokes are well-paced, too, something we don't often think about when we (well, I) read commics! 10. WHAT ARE STICKY KEYS FOR? I know them as the annoying suggestion that pops up everytime I use my shift key too much... In general, I can feel a lot of the programming jokes fly right over my head, which is too bad, but that probably just means that I wasn't ever the intended target audience anyway. And that's okay. Honorable mention: the last panel of this strip http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/08/neguri-senpai-animal-friendly.html is adorable!

RebelVampire

7) I think I enjoy seeing Aoi interact with Sana. They just have a really cute but funny comedic rivalry that is enjoyable to see unfold. Even when they aren't directly talking to one another their attitudes towards each other is pretty entertaining in itself, which is always a good sign. 8) I really enjoy the merch plug strip http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/06/neguri-senpai-what-big-number.html if only because Aoi's face and reaction to that is hilarious and seeing Neguri Senpai enthusiastic about something just...it's laughs all around. Which while there are certainly comic's that do fourth wall breaks like this for self promo, I find this comic to be a bit unique just cause of its execution of the comedy. It doesn't really toe the line with what it is (which is something I see a lot), so I appreciate the energy of upfront in the face nature about it.

9) I really like all the little programming inserts in the comic. Like a lot fo the jokes surrounding them are so specific that I think for a lot of people they fly under the radar. But I like the accuracy for them. It's like that sort of niche inclusion that doesn't hurt the other comedy but really adds a nice chuckle factor for when you do recognize the joke being made. 10) And speaking of the above, my favorite one was definitely this one: http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/03/neguri-senpai-judgement.html I have been on both sides of that situation before, and like the accuracy is on point. You're always going to judge people for their code editor of choice regardless of language involved. But I like that even if you don't specifically understand that part about it, it's still relateable in that one of them is being singled out for a potentially bad choice in a comedic manner. So just all around, A+ for that strip.

snuffysam

Oh man, this comic is a lot of fun. I think this was the joke I laughed the hardest just due to the nonchalant pacing of it - http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/2019/01/neguri-senpai-what-did-you-just-say.html My favorite character is probably Neguri. He's seen as this god by all the girls, yet he's awkward and almost a literal blank slate character. That sort of subtle humor is just really funny to me, so he's my pick.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 11. What do you think are this particular comic’s strengths? What do you think makes this comic unique? Please elaborate.

QUESTION 12. Of Aoi’s rivals for Neguri Senpai, which one do you find the most interesting, especially in regards to their dynamic with Aoi? What other sorts of rivals are you hoping to see?

snuffysam

I think the comic's biggest strength is, for lack of a better word, how bizarre it is. Like the comic does have recurring themes of course (programming jokes, pop culture references, parodies of the school romance genre), but in terms of each individual strip I have no way of predicting what'll happen next.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 13. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

QUESTION 14. In general, what other sorts of comedic gags are you hoping to see in the comic? Alternatively, where are you hoping the loose story found within the comic goes?

RebelVampire

11) I have to agree with @snuffysam here on strengths. I think the comic is just extremely unique. Like individually you can find aspects in other comics, but all together it makes for a one-of-a-kind experience you cant really predict. And unpredictability is good for this sort of comic since its keeps things interesting. 12) It's definitely gotta be Sana imo. I think even if Neguri wasn't in the picture, they'd be destined rivals who would compete over everything. Yet they're both equally kind of exaggerated in personality in ways I would not peg for the typical sort of girl rivalry you see for school comics like this. In terms of other rivals, I hope Aoi has to deal with like a secret admirer one so that she can't exactly confront that rival. Maybe go the mystery detective route trying to figure out who it is.

13) I'm looking forward to more A+ programming jokes. They have some catching up to do if they want to compete with all the Jojo references. But also as I've complimented them, I just overall enjoy them a lot. 14) I'm actually hoping to see more gags with that one rival (whose name i forget) who is extremely blunt and vulgar about her intentions towards Neguri. Just the concept super entertains me, so I'm really hoping she gets to be in more gags that involve wordplays and stuff.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Neguri-Senpai this week! Please also give a special thank you to Neguri Senpai for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Neguri-Senpai, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: http://neguri-senpai.blogspot.com/

Neguri Senpai’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/negurisenpai

Neguri Senpai’s Merch Shop: https://streamlabs.com/negurisenpai/merch

Neguri Senpai’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/NeguriSenpai