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moonshynecybin · 4 months

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what would you consider essential marc and rosquez watching? i don’t mean races but the stuff happening around it, there seems to be so much and idk where to start 😭

BIG ass question. i think it depends what you want outta this and how you best interact with content slash consume information. for me (not to brag but. winner of multiple historical essay writing competitions in high school. for context on the kind of freak i am bringing to the table here.) the research is kind of the fun part ! like i just started googling shit! i would go to inactive blogs and just search 'marquez' on them to see what would happen ! a lot of the times that works ! but it also takes a lotttt of time lol so i'll chuck some good resources your way, why not...

okay im not sure how basic we're talkin here but um. background. so the documentaries are, i think. the best place to start. theyre entertaining and offer a good amalgamation of clips to provide context for the actual racing. and like i know you de-emphasized racing (which is fine lol who cares) but it really is like the most important thing in the world to these fools and its a pretty visual sport so i think its at least helpful. like yes sepang IS about the press conference, but its also about the conversation they have ON the race track using their motorcycles. which is also somewhat a conversation that they HAVE been having all year long...

i'd start with hitting the apex (2013), its a GREAT introduction to the "characters" that does a lot of legwork to contextualize everything. lays the scene for where vale is at coming into his relationship with marc (both personally, wrt to marco simoncelli, and career-wise concerning his flop at ducati), and also how insane marc's whole deal is in general. the second half is. materially a study on what him entering the premiere class did to the sport as a whole. the introductory chapter in many respects

marc marquez: all in. MY introduction and blissfully free online. marc comma in his own words, with all the implications of that. a self-produced documentary where he is giving feedback about the edit of said documentary straight to camera and no less vulnerable because of it which is very marc imo. revealing both intentionally AND unintentionally about his whole deal with injury, vale, and his image.

motogp unlimited. im gonna be real kind of boring. like i would still watch it ! but do it kind of later, once you know the major players so youre automatically more invested. it doesnt really give you more than marc says himself in all in tbh, and i get the sense him and vale were NAWWWT interested in doing more than the bare minimum for it.

marc's rookie doc. free and subtitled on the youtubes. the first half of this is deadass just him wanting to fuck vale so bad while every comment from vale has me saying GIRL. out loud because the foreshadowing would be genuinely shocking if this was fiction. anyways the laguna seca of it all....

next i would hit up PODCASTS ! i think it makes sense after the documentaries, because these are all podcasts that arent strictly about rosquez (even if they are in many ways the main characters lmao) and personally it helps to put faces to lesser known names that might pop up before i listen to a purely audio product and get lost in the soup of sounds. the paddock pass podcast has two retrospective episodes about the 2015 season that are really good at context, oxley bom pod has a fun recent episode on valentino that i love, again just poke around a lil

videos. these guys have never filmed a lot of content together tragically. what i wouldnt give for someone to make them do an escape room. anyways ranch visit HERE (post explaining the ranch visit here). sepang presscon (sowwy) here. vale unhinged podcast interview the month after marc's documentary came out here. vale retirement interview where he gets asked about marc here. vale talking about asking marc to the ranch here. vale postrace at argentina 2018 here. UCCIO postrace at argentina 2018 here. theres a lot moreeeee just go on my blog archive and filter for rosquez and vids its easier lol

journalism. hello. okay so you should genuinely spend some time reading through mat oxley's stuff he can write (theres a paywall but you can run that shit through wayback machine). he also loves an insane comparison which i do enjoy.... again this is one that can be solved by googling his name and tacking on 'marquez' or 'rossi' or a specific time period or race it will probably reap some dividends. in terms of specific ass articles this one is kind of load bearing in terms of sepang and some of the interpersonal competitive tensions at play. that being said there are manyyyyyy crazy interviews and snippents of articles from other journos floating around motogp tumblr (like literally too many to link) adn its fun to dig around to find them, but mat oxley gets a shoutout because i was reading this article TODAY !

other content. honestly one of the best resources I'VE found for plotting out the arc of their relationship is @kingofthering's everyrosquezpodium series. you can REALLY see it play out lol. also her tagging system rules she very neatly lays out years and races... so if something jumps out at you, CLICK ITTTT ! also all of @ricciardoes fave presscon moments series. insane.

all this to say a small little rpf fandom like this rewards some digging! i would just recommend following narrative threads that interest you ! its also a small fanbase that is pretty research oriented, so if youre ever confused about somethin, just shoot an ask or run a search on someone's blog (@kwisatzworld has endless vale resources and @batsplat is one of the most thorough researchers ive ever seen, for example) like for real theres so much... i also have a primer that i made forever ago that has some links on it so you can peruse that if you so wish. but frankly a lot of it is just using those research muscles and being sufficiently deranged enough to be screenshotting reddit threads at one am so you can post them to tumblr because they mentioned marc and vale in the same sentence and that lit up some of the neurons in your brain

(and i know you said outside of races but i think theyre good benchmarks as turning points soooo you should do some diggin on laguna seca 2013, jerez 2015, argentina 2015, ASSEN 2015, sepang 2015 obvi, argentina 2018, and misano 2019. those are the big tentpoles of insane rosquez relationship drama imo. i mean theres many more but. im limiting myself.)

#i also. found stuff bc i did a lot of digging around in blogs archives from 2013-2015. but this was because i was unemployed #and my migraines made reading books (my FAVORITE THINGGG) kinda hard for like 6 months #so i was acting like a border collie that hadnt been walked in two weeks but like. mentally. and we got here.#tumblr didnt hurt my head so much NOOOO idea why #motogp #callie speaks #asks #rosquez

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tala-bez-i · 3 months

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At first sight Chapter Twenty-Four

(m!reader x Bonten!Haruchiyo Sanzu)

Fluff/slash/reader is male/cursing/BontenTimeline/drugs and alcohol mentioned/violence/blood/death

All characters that appeared in the Tokyo Revengers manga and anime belong to Ken Wakui.

Words: 4844

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You and Sanzu sat in the backseat of the Haitani brothers' elegant car as you drove with a few men in two more cars to Sato, Nagano and Kuroda's hideout, which you had received a tip from a trusted source. Thanks to Nagasawa and Junko, you were 100% sure that the men were there, so you didn't anticipate any problems.

Despite focusing on checking your gun and the number of bullets in each of the three spare magazines you had prepared, you listened to the excited Sanzu's story. Of course, he had already taken some of his drugs, which he seemed to only part with for sleep purposes, but he still seemed to have a clear head.

Of course, every few minutes Ran Haitani had to tell him not to unbuckle his damn seat belt, and you managed to put it back on for him about three times, but apart from that, nothing deviated from any norm. Haruchiyo usually followed safety precautions when he rode in the front of the car with you, but it was more than once the case when he rode in the backseat. You still hadn't been able to figure out why he did this, but you suspected the tinted rear windows gave the illusion of invisibility.

“Sanzu, for fuck's sake, behave yourself.” Ran said, now slightly irritated, looking back over his shoulder.

“I'm behaving, what the fuck do you mean?” The pink-haired man answered him, loosening his seat belt.

“Then behave better because there is no difference.”

“Fuck you.” Sanzu muttered under his breath, and you shot him a warning look, which he responded with a snort and a roll of his eyes. “Okay, but it's not my fault that I'm so full of energy.”

It was...

“You shouldn't have taken the pills.” Rindou commented on this, looking at him in the rearview mirror. “If you screw something up…”

“He won't screw anything up.” You interjected with a sigh. “I will be there for him. Let's stick to the plan."

“Then... If he screws up, you'll be responsible for it, L/n.” The older Haitani said in a calm tone, and you knew exactly what that could mean.

“I won't screw anything up.” Sanzu grumbled quietly, making a grumpy face and turned his head to look through the glass.

“You won't. We have twelve other people with us. We will deal with Sato and his men in no time.” You said, directing your gaze to the rearview mirror so you could look at Rindou, who gave you a quick glance and a nod.

“We don't know how many there are.” Ran reminded and you shrugged.

“And they forget who they are messing with.”

"Exactly." Sanzu laughed quietly, not taking his eyes off the views through the car window. “This is the night when they will regret coming out of their mothers' wombs.”

“I'd love to push them back in there.” You mumbled and Sanzu turned his head towards you. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see his half-amused, half-disgusted expression.

"You are disgusting."

“We're getting there.” The younger Haitani commented and after a short while you saw an abandoned three-story building.

The car stopped and other Bonten cars stopped near you. No one got out of the vehicles waiting for your signal. There was silence inside the Haitani brothers' car and you felt a strange shiver run down your spine.

“So…” Rindou began, taking the keys out of the ignition.

“Yeah, so…” His older brother cleared his throat, and you realized you weren't the only one who felt a twinge of uncertainty.

“Let's get this over with.” Sanzu growled and got out of the car.

“Wait…” You tried to grab his hand, but the man was faster, leaving you no choice but to follow him. “Fuck…”

The remaining men followed closely behind you and Ran motioned for them to split up and try to enter the building through other possible entrances. You noticed that many of the windows had no glass or the windows themselves were boarded up with fiberboard to prevent intruders from entering. Who would want to sit here?

“According to information from Nagasawa, there are two entrances, but you can easily use the unblocked windows.” Rindou reminded and you all drew your weapons at the same time to keep them at the ready, but none of you raised them. “Our targets should be sitting in one of the rooms at the back of the building on the third floor.”

"What is this place?" You asked as you approached the main entrance. There was a roof over it, with traces of a plaque visible on it, which probably contained the name of the building.

“Private clinic for the insane. It closed down about twenty years ago.” Rindou replied to you, focusing on the double doors.

"Great. Why?"

“The business collapsed when it came to light that two nurses were killing patients. They allowed them to do this for almost five years.” Sanzu said with a wide smile on his face. “Patients' well-being above all else.”

“Harsh.” You grumbled and went inside.

The hall of the former clinic was large and its elegance faded over time. There was rubbish and dead leaves lying everywhere, and there were lamps on the walls with peeling wallpaper, most of which had broken lampshades, but some of them were still working.

“Shouldn't they cut off the electricity here?” You asked, looking around the room.

“They did it, although as you can see it was enough to bypass a few security measures…” Rindou replied to you, his voice echoing further.

“There's no guard.” He noticed Ran's contemptuous tone and looked at you with a sly smile. “Let's split up and surprise our hosts. Rindou.”

He moved to the left, and his younger brother followed obediently, leaving you and Sanzu the hall to the right.

“Let's not delay, Y/n. I wonder what they have hidden here.” The pink-haired man laughed, looking at you with eyes in which you saw a mad gleam. “Bring me luck again and you will receive another reward.”

Your cheeks started to get warmer, and thoughts started to enter your head that you shouldn't focus on at the moment. You snorted quietly and shook your head, following your, at this point, boss.

You walked in silence down the corridor immersed in semi-darkness, the echo of your footsteps bouncing off the walls. Still, no one was stopping you and you could see Sanzu becoming more and more confident. He stopped in front of a door and pushed it open with his foot. It opened with a creak of hinges and the interior of some kind of office, probably a doctor's office, appeared before your eyes. There was an old, rickety desk in front of the half-boarded window, and most of the floor was covered with scattered papers.

Sanzu picked one up and you looked at it, peering over the man's shoulder.

“These are patient files. Shouldn't they archive it?”

“I don't give a shit.” The other replied by dropping the paper back onto the dirty floor. He moved on and you gave the room one last glance and followed him.

You quickly climbed the stairs to the next floor, which seemed cleaner, as if someone had used it more often, and Haruchiyo's shoulders shook with silent laughter.

“I guess we need to start keeping an eye out, L/n.” He said calmly and at the end of the corridor a door opened with a cracked frosted glass insert.

You saw four of your men who let you know that the way was clear, so you moved on. Suddenly, a flash of light came through the boarded-up windows, and after a few seconds you heard the sound of thunder.

"Wonderful weather." Sanzu joked and another cold shiver ran down your spine.

Suddenly, you heard a few quiet curses from down the hall and the sound of something heavy being pushed across the floor. You and Haru looked at each other and moved towards the sounds. Your heart was beating faster due to the adrenaline.

You stopped in front of another room where you heard a quiet shuffling sound and Haru looked at you. His pupils were dilated from the drugs he had taken. He put his index finger to his lips, which were twisted in a cruel smile, telling you to remain silent. You raised your gun slightly and when Sanzu kicked the door, you both ran inside.

In the dim light that came through the poorly sealed window, you saw a figure that you immediately recognized as male. Sanzu tried to throw a punch at the enemy he encountered, but he quickly dodged it and responded quickly with the same, but the pink-haired man managed to block the incoming punch without the slightest problem.

You attacked the figure from the other side, trying to hit his head with the gun, but he leaned back greatly, avoiding the blow again. Unfortunately, this time the character bumped into some old furniture and lost his balance for a moment. That was it.

Your companion grabbed a dark figure by the jacket and threw it against the wall. You immediately jumped towards them and placed the barrel of the gun under the young man's chin, whose eyes almost popped out of their sockets in utter terror.

“Oh fuck, please don't…” You heard a familiar voice and recognized the young man in the dim light.

“What the hell are you doing here, Miyata?” You asked in disbelief, feeling your heart begin to grow cold.

“Miyata? Yata-chan?” Sanzu said in surprise, not letting go of the boy. On the contrary, his slim fingers tightened their grip on the thief's jacket. “You should be with Madarame at his club.”

“I… I'll explain everything…” The young man began in a tearful voice and you saw tears begin to form in his wide eyes. “I'll really explain everything, boss!”

“Shut up.” You growled, feeling anger surge through you. "What are you doing here?"

“A-Akira called, and I had to meet him. I…I had no choice!”

“You work for us, not him.” Sanzu said calmly, looking at him closer. “Or maybe you were working for him all along, huh?”

This time, Yata didn't say anything, his eyes darting from Sanzu to you and back again.

“Mikey let you go on with your life, why did you fuck it up?”

The young man you had grown to like looked down and swallowed hard. There was guilt written all over his face.

"Hey!" The pink-haired man yanked him hard enough that his head hit the wall. “You've been asked a question, you little shit.”

“Kuroda took me in once. I had no choice..." Said the boy, trying to free himself from Sanzu's grip, which he didn't like at all.

“Where do you think you're going, huh?” He smiled and turned to you. “Boy is a fucking informer. You know what to do, Y/n.”

“No, please Boss L/n, no!” Yata started crying, but you didn't say a single word.

When Haruchiyo's hands let go of the traitor's jacket and the man stepped back, you pulled the trigger without hesitation. There was a bang that, as fate would have it, merged with another thunderclap, which this time struck somewhere closer and the lifeless body of Fuku Miyata fell to the floor, leaving a smear of blood on the old wallpaper.

“And he could be useful.” Sanzu sighed theatrically, leaning over the body and shaking his head. “Don't hold it against yourself, Y/n. It's not your fault that some people are too weak and cowardly to take advantage of the opportunity once given to them to redeem themselves."

He straightened up and smiled at you. "Cheer up. This is not the first and not the last time someone has betrayed Bonten.”

“I take it more personally.” You replied in an icy tone, taking a tissue from your pocket and carefully wiping your face, where you could feel the wet droplets on it. When you looked at the tissue again, you saw red spots.

"That's good. Correctly." Number two commented on it and you moved on. “I wonder what he was looking for there.”

“I don't give a damn. Kuroda is mine.”

“Ooh. And for what reason?”

“Because Sato is yours and Nagano belongs to the Haitanis.”

“Where did this idea come from, hmm?” Sanzu became interested, looking at you carefully. “I believe Kuroda rules them and I'm just behind Mikey in the hierarchy…”

“Because he screwed up Miyata's life.”

“Yata screwed it up himself.” The man grumbled. “You got him, Mikey gave him another chance and he blew it because he was more afraid of Akira. Kuroda is mine.”

"Please."

Haruchiyo looked at you dispassionately, but after a short while he sighed and turned his head to look straight ahead again. "So be it. But don't fuck with him. Get this done quickly.”

"Thank you."

“Give it up.” The other one grumbled and you stopped in front of another staircase. “He won more than just your sympathy. He had a few whores wrapped around his little finger and Kakucho spoke highly of him.”

“We fell for it, that's all.” You said calmly, feeling disappointed and angry at yourself. You should have predicted that Akira wouldn't surround himself with such wimps as Yata made himself out to be.

You started climbing to the next floor and as soon as you walked through the door, you were greeted by a sight you weren't expecting. The windows along the entire length of the corridor were covered very tightly with fiberboards, so that no light from all the lit wall lamps escaped outside.

This floor was well-kept and there wasn't a single dead leaf or piece of trash on the carpeted floor. It was clear that you were in the right place.

At the end of the hall, you saw the Haitani brothers walking through the door, accompanied by some of the people from Bonten who had arrived with you, and the rest of the people stood on either side of the branch that must have led to the previously mentioned back of the building. Against one of the walls lay the limp bodies of three men you hadn't seen before. Some of them had traces of blood and beatings on them, but you didn't hear any shots.

Maybe the storm drowned them out? You saw the glint of blades in the two men's hands and realized that they were being extremely careful not to lure your targets into the corridor.

Both you, Sanzu and both Haitanis approached the branch and the leader of the small group of men explained the situation to you. From the room at the end of the corridor, you could hear loud bursts of laughter, some shouting and insults, but apart from three people, there was no one else in sight.

“We checked if they had any keys with them and it turned out that one guy had a whole bunch. We have checked and blocked off all accessible rooms on this floor.” One of the men, whose face was marked with small scars as if from shards of glass, spoke softly. “No additional opponents. There are some crates in two rooms that we haven't checked…” Another clap of thunder, followed by a burst of laughter at the end of the hall. “To the left there is a small warehouse made of two connected rooms. The shelves are full of some packages and bottles.”

"Contents?" Sanzu asked calmly and the man turned his hard, professional gaze on him.

“I suspect drugs and alcohol. Not verified.”

"All right."

"I'm not sure." Ran interjected, grimacing slightly.

"What do you mean?"

“Would they keep such valuable goods here unattended?”

"Right." You muttered, looking at the dead bodies against the wall and Sanzu huffed in annoyance. “But then again, we don't know how many people are behind that door.”

“Maybe they let the guards take a break.” Rindou nodded, checking his gun. “They're having a good time there.”

Suddenly there was a startled cry that sounded like a woman's, followed by another burst of laughter.

“Too good for my taste.” You grimaced in disgust and looked at the leader of the thugs. “Do we have any losses?”

“None. It was an easy job.”

“So, what are we waiting for? These motherfuckers are getting on my nerves.” Sanzu shook his head, relaxing the muscles in his neck and shoulders. “I want to go in there and fuck up everyone, including the whores they have there.”

“Leave some for the rest.” Rindou laughed softly and Ran signaled to approach the observed door. “It's time to get down to work.”

The closer you were to the door, the more words you heard, which were drowned out by the storm outside. It seemed like no one on the street would pay attention to the sounds of gunfire you were sure would happen that night. This will be the end. One of the problems will be solved...

“It's show time.” Sanzu laughed and kicked open the double doors, which hit the walls inside the room with a bang.

The heads of everyone gathered inside turned towards the entrance and any conversation or laughter died in the throats of people, both men and women. The room was quite large and well-lit by lamps that hung from the ceiling with peeling paint.

You counted about twenty people in various degrees of undress, including seven prostitutes. It seemed like you had interrupted the orgy and you were amazed that they were so willing to have fun with each other under the circumstances. People really reacted to stress in all sorts of different ways.

“Good evening, gentlemen... And ladies.” Sanzu greeted cheerfully, although there was a menacing note in his voice. “Sorry for the intrusion, but…” Men from Bonten lined up on either side of you and aimed their guns at the group. “For reasons well known to you, we are obliged to return the favor to you.”

“No offense…” Ran interjected, and from the tone of his voice you assumed he was directing his words at terrified women. “I should say it's nothing personal, but your hosts know it's complete nonsense.”

“You bastards…” You heard the voice of the man who started your latest adventure.

“Ladies, if you want to survive…” Sanzu smiled, leaning forward slightly. “You can still change sides…” Three women started walking towards you, and two of them were immediately shot by a man in a dark gray suit who was standing right next to Sato. “Or not…” Haru finished in a surprised voice.

"Kill them! What are you waiting for?!" The former club owner screamed, and his subordinates grabbed their weapons.

Not everyone managed to draw it because members of the Bonten gang opened fire on them. The bullets flew in both directions, hitting not only the bodies, but also the furniture and walls, causing the remaining women to burst into uncontrollable panic, which resulted in them being caught in the crossfire and dying on the spot. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw one prostitute who managed to break through your ranks and hid behind the wall right next to the door. At least one...

The bullet that whistled past your head brought you back to the ground and you focused on your opponents. You knocked over an empty table and hid behind it, dragging Sanzu with you, who snorted at you very displeasedly, but remained cautious. You saw Ran and Rindou do the same, finding cover behind another table. Three of your men were lying on the floor, but only one of them was still moving. His commander dragged him behind one of the couches, leaving streaks of fresh blood on the floor.

“Kill them all damn it! What am I paying you for?!” Sato screamed again and Sanzu leaned out from behind the table, aimed the gun, squeezed the trigger and there was a scream of pain.

“Hit.” He smiled widely at you and went back to exchanging fire with the rest of his still alive opponents. “Oh no, you're not going anywhere…” He growled, and before you could react, he was on his feet and chasing after two men who were leaving the room through a door at the opposite end.

“Sanzu!” You shouted after him, but he ignored you, so all you had to do was shield him with your own weapon.

“Where is this fucker running?!” You heard Rindou's voice.

"Leave him! Don't get in his way!” Ran answered him and when you saw the bottles of alcohol that the pink-haired man passed by exploded due to the impact of the bullet that was intended for him, you jumped up and followed him.

“L/n!”

You ignored Rindou's calls and ran after your friend, sending several bullets towards the man along the way, who was aiming at Sanzu's back again. They all hit their mark and you ran out into the dimly lit corridor. You saw Haruchiyo disappearing around the corner and you followed him with a loud curse.

“Sanzu!” You called out again, and when you heard the first few shots and a groan of pain, your heart sped up again. “Sanzu! For fuck's sake!”

You came around the corner and saw the body of one of the men running from you on the floor. You stopped next to him to check if he was still alive, but as soon as your fingers touched his neck you felt wetness. You turned his body and saw that at least two bullets had hit him in the neck, causing him to die instantly.

You wiped your hand on his suit and headed down the hall, resuming your pursuit. You saw another door behind which you heard the sound of shooting and stopped. Your first instinct was to rush inside, but you knew you could get shot or die right away, and dying was the last thing you wanted to do, so you crouched and carefully peered inside.

The room looked like a conference room, which surprised you, but you didn't pay much attention to it. What interested you most was Sanzu, who was hiding behind the tables, his face was full of determination and focus, but as soon as he saw you out of the corner of his eye, he turned his head towards you and in his bright eyes you saw madness and indescribable joy.

You nodded at him and moved, leaning heavily in the other direction, trying to get at your opponent from behind.

“Akira!” Sanzu shouted and the shots stopped. "Give up! You don't have the slightest chance!”

“For you to just kill me?!” A hoarse voice answered him.

“You're going to die anyway!” At Sanzu's words, Kuroda laughed briefly. “Don't drag it out. You better shoot yourself in the head, otherwise I'll do it for you!”

“I have a better idea! How about I put a bullet in your fucking head?!”

“Nah, I'll be fine!” Sanzu laughed from the other side of the room than you saw him, and it occurred to you that he had moved, apparently trying to get to Hachirou Kuroda as well.

“Fuck…” The other one swore, realizing it too, and you heard the tramp of feet, and after a while, several shots hit the wall and the furniture standing in the road.

You looked out from behind the table you were hiding behind and saw a pimp standing behind a wide concrete column, who was responsible for disappearing prostitutes from the streets and handing them over to Emiko and Daisuke.

“What did you get out of it, Kuroda?!” Sanzu shouted again. "Money? Satisfaction?”

“You can suck my dick, you fucking dog!”

“Not nice, very rude.”

“We were getting girls for the syndicate, but you were paying less and less!”

“Bullshit!” The pink-haired man growled furiously.

“Maybe yes, maybe no…” Akira growled, peeking out from behind the column, and as soon as the bullet from Haruchiyo's gun hit the concrete, sending shards of debris everywhere, he hid again. “They paid us more to kill those whores!”

“Who paid you?” Sanzu asked as he shot towards the column one more time. “Uchiyamas?!”

Kuroda let out a raspy laugh and from where you sat you saw him nod. “You have no idea! Too bad you got them, and the business went bust. They were seriously fucked up and the price didn't matter to them at all!”

“We got the whore, but the motherfucker escaped!” Sanzu said and Kuroda straightened up, quickly emerging from behind the column and hiding again.

"You are prattling nonsense." He said more quietly, and you heard the surprise in his voice. "Seriously?"

"Seriously."

There was silence for a moment, then the man burst out laughing again. “You're screwed! Oh fuck, you guys are totally fucked!”

“Huh? And why is that?” Sanzu asked a little hesitantly and in your mind, you could see the confusion written on his face.

“Because since he escaped you and you haven't found him yet…” He chuckled. “That means he'll get to his boss!”

“Nagano is dead!” The pink-haired man got angry, and you moved closer to the pimp as quietly as you could so as not to attract his attention.

“Nagano was a nobody! Just like that idiot Sato!”

“So, who is your boss?”

“Fuck you, you son of a bitch! You will find out when he starts slaughtering you one by one!”

“You have one last chance, Kuroda!”

“Fuck you!” Akira leaned out from his hiding place again and started shooting at the hidden Sanzu, so you moved even closer and as you stood right behind him, Haruchiyo shouted as if he telepathically knew where you were...

“L/n!”

You knew that hard tone of voice and you knew it only meant one thing. Kill.

Kuroda quickly turned towards you, purest terror appearing on his face, and without a word, you pulled the trigger, hitting the man in the face...

*bang, bang, bang*

Akira's limp body slid down the column to the floor, leaving a stain of blood and pieces of light goo on the concrete. At least one bullet passed through his skull.

You stood with your gun still pointed at him and when you heard footsteps, you didn't look up.

“Fuck…” Haruchiyo drawled, standing next to you and leaning forward. He laughed and shook his head. “Nice, Y/n. Really good.”

You muttered under your breath and secured your gun. As you licked your dry lips, you felt a metallic taste and then realized that Kuroda's blood had splattered on your face. You grimaced and pulled a tissue from your pocket to clean yourself.

Sanzu started searching the dead man's pockets and after a while he pulled out his phone and a small notebook. He tried to unlock the device but failed.

“Try his fingerprints.” You crouched down next to him and grabbed one of Akira's hands.

This time the phone was unlocked and Sanzu immediately changed the security settings so that the man's fingers wouldn't have to be cut off.

“Do you think he was telling the truth? That about Nagano and Sugiyama?” You asked, examining your companion for any wounds.

"Yes. I don't think this dick was lying. Nagano was a nobody and your ex’s hubby was a much more formidable character than even Akira.” Sanzu replied to you while looking through the victim's phone. “Interesting, interesting...”

You found a larger bloodstain on the pink-haired man's collar and pulled the fabric aside. Clean, no wounds. You're relieved.

"I'm fine." Sanzu said calmly, getting up from his crouch and putting the finds into the pocket of his own suit. “Let's go, Y/n. There's nothing for us here."

“Don't ever chase someone again while they're still firing... Please.” You said, calmly following the man.

“That's why you're there to defend me, L/n.” He replied to you, and you bit the inside of your cheek lightly.

Just before the door, Sanzu stopped and turned to face you. He looked at you for a moment before gesturing with his finger for you to come closer. You did it obediently and the corner of his mouth turned up slightly.

“I like it when you worry about me like that, you know Y/n?” He said quietly and grabbed your tie, pulling you closer to him.

You tried to look into his eyes, but they moved down your face to stop at your lips. Your heart skipped a beat as Haruchiyo brought his face closer to yours and his hot breath fanned across your cheek. You turned your head slightly and the tip of your nose brushed lightly against his cheek.

“I love it when you follow me like an obedient dog.” His tone was playful, but you knew he was telling the truth. Your lips connected for a brief moment, but it was enough to make the blood rush in your head. “Let's go. I'm curious about the others.”

Sanzu moved away from you, letting go of your tie and you followed him again.

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x y/n #male reader #tokyo revengers haruchiyo sanzu #haruchiyo sanzu #haruchiyo sanzu x reader

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nightylantern · 4 months

Text

Gojo x reader; A nightmare that couldn’t hope to exist again

So I uh saw the newest leaks on jjk, and I wanted to be heavily comforted as I don’t know how to feel about it. Don’t worry this doesn’t contain the leaks, this is a what if scenario (info down below)

Here’s just some comfort as a what if, what if maybe after everything they somehow revive Gojo? I mean this Gojo right? He’s not a regular sorcerer…right? This is honestly to comfort me, don’t come at me if he’s truly truly gone.

Tw: Nightmares, fluff, Au of post canon where everything is saved and all, because I don’t know how the ending will go yet, ptsd, SPOILERS LIKE HUUUGE-

Poke poke

…

poke poke poke

…

poke poke poke po-

“ALRIGHT, I’m up I’m yawn, up, wha- OW!” His waist was still sensitive as heck, no wonder, he was slash- no, SPLIT, literally. Gojo groans as he blears out from his sleepiness due to the insistent poking, the poking who he assumes is coming from you, “listen I know you want me up but could you turn on the lamp? It would be easier to se- yelp agh…shoulda warned me, gosh my eyes… rub rub I hope it’s not to early, otherwise I won’t be able to sleep” he continues to ramble out of sleep for a bit and turns to you, or more surprisingly, your back.

Now that he thinks about it you haven’t done or said anything, minus the poking of course. “Hello…? Uh your awakened husband is here, seriously you can’t just poke me awake as I’m recovering from, well I dunno…MY BODY SPLITTING IN HALF and just remain in the edge all quiet and everything.” He tried to sound playful but you didn’t move, it was almost like you didn’t hear him, and suddenly he felt chills.

What if maybe…he was still out there, rotting in half? What if he left you behind..? What if what if what if-

He didn’t realise he reached out for you unconsciously until he felt the warmth of your skin and you turned your head slowly, not enough for him to see your face but well…enough for him to know you acknowledged his presence, he runs his fingers up and down your back “hey, uh, you okay? You woke me up and yet you seem so…distant and odd, love you know I’m here right?” He hesitated before holding your shoulder, where he felt the trembling and realised why you weren’t facing him, why you were so quiet. You turned around facing him which confirmed it, you were crying. With this knowledge he wasted no time in sitting up at the headboard despite his waist screaming otherwise and trying to situate you in his lap, which came along with your protests;

“Satorou! No I can’t…it’s still healing!”

“It’s fine, it’s fine, I’m alive and it’s not like it’s gonna fall off.”

“It’s still healing, what if it gets infected due to a blood clot or something! Satorou I can’t, even if you claim it’s okay I won’t be okay…so please..”

The fear and helplessness is your voice is what got him to stop, so, rather than you sitting on his lap he had you both lie down and cuddle up to each other, making sure you were comfy while also proving he was comfortable aswell. He kept kissing your face, wherever his lips could touch as a gesture of comfort, he wanted you to feel, to know he was here, and he also wanted to know that he was here. He kept you against him while running his fingers up and down like earlier in a comforting manner, hoping to soothe you.

“…so, my scrumptious little dollop of happiness, love a-“ “Satorou don't you dare,” you interrupted with a giggle, both cringing and giggling at the super long phrase he tried to give you “haha! Just wanted to make you laugh, or atleast a it happier darling. Seeing that you giggled I had done an amazing job, right sweetheart?” He said as he kissed your cheeks, to which you giggled.

“Seeing that my first job is done, we are moving to the second job!” He said as his voice toned down slightly, “and that is finding out why you were crying when I woke up, my lovely spouse here shouldn’t be crying as I was sleeping, oh do tell me if it was the snoring, wait that explains as to why you were poking me aggressively!” He said dramatically to which you chuckled “no no Satorou, I’m sorry I woke you up, I just…I had a horrible nightmare about…about you and I thought you were…let’s just say I needed you, I needed you talking to me, touching me, I mean the warmth is enough but you sleeping, considering how your body has been…I just needed to see you alive” You mumbled the last part out quieter but he caught it. He didn’t know that his sleeping was THAT bad, he was told by Shoko that he slept like a dead man, but to make his one and only think that too? It broke his heart seeing you crying because of him, because he looked dead, and while you trailed off he had a good idea as to what you might have dreamed about, sure you weren’t out there but you knew the contents of his…death. Hmm…

”Is that so darling? Hm…what to do, this is rather a pickle isn’t it? Well as much as I would love to say that everything will be okay…I can’t confirm it considering the situation is still unknown,” he murmured while stroking your hair, you tensed against him as you knew this, but didn’t want to hear it. “However, Yuji and Shoko both are on my case, they refuse to leave me alone, and are basically forcing me into temporary leave, heck maybe considering my condition they will force me to retire all together,” he said with a joking tone which made you smirk. “I don’t know what will happen, for despite my amazing capabilities I cannot tell the future, if I could I wouldn’t have been split in half now would I? Hey…no I meant is as a joke, no I’m sorry I didn’t mean to dampen the mood..” he said upon realising you were tensing, fretting over his words,”damn it…I really suck with comforting don-“ “yes,”you deadpanned.

“…haha, did you really need to call me out?” He said awkwardly, when he got no reply he just continued running his hand up and down your back, the atmosphere eventually got comforting. The night was quiet, minus the ticking of the clock, and the wind outside, it was cozy and warm, safety was guaranteed, yet your trembling had yet to cease, he was about to speak up again when you interrupted him,

“I always hated your cockiness you know?” He looked down at you, “I hated how you always assumed you would win due to your abilities, it was because of that, that you became reckless and lazy, and even when fighting against a formidable enemy you still remained confident no? How do you think I felt in regards to that?” Gojo wasn’t stupid or deaf, you would always complain about his recklessness and how he could die, to which he would always brush off, one day it even lead in a fully fledged argument between you both, which lasted for days on end until you both broke the silence, realising that it wasn’t healthy for either of you to continue with this silence since you both had issues taking care of yourselves. That’s not to say your worries ceased, nor his cockiness, but he promised to be more careful, and well…he was cut in half. “I knew you know? I knew that the jobs were dnagerous and I knew you weren’t guaranteed a happy ending or anything, especially with your cockiness and all,” happy ending? Damn you had unique phrases didn’t you.

“I hate you so much, I hate you for making me worry! I hate you for dying! I hate you for making me grieve and mourn!” You kept crying over and over and letting your resentment be known until “I hate myself for being weak, for being unable to protect you…” Gojo froze at that, while he was aware of your worries, he wasn’t aware of how it affected the image you projected onto yourself, the fact that you couldn’t help him on the field, the fact that he surpassed you miles ahead, and the fact that he basically died. He thought about it for a moment before finally speaking up:

“I won’t lie to you, I haven’t necessarily been thinking about your needs on the field, or in general despite the fact that I love you. Getting stronger, teaching my students and defeating curses were mainly on my mind. For that, I am really sorry…but that doesn’t mean I loved you any less. If anything I’m at fault for not taking you into consideration, because the last thing I want to do is break my dearest spouses heart. Now that everything has changed, if there are curses they are most likely not strong, something I could take out within minutes, seconds even…hey dont give me that look, I’m not being cocky.” He trembled under your glare..

“Okay, maybe I’m being a little cocky, but that isn’t my point. The point is, the curses are weakened drastically and if that’s not the case then they are gone for good. Regardless of the outcome we don’t have to worry about danger, for we both are capable enough to defend ourselves, you with your self defence and me with my abilities. Don’t you see what this means?” He wiped the stains off your cheeks. “Just because everything is over doesn’t mean the pain and suffering will go away immediately, heck maybe never, I know Yuji will be unstable for a while, but that isn’t all there is. I’m not young, but I’m not old either, same with you. We still have a life to lead you know?” He pulled you against his chest while smiling, a soft smile reserved for his closest ones, like you. “So let’s live with happiness moving forward. Whenever you suffer I’ll be there to support you, just as I expect you to do the same. Let us live our lives to the fullest, like a normal married couple, it is my job as your husband to make you the happiest person alive no?” He murmured softly. You listened intently while resting against his chest, and then you spoke up:

“Can you at least promise me that you will remain safe moving forward? That you will take care of yourself?” You asked, looking at him expectantly, to which he hesitated a bit, to which you spoke up once again, “you said it yourself, there are no more major threats with the curses, so you shouldn’t be out there fighting and returning home all banged up, so it’s impossible for you to be able to break said promise…unless you plan to pull something?” You eyed him suspiciously to which he spoke up quickly,” NO! I uh…I mean no, I wouldn’t dare, and your right about the curses…so yes, I promise that I won’t ever put myself in danger recklessly ever again, and that I will make sure I return to you, in one piece, not two- OW!” He winced at your smack, however you were satisfied, and with that you snuggled up to him. A comfortable silence ensued again, until you asked one last question:

“Satorou…you said we would have a future of happiness earlier…what future do you envision when thinking of that? I mean I can’t expect life to be simple for you after everything that’s occurred…” He was silent for a long time, until he replied, “honestly I don’t know, I just tend to dream about your happy face, and me being by your side, touching you, kissing you, loving you, and living a happy life with each other, heck maybe even with a child,” he smiled at the thought.

“…then let’s make it come true.” You finalised, to which he looked down raising an eyebrow. “Let’s make your dream come true, for that is now my dream as-well! A dream like that…is a thousand times better than the nightmares.” You said with sparkling eyes, the first genuine emotion of happiness you showed that night.

He smiled, but didn’t say anything, he didn’t need to, for all his words could be felt with his eyes, hands and body. He wanted nothing more then to secure that future, and so he squeezed you a bit tighter, to which you reciprocated, and just like that, both you and him dreamed.

He dreamed of you, your smiling face, your laughter, your iconic glaring face, you scolding him, and just living a happy life.

You dreamed of him, his smiling, his laughter, his face when he is trying to hide from your scolding. A happy life with a happy man, and even a glimpse of a child, a child you desired to have with him.

You both didn’t know if the world would even be safe, and knew that a “happily ever after” was near impossible for sorcerers or those within the circle, especially with someone like Gojo who had been different from the other sorcerers. However the world had changed for the better, you both knew that, so maybe, just maybe, his ending that intertwined with yours, and continues intertwining, could change too. However all you could do was dream in the meantime.

Nightmares became less common after that night.

*Credits to the amazing manga of JJK, also GOJO PLEASE COMEBACK ALIVE* *I hope you enjoyed! Mind you I’m not into JJK as a whole so I don’t understand the lore, please correct me if I do get things wrong!Also IM ALMOST DONE WITH SCHOOL AND FINALS AAAAA*

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itsnotmourn · 3 months

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can i be so real

your Carmen/Richard art makes me feel guilty /POS POSPOSPSOPSOPSOPSOPS SLASH POSITIVE. in a GOOD WAY i sWEAR

very very quick context, i have an oc i ship with richard but not in a cool polyamory way in a cheating way, and in this.. oc-universe?? i interpret Carmen/Richard as a not healthy marriage

aND SEEING YOUR ART OF THEM BEING FCKING ADORABLE makes me!? hauehUHAU IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD HEUBGHFBNJ

your art is very pretty and so nice i lowkey consider it like... canon? like theres no conformation of their relationship at all, but bc of your art i just consider them this adorable rich couple

and

off to the side i hold my cheating angst behind my back

sorry about the rant this is something i think is funny and that i mean as a very high compliment

LMAO ??

mm whatever people do with their OC/CC ship and/or their au with Carmen/Richard is up to them; anything that doesn't quite fit my cup of tea would just be looked away (or muted/blocked if it's really horrific content) so i got no comment on that :>

though! for your second point, i will say that: unless you consider material (doodles, pelo's words) outside of the episodes as NOT canon, there is somewhat a confirmation that Carmen and Richard are in a good relationship, if that’s what you mean !!

just for quick examples of such if you're curious:

Richard calls her Darling frequently

[ source + twitch stream but audio used here ]

during a discord qna, when asked if Carmen and Richard even loved each other or if they would ever get a divorce, Pelo said “they love each other...” but it could be argued that he is trolling (personal note: when i started posting art, he commented positively a few times on my ship art of them so if he IS lying about their love, i'm throwing so many hands at him /silly)

he draws them with love like look at that jesus CRHIST love is real

[ source ]

and others but it’s more-so speculation rather than outright confirmation

so yeah, via episode only, their relationship is a mystery and all that is canon is that their parental philosophy and attitudes towards people of a lower status is REALLY ass lol.

glad to hear that my art made you think more positively of them though; i'm always pleased when my art makes other people like them a bit more !! <:3c

#sorry to yap lol #there’s always a few discussions that could be made about them #[ the askbox mourns ]#[ mourn's mourns ]#spooky month carmen #spooky month richard #carmen x richard

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scruffyssketchbook · 1 month

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ART TIME ART TIME! I have a buncha fanart piled up, so I decided to submit the miscellaneous ones first as I have a silly idea for the other ones. This is all mostly test art, so excuse any weird parts of it jaja. By the way, this art is from before most of the redesigns were shown, which is why Flame is a hideous man in these slash positive.

Sorry for not putting this as a submission by the way, wouldn't let me post multiple pictures, hope that's alright. I wanted to post more art here too since the quality on instagram isn't great.

Silly idea here; I've decided that I'll post the other art after my test results in around two weeks time and the post will show how well I did. If it's mostly snowangel, that means it went well, JAJAJA. HOWEVER, if it did not go so well, I will post the cringe Vay and Blizz edgy comic instead lol. Hope this is cool, just a fun idea I had. Hope you're doing well Scruffy, and I hope all the readers are good too. Stay safe, my dudes!

ALL OF YOUR ART IS ALWAYS SO GOOD BRO!!! I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW THE CHARACTERS!!!! GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR TEST RESULTS!!!!

(Also Flame is always a hideous man/pos, don’t worry LOL)

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beemers-hell · 11 months

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hey I need you to know that I've seen your art all over the place and your tricky design HEAVILY inspired my transfem tricky headcanon + design. there's something about a bigender he/she clown that just makes sense to me. so thank you very much for that I literally love how you draw tricky

you will make me cry i swear to God WAUA8SHAUHAHA

#beemer asks #i get the biggest confidence boost whenever someone says “my tricky design was inspired by beemers!”#its stupid but it means a lot to me ughhhh #also ik my tricky isnt transfem but god i love all the transfem trickys out there #god bless everyone whos based as fuck n makes tricky a she/her user #clown no caare we fuckin ball #slash pos

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cyberdragoninfinity · 8 months

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I want to hear about your Postcanon Primo Aporia AU with the twins 👁️👁️

BATTING MY EYELASHES... ABSOLUTELY TOUCHED AND HONORED when folks are interested in the bonkers little AUs im always cooking up..thank you ;_; this one especially is rly dear to me, it's starting to grow into quite the, Project. slash pos

here's some notes and rambles about what the fuck's going on in my 5Ds Postcanon Au That's Grown Deeply Out of Hand/Rinascita AU/if i ever write something about it will give it a proper name BUT

"Rinascita" is Italian for 'rebirth' or 'revival'.... "Primo Rinascita" (name I've been calling this AU's Primoporia) plays off of "Primo Reprisa" (Primo Recovery/post ripped in half rebuilt Primo) :^)

the tl;dr I've touched upon with this AU is it's really just born from "what if Leo tried to salvage some of Aporia's mechanisms to bring him back after all the Ark Cradle chaos, but the hardware is so damaged only a third of it can be rebooted, so now Primo has to be alive again whether he wants to be or not"...there's a couple other defining Canon Divergences in here too though!!

Namely the twins elect to Stay in New Domino with Yusei rather than go live with their parents like they do in canon, partially because of the Secret Robot Harddrive(s) Leo has been sitting on for the last six months, and also partially because Fuck the Twins' Parents All My Homies Hate the Twin's Parents THEY ALREADY GOT A DAD!!! HIS NAME IS YUSEI FUDO!!!!

(but also Akiza drops out of medical school to come back to NDC and really buckle down on pursuing turbo dueling professionally... good god let the girl RIDE A MOTORCYCLE!)

Anyway, Primo in this AU is.. Mostly Primo but yeah he is also Aporia too, he has all of Aporia's memories (and fainter, more dreamlike recollections of Lester and Jakob's memories) and for a solid while Leo especially Treats him Like Aporia Primarily, which makes Primo EXTREMELY agitated!! What do you do when your memories both are yours and aren't yours, what do you do when you're a copy of a copy of a copy, what do you do the things 'you've' done are making you feel a whole lot different towards the people you so violently tried to destroy when you were last alive and it's making you feel WEIRD!!!!

he's just going through it. a lot. He has no mission he has no god he was supposed to be able to REST. and now Team 5D's is letting him stay in their garage like some kind of charity case!!

Primo eventually gets uploaded into a Ghost body Yusei and the twins recovered from a Satellite dump (it sucks <3 one eye doesnt work <333) but I think he can also partially exist in some other technology (possibly Leo's Duel Disc and the Yusei Go.... Aporia really did just like throw his whole halo into Yusei's bike and granted it flight there is DEFINITELY Apo Data in that thing's system.)

"You remember how in Homestuck, um, Bec Noir had that instinct to always protect Jade because he was partially her dog?? That's Primo in this AU, with the twins." The Aporia in him's protective instinct is logged the fuck IN

god there's just. A Lot. it's all fun and games until the little AU suddenly has a timeline and themes and. duels. and related OCs. I need to draw them but there's a small faction of scrappers that specialize in recovering the 258939285 stupidass Ghost robots Primo unleashed on the city and getting all the good tech and metal outta them. They'd like to get the tech and metal outta Primo too :)

really it's this sort of character study AU about what happens when a living weapon is allowed true and real free will, whatit means to really be a person, and about Primo coming to terms with this chance to be who He wants to be, not simply what he was created to be, and this nature of who he is vs. who Aporia was vs. who exists at the overlap of those points. Aporia may be dead but he is haunting that fuckin narrativeee his claws are all over everythinggg and it's giving Primo Gender Feelings that he DOESNT HAVE TIME TO FOCUS ON RIGHT NOW!!!! *the looming Postcanon Gender He/They Experience lurks behind him like a phantom*

there was even slowburn yuseiprimo qpr maneuvers. smiles.

LORD THAT'S A LOT SORRY and that's really just me sputtering some basic stuff off the top of my head...there is. a Lot going on. Didnt even get into the guardian angel symbolism and how Z-one slots into all this and the. um. entire fan duel monsters card archetype im cooking for Luna out in this thing. tl;dr This Rehabilitated Pit Bull Has a New Lease on Life and It's Stressing Them The Fuck Out But They'll Be Ok.i believe in Primo's innate big brother instinct and you can too. i like him SOO MUCH

#SOO DELIGHTED TO FINALLY BE ABLE TO TALK MORE ABOUT HIM PUBLICLY theres. so much going on #i didnt even get into the 65 year old butch who wants primo dead #asks #anonymous #lavenderr-starrs #rinascita au #primo 5ds #ygo posting #placido #ygoart #long post /

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andro526484339 · 6 months

Text

the androverse plot condensed for the tumblings

phan and carter are assigned to work together on a mission as a temporary pair of partners after their performances as agents has been declining (Phan is essentially an assassin and Carter is a run of the mill secret agent espionage type). kind of like a challenge of work together and do good or get bent

their goal is to dig up the true identity of an anonymous journalist and orders will continue as more factoids are uncovered. however after like 30% of the story has gone by carter is unfortunate to find out that that journalist is in fact her ex of like eight years that she's never gotten over. she pleads with phan not to kill her but she doesn't gaf. either way it doesn't happen because it just so happens that eloise has some juicy details specifically about something government related that phans father (who killed himself forever ago) was involved in. the three of them end up in an uneasy alliance that gets cut short because surprise surprise eloise is in fact killed by a different agent and they figured out what was going on

now phan is given a sort of ultimatum. carter is taken and used as a piece of bait to get phans ass over to where BRANNIGAN is at. brannigan is phans boss slash mentor slash strange maternal figure slash freudian attachment and she took in a teenage phan and groomed her to be the perfect agent. that's all that's relevant anyway she tells phan that if she shoots carter (who she sees as the root cause of this and is currently tied on a chair) she'll scrub this all from her record it'll be fine. but phan shoots brannigan instead. and now she's dead. whoops.

so now the two of them are essentially on the run from the agency trying to get their asses. carter is looking to find who killed eloise and phan is looking to find the doctor who oversaw the experimentation that her father was involved in. that was what eloise was digging up for the record and part of why phan killed brannigan as she came to realize that this was being hid from her all this time. the genetic experimentation plot is metal gear shit and it's in a world where mapping the human genome came in the 80s. phan is partly affected by it by it being something inheritable and this is part of why they kept an eye on her. technology has really advanced huh

Anyway as they continue on their journey phan is getting gradually more sick it turns out she has some insane form of cancer caused by her unstable cellular structure that has decided to onset now that she is without the regular checkups. her father killed himself because of a similar thing. now finding the doctor is a lot more imperative

ok that's enough you get the gist. carter does end up killing eloises killer which doesn't get her much of anywhere and the two of them kind of drag the doctor around on a leash. anyway they both end up killing themselves at the end cause yeah they're both pos and should die anyway. cause everything in this is motivated by purely selfish means

also phan and carters relationship timeline is a whole other beast. I could explain all of the reasons why they started finagling with each other but that would be different from plot now wouldn't it. their first time is after phan gets shot in the leg and carter helps take care of her and they start to see each other as equal partners who can be somewjat vulnerable around each other

#no quarter given

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hermanunworthy · 10 months

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Hi, there, Siren, hope you're doing well! If you're still taking dndads ship requests, how about maybe 35 for Cheerkicks/Oakli (not entirely sure on the name here, but. Link and Normal. You get it), please? Feeling in a silly rarepair mood today hehe 💚💚💚

Bullet Holes and Acne Scars (and Other Wounds to Heal)

35. kissing their bruises and scars

from the touch prompts list!

I WAITED A MONTH TO START ON THIS HELP 😭 trust me though ive been so excited about this one, oakicks makes me ill /pos (and also im glad i waited bc i got to use the latest episode as context for this scene!)

cw: violence (including gun violence), blood and injury

also on ao3!

Normal never would’ve taken Lincoln as a fighter, at first.

Ever since they were young, Lincoln has been timid, uptight, the type to go rigid if you get too close to him. Or maybe that’s just in Normal’s case. They’re working on it, though. He thinks. He hopes.

He never would've thought that the sweet kid he used to see kicking rocks in the corner or a soccer ball on a field would one day be kicking FBI agents and military soldiers on the battlefield. With the force of a beast.

Normal thinks he understands, now, why Lincoln’s dads tried to shelter their son so much.

But he also thinks he understands, as he’s too distracted looking at Lincoln to succeed at the spell he’s currently casting, the way he feels. He may not understand what it’s like to be unconditionally loved by his parents (something that arouses a deeply-rooted feeling of envy in him towards his friend, but that’s another thing he’s working on), but he understands what it’s like to feel pressured by his parents. And he thinks, in their own loving way, Lincoln’s dads have pressured him too much. And this is his release. His rebellion. Like a caged animal set free.

And Normal does believe he deserves this. However. It also concerns him greatly.

Because the paladin is moving so quickly, so aggressively, and the cleric is barely able to even keep an eye on him but it sounds like he's breathing heavily and at one point he thinks he catches a glimmer of something in his eye. And it all keeps distracting him from helping out in the battle himself.

Normal just narrowly avoids another incoming attack. Focus, Normal, fucking focus! He shakes his head, his heart pounding irregularly in his chest, trying to pay attention to anything other than Lincoln, Lincoln, is Lincoln okay—

“Norm!” Scary’s voice calls from a ways away, blasting a fireball directly into a man’s face. “Taylor could use your help!”

“No, I—!” Taylor immediately snaps back from where he stands off, holding a soldier back with their weapons clashed. “Uh, I mean… Yeah! Normie! We need you!”

Normal leaps straight into action, fueled by his friends’ words and ready to defend them, but realizes while he’s charging his spell just what’s going on. Something burns within him, something that has settled deep within his veins and has been repeatedly threatening to burst through these days. Do you really need my help, or do you just want to feel better about being such a dick to me lately?

His spell fizzles out in failure again, and he clutches his head and growls to himself. Lincoln, get out of my damn head!

“Norm— Augh!” Scary, in her distraction, takes a blunt melee attack to the head, knocking her down.

Taylor swivels around with a slash to his opponent to face Scary’s assailant. “What the hell?!” He jabs his sword toward the FBI agent. “Normal! What’s with the weaksauce spells?”

The blood is roaring in Normal’s ears so loudly that he can't even hear himself stuttering. He dizzily looks between Scary on the ground, Taylor standing off against the agent, and Lincoln, off in the distance, surrounded by soldiers. He's paralyzed. His lungs feel compressed tightly in his chest, and not even the strong emotion shooting through his blood is enough to awaken any magic.

Scary, thank the metaphorical heavens and not the godawful place they all visited earlier, manages to make it back onto her feet, but not without great effort. “You're—” She coughs. “You're good, Norm, you're good.”

The squeezing feeling in Normal’s chest somehow worsens. Stop it, don't say that. Why am I even here? I'm no help at all!

He stumbles backwards, and his back bumps into somebody. Before he can turn around to face them, a pair of burly arms are slung around his neck. Already short of breath, the cleric is easy to choke out, and his hands fly up to scratch at their sleeves. Panicking, he looks to Taylor, the closest nearby person, and cries out, “Help!”

Without a moment’s hesitation, Taylor drops what he’s doing and, like a true hero, blindly sprints over to slice the back of Normal’s attacker. The arms release him from the chokehold, and he falls to the ground, heaving for air.

But he isn't able to recover for long, because somebody is yanking him back up by his collar. He braces himself this time, but finds himself face-to-face with Taylor. His expression is twisted in anger, the way he looked at him the last time they argued.

“What the fuck was that, dude?! You can't even use a spell to help me, but you can use me to help you?” He shoves him, nearly toppling him back to the ground.

He… I used a Command on Taylor, didn't I? He didn't even realize. It was just instinct, of course he wouldn't just use his friend like that…

You only ever want to help yourself, a familiar voice scolds him in his head.

“Taylor, quit it, he’s already been…!” Scary is beginning to argue with him now, but Normal can't even pay attention to that anymore.

Lincoln is now fighting Agent Shmegan.

The man is trying to resist his attacks, shielding his body with his arms and trying to talk to him, but the paladin will not let up. “Kid, if you could just— You're making this harder than it needs to be, we just want—”

“I don't care what you want!” Lincoln roars, the first words Normal has heard him say during this entire fight. “I'm not going to listen to you anymore! I hate you adults! Fuck you!” He kicks him again, and again, and he's starting to lose his momentum with each swing but he refuses to give up. “Fuck you! Fuck you!”

Normal knows Lincoln has a history with this man, but he also can tell that this is not just about him and Taylor’s kidnapping.

“Li-Wilson— Please just get a hold of yourself and your friends—” Schmegan orders through grunts of pain. Normal knows Lincoln has been training hard to perfect his soccer kicks, so that can't feel good to take.

“Shut up! That’s Mr. Kicks to you!” The soccer player utilizes a swift kick to the crotch as emphasis.

While the FBI agent is finally doubled over in pain, unable to make any more demands, Lincoln’s body heaves with effort. He looks like he’s preparing another kick, but he’s cut short when a loud gunshot fires out, and he stumbles backwards.

“Link!” Normal shrieks, his body finally allowing him to move again, and he dives over to where his friend has fallen. As he gets close, it becomes apparent to him that Lincoln is crying, and he’s crying hard.

“Sir, let's get out of here.” Another agent, holding the gun used to shoot Lincoln, rushes over to Shmegan’s aid, helping him to lean on his shoulder and escort him back to their helicopter. “Freeman kept us from capturing the King, but we have him and his buddies as hostages for later. We need to retreat for now.”

Shmegan’s face contorts in pain and anger. “That better include Wilson. I have some words for that man about his son.”

The other agent chuckles wryly. “Oh, yes, sir. He’s been incapacitated since the fight began.” He looks down at where Lincoln sits, with no sense of remorse. “Seems we’re not the only ones disturbed by that kid’s violence.”

Normal is crouched by Lincoln’s side, trembling just as bad as he is. “Link, it’s Normal. Normal’s here.” God, that must be the least comforting thing he could hear right now. He must be the last person he wants to help him.

Normal’s hands are on Lincoln’s hands. Lincoln’s hands are on his knee. Lincoln’s blood is on his hands, on his knee, on his clothes, on the ground…

“Dad,” Lincoln sobs weakly. “Dad.”

All of Lincoln’s fight has left him. Now he’s just a scared, powerless little kid.

And so is Normal, now that he’s drained of magic. He can't cast any more spells. He used the last one to help himself. He can't heal his friend. And dear god, Lincoln’s still crying for his dad. But Grant has been captured. And so have the rest of their dads, it sounds.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck!

He presses down harder on the wound, but he can't tell if it’s even helping to stop the bleeding, or if it’s just him trying to squeeze Lincoln’s hands to help himself calm down. God fucking damn it, I'm so selfish, even as my friend is sitting here with an actual bullet wound… Can’t do shit for him…

He dares to look back up at Lincoln’s face, and finds it even worse to look at than all the blood. His eyes are scrunched up, leaking a river of tears down his face, his lips quivering with each shaking breath. It reminds him of when he got to see this boy as a baby, and how he promised him that it was going to be alright. He has to make this alright again, if it’s the last thing he does.

With one hand still pressing against his knee, Normal uses the other one to carefully lean forward and stroke his cheek again, wiping away some of his tears.

Lincoln opens his eyes, and when they meet Normal’s it’s clear that they are bloodshot and unfocused. “D-Dad…” he still whimpers. “Help…”

It hurts, knowing that he doesn't want Normal, but he tries to put himself in his shoes. What would I want from my dad, if I were him?

He knows Grant wouldn't know any healing spells. But he does know that he was very tender and affectionate with his son. He seems like he’s very gentle in how he cares for him, like he feels like his own dad has the potential to be.

He knows what he wanted his dad to do for him when he got hurt when he was younger. Grant seems like the type to care unconditionally, though. So, unlike his own dad, he ignores the disturbing and gross nature of this situation, and with all the love (and lack of magic) in his heart, he presses his lips lovingly against Lincoln’s knee as if it was simply the scraped knee of a child.

Lincoln gasps at the feeling, and Normal instantly regrets it, feeling like an utter idiot, He has an literal hole in his knee, I can't just kiss it better, this must be hurting him so bad—

“Normal,” Lincoln chokes at last. He grabs one of his friend’s hands and squeezes it with enough strength to break him. “Normal.”

The cleric lets out a squeak from the strong grip, but watches as a golden light begins to slowly, slowly glow from underneath the paladin’s other hand, which is still on his knee. He’s casting Lay on Hands on himself. Oh, Normal didn't even think about the fact that Lincoln hasn't been using any magic, so he probably could've…

But no, Lincoln wasn't able to help himself before, was he? It wasn't until Normal kissed him that that something in his eyes cleared, like a fog being lifted. Did Normal actually help? Or is he just being selfish, just taking credit for something that had nothing to do with—

“Thank you, Normal,” Lincoln breathes. The words he’s been wanting to hear all this time. Normal’s heart squeezes at the sound.

“Did you…” Normal’s own voice feels thick in his throat, and he realized just then that he has tears dripping down his face as well. “Did you even realize what you were doing? How hard you were fighting?”

More tears begin to roll down Lincoln’s cheeks. “It… There was no pain… At first… Only anger…”

He squeezes his friend’s hand back, but it’s not nearly as strong. Not as strong as Lincoln, never. “I was so worried, it felt like losing you…”

Lincoln’s face crumples again, and Normal can hardly bear to look at it. “Normal…”

His eyes wander over Lincoln’s body, realizing that there are other spots of blood not just from the gunshot. All sorts of cuts and bruises, all of which look very painful, but Lincoln hasn't acknowledged any of them. That “zone” that he seems to get into, that rush of adrenaline, that thrill of violence, must be a very, very dangerous place for him to be in. He never wants to lose his friend to that darkness again.

So he shows him the light. He leans in close to each wound, trailing the gentlest of kisses over the dark spots on his legs and the nasty gashes on his arms, never once shying away from the blood or the hair or the sweat or the filth because it's all normal to him, and even though he knows it's selfish to give Lincoln what he wants for himself, he wants to love Lincoln like he’s perfectly new.

“Normal,” is all Lincoln can say now, through his continued crying. “Normal, Normal…” The way he’s whimpering his name, like a prayer upon his lips, only fuels him further, the way it feels to have replenished magic surging through his veins.

It isn't until he gets tugged away by his hair that he realizes he should probably stop. But Lincoln's hand doesn’t move from the back of his head, and when he looks up at him, Lincoln just stares back, his pupils wide. “Normal,” he whispers again.

Lincoln’s gaze is roaming over his face, and especially over the blood drying on his mouth. Normal can taste it, he realizes self-consciously.

“How can you still be so nice to me?” His eyes shine with a horrible, heart-wrenching guilt, a guilt that Normal can feel himself as he fights the overwhelming need to kiss the one little cut that he missed, the one he’s been avoiding, because he knows it would be too selfish of him.

The one on his lip.

“I'm… so sorry.” Lincoln’s fingers loosen in his hair, but Normal still leans his head into his hand before he can decide to let go entirely. “For how I've… I've been so…”

“It's okay, Link,” Normal murmurs, even though he doesn't know if it's true. It’s just hard to focus on the long-term pain this boy has caused him when said boy is caressing the back of his neck so delicately that it makes him melt.

“No. You're my friend. You're my husband.” The certainty with which he says it brings Normal a shiver. “I need to make it up to you.”

This time, Lincoln is the one leaning forward. Normal freezes up, his face flushing red as his husband’s lips land on his cheek.

But Normal doesn't understand. He doesn't need healing, he doesn't have any scars. Not on the outside, anyway.

Is he… kissing my tears away?

Another kiss. And another. Each touch of his lips to his face leaves him with a feeling of warmth and light. Lincoln even reaches with his bloody hands to brush the sweaty hair sticking to Normal’s skin out of the way, and begins to leave kisses on his forehead as well.

Oh. He’s kissing his acne scars.

More tears run down where Lincoln has kissed. Nobody has ever… He's always been told that he's gross, that his acne is a problem, something to be ashamed of. He has spent countless hours staring at himself in the mirror, popping pimples and picking at scabs (despite his sister’s warnings), wondering why he has to look like this and if anyone could ever love him like this. His parents would never do something like this for him.

But Lincoln is. Lincoln, the one he’s been trying to win over for years. Lincoln, the kid he always wanted to play with but wasn't allowed to. Lincoln, the friend who always seemed to shut him down no matter how hard he tried to love him. That same guy is here, sitting on the ground in literal Hell, a bullet in his knee and blood on his clothes, his fingers curling in his greasy hair and his lips kissing his pockmarked face.

“I'm sorry,” Lincoln whispers tearfully against his skin. “Thank you for… for being my friend. For being you.”

As he pulls back, Normal pushes forward, resting his forehead against Lincoln’s. “I love you,” he sighs, selfishly but honestly. He hopes it brings Lincoln as much catharsis as it does him.

Lincoln glances up from where his eyes sat downcast at the blood on the ground, to stare into his husband’s eyes. His hand on Normal’s neck drifts to his jaw. Eyes still glittering sadly, he offers a smile, but the stretching of his lips opens his cut and makes him wince away in pain.

Normal reaches forward with a careful hand, and catches Lincoln’s chin. He really hopes this isn't going too far, too fast, too bold, like he always seems to be going without realizing it. “Let me…?” He can't even finish the question, can't bear another rejection.

But Lincoln beats him to it, kisses him first, kisses him better. Cradles him with such love and care that you’d think he’s the one being nursed back to health.

And it is undoubtedly healing. Something Normal has needed for a long time. Something that tastes like blood and grime and filth, something that tastes so normal and familiar that it feels like coming home. Feels like being blessed by an angel visiting Hell.

After all, Normal always thought Lincoln was more of a lover than a fighter.

#oakicks #cheerkicks #normal oak #lincoln li wilson #dndads #dndads fanfic #dndads fic #my fic #touch prompts

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genderqueeradrien · 1 year

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ADRIEN AGRESTE BPD CODED? explain pls <- going O.O slash pos

ok so !!! this turned into an ESSAY i'm so sorry i've been thinking about this for ages and haven't put my thoughts on paper together yet so this is me doing that. also disclaimer irl at least in the us people usually cant get diagnosed with bpd until theyre atbut this is a french kid's show about magic superheroes so i'm ignoring a bit of real-world logistics for the sake of analysis. also, i'm starting with things that ARENT kuro neko specific but trust me we'll get to her.

warning: really long post. actual warning: there's mentions of self harm, talk of suicide and metaphorical suicide, and some discussion of canonical abuse + coping mechanisms. generally lots of mental illness stuff

(also in case the readmore breaks at some point im putting this here bc i want to have it saved Somewhere)

ALL THAT BEING SAID!

[blank paragraph in case the readmore eats the first paragraph. i love this website]

some bpd symptoms i see in adrien/chat noir:

identity disturbance, markedly/persistently unstable self-image/sense of self: there's been several times here adrien talks about wondering whether adrien or chat noir is his "true self," which is super interesting to me bc i (dissociative disorder haver) used to angst about that exact thing (though his situation is definitely different on account of being a superhero lol). there's also the fact that he doesn't have any idea who he is or what he wants to do with his future, and his mind goes blank whenever he thinks about it, which aligns with the difficulties in committing to goals/jobs often seen in bpd

potentially self-damaging impulsive behavior: he's always sacrificing himself for ladybug- here's 2 minutes straight of him doing it in timebreaker, dark cupid, zombizou, chameleon, gorilla, and gamer 2.0. he also does it in lies, reverser, and the shangai special, and probably several more. imo as well as showing an intense attachment to ladybug, it also shows a lack of regard for his own health and wellbeing :( not to mention all the times he runs to fight akumas with no plans or tries to fight them on a broken ankle or other general recklessness

suicidal or self harming behavior: i know this is a stretch but this is a kid's show so we're probably not going to like. see any of that onscreen in a literal sense. but i do feel like some of the times where he sacrifices himself over and over could count. because no matter how much he trusts ladybug there's no guarantee she'll be able to fix everything, and he's immediately willing to die/be teleported into a shadow realm/turned into a kissing zombie/despawn/etc despite that. also he tried to cataclysm himself during guiltrip, tho that was bc of an akuma (although akumas do generally amplify preexisting emotions)

inappropriate/intense/difficult to control anger: trying to cataclysm kim because he played a mean prank on marinette is the first thing i think of. i feel like he definitely tends to suppress anger until it bubbles up and explodes, like in representation when he's going off on his dad about his parenting being shitty, which, while justified, definitely put him in more danger of being hurt. also i know it was in an alternate timeline + he was akumatized but he DID kill everyone in the world that one time. i support him though. he's allowed to do that because i love him

a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships, splitting: prefacing this with i dont think ladybug + chat noir are in an unhealthy relationship, but i do think that sometimes the way he sees ladybug can be unhealthily idolizing, in a way that's very reminiscent of favourite persons in bpd. most of season 4 is him being in love with ladybug but feeling pushed aside, until he splits on her in kuro neko (which i'm getting to i promise. this post is way longer than i thought it'd be). there's also desperada where he spends months in a time loop trying to save her despite presumably knowing he's not the person who should be saving her right now.

stress-related paranoid ideation or dissociative symptoms: tbh i dont know much abt paranoid ideation so i won't speak on that too much, but i do think his worst fear in sandboy being ladybug being upset with him despite having never acted that way before might fall into that category? as for dissociative symptoms, aside from the identity thing i mentioned earlier, i guess the scene in kuro neko where he's sitting on his couch doing nothing except running his video game character into a wall could be him dissociating? also apparently (i havent read/seen this myself but ive heard abt it) astruc said chat noir is resistant to akumas because he's so used to disappointment, which could suggest a level of emotional numbing

when i first was watching miraculous i was kinda thinking abt adrien having bpd but i didn't have anything super solid to explain it. but it's fun for me to analyze characters' mental states and nothing explicitly contradicts it so whatever. BUT THEN. KURO NEKO.

when ladybug snaps at him he immediately jumps to the conclusion that she hates him/is tired of him (splitting, paranoid thinking)

he decides to leave, which may seem contradictory to "frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment," but pushing people away and essentially abandoning someone before they abandon you (whether or not that was actually going to happen) is a super common result of that symptom and it's what he's doing here. he thinks she doesn't need him, so before she can tell him this he leaves

he leaves his miraculous behind where someone couldve grabbed it because he felt rejected (impulsive behaviour)

then he goes home and tries to destroy all the traces of his love for ladybug, getting rid of his pictures of her on his phone and physical pictures as well (splitting, difficulty controlling anger)

when he wakes up he lies in bed, skips school, doesn't change out of his pajamas, and spends his time running his video game character into a wall. to me it looks like he's completely shut down (dissociation)/in a depressive episode

the show from the beginning sets up that being chat noir is an escape for adrien, and the beginning of season 4 really hammers that point home. we see adrien having an awful day and only finally perking up when he gets to see ladybug. so when adrien gives up his ring that's him giving up on not only himself but on a huge part of his life and one of the only parts that brings him happiness. the way he talks about giving up his ring ("i just can't do this anymore. i give up. on everything") sounds like something a suicidal person would say. this is also something he's expressed before, in syren, when he says "no one'll know if I quit. no one'll care!" (not for nothing, this also comes after him feeling rejected by ladybug). to me it feels like he's been balancing on this metaphorical-suicide metaphorical-ledge for a very long time and kuro neko is him giving up, and then realizing that giving up isn't the way to feel better. (suicidal ideation, fear of abandonment)

adrien doesn't hesitate at the idea of completely changing his personality to be who he thinks marinette wishes he was. the need to make himself into whoever he thinks will be wanted has been a running theme through his life (his childhood dream was to be whoever his parents wanted him to be), and it doesn't fully end with kuro neko- the same insecurities about not being good enough are still shown in the later half of season 5, with him telling marinette he's not worthy of her love and telling ladybug making jokes is all he was ever good for (both in revolution). (low self-esteem, fear of abandonment)

catwalker in general makes me go insane. i think a lot of catwalker comes from the persona he puts on when he's acting as adrien agreste, gabriel agreste's golden child. and i think the constant deference is also something he learned from the abuse from his father. he leans into the "fawn" coping mechanism (adapting to an abuser's wishes to appease them, denying your own needs for those of others) because it's what he's learned to do his whole life because of his father.

catwalker is like a personified fawn fear response. he's the personification of adrien's frantic attempts to avoid abandonment. he's loyal to a fault and would do whatever ladybug asked him to just to try and be good enough for her to stay. he doesn't realize that he's already good enough as adrien/chat noir, that ladybug needs him to be himself or her magic literally doesn't work. she can't do it on her own. she needs him but he's so scared she'll leave that he tries to leave first and then tries to mold himself into someone new who she could love. when he was already loved fully the whole time. aough.

some other smaller examples of his low self esteem & desperation to avoid abandonment:

trying to get good grades to impress his father and earn his love

staying friends with people and trusting them for far longer than is logical (chloé and lila)

feeling like he's not worthy of marinette's love or ladybug's partnership, feeling like he's not worthy to be a miraculous holder or that he's not helping the team, etc

the shocked relief in his eyes when ladybug says she won’t abandon him :(

when gabriel says to chat noir that his son is precious and chat/adrien looks at him Like That. yeah .

SO. YEAH. this post kinda got away from me a little bit as i defended my agresteology dissertation or whatever.

TLDR: he's impulsive and loyal to a fault, yet terrified of abandonment to the point where he tries to sabotage his relationships himself. he idolizes ladybug until he feels rejected by him, when he splits on her and becomes convinced she doesn't care about him. he has low self-worth and places a lot of his perceived worth on how (he believes) others think of him and is always striving towards that ideal even when that ideal is something he can't reach, or something that hurts him to try to reach. also i want to give him a hug and some milk and a blanket. he deserves it

#ask #text #analysis #adrien agreste #ml #self harm mention #abuse mention #suicide mention #long post #mine #OKAY TAGS OVER #is this ready to post .i think it is.okay

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