#i need tags to organzie things so i can find them when i want

[groupie-inspired]

The meet & greet

I was just thinking over how I ended up wanting to be a groupie in the first place and I am having all these flashbacks of stuff I did when I was younger. Here is one of those stories.

The summer before my freshman year (I was 13), my best friend S and I decided to go to a Shane Dawson meet and greet in the city. It was in a Barnes and Noble. In order to get in, you had to get a color coded wristband and buy at least one signed book. The problem was, my friend’s dad was NOT about that getting up early stuff at that moment so I was responsible for securing our wristbands. Let me tell you, this was a fucking ordeal. My dad and I get there at around 6:00... the line is already around the block. Mind you, this an NYC block— not a normal block. I’m thinking, oh shit. I get in line and my dad stays off to the side. I end up speaking with some girls and we’re all like chatting and one girl recorded me for her vlog. I never did get to see that vlog, though. It’s hard for me to describe this part of the story because it was like a never ending expanse of nothingness. It was a line. All I remember, is that the disorganization of the whole thing was immediately clear. I don’t remember the exact details of when the doors were meant to open, but all of the sudden some girls (I mean boys were there but not as many) are walking out with their books and red wristbands. That means they were the first in, but no one was supposed to be let in yet. Then things stop for a really long time and I’m like. Omg.

Fast forward, this goes on for multiple hours. FINALLY, I somehow am inside. I think I cut it pretty close because my wristband was purple, and if the first girls had red ones this was a ROYGBIV situation. I knew going in though, that it was only supposed to be people who were there who got wristbands. I had to somehow get another wristband out of the cashier. I get mine and put it on, and my dad says to him, “Her brother isn’t feeling well so he didn’t come to wait on line, can we have another for him?” The guy experienced some hesitation but overall was really nice, so his attitude was, “I’m not supposed to do this, but if you buy two books I’ll give it to you.” My friend wanted a book anyway, so we were golden. Boom. I got it. I go home for a few meager hours of rest before I have to go back again for our time slot.

My friend’s dad and her meet me at my house. There’s a bus stop around the corner, and we wait there until we catch the bus into the city. Once we get there, the situation gets really chaotic. It was the end of July so it was HOT as FUCK out. But we aren’t at that point in the story just yet.

Naturally, we go and sit inside the store. Her dad left to do something for a minute so we were just there on the floor. A girl with winged eyeliner and frizzy blonde hair comes up to me. “Hey, how did you get a wrist band?” In hindsight, knowing what I know now, I’m pretty sure this girl was probably significantly more experienced in this type of situation than I was. She wasn’t waiting on line if she was able to work around it. So I tell her, “Oh sorry, you had to be there this morning. I’m not sure if they have any left, but you can ask.” She goes and asks, and she was told no. I didn’t see her again until later.

At some point, we were told to move upstairs. Then, we were told to move outside. They kept playing fucking musical chairs with where they were going to have the crowd. We stood in that heat for hours. In those days, I wasn’t expecting that. I wasn’t emotionally prepared. But there we were. I met some other people too. One girl had colorful hair. I think I can’t remember this event as well as others because the sun on my head gave me memory loss or something 💀.

After an extended period of time, we are finally brought into the building again and wait in yet another line. Once we’re at the second level, I see the blonde girl again. The security guard is standing right by the escalator, and from his expression I can see he is worn out. Who wouldn’t be, given the dismal state of the crowd control in that place? I guess I can’t blame the store for being unprepared... it’s a bookstore, not a concert venue or something. I can see her assessing the situation. She chooses what she deems the correct moment, and slides into the horde of us that are waiting to be let up to the final level— the last thing standing between us and what we came here for. He’s checking everybody’s wrist bands. She almost gets past him, but no such luck. He gets quite an attitude with her, and I get the impression that wasn’t their first interaction that day. She goes off to the side and starts texting.

My friend and I are let upstairs where we wait again. There’s a whole security thing we have to go through, and finally we are able to take our photo with Shane Dawson. He was really nice, but by this point I was less than enthused about the situation. I saw on Instagram that people who stayed upstairs or had different colored wristbands got to see a speech of some sort, and got to use fun props and pose with him and everything. I was a little annoyed. Still, the photo happened and it was nice. The girl who went before us, though, was having a total meltdown. I mean, hysterical crying. Shrieking. I didn’t understand why this girl was out here letting it all go instead of making a good impression. Sometimes I wonder what her and blonde girl are doing these days.

We took the bus home. The whole day was exhausting. I know now that meet & greets are not worth it, like at all. But I was thirteen I didn’t even know that there could ever be another option— not in regards to that specific situation, but just in general. I just wanted to meet the person who’s content I admired, and interact with them.

My point in telling this story, is that I think I always had the groupie spirit in me LOL. I’m not in the scene yet, obviously, but mostly because of circumstances making it so I haven’t been able to try. I’m a hard worker when it comes to this stuff!! But I don’t have the necessary toolkit *cough* ID *cough* to even gain entrance to the places I want to go. Let me tell you, I did HOURS of research. I asked friends. I asked my friends’ friends. Unfortunately, to no avail. As of now, I can only go where the law lets me. My main goal right now is like... trying to network I guess? When I can go to concerts, I’m trying to meet other girls who maybe know what they’re doing or have resources that I don’t. At this point I don’t really care what anyone thinks or what anyone tells me is the “right” way to be. I’m a creative person and I have a need to be around other creative people, what can I do? I love music and art and the world and I need to be around people who know what it means to truly love those things and have it as an inseparable part of yourself. I’ll keep trying!

If you all thought this story was fun I definitely have more I can tell you about. I appreciate if you give me feedback, it helps me know that people are listening and that I’m not screaming into the void. Xx