#i messaged them to apologise and try to explain and i asked if we could talk so i could explain and apologise

[gguk-n]

Turned Page (Franco Colapinto x Park Jimin's ex!Reader)

Series Masterlist

No hate to anyone this is all fiction

Face Claim- Jenna Ortega

{Reader's POV}

Jimin and I met at an award show back in 2017. I had just started acting in shows away from Disney and this was my first gig as an MC at a major award show. I had the honour of presenting an award to BTS. That's how we became friends and the eventually started dating.

Dating Jimin was like a fairytale, he was my prince charming. He would buy me flowers, plan intricate and elaborate dates. Being with him felt like I was on cloud nine sometimes and other time, I felt like complete and utter crap. There would be time when Jimin would completely ignore me, air all my calls and leave my messages on delivered. In those times, I wished I could fly to him and ask what's up? I did do that a few times and those were the times I had the biggest fights with him. I thought we would break up whenever we fought like that, but he would always apologise and his sweet words and voice would lull me back into a sense of security I never had.

Jimin was busy prepare for stuff before he enlist, recording 2 albums and the content to go with it kept him busy. As a kind gesture, I sent him coffee trucks and on one of his music video shoots, I even went to see him. But he didn't look happy to see me. He dragged me into his dressing room, "How can you be so careless?" he snarked. "I wasn't. I'm here as a friend to see you" I mumbled. "Friend? ha, every one knows a girl and a guy can't be friends. Especially if you pull the shit you just did" he almost shouted. "I'm sorry. I thought you would be tired and wanted to cheer you up" I muttered. "Y/N, Jagiya, I'm tired of how you behave sometimes. Grow up, you know how the Korean industry is, why do you want me to fail?" Jimin asked. "I don't" I said as tears started to fall. "Don't start this now, I didn't say anything and you're crying" Jimin sighed exasperated running a hand through his perfectly styled hair. "Look what you made me do, I have to have my hair done again" Jimin huffed. "I'm sorry. I'll do better" I begged. "You can't. If you had to you would've by now" Jimin chuckled. "I thought you'd mature by now but I was wrong. You're too stupid. What if we get caught? Then what?" he asked. "You can just tell them we're dating" I croaked out swallowing the lump in my throat. "I don't think you get it. In the west, people date and whatever, it's not like that here. I have a reputation to withhold." he sighed. "Am I not good enough?" I cried out. "No, you are too immature for me" Jimin said.

"We're done. I can't deal with a dating scandal right now" he said calling his hair dresser. I was stood there shocked while Jimin got ready for the next shot. I had tears streaming down my cheeks, my eyes were red as I rubbed them trying to stop crying. "You are an asshole, Park Jimin. I hope you rot in misery of your own making" screamed leaving his dressing room

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by francocolapinto and 1,368,080 others

y/n.y/l/n Cheering my mate to healing myself

user7 What happened???🥺🥺 user8 everyone loves mate❤️❤️ user9 I hope you're doing well🥹😭❤️ user10 she looks so much better lately🫢🫢 francocolapinto come back, I have more mate Liked by Author user11 okay who is this franco dude and why did she like his comment??👀

francocolapinto

Liked by y/n.y/l/n and 587,982 others

francocolapinto What an unforgettable day!! I can't explain how much I enjoyed my first race in F1. Great pace and we work very well with the team. Also had the honour of celebrating it with my most special person❤️❤️

y/n.y/l/n congratulations!! So proud of you😭😭 user12 Y/N dating Franco wasn't on my 2024 bingo card🫣🫣 user13 user12 neither was Franco debuting in F1🥹😭 user14 Power couple😭❤️ user15 so cute!! They are just the cutessssttt❤️❤️❤️

francocolapinto

Liked by y/n.y/l/n and 811,297 others

francocolapinto mix de un finde muy feliz💫 mix of a very happy weekend

y/n.y/l/n Can't wait to watch you win a race soon!!😭 francocolapinto y/n.y/l/n my lucky charm🍀 user16 miss rabbit has fainted😭 user17 The Lewis and Y/N and Lewis and Franco interaction was everything!!🥹❤️❤️ user18 my fav couple everrr❤️❤️ user19 the second picture 😂😂 user20 I hope Y/N comes to all the races👀

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by francocolapinto, 1,297,280 others

y/n.y/l/n my boyfriend scored points in his second f1 race!!! Can't explain how proud I am😭😏

francocolapinto can you stop crying now? y/n.y/l/n francocolapinto never, I'm just so happy for you🥹🥹 user21 she is literally glowing!!!😍😍 user22 they are so in love it's sickening❤️❤️ user23 Franco is a gentleman thru and thru❤️ user24 I'm sure Franco has baby fever from the third picture😌😌 francocolapinto user24 yes I do👀 user24 francocolapinto OMMGGGG!!!😭 user25 she said, this my man, no more flirting with him🤤😍

[georgeclarkesgf]

forgetful | george clarke

the minute george stepped into the flat, he knew something was off.

"y/n? you here?" walking further into the flat, he found y/n in the kitchen making herself a cup of tea, "hey, sorry i'm back so late. we missed t-"

"don't. i can't believe you. all i asked was that you not plan to film today and i wake up to a message telling me you've gone to film a video for arthur. do you even know why i asked you to stay home today?"

he was trying to remember, really he was. but his mind was blank and the guilt began to seep in, only just noticing the tears that left stains on her cheeks.

"no. of course you don't. my parents are in town george. i planned a nice lunch, maybe go on a walk, come back to the flat for a few drinks, but all that went to shit because you left to film a stupid video and then ignored my messages all day. you know how important it is to me that you get along with my parents so having to cancel on them last minute because you weren't even here was not something i wanted to have to do." the tears in her eyes were threatening to fall again, hating how needy and pathetic she sounded.

"we can sti-" george tried, again quickly being shut down.

"no george, i'm mad at you. you don't get to say it'll be alright and that we can still do something. we're not playing happy families. you've hurt me. when we sort this out, then we organise something else."

now the guilt was in full swing and he immediately started to think of ways he could make it up to her, knowing it would take a lot of grovelling to get back onto her good side.

"i'm going to bed, i love you." a soft kiss being placed on his lips.

"i love you too." slight relief evident on his face, knowing she'll never not say 'i love you', even during an argument.

she rounded the kitchen island, starting to make her way to his room and get ready for bed. george watched as she closed the door, still stood in the kitchen, contemplating whether to follow her or give her some space.

he decided on the latter.

--------

it was nearing midnight when george decided he needed some sleep, and the dip in the bed as he got comfortable was enough to wake y/n, a groan leaving her lips.

"sorry. i didn't mean to wake you," she let out an agitated hum of acknowledgement and rolled over, curling into george's side, unable to resist the heat his body always provided, "still mad at me?"

"yep." she responded, accentuating the 'p'.

"okay. can we talk about it?"

"i've said my peace. you go."

"i really am sorry sweetheart, i feel awful," her nails were running along the lines and dips of his stomach, a habit he'd grown accustomed to over the several months they'd been together, "the video was planned ages ago and i didn't even realise the dates clashed. when you reminded me of 'that thing' that was happening today i thought you meant filming. i promise to make it up to you. and your parents. please say they don't hate me."

george hoped it was enough, not that he wouldn't do anything she asked to get her to forgive him, but he couldn't stand the thought of her staying mad at him.

in y/n's head, he was forgiven. during her time alone, she realised she didn't even give him a chance to explain before locking herself in his room for the rest of the night.

"i'm sorry too," george was slightly taken aback by this, unsure what she was apologising for, "i shouldn't have stormed off like that. not even letting you speak before i disappeared all night. and my parents don't hate you. we can do dinner tomorrow if that's okay with you?"

"that's more than okay. i have my whole day free to spend with you and them. we can do whatever you guys want. i love you."

"i love you. so much. even if you are forgetful."

and george stuck to his promise. safe to say y/n's parents like george more than her.

a/n have this as an 'i'm sorry i haven't posted in a while present' <3

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Love Game 1

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Your fiance suggests incorporating roleplay in the bedroom to keep the spark alive, but playing pretend turns out to be all too real.

Characters: Andy Barber, Lloyd Hansen

Note: I did this because I could.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

'You ready?' 

A tingle accompanies the text. Your stomach tosses and turns at the thought. You think you're ready. As ready as you can be. It's all so new to you. 

You hover your finger over the automated reply suggested by the OS. You tap on 'yes', too shaky to type it yourself. You're not scared, just nervous. 

When Andy first brought up the idea, you laughed. It was so absurd. Silly really. 

You remember how the look he gave you was like hands on your throat. The hurt with an edge of agitation strangled away your laughter. You apologised and asked him if you heard him right. Then he explained and it made sense. Kind of. 

'If we're going to get married, we need to keep the flame alive,' your fiance said as you stirred the contents of a pan with a spatula. 'Trust me, I know. A dead bedroom can kill everything else.' 

You frown at the memory. You hate when he mentions his first wife. He's engaged to you now. You're not her. Besides, things are pretty good. That's why you laughed. There was nothing bland to spice up. At least, you hadn't thought so. 

'You know the plan?' He texts. Always thorough, if not persistent. 

'I think' you type as you squeeze your phone tighter then think better of the reply. You backspace. Remember the plan. 'Yes, sir.' 

You blow out between your lip and put the phone on the counter. You look in the mirror and pick up the bottle of moisturizer, smearing it over your face. Half the day you've spent prepping yourself. Everything has to be perfect. Andy is always certain of that. 

You snap the cap shut and peruse the rest of the basket. He thought of everything. New soaps, wax, perfume, and all sorts of goodies. You didn't need it all but he insisted. 

Everything about Andy Barber is pristine and tidy. His house not least of his carefully curated existence. So it is that you often feel as if you don't quite fit it, even when he tells you the opposite. 

Your phone vibes and you look down at the screen as the notification flashes, 'good girl.' 

Your lashes bat and you giggle thinly. You've never done anything like this. You struggle to get a precise grip on the tweezers and have to still your hand with the other. This is wild! 

You rub your thighs together and strike hotter the flame of your anticipation. As much as the whole thing has you uncertain, it has you alight. You steady yourself and lean into the mirror, just a few stray hairs. It shouldn't matter, it'll be dark, right? 

Your phone goes again. You pull back and glance down. You trade the tweezers for the cell and press your lips together. 

'Did you find your surprise?' 

You look up and search your expression. Surprise? You lower your brow and peer around the bathroom. There's more? 

'Bedroom' his next message comes bluntly. 

You chew your lip and leave the mirror behind. You go down to the main bedroom and ease through the door. The room still smells of his cologne. The whole place is drenched in him, meanwhile most people wouldn't guess at a glance that you lived there too. 

You see it on the bed. White silk and lace. The lingerie is sheer enough that you may as well forego it. You near and touch the scalloped hem. You know it must be expensive, funny how so little fabric can be worth so much. 

You step back and take a picture. You send it to Andy and wait, your thumb between your teeth. He replies. 

'Put it on.' 

His blunt orders add to the thrum coursing through you already. It seems he's already in character. You need to get yourself together and do your part. 

'Yes, sir.' 

You set the phone on the corner of the mattress and trade your bathroom for the lingerie. The thong, while high-waisted has you on full display. Not ass, no crotch, just lace straps that trim your thighs and bottom. The top is an open teddy with cups that do nothing to censor your pert nipples. Just wearing it sends a thrill through you. 

You take the phone and return to the bathroom. You use the full-length mirror to frame your reflection with the lens. You snap a few pics and sift through for the best one. You hesitate before you tap the little arrow. You're a mess of paranoia and lust; you shouldn't send photos like this and yet you can't help yourself. 

You wait for his reply. Wait and wait and wait. You have to stop yourself from staring at the phone, knowing that your hyperfocus will only slow time. You cross to the counter and place the phone near the edge. 

Your attention is drawn to the sheer fabric acrosd your chest. You can't suppress the moan that leaks from you. You can feel how excited you already are but your eagerness might just get in the way of the whole thing. 

You sigh and the buzz draws you back from your anxiety. You read the message, almost disappointed. 

'Midnight.' 

That's it. That's all he has to say. Was the pic not good enough? Is this part of the roleplay? You don't know. 

As ever, Andy has you guessing at what he really wants. Hopefully this time, you get it right. 

💕

10:47pm. You’re wired. You’re trying to settle down. You have freshly laundered bedding and a glass of wine; all the perfect ingredients to lull you to sleep. That’s all you need to do. Fall asleep. 

Yet knowing what’s coming won’t let your mind stop. Ugh, your heart is racing again. You need to finish the wine. You push yourself up and have another gulp. You lay in the glow of your phone, a Get Ready With Me playing on low volume. Usually this all works. 

Not tonight. You’re too buzzy. Too frazzled. Too eager! 

You empty the glass and lay back down. You were generous, filling the wide body of the glass to the halfway point. At least two regular glasses worth.  

Your head meets the pillow and you start to feel it. The acidic burn spreads through your veins and you sink into the soft sheets. You turn your head to watch the small screen of your phone, vision slowly hazing as the contoured woman applies her lip liner expertly. 

Your eyelids cling and start to itch. Your heady is swishy, your tummy too, and your limbs weaken. It’s working. You try not to think too much about it, not wanting to counteract the alcohol with your self-awareness. 

You roll onto your side and drift into a half-conscious daze. Your brain swirls and your blood burns hot. Your breathing slows and piques only when your rouse, glancing at your phone as a new video plays. The time stamps into your vision; 11:25. 

You curl your shoulders inward, more tired than anxious now, and slip back into your tipsy stupour. The screen is just a glow on the other side of your eyelids and the audio a scratch in your ears. It fades beneath the even ebb and flow of your quiet snores. 

As the light fades out and the sound dwindles to nothing but the still of night, you wake again. Your eyes open to the darkness. You’re alone. Confused. 

You feel around on the bed for your phone. It must have timed out or the battery died. You don’t find it. Instead, your wrist is trapped in a strong grip and dragged away from the duvet. You gasp and remember what’s going on. It’s starting. He’s there. 

“Ah, ah,” comes the grizzled tut as your other arm is seized and your hands are brought together above your head. 

Andy’s shadowy figure straddles you, pinning you to the mattress as you squirm. You let out a squeak and he hushes you. You still and arch your back, trying to push your chest up. 

“Please, who are you?” You whine, doing your best to play into the scenario. “Please, my husband will be home soon--” 

He shushes you again, holding your wrists together as he leans back to reach behind him. You can hardly see through the dark and your foggy tipsiness. The curtains have been drawn, obscuring the room to fuzzy lines and pulsing shadows. 

He hooks something around your arm; a leather cuff, then secures your other wrist. He keeps your arms up and reaches behind the mattress. He attaches the wring between the cuffs to some unseen hook. Where did that come from? 

You writhe as he stares down at you. You squint back at him, trying to see through the dim. Something feels off. He’s so quiet and forceful. It must be part of the roleplay but it just doesn’t feel like him. He feels like a stranger. 

He backs off of you, peeling back the duvet to drop it on the floor. He prowls along the foot of the bed and you kick your feet, whimpering as you strain against the cuffs. You keep forgetting it’s a game. You have to play your part too. 

“Please, don’t hurt me,” you beg. 

There’s no answer. Andy continues to pace, back and forth, back and forth. He's really transformed. Where he would usually have his hands on his hips, he has them folded behind him, shoulders squared, his steps lighter. 

He stops and lets out a willowy rasp. He unzips his jacket, slipping off the sleeves slowly, deliberately. You lift your head as you try to see him clearer. Did he change? He must have dressed up too. 

Then he pulls his shirt over his head and huffs out again, a growl catching in his throat. He drops the shirt with his jacket and the duvet. Andy never leaves a garment outside the closet or hamper but this isn’t Andy, remember? This is an intruder! And you’re the helpless housewife. 

You nearly moan at the thought. Something about it is so hot even if it makes you a bit squidgy too. You tug again on your wrists as you hear his zipper slice through the din. 

“Please--” you beg. 

He kicks the footboard and the loud bang silences you. You can’t help the pathetic noise that trickles from your tongue and you swallow. He’s doing good. It feels so real. 

He continues to undress. Your heartbeat picks up as you wait for him to really start. He bends to pick something up then climbs over the footboard onto the bed. For a moment, you wince. His silhouette is slimmer. Or seems so. The difference is so minuscule it might be your wine-laced brain playing tricks. 

He catches your kicking feet and pushes your legs wide. He trails his hands up them, a piece of fabric tickling beneath his left palm, and firmly hooks them around him as he moves between them. He stops at your pelvis, his rigid length hovering over you. He stretches the black cloth across your eyes, blotting out what little sight you have. He knots the band behind your head and you gasp. 

He traces along your cheeks and your jawline, as if he can see you through the dark, as if he’s learning you by touch. His fingertips dance down your throat and across your shoulders. You feel fragile as he toys with the strap of the lingerie and feels along the flimsy cups, circling his thumbs around your nipples as they pebble beneath the sheer silk. 

He gropes you and growls. The noise is guttural and raw. It flutters into your core and has you twitching. He pushes his knees against your cunt, moving so the friction flurries in your clit. You babble and raise your chest, hungry for his touch. 

He flicks your nipples and his hands crawl onward, down your torso, doting on the soft flesh of your stomach, and framing your hips as he draws back on his knees. He snarls and bends over you, bowing as he grips you tightly. His nails dig into your skin and you whine as you feel his hot breath against your folds. 

He nuzzles along the edges of the panties, growling as he does, squeezing your harder, then at once, buries his nose in your cunt. He wiggles his head and drags the tip of his nose up over your clit and swipes his tongue up to further set you aflame. You moan and curve your back, planting your heels as you urge him on. 

He delves into you, lapping and licking, suckling and swirling. His arm reaches up and he kneads your chest, blindly pulling the lingerie under one tis. He pinches as you cry out and he rolls your clit between his teeth. You puff out shallow breaths, swept up in the sensations. 

This is so different. Unlike he’s ever been before. He’s almost feral in how he touches you, how he feels you, how it seems he wants to consume you. There’s something else different, something strange you can’t place.  

Did he shave? You can’t tell, It must be the wine. His cheeks feel bare against your thighs and yet you swear you feel that scratchy tickle against your cunt. You don’t think about it; it’s all too much to focus. 

You squeal as you cum, spasming into his face as he drinks up your orgasm. You’re heaving and hollow as he doesn’t let up. He laps at you until you’re begging him to stop. Until you’re quaking, nearly sobbing in overwrought pleasure. Until you have a second, a third, and a fourth. 

Your slickness smears over his face and across your thighs. As he parts, his breath is humid, and you can smell the sweet scent of your release. You shiver as he raises himself up and the bed jostles. He snarls and slaps your thighs, squeezing until you whimper. 

He shifts and slides a hand under your leg. He flips you onto your stomach so your arms twist and your face is buried in the pillow. You pant into the linen as he smacks your ass with both hands and growls as he fondles you. You murmur as his touch sends tendrils down your legs and up your back. 

He grips your hips once more and raises your ass. Oh my god. It’s only a few times you’ve done it like this, often Andy prefers you on your back. He says he likes to see you.  

He pulls you back against him, his length resting between your cheeks as he bends over you. He inhales the scent of your hair and snarls against your crown. He reaches down to feel between your legs, spreading your swollen cunt as he angles his hips. 

His tip slips down and he uses his fingertips to guide it to your entrance. You’re so wet he slips right in. He sounds just as surprised as he gasps. He sinks into your limit and you whine. He retracts his arm, hooking it around your neck, and thrusts. 

You squeal as he buries himself even deeper. He does it again; harder. It hurts. You croak and press your chin down into his arm. You feel a ripple of fear. His chest feels... bare. Andy has that trim of fur that you like to play with. Maybe he got rid of it? For the roleplay? 

He snaps his hips again, staying deep before slowly rearing back. He pauses, then bucks again. The impact of his pelvis on your ass is painful and he’s hitting your cervix. 

“Ow, Andy--” 

“Quiet,” he grits in a deep sneer and brings his other hand up to smother your mouth. 

He leans his weight on you, your neck and shoulders aching from the angle of your spine. He dips into you again, again, again. Each pause between grows shorter as he tilts into a full rut. The entire bed shakes with his motion. 

You squeeze your eyes shut and curl your fingers into your palms, the cuffs slowing your circulation. You huff into his hand as he continues his rampant fucking, skin slapping, bones aching. Harder, deeper, faster, until you’re delirious. 

“What’s your husband going to think when he comes home to his wife being fucked like a slut?” He rasps and nibbles your ear, “huh? How’s he gonna compare to this, baby? Your husband can’t fuck like me can he?”  

He taunts and you cringe. You don’t like it anymore. It’s not fun. You don’t want him to be this man. To be this rough and rude. You want him to be Andy. You try to say his name again but only taste the salt of his palm. 

“Keep your mouth shut, slut,” he sinks into his limit and stays there, his voice echoing in your head. His tone is just... off. “I’m not done with you yet.” 

[proshippers-against-censorship]

Long ask incoming so i really apologise for that lol.

in my honest opinion yaelokre is going about this incredibly wrong. but the way people have been talking about not only their characters (to be clear im not saying this because of "blah blah they're children" fake morality stuff or whatever lmao im a proshipper myself—but one of the main characters is quite literally meant to represent/be keath themself) but about them themself (sending them rape threats, threatening to draw them having sex with their characters?? I've seen a lot on the internet these past couple days, especially in proship spaces, which is so upsetting to me because I had so much more faith in our community 😭)... All this is incredibly disgusting to watch. and disheartening.

Are they going about this incredibly irresponsibly? Yes! Is it naive for them to expect that no rule 34 is created whatsoever? Yeah, probably! But they did explicitly say they dont want the characters directly representing their own childhood (including one who's basically their own persona) sexualised, much less have it sent directly to them (which it was—that's how we even got to this point, anyway) and going ahead and mocking this boundary directly, and then encouraging people to do it out of spite feels... off to me. dunno. (To be clear i think, once again, their actions are incredibly dumb and irresponsible. They're not justified in doing any of that and im not trying to say they are lol.)

(And, while we're here, there's a difference between gigantic heavily funded capitalist projects like disney, and Some Guy working on one deeply personal thing all by themself for free. Do whatever you want with like. Thousand dollar franchises with no specific human faces behind them, but it feels so weird to tear into someone's passion project theyre making out of love for free. Idk where else in my message this point fits so I'm leaving it here.)

I can't help but be reminded of antis tearing into my own work to "fix" it simply because i was a proshipper. On paper people can do whatever they want with fiction, can't they? Of course—but taking a story i made to cope with my trauma and spitefully twisting it to their own wants for no reason other than because I was a proshipper is still harrassment, still done with malice, and—proship/anti stuff removed—an objectively fucked up and mean fucking thing to do. Artists making shit for free do not owe you anything and that includes not owing you their comfortability with people interacting with their personal projects they are sharing with others (for free!! When they don't have to!!!) in certain ways. The same way they also don't owe you being comfortable with unprompted criticism and whatever else.

The "fiction is fiction" argument doesn't hold up when it starts to hurt real people. They aren't a bad person simply for not wanting their personal project sexualised (which—you could argue "that's not the problem, the problem is how theyre going about handling it it," which i agree with; but there are several posts on this very blog and countless others mocking them entirely for simply wanting their work not sexualised, and several posts encouraging others to make sexual content of their characters out of spite. Im not saying it's sexual harrassment but god it does start to feel like it's somewhere in that realm.) This isn't the first time anything like this has happened in their community, ive been here since the beginning, and in the beginning they were so unbelievably calm and polite about their boundaries and then people started directly dming them nsfw and things spiraled and here we are.

I've used the pottery analogy to explain this before—imagine someone puts a ceramic sculpture down on a table. It belongs to them, and they're very clearly proud of it. You could push it off the table and break it if it makes you happy, you won't even face any real consequences if you do. They'll just be really upset, rightfully so—it's their thing that they physically made. Maybe they even made it as a coping mechanism, only they know for sure. And they ask you to handle it gently if you decide pick it up. There's a billion things you theoretically could do, having now been made aware of this clear boundary, but only two are right—either handling it gently, or simply not picking it up in the first place.

You're a shitty person if you push it off the table. Using excuses like "there are lots of people in this room, someone was going to decide to break it eventually" doesn't suddenly absolve you morally because you are a sentient being, not a mindless robot slaving to statistics. Maybe statistically it was going to get broken eventually, it still doesn't make it right because you chose to break it yourself, directly going against what they asked you to do when handling their property, simply because it made you happy. I know full well you would not purposely damage or otherwise ignore clear boundaries or guidelines when it comes to someone's physical shit in real life. The concept of having boundaries about your own things that you made and own is not new and having to follow others' boundaries is not you being oppressed it's just being a decent human being.

Fictional characters' feelings don't matter more than real peoples'. But your own real person feelings of Mild Disappointment at not being to make porn for something you (evidently) don't even like that much ALSO don't matter more than the creator's massive upset and discomfort at direct representations of them (real person!!!) being sexualised.

TL;DR: yeah it's stupid of them to try to Anne Rice this whole situation. And yes they deserve to be called out for it and face the consequences for their actions. But let's... not treat them like it's so bafflingly unreasonable and evil of them for simply not wanting people to sexualise characters who are meant to be a direct representation of them (real person!!!!) as a child and let's EXTRA not break their boundaries even further. Their actions are stupid, yes. But their desires are like. A perfectly normal thing to want, if a little naive. harrassment is still harrassment. Being spiteful and vicious isn't suddenly okay when you're on the "right side" with the Right Opinions doing it. Being anti-harrassment doesn't only apply to people you like.

This ask isn't meant to come off as hostile or mean or anything so I sincerely apologise if it does. Wishing you the best. I also apologise if anything in this ask reads wrong it's late at night and im recovering from a concussion lol.

Fair enough.

I'm team 'break rules, not boundaries'.

By all means, show their Anne Rice approach is stupid by creating nsfw and properly tagging it and posting it to proper spaces. Fill R34 with that. Create nsfw fanworks on AO3 with proper tags. Go ham. But they clearly don't want to see it, so don't send it to them.

You wouldn't send porn of characters to any other creator without them asking. And you shouldn't be sending rape threats either. That's fucked up.

There's a difference between acting out of spite and acting out of malice, and I won't dispute the fact that some people are taking things quite far and doing the latter.

You can say a rule is dumb without taking steps to directly harm.

[swords-of-a-soilder]

I've sleep on it here's my beef

If you wanna log in to participate in a event that fine, I get for some CC's purgatory 2 isn't lore (I mean it clearly is, but some players are choosing not to involve it in their lore.) But when you've made the discussion not to take part in the lore you can't ask about it on screen.

I literally got confused when someone told me bad had a reason and to check there lastest reblog, thinking the book gave them the reason and apologising, this fully left me thinking that the residents where told to return home until I was discussing with someone else and realized I fully misread that (I need to wear my glasses more TBh)

But this play apart of the problem because what I except was a lore reason and I went looking for it, just to find out later there is no lore reason bad just calls himself vactionbadboy halo when he wants to log in.

Look I get playing purgatory for fun, I get wanting to log in to see your friends, Tubbo did it, and Pac did it; but the difference with them being they made up a reason to be there (the boat didn't leave) is a completely valid reason.

I can see them going home and then later being drag back to the boat by the incompetent egg Island workers, but jumping back and forth to the island in the middle of purgatory is problematic.

If you don't want to take part in the lore then don't, don't ask questions about what's happening lore wise (on stream he can always inquire in dms ) , don't do things on the Island that messes with other people's lore or breaks the immersion make it easy for the actual people who care about the lore; Ie: fan fiction writers, artists, role players (I am all these things) to pretend you're not there!

This sounds dumb but I genuinely, when lore is happening take note of every little the to go "how can I explain this in lore, how could I enhance this in lore" to help with my fan art or fan works.

Genuinely I have a list of game mechanics,(chat, tabs list, death messages) and have written ways to explain them in lore, so you can imagine my annoyance when someone who isn't supposed to be involved ask questions fresh of a lore event.

I think the confusion to add to it is that Phil has been trying to do more improv on the spot right now rp; like leaving cuucurhoo the notice of the eye guy and keeping his webcam on until a big event ( and I love him for that, genuinely I love lore so much because it feeds art and fan fiction)

But I feel like im being taken a fool when someone who isn't technically supposed to be there asks questions about something they're not supposed to be awear of and even bounces of it like they're in lore "yeah it looks like we're going to war with you guys." we who? You're supposed to be Vacation halo, you aren't in purgatory right, if so how did you get home?!

Get what I'm saying? It sucks because everyone else so far seemed to-do A decent job of staying out of lore if they want to visit some committing to not coming back to the island at all (cough* bolas *cough ) .

If you don't wanna take part in the lore don't complicate the already existing lore, it annoynes me greatly.

I don't mind the attenting events so much, it's the fail rping of discussing something you shouldn't know not long after it happened. (Metagaming)

[cilil]

Day 5 ~ Love & Creation

𓂃🖋 Characters/pairings: Gothmog x Eönwë 𓂃🖋 Synopsis: Eönwë has been experiencing strange feelings for his enemy out of all people and decides to write him a letter. 𓂃🖋 Warnings: / 𓂃🖋 Oneshot (~1k) | AO3

Gothmog, 

admittedly I do not know why I am choosing to write this letter. Perhaps it is a mere flight of fancy that you will rightfully ridicule me for, or it may not even reach Angband, as a land of fire and ice like the one your lord rules over is rather perilous for ink and paper. Either way, I apologise in advance if this letter causes you any trouble or distress, but I have nobody to turn to, and you are the only one I may in good conscience speak to regarding this matter. 

I enjoyed our recent encounters. It may not have seemed that way, I know, but I did. I also realise we were both merely following orders from our lords, and the fact that we had conversations beyond that could be regarded as inappropriate by our respective sides already. 

Nevertheless, for all the posturing and bickering, I found myself feeling strangely... understood? While my peers around me know me as a capable warrior, few ever ponder the implications of it, accepting my efforts to be gentle in nature regardless, whereas you see violent acts, no matter who commits them, as something necessary, something to be viewed with pragmatism. In my opinion a little too nonchalant, if I may add, but I will not deny that your stance was strangely refreshing. 

I feel that I could confess to you, my enemy out of all people, the worst I have done and the worst I have thought about doing and you would not even flinch. You would not be afraid of me. You would not think less of me. At worst you would accuse me of hypocrisy; though I assure you that I am trying my best, just as I suppose you do, evidenced by your rather impressive record of foul deeds. 

I will also admit that merely writing these lines makes me wish to speak to you in person, so I could indeed confess all these things to someone who will simply accept that part of my nature. Perhaps you are even laughing as you read this, wondering how a Maia born for war could have such strange feelings about their very nature. 

But I know you do understand. I know I never saw you among the Maiar of Almaren, and you revealed to me that you and your kin were never welcome among us and became the first to follow your lord. You know how it is when parts of your being are dangerous and unacceptable to others. 

I wonder if you ever wished you could change, though I am not so naive as to believe that you would entertain such a conversation through letters, if the very premise of this one has not already invoked your ire or disdain. And perhaps embracing the worst of Ainurin nature has at least freed you from your doubts, which is something I may, willingly or not, condemn, but am able to acknowledge. 

I know you cannot, will not and are most likely unwilling to help me, and I do not expect you to. In fact, I would already be grateful and honoured if you read this far. However, what I will ask of you is that we meet again. I cannot explain the desire to be in your company, as strange as it may sound, though hopefully you will find it flattering at least. 

If you are willing to see me again, of our own accord and without orders to constrain us this time, you can entrust a message to the bird I sent you, or come to the northern wastes near Helcaraxë at the next full moon, if correspondence by letter is not agreeable to you. I shall be watching and waiting, and you have my word that I have no intention to attempt to deceive you. As long as you extend the same courtesy to me, there will be no need for weapons and bloodshed; for I must warn you, I shall not let myself be trapped or captured easily. 

I hope to see you soon. Eönwë

Gothmog's brow furrowed. It was such a silly idea, to write what amounted to a strange sort of confession and send it to a Balrog, the kind of Maia that was notoriously on fire, but also sweet in a way. 

He had, that much he had to admit, conversed with Eönwë in a friendlier manner than he usually would, finding himself irrevocably taken with his effortless beauty and precious mannerisms, from the pompous posturing to the furious blushing to the various bird-like behaviours he displayed. 

It was a pity, Gothmog had often thought, that such a creature was both too pure and innocent and too determined to follow his master's morals, seemingly forever out of his reach, while also far too strong and capable to simply be claimed and possessed by someone like him. Even if he had decided to resort to violence to get what he wanted, he knew Eönwë would have likely defeated him — in a fair fight at least — yet it only made him more endearing and desirable to him.

And now Gothmog had been granted a rare blessing, an improbable streak of good fortune: His favourite enemy wanted to talk to him and see him. 

It seemed too good to be true, to the point where he should perhaps wonder if he was being lured into a trap after all, but he doubted it — the letter felt too honest in its chaotic, almost desperate pouring out of Eönwë's heart, addressed to someone who, as far as the poor herald was aware, might not care to hear it. Also the good thing about being an enemy of the forces of light was that they were far less prone to lies and deception, with Manwë and his flock of avian servants being the worst offenders when it came to candour. 

Gothmog proceeded to hide the letter in a pile of rocks immediately and curled up next to it. He was going to sleep on this — quite literally — and once the next full moon rose, he would indeed go to meet Eönwë. Maybe, he wondered as he closed his eyes, the pretty bird would let him pet his wings if he listened to him in return. 

Thanks for reading! ♡

taglist: @angbangbaby @a-world-of-whimsy-5 @blauerregen @bluezenzennie @edensrose @elanna-elrondiel @eunoiaastralwings @i-did-not-mean-to @just-little-human @melkors-big-tits @singleteapot @stormchaser819 @urwendii @wandererindreams

[shortpplfedup]

Chapter 6: The Walk to Forget and Forgive

Gut punch after gut punch this episode as the focus moves squarely onto Jim for really the first time this whole series. Jim's been...not an enigma exactly, but he does keep things close. You get the sense of melancholy and a deep-rooted pain, but don't know exactly where it comes from, until now. Other things happen this episode, but it's mostly about how Jim internalises and responds to events more than the events themselves.

Before we get to Jim though, Li Ming going to see Heart's mom, apologising for sneaking him out, speaking frankly and openly with her about the Heart he knows, asking her to allow him to continue spending time with Heart despite his job with them being over...Jim doesn't quite see it but Li Ming has grown up. He can take responsibility for his actions, and he can ask for the things he wants, and what he wants is not to lose his connection with Heart, and for Heart not to lose the agency and community he's gained. For Jintana to agree, albeit with conditions, you can tell she's processing a lot but trying, finally, to do the right thing. I love that Li Ming didn't tell Heart that his mom allowed him to come over to his house, but instead told him to ask his mom and let her tell him yes herself. That's a little bit of healing that those two needed, and Li Ming saw that. And then Heart gives him his voice in return and...look I have something in my eye. Heart doesn't have to vocalise. Li Ming doesn't require him to, and he's never asked it of him, they can communicate just fine. But the joy Li Ming got from Heart allowing him to hear his voice was just sweet. It was special, something Heart did for him out of love and trust, and Li Ming understands that. And then their little New Year's celebration à deux, them taking their romance from understood to confirmed with that kiss, and their shy reactions afterward...perfection.

The headline this week is Jim finally dealing with the scars of his relationship with Beam, as we discover that Beam died in a tragic accident without them ever resolving Jim's discovery of his cheating. They had a fight about it, Jim dumped him, Beam left vowing to explain later, and then he was gone. And in the ensuing years, Jim's grief and guilt have simply consumed him. He's questioned himself, he's blamed himself, he's buried himself in what if's, and he's never faced up to what happened, not really. Jim is holding so many regrets inside him that Wen coming into his life has churned up. Wen's insistence on pulling Jim out of himself has ultimately been good for him. It's Wen who suggests that he try to meet with Beam's girlfriend, try to get some closure on the questions that have been swirling in him for the past four years. And you get the sense that once he's done that he takes the first deep breath that he has since that moment he identified Beam's body. 'We just fell in love with a selfish man'...Jim NEEDED to hear that. The way he loosens up after that lunch and allows himself to be affectionate with Wen, to hold his hand and embrace him and be playful, it's like he finally has an ounce of hope that maybe he's not cursed after all. He still won't answer Wen's question, as to whether he's part of Jim's family now, but you know the answer in his heart.

Also on the 'Jim clearing things up' tour: Gaipa. Poor sweet Gaipa, who just isn't the one Jim wants, and he finally has to tell him that. You could see from the moment Gaipa starts to talk about his mom and dad's love story that Jim knows where the conversation is going, and he starts steeling himself to let him down as gently as possible. When Gaipa finally just asks the question, Jim doesn't say anything except 'I'm sorry', but Gaipa gets the message. And then he returns the title deed, making it as clear as possible that there's no hope there. And man it's BRUTAL, watching Gaipa try and fail to hold back his tears while Jim sits there in agony that he's had to hurt him like this.

Alan isn't doing so hot. After insisting to Wen that he can separate personal from professional, he tells Jim exactly the opposite as he hands back his loan application and suggests he try another bank, a suggestion which Jim dismisses. And then drunk driving? Getting into an accident? Wen still being his next of kin? Wen feeling responsible and Jim agreeing that he should stay and take care of Alan? On top of stumbling upon Heart and Li Ming kissing? All this just as Jim returns from a moment of catharsis and feeling free, and you see his shoulders get lower and lower as the weight of his life piles back on after the brief respite.

Side Dishes

This ep is set at New Year which means everything since Alan crashed into the story and Li Ming started sneaking Heart out of the house has happened more or less inside a week. What a fucking week, no wonder Jim is stressed as hell.

Poor Gaipa, you just know he heard Wen moved in and thought it was now or never.

The way Jim responds to Wen, even as he tells himself and Wen that they can't be a thing...he's so in love. Holding himself back from stroking Wen's hair and then just giving in and letting himself have that was such a moment.

Jim sir that man is good at doing the dishes, Li Ming said so, why are you doing them?

I understand why Aof did an angle kiss with Heart and Li Ming, but it's still a smidge awkward.

Speaking of the kiss, I'm so glad Jim didn't ruin their moment. No matter what his complicated feelings about Li Ming's sexuality are, he let them have that.

Li Ming's mom Jam shows up next week and YES LET'S SQUARE THIS MOTHERFUCKING CIRCLE I'M READY.

Interesting throwaway (except is anything ever a throwaway in this show?) about Jam and Jim running away from home. We'll probably get some more on that when Jam shows up next week.

Another interesting 'throwaway': Saleng and Jim's conversation about being selfish when you're desperate. That's definitely about to come back around.

[ufo-ikawa]

hi, this is me ari.

you’ll have seen that i deactivated my accounts, both my main and my personal. i ran away from everything as fast as i could which was cowardly, and i don’t expect forgiveness at all, but this is an attempt at exposing everything. please share with everyone who read the fics and/or interacted with me.

in november 2021, i opened up ufo-ikawa. i had originally started with writing my own works, because i just wanted to write and join a fandom i really liked— then it snowballed. i have always felt my own writing was bad, and could never live up to others so i did what any pathetic person would do. i stole works from people who’s writing i admired and wanted to be like. (i also had another blog onigiri-mia which was deactivated due to death threats i was receiving daily regarding old drama, and stolen works were also posted there). instead of gaining inspiration, and reaching out to the writers themselves for any meaninful conversations on how to learn to write, i stole them, rewrote them and claimed them as my own.

and as i did, i slowly started to believe in everything i was saying or doing. i did it so much i felt like i was performing an act whenever i did and convinced myself that it was right. in real life, i am just a person who wanted attention so bad, to be liked so bad, to be part of something that i did one of the worst things just to gain it. i guess in a way, identity theft, and then plagiarism.

which i know is absolutely wrong of me. i have also reached out to the creators separately and said my apologies, except for nine3rds who i have been unable to message. i can’t make them accept any apologies and i take 100% accountability, and it doesn’t lessen any guilt i have now that the truth is out or all the wrongs i did, but i thought that was the first step.

the second step is owning up to it and cutting through all the bullshit lies i’ve told myself. this year, one of my goals was to achieve something good for myself. idk about you, but i truly do believe in karma. i will of course get it no doubt, because of all the bad i’ve put out, but i’m also hoping that by being honest and righting my wrongs that even if i’m at rock bottom right now, i can still start somehow. not relevant but something i just wanted to say.

i just wanted to apologise to everyone who i’ve talked to here personally or formed close friendships with. it’s hard to believe me, but just know that when we were talking about our lives that was all real and not fake. i am still just a person, a shitty one at that, but those irl experiences and thoughts i talked about were real. I’m genuinely so sorry for deceiving you in some way. i will never interact again, i will stay off of this site for good, and i will also never try to write and post anything again, so i hope u get some peace of mind out of that. i’ve tried to apologise as best as i could to the close friends i made on discord— i have also disabled that account to let them see, and will eventually be deleting it. thank you for talking to me and making me laugh and just listening to me, even if i didn’t deserve it.

if you’re angry at me and resent me, i completely understand and will not try to speak further. i’ve tried my best to explain it all above, but i won’t open my asks because i hope this post explains it all enough. you can say anything you’d like under this post if it helps.

i’ve deactivated my account but i know the fics stay there so please delete any reblogs and unlike any fic. i am genuinely sorry for deceiving everybody for selfish reasons (that absolutely do not excuse anything). i have a lot of work to put into myself to try and fix things, but i hope this is a start.

now for the most imporant part, i wanted to link the original writers’ work. they are all incredible, and if you liked what i stole then of course you will like them even better as the original. please give them the love they rightfully deserve but please also respect their rules on who interacts:

AO3 lovelanguages

AO3 softbeoms

AO3 nine3rds

that’s all i have to say. thank you, and please share.

[specialagentlokitty]

Giles x teen!reader - a demigods fate

Part two:

It was the week before the school was supposed to close for Halloween, and you had been forced out of your classes into the library for one to one help with your work.

Except you were interested in that, instead you were flipping the coin between your fingers as Willow tried to explain something to you using a whiteboard.

“(Y/N), come on, this is important.” Willow sighed.

“It’s a waste of time.”

She sat next to you, taking some paper.

“It’s really easy, I’ll show you how to do it step by step.”

You pushed yourself away from the table, making your way up the stairs and you looked down at her from where you were leaning for the railing.

She carried on writing step by step instructions for you and Giles came from his office.

“You know how important it is you pass these make up tests in a few days (Y/N), Willow is trying to help but you much be willing to put some of the work in yourself as well.” He said.

“Like I said, waste of time.”

You turned around and walked to the shelves behind you, browsing the books in boredom for something that may seem even a little interesting.

“Now, my memory may not be what it used to, but if I recall you used to enjoy learning.” A voice called.

Your head stepped up and you rushed to the top of the stairs, looking at the doors.

“Hello (Y/N).”

You blinked a few times.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

“(Y/N) please, we’ve discussed your foul language.” Giles sighed.

Him and Willow looked between you and the man in the wheelchair in front of the main desk of the library.

“Is it so wrong for my to come and see a friend?” The man asked.

“I didn’t even know we were friends Chiron, I thought we were just two people who happen to know each other.”

Chiron hummed a little.

“Am I going to get a proper hello from you or just sarcastic comments, because I didn’t put the effort into coming all this way to not get a hello.”

You began walked down the stairs, and you sat on them, watching as he pushed himself over, stopping his chair just in front of you.

He leant down, arms resting on his legs and he offered you a gentle smile.

“I’m sorry, but we need to talk.” He whispered.

You shook your head, looking up at him.

“No. No I’m done playing that game Chiron.”

“This is urgent.”

“Then you could’ve sent a message like always.”

“I did, with another Demigod who was supposed to come and help you..”

You narrowed your eyes a little and he nodded his head confirming your suspicions.

You ran a hand through your hair, and you stood up, looking at Willow and Giles.

“Get out.”

“This is uh.. my library?” Giles said confused.

“I said get out before I throw you both out.”

Chiron placed a hand on your arm.

“Remember our manners (Y/N).”

He turned his chair around and offered them both a smile.

“I do apologise for (Y/N), as always they have a way of words. My name is Chiron, a family friend, I was wondering if we could have some space in order to talk.” He smiled.

“Yes, yes of course. Willow, why don’t you go back to class, I’ll be just over here.” Giles said, gesturing to his office.

The two left and you walked over to one of the chairs, moving them aside, then you sat on the other looking at the man.

He offered you a smile as he took one of the text books from the table.

“English.” You said.

“You always did struggle with that as well as math, why don’t you let these people help you with it, you know it’s important to get an education.” Chiron said.

You scoffed.

“Yeah, because demigods can get regular jobs like regular people.”

“(Y/N), I know you never asked for this and I’m sorry.”

“You’re right! I didn’t ask for this!”

You stood up, knocking your chair over which got Giles’ attention from his office and he walked to the window to look through the blinds.

You stared at Chiron, clenching your jaw.

“I didn’t want to be this! I don’t want to be this Chiron! I don’t want to be some hero!”

He sighed.

“I know…”

“I.. i wanted to grow up and be a vet, you know, work with animals, make them better.. I.. I want to have a long life… but demigods aren’t exactly the poster children for long and healthy lives are they?”

Chiron looked up at you.

“You can still have a long life, we just need to stop whatever is coming.”

“Then tell me how Chiron, because I’m not a mind reader.”

He gave you an apologetic look.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know anything, if I did I wouldn’t be able to tell you. You know this.”

You picked up your chair and sat back down.

“Then why did you come?”

“Because I heard you were struggling with some work, I heard you were struggling with a lot of things I suppose, and I wanted to come help. You need to stay in this school, it’s where the hellmouth is and you must be here.”

He took the English book, and he handed it over to you, moving to your side.

“Read it for me, it’s alright, I’m here to help.”

You glanced at him and sighed, slowly reading the words on the page the best you could but they kept moving, changing.

You got frustrated and threw the book across the room.

“Hey, hey it’s alright. It’s okay. You just need to take your time, remember?” Chiron asked.

Giles walked out of his office, over to the book you had thrown and he picked it up, looking over at the pair of you.

“Terribly sorry, I heard a commotion and just thought I would come to check that everything was alright.”

Chiron pushed himself over to Giles, taking the book back, he looked over to where you were messing around with the coin again.

Chiron turned back to Giles, listening to the dull thunder that rolled over the building, and you lifted your head to look up before turning to Chiron.

Chiron smiled at Giles.

“Please take care of (Y/N), I know they can be a handful, but they struggle, severe dyslexia, the words move, vanish, change, they can’t focus. They need help.”

You stood up, walking halfway over and Chiron made his way back to you, offering you the warmest smile.

“You’re going to be alright, let them help you. When the time comes they will be your biggest asset.”

“Who?”

There was a loud crack of thunder.

“I’m sorry, I’ve said too much. I need to leave.”

“Chiron who? Who will be my biggest asset?”

“Look in the office, there’s book you may find particularly interesting.”

You furrowed your brows.

“Take care (Y/N), and I will send word if I hear anything more.”

“Chiron!”

He ignored you and left through the door Giles had opened, and you huffed, throwing yourself back down in your chair.

Giles walked over, pulling a chair over and he sat next to you, pushing his glasses up as he set the book down on the table.

“You’re wasting your time.” You said.

He smiled at you.

“I uh.. I don’t think I am, I think this will be time rather well spent.”

Giles took the text book and he handed it to you, turning it around so you could look at the pages.

You watched as the words moved around and you couldn’t focus.

“Just take it one word at a time, don’t rush yourself.”

“I’m trying you asshat…”

He sighed.

“Language.”

You tossed the book behind and he leant down to pick it up, setting it on the table.

“What helps you focus, what helps bring the words to a standstill on the page?”

“Throwing it.”

He chuckled a little, setting the book back on the table.

“How about if I were to read the work out to you, would that make a difference at all? Would you be able to work from that?”

“I guess here yeah, in the test, no.”

Giles thought for a moment, then he turned to face you, offering you a gentle smile.

“Let me worry about that, if I can get permission to help you read through all your tests, can you agree to coming here after school to go through your work?” He asked.

You looked at him in boredom.

“No.”

He sighed.

“(Y/N), Chiron told me how you struggle, I would just like the opportunity to help you, but I can’t if you don’t give me the chance to be able too. I read the work, read the questions, you give the answers, that’s all.”

“What if I don’t have them?”

“Then we work through the question together until you do.”

You looked at him, and you saw something moving down the hallway behind him.

Getting up, you shoved the books aside and you walked around him.

“(Y/N)!” He called.

You ignored him and made your way into the hallway, looking around only to catch a glimpse of a showed of the thing wondering through the hallways.

You ran after it, trying to chase it out into the front of the school.

You felt a tremor through the ground, and you stared out past the school.

You didn’t realise that Buffy had come to stand next to you, and she stared out in the same direction.

You could both sense it, that something big was coming, something big, and scary, and out for blood.

“(Y/N)!”

Giles walked over to you, and he stood behind you and Buffy.

“Buffy? What’s wrong?”

You began to walk down the steps, and she turned back to Giles.

“Somethings coming…” you both whispered.

Giles looked past Buffy and to you.

“You can sense it?” He asked.

He nodded, and he pointed past her to you where you seemed to search for something that he couldn’t see before you ran down the street.

“I don’t believe that you’re the only one, it seems that our new students may know something we don’t.”

Buffy looked to you and nodded her head.

“I know, I’ve caught them lurking in the places I see those monsters. I need to talk to them.”

[wilsons-three-legged-siamese]

Day two of Old man doctor yaoi summer 2024!! Plus, birthday special!!!!!

Prompt: Wedding

Word count: 675

Art form: fanfic

Song: Futile Divides - Sufjan Stevens

A/N: I recommend looking at the song, as it kinda sets the vibe, plus it's so Hilson coded it's insane, so like yeahhh- I also wrote this in the car so if it's shit I apologise. 😔

Quick thing, if anyone wants to post these on ao3, I'd be happy if you message me and give me credit to them- I want other people to see my work honestly, so if anyone wants to, drop me a DM <3

The crowd filtered to the side of the dance floor, all looking eagerly at the two men who made their way to the middle of the people. They looked each other, holding their hands together and soaking in the atmosphere.

"Is your leg okay? It's only two minutes, " Wilson asked, cocking his head slightly while his face softened.

"Yes, yes. I wouldn't miss this for the world, Wilson, " House explained.

Wilson smiled and placed his hands over Housed shoulders, crossing them at the back. House placed his hands on Wilsons waist, trying to lean on him a bit, Wilson let him.

Then the music started to play.

It was slow and sweet as they started to sway side to side. The crowd cheered, all smiling at the couple, some already taking videos and pictures.

"It's been a long, long time since I've memorized your face. "

Wilson placed his forehead to Houses, feeling sparks come off of the man as House smiled. Wilson let a tear roll down one of his cheeks, sniffing as he chuckled a laugh.

"It's been four hours now since I've wandered through your place. "

Chase wiped a few years from his cheeks, as thirteen stood next to him with an arm around his shoulders, crying too. Taught stood with his wife, holding her hand as he faught back tears of his own. Both Park and Masters stood together in their dorky dresses, looking in awe at the couple. Adams was with Foreman, Cameron stood next to them who was sobbing.

"And when I sleep on your couch, I feel very safe, " Wilson whispered, just so House could hear.

House stifled a laugh, pulling Wilson closer.

"And when you bring the blankets I cover up my face."  Wilson looked deeply into Houses eyes.

"I do love you. "

"I do love you. "

They continued to sway to the music, absorbing the crowds sobs and awh's. Wilson kept ahold of House, careful of his leg, and tightening his arms and bringing him ever so closer - if that possible. It was truly a beautiful scene. Wilson gently connected their lips, kissing House slowly, tenderly and chaste. House moved his hands up Wilsons sides and to his jaw, cradling Wilsons face. The crowd cheered at the action, some people crying even more at the domestic scene. Wilson pulled away.

"When you play guitar, I listen to the strings buzz, " Wilson muttered, grinning ear to ear.

House gulped nervously, giving Wilson a wonky smile as he blushed like a schoolgirl. Wilson chuckled, placing his head on Houses chest.

"The metal vibrates underneath your fingers. "

Wilson pulled himself together and looked at his blushing husband, and smiled brightly. House couldn't help himself, he let out a cheerful sob as several tears fall down his cheeks. Wilson took one of his hands and wiped them away with a soft look, appreciating the vulnerability of House.

"When you crotchet I feel mesmerised and proud. "

"We should've changed that line to write files, " House mumbled with a giggle.

"You're right, " Wilson replied.

"And I would say I love you, but saying it out loud, " House sung. "It's hard so I won't say it all. "

"Oh honey, " Wilson cooed, his eyes filling with tears again.

"I love you, " House blurted.

It was like a spotlight was on them, the crowd wasn't there. It was them and them only.

"Are you sure your leg is okay? "

"Yes. Please, stop worrying, it's our night tonight. "

"And I won't stay very long. "

Chase pulled out his phone, finally starting to film, but Rachel Taub had smartly filmed the whole thing - mainly Taubs idea as he shipped them even when he met Wilson after House. Thirteen had been taking photos with her camera, same with Cameron.

"But you are the life I needed all along, " they sang in unison, both crying.

"I think of you as my- "

"LOVER! " They both shouted with a chuckle.

The crowd fell in a fit of cheers and laughter at their joke.

"Although that sounds dumb,

And words are futile devices. "

[throwaway588924578]

What really happened

For clarification, these are mostly allegations but since there seems to be some truth behind them and everyone seems to believe allegations without proof anyway, I thought someone should make a post to show the other side in this situation aren't the innocent angels they make themselves out to be and actually seemed to have purposely kept this going after stating they want to move on.

The main person this post will concern though is tumblr user Swanee (@/newdaybreak) and her friends who target harassed another self shipper for the last year over sharing f/os.

Tw/cw for harassment, mentions of self harm/suicide.

This vent post from Jade Rose on their twt was my introduction to this "drama" and I think it should be read. It explains what happened from their side of the story and how it affected them.

Tl;dr: Swanee allegedly vague posted began harassing Jade alongside her friends after Jade followed her when they shipped with Kanata, unaware that Swanee didn't like sharing. They were not trying to cross Swanee's boundaries, they were genuinely unaware that sharing was an issue for her. Since then Jade lost any friends they had then and suffered from suicidal thoughts and even attempted suicide. I can't find the vague post mentioned or any posts from Jade or Swanee made at this time as they both seemed to have deactivated their origin blogs.

Jade also supposedly received harassing anons they think we're sent by Swanee and her friends. These anons included death threats, encouragement to self harm and end their life, telling them Eden didn't love them and wanted them dead, ableist and transphobic comments. Some examples are down below (picked ones that weren't too bad to share because some are just too much)

They also received the following message (as well as other harassing messages) on their retrospring when they attempted to migrate to twt which they think is from Swanee or one of her friends

Jade suffers from bpd and has said before that things like being spammed with harassment trigger breakdowns and they will have serious suicidal thoughts. Lots of people have apparently mistaken this for bait but Jade said they can't control it and genuinely are thinking those things when it happens which is why they ask people not to harass them.

Though Jade has apologised for everything they've actually done wrong, but people still defend the person who has harassed them and not yet apologised.

Honestly, as an outsider in all this, I think this is very chronically online behaviour and some of those callouts I've seen haven't had much evidence either. People can lie online. Yes, even about racism. In a community like the self ship community, isn't everyone welcome? There are far worse people allowed in the community than Jade, who have actual evidence against them too, yet Jade is the one outed because a popular blog said theyre a bad person?

I've seen their account, they seem like a sweet person who just wants a platform for their ship. They haven't harassed that other shipper and I think it's unfair to continue to out and harass them.

This community is supposed to be a safe space after, so why are we not allowing this one person to be apart of our community and make friends? It's unfair since no actual proof aside from one out of context screenshot and just screenshots of their breakdowns (that were triggered by harassment and Jade even apologized for them) against them. This whole situation could have been avoided if Swanee had blocked Jade or told them that they weren't okay sharing instead of taking the approach she did to the situation.

I may add more to this if I think of anything. I'm tired btw so sorry if some parts didn't make sense.

Rbs are appreciated and my asks are open for questions or discussions. I'm not actually friends or close with Jade Rose however so I may not be able to answer or give clarification for some things.

[time-is-restored]

73 yards thoughts

now that ive had a night to sleep on it, and read everyone's thoughts, im rewatching the episode to see if i can come to a more definite opinion about the episode (though that's perhaps against the spirit of the thing, lol!)

so a few moments that stood out for me that i don't think have already been talked about a lot:

when mrs twist shows up on the mountain, and ruby is giving her messages to pass along to the woman, she wants to say sorry. when mrs twist asks 'what for?' ruby looks genuinely thrown + upset, and eventually says '...i don't know.' since the woman/curse that haunts ruby is functionally an externalisation of ruby's deep seated sense that there is something fundamentally wrong with her, i think this interaction was super poignant. ruby 'knows' that she's done something that she needs to apologise for in the same way that she 'knows' there is something wrong with her that will make people react with fear + anger. there's no proof, no clear flaw or mistake that she can point to, because that's the point. the woman isn't saying anything specific -- there's nothing to say. noticing her (noticing a part of ruby that has a perception filter on it -- that is hard to see until you get close) just means that you see in ruby what ruby sees in herself. she is afraid that people will 'discover' whatever is wrong with her, and she'll lose them forever.

relevant to this is the fact that ruby didn't actually break the circle. if reading the messages is what summoned the woman in universe, then sure, she has culpability for that. but if it was breaking the circle, she had to live with the consequences of someone else's actions, and feeling guilt for something she didn't do. while im less confident with this reading, you could argue this is an allegory for her being given away. ultimately, that decision had nothing to do with her. she was literally a baby lmao. the idea that there's something wrong with her bc of her mother's decision is illogical -- doesn't follow reality, just like magic. she's spending her life trying to make up for a mistake she hasn't made (and, honestly, probably wasn't made. we don't know anything about her birth mother -- its more than likely that she wasn't fit to be a parent to ruby, no matter how human or supernatural the reasons for that were. but the facts of the situation don't matter here, in this liminal space. guilt and fear and shame bleed through the gaps. ruby could arguably be 'the spiteful one' the pub laugh about. she thinks she needs to be punished for something, and so the woman punishes her.)

following along this line, we know that ruby genuinely doesn't know what might have caused the woman to appear. she suggests trespassing, or breaking the circle, and gets the idea that reading the notes might have been wrong from the pub, but she never finds out for sure. unit doesn't know, or at least doesn't have the chance to tell her. the lack of closure ties in really well -- ruby has to carry a trauma that, even as she comes to terms with it, she can never truly explain or understand. even the partial amnesia at the end of the episode can be read as a sort of 'the body remembers what the mind forgets'. some part of her knows something terrible has happened, something that scarred her and left her alone for an immense amount of time (even if that time, in a literal sense, was undone), but she won't be able to put words to it. it seems that self acceptance - literally opening her arms to this *thing* that has haunted her her whole life,

now for some more rambly thoughts/things im still confused about

i genuinely think if not for the single shot of the episode reversing and old ruby now standing with her arms out on the cliff, i would have no problems with the themes of this episode. it was a powerful representation of rejection and fear that genuinely freaked me out (ruby running after her stone-faced mother while crying BROKE me), and i think it was a great character study of ruby. like others have said -- how many people would have stuck it out for that long? how many people would have never resented/blamed the doctor (or anyone, really) for leaving? and how many of THEM would've come to find a sense of companionship with their spectre?. ...however.

i can not wrap my head around the shot where time reverses and old ruby is looking out from the pov of the woman. it completely breaks my brain. i know at a certain point i should just accept that the woman can do whatever the story needs her to do, but there was nothing about time travel up to that point. it was all about physical and psychological boundaries. more than that, there was no indication that ruby was trying to make up for what had gone wrong. she didn't try and fix the circle, she didn't try and communicate with the woman at all beyond her first failed apology. on its own, i like this -- ruby becomes resentful of the woman quite quickly, which tracks as an expression of her poor self esteem. why would she try and get in the good graces of someone she rejects + dislikes? and again, i LIKE that she eventually treats her as a companion. all ruby has is herself, and she can never leave herself. getting to a point where she doesn't want the woman to go away, where she doesn't feel lonely while alone -- it makes sense that that is what heals the riff. i can write all that out in a way that makes sense to me. ruby makes a mistake (or witnesses a mistake) that makes the doctor disappear. she rejects herself, and in this liminal space, the part that she rejects manifests into reality. it haunts her for the rest of her life, even as she begins to wield what she thinks it says about her (that she's unloveable) to her advantage. when she accepts it, and integrates it back into herself, she is able to speak clearly to herself -- what she is thinking makes it across to young!ruby. when ruby thinks about the situation without the influence of self hate, she realises that the problem was the doctor's actions, not her own. she gets the message across, the doctor doesn't disappear, and the cycle never starts. the loop closes.

but. she wasn't one with the woman the whole time! if she was, the doctor would have never stepped on the circle -- the loop couldn't start, and so it wouldn't need to be closed. like, i know that we do a lot of paradoxes in this show and sometimes things are just gonna be Weird. but to me it's like if, in turn left, donna died in an unrelated car crash, then ended up back in time anyway. so why, if ruby has apparently accepted the woman by the time she visits the tardis for the last time, does the show bother with taking us back to the hospital and seeing old!ruby flatline? why doesn't the old woman come to her there, in that moment, so old!ruby is reaching across time but not space? if i squint, i could make an argument for the death. ruby's understanding of herself dies so a new, more accepting one can be born -- and obviously the timeline would fade away in the moment the loop is closed. but that's not what happens. old!ruby chooses hope and accepts herself, THEN goes back to the hospital, dies, then travels back to the past through time AND space (somehow, sure, i'll just accept the woman can do that), then communicates the message, then fades away. what changed between the visit to the tardis and her death? what do those few minutes possibly add other than the 'ive never been alone' line, which could've easily been written into the talk on the cliff? hell, she could've passed away right there on the cliff, if that needed to happen! but no matter how i twist it i can't understand why the old woman looked the same as it did before old!ruby merged with her, behaved + moved the same, and physically manifested when none of the criteria for its appearance had yet been met. im almost certainly overthinking it -- i can map everything else from this episode onto a psychological exploration of ruby and her fear. maybe the episode is saying that the woman was always there (at least to ruby), and old!ruby's self acceptance is what let the message get through??? but fuck i hate that she looks the same!!!! aghghhhghg! what changed! what changed! it looks like nothing changeddddd!!!!! <- deranged. they merged, there should be a sign of that beyond her hands being mirrored with ruby's.

tldr. if i could change anything about the ending of the episode, i'd take it in one of two ways. either have ruby merge with the woman while on the cliff and have ruby say something like 'now, what were you (or i) trying to tell me?' before cutting to the new timeline, or have the woman post merge look like old (or young!) ruby. she couldn't be seen because she was unknowable and (bc of ruby's schema) unloveable, so ruby conjured a generic older woman (possibly drawing from mother issues -- had to be someone at minimum old enough to be her bio mum). if she now looked like something specific, wouldn't that show old!ruby knew that what she feared was all bc she rejected herself? young!ruby could even have a line to go along with 'she looked like she was looking for someone', maybe 'i wanted to talk to her' -- just something small indicating that old!ruby's acceptance of herself was passed down in some small way, even if it certainly hasn't cured ruby of anything.

now for other theme/focus mutterings. i could spin something here about the fact that the doctor says the fairy circle 'is' charms and spells and hopes and dreams. ruby hopes and dreams that she can be accepted, and later, that she can bring the doctor back/undo the moment where it all went wrong. but the doctor also says that they should 'rest in piece'. so they're dead hopes and dreams, aka fears + regrets? so breaking it unleashed both the doctor and her greatest fears - the doctor of complete helplessness + impotence, and ruby of abandonment + rejection. because those fears stay buried in this timeline, ruby + the doctor's hopes (which in many ways are embodied in each other) can continue to live and be 'here', not drowned in the past.

also, the doctor implies the woman is 'resting in piece', out of nowhere, which i think is another indication of both ruby AND the doctor having knowledge from the split timeline. after all, old!ruby did die. so did the timeline where all that happened, i suppose. maybe that's the other angle for the fairy circle - it represents the fragility of a load bearing timeline. the hundreds of dead paradoxes and dead universes that spin off from time being written and unwritten as the doctor (and his companions) fixes whatever he can. let them rest in piece. forget what could've happened. forget what just did happen.

now for my other critique. i think the sexual harassment sub plot was cheap and shitty, and only served to be an incredibly lazy 'kick the puppy' moment to show that the prime minister was Evil™ levels of bad. in the process it showed no respect or care to victims of abuse, and pretty heavily implied that ruby had done nothing in the face of her peer being abused, because 'she had to make sure'. of what? that mad jack was a bad guy? watching him heavily imply he wanted to fire nukes wasn't enough to confirm anything? 'he's a monster' wasn't enough? why? what metric was she using, then? if she was waiting for him to be prime minister, why did she wait an unspecified amount of time AFTER he was elected, where he's clearly still abusing marti, to act? presumably the audience was already on team 'oh this guy sucks' by the nuke interview at the VERY latest, where it was also made clear that the guy was fearmongering about borders and all sorts of right wing bullshit. like, those are just the problems with it off the top of my head -- it fucking sucks, basically.

that all being said, i think ruby convincing herself that she only has 'one chance' works super well into the overall theme of ruby's understanding of the monster + her situation being tied to arbitrary rules she's decided help make the woman make sense. since this terrible thing happened when life was previously going fine, there must be a way to undo it and go back to the love and acceptance she had before. but there is no monster to slay that will trigger the end credits. there's just ordinary, shitty humans, and ruby herself. she can't uncross the boundary of pre-and-post trauma. and as long as she thinks there is something she has to make up for, the world where she is being punished will keep ticking along. i just wish it had been communicated in a different context!!!

side note. does anyone else want to come live with me in a world where 'it never snowed again' means that snow never occured again anywhere in the world. yes its way more likely to think that ruby's referring to instances of spontaneous snow linked to her emotions. but can you IMAGINE hardening your heart so entirely after being rejected by your mother that you change the climate of planet earth?? holy shit!

[forensicated]

Ginathon Episodes: Episode 233

After homophobic text messages, Lance knows he was the target of the bomb. He has no beef with Councillor Jerome Taylor who Adam suspected of planting the bomb when he was thought to be the target. Lance confronts Sheelagh Murphy's son, Connor, whose friends conducted a series of homophobic attacks for which Connor gave them a false alibi. Lance is aware that Connor has been struggling with his sexuality and has been counselling him because Sheelagh is of the opinion that being gay is wrong because of her Catholic religious beliefs. Whilst she's friendly with Lance, hearing her son is gay would be very difficult. Lance had recently changed his number and only certain colleagues, his boyfriend and his family have it. The only other person is Connor. Connor swears he didn't do it but Lance worries he passed his number to one of his friends.

He involves CID but doesn't mention Connor at first. Tony advises him to tell Jack but not Sheelagh. Lance is delayed in telling Jack as he receives a SO13 report at the same time. Sheelagh is furious when Lance tells her what he suspects. However the phone responsible for the texts is found in Connor's room.

Jerome Taylor visits the station to make a formal complaint about Adam accusing him of planting the bomb. You'd think given he sent hate mail to Adam he'd stay quiet and not want to fan the flames to stop people looking into things but I guess fire needs oxygen to burn!

Gina goes to speak to Jonathan to ask him if there's anything that Adam has to worry about. "You're really worried about the Super aren't you?" "If he's in trouble, yes." Jonathan chuckles as she moans about Adam accusing Jerome with a witness present. "It's you who finished it remember!" "Reluctantly! But at least we do have a better working relationship." "Oh absolutely. Professional to the absolute last." Jonathan tells her Jerome has a case for public defamation and aside from disciplinary action he could also make a civil case that would make Adam bankrupt. He suggests that Adam apologise or blame his medication for making him delirious.

Adam refuses to apologise to Jerome after they've had a rather tempestuous relationship over the years. He's furious no one will take him seriously and Gina's words make him realise that she hasn't told Jonathan how she feels. She explains the job got in the way and he tells her to just tell him and not let the job be the scapegoat.

Connor is found fighting with a colleague at work. It seems the colleague is the one who planted the bomb after taking his number from Connor to wind Lance up with homophobic text. Connor swears he never knew he had explosives. The colleague admits planting the bomb, spewing homophobic nonsense. Jonathan tells Gina she needs to MAKE Adam take notice and make that apology sooner rather than later before Jerome takes things further. She says he won't listen and takes Jonathan with her to try make him understand.

At the hospital, Gina and Jonathan explain they've got the real suspect and he's admitted planting the bomb. They tell Adam to think about everything that he has achieved - does he really want to let his pride make him throw it all away? Gina urges him to protect his career, himself and his family and to talk to Jerome.

With Gina and Jonathan present, Adam apologises and tells Jerome he's made a grave error. Jerome delights in telling Adam it's too late - he's already consulted his solicitor. As a public figure he has to protect his reputation and if it means destroying Adam then he's all too happy for it. He says he'll see him in court and walks out. Gina tries to comfort Adam but he tells her that if it does get that far - they both know his career is over.

Gina and Jonathan eventually have to leave and Jonathan tells her he's glad Adam has her in his corner. "What, a nagging old battleaxe?" "No, someone who can make tough decisions for the right reasons." She pauses for a few seconds before telling him it's not true that her job means more to her than Jonathan. Jonathan is confused as he thought when she didn't argue it was exactly what she meant.

Gina: "You mean as much to me as my career and I don't want to lose you. Not for anything." Jonathan: "You mean you can make space for me in that extraordinarily hectic life of yours?" Gina smiles and nods before realising that she's supposed to be giving a talk at a Neighbourhood Watch meeting. Jonathan laughs before Gina just shakes her head. Gina: "Stuff it. I'll send someone else because I might have a hot date tonight...?" Jonathan: "You sound pretty confident..." Gina: "I know what I want. " Jonathan: "Well I hope so, because from what you just said that sounds like the basis for a verbal contract." Gina: "Come on, i've got a very good bottle of single malt at home. Let's negotiate."

[malamai]

Aura had her heart absolutley broken for the first time today.

And it wasn't by a boy, it was by her best friend which absolutley killed me inside because I know how close her and her best friend are, they have been best friends and completely inseparable since they met when they were both two years old. They went to nursery together, they walk to school together, they're both usually together after school and sometimes before school they even meet up to get ready together and even spend most weekends having sleepovers at our house or hers. This is categorically the most worried I have been about Aura experiencing anything because she usually tells me everything but she hasn't said much on the situation at all tonight, like it chokes her, she just can't and I know that feeling well.

What happened was awful. For Christmas Aura had asked for skin care, it's what she loves, she loves feeling fresh so Lee bought her some bubble and I bought her a big beauty bay skin care box, more bubble and some Sol de Janeiro ect... VERY EXPENSIVE but it's just what she wanted and it's what she got and she was absolutely blown away that she got it all. Tonight she came into my room because we have spent the last few night playing through a video game together and she tells me "mam, all my expensive skin care is gone, I thought it would be in my room and maybe fell behind my drawers but it's not." So I say "don't worry, I'll come help you look for it" so I did and I can find anything, it's a legit skill of mine and I just could not, it was very clear it's gone. I ask Aura who has been in her room around the time it's gone missing and she told me some names, I get my phone and the girls have a lot of the same stuff so I just message the parents of the kids that have been in her room and say "hi, could you ask _____ if she has picked up some of Aura's skin care by accident?" And we start having a conversation about if it was possible that one of her friends had stolen it and I was like "look this is the main girl that's been in your room, do you think she could have taken it?" And she was like "no it won't be, she wouldn't do that."

About 15 minutes later there's a knock on the door and it's Aura's best friend with her hands full of skin care and her mam who looked something between embarrassed, fuming and gutted and started apologising and explained that she had stolen it. I swear I just saw Aura's heart just sink. She took the skin care back out of her best friends hands didnt say a word and just went up to my room and just removed herself from the situation and I knew she was heart broken and felt stupid.

When they left I immediately went upstairs and just found her silently crying trying to face away from me and I just turned her around, pulled her into a hug and just started telling her she wasn't stupid for trusting somebody or feeling hurt because of this because she was her best friend in the whole wide world. They've been inseperable for years and this was a huge blow to her trust in others. Even though I am her mother I know that when you are a ten year old child your friends are your whole world, its them over anything or anyone else.

Even after this Aura showed such emotional intelligence and maturity it was actually unbelievable, I asked her if she wanted to talk about it, she said no and I asked her if she had told a friend and tried talking to them she said "I'm only telling ____ because I know she won't tell anyone else what she did and even though she stole my stuff I don't want her to end up with nobody." And I have never been more fucking proud of my child in my life, she blew me away, She could of been spiteful and would have had every right but instead she chose kindness.

[jvstheworld]

The Buffy Re-watch: S1E12 (part 1)

Prophecy Girl

The last episode of season 1. I ended up writing 9 pages (A5 Pages, I don't like writing on A4, A5 is just easier to hold and rest on my lap as I write), so this might be another 3 parter. Here goes:

First thing I noticed was that the sign for the Bronze changed after the last episode still had the fumigation sign on it.

Xander practicing asking Buffy out and using Willow is his practice person. Oh boy.

Buffy is off fighting, and she lands on her back/butt, then she pulls out a stake from the back of her waistband. How did she not get stabbed by it when she fell?

Giles really does put in some serious overtime as a Watcher. The man needs more of a life. But I get the importance of why he's putting in the extra the time.

Earthquake. According to The Master, a possible 5.1. Can someone explain to me how earthquakes are measured? We don't get them here in the UK, except for that one time in 2008? where we had a small one. I slept through it though.

Giles looks like shit, after finding out some very troubling news. As we saw in Episode 10, Giles' biggest fear is losing Buffy so her will try to do anything he can to prevent that from happening. He definitely has a father's love for her by this point.

Okay, here we go, Xander is asking out Buffy. He was direct and to the point, that's good, get's the message across.

THEN HERE IS WHERE HE RUINS!!! Buffy turns him down because she sees him as just a friend only. Her friendship is more important, more valuable than the possibility of starting an ill-fated with him that could ruin their friendship. He likes her ad asking her out was brave, don't have a problem with that. The problem is how he reacts to it. Buffy doesn't feel that same so it wouldn't make sense for her to say yes, that would be leading him on and would be wrong. She also has feelings for Angel and would cause problems there. Turning Xander down was the right thing to do in this situation. However, Xander's snipe 'I guess a guy's gotta be dead undead to make time with you?' was fucking uncalled for and cruel. You can't help who you fall for, but you do not get to punish someone because it's not you. When faced with rejection you accept what the person has said and move on. You don't ever act like an entitled asshole because they said no. And while Xander may have apologised for his little comment after Buffy rightfully calls him out for it, he doesn't mean it. He hates Angel and takes any opportunity to disparage him in front of whoever will listen. He says sorry to placate Buffy, but he doesn't actually regret saying it because he believes what he said. Rejection fucking sucks. Whether it's by friends, partners, jobs or university, it hurts. But it happens. It's a part of life and you need to get used to it, because if you always take it so hard and personally it will eat away at you and leave you bitter and angry at the world. If left like this your mental will be in tatters. Learn to accept rejection and move on. In Xander's case, he can either accept that Buffy's friendship is enough for him, or he can walk away if he can't accept it. To quote Billy Butcher from 'The Boys' (I love this show) 'Don't be a cunt.'

I'm going to leave it there for this part. I will have more to say about Xander in the next part, but it will mostly centre on Buffy. Part 2 tomorrow.

[nataliescatorccio]

i wasnt yelling at you! i noticed a typo in a pretty post and if i had a glaring mistake in something i worked really hard i would want someone to tell me so i could fix it! u and ur followers are mocking me and being mean girls abt this but i was literally only trying to help!!!!!!

theres a very similar edit to yours which had a different caption and i mixed them up, since you had gotten mad at me for that i messaged again to explain about the caption. and then u decided i was yelling at u cause my tone wasnt perfect??? i was explaining what had gotten mixed up!

communicating is really fucking hard for some people, ok? we dont all just breeze through life with no struggles. communicating is hard. i was doing the best that i could and you read a negative intention into everything i said and then made fun of me. so then i snapped and said i what said about your blog not being safe for neurodivergent people. maybe i shouldnt have said that but i was frustrated at that point cause i was trying to help and u and ur followers kept mocking me for it.

this is the last message i will respond to of yours and i am only responding because i would like you to stop flooding my inbox. it is incredibly upsetting and you do not seem to be getting the message to let this drop.

to me, speaking in caps is yelling. saying 'but i WAS right' and 'you ARE the op' is incredibly aggressive, especially when it follows on from a perfectly fine interaction where we resolved what you meant. the issue is not mixing the sets up, these things happen and it was easily resolved with the follow up message! but you continued to push at me and to be honest, you put my back up. i don't think it's fair for you to sit here and expect me to not get defensive when you seem to keep messaging me being upset that i didn't immediately understand what you meant? and also for you to expect my tone to be perfect, but you're allowed to say whatever you want?

as i tried to explain, i'm sorry but pointing out a mistake that is a year old isn't helpful to me. i know you were trying to help! but what you're effectively doing is pointing to something i have no power to change and go 'that's wrong'. now that sets my perfectionism right on edge because i then go 'oh god, this is wrong, everyone knows what an idiot i am, but i can't change it'. which is what i was trying to explain to you at the time. i understand you were trying to help, however i was trying to explain to you that it's not helpful towards me because i cannot change it. i tried to tell you i can’t do anything about it because it’s an old set, but you wouldn’t let the subject drop and continued to message me about it being wrong and needing changing.

also, no one was mocking at you. you sent that ask saying i was picking on you for being autistic before i'd even received any other asks and comments. and yeah, upon seeing that, my mutuals and followers tried to be there to support me because they're absolutely amazing people who could tell i was upset. and even then, no one has mocked you. they have called you out on being rude, and you could have taken that as a wake-up call to let it drop or apologise instead of continuing to play the victim.

lastly - i spend the majority of my time on my blog on the internet. does that not also tell you that i might not have the best communication skills either? we all struggle. that is no excuse to act like you can act rudely to me and i have to treat you perfectly in response.