#i mean it's a good thing to have several fics you're proud of

[nokomiss]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💗

Thanks for passing this to me, @secretlystephaniebrown! This was SO HARD. I went with current faves, since all-time favorites was too difficult. I've written way too many fics, just picking out five was a real challenge, and I didn't even touch on some major fandoms or some fics that were really important to me. But here's my list!

The Startling Secret Identity of The Batman - (10k, T, Gen) In-universe Buzzfeed Unsolved accidentally stumbles on Batman’s secret identity. The Batfam reacts.

I wrote this fic so fast, like it just suddenly appeared on the screen, and I'm still delighted with how it turned out.

The Haunting of Wayne Manor - (31k, T, Steph/Cass, Gothic horror AU) Stephanie Brown arrives at Wayne Manor to be governess to Bruce Wayne’s young son, Damian. Once there, she begins to suspect the manor is a place shrouded in darkness and secrets, where the shadows seem to follow her, where doors lock mysteriously and questions go unanswered. And most dreadfully of all, her own secrets are just as likely to catch up to her and bring her to ruin.

All my love for gothic horror was thrown into this fic, and I'm really happy with how it turned out.

in this town of halloween - (3.8k, G, Gen) The Riddler takes ten-year-old Steph trick-or-treating, and Steph honestly has the best time ever.

Okay so I had to limit myself to ONE fic centered around Stephanie Brown's Unconventional Childhood, because that is absolutely a theme I keep going back to. There's just so much untapped potential! But this is the one I ultimately chose, because it's light and fun and I just loved the mental images that inspired it.

those wild charms for you - (5k, T, Steph/Jason) “So you’re saying we should go on a fake date and catch a serial killer so that we can have the moral high ground over Bruce,” Jason said. “Just to be clear. That’s what you’re suggesting.”

listen i love this pairing so much. I have so much fun writing them. And this one has the bonus of being one of my favorite tropes!

our lips are sealed - (B99/MCU crossover, 5k, T, Gina Linetti/Steve Rogers) When Gina started talking about how Captain America moved in next door to her, complete with a rap breakdown including the lines, "with his glorious American-made booty, it's a star-spangled thing of beauty," and how she was initiating a five-step plan to tap dat, the precinct just assumed that Captain America was a nickname for whatever unfortunate hottie made a real estate blunder and ended up her neighbor.

This fic has the honor of being one I can reread without cringing, and it even makes me laugh. I feel like I got the voices right, even though this is my only foray into B99 fic.

[blakbonnet]

*DRUM ROLL* This AOTW is the podfic edition of our beloved weekend celebration of great artists in this fandom, and our featured artist this week is none other than @lindie-kninjaknitter ✨ If you're a lover of podfics, you've definitely heard at least one of Lindie's 265 fics either on your commute or because their voice is just so calming. Lindie also agreed to answer some questions for me:

Let's start with the technical: what are the programs you use to create your lovely podfics?

I use GarageBand to record with a ShureMV7 microphone, and I use Audacity for processing and post on SoundCloud.

How did you get into podficcing? Is this the first fandom you've tried it for?

I got into podfic making I knew what a podfic was. The story “No One Would Riot For Less” by sacrificethemtothesquid was a retelling of season one from Ed’s POV. I couldn’t put it down. So I recorded into the Voice Memos on my phone so I could take it with me on walks. When I found out that this was something that people do, I asked the author for permission to post and they said yes, and with the encouragement of some generous kind pirates in the comments I recorded more.

What made you fall in love with narrating stories?

This is the only fandom I’ve recorded although after I did a few stories, I auditioned for some books on audible and have recorded two stories there. It was not as rewarding or enjoyable as recording fanfiction. I love that the audio out there helps people in the ways it does. Folks tell me they listen while they do boring tasks or enjoyable art or their commute. I feel like I get to sit in the corner of a room in so many peoples lives, reading these awesome stories and it makes me very happy.

Any tips for beginners who wants to give podficcing a shot?

Tips for beginners! There are some good resources on AO3, the sapphires project, tree change project… These were designed to try to support new podfic makers as well as get those stories to audio. But I think the most important thing is find a story you want to live in! Something you really, really love, and then record it on your phone or whatever you have. I didn’t have a microphone until I started Hell or High Water.

Sound quality wise the two big things you need to do are to get your voice through a recording device and onto your DAW (digital work station – mine is GarageBand) While at the same time, eliminating other noises as much as possible. Echo is not your friend so a bathroom is your worst option… a place with soft walls blankets carpet on the floor in a quiet corner works great. Or a closet.

What is your favourite podfic that you've narrated?

My favorite podfic is which ever one I’m working on right now! There are some I am particularly proud of the vocal performance. Throat G.O.A.T. stands out… Constellationism, Baddy Zaddy have such sense of place! Captive of the Pirate King was the first one in which I really felt part of a community. I’ve made… 260 so far… each one was my favorite as I worked on it!

What are your personal challenges when it comes to narrating podfics?

I always want to do more than I can reasonably actually record. In choosing one it means I’m unchoosing several others.

I have dyslexia… sometimes I cannot get into the flow of reading which is frustrating.

There are some topics and materials I find difficult to narrate. Often that discomfort is offset by many other things that I love about a story and so I will narrate them anyway.

When I am approaching difficult material, I do a lot of journaling. I take breaks. I record sentences in pieces, then stitch it together and I am pretty sure you can’t tell in the finished recording.

We have a wonderful community of narrators who are there to listen and help each other with things like this.

Why OFMD? 🥹

Why OFMD? I think the underlying story of figuring yourself out later in life really appeals to me. I see myself in many of the characters, Ed, Stede, Jim, Izzy, Lucius… This story and the crew have really helped me understand myself better… feel less broken? (Chapter 25 baby!!!) feel less of an outsider? To recognize that parts of myself that I’ve had to tone down my whole life are worthy of being loud about.

Please head on over to @ofmdlovelyletters to leave your love for Lindie 💕

[bvttoneyes]

Claustrophobic

summary- in which you Ethan, Benny, and Sarah all get stuck in one confined space.

tw- claustrophobia, cursing, tbh not really bad.

It's really not that much about the relationship, you can just ignore those parts if you just want one big fluffy group(ish) fic. Sorry this like really sucks, I'm not proud of this at all omg.

established relationship (Ethan x reader)

The nerd hunt. It was a shock to no one that your boyfriend and his friends were geeks, but what was a shock was when they wanted to go hunting for some weird monster geek shit. The only ones that complained were you and Erica. The only difference is you went, she stayed home. Probably going to a party instead. You just wanted to go to have more time with Ethan and hang out with him.

"So where are we even going to?" You ask while getting in the back of Benny's grandma's car. Ethan had gotten in after you.

"I don't know exactly the place's name but it's-" Ethan had started before he was interrupted by an excited Rory.

"To an underground cave!" Rory had exclaimed, "we're going to look if there’s gonna be any mummies in there!"

While Benny and Ethan rolled their eyes, you and Sarah just laughed at the pure excitement from Rory.

"Well I'm going to tell you ahead of time, there is a low chance of finding any mummies in a cave?" you inform him while laughing.

Benny starts the car and has to give it a second before starting your drive there. About 20 minutes into the drive Ethan held your hand, he was definitely nervous about it, hyping himself up the 20 minutes that had passed.

After about an hour of driving we arrived at the cave, that was when I realized exactly how this was going to be. It was a small entrance, meaning it was a tight tunnel.

"Is now a bad time to mention I'm severely claustrophobic?" you asked the general audience of the car while chuckling.

"seriously? we live in a place where vampires, witches, and just monsters are like most common... and you're scared of tight spaces?" Benny says annoyed.

All you could do was roll your eyes at him as Sarah, Ethan, and Rory get out of the car. Ethan helps you out of the car aswell.

Once you all have been walking in the caves for a while, you realize that these halls are actually huge. Until you all see an elevator. An old, tiny, elevator. It was the only other way to go than from where you had come in from, which you wouldn't even remember how to leave.

You all go in on the tiny elevator, once the elevator started shaking you could feel your body going off. You were sweating, clinging onto Ethan's arm, nauseous, shaking, and there was so much weight on your chest that you couldn't breath.

"I can't do this, i told you i cant do enclosed spaces, especially you etha-" you start to yell.

The elevator stops. The doors didn't open. Now you really start panicking. A million words in your head at once, several conversations happening at one time in your mind just to overwhelm you. You wanted to sob, scream, cuss out everyone in the elevator. Except that wouldn't help anything. So you check your phone to see if you have service, of course you don't. You're more than 20 feet underground. Then Benny starts banging on the walls of the elevator.

"If you're a nerd, act like one. That won't help." You yell at benny.

You try to pry open the doors, didn't work. Rory was smashing the open button, but still it wasn't opening.

That's when you had this idea, "hey vampires, what if you took us up to the top of the elevator and got us out of the hole thats already open! Because ya know, super strength, ability to fly, can't die if you fall and what not are good ways to help us out in this kind of situation." You explained as calmly as you could while you still feel like you couldn't breath from the amount of pressure on your chest.

Sarah and Ethan look at you, agreeing with you that we should do that. Meanwhile Rory hadn't payed attention to a single thing you had said just now.

Except they were able to do it successfully, it's also quite safe to say that you were all running out the way you all came out. You and Ethan running hand in hand out.

Once you all made it out of the cave, you and Ethan were the first ones out and you two stood next to the entrance to the cave. Not wanting to block the exit/entrance.

"Are you okay? How are you feeling?" Ethan asks you, trying to catch his breath.

"It's okay, I'm okay." You tell him, hugging him and putting your face into his neck.

He hugs you back. He had tried to help when you started freaking out about the elevator but then it stopped and you all had to figure out what to do to get out. All he did was hold your hand the whole time.

Except it was enough to help you both think straight.

"ugh get a room." Benny said groaning as he saw you two, he and the others were walking slow out of the cave finally.

i do NOT give permission to copy or publish my work onto any other sites, dm me to translate any of it. otherwise there is no given consent for translation of @s3xiel4ss .

hey thats my masterlist!

Finished Writing: Fri May 24, 12:28 AM.

Count: 846 words, 4491 characters, 69 sentences.

[strwberri-milk]

Being a bit indulgent (bc I'm sick) and asking for a sick fic Kae, Diluc, and Zhongli please. It can be either his s/o or the boys themselves I don't mind! :)

oh i hate being sick i cant fucking breathe and nothign tastes good its jawoefjawofa god

Kaeya is the most miserable man alive when he's sick. The less severe the illness the more dramatic he is. If he's actually so sick he should be staying home he feels so guilty for being useless that he'll do everything he can to get work done and avoid being useless.

However, if he's just down from a cold and just coughs every so often he's got more than enough energy to rain hell down on you for not cuddling him enough for being a sad, sick man.

He isn't good at staying in bed either way. He walks around constantly or tries to bother you or be a busybody. Staying in one place isn't really something he's interested in doing, and him being sick just makes it significantly worse. He gets even more restless when confronted with the fact that he really should be resting. Telling him what to do makes him want to do the opposite, so it can be very counterproductive.

Whenever you're sick he does his best to take care of you! He's pretty good at it too and you do feel yourself getting better but you can't help but worry about Kaeya's well-being since he holds and kisses you so often despite your illness. You don't want to get him sick but he swears up and down he doesn't care.

His food is definitely...medicinal. He's great at cooking unless it's to make you feel better. Something awful happens and he makes stuff that is good for you, and definitely tastes like it too.

Diluc is also awful at being sick. He's a little better in the sense that he will stay at the winery and focus primarily on paperwork. However, the issue is indeed that he is too focused on paperwork. He doesn't remember to eat or take any sort of medicine. You'll end up having to force feed it down his throat if you want any chance of Diluc ingesting anything that could potentially make him feel better.

This means that sometimes, Diluc stays sick longer than he should since he refuses to eat food. His body is working on fumes at this point, even more so than usual. He's simply a shell of a man when he's sick, mechanically working through his things and somehow finishing them even though he'll have no recollection of actually doing the work once he's fine again.

Diluc also gets very spacey. He isn't all there and sometimes, if you're lucky you get to see the very real effect that fatigue has on him. He easily curls up on anything and falls asleep, inadvertently getting enough rest to the point that it could negate the consequences of not eating.

When you get sick Diluc becomes very anal about making sure you stay rested and eating. He'll feed you himself, finding easily digestible things that can satiate you without turning your stomach.

You might feel like he's suffocating you a bit with his inability to leave you alone but he's working so earnestly to make sure you feel better that you can't mind. He's putting in all his energy to making sure you're alright, and somehow it does work. You think you get better faster thanks to his attention and devotion, something he's very proud about.

Zhongli is the only good patient to have when sick. He's willing to sit back and relax, take his time and really ensure that he gets better quicker rather than later. He doesn't exactly toil through work, but he will get some light tasks done before trying to get fresh air to better his constitution.

He is very particular about the medicine he takes. He just wants to make sure he does it right to avoid any complications, making him again, the ideal patient.

Thanks to all of this, he gets better pretty quickly. Illnesses don't knock him on his ass but he does take some preventative measures after being sick to avoid getting sick again.

When you get sick he's good at taking care of you and giving you space if you want it. If you don't, then he'll be concocting some herbal remedies to help cope with your symptoms in addition to the medicine you take to actually help with the illness. He knows the symptoms are generally the worst part, which is why he tries to manage them as much as possible.

He also likes to just quietly spend time with you in the day as you get some rest, gently running his fingers through your hair as you nap peacefully in the afternoon sun. He wishes that your breathing wasn't so laboured, but seeing you at peace calms his heart just a little.

[shyalia]

Happy One Year Anniversary

to The Day the World Broke by @saladmix!!! She deserves all of the recognition for writing such an incredible and in-depth story, please go show her some love!!

To celebrate and show my immense appreciation, I spent the last two months working on an animatic for it. It's not perfect, but the vision is there and I'm honestly proud of myself for completing a major project like this. 100+ frames later (not all of them made the cut, unfortunately) it is finally complete just in time for the anniversary!

I'm about to ramble, I apologize in advance lol. Feel free to scroll down to the next blue text to see the animatic, please mind the spoiler and trigger warnings!

This fic is so important to me and holds a special place in my heart. I came across the first chapter the day it was posted, so early that it didn't even have any hits or kudos yet. The title and little description intrigued me so I clicked on it, and I'm so glad I gave it a chance because I was hooked from the first paragraph. Little did I know how much it would impact me that evening after raving about it to my best friend, during and after reading it. I'm not kidding when I say it has been on my mind every day for a full trip around the sun. Its AU is so unique that I haven't read anything like it before. The writing is beautiful, the storytelling is captivating, and the characterizations of the boys are so in-depth and relatable and a joy to read, the plot is insane and every chapter blows my mind... I could go on about it forever!!

I've read that first chapter more times than I can count, and the rest of it several times as well because even at 300k+ words, every single word is worth the time and energy. I'm always finding subtle details that are easily missed in earlier chapters that come up again later and I have a "WAIT HOLD UP" moment, like @saladmix is a genius I swear. When going back through chapters to locate details for my artwork to make it as accurate as I can, I always find myself getting lost reading because it just pulls me in, even though I already know what is about to happen... it's just that good.

Honestly, I can't get enough of this story, it means sooo much to me. It has inspired me to become a better artist, to have the courage to write my own stories, my enjoyment of reading has been rekindled, and most importantly, it brought friendship. @saladmix is such a kind person, she is so supportive and funny and a pleasure to talk to, I'm thankful to have her as a friend. Keep on being awesome, girl!!

Okay, I'll stop rambling and let y'all see this animatic that I worked so long on! xD

Please be forewarned that it contains spoilers up to and including chapter 23, so if you have not read that far and want to avoid spoilers, save this to watch at a later date!

TW for brief images of knives and guns, and for light sensitivity as some very bright frames come up. I apologize if you're sensitive to those types of things!

[doyouhearthunder]

On Pros and Antis and the Confessing of "Sins"

If you're in any way involved in fandom spaces, and in particular fanfiction, you've probably heard about the ongoing debate between proship and antiship schools of thought. It's a perpetual drama machine that I have tried to stay clear of, to avoid incurring the wrath of the 'pitchforks and torches' types, but I feel I can no longer stand on the sidelines while my friends take abuse from terminally online Unreasonables. So I'd like to set the record straight on a couple things.

First though, since we're dealing with amorphous internet terminology that means 100 different things to 100 different people, here are some quick definitions as I see it:

PROSHIP is the more reasonable, nuanced and mature stance of the two, defined as the belief that there is no automatic correlation between individual morals and the consumption or creation of fictional media. Proshippers believe that all facets of life, even darker and more taboo topics, are fair game for fictional exploration and creative expression (even in the common context of NSFW fetish material). The key point here is that one should have a healthy ability to separate fiction from reality and an understanding that finding enjoyment in darker subject matter does not somehow make one a bad person - although moral lines obviously can and should still be drawn regarding improper behavior towards real people, it does no one any good to limit creative expression or paint creators with a broad moral brush.

ANTISHIP, on the other hand, is a reactionary movement in response to the above. Antishippers believe in drawing a hard moral line in the sand around some topics and discouraging creative expression regarding them. Antis defend their conservative worldview by attempting to take a moral high ground, making themselves out to be the reasonable ones and decrying any criticism of their position as tantamount to condoning the indefensible. But the problem with antis is more one of behavior than motivation; they may think they're defending the innocent, but they function like a loaded gun pointed in all the wrong directions. Anti rhetoric is often characterized by sweeping black and white moral standards and purity tests, leading to targeted harassment campaigns, harmful slander and willful distortions of reality, and attempts to ostracize targets from fandom communities and turn public opinion against them.

It's also worth mentioning that the burden of these culture war campaigns against "inappropriate" and/or NSFW content often falls more heavily on queer and marginalized creators, due to internalized transphobic rhetoric and fear-mongering, while cis people who consume or create similar content often skate by unnoticed, shielded by privilege or anonymity.

To demonstrate my point: I am the creator of several popular SFW fics, but I'm also the creator of several popular NSFW ones. For years I've been writing "darkfics" with subject matter that could be considered extreme or controversial, under the pseudonym of SubordiSins (a more common story for many of your favorite fic authors than you might think, I should add).

My best-known (and best) work under that handle is a fic called Reindeer Games, a novel-length erotic torture porn thriller. RG was written as a collaboration between myself and @kimberlyeab, a talented and prolific fic writer and a dear friend. I'm quite proud of our work together: We took a simple premise and gradually expanded it into a twisty, emotionally complex character-driven drama. It was also, frankly, some of the most fun I've had writing anything. It's important to me to be clear that while the subject matter of RG is an acquired taste (mind those Dead Dove tags), the fact that I wrote it on an alternate AO3 account does not mean that I am in any way ashamed of it.

In addition to being a fantastic creative partner, Kim has done a great deal to uphold the most basic benefit of fandom: providing like-minded fans with safe, accepting online spaces through which to forge friendships and express themselves creatively. I've definitely found my online tribe in Kim and their friends, as have many other notable fic writers.

However, Kim has also been a magnet for controversy, in part because of our collaboration on Reindeer Games, but mainly because as a queer online figure who openly writes smut, they make a good target for hate. They have directly suffered from the crude transphobia of chuds and 4channers, the vile slander and sustained harassment of unhinged and obsessive Tumblr stalkers, and even email bombs and doxxing campaigns that pose a threat to their IRL safety and security.

Through it all, I have tried to be a supportive friend while also benefiting from a shield of insulated anonymity that means I get to be impervious to harm from writing the same fics that they get hate for. I originally took that approach for my safety, but I'm tired of feeling like I have to choose between self-preservation and being fair to my friends. We never meant it to, but the unequal footing created a wall between us and lead to hurt feelings. I've had enough of it, and so I'm finally bringing that wall down.

To summarize:

Proshippers are good people more often than not, and antis are often dangerously obsessive, inappropriate, and untethered from reality.

Fiction cannot be held to the same moral standards as reality and if you don't understand why, I don't know what to tell you other than "Give it some more goddamn thought."

Nobody needs to meet someone else's arbitrary standard for moral purity tests in order to deserve being left alone and not harassed.

Having kinks is normal, and most of your favorite fic writers have probably written about their kinks, even if not openly. As ever, the golden rule of fanfiction is and has always been "Don't like, don't read."

Just as it is the responsibility of fic authors to tag their work appropriately, it is the responsibility of internet users to make use of content filtering and block features to curate their online experience and protect themselves from material that upsets them. It is *no one's* responsibility to police what other users post online.

Anyone who throws around accusations like "p*dophile" or "gr*omer" without concrete and substantiated evidence of actual wrongdoing (aka, a lot more than just fics or kinks) is not a serious person.

Kimberlyeab is a cool and sexy person and anyone who tries to hurt them must go through me as well.

Any complaints about my/Subordi's fics or the contents thereof can be mailed to the following address:

Doyouhearthunder 69 Fuck Off Ave Proshiptopia, FU United States of Mind Your Own Damn Business

Any praise for my fics can be directed to my inbox. <3

Thank you for reading. I will not be taking questions at this time (except of course from friends in good faith).

God bless all the kinksters and the queers, Nate

[makoredeyes]

Hello, I hope you're doing well! This is probably an odd question, feel free to ignore it. I wanted to ask you as a fellow writer I admire, who is mostly focused on unpopular/dead/deep lore characters. Do you also sometimes feel like what you're writing is irrelevant and unexciting for everyone, except yourself? If so, how do you deal with this? For me sometimes this sudden realization is so crushing, that I cannot bring myself to finish a single work.

Hello! That’s not an odd question at all in fact it feels pretty relevant tbh. (Omg sorry long reply you got me going 💙)

I think I have several kind of interrelated answers for you so let me lay them out.

1- I am powered by autism and a MIGHTY hyperfixation. I have no choice I am compelled. I am blinded to all other things and so while the little bit of feedback that I do get is AMAZING and so extra sparkly motivating it is not entirely what compels me (but BOY does it help)

2- I joked with a friend just last night that, “this season is, as usual, does not have NEARLY enough Felwinter content and so I must therefore create my own.” - as she pointed out, there have been exactly TWO seasons with ANY Felwinter content at all and I wasn’t playing destiny yet for one of them. My point being, sometimes you gotta create what you want to see yourself. I’ve always found myself in some really niche corner of whatever fandom I’m in and have to do this a lot. Probably how I got to writing and drawing etc. fun thing is tho you find a really special group of people who think and love like you that way, and if it’s a smaller crowd, it’s all the more intimate for it Imo. I’ve made some super special friends in the last 9 months or so in my weird little corner here and it’s magical and I think that quality over quantity filter is awesome. (But yeah i know the validation machine is SO good too)

3- the BEST magic of borrowing from obscure content, generally unknown or undeveloped characters or lore is the creative freedom. The headcannon swapping the worldbuilding the background gathering… the RESEARCH! Gleaning what little bit I can from what we DO have. Who the fuck is timur?! We don’t know. I borrowed the beautiful designs for his face and general personality that Sylenth has developed because she’s done such an amazing job and was kind enough to allow me to play with him as she made him, and took that as jump off point for my writing etc but I have all the wiggle room in the world with but a few widely dispersed canon signposts to lead my direction and that is just so fucking fun for me.

(And that doesn’t mean more mainstream characters like Osiris don’t have their creative appeal to me either. I will deep dive on lore and character analysis for YEARS but living in the peripherals is comfy for me)

Those are all the positives to my work, but yeah, sometimes I do feel a little dejected. I have definitely felt a drop off in reader response weirdly in converse to the effort I put into my writing. Housefire has evolved into much more of a cohesive Plot(tm) that is going somewhere very specific from its origin of a few interlinked fluffy anecdotes and funnily enough about the time I started really digging my heels in and plotting and planning and putting in twists I was REALLY excited about, people started responding less. Some of my favorite fics are the least popular. Some of my art I am most proud of gets the least attention but that damn doodle of poor Felwinter getting splattered by a warsat has 200+ more notes than my next most popular art. (The shitposts always win Damnit! 😩🤣😅)

I get frustrated and yeah sometimes a bit discouraged sometimes and I spend Way Too Much time sitting here refreshing my notes because I am a sad lonely person chronically online just way too thirsty for a little validation or a conversation with someone but like. Every piece gets better. Every piece SOMEONE appreciates. Every piece **I** enjoy and is also a chance for all of that when I share it with the world and that’s exciting and good, and like I said the people in this community as niche and little as it is, are really something special, and some of the people that have come into my circle because of it make it SO worth it.

**I was done but then I read your ask one more time and I’ll add this since it popped into my head last-second:

If we are creating works for dead characters we love, we are keeping them alive.

How magical is that??

[ckret2]

What is the equivalent of the phrase "Oh my God" that Bill uses? Is he mentioning some god figure from his home dimension or is he using “Oh my me” or “Oh my Axolotl”?

He doesn't use anything.

Have you ever heard an atheist say "oh my big bang" instead of "oh my god"? In common usage, the word "god" in "oh my god" is merely part of a stock phrase and not a declaration of belief. In fact, changing "god" to another term would instantly make it more religious, since if you just say "oh my god" it's like "well maybe they believe in a god or maybe they're just using the phrase," but if you say "oh my [something else]" it's like "they DEFINITELY believe in [something else] so passionately that they changed the phrase just to emphasize how much they believe in it."

If Bill ever used the phrase, he would use it like a foreign word pronounced omaigohd that's just an exclamation that communicates a specific emotional meaning to English-speakers (anger, shock, excitement)—and he's not going to get all cutesy while speaking a foreign language to draw attention to something irrelevant. This exclamation isn't an avenue to announce his religious beliefs.

There ARE issues he feels passionately enough about that he'd break away from common English. Unless he's in "pretending to be human" mode, at any place where a human would naturally refer to themself as "a person," "a woman/man," "female/male," "she/he," Bill will refer to himself as "a shape," "a triangle," "triangular," "it," even in contexts where that sounds weird to the humans. His gender is triangle and that matters to him. Religion does not.

At any rate, there's no [something else] he could fill into the phrase. He knows for a fact that there are figures powerful enough to alter reality—he is one. He suspects on good evidence that there are even more powerful figures that can conjure an entire universe from nothing—he is not one. He considers "power" and "divinity" to be separate things, he doesn't think powerful figures are divine, and he doesn't think the divine is real. He thinks "god" is an artificial social label, like "king," that only exists when enough people concur that it's real and stops existing when enough people stop respecting it. He thinks "god" is what the weak call the powerful when they've been fooled into thinking the powerful deserve worship. He thinks he's one of the powerful that fools the weak. He doesn't think he's a god—except when he's lying to himself very well—but he loves how it feels when other people call him a god, so he encourages it. He doesn't consider anybody god, he doesn't obey or respect any authority, and generally the more powerful a being is, the more he dislikes them on principle. One trillion years ago, the beliefs he was raised with were the sort a white American boomer experiencing a religious crisis would insist are "spiritual but not religious." He briefly thought gods might be real in his youth, but never worshiped any.

But all that aside—his vocabulary simply doesn't include the phrase "oh my god." He doesn't want to imply he even might worship something—he's too proud and that pride is too fragile. If he has to make an exclamation, it'll be something entirely different—"Oh boy." "Oh, come on!" "You're kidding me." "Seriously?" "Whoa!" "Wow!" "No way," maybe hysterical laughter—whatever's fitting in a given situation. Several times in the fic I've had to go find a different phrase where if he was another character I could've just put "omigosh".

[tsarinatorment]

Hi, Tsari! I am quite new to the Trials of Apollo fandom and new to the whole Percy Jackson Universe in general. I have already read some of your fics and they are all so beautifully written with the perfect wording and eloquence. All those heart-warming scenes that totally could fit in the actual books always warm my heart. Thank you.

I have a question though. Sorry if you've already answered something similar.

So, I'm thinking a lot about that scene where Apollo admits he forgot Yan, Gracie and Jerry's existence and I think that's only because of the whole mortal brain is so weak thing. He cares about his children even before they would arrive at Camp. As the God of Knowledge, he must remember everything especially people he loves. So, do you think would he feel embarrassment or guilt after ascending into Godhood again?

I think he would definitely apologize to them and basically re-introduce himself and would tell them he loves them no matter what happens and he is so proud of them how they handled themselves at Nero's tower. I just imagine a cute scene with lots of tears from the kids as well as from him. Also, first his kids would be definitely worried why a powerful God would want to talk to them. They don't know Apollo yet and Will or any other of their older siblings one day would just nonchalantly drop the bomb that they should go to the cabin bc Apollo is waiting for them to talk about something. They would definitely be terrified even if they got some stories about how Apollo is a chill, lay back father. But knowing something and experiencing something is two different things.

Oh, the angst, can you imagine? Poor Apollo is already on the edge blaming himself for his stupid mistake thinking he would never be able to repair their relationship and the first thing he notices that his kids are afraid of him. And then throughout the scene everything resolves and the kids understand that they are allowed and encouraged to express their real feelings and opinions even if that is not so flattening or respectful towards their father. And now they know what their older siblings mean when they say their father is different from the other Gods. So, happy end. Sorry for the long ask.

So, the actual ask is that do you think would he apologize and if yes, how would he do?

I don't know I just love that 3 new kids and there are so little stories about them. I just need them be cute with Apollo. Apollo is a good father and he cares about all of his children.

Hello! Welcome to the fandom, and I'm glad you're enjoying my stuff (I've spotted your name in my emails quite a lot recently; very much appreciated :D)

The TON Trio, as they're usually nicknamed, are fascinating on several levels, because of how they appear and what Apollo says about them, and while it's not something you mentiooned specifically in your ask, the first big question that always crops up with me about them is - how were they claimed?

Like, clearly they are - they're in Cabin Seven, no-one has any doubts that they're his kids - but also, they arrived while he was a mortal. Apollo himself couldn't have claimed them, but if they were still unclaimed they'd be in Cabin Eleven, even if they knew in advance that they were Apollo kids, because camp can't run the risk of putting kids in gods' cabins on their own word because what if the kid is lying? You'll have offended gods left, right and centre and that's not a good thing.

Apollo, ofc, we know would be delighted to let any kids stay in his cabin if he could, but camp politics (or more likely, Zeus' paranoia) has said no, and that still doesn't equate for the slighted gods whose offspring they actually were, etc... But I digress a bit here.

So: Apollo is mortal, Apollo cannot claim his kids, but his kids have still been claimed. This is where my various thoughts about Apollo being the patron of the camp etc. come into play, but specifically the headcanon I have that none of his kids have ever spent a night unclaimed in the camp - the theory that makes the most sense to me, personally, about how the TON trio were claimed, is that Apollo, when first setting the camp's protective borders up (because he was clearly involved with that), built in some sort of catch-all, where the camp can claim his kids on his behalf if he doesn't do it by sundown etc. Given he's the camp's founder, I don't think it's unrealistic to assume that would have been possible to set up, and it also explains how the TON trio are claimed without his personal intervention.

Why did Apollo set something like that up? Because he is, honestly, a good father (by god standards - he is, of course, a terribly neglectful one by mortal standards, but he's very clearly the best of the godly parents, as evidenced by how his kids act around him compared to what we see with other godly parent-demigod child relationships, yes, even Percy and Poseidon, but that is an essay for another time I see that ask in my inbox about their relationship, person who asked; I will get there eventually). His kids adore him, Will is not afraid to call him out on things, Will is not afraid to call out people trying to claim Apollo wants them all dead (see: BOO) even when his dad's been silent for months...

And this all suggests that Apollo is very present in his kids lives (again, by god standards). Will points out that Apollo not answering prayers for a month is weird enough that it worries the cabin, and I don't see why Apollo's dream visits needed to start when they arrived at camp.

So this is a headcanon of mine, admittedly, but I think Apollo lingers in his kid's dreams periodically their entire lives. They just don't know it's Apollo that happens to be the reoccurring figure in their dreams until they get to camp and he can finally introduce himself.

Where does this fit in with the TON trio? Well, this headcanon of mine means that Apollo's been in contact with them since they were very young, too. They don't know it was him, they don't know their absent father is a god, but the contact is there - and then it stops, but it's just dreams so maybe they grew out of that particular dream?

But then they get to camp, they're claimed as Apollo's kids and told by Will, Austin and Kayla about what's happening to their dad at the time. They learn second-hand about the figure in their dreams, and maybe they're disappointed or even resentful that they didn't hear it first-hand, like their siblings did, but they learn.

Then Apollo gets to camp, and he doesn't really recognise them but they don't recognise him, either. This isn't the sunshine goof in their dreams, this is some average-looking teenager with a broken nose that they first saw passed out like a loser in their cabin. It's awkward all around.

Apollo even comments on that, that none of them really react to him, either as their father or as a god. It's all a bit awkward and stilted between them and it's not the meeting any of them, TON trio or Apollo, were hoping for.

So yes, I do think that after this is all over, he spent time with them, back in the form they were familiar with (while this was never mentioned in the epilogue, he definitely spent time with all his kids, not just Will, so it would've happened them). Introduced himself properly, with all the recollections of them back in his mind, possibly even re-claimed them, so they knew that they were, without any doubt, both his and loved.

I don't think they were ever scared of him, though. It's a little hard to be scared of someone you've always known, even if you didn't know it at the time, and also of someone you've seen so low in their own life, especially when your siblings are so comfortable and happy with them.

Not the arrival at camp they deserved, or that Apollo wanted for them, or that in hindsight they wanted, either. But in the end, a little bit out of order, it would have happened.

[leothil]

Truth or Dare Tag Game

The lovely @mistmarauder tagged me in this, and I thank her for the distraction as I'm desperately trying to make time go by until I can leave the office!

Which friends/mutuals would you call to hide a body?

@clusterbuck because she's close by and probably has good ideas. @bibibuck because she's proclaimed her willingness to die for me several times. 😌

How many user subscriptions do you have on Ao3?

I am subscribed to 74 works and authors on Ao3 :P

Do you have a crush on someone? OR If you're with someone, tell us one thing you love about them.

Not actively, no.

What does the last DM/text you sent say?

Term ends last week of may

List the three friends/mutuals with the best takes.

@hattalove @glorious-spoon @bibibuck

Share one of your favorite fics of all time.

a good day to be by @hetrez. Literally life-changing for me, because I picked up a new hobby because of it.

List three of your favorite content creators.

@eddiediaaz @captain-hen @bilosan

Write one thing you love about yourself.

I've learned to do it scared, and I've gotten so many wonderful experiences out of that little piece of courage!

Which fandom of yours (past or present) has the best fics?

I've actually not read for many fandoms, believe it or not. So even though there's a lot of bad stuff too, most of my favourite fics come from 9-1-1.

Which creation of your own are you the most proud of?

I think my post on introduction to tv ratings still is a pretty good guide for people who don't know what the numbers mean (even though showbuzzdaily has stopped reporting ratings, RIP they were my favourite site 😭). The post I wrote about giving positive comments on articles about bi Buck also got a lot of attention, and I was really happy to see that it actually seemed to have gotten people to do so!

Have you ever read RPF?

Oh yes!

Tag the mutual(s)/friend(s) most likely to get away with murder.

@capseycartwright because she has the right kind of Connections

Tag the mutual(s)/friend(s) who know(s) the most about you.

@clusterbuck has seen me first thing in the morning, which I don't think any other mutual has been subjected to.

Now tag some friends to play!

All aforementioned people, and in addition @buckactuallys @oatflatwhite @messyhairdiaz @tripleaxeldiaz @onward--upward

@ellelans @elvensorceress @dancing-mylife-away @transboybuckley @shitouttabuck

@burnthatbridge @thatsveryood @bewitchedbewilderedbisexual @eddiebabygirldiaz @henswilsons

[ravensmadreads]

Positive Reinforcement

Rating: T? (for me being a Tease) 18+ !

Pairing: Jack "Whiskey" Daniels x f!reader

Summary: oh god don't make me do this. This is a Tattoo Artist Jack Daniels AU that @fuckyeahdindjarin lovingly coaxed me to write and now here we are.

Warnings: cursing. bad writing? People being idiots? Yearn? Idk fam I'm new to this let me know

A/N: lots of love to @barbiewritesstuff for listening to me panic about this and for reading this and for letting me be a disaster about pedro despite not even being in the pedro fandom ! ily 💙 also this is my first fic AND first time writing fiction AND English isn't my first language AND I know nothing about tattoo artists or tattoos in general so I ask you to forgive the multitude of sins I'm about to commit.

Tagging: @fuckyeahdindjarin (you're the master and this is my humble offering) @barbiewritesstuff (i gotta be a menace) @chronic-ghost (all the italics for you bby) @sherala007 @oscar-wilde-thing @perennialdoll247

P.S the gif isn't related to the fic but damn guys its a gorgeous gif?!!

Oh.

Oh God.

This was a bad idea.

This was a no good, top of the line, terribly stupid idea; and that was saying something coming from someone who'd once pulled a double shift on nothing but 7 cups of espresso and half a chocolate bar.

So maybe your track record for making sensible decisions wasn't stellar, and somebody should've talked you out of getting a tattoo. But it was far too late for that now.

The needle was buzzing away happily; stabbing tiny pinpricks into your skin and your heart was trying to beat itself clean out of your chest. Although, the very handsome man, with the very wonderful biceps, and the inexplicably sexy Stetson, currently leaning over your arm might have something to do with that. Might have several somethings to do with that in fact since he's the entire reason you're in this predicament in the first place. 

****

Jack "Whiskey" Daniels.

Proud owner of the tattoo parlor right across from the quaint little diner you co-owned and worked at. He'd given you a grin and taken your breath clean away with a "thank you darlin', that's mighty sweet of you"  the day you'd welcomed him to the block with a box of cookies. Sufficient to say, you'd been a goner since then.

After four months of long distance pining, smiles exchanged across windows, (you'd dropped a fork the first time he'd grinned at you from across the street but that was nobody's business but your own), the very rare small talk, and borderline bullying from your bestie Ginger, you had summoned the courage to go ask him out. And promptly panicked at his front door.

Because how were you supposed to talk to one of the most perfect specimens of the male species you'd ever seen? When you knew next to nothing about him!?

Except for his coffee order from when he'd walked into the diner one fateful day.

It had been a slow day and you had been lamenting your lack of love life with Ginger when the front door bell had jingled to announce a new customer. 

You'd twirled on your spot in front of the cashier and had been well in the middle of your welcome spiel before glancing up. Jack, in his infamous leather jacket, had been giving you a warm smile and you'd made a strangled squeak, to Gingers great amusement, before closing your eyes and trying to disappear into the Earth.

When that had failed, you'd taken a deep breath, counted to 5, before opening your eyes and regaining the ability to speak. He'd watched the entire thing with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes but graciously hadn't called you out on it. His parting smile and "you have a great day, honey" had been soft and you had caught yourself grinning about that smile, and that stupidly adorable pet name, throughout the entire next week.

Still, one coffee order and gentle smile didn't mean you could walk up to him and ask him out! He could be in a relationship! He could be married! He could turn out to be a total prick hiding behind a charmingly soft Southern accent!

Although, in that case, this little crush would be over and you could tell Ginger to suck it. Your mental spiral into the abyss had been interrupted by the door opening and the man of the hour himself poking his head out; his brows knit in concern. 

"Everythin' okay, sugar?"

The sight of his brown eyes so close to you had thrown you for a loop. You'd gaped at him for half a minute before blurting out the first excuse that came to mind. You vaguely remember convincing him that you were here for a tattoo and rambling about always wanting one and him opening up shop right in front of you, seeming like a sign from the universe. (A sign that you were losing it? Maybe. A sign to get a tattoo. Probably not.)

He had taken your weird behavior as first time jitters and had led you in for a consult. He'd eased you into the shop, a hand on the small of your back, while recounting the story about how a drunk tattoo had earned him his infamous nickname. You'd been giggling too hard to notice that he'd already sat you down on a couch in the back and pulled out a sketchpad.

He had been all soft smiles and twinkling eyes and thoughtful ideas. While you had been a bundle of nervous energy; trying and failing to not stare at his pretty eyes, long fingers and sharp jaw. You're pretty sure he'd caught you checking gaping at his hands several times. But nothing in his demeanor had changed, apart from the appearance of a mischievous little sparkle in his eyes. Which had only made it harder to resist the urge to jump his bones right then.

You ended up agreeing to a small design (that you had totally fallen in love with), and he had given you an appointment for the very next day. Your protests had failed at his insistence and you'd just been able to nod around the lump in your throat when he squeezed your arm in reassurance.

"Trust me darlin', you're in safe hands. I know what I'm doin'.

A furtive glance at said hands and another nod from you had sealed the deal. (Best keep your mouth shut until you were sure that words were going to make it out instead of embarrassing whimpers.) He'd smiled at you as he walked you out with a particularly devious look in his eyes. Like he knew. Like he knew exactly why you were here and insisting on getting a tattoo. And you couldn't decide if that would be the best or worst thing to ever happen to you. 

****

It was too late to do anything but reminisce now. The tattoo is halfway done and you're not one to brag but you'd made it through without too much fuss. A particularly vicious stab has you hitching a deep breath as you try not to flinch and suddenly, Jack's locking those soft eyes with you. 

"You gotta stay still now, sweetheart okay?” he rumbles, his voice low and throaty. 

Oh God.

That voice.

He could tell you to jump in front of a train with that voice and you wouldn't even blink. Your gaze drops to his mouth as his tongue peaks out to dart across those plush lips. You're caught up in the images of that tongue flicking out and tangling with yours. Figuring he'd be sweet at first; gentle and soft, with just the tiniest bit of pressure. Before licking hard and playfully biting your lower lip as he pulls away. Grinning that mischievous half smirk that makes you want to grab fistfuls of his hair and yank-  

He clears his throat and you fall back to Earth. Gulping, your eyes meet his amused stare and you nod cheerfully in response, trying not to be completely transparent. Apparently you fail miserably, because Jack just sends a knowing smirk your way before carrying on.

"That's a good girl."

Oh.

Oh God.

This was such a bad idea.

You were going to explode right in this seat.

The hum of the needle starts again and you try to shift your focus. Your gaze draws, as always, to the man bent over you; his broad fingers encircling your arm and gently holding it in place. His eyes laser focused on the design. Your gaze moves to ogle his broad shoulders and the way the muscles ripple under the leather jacket covering him. He tilts his neck and you trace the skin trying to pinpoint the exact point you'd like to sink your teeth in. Okay enough! Suffice it to say, you definitely wouldn't mind being under him in a different context.

You nearly squirm at the thought of his broad body on top of yours, but catch yourself just in time. Wouldn't be out of character for you to mess up your first tattoo right near the finish line. That would be quite the story. 'O hey, nice tattoo, what's that squiggle at the bottom?' 'Oh. Yea I was just picturing getting cracked like a glow stick by my tattoo artist when he had a needle on my skin.'

You hold back a flinch and wriggle in the seat when Jack raises the needle from your skin to start a different line. Those caramel tinted eyes rise from the half etched pattern on your bicep and fix onto you as he looks over with a raised eyebrow. 

“Behave darlin’,” he coos. “We're nearly there. You’ve been doin’ so well for me. Let’s not get carried away now.” 

Oh. 

Oh fuck.

This was a really bad idea.

You gulp and grit your teeth and nod for him to continue. You're thinking of kittens taking baths, ice cream in the park, that absolutely terrible but totally worth it for the eye candy vampire movie you'd seen last weekend, and how bad your issues with yourself had to be for you to get something permanently etched into your skin than tell a handsome man that you might like him. Mentally shaking your head at yourself, you glance over to see how much of the tattoo was left. Which turned out to be a mistake. 

"Ack!" You cry out.

Fist clenching and arm twitching immediately, as you watch the needle touch a sensitive part of your skin, and you flinch badly. Jack lifts the needle and fixes you with a stern half glare. But there's a twinkle in his eye that has you giving him a sheepish grin. 

"Whoops?"

You pout at him, with a teasing tilt of your head. He chuckles and your eyes flicker to his lips for a beat too long. When you look up, Jack's smirk has turned roguish as he catches you shamelessly checking him out. Again. 

Oh no. 

"Maybe you just need some positive reinforcement sweetheart, hm?"

Before you can even process the statement, he has already shut the needle off.

"Such misbehavin', darlin'."

He tuts at you before leaning down and pressing his lips against the corner of your mouth. He smells like leather. And a soft cologne. Both of which assault your senses; hints of pine mixed with sandalwood and something inexplicably him wraps around you, and it is dangerously delicious. His tongue darts out to have the tiniest taste as his mustache tickles the corner of your lips. Before you can restore the brain power needed to tilt your head, and maybe pull him on top of you by the lapels of his jacket, tattoo be damned, he's already pulling away. 

"Fuck me."

The whimper that leaves you is entirely involuntary.

He grins at your flustered face as the needle starts again. His grip on your arm tightens and you squirm for entirely different reasons as he winks at you.

"Absolutely. But only if you're good and hold still now sugar."

Your jaw drops. There's nothing but static in your brain.

Wait.

Did he just- ?

Oh God.

"Be good for me now honey. 'M almost done. And then we can see about rewardin' good behavior." 

Fuck.

This was the best idea you'd ever had.

.

.

.

.

****

[professorspork]

I hope this doesn’t come across as like a pushy “update pls” I promise that’s not how I mean it. I’m curious at what point you feel like a multi-chapter fic is ready to post? Do you write it in its entirety and then edit chapters in between updates, write and edit it in its entirety, write most of it and continue writing the rest between updates? I’m very curious about your process since you’ve been writing some monster word count fics

I really appreciate you asking!

The short version is that I've learned over time that what works best for me is completing a work in its entirety before I start posting; above all I like posting on a reliable schedule for my audience, and I simply do not write quickly enough (or coherently enough) to do that any other way. There are a lot of reasons for that and I WILL ELABORATE ON THEM AT LENGTH:

I have several multi-chapter WIPs from the Glee days-- when I was in college-- that I never finished because I'm a delicate hothouse flower when it comes to maintaining hyperfocus, and I found a new fandom to be in before I could complete them. Back then especially, I was much less disciplined about writing sequentially: I would write parts of the story wildly out of order, focusing on whatever interested me most at the time. That means my hard drive is a graveyard of unpublished content, which sucks-- not only did I never give my audience the resolutions they were looking for, but I never got to receive feedback on parts of the story I was really proud of. I found that really dispiriting.

Going to grad school for screenwriting really helped me focus on telling a story in order, because there is literally no other way to write a screenplay than one scene at a time; it's far too reliant on momentum and consistency to jump ahead to "the good bits" and come back. I also did several projects-- writing my multi-chap Frozen&Tangled polyamory epic for a friend's birthday; pre-writing all my 2015 Cartinelli Week one shots far in advance so I knew they'd be perfect come posting day-- where I had a deadline I wanted everything Done By, which got me in the habit of writing to completion before posting. It wasn't something I thought I was going to be capable of because I'm like Tinkerbell, Finn, I need applause to live feedback is incredibly motivating to me, but having the ability to go back and change things in chapter 2 if I realized they weren't adequately setting up what I wanted to do in chapter 5, or whatever, proved to be just as powerful a motivator in a different way-- it meant I could tell the stories RIGHT, if I took my time with them. I also learned to get at least one cheerleader I could leak snippets to as I went, so that I still got the dopamine hit of the feedback even though I'm ages away from posting for real.

I also found that, as a reader, I always really appreciated when authors could stick to an update schedule so I could look forward to new chapters like I would episodes of television. It's not a standard I expect from anyone, but it is something that makes me really happy-- and the two ways to do it are to either write fast enough that you're just constantly churning out new content (not an option for me, especially on the occasions when I'm actually employed and can only write on weekends) or to pre-write and then slow release. it gives me a feeling of... mastery, I guess? Like "hey everyone here's a gift I'm giving you," as opposed to writing and updating when I can, which makes me feel like I'm always chasing something (BEING chased by something?) and risking losing my audience/my own fickle concentration if I were to wait too long.

My "ONLY post after everything is done" rule is a new one, because I burned myself on rely on certain certainties, the last D/s epic I wrote (lmao can you tell this topic interests me). I worked on that for a year and was 132k in with no end in sight when I started posting, but I was part of a Kristanna discord at the time, and I wanted to seize the audience I had before it disappeared-- which is always the danger of movie fandoms, which never have as much staying power. I had hoped that because I had such a big buffer I could keep writing ahead of the updates as they came up from behind, but I tapped out at 172k when I finished the end of an arc. That kills me, because I have SO MUCH unreleased content for that story which will never see the light of day, because-- again-- I'd let temptation win and wrote ahead to The Juicy Bits instead of forcing myself to go in order.

So, two things I've learned:

Only ever outlining the juicy bits that come late in the game, instead of lovingly finessing their every word, is a great way to trick motivate myself into continuing to write in order so that I can GET to the juicy bits, full stop; if I don't exorcise them they keep haunting me and that helps me stick it out until the end

By holding stories back until they're complete, I give myself the ability to complete them because I'm able to dig myself out of holes I've written myself into. In the old days, if I got stuck because I realized the real root of my issue had come chapters earlier and that's why it's not working now, I'd just... be stuck at that wall, unable to move forward, and that would be that. The idea of going back and editing a published story for narrative content is mortifying to me and something I personally could never do, so-- this way I'm giving myself more tools and options, so that I can tell the story I want to tell and tell it right.

In terms of my actual process, I tend to work like this: my most productive time is when my ADHD meds are at full power, so in an ideal world I am writing new content from like 10am to 3pm or so, getting as far as I can in New Content. Evenings, when I'm no longer in Hyperfocus Productivity Mode, I'll go back and reread things-- sometimes chapters from much earlier-- both to entertain myself and to make edits and changes. Often, that's just moving words around here and there for cadence and flow; rarely, it's adding whole new moments or thoughts to the chapters. I try to write In Order as much as possible, getting chapters beta'd as they're completed. I'm a nitpicky perfectionist, so keeping a hold on my early chapters until everything is posted means I can change them over and over and over again without anyone knowing but me, which I love-- and those changes are getting made right down to the wire. even when the fic is "complete" and I'm "only posting" I'm still making edits; some of people's absolute favorite parts of Newsbees were added literally the night before, when it was the "get everything into AO3 and do the final pass for typos and formatting" stage. Like, Penny writing sudokus on the fly for Ruby at the hospital? Ruby thinking in Adam Font? Those were 11th hour strokes of genius.

So yeah-- that's a very long-winded way of saying that I've found writing to completion first not only makes me more likely to actually finish my WIPs, but it makes my WIPs BETTER because it gives me far, far more time with them. I know it's not something that works for everyone, but in terms of my own sense of like, duty and responsibility and goal-setting, it keeps me on track without risking Guilt completely paralyzing me-- which is what happens when I post as I go and then get interrupted.

THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY RAMBLE.

[threerattsinatrenchcoat]

Snippet Swedsnesday!

I was tagged by @graysparrowao3 .

No pressure tags: @aviatorasharak @beesht

Today I'll bring snippets from a fic that I think should have way more love and a WIP

I'll Write to You in Flowers

Lae'zel quietly watched him tie individual bundles of clippings and arrange them in the larger one. "Which is me?"

"This." He pointed to it. One long stalk of proud red plumes, several inverted stalks of compact buds, and a collection of delicate, star-shaped flowers. Lae'zel's assessment was correct; they only suited each other in meaning.

Lae'zel's lip curled into a sneer. "Showy. I am not showy."

"That is a gladiolus. A noble flower. It symbolizes integrity, strength, victory and loyalty."

Her face softened. "Accurate. What of the rest?"

"Borage. Symbolizes bluntness. Directness."

The sneer was definitely a smile now. "And the one that is upside down?"

"Lavender."

"It smells… acceptable."

"Lavender, upside down, means trust. And tied with the ribbon on this side, it signifies that this spray represents my feelings towards you."

"You feel you can trust me."

He nodded.

"You will tie it both ways, then," she harrumphed. "What of the rest?"

(You can read more on AO3)

The Moth and the Wasp

(WIP, working title, coming out... one day..?)

A total value of 635g in collectable spoons (to the right bidder) balanced on Mattis's face. Silfy offered another spoon, but just as he got it to catch on his cheek, the door slammed open. A skinny, short tiefling stormed in, mouth twisted into a scowl. One he hadn't seen in months. Ever since she ditched him, Silfy had been the one to handle talking to her.

"Mol!" he grinned, mostly out of habit.

"I've got work for you," she said.

"Oh, now we're good enough to work with?"

"Don't tell me you're still sore about that."

In a fantastic impression of Mol he said, "We're a crew! You're my ride and dies!" Back in his normal he added, "Then you ditched us in Baldur's Gate. Yeah, I'm a little miffed. Perturbed, even."

"It was temporary. I was setting things up in the city. I got you in, didn't I?"

"Alfira got us in. She made me cut my hair! I'd had some of those mats since Elturel! They was my friends, wasn't they?"

Silfy nodded.

"Well, both of you and me, we're friends!" Mol said. "Hells, Mattis, never thought I'd argue with you so much over giving you gold. Triple your current rates, too."

His eyes lit up. The only thing he loved more than gold was Silfy, and some days that was debatable. Gold was power. Gold greased their way into Baldur's Gate and was going to grease their way to legitimacy.

"What's the work?" Silfy asked, notepad ready. Ever since she started hawking papers she got real into writing things down. It was a little scary sometimes.

"Theft. Right up your alley."

"Of what?"

"Need to know if you're in or out, first."

"Theft," Mattis mused. He and Silfy were a whole thieving package, sure, but they hadn't done a theft without Mirkon and Meli. Neither were going to come; Mirkon because he was studying now, and Meli because… because…

Still couldn't think about Meli. Right. Fine. Meli wasn't coming, either, that was the point.

"Need you to do a smaller job, before I bring you on," Mol said. "To be sure you still have skills."

"How much is this paying?"

"Nothing. You get the whole payout at the end. That's why it's three times your rates."

Silfy tore off a sheet of paper and passed it to Mattis, who glanced over it, sucked his teeth and said, "Bad news, Mol. Current rates just went up."

"Mattis—"

Riiip. Silfy passed over another sheet.

"Market's wild right now. Current rates are now double."

"Fine! I'll do your old rates for this job and your new ones for the next. Gods, you two are colossal pains in my arse."

"If you could get anyone else, you would've, we know."

[lollytea]

You seem to know a lot about AO3. Is it normal to feel hesitate to post there if you're a new user and after you upload your first ever fic it gets 3 kudos (two of them being yours)?

It's perfectly normal to feel hesitant. Posting your own work is a nerve wracking experience. We're all just creating things for ourselves but we still want to know if we created something that somebody else enjoyed, so wanting feedback is to be expected. Especially if you're new to posting fic and you've never done this before, so you really don't know how much or how little responses you're supposed to get.

All I can tell you is that your readers' engagement will fluctuate depending on several factors, none of which are your fault. Fandom/character pairing popularity mainly. And if its a small dormant fandom, there might not be a lot of people reading. OR if it's a huge fandom, with several works posted in the archive per day, your own fic might get lost in the shuffle. And sometimes, readers just don't realize that authors appreciate their response, but instead just read silently before moving on to the next one.

If you've been writing for a while, you build up user subscriptions. Meaning there will be people who get notified whenever you post. But if you're a new user, you won't have those yet, so you mostly rely on your work being spotted on the archive as soon as you post by those who check the tag regularly. That makes it harder, sure, but still a good means of getting your work seen.

Basically, you have no control over your fic getting attention or not, so there's no point in worrying about it. Maybe it will get noticed and maybe it won't. Give it time.

ALSO. This is unlikely but I just made this same mistake with my own fic, so check your publication date. If its several days BEFORE you actually posted, your fic might have gotten pushed way back in the archives where nobody will see it. And if that's actually the problem, you can adjust it to today's date so it pops up front and center

Anyway, I'm proud of you for writing something and posting it!! Don't be disheartened. Sometimes fics get appreciated and sometimes they get ignored. None of us can control this. We just have to keep trying to have fun and write what we want to write.

[writing-for-life]

for the love your fandom asks: 10, 11, 25?

Oh, they’re all such good ones, @stellerssong

11. If you're a writer or artist, what fic or piece of art are you proud of making?

I’m both, although my art usually flies under the radar because I have hang ups about it, hence hardly ever post it, and if I do, I usually attach it to something else. But I’ll post it separately this time because this is actually one I can sort of appreciate (sorry for the low quality, lifted it off a Tumblr post because I’m on my phone and the hi res is on my desktop):

Writing I’m proud of: The Light of Stars, simply because the feedback I got meant so much to me. If several people tell you it helped them with processing grief, or thinking about their own death with less fear, you know you’ve done something that went beyond a silly little fanfic (I mean, I’m totally committed to Muhulhu of course 🤣), and that honestly mattered in ways I can’t even begin to explain.

My Sandman Haikus, simply because I stuck with them, and they were for the first fandom event I took part in.

I’ll do the other two as well:

25. A piece of advice for taking care of yourself in fandom spaces

Not so much advice rather than what I try to do myself (and since I’m human, I sometimes fail):

Stop engaging as soon as you sense bad faith takes and reactivity. Remember they come from a place of being human or being hurt, and keep that in mind. But it serves no one and will usually create more hurt if at least one, or even both sides, are not in a space to listen.

Have a close circle of mutuals who get you, but beware of echo chambers.

Step back when things stop bringing you joy.

Regularly do something with your hands or your body if you can (you can interpret that in any way you like 😜), and get off electronic devices and social media.

10. A blog (mutual or one you follow) that has made your fandom experience brighter

All blogs I follow make my fandom experience brighter, otherwise I wouldn’t follow them. So if I follow you, or regularly engage with you even if I don’t, you can be sure you make my fandom experience worthwhile, and I always hope I can give back a bit.

I find it impossible to choose, hence I won’t, but I’m leaning towards blogs by people who share my passion for deep (over🤣)thinking and meta-analysis.

But I love all my mutuals, and each of them enriches my fandom experience in unique ways through either friendship (and that has nothing to do with what they do with their blogs), art or story. Or just unhinged shitposting. And sometimes all four…

[johaerys-writes]

For the writer asks! 🌈💝💥🤲

[Writing Asks]

🌈is there a fic that you worked *really fucking hard on* that no one would ever know? maybe a scene/theme you struggled with?

There have been chapters in High-Flying Birds that I struggled with, and it is a fic I continue to struggle with sometimes haha. Mainly because there is so much I want to write, many little moments that are hard to arrange in a coherent chapter or arc, and there are also many things I feel like I have to write (or stay 100% faithful to canon) and that if I don’t readers might be disappointed or *I* will be disappointed with the end product looking back lol. It’s also a fic that I've done a lot of research for, so there were chapters or arcs that were a long time in the making (and one of the reasons why I'm so slow to update it lol...... it just all needs to marinate in my brain). One of the chapters that I struggled with in particular was The Sacrifice, because trying to condense Euripides' 'Iphigenia at Aulis' in a couple of chapters and also make it engaging and coherent was really hard.

Another fic I've struggled A LOT with, and I mean A LOT sometimes, is my DA longfic A World With You. Maybe it was because of my inexperience while writing certain bits, maybe it's the DA lore itself that is sometimes confusing but there were certain arcs that gave me such a hard time. I felt like I kept writing myself into corners and had to delete and rewrite a lot, and it was just pure agony lol. I do feel like I learned a lot through these struggles though so I don't begrudge them too much 😅

💝what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

Ooh good question. I feel like you're a walking disaster and yet- is a fic that I did not expect many people to read-- I expected max 2 or 3 people to follow it but I've been pleasantly surprised by how invested people have become in this story. It warms my heart to see readers care so deeply about these boys; not to get overly personal LOL but I've poured a lot of my heart in it, it almost feels like cheating sometimes because several scenes or exchanges in it are things I or people close to me have experienced, and it's also sort of me appreciating but also heavily criticising the culture I've grown up in (something I hope comes across lol.) It’s so rare for me to be able to write something so close to my own reality that it feels like a niche in and of itself, and I'm so grateful for everyone who has been tagging along.

💥find your least kudos'd fic - say something wonderful about it.

Okay so I'm going to cheat for this one because my least kudosed fic is something I wrote ages ago for an exchange and I don’t have much to say about it, BUT my second least kudosed fic As It Was is one of my favourites because I wrote it for @mogwaei who is one of my favourite people, featuring Solas and their OC Maordrid from their fic Ouroboros, which is one of my favourite pieces of literature! Like ever!! And has had a profound impact on me and I love it and all the characters in it to bits!!! I still go back to this fic I wrote from time to time and drown myself in Mao/Solas feels 🫶 I feel like I captured something that is important to both of these characters, a small part of the connection they share and some of the things that draw them to one another. I'm quite proud of it ngl.

🤲what do YOU get out of writing?

Oh boy that's a good question haha. Like what does one get out of doing anything creative? It's definitely a great pastime. I spend many hours daydreaming/writing/editing/posting, time that I could use to do literally anything else but I just love the feeling of getting immersed in a different world, another person's mind. So escapism is a big part of it too I guess-- focusing on a fictional character's life and problems is so much better than focusing on my own LOL. I can tell you that my anxiety has been so much better ever since I started writing consistently, and it's why it's so important to me to set aside time every day to write.

Another more personal reason writing is important to me is because as an autistic person, writing about people and their feelings and how they interact with the world really helps me understand and process my own feelings and experiences in a way, since that is something I struggle with on a daily basis. And having this routine of writing also helps me gauge my mood/ emotions/energy levels, like I don’t always realise when I feel like shit or why I feel like this or what to do about it, but when I'm too tired or out of it to write I know it’s perhaps time to take a break and maybe reflect on some stuff lmao. And!! Of course!! Writing is great when it comes to processing traumatic or painful stuff. Like when my dad passed away last year I found myself writing a lot about grief and loneliness and losing people/situations that are important to you and not really knowing what to do about it, and I did that without even really realising it so I'm grateful for having this creative outlet that lets me process stuff in a somewhat healthy way lol.

This got unnecessarily long SORRY haha, but thank you so much for your asks 💙💙