#i mean for fuck's sake he built ultron

[thebrigeedadraws]

Day 19: Out Of Reach

Thankfully

Hopefully

For now

[sayruq]

Hi! I was browsing your anti tags and came across a post where you mentioned that Tony was a mess in Endgame because of his relationship with Pepper. Why is that? Do you mean he was badly written or too out of character? I liked how he actually moved on and chose to do what he perceived as the right thing anyway.

i haven't seen endgame since it aired so forgive any mistakes.

that's because it's out of character and he's badly written. from the moment tony flew into the wormhole in avengers 1, he has been consumed by his fear of what thanos would do. 2 movies dealt with the psychological fallout of that moment. in ironman 3, tony had debilitating panic attacks and in age of ultron, he grew so paranoid after wanda fucked with his head that he thought it was a good idea to mess with loki's sceptre which led to ultron's creation. tony pushed himself for years to create technology that could compete with thanos. it fucked him up that the world could end and he would be powerless to stop it.

then the world ended and tony had tried his best to stop it. he made a suit that could handle a moon but he didn't save peter, he didn't save half the universe.  in endgame, he fucking shrugged his worst nightmare off and went to live as pepper's male wife. it baffles me how tony stans are focused on his death when this is the worst thing that ever happened to tony. who cares that he died when tony spent 5 years doing nothing? nothing! tony's strength is that he is always doing something. his entire arc is about him redeeming himself for being a war profiteer and this is where it ends???? tony living in a cottage with a five year old kid???? a kid who only exists so that tony can't turn back time at the end of the movie??? that's how you end the arc of the biggest character in your biggest movie?

sorry if i sound so angry. it's just that i was so excited for endgame because i knew tony would not rest until thanos was dealt with. i knew that man would work himself half to death trying to come up with something. while you don't want your favorite character to suffer, you want them to be in character. but then i got nothing. i got tony stark, pepper potts' husband and who the fuck wants that? the most important aspect of tony's character is that he is ironman. his relationship with pepper was always a c plot and whatever 'problems' they had were resolved in ironman 3. in age of ultron, thor and tony compared girlfriends as though anyone cares and that was it! until the russos decided they broke up to give tony angst in a movie where he fights against the avengers which meant that in homecoming, pepperony had to get resolved again.

i hadn't realised then that the russos thought tony needed to settle down. it hadn't occurred to me that they thought pepperony was a b plot that could compete with tony being ironman because infinity war tony was top tier. he was ironman and he went through hell, that's tony stark summarised. so i was pumped for endgame just to see tony, just to see what he would do.... he did nothing for 5 years before inventing time travel overnight. what bullshit is that? those motherfuckers could have had tony working on time travel for 5 years with scott providing any missing answers. how is the overnight invention of time travel supposed to be satisfying for me? remember when tony built his first suits or when he invented a new element? that was satisfying because tony put in effort. he wasn't unreasonably intelligent for the sake of the plot.

all of this because the russos thought the most important thing for tony is for him to marry pepper and have a child. tony and pepper don't have chemistry and worse their dynamic is that of a manchild and his long suffering assistant. it remained this way until endgame when tony 'grew up' and became boring. you know how everyone complained about steve going back in time for peggy? i feel the same way about pepperony. that's something you do when you misunderstand the characters that you're writing. if tony was meant to be a stay at home husband and father, it would have happened in im3 but it never did until endgame.

tony's death didn't have any impact on me because it didn't feel tragic. imagine if tony actually spent 5 years trying to find a way to fix what thanos destroyed. imagine how it would have felt if at the end of the movie, tony has done it. he has the stones and he saved the universe. he beat thanos, he brought peter back, he saved his loved ones, and then he died. seeing those other characters standing around fighting tears would have hit even harder because that tony never rested, he fought for all of them and he paid for it with his life.

tony started ironman 1 selfish and he died in endgame choosing his daughter over billions (trillions if you count everyone in the universe). sure he saved everyone but it doesnt feel like a complete arc, it felt like a huge misstep. i might be dramatic but tony is one of my favorite characters and that is the last movie he will ever appear in

[areiton]

text me maybe

Summary: 

He's drunk and there's a really hazy decade in the nineties that Rhodey looks pained when he even thinks about that says doing shit when he's drunk is a bad idea.

There's also a new building on MIT campus and a yearly donation that supports that theory.

But MIT and Rhodey are far away and that clunky black flip phone is not, and he snarls as he snatches it up and punches in the message.

It takes almost five minutes because the tech is obsolete and he is drunk but he does and he smiles at it, viciously pleased.

~*~

Chapter 1 of 4. Lots of angst and miscommunication and pining. Enjoy. 

Read on AO3 

~*~ 

He's drunk and there's a really hazy decade in the nineties that Rhodey looks pained when he even thinks about that says doing shit when he's drunk is a bad idea.

There's also a new building on MIT campus and a yearly donation that supports that theory.

But MIT and Rhodey are far away and that clunky black flip phone is not, and he snarls as he snatches it up and punches in the message.

It takes almost five minutes because the tech is obsolete and he is drunk but he does and he smiles at it, viciously pleased.

 You're an asshole. Taking the kids cuz mommy and daddy couldn't hack it? Dick move. The whole world, Cap and you just--- you threw it all away for a zombie wearing a dead memory's face. I hope he's fucking worth it.

 ~*~

 When he wakes up, his fingers are sticky with scotch and the phone is warm in his hand. He glares at it for a long moment, and then shoves it in the pillows of the couch and stumbles to the bathroom to shower. The kid will be by, later, and he doesn’t want to look like a complete wreck when he shows up.

 ~*~

 Tony is very good at compartmentalization and he manages to ignore his drunk texting until two days later. He’s finally let Peter out of the lab, and the kid is busily eating his way through the fridge and the truly frightening amount of greek takeout they ordered, when he startles and digs around in the cushions to produce the phone.

“Uh,” he says, staring at it and Tony flushes.

Which is ridiculous. The kid doesn’t even know what the hell the phone is for, much less who is on the other end. He has no reason to be flushing, for god’s sake.

“That’s some pretty outdated tech, Mr. Stark,” Peter grins and Tony scowls.

“Give it here, brat,” he grumbles, and Peter happily hands it over.

Habit has him flipping it over, but shock makes him still, staring at it.

Steve texted back.

~*~

 He isn’t drunk when he reads it.

He does wait until Peter is passed out in his room, and a drink is poured and untouched next to him. Then he sighs and opens it up because ignoring it won’t make the text vanish and it won’t satisfy his curiosity.

He opens it and--

His heart stops.

 You’re right.

I’m sorry.

I’m so fucking sorry.

 ~*~

 Steve Rogers doesn’t apologize.

He doesn’t admit he’s wrong.

He’s got that in common with Tony.

But that--that right there is blinking at him in heavily pixalated black and grey, and it’s not going away just because years of experience says Rogers doesn’t apologize.

He ignores it for most of the day, and then sighs.

Fucking curiosity.

 What the hell does that even mean.

 ~*~

 What happened in Siberia--it wasn’t your fault.

We were wrong.

We should never have been there and--you weren’t in the wrong.

I’m sorry.

 ~*~

 He doesn’t answer.

He doesn’t know how to answer.

Of all the things he hoped for when he drunk texted Steve--this wasn’t it. This was the very last thing he expected.

He ignores it because he doesn’t know what to do with it, and he thinks, maybe, if he does respond--he’ll beg Steve to come home.

 ~*~

 He doesn’t miss Steve. Not really. He misses the team, the family that they had built, has missed that since the Ultron debacle and the Avengers move away from the tower.

He’s lonely. Especially now, with Potts gone and moving on with Norman fucking Osborn, of all people. He doesn’t begrudge her that any more than he wants Steve home.

He’s lonely.

He wonders if he’ll ever get used to this--to being alone, to being left behind, to being forgotten.

 ~*~

 If you know you were wrong--why are you still gone. Why not come back? Walk me through your logic.

 He isn’t drunk, exactly. But he isn’t sober either and he thinks even as he hits send--it’s a stupid thing to ask.

He hits send anyway.

 ~*~

 It got bigger than just me, somewhere along the road. I can’t control this, can’t control him. I wish--

Going home isn’t an option. Hasn’t been for a long time, Stark.

 ~*~

 He turns that over in his head for a few days.

There’s a depth and awareness that he didn’t expect from Steve. Not that Rogers was dumb--he wasn’t, not even to Tony--but he wasn’t good at looking deep, especially in himself. And this--it’s strange. It’s not what he expected, not from Steve and his abiding sense of righteousness, his belief that he was right.

Even in Siberia, when Barnes was shaking and guilt was wild in his eyes--that hadn’t wavered in Rogers.

He doesn’t have any fucking idea what to do with it, if it is. He doesn’t know what to do with a Captain America that’s anything less than rock steady.

 ~*~

 Jarvis--not JARVIS, but my Jarvis--told me that home is always an option. That it’s what we make, not a place or a person. Home can change. Maybe you can’t go home--maybe that went out the window when you came out of the ice. But you can find a new home. I hope that we can all do that.

 ~*~

 They don’t text every day.

Most days, they don’t. He can go a week without hearing from Steve, go a week without reaching out to him. He’s got his hands full, trying to rework the Accords, trying to calm down the UN and WSC after the Rogues drop off the map.

Pepper comes back, but it’s not the same, it’s tense and wrong, like both of them are trying to force themselves back into a shape that just doesn’t fit.  For the first time, maybe ever, he understands Steve and the out of step disconnect the other man had always felt.

He feels that way now. The world is moving on, moving past the Avengers and he’s—not.

He’s stuck still, clinging to ghosts and memories and a girlfriend who doesn’t want him, and he doesn’t know how it happened or what it even means for the future.

So they don’t text every day. He’s busy. He throws himself into inventing, churns out two new apps for SI and a new tablet that makes Pepper so happy for a week, he almost thinks they can fix this broken thing between them. He build and rebuilds braces for Rhodey until the other man forbids him from touching his legs, and then sits through his PT like if he stares and hopes hard enough—he’ll be able to fix Rhodey.

And he starts working on a prosthetic arm.

He knows, even as he starts sketching the design, that what he’s doing is stupid and self-destructive—but he doesn’t let that stop him.

He tells himself it’s for SI—but it’s a lie and even he knows it.

He doesn’t text Steve about it.

 ~*~

 Peter and Rhodey hate the Rogues. It’s something he knew but it was very abstract, a kind of reassuring dislike that he was content to ignore. Now though--now he listens to them, listens to Peter bitch about Sam and Bucky and Wanda, listens to Rhodey’s grumbling about Steve and he feels almost guilty for the phone, black and heavy and bricklike in his pocket. For the texts he sends and the fact that he still hasn’t told them.  

He doesn’t really forgive Steve for what he did. But with every text, laced with guilt and apology and the hint of an explanation--he feels like he could.

He could let it go, set it down, have his family back.

“What about Kamala?” Rhodey says, frowning at his tablet. He’s busy rebuilding the Avengers, shaping the future of heroing into something good, something pure and reminiscent of Peter--and Tony swallows his guilt, because he’s still clinging to ghosts.

 Are we friends?

 ~*~

 I want us to be.

 ~*~

 Tony doesn’t answer.

He doesn’t want to say--me too.

And he isn’t sure he can honestly say anything else.

 ~*~

 Did you pick this just to piss me off?

 He's grumpy when he sends the message but not drunk.  Tony hasn't decided if that's an improvement or not.

 I don't think so?

 Tony snorts. Of course not. Steve just never thinks about things like tech and how Tony might react to it. Maybe because he spent so long in ice. The man still carried paper to write his notes on.

 It's like you took the shittiest tech you could find in Sokovia and sent it my way to drive me insane.

 Can't you integrate it with your AI, use your own tech to override it?

 That makes Tony pause. Because yes, of course he can. But Steve doesn't know or care about his tech, never has. He licks his lips and shakes the thought. That this is wrong--something about this.

 Instead he types.

 Well. If you don't mind, I'll go to work.  

 ~*~

 It gets easier to text after that, and there's something dangerous about it being easy, something that makes it more tempting.

He doesn't need to text Steve.

But sometimes, he wants to.

Sometimes, he texts inane things, shit that doesn't seem to matter to the situation at all.

 I never had a friend like Bucky. Sometimes I thought I did.

 Rhodey, he comes closest. But Rhodey wouldn't burn the world for me.

 I want to understand but I don't. I don't think anyone can.

 And sometimes--sometimes it's days between his texting and Steve responding. But he does.

He always responds.

 I don’t think I had a friend like Bucky. I think--it’s complicated.

 Rhodey loves you. He found you, in Afghanistan. He wouldn’t burn the world for you--but he’d search the wreckage and pull you out, and take you home.

I don’t understand. I wish I did.

 Tony doesn’t know why it helps, that uncertainty. He only knows that it does.

 ~*~

 The first time it happens, he’s in a board meeting. Pepper is sitting next to him and the CFO is droning on about stock prices, while her smile gets tighter and tighter and he really just wants to shuck off the damn suit, change into something he can get dirty, and tear into Peter’s Spider suit. There’s something wrong with the gliders and he wants to figure out what before the kid splats on the pavement of Queens.

His phone dings and he glances down.

 Went to a cathedral today--left the rest of the team behind, even though I know they’ll be pissed when I get back. I just needed a break from the bickering? And it was nice--being alone. I love them. All of them. But sometimes it’s nice to be alone.

 Tony blinks at it. Because there’s nothing there to respond to. But there’s everything there to respond to. It’s an invitation, into his day, alone.

 Not alone if you’re texting me, are you.

 The answer comes quick, quicker than he expects, and his heart-rate picks up, and a smile strings across his lips, small but fond.

 No, but maybe I want your company.

 ~*~

 Things change after that. Not right away. But it’s...easier.

Steve texts when he wanders the far-flung cities the Rogues are hiding in. Sometimes, he texts pictures, little snapshots of the sky or birds on the ground, food or a book open next to his coffee--he’s drinking it creamy and thin these days, something that startles Tony--and it’s nice. Soothing.

A glimpse into a world Tony honestly thought he’d never be allowed inside again.

The texts are lighter, teasing. Sometimes, Tony thinks Steve might even be flirting, when he sends pictures of empty benches and wish you were here.

When he asks about Tony’s day, when he asks about SI and what Tony is building now--it feels like curiosity and not Steve pressing for information.

 ~*~

 I’m giving DUM-E to the college. For real this time.

 You won’t. You love him.

 Six hundred thousand in tech doused in fire repellant.

 Kids are expensive.

 Tony barks a laugh.

 You’d know--you took ‘em with you when you left.

 There’s a long beat and Tony thinks he overstepped--that Steve will lash out. He’s never liked it much when Tony joked about something this serious. Always expected Tony to treat it with the same gravity he treated everything.

Then.

 I’ll take the bots if you take the whiny bastards back.

 Tony laughs outright at that.

 No deal, sweetheart.

 ~*~

 He doesn't talk about the Accords. He's absorbed in them, in reworking them so they aren't fucking over every superpowered person trying to make the world better--but they're what broke his family, what caused Steve to run.

So he doesn't talk about it.

But Steve--Steve pushes.

 Why are you on the committee to amend the Accords?

 He stares at the message for a long time, not sure how to respond or if he should respond. It feels dangerous but he also thinks--it's genuine. That he really wants to know.

 Because I want to make them better. They were always a work in progress--they're a jumping off point. I want to make them better, for us and the world.

 There's silence after that, long enough Tony wonders if he misstepped, if Steve is gonna run now.

It takes another four hours and then,

 Can i read them?

 ~*~

 “You seem happier,” Peter says, one day. It’s in the middle of Tony talking about the upgrades he put into the suit, completely out of nowhere, and it draws him up short, makes him blink at the kid.

“I didn’t realize I was unhappy,” he says slowly. It’s a lie, and the wrinkled nose Peter gives him let’s him know exactly what Peter thinks of his lie, but he doesn’t argue. Just shrugs and smiles.

“You were,” he says, confidently. “I don’t blame you--not after Germany.”

“Pete,” he says, and Peter sighs.

“I don’t--I know you don’t want to talk about it. But you were sad, after Germany. And I get why--Rhodey and Ms. Potts, and everything--but you’re happier now. I don’t know why. But I’m glad.”

Tony pauses, thinking about the texts that no one knows about, the endless conversation with Steve that doesn’t always make sense to him, but that never fails to make him smile.

“What do you think of them--the Rogues?” Tony asks, and Peter looks at him.

There’s something like anger in his eyes, but his smile is gentle and sincere when he says, “If you trust them--I trust you.”

He wonders if it can be that simple.

 Pete says I’m happier.

 He sends the message, not sure entirely why. It feels too honest, too exposed and vulnerable, but he’s curious what Steve will say.

 Who is pete?

 Tony curses. He forgets, that not everyone knows his fledgling protege. For a long moment, he’s not sure how to respond. There’s a part of him that wants to tell Steve. Wants to confide about this brilliant boy with his impossibly big heart, the one who is stupidly brave and desperate to help, who makes Tony think he could be better.

And there is--the need to protect him. Trusting Steve again is Tony’s choice. His mistake to make, if it turns out to be a mistake.

But it’s not Peter’s choice. And Tony won’t make it for him.

 New guy at SI. You don’t know him.

 There isn’t a response, long enough that Tony puts the phone aside and goes back to working on the suit with Peter, and it’s hours later he stops and looks at the message.

 I’m glad your happy, Tony.

~*~

 He likes texting when he can't sleep. He wonders sometimes, if the time zones keeps Steve present during those sleepless nights or id he too is plagued by nightmares that makes sleep so elusive.

Either way--when he texts late at night, there is always a response.

It's easier, under the whisper thin cover of dark, to be honest.

 I miss you.

 Why? I brought you nothin but headache and heartache.

 There was good times. Wasn't there?

 Of course there were.

 I wish--

 What

 Wish things were different. wish we weren’t on different sides.

 His breath catches, his throat tight.

 if we were? what would you want?

 There’s a part of him that feels ridiculous, like a high schooler with their first crush, waiting impatiently for an answer. When it does come through, it makes his breath catch in his throat.

 everything

Chapter 2 

[awfully-sadistic]

Spooktober Quickie #4

“A six-person rig?” Dot Dreadful asked, peering around at her partners for this round of cleanup duty. She was currently surrounded by a team of six people, paired up in twos. Eager young faces mingled with apprehension because it was a thing they had all wanted yet it wasn’t a fun activity to do. “Wouldn’t that be a little dangerous?” she asked into her comm, linked back to Homebase. On the other end sat Bruce Wayne filling in as a sorts while the Fury’s attended to matters on the other side of the world with superheroes to fill in the ranks.

“Normally, yes, but I didn’t trust just four of you to go out on your own.” Bruce commented back, sounding static-y and distant on the other end. He had an almost detached way of speaking but by now, Dot knew he meant well. He might have been emotionally stunted, but he managed to show he cared in other ways. Such as sending his little horde of Robins to protect her while they did a last-minute sweep for an Ultron-infected zone somewhere in an urban neighborhood.

“Why do we hunt in fours anyway?” Timothy “Tim” Drake asked, the only other person aside from Dot that had experience in the rig. Beside him stood his elder (adopted brothers) Richard “Dick” Grayson and Jason Todd and his younger (adopted) brother, Damian Wayne. Duke Thomas might have been a Robin once, but he usually went by as The Signal and would not be excluded in a line-up of Robins, past and present. The girls, on the other hand, made up of Batgirls and affiliated members of the Bat Family stood by with Bruce Wayne, prepared to hop in at a moment’s notice.

At the moment, despite the many people surrounding Dot, no one had an answer for Tim’s question. It had always just been a thing, to hunt in fours, and there hadn’t been an confirmation about whether it was a rule or not and nobody wanted to ask the Fury’s anything unless they had wanted to be ridiculed like Clint Barton.

“It doesn’t matter,” Jason interrupted, an attempt at keeping the conversation flowing. “because all that matters is that I’m finally going to be paired up with Dot—”

“Actually,” Dot gently cut in, giving Jason a sheepish smile. “Damian and I are already paired up.”

“WHAT?!” Jason’s voice carried over the fences, causing heads to turn. Not all the heads belonged to the group.

Dick hissed, “Keep your voice down! You’re going to give up our hiding spot!” he warned because as everyone knew, the starting zone wasn’t exactly the safest spot for any of them. There was and will be much discussion about the order of how everyone teamed up but for Dot’s sake, it was passed on when Bruce agreed with Dick.

“The teams are already made up,” he clarified. “Dick and Jason. Tim and Duke. Dot and Damian.”

“That’s a load of bull—” Jason was starting to say, not one to immediately give up his grievances if he thought it could give him his way.

Damian was holding Dot’s hand, giving Jason a smug expression. Jason was inches away from knocking it off but he didn’t want to look bad in front of Dot—whom everyone had been desperately trying to impress. “Mother said she would feel comfortable with me,” he gloated and he was half-right. Damian was a child by regular standards and Dot just naturally sided with them. It was something that dawned on Jason right away. It showed on his face, looking just as smug as Damian.

“Because you’re a fucking child. No wonder.”

Damian jutted his lower lip out, kicking Jason in the shin. There would have been a brawl in the middle of the starting zone if Bruce hadn’t interrupted.

“There’s a strange anomaly that’s showing on the map ahead of you guys, is everything alright?”

“Aside from Jason and Damian?” Dick chuckled, raising two fingers towards his ear to secure his earpiece, “we’re fine. We’re about to move on.”

“Be careful,” Bruce was warning, “Take another look around. Something seems off.”

No one could understand what Bruce was saying or worse yet, what he might have been seeing. Eyes scanned the area in front of them; they were in the backyard of some old abandoned suburban house. Ultron’s clones had long ago ran off any human who might have lived in the neighborhood and it looked as deserted as—

“Mmm, I appreciated that little murmuring you did in my ear.” Jason all but purred, turning his red helmet to look over at Dot. She looked as bewildered as any one else in the party.

“…That wasn’t me, love.” Dot admitted, a little worried about what Jason had heard and where he had heard it from. Jason’s head jerked back, looking between the group to see if this had been a weird joke.

“You just didn’t whisper into my comm right now?”

“No, dude. If she did, we would have ALL heard it…” Duke said. This much was true; all of their commlinks were connected so even if Dot had whispered something in Jason’s ear (like he had wanted), everyone would have been privy to it.

“What did this voice say?” Tim asked, looking towards Jason with concern.

“Did it say you’re a dumb ass?” Damian asked.

“That’s not fucking funny—”

“What the hell is that?” It had been Dick that had pointed towards a figure across the yard, standing absolutely still and just watching the group interact. Everyone’s heads turned, eyes drawn towards the mysterious figure that dwelled at the beginning of the yard, almost on the other side of the neighbor’s fence. There had been a break in the wooden pillars, and despite the area being deserted, there had been that lone person just watching them.

“Have they been there all this time?” Dot whispered, tucking Damian closer. But Damian was the one who pushed Dot behind his smaller body, preparing to take care of her just like his older brothers were planning on doing. “It doesn’t look like a clone.”

“…No, not at all. It’s kind of creepy,” Tim agreed in a hushed whisper. All of them had the sudden understanding or perhaps a warning built in them that told them not to speak too loudly. Not to draw attention to themselves. Not even Jason wanted to raise his voice to a yelling pitch he’d usually use on people who unnerved him.

But this was just too much.

“This had to be the weird thing Bruce saw on the scanner,” Dick murmured, still perplexed about this figure and the disembodied voice Jason had heard in his ear. “Let’s go…”

It was a strange sensation, pulling away from the yard to cut through the abandoned house and to end up on the other side where the figure had been waiting on the opposite end of the street. It caused everyone to stop in their steps.

“What… the fuck…” Jason so eloquently put.

“I think we better get out of this neighborhood fast.” Duke agreed in a more articulate sense. “I hate to sound like those old guys, uh, Steve and Chris, but i’m not getting any good vibes about this.”

Dot nodded in agreement, her own Mama Bear protective urges surging forward to turn the boys around and perhaps go down an alleyway. It sounded bad but it was in the opposite direction of where this mysterious figure had been standing.

The many bootsteps of Robins and Dot’s little feet pattered against the concrete as they took off in a brisk stride. There was no walking this day. Down the alleyway they went, past many houses they couldn’t recognize, many landmarks they couldn’t distinguish. The whole neighborhood seemed to pass by a blur which was okay with all of them; the more distance they put between themselves and that weird… thing, the better.

“Where did you guys go?” Bruce asked suddenly.

It caused a few of the Robins to jump though Tim was the one who answered, “We’ve been here all this time. Were our comms not picking up?”

“Negative.” Bruce clarified, “It was static. Did you see anything about that anomaly—”

Bruce went to static again and by this time, it had dawned on Dot why—for a person who played a little too many horror games, it could only mean one thing. As Dot swept her gaze around, lo and behold, that… thing was standing right across from them. It was always at a distance where it looked like a mere humanoid shape, unable to tell any features, all in black and seemingly very tall if it looked tall from a distance. It was unnerving. Unnatural.

“We got to get out of here,” Dot said, causing the boys to draw their gaze to where she had hers.

“Oh, what the fuck?” Jason cursed again, not short on sharing the enthusiasm of bewilderment between all of them. For some reason, it had never occurred to the group to use the weapons they had with them but perhaps that was why they hadn’t. There might have been something interfering just like with the commlink to Bruce.

The group spun on their heel, anxious to give themselves as much room away from that thing as possible. Everywhere they went, it seemed to follow. Always at a distance away. An air of anxiousness seemed to drift along with it but perhaps that was the group, tense about such a strange occurrence and unable to escape its clutches. The city soon turned into a maze with Bruce coming in and out of communication intermittently. Alleys and shops became obstacles, they soon got turned around and Dot felt like it was a horrible cheapened version of Silent Hill. She panted at the side of a building, holding onto it as she tried to catch her breath.

“I fucking hate this,” she gasped. “Why is it following us? This has never happened in the rigs before.”

“It’s just our luck we’ve be the first ones to experience it,” Dick tried to joke, giving Dot a comforting rub on the back to help her catch her breath and perhaps soothe her. She straightened and gave him a thankful smile. He returned it and also added, “Don’t worry. I’m sure Bruce has something in mind. He has to have some kind of idea what we’re dealing with.”

“Yeah, like if we’re in any trouble at all,” Duke said.

Dot wanted to believe in their words and because they had sounded so sure, so confident, and believed in Bruce so much, she could believe it. But as she drifted her gaze towards the shadowy figure that had been trailing them from a distance, it just seemed hopeless.

After she had caught her breath, they ran off again. Twisting and turning, until they ended up in someone’s backyard once more.

“AW MAN, IS THIS WHERE WE STARTED?!” Jason asked throwing his arms up in frustration. By now, he didn’t care if he shouted to the heavens and that thing ate his face. He was tired of being terrorized by it. Tim and Duke were leaning on each other, breathing heavily, deeply. Robin had been leaning his forehead against the wall, also trying to catch his breath. Damian and Dot were huddled close, Damian being the little protector he was had been insistent that Dot stay behind him—she humored him but the first sign something was going down, Damian better believe she’d throw herself in danger before he had the chance to.

“It looks like it,” Dick sighed, patting his chest as a slight cough came from his throat. “If this is someone’s idea of a joke, I’m going to batarang them in the legs and hopefully off a roof.”

Jason pointed, “That’s my idea of fun.”

Dick gave Jason a rueful smile through his mask before looking around. As expected, that figure was on the opposite end of their position. Standing just inside the neighbor’s yard, on the otherside of the broken fence.

Jason grimaced, mad. Angry. Upset. He’s an angry boy and he didn’t like to be pushed around. The family was honestly surprised he lasted so long but that might have been the influence of this thing, swaying their emotions, steering or clouding their judgement. But Jason, his judgement hadn’t always been the best. He decided to use the weapons they had on them as if realizing they had been there for the first time.

“Jason, don’t…” Tim warned, pushing off Duke. “you don’t know what’s going to happen.”

“If it can bleed, I know what WILL happen.” Jason threatened, both pistols raising up like the crazed pitched tone in his voice.

Before the first bullet had the chance to exit its chamber, there had been another explosion; a dark armored SUV came barreling out of the side of the yard, completely running over the black figure as it stood in its spot.

Katherine Kane, also known as Batwoman, kicked her driver’s door open and stepped out, looking as heated as Jason. She looked around before spotting her family on the otherside of the fence.

“Where is it?” she demanded, “I’m going to kick its ass.”

The group of Robins gaped and Dot was more inclined to admire the kickass entrance. Kate spent no time marching right up to the boys and pushing past them to personally rescue Dot herself. She knelt down, making sure the most coveted woman in the Haushold had been unharmed. Hands on her face and all over her body, she made a thorough job of searching.

“What is it?” she asked, still having no answer for the strange happenings that surrounded the party. “What caused you guys to go dark? Is it another stupid ass clone? I’ll beat it up if the boys can’t handle it.”

Jason just about bristled, “I WOULD HAVE HANDLED IT IF YOU DIDN’T JUST RUN IT OVER WITH THE BATMOBILE!”

Kate turned towards the SUV version of a Batmobile. Then she looked back at Jason, then the boys down the line. There was something disappointing in her face but she didn’t remark on it. She’d probably wait to tease the boys about it later but at the moment, she knew that they were overdue to be home. She jerked her head, sending the boys on their way, “Come on, we’re going home.”

And Kate had the pleasure of being Dot’s knight in shining armor, carrying her to the SUV like a knight carrying the princess to her steed.

[danniburgh]

EPISODE 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 I HAVE MANY THOUGHTS AGAIN

PAUL’S HAIRRRRRRR

dude the aesthetic of this episode is everything for me

UGH SO DOMESTIC BUYING FURNITURE

PAAAAAAUL’S HAIRRRRRRRRRRRRR

omg the glitches remind me so much of matrix it’s just amazing

lmao the backgrounds really look fake, like maybe it was intentional

VISION MAKING DAD JOKES I REPEAT VISION MAKING DAD JOKES!!!!!!!!!!!!

the speed of the pregnancy reminds me of fucking twilight 🥴🥴

BILLY AND TIMMY?? oh do you mean WILLIAM KAPLAN AND THOMAS SHEPARD?????? OR WICCAN AND SPEED?????

the fact that the belly is not even disguised it just looks fake and we love to see it BECAUSE IT IS BECAUSE ITS ALL FAKE

VISION FUCKING LOOKED AT THE CAMERA PLEASE TELL ME YOU SAW THAT

AND THE GLITCH?????????????? VISION STARTING TO GET HYPERAWARE AND WANDA JUST ERASING IT?????? FUCUUUUUUK

canon: vision floats when he’s nervous

CAN WE TALK FOR A MINUTE ABOUT THE HYDROSOAK: it’s shaped like the tesseract, it is literally a version of the tesseract and it’s making me think two things, the first, is it just a direct reference to avengers one or it has yet another meaning? what does the goddess mean??? 

“a small town is hard to escape” the doctor said to vision and he just took it, he just said yes. Let’s try to think about this for a sec, vision is a making of wanda’s imagination OR, as we saw on the final minute of the episode, is a reproduction made by sword, or by someone else? ill talk about this later

MENTIONING PIETRO: “i am a twin”, wanda just went at it. We had so much time without her mentioning her twin brother, the way almost all the mcu movies after civil war just robbed us a bit of her just having the memory of her brother by just feeding us with her romance with vision, the creators of the show knew she needed that and knew WE needed that, it almost feels like closure. Also: the way the music cut, the way the camera worked on wanda’s and geraldine’s faces, the way geraldine mentioned ULTRON (voice deep, eyes low) like... fuckkkkkkk. i actually screamed

SOKOVIAN SONG, SOKOVIAN LULLABYE!!!!!!

uhm, you’re laughing? Geraldine is most likely a SWORD agent posing as Wanda’s friend to try to get her back to reality and YOU’RE LAUGHING?

Herb: “they’re...” WATCHING, they’re watching, but who’s they? for fuck sake im so confused

can we comment on the way the camera angle widened when wanda got closed to geraldine to expel her out of her reality? CAN WE TALK ABOUT THAT??????

so, we all saw the end, right??????? like.......... FUCK, its enclosed, the city is enclosed, and now i go back to the “a small town its hard to escape” thing of it all, and to the backgrounds getting somehow faker... its all just a big production???? we can even go back to the radio scene with the “what are they doing to you wanda?” BECAUSE WHAT IF ITS NOT EVEN SWORD THAT IS HOLDING WANDA CAPTIVE INSIDE HER OWN MIND AND ALSO INSIDE A HUGE ARMY GUARDED PRODUCTION SET LETTING HER HAVE HER WAY IN HER OWN MADE REALITY TO GET SOMETHING FROM HER, WHAT IF IT’S A BRANCH OF HYDRA???? WHAT IF THAT’S WHY WHEN WANDA PUSHED GERALDINE OUT OF THE REALITY FABRIC THEY ALL CAME TO HER LIKE THAT?????, it’s all coming together, fellas.

I told y’all last week that agnes has meaning, didn’t I? well, im 65% sure she’s working for the same people that’s holding wanda captive... like, now, after seeing that ending my theory that she’s trapped inside some facility and all the “neighbours” work for the organization that’s keeping wanda inside, but also there’s others that are infiltrated to try to rescue wanda when she doesn’t even wanna be rescued is GETTING STRONG

i love cliffhangers as much as the next person but i hated being left out of it like that, fuck you marvel i love you so much

tune in next week for my thoughts on this show thats making me lose my marbles!!!! 🥰🥰🥰, thanks for all the notes 💓💓

I WATCHED WANDAVISION EP 1 AND 2 AND I HAVE THOUGHTS

needless to say: SPOILERS

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I ADORE the aesthetic of the first episodes, i love that they even did the accents the tv stars had at the time

THEY ACKNOWLEDGE THAT SHES FROM SOKOVIA THATS JUST STRAIGHT AWESOME

the references in the comercial breaks had me screaming, I'll elaborate:

the toaster: MADE BY STARK INDUSTRIES!!!!!!! is it a direct reference to what wanda may see as the cause of her parents death? is it a reference to her "toaster boyfriend"? is it both?

the watch: STRIKER????? HYDRA????? ALSO WORDPLAY "HYDRA IS WATCHING" like damn lady, also i loved the slight mysoginy of that add

i need to say that almost all the analysis I'm making is based on my experience with desired realities, daydreaming and a bit on my obsession with memory

in ep 1 when ms hart keeps saying "stop it" and she's looking at wanda rather than her husband can be interpreted as Wanda's conscience telling her to fix it, so she gets vision to do it instead because in her mind he's the only one that can

also: when the harts ask them where are they from and when did they meet and how long theyve been married wanda was just so confused and scared and i think it was because when she was creating that reality she didn't think of those small details, there's a lot in the dialog that you can get if you keep in mind that most probably everything it's fake

oh God I just love vision being all over the place trynna beat the Google authentication box

VISION DRUNK ON GUM I REPEAT VISION DRUNK ON GUM

don't you just love paul bettany?

from the first moment they said "for the children" i was like "welp, she's preggo", it was almost as if by just doing the repetition of that phrase she self inserted the idea of babies in her mind and that's why the bump appeared so suddenly

the whole sequence of the talent show can be also read/seen as how wanda is basically running the show, she's pulling the strings and fixing the details of her makeshift reality to fit in it and make it as close to her idea as she can.

on that same note: I'm 76% sure that the reason of her making this family sitcom/cheesy crafted/white picket fences reality it's because when she and vision wanted to be together and settle in they only had 3 star hotels and open 24 hour diner dates, she never had the chance to actually live a normal life with him as she would've wanted so she's creating it now

dude also the title of the fucking show lmao im just going all out with this train of thought: wandavision it's their names yes but also may be because all of this it's just a vision that wanda has of what might've been if he was still there with her??????

I'm still thinking about that freaking red helicopter WHATS GOING ON IS THAT JUST A LITTLE GLIMPSE OF REALITY? IS ANOTHER REALITY LEAKING INTO THE ONE WE ARE WATCHING?

can we talk about agnes for a sec?? shes so cute and sassy i love her, I'm pretty sure she has meaning

wanda really said ✨no✨ on the sewer man, he was in color as well as the red helicopter, which makes me think that, as in the end of episode one with the tv on the desk and the voice on the radio, they're keeping eyes on her, they're trying to get inside to see what is she doing and what, I'm still wondering why the man was dressed as a bee keeper... is it maybe a costume? a cover?

can we also talk about the slight change in music and overall camera work when glimpses of out-of-wandas-reality come about?????? it just changes the mood, the vibe, i can see they might have even used a different camera, different lighting and different techniques because its very unsettling, it's the visual way to tell us that something it's just wrong and make us as upset as wanda feels

THE COLOR TRANSITION WAS SO GOOD AND THEY LOOKED SO CUTE ALL DRESSED UP IN THEIR COLORS

holy shit elizabeth olsen you gorgeous angel

i loved every second of it I can't wait to watch more 🥺🥺🥺

[essayofthoughts]

Anon who sent in the prompt regarding Wanda going to Uni...

I don’t think you have a good grasp of who and how MCU Wanda is, at least with regards to how I characterise her in my fics. I do think she believes firmly in the importance of education, I don’t think she’d go into full time study or education. I also don’t think she’d just make friends. 

With Pietro she was incredibly codependent so for one, the grief is gonna be tied up with a whole other unhealthy kettle of fish. For two, she has serious trust issues what with HYDRA, what with Ultron, what with having to work with Stark and then exacerbated by Pietro - her brother, who always tried to keep her safe - being dead.

Her ability to trust people is dependent on if she thinks they’re a threat or not and if she cares to engage. Clint owes her a debt (her brother died for him) and also wants to see her well (he carried Pietro to a lifeboat so he wouldn’t implode with the city, so she could bury him, I go with the hints in CACW and whats been said in interviews to say that Wanda is welcomed at the Barton farm). Steve offered her and Pietro trust when he didn’t have to. Vision is Vision and saved her life when, honestly, I don’t think she expected anyone to come for her. I think, by that point, having taken her vengeance, she’d given up entirely.

Wanda has a reason to trust these people and think that they mean her well. There is no way that meeting some rando mundies is gonna evoke that kind of trust or friendship. She’d be doubtful that they’d understand. Plenty of them would probably make comments about her accent. She’d be alone without her brother there, and that would have an impact on her certainty and her confidence for months.

Even if she decided to get counselling (and I’m kinda inclined to believe that with Sam as part of the Avengers counselling became mandatory for all of the Avengers) I don’t think she’d let brand new friends be waiting for her outside. I get counselling. I don’t like seeing people I know immediately afterwards because it can be draining, it can mean lots of thinking and when you emerge you may well still be emotional, tired, or chewing over things that were discussed.

Further, as I’ve said above, Wanda has trust issues. I don’t think she’d be very good in counselling until she’s built up that ability to trust again. Especially with the cut “Flowers in the Attic” comment, it’s meant to be clear that many people read the twins’ dynamic as incestuous (I personally don’t think it ever was or ever would have been) and I think she’d be incredibly insulted by such an insinuation and here comes the reminder that she can read people’s minds. It’s not impossible that even if a counsellor has the tact to not say anything she accidentally spots it in their mind and leaves

And honestly... Wanda isn’t the wallowing type. She doesn’t like having to act, to fight, to battle. But she understands the necessity of it - for their only chance at vengeance, to save the world, to protect people. This is how Marvel’s balanced her sheer power level to make sure that she doesn’t just get fed up and squish Stark with her scarlet - because she could, she very much could.

Wanda, after AOU, would grieve. She would lock up into herself for a good while. I posit, in Driving for Many Hours, that Clint gets her away from the Avengers and gives her time and space to process without leaving her utterly alone, which would keep her anchored. And I think, after that, she would simply pull herself up, and begin to work forwards. She’d still be grieving, she’d still have issues, but she’d be functional and I think that’s what she’d be content with. I don’t think she’d be ready or willing to completely finish grieving or go talk to someone who’d want her to dig into the full and messy nature of the twins’ codependency.

I think she’d throw herself into her training so she doesn’t have to think on other things, and spend time socialising with Vision - the other utterly-new, the other very-different of the team. I think she gets some degree of counselling but as part of an Avengers thing - not grief focussed but trauma focussed and that doesn’t push at her trust issues.

I’m sorry, I just can’t see Wanda going to Uni and making friends like that. That isn’t Wanda. She can get along with people, sure, but she isn’t inclined to just let them in like that, to trust them so. I don’t think she’d get counselling because acquaintances she’s met by chance and who barely know her “help her realise” she needs counselling. I think she’d get it because Clint suggests that maybe it’ll help with her nightmares, or because Steve says he thinks it’ll help them be stronger as a team. Either so she can sleep at night - and therefore do better in the team - or for the sake of the team. I think after the total balls-up that was Ultron, that she wouldn’t want to act directly for herself, I think this is also why she doesn’t act immediately in CACW. Because she knows that when she acts - in AOU for herself, in CACW against Crossbones to try to save people - she still inevitably fucks up.

And I think she fears that, and I think she’d do stuff to try to prevent that. But not for herself. Because on a fundamental level she’s still fucked up by Pietro’s death and she isn’t ready to dig into the tangled level of codependency and unhealthy dynamics they shared because to her that would feel like a betrayal of who and how they were, of their incredibly intimate level of trust.

How can she grieve her brother as she disavows him, as she says “No, I know this was unhealthy”? So she doesn’t acknowledge it. She goes on with her life, with her grief, because she’s not at a place where grief counselling will help. She needs other things to do, other things to build her life around, and for her that’s the driving purpose of the Avengers, that’s the acoustic guitar we see in her room, that’s talking to Vision and visiting the Bartons and the small child named in part for her brother. For Wanda’s particular mess of stuff, she need-wants to take some time to give herself her own place, apart from her brother, before she can start delving into the grief and then - and only then - the unhealthy aspects of the dynamic. And given her telepathy, I think she’s aware that she might see thoughts she doesn’t wish to, of people understanding her and Pietro wrong, and I think she dreads that and no amount of convincing from people who - so far as she is concerned - do not  understand, is going to make her.

I hope this makes sense? If you want a “Wanda goes to uni” fic, send in a prompt like that, but I’m afraid your long submit-prompt doesn’t work with how I characterise Wanda.