#i miss my misclickers tails.

[primojade]

𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐂𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄.

𝐀𝐂𝐓 𝐈 : 𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐀 𝐈𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐀 𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐀. ( the die is cast )

𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐈 : 𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐔𝐌 𝐀𝐃 𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐌. ( argument against the man )

" the only impossible journey is the one you never begin. " - tony robins.

𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒' 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘 | As a veteran AR60 player of Genshin Impact, you pride yourself as someone who knows the ins and outs of Teyvat, even studiously completing Spiral Abyss every reset, and having 100% exploration to some, if not all, of the released regions so far. Everything is fun and enjoyable, especially since Sumeru just recently debuted so you still have a lot to do!

All that ends though, when a mysterious passerby pushes you off the building of your university while playing Genshin. But instead of meeting your inevitable end, you find yourself waking up in the very world you were addicted to! 

It's supposed to be a fun dream, right? Something you could laugh at when you wake up? Right?! So, why is that you were back in AR1 with nothing but a dull blade in your inventory?!

…well, at least you still have those 700+ sunsettias and mints, Timmie's fowls…and surprisingly similar game mechanics you used to merely see on the screen before. But what should you do now? Flirt with the Genshin men??? Good lords...

"Welcome to Genshin Impact, Dreamer. Here, we can show you a happier ever after you've never had before…so, ready?"

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘 | In which your utter disappointment with your game progress (or regression) cause you to trigger a new quest? Is this a chance you should take? And Tighnari told you that humans are often more predictable, however, you're an odd one out.

𝐂𝐖 / 𝐓𝐖 | Cursing, hasty confession (but not really?), tighnari is getting suspicious of you, rightfully so lol. Let me know if I missed anything <3

𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒 | I don't know if I should post the route 1 and 2 at the same time but...eh...let me know what u think! Reblogs and comments are appreciated!

masterlist | prologue: that love is a fallacy | (alternate route) route ii: argumentum ad ignorantiam

For your own sake, you logically decided to remain still inside Tighnari's house. Your body was still aching all over, even though the Therianthrope had meticulously treated your wounds well—which you guessed was from your fall with him—it also doesn't leave the fact that you felt even more tired than when you were reviewing for your exams every night.

Well, that would be the first reason. The other is that you were still in shock—and denial—at what the hell is happening right now. Tighnari was real, you could see and touch him in the flesh, and you can't be mistaken that that person isn't him because you know it's him by the amount of shameless staring and gushing you did with his soft-looking ears and tail during his first banner and in his idles.

So, yes…if you were indeed get isekai'd in Genshin Impact, one question still begs to be answered. A lot, to be honest, but for now, you were still not accepting this reality wholeheartedly.

"M…Maybe I just misclicked it or something. That's right, I probably just misread it." You tried reasoning to yourself, a little desperate, before closing the hologram screen. After you take a lungful of breaths, you shakily pat your chest once, and the screen appears before you again.

[Username]

(No Signature)

Adventure Rank: 1

Adventure EXP: 0

World Level: 0

"NOOOOO!!!" You wailed loudly, almost thrashing your feet in the bed as you animatedly heard the cracking ice and booming volcanoes in your head, goading and laughing at your misery. "...my AR60 account, my characters…I grind so hard for them…for two years…"

Almost in tears, you gulped shakily as your eyes travelled down to the Inventory tab, tapping it only to groan in utter disappointment when ALL of your precious weapons were gone! Every. Single. One. Of them! Not even a trusty Prototype Rancour or a Harbinger of Dawn! All of them are gone except for that damn LVL1 Dull Blade!

"I can't believe this…all of my hard work…" You sniffed and stiffly tapped the icon of the Dull Blade, and to your surprise, the weapon suddenly appeared in front of you. "Woahhh—!" Its sharp blade almost grazes your skin. you manage to grab its hilt in time but you almost dropped it when its unexpected weight almost crushed you. "This is so heavy!"

Before you hurt yourself further with the Dull Blade, you immediately unequipped the sword and switched the tab to the Artifacts, and just as you dreadily expect, it was also empty. All your precious five stars artifacts are gone so suddenly. The CD Items, Quest Items, Gadgets, Furnishings and Precious Items tab are as empty as your soul when you were done checking. 

With a shake of your head, you console yourself with the fact that at least some of the Materials (like the local specialties) and Food (sunsettias, starshrooms and apples) were still as high as you remember. 

After some time glaring at your nearly emptied inventory, you closed the tab completely, glossing over the Map in disappointment (which was, by the way, the Teleport Waypoints or Statue of the Seven were still locked, even the ones in Mondstadt and Liyue), and the Quest Menu is still empty. 

As for the other ones, if you remember correctly, the Wish and Shop were unlocked when you reached AR5. While the Character Archive would be available only when you get Amber to be playable—which you think is impossible for now considering you were in Sumeru and Mondstadt is like…a nation away.

This is all so depressing. Add to the fact that you don't know how to return to your world, almost all of your trusted resources, a chance of survival, is gone.

A few moments later, Tighnari arrived with your medicine and he raised his brow when he saw you sulking in the farthest corner of the bed. "What happened to you? Do you feel any pain somewhere?"

You gaze soullessly at him. "My hard work vanished along with my determination to live."

He rolled his eyes. "Okay, drink this medicine and let's get you back to bed." You lamely took the green pill the Therianthrope gave you, toss it on your mouth and immediately gulped the glass of water he offered.

"Blegh!" You almost choked at the bitter taste and Tighnari offered you another glass of water, which you gladly took. 

"I apologise if my concotion is too bitter for your taste. On the bright side, its effectiveness could be trusted." He said in a matter-of-fact tone, though the light twiched of his ears and the swish of his tail tells you that he found your reactions amusing.

"I know, I believe you—uh, what?."

Tighnari was staring at you like you grown two heads. "Hmm. Well, curious how you just swallow that thing without asking me what it was or checking to see if its something dangerous. Even though you appear to know me, you should've been more careful."

It looks like he was about to lecture you about safety and stuff so you immediately replied. "...Dunno, maybe because I don't think you have any reason to poison me after helping and patching me up? Plus, I know your reputation, your talents and your dedication to help. Poisoning me is something against your principles."

"That's true," the Therianthrope looked thoughtful, his green-olive eyes staring down at you intently. "However, humans tend to be a little more cautious about this, you know, which makes them quite predictable. And speaking of which, you appear to know me, but I never have the chance to ask yours. I believe introductions are overdue?"

"Oh, uh…I'm [Name]. Hehehe. Sorry again for all the trouble, Tighnari." You said gratefully. For a moment, you wonder if he would recognised your name. Well, you don't even know if this Tighnari is the same as the Tighnari you were playing before. And even if he was, he probably wouldn't recognised your real name since you were using a Username instead.

Speaking of which…

WHERE IS YOUR PHONE?! AND YOUR BACKPACK? 

Before you could ask what befall your other stuff, Tighnari cut you off. He was looking at you curioisly, never hostile but you could see his guard was up, his tail tensing a little. "...I believe myself to have a decent memory, and I'm confident I never seen you before. How did you know my name?"

How could you tell him he was a video game character you were playing before you die?!

Yeah, no. As if he would believed you. He might've thought you were losing your last braincells and even send you to Bimarstan for real this time.

Quick, [Name], just throw any excuse you could find! Your hippocamus was internally panicking along with you.

"...I KNOW BECAUSE I LOVE YOU—" you blurted out in a frenzy before you realised what you said. Your eyes widened, as shock as him. "I mean, I love your ears and tail! I don't love you as in you, since you're not rea—wait…that will sounds wrong. But not that way—ugh!"

Before you could dug a hole to hide your embarassment, Tighnari's ears perked up as he glance outside the door. At the same time, the hologram of the Paimon Menu suddenly appeared in front of you. A blue exclamation mark marking the Quest tab made you do a double take.

Did you just triggered a World Quest with whatever nonesense you just said?

The Fox and the Jackal

70m

Go with Tighnari to see Cyno.

Quest Chain Rewards: 250 Adventure EXP, 150 Character EXP, 20 Primogems, 5 Adventurer's Experience.

HOLY SHIZNITS—Wait, WHAT? Isn't this going a bit too fast? Why is Cyno suddenly coming here?! Why do you have to go see him, too?

And damn, whoever is the mastermind of all this is tempting you with those delicious rewards—

Route 1.1: Beg Tighnari to let you come to him and see Cyno. After all, you desperately need those primogems rewards to level up your AR. Plus, you were curious what he looks like, too.

Can you even refuse if those primogems are waving hello at you? 

TAGLIST (open! Send a dm or ask to be added :3) | @xinii , @maehemthemisfit , @abvolat , @crazypriestess , @ghostsaysno , @kittence , @unabashedlyminiaturetyrant , @xiyanin , @toasterinabathtub , @sketcheeee , @a-single-pizza , @fuoon , @luvwukong , @salty-salty , @rosebatsc , @inky8 , @thegeekact , @almighty-raiden-shogunate , @isuckat-avery-thing , @perhapsabitgirlypop (if ur username is orange, it means i cant tagged u :(( maybe its in ur settings?)

Route 1.2: Abandon the quest! You have more pressing matters to attend to. After all, who knows if that Quest were as long as that Aranyaka that would make your hair white till you finish it. Plus, you're not a huge Cyno simp and he could tell when you lie, man! A danger! You also need to find your phone and your bag!

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

Friday Night Stabby best quotes part 3 (13/11/20)

Endless: Just gonna put this out there: is it possible Scar killed himself? Tango: I wouldn’t put it past him. Impulse: Judging Scar, he probably could pull that off, yeah. Scar, dead: I personally wouldn’t be surprised either.

...

Endless: Wait, who are we voting for? Brody: We’re voting for the imposters, Endless. You wanna vote for yourself?

...

Scar: So, uh, Endless. Need a rope to get outta that vent? Endless: ...sorry? Scar: You need a rope to get outta that vent you just went into after killing poor Etho? Endless: I-I’m in electrical now. Scar: From the vent? Brody: Is that why Tango voted for you? Tango, dead: I voted for Endless cuz I misclicked. Brody: Whoops! Wait, dead people don’t talk, what are you doing? Endless: ...I SUCK today. I like killing people and venting right in front of everyone, apparently. Tango, dead: That might’ve been the worst round ever, Endless.

...

Brody: Evil, what’s your dog doing over there? Evil: He’s running into the wall. Tango: So far tonight, he’s just been lying on the ground dead cuz Evil’s been dead the whole time. Evil: Uh huh.

...

Skizz: Tango, you were just- You tried so hard to plead your case- Tango: We’re not gonna talk about that round, alright? Skizz: Oh, we are GONNA talk about it.

...

*Brody reports a body* Scar: May I speak first? Brody: Sure. Tango: Please do. Scar: Evil? Evil: Yes sir? Scar: Do you want me to say it, or would you like to say it? Tango: Did he vent?? Evil: Are you gonna accuse me of venting? Scar: I’m not accusing you of venting, I’m accusing you of multiple ventings.

...

Skizz: Feeling pretty bad about Impulse here. His body didn’t even have time to rot. Endless: Oh yeah, I forgot Impulse is playing. Impulse, to his chat: I’m always dead first. It’s Among Us, but I don’t get to play.

...

Brody: Joker, what’d I tell you about being weird? Joker, in a tiny voice: It doesn’t matter.

...

Scar: When I found the body, the vent had just flapped closed. I didn’t see who went in but I know that it was either Tango, Impulse, Mrs Tango… Brody: Really narrowing that one down.

...

*after voting Joker out and seeing he isn’t the imposter* Skizz: Oh no! I’m so sorry, buddy! Joker: Our friendship is dead. I’m dead.

...

Skizz: So Evil’s story didn’t match up. He’s one of the smartest people in the world; he knows where everything is, so when he told us he got lost, I thought no, he doesn’t get lost. Brody: Don’t you give him a big ego.

...

Tango: Scar literally dropped dead in front of my eyes but I didn’t see who it was! Evil: But… Scar’s alive. Endless: Yeah, Scar’s alive. Joker’s dead. Tango: Oh! Then it was Scar. Scar: Wait, what?!

...

Brody: Tango, how many people did you murder this round? Tango: Uh, that’d be zero. Mrs Tango: That’s a lie. Tango: Unless you count Endless. I definitely stabbed Endless. Brody: Well, he’s dead, so… Skizz: Is this you giving up, or…? Tango: Okay no I haven’t killed anyone.

...

Etho: -and I know it’s not Skizz, so that just leaves Mrs Tango. Impulse: Okay, let’s go for it. Mrs Tango: It’s not me. *everyone starts voting for Mrs Tango* Impulse: Wait wait wait wait wait! I voted too soon! I saw her do weapons earlier, it’s not her! I take it back! Tango: WHAT?! That would’ve been a good thing to say earlier!

...

*body is reported* Scar: Brody? Brody: Yes sir? Scar: Is one of those hats Joker’s that you just killed? Brody: N-No? Scar: I saw his body fall and you running away. And there was a little bit of a scent of death. Mrs Tango: That’s just his general scent. Brody: That’s my normal musk. Tango: Brody, do you have any defence other than muskification? Brody: ...no.

...

Joker: You throwing me under the bus, Skizz? Skizz: No, I just know it’s not me. Joker: We’re a team, dude. We’re supposed to kill together. Skizz: Would you shut up?

...

Impulse: Well, Joker just said it was him, so… Scar: Oh, I thought we were doing Endless. Shoot. Endless: WH-WHY?!

...

Scar: That’ll teach you to pull a fast one on me, Joker! The sheriff knows all. Joker, laughing: What? Etho: Don’t mess with the sheriff, Joker!

...

Joker: Hold on, I wanna tell a story. Everyone: *groans simultaneously* Joker: No no, it’s a good story! Brody: Is it about how you killed somebody? Joker: No! I didn’t kill anybody! Damnit! *realises everyone has voted for him* Joker: Well, there goes my story… You’re all gonna be sad you missed out.

...

Skizz: Etho, what’s wrong with your dog? Etho: No, that’s Evil’s dog. Tango: Yeah, Evil’s dog. He just likes to vibrate in the corner. Etho: He’s chasing his tail. Impulse: He’s vibing. Tango: He’s got an eye on his butt, that’s all I know.

...

Impulse: Doesn’t matter. I saw Joker vent so vote him out. Brody: Alright, done. Joker: But- Why can’t it be Impulse that jumped out of the vent? Impulse: Why can’t you not get caught venting thirty seconds into the match? Joker: Oh, I… *realises everyone's voting for him* I regret nothing, honestly.

...

Etho: Why didn’t you go do your task, Joker? Joker: I don’t know where it is. Etho: You went down to something then you pulled away and now I’m super suspicious of you. Joker: No! I-I literally don’t know where- Etho: You had ONE job to do, Joker! ONE job!

...

Joker: *being ejected* I need a hug :(

[pick3mahlord]

So I'll more than likely very much regret this later on, but get ready for a sudden, long-winded and sappy post like I do, because today is a good time for me to reflect, and I like shooting myself in the foot, and as much as I keep thinking I should probably keep the private stuff to myself, I keep going back to look at it and feeling like it needs to be said.

So...Idk, trigger warning, I guess??

One year ago today, I misclicked on a random video of Mark's thinking it was another horror game. It wasn't. And that video was a turning point for me. Not that there weren't any other factors, I don't want to just be some bullshit success story, but without this there wouldn't have been *time* for other factors.

You understand?

One year ago today, I was stuck in a hopelessly deep depression in a relationship that I eventually came afterwards to realize was not only failing miserably, but had also been extremely abusive emotionally.

What family I cared about was already dead. I'd had no friends to speak of, in any capacity, always making it a point in the past for private reasons to keep people at as far a distance as possible. The few times I'd violated that rule never ended well, and I'm still dealing with that.

All I had --all I wanted or needed-- was him, and I devoted myself dearly, and I'm still sorry. But the stress of adulthood gradually began to strain things more and more, and after a minor surgery, he waited until I'd recovered and then let out all the stops. He turned on me.

Bitch. Whore. Useless. Dumbass. Stupid, crazy, heartless. Disappointment. "You should be thankful it was the wall and not you."

The aching grief that followed. Not because I thought I *was* those things on a conscious level, for he never did manage to convince me I deserved it. But because I had hurt him so badly. Haven't I always lived for the happiness of others? I only aim to please. Without that....if I can't do that........

The scars, the random crying fits, the constant nightmares that  might push anyone halfway to the brink by themselves. Ankle-deep in garbage in every room but the kitchen, and that only because I never got up the energy to get out of bed and feed myself. If it wasn't brought to me, I didn't eat. Sometimes not even then.

He saw the scars. I told him I felt suicidal. He told me to do it if I was going to. I tried twice. He never noticed. It never worked.

He began ignoring me, pretending I didn't exist. That he lived alone.

A few weeks after this, in lieu of artwork (which he wouldn't allow), I began to wonder if there were anything else. Some game or hobby or something I could acquire that would at least work to distract me. I remembered my significant other's younger sister talking about FNAF, some horror game that was popular one or two years back. I'd heard about it then. For physical reasons, I'm not actually able to take the stress of playing 90% of what's on the market myself, but this was just a point-and-click game, yeah? It's a diversion. It's worth looking up some videos, at least, to see if I can handle it.

Oh dear GOD was I wrong.

And...you know what happened, don't you?

It wasn't just the game, which by itself was admittedly entrancing enough. It was the commentary. He was an idiot. And amazing. And good-looking, to be fair. And for some reason, I could sit and watch something that would have me sitting clear in the other room if someone were playing it around me. It was oddly safe...

And it became a full-blown drug. And I was staying up to binge-watch things for hours, the one good thing in my day. And I had to get out of bed and force myself to the computer to do it.

Don't get me wrong, that hobby wasn't a cure-all, and it still isn't. There are still days I have to drag my ass out of bed by force. And when I wasn't completely absorbed in the computer screen, things were still pretty bad, and balancing precariously between becoming slightly better and exponentially, unbelievably worse. This was fun, but I mean, it was still....a pastime. It didn't mean anything, it changed nothing. You still *had* nothing, he's waiting for you to die already. And even that would change nothing.

FNAF was done. I needed something else. I started casting about for videos, clicking on random ones. It helped, for the duration.

I started thinking more and more about what I was really *doing* this for in the first place. You've always lived to serve. You still do. No one's gonna come to your funeral, they're dead already. You can't make anyone happy.... That's all we ever wanted..

I began to plan things out, to wonder what I should write for a note. Or, indeed, if there were anything left to say.

I began to cast about for videos. I'd seen some of the others by this time, too, that left me temporarily crying over my keyboard in laughter or that temporarily broke my heart to see. The sad ones stayed with me, and I'd grown to have a substantial amount of respect for this man, Mark, even if he'd never know me. Something to prove there was still one good person in the world. Something was nagging me, the feeling of an idea you can't quite remember....

And at about 3:15am on September 18th of last year, I sat finishing the last available FNAF video (for the 3rd time, I think?) and in the intervening emptiness, for lack of anything better, chose whichever thumbnail I thought was pretty. It suited the mood. Hopefully it was another horror game. It wasn't.

The Static Speaks My Name. 

Suicide.

Throughout that entire 15 minute video, I watched him put himself through fragments, metaphors, the game resonated in some way I'd rather it didn't. I was almost happy it only confused him. It's fairly artsy and only half makes any sense, but seeing the sheer pointlessness of it might have made things slightly worse, or at best neutral afterwards. At least it was good to see him break like that, that he seemed to understand. He had a bit of *my* heart, even if he didn't know it for what it was.

And then he began to speak.

And what he said shook me. It stuck with me, every word. His expression. The open honesty in his eyes. Over time, I had come to rely very heavily on Mark and his videos and his stupid posts as the one good thing that I had. I was alone, but I would drown my nothing in stories, jokes, stupidities. Kindness. That smile. From then on, whenever the thought of suicide would enter my mind, which was quite often, it was immediately followed by Mark's face. And on the tail end of that, those words.

"Just know that if you're a member of this community, if this message is reaching you in any way, just know that I *do* care. And even if I can't care all *that* much, because I don't know you -- I still care."

"Just know that there's a big ol' community of people out here that would love to give you any sort of love, and let you know that you're not alone."

It hurt a lot over the next few days. I'd go back and watch it over and over. I've always needed a purpose, and I was told my fiancee would be happy if I were to die. I don't have any reason to be here. The entire time leading up to that point had been me backing closer and closer to the ledge, always waiting, hoping for someone to stop me, and they weren't doing it. And out of nowhere, the one person left that I had come to have such respect for put himself through the same hell I was stuck in and, unbidden, offered a bit of his own heart in return.

This doesn't really apply to me. People are terrifying. I don't work well with others. I'm not a "member of this community." I wouldn't know where to begin.

But I want to be...

I won't go into much more detail than this. I've rambled enough, as anyone who's ever spoken to me can attest. It made me question. And it made me reach, albeit weakly, and try to find people, and those people made me choose. And some of those were only brief, and some I still talk to now, but in a hundred years of saying it, I could never express how thankful I am that they put up with all my shit, or how much I truly adore them, whether we still speak or not. Having that focus gave me something to stand on, and having that support changed everything. My happiness lies in others, and in loving them, and seeing it reflected back upon me, I may learn to love myself.

I'm not with my ex anymore, by the way. If you couldn't have guessed. He ignored me for Christmas, and made excuses for my birthday, and left me to celebrate New Year's alone. With you guys. We parted ways shortly afterwards. He cried because he'd miss me. *I* cried too, because he'd miss me. But I've had more than one opportunity to have that back, and each time I've refused, because every time I'm asked, I'm reminded that the scars running down the length of my arm are still visible, and I don't deserve that.

I can be a good person, regardless. Family is not always blood. I'm smiling more these days, and laughing more easily than I have in a long time. I'm a harried college student now, something I never expected of myself even when I was a kid, let alone the sad sack of bones that barely had the energy to eat when I was starving. I *am* going to graduate, and I *am* going to claw my way out of this if I have to, because I *want* to. And it's been a very long time since I've wanted *anything.*

Please keep going.

-Pick