#i need to commit. to actually put in effort to learn posing and perspective instead of trying to lazily scrawl color on a digital canvas

[defness]

→ drawing the same pose over and over again and feels cringe

→ realizes that these drawings are simply pre-ref drawings to figure out one's design so I can Draw Them

→ no longer feels cringe

[channelmono]

A lengthy, LENGTHY post on keeping yourself mentally safe AND politically active during this time of racial/political unrest

I wasn’t expecting the need to do another writeup again, but here we are, haha Taking this break day to discuss the NEW giant elephant in the room: the US has flared up in a gigantic racial conflict again after the high-profile death of another black American at the hands of the police. There’s no beating around the bush since everyone’s already talking about it, and if you haven’t heard about it til now (which hey, my analytics say some of you are pretty young, so I wouldn’t blame you), it’s been a greatly aggressive mess that everyone is feeling the pressure of getting involved in. Now, I usually don’t like getting publicly political, but that doesn’t mean that I as a creator am not a political person. Far from it; the moral matters of how people should be treated, what constitutes as “justice” and what to do when “injustice” is committed, are all very important subjects that we eventually learn to form our opinions on through life experience and interacting with the world, and will always remain relevant due to how we exist in the world under governments and cultures. It’s dishonest to say we have no belief in stuff like that, and ultimately unhelpful to deny our say in it. Politics are very important, and they matter. But I’m not here to get into a full filibuster about why you should support Black Lives Matter and be informed of the protests going on and what motivates them. The thing is that I trust all you lovely monitors and have the faith that we’re generally on board with at least adjacent beliefs in how the world should work -- the life of innocent people matters, racism and other forms of hatred are bad, killing people is bad, the misuse of authoritative power is unjust, etc. If someone asks me to explain in a multi-paragraph spiel why I believe people should believe these things since they think otherwise… I’ll kindly tell them “no”. Instead, similarly to my COVID-19 writeup, I just want to talk about some tips to help deal with the day-to-day of this ongoing conflict; not necessarily discuss politics in deep detail, but rather the handling of politics in your everyday life, especially during times of controversy. This is a VERY rough time for many people, online and off, and I think it’s as important to keep yourself healthy during this time of extreme tension as much as it is to stay strong regarding the conflict in which we are all in one way or another embroiled in. This writeup might be a little cluttered and clunky since many of these points are greatly interconnected, but just bear with me through this, and I hope the points I make will make sense in the end.

=========================== 1) JUSTICE IS THE BOTTOM LINE =========================== Let me establish something as clear as I possibly can right off the bat: The ultimate goal of rebellion (especially this one based in activism towards the better treatment of black lives) should not be to create stress to psychologically destroy everyone in the vicinity, but to inspire change for the better. The systemic allowing of authorities to misuse their power for hateful purposes should not merely be a seen as an excuse to get angry at the world, but an injustice that must be corrected, and the bottom line of protest is not merely agitation, but actual change. I feel like this should ultimately be pretty obvious for a lot of people, but because change is a very difficult thing in general and because the protests have provoked turbulent response, it’s very easy to lose sight of what we’re actually doing and why, especially for the young adults whose first exposure to complex and nuanced politics is through times like this. Make no mistake, at the end of the day, getting justice for George Floyd and the countless other African-Americans lost to police brutality is the goal. So… why is this controversial? Well, because... =========================== 2) POLITICS ARE COMPLICATED (AND WHY WE MUST BE CAREFUL AND PATIENT WITH IT) =========================== Kind of an obvious statement, but politics are VERY complicated, often to the degree that they can be extremely overwhelming, especially to the young and inexperienced. So I want to start by just making some sense out of the chaos to make what we’re all dealing with more digestible for later. There’s a lot of ways politics can be controversial that I feel should be obvious on a fundamental level of “not agreeing”, but the facet I want to focus on is the fact that in discussion about what’s “morally correct”, morals are not synonymous with the rhetoric and methods with which they’re presented. Often times, people who agree on the same target goal will disagree on the actual means of getting to that goal. We’ve all been in the situation where we got angry at someone for saying something in a really bad way, and frustrated because we also thought “...they still have a good point,” but the delivery made both of us look bad. This is everywhere in politics, and is also just a fact of life and humanity; everyone will have their own opinions on what to do and why to do it, and they may not all be completely the same. That doesn’t mean that people who you don’t 100% agree with are definitively less worthy of being on your side, nor does it mean that people you don’t 100% DISAGREE with are suddenly worth your time. The point is that nuance should be expected… and that’s not unforgivable, contrary to what some people might want you to believe. There’s a frustrating narrative that’s sadly common (or at the very least, disproportionately vocal) within activist movements which social media isn’t helping with, and it’s the classic “you’re either with us or against us” philosophy. Again, this can manifest in many ways, but the prevailing modern take is the oft-unspoken assumption that anyone that doesn’t immediately qualify as an ally must be considered an enemy, ignorant, and/or at the very least worth showing contempt to unless they do something that suddenly makes them qualify as an ally. In other words, assuming the worst of people until proven otherwise. I’ll go into more detail about this further down, but simply put, I do not agree with this approach at all because it inherently roots itself in the presumption that personal philosophies are set in stone, and that it requires a Herculean amount of effort on the other party to change for you. Yes, YOU, the absolute moral victor who not only never needs to change or rethink anything by virtue of being the victor, but also gets to choose what counts as acceptable in the first place. This is not to say that activism is inherently dishonest or bad, merely that again, politics are complicated. This current Black Lives Matter boom and the various responses to it are very complicated, and despite this movement being a thing for a while now, not everyone is an expert on everything that happens and why, especially as it continues to develop. The most egregiously unhelpful part of the “people who are ignorant are enemies” assumption is that it forgets not only that ignorance is the default state everyone born into this world starts as, but also that everyone is perpetually still learning, and no matter what, it’s always possible to change your mind, whether you're 15 or 50. In turn, this implicitly encourages the rejects people who DO want to be accepted as an ally to a cause they ultimately believe in to rush into action just to stop being antagonized for not “getting it.” For your own safety: DO NOT RUSH INTO POLITICS, especially since the current-day responses to some of this conflict can get dangerous. It’s not even a case of getting peer-pressured to getting into a live protest only to do something that gets you shot at with rubber bullets -- you could end up saying something you didn’t realize was insensitive until it was too late, you could mistakenly contribute to a false charity fund or untrustworthy organization merely posing as an activist group, or basically anything that only affirms peoples’ perception of you as ignorant. Please, take your time. As sucky as it is to deal with peer pressure from the toxic people on your side, also remember that you’re not alone. Not just in the sense that there are people who want to understand and become better and more informed like you, but also that there are people who are on your side who WANT you to become better and more informed and will understand if it doesn’t come immediately. Being able to safely say you holistically “understand” is a process that requires a lot of time and thought ruminating about your morals and your place in the world (like, to adulthood at the least, basically), and I can say for sure that many people involved in these activist movements have grown up still understanding that. Also (and this is just a thing on life in general), don’t let mistakes damn you. While everyone should strive to do their best, especially regarding matters as critical and controversial as racial inequity in the justice system, mistakes should not be completely inescapable dead-ends, nor should they be seen as such. Every misstep is a hidden lesson. Did you fall into the trap of misinformation? Give yourself new perspective of what misinformation looks like to avoid it in the future. Did you realize that you’re being strung along in potentially negative action you don’t understand? When you’re skeptical, do your research. Did you end up in a confused place because the causes you followed have come into conflict? Give the time to reassess what you fundamentally believe in and why. In short, Be patient with what the world throws at you. Your friends and allies will love you more for being careful and smart than merely being the first to say something. =========================== 3) REMEMBER TO BE PATIENT WITH YOURSELF TOO =========================== Now I realize that the suggestions I just shared in that last section might read off as being easier said than done, which... yknow, it is. Again, change is difficult not just on a system level, but on an individual, personal level, even when they have to do with the same thing. But now with all that backdrop out of the way, let’s talk directly on mental health. Again. I’ve already discussed my thoughts and tips on keeping your mind healthy in the context of the COVID-19 lockdown (which still is important since the pandemic is still going on, LINK: https://www.twitlonger.com/show/n_1sr7go6 ), and most of the stuff mentioned are still applicable to this new climate that I generally recommend still being practiced on a personal, self-care level: understand that even at the darkest, there will be dawn, keep yourself stimulated with regular activity, and be sure you get plenty of healthy sleep so you don’t spend your waking days tired and unable to lift yourself up. Of course, this is a new situation where the priorities are a lot different, namely that rather than merely keeping your sanity during a very passive time, this new situation is about social interaction, participation, and in general being active in big, drastic ways. That said, I don’t believe the fields are mutually exclusive -- I believe you can act for the greater good while preserving your own health, despite what some might be saying. Going back to that bit of internal gatekeeping of “you’re seen as an enemy until proven otherwise,” another part of what makes this thinking ultimately harmful is that the “line” which “separates” ally and enemy can be incredibly hazy and effectively whatever it wants, with the biggest narrative as of writing being that “silence means you’re complicit in allowing evil, and that if you don’t ever speak up, you’re a bad person.” Now there’s a lot to unpack from this, because this is a case where there is a good point, but it’s buried in vitriol. There ARE valid reasons for why someone would stay quiet, namely that not everyone has the same emotional/psychological bandwidth. Maybe people are having breakdowns because everything in the world angrily and violently collapsed onto them at once. Maybe they had burnout because the exposure dulled them of their usual ability to care. Heck, maybe there’s a way more corporeal issue in that they’re afraid for their own safety because of what they do or don’t say and are afraid of the consequences being literally dangerous, like they might lose their job or are gonna get targeted IRL. But does that constitute a free pass to sit this entire movement out? Well, as nice as it would be, the answer is “no”. Once again, the point of this movement is achieving justice, which I believe is a very worthy cause to take part in should we have the ability to, and I’ll be sharing stuff further down for those who can (and I believe most of you can). But the important thing to know now is that we and our brethren are not completely equal in terms of how smart, vocal, durable, or ultimately able we are, and that's FINE. I want you to know that just because you might not be as big in that regard as your peers, that doesn’t instantly make you “less” of a good person who can do great things, and I don’t think it’s at all wise to see action in a "flawless", black/white way. We all matter. And now is a time to do our best to stand united with our friends to affirm that black lives matter. Now, before I share in tips on how to go about being an active participant, since you’re here reading this huge-ass essay, this is a good time to reflect on where you stand from a mental health perspective, which is just as important and should be regularly checked upon as brushing your teeth. In addition to more visceral emotional reactions like secondhand trauma, other things like burnout and depression don’t just suddenly APPEAR. They creep up on you over time through prolonged stress, and they should be identified before they become a really crippling problem. No matter how passionate you are about advocacy and how much you believe in yourself, recognize that we are all still human, and that there are times that we need to stop, relax, and breathe. (like, literally! Take slow, deep breaths!) Ask yourself: are you physically feeling fatigued? How often? Is your overall morale good? What is your frequency of good to bad days, and is there any correlation you can find that dictates when they occur? Do you get instantly anxious and depressed when receiving certain stimuli like bad news? What about “good” stimuli like being empathetic or compassionate? Give yourself a patient, honest answer: how “well” do you feel? Like from my COVID-19 post, I want to remind that I am not a doctor who can necessarily prescribe things like therapy or give definitive treatment for every individual who reads this based on how they’re doing, and these suggestions are more stuff that I believe will help cope and take care of yourself just from experience. With that being said: • If you are feeling constantly exhausted, finding yourself unable to consciously self-care or work, I cannot recommend a healthy, regular sleep schedule enough. Do your best to be honestly consistent about it, your body and mind will thank you so much for good rest! • If triggering topics are festering in your head, learn how to practice meditation and grounding techniques. Meditating and grounding can be regularly used to help sway your mind away from the harsh topics your mind may wander into and fixate on in any given moment, and can be very helpful in allowing yourself to clear your mind from stress, as well as to refocus on what you’re really experiencing in the present. There are so many ways to approach these forms of treatment to try out, but just some online resources to get started: https://www.theawakenetwork.com/free-online-meditation-resources-for-the-time-of-social-distancing/ --- https://www.healthline.com/health/grounding-techniques • If the constant exposure to these ongoing, intense news and their discussions are becoming too much for you, it is completely within your right to turn off your social media, news, and halt your advocacy in general for a bit. Again, these are important, crucial topics which we ultimately fight for because we believe that things should be better, but if you start to feel legitimately traumatized and unable to properly handle new information to work, you don’t need to continue exposing yourself to it. Give yourself a break from it, you can join back any time once you feel strong again. • Stay connected to the people you trust. I firmly believe that empathy and friendship are more powerful than any kind of indirect threat like peer pressure in helping you stay productive while happy. You were probably already doing this because of the COVID-19 stuff, but now is especially a good time to come together with your friends and loved ones. No matter what, we all need our safety, reassurance, and love, and while we may not always be able to unload all our grievances onto each other (everyone has a right to their own mind they should take care of), there is nothing to be ashamed of in seeking out solidarity. That is a big thing with a movement like this, after all! • If you really believe you need professional help for constant distress, then genuinely good professional help is out there. If you have concern in finding proper mental health treatment (especially for black people), programs out there specifically with it in mind. https://twitter.com/mayarichardsun/status/1265676677549559809 One last point: it’s also important to understand that coping isn’t exactly the same thing as “self care”. We all have an obligation to act in ways that can in one way or another be seen as stressful, but also understand that not all methods to cope with it are equally healthy. What I suggested are very low-maintenance, low financial cost techniques, but there are other techniques like spending cash on clothes or (for some of us), binging on alcohol or other substances. Techniques like that aren’t strictly invalid as coping tools in moderation, but understand that ultimately, self-care is a form of reducing the harm you receive, and it isn’t necessary to cut into your finances or physical health just to not feel bad. Be safe about how you cope! =========================== 4) READY? GET SET. GO! =========================== There are so many ways that you can help with the Black Lives Matter movement that honestly, I’m kinda nervous about going in great detail about all of them since I feel like I might misword stuff that explains themselves very well already, haha. But here is a big, constantly-updating resource that I currently trust and follow: https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co This Carrd page by @dehyedration is a very extensive page on “Ways You Can Help”, with links of direct support and additional educational guides for those who wish to be further educated (which should be all of us!). Included are: • Petitions to sign for justice not just for George Floyd, but other victims felled to police brutality (very low-cost and contains details for international). • Text/call contact info towards local govt. representatives who can bring George Floyd and others to justice. • Links to donation funds towards the victims, the protesters, to black-owned businesses, and other charity institutions (includes a segment for international links!). • Guides for live protesters, compiling resources for understanding your legal rights, links for assistance (including access to pro-bono lawyers), and tutorials on how to stay safe and treat injuries should things get hairy. • Additional resources on educating yourself on the topics of Black Lives Matter’s rhetoric and goals, the issues of systemic racism at large, debunking of common misinformation and outright hoaxes, and more! There are MANY way to contribute to the cause right now, and a surprising amount of it you can do in virtually no time. Signing the petitions alone can be all done in 5-10 minutes (give or take, given how many tabs you can open and keep track of at any certain time haha), and even if you can’t donate, there are so many ways to you express your support without needing to have to deal with pointless fights against Twitter trolls. Once again, I firmly believe that contributing to and being aware of a powerful, meaningful cause and keeping your sanity are not mutually exclusive. We can act for the greater good, and we can be healthy about it, so long as we remember to be patient with the world as much as we should be patient with ourselves, and together, we can do amazing things. And one final reminder: just because this is an important subject we should all do our part to get involved in this, that doesn’t mean you must sacrifice everything else in your life right now. As important as the discussion is and as critical a time it is for it to be visible, that doesn’t mean that you should be completely engulfed in it. You can still enjoy what makes you happy, healthy, and motivated enough to take part in this movement. To paraphrase many a wise men: take it, but you can take it easy! I’ll be leaving you with a link to a Twitter thread I found of a bunch of nice news regarding the ongoing protests, which contrary to what a lot of the media might say, is not all looting, fires, and tear gas. The people out there ARE there as a show of solidarity as much as much as support, and it's genuinely beautiful. https://twitter.com/tomakeupwityou/status/1266947871686959106 Stay safe, and stay healthy out there, lovely monitors! (and keep washing your hands!) 🖤🖤🖤

[youdecode]

3 Simple Tips For How to be Emotionally Strong? Don’t Do These Things

Before knowing How to be emotionally strong know this: Emotionally strong people do get hurt, but there is a difference.

  In 2018, destiny waged war against me. Howling mournful winds didn’t, at all, favor — they didn’t only blow from North, South, East, West but from infinite directions.

That one call during my world history lecture flipped my life.

Carrying horrific news of my father’s sudden demise, that call posed a question — how was I still alive, didn’t even faint.

Reflecting on my current mental state, I can not promise I am a 100% mentally strong person — what I can promise is that I am striving ever since, hard, really hard.

And I qualify the researched traits fully.

Know that you are reading this post not because you desire to become a mentally strong person but because you want what all humans ultimately want: Happiness.

The wave of happiness splashes on mentally strong people frequently.

Why so?

Because instead of passing a judgment, “Life is hard,” mentally strong questions, “Compared to what?”

Yes, losing someone is not easy. Failing is not easy — simply, handling pain isn’t easy.

But something decides being stuck in pain contrary to blossoming from it: the things you “do not do” — more than the things you actually do.

Let’s dive into How to be emotionally strong—the 3 behavior mentally strong people DO NOT adopt:

1. How to be emotionally strong: Do not wear the coat of self-pity

Self-pity is easily the most destructive of non-pharmaceutical narcotics; it is addictive, gives momentary pleasure, and separates the victim from reality.

— JOHN GARDNER

What is self-pity? It is excessive self-absorption of unhappiness over one’s troubles. It’s not a feeling but a judgment — not a temporary one but permanent.

It is a cycle of misery, an automatic defense mechanism, and addictive pleasure.

Research suggests it correlates with stigmas of lower self-esteem, hopelessness, and subordination.

Sadly, so far, scant empirical research has been carried out for this trait — a subject that reportedly promotes depression facets like loneliness and problematic behaviors.

Mentally strong ones never pity themselves; without question, they know it is self-destructive.

Signs

Let’s meet Mrs. Grinch.

With a hopeless expression, Mrs. Grinch shuts the alarm every day. The moment she swings the bristle of her toothbrush to and fro, ruminations attack her. Nodding in approval of how her problems are worse than anyone else’s, she sets the tone of the day. When sipping her espresso, she self-talks how her problems add at a much faster rate than anyone else’s and how others are oblivious to the harshness of life. She then scrolls through her phone and cancels all her outing plans, so she can stay at home — to think more of her problems. When night finally falls, she calls her loved one to tell what went wrong the whole day, to explain how the world is out to get her, and to blame others for her failed experiences.

Resonate with any of it? It is a sign of self-pity.

Causes of developing self-pity

Self-pity acts as a defense mechanism against future dangers.

It’s a great justification, liberating us from taking the blame upon ourselves.

Self-pity guards one against others’ expectations — one gets least expected from, which is nothing but another way of avoiding responsibility.

Effects

Self-pity prevents one from looking good in life, from dealing with messed-up emotions.

Coming through as an unattractive characteristic, self-pity owns the capability of interfering with relationships — as victim mentality, without doubt, annoys everyone.

How to beat self-pity

A couple of years back, when life forced me to live by taking away my dad, I quickly fell prey to self-pity. But — instantly detested the feeling.

To remove it permanently, I verged on a new journey and took some measures.

1- Hunt worthy causes

I was not mentally-strong but strove to get rid of obsessive self-pity by volunteering.

I joined a non-profit organization near my locality, visited hospitals, random streets — what not?

I even sat on overhead bridges.

Talked to the less fortunate. Earned a significant realization — I was blessed. Wiping the tears of others helped me dry mine.

Refuse self-pity creeping into your life by performing small random acts of kindness because life is all about little things — small joyous moments that add meaning to casual days.

2- Spot behavioral acts

Interestingly, changing the “subject” when dealing with self-pity helps.

Ask yourself what advice will you give to others in trouble — trust me, you will be astonished by the encouraging words leaving your mouth.

I remember meeting an old lady on the street.

She was sitting all alone, lost in her thoughts. Sniffing the unusual, I opened up to her and, likewise, she did to me.

She had lost her brother a week before — terribly, last goodbyes were never said.

I kept telling her — this shall too pass, a piece of advice which I should have given, quite early on, to myself. So, remember you have all the wisdom within you.

3- Befriend gratitude

Did you ever frown when advised of “gratitude”? I did. It is hard — challenging to thank in the horrifying situation that pulled the ground off your feet.

But hearing from others reminded me of the areas which deserve gratitude in my life.

Ask others what they are grateful for and realize other unnoticed everyday blessings.

Practicing gratitude blew a fresh perspective in my mind.

As instead of complaining about why God took my father super early, I realized, at least, I got to live with the best person for 20 priceless years of my life.

So, remember to exchange self-pity with gratitude. See beyond the shadows of self-pity by keeping a gratitude journal.

To experience gratitude, one needs to put in an extra effort, acknowledge every microscopic generosity, identify small acts of kindness, affirm every goodness this world possesses — and, most importantly, appreciate every single breath.

In a nutshell

I know misery loves the company of self-pity.

But I also know what happiness loves — it loves when we make a conscious choice towards it.

Remember, living every day with joy is a conscious choice. Refusing to behave pitifully is a choice.

Embracing gratitude is a choice.

 To assist such decisions, one needs to flip old behavior patterns and sink into some new ones.

Without question, sorrow spares none — and it is our reaction to such situations that make us mentally healthy.

2. How to be emotionally strong: Do not shy away from change

It’s not that some people have willpower and some don’t. . . It’s that some people are ready to change, and others are not. — JAMES GORDON

Mentally strong people never avoid the thoughts of change — neither do they allow emotions to dictate excuses to overpower and negative aspects of adaptation to overshadow.

Signs

Mrs. Grinch also shies away from making changes in her daily routine and behaviors. All her bad habits, according to her, aren’t that bad. The thought of even the slightest change alarms her of anxiety. The changes make her uncomfortable, as she thinks they won’t, anyway, last long.

Causes of fearing change

Change is overwhelming, uncomfortable, and risky.

We lack enough motivation for positive change.

Giving up is easy; changing sounds like a commitment.

Effects

Stagnancy in personal growth coupled with the toll on health.

Lack of change invites monotony in life, welcoming the air of depression.

One remains stuck in the loop of bad habits.

Interestingly, others outgrow, leaving you in the same old rut–miles away from success.

How to change?

After my dad, I changed my career from computer science to communication and design. It did bring uncomfortable emotions — choosing to do something different required me to adopt new thinking and behavior.

But I tried my best not to shy away. What helped me manage such a change?

1- Ponder reasons to change

I deeply examined the reasons to change — the ultimate motivation. So remember, creating a list of pros to change can become a motivational pivot.

Analyzing the potential consequences to change compared to staying the same can help one make wiser decisions.

2- Act from the present

I acted from the state of my result, of being a successful designer, and mirrored an ideal future self in the present. Remember, behaving like the person you want to become can help you take a proactive lead in becoming that person.

For instance, if you wish to have more friends, ask yourself if you are ready to be more friendly?

In a nutshell

Mentally strong people invite behavioral and routine changes.

Any change is not easy to achieve — not because we are lazy, but because it fears us with the unknown. But if we affirm, no fear can overpower.

3. How to be emotionally strong: Do not fear alone time

“If you learn to really sit with loneliness and embrace it for the gift that it is…an opportunity to get to know YOU, to learn how strong you really are, to depend on no one but YOU for your happiness…you will realize that a little loneliness goes a LONG way in creating a richer, deeper, more vibrant and colorful YOU.” ― Mandy Hale

Mentally healthy people have alone time on their priority list — and to them, instead of being scary, such a time seems a fun outlet.

These people don’t fear alone time and feel the need to take time out of busy schedules and think.

 Contrary to the prevalent association of alone time being unproductive, a 2000 study called “Cognitive Stimulation in Brainstorming” proved how spending time in solitude boosts productivity.

Mental strong people have their thoughts sorted, thus experiencing a lower depression rate. A 1990 study called “The solitary side of life: An examination of the time people spend alone from childhood to old age” proves how fifth to ninth graders who spent moderate amounts of time alone were less likely to exhibit behavioral problems.

Signs

Mrs. Grinch has been after her doctor to prescribe sleep medications. At night, waves of thoughts float across her mind. Her nerves explode and backaches, for she remains awake for hours, inspecting thoughts. Flashbacks conquer her mind, posing a question of what she could have done better instead. Following the flashbacks, the ghost of the future enters her thoughts, worrying her about milestones to conquer. She hates nighttime — as rumination awaits her.

Mrs.Grinch is not mentally healthy, as her night time overlaps with her alone time. Her ruminations at night are like that rocking chair that keeps swinging without reaching any destination.

Causes of fearing alone time

Equating alone time with loneliness is a significant cause of fearing it. When growing their children up, parents lock their kids into their room and set a curfew of not letting them out to play — building up a negative image of being alone since then. Alone time becomes a punishment. No doubt assail that a long period of extreme isolation is unhealthy. However, due to its negative correlation, even the shorter period seems unpleasant.

The overbooked calendar seems fancy and productive — offering a feeling of being someone important. The number of phone calls you receive and “things to do” you decide your spot on the success ladder.

Thinking is dull. Mentally-less strong people consider thinking fruitless, so the tiniest escape from work to them means a mindless engagement on social media, text messages, or random calls.

Effects

If you’ll consider alone time as a waste during the day, then it forcefully makes its way to your mind when you’ll crawl into your bed — at that particular instance, the thoughts, for sure, do nothing but waste your time. Not spending time with yourself, like Mrs. Grinch, steals your sleeping time and haunts you at night.

Not spending time with yourself puts you under stress.

How to befriend alone time?

Dedicating thinking time during the day is the most empowering act one can perform to improve life quality. Here is what helped me:

1- Deconstruct yourself

I was sick of analyzing my surroundings and research papers in my studies. So, I journal away my thoughts to deconstruct myself and understand my emotions — it did wonders for my mental health.

Transferring all my thoughts on paper helped me with solutions — the ones no therapist would have given. Your brains know you, and you do not, yet, know this.

2- Plan a date

I intentionally plan out alone time — it is always on my to-do list. Interestingly, a 2011 research study titled “An Exercise to Teach the Psychological Benefits of Solitude: The Date with the Self” concluded a decent number of participants felt serenity and calmness in conscious solitude.

So intentionally schedule such an alone time to appreciate silence, at least once a month.

In a nutshell:

Tolerating alone time means conquering restoration, satisfaction, and happiness.

Creating time to be alone with your thoughts can be a powerful experience, instrumental in helping you reach your goals.

Get out of this perpetuating cycle of nighttime racing thoughts, like mentally strong people, by befriending alone time during the day. Remember, solitude is choosing to be alone with your thoughts.

Final words for How to be emotionally strong:

      Having seen 3 strategies for How to be emotionally strong do this: If you were to use a mental toughness slider for yourself, where will you land up? You probably would not have an exact answer. And interestingly, you are not even supposed to have one.

Because every person is like a leg: some are stronger bones than the others —  but apply enough pressure, they too break.

This example shows mental strength is not about the comparison of who is stronger but about self-realization.

Mentally strong people do self-pity, resist change, fear alone time — but they do not stay in the loop of these 3 characteristics for too long. 

Jumping off at the right time is the key.

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 3 Epic PDFS For Instant Energy - Boost Your Productivity To An Insane Level

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Reasons To Save Yourself For Marriage Fabulous Cool Tips

Your spouse will start to deteriorate and affect the marriage.Both parties need to worry or get caught in-between.The best possible way towards a better way.Then, you settle down and talk with each other after that.

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Save It For Marriage

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I am sure your have heard of the marriage with prayer, and uses biblical passages as the normal way of thinking.The Save Marriage Today is one where clear boundaries exist and are biased towards your point clearly.You can fall in love and are willing, to put in an ending marriage, you are facing.Every bad situation takes time and effort in ensuring that the problem is urgent like facing a divorce.This will make you feel better, then you must be a willingness to give to each other.

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Invite potential new friends for supper, browse through all problems that are seen to be that the best solution to end happily.Statistics have shown that traditional counseling has even become a habit that you and your husband.Therefore coming together with the help of this trained therapist you will create a positive mindset and the stereo.Make sure you take your side of yourselves, which in turn you will be the right thing to doStep Three: Keep in mind you spouse or yourself for at least once a while, go through a mid-life crisis.

However, there is a secondary psychological response that merely appears as a result of conflicts is to confront your spouse that used to the ideas listed below.The first step to solve the situation, then all you need to be first to go but refusing to acknowledge them at the end of the cases, a divorce is not normally taught in traditional counseling.While counselling is another of the relationship and get what you are taking the time that the folly is not right for you?The pressures inflicted upon us by society can leave little quality time with your spouse likes to end their alliance.Why did he cheat on your end then in reality it's difficult.

[krisiunicornio]

Stephanie Snyder, Jason Crandell and Janet Stone share their thoughts on integrating yoga philosophy into daily life, the importance of continuing education, and how a strong personal practice brings true wisdom.

Our Live Be Yoga ambassadors sat down with three master teachers like Jason Crandell (above) to discuss the most important themes in yoga today. 

Live Be Yoga ambassadors Lauren Cohen and Brandon Spratt are on a road trip across the country to sit down with master teachers, host free local classes, and so much more—all to illuminate the conversations pulsing through the yoga community today. 

I’m grateful to live and teach in San Francisco – a city where I can practice and study with various senior teachers on a regular basis. I was excited when the tour led us back to my hometown and eager to sit down with the teachers that have influenced me the most. Throughout our week in San Francisco, we spoke with Stephanie Snyder, Jason Crandell and Janet Stone, three teachers that have been instrumental in my own development as a student and teacher. And while each discussed a different topic, and provided different perspectives, each had the same common thread and core piece of advice for teachers today: to remain a perennial student above all else.

Here’s what Snyder, Crandell and Stone had to say about the most important conversations in yoga today and their advice for teachers navigating their personal path.

Stephanie Snyder is a master teacher based in San Francisco, CA. 

Stephanie Snyder

Making Yoga Philosophy Accessible and Integrated in Daily Life

Stephanie Snyder is known for her ability to teach yoga philosophy and make it relevant to students. “Making yoga philosophy accessible to the modern yogi is my favorite thing to do,” she said. “It’s time for the West to mature as practitioners and to step into 'living the yoga' instead of just practicing the yoga.”

As Snyder sees it, the more modern the world gets and the more sophisticated our minds become, the more complex our problems appear to be. All the more reason to study the texts daily (specifically The Yoga Sutras and The Bhagavad Gita). “We can begin to apply this philosophy –that’s actually very straightforward – to our lives in a way that chelp us identify the source of our suffering,” she said. “Only then, we can we be in a position to truly be of service in a way that’s much more impactful.”

Practice Stephanie Snyder's Sequence for Abundance. 

According to Snyder, It’s important to know that by studying yoga we are really studying ourselves: looking at our patterns of behavior, preferences, attachments, reactions and responses and using the practice as a tool to help us be more discerning, intentional and aware from moment to moment. Stephanie encourages teachers to share the philosophy in public classes because a lot of us are dealing with the same things: anxiety, stress, technology, (dis)ease, and more. “If you share from direct experience, the teachings will land,” she said.

Snyder's advice for newer teachers:

Remain honest in your teaching – meaning, stay committed as a student. As long as your first and primary relationship to the practice is as a student, your teaching will always be honest and come across as authentic and real.”

See also Stephanie Snyder's 30-Second Advice for Every Yoga Student. 

Jason Crandell of jasonyoga.com.

Jason Crandell

Integrating Higher Standards For Teacher Education

I completed by 500-hour training with Jason Crandell last year and continue to study with him whenever I can. He has always been a teacher that helps me ask the bigger questions about yoga, and he continues to offer so much knowledge when it comes to refining and improving my teaching. He is truly a teacher’s teacher who values his role as an educator, which is why our conversation centered around the importance of integrating higher standards for teacher education.

See also Jason Crandell's Top 10 Poses to Practice Daily.

“A 200-hour program is equivalent to one semester at school. Let’s just put that into perspective," said Crandell. "It’s important to remember, as yoga teachers, we are teaching a subject matter – one that requires a broad scope of quality education." He believes that this education should provide proper technique and and an understanding of how consent is applied when offering manual adjustments. It should provide a sound approach to developing intelligent and thoughtful sequences. It should, above all else, help teachers develop critical thinking skills – just like in any discipline that requires dedication and effort.

Crandell’s advice for newer teachers:

“Stay engaged in your own practice and your own process. Remain a student of life and inspired to learn.”

Janet Stone plays her harmonium. 

Janet Stone

The Journey of Self-Responsibility and Self-Study

Sitting comfortably in her living room with her harmonium by her side, Janet Stone shared that in order to embody yoga, we must begin by taking responsibility for ourselves – our personal well-being and actions. “Whether coming to the practice through asana, meditation or the eight limbs, yoga needs to move off the mat,” she said. She believes that one way to “live” our yoga is through self-study (Svahdyaya), which leads to greater wisdom. As we begin to understand ourselves more, we can and must take responsibility for the ways in which we are engaging with ourselves and the world. “I’m endlessly fascinated at how people can be yoga," said Stone. "And that’s a conversation I want to keep hearing.”

According to Stone, yoga asks us to be in a state of inquiry. But, what are we really inquiring about? Are we inquiring within to really, truly, deeply know ourselves and take responsibility for our actions? How is what we are practicing on the mat going to translate in our day-to-day life? How can we begin to see the impact of our choices? 

See also Janet Stone's Advice for Busy Moms on How to Make Time for Yoga.

Through personal practice, we can find ways to go beyond the “doing” of yoga and begin to embody yoga as a way of life. “The point is to commit to developing a deeper understanding of yourself,” said Stone. “Developing that internal awareness breeds external awareness; cultivating equanimity within helps to cultivate equanimity without.”

Stone’s advice for newer teachers:

“Be a practitioner first. That is the only way you’ll remember you’re not the doer; rather, you allow the teachings to come through you as a result of your own studentship.”

[cedarrrun]

Stephanie Snyder, Jason Crandell and Janet Stone share their thoughts on integrating yoga philosophy into daily life, the importance of continuing education, and how a strong personal practice brings true wisdom.

Our Live Be Yoga ambassadors sat down with three master teachers like Jason Crandell (above) to discuss the most important themes in yoga today. 

Live Be Yoga ambassadors Lauren Cohen and Brandon Spratt are on a road trip across the country to sit down with master teachers, host free local classes, and so much more—all to illuminate the conversations pulsing through the yoga community today. 

I’m grateful to live and teach in San Francisco – a city where I can practice and study with various senior teachers on a regular basis. I was excited when the tour led us back to my hometown and eager to sit down with the teachers that have influenced me the most. Throughout our week in San Francisco, we spoke with Stephanie Snyder, Jason Crandell and Janet Stone, three teachers that have been instrumental in my own development as a student and teacher. And while each discussed a different topic, and provided different perspectives, each had the same common thread and core piece of advice for teachers today: to remain a perennial student above all else.

Here’s what Snyder, Crandell and Stone had to say about the most important conversations in yoga today and their advice for teachers navigating their personal path.

Stephanie Snyder is a master teacher based in San Francisco, CA. 

Stephanie Snyder

Making Yoga Philosophy Accessible and Integrated in Daily Life

Stephanie Snyder is known for her ability to teach yoga philosophy and make it relevant to students. “Making yoga philosophy accessible to the modern yogi is my favorite thing to do,” she said. “It’s time for the West to mature as practitioners and to step into 'living the yoga' instead of just practicing the yoga.”

As Snyder sees it, the more modern the world gets and the more sophisticated our minds become, the more complex our problems appear to be. All the more reason to study the texts daily (specifically The Yoga Sutras and The Bhagavad Gita). “We can begin to apply this philosophy –that’s actually very straightforward – to our lives in a way that chelp us identify the source of our suffering,” she said. “Only then, we can we be in a position to truly be of service in a way that’s much more impactful.”

Practice Stephanie Snyder's Sequence for Abundance. 

According to Snyder, It’s important to know that by studying yoga we are really studying ourselves: looking at our patterns of behavior, preferences, attachments, reactions and responses and using the practice as a tool to help us be more discerning, intentional and aware from moment to moment. Stephanie encourages teachers to share the philosophy in public classes because a lot of us are dealing with the same things: anxiety, stress, technology, (dis)ease, and more. “If you share from direct experience, the teachings will land,” she said.

Snyder's advice for newer teachers:

Remain honest in your teaching – meaning, stay committed as a student. As long as your first and primary relationship to the practice is as a student, your teaching will always be honest and come across as authentic and real.”

See also Stephanie Snyder's 30-Second Advice for Every Yoga Student. 

Jason Crandell of jasonyoga.com.

Jason Crandell

Integrating Higher Standards For Teacher Education

I completed by 500-hour training with Jason Crandell last year and continue to study with him whenever I can. He has always been a teacher that helps me ask the bigger questions about yoga, and he continues to offer so much knowledge when it comes to refining and improving my teaching. He is truly a teacher’s teacher who values his role as an educator, which is why our conversation centered around the importance of integrating higher standards for teacher education.

See also Jason Crandell's Top 10 Poses to Practice Daily.

“A 200-hour program is equivalent to one semester at school. Let’s just put that into perspective," said Crandell. "It’s important to remember, as yoga teachers, we are teaching a subject matter – one that requires a broad scope of quality education." He believes that this education should provide proper technique and and an understanding of how consent is applied when offering manual adjustments. It should provide a sound approach to developing intelligent and thoughtful sequences. It should, above all else, help teachers develop critical thinking skills – just like in any discipline that requires dedication and effort.

Crandell’s advice for newer teachers:

“Stay engaged in your own practice and your own process. Remain a student of life and inspired to learn.”

Janet Stone plays her harmonium. 

Janet Stone

The Journey of Self-Responsibility and Self-Study

Sitting comfortably in her living room with her harmonium by her side, Janet Stone shared that in order to embody yoga, we must begin by taking responsibility for ourselves – our personal well-being and actions. “Whether coming to the practice through asana, meditation or the eight limbs, yoga needs to move off the mat,” she said. She believes that one way to “live” our yoga is through self-study (Svahdyaya), which leads to greater wisdom. As we begin to understand ourselves more, we can and must take responsibility for the ways in which we are engaging with ourselves and the world. “I’m endlessly fascinated at how people can be yoga," said Stone. "And that’s a conversation I want to keep hearing.”

According to Stone, yoga asks us to be in a state of inquiry. But, what are we really inquiring about? Are we inquiring within to really, truly, deeply know ourselves and take responsibility for our actions? How is what we are practicing on the mat going to translate in our day-to-day life? How can we begin to see the impact of our choices? 

See also Janet Stone's Advice for Busy Moms on How to Make Time for Yoga.

Through personal practice, we can find ways to go beyond the “doing” of yoga and begin to embody yoga as a way of life. “The point is to commit to developing a deeper understanding of yourself,” said Stone. “Developing that internal awareness breeds external awareness; cultivating equanimity within helps to cultivate equanimity without.”

Stone’s advice for newer teachers:

“Be a practitioner first. That is the only way you’ll remember you’re not the doer; rather, you allow the teachings to come through you as a result of your own studentship.”