#i miss my friends i hate my life i need my license why did i waste so much time so many years on so much nothingness

[groupwest]

went on instagram for five minutes and i hate my life so much 👍 awesome

[th4tprettylittleliar]

pairing: Uni Professor Leon Kennedy x Fem!student reader

CW! : Leon’s cheating ;( , age gap (18 and mid 30s) , degrading themes, reader is a dummy, semi-public sex, (not really) fingering, piv sex, unprotected sex use protection! Reader looses virginity, readers lowkey obsessed , leon fingers her w/ wedding ring (sorry) , Leon’s rude as hell, some religious themes??

A/N : please lmk if there’s any spelling errors! I was really excited to publish this so I proofread fast. Please share this! It’s my first one shot on this blog . EDIT: I proofread now so lmk if there’s still spelling errors or grammatical errors

Okay, fine. Maybe your mother was right. Beauty doesn’t get you that far in life. How were you supposed to know?! For half your life, all you had to do was smile big and everything was handed to you.

Your friends— your popularity.. your boyfriends! You kind of figured everyone just liked your dumb-blonde personality. Not only that but you were just as sweet as a sugar cookie; something someone could crave and desire.. and cherish when it was in their grasp. Sweet and a little dumb? You had everyone at you feet.

Many wished they were you. You were the full package. Except, you were missing just one thing..

Your fucking brain.

It’s not like you were a clutz.. dear god no you weren’t helpless! You just needed extra help. Your daddy always told you that you were a special girl. Your frontal lobe just hasn’t developed yet! That’s why you almost flunked freshman year, that’s why you still use the “L” method to distinguish your left and right, and that’s why it took you nearly 6 retakes of the drivers ed test to finally get your license.

Yet, nobody trusts you enough to give you the keys to their car.

You hated it but you knew it was the price for your beauty. You can’t be that perfect in a world of monstrosity. But yet, even with just your face alone (and maybe a rather rich father) you still got into a good university.

You were so excited when you stepped foot on that campus, you would finally be living out your Rory Gilmore dreams! You were majoring in psychology, and biochemistry. You knew you had to try hard, harder than ever.

Your future depended on whether or not you completed college, and you weren’t going to mess this one up! You were determined. You wanted to live your rich-dentist fantasy with 2 boys. You needed to try your hardest.

Even if your hardest wasn’t enough.

It had almost been a month at university and you already had your eyes locked on someone in particular.

He was so soo dreamy, almost too dreamy. He made you forget that you were here to study, to be a rich mother of two!

You sometimes had to slap yourself to bring yourself back to reality. (Yes, you unconsciously did it in public) you’d get a weird stare or two but you didn’t really mind anymore.

His deep voice echoed against the lecture halls, he sounded stern— mean almost. You absolutely loved it. You loved every minute of that 3 hour lecture period. You thought you’d be bored out of your mind but your brain moved the little thoughts you had left and replaced them with the images of him.

You knew you weren’t the only one who had a infatuation strong liking towards the man.

You heard his name echo all through out that school, the gossip traveled. Every single girl who had a lecture with him either loved him or will eventually love him, it made you jealous.

You’ve never felt like you had to compete for something like this before,

It was always given to you on a golden platter.

It’s not like you could have him anyways. He was your professor. Shocker! You always went for the harder to get ones, figured your looks would do the rest.

Months of just looking down at him from the theatre seats were excruciating. You needed to be right beside him. For the past 4 months that’s all you wanted. You didn’t need to purposely flunk any test because that was already going to happen.

You just wished there was a moment where you could have him all to yourself. That’s all you wanted, a little one on one.

You could’ve easily emailed him and asked for tutoring sessions but why should you? It just doesn’t make sense why he hasn’t offered you any help. Your grades were a mess.

You started to get unmotivated, all you did was analyze him, and hyperfocus on every single one of his attributes. Its the hardest you’ve ever focused on something in your life. Just to go home and fantasize about everything he could do to you. That’s was probably why your grades were a mess.

You decided to pull yourself together and stop. Your dad was threatening to pull you from university calling it, “a waste of money.” So you knew you had to get your act straight.

It was hard, very hard but you stopped obsessing over him. You didn’t want to give up on your own dreams so you went to tutoring groups with your classmates to help get your grade up. That’s where. you met a guy named Miguel that helped you a lot.

You guys usually studied after class, or on the weekends with a cup of complementary coffee always purchased by him. It was a nice distraction from everything. You even managed to start passing the class before the progress report! Your daddy would be proud.

It was like this for weeks. Just the two of you studying for any upcoming tests, or even finishing an assignment together. It was really nice. You were even starting to get really comfortable with him aswell.

Today was another day of that long psychology class. Your usually giggle session with Miguel was some what masked by Professor Kennedy’s talking. You guys were barely taking note of what he’s was teaching.

His same, deep voice echoing through out the lecture hall. Except, every time Miguel and you started to talk amongst yourself, Professor Kennedy went quiet until you guys stopped, embarrassing you both.

You looked up every once and awhile from your computer, pretending to focus on his lesson, just to turn and talk to Miguel again. Professor Kennedy grew annoyed, and paused his lesson.

“Is their something more important up there then what I’m teaching?”

His voice was laced with his grim expression, making your heart drop. Hes never even addressed you like this.

“Excuse me?” Your soft voice ecoed against the loud silence. By the looks of it, your response pissed Mr. Kennedy off.

“Is that the issue? You cant here me? Why don’t you sit down here, sweetheart.” Professor Kennedy looked up at you, meaning buisness. A pout forming on your lips as you picked up your bag. Miguel looked just as shocked as you did while you walked awkwardly down the theatre steps. Plopping yourself in the center of the front row, like he asked.

His arms met the table before you, giving him leverage to lean down. His annoyed voice loud enough for only you to hear,

“How dumb are you? If you wanted to help yourself, you’d pay attention to my lecture. Instead, your giggling up there hoping to clutz your way into his pants, huh? For God’s sake, don’t be stupid and a slut.”

Shock was the only emotion desplayed on your face. Mouth dropped, eyes widening. He smiled before apologizing to the class before continuing his lecture.

Now, it’s a known fact you aren’t the brightest star in the universe, but this was a new low. You didn’t care what he said at all, it just made your stomach fluttery. You knew it’s probably wasn’t okay or even allowed for him to say that.

Not saying being called a slut didn’t hurt your pride, but it just made you fantasize him in a newer light. If slutty was being a little slower and wearing sundresses so be it. You thought you got over this obsession, you thought it was over.

The rest of the class you spent with your mind in a daze and your thighs clenched together. Nobody has made you feel this way. You felt hot, really hot. Tingly too.

If it was any other person, you would’ve let your father handle it. But no, it was Professer Kennedy. Quite frankly, you’d bend over backwards for that man

Class ended, you slowly packed up your things before putting on your school bag. You grabbed your watered down latte in sync as you took a step down the lecture theatre stairs, before hearing your name echo in the now quiet classroom.

“Yes, Professor Kennedy?” Your voice softer than usual as you slowly walked to his desk, your caked face tilting in the process.

“Look, I have my daughters dance recital in a hour and if I’m late my wife is going to beat my ass. So, I’m going to make this quick.” No.. did you here that wrong? he didn’t say wife.. Hopefully he didn’t notice the frown that formed on your face.

“I’ve noticed you’ve got your grades to passing and that’s fine but your barely passing. Your grades aren’t fantastic. I need you to focus on me in my class, not the man sitting next to you. I want you sitting front and center in my lectures going forward.” His tone harsh, how you liked it. This was a blessing from God, putting you right in the path of Leon’s view.

“I thinks it’s best if I sit next to Miguel, he actually helps me out a whole bunch. You should’ve came to me when I was actually failing, Professor Kennedy.” Dumb or not you knew what you were doing. Your sweet smile dawning on your glossed lips, your hands clasped together. He didn’t like that, at all.

“If you wanted to get your grades up, you would’ve came to me. Its university, doll. Do you need your professor following behind you asking if you submitted you assignment?” This is what you loved, the way you were talked to by him made your heart flutter. It was weird, you’ve never felt this way.

“Well, it would’ve helped.” You shrugged, a little giggle escaping your lips but you were met with dead silence and a cold stare. So you stopped.

“Wednesdays, Fridays, and occasionally Saturdays you’ll meet me in here at 6:00 to 8:00 for personal lectures. Dont tell anyone, you’re lucky I’m wasting my time on you. Your grades reflect my teaching so this is mandatory.” His tone monotone and uninterested, you had a bright smile on your face, though. Much more time with Professor Kennedy? This was a dream come true. Sadly, you’d have to end your study sessions with Miguel..

“Thank you so so sooo much Professor! I’ll be sure to come in tomorrow.” Genuine happiness was displayed on your pretty face. Professor Kennedy rolls his eyes before grabbing his briefcase and exiting the lecture haul

“Don’t be late.”

And you did just that.

It wasn’t really your fault… you needed to look good for you tutoring lesson! You wanted to wear this yellow sundress with white ruffles but you couldn’t find it. You looked for almost half an hour just for it to be on your bed.. too bad! Your makeup wasn’t working out either so you needed to restart. Then the car wouldn’t start and… well you get the point.

You also needed your latte so you were about an hour late. You showed up to the empty lecture room, no denying that you looked really good. You just couldn’t find Professor Kennedy.

Suddenly, his office door opens up and your met with an angered man, peering into your soul like he’s about to take it.

“I am so sorry look-“

“Save the bullshit. Your late but you have a fucking Starbucks coffee in your hand?” Proffesor’s voice is echoing off the walls, you gulp before responding

“Coffee helps me focus! I can get you one next time.” Your sweet smile stretched across your face again, trying to lighten the eerie mood.

“No, I don’t want your gratitude. You look like you stepped out of a paegent. Get in here.” He degrades before stepping into his enclosed office. This was the first time his words actually upset you, did you do to much? You thought you looked pretty..

You slowly crept into his office, looking around. It was bare, but it looked comfy ish. He had a nice fuzzy blanket in the corner chair. His desk was front and center with a wooden chair in front of it. Maybe you were looking for a little too long..

“Are you just going to stare at the chair or are you going to sit in it?” His usually demeaning words, he made you feel more stupid than you already did.

“Sorry.” You mumble, siting in the chair before you, your eyes look directly at his, eyelashes batting in his face. Almost felt like a brag.

“Your staying until 9 know since you decided it was okay to be late.” he bowed his head in disappointment as he typed on his computer for what felt like hours.

“Get your text book out and turn to page 132” he demanded, and you did exactly that. The first time in forever you’re accurately following instructions

You stay quiet and still while he types away, your textbook wide open and your phone next to it. Sometimes you found yourself basking in his features. His dyed blonde hair, his piercing blue eyes, his lips, his muscles… god his muscles.

“You’re staring.” Professor Kennedy breaks the silence as you flinch, turning to look at other rather boring things in his room. You could’ve sworn you saw him smile a little.

He actually wasn’t a bad teacher. He guided you through the text book chapters, and adjusted to your learning pace. He knew it would take a while for you to grasp onto the concept of psychology, but for the first time in a while he was willing to wait.

These study sessions helped a whole bunch, somehow with a brain capacity like yours you were actually learning some new concepts. You were finally able to say that you’ve learned something here. Your grades went up to high B’s and periodically low A’s which was a stretch from the beginning of the year. Just a little more studying and.. what?

You failed the chapter 7 test. Now, from the normal point of view you’d be confused, baffled even. How did you bomb a test when you were doing amazing in the class course? But in your point of view, you needed this, this had to be done.

You purposely flunked that test without a care in the world.

Why? Because you’ve noticed he became more distant the more you began to grasp onto psycology, the more you understood it. The tutoring sessions went from four days a week to only once or twice a week for an hour. That wasn’t enough time at all. He even gave you the opportunity to sit next to Miguel again but you didn’t. Why? Because you needed to be front and center. The first thing he sees when he looks around. You wanted to be the only thing on his mind and it’s not fair that he’s not getting the hint.

Why is this happening to you? You were always front and center, the first thought on everyone’s mind. You were practically a god at getting the male gaze and he didn’t bat and eye at you. Is it his wife? He already expressed the discontent in the relationship to his colleagues on the phone. He must’ve thought you weren’t listening.

This isn’t fair at all.

But at least he emailed you last night, you smiled so wide when his notiftication popped up on your phone, and even wider at what he wrote.

Sunday 6:30pm lecture room. Don’t be late. Professor Leon Scott Kennedy

You honestly didn’t think he’d care, and he probably noticed something was fishy because of the ratio from your test to your average grade. It was nearly impossible but you didn’t care, at all. You needed an excuse to see him and that plan fell right into your lap.

you eagerly waited for Sunday to come, it was only two days away but you didn’t have his class for the rest of the week. It felt like it’s been weeks since you’ve last seen him.

Sunday finally rolled around, and of course you had to doll yourself up. That signature sweet smile plasted on your full face, the dress that barely covered your ass. You’ve also grasped the concept of turning others on. Something that came natural to you but you wanted to crank the knob a little.

Your sandals clapped against the wood flooring as you approached his office door, before knocking on the door (knock, knock knock, knock). You were so excited that you instead brought ice cream today.

Leon reluctantly opens the door, to be met with you all dolled up, batting your stupidity long eyelashes in his face, and a ice cream cone in hand.

“Sit down, now.” This was different, or it felt different. Your heart actually dropped. Usually his tone made butterflies appear in your stomach, but he sounded genuinely pissed off.

“Yes sir.” Your words barely audible as you sat in the familiar wooden chair. You dress impossibly bunching up more, you take a light lick of your ice cream cone, as you watch him walk around to his side of the desk.

Leon would’ve usually sat in front of you, but no. He stood instead. His muscular arms on full display to you. He bunched up his sleeves but you were a mess already for this man. Your eyes couldn’t peer away from the veins that were prominently on display in his biceps. Only his voice could’ve broken you out of that trance like state.

“What the fuck is your problem.”

“Huh?” You look up in utter confusion, taking another lick of your icecream, a little dripping on to the side of your lip. His tongue pokes his cheek as he looks up at his office ceiling. Oh, he’s mad. Really mad.

“I tried so hard to be patient with you. So hard to give your dumb ass a chance. You were genuinely impressing me, growing on me even. Just for you to throw it all away.” His face inched closer to yours, you swallowed nothing out of pure fear. Professor Kennedy could practically hear your heart beating

“Professor Kennedy-“

“Oh, don’t you fucking call me that!” His voice impossibly louder than ever causing your eyes to widen and you to jult up in your seat. He decides to sit now and leans back, just for his eyes to narrow at you. He’s never looked better.

“Don’t act like I don’t know this game your playing. Prancing up in here with those stupid ass dresses, always something on your face, and seriously? Practically deep throating that ice cream cone in front of me? You’re not niave as you think you are.” His words shock you, you just liked looking pretty for him was that such a big deal?

“I don’t know what your saying.” You whisper, your doe eyes only growing bigger as you stick your tongue out, taking another drag of the ice cream.

“If you wanted to fuck your professor, you should’ve just asked. You look pathetic” Ouch. Now that one hurt, pathetic? You don’t even recall ever being called that.

“I don’t want to fuck you—“

“Oh, sure you do sweetheart. You’re telling me if I offered, you wouldn’t agree?” He caught you, he did. This was embarrassing being put on spot like this. Pouting as you look away from him. He’s mocking you, and your not going to fall for it.

“Sir, I’m not a slut. Plus, you have a wife.” You reminded him like he somehow forgot. He scoffed as he sat in his chair, looking at you face to face you.

“Come here” he demanded, his demeanor not faltering as your eyes widen, and your body stiffens up.

“Excuse me?”

“Do you have a hearing problem? I said come here.” You did just that, slowly standing up in confusion as you walk to the side of him

His computer was ahead of him, he pulled up a different tab before spreading his legs before him,

“Sit.”

You heard that wrong, you must’ve. He didn’t— He pat his thigh, his glare looking meaner every second as you finally speak up.

“I- I can’t.. Your my teacher and—“

“Am I asking you to take off my pants and suck? No, I said sit.” You reluctantly sit on his lap, awkwardly as you looked at the laptop before you.

“Yeah, you see that? That’s your score. A fucking fifty-four. Do you know how badly that’s going to affect your average for my class?” This felt too degrading, you were somewhat disappointed in yourself.

“Why did you fail my test on purpose?” Its over, he hates you. He fucking hates you more than he already did.

“I- I didn’t.” You stutter through your lie as he spanks you thigh, causing you to jult forward as his hands come in contact with your hips.

“Fine! You started seeing me less.. I just wanted to see you more, and I knew If I passed the test that the tutoring would stop.” You’ve never felt so ashamed before, he shakes his head in disbelief as you fiddle with your fingers nervously

“How sad, you flunked your test for extra time with your professor..” He mocked, grabbing a hold of the back of you neck, causing you to yelp as his lips met the shell of your ear

“You’re going to get what you wanted, baby. But, your retaking this test as well.” And with that he grabbed a hold of your hips, forcing you to face him on his lap as your hands met his shoulders, startled.

“Wait— I can’t this is morally wrong. You have a wife..”

“You didn’t care when you bent over with those short ass skirts, you didn’t care when you ‘accidently’ brushed my leg with your foot.. don’t try to sell me that bullshit now.”

It was all too much, never in a million years would you have thought this would happen. You’re sitting on top of your wish, and it’s getting harder beneath you.

“What if we get caught?” You mumbled, eyes faltering away from his in shame.

“Don’t be loud and we won’t” Without warning, his soft pink lips met yours. You were in shock but you finally kissed back. Your eyes closing in the process as your arms wrapped around his neck.

The kiss only got deeper as his hands went from your hips, onto your bare ass. Rubbing it soothingly before spanking it causing you to interrupt the kiss with a whimper against his lips. He forced his lips back onto yours as his tongue begged for an entrance, which you granted.

Your tongues faught for dominance before his would win the battle, taking over you as his hands crept below your dress and only your lower back. You shivered above him as you broke the kiss.

“We can’t do anything else.” You confessed in a daze, the thought of him cheating on someone for you had you feeling too responsible for the outcome. His forehead met yours as he whispered,

“Just a few kisses, I promise.”

Your niave self believed him as your lips met again, before they would finally travel to your neck, subtly biting and kissing causing you to whimper out,

“Just kisses.” You reminded him as he nodded, before sucking on the spot just below your jawline, your hands met his chest as you clawed at his suits vest. He finally decided to grab a hold of your hips before placing your back against his chest, your sandals propped on his knees as the laptop faced you now, and the image of your spread legs.

Your dress now settled on your hips, showing your frilly white panties that are drenched in your arousal, causing you to grow embarrassed and try to remove yourself off of him. This annoyed him as his much bigger hands forced you back down on his lap.

“You promised just kisses!” You whined out as he snickered below you, before whispering,

“Yeah, my fingers wanna give your cute little pussy some kisses too.” This startled you as his hands crept below your panties, forcing them to the side of your lip as he rubbed your clit, causing your legs to grow weak as he picked up the pace.

“These are not kisses!” You whine out, a moan following shortly behind you. The office door was still wide open, if anyone walked into the lecture theater they’d smell the aroma of sex, and they most definely hear your sweet little noises.

He finally scooted his chair closer to the laptop, before speaking up “Begin, sweetheart. Go ahead and take your test.” You shook your head defiantly, you couldn��t even think straight and he wants you to take a fucking thirty question test right now?

“I can’t—hmph!!” You stumble out, before letting out the most pornstar like moan. He forced his fingers inside of you, the same fingers his wedding band sat on. It hurt, a lot. He smiled as he saw little streaks of blood on his fingers

“A slutty virgin, I never thought I’d see this sight.” He chuckled as your head flung bag, earning a tsk from him.

“Nu -uh, doll. You have a test to take. We can do this all night.” His fingers slipped inside you like a symphony, your gummy walls trying to squeeze him out as he forced his way through

His hand crawled from your hip to his laptop as he prest ‘begin test’ the test was on a time limit, 45 minutes. There was no way you were finishing at all. Your eyes met the screen as your fingers clawed into his biceps, trying to slow down his relentless pace.

The pain was far long gone and your brain was mush. You weren’t going to be able to even think properly so why was he making you take the test now?

“Section one, vocabulary. Sleep and mediation are examples of what?” His tone far more happier than ever, he’s never acted like this in your near 5 months of knowing eachother.

He’s starting off easy and you couldn’t even open your mouth, your ears were ringing, fuck you were so close. “Professor Kenn- hmphh!!” That’s it, he found the spot you never knew existed. The spot that made your legs spasm uncontrollably and you pussy pulsate. You were so close you could feel it

“Right there! Oh.. Professor Kennedy!”

“Shhh, baby, you don’t want an audience, or do you? Answer the question.” He demanded, looking at the beautiful sight before him, 18 year old hottie pratically loosing the few brain cells she had stored up in her head, going dumb on his fingers. He wondered how you’d react on his dick next.

“I can’t- I.. I feel weird..” You confessed, it’s never felt this way before. Sure, you’ve touched yourself a handful of times, even to him. But you’ve never came from penetration, the feeling is so much more different and harsh. Your stomach had this forever feeling of it sinking, and your extremities just felt hot, and stuffed up.

“I’m- I’m gonna cum!” Your eyes began to roll back and within a second of hearing that, he pulled his fingers out and that beautiful feeling left your body, and your soul. “No.. no no! Professor Kennedy why-“ he stuffed your talkative mouth full of his fingers, you felt his wedding band on your tongue, making you mouth taste metallic like.

“I don’t want my baby cumming until she answers the questions, does she get that?” He’s speaking to you like he has to break down the simplest of words. Technically, in your state of mind he did.

All you did was nod as your tongue swirled on his fingers, before your teeth came in contact with his wedding band as you open your mouth, your teeth removing the wedding band as you place it on the table. He practically moans beneath you as he grabs a hold of you thighs

“You so dirty, baby.” He places you on your back, right beside his computer before bunching up your dress. You whined beneath him as your hands struggle to reach his chest, just wanting to feel on him. So much for just a few kisses. He had you right where he wanted you.

“You gonna take you first dick like a good girl, huh? I bet you are.” His words felt like drugs coursing through your body, making you clench around nothing as he practically ripped your panties off.

“Mhm, I promise.” You’re saying that now, until he unbuckles his trousers and pulls down his boxers that make you rethink your very decision. God, it was big, too big. His tip was irritated, looked bruised almost. With vigorous precum spilling from it as he pumped his dick, warming it up.

“I’ll take it slow since it’s your first time, sweetheart.” Is this a joke? You were struggling taking his fingers. There’s no way he thinks that’s going to fit.

He shifts his laptop to face your face, you turn your head sideways to look at the laptop as you whine. You shouldn’t be doing school work while getting fucked for the first time.

He slapped his tip into your exposed clit, earning a flinch from you.

“Please- sir..” you just loved that name didn’t you. “I have to teach you some patience as well, don’t I?” He snickered as he slowly attempted to slide himself it, you were squeezing from the pain causing him to grunt in response.

“Relax baby, you’re going to love it. Fuck… just relax.” His eyes were slowing shutting as his dick slid into you, with a struggle before he finally bottomed you out.

“No- no. Its to big I can’t take it.” You whined out as you struggled against him, his hands met the back of your knees as he pushed them against your chest, creating a easier and way deeper angle

“Oh- oh god!” You cried out as he began to thrust into your warm cunt, his chest heaved against yours as he fucked himself relentlessly into you, only picking up the pace.

It definitely hurt, but that pain would soon shift into probably the best pleasure you’ve ever got to experience. Not even your pink bullet vibrator could bring you to this euphoria.

“God! God! D— sir I can’t .. I nmphhh!!!” You practically screamed as the desk creaked below you, your test long forgotten about as he kissed your neck, trailing up to your ear as you whisper

“How many time did you dream about this—shit.. how many times— Jesus Christ.. did you touch yourself to me, baby? We both know you did, ohh… fuck..” He would periodically break out into a groan and his pace only quickened, your mind was in another dimension, all you could feel was your pussy being filled and pulsating, and your stomach filled with butterflies.

You were long gone, you ears doing much more than ringing, “going stupid on my cock, huh? Pretty girl probably can’t tell what I’m saying can’t she.” And all you could do was shake your head and moan like a bitch in heat.

“God you look so beautiful, getting fucked dumb next to my wedding ring. How slutty can you get?” His pace was quickening almost sending you over the edge, his tip hitting your crevix as you cried out hoping something could answer your prayer of pleasure and allow you to cum.

Leon grabbed his ring, putting it on his finger as he rubbed your starved clit with it, using it as a stimuli. Before shifting his hips to hit that perfect spot within you, that spot that makes your vision splotchy and you legs shake.

“God- Daddy I’m gonna cum! Please don’t stop! Please please please!” His pace only quickened as the rope in your stomach snapped, causing you to practically scream, which was hushed by his hand as you came on his cock.

“That’s a new name. What happened to professor, baby?” You can’t talk anymore, there’s tears building up in your eyes from the overstimulation and he seems to be getting impossibly faster. The room was filled with his balls slapping against your ass, and the squelch your wet pussy makes every time his tip hits your gummy spot.

“I didn’t tell you that you could cum, but it’s your first time so I know you can’t handle it.” He mocked as he picked you up, sitting you on his lap. You fell like a ragdoll onto him, your head on his shoulder, your arms wrapping around back as he grabbed your ass and used his legs as leverage to bonce you on his cock.

Just this action alone made you spasm uncontrollably and cry out, your cunt vibrating against him had even him seeing stars as he quicken his pace. His office chair squeaking below him, his phone buzzing couldn’t be heard over his heavy breathing and your cries

“Fuck- baby where do you want my cum.” He asked, fucking into you like a sex machine, cranking up his speed by ten as he abused your pussy.

“Inside! Nghhh I’m gonna cum again!”

“You wanna get stuffed full of my cum? Have it leak out of you pretty girl? Say it” his words alone could send you over the edge, and they did

“I need it so bad- fuck daddy I’m cumming!!” The overstimulation was too much, everything was too much. You practically saw the gates to heaven as you squirted on him, this action alone made his dick twitch as he came inside you, his hips spasming causing him to thrust inside you as him came, he gripped onto you for dear life before the orgasm washed over the both of you.

“‘M sorry, ‘m so sorry.. I didn’t mean to.” You practically slurred out of exhaustion. All he could do was breathlessly laugh.

“Don’t apologize sweetheart, it was adorable.”

You sat there, in utter silence just in the embrace of one another. His hand met your hair, combing through it as he kissed your forehead. Your head lied on his shoulder, feeling his cum drip from you onto his cock. This was the softest he ever acted towards you.

“You said just a few kisses.” You mumbled tiredly, looking up at him as he laughed to himself.

“That was just a few kisses, sweetheart.” He said as he pulled out, causing you to whine from the sudden loss and a whine to escape your lips.

“You still never answered the question, baby.” He mumbled against your forehead, as you both sat still, recovering from the bliss you two shared.

“Oh, shush.”

[heartss4matthewq]

NOTHING TURNS TO SOMETHING (pt.1)

Summary: You’ve known chris your whole life. When he gets a girlfriend you are happy for him, right?

Warnings: fluff, dom!chris, fem!reader,

—————————

CHRIS POV

7:00 PM

“matt hurry the fuck up we gotta pick up mya” i said.

mya is my girlfriend. we recently got together and our 6 month is coming up so i decided to take her out for dinner. We’ve been arguing a little more recently. I thought this would be a nice gesture.

“yo why don’t you shut the fuck up and get your drivers license then maybe you could pick her up yourself!” matt yells

“bro can you guys stop arguing, matt you do need to hurry up though chris doesn’t wanna be late” nick says

“wait mya’s calling me hold on” i said answering her call.

📞

“hey”

“hey, what’s up?”

“soo i kinda cant make it tonight..”

“what? why?” i said clearly upset

“well you know zack right? my best friend?”

“yeahhh…?”

“well he’s coming over cause’ like he called me and asked if i was busy but i kinda told him no and i missed him because we haven’t seen eachother since like….october so yeah sorry”

i heard her start..laughing? was she already with him?

“uh that’s fine i guess, i just thought we could have a night to ourselves”

“yeah well sorry but goodnight, bye chris.” she hung up on me.

📞

well what the fuck.

—————————

Y/N POV

8:08 PM

i was about to fall asleep when i got a text from chris

i’ve always said i was happy for chris and mya but was i?

i have had a crush on chris since i was little.

i know it’s bad and i truly am happy he found someone but, why couldn’t it be me?

8:30 PM

“bro lowkey mya’s a bitch don’t mind her” matt says to chris

“yeah exactly i mean i’m not tryna dawg on her but why would she do that if she knew you wanted to do this tonight??” i said sounding annoyed.

“yeah i don’t know guys i’ll just talk to her tomorrow morning, i mean she hasn’t seen him for a while.” chris wants to make the situation sound better.

“yeah you fucking better” nick says emerging from his room.

a couple hours pass and we had just been playing games and laughing until…

—————————

CHRIS POV

“guys myas calling!!” i said laughing a little.

📞

“i think we should talk” my face immediately drops

“uh about what??”

“we need to break up.”

“what?” i said clearing my throat

“i said we should break up.” she says firmer than before

“why, i thought we were okay?”

“well we aren’t, plus zach doesn’t like you so..” she trails off

“so that’s it? we’re done like that?”

“i mean yeah, that’s what i said.”

silence.

“also i’ve been sleeping with zach for 3 months”

“what?” i said angry and upset

“yeah, love ya, peace out chrissy”

📞

—————————

Y/N POV

everyone has fallen asleep by this point except me and chris.

we all tried comforting him but nothing seemed to work.

“it’s okay chris, it isn’t your fault she’s a self centered bitch” i said wiping his cheeks.

“yeah but what if i wasn’t giving her what she wanted. and she said she was sleeping with zach for 3 months” he said through sobs

“she did FUCKING what??”

“yeah, i know. what if i’m bad at sex and she just hates me because i couldnt give her what she wanted”

“chris i’m sure you’re good at sex and she’s just talking out of her ass, i bet zach can’t even make her cum” i said laughing

“yeah, maybe”

an awkward silence fills the room

“can i show you that i’m good at sex?”

———————————————————————

[emerald-dragonflame]

Art Style/AU Challenge PT 2: My Hero Academia's Style

Part 1 and Explanation here

I understand now why people hate lineart... thin lines suuuuuck. I don't think I captured the MHA style all that well, and I'm not entirely sure what exactly it's missing, but I hope it's still somewhat recognizable. Also, the names of the Flying Serpent Crew is subject to change in some AUs if I feel it works better with the story I'm telling (I'll put their real names in parenthesis so it's less confusing)

Backstory:

buckle up, this might be a bit wordy, but I tried to make it as brief as possible

Lady Drake: The Dragon Fire Hero

Quirk: Dragon

She has the ability to fly, breath fire, and have super strength, along with the ability to be resistant to fire

Taiba was born in Nigeria and immigrated to America when she was less than a year old with her parents and 3 other siblings. She's very cut off from her native country, and is the only one of her 3 companions that adores her adopted country. Making it a little difficult for her to really connect Bruce (Brosmýr's name in this AU), and Victerico, since their both also immigrants.

She had always wanted to be a pro hero, especially after her quirk appeared. In this AU, I headcannon that America in MHA, the way that you become a pro hero is either by 1. simply passing a test, like for driving or a GED, or 2. going to collage specifically for it, and Taiba went to college. This is were she meets Bruce Ficsher, her future partner and husband.

They both start their own independent company after college, of which I don't have a name for, yet.

Nightingale: The Feathered Lighting Hero

Quirk: Harpy

He can fly, is crazy fast, can control lightning, and can mimic voices and sounds, but only if he's heard them before

Bruce Ficsher was born and raised in Ireland for most of his childhood, but when his father got a job in the states, they moved there when he was a teenager. Due to this, he's still a little bit bitter at his father for forcing him to leave his friends and family to go to a country he barely cares for.

He's pretty down for the 2nd amendment tho.

When he was born, he... very much looked like a baby bird, bulging tired eyes, chicken wings, and all. He did eventually grow out some down feathers, but it didn't really help the teasing from his classmates. That is, of course, until he got a lot bigger than them. He was always referred to as a bit creepy, and being a bit of a loner didn't help.

Bruce wanted to be a hero mostly because of that. He wanted to show that even if he wasn't the most appealing looking hero, he could still do good. That he wasn't condemned to being a villain. That all he ever wanted to do was help those in need.

He was fine just simply talking the Hero's Test and shadowing under a Pro until he could get his full license, but his parents had other plans. So they sent him to college, where he met Taiba.

During their college days, they butted heads a lot. However, forced proximity made them need to start to work together (their powers worked very well together), and they learned that they were a very good team.

They started dating their first year together, and got married before they even finished college.

Captain Serpent: The Water Snake Hero

Quirk: Water Serpent

He has the ability to breath under water, use hydrokinesis, and glide in the air. He, however, can't fly

Victerico left his native country of Spain and when he was in his mid twenties. He is the eldest of the three, being in his early 40s, and is the one that was the most down on his luck.

You see, Viterico came to America on the hope that he could start a new life for himself. A better job, maybe find a wife, and start a family. However, bad break, after terrible luck, after bad timing led to him being homeless and jobless. And would have rather die than live like that, so he became a villain.

Due to his quirk making him look like a sea monster, Victerico decided to hang out in rivers and swamps, lying in wait for people to scare. When he did, they would either run, and hopefully drop something valuable, or he would threaten them until they gave him something valuable. It was awful, but it worked.

After a couple of years of doing this, he was captured by Taiba and Bruce, however, this would turn out to be his big break. For you see, Viterico was the only witness to a murder that had been perpetrated by an infamous serial killer.

He helped Lady Drake (Taiba) and Nightingale (Bruce) finally catch (and sadly kill) the villain, and in turn, the two of them heard his story. They rescued him from prison, on the condition that he become the third member of their agency. Viterico accepted, and after taking the test, and shadowing under the two of them, he became the latest member of the (name pending) Agency.

Main Story:

This is getting long, so I will try to make this brief; their agency ends up in Japan after the appearance of All for One, coming to try and help by their own volition. I imagine that they would want to try and help the students of UA. And with Bruce being a huge language nerd (seriously, if he wasn't gonna be a hero, he would've been a linguist), they were able to get along just fine in Japan. Coming into the main story of MHA after the Provisional Hero License Arc, trying their best to be both protectors of the UA students, and help with the expanding crime after All Might looses his power.

Single Portraits under cut ↓

[00katrinka00]

Landcaster Legacy Gen 7 Update #57

Dear Diary, I'm glad Lacy is back, my mom set up a therapy appointment for her today. I think it will be good for her to talk to someone. Meanwhile, I have a shift at the boba shop that I'm not looking forward to, but afterwards Sage and I have a date so that'll be fun. -Violet

"Alright, Lacy, why don't you start by telling me a bit about yourself," began Dr. James. "What do you care?" "I care, because I want to help you work through all the hard feelings you have right now. In order to do that I need to know a bit about you first." "This is bullshit."

"Please, how would you know what's going to help me?" "I am a licensed therapist," Dr. James reminded her. "My life is so complicated, you wouldn't know what to do with it," Lacy rolled her eyes. "I did get a degree in 'it's complicated'" Dr. James joked. "So, try me?"

"Violet," called Tiffany, her manager. "I want to introduce you to someone. This is Claudia." "H-hi," Claudia said. "She's a bit shy, but since Owen is off to college, I've hired her to be his replacement. I need you to train her today." "Do I get paid more for training?"

"I mean can you even believe that she just runs away in the middle of the night. It was so irresponsible of her," Violet ranted. "Ummm," Claudia was at a loss for words. "She was gone for a week, a WEEK, and we didn't hear anything. My mom got the police involved."

"So, um, how do I use the boba machine?" Claudia quietly asked. She wanted to get Violet back on track. "You aren't going to tell me how annoying I'm being? Or insult me for being self-centered and only talking about myself." "No?" "Owen would," Violet sighed.

"You want me to insult you?" "No, I hate Owen," Violet told Claudia. "He was so unbelievably annoying." "I'm confused, can we just go back to you teaching me how to make the drinks?" "Like he ALWAYS acted like he was better than me, oh my watcher I can't stand him."

"Honestly, him graduating and going off to college was great for me, because now I don't have to deal with him anymore." "It sounds like you miss him." "I do not!" Violet snapped. "Not at all." "But you keep talking about him." "I do not." "Okay, um, so how do I make the drinks?"

Lacy sighed, if she had to be here for the next hour why not participate. "I guess it started with my mother. She wanted me to be just like her. The expectations that she put on me were just too much. I felt suffocated living with her." "And what about your father?"

"He just went along with whatever my mother did," Lacy explained. "I don't even think they really loved each other; it seemed like marriage was more transactional for them. Have kids, carry on the legacy. They never listed to what I wanted." "I'm glad you told me all of this."

As Lacy continued to talk with Dr. James, Violet headed to the pier, after her shift ended, for her date with Sage. "Guess what!" Sage exclaimed. "What?" "I got accepted to Britechester!" "Y-you did? I didn't know you were thinking about college."

"Well yeah, I want to be a music critic, and the first step to that is studying art history at Britechester," Sage explained. "I even got into the distinguished program." "I kind of thought we'd make music together, in Del Sol Valley, at least after you ditched Janie."

"I thought we'd start our own band," Violet admitted. "Oh," Sage muttered. "Look, you're an amazing musician, you don't need me. The main reason I even joined Janie's band was because I was new and wanted to make friends. I'm not as passionate about performing as you are."

"But what about us, after graduation?" "We can still date," Sage assured her. "I mean look at your brother and Nat, they aren't letting distance ruin their relationship." "You're right." "We can visit each other on weekends, it'll be fun. Like a little vacation every week."

Both girls stood up and Sage took Violet's hands. "I promise, we'll make it work. I like you too much for us to break up." Sage kissed Violet's hands. "That's a relief," Violet laughed. "Here I thought we were on the verge of becoming just friends." "Never."

[cptsdjourney143]

What happened to you?

TW: trauma, self-harm, abuse

The sound of rustling notebook paper. The off-white tinge and contrasting lines. The thinness of the sheet between my pinched pointer finger and thumb. The scratching of the pencil point. These are just some of the things I miss about writing.

I have defined myself as a writer for as long as I can remember. It is one of my go-to words when I am asked to describe myself. And no matter how long I goo without writing a word it will always be true. I am a writer. But I think my past trauma and relying on pen and paper to process has impacted my relationship with writing. I have spent so much time pushing down everything I went through… pretending everything was okay over and over again. Now bringing it back up feels impossible.

I have recently returned to therapy and have started seeing a psychiatrist again. I am so tired of anxiety and depression. I am so tired of hating myself. I am tired of the shame and guilt and hyper vigilance. I am tired of being broken. I am constantly haunted by the question: What is wrong with me?

I have been trying to answer that question for 19 years, more or less. I have spent more than half of my life trying to figure out why I am the way I am.

On the outside I look fine. Successful, even. My mom and dad were high school sweethearts. I have supportive family members and friends. I have a wonderful husband and we have built an adorable little family of dogs and cats and horses. I got good grades in high school and continued my academic excellence through college and graduate school. I passed my speech pathology licensing exams with flying colors. I got work right out of school and have established a good career.

Write me down on paper and I seem like perfection. So that is what I have always tried to emulate. If I looked perfect on the outside no one would know how broken I was on them inside. I thrust myself into activities and hobbies just so that I could excel at them for as long as I can remember. In middle school it was Girl Scouts and Horseback Riding. In High School it was music, theater, art, track, and writing. I consistently made honor roll. I made National Honors society. But you don’t need my resume. I did everything I could to be the best at everything I did.

I have worked so hard on being perfect that I shoved down the negative. I have shoved it so far down that I don’t remember a lot of it. The harsh reality is that even through I tried to bury the negative, my body remembers. My body remembers fear and pain. My body keeps holding on to what my brain is trying to forget.

Being perfect on the outside is not helping the pain on the inside anymore. So I went back to therapy and back to hunting for answers to the question: What is wrong with me? I thought the neuropsychological evaluation I took in graduate school would give me some answers. Their testing confirmed my anxiety and depression diagnosis. It confirmed I have fantastic language skills, but my working memory and executive function are “below average.” It talks about my distress and dissatisfaction with my life, lack of coping skills, avoiding new one challenging situations, and so much more. It says in clear black ink that I restrict my emotions and have difficulty with relationships.

“It appears Caitlyn finds many of her relationships to be confusing or complicated. Results indicate that Caitlyn has conflicting feelings about her family, finding them to be supportive and loving… yet also invalidating and unhelpful when she needs them.”

That girl is not perfect. But she is also me. That neuropsychological was from 2015. That was 8 years ago, and I am still looking for answers. I have been looking for answers longer than that.

I have talked to my therapist and psychologist yet about the possibility of ADHD. A lot of my symptoms seem to align: Attention and memory issues, executive dysfunction, motivation paralysis… This constant need to be doing something productive but unable to do anything so spiraling in my mind instead. My mental health team agrees that ADHD is a possibility, but I have not started on any ADHD medication at this time.

In therapy we started to approach my grief. I have experienced a lot of loss in some very traumatic ways. My first memory of loss is my Bubby. I was so young when she died and I felt the loss greatly. I remember watching her get sick and then fade away. My next memories involve my grandma having a stroke and moving in with us. The grandma that used to make us eggs-in-a-basket and always smiled was gone. She was a ghost of her former self. My uncle moved in to help with her care. We watched her fade away as well… and then she was gone and my Uncle moved away. I don’t know why he left, just that him and my dad had some sort of argument and that was the end of it.

For a while there weren’t any more loses. Then when I was in my 20s they all seemed to come at once. My cousin overdosed and passed away, leaving behind two children. Not too long after that my dad passed away. Losing my father has been one of the hardest things I have ever faced, but my mom was an absolute wreck. I had to put on my brave face for her. I was perfect, after all. My grandfather passed a few years after. My mom had just started to be herself again and then she lost her father. Her brother died by suicide not long after… she was the one who found his body. Just a few days ago my Uncle passed away. I am dealing with his loss now. Which is part of why I am writing now.

So yes, I have experienced my fair share of grief and loss. I thought I had been dealing with my grief, but after all these feelings with my uncle passing, I am not so sure.

My therapist asked if I felt like I have come to terms with my grief and I said I had. So she mentioned that there had to be a reason I felt so much hate for myself. She asked if anyone ever made me feel like I wasn’t enough. But I had parents that loved me. I was a good student. I was supposed to be perfect. But I still had anxiety and depression. I was still broken. She said she was glad to be on my journey with me and asked me what I was looking for from therapy.

Once again I had been so good at looking perfect on the outside that the brokenness inside was shoved so far down that I was able to hide it from myself and my therapist. But she could see there was work to be done.

So I started looking harder… thinking about why I went back to therapy and what I wanted from it. I started looking back at old notebooks and journals and videos. I found entries as far back as 2004 talking about my anxiety and depression.

Anxiety and depression did not seem like enough of an answer to what was wrong with me. ADHD didn’t seem to be the right diagnosis either. Nothing I did seemed to be helping.

I don’t entirely remember how, but some how I came across looking at Complex PTSD online, but that didn’t make sense either. I didn’t survive a natural disaster or torture. I wasn’t in a war. I wasn’t abused. Yeah, I had been through some hard stuff, but nothing compared to that.

But the symptoms… the symptoms were like looking at all my deepest shames in bold black ink.

- Difficulty with emotions

- Distrust in the world

- Constant feelings of emptiness or hopelessness

- Feeling damaged or worthless

- Feeling different from others

- Difficulty with relationships

- Dissociative symptoms

- Headaches, dizziness, chest pains, and stomach aches

- Regular suicidal feelings

I have experience all of these things. I thought they were all just my anxiety and depression… maybe they are. I really don’t know. But I didn’t have flashbacks to anything that that was a major component of PTSD. Then I read about emotional flashbacks: intense emotions that seems to come from no where. I feel like I live in this state. Constant fight or flight. Constant anxiety. Constant spiraling. Constant emotional flashbacks. But emotional flashbacks to what?

So I kept doing research… in to myself and in to CPTSD. And I continues to see myself in each blog post, video, article, research paper, and book. I started to read the book “What Happened to You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing.” By Bruce D Perry and Oprah Winfrey. They wanted me to shift my perspective from “What’s Wrong with You?” To “What Happened to You?” Sure, I was used to reframing my thinking. Years of therapy have taught me that it is often necessary.

So what happened to me? When I was only 12 years old I began to self-harm. Looking at pictures of myself at that age now as a 31 year old… I look so young. I look like a baby. I don’t remember why I started cutting myself. There was no event I can remember that caused it… I just got so tired of feeling sad and anxious that I wanted to feel anything else. So I decided to feel pain instead. But this didn’t feel traumatic enough to warrant complex PTSD. Considering it took me 7 pages of lead up to get here… I guess I am carrying some trauma.

My earliest writing mimicked my current thoughts over and over. Not good enough. Not worthy of love. Feeling alone and like no one could ever understand. I self-harmed all through middle school, high school, and college. I had stopped cutting myself by graduate school and have not self-harmed in that capacity since then. I thought that since I had stilled doing it, I was over it.

I lived in constant cycles of anxiety and found relief in cutting and then felt deep guilt and shame and fell in to deep depressions for most of my formative years. Growing up like this changes a persons brain. So far reading about CPTSD has made me really grateful I took neuroscience in grad school. There is a lot of talk about the brain.

What happened to me? I cut myself for many of my childhood years, teenage years, and my young adolescence. Why? I don’t know. I don’t remember. I have spent so long trying to forget. But my body didn’t forget. My body holds all that fear and anxiety and shame and deep seated guilt.

Here is what I do know. My oldest journals and notebooks do not say anything about why I started cutting myself and I may never remember. That has to be okay. There might note be a clear answer. The defining moment part of me longs for. The thing that I can point at say say “That! That is why I am the way that I am.”

I know that somewhere along the line my emotional needs were not met. Which is the definition of emotional neglect. But the very idea of that makes me fiercely defensive. My mom and dad loved me and I had a good childhood. I know my parents had many flaws. They both had anxiety and depression. My dad was an alcoholic. But I have so many memories of them full of love.

I still hid my self-harm from my parents. I don’t know why I felt I could not go to them, except for my need to be perfect on the outside. I don’t know what I feel the need to be perfect. I have no memories of being told I needed to be. I have always put that burden on myself.

I threw away a lot of the journals I kept from ages 12 to 17. Those were my worst years and I was absolutely ashamed of them. I was past that phase and didn’t need them anymore. Ii don’t remember exactly when I threw them away, but I remember that it happened. I wish that I didn’t now. I feel like they may have had some answers.

My diagnosis is probably not the take away here. My therapist says I give my mental illness too much power. It’s hard not to when it has been there since I was 12 years old. I have grown comfortable with new labels. Anxiety, depression, panic disorder, ADHD, CPTSD… whatever it is, I’m working on it.

But I still feel like my “trauma” wasn’t “traumatic” enough. I think that is my need to be perfect, though.

My therapist said she thought I should continue therapy. She said she was happy to continue with me on my journey. I am not sure what I want from this journey, but I figured this would be a good place to start.

[blue-eyed-bloodstains]

When was the last time you wore a Band-Aid and why?

on my hip over a skin tumor cause my pants kept rubbing on it and making it bleed, scab, rinse repeat

Do you like ketchup or mustard better with your corn dogs?

I personally hate corn dogs, but definitely ketchup

A trip to California, the Bahamas, New York, Wisconsin, Utah, or Canada?

Bahamas 

What was the last act of creativity you displayed?

umm journaling I guess?

Do you like the way your hair looks right now?

no

Do you ever find yourself just writing/typing out your feelings?

sometimes

If so, does that make you feel better?

depends...

Whose house were you at last, besides your own?

my friend Bobbie’s house with her fiance Erik

Any big plans for this summer?

not sure yet...too focused on if my fiance will even be fucking here at all for it...

Are you missing school yet?

at this point I kinda do cause it’d be something to do and somewhere to go...then again I’m turning 31 so it’d be awkward as fuck haha

Do you like your teeth?

.....don’t go fucking go there with me.

Are you in a hurry to grow up?

I’m about to be 31...wish I never did.

Who was the last person you were in a vehicle with other than family?

my fiance

Does piano music tend to calm you down?

it’s relaxing but it’s hard to calm me down given several anxiety disorders so...

What’s something you need to get done soon?

paying off DUI fines and get suspension off my license

Is your best friend awake right now?

doubt it

Are any of your friends or family members out of town right now?

ha yep...the fuck else is new...

If I came to your house, could I find any kind of chocolate?

unfortunately no, I’m dying for some so bad right now so bring it!

What size bed do you have?

queen

What is the last thing you charged?

phone

Who was the last person to upload a picture with you in it?

umm..probably my stepmom from my 30th bday last year

Have you ever held a snake?

yeah even owned a few

Do you like peas?

LOOOOOVEEEEE EMMMMM!

What is the last cd that you listened to in a vehicle?

CD? oh christ I have no clue it’s been years! it’s usually radio of my playlist

Do you ever wear sleep masks when you sleep or shower caps when you shower?

neither

What would you like to drink right now?

ANYTHING ALCOHOLIC AS STRONG AS FUCKING POSSIBLE, HIGHEST PROOF!! :(

When is the last time you ate pudding or yogurt?

it’s been awhile

Would you rather go to a beach, an amusement park, or a water park?

right now water park for pool, rather swim in a pool than beach right now

Don’t tell me lies, so where’s your man?

......New Zealand on a job since February and still there...only been home twice for a week each, and was supposed to this weekend for a week but nope just found out he’s stuck there till the end of the month no visit...

Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex?

many times, I’m a tomboy I’ve always gotten along better with the guys

Has anyone said they love you in the last week?

yeah, fiance and mom

Have you faced any of your fears lately?

no

Have you ever kissed under water?

no unless you count shower ;)

Which friend are you most similar to?

Ally for many reasons...

Your ex calls wanting to hang out. What do you say?

I think we’re finally in a spot, mostly me, where we’d be okay to hang out (cause of me, been there done that before and yeah I fucked up...I wasn’t ready..) but probably wouldn’t be a good idea and wouldn’t happen anyway we’re on opposite sides of the country so

Would you get back with your last ex if they asked you?

no. 

Have you kissed anyone whose name starts with a M?

no

Would you kiss the last person who texted you, on the lips?

umm it’s my mom so I mean the way you do as a parent/child yeah

Camping with a ton of friends or hotel with a few friends?

camping

Do you want someone dead?

no

Do you ever wonder what your ex is up to?

sometimes...can’t help it, try not to though

Could you go the rest of your life without a cigarette?

HELL NO!

Do you have alcohol in your house?

a few of his beers calling my name but I can’t touch em...he’ll lose his shit given I’m supposed to be sober...

Have you ever wanted something you couldn’t have?

yep

Are any of your friends virgins?

not that I’m aware of?

What’s annoying you?

a lot

How is your boyfriend/girlfriend doing and where are they now?

fiance and not good, in New Zealand on a job...

Do you have anything to pay off?

fines from DUI and suspension fee on license as well as renewal for license since it expires on my bday in a few days anyway so...

What are you wearing right now?

black shirt, black hoodie, jeans, white slip on sneaks

What are you listening to?

All Falls Down by Adelita’s Way

Where did you first hear this song?

years ago

Are you the one that normally makes the first move?

no

Do you drink/smoke?

complicated and yes

[samuel-de-champagne-problems]

Band-Aids Don’t Fix Bullet Holes, But Your Kisses Do

summary:  in a standoff with an unsub, reader makes a choice: her life or spencer’s. 

pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader 

category: angst/fluff at the end 

warnings/includes: canon typical case violence, based off of episode “haunted” so spoilers, guns/gun violence, hospitals, kissing, mentions of hotch’s stabbing 

word count: 3437 

author’s note: i wrote this one a while ago and thought i’d share it. if anyone wants to be tagged, i’m going to figure it out and i’ll add you to a tag list!!  

Band-Aids Don’t Fix Bullet Holes, But Your Kisses Do

The two agents that sat on swivel chairs facing each other fake arguing about an episode of Dr. Who. Spencer had his legs straight out, resting on Y/N’s lap comfortably. She leaned forward and placed her chin on her hand as she explained to Spencer her thoughts on the episode. 

��Spencer, you cannot tell me that you don't think  David Tennant is hot! I watched the episode with you and I can tell you are-" 

“I’m not going to argue against that, Y/N. David Tennant is,” Spencer started as he fiddled with the lollipop that Garcia handed him when he and Y/N walked into the bullpen.

“Is what, Spence?” A teasing look graced her face as Spencer’s blush grew down his exposed neck and collarbone. 

“He’s hot, okay Y/N is that what you want me to say!” Spencer’s voice rose a couple octaves from his admission over his not-so-subtle-crush on The Doctor.

“That’s exactly what I wanted you to say, Spencer. Least I know we have the same type” She said with a wink. 

“You got a type, Y/N?” Derek called from the doorway of the conference room. 

“Yeah, hot doctors with brown hair”  Emily said without missing a beat. She had walked in behind Derek, the pair  of them discussing her annual Sin-to-Win Weekend in Atlantic City. 

“But they, you know, have to be like Time Lords, or whatever” She said in efforts to cover up her growing discomfort. 

She turned her attention back to Reid, who was in the process of trying to remove his leg from her warm lap. He did not want to give Derek anymore ammunition to make sly jokes at his not-so-subtle-crush on his best friend/co-worker. Secretly, he wanted to keep his leg there, against her soft thigh and maybe she’d drop her hands on his leg in a comforting gesture of….friendship. 

Garcia placed a tin decorated with white and orange cats dressed in bonnets on the table just within reach of Hotch’s usual spot near the monitor. Reid reached forward to open the tin, which he deduced was filled with Penelope’s infamous snickerdoodle cookies. Unfortunately, before the genius profiler could reach the gaudy tin, Penelope swatted his hand away from grasping the cookies. 

“Hey! Those are for Hotch” Penelope shouted as she grabbed the tin and moved them closer to Hotch’s chair. 

“What? You know I love cookies, Garcia. Come on, Hotch hates attention” 

“I just made some cookies, it’s not like I made him a cake.” Penelope argued as Derek and Emily both quietly eyed the cookies. 

“Spence, we’ll make cookies tonight. It looks like it’s just a paperwork day” Y/N said with a slight smile, that, in turn, elicited a big grin from an unsuspecting Spencer.

“Anyway,” Derek started as he chose to ignore the interaction that unfolded before him “we all know he’s going to act like nothing happened” he remarked as he fingered through the dozen case files spread out before him on the table. 

“Doesn’t mean we have to,” Penelope said sadly as she looked down at the cat cookie tin.  

“Maybe we should,” Reid said quietly to his co-workers. 

“But, I’m not built like that!” said Penelope. 

“Hotch is though, Penny,” Y/N noted as she snuck a cookie while Penelope’s back was turned. She broke it in half and handed it to Spencer under the table. He winked at her as she shushed him. 

“Yeah, Y/N,” Spencer said with a mouthful of cookie, “Hotch never blinks” he finished with a large swig of lukewarm, sugared coffee. 

“Classic Alpha Male” Spencer said, looking towards Derek. 

“Do you think he stared down Foyet...you know while it happened?” Emily questioned. She was usually the one who could stomach all these, but when it came to the team, she was as nervous as the lot of them. 

“It’s probably what saved his life,” Derek said somberly. 

“He can’t be okay,” Penelope said with a whisper. 

“I wouldn’t be,” Spencer said with an air of uncertainty, “I’m a blinker” 

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There was an uncomfortable silence during the ride to Louisville. Hotch was more sullen than usual, but, thankfully, Garcia broke the tension with her reports via computer screen. 

“Our point in Louisville is Lieutenant Kevin Mitchell, my contacts don’t report any more attacks related to this unsub” JJ relayed. She sat next to Derek, who was across from Hotch and Rossi. Emily sat criss cross on the table across from the foursome. On the small jet couch, Spencer and Y/N played a game of chess as they listened to the initial reports JJ received from the local PD. 

“Call’s proving hard to track. He never had a driver’s license, so he’s probably still on foot,” Spencer mumbled without removing his eyes from the chessboard. 

“Or public transportation,” Y/N added as she cringed when Spencer announced “check”. 

“Well, he’s not going to get anywhere too far with his face all over the news,” Emily continued. 

“So, what do we think the stressor is,” Rossi nodded. 

“He just lost his job. Worked in a factory since 1990. He made appliances forever. Not a single promotion” Garcia’s voice came across a little staticky. 

“That’s a long time to be bitter,” Derek posed. 

“Or he just doesn’t care,” Reid countered. 

“According, to what you sent over Garcia, he kind of seems like a hermit. Far as I can tell he’s got no one. No wife, no children, no parents.” Y/N added with a sad tone in her voice. 

With a sharp tone, Hotch added “then why didn’t he kill himself?” 

“He’s not finished killing yet,” Reid continued the thought, “check mate!” 

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It was at times like these that it seemed like the case drags on forever. Call had kidnapped a little boy, who, Spencer had figured out was Call’s biological son.  The local PD was getting them nowhere. Those overly macho cops seemed to be having a difficult time taking orders from JJ. Y/N watched as she marched over to Mitchell and demanded that he give a press conference. 

Y/N chuckled quietly to herself as she watched the interaction. JJ was a force to be reckoned with, especially when the life of an innocent child was at stake. That cop had no idea who he was challenging. 

“Hey, Y/N,” Spencer called from his spot in front of the whiteboard. It was decorated with a combination of their messy, rushed handwriting. Spencer grasped his blue marker and looked at Y/N with a painful expression. 

“I’m not getting anywhere with this geographical profile,” Spencer’s somber tone flooded Y/N’s emotions with an overwhelming sense to comfort him. 

“Spencer, put the marker down and look at me, please, for a second.” He obliged as he turned to face her.

Y/N reached up on her tiptoes to gently rub her hands along the base of Spencer’s neck. He could feel the tension melt away. Spencer was not one for physical affection, but he realized that he, in fact, craved the soft touches of people he trusted. Whether it was a brotherly pat on the back from Morgan, a playful high five from Garcia, a proud fist bump from Hotch, Spencer had grown to seek out affection. 

“Y/N,” he said. His voice but a whisper in the loud, hectic bullpen. 

“Shh,” She could sooth his worries just with a graze of her hands across his neck. It was magic to a scientist. Her magical presence set him on fire. 

“Hey, we can do this, Spence, all of us, but we need you,” Y/N voice mirrored his own. A hushed whisper that fueled the flames of his love. 

Instead of kissing her forehead or even hugging her, all Spencer could make out was a small thank you, before, like the wind, she was gone to see if Garica had any updates on the missing boy. 

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In a frantic hour, Garcia had discovered a possible location of Tommy and his father, Darrin. Like most the unsubs, they were children of tragedy. Children of abusive homes and of deep rooted violence. It was up to the team, as they raced down the street in their crowded SUVs, to stop the cycle of violence for claiming another innocent child. 

“Hotch, you are on speaker,” Emily called from the passenger seat of the car as Derek sped down the warehouse where they suspected Tommy to be held. 

“Do not go in there without SWAT, do you all here me?” Hotch said sternly. 

“That means you, Derek, don’t go in there till backup gets there,” JJ added from the phone that Emily held. 

“You got it, boss man,” Derek made a sharp turn that led Y/N to nearly fall into Spencer, who sat next to her. 

“Spencer! Where is your vest!?” Y/N asked him impatiently, with a tinge of nervousness and fear laced in her tone. 

“Y/N, Call doesn’t have a gun, he’s been using weapons of opportunity. The profile points to him not even being armed right now. If anything-” 

“Screw the profile, Spencer!” Y/N’s voice was hysterical now. “You need to where a damn vest, you are an FBI agent, if you get-” 

Y/N’s rant to Spencer was stopped short by the disturbing sight before her. From the SUV the four of them could see an even more distraught Call standing out in the middle of the warehouse parking lot. He held Tommy by the neck, with a gun pointed at his temple. Derek stopped the car and jumped out, his gun wielded as he began to try to talk the man down. 

“Call, drop the weapon and release Tommy, right now!” Derek’s voice loomed large and powerful as Emily, Reid, and Y/N each got out of the vehicle and turned their spots with Morgan. 

“You don’t want to hurt Tommy,” Spencer started. “we know who he is to you, we know that he’s your son, and that you weren’t there for him.” He put his gun away in an attempt to show Call that he was not a threat. Y/N could read the desperation in Spencer’s voice from a mile away. Call, like Spencer’s mom lives with schizophrenia. Spencer and Hotch nearly had it out in the middle of the bullpen after Spencer insinuated that Hotch was implying that Call was only going on this murder spree because of his condition.

“Just let the boy go, Call.” Y/N continued the track that Derek and Spencer started. “Just let your son go. We will make sure that you can get medicine, that’s why you went to the pharmacy, right? You need meds to help yourself and then,-” 

Out of the corner of her eye, Y/N could see Spencer inching closer and closer to Tommy. As if it was a chain reaction, Call drew his weapon and fired towards Spencer. Before she even could realize the consequences of her actions, Y/N tackled Spencer to the ground. The bullet lodged itself into the Kevlar vest she wore. Her side burned as she came to understand what had transpired in the last couple of seconds. 

Spencer scrambled onto his knees and clutched Y/N’s cold hands in his. 

“Spence, I’m okay,” Y/N said as she struggled to sit up straight with Spencer practically laying on top of her. 

“No, Y/N! Don’t do that,” Spencer started with tears flooding the corners of his eyes. The little droplets made his sometimes brown and sometimes green eyes sparkle with sadness. 

Spencer moved his hands from the place where the bullet lodged itself in her Kevlar to grasp her face tenderly. But his movement caused her cheek to be painted with a deep red handprint in the shape of the crying man crouching before her hand.

“Spencer,” she let out a small whimper when she saw the look of horror on his face.  Before he could even ask her why she did what she did, Y/N passed out, her limp, cold hand finding its home in the comfort of soft, warm ones. 

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The rest of the case passed in a numbing hum for Spencer. Once Y/N got shot by Call he let go of Tommy and Derek shot him the leg. Spencer did not even stay for when Emily and Derek apprehended the unsub. It was like his legs acted of their own accord when the EMT showed up for Y/N and he walked with them never letting go of her hand. 

The ride to the hospital in the back of the ambulance was hectic. The EMTs had to monitor her heart rate, her blood pressure, and her oxygen. Even the temptation of numbers could not capture Spencer’s attention as he mulled over the possible conclusions to why Y/N would take a bullet for him. There was no logical reason for it. Not one. Spencer let the steady rocking of the ambulance to soothe him as he gently rubbed his thumb over Y/N’s hand. Even though he longed to hold her against himself, this would have to do, for now at least. Till then, Spencer forced his mind to focus on the pattern that her beating heart created.

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Hospitals terrified Spencer. The smell, the sick people, the people who were unsavable. Part of him wonders what his life would be like if he became a medical doctor. As a kid, he had a future where he could do anything he could dream of. Cure schizophrenia on Monday, operate on an inoperable tumor on Tuesday- that’s what his life could have been like. 

But sitting there, in the sterile hospital with the white walls and constant beeping, Spencer’s mind was only thinking of another life he could be out living. In the minutes that he sat with Y/N as she lay in pain in his arm, false memories of a life together painted in his mind. Laughing children, family picnics, couple’s Halloween costumes. He stroked her hair and saw a life so familiar that he could almost taste it. He tasted cookies that they baked together as they danced without a care in the world. He tasted Halloween and Forth of July and all the holidays in between. He tasted butterfly kisses with his children that had her hair and her eyes and her smile. 

He was stripped away from those memories that he didn’t even own. Now all he could taste was the bitterness of regret, the sourness of what if, and the tartness of the nightmares masquerading as reality. 

“Family of Y/L/N,” a surgeon dressed in light blue scrubs walked into the waiting area with an unreadable expression on her face.

JJ and Derek stood up immediately as the doctor went to continue to deliver the news. 

“She’s awake and doing okay,” the doctor said with a relieved expression. 

“Oh that goodness,” JJ said as she hugged Emily in a moment of happiness. 

“She’s a fighter,” Derek quipped, “I’m going to call Garcia, she’s probably a nervous wreck” 

“She’ll make a full recovery, but should avoid air travel because her internal bleeding,” the doctor reported, “also, which one of you is Spencer? Even since she’d been lucid, she’s been asking for you,” she said looking around at the remaining group, with her eyes landing on the man in question. 

“She is?” Spencer questioned carefully. He was worried that maybe she regretted jumping in front of him. 

“Yes, why don’t you come with me. It may make her more comfortable having someone she wants with her” 

Y/N wants him. 

Him. 

Spencer was not sure how he even walked himself down the corridor to where Y/N’s room was located. But sure enough, he was met with her ashen face beaming up at his. 

“Y/N! Oh my goodness, are you okay, I mean, obviously you’re injured so you’re not okay. I don’t mean to invalidate your pain, I just...why, Y/N, why on Earth would you do that?” Spencer finished. His voice was more tender towards the end. He looked down at his friend before him and tried to read the expression that graced her face. 

“Spencer, I did what I had to do. You….you would have died,” Spencer noticed the tears that puddled in her eyes and had to suppress the sudden urge to kiss them away. 

“I’d rather die than live my life in a world without you, Spencer.”

Spencer closed his eyes and sat down on the bed with her. 

“Why?” he asked in a voice that was hardly audible. It can’t be, he thought. Maybe this is just something that a teammate does for another teammate. Comrades in arms or something like that, he thought. Trying to make sense of senselessness. 

“Why do you value my life more than yours? Why-how can you do that” there was not stopping tears in his eyes now. She reached out and held his face, like he held her as she bled out in the warehouse only a couple of hours ago. 

“Spence, my life would be dull and gray without you in it. You’re my best-” She stared as he tensed up at what he knew was coming. She only jumped in front of him because it’s what a teammate does. 

“Please, I can't bear to hear that. I-maybe you only can think of me as a teammate or worse a brother, but part of me. A hopeful and romantic part of me that I can't let go of the thought of you thinking about in a different way,” he was so embarrassed, so raw in the moment that he could not bear to even look her in the eyes. 

“Spencer?” he could only watch the way that their fingers laced together. He focused on the patterns between the itchy hospital blanket. 

“Y/N,” he started and took a deep breath. Spencer had never intended to tell her this. Maybe in moments of drunken bravery he thought about it, but he’d always sober up before his dreams could come to fruition. 

“I’m a logical man, I solve problems for a living but sometimes. Sometimes, I can’t use logic to solve some problems, and there’s no logical reason for you to jump in front of a bullet for me. Unless you love me? And I hope with every fiber of being that you do, because I am so desperately in love with you” 

Spencer allowed himself, for the first in his life, to have once of hope and faith. 

Y/N’s eyes met Spencer’s in an uncharacteristically shy moment. 

“I do, Spence. Of course I love you”

Spencer let out a nervous laugh as he, once again, gently placed his hands on her jaw. He placed a kiss on her forehead. The small, tender affection elicited a whimper from Y/N. Spencer jumped back in horror. 

“Oh, honey did I hurt you? You gotta tell me where it hurts” he murmured in a comforting voice. 

“Hmm, no I’ve just been waiting five years for you to kiss me and you settle on my forehead?” Y/N beamed up at him expectantly. 

“Nowhere do you want me to kiss you, my dear?” Spencer questioned playfully. 

“How about in between everywhere and anywhere you want, Doctor Reid,” Y/N, despite the pain, managed a smile for the man that held her hand so lovingly. 

“How about here?” Spencer leaned forward and kissed the left corner of her mouth. 

“Or here?” The right corner. 

“What about here, I’ve dreamed of kissing you here.” He moved his mouth to meet the place on her neck that met her collarbone. Y/N looked up at Spencer dreamily. One day she might chalk it up to the painkillers flooding through her system, but the pure adoration that melted from Spencer’s lips to her skin was something that never knew she’d crave. 

“And here” 

His lips parted slightly as he moved in to meet hers. The feeling was more divine and earth shattering than when Prometheus gave humans fire. Together, intertwined in bedsheets, IVs, and fingers laced with hair, they lit a fire of their own. Kissing Spencer stopped time. 

It was Y/N who broke first. 

“Spencer,” she said with a new reverence that would only be reserved for him. 

“Yes, sweet girl?” 

“You gotta promise me something,” she said as she raked her hands across his arms, feeling him shudder under her touch. 

“Anything and everything for you” he said, mirroring her earlier words to him. 

“Wear a vest next time”

[mzjmesa]

Out Loud | Chloe Decker

She was a good detective. Is. The pride of the office, the officer praised here and there. Your partner. Your bestfriend. Detective Chloe Decker. It wasn't because of her smart, genius mind that attracted you to her, no. Well, sometimes, anyway. But it could've been alot of reasons, loving Chloe Decker. And you would've loved any other reasons— to make this easier, to make the feelings disappear sooner. Because whatever the attraction was, it was unprofessional— Chloe never did unprofessional. And you fear if you couldn't hold it any longer, she'd run away from you.

You can't bear that.

But you loved Chloe either way. You loved her eyes, her kindness, that bright and knowing smile that goes with her eyes, you loved the way her lips part when she's about to say something defensive— you loved her. You loved her the most when she knocks at your door and asks how you're doing. You loved the late night talks and laughs about freshmen days which was rare, because she never spent so much time in highschool, she got unending stories about it anyway. You loved the way she listens. You loved her. You loved Chloe Decker. And as she passes by your desk, to the man she likes, you reminded yourself that it was wrong. Wrong because you were supposed to be happy for her.

A knock on your desk drifted your thoughts away, Dan. “How are we doing?” he asked, if he'd caught you staring enviously at Chloe and Lucifer, he hadn't mind.

“How are we doing?” You repeated stupidly, still hungover from yesterday. Which by the way was Chloe's fault, you just wouldn't admit it to yourself.

Dan shrugs, “Yeah? I sent you files to look at, remember?”

Oh.

You shake your head as though it would help you focus on the present and tried to remember where you had placed the papers. You checked your drawers, trying hard to block out Chloe and Lucifer's voices. You busied your hand flipping through dozens of papers, vividly remembering the file's name.

Jonathan Flinn's. Ahh. Case closed for 2 months, there wasn't much evidence of the murder, but the majority linked to him, and eventually the court pronounced him guilty. There had been questions left unsolved, and if Espinoza wasn't up to anything, it would've been left at that.

You sighed, “Have you talked to Chloe about this?”

“Yeah,” He looked past your shoulder to where Chloe was, then back to you. “she thinks it's a bad idea.”

Of course she did. You did, too. That was a thing between you two, something about your guts always telling you the same what's what. That's why you were partnered with her, and you would've loved to continue being one (although truth be told, you still were in papers anyway) but she'd found a consultant, a batshit crazy one at that. Lucifer Morningstar. Always telling himself he's the devil, going on and about his everyday life like anyone gives a damn, and always making everything about himself. If he wasn't charming, and a ‘friend’ of Chloe's, you would've hated him. Most times you did. But times when Chloe was down, he was always the first to cheer her up. You used to be the one doing that, until he came.

“You should listen to her, Dan.”

“Oh c'mon! I would've agreed with Chloe and wouldn't have come to you if it weren't so important. His mother is my god—”

“—mother. Yes, yes, I know that, Dan. I know you think this is a good idea to pay her back, too. But it's not, trust me. Trust Chloe.” You exhaled, feeling the weight of her stare on your back. “It could go worst anyway, what when we can't find any evidence or if we do, worst case scenario is it'll only lead to him. Again. We'll just worsen his situation.”

Dan sighed, massaging his jaw with exasperation because he knew you were right. And also because as much as he pretends not to care too much, he does. You loved that about him.

As you heard footsteps behind, you handed back the files to Dan who hid it behind his back, masking his irritation with a smile to Chloe.

You ignored her, lingering your eyes on the missing button of Dan's shirt.

“Ella found some prints, we haven't identified it yet but it's likely our lead.” Chloe started just behind you, and you knew Lucifer was beside her as much as you hated it. “In the meantime, Dan? I'd like to discuss to you about the Flinn case, Lucifer and I went back to the crime scene yesterday. We found nothing.”

Dan frowned. “I thought you said it was a bad idea.”

“I know, I know. I... ugh... well I went over it again, anyway.”

A small smile creeped on his face, and you were almost sure his eyes were watering when Lucifer jumped on the conversation about his father, bla bla bla. You couldn't care less. Chloe did, and that should be enough for Lucifer. She'd always been enough for you. You bit your lips, wishing you could busy your hands with something. Anything. But your desk was on your back, and oh, Chloe, too.

It felt immature and all, but you were hurting just knowing they were together, seeing them would break you.

“I'll check in on with Ella.” Chloe announced, “(Y/N)?”

“Are you having a stroke Miss (L/N)? Staying still like a trained robot, you're scarying me— and believe when I say I rarely get scared.” Lucifer added.

Oh you believe alright. And robots are trained?! Trying to hide your feelings with a forced smile, you turned around, making sure you weren't going to make an eye contact with a certain detective, and immediately grabbed a random paper and pen you can hold— scribbling anything. Anything at all.

“I'm alright.” You answered after a beat or two, still unbothered to look. Who would want to, honestly.

Chloe cleared her throat, whispered something to Lucifer, and then bid goodbye. It was then when you looked at them walking away. Lucifer's hand on her back, Chloe looking small beside him— your chest aching the same, if not, more.

You're definitely not gonna look again.

-

You had a week off work, and you'd almost fell to your knees thanking God when the lieutenant told you. You needed it more than you needed Chloe, which proves just how important it was— Chloe had been. Still is, by the way.

It was 8 am, by now Chloe would be at her desk, examining or making reports, or on a crime scene with Ella and, Lucifer. You snapped out of your mind, reminding yourself you'd needed the vacation because work and particularly Chloe had been stressing you out and very much so hurting you.

You'd hit the beach, go to the mountains for the view,— you didn't wanna hike though, you needed rest not making sweats— visit your sister and niece, and then finally bake while blasting Taylor Swift because admit it or not, you're much broken than your grandmother's vase.

When the water was hot enough, you took a bath and dressed. A peach-colored tank top that comes along with a brown mini skirt and a coat was your outfit for the day. Only, the coat reminded you too much of Chloe's. She liked coats. And that coat, back then warning you that she'd steal it eventually. So you changed with other coats, just didn't fit well with the shirt and skirt, so you gave in and left your hair untouched and untied. Grabbing your pouch and your gun— a licensed one, just in case. And opened your door. You would've preferred the bright sky and fresh air of the morning in LA. But Chloe Decker was standing there, fist on air as if she'd been ready to knock.

You froze.

Were you having a stroke? Most likely.

“(Y/N).”

“Chloe.”

Wasn't she supposed to be at work? You didn't mind either way, but it surprised you still, she hadn't been visiting much since... Lucifer. Everything's just been different since he arrived, not in a good way for you.

You stepped aside, not saying anything since you figured out a human wouldn't understand any word that comes out of your mouth. She went in, instead of sitting on your couch like the old days, she lingered on the living room, standing and looking at you.

Most times you hadn't mind.

She started, “How are you?”

“I'm good.”

“No, (Y/N). How are you?”

You didn't know what to say. Or why she'd ask a question as that. “I'm not—”

“Do you like me?”

What.

Your face must've given the shock, because she answered your unasked question. “Dan said some things. I'm-I'm not— you're not transferring, are you?”

Oh you're definitely gonna choke the life out of Dan. But knowing him, he wouldn't have spit it out too easily. He was probably drunk and didn't mean it. Still, you wished you said it to Chloe yourself. About the liking and transferring.

You remained silent, reading the expression on Chloe's face. Was she sad? Upset? After years of knowing her, you would've known right away. But now you couldn't. And you fear you might've forgotten the every detail of her face, too.

“(Y/N)...” Her voice gave out, carrying every sadness within. “Why didn't you tell me?”

“About what?” You answered stupidly in a whisper, fearing that if you came into your senses everything would feel too real.

“About everything! About— about your feelings for me. About Seatte. About why you've been so far from me!”

“You have been far from me, Chloe.”

She frowns, and you knew millions and billions and gazillions of questions where popping in her mind.

Tears in your eyes were forming, and you hated it, all of this. She wasn't supposed to know at all. She wasn't supposed to know you had immature feelings for her. Wasn't supposed to know you were transferring atleast 'till next month. But Chloe wasn't dumb, and you should've known that.

Chloe swallowed the lump in her throat, her breathing heavy. “We could've talked about it.”

“We haven't talked much at all these days because of—” you cut yourself off, rolling your eyes at how sick it feels. You hated yourself for it, but you continued anyway. “Because of Lucifer.”

She exhaled. “Lucifer and I are complicated.”

“I know that, Chloe.” You said firmly, meeting her gaze pitying you. Of course she pities you. “I also know you like him so much. I know you've been crying when he fake married that Candy. I know you've been sick worrying when he can't answer your texts or calls. I know you've gone lengths trying to understand him. I know. I know so much so that I didn't wanna be so selfish and tell you things you didn't wanna hear because it'll make your complicated relationship with Lucifer even more complicated. I fucking know. And I loved you too much.”

Chloe's tears were beginning to fall, one by one, slowly. And it hurts you to see her like this. Especially because you know you caused it.

“It was never my intention to push you away. You're my friend— can't we just stay like this?” She asked in a soft, breaking voice. And if it wasn't Chloe you would've said yes because people are easy to move on from. But it was indeed Chloe and she was... not like anyone you know. She was a missing piece of your puzzle. Only, you have never been a piece of hers.

“I love you, Chloe.”

It was weird, saying it out loud, to her. You never thought you could, knowing you were a coward than every cowards combined.

You did though, and that must've pulled something. Because Chloe approached you, side hugged, and then left.

So much for a vacation.

You spent the night crying.

Chloe Decker spent hers with the man she loved. And you were never that man.

[backtobackbakubabe]

Speak Easy

Bakugo x Reader , Dabi x Reader

Reader has a siren quirk and has spent the past several years of her life as a captive being experimented on by "heroes" Now that she's out she needs protection and safe place to heal. Who will be the one to put her pieces back together?

Words: 2738

Masterlist

************************************************************************

You tried and failed to lift your head. This should alarm you, but it was something you had unfortunately gotten used to over the past… how long had you been here? You couldn’t even say. Maybe a year, give or take? But it honestly felt like a lifetime. You could hardly remember your life before. Back when you had a life, friends, family, a promising future. Now you were nothing more than property to some secret fucked up government funded hell.

You spent most days in a drugged-out haze. They liked to remind you that it was your own fault. All you had to do was cooperate, now you had to face the consequences of your stubbornness. But those hazy days were by the far the best. Those days it was easy to let the darkness take you and dream about what your life would be like if you hadn’t ended up here. You can still see the soft smile of Todoroki as he helped you study. You could feel the warmth of Kirishima’s hugs. You could hear the quit mumbling of Midoriya as he scribbled in one of his many notebooks. You could smell the most intoxicating mix of smoke and caramel as you and Bakugo trained. You wondered what your friends where up to now. Did they miss you? Did they still think about you?

The other days though… they sucked. They were filled with needles and experiments. Always forcing you to use your quirk on some poor helpless person. Always trying to find a way to use your quirk without your permission.

Compliance was key. Just do what they ask, when they ask, and do it right. Any kind of mistake whether it was intentional or not was seen as insubordination. At first you tried to be sneaky about it, thinking that if anything they would just punish you. But you soon found out that they not only punished you, but the person you were meant to be using your quirk on. It was better for everyone to just submit.

You’ve always hated your quirk. People tended to avoid you, scared of what you had the potential to do. No one understood that just because you had the ability to do something, didn’t mean you were likely to do it. It wasn’t until you got to UA and finally made some friends that you started to appreciate you quirk.

They called you Siren… like the mythical creature. You could control and manipulate people using the five senses. If they looked you in the eyes you could see into their head, and their private thoughts. You could hypnotize them with just your voice. You could paralyze them if they tasted your blood. Your smell…. was quite the aphrodisiac. As for skin to skin contact, it helped you share and feel emotions and sometimes even pain.

None of that mattered if you didn’t activate your quirk though. You could live your life just like everyone else. You didn’t just walk around every day controlling people like puppets. It didn’t stop the fear that festered in the hearts of the public though. Your biggest mistake was deciding you wanted to be a hero. You wanted so badly to prove to everyone that you weren’t the monster they thought you were.

You could have lived your life off the radar. But once you took part in the sports festival there was no chance at that. Civilians complained about how you had a villains quirk, how you shouldn’t be allowed to walk the streets unsupervised, let alone be given a hero license.

So, when there was only one agency willing to give you a job after graduation you jumped on it. They told you, they planned to utilize you in most recon and interrogation missions. Which made perfect sense given your skill set. They were going to train you to be the perfect spy.

At first it was normal for you to be gone for weeks or months at a time, with no contact with your friends. They understood you had top secret stuff to handle and always looked forward to hearing your stories when you got back. But the longer you worked there, the sketchier the missions got. Tracking bad guys turned into tailing fellow heroes. Interrogating criminals turned into “persuading” politicians. The last straw though… they had asked you to start sleeping with targets. The ultimate honey pot.

You started to be more vocal about your disapproval. You should have known better.

Now this is your life. Strapped to a bed, drugged up, and used as they pleased. You almost always had on a blindfold and gag. Except for when you had to “work” you lived your life in darkness, you lived your life in silence, you lived your life in solitude.

Your neck itched and bled under your collar. The humiliating thing was what kept you under their control. It acted as a shock collar, a tracking device, and it also monitored and recorded all of your vitals. They have to keep you alive after all.

You heard the familiar buzz of the electric lock on your door, signaling that someone was about to walk in. You felt anxiety bubble up inside you. Just remember the rules. Just behave and you’ll be fine.

You could hear quick quiet footsteps step into the room and your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. After all the time you’ve spent here you had gotten really good at telling everyone apart by the sounds of their footsteps.

“Shit, what did they do to you?”

You felt tears well up and your hands began to shake. You’d know that voice anywhere, even if it sounded strained and emotional. It was Bakugo.

Warm hands pulled your blindfold off, quickly followed by your gag. Your hands jerked in their restraints as you tried to reach for him.

“Hey, its okay we’re here now. But you need to calm down. Your heart beats all over the place. They’ll know something’s up.” His hand smoothed your dirty hair out of your face. You could see the pain and disgust painted on his face.

You wanted to say something. To thank him. Anything. But you were in shock. You were also terrified this was a trick. What if they were testing you? So, you just stared at him with glossy eyes as he continued to free you.

He made quick work of the rest of your restraints, leaving only the heinous collar. He gave you a sympathetic look. “This is going to hurt, and I’m really sorry about that. But I have to get it off before we leave.” He cupped your cheeks in his hands, “Are you ready?”

Without breaking eyes contact you nodded silently. This was the first time someone has willingly made eye contact with you in months. You could almost drown in his vermillion eyes.

His hands moved from your cheeks to the collar on your neck, “One… Two…” Without waiting for three, as impatient as ever, he set off several small explosions that busted the bulky metal collar to pieces, but not without burning a thick ring around your neck.

You winced in pain, but you still made no sound. It was like there was still some part of you that was scared to break the rules. To speak without permission. Before you could even start to think about how messed up you were, Bakugo was scooping you up. He sprinted through the door and was racing down the halls. You wondered why there were no alarms going off. This seemed to easy. This had to be a trap, or maybe a dream. You felt yourself start to shake in his arms.

One of his hands wound through your hair. “Hey it’s okay. We’re almost out. The others are waiting for us. I just need you to keep your shit together for a little while longer okay.”

Before you knew it, he was kicking a door down and all the sudden you were outside. You gasped as you felt the cold rain hit your skin. You blinked in surprise at how bright it was, despite the fact that the sun was hardly even up yet.

A van screeched to a halt in front of you and the door slid open just in time for Bakugo to jump in. “WE’RE GOOD! GET US OUT OF HERE!”

The door slammed shut and the Van lurched forward.

You were now sitting in Bakugo’s lap clinging to his shirt as silent tears slid down your cheeks. You could hear the voices of Todoroki and Kirishima coming from the front of the van, but you couldn’t understand what they were saying. You just clung tighter to Bakugo and continued to sob.

“I don’t know. She hasn’t said a word since I found her. I think she’s in shock.” His fingers tangled in your hair while the other hand rubbed circles on your back.

At some point you must have cried yourself to sleep. When you woke up you were in clean clothes, curled up on a soft couch.

You could hear voices coming from somewhere behind you.

“I know I don’t like it either, but we don’t really have any other options. We have no idea who’s on what side. Outside of the people here right now, who can we honestly say we trust enough to protect her?” You had never heard Midoriya sounds so rough and defeated. “She’s in no condition to look after herself and we can’t help. Not right now.”

You could hear pacing behind the couch, “You weren’t there. You didn’t see what they were doing to her. It was…. Sick a-and twisted. I say we take them down and ask questions later.” Bakugo only stuttered when he felt helpless, which wasn’t often.

“Bakugo you know we can’t do that. They may borderline evil, but officially on paper they are heroes. It’s a hero agency after all. If we attack that makes us villains, best case vigilantes. Both of which result in us ending up in Tartarus.”

“Okay and? You’re trying to hand her over to villains anyway!” You kept your eyes closed as Bakugo leaned over and pulled a blanket over you.

“I don’t know if I would consider my brother a villain. At least not anymore.” Todoroki sounded tired. “Ever since we… reunited… we’ve had a don’t ask don’t tell policy. But I keep tabs anyway. He’s still shady, but he’s not working with villains anymore. If anything, we have more in common now than before. He’s my brother but he’s also a dick. He doesn’t really care about heroes and villains anymore. He just doesn’t like people in general.”

You stiffened. Were they talking about Dabi? Why would they trust him? Wasn’t he one of the villains that kidnapped Bakugo?

“You say he doesn’t like people, so why do think he’ll even help?” Bakugo was making his way around to sit on the end of the couch, gently moving your feet into his lap. He seemed to calm down once his hand found your calf.

It was quite for a while before Todoroki sighed, “Because unlike the rest of you… my brother and I know what it feels like to be an experiment. He won’t let anything happen to her. Villain or hero, he doesn’t care. He has no rules or code of ethics to follow. He’s our best option here Bakugo and you know it.”

You couldn’t take this anymore. All these guys sitting around deciding your future as if you weren’t sitting right here.

You slowly sat up, pulling your legs away from Bakugo. You blinked as you looked around the small room. Todoroki and Midoriya were sitting as a large wooden table that was littered with files and paper.

You blushed when you realized everyone was looking at you now, yet the silence persisted. Were they waiting on you to say something? You cleared your throat and winced at how dry it was. “Oi! Get her some fucking water, would you?”

You nodded your head in thanks as Midoriya handed you a bottle of water before taking a seat on the floor in front of you. “Listen y/n. None of us can even begin to try and understand what you’ve been through the past few years. It might be a while before you are ready and that’s okay. But when you are, please know we are here to listen and help in any way we can. Any information you can give us on what happened, what they are doing there, will be helpful in making sure we take them down.”

You nodded as your grip tightened on the water bottle. They wanted information. But what information could you possibly have that could be helpful. You spent almost the entire time drugged, blind, and chained to a bed. Your heart began the thud against your chest at the memories.

Bakugo was quick to scoot over. He didn’t touch you, but he wanted you to know he was there. “Hey it’s okay. Like he said. No one’s asking you to say anything right now.”

Todoroki grabbed something off of the table in front of him before strolling over to hand it to you. “Here. I noticed you are having some difficulty speaking. Given what you’ve been through it’s not really a surprise. So, you can use this to get your thoughts out. Whether they be private or not. It might be good to just get things off of your chest.”

Again, you nodded as you took the leather-bound notebook from Todoroki. You flipped to the first page and traced the empty lines with you hand. You opened your mouth to say thank you but were shocked to find that you couldn’t make yourself do it. You hadn’t been allowed to speak in the labs. Not unless given permission, which was hardly ever.

You glanced around to the other men, gesturing with you hand that you needed something to write with. Of course, Midoriya, Mr. Takes notes on everything had several pencils in his pocket.

You wrote the following:

Thank you. For everything. I didn’t think anyone was coming for me. I don’t know why I can’t speak, but it’s probably because of the rules.

Bakugo read over your shoulder as you attempted to show the other two men. “Rules? What rules?”

You sighed and gripped your pencil tighter to the point of almost breaking.

I will not look anyone in the eyes without permission.

I will not speak unless spoken to.

I will not touch anything, or anyone without consent.

I will do as I am told without resistance.

I will remember this is the consequence of my actions.

You turned the notebook so they could see and you could feel the tension rising in the room. You almost jumped out of your skin when Todoroki’s phone chimed.

He quickly walked away to answer it, giving Midoriya a nervous look as he did.

You turned to look at the angry man sitting next to you. His eyebrows furrowed and his fists were clinched. Finally, his eyes left the notebook and met yours. “Hey I just… I just want you to know I’m sorry.” You gave him a confused look, but he pushed on not waiting for you to question him. “I’m sorry it took me so long to realize something was wrong. I’m sorry I couldn’t find you sooner…I- fuck- I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

You went to put your hand on his shoulder but paused right before you made contact. He growled as he gripped you hand and put it on his shoulder for you. “You aren’t there anymore y/n. There’s no more rules.” His fingers found your chin as he guided you to look at him. Your eyes widened and you gulped. “I don’t know how much of that conversation you heard earlier. But I promise I’m not going to let anything happen to you. I’ll check in with you as often as I can. If Todoroki says we can trust him… then I guess we’ll just have to trust Todoroki.”

You tried your best to give him a reassuring smile, but in all honesty it felt more like a grimace.

Todoroki walked back in shoving his phone in his pocket. “Okay he’s on his way. We have probably about fifteen minutes. Let’s get ready to move.”

[ratmonky]

Noxious Silence

Word Count: 5.5K

Warnings: non-con, hypnotism, somnophilia, alcohol, obsession

AO3 Link

The two of you met when you started as a first-year along with Maki, Panda, and Yuuta.

You instantly became friends with each and every one of them but Inumaki remained as a stranger. Although you liked him more than a friend should and wanted to be close to him, he acted cold towards you for a reason you never managed to understand until one day when you all became seniors.

A simple rule of the dorms, two of the seniors buy the necessities for everyone once they all run out.

It was a rule older than you. This wouldn’t be the first time you had lost at rock paper scissors against Maki and were tasked with the duty but it was the first time you were paired up with Inumaki.

Unlike any other times you went out to buy the necessities, your trip to the large store with Inumaki went uneventful.

After the two of you bought everything everyone needed and returned to the dorms, he offered help to you carry your stuff to your room.

Nice gesture, kind and quite unexpected since he usually kept his distance when it came to you.

Nonetheless, it made you blush because your crush had stepped inside your room. Perhaps, you could tell Maki about it after dinner, albeit how much she hated listening to you talk about Inumaki, she kind of enjoyed seeing the way your eyes sparkled as you talked about him.

Finally done putting away the stuff you had bought, you turned around to find Inumaki crouched in front of your laundry basket, with one hand he was holding one of your panties up to his face, his shoulders moved as he inhaled your scent deeply.

Your cheeks flushed and mouth gaped in shock, “Hey-”

“Take off your clothes.”

Limbs turned into stone first. Then your body moved on its own against your will.

He locked your door.

“Get on your knees.”

No matter how confused and scared you felt, you were at his mercy. Even when he unbuckled his belt, you hoped he would abruptly stop and laugh. This had to be a joke, right? But you knew Inumaki wouldn’t go this far for a joke and pull his cock out in front of you.

“Suck it.”

~~~

Days after that day until graduation was hell. If others noticed your change of mood or behavior, they thought of it as the stress of having to get your license to become a professional sorcerer.

Why was he doing this?

Was he doing it to anyone else?

No, you would have noticed if he was. You knew he wasn’t. You hoped he wasn’t.

You couldn’t tell others about anything, even if you wanted to.

“Don’t tell anyone about things we do in your room.”

Thankfully, you never saw him again after graduation and you drowned yourself in work to forget about everything.

At least that was the plan.

~~~

"You’re up early today," Nobara said and took a moment to take a sip from her coffee. “I didn’t think you’d call me this early to help you with the shop.”

“I couldn’t sleep.” You had thought she wouldn’t think much of it. Maybe not. Nobara could easily tell when something was wrong. At least when it came to your well-being.

“Did you pull an all-nighter?” she asked, raising a brow.

You nodded.

But she was smarter than that. She pouted before asking a more specific question, “Were you out working late again?”

Caught in your ‘not really a lie’, you smiled at your friend and gave her an apologizing look. “Yeah.”

“Maybe you should go out and meet new people instead of exorcising curses in the middle of the night,” she suggested and smiled back at you.

“I don’t like going out alone.” Putting away a bouquet of roses, you noticed the time. Your delivery would be here soon.

“Well, you’re going out to exorcise curses all by yourself,” she pointed out and crossed her arms over her chest. “Surely, you can go to a club or a bar to meet new people.” Letting out a sigh, she took another sip from her coffee. “So whaddya say to going to a bar tomorrow?” A large smile tugged at her lips. “Together,” she added but after she didn’t get the reaction she wanted from you, Nobara insisted. “Come ooon! It’ll be fun!”

“Okay! Okay!” you laughed loudly, agreeing to go out with her.

“It’s decided we’re going out tomorrow!” she clapped her hands and then pointed a finger at you, “You have to dress up though, maybe you’ll meet some cute guys there!”

You were about to protest but you knew you needed it. You needed the closure of another person. You desperately needed to socialize with new people and stop working overtime. So you gave in.

“The delivery will be here soon. Can you throw the trash out?” you pointed to the back of your shop.

Nobara left her coffee cup on the counter to walk around the cash register so she could grab and tie the trash bag before dragging it to the back of the shop.

You took her absence as an opportunity to go to the bathroom but as soon as you started got out you heard her yelling for you from the back.

“The delivery truck is at the back!”

You shouted back an ‘I’m coming’ and walked to the back of the shop to greet the delivery man, signing the documents about you receiving the packages.

“Let’s get to work.” you cracked your fingers before lifting two small packages, “We have to put the ones with yellow stickers on top in the storage room.” You pointed at the yellow stickered boxes with your foot. “The rest has to be behind the counter so I can put all of them to the glasshouse and fix them into displays after lunch.”

Your simple explanation was all she needed, she bent down to lift one of the yellow stickered boxes and easily carried the two packages inside.

Wanting to match up with her, you put down the small packages you were holding and instead tried lifting one of the boxes but you could barely lift it up to your ankles. You huffed and tried again.

When Nobara came back to grab another box, she saw you walking over to the other packages that were supposed to go behind the counter, you easily lifted one of them. You stacked three of the boxes on top of each other and walked past Nobara to get inside.

“You’ve got this!” she cheered mockingly and patted your back lightly to avoid making you fall.

You grunted in response, “I can’t even lift the boxes from the ground.” You walked to the front room to do nothing but watch as your friend carried the boxes inside alone.

Once Nobara was finally done carrying all the boxes inside the storage room she glared at you for making her do all the work.

Noticing her glare you winked at her, “You know you love me!”

~~~

You were watching the ceiling, as usual. The television was turned on for distraction from the world itself. you didn’t like how quiet it could get during the night. The television mostly functioned as white noise for you to meditate as you laid in your tiny floor-bed. Not even a futon.

The small apartment didn’t have any furniture other than your so-called bed and a small couch. The television was a present from Nobara’s girlfriend but there was nothing else in the apartment other than the coffee machine in the kitchen.

Although you didn’t have any furniture or a real bed, you didn’t mind it.

Living an absolute minimal life was fine as long as you had a job and friends you treasured, yes, it was fine.

Having only a few friends, you had never shown your weak side to them since there were certain thoughts rather than emotions you could never let out. It was simply for the sake of being safe, your friends didn’t need the negative thought you had within yourself in their lives. You didn’t want to disappoint anyone with your inner thoughts.

Finally managing to stop daydreaming, you got up from your bed to put on a dress before fixing your hair. Everything you had on could be considered too much effort for going to a bar but Nobara had told you to dress up nicely. She always liked you dressing up whenever you went out together, simply for the fun of it.

Unbeknownst to you, it was because she wanted you to take your time doing some self care.

It was going to be fun tonight, at least you hoped so.

~~~

“The food here is greasy,” you commented when Nobara said she wanted to get something to eat as you opened the door for her to walk inside the bar.

“Yeah,” she agreed. “Just like how you like your man.” She laughed at her own joke as you vaguely noticed a familiar group of people and a panda sitting on a table.

“I thought it was going to be just us tonight,” you mumbled, hand going to clutch your bag nervously.

“The more the merrier,” Nobara said, putting a hand on your back to lead you towards the people you went to school with. “Plus, you never come to our reunions. It was the perfect excuse!”

“You came!” Yuuji jumped up from his seat when he noticed you and Nobara walking towards the table he was sitting at. His cheeks tinted pink and his neck red. You could see that he was holding a non-alcoholic beverage.

“Of course, I did,” you replied, putting your bag down before waving at the large group, your eyes landed on Inumaki but you quickly averted your gaze.

Everyone was here, just as Nobara probably planned. Yuuji’s arms wrapped around you tightly, he was mumbling about how much he missed you, and so on. Quickly, he led you to the group, forcing you to sit between him and Megumi.

“You look different!” Yuuji said, turning to Megumi. “Right?”

“It’s been a while since she graduated, of course, she looks different,” Nobara responded and then pointed a finger at you threateningly. “You have to come to the reunions at Maki’s place more often! We always get together to drink and all!”

“You make me do those every week,” Maki scoffed. “Not everyone can keep up with your over-the-top parties.”

Pouting, Nobara turned to Maki with her usual puppy eyes. “I thought you liked my parties.”

“I do,” she paused. “When people show up to them.”

Yuuji laughed and you covered your mouth to stifle yours.

“How ya been?” Yuuji asked, he sounded genuinely curious.

You sighed and your lips curled up into a smile. “Busy. I work under a professional sorcerer even though I have my own license. I do extra work at night alone and do extra work at my flower shop.”

“Sounds tough and way too busy.” He took a sip from his own drink. “I’ve been working with Gojo since graduation so I know how it feels.”

Jokingly, you patted on his back. “I’ll pray for you.”

Inumaki watched the two of you talk with half-lidded eyes, hiding his frown behind his own drink.

“What are you gonna order?” Nobara asked, only then you realized everyone had their own food or drink on the table. Grabbing the menu she was holding out to you, you swiftly glanced at it before deciding to order a cocktail. “I think I’ll just drink tonight, something fruity would be nice.”

“Oh, I’m gonna order a hamburger and a coke.” She got up from her seat and turned to the others to ask if they wanted anything. Nope, she turned around her heels, “I’ll go order for both of us from the bar, the waitress seems busy.”

You followed Nobara’s stare and found yourself looking at the waitress who was scrolling on her phone by the corner.

“Maybe, they don’t serve tables after a certain hour,” you said. The last thing you wanted was Nobara complaining to the owner of the pub.

“She’s right,” Maki agreed.

“Yeah... maybe.” Nobara squinted her eyes at the waitress and walked to the counter on the other side.

“So, anyone special in your life?” Maki asked, smiling behind her drink.

Inumaki put his drink down the table with a little too much force, it made a thud noise, nothing too loud. Nonetheless, it made you jump in your seat.

Stay calm. You would be safe with this many people around.

You shook your head rapidly, “N-no.”

“Really?” Yuuji raised a brow, “I thought you weren’t coming to Kugisaki’s parties because you were with your boyfriend. I heard one in every three women has a boyfriend. Since those two are single you must have someone, right?”

Ah, right… None of the boys knew about those two. There even was a rumor going around about Nobara liking Yuuji. Haha... You caught Maki looking a little uncomfortable but none of you said anything. You didn’t have anything to say anyway.

“She seems uncomfortable,” Megumi informed. “Stop bickering about it.”

Thanks to Megumi’s warning, Yuuji backed off and you offered him a smile in appreciation.

The night hadn’t even started and you had already begun to regret going out but you changed your mind after Nobara came back to the table with your drink.

By the time you were drinking your second drink, you started to think that this could be the best night of your life. You had missed these guys.

“Can l have everyone’s attention?” Nobara stood up from her seat, Maki hit her own forehead in embarrassment. A couple of heads turned to look in your direction since she was being a little too loud.

The atmosphere and people who came here were usually quiet after all. You didn’t know why you had come here over all the places you could have gone to but then you remembered how bad the nightlife here in the city was during winter. It was either this quiet pub, the sophisticated cafe, or that one place you and Nobara both had sworn to never go ever again.

Once every head turned to her she smiled and continued. “Thanks for everyone coming here tonight.” Panda started cheering, she shushed him and spoke once again. “I’m very glad to have you all here and-” she started sobbing, “I’m so happy we’re here altogether even though we’re missing some people and-” She choked up on her words.

Maki got up from her seat with a sigh and hugged the girl, trying to get her to sit down before she embarrassed herself more. She regretted letting her taste her cocktail. Yet, Nobara stood up and spoke again. “This is for (name)!”

Following her lead, everyone lifted whatever drink they were holding and held a toast for you.

Everyone kept chatting and drinking. Soonly you lost track of time and began to doze off a bit. You could barely keep your eyes open. You stared down at your drink, listening to your friends’ chatter was kind of soothing. Out of a sudden, you felt something drop. You felt feverish and held on to the nearest person you could cling to. You were clinging onto Megumi, who jolted in surprise.

“Are you feeling okay?” he asked.

Shaking your head, you covered your mouth with your hand.

“Uh oh! We have a puker!” Nobara laughed and hiccuped.

As Megumi made a move to help you towards the bathroom, Inumaki appeared behind you.

“Takana,” he said, nodding in Megumi’s direction and grabbing you by your arm. Following him, you hastily walked towards the bathroom, Maki was watching the two of you closely, before she could follow you to the bathroom Panda grabbed her wrist.

“She’ll be fine.” He gave her a genuine smile and Maki returned to the table where Yuuji had arrived with more drinks. She sipped her cocktail and decidedly carded her fingers through her girlfriend’s hair who was trying to get over her hiccups.

Inumaki opened the stall and let you down. You started puking while sobbing. He brushed your hair back to your nape and lifted it so that you could empty your stomach in relief. He was rubbing your back to help you.

A groan left your lips before you retched grossly, you could feel something was very wrong, you lifted yourself up from the toilet seat.

“Takana?”

You flinched, you had forgotten who was in here with you. He was holding out paper towels for you to wipe your mouth. Quickly taking the paper towels from him and wiping your mouth clean, you nodded slowly.

“T-thank you.” Stuttering, you tried to get up but stumbled backward. “Can you help me to get back to Nobara?” you asked when he helped you get up.

“Okaka.”

You tried to stand up straight, you were trembling, your legs were like jelly. You could feel the feverish heat from drinking too much spreading through your body. You had to go home, or somewhere far away from Inumaki.

Pushing him away, you walked towards the door until suddenly collapsing to the floor when your head sharply spun. Your legs weren’t capable of holding you up, especially right now when you were this drunk.

Inumaki helped you up, he was holding you in between his arms, your back pressed against his chest. “Please, I… I wanna go home…” You felt him press his nose into your hair, taking a long whiff and press himself against you.

Yelping, you squirmed, moving away from him.

He gave a sigh in annoyance. He never liked it when you struggled too much, you knew that.

It was as if the world was moving in slow motion, he opened his mouth to say something and you helplessly stood there, unable to do anything but cover your ears, hoping you wouldn’t hear it.

“Sleep.”

~~~

“Are you sure?” Maki slurred, silently cursing herself for drinking.

“Inumaki always used to hang out with her, I think he can take care of her,” Panda said. “What’s her address?”

All the heads turned to the now asleep Nobara. Maki cursed herself once again for letting her girlfriend drink.

“Well, she can stay at his place, right?” Yuuji asked, trying to fix the skirt of your dress so you wouldn’t flash anyone while Inumaki carried you on his back. “He has a guest room, it’s very big too!”

Megumi nodded approvingly, “Yeah, he does. I’d stayed there before. I think it’d be fine if she slept there for tonight.”

Maki had to take a moment to decide. Her place was going to be full tonight, she already had a drunk girlfriend she needed to carry back home aside from the other two idiots who were going to crash at her place. Ugh, if only Nobara hadn’t promised to let Yuuji and Megumi borrow their guest room, or if only she hadn’t let Nobara taste her drink, she could have taken you with them.

“O-okay,” she relented. “Make sure she drinks a lot of water throughout the night and call her a tab in the morning, if she can’t pay I’ll pay for her later so lend her money.”

Inumaki nodded and took a step forward to walk past the group’s table. Everyone told him to be careful and have a goodnight, he simply bowed his head before he exited the bar.

Once outside, he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Thankfully, the walk to his place was short.

~~~

When Panda told him that they were going to meet up in a bar to surprise you for a reunion, Inumaki had no choice but tag along.

He knew you had been avoiding him, he wasn’t that dumb but each time he went to Nobara’s reunion parties at Maki’s place, he hoped you would be there. Yet you were nowhere to be found, nobody but Nobara knew your address. It was as if you wanted to disappear from everyone’s lives but Inumaki could never forget anything about you.

No one could easily forget their first love after all. Although he had heard people say first love never lasts, it simply wasn’t true. Because no matter if it was the first or the last, true love never died.

Inumaki knew he would take his last breath thinking about you and he wished you would do the same. However, with the way you were acting, it was easy to tell you were confused about who your true love was.

So, he gave you time. You would come back to him once you realized how nobody could love you as much as he did.

He also liked to believe he was forgiving when it came to you if it was about you needing space and that you had a believable reason to push him away. Nevertheless, seeing you at the bar in that dress you probably wore to impress some nobody and let both Megumi and Yuuji touch you like that… It made him angry. Jealous.

Nobody touched what was his.

Taking off your dress and underwear, he looked at you with admiration. Just as he guessed, your naked body looked the best. It had been an awful long time since he had seen you.

An airy gasp left his lips while he placed a hand on your naked chest, trailing his fingers down, down, and down until he could run a finger across your slit.

Despite being asleep, you were wet.

He held his finger up to his face to stare at the small bead of clear fluid that ran down the digit, not wanting to let it go to waste, he licked it.

Luscious as always.

His cock was painfully hard against the rough fabric of his jeans but he had time. Unlike any other times at the dorms, tonight both of you had full privacy to do whatever you wanted without anyone interrupting your precious intimate moments.

Inumaki crawled between your legs on his bed and took a skillful lick against your pussy. A smile crept on his face when your body reacted. Using his thumbs, he spread your folds to expose your bare pussy to his hungry eyes. He watched small bits of your juices connecting your folds together split and break apart before he slurped them to savor your taste.

He flicked his tongue on your clit repeatedly to see if it would wake you up but your legs moved slightly, nothing else.

Taking a shaky breath from excitement, he pressed his tongue flat on your clit before drawing tight circles on the sensitive nub. This time, he heard you exhale sharply along with a hum.

Gently, he took your clit in his mouth, letting his teeth graze over the nub faintly before swirling his tongue around it. He added two digits into the mix, curling them just the way that made you buck your hips. When you responded as he thought you would, he started scissoring his fingers in and out of you and continued flicking his tongue on the sensitive nub.

Soon enough, your breathing got uneven and you jolted awake. He slurped all of your juices that gushed out of your slick heat, no matter how confused you were the sensations of him sucking and licking your cunt made you instinctively grab a chunk of his hair as you arched your back involuntarily.

He pulled himself back from you, eyes hazy with lust, reddened lips were swollen and glistening from leftovers of your juices.

You blinked a couple of times. Looking around to understand where exactly you were and the framed pictures of you and your classmates were enough to let you know if the familiar smell that belonged to him wasn’t. A laugh escaped you, it was too absurd and pathetic. The shame you felt wouldn’t go away if you tried covering your naked body so you covered your eyes with your forearm instead, sobbing softly.

Your sobbing became louder when you felt the bed sink, indicating him crawling on top of you. He wrapped a hand around your wrist to pull your arm away from your face but you kept your eyes closed, refusing to look at him.

His hot breath ghosted over your face, his free hand caressed your cheek gently and placed his thumb on your lower lip. He cupped your cheeks and squeezed them until your lips puckered.

You felt him press his lips onto yours, he squeezed harder, prying your mouth open to worm his tongue inside of your mouth. The taste of your own juices and his saliva mixing together in your mouth was too much. Squirming, you turned your head to the side abruptly to prevent him from kissing you.

“Is it because I’m weak?” you forced a chuckle, your voice broke out to a sob. “Is it because others could overpower you unlike me?”

For the first time tonight, you met his gaze. He shook his head slowly disappointedly as if the things you asked were nonsense.

“Why then?”

He left your question unanswered and leaned down to your face, pausing when your lips were barely touching. “Kiss me,” he whispered as the two of you were breathing on each other.

Your lips parted, allowing him to suck your bottom lip into his mouth before moving his tongue inside to massage your tongue. You were complying thanks to his order, rolling your tongues over each other and kissing him back as hungrily as he kissed you.

Inumaki broke the kiss, watching the glossy strand of saliva connecting your lips together slowly thin and split apart as he tried unbuckling his belt using one hand.

The sound of his belt buckle rattling and the tugging of a zipper made you look at him, watching his every movement as he tugged down his jeans, his rock-hard cock moved under the damp spot on his boxers while he tried getting rid of the jeans.

Next was his shirt, he reached with two hands behind his head, grabbing the shirt from the back of his neck, and yanked it off over his head in a swift motion.

It made you blush despite the situation, the way he moved was as if the two of you were intimate lovers.

Silence in the room caught his attention, his eyes landed on you after he threw his shirt towards a laundry pile. You were laying on your back, blushing while looking at him.

“Sujiko,” he breathed, sounding astonished and enjoying this vulnerable side of you that you were showing him. He had missed you, there was no reason to hold back anymore.

Inumaki hooked his thumbs under the waistband of his boxers and pulled them down, letting his cock bounce free as the pressure of the fabric disappeared.

Once naked, he moved between your legs, closing the distance between your hips agonizingly slowly.

He drooled over his cock, covering it generously in his slick saliva, and wrapped a hand around the base to give his throbbing erection a slow pump as he continued watching you. Noticing your eyes on his hand wrapped around his cock, following it as he slid it along his length, he pulled back the thin layer of skin to show you the pink tip glistening with precum.

Your mouth gaped, watching his fist twist as it moved closer towards the tip of his cock.

Decidedly, he tapped the tip of his cock on your clit and dragged it along your folds to coat it with your juices.

“It looks bigger than I remember.” You were more surprised than he was, what you said was something that slipped, unbidden. Just thinking out loud. It wasn’t even supposed to spur him on but Inumaki shoved his entire length inside of you. “W-wait-”

Both of you moaned for different reasons.

He swallowed hard, his vision almost fading to black because of the gummy flesh of your insides pulsating around his cock. Balancing himself on his arms and only taking a quick moment to catch his breath, he pulled out before frantically pushing his cock back in.

“Don’t move,” you pleaded, “It hurts.” You grabbed him by the shoulders, digging your nails into his skin as the girth of his cock stretched your walls to take the shape of it. His size was overwhelming and unbearable, you hadn’t had sex in too long, meaning that your fingers were tiny compared to his cock.

As you tried moving away from him by digging your heels onto the bed and pushing yourself up, Inumaki wrapped his arms around your waist before pulling you closer to himself with his cock buried deep inside you.

“Don’t run away from me,” he whispered, his voice husky and breathless. He needed to drink his cough syrup right now if he didn’t want his throat to bleed. But having a sore throat was a small price to pay if it meant he could let you know about his feelings. “Put your arms around me, hold me tight.”

Your heels that were digging onto the sheets went limp upon his words. Hands that were trying to push him on his shoulders suddenly wrapped around his neck, desperately pulling him closer.

“Let go of me,” you hissed but his lips crashing against yours shut you up. He tasted of blood, his tongue was smothered by that coppery taste. You didn’t get to grimace as he surged his hips forward, rather forcing a moan out of you to snake his tongue down your throat.

You felt dizzy from his pace, a scream of pleasure left your lips, causing him to break the kiss. He buried his face into the crook of your neck, grunting, still continuing his beastly pace and licking the sensitive skin of your neck.

“Toge,” you moaned, trying to get him to slow down but hearing you say his name sparked something within him. It had been so long since he had heard you call him by his first name.

His hips moved at a frenzied pace, he was humping you frantically like a rabid animal in heat. He was desperate, anyone could tell. Since he had his arms around your waist, you had nowhere to run, he pounded in your slick heat rapidly, putting his entire weight behind each thrust to reach deep inside you. The tip of his cock kissed your cervix every single time he slammed his hips against yours and his balls slapped against your ass.

“Be mine,” he begged, his voice deep yet faint and almost scratchy. “Be mine, be mine, be mine, be mine-”

This time, you kissed him, catching him off guard and stopping his babbling. None of you knew if it was his cursed speech that did it or if you did it with your own will. Even so, your lips sloppily moved against each other as his pace slackened a little but not quite.

Your legs wrapped around his hips when he started angling his hips to stroke the gummy flesh of your insides with each thrust as he kissed you. Kind of romantic if anything.

Sickeningly, your walls clenched around his cock at the thought. Your hand moved between your bodies and rested on your clit to draw tight circles on the nub. Your gummy insides pulsated around him. His hips started moving staggeringly, he was losing his rhythm because of you.

Inumaki slammed his forward and withdrew himself from the kiss, a spring was coiling tightly in his guts as he stared at you dreamily. He wanted to cum looking at you.

A wave of pleasure abruptly washed over you like a lightning strike when you felt his cock throb inside you. Completely dissolving into pleasure, you moved your hand on your clit faster.

As your orgasm was shaking to your core, Inumaki was lost in his world, chasing after his own release but thanks to your pussy palpitating from your high, he didn’t have to keep going.

His cock throbbed and he buried his cock deep inside your cunt one last time until the warm bursts of his thick seed could flood your womb, making your tummy feel pleasantly toasty.

Time slowed, yet he continued fucking his cum into you, he wasn’t done indulging in your heat.

At least, that was until he heard you mewl out his name.

He was brought back to the present, his cock still pressed snugly inside of you as he listened to what you had to say.

“Please let me move on,” you begged, voice breaking. Your eyes were glossy with tears but you tried holding them back. “I knew from the beginning that you were just playing with me but… no matter how painful it was, I was glad to be embraced by you.”

Inumaki smiled, his hand went to caress your cheek, his thumb drew a gentle circle on the soft skin and he shook his head.

You leaned into his touch, “Why me?”

He mouthed something that made your tears spill down. Wiping your tears, he pressed a kiss on your lips, promising you to never let you go without saying anything.

In the end, silence spoke louder than words.

[hansolmates]

g.p.s - god, parents suck | m

summary; seokjin just wants to enjoy the disney treatment and you are more than happy to deliver pairing; dilf!jin x hotelier!reader genre/warnings; crack, humor, gets a lil emotional, teenage daughter issues, one very minor allusion to a daddy kink LOL, a very vaguely implied sex scene, so CHEESY  w.c; est. 5.1k a/n; wee my first jin fic! this is for @btsghostiewritersnet​ #DynamiteDads event! I was supposed to go to disney this year but sadly miss rona had to cancel our plans so this is just pure self indulgence. as always thank u to @eerieedits​/ @chillingtae​ for the disney dream fic banner!

if you like it give it a bippity-boppity-boop on the like and share buttons! ✨✨✨

“Left, left!” Seokjin cries, holding onto the emergency break for dear life, “not my left, your left!” 

“We’re facing the same way! We have the same lefts!” 

“Clearly not if we’re going right, Sweetheart.” 

“But the GPS says to go right!” 

“In four-hundred feet, keep left at the fork,” Google Maps interrupts pleasantly.  

“That’s it. Kim Yeji, pull over!” 

“But Daaaaaaaaad,” yet his daughter complies, sadly pulling over at the edge of the road. She doesn’t even have to step on the gas, just turns the wheel slightly so she can land slowly, pathetically on the gravel. 

“Angel,” Seokjin says levelly, reaching over to unclick the seatbelt. “I will drive the rest of the way, I gave you time to practice for you have to drive to college but we can’t get on the highway like this.” 

“You never let me do anything.” 

“What, I do! Who let you go to prom in that sequined excuse for a dress?” 

“Uncle Namjoon!” 

“Fine, I’ll give him that! Who let you dye your hair to a crisp—” 

“Uncle Hoseok!” 

“Uncle–” Seokjin is affronted, jabbing the seatbelt in it’s locked position when he gets in the front seat. “Forget it, let’s just have a peaceful drive for the next few hours until we get to the hotel,” he removes Yeji’s phone from the holder, placing it in her lap. 

“Dad,” she waves her phone around, pointing to Google Maps, “you need the GPS to get there.” 

He scoffs, “No, I don’t. We’ve been to Disney plenty of times. I know where we’re going.” 

“Oh yeah? When’s the last time we went to Disney?” 

“When you were two? Three?” 

Yeji relaxes in her seat, not ready to argue with her dad once more. “Alright, lead the way,” she gestures vaguely to the empty parkway, devoid of life for miles. 

Seokjin is undeterred, reaching over the console to pat Yeji’s blonde hair. He turns on the radio, only to be met with the sound of crunchy static and terrible country music. Cutting the radio, he immediately switches to an old Disney CD, telling Yeji to let it go as he pulls into the open road. Reddish dust clouds around the car briefly, ripping against the tires as they drive off to their hotel. 

“Is this the Princess Hotel?” 

“Nope, this is the Prince S Hotel.” 

You can’t help but grin at the way your current customer’s face falls. He’s a handsome thing, all plush and pillowy in the cheeks and lips. Despite his daughter hanging off his arm like a limp noodle—after all it’s past 2AM and they’ve probably been driving for hours—he still manages to look somewhat put-together despite you telling him they’ve got the wrong place. 

“Told you, use the GPS,” her daughter chastises weakly, tucking her cheek in his shoulder. 

His kid’s a pretty girl, kind of reminds you of when you were a teenager. “The Princess Hotel is about an hour away on the other side of the Disney resorts,” you say slowly, noting from the way the girl is swaying on her feet that her father must be equally as tired, “although, I would suggest staying here for the night. Your daughter’s about to fall asleep on my counter.” 

At the pointed look you’re giving the teen, Seokjin puts a protective hand on her slim shoulders. “Yeji-bear, why don’t you lie down for a bit,” he leads her over to a spare couch. “We’ll call our booked hotel,” he says shortly, looking over his shoulder to give you a forced smile. 

Ah, you’ve seen this scene one or two times in your days working at Prince S. A father too prideful to admit he may have messed up just a little with the directions, and a child that probably argued or simmered so hard on the way they’re passed into a stupor on your lobby couch. Tonight, or your early morning is a little special though, you’ve never seen a father as handsome as the one in front of you, exasperatedly calling up their real hotel reservations. 

“What? My reservation has been revoked?” her daughter groans when he jostles around his lap, knocking her head, “how can you do that? Past the time? I thought this was Disney!” 

You drum your nails against the counter, using your other hand to pull up your guest list for the night on the computer. The father, now furrowed in the face, walks up to you and leaves his daughter on the plush couch. 

“One double bedroom for the weekend, please,” the father pulls his cards out, flicking it to your side of the counter. He places down his car keys in the available holder, “I parked out front, you do valet right?” 

With a nod, you get to work. “Take it they weren’t very accommodating?” 

“They gave our hotel room to some Make-A-Wish Foundation kid!” he cries exasperatedly, hands in the air as you patiently book the room. Your eyes linger longer than usual on his driver’s license and ID: Kim Seokjin. Even his driver’s license mugshot looks handsome. He rests his arms against your counter, despondent. “Is it terrible for me to hate on some kid with a terminal illness?” 

“A little,”  you shrug, slipping his keycard under his elbow, “but I mean according to your, Yeji-bear,” you can’t help but giggle at the nickname, “if you used the GPS you’d be at the correct hotel.” 

“Don’t remind me,” Seokjin glares, hauling his and Yeji’s luggage in one hand, “baby, let’s go upstairs c’mon.” 

You watch the small family trudge to the elevators,  sleepily walking forward like zombies. No one spares you a second glance, they never do, so it gives you ample courage to take a look at Kim Seokjin’s toned body. Broad shoulders, a Dorito-trimmed waistline, and long legs that you want to climb up on.

Oh, daddy. 

“Hey,” Yeji pops up on your counter, looking much perkier than she did hours before, “do you have my dad’s car keys?” 

Trying not to raise your brows at your young guest, you give her a smirk, leaning over the counter. A spunky thing, with sharp eyes with a pretty cat-tipped eyeliner shape that has her looking well put-together. You wish you had your shit together as a teenager, you barely have it together now. 

“I do,” you quip, “why?” 

“I wanna get Starbucks,” she says simply, “the pineapple matcha is to die for, and I want to drink as many summer specials as I can before it’s over.” 

“Valid,” you reply, going into your master key to retrieve all the guests’ keys. Taking Seokjin’s from its holder, you note the expensive make. Peering up from your desk, you look at Yeji’s innocent features. Before you place the key in her waiting palm, you snatch it away, “Why do I have the feeling you’re doing something that you’re not supposed to be doing?” 

Yeji tilts her head, “I don’t think it’s any of your business,” 

Sassy. You like it. “Get me a grande matcha frappe and your secret’s safe with me.” 

“Deal.” 

Watching Yeji drive off in the large Hyundai Palisade gives you a little twinge of worry, but you quickly tamp it down to motherly instinct. If you were Yeji’s mom—which you’re definitely not, you’d be worried. Naturally, you feel similarly. 

The hotel phone rings, the red light from 921 blinking on your switchboard. Flipping down the room number you pick up the receiver, “Prince S Hotel, how can I help you?” 

“You do booking, valet, and housekeeping?” Seokjin’s exasperated voice says in your ears, “who would I call if I want breakfast?” 

“That would also be me,” you reply wryly, twisting the curly wire between your fingers, “we advertise ourselves as a hotel for the quality, although we are much smaller with only thirty rooms. Sort of like a bed n’breakfast, getting the true royal treatment.” 

“Would the royal treatment consist of some extra towels and a continental breakfast?” 

“You got it.” 

A little cliché of you to do the whole “whistle while you work” segment—a lacy apron to make sure your uniform doesn’t get dirty, a spot of coffee to keep you peppy and setting everything up on a gold trimmed cart. You didn’t think you’d see Seokjin again, especially after how upset he was about his room. 

With a little rap on his door, Seokjin invites you inside to set up. Their room overlooks the valley as opposed to the busy roads, so it’s a perfect way to rise with the sun. He immediately reaches for the coffee as you drag your little cart in, completely ignoring the cream and sugar on the side. After a long sip, he moans in pleasure. 

“Ah,” he exhales, a sound that has you teeming. You grip the handlebars a little tighter than usual, “Maybe it was fate that we ended up here.” 

“Maybe,” you fight the urge to bite your lip, because Seokjin has no idea how cliché of a line that is. He isn’t even speaking directly at you, talking in front of the sun like it’s his morning routine. “Say, have you seen Yeji around?” 

“Ah,” you shug, pretending to be oblivious, “I think she went out for a walk.” 

He turns to you, giving you a quivering brow, “She hates walking. Probably calling her friends in Korea or something.” 

Of course she doesn’t like walking, you think, that’s why she took your car for some overpriced drinks. 

Instead, you place the fresh pancakes and sides on the guest table, making sure everything is organized and in order. You place the towels atop the haphazardly made bed, making sure to put two mints on top. It isn’t customary to include mints, but you think the mints your hotel has taste great and deserve to be shared around more often than not. 

“So, it looks like you’re ready for Disney,” you remark, taking note of his outfit. He has on blush mid-thigh shorts, stretchy and made from a canvas fabric that looks airy and comfortable. Around his neck is a little portable fan, and on his head is an old Mickey baseball cap. 

“Ah, just for today and tomorrow! Sunday is my ‘me’ day,” Seokjin says, dashing across the room at the sight of fresh food, “Yeji is meeting with some cousins and will be spending the rest of the weekend with them.” 

“Sounds like a fun weekend,” you remark, turning to leave. 

“Will you be working the rest of the weekend?” 

This is supposed to be small talk. You try to convince yourself that Seokjin is just being polite, wondering if his service is going to be impacted by you being around or not. There must be nothing sexual, or just mere attraction, going on between the two of you. Well, maybe on your side of things. The pink shorts and the baseball cap are doing things to your body that you barely understand. Unfortunately, the eager apples of his cheeks and the innocent upturn of his lips lets you know that any possibility of returned affections is virtually nonexistent. 

“It’s my weekend off,” you fight the twinge of excitement when you see Seokjin pout, “but Park Jimin relieves me, and he’s definitely a much better host than I am. He’ll make sure everything’s taken care of.” 

“Does he make better pancakes than you?” Seokjin asks, swirling a bite in a ribbon of maple syrup.  

“I’m afraid not,” you smile, “he makes a mean breakfast burrito though.” 

He shrugs listlessly, eating slower. He takes his time to make sure every pancake is cut in equal two-centimeter pieces, taking his time as if he’s savoring the last of your home-cooked meal. “Not sure if I’ll be completely satisfied then.” 

With a firm smile, you wheel your cart out as fast as you can. You can’t keep up the facade now, not with your trashy mind and your dampening panties ruining your sense of self. Quietly slamming the door behind you, you’re met with Seokjin’s spitting image. 

Yeji tilts her head at you, eating you alive with her dead-on stare. She places the keys and your matcha beverage on your cart. 

“Did my dad confuse you or something?” 

“Is it that obvious?” 

“He’s like that,” Yeji shrugs, taking a long sip of her drink, “don’t worry, I’ll put in a good word for you.” 

A good word? With an uneasy smile you wheel away, ignoring the burn in your cheeks.

“Can I have the keys?” Yeji asks the next morning, minutes before your shift ends.

You fight the urge to roll your eyes. You’re sure Yeji is a wonderful kid and has a good heart, but she’s seriously putting your five-star Yelp review on the line. Cocking one eyebrow you say, “What, need your Starbucks fix?” 

“Do you know how to parallel park?” 

“Why, need a teacher?” 

“It’d be better to have someone nearby to make sure I don’t park into a guard rail.” 

“Does Seokjin approve?” 

“You obviously know the answer to that,” Yeji replies, “and you and my dad are on a first-name basis, huh?” 

Fighting the heat in your cheeks, you busy yourself by locking up the money box and key tin, but not before grabbing the keys to the Palisades. “I’m doing this for you because I have impeccable customer service skills,” you feign haughtiness, leaving your front desk and scanning your ID to clock out. 

“Not because you think my dad is hot?” she follows you out the door. 

“Do you always talk about your dad like that?” 

Yeji is silent as she takes the keys from your grip, and you follow her in the passenger seat. A scent that’s fruity yet musky fills your nostrils, and you hug your arms for comfort. This is painfully awkward, at least in your point of view, but Yeji pays no mind as she connects to her Spotify playlist and turns on the air conditioner. 

“I’m not one of those prissy daughters that try their damn hardest to make sure their dad doesn’t date,” Yeji murmurs, adjusting the mirrors, “anyone my dad dates will be better than Hyehwa. He deserves to be happy for all that he’s done for me.” 

“Hyehwa?” 

“The biological carrier for nine months,” Yeji replies dryly. 

Your heart pinches, squeezing against your ribcage as you put two and two together. Hyewha, who you’re assuming is, or was Yeji’s mother, is definitely out of the picture. Yet seeing how confident Yeji is with herself, and how much he loves her father and wants him to be happy, is clear in your eyes. 

“You are one cool kid,” is the only thing you can say, hoping you don’t have that silly heartened look in your gaze. 

It seems that you do, because all she does is roll her eyes and put the car in drive. 

It’s nearly one in the morning when you get the call. 

You’re off the clock, but it’s graveyard hours and you and Jimin are craving pizza. So while Jimin tends to the last minute guests, you pick up a cheesy pie and hide behind the desk while Jimin does his job. 

You’ve polished off half the pie when the main phone rings, and Jimin sighs heavily. Late night and early morning calls are the absolute worst. 

“Get the hospital on speed dial,” Jimin jokes, but not really because the last time someone called at one, you really did wish you had an ambulance on-site. 

“Prince S hotel,” Jimin spins the cord between his fingers, looking like a dreamy teen heartthrob as he leans against the counter. He immediately swings the phone over to your greasy fingers, “it’s a personal call.” 

Wiping your hands on the box, you raise a brow. “Hello?” you ask, wholly confused. 

“Mm, it’s Yeji,” the voice slurs on the other line, “I need help.” 

“A-are you drunk?” you say, incredulous.

“Yeah, me and my cousin snuck a bottle downtown,” Yeji sounds nervous, and you unconsciously grip the phone tighter, “can you pick us up? I can drop you my location if you give me your number, please. My dad trusted me with the Palisade this weekend, I can’t let him know what happened. I know I’m always trying to get under my dad’s skin and whatever but I don’t want him to lose my trust, what we did is a dumb mistake.” 

A part of you feels for Yeji, you’ve done dumb shit like this when you were young. All those fond memories are nothing but memories, and definitely not reflective of your current life now. 

The rational, intelligent part of you knows that you should probably call Seokjin right now and tell him what’s going on. You don’t really want to get involved in their family matters, especially when as of late you’ve been inserting yourself in Yeji’s antics. 

With a sigh, you pull up your Lyft app, already knowing whose side you’re on. 

It takes no more than fifteen minutes for you to arrive at the scene, Yeji and what you assume is her older cousin sitting on the curb of a dilapidated Krispy Kreme, sadly polishing off a whole box of glazed donuts, Well, her cousin is polishing off the box, Yeji is taking nibbles at her proffered donut. 

You sigh, pulling Yeji up. You see tear-streaks, her previously perfect cat-eye smudged off and running down her cheeks. “I’m sorry,” she whispers, sounding not as inhiberated as she did before, “I bothered you.” 

“Not at all,” you soothe, running a hand down her braids. You try not to melt when Yeji nearly leans into your warmth, but backs up at the last second, “I’m happy that you called. Would rather know that you’re safe now than later, yeah? I’m not mad at you,” you assure, pulling a crumpled brown napkin from the pizzeria to dab at her ruddied cheeks. 

“Hi, I’m Jungkook,” you turn your head dangerously slowly towards the cute muscle pig who’s still sitting on the curb, “Ya deserve a five-star Yelp review for this service—” 

“But I’m mad at you,” you pointedly ignore his drunken charm. He looks old enough to drink, which only further annoys you because he should be the one taking care of Yeji, “get in the damn car, Youngkook.” 

“It’s Jungkook—”

“Get in.” 

He swallows his tongue, and you notice Yeji stifling a giggle at your attitude. She wordlessly hands you the keys, clamoring in the front seat while Jungkook takes the whole back row. Yeji tiredly informs you the address to her cousin’s hotel, and you drive off into the night. 

“Did I ruin my dad’s chances with you?” you think that Yeji has no clue what she’s saying, but there’s a little sliver of heart in her tone. Her face is pressed against the window, the cold glass on the verge of keeping her awake as she stumbles in and out of consciousness. 

“You could never do that,” you mumble, and you smile when her eyes willingly flutter shut. 

“Hey, babe,” you practically hear desperation in Jimin’s voice.

“Jimin, no,” you already know that his request is sitting prettily on the tip of his tongue, “it’s my weekend off. I’m not getting out.” 

“But someone requested your pancakes,” he whines, and you can practically feel his pout on the other line, “and he said and I quote ‘I’ll be able to tell that you made them.’ I feel threatened!” 

“Did they offer to pay in diamonds?” 

“N-no. But he said it’s his daughter’s special weekend and he’d be really thankful if you’d come by and make your breakfast for him.” 

Daughter? Yeji. You sigh, rubbing a hand over your face. You have your own room separate from the hotel, a deal that has you living rent free in exchange for your hard labor five days a week. “Heat up the stove for me and crisp the bacon,” you mutter, hanging up and throwing the phone under the covers. 

Tugging your hair back and throwing on a large hoodie, you put on your slippers and pad down the little sidewalk that leads to the hotel. The sun beats down on you immediately, willing you to go back to your air-conditioned room to fall back asleep. Swimming through the soup that is the Californian air, you shuffle inside Prince S and make a beeline for the kitchens. You brush through busy employees, flashing a quick smile and “good morning” as you get to your station.

Jimin is already there, sitting at your workspace. All your ingredients are sitting out: flour, eggs, butter, vanilla, baking powder, baking soda, buttermilk, and fresh berries. However, Jimin makes  no moves to attempt cooking, instead looking at you with pursed lips and waiting for you to get a move on. 

“Get your butt off my counter,” you slap his thigh disapprovingly, pulling your sleeves up to start mixing the ingredients, “you’re dirty.” 

“I embrace being dirty,” Jimin replies majestically, kicking his legs back and forth. His Doc Marten creepers wave in your vision, “thank you for swinging by. He said that it was really really important that you come in and make them. Daughter’s request.” 

“They’re lucky they’re a cute family,” you mutter under your breath, although the words aren’t laced with malice. 

The batter is fluffy and puffy, rising with the scent of melted butter and caramelized sugar. You take careful fingers towards the berries, creating a smiley face in the uncooked pancakes. 

“Is your maternal side kicking in?” Jimin says in your ear, and you swing at him with your spatula. 

“Leave me alone, art is being made.” 

“Sure,” Jimin hops off the table, patting your shoulder, “I got a date with room 69,” you roll your eyes, there is no such thing as room 69. “So please continue to be awesome and finish off this favor by delivering it to Mr. Kim’s room.” 

“Jimin, no!” you don’t care that half the staff is staring at you amusedly, the other half uncaring because they’re so used to the two co-managers. “I’m not wearing—I’m not wearing pants.” 

You gesture to the obscene amount of bare legs out in the open. California’s hot as hell, you try to wear as little layers as possible. However, in the workplace you like to keep a modicum of decency. Even though Kim Seokjin is fine fine fine, you have decorum. 

But Jimin’s already off to visit the guest in room 69 and you’re stuck with a pile of fresh hotcakes and none of the workers want to get involved in your shenanigans. Typical. Begrudgingly, you force your Hallmark-esque smile and arrange the gold trimmed cart, taking care to put extra berries in the fruit dish. 

It’s a simple transaction. Get in, drop off the food, accept the tip if Seokjin feels generous, and get out. The door to room 921 looks larger than life, intimidating like the gates to heaven. You knock firmly, but gingerly. “Room service?” the voice that escapes your lips is your sugary professional voice, one that makes you wince immediately. 

A muffled “coming!” has you bristling at the door. You curse yourself, looking at your bunny-clad feet and your legs disappearing under your hoodie. 

As soon as Seokjin pops his head open you blurt, “I swear, I’m wearing shorts underneath this.” 

“Uh,” and that forces him to look at your legs. Dammit, it was a good intention but the wrong way to go. “Good to know,” he coughs, opening his door wider. 

The room is much messier on Seokjin’s side of the room, now filled with Eeyore and Baymax memorabilia. A large, white Baymax plush sits innocently at one side of his untouched bed. You crack a smile at that. 

“Where’s Yeji?” you ask lightly, putting both stacks of pancakes down on the available table. You absently wipe the crumbs off, leading the little pile of food-crust to the garbage can. 

“Yeji?” Seokjin asks, “why would Yeji be here?”

The way you put the cutlery down instantly slows, “You called Jimin this morning saying you needed pancakes specifically made by me to give to Yeji.” 

“Who?” 

“Jimin?” you raise a brow, losing your high-pitched commercial tone. “Tiny, annoying blond guy?” 

Seokjin stares.

You stare back.

“Yeji’s at her cousin’s townhouse,” Seokjin states plainly. 

“No, you called and said Yeji wanted pancakes—” No. 

Yeji, or Jimin, or both called you and set it up. 

“Oh, Jimin’s an idiot,” you tap your head lightly, wanting to bop out any potential embarrassing memory that has burned in your brain, “must’ve misheard. Or is hearing ghosts! Honestly he isn’t the right mind I’m so sorry I reallygottaneedto—” 

You can’t even breathe let alone exhale the rest of your sentence, so you instead do the only thing you can do—run away. You don’t bother to exude grace as you plop any trash on the cart from yesterday’s room service, whipping the cart around so fast that the side wheels fly off and pop a wheelie. 

“We don’t have to let the food go to waste,” Seokjin says pointedly, probably watching you like he’s watching a comic show as you try to bolt out of the room. 

The door is closed, and the little hallway is too small for you to put your body and the cart between the walls. You’ve trapped yourself. Maybe you could just leave the cart and dip? You’re sure there’s at least two extras downstairs. 

“It won’t,” you reply dumbly, “I can eat it in the breakroom or something, I haven’t made breakfast for myself yet. I mean, I was kinda craving an avo-toast this morning, but pancakes are always a classic.” 

Seokjin snorts at your incessant rambling, carding a hand through his chocolate locks, “I’m trying to ask you to stay for breakfast.” 

“You’re trying to—oh,” you mirror his expression, running a hand over your hair so it pulls out of its already messy style. You haven’t done much physical activity this morning, but you feel absolutely breathless as you’re glued to the cheap carpet, taking in Seokjin’s wide glassy eyes

“And if you stay for dessert, I’d like to thank you properly,” 

“I didn’t bake dessert,” you hide the shudder in your throat when he steps closer, pinning you against the cart. Your knuckles must be transparent by now due to how hard you’re gripping the cart. 

“You didn’t,” Seokjin agrees, “but you definitely brought it.” 

You yelp, actually, a whole little dolphin-squeal escapes your lips as Seokjin puts his hand against the wall. You’re actually living a Disney-esque scenario that you do not want to be in. Seokjin’s either trying to give you the Eugene-Signature-Smoulder, or the Prince Naveen charm that isn’t very charming. 

“You’re a cheeseball,” you try to snap back, but it only comes out as a small reply, fitting of your cramped situation. 

His buttery brown eyes are clear and warm, and his sweet scent envelopes your form. You feel impossibly small, sinking deeper and deeper into your hoodie until you feel the heat of his voice sinking deep into your skin. 

It’s then that he leans in and whispers in your ear, his voice a simple request, “Please tell me that you’re interested in me too.” 

Something clutches softly in your heart, tethering you to Seokjin’s gaze. You wonder how many times Seokjin goes through this scenario. You wonder if he’s happy being a bachelor. You figure that many partners must have doubts being tethered by a teenage daughter, or if Seokjin is used to fleeting hook-ups.

“Have been since check-in,” you reply smoothly, finding your breath and looking up from your eyelashes.

Seokjin’s lips find yours, and you swear you’re lip-locking with Cloud Nine. They’re soft and supple and taste a little like maple syrup as they mingle with yours, and you can’t help but weave your hands through his equally silky strands, tugging him closer as he hooks his arms under your bare thighs. 

He gives your bottom an experimental squeeze, leading you to the unmade bed.

Needless to say, breakfast has to wait. 

“So, I’m going to throw a cliché.” 

“Sure, we’re in Disney.” 

“Why me?” you slap his bare chest when Seokjin laughs, pouting, “I mean it! All I did was look cute and give you pancakes!” 

“So you admit you’re cute,” Seokjin smirks. 

“C’mon don’t change the subject, tell me!” 

Even though this hotel is partially yours, you’re still amazed at the softness of the Egyptian cotton as it engulfs both your bodies. Maybe it’s because you’re warm and bathing in the noon afterglow, maybe it’s your bed partner. Still, it feels divine as you lounge in bed, sipping champagne (left by the door, courtesy of Jimin.)

“Mm, caught you driving around with Yeji in my car.” 

You sit up straighter, clutching the sheets to your chest, “You saw us last night?” 

“You were also out last night?” Seokjin tilts his head, “I meant when you taught her how to parallel park.” 

“Oh fuck—I mean,” you slap your forehead, knowing you can’t get away with this one, “Let’s just say I helped her out of a sticky situation. Don’t blame Yeji, blame Yeji’s bunny-headed cousin.” 

“Noted,” Seokjin throws an arm around you, snuggling closer. You relax into his hold, melting between the sheets and his soft skin, “Knowing you’re pulling through for her. Let’s just say I’m a little soft for my daughter, no matter how old.” 

“She’s wonderful,” you say genuinely, taking slow sips of your bubbly drink. 

“Wanna go visit her for lunch? I’m supposed to be meeting her in an hour.” 

You don’t feel deterred or nervous to see Yeji, or even the possibility of meeting Seokjin’s extended family. So you agree, run back to your room quickly to throw on a reasonable summer outfit that doesn’t consist of hooded sweatshirts and booty shorts. 

Seokjin offers to drive your sedan, and since you feel a little princess-ish today you decide to let him take the wheel. After a few minutes attempting to drive in the direction of the townhouse however, you lower the volume on the radio. 

“Jin? I think you’re going the wrong way,” not only do you live here, but you went to the townhouse last night and you’re sure it’s in the opposite fork, “do you want me to plug it in the G.P.S?” 

“I know my way, hon,” Seokjin waves you off, confidently streaming through the oncoming traffic. You smile nervously, you have a feeling this situation has happened once or twice. 

“Oh, is that why you ended up in my hotel?” you tease, “because you’re so good at directions?” 

“Duh,” Seokjin reaches for your hand atop the console, “after all, my intuition led me to you.” 

[my-daily-life95]

November 13, 2022

I'm nervous. I don't need to feel nervous. A few days ago I finished my training as a coordinator. Honestly I don't think I did well. I messed up doing the reports in the morning, took to long on doing the task sheets, missed assigning the vip rooms to the ladies, and completing the supervisor reports. I made so many mistakes that I'm sure I frustrated the he'll out of the girl who was training me. This week I'm told I have to do rooms and I'm ok with that. The hotel is busy and I don't mind doing rooms at the moment. I think I would have cried if I was told that I had to open the next day on my own. Now though I feel weird going into the office. It's so quiet when I'm in there with my bosses and the other coordinator. I don't like it at all. It makes me scared and I just want to leave as soon as possible. The longer I stay there the more I want to cry. I couldn't even talk to my friend when we had lunch together. It just stayed as an awkward silence till another housekeeper sat with us. I know in my mind I'm blowing this out of proportion. I just start thinking stupid thoughts. In my mind I start thinking "what if they regret giving me the position?" "What if they hate me?" "What if they think I'm useless for not getting everything right away?". I don't like this way of thinking but I know I'll be ok. Writing about my feelings really helps. Be it writing it online or in my journal I get to really look at what I'm feeling and why. There are some entries that I refuse to look at ever again because those periods of my life were not the best. Looking at this secondary blog I made is full of my insecurities and fears.

I made this blog to write on the go when I didn't have my actual journal with me. I have written more sad moments for me then happy ones. God, I really need to go back to therapy. I just can't help writing about sad moments for me. There were some happy moments that had recently happened to me and to the people that surround me.

Ok, a recently happy moment is that I got my drivers license. I passed my behind the wheel exam with only three misses. It's been eleven years since I first began to learn to drive and now I have my license at the age of twenty-seven. I never thought I would actually drive. I honestly was way to scared to try for the longest time. Now I have it. Now I can drive. I'm still scared getting behind the wheel but I was able to accept the promotion at work because I know how to drive. Even though at the moment I'm scared of my new position at work. One thing at a time, me. One thing at a time right? My parents gave me their old 2007 sienna. She's ok. I don't fully trust her but she gets me to and from work well. Once I have her under my name I'll be able to decorate her how I like. I already left a small stack of my cds in her. It's mostly BTS, TXT, and Blackpink. I only own kpop cds at the moment. I used to have a pretty good size collection when I was in middle school but I think I threw them away. I threw a lot of things away that I regret now. I'm not putting stickers on her that's for sure.

Oh, my friend at work saw that I had Tumblr in my phone. She asked what it was. I didn't know what to say. How do I explain this place to her? Not even the Houseman that over heard our conversation knew how to explain it. He still has his account. I was lucky that I was logged out. I would become a ghost if she saw what I put on here.

[loverdrew]

That Blonde Girl | s.r

Synopsis: Looking at Spencer with someone else never gets easier, but seeing him with someone he doesn’t even love, just to get over you, makes it even worse.

Based on Drivers License by Olivia Rodrigo <3

Warnings: angst, slight age gap (8+ years?), lots of sad memories

Loving Spencer came with a price. It came with turmoil, highs and lows, severe loneliness and lots of tears. But through all of those, he was the one person I wanted to share my greatest accomplishments and memories with. Any time I had good news, it was Spencer I turned to for support and happiness. We talked so much about the things we both wanted to eventually do with our lives. I remember calling him ecstatic when I passed my gun test for the BAU. He knew how afraid I was to even be in possession of the weapon, and cheered so loud for me when I came to his apartment with the paperwork and a huge smile on my face. One time, he surprised me with cupcakes when he told me about the teaching job he acquired at a nearby college. Knowledge was his passion, and sharing it with others made his heart sore; he wanted to teach, and he was a natural at it. 

But, throughout those happy moments, were some of the toughest we ever endured as friends. There were times I aimlessly drove around the block of his apartment building wanting so bad to knock on his door and cry to him about how upset and heartbroken he made me, and he didn’t even see it, nor apologize for it. I never asked for it, because he was never around to deliver it. I guess it is partly my fault for how things went. The love I had for Spencer Reid was unlike anything I had ever experienced. Hearing his name gave me goosebumps, feeling his presence made my skin burn with excitement. Spencer’s smile just about made me go weak in the knees and his laugh...I wanted to hear it the rest of my life over anything else. But did I ever express that to him? No. I wrote it down plenty of times, said it in the mirror to myself, sang about it in my car as if I was talking straight to him, but whenever I came around to saying it, it’s like my throat was closed off and words couldn’t describe how I felt.

That’s how JJ came into the picture. Emily said she had assumed Spencer and I would get together at some point, but after so long of being just friends she assumed it was fair game to finally come clean about her own feelings. Who am I kidding, that blonde girl always made me doubt. She’s so much older than me, closer to Reid’d age. She is absolutely everything I was ever insecure about when it came to myself. She was slim, had gorgeous eyes that lit up her face, a smile that could stop a show room, and she had Reid. Most of those car rides filled with my delusion of telling Spencer I love him also included self deprecation of how I couldn’t be anything JJ was. It was obvious why he said yes to dating her, and I continued to question my self worth. How could I ever love someone else.

I watched across the room at them, his hand on her lower back laughing with the rest of the team as I put files away, very slowly I might add. They all could see the pain in my eyes, and didn’t want to pester me anymore. I’m sure they were all tired anyway, of the way I missed him and how highly I talked of him. But, I kind of feel sorry for them in that regard, because they’ll never get to know him the way that I do. I know Spencer better than the back of my hand, I know every curve, twist, and turn of his heart. He doesn’t even need to look at me for me to know what is going on inside his crazy little mind. That was probably part of our downfall of friendship. He hated how easily I could read him, especially when it came to his mom. That was his one secret he thought he could keep from the group. I worried too much, he kept too much from me. I got too passionate during fights, and he didn’t know how to deal with these angry feelings he had. In a way we were polar opposites that complimented and destroyed each other all in the same way. But that was Spencer and I, and I never wanted that to change.

But he left.

He didn’t want to be my friend anymore, so I had to learn to be without him.

I could feel someone coming up next to me in the file room, and stood in front of me with sad eyes and a smile.

“Hey there.” She said softly.

“Hi Tara.” I replied, barely looking up at her eyes. 

“You need help sorting? It seems you’ve been in here forever.” She asked shyly.

“C’mon, you know why I’m in here.” 

“Yea, I know. But Rossi’s having another dinner party and they asked me to come over here to see if you’d come?” I glanced back to the group, to find the tall scientists eyes looming over us. He loosened his grip on JJ, sighing. A tear threatened to escape my eye, but before it could I straightened up and took a deep breath.

“Tara, do you understand how hard that is going to be for me?” She eyed me, knowing it was probably stupid to ask me, but worth a shot.

“We miss you though. We hate that you’ve been by yourself for the last year every night.”

“Well maybe that’s what I like now. It’s better than watching that.”

“You know the best way at rendering a broken heart is getting all dressed up, hanging out with your best friends, and getting just a little drunk.” I laughed, she had a point. I did miss hanging out with the team, especially my girls. And maybe Luke...yea, we’ll throw him in there.

“Fine. I’ll text you what I’m wearing for approval.” She smiled and gave me a small hug. Oh what awaits me for this night.

A few hours later...

I arrived in a black slip dress with thin straps and matching black heels at Rossi’s door. Tara immediately told me to wear this dress when she saw my closet on Facetime, and the shoes too. My hair was down, cascading down the open back of my dress. For once in almost a year I felt pretty confident about myself, but I knew that would change when I would see whatever masterpiece JJ was wearing, along with her handsome man. I don’t know if I could hold it together if I saw him in anything but work clothes. But here goes nothing.

Luke opened the door and picked me up while hugging me.

“It’s so good that you’re here Y/N. Really good.” He said in my ear. He put me down and I instantly got watery eyes. His thumb came up under my eyes to stop anything from coming out. “Hey, no crying here, tonight is going to be a good night okay?” I nodded and followed him inside to see everybody else. Rossi was cooking and gave me a BIG hello, the girls were sitting with their glasses of wine and then there was the happy couple. JJ was wearing a white jumpsuit, a masterpiece like I thought. And Spencer...my mouth fell open slightly. He was wearing a dark navy button up with the first couple of buttons undone, and a black pair of dress pants. His gold watch on display, definitely highlighting his vieny hands, and his hair in perfect messy curls.

“Wow gorgeous! You look stunning!” Garcia exclaimed, spinning me around.

“Uh huh, I told you that outfit would be a showstopper.” Tara said, raising her glass of wine.

“And I have you to thank, I will be contacting you every time I’m in a fashion crisis.”

I looked over at JJ, seeing she was looking at me, and she complimented my attire.

“You really do look great Y/N.” She said sincerely.

“Are you kidding? This pantsuit is amazing.” I tried to play it off that I wasn’t buzzing inside.

“Thanks, Reid helped pick it out a few days ago. Wasn’t sure if I could pull it off but I actually love it. And it has pockets!” We all shared a small laugh. My eyes caught the doctor, his eyes never once left me.

“You do have nice taste Spencer.” He had a tight lipped smile, and responded back.

“Black was always your best color.” It was quiet and short, but it made the hairs on my arms stand up nonetheless.

As we all ate, I couldn’t help but find Spencer every time I looked up from my food. It was a force of habit it seemed. I always spotted Spencer first. I always wanted to know how he reacted to things, whether he was laughing, smiling, or even feeling down. In the time we’ve known each other, I know we have never perfect, not even close. But, I had never felt the way I did for him, for anyone else. No one had my love like he did. Seeing his hand hold hers under the table, look at her first to see her reactions, felt like my chest was being squeezed by his hand, until there was no more. I never imagined he’d be so okay now that I’m gone. I never thought I wouldn’t matter to him. I guess all those things he ever said to me about being his person, his best friend, his everything, were things he never meant. And now here I am suffering, alone.

It got to a point where I had to step away from dinner, telling the group I just had to get some fresh air. I played it off as I had been feeling sick the whole day, but they all knew the reason, I think even JJ knew. But I excused myself kindly, and walked towards the backyard, out of view from the group. 

As I shut the door, a wale of tears overwhelmed my senses and I broke down on Rossi’s backyard steps. My wrists covered my eyes, I hunched over trying to control my sobs, flashbacks of the past year playing in slow motion. What did I do wrong? What could I have done better? Why wasn’t I enough for Spencer? Why didn’t he fight for me? It all came at me so fast. It made my heart pound louder in my ears, my sobs coming one after another after another. I prayed for it to stop, I just wanted the pain to stop.

Soon after, I heard the backyard door open, assuming it was Tara or even Luke. But, oh, I was dead wrong.

“Did I really hurt you that badly?” His voice cracked. My head whipped around and I stood up, flattening out my dress.

“Spencer just go I don’t need this right now. We don’t need this discussion right now.” I didn’t even try to wipe away my tears, I wanted him to see how broken I was. And that it was his fault.

“But you know I hate seeing you cry, and especially if it’s because of me.”

“Well it is because of you!” I shot my arms up. “God, Spencer, for the past year it’s been because of you! The old me, would’ve taken everything you threw at me but let me tell you about the new me. The new me won’t put up with any of your shit anymore. I won’t put myself through pain watching you out there with your new happy life.” I spat. “And you don’t get to show up now, and try to apologize or reconcile things. That shipped sailed a year ago. You had the chance Spencer, but no you decided to take the easy way out and be with someone who I know you don’t love.” At this point Spencer’s eyes filled with tears, trying hard to think of something to say, but there wasn’t anything he could come up with. “We can’t come back from this. Our friendship withheld a lot but not this. It hurts so much.” My voice cracked, and I looked away from him trying to regain some kind of composure. “I’m just going to get my stuff and go.”

As I walked past him to the backyard door, his words pull me out of my angry line of vision.

“I love you.” It was as if time stood still, and I dropped my hand from the door knob. My head turned back to look at him. “I’ve loved you since you first walked in through those glass doors, wearing all black. I love you. I loved you when you’d compliment my mix matched socks when everyone else thought it was bizarre. I love you. That day you spilled burning hot coffee on both of us in the jet was one of the best days I ever had with you because we both had to wear the ugly clothes they kept for us in the back and everyone laughed at us but we stuck it out. I love you.” He began walking closer to me. “That day you walked out of my apartment and vowed to never speak to me again, that was the day I wanted to tell you I love you, I meant to say it. I fucking meant to say it and I have kicked myself everyday for a year for not saying it to you, but I do. I really love you.” His hand came to caress my cheek, and I sobbed into the palm of his hand, remembering that day perfectly. “I love the way you find the good in little things, like the snow and bow ties on presents. I love that you could sing so good at the top of your lungs but still say you could never make it on Idol. I love that you make me love you in more ways than I can keep up with. I love you, and I promise you, from this day forward I will say it everyday to you. I will continue to remind you and do anything for you for you to believe in me.”

“What about JJ, Spencer?” I felt guilty, having him say this to me with full truth in his eyes yet his date was right through those doors.

“I think in some part of her she always knew. You don’t know how many times she caught me staring at pictures of you that we had taken together, or writing about you in my journals. If JJ’s as good a friend as I think she is, I think she’d want me to be happy.” His other hand came up to my cheek, holding me to delicately, making me look up at him. I cried trying to keep my eyes down. “I don’t know what’s bound to happen in 5 minutes before we walk through those doors, but all I know is I want this feeling to keep going. This love I have for you, I don’t ever want it to stop. I’m not ready for us to be over.” 

“Spence, you know how in those rom com movies I love to watch, after a big speech, the couple gets to kiss?” My streaky eyes met his, as hope filled his entire face.

“Yea, I do.” He laughed.

“Please do that for me.” And without hesitation, he did.

His lips crashed onto mine, molding together perfectly, creating the moment I had dreamt about since I met him. His kisses were filled with passion and romance, barely coming up to breath, as if air wasn’t essential to live anymore, but kissing me was. He held me so close, afraid of ever letting me go again. 

“Forever?” He said in between kisses, his lips still touching mine.

“Forever.”

[theyscreamjade]

Can you do Kiri, Iida, Izuku, and Bakugo with a s/o who goes deaf from a concussion received during a fight or even training. (I lost my hearing and I haven't seen much done for deaf readers. Thank you so much if you do respond hun.)

Severe Silence

Words can’t describe how I feel for you honey, Trust me, you’re not alone. I’ve always had hearing issues since I was born and they’re stating I may or may not lose my hearing in the future which hurts because music is my life and I can’t see myself without it. I hope this makes your day and if you need to talk, I’m always here.

Disclaimer: Slight Gore, Abuse and Acts Of Violence

————————————————————————————————————————

Eijiro Kirishima

* He remembers the whole accident that day because he was the one who carried you to the infirmary.

* It was training to see how you’d withstand during a earthquake and you were one of the following that was instructed to stand in a building.

* Aizawa wasn’t too keen on it but you insisted that you wanted a challenge.

* When the ground started to shake, wood, chunks of cement started tumbling down. You had your practice dummy to your back, running towards the safe exit with Ochacko and Shoji following close behind.

* Apart from the training, a ding would be heard when there’s another victim close by, you guys had the majority of them. Even though the earthquake ended, parts were still falling.

* You handed your dummy off and went off to find another one, and never returned.

* You were eventually sent to the hospital even though Recovery Girl healed you.

* You weren’t heard of for a while which worried your Sharky lover.

* During a free period, Baku-Squad including Deku, Momo, and Ochacko comes over to visit you.

* You were home alone and when you opened the door to see your friends, you couldn’t help but burst into tears because you couldn’t hear their excited voices to see that you’re fine.

* I do see Kirishima as the type to pull out his phone and ask you if you were okay through the notes app.

* You tell them back when you were grabbing the last dummy, you tripped and slammed your head into a large block of cement.

* Being the amazing boyfriend he is, he’s going to learn every possible way to speak to you.

* To sign language to even speaking as slow as he possibly can.

* He’s willing to do everything to make everything easier for you and to keep that gorgeous smile on your face.

* He knows how hard it is to lose something that you’re so used to having and it pains him to see you a tad bit depressed because you can’t hear him anymore.

* Just know he’s going to do anything that would seem impossible to help you through every step.

* This includes training, If you always relied on your ears he’ll help you try to find another way to smell a villain near you.

* He’s going to encourage you to keep going towards your dream and never give up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Izuku Midoriya

* His feet never ran so fast when you were found unconscious.

* During your first internship, You and Izuku were attempting to save Eri that day. Everyone was soon separated.

* When it seemed that it wasn’t going to be well, you sent him to go get Eri while you fought the villains with others.

* The mission was a success but came with painful consequences, You fought with a villain who was a tad bit advanced for you. You fought with all your might while the building warped and swirled.

* The last thing you could remember was the villain's backup appearing behind you and attacking you as everything became black.

* Luckily, One of the pro-heroes rushed over and defended you while their sidekicks quickly took you towards the medic.

* When Deku first found out, not even caring if he was injured or not. He wanted to see you. He wanted to make sure you were okay.

* It took him a while to see you and when he did, he was ecstatic to see you awake and responsive.

* He called your name but..you never responded, which confused him. He had to touch your shoulder, nearly giving you a heart attack as he asked what’s wrong and you just stared.

* Then, he knew..something was wrong.

* Upon finding this out, Izuku being the great and amazing guy he is will also take many precautions to learn to speak to you.

* His sign language is a tad bit rusty and sucks a bit, but give him a chance. He’s trying.

* In each conversation you two have, he’ll always make sure he’s speaking slow and you’re able to see his lips move.

* If he can’t speak or wearing a mask, he’ll either text you or type his words through his phone for you.

* He’s going to tell you that you should keep going on your fight to be a hero.

* Izuku will train with you and see if you two could discover a different method that you could use during battles.

* He will never give up on you and will always help you with your dreams.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katsuki Bakugo

* Everything happened so fast that even HE couldn’t keep up.

* One minute, You were kicking ass, destroying every villain in your way.

* Even though the attack was extremely random and with the permission from the teachers to fight these villains who interfere with your training for the fifth time in a span of a few years.

* Hell, you had your hero’s license so you had the right to kick their asses.

* You stood up, cracking your neck and fists before punching another villain back to the ground.

* Katsuki saw the purple blur flash past him as a large Nomu appeared to your turned back.

* Before he could even react, his body ran you over. His corrupted face looked down at what he did as Bakugo’s anger boiled over the surface. He grabbed the villain he was originally fighting and launched him into the Nomo before blasting them with his explosion as hard as he possibly could.

* No one hurts you. No one.

* It took Kirishima, Denki, Izuku, and lastly, a time-limited All Might to get him off the Nomo who he SURPRISINGLY knocked out.

* Once he could relax, he walks to your dorm. When he knocks and you don’t answer, it makes him worried.

* He won’t kick the door down..but..knock it off the hinges and discovers you crying on the bed.

* All the banging, knocking he did and you didn’t react while he was standing in front of him, his heart instantly knew that damn Nomu did something to you.

* He already knew sign language, there’s no lie in that.

* He knows it because his quirk has nearly made him deaf at times and it was told that he’d lose it before he would have a chance to be a hero.

* After the attack, he’s always by your side. He corrects people who try to talk to you and demands that they use sign language or their phones. He hates when others talk fast to you as well.

* He’s like this because he wants to help you in every way he can.

* If you decide to be a hero, despite his warnings. He’s going to help you as much as he can. He’ll ask for help from hero’s who has the same disability as yours if not, he’s going to make a method of teaching you with your other senses.

* He may teach you how to use your sight more, smell, or touch to their full potential.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Iida Tenya

* It honestly hurts him every time he thinks about it, It shouldn’t have been that.

* He was supposed to protect you but he was separated from everyone else. You were with one of the members of Wild Wild Pussycats when Dabi attacked with his crew.

* You and Ragdoll were walking back after discussing your training in the morning when everything became extremely terrifying for you two.

* You and Ragdoll fought your best, almost moving in sync with each other Magne knew how to just send you flying into a tree each time.

* He created a negative force between you and Ragdoll when sent you two flying apart at a harsh force as you went flying into the woods and collided with a huge bolder.

* Blood dripped from your head as Ragdoll’s scream came to your ears while you reached out to help. Your knees touched the marshy land while your hand shook, pain rushing through your body.

* When the message came through, you passed out.

* Tetsutetsu and Itsuka discovered you and carried your body to safety away from all the chaos.

* When it was discovered that you were among the ones injured along with two missing individuals, It sent chills down his spine.

* Since you two just started dating and he was sure you and your parents wanted to spend time with each other, he wouldn’t come to see you in the hospital.

* It takes him over two weeks and when Aizawa needed someone to take his homework to your home. He immediately offered himself because he’s been dying to see you again.

* A jump, kick, and step later, he appeared at your door. You were checking the mail as he called out to you from a few feet away.

* You didn’t notice him and walked towards your home, not noticing his presence yet.

* He was taken back by your casualness while you walked to the door until he saw the hearing aid in your ear.

* That’s when he knows now why you didn’t react and just watches you walk away.

* One thing I do admire about this man, he’ll do anything when it comes to you. While he’s taking his brother to the physical therapy sessions for him.

* He’s learning every single possible way to talk to you. I mean every way.

* As strange as this may sound, he loves signing into your hand even though you’re not blind.

* It’s close contact and he adores that with you. For example, private things or him simply saying he loves you, he’ll sign it into your hand while everything else is out to the open.

* He often recommends to others and his friends that they speak slower with you so you can comprehend or try not to speak all at once.

* If you wish to continue your path to being a hero, he’s going to support you but he can’t help but constantly worry.

* The last time he let you go, you became deaf and he doesn’t want anything else to ever happen to you again. He wants to be your knight in white amour but he knows how you like to be independent too.

* Just don’t give this man a heart attack, please.

[all-my-love-for-harry]

Delicate. — Part 1.

word count: 2.6k

a/n: Here we are fam, i gotta be honest with y’all, this is heavily inspired in the fact that i watched Miss Americana twice this month, what resulted in me going through my taylor swfit phase again. Pls bare with me, i haven’t written anything like this before.

catch up here!

They said artists become what they are because deep down they are as insecure if not more than normal people. Because they craved constant validation in what they do. 

At least it was the case for Y/n. 

A girl who has built an entire system around being accepted by the public, someone who their major source of happiness is provided by strangers all around the world. When you are living from the approval of strangers and that is where you drive all your joy and fulfillment, one bad thing can cause everything to go down. Y/n has spent her whole life trying to please the world so they would like her, so what she has achieved over the years would last. 

When the world turned their back on her, Y/n had no choice but to disappear, because she thought that was what everyone wanted. Even then, she made her choices around what she thought would make them happy.

Y/n knew she could not hide forever, but for now, it was a necessary evil she had to take. Deciding to take a break from everything was the healthiest decision she has ever made, shutting down her social media, getting out of the city and going back home with her family was exactly what she needed. 

"Mom was sad she couldn't pick you up from the airport."

Seventeen-year-old Jensen, whose driving license was still new and fresh, was the one who picked Y/n up when her flight landed. In complete honesty, she did not like using a private plane, but she could not risk someone seeing where she was going. Jensen was good at driving, well, he has not crashed into a tree yet, so they were safe. 

"She would've brought Chase and scare Pandora and Lizzie." 

Jensen chuckled. "She's obsessed with him. I haven't started college yet and she's already thinking about turning my room into Chase's." 

Her parents’ house was a gated property away from others since it was safer that way. Y/n would not stay there the whole time since she had her own apartment a little closer to town. Her luggage, as well as her cats, were picked up separately and taken to her home, she would go there after lunch with her family. Jensen parked next to a black range rover that belonged to their dad, meaning both of their parents were home. 

Y/n threw her backpack over her shoulder as she stepped out of the car, eager to finally reunite with her family, especially her mother. She is in desperate need of a tight hug, a mug of hot chocolate and a shoulder to cry on. Y/n did not realize how mentally drained she was until she saw her mother open the front door. 

"My baby!" Louise exclaimed, embracing her daughter in a tight hug. "How was the flight?" 

"It was fine. I'm starving though." 

They walked into the living room and Louise closed the door behind them. Y/n dropped her backpack on one of the couches and sighed in relief. “Where’s dad?” Jensen went straight to the kitchen and opened the fridge.

“Get the white wine.” Y/n told him.

“It’s too early to drink that.” Louise took the bottle from Jensen’s hands and put it back in the fridge. “Dad’s outside. We bought some roses that will look beautiful by the pool.”

“You’re buying a lot of plants lately.” Y/n pointed a big vase full of daisies, her mom’s favorites, on the kitchen’s island. 

“I like supporting local business.” She shrugged.

“That and she’s obsessed with the owner of the flower shop.” Jensen chuckled, cracking open a water bottle. 

“Hey! That’s not true.” 

“Mom, you there like… every day. Who needs new flowers every day?”

“Shush.” The elder woman faked offense then gigged. “Handsome young man, he is. I’ll take you tomorrow.” She turned to Y/n. 

“Oh, no, mom. I’m going to lock myself in my apartment and try to write.” She said, making Louise scoff. “I’m serious!”

“I know you are. But living like a hermit is not going to do you any good.”

“I agree, sis.” 

Y/n rolled her eyes, knowing they were right as always but did not want to admit it. The truth was, she wanted to write some songs, so badly, but could not find the right words. She was hoping to get some peace and quiet to get her ideas and emotions in order again. Before any of them could say anything else, David entered the kitchen while taking off his gardening gloves and smiled widely when he spotted Y/n.

“And who do we have here?”

“Hi, dad.” Y/n smiled at him brightly before wrapping her arms around her dad, who hugged her back just as tight. 

“Good to have you home, darling.” 

The family of four sat on the kitchen island and started to catch up. Jensen talked about his different college options and how he was considering getting a summer job this year. Louise kept talking about how nice the owner of this flower shop was, making emphasis on how he was also single. Y/n didn’t know what she was trying to do, but she didn’t pay much attention either. 

Overall it was nice for Y/n to get out of her head for a little bit, and her family was always a great help for that. She knew she still had a lot to deal with, and she would probably get a call from her publicist and a lot of other people soon, but for now, she just wanted to think about anything else that wasn't the whole world hating on her. 

"How are you doing, Y/n? Be honest." Her mom asked after they stayed alone in the kitchen.

"Been better." She sighed. "I don't want to think about it, mom."

"You have to talk to someone, sweetie. I know your team cares for you and is trying to handle the situation, but you can still talk to me."

"I know, thank you. I'm just trying to figure it what I'm going to do."

Louise sighed. "You sure you don't want to stay here? You have your room and everything."

"Thanks for the offer, mom. But I sort of want to be on my own." She said. "But I'll come for lunch every day, I promise."

Although Louise wasn't convinced by her daughter's words, she chose to not push it. She knew Y/n had her own ways to express her feelings, and she'd talk whenever she felt like it. So she let her go, making her promise she'd come to visit soon.

"Do you need a ride? I'm going to town anyway." Jensen offered, taking the keys of his car from the little plate they kept on the table beside the front door. 

"Yes, please."

The drive to her apartment wasn't a long one, and in less than ten minutes she was opening her front door and being greeted by her two beautiful cats rubbing themselves on her legs. Y/n sighed, thinking about how much she needed to unpack now that she was here. The truth was, she didn't know for how long she'd be staying here, but she figured it'd be a long time so she packed a lot. Now she kind of regretted it because she would probably be in her pajamas all day anyway. 

After cleaning Pandora and Lizzie's sandbox, Y/n decided to grab an acoustic guitar and try to come up with some melodies. She wasn't quite sure about any lyrics yet, but it was always good to have a little something to start a song. 

She went from playing the guitar to play the piano, hoping she'd get more inspirations somewhere. But she had nothing. Not even one decent note. She was empty. 

"Don't pretend is... mhmm. Think about the... No." She groaned and slammed the palm of her hands on the keyboard, growing frustrated. Why all of a sudden she couldn't even rhyme? Maybe she needed a break, or perhaps she was tired from her flight and tomorrow she'd be able to write something.

//

Turns out her writer's block was here to stay. A week has passed since her arrival and Y/n hasn't been able to finish one single song. Everything she started ended up being erased or in the middle of her living room after the ripped the page off her journal. 

"I told you, you shouldn't hurry. Inspiration will come eventually, it always does."

"I guess. I just have nothing else to do other than play scrabble with you and write songs, or at least try to."

"Let me take out then." Louise started and Y/n shakes her head. "C'mon, let's eat somewhere or buy groceries and I'll cock at your place." Y/n looked at her mom and realized she wouldn't stop until she accepted, so Y/n offered Louise a nod. "Marvelous. There's this little café that I absolutely love. You'll love the owner."

"What is it with you and the owners of local shops?"

"They're my friends. Oh! We could drop by Blossom House. You could use some flowers around your house so it would look like somebody actually lives there."

"Stop dragging me, woman."

Louise drove them to this café called Furry Cakes, which turned out to be a cat café. Y/n obviously lost it as soon as they walked in, and nearly cried when she saw all the kittens, and absolutely shed a tear when the girl behind the register said every kitty except for one named Chaster was up for adoption. She felt like a little girl all over again when her mom told her she couldn't take every single kitty home. 

Y/n was wearing a hoodie that was twice her size, plus some big sunglasses she refused to take off, even inside of the café. She was praying she wouldn't get recognized as she knew people were dying for a picture of her, see how she was after the entire world canceled her. 

"We'll leave the car parked here, the flower shop is just around the corner." Louise pulled from Y/n's hand to make her walk faster. There weren't a lot of people on the streets and she was grateful for that, she hasn't gotten a proper walk in what felt like ages. 

They stopped outside a modern-looking building with a big, bright sign that read 'The Blossom House'. It was simple yet cute. The pair stepped in and a little bell ringed. Y/n looked around, admiring how everything looked like it was straight out of a fairytale. There were little pots hanging from the ceiling and she looked up, she saw the ceiling was pure glass, which made the whole place brighter. Flowers weren't really her thing as she could barely keep them alive, but seeing this amount of flowers all in the same place... made her somewhat happy and warm inside. 

She was so deep in thought she didn't even realize her mom left her and was nowhere to be found. It doesn't look like it from outside, but the shop was actually big and very spacious. It was also empty right now, not even an employee was around, so she decided to have a look on her own. It looked like they had all kinds of flowers in here, which made her even more excited because that meant they had-

"Azaleas? They're also my favorites." A deep voice interrupted her thoughts. She jumped on her place as she wasn't expecting it, which made the person behind her chuckle. "I didn't mean to scare you, sorry."

"It's okay..." She turned around and it was fair to say that was she saw stunned her right away.

In front of her, a gorgeous looking man was standing there with a bright smile on his face. She noticed the two dimples poking at each side of his face, making his smile even more beautiful. His emerald green eyes were the greenest eyes she has ever seen in her life, she believed. He had crinkles by his eyes due to his smile being wide. But to her, the icing of the cake was the beautiful mop of chocolate curls he had on the top of his head. She suddenly felt the insane urge to run her hands through it just to see if they were as soft as they looked. 

"Harry, darling!" Louise appeared out of nowhere and wrapped her arms around the man, who only chuckled while reciprocating the greeting.

"Hello, Louise. What's it gonna be today? Tulips? More daisies?" Oh God, he's British. Y/n thought to herself. 

"Gosh, you know me so well. I'm actually here just to look around, I see you found my daughter though." She smirked.

"I surely did. I'm Harry, nice to meet you, love." He offered her a hand for her to shake.

Y/n was a little surprised by the pet name but took his hand nonetheless. "I'm Y/n, nice to meet you too."

"I want her to get some plants for her house." Louise spoke again.

"Well, you're in the right place then." He said. "Do you want them for your garden?"

"No, uhm... I don't have one. I live in an apartment."

"Personally, my favorite to keep indoors are Begonias." Harry guided the two women to a different section of the flower shop and pointed to some pretty ones in pink color. "But I also enjoy Daylilies, although they're a little harder to maintain."

"Yeah, maybe not those then. I'm not very good at keeping plants alive."

"She killed a cactus once." Louise mentioned. 

"No way." 

"I didn't know they'd drown if I watered them more than once a week!" Y/n defended herself. 

"Amateur mistake." He joked. 

The truth was Y/n was too busy to have a garden, she was always traveling and didn't stay too long in one place so even if she tries to have one, it'd be dead by the end of the month. 

"What plants are cat friendly? I have two at home."

"Bromeliads are cat friendly, they're easy to maintain too."

They looked around for a little bit. Harry said a fun fact about every type of flower Y/n pointed out, never failing to make her laugh. The funny thing was, it didn't look like Harry knew who she was. Either he hasn't recognized her, or he didn't know about her. Which by the way, not to be a narcissist, would be highly unlikely.

She ended up taking a couple of new plants home, starting to grow excited about them. It was true, her apartment could use a little more life to it, and now she was sure her new plants would do that for her. Harry was wrapping everything for them while he stood behind the counter.

"Oh, here. This one's on the house." Harry handed her a pot with some beautiful blue Azaleas. She took them with a growing blush on her face, a blush that went deeper when their hands brushed with each other. "Try to not kill them though." He teased.

Y/n rolled her eyes as her mom chuckled behind her. "I'll report their aliveness back to you, you'll see."

"You better. Have a nice day, ladies. I'm guessing I'll see you around, Y/n?"

"Sure, I'm uh... I'm living here right now."

Harry smiled at them one last time before they exited the shop. After the door closed behind them, Louise turned to Y/n. "He likes you."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"What do you say if we invite him for dinner sometime?"

"Like, at your house?" She asked surprised.

"Yeah, why not?"

"I have to keep a low profile, mother. For all I know he could be tweeting about I just exited his shop."

"Don't let the paranoia ruin the possibility of forming new friendships... or more." Louise sent her a wink.

"Okay, that's enough."

Y/n brushed her off, trying not to think much about it. A new friendship sounded impossible at this point of her life, let alone pursuing a new relationship with someone. She had made up her mind, she was better off being alone.