#i might delete this so.

[byunbaekhyunie]

'Hello, World' Concept Film — Hello ver. BAEKHYUN

[crowkip]

slides u some timkon wip scribbs

[hoshizoralone]

began playing halo and cortana is probably my new best friend

[cheezestixk]

For old times sake

[discodummy]

Roommate’s out of town so I sat in meeting like this

[marinatedsaltea]

Oh lord he coming

[slimsnipes]

it's hot here..

[boringwomanwithabook]

portrait of the blogger as a strange and awkward woman

[sourlemonadez]

My first tumblr post aa throws this unshaded mess at you and runs

[spoopdeedoop]

is anyone else really fucking normal about the fact that we are essentially mosaics of what we love. about how we pick up mannerisms like pretty rocks on the beach. i have my favourite books in the way i write and i have my favourite cartoons in the way i draw. i have my best friend in the way i speak and i have my parents in what i speak about. is anyone else really fucking normal about that. is anyo

[itsahotminuteinbetween]

tryna figure out where I am on the doodle spectrum

[architectureandmorality]

Practicing Arthur with charcoal.

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

[crystallinestars]

I think Aventurine would be too afraid to ask you out directly, so instead he would get you to play a game with him. Can be poker, a coin flip--anything really. The only rule is that the loser has to do anything the winner wants.

Of course, Aventurine wins, and with a smug grin tells you to accompany him for the rest of the day. He asks the right questions to sneakily deduce where you would want to go if given the opportunity (aquarium, museum, the movies, etc) and takes you there under the guise of being curious what's so special about that place.

He splurges to dress you up in fancy clothes, pays for all your meals, and buys you anything that catches your eye. No expense is too big when it comes to pampering you, but he'll laugh it off as him trying to get on your good side with some bribing.

It is a date in all but name, but he'll never admit it is one.

Aventurine gives everything and asks for nothing in return, only jokingly teasing you about giving him a kiss in exchange. In reality, he doesn't expect anything as he doesn't want to force you.

Yet, if you give him that kiss he secretly yearns for, perhaps you can make him confess that there is more to this encounter than just fulfilling a bet. Perhaps you can catch a glimpse of the feelings he tries his best to hide when you're around, find a crack in that smug facade of his.

[punchymon]

Sloppy doodles n' wips

[tubbytarchia]

oops ponied more lifers (Jimmy and Joel are redesigned lol, design notes and original under cut)

With Tango I wanted to play with half body/split coloring and make him look scorched, including his horn which will just smoke while he's not using magic. I'd like to think he's absolutely fine and all that's changed is that he can only conjure fire magic but he doesn't care that much. His tail and mane can burst into flame whenever

BigB is a big guy with a thousand yard stare and prey animal behavior with his ears constantly tucked back. I really like the idea of him having a huge tail dragging behind him, adds to the unnerve a tiny bit. When people look away he turns into a hyperrealistic creaking horse

Why did I make Jimmy all yellow. His color is blue!!! Blue!!!! Even if I usually highlight him with yellow because it just looks nicer but!! Blue..!! Seeing Lizzie build a blue parrot for him inspired me to finally redesign him, his coloration is based on the blue quaker parrot! The canary theme can still work with this, I'd like to imagine his flight feathers started going yellow and he wasn't just born with canary feathers. Also tried to get across that he's a lanky ass pony but makes himself look smaller

Joel I think works so much better when he's relatively monotone and the green highlights are implemented sparingly (you know, as highlights). I think it makes him look more special even with normal horse colors than if he was mostly green, kinda loses that bit of the design that really identifies Joel AS Joel. Yeah my first Joel design was garbo. Also he's very angry that god made him an earth pony and tiny. sorry little guy

Also also I made this little video where Joel eats Scott and runs away with Jimmy you're welcome