#i mean i guess it's not *dio's* back but technically i mean

[diagonal-queen]

if i had a nickel for every fictional british vampire who is generally a flamboyant prick, graduated law school in their time as a mortal, has a plot-relevant symbol of some sort on their back, and who i desire carnally, i would have two nickels. which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice

[taylormarieee]

Fuck me like you want me MiggyMiguel O'Hara

Summary: Your desperate for Miguel after he gets out of the shower...

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Fem!Hispanic!Reader

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: PiV sex, Dirty talk, Needy reader, Dom!Miguel, Sub!Reader, Praise Kink, Degrading Kink, V-Line obsession, Breeding Kink, Begging, Orgasm Denial, Established Relationship

A/N: This is dedicated to my princess @ribbonprincess since technically today is her birthday so Happy birthday my love!

BIRTHDY FIC 1/3

You and Miguel were the best couple. Not only was he the famous Spider-Man but he was also a scientist.

You were a Bartender so you had to work nights. Not all the time Miguel liked it but he couldn't really complain because he always had emergency calls at the spider society during sex making him grumpy for the rest of the night.

Or people from his Firm needed him to solve an experiment for them. Either way you both were extremely busy but you always found time for each other nonetheless.

When you guys had dinner together it was always enjoyable leading to sex all night.

You two have a great relationship but Miguel could be a bit of a tease. And granted you did love it, it was stressful when you were pent up and he said no.

You were waiting for Miguel to get out of the shower, you were sitting on the toilet in the bathroom as the room fogged up and you reminisced in the heat.

The glass to the shower was blurry and fogged up so all you could see was his figure and his tanned skin.

"Miggy, please!?" You begged, "I need you. I'm so horny right now and you know what that means." You finalize with a hint so Miguel would get it.

It's clear you were ovulating and that explains why your extremely horny. So you hoped hinting to it would make Miguel relent his torture with the word no but-

"No Carino, Te amo querida pero no." He finalized his no and you pout.

(No Darling, I love you dear but no.)

"Pero Miguel, ¿pensé que me amabas? Realmente te necesito." You whine.

(But Miguel, I thought you loved me? I really need you.")

He shakes his head and steps out the shower. His towel hugging his slutty waist and nice toned body.

His toned abs flexing when he breathes and his chest heaving while he slowly breathes in and out.

You stare at him, mouth wide open as you admire your boyfriend. His body nice and wet from getting out the shower.

His hair slicked back from him running his large, long fingers through his silky soft hair.

"Damn Miguel, Te ves muy bien mojada. Hablando de estar mojado..." You smirk at him and he chuckles shaking his head.

(You look very good wet. Speaking of being wet…)

"Princesa, te amo pero no ahora".

(Princess, I love you but not right now.)

You pout your lips a little more and make your doe eyes bigger. He looks at you, sighs before shaking his head no and walking over to the sink.

You watch as he walks over to the sink, admiring his body. The way his abs flex, his slutty waist, his V-line, his happy trail and etc. Ugh you loved his arms as well.

The faint scratches left from a few nights ago on his back, the hickeys you left him this morning before he woke up.

He looked like a fucking god to you. His big muscles and broad back. The more you looked at him the more you set yourself up for failure.

"Miggy..."

"Princessa..." He warns giving you a stern look. You look at him with pouty lips and finally just walk out the bathroom.

"Fine. I guess I'll go ask Hobie if he's in the mood for some good hispanic pussy." You say as you walk towards the bed to grab your phone to call Hobie.

Miguel's eyes widen, Hobie was insufferable so he quickly went to you and snatched the phone out your hand before you could even press his name to call.

"Princessa... always so needy aye? Aye dios mio que voy a hacer contigo?" he says in a low seductive voice.

(Oh my god, what am I going to do with you?)

"What you can do is fuck the shit outta me no questions asked..." You say with your best puppy dog eyes. You were being extra clingy today, you blame the fact that your ovulating.

He picks you up and kisses you roughly. "Such a bad girl... you gonna be a good slut for me?" He asks as he throws you on the bed and begins ripping your clothes off.

You nod your head and whine at the feeling of the cool air brushing your pussy lips. Clit sore and throbbing as the feeling gets more intense by the second just looking at Miguel.

"I need words Mi amor, words." He says as his long fingers rub tight figure eights on your clit. You squirm and whine and mumble out an "Yes miggy! I'll be a good s-slut for you!"

He smirks and drops his towel his big fat juicy cock making it's lovely appearance. Your mouth instantly started watering at the sight. He ran his cock along your wet slick folds and you whimper at the friction.

In your mind you wanna just grind on him and force his cock to slide into your soaking entrance but you keep repeating in your mind 'Be a good girl, be a good girl' because you know how mean Miguel can get when your not a good girl.

You stay still and let him do his work while you watch him get his cock nice and wet with your arousal. "Miggy pleaseee, i-ive been good haven't I?" you ask, whining at how good his cock feels on your folds.

He chuckles darkly before inhaling sharply at the feeling of his leaking tip slip in your entrance. "Yea, you've been a good girl princess. I guess you can get this dick now." he replies pushing further into you.

You let out a whine at the stretch your pussy is making to accommodate Miguels fat cock. your eyes roll to the back of your head as you let out a content sigh and close your eyes after finally getting what you've been begging for.

"Mierda my love, your so tight." he whispers against your ear, burying his face in your neck.

Your cunt clenches at Miguels voice and his words. You tap his shoulder as a sign to start moving and he begins to grind against you.

Slowly pulling his cock all the way out till the tip is only in and then plunging himself right back into your warm cunt.

"Oh fuck Miguel!" you cry out as he continues his relentless pace on your cunt. Your body feels like it's floating and you feel so euphoric with Miguel inside you.

his thrusts sending you into a state of pleasure, you don't even care if the neighbors complain about the headboard hitting the wall, all you cared about was Miguel and this moment, this moment that has been put off for so long.

Your hands embracing his large back and arms leaving more marks on his his god-like body. "Fuck beautiful, you feel so good, gonna cum in this pretty pussy yea?" he groans out.

"Wanna give you all my babies yea? Have all my kids, wanna see your belly nice and swole holding my child." He whispers in your ear, you moan out.

"Yes yes yes! I wanna have your babies Miggy, please!" you cry out as his pace surprisingly gets faster.

"Good girl, such a good girl for me." He praises. Your on the edge, and that praise it's self was enough to throw you over the edge but miguel feels how your tensing up.

He feels how your pussy is squeezing him so well. He pulls out before you could even touch the feeling of pleasurable heaven, before you could even relish and drown in the pool of pleaseure.

"Oh mi amor, you thought that you were gonna cum that easily? tsk tsk, no no mi amor, I need to cum in this pretty pussy first. Make sure all my cum stays in there nice, tight and warm." He says

You cry out at the feeling of being empty before your filled right back up to the brim with Miguels big fat cock.

After a couple more thrusts and dirty talk, Miguel is almost there. He's so close to cumming and giving you his babies.

He's never wanted anything so badly then to see you bare his child. To see you walk around with clothes that barely fit cause your stomachs always poking out.

To be able to feel the first kick of that baby growing in your stomach. Nothing has ever clouded and made his lust more powerful then fantasizing about you having his child inside you.

"Fuck fuck fuck! Gonna c-cum, fuck i'm gonna cum in this pussy muñeca." he groans

He thrusts 3 more times before he stills inside of you shooting his sperm inside you, the feeling of him painting your walls white carries you over the edge and you feel the wave of pleasure rush over your body as you shake and convulse from your mind-blowing orgasm.

"Fuck!" you cry out as you grip onto his shoulders to ground yourself. You close your eyes trying to catch your breath as Miguel begins to pull out.

He watches as some of him cum seeps out of your cunt. He uses his finger to push all of it back inside you.

He climbs up o your face and gives you a sweet kiss on your temple and a passionate kiss on your lips.

"Can't wait to have such a domestic life with you mama." he says with a smile on his face.

"I love you miggy"

"I love you more princessa."

Taglist:@oharaslover @willyoubemycherryy @cherryredstarsreblogs /@cherryredstars @versatilehater @dustbunniess / @evbunnie

[naomijoestar]

Hi I, I thought of a funny scenario in which Giorno is having an identity crisis about having two biological fathers but Reader is exchanging glances with Mista and Narancia because it's not adding up? How does that work? But the three of them feel like idiots, maybe one of them starts to laugh nervously (hysterics) which prompts the rest of the Bucci Gang to intervene? (It unfolds in more chaos). Sorry if this is so random but sksksks it just popped up in my mind 😭👍 I guess this is more of a platonic scenario but I'll leave that up to you, thank you and sorry for the messy request

Masterlist here <3

This is so silly and I loved writing it, I hope you enjoy!

Giorno’s crisis and funny chaos

It all starts with Giorno thoughtfully pacing the room. “It’s just…sometimes I wonder who I am. I mean, biologically speaking, I have two fathers. DIO, who is technically Jonathan Joestar, and…well, biologically that doesn’t make sense.”

You glance at Mista, who’s frowning and squinting like he’s trying to do algebra in his head. Narancia leans toward you, whispering, “Does Giorno mean, like…two guys? How does that work? Like, scientifically?”

Mista, clearly overthinking it, mutters under his breath, “Maybe it’s like…a frog thing. You know, like how some frogs can—”

You interrupt, “Mista, that’s not how human biology works.”

Narancia squints at Giorno, then looks at you and Mista. “Wait, are we saying Giorno is a frog now?”

The three of you exchange increasingly baffled glances while Giorno’s lamentations about identity continue in the background. Then, out of nowhere, Mista lets out a nervous chuckle

You side eye him, confused. But then Narancia starts giggling too, more out of secondhand awkwardness than anything else. Your lips twitch—you’re trying so hard to keep it together, but the absurdity of the situation is getting to you

The giggles snowball into full-blown hysterics. Mista is doubled over, tears streaming down his face as he wheezes, “Two dads…how?!” Narancia is laughing so hard he’s gasping for air, slapping the nearest table for support

Giorno pauses mid-monologue, turning to the three of you with a mix of confusion and mild offense. “I don’t see what’s so funny about my existential dilemma.”

Before you can explain (not that you’d know how), Bruno steps in, visibly concerned. “What’s going on here?”

“Giorno has two dads!” Narancia blurts out between laughs, gesturing wildly toward Giorno

“We know,” Fugo says, pinching the bridge of his nose like he’s already done with this conversation

“Do we, though?!” Mista exclaims, throwing his hands up. “Do we really understand it?!”

At this point, Abbacchio chimes in with a groan, “If I have to listen to another word about Giorno’s parentage, I’m going to walk into the ocean.”

Trish, sipping her drink, raises an eyebrow. “Honestly, I always assumed it was just…Joestar weirdness. Why are we dissecting this now?”

Giorno, still frustrated, tries to bring the conversation back to his identity crisis, but his voice is drowned out by Mista and Narancia arguing over whether frogs or seahorses are a better analogy for Giorno’s situation

And you? You’re stuck in the middle, trying (and failing) to mediate while also laughing uncontrollably because, really, how did it come to this?

If you’d like anything changed or added, you can always message me and I’ll fix it!

If you enjoyed this make sure to check out my other posts, and if you’d like anything specific written for a jjba character/squad you can request it if my requests are open!

[no2ticonderoga]

Still searching for a title... Part I, Part II, Part III

Leo found her before she could find Mr. D. Leo was a short, curly haired man who seemed to be perpetually covered in dust and grease. The theatre’s technical director, he could fix just about anything with chewing gum and shoe shine, it seemed. 

“Sorry about earlier,” he said. “I was up to my elbows in cables.”

“It’s fine,” Annabeth sighed. “I was just hoping to get to you before Mr. D caught me.”

“No kidding,” Leo snorted. “I only just avoided him by hiding in the lighting grid. What crawled up his ass and died there this time?” 

“Act two,” Annabeth replied.

“Madre di dios,” Leo muttered, followed by several other Spanish oaths. “Let me guess. Mr. D decided he wanted it to be ‘grandiose, and carry the audience away’?” Leo had an excellent impersonation.

“Yep,” Annabeth agreed.

Leo muttered more in Spanish and shook his head. “You got new designs?”

“If you mean the old designs that he rejected two weeks ago, then yes,” Annabeth held up her sketches. 

“Atta girl,” Leo grinned. “These the ones you already showed me?”

“Yep,” Annabeth agreed. 

“I’ll get my crews prepped,” he said. “Let me know which one he decides on.”

Annabeth nodded. “Have you seen him?”

Leo jerked a thumb over his shoulder. “Last I saw him, he was headed for the lobby. He was complaining about something. Costumes, I think.”

“More delays?”

“Yeah,” Leo sighed. “You’d think the war was still on with rationing or something…nothing ever seems to come on time.” Leo gave a wave and headed off to talk to his stagehands.

Annabeth made her way through the backstage and out into the house, headed for the lobby. She had only gotten part way up the aisle, when she heard voices at the back of the house. One of them was Mr. D and he sounded…nervous?

She stopped and looked around. She spotted Mr. D standing in one of the doorways. He was standing with a man dressed in a black suit. He was very pale, with dark hair, and though he stood there holding his hat in his hands, there seemed to be something ominous about him. 

She couldn’t quite make out what the man was saying, but Mr. D was protesting about it, though not effectively. The man said something sharp, and Mr. D nodded meekly. Without another word, the man turned and left, leaving Mr. D standing there looking downcast. 

Annabeth hesitated a moment before approaching him. “Mr. D?” she asked.

“What, oh, hm?” he looked up, and Annabeth was suddenly struck by how hollow his eyes looked and how his who being seemed to be sagging. 

“I’ve got those other set drawings for you,” Annabeth said.

Life seemed to come back into him slowly, and he seemed to reinflate, like a balloon. “Ah, good,” he said, his voice returning to his normal pompousness. “Let me see.”

By the time  a new design had been selected, and Annabeth had helped Leo oversee the start of the modifications to the set, it was nearly dinner, and as Annabeth had skipped lunch, she was starving.

She went to find Piper. Annabeth figured she’d be in the rehearsal studio, and she was not wrong. The session was just breaking up, with chorus dancers streaming past her heading for dressing room. Inside the studio, she found Octavian,arguing with the show’s composer, Will, by the piano. But Piper was leaning against the wall, talking with Jason, who had one arm propped against the wall over Piper’s head. She was giving him come hither looks that probably would have melted steel. 

Annabeth normally wouldn’t have interrupted, but she was hungry. “Hi,” she said to Jason before turning to Piper. “Do you still want to get food, or are you…” she glanced between Piper and Jason. “Otherwise occupied?”

Piper laughed lightly, and pushed Jason away from her gently. “I’m all yours tonight, sweetie,” she said. “Jason will just have to wait his turn.” She gave him a wicked smile.

“I don’t mind,” Jason said. “I would hate to break up your dinner date.” He smiled brilliantly, and Annabeth was reminded again why everyone was in love with him. She felt no attraction to him, but even she had to admit he was objectively good looking. Even the scar on his face enhanced his good looks.

Annabeth sighed. “You’re welcome to tag along,” she said. “But I’m starving.”

“If you don’t mind,” he said.

“It’s fine,” Annabeth said. “As long as we go now.”

Piper laughed. “Let me go get changed. We’ll meet at the stage door in 10 minutes.”

They went their separate ways to get ready to go out. Annabeth went to wait by the stage door. While she was waiting, Mrs. Darrowby, the costumer, was getting ready to leave. “Goodnight, Mrs. Darrowby,” Annabeth said.

“I heard Mr. D was giving you a hard time today, dear,” Mrs. Darrowby said. 

Annabeth shrugged. “Nothing I can’t handle,” she replied.

Mrs. Darrowby gave her a sad grin. “Well, at least you were able to get something done.”

“What do you mean?” Annabeth asked, confused.

“My fabric for the chorus line costumes was supposed to arrive today, but it’s been delayed again. This is the third time,” she complained. “It’s like I’m never going to get these done. At this rate, the chorus girls will go on in their underwear!” 

“Well, that might boost ticket sales,” Annabeth joked.

Mrs. Darrowby snorted. “At this rate, we might need to do it anyway, just to keep the show afloat.” She shook her head. “Well, hopefully tomorrow,” she sighed. “Good night, dear.”

“Good night,” Annabeth called, as Mrs. Darrowby headed out the door.

Jason appeared. “Is Piper ready yet?”

“She’ll be here shortly,” Annabeth told him. “When she says 10 minutes, she really means 15,” Annabeth explained. Actually it was usually more like 20, but Annabeth hoped that Piper’s concern for getting food into her might actually move her a little faster.

“How long have you two known each other?” Jason asked.

“Since college,” Annabeth said. “The fall of ‘41.” 

“You’re pretty close, huh?” he asked.

Annabeth shrugged. “She’s the sister I never had.”

“So don’t break her heart?” Jason asked.

Annabeth laughed. “She’s far more likely to break yours,” Annabeth told him.

Jason looked like he was still trying to process this comment when Piper appeared. As always, her hair and makeup were perfect, despite her vigorous rehearsal session, and the dress she had on worked for her in all the right ways. Annabeth loved her, but when she was on the hunt, she always made Annabeth feel so plain and dowdy. 

Piper looped her arm through Jason’s. “Where shall we go?” she said. She grabbed Annabeth with her other arm. “Somewhere not busy for poor Annabeth, who skipped lunch, I think.”

“Yes, please,” Annabeth agreed. 

They ended up at a place close to the theatre district that did not look crowded and they were able to get a table right away. 

“You had a busy day, it seems,” Jason asked her when they were settled and the waitress had taken their orders. Piper and Annabeth shared one side of the booth, while Jason sat alone on the other. 

“You could say that,” Annabeth agreed. “Working with Mr. D is…an adventure.”

Piper laughed. “That’s one way to put it.”

“Have you worked with him before?” Jason asked.

“Several times,” Annabeth admitted. “One of the reasons Piper was able to get me the job to begin with was he knew who I was.” 

“This is my first time,” Jason said. “Are his shows always this…” he trailed off, considering his words.

“Chaotic?” Piper provided helpfully. She was running her finger around a water ring left behind by a previous diner’s drink. 

“Well,” Annabeth considered. “He’s always been mercurial,” she said. “But now that you mention it.” She paused, brows furrowing a little. 

Piper looked thoughtful, cocking her head. “It does seem like we’ve had more than our usual share of disasters. Maybe the show is cursed.”

Annabeth and Jason spoke at the same time. “Why would it be cursed?” 

“There’s no such thing as curses.”

Piper huffed, and glared at Annabeth. “You clearly haven’t been in show business long enough,” she said, and then turned to Jason. “I haven’t been paying too close attention, but I did hear some of the chorus girls talking about a curse. Maybe it’s the curse of Achilles.” She made the last part sound spooky and creepy.

“That’s…not how that works,”  Annabeth said. “Have you even read the myth?” 

Piper made a mou face and brushed this away with her hands. “You don’t think a doomed love story can have a curse?” 

“Well, even if it did, and I can’t believe I’m having this conversation, it wouldn’t be the curse of Achilles. He’s barely in the show, it’s about the Trojans, not the Greeks.” Annabeth shook her head.

“He’s in the show long enough to kill me,” Jason pointed out. “But that feels pretty cursed to me.”

“All I’m saying,” Piper said. “Is this is starting to feel like a Scottish play production, and I’ve been in one of those.”

“Scottish play? You mean MacBeth?” Annabeth asked.

“Stop that, stop it now! Here,” Piper thrust the salt shaker at her. “Over your shoulder, now! Go on.”

Annabeth fumbled with the shaker. “What? Piper…”

“Now.” The look she gave was not to be argued with. 

Annabeth sighed and shook some salt out and made to throw.

“Your left shoulder,” Piper corrected. Annabeth dutifully threw the salt. 

“You’re ridiculous,” Annabeth said.

“I should make you stand up, turn around three times, and spit,” Piper said. “But this will have to do for now, since we’re not in a theater.”

Jason just looked amused. 

“Do you believe this nonsense?” Annabeth asked him.

“Hey, I grew up in theatre, too, don’t forget. And if that wasn’t enough, the war would have definitely made me a believer.”

Annabeth…glare was probably too strong…glower might have been better. She found it harder to discount men’s experiences of the war than Piper’s ridiculous theater superstitions. 

“What kinds of beliefs did you have in the war?” Piper asked.

“You never talked about how many missions you had until your rotation ended,” Jason explained. “And lots of guys had specific routines about checking out their aircraft before take off, or they carried lucky charms and stuff. In my unit, we didn’t have an aircraft with the number 13 on it, it was painted up as 12B.”

“What kind of lucky charms?” Piper asked. 

“Oh, all sorts of things. St. Christopher medals were popular, rosaries of course. One guy had a silk scarf that his girlfriend made him from the parachute he used to bailout in training when his engine quit.” Jason was warming to his topic. “One guy had a pair of stockings that he got from…” he stopped abruptly and colored. “Uh, from someone he knew.” 

Annabeth felt her face heat a little, but she smiled weakly. Piper, on the other hand grinned broadly, and she leaned in toward him, batting her eyelashes. “Oh, really,” she said, as she leaned her chin on her fist and gave him a look. “What kind of someone, hmmm?” she arched an eyebrow at him.

Jason stuttered and jumped, and Annabeth was fairly certain Piper had just touched his leg with her foot. 

Annabeth cleared her throat. “Piper, you promised.”

Piper sat up. “Right, I’m sorry.” She gave Jason a saucy look. “We’ll take that up again later, hmm?”

Jason’s eyes were a bit wild, but he grinned back gamely. “Right.”

“So, did you have any lucky charms?” Piper asked.

“I always went up with this old Roman coin that my dad gave me,” Jason said, shrugging. “I’m here, so I guess it worked.”

“And that’s a good thing,” Piper declared. “See, Annabeth, superstitions aren’t bad.”

“That...correlation is not causation,” Annabeth protested, but their food arrived, and Piper wasn’t in a mood to listen. Jason gave her a sympathetic look. 

They ate, and Annabeth felt worlds better after they were finished. It was clear to Annabeth that Piper wanted to find a way to extend her evening with Jason, so she plead exhaustion (it wasn’t hard), and said she didn’t mind going home alone. “Are you sure?” Piper asked. “I had wanted to talk tonight.”

“I’m fine,” Annabeth told her. “There’s nothing that hasn’t already been said, you know that.” Piper spared a moment to give her a sympathetic look. “Go,” Annabeth told her. “Have fun. Don’t stay out too late.”

“Yes, mother,” Piper laughed. “Don’t worry,” she assured her more seriously. “We have rehearsal tomorrow. Tonight is not a night for sleepovers.” 

For all her playfulness, Piper was completely dedicated to her craft, so Annabeth wasn’t really worried. She bid farewell to both Piper and Jason and hailed a cab. When the cabbie had asked her where to, instead of her address, her mouth said. “The Battery.”

She felt foolish as the cab cruised downtown, and twice she almost told the cab driver to turn around. But she got out and paid her fare, and walked to the edge of the wharf, leaned on the rail and stared out at the Statue of Liberty in the harbor. She sighed.

Anger or sadness? Which would it be tonight? She wondered.

But oddly, she felt neither. 

She felt strange tonight, like the summer air was somehow charged with electricity. It was almost like the city was holding its breath. Maybe it was the election, or maybe it was the growing tension over Berlin. But something…

Annabeth felt a chill, despite the warm air, and rubbed her bare arms. 

She recognized at least part of what she was feeling. And she didn’t like it. She knew this feeling, and it scared her. It happened once or twice a year, despite her best efforts.

It was the tiniest, smallest sliver of her that didn’t believe that Percy was dead. Or that he had played her. It was the hope that he was still alive, still out there. And that maybe he would come back to her. 

She bit her lip, looking out at the statue, remembering the feeling of his arms around her. Wishing he was here right now. She thought about Piper, off with Jason, the easy way she could talk to anyone. How easy it had been with Percy. Why? She had no idea, but it had been as natural as breathing. She remembered telling him things after only a few hours that it had taken her almost a year before she told Piper. 

“I want him back,” she spoke out loud.

No one responded, of course, but Annabeth suddenly felt a frisson up her spine, like a small shock. She jumped, and looked around, but there was no one.

Sighing, and feeling very foolish, Annabeth walked back toward State Street. Hopefully she could find another cab to take her home. 

[strikersin]

Dear Diary,

Today I am 15 years old. Just lying. My birthday is Not June 13th. You'll remember that about me, if not other things. You'll say you don't remember, but you do. I guess I didn't really mind it. It seemed par for the course of my existence so far. I mean, I would go so far to say that I deserved it. I'm not looking for conjecture here, whether I did or not, just letting you know where I'm at. It was a natural consequence. Naturally, consequences happen. I am not a consequence-free person, nor am I consequence-prone. Things happen and they have to happen. Like me. I'm alive for a reason.

Emancipated minor. Heh. I would have rocked that. Except it wasn't really going to work out for me. Fugo would. Teru did.

Click. So many things are bothering me. In my mind lately, just everywhere. And I can't shut it off. The thing that connects me to me isn't very pleasant to experience. Or, I can't shut it off very well. Drugs and alcohol, music, it kind of does the trick. But it makes the weirdo hallucinationlessness of it all very scary. So it's like... oh you have mental problems. Oh. I... know already.

I can see my face really well. Haha! To think of this face as my face — and the specific expressions that I use. Well, karkat my bomb-omb doesn't get to have the same thing.

What a sad bunch of people. I don't see how singularity would help, except in terms of focus. I could laser focus my way through this. Jonathan is way too aware of himself. He can't do anything. Well, he's totally not allowed on my blog, so I'm aware talking further would be behind his back. It's all so... weird. Again! Stop judging me, I can't turn this thing off. Used to be so human, when'd you really leave... leave; it's going to be autumn. AND NO IT'S NOT SUMMER YET! It's not that part of June.

June is supposed to be my safe month. I've spent every day... busy. The last few days unable to process the time passing. I feel like something inside me has split open, and I'm waiting to see...

Also -_- i can literally hear the background music, guys. I know the shoe is hovering now. I guess maybe this will be the answer to Jonathan's emotional state. And I'll get some real wisdom for the rest of my life. It's definitely seemed like every thing has shaken me up, and that it had to be this way, for some reason.

NoOOOOO, I don't want to talk to my dad again. I want to watch daredevil. I want to want to watch Firefly, to watch LOTR. How am I supposed to face Sam and Frodo yet?

Noo, I have to see my real dad, squeak. I mean my Other Father. I mean the biological one. Speak, Michael! Speak! Why! I don't want to see him! Why! Do we have to live in the same city? I mean, [willing myself to calm down] technically no. I will live in [local city] and work security with Cos.

Ahahaha, my girl is really cute right now. I mean, my friend. I would land an airplane off that. I mean I'm not gqy— i mean to say,

Wow. She has freckles on her knees that are really cute.

I mean to say— I'm sorry I'm Michael. Yeah, I dunno, I'm just sorry for being...

Spike, tho?

Except for when Lunaria says it to me because no matter what I feel <<<

The alligator is eating another number. It's eating HER.

Feelings are so weird, man. Maya wants up. Ugghhhh. Hehehe she's cuddling Callie now. It's really cute. Will Graham has been coaching me in dogs now. I've had it bad lately, um, I guess because I've been out here so much. Anyways I'm not gay.

We drove to [larger city] today and I don't know. I love Dio so much. I can't even remember who was in the car. Ah, the music. It was Pierre. So that means either Dmitriy or Fyo. As well as Jonathan all-fucking-day again. I don't want to think about this morning. He doesn't want to think about anything, all the time, it seems like. Fyo likes to be around Pierre so she's always happy even though the popular opinion of her is not favorable. Though I don't even know why. I wonder if I poked him, if he'd stop. I want to have dreams again. Hello. Remember.

Selfish, selfish reasons. GAH! MY CAR. I wonder if this ever happened to Dean Winchester after their dad gave him the impala. And he like just has it in season one. I interpreted this as being something important his father left him before he went missing, you know, and that added to the urgency.

-_-? You know who else has urgency? Ugh, no wonder Jonathan, that guy is so stressed out all the time. This is what you have to confront: would your father love you if you were a gay man? I mean bisexual? you would just be the same, right? I think, what does that mean to you?

MY CAR? MY CAR? And Pauline got mad too. That's what you've done. I should spray the centerpiece with something smelly. I want it to smell like that rhubarb daily meyers soap.

Ugh, I'm sorry my name is Michael. Oops, this is too close to real life stuff now. Ughhhh, and for existing. I need to take up martial arts again. I don't care if it's practicing at home in the mirror.

Luke? LUKE. You don't like onions? That's so scary, I would never want my mom to yell that name. I would not have made it as a guy. Actually, I wouldn't have killed myself. Eww. My legs are sticky. I am going to pet clover.

Gah! So, I want to tell you what it's like to be 15. It sucks, you start to see some of the advantages but overall it sucks. I mean some of it is great, if you're into that. NOOO, I don't want to talk to my dad on the phone again. You're going to say "just so we're clear..." it's going to be like Christmas and getting a tree in a scary condition. It's Christmas! No it's not. I think it's Christmas tomorrow actually. No, tomorrow is Christmas Eve. So tomorrow we'll get ready for Christmas. "I'm going to say one thing..." no, no, no! Now that I've written them, it will probably be me who says them. At least Jonathan is here. I don't really remember that phone call, or what it said. I remember ohhh uuggghhh I did something that was wrong, I mean mega-stupid, which was one : reference the past and two : respond in the most dumb manner one can assume : yes sir!

I don't even know what to say for Fyo. I feel bad for her. I may be emotionally shut off in this regard. Oops, I kind of just want to let it go now. There's a train going by. Mm! The laundry . Ah, hm. I feel bad.

I have to go potty. Trying not to cry lmfao. Relax relax relax. My ability to do this is inhibited. My ability to experience pleasure is low. I still think I can change all of this.

I don't know what to do >_< I want to send my mom a song. Omg. Dies. I think I feel so happy. Ed, gags. Oh, that was what that was there to remind me for. I can't stop thinking about the waterparks.

I have to pee. I have so much planned for so many things. Have so much of it in my mind at all times. It's like I'm a bucket of things. (CCG: NO—). I just have to remind myself what I'm here for. I know what I'm here for. Middle of the road. What does that mean? I would like to be in the middle of the road if I was in Yosemite, driving a small car. Fine, a yellow car. Maybe I'm not even driving. I like being a passenger, but then my life is also in your hands. And in my moms hands, as much as it's humanly possible, I'm safe. And that's been most of my life. Yeah, I know, I'm not going to forget. But actually, that's a LOT of information. Agh. A disembodied dream where overhead there are two girls discussing you, "I think she..." while the girl that you are scrambles to do them. I have never known how to explain myself to other people. Oh. I would like it if I wasn't driving. But you have to drive like someone else. I mean, people need a motive. You can drive safely for someone else. I drive like my father and his movements are so mechanical. I like the fluidity of motion in the car. I like to imagine driving my mom around, preferably in the desert at night. What are we doing there? The stars have finally come out. X

U.G.H. I hate it when my other father is right, umm, no haha I mean I love him. Sad face. This is about a specific memory in my childhood where the universe was implying that my sin would be jealousy. And I hated that message coming from him. I didn't know! Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit. Okay. MN. So, I'm going to need to put on two anklets. I have to pee so bad. I have to tame this beast. Like whaaat! Girl! Oh my gosh. I don't know how to be a person. Imagine me. Kudos to whoever was in the doctor's office. I have to pee so bad. I already literally wrote that.

AWHSJRKAH it looks like a guy again. Only this time, it's kind of like a cool older brother.

I got too high and fell asleep.

[lifeofroos]

A/N: More Dionysus and Ariadne chilling on the shore for @greekgurlluv ! Sweeter this time. @godsofhumanity  (if you still want to be tagged). 

AO3 - KoFi

Divine

‘You’re a god.’

Dionysus looked up at Ariadne. His head was in her lap, and she was sitting in the sand with her back against a cliff. Technically it wasn’t even a beach, more like a strip of sand by the sea. Yet, it was quiet, and that was what they wanted. ‘I am, though there are people who doubt it.’

‘No.’ Ariadne shook her head. ‘There is no doubt.’

‘Then why are you stating this?’ He reached up to stroke her cheek. 

‘It occured to me.’ She put her finger on his forehead and ran it past his nose and cheeks. Carefully, she went over his mouth, and then up again to his eyes, which he closed when she touched them. ‘When you’re with me, you seem very normal.’

‘I am very normal.’

‘No.’

He raised his eyebrows, but kept smiling in the meantime. ‘Once again, why these observations?’

Ariadne sighed. ‘I’ve been thinking about us.’ Dionysus got a pink blush on his cheeks. ‘Eh, I think you might have, too.’

‘Hm-hm.’ Dionysus blinked, long lashes showing, which Ariadne couldn’t help but notice. 

‘Yet, uhm… you know…’ she sighed. ‘You say you love me. But what does that mean to you, Dionysus? Lord of wine, ecstasy and madness?’

Dionysus blinked while searching for an answer. He knew for sure that there was something he felt for this woman that he didn’t feel for others. Something beyond physical attraction. Something that made his heart go pitter-pat when they were close together. ‘The people who say I am not a god are right in the sense that I am human, too. At least, I must be human enough to know what it feels like to love you. I think.’

Ariadne looked down into her lap. ‘I do believe you. But…’

‘But me being a god is making it hard to believe I love you?’

Ariadne shrugged. ‘In some twisted sense, yes, I think so. If not even a human would, why would you?’

‘Muah.’ Dionysus put his hand to her cheek. ‘I don’t know why. It’s not like I haven’t seen pretty faces or kind personalities before. But it’s you… you that makes me feel…’ he looked at her. ‘Like this. Like I want to keep you forever.’ He could feel the blush crawl up his cheeks this time. He sat up, put his hand under Ariadne’s chin and brought his lips to hers. 

After a single kiss, Ariadne pulled back again. She put her head on his shoulder. ‘I have to confess I am getting enough of the antics in my brain. I just want to love you, dammit.’

‘Patience.’ He held her forehead to his, his eyes focussed on her lips. ‘Patience with yourself, sweet. I have it, so why wouldn’t you?’

‘Sick of it. Why do I keep asking these stupid questions? Why am I still afraid you’ll leave me?’ 

‘I knew you’d be asking the questions and I decided to help you with them. So I don’t really mind.’

‘Hm.’ She smiled and kissed him before he could start a new sentence. She ran her hands through his hair, threw her arms around his back and pushed him over, so that he laid down on the sandy patch. She kissed him again, feeling his hands on her back. 

She sat up, with his hips between her legs. ‘Certain?’

‘I love you. Sorry. I mean, yes. I am. I know I’m terrible.’

Despite herself, Ariadne laughed. ‘I think I get it.’ 

‘I’m a fool.’

Ariadne leaned over to kiss him again, softly and carefully. ‘You are.’ 

The sea crashed against the shore, as he pushed himself up, pulled her close and kissed her, for the first of many times to come that evening. 

A/N: I need to be writing Dio/Ari snippets. For my health. That being said I guess I do try to stick to mythology. Lemme know if you noticed anything odd about that. 

[detective-giggles]

(Grand)mother Knows Best

So this fic is going to be a double prompt fill. I started this LAST YEAR for my entry for the Barisi Professions bingo! This is my “Sonny-as-a-nurse” AU.  Now for Flufftober, I have FINALLY finished it and I’m using it for Day 7: Meddling Friends (I mean, technically she’s family but...) Also, please note: No grandmothers were harmed in the making of this fic. Thanks to @moderateshouting for giving me this idea (forever ago). And, thank you to @sarahcakes613 for the beta!

WC:1,461

***

Sonny sighed as he poked at his food. A big pan of homemade lasagna always sounded great in theory, but by the third day, the novelty was gone and he was checking his watch to see if he still had time to run to the bodega on the corner. He had almost decided on Funyuns and a Mountain Dew-the dinner of champions-when someone tapped him on the arm. 

“May I join you?”

“Huh? Oh, of course, Mrs. Diaz.” He shifted and prepared to stand, “do you need help?”

“No,” she waived him off and took a seat at the picnic table across from him, “I’m not as helpless as my grandson thinks.”

Sonny smiled kindly, “I’m sure he doesn’t think that, Mrs. Diaz.”

“I would have been just fine in my apartment,” she insisted.

“And how many flights of stairs was that?” Sonny asked.

She huffed and rolled her eyes. “You sound just like him, you know?” Sonny chuckled as he rummaged through his lunch bag. Residents were always telling him he reminded them of their sons or grandsons. It was a compliment.  He hoped. “You seem like a nice boy. I bet you’d never stick your abuela in a place like this.”

Sonny shrugged and took a bite from an apple. “I couldn’t afford to stick my nonna in a place like this.”

“You’re always here on Fridays. Saturdays too.  A handsome young man like you... your wife doesn’t mind you leaving her home alone all weekend?”

“Mrs. Diaz-”

“Catalina. Please, call me Catalina.”

“Catalina, you know I’m not married,” Sonny sighed.

“Do you want to be?” 

Sonny opened his mouth and then closed it, clearing his throat. He sipped from his water bottle to stall and settled for a casual shrug. Personal questions weren’t entirely unusual, but they were usually followed up with an attempt at setting him up with someone’s granddaughter (or once, someone’s daughter), and Sonny wasn’t interested.  “Someday. If I find the right person.” 

“You’re not going to find her in here,” Catalina stage-whispered. “Unless you like older women?”

Sonny laughed, “you’re half right. But I won’t be finding her anywhere.” He glanced at his watch, missing the scheming grin on Catalina’s face.  He pulled a couple chocolate chip cookies from his bag. “My lunch break is almost over. You want to help me eat these?”

“No. Eat them both. You’re too skinny.”

Sonny laughed. “Now you sound like my nonna!”

Catalina stood slowly and put her hand on Sonny’s forearm. “Well, she’s right. Just keep in mind, us nonnas know what we’re doing.” She gave his arm a pat and Sonny watched as she slowly made her way back inside.

***

“Abuelita! Como esta?” Rafael wrapped Catalina in a hug and kissed her cheek. “Hola Mami.” He held up a small bunch of yellow and orange flowers and Catalina beamed.

“They’re beautiful, Rafi.” He pulled a vase from the cupboard and helped clip the ends of the stems while Catalina filled the vase with water.

“Rafael, come sit. I’m going to make coffee and I was just telling your mother abou-”

“No, I can’t stay long. I have meetings this afternoon.”

“You work too much, Rafi. You need to relax, have a little fun once in a while. Speaking of fun, you should meet-”

“I have fun!” Rafael insisted. “And I relax.”

“But Rafael, I have someone I need you to meet.”

Rafael chuckled, “I just had a few minutes, and I thought I’d stop by. I can meet your friends next time, okay?” Catalina shot Lucia a look, and Lucia shook her head, clearly not wanting to get involved in whatever her mother had planned.

“You’ll let me introduce you to Sonny then?”

“Si. I’ll come back later this weekend,” Rafael promised. “I’ll even bring you dinner. Just tell me when.”

Catalina exchanged another glance with Lucia. “Friday night, in the courtyard. Is eight-thirty late enough?”

Rafael sighed. “Yes. I’ll see you then.”

***

Knock knock

“Good morning, Mrs. Diaz.” Sonny popped his head into her room.

“Oh, Sonny! Come in, come in! You remember my daughter, Lucia, right?”

“I do. Good morning.  Mrs. Diaz, I can’t stay today, I’m not working in this wing. I just stopped by for my word of the day.”

“Oh right. Let’s see.  Abogado.”

“Abogado? What does that mean?”

“Lawyer.”

“Ah.” Sonny looked thoughtful. “I’m sensing a theme with the words this week.  Is your grandson a lawyer, by chance?”

“Si, y muy guapo.”

Lucia’s eyes widened as she realized what Catalina was up to.  “Mother! You leave him alone!” she hissed, turning towards Sonny. “I’m sorry, please don’t listen to her.”

Sonny chuckled. “It’s okay. And I will google that one. You ladies have a good afternoon.”

“Oh, Sonny. Are you working this Friday?”

“I always do.” Sonny called over his shoulder.

***

Sonny settled in at his usual picnic table. He scanned the courtyard before pulling out his phone. When he looked up a few minutes later, there was a slightly older man, in a very expensive suit, standing nearby. He had a plastic bag in his hands, take-out Sonny assumed, and he appeared to be looking for someone.

“Can I help you?” Sonny called out.

“Um, maybe? I’m supposed to be meeting my grandmother for dinner.”

“Dinner is in the dining room between four and six-thirty,” Sonny replied.

“Oh. She said she eats out here on Fridays. At eight-thirty?”

“No. Just me.”

“What?”

“I take my lunch break out here-alone-from eight-fifteen to nine. Every Tuesday through Saturday.”

The man rolled his eyes. “Great. Now she’s...confused?”

Sonny cocked his head to the side, “Wait. I know that eye-roll.” He looked around and then up, catching Catalina staring down at them from her window.  “We’ve been set up. She’s watching us.” He gestured for the other man to sit, and he did, joining Sonny at the wooden table.

“Set up?”

“Tricked. Hoodwinked. Bamboozled.”

He blinked as the realization set in. “Oh, Dios mio.”

“I’m guessing you’re Rafael. The, what was it? The abogado guapo I’ve been hearing so much about lately.”

“Fuck me,” he muttered. “You must be the blue-eyed rayo de sol she mentioned on the phone the other day. I’m sorry, I don’t remember if she mentioned your name.”

“It’s Sonny.” Rafael blinked again, and Sonny felt the need to clarify, “I mean, it’s Dominick, but no one calls me that.”

“No, it’s just. She literally described you as a ray of sunshine.”

Sonny grinned, his dimples on full display. “I try.”

Rafael sighed, “Well, I am sorry she let me bother you. I will go tell her to keep her nose out of your business.”

“You don’t have to do that. I think it’s kind of sweet, actually.”

“Embarrassing. Embarrassing is the word you’re looking for.”

“She just wants you to-” he stopped short. “Look, I’m the only grandson, so my nonna adores me... But she still tries to set me up with every single woman on Staten Island, you know? At least yours cares enough to get it right. I mean, she hasn’t been wrong about anything yet.”

“Don’t tell her that.” Rafael thought for a moment. “Well, I guess if I’m not eating with my abuelita and she did go through all the trouble of introducing us... will you at least have dinner with me?”

“Um, yeah. I would like that. Thank you.” He watched as Rafael unpacked the food, handing him a small box. “I was beginning to wonder if you actually existed.” Sonny admitted. “I mean, you were sounding too good to be true. And then she kept insisting that I had just missed you.”

“Too good to be true, huh?” Sonny shrugged and laughed. “Well, you already know what my grandmother thinks about me. Tell me about yourself?”

Sonny talked as they ate and occasionally Rafael interjected with an anecdote of his own. Sonny was loud, he talked with his hands, and he laughed at his own jokes, and yet Rafael was intrigued. He was surprised to find himself actually enjoying the company of the younger man, and hoped Sonny felt the same.

“Oh... hey, I have to get back to work. But, um, this was nice.”

“Is she still watching us?” Rafael asked. Sonny glanced up and then nodded. “Then I guess I should be on my best behavior. But would you like to go on a proper date with me sometime?”

“Yes,” Sonny stood and gave Rafael his phone number. “Maybe you can come over and I’ll cook something, sometime?”

“Sure. I’ll call you. It was nice meeting you, Sonny.”

“Yeah, you too. Have a good night, Rafael.” Sonny turned and as he made his way back into the building, he caught sight of Catalina’s triumphant grin.

tags: @flufftober2021 @beardsanddetectives @itsjustmyfantasyroom @moderateshouting

[honey-dewey]

Little Leather Boots

Pairing: Shane ‘Dio’ Morrissey/Reader

Words: 4,442

Warnings: Reader is pregnant and is very worried about it, mentions of abortion but it doesn’t happen, lots of tears, a very worried and loving Dio, mention of c-section, I think that’s it folks. 

Permanent Taglist: @phoenixhalliwell

After one too many wild nights with your goth boyfriend, you somehow wind up pregnant, which you didn’t even think was possible considering that you and Dio always used protection. But here you are, pregnant and terrified that Dio ‘I hate kids’ Morrissey will be pissed. No matter what happens, it’s going to be a very long nine months. 

You woke up to an empty bed, as was the unfortunate usual. Your body ached in all the right places as you slid into Dio’s shirt from last night and your own pyjama bottoms. The apartment was cold, too cold as you headed to the bathroom, yawning widely. 

It was only when you opened the bathroom door that the nausea hit you like a truck. You immediately felt your knees go weak, gagging and dry heaving over the sink. When you resurfaced, you rinsed your mouth out and met your own teary eyes in the mirror. Wiping away the evidence, you picked up your phone, trailing slowly to the kitchen. Grabbing a water bottle from the fridge, you called into work, taking the day off. 

The next thing you did was text Dio. He was, understandably, worried. You told him you felt better, and that it was probably just a stomach bug or something. Nothing to worry about, nothing to come home early for. 

Truthfully, you were feeling better. Too better. Settling on the couch, you googled problems where nausea was a symptom. Not much came up that was possible. A stomach bug, but nausea was your only symptom. Same went for the flu and all the other illnesses. And then, right at the end of the list, was pregnancy. 

You scoffed it off, tossing your phone down. As much as Dio complained in the first few weeks, he always used a condom. Always. You’d asked him once if he ever wanted kids, and his response had been a steady fuck no. 

But then you began to think about it harder. You’d always had irregular and unpredictable periods, so the fact that you hadn’t had one in a while wasn’t super suspicious, and your weight had fluctuated, but that was because Dio insisted on a cherry pie last week. No, you couldn’t be pregnant. 

“But what if,” you whispered out loud, looking at the wall and sinking into thought. “It would explain a lot.” 

Deciding to prove to yourself that you were absolutely not pregnant, you stood and put on a decent pair of pants, scooping up your wallet and heading to the CVS. 

The closer the drug store got, the more nervous you became. What if you were pregnant? Would you get rid of the baby? Would Dio dump you if you didn’t want to? Who would take care of you and your baby? 

Shaking your head, you walked into the CVS and took a breath. This would be very easy because you were definitely not pregnant. 

You grabbed a three pack of tests and stood in the self checkout line, hyperaware of the heavily pregnant woman behind you. As you rang up your purchase and dug around in your wallet, you heard her sigh. “I remember when I bought mine.” 

“Pardon?” 

“Sorry!” The woman said sweetly, smiling at you. “I was just remembering when I bought my test for my baby. It’s a magical day.” 

You tried to smile back. “Magical.” 

The woman nodded. “Does your husband know?” 

“I’m not married,” you breathed, staring down at the CVS bag with watering eyes. “He hasn’t, I don’t know if he’ll,” 

“Oh sweetie,” the woman said, coming closer and putting an arm around you. “I'm so sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.” 

You shook your head, wiping away tears. “It’s not your fault,” you said softly. “You didn’t know.” 

The woman sighed, rubbing your arm. “Darling, go home, drink some water, and take the test. I promise, no harm can come from just knowing.” 

Nodding, you took your purchase and waved to the woman. She waved back as you began your short walk to your apartment. 

Taking her advice, you drank water, read over the instructions in the pregnancy test box, and immediately moved everything into the bathroom. 

As soon as you shut the door, you called one of Dio’s friends. Raven was a close confidant of yours and could probably be trusted with this secret. 

“Yo,” Raven said as she picked up. 

“Raven I think I might be pregnant.” 

“I’m sorry, what?” Raven asked. “Did you take a test yet, are you sure?” 

You sat in the bathtub, shaking your head. “Not yet,” you mumbled. “I bought a few.” 

Raven made a noise of sympathy. “Dolly, do you want me over there?” 

“Yes please,” you said, hating how weak you sounded. 

“Be there in five.” 

The apartment was deafeningly silent for five minutes before Raven forewent knocking and just opened your front door. “Dolly, where are you?” 

“Bathroom!” 

Raven’s concerned face appeared in your bathroom door. She took in the likely pitiful sight of you sitting in the bathtub and immediately joined you. “Hon, you’re a hot fucking mess in here.” 

“I know,” you said, head in your hands. “The tests are on the counter. I haven’t taken them yet.” 

“You should,” Raven said, standing and passing you one of the tests. “Worst case scenario, you are knocked up and Dio gets mad, so I kick his ass and take you to my place.” 

You snorted and stood. “Thanks Rav,” you said softly, taking the test. “Now get out of the bathroom.” 

Two agonizing minutes later, you’d washed your hands and taken the tests, not necessarily in that order. Raven knocked, and you opened the door for her. 

“Can I be the Godmother?” She asked, leading you out of the bathroom and away from the tests that need a few minutes. 

“What?” 

“If you are pregnant,” she explained. “Can I be the Godmother?” 

You sighed. “Raven, I’m not even sure I’m going to keep the baby yet if I’m pregnant.” 

Raven dramatically rolled her eyes. “Killjoy,” she groaned, falling into your couch. “Okay, better question. How’re you gonna tell Dio?” 

It was something you hadn’t considered yet. “Uh.” You fidgeted with a pillow, trying to think. “I don’t know. Eventually, I guess he’ll find out when I start looking like I swallowed a planet, but, well, I dunno.” 

A timer dinged in the background, and Raven shot to her feet. “Do you wanna look first or should I?” 

“You do it,” you said, suddenly feeling like your mouth was full of cotton. You watched Raven open the bathroom door, pick up the test, and stare down at it. 

“Hey Doll,” she said, leaning her hip against the bathroom door frame and holding up the test. “Positive. All three of them.” 

Your breath stopped. “Really?” A horrible euphoria spread through your body as you took the test from Raven. Sure enough, it said positive. “Oh my god.” 

Raven left shortly after that, apologizing that she couldn’t stay longer. 

“You call me if Dio flips his shit,” she said, hugging you close. “If he won’t take care of it, I promise I’ll be the best damn auntie in New York.” 

You smiled, waving to her as she went. Sitting on the couch, finally alone, you picked up your phone and dialed a familiar number. 

“Baby?” 

“Hey Mama,” you said, twisting a necklace Dio had gotten you last year. “I have something important to tell you.” 

Your mother gasped. “Are you engaged? Did he finally ask?”

You sighed, smiling to yourself. Despite her original hang ups with your goth boyfriend, she’d come to love Dio like he was one of her own kids, and had been pestering since your four year anniversary to get married. “No Mama, he hasn’t proposed. But I, well, I might need to come spend some time with you. For a while.” 

“Oh darling, what happened?” 

You took a breath, trying to force the words out of your mouth. “I’m pregnant.” 

There was silence on the other end. “Mama?” 

“Baby,” your mother said, voice thick with tears. “Baby are you happy?” 

You began to cry too. “Yes Mama, I think I am.”

Your mother let out a breath. “That’s all I care about. If you’re happy, I’m happy. Oh your father is going to be thrilled! Does Dio know?” 

“Not yet,” you said, nerves returning. “I don’t know when or how I’m gonna tell him, but I’m just terrified he’ll be mad.” 

“Mad that you’re pregnant with his baby?” 

“Mama, he hates kids,” you reminded. “That’s why I might have to come stay with you. Raven offered to help me, but if things go south, I want you.” 

Your mother was quiet for a second. “Of course. Should I tell your father?” 

You smiled. “Please do. I’ll talk to you later, okay?” 

“You call me as soon as you tell him, no matter what. I want to congratulate or yell at him.” 

Laughing, you said goodbye to your mother and hung up, leaving you alone to figure out how you’d break the news to Dio. 

He came home hours later, finding you on the couch watching bad reality TV. “That bad, hm?” 

You groaned. “You have no idea.” You’d cleaned the bathroom and hid the evidence, stashing one pregnancy test in your bedside table and throwing the other two out. 

Dio chuckled, falling onto the couch and kissing you. “How’re you feeling?” 

“Better,” you lied. “Raven came around and kept me company for a bit, and then my mom called because apparently we hadn’t talked in a while.” 

“Did she ask if we were engaged?” 

“What do you think?” You laughed, leaning against Dio’s chest. “Oh! Guess what!” 

“Hm?” 

You pulled out your phone, scrolling through Instagram until you found a specific photo. “My old high school best friend is pregnant!” 

Dio squinted at the photo, and you smiled, handing him his glasses from the coffee table. He was technically supposed to wear them all the time, but he said they ruined his vibe so he never actually wore them. 

“Which one is this?” He asked, adjusting his glasses and looking at you. 

“Bridgit, the cute blonde who accidentally started a fire in the gym.” 

Dio nodded. “She’s huge.” 

You snorted, taking your phone back. “She’s eight months pregnant, Dio. Of course she’s huge. I dunno how I’d handle being that pregnant.” 

“Yeah well,” Dio said, standing. “You’ll never have to.” 

That sent a bolt of fear through you. Resting a hand on your stomach, against the nearly invisible baby you were protecting, you spoke with a certain caution. “You really don’t want kids, do you?” 

“We’ve had this talk,” Dio reminded, sitting back down with a drink in hand. “No, I don’t. I’d be a shit father.” 

“Aw, I think you’d be great at it,” you said, trying to ease your nerves. “Dio Morrissey, holding a tiny little baby, I can see it now.” 

Dio chuckled, nudging you. “Where’s all this coming from? We haven’t talked babies in a year.” 

You shrugged. “I’m not exactly getting younger,” you mumbled. “And when Mama called, she asked me when I was planning on having kids.” 

“Oh,” Dio breathed, putting an arm around you. “What’d you say?” 

“I-“ you faltered, meeting Dio’s deep brown eyes. You hoped, very fleetingly, that your baby would have his eyes. “I told her,” you said slowly, realizing it was now or never. “I told her I was already pregnant, Dio.” 

It was like time stopped. Dio’s eyes went wide, his entire body stilling. “You’re kidding,” he said, so softly you almost didn’t hear. “I don’t, I mean, baby why are you crying?”

You wiped your eyes, chest heaving. “I love you so much, and I don’t want to leave, and I don’t want to get rid of the baby, and I’m scared Dio!” You stumbled over your words, still sobbing. 

Dio shook his head, pulling you close. “I would never make you leave,” he promised. “Not over this.” 

You went still, relaxing in the familiar arms. “You- you’re not mad?” 

“Mad?” Dio pulled away, cradling your face in his hands. “No! I could never be mad at you! It wasn’t your fault and you had no control over any of this.”

Then, you asked the all important question. “Are we going to keep it?” 

Dio took your hands, squeezing them tight. “Do you want to keep it? I won’t make you do anything you don’t want to, okay? Think about yourself, not me. What do you want?” 

You thought about it, finally coming to a conclusion after a minute. “I want to keep it.” 

“Okay then,” Dio said. “I guess we’re having a baby.” 

The rest of the night was a whirlwind. You called your mother, and she and your father congratulated you and made you promise to come visit soon. Raven was also called, swearing violently at Dio until you reassured her that he was okay with the scenario. 

After dinner, you made tea for yourself, standing in the kitchen in Dio’s pyjamas. He came up behind you, spanning his hands across your belly. “I love you.” 

“I love you too,” you said, leaning into his touch. “Your hands are freezing.” 

You two spent the better part of the night like that. You resting and Dio always with a hand on your belly, thumb stroking over the dip of your waist or the divot of your hip bone. 

“You sir,” you said when you finally got into bed and Dio put a protective hand over your waist. “Are obsessed.” 

“I can’t help it,” Dio purred softly, kissing your forehead. “My darling is going to be a mother, and I’m going to be a father. I’m not obsessed. I’m protecting.” 

You smiled. “Same thing.” 

The next month was surprisingly hard. You weren’t really showing, but Dio rubbed your belly anyway. He was surprisingly physically affectionate, and did something that shocked you to your core. 

He quit smoking. 

For almost thirty days, you and him struggled in your own ways, always there to hold the other up as Dio’s hands shook and you dry heaved literally every morning. 

Finally, you had a doctor’s appointment. You’d see your baby for the first time and find out how far you were. As you wiggled into a shirt, you turned in the mirror and gasped. “Dio!” 

Dio came rushing into the bathroom. “What’s wrong?” 

You pressed a hand over your belly. “Look.” 

Coming up behind you, Dio grinned when he saw what you were seeing. A baby bump. An unmistakable baby bump. 

“She’s real,” Dio breathed, and you grinned. 

“What makes you think I’m having a girl?” 

Dio smiled, kissing the back of your neck. “I want a girl.” 

You laughed. “Dio, the sex of our baby is not dependent on your desires.”

“But it should be,” Dio said. “Because I want a girl.” 

“Why?” You asked, tugging on a sweater and covering the bump. 

Dio shrugged. “I had to look after four brothers growing up,” he explained. “I kinda want to take care of a baby girl now.” 

You smiled. “You’re a sap.” 

“I’m your sap,” he corrected, stepping into his boots and zipping them up. “C’mon, we don’t wanna be late.” 

The trip to the doctor was odd. Your doctor was a lovely older man who, while he was a bit blunt, was soft spoken and genuinely seemed to care. 

“And there’s your baby,” he said, turning the screen so you could see. He adjusted the transducer on your belly and you took a big breath, finally seeing your baby. 

“She’s beautiful,” Dio murmured, squeezing your hands. 

“They.” 

“She.” 

“Dio!” You said playfully. “We don’t know the sex yet!” 

The doctor chuckled, moving the transducer a bit. “Looks like everything is developing as expected. You’re about twelve weeks, or three months along, although it’s hard to tell because you’re not sure of the date of conception. But, if you’re at three months now, then your due date should be mid-April. However, if the baby is a week or two early or late, we shouldn’t worry.” 

“And when can we learn the sex?” Dio asked, still holding your hands. 

“We can typically start to see it at about 18 weeks, but we’ll take a look at 22 just to be sure we can see it,” the doctor said, putting the transducer down and wiping your belly off. “We can schedule your next appointment for the sex of the baby now, if you want.”

You and Dio both nodded. “Thank you so much doctor,” you said as you tugged your shirt back over your stomach. 

In the next ten weeks, you and Dio began to get ready for a baby. Your old spare room in the apartment that no longer smelled like cigarettes was cleared out and turned into a beautiful nursery. Despite your insistence that it couldn’t be painted black, Dio still managed to put his touch in it. By the time you were getting ready for your second appointment, the nursery was basically done. 

“I think we did good,” you decided, looking at the nursery as you went to grab Dio so you wouldn’t be late. The walls were a smooth cream color, with the same hardwood as the rest of the apartment covered in a soft black rug. The furniture was all black, with white detailing on the crib’s blankets. Dio had found a gorgeous Edgar Allen Poe blanket that he’d insisted upon, and that was how the classic gothic literature theme came to be. After the blanket came a mobile that had ravens, and then a few picture frames with Dio’s favorite Poe passages. 

“Me too,” Dio said, standing from where he’d been attempting to read a book and coming over to kiss you. “Ready?” 

You nodded. “Absolutely. Mama’s still mad we aren’t having a gender reveal party.” 

“Gender is a construct,” Dio reminded you with a soft smile. “As long as our bean is healthy, I will be happy.” 

Grinning, you made a face as the baby kicked you. “Ow! Tiny motherfucker’s already got your punches,” you grumbled, rubbing a hand over your belly. 

Dio chuckled. “Can’t inherit an ability to throw a punch.” 

“Yeah, well,” you said lowly. “If this kid keeps this up, I won’t have much by way of internal organs when we’re done here.” 

Your second appointment was less stressful than the first. You were out of the danger zone with the risk of miscarriage, and today was all about being happy. 

“Alright,” the doctor said, pressing the transducer to your belly and beginning to move it around. “22-ish weeks, how’re we feeling?” 

“I’m getting six hours of sleep a night and eating almost double what I was last year,” you said, staring up at the ceiling. “I feel terrible.” 

The doctor smiled. “And you, Mr. Morrissey?” 

Dio shrugged. “I’ve gotten used to living with the world’s crankiest pregnant person.” 

“Bitch,” you said under your breath, smiling while you did it. 

“Mhm,” Dio kissed your hand, the warmth of his face a weird contrast to the cold of his lip piercing. “Love you too.” 

The doctor turned the screen towards you. “Alright. Are we ready?” 

You and Dio both nodded. 

“So, there’s the head,” the doctor said, pointing to the screen. “Hands, feet, everything is developing normally, and it looks like you’re having a little girl. Congratulations.” 

You and Dio walked out of that appointment and immediately stopped for ice cream, at your request. You eagerly texted everyone, giving them the news, and Dio handed you a cup of bright pink ice cream. “Congratulations.” 

“Thank you,” you said, taking a bite of the ice cream and sitting on a bench, rubbing your belly. “So, you must be over the moon. You’re getting your little girl.” 

Dio grinned, leaning against your shoulder. “Baby, I have never been happier.” 

Three weeks later, sometime during month 6, you started to feel the euphoria die. You were in pain, and lots of it. Every day, the baby seemed to find new ways to make you suffer. Shifting around and sitting practically on your bladder at one in the morning, giving you hellish cravings that made Dio gag more than once, and for a whole week you had nausea so powerful that you could barely eat. No matter how many times Dio kissed over the now obvious swell of your belly, you felt a creeping horror at the stretch marks you were now sporting. 

“Oh my god!” You hissed, crawling out of bed and swearing violently as you began to make slow laps around the apartment, trying to ease your pain. “Fuck!” 

As you trailed from the kitchen to the bedroom, you felt something warm trickle down your leg. Looking down, a gripping terror took your heart as you realized exactly what had just happened. Three months early, your water had broke. You felt your breath quicken as you did the only rational thing. You screamed for Dio. 

“Shane!” You yelled, the panic forcing his given name out of your mouth. “Fuck! Shane!” 

Dio came skidding out of the bedroom in all his half asleep glory, eyes wide. “What’s wrong?” He said, voice urgent. “Babe? Talk to me!” 

“Water,” you gasped, reaching out to him. “Shit. Water just broke.” 

“What?” Now Dio’s panic met yours, but he was significantly better at keeping a level head. “Okay, not freaking out. We are not freaking out. Look at me. That’s it, there we go.” As he talked, he led you from the puddle of amniotic fluids on the kitchen floor to the bedroom, folding up a towel and guiding you to sit. “I’ll call the doctor, okay? You just relax.” 

Dio scooped his phone up, anxiously dialing the number for the office. 

“Hello? Yes, my partner’s water just broke. Yes, they’re about twenty five week. Of course. Yes. Definitely. Okay, thank you.” 

He hung up, sitting next to you and putting a careful hand on your back. “Babe. C’mon, we’ve got to get to the hospital.” 

You nodded, standing and gripping Dio’s hand as he led you to the car, laying the towel down in the passenger seat and helping you sit. 

“Baby, listen to me,” Dio said softly, taking your hand as soon as he was in the car. “The doctor said you’re probably going to be okay, and so is the baby. 25 weeks is super early, but there’s a high chance you’ll both be okay.” 

“Okay,” you said, placing your hands over your belly. “It seems she’s also inherited your dramatic flair.” 

Dio chuckled. “Close your eyes. We’ll be there before you know it.” 

Despite the late hour, the hospital was alive with activity. A kind nurse led you to the delivery wing, gave you a hospital gown, and promised to get the doctor. 

He was in the room within minutes, checking your dilation and sighing. “So,” he said, standing. “We’ve got options here. Option one, a natural birth. Technically possible, but risky. Option two, c-section. Less risky, but it leaves a scar and you’d need more recovery time.”

It wasn’t a hard choice for you. “Whatever’s safest for the baby.” 

The doctor nodded. “Okay. C-section it is. Mr. Morrissey, if I could ask you to leave the room.”

“What?” 

“With the baby being this early, we don’t want anything to complicate the procedure,” the doctor explained. “Please, I promise we’ll get you if anything major happens.” 

“Wait!” You shouted, gripping Dio’s hand. “He can’t stay?” 

“I’m sorry,” the doctor said. “But no.” 

Dio’s hands were shaking as you kissed them. “Darling, I’ll be fine,” you promised. “Dio, hon, look at me. Just go wait outside. I’ll yell if I need anything.” 

Dio turned to the doctor after kissing you and rasping out a soft farewell. “You come get me if anything goes wrong,” he said softly, so you wouldn’t hear. “And if you have to choose between one or the other,” he glanced at you, knowing you’d actively disagree with what he was about to say. “You save my partner, okay?” 

The doctor nodded. “Of course,” he said. “You can wait right there. This won’t take long, I promise.” 

Apparently, the doctor was a big fat liar. Almost an hour later, Dio was leaning against your mother’s shoulder, half asleep. It had taken so long that they’d had time to show up, which wasn’t helping Dio’s building anxiety. 

Finally, finally, a nurse opened the door. “Morrissey?” 

Dio jumped to his feet, despite almost falling asleep mere minutes before. “Yes?” 

“The procedure was a success,” the nurse explained. “Both your partner and your daughter are okay. Would you like to see?” 

Dio’s heart pounded as he entered the room. You looked completely exhausted, pale and sweaty but alive. You smiled upon seeing him, weakly gripping his hand. “Told you,” you mumbled. 

He grinned, but his attention was soon grabbed by the tiny baby in the room. She was connected to more wires and tubes than you were, but Dio didn’t care. He put a hand against the glass of the chamber she was in, tears starting to flow. “She’s perfect.” 

“She is,” you agreed, looking at your baby. “Is my mama here?” 

Dio nodded, still entranced by the baby. “Welcome to the world,” he said softly. “Athena Morrissey.” 

You and Athena were in the hospital for another month, Dio visiting daily to see you and hold you upright as you saw your little girl. She kept getting stronger, defying every odd and surprising you whenever she could.

It was hard, the first few weeks home. Athena would be in the NICU for a bit longer, until she was healthier, but Dio told you that this was just a chance to truly prepare for the little bundle of joy. 

The day you took her home was a tear jerker. Dio insisted on carrying her through the door, the tiny little thing swaddled in his arms as he gave the dead asleep Athena an apartment tour. 

That night, you smiled, watching Dio away back and forth with Athena in his arms. He’d abandoned his jacket for the comfort of something softer, Athena’s white onesie a contrast against his black shirt. 

“Y’know how, almost ten months ago, I joked that I could totally see you holding a baby,” you said softly, standing and moving to Dio’s side. 

“Yeah?” 

You smiled, stroking a finger down Athena’s cheek. “You look so natural like this,” you said. “You’re gonna be an amazing father.” 

“And you will be an amazing mother,” Dio said, kissing you. “Can you grab something out of my pocket?” 

Nodding, you reached into Dio’s pocket and stopped when your fingers brushed something small and metal. “Dio.” 

“Darling.” 

You pulled a beautiful ring out of his pocket, your emotions getting the better of you. “Are you proposing?” 

Dio grinned. “Figured it was time. Is that a yes?” 

You nodded. “Yes. Dio Morrissey, I cannot wait to marry you.”

[greekbros]

"greek-Bros: When in Rome, wait wut?; The Reboot Nobody Fucking Asked For"

*after two incidences with his sons, Zeus has recruited Hades and Poseidon to investigate why the living hell was so distracting about Rome*

Zeus: *poorly disguised as a shepard* Well, it is a mighty fine city indeed. It's almost comparable to Athens. Don't you think so?

Poseidon: *also poorly disguised as the world's most muscular fisherman* It is dear brother! Why even our statues here are incredibly beautiful!

Hades: *who's cleverly disgusted as an old lady* hmf.

Poseidon: What's the matter Hades? Disgruntled that you don't have a shrine dedicated to you?

Hades: No quite frankly I actually don't care about shrines or temples in my honor. *Looks around and sees the same issues that the Bois saw* .....why do the mortals here call me Pluto?

Zeus and Poseidon: *both laugh at that*

Hades: Hahaha, laugh all you want.

Centurion: YOU TWO! How DARE you laugh at that poor, ugly old crone! You're under arrest for harassing the elderly!

Hades: *grins*

Zeus: *having absolutly none of this BS* .......

Poseidon: Ugh but sir we-

Centurion: *takes out cuffs and chains, FuCkInG puts them on Zeus and Poseidon* You're coming downtown! *Drags the both of them*

Zeus: *glares into space completely understanding why his sons tried to destroy Rome*

Poseidon: But sir! You can't just thrown people in jail for laughing!

Centurion: *in a completely casual tone* I deeply sorry sir but as of late there has been a zero tolerance policy throughout the city, orders say we MUST make an immediate arrest and put you through the identification process.

Hades: *still as an old crone clicks heels and walks away to sight see*

*later*

Mortus: *looming in the dark corner of the interrogation room, walks slowly to the table and slams his fist*.....where were you on the day of the Coliseum's destruction... And if you weren't there where were you on the day of its reopening?

An innocent bean farmer: *shaking in fear* ugh....in my field sir?

Mortus: *glares at the farmer*

A Centurion: *walks in the room* Sir! We have more prisoners! I think you maybe interested in these two.

Mortus: *slowly turns around* ......if this is another dead end.... you're joining the rest of the scum at the crucifixion field.

A Centurion: *gulps* ....y-yes sir.

Mortus: Bring them in...oh and release this one.

Bean Farmer: *just fucking bolts out of the room*

Mortus: .....

Centurion: *brings in Zeus, whom already looks a little claustrophobic in the already small room* There's a second one outside.

*outside*

Poseidon: *apparently has attracted the attention of many young beautiful women* Fear not Roman citizens! For I Po-*thinks of a name*...uhm...Paul.... understands your infatuation, but alas I am happily married, BUT let that not stop you from admiring my very being! *Tries to flex while handcuffed*

The small crowd of women: *swooned*

A Centurion: oh shut up.

*inside*

Mortus: *actually a little intimidated by Zeus and his stone cold resting death face*....Well now....you rather large for a shepard. Retired I suppose?

Zeus: ....no.

Mortus: Than what is your occupation?

Zeus: ......I do not think you have the jurisdiction to ask me.

Mortus: *getting angry* Where were you when the Coliseum was being destroyed!?

Zeus: .... Probably with your mother, who I would be certain would be very ashamed that her son has decided to harass the elderly.

Mortus: *steaming mad* YOU WILL ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Zeus: I want to speak with my lawyer.

Mortus: WHAT?!?

A Centurion: Um sir, we have a Mr-*looks at a crudly written card* Plutonium? He's a law maker and legally represents the detainee.

Mortus: *feeling a cold sweat as if the devil has entered the building, looks at Zeus*

Zeus: *smiling*

Mortus: ....bring him in.

Hades: *now looks more like a mortal version of himself but now carries a satchel* Good evening my name is Cryus Plutonium and I have heard my client and his brother have been unlawfully detained. *Places a scroll on the table* Sir if I may infer, I've been working several weeks in the law office and I have found no evidence of this new "Zero tolerance policy". So I do believe you have no legal right to detain and must release him-

Poseidon: *from outside* AND ME!

Hades: -and his brother.

Mortus: *stares in disbelief* ....what.

Hades: *slowly walks to Zeus and unbinds him*

Zeus: thank you.

Hades: Now. Let us l-*feels a sword near his next* ......

Mortus: *has just about snapped* .....I've been after you and your mutant kin for a whole year and three months.....you owe not just me....but you owe the empire....an explanation.

Hades: ............

Zeus: ...........*lifts a finger, shocks him and tases Mortus, knocking him cold* ................you know something.......I think I finally understand why the children hate this place.

Hades: *shakes his head, as the two leave they see poseidon just flexing for a small crowd while the Centurion who was gaurding him is tied to a support beam*

A Centurion: Please help me.

Zeus: *points and sarcastically smiles* No. *Walks to Poseidon and drags him* It's time to go.

Poseidon: Awww....but I was just getting the crowd warmed up!

Hades: Let's just say they'll be warmed up with a few weeks of heavy thunderstorms.

Poseidon: .....can there be earthqu-

Zeus: You may bury the lot.

Poseidon: *smiles* Huzzah!

Hades: Or....we can be a little less intrusive.

Zeus: Fine, I shall ask Odin if he wants to help.

Hades: Yes my thoughts exactly.

Zeus: *still angry until he sees Octavia and little Caius and suddenly feels a little odd*......Hades.

Hades: yes

Zeus: I understand you don't have children...but what are the chances that one of my sons may have left something behind.

Hades: *trying to understand what Zeus meant until he saw Caius* Hmm....oh come now you're not going to take the child away from. His mother....or..... fornicate with her.....are you?

Zeus: .....oh damn it all....we can't destroy this city........

Poseidon: *in a singsong tone* I can! *Suddenly a little rumble starts until Zeus bonks him on the head* ~°

Zeus: No....the city of Rome...if officially protected.

Hades: ........all this because there's a bastard grandson around here isn't it?

Zeus: Silence Hades. Look at him, not a care in the world. Enjoying his moments with his dear mother talking to Hera a-WHAT THE?!?!

Hades: Wait Hera is here??

Poseidon: *rubbing his head* Hey look! It's Amphitrite too!

Hera: *talking to Octavia* Oh yes, married life is great but have you ever considered divorce?

Octavia: Oh heavens no, even though my husband has been rather distent. I'm positive he isn't in an adulterous relationship. That's punishable but crucifixion here.

Amphitrite: Well yes darling, for the WOMEN, men here get away with it scot-free.

Octavia: Oh heavens no.

Caius: *squirming a little*

Octavia: aww what the matter deary.

Hera: *knotices that Caius has few enough features of Zeus to be related but not directly enough to be his son* Aw what an adorable little baby boy. Who's the father?

Octavia: oh I'm happily married to General Mortus Biccus.

Hera: hmm....

Zeus: Oh there you are my beautiful, wonderful and not here to make sure I'm cheating on her wife! *Grits teeth* what are you doing here?!

Hera: ....I was wondering the same thing. I'm here shopping for some exotic fruits.

Amphitrite: *shows her basket of bananas*

Zeus: Oh.

Poseidon: *enthralled by the bananas* ohhhh.....

Hades: Well....I guess we can all go home then.

Octavia: Oh my! This must be your husband. You must be very lucky to have married such a big strong man.

Hera: *unamused* I am so blessed.

Zeus: *puts his arm around her* not as blessed as I am to be married to her.

Octavia: aww.

Caius: *kinda happy sensing he's found grandma and grandpa* c:

Zeus: *now getting a closer look, the baby literally looks like a spitting image of Hermes* oh my.

Mortus: THERE YOU ARE! *huffing and puffing from running* You are all under arrest!

Octavia: Oh Mortus, don't be so rude to these fine people they have done nothing wrong.

Mortus: This man shot LIGHTNING out of his finger! And that one *points to Hades* is...well he's just scary and THAT one is just annoying! *points to Poseidon*

Poseidon and Amphitrite: *sharing a banana and suddenly stop* hmf?

Mortus: These men are connected to the destruction of the coliseum last year and the disappearance of Gaius!

Zeus: ....Oh! You mean my sons? Oh yes they're actually harmless. You see, they're traveling magicians and they perform fantastic illusions!

Mortus: NO! FUCK YPU OLD MAN! I know what the people saw! Clearly something is going on! ...my suspensions are...that you...and your cohorts.....are demons!

Octavia: Mortus!

Caius: :c

Zeus: ....oh that's rather rude.

Hera: Now hang on a minute. Let's prove our innocence.

Zeus: Hera what are you doing?

Hera: .....you know, the gods are technically innocent....and exempt from being accused of any crime.

Mortus: *tempted to mention Emperor Caligula and his recent campaign against Poseidon but decided not to*

Hera: ...so...if we were gods...we would be innocent.

Octavia: Hmm...she does have a point.

Mortus: What are you getting at?

Zeus: *deep sigh* Fine...I lied.....me...my lovely wife and my brothers....are all gods......I'm actually Zeus, she's Hera and so on and so forth. My sons are were Apollo, Hermes and Dionysus....you see....it's likely their fault for losing their tempers, I apologize for that too. And I apologize for shocking you but you did threaten to crucify me.

Mortus: ..........*starts laughing hysterically and has officially lost his mind*

Octavia: Oh dear. Let's go honey, I must apologize for my husband's behavior. He's been working day and night. Oh sweetheart let's go.

Caius: byebye c: *waves*

Mortus: *while laughing like a mad man* HAHAHAH wait! I HAVE to know this but IS Caius here yours?!? HAHAHAHA I mean, I don't have BALLS! HAHAHAHAHAHA *gets dragged back home*

Zeus: ......you didn't help with that last portion did you?

Hera: No. I figured a man who looked as pathetic and desperate like that probably was already at his wit's end.... Speaking of which is that child yours?

Zeus: hmm....

*back at Olypmus*

Zeus: *pulls the ears of Hermes and Dionysus*

Hera: *helping with the situation and pulls Apollo's and Ares's ear*

Zeus: You boys are forbidden from returning to Rome. And as for you Hermes....it's one thing frolicking with farm maidens with incompetent husbands....but a war general with no testicles?....shame on you.

Hermes: *knows what he's talking about*.....worth it. *Feeling his ear getting pulled* ow~°

[oddlovergirl]

Giorno Giovanna Headcanons

Alright, here’s my headcanons on our Part 5 JoJo and golden boy, Giorno “GioGio” Giovanna ^_^

WARNING: There ARE spoilers and some examples of child neglect and abuse are mentioned. Please proceed with caution if you haven’t got very far into the series that is JoJo and/or have suffered from child neglect and abuse in the past.

-          Since Giorno was still a three-year-old toddler at the time when all members of the Joestar family awakened their Stands thanks to DIO, he was afflicted with the same curse that struck Holly and Josuke. The fact that his own mom was apathetic to his ordeal made it much worse.

-           A year before his mother married his stepfather, Giorno first discovered the picture of DIO that had fallen from his mom’s nightstand while playing a game of hide n’ seek (which is just his mother’s excuse to not play with her child). Though he had no idea who the guy in the picture is, it brought the kid much-needed comfort as that man in the photo has the same star-shaped birthmark as Giorno and started clinging onto the faint glimmer of hope of the guy being a much better person and parent, which is the reason he’s carrying the photo in his wallet (to think that meeting his biological father in person in Eyes of Heaven, both in Story Mode and Free Battle Mode, and seeing what he is truly like is a rather big let-down to Giorno).

-           I speculated that Giorno might be the mobster’s maternal nephew (y’know, the Mafioso whose lived was saved by Giorno and decided to help the boy with his crapsack childhood?). I don’t know why I think it might be the case, but I think the mobster might be related to Giorno as his maternal uncle, having lived in Italy with his divorced father before circumstances force him to become a Mafioso, with the man being against drugs due to the fact he used to live in Japan where there is a much firmer stance on drugs to the point that even the Yakuza viewed drug dealers as the lowest of the low. The mobster (who shall I name him Akimitsu, meaning “bright light” in Japanese to reference the fact that he was Giorno’s light in the boy’s dark past) was not aware that his sister (who shall I name Haruka) had moved to Italy with her husband (who shall I name Brutus) and son at first, but when he found out from an informant while recovering, Akimitsu decides to drop by to beat the stepdad to a pulp and give his sister a well-deserved stern talking-to, just before threatening Brutus that he will end him if he hits Giorno again.

-           After Brutus made the mistake of blaming his stepson and beating him to a pulp for being the reason the mobster forced him to stop abusing him, Akimitsu made good on his promise to end him, and because of this, the mobster decided to drop Giorno off at a Catholic orphanage where he would be well-cared for.

-           While Giorno IS the son of two British men (or more accurately speaking, one British man’s bodiless head attached to another British man with no head who had descended from a proud lineage of Highlander Warriors) and one Japanese woman, I do think that the awful, drunken shite-bag Dario Brando is an Italian immigrant since both “Dario” and “Brando” are both legitimately Italian, which makes Dio half-Italian, so I guess that technically makes Giorno quarter-Italian unbeknownst to himself and others.

-           When one of his hairs first turned from black to blonde, Giorno was reasonably confused. Is he dreaming or is this actually happening? Unaware of his father’s bloodline, he thought it was the result of severe stress. But remembering the photo of DIO, maybe this is hereditary? As the rest of hair started turning blonde, Giorno thought this is normal, but upon seeing his Stand for the first time and seeing what it can do so far, Giorno started to realize the cause for his hair turning blonde may be supernatural.

-           Even though the Mafioso he saved managed to put an end to the bullying the boy endured, Giorno is still lonely since his classmates are now terrified to be even near him out of fear of provoking his Mafioso protector into retaliating. Even at his boarding high school, his classmates are more like acquaintances to him since he’s busy building his criminal credentials to join Passione. This makes Team Bucciarati, starting first with Bruno Bucciarati and Guido Mista, his first real friends in a very long time.

-           When Team Bucciarati is given the escort mission of delivering Trish to the Boss, Giorno forged a letter to his boarding school that he had to deal with a family emergency. Since Giorno became the Don of Passione at the end of Part 5, I think he had forged a letter to his boarding school that he’ll be transferring out to a different school.

-           After Giorno became the Don of Passione, he had a chance encounter with his childhood hero (and uncle) Akimitsu, who ended up becoming one of the few people to know that Giorno is really Diavolo’s replacement. To be frank, Akimitsu was stunned to find out that the boy he helped had become a Mafioso but is nonetheless proud to know that Giorno ended the drug trade. Throughout the whole thing, Giorno is stoic on the outside but on the inside he’s like an excited fanboy exuberant to see his idol again after so long.

-           Giorno may be a serious and collected individual, but he’s still a fifteen-year-old boy at heart. He may think he can handle whatever life throws at him, but there is only so much he can realistically handle before he cracks. On a lighter note, Giorno couldn’t help but snicker at some of the inappropriate jokes usually told by Mista.

-           When Giorno learned about his biological father DIO from Polnareff, he was understandably horrified to learn that he was born to a monster not unlike Diavolo. He does get the consolation that the body DIO stole and used to sire him belonged to a morally righteous man that is Jonathan Joestar, but even then, Giorno was really worried that the spirit of Jonathan would be disgusted with him just for existing as DIO’s spawn before Polnareff assured Giorno that Jonathan is proud to have him here, especially since Giorno just overthrown the vile Diavolo and change Italy for the better.

-           Regarding the Pucci situation in Stone Ocean, it was stated by Araki that Giorno and co. were on their way to stop him when the universal reset happened. The original Stone Ocean manga ran from 2003-2004, which is seven years before the dubiously-canon Purple Haze Feedback was published in 2011, which had Giorno working alongside the Speedwagon Foundation. This is where things started to get rather iffy in that this would conflict with the main storyline since if being part of the Speedwagon Foundation is truly the case, then Giorno should’ve been alerted about Pucci and easily put a stop to him with Gold Experience Requiem. Putting that into consideration, I believe that there is a possibility that Giorno (who has been told that Pucci worked for his father DIO) arrived to Miami on March 17 (which is a day after Jotaro got his Memory Disc back and recovered) with the intention to defeat Pucci, with Mista assisting him. Unfortunately for Giorno and Mista, Pucci used Whitesnake to incapacitate them both, giving the priest free reign to achieve heaven in DIO’s eyes.

[slade-neko]

Saw this video game tag thing pop up on my dash a few days ago. Wanted to do it.

1. First game you played obsessively? Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, I believe I was 5yo. Still waiting on that FF7 Remake treatment.

2. A game that has influenced you creatively? Writing, drawing, etc. Well if I play a game and like it, then I'll create sims of it. Does that count?

3. Who did you play with as a kid? My brother from the day I was born.

4. Who do you play with now? My brother FROM THE DAY I WAS BORN.

5. Ever use cheat codes? I wasn't lying when I made this post. {link}

6. Ever buy strategy guides? Yes! Mainly to look at the artwork though. (Don't need no guide!)

7. Any games you have multiple copies of? Lots of games, most being Left 4 Dead with 6 copies (3 Xbox 360, 1 PC case, 2 PC digitally.) What can I say, its a GOOD GAME!

8. Rarest/Most expensive game in your collection? Gold cartridge Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time (maybe that's rare?)

9. Most regrettable purchase? I don't regret my purchases, but I have received games I have never played like Cubix (PS2) no clue where that game came from, but I have it somehow. Madagascar (Xbox 360) came with my Xbox 360, never opened it from its case. And Monsters Inc. Scream Arena (Gamecube) or something... it was a gift.

10. Ever go to a midnight game release or stand in line for hours? No, because then I'd have to interact with people.

11. Have you ever made new friends from playing video games? I'm only friends with people BECAUSE of video games, so yes.

12. Ever get picked on for liking games? No, that'd be ridiculous.

13. A game you’ve never played that everyone else has? Probably a lot, I'd say Call of Duty, but I technically played CoD 1, 2, and 4. The campaign mode was alright, but I don't really care for CoD games at ALL.

14. Favorite game music? Koji Kondo and Grant Kirkhope are two BIG ones.

15. If it was a requirement to get a game related tattoo, what would you pick? Triforce is the most basic option, but I'd rather not get a tattoo.

16. Favorite game to play with your friends IRL? Super Smash Bros. Brawl with hacks, but that was over a decade ago.

17. Ever lose a friend over a game? No, that'd be ridiculous.

18. Would you date someone that hates gaming? No, that'd be RIDICULOUS.

19. Favorite handheld console? PSP. 3DS is great, but PSP Monster Hunter has ALL of my portable gaming memories. Like playing in school after End of Grade tests with my friend.

20. Game that you know like the back of your hand? Sims 4 I like to think I know everything about Left 4 Dead. Quite a bit about Monster Hunter, more so of a series though than a specific game.

21. Game that you didn’t like or understand as a kid but love now? I'd say Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic. I loved it as a kid, but had a lot of complex pen & paper RPG mechanics that I never understood. I understand a lot more of it now, but its still complex as all heck. I just know you hit things, they die.

22. Do you wear game related clothing/accessories? That's the only thing I wear.

23. The game that you’ve logged the most hours into? Not sure so I'll list a few. Sims 4, Smash Bros. Brawl, Monster Hunter (its a series though), or Left 4 Dead

24. First Pokemon game? Leaf Green

25. Were you ever an arcade game player? No, don't like paying to play.

26. Ever form any gaming rivalries? No.

27. Game that makes you rage? I don't get mad at games, but I had a custom modded Hard Eight mutation in Left 4 Dead that is absolute bullsh*t!

28. Ever play in a tournament? No, because then I'd have to interact with people.

29. What is your gaming set up? A giant wall of video game consoles spanning from NES to Switch, 4 TVs, but I sit at a desk with a PC.

30. How many consoles do you own? "I own every console that's ever existed." - I Don't Play Games When I Play Games (My STRENTH) original song by Smooth McGroove BUT no seriously I own 32 consoles including handhelds.

31. Does the 3DS and/or Virtual Boy hurt your eyes or give you headaches? Yes. 3DS gave me headaches though I only really played with the 3D feature in Ocarina of Time 3D. I think my eyes broke because I couldn't get my 3D to work very well after.

32. Did you ever play a game based on your favorite show/cartoon/movie/comic? Sure I play games based on a lot of things. Literally any anime game. If I had to pick Dragon Ball Xenoverse is kinda like a dream Dragon Ball game. Oh, Attack on Titan 2 is pretty neat too!

33. Did you ever have any bootleg games or plug-n-play games? Some SEGA plug-n-play thing once. Played it like once and now its lost to time (or my closet.)

34. Do either of your parents play video games? Yes. Mom and Dad played NES Super Mario Bros. My Dad went HARD at that game until he saved the Princess. Then he quit forever.

35. Ever work in a game store? Or do you have a favorite game shop? "Hi. Welcome to Gamestop!"I never want to hear that again, but it was my main store until I went full digital/ online orders.

36. Have you ever shed actual blood, sweat or tears over a game? No, I don't tend to get upset or emotional, but Bill dying in Left 4 Dead made me pretty pissed.

37. Have you played E.T. for the Atari 2600? Do you think that’s the worst game ever, or do you have another nomination? Never played it. I don't really play "bad" games, but maybe Sims 4.

38. A game you’re ashamed to admit that you like? The Sims 4

39. A sequel that you would die for them to make? Dragon's Dogma 2 WHICH I think is actually in development, so I'd have to say Fallout New Vegas 2. C'mon Bethesda you cowards, hand the keys back over to Obsidian so they can make another good Fallout game!

40. What to you think of virtual reality headsets or motion controls? Two part question, two answers. VR Headset to immerse in world, yes. Motion Controls, no.

41. A genre that you just can’t get into? MOBAs and MMOs. I don't like paying to keep playing.

42. Maybe it wasn’t your first game, but what was the game that started you on your path to nerdiness? Nintendo 64 opened me up to what video games could be as a kid. Sad to say my parents' NES didn't really do that for me. And years later Fallout 3 was a big game changer for me too.

43. Ever play games when you really should have been concentrating on something else? Every day of my LIFE.

44. Arcade machine that has consumed the most of your quarters? None. I'd rather emulate.

45. How are you at Mario Kart? Pretty dang good. 3-STARS MARIO KART WII, BABY!

46. Do you like relaxing games like Animal Crossing or Harvest Moon? Yes, both of those. I preferred when Animal Crossing had more character to it. New Horizons looks so pretty, but feels so bland compared to classic AC.

47. Do you like competitive games? No. Not really. Usually amongst friends or if I can get competitive against AI Bots. I love my machine bot friends cause they don't cry like 10 year olds when they lose.

48. How long does it take your to customize your player character? Too long. I've seriously restarted games because I wasn't happy with my character's appearance.

49. In games where you can pick your class, do you always tend to go for the same type of character? Yes, I am always the magic man, my brother is always brute warrior, and my friend is the ranger.

50. If you were a game designer, what masterpiece would you create? I don't really know. Honestly, I'd rather mod already good games to make them better than create something completely new.

51. Have you ever played a game for so long that you forgot to eat or sleep? No, that'd be ridiculous. But I've had a friend fall asleep playing games at my house 3 different times and currently dozes off during our Minecraft sessions. So, maybe that's not a completely ridiculous thing after all.

52. A game that you begged your parents for as a kid? Kirby 64 apparently. My brother tells me we had to count out pennies to buy it. I must've been too young with no recollection, but I believe it.

53. What’s your opinion on DLC these days? It's good if its not in the game's files from the beginning and is actually developed AFTER launch... and pre-order bonuses should be standard DLC a month or two later. Some games have content lost to time because of that pre-order bullsh*t.

54. Do you give in to Steam sales? Of course. If you want a game and its on sale then why not? I typically wait just for Steam sales to get games.

55. Did you ever make someone you hated in the Sims and did mean stuff to them? No? I typically make people and characters I like in Sims. I've made villains like Dio, but he's an anime villain and I don't really HATE him despite the horrible things he's done.

56. Did you ever play Roller Coaster Tycoon and kill off your guests? No. Never played that game.

57. Did you ever play a game to 100% or get all of the achievements? I try to for all the games I really like.

58. If you can only play 3 games for the rest of your life, which ones do you pick? The Sims 4, Skyrim, & Fallout: New Vegas. Mods make them live forever. Left 4 Dead and Monster Hunter are good choices too.

59. Do you play any cell phone games? Those aren't games.

60. Do you know the Konami Code? No? But I'll take a guess. Is it make an IP and forget it exists?

61. Do you trade in your games or keep them forever? Keep forever... even the bad ones.

62. Ever buy a console specifically to play one game? PS4 Pro for Monster Hunter World. It was basically for early access since the PC version was being developed and releasing after PS4, but I don't like waiting.

63. Ever go to a gaming convention or tournament? Sort of. Been to anime cons and walked into the gaming tournament rooms only to walk out less than 10 minutes later.

64. Ever make a TV or monitor purchase based on what would be best for gaming? No, but I'm going to be doing that soon, hopefully.

65. Ever have a Game Genie, Game Shark or Action Replay? Did it ever mess up your game’s save file? GameShark for N64, PS2, Gameboy, and Action Replay for Gamecube, DS, 3DS. And no not really, I would cheat responsibly... but there was this one time at school my friend and I borrowed another friend's Gameboy game, loaded it up with my Gameshark, tried playing, it crashed, loaded it back up, save file corrupted... we just stared at each other jaws dropped, "Here's your game back, dude. Make sure you don't play it til you get back home!"

66. Did you ever have have an old Nokia with Snake on it? No, but I remember seeing them on billboards in the game DRIV3R on PS2.

67. Do you have a happy gaming-related childhood memory you want to share? Every game I play is filled with happy memories (mostly.)

68. Ever save up a ton of tickets in an arcade to get something cool? These tiger plushes. My brother got white and I got orange. They were the coolest. Got a butt load of tickets from some jackpot spinning light game thing as I was good at the timing with repeated jackpot hits.

69. In your opinion, best game ever made? I've played quite a few masterpiece games, but to pick one, I'd say Fallout: New Vegas

70. Very first game you ever beat? Super Mario 64. I was a mere child on a Sunday morning and ate celebratory pancakes made by my Dad.

Wow, that was long... I get the feeling this was supposed to be a "send me ask with numbers" thing, but answering all at once is more fun.

[jjadegreen]

ITS SPOOKY SEASON BABY !!!

And that means making spooky aus for no reason other than fun<3

In summary- jjba part 1-6 but there’s no stands/Hamon and they all exist at the same time AND everyone is a spooky monster!!! I included as many characters as I could but it’s quite easy to run out of creatures, so bear with me on a few of them. Also the joestar bloodline is just gonna all be George Joestars kids because I said so!

Also, this is all really dumb but it’s just for fun so it’s ok💕

*minor TW for mentions of death!!! Nothing graphic but I’d rather be safe

Jonathan: Frankenstein

Not exactly like the traditional Frankenstein’s monster but whatever!!

Used to be a regular kid until he died in his 20s along with Erina :(

His father, who is still alive here, doctors the hell out of his dead son and boom. Franken-son.

Most body parts are his but he lost some in his death... so like, one of his legs is just some random guys.

He is still very Jonathan... a sweet boy... beloved.

He loves flowers and plants and such!

Married to Erina!!!

Joseph: werewolf

Tbh I just feel like werewolves give off himbo energy

Ran into some spooky woods next to the Joestar mansion as a kid and came home with a wolf bite and a cool new form

The exact same as regular Joseph but with more dog attributes

Our boy will chew on a bone if he finds one. He will chase tennis balls like his life depends on it.

Him and Caesar are rivals but the kind of rivals who fight on the weekdays and watch shitty romcoms together on weekends

Jotaro: merman

Ocean man....... take me by the hand...... lead me to the land.......

Ok but in all seriousness. You know why Jotaro is a merman. Silly little ocean man.

Edgy bastard but he will go entirely soft if you bring out a sea creature

I have 0 idea how he became this. He probably pissed off an ocean witch or something and she made him a merman

H20: just add water type transformation. If he touches water, BOOM now he has a tail

He does not let that stop him

Kakyoin is his best buddy!! He also hangs out w/ Polneraff and Avdol

Jolyne: witch

Jolyne is just a lesbian witch. Is that too much to want

Idk anything about witches so I dunno!!! Maybe she just like. Decided to be a witch. I think there are real witches and I don’t want to disrespect anyone

Although she is the Halloween-y, pointy hat, black robe witch. She makes potions and stuff.

She has diverted her potion experience into cooking

She makes THE BEST fucking pastries

Josuke: werewolf (like father like son)

Even tho Joseph is not his dad here they give off similar energies

Joseph bit him while they were arguing and boom boom werewolf

In a band!!! With oku, koichi and yukako!!

Rohan is their manager

Best friends with Okuyasu and Koichi

He will cry if he doesn’t eat for 4 hours

Giorno: vampire

Vampire for obvious reasons

He’s technically everyone’s nephew because he’s DIOs son (who is biologically a joestar here)

He’s not in the mafia! He just hangs out with the bucci gang!

Despite having the ability to make it seem like he knows what’s going on, he never does

Never

Pudding cups are banned from the mansion because he will devour them in just a few seconds

Vegan, but will never pass up drinking the blood from someone he hates

You guys know I’d never stop at just the jojos

Erina: Frankensteins bride!

Died with Jonathan and was brought back the same way as him

Baker!!!

Very close with Speedwagon

Speedwagon: former ghost hunter

Our man was a ghost hunter until actually meeting a ghost (probably Reimi) and deciding that maybe he could just be a normal man instead

He lives with the joestars because he’s really close with Jonathan and Erina

He and Will were a ghost/vampire hunting duo

Will Zeppeli: former vampire hunter (who is now a vampire lol)

Once Speedwagon decided to just be friends with all the monsters he followed

Caesar: vampire

Don’t ask why caesar is a vampire even though that’s DIOs thing. Caesar gives off vampire energy.

He acts like he hates Joseph but believe me they are in love

Him and Suzie Q are the most powerful friendship you could imagine

Suzie Q: fairy!

Just a little fairy girl! That is it!

Badass bitch. Probably uses her tiny size to steal from everyone

Smokey: literally a normal dude

Caesar was going to suck his blood but decided that Smokey was too nice for that date

The joestars of course got attached to him immediately

Kakyoin: Tree Nymph

TREE MAN!!! TREE MAN!!!

His hair noodle is a branch that grows a cherry

Iggy: Cerberus type dog

Jotaros pet dog!!!

Absolute bastard

Avdol: Phoenix

Fire bird. Self explanatory.

Polnareff: centaur

Yes he still has the stupid hair. Would he be polnareff without it?

Avdol simp

Koichi: shapeshifter

He’s a shapeshifter because I said so even tho it makes no sense!!!

He does so many favours for everyone

In a band w/ oku, Josuke + yukako

Okuyasu: zombie

Why a zombie? Because Okuyasu has no brain

He’s a simple man. You put food in front of him and he eats it on sight

In a band w/ koichi, Josuke + yukako

Yukako: siren

I just feel like a long haired pretty woman gives off siren vibes

In a band!!! You have heard it three times you know the drill

Rohan: can transform into a dragon??? I guess???

I’m gonna be honest I’m just running out of ideas

Band manager

Tonio: can transform into a caladrius

@c-c-cherry told me this is some kinda healing bird??? I’m choosing to trust her don’t betray me Cherry

Reimi: ghost, obviously

No notes needed you get it. She’s a ghost

Mista: gargoyle

Stinky man!!! Stinky stone man!!! Never showers because he’s a stone man!!!

Bruno: angel<3

He’s already a perfect angel in the show why would I need to change that!!

Bruabba is canon He is married to Abbacchio

Abbacchio: demon

Goth demon man to contrast Bruno’s infinite light

He is married to Bruno because bruabba is real

Narancia: ghost

I’m literally just imagining narancia pulling so many stupid pranks as a ghost which is the whole reason I chose this for him

Fugo: reaper

Imagine like. Edgy son of the grim reaper who doesn’t want to be a reaper so he runs off and becomes friends with a wacky group of creatures. That’s fugo baby!

Trish: imp

Im almost out of ideas

Probably half human? Diavolo would definitely be an imp as well

——————————————————————————

This was very bad but fun

Thank u Cherry for being my emotional support while I tried to come up with so many different monsters

Also yes!! Some of them aren’t exactly monsters but I am just a little creature who doesn’t want to spent a week looking for the perfect monsters for every character

Love you all mwah mwah

[duhragonball]

BEGIN: Battle Tendency Liveblog.   JJBA Ch. 45-47

🇺🇸🗽🧗‍♂️🧼🪀🌵Part 2, Hell Yeah!🌪️🎈🛩️🌋🚬

I'm pretty friggin' excited for Part 6 anime, and Part 6 is one of my faves, so one could understandably assume that Part 6 is my favorite.  And I post a lot of other JoJo stuff on this blog, so it's probably not obvious, but Part 2 is the best.   

I got into JoJo in 2017, watching Parts 1-4 in anime version, then reading the scanlations of Parts 5-8 while I waited for the anime to catch up.    Then I re-liveblogged the Part 5 manga because there was finally a proper translation available.   And technically the Part 8 liveblog never ended, since the manga is still ongoing.  

As I developed an appreciation for the manga, I started to feel like I should go back and check out the comic versions of Parts 1 through 4.  Where better to start than my personal favorite?   But I never got around to it, until now.

There's a few things I want to explore with Part 2.    First, I want to go through and work out why exactly I like it so much.   It's kind of tough to articulate, but usually I just say that it's fast-paced and something's always happening.   Part 1 takes a while to get going, and Parts 3-8 rely on the Stand concept, which means that each of them occasionally fall into the trap of becoming formulaic.   Part 2 doesn't have the hassle of introducing all the lore, and it doesn't have the luxury of just doing a gauntlet of Stand Battles to pad out the story.   But I think there's more to it than that.  Battle Tendency has a charm all it's own, and that's what I want to talk about.

Second, now that I've become familiar with Parts 1-7 (and most of 8), I want to go back and see how 2 holds up as part of this mythos.   BT sort of gets overlooked, I think, and that's fair, since it doesn't involve Dio, Stands, or the more outlandish costumes of the later installments.  A lot of fans write off Parts 1 and 2 for being "boring", but at least Phantom Blood carries the prestige of starting it all, and providing the origin of Dio.  Something I think a lot about is whether or not Part 2 "connects" with the later entries in the JoJo series.  It forms a trilogy with 1 and 3, and Part 4 features Joseph's legacy in an important way, but what about the later ones?   Parts 5 through 8 owe a huge debt to Stardust Crusaders for introducing Stands, and to Phantom Blood for introducing JoJo's, but what does Part 2 give them, if anything?   

Third, I'm interested in seeing how BT holds up in isolation.    It's a direct sequel to Part 1, and it ends with a prelude to Part 3, so it's clearly designed to function as part of a larger saga.   But Parts 4 and 5 really don't operate that way, and that got me thinking that maybe Part 2 is more self-contained than I give it credit for.  

But enough about that, let's get this started.

There's two plot threads in these opening chapters.  One reintroduces Robert E. O. Speedwagon, now a 70 year old oil tycoon, and Straizo, who has succeeded the late Tonpetti as the Ripple Master.   Speedwagon has been using his oil fortune to fund a research organization called the Speedwagon Foundation, and it discovered something major during an archaeological expedition: an engraving of the stone mask, the same one Dio used to turn himself into a vampire 50 years earlier.   Note that the mummified corpse lying on the slab with the engraving has vampire fangs.   Whoever this guy is, he didn't just know about the masks, he used one personally.

It might get revealed later in the comics, but I'm pretty sure the anime version had Speedwagon explain that he primary purpose of his foundation was to learn more about phenomena like the Stone Mask, which is probably why they were digging up an Aztec temple in Mexico to begin with.   As I recall, the Stone Mask was discovered in that part of the world, and taken back to Europe, where it eventually came into the possession of the Joestar family.   Speedwagon would know this tale, and so if he wanted to find out more about the mask, he would have known where to start.   Fifty years later, he seems to have hit paydirt.

But the mask engraving isn't why he called Straizo all the way in from Tibet.   Deeper in the temple, there's a weird looking area that looks like something from out of an H.R. Giger painting.   In the center stands this column, or pillar, if you will, and mounted on the pillar is...

...This guy, surrounded by more stone masks.   When I first watched this part of the anime, I though the big reveal here was that there were lots and lots of Stone Masks, which would be a big problem, since Part 1 made a big deal out of destroying the one Stone Mask that started all the trouble.   And maybe the guy in the pillar was the one who invented the things, I thought, but the bigger problem is that he made so many of them.   But no, Speedwagon explains that the "Pillar Man" is not an image carved into the stone, but a living being, in some form of suspended animation.  He even has a pulse.   

So who is this guy and why did he create the Stone Masks?   Speedwagon does not care.   He only wants this Pillar Man destroyed before he wakes up, and that's the sole reason he called in Straizo.   The two of them were the only survivors of the battle with Dio 50 years ago, and Straizo's Hamon power, also known as the Ripple, can destroy vampires that were created by the Stone Mask.    So he's desperately hoping Straizo can finish off the Pillar Man the same way.   But Straizo doesn't seem as concerned about it, and he asks about Joseph Joestar instead.    So I guess I ought to circle back to the other plotline... 

Fifty years after Jonathan Joestar sacrificed himself to defeat Dio Brando, his wife Erina and his grandson Joseph have moved to New York City.   Joseph tries to buy a Coke, but this kid swipes his wallet.   Kind of funny how Joesph's first and last appearances in JJBA are him getting robbed. 

But the kid runs afoul of the local corrupt cops, who bludgeon him with their batons and threaten to put him in jail for 20 years unless he agrees to give them a cut of whatever money he makes from pickpocketing.   When Joseph catches up to this scene, the cop even says he's going to keep Joseph's wallet "as evidence".   I gotta say, not everything from Battle Tendency has aged well, but this police brutality stuff has become incredibly relevant.  This could be 2021, except the cop would have had a gun, and he would have shot Smokey, then Joseph because he mistook the Coke bottle for a rocket launcher.  

Joseph tries to defuse the situation by claiming he gave the wallet to the kid as a gift, but the cop doesn't believe that story, and he wouldn't care even if he did.   He even smears boogers in Joseph's face just to prove that he can say and do whatever he pleases.    Up to this point, Joseph looks and seems a lot like Jonathan.  Later artwork tries to downplay that resemblance, probably just so it's easier to tell them apart.   The anime gave Joseph different color hair, and Hirohiko Araki himself started drawing young Joseph with aviator goggles all the time, even though he doesn't wear them that much in this story.  But starting out, the idea was that Joseph is the spitting image of his grandfather, and it almost looks like this is just an clever way to sneak Jonathan back into the story and transport him forward in time, except....

Coming through, coming through, coming through now  

Coming through, coming through, coming through now

Coming through, coming through, coming through 

Shake it like it's heat, Overdrive!

Yeah, so Joseph can do Hamon/Ripple tricks just like his grandfather, and all the others guys who could use Hamon back in Part 1.   The difference is that when Joseph does it, it looks coooooool.  After breaking Officer Hulk Hogan’s trigger finger, Joseph takes a big swig of soda, because it’s awesome.

To Smokey’s surprise, Joseph did all that badass stuff a second ago, but he’s terrified about his grandmother scolding him for it.  So Joseph wants to run for it, and that suits Smokey, so they rush off together, beginning a long tradition of JoJo’s running from things.   Enemies, consequences, you name it. 

Smokey asks Joseph how he learned how to do that trick with the coke bottle, and he says he has no idea, he’s just always been able to do it.    He knows his grandfather had the same power, but he’s dead, and so are his mother and father.  Curiously, Joseph’s father did not have Hamon powers, so it seems to have skipped a generation. 

And that sets up the other side of the plot.   Speedwagon wants Straizo to destroy the Pillar Man immediately, but Straizo first asks about Joseph.   He had heard some time ago that Joseph had innate Hamon abilities, and he had used them once to rescue Speedwagon from a kidnapping attempt in midair.   A flashback shows us this moment, with guys threatening to ransom and kill Speedwagon, but Joseph is just chilling in the back with a Superman comic. 

Okay, time out.   This panel rules and all, but the Superman comic book didn’t start until 1939, a year after Battle Tendency begins.   Superman was featured in the 1938 magazine Action Comics, but this scene on the plane is a flashback to Joseph from his early teens.   Also, the earliest DC bullet logo didn’t appear until 1940, so what is this?  Some kind of magic, time travelling comic book?    I hope someone got fired for this blunder! 

Anyway, Joseph was content to ignore the hijackers until one of them struck him, and even that wouldn’t have upset him except he got his own blood on his clothes, which Erina bought him, so that sends him into a rage.   Speedwagon was worried that Joseph might clobber the hijackers, but instead he knocks out the pilot, then drags him and Speedwagon out of the plane before it crashes.    The main thrust of that story was that Speedwagon was more worried about what Joseph might do than the hijackers who had already threatened to murder him.   Joseph is slow to anger, but once you piss him off he’s going to go to war, and he doesn’t always think things through.

But he’s never been trained to use his powers like Straizo’s order.  Upon hearing this, Straizo kills his own disciples, and all of the Speedwagon Foundation guys, then knocks Speedwagon himself out.   This will anger Joseph when he hears about it, but Straizo is counting on this.    As he explains, Hamon power can slow his aging process down considerably.   He and Speedwagon are both about 70 here, but he looks much younger.   Even so, he’s feeling his age, and he confesses that he always admired Dio for his immortality and power.   So now that there’s Stone Masks available, he’s decided to use one on himself, become a vampire, and become “a being that surpasses all”.  

And that’s a theme that runs through all of Battle Tendency, along with the rest of the JoJo franchise.  The main villains always seek power to position themselves above the rest of humanity.  At first, it seems kind of random for one of the men who opposed Dio to suddenly switch allegiences like this, but in truth, it’s human nature to be tempted by this kind of power.  Dio succumbed to the lure of the Mask, and now we find that Straizo would have done the same.   He just didn’t have the opportunity until now.

But the reason he’s concerned about Joseph is that he’s thinking this through.  Dio was defeated after all, so Straizo wants to eliminate anyone who could potentially defeat him.  Aside from himself and Speedwagon, the only others who know about the battle with Dio and the Stone Mask are Erina and Joseph.   Once he eliminates them, he’ll be free to do as he pleases.

Back to New York, this is a pretty sweet drawing of a car.    I’m not a car guy, but even I can get behind this.  By now, Smokey has met Erina Joestar, and he finds out some of the backstory from Part 1.    Erina’s husband died at sea, and she was pregnant with their son, Joseph’s father, and had a baby girl whom she rescued from the same incident at sea.   The two children grew up, married, had Joseph, and died, the father in World War I, and the mother of some unspecified illness.  Perhaps out of loneliness, Erina is “unflinchingly kind” even to someone like Smokey Brown, who doesn’t seem to think he’s worthy of her favor.

Anyway, Erina wants to take Smokey out to dinner at this nice Italian restaurant, but this racist mafia guy makes a big stink about a Black person being allowed to eat there.    Joseph gets up to kick his ass, but first he has to check with Erina to make sure it’s okay, and she’s like “Yeah, destroy that guy,” because even though she doesn’t approve of Joseph beating up people, she can’t abide disrespect to her friends.   This leads to the memorable fight scene where Joseph is like eight steps ahead of his opponent.  He goes for his brass knuckles, but can’t find them, and Joseph deduces where they are because of some bloodstains on his shirt.  He even suggests what this guy is about to say next because he’s so predictable.

Then he dodges every blow, moving so quickly that this jerk thinks he was hitting Joseph, when in fact he was punching a hat rack behind Joseph, and somehow he didn’t notice that he impaled his hand on broken wood until Joseph explained it to him.     And honestly, this feels like the prototype for a lot of Stand Battles down the line.  I’ll have more to say on that later.

What puts Battle Tendency over the top is how Joseph not only outwits this big lummox, but the rest of the diners at this restaurant all start applauding him for doing it.    They’re just honored to be present in this insane comic book where literally anything can happen.   “He made that asshole punch a hat rack!   This is awesome!”

Then this dude suddenly speaks up.   He’s not only the mafia guy in charge of the first guy, but he’s also heard a hot tip about Speedwagon getting murdered in Mexico by a Tibetan man.   He knew Erina would be interested in hearing this, but he’d never met her before.  Small world, huh?  

How would this guy already know about it, though?  I guess Straizo deliberately leaked the story, specifically so Joseph would find out about it sooner, but it seems awfully convenient.   But that’s how Battle Tendency rolls.   This thing’s only seven volumes long, and we’ve got a lot of ground to cover...

[sunshine-shitposts]

(Takes place a few months into Sunnie's employment at the Foundation. The whole 'roommates with Dio' thing is still relatively new. 😌)

Experiment

～

He was in his shower when he heard her muffled shout from her room.

"HOLY SHIT!!!!"

"Well that's odd," he mused, running his fingers through his wet hair, "She's usually asleep at this time."

He easily caught the sound of her wooden door slamming open with a resounding thud.

"HOLY SHIT DUDE!!!!!"

Dio smiled to himself and turned the water off, stepping out of the shower and wrapping a towel around his waist. "It's not quite 'eureka', but it seems she has had an idea."

When he left his room, he heard furious grumbling and shuffling from the kitchen, so he followed the noises to see Sunnie, in her usual giant NASA shirt and cotton shorts sleep ensemble, rushing around the tiled floor and quickly looking into the recycling, pulling out a couple of empty Izze cans.

"Oho? What has you up so late at night?" Dio asked.

"Okay, so I had an idea? I guess? In my dream?? Well whatever it was, I woke up with an idea!" She was speaking quickly, not even really paying attention to Dio. "You know what wind is, right??"

He leaned against the doorway, smirking. "I'm familiar with the concept," he said, "but the specifics are something I've never looked into."

She continued to move around the kitchen, not sparing a glance at her roommate. "Okay. So, air is the word we use to refer to atmospheric gases surrounding our pale blue dot, kept in place by gravity, right?" She hopped up on the counter, opening various cupboards frantically, "Naturally, wind occurs because of—where the fuck is the flour—because of horizontal and vertical differences in atmospheric pressure, and I have a leetle theory that that might be what I can manipulate, through Windy." Sunnie looked behind some pots before closing that cabinet door with a thud as well. "Of course, that's just naturally. There's also mechanical reasons for wind moving; fans, turbines, even walking through a room, yadda yadda right? But I'm focused on the regular way, yeah? High pressure to low pressure and all."

"I understand," he hummed. Watching her tiredly yet animatedly rifle through their things was amusing, but he took pity on her and walked over to the pantry, pulling the flour off of the shelf as she hopped back off the counter with single-minded focus. "You were looking for this, dear?"

"Oh, you got the flou–" she turned around and nearly fell to the floor, finally noticing his glistening wet skin and the towel wrapped low around his waist. "FUCK. JESUS CHRIST DUDE, PUT ON SOME CLOTHES!!"

His smirk grew into a full-on grin, "I thought you wanted the flour?" he asked, leaning over her and jiggling the bag in front of her face. She stepped back, cheeks flushing.

"It's–I do, but you're…" Her eyes strayed from his face, tracing down the lines of his body, his abs, to the top of the towel, and immediately looked back up into his eyes, willing herself to not get distracted. "You're one mishap away from straight up nudity, man. Just… uh—"

Reveling in flustering her, he took a step forward, and she stepped back again. "Darling," he purred, backing her against the wall, "your eyes are wandering. I wonder, do you see something you like?"

The air between them was thick for a moment, her eyes darting to his arms, to his chest, to the scar around his neck, before she huffed and shook her head indignantly, laughing to herself. "Oh, no. No no no, I'm not letting this happen!" Sunnie grabbed the bag of flour from his hand and ducked past him. "I refuse to let you kabedon me when you're in nothing but a towel!!"

Dio turned and looked at her as she started to leave the kitchen, his eyebrows knitted in confusion. "Kabedon?"

"Look it up, asshole!!" She snapped, looking at him from the doorway, cheeks dusted with pink, "And if you're curious, I'll be in the living room. Put on some damn clothes."

Upon arriving in their living room, he was surprised to see that Sunnie had expeditiously spread the flour in a light layer across the coffee table, and was delicately placing an empty green Izze can in the center. Her hair, up in a bun, was a mess, and her eyes were wide, focused, and slightly manic.

"This is not quite what I was expecting," Dio hummed, an eyebrow quirked.

"Well what were you expecting?" She grunted, lining the other three empty cans up neatly along on the edge of the table.

He shrugged. "I suppose I don't have an answer to that."

"Well there you go," she replied, finally happy with her setup, looking up at Dio as he walked over to sit in one of the wing chairs and her expression dropped into an unamused leer. "Really dude? Just sweatpants? Not even a shirt?"

He gave her a dazzling, shit-eating grin. "What? It's comfortable." She scoffed and rolled her eyes, and he chuckled. "So, my dear, what's…" He whirled his hand in the coffee table's direction, "…all of this?"

"An experiment!!!" She shouted happily, demeanor immediately changing. "I thought up an experiment for me to do!! A test of sorts!! Something to try out!"

Dio raised his eyebrows, regarding her curiously. "Care to elaborate?"

"So how I usually use Windy is, either she or I physically manipulate the air to get it to do what we want. Like…" she thought for a moment, "...Think of it like pulling your finger through water. It leaves a path, you know? And then there's the direction, it feels like a push, or a pull. And that's how I," Windy's wing shimmered on her left wrist and she flicked her hand almost dismissively, knocking her scarf off the console table on the other side of the room, "do that. I feel like the physical aspect of it helps me… connect with the air molecules, make them flow. You following?"

"It sounds very intuitive for you, little bird," he said, "What does this have to do with the empty cans?"

"PRESSURE, dude! Atmospheric pressure!!" she shouted, throwing her hands up in the air, "If that's what I'm able to manipulate, if THAT'S part of my ability, I may be able to remotely crush an empty Izze can!! By exciting or dampening the activity of air molecules, I might be able to do it. And I want to try!!"

Dio grinned widely, thoroughly amused and highly intrigued. "And the flour you've spread on our coffee table?"

"The flour's so I can see the movement of air. It helps me visualize it!!" She said, clenching her fists excitedly, "I used to do this with my best friend after I told her about Windy. Given, that was with dirt or sand or whatever was available at the time, but it's the same concept! She'd set up courses that I'd have to move a line of air through, and I steadily got better at controlling wind that way!!"

Hearing that there was someone besides her immediate family and her husband that knew about her Stand was news to him, but he took it in stride for the moment.

"See? Like this," Sunnie continued, the wings appearing on her wrists again and she swept her hands up and out, and two curling paths began to snake through the flour like filigree. "I've gotten really good at it, to be honest."

"Your control over your Stand is impressive indeed, Sunshine," he agreed, and she smiled wide, a satisfied giggle escaping her.

"Hell yeah. So! Let's begin!!" Sunnie plopped on the sofa and Dust in the Wind popped out behind her, grabbing her shoulders and looking at the can as well. "I'm gonna try to do this without, y'know," she gestured wildly with her hands, "any of that. Just… stare at it and go cronch." She paused, then her eyes positively lit up. "Like Mewtwo!!!"

Dio looked at her oddly. "Like what?"

She gave him a dismissive wave of her hand. "That's Pokémon, I'll introduce you later." Sunnie settled into the sofa, wiggling a bit to get comfortable, then gave him a slightly shy little glance. "You, uh, you don't have to stay and watch. This is just a little personal project of mine and all. You can sleep or whatever."

His smile, this time, was sincere rather than smug. "Oh, I know that, but I don't technically need to sleep, and I'm also terribly curious about where this goes." Dio crossed one leg over the other, leaning back in the chair and propping his elbow up on the arm rest, settling his jaw in his palm. "Watching you approach your Stand's ability with science in mind is utterly fascinating, you know."

He caught a faint pinkish blush on her cheeks, which dissipated as quickly as it rose and she looked back at the can, her Stand tapping her fingers on Sunnie's shoulders excitedly. "Whatever. Now, it's time to get funky."

Thirty eight minutes later, the Izze can was still intact and all Sunnie had to show for it was some eye strain and a very light sheen of sweat on her forehead.

Dio, who had been watching her the entire time, had seen her eyebrows begin to twitch in frustration. He had a feeling she was seconds away from snapping when she suddenly careened herself into the corner of the sectional head-first, whining loudly.

"Bullshit, this is bullshit!!! I can't—I can't feel anything, I can't feel the air, it's… fuck this, dude. Fuck this!!!" Dust in the Wind floated over her user, massaging her fingers on Sunnie's scalp reassuringly.

"You do seem tired, dear, would you like to—"

"BUT THERE HAS TO BE A WAY!!!" she insisted, shooting herself upright once again. "There has to be. I just have to figure it out. Maybe if I…" She looked down at her hands, perplexed, and flexed her fingers. "Yeah, I mean, I can feel the air now, but I wanna try without moving my hands."

Dio grinned as she continued mumbling to herself. His little human certainly was stubborn. "So, how exactly are you envisioning doing this?"

"Well, I supposedly should be able to do it two ways off the top of my head," she replied, pulling her legs up onto the sofa, resting her elbows next to her feet and subsequently almost folding herself in half. "The first is simple brute force. That's the easy one. Pushing the can in on itself from the outside. The second one is more fine-tuned and still a theory. That's the air pressure one." She sat back up, the soles of her feet pressed against each other and tapping impatiently. "So… air molecules, right? They're everywhere, air is basically everywhere. You know the 'glass half full or half empty' thing? It's bullshit because the glass is always full. It might not be full of water, but it is full. Air takes up space. That's why we can blow up balloons, or make bubbles underwater. That balloon is inflated because we put that air in there. We see the bubble in the water because water has to move out of the way because air displaces it. Make sense?"

"It does. I can see why you used to be a STEM teacher," he said, bouncing his foot slightly.

"Alright. So the reason that can," she pointed at the can in the center of the table, still undisturbed by her efforts, "is still the way it is is because the pressure outside the can is the same as the pressure on the inside of the can. If there's an imbalance, it rushes to maintain equilibrium. That's why weather happens. Hot air rises, and the denser cold air swoops in to take its place. Hypothetically, if I can manipulate air molecules, I should be able to cause a pressure imbalance great enough to trigger an implosion." Windy swooped over to the can, hovering above it and inspecting it curiously, and Sunnie heaved a large sigh. "There's some temperature stuff involved, water molecules and all, but again, this is a theory."

"Interesting," Dio hummed, uncrossing his legs slowly and leaning forward, "Well, if using your hands helps you feel the air, why not hold them out in front of you?"

Her shoulders slumped and she pouted. "I said I don't want to use my hands though." Windy, however, floated over to Dio and cocked her head to the side inquisitively.

"I didn't say you needed to move your hands, dear," he said, reaching a hand up to pet Windy on her head, earning him a swift blush from his roommate while the Stand just made a soft yet happy trilling noise, "Just hold them out. Not unlike warming your hands in front of a fire."

Sunnie considered Dio's suggestion for a moment and Windy returned to her, circling her a few times before holding her hands out. Sunnie then grinned and gave her Stand a double high-five before facing the can again, determined. "Alright." Both user and Stand readied their hands. "Second try. Let's crush this bitch."

Seventy two minutes after that, there was a small, barely-there flicker of flour kicking up about an inch away from the can. Sunnie's eyes sharpened and she leaned forward a bit, focusing on it like a hawk.

"Shit. There–I just—"

Dio raised an eyebrow and watched as more flour began flying in the air bit by bit, like a butterfly unsure of how to get off the ground.

"Come on," she grunted, "A dome…"

The geometric wing shapes on Windy's outer wrists flared up, spreading open slowly into ferocious points as the flour began to swirl around the can in a circle. Sunnie's skin glistened with sweat, her teeth gritted and her jaw tight. Her fingers twitched, tensing up, and her hands shook from being held up for so long, for trying as long as she had been. Puffs of flour shot off in a few directions, and the white particles churned up and around, the rough shape of a dome slowly becoming more and more refined, twisting faster and faster.

Dio sat forward in the chair slightly, watching the scene before him with interest. He knew she'd already been working hard earlier that day, doing tests with Catherine and Ellison, and humans typically felt fatigue when using their Stands for extended periods of time. She was already tired when she came back down to their suite, and she was pushing herself even further simply because of an idea she had.

She truly was a fascinatingly stubborn woman.

The dome around the can smoothed out, and both Sunnie and her Stand's fingers were trembling with effort and single-minded focus. The geometric wings on Windy's head had also begun to grow in length, the Stand's narrowed yellow eyes nearly glowing.

Then in a flash of a second, Sunnie turned her hands upwards and clenched her fist, and the aluminum buckled inward with a metallic crunch.

It took a second for her to process what had just happened. Her eyes were wide, her mouth dropped open slightly, and her breath stuttered. The room was silent for a moment, and she shot up off of the sofa, threw her fists up in the air, and crowed with triumphant laughter.

"HAH!! I GOT YOU, YOU METAL MOTHERFUCKER!!! I CONQUERED YOUR ASS!!! I FUCKING DID IT!!!!! YEAAAAAAH!!!!"

But almost the second she was up, she was falling. Dust in the Wind vanished and she toppled to the side, and Dio was there to catch her.

"If you make any sort of 'falling for me' joke," Sunnie grunted, "I am going to kick your ass."

"You're far too tired for that, darling," he chuckled, "And I highly doubt that you could."

"I would fucking try," she insisted, trying to move. "…My bones are jelly. Help."

"You worked hard today, Sunshine," he said, standing up with her in his arms, "And you accomplished something fantastic. I'm quite impressed, you know."

She buried her face in his chest to avoid him seeing the blush on her face. "Shut up. I wanna hibernate now."

"Understood," he said, turning to the hall and starting to walk as a grin curled his lips.

"Maybe…" she mumbled softly, "maybe I'll try the second method later."

"There's an idea," Dio replied, The World materializing in front of him and opening the door to Sunnie's room, following its user in as Dio walked over to her messy bed.

"Ellison can probably get his hands on some instruments that can help," she continued as Dio bent over, laying her down on the nest of fluffy blankets and pillows on her mattress, "It's not like I can, like… see air pressure. I need to monitor that shit."

"That would certainly make it easier for you," he murmured, pulling her favorite comforter over her as she snuggled her face into her pillow.

"Dioooo," she whined after a second, "I'm gross."

"You're not gross," he laughed softly, moving a bit of her wet hair out of her face.

"I'm sweaty."

"That isn't gross," he continued, "That's just proof of your incredible efforts tonight. You can bathe when you wake."

"Fine," she huffed, her eyes losing the fight to stay open. "Night, Dio."

Dio stood and turned to leave her room, eyes twinkling. "Goodnight, Sunshine."

[mistabullets]

Hello I wasn’t sure if requests were open if not pls ignore me oofb but I would like to request HC of Pt3 Jotaro, DIO , and Bucci gang with a super affectionate s/o but when in a fight she becomes super strong fierce and like a total savage! Thanks

gentle reminder that max characters allowed for hc requests are three (if you want the usual bullet point hc’s). pls be sure you’re reading the rules. anyway, i’m going to do abba and pt 3 jotaro and dio. enjoy anon!

Jotaro Kujo

You’re the only one able to give Jotaro the slightest bit of affection. Of course, he’ll gruff and huff about it, muttering his usual catchphrase but he relaxes in your arms in minutes. While he didn’t like the attention drawn to him and the other crusaders teasing him, he couldn’t be mean to you. It was hard to deny you anything really.

You’re the complete opposite of your boyfriend. You can be super loud and annoying, but often times people thought you were the sweetest person out there. You were always finding gifts for your fellow crusaders or hugging them after a long intense battle, much to Jotaro’s dismay. But people notice how Jotaro was so much different around you.

It wasn’t always like this. Jotaro at first, thought you were another dumb bimbo (or himbo). He was mean to you, telling you shut up but you would just laugh at it off, much to his annoyance. No one could really bring down your spirits and you figured black-haired boy had others things to worry about. Eventually, he learned to tolerate you and your antics.

Jotaro’s opinion of you did a complete 180 in the midst of an enemy’s attack. While the man was completely immobilizied by the stand, you had jumped into action. You had discovered the enemy’s weak spot by quiet observation with its interactions with Jotaro. Then you strike, a ferocious glint twinkled in your eyes as swiftly approached it, getting in a critical hit.

Usually, he would never return your hugs but that night, he did, patting the top of your head. Since then, he’s been more patient with you. He tried his best to engage in small talk, discuss about normal high school life, and how much you miss home. Jotaro would make plans out of blue, without your knowledge but you were more than happy to tag along.

Whenever you said something kind of cheesy or stupid, Jotaro rather ignored it and gave a small chuckle. He began to reciprocate more of your touches and made advances of his own. Your blossoming relationship with the teen was quite bizarre. No one thought he would ever consider dating someone like yourself. But things worked in mysterious and weird ways.

Dio Brando

You’re one of his favorite pets! Dio enjoys just how submissive you are, willing to give in to him, and satisfied him with all your kisses and caresses. You’re able to love so naturally and devote all of your time and energy to Dio. Plus, with your love, comes obedience. You were perhaps the easiest to discipline, always learning from your mistakes with grace.

Dio usually goes through pets but he has kept you around the longest. Some of his agents and servants may be confused. Sure, you’re cute, but there are certainly humans who could beat you when it comes to natural beauty. What they don’t know is... you’re not a simple domesticated housecat, but more like a wild tiger prepared to strike Dio’s traitors.

Sure, the vampire is particularly invincible but that doesn’t mean some of his servants have attempted to rid the world of such vile evilness. After one particular night, an agent managed to sneak in the master bedroom. In reality, the agent turned out to be a spy sent by the Speedwagon Foundation to aid in the Crusaders efforts to discover Dio’s stand.

However, you had woke from the creaking of footsteps, carefully listening. You had two options: devote your life to Dio or take the chance to escape while you can. Perhaps being here for too long had deluded you but you choose the former. You believed you had come to the mansion for some sort of purpose, it would be to protect your lord Dio.

After careful observation and quick thinking, your brought forth your stand. The spy would have never guess Dio’s mistress was possibly a stand user as well. Your master awoke to the gargling of blood and behold the sight of you standing over the corpse. When he demanded an explanation, you were honest. There was no reason for you the hide the truth.

“This man was going to hurt you. So... I felt the urge to protect you, Lord Dio.” You unveiled your stand to your master and an amused grin spread his lips. Never did he imagine his pet to be so loyal and protective. This is way, to this day, you’re alive and well. Always by his side. Perhaps one day, he’ll bestow the gift of immortality to you and have you forever.

Leone Abbacchio

Out of all the men, Abbacchio just doesn’t feel like he deserves any attention; no ounce of love could ever redeem him. Which is why at first, he tended to avoid you. He chalked up an excuse of you being simply too loud and annoying. In actuality, he was afraid of becoming too close with another human being. The only one he could trust was Bruno.

However, he was technically your superior, so Abbacchio had to oversee some of your missions. He kept you on the sidelines, constantly near him. Leone would hate if you, the newbie, were to be hurt by the enemy. Or worse, dead. But one particular mission, you became annoyed. Your stand was perfect for this mission but he told you to stay back.

You defied him. He saw the determination beamed in your eyes. Abbacchio was too shocked by your insubordination that he couldn’t stop you from running headfirst to the battle unfolding to help Narancia. He tried to yell your name but you ignored him. You unleashed your stand. Thanks to Narancia’s Aerosmith, you had the upper hand.

With both of you focusing on one target, it was quite simple to bring down the enemy. Narancia feared for the lecture you would receive from Abbacchio... you could tell he was angry with you. But you were surprised on the car ride back, he didn’t dare raise a voice at you. Weird, you have always seen him lecturing the others for their recklessness.

He checked on you that evening, for any injuries and for a mission report. “Hey,” he said in an almost-whisper and your eyes met his, the golden hues softened. “I don’t mean to doubt your abilities. I’m just very cautious and don’t want to possibly risk losing someone in vain.” You reached for his hand and apologized for the trouble. He blushed at this gesture.

Since then, the both of you learned how to communicate with each other... eventually, Abbacchio tolerated subtle touches, eventually craving for more... likes hugs and kisses. The two of you developed feelings for each other, surprising considering how cold and brutal Leone could be around others. But it seems like each day, he seemed a littule brighter.

[imagine-fight-write]

RANDOM - Banana Fish Review, Vol. 1, Part Four

(This was one of my fav gifs looking for gifs of Shorter.)

*There will be pictures/gifs included tomorrow, because this is already late & loading them is taking forever, for some reason.

Haha, no, I actually prettied it up 1/5/21. Yes, I’m glorious.

No I’m actually Dio DIO in this situation, who am I kidding.

(This transition from Caesar to Dio fascinates me, by the way.) (The GIF.)

The JOJO reference is because I’ve finally finished Diamond is Unbreakable! It was fun! I enjoyed it a lot! Ready for the next part!

But back to Banana Fish.

Hope you enjoy this!

So my plans failed again. Who is surprised? (Not me.)

I apologize profusely for the gaping void of Banana Fish-ness left since last I posted.

No really. I now have an alarm set for every Wednesday.

Let’s see how this goes. News Update: Maybe next time.

Also, my internet is still blitzy & rotten, otherwise I would’ve posted this yesterday (the 15th).

Now on to the in-depth, delighted gushing - er, review, of Banana Fish!

*Also, this is part 4, and 4 is a special number for me. Because of this guy:

And I can spell his name correctly!!! (It’s Ulquiorra, from Bleach, my 1st anime fan gushing love.)

Yes, I’m strange. Moving on.

So, brief recap, since I’m not sure anyone has read Part 3, given how terrifyingly long it is. If you missed it, here’s the link:

https://imagine-fight-write.tumblr.com/post/632014616404344832/random-banana-fish-review-vol-1-part-3-my

Please love & like it & repost to the rest of the Web. I worked tremendously hard on it.

Yes it’s long, but oh, it was delightful! There was snark! Delicious food! Wine! Fabulous mustaches! Mysteries! I gushed so much!

(And snarled at the wonton waste of good breakfast food, which I will not forget & always condemn.)

*I mean, I know people who will throw up if they have breakfast in the morning. But it’s important to eat so you have energy to do things & feel good.

And Dino took a perfectly beautiful breakfast & essentially wasted it for no good reason. I was so mad.

We meet Dino Golzine, a.k.a., Ash’s worst nemesis /enemy (note, I can’t spell nemesis) and major reason for why his life sucks.

(Although society doesn’t help either. Though the police try. They really do. Except what’s his face who’s complete scum & thoughtless, but we won’t meet him til Vol. 2. Plus I don’t think he has a name?)

But yes, Dino Golzine. All around awful person, and not safe around children (or anyone, really.) He’s low-key in this scene, mostly using verbal assaults (to great effect) but just you wait. There’s a reason he’s a mob boss.

Ash snarks, to great effect, but he’s no match. Dino has all the cards and all the dice (cards & dice being metaphors for power, & how he involves awful, painful memories of Ash’s past & tries to manipulate & order him around. Brrr.)

But Ash rallies, and ultimately refuses returning to be Dino’s heir / toy.

We meet Shorter! Huzzah!

(End of recap.)

It’s clear right away Shorter & Ash are old friends. They exchange quips about Marvin. We learn Marvin holds a mean grudge, so savvy readers can guess it’ll come to play later (it does.)

Shorter’s last line is strange.

“Just don’t put me in the position of having to kill you.”

Which is kinda out of the blue. I don’t know what to make of it. It doesn’t spoil or fore-shadow anything (unless in a very confused, round-about way) because that never happens later. So I’m confused.

Ash laughs it off and goes zooming off on his motor-bike / motorcycle (not sure which).

Note, from this short scene we already learn Shorter has his own sources of information - he knows Ash went to Dino’s, fast enough to be there before their conversation ended (unless he was just lucky to be there already  - why was he there?). He already knows about Ash’s talk with Marvin, with enough detail to warn Ash about Marvin’s temper & that Marvin likes him, which is a bad combination.

Shorter is smart & cares about his friends, warning Ash about Marvin. 

Aren’t friends great?

Especially after meeting such a dominating if soft spoken monster like Dino?

The answer is yes.

Next, we get this hilariously great shot of Ash running up the steps to his dingy apartment (pg. 47.)

 It’s reminiscent for me of a scene in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure, Part 1, when Jonathan & Dino have their epic fight in the Joestar mansion.

There’s a part where Jonathan does this epic flip up to a second floor via sword (it’s epic) & it ends with this a few-seconds-longer-than it-needs-to-be shot of his butt. You can’t miss it. I’m usually oblivious to such things & I noticed it. I laugh every single time.

Anyway, back to Banana Fish.

(The atmosphere of grunginess (it’s not a word, I meant dirty, ugly, rough) & spartan furniture is great. Just look at those walls. I adore it. 

(But would never want to live there.) Ash is clearly not rich & after Dino’s rich mansion, this is a stark contrast.

Also, there are no pictures or posters on the walls (which are festooned with dirt and cracks instead.) In fact, there’s almost nothing in terms of personal effects at all.

This baffles me. I mean yes, I assume they’re all dirt poor, living in a gang & working for the mafia on the side isn’t something you do for the luxuries. But surely they’d have something.

Or maybe it has something to do with Japanese decorating aesthetics? Meaning, Japanese appear to be more spartan than Americans in terms of decor (see the book, In Praise of Shadows, for example.) 

* I can’t spell aesthetics. Why do I even use that word?

The apartment just looks extremely bare compared to others I’ve seen in movies depicting this era. Is what I’m saying.

Look at those bare walls. (It hurts me.)

Thoughts? Comments on how Japanese, Americans, and Europeans differ in basic decorating styles? Comment below!

Also remember as always, Banana Fish is both set & was written in the 1980’s, well before the “modern” style we have now.

Unless - wait. There is something very important to Ash which he’s clearly hiding in the apartment he goes to, which I assume only Skip & select members know about.

So maybe this isn’t actually Ash’s main base, where he sleeps & hangs out?

Yes, that must be it.

If you’re confused, I’ll explain once we get done with this section.

Moving on.

We meet Skip!!!! (Pg.47)

Black characters (and Latino) are still, alas, extremely rare in manga, anime, & other media, so all the cheers for including Skip so early & as such an important character.

Because Skip is very important. For multiple reasons. More on that later. Also note, 1 of the gang members Ash busts earlier is also black.

Again, the dialogue is great here between Ash & Skip, establishing Ash’s trust in him. Which is no small thing.

Skip is like Shorter, (agh, both their names start with S) sweet, but also has a nose for news.

Arthur’s going to get it, hah!

There’s yet another reference to it being early.

Though there’s no specific time mentioned . . . Nope, not since Ash found the poor, dying banana fish dude.

Does Ash usually sleep in? Is he a night owl? He was wandering around at 1 in the morning last night, after all.

*Yes, technically it was early morning, but it was still dark, so bite me.

But then, he was also suspicious & keeping tabs on his 2 gang members. So, who knows.

But I’m going to guess he’s a night owl.

Ash sits on the bed, and after Skip mentions everything is good, “him, too”.

 Ash gives his 1st real, genuine smile. Gentle, relieved, no hard edges. Just pure happiness & relief. It’s sweet.

(Also, I just realized the “him, too” is supposed to be a surprise / shock for the reader & I spoiled it earlier. I do apologize.)

Skip offers to get coffee but Ash declines, deciding to nap, which reminds me:

Actually, drinking coffee before you take a nap can, for some people, actually make you sleep better.

Also, short cat naps (15-30mins) can boost your energy and mood.

Naps are good for you!

I almost wondered if the comics Skip had on the table might’ve been manga, but remembered it was the 1980’s and, far as I know, manga wasn’t big the U.S. yet. Alas!

Which is funny if you think about this being in a manga.

Skip goes to leave. Ash puts his hand in his pocket and gets this intense, almost fierce expression on his face (middle panel, pg. 48).

I was absolutely baffled by this reaction for a long time, but finally figured it out. Ash’s reaction is supposed to be baffling, because what he realizes right here will be revealed in the next few pages.

Skip, concerned, asks what’s up, but Ash brushes him off and sends him off to buy coffee. (After which I sincerely hope he takes a nap, because he needs one, he’s been up all night.) Sleep is good for you!

Skip is able to buy coffee with a single coin. A single coin.

(Sorry, I couldn’t resist.)

All my tears, and curses on inflation and overpriced coffee! And Starbucks!

Anyway, we learn Arthur’s going to get it (and Skip is the best spy ever) and the scene cuts to:

Our favorite person (not) Dino Golzine, tending his orchids.

I like this. It’s a rather unique hobby for a villian. I assume to give him a refined, elegant, and exact air.

He’s interrupted by Angie & his fabulous mustache (snickers) and this delightfully comic scientist person (who might be important later? The face sameness makes it difficult to judge, & I’m too lazy to consult my other volumes, which are not close by.)

But his entrance is priceless (pg. 50). I mean seriously, please go find it if you haven’t already. It’s dramatic, with a big WHAM! & he looks so cartoonish. 

I love it.

Dino tells him, essentially, “don’t disturb my orchids” and me being an non-gardner person, I wonder: is it actually true loud noises can disturb flowers?

Comment below!

Anyway, Dino quickly establishes yes, he did send Ash’s gang members to kill the poor banana fish guy who started this whole mystery, and yes, it was important.

There’s a great panel (pg. 51) of scientist dude, drawn much less comedic, the whole panel black except for a white aura around him sweating and clearly in distress.

He whispers, “It - it’s gone.”

Dino snaps to attention with a leonine look, exactly like a cat who has just spotted another cat. It’s easily my favorite picture of Dino so far, very striking.

The dialogue is brilliant and snappy, short and direct.

“What is gone? . . . You’re positive? . . . Just a small amount.”

And we get the grand reveal:

Ash, taking out a bullet shaped capsule (was the shape intentional by Yoshida?). A capsule he’d clearly taken from the dying banana fish guy. There’s a great panel on the bottom of pg. 52 of Ash’s questioning expression and a ?

He unscrews the capsule and pulls out a tiny vial.

Thinks of the address the dying banana fish guy gave him.

Ash goes into the next room, where we see the silhouette of someone sitting with a plaid blanket draped across their knees.

He expresses his first real look of vulnerability, and gives a wonderful line:

“Go see . . . Banana fish . . . He said it and died. And you say it and you might as well be dead. Who did this to you? Griff . . . Please tell me, big brother.”

Everything clicks together (almost.)

Griff /Griffin is the soldier shown way back in the very beginning. The one who left for a few minutes and came back insane and shot up his squad.

Who’s now a human vegetable.

Banana fish is clearly responsible. Somehow.

And Dino is mixed in with it (of course). Pieces are coming together, but questions still remain.

Until next time!