#i mean this is just so interesting because he’s gone through everything on quesadilla already that is going on in purgatory
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guckies · 1 year ago
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@zylian made a post about q!foolish not becoming insane in purgatory and i found it really interesting because he actually hasn’t. He gets on like it’s a normal day and nothing’s wrong. It’s been on my mind for since that post so I have to discuss it.
The thing is that, this is kinda his day to day life on the island excluding the weather events. Like it just isn’t really purgatory for him at all because most of the stuff that happens in purgatory already happens to him on quesadilla.
So how do you put a guy who doesn’t really have anything through hell in purgatory when everything he goes through there is his normal day to day.
Also surprisingly this opens up bolas members to thinking how Foolish does though. Because they’ve all been through what Foolish’s normal day to day is. So they now kinda understand the philosophy that Foolish follows which is basically “funny until the day i die”
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babyboibucky · 4 years ago
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The Match - Part 7
Pairing: CEO!Bucky x Reader
Word Count: 3.6k (woops the longest part yet)
Summary: You finally decide to lower your pride and talk things out with Bucky.
Warnings: SMUT IS BACK BABIES! Oral (f receiving), edging, orgasm denial, also lots of alcohol consumption, Bucky stalking you, annoying people I guess? Uhhh y’all might want to strangle me at the end lmfaooooo
A/N: I’m gonna be honest, every single time I update this I get nervous as fuck because what if this story starts to suck lmao but okay I just hope everyone’s still enjoying this story. Thank you for the continuous support like fuck??? People actually like reading my shit so I’m really flattered. Sending y’all sloppy kisses ‘cause I’m a hoe like that
The Match Masterlist || MAIN MASTERLIST
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"Uhh you might want to slow down on the drinks."
Mark was right about the bar serving the best drinks. It was actually a Mexican-themed bar which also served Tex-Mex food. The drinks were so good that the main course hasn't even arrived yet and you were already on your third frozen margarita.
"Let me have this, Mark. It's been a pretty shitty week." you told him, finishing up your drink before asking the waiter for another round.
Mark watched you with a funny look on his face, the kind that was baffled at the way you were acting now. He probably thought you were all prim and proper, given your demeanor at the office. But with the way you were stuffing your mouth with chicken quesadillas, you were far from being the department head that everybody seemed to respect.
Stress eating. That was what you were doing, because holy shit did you get on Bucky's last nerve. With the message, no, more like warning, that he sent you earlier, you might as well have your last meal before your execution.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Mark carefully asked but there was a hint of amusement in his voice as he watched you eat.
You hummed, mouth full of food. "Totally okay. These quesadillas are the bomb, actually."
Mark laughed, "It's good that you're enjoying the food. I'll be honest, I really appreciate that you agreed to go on this date. I mean, if you even would like to call it that." he explained, much to your relief actually.
You swallowed your food and took a sip from your glass of water, "Thank you." you told him. "Well, this can be a date. A friendly one, of course." you awkwardly chuckled.
Mark nodded, "I don't want to pressure you into anything. I guess I got a little to enthusiastic earlier and I'm really sorry for that. It's just that...you're a really interesting person and you're cool." he admitted with a charming smile.
If Bucky was out of the picture, you would have actually swooned at Mark's charm. He wasn't so bad, he was tall and handsome. He oozed a certain charm, the nice guy kind of charm and any girl would really appreciate the honesty he was showing you now.
You smiled at him, "You're pretty cool too, Mark."
-
The friendly date was very fun, you definitely didn't expect to enjoy it to the point of forgetting about Bucky's warning. Mark was a nice guy, you realized. Bucky doesn't have to worry about him because it was never even your intention to make him jealous in the first place.
By the time the dessert was being served, you were bellowing from laughter. You literally had tears in your eyes from how hard Mark was making you laugh with his hilarious stories.
Little did you know that from someone else's point of view, you looked like you were having the time of your life with Mark. Your laughter, the ease you were exuding as the both of you talked-- it was very easy to misunderstand.
Especially if that point of view belonged to none other than Bucky, who was sitting silently inside his car that was parked right across the bar.
"Oh god, I can't breathe!" you exclaimed amid your laughter, leaning back against your seat.
Mark heaved out a shy, "That was really, really embarassing." he said timidly.
Mark's phone buzzed in the middle of the conversation, his face turning into a frown as he read the message.
"Hey, everything okay?" you worriedly asked.
"It's my younger sister. I'm needed back home." he explained with a sigh.
"Is everything okay?" you asked worriedly, holding Mark's arm to comfort him.
Mark nodded, "It's fine. It's just a little family emergency." he said before offering you an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, I can drop you off on the way home--"
"Hey, it's fine. You can go. I'll be fine. Your family needs you." you reassured with a smile.
Mark sighed, "I'll make it up to you next time." he said, fishing out a couple of bills from his wallet.
You walked out of the bar with Mark and bid goodbye, giving him a friendly hug before he slipped inside his car. As soon as Mark drove off, you headed back inside the bar and ordered a couple of shots because you badly needed to get Bucky off your mind.
-
Your head was pounding when you stirred awake, your throat burning and vision spinning as you opened your eyes. The light that greeted you made you hiss, pulling the covers over your head you tried to get back to your slumber.
Until you realized that the bed was soft, too soft to be your own. And when did you even own a duvet?
Slowly but surely, you sat up and looked around you, taking in the unfamiliar surroundings. This was definitely not your room. Shit, did you sleep with Mark? Fuck no, you remembered him going home early due to a family emergency.
You squeezed your temples and shut your eyes, trying your best to recall everything that happened after you went back to the bar. Flashes of tequila shots and glasses of mojitos made you dizzy. Jesus christ, how many did you drink?!
And then you threw up in the streets as you attempted to walk home. Shit. Someone pulled your hair back while you puked and then there was nothing but darkness.
Pulling the duvet down, you noticed that you weren't wearing anything but a white shirt and your panties. You lifted the shirt up to your nose and sniffed it.
The scent was too memorable to forget.
"I thought you wouldn't be up until the afternoon."
You stilled at the sound of Bucky's voice and you almost didn't want to look up from your lap when he walked into his bedroom. How the hell did you end up at his place?!
"Four frozen margaritas, two shots of tequila and two tall glasses of mojito. I'm surprised you're still alive." he said as he stood at the foot of the bed, his arms crossed over his broad chest.
He was wearing a tight black shirt and a pair of grey sweatpants. This was the most casual you'd ever seen Bucky, but also the most feral. You thought that the scowl he gave you at the elevator was the worst, apparently, this Bucky in front of you, seemed the most dangerous.
"Why am I here?" you asked softly.
Bucky rolled his eyes and walked over to the bed side table, fetching the glass of water and a bottle of painkillers that you failed to notice when you woke up.
"Drink." he commanded and waited for you to take the glass before moving back to stand at the foot of the bed.
Your eyes never left Bucky's when you popped a pill into your mouth. After drinking water, you carefully placed it back on the bedside table and exhaled heavily.
"What happened last night?" you asked again.
"Your date left you." Bucky said, matter of factly.
You snickered, "It wasn't a date and Mark didn't le--"
Your very own squeal cut your statement off when Bucky threw the duvet aside, grabbing your ankle and pulling you towards the edge of the bed until your legs were hanging off. He didn't waste any time to kneel in between your thighs, holding your neck in place as his nose brushed against yours.
Your lids fluttered at the closeness, his scent yet again invading your senses, making you lose all your inhibitions because fuck, it's been too fucking long.
"Let me have this, please..." Bucky whispered against your lips.
When you failed to respond, Bucky took it as his go signal to crash his lips against yours. You knew this was a bad idea because one taste of Bucky and you're gone and yet you let him take what he needed from you.
Because you needed him just as much. So you kissed him back fervently, your fingers carding through his hair as you tugged him closer, wanting to feel and taste all of him.
Bucky breathily chuckled when you whined as he pulled away, only to shower your neck with open-mouthed kisses which made your body buzz with need. Your head was still hurting and you felt like you were going to pass out from dizziness but fuck it, you couldn't care less. Especially not now when Bucky was now nipping at your inner thigh while his hands were spreading you wide open.
All your thoughts flew right out of the window the moment Bucky pushed your underwear aside, his mouth quickly latching over your clit. A needy, raspy moan escaped your lips when Bucky sucked your bud followed by his tongue flattening against your folds.
"Fuck, Bucky..." you breathed out, falling down on your back as he continued lapping up your pussy.
You'd almost forgotten how fucking good Bucky was with his mouth and tongue. You elicited another whimper when he pulled back, but only to stand up and pull down his sweatpants, revealing his cock-- already hard and weeping with pre-cum.
In one swift motion, Bucky slid into your cunt. He leaned down to kiss you, swallowing your moans as you adjusted to his size. With how your pussy was clenching down on his cock, you realized that indeed, it's been too fucking long.
Bucky moved slow at first, letting you adjust to him before he began to speed up his thrusts. His breathing was erratic, soft grunts and growls reverberating from his chest as he fucked you. You gripped his forearms when he started pistoling his hips into yours, the head of his cock kissing your cervix.
"Want you to watch me fuck you." he growled, pulling you up to lean against your elbows.
Bucky held your neck with both his hands, forcing you to look down at your pussy while his cock slides in and out of it. Your face scrunched into pleasure, your mouth open as moans and whimpers continued to escape past your lips.
"Keep your eyes on my cock, see how your pussy takes all of it." Bucky demanded as he fucked you relentlessly.
Your thighs began to tremble, your entire body thrumming from pleasure. You tried to keep your eyes open as you watched Bucky fuck you fast and hard. Clawing at his biceps, you held on for dear life when you felt yourself teeter at the edge of your climax.
"Gonna cum, Bucky..." you moaned as your eyelids fluttered.
Bucky kissed your hard, taking your bottom lip in between his teeth before tugging at it. He pressed a soft kiss beneath your ear, licking at your skin before sucking your earlobe.
"Remember this when that Marcus fails to fuck you real good." he whispered and then pulled out just before you could even cum.
You blinked, unable to process what just happened. Bucky stood up and pulled his sweatpants back up. He rubbed his chin angrily before turning to you.
"You really blew me off to be with a guy who left you at the bar." he said.
Bucky really seduced you, fucked you raw only to edge you and deny you of your fucking orgasm. And now he was reprimanding you? While your legs were spread, panties pushed aside and your wet pussy out there for the world to see. You quickly adjusted your underwear, pulled your shirt down and sat up.
"What the fuck, Bucky?" you hissed. "First of all, his name is Mark. Second, he didn't leave me at the bar!" you exclaimed before you realized something.
"Wait, how did you know?" you asked, finally realizing that Bucky seemed to know everything that took place last night. "Bucky, did you follow me at the bar? Is this why I'm here?" you asked, standing up to come face to face with him.
Bucky shrugged, "So what if I did? If I didn't, you'd wake up in the streets, in your own vomit because again, you went for a guy who couldn't even bring her girl home. You should actually thank me." he said.
"Thank you!" you yelled. "I appreciate you bringing me back to your place. I really do." you said, calmly this time. "But can you please not bring Mark into this because he's a nice guy." you explained, squeezing the bridge of your nose.
Bucky snorted, "You call that nice? He left you!" he said again.
"He didn't! There was an emergency, for fuck's sake! He needed to go home and I said I can take care of myself." you said. "I shouldn't even be explaining myself to you yet I am because you're being really irrational right now." you scolded Bucky.
Bucky shook his head, "You really expect me to believe you? I saw how you laughed with him, how carefree you looked when you talked. How you caressed his arm and you're asking me not to bring Mickey into this conversation?"
You hid your face into your palms, "It wasn't a date, Bucky. We both made it clear. And he's a good person, I enjoyed talking to him. That's it. And again, it's Mark." you said through gritted teeth.
"Not a date my ass, you were flirting with him." Bucky accused.
You scoffed, "I wasn't flirting with him! I was casually talking to him like how a friend would! How hard is that to understand, Bucky?!" you exclaimed.
"You were never like that with me!"
"It's because we did nothing but fuck each other, Bucky!"
"That's why I wanted to make it official but you said no!"
"I already told you the reason why!"
"And yet you went out with a co-worker!"
"We're not just co-workers, Bucky. You're my fucking boss! The fucking CEO! How many times do I have to...you know what, it's useless for me to even explain it again to you." you said.
Bucky chuckled bitterly, "You're going to regret this." he said with a sinister smirk.
"Why can't you understand where I'm coming from?" you asked exasperatedly.
"Maybe because you won't let me help you." he said confidently. "And you know what I hate the most about this thing we have? It's that you want me too but you're too stubborn to give in. And you know what? I'll make sure you do." Bucky said, towering over you and staring deeply in your eyes.
"What I want, I always get."
-
The weekend passed by like a blur-- a huge, messy blur that made your head and heart hurt. You wanted to spend the weekend to ponder on things, to forget about Bucky even for just a while and now that was impossible after everything that happened.
You caved in first, that was for sure. And the thing is, you don't even regret it but then Bucky exploded and now everything seemed to have gotten worse. You understood why he was so mad at Mark, poor guy though, but he wouldn't even listen to you when you said that the date wasn't even a legitimate one!
"What the fuck did I get myself into?" you uttered under your breath as you sat in your car in the parking.
You began to analyze the situation you were in and drew out possible solutions to your dilemma. Nothing a good conversation can't solve, right? So maybe talking things out with Bucky properly would make things right. The previous conversations you had with him were always too emotional with both your egos getting in the way.
Alright fine, you'd tone down your pride for Bucky this time around and tell him that you do want to be with him. It's just that the repercussions scared the living daylights out of you.
You can't afford to lose your job nor everyone's respect. So if you were going to do this with Bucky, he has to understand that he has to be really careful. Everything must be done in secret, for the meantime at least.
"That sounds about right." you sighed, feeling hopeful that this might actually work out.
The shift in your mood gave you a little bounce as you walked into the building. You were confident that maybe Bucky was able to calm down over the weekend. Perhaps today was a good day to have a decent talk with him.
As soon as you reached your floor, you hurriedly went to your cubicle to drop your things. The earlier you get to talk to Bucky, the better. So as soon as you were done, you jogged back to the elevator excitedly, unable to notice how everyone seemed to be preoccupied gossiping about something.
Your heart was pounding as you walked along the corridor leading to Bucky's office. Fuck, you were really going to risk it all for one Bucky Barnes. You were a few steps away from the door, ready to reach for the knob when an unfamiliar voice called your attention.
"I'm sorry?" you asked, turning around.
"Sir James said not to let anyone disturb him right now." you were met with the presence of a blonde girl who looked younger than you, an intern maybe?
You nodded but then spared another glance at Bucky's office. "Yeah, I uhh need to talk to him. It's usually not a problem for me to barge into his office." you explained with a soft chuckle.
The girl made a face, "I'm sorry, but I'm just following Sir James' orders." she explained, walking around the desk near Bucky's office.
"I don't think we've met. Are you an intern?" you asked, trying to be as nice as much as possible.
The girl giggled, straight on giggled cutely and stood up again. She excitedly extended an arm for an overly eager handshake, "I'm Beverly. I'm Sir James' secretary. It's my first job!"
You blinked, "Oh...oh uh what happened to Amelie?" you asked, curious about Bucky's previous secretary.
Beverly tilted her head, "I don't know. I just got a call over the weekend from Sir James, offering me the job so I accepted it. I mean, he is pretty cute. Right?" she said in a soft voice.
Is this Bucky's plan? To hire a younger, more bubbly secretary who'd follow his every order? Someone who was the complete opposite of you? Because if this was his plan to get you to cave, it wasn't working. At all.
Sure, Beverly was pretty and young and very chirpy. But you were sure she wasn't Bucky's type. He was never into obedient little girls, hell, your defiance turned Bucky on. This was definitely not working.
You didn't know why, but instead of relief you felt even more nervous. Because if this wasn't Bucky's threat to you, what could it be? You snapped out of your pessimism, maybe Bucky came around over the weekend too?
Only one way to find out.
"Beverly..." you carefully said. "I'm just going to go inside. And don't worry, I'll make sure that Mister Barnes won't get mad at you. This is all me, alright?" you reassured.
Beverly pouted and sighed, "I don't know, because he was very clear with his instructions. And he's talking to--"
"I got you, Bev. I'm going in now." you said, cutting her off and then going straight for Bucky's office.
Taking in a deep breath, you pushed the door open and wasted no time to talk.
"Hey, I really need to talk to you. I thought about--"
"Oh, who's this little lady?"
Your eyes widened upon seeing Bucky in the company of another woman. She looked like she was around your age, except that she was taller and had legs for days. Her brunette hair reached past her shoulders in lovely waves. She was wearing a white chiffon blouse paired with a pair of black trousers and matching stilettos.
She oozed the charm of a lady boss. The way she carried herself reminded you of someone but you just couldn't point out who it was.
"I'm sorry to interrupt." you said, straightening up and turning to look over at Bucky who lifted a brow at you.
That fucking look of mischief.
"I told Beverly not to let anyone in." he said.
"I just wanted to--"
"Oh come on now, Bucky. Don't be so grumpy this early, you were about to call everyone for a meeting anyway." the woman said, turning to you with a smile.
Did she just call him...Bucky?
Shit. Shit. Shit.
Bucky rolled his eyes and sighed, "Yeah, well you're already here might as well introduce you first."
You narrowed your eyes at Bucky in confusion, "I don't understand what's going on." you said.
Bucky stood up from his chair and walked over to the other woman, standing beside her. Seeing them side by side was making you feel things. You haven't even seen them interact that much but you were already sensing that you were going to hate their dynamics.
"This is Mackenzie. I hired her to help us out on a huge project which I will be discussing with the entire team this morning." Bucky introduced a little too proudly for your liking.
Mackenzie offered her hand, "You can just call me Kenzie. I'm a marketing consultant. And you are?" she asked.
Your blood boiled, your eye twitched and your heart ached. Because now you realized who it was that Mackenzie reminded you of when it came to her charisma.
You.
And not only did she have a similar personality to yours-- confident and had authority-- but she also seemed to be here to take the one thing you worked so hard for.
You offered a smile, taking Mackenzie's hand in yours as you mentioned your name, your piercing eyes glancing over at Bucky.
"I'm the head of marketing."
-
The Match Special Tags:
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xaidyl · 4 years ago
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You could explain individual stuff! I find these explanations very fascinating, actually! OwO
okay! lets do this (this may be a very long post with lots of my random opinions but we’ll go with it) (and also please bear in mind these are jokey and in no real way a representation of these real people with real actual lives.)
***spoilers for most D20 seasons with this cast***
1.The babysitting 
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Actual parent:Brennan 
From my experience DMing, you are effectively a parent to the players. He would also be an excellent dad
Wine aunt: Siobhan
Siobhan gives me vibes of someone who would take a bottle of wine to go babysit, then sit and tell the kids stuff about cults that they weren’t meant to hear. She would definitely teach the kids swear words, and they would love their cool auntie 
Great at babysitting: Lou
Part of the key to babysitting is being relatable to the kids, but also self assured enough to get them to behave. the person who holds that key is Lou Wilson. He also has played dad-energy characters, and that is the kind of vibes that you look for in a babysitter. 
Mediocre at babysitting: Murph
This scenario needs some theatre of the mind. Imagine Murph, he’s read all the babysitting books, he knows everything he could need to know, he lives with Emily Axeford. He’s more than prepared for this task. He tries so hard. The kids love him. The kids also walk all over him. They don’t get to bed in time. He wanted to do a good job. He tried so hard to do a good job. Yet somehow, luck is against him. 
The house is on fire, God is dead: Emily
Fig. Sofia. Jet. All three of these characters would set a house on fire without hesitation, and not one fears God. What does this have to do with Emily’s babysitting ability? Well, all these characters are teaching us to be chaotic beings, just like Emily. We are the children, and D20 is our babysitter. Emily would only replicate the same thing in this babysitting scenario. 
The children: Zac and Ally
I believe it was episode 9 of the unsleeping city. Neither Zac nor Ally were involved in the scene in question. Siobhan makes a reference to Eliza Doolittle, to which Zac makes a Dr Doolittle joke. Beardsley then shouts ‘I can see my dick’, a reference to a different film. This is fairly normal behaviour, and would not make either of them children in this scenario, had they not continued to hysterically laugh for the next ten minutes or so. Sat at opposite sides of the table. I think Zac starts crying at some point. They are absolute children, and also both have strong baby energy. Neither babysit, they are the ones that need babysitting. 
2. Can they be killed?
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Cannot be killed: Brennan
The man is a God. Enough said. Also I’m pretty sure your body would reject your soul before it allows you to kill him. 
Can only be killed by one thing: Siobhan
You would be tricked into thinking Siobhan would be easy to kill- her constitution score is so low, after all. However, you would be wrong. The low constitution score has only made her stronger. More aware. What is the one thing that can kill her, though? Nobody knows, she’s only told those she truly trusts. It could be the most rare poison in the world. Or it could just be Mike Trapp. He (allegedly) has previous.
Can be killed but it won’t last: Emily
It is not anything to do with Emily that her death won’t last. In fact, Emily would be pretty easy to kill. However, if you kill her, Murph will do everything in his power to bring her back. He travels to the end of the earth, and then Emily Axeford is back and gets her new death date in a fancy gothic necklace.
Can be killed but at what cost?: Lou
What cost? The cost to the world. The world would be significantly worse off. You wouldn’t be able to live with yourself. It’s not worth it.
Can be killed but it’s not worth it: Murph
It’s not worth killing Murph because you would have precisely 0.7 seconds before you were killed by Emily. There is no way you can profit from this scenario, you would be dead before you even realise you’ve been successful. 
Can be killed and it would be pretty funny: Zac
I feel like we don’t discus the correlation between Zac Oyama characters and dying enough. Gorgug was the first D20 death. Lapain was the first D20 perma death. Ricky just like had a weapon that causes him to die. If you killed Zac, it would just be funny because its happened so much. Sorry Zac.
Can be killed but why would you, you monster?!?!: Ally
We’ve already discussed this. Beardsley is Baby. Leave them alone. 
Please kill them they suck: Box of Doom
I dont trust them
3. The fitness gram pacer test
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this is definitely the most controversial of the charts, but there’s three of things you need to understand about my reasoning.
1. Zac is fast at running  
This has been seen a couple of times, namely: adventuring party, where Zac tried to tease Brennan about showing off how fast he his at running, but it turns out it was just Zac speaking his mind, and he is the one who always shows off at how fast he is at running. Also, the video on Siobhan’s instagram of Zac jumping over that table. 
He is also very bad a squats. Why would you be bad at squats? Bad knees. Why would you get bad knees? Running without sufficient warm up. Why would you skip warm up? Because you are very focussed on being able to run fast. 
2. Zac is willing to defend his title of running fast
The way he accused Brennan on adventuring party, he knew what he was doing. Sabotage. Brennan may also be able to run fast, but Zac would prevent him from getting a good score. How? He has his ways. Zac is a good boy, but not when it comes to running fast.
3. I felt bad
I had to give Zac at least one good one :)
Anyways onto the other choices:
Actually tried and got a low score: Brennan, Murph, Siobhan
We’ve already spoken about how Zac sabotaged Brennan to be the best at running. Murph is here because he would try really hard but something unlucky would happen. His shoelaces come untied. He accidentally gets caught in the Zac/Brennan feud. 
Siobhan started off with the intention to try, but after Lou, Emily and Ally had all done, she realised they were in fact much more interesting than the fighting going on. She walks out mid lap 
Didn’t try, got a low score, doesn’t give a shit: Lou and Emily
Its important to understand that both Lou and Emily are capable of getting a high score, they are just better than the whole thing. Why is their DnD group doing a pacer test? Why did Zac suspiciously force them to do this whole thing? 
The difference between them is Lou knows the feud is stupid and has like actual work to do? He sits and auditions for some other big film. He still watches over his laptop. 
Emily however, simply wants to watch the world burn.
Despite their different approaches to the situation, they both have a bet going on who’s going to be the fastest runner.
Ran one singular lap and finished: Ally
Ally Beardsley shows up at the track wearing a rainbow bucket hat and a tie dye shirt that is impracticable to run in. They have a llama with them. At no point do they explain this. They walk round the track once, drink their water from a plant pot, then spend the rest of the time cheering on the others with words that don’t quite make sense. 
4. Storming Area 51
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They cant stop us all: Zac and Brennan
Neither mean it maliciously, but both believe entirely in what they are saying. 
Brennan is definitely the guy to go mad over a conspiracy theory. He made all the crown of candy NPCs. He is basically betraying himself. He knows not to trust anyone. He doesn’t trust area 51. The next season of dimension 20 is this as a subliminal messages all the way through. 
Zac says it accidentally. He’s making a character for the charity livestream. He’s still got a hundred hours of character making left. He’s done so many bad squats. Unintentionally, he makes a character that forces all the zesbians to storm area 51. 
Have fun getting shot, dumbasses: Lou
The rest of the cast are being weird again. Lou is equally as capable of being weird, but sometimes they need to chill. It starts with Emily talking about diner ice. It finishes with Brennan wearing a foil hat at all times. 
You guys stop, someones actually gonna do it: Murph
Murph is a good, lawful boy.
Actually shows up: Emily and Siobhan
They ride a motorcycle there together. They wouldn’t have gone alone, but as a duo they are an unstoppable pair. Emily wants to break into a government facility. Siobhan desperately want to be in the real life x-files.
One of the Aliens: Ally
Emily and Siobhan open a door at area 51. Behind it is Ally Beardsley. They are wearing a rainbow bucket hat and a tie dye shirt. They have a llama standing behind them. This is not explained at any point. They drink from a flower pot and eat a quesadilla that appears out of nowhere. 
5. Stabbing 
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Would never stab anyone: Murph
Murph is a good, lawful boy
Would stab in retaliation: Lou, Murph, Zac
Lets be honest, the entirety of a crown of candy so far has been these three taking stabs (or metaphorical ‘where is your bulb now’ stabs) as retaliation for a stab another one of these three had done.
Yells “I won’t hesitate bitch” first: Ally and Siobhan
I can’t really explain this one much more other than i’m pretty sure both these people have said this phrase at least once in their life.
Would stab as a warning: Emily
This would be promptly followed by Murph getting her to stop stabbing. Or, depending on the situation, encouraging her to keep stabbing.
6. The water fountain
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Fills up a bottle and drinks from it: Lou and Siobhan
This is the normal way to drink from the water fountain. They were also both very concerned at watching Beardsley’s various different drinking apparatuses in adventuring party. 
Bought 4 water bottles so this wouldn’t happen: Murph
He is prepared. Something probably still goes wrong, but at least he’s got three water bottles left. 
Drinks straight from the tap: Brennan
Brennan is a busy guy. The tap is there, it’s convenient, he needs to get back to planning. There’s so many campaigns, so many characters, so many voices. 
Dehydrates: Zac
Honestly I’m not sure if this man would drink water if nobody told him so
Drinks from a puddle: Ally
like they drink from a vase with a flower, a puddle really isn’t that much of a stretch.
Licks the tap: Emily
She just wants to see the world burn. Also, she knows Brennan drinks straight from the tap. She has to get payback somehow. 
7. A child starts crying
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Makes the child laugh: Lou
We’ve already discussed how Lou has dad energy. I feel like he’s know exactly what to say and how to act to get the child to stop crying. This is less stupid than the rest of my explanations, but I always love how expressive Lou is when he plays dnd. I’m not sure whether its the way he holds himself or the way he gestures, but I’m pretty sure if I was a crying child, I would stop crying if Lou Wilson told me a joke in that very soothing point.
Tries to play with the child: Siobhan and Ally
These two kinda give me older/younger sibling vibes. As a team I recon they could create a game that would calm this child down. Also Ally knows techniques to help adults calm down, they could probably implement these ideas into a game for children.
Gives detailed instructions: Murph
His knowledge comes from the books he has read to learn how to babysit, and the one time he babysat. His explanation is rather frantic however, mostly because he is trying to defend Emily in his answer.
Cries with the child: Zac
He’s sad because all his friends are speaking to this child an nobody noticed how fast he just ran.
He’s also baby, as we’ve said previously, so he probably relates to the child somewhat
The reason the child is crying: Emily and Brennan
The child just watched episode 9 of a crown of candy. 
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