#i need to be better at applying sunblock

[silverstonesainz-archive]

8hrs later… did i tan? yes. did i also probably get skin cancer today? absolutely.

sorry i say a whole lot of nothing when i’m on here 🫶🏼 smooches gonna go attempt to tan

[scientia-rex]

Do you have any moisturization tips? :0

Oh DO I!

Listen, skin has two jobs: keeping you in, and everything else out. Skin has to do a lot of complicated stuff to make that happen. Skin is chock full of glands and pores and whatnot. There's dermis (deeper layer) and epidermis (shallower layer), and 99% of what we're doing from the outside is about the epidermis.

Epidermis grows in as layers--there's a bottom layer that has cells that will just keep dividing forever, and then the cells that divide off that layer will start getting pushed up towards the surface of your skin. As they get pushed up, the cells get flatter and more keratinized and eventually dead.

That "stratum basal" is where you have your forever-dividing cells. So when you start something like Accutane, you can't transform the skin layers above it--you can only start affecting the skin as it marches upward towards its death and flaking off, so you have to give it months to take full effect. And we NEED to have some dead skin. It protects us.

Skin cells have proteins that hold them to each other. The goal is to form a watertight barrier. We need to keep water in because we are basically bags of water. Different protein issues (largely genetic) can cause different skin diseases.

Our skin also has glands that make protective oils (forming a powerful anti-bacterial barrier and trapping moisture inside) and sweat (because we DO want to be able to get rid of water, but only when WE want to).

So here's the thing about commercial moisturizers: none of them can put moisture back in your skin. That's just not a thing. The very best thing they can do is keep further water from leaving your skin. This is especially important if you have eczema, where you stand a good chance (about 50%) of lacking ceramides, which are critical to forming the natural skin barrier. As water evaporates off the skin, it takes more water with it. We don't understand the other half of eczema. Psoriasis involves dysfunction of the keratinization process, which is why those plaques form.

So the best moisturizers are those that create a moisture barrier without evaporating more water off. Any moisturizer where alcohol is a significant ingredient is worthless. Vaseline, or straight white petrolatum, is the best moisturizer. It feels greasy because it is. Its job is to form a watertight barrier, and greasy chemical are a lot better at that than thinner, waterlike chemicals. Moisturizers with silicones, like Aveeno (dimethicone is the active ingredient--I know, the bottle says oatmeal, it's a liar), will provide a fairly robust barrier without as greasy of a feeling. Lanolin, from sheep's wool, is also a great ingredient for forming a barrier, which is why I like Neutrogena Norwegian Formulation. Natural oils like jojoba (the best of the bunch) can be moisturizing, but just FYI, they're a tiny fraction as effective as white petrolatum. Like, less than 10%. I'm too lazy to get up and find my Cosmeceuticals textbook to remind myself exactly how much. So if you want "all natural," resign yourself to worse.

BUT!!!! Your skin is not all the same! You have scalp skin, face skin, neck skin, trunk skin, arm skin, leg skin, skin around your genitals, skin of the palms, and skin of soles of the feet. And all of those can act different. So I can't say "apply Vaseline everywhere" because that might be too much skin barrier for your face--what if your face has oil glands that work perfectly well? What if we need a lighter, less occlusive moisturizer? That's where my personal hell was for the last ten years as I struggled to find a facial moisturizer I like! What if you have oil glands that are overproductive? You may need a totally different moisturizer than I need! No good way to figure it out except trial and error while paying close attention to ingredient lists.

Sunblock is also a good thing to have but as someone who doesn't wear it because a) I don't go outside and b) it always breaks me out, I feel hypocritical talking extensively about it. I wear "dad hats" (at least a 2" brim all the way around) and long sleeves while gardening. You should definitely still wear sunscreen, though. Do as I say, not as I do.

[jjtheresidentbaby]

hi hi <3 hope you're doing okay :) can u do a cg!rafe cameron x little!reader where reader gets minorly wounded, like after falling from their bike or something, and rafe patches them up? thank you <3

˚. ❝₊˚ sunburnt ❞ ˚₊·

» rafe cameron x reader

» a/n: I have an extremely bad sunburn rn so that’s what I went with hope you don’t mind

» warnings: rafe is rubbing product on reader’s back while they’re shirtless but it’s in no way nsfw, talk of the pogues watching over reader, little!sarah mentioned, cg!kie & cg!pope mentioned, cg!barry mentioned, post canon, pet names

You wince as Rafe helps pull your shirt over your head, revealing the worst sunburn Rafe has seen since Sarah got near second degree burns when they were kids, he winces right alongside you. Given for different reasons; you hate the feeling of the material sticking your your skin and causing even more pain to the tight skin, and Rafe because seeing just how bad things have gotten without him around pulls on his heart strings.

It was only a week. One week with the pogues, Sarah acting as your main caregiver but having to have Kie take over when Sarah slipped halfway through the trip you guys took to the mainland. It was- an eventful week, to say the least. Kie and Pope stepped up and were much better at applying sunblock regularly than Sarah in her own regressed state, but the damage was already done and both Kie and Pope looked more than worried when they handed you off to Rafe two days ago. You’re a little surprised he didn’t go off on them then and there.

“Hurts.” You mutter when Rafe runs his hands gently over your back, the way your skin is hot to the touch cause even more worry in Rafe’s mind. He really doesn’t want to have to take you to the hospital.

“I know baby, I’m sorry. I’m gonna apply some coconut oil and then we can go lay back down.” You’ve found the coconut oil works better than the aloe as it leaves your skin moisturized for longer.

“M’kay, can we watch a movie?” That’s all the two of you have been doing for the past two days.

By the time you were driving back to Rafe’s after being away from him for a week you were so homesick Jj had to keep his legs thrown atop yours so you wouldn’t try and climb to the front of the van to get John B to drive faster- it’d be an embarrassing moment to think of if it wasn’t all worth it when Rafe came into view as you rounded the corner to Tannyhill and saw Rafe sitting on the porch waiting for you. The house is technically his and Sarah’s but with Sarah spending almost all her time at the rebuilt chateau, it’s basically just Rafe’s place that acts as storage for some of Sarah’s stuff.

“Course, what do you wanna watch?” Rafe asks and rubs some more oil onto your bare back, making sure that he’s being as careful and soft with his touch as he can be.

“Moana?” A small smile creeps onto Rafe’s lips as he nods along.

“Didn’t we watch that yesterday?” You shrug.

“I like it. Can we ask Barry to come over and watch it with us?” Rafe is obviously your favorite person while you’re regressed but Barry is a close second, and the both of them together is perfect to you. They never fail to make you laugh just by the way they interact with each other and the sidebar jokes Barry shoots your way as Rafe tries to dismiss every word he says.

“Sure, sweet thing. Do you need him to pick up anything before he comes over?” You shake your head and lift your arms when Rafe comes to slip your shirt back on, it’s actually his own but it’s loose and cotton so it’s more comfortable on your skin.

“Not even some fries from The Wreck?” A quirked brow gets sent your way and you quickly scramble to climb into Rafe’s lap before he can pick up the phone to call Barry.

“Wait- wait, yeah fries, get fries.” You plead and Rafe hums along with an arm slipped around your waist to make sure you won’t fall off his lap.

“You sure? You just said you didn’t want anything… Barry will be here quicker if he doesn’t stop-.” You cut Rafe off with a serious look on your face that he finds undeniably cute.

“I lied, I want fries. I don’t care if Barry takes ten hours to get here, I want those fries.” It’ll really only add ten minutes to the route for Barry to go into The Wreck and order some food to-go.

“Okay, okay, I’ll make the call.” He soothes and grabs his phone as you lean back into his chest with a content sigh. Your back doesn’t hurt as bad as it did when you first came home and spending the day with your favorite people will help you forget just how much you missed Rafe in the first place.

[in1-nutshell]

Hi again! If its okay to request TFA, a continuation of Triple changer Buddy? More interactions of Team Prime to Buddy and their personas

Triple changer Buddy has returned!

Since the original post of Triple Changer Buddy did sum up the relations the Bots have with Buddy, I decided to try a different approach with this.

Introducing: Slice of Life

If this isn't what you wanted, please let me know.

Hope you enjoy!

Bot Buddy the Triple Changer and Team Prime: Slice of Life

SFW, Slice of Life, Platonic, Cybertronain reader

TFA

It was a rather hot day.

Even inside an AC filled building, still couldn’t quite refresh everyone at the daycare.

Buddy was having a tough time trying to make sure everyone was hydrating enough and keeping them cool.

“Tommy don’t do that! The crayon is not for—Timmy no you cannot stick the ice cube down Sherry’s shirt!”—Carrier

“Buddy, I’m hot!”—Henry

“I know Henry, but how about we play a little game to pass the time?”--Jester

“No! I’m hot!”--Henry

“I’m sticky!”--Sam

“I’m melting!”--Suzzy

“I’m dying!”--Johnny

Team Prime had stopped by after they got a call from Sari.

Apparently, the faces had been working double time trying to make sure everything was okay that she was worried that they were going to overheat themselves in the process.

Autobots arriving at the daycare.

“What’s the damage kid?”--Ratchet

“That!”--Sari

Buddy flipping through their faces within seconds from each other trying to pass water bottles and soothe the toddlers from the heat.

“Maybe it was a good thing you called.”--Prowl

“How have they not lost their helm yet? Literally, it looks like its going to fly off!”--Bumblebee

“Beats me.”--Sari

“Hi guys!”--Jester

“Hi Buddy, you look like you need some help with the kids today.”—Optimus

“If it doesn’t bother you guys, that would mean a lot. I feel like I’m trying to split in three different places at once!”--Carrier

“We can tell.”--Bulkhead

“Buddy! Where’s the juice boxes?”--Suzzy

“You can’t have too many Suzzy, try some water—”--Carrier

“I want a juice box!”--Suzzy

“Yeah, we’ll help.”--Optimus

“Great! Just stay in the shade for a bit. Don’t want the kids to get burned now don’t we—Junior! Do not touch the railing its burning hot!”--Guardian

The team came over and immediately found shade trying to cool their frames before touching the kids.

They didn’t want to accidentally burn the little ones with their burning frames.

Optimus sprays Bumblebee a bit with his firehose seeing the second smallest member looking a little too hot.

Buddy saw this and had an idea.

They quickly pulled the team in for a huddle session.

“A water park!”--Sari

“Well, a made shift one with sprinklers, and a kiddie pool, and bouncy house with water!”--Jester

“And how are we going to get the supplies for that?”--Ratchet

Buddy walking to the storage room pulling out a bunch of sprinklers, a deflated bounce house, and a deflated kiddie pool.

“Where did you get that?”--Optimus

“I owed a favor for Wreck-Gar. He helped me find this stuff for the kids.”--Carrier

“Umm…”--Prowl

“I made sure it was safe and clean for the kids. I know better.”--Guardian

“Ah, okay then.”--Prowl

“Let’s get this water park thing started!”--Bulkhead

Together, Buddy and the team made a makeshift water park for all the kids to enjoy.

After Guardian, Jester, and Carrier tested it and made sure it was okay for the kids after 10 inspections they released the water and kids.

Optimus was on the water slide duty with his hose spraying the kids that got too dry in the sun.

Ratchet was on sunblock duty with Bulkhead.

Bulkhead made sure to give all the kids the appropriate amount of sunscreen and reminded them to come back to retouch. He did make a little smiley face on the kids before applying it.

Ratchet made sure that the kids that did get sunburnt were treated with Aloe Vera and other remedies Buddy had in the cubbies.

Prowl and Bumblebee were on kid duty with Buddy.

Prowl stayed and watched the kids playing near the kiddie pool. Occasionally joining the water to play with the rubber ducks and little plastic boats.

Bumblebee watched over the kids on the inflatable bounce house.

Did he try to join? Yes, but Guardian came over as soon as they saw this. They promised him that he would have his time when the kids were gone.

Buddy offered shade to the kids how finally got tired and decided to take a quick nap under their shadow.

Sari had joined the fun the entire time.

Soon enough the parents started coming in to pick up their kids.

Buddy made sure every kid went home with a towel all swaddled up whether the kid was asleep or not.

“How was Johnny today, Buddy?”—Ms. Jones

“Well, he was good today. A bit wet from the slide but he had a good day.”--Carrier

Buddy handing a sleepy Johnny to Ms. Jones.

“Thank you, Buddy! Stay cool!”—Ms. Jones

“You too Ms. Jones! And don’t forget to hydrate!”—Carrier

The sun had already started setting when the last of the kids had left.

Bumblebee did a couple jumps on the bounce house before realizing how tired he was and sat down next to Bulkhead who was looking at the sunset with Prowl.

Optimus was slowly blinking his optics while Ratchet washed the rest of the Aloe vera from his servos.

Sari had fallen asleep on Buddy servo.

Buddy gave Sari to Ratchet.

Ratchet gave them a look as Buddy went over to Prime and lifted him onto their shoulder.

Prime did try to move but he was tired.

“You can put me down.”--Optimus

“I’m taking you back to the Plant.”--Guardian

“I can walk.”--Optimus

“I know, but you deserve a break.”--Guardian

“But—”--Optimus

“Shh!”--Guardian

Buddy insisted they get everyone home safely as a thank you for helping with today.

Bulkhead luckily was awake enough to walk home with a semi sleepy Prowl perched on his shoulder.

Normally he would rather walk home, but Bulkhead had offered. And he was very tired, so this one time wouldn’t hurt.

Buddy grabbed the sleeping Bumblebee with their other servo throwing him over their shoulder like Prime.

“Hey!”--Bumblebee

“Shh. Take a nap Bee, you earned it.”--Guardian

“No, I can walk!”--Bumblebee

“Sleep.”--Guardian

“But—”--Bumblebee

“Let it go, Bumblebee, just let it go.”--Optimus

“…Fine…”—Bumblebee

Buddy turning to Ratchet.

“No carrying for me kid. Someone has to make sure Sari doesn’t get squished when we get back.”--Ratchet

“Okay Ratchet. Let go.”--Buddy

They all began their walk back to the plant as a cool breeze set in. A blessing from the hot weather from the daytime.

[howtobecomeadragon]

mike gets sunburnt every summer. he tries to remember his sunblock, he really does, but sometimes it slips his mind. sometimes he does put it on but he then forgot to re-apply the sunblock after his first application washed off when he swam or when he was outside all afternoon.

either way, he inevitably always burns. he withstands the teasing from the others for a week, puts aloe vera on his burns with annoyance every day at his mom's insistence. and then his skin starts to get a little bit itchy and then suddenly, his sunburn is peeling.

will is his designated sunburn skin peeler. when lucas did it, he wasn't delicate enough and ended up peeling it to the unsunburnt edges of his skin, causing it to sting and pull. mike always ended up smacking lucas's hands away with a loud "ow, shit, stop!" lucas rolled his eyes at him and told him, "fine, you can keep looking nasty with all your peeling skin." when dustin peeled the sunburnt skin, he always got grossed out, making fake retching noises to make will and lucas laugh, and made distressed groans when faced with a back full of mike's peeling sunburnt skin. mike would call out "this means it's healing, okay! the skin underneath is healthy and not burnt. just do it!"

that left will. he was patient and gentle with his artist's fingers. when he peeled some sunburnt skin that stung, mike hissed in pain and will immediately stopped, whispering, "sorry, sorry. maybe i'll get that one in a few days." when will got a big peel, he showed it to mike with his nose scrunched up, looking a little grossed out but also delighted with sick fascination.

what his peeling sunburnt skin really was was a good exercise in trust. mike didn't love his body all the time. he took his shirt off to swim, got sunburnt on his back and shoulders, and then he couldn't reach the peeling skin as the sunburn faded. the peeling skin made him feel gross, entirely and overwhelmingly self-conscious by how disgusting it looked. and to get it off, he had to take his shirt off again to show it to someone and ask them to help.

will's fingers on his back always made him shiver a little bit. cooler fingers on burnt skin, perhaps. but he was often just red and flushed with the exposure of it all, and maybe that's why he shivered. his bare back being face up surrounded by his fully clothed friends, dustin making jokes about it all, lucas itching to meticulously get rid of all peeling skin with ruthless efficiency.

will helped. he made mike shiver but he helped. he was quiet in a way that mike knew probably just reflected his focus, similar to his focus while painting, but it also allowed time for mike to breathe through his anxiety and his discomfort at being shirtless like this. he wondered what will thought about his back, if his shoulders seemed broad enough, if he had too many moles, if he seemed too skinny or not skinny enough. maybe not muscular enough.

he always managed to breathe through it though, and on the other side, will would quietly say something funny or sweet or distracting, and mike could stop thinking for a moment about will seeing him half naked with gross, peeling skin.

when will was done, he laid a warm hand on mike's back, up between his shoulder blades. it was soft and fleeting but reassuring, and will announced, "all done! it looks a lot better." and he took his hand away.

mike sat up, reached around to feel his back feeling much smoother, and grinned gratefully at will. he shrugged his shirt back on and said, "oh my god, thank you so much. last sunburn of the summer, i promise."

will snorted and said, "sure."

but next time they went to the pool, once they all got out of the pool, will tossed him some sunblock and said, with a twinkle in his eyes, "put some on, okay? i can help if you can't reach your back." but then he averted his eyes quickly as mike flipped open the cap on the sunblock.

mike didn't need help applying it. but he thought about will's offer. he thought about it all afternoon and it hung in his mind for hours after he got home. he thankfully didn't get sunburnt after he put on a second application of sunblock.

he thought some more about will's offer and the way his eyes turned away as mike awkwardly put the sunblock on in front of all the people at the pool. maybe will knew he felt a little uncomfortable shirtless and being looked at too much. maybe mike wouldn't have minded if will had looked, though. will's eyes were always soft and gentle and held a feeling in them that helped mike relax in his skin.

he called will that night. mike thanked him for the extra sunblock and the reminder to put on a second coat, and reported that he was currently sunburn-free. will laughed and brushed off the gratitude like it was nothing. it was late so they both spoke quietly into their phones, mike cradling the handset close to his mouth.

"so maybe you can make it through the summer with no more sunburns, huh?" will asked. he laughed and added, "no more peeling skin to deal with."

mike's head was fuzzy because it had been a long, sun soaked day, and they were already well into the night. he thought of will offering to apply the sunblock again, and of the shiver mike felt at will looking at his back. it was anxiety of being looked at mixed with... something. something that felt like butterflies or the shiver you get from a fever, the flush of a sun kissed cheeks, the comfort of wanting to be soft and quiet on the phone with his best friend late into the night. it reminded him of how he felt watching will get tanner and tanner all summer long, while mike just got pink over and over again. it was how he felt when will took off his shirt to swim, when mike saw the tan line on his arm from wearing t-shirts in the sun all summer. it was the flutter he got from will's scrunched up nose, his big smile, his laugh.

mike's head was buzzing and his heart was pounding out of his chest. the words tumbled out of him, not responding to what will had said at all. "do you want to go to a movie with me tomorrow night?"

there was quiet on the other end of the phone, mike could just hear will's breathing for a few moments.

"like with lucas and dustin?"

mike rushed to answer, "no. no. just you and me. i want to take you to the movies."

quiet again, before will said, speaking quickly and fumbling a little, "yeah, that sounds really fun. let's do that."

mike held the phone handset even closer to his face, as if that would help him see will from across town and know exactly what he was feeling. "no risk of a sunburn at the movies," mike joked.

will laughed quietly and said, "no, it should be a safe place for you."

mike thought to himself, absently, as if floating, that right next to will was always a safe place for him. once he grabbed onto the thought, it hit him hard.

he whispered quietly into the dark, "i'll get us icee's and some candy tomorrow night. whatever you want"

will's voice floated back to him, a little breathless with a small laugh. "i don't need much, mike. i'll just be happy with some reece's pieces. it'll be fun even... even without any candy. it's always fun going to the movies with you."

mike grinned and resisted the urge to bury his face in his pillow. "yeah. yeah, it is. i'll get you some candy anyway though."

mike hoped, as they said goodnight and hung up their phones, that will knew. he hoped that will could tell what mike meant, what was just beneath his words. will always seemed to get him, so he probably did. if not, mike was going to hold his hand at the movies the next night anyway, and will would definitely figure it out then. will's hand in his would probably be just as soft and reassuring as it was when it rested on mike's shirtless back.

mike had a little shiver at the thought before falling asleep.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Topsy Turvy Days in Savanaclaw

Father and son, in the same dorm once again… Oh yeah, and Floyd’s also there 😂

The King of Beasts, and his Spirit of Persistence.

Lilia Vanrouge...

... looks so out of place within a group of muscular Savanaclaw students, both in stature and in bulk. He relishes in the almost comedic difference in the proportions between himself and his dorm mates, thinking it greatly amusing to be surrounded by intimidating looking men. "It was the very same back in my days in the military or in Diasomnia," he chuckles. "I provide all the charm that is necessary, no matter the group I am in." Lilia gets a real kick out of acting overly cutesy while he’s surrounded by big, buff guys—it always catches passerbys off guard (“Tee hee! You’d better watch out, or we’ll punish you ⭐️”)

No one took Lilia all that seriously to begin with. The Savanaclaw kids constantly jeered at him, unaware that they were actually provoking a great fairy general! Lilia isn’t really bothered by it, but he had to teach them to properly respect their elders—and before long, he’s become one of the most popular people in the dorm?! The students he beat up especially gain a sense of admiration for him. (“You’re so cool, aniki!! You’re small, but you pack a punch!!”)

Oddly enough, the Savanaclaw students also come to respect the knowledge Lilia has to impart. Some of the boys come off as perhaps too gruff or quick to anger, but you can always count on Lilia-chan to be there with some good advice or his own experiences to relate to them. He doesn’t see them as violent or troubled kids; he wants to hear them out and see where they’re coming from. Not only does he give tips on how to be better fighters, but he also dishes out the wisdom they need for the most existential of crises—who are they, and what is their purpose in this world? How can someone seemingly so young possess wisdom that rivals that of the great kings of the past? It’s a mystery to the entire dorm.

In spite of all that he knows, Lilia wants to learn even more!! He asks the various beastmen that inhabit Savanaclaw about their own cultures and customs, as they vary from subspecies to subspecies. They’ll pal around and get rowdy as they tell their tales and spin their histories for him, and the more that Lilia hears, the more he appreciates that he is able to peacefully coexist with such interesting people.

Lilia rises bright and early with a spring in his step! He has lots of things to do before the school day even starts, and that includes liberally applying sunscreen and sneaking over to Silver’s room and dragging his son up for rigorous morning training!! They exercise and stretch together just like old times. Due to Lilia’s sun sensitivity, he has to cover up a lot of his skin (meaning he sweats more easily) and they have to take frequent water breaks.

Lilia’s sun protection game in the savanna is on point!! He’s packed his extra strength sunblock, his parasol, a sun visor, gloves, long sleeve clothes and pants, and an assortment of silly sunglasses. He has glittery heart-shaped frames, one that comes with a honking clown nose, and even a pair that has a twirly little mustache—all souvenirs he’s collected over the years.

The beastmen are particularly sensitive to the racket (practicing his music/singing for Pop Music Club) coming from Lilia’s room, as well as the smells/tastes of whatever weird UFOs (unidentified food objects) he has whipped up. Heightened senses are a detriment when the hazard known as Lilia is in the immediate vicinity!! Most recently, Lilia found a fascinatingly rotund grub which he tossed into a pasta dish that gave off an already ominous aura. (He claims it “tastes like chicken, slimy yet satisfying!”, but no one touched it… except Floyd, who ate it on a dare and laid in bed for the next two days with terrible cramps.)

Lilia casually hangs out upside down on the rope bridge runways. Since they’re located so close to the dorm rooms, sometimes the students get spooked finding Lilia staring at them dead in the face when they exit. He’ll just laugh and swing down, wishing them a good morning or sweet dreams—when, surely, he knows that his sudden appearance is sure to give some of them startles and mild nightmares.

“Kufufu, I’m quite enjoying my time here in Savanaclaw. Certainly, its fledgling prince and I may not see eye-to-eye on leadership matters, but that has no bearing on the strength of those he serves. This dormitory is strong not only in terms of physical attributes, but in character and heart. And truly, that is the strongest muscle there is. Without these welcoming lads, I wouldn’t have had nearly half as much fun as I did~

Floyd Leech...

… doesn’t really feel one way or another about the matter. He thought it would be cool to be a part of Savanaclaw when he was asked about it, but that was then, and this is now! He doesn’t linger on any one opinion for all too long. The thing he’s most excited for is just to be away from work for a bit, a trip where he can go and squeeze the daylights out of new targets sounds good in his book!

… Well, Floyd intended on treating this dorm swap thing like a vacation getaway but Azul and Jade still contact him about “business”. Azul thinks of this as a golden opportunity to sneak around for clues of Leona’s weaknesses. Meanwhile, Jade just wants his brother to collect samples of various savanna-exclusive fungi for his personal research. Floyd leaves them both on read because he can’t be bothered with them right now.

Floyd immediately hits everyone up to brawl. No reason for it is really needed, he just wants to fight strong opponents and to face real challenges to come out on top! … Anyway, Floyd decimates each and every challenger with ease (and, in venting some of his frustration over Leona refusing to entertain him in combat, sent some students to the nurse’s office). He’s bored out of his miiind!!

Of course, the dry savanna biome will wreak havoc on a merperson’s natural need to remain moisture sooo… Say good-bye to the waterfall and pool area in the Savanaclaw lounge. Floyd has monopolized it for himself, and he doesn’t need to pitch up a “Beware of Sharks” sign for everyone and their dads to know it. The instant you see his tail or head slowly rising up from the water, that’s when you start running.

Floyd picks up a pretty useful saying he hears a lot around the dorm (originating in the Afterglow Savanna). “Hakuna matata”, which means no worries for the rest of your days. It’s meant to be a saying that reassures others, but Floyd uses it to justify acting on his own whims. For example, he’ll punch someone in the arm a little too forcefully (to the point where it seems like a provocation rather than being playful), then follow it up with “hakuna matata” (it’s his ironic equivalent of, “don’t worry about it, bro”).

Floyd adapts extremely well to the more “wild” ways of Savanaclaw, letting more of his own animalistic nature come out. His sharp teeth sink in a little too easily into that leg of… zebra meat. He gets a little too rough when he wants to show affection or just hang out. Whatever Floyd does, it’s somehow magnified by a factor of ten—it must be the environment that’s bringing out the most of his inner wild child. (“Goodness, he’s really cutting loose,” Lilia observes. “It’s nice to see the youth so full of energy.”)

The wide open spaces of Savanaclaw’s lounge means there’s plenty of room for Floyd to monkey around without worrying about breaking expensive furniture. He launches himself all over the place in complex and increasingly dangerous parkour moves, his raspy, hyena-like cackling ringing out in the lounge and rippling across the waters. It’s a wonder how he comes out of those intense sessions totally unscathed, yet still manages to somehow tear up his surroundings.

No one knows where the heck Floyd found them, but he rummaged around and collected enough bones to make a working drum set??? He has a grand old time banging on it using two long arm bones as drumsticks. It’s a little eerie and odd to watch and to listen to, but it’s very “Floyd��� of him to march to the beat of his own drum. Before long, he attracts a bit of an audience, participate with their own percussion or offer up lyrics. Even Lilia and Silver join in the impromptu song number (although Silver’s animal friends need some soothing to be comfortable around the bony instruments).

“Eeeh, I thought this place would have more interesting things. There’s no one here as strong as me, so there’s not a real challenge. Azul and Jade have been blowing up my phone for favors too… Maaan, they’re really tickin’ me off today. At least Savanclaw’s got alllll this space and no one can tell me what to do. Losers don’t get the right to boss me around. Ehehehe~ Survival of the fittest’s the name of the game, and I’m killin’ it!!”

Silver...

… is relieved that he can be by his father’s side in this unfamiliar new environment. He doesn’t doubt that Lilia can look after himself just fine, but his tendency to fret for Lilia’s wellbeing never totally goes away. It’s been a while since they’ve had some quality father-son time, just the two of them—and now is as good of as time as any to catch up.

Sebek bombards Silver’s phone with a wall of texts, each loudly (all caps) expressing his jealousy that Silver gets to spend one-on-one time with their mentor (while weeping about how he and Malleus aren’t in the same dorm, OH WOE IS HE). Silver’s able to calm his junior down by sharing nice little anecdotes and pictures of his surroundings—shards of sunlight piercing the sky, the distant call of unique birds. They’re memories he will treasure forever, and precious moments he wants to share with the others in Diasomnia when he returns.

Knowing that his father is not good with sunlight, Silver becomes Lilia’s personal shield whenever possible. He’ll literally walk in front of Lilia or contort himself into weird shapes just to let his father be a little cooler in his shadow (even though Lilia will tug on his arm and insist that they’re equals, so they should walk side-by-side instead)! “… What if I just held your parasol for you, father? Would that be acceptable? Please, let me assist you.”

The warm weather of the savanna is dangerous for Silver. He’s usually sleepy, but it’s sooo much easier for him to faceplant into the dirt in such cozy conditions! Luckily for him, Lilia’s nearby to swoop in and haul Silver off to bed, be it at the base of a tree or in a hammock. Lilia stays by his side all the while, sometimes humming a soft, vaguely familiar lullaby as he strokes his son’s hair, sending him off safely into the world of dreams.

He’s… kind of dense sometimes. Silver likes to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and think the best of them, even when the other party is clearly being an aggressor. Whenever he so much as accidentally brushes shoulders with a Savannaclaw student in the halls, they get all up in his face and Silver just stares back, bows, and offers an apology. Somehow he interprets every fight or provocation as a genuine mistake or an attempt to make friends. Just how much of a space cadet is he?! the Savanaclaw kids wonder.

Like with Lilia, fhe Savanaclaw students aren’t initially very friendly to Silver. Something about his aura just pisses them off (maybe because he reminds them of “those goody two shoes RSA chumps”, especially with that parade of cute woodland creatures following him wherever he goes). They do whatever they can to intimidate and pick on him, but it never seems to faze Silver. Their fruitless efforts eventually wear down over time. In the aftermath, it’s as though Silver’s “zen” attitude has somehow rubbed off on them… or, rather, they’ve gotten so fed up with him that they just turn the other way and tell themselves he’s not worth the effort. All’s well that ends well…?

Silver is the only soul willing to approach Floyd and attempt to negotiate terms with him to open up the waterfall and pool area to all again. (After all, he was taught that peace and understanding between the races is entirely possible!) He reasons that it’s not fair to their dorm mates snd surely doesn’t Floyd realize they would all be happier holding hands and basking under the waterfall together? Floyd only listens for a few minutes before groaning and diving below the water, drenching Silver in the process. “Do whatever, Jellyfish!! Just shut your trap, will ya? I’m about to fall asleep listening to you myself.”

He volunteers as tribute! In place of his dad, Silver will fight Floyd to keep him amused. It somehow blows up to a spectacle, hoards of Savanaclaw students cheering and taking bets for who will come out on top (Lilia is in the front row, all decked out in Silver merch). As soon as the battle starts, Floyd charges in full force… and Silver flings his arms out to receive him with an aggressive hug?! “I understand, Floyd!” Silver declares, his eyes burning with seriousness. “You were just lonely and wanted a friend, so you sought out attention. Don’t worry, I’ll happily be your friend.” (“HAAAH?! Are you CRAZY, Jellyfish?!” It kills Floyd’s combative mood, and ends in a draw.)

“I think this experience has been very valuable. I was able to spend time with not only my father, but with people of many different races. Humans, fairies, merpeople, beastmen… It gives me hope that, someday, we can create a society in which all of us can live together in harmony. A world where everyone understands the balance and respects all creatures… That is the kind of future that I dream of, and I will do everything in my power to make it a reality.”

[fatuismooches]

ok im going to talk about dottore with a lover who hates wearing sunblock but is also pale because guess what (poses) also brought to you by the tiny sunburn on my shoulder (im korean so it's not as bad and i just tan but i also got the vampire genes) (aka: pale and looks young forever)

Dottore who has to sneak aloe or sunblock into lotion for his lover because they will just Not Wear Sunblock

In the deserts of sumeru and they're wearing clothes that show skin because its Fucking Hot? Refuse, absolutely not

"You're going to get burnt."

"If the sun decides it is my time it is my time"

"Absolutely not."

Dottore's lover who will whine and complain about having to wear sunblock because "it feels weird" as if getting sunburnt is any better

Dottore who KNOWS his lover knows why they should wear sunscreen but it's always a boss battle when he tries to get them to wear it.

One day, Dottore doesn't make them, figuring they'll learn their lesson, cue his lover covered in sunburns.. do they complain? no. do they learn from their mistakes? ALSO NO?? he's so confused and i think that's funny

It gets to the point where Dottore just makes his lover carry an umbrella because, then at least they're both somewhat happy

- 🎈 who spent too long at a water park, slipped and hurt their ankle, then caught air when on a water slide

🎈 ANON?? ARE YOU OKAY ??? I hope your ankle is okay!! 😭 Though i hope you had fun at the water park, that sounds fun ❤️

Anyway... 🎈 anon would you be alarmed if i said i like. never wear sunscreen... 💀 I don't think I've ever gotten really sunburnt though? Dottore will probably have to introduce me to sunscreen because I honestly forget it exists sometimes 😅

Regardless, this idea is so funny to me because he's going out of his way to care for you and you're just going to... deny his kind act? Who do you think you are? You're wearing this sunscreen, whether you like it or not. He will not hear of it when you start complaining of your skin hurting and cracking and will leave you to fend for yourself! (You never ended up complaining for some odd reason, but anyway, he begrudgingly applied some soothing cream on you while he just went on about how you need to listen to him otherwise this wouldn't have happened!! + insult insult insult) (he is still worried for you) (this has happened more than once) (for once he is unsure what to do and thinks you're a weirdo, affectionately though)

Reader is the kind of person to use the guise of the heat to pull Zandik under the umbrella with them, so they have an excuse to be close to him (too bad this isn't a perfect romantic novel rainy-day situation, Zandik doesn't fall for it because he wears sunscreen unlike someone else, he scowls)

Good thing in Snezhnaya sunscreen isn't needed anymore! You still keep the umbrella for memories though, it has probably gone through many trials but you love it anyway <3

[vodika-vibes]

“You make me want to be soft.”

They’re all so soft for each other I love them sm 😭

They are~

They're great. I love them so much.

@moonwrecked

"Do you need more sun block, cyare?" Fixer asks as he settles on the blanket next to Rynn. "I think I'm okay." She replies, and then she cracks open an eye, "Unless you just want to apply more sunblock as an excuse to touch me." Fixer flashes an amused grin, "Guilty. You're very tempting, laying there." She laughs, "So sorry." "Don't be. I love it." He slowly slides his hands up her back and she practically melts into the blanket, "Or I could just give you a massage, I suppose." Fixer jokes. "That sounds lovely." He rearranges himself slightly, and proceeds to start a slow, but deep, massage. "So, how long do you think we have until the Council starts searching for you." She hums, "Not my problem. Boss can handle anyone who shows up uninvited." Fixer laughs and sweeps her hair off of her neck, leaning in to press a kiss against the back of her neck, "So glad that you have a plan." He teases. "Mm, my plan is let the scary people handle it." She jokes, shifting so that she's laying on her back and then pulling Fixer down so she can kiss him properly. "This is not a massage," Fixer mumbles against her lips. "Mm, this is better."

[albatmobile]

The Art of Rehabilitating Snowbirds Chapter 5

𓅪 After not hearing from Roy or Jason for five years, you suddenly find yourself taking in extra income as a babysitter for Roy and Jason's child.

𓅪 Rated: M | TW: attempted assault  | 9k  includes: Damian helping u apply sunscreen before the angst, dinner w babs and Steph where they give u the inside info on past batboy feelings for u, Red Hood saves u from thugs, u wear Roy’s clothes

fem!Reader x Jason Todd x Roy Harper [masterlist]

Chapter Five: Lost in Translation | ao3 - wattpad

Damian ends up whisking you and Jon away on a yachting adventure, insisting you need to get out more. At first, you're offended, that is until you realize holding your tongue means going out of state on a yacht. Suddenly all previous offense dissipates.

Damian reminds you for the second time that, even though it's out of state, it's only a fifteen-minute drive. Whatever. It just sounds fancier. 

You’re only holding your tongue just this one time though, so Damian better not get used to it.

This is how you end up in Happy Harbor in the middle of the week, lounging on the top deck in the hot tub with Damian. Jon disappeared somewhere inside to get you guys drinks and check out the food, but he comes back soon after.

“Do you need sunblock?” you ask Damian, noticing his shoulders turning pink under the direct glare of the sun's 80-degree rays. He's about to open his mouth, probably to tell you to fuck off, but you know he'll thank you later. “You need sunblock. Come here.”

“No,” he spits out your name, dodging whichever way you move in the water all while avoiding your sunscreen-covered palms. “I don’t even burn,” he insists quickly when you get particularly close.

“Everyone burns, dumbass,” you say as you leap forward to tackle him into submission, though you know he’s partially let you. With Damian subdued, you waste no time in spreading the cream across his burning, tanned shoulders. 

He eventually relaxes into your touch, even going as far as hopping up onto the ledge to give you better access to the rest of his upper body. Though, this new position now means you're eye level with his crotch. He doesn’t bother with fussing; he just stays still enough for you to rub it along the ripples of his muscular chest and back, making you wish you’d never offered. 

This ended up being a lot more than you bargained for.

It’s only as you reach the waistband of his trunks that he places a dark hand over yours. “This is where I draw the line.” He smirks and swiftly hops out of the hot tub to avoid you trying, keyword trying, to put sunscreen on his face. “I think you’ll need it more than I do.” 

You look down to see that you do indeed appear rosier than usual, though you’re not entirely sure it’s just from the sun. 

“Okay, so put some on me then.” You shrug nonchalantly. At least, you hope it looked nonchalant… You aren’t trying to let him know just how riled up you were after, essentially, feeling him up.

“Ew, gross,” Damian says, wrinkling his nose in disgust. “I don’t want to catch anything you’ve got.”

Your jaw drops. “But I just did it for you!”

“That’s because you wanted to,” he looks way too proud of himself. Way too proud. 

From where you stand, you can tell he’s definitely flexing his abs right now on purpose.

You roll your eyes at his arrogant display and push the bottle of sunscreen into his hands. You hop out of the tub and make your way over to the lounge chairs together, but he just pushes it right back at you.

“Just put this shit on my back, dude,” you huff in annoyance. “You may not care about burning out here, but I do.”

Instead of helping (because when has Damian ever been considered helpful?), he mocks you in a high-pitched voice, "Dude.”

Seriously?

Okay, well, two can play this game, Wayne.

“Aw, cute! That’s exactly how you sounded when I first met you,” you imitate freshman Damian saying your name but highly exaggerate the pitch just to piss him off.

“Did not.”

It worked.

“Did, too.” 

He aggressively snatches the bottle from your hand. “You know, for someone who doesn’t want to burn, it sure sounds like you want to burn.” He dangles the sunscreen like he’s going to drop it on top of your head, but you don’t give him the reaction he wants, so he eventually huffs and pops open the cap. 

You grin, dangling your victory obnoxiously in his face as you roll over onto your stomach to give him better access to your back. There's really no reason to, considering the string bikini you're wearing grants him any access he'll need, seeing as it doesn’t cover a whole lot of you in the first place.

“Damn, you’re so aggressive with it,” you whine as he digs in. Yes, digs into your skin to apply the cream. He seems to think that the sunscreen needs to be applied with a certain psi to be effective with the way his hands continue to push into your skin. “Please never become a masseuse,” you joke, but he significantly lightens his touch as he makes his way down to your lower back. You quietly exhale in relief. 

“I hire masseuses. Why would I become one?” His voice sounds slightly restrained.

“To give me free massages?” you state the obvious with a smirk thrown over your shoulder at him, not that he's looking at your face, though you note a twinge of amusement. 

“Seems like that's already a benefit of yours.” His fingertips lightly trail down to where your back meets the top string of your bottoms and stops abruptly. “I’m not touching your ass. Nice try, though.”

You laugh, grabbing the bottle from his hands to lather it on your backside while he watches. “Still looking at it, though,” you jest with a wink thrown his way, reveling in how he bristles as he walks over to claim the lounge chair across from your own. 

“Hard not to when it’s that fat.” He curls his face into disgust as he puts on his sunglasses. “Might even be bigger than Nightwing’s.” 

“Enough with the compliments, Damian. You’re making me blush,” you tease him, kicking your legs up behind you like a girl writing in her diary. “Makin’ a girl feel all special ’n shit.” You flip over with a whine, “Also, you've never talked comics with me before. What’s up with that?”

“They’re for lame losers like you. Besides, I’ve never picked one up, but I do watch the news.” He reaches over and clicks a button on the side table. Almost immediately, two stewardesses bring out towels along with some sort of infused water for Damian and quickly leave without a word. You make a weird face. “What?” 

“You didn’t tell me it was chartered.”

“What do I look like? Someone with an unchartered yacht. Please.” He rolls his eyes from the lounge chair across from yours and tilts his Bottega Veneta sunglasses further up on his face. “Why do you keep looking constipated like that?”

“Nothing. Sometimes I forget you’re super fucking rich.” 

Not even in your wildest imagination could you have pictured yourself on a yacht with people to cater to your every frivolous whim. If anything, the most you’d hoped for was a full fridge and a normal family, but Damian’s wild experiences will suffice for now.

It just seems too unrealistic for someone like you to be able to enjoy crazy indulgences like this, especially when these same experiences don’t seem to affect Damian in the slightest.

“I don’t think I ever ended up hearing about how your meeting with Roy and Jason went,” Jon says, walking towards you and Damian with a tray of fresh drinks from the inside bar. Jon and you both felt very weird about the whole service thing, so you understand why he’d just want to serve himself. “Damian mentioned that you seemed a bit nervous.” 

You laugh. That's a complete understatement. 

“It went alright. Kid’s cute.” Damian tch’s at that. “What? She is! And Roy, well, he’s missing a hand since the last time I saw him, so there’s that.” 

You wonder if Damian will correct you- wonder if he'll tell you that the prosthetic was also further up his arm, but he doesn’t. Instead, you're left to wonder just how much of his arm is actually gone.

“I told you he’s changed,” Damian says. With or without his verbal boasting, his face reads: ‘I told you so' clear as day. 

“Yeah, no fucking kidding. I still don’t understand why you couldn’t’ve given me a heads up buuut,” you sit up straighter to visually demonstrate to them how his prosthetic hand looked, “it was all black and like, had this like shooty-thing right here.” You point to the top of your hand. “Or, well, it kinda looked like it, but I doubt that. Right?” Jon nods as if he has any idea what you're talking about. You appreciate his enthusiasm, nonetheless. “But he seemed pretty much the same other than that. Still hot as ever, though, obviously.” You waggle your eyebrows at Jon, mainly because Damian seems content ignoring the two of you ever since the topic had been broached. 

“Whatever,” Damian gripes as he petulantly sips his drink. It isn’t until Jon asks to see a picture that Damian sighs in annoyance. “Don’t let her pull into her smut, Jon. I’m more attractive than both of them combined, easily. Right?” he imitates your tone from earlier. 

You and Jon giggle at the jealousy in his tone as you show him pictures of Jason, Roy and you from high school. 

“You’ve always been really pretty.” He points at you in a picture taken while the three of you had been arguing at in the manor library. “But, yeah, I’d be hot and bothered too,” he says, pretending to fan himself at the sight of Roy and Jason. “Jeesh!”

“Shut up!” Damian slams his drink down on the side table next to him, removing his sunglasses with sharp malice. “Enough about those two dimwits already.” 

It’s silent after that. 

The waves lapping up the sides of the ship and the seagull's chatter serve as reminders of the resulting awkwardness now in place of the lively conversations that had previously masked them.

“It’s not that serious-” You attempt to give him an out and get the jovial atmosphere back, but it seems he doesn’t care. “Damian, are you being for real?” His face leaves no room for debate. “Okay, fine. We’ll stop,” you say to calm him down before he can really go off, but it seems it’s already too late. 

From the slight twitch of his eye and the telltale sign of his neck vein popping out, you have a very upset Damian Wayne on your hands. Well, you turn to Jon in alarm, the two of you have a very upset Damian Wayne on your hands.

You think he’ll remain quiet, content to glare at you for the rest of however long his hissy-fit lasts, but no. The combination of the hot sun coupled with too many drinks leaves Damian’s usual short temper even shorter.

“We get it,” Damian sits up, menacingly facing you from across the short distance of the deck as if you hadn’t even spoken, “you’re a desperate wannabe who clings to unavailable people. Truly pathetic and completely high school, if you ask me.”

You don’t even know what to say.

Where was all of this coming from?

Jon seems to, for lack of better words, be in the same boat.

“Woah, Damian,” Jon searches Damian’s purposefully blank face as defends you from the uncalled-for outburst, “she’s your friend. Why are you acting like this?”

You’re still stupefied by his abrupt hostility. You try to retrace your steps, seeing where the conversation had gone awry, but you come up blank. All you’d talked about was Roy and Jason for not even a second… Wait. 

Was he really telling you to shut up over talking about them?

You think back to high school when he never seemed too upset when you talked about them, aside from a few eye-rolls and such. Now, though? Now, it’s like a completely taboo topic for Damian.

“She used to be my best friend.” His words come out cold and uninterested, as if he’s completely over the conversation and you.

“Used to?” you finally ask in a soft voice barely audible above the overlapping waves against the boat. 

You’d done nothing but be at his side endlessly. You thought you understood him when no one else had, just as he’d done for you. So, why was he saying this?

Ever since Jason and Roy came back into the picture, it was like you could see flashes of the old Damian. The one who was always fighting for your attention over his brothers. It had always been comical to you, considering Damian had always had your undivided attention whether he realized it or not. 

“Like you haven’t noticed.” Damian motions to Jon, who doesn’t seem to know what to do with himself, but, then again, neither do you. You’ve never been on the wrong side of Damian’s ire like you are right now. 

“Damian, what did I do?” You can’t help the genuine hurt and confusion that drips from your every word, pleading with him to stop. “I’ve only been talking to them for a few days, so how could you already be replacing me?”

“Maybe I knew they’d be coming back and prepared myself,” he responds cryptically. If you weren’t already so upset, you'd probably roll your eyes at the blatant lie. 

You look at Jon, but he still seems just as baffled. “He’s been like this ever since the day after we painted.” 

It doesn’t take long to connect that what you thought was going on, was going on. 

The day after the penthouse party is when you’d gone over to dump about your Jason and Roy problems. Now, today he’s blowing up after you showed Jon an old picture. 

It's clear as day to everyone but Damian, it seems.

Why he's jealous of your complicated relationship with them, you have no idea.

“You’re so jealous, Damian. It’s really cute.” You attempt to cover up your hurt with nonchalance, giving him another chance to calm down.

He doesn’t take it. 

“Jealous? Me? Please,” Damian scoffs and tilts his head in just a way that causes his sunglasses to reflect a ray of the sun directly into your eye. This leaves you to dodge out of its way by lying back down. “Let’s not forget that you’re on my yacht,” he curses your last name. “Would you like a one-way ticket off of it?” 

“Would I be able to stay dry?” you ask tonelessly as you adjust your navy bikini top. You really hope whatever steam Damian’s letting off is almost out because you're running out of patience. 

It doesn’t help you're all quite literally trapped in the middle of the ocean on a boat together, either.

“What do you think?” he snarls.

“Whatever, man,” you snort. If he gets a free pass at being a dick, so do you. “Jon,” he looks like he’d rather not be dragged back into one of your tiffs, “how do you put up with him?” You place a delicate hand over your bikini-clad chest. “How did I ever put up with him?”

He glares at you as if daring you to make him explain exactly why he even confronted you in the first place: you were a loser. Though you remind yourself, to be fair, Damian was somewhat of a social outcast himself, so he's one to talk. 

“Maybe those rumors they used to spread about you were true,” he falsely muses to get a rise out of you. 

It works. 

It’s simple but effective. 

No one knows how to push your buttons quite like Damian does and today is a prime example of this. You shoot up from your seat with fury burning in your eyes, coming to an abrupt halt at the end of his chair, wrought with rage. 

“You know they weren’t."  

How dare he insinuate he wasn’t your first, well… everything. 

You continue to stand over him, waiting for him to say anything, but he sits in silence with a small smile you so badly want to knock off his face. 

Finally, he yawns and you anxiously await whatever dumb shit he’s about to spew. “Who really knows?” 

"I've never even so much as had a boyfriend, Dami,” you respond through gritted teeth, reveling in how his face finally falls.

You definitely caught him off guard, but you’re not entirely sure.

He covers it up as soon as you take notice, stirring the pot to cover up the brief break in his rock-solid façade. "Then you really are a whore."

It’s as if you blackout because the next thing you know, you’re holding an empty glass. 

You come to just in time to see Damian, in a now soaked swimsuit, lunging at you with a devilish glint in his dark eyes. Meanwhile, Jon desperately smooshes himself in between the two of you as best he can in an attempt to separate you both, but to no avail. 

“DAMIAN, GET OFF OF HER!” he shouts, drawing the attention of the deck crew, who move in to help Jon intervene. 

You don’t bother touching him; it’d be too dumb of a move. He’d obviously know any moves you’d use, seeing as he was the one who’d taught you the self-defense moves you know, albeit foggily. Supposedly, he taught you everything he knows, but with his ever-present ninja-like reflexes, you’re pretty sure he’s held some moves back from you.

You don’t want to give him a reason to hurt you any further in a way he can’t come back from, so you turn your head to the side, exposing your neck to signal to him you're done dealing with his shit. Well, your shit because you’d technically started it.

Ugh. 

He recognizes your white flag easily and swiftly gets up before anyone else can intervene, wiping meticulously at his swim trunks. “I think it’d be best if you left,” he says your first name coldly, but you don’t stick around to hear much else. 

If Jon could, you think the glare he’s currently sending Damian would disintegrate him on impact. He mutters to himself, sounding disappointed as he helps you gather up your things and onto the tender. Damian's long gone, having retired to one of the inside cabins soon after the ordeal ended. 

“I don’t know what came over him,” he confides to you, holding your hand steady as you step down into the tiny boat that's set to take you back to shore.

“Pretty sure it was a Mai Tai.” He gives you an admonishing glance in response that makes you wince. “Yeah... Not my best moment.” It's as close as you’ll get to an apology after all the provoking Damian had done. 

“You both need some time apart, I think.” He looks extremely uncomfortable in the position he’s found himself in as mediator.

This whole situation’s fucking pathetic.

“Like a fucking break up or something. Come on, Jon. You see how ridiculous he’s being!” You throw your arms up dramatically, causing the poor deckhand near the wheel to duck out of the way.

“I know. You’ll just have to let him figure it out.” 

You sigh.

You’ve never fought with Damian like this over all the years and it's definitely left you shaken. 

You look down at the floor of the tender. “Tell him I’m sorry about the drink, I guess.” 

Jon nods, smiling lightly as he addresses you, “I was going to tell him that anyway.” He pats you on the back as he retreats from the loading deck. “Take care of yourself,” he says your name gently as he makes his way back to the main decks, undoubtedly to look for your sulking friend.

You’re chartered back to land. As soon as your feet hit the dock, you make a desperate call.

•••

“Thanks again for picking me up on such short notice,” you say as you shimmy into the passenger seat, smiling at Stephanie behind the wheel. 

She shoots you a grin with thinly veiled worried leaking from it. “Of course! Sorry, I had to bring company.” She winks at the redhead in the back through the rearview mirror. 

“Never apologize for bringing Babs.” You look back to Barbara in the back seat with a tiny smile.

It's been a while since you’ve seen her anyway, so it's as good a chance as any to catch up with the redhead. You’re, admittedly, still getting used to seeing her with a wheelchair in tow.

“Yeah, Steph!” Barbara punches the back of Stephanie's seat playfully. 

“Sorry, sorry!” she giggles. 

“What were you guys up to?”

“Running errands.” They simultaneously glance over your attire and think back to your pissed-off, slightly frantic voicemail you’d left Stephanie half an hour earlier. Surely there has to be some reason for the call and your lack of clothes. “What were you up to?”

“Damian had a yacht thing.”

They glance at each other in the rearview again, sensing something's gone down.

“Sounds fancy,” Babs says.

“Mmm.” 

Another shared look.

“Want to grab something to eat?” Babs changes the subject easily.

“But I’m practically naked,” you complain, gesturing down to your skimpy bikini and crocheted cover-up.

“Oh, trust me, babe. We both noticed.” Stephanie obnoxiously wiggles her eyebrows at your exposed body. “God, you make me wish I was gay sometimes.”

Barbara snorts, “What’s stopping you?”

“That handsome GPD officer I was telling you about,” she sighs dreamily. “I keep running into him and… I don’t know, I just get this feeling about him.”

“What’s his name?” you ask, quirking a brow when Barbara giggles.

“She doesn’t know.”

“Oh, come on, Steph.” You now join in on Babs' giggles. “Does he at least know yours?”

She snorts, “They always do.” The three of you cackle until Stephanie pulls up to an old Mexican restaurant. It's right on the outskirts of Gotham and super close to Jason and Roy’s apartment. “I’m craving Mexican and I’m driving so… Ta da!” She gives you both jazz hands as soon as the car is in park.

“Works for me, but that still doesn’t solve this.” You gesture downward where your tits are barely concealed by the tiny triangles. Your ass isn't much better off.

“I have a pair of stretchy shorts in the back that should fit!” She gets out to grab it while you get out to set up Barbara’s wheelchair. You help lift her into it and nearly drop her when you feel the tie on the left side of your bikini bottom come undone. 

“Damn, Barbara,” she moves to re-tie it for you with a laugh, “if you wanted me naked, all you had to do was ask.” 

She smacks at your hip to signal she’s done trying. “Time and date.” 

You throw your head back and lose it.

“Careful Damian doesn’t hear us." Stephanie comes back around the car to where you and Babs are and hands you the black fabric. "He’s a real possessive one.”

Your smile wanes. “Yeah, figured that out today.”

“Just today?” They both look at you in disbelief.

“What?!”

You put on the shorts Stephanie gave you and tie the crochet cover-up into a wonky tube top over your bikini before heading in with your friends in tow.

Once inside, you order and they immediately begin to dish on your friend.

“So, you’re telling us that you really didn’t know Damian liked you?” They still carry the same incredulous looks they’d worn in the parking lot. “He’s like the weirdest little demon child to ever be spawned and you actually got along with him for literal years. It’d take a fucking miracle for that to happen if he hadn’t somewhat liked you.”

You think back to the night of the Joker incident and how he’d comforted you in a way no one had before. Your stomach knots at the intimate memory of a man whom you don’t even recognize after today. 

“Now you’re gonna tell me you didn’t know Tim liked you,” Barbara jokes lightly before clearing her throat awkwardly. 

She’d been much older than you and Steph, so she hadn’t become as close with either of you as she is now until around senior year. This also means, however, that everything before senior year she’s not as familiar with, hence her not knowing the turmoil you and Stephanie went through when you’d first met. Was it true that all of that initial friction had been inadvertently caused by Tim? 

You can see the hesitancy in Stephanie’s smile, but she eventually nods in agreement, “When Tim and I were dating, I was soo jealous of you.” 

No way.

“I was 15!” you exclaim in shock. 

Tim liked you?!

Of course, you’d looked at Tim that way. He was hot and didn’t think your obsession with heroes was cringy. Regardless, you’d always just assumed he saw you as his younger brother’s nerdy friend. Nothing more. Part of you still doubts he'd ever even looked at you that way, regardless of what Steph and Babs said. 

As for Damian? Well, you knew Damian had liked you at some point with all the, uh, things you’d done, but he definitely didn’t now… right? 

Stephanie shrugs. “You’re hot as fuck and you’ve always had big tits and a fat ass. How could I not be?” 

“I’m starting to think maybe you liked me too,” you tease her, causing her to laugh easily.

“Oh, I for sure did. I just couldn’t recognize it over all the envy,” she shoots you a smirk.

Your food’s just arrived when Barbara looks down at the ringing phone in her hand. She shoots Stephanie with a look she easily reads and quickly gets up in response. “I’m glad we got to catch up, but there’s been a bit of an emergency. Do you have a ride?”

“Sorry to bail like this, but we really have to hurry,” Barbara says, setting down cash and wheeling to the exit. However, Stephanie lingers to hear your answer to her question. 

“Of course,” you lie easily. They’d driven all the way to the state over to save you from Damian’s ire at a moment’s notice. Who are you to stop them? “Can I at least keep the shorts?” 

“All yours, babe!” She gives you a thumbs up and races to meet Barbara by the entrance. “Don’t even bother washing them before you return ‘em!”

You snort at her frat-like humor as they wave a final time and load back into the car. 

You would’ve been heading to Jason and Roy’s in an hour anyway, but you shouldn't be showing up like this. You stare down at your barely covered chest, to your ass that's hanging out of Stephanie’s workout shorts and know it's a dumb idea to walk through the rough side of town like this. You inwardly groan, realizing it’s not like you have a choice in the matter with the way Damian had dropped you. You aren’t upset with Stephanie and Barbara needing to leave like they had when they’d just dropped everything to pick you up, but you can’t help but feel an overall feeling of sinking abandonment. 

You sigh and have the waiter bring you boxes so, at the very least, you won’t have to worry about food for you and Lian. You pump yourself up as you begin your trek along the three blocks it takes to get to Jason and Roy’s place, but not before at least two cars pull over to ask how much you cost. 

You don’t bother to slow down for either car. You try to maintain a steady pace, but the further away from the restaurant and the busy street it lay on, the more uneasiness you feel.

When the Wayne boys had trained you all those years ago, they always reminded you to keep your eyes and ears open in moments like these. They said there's probably a logical reason for you to get an uneasy gut feeling, but nothing seems particularly out of the ordinary. You wave off your worry and continue across the street. 

Two more blocks.

You’re startled in the middle of the crosswalk by the loud, crackling sound of a motorcycle revving somewhere off in the near distance, but quickly pull it together like you hadn’t. You finish crossing the street, hoping you haven't drawn the wrong attention. You know you shouldn’t be jumping at dumb shit like that, especially when the only people you've seen on the streets have all been large groups of men. You think back to the last woman you’d passed, which had been an old lady right outside the corner bodega next to the restaurant two blocks back.

You take a deep breath and hold the food further in front of your cleavage to retain some semblance of modesty, but who are you kidding? It's bad. You look like you've drunkenly dressed yourself for a shift at the strip club and the fewer people that notice, the better.

You can see the corner building to Jason and Roy’s block and break into a light jog. You think you’re home free when you’re suddenly dragged into a dark alley. 

You make to scream, but a grimy, clammy hand hastens itself over your mouth. You don’t give them a chance to get any further as your training kicks in. You drop down out of the hold. The man gasps in confusion, but you don’t give him any more time to react before you pop back up, turning to kick him directly in the balls with a satisfying smush. 

“This one's a fighter, guys.” You’re panting slightly as you watch two more figures approaching from the corners of your vision. Regardless of how scared you are right now, you can't help but smirk at his deduction. "No way, freak's fuckin' into it." 

His fear is all the encouragement you need to give the doubled-over man a psychotic grin he can’t even see from his hurt position. His friends, however, can and make small noises of unease. 

“Oh," your eyes go wild, "you have no idea.” 

You set down the to-go bag gently and shake out your wrists just as the second goon begins a barrage of slow punches. You easily dodge them and parry them with quick, ferocious bursts of fists. 

“Agh!” he exclaims as you drive a hearty punch into his fleshy stomach, sending him backward into the metal casing of a dumpster that lies further down the ally. 

He’s still groaning on the ground, propped up by the dumpster when the two other men gather their wits and team up to attack you simultaneously from both sides. 

You try to remain calm as you prepare yourself for their inevitable attack. 

You wait until they get right on you before lifting off the ground into a split kick that nails both men in the face. The momentum sends each man crashing into the brick ally wall on their respective sides. 

The dude on the ground shuffles to get to his feet, quivering, nearly tripping over his buddies to get away from you in his haste. 

“That’s right! Tell your creepy fucking friends,” you yell after his retreating form. You wait until he's out of sight before spinning into a proud little jump. “Oof!” Upon landing, you run into something extremely hard and extremely smelly. 

You stumble backward, sneezing at the offending scent. When you look up, you startle, quickly distancing yourself from the man in the motorcycle helmet, who smells vaguely of gunpowder.

You squint your eyes up at him, almost immediately recognizing his getup from the news. 

His name isn’t coming to you now, but you know what the costume stands for: Joker. You sure as fuck aren’t sticking around to find out if this guy is affiliated with that creep or not. 

“I think everything’s all good over here,” you hesitantly tell the man who’s yet to talk but is also currently blocking your only way out. 

“What are you doing out here?” 

You startle at his robotic voice and subconsciously take a step back toward the unconscious thugs. “I’m just going home,” you answer in a higher-pitched voice than usual, much to your chagrin.

Lowly goons you can deal with, but dual-wielding gunned, Joker-themed psychopaths? 

Yeah, not so much. 

You put up your hands in a lax surrender, slowly inching toward the bag of food that sits at the base of his ginormous combat boots. On second thought, cooking wouldn’t be too bad, right? You abort your mission, deciding big boy over here can have your stupid Mexican food if it means you don’t have to fight him.

“I won’t hurt you,” comes his robotic reply. 

Regardless of his words, you still feel like a deer in headlights. Your heart stops completely when he reaches near your frozen body to grab the bag. With your breath caught in your throat, you look up. His red helmet comes within centimeters of your face as he offers the bag of food in the direction of your cowering form. 

You stand instantly, finally feeling like you can finally think again once you stand over his still crouching body. You watch as his monstrously thick thighs stretch the fabric of his cargo pants sinfully when he stands, once again gaining ground on you with his incredible height.

“Cool. Thanks,” you say with a forced smile as you attempt to get around his thick, built body. “I’ll be going now, then.” You give a tiny salute but startle, leaving the action suspended mid-air at the sound of one of the men you’d kicked coming to.

It’s also at this moment that the pounding sound of footsteps becomes clearer. In fact, the thunderous noise seems to be rounding the corner when you finally pick up on it.

“There she is! This way.” 

You anxiously look up at the red helmet of the man standing next to you, hoping you can trust him. 

“Follow me.”

It’s all he says and, with your food in tow, you don’t hesitate to do exactly as he says. You trudge along behind his swift pace with your sandals slapping against the slush and muck of Gotham as he leads you deeper into the dark alley systems.

You follow him around an adjacent ally, only to be roughly pushed up against the dirty brick wall.

“Hey!” You push off the wall and against his hard chest, but he easily pushes you back against the bricks. You squirm against his hold, attempting to protest as he covers your entire body with his and searches for whatever sound he’d apparently heard. “Listen, I don’t think it’s that deep,” he shushes you, but you roll your eyes and continue in a slightly lowered voice. “I mean, muggings in Gotham are basically a given. How is this any different?”

He turns his head back to you. “You want me to leave you like this, or what?” he threatens in his robotic voice as he eyes your revealing outfit up and down in the little space that remains between your bodies. “What are you supposed to be anyway? A hooker?”

You think back to the others who’d thought the same and wrinkle your nose in disgust.

“Hey, fuck you, man.” This time, he backs away when you push him off you. “You wish I was.” You pull down Stephanie’s shorts to regain some semblance of modesty, but it’s in vain.

With your head slightly turned to see if the shorts were covering, well, anything you see shadows floating across where you’d just come from. You immediately feel your heartbeat start to tremble. Just what the fuck is going on? Were these dudes really that ass-hurt about getting taken down by a girl?

The helmeted man sees the shadows at the same time you do and wastes no time in taking action.

It’s his turn to snort as he picks a different direction to walk in with a pace you can’t quite meet while walking, so you begin to jog next to him.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

He does slow his pace a bit, though, much to your aching leg's delight and your ego's chagrin. 

You ignore him and continue your best to keep up as you follow behind him. You’re definitely feeling more comfortable around the man after what seemed like genuine concern. “And I think I’d be okay, anyway. I mean, did you see the other guys? Yeah, plural. I totally had them.” 

You walk ahead of him when you finally catch sight of the populated streets that you’d been nabbed from and hasten your pace. 

“Yeah, but add ten more? You’re lucky I even saw you,” he's chastising you, you realize with an incredulous shake of your head. “I almost sped by you on my patrol route until I saw it was you- er an issue... happening.” 

You know he’s right, but you try to play it off. 

If you think about what could've happened for too long, you'll start to spiral back to your other close-call incidents. You shiver, quickly catching yourself, all while hoping he didn’t notice, but his unreadable helmet ultimately reveals nothing. 

Quick to switch the subject, you boop the middle of his red helmet where his nose would be and motion him to take the lead again. “Well, thanks for seeing me and everything, I guess.”

He nods at you, coming to a stop at a parked red motorcycle before boarding it. It reminds you somewhat of Jason’s old one, but this one looks a helluva lot faster. 

You make to get on, but he stops you, grabbing your finger. “No more booping. Get on.”

You hesitate with slight amusement at him saying the word ‘boop.' “Two questions,” he motions for you to hurry the fuck up, “do you have another helmet?” He nods and shuffles around under the seat before producing a black one for you. “Thanks. Okay, second question: are you good or bad?”

He scoffs at your juvenile question, “From your position what does it look like, ba-” 

You don't have time to question him cutting himself off because you suddenly hear the approaching sound of footsteps that've been steadily gaining on you and your unlikely savior. You waste no time in dropping into the remaining space on the seat behind the dude’s massive form and quickly put on the helmet he gave you. 

At least one of your questions had been answered. 

You shove on your helmet and quickly climb on behind his hulking form.

One of the first and last times, you remember bitterly, that you’d been on a motorcycle had been when you skipped school for the first time with Jason and Roy. You don't let the memory linger too long, quickly shaking the embarrassing thought from your head and promising yourself that you will not orgasm on this masked man. 

You blush at your thoughts, thankful he can’t see your flustered expression. “Well, your creepy voice doesn’t help any.”

“Listen, you got on my motorcycle. Might not be the best idea to piss off the driver.” The last part comes out somewhat rushed, like he's worried about something other than the thugs, but what exactly, you don’t understand. Nor do you fully trust yourself to be able to understand the stranger’s tone when it's all coming out robotic anyway. “I did save you, didn’t I?”

He speeds off, easily getting lost in the evening Gotham traffic. After a few turns, you begin to relax, breathing in the cool night air that whizzes by at the insane speed he's zipping around at. 

When you exhale, you feel the weight of the situation release with it, not realizing how much tension you've actually been holding in.

“Save is a big word.”

He just turns his head briefly at you before speeding up, leaving you to tighten your grip around his hard abdomen. 

Do not orgasm, do not orgasm. 

“Whatever you want to call it, but you are on my bike, so how bad could I be?” The bike screeches to a halt suddenly, leaving you to slam uncomfortably into his back as he doubles back in the direction you’d just come from with a grating screech that reverberates throughout the streets. 

You’re absolutely fucking terrified. 

The lack of space between your bodies after his stunt isn't helping your other predicament either. 

“Well,” you begin one of your nerd ramblings to get your mind off of the current situation, “you appear to be the vigilante Red Hood. When he first appeared in comics, Red Hood was the original alias of the man that would later become Joker, but your helmet’s all wrong.” You bravely unwrap one of your arms from around Red Hood’s waist to tap against his helmet. He sharply turns halfway as if to say, “wtf? I’m driving, bro,” but you continue anyway. “Joker’s helmet was originally made from two-way stained red glass, while this is more of a motorcycle fetish look.”

“Glad my outfit finally has a proper label, then,” his robotic voice tones, sarcasm somehow evident, as he makes a sharp turn, seemingly to get back at you. You cling onto him for dear life and peek open one eye over his shoulder to make sure you're still alive before burying your face into his back. 

This is exactly where you stay for the remainder of his little joy ride.

Once he’s back to driving somewhat normally, you start up where you left off, peeling your cheek from the leather of his jacket to peer up at the side of his helmet.  “So, basically, I’m just confused if you’re similar to who you based your outfit off of or not. AKA good or bad?” you repeat your original question to him. 

From what you can remember from things you’ve seen online, it seems like not even the news can pin down this dude’s motive, but then again, you can’t completely remember. 

“My world isn’t so black and white,” you ask what he means, but he doesn’t answer again, instead focusing on slowing down to look around where he’s driven to. “Just tell me where I’m dropping you off, sweetheart.”

You squint your eyes at him, still not completely trusting his motives. “For sure.” 

You’d basically been at their doorstep when you’d been attacked, so now, after his little speeding stunt, you're well on the other side of town. You start pointing in the direction of Jason and Roy’s apartment. Once you get to the general area, you tell him you’re there even though it's actually two blocks early and hop off.

“Thanks again for ‘saving me.’” You use air quotes as you walk up to the random apartment building. “Bye now.” You give a little wave, expecting him to drive off and are perturbed when he just sits there and watches.

The blank look on his helmet does nothing to ease you further. 

Even as you arrive at the keycard access door to an apartment that's not your own and won’t allow access to the keycard you have, he continues to sit there. Waiting. 

Who says chivalry is dead?

A quick glance down shows a seemingly amused(?) Red Hood, though you can't be too sure through the emotionless helmet. You wave to him again and turn around to face the door, pretending to fiddle around your beach bag, but he remains glued to the spot, looking at you with arms crossed. 

What kind of babysitter would you be to bring this potentially dangerous man to the doorstep of their apartment? 

At the same time, you reason, it would be somewhat worse to lead him back to your actual apartment where you lived alone. At least with Roy and Jason’s place, you’ll have two bulky dudes to back you up. 

You sigh and turn around to get back on the bike.

“You ready to tell me where you actually live, babe?”

You narrow your eyes at the familiar nickname, recognizing it to be what he’d cut himself off from saying earlier. Eventually, you get back on the bike albeit hesitantly and gesture further down the street. This time you only take him a block away before you just start walking, hoping he'll just leave. Even as you prepare your backup plan, you know it's complete shit. 

“One more down,” you mutter and wrap your arms back around him as he huffs robotically through the helmet.

“So, you won’t tell me where you live even after all I’ve done? I’m just trying to get you home safe and sound and you, for one, are making it extremely difficult.”

Did he completely zone out your explanation of him wearing Joker’s first costume? Joker’s name alone is enough to send shivers down your spine. After your run-in with the killer, you wanted nothing to do with the psychopath. Considering Joker was this masked man’s whole persona, he doesn’t seem all that trustworthy to you. 

Besides, you hadn’t even needed saving, anyway. You’d taken those three thugs down with ease after what Damian and his family had taught you. 

“Try not to sound so hurt, random vigilante.” You guess that that would be the most accurate term for the man in front of you. His silence seems to indicate his acceptance, at the very least.

“It’s just Red Hood, by the way.” Nevermind, you’d guessed wrong. “Not random vigilante.”

“Cool, whatever,” you say, hopping off his bike for the second time.  

This time, as soon as you reach the door, you turn and shoo him with your hands. 

If he could roll his eyes, you know he would’ve, but he does oblige you in driving off, leaving you with a vast sense of relief. 

“Bye, Red Hood,” you yell after him, then tug your food bag closer to your chest. 

You continue further down a block, hoping he isn’t still following you on his motorcycle, but the lack of revving makes you think the coast is clear, so you scurry home. Well, not home, you correct yourself, blushing at your slip-up. You mean to Jason and Roy's apartment.

Duh... 

Once inside, you're met with Roy and Lian hunched over the stove, making some sort of pasta concoction. You, once again, remind Roy that if he doesn’t want his child poisoned, he needs to let you or Jason do the cooking. 

“The fuck is that?” you ask with a scrunched-up nose. 

Roy smiles wide and lopsided. “Something like a pasta carbonara. Right, Lian?”

The girl nods confidently beside him and continues to stir the haphazard goop around the pan.

“Guess I’ve got Spidey senses for your shi- oot cooking, or something because I grabbed this on my way over.” You set the cold bag of food down on the kitchen island before returning to Roy’s side to give both of them side hugs. “Also, don’t ask about the outfit unless you’re going to give me something to wear,” you warned Roy sternly, who already seemed to be doing his best not to stare at your oddly provocative outfit. 

“Deal,” he responds with a wink as he begins to unload the containers. So much time had passed since you’d left the restaurant that you’d actually forgotten what everyone had ended up ordering. “Wouldn’t wanna ruin the show.”

“Your child is right there, you perv.” Y=You look around the empty apartment. “Where’s Jason, anyway?”

“Seems like you weren’t expecting him.” He points down to the three containers he’d set up. “Or expecting to come over here, at the very least.” He doesn’t try to hide the way his eyes are traveling up the expanse of your body, "Maybe you were, though. That's hot."

“Ah, ah, ah!” You tsk at him. “Give me some clothes, Roy.”

“Ugh,” he groans, slumping off dramatically but returns moments later with one of his oversized slogan T-shirts and a pair of sweats. “Here, go change while I get her fed,” he goes over to where Lian’s attempting to put a fork into one of the styrofoam containers. “Lian, let me at least heat that up for you first!” 

With a chortle, you huddle into the bathroom (that's already regained a bit of its original messiness, by the way) in order to remove your damp suit. You forego Roy’s sweatpants and end up going commando in Stephanie’s shorts and braless in Roy’s ‘World’s Sluttiest Dad’ shirt.

Roy looks up from Lian as you approach and quickly uses his prosthetic hand to cover up his eyes at the sight of you. “Oh, man. Jason’s gonna kill me.” You raise a brow at him and grab the plate he held out for you with his other hand. “Absolutely, utterly kill me.”

“He’ll have to get in line after the night I’ve had,” you tell him about dinner with Barbara and Stephanie and how you figured you were close enough to walk, but then all the thugs. “And, Roy,” you look him dead in the eye, “I kicked ass, like serious ass.” 

“Hey!” Lian’s tiny voice reprimands you, leaving Roy to banish her over to the couch so you two can have a bit more privacy. 

“Sorry!” You shoot Roy another apologetic glance when he rejoins you across the kitchen island, but he’s still focused on your story. “But I totally knocked these three guys out and then this dude in a helmet- Red Hood,” you trail off at Roy’s sudden increase in interest. 

He leans in, “Red Hood, you say?”

“Mhm.” You nod. “He thought I was a hooker,” you laugh at the memory of what Red Hood had asked you.

Roy clasps his hands together. “Okay, so maybe Jason won’t kill me.” You tilt your head in confusion, not seeing the connection at all. “This is good. Anyway, continue,” Roy smiles brightly at you.

“So, remember when we skipped and took Jason’s motorcycle?”

Now, it’s Roy who’s confused. “You mean the time you came all over my arm? How could I forget,” he smirks at the exact same time your heart drops.

Oh, fuck no.

“ROY!” You short-circuit, ultimately forgetting how to function. “No, you did not know that this whole time.”

He grins slyly. “Oh, I didn’t?” he obnoxiously and extremely accurately imitates how you’d bucked back into his crotch and spasmed on Jason’s back with your head thrown back on Roy’s shoulder. “‘Oh, Jason, you’re so angsty and hot with your motorcycle and leather jacket,’” he manages to pitch his voice impressively high. “‘Take me now!’”

You bury your head in your hands with a pitiful whine, “Oh my god, I want to die. I really want to die.” You look up with begging eyes. “Please never ever mention this ever again. Like, EVER,” you beg desperately, looking into Roy’s mirthful green eyes. “I don’t think I can ever come back from this level of embarrassment, dude.”

“Don’t worry. I’m pretty sure Jason’s forgotten about it by now.” The redhead laughs when you when you groan in response.

“Pretty sure?” you mumble pathetically. “A mercenary seems logical at this point, right?” You hide your face in your hands, wishing Roy would just leave for work already, but he's still picking at his plate.

“As long as it waits until we get back home from work, princess.” You quickly forget your shame at the sudden nickname. You still aren’t used to hearing him say your old nickname, but each time he does, you feel like a piece of you is complete. “Speechless? Yeah, I have that effect on the ladies.” You fake gag as he moves to stick his leftovers it in the fridge. “I gotta get heading out, though and you’re here early, so it works out perfectly. Jason’s gonna be mad he missed out on our date, though. That’s for sure.”

You deadpan, “Roy, I’m watching your child for money. It’s like the furthest thing from a date.” 

“For money, you say?” He wiggles his brows obnoxiously referencing your earlier (lack of) outfit. 

“Piss off. Don’t you have to put on your little business suit?” you attempt to tease his usual choice of stained clothes that always he leaves in, complete with those mysterious, heavy duffle bags, but he remains taking you in.

It’s as if he’s peering deep into your soul with just a simple smile and you're embarrassed how quickly he makes you shut down. He’s never looked at you like this before. No, in the past, he never looked at you like he actually saw you, but it seems like he does now. 

It can’t have been anything you’ve said, surely.

“I should probably get ready,” his voice trickles out deep and raspy, causing you to unwittingly gulp under the sudden shift. 

Before you can bask in his attention, he quickly releases you from whatever spell he’d held you under as he walks past you and into the hallway. In his wake, you’re met with a whiff of his rugged scent.

“Don’t forget your briefcase!” you call out to him in an even tone as he leaves the room to change, hoping it covers up just how much you’ve been thirsting over him. You go to the couch to finish eating with Lian, then take your dishes to the kitchen to wash them in the sink as Roy passes behind you in his typical work attire and matching bags. “Sooner or later, I’m going to start thinking you guys are serial killers or something with those heavy-ass bags you carry around,” you say as he unnecessarily passes behind you in the already tight space between the sink and the kitchen island. 

“You’d probably be right,” Roy maniacally cackles and settles into a typical villain pose. “MWAHAHA!”

Lian squeals and runs over to Roy to grab at his cargo pant leg. “No, it’s more like this, dad,” she then proceeds to release her own, much cuter, evil laugh. 

You can’t help but smile at the adorable yet slightly concerning sight in front of you. “Definitely serial killers,” you conclude, trying to ignore Roy’s heat from behind you.

“Be safe. Don’t do anything I would do!” Roy ruffles Lian’s hair and then yours. He walks over to the door and opens it, but Lian refuses to let him leave.

“Love you, dad!” 

“Love you too. Be good.” He smooches her on the head and winks at you one final time. “Live up to my shirt, princess.”

Your face drops instantly. “Way to kill the moment, Roy.”

“Why kill it when we could… alive it?” 

You snort, pushing him out the door, “Go before you lose the rest of your touch.”

“Ask, Jason- it never left, babe. I mean princess.”

You tilt your head slightly at the correction but continue to shoo him off. After all, why would he care about using Jason’s old nickname for you? 

One thing's for certain: you don’t understand anything concerning the two of them in the slightest.

A/N: is it getting hot in here??? hope u have a good day/ night!!

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[yesyourstalker]

Neta: so I went to the doctor right. And he looks at the mole and he's like 'oh yeah that's melanoma all right' like he was so fucking casual about it too I love us hehe

Candi: Tell me how I had one on my fucking butt hahahahahaha! left butt cheek I was kind of sad they removed it cuz it looked like a heart.

Neta: I'm so lucky that thing wasn't on my tattoo. I would have died!! Hahahahah God I'm so jealous of these kids nowadays, they don't have to deal with this shit. I told my daughter 'oh when you get to a certain age you have to check your body for weird moles' and I remember she was on the surface since she was 6 so that doesn't really apply to her. Cod these fucking kids.

Candi: I have this old giant can of sunscreen you know the one they used to have them in tin cans.

Neta: uh huh. Captain Coral sunblock I still have some and my bathroom cabinet

Candi: yeah those. I pulled it out in the park to put it on Bowie.......these fucking surface dweller moms. You know the bitches from the fucking canyons

Neta: oh shit...

Candi: This mom came up to me tapped me on my shoulder and told me "I think that stuff is expired and it's full of toxins you shouldn't put that on your kid"

Neta: not the toxins! HA! what the fuck hahahahahahaha

Candi: I swear if my husband wasn't there I would be in jail

Neta: I would have had a fit! They think everything from the underground is toxic where did that even come from?!

Warabi: are you guys going to help pick out nice furniture or are you just going to sit there and gossip all day!!

Neta: you only invited me is because I get a military discount!

Candi: I agreed because I need to do my own shopping.

_____________________________________________

Neta: I was thinking like a nude wedding cake. He not into sweets all that much

Candi: yeah he does look like someone who doesn't like sugar

Neta: yeah he's boring that's why I fucking love him. I was thinking a chiffon cake would be nice like this one.

Candi: ohhhhh that was really nice I like the detailing it's really nice- *gasp*.... Oh my God look at this!

Neta: ohhh That's so sweet little cuttlefish on it you need to get that..... Do you know what you're going to paint the room?

Candi: I was thinking of-

Warabi: Neta come and lie on this mattress with me!

Neta: no!

Warabi: please!!

Neta: no!!

Warabi: please!!!

Neta: no!!!

Warabi: I won't make it weird I promise

Neta: I don't believe you but okay. Ugh.................. This is nice. A little too soft for me personally but it's comfortable.

Warabi: I like the mattress but mahi likes to sleep on slabs of fucking stone........ You're really close.... it's kind of like that time when we kiss-

Neta: and you made it weird I'm getting up...*ugh*.... just get separate mattresses

Warabi: two separate beds.... I don't know

Neta: it'd be nice, just get two separate beds maybe separate the loft into two living spaces.

Warabi: that would be nice...... Let me call mahi.

_____________________________________________

Neta:I was thinking of something like this. it's closer to the floor. It also has a built-in bookshelf and some drawers.

Candi: ehhh it's nice it's very.... Minimalist

Neta: I like minimalism I think it's a nice aesthetic

Candi: hmmm is it though

Neta: I don't know maybe because I used to live in squalor so you know sterile environments are comforting for me

Candi: That's valid.....maybe if it was a darker wood.....if you stain it it'll look better

Neta: huh .... yeah that could work .....sounds like a plan ... I order it later

Warabi: I'm sorry but we're buying furniture for myself! For my apartment! Can you guys please pretend to care and help! Why are you even buying new furniture now anyway you said you're going to move after getting married what's the point in wasting the money like???

Neta: first off you have been looking at coffee tables for the last hour and you're one to talk about wasting money!! Go call mahi or something I'm busy fuck!

Warabi: *huff*

Candi: why do you need to get a new bed frame?

Neta: the one I have is broken

Candi: ohhhhh Netaaa hehehehe what did you do to break the bed frame

Neta: gained 50 lbs

Candi: *pppffth*

Neta: hehehe yeah.... Oh and having an active sex life.

Candi: oh realllly

Neta: yeah we're suuuuupppperrr active almost every night............. My man has the libido of a devout nun

Candi: HA! You're going to get yourself in trouble hehehehe

Neta: I love him tho....don't tell him I said that.....being serious though I actually bought it broken for cheap.

Candi: no wonder your back so fucked

Neta: yeah.......Did you get the link to those wedge pillows I sent you?

Candi: I have in my cart I need to get them before I start blowing up like-

Warabi: ok which swatch do you think would go great for the living space I was thinking of a nice burgundy but this blue is speaking to me.

Candi: I like orange

Neta: get it in green

Warabi: Cod you two are no help!!!

_____________________________________________

Neta: Cod I'm starving

Candi: you know what I could eat right now

Neta: absolute garbage... Like shit from shanty's

Candi: Yes exactly like I want their lobster bisque pasta on a roll.

Neta: I could go for a prawn patty.... With pickled kelp .....*gasp*.... Oh my Cod.... No ..... Is that? Phoebe sweetie!

Phoebe: neta! Netanetanetanwta hiiiiiiiii heheheh

Neta: Hi sweetie! Awwww look at you!!! You've gotten so big!! Ohhh big hugs!

Phoebe: uhhhhehehe hi hi!!

Candi: oh Hi Phoebe!

Phoebe: Candis!! Hi Candis!!

Candi: aww what are you doing here baby?

Phoebe: my.... Mommy is in the store!! She buys shoes and clothes and panties and necklaces!!

Neta: oh she is? She left you here to play?

Phoebe: yes I like.. I like to open the re-frige-rators and the washie machines

Neta: oh you do? That sounds like fun

Phoebe: yeah..... . I like hiding in the curtains!!! scare people!!!

Candi: you do? How do you scare people?

Phoebe: like this!!......(hopping)... BOO RAWR WAR WAR !!!

Neta: heheheh she is so precious!!

Candi: ohhhhh she is

Phoebe's mom( in the distance): sweeties time to go!!

Phoebe: MOMMY!!!!..... Bye bye neta!! Bye bye Candis!!!

Neta: bye bye!....*sigh* I miss when my little girl was like that

Candi: I know what you mean my little Bowie growing out of it right now it's breaking my heart

Neta: makes you want to have another kid doesn't it?

Candi:* inhale* *exhale*................... No

Neta: (wheeze)

_____________________________________________

Neta: look at this cool bath tub. It has a water jet massager.. with 12 settings.. I know this isn't made for ink fish but I'd risk it

Candi: I feel like my Donn wouldn't know how to get out and die in a very embarrassing way.

Neta: hahahaha he would die in a bath tub!!

Warabi: I'm fished shopping.. here's your military card... Thanks for helping me.......I guess

Neta: hooray!! let's see what you got...... Two dressers, nightstands .... The dining set looks nice perfect for four people. One mattress?

Warabi: they're buying their own mattress by themselves

Neta: alright

Candi: a mini sectional.. that's cute

Warabi: yep I bought most of the expensive stuff now mahi and Baja are going to buy the rest of the furniture and this own shit. The store is going to hold onto it until Baja shows up with the truck.....*sigh* I'm hungry.

Neta: fucking finally it's starving!

Candi: same here I really need to eat something and sit....*huff* I'm tired. Neta take my card can you buy my things? thank you

Neta: sure

Warabi: *humpf*

_____________________________________________

Candi: *sigh*........ I could go for a nap right about now.

Warabi:.... I'm going to order some food you said you wanted a lobster bisque roll?

Candi: yeah.

Donn: hey babe

Bowie: Mommy!

Candi: Hi my precious little baby boy! [Kisskisskiss] Hi hubby [kiss]

Donn: how you feeling?

Candi: just a little fatigued but I'll live.

Donn:.. ok.... What did you get?

Candi: just a chair, some shelves I found a really nice swing-

Neta: alright everything is bought and packed up heres your card back and car keys. Heeeey Donnie how you doing lover boy.

Donn:....... Neta... It's nice seeing you

Bowie: Mr Neta!

Neta: hey little man! You're behaving for your mom and dad right?

Bowie: hehehehe yeeees!!!!

Neta: alright.. Y'all get settled.. I'm gonna check on my subordinate upstairs. I'll be right back.

Warabi: okay I got your lobster bisque on a roll prawn patty for neta.. My lobster dog.. i. I got you something to drink. hyperade raspberry lemonade your favorite.

Candi: you can have it, it's starting to give me indigestion plus I can't have caffeine not for a while anyway.

Warabi: oh ok...why ?

_____________________________________________

Neta: and he gave all of his old stuff to Baja which is nice but I feel like he only did that just to buy new stuff.

Mahi: well his parents did give him a little bit of his freedom back he has access to a savings account. I feel like they're testing him and he's failing horribly but you know it's not my place to say anything.

Neta: ehhh it's a lesson that he has to learn himself. So how's Seth doing?

Mahi: He's doing great, doing his job piercing ears and belly buttons all day.

Neta: I'm going to check on him............ Hey Seth? (taping chair) you doing good kid?

Seth: ...[signing]...I'm doing just fine boss! A lot of great clients today!

Neta: alright... You work tomorrow and Monday at the same time. That's today we're going to put you in the system so you'll get your schedule through your phone okay?

Seth: [signing] All right cool I left my portfolio in your office along with a copy of my tattoo license. You have some cool tattoos, Hope there's some space for my work.

Neta: ohhh we'll see, we'll see. Keep up the good work let me head to my office and-

Warabi: SHE'S PREGNANT!!!?!?!?

Neta:........................

Mahi: duh.

Seth: [signing] what did he say? what happened?

Neta: *sigh* .......he just found out why I needed to hire a new piercer.... Sorry about him.......you'll get used to all of this eventually. Trust me. It's never a dull moment in this store

Seth: [signing] I'm having fun already

_____________________________________________

Warabi: so everyone knew everyone but me!

Mahi: yeah pretty much she told me last week when she came in late....

Neta: she sent me a pic of a pregnancy test at 2:00 a.m.

Candi: I also posted it on my splattube channel and my squidtter and my inksagram. You don't follow me on any social media I thought we were friends

Warabi: I am! I am your friend! My FYP is full of so many people right now... I can't even find my mutuals......Cod if I knew I wouldn't have let you help me with buying furniture now I feel like an asshole!!

Candi: hehehehe it's fine it's really I wanted to go cuz... I needed to buy new furniture too I might as well kill two birds with one stone.

Warabi: no feel bad let me get you something, anything you want.

Candi: oh don't need to

Donn: a new crib would be nice, one that turns into a bed like we have for Bowie.

Warabi: Done! What color?

Candi: uhhh what color did we agree

Donn: I like the Corel paint you picked

Candi: ok Coral it is.

Warabi: Great!.......I can't believe you're going to have another baby! We're practically the same age and it feels weird! You're too young

Candi: I'm 27

Warabi: exactly it's way too young to raise a kid Neta how old were you when you had a kid?

Neta: 19

Warabi: ok well you're a bad example. anyway I'll get you the crib I promise.

Candi: awww thank you

_____________________________________________

🎶Mahi maha Mahi ha ha 🎵🎵 belongs to @fish-at-fish-fish-resort

[lighthouseas]

🌻

10 very simple beach tips from someone who lives by the beach (NOTE: this is a northeastern usamerican perspective. and also. there is probably some i'm missing because i am only listing 10)

1. do NOT feed the seagulls. don't do it. begging you not to feed them.

2. close your food if you're at the beach (hence why it's better to just bring your own food instead of buying it because 1. it's usually way overpriced and 2. you can usually close it in a cooler or bag if you do so the seagulls don't get to it.)

3. don't fuck around with sunscreen/sunblock. "i don't need it, i just tan 🥺" yes you do. the rays are still absorbing into your skin and that is bad for you & how you get skin cancer. and make sure to reapply too. EVEN ON CLOUDY DAYS. and that you have someone to get your back, including under your bathing suit straps if you have them. they move around, so it's really common for people to get burned there.

4. stay hydrated!!! bring a big bottle of water, seltzer, WHATEVER (preferably water but i know some people don't like the taste of it, so whatever will keep you hydrated works) because i promise you that being in the hot sun and swimming in saltwater will dehydrate the fuck out of you if you don't have water. no getting heat exhaustion or heatstroke on my watch!!

5. adding onto that. look up heat exhaustion and heatstroke symptoms. if you start getting a little TOO hot, grab something cold and press it to your neck or wrist. this should cool you down very fast!

6. if a wave is coming and you don't want to get a face full of it (provided that the wave is moderately sized and not. ginormous) turning to the side and letting your hip get the brunt of it will usually deflect it.

7. don't go out too far in the ocean if you are uncomfortable. oceans are more dangerous than pools. if you don't feel like you can go out deep, then don't. don't let anyone pressure you into doing otherwise.

8. put the ocean life back where you found it <333 the crabs are very cute yes but they do not like sitting in a bucket for 3 hours. take them out, look at them a little, and then set them free.

9. if you ever get caught in a rip current, do NOT swim against it. that is how you drown. either yell for help (the lifeguard will hear you or see you anyway) or swim parallel to the shore in order to try and get out of it.

10. don't go to the beach alone!!! there are many reasons for this: someone to help you apply sunscreen, someone to be there in case there are creeps around, etc. etc. just. don't go alone okay :) and i know a lot of this sounded pretty grim but i promise the beach is actually very fun as long as you're being safe !!

ask game

[eroticcannibal]

Low key this is embarrassing but I never learned a lot of normal people things. What sunblock do you use? How often is often enough to apply? How much SPF is good? Someone the other day told me I was supposed to wear it inside too and I can't tell if they were teasing me.

Is the sun really trying that hard to kill us? How tf did we even adapt to survive this long?

Im sorry this got LONG but I am giving you the info

Ok so I personally use soltan, its reasonably priced and broad spectrum. Whats best for you may depend where you are, be CAREFUL if you live in the US as many sunscreens lack broad spectrum protection or proper indicators to tell you if it has proper broad spectrum protection. At least last I checked it does not appear to be standardised like it is in other countries. (Someone pls let me know if this has changed or if there are any individual states that regulate this better)

You should reapply every 2-3 hours i think and after getting out of water if you go swimming. Yes its a lot. If you *have* to cheat, avoid direct sun, reduce how much you expose your skin. Also use mineral sunscreen if you are wearing makeup. Also grab yourself UV sunglasses and a big hat.

Aim for 50 spf AND 5 starts/whatever other indicators are relevant to where you live. Spf is sun protection factor, or in simple terms "how much extra time do I have before I burn". Stars are an indicator of how much UVA and UVB is absorbed in comparison with each other. This is important because not all sun damage is visible. If its got 5 stars you know that if you are applying sunscreen properly to avoid sunburn, that same level of protection applies to the unseen damage too.

Yes you should wear sunscreen indoors, and also year round. I understand this is quite demanding so again if you need to cheat: cover up in cooler weather, denim will block everything guaranteed. Do not be fooled by the season, if the sun is there it can still get you. When indoors, be mindful of how much sunlight is in your house and where you spend your time. If you want to spend a whole day lounging with the curtains open, consider doing it away from windows that get direct sunlight. Also consider your window coverings (also if its hot you may want to keep blinds and curtains closed anyway to reduce the heat indoors, so 2 birds one stone). If you are truly paranoid and also lazy like me, get yourself a sun lamp and never open your curtains 😂. But just closing curtain on the side the sun is on can do a lot to reduce how much sun is getting indoors. And again proper clothing can help you indoors.

If you wanna be super duper cheaty you can keep an eye on the UV index and also avoid peak sunshine between 10 am and 4 pm. Heres what the UV index can tell you:

Low, 0-2: At the low stage, experts advise you to wear sunglasses if the sun is bright. Use sunscreen and protective clothing if you burn easily.

Moderate, 3-5: At the moderate stage, you should cover up and use sunscreen. Avoid direct sunlight at midday, when the sun is most powerful. Stay in the shade.

High, 6-7: At the high stage, you should use all protection against sun damage (protective clothing, wearing a hat and sunglasses, using sunscreen). Limit time in the sun from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m.

Very high, 8-10: At the very high stage, you should be extra careful, using clothing, hats, sunscreen and sunglasses. Avoid the sun between 10 a.m. and 4 p.m. Your skin can burn quickly at this stage.

Extreme, 11+: At the extreme stage, you should use all methods of prevention. It will only take minutes of exposure to result in a burn. Don’t go out in the sun from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Wear protective clothing, a hat, sunglasses and sunscreen. At this stage and all others, remember that snow, sand and water all increase UV exposure by reflecting the sun’s rays."

The sun IS a deadly lazer and the only reason we have survived as a species is because we only need to live long enough to reproduce and you can get that done before the skin cancer gets you. Its cumulative damage, so being lazy from time to time and cutting corners won't kill you on its own, but do it enough and it might catch up to you eventually, if you cut enough corners and live long enough. (And you don't have to be terribly old, the peak age is 85-89 but rates go up sharply at 20-24.)

But ANOTHER thing you can do to protect yourself is check your skin and learn the signs of skin cancer. Early detection is KEY and makes it very survivable (close to 100%!), especially for dark skinned people who tend to have lower rates of survival due to later detection! There is basal cell carcinoma, squamous cell carcinoma and melanoma. The last is the most dangerous, accounting for 75% of skin cancer deaths and is caused by sun burn type damage.

"Basal cell carcinoma may appear as a small, smooth, pearly or waxy bump on your face or neck, or as a flat, pink/red- or brown-colored lesion.

Squamous cell carcinoma can appear as a firm, red nodule or as a rough, scaly, flat lesion that may itch, bleed and become crusty.

Melanoma usually appears as a pigmented patch or bump. It may resemble a normal mole, but usually has a more irregular appearance."

Some more on Melanoma:

"When looking for signs of melanoma, think about the alphabet. ABCDE tells you what signs to look out for on moles or lesions on your skin:

Asymmetry: The shape of one half doesn’t match the other.

Border: Edges are ragged or blurred.

Color: Uneven shades of brown, black, tan, red, white or blue.

Diameter: A significant change in size (greater than 6 millimeters).

Evolution: Changes in the way a mole or lesion looks or feels (itchy, bleeding, etc.)."

If in doubt, ask your doctor, also take pictures of any suspect moles so you can compare them over time. Very helpful if, like me, you are covered in hundreds of moles. Very tough to keep track of lmao.

And remember UVC FILTERING SUNSCREEN IS A MARKETING SCAM

I hope that is everything u need pls feel free to bother me again

[queen-ofnewyork]

Review of B.LAB's Matcha Hydrating Real Sun Screen SPF50+ PA++++

B.LAB is a Korean nature-oriented brand that provides comfort to tired skin. They're also known for high-quality products made from natural ingredients. Their Matcha Hydrating Real Sun Screen is a chemical sunscreen designed to hydrate and protect skin without feeling greasy. Key ingredients include: 940ppm of green tea leaf water (toning, soothing, hydrating, antibacterial, anti-inflammatory, anti-aging), ice plant extract (antioxidant, moisture-rich, hydrating, strengthens skin barrier), terephthalylidene dicamphor sulfonic acid (chemical filter, anti-aging, provides effective protection from UVA rays), diethylamino hydroxybenzoyl hexyl benzoate (chemical filter, ideal for protection against UVA rays, extremely skin safe for all skin types) and niacinamide (whitening, lightening, anti-aging, rejuvenating, anti-wrinkle). This product retails for between $10-15 USD, you can get it here for $14.40 + shipping. Currently, you can get it on sale for $6.29 + shipping.

Ingredients

Water, Dibutyl Adipate, Methylpropanediol, Alcohol Denat., Terephthalylidene Dicamphor Sulfonic Acid, 1,2-Hexanediol, Ethylhexyl Triazone, Glycerin, Niacinamide, Polysilicone-15, Tromethamine, Polyglyceryl-3 Distearate, Caprylyl Methicone, Cetearyl Alcohol, Diethylamino Hydroxybenzoyl Hexyl Benzoate, Dipropylene Glycol, Polymethylsilsesquioxane, Palmitic Acid, Stearic Acid, Bis-Ethylhexyloxyphenol Methoxyphenyl Triazine, Glyceryl Stearate, Potassium Cetyl Phosphate, Polyether-1, Carbomer, Ammonium Acryloyldimethyltaurate/VP Copolymer, Glyceryl Stearate Citrate, Caprylic/Capric Triglyceride, Acrylates/C10-30 Alkyl Acrylate Crosspolymer, Camellia Sinensis Leaf Water (940ppm), Ethylhexylglycerin, Adenosine, Butylene Glycol, Menthyl Lactate, Ethyl Menthane Carboxamide, Methyl Diisopropyl Propionamide, Mesembryanthemum Crystallinum (Iceplant) Extract, Pentylene Glycol, Caprylyl Glycol

This sunscreen contains 50 ml (1.69 oz) and is fragrance-free.

The sunblock has a very light cream texture and feels a little wet on the skin.

It blends out really easily and really doesn't feel like a sunscreen.

It absorbs quickly and leaves skin really hydrated and not overly tacky.

There's no flashback or noticeable white cast at all under flash.

Recommended use is to apply the sunscreen and smooth it over the skin and blend and tap into the skin for better absorption. This brand is cruelty-free and uses clean ingredients, it's also fragrance-free. After using, I do personally have somewhat sensitive skin and some sunscreens really irritate my eyes, I did notice a bit of tingling due to the menthyl lactate in the ingredients but otherwise no issues around my eye area. I also have dry skin and I think this works great without any added moisturizer underneath, but it also layers well and does a good job underneath makeup, no pilling at all. There's not really any scent of ingredients that I've noticed too much and of course, it's free of artificial fragrance. The thing that really sticks out to me in Korean and Japanese sunscreens is that you can put these on your lips and not have that kind of unpleasant sunscreen taste. The ingredients are great, minus a couple of ingredients. The cooling tingle is noticeable but not terrible or overly irritating for me, but if you can't handle anything like that, then best to avoid this one. I'd recommend this to anyone with dry and dehydrated skin, people who have sensitive skin, and people who need a lightweight formula.

What I like: I'd like to make it clear, this sunscreen is probably my favorite that I've ever tried and I feel like I don't hear people talking about it. It's also very affordable and I do actually wish they'd make a version with 100 ml. I enjoy the texture and it works so well under makeup. What I don't like: the slightly cooling tingle could irritate very sensitive skin.

Pros:

Moisturizing

Hydrating

Gentle

Layers well

No pilling

Safe around the eyes

Lovely formula

Great texture

Affordable

Smooths over the skin so nicely

Fragrance-free

Cons:

Has a couple irritants

Would I buy this again?

Yes, for sure

Rating: 10/10

[catreginae]

Is vampire Wars's outfit any different from canon Wars? How so? Does he carry anything different in his bag?

🦇

His outfit is mostly the same, he just has the addition of a cloak that he sometimes uses when he needs extra protection from the sun (if they find themselves in an area that's sunny and doesn't have a lot of shade). I haven't given it a colour yet, though, since his only stipulation was that it had to match his scarf.

His bag has the in-universe equivalent of sunblock that he applies mostly on his face and ears, and he has some aloe for the sunburns if they happen to be minor. Neither helps him much, but they are better than nothing. In the very least, the aloe feels nice when his skin is feeling kinda hot.

However, writing this, I feel like somebody should make him some goggles. The light doesn't always bother his eyes, but sometimes his eyes do hurt because they are photosensitive and the cloak doesn't always help. He doesn't complain about his eyes though, so whether the chain has noticed him squinting a lot sometimes is up in the air.

[rakysglowup]

My Top 3 Sunscreens

You will notice that most of the sunscreens I mention are from Korean brands. I will explain later why I'm so biased towards their products, Okay! let's start with the first one that made me fall in love with Korean sunscreens This was my introduction to Korean skincare products 🫶

COSRX - Aloe Soothing Sun Cream SPF50+/ PA+++

This has to be one of the best sunscreens out there. As a beginner in Korean skincare, this product had everything I needed: no white cast, no smell, vegan ingredients, and a moisturizing feel. You can see the results right away when you apply it. I used this product non-stop for 2 to 3 years, always buying two at a time to avoid running out. It's pretty small, to be honest (Size: 1.69 fl. oz / 50ml), but it's worth it. Just as their official website describes, the sunscreen is "Formulated with Aloe Arborescens Leaf Extract, the daily soothing sunblock is so lightweight that it feels like a moisturizer, and it does not leave any white cast." (COSRX Aloe Soothing Sun Cream SPF50 PA+++, 50ml / 1.69 fl.oz | COSRX.COM, n.d.). See? Awesomeness in a bottle. This sunscreen is ideal for mixed and dry skin types. As someone with mixed skin, I can tell you that it made my skin look glowy just by applying it. However, I have a warning: COSRX has had this sunscreen out of stock for a while now, and I'm afraid they might discontinue it. #FreeAloeSoothingSunCreamCOSRX

Tocobo Watery Day Cream

If you haven't guessed yet, this is another Korean brand, and it is my current sunscreen. I think this is my fourth time using it in a row. I stick with it because it feels watery and doesn't feel like you're wearing sunscreen. Plus, it doesn’t leave a white cast. I'm a pro-No-White-Cast girl. This sunscreen feels more like a light moisturizer compared to the COSRX one. It's perfect for oily skin, and if you have mixed skin like me, you can use it as well. I tend to use this sunscreen when I wear heavy makeup so my face doesn't feel overloaded. According to their website, the sunscreen is, "Cruelty-FREE & VEGAN certification: Mild formula using naturally derived ingredients makes skin comfortable." This sunscreen has a lot of ingredients, making it not just an SPF, but a light moisturizer as well.

Beauty of Joseon Sunscreen Relief Sun

This sunscreen contains 30% rice extract and grain-fermented extracts, providing moisture and nourishment to the skin, making it super moisturizing. I used it only once because it seems better suited for dry skin. It worked well on me; I didn't need an additional moisturizer, and it left my skin glowing. Due to its ingredients, I highly recommend this sunscreen if you have dry skin and want to show off a radiant complexion. I cant say much about this one, it just glows all over the place ✨

Let me know if you would like to know about any other products. Stay tuned for more reviews!

[readyforthegarden]

“is it worth it, risking everything just for a chance” with josh pls pls pls

AND we're back with the fluff, thank you anon! There's a liiiiiittle but of adult situation involving sunscreen and rubbing it in...take that as you will.

46. “Is it worth it? Risking everything just for a chance.”

You were exhausted. So incredibly exhausted. But you were the happiest you think you'd ever felt. An entire week in the wilderness with your best friends, hiking, swimming, drinking, smoking and dancing in the moonlight was just what you needed.

You were laying on a large picnic blanket in the grassy "yard" behind the house, halfway between the dock on the lake and the house itself. You had a small bowl full of fresh, crunchy grapes and a bottle of water next to you as you read the book you'd brought with you. The sun soaked into your skin between the pieces of your bathing suit, giving you a warm feeling all over.

"Got any sunblock?" you looked back, seeing Josh walking towards you. He was shirtless, his swim trunks low on his hips. You grabbed the bottle of sunscreen next to you and tossed it to him. He thanked you as he caught it, and began slathering his body with the lotion. You turned back to your book, humming out a small message to him.

"Don't forget your face, Josh." you turned the page of your book. "You always burn there first." you knew Josh like the back of your hand. The two of you had been inseparable in middle school, and although you both took different paths in high school and after, the two of you remained close. There was always a small spark between the two of you, but neither of you ever really acted on it, so you figured it was just that the two of you were of a flirty nature.

"Thanks." he rubbed some excess sunscreen on his cheeks and nose. You turned to make sure he was doing it and tsk'd.

"That's not enough." You sat up, taking the bottle from him and putting some in your hand and rubbing them together before wiping them on his face. He let you rub the sunscreen in, only humming in slight annoyance when you rubbed some one his forehead and got a bit in his curls. You took the rest and rubbed it onto the back of his neck, knowing damn well he missed that spot too. "There, that's better."

"You know, you're starting to look a little red." Josh nodded towards you. You looked at your shoulders, seeing a slight pink tinge. "Can I return the favor?" you nodded, turning and laying back down again, listening to Josh kneel next to you. After a few moments, you felt cold lotion being pressed to your back and you jolted. "Sorry, sorry!" Josh apologized. He began to rub the lotion in, rounding your shoulders and applying a little pressure as he moved down your back, ghosting over the ties of your top.

"Josh, that feels really good." your voice was a low groan. It'd been a while, longer than you'd like to admit, since you'd been touched in anyway. If the sun wasn't melting you, Josh's hands definitely were.

"You can't talk like that." Josh sighed, his voice kind of whiny. "Please." you lifted your head, glancing behind you. You saw the affect the combination of him touching your body and your voice had on him, and bit your lip.

"Josh, I'm sorry." you sat up, turning to face him. You strained to keep your eyes from the bulge in his swim trunks. "I-I didn't mean.."

"It's okay." Josh bit his lip. Your eyes locked for a few moments.

"I should get back inside. I've been out here for a while anyway." you stood up, grabbing your water and book, hearing him groan from behind as you realized you basically shoved your ass in his face. "I'm sorry!" you started to rush off towards the house.

"Your grapes!"

"Keep them! Enjoy!" you shouted back. Once you were back in the cabin, you beelined for your room, bumping into Sam, who was wearing a very telling smirk.

"You two just need to makeout or something." he said, biting into an apple.

"Sam!" you swatted his arm. "Shut up!"

"You know I'm right!" he called after you as you closed the door to your bedroom. You sat on your bed, willing your heart race to settle down.

☀️ ☀️ ☀️

You followed behind your friends as you made your way through the fairgrounds. It was dark, and lucky the guys hadn't really been noticed enough for anyone to stop them. You had told your best friend, Ally about your interaction with Josh earlier, after discussing the possibility of a relationship with him, you'd pushed it to the back of your mind. You'd built such a beautiful friendship with him, you couldn't stand to see it go up in flames if something went wrong.

Ally glanced at you as she walked ahead, her hand tightly intwined with Danny's and you gave her a smile, letting her know you were fine. You watched as a father won a prize for his little girl at a booth, the girl jumping up and down when she was handed the stuffed animal.

"You want one?" your head whipped around, and Josh was standing next to you.

"Yeah, I want the giant hot pink gorilla." you pointed across the way at another booth. "It'll fit in the car, right?"

"Oh for sure." Josh laughed. "Um, about earlier.."

"It's okay, Josh." you held up your hands. "Really, I promise."

"The thing is, it's not." Josh sighed. "I'm not embarrassed that it happened. It's a natural reaction to touching a beautiful girl, and I did let myself get carried away a bit..and this isn't the way I wanted to do this, but Y/N, I do have feelings for you."

You stared at Josh as he spoke. Many times over, you'd laid in bed and wondered what it would be like if the two of you ever acted on any feelings you had. Would he profess his love with a poem? Maybe force Jake to help him write a love ballad and perform it for you? Scribble it in a note and put it in your mailbox for you to find when you go through the mail after work?

But in the middle of a county fair on vacation, with hundreds of people milling about around you wasn't at all how you expected it. And to be honest, you never thought your reaction would be fear.

"Josh..." you took his hand, pulling him behind a tent and holding his hands tightly in yours. "You're my best friend, we've built such an amazing relationship since we were kids."

"And we can keep building that." Josh implored, squeezing your hands. "Friendship doesn't end just because we start seeing each other romantically." you bit your lip, searching his eyes.

"What if something happens?" you asked. "What if you meet someone way more interesting out on tour, or I get lonely at home and one of us does something terrible. What if we get into an awful fight and break up and hate each other."

"I know that I would never, ever do anything that would hurt you." Josh told you, letting go of your hands and placing his own on your waist securely. He wasn't trying to pull you in, but only showing you his promise in how he held you, as if you were a precious gemstone. "And if we have a problem, we may fight, and it may be awful. But I will always, always try everything I can to work it out. You will too, I know it." you nodded, feeling more and more reassured, and you could tell Josh could feel it, his fingers tapping on your sides lightly.

"All of the years of fun and laughter, fights and vacations and everything..." you whispered, looking for one last reassurance. "Is it worth it? Risking everything just for a chance?" Josh grinned, now pulling you closer, touching his nose to yours.

"If it means a lifetime with you, it's worth everything." he murmured. You broke out in a grin, nodding in agreement. Josh leaned in, his lips puckered slightly, about to place a kiss to your own when a loud screech went off, followed by a pop and fizzle as fireworks burst overhead. "Perfect timing."

"Our first kiss under the fireworks at a county fair..." you mused, glancing back to Josh as the green lights sparkled in his eyes as they burst in the sky. "Sounds like the beginnings of a good country song." Josh shook his head, cupping your face in one of his hands as he kept the other on your waist, and finally planting that kiss on you.