#i might do more rants in response to this guy's videos in the future
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otogariado · 2 years ago
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15 questions!
supposed to be 15 mutuals too but i'm still too shy to tag people on this blog BUT if you don't mind getting tagged in posts like this then feel free to like this post & i'll tag you in the future. teehee
i was tagged by @stripesysheaven 💖💖 thank you
1. are you named after anyone?
my deadname is probably inspired by some french royalty. i did nickname myself after a videogame protagonist though, even though i don't use that nickname much any more
wait actually i'm vaguely remembering smth abt my mom supposedly naming myself after a local actress. that works too if that's true
2. when was the last time you cried?
very recently because i was very sad. but also it's easy for me to cry bc of stuff i watch. i teared up during three different moments while watching the new puss in boots movie
3. do you have kids?
no. probably never. it's a very big responsibility
4. do you use sarcasm a lot?
not a lot, just sometimes. usually just to be funny or when i'm ranting to someone abt an anecdote in private. i like making it apparent when i do though. "i DONT use sarcasm at all NOT using it right now. what makes you say that"
5. what sports do you play/have you played?
recently competed in badminton doubles!! with strangers i met like minutes before the matches started haha. we were short on people. i'm not Very Good at any particular sport but i'll play most things for fun. i miss doing frisbee class
6. what's the first thing you notice about other people?
i'm always So Scareds of people so it's hard to answer this question... probably the way they speak? i don't have to be looking at people to notice that
7. what's your eye colour?
almost black, deep brown thangs
8. scary movies or happy endings?
schmaltz forever
9. any special talents?
i can follow sheet music on the spot (just give me the pitch and i'm good) and i'm good at bullshitting melodies i've never sang before
10. where were you born?
born and raised and still here in the philippines
11. what are your hobbies?
watching shows and movies and getting incredibly emotionally attached to fictional characters and thinking about them too hard is my #1 hobby. aside from that i like listening to video essays/podcasts, drawing, writing... i also like walking. once i learn how to ride a bike i'd like to do that regularly too
i need more physical crafty hobbies, i just don't have the space/space management skills to do them rn... i used to do a lot of paper crafting as a kid
12. do you have any pets?
toothless is a... tuxedo cat? he's technically my grandpa's but i consider him my little guy too
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they're my cousins' but i also live with two dogs :) toffee (middle) who is a very bitey puppy. he's aspin but he probably has some fancy breed in his blood or smn bc his fur is very soft. and betsy (right, jailed for crimes. she doesn't mind) is a shih tzu and they've had her for a few years now C:
13. how tall are you?
i hate checking my height cz i might shrink again. probably around 5'6"
14. favorite subject in school?
i loved math and science in grade school. in high school i enjoyed lit a lot more. pending answer for college lol
15. dream job?
my cousin once brought up the idea of us owning a bar/cafe/resto thing together. it would be nice!
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theoceanswaves0 · 7 years ago
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I’m watching this review of Pokemon SuMo episode 32, and I seriously have to wonder if this person doesn’t understand that you can develop more than one character in a spotlight episode??? Like, yes, it’s a Lana episode, Lana is the focus, but that doesn’t mean she has to be the only character that makes any progress?? Episodes generally have B-plots anyway, which is what Lillie’s story is?? I know that Lillie steals the spotlight, game-wise and in the anime, but it’s nowhere near as bad as this reviewer is making it out to be. HE EVEN POINTS THIS OUT HIMSELF saying “Lana got the most screentime and development” so what’s even the point of getting mad???
Not only that but I’m assuming that Lillie is going to continue to make this sort of progress while they’re on Akala. Meanwhile, Lana, Kiawe and Mallow (possibly Sophocles???) will get arcs that last a couple of episodes, with Lillie getting B-plot material and being ready to take on whatever the next major arc has in store for the SuMo squad.
not to mention, i guarantee ppl would complain if Lillie just sat in the background with nothing to do but whatever.
also not to mention that ofc we’re going to want to see her reaction to having to try out a ride pokemon??? just bc she’s bonded w a couple of pokemon doesn’t mean she’s conquered her fear??? sure it can get repetitive but we see that lillie is willing to try and make progress.
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catxsnow · 4 years ago
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LIFE SAVER B.A.
Request: Could I request Bart Allen x reader where she is the blood daughter of Bruce Wayne- maybe make her superhero alias phoenix or something and she falls hard for him. Bruce is a protective father and wants Bart to prove himself of being worthy for her hand. Fluff.
Warning: mentions of blood, violence, Bruce being a bad dad, fluff, angst, swearing
A/N: Y’all had me so distracted playing Among Us I nearly forgot to post 
Anyways, first Bart fic, hope you guys enjoy!! 
Word Count: 3.3k
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"Bruce you're being fucking ridiculous."
Joining the Young Justice Team was your father's idea. Tim was there, Dick was still the leader, and you deserved your spot there as well. You despised the idea at first - it was easier working with Batman than it was a bunch of kids, even if two of your brothers were on the team. It didn't seem fair that he was making you go as well.
You never talked to very many people there - Tim, Dick, sometimes Conner. It was easier just to stick by yourself until the mission came. Maybe that was the Bruce in you - wanting to be alone and independent - maybe that was just you not wanting to make friends. Tim fit in well, Dick founded the team. They were meant for this, you weren't.
Maybe that was the reason you were excited to see a new face when Bart arrived. He was just as annoying and over energetic as everyone else you knew, but there was still something different about him. He wasn't like Wally or Conner or even your brothers. He carried a weight on his shoulders that he desperately tried to hide.
Not to mention that he seemed to know all the right things to make you smile. Bart became close to you, closer than you had been than anyone else. Dick was the first to notice. He watched you sneak into Bart's room at night to hang out and play video games or that the two of you would always make sure you were together on missions.
It was subtle at first, until Beast Boy noticed and started spreading around that you were dating - totally not true. However, in Bart's eyes it seemed to be enough to grow a pair and kiss you. His time was less than fortunate - maybe customs were different in the future but in that day and age you generally wouldn't have asked for your first kiss with him to be in front of your entire team.
Things with him were going great, at least until Tim snitched on the both of you to your father. Bruce was pissed that you were dating Bart. Not only did he not trust the speedster, he didn't want you dating anyone. You last boyfriend hadn't ended well and Bruce still had to be held back from breaking his bones.
"I've made my decision. That's final." Bruce was sitting in front of his computer. His cowl was down, but he refused to meet eyes with you. He could hear you pacing back and forth behind him. Anger rolled off you like waves - there was no way that he could do this to you. Not when he let you have so much responsibility as Batgirl.
"I'm sixteen! You can't just let me fight assholes every night but not let me have a boyfriend!" You yelled at him. It was beyond frustrating that he refused to look at you. It had only been a couple months that you were dating Bart but losing him hurt more than anything else. Bruce couldn't do this to you.
"I told you already. You're not dating that boy. He hasn't proved himself yet."  
"Bart has proved himself over and over again! You just couldn't give him the time of day to notice!" You exclaimed. Bruce couldn't even bother to turn back and look at you as you defended your boyfriend. He didn't care for Bart from the start, and now more than ever he wasn't willing to give him a chance.
"I said no."
"Fuck you, Bruce," You finally snapped. As much as he hated when you swore and yelled at him like this, it happened more often than either of you were willing to admit. It was rare for you to ever see eye to eye with your farther. Dick was the same, Tim was learning. Jason was the only person that you seemed to constantly get along with and now he's gone.
Bruce still didn't turn to you. Without another word, you left the cave and headed straight to the nearest Zeta Tube. He couldn't stop you. Unless he wanted to pull you from that team - which he didn't - you would still see Bart every day. There was no way that he could keep you from seeing him.
It broke you knowing that your father wanted to take away the one thing that made you happy on that team. Did Dick know? Tim? Unlikely. Your chest ached at the betrayal. Fists clenched at your sides as you entered the cave and tears threatening to burn your eyes. Why did he have to be so damn persistent?
Instead of heading to your room like you wanted to, you went directly to the training room. There was no point in sulking over your hurt feelings when you could direct them to training. Bruce instilled that into you too. It seemed that all of your bad traits stemmed from him.
A sword twirled in your hand as the simulation started up. Fake assassins came at you from every angle  but none of them stood a chance against your anger. You moved effortlessly around the room, taking down every faux enemy in your way.
Sweat dripped down your body and you had lost track of how long you had been going at it. The sword began to feel heavy in your hands from swinging it around. Your muscles started to scream at you to stop but every time you tried, you got filled with another wave of rage. Fuck Bruce.
You had been so caught up that you hadn't noticed someone walk into the room. If you hadn't noticed the bright red hair, you would have assumed it to be another simulation. The tip of your sword stopped centimeters away from his eye. You had stopped yourself just in time.  
Bart pushed your sword down and watched your chest heave up and down from the exertion that you had put yourself through. He raised his eyebrows as you said nothing to him, just turned away and put your weapon back in it's place. Sweat soaked your shirt and you realized how lightheaded you were.
Your hands gripped onto the table in front of you. Bart sped over and sat right by your hands. He watched your eyes squeeze shut before popping open at his appearance. Dating the kid of Batman meant he had to get used to the brooding - tonight it seemed different. He was worried.
"What's wrong?" Bart asked. For the first time, he sounded timid around you. He could see the look in your eyes, the way you pushed yourself that night, even how your muscles tense with frustration. Something had gone haywire when you were home in Gotham. "Hey," he placed his hand over yours to get your attention.
"Bruce," you scoffed. Bart knew you didn't always get along with your father. You'd come to him ranting and screaming about how neglected you felt you whole life. Whatever it was this time, it really must have gotten you riled. "Tim told him we're dating and now he's riding my ass about it. He doesn't want us together."
Confusion struck his face. He had never given Bruce, or your brothers, a reason to dislike him when it came to dating you. He was always kind and loving, never willing to let anyone hurt you. Sure, he might have been a bit odd compared to the others, but he was the only one to get you to truly open up on that team.
Bart clenched his jaw. What was he supposed to say? Batman scared him, a lot. He saw the tremble in your china and the way that you squeezed your eyes shut. Bart placed his palm on your cheek and kissed the corner of your lips. He didn't want to lose you.
He couldn't.
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It seemed to be incredibly tense whenever you were around your family. You refused to talk to Bruce again and each time you were in the room with Tim everyone could feel how angry you were. He didn't mean to stir trouble when he told Bruce about your life with Bart, he didn't think he would react that badly.
Dick was trying his best to play mediator. He split you and Tim up whenever he got the chance and made sure to keep you and Bart together so he wouldn't get on your bad side as well. At the same time, Bruce continuously stopped in or asked Dick what was going on. Someone was always lurking over you when you were with Bart.
Whenever Batman was around, Bart became nervous - and distant. He didn't stand by you, sometimes he didn't even look at you. Though you knew that you couldn't blame him for being nervous around your father, it still made you angry. Not at him, never at him, but Bruce. He continuously fucked up your life.
The only way that Bart would ever get his approval was to defy death itself to be a hero. If Bruce was human and would put his life on the line, then he expected Bart to do so as well considering he had powers. His expectation was ridiculous, Bart risked his life every day right along side you on that team. Why did that not seem to be enough?
Bruce had another chat with you that evening. He stopped to the cave before you mission that evening. Unfortunately for you, it had been a bad time for him to come barging in without knocking. You and Bart had been tangled in your bed with needy kisses being shared.
You could still hear the coldness in his voice as he ordered Bart to leave. The tone he used when he yelled at you for still seeing him. The embarrassment you had when you left your room to join your team who had all heard you screaming match with your father. Bruce said nothing to your brothers, he only glared.
Dick assigned the teams for that night. You, Bart, and Gar were team beta. Bart looked hesitant to be near you again. To be honest, you couldn't blame him. Gar looked hesitant to be with you both, his eyes darted between you as if you had just broken up. That was far from the case - you weren't letting your father dictate you life like this.
As much as Bart knew this, it still made him weary. If there was one person that he never wanted to defy, it was the Bat. He still didn't know how you stood up to him so easily - swearing, calling him by his first name - he was your father. Then again, your relationship with him was far from perfect.
The mission itself seemed easy. A simple recon for your team - but just like nearly every recon mission that this team had - something went wrong. Things were going smoothly at first, at then gunshots started within the building and innocent screams being heard. You couldn't sit around while people were getting hurt.
So, breaking what you had promised Dick, you swooped in to save the people. Unfortunately for you, there were far more people than expected. Gar and Bart were out of sight and you couldn't rely on them in that moment. Your staff twirled around, taking down man after man. Bullets narrowly missed you, but at least the attention was off the civilians.
Bart had finally gotten back to you, he had been busy with his own men before he could join. "Impulse! Get the people out!" You shouted at him. Bart did as he was told, taking two at a time far away from the building and to safety while you held your own. Gar had finally caught up with you, too.
The two of you took out nearly every man in that building. All of them were unconscious or had surrendered. All except one. Gar could see the man behind you raise his gun, he yelled out trying to get your attention but it was too late. The trigger had been pulled and a bullet flew right towards you.
Bart felt like everything was happening in slow motion. He had just finished getting the last civilian to safety. When he ran back in he saw the bullet speeding at your chest. He pushed his legs faster than he had ever gone before to try and get you to safety as well. His hands out stretched to try and catch the bullet before it made contact.
Unfortunately for him, he had miscalculated the trajectory. Rather than catching the bullet in his palm, he had dove right in front of it. Bart stood there in shock as blood seeped from his chest. He looked over to you, fear in his eyes at the found. Had it not been for Beast Boy taking the shooter down, you would have been shot as well.
"Bart! No, no no," You panicked. He fell into your arms before hitting the ground. His blood soaked your hands as you put pressure on the wound to stop him from bleeding. Tears slipped down your face at the state of him. His face was contorted in pain and he was trying his best to be strong for you.
Gar dropped down to your side beside the both of you, worried as well. Bart placed his hand over yours and tried his best to smile up at you. "Speed healing, babe. You wouldn't have been so lucky." It was true, a bullet for him was an inconvenience for an hour, for you, it could have been a lifetime.
"I don't give a shit about your speed healing, Bart. I don't like seeing you hurt."
"Would have done it without it anyways. Anything to save you."
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When you showed back up to the cave with blood on your hands and all of your suit, Bruce immediately went into protective mode. He assumed it to be yours and was ready to bite the head off of anyone involved. As expected, his blame was ready to go directly to Bart.
It wasn't until he saw the redness in your eyes and the way Gar held onto Bart like his life depended on it did he realize that you weren't hurt. You were fine, pissed and worried, but you would live. Bruce didn't say anything as you brought your boyfriend to the med bay to get stitched up.
Bart was going to just fine. Like he said, he had speed healing - you didn't. Had that bullet pierced your skin instead, you wouldn't have held on long enough to make it back to the cave like he did. You were grateful for him, as much as you thought him an idiot to do so.
Dick had convinced you to go wash up while he was in the med bay. His wound was nearly healed and he was on his way to be back to new within the hour. His healing abilities still went forgotten by you and getting it through your head that he was going to be okay was hard to accept.
However, Dick was right. You needed to get cleaned up sooner or later and seeing the blood on your hands was only a harsh reminder of what had happened. The sound of the gunshot echoed through your head, the look on his face as he realized he didn't catch the bullet but got hit by it, they were etched into your brain.
No matter how hard you scrubbed, you still couldn't rid the images out of your brain. Rashly, you jumped out of the shower and through on the closet pair of sweats and hoodie - both of which belonged to Bart. He was okay, but you needed to see him to make sure that he really was.
Water still dripped down you, leaving a trail of foot prints from your room all the way to the med bay. However, as you reached the room, you stopped in your tracks. Through the glass you could see your father standing over Bart. Your boyfriend was nodding along to whatever he was saying - a hint of fear in his face.
What could Bruce possible have to say to Bart? After what he had done for you, there was no way that he could rip a new one into him. Bart had saved your life, and if Bruce still couldn't see how good of a person that he was, you weren't sure what would.
Without another thought, you swung the door open. Both the men turned towards you, both happy to see you there.
"What the hell are you doing?" You snapped to Bruce. The conversation that he had with you before the mission bounced around in you mind. In what world was it good timing to try and break you up once more right after your boyfriend was shot trying to save your life. "How dare you come to Bart after he's saved my life and try to -"
"(Y/N)," Bart cut you off. "It's okay." Your eyebrows furrowed at his words. Okay? How was it okay that Batman was trying to split you apart? How was it okay that your own father couldn't accept that you loved Bart? Nothing about this was okay.
Bruce said nothing. He moved to stand directly in front of you. His hand squeezed your shoulder for a brief moment before leaving the two of you alone. Still unsure of what that meant, you turned your attention back to Bart who was now fully healed and ready to go.
Slowly, he sat up in the bed until his feet dangled off the edge. To your surprise, he didn't look stressed or worried from his previous conversation. Instead, there was a small smile spreading on his lips. It grew as you ran into his arms. All the fear you had washed away being held by him.
"I was so scared," You whispered. Bart pulled away from you to kiss you. His lips molded perfectly against your. This was long awaited, far too long. You needed his kiss, his touch, you missed it in the short time that he had been injured. "What did he say to you?"
"Thank you," he answered. Your eyes widened in shock - Bruce never said thanks to anyone, especially to someone he hated as much as Bart. "For keeping you safe. And happy. For loving you when he can't."
"Bruce? My father? Batman?" You questioned. There was no way that he said anything like that. Not when he was so adamant on getting you broken up this whole time. Bart nodded. "So he doesn't want us broken up anymore?"
"Babe, if all it took was getting shot I would have done that a long time ago," Bart laughed. You smacked his shoulder, wishing that he wouldn't joke about that. It petrified you to have him shot right in front of you. The fear you had nearly wasn't worth your father's approval. "I'm kidding. Sort of. Not at all, actually. I'd do it again for you."
"No the hell you wouldn't," you scolded. "I swear Bart Allen for someone who thinks as quickly as you do, you make some dumb decisions."
"Part of my charm," Bart chuckled. He kissed your lips one more time before standing up. A coy look flashed in his eyes - that was never good from him. "There are some ways that you could make it up to me, ya know? I mean a man takes a bullet for you.. that sounds worthy of something special."
"Are you thinking kisses or a ridiculous amount of Big Belly Burger because I could go for either right now."
"Babe, it's like you read my mind."
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graphicabyss · 4 years ago
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I watched The Falcon And The Winter Soldier and I liked it more that I expected, although frankly I didn't expect much. Overall, I love the setting, the cinematography and the character development. The director and the writers did an excellent job. But it also sent me down an emotional roller-coaster and that's the thing I really need to talk about.
I know there are countless rants about TFATWS, Endgame, queerbaiting and poor MCU narratives but I've never really been hanging out in the fandom until recently so for me it's my first one and I need to get it off my chest. It's gonna be long.
It was interesting to see where the show's gonna take things but start to end there was an elephant in the room. It doesn't sit well with me the way they completely sidestepped the Steve Rogers issue. Like, "we didn't make this mess, so we're not gonna go there". And it's just wrong. You can't just avoid the subject altogether and pass it on for future writers to handle. Also, you see Bucky so sad and lonely it breaks your heart. And this inevitably made me think about Endgame and Cap's storyline. I didn't feel like writing it all down after Endgame but now all these thoughts and feelings came up again and I need to get it off my chest. If they ended it all at Endgame, and I thought they did, it would have been fine, sort of. We'd forgive some loose ends. But they didn't end it there and that makes them fully responsible for this mess. I mean, I didn't hate Cap's ending. After all, it could have been worse. Steve could get together with Sharon like in the comics and they probably considered it at some point but the reactions were so bad they backed down and dragged Peggy along. Still, the ending just felt forced, no matter how you look at it. The thing is, if I knew about it after the first movie, I'd rejoice. But at this point, after everything that went down after, it just doesn't feel right.  I love Peggy and I can't deny the dance scene made me flutter a little but now I wish this was Steve's way to keep his promise before going back. In the end, Peggy would be fine without him. She had a good life, she made a career and a family. We know that thanks to Agent Carter. And we got many cues that Steve and Peggy's relationship, as important as it was, was over. Her saying goodbye to him by destroying the serum, him carrying her casket... Yet, Endgame effectively undermined that basically erasing all of these events from existence and making Peggy just a prize for Captain America.  On the other hand, Bucky needed Steve the most. And the show made it clear how bruised and broken he was. Bucky and Steve's relationship was the closest of any relationship in the MCU. At that point it was clear Bucky was everything to him, the only one who could truly understand him. Steve lost him many times and every time he fought to bring him back, no matter how impossible it seemed. When Bucky was captured Steve went into an enemy base alone on a suicidal mission and saved him and everyone else. That's basically how he became Captain America. Then Bucky got killed in the war and it devastated him. Bucky returned as Winter Soldier and there was hardly any Bucky left in him but Steve nearly let himself be killed because he needed to save him and he trusted that James would not hurt him. When Bucky finally got to his senses, there was an ultimate war going on and in the Snap James fell to dust in front of Steve's eyes. It took 5 years to get him back. And as soon as Steve succeeded, he left him, along with the rest of his traumatized friends and the world in deep chaos, to be with Peggy in 1940's, thus throwing 12 years of his life away. It just didn't feel right. That does a disservice to both Steve and Peggy's storylines. But it's not just about Peggy or Bucky. Steve going back and living his life to return to that park as an old man has opened a rift with a host of questions. I tried to get to the bottom of it but it got me nowhere.  According to Russo, when Steve went back he created an alternate reality. He also retired as Captain America. First off, I think he just made that up after to cover up the mess. If that was the case, Cap would return to the designated spot and not be sitting on a bench like he was waiting there all along. But, like, even if it was alternate reality, it could not be that different, right? He wouldn't just live in Peggy's basement, would he? He knew about the things to come like, you know, the HYDRA thing, and being the man that he was, he couldn't just sit and do nothing. Especially when Peggy was one of the founders of the SHIELD. Captain America or not, Steve would do everything to make this world a
better place. Also, if Steve went back after he crashed that plane, that means there's another Steve still locked in ice, which Russo confirmed. Even more importantly, in Steve's timeline Bucky is still with Hydra being tortured. There's no way he could leave him there. So much for the 'quiet life'. Then there are the writers of Endgame who claim that Peggy's two children are fathered by Steve. Really? That directly contradicts the earlier version that the father is a soldier Steve saved, which is shown in Agent Carter. Seriously, guys, if you're gonna make up random bullshit at least get your stories straight first.   Fans love to make all sorts of theories to try and patch up the holes but the truth is, MCU is not just one mastermind's creation and the comics weren't either. It's bound to be a mess because it's created by dozens of writers and directors and each phase gets increasingly messier because it has to fit in with the 547 previously released movies and shows. I get that and I applaud the effort of Endgame but they really can't expect us to get involved with the characters only to see them being treated as an afterthought. And the thing is, I thought that it might be just me but after a quick survey of the fandom I realized that a lot of people feel the same way. If you look at the comment section of nearly any relevant video, you're gonna get top comments saying all these things. If Marvel listened just once maybe things would make more sense. And all these thoughts aren't necessarily what I wanted to see, but what would be right for the characters. And while I do love Stucky, I'm a reasonable shipper and I really didn't expect them to be canon gay or anything, I just wished they had at least spent some time together not fighting, just healing and catching up on their lives. Honestly, I don't always like the way people ship m/m characters in every show but this time it was really more than justified. The whole storyline going through Winter Soldier and Civil War was just massive queerbaiting. It was undeniably a love story, romantic or not. "Why do you ship male characters?" some people ask. Idk, maybe if the writers put half the effort into developing m/f relationships as they do m/m ones and not just randomly throw them together I might care about them. And MCU was terrible with romance. That traumatic kiss Steve had with Sharon Carter? In the comics, Steve did love Sharon but who cares? In MCU they met, like, twice. Mostly after Peggy's funeral. Peak romance. If they had to pick a new love interest they could go with Natasha. They cared about each other, they bonded in TWS and they were both dealing with some difficult issues. But they became just good friends, which I loved. Instead, Natasha got together with Banner? And then there's Wanda and Vision, which seemed like the most random of pairings with no buildup whatsoever. The wonderful world of heteronormativity where a witch/robot couple comes before a gay one. And the thing is, I only recently learned that there's some legit leverage to portray Bucky as gay. Bucky is based on two characters from the comics. Bucky Barnes was Steve's teen sidekick, kinda like Robin, so this origin was too weird for MCU. Instead, the writers used the origin story from a character named Arnie. It was a boy Steve grew up with, a boy who protected him from bullies, and a boy who kept inviting Steve to these double dates. A boy who was gay. Which wasn't explicitly stated but was pretty obvious. And this was in 1984. So making Bucky gay would be neither woke nor against 'canon'. It would be way overdue.  So with TFTWS it was nice to see Bucky recover and bond with Sam but to me the whole ending also felt a bit excessively positive and this time the queerbaiting felt even more intentional, almost as if the writers wanted to distract the discontent fans with a new shiny ship so they forgot all the things they were mad about. Like, of course I want Bucky to be happy but also I hate the way the show's pushing the idea that he just needs to get over losing Steve and move
on with his life already because surely all his problems come from his inability to trust people and not trying hard enough, and not from being brainwashed and tortured for 70 years and then losing the only person who loved and cherished him.
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missgarnet · 4 years ago
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Baby Daddies Chapter 1
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Pairing: ot7 x reader
Word count:2.6k
Genre: fluff, and a little bit of chaos
Summary:  So... no one tells you what to expect when you and your friends with benefits are about to have a child. (All plans are thrown out the window when your 7 closest friends find out they're going to become dads.)
Warnings: Jin is the ultimate mom friend, pregnancy, Jungshook, 
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4
Link to ao3
In hindsight, you probably shouldn’t have texted the guys that you were still sick as a way to avoid them. Especially when Jin was the biggest mom friend on earth and had insisted that they come to drop off some soup and make sure you were still alive. It wasn’t exactly a lie per se, but there was something you were definitely leaving out.
You slipped on a robe before answering the door, squinting at the bright lights in the hallway. “Y/N, no wonder you’ve been avoiding us. You look awful and your apartment is a wreck. When was the last time you cleaned, or opened the windows? That’s it you need fresh air and light,” Jin starts nagging as he pushes past you into your home.
The other boys trail behind him with various pots and tupperware containers that Jin had forced them to carry. They set them on the kitchen table as they start tidying the space around them. Your apartment wasn’t that messy, but you hadn’t been feeling well and the eight of you had a habit of taking care of each other when one of you was sick. It was a miracle you’d been able to have so much time to yourself before they insisted on taking care of you this time.
“Hey Y/N, why do you have these,” Namjoon asks holding up the box of pregnancy tests you left sitting out on the counter. “I thought you were on birth control.”
“I am, but it doesn’t always work so it’s good to have them just in case.”  You cursed under your breath, realizing that you had to tell them eventually.  “Joonie, you know how you said you wanted to be a dad a while back. Well… there’s like a one in seven chance that you’re going to be very soon”
“What do you mean one in seven?”
“I mean if you do the math, there’s seven of you guys, one of me, and now there’s a positive pregnancy test. I haven’t been with anyone else in years, and we’ve all been friends with benefits a little too often. And here we are.”
“So how are we going to figure this out?” Namjoon asks, trying his best to figure out how to handle the unusual situation the eight of you were currently facing.
Jungkook raised his hand, “We should do rock paper scissors to decide who gets to be dad.”
“That’s not a bad idea,” Jimin chimes in, “but is the winner or the loser responsible for all of this.”
The boys contemplate this for a moment as you sit there in shock, are they really about to decide who’s the father by rock paper scissors? Sure you’ve used it to make big decisions before, but this felt a little extreme by comparison. Somehow they’d decided to flip a coin to decide if having a kid with you was winning or losing. “Guys, I know this is a surprise but if you don’t want this you can just say so. I’m not going to force you to be there for anything just because we slept together.”
“It’s really not a surprise, Jin and the maknaes were making bets on how long it would take for you to tell us” Hobi interjected from his comfortable position on the couch.
“I took the test yesterday, how could you know before I did?”
Yoongi lifted his head from Hoseok’s lap, “Jungkook was worried because you kept feeling nauseous in the car every morning after breakfast. Taehyung was saying that your boobs felt bigger the last time you hooked up and then Jin pointed out that you’ve been gaining a lot of weight over the last few weeks. I wouldn’t be surprised if you were further along than you thought.”
“I don’t know if I should be insulted or feel flattered that you guys noticed all that.”
“Why not both?” Jimin suggested.
“You know what Jimin, that’s a great idea. I’m going to take it as a complement but also Jin might want to watch what he’s saying, especially since we both know who ate all the dumplings when I bought us dinner last week.”
The guys laughed as Jin began ranting about how he deserved more respect as the oldest, complaining about how you young people have no manners.
After a dinner where Seokjin had continued to sneak more and more food onto your plate, you were finally able to leave the table feeling as though you needed to be rolled into the other room.
“So what do we do now?” Namjoon asked, taking out a piece of paper to take notes.
“What do you mean, it’s friday night. We do the same thing every week.” Jungkook replied, oblivious to what Namjoon actually meant.
“First off, I don’t think that’s what they’re talking about,” you tried to explain.  “And I don’t think we’re going to be able to have our usual friday nights for a while.”
“Why not, we can still hang out the way we did before you got pregnant.”
“I know,” Namjoon added, “but some things are going to have to change because there’s parts of our routine that Y/N can’t really do anymore. Just think about what we normally do on friday nights.”
“We play video games, eat junk food unless Jin cooks, drink a beer and watch Yoongi cheat at monopoly.”
“And how does that end for you?”
“Making out on the couch, maybe sleeping with Y/N or one of you guys. And then there were a few times we all slept with each other.”
“Koo, I think what he’s trying to point out is that there’s some things I really can’t do right now.”
“So we can’t play mario kart anymore?” His sad little doe eyes were enough to melt anyone’s heart, and you found yourself falling for them time and time again. Of all the guys he was the hardest to say no to especially when he used that adorable pouty voice of his.
“Oh honey, of course we can.” You said as you took the corner of the couch, pulling Jungkook to sit with you. You tucked yourself between his arms as he pulled you on to his lap in a tight embrace.
You patted the spot next to you, waiting for one of the others to join you. What surprised you was how differently the guys were acting towards you even though they had just found out. Normally the eight of you would just fling yourselves onto the couch piling up into a group by literally throwing yourself onto one another. Instead they were being extra cautious as Jimin gently sank into the cushions next to you, taking your hand in his, he raised it to his lips pressing a soft kiss to the back of your hand.
Tae was acting equally as strange most of the time he would be the first one to throw himself into the pile, tightly wrapping his arms around the nearest person. This time he was careful not to put any of his weight on you as he curled up with everyone, resting his head on Jungkook’s chest he looked up at you with the brightest of his boxy smiles.
“I have an appointment tomorrow, I guess if one or two of you want to go with-”
The guys immediately erupted into arguments of why they should be by your side.
“I’ve known her longer.”
“I got with her before you did”
“Just saying, I’d be the best parent here.”
“That’s enough, Y/N needs one of us who can be there for her during all of this. I could take some time off work, or I could be a stay at home parent! Then you could keep working and I could be the best dad.” Jin argued.
“No, you’re not taking time off work for this," you sighed. “We are going to go about things the way we normally act, without making any major changes to how we are now. If you guys want to argue about this or come up with crazy ideas then you can stay home. I’ll take Yoongi and Jungkook if they want to go but the rest of you are staying.”
“Y/N, you need someone there who’s going to listen to the doctors and take notes on how to help with everything. Why shouldn’t that be me?  I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Jin, you started a betting pool because you thought I was pregnant instead of just asking, and the rest of you did nothing to stop him. Honestly I’d be okay with taking Hoseok before any of you, but I don’t want to explain to the doctor why my emotional support person keeps fainting.”
The next morning the three of you packed into the car with Jungkook in the back and Yoongi in the driver's seat still bickering with Jin over the packed lunches he kept forcing into the car. It seemed fine when he handed you the first bag, but as he continued to pile tupperware into the car insisting that his future child needed all the nutrition they could get.
You were trying your best to stay calm and not start overthinking everything, but maybe reading WebMD in the waiting room wasn’t helping. As the three of you entered the office you couldn’t help but worry, you weren’t ready for all of this. Even Jungkook’s amusement at the various medical equipment and diagrams in the room wasn’t enough to distract you.
“Hey, what’s this?” Jungkook asks, pointing at one of the 3D models lining the shelf.
“Well, Jungkook when a man loves a woman very much-” Thankfully whatever response Yoongi had planned ended up being cut off when the doctor opened the door.
“Hi Y/N, how’s everything going today?” Dr. Nam asked as you mumbled your usual reply. “I see you brought someone with you, or I guess I should say sometwo?”
You could feel the heat rising to your face as you tried to explain your current situation “Yes, these are my… um... My friends?”
“Ah, so that’s what the kids are calling it these days.” The doctor couldn’t help but chuckle as she took in your flustered expressions, “There’s nothing wrong with having multiple partners, especially when it’s a healthy relationship with people you care about. Besides, you’ve said enough during our last visits to prepare me for all of them showing up one day. I must say I’m a little shocked that the one with the nice shoulders isn’t here.”
“I didn’t say that much about them”
Dr. Nam just hummed in reply as she went back to reading through your chart. “With the information you have here, I think it might be best if we go ahead and do an ultrasound. You’ve had quite a few missed periods, and while it might be from stress that makes it a little more difficult to figure out a due date. This at least gives us an idea of where we’re at, and when we can expect certain milestones.”
It seemed as though she could sense the discomfort and worry as the odd machine was wheeled forward. It didn’t help that Jungkook kept nervously glancing at it as if it were some kind of wild beast. The gel was colder than you had expected, and you couldn’t help but shift in discomfort as the doctor spread it across your lower abdomen. Without a word Yoongi reached out and took your hand in his, doing his best to comfort you.
“I’m going to turn the sound on, please keep in mind that we might not be able to hear a heartbeat just yet and that doesn’t mean anything is wrong.” She turned on the machine and slowly guided the sensor across your skin. The room fell silent for just a moment before you could hear the quick little heartbeat sounding out from the speaker. You're not sure which one of you started crying first but it was clear that none of you were leaving with dry eyes.
She turned the screen towards the three of you showing you the image you had been holding your breath for. “It’s a little difficult to hear, but if I move this a little further to the right we have a second heartbeat.”
“It has two hearts?” Jungkook yelled in a sudden panic.
“Of course not, two heartbeats means two babies,” your words slowed as the realization began to hit you. “It is two of them right? Not like a mutant baby with two hearts- because I’d be okay with that too.”
Dr. Nam shook her head at the two of you already jumping to the panicking phase she’s seen so many first time parents going through. “No, you are not having a mutant baby. You have two perfectly healthy babies on the way and based on their development and a couple measurements I would say that you’re around 10 weeks along, maybe a little more. Everything looks good, but if you have any questions or concerns please call me at any time.”
As the three of you headed out of the office, Yoongi was the one to accept the little care package that the nurses had prepared for you. Meanwhile you and Jungkook were trailing behind him like little ducklings, still in shock from finding out about the twins. You soon found yourself being packed in the backseat of the car with Jungkook as Yoongi drove around aimlessly.
“Put the phone down,” Yoongi called from the front seat. “The two of you already look traumatized, we don’t need to make it worse by going on WebMD again.”
“It’s not WebMD, I was on google and I found a parenting blog for twins.”
He sighed as he glanced back at you in the mirror, taking in the look on your face as you continued to scroll through the website. “Why do I feel like that’s even worse?”
“Because, I’ve been to one appointment and I’m already failing as a mother. There’s all these things that we’re supposed to be doing that I didn’t even know about. Like journaling, we’re supposed to be writing things down so we remember after the baby comes. And I’m starting prenatal vitamins way later than I should have. I didn’t even know I was pregnant until a couple days ago. One of the blog women knew the week of. It’s been ten weeks and I hardly noticed anything different,”
“That’s it,” he said as he pulled the car over. “You are not going to sit here putting yourself down when we both know it’s not your fault. There are more important things than a journal or whatever some random stranger is saying on a pregnancy blog. What’s really bothering you?”
“What if I’m not a good mom?”
“If you're going to keep saying that I will call Namjoon and make him join this conversation.”
“No,” you whined. “He’s going to start off all sweet and encouraging, and then he’ll end up going on another philosophical rant about the meaning of life.”
The two of you laughed at the idea, Namjoon tried his best to be supportive of all of you but he often got lost in his own thoughts. “C’mon, what’s going on?”
“I’m just not ready for things to change so much. It’s only been a few days, everything is already so overwhelming, and it’s only going to get more complicated when all of them find out we’re having twins.”
“You don’t have to tell everyone yet. It’s okay if you want more time, I’m not going to say anything and Jungkook looks like he’s already been scared silent.”
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chemicalpink · 3 years ago
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Hey, I hope you are doing good this was a thing that was wondering me so there are lot of bts future spouse /soulmate/twinflame videos being made on youtube and honestly everyone is being psychic like it has become a shitshow and what was previously just for curiosity fun and entertainment are becoming extremely emotionally invested in the topic especially for maknae line soulmate it would be interesting if the can do a tarot reading or your spiritual experience why is the future spouse saga turning ugly and does universe what us to know something through it !? Because it's becoming pretty crazy right now
Okay so I believe that yes, the spiritual part has a lot to do behind this occurrence, but I also think its roots lay on psicosocial matters and honestly I could go on for days about this but I’ll try to restrict it to a few points that you’ve mentioned
Why all of a sudden everyone seems to be tarot readers/astrologers/psychic?
The capitalism behind celebrities and how does that play a part in what is going on?
Are these people accurate at all?
How does energy shifting play a part in this?
Is the soulmate journey even something a third person would be able to note?
But first a Disclaimer: this opinion/rant is based on my experience with spirituality, I am obviously a mere mortal, so I do not hold the absolute truth. Spirituality is a constant learning process and it is open to discussion and interpretation of each person. I am also now a proud sociologist graduate that specialises in a lot of the stuff that has to do with what anon is asking, I’m a social behaviouralist applied to the entertainment industry as well but I’ll also provide my resources in the end.
A/N: Some of you might not yet be ready to read all of this, if I see ANY of you trying to start beef with me, even after the disclaimer, I'm gonna block you. If you want to talk more about it or want to discuss it further, DO SO OFF ANON. ISTG you’ve been warned, I’ve been working on this for the longest time, it even has resources to back all of it up! I’m so glad anon asked, I’m done being diplomatic on this topic (I know people that usually ask stuff are so respectful and i love you guys for it, this note is for those people that regularly jump on my asks to stir things up)
You guys are in for a whole academic article if you decide to read this
SO FUN AND EXCITINGGGG Let us start with behavioural economics as our base to understand the whole phenomenon, it's such a broad and kinda complex concept (especially since I’m trying to extrapolate it to this particular scenario) so let me do my best. It has a lot to do with trend following, although at least to me, it's unclear how exactly this content came to be (soulmate readings, channeling messages, etc) I am guessing it had something to do with an intersectionality between the general spirituality boom that we’ve met with during the pandemic and some person that just as any other marketable opportunity, saw a bridge between fandom life and this spiritual life (both prominent trends in the last two years or so) and honestly, it worked perfectly, whatever their initial intentions were, they threw out a new “product” and it kind of sold itself, two different trends coming together… turned into a behavioural game theory where if you played the part that allows your content to be consumed, you’ll get rewarded for it. In more simple words, tarot meets fandoms (alternatively, tarot meets BTS) is great as it is! but the fan behaviour (which we’ll talk about in a bit) positions the most private parts of the celebrities’ lives to be much more interesting than things that we are already able to see (personal experience, love readings do so much better than idk career readings and it all comes down to behavioural trends of perceiving ‘love’ as something very intimate)
Now, this is where we’ll begin to talk about capitalism as a whole, even in non-monetary systems like social media, where it takes more of a rewarding system via likes, views, reblogs, etc. The whole principle of us living in such a system is being aspirational, we see others profiting off of something, we might want to reach out and do the same so we can profit ourselves, which honestly, I think is what happened with the whole BTS soulmate readings boom, they get a lot of attention, and as a basic market law, as demand goes up and a few people that initially did these readings are no longer capable to satisfy the need of the people wanting to know all the tea, there are market opportunities for other people to do the same thing and increase the offer, although since this whole theory is behavioural, it is very context-dependant, which ends up not following the principle of the consumers being rational about how much and what content they consume, they just sort of consume all of it, regardless of whether the content creator is qualified to offer such content or not, which ultimately only adds onto a never ending cycle of more people claiming they are tarot readers/astrologers/psychics and fear nothing because this is the internet, you don't really have to enter any qualifications to be able to create content, whether someone is reliable in internet terms is basically all about how many likes they’ve got (which is why I always tell you guys to please consume content responsible).
When it comes to accuracy- I guess that’s the hardest part of all, we can’t just have pointers that would automatically tells us if someone’s craft is valid or not, since everyone’s craft is different all craft is valid to a certain extent (you can easily find scammers of course but that’s another story) what we can have are personal standards and deciding what content to consume or whose content to consume, but that’s entirely a personal decision and since so many people are invested in it- it seems really hard that these “market tendencies” might change any time soon. On that same note of accuracy, I really feel the need to talk about a major occurrence I’ve come across in this whole soulmate scene, minors. Now, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being a minor and approaching spirituality (I was very much a minor when I started) but there’s a huge difference between just playing around and deciding to create content for the whole world to have access to. Of course I’m aware not all tarot readers in the BTS fandom are minors, and ARMY is very diverse and even if they were only minors it would be wrong to invalidate them, but we can’t ignore the statistics of it when touching this particular topic, according to 2020 data, 50,31% of ARMY are below 18 years old, and 42,59% are between 18-29 but why is this important? because the exact historical and economic moment we are living in mainly impacts these two age groups, thus making all 92,90% of ARMY a potential target to consuming or falling in a behavioural game theory of creating this content without them necessarily being qualified for it. But hey, why do you keep talking about the importance of being qualified? Glad you asked, creating spiritual content all comes down to one amazing term: accountability.
And this will explore two main phases of it, one applicable for that 50,31% that could potentially be drawn to create spiritual content and other for the 42,59% that could potentially be dragged to creating that content without much spiritual knowledge. For the first one, it has a lot to do with cognitive aspects, young people tend to do stuff without much further thought about how their actions impact other people, which, as they should, they are kids, they shouldn’t have to worry too much about emotional responsibility as us adults do, furthermore, they are in life stages where they can’t really comprehend many abstract concepts that we later learn in life, and spirituality is one of those concepts, so they tend to just have fun with it with no regards on how their content might impact other minors (this is where the whole feeding a false scenario that is potentially delusional in exchange of more views, likes comes into play) on a more spiritual level, they also aren’t able to comprehend the boundaries of the celebrities they’re reading for, us readers have to always be careful about the information we give out since it is not ours to give. As for the second group, some of this is still applicable since theorists consider a full cognitive maturity until 23 years of age, but since it is very intersectional itself, i would found it more to a spiritual responsibility, since they are young adults, and if they haven’t been spiritually guided as kids, they’re most probably eager to learn and just awakening yet to some of them the drive to this spirituality is content creation instead of inner work, so they get their hands on a tarot deck, might kind of read a few things, call it a day and start reading for BTS (note: not all of them, I’m aware)
As for the maknae line being the most sought out people with this content, I guess it kinda makes sense now that I’ve said all of the information above, maknae line is closest to the age group of 92,90% of ARMY, so they instantly become more marketable to this content creation and the whole Game Theory that we are seeing. With all that being said, and just adding a note coming from my own spiritual experience, soulmates in any form are a difficult topic for a third person to prode, which is why I, personally, tend to not touch that topic, love is one hell of a concept, especially since we all have different conceptions of love and interpersonal relationships. I do know for a fact that there’s only so far we can go in terms of fated connections, like with astrology, but even then, we would have to know their birth times exactly (so we can check for any indicator or a soulmate connection), and/or compare BTS with the rest of the world’s population in order to accurately tell if someone has a soulmate synastry/overlay/composite with them. Also, soulmate journeys are intimate and we are all just fans, what right do we even have to look for things that do not and will never belong to us?
This is why I’m always telling you guys to PLEASE consume content responsibly! Really! Us content consumers also have our part to play that can help us get more accurate, more drama-free content
REFERENCES (what? you thought I was joking? they’re in alphabetical order)
ARMYCENSUS 2020
Loewenstein, G., O’Donoghue, T., & Rabin, M. (2003). Projection bias in predicting future utility. Quarterly Journal of Economics, 118(4), 1209-1248.
March, J. G. (1978). Bounded rationality, ambiguity, and the engineering of choice. The Bell Journal of Economics, 9(2), 587-608.
Markus, H. R., & Kitayama, S. (1991). Culture and the self: Implications for cognition, emotion and motivation Psychological Review, 98, 224-253.
Mazar, N., Amir, O., & Ariely, D. (2008). The dishonesty of honest people: A theory of self-concept maintenance. Journal of Marketing Research, 45(6), 633-644.
Murphy, S. T., & Zajonc, R. B. (1993). Affect, cognition, and awareness: Affective priming with optimal and suboptimal stimulus exposures. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 64, 723-729.
Samson, A., & Voyer, B. (2014). Emergency purchasing situations: Implications for consumer decision-making. Journal of Economic Psychology, 44, 21-33.
Schwartz, B. (2004). The paradox of choice: Why more is less. New York: Ecco.
Shah, A. K., & Oppenheimer, D. M. (2008). Heuristics made easy: an effort-reduction framework. Psychological Bulletin, 134(2), 207-222.
Thaler, R. H. (2015). Misbehaving: The making of behavioral economics. Allen Lane.
Thaler, R. H. (2008). Mental accounting and consumer choice. Marketing Science, 27, 15-25.
Wood, W., & Neal, D. T. (2009). The habitual consumer. Journal of Consumer Psychology, 19, 579-592.
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neonponders · 3 years ago
Text
WIP Wednesday
Thank you for tagging me @lazybakerart 💗💋
I’ve got two big writing projects on my plate this week lol but one thing I’m kind of indulging is a break-up/getting back together fic that I actually started in this post, but I’ll share what I have so far underneath the cut ~
(and excuse me while I overshare, because I’m still stupidly proud of this The Mummy_au post that I made if anyone wants a taste of that)
Tagging (if you want) ✨ @ghostofjellyfishforgotten , ✨ @smashmouth-hargrove , and ✨ @withoneheadlight 
(also just a heads up for the wip below: it’s once again me exploring my own asexuality through Steve, but I don’t know how far I’m going to go into it. Still, that might be a content warning people may need if they’re sex-repulsed 🌹)
Ch. 1
Sex with Billy was fine. Good, even.
When they finally moved past every look and touch being a threat veiled in a tease, Steve enjoyed looking at Billy. He enjoyed looking at Billy and discovering those California eyes already on him. He liked Billy’s hands. The man had beautiful hands; strong, thick fingers but...somehow elegant.
He liked Billy’s body, even though he sometimes worried that the guy seemed determined to break it ten different ways. Cigarettes, alcohol, excessive working out, and sometimes all at the same time.
Sex didn’t always mean Steve got to cum. Usually he didn’t, actually. But he enjoyed Billy’s kisses on his neck, and the taste of his tongue, and - admittedly - he loved just having all of Billy’s attention enraptured on him. Steve didn’t mind taking his dick inside because once he got used to it, that felt surprisingly good. When he managed the pleasurable sparks and sensational tingles that mounted into something explosive, he understood why sex was great. But for the more frequent, calm nights, he’d come to think of it as a weird yet pleasant massage.
So he took it. Because it was easier on his hands and knees, for one, and because Billy had a control complex. And Steve could hide his lack of enthusiasm.
Not to say that Billy was selfish or careless. Far from it, Billy Hargrove was an incredibly doting lover. Big surprise, there. Considering how the guy
Well
Existed.
Steve couldn’t really blame Billy for never noticing that he could go a long time without sex. Because Steve liked resting his hand on Billy’s chest while they watched a show or movie. It didn’t matter how much bare skin he had access to. In fact, the more coverage, the better. A clothed body is better to cuddle with than skin that can get sticky or irritated.
Steve liked kissing. He’d always liked kissing. Kissing was the reason he’d assumed he was like everyone else: the desire to kiss, crushes and girlfriends, masturbating, even the giddiness of sex with someone new.
But something fizzled out very quickly in Steve’s brain. Once hands and intent started moving beneath clothing, Steve just...didn’t want it. Suddenly a lot of things popped into his brain that he’d rather be doing. But he persevered because he loved Nancy, and her blooming sexual prowess and bravery was sexy.
Fun.
Billy was a whole big bag of new with an edge of scary that turned out to be more endearing than Steve thought possible. So it was easy to go like that for a while.
Normal.
Eventually he had to admit to himself that he didn’t like taking showers at 1am because he didn’t enjoy being covered in his own, and Billy’s, sweat. He didn’t like feeling the drips on his skin or the tackiness of too many skin oils on his hands.
He hated admitting to himself that he felt relief whenever Billy went out of town for work. He missed Billy, of course, but a lot of things had begun to snowball together in Steve’s life: changing jobs, managing bank accounts and savings, and there were a lot of truths Steve was facing outside of his relationship.
He was tired. Damn tired. He spent many days off wondering if people in their twenties feel this tired all the time or if it was just him. It must just be him. Because Steve sees Robin just as much as he doesn’t. She’s got goals.
And Billy
Billy has big dreams. He’s ready to work damn hard and already is. That’s why he uses his hefty gas money funds, to travel around. Scout the areas. Steve even drove him to the airport once, so Billy could really gain some distance over the weekend. Expand his network.
As if the universe knew, some bigwig passing through Hawkins on their way to Chicago ran right into Billy. A bigwig looking for a handsome, charismatic, young guy to mentor. It really couldn’t be more perfect than divine intervention. They’re Billy’s inlet to the business. Modeling, acting, freaking UNICEF ambassadorial work if he wants to feel extra important. If he gets big enough to have his face mean something around the world.
Within one conversation, he’s got a business card, and an appointment in a Chicago skyscraper next week to take measurements and do a rudimentary photo shoot. The manager warns him that it’s the agency getting to know him, but like any job interview, it’s his chance to interview them right back. Billy likes that a lot—feeling like he has a stake in something instead of just being a corporate pawn. And maybe he eats right out of the manager’s hand, but it’s still a shot. And he’s taking it.
He immediately goes to Steve’s work, fired up from seeing a future for the first time like he finally got the right prescription glasses. The only caveat is that Billy has to move out of Hawkins, which isn’t even a flaw, really. It’s as close to perfect as life’s ever been for him.
Steve can only listen quietly as he sits at the table in the break room. Because Billy’s got big dreams that are already coming true. Every detail of his enflamed speech is given over pacing feet; he can’t even bother to sit at the table. Billy’s got so much energy he’s already mentally and emotionally out the door.
Steve…isn’t. His mental health has been on a downward slope since before they graduated, and it won’t allow him to reach anywhere. He doesn’t have any dreams to steer him in any direction anyways.
Billy’s rant begins to wind down about what he wants to do; his fire about his dreams and his motivation simmers down to an even boil. Steve’s impressed and already proud of the person Billy will become, but Steve can also hear Billy’s frustration with him and their relationship.
For not keeping up.
Steve’s…kind of never been able to keep up. In bed or in life.
And perhaps the saddest part is that Steve doesn’t even have it in him to fight for it. For them. He doesn’t feel worthy enough to hold Billy back. So he doesn’t.
Billy snaps a little, “Why aren’t you saying anything? I’ve been talking about this for the last two years! Steve?”
He’d gotten distracted by looking at his backpack hanging on the wall. Steve’s throat hurt. Two years? God, it’s really been two years already…
He pinched his fingertips over the table as he began, “Billy, I support you. I know you can get there—wherever it is you want to be. I’m not going to tell you to stop or slow down. You’re going somewhere. But I’m…”
He took a breath to finally say it. “Not. I don’t know what I’m doing, and I don’t think I have the energy to figure it out any time soon. You should go.”
Steve can see the disappointment sinking through Billy’s features. And the anger that he’s so used to throwing up as a shield. Billy has so much energy coursing through him as it is, Steve can’t blame him for swinging right into the direction of livid.
The real surprise comes from how soft he speaks. No yelling. No hitting the table. No wrenching Steve up by his green uniform vest. They were long past those outbursts. Which…really just confirmed Steve’s decision. Billy had come a long way. He could go so much further.
“That’s what you have to say? Just like that…you’re really giving up on us?”
Steve knows he’s gaping like a stupid fish. But it isn’t just like that, is it? Billy’s been revving his engines to get the hell out of Hawkins ever since he got here in the first place. Steve tries to say as much, but Billy cuts him off.
“I thought you’d be excited for this. You should be hauling me out of here to pack my bags.”
Steve tries to offer a small smile, but his voice betrays him. “I thought I kind of am? I didn’t take you for the long distance type.”
It’s not the response Billy wants. That should make Steve feel better than it does; the blatant display that Billy wants more of Steve. His excitement, his attention, maybe his companionship…
Steve doesn’t know what he wants—or rather, he does. That’s the issue. Billy’s wants and Billy’s problems can all be resolved by leaving one critical piece behind.
Steve.
Some more things are said, but Steve doesn’t do well on the spot. Especially when the limelight is Billy. Steve fails the tests and he fails the interview. Billy storms out, leaving Steve at the table, pinching his fingertips white before he unconsciously glances at his backpack again.
The backpack full of apartment lease papers. The papers Steve’s already signed because even with his insecurities, the mornings he woke up to discover Billy spooning him after having returned in the middle of the night were his best days. Because Billy’s silly insistence on hand poured coffee was his favorite drink. Because Billy was funny and weird like an artist and loony like a nerd with his video games, and Steve knew—or at least hoped that—Billy loved him the day he started holding his hand while driving that stupid, loud, beloved Camaro—
Because Steve’s heart was a magnet. It stayed where it landed and tugged back even when pulled away.
All he’d needed was Billy’s autograph to be given the keys. Keys to the rest of their lives, if Billy wasn’t already so far away.
Ch. 2
Robin gripped Steve’s arm, hard. A gargled sound escaped him as he grimaced and tried to pry her hand off. Her other hand pointed at one of the catalogues on the store’s many counters. When he invited her with him to pick out glasses, he hadn’t expected to walk out of the freaking optometrist’s office with bruises…
Nor had he thought he’d see a familiar face in the catalogue. Plenty of models were looking editorial chic, advertising that anyone could look as good in whatever glasses they chose.
Except Billy really did look good. The picture was just a vague image outside, the camera focused on Billy’s three-quarter profile gazing off past the photographer.
“I didn’t expect him to actually be working this fast,” Robin admitted. “It’s been…what? Seven months, give or take? I thought casting calls for models were competitive.”
“Not if you look like Billy,” Steve huffed with a quiet mixture of humor, sadness, and just a sprinkle of spite. A sprinkle of jealousy, if he was being honest with himself. The self-help book tucked under the covers of his bed talked about honesty. So he admitted honestly, “He looks that good and knows how to stand out in a room…good for him.”
He could see in his periphery Robin looking up and scrutinizing him. “Really?”
Steve shrugged with a nod. “Yeah. What’s the other option? Him struggling for work?”
Robin sighed and plucked a display set of glasses at random to try on and occupy herself. “That’s big of you, but everyone wants something cathartic. It’s annoyingly impressive that he landed the front cover of a magazine in less than a year.”
Steve opened the catalogue to give them both a reprieve. “You wanna get food after this? Take your mind off the audition?”
For all the good being a band geek did, Robin had experienced her own humbling experiences over the last few months. Like failed auditions to be in city orchestras. She and Steve were feeling very stuck in Kansas while Billy gallivanted around Oz.
• • • • • • •
The plot gets messy because years will actually go by, and Steve and Robin get married so that they can share insurance benefits (and be safe in their bi/lesbian open relationship, buy a house together, etc. It’s the life/happiness security Steve wants but obviously there aren’t any romantic feelings).
Of course this is when Billy happens to reenter Steve’s life. He’s got some hot-shot model he’s been seeing, and apparently Steve is married so there’s the added dash and twist of ~ cheating ~
I’ve been in some kind of mood, all right.
If you made it this far, thank you for reading lol.
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blubberingmess · 4 years ago
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[Barnes Duo] Sebastian Stan x teen!Actress!reader
Summary: an interview with Sebastian Stan and (Y/n) (L/n), also known as the Barnes Duo.
(C/n) = Character name
*No matter what color your skin is, it won't change the fact that (C/n) is Bucky's sister (movie) in the future you'll find out ;).*
Warnings: none
Note: There's no romance. Just a close friendship between you and the actor, as well as the role you're both playing; brother and sisters. No"WhAt ArE yOu dOinG StEp bRo~" none of that-- in the future maybe?
Edit: This is a draft and I don't know how i feel about this. Barnes duo? Seriously? I'm currently writing a mini series right now.
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"Hi, it's nice to finally meet the Barnes Duo," the interviewer greeted, smiling excitedly at the both of you. Sebastian Who is sitting next to you on his own 'director's chair' answered with his own charming smile, "nice to meet you too."
You grin. "They actually called us that?" You've heard and seen posts about it but didn't actually knew it's officially what the fans/media calls the both of you.
"Yes actually. They just love the sibling relationship between Bucky and (C/n) Barnes." She said. "That leads to my first question; how did you two made it so natural in the movie? Like the two of you are actually siblings, especially with the videos that's currently trending right now."
There's a lot of video that's going viral of you and Sebastian, most of them are off-set, eating lunch together and having conversation to the side as you wait for your next scene.
*You and Seb are standing a few meters away from the camera, both facing each other. You're rambling about something while Sebastian listens, nodding his head and opening his mouth a few times.*
> the two are just cute! I can't!!!
> I'm telling you guys. They're long lost siblings! 💕
> Currently wishing I have a brother who would look at me like Sebastian is looking at (Y/n). He's listening so intently but we all know she's just ranting about Scooby-doo
> @^^ I know right?!
Some are just the two of you bickering and creating bloopers while on-set
*One scene where it's supposed to be very serious and talking about an important mission with Steve and Bucky.
You: *firmly looks at Chris in the eyes* I could sneak in through the vent; spy on Dr. Vlad as he takes his first dump of the day. Will also send you his nudes om the way--
Seb: (Y/n)!
You: *turns to seb* Don't worry, brother. I'll send you a copy as well... *snort-laughs*
Seb: *Trying so hard not to smile*
Chris: *watches*
Seb: *started chuckling and shakes his head**
> (Y/n)'s laugh is contagious. I love her ♡
> Look at Sebastian's face. He really tried so hard not to laugh 😂❤
> Chris looks so done right now 😭😭
> Sebastian's face went from 'Stop it. Im not playing games' to 'why do you look so cute? I can't stay mad at you' ❤
You grinned, looking up at Sebastian who smiles back at you. "That's just how we are in general," You started, looking back at Sheryl. "It didn't feel like we're acting to be honest. We actually hit it off the first day and became very close."
Sebastian nodded his head in agreement, recalling the first day you've met months ago before shooting the movie.
"Yeah. (Y/n) is naturally a brat and far more younger than me. I instantly feel like a big brother whenever I'm with her because she's my responsibility-- practicing dialogues and all that; getting to know each other and perfecting our roles. And she just... instantly gotten attached to me."
Sebastian glance at you with a warm smile on his face, fondness behind his eyes. Ever since you introduced yourself to him as his costar, he always would look at you with such warmth like a loving brother would to his baby sister.
You good-naturedly scoffed. "I instantly got attached to you? Hold up, dude. You're the one who's gotten attached to me; acting like a big brother off-set and being all protective and stuff." You pointed out, not bothering to deny the fact that he called you a brat.
"Is it true?" Sheryl asked, averting her green eyes to Sebastian who shrugs his shoulders.
"Not really--"
"It's true," you chimed in. Sebastian sighs and flirted his eyes back at you with an unamused look, only laughing inn response.
"One time I got hit on the face with a punching bag-- softly might add-- after I missed a move, Sebastian's the one who came running next to me and asking if I were okay. The look on his face was priceless!"
"What? That was one time. It looks painful."
"Nope It's not. Remember that time when I need to jump down a that tall platform because my stunt double can't? You're the one who refused saying it's 'too dangerous' despite the safety cables. You look so worried!" You laughed and Sheryl chuckled, imagining it.
"What can I say? This girl grows on me; managed to sneak in my heart without me even knowing it." Sebastian wrapped an arm around your shoulder for a side hug. You felt your heart jumps in happiness, smiling up at him.
"I'm actually sad the first movie came into an end faster than I expected."
"Sebastian!"
And that's how the media explodes with excited reactions, ready for the next upcoming movie regarding Bucky Barnes and (C/n) Barnes; their untold story.
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i-am-a-whimsy-boy · 3 years ago
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I've been getting more followers recently (for some reason), so I thought I'd take the opportunity to introduce myself properly and explain as best I can how I organize this blog.
Hello! Hi! I'm Beth!
My pronouns are he/him.
I'm just a horribly disorganized, socially awkward, asexual Canadian university student trying my best to stay sane. Emphasis on trying. Attempts are being made.
Murdoch Mysteries has been my main source of serotonin for the past four years or so, and I don't see that changing anytime soon. George Crabtree and Inspector Brackenreid give me life. All I want from this show is a hug between both of them. I'm still waiting. It'll happen. One of these days.
This is a sideblog, so follows, likes and replies come from @arty-tardigrade, which is my main art blog. (Go check it out if you like!)
(Blog explanations under the cut)
My URL comes from this comedy skit video I randomly came across a while ago and just absolutely fell in love with (this). At one point, he says "but I digress, as I am a whimsy boy" and for some reason, that line just stuck with me.
My profile picture is a frame I drew of George Crabtree when I made an animatic of that one vine. My header is George and Brackenreid, because I love their father-son dynamic and I will never stop hoping they hug one day.
I write an unholy amount of fanfiction, and post a small selection of it over on AO3. You may know me as the person responsible for the Hogwarts AU. Or the Newsies AU. Or maybe the College AU. If you're reading this in the future, there's probably more options. I make a lot of AUs. I haven't even posted half of the AUs that I've made. They just pop into my head when I'm feeling stressed out, and, as you may have guessed, I get stressed out a lot.
Do you do asks?
Yup! You can send me asks all you want; I love hearing from people! It might take me a while because sometimes I think I've replied to something but it turns out that I only thought about replying and didn't actually do it in reality, but I will eventually answer. Send me anything you want, Murdoch Mysteries related or not!
How do you tag?
Most posts I make myself are about Murdoch Mysteries and I tag them as such. For reblogs, I usually use the tag space as space to make comments for some reason, and I usually don't end up tagging Murdoch Mysteries there (maybe I should though).
During active airtime, any posts on my blog (original posts and reblogs) will be tagged with spoiler tags, which I format as "mm(season number in roman numerals) spoilers" (eg. mmxv spoilers). Go ahead and filter that tag if you don't want to get spoilers!
If I'm reblogging something from a fandom that isn't Murdoch Mysteries, I'll generally tag that fandom, in case anyone wants to know what it is.
I've got a couple of tags that I use to "organize" the posts on this blog beyond just the fandom (I'll be updating this as needed):
#don't mind me guys: personal stuff that's only about me.
#HR would have a field day with Murdoch: long posts (rants) that I do about how much of a health/safety nightmare Detective Murdoch is. Yes, I have made multiple.
#you can't teach an old moron new memes: I occasionally make memes and this is the trash heap where they all go.
#*Cue Mail Time Song from Blue's Clues*: when I get sent asks, answers are tagged with this.
#TPBGC: Stands for The Parental BrackenGeorge Conspiracy. Brackenreid is George's adopted father, I don't make the rules. I use this tag whenever there's vaguely parental energy between the two of them in a post.
#incorrect murdoch mysteries: Occasionally, I just drop everything and become an incorrect quotes blog, and those are tagged with this.
#Crabtriq: The ship between George Crabtree and Nuniq. They are romantic endgame, I'm telling you. They've kissed. Nuniq said he would tell George what his name means "another time." It's happening. If people poke me enough, I might finish that Crabtriq slow burn I started writing....
For longer text posts I make, I almost always bold important lines and I usually add a TL;DR to make it easier to read. If there's a way to make it even easier for you, please let me know! I'm always looking to make the reading experience better for everyone.
So yeah! That's me, and welcome to the blog! Nice to have you here!
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delicatebluebirdruins · 4 years ago
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Heartland s14 ep 1 take 2
tumblr was supposed to save my previous post to drafts so I could add to it (and did not do it which I did not realise until I looked at my notifications and someone had reblogged it in other words OOPS sorry)
to repeat myself anyone criticising Graham for his decision to leave and the timing of it will be blocked, and I wish Graham himself all the best for his future projects
under a read more because spoilers, a rant with some swearing and lots of rambling so it got long
so first I’m going to go off topic a little bit and rant because this hurt a lot when it happened. Last September I woke up one morning to the news that my favourite character (Bellamy) from the numbers show was shot and killed by my other favourite character (Clarke) for the most stupidest reason ever (she killed Bellamy over a sketchbook which he wanted to give to the bad guys... to protect her daughter... AND THEN SHE JUST BOUNCED AND LEFT THE SKETCHBOOK THAT MIGHT HAVE ENDANGERED HER DAUGHTER ON THE FLOOR NEXT TO THE BAD GUYS THAT WERE STILL LIVING). So i was still dealing with the death of my favourite character and the subsequent dragging through the dirt of both Bellamy he died alone thinking everyone hated him. No one really mourned him, he was all but forgotten except for a few throwaway comments that ‘he was right’. No one felt regret about not believing him. No one spoke up and said they wished he could have been here on the beach at the end. He was erased from the narrative and a minor character who died in S3 and whose story had already been wrapped up overshadowed him (and almost everything else that happened in the already shitty finale*- like seriously all of humanity was forced to join a universal consciousness and you don’t have to know a lot about science fiction to know it is really bad). (and everyone thought he was dead and his gf was ready to go on a killing spree about it for revenge but when they found he was actually dead they all just shrugged it off and said he died the moment he joined the bad guys when they were standing in the presence of another bad guy who was on that side for a lot longer and was only a recent turn coat) and Clarke who was the hero of this show was turned into cause of all of humanities sins and not a hero who tried (and then gets rewarded by being let to stay with her “friends” on a beach unable to bear children because aliens turned up as a master race and killed all of humanity and those that were left were made barren? yes in the last ever episode of a seven season show we got introduced to aliens- honestly putting all I know of season 7 into words like this still makes no sense)
*link to the youtube video The 100 Finale... May We Never Meet Again: Talis the person who made the video went off you know if you are morbidly curious
Bellamy was one of my favourite characters and he was done hella dirty. And Ty was another and he got given multiple love letters in just one episode and probably more to come as season 14 progresses. (I laughed as yesterday a youtuber called Hannah King made a video about the first episode of season 14 and I read the comments one of which saying that Ty was done dirty by the writers and I just??? I was hella tempted to put that rant above this part in a response to that comment good lord)
so onto Ty and Heartland
I watched the entire of season 13 in a day and cried a little when Ty and Amy got shot... and it hurt but was also very cathartic to watch because the worry and care was brought to the forefront like Ty not even realising he was shot and his panic was a very real moment
so when fandom started speculating about Ty’s death my only thought was if he did die he would do it with a complication with the gunshot wound and I was right. But it didn’t hurt as much to think about because I trust the writers even if they have made some missteps in past seasons. However, because of Bell and the faith I had in the writers back then (I trusted the writers until I remembered after the death because main character hater was promoted to head writer) I was also worried because of that.... Heartland is essentially the only ongoing show that I’m still actively watching and not just searching for spoilers.
I rewatched the first episode of season 14 twice (will probably do so again maybe)
Ty’s death was handled well, the blurring of the doctor delivering the news and Amy mentioning that the funeral was a blur (I kind of hope we get a flashback)
So it goes without saying the timing of Graham leaving and Ty dying is hard because of Covid-19 and the loss (all forms like normal routines, lives and you know what i mean I hope) that comes with it.
Because of everything in real life and the real life grief a lot of people have been going through, one of the many parts during the episode that made me tear up and cry a little was Grandpa Jack’s and Amy’s heart to heart in the fishing cabin. It was a very real moment the mentioning of how difficult Grandma Lyndy’s death was for death despite it being expected and how unexpected Ty’s was. And Jack saying “there is no right way to grieve” is possibly the most important part of it as there is no right way, and grief is not linear its not a straight line it will be very hard to deal with for a long while.
“keep me in your heart“ was a very strong start and I can’t wait to see what comes next (I hope at some point we see some old friends and Scott turn up and react to Ty’s death). And I am so glad that the cast and crew are talking about it in videos as a message to fans
in the end Ty was loved completely by the family and he loved them the same. the rest is confetti
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tonydadisbestdad · 5 years ago
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It’s Positive
Peter ParkerxReader
Dad!Tony
Word Count: 1,987
Summary: Pregnant by accident and dad tony finds out
A/N: this is stupid but I wanted to write something dumb so here it is. Sorry if formating it weird. I’m posting from my iPad bc I can’t be bothered to use my computer rn but it would have made it worth it if I had bc I can’t make this look how I want to on “mobile”. Whatever. Also sorry I haven’t written in ages, as some of you know, I work more than 40 hours a week and don’t normally get home until after 8 pm and am tired as hell. But since I’m fiinally quarentining (is that even how you spell that is it even a word?) myself I decided to try some writing instead of watching hours of tik tok videos. Enjoy! Sorry for my rant.
Perspiration collected on your forehead as you rode the elevator. Pain twinges in your abdomen as the pressure begins to become too much.
You had to pee. Of course you had to pee. You drank half a gallon of water when the thought occurred to you.
You ran through the penthouse, clutching your purse protecting the contents from jumping out, praying your bladder would not release it’s contents before you were seated on that throne.
Nervousness overtook you as you shut and locked your bathroom door behind you. You riffled through your bag for the thing you'd just returned from buying.
With shaking hands you unpackaged it.
After waiting the designated time, plus 10 minutes out of fear, you finally worked up the courage to look at it.
Your heart sank seeing the positive symbol. Your 19 years of life suddenly feeling like it all just ended.
You couldn't believe how absolutely stupid you were.
Grabbing your phone from your bag, you sent a text. Knowing you wouldn't be able to have the conversation in person.
“Pete, I got a meeting to get to. Do you got the rest?” Tony asked. They were in the lab, working on another new device.
“Yeah Mr. Stark, I should have it done by the time you get back.” Peter answered.
Tony left with a quick see ya later and was gone. Peter on the other hand returned to working.
Until his phone went off. He saw it was from you and opened it. His stomach dropped. There was no way. You were joking with him. You had to be.
All the message was, was a picture of a pregnancy test box and 2 words. “It’s positive.”
He thought about that one night a few weeks ago that you spent together. It was an event night, both of you required to be there per Pepper.
You might not be of age but that didn’t stop you from drinking and Peter liked to take his off nights to enjoy himself some so he was drinking too and next thing either of you realized your innocent flirting that usually happened turned into high key sexual tension and with nothing to stop it, well you both took advantage of the situation in a deserted bathroom two floors below the event you should have still been at.
And now you were about to pay the ultimate consequence.
Your nerves grew as you waited for a response. You practically shot out of your skin when your bathroom door opened.
“Please tell me this is some fucked up joke,” Peter said, not even caring that he just walked right into your bathroom without even knocking.
“Pete-Peter I-,” you shook your head. “Why would I joke about something like this?!”
“I don’t know!” He wouldn’t meet your eyes as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Retaliation for me fucking you in a bathroom at an event for your dad?”
“That’s all that was to you?” You asked quietly. Things just kept getting better and better. You sat down on the edge of your tub, you wrapped your arms around yourself. You were not going to cry right now.
“I-“ he tried to start but you stopped him.
“It wasn’t conventional or perfect but hell Peter it meat more to me than just a quick fuck.” Before you could even register the tears you were holding back slid down your cheeks. You shifted, your head going to your knees and your hands covering your head. It was getting hard to breathe and his silence was not a reassuring thing.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, sitting down on the floor in front of you. He pet your head.
“What are we going to do?” You sobbed.
“Hey,” he said, tugging you forward so gently, bringing you into his lap. He secured his arms around you. “We’ll figure it out, I promise. We don’t need to have all the answers right now. Okay? Let’s just take this a step at a time.”
“How are you not freaking out,” you asked, pulling back some to look at him.
He finally looked you in the eyes. “I’m terrified,” he admitted. “But I know we can get through this.”
You gave a hesitant nod.
He kissed your forehead and didn’t leave you the rest of the night.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/
The two of you tiptoed around the topic for 3 weeks before you were finding yourselves cornered by your dad.
“What’s going on with you two? You’ve been acting weird for a couple weeks now.” Tony stated. He’d called a team meeting but as soon as you arrived, Peter was already there, you discovered that no one else on the team was arriving.
Peter looked at you, you both knew he was a terrible liar when under pressure like this.
But you? You were a great liar. You learned from the best after all. You arched a brow at your dad. “What do you mean? How have we been acting weird?”
Your dad hummed. “Let’s see, the two of you get all jumpy when the other shows up. I keep catching the two of you whispering to each other whenever I’ve left you alone for a few minutes. There was the fact that at that banquet I had a few weeks ago the two of you disappeared for a while. Y/N you’re not eating normally, Peter everytime I ask you something you either jump out of a daze or I can’t get your attention at all. I can go on guys, so tell me. What’s going on?”
You leaned back in your chair. “Peter asked me out, we didn’t want to tell you, things are a little weird right now.”
Tony looked at you in surprise.
You prayed that as Peter did the same your dad wouldn’t notice or wouldn’t realize that the look he was giving you wasn’t the “oh my God you had to go along that route to avoid the worse one? You shoulda just told the truth and not lied!” Look.
“Oh,” Tony said, nonchalantly he added, “Here I thought you were pregnant.”
Your eyes went wide, fuck.
“What do you take me for, kid?” He asked. “Did you think the cleaning staff was going to not gossip about having found a pregnancy test in your bathroom trash?! That I wouldn’t find out about it?”
You took a shaky breath.
“I know when you’re lying, you can’t lie to the person that taught you to lie, Y/N. It doesn’t work.”
You had to try, “Well then why is Peter here if that’s what this is about?” Maybe you could get him off the hook.
Your dad’s face went blank. “Now you’re just insulting my intelligence. Of course it’s Peter’s! Kid’s been in love with you since before you two even met!”
Peter’s face went red as he twisted the computer chair he was in away from both of you.
You blushed lightly. “Dad stop!”
Tony sighed, finally he sat down in a chair across from you. “What was your plan?”
You glanced at Peter then down at the table. “I… we-we don’t have-have one.”
Tony reached across the table and took your hand in his. “Okay, that’s fine for now, sunshine. Whatever you decide, I'll support you. There’s options if you don’t want to keep the baby or if you do. I suggest though that you two figure out what this means for the two of you before you make any of those decisions first.”
Tears welled in your eyes.
Peter was looking off to the side but he had returned his chair to facing your dad. “Thanks Mr. Stark,” He added quietly.
Tony smiled at him. “If you hurt my daughter, Parker I will kill you and no one will find the body. Understand?”
Swallowing the sudden lump in his throat he nodded in response.
Tony stood, he leaned across the table and kissed your head. “Sorry I forced this out, but you two were driving me crazy. I’m here when you want to talk more baby girl.”
You nodded and wiped at your face.
Your dad left, leaving you with Peter and impending conversation about the child growing inside you and what your futures held.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/
“So,” Peter started after the two of you sat there for 10 minutes in silence after your dad left. “I… I think now would be a good time to have this conversation, Y/N. So, I’m gonna just lay everything I’m feeling about this out.”
You glanced at him, he’d scooched closer to you and faced you.
He took a breath and started. “Your dad wasn’t wrong. I… do love you. I just… this is all messed up, but you know, it’s me why would anything go the way it should go, right?”
You went to speak but he continued.
“I’m not ready to be a dad. But I’m willing to take the responsibility because of my actions if you want to keep this child and want to raise them together. Or if you want to do it on your own. Or if you want to give them up for adoption. Or just want me to-“
You turned your own chair to be facing him and wrapped your arms around his neck.
He relaxed some and hugged you back as best he could with the angle.
“Would it be alright if… if maybe we just start with a date first?” You hesitantly asked.
He let out a sigh of relief. “Yeah, yeah please.”
“I don’t want to get rid of them. But with that being said, we have plenty of time to decide on what we want. And I just really want us to give being together a try before we make any life changing decisions.”
Peter nodded then kissed your cheek.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/
Of course your date went perfectly. As did the one after that, and the one after that and the, you get the point.
Peter went with you to your first doctor’s appointment and made sure he’d be there for all of them after that.
After that first ultrasound, well to say your minds were set on a decision was an understatement. You couldn’t believe you were so hesitant to want them.
Everything after that was a blur. You and Peter got closer, as did your expecting date.
Your dad and Pepper supported both of you the entire way. As well as Aunt May and the entire Avengers team.
You couldn’t have asked for more.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/
“Shh,” You whispered to the little girl. She giggled and held a tiny finger to her lips. The two of you poked your head through the cracked door.
A tuft of wavy brown hair stuck up everywhere from the pillow.
“Go ahead baby,” You whispered.
The little girl pushed the door open and ran for the bed. She jumped up, right on top of the man laying there. “Happy birthday, daddy!” Shouted as she sat on his back and shook his shoulders. “Wake up! Wake up! Mommy and I made you breakfast.”
You got into your side of the bed, set the plate down on your nightstand as Peter pretended to still be asleep.
He let out a loud fake snore.
“Daddy, wake up!”
You chuckled. “I think daddy might need some raspberries with his pancakes, Rory.”
Her eyes lit up. She smashed her face right into her daddy’s neck, making him flinch and laugh.
“Oh my I see how it is my girls wanna play games with me huh,” he scooped his little one up in his arms and raspberries her cheek before she could get away.
Rory squealed and struggled against him.
You laughed at the scene before you. But this caused both to stop, share a mischievous look before they’re both pouncing on you and giving you the raspberries now.
Which led to a full out tickle war, cold pancakes, and warm morning cuddles.
Tags: Wanna be tagged just ask!
@manchurian-barnes, @marrvelle-fics, @chloe-geoghegan1 , @buckysendoftheline ,
@peterparkerscamera , @esistmon , @httpmcrvel , @karlitabi-rrito rrito, @ximaginx
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ts-unsolved · 5 years ago
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Final Wrap-up for Chapter One
((since chapter one will be coming to a close shortly and there is still an assortment of questions left over, here is a masterpost of responses to queries that couldn’t be addressed during the story! 
[reminder: the ask box will be left open, however the characters are not available. please keep in mind that non-plot related questions will not be answered by the characters after this post.]
Anonymous said: ((Just wanted to tell you your drawings are so pretty and I love ur blog. That is all I have no braincells to ask questions))
Anonymous said: OKAY MOD I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW I LOVE THIS AU SO MUCH AND ITS SO COOL AND GOOD AND YOUR ART IS TOO!! sorry for caps I’m just excited
Thank you! Sorry I didn’t always get around to answering asks like this, but for every one that was sent in, I appreciated it with all my heart. You guys are angels 💖
Anonymous said: What is one haunted location you guys would really like to visit someday?
Poveglia is definitely the highest on the list for the notoriety alone, although they would likely never get the permission to go (the history in general is almost excessively horrible and tragic, so nothing good would come out of doing an episode there. Maybe it’d be good as a final-chapter type location? 🤔).
@anxious-fander-bean​ said: Hey Logan, have you ever tried swing dancing? It's really fun and good excersize! There's also a lot of bouncing and upbeat music, so Patton might enjoy it as well! ((I'm doing it. I need the qpp boys to be happy and have fun, bc they deserve it.))
(LOGAN: I’ll...consider it.)
You did it, you got them to go on some good ol’ platonic dates! B)
Anonymous said: I feel bad that I don't have any deep question or something along those lines, but what's your favorite thing to bake, Pat? - 💐
That’s alright! Questions don’t have to be deep to be fun/interesting. 
(PATTON: Cupcakes! You can make so many different flavors, and there are tons of fun ways to decorate them!)
@why-should-i-tell-youu2 said: Why cant anyone else see the seal?
You need to have The Sight to be able to see demon sigils. Patton has this ability naturally, and Dee has it because Elliott taught it to him. Otherwise, Virgil and Roman would be the closest in terms of gaining this ability, but a scared/skeptical part of them is holding them back. 
Anonymous said: My good dorks, is there a way to, I don’t know, get a better/more effective charm for your office? One that costs more than $10? -🍁
Anonymous said: Hey, Logan, potential naturalistic explanation for ya: depending on what the charm was made of, shifts in ambient room temperature could have caused minuscule expansions and contractions in the material that would eventually crack the charm. Do I believe my own explanation? Absolutely not. Am I grasping at straws for a non-supernatural explanation? Absolutely. And ambient room temperature doesn’t even begin to explain the red symbol around the charm
(LOGAN: Our budgeting is already a mess as it is, the last thing we need is to waste more funds on decorations. And that theory seems much more reasonable than the contrary explanation.)
Anonymous said: Is the demon that Pavreen summoned the same demon that possessed Elliott?
Anonymous said: Welp Virge SUMMONED A DEMON- (Why do I have a feeling Remy was the demon that possessed Elliot-)
Nope, they’re all different demons! The demon that Parveen summoned is notoriously difficult to contact, so a bunch of teenagers wouldn’t have been able to do it. Likewise for Remy; you can only summon him once you have his True Name, and he’s already destroyed most references to that (sorry Patton).
Anonymous said: omg omg omg what part of mythology is remy part of???
He’s not from any particular mythology, but he is partly based off of Alps from German folklore and the general mythology around sleep paralysis!
Anonymous said: Can Patton see supernatural beings like ghosts and demons and stuff? I just think it would be interesting if his scars make him able to see them :3c
Anonymous said: If both Dee and Patton can see the sigil, and Dee can see ghosts, does that mean Pat can see ghosts too? With the whole red glowing thing (forgot what its called) it seems to be connected.
Yes he can see ghosts/demons, and you’re right that the scars (or rather the deal with the demon which gave him his powers and scars) are what lead to him being able to do it. The red is just a general indicator of something supernatural/not of our Realm.
Anonymous said: Wait so if Patton and his family all have that mark could that mean Patton is not completely human 👀 -🌈
I supposed you could say that Patton’s not entirely human because he’s a witch who was born without a soul, but he’d find that pretty offensive tbh.
Anonymous said: Are Elliott and Patton maybe related, even distantly? Also, roman needs to suck it up and have Feelings for the Snake Man
There’s no relation between Elliott and Patton. Elliott is the child of a seer and a psychic, Patton is the son of witches. They’re similar, but different. (Also you’re assuming that Roman hasn’t liked the Snake Man since high school, but considered him off-limits because he’s his brother’s best friend).
Anonymous said: Does Patton know that Dee can see spirits and does Dee know that Patton is protecting them all?
Anonymous said: Dee, pat, do you know that each other can see the sigil? 
Anonymous said: is ... is patton a witch and dee a dee-mon and that's why they don't like each other.....?
Anonymous said: Pat what do you think about making deals with demons?
They’re both aware of each other’s secrets! Technically they’re both doing their best to protect everyone, but that doesn’t mean they agree with each other’s methods or bond over the shared responsibility. 
Patton is indeed a witch, and Dee is a regular human who happened to summon a demon one time. Patton thinks Dee is the occult equivalent of a satanist, which he disagrees with because dark magic is unnatural/dangerous in his eyes (making deals with demons only leads to trouble!), and would prefer Dee not endanger his friends. Dee doesn’t like Patton because of his perceived moral superiority, and finds the way he can be so secretive and two-faced creepy 
Regardless, they’re both sitting in glass houses and have more in common than they think.
Anonymous said: Patton Should Hug Dee *
Maybe. But he won’t. 8′D
Anonymous said: Since Dee has been able to see ghosts for a long time, was he an open believer in ghosts before Elliot died? Since it was mentioned that the reason he lies about his belief is because he knows that they're dangerous, he wouldn't have had a reason to hide it in the past. And if he did are any of the others aware of the belief change? Well, besides Remus. I'm guessing that one is pretty obvious.
He may have been more involved as a believer in the past, though that doesn’t mean he was ever super open about it. He was aware of how it would look like to outsiders (being genuinely skeptical at one point himself), so he wasn’t going to paint a target on his back by talking about ghosts and demons and things most people can’t see.
Of course, that didn’t stop people from stereotyping and making those sorts of assumptions about their friend group anyway, but no one besides them really knew about their secret-- not even Virgil.
Anonymous asked: What would happen if one time, the gang ended up getting something supernatural on camera?
The result of that would depend on the being. Ghosts can kinda appear on camera, although it’s very rare for them to appear as a full bodied apparition, which is why they usually only manifest in spirit orbs or light/shadows. Poltergeists are better since they’re able to interact with objects, but likewise since they can’t manifest into a physical form they can easily be brushed off. Demons and other miscellaneous creatures will straight up not appear if captured directly on film; you’ll simply get video glitches and distortions.  
So essentially, they may technically have found something already, but capturing evidence that’s also compelling is a lot more difficult than you’d think. I imagine there’s a good chance that anything legitimate wouldn’t get taken too seriously because of how easy it is to fake evidence nowadays.
Anonymous said: Okay so a little bit of a rant but not really ig but imagine the ladylike and unsolved crossover for this AU like I can see it as like Thomas' friends dressing up Roman and Dee in style and seeing a blushing mess and maybe flirting going on because of how good the clothing complements each other but this is kinda a weak idea lol
It’s not a weak idea at it, it’s really cute! (though I may just have a soft spot for the Ladylike cast and crossovers). 
The only thing to note is that I’ve chosen not to include Thomas’ friends in this AU because I personally weird about writing fiction about real people? (I was on the fence about including character!Thomas for a while too, tbh). So, apologies to anyone who’s sent similar asks or wanted to see any of Thomas’ friends; they wont be around!
Anonymous said: Did Dee and Remus ever have that talk Dee said he would try to have a while back????
They might have gotten the opportunity to chat back when Remus came back to help shoot the Room 1046 video. It wouldn’t have been a complete reconciliation by any means (dealing with years of baggage in one sitting is Hard), but now Remus is aware that Dee is open to discuss things again at some point in the future, so progress!
Anonymous said: wait wHAT?! When did he (Emile Picani) die?? Give us the deets oh wise one
Anonymous said: emile is... dead? what happened?
I see y’all, but unfortunately you’re not getting any answers from me just yet! You’ll have to wait until the next chapter~.
Anonymous said: Shit is about to go down and I am worried about the next ghost "adventure"
:) Don’t Worry About It.))
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tysonrunningfox · 5 years ago
Text
Two Night Stand AU: Part 8
Sometimes, you finish things on a quest for feeling accomplished and end up not feeling accomplished but also things are done.  And it’s bittersweet, but like, in the baking chocolate way where sure they’re sugar there as a concept but god, at what cost? 
Ao3
“Knock knock,” Ruffnut cracks Astrid’s bedroom door and peeks inside, and thankfully Astrid notices the plate of pancakes in her hand before calling her out on her less than stellar knocking etiquette. 
“Those better be for me, I’m not in the mood to watch you eat pancakes.” 
“A peace offering,” she nods, handing the plate to Astrid.  There’s a smiley face of strawberries on the top pancake and it makes her think of oatmeal from a world ago, and her stomach feels like it’s twisting around a rock. 
“What did I do to deserve a peace offering?” 
“Did you tell her yet?”  Snotlout appears in the doorway, thankfully clothed, and Ruffnut glares at him. 
“Tell me what?” 
“The pancakes were to keep your mouth full while I very gently tried to tell you that well…” She exhales, and Astrid wonders when Ruffnut grew up and started trying to be gentle. 
Or maybe she didn’t.  Maybe Astrid is just fragile now, and it’s a relief when the thought makes her furious, some forgotten lick of heat and anger swirling in her chest. 
“What is it?”  She takes a bite of the pancakes, forcing it down even though it feels dry in her mouth. 
“Should I be here for this, or…” Snotlout points over his shoulder, “or I can go—”
“Just tell me,” Astrid snaps, the newly re-discovered edge in her voice making Ruffnut raise her eyebrows. 
“We really liked having the place to ourselves,” she says, “Snotlout is ready to take over the lease, and since I’m the primary name on the apartment—”
“Yeah,” Astrid doesn’t need to hear the dissertation about why she needs to move on from this stagnant phase, because it’s finally on repeat in her head again, the silent assertion that tomorrow needs to be different.  That she needs to make tomorrow different.  “You’re right, I’ll…start figuring it out.” 
“I told you she could take it,” Snotlout tells Ruffnut, “it’s Astrid, after all.” 
“Yeah, and she hasn’t been acting like Astrid—”
“She’s right here,” Astrid clears her throat, “and I get it, I’ve…kept your second bedroom occupied long enough.” 
“You can stay as long as you need to,” Snotlout nods, “like a day.  Two days.  Through the week, maybe—”
“I’ll…figure it out.”  She says, shocked when she actually believes it.  Or at least she believes she can believe it.  That she might be believable once again.  
The second bite of pancakes tastes better. 
“Ok, then,” Snotlout claps, “we can share boxes, if you want, I’ve got like, a fuckton of boxes at my place—”  He cuts off with a grunt when Ruff smacks him in the stomach.  “Hey, I’m being helpful—”
“What happened to you?” Ruffnut asks, risking her fingers to steal a strawberry off of Astrid’s plate. 
She thinks about telling the whole truth, but doesn’t want to cry about it.  She doesn’t want to hear about what an asshole Hiccup is.  She doesn’t want to think about him, and she’s starting to remember how to force her thoughts in a direction. 
“Apparently it took a near hostage situation for me to get off my ass.” 
“Or some good dick,” Ruffnut jokes, but she looks relieved, and Astrid wonders how long she’s had that worried frown for Astrid to be so used to it. 
“Wasn’t all that,” she lies, still not thinking about him.  Not remembering what he said as she was leaving, after he proved to be everything she hates.  Not thinking about how it hurt to hurt him, even though that’s stupid.  Beyond stupid. 
“Well,” Ruffnut pats her leg, “either way, we have to get ready for the party tonight.” 
“Shouldn’t I be finishing my application or looking for an apartment with a totally possible monthly rent of zero dollars?”  She laughs, a little overwhelmed, but after months thinking she’d never even be whelmed again, it’s not unwelcome. 
“All the responsible returns at once,” Ruffnut snorts, “it’s our last New Years as roommates, come on.  One last party.  Snotlout’s dumb pretty friends are invited, you can continue your successful streak…”
“Oh God, no thank you.”  She sets the half-eaten pancakes aside, “I’m good, on that front.  Dating profile deleted, lesson learned, focus regained.” 
“So it was horrible dick, then,” Snotlout muses, “you know, I always kind of thought something would happen with the three of us while you two were living together.  And now that the days—or even hours, you could say, are numbered—”
“Still my room,” Astrid points at the door, “both of you, out.” 
“All the bossiness back at once,” Ruffnut smacks Snotlout on the back of the head as she stands up, “and you, stop being gross.” 
“You love me,” he follows her, grabbing her butt, and her giggle makes Astrid’s chest twinge. 
And she doesn’t think of Hiccup.  She doesn’t think how for a night it felt like something.  How for a day it felt like friends.  How he looked at her like he saw her, like she was more than her recent mistakes. 
Because even if that were true, it doesn’t change what he did.  When someone tells you who they are, it’s best to believe them, and Hiccup showed his hand. 
And his foot.  And she wishes he’d never made it her business, but there’s no changing that now.  There’s just forward. 
00000
“Really, I think you’d enjoy it.”  The guy who can’t read social cues drones on even as Astrid tries to make herself as obviously uninterested as possible, nursing her third drink of the night and trying not to resent everyone else for having fun.  “I don’t understand the stigma so many adults have against animation, but really it’s a show about the bond between man and dragon, and the world building on an already beloved franchise is vast.  You could say chief-sized.” 
He laughs at his own joke.  The joke that she doesn’t get, or care to get. 
“And with the coincidence of your name and appearance,” he gestures at her and she doesn’t remember Hiccup saying she was pretty over a video call, “I think you could really get into it.  Plus, the romance angle.”  He chuckles and she gets the impression he’s going to reach for her, or something, and she wonders who invited him.  She was promised Snotlout’s dumb, pretty friends, not some guy obsessed with a kids’ show about dragons that he’s been harping on about for twenty minutes.  “A great slow burn between well, the beautiful Viking warrior and the late-blooming future chief.” 
He gestures at himself. 
Her mother always told her that if she doesn’t have anything nice to say, she shouldn’t say anything at all.  Her uncle always told her that was bullshit, and sometimes people need a reality check. 
The only problem is she doesn’t know what reality he’s living in, so she doesn’t know from which direction to apply that check. 
She blinks slowly and chugs the rest of her drink to avoid that decision. 
“You know, it’s polite to respond when someone is trying to have a conversation with you.” 
“Dude,” she stands up, “I’m just intimidated as hell, you know.” 
“Oh, no, Astrid,” he says her name like it matters more than the rest of her and she doesn’t think about Hiccup pleading it at her, saying if he’d known she existed, his life would be different, and it’s a cruel twist that some nerd sees fate in her materialization tangential to his fantasy.  It’s like she hasn’t existed while she’s been unseen, and it makes her want to scream. 
“You’ve got me built up into this whole…thing, and I’m really not.”  She says some sanitized version of what she’d scream at Hiccup if she saw him.  She leaves out the ‘yet’ that she thought he had the capacity to understand, even if only for a second. 
“No, but you are,” he tells her, and she hates that it’s not a line, that he’s staring through her and telling her who he wants her to be.    
Mostly, she hates it because she was hoping for that a week ago. 
She hates it because it’s easy to identify the pivot point where she stopped waiting for someone else to instruct her and started asking for more.  Better.  She hates how she’d have to precede her rant at Hiccup with ‘thank you’. 
Good thing that won’t happen. 
“Fucking hell,” she swears to herself as she flops on one side of the couch, wishing she’d thought to grab another drink. 
“Astrid, right?”  Someone approaches her, a tinge of concern in their drunk voice, and she looks him up and down. 
Handsome, nothing behind the eyes.  No wit or charm or jokes about Bundy paraphernalia that should have made her run. 
“Are you Snotlout’s dumb, pretty friend?”  She asks.  He smirks, but the concern grows too as he points at the open front door where two uniformed police officers are waiting. 
“I mean, I don’t really know him that well, but sure.  I can be.”  He grins, teeth straight and uniform.  And there’s charm there, sure, but it’s generic.  A mass-produced kind of ubiquity to it that’s comforting, like she could get it anywhere and be reasonably confident in the outcome.  “But are you Astrid?” 
“I can be,” she jokes, wondering what the nerd would have said to the same line.  She doesn’t wonder what Hiccup would have said because it probably would have been something obnoxious, like he could pull off ‘I know’. 
“No, I mean—are you the Astrid Hofferson secondary on the lease?  They’re looking for Astrid Hofferson.”  He points at the cops again. 
“Well, considering I’m coming off the lease this week, I think any noise complaints should go to Ruffnut Thorston, who is over there.” 
Maybe it’s the universe righting itself.
“No, they’re asking particularly for you.  Something about breaking and entering?”  Stupid-Handsome scratches the back of his neck and she freezes, smile turned waxy on her face. 
Of course not.  That would require too much luck.  Be too easy. 
00000
“Did you write this note, or not?”  The officer at the station asks for what feels like the hundredth time, and Astrid knows, finally and absolutely, that Thank You notes are stupid and that her mom is and has always been wrong. 
What are you even supposed to do when you get a Thank You note anyway?  Does it require yet another Thank You?  Is it just the start to a never-ending procession of false politeness that people had time for before the internet? 
A gift is a gift, an in-person thank you is enough, writing it down is just a legal liability. 
“I don’t know where you got that.” 
“That doesn’t answer my question, Miss Hofferson.” 
She should ask for a lawyer. 
She can’t afford a lawyer. 
Hiccup should have to pay for her lawyer for framing her. 
“Yes, I wrote the note,” she blurts, “but I did not leave it anywhere than I had broken and entered into—”
“It was found in a Mr. Johann’s apartment, inside of a broken window.” 
“Yeah, I obviously just left an eyeliner note behind after smashing a window.” 
“Is that a confession?” 
“It’s sarcasm,” she sputters, “I didn’t—who told you about this?  Was it a guy?  On the phone he sounds like he’s plugging his nose like a nerd who never learned to hold his breath in the pool?”  She doesn’t think of Hiccup’s voice.  Her heart doesn’t twinge like it’s been stepped on. 
“Let me escort you to the holding cell while I confirm our source.”  The hesitation is obvious, and she feels rooted to the shitty, cold, plastic chair. 
“What happens if I don’t ‘let’ you?”  She asks, half-wishing she’d taken the dragon nerd up on the offer to play Viking warrior in a back room, except even joking about that internally makes her feel claustrophobic, like there’s no room in her for any more complication. 
Like Hiccup is weaseling his way back in where he doesn’t belong and crowding her. 
“Follow me, Miss.” 
00000
The next hour stretches.  In fact, she’s not entirely sure that it’s an hour, maybe all seconds just feel like hours when she’s in a concrete holding cell next to a woman who has puked into a government provided bucket 4 times. 
This is going to look great on her medical school application. 
Why do you want to be a doctor?
Well, my time in jail really showed me that the public’s opinion on alcohol is irresponsible.  Alcohol poisoning shouldn’t be a social activity.  Except it should, because it sounds like something I want to engage in right now, given that I had to mention jail on a medical school application.  Also, I want to help people, or something, especially after all this time I’ve spent being helped.  Not that karma operates on an economic model of supply and demand, but also, from what I know about capitalism and upward mobility, I’m not taking any chances. 
“Astrid Hofferson?”  The officer appears again, asking her name like he didn’t just spend an irrationally long time confirming it.  “You made bail.” 
“That’s impossible.  I haven’t even made my phone call yet.” 
“Well, there’s someone downstairs offering to pay your bail.” 
“Who is it?”  She narrows her eyes, trying to remember where Ruffnut was when she left the party. 
“Some guy,” the officer shrugs. 
“That narrows it down,” she snorts. 
“Most people don’t turn down bail.” 
“I’m not most people,” she crosses her arms, getting comfortable on the bench next to Pukey McPukerson.  “Who is it?” 
“Some guy,” the officer repeats, “tall, skinny, saying something about convincing his neighbor not to press charges.” 
“No.”  She puts her foot down.  Or she would, if it weren’t already down.  It’s so down the ball of her foot is starting to go asleep from the hard floor and she lets the tingle anchor her. 
“No?” 
“I don’t want his bail.  Just give me my phone call.” 
“You’re turning down bail?”  The officer asks and she nods, “I…honestly don’t know what to do with that.” 
“I’ll take it,” Pukey offers and Astrid glares at her. 
“You just stick to your bucket.”  She grumbles, “you only get one liver, you know.” 
“Oh, you’re a doctor now?”  Pukey rolls her eyes and Astrid crosses her arms. 
“Not yet.”  The yet feels like fire under that numb foot and she nods to herself, more resolute in her protest. 
“So, you want me to go tell this guy that you don’t want his bail?”  The cop asks and she raises an eyebrow. 
“I’ll tell him.” 
“I’m not supposed to let you out of holding without bail.” 
“I thought you didn’t know what to do with me,” Astrid antagonizes.  She’s not even sure why.  She’s glad she’s white.  Not in a ‘it’s great to be white’, disgusting way, but a ‘this little emotional peak would have had devastating consequences if she weren’t white’ way. 
She’s entirely shocked when the officer lets her out, apparently taking her suggestion to let her tell Hiccup where he can shove his bail, and that’s how she ends up at the top of the stairs, looking down at him. 
He has balloons. 
He looks miserable.  Desperate.  All of the things that her pettiest side has always wanted someone to feel when she left, instead of the other way around. 
“What if I told you that I helped?  Would you lock me up with her?”  He asks, and the officer behind the desk coughs. 
“Are you confessing, or?” 
“Yeah, no, I have no interest in this particular bail.”  She points back towards the holding cell, “I’d like my phone call, please.” 
“Astrid,” Hiccup calls up at her, like he’s said her name a thousand times, and her fingernails dig into her forearm with the force it takes to keep her arms crossed.  “I—I didn’t know what else to do, you deleted your account—”
“Not this, you idiot.”  She flings the insult like it weighs more than it does, and he goes along with the charade, crumpling slightly in a way she wishes she didn’t notice. 
“I know.  I know, I just—I broke up with Heather—”
“I don’t care.”  She almost wishes that she would yell, to impress upon him how much she means it, but it comes out calculating.  No, more than calculating, like she knows the answers already, and she feels like a liar.   
“Please.”  He begs.  She should like it.  It makes her feel worse and she wishes it were easier to resent him. 
“Phone call.  Please.” 
She gets Ruffnut’s voice mail.  Pukey lives up to her nickname and pukes twice more.  She thinks about her applications. 
Why do you want to be a doctor?
‘Because no matter what has happened in my life, the idea of helping people has been a North Star.  Yes, I know I have a fucking criminal record for breaking and entering, but in my defense, I really had to pee.  Also, the guy who half-framed me used me to cheat on his girlfriend so…
So, it doesn’t matter that he’s smart and funny and that it felt like he saw me.  It doesn’t matter that he admitted he was wrong.  It doesn’t matter that no one has ever looked at me like they were desperate before. 
It doesn’t matter that I liked it, even vindictively.  Even cruelly.  Even in a last-minute attempt to feel like I wasn’t part of the problem.’ 
So, yeah.  She’ll get into medical school. 
As a patient. 
Because how else is she going to get the therapy she so clearly needs without health insurance? 
“Astrid Hofferson,” the officer returns, “you made bail. Again.” 
“Lucky bitch,” Pukey moans into her bucket. 
“Is it—”
“It’s someone else,” the officer sighs, “do you need to vet them too?” 
“I wouldn’t mind.”  She stands up, shocked all over again when the officer escorts her to the top of the stairs. 
Ruffnut is downstairs counting money and the relief is almost perfectly drowned out when she sees Hiccup still standing there, stupid balloon waving in the heater blasting over his head. 
“Is this bail acceptable to you?”  The officer asks and she nods, resolving to ignore Hiccup even as she can’t look away from the fact that even the top of his head is miserable. 
Good. 
He deserves it. 
She’s not sad that he was so stupid.  He doesn’t feel like something lost.  It’s…post-orgasmic hormones that make her want him to be better.  It’s just the result of a long, satisfying experiment that makes her want to accept an apology. 
“Parked the car,” Snotlout appears in the doorway, “paid for fifteen minutes, so can we hurry this up?” 
“Snotlout?”  Hiccup bolts upright, recognition in his voice startling him out of his situationally appropriate moping. 
“Hiccup?”  Snotlout freezes, “what’s—why do you have balloons?” 
“Why…don’t you?”  Hiccup snorts, miserable and funnier for it, “everyone knows that New Year’s Eve is balloon hour at the police station.” 
The TV behind the intake desk shows the ball dropping and Snotlout and Ruffnut move habitually, pecking each other on the lips, and Astrid thinks she’d rather be in the holding cell.  Maybe her bail can be donated to charity.  She could be the face of The ‘don’t online date instead of finishing things’ Foundation.  The ‘just because Grandma is on Facebook doesn’t mean there aren’t still people on the internet who can and will ruin your life’ Initiative. 
The ‘sometimes when you make your bed you do actually have to lie in it’ Charitable Organization, under the sub-heading of ‘Don’t have sex with people who might interact with your arrest record’. 
“Can we go home?”  Astrid breaks the tension, leaning into Ruffnut’s side.  “The meter’s running.” 
“But it’s Hiccup,” Snotlout whispers at Ruffnut, “you know my weirdo cousin—”
“Thanks for that,” Hiccup blushes and Astrid wants to ask why and to hit him and mostly, to never want to see him again, because it’s impossible to stop looking at him. 
“What have you been up to?”  Snotlout punches him in the shoulder and Hiccup looks desperately at Astrid again, undistracted by the distraction.  “Wait—no, you know Astrid?” 
“He got me arrested.” 
“I didn’t know her last name,” Hiccup defends himself, “Astrid—I—there’s no way in any brand of hell that I could stop thinking about you and—”
“You fucked Astrid?”  Snotlout claps his hands against his cheeks, “this is—Oh my God, I don’t think I’ve seen you since high school graduation and now you’re the guy my girlfriend’s roommate hooks up with—”
“Snot!”  Astrid snaps, “let’s go.” 
“Astrid.”  Hiccup stumbles between her and the door, stupid balloon slapping against a corner.  “You have to listen to me.” 
“Hmm, ok, I’ll listen to you when you’re a witness against me, in court, because you got me arrested—”
“That was one time!”  He yells, too loud for a police station, “sorry, I—too soon, I get it.  I get it.  I—we had two nights together.” 
“Because of a blizzard.” 
“Whatever, I don’t—”  He reaches for her but thinks better of it and his hands shake between them with the desire to make his point.  “We had two nights together and yes, I should have told you about Heather.  I thought about it, but I couldn’t—I didn’t want to waste a second—it might not work out.” 
“And he sees sense,” her heart falls anyway, with all that saturated green staring at her, all that intensity that she can’t make unfamiliar in her mind.  “Let’s go, guys.” 
“No, no.  Please.”  He’s smart enough to only tap Ruffnut on the shoulder, “it might not work out, because two nights is…an insufficient trial period.” 
“I’m not a Netflix subscription!”  She snaps, and he has a way of making her certain that she wants to cling to, no matter how stupid that is. 
“No.  You’re—if we spend more time together, you might realize that I’m…insufferable during game shows.  And I might learn that you’re…really into weird cartoons that I hate.” 
“You did not just say that!” 
He read her mind again, and it’s not allowed. 
“Can we move this along?”  An officer indicates and Snotlout ushers them towards the door. 
“Fuck. Shit.  Fuck.”  Hiccup sputters, “not at you, not at anyone, I just—you can’t storm out again.  You can’t.  Not without hearing what I have to say—”
“You got me arrested.”  Astrid growls, “I spent the last few hours in a cell with someone throwing up, I—this is going on my record, how am I getting into medical school now?” 
“You’re applying?”  He grins, too wide, too bright, and she’d hit him if she could trust herself not to enjoy the authenticity in his reaction.  “That’s—I didn’t know what to do—”
“Not get me thrown in jail?”  She proposes. 
“Can we potentially leave jail out of the argument for why you never want to see me again?”  He winces even as he’s talking and she recognizes the face she’s felt herself make too many times, unwilling to stop even though she’s behind.  “For now, at least.  I truly believe this will be funny later, this is something we’ll laugh about—”
“Jail.”  She re-iterates.  “Like with bars. And cops.  And a single phone call.  Actual jail.” 
“I think it’s one of those jokes that needs time.”  He’s defeated.  She hates it.  She hates herself for hating it. 
“Ok,” she takes her phone from the evidence box on the nearby counter and hands it to him.  “Give me your number.  I will call you the second this is funny.” 
Which is never. 
“Ok,” he nods, and she refuses to look at his quick thumbs programming his number into her phone.  She refuses to see whether he’s Hiccup or Princess Outpost, because it doesn’t matter.  She’s not going to text it. 
“Ok.”  She takes the phone back. 
He hands her the stupid balloons. 
“So…bye,” she makes herself say it, waving him towards the door. 
“You’ll…” He swallows the rest of whatever he was about to say and she shrugs. 
He leaves. 
It’s different being left when the other party doesn’t want to go.  Less lonely.  More permanent, if only for her choice being implicated. 
“Sorry about that,” Astrid says reflexively to the officer who’d dealt with her in the cell and he holds a hand up. 
“That guy was nuts.” 
“Can I get his number though?”  Snotlout asks, scuffing his shoe against the linoleum.  Astrid blinks at him.  “What?” 
“You’re so stupid,” Ruffnut fills in the gap, hugging Astrid a little tighter, and Astrid’s going to miss her.  She’s going to miss this entire miserable, unending, painful period of her life, isn’t she? 
Closing doors always hurts, even when they need to be closed.  Even more when they don’t. 
“He’s my long-lost cousin, and I learn that he’s Astrid’s hostage dick?  I’m curious—”
“Snotlout.” Ruff cautions, careful again. 
And that’s not what Astrid wants.  She doesn’t want people to be careful, she wants honest.  She wants…
She blinks back a frustrated approximation of a tear and looks up at the stupid balloon Hiccup gave her.  One side reads ‘I’m sorry’.  The other reads ‘I’m an asshole’. 
She laughs. 
Not a cynical laugh, but a real bubble of something from underneath the layers.  Her intuition taking the reins. 
“Fuck,” she sits down in yet another shitty plastic chair, pulling up her contacts and finding Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III (an awful name).  His address is there.  So is his social security number.  She’d steal his identity and start over if his name weren’t a bodily function.  “You guys can go.” 
“Are you sure?”  Ruffnut asks, but there’s relief there too. 
“Yeah, I’ll get you back for the bail, ok?” 
“And you’ll get me Hiccup’s number—”
“Snotlout, go.”  She orders him like she has the authority and it seems to work.  And then she calls Hiccup.  It gets through half a ring before he’s picking up, breathless and pathetic and like he needs her.  She doesn’t know if she’s ever been needed, but she likes it.  “You are an asshole, for the record.” 
“Recorded.” 
“And an idiot.” 
“Yeah.” 
“And next time you decide to attempt romance, at least practice your speech first because that was awful.” 
“Basically, I was forced to endure it while like, astrally projecting above myself to judge myself.”  He laughs, sound husky in the speakers, and she thinks he’s outside, in the cold.  “It was awful.” 
“In the spirit of constructive criticism, it was appalling.  Truly.” 
“I’m sorry I put you in jail.”  He answers, authentic, and when she looks at the police station door, he’s outside, watching her hold his stupid vulgar balloon while the officers probably judge her sanity. 
She hangs up and steps outside, not surprised when he kisses her even as she doesn’t expect the tenderness in his hand against the back of her neck, the soft desperation in his lips. 
“Too soon,” she pushes him back, fingers staying fisted in his lapels, largely outside of her control. “You got me arrested.” 
“But have you considered how much tougher you seem now?”  He jokes, gloved fingers twined in hers as he tugs her down the sidewalk. 
“Absolutely,” she snorts, “already thinking about how to incorporate this into my application.” 
“Well, don’t worry about Mr. Johann’s interpretation,” he squeezes her hand and she squeezes back, sure of herself for some reason she can’t be sure of. 
“Oh yeah, did you kill him?” 
“Totally.” 
“Without me?”  She teases, and it’s a new year, the snowbanks on either side of the street barely soot-stained. 
“Too many witnesses out here,” he scans the empty street, “your place?” 
“To be fair, I don’t really have a place, I have a bed for a couple more days of Ruffnut’s charity.” 
“Oh, I only ask because I don’t have a place either,” he says it like he means it and she believes him because she wants to.  Because it feels instinctive in a way she feared she’d forgotten. 
“You’re a catch.” 
“Yeah,” he snorts, and she squeezes his hand first this time. 
“I think I’m ready for that kiss now.” 
“What if I don’t like your prison breath?”  He tucks her hair behind her ear, fingers strong and hesitant under her jaw. 
“Probably shouldn’t have sent me to prison.” 
“Fair enough.” 
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sailorsilverladybug · 4 years ago
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Now that it's all over, I wanted to let you in on the past couple of weeks of my life. It's been rather stressful and hectic, and some of it rather frightening, so please bear with me. I doubt this is a surprise to any of you, but we are living in the middle of a pandemic.
Unfortunately, it is not under control. Not even close. And while I won't go into politics in this venue, I will say that I am both angry with how this has been handled in my country, and afraid of what the future will bring.
So, here goes. Last week my sister-in-law convinced me to go with her into one of the nearby cities to shop and go to a local casino (which practices social distancing and refuses entry to anyone not wearing a mask). We had been out before, and I needed things for the house, so I went. And I had a blast. We had a lot of fun and just got to hang out and spend time doing girl things.
But this past Friday, the 14th, around mid-morning, I started feeling ill. I had a headache that was nothing like my migraines or a stress headache. It centered just behind my eyes. I started to have a runny nose and felt strangely out of touch with my surroundings. Worse, I started having trouble breathing. I told my husband, who called his work and warned them he might be infected. Then we started calling the local hospital to find out about testing.
We registered to get tested. The woman who registered us said there would be a sign on the side of the primary care physician's office that we should call when we got there Monday. Because we live in a tiny rural town, the hospital only does testing between 9:00 and 12:30, Monday through Friday.
We had to wait until Monday to get tested. An entire weekend, wondering if I was going to get sicker and sicker. With my pre-existing conditions I was sure if I had Covid-19, it would be a death sentence.
Added on top of that, my husband totally lost it when I tried to talk to him about my wishes if something happened to me. He absolutely refused to listen and for a moment I thought he was going to throw himself on the ground and throw a real fit like our son did once when he was small. So, I started putting everything in order, just in case. I spent most of Friday, Saturday, and Sunday putting together my own memorial service, just in case. I made written notes to doctors and made sure our life insurance was all set.
All of this took an even bigger toll on me than the continued headache and the congestion. Then, probably because of stress, I started feeling sick to my stomach. It wasn't pleasant. The stress got so overwhelming, and nothing wanted to go right, and I was just ready to tear my hair out and run down the street screaming. That would have been a rather embarrassing arrest, so I'm glad I had some self-control.
While we were waiting for the testing to start, I worked for several hours to put together a back-tracing list that had everywhere I had been for the last three weeks, where my husband had been, and even the places I knew my sister-in-law had gone. Then, on Monday morning, at just before eight, Steve and I left to go and get tested. Since we were afraid of exposing anyone else, we walked (and I walked up a very big hill almost completely without help!)
By this point, I firmly believed I didn't have Covid-19, but I wasn't about to take chances with anyone else's health and safety. So we got to the hospital, saw the sign on the side of the primary care physician's building, and made the call that we were there... except, we hadn't found the right sign. The one we were reading was the one ON the side of the building. Not AT the side of the building. So, after my husband discovered our mistake (forty minutes on hold later), we called the second number and waited for a response.
Now, I'll be honest here... by this time, I was hot, tired, afraid, and just plain mad. I held it together, but I'm pretty sure my diatribe on anyone refusing to wear masks was heard ten miles away. By the end of my rant, both the others waiting in their cars to be tested had rolled up their windows (it went on for a REALLY long time).
Then a nice gentleman came out. I turned to my husband in a panic and made him promise he wouldn't let me bite the poor guy (which is a tendency I have when I am in extreme pain and a doctor gets too close). He walked us through what would happen and I asked if he would let my husband hold my head, partly to avoid biting him, and partly because Steve just makes me feel better. The man agreed, Steve leaned my head against his chest, and I sat on my walker and waited with my eyes closed for the torture to begin.
I'll be honest, while it totally sucked, it wasn't quite as bad as I had made it in my head. It felt like he was trying to tickle my brain, and I think I begged him to stop and said "oh S***" A LOT, but in spite of the discomfort, I survived it. Watching Steve go through it a minute later was almost worse, because I knew how much it sucked. He had his hands fisted and was shaking the whole time. He was stoic about it, but afterwards, when I made the quip about tickling the brain, he said "more like drilling," and just shook his head.
The gentleman we had been speaking to (I call him a gentleman because he was incredibly kind and gentle) said we might have our results as early as today, which was both a surprise and a blessing, because without Steve going back to work, we weren't sure how we would even manage to get food next week, let alone pay our rent, electric, and other bills, or set money aside for winter heating.
We were on our way back when my sister-in-law (Steve's brother's wife) drove past. She yelled at us to stay where we were, and we did, because we were friggin' exhausted by this point. She picked us up and drove us home after taking her own test about ten minutes later.
So, we waited. Now, I'll be honest. By this point I was about 98% sure that none of us had Covid-19, but we didn't take chances. Steve works in a grocery store. Sometimes he is stocking shelves, sometimes running a register, and sometimes he is out at the fuel island (the store gas station) pumping gas for people, and taking their money. So we knew if he went to work he could expose a LOT of people. We were very careful.
At 9:00 on the dot this morning I received the phone call telling me that I was Covid-19 negative! I bounced in my seat through the whole call. She didn't have Steve's results yet, so we waited. Around eleven, my sister in-law got her results. And then around one Steve got his. None of us are infected, thankfully. Steve called his work and let them know he is free to return (not a moment too soon) and will be going back tomorrow.
In the meantime, all the things we couldn't do because we had to self-isolate need to be taken care of, including several errands like getting dog food. So he has been rushing around getting things done all afternoon. Then I sat down and started writing, because that is just how I process things. I put on some music and just let my fingers fly over the keyboard.
My week sort of sucked, but the bright side is, I don't have Covid-19. Now that you know that, it's time I got into a subject that has really been bothering me. If you don't want to read further, you don't have to, but I really wish you would, and that you would spread the message along.
Every single person who chooses to wear a mask in spite of the annoyance it causes, is a hero to me. Every one of you who has gone without going to the club, who hasn't been going to church, who hasn't done any of the other things that happen in big groups. All of you who have been frustrated, but who know that your actions can either protect or harm other people... You are all heroes. You make a difference. Just as much as necessary workers. Just as much as doctors and nurses. You are heroes.
For those of you who don't wear masks, social distance, or use proper protection procedures, I am begging you, don't let this disease take away what you hold dear. Be safe, be smart. Listen to the doctors and nurses. Listen to the people begging you to wear a mask. Don't put yourself (or your loved ones) through what I just experienced.
Each time you get out of your car to go in a store, put a fresh mask on. Each time you touch something that has been touched by other people, use hand sanitizer. Stay at LEAST six feet apart. Wash your hands constantly, and thoroughly, for at least 20 seconds. Avoid touching your face (or the outside of your used masks!) and be very careful.
You don't want to go through the worry and the fear that you might have been exposed. But more than that, you don't want to be worried that you gave Covid-19 to someone you love. Please, be careful, be kind, and be safe. I don't want to lose you from this world. Every single one of us is special and has a purpose. Don't let your light go out. Take care of yourselves, and the rest of us.
Now, I'm going to climb off my soap-box and go do something completely unrelated to death and dying for a few hours. I might play a video game, or write a funny story. I might blast some music and sing off-key (loudly). Who knows. All I know is, I've had enough of fear and death to last a lifetime.
I wish you all well. God bless you.
Tori
Sailor Silver Ladybug
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caden · 5 years ago
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Honestly thank you for saying that. I also don't hate Travis but can't stand the way he goes about proving his "wokeness" he's obviously good natured but his approach is just so off and it's awkward when listening to the other brothers try to swerve around it, being more self aware than he is. I can't listen to the new Adventure Zone arc because her went out of his way to create a disable character and then be like "are you gonna ask me about my wheelchair" it's just too fucking much dude.
This is a super long rant-y response that doesn’t really say much of consequence, but...
yeah i have not enjoyed his arc so far sadly. I’m still going ahead with it for the time being, it’s worth listening to but honestly TAZ hasn’t gripped me all that much since balance. I feel like one of their issues is that balance really really tactically built up to its big emotional dramatic moments, everything felt really natural and just flowed so well-- whereas with these other arcs, I feel like they just jump the gun and try to constantly have dramatic stuff happening without ***earning*** it. The nature of most roleplaying games is just that they’re long form, and IMO the most important element of nailing a podcast like TAZ is making sure that the downtime is really enjoyable-- that means having really charismatic side characters, engaging and open-ended worldbuilding that allows for lots of different situations, and PCs that have clear and interesting motivations. Travis just isn’t a good enough DM to pull that all off. He’s decent at roleplaying IMO, but his personality / skills are just better suited to being a player. He clearly isn’t as good a storyteller as griffin, and even griffin’s storytelling has been strained from time to time. 
I honestly really really really wish that they would play a more Critical Role / MCDM style DnD game, where the worldbuilding took front-stage over the characters, and where it was assumed that the main players would cycle through MULTIPLE characters because their characters could actually die if it was dramatic-- or even just if the players fucked up in combat. I’d love to feel like they were in a setting that allowed them to have guest players on, where the world has internal consistency (unlike the live shows which are always fun but clearly not sustainable for a long-form story), and where the whole thing isn’t all built along railroading players down an ultra long-form epic story in the vein of Balance. Like one thing that’s great about DnD for me is that if you don’t currently feel like you’re gelling with the character you’re playing, you can just make a new character! If the quest you’re on isn’t incredibly engaging, you can tell the DM that you want to explore something in your character’s past or independently pursue some other motivation instead. I really wish they would experiment with a more freeform, noncommittal story, where they could lean into their improvisation skills (which is what they’re very good at) over their storytelling skills (where they're sort of lacking). 
I also feel like-- and this is just an unintended byproduct of the general vibe that they’re going for-- one big problem that I notice with their storytelling is that all of their characters are just like... too good. I feel like they’re so committed to being wholesome and non-stressful that everything about their worlds just has no edge at all. I’m not saying that I want TAZ to be game of thrones, obviously that would suck-- but so much of the conflict in their worlds feels awkward or forced because they don’t create their characters to be as flawed as I think they should. Justin usually being the exception. I think this is reaaaalllllly coming to the forefront in the new arc, Travis just isn’t capable of putting the kind of tension into his stories that Griffin was because he’s too committed to making his world crunchy and chill and, dare I say, woke. But I think the wheelchair thing is coming from a different sort of bad storytelling-- writers put a diverse character into their story and then feel so immediately proud of themselves that they forget to actually make the character interesting or memorable beyond that, inadvertently tokenizing the characters. 
Griffin also did something really smart when he was DMing, which was that he intentionally never told us anyone’s race. He explicitly said that it being an audio medium allowed the listener the freedom to imagine whatever race they want, as well as imagine trans-ness, disability, etc. Which, even though it might sound kind of like a cop-out, is IMO the best way to handle it. If they play characters outside of their race, people will be mad. If they don’t have enough diversity, people will be mad. If they have explicit diversity but portray something insensitively, people will be mad. I personally think that griffin would have been smart enough to do these things sensitively, but he’s always erred on the side of caution. The only exception in balance was them explicitly stating that Lup was a trans woman, which was also handled very well IMO. Travis just isn’t taking that level of subtlety to his DMing because he isn’t as perceptive about these things as Griffin is. He’s stating all this stuff explicitly because he wants people to know that his world is diverse. Which is cool, but it comes with the baggage of actually having to execute that diversity with some level of insight. In this case, I honestly think the players should be more comfortable going ahead and making characters that are explicitly NOT cis white (or white-coded) men. They made the move after balance to start playing women, which was good. The alternative is just constantly having protagonists that, even in fantasy/sci-fi settings, are cis-coded, white-coded, or male-coded. 
All in all, the big issue for me rn with the Mcelroys is that i have much more of a sense now that they’re the types of creators who are entirely just trying to please their fanbase. This is really visible in the style of comedy that they’re doing these days as well. They aren’t trying new things, they’re just finding what’s comfortable, what fans clap for in live shows, and doing more of that. I remember once in a live show they said “okay guys, we’re making a change. we’re no longer gonna allow you guys to ask questions that are just you bragging about a cool thing you did”. That was one of the best decisions they made from a content perspective, lol. Their most interesting work of the last three years has been the Trolls 2 podcast, because it’s stylistically VERY different from their normal stuff, and because NOBODY was asking for it. And as a result, it was able to be a novel, funny concept. I feel like in the age of streamers, youtubers, creators who are basing their brand off of PERSONALITY over CONTENT, we’re gonna be getting more and more of this kind of art. As creators, the Mcelroys aren’t trying to do something new, to create exciting thought-provoking funny content. They’re just repeating the things that have found them the most success. They take the desires of the fans a bit too seriously, which keeps them from going in new directions, because fans can’t validate things that don’t exist yet. The fans shouldn’t be the ones who create new trends or decide the tone of the content. That should be entirely in the hands of the creators. You can sorta tell that at times Griffin and Justin are unhappy about it. I think this was at its worst about a year or so ago, and they’ve realized it and started to work on course-correction. They stopped doing TAZ live shows with the balance characters, which was a good choice. I DON’T think that the issue is that they ran out of ideas, it’s just that they’re overdue for a creative renaissance. I would love it if instead of just doing more TAZ and mbmbam, they continued to do a bunch of small unusual projects in the vein of Trolls 2, the old Monster Factory videos, the new non-DnD TAZ live shows, etc. I’m also enjoying The Besties (I listened to it before it got canned and was excited when it came back), because I feel like Griffin and Justin act more like normal humans on that show and less like Mcelroy brothers. 
WITH ALL THAT SAID, their content is still often very fun, and I think it’s really good that they exist as successful creators. They’re a net positive force in the world, the small attempts people have made to cancel them for dumb shit will always be petty and stupid.��They’ve more than earned a spot in the podcasting hall of fame, I don’t think they’re just has-beens, and I will continue to listen to plenty of their stuff for the conceivable future even if it’s not always exactly what I want from them. 
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diamondinthenotsorough · 4 years ago
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‘Why Are You So Angry?’ A Mini Rant By Me
“Greta Thunberg? I don’t like her. She seems so angry.”
I’m sitting at the dinner table, eating rice (as always). I kind of shrug. “I guess so.” Me, being an idiot preteen, doesn’t question this. My parents are always right.
Fast forward a bit and Greta gets nominated for person of the year by TIME. The conversation happens again, but with one difference: I’m no longer a dumb preteen. 
I’m still kind of dumb, but I like to think I might be able to make my own decisions. And this gets me wondering. It’s question I’ve seen asked before: ‘Why are millenials/Gen Z so angry?’
After all, they had it worse, right? It could be better. You don’t want to end up like so-and-so so get a good education. Smile when smiled at. Keep marching little soldier.
Okay, I say. I’ll keep going. My mental health is steadily declining but let’s keep moving. Success is my only option or I’ll be eviscerated. You know what? It’s going to be great. 2020 is going... not good but fine. I have hope.
Bam. Pandemic.
Well shit, I think. What now?
But you know what? It’ll be fine. I can get used to this. Generally as a person I’m pretty go-with-the-flow, y’know? Nothing really bothers me that much. 
But then. But then. Some asshole (Derek Chauvin) kneels on George Floyd’s neck and suffocates him to death. The internet explodes in a fit of outrage. I watch the video and sit there in stunned horror.
Well. 
I’m starting to see it. Like, yeah. I can understand why people are so angry. This is the 21st century. We should be better than this.
And obviously, as a young teenager I bring it up to, who else, my parents.
Their responses are less than stellar.
“Floyd... yeah it was bad but he was a criminal.”
“He wasn’t the best person, Diamond.”
“You shouldn’t kill people but... ”
There’s one inconsistency, of course. My name isn’t actually Diamond. But this just bothered me and for very good reason. They tried to excuse a murder. 
And the more I think about it, about our situation and about everything going on, the more I get maybe not angry but frustrated. Because, hey guys, that’s a murder. Someone died. Floyd forged a 20 dollar bill and was on drugs? Sure. Doesn’t excuse the fact that some guy knelt on his neck until he literally suffocated. Breonna Taylor takes a nap and gets killed, but Donald Trump is accused of sexual assault more times than I can count and he gets to be president? What the heck, guys.
It’s getting real. I’m in high school and everything is starting to get very, very real. People are dying and suffering and for what? Is that my future? Yeah, yeah, it could be worse. It definitely could be worse. But you don’t alleviate pain by comparing it to someone else’s. I’m LGBTQ and I hear stories of people getting killed, burnt to death, assaulted. I try to confide and I’m being a snowflake. I’m probably lying. I sound stupid. Climate change is happening and is pretty much inevitable at this point. I try to ask my parents about it and they deny it. Tell me that we’ll just have to fix it. It’s fine. It won’t happen. For you, maybe. For me? That’s my future. There are people going hungry and people getting paid way below minimum wage and people being forced out of their homes - in the middle of a freaking worldwide pandemic - and what do you say? It’s their fault. Don’t grow up to be like that.
You’re not helping, I want to scream. Dude. There is something seriously wrong so why don’t you care? One is an outlier, two is a coincidence, three is a pattern and we are well past three at this point. We’ll inherit this world that you leave behind and we’ll have to salvage what’s left. Greta Thunberg is angry for a pretty good reason. What are we going to do?
And you know what else makes me frustrated? The whole xenophobia thing. It’s not that hard, guys. Just don’t be a jerk and we’ll get along fine. Unfortunately, some people can’t help themselves. Acceptance is the most basic thing. Everyone should get it. It’s not like acceptance is a gold toilet seat or something. It’s basic human kindness. People are still fighting for this when they should have gotten it long, long ago.
So yeah. I’m kind of tired of this. I’m tired of feeling so beaten down and worn out and torn apart and I’m really, really tired of people not caring. We’re seven billion some on this good good planet Earth and at the end, we’ve got to take care of each other. The only thing that really separates us, other than physical limitations, are our own minds.
Diamond, signing out.
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