#i mean boy's been missing for like 8 MONTHS
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noona-clock · 2 days ago
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Heart of the Ranch - Part 8, Final Chapter
Genre: Cowboy!AU, Slice of Life, Fluff
Pairing: Namjoon x You (Female!Reader)
Warnings: None
Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 | Words: 3,298
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A Few Months Later
When you realized that your hand was resting on the inside handle of the car door as your rideshare drove up the graveled road toward BTS Ranch, you had to laugh softly to yourself.
Today, you were ready to open the door at a moment's notice because you could barely wait a moment longer to see a certain handsome cowboy (something he wasn't particularly fond of being called, by the way), but a few months ago it had been because you could barely wait to get out and check your phone for any work notifications you'd missed on the flight.
It's funny how things can change so quickly, isn't it?
Your heart jumped up into your throat as the car approached the house, and when you saw Namjoon step out onto the porch, an anxious smile curved your lips. You were good-anxious to see him since it had been several weeks since your last visit here, but you were still nervous-anxious because... Namjoon still made you nervous-anxious like that. Not particularly in a bad way. Just in a 'I've only been dating this person for a few months' kind of way, y'know?
Anyway.
The second the car stopped in front of the house, you pulled on the handle, pushed the door open, and sprang out of your seat.
Your eyes connected with Namjoon's as you jogged over to him, your heart skipping a beat as a wide grin appeared on his lips -- and dimpled his cheeks.
He held his arms out as you approached, and when you practically threw yourself into those strong, familiar, comforting arms, he wrapped them around you so tightly that it almost hurt to breathe. But boy did it feel wonderful.
"I missed you," he murmured as he buried his face in your hair. "Ten weeks is too long to go without seeing you."
"Ten weeks?!" you laughed. "It's been four and a half!"
Trust me, you'd been keeping track.
"Well, it felt like ten. Felt like ten months, actually."
His words made you beam and squeeze his neck tighter.
But then you pulled back just enough to see his face, to grin and look him in the eye when you replied, "I missed you, too, cowboy."
Namjoon huffed with irritation, though he still captured your lips in a sweet yet hungry greeting kiss.
"I'm not a cowboy," he grumbled against your lips, as he always did when you called him a cowboy.
Before you could answer with your customary "You are to me," the driver of your rideshare beeped his horn. Both yours and Namjoon's heads swiveled to look, seeing the driver had already taken your luggage out of the trunk and was simply letting you know he was leaving.
"Thanks!" Namjoon called out, lifting one arm to wave.
You were hoping that your boyfriend would put his arm back where it had been and continue kissing you. So, when he did the opposite -- stepped away from you and let his other arm slide out from around your waist -- you couldn't stop yourself from letting out a whine of protest.
But really, you knew if Namjoon was cutting your reunion short, it was for a good reason: the ranch was busy.
So, you scampered after him, reaching out and holding onto his arm. "What do you need me to do?" you asked as he took the handle of your suitcase and began heading inside.
Namjoon slipped his arm out of your grasp but only so he could wrap it around your shoulders as the two of you strolled back to the house.
"I was in the middle of doing laundry if you'd like to help me with that," he told you before gently kissing your cheek.
"Aww, look at you," you grinned. "Asking me for help so easily!"
"I know, I'm practically a changed man," Namjoon chuckled.
"But in the best way possible," you assured him. "Just remember that you're not the only one who's changed around here."
As the two of you neared the steps of the front porch, Namjoon slowed to a stop and turned to face you. "What do you mean?"
"Well, first of all, I haven't taken this much time off of work... ever."
"True," he agreed.
"But also..." You lifted your arms and gestured all around you. "Look at this place! You have guests and you're not running yourself ragged!"
Namjoon tried to hide an incredibly pleased expression, but you knew how proud he was of the ranch. And then he leaned in, his nose just barely brushing yours. "We both have you to thank," he whispered.
You moved your hands to rest on his chest and whispered back, "I barely did anything. It was all you."
"Oh, please," Namjoon scoffed, and feeling his breath tickle your lips made you shiver. "That week you stayed here after your friends left basically changed everything. I mean, besides when you guys re-did my website and started my social media accounts and raised all that money to fix the fence and get the tree taken away."
"Yeah, all of that was nothing," you teased with a dismissive wave of your hand. "You're right, it was really all me and everything I did by myself for that one week."
Namjoon rolled his eyes good-naturedly and leaned in the last little bit to press his lips to yours quickly. "Come on, oh humble girlfriend of mine. Those towels won't fold themselves."
You simply chuckled softly, helping to lift your suitcase up the steps and following Namjoon inside.
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"Here you go," Namjoon murmured as he carefully set down a mug of steaming hot tea on a coaster next to you.
With a quick glance away from the computer screen, you thanked him and happily received his greeting kiss.
As he pulled up a nearby chair, you lifted your mug and sipped the strong but heavenly tea that you'd learned was the cook's secret recipe. It was strong, yes, but incredibly comforting and it had taken hardly any time at all for you to request a cup every single night.
"How is it looking?" Namjoon asked as he leaned toward you to peer at the computer screen.
But of course, you couldn't let an opportunity to see his dimples escape, so you answered by reaching up and gently squeezing his cheeks with your thumb and index finger. "Lookin' handsome," you said with a slight smirk.
Namjoon shrugged your arm away, and even though you knew he knew by now what your M.O. was when you answered his mundane questions with a compliment, he still smiled and gave you exactly what you wanted.
Satisfied, you turned back to the computer and said, "Not bad."
"Better or worse than when you were here last?"
"Definitely better," you assured him.
With a nod, Namjoon said, "I'll take it."
"What about bookings for the rest of the month and next?" you asked before taking another sip of tea.
"Last I checked, almost full," he told you, very obviously trying to tamp down a smile.
You didn't hide your smile and said, "See? We told you our plan would work."
"I never doubted --"
Your sharp look stopped Namjoon from continuing his sentence. Instead, he said, "I learned my lesson, don't worry. I will never doubt you again."
"Do you know how attractive a smart man who learns from his mistakes is?" you asked.
Despite the flush of pink blooming on his cheeks, Namjoon nodded toward the computer screen and asked, "Do you think I could hire another part-timer anytime soon? Or at least an accountant?"
His words immediately wrinkled your forehead in consternation. "You already have an accountant," you pointed out, trying not to sound too offended.
"Baby, I --" Namjoon cut himself off with a huff and lifted one hand to rest on the back of your neck, squeezing you there gently. "I can't keep asking you to do this for free. And I don't care if you're offering. You deserve to be paid, and if you won't take my money, I should find someone who will."
Honestly... you weren't sure how to feel. You could see his point -- it was one thing to implement the ideas you came up with, but it was another to utilize your professional skills without actually putting you on the payroll. But there was absolutely no way you would take his money! And there was also absolutely no way you would put his finances into the hands of someone else!
...A thought popped into your head, and even though it was a thought you'd acknowledged several times over the last few weeks, you didn't have time right now to voice it.
So, you simply said, "That can be put off for another time. The answer is yes, I think you can hire another set of hands."
And you would leave it at that. For now.
Namjoon nodded, moved to stand up, pressing a kiss to your temple on his way up, then murmured that he had to go get the cows into the barn for the night.
"Tell them 'Hi' for me," you called after him before turning back to the computer to finish up for the night. You knew the two of you would meet back up in Namjoon's room soon enough, so there was no need to say 'good night' just yet.
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Every single night you'd spent here during the last few months (excluding when you were a guest, of course), you had always gotten ready for and into bed before Namjoon joined you. No matter how much you nagged him to leave certain chores for the next day and turn in earlier, you were always the first one to turn down the covers for the night.
So, when you trudged up the narrow staircase to the attic-turned-bedroom and opened the door to hear Namjoon brushing his teeth in the en suite bathroom, you were both surprised.
Namjoon stuck his head out through the doorway, his brow wrinkled as he looked at you with an 'Everything okay?' expression.
Truth be told, you were nervous. You'd been sitting at the front desk, long after emptying your cup of tea, ruminating on that thought from earlier. You hadn't allowed the thought to settle any of the times it came to you previously, but now that you were back here at the ranch -- more specifically with Namjoon -- you figured it was time. It was time to stop and truly think about --
"It's late," Namjoon's voice interrupted your contemplative stupor, and you just now realized he had finished his nightly routine and left the bathroom to stand in front of you by the doorway.
"Yeah," you replied with an awkward chuckle. "I didn't realize."
Namjoon reached out to place his hands on your upper arms, his forehead still deeply wrinkled as he gazed at you. "...Everything okay?"
You replied with a nod before stepping up and sliding your arms around his waist.
"Look," he murmured, returning your embrace. "If this is about me hiring an accountant --"
"No," you interrupted. "...I mean, actually it is, but not how you think. Probably. I -- Let me get ready for bed, and then we can..."
"Sure," Namjoon agreed.
But before he could step away, you buried your nose in his shoulder, inhaling the scent you were so familiar with by now. You never would've guessed that the smell of pine would end up bringing you so much comfort, but here we are.
"I'll be quick," you whispered, and then darted into the newly vacant bathroom.
After haphazardly brushing your teeth, rushing through your skincare, and hurriedly changing into your pajamas, you made sure all of the lights in the room were turned off before shuffling over to Namjoon's bed.
He lifted the covers for you, one arm laid out across your pillow so you could immediately cuddle up against him.
And as soon as his arm wrapped around your shoulder, as soon as your head settled into the crook of his neck, he said, "Okay, what's going on?"
You let out a shaky breath and told yourself to just say it. There was no logical reason for you to be so nervous, and you would feel a lot better once it was all out in the open.
"I'm just wondering what my future looks like," you began, relieved to hear your voice was calm and steady. "Obviously, I can't keep taking time off to come visit, but I also don't want to bring work with me. I want to spend as much time with you as I can."
Namjoon simply hummed in agreement.
"So... I don't know, it sounds kind of crazy now that I'm about to say it out loud, but maybe I should --- maybe I could... "
Come on, Y/N, just rip the band-aid off and say it!
"Move here and help you run the ranch."
It took everything in you not to let out a huge sigh of relief.
But you had to admit, it did feel incredible to finally share that thought with someone else.
As the seconds ticked by, though, that incredible feeling began to wane because Namjoon wasn't saying anything.
Now, you knew him well enough by now to know that he frequently needed time to process things before he could respond.
But... I mean, if he had to think about this, the answer was probably going to be 'No' right? He wasn't ready for that yet. He didn't know the two of you were that serious yet.
So, you were about to assure him that it was just a thought, and you were more than fine to pretend like you'd never brought it up. You would say 'good night,' turn over so he wouldn't have to see your embarrassment, and then attempt to sleep.
But Namjoon spoke before you had the chance -- thankfully.
"You would do that?" he asked softly.
Well, it wasn't a 'No,' so you replied with a nod. "I would," you confirmed in a whisper.
After a few more seconds, Namjoon leaned back, forcing you to look at him. You couldn't quite make out his expression, honestly; it could've been one of surprise, confusion, or even a mix of the two.
"You... would pack up your whole life and leave the city and your job and your friends... to live at the ranch?"
Well, when he put it like that, no wonder he was surprised and confused.
"No," you amended. "I would pack up my whole life and leave the city and my job and my friends for you. You could be anywhere in the world, on this ranch or not, and that's where I'd want to be."
Namjoon searched your face, his gaze flitting about as if he was actually looking for something. And then he said, "Can I just ask you one question?"
"Of course."
He inhaled deeply before asking, "If I told you that I wanted to move to you, would you let me?"
Just as he had with your idea, you thought about it for a few seconds. But then you said, "Of course I would, if I thought that's what would be best for us."
"...So you don't think that's what's best for us?"
You shook your head and hummed negatively.
"Why not?" he asked, and you appreciated that his tone was anything but accusatory.
"Because you wouldn't be happy living in the city."
"And you would be happy living here?"
Okay, now you understood his line of thinking.
You moved your arm up between the two of you, resting your hand on his chest and locking your gaze on his. "Namjoon," you said softly. "I don't live in a big city because that's the only place I ever imagined myself living or because I'm used to the noise and lights or anything. I didn't move there because I wanted to, I just... ended up there. I got a job with a big company and found an apartment close to the office, and that was that. I followed the job, and that's exactly what I'll be doing this time, too. Of course, I love my job, but I guess it's really more accurate to say that I love my work. I've just gotten used to my job. But my job doesn't have you. And if I can do the work I love to do and be with you at the same time? Why wouldn't I jump at the chance?"
"But what about your friends?"
"Don't worry, I'm already devising an evil plan to get one or all of them to move here, too. That is -- if you'll have me," you told him. "But, for now, FaceTime and planes are there for us when we need them."
When he didn't reply for almost a minute, you added, "This place is your home. It's run you ragged the past few years, and I've never actually seen you anywhere else, but I just know. This is your ranch. You're the heart of this place, you belong here. I can't say the same about my apartment or my office. Of course, I love my friends, but we haven't always lived in the same place. We've been apart before, we can do it again. Our friendship is strong enough to survive anything. But... if I'm being honest, I'm afraid that I'm not strong enough to survive not being with you."
Maybe you were just imagining things, but it almost looked like Namjoon's eyes were... glassy? Almost like they were filling up with tears?
And when his lips curved into a derisive smile, and he murmured "Ah, shit," in a very watery voice, you knew that your eyes weren't playing tricks on you.
You had never been adept at comforting people, but it was very obvious that Namjoon had yet to feel comfortable crying in front of you. So, you removed your hand from his chest and scooted closer to him. You pressed your forehead into his neck and shoulder, slid your arm over and around his back, and held him closely.
He did the same, holding you to him like a lifejacket in a vast ocean.
After what seemed like an hour or two, but was in reality probably just a few minutes, Namjoon pulled away just enough to rest his forehead against yours.
"I love you," he whispered. "I love you so much, and every time you're here, I just feel so... this place feels so... I don't know, complete. It breaks my heart every single time you leave, even though I know you're coming back. I've wanted to ask you pretty much since the beginning if you could just stay here, I just didn't want to be selfish."
"So, does that mean you'll have me?" you asked with a grin, anticipation thrumming throughout your whole body. "I can become a cowgirl?"
Namjoon groaned, and you couldn't help but giggle as he rolled his eyes at you.
"I'll let you live here on one condition: you have to stop calling me 'cowboy.'"
At that, your expression dropped. "Really?" you asked forlornly.
After a second or two of searching your pitiful face, Namjoon let out a sigh. "No, not really. Just promise you'll let me keep pretending I'm irritated about it."
"Deal," you answered immediately, and you truly couldn't wait any longer to seal your promise with a kiss.
Before you could get completely lost in his lips, though, you inched away and whispered, "I love you, too."
And you knew right then and there, feeling his lips brushing against yours, feeling his hands coming up to cradle your cheek and brush your hair away from your face, that this was the beginning of the rest of your life.
And nothing could've made you happier.
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thaliasthunder · 2 years ago
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cant fucking believe i got a paragraph describing the color percy's literal boxers being shoved into my face but not one of him hugging sally w teary eyes after being missing for like 8 months ?????
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skitskatdacat63 · 1 year ago
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There's this nearly 4 hour movie I've been meaning to watch for a while and I was like "ah maybe ill watch it tonight hehe 🥰" and then I remember...quali is at 9 🫠
#i actually despise abu dhabi being the seaosn closer ngl#basically since Japan the race time has suited my timezone pretty well#1 am. 1 pm. 3 pm. 4 pm. 12 pm. 1 am.#<- like look at that. look at they absolutely delicious schedule#every race for the past 2 months has been at an ideal time and ive really settled into it#wow you mean i can sleep in on weekends and actually wnjoy the schedule!? oh boy!#and then they put fucking ad at the end which is at 8 am. who wants to wake up that early on a sunday#it would be fine if it was earlier in the season bcs during the middle i got pretty used to waking up before 9 bcs all the European races#but to have this one at thw end is literally horrible#its really down to timezones but fuck it really does bother me#bcs wow youve made me have zero desire to watch the season closer! thanks!!#id sooooo much rather brazil be the season closer still#like whh do you have to completely switch timezones right at the very end. its terrible#i think ill do waht i did last season and take a bit of a nap beforehand#it makes it much worse that this on a holiday wknd too. yeah bcs i rly wanna spend the last two days of my break waking up in the morning#sry im being ultra salty rn but i really dont wanna wake up for it but i hate missing race events UGHHHHHH#last yr i literally fell asleep during the first lap of AD 😭#yeah im concerned abt if nando will retain p4 or not but...waking up before 8 am...??#yeah idk i just rly dislike this scheduling#i actually kinda like AD as a track but its position in the season makes me resent it#catie.rambling.txt
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luviestarz · 1 month ago
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lee haechan fic recs! part 2 ❤︎
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note! : used all the old fics i could find that i enjoyed
❤︎ Love at First Bite…literally!? - @huangberryyy (Wherein Haechan finally gets the chick flick moment he dreamt of. Or wherein Haechan finally understands the appeal of being bitten by bitches.)
❤︎ the bet - @tyonfs (you and lee donghyuck created a bet that stated you two would have sex if he made the winning shot. now, you’re pinned up against the lockers, about to do the one thing best friends don’t do, and you definitely shouldn’t be wanting more.)
❤︎ Babe Watch [M]  - @milfgyuu (You and Haechan both have big plans this summer. You’re going to earn yourself a spot on the infamous Baywatch team and Haechan’s deadset on getting the girl. It just so happens that both your plans intersect quite nicely.)
❤︎ [8:02pm] - @nctsworld (in which a spontaneous dance in the kitchen with donghyuck sparks a revelation about how you feel about him.)
❤︎ beware the panty perv ♡ ldh x reader - @guanana (there’s a mystery at hand! it seems like your panties have been vanishing into thin air whenever you need them most? angry that your favorite pairs of panties are going missing, you decide to put on your detective hat in hopes of finding the mysterious lingerie bandit. but between all of the guys that you sleep with— you can’t seem to pinpoint who the culprit could be. it couldn’t possibly be your absolute geek of a tutor for calculus, right? nah.)
❤︎ september 19. - @hyucks-archive
❤︎ SURE THING (L.DH) - @domjaehyun
❤︎ young gods (l.dh) - @606fm (in the midst of committing felonies in the dark, lee donghyuck—your literal partner in crime and ride or die for life—manages to snag your heart in the process without you even realizing it. i mean, what the hell did you expect from seoul city’s most notorious robber?)
❤︎ [7:43am] - @aesthyuckic
❤︎ haechan is obsessed with you. - @haechurch
❤︎ the right one. (m) - @starryhyuck (donghyuck doesn’t like you going on dates with anyone else, especially lee jeno. you’re supposed to be his. and only his.)
❤︎ meow haechan using a lot of tongue meow meow  - @ofjunemoment (or: you’re thinking of getting a tongue piercing, but you’re not sure how haechan feels)
❤︎ attention - @pinkynana (gamer boys are the easiest target for you. they barely interact with any other woman so the moment you find out haechan was a gamer boy, you promised to sit on his lap any time he wanted to.)
❤︎ free falling - @sunpopz (your friend haechan has been acting kinda weird lately.. does it have anything to do with you? maybe it does, considering he keeps looking at you like you're gonna kill him any second. well, that and he randomly liked a three month old picture of you.)
❤︎ haechan — just for you (m) - @hyuckmov (because haechan thought you were irresistible when you were clever, if only because he knew he was the only one who could make your brain go empty.)
❤︎ Started With A Kiss - @sundaysundaes (Rookie actor, Lee Haechan, desperately wants to get the lead role in the highly anticipated upcoming TV drama. He’s sure he has what it takes to fill the part. Acting as a hero? No problem. Pretending to overcome his traumatic experience? Consider it done. A bed scene? Easy—wait, no. That might be a problem. But he should be fine as long as he gets to rehearse, right?)
❤︎ if I lose my mind - @slightlymore (you’ve never cared much for your dreams. they were always confusing nonsense you forgot in the morning. this until you started to have the same dream again and again and again: a lobby, pleasant elevator music in the background, many golden doors, a handsome young man welcoming you and asking where you wanted to go that night. his name was haechan and apparently you weren’t supposed to know that, let alone fall in love with him.)
❤︎ this is the story of how we fell in love, apparently. - @navyhyuck (running a youtube channel with your best friend isn’t easy, not when he’s like a ticking time bomb that’s constantly bubbling up something new. what’s worse is that you’ve had a crush on him for the past three years.)
❤︎ face sitting - @haetkeeper
❤︎ pervert (M) - @haechannielove (you confront haechan on his disgusting and constant objectification of you.)
❤︎ Pearlescent - @d-nghy-ck (A shoreline sunset spent cozied up against Hyuck dives deep past surface level. His lips profess his heart’s intent; his eyes reflect waves dancing in iridescent glimmers; his love whispered into your skin evokes heated passion.) 
❤︎ i love it, starboy - @staargirlblog (slight yandere! idol! haechan x fangirl! reader)
❤︎ college boyfriend!haechan - @lvlyynim
❤︎ perv!haechan - @4everhyucks
❤︎ My Boy. - @prodbymaui (A series of failed relationships and you were this near of giving up on love. But then here comes little Donghyuck and his persistence. Maybe-- he was the one fated to you, after all.)
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kquil · 4 months ago
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POLY MARAUDERS | HEROES IN TATTOOS PRT.8
08 : TONIGHT
CHPT. SUM. : you finally get to call them yours and they finally get to call you theirs and it's amazing! but something's missing...and it absolutely has something to do with the ache between your legs! 
LENGTH : 6.1k
TAGS. : very suggestive chapter ; boys and reader being horny for each other ; but do we blame them? no. we. don't! ; james being a pest ; sirius being a hot biker ; remus being a gentleman ; reader being a brat ; remus not being a gentleman anymore ; prologue to nsfw chapter
← PREV. : 07 | APOLOGIES & COMFORT | SERIES M.LIST
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You don’t know what you expected when the boys slowly began integrating you into their already-established relationship. In the beginning, you were worried about feeling like an outsider. From what they’ve shared with you, the boys have been best friends since their secondary school years, meaning that their history with each other was deeply rooted and you were intimidated, to say the least. You’re just a simple girl they helped protect from a creep a year or so ago. You couldn’t possibly stack up to the type of love they have with each other.
This was a reasonable insecurity to have, the boys understood that and were always there to reassure you of its negligible influence. And when their words weren’t enough, they happily showered you in affection, from loving kisses to warm embraces. They flirted shamelessly, left lingering touches scorched along your exposed skin and pulled you into kisses that ranged from feather-light to deeply passionate, they were eager to kiss and squeeze that vulnerability away until it no longer remained in your beautiful eyes. And you appreciate them so much for their efforts.
Not a second goes by when you don’t feel loved by them, or underappreciated. The love you reciprocated, although much softer and, somewhat, apprehensive, always made them melt into your arms. It was quite the trial considering how much bigger these men were compared to you. But you didn’t mind. Their warmth and weight against you only reinforced the realness of the situation, your situation, your relationship.
This was a dream come true – the best-case scenario for the mounting love you were amassing for each of the three tattooed and pierced men working at the parlour. If you told yourself this would be the outcome months ago, you wouldn’t have believed your ears.
“You’ve got that starry look in your eyes again, dollface,” Sirius chuckles as he presses a loving kiss to your fluttering eyelids, “what are you thinking? Hmmm?” The tattooist currently had you in his lap, disregarding the clock face on the wall. He was supposed to be preparing for a client who would be arriving soon but, instead of being a responsible tattooist, he had himself preoccupied with you.
“Sirius, you’ve got a client coming soon,” you pout, appearing more stressed over his appointment than he is.
As dramatic as always, Sirius put on a big show of missing you, his arms flailing about with his voice fluctuating in his theatrics, “But I’m feeling very deficient in vitamin ‘you’, sweetheart! I need to get my necessary second dose,” you roll your eyes at his playfulness and quietly argue about how this wasn’t his second dose.
“Rather, it’s been your fourth or fifth dose already,” giggling, you endeavour to kiss his pout away before trying to leave so he could have the time to prepare for his appointment while you caught up on your university assignments. Next thing you know, he has you nestled into his lap with your coursework papers set aside and your laptop closed shut. All your attention needed to be on him; he wanted it all.
“We have eight minutes,” he wagered deviously.
You’ve come to find out that Sirius was pretty spoiled when it came to affection. The distinction becomes even more apparent when you compare him to Remus and James. Thankfully, that translated into Sirius happily initiating affection as much as he pleads for it. He’s just this handsome, broad man with the most beautiful grin and the prettiest grey eyes separated by his perfect nose – he’s irresistible, really. And you know that he knows it too; all he has to do is pull those puppy-dog eyes and he gets anything and everything he wants. It’s almost frustrating how he wins your favour each time but you never regret giving into him.
No. Never for Sirius.
…Or Remus. Or James. God, you love these men so damn much!
“Doll?” he tilts his head adorably, a habit he’s picked up from the personified golden retriever himself – James.
“It’s nothing,” you hum, combing your fingers through his hair and pressing a kiss to his slightly scratchy jaw. His stubble was growing out ever so slightly and began to cast a light shadow across the lower half of his handsome face.
“Can’t be nothing,” he protests, delivering a loving nuzzle into the crown of your hair, “are you falling for me?~ Tell me the truth, beautiful girl,” he’s as playful as ever, an expert in heating up your cheeks for his own entertainment, “I know you’re shy but you’re also very honest, hmm?” you don’t respond and keep your focus trained on the rose tattoo creeping up his neck, with its expertly shaded thorns and petals. “I might just give you a reward if you’re honest with me,”
With a small smile, you peek up at him from beneath your lashes. The shadows they cast over your vision distract from the obvious pink hue exploding across his cheeks as soon as he catches your gaze, god! Could you get any more beautiful? You need to stop looking at him like that but also, please keep looking at him and never look away again! “I’ve already fallen for you, Sirius Black,”
Sirius’ jaw goes slack as his playful demeanour collapses under you. The prettiest smile he’s ever seen stretches across your plump lips, so kissable and laced with a shy playfulness he’s fallen in love with.
You drive him absolutely mad…
… and he loves it!
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James adores scooping you up into his arms. Not only is your resounding squeal the most adorable thing he’s ever heard but he just cherishes the feel of you tucked up in his embrace. For the first time, he fully understands the expression of describing one’s significant other as their whole world. Because when he has you giggling in his arms, clinging to his neck and nuzzling your face into the space under his jaw, James feels as though he’s got the entire world in his arms – he can accomplish anything and everything he sets his mind to. With you in his arms, he’s invincible; there’s a power that surges through him, a little like adrenaline but not quite so. It’s more powerful. He doesn't know what it is or how exactly to articulate its distinctions but he feels its fullness and capabilities like no other. He is the ruler of an empire, a conqueror with his perfect queen ruling beside him.
He is the leading character of a poignant Shakespearean play with you as his equally established partner. He is one half of a star and you are the other. Each is a ridiculous example but each also feels so fitting.
Of course… Only you could have ignited such an unfounded emotion within him.
“You feel it too, right Moony?” James whispers whilst he and the tall body piercer observe your happy movements gracefully puttering about their upstairs office, organising stacks of paperwork for them.
“Love?” Remus asks. It should be the obvious answer – you’re the protagonist of their conversation after all – but astute to James’ unique expressions for the natural and mundane, the brunette knows it’s going to be one of those times when James strongly feels a certain way and finds it hard to put into words. It makes Remus smile knowing that it’s about you – it’s surely something he can sympathise with James on.
“I guess but… it's different, somehow,” he doesn’t quite know how to articulate it, he just feels it. In his chest, in his fingertips, in his throat, in his stomach, even in his toes – he feels it everywhere. How could he not? Just looking at you, James can already justify that what he was feeling was perfectly admissible, whether he could put it into words or not. What he feels is true, it’s real and it gets stronger (almost achingly so) whenever he looks at you. The apple of his eye… never had an expression fit so well.
“I understand,” Remus voices after a deep, rumbling hum. His gaze soon turns to the tattoo artist beside him, fond eyes softening and stepping much closer to him, “I feel it too — for her and you, and Sirius,”
“That’s a given,” James grins boyishly up at his best friend and precious lover before he’s pulled into a loving kiss.
Tucking your chin a little over your shoulder, you glimpse the inviting image of your two lovers locking lips. It was heartening to see that their love for one another hadn’t changed because of your recent entanglement with them too. There was always a little corner of worry in your heart for potentially breaking their bond due to your interference.
The last time you let that same emotion control you, the aftereffects were explosive and unnecessarily wounding to all parties so you keep the emotion in check often, the boys too. But there was no complete dismissal of it. As much as you adore the boys and their love for you, you also adore their love for each other. It was incredibly inspiring to see what they had built together. Their parlour, their love, their quaint, shared flat.
But now, you also had the privilege of seeing them share more intimate acts of love and it was leading to a bad habit, a bad staring habit. So much so that you didn’t notice the two breaking away from each other until their devious smirks were solely directed at you.
“Care to join us, my dear?” Remus calls his voice like a hypnotising whisper, pulling invisible strings to shift your feet forward and lure you in. In no time at all, you’re close enough for the two to lock you between their strong, tattooed arms and finally launch their attack. You’re not complaining.
You’re so grateful to be able to join in their love and be with them like this. And you’re curious about what the four of you would end up building together one day. Rather than a small flat, maybe a house? A family? With kids? Fur-babies? A cat or dog? Maybe both? Regardless, one promise was absolutely certain: a happy life that’s bursting at the seams with love – it was a very compelling thought.
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Finally winding down for the night, you separate from the boys and remain tucked away in their neatly prepared spare bedroom. James and Sirius were proud to announce that they had tidied the place up for you; Remus would have contributed as well if it weren’t for him being the main man who handled the paperwork for the parlour.
You thanked the two for their thoughtfulness with a kiss but also kissed Remus for his hard work in ‘keeping their business alive’. It was a cheeky remark but one that got an adorable pout from James and Sirius along with a well-humoured laugh from the tall brunette himself. There was a love in his eyes that made you weak in the knees, his chocolate pools staring down at you, threatening to drown you in their warmth, his fingers ghosting the skin of your chin and ever so gently tilting your face to admire your features better. He moved as if he were propping up a delicate art piece, not wanting to press too harshly but enough to warrant a sensitive and lingering touch.
“You spoil us,” he utters as a heat blooms across your cheeks and a small peep pushes past your lips. Mistaking your incoherent squeak for verbal thought, Remus bends down at the waist with curious and furrowed brows, “What was that, my dear?” James and Sirius lightly snicker to themselves from the interaction. You would have scolded them for their childish behaviour if Remus didn’t have you melting into a puddle from doing absolutely nothing!
“I-It’s nothing, Rem,” thankfully, he didn’t need much convincing. Having him that close was intimidating – you just can’t believe that this beautiful, soft-spoken, loving and gentle giant of a man is yours.
The boys had allowed you to use the bathroom first and followed after you for their night routine. From where you sat at the vanity, you often catch yourself smiling and sometimes even giggling when you hear their antics echoing through the hallway. It was all very amusing and you had to bite your lip when thoughts of normalising this scenario into a nightly routine materialised in your head. It was still early on in your otherwise unconventional relationship and you didn’t want to risk anything. An eagerness for more was healthy but over-eagerness wouldn’t be worth potentially commencing an accelerated rate of negative interactions.
Going through your nightly skincare, you hum a soft tune to yourself. It felt like you were at your own flat, getting ready for bed as if it was any other night and the familiarity was surprising. You didn’t feel out of place at all despite the new environment. Although, you wouldn't expect anything less from your boys. They really knew how to make you feel welcome. At least you know that you’ll be sleeping restfully tonight.
“Almost ready for bed, Angel?” James’ sudden appearance in the doorway makes you tense before playfully pouting at him, especially when he has the gall to giggle at your startled reaction, “Awww~ don’t be like that, love~” he coos, walking up to stand behind your seated form. He, too, bends at the waist to kiss behind your ear and trail loving pecks down your neck to the slopes of your shoulder.
“My night routine is meant to be relaxing, Jamie,” you huff but he can hear the smile in your voice and looks up with his beautiful eyes, meeting your gaze in the vanity mirror. Slowly, he pulls his lips away from your exposed shoulder.
With a devilish smirk, he brings his lips to your ear and whispers, “I can help you with that…” You feel his feathery touch tracing the curves of your waist, coming up from your hips, “Relaxing, I mean~”
“James!”
He throws his head back with a laugh that makes his shoulders shake and his pretty curls bounce ever so slightly. He’s risen to his full height now and resists the urge to caress the skin of your cheek, respectful of your freshly applied skincare — he’s had to put up with Sirius’ grumbles and whines after mistakenly kissing his still dewy, moisturised cheek on previous nights. And James wouldn’t want to ruin your first night here like that. He’s no amateur. Instead, James concedes to caressing your hair and placing a loving kiss onto your crown. He loves the combined smell of your hair products and natural scent. It’s solely you; a fragrance that could never be contained in a bottle, which is, both, a pity and a relief. A pity that he can’t carry a small bottle around whenever he’s missing you horribly bad. But a relief that something so intimate about you couldn’t be shared beyond him, Sirius and Remus. James would rather set the world ablaze before that ever came to fruition.
“Alright, my love, I’ll leave you be…” you begin to sigh in relief until, “-for now~”
“James!” you giggle sweetly, and he joins you not too long after, “You’re such a pest!”
He cackles adorably as he walks back to the door, making his exit swift and injury-free – he, just barely, evades your swatting hands. The two of you gradually allow your shared merriment to fade into a comfortable silence. You return to completing your skincare routine while James remains at the doorway.
From afar, the tattooist quietly admires your figure, elegant and so… so girly as you go through your nightly regime. It wasn’t a bad thing seeing your femininity shine through was refreshing. Sure, Sirius partook in the same self-care religiously, at the start of every day and the beginning of every night but you, with your cosy pyjamas, fuzzy slippers, panda ears headband and prettily laid out products, have James bewitched; entranced in the most blissful way. He likes seeing and observing you like this. So comfortable that there isn’t a single change in your routine; so comfortable that you’re humming to yourself; so comfortable that you look like you belong here. Truthfully, he’s wanted to ask you to move in for quite some time now but understands the importance of going at a steady pace and one that everyone agrees on.
You all finally have each other to call your own, that’s what truly mattered at the end of the day. So he holds himself back.
The routine you have is quite thorough so you’re not one to exclude your neck area or chest. As you adjust your clothes to prep your neck and chest area, James glimpses more and more of your skin each time. Naturally, his cheeks colour a soft pink while his thoughts are gradually consumed by all the things he wants to do to you — bending you over every piece of furniture in the flat, not discounting the walls or the carpeted floor, even atop and inside his beloved car. Every hot and crude detail is uncensored, the images that flash in his head are dangerously explicit and encompass you wholely. Your pleasure is his top priority. He’ll have you moaning in his ear, panting for breath as he goes faster, harder, whatever you want, as long as you keep singing for him. Singing until you’re screaming and reaching your peak over and over and over—
“The door locks, y’know,” James mentions casually, not surprising you as much this time. Although his random comment does make you raise a brow.
“Oh?” you apply your berry-flavoured lip mask and smile at him through the mirror with a hint of curiosity, “Okay, thank you for telling me, Jamie,” it still wasn’t clear to you what he was trying to get at with his casual but warning remark.
“Are you going to lock it for the night?” his question makes you stop for a moment, what was he trying to say? “I think you should lock it, angel… you don’t want any surprise visitors — it’s hard resisting you this long,” he had a teasing smile on his lips but there was a dark look in his eyes that made you shudder. That’s what he meant…
“A-alright,”
He pauses, appearing to contemplate something as he leans forward but ultimately decides against his earlier intentions and straightens his posture accordingly, “that’s my good girl,” you watch his sly smirk disappear from the vanity mirror. It takes you a few moments longer to return to your skincare routine.
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Sirius smirks at you with an amused glint in his eye, “do you want to sit on it?” he asks, his big hand gently patting the seat of his bike. Being able to see right through you and read your inner thoughts was one of Sirius’ many talents. It amazed you but also made your cheeks flush in embarrassment. Were you really that transparent and readable? To Sirius, you were, but that’s only because he’s grown to have a keen eye for you and your little quirks; he finds them adorable and adores being able to read your thoughts, so that he knows he’s catering to you well.
Your hesitation is obvious. It’s not like you haven’t ridden on his motorbike before; you’ve ridden on it plenty of times. However, it was usually with you seated behind Sirius. For a while, you contemplated whether or not it would feel different to be the actual biker. You didn’t know how to ride a motorbike so you were secretly hoping that Sirius would allow you to hop on after he did his routine motorbike maintenance. It was common to do these checks and services every 6 months, but because Sirius used his motorbike so often, he tracked the regular services based on the miles he covered. He’s already crossed 4000 miles so his bike was due for some maintenance already.
“Are you sure?” you ask in a voice that’s so soft and sweet, Sirius can’t help but temper his smirk into a warm smile.
“It’s safe, sweetheart, and I wouldn’t have offered if I wasn’t okay with it,” the bright grin you gifted him made Sirius question why he hadn’t thought to make such an offer sooner. It was clear that you were interested in his bike but he didn’t know whether or not he was deciphering your intentions correctly, until now. With a skip in your step, you make your way over as Sirius chuckles to himself.
You’re just too cute~
“Thank you, Siri,” you reach up to cup his jaw and gently guide him down to press a loving kiss against his cheek.
“Anything for you, Doll,” he kisses your cheek as well, just before you get the chance to pull too far away from him. Sirius then guides you onto his motorbike, offering to stabilise you with his hands on your hips as you get settled on the seat. With his strength alone, he takes the bike off his kickstand and straightens it from the back so that you can experience what it’s really like without the bike being slanted to the side. The tattooist is much taller than you and so you aren’t able to fully flatfoot your feet, instead your toes barely brush the ground. Seeing that you’re able to just swing your feet back and forth, a quiet giggle escapes you – music to Sirius’ ears.
“This is fun!” you cheer softly, still quite shy as you glance over your shoulder with a flutter of your lashes, meeting eyes with the inked-up biker, who was grinning brightly at you. His strong arms are on full display, tattoos and all, as he holds the bike straight and steady from behind. He’s dressed in a simple black tank top and loose grey joggers. It’s a style that James often wears around their flat but you’re not surprised that Sirius was able to pull off the look too. With a face like his, you can easily determine that he’d suit any style he tries on.
“Why don’t you try pretending you’re actually riding it by grabbing onto the handles,” he encourages, excited. Having James, Remus and you as his loves were heaven on earth, but being able to share one of his favourite hobbies and his beloved motorbike fostered a different kind of haven in his heart. It’s overflowing and shows easily in his voice.
“Okay!” eagerly, you lean forward to grasp onto the handles and, with a feverish buzz, pretend you’re actually riding the bike out on the road. From backpacking behind Sirius so often, imagining the shift in positions and being the actual biker was quite easy. What a thrill! No wonder Sirius makes up any excuse to be out on his bike.
Yes, you’re still stationary but it’s just too easy to imagine everything, from the wind in your hair to the adrenaline pumping through your veins, encouraged by the rapidly passing views on either side of you. A view of the seaside at sunset is very appealing but winding country roads also offer great scenery. You can hear your heartbeat rising to match your vision and you have to bite your lip to contain an elated laugh. There’s no need to embarrass yourself even more, especially with Sirius behind you.
So stuck in your pretending, you miss Sirius’ partially restrained groan of frustration from behind your leant-over figure, “Fuck. Me…” he has the perfect view of your ass. And when you’re bent over his bike like this, his joggers tighten up around his crotch alarmingly fast. Never mind that the joggers were already very loose-fitting, he can’t help himself when you’re offering him such a spectacular view. And to have it be on top of his motorbike too…
The things you do to him… the things he would do to you.
Suppressing another groan, Sirius hurries to free his kickstand and lean his bike over before you realise what’s happening. It takes a lot of strength and agility but his focus has narrowly concentrated on you and nothing was going to get in his way. He has to resist going all the way – for now – but that doesn’t mean resigning himself to zero contact at all.
“Siri–?!” you squeal in surprise when he lifts you off his bike and positions you in a way that forces your legs to wrap around his hips from fear of falling, while his arms circle your hips, “what’s this all about?” you give an adorable tilt of your head as you look down at him, perched a little higher on his torso so that your hands could place themselves on his sturdy shoulders while his arm provides a sort of seat for you underneath.
“I’ll show you what this is about,” his voice is several octaves lower, barely recognisable from where they resonate at the far back of his throat. His big hands grab the globes of your ass and lower you down from your upper perch so that he grinds your covered pussy lips against his erect cock. Even through the fabric of his joggers, the sheer size of him is obvious and it’s mortifying how wet you get. He keeps you pressed against him as he swallows your shocked gasp, prying your lips apart with his tongue so he can explore your sweet mouth.
“...you can’t be showing your perfect ass like that – so pretty on top of my bike – without facing the consequences, dollface,”
“But!” you manage to protest between his eager lips, “but you said–!”
“I know what I said,” he bites at your lower lips and grinds against you, “I guess we’re both at fault that I’m like this right now, huh, baby?” he pulls away to suck and nibble on your neck, loving the moans he draws from you, “Nothing a little loving can’t fix, right?”
He won’t go too far… just a little grinding here and there while he devours your pretty little mouth. That’s all he’s asking for. And, being the lovely, kind princess that you are, of course, you oblige him.
“A-alright…” you conceded, finally trying to match his level of eagerness when his lips connected with yours once more.
“That’s my girl~”
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The initial week everything came to a head, where all was revealed and you ended up spending the night at the boys’ flat, only for disaster to hit in the form of your period the next day was weeks behind you now. You're surprised that a week after that – when you had finally gotten off your dreaded period – Remus didn’t pounce on you. Nor did James. Or Sirius. Now an entire month has passed and still nothing. James and Sirius have been more impassioned than Remus but it appears as though they’re more united than ever on the simple fact of ‘going easy’ on you.
The tall brunette insinuated such provocative things that night. Thinking back to that moment makes butterflies explode in your stomach, all while a ravenous heat spreads chaotically throughout your body. That same heat then stubbornly settles between your legs and in your lower belly. You’re ashamed to admit that you were really looking forward to what Remus planned on doing to you…
But now he’s being the perfect gentleman again and you don’t know what to do!
You love how gentlemanly he is, kissing you sweetly on the cheek, whispering loving, poetic words only for you to hear, listening to anything and everything you wanted to say with the utmost attention and interest, pulling doors open for you, doing little favours that made your days go by smoother and so much more. It felt incredibly unreasonable to complain when there was nothing to complain about! Though… were you really complaining? If you think about it, all you would be doing is expressing your opinion and providing some constructive criticism for what you want out of the relationship – there’s nothing wrong with that, is there?
When you officially became theirs and them, yours, it was established and emphasised heavily by Remus, himself, that communication was key to having a successful and loving relationship. If something was wrong, you could go to them without any hesitation; they promised to never disregard your worries or dismiss them apathetically. And you made the same promise to them, in return. If they were ever feeling insecure about something in the relationship then they could communicate any concerns they have to you without feeling an ounce of fear. By verbalising your, somewhat, embarrassing internal torment, you’d be keeping your promise and prioritising communication — just like you all promised each other!
So you have nothing to worry about…
It’s just a little hard to verbalise that’s all…
…maybe you should wait until after dinner tonight? Remus looks a little busy right now…
“Don’t look at me with those eyes, pretty girl,” Remus’ low, bordering seductive, voice tenses your nerves, pulling a lazy chuckle from the back of his throat at the adorable sight of your surprise, “you’re distracting me,” he emphasises his statement with the tap of his pen onto the papers laid out before him. Despite his comment, however, he doesn’t sound angry and he’s not frowning either. Instead, Remus has his chin in the palm of his hand and tilts his head at you, smiling fondly at your visage.
“You look like you don’t mind it,” you shot back, voice shy but quippy, parallel to the defiant folding of your arms.
Remus throws his head back with a laugh before shaking his head at you. His smile widens and he bites his lower lip to force it down just a little bit. As you put on a playful pout, your earlier thoughts slipping from your mind, the tattooed body piercer rolls over to you on his wheeled office chair.
Reaching you in a few long strides, knee to knee, he disregards your sassy comment and simply asks, “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
A heat crawls up your neck and settles on the apples of your cheeks as your earlier contemplations return. It’s a little hard to muster up your courage to speak right now. And, conveniently, the carpeted floors look very interesting all of a sudden.
“I-It was nothing,” you unfold your arms and fidget with the hem of your pleated skirt; your gaze still fixed onto the office’s dark grey carpet.
He quirks a brow but doesn’t say anything despite the question evident in his chocolate-brown eyes. His gaze holds onto your own, the small smile on his lips calming your earlier taut nerves. In your peripheral, Remus slides his fingertips over the skin of your thighs, his movement careful and feathery until he hears you suck in a sharp breath. As soon as your eyes widen, shocked by his unexpected touch and you release a sharp gasp, Remus throws all care out the window. He proceeds to slide his grip under your thighs and, hoists you up and over to sit on his lap. Thankfully his office chair doesn’t have any armrests so he’s able to comfortably seat you there, pretty as can be.
“You’re sure you can’t tell me?” he asks in a murmur, muffled by the skin of your temple as he presses a soft kiss there.
“It’s really nothing!” you squeak, avoiding his eyes and missing his fond smile as he watches you fumbling with your hands. He keeps you perfectly seated on his lap from where he firmly grips your outer thighs. Your skin is so soft and smooth with the perfect amount of fluff, to fill it in – he loves all of you but if he had to choose, he’d say your thighs were his favourite feature.
“You can be honest with me,” you don’t answer, tucking your flustered face into the crook of his neck instead. Fondly, he begins to caress the back of your head with one hand, the other still on your thigh. He lowers his voice into a quiet murmur so only you can hear, “Why don’t you whisper it to me instead?”
Funnily enough, his suggestion, no matter how simple, was convincing. It was meant for his ears only and you didn’t want to risk anyone else hearing your inner thoughts out loud. Also, the idea of whispering your carnal contemplations felt… safer somehow. Intimate too but you ran with it, your thoughts begging to be released.
Leaning up, you place one hand on his broad chest, the other on his shoulder so as to position your lips beside his ear with enough stability, “I was just thinking about…umm,”
“Hmm?...” you feel his thumbs caressing the skin of your thighs — a comforting gesture that you feel embarrassed for being unsuited to your pending admission.
“About you…”
Something flashes in his eyes, “...What about me, my love?” he hopes to god he hasn’t upset you.
You pause to muster up enough courage, “...about what you said you would do to me that night…” Hopefully, he knows what you’re referring to because you don’t think you’ll be able to articulate his exact words or the entire situation properly. You’re already far too sheepish.
Holding your breath, you wait for some sort of reaction, maybe a spoken word? Something… But Remus’ lips are sealed shut and there’s only silence. Your heart hammers in your ears as you slowly pull away from the safety of your lover’s neck and peek up to gauge his reaction, only to find that his face shows no emotion at all. You’re tempted to whisper his name, a soft prompt and an indirect request for some sort of answer when he’s suddenly pulling you into a deep kiss. One hand cups your jaw as the other explores your curves. His movement and the feeling he imbues in the kiss – all of it points to an impatience and a vicious need, the need to have you in every way possible.
Remus explores the lines of your shape but makes a small sound of displeasure when his hands are unable to sneak up the AC/DC graphic shirt you stole from Sirius as it’s tucked into your pleated skirt. Quickly, he moves his large hands back to your exposed thighs. You hold your breath as you feel his warm touch move up your warm skin, far enough to sneak past the hem of your pleated skirt.
“Please…” Remus relishes in the moan that parts your delicious, bruised lips, “I can take it! Please please please,” you gasp and pant, your shaking voice emphasising your desperation for more. You’ve waited so long, you’ve been so patient, you’re ready for this! The feel of his lips against your skin is addictive but your addiction is insatiable from that alone and you beg for more.
“Are you sure about that?” Remus’ lips make it to the shell of your ear, where his husky voice whispers as he grabs at your ass. With his hands full of you, he pulls you in to grind his bulging hardness against your puffy, lower lips and dampening panties. He relishes in the moans that you can’t contain behind trembling, kiss-bitten lips and smirks when he hears the click of the office door opening.
“She’s ready for us then?” James asks, the smirk on his lips obvious through the smug tone of his voice.
“It’s about damn time,”
Remus smiles as you tuck your flustered face into the crook of his neck and gives your ass a reassuring squeeze beneath your skirt, “Tonight, sweetheart,”
You pout at his remark and pull away with a huff, “No!” you protest defiantly, “Now!” You’re tired of waiting! And what’s the use of their upstairs, private office space if you can’t do private things in it?
“Don’t be a brat, dove,” Remus warns, the usual warmth leaving his eyes as Sirius and James step into the room and close the door behind them but don’t step an inch closer.
“But I’ve waited so long, please Rem, I promise I can take it—” you squeal loudly when a harsh slap hits your ass. So caught up in your needs, you completely missed how Remus used one hand to lift your skirt while his other prepared to deliver penance.
“Rem–!” ignoring your whining, he sits down to bend you over his lap and continues beating your ass despite your shrieks of pain. It wasn’t until you were a whimpering tearful mess that Remus finally relented, his big hand returning to their gentle touches as he comfortingly palms your sore ass. He’s sorry. But you were being a brat.
“Brats don’t deserve to get what they want, even if they say please, do I make myself clear?”
Unable to vocalise properly through your tears and pitiful whimpers, you simply nod your head but squealed when Remus cupped your tender asscheek and gave it a firm squeeze of displeasure, “Y-yes sir,”
“Good girl,” Remus hums softly,
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NAVI. | SERIES M.LIST | NEXT : 09 | THE NIGHT... →
A/N : next chapter will be where everything goes down my loves! i hope you're prepared and i'm sorry for making you all wait this long; what can i say? i love a good slow burn smut hehe~
again, i'd like to remind everyone that i have discontinued all my taglists but made a side account for you to follow so you can be notified whenever i post something new, just turn on notifications @thekqipond
please like, comment and reblog to show your support, i'd really appreciate it! property of kquil ; all written content is mine and no one else's unless stated otherwise ; do not steal, plagiarise, modify or translate to other sites
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screamlet · 4 days ago
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i wish you would write an outtake from what are your intentions where tommy tries to explain that he was sooooo confused by eddie and buck and eddieandbuck at first and it made him feel insane
(for the "i wish you would write" game)
i miss these boys! but here's something that could have happened in what are your intentions? this would probably be set after chapter 8. you don't have to have read the story for it to make sense.
notes: established relationship bucktommy; tommy pov complete; 1.4k; rated cute for cute
---
It happens once in a while, that their days off are on an actual weekend, and those feel weirdly special to Tommy. He's participating in something… normal: it's 9 AM and he's lying in bed with his boyfriend, their limbs tangled into some mess that's not spooning as much as thrown in the cutlery drawer. Evan's legs are so long and they like to wind around Tommy's like a pair of vines; every shift that tightens makes him laugh. Their hands are linked on top of the covers and they've got nowhere to be. This is as close to perfect as life can get. 
So of course, his brain thinks of Eddie. 
It seems wild now, about six months into their relationship, that Tommy ever thought Eddie and Evan had something going on, because they're just… Eddie-and-Evan. Once Evan kissed him that first time, it felt like that question was answered and that door was shut. But that kiss was so… 
"Can I ask you something weird?"
"You promise?" Evan asks.
"Promise what?"
"That it'll be weird."
Tommy bites his shoulder. "Now your expectations are too high, so kick them back down a little, huh?" Evan shrugs and pushes back against Tommy's chest. "That time with the basketball game, when you messed up Eddie's ankle, and I came to talk to you after—"
"You mean our first kiss," Evan croons, dripping with sap and affection. 
"Yeah, yeah, I guess." Tommy kisses his shoulder like he's making a point. "Actually, even before that, when I was hanging out with Eddie but not you, I kept thinking: did you guys ever…"
"Ever…"
Tommy takes their joined hands and pats Evan's dick through the covers. Evan bursts out laughing.
"What? That's how you ask?"
"I'm trying to deflect from the fact that it's a dumb question!"
Evan glances over his shoulder. "You think it's dumb?"
Tommy makes a face and makes sure he can see it. "Yeah, now I do, but when I first met Eddie and I didn't know you, I wondered if the two of you…"
Evan shakes his head. "No. It's Eddie."
"He's a good-looking guy and you really were a dense-as-hell bisexual if it never occurred to you. Seriously? No guy crush or drunken—"
"It's Eddie."
"Yeah, exactly! You guys are joined at the hip and when it was just me and him—"
"Joined at the hip, not joined at the dick. It's Eddie." Evan's quiet for a second, like he's thinking. "I think Chim or Hen made fun of me when he first joined because I was really jealous of him and how cool he was, and he'd been in the army. Then on one of our first shifts, we extracted a live grenade that a dude had in his thigh? And—"
"You what."
"Okay, maybe now it sounds like how I acted when I first met you, less jealousy and more acting like an idiot, but—"
"No, the live grenade. It was where?"
Evan turns around. "It was in a dude's thigh. It was a collectible, but then it turned out it was a live round inside."
"And you survived?"
"We did! Eddie was so cool. He extracted it, right, and put it in one of those black boxes. The guy had a ton of blood loss so we got him out, got out of the ambulance, and then when the bomb squad sent in their robot, the whole ambulance blew up. And then that was it. Jealousy over, we were friends." Evan turns his head again. "Did you think we were together or something?"
"Hold on, I'm processing the live grenade thing. It blew up an ambulance. What the hell is your life?"
"Not the weirdest thing that ever happened to me."
"I'm so, so aware of that."
Evan nudges his elbow into Tommy's stomach. "What'd you think of me and Eddie?"
"So… you've gotta remember, okay? I walk around the world with a pair of big gay goggles that are invisibly welded to my head and they never come off, so… I was hanging out with Eddie and he was always talking about you! Always saying how much he loved you, you were his best friend, Christopher loved you, telling me you were so lovable, you were just the best guy in the world, and then Chris couldn't stop talking about you and he loved you so, you know."
"Huh."
Tommy unwraps himself from Evan's legs and sits up on his heels. "But that's the thing, he was so straight about it and—I can't explain it! All these gay things were coming out of his mouth, but all the vibes were like, even when I'm peeing I actively try not to think about my dick too much. I didn't get it. I still don't! And then Lucy compared you guys to the raptors in Jurassic Park, and how he was the bait but you were the clever girl about to jump me."
Evan laughs and tilts his head on the pillow, looking coy. "Really? I don't even know what that means."
"It made sense when I was insane, and I was completely insane. I wasn't even jealous, just confused!" Tommy huffs. "Confused and seriously horny when I got to your place to talk, but I didn't know!"
"Did you have to know?" Evan asks.
It rushes out of Tommy before he has time to think about it: "I mean, yeah. You two are pretty big guys, like, you could still punch me in the face if I read you wrong and hit on you. Not that you would, either of you, but." Evan reaches for his hand and Tommy half-smiles. "The gay goggles, right? They do more than set off awooga sirens when a hot guy walks by. You've gotta be sure about that stuff."
"Is that why you didn't call me?" Evan asks. "About getting a beer after we met up at Harbor and you abandoned me for Eddie?"
"Well. Yeah, kinda. I figured if this straight guy wants to hang out again, we'll hang out again. But if I ask you out—"
"You could have asked, though. Hanging out, just friends?"
Tommy takes a deep breath. "Even then, I think I knew I couldn't ask you out like that. Platonically. So I wanted to be sure. And you kept looking at me like you didn't want to be "just" friends, so—" Tommy groans and shifts around again so he's sitting cross legged on the bed. "Do you see what I mean? You drive me insane."
Evan reaches out and touches his chin, thumb in his cleft. "I love you. You're really sweet and completely insane."
"Obviously I'm fine now. Don't give me that look." 
Evan drags him back down to the bed. He tangles his legs with Tommy's again. This time they're facing each other, the better for Evan to wrap his arms around Tommy's back and kiss him, ensnare him forever. "Was that weird enough for you?" Tommy asks between kisses. 
"Getting there, but I've got a high tolerance," Evan says with a grin. "It's funny, though, you say those things—lots of people have said that about me and Eddie—but, I don't know. Literally never a thought in my head. Even when I used to go out with him and Chris and people would act like I'm also Chris's dad, I'd feel like: hey, they think I'm a dad, that's so cool. Not the Eddie part."
"So that's no to Eddie, yes to baby, got it." 
They freeze, suddenly, because that's—not a thing they've talked about—and it's way too early to talk about—
"Can I ask you something really scary?" Evan asks quietly. "Can we put that question in a black box for a little bit and check it out later?"
"Leave it for when we've got our tactical gear and a bomb robot? Yeah, absolutely. I haven't even had coffee."
"We haven't even had coffee," Evan whines. "Let's go have coffee."
"Hey." Tommy holds him closer and kisses him. "I'll wait, okay? No rush."
Evan stares at him and nods slowly. "Yeah." When he kisses Tommy again, it's sure, not scared or worried. Confident, again. "We're not going anywhere." Tommy agrees, kisses him again, and stays. He loves him and he stays. 
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yelenasdiary · 7 months ago
Note
I have request for A widow's sunshine
Could you write a reader that is like fifteen or sixteen and she found out recently she's like lesbian and she comes out to her parents and also tells them she has been dating someone for awhile
Hope this made sense, English is not first language lol
Coming Out
Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader, Natasha Romanoff x Daughter! Reader, Kate Bishop x Reader
Summary: You come out to your parents for the first time
Angst, Comfort
Warnings: Mentions of Homophobia?, Mentions of fears of being disowned, if I missed any, please let me know | 0.9K
AC: Thank you for sending this! I am also open to an alternatives to this! If you want Reader to come out as anything, I would be happy to write it! 
A Widow’s Sunshine Masterlist
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For months now, you couldn’t come to terms with the feelings you were having. You knew deep down that your mothers wouldn’t judge you or disown you but still, the thought of coming out to your parents brought its worries. You’ve known since you started high school that you were a lesbian, you’ve never looked at a boy and thought about how they looked or ever having a little crush on any. But you found yourself crushing hard on a girl in your history class. 
Kate Bishop. What could you say about the girl with blue eyes and long dark hair without falling harder for her? She was funny, carefree and extremely skilled at archery. You ended up helping her with some history homework which is how the two of you formed a friendship, a friendship which soon led to a relationship. Being a sixteen-year-old and having a girl in your room wasn’t something that your parents worried about, in fact, they never had a reason to worry. You’d never been open about your sexuality with them, but you also almost never showed them any interest in a romantic life for them to have questions about. 
Well, Wanda did. Sometimes you’d come home from Kate’s house with a flustered look and your lips as red as strawberries. She didn’t want to scare you or make you think you were in trouble for anything, but it was something Wanda noticed and did bring up to Nat who was now her wife of 8 years. 
You wanted to tell them; you really did. You wanted them to meet Kate and for Kate to meet them but any time you thought to bring it up, your stomach turned and suddenly you were telling Kate that you couldn’t do it. But something changed in you tonight. It was time and you promised yourself you wouldn’t let the feeling in your stomach change your mind. 
Wanda and Nat were washing up the dishes from dinner, Wanda handing the wet plates to Nat to dry and put away when you had interrupted them. “Is everything okay love?” Wanda asked, drying her hands on the clean hand towel. You nodded, “I just need to talk to you both about something, its important” you replied. 
“Okay, how about we sit in the dining room” Your mother, Nat, suggested in a soft tone. You smiled softly in reply before wandering into the dining room and taking a seat, waiting for your mothers to take theirs. They sat together across from you, looking at them as they waited for you to speak only made your stomach turn more than before. You swallowed the lump in your throat, your eyes dropped to your hands that were in your lap as you picked at your nails. 
“I….I don’t know how to say it” you said almost too quietly. 
“Whatever it is honey, we are here to listen” Nat replied, “did something happen?” She asked. You shook your head, “N-no, thing has happened, but something might?” You looked up slowly. Your reply only worried your mothers more. 
“What do you mean sweetheart?” Wanda asked. You could tell by your mom’s tone that your comment added more to their worries. 
“I mean-“ you sighed, trying to rack your brain for the right words to form but all you could think of was how nervous you were feeling and how you were starting to think this was a bad idea. “Y/n, it’s okay, just say whatever comes to mind” Nat said softly. You looked to her and nodded, taking a moment to gather yourself. 
“Well, I guess I know you both won’t judge or disown me, but I guess I am just worried about others” you started, “Mom, Ma, I like girls and I have a girlfriend” the words flew from your lips. Both of your mothers smiled at you, “oh honey, how long have you had that built up?” Wanda asked. 
“I guess I’ve known I’m a lesbian for a year but Kate and I, we started dating two months ago” you replied with honesty. 
“Kate as in your friend Kate? The one you have study dates with?” Nat asked, just wanting to know more about the young teen who has stolen your heart. You nodded, “I really want you guys to meet her, like properly. Not just in passing when you pick me up from school”
“We would love to meet her” Nat replied with another soft smile, “but you are studying at those study dates, right?” She added slightly rising her brow. Your eyes widened at her suggestion, and you were quick to close those thoughts down. “Yes, I promise!” You replied. 
“Sweetheart, what did you mean that you’re worried about what others might think? has somebody said something?” Wanda asked, bring the topic back to your comment that she couldn’t forget. 
“Oh, I guess I was just overthinking things” you said. Your mind now reminding you that all the people who love you would never judge you for this, if they were to do so, they would be judging your parents as well and you knew that would never go down well. 
“How do you feel about Kate coming over for dinner tomorrow night? I’ll cook” Wanda smiled. 
“I’d really like that” you replied, trying to hide the giddy smile that tugged at your lips, “so would Kate” you added.
Natasha stood up and walked over to you, wrapping her arms around you and placing a kiss on the top of your head, “we love you so much” she whispered, “and I’m really happy for you detka” she added. Her loving support really helped push any other negative thoughts you were having away. You knew you could never doubt the love and support from your parents and you were glad you were finally confident enough to open up to them.
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Taglist: @koinsss | @liloandstitchstan | @marcia-maximoff | @skittlebum | @katethewritersblog | @taliiiaasteria | @nova-kyle | @daddipantherr | @riyaexee | @sgm616 | @elle161989 | @alphalesbianwolffoxdragontribrid | @mathxa | @sxlfishbrokenheart | 
If you want to be on the taglist for this series, please see the masterlist. It's linked at the top of this post.
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royalarchivist · 9 months ago
Text
Phil briefly talks about QSMP, the admin situation, Quackity, the new team, and the harassment both Quackity and the admins have been receiving.
Please listen to the clip and read the transcript in its entirety. Keep in mind that things can easily be taken out of context (even this clip, though I did try to include everything he said).
If you'd like to see the full unedited conversation, Phil started talking about last week's interactions with YD and Bad ~1h 57m into today's VOD, which led into this conversation about QSMP.
[ Complete Transcript ↓ ]
Phil: Yeah, she's great. Another- another reason why QSMP is just like... fuckin' incredible. That was like, not even ever going to happen without QSMP. Like, obviously it's had its problems, it's go– it's had its problems. Those problems are being rectified. All the people that were wrong'uns have been fired [Laughs] And Quackity's put a new team together. So like, I'm so happy that I'm like– that Q is doing everything he can right now to make it like, right.
But I am still just sad that Chayanne and Tallulah are just asleep, that is just making me real sad. So I've been like, logging on whenever I can to just like, hang out and stuff and just, you know, be around. But I am- I am just sad boy now. [Laughs] I've like– throwing all those penguins into the- the Spawn area was like, my limit. And the like, laughing with YD and Bad kind of cheered me up a bit.
But yeah, I'm sure most of you can agree. It's like, once- once you've been making content on a server a certain way, it's- it's been like, 6 - 8 months of like, the same like type of content I've been making on that server. It's been very lore-heavy, it's been very Egg hanging out with the Eggs and just chilling. Like, not even like doing anything crazy. We would just hang out. But yeah, I'm sure everyone's in the same boat. Like, we all just like, miss that, you know?
So... just gotta wait around. Just gotta wait. Wait for things to get better. Trust in Big Q.
But yeah, moments- moments like the other day, Chat, where me, Bad, and YD were just hanging out just like kind of... you know, it just kind of like... What's the word I'm looking for? Like, drills home how important the QSMP is and can be for connecting people. Not just now, but in the future. And like, that- I feel like that is something that's definitely worth protecting, or something that's worth like, seeing happen in the future with other people. Not even thinking about like, if I'm gonna be interacting with anyone like, thinking about like other people interacting with other people in the future. It's fucking- It's so cool.
Like, imagine seeing like, brand new streamers that you might've not have heard of interacting with people that you know right now. Not necessarily me or people that I know, but like– like, the connections that we've all made.
Dude, Me and Kristin went to fuckin' Switzer-France to hang out with these people! [Laughs] Cellbit and Lore traveled from fucking Brazil to Switzer-France to hang out! The- these connections are like, mental. Just never would have happened without the server, and that's definitely something worth protecting. And like, ensuring it is done the correct way in the future.
That means a lot to us Chat, it does– [Briefly responds to Chat] It means a lot to us and like, obviously the admins being well-taken care of is like, at the fore-front.
And Quackity speaks very highly of this new team. He's like- he's chatted to us like, in calls and stuff. He's been keeping us up to date on everything that's been going on behind the scenes, everything that he can tell us anyways. And like, he is very happy with this new team. He pretty much said that they are like, very passionate about the project, and we can like, trust that he trusts them to do a very good job. So...
Yeah, I'm excited but like, we just have to kind of like, wait. Like, there's a lot being changed around, there's a lot of plans. But the good thing to know is that the people that caused harm have been removed. And now the people that are like, in charge are like, very passionate about the project and just want to see everyone happy and succeed and be taken care of. But these things take time. So we just have to hang about, we have to wait.
[Responding to someone asking about what happened with QSMP and the Admin situation] I'm not going to go into too much detail, you can find out exactly what has gone on, and it's not as simple as black and white. It's- there's a lot of gray areas in there, and it's like very complicated, so you can go look it up yourself, but ultimately, all you need to know is that the initial admin team, the like, head people at the top that Quackity put in charge like ages ago when the server first started were making decisions that were like, not good for the health and also the well-being of the actors, and like, admins and like, the staff. So like, some staff were fine, other staff had a shit fucking time, and it was unfair and terrible and went unnoticed for a while, and then it all came out and Quackity's been like, fixing it since.
Most recently, he stepped down from the team because of like, how serious shit was getting. Like, people online have been fucking awful. And it's very dangerous at the minute for like the ex- like, members of the team, and also him. It's like- it's terrible.
So it's very heated, very– it's– again— and it's not as simple as just like "This- this is– this is right, this is wrong." It's like- it's very- there's a lot of muddled areas, and it's not as easy as just saying "This is exactly what happened." I'm summarizing. I'm literally just summarizing. But all you need to know right now, the latest update is that the team that are in charge are very passionate about the projects and are like, much, much better and will take care of the new people and the admins and all the actors and stuff a lot better than the last fucking team because the initial problem was that Quackity kind of like, took a bit more of a step back and he wasn't like, overseeing every single thing that was going on behind the scenes, but now he's had to- he's had to take a step back, he's been forced to take a step back, but he's left it in the hands of a team that he truly trusts this time. Like, he's actually fully-vetted.
So HOPEFULLY– again: there's more things that need to be done behind the scenes, and I'm not an official spokesperson, I'm just a person playing on the fucking server that my friend has made, and I'm very happy to support him, and I trust that he will do and continue to do the right thing.
But yeah. Not as simple as just [Snaps fingers] "This is this." It's like– there's so much fucking like, middle ground and shit that's gone on. And that's all I'm gonna say on it! 'Cuz otherwise it's just gonna go on and on and on, and people are gonna be like, "What do you know?" and be like "I don't know shit!" And the stuff that I do know, I probably can't talk about right now. There's like, certain things that like, can't be said, for legal reasons and stuff.
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bruciemilf · 23 days ago
Text
Bruce’s first love punches him in the face when he’s 6 years old.
Silver St Cloud is power on two feet and her hair glows like sunshine lemonade. Her silk white shirt clashes with Gotham’s darks, greys, and blues.
“Why did you push him?!” She picks up the small boy Bruce shoved out of the swingset. He feels bad. It wasn’t meant to hurt that badly. “Just cause you’re a Wayne doesn’t mean you can do what you want!”
“…Because you wanted a turn.”
She looks beautiful, full of fury, but she’s divine when she blushes.
He buys the boy ice cream with his allowance money, and Thomas doesn’t give him anymore for the next 4 months, but there’s still pride in him.
Their friendship lasts until he’s 8. After that, he’s not friends with anybody.
Bruce is 18, and for Gotham Academy. That means something.
They all graduate when they’re 15, max. Silver stays behind a few years. Her family undoubtedly know it’s on purpose, but they don’t care enough to mention it.
She doesn’t know why he has so many bruises. But, she’ll find out. Hot hell or tall water.
“Sunshine?”
She’s been crying in the girl’s bathroom for an hour. Her white lamb wool stockings are ripped at the knees, her blood is still drying the floor, and her mouth hurts.
There’s a deep groan on the other side, pained like a dying dog. When she comes out, finally, their math teacher lays butchered on the bathroom floor. Not dead, but probably wishes he’d be.
Silver stomps on his face until her mouth stops hurting.
And the, when their 20s blossom, Bruce vanishes. No shadow, no traces, no goodbye.
She’s still there. When he comes back, she’s still there. “Are you gonna give me a Best Secretary Award, Mr. Wayne?”
He doesn’t smile, not really. But there’s always a faint grin there, when they talk, little and sweet and Silver will never regret him.
She doesn’t like the Bat.
He’s big and scary and his hands are cold and he’s too much Gotham and too little Bruce. But then again, she never liked anyone BESIDES Bruce.
His little birdie IS cute, thought, when he beams up at her, “Hi, Miss Sunshine!”
Silver looks at the Bat, and he looks back at her, and Silver’s mouth presses in a thin line.
“…You gonna take Jason and I out to dinner and explain this?”
“…Yes ma’am. “
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wheredidhiseyebrowsgo · 3 months ago
Note
Hiya! Do you know any Sterek fics where Derek rejects the mate bond with Stiles and just ignores it all, leading to Stiles feeling the strain or pain of an ignored/incomplete bond? I've read one before where Derek just moved away cuz he didn't think it was a big deal and Stiles really took the brunt of it. But any fics that are similar would be perfect. P.S. Thank you for everything that you do and I hope that you're having a great day!
Oh yes. I love this kind of angst.
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soulmates tbh by bleep0bleep
(1/1 I 1,423 I Teen)
"It’s been five months," Derek says darkly. "Why am I still getting these proposals? You know these are probably all fake marks."
Five months since the paparazzi had snapped that photo of him with the overzealous fan tugging at his shirt, five months since millions of people on the Internet realized that the birthmark revealed was in fact, the mark, five months Derek was inundated by claims from people who desperately wanted him to believe that they were his soul-mate.
Second Chances by rootbeer
(1/1 I 2,624 I General)
"A lot of times the ‘markings’ were common, simple things you said to strangers all the time. 'Excuse me'; 'thank you'; 'hello'. Some got extremely romantic things like 'it’s you isn’t it? I’ve been waiting for you' or 'Wow you’re really pretty'. And they were always the first words their soulmate would ever say to them.
Of course, having 'You are the fucking worst kind of person in the world' tattooed down your side, didn’t bode well. How fucked up was Stiles Stilinski that even his fucking Soulmate hated him? High School had been a special kind of hell when all the kids learned what his tattoo said—despite his best efforts to keep it a secret."
Three Marks by sanam
(8/8 I 113,736 I Mature)
"And then there was pain again, but this time it was in only three places—his arm, below his clavicle, and next to his heart, all on the left side. It felt like the skin was being sliced apart, ripped open, flayed off— And suddenly it was done. Derek looked across the room and saw the boy on the floor, looking about as bad as Derek felt."
Derek and Stiles learn that bonding is probably best done with ridiculous amounts of video games and maybe a little bit of time.
I Hunt For You With Bloody Feet by CharWright5
(26/26 I 200,462 I Explicit)
“Mates don't always mean happy ever after.”
When twenty-year-old born omega werewolf Stiles Stilinski received that cryptic email from his twin brother—who'd been missing for two years exactly—in a language the two of them had made up, his drive to find Stuart is doubled. The search leads him to Oak Creek, the most secured and heavily fortified city in all of California, where he finds that not only is his brother dead, but also the literal alpha of his Dreams in Derek Hale—who just happens to be his twin's Mate and the main suspect in Stiles' eyes. Despite an agreement to fight mutual feelings, the two are still drawn to each other as they try to solve the case themselves, uncovering a plot that goes deeper than the murder of just one wolf.
Blue Monday by ExpectNothingGainEverything
(19/? I 535,709 I Explicit)
Stiles would have never guessed that the star player of the lacrosse team and presumably the hottest guy in school who everyone wanted a piece of and one of his most hated bullies would turn out to be his soulmate.
Derek would never have dreamed that fate would be so cruel to pair him up with a freak like Stilinski.
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anonymityisfunwriter · 10 months ago
Text
To Know Him Is To Love Him
summary: to know steve rogers is to love him. to know him is to keep handing over your heart over and over again. to know him is to be broken by him.
pairing: steve rogers x reader
an: quick someone give this to a boy to read and ask him what steve did wrong. it's for science.
Anon's 1K Celebration
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to know him is to love him.
to know him is to stand by him.
to know him is to allow him to break your heart over and over again.
to know him is to hope that one day he'll finally see.
to know him is to be broken by him.
you can't count how many times he put you here, put in this situation. and worse, you can't count how many times you've let him put you in this situation.
three months ago...
you fix steve's tie, patting his shoulder to send him off on yet another date - after he invited himself into your apartment to get him ready for his date. you hated this feeling, the feeling of unrequited love.
you can't blame him, he doesn't know. at least, you think he doesn't know. in fact, you're sure he doesn't, he would never hurt you like that.
"i swear if this date doesn't go well, i'm swearing off women for good."
"does that mean i'm out a friend?" you tease.
"no, of course not," steve laughs. "you're my best friend. you don't count."
your smile falls at the words fall out of his mouth with ease. you don't count. you're not even a consideration. "i don't count as a woman?"
"you know what i meant. you're my friend."
you don't know what he meant. not in the slightest.
"right," you clear your throat, shaking your head with furrowed brows. "good luck on your date."
two months ago...
"i would tell him, but he's just - he's confusing," you admit. "i get a lot of mixed signals."
"men are just idiots," nat offers in consolation. "someday, he'll see. you're perfect for each other."
"thanks." you smile, walking back to your table with a fresh round of drinks. "what are you guys talking about?"
"about steve's terrible dating record," sam jokes.
"ah," you hum, you settle in the booth beside him, leaving plenty of room between the two of you.
steve frowns at you, reaching behind you and gripping your waist. without a word, he slides you until you're pressed against his thigh.
sam humorously snorts, "i don't get you two. you're attached at the hip. you're both attractive singles. make it official already."
you look to steve's reaction for any indication of what he's feeling. steve leans over, kissing your temple, "she knows she's my other half, my soulmate. we don't need labels."
"soulmate?" sam teases.
you shift uncomfortably. he never asked you that, never asked you if you wanted a label. he's never even asked you on a real date, but now he's declaring that he's your soulmate.
how blind can he be?
one month ago...
"please, i miss you, sweetheart." you squeeze your eyes shut. the term of endearment rolls so easily off his tongue. "i feel like i haven't seen you in forever."
it's intentional. you're trying to get over him. to move past these feelings. he doesn't make it easy. "i know, i've just been busy."
"how about dinner tonight? my place at 8?"
you chew on the inside of your cheek, hesitant to accept his dinner invite, "i don't know, steve."
"please, i need you."
putting distance between you and steve rogers didn't work. not when he so dutifully sought you out. not when he told you over and over again that he missed you. that he didn't know how to be without you.
his words toy with your head just enough to convince that it's a good idea to enter his gravitational orbit again.
you're not strong enough to resist the pull. you're not strong enough to to say no. you never have been.
you decide that you can't do this. you're going to tell him. you'll tell him. you'll tell him that you want to count. you'll tell him that you want him to see you.
to know him is to love him, you remember. the moment you see him, you crumble. that smile that makes it feel like your life is worthwhile. the eyes that send your rational mind into a haze. to know him is to love him.
he doesn't make it easy for you or your heart. he greets you at the door with a beaming grin, his eyes lighting up. it makes you feel like this is more than just a dinner. it feels like you're finally coming home to him.
you falter as his fingers graze your skin to take off your jacket. the apartment isn't his usual scene either. it feels like so much more than just a normal hangout. it feels... romantic. music spinning on his record player, marvin gaye, you recognize. candles lit in the center of the table. the smell of a home cooked meal simmering over the stove.
you turn to him with a nervous smile, "i thought you we were ordering pizza or something."
"i wanted to do something nice for my best girl."
his best girl.
he spends the whole dinner fawning over you. his hand rests on your leg. the other occasionally grazing the back of your hand. he asks you all about your work, about your love life.
"i missed you so much."
you're so entranced by him that your carefully thought out speech is gone, replaced by a soft whisper, "i love you."
"i love you, too." he smiles down at him. his eyes shining bright and blue. it doesn't even occur to him that you're professing your love for him. "i can't imagine my life without you."
you shake your head, reminding yourself that you had to tell him. you needed to move forward, one way or another. "no, steve, i - i'm in love with you."
an anxious chuckle leaves his mouth. his hand drops from your thigh, leaving you feeling cold, hollow, and abandoned. "what?"
you know a rejection when you see one. at least you can move on now. your heart can begin to heal. maybe in time, you could be friends again. "i just had to tell you. just once."
"i don't -" he licks his lips. "i'm sorry, i don't feel the same."
"i understand."
2 weeks ago...
you sigh at yourself, hearing the familiar ding of another voicemail on your phone.
each one chips away at your resolve, each one shatters your broken heart even more.
you told him you understood. you told him that it was okay. you spent the night consoling him. you soothed his fears that he would lose you.
in return, he made you promise to always be in his life. with a broken heart and wounded pride, you weren't strong enough to say no. you simply asked for time and a little space.
time and space that steve had no interest in giving you.
you made it easy for him. you retreated from mutual friends. from social spaces you occupied. you no longer texted or called first. you just needed time.
still, he sought you out.
you've gained enough strength to stop answering his every call and text. you've stuck to your boundaries, at least, the ones steve doesn't seem intent on steamrolling past.
you clutch your kitchen counter with your head hung low. with a couple deep breaths and reminders that he doesn't feel the same for you, you're slowly glad you didn't answer. you're proud of yourself for being strong and doing what's best for you.
at least, you're glad until there's a banging at your door.
your mending heart regrets the moment you answer.
"steve?"
"you weren't answering," he pants, clutching the frame of your doorway, "i wanted to hear your voice."
"steve..." you sputter. "this isn't - it's-"
"i just miss you," he cuts you off. he looks so heartbroken, so sincere. he misses you. you try to not make anything more of it, but then he says it again, "i miss you so much."
you stand to the side, allowing him to pass, "come in."
"thank you," he sighs in relief.
"what happened?"
"the worst date of my life."
you swear you can feel your heart fracturing. the air feels like its being squeezed out of your lungs.
and still, you stand before him trying to look as unaffected as possible. you don't know how effective it is. you don't think he sees you enough to notice either way. "you were on a date?"
"it was awful. she was vapid and boring and - and pretentious - and - and she wasn't you."
you suck in a breath, "steve..."
these were words from a man who did not love you, from a man that did not count you. they sounded an awful lot like the love he claimed he didn't feel.
suddenly, he cups your face, standing too close to you. this wasn't what friends did. this isn't how friends treated each other. you know that.
and then he kisses you. soft and tenderly. his lips mold against yours perfectly. you swear it's a sigh of relief that leaves his mouth when you don't pull away.
you smile against his lips. a sense of rightness overtakes you. he overwhelms you. he consumes you. he grips your waist tightly. the other hand caressing your cheek.
"steve.." you sigh against his lips.
and he freezes. his hands drop as though you burned him. his lips slightly swollen and shining from the kiss. he wipes his mouth, "i should go."
you shake your head. you don't want to believe that this is happening right now. this is steve. the person you loved with every fiber of your being. your friend. you trusted him. you believed in him. he wouldn't hurt you like that. even if he didn't love you, even as just a friend, he wouldn't take advantage of your love for him like that. "what?"
"i should go."
and he leaves without another word.
your heart isn't just broken anymore, it's crumbled into a million little pieces. you're not sure you'll ever be able to fix it.
1 week ago...
he's blown past all your defenses. he's drained every ounce of strength from you. he's taken everything except your broken heart and your love for him. that's all that's left of you.
to know him is to love him. to know him is to be broken by him.
he calls and this time, you answer. you fear him coming back to your apartment like he did before. your heart couldn't take it anymore.
"hi, steve." your voice is so gravelly and hollow, a shell of the fullness and life it used to contain.
you noticed everything about him. his likes, his dislikes. you could tell the day he was having by the way he said hi, by the sort of smile he gave you. you're not sure why you just realized that it's not reciprocated at all. he once told you he loved the sound of your voice, how could he not hear the broken tone? if he notices, which you're sure he doesn't, he doesn't ask.
you can hear the smile in his voice, "i'm so glad you answered."
you're not even sure that he realizes you've put the phone down. after all, you're just his space filler.
now...
you don't know why you're surprised he showed up at your door again. you're not surprised that you opened the door. you're not surprised that you let him back into your home. you're not even surprised that he's talking to you like everything is normal.
the only thing that takes you by surprise is your unwillingness to hear about the misadventures of his dating life.
"steve," you try to interrupt.
"and all i want -"
"steve."
"is for someone to really hear me, to see -"
"steve." you're surprised by the harshness in your own voice. his eyes flash over to you, widened slightly in shock. "you - you have to go now."
his brow furrow, he's taken aback. it occurs to you that he has no idea what he's done wrong. "why?"
"you know why," you spit at him.
"no, you said you understood. you said we could still be friends."
"friends?" you bitterly chuckle. "friends don't hurt their friends over and over again."
"i don't understand."
"that's the problem, steve. you don't get it. you don't get that i don't want to hear about the girls you date. you don't get that it hurts hearing you talk about what you're looking for in a woman. it hurts when call me at the end of the night because you want to hear my voice."
"they why do you answer the phone?"
"because i love you!" you hopelessly exclaim. "because i’ll do anything for you. i’ll do anything you say. and i think you know that."
"am i just supposed to know that you didn’t want to hear about them?"
"no girl wants that," you whisper. "no one wants to hear about everything they don’t have."
"i don't understand what's happening here. you promised me that you would always be in my life!" his accusing tone offends you far more than it should.
a tear slips down your cheek. "that was before."
"before? before what?"
each word hurts. he really doesn't know. he doesn't think about you at all. not as a consideration. not as a woman. not even as just a friend. he doesn't see you at all. "i can do this anymore. it’s too hard. i can - i can’t keep letting you break my heart."
"i told you that i didn’t feel the same. you knew i wasn’t in a space to - to reciprocate."
"and then you kissed me!"
he stiffens at the kiss that he refused to mention. all those nights he spent on the phone with you, talking to you. it was the one thing he never spoke about. "i - i know that wasn’t right. and i’m sorry, okay? i’m sorry i did that. i was hurting."
"you were hurting?" your breaths come out in fragments, with each heave of your chest you can hear the whistle of emptiness where your heart used to reside. "you - you knew how i felt and you knew you didn’t feel the same and you kissed me anyway."
"it was a mistake. i'm sorry."
your hands ball up in frustration, tear burn at the corners of your eyes. "it’s not just about the kiss. it’s - it’s everything. it’s you. you won’t let me go. let me move on. please."
steve staggers back, "i don’t- i'm not trying to hold on to you."
"why did you call me the other night?"
"because you’re my friend. you’re the person i wanted to talk to. you understand. you always understand."
"i don’t. i don’t understand. it crushed me."
he reaches out for your hand. hurt flashes in his eyes when you snatch it out of his reach. you can't let him blind you this time. "you’re always there for me. even when no one else is, you are."
you snort, "you don’t even know what you did wrong, do you?"
"you’re my best friend. i just - i wanted you hear your voice."
"you see? you keep messing with my head. you tell me that i'm the person you want to talk to at the end of the night. you tell people that i'm your soulmate. you tell me that you don’t feel the same. i tell you i want to move on. you kiss me. then you go on a date with another girl. when it doesn’t work out, you call me. i'm done. i can’t do this anymore. loving you is breaking me far beyond repair."
"i do love you."
you fervently shake your head over and over again, "you don’t mean that."
"i love you and i know it’s not in the same way but maybe - just give me time."
"time isn’t going to fix this. you don’t love me. you love the way i make you feel. you love being loved."
he scoffs, shooting a glare at you, "that’s not fair."
"no, it’s not," you agree. "and it’s not fair that you know how i feel and yet you just keep hurting me. you do it over and over again. and i keep letting you."
steve reaches for you again, "we can fix this."
you shake him off, striding to your door, opening it for him, "you should go."
"please," steve begs.
"goodbye, steve."
you don't know how you gather the strength to close the door on the man you love more than anything, let alone the man begging to stay in your life. the door clicks shut behind him.
a choked sob escapes your mouth as tears freely fall.
to know him is to love him, and you don't want to know a thing about steve rogers anymore.
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withleeknow · 9 months ago
Text
wishful thinking. (06)
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chapter six: like lightning
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summary: the instruction was plain and simple: no strings attached. but you should’ve known from the beginning that it could never apply to you and him.
pairing: minho x f!reader rating: 18+ (minors dni) genres/warnings: friends to lovers, friends with benefits au, college au; fluff, angst, smut; mentions of sex, swearing, this chapter is also pretty mild in terms of warnings? the angst begins here tho !!! could've been more edited but yk lol word count: 4.9k
as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡
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If I never laid eyes on you Would I feel something missing? If you never laid eyes on me Would you know something’s gone?
Happy Accidents - Saint Motel
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You don't know if you've ever changed, even once, in your life.
You feel like you're still 8 years old and your best friend is the neighbors' elderly dog that they let you play with every weekend. She's a golden retriever, and she would stand taller than you if she could walk on two legs.
You're still 16 and your happiest memories are of a boy who doesn't love you back. But all of your friends say that he does, and oh, how much you want to believe that their words are true.
And at the same time, you're 22, just a few months shy of 23, sitting in front of a canvas showcasing your own bleeding heart. Your growing pains, laid out by acrylics and gentle brush strokes. You liken yourself to the figure in front of you, the one that's standing in the corner of your painting, overlooking a sea of blues and grays. There's a piece of you that's left behind in everything you create. Sometimes, you leave it there on purpose, a memorabilia for your future self to look back at fondly.
You think of everything in your life that has changed and how you're the only thing that has managed to remain the same. The dog eventually dies and the boy moves on with his life. The passage of time is relentless but you seem to be the only one who can't keep up with the tireless flow. You're always running in place, always stuck behind in the end. There's a past in which you still live, one where you don’t know if you'll ever make it out of.
You think of home and the search comes up empty, like it does every single time. Home isn't here inside of your own body, nor is it within the four walls of your childhood bedroom. You've never felt like you belong anywhere. Everything is always fluctuating, constantly and unabatingly spinning and spinning and spinning when all you're asking for is a minute to stand still and catch your breath.
Home isn't always a place, that much you know. Maybe home isn't even a thing that you build but something that you find, in a person or a touch, in a feeling or a scent. Perhaps that's the problem, isn't it? Home is something you find, and you've spent your whole life searching.
People say your early 20s are supposed to be the best years of your life but that sentiment has never resonated with you. These are the years that you spend in excruciating limbo, where you're not an adult but you're forced to be anyway. The years where loneliness is an invisible friend that shadows you day in and day out, a presence you don’t want around but can't seem to shake off, a haunting that's far too gentle to be considered such. These aren't your best years; these are your saddest years.
None of it helps build character. It just hurts.
It hurts. You accept that it hurts. You keep on living, always accompanied by the hurt. At some point, it stops bothering you as much; you've grown numb to the way it stings, but it doesn't mean that there aren't days where you're pierced with a sudden and debilitating hollowness in your chest.
Here you are, half an adult but still a child, wondering if you know anything more than you did when you were 8.
You just want to go home, but you don't know where home is.
You look at the small pool of yellow acrylic paint that's been sitting on your palette for a while now. It feels so out of place among the other insipid tones, even though that has always been your intention - a burst of life amidst a sea of blues.
You don't think about anything in particular when your fingers pick up a brush and dab it in a generous amount of paint. It doesn't make much sense, but it feels right. You don't think about anything in particular when your hand smears the color on the cavas, on the figure, a startling stroke right in the center of her chest, contrasting all of the dulls and darkness surrounding.
Though, you do think of him afterward. Of him and daffodils and spring.
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The rest of your friends are already present when you and Felix show up at Chan and Jess' shared apartment, holding boxes of pizzas and a case of beer.
It's a cute tradition that was started last year, when all of you promised to gather the final Friday of every month to have a cozy little dinner party among yourselves. It usually takes place at Chan's, since his apartment is bigger than the rest of yours, and because him and Jess are practically the parents of the group anyway.
The second you step into the living room, a chorus of groans erupts all around. Hyunjin and Jisung are the most vocal petulant babies, pouting from their seats, complaining that you two took too long and that they've been starving for hours.
You and Felix shrug off your jackets before delegating the tasks to the lot of them, since you were in charge of picking up the food for tonight. Minho and Seungmin grabbing plates and cups from the kitchen for Changbin and Jeongin to set on Chan's large coffee table.
You opt for a seat on the carpeted floor, next to the spot on the cream-colored couch where Minho left his phone, feeling more comfortable this way since the table is a little low for your liking. They come back a few minutes later, and you smile up at Minho when he reclaims his seat on the couch.
"Hi." He smiles back, smoothing a hand over your hair in greeting.
"Hi," you say. Even a touch so simple warms you up from the outside chill you were in mere minutes ago. No one else notices his lingering hand on you, or it's just such a you and Minho thing to be mildly affectionate with each other that the others don't care to comment on anymore.
You all fall into easy conversation soon after everyone starts digging in, chatting amongst yourselves as you always do. You and Hyunjin lament about your respective projects, reiterating the frustration that you've already expressed through your texts for the zillionth time. Chan and Jess nag Jeongin about introducing his girlfriend to the group, to which the younger one responds with an exaggerated groan as one would when their parents ask about grandchildren, though he does placate them by promising to bring her along the next time there's a party.
You don't care enough to tune into Minho's conversation with Changbin and Felix about the new gym they started going to. You do, however, catch Changbin's attempt to tease Minho. A playful scoff, followed by, "Minho lost his abs ages ago."
Your response is automatic and therefore, it doesn't warrant much thought from you before the words are tumbling out of your mouth. "No, he has abs. They're still there."
You don't recognize the weight of your words until you notice all chatter has halted, and you look up to find all eyes on you.
"How do you know that?" Jeongin is the one to voice everyone's collective thought, puzzled, a little surprised.
"Yeah, isn't Minho notoriously weird about that stuff?" Felix adds.
You blink in a daze, and you don't know if your face is reddening because of embarrassment but you sure hope that it isn't. The mouthful you're munching on gives you a reason to stall, your reputation of being a slow eater makes the excuse more believable when you don't answer right away.
As subtly as you can, you nudge Minho's leg with an elbow. He just laughs, though you're pretty certain he can tell that you're internally freaking out.
"I was walking her home from class a few weeks ago and we got caught in the rain. She let me come up to her apartment to change," he says calmly.
You remember that day. He was walking you from campus back to yours, so that part was true. But it didn't start raining until you were both sheltered in the comfort of your apartment, with him on top of you as he fucked you nice and slow on the couch. You didn't know when the rain stopped, but it must've been some time during your shower that you offered him to join with the innocent intention of cleaning yourselves up and saving water, only for him to end up on his knees with his face between your legs and his fingers buried deep inside of you. He'd made you come three times that afternoon, then took you out to udon afterward.
"And you just... changed in the middle of her living room or something?" Changbin asks, his eyes narrowing slightly.
Minho shrugs, completely nonchalant. "Yeah."
The silence in the room persists as you swallow down the bite. Their stare lingers on the pair of you, then they turn to look at each other like they're speaking a secret language that you're unfamiliar with. Why is it such a scandalous thing for you to see Minho without a shirt? You've seen your other guy friends shirtless numerous times before, when all of you are hanging out in someone's apartment on particularly hot summer days.
Though, they aren't wrong. The arrangement between the two of you muddles your memory, but you don't really remember seeing Minho flaunt his bare skin often before.
You're about to squeeze out a weak response to aid Minho's explanation, but your friends just start nodding along in acceptance.
"I guess that makes sense. If there's anyone who would see him naked, it'd be Y/N."
This definitely makes you blush. Minho laughs again.
"What?! I did not see him naked."
Well, look who's a liar now?
"Y/N, and whoever he's banging," Hyunjin supplies, which seriously doesn't help the flush on your cheeks at all.
"Why would it make sense that it was me?" you protest.
"Because you're his favorite." Jess is the one who answers, to which the rest of your friends all hum in agreement. The way they're reacting makes it seem as though it's just a fact of life that you're Minho's favorite, and that whatever boundary he lets you cross or whatever rule he breaks when it comes to you is simply a result of this fact.
Not once has it crossed your mind that everyone might have a favorite person in the group, but now that it's been said, you quickly conclude that Minho would be your favorite too (your secret arrangement notwithstanding.)
You glance up at him, seeking reassurance with a curious blink. "Am I?"
"You're alright," is what he tells you in lieu of a confirmation. "The least annoying one."
And you don't know if it's the way he speaks ever so gently when he looks at you or how his lips curl up in a knowing smile that sends a tingle of warmth down your spine. Or perhaps the culprit is the softness in his sharp eyes that makes you a little dizzy, makes a pair of butterflies go rampant at the pit of your stomach, as though they're prepared to soar when the ardor of spring begins to thaw the winter frost.
Chan laughs, "That's practically a declaration of love from Minho."
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At one point, Hyunjin looks around and comments with a mouth stuffed full of pizza, "Wow. We are literally perfectly divided."
All eyes fall onto him, clearly no one is catching his drift.
Hyunjin swallows his food and washes it down with a big sip of beer before gesturing vaguely at the group, "All the singles are on the floor."
You look at the people on the couch while they stare back at you, Hyunjin, Seungmin, Changbin and Felix sitting comfortably on the fluffy rug.
"I'm single," Jisung says, pointing at himself. "Should I get on the floor?"
"No, you're not," Seungmin says flatly.
"What?"
"Didn't you get back together with your ex girlfriend?"
"What?" Jisung practically squeaks out. "Man, what are you talking about?"
"I live with you. We literally share a wall. I heard you last week. The whole two hours."
“You were home?!”
"My shoes were by the door. I had dishes in the sink. I went to the bathroom to pee several times."
Jisung gasps, growing redder and redder as more eyes start diverting their attention to him. He opens his mouth only to promptly close it as he thinks of what to say. Repeats the process a few times. "We didn't hear you. You never said anything," is what he settles on stuttering out. Then, "Why didn't you bring it up? Why do you have to air out my dirty laundry now?"
"It's more entertaining to embarrass you in front of everyone." Seungmin shrugs, and ignores Changbin's subsequent comment calling him a pervert. "And no wonder you didn't hear me. You were going at it like you were rabid."
"Wait," Jeongin says, "when did you even get back together?"
"We didn't. It's complicated! We're just… y'know…"
When Jisung trails off sheepishly with the bright blush still apparent on his cheeks, Minho cuts in, finishing his sentence bluntly, "Boning."
You send him a glare from where you're seated on the floor, to which he just gives you a lopsided grin and nudges you with his knee.
While everyone else is busy bombarding Jisung with questions on potentially getting back together with his ex, Minho quietly slithers down to the floor like a stealthy cat, squeezing himself into the space between you and Felix. Minho rests his arm behind you on the couch, leaving it stretched out comfortably on the cushions, just lightly touching your back. Usually, when you two are alone, he would have his arm wrapped around your shoulders so he could pull you close, until you're safely tucked into his side where you would remain on most of your evenings spent together. But for now, he leaves his arm where it grazes you only slightly as you sit among friends, with the exception of his hand reaching to play with your hair once in a while.
"Hey!" Hyunjin practically screeches, pointing at Minho when he notices. "Why did you get on the floor?"
"What?" Minho asks innocently. "You said the singles are on the floor."
"You're not single. You have a girlfriend."
"I don't have a girlfriend."
Hyunjin scoffs. "You have a sneaky link."
"Hmm, not the same as a girlfriend."
"Why can't you just tell us, man? There's gotta be something else you're hiding."
You stay quiet, still as a statue while they bicker back and forth, like the mere motion of your breathing could give your secret away. You don't doubt that Hyunjin has been hounding Minho about his new discovery ever since the night of Yeonjun's party, but Minho seems unfazed about it, evading Hyunjin's badgering with a calm composure that's distinct to no one else.
You excuse yourself to the bathroom, quickly shuffling away as if your absence at the table would help make things seem less suspicious for Minho. You splash some water on your face, wait for a while until it feels like an appropriate amount of time has passed for them to have already moved onto another topic. You are, quite literally, hiding from your own friends.
Moments later, you re-enter the room with gentle footsteps and a certain tension in your spine, but you soon grow relieved when you find that the conversation has somehow shifted to Seungmin and his on-again off-again not-girlfriend, about which he just seems kinda sad for a few seconds before he's telling everyone to fuck off and mind their own business, always quick to conceal any and all emotions. He's similar to you in that way, you suppose.
You sit back down next to Minho who's still on the floor, though you put a little distance between your bodies that wasn't previously there. You don't know if it's enough to be noticeable, but he does look at you for a brief moment before leaning a bit closer, asking softly so only you could hear, "Walk you home later?"
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You embark on the familiar route from Chan and Jess' place back to yours. It's not that late, barely even 10PM on a Friday night, but the streets are almost deserted. Barely anyone tipsily roaming the streets with their friends in tow; just a few cars passing by every now and then. You relish in the peace and quiet, sighing softly to yourself as you walk in the crisp evening air.
Minho takes casual strides next to you, letting his hand brush against your hand for a while until his pinky finds its way around yours. The tranquility of the city is nice, but being with Minho is even nicer.
Just some of the stars have come out to play, though the way they gleam and glimmer is enough to make up for what they lack in numbers. It's easy to get lost tonight, when you're looking up at an infinite sky with little light and only Minho's pinky hooked around yours like an anchor to guide you back home.
In the grand scheme of things, you're just a speck of dust. You're young and confused - 23 is still a child in your mind - and most of all, you're insignificant. Not in a self-disparaging way. Maybe in the literal sense of the word would be more accurate.
You are insignificant, merely a face among billions of faces. In a crowd of hundreds, or maybe only dozens, you're not someone who would stand out and be picked. Sometimes, it's nice to blend right in and hide in plain sight; you don't particularly enjoy being under the spotlight anyway. But sometimes, it's lonely to be just a drop in the ocean. You could sink right to the bottom and no one would even notice.
Maybe that's why you enjoy being around Minho so much. He makes you feel safe, and seen, like you matter in the end. He makes you feel like if you were to disappear one day, there's a person out there who would go to the ends of the earth in search of you.
You hope that he sticks around, that he wants to be in your life for as long as you can have him. You're not sure what it is that makes you sick to your stomach at the mere thought of losing him; perhaps because you know you will never come across another one like Minho in your lifetime. There's nobody else that can make you feel the same way he does.
I don't want to lose you. You're the only good thing I have.
An intersection, two left turns, and your apartment building comes into view all too soon.
"Wanna come up?" you ask bashfully. The streetlights do a good job at masking your light flush.
"I can't tonight," he says, a little apologetic. "I'm going to my parents' house first thing in the morning."
"Oh." You're disappointed for no specific reason. Sure, you were practically glued to Minho's side for most of the evening, but you were also surrounded by the very friends who are unaware that you two have been sneaking around behind their backs. It's been about over a week since you hung out with him alone, which isn't that long ago by any means, but still. "For the weekend?"
"Yeah, just for the weekend."
There's a selfish urge, just a tiny one, to ask him to come for a while anyway, maybe only twenty minutes or so, but you swallow it down and wave it away. "Okay, have fun. Say hi to the cats for me."
"I'll send you pictures," he tells you. "They miss you, y'know."
You smile at that, laughing a little. "They've met me once."
Last fall, you and your friends all took a weekend trip to Minho's childhood home for his birthday. It was fun for you, though you're not sure how much his parents actually enjoyed it, considering they had to house and feed almost a dozen kids that weren't their own. You remember the cats, of course you do, and how Soonie took an immediate liking to you, how he mostly hovered around your personal space whenever you were in the house.
"No, seriously. My mom says Soonie meows your name once a day."
You throw him an eye roll, accompanied by a light punch to his shoulder.
"Goodnight, Min," you say. "Text me when you get home."
"Okay."
Even after that, the two of you still stay rooted to the spot, your pinkies interlocked. Minho's gaze doesn't leave your face, and for a moment there, it feels like most of the stars didn't show up because they all left to gather in his eyes.
"Can't go up if you don't let me,” you quip, glancing at your hands, knowing full well that you can easily retract your finger if you want to.
His eyes stay on you for just a moment longer. "Let me kiss you," he asks softly, releasing your pinky only to take your hand in his, tugging you closer until you’re all up in each other's personal space.
You blink at him, your heart caught somewhere in your throat. You're close enough that you can feel the warmth radiating off his body. "Min…" you murmur but you don't actually know what you want to tell him, so the nickname hangs like an idle lantern in the bubble of space between your faces.
"Just a goodnight kiss."
"Friends don't kiss," you say meekly, reminiscent of your conversation over a week ago.
"Friends don't have sex either," he repeats.
"But we’re not having sex."
"You asked me to come upstairs. What do you think we would've done?"
And he's right. If he had agreed to come up, then you would probably be pressed against the door right now, with his hands trailing down your body, removing every article of clothing they find, his lips kissing every exposed patch of skin along the way.
Minho would've been kissing you regardless - anywhere and everywhere, and you wouldn't have had any qualms about it like you do right now, even though you want to kiss him too.
"Maybe I wanted you to come up to make you peel tangerines for me while we watch a movie."
He says nothing to that, only grins amusedly and leans in to nudge his nose against yours. It's so cute that you can't help but mirror the quirk of his lips. You're sure that no one else gets to see this version of him - the one that boops you like an overly affectionate cat and smiles like you're his favorite person not just in your little group, but in the whole wide world.
"I haven't kissed you all week," he murmurs, his voice so gentle in the quietude that surrounds you. "You were right there but I couldn't kiss you all night."
You lose yourself in his brown eyes, the same eyes that hold nothing but sincerity and fondness for you. The stars here are brighter than the ones overhead.
"Let me kiss you," Minho says, "please?"
You cave. Of course you do.
The first glide of his lips over yours has you weak in the knees. Something sinks in as he kisses you deeply. Under the streetlights, not surrounded by your familiar four walls like a long lost secret but out in the open where anyone can see, even though there's not a single soul around.
Tears well up behind your eyelids the same way they did that morning you woke up next to him for the first time. You don't know what it is, never felt this way around anyone except for him. It's akin to the feeling of finally coming home after being away for a long time, or at least that's what you think that's how it would feel.
You don't want to be caged in by the walls of your own making. You want to be seen, and you want to be seen by him. You're the remnants of snow and ice stuck between cracks in the sidewalk, and he is warmth. You're a mosaic of a daffodil garden caught in an endless winter, and he is spring. Minho is the brief but wonderful moment when cherry blossoms have yet to fall from their branches, but green leaves are already growing impatiently, resulting in the beautiful coexistence of pinks and greens if only just for a few days.
You let him kiss you until you're both out of breath, let him wrap his strong arms around your body and hold you like he could mend all of your broken pieces. Maybe he could. Maybe you'd like him to make you whole again.
When Minho pulls away, he doesn't stray very far. He puts enough distance between your faces so you can catch your breath. But even then, you have a hard time getting air back into your lungs. He's looking at you like he would pick the moon for you if you asked, like moving mountains is no more difficult than peeling tangerines for you whenever you get a craving.
The streetlights are dim, but the stars in his eyes are bright enough to tell you something that his words don't.
It hits you all at once, in a moment where even the wind is still, as if it's been reduced to a mere spectator, watching the two of you with bated breath on the sidelines. The tipping point can be something as simple as him asking - almost pleading - to kiss you goodnight with no ulterior motive, no other intention than because he wants to. As though it would kill him if he had to go another minute without kissing you.
You realize why he's the yellow to your sea of blues, why you're so happy every time you look at the bracelet on your wrist. You realize why you feel so safe around him, why he makes you experience emotions that no one else can. You realize why you don’t like hearing about Hana, or any other person in the same sentence as his name with the implication that he could be romantically involved with them.
You realize why you kissed him for the first time all those months ago, and it wasn't because you were sad and he just happened to be there and let you cry on his shoulder. The times that your friends would tell you how you and Minho would be perfect together - you wanted it to be true. You knew it was true - that he was someone you could love, the only person who's worth opening up to. You kissed him because you wanted to love him. You realize why it made you soar when he kissed you back, because you wanted him to love you too.
You realize why the thought of losing this friendship terrifies you. You realize why you asked him to stay that night after the party and the club, even though you had never allowed him to sleep over before. You realize why the other week you let him only kiss you and nothing else, and you realize why your heart is hammering in your chest this very second, why your knees are weak, why you can't really breathe here in the middle of an empty street under a moonless sky, just because he's looking at you as if it's not the sun that the earth revolves around but rather, it's a girl who has never learned how to say what she means.
You're good at leaving things alone; it's a skill that you've unintentionally mastered over the years. Nothing has to change if you let it remain the same. And yet, the one exception always seems to be Minho, and you're a mirror of yourself when you're with him. You like the version of you that only he's able to bring out, and he does it effortlessly every time. He pulls happiness out of you so easily that it's hard to ignore what you feel for him, hard to convince yourself that what you harbor for him is still only platonic affection.
It comes bubbling up to the surface without your permission. It strikes you the same way lightning splits open the whole sky on a cloudless night, abrupt and unmistakeable. Love isn't something that you've ever come close to, and you have always been an unbeliever when people answer "You just know," in response to "How do you know when it is love?"
Though as you stand right here, right now, you think maybe this is what love is supposed to look like, personified with starry eyes and shallow dimples when he smiles.
Before he leaves, Minho presses another sweet kiss to your cheek. You're still dazed by the dawning, overwhelmed by the recognition that you can only mutter a stupid "Bye," when he bids you good night.
As you watch him go, there's something else you realize, almost tragically, that you've always been a ruiner. You run away the moment shit starts getting too real, even if it means letting beautiful things slip through your fingers like running water.
Love just isn't something you've ever learned to hold.
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all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 15.04.2024]
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3rachaslut · 5 months ago
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SMUT ! MINORS DNI ! dom!changbin X sub!reader femme
cw: slapping, degradation, pet names (slut, whore etc), rough, choking, jealousy, dom/sub dynamic
this has been sat in my drafts for about 8 months lol (i’ve proof read about 4 times but i got bored so i’m sorry for any mistakes there may be)
EVERYTHING WRITEN IS CONSENSUAL ON BOTH PARTS
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It was 11:45pm and you, Changbin, Chan and Jisung had been in the studio since 6:30pm. Mumbles could be heard in front of you, although you wasn’t really listening, sipping on your iced coffee to keep you awake. You never was any help work wise in the studio but your boyfriend Changbin and the boys loved having you around and you loved it too.
“Y/n” Jisung called over to you and you whipped your head to look at him. “Listen to this bridge, what do you think is missing?”. You made your way towards him, taking the headphones and sitting gently on his knee. Changbin shot daggers in yours and Jisung’s direction. His glare on the both of you caused a smirk to tug on your lips, although jisung didn’t notice.
You readjust yourself, grabbing onto the sides of the chair, lifting yourself up and gently back down onto his lap again. You listen to the recording, feigning innocence as you slowly push yourself backwards into Jisung’s lap, causing him to cough and attempting to hide the slight moan he just let out. You spin idly side to side on the chair and the friction from you moving over his crotch was causing a reaction from Jisung and you felt it straight away. You smirk as you turn your head from the recording to face Jisung and rais your eyebrows. He taps either side of your waist twice, indicating you to get off his lap. He clears his throat. “Sorry guys, I’ll be right back, I just need to use the bathroom. Two seconds”. He quickly walks out of the studio, praying his friends didn’t notice the tent forming in his joggers.
You briefly look Changbin’s way and his death glare on Jisung never left his eyes, only when he was out the door to the studio did he tilt his head to look at you. You shrug in faux confusion as he looks at you with narrow eyes, causing a sly smile to form on your lips.
“Okay so.. any ideas y/n?” Chan asks, looking at you with tired eyes and Changbin interjects. “Chan hyung, we’ve been at this for hours! I say we go home, get some rest and come back to it tomorrow with a clear mind”.
“Yeah okay, let’s call it a night” Chan begins to pack his stuff and you feel Changbin’s threatening eyes back on you. You make your way to the sofa and sip on your iced coffee, pulling out your phone.
“Night guys, I’ll text Ji and let him know we’re heading home so don’t wait up for him” Chan says, walking out the studio, leaving you and your boyfriend alone. Changbin barely waits until the door was closed until he shoots up off his chair and marches over to you. Hearing his footsteps getting closer, a smirk makes its way on your lips.
“What the fuck was that y/n?!” He spits out as his form towers over you and his fierce aura makes you shift slightly in your seat.
“What?” You ask, faking innocence and still staring at your phone. “I don’t know what you mean”. You shake your head in confusion as you continue to look down, too scared to look at him.
“Don’t play fucking dumb y/n! You know exactly what you did! Acting like that much of a whore around my bandmates that Ji had to excuse himself. Fucking slut” He says with narrow eyes and a feigned disgusted look on his face.
“I’m talking to you y/n..” Changbin says sternly, grabbing your chin and forces you to look at him. “When I talk to you, you fucking look. at. me.” He emphasises his words with a slap across the face, causing you to whimper slightly at the sudden pain but you couldn’t ignore the way your clit throbbed from the sting on your cheek. You giggle at him, the brat in you loving this. He shakes his head at you in disapproval.
“Slut” he says, throwing you backwards onto the sofa. He towers over you and puts his hand around your throat, adding just enough pressure for you to let out a strained moan.
“Stupid girl… you would have thought you’d know better by now..” Your eyes rapidly scan his face sensing a ‘punishment’ was incoming, although Changbin’s punishments only ever had you internally begging for more.
Changbin roughly grabs both your legs and practically throws you sideways so you are lying down on the sofa. He yanks your skirt up towards your tummy and rips your panties off, tossing them somewhere onto the floor.
“We won’t be needing them, will we doll?” He says with a chuckle. He forcefully parts your legs so your were spread out right in front of him, your breath hitching at the sudden air against your clit. You look away from him in shame at being so exposed when your boyfriend was still fully clothed.
“Such a pretty pussy” Changbin coos whilst his fingers brush over your sensitive clit, rubbing small circles and making you writhe in pleasure.
“Let’s see how red I can make it baby, hmm?” He laughs as your eyes widen, already knowing the punishment you were about to receive. His words were quickly followed by a firm slap to your pussy, making your whole body jolt. You let out a gasp from the sudden, intense stimulation. Changbin was always so brutal with this specific punishment, so you certainly knew the pain and pleasure you was about to endure.
“’m sorry sir! Didn’t mean to! I’ll be good!” you frantically beg. Changbin laughs and quickly dismisses your pleas by delivering another harsh slap to your pussy and you squirm underneath him. Your face contorts from the torment and you moan loudly.
“Not so fucking bold now, are you little girl?” He says with a sadistic look on his face, teasingly rubbing over your sensitive clit making you whine. “I expected you to know what happens when you act like a whore around my friends baby but clearly you don’t listen” He delivered a particularly harsh slap to your pussy that elicited a loud moan from you, practically verging on a scream.
“FUCK” you cry out as tears begin to fall from your eyes. You throw your head back in fear of the next slap you were about to receive.
“Language baby” Changbin shakes his head in disapproval and raises his hand again. You flinch and squeeze your eyes as you lay in expectation of the next blow. But it never came. Confused, you lift your head off the sofa armrest and saw Changbin staring at you with a mischievous grin.
“Aw… cute” He says smirking. Another slap landed on your sensitive pussy and you squeak in pain.
“You love this don’t you? Fucking whore” He says, a look of faux disgust on his face.
“No ssir… h- ’hurtss” you whimper, panting in between words as you try to catch your breath.
“Really? Are you sure?” He takes two fingers and eagerly thrusts them into your soaked cunt, making you gasp at the intrusion then moan in pleasure. “Because your pussy is telling me you’re lying darling” He slowly speeds up his movements in your cunt and your mouth falls open as he starts to curl his fingers inside you. Your legs begin to lift upwards and close together in an attempt to make his fingers go deeper inside you. You begin to writhe in your spot, moaning uncontrollably.
“Legs” Changbin barks, instructing you to keep your legs open wide and low.
You groan in frustration and your legs began to tremble involuntary as you whine from the pleasure.
“Such a naughty girl... You’re dripping all over my fingers from getting your little pussy abused.” He laughs. “What a fucking slut” He emphasises the last word with another brutal slap to your clit that was now pulsing more than ever. You cry out and your legs automatically close together from the sudden pain.
“Y/n I swear to god, if you don’t keep those fucking legs spread, I’ll take this belt off and whip that little clit with it so hard over and over again, you’ll be sobbing for hours. Now.. keep those legs OPEN!” You flinch at his raised voice and he grips your knee with his hand, pushing it down towards the sofa.
You squirm in place as you try your best to keep your legs spread however, you feel that familiar knot forming in your stomach and you know you’re close to squirting.
“Sir! M’ close!” you yell out, your eyes scrunching together. Changbin didn’t say a word back to you instead, his fingers speeding up inside your pussy. He smirks at the scene if front of him, admiring the state he’s put you in. He takes his fingers from his unoccupied hand and rubs little circles on your clit, smirking at the scene of your body writhing underneath him.
“oh, FUCK. Bin i’m gonna come”.
“Beg.” he instructs and you do. You want nothing more than to come undone underneath him and you were prepared to throw away all your dignity right now to get it.
“Please! Please let me come! I’ll be so good, i won’t flirt with your friends anymore- ah! Ever again just please! Fuck- please let me c- cu-“ Your body is jolting uncontrollably and you’re sure you looked a state. Changbin brings his face just inches away from yours, tantalising close.
“Come for me baby” He whispers.
You scream out a thank you as you squirted over his hand, your chest heaving up and down as you try to catch your breath.
“Oh baby, you made a mess all over my hand. What do you say?” He tuts, eyebrows raised.
“Sorry I made a mess sir” you say pouting.
“And?”
“Thank you for making me cum sir”
“Good girl” He says approvingly, kissing you and grabbing your panties from the floor beside you and wiping his hand clean with them. He cups your face with his hand and rubs at your cheek.
“My beautiful girl.. I’m so proud of you. Come here” He brings you into a warm hug and you melt into his arms, smiling. As much as you loved Changbin’s punishments, you also loved his affectionate aftercare that followed, making sure you’re okay.
“I knew flirting with your friends would get me in trouble. Clearly my plan worked..” You chuckle into his chest.
“Such a brat.” He smiles and shakes his head. “Are you okay? That wasn’t too much?”
“Binnie, it was amazing!” He lifts your face to look at him and brings you into a gentle kiss, pecking your lips over and over again.
“Come on baby, let’s go home”
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owliellder · 1 year ago
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All Pent Up
MDNI 18+
Puppy Hybrid! Leon Kennedy x afab! Reader
Word count: 3.85k
Warnings: Porn w/ plot, unprotected p in v (stay safe), no use of y/n, spanking, crying, slight ass-play.
Description: After a long night at work, you come home to a very pent up Leon. A trip to the park to help with that energy turns a little sour.
Tags: Submissive! Leon, neck biting/marking, begging, cunnilingus, knotting, mommy kink, fluff, near illegal amounts of praise AND aftercare, a lovely creampie to end the morning
Not proofread. I am once again sat here bored at work. More self indulgence since I work the same kind of job aforementioned in this lmao.
Also VERY much inspired by @abp0rns art of puppy Leon, specifically the two I put below the crop. Please check out their art they gotta be one of my favorite doodlers out there.
Edit: cross posted onto Ao3 if it's easier for you to read there (cause it is for me)
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It had been an incredibly boring night at work for you. Working graveyard at a gatehouse meant you did practically nothing. Easy money, sure, but you can only watch so many movies and doodle so much before it becomes redundant.
The only thing keeping you going was making sure your puppy, Leon, stayed happy and comfortable. You'd found him at the shelter a few months back, and though you never considered yourself to be a hybrid kinda person, Leon was just too damn cute at that shelter.
After adopting the hybrid, you quickly fell into a nice afterwork routine; come home, get jumped by Leon, make breakfast while he asked a plethora of questions about your night and made sure you knew just how much he missed you by licking and slobbering all over you. He was the sweetest boy, but man was he excitable.
Some mornings, you'd come home a bit more awake than others. It was random and you're not sure what made that so, but today was apparently one of those days.
~
"-sosososo glad you're home, mommy! I've been so lonely and bored without you!" Leon happily talked on after you'd walked through the door, his golden fur covered tail thumping loudly against the back of the couch. You remained quiet as you let him ramble, reaching up to pet through his messy bedhead with a smile. "I chewed on my toys, broke one of the squeakers though, but you've gotten me plenty of other toys for me to play with!! I really like this fluffy red pig you got me-!"
He continued to talk loudly about everything he did after you left for work only 8 hours prior, running around to grab and show you his chewed up toy and his favorite toy, tail continuing to wag avidly all the while.
"Alright, alright.. settle down, Leon.." You spoke up, cutting off his talk about laying in your bed so you could take a moment to shed your work clothes in favor of some more comfortable lounge wear; an old, faded graphic tee and a pair of soft sweatpants.
The hybrid followed you throughout the apartment while continuing to ramble, albeit a lot quieter now. Clearly Leon had a lot of energy this morning, which wasn't unusual by any means, but since you weren't all that tired this morning you decided that a trip to the dog park would be a good way for him to get some much needed exercise and enrichment.
After making breakfast, you dressed your puppy in a cozy outfit since it was always little chilly in the mornings where you lived, damn cold desert. You only had to reach for the leash for him to start jumping and yapping enthusiastically, making it rather difficult to hook it onto his collar.
You decided to stay in your comfy clothes, seeing as it would keep you warm enough until the sun warmed the air outside.
"Do you think Chris will be there?! Can you text his owner?? Who else is gonna be there?! I can smell the park from here!-" Leon rambled excitedly as he tugged you along to the park, smelling every bush and tree the two of you passed thoroughly. His tail never stopped wagging, those soft floppy ears perked forwards as he moved his head every which way, focusing in on every movement and sound while beelining to the park. He knew the way there, the leash was just to make sure you didn't get lost.
The air was cool the, sun beginning to warm you up. It was starting to bring out your exhaustion, but you wanted Leon to get at least half an hour of playtime in so he wouldn't bug you while you slept later. The thought alone made it easy for you to power through that brain fog that threatened to settle in.
You and Leon walked across the street once the tall chainlink fence that bordered the dog park was in view, the Golden Retriever hybrid practically dragging you to the other side of the street as his excitement grew. There were always other hybrids out early in the morning, the cool mornings were nicer for walks compared to the hot afternoons, at least in your opinion.
Leon was rubbing himself along the side of the fence, sniffing with a large goofy smile on his face. He had playmates that were normally here around this time, namely Chris, a German Shepard hybrid. Though Chris was a little bigger than Leon, they always played nicely, never having gotten into any sort of scuffle.
Chris was quick to notice Leon, running up to the fence so he could sniff him. They rapidly got each other riled up, so the moment you made it to the gate you unhooked the leash from Leon's collar. This wasn't so he didn't get choked out when he launched into the park, no, it was because the last time you forgot to unhook his leash first, you were yanked face first into soggy grass and mud.
The second you unlatched the gate, Leon pushed it open. He sprinted into the grassy park, Chris not far behind before tackling the smaller hybrid with a playful growl. The two roughhoused, chased each other, and played tug-of-war with a stick Chris had found.
You decided to sit on a bench not too far from where the boys played, looking up from your phone every minute or so to make sure their play didn't turn ugly.
Only 30 minutes had gone by before- "Mommy! Mommy!" Leon shouted from across the park, prompting you to look up from your phone. It only took a moment for your eyes to nearly bulge out of your head when you spotted a now brown Leon. His tail wagged, slapping loudly against the thick puddle of mud he was laying sideways in. "Looklooklook! Chris and I found a ball!" he yelled with a grin, Chris holding up the muddy ball high in the air so you could see it.
You sat there dumbfounded for a brief moment before letting your head fall back, breathing in and letting out a deep sigh as your eyes closed. You tilted your head forwards again, letting your eyes open slowly as your annoyance showed clear on your face.
Your puppy could see your expression change even from where he was, his ears drooping more than they were as the mud had weighed them down a bit. Seems like playtime was over.
Chris' owner wasn't all that happy either, walking over to the filthy hybrids only a few seconds sooner than you did. You pulled Leon from the mud by the collar since he seemed a bit stuck, glaring weakly at the now cowering puppy.
"Leon is always getting Chris into some sort of mess." Chris' owner huffed out, clearly irritated with the situation. You frowned, running your free hand over your face with a soft sigh. "I'm sorry, Leon just seems to really like the mud lately. I can't help that Chris follows, but I'll try to keep Leon from the mud." You didn't really care for someone implying your Golden Retriever puppy was a bad dog, but the idea of confrontation mixed with your ever-growing exhaustion was enough to have you just let it go.
After apologizing again, you let Leon shake off the excess mud from his body before hooking the leash to his collar once more, beginning to pull him towards the gate. He was very resistant to leaving, whining and whimpering something fierce. "I'm sorry! ImsorryImsorry! Please I'll be good! Let me stay a little longer mommy! Please I'm sorry! Mommy!"
As pitiful as he sounded, you now had to squeeze a thorough bath in for the hybrid before you were even able to think about sleeping. You continued to drag him along as he fought against you, crying out softly as you finally got him through the gate, closing it before he could run back through.
Your exhaustion was making you irritable, and having to fight to get Leon back home was enough to make you angry. It got even worse when he growled at you.
You stopped walking, the entrance to your apartment building only a few feet away. Turning around to face him, he immediately shrunk down at your furious glare. "Bad boy, Leon." Your voice was harsh, yet also so calm, it scared him. He hated being a bad boy, he never wanted to hear those words together again.
After you started walking again, he followed obediently, staying silent all the way into your apartment. He stood stiffly by the front door once you closed it, watching you stomp away. The puppy was on the verge of tears, his muddy tail tucked between his legs and his ears flat against his head.
Leon's bottom lip trembled the longer he couldn't see you, his ears twitching a bit as he picked up on the sound of the bath faucet turning on. His hands were clasped in front of his legs, head down in shame.
"Leon!" You called out from the bathroom, your tone still laced with irritation, he could definitely tell that much. The hybrid quickly shuffled to the bathroom, trying his best not to get clumps of dried up mud on the carpet along the way.
Leon stood in the bathroom doorway before you gently dragged him in, making silent work of his clothes that were absolutely caked in mud. He knew what to do afterwards, quietly seating himself in the bath, shoulders slumped. The bath was silent except for Leon's weak attempts to apologize, his voice faltering every time once he looked at your face. Your eyebrows were furrowed and you just looked so disinterested.
After the bath, you shooed the puppy off with a towel draped over his shoulders, lazily washing off his collar in the dirty bath water before unplugging the tub.
Leon sat in the living room, drying himself off as best as he could with the towel. Even after, he shook himself off on instinct, the towel left discarded on the floor. He had sat himself on the couch, still slouched with a strong pout on his face.
He knew he was in trouble. His stomach sank when you walked out and stood in front of him with that same irritated look. You then walked and sat next to him on the left. "Lay across my lap, Leon."
The Golden Retriever hybrid whimpered, though he did as he was told, laying himself so his abdomen was laying on your lap, his tail still tucked between his legs. He yipped when you grabbed the base of his damp tail with your left hand, roughly untucking it so you could get a clear view of his ass. "Look at me, Leon."
He turned his head and tilted it back slightly so he could look up at you, his eyes sad and watery. He didn't have anything to say for himself. "You growled at me. You've never growled at me before." You sounded upset, and you were. You didn't want to punish your sweet boy, but him growling at you for something so insignificant deeply bothered you.
Sighing, you pulled his tail up away from his ass even further, grip tightening on it as you felt him try and tuck it back between his legs again. Wordlessly, you drew your other hand back, a sharp smack along with a cry from Leon ringing out in the quiet apartment. You hated having to do this, but he needed to learn.
A few harsh spanks later and the hybrid's ass was bright red and sore, tears spilling down his face as he sobbed out barely comprehensible apologizes in between loud cries every time you brought your hand down on his tender behind. His hands gripped the couch cushion tightly, those pitiful sobs of his tugging at your heart.
Once you feel Leon'd learned his lesson, you gently ran your hand along both his ass cheeks, soothing the hot and red skin while your other hand caressed the base of his tail. You waited until his crying quieted to talk to him again, listening to him sniffle wetly as you let go of his tail to wipe away his snot and tears.
"Okay, okay... there you go, sweet boy. All done. I'm all done..." you whispered to the whimpering puppy hybrid in your lap, shifting your body sideways so he could climb up and lay his head against your chest. You combed your fingers through his hair with one hand while the other stroked the side of his face, clearing the few stray tears that continued to fall.
Leon buried his face into your chest, hiccuping out muffled apologies as he brought his hands up to wrap around you. "I'm sorry mommy. So-.. sososo sorry... Didn't mean to, mommy..."
As he trembled against you, you couldn't help but feel terrible for punishing him that way. He'd never been bad before, the punishment really shouldn't have been so harsh..
You waited until he quieted to speak up again, tilting your head to the side slightly so you could see his face a little better. "...you took that so well, Leon. Such a good boy for mommy, huh?" Despite the suggestive undertone, you made sure to talk softly, careful not to upset the delicate puppy on your chest.
He lifted his head up slightly, nodding weakly as his eyes turned glassy once more. "Please.. I'll-I'll be a good boy for you m-mommy. I'm sorry- I'm so so sorry mommy- I didn't mean to growl- ImsorryImsorryIm-"
You shushed him, running your hand from the side of his face up through his hair as he began to cry again. "You're a good boy, Leon. I forgive you, baby.."
All Leon wanted to do was make this right. He never wanted to be a bad boy again. He hated the way you spoke to him, the way you had looked at him. It was so scary, he wasn't a bad boy, no, he wasn't.
His mind was flooded with everything he could possibly do to make it up to you, tears falling onto your shirt as he pulled himself up off of you. He crawled backwards and sat back on his haunches, giving you a wary look as he tucked his fingers under the waistband of your sweatpants.
"Oh, Leon, sweetheart, you don't have to-" "Please..." Leon's meek voice cut you off, making you pause for a moment before nodding with a smile. His hands trembled as he pulled your sweatpants down, taking your panties with them. The hybrid hiccuped again before bringing his head down between your thighs, putting your legs over his shoulders as he cautiously placed his hands onto the points of your hips
It only took a second before he shoved his face into your cunt, whimpering at your smell and taste as he licked between your folds. You gasped, feeling his tongue eagerly lap up your slick as it leaked out of you, his low whimpers vibrating deliciously against you. "Leon~... oh~.. easy, boy..."
You reached a hand down to gently stroke his hair, attempting to get the puppy hybrid to calm down a bit still. He was obviously so eager to please, though he was still shaken up by the punishment; tears falling from his eyes, quiet sobs muffled by your pussy, eyes closed, and cheeks flushed a beautiful pink. His tail had started to wag again and you were relieved to see it sway slowly. You just wanted to see your puppy happy and excitable again like he always was.
Leon continued to lap at your cunt, keeping himself firmly buried in it. His breathing was a bit shaky but you just let him do what he needed to do, reaching your hand to the right a bit so you could stroke one of his soft floppy ears. He sighed at the feeling, his tail wagging a little faster.
"That's a good boy, Leon~... god- such a good boy for his mommy.." You praised the hybrid as he worked his mouth on you, the praise causing him to whine into your cunt. His eyes peaked open, looking up at you as small tears fell from them. "Good boy~..." You ran your hand down to stroke your thumb between his eyes, prompting him to close them again with a sigh.
Your words encouraged him further, sucking at your clit when his tongue wasn't buried inside of you. The puppy hybrid licked all around, making sure none of your sweet slick was left to waste. He eased his grip on your hips, partially worried he would hurt you, but mostly cause he adored the way you writhed when you drew close to your orgasm. He relished in how you pulled his head impossibly closer, practically grinding against his face, using him. What a good boy he was.
Leon was in heaven when you came, whimpering into your cunt as you gushed against his face. He made sure to lick up everything he could, even dipping down to your ass for a minute, tongue flat against the puckered hole. He'd be mad if he saw the couch got some of your juices.
After a moment, he pulled his head away, resting the side of his slick covered face against your thigh as he looked up at you with those puppy-dog eyes that you just couldn't resist. You knew what he wanted, and who were you to deny him?
"My good boy wanna fuck his mommy? Show his mommy what a good boy he is?" You whispered, to which he eagerly nodded in response, his ears perking up. You could hear his tail thump lazily against the back cushion of the couch, all the while watching him lick his lips. "I-I'll be a good boy for mommy. I'm a good boy-..good boy for mommy.." he mumbled quietly, hoisting himself up onto his haunches again after carefully laying your legs down off his shoulders. His thick cock was leaking pre-cum, flushed red at the tip while his knot was fully swollen. It was hard to look away.
Leon continued to mumble to himself, almost like he was trying to convince himself that he was a good boy. His breathing was still shaky as he watched you flip over, your ass up in the air while you rested your elbows on the armrest of the couch.
The poor thing was practically drooling at the sight of you, frozen in place, just staring at your glistening pussy. Your voice snapped him out of his trance, a hushed "Pretty boy..." causing him to lurch forward and mount you without further hesitation.
You cried out as he shoved his cock into you halfway, stopping only to grab the skin right above your collarbone with his teeth. He made sure he was positioned properly, shifting slightly before pushing his throbbing dick all the way. He whined at the way your slick walls gripped him, his knot pressed firmly against the outside of your cunt.
Leon's teeth broke skin as he began to piston in and out of you. He was drooling, whimpering, moaning, and his tail was wagging so fast. He loved the way his mommy felt, gripping his so tightly, sucking his thick cock in.
His let go of your skin to lick at gently, which was a stark contrast to his fast and rough thrusts. "So sorry mommy- sososo sorry.. never growl at you again- ah~..! I-I'll be mommy's good-.. good boy.."
The hybrid panted next to your ear, reaching his hands up and under your loose shirt to grip and massage your breasts. His fingers pinched and tugged at your sensitive nipples, causing you to moan loudly. You could feel every bit of his cock as he slammed it into you over and over again, the tip kissing your cervix which made you hiss at the slight pain it caused.
"Gonna- hnghh~.. gonna fill mommy up.. gonna be mommy's best boy again..." Leon whined, tilting his head to the side so he could nip at your neck, kissing and licking under your jaw. He sucked numerous hickeys down your neck, making quick work of the other side as well. He wanted you to remember how good he was for you, how much he was willing to do to make things better, what a good boy he was for you.
It didn't take long for him to near his own orgasm, his chin resting over your shoulder as his hands had worked their way back to your hips. He was so close; the sounds of your moans, the sinful way your pussy squelched with slick as he fucked into you, your smell, the lingering taste of you on his tongue, everything was just so overwhelming.
The puppy hybrid didn't have the words to give you warning, only a long drawn out whine as his hips stuttered forward, knot stretching you open. You came again from the feeling, barely being able to clench around his knot. It was just so big.
With his cum pumping into you, you could only groan pleasantly at the feeling of being so full, his knot having basically plugged you to the point that none of it could escape.
You could partially register Leon running his hands up and down your body, anywhere he could reach in his position, bunching up your shirt in the process. His large hands felt nice, helping you come down from your high. He was whispering something, you couldn't make out what, but it was probably the same thing he'd been spewing before.
~
After Leon was able to pull out of you, you made sure to reassure him over and over that he was your good boy, and he'd always be your good boy.
You made him a little snack once you'd cleaned yourself and him up, seeing as the park and your at-home playtime had influenced his appetite quite a bit. You loved to see him happy again; those beautiful blue eyes crinkled with a smile as that fluffy tail of his wagged.
Your body finally realized how tired it was once more, your brain catching up with that as well. You waved Leon, who was elated to follow you, into your room, practically bounding in like a deer. He begged to lay the way you two did on the couch, and again, who were you to deny him?
You laid back, head on your pillow as Leon nestled himself on top of you. He laid his head on your chest, turning his head to the left as he rested his arms on either side of you, his hands just barely tucked up under your pillow after pulling the blankets up over the both of you.
"You're the greatest boy anyone could ask for, Leon. Always taking such good care of me.." you whispered as his eyes closed, his tail going from a lazy wag to a stop as he fell asleep.
"I love you, my sweet boy.."
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maryleclerc · 1 year ago
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𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧
pairing: charles leclerc x reader ; carlos sainz x reader
face-claim: gigi hadid
summary: in which after knowing about reader pregnancy, charles decided to make everything right.
warning: mention of pregnancy, exes!, paparazzi. use google translate,swearing. english is not my native language! does not have any pregnancy experience!
so i’ll made this mini series with 2 ending, one will be reader end with charles and other one will end with carlos (ofc if reader end up with carlos which mean the reason why reader and charles broke up will change too)
more importantly: reader you can suggest any baby girl name too!! or baby boy idk 😩🙏 also suggest some drama and stuff ideas!!
if you wanted to add into taglist please reply or dm me
read part 01
yourusername
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yourusername With my bestie! @/carlossainz55
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carlossainz55 Bestieeee
yewenmitle Love their friendship already!!!
roseross How can they be so cute not even trying
⤷ yourusername Born natural 🥸
dailypaparazzi
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dailymail Y/n Y/l/n and Carlos Sainz spotted having a cozy dinner in Monaco
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friendsaddictedd Oooh sound ✨ROMANTIC✨
kiearre She looks serious tho, her face
livinginthedprm Everybody saying Carlos has a crush on Y/n. HE DESERVE TO BE LOVE TOO!! they would be so cute together
f1lovelifeupdates
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f1lovelifeupdates Charles Leclerc has confirmed that he and Megan have broken up a months ago, after 2 months of dating. And he also confirmed that his ex-girlfriend, Y/n, is pregnant with their first child.
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haileylee Ok, I don’t really care about them… all I need to know is Charles know about the baby?
charlessbaby I missed them so much!!!
ppeeeepss Megan, she’s wonderful, pretty and talent how can this happen. I just hope he’s not get back with Y/n
⤷ lovensfw Honey, we know but he’s a grown man so I think it is very important to know what’s ‘responsibility’ mean 😀 also Y/n’s PERFECTLY FINE!!!
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yourusername 👶👩‍🍼💞
Hello everyone!
Recently, there have been photos of me and of course, photos of me pregnant that were unintentionally leaked. And that's also the reason why I spoke up about this, (why do I sound so serious, haha) anyway, it's been a while and it's time to share with you guys.
Since you love me, you deserve me to share your joys with you. Yes, I'm pregnant and my baby is 8 months old!! time flies, since the day I announced that I would take a temporary break for a while because I felt OVERWHELM, that actually was the time I wanted to devote all my time to taking care of myself as well as my baby, prepare to be a mommy. And I am truly grateful to all of you who have sent me kind words and wishes, I truly appreciate it!!
Love you all so much! Also, I still don't know what to name our baby, so I need your suggestions
IT’S A GIRL!! (reader also can suggest a name too!!)
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lolamckaylee Congrat to you Y/n
_josephinee Who’s the baby daddy?
⤷ ynsqueen It’s Charles Leclerc
⤷ _josephinee Wait I thought he dating someone else, and knock her up?
⤷ johnsongreen HIM AND MEGAN BROKE UP!!
carlossainzstuff_
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carlossainzstuff_ Carlos has mention Y/n on today “We asked Carlos Sainz what F1 fan really want to know” by P1 with Matt & Tommy.
Tommy asked Carlos if he knew that F1 fans were very curious about the relationship between Carlos and Y/n after the photos taken by paparazzi when they spend sometime at Monaco.
TOMMY: Did you know that every F1 fan here wanted to know if you and Y/n are a thing?
CARLOS: We’re bestfriend, bff
TOMMY: But there are also had that one question that has been ask alot that’s “Are having a crush on Y/n?”
CARLOS: It’s really hard to not fall for her, she’s so kind and everything. Everybody love her, how can I not
TOMMY: Yea, It’s true. And you also know that she’s pregnant right?
CARLOS: She look espléndida
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carloswifee He’s madly in love with her, NOT crushes, just LOVE
yncarlossainzs The way his eyes look at them when they mention of Y/n is wholesome, he talk about her like a proud boyfriend
ferarrilovrs__ Thinking of when they’re really dating, ahh I can’t stop kicking my feet!!
carlossainzsidechick SOMEONE KISS HIM ON THE FOREHEAD RIGHT NOW!!!!!
[ to be continue ]
( taglist ) @janeholt3 @formulas-bitch @celestialams @aundercover
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geraskierfanficprompts · 3 months ago
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Prompt 135
Julian has a favorite tree in the woods near his home. Julian was barely old enough to walk when he first hugged his favorite tree in the greenwood. For years he visited, picnicked with, spoke to it, hugged it, and tended it. When he was around 8 years old, an older boy began bullying him for escaping court and lessons to spend time in the woods and sing. Julian sobbed into the embrace he gave his favorite tree. Julian has told his tree for years that he loves music, that he hates being a viscount. He hates it, he hates it, he hates it. When his bully follows him into the woods one day, Julian is afraid. His bully raises a fist to hit him, only for a branch from his favorite tree to fall and bonk the older child on the head. The child ran away crying, and Julian was just fine. The bully never picked on him again. Julian thanked his tree, before growing worried over the dropped branch. Healthy trees don't drop branches, surely- So he makes sure to tend to his favorite tree extra the next few months, make sure it's healthy. No more branches drop, it was just that one on that one day. Julian continues to grow, and Julian continues to rebel. He decides one day as a teenager that he's decided he's going to run away. He climbs his tree, and lounges in the suspiciously comfortable set of branches, and tells his tree the whole plan. He's going to become a bard, and change his name, and travel the continent. "I'll miss you. Terribly. Thank you for being with me all these years." Julian sobs as he hugs his tree. He sleeps in the arms of his tree that night, away from his supposed home. It was his last night in the area for years. Jaskier is on his way to perform for a court, and unfortunately, to get there he must cut through lettenhove. He's sure if he keeps his head down, doesn't play any music, and just rushes through, they'll never even notice he was there. But he can't NOT visit his tree. It's been years. So one night, he creeps into the woods near his father's manor. When he spots the tree, healthy and strong as always, he tears up. "It's me. Julian. I- I'm Jaskier now, but It's still me. I'm so happy to see you. I'm so sorry it's been so long-" He walks closer, going to hug his tree, when he hears a voice clear it's throat, and he spins around in surprise. Fuck. His father. "Julian. I knew you'd end up back here." "...I was just leaving." "No. No, you weren't." And guards reveal themselves, coming out of the woodwork. Jaskier swears there's even extra hired muscle there, as if Jaskier is something to fear. In a fight against men with weapons? No. In a fight via poetry and insults? Yes! Doesn't help here, though. "You are coming home, and you will fulfil your duty." "I don't care about my duty! Just as you've never cared about me!" "And why would I care about such a disrespectful mutt, Julian!?" The guards creep closer, just as his father clenches his fist, and Jaskier is trapped. If he tries to run, they'll catch him. If he climbs, they'll climb too. If he fights, he'll just be hurt as they drag him away. But then the guards freeze, their eyes widening in horror. One drops his weapon and runs. Jaskier is confused. Sure, he raised his lute like a weapon, but it shouldn't be that frightening. I mean the men here had blades! "Back away from him." A deep voice growls, startling Jaskier. Jaskier turns and sees that a man is walking out of his favorite tree. The man is hench, and in armor, and holding two giant swords, and he just came out of Jaskier's tree. Tree man THERE IS A TREE MAN! Jaskier is trying very hard to process this, when he hears his father snap to the guards to fight the man off and capture the viscount by any means necessary. A guard grabs Jaskier's arm hard enough to bruise, and suddenly the man no longer had a hand, as the Man From The Tree slices it cleanly off, and blocks Jaskier from their view with his own body.
After a few minutes of sword clangs and panic, the men all retreat. Jaskier's father spits out one last insult to him before running off with his men.
And then the gorgeous guardian turns back to him and hugs him, tight and warm.
"My tree?" "My Jaskier."
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