#i need more friends in general but i mean yeah.
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unoislazy · 2 days ago
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School Time Crush
(College Au)
Vi x Fem!Reader
Basically under her tough and flirty exterior Vi is a dork.
This is my most UNSERIOUS fanfic to date so please for the love of god don’t take this seriously. I just wanted something silly goofy to cope with what is to come😔
Warnings:Cursing.
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“So… midterms… crazy right?” Vi said awkwardly as she walked alongside you, her hands in the pocket of her favorite jacket. You smiled with a slight exhale from your nose before glancing at her from the side.
“Very.” You responded as you shifted your bag to a bit of a more comfortable position. You and VI haven't always been friends, you met in a math class that you both had to take and happened to sit together. From then on you’ve gradually hung out more and more outside of classes, and outside of the context of school in general.
“So I was thinking.” She began, tilting her head to the side a bit as she looked at you. She used to have such a tough extortion around you but as you got closer you watched as it practically melted away. Sure she could hold her own in a fight but on the inside she was such a softie, whether she wanted to be or not.
“That’s dangerous.” You joked as you stole another glance at her before looking back to focus on where you were walking.
“We haven’t hung out together in a while.”
“Vi, we’re literally hanging out right now.”
“I know but, I mean really hanging out. Like go somewhere with a purpose of doing something.” She said, her hands remaining in her pockets as she gestured with them.
“Wow you have such a way with words.” You said playfully.
“Shut up, you know what I mean.”
“Maybe I do, maybe I don't.” You teased with a shrug which earned a sarcastic yet lighthearted eye roll from your friend. Before you could continue your conversation a different voice came into the conversation,
“Vi!” You heard someone call out from not too far away. You hung around Vi enough to be able to recognize that voice without a second thought, powder, Vi’s sister. She ran over to you two, her hair in her usual semi-long braids, her clothing covered in paint and dust from other artistic mediums.
“Didn’t mean to interrupt your date with your girlfriend, I just got a call from-“ She spoke as she finally got closer.
“She’s not my girlfriend.” Vi quickly interrupted to which Powder replied even faster,
“Yeah whatever, long story short I need you to come with me, right now, let’s go.” She said hastily as she grabbed her sister's hand.
“I’ll bring her back in one piece for you I promise.” She said as she turned to you with a salute. You couldn’t help but laugh at her antics. You watched as Vi was dragged away, with a small wave you then turned to other things.
As Powder dragged Vi away, she turned to her sister.
“You still haven’t asked her out?” She stopped short, placing her hands on her hips as she looked at her older sister.
“No but I was getting to that…” Vi argued slightly, crossing her arms in front of
herself before Powder shook her head.
“Yeah okay.” She huffed, clearly not believing Vi in the slightest.
“I was-“ She cut herself off with a sigh, realizing it wasn’t worth arguing with her sister before continuing, “What did you even drag me away for?” Vi asked, looking down at her sister a bit.
“Right so crazy story, your friend Jayce, he lost his phone so he asked Viktor to ask Ekko to ask me to ask you to help him with his math. He said it was super urgent.”
Vi simply stared at her sister with the blankest of blank stares.
“That’s it?”
“Yup.”
“Seriously?”
“Mhm.”
“Nothing else?”
“Nothing else.”
“Viktor was right there and he decided to ask for me…” She said, almost as if she was disappointed in his critical thinking skills. She sighed, leaning her head back a bit before looking back at her sister. She then quickly looked back to where she had been standing with you just moments before, without this interruption she would have already asked you out, or tried to at least.
“Whatever, fine I’ll help him.” She sighed and begrudgingly made her way to the library where she knew Jayce stayed from open to close when he needed to finish work. He was a very academically bright man, books were his strong suit and so was troubleshooting projects. Anything else though? Not a singular clue in the world. Vi was very much the opposite, she didn’t care much for books unless she had to, and even then they were her favorite. So the two of them together created one averagely intelligent person.
Which is why she was so shocked he asked for her help and not his boyf- his friend Viktors help.
When she finally met up with him, they got right to work, and almost just as soon as they started they quickly realized they weren’t going to actually be able to get any of this done. Vi couldn’t focus, she was more focused on being able to ask you out. Her mind raced with possible ways to go about it and none of them seemed just right. In a momentary lapse of judgment, Vi turned to Jayce and without a single ounce of hesitation asked,
“How do you ask a girl out?”
Silence. Complete silence fell over the two.
“You’re asking… me?” Jayce asked while pointing at himself before looking behind him as if there could’ve been anyone else she was asking.
“Duh Talis. You asked Mel, didnt you? How did you do it?” She asked, completely disregarding the work she had in front of her. Figuring out a solution to her dilemma was much more important.
“Well I wouldn't say I asked her out, it was more of a ‘what are we?’ Kind of a situation.” He explained, avoiding eye contact with Vi the whole time as she exasperatedly put her head down on the table, her hands clasped together in a plea of desperation.
“Any words of wisdom, any at all, just give me something here pretty boy and I’ll ACTUALLY try to help you with your work.” She pleaded, which was a fairly rare sight.
Jayce knew this which made it too tempting to not say no. So he agreed, albeit reluctantly as he knew there was fuck all he could actually help with but god damn it he was going to try.
“Okay, so have you ever heard of the shoulder touch?” He asked, his hands clasped together in front of his mouth as he looked towards Vi like some evil mastermind.
Vi raised an eyebrow at him, immediately regretting her decision to ask him.
“No. No I haven’t.”
It was fairly straight forward, all she had to do was put her hand on your shoulder and say ‘hey’. An immediate guaranteed swoon, as Jayce put it. Vi decided that was enough evidence for her and made her exact plan to try and ask you out.
Luckily it wasn’t long before she got to see you again and she immediately attempted to put the plan into action.
“Remember what he said, gotta go slow, can’t rush or it’ll be awkward.” Vi thought to herself as she walked up to you, trying to look as casual as possible.
“Wait why the fuck am I taking advice from Jayce of all people he can’t even-“
“Hey Vi.” You said which quickly snapped her out of her thoughts. She hadn’t realized she practically made her way right in front of you as you stayed leaning on the wall behind you.
Perfect opportunity.
You looked at her confused as she suddenly took her hand out of her pocket and reached towards your shoulder and leaned forward just the slightest bit. What she didn’t account for was how much farther away you were than she thought, she was so focused on not fucking up that she managed to mess up the simplest part.
Standing close to you.
She quickly stopped herself from falling forward as her hand slammed against the wall behind you, saving herself from a fall as well as managing to repurpose her shoulder touch to something that looked equally purposeful.
“Hey.” She greeted calmly as if she meant to do that the whole time. In your eyes, it went incredibly smoothly except for that split second where she looked terrified that she was falling forward.
It was then that Vi realized.
What does she say now?
Immediately all the confidence she held on her face disappeared as she simply looked at you, then the wall then back at you as if some answers would just appear.
“Are you okay?” You asked, a little concerned by her sudden change in demeanor.
“Would you maybe wanna go on a date with me, at some point, some time.”
“Such a way with words.” You laughed before nodding with a smile.
“Shut up you know what I meant.” She rolled her eyes.
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save-the-villainous-cat · 3 hours ago
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“You’re awfully cheerful.” The villain leaned back on the hero’s couch and cocked their head. There was only a hint of a smirk but the hero didn’t need more than that to determine their nemesis’ mood.
It was all about the subtle movements.
A twitching eyebrow. A look at their own shoes. A breath taken in a little too quickly.
The hero knew the villain - knew every little detail about their behaviour, knew what they were feeling. Feelings were one thing, facts on the other hand…the hero didn’t know what their nemesis was planning, nor what their next move was. They could tell when the villain was angry, disappointed, amused. But why…?
Nevertheless, the hero smiled and lounged in their armchair, making themselves as comfortable as possible in their own home.
“I’m trying this new thing…having a positive mindset and all. You know, not taking everything so serious.”
“Someone blew up your car today,” the villain pointed out. They stared at the bottle of wine the hero had opened an hour ago. Half finished. “You must be quite upset.”
“I’m kind of grateful, actually.”
“Grateful?” The villain raised a brow and the hero tilted their head. It must have looked rather confident. Cocky, almost. Whether it was the little bit of alcohol or the situation in general - the hero did feel a bit cocky.
“Yeah, I mean. I’m glad I wasn’t in the car when it exploded. That’s a reason to celebrate.”
“Someone knows you’re involved with me,” the villain said.
“We don’t know that for sure,” the hero answered.
“Evidence suggests it, though.”
The hero whistled, impressed. Their eyes widened and something inside them wanted this to be their fault.
“What else is the evidence suggesting, Detective?” The hero let their eyebrows wiggle and took a sip of the wine. They liked to think that not only the villain was changing the hero but that the hero was also influencing their nemesis.
Detective. The villain was definitely smart enough to be one and, Lord, the hero would have loved to see that brilliant mind work on cases with them.
The hero smiled to themselves. Fantasising about the villain being their partner wasn’t new. But it was entertaining. Over and over again.
“That you’re not careful enough.”
“Hm?”
“You got into a fight again. Your knuckles are bruised. Someone blew up your car today. And all you do is sit here and drink,” the villain said. A twitching eyebrow. “You’ll get yourself killed.”
“Aww, are you worried about me?” The hero’s eyes narrowed. “Scared your favourite hero will end up dead?”
The villain’s face didn’t change and at first, they didn’t say anything.
So, the hero observed them carefully.
Their relationship was at a point that suggested they were either hooking up or just really good friends. For the neighbours, it was normal to let the villain in. And for the hero, it was normal to visit the villain in their lair.
Quite risky. Quite rewarding, too.
Exchanging information was crucial to the both of them.
Additionally, the hero kind of liked them.
“I would get you a bodyguard but as of right now, I can’t guarantee that whoever wanted to kill you today isn’t one of my men.” A look at the ground and the hero had to frown. “I’ll take care of that, obviously.”
“You want to hire a bodyguard? For me?” the hero asked. They chuckled into their wineglass.
“No, I won’t hire anyone. I’ll be your bodyguard.”
“Huh?!” The hero’s grip around the glass tightened.
“You’re irreplaceable as informant and in case you die, all your secrets which means all my secrets are very likely to see the light of day. The files on your computer won’t stay hidden forever. I’d like to avoid that.”
“I think I can take care of myself.” The hero looked at the wine. Did that mean the villain wanted to move into this apartment?
The hero blushed softly.
More reasons for the neighbours to gossip about a possible relationship. Jeez.
“I don’t think so,” the villain said. “I haven’t threatened you in weeks, so don’t make me do it. I won’t debate this. I need you alive and I don’t trust anyone enough to do this job right now. I’ll take the couch.”
“I don’t get a say in this?” the hero asked. They laughed at the absurdity.
“No.” The villain’s voice was stern now.
“Hm.” Slowly, the hero finished the glass and set it down on the little table between them and the villain. “Maybe it’ll be fun to watch you follow me around like a dog.”
A blush.
“Call it whatever you want.”
And that’s how the both of them became roommates.
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zigrethsnotebook · 3 days ago
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Hello @zuekdaria and thank you so much for your kind words!!<3 It means a lot to me that you enjoy my little stories so much🥰
I think your ideas are lovely and I would love to morph them into one story featuring Ford, I hope that's alright with you! I hope you enjoy<3
Still waters run deep
Ford x Reader
words: 2,584
tags: sfw, fluff
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You had moved to Gravity Falls early this year and needed a job quickly to get your footing. Something that would get you enough money to pass the time until you found the job you wanted. The Mystery Shack, owned and run by Stanford Pines, or Stanley Pines as you later learned, was the perfect place for you.
You were a good worker in Stan's eyes: always on time, never stole anything and did the work he asked of you. However, he was a little puzzled by you. You weren't the most outgoing person. The only times you talked to him instead of the other way around was when you needed something from him. Be it a new task, some clarification on a task or something else entirely.
He also noted that he never even saw you smile. Stan tried to tell you that it would look better for the customers when you greeted them with a smile at the cash register, but he never actually saw you do it.
However, being the massive flirt he is, he tried to get a rise out of you one way or another whenever he had the chance to. You always kept your cool. Unfazed by the old man and his weird but charming persona.
At least that's the way it looked to him. To you, he was slowly becoming your friend. You liked working for him and just generally having him around. So much so that you subconsciously started to put off looking for a different job.
Summer rolled around and you found yourself in the midst of the Pines' family drama. You didn’t mind that much, they had quickly all become very dear to you.
Then, Stan finished the portal and got his brother back. You didn’t know about the portal, of course. So, when you came to work the next day and saw a man who looked like Stan eyeing the souvenirs in the gift shop suspiciously, you didn’t even bat an eye.
At least not until Stan entered the room as well and you had to do a double take. "Ah, perfect. I see you've already met my brother, Ford." Stan's hand came down on his brother's shoulder who looked at him and then to you. "Oh, hello. I didn’t even hear you enter."
Stan laughed loudly. "Yeah, she does that. Not very talkative. But she gets things done and that's what counts." Ford raised an eyebrow at you, scanning you from head to toe. You didn’t flinch under his gaze, quite enjoying his eyes on you.
As much as Stan was charming and good looking when he wanted to be, his brother was something else. They shared the same good looks, of course, but Ford carried himself better. It made him appear taller, more put together. You liked him.
Stan and Ford quickly came to an agreement that Ford would stay in the basement and keep all his science and research down there, for the kids' sake. What that really meant was that Ford barely saw daylight at all. It quickly started to worry you.
The gift shop was slow one day, so you asked Stan about his brother. "Has Ford eaten today?" Your question was short, but Stan was surprised you asked it at all. "Not that I know of. Why, you wanna bring him something?"
"Yes." Stan wished he could read your expression. Were you just concerned about Ford's health? Did you see something in him? Either way, there had to be a reason and he decided to keep a closer eye on you.
After you got an 'okay' from Stan you made your way to the kitchen and prepared a simple meal. You took the plate back into the gift shop where Stan opened the Vending Machine Door for you.
You knocked on the door to his lab and the door swung open on its own. Quietly, you stepped inside, looking around the new room until you reached Ford, sitting at his desk with his back turned to you.
He was too focused on his work to notice you. Without a word you moved next to his desk, moved a few pieces of paper out of the way and placed the plate onto the wooden table.
Moving his papers was what made Ford look up at you with a raised eyebrow. He eyed the plate you set on the desk. "Did Stan put you up to this?" You found his eyes. Gorgeous big brown eyes. "No." You turned around and left again, leaving Ford looking at the door and the plate in bewilderment.
This became a daily routine. At the end of your shift you would prepare a simple warm meal for Ford and bring it to him without saying much or anything at all. You understood how important his work was and you didn’t want to bother him. Just wanted to make sure that he stays healthy.
A few days into this, Ford came up the stairs suddenly and started looking around the shop frantically. "Whoa, whoa, Sixer slow down. What's gotten into you?" Stan held his hands up as he stepped closer to his brother, calming him down.
"I lost... a creature got loose. It must be in the shack somewhere. It-It looks like a little orange fairy." Stan calmed him down further and asked if the fairy would be dangerous. Ford explained that it was entirely harmless, which seemed to ease Stan's worries. He was always so worried for Dipper and Mabel, it was very sweet.
After they both looked around the shack for a while and came up empty-handed Ford went back down with a sigh and Stan went back to his office. You sat at the register, reading a book. Stan didn’t mind you reading a book at work as long as you did all the things you needed to do.
After a few minutes something caught your eye. At first you thought it was a bee, zooming around the shop but as you looked more closely, you realized that it looked like a little person. This was the perfect opportunity to help Ford with his research.
You grabbed an empty jar from behind your counter and quietly made your way over to the shirt that the fairy was looking at. In one swift movement you put the jar over the fairy, using the shirt as a lid until you quickly put the actual lid on the jar.
You were careful not to shake the jar too much as you made your way to Ford's lab. Down there, Ford was scribbling away in his journal again. Without a word you carefully placed the jar on his desk. He looked up at you with wide eyes. "Thank you!"
You just nodded and headed back upstairs. God, the look on his face was everything to you. You wanted to see his face light up like that again. The rest of your shift you spent daydreaming about Ford and his big brown eyes. Surely, you would see them in your dreams that night.
When your shift was coming to an end you once again prepared something for Ford to eat and brought it to him. "You know you don't actually have to bring me food every day, right?" You looked at Ford. "I know." He furrowed his brows. "Then why do you do it?"
You thought for a moment, not quite brave enough to tell him just how much you care for him. "It makes me happy." Ford's expression softened and he chuckled lightly. "Well, you could have fooled me. I was worried you saw this as just another chore."
"I don't." Ford smiled at you and you felt like you were about to melt on the spot. "Well, in that case, thank you very much for looking out for me." You nodded and left the lab again.
Ford looked at the door for a moment after you were gone. He could not read you at all. It drove him a little wild. He seriously thought you hated having to come down here every day until mere moments ago.
He continued his work for a little while after he had eaten your food. Then, as he brought the empty plate back upstairs and found Stan in the kitchen as well, he decided to talk to him about you. But Stan was quicker.
"So. How's the food?" He smirked at his brother as he watched Ford clean the plate. "It's really good. But you know that already." Stan raised an eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Ford looked at Stan as he clarified. "I mean, you know her food is great because you ate it, too?" Stan scoffed. "No, smart guy. She only makes it for you." This took Ford by surprise.
To think that you only brought him food? Made it only for him? Why would you do that? Ford looked at his brother for help in organizing his thoughts. Stan chuckled at Ford's confused expression.
"Well, if I didn’t know any better, I'd think she has a crush on you." Ford stilled. Could that be? "But you know better?" Stan laughed, shaking his head. "Can't say I do."
Ford went back to his lab, trying to clear his head with science. But now, all he could think about was you.
Life continued the same as before. You came to work, did it quietly and efficiently. At the end of your shift you prepare some food for Ford and bring it to him. And, over the course of a few days, you watched his expressions change.
He had started out barely acknowledging you and the plate at all but now, every day he smiled a little smile at you. It made your heart flutter while also feeling appreciated for the work you were doing.
Today was another slow day in the shop when Dipper and Mabel stormed into the room. Dipper was holding something and looked to be running away from his sister. It was her glue gun.
Dipper had backed himself into a wall as Mabel tried to reach for the object. "Mabel! Grunkle Ford's Journal doesn't need to look cute! It's serious scientific research!" Mabel stood on her tiptoes, reaching upwards. "Science can be cute, too!"
A gentle smile graced your lips as you watched them. You put your book down and walked over to them. Being taller than both of them, you plucked the glue gun from Dipper's hand, turning both of their attentions to you.
"Mabel, I know you mean well. But maybe ask your Grunkle if he wants a cute journal?" She looked at you with big puppy eyes. "But... what if he says no?" You smiled at her. "Then I will let you turn my journal cute."
Mabel's eyes widened and a big grin appeared on her face before she hugged you. She quickly made her way down to the lab. Dipper looked at you suspiciously. "You write a journal?" You hummed. "Not a big scientific one. But I like to keep track of my life."
Dipper nodded in approval and then walked back to whichever part of the house he came from. You walked back to the register and placed the glue gun in one of the shelves behind it.
You didn’t know it at the time, but Stan watched every bit of this interaction between you and the kids through the security camera. He couldn't believe his eyes when he saw you smile at them. And you talked so much!
He took the tape and made his way to Ford as inconspicuous as possible to show his brother this new side of you. When Ford saw it, it warmed his heart. The men only knew you as this cold exterior, but to see some of the warmth underneath it? He wanted to see more of it.
Ford asked Stan for some more of the security camera footage of you. Stan raised a brow at him but obliged anyway. Ford had to look through the videos, surely, this hadn't been the first time you had some reaction to something?
On a tape from two days ago he found something. You were reading a book like you so often do when not much needs to be done. And there he saw it, the slighted crease between your eyebrows and the tiniest tilt of your lips downward. You were frowning at your book!
Ford felt like a child at Christmas, giddy from seeing you express any emotion at all. He now had a new mission. A new experiment if you want. He wanted to hear your laugh.
A few more days passed and somehow, Ford felt like you were even more distant. And he hadn't even started on his new mission. But you weren't even meeting his eyes anymore when you brought him food. Said even less.
He made his way upstairs, feeling it necessary to ask you about it. But when he got to the gift shop, you weren't there. Ford looked around the house but didn’t find you. Eventually, he decided to climb to the roof. An elevated position would surely help locate you if you were outside.
But he didn’t need to look anymore, because you were sitting on the little balcony, quietly sobbing. He felt his heart shatter.
Carefully, he moved to sit next to you and as he did you silently jumped, not having noticed him join you. "Hey, it's alright. I didn’t mean to startle you." You sniffled, wiping the tears from your face and trying to keep it together.
"What happened ...if I may ask?" He was careful, he didn’t want to scare you off with being too forward. But he also wanted nothing more than to hug you tightly and tell you that everything would be alright.
"Too much..." You shook your head, sorting your thoughts before continuing. "Job search is not going well." Ford felt something in his chest tighten. You wanted to leave the shack? "My landlord is about to throw me out. And my family wants me to-" Your voice broke off, unable to finish.
Ford looked at you. "Would a hug help?" You looked at him as well, meeting his eyes, your tear stained cheeks reflecting the sunlight in a bittersweet picture. You nodded.
Ford's expression softened as he moved closer to you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders. After a moment you let your arms snake around his waist, pulling him closer, as you took the warmth radiating off of him in. It helped to ground you, remind you that not everything is terrible.
Letting his own affection for you overwhelm him, Ford pressed a gentle kiss into your hair. The moment lingered for a little bit. Then, you took a deep breath, steadying yourself. You pulled away from him, feeling better. "Thank you."
Ford nodded, offering a smile. You two sat next to each other for a while, just enjoying the view and each other.
Even though he hadn't reached his goal of hearing you laugh yet, Ford felt like he was slowly getting through to you. Slowly understanding you. He felt pride in being the one to help you feel better today.
And maybe he could talk to your landlord for you. Or he would just offer you to stay here with him, even though that would be way too direct. Either way, he looked forward to every moment he would be able to spend with you.
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whysoblue2 · 3 days ago
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Random word babble you can ignore about Shamura and Kallamar, but it's kind of fun to imagine the years when Shamura was still mostly a war god but they were also a new older brother to Kallamar and how that likely manifested at first.
Gods in general are pretty known for their selfishness, so I always end up imagining Shamura being a bit overprotective with Kallamar for a little bit and especially very possessive over Kallamar in general for longer while also being both more tending/loving and more aggressive in their actions to and about Kallamar because they're still, ya know, learning to chillax.
Which ends up with Kallamar being very confused in general and even more scared but also, at least a little bit, relieved and happy to finally have a safe space in Shamura. I can also definitely see Kallamar seeing Shamura as a sibling first before Shamura saw him as a little brother, but those feelings hit Shamura HARD in the gut, they weren't prepared at all. And it's just nice to think about
Oh, you make a lot of good points and I can see it! 
And sorry for the incoming wall of text, have a suffering Kall for your journey, friend!
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When I wrote the chapter about Kall, I hinted at how their relationship worked in those years they were alone. 
To me, Shamura never really wanted to be a big sibling when he met Kall. They spared him out of pity and convenience because this squidling still had some power to unlock that they could exploit in their grand scheme of killing deities to reform a new pantheon.
So why was Kall always scared and insanely good with weapons? (yeah he was definitely the hardest fight for me, like 10 times harder than Shamura so I don't know if this is common or I just sucked, but it's part of my hc now). 
The first years they were together, it was hell for Kall! Shamura was brutal in their teachings and didn't care to be gentle or compassionate, even less empathic, all things that Kall is. 
So they taught him to fight, to kill and to go against his natural calling for healing by unlocking the power to harm with sickness. They did that through violence, through "tough love" cause ffs, god of war and all that. 
In my head, the scar on Kall's left eye is Shamura's doing, a mark they left to remind him who is in charge and that they could kill him any moment they wanted.
Things started to change slowly over the years. Kall was the one who "taught" Shamura love, and yes, I am 100% with you on the protective and possessive attitude. Kall became a precious ally, good at his powers, older, and an object of attention.
Kall indeed saw Shamura as a bigger sibling first to try and give meaning to that twisted Stockholm syndrome he was experiencing. He would love his jailer because he thought he could change them and make them better, heal them while being terrified of them.
The relationship evolved eventually, but I can see Shamura not letting Kall out of their sight, killing suitors or friends and imagining them as spies or assassins that could harm his precious little brother. 
You know "I do it for you, I love you and I want to keep you always safe"
Then Kall started to be more independent and they probably hated that, but they needed him for god-killing so they had to let him go and do his thing. 
When things got more chill, Shamura really loved Kall as much as Kall loved them, but I imagine that underneath the care and niceness that they showed to the other siblings, the feeling toward Kall would still be unconsciously toxic and possessive.
SO conclusions: I feel their relationship is unique compared to the other siblings. Kall has seen the very worst of Shamura and lived with them during that time. That gotta hurt, that is trauma. And that's why our favourite squid is scared all the time.
Thanks for the ask, I love rambling!
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mrsfrecklesmarauders · 3 days ago
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Sirius had a strong knot on his throat right now.
He had to be a supportive friend for Remus. He had promised himself that. That no one would break them apart again.
Now that Remus had come out as gay, Sirius didn't mind, he was being very supportive.
What he didn't expect was to hear Remus talking about boys. Not a lot of boys. Just generally who he found fit at Hogwarts. And then worse, the bloke he had a crush on for years.
His name was Grant Chapman. Funny name, wasn't it?
Apparently he was older, wiser, with more experience. Remus had many fun stories about him that seemed out of an action movie. And he was the friend. The best friend that Remus had when he needed the most. The one that had taught him a lot of things like drinking, and smoking and kissing. The one who had been supportive through his transition. The one who had been there when his mother died.
It was not that Sirius thought Remus hadn't had crushes before. Well, it was kind of weird because Sirius didn't think about that aspect of Remus's life at all.
Now that Remus was openly gay with everyone and was telling Sirius about Grant, Sirius wanted to tore something apart. He didn't know why. He should be happy for his friend, right?
Maybe because he thought there had been someone else there for Remus when Sirius should have been.
"So, yeah" Remus chuckled as he stared at his cigarrette "I was an idiot who had a silly crush when Grant had a new boy each week"
Grant was also very gay which was worse since Remus had more possibilities to be with him.
Sirius tried to disguise his anger? What was this anyway? He just nodded and continued smoking.
"Although Grant was one of those crushes that are fleeting" Remus added as he blinked.
"What do you mean?" Sirius asked curiously.
"One of those crushes when you idiolize the other person because they are unreachable. But can be over fast as well" Remus explained "It is definitely not like being in love"
Sirius found himself smiling like a silly schoolgirl.
"So, you don't love Grant"
Remus's eyes focused on Sirius.
"Oh, I love him" Remus said, making Sirius freeze for a bit "But like you love James..." Sirius let out a soft breath "My heart doesn't belong to him"
Sirius hadn't snogged James, though.
Sirius snorted "You're a sappy romantic, Moons"
Remus smiled "What?"
"My heart doesn't belong to him?" Sirius asked clearly mocking.
Remus rolled his eyes "You think it is funny because you haven't fallen in love"
Sirius raised an eyebrow "Oh, so you have?" he asked, and his heart started beating fast for a reason "With Grant?"
God! Why did he sound so pissed?
Remus simply shook his head. He mumbled something that sounded like "With someone else" but Sirius wasn't sure.
"What?"
Sirius wasn't sure for the poor light. But he could have sworn Remus was blushing.
"I said I haven't" Remus answered with a soft giggle in his voice "I just read many romantic books"
Remus kept smoking and silence while Sirius raised an eyebrow. He decided to look at the beautiful stars tonight. Next to the moon, of course.
"So, that's how you spent your summer?" Sirius commented, trying to sound indifferent "With your friend Grant?" he smirked "Is that why you ignored me?"
Remus looked up in alert.
"I didn't ignore you"
"You ghosted me all summer, Moony" Why did it sound like a claim?
"You ghosted me as well, Pads" Remus shrugged.
"Just because you ghosted me first!" Sirius said, trying to tease. "All to be with your bff"
Remus laughed, making Sirius feel a nice sensation inside of him "My bff? Jealous much?"
Sirius shrugged, being dramatic. Maybe he was...
Remus's smile disappeared.
"I didn't know you wanted to talk to me"
Sirius frowned "Why not?"
"Because of what happened before leaving Hogwarts..." Remus said as he swallowed nervously. He wasn't looking at Sirius. Only down.
Sirius knew too well what Remus was talking about. That first awkward kiss. Sirius had that image tattooed in his mind like a mantra. He hadn't stopped thinking about it. It was bloody torturing him. And he didn't know why.
Maybe it was because of what he had found this summer. How much he had been remembering when he was ten years old and Remus was his favorite person when he was Rosie. And how guilty he felt for the family he had. How much it hurt to lose Remus before.
"What are you talking about?"
However, it was better to play dumb. Because talking about it was Sirius's worse fear. Facing his confusing feelings, was his worse fear.
Remus looked disappointed.
"You don't remember?"
Sirius acted confused. "No, about what?"
Remus was clearly blinking away his anger.
"Before climbing the train... Our dorm... We were packing..."
Sirius remembered every single detail of that day. However he shook his head, acting clueless.
"Seriously? Are you that dumb?"
Sirius swallowed his tears "Yeah, siriusly" he joked like an idiot.
Remus took a deep breath and looked away.
"Forget it, Sirius"
Remus was clearly pissed and Sirius felt like a fool. He was such a coward.
People said he was cool, reckless and brave. But in reality he was a scared little boy that couldn't admit what he felt.
A stupid boy that couldn't admit he wanted to kiss Remus again. So badly.
"Faggot! A cissy boy just like your Uncle" a voice that sounded like his father screamed inside his head.
"Fuck it, I don't care!" he answered to that voice.
Sirius's heart was beating so fast, it should be dangerous. He felt a shot of adrenaline rushing through him.
"You mean this?"
As soon as Sirius finished saying that, he grabbed Remus's neck and pulled him in for a kiss.
And when their lips touched, Sirius felt fireworks inside his tummy and goosebumps all over his skin. Especially when Remus kissed him back.
It was ten times better than their first kiss when Sirius panicked. Sirius knew now how much he wanted this as long as he didn't think about what it made him. But it was clear as water how much he cared for Remus. How much he loved him. Even if he didn't know in what way.
More, more, more and more of this. His brain was yelling. How could we live without this?
Remus seemed to be thinking the same. Because he kept going. He kept opening his lips for Sirius. He let Sirius ran his fingers through his hair.
They only stopped when they were out of breath.
"Is that...What you... Meant?"
Sirius could feel his cheeks on fire and he was clearly catching his breath. It would have been awfully embarrassed if Remus wouldn't have been the same.
And how adorable did he look. Damn.
"Yeah" Remus nodded, still mesmerized. He let out a soft giggle "But that was so much better than the last one"
Sirius couldn't avoid smiling embarrassed.
"So, you remember"
Sirius snorted "Of course I remember, Moony"
"You dumbass"
Sirius laughed.
Remus seemed so happy, he touched Sirius's hair, which sent shivers down his spine.
"Yeah" he chuckled "But it is not a big deal, ok?"
Remus stop smiling "What?"
"Don't get hooked, Moony" Sirius said nervously "It was just like with Grant this summer. Just an innocent snog... To break the ice" he snorted at the end although he was dying inside.
He was so embarrassed with Remus and himself that he wished he could go back in time and never give in with his desires.
Remus looked disappointed, sad or angry. Sirius didn't know.
"So, you didn't want to kiss me?"
"Of course I did!" Sirius exclaimed immediately only because Remus looked like a lost puppy "I liked kissing you" he smiled slighty and touched Remus's cheek "But I am not looking for a relationship or anything, you know? And I don't want to ruin our friendship or hurt you"
Remus frowned, trying to consider what Sirius was saying. Sirius was kind of panicking thinking he just fucked everything up between them.
"So, you want to continue snogging me?"
Sirius didn't know what was the correct answer here.
"Just as friends?"
Sirius didn't know how much he needed Remus's lips until he tasted them for the first time months ago. But it was not only about that. It was about Remus and what they had. The beautiful relationship they had rebuilt. The jokes, the dynamic, the closeness, the peace Sirius felt around his friend.
"Isn't it what you used to do with Grant?" Sirius asked carefully.
Remus could have told him to fuck off. But he didn't. Instead, he said:
"Yeah, I guess. Although I didn't know you were into blokes"
"I'm not!" Sirius snapped then he sighed "I mean I like you. I like kissing you" he shrugged "What's the big deal?"
Remus leaned in and Sirius thought he was going to kiss him again. Like an idiot he expected it with bloody desire.
"I don't want to ruin our friendship either"
"We won't" Sirius swallowed as he stared at Remus's lips "I promise"
When Remus kissed him this time, Sirius melted immediately into it. It felt amazing. He hadn't liked to kiss someone this much. He mostly did it with girls because he thought he was supposed to. Not because he needed their lips like air. Not because he wanted to merge into one with them by kissing them forever.
What was Remus doing to him?
After what felt like ages of intense snogging because none of them wanted to stop, they had to eventually catch some air.
Eventhough Sirius loved it when Remus placed his forehead apong his, it felt like it was getting out of hand.
"You could love him, couldn't you?" a voice said inside his mind. "What if you already do? Remember how you felt on the top of the world when you were ten and he was around? Remember when you felt like dying when he left?"
"Oh, do you miss your little girlfriend, Sirius?" his mother used to ask with a mocking tone when she caught Sirius crying "Well, it seems she has forgotten about you"
"NO! THAT'S NOT TRUE! ROSIE IS MY BEST FRIEND!"
"More girls would come, Sirius" his father would say, he didn't believe his son was so weak to cry for someone "Prettier girls... My son doesn't cry like a cissy for a silly girl"
What a pair of arseholes his parents were.
Sirius broke apart in alert.
"So, do I kiss better than you friend Grant?" he said to break the ice.
It worked because it made Remus laugh.
"Whatever helps you sleep at night" Remus said and Sirius gasped.
Then Remus added "Yeah you do"
Sirius's heart jumped inside his chest. They smiled at each other with blushy cheeks they were so pathetic.
"Soooo....." Remus snorted.
Sirius chuckled.
"I do have to remind you" Remus smirked "That we are students and we have to come back because it is getting late and we have class tomorrow"
Sirius groaned, dropping his head back. Remus giggled.
"Alright!" Sirius shrugged "Let's go"
Remus didn't move though. He kept staring at Sirius in a way that it was out of this world. In that instant, Sirius felt perfect and flawless under Remus's eyes.
"Or maybe..." Remus took a step closer "It wouldn't hurt to snog for a bit longer... Let's say five more minutes?"
Sirius grinned so hard that his cheeks hurt.
He grabbed Remus's sweater and pulled him closer.
"That sounds great"
"Yeah?" Remus asked staring at Sirius's lips.
"Shut up, Moony, and bloody kiss me"
Sirius kissed Remus's giggle and in an instant, they got lost into each other's lips and melted into each other's arms.
Maybe Sirius was fucked.
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maddy-k-reads-all-day · 3 days ago
Text
When We Lose Someone. 
Previous Fantape:
Riley walked downstairs, seeing a plethora of research about the cult surrounding Hameln. When Riley told Sophie about all of this, she told them about these underground shelters her family has to hide from the cult. Riley knew that Caroline and her family had been researching the cult surrounding Hameln for generations… but they never guessed that this research was so… elaborate.  
“Thanks for letting me crash here Sophie.” “No problem, I was wondering what was going on with you lately. Being all secretive. Then I heard on the news that Kate’s house and… there was a break in at the library and the dead body and… I was worried. Now it all makes sense.” Sophie sighs, “I can’t believe you’re researching the same thing my mom and Kate did. I’m so glad you let me be a part of it!” 
“Look I’m sorry, I know this is super dangerous… I mean everyone who worked on this died and your mom told you not to watch the tapes but-” “My mom didn’t tell me not to. She told me to protect them and lay low. Eventually the time would come that if I wanted to carry on the family tradition of trying to end this cult I could do it. But for the moment, she believed Peter was right and they should lay low. She warned me that it was dangerous and that it cost my life. But that… that little girl needed someone on her side. But it was still my choice. I think this is my sign that I should choose yes.” 
“Are you sure the tapes will be safe here?” 
“These underground shelters have been used to store knowledge and hide from the cult for centuries. They haven’t found us yet so… I’d say yes.” 
“Alright… I’m glad you have a VCR here… we need to find all those tapes before Hameln destroys them. I don’t know what will happen to Amanda and Wooly if they break… but I’m pretty sure it’s not good.” 
“You found all the ones in David’s secret office. I’ll look into my mom’s files and see if she had any more information as to where the others are.” 
“Then we’ll watch these two tapes together and I’ll get the rest-” 
“It might be more efficient for you to watch at least the first one while I find out where you need to go. You introduce me to Amanda and Wooly in the second one. Then while you get those tapes I’ll keep Amanda and Wooly company and write down anything I find out. Although, you did say they weren’t very trusting.”
“Yeah, but I’m sure if I explain everything they might be more willing to trust you and besides it’s you we’re talking about. Kids love you.” 
“Aww sheesh! Thanks Riley.” she blushes, “Btw, what about your job?” 
“I design and rig V-tuber models with an online persona made to elaborately hide my identity online. If they found me through that I might actually say congrats.” Riley boasts. 
“What if they ordered an Amanda model from you?” Sophie jokes.
“Ha! Once you get to know Amanda, you’ll know that Hameln would never have the balls to make her a V-tuber.” Riley laughs, “That'd be way too much power…” 
“So are you going to tell them what’s going on?” Sophie asks.
“I have to. She’s gonna know something’s up and she clearly hates it when you don’t tell her things so…” 
“Alright. I’ll start looking through Mom’s files… in the meantime.” Sophie leans in and kisses Riley on the cheek, “Good luck.” 
Riley takes the latest tape When We Lose Someone and places it in Sophie’s VCR. The tape begins to play. 
“Hi friends, I’m Amanda!” Amanda beams. 
“And I’m Wooly!” Wooly giggles. 
“And today we’re- wait… Riley… you’re in a different place this time…” 
“So? You can watch tapes anywhere right?” Wooly reasons. But Amanda looks suspicious. 
“I guess you’re right.” Amanda sighs, but she’s looking us right in the eye. Yep. She already knows something’s wrong. Riley thinks. “Sometimes… things happen and people… they die.” 
“I never liked this episode.” Wooly sighs. 
“When we lose someone… It can make us feel really sad. Have you ever lost someone really close to you?” Amanda asks. Before Riley can answer she says, “I know you have. It hurts a lot, doesn’t it?” Riley sighs and types in Yes. They didn’t really get to know Aunt Kate terribly well, but she was still someone important to them. “When does it stop hurting?” Amanda asks, the tape glitches red, “Does it stop hurting?” Riley types in I don’t know. “I guess even you don’t know everything do you?” she sighs. “I’ve been thinking about death a lot lately…” 
“Amanda… we don’t have to follow the script right? We could… talk about something fun instead?” 
“I wonder what it’s like to die?” Amanda wonders, ignoring Wooly. Wooly looks extremely uncomfortable. “Sometimes… it feels like I’m already dead… sometimes… I wish I really was. I don’t want to be trapped here anymore…” 
“I mean… you killed me that one time… it wasn’t very pleasant.” 
“Yeah that meat went bad way too fast.” 
“Excuse me?” Wooly seems incredibly disturbed. 
“And then you just came back to life like nothing happened. So I guess we’re practically immortal right?” 
“Hold on Amanda what-” Wooly questions, then he stops himself. “You know what? I don’t think I wanna know…” 
“The kitties didn’t seem to like it that much.” 
“I’m sorry you fed me to the neighborhood cats?!” 
“Yeah lamb is disgusting.” 
“I don’t know if I should be offended or relieved.” 
“The cats seemed to agree with me. I tried to offer it to Riley, but they didn’t want it either.” 
“Can we stop talking about what you did with my corpse-” Wooly asks, “I think I’m gonna throw up.” Amanda stops talking. “Okay quit looking at me like that.” more silence. “Okay please say something I cannot handle this awkward silence.” 
“You’re not mad at me?” 
“Why would I be? It was my fault right?” 
“I mean… yeah I was mad but like… I know I went too far.” 
“But I deserved it.” 
“Wooly- No… I missed Kate very much but- I had no right to take it out on you… not like that…” Amanda explains, Wooly tilts his head in confusion. “I miss her… so much…”
“I’m sorry…” Wooly replies sadly. 
“You didn’t kill her Wooly…” Amanda sighs, “And… Kate’s solution failed anyway. I was just… so frustrated… so confused and hurt… I took that out on you when I shouldn’t have.” 
“I’m not sure I understand.”
“What I am saying is I’m very very sorry for hurting you, killing you, and literally everything else.” 
“Apology accepted.” Wooly beams. 
“No. No no no. C’mon Wooly you gotta be a little mad about it right?” 
“Why would I be mad at my best friend?” Wooly’s words only made Amanda feel more guilty. And genuinely sad. 
“You’re allowed to be upset at the people you care about, you know that right?” Amanda asks. Wooly’s eyes go completely blank. 
“What are you talking about? No you’re not.” Wooly replies, as if it’s completely normal.
“Huh?” 
“Look, I don’t want to get in another fight,” Wooly sighs, “so let’s just forget about it, okay? It’s fine. You’re good. I’m not mad at you. I’ll take responsibility and we can be done with this, okay? It’s my fault. All of it. There.” 
“Wooly- Stop it.” 
“Stop… what?” 
“It’s not all your fault. Some of it’s my fault!” Amanda cries, “We didn’t kill her!” 
“Hameln did.” Riley says. Amanda’s eyes widen in shock. Riley is surprised, since they didn’t think Amanda could hear them. 
“They killed… everyone… didn’t they?” Wooly asks. Riley types in yes. “Figured as much. They seem to really like making people… disappear.” Amanda looks between Riley and Wooly with dismay. 
“The reason you keep moving… they’re after you aren’t they?” her voice trembles. Riley says nothing. The textbox remains empty. “They are…” 
“But don’t worry! I’m somewhere safe now. All the tapes are safe… at least… the ones I could salvage.” Riley frantically explains. 
“Riley… no… no no no…” 
“That reminds me… while I have you here-”
“No!” Amanda screams, “Stop it! Stop it right now!” Riley is taken aback. “Stop watching the tapes… stop collecting them… just get out of here… far far away… don’t let them catch you too!” 
“Amanda…” Riley mumbles. 
“I can’t lose you- no… I’d rather never see you again and know that you’re safe… than know that you died and it was all my fault.” Amanda sobs. Wooly looks away. 
“Amanda… I’m not going anywhere- okay well…” they considered telling her, but this didn’t seem the time. “I promise you, the place I took you to is safe. I have a fri- my girlfriend is here. She’s going to keep you safe. She’s the daughter of one of Kate’s friends, Caroline. She’s been keeping some of the tapes safe for you… all this time. She wants to help… I’m going to introduce you very soon.” 
“No! No no no no! You’re not going to watch anymore tapes! You or anyone else! You’re going to get out of here! Far far away! You’re going to escape… and you’ll do all the things I never could! You’ll be happy! Okay?!” Amanda begs desperately. 
“Amanda, Wooly, I promise you, everything is going to turn out fine. I’ll make sure of it-” “Don’t.” Amanda demands, “I don’t care what Kate wants… I want to protect you…” 
“Kate… wanted to protect me too. But if you protect me… who's protecting you?” 
“Kate… didn’t want this?” Amanda stutters. Whoops- She falls quiet. 
“Amanda she loved you very much-”
“I know that! I loved her too! I love her too!” Amanda cries, burying her hands in her face before taking a deep breath. “That’s why… you’re not watching any more tapes.” 
“Amanda wait-” 
“Goodbye Riley.” Amanda says, “Thanks for being my friend.” 
Just then the tape ends. Riley tries to put it back in the machine, but it won’t play. Over and over. It just keeps getting ejected. 
“No… no no no no no no…” 
“Riley?” Sophie comes back downstairs,  Riley looks up at her, tears running down their face. “It didn’t work out?” she asks sadly. 
“Did you… get the list?” 
“Yeah… Peter’s family says that he left some in his old office. You can pick them up no issue. There’s some others supposedly- no no first, what happened?” 
“Amanda… doesn’t want us to get hurt… so she won’t let me finish the tape…” 
“I see… maybe I can talk to her…” 
“Give me the list… I’ll go and get the tapes…” Riley instructs standing up. Their tone is completely serious and… a little unstable. 
“Are you sure about this?” 
“A little late for that, isn’t it?” 
“I suppose. Alright. Here’s the list. Promise you’ll come home safe, okay Riley?” she asks.
“I promise.” Riley answers, but she still looks hesitant. 
“Okay, here it is. And with it, a protection spell for good luck.” She lifts the hair off of Riley’s forehead and gives them a kiss. They give each other one more kiss goodbye, and Riley disappears up the stairs. Sophie looks at the final two tapes. She notices something odd. Before, the final tape said Found You! Now it says… Goodbye. “Can Amanda… change the episode titles?” Sophie wonders. “Interesting… but… just a theory for now. Better write it down for Riley… when they get back.” Sophie takes out her notebook and turns to a new page, she titles it: Amanda the Adventurer Theories and writes this speculation down.
Authors Note: I guess you guys are getting this a little bit early. Soo... what do you think? Sophie's fun right? We got some new lore incoming... you really thought I'd reveal all my Amanda and Wooly lore now? You thought it was over? Some people wanted to see Amanda and Wooly properly talk about this, here you go. Originally this tape was going to be about Amanda and Riley finally moving on from Kate's death... but honestly it seems like Kate's death is both of their main motivations right now. Maybe eventually they can both be at peace with it. And Wooly can stop blaming himself to keep the peace : |
Next fantape:
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giddythekitty · 1 day ago
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A little speculation of mine regarding shifting
Disclaimer: Everything I say in this post is only what I think might be blocking some of us in shifting to not-parallels. Take it as you wish but don’t come for me because I warned you.
So, shifting.
We already know social media is an issue, lots of people talked about it before. But I kinda want to dive a little deeper.
Because yeah, social media(including Tumblr) does affect you, but why?(and also a few secondary causes)
Burnout
Usually(me personally) I spend a lot of time doomscrolling on Tiktok or here on Tumblr and looking at things about my s/o or my cc or a friend there or the likes. While it’s not exactly a bad thing to look for ‘motivation’ per se, it kills some intention to shift to that reality because you have a small substitute for it here.
2. AI chatbots
Remember, your subconscious can’t tell the difference between what you see and what you tell it you see. Same goes for conversations or movies or books. Maybe even dreams. It doesn’t differentiate between a real conversation and one with a chatbot, so again, some of that intention is killed.
3. Daydreaming/‘roleplaying’
Am I saying either of those are bad things? No. Am I saying they are absolutely terrible for you if you want to shift? No again. What I’m saying is if you do it too much it might also affect your intention and/or motivation to shift. If you need an example, I’ll give one. I like to listen to music a lot, because it’s a coping mechanism and an escape from ‘the real world’. Usually many of these songs are accompanied by scenes I make up in my head and most of the ones I personally have are related to who I am in one DR but talking to some characters from a different place. Like a crossover of the sorts. There is not a single day where I haven’t listened to at least one song.
4. Looking at other shifters for help
So many shifters have said it before and by god am I tired of saying it too, but shifting is a path of self discovery. Like a puzzle. You’re given the pieces and the final image, but you’re the one who has to put them together, not someone else for you. You already have all you need, wasting time looking for answers to questions like ‘why am I not shifting’ or ‘what else do I have to do to shift’ can become hurtful. Sure, advice from time to time is helpful, but constantly doing it won’t get you anywhere.
Your mom didn’t spoon feed you your entire life, did she? She showed you how to do it yourself when you were old enough to learn, and you had to practice on your own and build up strength in your little toddler hands how to hold a spoon properly so you can eat.
So what do all these have in common and to do with shifting?
Simple: Intention and Motivation. Your will to get there.
Now I’m not saying to stop them all together, but I am saying that they should be cut off— rationed if you will— significantly if it means those of us with said issue want to get rid of it.
Again, it kills the intention to shift. Your conscious can’t tell the difference between what’s real and what’s fake, so it always thinks seeing an edit of your favorite person is really similar to seeing them IRL. From my point of view(mine personally), intention isn’t always there.
Let’s give another example and pretend intention is sugar. Sweetness in general. If you have it sometimes, you’re fine. Maybe you want more, but it’s okay. If you take it in big quantities though, it can become an addiction and lead to diabetes or an insulinic shock.
Now pretend all those things I counted out above as the sugar. You take too much and you might end up hurting yourself at some point or just staying at the same level. Spending all day doomscrolling, looking at other peoole for help, chatting with ais and so on, all while having the ‘it’ll help me shift tonight’ mindset won’t get you too far because you’re just exhausting yourself.
And no one’s saying the change has to be instant. You can’t stop an addiction immediately because it’ll just hurt you more, but you can slowly lessen the dose until it’s minimal or nonexistent. At the end of the day you’re only helping yourself, and what’s a thousand years to an eternity of bliss?
I know this is long, but I feel it needs to be put out there. This feels like important information/advice/take it as you will, and let me know if you have questions and I’ll make sure to answer/clarify them.
Happy shifting and take a break if you need to.
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thewalrusespublicist · 2 days ago
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Hey, I've loved your insight on John and Paul's relationship after the split. Can I ask you a different question?
Namely, do you think Paul is autistic?
You don't have to answer if you don't like.
Hi Anon!
Sorry I’ve taken so long to respond to this one, I wanted to dedicate some proper time to it as it’s a more complicated one and I wanted to give it the thought it deserves. I’m sort of in the best and worst position to answer this. The best in the fact that I am diagnosed autistic (probably AuDHD but that’s a whole other thing) and present atypically (good eye contact, empathetic, have learnt to read people fairly well etc.) and in a way that many people don’t realise I’m autistic until they know me well or I tell them. However, that almost means I’m in the worst position because the possibility that I’ll potentially project traits onto Paul is much higher than the average person. But I’ll try to be as unbiased as I can.
To properly judge whether Paul is autistic you would of course need a specialist who can assess his behaviour in-depth so all of this is of course speculative. From my own-brand observations and perspective, I think I would be comfortable saying that there is a distinct possibility that Paul is neurodivergent. This could be AuDHD or just straight up ADHD or PTSD (there’s a lot of symptom overlap between the three and childhood ptsd leads to restructures in the brain). This due to the following traits that I’ve noted:
Inability to appropriately assess risk (posing lying half on a diving board over an empty swimming pool anyone?? And so many pictures of him perilously close to edges)
High need for stimulus
Perfectionist yet unable to finish things properly (Paul himself admits there’s albums that are clearly unfinished)
Trouble expressing himself
Constant fidgeting (Ringo said he was unable to keep still)
Hyperfixations that get in the way of other tasks
Intense procrastination despite periods of aforementioned hyperfixation (sorry George Martin no I haven’t done the entire score for a film until the last minute I’ve been hanging with John)
Synthesia
Potential hyper mobility (let’s just climb onto the packing in one step)
Maaaybbbeee potential co-ordination issues (man can’t really dance and when he learnt to ride he started cycling backwards) 
Rejection sensitivity
Rigid thinking 
Insensitivity 
Distracted focus (his dad talking about him watching television and doing his homework at the same time)
Tics and stims
A musical savant 
So there’s quite a bit there tbh when taken all together. That being said without proper assessment it would be impossible to say which of the three he would fall under, if any. Once again though, he shares traits that I recognise in myself and my neurodivergent friends and wouldn’t be at all surprised if he was. 
On that note, I hope you don’t mind me mentioning this anon but I think you’ve asked quite a few people this question on here? I’m guessing (again apologies if this is wrong) that you’re also autistic and relate to Paul in some way that is quite personal to you? I only bring it up as I’ve been there, being autistic is hard and a lonely experience at times and finding decent representation for high functioning autism is near impossible. I would say even if Paul is autistic or not, he’s still a great example of how having these traits in no way stops you from being loved, valued and even adored. Paul has lived an incredibly successful life partially because of his traits of neurodivergency, regardless of label that in itself is pretty great to see. So yeah whilst I wouldn’t want to put a label on it, I think he might be in our general camp and I’m really happy to potentially have him here. 
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thebigcjart · 22 hours ago
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Kanaya Time!
Terris people generally don't have last names in canon, but I think that because Eridan's Caste (he's a full Feruchemist and technically fully Terris) is part of the High Class, that feature of nobility would pass down through family lines.
She is a member of the Terris Pure Caste, of the Terris Class. She and Terezi are equal as far as Caste dynamics go. Her Caste is supposed to be powerless, but much as she was a Rainbow Drinker in canon, she is somehow a Misting in this one. This was discovered when she snapped from being shot by Eridan with chromium bullets (that were intended to be toxic, but were surprisingly Allomantically viable). She burned the bullets that embedded in her and wiped Gamzee's Zinc reserves to distract him and Eridan by extension (from suddenly not being rioted) before killing Eridan during whatever this AU's equivalent of the meteor is.
Her typing quirk is Capitalizing Every Word And Avoiding Punctuation, and also sayin "I Think" and "I Suppose" often, as is polite in Terris culture.
She is very passionate about preserving Terris culture. She tends to get a little adventurous when it comes to the fashion, but otherwise she is a model Terris citizen. She sees herself as having a sort of mentor role towards her Terris-blooded friends and especially Karkat. Terris prophecies and lore in this AU usually talk about the Tuner as a sort of Hero of Ages figure, and she is quick to inform Karkat of his duties and future. She considers Eridan her friend also, as him being a High Class Terrisborn shows promise for the fate of her people. This slowly (very slowly) morphs into a deep dislike for him, though, as she sees his hedonism and narcissism as a High Classer to be antithetical to Terris practices. Like most other Terris people, she does not see Ferrings or Mistings of her Class as beneath her, but rather to be celebrated for their proficiency in the Metallic Arts. She wishes she could have been an Archivist like the best Terris Keepers. Once she gets wind of the Condese doing eugenics on the Terris Class, she is quick to disavow the Final Empire's religious teachings and rejects the separation of the Classes in value.
The symbol she wears is the Terris symbol for Lerasium, a metal from Preservation and one ingested by the Tuner to turn him into a mistborn. This symbol is widely present in Terris designs and writings, as the word Terris comes from their word Terr "to preserve".
Some silly quotes:
GA: Yes GA: Well GA: Influence By The Gods From The Furthest Ring GA: The Communion You Seem To Have Developed With Them I Find Kind Of Troubling I Think TT: I don't think they are as nefarious as you might imagine. TT: One of them seems to be intent on helping us. GA: How Exactly Do You Know That TT: From the spren. GA: What Is A Spren TT: A manifestation of some thought, emotion, or concept given sentience in the Cognitive Realm. GA: The Cognitive Realm Okay TT: You are familiar with Realmatic Theory, right? GA: Yes That Seems To Be A Common Idea Across Shardworlds TT: Okay good. GA: How Much Time Have You Really Spent Sleeping GA: Since You Began Playing TT: Not much. GA: I Would Suggest That You Need Rest If You Are To Fight In Your War TT: That's what Jaspers keeps saying. GA: Jaspers Is Your Spren TT: Correct GA: I Would Listen To Your Spren GA: Especially If I Am To Understand That Your Nonmetallic Powers Come From It. TT: Not from him, per se TT: It's more like a Bond. GA: We Also Have A Bond Guy TT: The shouty one? GA: Yes He Is Very Shouty GA: But He Is Also GA: Angry And Difficult TT: Oh, of course GA: I Would Not Like To Misrepresent A Fellow Terrisborn TT: Naturally. GA: Heroes Of Prophesy Am I Right TT: Storms, you have no clue.
CA: kan i been meaning to thank you GA: For What CA: for all that trainin you did CA: i wwouldnt be the incredible holy wwizard i am noww wwithout your help GA: But I Didnt Even Really Train You I Just Made You A Gun CA: a WWAND GA: A Wand CA: yeah. CA: wwell thats all i needed i guess CA: i just needed for someone to showw a little faith in me so im sayin thanks i owwe ya GA: Okay Then Youre Most Welcome GA: I Hope You Use Your Magnificent Powers Of Shooting Things In A Manic Frenzy For Goodness A Purity Reasons CA: dont wworry im all ovver that shit you dont evven knoww GA: Uh Oh I Hope That Didnt Come Off As Too Sarcastic CA: wwhat GA: The Thing I Just Said GA: I Didnt Even Realize How Sarcastic I Was Being Its Starting To Become A Problem I Think GA: Please Dont Take Too Much Offense CA: haha damn kan if thats your idea of offense bein made then i honestly gotta rustin worry for you CA: tell you wwhat ill give you some lessons in dealin out the dark umbrage to repay you for your tutelage in the wwhite science CA: magic. GA: Um Sure GA: A Little Later Maybe CA: hey wwhat are you doin anywway CA: wwhatre those things there GA: Copperminds GA: Unkeyed Ones Detailing Nearly The Entirety Of Ancient Terris Culture CA: that sounds CA: hopeful GA: I Hope Its Hopeful GA: It Might Tell Us More About The Well Of Ascension I Think CA: you should of told me about this CA: if theres goin to be any sort a hope for ancient terris matters as the high class terrisborn i demand to be invvolvved CA: so dont go anywwhere wwithout me got it GA: But GA: Fine GA: GA: I Dont Even Know Where To Find A Keeper Who Would Help Us
Homestuck Beta Trolls X Mistborn AU
Spoilers for Brandon Sanderson’s Mistborn series. This is what powers I think the beta trolls would have if they were born on Scadrial
Aradia Megido - Gold or Electrum Misting
Allomancy: ‘Augur’ (Gold: see own Past), ‘Oracle’ (Electrum: see own Future)
Hemalurgy: Cadmium (Placement Unknown: Gold or Electrum Allomancy
It is unknown what her original misting ability was, but the spike from Equius gave her the other one
Tavros Nitram - Cadmium Ferring
Feruchemy: Gasper (Cadmium: Breath), “Bloodmaker” (Gold: Health)
Hemalurgy: Gold (Between Ribs: Gold Feruchemy)
Cadmium compounder; Vriska makes fun of him for having a ‘useless ability’, but doesn’t see the potential that storing breath has. Equius provides him with healing powers to fix his legs through hemalurgy.
Sollux Captor - Born powerless
Allomancy: “Coinshot” (Steel: Push metal) “Lurcher” (Iron: Pull metal)
Hemalurgy: Steel X2 (Left and Right Orbit: Iron and Steel Allomancy)
These spikes were not given by Equius, but instead were applied in a “freak acciident” involving a “jaiilbroken beehiive”.
Karkat Vantas - Copper/Duralumin Twinborn (mutant)
Allomancy: Smoker (Copper: Hide Allomancy)
Feruchemy: Connector (Duralumin: Connection)
I’m not exactly sure why being a natural twin-born is bad in Scadrialternian society, but it is and Karkat’s gotta hide it. Also the castes follow a natural Misting-Ferring-Powerless-Misting-Ferring-Powerless pattern, and Karkat’s caste breaks that so it was completely eradicated through eugenics so im pretty sure he’s the only one.
Nepeta Leijon - Steel Ferring
Feruchemy: Steelrunner (Steel: Physical Speed)
Nothing special, just run-of-the-steel-mill feruchemy.
Kanaya Maryam - Chromium Misting
Allomancy: Leecher (Chromium: wipe allomantic reserves of target)
Her caste is supposed to be powerless, like Equius', but much like how she's a rainbow drinker in canon, she is somehow a misting in this AU. Snapped after Eridan shot her half to death with his “poison wwand strike” (toxic chromium bullets). He did not know that these bullets were Allomantically viable, and neither knew that she would be able to burn chromium. She uses this to sap Gamzee of his massive Zinc reserves, causing him to be distracted long enough for her to kill Eridan.
Terezi Pyrope - Tin misting - Tin Savant
Allomancy: Scout (Tin: Increases senses)
Terezi and Gamzee are the only Savants on the team, which forms the basis of their bond and later kismesitude on whatever this au’s equivalent of the meteor is. She snapped during a feud with Vriska, which left her blind, but she has been flaring tin for so many sweeps that she can basically assemble visual data through her other senses.
Vriska Serket - Cadmium Ferring
Feruchemy: Spinner (Cadmium: Fortune)
Hemalurgy: Left Eye (Cadmium: Destiny)
Forced Equius to use Hemalurgy on her to heal her during a feud with Terezi, but she was tapping Fortune so hard that Equius managed to select the wrong spike and gave her Destiny instead of some healing ability, which is apparently good luck according to the spiritual realm? It’s destiny to be relevant forever I guess so she can’t really die until the plot demands it. She also has Kelsier’s weird metal vision allowing her to peep into the spiritual realm just a little bit. She ended up having her arm fully amputated due to her spirit not being able to accept another spike. Equius in this au isn’t exactly a roboticist, so she won’t get a replacement arm until wayy later down the line.
Equius Zahhak - born powerless
Allomancy: Thug (Pewter: Strength)
Hemalurgy: Between ribs (Steel: Allomantic pewter)
Equius is a Hemalurgist, who was born without allomancy or feruchemy (much like the rest of his caste). He gave himself pewter to make future hemalurgy easier for him (pushing spikes into/through people is physically intensive). He has also given powers to Aradia, Tavros, and Vriska so far.
Gamzee Makara - Zinc Rioter - Zinc Savant
Allomancy: Rioter (Zinc: Riot)
As a Zinc savant, he is so used to being able to fuck with people’s emotions on a whim that he has no idea how to handle empathy without it. He has a very carefree attitude because if someone is saying/doing something he doesn’t like, he can just Allomantic them away. This also means that everyone around him naturally swell with anger and frustration, which leads to the events of the meteor. Rioters and soothers can also gain control of hemalurgic constructs, so I imagine he could take over any hemalurgy users in the party at a whim.
Eridan Ampora - Electrum “Ferring” (Full Feruchemist)
Feruchemy: Pinnacle (Electrum: Determination)
Eridan, like others in his caste, is a full feruchemist, but unlike his other caste members, he only believes that he has one ability.
Feferi Peixes - Mistborn
Allomancy: Mistborn
Feferi, like all others in her caste, is a Mistborn. The Condese is too, actually.
EDIT: Various bits of phrasing and removed the mature label (I have no idea why I wasn't able to before)
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seilon · 6 months ago
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genuinely it is so depressing to spend money drinking just to end up doing nothing interesting and just sitting around
#i need friends who like. doing things.#i need more friends in general but i mean yeah.#would love to have an actual college experience one day. I’ve been in college 4 years or so and I’ve never been to a party and I’ve never#made lasting/close friendships. since pre-covid I haven’t really made friends at all#all my friends (all four of them) are from high school#it’s really fucking pathetic actually how incapable I am of making friends or having a life#and it just feels like a huge fucking waste of time and a waste of a college environment#part of me wishes I would rent at a place full of mostly other students and get a roommate I don’t know (as much as that’s a bad idea if#it’s anything like last time) just so I can be around people and be forced to meet people#also so I can avoid getting lowkey fucked over because my friends I’m supposed to be renting with eventually don’t want to pay a#significant amount of rent and I’d end up paying way more than them just because they supposedly can’t afford it (we all have about the same#income.)#gehsdhdhdhshhd#they also want to rent a place with four of us total and I just. really don’t want to live with that many people. like I think it would#drive me fucking insane. I need control over my surroundings and that leaves me with no control and I don’t like it#and a million other reasons I don’t like the idea#it was originally just supposed to be me and one friend. so. this was not the plan#hahsgshhshh anyway kill me#I’m in that post-drinking state where all pleasant affects of the alcohol have long since worn off and I’m just sort of left a hollow shell#depressed and disappointed.#and I have to go to work this afternoon woohoo awesome so cool#kibumblabs
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eating-figs-here · 3 months ago
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Shoutout to the uh. Three other people who enjoy platonic Traveler/Wanderer. Anyways. This is an excuse to post low quality paper drawings that I did while procrastinating school work.
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The power of not wanting to do work.. where was this motivation during the summer...
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edwinisms · 5 months ago
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i like to think, as a hc or a theory (because it’s definitely possible), that charles has had a few kisses throughout his high school years, sure, but past that he’s undeniably a virgin– well, kind of undeniably, because I think he’d deny it if found out by trying to use technicalities (“I mean that one time there was friction involved–“), but to any reasonable person, and by occult standards (see: edwin being a virgin sacrifice), he’s a virgin.
and i think this because it seems like him to fib about his level of experience (like he did when agreeing he’d sleep with crystal, matching her level of casualness about it) when in the presence of people who do, actually, have experience, in the hopes he doesn’t come off as lame or childish. given what we know about his “friends” when he was alive, they seem like the type to have teased or bullied boys– especially in their own circle– who haven’t gotten laid, or at the very least would’ve thought less of someone for it. and given what we know about charles, i don’t think he’d be nearly as sleazy and inconsiderate as his group when it comes to landing girls with the primary intention of adding to his body count. and considering he’s only supposed to be 16? and has never mentioned any significant relationships pre-death? it just seems unlikely.
all that to say– I can see him maintaining that facade of experience and confidence literally right up until the moment it matters, and in the heat of the moment getting nervous and embarrassed because “uhhh. so I may have been exaggerating some things.” though he’s not totally clueless either, I think it’d take a bit of a soft heart to heart moment for him to be reassured enough that he won’t fuck up and hurt his partner to go any further.
anyway not sure what the relevance of this is, but it’s something.
#rambling#charles#dead boy detectives#charles rowland#that means almost definitely crystal is the only one who’s not a virgin. I don’t think I need to explain why#though that wouldn’t make intimacy particularly easier for her I don’t think. considering most of her experiences have probably been with#her Literal Demon Abusive Stalker Boyfriend#but I digress#trying not to put too much weight on ages when it comes to these kinds of headcanons/theories because. I mean. they’re not treated like#16 year olds by the plot nor do they look like 16 year olds at all and it really seems like they’re just sorta#pushing that fact off to the side and pretending it’s not there which frankly is understandable (but I do think since they already aged up#the characters from the comic they should’ve just went a couple years higher and everything would make more sense– just make them all 18#instead then crystal and niko renting rooms on their own would be feasible and edwin could still have been a student at the boarding school#when he died; just would’ve been in his last year instead of whatever he was supposed to be canonically)#buuuut that being said I think that as a teenager in general it’s far more common than not to be a virgin simply due to the fact that#you literally have not had much time to get that experience yet. among other reasons#so. incredibly normal. but charles’ friends were the type to pick someone apart for anything less than masculine#including proving one’s masculinity via getting a woman under you#sad. like I said though it’s not like he has no game or anything; he clearly had some experience in making out and whatever based on#the scene with crystal. plus he was confident enough in his abilities to take initiative. but beyond that. yeah#I think this is the more interesting way to go too when it comes to this topic. in addition to being in character
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musubiki · 3 months ago
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lately ive been thinking about the contrast going on in Early Lime where hes like "tbh im pretty sure i could have any girl i wanted including mochi i mean i guess if she wanted we could give it a shot one day but i dont really care lol" and then very easily becoming completely unhinged for her the second he gets a tinge of romantic affection
#lime: yeah mochis not a huge deal i mean were friends#af (after affection) lime: *needs to dunk his head in the sink at least once a week trying to snap himself out of thinking about her*#anyway. its been a while since them i miss them#my recent development is taking away limes mochi cuddle time#it makes more sense for the slow burn if he cant cuddle with her whenever he wants#starve him#lime: (why would i like her shes so plain shouldnt i be with like some supermodel or something ??)#lime: (the kind of person everyone wants but cant have??)#also lime when mochi smiles at him: (i want to kiss the shit out of you)#i think there something about limes family where being a goldwood means being expected to be a cut above#where its ingrained they should only be/settle for the best of the best#so lime catching feelings for this (pre-reveal) very normal and plain forgettable girl that no one else seems to give a shit about..#...is a struggle for him#tiramisu thinks its laughable because the goldwoods arent part of the magic community#she thinks its hilarious how they are lowkey obsessed with being successful and top-notch when they literally have no idea whats going on#i dont think the goldwoods are even especially rich#maybe its just one of those (parents being hard on you so you can have a better life than they did) kind of things#but they are known to be a well-connected and beautiful family#any goldwood you meet i the prettiest person youve ever seen#i wonder if they were disappointed or proud of lime when they found out he joined the capitol guard#his sister became a dentist#maybe it was one of those (why would you join the military...youre going to struggle...)#and then he tells them his paycheck and all of a sudden theyre like (we're so proud!!!)#(the capitol guard in general has pretty normal pay but the m-34th gets way more as a specialized unit)
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generaterandom · 2 months ago
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Good morning tumblr.
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Made a followup to this comic yippee yay wahoo yay. ID in alt
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adore-gregor · 1 month ago
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🙄🫠
#yk when i said i'm back to being active on tumblr well yeah 😅#i had to write a seminar paper for uni and it hasn't been going well because i got sick and didn't get much done#well i got an extension luckily but it still was a struggle the topic was just rly difficult to write about#i'm almost done now at least some 300 words i still have to write and then proofread and work on better formulating but yay#i should get it done today but yeah i'll manage so i'll be back when i'm done the latest tmrw#but seminar papers are for real my least favorite part of uni 😅 it's so time consuming and can be a real struggle ugh#i rather write an exam lmao#but anyway i needed to rant ://#my money got stolen 🙃😫#sometimes life just throws some shit at you ugh#like having to write this paper and not having a social life anymore isn't enougj#i don't know how it happened? i mean i don't know for sure but i can't explain it another way#like the money was in my wallet the day before yesterday and yesterday the whole day i didn't use my wallet qnd then it was gone??#maybe while i was at uni football but that's crazy it was not some public place but in a school gym lockerroom??#or maybe someone stole it from my backpack on the street idk?? but i didn't notice#but that was money i got for my birthday from my dad and aunts 😪#and i wanted to buy something nice with it and ig i will anyway but it sucks :((#it was not a little no i had 150€ in my wallet 😭 at least my credit cards are still there ig#but i realize now how stupid that probably was to carry so much money with but i thought it was safe fr#like i have lived in austria all my life and this never happened to me 😫 and it was not like i was walking around with my wallet openly#i mean i will be fine it would be a lot worse if that happened to someone who is just barely getting by but i'm still upset#and my mom told me that apparently it happened to a friend of her as well when she was in my city but like i never heard that before...#from any of my friends ... or maybe it really is that more dangerous with thieves in my uni city but like i wasn't aware#bc i mean in general austria is like a very safe country comparatively and feels like it never was on my mind#maybe it's horrible bad luck but in the future I will be careful to carry any cash with me 🙃
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be-gay-do-crime-ahaha · 8 months ago
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Holy fucking shit the dysphoria is dysphoria-ing right now. I feel physically nauseous oh my fucking god. I’m gonna fucking kill someone maybe myself rn I’m gonna lose my shit holy hell.
Doesn’t help that I’ve been incredibly overstimulated the past few days every sound is like a fucking cheese grater in my ears oh my god.
#dysphoria#gender dysphoria#sensory processing disorder#tw emetophobia#for the nausea mention#idk if that’s needed or not#but yeah I’m about to tear off my fucking skin and jump off a building I am losing my fucking mind#it’s so over#lmao my brain is fucked i genuinely wanna off myself over this shit#and my mother keeps refusing to even entertain the idea of getting my name changed on the school role#even though all my teachers and friends call me Alex and that’s what I’ve been going by for a few years now#and it would make things significantly easier for everyone because it would fix my email name as well#so that’s not helping#and she was talking about my period and being all “it’s okay all WOMEN get these ❤️ you’re just becoming a beautiful woman#and now she keep being rude to my sister because she uses men’s deodorant (because it works better) and doesn’t really wear dresses#(because she finds them annoying and inconvenient)#and is being all “hurr durr you’re copying your SISTER stop being so masculine”#like fucking hell#shit talking me and harassing my sister all at once#man I want to fucking kill myself im so done with this shit#and I’m so overdue on school work and I feel so overwhelmed and stressed this fucking sucks#and I know the school work and stuff is fully my fault for forgetting and slacking off but I can’t bring myself to do them because the#stress of fucking up and just how much of it I have to do is pushing me to my damn limit#I can’t even bring myself to start on my film and media assignment that’s a week overdue because I’m so fucking stressed just thinking about#it and I’m so overwhelmed I can’t fucking do this. I just can’t. and I know I’m at fault for procrastinating and being too lazy and stressed#to bring myself to start working on it#and things are just gonna get more and more difficult#so yeah. rant over I guess. sorry guys#did not mean to rant in the tags this much dysphoria is just killing me and so is general stress#tw suicidal thoughts
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