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lgbtyrus · 4 years ago

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Definitely

A Tarty fanfic? In October of 2020? You bet!!! This is a gift for @delicatesleeper who deserves the world’s most patient person award <3 Enjoy!

Words: 3068

High school was fun because you saw a lot of different things. Kids chanting Lick it! Lick it! to another kid going to lick a weird stain in the science building. An artsy kid having a break down in the middle of math. TJ Kippen fighting another boy in the locker room.

“TJ is fighting Carson!” Marty’s best friend, Tony, announced to him in one corner of the locker room. There was dozens of voices echoing throughout the stuffy place, and Marty could feel his heart slam against his chest every step he took towards the scene. But by the time he got there, their PE teacher had already separated the two. TJ seemed to get in a good hit as Carson hid his blood nose under his arm, not realizing blood was already dripping down at his chin.

“What in the fucking hell were you two thinking?!” their PE teacher’s voice boomed over them. “You��re both going to get kicked off the basketball team.”

“He started it!” TJ yelled, looking furious. His face was read. Marty didn’t know TJ that well, but he knew he wasn’t violent. Sure, he had a temper. But dating Cyrus Goodman for a while had to have done something good to him. Then again, break ups completely reprogram a person. Marty would know. He’s been through five.

Marty was sitting in detention, leaning back on his chair, balancing a pencil on his nose. It was him and the other kids who were regularly in there. Marty tried not to get detention so much he got kicked off the track team, but he also didn’t like doing his homework.

The teacher who looked over detention wasn’t in the classroom yet, so everyone in there was just talking and scrolling through their phones. They only looked up when someone came in, but it was usually someone they all recognized or knew pretty well.

Then TJ Kippen walked in and the pencil fell into his hand. Marty watched him walk inside the badly lit classroom, look around, and sit in the desk next to him before realizing he hadn’t stopped staring. TJ raised an eyebrow at him, making Marty panic and look away, pretending his pencil was the most interesting thing. He felt like if slightly turning his head would kill him.

Mr. Rosas walked in, whistling with a book and paper under his arm like usual. “Alright, people. Phones away. You can take them out after thirty minutes of homework.” He went to the front and put his book at the empty desk for whoever was overlooking detention. The room was in a trailer lot in the corner of their school, and it was hard to find if you never got in trouble. Mr. Rosas started reading the names of the roster, some kids saying here, some kids being recognized by him.

“TJ Kippen?” Mr. Rosas looked up. Marty turned his head and saw that TJ raised his hand. He had a heavy frown on his lips. “Aren’t you in basketball?”

“Not anymore.” TJ sighed, leaning back into his chair.

“Oh. You’re one of those two basketball players from today, no?” Mr. Rosas asked him. TJ nodded, looking embarrassed that everyone knew. Marty had been hearing everyone talking about TJ and Carson all day long, and it was making him really curious to know what happened. Nobody knows what happened. The two went inside the locker rooms laughing and then TJ threw the first hit.

Mr. Rosas finished taking attendance, and Marty realized that Carson wasn’t there. That usually meant an extra two days of detention. Marty forced himself to stop thinking about TJ and Carson and pulled out his algebra homework. Some kids were chatting with their work out on their desks, and Mr. Rosas didn’t seem to mind. He was in a good mood that day which basically meant they could do whatever they wanted. He said he always had a soft spot for misfits because he basically lived in detention in high school but had a good director that helped him get into college.

“Hey, Marty,” someone called out. Marty turned around the room, looking for the voice. “Right here, dude.” Marty made eye contact with TJ who was holding up a piece of paper. It was their homework. “Can you show me how to do four?” Marty looked at him, in shock for a bit. “Your name is Marty, right?”

“Um, yeah,” Marty said. He cleared his throat and looked down at his homework, trying to remember his steps while a storm brewed in his brain. “I dated Buffy freshman year.” Really? That’s what you say? Dumbass.

“I know who you are.” TJ told him. Marty didn’t know how to reprogram himself to work, but he cleared his throat again and held up his math sheet to him.

“Let me walk you through it.”

TJ only needed help on two other problems after that, and Marty gladly helped him even when he was done with his homework. His moms had gotten mad at him for not taking AP classes, but he didn’t like to be challenged in academics. They weren’t interesting enough.

Mr. Rosas stood up and shut his book. “All right everyone, you’re dismissed for the day. Don’t come back.” Without hesitation, everyone scrambled out of their seats and made their way out of the classroom in a line. Marty’s track practice started at 4:30 because his coach knew a lot of the kids on the team had a knack for getting kept for detention or they had other clubs besides sports. Marty just had detention.

He made his way towards the locker rooms by the gym and track field, and after walking for a moment, he noticed TJ was right behind him. Marty decided against walking faster and instead met up with TJ who gave him a head nod in acknowledgment. “Where are you of to?” Marty asked him.

“I’m not sure. I’ve never left school this early.”

“You should go to Rita Donuts. She has student discounts on Wednesdays.”

“Good to know.”

“So,” Marty said. He cleared his throat. He didn’t know how else to keep the conversation going. “What happened in the locker room.”

“What have you heard?” TJ asked him.

“Honestly, everything.” Marty crossed his arms, walking a little closer to TJ who was now heading towards the school gates, opposite of the locker rooms. Instead of saying anything, Marty continued to walk besides him.

“He said something homophobic. I punched him. That’s that.” Marty couldn’t figure TJ out. He was stoic and saying everything like he hadn’t just gotten kicked off the basketball team- the one he was captain of as a junior.

“What?” Marty asked. He had heard many things except that. Something like that wasn’t even a possibility at their high school. “And you’re both off the team?”

“He’s suspended and maybe expelled. I just got off the team because of the no tolerance policy. They said they’ll make sure I can play next year, though.”

“Well, I guess that’s kind of good?” Marty said, still not understanding how the school worked.

“Yeah. Honestly, it’s fine,” TJ admitted to him. “I can focus on actually getting good grades for now. I’m scared I’m not going to pass algebra.”

“I can tutor you,” Marty said without second thought.

“Really?” TJ smiled at him. Marty blushed crimson and nodded dumbfoundedly. “Thanks. I have you on Snapchat, no?”

“Yeah,” Marty nodded again. He couldn’t say much of anything else. He wasn’t even that good at math.

“Cool. I’ll hit you up,” TJ told him.

“Yeah,” Marty said. He looked at the time on his phone. “I’m gonna head to practice now. See you.”

“Later.” Marty smiled at him once more and ran towards the gym with his heart slamming against him like he wasn’t a trained runner. Math just got interesting.

Marty didn’t know what he was doing, why he was nervous, or why he even had a brain if it wasn’t going to work and save him from humiliating situations. TJ was going over to his house on Saturday to get help for their test on Monday, and Marty wasn’t exactly a wizard. He got in his shower after his six mile run from that morning and dressed in eight different things until deciding to wear a track shirt and jeans.

He didn’t have time to do his hair when his mom called from downstairs that TJ was there. He slid across the second floor in his socks and ran downstairs, TJ waiting for him at the door. He was smiling and talking to his mom, wearing a plain white shirt, basketball shorts, and slides. Marty definitely felt overdressed.

“Hey,” Marty waved at him.

“Hey,” TJ said, bringing his backpack higher on his shoulder.

“You can wait in the dining room,” Marty said, pointing at the entryway. “I need to get my backpack.” TJ gave him a thumbs up and walked over as Marty ran back upstairs, his heartrate a complete mess even when he ran back down.

“Do you run everywhere?” TJ asked him when he sat down in the chair next to him. Marty nodded, taking in counted breaths.

“It’s faster. You should try it.”

“Maybe when I’m back in shape.”

Marty stifled a full laugh. “You’ve only been out of basketball for like four days.”

“I breathe hard when I go up the stairs now. Four days was all I needed.”

“I run at least six miles every.”

“You’re addicted to track.”

“Sounds about right,” Marty smiled. He took out his binder and homework.

He didn’t know how he did it, but he got TJ through the course work and got him ready for the test. Marty had never studied that much on his own before since math was just a regular subject to him. Studying with TJ was fun, though. Whenever he tried to study with Tony, they ended up messing around and playing video games because they got bored.

But everything about TJ kept him grounded, like he was scared he would miss years of his life if he looked away for even just a second. It was too much for Marty to try to process sometimes, and he often tried to rub the heat away from his cheeks.

Marty and TJ hung out more outside of tutoring. TJ had a lot of time on his hands, and his friends were still going to basketball games so Marty would invite him to hang out with Tony and a few other boys. Tony raised his eyebrow one time when Marty was sad TJ wouldn’t make it to bowling, but when Marty asked him what, Tony just laughed and shook his head. That’s how Marty knew he was fucked.

TJ was in that stage months post breakup where he wasn’t gloomy about it anymore and he was back to functioning like normal again, but you could tell he had put a barrier up. There were times when TJ would almost talk about his home life or his family or even how he felt about certain things, but there always something blocking him. Like if he remembered he would only talk about those certain things to a certain someone who broke his heart.

Marty approached TJ with as much caution as much as he threw himself at him. He felt delusional and crazy, but there were times he felt like TJ was starting to like him, too. The proximity in which they would walk side by side seemed to close in even closer every week, and Marty wasn’t the one inching next to him. But even though they were becoming good friends, Marty knew there was going to be a lot more walls to break down.

One day at the park, Marty broke down the first obstacle and asked TJ why him and Cyrus had broken up. “We just didn’t click anymore,” TJ said. “He broke up with me, and I just said ok.” Marty watched TJ fiddle with the basketball in his hand for a moment, about to speak up before TJ started talking again. “I wish I would’ve asked him to stay, though. But… I could tell that he just didn’t want me anymore.” Marty didn’t know what to do with that, so he just patted TJ on the back.

“Sorry, bud.”

“That’s just the way it is.” TJ threw the ball at Marty, and they got up for another game. The entire time Marty wondered if TJ would go back to Cyrus if he could.

Marty figured he had nothing to lose and asked, “Are you over him?” In that moment, TJ stood still with the basketball in his hands. He stared at Marty, making his breath hitch for a second as those green eyes looked for something. “Yeah. I basically am.”

Basically. Basically am. What does that mean? Marty asked himself that over and over that night, and it was starting to drive him insane. So much, he just gave in and called Tony at one in the morning.

Tony was half-asleep when he answered. “Hello?”

“Okay,” Marty jumped right into it, “you know how I like TJ right?” There was a few seconds of silence.

“Yes.”

“So, I asked him if he was over Cyrus, and he said he basically was. What does basically mean? Like he doesn’t want to say he is because he’s lying or he is in the process of fully forgetting him?”

“Um.” Tony yawned into the mic, hurting Marty’s ear with the buzz. “Both?”

“Tony that’s not helping.”

“Dude just tell him you like him.”

“I can’t do that.” Marty’s head was filling with air at just the thought of doing that. “It’d just ruin our friendship.”

“Hmm, I don’t know, man.” Marty knew that tone.

“What do you know?”

“What do you mean?” Tony repeated back. He was cornered.

“What are you keeping from me?”

“Nothing,” Tony’s voice got louder which meant he was lying.

“Just tell me and you can go to sleep.” Marty heard Tony sigh. It didn’t take that long to get him to crack. “He told one of the guys who told me that he thinks you’re… cute.”

“Cute?” Marty didn’t know what to do with the information.

“Yeah. Goodnight.” Marty didn’t even get to say it back as Tony hung up, leaving Marty with the most explosive words he could’ve left him with.

TJ always asked Marty to hang out before he had gotten the cute bomb dropped on him, so Marty told himself not to act any different or to pick apart every little thing TJ did like a fetal pig. Doing so was starting to give him a heartache. But when him and TJ were doing homework in Marty’s kitchen, there was just too much gut to not pick at.

TJ had lightly bumped his foot into Marty’s and then just kept it there. He told Marty he had nice handwriting (a lot of people told him that, though). He told Marty his hair looked nice, and Marty didn’t know how to react so he just ran his fingers through his hair and accidentally ruined it so TJ could jokingly say never mind. And at one point, TJ took the ring he had on his hand and slipped it on Marty’s finger, his race redder than it had ever been. TJ noticed it.

“Why is your face so red?” TJ asked, still holding Marty’s hand on the table. Marty looked between TJ’s face that held a sneaky smile and their fingers that were grazing on each other.

Marty hid his face with his free hand and said, “I think it’s just allergies.” Dumbass! Dumb! Dumb! Dumb boy. Allergies?!

TJ chuckled and pulled his hand back slightly. “I didn’t know allergies did that.”

“Yeah,” Marty tapped his ringed hand on the table. “My moms say the doctors don’t know what to do with me.”

TJ looked Marty in the eye as he whispered, “I don’t know what to do, either.” Marty looked at TJ with his eyebrow raised. It was his turn to make him spazz out.

“Are you trying to kill me?”

TJ raised an eyebrow, a smile twitching on his face. “What kind of doctors are you doing to?”

“I think they’re vampires. It works out so I don’t have to miss track practice during the day.” TJ rolled his eyes but not in a rude way. In a you’re not that funny way. But he was still smiling warmly. Marty looked at TJ, realizing how close he had him and how his green eyes were just diamonds on his face. His face was full of sharp features, and he wanted to run his finger on all of them. He reached out and touched TJ’s hand again, making him look at him with wide eyes. Marty was about to retreat his hand, when TJ grasped it, fully holding it and tapping on of his fingers on his ring.

“Do you like me?” TJ asked him. Okay so this is happening now!

“What do you think?” Marty said, showing him their hands. TJ laughed a little.

“I think you do,” TJ said quietly, looking at him with a small smile.

“I know you think I’m cute,” Marty couldn’t help but say. “A little birdy told me.”

TJ had a victorious look on his face. “I knew those two would snitch. I planned it out like that.”

“What?” Marty asked. “You told someone you thought I was cute so that they would tell Tony to tell me?” They both laughed after Marty tried to piece it together in the air.

“I don’t know how Tony got involved, but yeah. Something like that.”

“Why not just tell me?”

“Just in case you didn’t like me.” TJ shrugged. “Can’t really know if someone really wants you despite their words and actions that say they do.” Marty’s heart seemed to sigh as he realized what TJ was talking about. Marty stood up and go closer to TJ, leaning down to kiss him. TJ kissed him back, his hand squeezing his harder.

Marty pulled away and pressed his forehead against TJ’s, their eyes in each other’s worlds. “Well I definitely like you. A lot. And if you’re willing to, I’d like to take you out sometime.” TJ gave him a small kiss.

“I’d like that.”

#shoosh star #stars writing #andi mack #tarty #tj kippen #Marty from the party

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multimetaverse · 4 years ago

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Jamie Johnson 5x05 Review

If you were a fan of Andi Mack or Doafp you should check out the pretty great British show Jamie Johnson which just launched a coming out story line for one of its main characters and covers a bunch of other important issues. Let’s dig in!

My reviews will feature spoilers from throughout the series and if you’d like to watch the story from the start there are only 3 eps in the 1st season, 10 in the 2nd and 3rd, and 13 in the 4th and 5th with casting and writing already underway for a 6th season. All the eps are available on the CBBC website if you live in Britain or have a VPN. You can also contact @tkstrand for access to the eps (just don’t tell Scotland Yard). A big thanks to Mike for introducing me and so many others to Jamie Johnson and single-handedly starting the fandom. I highly recommend watching all the eps from the start; Jamie Johnson is a very charming show that tackles a lot of important issues in the guise of being a show about soccer and the show has gotten better each season and the writing shows no signs of stalling or declining. The acting does start off really rough in S1 but has improved markedly and some of the actors are very talented though overall the acting is closer in quality to a show like GMW or No Good Nick than Andi Mack or Doafp. In fairness, a big reason for that is that the show has to spend so much time on soccer games and practices and the kids are actually pretty good players; so good in fact that for S4 the actors actually entered the 2018 Gothia cup in Sweden and did extremely well. Jamie Johnson is in many ways a British Andi Mack but with a British Gary Marsh who is much less of a censoring shithead and a British Terri Minsky and crew who are better and more consistent writers

Tonight was a big night for reformed bully and star soccer player Dillon Simmonds. He’s the closest analogue to TJ Kippen the show has though unlike TJ he’s a main character and has been in the show right from the pilot; in some eps he even gets the 2nd credit after Jamie. 5x05 was in many ways a callback to 4x05 which was the first ep that had subtext for gay Dillon. 4x05 also introduced most of the characters who will play a big role in Dillon’s coming out story line: Ruby Osborne, her biological sister Alba, her foster moms who are a married lesbian couple, Dillon’s younger brother Liam, and Dillon’s father. S4 is really when Dillon Simmonds becomes a hashtag good boy and his arc is focused on him getting out from his Father’s incessant pressure to go pro though there is some delicious gay subtext in eps 4x11-13

The show’s always been good at setting up plot points in advance, like Dillon’s diabetes, Wozza’s ADHD, and Duncan Jones’ shadyness, but those plots were set up and then addressed all in the same season. I don’t think it’s that surprising that the gay story line is the exception. It’s very likely that the writers didn’t intend Dillon to be gay until they set out to write S4 and they likely didn’t have full permission to go ahead with it until S5. It’s also likely that their original plan for exploring Dillon’s sexuality was going to involve Ruby trying to act on her crush on Dillon; 4x13 set that up and then in 5x01 Ruby tells Zoe out of nowhere that she’s over Dillon and only sees him as a brother and wouldn’t you know it, she doesn’t even think Dillon looks at girls in a romantic way!

Thankfully the show is going in a much better direction with the introduction of Elliot. He’s already been fleshed out with a personality and hobbies like astronomy and magic (for his next trick he’s going to make Dillon’s heterosexuality disappear). I was shocked at how flirty the Delliot scenes this ep were, not just because they were gay scenes but also because the show really has not had these kind of scenes before for any of the straight characters either. Even Jamie hasn’t had more than pretty clear hints that he likes Jack and wants to be with her. I don’t know if it’s because the show is targeted towards an audience of young men or if there’s a cultural difference across the pond but there’s consistently been very little romance of any kind throughout the series. If this had been an American series, there’s no way that Jamie wouldn’t have had at least one girl he went on a date with or something, even if it was only a brief thing. It’s refreshing in some ways and it means that the show has to look elsewhere for drama and angst

Dillon is obviously drawn to Elliot and thinks he’s cool but he has quite the reaction when he learns that Elliot is gay. He runs to tell Ruby that she needs to cut it out with Elliot because he’s gay which is clumsy writing because Zoe had just told him that Ruby told her that Elliot is not in fact her new boyfriend but is her new gay foster brother. They obviously needed to show Dillon’s strong reaction to the news but also needed a way to come off as kind of homophobic but my own theory is that Dillon wanted to make sure Ruby didn’t waste her time pursuing a gay guy like Sienna Jones had wasted her time trying to pursue Dillon in S4. As the show hasn’t really focused much on romance I’m not expecting much to come of Delliot especially since they have a built in escape hatch with Elliot only being in care until his mom is out of hospital but I am looking forward to what happens with them this season and what will happen with Dillon in the remaining seasons this show has

I think this was the least that Jamie has been in any ep. One thing I really like about this show is that they’re not afraid to have main characters miss an ep or two unlike American shows that usually have to have mains appear in every ep even if there’s no actual story for them. From the S5 trailer it looks like Jamie will get really into e-gaming while his broken leg heals after he was accidentally run over on his 16th birthday by his deadbeat dad Ian Reacher. I would assume that Jamie eventually gets back into real soccer but it does promise a lot of drama between Jamie and grandpa Mike who has always been Jamie’s staunchest supporter

Duncan ‘’Big Dunk’’ Jones, former pro soccer player turned silver fox and head of Phoenix FC, took a big step forward in redeeming himself for trying to scuttle Jamie’s career with Hawkstone by appointing Jamie’s mom Karen as the new head of wellness which fits with the CBBC announcement that S5 would in part focus on mental health

Alba once again lost her cool during a game. It’s clear that a lot of her anger issues stem from feelings of abandonment as well as the constant uncertainty and rapid changes she’s experienced as a foster child. The show has always been good at showing how what’s going on with the children in their home lives affects them at school and on the pitch, like Jamie acting out because of his dad walking out on the family and Dillon being a bully to try and fit into the role his dad wants him to play. It’s very interesting that they’re now bringing back Liam Simmonds to begin his redemption arc as he was the first to make Alba lose her cool by attacking her foster moms at his father’s instigation way back in 4x05

To the show’s credit, they’ve always been firm in showing how awful bullying and homophobia are and all the soccer teams in the series have shown a zero tolerance policy for it. It’s a different world in many ways from North America, I couldn’t imagine an American show about football or even a Canadian show about Hockey that would plausibly show a zero tolerance policy for bullying and homophobia

Looking Ahead:

Next ep features Liam’s return to Phoenix FC after Alba accepts his apology for his homophobia. His redemption arc will be interesting to watch especially as it;s certain to tie in to Dillon having to face up to his father who is the avatar of toxic masculinity and homophobia. Perhaps it will take Liam defending his brother to make his father see the errors of his ways

Not sure who will take over coaching the U14′s now that Mike has said he’ll be stepping aside

Zoe faces another talented black player who she clearly does not respond well to. Zoe has always been hyper competitive and worried about losing her place to another female player which in part stems from the stress she’s under as her ill mothers primary carer. Good for Zoe for getting through to Howard Royle about Hawkstone lacking a women’s team

5x07 looks like it will be a huge ep for Dillon and Delliot and it seems likely that Dillon will snap after realizing that Ruby and Elliot think he’s homophobic and will come out to Elliot. Should be good

Until next week Jamie Johnsoner’s

#Jamie Johnson #Dillon Simmonds #Delliot #Andi Mack #Doafp #Elliot #Ruby Osborne #Alba Osborne #Mike Johnson #Jamie Johnson Reviews

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tyruscrack · 3 years ago

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Amber Kippen - Inspired by Dodie

please gimme those sweet sweet validation crumbs this took 3 days

and no its not the old lesbian flag its a color palatte based on her shirt

#andi mack #tyrus #cyrus goodman #tj kippen #tj x cyrus #ambi #renew andi mack #i miss andi mack #memes #buffy driscoll #this is the only visual art im capable of #digital aritst #art #amber andi mack #amber kippen #andimackart

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supergraphicultramoderngirl · 5 years ago

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i don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you

summary: cyrus and tj are childhood best friends. tj’s there for him when cyrus comes out to his family and it doesn’t go well, he watches him grow up and be proud of who he is, and he may or may not fall in love in the process. the only issue is, he’s not nearly as proud of himself as cyrus is. and yeah, cyrus is always gonna be there for tj, but now, a recent college grad, he’s done hiding. will they make it out together?

word count: 6.2K

(hey so i kinda accidentally deleted the whole thing and lost all of my formatting so other than the major flashbacks the previously italicized things aren’t anymore and it bugs me too but just like,, deal with it)

taglist: @citrus-thelonious @heart-eyes-kippen @danceacademys @kippenmittens @vi-the-best-you-can @tjskipping @simplycyrus @luzawithoutu @lizzybeth-eleventyseven @green-lemonboys @oblivioustj @theobligatedklutz @nineteenohtwo @theconfusedravenclaw @i-swear-its-just-me @bambiandambi @isisisak @fallout-of-my-chair

“TJ?” Cyrus’ voice shook, cracking from the tears, but whispered from fear of his parents overhearing.

TJ may have been asleep before, but he sure as hell wasn’t now, hearing that tone in his best friend’s voice. “Cyrus? What’s wrong?”

His tone remained hushed, even less stable than before, “Can I stay over at your house tonight?”

TJ glanced over at his clock. 2:38am. Why now?

“Please,” Cyrus choked out.

TJ didn’t even hesitate in answering, “Of course. Come in through my window, okay?”

Not even ten minutes later, Cyrus crawled through the window and stood for a moment before body racking sobs erupted from him. It was painful to watch, and TJ wanted to burn alive whatever could’ve possibly made him feel that way. He didn’t deserve that. He never could.

Cyrus collapsed into TJ, who gripped him like he was falling off the edge of the earth. He knew for a fact then that he would always be there to catch him.

But Cyrus was gone before TJ woke up that morning.

———

“Hey,” TJ caught up to Cyrus while walking in the hallway towards their history class. To say that he was scared for his friend after what happened the night before was an understatement. “Are you okay?”

Cyrus laughed incredulously, “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” He hoisted his textbooks closer to his chest.

TJ furrowed his brows. “Last ni—“

“I don’t want to talk about it.” The look on his face was something terrifying. His lips were pressed into a tight smile, but his eyes told three stories at once. They told him to shut up, they told him he was angrier than TJ had ever seen him, they told him that he was still aching, still crushed from whatever happened.

“Okay,” TJ spoke slowly, “but you know I’ll always be here for you, right? No matter what’s going on?”

Cyrus’ hard visage almost melted for a second, like he wanted to cave in so badly, but after a flicker of fear sparked in his eyes, he shifted his gaze to his feet and continued walking.

“Yeah. I know.”

———

“What do you mean you’re ‘not gay anymore’? That isn’t exactly something you can just switch on and off, you know,” Buffy retorted, bewildered by the words coming out of her best friend’s mouth. Andi sat beside her, equally surprised and confused.

“I mean, I’m not gay anymore. It was a mistake, I probably just judged my feelings wrong or something,” Cyrus mumbled, then sighed, straightening up in his seat. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore, alright?”

“Too bad, because something obviously happened if you went from total heart eyes with Jonah and TJ and running away after kissing Iris to suddenly being straight, so spill,” Buffy pushed back, trying to make sense of her friend’s behavior.

Andi leaned forward, taking his hands in hers. “Look, Cyrus, you don’t have to tell us anything, but we’re here for you no matter what, okay? We’re always gonna be here for you.”

His eyes grew misty despite not losing their closed-off demeanor, and he threw them a watery smile. “Thanks. I...” he trailed off. “I want to tell you, but I can’t. I want to tell you so badly, you know.” He stood up then, grabbing his coat. “I’m just gonna take off and head home,” he paused, “see you guys later.”

Andi and Buffy shared a worried look, shoving their baby taters away from them a bit.

They lost their appetite.

———

Sophomore year just began, and yet TJ was swamped with homework already, which became his primary focus on his walk home from school. This explains why he ran directly into someone while trying to think through his schedule, and how the hell he was possibly going to handle math this year.

TJ quickly moved to apologize, “Oh, sorry— Cyrus? Hey, what’re you doing?”

Cyrus gave him a tight-lipped smile. It’d been two years since they last talked, two years and a little bit more since that night. “I’m on my way to Andi’s,” he explained.

TJ looked down, squinting. “With two suitcases and a duffel bag?”

Cyrus nodded, yanking his jacket to cover his torso more. “Yep.”

TJ grew even more obviously concerned. “Is everything alright?”

Cyrus closed his eyes and took a terse sigh. “Everything is fine, TJ. Mind your business, please.” He shoved past the taller boy, making his way to, presumably, Andi’s house.

•••

“For two years, I’ve let you all do this to me. I’ve tried to be the mediator, I’ve tried to repress it all, but for god’s sakes, you’re all the therapists here! This is your job! Not only as a therapist, but as a parent, you should support and be there for your kids!” He took a sigh. “This is not just something I’m confused about, alright? This is a part of me that I’ve known for years, and a part of me that I’ve had for even longer. You don’t get to choose what parts of me you want around, you get all of me, or none at all. Take your pick.”

His mother closed her eyes, while the other three adults stared at him with disdain and pity, something you should never be getting from your fucking parents. “If you’re going to choose to continue living this way, then I guess we’re forced to say none at all, Cyrus.”

Cyrus’ hand shook as he pointed at her. “You are not forced in this situation, Mom. You are the one making a choice, not me.”

“Just make this easier on everyone and start packing your things,” his father interjected.

Cyrus did so, body-racking sobs overtaking him all the meanwhile, reminding him of the first time he’d tried to bring this up around them, the last time he had his rock still around.

The four adults watched him leave, they watched as he stopped himself in the doorway and turned back to say to them. “If you really think I’m going to hell, I’ll see you all there.”

The door slammed shut, and yet it was the most silent moment that house had ever had.

•••

Two weeks after their run-in, TJ spots Cyrus waltzing into school with a pride pin adorning his typical polo shirt.

Cyrus may have been proud of himself, but TJ was almost prouder.

———

The first time Cyrus got a boyfriend was when TJ really noticed it. The weird aching yet stabbing feeling in his chest, that wait, something is wrong here feeling.

That green-eyed monster feeling.

Had TJ thought it was weird he’d never really gotten a crush before while all of his friends would talk about girls all the time? No, maybe he was just a late bloomer, he presumed. Did he feel off whenever one of his teammates comments on how hot a girl is and he can’t bring himself to understand why he thinks that? No, he probably just didn’t think that specific girl was cute. Right?

Did TJ notice a weird fluttery feeling, a swoop in his stomach, something his friends only associated with their girlfriends, every time he saw Cyrus as of late? Hell yeah, he did.

And it was terrifying.

When Cyrus got a boyfriend, it made it even worse. Especially when everyone kept saying that they were shoe-ins for homecoming royalty, and that they would be the two to make it all the way past college, that they were perfect for each other. Especially since this was the period of time that Cyrus chose to become better friends with TJ again, because he “missed his company”.

Yeah, okay, guess he’ll just deal with it then. Right?

———

The universe was now obviously out to get him. That had to be it.

Two more years passed, TJ’s crush didn’t let up, and neither did his guard. He remained heavily in the closet, and was prepared to stay there for potentially the rest of his life. It’s not like people wouldn’t support him, I mean, there’s only two homophobic assholes at their school and TJ could definitely handle them, plus, his mom seemed pretty open-minded with things. The whole concept to him was just terrifying. Too many layers of different.

Anyways, two years passed, and TJ received a text from his best friend that would either ruin or save his life.

Him and Cyrus got into the same college. Cyrus’ boyfriend did not.

The universe had to be fucking with him, at this point, like come on.

———

TJ’s night before graduation was surprisingly filled with pints of ice cream and cheesy romcoms that were easy to make fun of.

Oh yeah, Cyrus’ boyfriend broke up with him that day, something about not wanting to deal with an LDR, and that he wasn’t expecting it to last, anyway. Naturally, TJ stepped in to his role as best friend and offered a place for him to sleepover.

After Cyrus threw popcorn at the screen in anger for the third time that night, he huffed and grabbed the remote to pause the movie. “I’m over this. I can’t watch this anymore. It’s unrealistic.” He looked over to TJ, who was already looking back at him. He always was, wasn’t he? “You know what I’m talking about, right?”

TJ shrugged. “I wouldn’t know, I’ve never been in a relationship,” he pointed out.

Cyrus sat in thought for a moment, drying tear stains shining from the glow of the TV. “Oh, wait, wow, you’ve never been in a relationship. Why the hell have you never been in a relationship?”

“I... don’t know,” he replied, but as he looked at the boy in front of him, he realized he knew exactly why.

It had always been him.

•••

A small brunette boy walked up behind the sandbox timidly. He asked with a small voice, “Can I help you make sandcastles?”

The blonde boy already sitting in the box, knees already covered in sand, turned around to see the other boy. “Yeah, of course! Do you wanna make the moat?”

The brunette boy nodded and knelt down to play with the blonde. From a distance, some of the blonde’s friends pointed and laughed. “Look, Kippen’s playing with the baby!”

As the brunette’s face dropped, the blonde knew then that he would make sure he never felt sad like that. He turned to look at the boy and said, “Don’t listen to them, they don’t know what they’re saying. They’re just a bunch of butts.”

The brunette laughed, and the blonde already loved the sound. “I’m TJ.”

“I know.” The brunette threw him a small smile. “Cyrus.”

•••

“I don’t know, TJ, something just feels off, you know? Like, I should like her, she’s my girlfriend, but I don’t know,” Cyrus ranted.

TJ internally huffed. For some reason, he always hated it when Cyrus talked about his girlfriend, Iris. He didn’t exactly know why. “Maybe you just don’t like her, Cy.”

“But she’s exactly like me! She’s like the perfect girl! And yet, nothing,” Cyrus rambled, exasperated.

“Maybe that’s why. I mean, they do say opposites attract, right?” TJ shrugged.

Cyrus squinted at him in thought. “Maybe.”

TJ couldn’t help but notice that the two of them were almost complete opposites and yet they were the best of friends.

•••

To say that TJ was jealous was an understatement.

That day was the third day in a row that Cyrus blew him off to hang out with Andi and Buffy. It was obvious he had a crush on one of them, and that’s why they had so many closed meetings. It had to be. He had just broken up with Iris, maybe he realized he actually had a crush on one of the two girls he’d grown close with over the course of middle school. TJ just wanted his best friend back.

TJ slammed his locker door shut with a huff, turning to nearly run into a confused Cyrus. “Hey, what’s wrong, Teej?”

TJ closed his eyes for a moment. “It’s nothing.”

Cyrus only grew more concerned. “It’s obviously something if it’s bothering you this much.”

TJ sighed. “Do you like Andi or Buffy?”

Cyrus’ eyes widened. “No, of course not! What in the world could possibly make you think that?!”

“You keep blowing me off for them,” TJ replied in a small voice.

“Ohhh,” Cyrus’ doe eyes widened more in realization. “Believe me, TJ, there is no way that I like either of them. I just really needed to talk something through with them.”

“What could you talk about with them and not me?” TJ asked.

“School project, that’s all. I’m really sorry for blowing you off, TJ,” Cyrus replied, patting TJ’s shoulder, then making his way to class.

———

College was underway, and with more and more work piling up and super conflicting schedules, TJ and Cyrus drifted apart again. It wasn’t intentional this time, at least, they just didn’t have enough time to see each other.

Despite not being around each other anymore, TJ still watched Cyrus thrive. He watched Cyrus join the college’s GSA and soon become president of it, he watched Cyrus put out his first short film as it quickly became a big hit, he watched as Cyrus’ film became a stand out piece in a local film festival— the first one to feature a gay main couple, and he watched as Cyrus headlined his own float for LGBT+ members of the film industry at their local pride parade. He watched Cyrus come into his own.

And yet, TJ was still trapped himself.

He studied education with a minor in history, he was a star player on the school’s basketball team, and he had a few friends. A couple friends. A friend. A roommate. Who was gone half the time with his girlfriend.

He wanted to be out, god knows he wanted to be out so badly. He wanted to confront and yell at himself, asking, why the hell aren’t you being who you are?! What’s your excuse?! Why’re you such a coward?!

Because if he truly lived as he was, maybe he would be that much happier. Have some actual friends. Do something other than work.

But god knows he couldn’t do that.

So he watched Cyrus do it instead.

———

They graduated.

TJ had a job now, he’d become a guidance counselor at a middle school maybe ten minutes away from Shadyside. Not exactly his intention going into education, but it worked well enough.

He couldn’t help but think that a certain brunette would be much better at breaking down young minds than he would be, but that certain brunette was debuting his first major film in a local theater that weekend. It was a memoir type story, about his life. TJ was too busy to see it.

It was mid afternoon in late October when it happened. TJ had been walking to his apartment, headphones in, when he ran into a stranger walking the opposite direction. He turned to apologize, “Oh, sorry— Cyrus Goodman?”

The man turned to look at him. “TJ Kippen?”

TJ smiled. “Hey, long time, no collision.”

Cyrus gave him an easygoing smile. “Yeah, I guess so.”

TJ shrugged his jacket on more, the cold biting at his spine, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “I heard you’ve got a movie coming out this weekend?” At Cyrus’ proud nod, he continued, “I know how much you’ve loved doing that stuff. I’m really proud of you.” You have no idea how proud I am.

“Thanks, TJ,” Cyrus replied, his countenance only growing softer. Then, suddenly, he grimaced. “I guess we lost contact again, huh?”

It’s not like I wanted to. “Yeah.”

“How about I get your number and socials so that doesn’t happen again?” Cyrus said, an apparent teasing lilt to his voice.

TJ smiled softly. “Of course.”

———

Within weeks, the two became inseparable again. Yeah, they had busy schedules, but they were adults now. Priorities.

And apparently, these priorities included binging Netflix on a Friday night and ordering pizza at Cyrus’ house.

Everything that had happened between the two of them over the course of the time they had reconnected reminded TJ so vividly of the last two years of high school, it was like his giddy schoolboy crush had come back tenfold, like he had his favorite elementary school buddy back. They had both matured, sure, but they were still the same. They were still TJ and Cyrus. Attached by the hip.

“Everything on here is shitty, let’s just talk,” Cyrus suggested, turning to face TJ while they both sat on the couch.

“Okay,” TJ shrugged. “Talk about what?”

“Don’t know, didn’t think I’d get that far,” Cyrus joked, the two of them sharing a small laugh.

“Any boys?” TJ asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

Cyrus shoved him with his elbow, laughing, “What is this, a middle school sleepover?”

“You didn’t say no,” TJ teased.

“No, there are no boys,” Cyrus replied, rolling his eyes. “What about you, any girls catching your eye lately?”

TJ laughed, mildly nervous now, the same as he always was whenever the topic of girls came up. “N-no, no girls.”

Cyrus scoffed, mouth full of pizza. “Please, a guy like you’s gotta have tons of ladies falling all over you.”

TJ shrugged again, more falling in on himself now, “I guess, I just don’t like any of them, though.”

Cyrus raised an eyebrow. “Did you have a girlfriend in college or anything either?”

TJ shook his head, crossing his arms to hide his now fidgety hands.

“TJ, have you ever even liked—“

“Cyrus, just... drop it.”

Cyrus just furrowed his eyebrows and grabbed the remote. “Ohhh...kay.” He switched it over to Hulu and picked a random show for them to watch, the comfortable silence from before having shifted into one of tension.

———

To say TJ was nervous was an understatement.

Why was he so nervous? He had no reason to be this nervous. He had 23 years to prepare for this moment, and yet he was still fucking nervous. His hands shook as he slowly took a seat on a park bench, the one nearly twenty feet away from the swing set. Their old swing set.

TJ had arrived 20 minutes earlier than he asked Cyrus to meet him, as an attempt to try and calm himself down. So far, it wasn’t working, all he could think about was how horrible this could end; how once he said it, he could never go back. It would be real.

Cyrus, being Cyrus, got there ten minutes after TJ did, slowing his pace of approaching when taking in TJ’s nervous state. “Hey, Teej, you alright?” he asked, taking his seat next to TJ.

“No,” TJ mumbled.

“I know you wanted to tell me something, but if it stresses you out this much, you don’t have to,” Cyrus said, placing his arm on his friend’s shoulder. He removed it quickly, however, when TJ flinched away. “D-did I do something?”

“No,” TJ jumped to respond. “I just, I don’t know why I’m so nervous about this, I have no reason to be, I—“

“But you are, and those feelings are valid, alright?” Cyrus said softly, as if approaching a small animal. TJ hated it. He wasn’t some fucking bunny, why couldn’t he just say it?

“Cyrus,” TJ started almost breathlessly, then took a deep sigh, looking at the ground. “I’m gay.”

“Teej.” Cyrus took TJ’s hands in his, forcing him to look back up at him. “I am so proud of you, you know that, right? I know how hard it is to come out and say it— no pun intended. Thank you for trusting me with this,” he continued, a soft smile ever present on his face.

“Of course I trust you,” TJ replied in almost a rasp. “I just feel bad that I never told you earlier.”

“You know when it’s the right time, TJ.” Cyrus let go of his hands then, and TJ did his best to mask his disappointment as he leaned back in his seat. “If you don’t mind me asking, how long have you known?”

•••

“Don’t listen to them, they don’t know what they’re saying. They’re just a bunch of butts.”

•••

“I mean, they do say opposites attract, right?”

•••

“I know how much you’ve loved doing that stuff. I’m really proud of you.”

•••

TJ closed his eyes. As long as I’ve known you. “I don’t know. Maybe I always have. Just didn’t wanna face it, I guess.”

Cyrus looked down at the ground, at his feet, nodding. “I can understand that.”

TJ looked over at Cyrus, not moving his head, and seconds later Cyrus did the same, causing them both to break out in small laughter. “Hey, now we can watch gay movies together and I can tease you about boys!” Cyrus quipped.

TJ laughed along, the two boys leaning into each other with their shoulders, and TJ tried his best to hide the small blush appearing on his cheeks.

Maybe coming out wouldn’t be that bad.

———

So maybe coming out was that bad.

It wasn’t him, necessarily, instead it was his sister, Amber. She’d brought her girlfriend home to introduce to their parents the past weekend, and apparently it hadn’t ended well, considering TJ heard nothing about it until he visited home the following weekend.

“What do you mean I shouldn’t talk to my sister anymore? Did Amber end up in jail or something?” TJ asked, sitting by the kitchen island while his mother made herself a salad.

The woman set the small knife in her hand down on the counter and turned around to face TJ, a horrifyingly icy look etched into her eyes. “Did you know that she was a homo?”

And that’s when his heart dropped into his feet.

He swallowed the lump in his throat and hoped to god that his mother didn’t notice how his face paled at her statement, saying, “No, I had no idea.”

He stared back down at the marble on the kitchen island, memorizing every crack and crevice held inside while his mother talked about who knows what— it all sounded muddled as if he was underwater to him, and he quickly escaped the confinements of the house that no longer felt like home after dinner, pulling the excuse of having lots of extra work to do out of thin air.

That’s what it felt like he was breathing. Thin air, less and less and less of it. He was suffocating.

———

Cyrus and TJ grown a lot closer since TJ came out, their glances just a little longer and their smiles just a little softer, and their Friday movie nights almost became a unspoken mandatory thing. But Cyrus noticed that TJ had been more closed off that past week, and it especially showed when he came over to watch some movie that Friday. They settled down to the couch, but significantly further away than usual.

“What, are you not going to let me use the blanket tonight or something?” Cyrus teased with a small laugh.

TJ almost snapped out of whatever dazed state he was in and tossed Cyrus the other end of the blanket with a “Yeah, sorry.”

Cyrus looked him up and down, then put the TV remote back on the table. “You know what? No movie tonight. We’re talking about whatever the hell is throwing you off.”

“Cyrus, I don’t wanna talk about it,” TJ sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Okay, fine,” Cyrus replied, turning his body to face TJ completely. “Then we can talk about something else.”

TJ knew what he was doing, they would talk about something else and then he would pull his psychoanalyzing shit and maneuver the conversation to what was bothering him because it’s not good to bottle things up. He knew that. Maybe TJ did wanna talk about it, but he couldn’t.

“Fine, whatever.”

Cyrus fiddled with a tassel on the blanket. “Any boys?” he asked, causing TJ’s breath to hitch.

Yeah, you, but it’s not like you or anyone else can ever know that.

“TJ,” Cyrus whispered, putting his hand on TJ’s, “talk to me.”

Goddamnit.

TJ looked up into Cyrus’ eyes, trying to say something, anything, but he was frozen still. At least, he was until he noticed Cyrus looking at him with the same intensity he had. He found himself leaning in and Cyrus doing the same, the closeness almost becoming overwhelming.

“Cyrus, I—“

And then they were kissing.

It was perfect, really, the feeling was amazing and the massive choir of anxiety that seemed to hover over TJ all the time lately faded in the background for a minute. He let himself enjoy it, because the second it was over, he would have to deal with it all, with all the consequences that come with it.

After Cyrus pulled away, TJ’s eyes remained closed before slowly fluttering open. Trying to form a coherent sentence at Cyrus’ expectant gaze, the best thing he could come up with was, “Are you pitying me?”

Cyrus grew an incredulous face. “What? No, TJ, I like you.”

I like you.

Oh my god, he likes me.

“I like you, too, Cy.”

The two boys shared a soft and private smile, before Cyrus mumbled, “So, what does this mean, then?”

TJ shrugged, “I don’t know, what do you want it to mean?”

Cyrus looked at him with an incredibly adorable hopeful smile that was hard to look away from. “Boyfriends?”

Ah, shit.

Cyrus obviously could see his face drop at the word, notes by his “What?”

TJ sighed. “Cyrus, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted you to ask me that, for any of what’s happened today to happen. But...”

“But what? What’s the problem?” Cyrus scoffed.

“I’m still not ready for any of this. I thought I would be, I mean, I should be by now, but I’m not. I can still barely say the fucking word out loud, let alone have a public relationship and ask someone else to deal with my bullshit fear. I really, really like you, Cyrus, but there is no fucking way that I can be any form of out right now. So unless you’re cool with, like, a secret relationship, then I can’t let anything happen right now, no matter how much it devastates me.”

Cyrus just sat in silence in front of him, eyebrows furrowed in thought. TJ watched him as the warmth slowly drained out of his eyes and was replaced with ice, the one face he never thought he would see from the brunette. Cyrus started speaking, a steady yet terrifying tone to his voice, “You think I haven’t been waiting for this, TJ? Are you kidding? I’ve liked you since, like, middle school. But I can’t do that for you, I can’t have a secret relationship. I’m not going to shove myself back in the closet just because you’re scared. I did that for way too long for too many people, and there’s no way I’m doing it again. I’m too proud of who I am now to do that.” Cyrus scooted away from him on the couch, biting his nail, before adding, “I hope that one day you are too.”

“Me too,” TJ whispered, before quickly gathering his things. “I’m gonna head out.”

“I think that would be best,” Cyrus replied quietly, tone filled with disappointment.

Shutting Cyrus’ front door felt like severing a limb.

———

Two days later, TJ got an email.

It was an automated email, from Cyrus to a bunch of his closest friends, inviting them all to watch a filming of a scene for a movie he was directing. Cyrus probably forgot to remove him from the list after what happened. He wouldn’t still want him to come, would he?

He decided to go.

He showed up the next day to the set mid-scene, probably ten minutes late, and immediately took note of Cyrus sitting in his chair. He looked drained, paler than usual, irritated. TJ hates that it was probably his fault.

He stood a distance away from the rest of the standing audience, spotting Andi and Buffy across the room, older than he had last seen them but still just as lively. Andi had grown out her hair to her shoulders with a few blonde streaks in it, and Buffy donned business attire, a large briefcase next to her suggesting to him that she’d arrived there from her job. He wondered what they’d ended up doing with their lives, but he was snapped out of his reverie by Cyrus’ exclamation.

“Oh my god, are you kidding? Can’t you see the level of emotion this monologue is supposed to have? Do you need me to act this out for you?” Cyrus shouted, getting up. “Here, give me the script,” he continued angrily as he marched toward the actor, who handed him the script fearfully.

Cyrus began reading, fully in character, not taking his eyes off the paper at first. “I know it’s gotta be hard for you, right? I mean, you have all these expectations to live up to, most of which come from your own head. I know you’re scared, Tyler. But don’t you think that I am, too? I’ve got expectations, too. I have so many people that hate me for who I am without even knowing who I am. I used to be so fucking terrified of it all, for god’s sake, my parents hated it too. But I’m proud of myself now. I don’t hate it anymore, I can’t hate something I can’t control. You can’t either.”

Cyrus looked up from the paper, locking eyes with TJ. TJ didn’t think those eyes could possibly get any deeper.

“You could be up here with me, above all of those shitty high school bullies and annoying parents and idiot strangers. I know that you have it in you, Tyler. You should give yourself the ability to be whoever the hell you want to be. You deserve to be yourself, don’t you understand that?”

Cyrus took a step forward. He was speaking to TJ now, it was obvious to anyone watching. But for some reason, it felt like no one was.

“You don’t have to be afraid anymore.”

And damnit, TJ broke.

He stormed out quickly, not angrily, but instead trying to hide the free flowing tears dripping off his face.

Inside, Cyrus dropped the script, saying quietly while moving to follow TJ out, “Uh, just excuse me for a minute.”

TJ had made his way well down the sidewalk, but Cyrus caught up to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. TJ whipped around, wiping his face, to which Cyrus responded softly, “You came.”

TJ closed eyes for a moment before mumbling, “Of course I came.”

Cyrus launched into a ramble, “TJ, I didn’t mean to make that about you, I just’ve been so hung up over this, the movie isn’t even related to what’s going on and, god, I’m sorry I didn’t remove you from the goddamn email list, I—“

“You were right, though,” TJ interrupted.

“What?” Cyrus froze.

“You were right.” TJ took a step closer to him. “I shouldn’t be afraid anymore.”

“But what about what you said? About not being ready?” Cyrus whispered, also inching closer to him.

“I’m still not, Cy. I’m terrified,” TJ admitted, “because once I face it, it’s real, I can’t hide it away anymore.”

“Oh.”

“But,” TJ continued, taking another step forward, “if you’re willing to wait just a little longer, I will be ready. I just need time.” At Cyrus’ speechless gaze, he added, “I promise it won’t be another ten years, though.”

“TJ, I’m not hiding again,” Cyrus stated, the most sure he’d been this entire conversation.

“You won’t be.” TJ took a hold of one of Cyrus’ hands. “Just be there for me like you always have been, and I promise you, it’ll happen. I like you too much for it not to.”

“You promise?” Cyrus asked in a whisper.

“That’s what I said, isn’t it?” TJ replied, his voice raspy and smile soft and small.

Cyrus closed his eyes, sighing. “Alright.”

“Good.”

———

“How about we do something different tonight?” TJ suggested, only two weeks after he made his promise. He had a plan to fulfill it that night.

“What, do you want to watch Hulu instead of Netflix or something?” Cyrus asked, confused.

“No, I mean, let’s go to the movies,” TJ suggested, a wide grin on his face.

A hesitant smile slid its way onto Cyrus’ expression. “You never want to go out, why?”

TJ shrugged, the grin not leaving his face. “Thought it could be fun.”

Cyrus squinted, then smirked. “Drive-in?”

“Like you even need to ask,” TJ scoffed. “Let’s go.”

•••

They had pulled into the lot playing Love, Simon and Booksmart, a hazy glow setting the mood as dusk settles over the crowd. Small fireflies dot the sky, and Cyrus watched them with amazement. TJ looked with amazement too, but not at the fireflies, instead at the brunette boy next to him, wrapped under their shared blanket in the trunk of TJ’s car.

It was in that moment that TJ really got a good look at him; maybe it was the streetlight making his hair glow with a golden tint, or the way the moon reflected in his eyes, but he noticed something here never really had before. There was still his classic smile and the same cheerful brown eyes, but he was no longer the person that TJ had met long ago in middle school. He had grown into his figure, no longer lanky like he was in high school and stood only an inch shorter than himself. He wore less button ups than he used to, especially those with patterns, and TJ couldn’t remember the last time he’d worn a cardigan. He held himself differently than he used to, as well; he seemed more confident, less falling into himself and more chin raised up with somewhat of a sense of pride. He wasn’t the person TJ had gotten to know. He had changed, and TJ got to witness it, he got to see him truly come into his own.

He realized then that this was his chance to do the same.

“Cyrus?” TJ whispered, causing the brunette to tear his eyes away from Simon having a heart to heart with his mother.

“Hm?”

TJ’s voice was caught in his throat, not knowing what to say, where to start, and it was apparently enough for Cyrus to notice, as after a beat, he asked quietly, “Is there something you wanna tell me?”

“Yeah,” he rasped out, inching his hand ever so slightly towards Cyrus’.

Cyrus scooted closer to him, took TJ’s hand in his, and intertwined their fingers. “Then say it.”

TJ’s hand was practically burning, and if he turned his head just a smidge, their faces would be a mere inch apart. It was as if every molecule in his body, every force in the universe was screaming at him to just do it, just say something. “I can’t,” he whispered.

“Why not?” Cyrus asked, matching tone, and this caused TJ to turn his head.

The two boys looked at each other for a moment, as if they were both mapping out every detail of the other’s face, committing every scar and freckle to memory— that is, until TJ shifted his gaze down to Cyrus’ lips, for only a moment, a millisecond.

That must’ve been what did it, what made him snap, because then they were kissing.

It was nothing like the first one, really. The first one was questioning, a puzzle piece sliding into place, figuring out that yes, this is what I want. But this one, this one was passionate, it was I never want to lose you again, it was you’re what was meant for me this entire time, I need you, I love you...

Okay, maybe a little early for that one.

Regardless, it was perfect, and he could see the slight fear in Cyrus’ eyes when they pulled away.

“I have never wanted anything more than to be with you, Cyrus. You know that, right?” TJ mumbled, slightly out of breath.

Cyrus nodded, taking a long blink.

“And, I...” TJ looked down, fiddling with his fingers. He continued, “I’d love to be your boyfriend, if you’ll take me.”

Cyrus smiled at him, almost blinding, filled with affection and pride. He nodded, throwing his arms around TJ’s neck in a tight hug, and TJ held him back just as tight.

———

TJ never told his parents, he never felt like he needed to. He never told his parents when him and Cyrus had started dating, and he never told them three years later that the two of them had gotten engaged. Which is why some may have found it odd that he sent a wedding invitation to them with no warning. Needless to say, they never RSVP’d.

It might’ve been weird to that same some that neither of the two men’s families were at the wedding, no parents of either groom present for slow dances, only many, many friends that they had made throughout the years, old and new. But it was perfect to them. It was theirs.

#andi mack #tyrus #tj kippen #cyrus goodman #my fic #my writing #fic #jtky universe

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seraph-novak · 5 years ago

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Take A Breath (Post-Finale)

Summary ~ After the life-changing events of Andi’s party, Cyrus is worried that what happened between him and TJ was nothing more than a friendly gesture.

~~~~~

Less than twelve hours after the life-changing events of Andi’s party, Cyrus was standing outside TJ’s house, debating whether to knock on the door or not. On his way there, he’d distracted himself by scrolling through his latest texts from the other boy, privately blushing at the single heart emoji TJ had sent him after saying goodnight. But now that he was actually here, his fist frozen in the air mid-knock, there was nothing to keep his nerves at bay. What if TJ thought he was being too clingy by showing up at his house the next morning? What if everything that had happened between them last night had simply been a one-off, a friendly gesture of solidarity and nothing more? What if he was still deluding himself by thinking he ever stood a chance with someone as wonderful as TJ Kippen? Just the mere possibility of rejection made him wince, his stomach stirring unpleasantly as the sweat began beading on his forehead. He felt like he was on the verge of passing out.

Stumbling a few steps backwards, he reached blindly for his phone in his back pocket, desperately wanting to seek some well-needed advice from Buffy and Andi before venturing forward. He was blinking the sweat out of his eyes when the door suddenly opened, releasing a musical breeze from inside the house, and TJ’s mom greeted him with a bemused smile. She was wearing a fluffy robe and hugging a mug of steaming coffee in her hands, and it dawned on Cyrus just how early it really was. He felt like a complete idiot for disrupting their morning routine like this. But, before he could apologise, or even try to explain himself, TJ’s mom leaned her hip against the doorway and quirked an eyebrow.

“Cyrus Goodman,” she said with a knowing smile, as if she’d been expecting him. “Do you plan on creeping about on my porch all day, or do you wanna come inside?”

Cyrus spluttered, his cheeks flooding with heat. “Oh! Sorry, Mrs. Kippen, I didn’t mean to –”

“I’m only messing with you, hon. Get yourself in here and shut the door.”

He couldn’t argue, even if he wanted to. The words had completely vacated his mind. It was like a repeat of his embarrassing first encounter with TJ’s mom a few weeks ago, when he’d told her to get home safe while she’d been standing in her own doorway. He could barely think about that day without mentally kicking himself for being so ridiculous. And now, here he was again, a blushing, tongue-tied disaster as TJ’s mom led him down the hallway, clearly attempting to make small talk with him while they walked.

“TJ’s just practicing in the living room,” she told him, nodding in the direction of the beautiful music. “He should be finished in a few minutes, if you wanna see him.”

Cyrus forced a smile. “Thank you, Mrs. Kippen. I’m sorry for being here so early.”

TJ’s mom glanced down at her pyjamas, then huffed a laugh. “Oh, don’t mind me. I’ve been up for hours. I just don’t see the point in getting dressed unless I’m leaving the house.”

At that, Cyrus chuckled. TJ’s mom reminded him of Bex in many ways, and that helped him relax somewhat. But as soon he caught a glimpse of TJ in the living room a few moments later, his head bent over a black piano, he was reduced to a trembling, awestruck mess within seconds. Not that anyone could blame him. The other boy was playing the piano with his eyes closed, a lock of dirty-blond hair falling across his forehead, and his hands were dancing across the keys with an elegance that Cyrus had never seen before in his life. There was a cute little furrow between his brows, and Cyrus was itching to reach out and smooth it with the pad of his thumb. But at the same time, he didn’t want to shatter the spell by interrupting him. He was more than happy to stand here and watch him, anyway. He’d stand here for hours, if he could.

“Impressive, huh?” TJ’s mom whispered, lightly poking him in the shoulder. “I taught him the basics, but there’s no teaching that… He’s a natural talent, that’s for sure.”

Cyrus swallowed thickly, his eyes still glued on TJ. “Yeah, he… He’s amazing, alright.”

“He says the same thing about you, you know?”

“What?”

“I heard the party was pretty eventful,” she continued coyly, somehow changing the subject without changing it at all. “TJ seemed to have a lot of fun.”

The implication was too strong to be anything but an outright question, and Cyrus had no idea what answer he was supposed to give. For one thing, he didn’t know how much TJ had told his mom, and how much he wanted to remain unsaid. But most importantly… he wasn’t quite sure what had happened between him and TJ on the bench last night. That was partly why he was here in the first place: to figure out where they stood, once and for all. He only hoped they were on the same page.

“Mrs. Kippen, I –”

“Please,” she said, raising a hand to pause him, “call me Riley. And TJ’s dad hasn’t been in the picture for a long time, so… It’s just plain old ‘miss’ now.”

Cyrus bit his lip, internally berating himself for being so obtuse. TJ had told him how his father had left when he was younger, of course – only sending the occasional text to let them know he wasn’t dead in a ditch somewhere – but apparently his brain turned to mush when he was nervous.

“I’m so sorry, Miss – I mean, um… Riley.”

“There’s no need to apologise,” Riley said with a shrug. She glanced over at TJ and smiled, her eyes turning soft with a mixture of pride and fondness. “I got a wonderful son out of the deal, so… I’m more than okay with how things turned out.”

Cyrus followed her eyes across the room, his heart rate slowing to a calm, melodic pace as he watched TJ’s hands glide across the piano, a private smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. When he’d been crushing on Jonah, his heart had leapt and fluttered like an injured bird reaching for the sky. But with TJ, it was the opposite. Unlike Jonah, who’d made him feel giddy and nauseous with nervous excitement, TJ had a steadying effect on him, his very presence being enough to put him at ease. He wondered if that was the difference between like, and… Well, whatever it was he felt for TJ. He didn’t have a name for it yet, but whatever it was, it made him feel safe and happy and full of hope. And even if TJ didn’t feel the same way, he was grateful for everything he’d done for him. He was grateful for this, right here. This feeling of complete and utter contentment.

“You’re right,” he whispered, more to himself than anyone else. “He really is wonderful.”

Riley hummed. She wasn’t watching her son anymore; Cyrus could feel her eyes on the side of his face, but he couldn’t seem to meet her gaze. Maybe he was too entranced by TJ’s beauty, or… Maybe he was afraid of what he’d find in her expression. Either way, he kept facing forward, allowing the music thrumming beneath TJ’s fingertips to distract him from his anxiety-riddled thoughts. He wasn’t ready to acknowledge how transparent his feelings for TJ were to the rest of the world just yet.

“I’ll go fetch you boys something to drink,” Riley said.

That was enough to turn his head.

“You don’t have to do that –”

“Oh, nonsense. I may as well make myself useful.” She flicked a parting glance at TJ, then gave Cyrus a sympathetic pat on the shoulder, her eyes brimming with understanding. “Don’t overthink it, hon. Just talk to him.”

Before he could respond, Riley gave his shoulder a final squeeze, then walked away, leaving him standing alone in the hallway. If he really wanted to make a run for it, now was his chance. But, as he looked over at TJ, his heart swelling with pride as the other boy reached the crescendo of the song with flawless determination, he knew he couldn’t leave. Not until he’d spoken to TJ. He needed to know if what had happened between them at Andi’s party was more than just a fluke. He needed to know if TJ felt the same way. And if he didn’t find out soon, he was pretty sure he was going to explode. So, with a deep, trembling breath, he waited for TJ to reach the end of the song, then walked up to him.

“That was beautiful,” he said, his voice shaking.

TJ jumped. “Woah! Where did you come from?”

“Your mom let me in… Can I sit?”

“Sure,” TJ said, his lips twitching with a smile as he moved further up the bench seat, making room for Cyrus to sit down.

For an agonising moment, neither of them said a word. They both sat there, stiff and awkward as the silence stretched on, the air between them heavy with uncertainty. A full minute passed, and Cyrus was seconds away from bolting through the door. But then TJ turned to face him, their knees bumping together, and reached for his hand. Just like last night, their fingers threaded together with an overwhelming sense of familiarity, and Cyrus felt himself sagging with relief. A tear rolled down his cheek as he stared down at their joined hands, a breathless laugh escaping his lips. He hadn’t been deluding himself, after all.

“Hey,” TJ said gently, using his free hand to cup Cyrus’ face. “You’re crying.”

Cyrus shook his head. “I’m just… I’m so happy this is real.”

“What d’you mean?”

“I dunno… I guess I was just scared. I thought maybe last night didn’t mean the same thing for both of us.”

TJ shrugged. “Well, what did it mean for you?”

“Everything,” Cyrus admitted, ducking his head to hide the blush blooming across his cheeks. He hadn’t expected to be this open about his feelings, but apparently he was incapable of hiding from TJ anymore. It was like they’d broken a seal by holding hands, and now there was no going back. Not that he ever wanted to. He was more than happy with this new development in their relationship.

A thumb swept across his cheek, capturing the tear before it reached his chin. TJ was watching him with the same level of fondness Cyrus had possessed as he’d watched him playing piano just moments before.

“I guess it did mean the same thing for us both then,” TJ said, the hint of a smirk playing on his lips.

Cyrus glanced up at him, then laughed, the rest of his anxieties melting away as they moved closer together. Down the hallway, Cyrus could hear Riley brewing them some coffee, an old jazz song playing on the radio as she worked. If they didn’t move apart soon, she’d catch them in the act. The risk was thrilling, in a way, but Cyrus didn’t want to force TJ into coming out too soon. Not to the person he cared about most in the world. Which is why he forced himself to let go of the other boy’s hand and turn towards the piano, wiggling his fingers above the keys with a boisterous smile.

“Come on then,” he said, purposely brushing his shoulder against TJ’s. “Teach me how to play.”

TJ huffed a laugh. “If you insist.”

A shiver ran up his arm as TJ touched the backs of his hands, gently guiding them across the piano as he murmured the names of the chords against the shell of his ear. It was much slower, and not perfectly in time, but Cyrus could hear the same song TJ had been playing earlier taking life beneath his hands.

“There you go,” TJ whispered. “You’re a natural.”

Cyrus shot him a dubious look, but it soon faded away as he saw the genuine pride in TJ’s eyes, nestled amongst a forest of warmth and encouragement. It was an expression he knew all too well, and one that never failed to make him smile. Of all the wonderful, accepting people he had in his life, TJ was probably the one that believed in him the most, and Cyrus loved him for it. For such a long time, he’d seen himself as useless; nothing but an expendable sidekick who people kept around to laugh at. But with TJ, he felt invincible, as if he could do anything he wanted to. It still baffled him how much faith TJ had in him, but he was slowly getting used to it. Maybe one day, he wouldn’t be surprised by his own capabilities. He was sure TJ would do everything he could to get him to that place.

“This is amazing,” he said, grinning down at the piano in awe. After a few more chords, he turned to TJ with a teasing smile, his mind still cloudy from their close proximity. “But here’s my question: how the heck do you know how to play ‘Born This Way’ by heart?”

TJ blushed. “Oh. Um… It’s a long story.”

“It can’t be that long!”

“It’s not,” he admitted. “But it’s embarrassing, you know?”

“Nothing you tell me could make me like you less,” Cyrus said, completely missing the fact that he’d just used the ‘L-word’ for the very first time in reference to TJ. It’s not as if they were hiding it from each other, after all. “C’mon, Teej… Please tell me.”

That’s all it took to break him.

“Fine,” TJ said, rolling his eyes with feigned annoyance. “I heard it on the radio when I was like, seven, and it always kinda stuck with me, you know? I used to listen to it all the time. It was one of the first songs I learnt how to play.” He glanced at Cyrus, his bottom lip caught between his teeth. “I guess I know why it meant so much to me now.”

Cyrus smiled. “What did your mom think about your Lady Gaga obsession?”

“She was cool with it,” TJ said. “I mean, my Gaga phase, not the other thing…” He was wringing his hands together, and Cyrus could tell they were standing on the edge of a very important conversation. “I haven’t told her yet. I mean, not outright… We kinda talked about it a few weeks ago. About you, actually. But I never said the words. Is that bad?”

“Of course not,” Cyrus told him, grabbing his hands and holding them against his chest. “It’s completely up to you when you tell her. If you tell her, I mean. Not everyone needs to come out.”

TJ licked his lips. “I think I want to.”

“Okay.”

“Do you think I should?”

“It’s your choice,” he said, carefully slotting their palms together. “I can’t help you make it, Teej. But I promise you, whatever you decide, I’ll be there for you. No matter what.”

At that, TJ released a long, tremulous breath. Cyrus could feel his muscles relaxing beneath his touch, his fingers melting between his own. He thought back to that perfect moment on the bench last night, and how they’d sat there for almost an hour, simply enjoying each other’s company until TJ’s mom had called, asking him to come home soon. They hadn’t talked much, but that hadn’t been a problem; their hands had said everything they’d been thinking and feeling, and that was more than enough. Even when Cyrus had walked TJ partly down the road at the end of the night, they hadn’t spoken. TJ had smiled at him beneath a streetlamp, his face basked in a yellow glow, and Cyrus had reached up on his tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek before fleeing back to Andi’s house, his face the same colour as his red plaid shirt. Before he’d even reached the end of the street, his phone had buzzed in his pocket, and Cyrus had opened it to find a new text from TJ, promising to text him before going to bed. He hadn’t stopped grinning all the way back to Andi’s house.

“So,” he said, aiming for a flirtatious smile as he sidled up to TJ. “What other songs can you play?”

TJ shrugged. “If you stay for lunch, I can teach you some.”

“Would your mom be okay with that?”

“My mom loves you, Cy.”

“We’ve only spoken twice…”

“She’s good at reading people,” TJ told him, his smile turning soft as his eyes flitted over Cyrus’ face, silently taking him in. “I guess you passed the test.”

Cyrus chuckled. “That’s a relief.”

“So, you’ll stay?”

“Yeah,” he said, dropping his voice to a whisper as he rested his head against TJ’s shoulder, his eyes slipping closed with a blissful sigh. “I’d like that.”

After a beat of startled silence, TJ pressed a hesitant kiss to his forehead, then cleared his throat. His hands were trembling as he slowly unravelled them from Cyrus’ grip, resting one against his hip to hold him close, and using the other to play a new song on the piano. Even with one hand, he was incredible, and Cyrus could feel himself slowly drifting off as TJ continued to play, quietly singing the words against Cyrus’ cheek. It was a perfect moment, just like their time on the bench together, and every other moment they’d shared before then.

There were so many future memories to be made, and there was no one else he would rather spend them with than Thelonious Jagger Kippen. His best friend. His biggest supporter. His boyfriend.

The End.

~~~~~

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, please like/comment/reblog. Any kind of feedback means the world to me! ♥

#tyrus #andi mack #tj kippen #cyrus goodman #tyrus fics #thelonious jagger kippen #renew andi mack #save andi mack

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captainkippen · 5 years ago

Note

fic where cyrus is a french foreign exchange student and tj is blown away

Okay, I put a lil spin on this I hope you don't mind. Here you go!

He hadn't meant for it to happen, but like most things that went wrong in his life the whole ordeal arose as a result of his own inability to deal with getting flustered. Trust Cyrus to get himself into a situation like this.

It started off like this:

It was the first day of his junior year and for the first time, Cyrus had classes on the East Side of campus. He had never had classes there before, who could even tell why, but up until the moment he went in search of room 203 it hadn't occurred to him that this fact might become a problem. Why would it be a problem? Well, because Cyrus had no sense of direction. Especially in new places.

The room he wandered into was decidedly Not room 203, Miss Ruiz's AP History class, hence the mixture of confusion and surprise he felt when an excited bundle of jock came bounding towards him and grabbed his hand to shake it.

"Hey! You made it, awesome! I'm T.J. I'm you're buddy while you're here."

Cyrus knew who T.J. Kippen was. Everybody did. Captain of the basketball team, tall, scary and generally all around mean. He had only ever seen him frown before, so he was even more thrown off by the way T.J. was beaming at him. It was kind of cute.

"I- what?"

"Oh, sorry, did you not get that? My bad, talking too fast. And in English. Je m'appelle T.J."

Cyrus officially had no idea what was going on.

"Uh... guide touristique? Sorry, my French isn't the best... Natalie was meant to be helping you, but she's off sick... you are the new french exchange kid, right?"

There was a moment of silence, and before he could stop himself Cyrus was feigning sudden understanding and nodding. "Oh! Yes... uh, I mean... oui?"

"Great!" TJ grabbed his hand and Cyrus felt his face go red. "I'm meant to be showing you around and stuff. Let's go."

The next few hours were torture, but not for the reasons Cyrus would've expected. TJ took it upon himself to show him around all the sports department, explaining baseball in terrible fractured French, while Cyrus nodded and tried to look as European as possible. It was harder than he expected. By lunchtime they had both taken to gesticulating at one another like lunatics. Cyrus knew he should tell him the truth, there was probably a real French exchange student wandering around lost right as they talked, but he couldn't bring himself to.

T.J's smile every time Cyrus made an attempt at French was breathtaking. Cyrus was considering buying a beret.

Before his plans to learn an entire new language and forge a new identity could come into fruition, however, the whole jig was dashed when Cyrus' friends appeared.

"Cyrus?" Cyrus turned slowly, dread filling his stomach. Oh no.

Andi Mack and Jonah Beck, two of his best friends, stood by the bleachers wearing matchinf baffled expressions. "Aren't you meant to be in class right now? And why are you speaking in French? You don't even take French."

Silence. It felt like it went on forever before Cyrus could finally bring himself to look at T.J. He had a surprisingly calm expression on his face.

"You're not a foreign exchange student, are you?"

"I, uh-" How do you explain to somebody that you were so caught off guard by how cute they were that you pretended to be from a different continent altogether?

"No. I'm not," he admitted with a defeated sigh. "I just... I was looking for my history class this morning, but I found you instead, and when you started talking I didn't know how to tell you that you'd made a mistake and then you smiled at me and everything got out of hand."

He snapped his mouth shut fast. He hated his own tendency to ramble when panicked.

"Well, jeez Goodman, you didn't have to pretend for my sake. We could've had a normal conversation in English if you'd just said."

"I know I- wait. I never told you my name," Cyrus frowned at T.J. "Wait... you knew who I was this whole time?"

It was T.J's turn to blush. He rubbed at the back of his neck and gave an awkward shrug.

"We'll just leave you two alone..." Andi said, turning slowly with a bemused expression on her face before grabbing Jonah and pulling him away.

"Then why did you let me pretend to be French?!"

"Uh... well," he kicked at the ground, staring down at his feet, then mumbled something utterly unintelligible.

"What?"

T.J. sighed. "I wanted an excuse to talk to you. And, like, when you walked into the classroom earlier I just thought it was the perfect icebreaker, but then you said yes to being the French guy! And I couldn't accuse you of being a liar right after I had just lied, could I?"

Cyrus' heart did a somersault. "You... wanted to talk to me?"

"Yeah... um, I don't know. I've seen you around and stuff, I guess. You seem pretty cool, but you're always with Driscoll and she doesn't like me so..."

"So we're both just total losers, huh?" Cyrus grinned.

T.J. looked up in surprised, then slowly began to smile back. "I guess we are."

"Well... in that case, do you maybe wanna go be losers together at The Spoon after school? Call it a study date. We could both brush up on our French."

"You want to go out with me, after all that? After I lied?"

"Hey, a boy doesn't pretend to be French for just anybody around here now.

The beaming was back.

"It's a date," T.J. said with a laugh, and Cyrus decided the day had not been so awful after all.

#tyrus #andi mack #cyrus goodman #TJ Kippen

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rosedavid · 5 years ago

Text

Post-Finale Tyrus Oneshot

In which TJ and Cyrus tell the group about their relationship.

This is just a really quick, probably not good fic post bench scene! I hope it’s okay :) I plan to write more of these in the future, too, but this was just a traditional post bench scene fic at the spoon like you’ve already seen a bunch.

Requested by @tyrusendgameperiod

“Are you sure they’re okay with me coming?” TJ wonders.

TJ and Cyrus stroll down the sidewalk toward The Spoon. It’s early afternoon on the day after Andi’s party. At a glance, everything seems completely the same. The two of them banter like normal, walking so close that their shoulders bump; that’s no different. The difference is in the purposefulness of their motions, the lingering heart eyes, hands knocking into each other more consistently, and the secret smiles directed at each other.

“Of course,” Cyrus assures him, “I’m sure they’ll be fine with it.”

TJ stops in his tracks. “Wait, you haven’t told them?!”

“Well, not exactly…”

“Underdoggg!”

“Thelonious!” Cyrus mocks, grinning even when TJ swats his arm.

TJ hisses, “I told you not to use my real name!”

Cyrus bumps his shoulder against TJ’s playfully, and TJ knocks back. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry. I wasn’t lying when I said it was a great name, though. Now come on, let’s go! I promise they’ll all be okay with you coming. After all, you’ve become their friend, too.”

TJ smiles, a soft smile reserved for Cyrus that simultaneously causes his heart to pound and mind turn to mush. Nothing will ever top the feeling he gets when TJ is around, and he’ll never be able to get over it.

They continue their short walk to The Spoon, hands brushing. Both just want to reach out and interlace their hands, but they still aren’t sure exactly how they stand, especially when it comes to being out in public. Today, they plan to start small and tell their friends about their new relationship. Since Cyrus is already out to Buffy, Andi, and Jonah, the idea is much less nerve wracking for him. Not to mention, Buffy and Andi have always been very aware of his crush on TJ.

For TJ, on the other hand, coming out is a whole new concept for him. He’s barely admitted to himself and Cyrus, and the idea of telling a group of people terrifies him. Despite Cyrus’s reassurances that they didn’t have to tell anyone yet, TJ wants to come out, at least to a few people. He wants people to know him for his true self, not the persona he made for himself at school. At least now he has Cyrus there with him, with makes him feel exponentially calmer.

They arrive at The Spoon expecting to see the familiar group of three sitting at a booth, but instead they’re met with the addition of Marty as well as Amber giggling along with the group. Cyrus notices TJ visibly tense beside him.

“You okay?” Cyrus whispers, placing a hand on his shoulder.

TJ nods. “Yeah, I just…more people.”

“We don’t have to do this.”

“No, I want to, I really do. I’m just nervous, but I’m ready.”

Cyrus squeezes his shoulder. “I’m really proud of you, Teej.”

They share a final smile before walking over to the booth, where Andi waves them down. TJ and Cyrus sit together, as usual. All of them together barely fit in the largest, round booth. Across from them, Buffy sends Cyrus an inquisitive glance, to which Cyrus rolls his eyes and mouths ‘not yet.’

“Oh, TJ, what a nice surprise,” Andi comments genuinely. “I guess we all invited someone else.”

“Our friend group has certainly grown,” Cyrus agrees. “I never thought I’d be this popular!”

The group chuckles at this.

“Actually, I invited Marty for a reason,” Buffy starts, looking over at him as he wraps an arm around her shoulders.

“I knew it!” Andi and Cyrus call out at the same time.

Buffy shakes her head fondly. The three of them lift their hands into a group high five, grinning over at the couple. Buffy glows, seeming happier than ever. Everyone else congratulates them, as well.

Suddenly, Cyrus feels TJ’s hand slipping into his underneath the table, squeezing tight. Cyrus squeezes back, thumb sweeping over the backside of TJ’s hand. Even though Cyrus has already faced coming out multiple times, this is completely new territory. Not to mention, he knows that at one point Buffy and Andi weren’t TJ’s biggest fans. He knows that they fully support their friendship (and crushes), but it still feels weird. Now, they’re also adding Jonah, Marty, and Amber into the equation, and Cyrus already knows that Marty and TJ haven’t exactly made up for the times TJ completely ignored him.

“Cyrus and I are dating, too,” TJ blurts out suddenly, unable to hold it any longer in fear of exploding from anticipation.

The table goes silent, and for a moment all of TJ’s worst thoughts and fears start up. Beside him, Cyrus looks as surprised as everyone else, as if he didn’t expect the announcement that was coming, either. Just as TJ begins to slip his hand away from Cyrus’s to head out, Buffy and Andi let out an ear screeching squeal.

“Cyrus!” Buffy beams, reaching her hands out from across the table.

Cyrus holds his hands out to her, to which she grabs them and shakes them excitedly. Andi laughs with joy.

“Finally,” Andi sighs in relief, causing Buffy to nod in agreement. TJ and Cyrus blush at the same time.

“Wait, since when do we all like TJ?” Marty asks in confusion, finally figuring out exactly how much he’s missed.

Buff rolls her eyes. “I’ll explain later. Besides, like is a strong word…”

TJ scowls, throwing a napkin at Buffy. “You’ll regret that later, Driscoll.”

“I’m sure I will, Kippen.”

Cyrus is relieved that his friends all get along with his boyfriend. His boyfriend. Cyrus doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of saying that word. And now, all of their friends know, so he can flaunt it all he wants

“That’s awesome you two!” Jonah grins. Sweet, oblivious Jonah. If only he knew how hard Cyrus crushed on him for most of middle school.

TJ’s smile is infectious. Just like Marty did, TJ wraps an arm around Cyrus. In response, Cyrus drops his head in the crevice between TJ’s neck and shoulder.

“How are they already cuter than us?” Buffy groans, “It’s disgusting.”

“I think it’s adorable,” Amber says. “I want someone to look at me like that.”

Andi laughs awkwardly. “Yeah, me too.”

The tension between them is visible to everyone at the table, but Buffy and Cyrus pick up on it the most, sending sneaky looks at each other. She’s next.

They spend the rest of the afternoon at The Spoon having a fantastic time. TJ seems to be fitting in with the group better and better which makes Cyrus’s heart swell with pride. He saw the good inside TJ, but only TJ could be the one to make a change. Now, he’s come so far since ‘scary basketball guy.’

And when Cyrus reenacts his and TJ’s first meeting for the group in Tater Theatre, TJ just watches him with fond eyes, occasionally chiming to add on something. “No, Teej, that’s not how it went!” “Uh, it totally went like that!” “You were not staring at me with ‘heart eyes’! They were more like scary, intimidating eyes.”

Although everything is changing, and change can be scary, everything is slotting into place. It’s new and scary and exciting, and now TJ and Cyrus can face it together.

#tyrus #tyrus fanfic #andi mack #tj kippen #cyrus goodman #fanfiction #answered #prompts

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