#i mean not to say he isn't nice or a good person or anything he's just not usually very direct when it comes to stuff like that

[mothiepixie]

Regarding the pet-names ask (not me who asked), I lowkey like to think that Horror would give Motti cute food nicknames

Stuff like "muffin" or "cupcake" (maybe "strawberry SHORTcake" go get a rise out of her every now and then) and stuff like that. That is, once they're comfortable enough around each other for Horror to actually give himself such freedom. And it would be on very rare occasions too. (Maybe I'm just too used to a softer version of Horror)

As with Dust, it does kinda fit him to not call her any petnames, but her actual name. It would be more special to him because he doesn't need to "compare" her to anything because her appreciates her for who she is 🥹

Horror would call Motti "Cottage Cheese" if he ever gave her a petname. It wouldn't be cute, he would only do it to fuck with her or make fun of Killer for giving Motti petnames. My interpretation of Horror is a jaded, cynical asshole; and he knows that Motti isn't this cute innocent gal. He would fuck with her to get her to show the other sides of her that isn't all nice and sweet. Horror always trying to get Motti to be unapologetically herself. The good, the bad and the ugly even if he has to be the jerk.

This Horror has been betrayed, starved and left with tremendous trust issues. People not being their real self grates on his nerves something fierce because to him it means they're being shady and untrustworthy.

Motti is generally a sweet person, but is not afraid to show annoyance or say something for the sake of peace. Ever since Motti has displayed those sides, Horror was hooked. He sees a person who isn't faking it. Motti tells him what's what to his face and he respects that.

[spaghett-onaplate]

teehee i now have a very very wonderful photo

[nobodybetterlookatme]

Guess who's going on an actual fr date on Saturday ahsjakkskaksl

[starpros-sunshine]

seb. seb hes not smiling. and has a fatui background................

I knowwwwww he's still everything to me you do not know how smitten I am with Lyney as a character

[starboundsingularities]

hi i have. so many thoughts on this i hope you don't mind.

before saying anything i will preface this with three things:

i have not played through or seen investigations yet. i have heard a few things about it but for the most part the flashback case does not play a part in this. neither doe the anime, for similar reasons.

i am inherently biased. i see a lot of my great grandmother in manfred von karma's behavior, and my great grandmother was, to my understanding, abusive to me. so i'm very predisposed to saying that manfred von karma was abusive to his children as well, simply due to the parallels

this is in no way meant to be mean to the op, and do not send hate to them or i swear to god i will Get You. from my understanding they asked this not because of their own personal opinion or to prove any point but simply because they wanted to hear other people's opinions on the topic and this was an easy way to do so, as it invites both sharing of a base opinion and of your reasoning.

that being said, he was definitely not a good father. it's a very complex discussion, but i feel very confident in saying he was not a good father in any way.

it's comically easy to say he wasn't a good father figure to miles. his whole reason for taking him in was solely to twist him against everything he had wanted and then ultimately pin the blame on him for his father's death. his entire reason for taking him in was a petty revenge plot, because killing his father wasn't enough for him. that alone means that he couldn't have been a good father, regardless of how well he may or may not have treated miles in the time between the dl-6 incident and turnabout goodbyes.

however, his treatment of franziska is much, much more complex. i don't doubt that he cared for franziska, however i doubt he was a good father figure to her, either. even looking at how she acts, it's clear she has so, so many issues stemming from the standards he pushed onto her. she's unable to accept failure, no doubt due to the standard of perfection she was held to. she seems to see most, if not all others as beneath her in some way, which is likely again due to her upbringing. she was no doubt always being told that as a von karma, she had to have been better than others. even if not directly, simply being told that a von karma had to be perfect would no doubt instill a similar belief. after all, nobody can be better than perfect. i would love nothing more than to go on further, but doing so greatly risks this becoming mere projection. i've spent ample time with my great grandma, who similarly only accepted perfection from me, and it left me with a whole slew of problems. she managed to give me a superiority complex and an inferiority complex at the same time.

however, i don't think that he intended to be a bad father, at least not to franziska. he likely fully believed that he was doing what was best for her, leading her to success and perfection like that which he believed he had achieved. simply leading her to carry on a legacy. and i do truly doubt that he was "comically abusive" or whatever term people are using. no, i do not believe that manfred von karma regularly beat his kids, or did not love them at all, or whatever people are saying. i believe that he truly did care for them in some form, or at the very least cared for franziska. and i do believe that he did nice things for them. i doubt they ever had to be told "no" when asking for something, i'm sure he gave them everything they could want, at least in a material sense. i'm sure he took them out places whenever possible, and i'm sure they enjoyed it. that does not negate bad parenting though.

at risk of projecting more, i would like to briefly discuss my great grandma. she loved me very dearly. she told me such often, and the rest of my family told me they had never seen her as close with anyone as she was with me. she took me out all the time, i went swimming at least once a week in summer, she took me to karaoke often (which is a strangely specific parallel to have), she gave me nearly everything i asked for. she had a big house, we had a lot of toys, a lot of movies, nearly everything i could want. and it was fun. i enjoyed it.

but she mocked me relentlessly for any mistake. i stopped taking singing lessons because i couldn't sing well enough to fit her standards. our relationship ended entirely because i couldn't play a song flawlessly on the piano after a week. when i was sad, or upset, i had to take extra care to make sure she never noticed, or i would be called a crybaby. when i was trying to avoid her, she found me anyways simply to mock me. if i recall correctly, one day i was hiding in the basement because i was upset and she stormed downstairs to tell me i had a fat ass and force me to run on the treadmill. we hadn't even been arguing about it. i told my great grandfather once that i was scared of her, and not to tell her i said that. she found out anyways. i don't even remember what she did. i just know i was more scared after. if i ever told her i didn't know something, she would continue to grill me on it until i cried, then mock me for crying.

she loved me. she thought she had my best interests at heart. but despite all the good times, and despite her attempts at spoiling me, she still traumatized me. and many, or at least all of my friends, would agree that she abused me, even if not physically so.

and i feel that having manfred von karma as a father would be a similar experience. perhaps not the exact same. most details would be different. but i believe the overall feeling would be similar enough.

(the poll is just a decoration i just want to read manfred discourse)

[undreaming-fanfiction]

I love a good florist Steve, but what I love even more is a good but naturally bitchy florist Steve.

He'd have his own flower shop and years of dating experience under his belt. He is not just a good boyfriend, he is THE good boyfriend. Going to his shop isn't just to buy a bouquet of flowers, oh no. It's a whole relationship coaching thing, he teaches husbands to do better, gives courage to teenagers asking their crushes out, gives advice regarding flower language to elderly ladies who just want to be slightly passive-aggressive...you know, the normal thing.

He has a catalogue with flower pictures to help people who have no idea what the flowers are called, they just know they were orange and didn't easily wilt.

He shows a local teenager the cheaper but still fancy options and throws in a bunch of free flowers that aren't really up to his standards. "Okay, you say she likes pink flowers. Does she like things to be a bit more decorated or does she prefer simplicity? You don't know? Okay, can you describe what she normally wears? No, I'm not being creepy, but you can sometimes tell the person's preferences from their clothes. Now answer or leave dateless."

He chats with the elderly ladies of Hawkins when they ask for a flower to gift to their fellow church ladies when they host their meetings. He cackles when he hears some of their orders. "Oh wow, Ethel, a yellow hyacinth? Would you like a gift card with that, something like sorry you're such a jealous hag? No? Of course I know the meaning, it's my job."

"Are you expeting her to say yes to the date with that atrocity on your face? Yes, I know it's a moustache. But it's also an atrocity. Shave it and thank me later. Now, would you like a ribbon for that bouquet?"

And most of all, he grills the unlucky conservative men in Hawkins who come to him for flowers for their wives without any idea what they like. "I see, so you want something pretty. What does your wife like? Flowers? Well, that's not specific. What kind of dresses does she wear? Expensive? Can you tell me anything about your wife's personality? ...nagging. No, I can't just mix something together, unlike you, I take pride in gift giving. Okay. I don't think this is a shop for you. Yes, that's what I'm saying, I won't play a part in your wife's disappointment. Oh sure, go take your money elsewhere, but I can give you this advice for free - you married a unique human being, so treat her like one. And if you really want a happy marriage - maybe come back when you learn something about her as a person. No need for that language, have a good day, sir."

For those that are more receptive, he goes through their partners' personalities and hobbies, suggesting date options and absolutely roasting the bad ones. "A football match. When your girlfriend hates sports. I don't care if it's your boys playing, you can try telling her that this is important to you and you'll take her out another time, but if you try to pass this as a date, you'll be single before you say "sorry". A date is for you as a pair, not for you only."

But the best thing his shop brings him is Eddie Munson, who sneaks in, absolutely ready to be roasted, and asks for a bouquet of bright colorful flowers for his best friend Chrissy. "She just got divorced from her asshole husband and I want to show her that she can have nice things. Platonically. But she deserves so much more. Uh...she really loves warm colors, so maybe yellows and oranges? What are they called...gerberas! She likes gerberas! And she likes things to be a bit messy and imperfect, so maybe some leaves there as well? A green ribbon would be nice."

And Steve just beams at him as he gets to work and says "Oh wow. Whoever your partner is, they are so lucky if you remember all of these things even for your friends. Makes a guy jealous."

Eddie just wiggles his eyebrows at Steve and mutters, "that position's sadly open. Has been for a while. Interested?" and he almost faints against the counter when Steve turns around.

Eddie is ready to run.

But Steve just fluffs his hair, reapplies his lipgloss and asks: "Where do I apply?"

[cupcakesmoothie]

I know it's stupid or whatever because talking about your problems is important and all that but I wonder if my brother has realised I don't talk to him about my problems anymore

[mameillieureennemie]

co-workers!vi x f!reader

cw: drunk!reader

summary: on an employee outing, vi gets to hear what you really think of her.

"You're staring at her again," Ekko says, taking a sip of his beer, and Vi doesn't acknowledge his words until he's nudging her. "Stop staring, it's creepy."

"I'm not staring." Vi replies, but it's a lie because she is staring. She's staring at you from across the bar, observing how you're interacting with your colleagues. How you smile wide and laugh loud, eyes crinkling at the sides while your nose scrunches up cutely.

God, you're cute.

It's fucking annoying.

Ekko snorts. "Sure," he murmurs, loud enough for Vi to hear before he's sliding Vi's beer closer to her. "Drink up. At least the alcohol will make the pining more bearable."

This time, Vi's able to rip her gaze away from you so she can aim a look at Ekko. "I'm not pining," she grumbles and takes hold of her beer, bringing it to her lips. "I'm just watching my surroundings." She takes a sip, basking at the cool liquid sliding down her throat. "And she so happens to be in my field of vision so—"

"Cut the shit, Vi," Ekko interrupts with a laugh. "You and I both know you can't lie to save your life when it comes to your feelings." He nudges her again, softer this time. "It's okay to be honest about how you feel. Even if it's just with me."

Vi stares at him for a moment, looks back at you, and down at her bottle. There's a lot of conflicting feelings within her; it's easy to get lost in them without a proper navigator. Which should be her, but Vi isn't very used to sorting her feelings out; she's more used to letting them fester until they're too painful to touch.

Her feelings for you exist within the space; she knows how she feels towards you. She's very aware of how attractive she finds you, how your personality sparks a fire in her, and how you're never one to take her bullshit. You steamroll over her multiple times, merciless with your approach, and it's so irritating yet so wonderful because you're a challenge, and she loves challenges.

But she seems to do nothing but add stress to your existence. The thought that you may not view the dynamic you have similarly is always enough to dampen Vi's mood.

So maybe she is pining, but she'll be long dead before she ever admits it.

"Shut up, Ekko," Vi says into the mouth of her beer bottle, flipping him off as she goes in for another sip. "You don't know anything."

"You do know the story of me and your sister, right?" Ekko shoots back, deadpan, and Vi tries not to choke on her beer as she laughs. "Telling me I don't know shit when I had to deal with—oh, incoming!"

Vi doesn't even have a chance to ask what he means by that when you're suddenly pressed up against her side.

Nice and warm, and oh, you smell so good.

"Vi!" You exclaim happily, which is new because you're never happy to see her. You're usually exasperated or furious as hell. "Oh my god, I haven't seen you this evening, how are you!?"

Vi blinks, puzzled before she says, "Yeah, um, I've been at the bar with Ek—" She turns to gesture at Ekko, but he's disappeared. The asshole. "Well, was here with Ekko, but he's gone so..."

"Aw, that sucks," you reply with an awfully tempting pout, the plush of your lips a siren call to Vi's eyes. "It's not nice being left alone. You should have joined us!" You lean more into her side, your breath floating up to her nose, and oh, you're drunk.

That explains the sudden change in your tune towards her.

"I...didn't think you'd want me around you," Vi hesitantly confesses, watching as your eyes widen in shock. "You know, given our relationship and stuff."

"That's not true!" You yell, loud enough to capture the attention of some patrons. "Vi, I love having you around! You make work so much fun, it wouldn't be the same with you!"

Vi's own eyes widen. "Really?"

You nod frantically. "Yes!" You wrap your arms around one of hers, the one you're leaning against. It fits snugly against your chest, sending a bolt of heat down Vi's spine. "I don't think work would be the same. It'd be boring with you pushing my buttons." You then giggle, a noise Vi's never heard you make and fuck, it's adorable. "Plus, there'd be nothing for my eyes to feast on." You lean in even closer until your lips brush against the curve of her ear. "You're really hot."

Vi instantly feels herself being set aflame, her still wide eyes widening further. She stares at you in disbelief, cheeks a rosy red, as she stammers, "I—I—you, you think I'm—?"

You giggle again, coyly covering your mouth with your free hand. "Mhm," you hum out teasingly. You then look around, lean in even closer and say, "But don't tell Violet."

Vi's brain short circuits at this, and all she can do is watch helplessly as you're called away.

Ekko suddenly reappears, now holding a glass of some liquor, and asks, "What did I miss?"

Vi, in a daze, replies, "She thinks I'm hot."

Ekko chokes on his drink.

[merrinla]

Davrin vs Lucanis cut content. Actually, some of it was rewritten, but most of it was cut.

I guess this is a previous version of the dialogue after Weisshaupt.

Davrin: My problem is you've got a demon in you. That's enough to lock you away. But you're also very good at killing people. Davrin: Combine the two, and I don't know how we let you anywhere near this team. Lucanis: Because it wasn't your decision. (?): Lay off, Davrin. It's not your place to interrogate him. (?): Rook made the call. Rook: All right, all right. That's enough. Davrin: No, it isn't. Davrin: If this demon gets out of hand we're all in trouble. Rook: I'm not worried about Lucanis. Davrin: But you should be…. (?): But you were worried, Rook. Rook: Well, I'm not now. Rook: Everyone deserves a chance. Rook: I stand by my decision. Lucanis and his demon will behave. Davrin: But how can you know that? What if Spite attacks Assan? Lucanis: He'd win. Davrin: What? If anything happens to Assan— Lucanis: The Venatori were better at it. Davrin: Yeah? Well they had your number real good. Lucanis: And what about you, Warden? Don't all your kind have the blood of darkspawn in your veins? Davrin: What do you know about that? Lucanis: Adamant Fortress. The Wardens must have told stories about it. Everyone else did. Lucanis: Prison warden… Grey Warden, what's the difference? Davrin: Let me get my blade and I'll show you— Rook: Careful there, Lucanis. I'm a Grey Warden too. option: Both of you work this out. Rook: You're adults. You can settle how to work together yourselves. option: Davrin is right. Rook: Obviously, having a demon in the Lighthouse is dangerous. We can't pretend otherwise. Lucanis: You're no longer glad I'm here? Rook: I am. But Davrin's not wrong. Lucanis: And I thought we were getting along. Rook: I still need to be careful. option: Lucanis is right. Rook: Every single person on this team is dangerous. Nice, safe, regular people don't fight ancient gods. (?): We're being careful. I'll be keeping an eye on Lucanis. (?): I'll be watching Lucanis. (?): Somebody has to. Lucanis: Such fine hospitality. Davrin: Just be grateful you're not back in the Ossuary.

The conversation with Varric after that.

Rook: Davrin and Lucanis hated each other on sight. And I just ticked off Lucanis. Again. The minute he got back. Rook: Davrin and Lucanis hated each other on sight, and now Lucanis is probably ticked at me. Rook: Davrin and Lucanis hated each other instantly. And now Davrin's ticked off at me. Rook: Davrin and Lucanis hated each other on sight. And now they're both ticked at me. Varric: Don't panic. Things always seem impossible. Just fight one battle at a time. option: I need to find the enemy. Rook: I can't fight any battles right now, Varric. We have no targets. Rook: Don't give me sage advice. Give me a target. option: I need a plan, not platitudes. Rook: I know you're trying to help. Rook: I appreciate the effort, Varric, but that doesn't exactly help when we don't know where to go next. Varric: Look around you. You've got all these people. Experts in all sorts of things. Rook: I just told you, the team— Varric: No, no. That's the problem. You have people. Not a team. They don't know each other, and they don't know you. Varric: Work on getting to know them. The better you understand your people, the closer you get to having a team. Rook: Understanding won't make them work together. Varric: No, you have to do that. Which means they all have to trust you. Even if they hate each other. Rook: That's not going to work. Varric: It's worth a try. Rook: How? I've never led people like these before. Varric: Ordinarily, I'd say you should get them all into a game of Wicked Grace, but I think you'll have to work up to that. Varric: Start with Lucanis and Davrin. Something else must be eating at them, to get them at each other's throats. Rook: I guess it can't hurt. Varric: That's the spirit.

Another squabble.

(?): The trail's gone cold. (?): We don't have any leads. Rook: Hey, what's— Davrin: You're the Crow! You're supposed to have eyes and ears everywhere! Or maybe the only voice you hear is Spite's! Rook: I said, Hey! Lucanis: You're the Grey Warden, the "expert" on all this blight! You're supposed to have answers! Lucanis: Maybe you're spending too much time playing with your flying cat! Rook: So the two of you decide to tear into each other? Knock it off. Rook: That's not anyone's fault. We just haven't caught a break yet. Lucanis: Tell him that. You said it yourself, Rook: Davrin's the problem. Davrin: Tell him that. You said it yourself, Rook: Lucanis is the problem. Rook: Seriously! You need to take all this anger and use it against Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain! Davrin: I'd love nothing more. Just as soon as Lucanis and his Crows do anything to find them. Lucanis: We're waiting for you and your Wardens to remember your job is to… What is it again? Oh, yes—destroy the blight. Rook: You think it makes me happy? I'm pissed off, too Davrin: You should be pissed at him. You said it yourself, Rook: Lucanis is a problem. Lucanis: You should be pissed at him. You said it yourself, Rook: Davrin is a problem. Lucanis: You should be pissed at him. I tried to warn you. Davrin: I tried to warn you about him, Rook. Davrin: If you'd listened to me about him, we wouldn't have this problem. Lucanis: You said it yourself, Rook: Davrin is a problem. Davrin: You said it yourself, Rook, Lucanis is a problem. Rook: The way you two are going, I'd rather spend my time talking with Solas. Rook: I wouldn't mind a little break from reality right about now. Can you guys knock this off? Rook: I know you're both doing your best. That doesn't mean you have to like each other. Rook: But it does mean you have to stop the constant fighting. Okay? Rook: I'm not tolerating this. You're both professionals and I expect you to act like it. Understood? Davrin: I hear you, Rook. But as a professional my duty is to keep an eye on him and Spite. Lucanis: And with darkspawn blood running through your veins, I'll be watching you. Professionally.

[lxdymoon0357]

Hey how are you doing I hope. Can I request a yandere Phileo Boleoti x f reader. In which reader is leonia's assigned nanny. Phileo Boleoti from I become the male lead adopted daughter 😶‍🌫️

(Thank you for this request!! Warnings: mentions of child abuse, kidnapping, manipulation, using Leonia a manipulation bait, murder, isolation, starvation, accusations)

© Writing belongs to me, Lxdymoon0357. Do not plagiarize, but reblogging, liking and commenting is deeply appreciated.

Yandere! Phileo Boleoti X Nanny! Reader

╬ Phileo had of-course met you because you were Leonia's nanny..caring for the rambunctious kid of his who ran around, salivating over muscles. He had always been thankful to you sort of for keeping her out of trouble, he was usually so tired caring for her.

╬ It wasn't long before he was close with you, almost actually being friends and Leonia of-course caught on..she was weirdly smart like that. Teasing him for hours on end and almost revealing his feelings, but he kept her quiet with candies and stuff...thank the lord.

╬ Leonia was so excited when Phileo did eventually ask you out. She was adamant on planning everything and threatened to disown her dad if he hurt you. And eventually she was also the one to suggest the kidnapping and everything innocently as if it was a passing comment, but she utterly meant to give her father the suggestion to kidnap to keep you locked to her, she loves you! You're her mum now!

╬ Phielo is very protective, easy guess. Like Leonia, most people won't be fucking with you if they see the Boleoti family symbol on your clothing, coats or jewellery. You're forced into wearing them, Vera and Rupert are the one to make sure you're okay. Levipath is your guard when Leonia is spending time with you, making sure you're okay but above all also making sure Leonia won't get hurt by any outbursts you do out of loneliness, anger, sadness and stuff, she cannot afford it.

╬ But it doesn't mean he's nice all the time, he does have a few punishments, mostly soft ones like starving you for a day or two, but is face is just so intimidating, you don't get the easy habit of actually walking over his rules and lines. He's very strict and stern on rules, though he does let you free a bit on his rules, but he makes sure you follow it like a good girl.

╬ Phileo is very much adamant on having NO person who can admire you more than him, it's easier to haunt them down with accusations of breeding illegal monsters for exotic pet trade. He'll plant it on the person and their family, no mercy or remorse in his veins...The hell are they gonna do? Accuse the GRAND DUKE?! It has to be a deranged joke.

╬ Phileo sometimes feels it's too far, but he does use Leonia as a way to keep you locked down to him. You're bound to get connected to Leonia seeing how you're her nanny and also because she's a kid and you're gonna get protective, he'll use Leonia as a way to keep you tied to him as long as stockholm syndrome kicks in.

╬ There is no way he's going to let you go, that much is easy to tell. He'll literally put you on blacklist with a criminal record on abusing kids so no one will hire you as a nanny so even if you escape, you will not last long in the world without a job as a nanny. He'll make sure you have no one else but him and Leonia in your life. Accusations, crime record, he'll do anything in his power to keep you as down as possible.

╬ Leonia is also smart enough, being old enough..she'll go with anything her father tells her to, she'll listen to everything he says, manipulate you even more since you're her nanny and all. She isn't actually allowed to spend too much time with you now though, just for her safety in Phileo's opinion until you're utterly used to this lifestyle, Leonia has a new nanny whom she does not like AT ALL!

╬ Phileo has few trusted people to even interact with you, with a few maids. Those people don't even include Rupert, only Vera, Levipath and Leonia to interact with you. Rupert might agree to not see you for his own safety since he know a little mistake could risk his life too even as Phileo's dear friend. He didn't want it, and he didn't want to involve himself, though he does serve you seriously and makes sure you're living normally.

╬ Phileo often takes his competition to his monster expeditions and kills them there, if they are somewhere in his guard-ship or his staff, or they plant crimes on the person, like I said about illegally breeding monsters for illegal exotic pet trade, but other types of crimes as well, if they are someone else. He is not afraid to even plant crimes or dig up as much dirt as possible on other nobles.

╬ Vera like to keep you in line for honor and image of the Boleoti, she's possibly the only Phileo trusts you with, he even trusts her to raise her hand on you if it meant to keep you in line, somehow. Of-course Vera only hit you if you're like VERY out of line and disobedient, she'll use your trauma against you, if you have any, but he usually doesn't, she's a calm woman for the lady of the house after all.

[optimist-pine]

Bodyguard

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

Warnings: people are naked, but it's barely even borderline suggestive

Summary: You need a bath, but there's no way you're going alone

Era: Season 1, the Quarry

Your skin practically crawls from the buildup of dirt, sweat, and who knows what else that's managed to accumulate over the past three days. You still haven't quite adjusted to the reality of not having on-demand access to a hot shower and your scalp is all oily, and itchy, and eugh - gross. A little shiver runs down your spine at the thought - well, maybe that's just more sweat...

The bold shades of the sunset are beginning to fade as you make your way to the Dixon brothers' camp. Currently they're the closest thing you have to neighbors, your tent being between theirs and the rest of the group. You're dying for a quick dip and rinse in the pond, but you don't actually want to die for a bath, and you know it's a dumb idea to go alone. Everyone else seems busy though and you've come to the conclusion that Daryl seems to be your only option.

Most of the others actively avoid the brothers, and you can't say you blame them. Merle's constantly stirring up trouble and being a general annoyance, and Daryl's quick to jump to his defense. But, on the rare occasion when Daryl isn't being held under Merle's thumb, you catch glimpses of a very different person than what he usually puts out.

He's sitting in an old lawn chair by the side of a fire when you approach, poking a stick around in the coals. Little sparks shoot off where the fresh evening air hits them, and the smell of woodsmoke fills your lungs.

"Hey." You greet. A spot of doubt begins to arise within you, but you quickly stamp it out. With recent events you were beginning to discover that there wasn't much room left for second guessing or overthinking anymore.

"Need somethin'?" He asks, eyes flicking up to you for a moment before returning to the flames.

You hang your thumbs in your belt loops, fingers tapping against your hips. "If you're not busy, I was hoping maybe you could go down to the water with me? I'd ask someone else but they all seem rather occupied at the moment... and I don't think Shane'd let me go alone." You say.

He looks up, jaw set awfully close to a scowl. "I ain't gonna be yer damn bodyguard." He huffs.

"No- I don't want you to watch me or anything like that- I guess I'm just asking for companionship?" You reply. "You could do whatever you're gonna do here, but just do it down there?" You hike your thumb over your shoulder in the direction of the pond.

He stays silent, but a sudden chorus of laughter flows out from the direction of the rest of the group. You study the way the firelight smooths out his rough edges, and you can't help but wonder if the look in his eyes is just boredom or if it's really loneliness.

"Unless you prefer Merle's company, then by all means I'll leave ya to it." You continue, trying your best to ignore Merle sawing logs in the tent, and erase the image of his hand too close to his crotch from your mind.

He jams the stick into the dirt hard enough that it remains standing when he lets go. "A'ight. Lemme get 'mah stuff."

"Awesome, I'll be over at my tent when you're ready." You smile, pleased and a little surprised that you'd managed to get him to say yes. Admittedly, Merle wasn't so bad when he was passed out, but it was reassuring to know that you were at least preferred company over an unconscious jerk.

---

Dirt and gravel crunch under your boots as the two of you walk, your knapsack bouncing steadily against your back with each step. "Thanks for coming with me. I'm not necessarily afraid of the dark or anything, but there's a lot worse things in the woods now than just coyotes." You explain. "And it's just nice not to be alone."

He simply grunts in response.

Good thing you didn't ask him along for his conversational skills.

When you reach the edge of the water you find a rock close to the shore to set out clean clothes and a towel. You see Daryl settle down, back propped against a boulder as he starts rummaging around in his own bag. "Whatcha gonna work on?" You ask.

He pulls out a whetstone and a couple large hunting knives. "Cleanin' mah tools." He replies.

You begin to undress, but a feeling of uncertainty causes you to pause. "Man, I wish I didn't feel like he's sitting up there right now with those binoculars..."

"Who? Shane?" He asks sounding surprised.

"Yeah." You shudder. "Guy gives me the creeps."

You hear scrape of the knife grinding against the sharpener. "Well, hurry up an'ere won' be anythin' ta see." He says.

"Yeah..." You keep your eye on Daryl while you finish, but he doesn't lift his gaze even once beyond sharpening his knife. "I won't be long." You assure him as the cool water rises around you.

As soon as you're far enough in you dive forward, the rush of water instantly reviving and refreshing your whole body as it flows past. You rise upwards as giddiness fills you and you break the surface with a laugh. "This is heavenly!" You gasp. You continue diving and twirling, every sore muscle and painful bruise easing away.

You pause to catch your breath and a small splash has you immediately alert. You left your knife up on the shore with Daryl, but you hadn't heard any sounds of alarm from him so surely it's not a walker. But when you look to the shore the sight has you almost equally as shocked. Daryl is chest deep in the water - bare chested that is - ripples being sent out across the still expanse as he sinks further in.

"Hey!" You yell. "I asked you out here because I thought you weren't some sorta pervert!" You hope it's dark enough that nothing in the water is visible because he's only getting closer.

The moon is full and bright, and the way it reflects off the water makes him look almost ethereal. "Can't protect ya if I'm up'ere an' yer alla'way out 'ere." He reasons.

"I don't need protecting." You roll your eyes. "And all the weapons are up there, Dixon!" You send a splash of water directly into his face.

He returns the splash. "Looked like I was missin' out on alla fun." He shrugs. "'Sides, ya never know when somethin' might jus'-" he disappears under the surface of the water and barely a second later something wraps around your ankle, tugging you under the surface.

When you're released you bob back up to the top wanting to be stern, but you're too busy giggling and swallowing mouthfuls of water to do so. When he surfaces behind you, you turn and splash him again sputtering, "Daryl you- that's not- I can't-" and end up full on belly laughing while trying to stay afloat.

You think you catch the shadow of a smile on his lips before he turns and floats away, like he's done nothing worthy of retaliation. 'Oho boy is he gonna get it.' As quietly as possible you lower yourself in the water, and using shadows from the moonlight, you swim under his head. Reaching up with both hands you use all your strength to grab his shoulders and pull yourself above the surface while pushing him down as hard as you can. Then you make a break for it.

You hear him gasp for air, coughing and sputtering as you swim as fast as you can in the opposite direction.

"Get back 'ere, woman!" He shouts, his tone highly amused. "Yer gonna hafta pay 'fer that!"

You don't realize how loudly you're laughing until the beam of a flashlight is suddenly shining directly in your face.

"Everything alright here?" Shane questions, standing on the shore not far from your and Daryl's discarded clothes. A few of the others are with him; Dale, Andrea, T-Dog, and Morales.

Even in the chilly water you can feel your skin begin to flush all the way down your neck. "Yes! All good!" You squeak out, squinting in the harsh brightness.

"We heard yelling." Andrea chimes in.

You're confident that in all your life you've never been more embarrassed. "That was laughing, guys. I wanted a bath and I asked Daryl to be my bodyguard. We were just, uh, blowing off some steam and I guess we got a little loud... Sorry if we worried anyone." You glance at Daryl who appears to be doing his best impression of the invisible man.

You can make out Dale's hat exceptionally well even in the darkness. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Their hesitation to leave sparks frustration within you - do they really think so lowly of Daryl? Is that what this is all about? Sure, nobody really knows him all that well, but you're all practically strangers and he's done alright by you. The desire to defend him takes over and you snap at the group, "Ah, what're y'all, the fun police? Go ruin somebody else's night and leave us be."

You don't take a good breath until they're all headed back to camp, and it's once again quiet and dark. You sigh, tilting your head back to watch the stars so high above as you float. "Dead people walking around eatin' living people - ya think they'd have bigger problems to deal with than a couple'a skinny dippers." You remark.

A quick exhale of a laugh, not quite a snort, echoes across the pond. "People're always jealous of'a good time if they ain't havin' one." He says quietly.

You pull your fingers through the water, feeling the tension push against them. "So... are ya feeling jealous, or did ya have a good time?" You ask.

"S'pose it wasn't too bad." He says. "But I ain't yer damn bodyguard."

And you grin.

---

Yeah, maybe it's a little awkward getting dried off, getting dressed, and walking back to camp but you sleep more soundly than you have since you arrived. And maybe you're a little annoyed with the way everyone seems to have nothing better to do than gossip, but that new gleam in Daryl's eye when he looks at you wipes it all from your mind. And maybe a lot of things suck, but at the end of the day there's someone who actually likes you, and maybe that's enough.

[justpeaxchy]

I heard you accepted opinions than httyd, could I ask for one? maybe a headcanoon about Hiccup x reader, maybe "how Hiccup would show love to the reader or what would happen if he was jealous", thank you for considering it.

Warnings(?): Hiccup is a lil jealous. A/n: thank you for the request <3! I hope I brought what you were asking for with the headcanons! (I feel like it's a bit short, but here you go! Notes: takes place after httyd 2 and before the plot of httyd 3.

Jealousy has a sword

First off, Hiccup wouldn't be one to get jealous that quickly, although he is protective and such, he trusts you to know that you won't do anything that'll purposefully hurt him in that way.

This doesn't mean he can ignore the pricking feelings of jealousy whenever someone or something else is taking up a lot of your time - more than usual.

He has a habit of checking on you throughout the day, even if his schedule is brimmed with chiefly duties, it's his desire to make sure you're just overall okay. So when he finds himself being more occupied throughout the day and gets the word that you're spending your time with other people, he feels somewhat guilty that he can't be that person who's giving you some attention.

Then the jealousy kicks in.

Especially if it's Eret; he trusts the guy now but he isn't dumb - almost everyone says he is extremely handsome and well-built. He knows you wouldn't do anything with him but he just doesn't like it if he's the one who's with you the most throughout your daily tasks.

"So, how was your day?" He'd ask. You hummed, embracing him into a warm hug that he initiated. "It was nice. I got to go on patrol with Astrid, help put out a couple of fires - again - and, oh, Eret helped me a bit with my sword fighting. After that I was in-"

"Wait, wait, wait. You said who helped you out?" Hiccup slightly broke out of the hug to look at you as you questioningly gazed back at him.

"Uhm, Eret?" You remained still in your spot as you watched him deeply sigh, his head turning towards the ground, allowing his hair to barely brush against your face. "Is ... something the matter..?"

Hiccup shook his head, his hair tickling your nose in the slightest, as he lifted his eyes to meet yours while he spoke hesitantly: "N-no, I just-" he sighed once again as he stared at you, fumbling over his words. As though he had given up on speaking, he gently pulled you closer, allowing your lips to meet. The kiss held an earnestness and passion that was disguised by the delicate way he handled you. He took his time pulling away from you, only doing it because of the necessary oxygen you both needed while he took in every detail on your face.

"Nothing's wrong.. I suppose.. but you do know that you can always come to me for that kind of stuff, right?" He leaned his forehead against yours, auburn hair mixing with yours at the touch.

You were flustered at his response, fighting against the temptation to stutter in your speech; "Yeah, I know... but you're more busy now and I wouldn't want to make you feel more stressed or anything-"

Hiccup was quick to interrupt you as he shut down your statement: "No. You wouldn't be doing anything bad to me if you came and asked for my help in something. I want you to do that." His answer seemed to be more urgent than he wanted, making him clear his throat from the embarrassment that began to creep upon him, "W-when you're a available, that is.." He let out a breath that looked as though he were exhaling all negative feelings away. "Y'know what, I'm making a new plan. From now on, we'll meet every day to better improve your sword techniques. Sound good?"

You were shocked, to say the least, by his answer. It took a lot of convincing to tell him that it shouldn't be every single day this happens, for the sake of his schedule and the things he has to do on certain occasions. He's the Chief now, not a teenage kid running away from his problems anymore - which made him a little bit sour when he thought about it.

In the end, after practicing your sword fighting every other day, he just went right back into doing it everyday instead. Even moreso after Snotlout had tried to spar with you. Hiccup felt more "entitled" to do that specific activity with you - for some odd reason.

(He just really likes to do this with you, especially with Inferno.)

"Hiccup, it's not like we don't see each other everyday as it is-"

"Shush. We're gonna meet everyday and work on this. It's for your benefit anyways. "

He definitely feels like it's one of the ways he can show his love for you, if not the most important one: by giving you his time.

(That's why he's so protective over being the person that helps you with your sword fighting.)

----------------------------------------------

[101maverick]

Hi! Saw your newest post, so thought I might as well try to help with your writers block :)

How about headcanons of the bat boys dating a broke reader? Alternatively, batboys x bimbo!reader?

Hope this helps you get out of your slump, enjoy the rest of your day and take your time if you ain't up for it :]

A/n: Tysm for the request! Hope you enjoy :)

Dick Grayson

Being resident in Bludhaven, he's financially independent and certainly not rich. He refuses to depend on Bruce.

This means he hasn't got any trust fund money to give you, but he'd definitely help you out any way he can

He'd buy you practical gifts as well as normal ones whenever he's got the chance, and if you're living together the way you divide the living costs would definitely be proportional to your spending power

Dick isn't rich but he's not broke either: the average annual salary for cops in the us is roughly $66.000, but he owns the two-bedroom apartment you live in so the only thing you guys need to pay is taxes and bills, no rent to worry about. You're also not at home for most of the day, seeing as he works as a cop and you have your own job that takes up a good chunk of your day, so the electricity bill isn't very high.

I personally think Reader would not enjoy not having to pay for anything seeing as the money comes out of Dick's own pocket, so she'd at the very least insist on paying for groceries and helping out more in the house with laundry, dishes, cleaning et cetera, to even out the responsibilities as much as possible

He'd support you as much as possible if you're getting a degree, he'd be like your own personal cheerleader, and after you get it he'd organise this huge surprise graduation party for you and then help you get a job in the field of your degree

like if you became a lawyer he'd hook you up with some judges/attorneys he knows aren't corrupt and get you a job in their law firm (paid intern of course, after having worked so hard you want to make it yourself in the world)

I think you two would have tons of fun at the thrift! You wouldn't feel bad about him insisting to spend his money, and you would have the best time just perusing the racks and laughing at all the insane stuff you find plus trying on some genuinely nice clothes

One thing he splurges on though is making sure you have a state-of-the-art home gym, in fact that is why he buys your building's basement and equips it with every work-out machine under the sun plus a trapeze and equipment to practice a ton of other dynamic sports of the sort

————————————

Jason Todd

He's a crime lord so it's safe to say this dude is filthy rich

He obviously doesn't show it though and apart from having a lot of it as an emergency fund for when he needs to defend himself in gang wars I believe he anonymously donates the rest to charities

I go with the canon of Jason being catholic so I believe he gives to the Church, but it could obviously be something else like one of the many Wayne foundations (cause as much as he holds a grudge against his father he knows he's obviously not corrupt and actually helps people)

apart from this he definitely still has a lot of money

He'd refuse to see you struggle financially

He's been through that, he knows how awful it is and does not hear no for an answer when he goes to hand you insane amounts of cash

If you live together then he makes sure to get a nice apartment in the respectable parts of town, blending in with the rest of the neighbourhood to make sure the location is safe and as untraceable as possible

He handles everything and refuses to even let you pay for groceries, insisting that you concentrate on your studies and not worry about having to sustain yourself

To him you guys being a team means that you hold each other up any way you can, and you already support him immensely just by being by his side and loving him, so to him this is just doing his part and supporting you (on top of loving you like crazy of course)

One thing he'd do is make sure your house has enough space to host an insane amount of books though

On this topic I think he'd absolutely spoil you with book hauls, just taking you to every book store you can find and buying piles and piles of books

I'm talking those beautiful gold-leaf covered editions of centuries-old classics, and it doesn't matter if you already have the stories per-se in your library cause it's the edition that matters in this case, ya know?

Like sometimes you want to feel regal and distinguished reading the gold-lined hardcover Commedia, sometimes you want to feel quirky with your penguin edition Jane Eyre, other times you just want to embrace your inner sewer rat and read Macbeth from the shitty mass-produced paperbacks and Jason acknowledges and embraces it

————————————

Tim Drake

Tim, like Jason, is also filthy rich, in virtue of being the owner of Drake Industries and the representative C.E.O. for Bruce at Wayne Enterprises

You'd both live in his Nest, and given the horrendous amount of electricity it consumes it's all already paid for by his company so no need to worry about that

He would only accept "payment" for everything he does for you in the form of you making sure he goes to sleep at decent amounts of time when he's elbow-deep in a case (and tons of love, obviously)

Like Jason, he'd just hands you wads of cash

EXCEPT! He does it for the most mundane stuff. Timothy Jackson Drake is a nepo baby, no way around that. Sure, while he spent his time stalking Batman and Robin through the rougher parts of Gotham he learnt street-safety 101, but he always carried anything he needed for those nightly strolls in his backpack, and he never really learned the real value of money. "$2.70 for a small bottle of water? Sounds reasonable!" is his thought process to this day.

You two would often have these moments of 'culture shock', with Tim slowly discovering how much things should cost every time you two go out to run errands together and you discovering about the insane things the rich buy and do just because Tim decided to recount some childhood stories/told you about some stuff socialites did ad a gala

Since I think Tim's love language is quality time I think he'd take you on these absurd trips whenever possible, that to you are to absurd places but to him it's a very normal trip because "my parents always went there twice a year? It's an extremely normal vacation spot?" Meanwhile it's the Maldives or a private island in Greece or something

This being Tim you also HAVE to have a state-of-the-art phone, with tons of features you will never need to use since you're a civilian but it makes him more at ease, knowing that if the need arises you have the ability to disarm a bomb with the click of a button on your display

————————————

Damian Wayne-Al Ghul

Oh he'd absolutely refuse to have you living anywhere but a castle

It'd take convincing for him to have you living in anything less than a penthouse in the diamond district

He's not against the idea of you working, but he doesn't think that it's necessary for you to slave away at a minimum-wage job while you could be spending all your time in luxury while studying for your degree

After you get your degree he'd help you find a job at one of the most important places for your specialisation, pulling the needed strings just to make sure your resume isn't overlooked (nothing more, he's of the idea that his partner should be strong, plus he believes you to be extremely capable and so thinks that pulling strings to get you the job would be a disservice and an offence to you)

Absolutely spoils you with gifts, and by that I mean: clothes, jewellery, if you like cars he'll buy you a carpark, anything you look at for more than two seconds he'll buy

Damian's way of showing love is through gestures, so you rejecting his gifts would hurt him and he'd take it to mean that you are rejecting him/are unsatisfied with him

Like with Tim, you both would have "Culture shocks" over stuff like the worth of money, lifestyle and stuff like that

Because Damian is basically a royal (or at the very least was raised like one, I don't know what's happened to the LoA in current canon) I think he'd lowkey try to get you an armed guard for when you need to go out as a sign of love lol

"Damian I've been feeling watched while going out as of late" "Don't worry Beloved, that's just the armed guard" "Oh ok-I'm sorry what?!"

Things like anniversaries, birthdays and big events are celebrated in the most lavish settings but in a private way still, like he'll absolutely spoil you and take you to visit this super famous castle for your birthday, matter of fact he'll rent it out for the occasion

For real he does this because when you're alone he can be himself and he loves doing that when you're both experiencing something that makes you happy-- But! Those are head canons for another time hehe >:)

————————————

Bruce Wayne

I believe he's the only one in the bat family who knows the worth of money while having being rich his entire life (ya know, having to use all the disguises he does and going undercover as a normal person a lot of the time)

He definitely offers you a job at Wayne Enterprises, and if you accept he agrees to keeping your relationship under wraps so that no one will start saying that you 'sleep with him for the job'

On that topic if the relationship ever goes public and people start saying that, he will fire them without hesitation

And if it's business partners joking with him about it, he won't stop dealing with them for the sole purpose of covertly crippling their reputation so badly they'll have no choice but to sell their companies to him

You obviously live with him at the Manor, and he insists that everything be paid for by himself only (ya know, richest man in New Jersey and probably the world soooo....)

Bruce is really bad with his emotions, he tends to really repress them whenever he deems them something he's not 'worthy' of feeling or whenever he perceives he has failed at something or failed someone, so the mere fact he confessed his feelings towards you and that he doesn't shun your love is a huge step forward for him. This doesn't mean that he's good at expressing his emotions when he doesn't repress them though, especially not with words.

This is why his main love languages are gift-giving and acts of service, because he shows his love through actions.

Gift-giving as an important love language for him happens because he's very busy both during the day and the night, so sometimes your schedules just don't align or he even has to go off-world with the Justice League and stuff, so he 'makes up' those missed acts of service with lavish gifts

Usually this could be seen as 'throwing money at the problem and hoping it fixes itself' but the thing is that Bruce's gifts are pretty much always spontaneous. He's out and about in his public persona or patrolling as batman, and he sees a storefront with something that reminds him of you or that he thinks you would like. The next logical step is obviously buying it for you as soon as possible and getting it to the manor. Because Bruce is really bad at showing it but the people he loves are always at the forefront of his mind (when he's not being an asshole and repressing his emotions as if the fate of humankind depended on his ability to give his family the cold shoulder and communicating only in grunts and sighs)

———————————— A/n: this was so fun! I love writing head canons because there is no pressure with story flow and how much description and feeling you're putting into it, it's very similar to sharing your thoughts with a friend and that's what endears the format to me so much :) Hope you enjoyed! If you like my work, please consider reblogging and checking out my other works through the master list in my pinned post<3 Love you all🩷

Total word count: 2009

[janeyseymour]

A Piece Of Paper

Summary: You and Melissa have been dating for a while. Marriage isn't necessarily the plan. Who needs a silly piece of paper to solidify the relationship anyway?

WC: ~4.2k

After dating Melissa Schemmenti, second grade teacher at Willard R. Abbott Elementary School, for about a year, the two of you decide to finally jump the gun and move in together. It took a bit of convincing on your end, but eventually, she welcomed the company and companionship that you brought with you. Living together didn’t mean you were married after all. 

You’ve been living together for two years now, dating for three. It’s a nice situation to be in. Neither of you are particularly ready to get married, each of you for your respective reasons. The topic had come up when you moved in, and you came to an agreement that you were more than satisfied just being partners… life partners. The weekday routine of waking up together, occasionally showering together before getting on with your days, breakfast, heading to work, coming home to your person, and then relaxing before heading to bed and starting the cycle all over again is warm enough. But your weekends are always slow, steady, full of comfort and contentedness to do everything or nothing at all. This relationship that you have with Melissa is all you’ll ever need in life- married or not.

It’s a day where you have off and your girlfriend conveniently has a professional development day that, while you are still more than content with your lifestyle how it is, Melissa’s thoughts and views begin to change. 

Because Ava doesn’t have anything against you (you would even venture to say the principal of your girlfriend’s school likes you), you’re able to enter the school during lunch hours and share a meal with your girlfriend and her coworkers. They all adore you, but it does confuse them how someone like you could be dating someone like the redheaded woman. You’re calm and level-headed, and they’ve seen Melissa in her fits of rage. Regardless, they support your relationship wholeheartedly and eagerly.

“So,” Jacob hums loudly as he practically stares down his two coworkers that he’s closest to. “Does anybody have any big news to share with the group?”

You just roll your eyes in good nature at the secondary education teacher. He’s always so nosey, but he means well. You steal another bite of your girlfriend’s lunch, despite the fact that you have the exact same dish in front of you.

Janine and Gregory each share a look, before the shorter woman breaks out into a grin. “We actually do have some news… Thank you, Jacob.”

Jacob looks quite proud of himself, and it’s immediately clear to the rest of the room that this was an orchestrated act.

“So, Janine and I were talking last night, and…” Gregory nudges his girlfriend.

Janine holds up her left hand, and there’s a sparkling ring sitting on her ring finger. “We’re engaged! We’re getting married!”

Immediately, the group of teachers erupts into cheers, shouting their congratulations. It’s all a bit hectic for a few minutes as everyone tries to get a glimpse at the rock before it dies down.

“Damn, Eddie,” Ava looks him up and down once she’s seen the ring. “If I had known this is what I could’ve gotten, I woulda flirted with you way harder than I did.”

“And I would have happily reported you to HR,” Gregory replies with a satisfied smirk. “But thank you. I did what I could.”

“As you already know,” the second grade teacher smiles and claps her hands together. “Abbott is family to us, so of course you’re all invited to the wedding. We haven’t set a date yet, but we’re thinking sometime next year?”

“We’ll all be there, sweetheart,” Barbara puts in warmly. “We’re all very happy for the both of you. What a wonderful step the two of you are taking.”

You don’t think you’ve ever seen Janine so excited, and that woman is always practically bouncing off of the walls with energy.

But then the naive and in love woman looks to you and Melissa. “When do you think the two of you will be getting married?”

“This is your day,” you tell her gently. “Let’s keep the attention on you.”

“But I’m curious!” Janine argues. “I mean… I would love to have a double Abbott wedd-”

“Yeah, no, kid,” Melissa cuts in. “I love ya, don’t get me wrong, but I would rather die than have a double weddin’.”

“Besides,” you say as you lay a gentle hand on your girlfriend’s knee. “We don’t really see a need to get married. We live together, we’re happy together, and we don’t necessarily see the need to have a piece of paper solidify our relationship. But we are truly so happy that the two of you have decided to tie the knot.”

The rest of lunch is buzzing with questions about the engagement and talks of what Janine has already mentally planned for what she and Jacob are describing as ‘the wedding of the century’. Gregory just looks at his fiancee with a love in his eyes that you recognize as the way that Melissa looks at you. Every once in a while, he will interject his opinion though because some of Janine’s plans are a bit over the top.

“Hun, we can’t afford that,” the man says quite a few times. “Not on our teacher salaries.”

His objections don’t deter her in the slightest. She just smiles at him and nods along, claiming she’ll find a lower budget option with the same amount of pizazz. You listen, quietly amused, while your girlfriend takes in the conversation around her. For once, she doesn’t offer up any sarcastic quips. You chalk it up to her not wanting to ruin the moment for Janine and Gregory, but what you don’t know is that Melissa is deep in thought about engagements and weddings, marriage. The way that you so casually explained that you probably would never be married struck a chord in the redhead. She almost sees it as a challenge now to get married.

After about fifteen more minutes of chatter, the teachers have to find their ways back to their classrooms for the rest of the day to prepare and go through the rest of their data while you have to find your way out of the school.

“I’ll see you at home?” you ask sweetly.

When your girlfriend doesn't quite respond, you set a gentle hand on her shoulder. “Honey? I’ll see you at home?”

Only then does Melissa seem to understand that you’re speaking directly to her. “Y-yeah. I’ll see you at home, mi amore.”

She kisses you warmly, and then you grab your purse and exit, calling goodbye to your girlfriend’s coworkers as you make your way out.

You’re lounging on the couch with your book in hand when Melissa comes into the house from work. She kicks off her shoes, and she’s practically straddling your lap before she even drops her bag on the floor next to you.

You kiss her back passionately before pulling away with a giggle and a rosy tint to your cheeks. “Oh!” you giggle out as she continues to chase your lips. “My love, not that I’m not enjoying this, but what did I do to deserve this greeting?”

She doesn’t answer, instead just kissing you with desire and hunger- she’s being greedy. You can’t do anything but give in to what she wants, but air quickly becomes a necessity.

Her eyes are blown wide with lust for you, but you know you have to get her to talk to you before you can do anything else. “Baby? What’s going on?”

“I’m just so damn in love with you,” she mumbles as she starts to graze your neck with her lips and teeth. 

That’s all you need to hear before you allow her to lower you to a laying position on the couch, throw your book haphazardly, and have her way with you.

It’s a bit later that your legs are still shaking just slightly, but you’re clean and your clothes are back on. Your girlfriend just nuzzles into your hold, humming as she cards her fingers through your hair gently.

“My girl,” she whispers as she dots a few sweet kisses to your head. “Mine.”

“That I am,” you chuckle softly, still in somewhat of a haze after the mind-blowing couch sex. “What’s got you acting like this?”

“Just a day,” Melissa tells you as she kisses you again on the lips. Then she sighs. “Can we just call for delivery? I’m exhausted, an’ I don’t feel like cooking.”

You don’t quite know if she’s exhausted from the professional development day, or if she’s exhausted from the effort she just put in to satisfy you, but you hum and nod your agreement.

“Chinese?”

“Chinese,” you agree.

As you’re waiting for the food to come, your girlfriend decides that she needs to shower. You lounge in the living room, feet tucked beneath your figure, when your phone begins to ring. It’s your mother. Of course it’s your mother. With a heavy sigh, you reach for the ringing device on the coffee table. 

“Hey, Ma,” you answer.

You can hear how delighted she is that picked up. “Hey, sweet girl. Just calling in to check up on you. It’s been a while since I’ve heard from you.”

“I called you yesterday,” you deadpan.

You can practically see your mother shrug into the phone. “And a lot could’ve happened in a day!”

You can’t help the laugh that comes tumbling out of your mouth before you begin to fill her in on your day. You tell her how you were off from work so you were able to sleep in, and then you went to Abbott for lunch with your girlfriend.

“Oh, and how is Mel?” your mother asks.

“She’s good,” you promise. “Tired after today, so she’s in the shower, but I’m sure she’d tell you hello if she were here.”

“Good. The two of you need to come up for dinner sometime soon. Your dad and I aren’t getting any younger, you know.”

“I’ll talk to her,” you promise. “Oh! You know what did happen at the school today?”

“What?” It’s clear that your mother is intrigued. She’s been to Abbott as a guest reader in your girlfriend’s class, and has therefore been privy to the redhead’s coworkers. 

Melissa exits the bedroom, wet hair still clinging to her pajamas when she hears you talking to who she can only assume is your mother on the phone. Usually, she would walk right into the room, calling out a greeting as she takes her place beside you. But something in her stops herself, and she listens to your words just out of eyeliner.

“You remember Lis talkin’ about her coworkers, Janine and Gregory?” At your mother’s hum, you continue. “They got engaged. Wedding next year.”

“Oh how wonderful for them. Let them know I said congratulations,” your mother smiles into the phone. “Hey, when can I expect the two of you to finally pull your heads out of your asses and get hitched already? I want grandkids, you know.”

“Ma,” you sigh and roll your eyes. “You know Lis and I aren’t really planning on getting married.”

“And why would that be?” your mother pries, despite the fact that she’s well aware of the reasoning. 

“Because,” you chuckle. “I’m in no rush, if at all. And Lis has done marriage and divorce before. She don’t want to get married again, and that’s more than okay with me. Besides, we live together. She’s practically my wife as is. Who says we need a silly little paper to tell us that we’re together forever?”

“All I’m sayin’ is, I want grandkids. And you could use the insurance from the school- yours is shit. You can only claim it if you’re married. And, God forbid anything happen to either of you…”

“Ma, we already have all of that sorted out,” you try to reason with your mom. “We’re in a place where we’re content. I wish you could be happy with how we’ve chosen to live our lives.”

“I am!” your mother protests. “You know I adore Melissa, but I want grandkids!”

“I can give you grandkids without being married, Ma. But don’t hold your breath. I’m in no rush to have kids, if I have any at all. And Lis is practically a mother to twenty five children as it is with her job.”

Something in your mother finally gets her to relent. “I suppose I’ll just have to move onto your sister.”

“Yeah,” you snort out. “You do that, Ma. Just don’t tell her I sent you her way.”

“Oh, you know I’ll be sure to tell you you sent me to her,” your mom teases you.

You roll your eyes. “How are you and Dad?”

Melissa sees this as a good opportunity to enter the room, with your mother telling you about her day and what she and your father got up to today.

“Ma?” she whispers. You nod, and during a brief pause, the redhead calls her greeting into the phone.

“Mel!” your mother grins into the phone. “How are you dear?”

“Just fine, Nel. Tell Rick I said hey too when you get a chance.”

“I will dear,” your mom promises. And then she’s off and telling you more about her day. She chatters on for a few minutes before the doorbell rings. It’s your food.

“Ma?” you interrupt her gently as she tells you about the chronicles of her canasta game. “I hate to go, but our food just got here, and I’m starving. I’ll call you soon, yeah?”

Melissa stands to answer the door as your mother reluctantly lets you go, but only after quite a few promises of calling her again soon- coming up for a visit.

The redhead is already sorting out your food from the bag when you’re finally able to end the phone call, and she looks to you with a smirk. “Just a catch up call?”

“Just a catch up call,” you groan. “Woman acts like she hasn’t talked to me in years when I called her yesterday. She says to tell Janine and Gregory congratulations by the way.”

Melissa nods and hands you your pair of chopsticks and food before grabbing her own. You gently drape your legs over her lap with a smile, and green eyes are rolled fondly.

“So, anything else happen once I left Abbott today?” you ask.

Your girlfriend huffs. “Yeah. Loads of bullshit, that’s what happened today.”

She launches into some story about Ava and the data analysis, how the way that they retained their reports was deplorable- a school to prison pipeline really. You can’t help but chuckle at the way she explains the details, loudly and with lots of emotion. Your eyes go soft as you remember just how in love you are with the woman in front of you. The way that she cares about her students and her employment so much is… she goes above and beyond, really.

“Oi,” Melissa nudges you. “I’m over here talking about the school to prison pipeline, an’ you’re giving me lovesick puppy dog eyes. What the hell?”

You lean up and kiss her sesame chicken stuffed cheek gently. “I just love how passionate you are about your job and your kids. It’s really admirable. I wish I cared about my job that much.”

“You know what else I’m passionate about?” your girlfriend chuckles quietly and winks at you. Then she wiggles her eyebrows.

“Jesus, Lis. Always thinking about sex,” you roll your eyes, but a smirk is evident on your face.

“You’re sitting here in booty shorts and a sports bra with your legs draped over me, and I’m not supposed to be thinking about sex?” Melissa challenges.

“We had sex before the food got here. Eat your dinner,” you roll your eyes once again as you pick up another piece of broccoli with your chopsticks. 

The two of you finish you meals in relative silence as the television plays softly in the background, your girlfriend in her head and thoughts about what had been revealed earlier that day in the staff room, and then what she had overheard while you were on the phone with your mother. 

It’s not much later that the two of you are heading to bed, and Melissa just can’t keep her hands off of you- and not in that way. You know that you were joking about sex earlier, but you’re both so exhausted you don’t even know if you could manage right now without falling asleep. Her arms are just wrapped around your frame as you brush your teeth, as you comb your hair and take off your makeup. Her chin rests gently against your shoulder blade, and you feel a soft kiss being pressed to it. She doesn’t detangle herself from you even as you make your way into the bedroom. The only time that she lets you go is when you crawl into bed. Still, almost immediately once you’ve settled under the covers does she attach herself to your side again. Her head rests gently on your chest, red hair splayed out underneath of her.

“I love you,” Melissa whispers softly.

You press a warm kiss to her temple, muttering out a soft, “Love you too, Lis,” before you allow your eyes to flutter shut and sleep to take you away.

While you’re sound asleep, your girlfriend stays up for some time thinking about everything that had taken place today. Is… should the two of you get married? Your mother made a few good points. She knows you want kids at some point, and being on her insurance would probably beat the shitty insurance that the district offers her. And God forbid something happen to her, she would want you to be taken care of- you would get the house, her belongings… everything. But what you had said was true- the two of you were practically married as is. You’ve been together for three years, you live together, you’ve been through good times and bad. You don’t need a paper to prove to the world that you love each other.

But… she finds that she wants that stupid piece of paper. Melissa realizes that calling you her partner, her girlfriend, the love of her life that she isn’t married to just isn’t enough. She wants to have the privilege of introducing you to new people as her wife, as Mrs. Schemmenti. And she can’t do that if the two of you aren’t married. Silently, she decides that she might just have to fix this situation she’s found herself in.

The two of you wake up in a warm and sleepy haze. Melissa’s arms are wound tightly around your waist, her face practically in your chest from when you had turned in your sleep. Your legs are tangled with hers, and you’ve never woken up so warm and light.

“Good morning,” you whisper as you kiss her nose softly.

She just smiles. “Waking up next to you everyday, it’s always the best part of my day.”

“Stop trying to charm me,” you chuckle. “You already got the girl, and there’s no way that my bedhead and morning breath is the highlight of your day.”

Green eyes are soft and full of love as she looks into your own. “I promise you, my love.”

You lean in to kiss her.

She’s clingy the rest of the day, like how she was last night. And while it’s not unwelcome, it isn’t quite like your girlfriend. Yes, she likes to touch you- she’s usually not all that far from you while you lounge around the house on a lazy Saturday, but today you can’t seem to escape her hold. And if you do, it’s because Melissa is up and getting you a cup of coffee, grabbing the television remote from the other side of the couch, or she’s draping a blanket over you when you shiver. But as soon as the task at hand is complete, she’s right back to you- arm draped over you, kissing your head, tracing patterns on your thigh as you read, just simply enjoying your presence. 

You let her do this in silence- you don’t mind it. But it does confuse you. For the morning, you simply chalk it up to still being exhausted from the previous day, but even a time where she should be refreshed and back to her normal self, she isn’t.

Finally, around two in the afternoon, you can’t quite keep it inside of you anymore. You have to know why she’s acting like this, and without an apparent reason.

“Lis?” you crane your neck to look at her. She’s currently sitting behind you and massaging your shoulders as you watch television.

She answers by dotting a few kisses to the slope of your neck.

“Lis,” you repeat again, and you have to fight the moan that wants to come out of your mouth. Her hands and lips are almost irresistible. “Honey.”

“I love you,” she whispers against your skin.

“I love you too,” you smile softly and turn in her arms. “But babe, I gotta ask: why are you so lovey today?”

“Am I not allowed to spoil my girlfriend?” Melissa asks you.

You chuckle and kiss her softly. “You definitely are, but… I’m not forgetting an important day for us or anything, am I?”

“You think I need a special day to show you how much I love you?” she retorts.

You shake your head. “Well, no, but-”

“I love you,” your girlfriend tells you. “That’s all.”

You chuckle and kiss her again. Although you don’t believe her, something had to have happened to have her acting like this on a random Saturday, you relent. “Okay, honey.”

You let her continue to be clingy- it’s not like you mind it. Melissa is always so hellbent on showing her tough side, and you absolutely melt at being privileged enough to see the walls come down and her heart show. She continues to shower you in words of affirmation, and the look in her eyes is a look of love, but it’s different from the usual love you see.

The two of you are cooking dinner in your loungewear when she takes hold of your left hand. She brings it up to her lips and kisses your ring finger specifically.

“Lis?”

She just hums in response before pulling you in close and continuing to tend to the pot that she’s stirring.

“Honey?” That was odd.

Melissa looks to you. “What?”

“What was that?” you ask with a raised brow.

She smirks at you before casually replying, “I think your left hand might look better with a couple rings on it, don’t you think?”

“What?” Your jaw drops at her words, spoken as if she was telling you about the most mundane things in life, not marriage.

Melissa kisses the side of your head. “I’ve been thinkin’.”

“Clearly,” you chuckle softly.

“Can I admit somethin’ to you? Without you gettin’ mad?”

Your brows furrow. “What did you do?”

Your girlfriend’s hands immediately go up in surrender. “Nothin’ bad, babe. I just… with Janine and Gregory getting married, your words about not needing a silly little paper did something to me. And then… yesterday when you were on the phone with your ma, I may have heard you tell her I was practically your wife anyway.”

“You are,” you confirm. “But I know you don’t want the legalities of it all, and I’m okay with that- I told you that when I moved in.”

“What if- what if I don’t want just ‘practically’ no more?” she asks hesitantly. “What if I want it officially, and to be able to introduce you as Mrs. Schemmenti, my wife?”

Your eyes widen slightly. “I mean…”

“I’ll put it to you this way,” Melissa sighs softly. She pauses to stir the contents of your meal again. “When… when I married Joe, I knew it wasn’t the fairytale I imagined as a kid. So when it didn’t work out, yeah- it sucked. The circumstances made it suck a lot more. But… I don’t feel that way with you. I feel like everyday is a dream when I wake up beside you. You’re the… the miracle I’ve been waitin’ on.”

Tears begin to spring to your eyes at her vulnerable and meaningful words. “R-really?”

“Really,” she whispers as she kisses your head again. “An’ I’m not sayin’ we need to rush anything, but I… I think we should think about next steps. Ring shopping, an engagement, maybe a small, low-key wedding?”

You nod against her. “I- I think you’re on to something.”

When Monday rolls around and Melissa, now your fiancee, walks into the staff room of Abbott Elementary with a sparkling ring on her finger… well, she can only smirk.

“I guess I want that stupid piece of paper after all.” And then when she sees Janine’s face, she quickly adds, “And no- we will not be having a double wedding."

TAGS:  (and let me know if you want to be included!): @schemmentis @thesapphictimelady @marvel210 @itisdoctortoyousir @morgana-larkin @doesthatsuggestanythingtoyou @marvels--slut @sweetcheeksschemmenti @megamultifandomtrashposts @lemz378 @http-sam @melissaschemmentisbranzino @imaginesmultifandoms @sexysapphicshopowner @lilfartbox1 @maybe-a-humanbean @imlike-so-gaydude @a-queen-and-her-throne @notinmyvocab @melanielaufeyson @dvrkhcld @cosmichymns @sasheemo @m1lflov3rrr @ricejucie @temilyrights @emilynissangtr @squinnchy @dopenightmaretyphoon @emeraldoceansstuff @shinyfaerielights  @blkmxrvel @marvelwomenrule @sarahjohannson @casualfoxwitch @babytakeittothehead

[obscurevideogames]

Tumblr’s Core Prodct Stratgy

Here at Tumblr, we’ve been working hard on trying to keep our sinking ship afloat for as long as possible. This means desperately trying to copy every new fly-by-night social media app that some multi-billionaire sh*t out during their daily Peloton routine. What follows is the strategy we're using to accomplish the goal of user growth. If you find the things we say here worrisome, please understand that is our exact intention. You've outgrown our target demographic. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

The Diagnosis

It's lookin' pretty bad y'all!

After somehow losing hundreds of thousands of users during the great pr0n purge of 2018, we started to wonder if anything could be done to get back to where we were. We even brought in a management consultant who charged us a ridiculous amount of money. It would make you sick if you knew how much, but we got a few nice meals out of it at least. Anyhow, we handed this guy the app, and HE HAD NO IDEA HOW TO USE IT! It was f*cking hilarious! But suddenly it all clicked -- our users are a bunch of stupid idiots who can't even do basic arithmetic. I mean, they spend all day looking at their phones, so what do you expect?

Tumblr’s best feature is its unique content and vibrant communities. But who cares, right? We're just as happy getting traffic from people sh*t-posting memes, vague-booking, giving out-of-context hot takes to news events, and spewing whatever random thought is in their head at the moment. Plus that stuff doesn't p*ss off Apple.

To keep this thing going we need new people. And by "people" we mean teenagers, like we used to have back in the good ol' days. Unfortunately we're all in our 40s now, so we have no idea what they want. But teenagers are so cool! Imagine if they talked to us like we're one of them? We're getting hard just thinking about it.

Our Guidng Principls

To make Tumblr cool again, we must address these huge glaring issues.

People can look at a blog without logging in. How is that fair to all the poor schlubs who had to fill out forms to get an account? Also we haven't figured out a way to force ads onto the personalized pages yet. But we swear that's not the main reason.

People can see content they are looking for or linked to. People can keep up with blogs they follow. But the problem with this is, people don't know what they want. We know what they want! We're smart. We wrote this damn site, remember?

Promote posts that incite pointless conversations. Posts that are guaranteed to bait every troll into responding. Isn't that why all your Magat relatives love Facebook so much? We can do that!

P*ss off your content creators in every way possible (see #2).

Create algorithms that throw an unending barrage of irrelevant content in your face. Have you seen Instagram lately? We could do that so easy!!!

The app is slow. The website is slow. Obviously this is because of GIFs. Facebook and Instagram don't allow them, so why should we?

Conclusion

Our mission changes on a day-to-day basis. Right now we're super jealous of all the attention that new Threads thing is getting. We're still not sure what it is, but we're gonna download it after work.

[aishabbbb]

You're just so cute!

Part 1 Strawhats x affectionate! reader Can be read as platonic or romantic Synopsis: You love giving out compliments, especially to your crew mates. Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, Usopp, and Nami

LUFFY

Likes the compliments, especially after Nami berates him.

LOVES compliments on his strength the most, but will beam if you call him smart(since no one else does TT)

Call him pirate king or the greatest pirate and he'll fold immediately.

He is fine with it generally.

Except for being called cute.

Will 1000% pout about it, especially if you call him that in front of Usopp or Chopper cause he wants to be cool yk?

"I'm not cute! What type of pirate is cute!"

Eventually will come around to it begrudgingly(he secretly enjoys it), but will also say it back to you to get you annoyed.

Backfires so bad.

Will try to compliment you back but he kinda sucks.

"You smell like the best meat in the world!"

— Or he is actually very heartfelt and deep out of nowhere

"I love how your eyes dance with the stars."

ZORO

Hates it

Ok he doesn't ACTUALLY hate it, but will act like he does

He will get all fussy about it like "Yeah, whatever." and huff off somewhere.

Will blush anytime you say anything nice about him(all the time) but NEVER lets you see it.

Actually comes to love the attention from you.

ESPECIALLY about his strength and skill.

Call him the best swordsman ever and you MIGHT see him blush since he'll be so off guard. Just might.

Will compliment you back in private, especially if you're dating.

Isn't one to focus on looks when appreciating someone, but will if you just did. Mostly points out your skills.

After some time, he won't feel embarrassed at all and will get a little cocky.

"You are so cool!" "Of course I am."

"Wow Zoro, you are strong." "Just strong? Give me more credit."

HATES if he see's you complimenting Sanji near him.

Brags to him about how cool you say he is.

NAMI

First thinks you compliment her to get out of paying her.

"I'm not going to forgive your debt by sucking up to me."

Once she realizes it's genuine, she changes her attitude.

Feels all giddy inside whenever you say anything sweet about her.

She will smile brightly to you and say thanks whenever you do so.

Doesn't have any compliments she dislikes at all

But she appreciates complimemts on her character a lot more.

Being a (former) theif and conartist makes people have a pre conceived notion of her

So saying she's nice or kind makes her feel very happy.

Will compliment you back a lot.

Mostly on skills and character.

But she does forgive some of your debt because you are kind.

USOPP

Flustered.

He starts stuttering before saying of course!

Tries to stay cool about it but say he is cute or hot and he disappears

With his self esteem, he feels like you don't actually mean what you say.

He WILL ask for assurance if your dating

After realizing you mean it, it will make him feel better about himself

Specifically about his fighting skills

He doesn't think he is that good but you think otherwise

Feels more confident the more you appreciate his talent

Brags about it to everyone

Will uplift you too

Originally to reflect your praise, but later on as actually genuine.

SANJI

Will evaporate

This man gets soooo flustered.

If you thought Usopp was bad, he will redefine the word.

He just can't commute.

Just tries to have any response but ends up babbling.

Honestly, his flusteredness is so cute.

He will get a nosebleed and may faint depending on the type of compliment.

Call him hot or cool and he will get a nosebleed or faint.

Especially if you say he is cool.

But say he is nice—

This man will freeze.

Feels like he doesn't deserve such praise. Especially from you.

Tries to reject the compliment and compliment you back.

"B-b-but Y/N dearest, you are the most kindest, nicest person to EVER grace this earth!"

You never let him reject it.

So he just ends up accepting the praise.

May cry a little sometimes, particularly if you say he is a good person.

Man NEEDS a hug TT

Starts showing off in combat and in general so he can receive praise from you.

Will do something cool and look at you like a puppy until you notice him.

If you don't he pouts off somewhere else.

He will also brag to Zoro about how cool you think he is