#i mean it all depends on your perspective i guess

[misc-obeyme]

Okay, @silverrings-n-prettythings is at it again, bringing my OCs to life~

Look at Caligo (he's a reaper)!

She made him look so cool 😭

I've always felt bad about making him the villain of Unchained. He's not a bad guy, he's just complicated!

Thank you for drawing him, Silver!!!

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

Sorry if you've already covered this, but I was scrolling socials and saw that the San Antonio zoo got a large donation to expand their savanna habitat. The only thing that jarred me as I read through their expansion plans was apparently they're going to be outfitting some 'safari' vehicles so guests can be taken into the habitat to feed and interact with the animals (from within the vehicle). I was always under the impression that this kind of interaction wasn't necessarily good for either the humans or the animals-- is there a way it can be done ethically?? Anyway, I just thought it was interesting!

Ooo, okay, your question aligned with a thing I've been chewing on for a while, so let's talk ~ethics~ and ~philosophy~ aka this is gonna be a bit long. I do promise I'll answer your question, though!

The first thing I want to note is that you're really asking about two different things, which are almost always conflated these days when it comes to talking about animals: welfare (is the animal happy / healthy / safe) and ethics (is what's happening good / moral / acceptable). It's really important that we distinguish between the two, because welfare is an objective measure of physical and mental wellbeing, and ethics are a human construct that involves subjective interpretation.

A useful but highly oversimplified example of this is the bothering of cats for online videos. Pestering a cat to get a funny reaction once in a while may not impact their overall welfare. Welfare is the cumulative impact of an animal's experiences, which means that single acute moments may not weight heavily on the entire balance. If the cat is healthy, fed well, enriched, and has a good and positive bond with their humans, those momentary irritations for videos might not matter much. That doesn't mean that you or I, as viewers, might not still find bothering an animal for internet clout ethical. We can believe that humans shouldn't ever unnecessarily put their pet through negative experiences, and we can think that doing so just because it brings the human money or fame is distasteful. But! We have to recognize that as used in this example, those ethical stances aren't inherently tied to the animal's welfare state. Many people I know who dislike cat-bothering don't care if the animal has good welfare outside of that situation - they don't like that the situation occurs at all, ever.

So, back to your question. You're wanting to know if it's okay for a zoo to have a drive-through aspect of an exhibit where people get to feed the animals. You're asking if it's safe for the humans and for the animals (which is a welfare question) and if that type of interaction is ethical. I could just tell you that of course it's fine, San Antonio is an AZA zoo and their accreditation only allows them to do "good things" but that's now how it works here (nor is it the reality of accreditation).

The safety aspect is one I'm not worried about. It's actually a pretty common thing for reputable facilities to do some sort of vehicle tour in savanna habitats, whether in the guest's vehicle (safari parks) or on a hay-ride type vehicle (zoos). Many of those allow guests to feed out specific parts of their animals' diets. Offhand, I know Tampa and Fossil Rim both have feeding tours like this in a staff-driven vehicle. It's not specified from the zoo's press release, but I can guarantee you that guests will not be driving those vehicles - which means the interactions will be proctored by staff and what people are feeding out will be carefully regulated. The habitat is going to have rhino, giraffe, zebra, ostrich, and antelope/gazelle, and I'd guess that the drive-through is going to stick to those latter two and maybe additional species. Those are animals where a car is an appropriate safety barrier.

As to if it's ethical to do? It's spiny question, because it depends very directly on the ethical perspectives of the person you're asking. I think it's fine - you may not. Let's break down the different things that come into consideration on the ethical side, and my responses:

"The zoo is commercially exploiting animals by letting people pay to get closer." If the issue is that people paying to get closer to animals is using them for money, well, that's the business model of a zoo (non-profit or not, they still need revenue to operate). So IMHO it's not like it's "less ethical" than anything else the zoo is doing, using that framing.

"Zoo animals should be allowed to be wild and undisturbed by guests driving in their habitats." Zoo animals aren't wild, and their entire lives revolve around humans and the human work schedule. As long as a vehicle entering the habitat doesn't have a negative welfare impact (e.g. they're not scared of it), it's not very different from the rest of the routine of managed care.

"Feeding zoo animals will encourage people to try to feed wild animals." Thanks to obnoxiously viral content creators, people are going to try to feed wild animals no matter what. Doing it in a proctored situation where a staff member can try to do some education at the same time is probably the best possible scenario.

"People just do those tours to get close to cool animals." People are always going to want to touch the animals. If being able to pay for a tour keeps them from jumping the fence to try to pet a rhino, great.

There's one more that I want to talk about separately, because I think it's where a lot of confusion gets generated. It's this idea that "Humans shouldn't be interacting with animals at all, any interaction is unethical and bad for the animals." This is a welfare crossover, but not one actually informed by welfare science in a captive situation. And I think it's because the internet lacks nuance. Yes, it is absolutely correct to say that with wild animals, you should never ever try to feed a deer out of your car (or similar). It is incredibly harmful to those animals on both an acute and chronic timeline. But thanks to the rage-bait algorithms on social media and people endlessly justifying doing stupid, dangerous, bad things (and getting pushback for it), there's been a lot of bleed between the public's understanding of what wild animal welfare is and what captive animal welfare is. Combine that with the reality that captive animal welfare cannot be assessed or diagnosed from a single context-less clip, and that people with strong beliefs and no practical experience with the field/species/individual will pass judgement loudly to their audiences...

The result is almost a reflexive believe in many sectors of the internet that any human-animal interaction that isn't couched as a "rescue" is inherently unethical, for reasons people often can't articulate. Which is why, I think, so often people want to support certain aspects of captive animal management but feel guilty for doing so. I see this a lot in the questions the blogs gets, and I'm glad people feel comfortable asking, because it's important to think through not just the individual instances but the patterns leading us to question them.

So yes, I'd say that a staff-led experience in a vehicle chosen for safety is an ethical way to proctor an interaction between guests and certain savanna species. It will vary by facility - I'm always more wary about guests driving, although many drive-through safaris are fine - and by setup. I think what San Antonio is doing will be fine, though, and will be interested to see / hear about the setup when they start up.

If you've got a question about ethical captive management, I'm always happy to talk about it - but I'd invite you to poke around in your head a little and send me not just your question in the ask, but your thinking about why or why not something might be concerning. It's great practice for understanding why you relate to animal ethics the way you do, and where those beliefs come from.

[luckykiwiii101]

Heyhey

First of all,

Much love to you. I know you've helped a lot of people and on behalf of everyone you've helped..a big thank you!

I found something on reddit and it made everything just click in an instant. I'll put it at the end. (for some reason I can't link it) I am sending this to you in the hope that this will really help some people who feel lost.

Sidenote: I know it's basically what you and other blogs has been preaching about, but this is rephrased differently and may help some people understand and truly apply (and stop overconsuming lol)

I CANT BELIEVE IT TOOK ME ALL THIS TIME TO FINALLY GET IT…  Tips & Techniques I’ve known about the Law of Assumption for almost four years, and now I finally get it. I always thought that when I closed my eyes to imagine something, it was my false self—let’s call her Ella—doing the imagining and experiencing the desire. But that’s not true. Ella only exists in the physical realm; she’s just another object in awareness. The one who’s really imagining is awareness itself—God, consciousness—the only thing that truly exists. Now I understand why imagination is immediate and real. It’s not Ella’s creation because she has no access to awareness. Ella’s role is confined to the 3D world. Her job is to make sense of life through logic, past experiences, and sensory input. So, when I imagine something, Ella can’t “see” it because imagination operates in the realm of awareness, not the physical. This is why thoughts like “Where is it?” or “It’s not working” arise—they’re just Ella panicking because she didn’t witness the creation happen. Ella is fixated on time and the physical world, so she doubts anything beyond her perception. But her panic doesn’t mean anything because she’s not the one imagining. She’s not capable of understanding or influencing what exists in awareness. This realization leaves no excuse not to trust my imagination. Imagination is beyond Ella’s capabilities, and its reality is not dependent on her understanding. This isn’t an invitation to hate or fight Ella—it’s about recognizing her limitations and letting her be. When I notice my mind being logical or thinking doubtful thoughts, I can let them pass because that’s just Ella doing her job. There’s no need to argue with or control her because it’s like bullying a blind person for not being able to see. She simply can’t perceive what’s happening in awareness, and that’s okay. Let her do her thing, knowing it doesn’t matter. The real work is already done in imagination, which is the realm of the infinite.

Someone answered:

Yup, Ella is herself a manifestation of consciousness and there is only consciousness. We think we are Ella, when we are consciousness, perceiving things through Ella's perspective. Good job. And that's exactly why manifestation is instant, the moment awareness becomes aware of something through your imagination, it happens. Because everything is awareness. You already are living that reality from the moment you imagined it. Ella will keep thinking. You need to not react to those thoughts or feelings of Ella, observe them, take care of Ella when she feels down but laugh a little at her naivety. Most people imagine and forget that they're not Ella but consciousness and become aware of something else by giving attention to Ella's limited perspective but guess what? Ella is a well behaved child, she will learn as soon as you discipline her. Her thoughts would slowly get on board too and so will the feelings. So let Ella be, don't react to her thoughts and emotions and become aware of something that's not what you want

People need to read this!!! Thank you so much for sharing!!

[dailydoseoffanfics]

HEHEHEHHHE I'M GLAD TO SERVE :3

(warning: uhhh pretty angsty, i guess) (but i suck at writing angst soo uhh..bare with me.) (also another possible ooc)

Okay so, if you were controlling the killers before they trusted you, then you just gave a good reason as to why they shouldn't trust you. I mean, from their perspective, they gotta go through rounds where they're being chased by killers, so imagine their reaction when they found you're controlling the people that is killing them. I think they gonna start a rebellion against you at this point 💀

HOWEVER, if all of them had a mutual agreement to trust you and they found out? Oh, I feel like all of the survivors are gonna go through a rollercoaster of emotions. They're gonna feel any emotions except anything that's positive. Shock, sadness, angriness, disbelief, you name it. But y'know what they all have in common? All of the survivors will feel betrayed.

(How did the survivors figured it out? Well guess what. When you're controlling the killers, they also have VISIBLE, WHITE STRINGS ON THEM !!!11 OH NOES!!!)

Noob just. automatically goes back into being scared of you. All the trust they had for you vanishes. (Especially if you killed them) And now they're putting more efforts into getting out of your strings. They looked up to you. They thought they could trust. But now, they feel like an idiot for trusting you. Why would you do this? WHY?

Now, for Two Time, it depends. If they found out before the obsession, their view on you becomes more negative, and now they think you're some kind of devil. They gonna think you see all of their teammates merely as toys, including them, which puts a bad taste on Two Time. So, expect to see them heavily glaring at your screen, and on rare occasions, even try to cut a string with their dagger.

But during the obsession?

....Well. They definitely saw it for sure, but they choose to ignore it. You see, when Two Time is obsessing over admiring you, they think you're a pure deity that could do no wrong. They totally didn't witness you killing Chance as Chance drops dead on the floor. So uh, Two Time in their delusional era.

Speaking of Chance, he's a....pretty special case. Because instead of immediately losing trust, he initially smirks. Crunky! You're the big bad killer now? Well, if it's a challenge, then he accepts. Chance likes challenges, and you being a killer excites them more. I mean, makes the experience more thrilling, i guess?

However, Chance is NOT blind. They saw how you controlling one of the killers has affected the survivors, and the survivors AREN'T happy. (Except for Two Time he guesses...) It's not like he doesn't give a shit about how their friends are feeling, so basically, Chance has mixed feelings about you, especially as he's thinking more about you being the reason as to why he's stuck in this time-looping game.

Chance won't try to break out of your strings, but you will notice how Chance has a blank face throughout the rounds....

Elliot on the other hand, completely loses his shit, in a bad way. I'm talking like CRASHING THE FUCK OUT type of way. So ALL this time, he thought he could trust you, that you just had good intentions and meant no harm, that you just wanted to help him and his friends. He trusted you, he TRULY did. But then YOU turn around and control those.....those PEOPLE THAT LOVE TO TARGET AND KILL HIM EVERY. SINGLE. FUCKING. ROUND.

He's saying all of this internally, but trust me when I say that this man is TWEAKING. Like....you can see his eye twitch once in a while and he KNOWS he can't get out of your control, so he just resorts into saying passive-aggressive stuff towards you. He's definitely going to make his hatred towards you LOUD AND CLEAR.

He's mostly pissed off, but another part of him just feels. Crushed. Sad. He genuinely feels so stupid for trusting you. He just..... wants everything to be quiet. And be left alone.

(elliot's reaction summarized):

Shedletsky, Builderman and Guest 1337 are gonna feel the MOST betrayed about this. I mean, at this point, almost ALL of the survivors are gonna be pissed about it, ESPECIALLY THESE 3. Great, absolutely wonderful, they totally asked for this already hellhole game to make their lives worse by having you betray their trust. They're totally jumping up and down from joy.

Even then, they can't get out of your grasp, it's almost as if the world is mocking their lives and purely just sees all 3 of their sufferings as entertainment. It almost feels hopeless. Keyword: almost.

Yeahhh, Shed's gonna rebel by just. Randomly stopping regardless if they're in a chase or not. Oh and he's gonna purposely miss his slash no matter how correct and close the position is (bro's gonna step back). Builderman's the MOST BLUNT. Bro's gonna start dissing you, telling you that you're just like the killers: seeing their fear and deaths merely as entertainment. Guest 1337 won't do much, but he WILL give you disapproving looks and sometimes snears at you.

(I just know Shed will be MORE pissed off if you're playing as 1x1x1x1. Like...dude. C'mon, REALLY? YOU'RE CONTROLLING HIS LITERAL EMBODIMENT OF HATRED??? Ohhh, Shed is SEETHING, meanwhile, 1x1x1x1's pride and ego is secretly rising, and he's got a cocky grin on his face.)

007n7....has nothing to say, initially. It's just.... This is just too much for him. First he has to deal with his son being a killer, and now he has to deal with you? Yeahhhh... bro will be the first person to accept his fate. And when you're playing as him again, 007n7 will avoid eye contact with you as MUCH as possible. He needs someone to talk to :broken_heart:

In conclusion? You better have the option of being a killer disabled. Or have a 700-word essay with REASONABLE and GOOD explanations as to why you've played as a killer.

[sugusearrings]

( ' safe & sound ' )

just close your eyes, the sun is going down you'll be alright no one can hurt you now come morning light you and i'll be safe and sound.

— summary: captain levi ackerman the strongest warrior alive is struggling to adjust after the war. but you (fem!reader) are there to remind him he deserves peace. — genre: fluff but tiny bit of angst. — playing: safe & sound by taylor swift — note(s): so aot just ended and i'm still in denial it's really over. my boy eren did nothing wrong but i understand, 80% is kind of a lot BUT HE WAS A CHILD WAR WEAPON. anyways, post war. SPOLIERS AHEAD JUST A FAIR WARNING OKAY. levi ackerman and reader have a slight age gape ( reader is 25 and levi is in his mid thirties). mentions of brief sex. mentions of scars and death. maybe some spelling errors i missed but i tried ~ levi may be grumpy and mean but he's a total softie to the reader. — word count: 2k

He inhaled sharply as his upper body sat up from his sleep. He could feel the cold sweat formed on his the side of his head rolling down. His chest rose up and down with each inhale he took. He ran his hand over his face. He glanced down at his hands. His two missing fingers always reminded him what happened almost five years ago now. The rumbling ending. Everyone is trying to rebuild a normal life. He never really knew what a normal life was. His life was all about fighting and survival and now it was over. What was Levi made for now?

He quickly reached over for his cane leaning against the nightstand.

Levi was determined not to be stuck to that damn chair, he did whatever exercise he could without putting too much on his body. There were some days he had to be wheeled around. But using the cane on the daily was happening often. He didn’t want to be helpless or dependent on anyone. He was never like that so why start now?

He made his way out of the bedroom and walked into the small hallway that normally took two minutes to pass but it felt entirely. He was on alert, adrenaline pumping through his veins already. How could he protect now? He felt so useless. Once the greatest warrior to this. At first it was hard accepting this new reality of his. All he wanted to do was sink more into the dark and isolate himself.

If he was gone, would anyone notice? Would anyone care? Those he loved and cared for were long gone leaving him alone. He never knew loneliness would become his true enemy.

He held his breath accepting his fate as he walked into the kitchen. His dull gray eye widen seeing you standing there already pouring some tea in one of his favorite cups. He nearly dropped his cane.

“Name…”

“Captain Levi?” You looked up at him a bit startled he was awake. He let out a heavy exhale.

“After all this time, you still callin’ me that?” He rolled his eye then shook his head. “Give me a break.” You giggled quietly with a light blush appearing on your cheeks.

“I’m sorry, it’s just an old habit I guess.”

“What are you doing up?” He asked you completely ignoring what you said.

“I figured you would want some tea when you would wake up.” You replied walking over to grab another cup from the cabinet. Levi could feel his ears beginning to burn. He cleared his throat.

“You…know?” You turned around to see the flustered older man. You tilted your head slightly to the side and was baffled. He thought he could hide his nightmares from you. His nightmares of the past.

“Of course I do.”

Your warm smile still made his heart throb the same way it did when you two met.

He found you the most annoying thing ever. You were too optimistic for his liking and you were very emotional. You were immature and very impulsive. But he adored that about you. You weren’t scared to stand up for what you believe in, even against him. When he was your captain and you were just a cadet on his squad. You two saw things from different perspectives but he respected that. He wasn’t sure if he ever told you he did.

“I’m sorry I woke you.” He made his way over to the nearest chair at the table. He pulled it out so he could sit. You took the cup full of tea and walked over to place it in front of him.

“It’s okay, Levi. Your nightmares don’t always wake me,” you placed your hand over his, “I have my own too, y’know?” You gave him a gentle squeeze.

The guilt sunk deep in Levi’s chest. How could he not think about you having your own trauma for what you both went through. Losing people you love, being injured and almost close to death several times. You had many scars to prove it. Especially the one on your neck reaching to the top of your chest. It was easier to hide but doesn’t mean it wasn’t a constant reminder when you would change outfits, shower, even during intimate times.

“I’m a horrible husband aren’t I, name?” He sighed deeply, reaching to grab his cup the same way he always has. You smiled remembering the time you made fun of the way he held his glass to your other comrades. It was all laughter until Levi was behind you the whole time. When you turned around looking white as a ghost seeing Levi glaring down at you. You screamed loudly then he made you clean his office and room from top to bottom.

“A little bit.” You teased him playfully. You grinned when your husband glared at you. “I’m kidding, Levi. How are you a bad husband?”

“My wife has fucking nightmares next to me and here I am sleeping.” He snapped. You bit your bottom lip and lowered your eyes. “But I even breathe a certain way, she knows if there’s something wrong with me.” He went on becoming more aggravated with himself.

“You’re being hard on yourself again.”

“You’re not denying it.” He countered. You sighed deeply.

“Levi…I have nightmares, yes. But you help me just by being there next to me.” You gave him another squeeze. Before he could say some smart ass remark you cut him off. “You remind me of what’s happening now. I can’t forget the past...I can never forget. But waking up next you eases it and makes it better to deal with.” Levi remained silent.

He couldn’t believe someone like you could ever love someone like him. To this day he would be in disbelief. You were so warm and he was so cold. But here you are sharing a life with him.

“You make it sound so easy.” He mumbled lowly.

“I know when you have nightmares when you hold onto me tight.” You admitted. His eye widened looking over at you. You smiled shyly looking away. You were trying to hide the dark blush on your cheeks but he would always see it. You couldn’t hide it from him.

He could remember the first time he made you blush. It was the first time he saw you with your hair down. When he complemented you ( in his own way that didn’t sound too mean ), you blushed. His heart fluttered how perfect you looked with your cheeks flushed.

“You woke up because I wasn’t in bed this time…” You spoke snapping him out of his own thoughts.

“I thought in a marriage there was no such thing as secrets.” He joked dryly.

You laughed covering your mouth with your hand. He noticed some faint scars on your hand. He remembered that scar. He remembers all the scars on every inch of your body. He would kiss them gently some nights making your breathing hitch. He would kiss the scar on your neck the most. He felt that needed the most attention. The day he almost lost you for good.

You were fighting alongside him against Zeke for the first time.

That’s when Levi realizes his feelings for you.

He stood by your side whenever he can, waiting for you to recover. He would even read out loud to you. When you woke up a few days later, you asked him to re-read the sentence he just read because you couldn’t hear him.

What nearly broke him when he thought you drank the wine with the spinal fluid.

Thankfully you didn’t but he confessed his feelings for you the same night. Yes, it was inappropriate for a caption to be with his cadet but he didn’t care about his title or yours in that moment. Levi just needed you to know in case something happened. He was ready to hear your rejection but when you confessed your own feelings for him, he was relieved.

That’s when Zeke did the explosion, Levi had enough time to push you off the wagon leaving him to suffer the injuries alone. He doesn’t regret it. He’ll do it all over again.

“Is this how you pictured how things would be after?” You asked him gently. Levi closed his eyes for a brief moment before opening them. His dull gray eyes staring into yours.

“Yes and no.”

“That’s not a fair answer, Captain Levi.”

“Name.”

“Sorry.” You held your hands up in defense. He sighed softly.

“Yes, I pictured this after the rumbling. Marrying you, having a normal life with you. Just being with you in peace. What I didn’t expect was to be like this.” He glanced down at his hand again that bandaged up from the fingers he lost from that explosion. “I wasn’t much of a looker then but god look at me now.” He let out a sad chuckle. You frowned, feeling your heart aching. Was he serious right now? You thought Levi was the most handsome man you ever met. You were drawn to his dark gray hues. During the day they would glisten.

“Levi, don’t think that. You’re still handsome to me and always will be.”

“Don’t feed me that shit, name.” Levi scoffed. His stubbornness was still the same as before. You sighed and rested your chin on your hand letting him ramble on his negativity. “Probably see me as a pity case.”

“If that’s so, why do we still make love four times a week?” You questioned. When you looked over to your husband who was silent but red in the face. You felt your lips curl up into a smirk. “Cat got your tongue, captain Levi? Oh I’m sorry, I forgot to mention how we fuck multiple times. All night if I don’t tap out.” You purred in a tone you knew was his weakness. Levi shifted a bit in his seat then brought his left hand to clear his throat.

“Shut it you brat.”

You simply smiled at your victory.

“I love you, Levi. I don’t know why you can’t accept that.”

“You deserve better.”

“So do you.” You replied back. Levi glared at you once again.

“How can you say that shit?”

“Because you’re saying it so why not?” You shrugged then got up to pour yourself that tea you swore it was cold by now. Levi’s eye scanned down to your body how it hid underneath his white shirt. When you would lift to reach something it exposed some of your bare flesh underneath. He held his breath for a moment.

“I just…hope this is what you want.” His voice spoke. You didn’t turn around. Your eyes glanced down at your cup you were holding. Your ring finger was empty but the silver band stood on your nightstand with your glass of water that was empty now. Levi would always bring you a glass of water before bed.

“I want to spend my life with you, Levi. We’re at peace now. You’re at peace. You deserved this. You risked your life so many times. Everyday it’s a struggle for you to live with what happened. But we can do it together, just trust me?”

You turned with glossy eyes staring back over to him. He used his strength to stand up on his own for a moment. Then he made his way over to you. Once he was close enough, he placed his hand on your cheek just studying your face.

“I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings…I’m just scared to lose you.” He confessed not trying to make eye contact with you. You placed your hand on his cheek and stroked it with your thumb. You stroked over the scars left behind by the stitches on his face you did for him. “I don’t know what I would do if I ever lost you.”

“I survived to live a life with you, Levi.”

You whispered then leaned forward to place your lips against his. His arm wrapped around your waist to bring you closer to his body. His lips moved against yours passionately. He pushed his body against yours causing your lower back to press against the counter. You let out a shaky breath when he broke the kiss then started to kiss along your neck. His fingers trailed down to the buttons on your shirt. Just when you were going to close your eyes and enjoy his lips sucking on your skin you were interrupted.

“Mommy? Daddy?”

You both pulled away at the same time to see a groggy toddler with messy dark hair all over the place. He hugged his stuffed bear tightly with his other arm.

“Hi baby.” You greeted him softly making. Levi straighten your shirt making sure the buttons were still in tact.

“What are you doing up, hm?” Levi asked him. The toddler frowned with his gray eyes half open.

“I wanna sleep with you and mama.” He made grabby hands towards him. He shook his head.

“Sorry kid, you have to go sleep in your bed like a big boy.” Your son sniffed and his big gray eyes began to water. Of course you were a sucker but you didn’t expect for Levi to be the one who caved in. “Tsk. Fine. Just for tonight.” Levi grabbed his cane and began to walk back into your bedroom. The little boy’s eyes beamed, making you giggle quietly. You brought the two cups to the sink thinking you were in the clear.

“Clean those damn cups.” Levi’s voice echoed from the bedroom.

You sucked your teeth with an eye roll.

“I’ll clean them in the morning.” You entered the bedroom seeing Levi already in bed. He leaned over to bring his son into bed. He snuggled up against his father, sighing happily feeling his warmth. You went over to your side on the bed to lay next to your son.

Levi always spoke about not wanting children. You didn’t have a clear answer if you wanted them or not. Some days you did but bringing them in a world like this wasn’t fair either. But finding out you were pregnant on your wedding day was a surprise. It meant you were pregnant during the fight that stopped the rumbling.

It was a miracle the child growing inside of you survived. But he’s a fighter like his father.

Asher Levi Ackerman.

A fortunate blessing for you both.

You leaned against the headboard stroking Asher’s hair as his eyes began to close.

“He looks just like you.” You whispered to Levi as you moved some of Asher’s dark hair out of his face. He smiled a bit.

“You think so?”

“Everyone says it. He looks nothing like me.”

“But he acts like you. A brat.”

You reached over to shove him playfully. It made him chuckle.

“Sleep, name. We have a long day at the shop tomorrow.”

“Fuck me.” You mumbled under your breath with a groan.

“Maybe tomorrow.”

Levi laid down and closed his eyes hearing you giggle quietly before drifting back to sleep. You laid down staring at your son and husband cuddling with one another. You could tell Levi’s nightmare was over for the night. You soon drifted into a deep slumber.

And yes, you did forget to wash the teacups in the sink

But Levi washed them before opening the tea shop for the day but he did remember to scold you about it.

[thewertsearch]

UU: hello there, darling. ~3u GT: Ahoy madame! UU: i dont relish troUbling yoU with more arm twisting. UU: im sUre for all ive done so far yoUve had a jolly good workoUt already :u UU: bUt yoU will be ready to deliver the package today, yes?

So Umbra was the arm-twister.

She's the reason that Jack ascended, way back in Act 4. I have to assume she's aware of the ramifications of what she's done, which means she wanted Perfect Jack to happen - or at the very least, she allowed it to happen, as a side-effect of her true goal.

GT: Theres the matter of the rabbits armaments. GT: I dont imagine hell do a lot of friggin good in helping grandfather crocker from kicking the old bucket without them. GT: Did you not say youd supply these? UU: i did indeed say so! UU: and have already done. […] UU: in yoUr fUtUre. UU: i relayed the information enabling yoU to create the powerfUl weaponry yoUrself.

Curiouser and curiouser.

Those weapons have all been seen before, and we already know the gun was supplied by Eridan, in a conversation with pre-Scratch Jade. If Umbra has managed to get her hands on its code, she must have had some contact with the Jade we know.

...well, I guess she doesn't necessarily have to talk to Jade. She could just have captcharoided a ghost image of the gun, if she knew where to look.

GT: So much to do before shuttling this goddamn thing into the past. […] GT: That is what im doing right? Giving it to my grandma when she was a kid growing up on the same island i did? UU: that is somewhat close to the trUth, and i can see how yoU woUld draw that conclUsion. UU: bUt theres more to it yoU dont Understand yet! yoU will sort it all oUt in time. […] UU: it woUldnt hUrt yoU mUch to know the trUth, i imagine. UU: its jUst the trUth is a wee bit complicated.

Explaining the Scratch to Jake would be a pretty tall order - but at the same time, it seems like Umbra is hiding a lot of information from the Players she's talking to. She clearly knows more than they do, so why won't she lay her cards on the table?

UU: imagine two Universes, A and B. UU: now imagine there are two instances of each Universe, A1 and A2 and B1 and B2. UU: the first instance of each is like a test rUn, that does not qUite sUcceed. UU: the second instance thoUgh will meet all of its pUrposes!

I don't know if I'd call A2 a 'success', to be honest. I'm pretty sure that's Karkat's session, and Karkat's session was a bit of a disaster.

I suppose it depends on whose perspective we're talking about. Maybe, from UU's perspective, the troll session did meet all of its 'purposes' - it's just that its purposes didn't include creating a healthy universe.

[oceanwithouthermoon]

okok let me finally do my analysis on kusuke and makoto parallels like ive talked about a thousand times (obvious warning that im gonna talk about incest, and also that im gonna be talking about a gag manga in a serious light so if that upsets you just go away ✌️)... yippee, perverted older brothers with unhealthy dynamics with their powerful younger siblings analysis!!

the most obvious parallel is in their interactions with the others sibling. they literally have the same exact meeting, they both go from being fake nice to "my sibling is special and youre not worthy of them"

not included in pictures but also note that kusuo got rid of makoto by calling on kokomi and kokomi got rid of kusuke by calling on her fans

"the second hes distracted, LETS GO"

"we're the only ones who can match up to each other"

kusukes idea of kusuo being inhuman also influences the way this is treated i think- he tells kokomi that marrying a beautiful man will suit her best and that kusuo is above that kind of thing (aka actual romantic and aesthetic attraction), and it seems that being the only ones who can measure up to each other is probably the closest, in his eyes, that kusuo can get to love (confirmed in my opinion by the marriage/engagement symbolism a few pictures down⬇️). thats why he thinks theyre the only ones worthy of each other even if he doesnt see kusuo in the exact same way as makoto sees kokomi. if that makes any sense :p these are obviously already parallel on surface level, but id say theyre even more similar if you look deeply into it

"i know everything youre thinking" and "everyone else looks like monkeys to me"

associating their sibling with heaven/god

a certain fixation on their sibling's body... top two are specifically them trying to see their sibling naked without consent

? not sure how to describe this. implications of engagement/marriage? this use of an explicitly romantic symbol actually confuses me in kusukes case but thats not really relevant here...

theyre the reason their sibling cant relax or be themself even at home... also note that kusuo specifically says that kusuos masochism (which i guess in some contexts masochism can be non-sexual but in this situation, since kusuke is canonically a pervert and there are several implications and allusions to sexual pleasure, it obviously means he gets SEXUAL pleasure from pain/humiliation) is the main reason he doesnt like him. likewise, kokomi is bothered by makotos overprotective and overbearing nature, though unfortunately she doesnt seem to be aware of his sister complex and thinks hes just being an annoying big brother.

not necessarily something that can be captured in a picture but theres also the fact that they both have pretty perfect lives but are still obsessed with their sibling and only their sibling, its all they really care about and their entire lives depend on them.

makoto is extremely attractive, charming when hes trying to be, and is a famous actor... he clearly gets girls. but he doesnt want any of them because hes stuck in his obsession with kokomi, shes the only girl he wants and its ruined his perception of other girls. he believes hes the only one that can be right for kokomi and touch her, and that likewise kokomi is the only girl he can be with. her presence dictates his life, he skips work just to follow her around and prevent her from getting involved with other guys. we only see maybe a few sentences from him where he isnt talking about kokomi, even when hes on tv.

kusuke is an attractive and charming genius, easily pulls girls, cambridge graduate, and is the favorite child in his family. but none of that matters, it only sets him apart from other humans and gives him a skewed perspective of anyone who isnt kusuo. he believes kusuo is the only person he can get that sadomasochistic pleasure from, and kusuo is the reason he developed it in the first place and he specifically seeks him out and coerces him into it. he really only cares about his family, theyre the only people in the world that are worth anything in his eyes, and his only interactions with anyone else have been using them as tools to get to kusuo. his life goal is (or was, before the end of cat tank arc) defeating kusuo. he has cameras in his familys house that hes presumably constantly watching, implied by him being ALREADY watching before his parents even called him about kusuos limiter.

[omegastation]

Thoughts after doing Garrus ME1 Normandy transcript:

Garrus doesn’t really argue with Shepard. It’s always “I suppose you’re right”, “Maybe”, etc. There’s one time when he even cuts short the conversation to avoid further conflict: GARRUS: I wasn't trying to– I understand, Commander. And the only time he really insists is because he wants them to kill Saren instead of keeping him alive but the way he does it is not directly confronting - he just asks questions. He doesn't say "I don't agree with you". And when Shepard explains, he immediately answers: "Yeah. I see your point."

I think he led Shepard into asking more and more questions about Dr Saleon so he could give Shepard his coordinates. My guess is he was waiting for the right time and Shepard being curious about what he experienced before was the perfect opportunity.

This part of their dialogue carries so much: GARRUS: My father’s a C-Sec man to the bone. “Do things right, or don’t do them at all,” he says. He thinks I’m being too rash. Too impatient. He’s worried I’ll become just like Saren. He actually talked me out of becoming a Spectre when I was younger. For the same reasons.  I think Garrus’ father was trying to protect him and rein him in, but by doing so, he prevented him from seeing complex situations and learning from them. Because this way of thinking doesn’t allow for real growth and mistakes. We're often told that we learn by doing things and it's true but first, we have to make mistakes and see where they come from. We also might not give our 100%, sometimes it's a 10% that leads to a 100% next time. And trying still means something. IDK, Garrus' father has a very restricting way of seeing things and to me, it’s how you end up with ME1 Garrus - who wants to be above the law and who has so much trouble seeing situations in a more complex way than “I have to let hostages die to catch the bad guy”. But when confronted with a more nuanced perspective - with a Shepard that challenges his point of view - Garrus learns and grows from it. And that's what he needs at this point in ME1. I'll say it's even necessary.

And this exchange right there: SHEPARD: For the most part, the rules are there for a reason.  GARRUS: Maybe. But sometimes it feels like the rules are only there to stop me from doing my work.  What exactly is Garrus’ work? Honestly, what does he mean by that?  I think his work is ME2’s Archangel and it’s quite scary. 

And finally, Shepard will pick up on changes in Garrus depending on how he starts the conversation.  Like here: GARRUS: Commander. I… What can I do for you? And your option is to reply: SHEPARD: Something bothering you? It’s in the fourth conversation and I love it.

[cauqhtz]

━━ WALK WITH ME x KATAKURI +18

SNACK TIME

disclaimer: food play? Nt rlly, smut, penetrative, nsfw content, pnv, etc…

a/n: minors dni. I guess this is me participating in kinktober? LOL maybe just twice. I have 2 nsfw drafts… though the other one is more plot than smut. Be kind…still trying to shake off my writers block.

Hear me out.... He's huge and you're... not. Talk about size kink. Lets talk about his daily snack times. The one time throughout the day where he can lie down on his back, remove his scarf and inhale donuts... or.. walk with me.

Lets say he has a wife who joins him on these snack times of his. Wearing nothing but donuts and STAY WITH ME OKAY. His donuts are HUGE because of his size. so they fit perfectly against your body.

Can you imagine Katakuri watching you climb off his snack cart... wearing only donuts? Or maybe he picks you up from the cart whichever suits your fancy.

Or maybe you’re a chef in toto land (on-top of being his wife) so maybe you not only prepare his donuts but serve it to him…in nothing but a apron, sat very prettily on his cart…one of his donuts in your hand and you hold it out to him once he finishes making his little get-away.

The donuts giving Katakuri the perfect opportunity to devour you. Mmm... imagine your body littered with bite marks, hickeys, and hand prints.

We've all seen his tongue... Imagine him eating you till he's completely satisfied or until your completely under his control. Which ever came first, both of your brains too scrambled to know.

Maybe you’ve had a day repairing some dessert based buildings that big mom destroyed in one of her hunger pains…So you’ve been looking forward to your husbands snack time so much so that your trembling with desperation and need, not that he didn’t notice. Katakuri taking advantage of his observation haki saved your present breath by looking into the future to catch himself up to speed. So ever the vigilant husband, lies down without much fuss with his hands held out, just for you, his wife who’ll need the support.

“Well, come on then. You’ve waited long enough so take what you’ve been waiting for.” And so you do, take what you’ve been waiting for, which is a seat on your husbands pretty little face. Your hands holding his, sighing as your husbands tongue, strong, wet, long, and warm, went to work plunging deep, licking as every little inch within you. “Haah,” you moan loudly as his lips made out with your lower lips. “I do adore that look in your eyes,” You moan, back arching as you came, biting your lip at the sound of Katakuri swallowing your slick.

FOLLOW ME. Nearly done. Can we talk about his hands? I just know he's amazing at massaging, you get me? Huge and INSANELY warm hands caressing every inch of your bruised and kissed skin… He’d wait till you’re completely relaxed to take his time sliding in…Pressing your head down and pushing your legs farther apart BEFORE you start to squirm. “I understand your discomfort beloved but if you jerk...You’ll hurt yourself.” Not to mention he had to have complete and utter control of you.

Imagine him bending, twisting and stretching you into any position he could think of. I mean the skys the limit with him. You on your back, hips raised, legs in a deep V shape... Mmm now thats a dangerous position. The way he'd be able to rip the soul from your body?

What about downward doggy? The way he'd trail his fingers down your spine? your body obeying the silent command and arching beautifully. Your arms stretched straight infront of you, hands being held or pinned by his... Just depends on your perspective.

The way it would feel like the air being vaccumed from your very lungs? Besides that. I do have some thoughts about how he’d go about incorporating his haki into his…snack time, but we’ll circle back to that.

…DID I LOSE YOU?

— all rights reserved © CAUQHTZ2020-? all fanfics belong to me; do not copy, translate, or recommend any of the works seen here on TikTok.

[olderthannetfic]

So apparently Wattpad has a little questionaire thing you can fill out for your story's metadata.

It starts out pretty reasonable, but quickly gets insane. I'll screenshot the whole thing so you guys don't have to create an account and a dummy work to see it.

The options under the "goal type" dropdown change depending on if you've selected "Physical:

or Emotional:

I guess it works for generic romance? But even then those little sliders are going to be difficult to work out for the more interesting OR the more cardboard protagonists. For the likeable/unlikeable slider, I'm not sure if they mean that from a reader's perspective (which is subjective) or within the narrative (which could well change over the course of the story).

Mind & Logic vs Heart & Emotion activates a pet peeve of mine about how you can't use one without the other, but I can't opt out of that slider, I just have to leave it in the middle.

And of course, all this is assuming that the main point of the story is a protagonist's personality and actions, and not a setting or a relationship. So it doesn't even work for generic shippy romance where the draw is dynamic between two characters or even the personalities of both.

And very little of this is at all applicable to the kinds of horror stuff I tend to write. So if it doesn't work for romance or for horror, what does it work for? Low conflict coming of age stories, I guess? But I don't think the "story goal" things would be very easy to answer for those. And it's very difficult to map any of this this to short story format where things don't progress or change much but where the reader simply sees an interesting moment (PWP is one example there, half of Lovecraft's output is another).

I suspect this form just exists to train algorithms (or LLMs, brrr), but since the ticky boxes can't actually represent a story, it can't actually be used to train an algorithm to consider two stories similar or dissimilar.

(Also this might be old news, this is the first time I'm seeing the form, but I poke at Watpadd like once every two years or something)

--

Egad!

[saphronethaleph]

Filing a P-90

“Young man, a few moments of your time?”

CT-0102 looked up, confused.

“...how so?” the trooper asked. “You’re, uh, if you want to talk, you can just talk. If you have orders, go ahead and give them. Ma’am.”

“I’d rather not force you to discuss something,” the elderly woman said, by way of explanation. “I was wondering if you had a perspective on… weapons.”

“Weapons,” 102 repeated. “I guess… I’ve been trained with them? Using weapons is my job, I mean? Does that count as an opinion?”

“It might,” the old woman said. “But I meant more the philosophy of why a weapon exists.”

She shrugged, one hand resting for a moment on a long box by her side. “And, in particular, whether a weapon’s design tells us something about what it’s meant for.”

“This is getting dangerously philosophical, ma’am,” 102 admitted. “It’s above my pay grade.”

“It’s not above mine, I think,” the woman told him. “If you don’t want to talk, say so. I give you that permission, if you need it. But what I mean is that, for example… a lightsaber is a Jedi’s weapon, and that means that it’s a weapon of defence and of decisive attack. A lightsaber in trained hands is able to both protect others and to bring a quick end to any fight, and the respect it earns from those who see it can prevent a fight in the first place… a blaster, meanwhile, well, it depends on the blaster, doesn’t it?”

“I suppose that’s true, ma’am,” 102 admitted, glancing up for a moment as the turbulence around the ship increased – for a moment, at least.

There wasn’t anything he could do about it, so he just shrugged.

“A small pistol is intended to be concealed,” the woman went on. “It’s a weapon of self defence, but it’s also a weapon for committing an unexpected crime. While a larger, more powerful pistol, that’s a weapon of intimidation. It’s bulky enough to be difficult to conceal, and it’s less accurate than a long weapon, so it’s for both scare tactics and bringing a battle to a quick end. So does that mean it’s like a lightsaber?”

102 considered that.

“Our training covered how to handle most weapons, but it didn’t really address the cultural side of things,” he admitted. “We mostly focused on weapons for once a fight is inevitable.”

“Quite,” the woman agreed – 102 hadn’t actually got her name at any point. “The long rifle, which is designed for military efficiency on a battlefield. Harder to conceal in civilian life, almost impossible in fact, but it’s more effective than most weapons on a battlefield… at least, until you start dealing with either larger targets that they simply can’t damage, or more confined spaces where you want a shorter weapon. They share the attribute of being practical.”

She looked at his eyes, through the helmet. “Isn’t that interesting?”

“I guess,” 102 said, not really sure how to react. “Why do you say that?”

The woman was silent for several seconds, and as she was CT-0102 heard over the battalion push that they were getting close to their deployment point.

“If you don’t mind, I’d prefer this gunship to take up an overwatch position,” the woman said. “I do apologize, I should have mentioned it sooner.”

She pulled the box over to her, and undid the latches, then paused before opening it.

“What about this description of a weapon?” she asked. “A weapon that is designed for killing?”

102 blinked.

“Aren’t… most weapons designed for killing?” he asked. “That’s why they’re weapons.”

“Not at all,” the woman replied. “As we’ve just discussed. Your rifle is designed for practical battlefield use. Weight, length, shot count, rate of fire, all these considerations went into making it. Many other weapons are shaped by different design constraints entirely – a hold-out pistol, or a large heavy blaster. A lightsaber. I’m talking about a weapon that isn’t designed for a fight at all. That isn’t designed to be seen. That’s meant to be used as sparingly as possible, because you’re only meant to use it in the very direst need.”

She pushed open the box, and revealed a kind of long weapon, perhaps a blaster and perhaps not. It looked archaic, with some of the furniture made of actual wood and the rest out of something 102 couldn’t even identify, and there were odd protuberances and glowing blue segments on it.

“For such a weapon, all other considerations would be secondary to lethality,” the woman said. “If they were involved at all. It’s not intended to be involved in a battle, where you try to defeat the enemy; it’s not intended for a warning shot. The only purpose is to kill, and it is only to be used when there is no better choice.”

She knelt down on the floor of their gunship, and a few seconds later the Commander called out the launch order. Their assault ship was passing over the target zone, and all the gunships deployed.

Below, 102 could see the desert, and the darting red shapes of Aethersprite starfighters giving them cover against Geonosian fighter craft. More gunships were deploying, blasts going left and right, and 102 grabbed onto the handles overhead with a free hand for stability.

The woman didn’t seem to notice.

Instead, she took something from her belt, and slotted it into the weapon. It lit up, and she tapped a few controls before snugging the stock of the weapon into her shoulder.

“It’s a shame, you know,” she said, almost conversationally. “He was a great friend of mine, once. I thought he still was, until recently.”

“Who was?” 102 asked.

“Dooku,” the woman answered, her voice slightly distracted. “Emotion, yet peace… my old friend, I do not do this for revenge, but to prevent a greater wrong.”

The strange weapon spat out a bolt of brilliant sky-blue light, one that was like a solid bar connecting their gunship to the ground, and the woman hesitated for a moment… then let out a sigh.

“May you find the peace in death that so failed you in life,” she said, in tones of quiet prayer.

“Sorry, but – did you just…” 102 asked.

“What the kriff was that?” the gunship pilot asked, over the comm connection.

“Well, you can view it in two ways,” the Jedi Master said, ejecting her lightsaber from the rifle and examining it. “No, three, I think. Firstly, that my lightsaber and I were united in the need for that to be done. Secondly, that Count Dooku was too great a threat to peace in the galaxy to live. And third…”

Jocasta Nu placed the rifle back in its box.

“Nobody messes with the Jedi Archives,” she concluded.

[elliespassagerprincess]

Hello can you write a fic based off of ‘1 step forward and 3 steps back’ by Olivia Rodrigo ? thank you! <3

One Step Forward, Three Steps Back: ellie williams x reader

hi anon! i hope you like it:) I tried something new adding ellies pov.. i hope you dont mind:)

This story is based off the song one step forward, three steps back by olivia rodrigo. If you can, please listen to the song as you're reading:)

Pairing: ellie williams x fem!reader

requests are open, send me your thoughts:)

Warnings: Emotional manipulation, toxic patterns, heartbreak, strong language, emotional dependency, insecurity

Summary: In which your relationship always put you 3 steps back

Masterlist

"You got me fucked up in the head, boy."

You wish you could blame it on the trauma.

On the broken world. On the things she’s seen. The things you’ve seen.

But deep down, you know it’s more than that.

It’s her.

And it’s you.

And it’s this thing you keep calling love just to justify how much it hurts.

You’re sitting on her porch again, arms wrapped around your knees, watching as the sun dips behind the mountains. Her guitar is silent inside. So is she.

You said something wrong today.

You don’t know what, exactly—but her face changed. Her mouth pressed into that tight, unreadable line. She stopped laughing, handed you your coat, and mumbled something about needing to be alone. That was hours ago.

And you’re still here. Because she never told you to leave.

But she didn’t ask you to stay either.

Ellie’s hot and cold. Gentle and cruel. Soft one day, distant the next.

She kisses you like you’re the only thing anchoring her to the earth. Then pushes you away like she can’t stand to be touched.

You never know which version you’re going to get.

It’s always a guessing game.

A test you didn’t sign up for.

A trap she doesn’t even know she’s laying.

And every time you think you’re getting somewhere—one step forward—

She pulls away. Shuts down. Disappears.

Three steps back. Every. Time.

You remember the first time she let her walls down.

It was raining, the kind of cold that seeped through your bones. She had a nightmare and showed up at your door looking half-dead. You held her until she stopped shaking. She cried into your neck. Whispered “Don’t leave.” And you didn’t.

She kissed you like she meant it.

You thought it meant something.

Maybe it did.

Maybe it didn’t.

She never said.

"Do you love me, want me, hate me? Boy, I don’t understand."

Sometimes she calls you “baby.” Soft. Real.

Sometimes she calls you “dude,” or doesn’t say anything at all, just grunts and walks past you like you’re nothing.

It fucks you up.

You lay awake wondering what you did.

You second-guess everything you said, every look, every breath.

You practice conversations in your head, afraid that the wrong word will make her disappear again.

You used to be confident.

You used to be whole.

Now, you flinch when she raises her voice. You smile too quickly when she’s calm. You praise her for the bare minimum just because it means she isn’t angry.

You’re in love with someone who’s only ever half-there.

But god, when she’s there—

She’s everything.

ELLIE'S POV (ellie is refered to as you because its her pov! pls don't get confused. i tried writing it from her perspective lol)

“And maybe in some masochistic way, I kind of find it all exciting...”

You don’t mean to hurt her.

You really don’t.

But something in you breaks every time they get too close. Every time they see too much. Every time they look at you with those eyes full of hope and softness and trust.

You don’t deserve that.

You never did.

You love her. You know you do. But love feels like a leash—tight and terrifying. It means responsibility. It means hurting them, eventually. And you’ve already hurt too many people.

You don’t want to be that person again.

So you push. You pull.

You leave the room when things get too quiet. You snap at them when they ask what’s wrong. You disappear, come back, kiss them like they’re the air you breathe, and then say something that makes them question if any of it was real.

You hate yourself for it. But you don’t stop.

Because part of you—dark and broken and mean—likes the chaos.

At least you know how to survive in chaos. You don’t know how to survive in love.

YOUR POV

“Maybe I’m just not as interesting as the girls you had before.”

You hear her mention Dina in her sleep.

Just once.

A murmur. A sigh.

A name you’ve never asked about but always felt lingering.

You pretend you didn’t hear.

But the silence after that is louder than anything she’s ever said.

You try to leave. You pack your bag. You don’t say goodbye. You make it to the gate.

And she’s there.

Looking at you like she’s drowning. Like you’re the last thing keeping her above the surface.

“I’m sorry,” she says. “I just... I don’t know how to do this.”

You hate how fast you crumble.

You kiss her again. You stay again.

And it’s good. For a while.

Until the next wrong word. The next cold shoulder.

The next time you’re sitting on her porch wondering what the fuck you did wrong.

Because with Ellie Williams, it’s always one step forward... three steps back.

And you never know which one is coming next.

[blank-house]

Hello!! Hope you’re doing well!! I noticed something that’s maybe funny that had me genuinely confused about your point system.

So, I’ve replayed keyframes a few times now, and I have a general idea of how each event will play out. I replayed it again recently and the first event I did was the study event where you can either go with Percy and Elio or Jamie, Deja, and Cameron. So, I talked to Jamie about his book, went to the coop with Percy and Elio, stayed behind to draw on the chalkboard with Percy, and succeeded the QTE with Elio.

And the funny thing is that after the event, I noticed that I had somehow gained enough points with all of the guys to get a phone call with any of them - it just depends on the randomizer.

And that’s where the confusion comes in because what do you mean they all like my MC enough to call them?! Percy is understandable, I guess, since I went to the coop like he wanted and stayed behind with him. But I talked to Jamie ONCE and that was enough to get a phone call?! And Elio?!? All I said to Elio was, “Hey, do you have anything else to give the coop?” and that was all he needed?!? I know that Elio is easy to befriend but that just seems like he needs to raise his standards!! /j

I am so confused. I am bewildered. Befuddled, even. How exactly does your point system work? This has only happened with one specific MC I play as and I need to know what I’m doing right with them since my other MCs struggle to make friends.

Anyways, this isn’t a complaint, I just thought it was funny and needed to air out my thoughts. I’m not expecting a reply since this wasn’t even a question. Your point system makes absolutely no sense to me but even that is really fun. You all made a great game and I’m excited to see what you come up with next!!

I assign points arbitrarily, purposefully and/or as fairly as possible! If it makes sense to me for the guys to like the MC for a choice, or a moment, or even a perspective then you get a point.

That way— it’s entirely possible to get a Jamie phone call even though he’s so difficult if you do everything “right” from the moment you met him :3

But lol at least you’re having fun with the mechanic.

[shmowder]

Their concept of immortality is built upon the belief that you are not you, but your memories. Every person is not their body, is not their mind, is not even their DNA.

What you are, is a collection of memories, of life experiences, of ideas, beliefs, and observations.

You are, especially, other people's memories of you. That's the stuff your soul is made out of.

You know the saying, even if someone dies, at least they'll always live on in your memories. The Kains took that literally

Imagine with me that we took all of these things about you, and suspended them in air.

In modern terms: copied them on a hard disk and stored them for safe keeping. Then when you eventually drop dead, we simply take that hard disk and slot it into an appropriate device—a biological human body. Just like a virus, you'll begin taking over that person and overwriting their being.

"The Focus" is the storage place. The hard disk itself. It's called that because you *focus* memories inside of it. The Polyhedron and Crucible are just oversized SD cards.

But can any random human body do?

You Focus on your own memories of who you are, your own experiences, and they etch themselves into the wall. Likewise, other people can focus on their memories of you to help shape the stored version of you better. Since we're all different people depending on who's perceiving us, we need many perspectives; you're a different you with your mother than you are with your dog, etc.

And just like Yulia said, the Focus is not a physical place you can go to, at least the inside of it. It's just math, at its core, through and through. Much like a hard disk is just code, mere numbers and commands. You can save enough books in it to fill a building, but you could never reach in there physically and pull a book, nor replace a mass of books with an equal mass of a human. Which is why no one could enter Simon's Focus without Simon's explicit invitation.

No. It heavily depends on the type of memories you stored, and the way in which you stored them. Much like your phone is unable to read a floppy disk.

Georgiy Kain describes a soul not as a phantom manifestation of the person, but more akin to music. Each soul is a melody. Some are a piano solo, other's a whole orchestra. The more complex and deceivingly subtle the melody is—the more life experiences and memories—the harder it will be to replicate and play.

Because they have no feasible way to access the music sheets of the melody that is your soul, they can only hope to reverse engineer it through repeated listening, studies, and educated guesses.

Orchestras require various specific musical instruments to work. To replicate a person's soul—which we have established is their memories—successfully, you'll need an appropriate instrument of a physical body.

So no, not just any human body would do. Much like a Clair de Lune is horrendous on a ukulele.

The Focus places don't just suspend the memories—the soul—in time, but play them as well. At all times. That melody must be actively played. The orchestra requirements of a specific instruments extends to the Focus as well, not just the hosting human body. The SD card must have its own RAM, CPU, cooling, and Motherboard. While a Graphics card hasn't been implemented in a Focus yet.

Artemy talking to a visible Isidor in P2 is actually just the abattoir acting as an accidental Focus with an implemented GPU; meaning the kin succeed in building what the Stamatins failed, In this essay I WILL

Ignore that forget it back to topic :)

Which is why not just any place can be a Focus, why the Polyhedron succeed where the Cathedral failed. This detail enables the Kains to talk to their "dead" relatives whose souls are in purgatory.

Why Maria can talk to Nina and Simon through sleep, why Victor can hear Nina at all times, why Georgiy can consult Simon.

I'm not sure why their abilities to contact the souls encased in the Focus varies in conditions—why can Nina speak through Victor to the player, but Maria has to sleep or journal to talk to her?—maybe it has something to do with who's the biggest contributor to the memory of the person; Victor knew Nina longer and better than Maira, Georgiy knew Simon longer and better than both of them.

Their immortality is not physical immortality, but that of the legacy and memories. As to why Simon was immune to all diseases and sickness, I think it's correlated to how your very own immune system has its own memory, if it learns how to defend against a sickness once, it will always be able to overcome it. It saves the instructions in its own database and makes copies of the white blood cells that previously worked the last time the sickness came knocking on its door. So by virtue of having a varied immune system database, Simon seems immune to all colds and sick throats.

He probably isn't even the original Simon; They're supposed to be twins yet Georgiy is 77 and the other is 200+ years old. So it could be that Simon was recalled from the Focus into the body of whoever Georgiy's twin was.

Think of it this way: there is a far away kingdom where apples are forbidden by issue of the king and queen. Maybe the prince is deathly allergic to it, maybe it's a religion thing, or maybe they just really really dislike apple pies.

But the people really love apples, in fact they believe life isn't worth living without apples.

So they pool their money and hire a bunch of scientists to find a solution around the issue. The scientists can't bring apples into the kingdom, so they look at another round fruit instead, oranges.

They take an orange, selectively breed it and chemically treat it until it tastes just like an apple!

But the people aren't satisfied, sure it tastes like an apple but it doesn't smell like an apple. It doesn't look like an apple, and its texture is not that of an apple.

So the scientists go back to the lab, they try again, with a pear this time around.

They selectively breed it into a round apple-like shape, they inject apple flavouring into it, and they dye its skin the most shiny red.

In fact, it looks so much like an apple post-treatment, that their test groups could never differentiate between it and the real thing. The people are rejoiced! Their apples are back!

And the king and queen can't find a fault in this loophole, and these new apples don't trigger the allergy reaction in their son, so they allow it!

An apple, is whatever other people's memories of an apple is.

This pear acts, looks, tastes, and smells exactly like how other people expect an apple to, then It might as well be an apple.

If a person walks, talks, behaves, and looks exactly like how other people expect Simon to, then it might as well be Simon Kain.

And that's how you fool death and become an Immortal.

You make a copy of yourself which will live, a version of you suspended in time that you'll update every single day by going into your own Focus. And when the time comes, you take a pear, and alter it into an apple. But it must be a pear, the closest relative to apples, otherwise you'll get an orange, that while tastes like an apple, makes the nastiest texture in apple pies.

[shaibonbon]

Well tell us about the graduation then

Sure! As the names implies, it's when Bonbon graduates from school, and she gets sad. See how sad she is in the drawing, what's the mystery? :0

Ok jokes aside, big lore dump warning bellow (if you haven't read the previous post, I highly recommend it):

Graduating school (or for Americans I guess it's highschool). It's the end of a chapter of your life and a beginning of a new one. It isn't any different for Bonbon, but considering I already said it's the final piece of how we got nowadays Bonbon...

There are a few things you need to keep in mind to understand Bonbon situation. First, you may recall Bonbon is almost friendless, having just 1 friend, Cinnamon. Bonbon literally maintained friendship with just 1 person all the way up graduation, she is logically heavily depended on that friendship. So much so the moment they got distant for a period, bonbon went into downhill spiral. Graduation means you stop seeing your classmates (by extension friends) daily, slowly and steady you start talking less too. You probably see where I'm going with this. It is a ticking time bomb before the course of life separates them..

The second thing you need to know, is related to how Bonbon graduated. Sure, she finished school and did the final exams, but didn't end up with the best grades, especially on that "easy year", where everyone else managed to get better grades than normal. See, the bomb now explodes. Bonbon ends up to failing to enter any university. Needless to say, this was emotionally devastating for her. And while she had a easier time coping by distracting herself, she was far from okay mentally.

What happens is, Bonbon would spend the next year in a special school to improve some of her grades, so she could try and enter university again. Yes, a new school even further away. The bonus, the classes were at night! Lovely arriving home at 23:30. Who needs a good sleep schedule when you can sleep all morning am right? More time to lazy around. Cinnamon on the other hand entered uni in another city, so far away she had to move there due to atrocious travel times. There was now a curious problem, both were super far apart and on different schedules of free time. Talking with one another suddenly became super hard, and they ended up talking only on weekends. Cinamon adapted the same way as before, by just talking with her other friends. Bonbon on the other hand, for what should be no surprise, made 0 attempts to make friends on the new school, never speaking to anybody unless she was spoken to. There was only 1 time someone tried to befriend her by introducing themselves, bonbon ended up forgetting their names and face 10 minutes later. Interpret that however you want.

As time passes, those weekends talks delude to just few monthly talks, as Cinnamon would extend the time with the friends on weekends too. For her it wasn't a matter of choosing, she just invites bonbon to the conversations with her group of friends. Sadly, it just made the bunny feel worse. Put yourself in her perspective, being in a group of people you don't get along, where everyone is in university talking about their successful life's are, while you are at the button, hits hard doesn't it? Well, it made her feel like a failure. I'm unsure if I made it obvious, but ever since Bonbon fails to enter university, she just gets slowly worse and worse across that year. An extremely bad sleep schedule for a year makes anyone way grumpier, add in a heavy dose of sarcasm for a bad mood to handle others into the mix, she feels constantly demotivated to study or try things, is extremely lazy, horrible low self-esteem... I could go on but the word 'depressed' probably describes it all symptoms well. Also, from this point forward, you will rarely see her smile. The result by the end up the year is nowadays Bonbon. She is technically at her worse during the year, she does improve a bit afterwards.

Welp, thats it! Graduation is probably the most WIP chapter, there are parts here that need more detailing or changes. But the general core idea is that Bonbon fails to enter university and she basically loses her best friend. I haven't mentioned, but they both never see each other again. (at least, for the part of the lore I have layed out)

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hey sex witch, you’ve talked a lot about porn addiction on here but I have some other questions if that’s ok.

I go to Christian highschool and we often have discussions about porn addiction.

my teacher says that most addicted people start consuming porn at around 9. And that even seeing one naked person or one porn or whatever on the internet can put you at higher risk of developing an addiction to porn.

does absolutely any of this have a base in science? Or is this all fear mongering and what not?

hi anon,

first of all, I just want to say that I think it rules that you're seeking information outside of what's being taught at your school. learning how to question what you're told and seek out answers from other sources is a really important skill that can be VERY hard to even begin if you aren't given the resources to easily go looking for information, and I think it's great that you're taking the initiative of seeking out other perspectives :)

now, let's break this down: the concept of "porn addiction" is one largely discredited by psychologists. while people can certainly develop maladaptive coping mechanisms around sexuality, porn, and/or masturbation, this isn't strictly the same as addiction, and several studies have found that the people who are most likely to identify themselves as porn addicts are people who harbor religious or cultural shame about sexuality and porn use, rather than people who use porn more than the average person. it is, largely, a matter of perception.

while access to smartphones means that many people first encounter pornography at a young age - the current average age is somewhere between 9 and 13, depending on the study - and that can be confusing to a child who isn't given the proper framework to understand what they're seeing, it's also not a new phenomenon. in my role as a sex educator I also get to talk with a lot of parents about their early sexual experiences, and many of them recall encountering printed pornography as children when they find it in gutters, the woods, the bedroom of parents or friends' parents, or even stowed in farm equipment. these adults tend to remember being intrigued and excited along with a little confused or alarmed by this first brush with sexuality, but crucially it did not define them as people. as evidence by the fact that they've grown up to send their children to queer-friendly, sex positive, nonjudgmental sex ed classes, early exposure to porn did not stop them from growing into curious, thoughtful, and supportive parents who want to encourage healthy attitudes toward sexuality for their children. porn alone does not have the power to determine the direction of someone's life.

just seeing a naked person or pornography on the internet also cannot immediately make you an "addict." as you've already guessed, this is what we call fear mongering, using information in a way that's exaggerated to make people nervous to even engage with a topic. fear mongering about sex is common among adults and education systems that don't want to young people to be curious about their bodies; another common one is "teaching" young people about sexually transmitted infections by only showing them pictures of untreated cases that have become drastic and painful while insisting that no STI can ever be treated, which is definitely not the case. but the facts don't matter; the priority is trying to make sure teenagers are too scared to have sex until they're adults and the school system is no longer responsible for them.

(and it doesn't even work; states with higher rates of abstinence only education are CONSISTENTLY among those with the highest rates of teen pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections.)

when presented with absolutist statements like this, it's worth poking holes in the logic. for instance, if seeing any naked figure is bad, what about classical art? do nude marble statues put you at risk of being a porn addict? what about other artistic depictions of nudity? or anatomical illustrations? what about real people just changing clothes in a locker room, or young siblings bathing together? does it not count for people who are nearly or partially nude, like someone wearing a bathing suit or athletic clothes? people changing in a locker room together? what about young children being bathed together? and what about all of those depictions about Jesus on the cross wearing nothing but a loincloth? what's the line between "good" and "bad" nudity, and who's deciding where that line is? can such a line even really exist at all?

the truth is that people are undressed or partially undressed in all kinds of situations, and none of them are a corrosive influence on your brain. just looking at something is not enough to completely rewire your brain and permanently change your behavior. ultimately, you are responsible for your own actions.

I hope this has been a helpful answer, and that you stay curious about what you're being taught.