#i need a rest holy hell
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coridallasmultipass · 10 months ago
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Shit Post venting hour let's go:
Trans Bro/Trans Dirk has endometriosis (*enBROmetriosis, because people are shitty and don't get that guys have it, too), even AFTER getting a hysterectomy, because, unfortunately, sometimes our bodies are just transphobic like that. (True story, bro...) He doesn't get symptoms regularly post-op, but when they hit, they hit like a plane-wreck - it's a huge disaster for one, and it also becomes everyone else's business.
Trans Dave doesn't have endo, but still goes through a lot of pain relievers for normal cramps. He forgot to tell Bro they were out of medicine last time.
Cue Bro stuck hugging the toilet, sick from how much pain he's in as soon as he wakes up, and Dave doesn't hear him call out for healing.
As soon as Dave hears Bro talking about Advil, he immediately remembers his mistake and realizes why Bro's been extra volatile lately (PMS/PMDD/etc).
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possumkingluca · 1 year ago
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after 125ish orbs (maybe a few more i don't remember) and a little over 5 hours the gods finally answered my prayers 🙏
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i am going to burst into tears i have never put this much effort into anything in my life i normally give up once something gets a little too annoying but alas i persevered
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angryborzois · 5 months ago
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well that was something
#angryborzois rambles#holy shit this is a long story#basically as a class we all went to this historic place on the top of a mountain (we had to do a long hike to get up there)#and a friend and i decided to stay afterward to mess around#my friend wanted to reenact kny scenes so i was like ok lets do it (shh we're idiots with zero brain cells)#and the place was pretty cool to hang out in soo why not#but soon it started thundering in the distance so we decided to start heading down the mountain#it was all shits and laughs until we made it down the mountain (tho we heard a weird noise once and got scared bc what if its a boar)#once down the mountain we had to navigate the woods around the area to get to the station#it was a very long route and on top of that it started pouring heavily#and anyway we walked for a long ass time in the rain when we encountered a suspicious person#it didnt help that before we saw this guy we saw a poster for a wanted criminal in the area#the guy was way ahead of us but we sensed bad vibes from him so we tried to let him walk ahead but he just...waited for us??#(he was in the direction we needed to go)#for a couple minutes we tried to trail way behind him but every time we stopped to let him walk on he would suddenly stop and stall#after a while we completely stopped for a few minutes to observe and in response he hid in the bushes?? so we decided something was def up#we were very alarmed and we quietly snuck out of his view and then ran for it#i genuinely worried that maybe we were gonna get killed in these woods#we backtracked a little and took a different path that went in the direction we needed to go#i was a little concerned because at one point the path had an intersection that merged with the first path we were in#but i didnt want to risk cutting through pure woods and i wanted to be at the very least on an animal trail than anything so no choice ig#and so we quietly snuck past the intersection but thankfully no one was around#a few minutes after that we heard a weird radio voice?? so we freaked out and ran the rest (prob unrelated but u can never be too sure)#and after a while of pure stress we made it out of the woods and to civilization#i was drenched but oh boy i was so happy#my friend and i agreed though that it was fucked up that we had to be more scared of a human than the wilderness#but everything after that was fine#im honestly glad it was pouring though because i think it helped cover the sounds of us getting away#well tbh i have a feeling he prob saw us get away but just didnt bother chasing bc the paths were muddy as hell and he was kinda far#but yeah that was def smthing
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torgawl · 1 year ago
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the more we discover about dion's father and anabella the more i'm happy dion impaled the shit out of that motherfucker and the more frustrated i become anabella got an easy death by killing herself. not that i expected clive or joshua to do anything because i don't think they're those types of people but it would have been satisfying to me
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yellowheartz · 8 months ago
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One thing's for sure that after the last grade level, I am strictly unqualified to be a director in a stageplay. I think I'll just stick to scriptwriting, thanks.
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paintedbutton · 1 year ago
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I'm pretty sure anyone who works with the public in any capacity knows the feeling, but this week someone definitely poured the asshole bucket out on accident, and I am done with humanity.
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acerikus · 2 years ago
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If anyone wants my thoughts on scarlet and violet I'm liveblogging over at @pyromaniac-cyndaquil btw 👀
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lyss-butterscotch · 1 year ago
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WHAT THE FACK WHAT THE SHIT WHAT THE FAVK WGAT THE SHIT WGAT THE FACK WHAT THE SHIT WHATTHE F
res. Bestie. Amigo. Fren. Sunstone brother in arms. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS
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WH WHY WHAT WHEN THIS ISNT FACKING RETALIATION THIS IS WAR
WHAT THE FACK ARE YOU DOING TO ME WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO SO FACKING HARD ON THIS IM BAWLING JDJDJDJSJJSKDKKDKDKDKDMKDKDKMSMD
Violence on my mind @lyss-butterscotch
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Ain't it fun when your 'close friend' is semi conscious and being forced to attack you? And you have to decide if you should put him out of his misery? :)
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ikiprian · 8 months ago
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Tim swears Phantom could’ve been a Titan. Maybe he should be, at this point. They have enough in common to justify it.
“Jeez,” Phantom groans. Abruptly, he drops the levitation and hits the roof without sound. He stretches out on his back like a cat, sore muscles straining in a way Red Robin deeply relates to. “Fighting the living sucks. At least with ghosts I can swing as hard as I need. Already dead means they get back up! But mortals? Way too squishy.”
Red Robin huffs in agreement. “Yeah,” he says. After a moment’s consideration, he lies down, too.“It’s a hundred times harder than people realize. Batman’s always going on about perfect control in training. About how to have it, you gotta be twice as skilled as the other guy. Even without your super-strength, I worry sometimes.”
“How do you do it?” Phantom asks. In a move only achievable to those without bones, or perhaps Dick Grayson, he twists himself over. Gloved hands cup his cheeks. His legs kick back and forth, like they’re gossiping at a slumber party. “I mean. You said you train, so obviously there’s the physical ‘how.’ But how do you keep your emotions nonlethal? How do you keep yourself in check, make sure you’re pulling back?”
“I mean,” says Red Robin. “Murder is illegal, so.”
Phantom sighs. “Yeah. Maybe it’s easier for you.”
… Hm. Maybe Red Robin should redo Phantom’s risk assessment.
Before he can raise too high an eyebrow (though even moving that muscle smarts, ow), Phantom elaborates.
“Ecto-based entities have trouble with their emotions,” he explains. “It’s easy to get lost in an Obsession, or a big feeling like grief. The rest of the world… it bleeds away. Helps to have another emotional anchor to keep it at bay. I use fear.”
“Fear?” Red Robin glanced over.
“Sometimes sheer stubbornness,” Phantom admits. “But a lot of it is fear.”
With a considering frown, he drops his head atop his arms. Exhaustion, regret, reluctance play out on his face. For someone the Bats know next to nothing about, Phantom’s body language is an open book.
“I saw, like, an alternate future version of myself once where I become evil and try to take over the world? So now I gotta be good to keep that from happening. The fear of that future keeps the pressure on me. Makes me focus up. Y’know?”
Tim sits up. “Seriously?”
Phantom nods. “Uh-huh. Kinda bizarre, I know—”
“What the hell,” says Tim. Three consecutive days together and a concussion must loosen his lips, because holy shit, no way. “Dude! Me too!”
“Huh? Seriously?” says Phantom.
“Yeah! I totally saw myself turn evil. Like, Batman but with guns. Guns Batman. I had to fight him and everything. He tried to kill my friends and erase my memory to make sure I couldn’t un-invent him by going back to change the past?”
“Oh my god.”
“What?”
“Oh my god, me too!”
happy wips wednesday!
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blondwhxrewrites · 4 months ago
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Someone requested on how Mattheo found out about bunny!Reader being an animagus and oh my gosh this has been stewing in my mind for days
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"Oi, Mattheo, your girlfriend needs you!"
Mattheo looked confused as his eyes flitted down to the bunny in Pansy's outstretched arms. The last time he remembered, his girlfriend was not a bunny. "Pansy, that's a bunny." He studied his friend's expression, trying to gauge whether she was being serious or not. 
Pansy rolled her eyes and forcibly pushed the bunny into his arms, catching Mattheo by surprise as he quickly adjusted the bunny to sit comfortably against his chest, cradled in his arms. "I know it's a bunny, you moron! Princess freaked out, and suddenly—poof! She was a bunny!" She explained, gesturing wildly to the bunny in a state of panic.
Mattheo raised a brow and looked down at the bunny, who only stared up at him with its wide, beady eyes. He knew that stare anywhere. "Holy shit, it is princess!" He exclaimed, holding up the bunny in front of him to look at it in shock, the action leaving its lower half dangling in the air.  How in the bloody hell did this even happen?
"She's an animagus, you gits." Theo chimed in from where he sat on the nearby couch, reading a book with his leg crossed over his other. "She probably got overwhelmed and decided it was easier to process things as a bunny."
"And how do you know this?" Questioned Mattheo as he gently maneuvered your bunny form to once again rest against his chest. He couldn't help but want to coo as you snuggled right into his embrace. Damn—it was really you.
Theo shrugged, not bothering to look up from his book. "I hooked up with one of her friends and they mentioned her being a bunny animagus."
Mattheo opted to ignore the first bit of information and instead began to scratch under your chin, seeing how it relaxed you. "Okay, so my girlfriend can turn into a bunny at will—why do I have a feeling I'm going to have to deal with this a lot.." 
"Probably because you are."
"Theo, shut up."
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deadsetobsessions · 10 months ago
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Alley Drunk! Danny AU- Part 1
[Pt.2] [Pt.3] [Pt.4]
To not turn into a giant raging asshole hell bent on murdering people and destroying the world after everyone he loved died, Danny had ran from Amity with his chosen vice.
A bottle. That’s right. Even after Jazz’s talks about alcoholism as a poor coping mechanism as a form of self harm, he still chose alcohol. Or maybe that’s why he picked it, because it reminded him of her, right before the booze took the sting of grief off of her memory. He was never really all that good at listening to Jazz.
And now she’s gone, so it’s moot point. Danny really hated Nasty Burger.
Danny made it all the way to Gotham, bottle constantly glued to his hand. It’s better than Vlad’s creep-o-self looming over him all of the time. He bummed out on the streets, fitting into crime alley like a native. Danny learned to pickpocket. Not much, just enough for a bottle when his ran out. He stayed human. At first he tried to convince himself that it was because he didn’t want to be perceived as a meta in a city where Batman notoriously disliked metas. Then, as he sunk deeper, he admitted to himself in a shameful curl of a whisper that it was really because alcohol affected his human side much easier.
Ghosts need an ungodly amount of alcohol to even get slightly buzzed. Danny’s human side? Only one full bottle the shittiest tequila he could find could even hope to be more than buzzed. It sucked.
He’s spent two years being an alcoholic that didn’t actually get that drunk. Technically, underage drinking was a crime. But then again, so was being a vigilante ghost. So, whatever. He does what he can to dull the grief. Mostly, he slept on covered and hidden nooks on top of Crime Alley’s roofs. Gotham city had taken pity on him and cleared her smog clouds when he was awake at night. Stargazing helped, at least. It gave him a little hope. It gave him a little wish to change and better and live like he wants. But then the night ends and when the day comes, Jazz isn’t there. Sam isn’t there. Tucker isn’t there. His mom and dad are not there.
Danny always went back to the bottle, in the end. Not that it did much.
Which was why, when he saw three looming figures over a tiny child, Danny’s saving people thing flared with a vengeance and his surprised ectoplasm burned what little buzz he had achieved by downing most of the bottle away, leaving him stone cold sober and pissed.
Danny sighed, dumping the rest of the nasty tasting liquid out. There’s no point drinking that little.
He approached the trio, who were beating up an actual child. Ancients, he hated Crime Alley sometimes.
“Give me your shit, you little punk!” Asshole 1 decided to say like a typical mugger, raising his leg to kick the curled up kid below. Danny doesn’t let him land the kick, smashing the bottle on the asshole’s head before any of them clocked his presence. He pivots, pushing a bit of that extra strength he normally keeps on a tight leash into his hands, and punched the other two in a quick fashion, knocking them out.
With that taken care of, Danny turned back to the kid who was still curled up. Danny sighed again, the trembles in small shoulders plucking on his heartstrings.
“You okay, kid?”
The kid uncurls, and Danny stared. Holy shit, is he looking into a mirror? Blue eyes, black hair, and tanned skin. Holy shit, he’s even got similar jaws to Danny.
“Huh.”
The kid flinched.
“Y-y’er the drunk,” the kid flinched again, eyes darting to the broken bottle still clenched in Danny’s hand. “I- I ain’t got money, honest. Please-”
Danny blinked down at the kid, brain connecting the dots after so long without actual interaction. He’s panicking and staring at the bottle in Danny’s hand like it’ll kill him. Danny raised the bottle and the kid closed his mouth with a click, terror worming its way into the kid’s eyes.
“I wasn’t going to mug you myself, kid.”
“But- y’er the- the Alley drunk.”
Danny blinked. Did he get a reputation without knowing again? Goddammit.
“I guess. Am I famous or somethin’?”
“Nobody- nobody fucks wit’ ya.”
“I also don’t hurt kids.”
“…”
The kid stared at him dubiously and with a sinking feeling, Danny realized that maybe the kid already had some terrible experiences with a heavy drunken hand. He promptly chucks the bottle further into the alley.
“I drink, yes. But I’m also not the kind of scum that would lay hands on a kid, let alone anyone that didn’t provoke it first.”
“Oh.” The kid uncurled more, looking at Danny warily, more at ease now that the bottle has left the chat.
“Yeah. I’m Danny. Stone cold sober, right now.”
“…”
Danny waited.
“Peters.”
“Okay. Peters, do you wanna take their shit?” Danny pointed a thumb at the knocked out would-be-muggers behind him.
“Y… yeah, sure. What’s my cut?”
“All of it.”
Peters stared.
Danny shrugged and started looting.
"Y'er so fuckin' weird."
----
See, the thing is, Danny hadn't anticipated saving Peters- "'s actually Jason"- would result in having a duckling following him around. The kid, Jason, glared at everyone who even looked at them wrong. But that's not the problem, because Danny could take anyone who took issue with Jason's looks, it's more like there's a child following him around now and Danny doesn't want to be the reason Jason turns into an alcoholic. It's- well, it made him cut down on the drinking. He even got jobs- legitimate jobs that sucks out his his poor ectoplasmic soul.
Why? Because Jason's apparently homeless. While that's something Danny's okay with for himself, he can't ever condone that for an actual child. Jason's walking around in threadbare clothes and thin soled shoes in the middle of Fall, for Ancient's sake.
Danny grumbles as he piled a bunch of clothes into the shopping bag as he checked out. Gotham's Walmart is a different kind of hell, but Danny feels right at home.
Sure, the work might suck out his soul and he might hate being sober, but Jason's face every time he comes home to an actual place to live, warm clothes, and food was worth everything.
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frenchy-and-the-sea · 22 days ago
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Some context: after narrowly avoiding being arrested, we've been told that we are on thin fucking ice and we are having an eye kept on us by the city guard. Implication is that if we're caught with even one toe out of line, we're going to be dragged to the "Reformation Center," which appears to be as bad as it sounds. The very next day, the rogue (who was the cause of our initial arrest and the cause of the town nearly being burnt down because he got greedy about stealing stuff, and who didn't get dragged in front of the town leader to explain himself and we had to cover for him) shows up again and immediately tries to steal the golden holy symbol we found while Wyn was trying to dig up information on the removal of curses. Note: this is not a useful holy symbol. It is not a +1, it's not magical, and it's not for Wyn's god. It just happens to be gold.
Wyn tells him to knock it off and that we're trying to keep our heads down after things went to shit because of what he did. My man decides to STEAL IT ANYWAY, and uses sleight of hand to do it. BUT, OF COURSE, HE ALREADY SAID HE WANTED TO STEAL IT. SO OF COURSE WYN KNOWS WHERE IT IS. So she walks over, grabs his arm, reads him the riot act about how his greed has almost killed us TWICE at this point, and tells him that he needs to put the holy symbol back. She tells him that she's not kidding this time. She tells him that this is his last warning. He tells her that he's not gonna put it back.
So she pumps a 3rd level Inflict Wounds on him and dropped his HP to 4.
Now he has disappeared from the sight of the party, and the last that we the players heard, he was hovering outside of the tavern window, trying to get dirt on the party so that he could turn Wyn into the city guard.
So, you know. Good times.
WELP. UH. WYN ATTACKED THE ROGUE TODAY BECAUSE HE KEPT TRYING TO STEAL SHIT. SO. DUNNO HOW THAT'S GONNA SHAKE OUT. 😬
#hush frenchy#i need a curse of strahd tag#i was SWEATING through it but. i feel justified in Wyn's response!! she was mad as hell!!#the rest of the party also stepped in too but despite wyn hitting harder and first they went to her aid#the wizard tried to hit the rogue with a chair after he stabbed wyn post-fight#and the fighter got between them but put his back to wyn because he considered her less of the aggressor#which wyn was like#SO grateful for#she was pissed off but MAN at least she wasn't treated like she was just some emotional idiot#the wyn tag#edit: looking back this does not express the sheer amount of times that the rogue has stolen something that fucked us over#even when being asked to stop#if asked to put something back he just immediately sleight of hand's it#twice it has triggered dangerous combat#three times it has been wyn asking him not to touch something because there's a dangerous effect on it and he just ignores her#thus the anger on her part LMAO#its a huge contrast to the fact that when we found that holy symbol there was a silvered dagger with it#and our wizard picked it up and went 'hey do we wanna take this? it might be useful'#and then waited to get the group opinion#immediately after was the rogue trying to steal the holy symbol so like. lol. lmao even.#this character is clearly doing this on purpose to be shitty#and I wish i knew WHY. because it seems to have no motivation at all!! which would make things interesting!!#okay now I'm actually done
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evil-maryland · 2 months ago
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OOC: NOTE THINGY
50 Notes and ill tell my parents i want psychological help again
200 Notes and ill study ahead in french
700 Notes and ill study ahead in maths(god no)
900 Notes and ill study the whole next theme for the rest of this year for history
1200 Notes and ill actually take care of myself
1500 Notes and ill do own brain studies n stuff
1800 Notes ill continue learning to code and making my own website
2000 Notes and ill actually do the damn thing ive been trying to do
??? Notes random option you choose what i should do(not of the list above) and also the note amount needed. im gonna put them in a random wheel or do a poll
EDIT1: i forgot to add rules.... maryland pls only like an eight of the postlimit max (this includes all ur blogs) everyone else free tho
EDIT2: changing Note amounts cuz holy hell
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vivwritesfics · 3 months ago
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Cowgirl
He was just there to see Kate, to make sure she was all right after what happened. He didn't expect to run into the pretty cowgirl and her horse.
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There was an unfamiliar white truck in the driveway. There was always unfamiliar trucks in the driveway, always some rich asshole trying to purchase the land out from under their feet.
She patted her horse's neck as she looked at the truck. Storm Par. Tye name didn't tell her as much as she wanted it to. "Come on, Gambler." She tensed her leg against the horse's side and walked him towards the barn.
It was late, so late that she knew her mother would be furious with her. Her sister was always the good one, the one with high expectations placed on her shoulders. Expectations that she'd exceeded.
Jumping from Gamblers saddle, she walked him into the barn and did everything she needed to do. Untacked him, fed him, made sure the little makeshift stable was clean and he had enough food and water for the night.
They got a small corner of the barn. The rest of it was full of Kate's stuff. She couldn't be mad about that, not when Kate's stuff was so cool. But it also served as a grim reminded that she wasn't there, and hadn't been for years.
Shutting the barn for the night, she made her way back to the house. Storm Par, she'd seen that truck somewhere before, she just couldn't put her finger on it. She tried to look in the truck, but it was too dark to see anything.
She made her way inside of the house, toed off her dirty boots and dropped her keys in the bowl. Shrugging off her jacket, she hung it over the banister and made her way to the kitchen.
Her stomach made a desperate noise as she looked in the fridge for the leftovers. "I know, I know," she mumbled to herself, setting about heating it up.
Footsteps, on the stairs. "Mom?" She called over her shoulder. "Sorry I'm late, we lost track of time."
The person didn't respond as she stirred the leftovers in the pan to heat it up. When she turned around, her breath caught in her throat.
There stood her sister. Kate, the good one, the smart one, the one that had disappeared to New York. "Holy shit," she breathed as she looked at her. "Holy fuckin' shit."
"Hi," Kate said and swallowed.
She'd imagined this moment several times, what it would be like to be reunited with Kate. Had imagined running into her arms and holding her so tight that she couldn't leave again.
But, now that they were here, she was at a loss. It didn't feel right to embrace Kate in such a dramatic fashion, didn't feel right to do anything but just look at her.
She turned and stirred the leftovers in the pan. "What're you doing back?" She asked as she began to plate it up.
Kate shrugged her shoulders. "I was nearby," she said and sat at the kitchen table, sat in the seat opposite her. "Were you out with Gambler?"
She nodded as she ate.
No, it isn't bad writing, the conversation was stale. The sisters didn't quite know what so say to each other. Where had they left off when Kate disappeared? Why had she left them behind?
She didn't mean to resent her sister for getting out, for leaving her behind. Their mother had been so distraught when Kate left for New York, but she understood why. She still had her other daughter there. Her other daughter who wanted to leave, who wanted to travel across the country and make a life for herself.
Clearing her throat, she stood up. "I'll see you tomorrow," she mumbled and took her food up to her room. Kate wasn't blonde the last time she saw her. But that seemed to be the only difference.
She looked out of her window, looked at the Storm Par truck in the drive. It must have been Kate's truck, she decided and sat at her computer.
It was so easy to find information on Storm Par. To find out who they were, to find out what they did. The what wasn't important, and the who was only kind of important. It was the why that she cared about. And, when she found that out, why the hell would Kate work for a company like this?
A sour feeling settled in her stomach as she went to bed that night.
***
"Someone's feeling fresh," she mumbled as she walked Gambler forward. But Gambler didn't want to walk; he wanted to go.
She turned him in a sharp circle, since holding him back wasn't doing anything to stop him from taking off. "You wanna run, Gamble?" She challenged, walking him to the end of the drive. He was practically galloping on the spot.
When they get to the wide open field in front of them, she let him go. Gambler went. He galloped, snorting as he went. She held the mane and let him run until he got to the other end of the field. At the other end of the field, she got Gambler back under control and began walking him back to the house. Halfway across the field, she pushed him into a nice, controlled canter.
An unfamiliar red truck was parked in the driveway, parked beside the Storm Par truck. She squeezed on the reins, slowed Gambler down as she watched the guy climb out of the red truck. The cowboy hat on his head looked performative as he placed it back in his truck.
"Can I help you?" She asked as she walked Gambler over to him.
He was gorgeous. His charm was written in smile as he looked around at her home. Upon seeing her, his charming smile dropped from his face. "Uh, yeah," he said and turned again. "Is Kate here?" He asked.
She blew out a breath and gestured for him to follow her. He did, walking a good distance behind Gambler. "Are you with Storm Par as well?" She asked as she rode, the reins in one hand and her other hand resting on her thigh.
To Tyler, she looked all the bit the cowgirl. He knew cowgirls, he was an ex rodeo man, after all. This was the kind of girl he would have chased after before he went to study meteorology. "No," he said, that charming smile slowly reappearing on his face. "I do chase, though."
"Ah," she said as she jumped from the saddle and grabbed a hold of the reins. "You're one of those freaks." It was said completely in jest, the tone of her voice suggested. She pushed open the barn doors and led Tyler inside. "Kate," she called across the barn. "Someone here for you."
Tyler watched as she took her horse to the little stable in the back of the barn. And then he turned his attention to Kate.
All the time she was in the barn, Tyler couldn't help but look at her. She had a Stetson hanging off the stable door as she gave her horse a bath. It shouldn't have been distracting but, to Tyler, it was. She was just cleaning her horse, massaging the purple shampoo into his grey coat.
Every time Kate caught him staring, Tyler had the decency to quickly look away. But Kate just grinned at him and told him her name. "She's my sister," she said quietly.
He didn't expected to get invited to dinner. "You should," said Kate as she looked further into the barn. "She's cooking." Tyler looked back at her as she grabbed a black bucket and filled it with horse food.
Her cooking was incredible. She wore her Stetson as she brought the food to the table outside. Kate set the table as she placed an array of food on the middle of the table.
"Thank you, cowgirl," said Tyler as she placed the salad down in front of him.
Her cheeks were so hot as she sat in the seat opposite him. "Don't mention it," she muttered and began plating everything up.
It was easy not to look at her when her mother was asking him so many questions, questions he was happy to answer. But she hadn't stopped looking at him. Feeling like a creep, she tried to stay focused on her dinner. But his voice. Fuck, it was something else.
"What about you?"
She hadn't even realised he was talking to her. With her mouth full, she looked up at him. "What?" She asked around the food in her mouth.
"Do you like storms?"
It probably wouldn't have been such an odd question if she had been paying attention to the conversation. She shook her head. "Don't get me wrong, they're pretty. But you wouldn't catch me dead outside in one."
Tyler's entire focus was on her, as if he'd forgotten her mother and Kate were there. "I bet I could change your mind," he said, voice full of confidence.
She took the challenge, copied his pose as she leaned towards him. "Oh yeah? And how are you gonna do that?" She tried to copy the expression on his face, the charming grin he had so easily mastered.
He sat back in his seat and looked towards his truck. "You'll see, Cowgirl."
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st0ryf1lms · 5 months ago
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is it really you? ➳ ken sato
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pairing: ken sato x reader
word count: 866
genre/warnings: fluff, sort of a crack fic, 3+1 things, wrote this with a sarcastic tone LMAO, a bit of profanity, grammatical errors most likely (wrote this at 1AM), reader uses fem pronouns
synopsis: the 3 times kenji sato swore he saw you, and the 1 time he actually saw you.
a/n: yes, i'm finally giving in to the kenji sato brainrot HUHUHUH if i had known he was the reason my writer's block would disappear, would've watched the movie sooner i'm ngl edit: AAAAAA WHAT 600+ NOTES??? U GUYS ARE INSANEEE I LOVE YOU ALL this is now up on my ao3!!
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At the New Tokyo Dome at his first game as a Giants player
Maybe he was just dreaming, maybe it was the fatigue actually catching up to him ever since he hopped off that plane, or maybe he did actually see you in that stadium amongst the crowd cheering his name. You, as in his childhood best friend, arguably one of the best parts of his childhood in Japan before leaving for LA. You, as in the childhood best friend he never got to say a proper goodbye to. You, as in the childhood best friend whom he always missed and cried to his mom about whenever he'd get homesick. (You, as in the childhood best friend he'd harbored a secret crush on as a kid. As an adult? Psh, what sane person gets hung up on a person who must've forgotten him all those years ago. Not Ken Sato, for sure, yeah, uh-huh.) He'd never know for certain, of course, because as he was about to stop and look, a Kaiju crashed a KDF plane into the ceiling of the stadium.
KAIJU ALERT, his watch blared in an angry red face. He sighed, making his way to the nearest stadium exit and heading towards the dimly-lit part of the street by the stadium. Not without stopping for a split second because he thought he saw your silhouette. Silhouette, really? My God, Kenji, pull yourself together, he told himself. Of course, that wouldn’t be your silhouette because he definitely doesn’t know what you look like anymore, what food you like, what your job is, how you held up after he left for LA. Of course, he doesn’t know that.
Shaking off any more thoughts of you, Kenji turned into his giant alter-ego to fight off the Kaiju wreaking havoc on the streets of Tokyo. (a distraction, really, as Mina would say.)
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2. On a grocery run looking exhausted as hell.
It had been two weeks since he took in the baby kaiju in his basement and Kenji Sato has never been more exhausted. If you ask him, exhausted would be an understatement. Nevertheless, his mind was actually alive (much to Mina's surprise) because he swears this time, that he actually saw you. With his own two eyes. As if locked in a daze, he secretly followed you like a lost puppy with a push cart in the grocery store before realizing you were heading for the exit. He stopped in his tracks as the doors opened for you, realizing the items he got weren't paid for yet.
Begrudgingly, he went back inside the grocery and got the rest of the items he needed before going back to his house.
Next time, I swear, I'll talk to her, Kenji said to himself as he drove back to his place.
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3. During Emi's acid reflux rampage.
Shit, shit, shit, he cursed to himself like a mantra as he zoomed across the streets of Tokyo on his bike, trying to chase after the pink baby kaiju that somehow escaped his basement that he explicitly placed under the care of Mina (in case you couldn’t tell, he's definitely glaring at his AI assistant). Looking at the construction site beside him as he sat in traffic, an idea popped in his head. He could use that to give him a boost to quickly get to the baby. He rode up the makeshift ramp and turned into his giant alter-ego, catching his bike in time.
"Holy shit." He froze. Goddammit, had he really been that careless? Changing in front of a civilian? Nervously chuckling, he turned around to face the owner of the voice, mentally preparing his response [read: excuse] only to be wide-eyed and speechless. The owner of the voice was you. You, as in his childhood best friend, whom he's been trying to catch up with ever since he landed in Japan.
"What the fuck! Ultraman is Ke-" You exclaimed before you got rudely interrupted by the giant superhero. "Hey, shhh! Can we, like, stay quiet on this matter? I know I don't have an NDA right now but my bike will suffice, I guess. I'll get it back from you, I swear, I just really have to take care of this right now. Treat you to our usual spot? Thanks!" He said frantically before running away to take care of his huge baby problem.
Not really the best way to reconnect with your childhood best friend.
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+1. After the battle at sea with the KDF.
"Hey, sorry for being late, had to take care of something." He apologized as he jogged up to you on your usual hang-out spot when you were children. You reassured him, saying that you had just arrived, too. "I didn't know what kinda stuff you eat now as an athlete superstar so I just went for the safest convenience store options." You said sheepishly, holding up the plastic bags with a weary smile. "I don't mind, I actually like convenience store snacks." He beamed on how you still remember what he used to like as a kid.
"So, Ken Sato, gonna explain?"
"Oh, you're gonna want to sit down for this."
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reallyromealone · 8 months ago
Text
Title: oh hey a mate(s)
Chapter: one
Fandom: obey me
Pairing: demon brother's x male reader
Warnings: suggestive themes, readers got truama, internalized gender hatred, anxiety, panic attacks, mentions of being a breeding tool, self hate, reader doesn't really understand sex, sexual themes, omegaverse, male reader, mentions of mpreg
🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️
"HE STOLE THEM FROM ME!" (sisters name) Screeched out in a rage as she threw things around "they were supposed to be MY mates! And he stole them! That whore stole them!" She was hyperventilating at this point as her body shook, feeling robbed of her alphas.
Of her life, the thing she wanted more than anything.
"I know sweety but maybe we can set you up wit--"" I don't want someone else! I want the princes!"
And she was going to get them.
She swore it.
'fuck you (name)'
Holy shit this place was big.
God he felt under dressed, especially beside these alphas who were dressed so fancy and perfect.
The floors were marble and two grand staircases winded on each side and paintings that had to be centuries old hung on the walls "we will have one commissioned for you soon enough... Maybe one with us all" Belphegor yawned as he wandered the halls "for now, let's get you settled in" he said and looked to a nervous looking Leviathan who nodded.
(Name) Was nervous as he walked beside the demon who seemed to want to be anywhere but here "I-im sorry if I wasn't who you were expecting... I'll try and not step on your toes" (name) whispered, anxiously fiddling with his fingers and looked down "i-i dont-- fuck... I'm really nervous and anxious and just I don't really talk to omegas often so I'm just--" the demon seemed panicked and (name) felt relief flood through his veins as he pumped out calming pharamones for the Alpha "hey... I get it, if it's any consolation... I'm not great with people either-- hell I think this is the first time I ever left my families property!" He laughed a bit but Leviathan was shocked at his words "you never been into the capital or even your home town?" He asked genuinely and (name) shook his head "nah, my parents didn't trust me going out there-- you know how troublesome an Omega can be"
What the fuck? That's all Leviathan could think as he looked at the Omega worried "I- you're not troublesome?" He whispered and (name) just smiled "I try not to be" (name) giggled a bit as they continued to (name)s apartment, the Omega expecting a quaint bedroom but...
"I think we went to the wrong room.... This is awfully big" (name) said softly to the envy demon who looked confused "you like your apartment?" Asmodeus popped out from nowhere and pulled (name) close with a flirty grin "we had the butlers being your things in, don't worry we didn't let them unpack... Pharamones and all that ~" he pulled (name) into the apartment and (name) felt overwhelmed by all this "there's a nesting room there~ if you need help don't hesitate to ask"
"A-are you sure?"
"Sure of what?"
"That this is for me?"
"You are to be our mate, I personally wanted you with me but Luci wanted you to have your own space... Something about acclimating" his words teasing and (name) chuckled but cut short when his stomach growled and the two demons looked curious "oh yeah! Humans need to eat for survival!"
(Name) Felt embarrassed as he silently cursed his stomach for exposing him like this as the demons looked at one another in a silent conversation.
They were definitely having a sibling meeting later.
(Name) Dissociated during the rest of the evening, eventually ending back in the rooms he was given, the size of his old house if not a bit bigger...
Everything was pristine as he took out his belongings, his prized possessions and small hobbies to occupy him.
A few heirlooms and books and his childhood stuffed toy 'this will go in my nest' he thought as he looked at the nesting room doors, two ornate doors in a rose gold shade, the apartment all light colors unlike the rest of the palace.
It was a strange contrast, almost like they didn't know what to expect so they just made what they thought humans liked. It was funny really, demons trying to understand what humans wanted or needed as he was doing the same, wondering what these demons wanted or liked.
Getting up he went to the nesting room and was overwhelmed by the nesting supplies he was given, piles and piles of blankets and pillows and soft things, his purring could probably be heard from outside the apartment as he snuggled into them, a sense of safety he wasn't quite used to washing over him.
He was excited to make a large nest, spending half the night making it perfect for him to rest in and just not think about the fact he was to be mated on his next heat to seven strangers that were also fucking royalty! Well there goes not thinking about it because here he was!
Also his sister! Holy shit she was mad! And like at his wedding she will be there! Fuuck!
(Name) Was just sitting there head in hands as he processed the fact that within 24 hours he was now engaged and now in the public eye!
(Name) Curled up closer into his blankets and let out a shutter of a sigh, he wondered if he would be able to do the things he enjoyed before... Would he be allowed to garden? Would he have to dress more Omegan? Or would he be able to wear clothes that were comfortable?!
He needed to walk, movement to process this.
Getting up he walked out of his apartment and into the hall, dark and grand, ceilings at least 15 feet tall and paintings lined, some he recognized as the siblings and some unfamiliar as he walked around curiously.
Somehow he made it to the kitchen "I hope they don't mind..." (Name) Whispered as he sliced an apple, careful and gentle as his stomach growled a bit.
"Can I have some?" A voice startled him out of his thoughts causing him to slice his finger "shit!" The voice said and (name) looked to see Beelzebub who in turn looked a bit startled as he took (name)s bleeding finger and put it in his mouth, the Omega looking thoroughly concerned as Beelzebub sucked on the blood "I feel like this is incredibly unsanitary" (name) whispered worried and beez released his finger "demons saliva can heal amongst other things, depends on the demon really"
"Oh " (name) said dumbly as he looked at his wet but healed finger "what else does your saliva do?" He asked curiously and Beelzebub smiled at the others cute and curious expression "ah, well besides healing my saliva can work as an aphrodisiac if ingested!" (Name) Looked concerned and Beelzebub laughed "don't worry, it only works if I were to like make out with you or eat your ass!"
And now (name) was flustered as the gluttony demon kept laughing at his embarrassment "so why are you up so late?" Beelzebub asked after calming down and sealing some apple slices and cutting up some more, handing (name) an orange "just... It's stupid"
"Oh please!" Beelzebub pushed and (name) sighed "I'm just... I'm having trouble processing this stuff, it's stressful and like-- I never left my property let alone this! My sister wanted to be with you guys and she's already insufferable, this is just worse! I'm just paranoid that you guys are going to realize that like this was a mistake and reject me and like the fear of being an Omega in general! Will I be able to do the things i enjoyed before? Will I be a breeding tool?!" He was hyperventilating now as Beelzebub panicked "hey hey, calm down! It will be alright and-- no we aren't making you a breeding Omega.... shhh" beez tried to calm him as footsteps quickly made their way to the kitchen.
"What is happening?" Lucifer and the others seemed startled as the smell of distress was heavy in the kitchen "he's worried we will strip him of his rights and make him carry our young" Beelzebub explained as he lifted (name) into his arms and set him on the counter "were demons but we aren't monsters" Satan said disgusted and Asmodeus smiled "we would never do that unless it's what you're into~" he teased the Omega as they crowded him "I know it's an incredibly hard adjustment but know we mean well, it's literally impossible for us to not fall for each other" it's true soulmates would eventually fall for one another due to the bond "and we are sharing one mate so that means you have seven people to love you" mammon said in a rare moment of genuine care "what do you mean?"
"Oh yeah, he knows basically nothing about secondary gender or soulmates" Levi said softly and the demons looked horrified "well I know what we are doing tomorrow" Satan said simply and (name) looked ashamed and couldn't meet their eyes, feeling stupid for his lack of knowledge.
"Well his town is backwards" Belphegor yawned and wandered off back to bed now that the problem was solved "goodnight...."
(Name) Was led back to his room by Beelzebub and Asmodeus and looked confused when they put sweaters in his arms "the smell of your alphas will calm you~" Asmodeus said simply and the two wished him a good night.
And for once?
He sleped peacefully.
(Name) Spent the next few days learning about soulmates and secondary genders, the two interlocking "when your heat comes, it will be dangerous for you to not mate with your soulmate" (name) read the book in his off time, the book explaining how the bonding is key to not cause rejection symptoms or a drop, he definitely didn't want that. Fuck how does he have sex? Fuck.
Time to go figure that out, he really felt behind on this shit.
(Name) Made home in the library as he looked for any books that would aid him "Hmm? Looking for sex books ~ didn't know our omega was like that" Asmodeus seemed to love just appearing out of thin air and scaring (name) who dropped the book "i-i it's not like that!"
"Hmmm? And what is it about? Oh you're so cute when your flustered!" He cooed and (name) huffed "I am trying to figure out like, how sex works and stuff... I wasn't exactly taught... Just put on suppressants so my family could avoid it" he just constantly felt ashamed with them, their faces of realization and pity as (name) tried not to cry "well, if you like I could teach you~ don't worry I won't touch you where you don't like" Asmodeus could get used to his omega so flustered as he got closer, his alpha giddy at his mate being untouched "the first thing one should know is their body after all~"
"I- uh... I'm not sure..."
Asmodeus let his lips barely touch (name)s as he caged him against a bookshelf and smiled, his tail flickering and (name) seemed a bit startled by it All as the demon gently kissed him "that was... Uh.." "your first kiss?"
"Yeah..."
"Did you like it?"
(Name) Could only nod as the lust avatar giggled sweetly at his adorable Omega "oh, you're going to fit in nicely here~!" He doted on (name) a bit "don't worry darling, we won't do anything your not ready for but if you're willing... To experiment a bit, I'm always a summon away" and with that he was gone, (name) left with nothing more than the smell of his pharamones, sweet Jasmine and warm vanilla.
It wasn't till after lunch that Lucifer brought him to the gardens, a small greenhouse and a garden plot stood "we had it cleaned up, you said you liked gardening" he said simply and looked down at (name) who looked like he was given the potion of youth "really? Thank you so much..." (Name) Was releasing the happiest pharamones and Lucifer kept composure but god damn did that boost his ego as an alpha, making his mate happy.
"Just clean yourself off after you finish" Lucifer said calmly and (name) beamed at this "of course!"
(Name) Puttered in the greenhouse and began planting things, thankfully it was early in the season so he had time to make a nursery for plants "oh, sor--" (name) immediately shut up as he saw Belphegor sleeping in a sun beam, cozy and calm. Looking around (name) found his cape that Satan had made for him and covered the demon with it "it's still chilly" he whispered and went back to work, unaware the demon was awake and watching intently at the Omega who was carrying heavy pots and sacks of soil around.
(Name) Kept quiet for the Alpha, he must be so exhausted to fall asleep in a greenhouse of places so it would be best to let him rest! Eventually (name) moved outside, it was less chilly but a slight chill but movement will keep him warm! Using twine he found in the greenhouse he sectioned spots of the garden plots for various things like carrots and garlic amongst others, they were still in the nursery but it's good to get things ready now, he reasoned with himself.
"Your Highness! It's quite cold!" A servant panicked as she saw (name) in nothing more than a shirt and pants and apron, dirt on his cheek "don't worry! I'm alright!" He reasoned but she was not having it and removed her cape "it's not good for an Omega to be cold like this!"
Before she could drape the cape on (name), he felt fur on his shoulders as Mammon smiled with a warning "don't worry, he's warm" his eyes telling the servant to leave and (name) looked confused "oh hello!" (Name) Smiled at the demon who felt annoyed at how sweet the other was, his bond making his heart beat fast "Luci wanted me to take you into town so get ready" he grumbled and (name) nodded, a simple smile on his face as he wandered to the palace "where's your cape anyways?! It's freezing for mortals!" He chastised and (name) chirped "Belphegor was sleeping and I wanted him to be cozy!" (Name) Couldn't explain why he felt so calm and comfortable with the princes but they made him feel safe, even if they were sometimes like angry chihuahuas.
"You're weird" mammon said with no bite as they walked to (name)s area.
The tailors and seamstresses worked tirelessly to put together some clothes for (name) and his new class, the maids commenting about how the seamstress always kept embroidered sleeves on hand as the brothers always tore clothes during training--- well save for Asmodeus and Belphegor who couldn't be fucked to do stuff like that.
(Name) Felt regal, a beautiful vest made of silk and embroidered with birds and roses and a linen powers shirt and nice pants and expensive boots "you look wonderful your Highness!" A maid commented, (name) growing fond of his personal maids who cheered him in, them all being mated and married betas.
(Name) Was curious as he looked around the city, never really interacting with so many people who looked at he two in awe, the guards keeping a fair distance as he looked at stalls "you seriously never been in a city?" Mammon said incredulously and (name) looked confused "no? It's not right for an Omega to be by himself around alphas, I would be a temptation" reiterating his parents words and Mammon was horrified at the omegas genuine belief that HE was the problem and not alphas who couldn't keep their hands to themselves "well we are unpacking that later"
He didn't even want to get into the family thing, remembering the chat he had with his brothers when (name) had his meltdown and the acceptance that their Omega came from a very problematic living situation but he seemed to be acclimating well.
Or at least he hoped.
Mammon was confused as (name) handed him a stuffed bunny "what is this?" He raised an eyebrow from behind his circular sunglasses "well we didn't get to actually court because of being soulmates so I got you all courting gifts" he chirped out innocently, remembering what he was taught by Lucifer and deciding to put it in action though he seemed to have gotten it backwards as it was supposed to be the Alpha who gave the courting gifts.
"I- uh... Thank you?"
(Name) Seemed pleased as they continued their walk through the cities market, a giant hub of the equally giant city as Mammon stared at the bunny that was made of fabric the same color as his eyes, a small detail that made him flustered.
He noticed (name) budgeting, a soft smile on his face "you know we have basically endless money, right?" Well mammon didn't, he was cut off and put on a strict budget but (name)? He still had his money privileges "that's your money, this is so much!" To (name) it was a lot of money as he did the budgeting of the house back with his family, this was ten times of what they made in a year! "I am fine with this"
Hell, how did they get the exact opposite of them?!
A nervous Omega who was innocent and naive and sweet as honey!
"Oh you are absolutely precious!" Asmodeus cooed at the stuffed rabbit that fit in his hands "I hadn't even thought of courting!" He said with exaggerated sadness and (name) watched the others alphas reactions, though it wasn't the fanciest courting gift, it was a genuinely thoughtful one.
"He was worried about spending the money, he literally budgeted it" mammon groaned and Lucifer snorted "you could do well to learn that" he said as (name) seemed reminded and handed him back the coin bag, the Omega barely dented it "I got a few things for my hobbies but I brought back the change!" He said sweety and Lucifer had cute aggression at that moment as (name) looked at him with so much pride "you know you could have spent all of this right?" He said a little slow, (name) nodding "but that would be rude, I'm spending all your money without care... I don't like that"
Seriously, how did they manage to be fated with the sweetest Omega?!
"He didn't even but himself actual things for himself! He bought things to make us things!" Mammon groaned out but they all knew he equally swooned at the fact their Omega was so sweet.
But also he didn't buy himself anything, Asmodeus has had to bring him to eat and Beelzebub would put food on it.
"Rural Omega culture is different than cities, they're treated more as a commodity" a maid explained to Asmodeus one night as she helped him get ready for bed, she herself being an alpha from the boonies "an inconvenience would be a better word though, everything your saying shows he was treated like how my love got treated, need to make them feel genuinely valued" she went to explain how omegas need regular scenting and assurance to keep mentally regulated and (name) probably never had that.
Which would explain why he seemed like he was constantly waiting for the next shoe to drop despite growing used to them.
Like it was all going to go away.
His dreams were often that, every night he dreamt of waking up in his old room as his sister lived the life she wanted and he was stuck in that musty bedroom where he would rot.
"Your dreams are noisy" Belphegor mumbled as he crawled into bed with (name) and held him close, pumping out pharamones as he thought smugly about the fact he's technically been in bed with (name) before the others. (Name) Snuggled in his chest and physically relaxed, chirping in his sleep as he clung helplessly to him and he was hooked.
He wanted this more and was already annoyed he would have to share with his brothers.
(Name) Let his mates to be plan the wedding though he and Beelzebub thought of food together, the demon horrified at how little foods he got to experience and made him try everything for the wedding and smiled at his happy face with good food "these are mirangue cookies! Like eating plaster that loves you!" He exolained and (name) basically melted at now delicious it was.
Beelzebub was more than happy to share food with him, his alpha wanting the Omega to be well fed to carry his pups after all.
They were all anxious for mating, their bond slowly making them VERY intense about (name) who after weeks, finally sat close to Satan as he read with him though (name) did struggle a bit "omegas being taught to read is laughable, I taught myself as much as I could" he explained and that's when Satan decided he would read for (name), the two spending an hour or two in the library reading together like how Lucifer spent his time teaching (name) new things when he wasn't busy or just dragging him along with things.
(Name) Was always well behaved, he thought of (name)s family and how they were... How did this come out of THAT.
But now, (name) had one worry...
Would he invite his family to his wedding?
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