#i need to get out of that way of thinking cause it’s making my life miserable

[hees-mine]

Always - L. HS

Pairing: heeseung X fem reader

Warnings: smut, unprotected sex, dirty talk, cursing, angst.

Genre: brothers best friend.

WC: 4k+

Posting this here because i want to get it out of my drafts since it’s been there forever it’s old so it’s not good but oh well lowkey want to make another story with this trope though 👀 a better one

-

“Sure you don’t want to come with?” Your brother Jake cracks open your bedroom door, checking with you one last time.

“I’m sure I’m not feeling well today, so I think I’ll just stay home,” you told him a little white lie, pulling your blankets up to your chest.

“Alright I’ll be back in an hour or so do you need anything?” He asks like the caring brother he is.

“Sleep,” you reply with a chuckle.

“Alright,” he laughs softly and turns off the light in your room.

As soon as you heard the door close from downstairs, you texted heeseung, your brother’s best friend and the guy you’ve been hooking up with for the past couple of months.

Ever since Jake introduced you to heeseung, there was definitely undeniable tension between the two of you, but you both ignored it cause he didn’t want to break the bro code, and you didn’t want to disappoint your brother, so both of you kept your hands to yourselves.

That seemed to be working until you both entered college together, and to celebrate everyone’s success of getting into college, one of your mutuals threw a house party you had to attend cause you were one of the people being celebrated, and obviously, so was heeseung.

That night, neither of you could keep your eyes off the other. It started out with flirty glances and winks from across the room; then, after a few shots, it progressed into you both dancing together, him behind you, holding your waist while you sway your hips to the beat, feeling the unmistakable hardness in his jeans.

The alcohol in your system and the way his hot breath fanned across your face whenever he complimented your figure had you melting into him, and what made you give in completely was the subtle but very effective rolls of his hips, his hard-on brushing against your ass had you pulsing and dripping with need, and evidently, he was just as needy cause the words finally rolled off his tongue. “Let’s go upstairs.” With one last glance around the party, your brother was nowhere in sight, and you both snuck off to a vacant bedroom where he gave you the best night of your life.

He fucked you so good after years of being pent up he released all of his want for you in one night, giving you round after round till you both were numb and shaking with unspeakable pleasure.

That night led you both to hooking up behind your brother’s back you both felt guilty that’s for sure but now that you had a taste of each other there was no way you’d be stopping anytime soon.

Which is why your fingers are excitedly moving across your keypad to set up another hookup.

“My brother just went to the mall. Do you want to come over?”

“Finally, I’ll be over in ten. Be ready when I arrive ;)”

You smile at his text and pull the blankets back, going downstairs to unlock the door for his arrival. You quickly go back upstairs, slipping off every article of clothing before getting back onto the bed and waiting for heeseung.

He seems to arrive earlier than ten minutes he may or may not have sped on the way there he parked a few blocks away to hide his car just in case and made his way to the door not bothering to knock cause he knew you always kept it unlocked for him and besides this was like his second home with as much time as he spent here with Jake he opened the door and headed upstairs straight to your bedroom.

He knocked gently his eyebrows raising with amusement cause the door was already cracked all he had to do was push it open and there you were sitting there looking all pretty underneath the covers. “Hey” he says quietly and steps inside shutting the door behind him.

“Hey,” you reply flirtatiously and peel back the covers, showing off your body.

He bites his bottom lip and tosses his jacket to the side of the room, easily slipping off his shoes, which he didn’t even bother to untie.

You watch him undress, your body already heating up with anticipation.

His shirt comes off next, and he walks to the edge of the bed and climbs on top, crawling over to you until he’s hovering over your naked body. “Always look so fucking pretty for me” he kissed your shoulder, and you wrapped your arms around his neck spreading your legs so he could get in between them.

“I try” You chuckle softly, and he captures your lips in a kiss slotting himself between your legs and pressing his semi-hard cock right against your pussy, causing you to moan of course, he uses the opportunity to slip his tongue inside of your mouth, exploring every last inch of you.

Tangling your hands in his hair, you bring him as close to you as possible, kissing him with just as much desire as he does with you.

When it becomes difficult to breathe, he pulls away the string of saliva between the two of you, getting lost as he starts to kiss down your neck. “Hmm, hee,” his hands trail down your sides, softly tickling your flesh before gripping your waist tightly and rutting himself against your naked pussy your wetness surely staining his sweats.

He nips at the skin of your neck, his hot breath sending a shiver down your spine as you buck your hips up into him. “Fuck baby, I can’t wait anymore” he pulls back, staring into your eyes, his eyes full of lust.

“That’s good cause we only have an hour,” you chuckle, running your hands down his chest til you reach the waistband of his sweats, pulling them down along with his underwear till his cock falls out he, ’s rock-hard precum leaking at the tip of his shaft twitching as he catches the way you stare at his length between your legs.

Once you pull his clothing down his thighs, he takes the reins, slipping the two articles down to his ankles, too impatient to get fully undressed. “Turn over. Wanna fuck that pretty little pussy from behind.”

Not one ounce of shame runs through your veins as you turn over on your stomach at record speed, presenting your holes to him.

“That’s it” he bites his lip spanking your ass, and watching it jiggle, he places both of his palms on your ass, kneading softly as he slots his length between your round ass cheeks. “Shit,” he whispers to himself, loving the way his precum stains your beautiful skin. “Ass up for me” You arch your back, burying your face into your pillows as you feel his tip prodding at your pussy lips. “Look at that pussy so wet for me” he slips his first finger in you, groaning at the feeling of your warm cunt clenching around his finger. He added another alongside his index one, and your walls welcomed him with ease. Your sticky wetness aids the process of stretching you out. “Fuck you’re taking my fingers so well could probably just slip my cock in you right now.”

“Yes please I can take it” you laid your cheek on the pillow heart pounding with anticipation as your breath quickens.

“Yeah? Want me to put it in you?” he curled his fingers inside you, causing your walls to clench yet again.

“Fuck yes, please stick it inside me, hee” Your breath gets sucked out of you the moment you feel his bulbous tip enter you.

You’ve been wanting this for the past few weeks and finally you were able to get what you’ve been craving for.

He lets out a sharp breath sinking his hard cock all the way inside you till he bottoms out. “So tight and warm,” he moans softly, his head rolling back as he holds your waist, adjusting to the wet sensation encasing his cock.

Your mouth parts in a gasp, legs going numb as you feel him stretch you out so good.

You grip the sheets, your walls clenching and unclenching around his thick pulsing cock.

He withdrew himself, pulling out until nothing but the tip was left inside and then thrusting forward, filling you up to the brim. “God damn, you always feel so fucking good,” he grunts, creating a steady rhythm sliding in and out of your wet pussy.

“Fuck” you breathe out, eyes tightly closing shut as you focus on the pleasure of his thick length rubbing against your walls so deliciously.

“Yeah? Feel good, baby?” He grabs hold of your shoulders for leverage, stroking your walls perfectly. “Taking it so deep for me,” he smirks, watching the way your pussy lips welcome his cock so warmly. “You like it deep, huh?” His eyes are lidded as he witnesses the sight of your juices, creating a creamy white ring of arousal around his base.

“Yes, love feeling your cock d-deep inside m-me fuck heeseung,” you whimper, unable to contain the way your walls squeeze around him.

“Fuck you’re so tight I’m not gonna last long,” he huffs, speeding up the movement of his hips. It felt too good to slow down the sound of his skin slapping against yours, making him even more feral. “Fuck fuck fuck” he lowers his hands to your waist, holding you still, but the force of his thrusts has you sliding up the bed, his cock head kissing your cervix with every thrust.

“Yes, please don’t stop right there,” you whine, toes curling as you gush around his cock, creating the wettest sounds you ever heard.

“Hear that baby? Your little pussy is talking to me. You must really be enjoying my dick, huh?” He asks, knowing full well you love how he fucks every single time.

“Hmm, yes,” you whine, feeling your high approaching.

“You close? I can feel you clenching on my dick so hard” he lets out a laugh, fingertips pressing into your sides, his balls loudly smacking your ass as his thrusts turn erratic.

“So close,” you mewl.

“M-me too gonna fill this pussy up make it even more creamy baby,” he grunts, thrusting like an animal in heat. Both of you are so close the familiar warm tingling sensation spreads throughout both your bodies.

You could feel it just a second away, but the sound of his phone ringing made you lose focus.

“Fuck” he grunts in frustration. His hand leaves your waist messily, reaching for his phone so he can shut it off and focus back on what’s really important, except when he reads the caller ID, his heart races. “Shit, it’s your brother,” he sighs, slowing the pace of his hips but still fucking his cock deep into you.

“Just ignore it,” you complain, wiggling your ass against him, trying to get him to speed up again.

“I can’t just keep quiet yeah” he takes a deep breath before answering. “Hello?”

“Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to come over I was just at GameStop, and I bought a few new games” heeseung presses your lower back down, arching you further so he can reach even deeper, and you use every last ounce of strength not to moan out loud from the feeling of his thick cock reaching the depths of your pussy.

“S-sure, what time are you fuck-“ he hisses as another gush of wetness releases around his cock. “What time are you thinking?” He swallows thickly, his breathing becoming heavier with each stroke. He’s too close right now. As soon as the call ends, he’s gonna release his load deep inside your sweet juicy pussy and give you what you deserve.

“I’m on my way home in about fifteen. I’ll probably take a shower too, so in about half an hour,” heeseung tries his best to focus on what his best friend is saying, but it’s hard when your pussy squeezes his cock so tight.

“S-sounds good. I’ll come over in about 45 minutes,” he groans softly, but it could still be picked up over the line.

“You okay? You sound weird,” Jake says on the other line.

Heeseung panic’s initially but then comes up with the most feasible answer he can think of. “I’m good just out of energy getting in a really really good workout” he bites his lip to hold in a moan.

“Alright, well, enjoy your workout. See you tonight,”

“See you tonight” heeseung hits the end call button at lightning speed, and as soon as his phone hits the mattress, he’s gripping your hip and fucking into you like a wild beast, his thick cock fucking your walls to no end. You’re screaming mess nonstop, moans and cries of his name spilling from your pretty lips. “Fuck yeah, baby, scream my fucking name”

“Heeseung!” You cry even louder as he snakes his hand under your waist and starts rubbing your clit. “Oh fuck I’m coming. I’m coming, heeseung!” You shriek, your eyes rolling back as you shake violently on the bed, your pussy pulsating around him.

“Yeah, let go for me, cum all over this dick,” he hums. “Gonna pump you full of my cum, baby. Want that?”

“Yes,” you whimper breathlessly.

“Oh fuck I’m gonna give it to you” After one last thrust, he’s emptying his huge load in your hole. “Shit baby, I’m cumming, I’m cumming” he grunts, hips wildly bucking into you, riding out his high, drilling into your heat, and filling you up to the brim with his cum. “Shit baby,” he throws his head back, panting heavily.

“Hmm,” you moan in satisfaction, his hands running all over your body, helping you come back down from the earth-shattering orgasm. You sink into the mattress, and he lays on top of you, panting as he leaves stray kisses all over your cheek, lips, and shoulders.

You both lay like that for a while, regaining your strength and being able to move again.

Everything is silent save for the short breaths you both let out. “Shit baby, I want you again already,” he chuckles against your ear biting your lobe softly as he rolls his hips sensually, pushing his cum deeper in you.

“Hee,” you whine at the feeling of his cock inside you. “I wish we could, but my brothers gonna be home soon,” you whisper.

“Fuck I wish he would leave more often. Going weeks without feeling your pussy is torture,” he laughs and rests his cheek on yours, relishing in the aftermath before he gets ready to leave.

Just before he begins to part from your body, you both hear the front door shut. “Shit,” heeseung slowly pulls out of your hole, both of you hissing at the loss of contact as all his cum streams from your hole.

You popped up out of bed, searching for his clothes so he could get dressed and leave a thick trail of white dripping down your thighs. “I thought he said half an hour!” You whisper yelled

“Me too,” he says, hopping on one foot to put his shoes back on.

“You have to go now,” you tell him urgently and open your window.

“Really?!” He whispers, knowing the window isn’t exactly close to the ground.

“Yes, now hurry.” he walks past you and doesn’t miss the mess he made between your legs. “Fuck” he shakes his head in disbelief. He can’t believe he had to leave you like that. If he had it his way, he’d fill you up all night long, but sadly, your brother and his best friend had to ruin it. “Kiss me,” he quickly whispered, and you gave him a little peck on the lips.

He goes out the window doing his best not to make a lot of noise and trying to grab anything for some type of leverage so he wouldn’t slip and fall.

After he got about half way he let go dropping to the ground softly and scurrying to his car to wait inside for another half hour and pretend like he had just arrived.

With a sigh of relief, you went to the bathroom to shower before bed.

That was close, almost too close.

-

As close of a call as that was, that still wasn’t gonna stop you from seeing heeseung again.

You were quite literally addicted to him.

But he was having other thoughts.

“Are you coming over tonight my brother is out again” this time you’d called him instead of texting.

“Nah, last time was close enough, and to be honest, I don’t think we should push our luck. Let’s just call this off.”

“Call it off?” You’re a bit surprised by that you weren’t expecting that would be his response but you understood where he was coming from.

Not to say you liked it, though.

“Yeah it’s not worth it anymore id like to live and if your brother catches me balls deep inside his sister I doubt he’d let me live” he chuckles but you don’t really find it to be that funny especially how he said it wasn’t worth it anymore.

“Well… okay I guess I’ll see you next time you and my brother hangout” you mumble a bit disappointed but you understood it was risky and you can’t really blame him for calling it quits.

“You will, dollface. It was fun while it lasted,” you smile faintly.

“Yeah…. Bye,” he ended the call first, and you tossed your phone to the side, sighing. Who were you going to get sex from now?

That question would be answered within just a few hours. Apparently, not just heeseung was hanging out with Jake today, but his friend Jay as well. You knew him well. He hadn’t been around much lately, but you did have a good relationship with him.

And now that you think about it, he was attractive, nice, and a good friend.

You’re sure he’s probably good in bed, too.

“Hi, Jay!” You cheered as he entered, already putting your plan in motion.

“Hey y/n! It’s been a while.” he walks over to you, ready to give you a side hug, but you pull him in a full hug, pressing yourself against his body. “Did you miss me or something?” he laughs awkwardly, wrapping his arms around you and hugging you just as warmly.

“Yeah plus I didn’t know you’d be coming over” you pull away from the hug hands still resting on his shoulders.

“Yeah, it was heeseung’s idea.” you both looked at heeseung, and he was just standing there already, staring at the two of you and your hands on Jay's shoulders.

“Good idea, heeseung. It’s nice seeing you after so long, Jay,” you smile, taking a seat.

“You too, y/n.” he offers you a warm smile, greeting everyone else as he takes off his jacket and shoes.

“Well, we were gonna play games, but since y/n seems excited to hang out with us, how about a movie instead so she can join us?” Jake suggested that since you weren’t into video games that much,

“Sounds good to me,” Jay agrees.

“No, id rath-“Heeseung got shut down immediately by Jake.

“Three against one, you lose; besides, we game all the time anyways,” Jake concluded and sat on the couch searching for a movie.

Once the movie was picked, you all went to the kitchen to prepare snacks and drinks for the movie night once you got all settled in, you took a seat on the couch when heeseung saw where you were sitting, he moved over to you, but since the conversation you both had last time you didn’t want to sit next to him you couldn’t be that close to him not when you were literally thirsting for him how could someone look so good in a baggy shirt and pants you had no idea, but your panties definitely did as they were already damp just feeling him so close was doing things to you.

The fact you couldn’t act on those things was torture.

So you got up and sat next to Jay, who was on the bigger couch, leaving heeseung to sit all alone. He watched you sitting next to Jay, laughing together at some scene in the movie that he couldn’t even pay attention to cause he was too upset seeing you both that close together.

Since when did you have so much fun with Jay?

Heeseung was unknowingly sulking each time you laughed or pushed Jay on the shoulder even the way you both ate out of the same bowl made him feel weird.

He folded his arms across his chest, jaw tightly clenched. After he saw you both feeding popcorn to each other, he had to stop watching you two before he lost it. “You got any alcohol?” He asked Jake cause he’d definitely need something to numb whatever dumb aching feeling that was in his chest.

“Top cabinet.” he nodded and stood up.

“The popcorn needs a refill,” you announced and went to the kitchen a few moments after heeseung.

“Woah, slow down,” you said and giggled when you saw him downing a bottle of liquor.

“I should say the same to you.” he chuckled and threw his head back, taking another shot.

“Come again? I’m not the one drowning in booze,” you laugh, opening another bag of popcorn.

“Yeah, 'cause you wanna drown in something else,” he mumbles to himself.

“What?”

“You heard me. I saw you all over, Jay. Wouldn’t it be better to fuck someone that isn’t friends with your brother?” He laughs while shaking his head.

“Ehh, I was with you, and it didn’t bother me,” you shrug. “Besides, I need to get it from somewhere,” you add in a joking manner, but he doesn’t take it that way.

“Not surprised”

“Excuse me?!” You say, feeling slightly offended you had no idea where this was coming from.

“Don’t act shocked. How the fuck do think that’s supposed to make me feel? When you’re all fucking over him after we just- just fuck it, whatever, I don’t care.”

“Heeseung, you’re drunk,” you replied, brushing his nonsense off.

“And you’re nothing but a fucking slut that can’t go one minute without a dick stuffed inside you before you go fucking running off to someone else” he raises his voice slightly, feeling his agitation grow.

“Shush!” You whisper. “What is it to you? You said it wasn’t worth it anymore. What do you think? I’m just gonna stop having sex because we’re not doing it anymore?” You say, confused.

“Cause I didn’t want to fucking get caught. I didn’t know you’d go out searching the very next day. We broke it off,” he sighs.

“What am I supposed to do? You’re obviously not an option anymore,” you say, getting defensive.

“I don’t know, maybe try a little harder to make something work between us,” he lowers his voice, picking at the label on the liquor bottle.

“Something like what? this was just casual sex”

“Casual?” He laughs softly.

“Yes, that’s what we agreed on,” you remind him.

“So all this time we’ve been screwing, you still just feel it's casual?”

“Yes, and so do you, 'cause you even said I wasn’t worth it,” you replied.

“Well, I fucking take it back, okay, I like you. It was never casual for me, and it’s only been a few days, but I fucking miss you already, and to see how quickly you moved on makes me upset, especially cause it’s right in front of me.”

“So why did you say it?” You ask.

“Cause I didn’t want to get hurt. I knew we couldn’t be public, and I thought maybe just ending things would lighten the blow, but it made it worse cause to see you all over Jay made me feel like shit hence why,” he holds up the bottle of liquor.

“Hee, I feel the same way, too, but when you said it wasn’t worth it anymore, I didn’t think you really cared about us that much, and Jay, I don’t even know. I think I was just trying to take my mind off of you, but I want you and you only.”

“Yeah?” He stands up walking over to you and resting his hands on your hips. “You really mean that?” He cups your cheeks his left hand caressing your face gently.

“Yes, I’m sorry I didn’t say something sooner,” you breathe out, getting lost in his eyes.

“Me too, but I understand, sweetheart. It was complicated, and I’m sorry for what I said earlier and for raising my voice and for cursing,” he rambles, and you laugh softly, wrapping your arms around him.

“I know I forgive you, hee.” You kissed the tip of his nose.

“Thank you, baby,” he smiles, pulling you into his arms. “I know it’s still complicated, but I’m gonna try my best to navigate through this with you. I don’t know what telling Jake will mean for us, but I think we should.”

“I’m scared,” you mumbled into his chest, fearing the disappointment your brother might feel if he found out about you and heeseung.

“Me too,” he chuckled. “But I know no matter the outcome, I want to be with you always.”

Leaning back, you looked up at him. “You mean that?”

“I do.” he smiles down at you, kissing your forehead and swaying you in his arms.

Only time would tell what the outcome would be of telling your brother you’ve been seeing his best friend, but you found comfort in knowing that heeseung would be there for you always.

-

Link to all my other works

[barrenclan]

i feel a bit bad for cormorant :( im sure this isnt your intent but it almost feels as though hes settled for a life he didnt want

I'm curious what this is in response to - there's two major things I can think of, so let me explore them for a second!

So, if this is in response to the idea that Cormorantleaf wants kittens and Pinewing doesn't; lemme talk about that for a second. I tried to go into it in the last epilogue, but with their late-stage relationship I wanted to address a trope in fiction that really bothers me, especially as someone who doesn't want to have children. Stop me if you've heard it before:

Characters A and B are in a romantic relationship. Character A wants to have kids, but B doesn't, for whatever reason. They struggle, and talk about it, and eventually A says "it's okay, even if we don't have kids, I'll still love you!" It's really nice, and confirms that they love each other even if they don't want. Except, then, B turns around and says "it's so good to know that! It made me change my mind; I got over my 'fears', and now I do want kids!"

That bugs me. It's always the assumption, even if it's established that a relationship would be okay without kids, it's always on the onus of the person who doesn't want children to change their mind. It's never enough to stop at "it's okay if we don't have kids together" - and then they don't. So that's what I wanted to do with Cormorantleaf and Pinewing's relationship, and it's why I had Pinewing talk about his discomfort surrounding children so often and Cormorantleaf's potential to be a father. If Corm wanted kids more than he wanted to be with Pine - he could leave! No stopping him. But Pinewing matters more to him than having kids does. I find it more distasteful that someone would force themselves to raise children if they didn't want to (it's almost like that's a theme of the story... and kind of exactly what happened with Nightberry). Admittedly, I would've liked to rather do that idea with Daffodilcloud and Duncan instead of the main gay couple, but eh, I already had an end-of-arc theme with Daff to wrap up that would've clashed. These are the decisions you make when writing a story.

On the other hand, if this is in response to the idea that they're traveling around instead of settling down in one place, or that Pinewing is forcing him into the relationship; maybe I was a bit too subtle with what I was trying to get across. Cormorantleaf was actually the first one to suggest that they travel around together, way back in Issue 26:

Corm needs an emotional anchor more than a physical anchor. And this was especially clear in his early development, and how his relationship to Pinepaw was a bit unhealthy (and vice versa, too); he had such intense abandonment issues that he was holding Pinepaw up as a total pillar of support, and believed he wouldn't be able to survive without him.

That's why I wanted Cormorantleaf to have a chance to be on his own during the breakup, and solidfy that he could exist without a relationship, that he didn't need another person to survive. But instead that he could willingly choose a relationship with Pinewing, because it was something he wanted and something he thought would enrich his life rather than an obligation.

All that to say that Comorantleaf's hesitation in the last epilogue is not meant to be presented as "he's being forced into something he doesn't want by Pinewing", but rather "he's scared that them traveling around will cause Pinewing to abandon him, and that makes him panic and lash out".

And Pinewing would have absolutely stayed with him even after Cormorantleaf yelled at him, except that Corm happened to hit on Pinewing's own insecurities that come from his childhood of neglect and feelings that nobody actually wants him around:

You don't have to be un-anonymous to respond to this, and anyways if it's just personal feelings that's perfectly valid and not something I want to try and change. But I never meant to make it seem like Cormorantleaf wasn't happy with where he ended up, or that he 'settled' for something he didn't want.

[yandere-sins]

Yandere!Mydei caring for a depressed darling

a/n: Tried to do something new with the type of headers I do. Not quite yet close to the aesthetic girlies but I don't hate it! Anyway, I'm now a diagnosed ✨depressed✨ and life's been up and down lately, so I wanted to write for my current comfort character ♥

Characters: Yandere!Mydei(mos) x GN!Reader Warnings: Yandere, Possessiveness, Obsessiveness, Kidnapping, Depression

❥ Mydei likes to return to you doing something. He likes to find you taking a bath (scrambling to get some clothes on when you hear the door unlock) or reading a book (sighing because your reading time is effectively over), stuffing your mouth like an adorable little animal with food, or even wreak havoc if you must (and he gets to put you back in your place). It excites him. It makes taking a rest so much more enjoyable, and he needs to see you thrive in this environment he created for you. Knowing that it's his place that you live in satisfies the homesickness he suppresses, as he can live vicariously through you. Coming home to you asleep—or at least trying to—isn't quite what he has in mind for a greeting.

❥ He's not too pleased to have to wake you up or make you at least acknowledge his presence. But he will, of course, do so however his mood commands him to. Sometimes, he grabs the blanket so you end up rolling out of bed; other times, he spoons you from behind, applying more and more pressure to your body until you react. Or he calls out to you and pokes you until you're finally up. Just this time, everything he does seems to affect you less. Like you don't care. Like you can't care.

❥ When you do finally get up, he immediately notices the changes in you. He can't pinpoint what exactly is wrong. Still, everything from your sluggish demeanor to the faded light in your eyes gives him clues to an unsolvable puzzle. He doesn't like it. Mydei asks you what's going on with you, his repeated questioning getting annoying fast, but your shrugging your shoulders and being dismissive isn't cutting it for him. He will test for a fever and belittle you for not taking care of yourself as you should as he tries to find any wounds that could cause you distress. Clearly, you've been up to no good and probably worn yourself out. Mydei is so obsessed with finding the cause that he can't see the forest for the trees.

❥ Frustrated and angry at you since he doesn't know what is going on with you (this could just be another one of your ways to challenge him), he storms off to take care of his own needs for a little while but eventually does return with your favorite food. Even though Mydei has to get you out of bed again—which he does unapologetically and ruthlessly by picking you up regardless of your state of awareness—he forces you to have a meal with him. He gets even more upset when you barely touch your food. He keeps piling more items on your plate, but you just sit back after a few nibbles, unwilling to consume more. It's grating his nerves, but even more so, it raises a sense of discomfort in him that he never felt with you before. Even when he had to fight you, wrestle you to the ground, and force you to obey his whims, he never felt like this... somewhat... helpless. It's uncomfortable and distressing, and Mydei doesn't want to think of the memories these feelings remind him of.

❥ You, not objecting to being placed on top of him like a weighted blanket for the night, is the final nail in the coffin. You hate it with a passion when he picks you up and moves you like a doll, especially if it initiates more body contact than you feel like having with him or being placed in an awkward position. But you don't even tell him to stop or push your hands into his chest, giving him a reason to wrestle with you for a bit. Instead, your behavior keeps Mydei up all night after he pulled a blanket over you two, and you actually have the audacity to fall asleep on his chest without any complaints, not knowing the agony he's going through. But fine! You want to not interact with him? Well, that gives Mydei the opportunity to do whatever he wants with you.

❥ So, in the morning (later than he usually gets up), he forces you to bathe with him. You do tense up and try to get away from him, but he won't let you. Having your hair washed by Mydei is not a gentle undertaking, as he scrubs the soap against your scalp seemingly without an ounce of care. However, when some tears fall, he at least makes an effort to be more careful with the rest of your body. You'll be surprised to witness how he is still able to learn from his mistakes despite forcing you into this relationship with him. But even if it isn't how he's used to doing things, he tries—for you. The same goes for brushing your teeth (he'll use his tools for you unless you do it yourself), combing your hair (washing was enough torture, although he's reaching for the comb almost too quickly for you to decide if you can manage it yourself or not), and putting fresh clothes on (which takes a lot of time as he ponders what you should wear that day).

❥ Mydei's special care doesn't stop there as you are getting carried or dragged around all day by him—no matter where, except for the place you had been forced to call your "home". Into meetings with the other Chrysos Heirs (which everyone is very surprised by since Mydei never allows them to visit you and keeps you all to himself usually), onto the training grounds (where he was nice enough to bring your book along in case you were bored, but he ended up checking up so much on you that his training was cut short), and to restaurants three times that day, so he could make sure you were eating right. You've never actually got to hang out so much with him outside his place, and he had never shown any interest in you learning about his daily routine, either. So, although you can't appreciate the change as much in your current state, you do enjoy being outside and doing something (even if it isn't what you want to do).

❥ Even though he kept his eyes on you all day, your lack of trying to complain to someone about Mydei's treatment concerns him. Usually, you'd try to tell everyone your tale of being forced into a relationship with him the few times he took you outside, always causing a scene with him in the streets. But you seem to lack the energy for it. For anything, really. You're still barely eating and even allow him to reach for and take your hand at any given moment, which he enjoys but is only half as rewarding as when he has to fight for the right. You even stopped struggling whenever he picked you up, instead slumping over and resting in his hold. And you sigh a lot, reaching up sometimes to wipe away tears that threaten to fall. If he wasn't concerned the day before, he definitely is now.

❥ It can't be helped, Mydei doesn't know what to do. So, despite grumbling about how he can't believe all this, he takes you to a spot no one can see you two in. Somewhere, the sun will shine down on you despite it being evening, and he sets you down between his legs, leaning you against his chest before resting back against a wall, too, soaking in the sunlight. It doesn't take too long until the silence gets to you, emotions swelling inside you until they burst out in tiny sniffles. By the time you are turned into a sobbing mess, Mydei is hugging you tightly against his chest, letting your tears run down his skin. He's neither hushing nor reprimanding you, rubbing your back calmly instead and letting you cling to him even if your nails dig into his flesh. The part that suppresses all of the uncomfortable feelings inside of him locking them away and burying them deeper every time they act up, doesn't understand what is happening. Mydei put them away to keep himself clear-headed and fighting at all times. But the other part—the one ruled by his heart that loves you so very much—feels for you, wishing he could just take care of whoever and whatever made you feel this way. He longs to have your feisty, adorable self back and wishes he could prove to you how capable he is in protecting you. Still, instinctively, he knows that it wouldn't be this easy.

❥ Mydei is not admitting to being part of the problem. He's not allowing anyone, not even you, to tell him that. But he will be the one to help you fix whatever issue you're having. You will follow his routine, and he will adjust it so you think of anything other than the thoughts in your head that torment you. If he can provide you with a new experience, he will. If buying you a hundred new books, he will. Ice cream for breakfast? Just say the words. He'll stay behind from some missions, no matter how hard he itches for the fights, just so you aren't as lonely. He'll do anything—anything—so he doesn't have to come back to find you this way again. So that he doesn't encounter this condition that he doesn't know how to fix. A condition no one taught him how to take care of and which he doesn't acknowledge in himself.

❥ Despite not getting any softer than this, Mydei does show you a tremendous amount of care the next few days. He drags you to many more outings, but there are also a lot of planned rests in between. You get to meet the others, and sometimes, he sees your smile return, however short-lived it is. Mydei goes out of his way to make you happy, never saying it out loud but showing through actions that he cares. He lets you roam the market by his side or even allows you to hold a weapon once or twice (under his strict supervision) when you show interest in it. He does stop you the few times you try to tell someone what is going on because losing you isn't an option, even if you seem to think it is. There is no way he'd ever let you go... but he does want you to feel better again. Having you wither away had never been the plan, although he reflects that sometimes it could have looked that way to you. He's not going to change his ways in the future, but he will provide you with what you need as long as he can give it to you.

❥ But the first time you get upset at him again, his heart makes a massive leap in his chest, trying to burst out. Mydei wants to rip it out from beneath his rips so he can throw the stupid thing at you, hoping you'll finally realize how bad his feelings are for you. Just having a glimpse of the you, he loves, back is enough to satisfy the ache that had risen over the time he had to watch you live in your depressive state. And sometimes, when you two fight, he even lets you win now. Mydei can spare a night not smothering you beneath him as he falls asleep spread on top of you. Letting you push him off and wearing the very temporary bruises like marks of endearment on his skin. His love becomes increasingly undiluted, especially when you show him the fire returning to your eyes. Your tongue, too, tastes better once it's sharp again and he has a reason to shut you up. Even though he carried you around for a while, seeing your body move around on its own is like a mesmerizing dance that he watches with rapture, and it raises his appetite for you like never before.

And you will never know how much effort he puts into keeping it this way for the rest of your time together.

[cruel-seduction]

Beyond Fears 

Summary - With the biggest exam of your life coming up, stress is eating you alive—but Mattheo refuses to let it win. He’ll do whatever it takes to pull you out of your own head, even if it means causing a little chaos. But when the truth behind your fear comes out, he’s ready to remind you of one thing—no matter what happens, he’s not going anywhere.

Content Warning - Suggestive theme and Curse words. 

Glimpse - “And as for your stupid little fear that I’ll find someone else—ugh, babe, do you think I’m insane? That my brain is rotting?” His lips twitched into a smirk before softening again. “Do you think I’d willingly trade you—the love of my fucking life, the only person who actually laughs at my dumb jokes, the only one who knows exactly how I like my coffee, the only soul on this godforsaken planet who makes me feel like I belong—for anyone else?” His voice was raw now, honest in a way that made your chest ache.

His forehead pressed against yours, his nose brushing yours as he whispered, “Baby, there is no one else. There never will be.”

a/n - Credit goes to @bernardsbendystraws. And also I wrote this based of on a scene from my fav show. Cause I needed to do crying reader over valid reason and this seem like best. And she does portrays that she is strong. but Mattheo is Mattheo bro.

Requested by @jarjarbinks-har-har

Mattheo could feel the tension rolling off you from a mile away—thick, restless, electric. Anxiety coiled around your frame like an iron grip, tightening with every breath you took. The upcoming exam loomed over you like a storm cloud, its weight pressing down on you with an unbearable force. If you passed, you’d be the youngest woman in history to earn a seat at one of the most prestigious higher education institutions for witches and wizards. The pressure was suffocating, an invisible noose tightening around your throat.

You weren’t the only one feeling it. Mattheo was tense too, but not because of the exam. No, he was wound up because of you—because your stress became his stress, your suffering bled into him like an open wound. He’d tried everything to ease your nerves. He took you to your favorite coffee shop, bought you anything you wanted, even tried distracting you with jokes and stolen kisses—but nothing worked. You were drowning in books, lost in your relentless pursuit of perfection, and no amount of comfort could pull you out.

Eighteen hours. That’s how long you had gone without sleep. Maybe more. You were running purely on caffeine and raw determination, your veins practically humming with exhaustion. Dark circles didn’t just shadow your eyes—they owned your face, carved into your skin like permanent bruises. At night, you sang old traditional songs in a hollow, eerie voice, studying by torchlight like some deranged scholar possessed by ancient magic. Your roommates had given up on you, groaning in frustration as your muttered revisions carried into the early hours. Even when Mattheo convinced you to crash in his dorm, you never truly rested. You just laid there beside him, whispering formulas, theories, and incantations under your breath, your fingers tracing invisible notes on his skin. It was getting out of hand.

Mattheo watched you now, his jaw clenched as he took in the sight before him—you, hunched over a book in the Great Hall, a cup of coffee gripped in one trembling hand, barely picking at your food with the other. Students all around were suffering through exam stress, but Mattheo didn’t give a damn about any of them. You were the only one who mattered. And watching you unravel like this was killing him.

Sitting beside him, Theodore Nott let out a low whistle. “Mate, what the hell is wrong with her?” he muttered, following Mattheo’s gaze.

Mattheo exhaled sharply, shaking his head. “That stupid exam is next week. She’s pushing herself too hard. If she doesn’t pass, she won’t be able to retake it for another four years. That would completely screw up her entire life plan.” His voice was tight, frustration laced beneath the concern.

Theodore huffed a laugh, lips curling in amusement. “Please, it can’t be that serious. No one plans their life around one exam.” Mattheo’s eyes darkened as he turned toward his friend. “It’s her wallpaper.” Theodore’s brow furrowed. “What?”

Mattheo ran a hand through his hair. “The life plan. It hangs over her bed.” Theodore’s mouth formed a small ‘O’ of realization, his amusement fading into something more thoughtful.

Mattheo knew this couldn’t go on. He couldn’t just sit back and watch you self-destruct. No, he had to do something.

And he knew exactly what to do.

Later that day, Mattheo found you exactly where he expected—in the library, buried under an avalanche of books, your fingers gripping a quill like it was the only thing keeping you tethered to reality. Without a word, he sank into the chair beside you, drumming his fingers against the wooden surface.

You didn’t even glance up, just exhaled a frustrated sigh before whispering, “Don’t waste my time. Just say what you wanna say.”

Mattheo smirked, leaning back in his chair with that signature arrogance, the kind that both infuriated and charmed you in equal measure. “Babe, don’t worry. You’re gonna crush it. You could take this exam with one eye closed and still beat half these idiots. And most importantly—” he paused, his voice softening slightly, “—even if you don’t, it’s fine. You got this.”

Your eyes snapped to his, narrowing. “You don’t know what you’re saying,” you scoffed. “You’re only saying this because you love me. Love has made you dumber.”

Mattheo let out a low chuckle, shaking his head. “No, I don’t think so. If anything, love has made me smarter. See, I haven’t picked a single fight this whole month.”

Your lips twitched despite yourself, a ghost of a proud smile appearing. “Yes, I am very proud of you for that. But if you don’t get the hell out in ten seconds, I will personally break your nose.”

Mattheo grinned like he’d been waiting for exactly that response. In a single, swift motion, he grabbed your wrist, yanking you to your feet before you could protest.

“What the hell, Mattheo?!” You struggled against his grip, your chair scraping noisily against the floor as he dragged you out of the library. Heads turned. You scowled. “Stop! I swear to Merlin, if this is another one of your—”

He didn’t stop. He didn’t even slow down, only coming to a halt when he shoved open the door to an abandoned classroom and pulled you inside.

You shot him a glare as you yanked your arm free. “This better be good, Riddle, or I’m hexing your balls into oblivion.”

Mattheo’s smirk widened as he leaned casually against a desk, arms crossed over his chest. “Since you’re so stressed, I figured—why not give you a test?”

Your eyes darkened, your irritation sharpening into a glare. “Are you serious? You dragged me here for a fake test? These things are useless, Mattheo. They don’t have the same pressure, the same distractions. It’s all too damn quiet and perfect, like the walls themselves are whispering the answers.”

Mattheo tilted his head, looking entirely too pleased with himself. “Yeah, I figured you’d say that.” He clapped his hands together once, and suddenly, the door swung open.

In walked Abby and Scully from Ravenclaw, each lugging twenty-five bags of chips. As they sat down, they immediately started munching—loudly. Crunching, smacking, licking their fingers like they were trying to break a world record for obnoxious eating.

Your eye twitched.

But that wasn’t all. Right behind them, a group of students filed in—loud ones. The kind who couldn’t stay quiet if their lives depended on it. They bickered, they whispered, they tapped their quills against the desks, they fidgeted like caffeinated squirrels.

Mattheo leaned in, his lips brushing the shell of your ear as he whispered, “Better prepare yourself, Y/L/N. This is your battlefield.” Then, with a wicked grin, he added, “And I know you wanna rip my clothes off right now, but you’re gonna have to wait and ace this test first.”

You stepped closer, so close that he sucked in a breath, his smirk faltering just slightly. Your voice dropped to a sultry whisper, just for him.

“I am so fucking turned on by you right now.” You smirked. “Give me five minutes to destroy this test. Then? You.”

Mattheo’s mouth fell open slightly, like he’d just been hit by a Confundus Charm.

You winked, snatching up the test from his hands, and took your seat, utterly unbothered by the chaos around you.

Mattheo, still standing there, watching you with something dark and heated in his gaze, let out a quiet, disbelieving chuckle.

“Fucking hell,” he muttered. “I think I just made studying sexy.”

Mattheo sat outside on the Quidditch field, staring up at the darkening sky, the cool breeze doing nothing to temper the frustration simmering in his chest. His fingers fidgeted with a stray blade of grass as he replayed the events of the day over and over in his head. He was about to go find you himself when he noticed Abby and Scully trudging toward him, looking particularly sheepish.

“We’re out of chips,” they said in perfect unison.

Mattheo blinked. Then scowled. “What the hell? I gave you fifty packets. And I told you to stay in that damn room.”

Scully shifted uncomfortably before muttering, “About that… Y/N kinda… vanished.”

Mattheo’s stomach dropped. His jaw clenched. “Vanished?” His voice was eerily calm, but his eyes—oh, his eyes had darkened into something deadly.

Abby nodded. “Yeah, she just—poof. One second she was there, the next, gone. No idea where.”

Mattheo shot to his feet, his entire body thrumming with tension. “I asked you to do one thing,” he snapped, running a frustrated hand through his hair. “One fucking thing—and you couldn’t even do that?” He exhaled sharply, shaking his head. “Move aside.”

It was almost nightfall, and Mattheo, along with his friends, had been searching for you for over an hour. You were nowhere to be found. His mind churned with possibilities—were you upset? Were you hiding? Had something happened? And then, like a punch to the gut, it hit him.

Today’s date.

Mattheo stopped in his tracks, exhaling as realization settled over him. “I know where she is,” he muttered. “Go back to the dorms—I got this.”

Without waiting for a response, he turned on his heel and headed toward the Potions classroom.

And there you were.

Curled up in a ball, tucked into the shadows, your arms wrapped around your knees as if holding yourself together. The dim candlelight flickered against your face, casting soft, golden hues over your tear-streaked cheeks. His chest tightened at the sight.

Mattheo said nothing as he stepped inside. He didn’t need to. Instead, he lowered himself to the floor beside you, his presence warm and steady.

You glanced up, your voice barely above a whisper. “How did you find me?”

His expression remained neutral, but his eyes—his eyes—were soft as they met yours. “15th of March.”

A humorless laugh escaped your lips, and despite yourself, a small, sad smile tugged at the corner of your mouth. “Of course.”

Mattheo’s lips curled into one of those rare smiles—the kind he didn’t give just anyone. “A year ago, today, we had detention together.” His tone turned teasing. “You spent the whole night pretending to be annoyed while secretly staring at me like I was the hottest thing you’d ever seen, and by the end of it, you were completely infatuated with me.”

You gave him a side-eye. “Mattheo.”

He rolled his eyes. “Fine. You flirted with me for fifteen seconds, and I became obsessed.”

You let out a soft chuckle, shaking your head. “Sounds more accurate.”

A comfortable silence settled between you both.

And then, softly, Mattheo asked, “Babe, can you tell me the real reason why you’re scared?”

You hesitated for a moment before shifting closer, resting your head against his shoulder. His warmth seeped into you, grounding you, anchoring you.

“I didn’t even know why I was so tense before,” you admitted. “But when I was in that classroom, giving that practice test… I realized.” Your throat tightened. “Passing this test means going away from you. And I—I don’t know how to handle that.”

Mattheo stayed quiet, letting you speak.

“All these days, I’ve been drowning myself in books, trying to avoid thinking about it. But in that classroom, it hit me.” Your voice cracked. “Everything between us is so good right now. But what if leaving ruins that? What if we can’t make long distance work? What if me being gone changes everything?” A tear slid down your cheek, soaking into Mattheo’s shirt. “And what if—” your voice broke entirely, and you inhaled shakily, “—what if you realize that you deserve better? What if you find someone else, someone closer? Someone who isn’t a whole country away?”

Mattheo was quiet for a beat. Then, with a slow exhale, he shook his head and lifted his hands to your face, cradling your cheeks between his palms. He wiped your tears away gently, then—because he was still Mattheo—he wiped his hands off on your shirt, making you let out a watery laugh.

And then, in a voice barely above a whisper, he said, “Babe, listen to me—no, actually, shut up and listen, because I know that pretty little overthinking brain of yours is already running marathons.” His thumbs stroked your cheekbones, his touch featherlight. His gaze—intense, unwavering, filled with nothing but love—held you in place, made you feel every word before he even said them.

“Darling, if you don’t go—if you give up your dream for me—I swear I will throw myself into the nearest trash can and live there forever because that’s exactly where I belong if I let you do that.” His voice was steady, firm, convincing. “Baby, I want you to go. I need you to go. Not because I want to be away from you—hell no, I’m already dreading the distance—but because you’ve been dreaming about this since you were a kid, and the only thing worse than missing you would be watching you resent me for holding you back.”

You sniffled, lips trembling.

“And as for your stupid little fear that I’ll find someone else—ugh, babe, do you think I’m insane? That my brain is rotting?” His lips twitched into a smirk before softening again. “Do you think I’d willingly trade you—the love of my fucking life, the only person who actually laughs at my dumb jokes, the only one who knows exactly how I like my coffee, the only soul on this godforsaken planet who makes me feel like I belong—for anyone else?” His voice was raw now, honest in a way that made your chest ache.

His forehead pressed against yours, his nose brushing yours as he whispered, “Baby, there is no one else. There never will be.”

Tears slipped silently down your cheeks.

“So go. Conquer. Be brilliant.” He swallowed thickly. “And when you come back, I’ll be right here, still stupidly in love with you, probably crying into your hoodie and talking to your pictures like a lunatic.” He gave you a small, wry smile. “But I’ll be yours. Always.”

Your lips trembled. Your fingers clutched at the fabric of his shirt.

And then, with no warning, you surged forward, crashing your lips against his in a kiss so deep, so desperate, it stole the breath from both your lungs.

Mattheo exhaled into your mouth, his arms winding around you like he never wanted to let go.

And maybe, just maybe—he never would.

[doppel-doodles]

A normal post a about Kevin Barnes from Poppy Playtime.

I genuinely feel so bad for Kevin…

Like that was a kid who clearly had a lot of issues from the start, instead of getting the help he needed all that happened was him being marked off as a „problem child“.

And then he was turned into a toy:/

Read more of my full thoughts and a sorta character analysis/ramblings below cut!

Like honestly no wonder he is seething if he wasn’t troubled before he definitely is now-

Obviously he has no trust in anyone, almost every adult he ever knew screwed him over in some way, hell even the kids he shares a body with would go against what he would do.

(Great example: When Doey chases us in his monster form, it's the arms of Matthew and Jack that are trying to keep his mouth from biting us, Kevin's are trying to grab for us.)

He was hurt over and over again, clearly he wasn’t aggressive just because he wanted to be but because this was his only way of making sure he wouldn’t get hurt.

It was how he had a semblance of control, a sense of protection.

But of course the irony is: That coping mechanism brought him more pain, it was what got him killed.

Sure, maybe he could've just "calmed down", but why would he? He was hurt again, he lost everything AGAIN.

All because he listened to their judgement over his own. Kevin could've killed the player and Poppy on sight, clearly his emotions easily overpowered the other two, but he didn't.

Instead he agreed to trust them as well.

He was still willing to do that, surely if he were just a mindless monster he wouldn't be.

And you know what? I believe he blames himself just as much if not more for what happened than he blames us and Poppy and projects it tenfold.

Because maybe, JUST MAYBE-

If he didn't allow himself to trust again, then everyone would still be alive.

But he did...now see what that got him?

In his mind he's proven right.

So what's an emotionally unstable child to do? After being hurt AGAIN?

That's right.

He lashes out at the first thing he sees that had something to do with his pain:

Us.

Is he in the right? Hell nah- bro we didn't mean for that to happen! But do you seriously think this kid is thinking rationally right now??? NO! He is seeing red right now, he is in fight mode! All emotions and must I reiterate that the only way he knows how to express them is through anger and violence?

There is NO reasoning with wrath try as you might! And that hurts because yeah maybe you could've dealt with that if he was still a gradeschooler but he isn't! He is 900 pounds of living dough with a thirst for blood!

It's either our life or his now. And we already know what the outcome of that is.

Honestly I think it's better that we only hear Matthew and Jack apologise for what happened, I do not think Kevin would even if he did feel bad for what he had done.

Because why would someone who has been scorned so many times be vulnerable all of the sudden? When his main character trait is biting at those who bark at him?Why would all that rage suddenly disappear? If anything the stress of dying only causes him to lash out more.

You don't need an apology from him to feel bad for him.

He is hurting anyone with two eyes can see that and for what it's worth, I do believe deep down he knew what he was doing was wrong but it was too late for him to see any other alternatives and even if he didn't and thought he was right for doing what he did it doesn't take away from the fact that he was fucked over by life.

Kevin is not the worst part of Doey, he is just a part of him.

And that part is not just a violent hunk of playdough.

It’s a scared, confused little boy that cared just as much about every toy in safe haven as his other two components did.

Because if he didn’t why would he get so angry about their death?

Anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk-

Also feel free to agree or disagree with my take, those are just my thoughts so let me hear yours, I like discussions:}

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | February 3rd-9th 2025

Less than a month until 9-1-1 is back on our screens babyyyyy! how's everyone doing after that kiss hug in the rain scene???

Complete

You And I Walk A Fragile Line (I Have Known It All This Time) by pinkpeachtea (Hug In The Rain Spec | 1,3K | Teen): "Eddie?" Buck asked, voice breaking on the name as he noticed the car door opening again, staying open– probably getting the entire interior wet. And it was hard to see- especially through the rain- but if Buck wasn't just hallucinating, it'd actually look like… He was walking right towards him. Careful at first, slowly, until his steps got quicker– jogging that turned into running. Buck could feel his feet again, though he had no control over them as he found himself walking towards Eddie, meeting him not quite halfway when he came to a halt and– "Why did you stop?"

lull of you by brewrosemilk/ @gayhoediaz (Getting Together | 1,7K | Teen): For as long as Buck can remember, Eddie’s ability to express himself has left him in awe—the way that, although it sometimes takes a minute for him to get there, whenever he’s ready, he’ll rip his heart out of his own chest and present it on a silver platter. With a thumb pressed to Buck’s pulse point—or both—and deep, warm, earnest eyes. Buck has never been like that—he goes all out before he’s even sure what he feels; he’s dramatic and emotional, and clingy, and his emotions often run his actions miles ahead of his brain. (Not that he hasn’t come to terms with that by now—he is who he is, and he’s learned to appreciate it.) The interesting thing is, though—despite his regular habit of rushing things to beat his tendency to overthink in a lap around the racetrack—for once, tonight, his brain feels… quiet. Calm.

& such by colonoscopys/ @colonoscopys (87K | Teen): prompts and spec fics and codas and all the works jumbled mumbled into one place.

22. reunions (Eddie back from Texas | 2K): Buck kind of—avoids Eddie when he gets back.  He knows he shouldn’t. The thing is, his heart still feels so bruised. It still feels like it’s lying there on the road, soaking up the gravel and the cement and the area just under Eddie’s tires, and he’s—tired. He’s tired. He just wants a second, to recuperate, before he goes back out there and pretends like everything is okay. 

No Take Backs by Maximoff_Wanda (Friends to Fiances | 2K | Not Rated): “Marry me,” he blurted out, causing the other man to freeze and turn to stare at him. “What?” Eddie slowly lowered himself down on one knee, keeping eye contact with Buck, his blue eyes widening as he watched Eddie sink to the ground. Somewhere in the background, he hears a woman squealing as she notices what’s happening. Eddie clears his throat, grabbing one of Buck’s hands as a crowd starts to form around them. “Buck... Evan. There is nothing more that I want than to spend the rest of my life getting pretzels with you at the zoo listening to your endless fun animal facts while you buy our son sugary confections that he doesn’t need just because it makes him happy... So will you please marry me?”

When I see you again by Maximoff_Wanda (Hug In The Rain Spec | 2K | General): Buck sighed as the sky opened up and a drizzle of rain began to pour over them as they walked out of the Diaz house toward Eddie’s truck. Of course, it had to rain the day the love of his life left for Texas. Now that he’s thinking about it, Buck realized it was always raining when Buck and Eddie lose each other.

i knew it when you looked my way (that i'd be begging you to stay) by teaspoonmoon/ @young-waverer (Hug In The Rain Spec | 2K | General): When Eddie pulls Buck in, Buck melts, wrapping one arm over his shoulder and the other under his arm, palms wide to cling to as much of Eddie as he can hold. Buck’s chin settles in the crook of Eddie’s neck and he breathes in deeply, trying to commit to memory the blurred together scent of Eddie’s deodorant and shampoo and the petrichor hanging in the air. “I miss you already,” Eddie says into Buck’s ear, stubble scraping against Buck’s cheek as his mouth moves. With one last squeeze Eddie pulls away, clapping Buck just a little too hard on the shoulder. “I should probably get on the road,” Eddie says, stepping away. “Drive safe,” Buck replies, stepping after him. Eddie slides into the driver’s seat and shuts the door, drops the bag of scones into the seat next to him. He resolutely doesn’t look into the rearview mirror as he adjusts it.

But What A Ghostly Scene by icewhisper (S4, Coma Dream | 3K | Teen): Eddie had always thought if he came close to death, it’d be Shannon or his abuelo he saw who pushed him to go home – to go back to Christopher – but when a sniper nearly killed him, it was a little boy he dreamed of instead. Nearly two years later, he realizes who that little boy was.

with a little water and a little bit of sunlight by teaspoonmoon/ @young-waverer (S8E8: Wannabes | 4K | Teen): “You flipped the tablet.” “Did I?” Lord only knows how he carried out an emotional affair as long as he did if this is how good he is at lying. Buck clearly has come to some—wrong—conclusion, given the way he smirks and cocks his head. “What're you looking at, Eddie?” His tone is a little flirty, a little suggestive, and if Eddie were any less close to a panic attack he'd probably think the gulf between what Buck assumes he'd been doing and what he was actually looking at was very funny. — The one where it's not Homes.com but it's also not porn on the iPad.

let's go get the shit kicked out of us by love by teaspoonmoon/ @young-waverer (Post-S8E8: Wannabes, Getting Together | 4K | Teen): “Are you Love Actuallying me?” Eddie looks about as surprised that those are the words coming out of his mouth as Buck is to hear them. “Oh my god, what?” “Love Actually. That freaky kid who’s like thirty now but still looks like a ten year old. Runs through an airport, gets himself put on a no-fly list for love? Are you Love Actuallying me?” “For fuck’s sake, has everyone seen that movie but me?” Buck has to laugh, it’s absurd. This whole thing is absurd. He wants to rip his hair out. He also, as of thirty minutes or maybe six years ago, wants to rip Eddie’s shirt off, but that’s not his main focus at the moment.

Will you still be with me (when the magic’s all run out?) by scarmaddiewrites (Witch Buck AU | 5K | Not Rated): Buck is a witch and in love with Eddie…that really it.

Cupid, Q-Words, and Cursed Shifts by JJK/ @trenchcoatsandtimetravel (Post-S8A, Valentine's Day | 5K | Teen): A slow shift at the firehouse gets derailed when someone accidentally says the Q-word, Eddie pines over Buck, and the new Probie panics about Valentine's Day.

I’ll tell them put me back in it (and I would do it again) by paleredheadinascifi (Getting Together | 5K | Teen): Eddiaz is listening to the slowburn friends to lovers playlist. Eddiaz listened to the POV you’re falling in love with your best friend playlist. Eddiaz listened to the sad gay yearning hours playlist. Eddiaz listened to the he was my best friend and that was the worst part playlist. Or, Eddie doesn't know how to make his listening history private. Buck doesn't know what to do with the words in front of his eyes. Chris cannot believe he has to deal with either of them.

Eddie Diaz's Emotional Support Group Chat by scarmaddiewrites (Chat fic, Post-S8E8: Wannabes | 6K | Teen): Eddie makes a group chat to help him with his plan to woo Buck… It goes about as well as you think it would.

promise what you will, something good for me by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Fake Relationship, Getting Together | 6K | Teen): Eddie forms a one-sided beef with a woman claiming to be psychic and ropes Buck into a fake dating scheme to try and prove all her predictions wrong.

your slightest look easily will unclose me by teaspoonmoon/ @young-waverer (S8E6: Confessions, PWP | 7K | Explicit): Eddie takes in a deep breath and reaches out and sets his hand on Buck’s knee, fingers wrapping around his lower thigh, pinky brushing his inseam. “Hey. If you were my first, you’d be my last.” The air is still between them and feels charged in a way it wasn’t a moment ago. Careful not to dislodge Eddie’s hand, Buck stretches his arm out to grab the tequila. Watching Eddie out of the corner of his eye, he knocks back another half shot. Eddie doesn’t retract his hand, and the heat of it is starting to seep through the denim of Buck’s jeans. “Sure.” Buck sounds weary. “That’s easy for you to say, when it’s—when it’s just hypothetical.” “What if…” Eddie’s grip on Buck tightens marginally. “What if it wasn’t a hypothetical?”

We're Overdue for a Revival by BespectacledBunny (Post-S8E8: Wannabes, Chris coming back from Texas, Marriage of Convenience | 60K | Mature): “If I had,” Chris lingers on the words, watching Eddie intently through the screen, “If I had conditions?” Eddie feels his stomach knot up. It’s the first time Chris has ever alluded to a willingness to come home. Usually he just shoots Eddie down with a flat “I know” before hurrying off the call. Eddie Diaz will be damned before he lets this chance slip through his hands. “Anything,” his voice rings with desperation in his own ears, “Whatever you need to feel ready to come home. If I can make it happen, I will.” Chris eyes him, young face serious as a judge presiding over trial. Finally, Chris opens his mouth and says something so earth shattering as to crack the foundations of his father’s mind. “Marry Buck,” Chris says firmly.

WIP

🔥 there is no roadby littleghost/ @ghostlandtoo (Post-S8A, Eddie moves to Texas | 5/6 | 77K | Explicit): Years ago, almost a full decade, Shannon had asked him to move and Eddie refused because he was trying to build a life for himself again. Eddie knows if he asks Buck, he’ll get that same refusal. Worse, Buck could say yes and Eddie would be uprooting Buck from the very life he built for himself. He doesn’t ask, and Buck doesn’t offer, and they pack up Eddie Diaz’s life in Los Angeles into cardboard boxes. Or: Eddie moves to Texas. Buck buys his house. There’s a love story somewhere in here.

🔥 how come everybody's dancing but you?by showedupatyourparty (Post-S7 Spec, Eddie Sexuality Crisis | 4/6 | 45K | Mature): Buck feels guilty. Everyone he loves is going through something painful, difficult, or unexpected right now. And Buck is just…bisexual. It’s great that he’s figured it out, and it’s great that everyone has been so supportive, and Tommy is—Tommy is fine. The sex is good, at least. Consistent. When Buck gets a call from Eddie’s phone late on a Tuesday night in June, it’s cause for concern. * Buck unpacks his own feelings about his recently-discovered bisexuality. Eddie gets adopted by drag queens. They're both just trying their best to be happy.

disappearing into the distance by bucksclipboard/ @endofthedaymp3 (Eddie Comes Back From Texas, Getting Together | 2/4 | 6K | Teen): Eddie wasn’t sure why he and Maddie weren’t close. It was strange, considering her little brother was the most important person in his life. Still, when the door opened, tight hugs were exchanged and cheerful welcome homes rang in his ears. “Does Bobby know? I gotta call Bobby!”, Chimney yelled. “Could you wait a minute?”, Eddie interjected. His eyes darted between them for a moment and landed on Chim, deciding he was his best bet. “Maybe first explain to me why I went to see Buck and his loft was empty. Am I missing something? Did he move?” or: eddie comes back from texas – only to find that buck has left los angeles

🔥 Gentle On My Mind by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, Shannon Lives, Buck/Eddie/Shannon | 13/? | 81K | Explicit): In which Shannon lives, tells a lie, and sends hers, Eddie's, and Buck's lives down a very different path.

🔥 Doe & a Drop of Golden Sun by ohstars/ @oh-stars (Canon Divergent, Dad Buck | 12/? | 54K | Teen): Buck doesn't mean to keep secrets from everyone, but he also can't talk about the pain he experiences on a day to day basis. With his nine-year-old living across the country and his custody limited to one monthly visit, Buck doesn't know how to share this part of himself. How does he tell his team of six years that he's had a kid this whole time? How does he tell his sister? How does he tell his Edd-- best friend? It's fine. The universe isn't going to give him a choice in the matter when the worst thing imaginable becomes his reality.

Podfic

🔥 Cowboy With a One Track Mind by Daisies_and_Briars [Podfic] by Rhea314 (Rhea)/ @rhea314 // fic by @cal-daisies-and-briars (Alternate Universe, Different First Meeting | 2.5h-3h | Mature): Spin-off Sequel to Evan Buckley & the Coma-Verse of Madness - Chapter 7 (Land): Grieving and tortured, Evan Buckley has been living alone in Montana in a remote cabin for nearly a decade. After an incident that leaves him missing six months of his life, and suddenly in connection with a group of strangers from Los Angeles, Evan must decide whether to remain in his self-imposed exile, or take a chance at life again.

🔥 [podfic] braver than you believe (loved more than you know) by be_brave13/ @djemsowhat (S8E6: Confessions Spec | 20-30min | Teen): “There's things,” Eddie chokes out, getting the closest he can in a Catholic church to saying what he means to say, words that he’s never said before unable to make an appearance even now. “There's… people… feelings that I— I want to experience differently than I have before, or maybe even for the first time.” “Something… different than what you had with Anna and Marisol?” The priest hedges. “Something, even, different than what you and your wife had?” The words feel insinuating, but the tone stays light and unchallenging. The priest in Eddie’s mind has big hands and curious, soulful eyes and a chunky watch on his wrist, like he could be anyone. A blond man at a bar that Eddie’s eyes keep coming back to, for no reason at all. “Yeah,” Eddie confesses. “Yeah, I’m just starting to think that… maybe there’s more to it all than I thought. Maybe, I can ask for what I thought wasn’t allowed. And I can choose what I want instead of what everyone else thinks I should have.”

🔥[Podfic] Promising Light by cottagepodfics @cottagepodfics / fic by @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S8E8: Wannabes, Time Travel | 2-2.5h | Mature): Buck and Eddie fall asleep drunk and in separate rooms after the night of Buck and Tommy's breakup. They wake up seven years later, in an unfamiliar future, only to find out that they're married.

[zepskies]

Omg Michelle, this is so original! I've never read a canon Dean biking before, but I have a feeling it's about to be very fun. I LOVE me a S15 fix-it fic. 😏

“Hi.” Okay…what were the odds some crazed person knew sign language?

Ooh headcanon that Eileen taught him some sign language! Also I see you with the "Ramblin' Man" song choice. 😜

But eventually you were coming up on a town and the roads were about to get busier. He made a quick gesture with his hand before taking off ahead of you, getting in front of you in your lane and disappearing down the road. “Boys,” you mumbled, trying not to think of the last thing he’d signed. “I had fun, sweetheart. Let’s do it again sometime.”

LOLL oh Dean. I love that, "Boys." 😂

“Darn it,” he said, feigning a sigh. “Here I thought I made an impression. Did I not do enough wheelies?” Then he signed, “Sweetheart,” with his hand, flashing you a wink.

Damn him and his Dean charm. lmfao

“How about a ride on it?” You blinked.  “A ride on your…” you swallowed, the man chuckling. “My bike. Although you are more than welcome to ride anything of mine you like,” he said.

MICHELLE. The way I legit laughed out loud, startling the dog!! 💀

Dean pls, you can't convince me that you didn't mean the other thing. 😂😂😂

“My sister in law is deaf. I actually just became an uncle,” he said with a proud smile. “I had to finish up some work before heading back home for good. I’m going be a firefighter actually.”

OMG YES I KNEW IT. Saileen for the win. My heart. 🥹💓💓

“Cause I’m gonna blow your mind, sweetheart.” He revved the engine and took off like a bat out of hell, going faster and faster, so fast your heart was in your throat. “Here we go!”

Oh is that all he's gonna blow? 😝

But I love these movie moments where you're riding on the back of his motorcycle and he goes faster to make your heart fall into your stomach. 😅

“Only flirt with you, got it,” he said. You playfully punched his arm, Dean letting your hands linger one last moment before pulling away. “In a another life, sweetheart.”

Noooo don't let her go!!! That "another life" could be right effing now. 😭

Eileen was always on you about living a life more outside of hunting and now that you’d officially retired, you were about to start living it more.

OH MY GOD WHAT??????? You totally got me there, I did not expect that but I LOVE where this is going loll.

“You’re Y/N Y/L/N, Eileen’s bestie?” You both nodded, Sam picking up the package and looking at you both like you were nuts. “Uh, do you two know each other?” asked Sam. “Some would say intimately,” said Dean. 

Deeeeeean, I cannot with you. 🤣🤣

“You want a visitors pass to the insane asylum in my head?” he laughed dryly. “Visitor pass? Honey, I live there, just a different ward is all.” He flashed his eyes open, green orbs hesitant. “I ain’t doing this out of the goodness of my heart. I’m screwed up too and you’re going to have to give as good as you get. I need that. You need that. So either walk away if you just want to be friends-”

Ooh what a good line in her response. She has just as much trauma being a hunter as he does, it seems. She's being very straightforward and up front with what she's need of Dean too. She can't fix him and he can't fix her, but they can try to help each other move forward and start living their lives for them. 🥹💜

I love that last line too; their future is brighter together. I will ALWAYS read a S15 fix-it fic where both Sam AND Dean get the endings they deserve. (And you know I love a firefighter Dean. 😏❤️‍🔥)

What a lovely one-shot, friend! Thoroughly enjoyed this. 💕💕

Every Light

Summary: The reader is driving along a long stretch of highway when a mysterious stranger on a motorcycle shows up and decides to have some fun with her...

Pairing: Dean x reader

Word Count: 2,600ish

Warnings: language, implied smut

A/N: This fic takes place post 15x20 (with some canon fixes adjustments). Also, we all know (including Jensen) Every Light is 100% Dean coded, right?

____________

Your fingers tapped against the wheel with one hand, your other hand hung out the window of your car, dancing in the wind. Music blasted through the speakers of your SUV, Ramblin’ Man pouring out as you drove down the long stretch of quiet highway on the bright summer day. The barren Texas flatlands stretched for miles before you, not a single car in sight.

You let your foot go heavy on the pedal, racing across the plains, the warm wind nice across your cheeks. Driving all day from Phoenix to Austin wasn’t exactly fun, but you were in a good mood. A great mood. One of those rare moments of peace and serenity where you just felt still and whole.

You happy little bubble popped when you drove past a crossroads, a slick black motorcycle turning onto the highway behind you. Fuck. It was probably a cop. You’d been making good time too.

You sighed as it came up on you fast, tension rising in your bones as you waited for a siren, lights, something. 

The motorcycle pulled up on your side, crossing the dotted yellow line and keeping pace with you. You turned your head, getting a better view of the bike. Okay, definitely not a police officer. Not unless Texas shelled out for jet black racing bikes with no markings. The rider was in head to toe sleek black leather, tight against his body with padding built in you were sure of. You couldn’t see past his black as night tinted visor. He, and it was most definitely a he based on those shoulders, turned his head toward you before raising his hand, giving you a wave.

You raised your eyebrows behind your aviators. The rider gripped the handlebars again, starting to weave his bike left and right ever so slightly before he straightened again. You tilted your head when he lifted his right hand and signed a simple gesture. 

“Hi.”

Okay…what were the odds some crazed person knew sign language? Probably lower than average and if worst came to worst, you’d just gun it until you hit a town.

You waved back to him, the man sitting up more and returning it. Then he was leaning back even more, popping a wheelie. Your heart skipped as he tore down the highway besides you, only setting the bike down when you flailed your arm for him to get it down on the ground. He finally did so, pointing at himself and looking around when you frowned at him.

“Behave down there!” You shouted out the window, even though he’d never hear it. He simply kept driving next to you, playing as he did so, doing something even more reckless each time he got you to laugh or smile.

But eventually you were coming up on a town and the roads were about to get busier. He made a quick gesture with his hand before taking off ahead of you, getting in front of you in your lane and disappearing down the road.

“Boys,” you mumbled, trying not to think of the last thing he’d signed.

“I had fun, sweetheart. Let’s do it again sometime.”

Six Hours Later

You’d wearily made it to Austin and after a quick shower at your hotel, you headed out to grab dinner at a local bar. 

“Hi,” said a handsome man when he took a seat next to you at the crowded bar top. 

“Hi,” you said politely, returning your gaze to scanning the menu. The stranger's eyes lingered though, your head turning slightly to find a smile on his face. “Can I help you?”

“No, just funny running into you again today.” You raised an eyebrow, the man chuckling. “You do that a lot, don’t you?”

“I’ve never met you before in my life.”

“Darn it,” he said, feigning a sigh. “Here I thought I made an impression. Did I not do enough wheelies?” Then he signed, “Sweetheart,” with his hand, flashing you a wink.

Your eyes went wide, the man smirking. “You! That was completely reckless.”

“So was going a hundred down the highway, rebel,” he teased. He turned his body to face you, smiling hard. “You’re telling me I wasn’t the best part of your day?”

“You’re a menace,” you said, picking up your drink.

“And that wasn’t a denial.” He waved down the bartender, pointing at your drink and holding up two fingers. “So. You like me better as the silent mysterious type with a helmet over my face?”

You rolled your eyes, taking the new drink. “It takes more than a pretty face to win me over, babe.”

“How about a ride on it?” You blinked. 

“A ride on your…” you swallowed, the man chuckling.

“My bike. Although you are more than welcome to ride anything of mine you like,” he said. You scoffed, ignoring the fact you hadn’t been with anyone in far, far too long and here was a man handsome as sin offering himself up to you. “Alright. I pushed too far. My apologies.”

“…Why do you know sign language?” you asked.

“My sister in law is deaf. I actually just became an uncle,” he said with a proud smile. “I had to finish up some work before heading back home for good. I’m going be a firefighter actually.”

He looked so…boyish for a moment that you smiled at his genuine pride.

“Good for you,” you said. “I’m just passing through myself. My old friend just had a baby up north.”

“So what’s to stop you from cutting loose tonight? I’ll even pay for dinner like a proper gentleman.” You glanced away, the man tilting his head when your eyes darted back. “I promise to be as well or badly behaved as you want.”

You looked him up and down, the man still sporting those boots and padded pants. 

Oh fuck it. 

“I ain’t getting on the back of that bike without a helmet.” His grin turned devilish, even when you held up a finger. “Calm down, big boy. Let’s see how you last through dinner.”

“You holding on tight?” asked Dean nearly two hours later when you were on the outskirts of the city. Only Dean. Tonight was a one time thing and that meant no last names, no histories, just plain old fun.

“Yeah, why?” you asked when he chuckled beneath you.

“Cause I’m gonna blow your mind, sweetheart.” He revved the engine and took off like a bat out of hell, going faster and faster, so fast your heart was in your throat. “Here we go!”

“What are you-“ You screeched when he popped a wheelie with you on the back, setting it down after only a few seconds. “Dean!”

“More you say?” Whatever you want, sweetheart.”

“Morning,” mumbled Dean, a kiss pressed against your temple. You groggily opened your eyes, the clock flashing that it was ten. You felt him pull the sheets up over your bare back, Dean running a hand over your head. “Wake up beautiful. You need a shower before you check out.”

“Yeah,” you yawned, sitting up in bed, watching him dress. He smirked as you openly eyed his body, Dean cupping your cheeks in his hands when he finished. “One night, right?”

“You deserve better than me, Y/N. You’ll find him someday. Until then though, just know you are the best I’ve ever had.”

“You say that to all the girls,” you laughed, Dean smiling.

“Wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it,” he said, kissing you once more. “Careful driving today.”

“You too. And don’t flirt with girls like that anymore. You’ll kill yourself on that bike.”

“Only flirt with you, got it,” he said. You playfully punched his arm, Dean letting your hands linger one last moment before pulling away. “In a another life, sweetheart.”

“Bye, Dean.”

You hadn’t planned on getting such a late start to the day but your night with Dean had been worth it. In a way, you wished you’d forced the issue and gotten his number at the very least. Sure, the motorcycle ride and sex were great but he was good company, funny and silly but something grounded to him that let you know you were safe with him. Eileen was always on you about living a life more outside of hunting and now that you’d officially retired, you were about to start living it more.

Including telling her all about your wonderful hookup.

You pulled up outside a house in Lawrence in the suburbs just after seven, barely up the front steps before the front door opened and Eileen hopped out, pulling you into a big hug.

“I missed you too,” you laughed, giving her a big squeeze, holding on tight. While you’d talked, you hadn’t been able to see her in person since she came back from the dead and this reunion was long overdue. “Come on, let me see the baby.”

“He just went down for bedtime. But he will happily see you in the morning,” she said, taking your hand and dragging you inside. “We just got the grill going out back.”

“Good. I’m starving and miss your burgers,” you said, letting her have another round of hugs with you. “Well if I can’t see the babe yet, you gotta let me meet your husband.”

“You know he has a brother that’s single,” she grinned, taking you through the house and to the back deck where a very tall man worked over a grill. “Sam! Y/N’s finally here!”

“Well it’s about time,” he said, picking you up in a hug. He smiled gently as he set you down. “I’m so happy Eileen has a friend in town.”

“Maybe you guys can give me advice on how the whole retirement thing works. I’ve just been traveling around aimlessly the past few months,” you said, taking a beer when Eileen offered it.

“You’ll figure it out,” said Sam, the rumble of an engine on the street out front echoing through the yard. 

“That’ll be his very single brother,” said Eileen. You rolled your eyes. “Oh come on, he hunted too! You guys would so get along now that you’re both retired.”

“I’ve dated other hunters and it never worked out, thank you very much,” you said.

“You’re lucky I managed to grab the last bag of franks,” said an all too familiar voice. You spun around, Dean, your Dean from last night, standing right in front of you wearing jeans and a white plain t-shirt. He dropped the package of hot dogs, both of you staring at the other. 

“I told you he was good looking!” joked Eileen.

“You?” asked Dean.

“You’re Dean fucking Winchester?” you asked, raising your eyebrows.

“You’re Y/N Y/L/N, Eileen’s bestie?” You both nodded, Sam picking up the package and looking at you both like you were nuts.

“Uh, do you two know each other?” asked Sam.

“Some would say intimately,” said Dean. 

“We’ll be right back,” you said, grabbing his bicep, ignoring the strength in it as you dragged him down the steps and around the corner of the house. You stared at him, Dean running a hand through his hair. “I thought you were a fireman!”

“I’m about to start my training. I was in Phoenix, cleaning up one last job but…someone had already fixed the sigils,” he mumbled. “You?”

“Yes, me,” you said, closing your eyes, putting your hands on your hips. “I worked out of Washington mostly. Eileen asked if I would clean up a sigil on my way down here. I-I’m staying here for a bit to help with the baby while I find a place in town.”

“So you’re that friend of hers…” he trailed off, eyes darting around your face. His lips parted but no words escaped them. An unpleasant crack tore through your heart. Gone was the happy go lucky flirt from twelve hours ago. Instead a man filled with horrors beyond imagination stood before you, a desperation in his eyes that made your skin crawl. 

“You were wrong back at the hotel.” He shook off whatever thoughts were running through his mind, confusion entering the forefront of his mind. “This morning you said I deserved better than you.”

“You do,” he said without missing a beat. “I’m-”

“Dean Winchester. I’ve heard about you. We all have,” you said softly, taking one of his hands in yours. He swallowed, closing his eyes. “You deserve the world and I’m not just saying that because of last night. You more than did your part.”

“I’m not the guy from last night. I am severely fucked up-”

“Oh get in line, Winchester.” He blinked rapidly, brows furrowing. “You think you’re the only one with daddy issues and who’s died and seen the shit hunters do? No, you’re not. There’s plenty of us who have. I retired because of you. I retried because Eileen told me her friends the Winchesters saved us all and I could quit. I should quit. She told me to live my life. So you and me? We’re going to live our lives as fucked up as we are. And last night…fuck, I had fun. You had fun. I forgot about the nightmares and I think you did too. You think Eileen and your brother aren’t as screwed up as us? Of course they are but they aren’t scared to do the hard thing and move on. So why not us too? It doesn’t have to be together but-”

“Shut up,” he said, slamming his lips to yours. It was hard, rough. Something possessive underneath the surface that had you sucking in air when he pulled back, tugging your bottom lip along the way. 

“Kissing me won’t make me shut up, Winchester,” you breathed, Dean ghosting over your lips, cradling a hand against the back of your neck to keep you close. “We aren’t strangers anymore. You want more, you got to give me more.”

“You want a visitors pass to the insane asylum in my head?” he laughed dryly.

“Visitor pass? Honey, I live there, just a different ward is all.” He flashed his eyes open, green orbs hesitant. “I ain’t doing this out of the goodness of my heart. I’m screwed up too and you’re going to have to give as good as you get. I need that. You need that. So either walk away if you just want to be friends-”

“Odds are this crashes and burns,” he said. Your hands slid to his cheeks, smirking up at him. “What?”

“Good thing I got my own firefighter then.” He raised an eyebrow, smiling when you tilted your chin up. “Stealing my moves?”

“Just remembered you were warned, sweetheart.”

“We’re going to work on that self-talk.” You tiled your chin further, Dean meeting your mouth, a smile in it. For the first time in a long time, in years, you let yourself think about a future and what that looked like. Dean pulled away slowly when Sam called for you both, his thumb brushing your chin.

“I’m sure I’ll get the hang of it with some help,” he murmured, trailing his knuckles down your arm, stopping at your hand to lace your fingers together.

Yeah, the future was looking a little brighter these days.

_________________

[liliapleasesteponme]

Avis Amberg nsfw alphabet

Avis amberg x fem!reader

Summary - an nsfw headcannon for each letter of the alphabet

This whole thing is a warning

NOTE i will be making more of these for different characters !!

Taglist - @delusionalforolderwomen @lilia-calderus-pet-goat @bravewithacapitalb @live-laugh-love-lupone @lemz378 @emilynissangtr @sapphic-girlss @mgruiz @multixfan @angeliccs @ilovepattilupone @renyfisher @tinnisamy @thegoddamnfeels

Aftercare

She loves when you give her aftercare, complimenting and praising her on how good she was. It makes her feel extra special. She does try to give aftercare but she's not as good at it as you

Body part

She adores your fingers. The way they caress her body, the way they can give her such pleasure

You love her face, its amazing to look at and sit on

Cum

She can cum alot and when she does she becomes VERY vocal about it.

When you cum she always licks it all up, wanting to savor your taste as long as she can

Dirty Secret

During her first time with a woman, she was embarrassed by how inexperienced she was so she tried to bury her face into the pillows to hide her moans but instead they became louder whimpers instead. She thinks about that alot

Experience

Obviously she's no stranger to sex but she is very inexperienced in sex with women so you end up teaching her a few new things

Favourite nicknames

She loves being called mama and when things get more intense she sometimes likes being called mistress.

For you, she uses a wide range of nicknames but she always adds 'my' to them just for a little reminder of who you belong to

Goofy

I dont think she'd be one to make jokes while the two of you are being intimate, she would maybe make a joke or two during foreplay though

Hate

I think she would be one to indulge in hate sex (but only as roleplay), often. with you saying things like, "oh you're such a bitch" And her replying with, "i don't hear you telling me stop."

Intimacy

She always tries to be as intimate and passionate as she can, wanting to make you feel about her the same way she feels about you (you do but she second guesses herself)

She somehow even manages to make quickies feel intimate and romantic

Jack Off

Ok im just gonna say it―i think she masturbates ALOT. You make her very horny and who is she not to indulge when she can't have you to take care of her ?

Kink

1000% has a praise kink. She loves loves loves being praised (it makes her feel validated)

I think she would also like trying orgasm control, hear me out, because she sees it as a challenge. She often finds it really hard not to cum so she enjoys the thrill it gives her

Location

She prefers the bedroom because it feels more personal but she's down for doing it almost anywhere as long as its not too public

Motivation

She's always horny for you. Wearing something revealing ? She's horny. You casually praise her for something ? She's horny. You compliment her ? She's horny. Honestly just seeing you turns her on so ...

NO

I don't think there would be much that she's opposed to and if you say a new thing she'll be down to try it, if she doesn't like it she will tell you

Oral

It would take her a while to get comfortable with giving oral since she's not used to it but once she is OMG is she amazing at it !!! Girlie knows how to work that tongue

She loves receiving oral cause she is always amazed by how incredible your tongue makes her feel

Pace

She likes to start slow, savoring the moment, but once she gets going its FAST. She's being pounded at brutal paces and she loves it

Quickie

Like I've said she prefers to be intimate to savour the moment but if she really needs it she'll give tou a certain look of longing that makes you understand exactly what she's asking

Risk

Risk is thrilling to her. Leaving a door open so someone could walk in ? She's down, loves it. It adds an element of suspence into her life and the thought of getting caught turns her on massively

Stamina

Mama has crazy stamina ! She can go round after round for hours on end, she'll keep going until you're tired or want to stop

Toys

I can imagine she has a drawer full of toys. Vibrators, straps, clamps and everything else you could think of

Unfair

She can be unfair at times, focusing more on her pleasure than yours but once she realises she's been onky focusing on herself she feels bad and does everything she can to make you feel just as good as she does

Volume

LOUD. SOUND-BARRIER-BREAKINGLY LOUD

Wild Card

She likes people to think she's a dom but she's really a power bottom

eXtreme

As she becomes more familiar with being with women, she does like to experiment with some things that are more on the extreme side

Yearning

She definitely has an intense desire for you, she always wants you, even when ita not for sex, but just to be in your presence

ZZZ

Normally, she'll wait for you to fall asleep and then she'll let herself wind down. She has a routine concerning her hair and makeup both morning and night that she needs to stick to so she waits for you to be comfortable before completing her routine and relaxing herself

[theocddiaries]

Shadow: How’s Tails? Any better? Sonic: No. Ever since he had that nightmare about the tooth fairy, he’s been a nervous wreck. I can’t leave his side. Shadow: Hm. Sonic, when was the last time you spent time with your brother? One on one. Sonic: I took him to the dentist on Tuesday. Shadow: I mean doing something fun. Sonic: Hey, he had a blast scolding the dentist for having outdated magazines. …Okay. I don’t know, I saw him doing his own thing, and he’s not a little kid anymore, so I just gave him some space. But you might be right. I’ll talk to him. Tails! Can you come here for a second? [Tails comes out of his room with a broom and a tranquilizer gun, scanning the room before sitting on the couch, still on guard. Shadow and Sonic exchange a worried glance.] Sonic: Okay, buddy… [takes the gun from him]: Give me that. Look, I got the message. Tomorrow we’ll do whatever you want and I’ll make your favorite food, and we’ll have a sleepover. We’ll spend the whole day together. But please, drop the tooth fairy nonsense. Tails: It’s not nonsense, she’s really here! Sonic: Tails, I’m really sorry I made you feel abandoned. [From the hallway, Knuckles appears wearing a grotesque papier-mâché head with crudely drawn facial features, a disheveled wig under a tattered veil. He looks both ways before slipping into the bathroom.] Tails [screaming and pointing]: Aaah! There she is! There she is! [Shadow and Sonic turn, but Knuckles is already gone.] Sonic: Tails, there’s nothing there. Shadow: Okay, how about this? I’ll go spend a week with Rouge so you two can spend time together like old times. Tails: I don’t give a damn about your life, you egomaniac! There’s a lunatic in the house who wants to rip my teeth out! Aaaaaaaaah! There she is again! [Knuckles comes out of the bathroom, scratching his head in confusion. He heads toward the kitchen.] Sonic: Tails-- Tails: Look, look that way, please! [Sonic rolls his eyes and turns around.] Sonic: Tails, pal, there’s nothing. Tails: Yes, there is! She hides right when you look! She’s evil! Shadow: Kid, enough, okay? Your brother and I aren’t playing along anymore-- [Knuckles walks into the living room and taps Sonic on the shoulder while Shadow talks. Sonic turns around, sees him, and starts screaming along with Tails.] Sonic: Aaaaah! She’s real! Shadow: You aren't help-- Damn it! Tails: I told you! [shoves Shadow before running out]: Take him instead! [runs out of the house screaming] Knuckles: Hey, calm down, it’s me!!! Sonic: Knuckles? Knuckles: Help me get the head off, it’s stuck. Shadow [removes it after a few tries]: What the hell do you think you're doing?? Knuckles: Me? Bringing back the magic for Tails. Shadow: How? By haunting him dressed like La Llorona? Knuckles: No, I’m the tooth fairy. Sonic: That's great, because you’re gonna need new teeth when I knock yours out, you idiot! The kid’s terrified! He hasn’t slept in three days, he’s more owl than fox at this point because of you! Shadow: Look, you’re going to tell Tails it was you pulling one of your dumb stunts. Knuckles: I can't tell him. That’s like Superman admitting he’s Spider-Man. It ruins the magic. Shadow: What magic? You’ve got a serious problem with language. That costume causes a lot of things: disgust, unease, terror, but magic ain’t one of them! Sonic: I spent countless hours editing VHS tapes and DVDs so the kid could watch Bambi without the mother’s death scene, and you traumatized him in one night. First and last time you scare him like this! And especially the last time you mention the stupid tooth fairy! Knuckles: Stupid tooth fairy? Well, then, let’s call Santa Claus ‘fat bastard’ and Kermit the Frog ‘amphibian jerk’ while we’re at it! There's no values anymore! Bitter losers! [storms off] Sonic: Unbelievable… Knuckles [comes back]: Sorry, guys, I lost my head. Sonic: Thank you. Knuckles: Hm? No, I mean literally, I lost the head for my costume… Oh wait, here it is. [picks it up]: So, screw you both, Grumpy and Grumpier.

[em1989ts]

𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐦𝐞

five hargreeves x reader smut

word count: 1.9k

warnings: enemies to lovers smut 18+, five and reader are 20, kinda switch! five? idek, choking, fingering, unprotected piv

summary: you and five return to elliot's after a failed attempt at reaching reginald at the mexican consulate, leading to a fight that leads to a little more...

author's note: i need to come up with some new stuff cause pretty much every single fic has the same dynamics but i just love it so much i can't stop lol, also i'm still working on a request but it made me think of this so i got a little distracted lol

not proofread

“It’s your fault he got away in the first place.” 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” 

You and Five, your bothersome partner at the time traveling agency known as The Commision, were making your way up the stairs back up to Elliot’s place. 

After failing to save the world back in 2019, Five managed to muster up enough energy to time travel with you and his siblings to get you all out of danger. He ended up dropping you and his family off at different points in time between 1960 and 1963 in Dallas, Texas. 

You had only gotten here two days before he did, staying in Elliot’s giant home and sifting through his enormous collection of conspiracies. It was you who accidentally planted that alien idea in his head when he watched you use your power. Whoops. 

“You were the one who got all soft on seeing your daddy again that you gave up our hiding spot and made him run off,” you retorted. 

You made your way over to the door before Five blinked inside without you. Hearing his footsteps walk away, you sighed and pulled the key you had borrowed out of your pocket and opened the door. Five blinked the two of you a majority of the way here, as far as his energy could take you, leaving Diego and Lila behind to walk all the way here. 

“And we could’ve caught up with him if you would just hold your own,” he scoffed, already having poured himself a cup of coffee and heading into Elliot’s living room. 

“You think I can’t hold my own? How many goddamn times have I saved your ass while you were getting beat down, Five?”

You were getting even more pissed, raising your voice now as you walked over to him angrily. 

“Not to mention you only had to deal with one of those assholes while I had to fight two! In heels! And even after you tossed your guy out the window, you just blinked off! Some partner you are.” 

You pushed him a little as you emphasized your words. Of course, he was a good partner when it mattered, he did save your life after Vanya blew up the moon after all. But it sure seemed like he didn’t care about you at all in moments like this. 

He almost lost your balance when you put your hands on him, spilling his coffee over the side of the mug. Setting it down, he turned to you with an angry glare and shoved you back. 

“Well don’t go thinking you can fight me now, Y/N,” he said, almost daring, “Because trust me, you won’t win-” 

As he was finishing his sentence you took a fast swing to the side of his face, before he caught it and blinked you both into the small guest room that Elliot lended you both. 

He twisted your arm back and threw you forward onto the wooden floor. The room was dim except for a warm tiffany lamp on the bedside table. The air was clear and warm due to the open window, letting in the sounds of Dallas nightlife. 

You landed rough on your hands and knees. Maybe you shouldn’t have picked another fight considering you were still sore from earlier, but you weren’t going to back down now. 

After looking up at him for a moment, all smug yet still awaiting your next move, you quickly got up and tackled him, thinking it’d be easier on you to take this fight down to the ground. 

Five braced himself from your impact and blinked, not wanting to hit the hard floor, and you both landed onto the guest bed. The anger in your eyes never left as you landed a punch right on his cheek, your might distracting you from your new position. 

Before you could pull your arm back to hit him a second time, he wrapped his fingers around your forearm and used his other hand to grab you by the throat. 

A whimper left you as he tightened his grip, cutting off your airway. Bringing up your other hand, you tried to peel his fingers off your neck. Yet he didn’t let up, his fingers getting tighter and tighter, waiting for you to tap out. 

You inevitably did, your muscles way too tired to fight this stupid battle, as you tapped your hand on his wrist to get him to release you. 

When he let go, you brought your hand to your neck, massaging where his harsh grip once was as you caught your breath quickly. 

You hadn’t fully taken in your position, but Five sure had. 

He watched you as you laid on top of him, crading him, sitting just where he wanted you to. 

You looked dazed, all red in the face, hair a little messed up, chest raising as you panted heavily, his hormones had been driving him insane ever since the two of you traveled back and landed in your 20 year old bodies. 

It took you another moment to get the blood flowing through your brain again, but once it did, it acknowledged how you were sitting on top of him, pressing against a growing bulge in the front of his dress pants. 

Your breathing slowed more as you looked down to where your crotch met his before meeting his eyes. He stared at you with nothing more than lust darkening his irises and a flush on his cheeks. 

A smile crept on your face as you looked at him beneath you, eyeing his lips slightly before leaning forward, lowering yourself and meeting them with yours. 

His lips moved with yours perfectly as he pushed further into the kiss. He was about to move his hands to entangle them in your hair, but you had taken them in your hand and brought them up over his head.  

The kiss was definitely messy. Tongues clashing and lip biting, you were surprised neither of you drew a little blood. 

You felt him trying to assert dominance in your mouth as you fought right back, his hands remained held together until suddenly he blinked free. 

You landed on the bed, confused for a moment until you saw a blue flash in the corner of your eye. His hands landed on your shoulders, strongly flipping you onto your back, maneuvering himself to be in between your open legs, and immediately latching onto your neck, causing you to let out a gasp at the sensation. 

Instead of holding them above your head, he grasped both your hands in one of his and held them to your chest, reaching down under your pleated sixties skirt, feeling you through your underwear. 

“A little fight gets you this wet?” he teased softly as he nipped at your neck. 

You bit your lip, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of getting any more noises out of you. The fact that you were this wet for him was already bruising your ego.

He peeked up to see the look on your face, admiring the struggle he was putting you through as he slowly rubbed your slit through your panties while sucking harsh marks into your neck. 

He moved the damp fabric to the side, coating his fingers in your slick, before stuffing them into you. The little gasp you let out satisfied him but not to the extent to which he would’ve liked, so he kept at it, moving his fingers through you, reaching that deep spot that made your eyes roll back in pleasure. 

Once he picked up the pace, he could tell it was getting harder for you to keep quiet, with the tiniest of whimpers leaving your lips. The palm of his hand met your clit as the pressure became too much. You turned your head into the soft pillow which your head laid upon to stifle your noises. 

He didn’t like this however, as he let go of your hands in front of your chest and grasped your chin instead, squeezing your cheeks slightly to keep your mouth open. 

At this point it was no use. The pressure built up inside you as he planted kisses on your neck, with little teases of encouragement, telling you you let go, which you did. 

Moans, pleading, and chants of curses spilled from your open mouth as the growing pleasure finally gave in, letting you come hard all over his fingers. 

He let you ride out your high slightly as he admired your face. The usual stern and angry look you usually addressed to him was long gone, now replaced with a dazy, flushed look with dilated pupils as wide as saucers. 

He removed his fingers slowly, before flipping up your skirt and pulling your underwear off entirely, before unzipping his pants and pausing before he lowered his own underwear. 

Leaning back down to kiss you softly, he made sure you were okay with continuing. Once he received your quick, eager nod, he finally released himself after being restrained against his tightening boxers for so long. 

As he leaned over you, you observed him closely. His dark hair now messy, his usually cold green eyes now softened, you’ve never seen Five look so not put together but you loved it. 

Him sliding inside you broke you out of your thoughts. He fell into the crook of your neck once again as he groaned at the feeling of your walls surrounding him, your warmth was too much. Your head dipped back, almost hitting the headboard as you didn’t even bother stopping yourself from letting out whimpers every time he hit that spot. He quickly rutted into you as you both didn’t want to waste any time before getting to that high that your hormonal bodies have been craving ever since your consciousnesses had been thrown into them in 2019. 

Although the two of you weren’t that rough, you could still hear the headboard knocking into the wall every time he thrusted into you, but your mind felt mushy with the pleasure and couldn’t come up with the words to say anything. 

It wasn’t long before the two of you were panting each other's names and you felt the pressure built up again. You came loudly, squeezing him before he came too, pumping himself into you at a slowing pace before he stilled. 

The two of you were wrapped up in each other, panting into each other's faces, gasping as he pulled out slowly. 

You both quickly cleaned up and fixed your disheveled clothing, not making eye contact just yet, not knowing what this meant between you. 

Five ventured outside the room first, you were worried that maybe Diego or Lila overheard and were going to endlessly tease you both over the fact that the tension between you finally snapped. 

But instead, you heard your new acquaintance/host awkwardly question Five about alien procreation. 

~~~

[anpanbun]

share gay treebark facts about stagelight au immediately

1- Ren laying in bed watching very old song cover clips Martyn has on his AUstagram with a silly smile on his face

2- Ren loves listening to Martyn speak. Martyn loves watching Ren's mouth move when he's mouthing along to a song.

3- Their first kiss is after Martyn plays a gig and the crowd is just so so into the performance and it goes so so well and Ren is just so happy and excited for Martyn that he cant stop himself from just grabbing Martyn's face and kissing him

4- Martyn recognizes Ren as Red King instantly from an old photo because no amount of dramatic stage makeup will stop him from recognizing the face he spent a long time staring at

5- Before they're dating before Martyn even knows Ren was in Red King, someone flirts with Martyn after an open mic, and Ren gets so jealous. He's not one to just let it pass idly by at that point though, so he channels some of that old rockstar energy. He pushes his sunglass up off of his face and they push back his hair, he does the rockstar strut, he gently brushes his hand against Martyn's to let him know he's there, before wrapping arm loosely around his waist in a clear show of possessiveness. [This is so out of character for the, as Martyn as seen so far, shy, quiet, hot guy he's slowly befriending via texts and AUstagram messages. And this is a very funny scene to me cause of it]

6- I need to remind everyone that Ren has big hands, this is just an actual fact about the real life man. So with that here's something my friend Beans said: "i was just thinking about martyn sitting there with ren’s big hand on his shoulder like wow never noticed how big his hands are. haha. well anyways."

7- After Martyn knows about Ren's history, Ren offering to teach him his trick to doing this one super iconic riff from a Red King song. And of course, clearly the best way to show Martyn how to do this is to have Martyn sit in between Ren's legs with his back to Ren's chest so that he can slot his hands over Martyn's and rest his head on Martyn's shoulder to see their hands. Clearly.

8- Important knowledge, Ren has trauma related to alcohol because of the car wreck scandal and the press accusations (even though he was sober during that). So if Martyn drinks even a little bit while at or near Ren's house, Ren makes him stay the night. The first time this happened Martyn accidently fell asleep on Ren's bed while they were talking, and Ren can't just wake him up to ask him to move..... and he's kinda trapped cause Martyn is laying too close for Ren to be able to get up and go sleep in the guest room without disturbing him so.... oops guess theyre sharing a bed now. And what do you know that habit just continues every time Martyn sleeps over, oops.

9- Important knowledge, Ren is touch starved. Ren sitting on the floor so that Martyn can pet his hair and scratch behind his ears.

10- Ren gets horrible nightmares, and Martyn's voice helps soothe them, so on nights when Martyn isnt there. Ren listens to recordings of Martyn's song covers over and over again or calls Martyn in the middle of the night and Martyn knows to just yap about anything and everything until he hears the soft noises of Ren's sleeping breath.

If I say anymore anon I might explode into a million pieces

[kangshxrtie]

20 . the date

you were currently sitting on top of your bathroom counter getting your makeup done by julie while belle, sitting on the other side of the counter, managed the playlist.

"okay, tilt your head a bit this way," julie instructed, holding your chin lightly as she worked on your eyeliner.

"do not move," julie instructed, holding your chin lightly as she worked on your eyeliner. "i really don't feel like starting over on this."

"i'm not moving!" you whined, trying to stay perfectly still. "y'all act like i'm a child or something."

"because you are," julie teased, stepping back to admire her work. "alright, that's one eye done. belle, does this look good?"

belle leaned forward, inspecting your makeup. "it slays," she declared.

before you could respond, julie's phone buzzed on the counter. she glanced at it and sighed dramatically. "it's yunjin. she said, 'i'm literally fighting for my life in this traffic, but i'm almost there.'"

"she better not crash trying to get here," you muttered, knowing how yunjin got when she was excited for something.

julie finished your other eye and began rummaging through her bag for lip products. "don't worry. she's too stubborn to let anything stop her. plus, she'd never miss this. she's more invested in this date than you are."

"i am invested!" you defended yourself.

belle raised an eyebrow at you. "you are, but yunjin's on another level. she's probably gonna interrogate dani afterward."

"seems like some shit she would do," you said, shaking your head but smiling.

at that moment, the doorbell rang.

"that better be her," julie said, capping the lip gloss she'd picked out.

belle hopped off the counter and went to open the door. "yunjin's here! finally!"

"finally!" yunjin yelled from the doorway, her voice echoing through the apartment. moments later, she appeared in the bathroom, slightly out of breath but grinning. "i made it, y'all. the people on the streets tried me, but i persevered."

"you're just in time," julie said, holding up the gloss. "y/n's makeup is basically done. now we just need to pick the outfit."

you hopped off the counter, and the four of you made your way to your room, the energy buzzing with excitement. yunjin plopped down on the floor, leaning back against your bed, while julie and belle claimed the two chairs near your desk.

"alright, let's see the options," yunjin said, already making herself comfortable.

"i've got a few ideas," you replied, opening your closet. "i just need some second opinions."

"that’s what we’re here for," julie said, grinning.

you pulled out some of your outfit options, holding each one up for your friends to judge.

first up: light blue jeans, a pink top, and a light cream jacket, just in case the night got chilly.

second: baggy jeans, a white belt, a cute white tank, and a light brown jacket to pull it all together.

last: a light blue long-sleeve paired with a white skirt.

"i really like the first one, but maybe i’m just biased," belle said, tilting her head.

"nah, i think the second one’s the move," julie chimed in.

"yeah, you’ll match dani so good in that outfit," yunjin nodded in agreement.

"okay, at least i’m down to two options now," you said, eyeing the clothes.

belle squinted at you, then the outfits. "actually, i changed my mind. the second one’s gonna go with your makeup the best."

you laughed. "i don’t think picking my outfit has ever been this easy with y’all."

"’cause you finally gave us good options for once," julie teased.

"bitch, i’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that and protect my peace," you shot back, smirking.

"when are you gonna tell daniela you’re ready?" yunjin asked, glancing at the time.

"if i tell her i’m ready now, by the time i finish up, i should be good to go," you reasoned.

"then do that," belle said, tossing you your phone.

you quickly texted daniela.

"alright, she’s on the way," you announced.

"so, get dressed!" belle said, practically pushing you toward the bathroom.

"i’m trying!" you laughed, gathering everything you needed before disappearing to change.

when you stepped back out, all three girls let out loud cheers, yunjin even letting out a whistle.

"damn, you look so good," julie said, her eyes wide.

"i can’t believe i get to call you my best friend. you’re so hot," belle added dramatically.

"is it too late to tell you i’m in love with you?" yunjin joked, waggling her eyebrows.

"y’all are hyping me up way too much," you said, covering your face.

"just making sure you know to have standards," belle said, grinning. "expect nothing less from anybody."

"oh, i never would," you assured, smiling.

your phone buzzed again:

"she’s here. is it too late to kill myself?" you groaned, feeling the nerves kick in.

"i’m gonna go ahead and say yes," julie deadpanned.

"fine, i guess i’ll go," you sighed, but you couldn’t help but laugh.

"i’m sure you’ll have fun," yunjin said, her voice soft but encouraging.

"just text us if she gets weird—or if you just wanna dip," belle reminded you.

you grabbed your bag, slipped on your shoes, and did one last mirror check by the door. with a deep breath, you turned back to your friends, waving as you headed out.

you were practically shaking with nerves as you stepped outside, but instead of calming you down, seeing daniela's car only made your heart beat faster. she was leaning against her car door, holding a bouquet of flowers in hand.

she looked over at you, eyes scanning your outfit. "damn, you look good."

heat rushed to your face. "shut up."

"alright, i’ll chill. i ain’t know if you like flowers or not, i just wanted to get you something," daniela said.

"i do. thank you," you said, taking them from her.

"we should probably leave now, 'cause it’s getting real hard not to act like i don’t see your friends staring at me through the window," daniela said.

"they are?" you turned around, only to see all your friends sitting there, ducking down the second they realized they were caught.

"yeah, let’s go," you laughed. daniela opened the door for you, letting you slide in before going around to the driver’s side.

"you ready?" daniela asked, starting up the car.

"yeah," you nodded, buckling in and setting the flowers in the backseat.

your phone vibrated against your leg for what had to be the fifth time in a row, making you sigh. "oh my god."

daniela side-eyed you at a red light. "who's blowing up your phone like that?"

you unlocked it, already knowing who it was. "julie, belle, and yunjin. they're the ones who helped me get ready, and now they won’t leave me alone."

she smirked. "lemme see."

turning the screen toward her, you let her skim through the messages.

daniela chuckled. "i see our group chats are pretty much the same."

"i know," you groaned, locking your phone. "they act like this ain’t the first time they’ve done this for me."

"i bet," daniela snorted. "well, i feel honored. they really had you prepped."

"you should feel honored," you teased. "they don’t do that for just anybody."

daniela placed a dramatic hand over her heart. "wow. special treatment."

"you're so annoying," you muttered, but you couldn’t hide your smile.

the ride was filled with easy conversation, just the two of you asking questions, swapping stories, and laughing like y’all had known each other forever.

you glanced over at daniela as she cruised through the city streets, one hand chill on the wheel, the other tapping to the beat of whatever was playing. the sun was dipping low, casting everything in that perfect golden hour glow, and you couldn’t help but wonder where she was taking you.

"so, are you gonna tell me where we're going on this date now?" you asked, curiosity getting the better of you.

daniela shot you a grin, her shades glinting in the light. "it’s a surprise."

you huffed, crossing your arms and pouting just a little. "i keep telling you i hate surprises."

she chuckled, that warm, easy kinda laugh. "you're gonna survive. trust me, you'll love this."

even though y’all had just started seeing each other, there was something about daniela that felt familiar, like you’d known her forever. maybe it was the way she moved like she owned every room, or maybe it was how she had you laughing without even trying.

plus, you couldn’t lie. you had a thing for the way she was dressed. she fits your type too well, wearing some shades to match her crop top and some bell-bottom jeans that hugged her just right.

"don’t worry though," daniela said, waving a hand like it was no big deal. "i'm not taking you anywhere crazy on our first date."

"mmm, if you say so," you replied, raising an eyebrow. "but if anything weird happens, i’m blocking you the second this date ends."

"damn, you mean as hell… that’s kinda hot," she admitted, and you caught the faint blush creeping up her cheeks.

eventually, she pulled into this plaza. there was a big mall, a movie theater, but what caught your eye was the massive mini-golf course that had just popped up.

"mini golf?" you asked, glancing at her sideways.

daniela grinned, sliding her shades down her nose. "surprise!"

you blinked, then a smile crept across your face. "how'd you know i liked mini golf?"

"yoonchae told me," she admitted. "said you was into this kinda stuff."

you laughed soft, feeling that little wave of warmth hit. "can’t believe she remembered that."

daniela leaned over, her shoulder brushing yours. "well, now’s your chance to prove how good you are at this."

"yeah," you said, grinning. "and i’m definitely finna beat you."

daniela raised an eyebrow, smirking "oh, that’s how you feel?"

"maybe," you shot back, playful.

"okay then," she said, swinging the car door open. "let’s put a lil’ wager on it."

"what do you have in mind?"

"loser buys dinner."

you chuckled. "bet."

y’all walked into the course, the faint sound of some orchestral music floating through the air. the whole place was jurassic park-themed, with dinosaur statues and little easter eggs from the movies everywhere.

at the first hole, styled like a tiny forest with a velociraptor nearby, daniela stepped up first. she sized up the shot, holding the club with that same confidence she carried everywhere.

"i ain’t done this in forever, so don't expect too much," she said, then swung the club.

to both your surprise, that ball rolled smooth across the fake grass and plopped right into the hole. a hole-in-one.

your jaw dropped. "there's no fucking way."

daniela laughed, looking just as shook as you felt. "guess i’m better than i thought."

trying to play it cool, you snatched the club from her hands. "okay, you're good… but i was a mini-golf pro back in the day."

"then show me what you got, ma’am," she teased.

you lined up your shot, took a breath, and swung. the ball rolled… and missed the hole entirely.

"man, stupid ass ball," you muttered.

daniela tried, and failed, to hide her grin. "somebody a lil’ rusty, huh?"

"next hole, i got you," you said, trying to sound confident.

and that’s how it went. daniela was out here playing like she’d been doing this her whole life, while you were struggling to find your groove. you managed a couple holes-in-one, but she was still holding the lead.

by the halfway point, you decided to go first, trying to flip the script. you aimed, swung… and sunk the ball clean into the hole.

"yes!" you yelled, throwing your hands up.

daniela whistled, impressed. "alright, i see you tryna catch up."

you shot her a smug look. "couple more and i’m winning this."

"you really think you gon' beat me in these next nine holes?" she teased.

"oh, i know i am," you replied, all confidence.

the competition started heating up for real, y’all going back and forth, outscoring each other at every hole. eventually, y’all made it to the final one.

"you first," you said, grinning.

"nah, i insist—ladies first," daniela shot back.

"you a lady too."

"yeah, but you more of a lady than me."

you laughed, shaking your head. "dani, just hit the damn ball."

daniela smirked and got in position. but right as she swung, an idea hit you. just as her club connected with the ball, you leaned in and gave her a little playful tap on the ass.

she gasped, and the ball veered off, missing the hole.

her jaw dropped. "you… that was dirty, and you know it!"

you burst out laughing. "i ain’t never said i play fair."

daniela shook her head, laughing right along with you. "good, ‘cause neither do i."

before you knew it, she stepped closer, her smile softening "you trouble, you know that?"

"you like it," you teased, feeling your heart race a little faster as the space between y’all disappeared.

she leaned in, her lips brushing against yours, just a brief, warm touch that sent a spark shooting through you. it wasn’t much, but it was enough to leave you wanting more.

y’all looked at each other, eyes locking, and then you both laughed soft, the tension melting into something easy.

"so," you whispered, still smiling. "guess we both buying dinner?"

"looks like it," she agreed.

you picked up your club. "but let me finish this game first."

"actually," daniela said, stepping behind you and wrapping her arms around your waist. she placed her hands over yours on the club. "i got a better idea."

together, y’all lined up the shot. with her guiding your hands, you swung, and the ball rolled perfectly into the hole.

you turned to her, your heart pounding in a way that had nothing to do with the game. "what—" you started, your voice soft, "what’s next?"

daniela’s grin was warm, like the last light of the sun. "now we hit the arcade."

you laughed. "bet. you're definitely losing."

"we’ll see about that," she shot back, and you both walked off, the night just getting started.

inside, the arcade was buzzing with the sounds of games, laughter, and folks yelling over wins and losses. daniela led you straight to a row of racing games, but after a few rounds, and some embarrassing losses on your part, you decided it was time to switch it up.

"alright, i’m picking the next game," you declared, already scanning the arcade for something that you knew you were good at.

daniela walked beside you, hands stuffed in her jeans pockets. "we should make a bet. that way, when i win again, you owe me something."

you stopped in your tracks, making her halt too. "why do you think you're gonna win?"

"cause i’m better," she shot back, plain as day, but that little smile on her face gave her away.

you squinted at her. "bet’s on. if i win, you buy me dutch every morning for a week."

daniela hummed, pretending to think. "bet. and if i win, you buy me lunch for a week."

"shake on it," you grinned, and the two of you clasped hands, locking it in before resuming your search.

eventually, you landed on an air hockey table.

"for real?" daniela raised a brow.

"yup," you nodded. "there's no complicated controls. whoever wins is actually better."

"aight then," she smirked, sliding to one side while you took the other.

"you're gonna lose so bad," she taunted, grabbing the puck.

"yeah, aight," you shot back, gripping your striker tight.

the game kicked off with both of y’all fiercely guarding your goals, neither letting the puck slip through. but the moment daniela left the tiniest opening, you pounced, slamming the puck forward. she barely had time to react before it slid right into her goal.

"man, i let you have that round," she claimed, snatching the puck back.

"uh huh, sure you did," you smirked.

next round, daniela barely flicked her wrist and that puck shot clean into your goal.

"1-1," she grinned, smug as hell.

"not for long," you said, plopping the puck back on the table.

back and forth, y’all battled like it was life or death. you snuck in a slick shot that caught daniela slipping, making her groan out loud.

"aren't you a whole-ass dancer? where are them reflexes at now?" you teased, laughing.

"i let you have that one too!" daniela shot back, but that flustered look on her face? gave her away.

"keep telling yourself that," you chuckled, feeling the win in your bones.

the game raged on, both y’all too stubborn to back down. you were just one point away from victory when daniela slid in a quick goal, smirking like she already won.

"this my comeback," she announced, eyes gleaming.

you played that last round smart, waiting for her to get too focused on one side. the moment she left the other side wide open, you struck.

the puck slid smoothly into her goal.

"get fucking wrecked" you cheered, throwing your hands up like you just won the championship.

"ain’t no way," daniela huffed, shakig her head. "you definitely practiced for this."

"maybe i played with my mom a lot growing up," you shrugged, wearing the smuggest grin.

"nah, this wasn’t a fair game. i need a rematch," she insisted, trying to hold back her own smile.

"nope, dani," you laughed, pointing at her. "a deal’s a deal."

she groaned all dramatic-like. "can’t believe you just hustled me like that."

you just laughed harder, the sound mixing in with the chaos of the arcade.

the night rolled on, full of more games and playful trash talk, until you were both worn out. 

"you ready for dinner now?" daniela asked.

"there's more?" you blinked.

"umm, of course. i gotta feed you," daniela grinned. "and i remember that bet we made about splitting dinner."

"i only made that bet 'cause i thought we were eating here," you shot back.

"i can't believe you were tryna cheap out," she teased.

"umm, excuse me, arcade food is actually expensive," you defended.

"i mean, yeah, but compared to where i'm takin' you?" daniela smirked, picking up her pace towards the car.

"i'm sorry, i don't think i heard you clearly," you said, matching her stride.

"i didn't really say anything," she shrugged.

"you will not gaslight me on our first date," you warned.

"i'm not! i didn't say anything," daniela laughed.

"so now i'm just hearing things?" you raised an eyebrow.

"exactly. now get in the car," she said, holding the door open for you.

"you're annoying," you muttered, sliding into the seat.

daniela chuckled, shutting your door before jogging to the driver's side. she started up the car and pulled out of the lot.

"did you make a reservation yet? 'cause i can do it," you offered.

"don't worry, i got it all handled," daniela assured.

"can i at least look up the menu then? just to know my options." and to look at the prices.

"they'll give us menus when we get there," daniela told you.

"just tell me, when you search up the restaurant, how many price tags does it have?"

"you think i remember that?" daniela laughed.

"then tell me the name so i can check."

"you'll be fine. i'm not takin' us somewhere that expensive."

"i don't trust your judgment. i've seen what you wear and what car you drive," you shot back.

"just chill. you'll see when we get there," she said.

"i'm leavin' if i see three digits on that menu," you warned.

the rest of the drive was filled with comfortable silence, daniela's playlist humming through the speakers as you both soaked in the vibe. when you finally pulled up to the restaurant, your suspicions were confirmed, this place definitely had "dip into your savings" written all over it.

daniela gave her name to the hostess, and you were seated almost immediately.

"yeah, dani, i'm not even gonna look at the third page 'cause apparently the numbers only go up from here," you whispered, eyeing the menu.

"y/n, you're literally not paying," daniela chuckled.

"what about going half?"

"i was never actually gonna make you pay. i asked you out," she said, smiling.

"in that case, i will look at the third page," you grinned.

"whatever you want," daniela laughed lightly.

the waitress came by to take your drink orders, and by the time she returned, you'd both settled on what you wanted to eat.

"can i finally get your number now?" daniela asked, leaning back in her chair.

"oh—yeah," you agreed, holding out your hand. she unlocked her phone, opened her contacts, and passed it to you. you quickly typed your number in.

"what should i make my contact name?" you asked, glancing up at her.

"whatever you want," daniela smirked.

"so just my name?" you teased.

"i mean, if that's what you want," she shrugged casually.

you went simple, naming yourself "y/n" with a colored heart emoji.

"can i name myself in yours?" daniela asked, taking her phone back.

"i don't know if i want you to," you teased.

"i'm not gonna do anything crazy, trust," daniela promised.

"i'm changing it immediately if it's some weird shit," you warned, handing her your phone.

"don't do that," daniela whined as she put her number in and named her contact.

the rest of dinner flowed effortlessly. the conversation was easy, the food was bomb, and you couldn't deny the little spark you felt growing.

after leaving the restaurant, neither of you wanted the night to end, so daniela just drove around the city. you watched the lights blur past the window, vibing to her playlist and talking about everything and nothing. but eventually, it got late, and you realized you hadn't even glanced at your phone, your friends were probably freaking out about, but you'd deal with that later.

daniela pulled up in front of your house and hopped out to walk you to the door. you grabbed your flowers from the back seat and followed her up the steps.

"tonight was fun," she admitted, hands in her pockets.

"yeah," you nodded, smiling. "it really was."

"i'll text you later," daniela said shyly, her confidence from earlier softening a bit.

"you fucking better," you teased.

you pulled out your keys to unlock the door but fumbled, dropping them on the porch. as you both bent down to grab them, your faces were suddenly inches apart, the air thick with tension.

"did you drop your keys on purpose so we could have a moment like this?" daniela teased.

"okay, don't get too confident now," you laughed, standing up with your keys in hand.

"if you wanted to kiss me, just say that," she smirked.

"even if i did want to kiss you, i think i have regrets now," you shot back, but your grin gave you away.

"wait, i take it back then," daniela said quickly. "forget everything i just said and go back to when you wanted to kiss me."

"i don't think i can," you teased.

"fuck, i fumbled," daniela groaned, rubbing her face.

"i wouldn't complain if you did kiss me, though," you admitted softly.

that was all daniela needed. she leaned in, kissing you hard but somehow soft at the same time, leaving you breathless.

"i should go in before we get carried away," you murmured, pulling back slightly, feeling dazed.

"that's a smart idea," daniela agreed, though her eyes lingered on yours.

"see you later," you whispered, giving her one last quick kiss before unlocking your door and slipping inside.

thankfully, it was late enough that you managed to sneak into your room without getting heckled by your friends. it wasn't that you didn't want to talk about the date, you just needed a minute to process everything first. telling everybody about the date could wait until tomorrow.

BACK | MAIN | NEXT

TAGLIST 🪩 @saysirhc @wintersgff @sixflame438 @1luvkarina @ihrtantn @yeetaberry127 @urmom2314 @vrtualstar @sed7ction @inybits @ellezra @meganskiendielsbtc @firstclassjaylee @modanisgf @kristalag @chaepu @wtfisthisnoclueman

[chimuelo2005-blog]

More yapping about Jayce and his relationship with Viktor and Mel cause why not?

One of the most interesting things about Jayce’s character arc is how Mel and Viktor act as these two opposing forces in his life; both guiding him, both shaping him, but in very different ways. Mel represents power, ambition, legacy, the political weight of Hextech and everything it could be. Viktor represents innovation, raw intellect, and the heart of why Hextech even exists in the first place. Jayce is caught between them, constantly being pulled in two directions.

Mel teaches Jayce how to navigate Piltover, how to gain and control his power instead of letting it control him. She gives him the tools to actually use Hextech as more than just an invention— turn it into something that changes the world. Without her, he never would’ve made it onto the council, never would’ve learned how to play politics, never would’ve become the leader Piltover needed. But at the end of the day? Jayce was never truly Mel’s.

Because no matter how much Mel shapes him, no matter how much power she hands him, Jayce’s first and strongest connection is always Viktor. His first choice is always Viktor. Viktor is the reason Hextech exists. Viktor is the reason Jayce even believes in progress in the first place. And you see it in the way Jayce prioritizes him over and over again.

Mel offers Jayce power, and yeah, he takes it—but he hesitates. He falters. With Viktor? There’s no hesitation. Jayce is willing to risk everything for Viktor in a way he never does for Mel. Like, when Viktor starts slipping away, Jayce drops everything. He stops caring about politics, about his reputation, about the carefully constructed path Mel laid out for him. The second Viktor needs him, that’s it. He’s done playing the game. He’s ready to throw away everything if it means saving him. Mel is an influence in his life. Viktor is his foundation.

And what’s really sad about all of this is that Mel knows. She sees it. She knows that at the end of the day, she’s teaching Jayce how to be powerful, but Viktor is the one who actually owns his heart. She sees how quickly Jayce pulls away from her when Viktor starts getting worse, how his priorities shift without a second thought. She spent the entire second part of the show shaping Jayce into a leader, a politician, a visionary—but the second Viktor is in danger, Jayce doesn’t care about any of that. He only cares about him.

Mel may have given Jayce power, but Viktor is the only person he was ever willing to lose that power for. Mel was the one who taught Jayce how to build an empire. But Viktor? Viktor is the one thing that could make him burn it all down.

And that says everything about Jayce.

I've seen some people in the reblogs make good points I missed while making the post, so I'll add them here.

This post is about jayce's perception or what I think his perception is based on his actions. Once said that: No, Mel is not the black girlfriend, that's a huge disrespect of her character, she's a powerful, intelligent woman with complexities and flaws that go far beyond some guy.

I agree that Jayce loved Mel, to a certain point. His favoritism towards Viktor is not even conscious most of the time. He obviously loved and cared for her, if he didn't they wouldn't have been together. My point is that he loved her in a way that would never be matched to the way he loves Viktor, and that's ok. They are two separate people, it's obvious Jayce won't love them the same.

While writing the script, I believe the writers made their relationship to put Jayce between a rock and a hard place at times. Mel is progress, she's powerful, beautiful, kind, She symbolizes everything Jayce wants to achieve (talking about her symbolism in jayce's character, not her own character) . Viktor is his foundation, he's beginning, he's the constant in his life even before he knew it. That's what I mean by saying Jayce was never fully Mel's.

I agree that as a fandom we don't talk enough about characters individually, but I firmly believe that there are characters that you need to talk about while talking about others. You cannot really talk deeply about Mel without talking about her mom, her brother and so on.

I love my girl Mel and I will yap about her soon because she's just too pretty and interesting not to.

[disgruntleddemon]

i've racked my brain trying to figure out an in character way for Shifty to be integrated into the better world timeline main cast, but i'm throwing my hat it. they can be a little ooc for this. this is pretty long, so i'll put it under a cut:

sometime after Fiddleford moves in, but before him and Ford are officially together, the trio goes to check on the bunker (ford mentions planning on doing this in j3, so yayyy, an excuse for them to be there)

they quickly realize the cryotube is broken, and shifty has escaped (how did this happen? is that when shifty escaped in cannon? i have no idea, man) anyway, Fiddleford needs to go in with them to fix it, so Ford and Stan are on shifty hunting duty. meanwhile, shifty saw them, and assumes Stan is another shapeshifter

at some point, Ford and Stan get separated, so Shifty goes to Stan like "idk what that guy told you, but it's probably a lie. lets help each other escape!" Stan uses this to lure him to Ford lol

this is where we get the big confrontation/conversation between everyone. shifty wants out cause he was taken by Ford and Fiddleford for the sole purpose of being experimented on and being used to test the cryotubes. he wanted the journal to get new forms as a defense, and to use it as a guide for escape and life on the outside.

he's been playing nice at the moment and not attacking anyone to prove he'll be fine now. he just wants to go to the surface and live his life like he was supposed to if Ford had never found him.

every one else is not sure what to do. well, mostly Ford and Stan. Fiddleford is pretty set on the "put him back in the tube" approach

Ford is really flip flopping, he has a lot of trust issues after Bill, Shifty's original betrayal affected him, and it hurt Fiddleford (which was probably the worst part to Ford). but, he does see Shifty's perspective and feels kind of guilty.

i think i've spent like a week trying to figure out how they settle things, and i'm kinda calling it quits with that too. my best idea is a microchip. basically, Ford points out the cryotube thing really was unethical, and it broke before so it might again. plus, if they just leave shifty down there, he might tunnel his way out anyway, he's already forming some. and finally, killing him would also be unethical, and also a waste of an incredible scientific discovery .

so they decide to chip him and keep him at the cabin as a trial run. not great that shifty's still a prisoner, but i couldn't see them just letting him go. the chip, made by Fiddleford obviously, alerts them when shifty changes shape, if he manages to get it out, and prevents him from going too far out of a certain radius.

as time goes on, shifty is allowed to go further and further, and they trust him more. it's a very slow transition, that's mostly a matter of shifty becoming part of the daily routine. one of those "you can pretty much get used to anything after awhile" things.

i think they realize also, that shifty's still a juvenile. he's true form is still growing and changing. i put him somewhere in the 12-14 range. i haven't decided how they go about raising him just yet, but his human disguise is pretending to be Stan's son. between the mystery trio, stan having a random son makes the most sense.

shifty likes to keep his form kinda close to looking like himself, so if ppl ask about his appearance, he just says he's albino.

the transition period from not trusting him and being a prisoner, to being a proper member of the cabin is one i'm still very undecided on. but for now, i think the summery works well enough. once he's more comfortable with himself and his place in the house, shifty becomes very mischievous and adventurous! he likes doing pranks and getting into stuff

anyways, if anyone has any suggestions about him, i'm very open to it!! he's a hard character to figure out/integrate

[liliasenbyhusband]

Elizabeth Arden and Helena Rubinstein hate fucked

18+

In case it wasn’t clear by the title this is nsfw (especially the second part) so minors dni!!

Before I go on this rant I do want to say that I’ve only seen a couple of clips from this musical and have never fully seen it (if anyone has a link 👀). I do however listen to the soundtrack religiously and I’m a lesbian so I feel that qualifies me and makes me right about this.

Also please note this is about the characters and not the actual people!

Firstly their sexualities just cause I can:

I believe Helena Rubinstein is a lesbian, the only reason she ever entertained men is because that’s what was expected and needed to get where she wanted to get. In If I’d been a man she says “I love only men I can't caress” and that honestly sounds so much like someone experiencing comphet to me. Like only loving men you know you can’t have cause it brings you some solace that you at least still like men??? Of course we also have the absolute obsession with Elizabeth and like nothing is straight about that. On top of all of that in Forever Beautiful she very proudly talks about how Tamara De Lempicka had a crush on her which is also not very straight of her and then there is this little moment in No, Thank You where she talks to mr Paley about his wife that had me question if she’s fucking his wife… ngl… like the way she says “I insist, it’s sapphire, like her eyes” had me going like 🤨 “and how do you know that, ma’am???”.

I find Elizabeth Arden more difficult to place, I’m going to be honest. Of course the obsession with Helena is very fucking gay, it reminds me of the song ‘loathing’ from the wicked musical, so she is definitely sapphic. I believe she does like men as well though, like she was genuinely into her husband, I think. My gut is saying bisexual but with good arguments I could be persuaded of most other sapphic identities as well.

Now for the main event: they fucked.

They were obsessed with each other for half a century... HALF A CENTURY… that is a different kind of loathing like… that is a type of obsession that in and of itself is so fucking sapphic that I can’t even put it into words. Like they live in each other’s heads rent free. And when you think about someone that much, you can’t tell me that you don’t, at some level, want them. Once again think of the song ‘loathing’.. hate and love/lust are not opposite emotions, they are far closer to one another than one might think.

They caused themselves (and their businesses) so much damage just to be able to hinder the other. Imagine hating someone so much you want to make their life that much more difficult and will even shoot yourself in the foot for it. That in itself is so sexually and emotionally charged.. like she really means so much to you that you’d damage yourself just so she suffers too?? If that isn’t the gayest thing you ever heard then idk anymore.

The tension that comes from hating one another so severely and trying to continuously make life harder for the other person can so easily slip into something more sexually charged that you cannot convince me that during a specifically heated argument the sexual tension didn’t become too much for them. So they snapped and just let it all out. It was definitely rough and not pretty, I’m talking clashing teeth, fighting to have the upper hand (I believe Helena ends up winning) and torn up clothes. It would truly bring out their most feral side and any composure and grace they previously held goes out the window.

And once the dam broke the first time well.. let’s just say whenever life got too much and they needed to take it out on someone… their arguments turned into something more carnal.

Now let’s talk about Face to Face because that song is gay as all hell. What do you mean you wonder about what her favourite perfume and artists are??? Like the way they’re singing about one another in this song is the reason I first was like “oh they fucked”.

At the beginning of the song Helena complains about how she’s always been attached to her ‘rival’ but they’ve attached themselves to each other, no one forced them to remain enemies or to continue being petty and make life harder for the other. They could have detached at any point.

Also how they suddenly wanna share their struggles with one another??? GAY!!! And how they suddenly admit that maybe the other person is possibly just as good as they are because why else would they be able to annoy them this much??? SAPPHICS!!!

Now onto stealing each other’s confidant… like there is something so petty and so gay about that like why on earth do you want the person that is closest to her by your side? Is it because you want to get under their skin so badly that you’ll do anything?? Is it because it’s a way to have her closer to you without being closer? Or do you want to gain more knowledge about her??? No matter the answer, the outcome is so fucking gay and most definitely leads to hate sex. Like what do you mean you stole her husband to have as your right hand man??? That is so utterly bizar and is such a messy lesbian move. What are you trying to get to know about her that you need her husband as your right hand man 🤨.

Beauty in the world + the entire finale is so fucking gay. It’s basically like “yeah only us two know about when there was true beauty in the world” and like “we should just stay enemies for business” HELLO??? “Our secret” EXCUSE ME???. Maybe we helped the other survive/thrive??? What kind of gay ass shit????? Helena asking Elizabeth her opinion on her lipstick. The way Helena looks at Elizabeth when she sings “Eyes that glittered like a gem. The lovers we bewitched with them.” They definitely fucked.

“Strange with you I see it all again like new. A glimpse of beauty in the world.” SORRY??? I DON’T THINK ANYONE HAS EVER SAID ANYTHING AS ROMANTIC TO ME AS THIS.

The way they look back so fondly on their rivalry.. it really was a way to cope and survive and blow off steam and you cannot convince me that they didn’t hate fuck to help with that.

After that encounter they had sex one last time and for the first time it wasn’t purely hate filled but there was some softness and fondness there.

And lastly THE WAY HELENA APPLIES ELIZABETH’S LIPSTICK IN beauty in the world. LIKE THE WAY SHE SO GENTLY WIPES IT AWAY THEN APPLIES IT AGAIN?? The first time I saw that I nearly screamed and died. If that moment can’t convince you that they slept together then nothing can.

That’s it’s for now. I wanted to add more clips as proof etc but I can only add one sooo I chose this one

(This rant was inspired by a reaction from @yourbasicqueerie)

[4lexnilsen]

“that’s what it was,  yeah…”   alex absently agrees,  nodding his head and sucking on his still bleeding lip.   a fresh wave of guilt fills his heart and he hears himself saying,   “i think most people are just jealous of you.   you have everything,  helena.”   and it’s no excuse for bullying,  but in a way it is an explanation.   “i can only speak for myself and although i don’t see you as a rich,  entitled brat,  i am very much jealous of what you have.   and i’m not even talking about the money,  that doesn’t mean much to me.”   even though,  it must be nice to never worry about getting a job or wondering how you’re going to pay the rent.   “you were right about me.   i wish i had a dad like yours.   yours wants to give you the world while mine doesn’t even know when my birthday is.”   shoulders shrugging faintly underneath the puffer jacket like it’s no big deal,  eyes flickering back onto the road when they begin to sting.   “and so people attack your family or your upbringing because they’re jealous,  but believe me,  if given the opportunity,  they’d swap lives with you in a heartbeat.   you’re not a horrible person.”   he glances down at her hand lingering on his skin,  butterflies fluttering in the pit of his belly,  making him simultaneously nauseous and infatuated.      

“is that a hammer?   what were you planning to use it for?”   he laughs dryly,  somewhat amused by the contents of his friend’s pockets but still very much disgusted with himself.   but the mere memory of their very first meeting has his features softening,  a gentle smile tugging at the corners of his lips,  causing the wound to reopen.   not that it bothers him.   he feels so warm and tingly,  confused feelings brewing deep inside.   “you saved my life that day,  i’m not even kidding.”   maybe in a way he’s managed to pay his debt tonight by disarming harry.   “oh,  then i’ll get mine virgin,  too.   i’m not much of a drinker.   i’m actually pretty famous for always bringing a book to the bar.   that’s my thing.”   it’s very kind of her to offer him a ride back home,  but the bar that he has in mind is only a few blocks away from his apartment so there will be no need for that.   “yeah,  of course,”   he agrees,  focusing on driving and turning the radio on so that it can fill the silence between them.   katy perry’s old song is playing,  the one that got away,  and alex finds himself sinking his teeth into his busted lip to keep from getting emotional.   stupid song.   

they circle the block a few times before alex finds an open spot,  right outside the small corner bar that he’s been telling helena about.   its neon sign flickering half-heartedly,  but there are quite a few people inside.   this place is the opposite of that fancy lounge,  its patrons stink of vodka and cigarettes and don’t drive rolls royce,  but maybe that’s exactly what they need.   a change of scenery.   the black mustang pulls in,  barely fitting between two beat-up sedans.   “alright,  here we are,”   he mutters,  cutting the engine and unbuckling his belt before climbing out into the cool night.   he circles the car and opens helena’s door for her,  offering her a hand,  but doubting she’ll be willing to take it.   the air around them smells like wet concrete and distant food trucks,  but at least the hum of traffic has all but faded away.   inside the bar,  it’s warm and dim,  which alex figures works in their favor —   at least no one will ask questions about their faces.   does it look like they were in a domestic brawl?   probably.   he leads his friend over to the wooden bar,  helping her slide into a high stool.   shoulders brushing as he takes a seat beside her.   he orders them a round of some fruity beverages,  virgin.   and when the bartender places two glasses in front of them,  with sugar-dusted rims,  he doesn’t even realize the guy didn’t hear the last part.   there’s rum in their strawberry daiquiris,  but as he takes a sip,  he can’t really tell a difference.   “so…   what a night,  right?”

"i've took a lot of self defense classes and such, but i don't think that was it. i think that was just anger talking, i just had enough of being called a rich entitled bitch. like i'm some horrible person for things out of my control, i can't help who i was born to." another curse word she'll repent for. but remnants of anger are still left soaring through her, when you have been judged for it your entire life you finally realize you're not going to take it so lightly anymore. "no." she answers, she doesn't know who she is. but she's guessing she's someone who frequents the lounge looking for what she got tonight... or was. since she's sure she and alex have ruined their mood.

dumping her pockets of all the tools she had them filled with... screw driver, taser, mini hammer, phone. head turns towards him when his fingers touch her cheek, setting off an unwanted spark to burn beneath her chest. "i do have one." a first-aid kit, that's always a number one thing to have. "ever since you needed a walgreens trip, i've been inspired to keep one." helena would laugh, almost there with the start of a smile at the fond memory, until the said memory fades along with the smile that was just beginning to bloom across her face with ache because that was before everything he said to her tonight that's made her view him as a different person. words are not quickly forgotten, unfortunately. and now everything's tainted. even her favorite memories of him.

"let's go there, then. i'll get mine virgin though." not telling him it's because she's never drunk before, he'll make fun of her for it. "you'll need someone sober to drive you afterwards." she claims, pretending the tears stinging her eyes isn't because of the memories being tainted. blaming it on the cut across her jaw. "watch the road, i'll be okay." fingers gently wrap around his hand, slowly removing it from her face even her touch lingers a little extra longer against his skin before letting go completely.