#i might be being dramatic but also it's realistic isn't it

[scorndotexe]

the dnd scheduling horrors have kicked in early

[imbecominggayer]

How To Write Characters With Addiction

From @differentnighttale: "I am curious if you give advice about writing people with addictions for example substance. I have reasons my male MC does it. But how can I describe the addictions the MC has correctly."

In this post we are going to be talking about addiction! From alcoholism, substance abuse, nymphomania, to everything else that can be a possible addiction. This post will be all about making this realistic and complex :)

A) What Are The Benefits?, Make It Convincing

Grab a fucking piece of paper or whatever you have and just write a paragraph from your addict's perspective on the situation. Omit the bad stuff. Make it highly convincing. if you aren't thinking "hmm, understandable" after you've written and read it, you did it wrong.

What do they get out of it?

Why did they like it at first?

Are they calmer, more intensely concentrated, does it take the edge off?

Are they more confident?

Does it ease the sense of being fundamentally wrong or dull some other pain?

Is it fun to do something rebellious?

What made them like this thing so much they tried it again, and again, and again?

B) Think About The Consequences, And Ignore It

Oftentime, at least in my experience, people will continue with a bad habit if it means they don't have to be the one to think about the consequences.

The Consequences For Addiction Include:

Financial. Depending on what your character uses to get their fix and how much they use, they might be spending hundreds a week if they are a particularly aggressive user. People often steal money from their loved ones. Addiction also tends to get people fired. Write a scene where your drunk character gets fired for operating machinery. Have them be a burdenous sponge.

Social. It's common for addicts to lose their loved ones since it often gets to a point where it's impossible to care about these people despite how much you love them. Make love ones leave your character! And don't blame them

Physical. STDs, Overdose, Liver Failure, and a shit ton of other issues from the chronic to the fatal either cause, exacerbate, or are linked with addiction. Recovery can't automatically save your character so don't write that story.

Psychological. Being an addict isn't fun since you get to struggle with points 1, 2, and 3 all at the same time! Write about your character issues. Their lack of control. Their spiralling life.

Write all about your character's suffering. And then have them justify it. Make it convincing.

They need it. It's not their fault that this is the only that helps them! Everyone just doesn't get it. I'm trying to work on it, OK?! It'll all work out! They know that it's wrong but...

My most hated shit is when a character's arc is easy. They struggle with some things like a big dramatic argument with their wife, they cry a bit, and then they learn that "drugs are bad" so everything is fine :D

NO!!! Why don't you write about a friendship that doesn't get mended? A chronic illness they now have to pay huge medicine bills for? A fucked-up rap sheet that they can't escape?

And it's not because we want to punich addicts. It's because it doesn't matter if you care about addicts if you don't care about the messy shit!

It's easy to sympathize with an addict if you make them the most innocent victim who never hurts someone intentionally and who gets rid of the addiction in a second and never struggles with it ever again!

Do the hard shit. Make your readers sympathize with the unsympathetic asshole addict! Addicts aren't always good people! They can be dickbags. And they still deserve resources. Life isn't some kind of karma game where dickbags suffer and good people rise! Everyone deserves to not suffer!

Addiction is ultimately a disease. But it's a disease that can make someone you love into an absolutely unlikeable person. And this is coming from someone with an alcoholic dad <3 He does good things and bad things. I can sympathise with my dad and not let him walk all over me.

C) Withdrawal Is Leaving An Ex, Relapse Is Returning

Addiction is a motherfucker trying to leave. It's basically the equivalent of a clingy ex who keeps contacting you, asking for just one conversation, and the moment you so much as acknowledge them you are fucked.

And suffering the brunt of a clingy ex who won't take the hint tends to cause the same symptoms as withdrawal!

Obviously, withdrawal symptoms depend on what type of ex you have and what age you are and yada yada yada. Research for specificity :)

Withdrawal symptoms can include:

Headaches

Insomnia

Fatigue

Hallucinations

Seizures

Tremors

Cravings

etc.

BE AWARE: Relapses are when someone returns back to their drug if they were going cold turkey or going back to their original dose. Relapses can sometimes result in an overdose due to the fact that the brain has been weened off the substance and is now overwhelmed by the high dose.

Relapses often happen when a person makes the deliberate choice in order to stop these fucking nightmarish symptoms. To use the analogy of a clingy ex, you start talking to them in order to tell them to stop contacting.

Relapses can also happen through being in a setting where the behaviors associated with the addiction such as sex, gambling, drinking, substance use, and all manner of things are normalized.

This setting could be a party, a bar, or even a friend group.

Relapse is made more likely if someone is self-detoxing away from a support group or a doctor.

Writing about withdrawal and relapses are an important part in making a story feel more authentic. Just like with mental illness, people rarely learn the lesson and follow it perfectly. They make mistakes. Slip back into old habits. Do shitty things.

We aren't writing their suffering to punish them. We are doing it because you can't say you care if all you are willing to do is look at the easy parts.

D) Little Tidbits To Keep Track Off

This is the miscellanious things that didn't fit into their own boxes.

Friends!

Do they have friends who also have their addiction? How do they hang out? What are they like? How are their substance using friends different from their non-addict ones?

Slang!

Don't just look up slang for your substance of choice. You'll need to look at some first-hand accounts of addiction. Find an influence who has struggled with substance abuse in the past and see how they talk about it!

Variables!

Remember to keep their geographical location, socioeconomic status, time, and a host of other factors. If your character is a penniless alcoholic then it's unlikely they'll get their hands on some type of expensive gin. They'll probably use rubbing alcohol. Keep the price of your drug in mind.

A character's status will also impact their slang. No one unironically says doobie anymore.

A character's location will also impact how they get their shit and how other characters will react to that addiction.

A character's financial status also impacts how the consequences of their actions impact them. A low-income character wont be able to afford the same medication as a rich addict. They also won't have the same luxury for quality therapy, rehab, programs, time, anything really.

Look At The Addict And The Loved Ones

Try not the skew the reality of addiction to paint the addict as the victim and the loved ones as evil for not being forgiving and tolerant enough.

Keep sympathy for both the addict and the loved ones. Or drop sympathy for both of those characters.

E) RESOURCES

FDA and DEA online databases and drug resources

Social Networking Groups

Medical Journals

Local medical professionals, police, and medical examiners

The US national poison center

[rico189sspamtonhell]

Obsessive Danny Phantom villain imagine

Imagine a DP villain crashing a banquet or fancy ball because Danny was there and their eyes land on you, who also happens to be their nemesis. During the confrontation, a slow song begins to play. Wanting to toy with you they grab your hand and forcefully pull you onto the dance floor so you can slow dance with them. One hand is on your lower back, the other grasping yours as they lead you in the dance with their piercing eyes staring into yours as they tell you their grand plan for the night. As you waltz the lights shine down on you both, giving you and them an ethereal glow. For a moment, just a moment they fall silent as they look down at you. In that moment their eyes are soft as they see you in a new light.

And then Danny puts an end to it as he flies in and sucker punches them away from you Characters I think I would do this

Vlad. His dramatic ass would totally love making you dance with him as he monologues

Spectra. I can see her using this as a manipulation tactic to try and get in your head while also being a way to show off her beauty to the crowd

Freakshow. This man lives to put on a show. While dancing isn't a part of his usual act he doesn't mind giving it a shot to toy with you and garner attention

My self-indulgent ass wants to say Walker, Skulker, and Technus but realistically they would not djdjkdkjd. Skulker would think it a waste of time but might delight in hunting you down while you're wearing your formal attire just to see you struggle and also because you look beautiful. Walker might mention that you're looking all dolled up before attacking you. Technus would probably be more enamored with all the tech at the DJ booth than how you look ckjdcjdjd

[i-love-tall-women-with-big-hats]

The Yanderes of the Autumn Court

(Fall has finally 'fallen' haha, and I couldn't resist writing this. I'd say this is based on fairies, but I love cosmic horror too much to not add a wee bit of it...so I named them Alterkinder or Alterkind for singular (lit just German for 'Older Children' smh 😞) because this is my bastardized version of them.

To avoid the overuse of this made up word, I also call them the Fallen, the Autumn Court, autumn fae, or the Wither. If I say 'Yandere' specifically, I'm referring to the Yandere. Though it might seem like it, not all fair folk are lovesick in this world of mine, so the yanderes are one of a kind even compared to their fellow eldritch abominations.

Enjoy this cosmic fairy shit, loves.)

Content: original worldbuilding, stalking as courtship, unintentional cannibalism, kidnapping, necrophilia, eldritch monsters and their own version of love. Took inspirations from Hades and Persephone, but besides the kidnapping scene, nothing else.

༺═─────────────────═༻

The Autumn Court.

Once the greatest of the Alterkinder, they bear scars from wars of ages past.

Nowadays, they are merely remembered as the Fallen, the Shadows of What Was. They were left to rot in the realm of ambers and russets, where the earth is too coarse and barren to grow much of anything.

As a result, the Fallen pride themselves on being resilient, persistent even at the face of hardship and humiliation.

Which is why for you, their mortal pet, it means rejection will never be an option.

Harvest Season

As patron deities of harvests and hunts, the Fallen treat courtship the same way a hunter would a promising prey. It's all a game to some of them. Whereas we mortals have dating rituals, the Autumn Court have what they call 'the Harvesting'.

Elder Fallen will know the season is coming before it even hits them. They will feel it in the breeze flowing through their hair, feel it in the slightest drop in temperature, or in the smallest change to their physiology.

The younger, inexperienced Fallen tend to fall victim to their basest instincts.

Should you find yourself the target of a Fallen's affection, and a Yandere one at that, just know that you will have until winter to dissuade them. Before the first snowfall, they can court you without interference from any other spirits besides those from their own court, so take advantage of it.

I wouldn't get your hopes up though. You'll realize the further more you read this what I mean by 'persistent'.

Finders, Keepers

It is a tradition in the Autumn Court that a fae must brand their chosen prey to prevent any conflict.

At this point, they will not show themselves to their chosen mortal just yet. Reasons vary, but for a Yandere, it's typically because their first priority is to let all the others know that you are theirs and theirs alone. They know just how heated territorial disputes within their court can get, and they'd rather keep you out of it as much as possible.

Though this tradition was founded to prevent any two autumn fae from fighting over the same prey, it isn't always respected. If the Yandere themselves haven't disregarded the brand of their fellow kin, then they are ensuring that nobody else would do the same. Realistically, that is impossible, but some of the more powerful members of the court could absolutely decimate anyone they think covets their pet.

From death by a thousand thorns to being mauled to shreds by their most vicious familiars, but I'll speak of their cruelties later.

How a Fallen chooses to brand their Darling is up to individual preferences.

Among the Headless Riders, their favourite method is to douse their target with their blood. Their human can scrub themselves clean, but little do they know, enough of it will still linger for any fae to notice.

Some are less dramatic and opt for something simpler, like runes and insignias.

I don't know about you, but the lack of blood make it a little less romantic...but that's just my opinion.

Pumpkin Spice and Apple Pies

After they have secured their ownership, this is when the true courtship begins.

Some Elder Fallen may still remember the magic of the Old Summers. They cannot stop the inevitable march of winter, but the chill won't drop any lower than is comfortable for a while just so they could see you wearing your favourite sweaters. Anythig to prevent you from wearing too many layers.

Some could even bless your lands with fertility to ensure a plentiful harvest for the local farmers in your area, or make it drizzle everyday should they see how much you like how it sounds against your windows.

But what can a young Fallen do when he doesn't have much power or prestige to his name?

A feast.

It isn't official, but any Fallen worth their salt must show they are capable providers. The Autumn Court as a whole not only finds pride in being survivors, but in thriving where their enemies thought they will perish.

Roast meat, your favourite desserts, and fruits you cannot name will all be beautifully arranged on your table regardless of how small it is.

But never ask what the meat is from. Don't ask what these fruits are either. The apples' flesh is red, bleeding, for a reason. You wouldn't want to know why.

The feast is simply a symbol of their dedication to you. The Yandere hopes that by showing you the fruits of their labour, you will believe them when they promise that you will never feel fear or hunger ever again.

Just let them take care of you.

The Reaping

At last, fall is coming to an end, and the Fallen are beginning to feel the approach of winter. The time has come for them to choose whether or not they want to keep you.

The Reaping is the last stage, and it is perhaps the most scariest thing the Yandere can do to you during the Harvesting.

This is because for many mortals, they wouldn't even see their suitor until this stage in the Harvesting. It's not like they could have known that the owl, falcon, cat, mountain lion, and fox that they have been encountering was just their secret admirer in disguise.

And as the wise of old said: "The longer the wait, the sweeter the fruit."

Knowing this, the Yandere would certainly abstain from talking to you just to keep the Reaping special.

It would be the first time they'll hear your voice directly being spoken to them, and only them.

It would be the first they'll feel the warmth of your skin and supple flesh, take in your scent and taste.

At last, they have you all entirely to themselves.

It all seems romantic...for the Alterkind. But for you, the first meeting is nothing less than a kidnapping.

Imagine the earth shaking out of nowhere. When you thought it was only an earthquake, the ground quite literally parts in half, and a great hole forms before you. Just as you try to even make sense of it, a great black steed leaps out. Its rider--of course it has a rider. It won't be able to wear the most noblest of accruements otherwise--simply whisks you away, back to which he came from. Your screams of terror will be ignored.

Every Fallen has their own unique love story, but if there is one thing common in all of them, it is that none of the brides were willing.

Zealous Protectors

Their defeat at the hands of the Summer Court and Spring Court had heightened something that every Alterkind has: possessiveness.

For one thing, having their home realm taken from them has made them deeply paranoid. Being stripped of all their wealth and power was like rubbing salt on their wounds.

As such, the Alterkind of the Autumn Court learned to be wary of anyone who so much as look at their possessions wrong.

The average Fallen are zealous in their guardian duties. Elder Fallen especially are known for taking their vows of protection seriously. After all, the memory of what they've lost is still fresh in their mind.

So optimistically, your devoted Alterkind was born several generations after that fateful war, but don't expect much improvement.

One of the most cruelest deaths whispered within the Court came from someone even they least expected.

There was once a prince of a quiet nature. Though far from a pacifist, his temper was not as tempestuous as the winter blizzard or thunderstorms of spring. He planted thorn berries within the belly of a spring fae, nurtured it until they grew out of her bleeding mouth and tore her stomach open.

All of this because she regarded his beloved mortal for longer than what he allowed.

Possessiveness runs deep in the veins of the Alterkinder, be they of autumn, winter, spring, or summer.

But you must know, the culture of the Fallen was built from humiliation, the detritus of their golden age act as its foundation. It nurtured them to become what they are now:

Jealous.

Possessive.

Vindictive.

Like Leaves in Fall

Ironically, the court that finds virtue in change and transition have some of the most...'inflexible' members.

You might think concepts often associated with autumn like decay and inevitability would make them more accepting of death, but alas. Once in a blue moon, you will hear tragic tales exemplifying just how much lower the Fallen Kinder could fall.

The Lovesick of the Autumn Court are just that; patron spirits of rot and inevitable death, unable to accept that even something immaterial and abstract like love can be taken from them.

They themselves can decay. It isn't unheard of for an autumn kind to slowly devolve into the very thing they are masters of. Their skin dries and peels like dried bark as their joints and bones go brittle.

They can grow lonesome.

It may hold onto the rotting corpse, too broken to acknowledge the maggots infesting its sludgy flesh, and imagine movements. In desperate hope, their decayed heart will jump as they think, "They're alive! They're waking up! I don't have to be cold and alone anymore!"

But once the Kind realize they were wrong, the grieving process starts anew, and they hurt all over again.

Their entirety withers. Their thoughts and memories may drift away. Their grasp on reality becomes just as lost as fluttering leaves.

'Reality.'

Where you truly ever theirs to begin with?

.

.

.

The Fallen Fae becomes bitter. Cold.

This cold bitterness grows and grows until it turns into something all-consuming. It will destroying whatever kindle was left in their heart, making it impossible for them to feel the warmth of love or hope ever again.

And so...they hold onto their Darling. A hollow shell of what their love once was.

In the shadows of the past.

Mind scattered in the wind like fallen leaves.

.

.

.

Ivies grow here.

In this cold dungeon of old.

Hush, for you will miss it.

The crying of the Withered.

[sofoulandfairaday]

Actually very curious to hear your thoughts and head canons on Sirius + Walburga + Orion

Under the cut, because it's very long. But I'd love it if you read it all. I hope it succeeds in being eloquent, it's hard to put my thoughts into coherent writing for such a sensitive topic.

I don't think that the majority of this fandom actually understands the subtleties of abuse. Also, too many people weirdly like the idea of abused characters, and emphasize their torments, especially physical ones, as a way of... I don't know, evoking more sympathy for them? This happens all the time with Sirius Black.

@ sofoulandfairaday, was Sirius Black abused in your opinion?

Yes.

But not in the way people think.

I am fascinated with stories that explore generational trauma, the cycles of abuse that get repeated over and over. I think Sirius was abused in the way the Roy kids in Succession are abused, in the way that the people in The Crown are abused. It's not that the people in themselves are abusive it's that the family system is.

This doesn't excuse individual adult responsibility because, at a certain point, it becomes your duty not to pass on your traumas to your children. But traumatized adults raising traumatized children is something much more realistic, to me, than “The Blacks liked torturing their children for fun” (wtf?).

The Blacks were an upper-class family in the 1950s. To put this in perspective, my parents both got physically reprimanded as children (1970s), and my grandparents did too (1950s-1940s). It was just the way things were. It wouldn't have been seen as weird if they had been hit, at the time. Do you know when corporal punishment was abolished in UK schools? 1986. And people say Snape was abusive to his students. Bro, 1986. The world has changed a lot in the last 20/30 years but it's a little unfair, in my opinion, to judge their times entirely through our lenses.

And even in light of this... I don't think the Blacks were that physically violent. Maybe Orion clipped his sons behind the ear when they really misbehaved, or threatened physical punishment, but they most likely never truly hurt their kids. I also don't think they raised their hands like filthy Muggles, so maybe... Stinging Hexes? Going to bed without supper? They definitely did not use the fucking Cruciatus curse on their children. The torture curse. The one that scrambles people's brains if used for too long. Sometimes I think that authors don't put thought behind what they write, or exaggerate for the shock value, which... doesn't really sit right with me, to say the least. I don't really care for character bashing of any character. I don't care for painting Walburga & Orion as Disney villains who hurt their children because... they? like? hurting children?

With this being said, I'm pretty sure they were emotionally abusive, maybe psychologically abusive. Tons of families are like that, even nowadays.

Master always liked his little joke,” said Kreacher, bowing again, and continuing in an undertone, “Master was a nasty ungrateful swine who broke his mother’s heart — ” “My mother didn’t have a heart, Kreacher,” Sirius snapped. “She kept herself alive out of pure spite.” Kreacher bowed again and said, “Whatever Master says,” then muttered furiously, “Master is not fit to wipe slime from his mother’s boots, oh my poor Mistress, what would she say if she saw Kreacher serving him, how she hated him, what a disappointment he was — ”

According to Kreacher, Sirius broke his mother's heart when he left. That might have been a dramatic choice of words (Sirius definitely thinks it is because he replies in kind) but perhaps it wasn't.

The problem with the Blacks' love for their children isn't that it wasn't there, it's that it seems very conditional. I fully believe that for a time, when he was a kid, Sirius was a little prince, a perfect pureblood heir. Given his temperament, he might have been the bad child, always in detention compared to Regulus, who was probably quieter, more shy, more poised. Except. Despite all of this or maybe because of all of this, he was probably the more respected out of the two: more handsome, more charismatic, more outspoken, stronger, quicker. Someone like Bellatrix (and Walburga too, I think) must have respected him much more than his brother, even though they probably said the opposite out loud. Sure, they liked Regulus more, but everyone knew he wasn't the brightest out of the two stars. I think the Blacks respected and praised strength.

Want proof of this? Sirius himself calls Regulus soft and an idiot. How many times do you think he heard that sentence as a child?

For these reasons, it's always been my headcanon that the two brothers grew up resenting each other subtly: Sirius probably envied that his brother was their mama's favourite, the one who was shown more affection, despite being not as bright as him, not as good. But children are petty and have very strong senses of pride. In stressful environments they latch onto the identities they create for themselves: if Sirius painted himself, in the family dynamics, as the strong one, the one who doesn't care, the one who rejects even his parents' rare moments of affection, he will most likely never be the one to go to them to beg for their love, or kisses or whatever. On the other hand, Regulus was probably babied by their parents, but never truly treated like the heir, like the competent, brilliant one. His mother might have been more tender with him and yelled at him less, but children are perceptive.

Also, Grimmauld Place has all the characteristics of the Haunted Hause trope, horror film style (which I cannot get into here lest this becomes a dissertation), but generational trauma likely permeates those walls. Merely being back in the house is enough to trigger Sirius' depression.

Sirius is my pride, but Regulus is my joy sort of dynamic for the Blacks and their parents, me thinks.

They love each other but are also constantly pitted against each other. They fight for their parents' love. They think the other had it easier.

Then, Sirius is sorted into Gryffindor. Now, he's already fighting back against his parents now (he's almost 12, the perfect age), but it's always been a little headcanon of mine that Sirius doesn't know how much this will damage him until it happens. We see, again and again and again, in-universe, how much stress the Sorting put kids through - what if I'm not in this house my parents were sorted into? From the way he appears in Snape's memories on the Hogwarts Express, I think Sirius must have thought it hilarious if he was sorted into Gryffindor, the first Black ever to be one. Truly a most rebellious act. This lasted about... seven seconds?

The next day, Walburga sends a Howler and she's the most displeased Sirius has ever heard her, this is not a joke, Sirius, how dare you? You are such a disappointment etc.

Disappointment. The family disappointment.

This becomes Sirius' new persona. The more he leans into it, the more his mother doubles down. Headcanon n°2: they have the same personality, Walburga and Sirius; Regulus takes after Orion.

Golden-child/scapegoat dynamic ensues, worse than ever. This is the abuse I was referring to: no matter how brilliant, how high his grades, how good Sirius is, it'll never be enough. He's the foil to Regulus - less good in school, less brilliant, less popular, less... So. He fraternizes with Mudbloods and werewolves and dissenters of our Lord and Saviour Voldemort, which is a disgrace. He comes back from his first year saying Muggleborn instead of Mudblood, puts up semi-naked Muggle girl posters in his room with a permanent sticking charm - every time Walburga is in there her stomach flips in disgust. He buys himself a Muggle motorbike.

He can never bring himself to tell his parents that he wants their love and approval and they think he wants everything but. Not just that, they think he's actively trying to drive them to an early grave with all of that rebelling.

This, by the way, puts an enormous amount of stress on Regulus. Now he has to step up, wants to step up, to prove himself as finally better, but also he doesn't want to lose his older brother, but also he can never live up to the comparison, but also why do his parents love him now that Sirius is gone, why couldn't they love him better, sooner? This breeds resentment. Desperate to prove himself, he joins the Death Eaters (whose ideas he fully embraced anyway, let's not forget that Reggie was a racist little arse).

Why did Sirius run away?

This fandom makes the MISTAKE of thinking that Sirius ran away because his parents were evil and mean. No. Nu-uh. That's not what happened.

“But… why did you…?” “Leave?” Sirius smiled bitterly and ran his fingers through his long, unkempt hair. “Because I hated the whole lot of them: my parents, with their pure-blood mania, convinced that to be a Black made you practically royal… my idiot brother, soft enough to believe them… that’s him.” Sirius jabbed a finger at the very bottom of the tree, at the name Regulus Black. A date of death (some fifteen years previously) followed the date of birth. “He was younger than me,” said Sirius, “and a much better son, as I was constantly reminded.”

Sirius hated his parents and his brother, but he doesn't offer any indication that they were physically violent towards him - sure, they sound like dicks and they definitely created a situation of emotional abuse (why can't you be more like your brother?), which is still very scarring for a child/teenager, but no indication that they ever brutalized him.

I'm not saying this to argue that emotional or psychological abuse (lying, gaslighting, justifying treating your children horribly with oh, but I'm doing it for your own good, etc.) is less damaging than physical abuse. But I think that half the fandom just writes in a few rounds of Cruciatus to get out of writing the hard stuff - the complexities, subtleties, two-way pain of dysfunctional households.

When Sirius ran away from home, Orion and Walburga blasted him off the family tree. That means that he couldn't come back even if he tried to. He had no family any longer. Running away from home is something that a teenager in Sirius' situation and with his personality might conceivably do - and I'm sure it did hurt his family. But his betrayal was followed by their own betrayal.

Also, I want to contrast this with BELLATRIX and the way she speaks of Andromeda (because we all know that she's actually referring to Andromeda in that first quote):

“Cissy, your own sister? You wouldn’t — ” (HBP) “She is no niece of ours, my Lord,” she cried over the outpouring of mirth. “We — Narcissa and I — have never set eyes on our sister since she married the Mudblood. This brat has nothing to do with either of us, nor any beast she marries.” (DH)

and Walburga:

“- comes back from Azkaban ordering Kreacher around, oh, my poor mistress, what would she say if she saw the house now, scum living in it, her treasures thrown out, she swore he was no son of hers and he’s back, they say he’s a murderer too -”

Bella, even after 25 years, still calls Andromeda her sister. Sure, Ted and Dora can rot - nay, she wants to actively kill them -, but Andy is her sister. Walburga declares that Sirius is no son of hers. She cut ties with him just as much as he cut ties with them. He lived with the Potters until Alphard died and miraculously left him gold; he didn't have a Galleon to his name otherwise. This is incredibly hurtful for a child. He was sixteen.

So. Anyways. This is getting rambly, but I hope I got my point across.

As for pure headcanons, that have no actual basis in the text:

All the Blacks are hot, but Orion & Burgie were not the hottest of them. That title goes to Alphard & Lucretia and then Sirius & Bellatrix in the next generation.

Orion is like Regulus in nature, and Walburga is like Sirius. Ice and Fire. On the other hand, physically, Sirius looks like his dad and Reggie looks like his mum. (Which is not to say much because they are second cousins, and the Black genes are strong lol)

(By the way, they are second cousins guys, not first cousins, not brother and sister!)

Orion wears exclusively shades of black and grey.

He's a quiet man, likes to read, despises noise.

A heavy drinker since he was young, it became a coping mechanism after Sirius' turbulent teenage years, almost drank himself to death when Regulus died. That's not what got him in the end, but it could have very well been.

Walburga always had a temper on her, could scream like a banshee, but she wasn't insane until one son abandoned her for the lowliest of scum and she lost her youngest boy and her husband in the span of six? three? months.

Austere. I can imagine her with her hair pinned up, high necklines... always very proper, with a severe type of beauty. I really like that aesthetic for her.

Crack: Definitely involved in the infamous Love Triangle of '43 when Tom Riddle tried to ask her out (to get access to the Black Family library's Dark Arts books) and she rejected him (not my headcanon btw, I remember reading it on here but I can't remember who came up with it rn - if anyone knows, I'll give credit!). Guess who was smitten with him? Alphard. Chaos of the kind you're thinking ensues.

Theirs was a semi-arranged marriage (there were wink-wink, nudge-nudges from other members of the family and the two of them decided it would be advantageous). I don't think they loved each other but they had a good partnership, gave the House of Black two heirs. (lol, see how that turned out)

Walburga had pregnancy issues, which I headcanon for every single woman of the House of Black, except the only one who was-maybe-sorta-kinda relying on them: Andromeda.

That's all, folks!

(I think.)

[isavsi]

i am actually curious (and take your time with this) whats your interpretation of Jeff? like if you were Jeff's creator, how would you write and design him?

YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW HAPPY THIS ASK MADE ME

alright i'm gonna rant A LOT

i gotta say, it's practically impossible to make a version of a character without having some type of influence from others art. i've consumed a LOT of fanart lately and i might have taken some inspiration from these users: @/shatteredankles (idk if they have a tumblr, pls let me know!), @/antlergrave, and @/imalovernotabiter

their version of jeff and the way they draw him really gets me. like, idk how to explain. it's a work of art LITERALLY. i want to eat it. 13yrs me would SCREAM. also i love how we all collectively decided to give him piercings

i know every jeff's art with piercings it's a banger!!!

and as far as i love people drawing jeff's bald ass i don´t think i'll ever be capable of

yeah it's realistic but it's so fun to draw him emo and conventionally attractive actually i'm sure he would look horrible in my art without hair

this is the first sketch of him (i wanted to have a good reference bc i ended up doing a full piece that you can see here)

about his design

i wanted to give jeff a more dramatic smile scar, no nose, no eyebrows etc. although i didn't like how my style portrayed him without eyelids so...

AND his body is covered in burns

i also imagine him being around 20 to 30 yrs and still in his emo phase (i love emos)

about his story

im more familiar about the jeffrey woods' story than the hodek's, so i think im going to kept that???? i think

ive read something recently about him having central nervous system depression, paranoid hallucinations and bipolar disorder, and it makes total sense. also that he's more of a sociopath that a psychopath. he might and will resort to violence and hostility due to his past experience

bc of his hallucinations, it's hard for him to tell what is and isn't real

he craves stimulation constantly to distract himself about his own mind. that stimulation being killing or alcohol

also, he doesn't have any supernatural powers. he's a regular human. and has a really bad eye sight, like he can fight well in close combat but in anything else he sucks

aaand that's it

i don't think that most of what i wrote has sense bc i was suddenly dropping any idea i had in my mind

[pinkeoni]

Arguing for realism in Stranger Things

So whenever the take "Mike and Will can't be together because it's not realistic" comes up, usually from twitter or reddit, I often find it met with the argument on here of "Well, this is a supernatural show about monsters so who cares about realism!" or something similar along those lines.

While I understand the the sentiment behind it, and yes advocating for realism in a sci-fi fantasy show may seem silly, but I find this argument to be kind of flawed.

The initial take isn't coming a genuine advocacy for realism, but instead using "realism" as a flimsy cover for their homophobia. The more appropriate response should be to question why they believe a happy resolve for homosexuality is unrealistic in the first place. You countering their argument by claiming that the show is unrealistic is only backing up their belief that a happy ending for gay people is also unrealistic.

Stranger Things is a realistic show.

And, okay, ST does not fall into the same category of cinéma-vérité-dogme-95-esque-hyper-realism that a show like Succession may fall under, but it does try to capture real emotions and real experiences using supernatural elements as a vehicle to explore such things. Sure, alternate dimensions and tentacle monsters are not realistic, but the American government trying to coverup and undermine the suffering of queer people, as well as the constant fear of an encroaching foreign power, is incredibly realistic to that time period.

It's not often caught on from the casual viewer because it's carefully placed under layers of subtext, although in the show's defense for some of these viewers the Reagan/Bush signs from season 2 are purely just set pieces and don't have any further meaning. But the supernatural elements are not arbitrarily placed and the show doesn't take place in the 80's simply for the nostalgia factor, these facets all work together to speak to real experiences.

And sure, sometimes even the non-supernatural elements can come off as exaggerated, such as the Russian storyline, but one could argue that this is a dramatization of very real Cold War anxieties that did exist at this time.

So, when it comes to displaying realistic emotions, why should the way the show handles queer identity and relationships be any different?

And the show does handle queerness in an almost tragically realistic way. The show’s queer characters must adhere to the precedents of the 1980’s, and the supernatural element is one way to exemplify some of those fears. Will lives in fear of something slowly taking over and killing his body, while the Reagan Administration government scientists treat his possible death as a non-issue.

If then, the show is realistic and aiming to portray queer experiences as such, does this mean that byler can’t happen because that would be unrealistic?

Well, I think that people might he conflating “realism” with “pessimism.” I think if the show wanted to have an ending with a pessimistic outlook, then I could see byler not happening. Yes, there are plenty of gay people who died during the 80’s. But there also plenty of gay people who got in relationships and lived too. What people consider realistic may also be influenced by the type of media they have consumed in the past as well. “Well, gay people usually die/end up alone, so that must be what the realistic outcome is.”

So, with all that being said, when considering the ending of the show, it now just comes down to everything else. What is the show trying to say thematically? How has the show handled other character’s storylines in the past? How is the show being written? What kind of ending is being foreshadowed? What type of ending would best serve to fulfill the needs of the themes and storybeats, while still maintaining relatability?

[cinamun]

Mercy came in like

It’s always the nicest and quietest ones who are the deadliest 😂. I don’t blame Mercy for being hesitant. She doesn’t know Eva from Adam and to meet her in such a way is not a good look. We don’t really know Eva either. We just know her from scenes with Jayce and the university. I’m happy that Jayce has a sibling but he’s got to remember that not everyone you come across has good intentions. He’s just blinded by the excitement of having a sister and the betrayal of his dad. He’s trying to do right by Eva but slow down because he doesn’t even know her either. He only knows that she’s excellent at tickling the ivory keys.

Mercy meeting Eva during a signing of the deed is like Eva saying to Mercy “run me my money”

Jayce out here trying to hand Eva the code to the vault and it might turn out to not be his sister. I say this because Cinamun you like to f*** shit up. Your pen game is dramatic so I’m just waiting for the DNA test result.

Eva isn’t exactly declining the offer either.

I really like the way Eva shifted the energy tho.

I don't think Mercy was expecting this and perhaps it brought her murder levels down a lil bit. I also feel like, realistically, why isn't anyone calling for a DNA test? That's suspicious. We just gon' believe Bertie? I need more evidence.

[sleepsentry]

Hoooooooooboyyyyyyyyy...

I've spent most of my years in the gravity falls fandom as a kid/teen.

And I kinda resent seeing adult fans turn a comforting kids show about embracing your inner kid and not being ashamed of fun, into a dramatic, petty morality obsessed, soap opera...

Like- its really uncomfortable the way most of the adult characters are depicted in fanon, it doesn't feel "more realistic" it feels like the adult fans are kind of ashamed of any interpretation that isn't "acceptably mature".

______

For example: The way Stan and Ford are turned into the worst versions of Batman.

Stan and Ford are often depicted with a subtle but important edge that isn't necessarily present in canon.

Especially in fanworks wich focuse on them instead of the broader family.

As if their softer, goofier sides are just a front for the sake of the kids rather than fundamental parts of who they are as characters.

They're not.

They're just as important as their more "serious grown up moments"

Stan and Ford aren't adult characters in an adult show, they're adult characters in a kids show and their silliness is essential.

Their approachable, softer, kinder, moments, are vital, as authority figures in a show where the intended audience is expected to relate to the children they are responsible for.

Their vulnerability and screwing up is an important aspect of the show, showing kids that adults don't know everything and it's important to question them when they make mistakes.

"Adults are often just as afraid as you are and it's OK for them to express that, it's also important that they don't make it you're responsibility to deal with" is at the core of the way Stan, Ford and most adults in the show are depicted.

It's a comforting and affirming theme to have in a show about two kids on the brink of losing that childhood wonder, or at least afraid of losing it.

As Mabel says:

"They got... stupid. Promise me we won't get stupid."

______

I've seen so many adults make these characters more "adult" to appeal to them and it isn't even bad, it's just uncomfortable... it feels wrong.

Fiddleford is another adult character that I often see treated like this:

A lot of depictions of younger fidds I've seen (especially within the context of shipping him with ford) basically turn him into a conflicted love interest lady having an affair with her negligent boss in a stupid 80s movie-

I'm not getting into how fiddauthor is being used as a "safe ship" by the broader fandom and being stripped of its nature as a character dynamic and used as a tool to excuse morality based shaming and harassment by grown adults over stupid cartoon men-with cucumber shaped noses

It gives off similar vibes to certain queer peeps appealing to homophobes by throwing less "digestible" queer people under the bus and its not that serious its cartoon shipping for fucks sake

it's so uncomfortable when you remember he's a silly little hillbilly man.

His name is FIDDLEFORD.

MC. GUCKET. (•□•)

He's got depth and serious moments for days but he's also introduced screaming and jigging and slapping a sandwich out of someone's hands.

He contains multitudes withing his vegetable shaped head.

He's not Ford's frustrated underpaid secretary (as funny as that sounds)

______

Emotional depth and maturity aren't exclusively adult things.

The bloody "Goofy Movie" isn't suddenly an adult film because it has moments of quiet maturity and melancholy, along-side the expected goofyness.

That sense of quiet maturity isn't age locked in reality and I'm so tired of it feeling like it is.

It's not wrong or bad to depict more mature things with a story and characters aimed at kids.

But I think it's very disingenuous to dismiss the lighter elements in favour of the moments that "go over kids heads" they don't.

Even if the kid doesn't understand the adult joke, they can tell something is off and it's annoying how smug grown ups are about it.

I know Gravity Falls itself has that tone so I might aswell be complaining about fire burning or ice melting.

But it's taken to such extremes that it makes my inner kid feel like grown ups are twisting one of the few things I have and making it about themselves again... that's uncomfortably personal and petty I know.

But the reality is, that's been my experience for the majority of my time in this fandom.

Only in the past few years have I grown out of the "baby fan" vibe and it's going to shape my reactions to fanworks regardless.

______

For another example cartoon characters swearing isn't bad.

But it's jarring when adult behaviours (which more often than not means behaving like an ass) are superimposed onto child friendly characters, and these behaviours are taken for granted as "more realistic and natural" it's just... like no that's not true.

There are adults who don't like swearing or drinking or smoking, there are kids I knew when I was little (11 - 14) who enjoyed doing all those things for better or worse.

Seeing Teenagers complaining about 40+ year old characters being "infantilised" or "UwU-ified" as if grown ups can't be vulnerable is just saddening.

Adult female fans complaining that male characters aren't "man enough" is kinda scary to be honest, especially when those softer depictions are usually from teens and maybe even young boys/men in my case.

The problem is behaviours and perspectives are so strictly coded and enforced that even in a sub-community of a sub-community you get people enforcing arbitrary codes of conduct or depiction.

It's a kids show.

Relax.

He said to himself as much as whoever bothered to read this far.

I'm gonna go have a glass of water and some fresh air, if you've read this far I'd recommend doing so too but also, despite the tone of this wall of text, I'm not your dad.

[avelera]

Still thinking about the post that scoffs at the idea of Stede being a Dom because he demands respect and then has to rather pathetically add, "... Please?" to the end as if that's proof that the desire (which can lead eventually to the capability) to be dominant and authoritative isn't there.

At the risk of repeating the absolutely stunningly obvious over something that was probably a joke, the reason Stede being bad at Dom stuff like dominance and authority is only further proof that it's a desire of his, albeit one he has to work at making into a reality, is because this is a comedy.

One of my favorite points made in Steven Kaplan's "The Hidden Tools of Comedy" is, to paraphrase, that comedy is about failure. Specifically, a failure of possessing all the tools to achieve what we desire.

Which is to say, we all have goals in life. In a drama, people tend to have the tools they need to achieve their goals. Whereas in a comedy, they lack them.

And I don't just mean things like, "In a drama, a character has a goal to save the world and also has the tools (or gains the tools) to achieve this goal." I mean really basic stuff.

Stuff like, "In a drama, a character's goal is to have an amazing first kiss with the love of their life. They have all the tools necessary: mutual attraction, skill at kissing, good breath. The tools they need to have an amazing first kiss are there, in their possession."

Whereas in a comedy, these tools are not guaranteed. A really common comedy beat might be, say, wanting to kiss the love of your life and being stressed out because you just had a garlic-y meal and your breath smells bad. Or the protagonist just isn't very good at kissing and it's messy and embarrassing. Or they lean in for the perfect kiss only to realize to their horror that the attraction isn't mutual.

Comedy is about taking away the tools to make a story go perfectly or smoothly. That's why comedy is often used as a tool to make stories more realistic, because in the real world, we don't always have the perfect minty-fresh breath and kissing technique to knock our crush's socks off with that first kiss. We are often inadequate and uncertain and prone to foolish mistakes.

Now, keep in mind though, that comedy is as much an elevated, often abstract style as drama is. We're only mimicking real life. So while comedy drags our heroes from the heavens of dramatic, anguished perfection back down to earth, comedy is also exaggerating the number of tools we might have missing at any one point. But we've all been there, a little, with not having the tools at our disposal to make the moment as perfect as we imagine in our heads. But by the same token, we've had weighty, dramatic moments that aren't comedic. First kisses that went great.

So, to bring this back to Stede and Ed - OFMD is a comedy.

Stede wants to be authoritative and respected as a fearsome pirate captain (of his own stripe) but, because he lacks the tools like the easy command with which Ed governs his ship, he has to tack on a pathetic, "Please?" to his demands for respect. But the desire is there. The desire is real and presumably he will gain skill at achieving what he wants, to be respected, so that he is able to command respect at a suitably dramatic moment or at least in the right dramatic company like that of Ed, who has always respected and indeed put Stede on a pedestal. For most of S1, just about everyone who meets Stede thinks he's a bumbling fool, but not Ed. Even at Stede's most bumbling and pathetic, Ed was always impressed by his audacity. They've always clicked they've always been comfortable together when it's just the two of them and the nerves go away.

And I think, far more than being impressed by some guy with natural viciousness or authority managing to command respect as a pirate captain, we've seen time and again that Ed is actually more likely to be impressed by someone like Stede who tries, like a total lunatic, to command respect while having literally none of those natural tools in his favor. Where everyone else saw someone pathetic for doing that, Ed has always seen the absolute balls it takes for Stede to leave everything he knew behind to try to live a pirate's life, while still marching to his own tune.

[moe-broey]

Got any body type/anatomy thoughts? FEH has very little in the way of body type variation and I personally like reading that as an open invitation to get silly with it.

OKAOKAYOKAY!!!!!!!! I MIGHT. Have gathered everything.... but I have SOOOOOOO MANY THOUGHTS ON THIS bc you're absolutely right!!!!! It's like a canvas to me...

I have a few directions I take with it! My main one, is to extrapolate features that may be present in the canon design. Taking them Further. I'm so sorry to do this but he is the epitome of this for me, GUSTAV JUMPSCARE 😨😨😨😨😰😰😰

But this is what I mean! I see canon Gustav has a full beard, is big and muscular. Okay. In my mind's eye, that translates to Big Hefty Heavyset type of muscular builds that are more realistic than the 6 pack bulging muscles (that require a lot of prep/dehydration to Look Like That). Also, hairy. Which is why, to fully demonstrate this, he's.... I don't know what he's doing here. This was psychologically taxing on me, but then I reminded myself I Am An Artist and I Hate America. 🫡🧍

Sometimes, if a character fits a certain archetype, I might put a few personal touches into them... mom/mom-like characters who REALLY embody the Doting Caretaker archetype often get the same body type as my own mother. A little honorary thing... though I do wanna be careful as to not restrict a specific body type (esp fat bodies) to specifically stereotypes (aka "mom bod"). Also, a comparison to Sharena! They do share similarities! Henriette's face looks familiar though... and not quite in the way Sharena's does.

Another focal reason I started off w Gustav though, is the second biggest thing I'm Always Thinking About when it comes to character's body types. Which is, Telling A Story.

I've had.... SO many oddly specific hcs about Alfonse...... for So Long..... one of them that's always in the back of my mind is him being at different weights during specific periods of his life. That, for the majority of it/esp his youth, he was almost waifish. He only starts looking healthier when he's out from under his parents' (COUGH gustavCOUGH) thumb (but let's be real, Henriette can be EXTREMELY stressful too... opposite end of the spectrum about it).

Another example of Telling A Story though. Sometimes I trans characters just for funsies and it has no real bearing on anything. OTHER times... my trans headcanons are integral to specific lore beats in my elaborate inner world. ENTER. BRUNO

These are actually from a bit ago I was gonna hold off on posting til I felt I had everything together, BUT. BUT. It's extremely relevant!

In the beginning, I often asked myself, "Why doesn't ANY of the Askr trio recognize Bruno as Zacharias?" MY ANSWER. Is that he looked quite different!!!! In tandem with my silly hcs for him, I feel that Bruno is someone who must care a lot about his appearance. About Looking masculine. I think he's been out as a man by the time he joins the Order, but is early on in his transition (by whatever means that manifests in w ✨ Magic ✨ and shit!!). I think he passes, but definitely Looked Different. Give him More Muscle and a haircut and an even more noticeable voice drop and top surgery he dramatically shows off at every opportunity and a mask that conceals his big beautiful brown eyes with fluttery soft eyelashes and like. Who Is That Mysterious Man...... in that Damnable Mask.........

Okay. Let's back up a minute. What do you mean Lif got mysteriously taller. What does that even mean. I can grant him gaining more weight/muscle, but, Taller???? At his grown up age....?? Well.

Hel's memory of the mortals she claims isn't so good, apparently.... (Eir obviously can't tell anything by the nearly all rotted away bones, but the scraggly long hair is giving her pause...) (also is it the King Hel is thinking of in the first place....? Eir isn't going to ask.)

At this point, I definitely could feel myself getting distracted and decided to just art dump a handful of charas I have strong visions for.

Here, you also see The Secret Third Option of body type design philosophy -- which is. If the design itself isn't giving me a lot to work with. I just do my own thang LMFAOOO 😅 I think Anna def fell into that category for me... where a lot of the story/lore I added for her was purely hc territory, and I went from there. She's broad, tall, muscular, top heavy, but still kinda thin and knobby. Aerodynamic, perhaps....

Sometimes, characters are a combination of these things though... like Mirabilis definitely being a combo of qualities, having personal touches, storytelling elements to her, and doing my own thing for funsies! More about the fairies overall -- I think they all ended up having their basic needs met and were even granted dreams/desires for themselves after becoming Alfar (like becoming exactly as you see yourself, or how you wish to be... which unfortunately only goes so far, can't fully undo the damage done to Mira, but. It's free transition for Triandra, is what I'm getting at LMFAOOO). Which is why each of them did fill out more to varying degrees (again, Mira suffering the most long-term effects from her mortal life, and Triandra, already having an idea/concept of herself at the age she drank the nectar, being able to transition). I have specific human design concepts for them too, that look A Bit different than their fairy designs.... but. I'm still working on that 🧍

Eir is def a storytelling one. When it comes to Alfonse's scrawniness, he was just stressed out so bad it took a physical toll. I don't think there was ever any food restriction (or, if there was, it was a rare occasion/used as a punishment). For Eir, I think something like that would make sense for her though.... lack of access, and frequent meticulously purposeful elaborate abuse from Hel. Eir still looks like you could break her in half, but she does look a lot healthier since her stay in Askr. Another note, though I ran out of space... maybe Ymir looks more like Eir than Hel does. I wonder why that could be....

AND. BACK TO THE START. Extrapolating on canon design elements! If you're going to present me a female chara with big honking bazongas, I'm going to make her fat. Or at very least, Carry Some Weight, like Plumeria does (in that full figured curvy way!). And ESP. ESPPPPPP FOR SEIDR AND GULLVEIG. Where Gullveig has Various Lines about "Oh... I don't know how well these old clothes fit me anymore..." (paraphrasing/off memory I feel like she says something like this Multiple Times). Like. Okay. Well I took that personally. I also just like the idea of her changing over time... always having a chubbier build, but it just keeps going as she keeps growing and changing.

In putting this into words, I'm finding a common thread seems to be weight gain as a sign that someone is being taken care of... for Gullveig, I think it's just a purely neutral change over the course of her life. In Lif's case....... some sort of mix up occurred. I can see Alfonse taking more after Gustav naturally, too, as he gets older though!

One final thought is just, is there a fun little detail I can include? Like giving Seidr and the Seidrs a snake-like face? Doubling as something so cutes and something Intimidating? IT WILL BE DONE. Also Need to get to coloring an illust of Gullveig one day..... the golden stretch marks are soooo cool in my mind's eye...... also just. One Million Piercings. Also as characterization/storytelling. A lack thereof is storytelling, as well.... to me..... ALSO!!!!! SHAPE LANGUAGE!!!!!! I'M SUCH A SHAPE LANGUAGE BITCH!!!!!!!!!

I HOPE. THIS ANSWER FINDS YOU WELL 🫡

[alpaca-clouds]

On Writing Healing (Physically and Mentally)

Last day of my "I complain about certain things I notice in a lot of writing" week. And last thing that kinda annoys me (well, not the last, but the last I will speak about this week) is how healing is portrayed in a lot of media. Or rather... well, how it isn't portrayed.

Because, let's face it: Physical healing is very rarely addressed in media. With this I mean... Well, usually media kinda tends to either just handwave the kinds of injuries our heroes should have. I mean, in a lot of media that is very action heavy, you can go there with someone working in trauma medicine, and they will tell you the many ways in which this action hero or heroine by now would already be dead, or at the very least bound to bed rest for weeks. But at most they have a few bruises and scratches, that look dramatic, but generally will not hinder them.

When a hero in media gets actually injured, this often happens at the very end of a fight, and either the story ends with "well, he was very injured, but he would make a recovery soon enough" with us never really having to see the character recovering, or there might be an epilogue being set after the character has already recovered. And of course this kind of recovery tends to usually be perfect. People do not have chronic pain issues or anything from any physical trauma they have gone through during their plot. There is no tinitus from having stood to close to explosions or having been present in shoot outs.

And of course, there is rarely ever a case where a character has an injury that ends up with them permanently disabled, even if it would be realistic for the kind of stuff they have experienced. Hell, even if something like that happened (like with "Rhodey" in the MCU), this will often still be handwaved or magically/technically corrected.

In reality, physical healing is often a slow and hard thing. Even if you heal completely (something that is just never guaranteed - even if it is a simple break of a finger bone) you might have a longer journey in front of you than you expect. Not always does healing work out perfectly.

It is this, that also gives me some pause in terms of magical healing abilities. Because... Look, if something heals slowly and does not heal perfectly, you can intervene. When you heal it within minutes/hours something that heals badly might leave you with much larger issues along the line. But that is something we never see. And I am kinda annoyed by that. It would be such an interesting plot point.

Or on the other hand: If magical healing is perfect always, what does this do for people who get hurt and healed a lot. Be it this one fighter who ends every day with broken bones and stab wounds, or - let's face it - someone who in that world might cater then to sadists and stuff as a form of sex worker? How would those people even relate to pain if their minds learn that injuries are nothing to worry about? Do their bodies maybe stop to show self-defense reflexes? (For those who read my Tav stories know that it is something I explore with him a lot. He was tortured and healed a lot as a kid, and because of it he does no longer show normal reactions to pain, coming across as inhuman because of it. He just no longer recognizes realistically lethal wounds as such, because he is so used to magic healing.)

And the same goes double with mental healing and healing from trauma. I kinda spoke about this two days ago, so I will not go into it too much.

Often in media trauma exists to have "a point". It basically builds towards the carthasis of a story, when the character will have this great teary recognition and then they get over their trauma and if it is fantasy they will probably get a new power to go along with it. Hurray!

And of course, the kind of trauma that the characters would have logically acquired during the plot of whatever story never really gets addressed, because usually the story will frame it as a positive experience.

I always found this so funny in regards to my original fandom - Digimon. You have those 10yo kids in a world of monsters, where they are in life threatening situations every other day with no refuge. Where they see other die, and things destroyed and what not. And the show goes: "Isn't this a good driver of character development?!" Which, like... Don't get me wrong. I love it. I love this show. I love the big emotional punches it does. But if I look at it realistically, of course... Those kids need a fucking good therapist, don't they?

And of course you can basically put in every scifi, fantasy or action story in here, as well. Usually there is nothing that involves action and epicness where the characters are not in at least one situation that would give them some PTSD. If not a prolonged situation that might lead to CPTSD.

And this does not get acknowledged in any way most of the time. And if it gets acknowledged, the healing for it gets skipped over as well.

Again, I will point back at the Wednesday blog. The messiness of mental healing is just not portrayed. The way how there are good days and bad days. Or how at times people healing from trauma will be massive assholes to the people around them, which is not fully their fault - because it is the trauma talking in the end - but it never really gets shown. Again: It is why I love Bojack Horseman so much. Because it shows this so well in a way that I rarely ever saw in media.

Generally... I just would love to see a lot more stories about healing. About the different kinds of healing, too. Because people are different - in both body and "soul". And because they are different, not two people will heal fully the same way. And I just would love to see more of that.

I mean, heck. That is half the reason why I write fics. Because I love to explore this topic so much. :P

[monsterpie]

My thoughts on the Pride comics:

(Below the cut is my opinions on both the Toradeen AND Spellentine comics)

Toradeen comic:

Overall, it was a cute comic. They somehow made Toralei and Clawdeen cute together, props to them. That said... it's a random-ass pairing. There is no way those two would have ever dated each other in g1. They didn't like each other and they didn't even spend time together alone if they could help it. It was very clearly a ship made because they thought dog x cat would be good. I think if it were a comic about, say, Ghoulia and Kjersti instead, it would've been better and more realistic.

The two new characters, Bridgett and Jackie, were very cute. It is VERY hard to believe that they're Monster High students, though. I thought they were college age or young adults. In my mind, they seemed around 25 years old. Regardless, they were quite endearing. I thought the lesson they taught Toradeen about respecting your partner's boundaries and understanding their needs was a very important lesson for people to learn, whether they be kids or adults reading the comic.

The comic was pretty well-paced. It did a good job with the amount of pages it was given and didn't drag things out or rush through too much. The art style was cute. There were small additions made to the world that I enjoyed, like the existence of the fire-salamanders and how they seem to be popular to catch and use to cook things like marshmallows. Overall, it was pretty solid and a relatively enjoyable read once I ignored the fact that, again, it is an INCREDIBLY random ship.

Spellentine comic:

I... honestly don't have a lot of nice stuff to say about this comic. 😬

I think Spelldon really didn't have much personality at all. I think that it is also a disservice to have Spelldon's first introduction outside of an obscure diary mention be a comic that isn't about him. I think they didn't do a good job of establishing Spelldon's personality or character or motivations or... well, anything really. If they had, for instance, leaned more into Spelldon being clumsy like when he accidentally tripped and bumped his head, or if they made him a little more judgmental like when he said Valentine's fake Southern accent was bad, maybe that would've at least made him more memorable.

I also think they made Valentine... off. I'm aware that his personality in WDGFIL was largely a farce, but his personality in the comic didn't feel like him at all, neither the suave and cool self from the movie nor the accepting and calm self from the SDCC diary. He was... well, emotional and whiny. Annoying, frankly. His entire SDCC diary was about accepting things and growing as a person, and although he seemed to have SOME of that in the comic, he was also ready to stop feeling love at the drop of a hat - something which is especially confusing when we remember that Mrs. Goblin from the diary specifically mentioned that free and true love was so important for emotional vampires, and also something that doesn't feel like a decision he would make given the fact that he's supposed to, y'know, have come to terms with and accepted the fact that things won't always go his way. Teenagers are dramatic, I understand that, but in his SDCC diary he had come to terms with the fact that Draculaura and her friends might never come to trust and forgive him, but that he still wanted to prove himself to them if it was possible. In the comic, Draculaura turns his invitation to fang out down in the kindest possible way and he reacts like...that. It didn't feel like him at all.

The comic itself felt badly-paced and rushed. It felt like they had too much that they wanted to do and not enough pages to do it, resulting in feeling rushed. Valentine's decision to give up on love forever, Spelldon's first official appearance giving him almost zero time to establish himself, a potion-making quest, a lesson about... whatever they were trying to teach (acceptance? again? I guess?)... it was just too much. Maybe a full-length comic could've tackled it better, but I think this short one couldn't do it. They should've cut out some parts (my vote is to cut the not-wanting-to-love part out and instead have Spelldon and Valentine just need to make a potion for class or whatever). Another problem with the comic was that it was largely ruled by Valentine, rather than both boys equally. Spelldon made almost zero impression because Valentine was so loud, both in personality and in amount of words spoken, leaving Spelldon to kind of flounder behind.

The relationship itself was... fine. There really wasn't much any substance whatsoever. Person A takes care of Person B. It just didn't feel like it had much going for it. Their personalities seemed to mesh alright as friends, but as boyfriends... I don't know, to me it just doesn't work. It's not like Jackie and Bridgett where they're differing personalities that still work in the end, it just feels like... guy-who-will-inevitably-be-overlooked and his boyfriend, the guy with giant neon signs pointing him out.

Also, small gripe: I really wish Spelldon hadn't called Valentine's fake accent dumb lmfao. Valentine said he liked the accent, and I think if he had explained that it made him feel comfortable and confident around others, and also explained that he just *liked* doing it regardless, that would've been a sweet characterization moment that I could've truly believed.

A personal gripe and overall criticism: I still, even now all these years later, think it was an absolutely horrific idea to make Valentine gay. Like, catastrophically bad. The guy preyed on a bunch of innocent ghouls and stole their ability to love for centuries (for some, if not all of them, that probably meant their entire lives), but, oh, it's okay guys! He's gay! He was just doing it because he was gay! Sometimes men hurt every women in their loves because their true soulmate is gay! This isn't about his ability to change - he CAN change and he DID change. This is about the optics of it: the (at the time of the SDCC diary) ONLY "confirmed" (in loose quotes because that was bullshit back then too) gay character in the children's media Monster High was one of, and I can NOT stress this enough, the WORST VILLAINS THAT MONSTER HIGH HAD EVER HAD. Just another evil gay trope. Again, yes, he did change and get better... but how many people have read his SDCC diary? How many people even know it exists? Probably not many casual fans, probably not anybody who was a kid when the movie came out and is now seeing this comic on shelves a few years later. He should've just been straight. In my mind, he is. That way, at least, I don't have to worry about yet another evil gay in kids media.

Anyway, things I liked about the comic: Spelldon's design was really nice, I enjoyed seeing Whisp again even if it was very brief, I thought Valentine apologizing to Draculaura and attempting to befriend her was very sweet, as was her apologizing to him at the end of the comic while still maintaining her boundaries and not trying to change her schedule too much for him, and I thought it was funny that Spelldon and Valentine were going around and stealing shit for a useless potion lmfao.

[rontra]

I have never played persona so I wasn't sure if I would understand your failteacher comics but I just looked up the characters for a little bit of context and I'm 👀👀👀👀 at it now xD

Without being too spoiler-y, why would you say they'd have a messy relationship? (Besides the fact of Becky taking advantage of her client's loneliness)

HAHAHA yea i think the like dramatic irony enjoyment of knowing (even just roughly) what's going on with becky is very strong so good on you there (obviously toriumi has no idea what's going on with her and becky is doing her best to Handle It, but it contextualizes her behavior for Us...<3)

it's yummy isnt it... its yummy

anyway, the rest of this very long post is just me analyzing a fictional situation i myself engineered, so if that sounds boring please dont click the Read More LMFAO <- cursed to put a lot of thought into Character Stuff

basically they have great potential for mess, which they're Currently keeping a lid on, but would exponentially increase with time. teehee.

as for what WILL happen, im not spoiling anything concrete of course… (winks at the Knowers who already know my Vision….

well, this AU isn't ever going to devolve into a "super destructive toxic nightmare" mess or anything, just to get our working definitions of 'mess' sorted out at the top of the post. not this time. atm (as of comic #3) it's shaping up more like a "this seems . inadvisable and absolutely Don't Try This At Home, but i guess it won't…kill you" mess (LMAO)

to assess their situation at present… there is one half who wants money (and can't ever make enough of it to satisfy her extortionists), and one half who wants intimacy (and is scared and unable to get it on her own). on its exterior face, it's simply a lonely person hiring a professional to keep them company, which is a fairly common thing n not rly super noteworthy; the parentheticals are what make things a bit uh thorny for these characters

the "problem" here is not the transaction itself; they're both willing to supply their half of the trade just fine, and neither party is doing anything wrong by engaging in it. but for these two specifically, there is also a mutual willingness to bend the rules of their transaction—because they're both cornered in some way, and desperate for what the other one is offering to trade

to elaborate on "rules", i mean, first and foremost, that their relationship is not "real"—these people Don't know each other personally and intimately, and they're Not Supposed To. their relationship should never be "real"; they're not friends! (or lovers, for that matter!) they're in a conditional exchange of money for services. right now, these characters are participating in and maintaining a kayfabe; they should operate under a tacit understanding that A) this is not real, B) they both fully know it's not real, and C) following the script is the comfortable way to get what they both want without causing undue risk to either party. creating and then maintaining a fake "reality" together is regulated by a contract between them, and it ends when their booked time ends (and not a minute over time!)

but to return to the earlier point, they're also both cornered and desperate, which drives them both to go beyond what might be considered appropriate. i think this is compelling; it's probably unnecessary of me to add this paragraph but i want to underline (just in case) that i don't think either of them is like "at fault" or w/e (there is no "villain" between them). they're showing Signs Of Mess that could snowball into something much more messy, but it's not something they're doing to hurt each other; they're making decisions based on skewed risk/reward estimations that might not be healthy, and could realistically have harmful consequences for both parties, but they're not, like, Evil (lol). two women getting wrapped up in each other's personal graveyard spirals…it's yuri, isn't it?

with that squared away, and putting it plainly;

toriumi should not be asking her to "break character" when the character itself is what she's paying for; this nudging of their little kayfabe, if indulged, could easily snowball and erode the professional boundaries between them (what she calls "distance" in #3). she is paying 'becky' to 'be here' (paying kawakami to conjure 'becky' into existence by pretending to be her), but she isn't really being mindful of the type of role that this necessarily demands of her in turn. the built-in emotional walls between them are there to protect both of them, but she doesn't fully respect them (despite instinctively sensing their protection in how "safe" becky feels to her). in the end, toriumi is bad at "staying in character" herself, and she can't help but try to root out the actual person behind the mask—despite the fact that no one wants this erosion to happen! possible dire consequences for her wallet aside, losing sight of the line between "transaction" and "investment" (pardon the pun) is a one-way ticket to a very messy place where one or both of them is likely to get hurt...

on the other end, and not helping the situation at all, kawakami identified toriumi as a soft target pretty much immediately, and is actively trying to elicit sympathy and endear herself to her (she is being quite choosy about what vulnerabilities she "lets slip" in #2) in order to make her keep booking and paying. of course some amount of "salesmanship" is part of the job—#grindset always be plugging smash that like button comment n subscribe—but the major difference here is that she's overtly attempting to foster in her client the exact kind of dependency/personal attachment she should be discouraging (for, frankly, both of their safety). like not only is she out fishing to get toriumi hook line and sinker on purpose, but it's also alarmingly reckless behavior on kawakami's part; there's a lack of regard for her own wellbeing involved here on top of it all. again, a messy place where someone, maybe everyone, gets hurt in the end

crucially though, as comic #3 finishes setting up, they're both willing to endure these shenanigans from the other half. at this stage, toriumi does realize that kawakami has her unilaterally wrapped around her finger, and nonetheless agrees that she'll call her again; while kawakami knows very well how this kayfabe is supposed to work, but is indulgent (even rewarding) towards toriumi for her clumsiness. that mutual willingness to keep playing this game would—if the AU continued on these tracks uninterrupted—probably compound until the situation they've made becomes super confusing and unclear for them emotionally...

of course "taking advantage" is sort of a loaded phrase colloquially… but i would say in many ways they are "taking advantage" of each other, yea. the "we both benefit, so it's okay" logic was already vaguely raised as justification in #3; if elaborated a bit with the above in mind, their situation is one where "even if they're both overstepping what is considered appropriate for their arrangement, they've also both decided the benefits outweigh the costs by a wide enough margin to make it worthwhile"

it's got the marks of a sort of symbiotic relationship... their individual motivations for being involved w each other are totally unrelated (cue the "hold on, does. kawakami even like women???" question), but they both feel they benefit enough towards their priority goals to be OK with the other one taking something "less valuable" from them (toriumi even calls out the “sales pitch” becky is doing in #2, but ultimately decides that’s fine because she’s willing to buy). i think each and every moving part here has great capacity to go "too far" and ruin things (perhaps even causing Severe damage in the collapse), but if the situation were to continue in this same rhythm, without that kind of dramatic change, i would say "they're both evaluating the scenario with their own personal goals in mind, and are extracting what they want from one another relatively(?) peacefully(??)". like it might ultimately be a selfish game but they're adults they'll figure it out probably idk its none of my business what they choose to get up to. wouldn't get into that type of shit myself though LOL

women are playing kind of dangerous games with each other but i forgive them because it's interesting to rotate in my mind...<3

another thorn to consider for their future bonding endeavors from here on ofc is that without being "cornered" the way they are, they would not be running this type of "risk math" in the first place. it's hard for either of them to fully back away at this point because they're already cornered in their personal lives; toriumi is incredibly isolated and lonely with a pretty insecure lifestyle even when she's NOT actively sawing through the branch she's sitting on, and kawakami famously MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE, NEEDS A LOT OF MONEY RIGHT NOW because she's being extorted by an unrelated third party. looking ahead it does kind of start to look like an ouroboros of "taking advantage of each other" bc it's hard for both of them to leave their individual situations; it's kind of like, if they weren't here with each other they'd be ... well, they'd be here—just with someone else...

they didn't put each other in this jam—it was unrelated personal circumstances and sheer coincidence that pushed them together—but now that they've committed to each other, it's hard to reverse back out, if that makes sense. i think that kind of thing is interesting too, because it makes me want to see them recognize this, connect, and help each other pull out of their Greater individual personal messes. you know? we can make it if we try... just the two of us... 😔

(unfortunately step 1 of that is ofc to make a genuine personal bond that isn't wrapped up in all this for-pay roleplay stuff. drat!)

tl;dr they're both simmering under high pressure and don't try this at home, but they do already have a sort of tacit agreement forming that this level of messy play is OK between them—as long as the rewards continue to outweigh the risks. at the end of the day, it's a delicate balance ultimately hinging on a money-for-services transaction, so if either of them stopped feeling like paying their half was worth it, it would rapidly come apart. i guess it's kinda like the ways you can tell if animals are genuinely beefing or just playing rough—are they willingly coming back? 💀 ...

no lmao where's that post thats like "this would be terrible if it was anyone else, but considering the people involved this is actually the best option" HRBHJDJG that's kind of how it feels. like if they're gonna be stuck with Somebody (and they would be), its probably good luck that they got Each Other. at least the narrative can sustain the balance of this one and maybe even solve it down the line. heart

to round this post off i would say if i had to nominate one of them, kawakami is probably the most "in control" atm—since she figured out very quickly that she was dealing with an easy mark and moved in to make her a regular customer (quite successfully i might add per the end of #3 lmaoo). i think that's been kinda fun, since in her SLink she's immediately on the back foot due to being unmasked by the inciting incident. we know she will lie and attempt to play to the listener's sympathy, so unleashing her with her Mask Still On has been fun 😭 for her part, toriumi is not only taken with the funny maid (& emotionally invested in her IRL situation to boot), but also very clumsily trying to obtain something she's scared to have, which makes her very impulsive/erratic in her rulebreaking compared to kawakami's much more intentional plays...

play of the game 🧹 (<- there's no maid emoji idk its housekeeping)

of course, my future plans will immediately jostle this entire dynamic into something else and make this whole post obsolete, but i don't wanna lay that out ahead of time. smiles.

anyway, otome dissection on the playlist or whatever

[howtofightwrite]

This show has a woman who picks up a nearby poleax/halberd in defence, visibly grunts and struggles to hold it up at barely waist level and then nearly tumbles to the ground on her first swing. She barely knows how to fight, but works with 9-10 year olds and has been seen carrying one. Swinging a weapon is probably different than carrying a kid, but how are weapons so heavy was it since it didn't look like just bad momentum. Is this unrealistic and just done for giggles?

It's extremely unrealistic, though I can't say exactly why they did this.

Halberds and poleaxes weighed a little over five pounds. We've talked about this many times, but a lot of authors (and game designers) tend to dramatically overestimate the weight of weapons. That's likely what happened here. Someone who's never even seen a polearm looking at it and thinking, “well, it must be extremely heavy, because it's big.”

There is a difference in that the weight will be balanced towards the end of the shaft, but that's still not a lot of weight. There is a legitimate point that someone without any background wouldn't how to hold the weapon effectively, and that could result in something like them holding it too low, or to high, and not being able to effectively strike with it, or defend against someone else disarming them. This could potentially result in a situation where they're putting too much force into their strikes, and end up either damaging the weapon or overextending themselves. But that's still not going to look like struggling to lift it.

This could also be the result of someone thinking that combat really is strength focused. Which, it's not. Melee combat is more about being able to continue using a weapon for an extended period of time, rather than simply being strong enough to lift and swing it. Endurance matters, strength less so.

I can't rule out the possibility that this was influenced by some baked-in misogyny. Where, even in trying to give their character some agency, the author is still presenting her as impossibly weak. But, given how lightweight polearms are, I doubt this was the primary cause, though, unconscious biases can be a very difficult issue to address in your own writing, even if you're actively trying to avoid said biases. This is something that plagues a lot of authors, even as they try to be better.

So, this isn't going to happen in a realistic context. A writer who has never checked the weight of a halberd, and vaguely remembers seeing their weight given in a video game's stat block somewhere, might dramatically overestimate the weight. (This can either be an error on the game designer's part, a balance consideration, or the weapon's weight may be misleading, either because it's a non-weight unit designed to encompass how portable an item is, the unit of measure itself may be vague, the weight may also encompass other items for the storage and maintenance of the item, or some combination of the above factors.)

-Starke

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[stillness138]

visual/art things in the Hades 2 technical test i don't like

it was said and is being said already that most of the character sprites have less dynamic poses, or that Aphrodite's face looks, for the lack of a better term, yassified,... it's actually quite a frequent topic in the tag. and i think looking closely despite the excitement is a good excercise! so let's.

i've seen a sentiment that everyone has been made (more, in some cases) conventionally attractive, and i disagree with that a little bit. depends on your definition of convention, but while it's a look popular with many, i wouldn't say Hecate's abs for example are necessarily mainstream. another point i've seen was that Demeter looks younger. i kinda agree, but i don't think it's intentional, because it's quite subtle. she's mostly just missing the defined cheekbones.

the thing about this game's art seems to be that it's a little less sharp, the lines are thinner, shadows are smoother. i think it's an attempt to look more detailed and realistic compared to the first game. i'm not sure how i feel about it. i understand the want to improve or change up, but at the same time the lack of hard shadows and highlights, while it might come across as more realistic, also leaves the sprites a little bland. and i was going to bring up Poseidon as an example where the newer style fits in with visibly older sprites, but he still feels noticeably different in how he's shaded compared to say Moros.

i also agree that the poses are simpler and in most cases less dynamic; Mel is fine and the fact she can change during dialogue adds to it, Hecate looks good too. Nemesis is justifiable since she seems to be standing guard. i think they're simpler maybe because now everyone has a detailed environment backdrop as well, it's especially bold in the olympians' case, but i do hope characters revealed in the future have more dramatic or interesting poses. Selene gives me some hope.

Artemis is definitely unfinished. her sprite lacks any bolder linework or shadows, the coloring is very dull. it really sticks out like a sore thumb as of now. but her boon icons having those letters, likely placeholders too, make it more apparent that she's not finalized yet.

now, this might be controversial, but...i don't like Apollo's design that much. in his case, i definitely wish he had a cooler pose, for his bow/lyre to be a lot more prominent. the outfit is fine, i'm kinda on the edge about it. on one hand, all the colors and shapes work, on the other, maybe not together? but what makes it all bad for me is his actual appearance. i wish his hair was wilder, actually committed to it, and brighter. i wish he wore either more elaborate jewelry or more of detailed armor pieces. i wish he had heavy freckles, vitiligo or some other skin condition to reference the surface of the sun. i think in part this is definitely a case of being spoiled by fanart, but yeah. i'm not vibing with him as much as i hoped i would. i like this design because while the outfit isn't detailed, the freckles and pose make up for it. the hair, choppy like irregular sunrays, is cool too. this one i like too, it's less crazy but still has its own flair, distinct from the rest of the first game, and the lyre/bow design is beautiful. this one is a bit out there but it's pretty cool as well imo, with apparent callbacks to Artemis in hair texture, birthmarks/crests, and the shoulder pelt.

lastly though, Aphrodite. the good! referencing Ares's warpaint is sweet. i like the armor pieces. in general the pose is tasteful, and the long ass banners coming from her spear kinda add some needed drama to it. the spear and shield themselves have nice designs in line with Aphro's overall aesthetic. but the bad... i don't like her face all that much either when compared to her sprite from the first game. there, i liked that her lips aren't exaggerated in any way. compare that to Athena (her shade of lipstick is absolutely amazing tho). but it felt more, i dunno, like trying to convey some natural beauty? in 2, she got that barbie doll treatment. reminds me of witcher 3 female npcs' faces and that is not a good thing. people have said that she looks thinner - her arms definitely do. and maybe because of that they also seem a bit too long to me. she suffers from the lack of hard shadows and highlights a lot, putting both her sprites next to each other really shows the difference in approach. like, overall it's a pretty and perfectly fine sprite, but...there is a but. a part of that but is definitely our expectations and uncertainty about the new direction the sprite art seems to be going in. to give nuance to the other side, we're also still in a pre-early access stage. on the other hand, the other olympians we've seen don't look unfinished the way Artemis does and it's quite likely these sprites is what we'll go into full release with. there was no reason to change Aphrodite's face, and we're allowed to not like it. leaving well-meaning feedback can be effective! and i would encourage it. with emphasis on well-meaning.

i also think the icon for gold in Hades 2 should be just a single coin, because a little hoard of them looks too much like the moly flower icon from a distance.