#i mean all of the women’s clothing there isn’t bad i usually get a thing or two from there too but like. it is no contest fr.

[lesbianlenas]

was in american eagle today & was looking in the men’s section like i always do bc i love their men’s section even though it is so expensive & my mom was like “you know you’re in the men’s section right” 1. as if i have not gotten clothes from the men’s section there many times 2. as if their men’s section is not vastly superior to the women’s section. i was like bc the men’s section here is great? and she was like ok you’re right. but like idk why she even brought it up like the men’s section is just so much better 😭

[gremlingottoosilly]

Someone, take Lego away from Konig (yandere!loser!Konig x fem!Reader)

AO3

Konig is keeping you in his basement. Turns out, this is still not the worst part. His interest are. Tags ans Warnings: Dub-con, obsessive behaviour, possessive behavior, yandere loser Konig, size difference, kidnapping, weird fluff.

König can play women’s bodies like fine musical instruments.

After he spent 10 minutes vigorously rubbing your outer labia, you concluded that he was thrown out of musical school on day one.

He flicks your clit occasionally, clearly not considering it something worthy of attention and, obviously, not something that actually brings you pleasure – he fidgets with it mechanically, like it’s a part of his riffle, and you almost want to say that his dismissive approach is kind of hot. He edges you perfectly, always giving away just enough pleasure that it feels nice, but not nearly enough that it brings you to orgasm – and he does so with zero idea of what he is doing, which makes you…almost proud. Of him. Of your angry crazy incel loser kidnapper who thought that bringing you lego flowers would make you suck his cock.

Well, it kinda did. Not the flowers, the whole…kidnapping thing. He did use it to get into your pants – and you aren’t even allowed to wear those now. Only his shirts, maybe a hoodie on a cold day, and a pair of lacy panties that he slips on you every morning he is at home.

You have a system – and König does his best to maintain it. You are getting fed at the same time, to make sure that your pretty little self is not malnourished, you are getting roughly clean clothes — most of it belongs to him, of course, like it’s not embarrassing to wear, and sometimes he even asks how your day was. Sometimes you look him deep in the eyes and say that you didn’t move from your usual spot the whole day because, well, you are kidnapped. Sometimes you are trying to be funny and make some silly jokes — and then he either gets too comfortable laughing and then trying to get his hand all the way down the depths of your inner thighs, or he gets angry.

König knows that a petty flower like you doesn’t want to be in captivity for so long, but there really isn’t much both of you can do about it.

He brings you different lego sets from time to time, trying to find out what you like the most. He doesn’t quite understand that, working in a Lego shop, you were utterly sick of most of the boxes lying around. He tried to gauge the reaction out of you, but you’re either ignoring him, crying or begging him to let you go…and he can’t exactly have that. He, kinda, can, of course, but it would mean sliding off your brain so you would never tell anyone about your experiences, or getting into a showdown with the police – and knowing that he hopped you through the border illegally to be his captive wife, wouldn’t really give him any brownie points. He is fucked, utterly and completely, if you’re ever going to be free without falling madly in love with him…

Which is why König is trying to make you love him. Thoroughly, utterly, and spending copious amounts of time with his tongue buried between your folds in the meantime.

Like now.

— You like it, ja? When I move like this…

He was spending too much time caressing and fondling your thighs – but you must admit that having his lips travel across your skin and sending goosebumps right into your core wasn’t so bad…he touched you a bit awkwardly, just a tad bit shy – like he wasn’t so sure how to approach a soft, female body instead of a cold rifle he was probably used to…he knows that he can’t just treat you like another one of his guns but, by god, if he doesn’t adore the way you look at him. All scared and nervous as he pushes his lips upwards, as he covers your soft skin with bite marks – you were so sure that he will be too nervous to even touch you, but you know better now…this guy doesn’t care that he is your captor. He only wants you to accept him, and if giving you gifts didn’t work out…

You needed to be a bit more diligent about the whole accepting his kindness thing. Maybe he would have been satisfied with a handjob – but now he wants to put his hands on you and do his job.

— Too…too much, Ko…

— Call me “sir”.

There is steel in his voice, and you stiff slightly. This is new – he was never like this before, even though you kinda got that he was in some sort of military. He was way too bulky and had too much money to be a regular gun nerd, so you settled for some special forces or elite war crime unit…then again, you weren’t in Germany anymore. Guy would have to get another citizenship to get into a more serious “I fucking hate my fellow man” forces.

He flicks his tongue over your clit and you remember what you’re here for. To get fucked. Because you are fucked. Not right now in physical sense, but you will be in a few minutes, and you’ve been mentally fucked for a few another hours and-

— Sir, ple…too much, re…really…

König fuckijng adores you.

He loves your trembling voice, your trembling hands, your trembling everything. The way you squint your eyes as he finds all of your special spots – it took him some time but ladies are just like riffles – come undone if you press on a few parts. You look perfect under him, and he couldn’t have you any other way even if he wanted to…god, you’re too fucking perfect for your own good. So, so pretty, it’s insane how he didn’t fuck you the first night you’ve been in his basement. Perhaps, he was trying to be a gentleman – fuck this, now. If he knew how sweet you would sound, he’d abandon any rotten chivalry on day one.

König didn’t have a lot of experience – a few sex workers here and there, some in the more exotic destinations while the others were, embarrassingly enough, from his hometown. It was a sense of domesticity, that he isn’t a fucking loser who can’t get a lady in his bed without wavering either his gun or hit wallet – but he has you now, and you don’t really care about his money or his guns…unless he counts your obvious activity. Which he doesn’t. Good golly, you’re too fucking pretty to count that.

He flicks his tongue over your clit and dips lower, deeper, sucking the sweet nectar straight from the source. You’re embarrassingly wet even as you try to push his head away – he would handcuff you, but he likes your little resistance attempts too much. He moans every time you tug on his hair and, with time, you should finally understand that everything you do only makes him want you more. Maybe, you do – but you keep doing this because you’re such a good girl who wants nothing more but to please her dearest…not exactly husband, but he can work on this. He has friends in places. Same ones who used to get him out of detentions when his quiet kid violent tendencies weren’t quite quiet enough.

He is moaning as he eats you out – the sound reverberates from your walls and makes you clench around his tongue, your brain already getting fried from pleasure. You never wanted to get off from your captor’s tongue buried so deep between your legs, but you surely enjoy it now…

You try to pry his head from you when he gets a bit too eager, when it feels like his nose is smashing your clit and you can only moan some mindless bullshit.

— You want to talk about lego instead?

He presses his head on your thighs, his cheek angled against the soft skin. He has a bit of a stubble that burns the soft skin, but the look in his eyes is far too eager. He is not bullshitting – and this is the most terrifying he is ever been. You try to imagine another three-hour lecture Star Wars and the history of lego sets combined with his awkward attempts to fuck you in between turning his affection spam from one thing to the other. The picture is vivid in your mind. You can almost hear it.

You consider your options. It is a hard decision for you.

— You know, they weren’t able to sell the sets to girls up until…

You grab a fistful of his hair and push his face all the way down your dripping pussy.

It looks like the only sure way of making your captor shut up is literally forcing him to fuck you…there were many such cases – you embarrassingly easily fall to his charms, even though he has the aura and charisma of a serial killer who got a freshly baked orphan for his lunch and then tried to talk you into destroying a small country’s economy.

König eats you out with the vigor of a starving man, and there isn’t a place he would love to be more than here and now, listening to your heavenly moans. This is the best motivational song he heard so far – and as he pushes his big, flat tongue deeper into the gummy walls of your clenching pussy, he thinks about recording your sounds and then listening to them in the gym. Could probably break the poor lifting pole with the strength of his fists.

He brought you to an orgasm – not easily, he had to lick the reaction out of you, your heat coming down to both of you like a wave. You feel tired immediately, knowing just how much energy you just wasted listening to his blabber between your legs – but you honestly can’t be arsed to react right now.

König lifts his body up so he can kiss you – you taste yourself on him and, admittedly, it’s a lovely way to make him shut up. You still tremble as you get down from your high, your legs finally giving up, even though you were already laying on that shabby mattress. You shift slightly so he won’t crush you under the weight of his body. A Lego piece pocks at your side, making you wince.

You hate this fucking place.

— What’s wrong, Liebling?

He nuzzles your neck like a needy dog, pressing light kisses all over your skin. He is marking it, too – you can’t keep comparing him to a dog, but this is exactly what he is. Simply a war hound that you have to tame in order to get a somewhat normal life while still belonging in his basement. You thought you knew how to play this game – then he pushed you on your tummy and fucked you because, apparently, you were too good at playing him. Even now, he acts more like a lover – if only you could see past his homicidal tendencies…

But you can’t.

But he doesn’t care anyway.

— I…

You bite your lips, trying to come up with a lie that wouldn’t make him fuck you. König thought you looked beautiful like this, all holed up in your thoughts. So, so pretty, he couldn’t help himself – he needed you, as much as he kinda hated playing the psychological game and trying to understand what you’re thinking. Ladies are too mysterious for him, after all.

— I want to sleep in a normal bed.

Oh.

Well, he…didn’t expect this.

He was ready to combat your desire to run away or to be let go willingly. He was ready to put you on your knees and make you beg for him to not let you go - after all, you did belong to him in all of his right. He didn’t…didn’t expect you to want something so simple. Something that he can do. God, you’d look fucking divine on his bed instead of the tiny basement he put you in. He can already imagine you on your tummy, face buried in his pillows as he pounds into your soft ass and explains every superhero poster he has in his room. He will show you all of his figures and knives and guns, and you’ll finally see just how amazing he is and how interesting his hobbies are – and you’re bound to finally love him the way he deserves.

You stare at him, blankly. He kinda loves when you look like that – sometimes he imagines you being a mindless little bimbo who can’t think of anything besides his dick, and it helps him get off when you’re too sleepy to play along with him. He tried to bring you more sets, something childish, something meant for girls – but you tossed away the rose bouquet and you didn’t even spare a second glance at some fandom set that he thought you’d like. God, you’re difficult. Women are difficult. Why can’t you be as straight as a riffle?

— Normal bed, Katzen? You don’t like it here?

He puts a hand on your shoulder, his fingers too big to rest on your body carefully – he easily reaches for your neck and he knows that you’d go out like a light with the smallest squeeze. You’re adorable and soft like this, and he can’t wait to finally try choking with you.

König imagines your pretty, soft body all helpless under him – maybe you’d claw at his hands and beg him to stop, maybe you’d enjoy it, drenching the small mattress with your juices. Maybe you’d push your hips towards his, desperately searching for release. You can be a nasty, dirty girl, he knows this all too well – mostly because he did go through your phone and searched for your browser history. Who knew that a simple lego store cashier could have so many kidnapping and overpowering fantasies. Who knew that you could be so wet just because some military-obsessed loser wanted to shove his cock into you and wasn’t nice enough to ask first.

— I…I don’t like the basement.

Smart girl. You know how to be sot and obedient when you have to. Too bad, this behavior also made you all the more desirable for König – compared to the rowdy recruits and dumb enemies, your quiet voice is everything he needs to not go crazy. His hand plays with your neck, squeezing it slightly, playfully. He can feel your pulse quickening every time he does this and he is sure that if he’d drop his hand between your legs again, your pulsating pussy would be wet enough to indicate a second orgasm.

Shit.

He goes too far again.

— You don’t like the basement? Why?

You stare at him, blankly. He seriously thought there is nothing wrong with the basement – it’s small, yes, but probably just about the size of a studio apartment you were able to afford while working in Berlin, of all places. You have a mattress, a loving boyfriend, you have all the food and snacks you want, your pussy is filled with cum and your mind should be filled with endless love and adoration for the coolest guy in the world who just so happens to be in love with you, so…

He looks at your face again. Ja, you don’t like the basement. You’re a surface girl after all.

— You really want me to answer that? It’s the basement.

He snorts, still dragging the conversation.

— I spend most of my childhood in the basement. It was nice.

— I could tell.

— What?

— Nothing. Let me out, please.

He sighs with deeply settled tiredness. He thought you’d be nicer about it, too – but he knows what ladies want, he is a ladies' man at heart. He doesn’t have one, of course, not unless this charcoal-black shrapnel-filled thing deep in his chest could be considered one, but he tried his best to be good for you. You deserve something nice, something good. He wants to kiss you all over and he will do it on his own bed, while trying to talk you into watching some old nerdy TV show with him. Maybe you’d agree to play with some Lego after this and it could be considered a really nice and thorough foreplay.

— I can’t.

— Let me sleep on a normal bed, then.

Well, this, he can do.

Carefully unlocking your shackles and immediately catching your legs so you won’t kick him in an attempt to escape, König picks you up like a kitten. It’s scary, almost, how easy it is for him to just manhandle you into the position he wants. He is a big boy, admittingly, so it really doesn’t matter how big or how small you are. He can abuse you easily, and this is why you’re trying to keep him gentle. Using all of your womanly charms even if this guy would get off just from you calling his name.

He covers your eyes so you won’t see anything – not like you’re interested in the amount of weirdly specific movie posters on the walls or an alarming amount of firearms. He knows he is not the most charming person out there with the most interesting hobbies, but you will learn to appreciate all of his anime figures, or else you’re going to suffer the fate of a recruit who dares to ask his late thirties colonel of who the fuck Ayanami Rei is. Rumors are held that this guy was never seen in the army again.

He only puts the hand away from your face when you are sitting on the soft bed. You stare at the navy sheets – fucking obviously – and, surprisingly, a bed frame. Then your gaze travels a bit further, to the walls and…

God.

Oh fuck.

You almost want to cry from how much of a loser your kidnapper is. He is a threatening mercenary, a fucking colonel in military uniform who holds you at gunpoint occasionally. You stare at the anime posters. You contemplate your options.

— Can I go back to the basement?

If god is real, he is a fucking anime girl from the poster in your kidnapper’s bedroom.

[leossmoonn]

can you please do a fluff piece where Mike realizes he’s falling in love with the reader? maybe he’s scared at first and doesn’t know how to express himself to the reader (established relationship)? I feel like “labyrinth” by Taylor Swift would best describe what I have in mind! thanks for writing, love your work :)

thank you so much! this was so fun to write. i hope i was able to capture your idea!

————

the first thing mike notices about you is how gentle you are. you aren’t always kind, and you get heated quickly. sometimes you say things you don’t mean or your exhaustion catches up with you, but the way you care and love is gentle.

he sees it in the way you cook dinner for him and abby and bring it all the way from your apartment. he hears it in the way you compliment and gush over him every day. he hears it when you assure him that he’s not a burden and his worries are valid. you show it in the way you massage his shoulders after a hard day of work. you show it in the way you kiss him awake in the mornings you stay over.

mike’s never been in a relationship like this. he can’t confidently say he’s ever been in a relationship period. women aren’t exactly lined up at his door. but when he met you, something just felt different. it truly felt like his whole world flipped upside down.

he’s never had an abundance of affection in his life. not since his brother disappeared. it was almost uncomfortable for him at first. accepting your quick pecks, long hugs, and sweet words was hard for him. he grew to appreciate everything you said and did for him, though. he realized that this is what he’s been missing in his life. your affection is what he’s been craving ever since he was a child.

but knows he can’t give you it back. or more so, he doesn’t know how to. he has all these feelings for you: joy, excitement, intimacy, passion, gratitude, and trust. yet, he doesn’t know how to display them. every word he says comes out in a rush and mumbles. he stutters as he tries to compliment you, his tongue suddenly feeling numb. he’s even afraid to instigate anything having to do with holding you, afraid he’ll somehow break you because you’re so perfect and he’s tainted.

the day he realizes he’s falling in love with you is on a sunday morning. the rain is pouring so hard it wakes mike up. he reaches out to you, only to grip empty sheets. he gets up, putting a pair of sweats on and sees you and abby in the kitchen. you’re coloring with her while sipping some coffee. there are a stack of waffles by you with a glass of orange juice for abby. mike can’t help but smile. if he had a camera, he would take a picture and frame this moment.

“good morning, sleepy head.” you greet him. you get up from your seat, walking over to him and hugging him. “how’d you sleep?”

“good,” he says. he instantly relaxes as you touch him. he leans into your warmth. “did you?”

“i always do when i sleep with you,” you smile. he blushes and smiles bashfully. “i’m glad.”

“i made some breakfast if you’d like some. i made it more for you and i, but abby ate some as well.”

he loves the way you take care of abby like she’s your own. you two got along from the start, which really eased mike’s mind. abby’s a tough cookie to crack, but it doesn’t seem like she’s invincible when it comes to you.

you kiss him on the lips. this kiss is soft and fleeting, but you press into him to make sure he knows it means something. he loves how different your kisses can be.

in front of abby, you kiss him chastely. there’s no need to stick your tongue in his mouth while his baby sister is there. but behind closed doors, you kiss him like you’ve been waiting to for eternity. it’s relieving because that’s how he kisses you, too. those types of kisses are often messy and wet. they usually lead to clothes being strung across the room and grabby hands. when mike’s had a bad day or isn’t feeling well, you kiss him on the forehead. whenever you stay over, you never fail to kiss his cheek before falling asleep in his arms.

“thank you,” mike says. “it smells delicious.”

you two sit down at the table, watching abby color. “is that me?” you ask. “yep,” abby nods. “and is that mike?” you point to a male stick figure.

“no, that’s one of my friends from school. this is mike.” she points to a stick figure with horns on it. you can’t help but laugh.

and god, he loves your laugh. although abby basically called mike the devil, he can’t help but smile. this laugh is your true laugh. it’s loud and drawn out, usually ending with a big sigh. you claim to hate it because you tell him you sound like a clown nose, but he enjoys it.

after eating, you convince abby to shower. now it’s just you and mike. you both get ready for the day, mike getting ready at the speed of light. you’re still picking out your outfit, even though you’re not even sure you will go anywhere important today.

mike just sits and admires you, telling you that everything you put on looks good on you. he knows you hate that answer, but he truly believes it. he loves the way you roll your eyes and start to get whiny after he says that. he loves the way you try so hard to look good, even though you could literally be wearing a trash bag and he’d still find you beautiful. as you scurry through the bedroom, he can’t help but catch onto your perfume and body wash. he loves the way you smell. so clean and fresh, even if you’re sweaty and hot.

“we should go out somewhere,” you suggest. “it’s pouring rain outside,” he chuckles softly.

“we could go grab lunch or dinner. you can wear that new shirt vanessa got you for your birthday.”

“i’m not so sure i like it.”

“oh, stop,” you shake your head. “you look so handsome in that shirt. and plus, it’s like the only nice shirt you have — no offense. you should wear it out. i know i won’t be the only woman staring at you.”

mike’s ears feel hot and a big smile encompasses his face. he loves how confident you are in him. everybody he knows he’s not the worst looking guy, but he doesn’t think he’s someone you stop and stare at because you can’t believe your eyes. he hates his eye bags and his soulless resting face, as abby calls it. he knows he looks angry a lot, mostly because he kind of is. you don’t seem to mind, though, or even notice.

you always want to go out and show him off, telling him how handsome and cute he is. he can’t deny that it makes him feel good. he loves that. he loves everything you do for him. there’s no denying it. he just loves you.

mike twiddles with his fingers and looks down at his lap. the words just repeat in his head.

i’m in love with her. i’m in love with her. i’m in love with her.

he feels his throat constrict and his heart race. everything nasty he’s ever thought about himself rises to the surface. he can’t be in love with you. he doesn’t know what it’s like to love somebody that isn’t a family member, and even then, the way he shows his love to abby is unconventional. all mike knows is how to push people away and pick fights and be alone.

“babe, are you okay?” you ask, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“hm? yeah,” he says, glancing at you.

“you sure? you looked like you were spacing out a little bit.”

“yeah,” he repeats. “i think abby’s done in the shower. i’m going to take one.”

“okay, sure,” you nod. “are you sure you don’t want to go anywhere?”

“um, ask abby. i don’t care,” he mumbles. he hastily grabs clean clothes and walks to the bathroom with his head down. you sigh loudly, racking your brain with what mike could be so upset about. maybe he had a bad dream and he just remembered, or something happened at work and he’s thinking about it?

either way, you feel as though it’s good to let him relax in the shower before pestering him about it. mike has a hard time coming to you with his problems. and not that you need to know every one or fix everything, but you just want him to be able to air it out so he can at least feel better.

most of the day is just you guys relaxing in the house. abby asks if she can go over to a friend’s house because her house is just so boring. you and mike take her and after you drop her off, you both run to the grocery store to pick up things for dinner.

“we should’ve gotten some dessert,” you say as you take the last bite on your plate.

“we can go back now,” mike says. “ah, it’s okay. maybe next time,” you smile.

he nods and picks up your plates, starting to wash them. you turn to face him, looking over him. you can tell his muscles are tense under his shirt. his jaw is clenched, which means he’s thinking about something that’s making him nervous. you can’t stand seeing him look sad anymore.

“hey, baby,” you say softly. you place a hand between his shoulder blades, gently rubbing his back. “you don’t have to do the dishes. we don’t have to be that productive.”

“i know. we aren’t doing much anyways. thought i’d do them before they pile up.”

you smile and peck his cheek. “you’re the perfect man, michael schmidt.”

he sighs and shakes his head. “i’m not.”

“of course you are. why would you think that?”

“because i…” his words falter and now you start to get nervous.

“mike, it’s okay. you can talk to me.”

“it’s stupid and… and just doesn’t make me the kind of guy you think i am.”

you sigh, your breath sounding shaky. “the only way you could not be is… is you killed someone or cheated on me.”

his eyes widen and he shakes his head. “oh my god. no. i haven’t killed anybody, and i would never cheat on you. you don’t understand how lucky i am to have you. and that i… i couldn’t ever think about cheating on you. no matter what state of mind i am in or if you hurt me first. you… you just… you’re everything to me.”

your heart swells and take his hand into yours, forgetting it’s wet from doing the dishes. you both share a small laugh and he dries his hands quickly.

“you’re everything to me, too, mike. and i want you to know that you can talk to me about whatever. i’m not trying to be a fixer, but i want you to know that i can be that person you vent to. i want to be that person. i want to carry your baggage. i want to share your scars. so, you don’t have to tell me what’s been on your mind now, or ever, but just for the future, know that i am here for you.”

he didn’t think he could fall any deeper for you until now.

“i know. i’m afraid i won’t be able to be there for you, though.”

“oh,” you say. “well, that’s okay. we all have times in our lives where —”

“i… i don’t mean emotionally. i mean, i do, but … it’s not easy for me to do what you do.”

you raise a brow. “and what do i do?”

“the way you…” he sighs, feeling so stupid. why can’t he just grow up? he’s not a teenager anymore learning about emotional intelligence.

“mike, go ahead,” you say.

“i… i’m falling in love with you,” he rushes out to where it sounds like i’mfallinginlovewithyou. you can’t help but let your jaw drop. “and i’m afraid that i won’t be able to show it like how you do. you’re so good at it. you’re so good at showing how much you care for me. i’m not the same. i want to be, but i don’t know how to. I’m afraid that you’ll realize that and… and leave me. which i would understand. it’s hard to give and not receive.”

you’re silent for a moment. mike searches your face, feeling like he can’t breathe. your face breaks out in a smile.

little does mike know, he does know how to show he loves and cares for you. you can see it when he reaches for you in his sleep, his hand searching for you even when he’s unconscious. he pulls you in, placing his hand on the small of your back without fail every time. you see it in the way he listens intently to your problems, never trying to provide a solution, only listening because he knows that’s what you need. he shows his love for you by holding your hand or waist in public, always keeping close to you and looking out for anybody threatening.

mike may think all these things he does are small, but you think it equates to what you do, if not more. he may not show it outwardly like you do, but it doesn’t make it any less important or more able.

“mike.” you move closer to him, brining a hand to cup his cheek. “you have no idea how you show your love to me. it doesn’t need to be over the top. the way i show my love for you isn’t over the top. i just think you’re not used to have someone love you, so you think everything i do is special.”

“it is, though,” he insists. “well, i think what you do is special, mike. you don’t need to ever be afraid of me not thinking you don’t love me. cause i know,” you say.

he breathes out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “good. i’m glad.”

“why don’t we go and get some dessert,” you suggest. he nods, “anything you want.” he moves to grab his shoes and coat.

“and mike,” you say, stopping him. he looks up at you, his big brown eyes staring into yours. “in case you couldn’t tell, i’m in love with you, too.”

[definitelynotafurinasimp]

Being in a relationship with the Fontaine Women

characters: Charlotte / Furina / Lynette / Navia x gn!reader (separate)

warnings: none, just fluff

genre: Mostly fluff, with a bit of comfort added in Navia’s part

a/n: I decided to leave out Clorinde bc I honestly don’t have any concrete headcanons about her, mostly because she was only there for like 3 scenes and said a total of like 2 sentences. I will write for her, but I still need time to read more about her.

I tried to keep this at least a bit headcanon-y, but you know me, so I decided to add a small scenario to every character’s part, mostly just one’s I felt served as good examples of how things might be and that I didn’t feel like I’d get the chance to write in the future.

Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Charlotte

With Charlotte, days on which nothing happened were rare. There always was some sort of event going on somewhere, and wherever it was, the journalist wasn’t far away, dragging you along with her. But just because you were there for work, didn’t mean you couldn’t enjoy yourselves, especially with someone as energetic as her.

Trying to hold secrets from her, be they good or bad, quickly proved to be futile. She was a Journalist after all, so slowly digging up information to eventually figure out the truth was part of her being. That being said, getting informations through investigating always felt more rewarding to her than getting them served on a silver platter, so it quickly became routine between the two of you to give each other only a few hints instead of normally announcing news… something that, to the misfortune of others around you, quickly also seeped into your conversation with your friends and family.

“‘Man trips and falls down stairs at the opera house’? No, why would anyone read an article when they get all of the information via the headline?”, you suggested before quickly discarding your idea, causing Charlotte to sink further into her thoughts.

“Ooh, how about ��Tragic accident at the opera house leaves man injured’?”, just as quickly as the words left her mouth, the two of you gave each other an energetic high-five before Charlotte continued to map the article out loud, only for a weird feeling to slowly wash over you… as if there was something important you were forgetting.

“Isn’t today the premier of that thriller you wanted to write an article about?”, you asked, only for Charlotte to stop talking in the middle of her sentence, her eyes widening as she quickly glanced towards the clock.

“You’re right! These clothes should be good enough for the opera house right? Ah, who am I kidding? Nobody cares!”, words began shooting out of her mouth in a panic as she grabbed you by the wrist and started dragging you towards the Aquabus, pen and notebook in her other hand.

…Somehow, be it by the grace of your Archon or Charlotte’s insistence the Aquabus drove at twice its intended speed, the two of you managed to get there in time.

Furina

The Hydro Archon had an… interesting way of showing her affection. The performance she liked everyone thinking was the real her too fond of the dramatic to do so in a normal way while the real her was too easily flustered to go through with anything fancy. And so, it inevitably became your responsibility to initiate anything even slightly romantic.

Just because she was nervous however, didn’t mean Furina’d drop her usual act and with the way she behaved and talked whenever others were looking could easily fool people into thinking your dynamic was the other way around.

There weren’t many moments in which the two of you had the chance to be alone in public, with the Archon either surrounded by a few of the gardes or swarmed by the citizens of Fontaine. So when you wanted to visit your home in the countryside, Furina was quick to decide that she’d indulge you with her presence, choosing to keep silent about how she was happy to leave the city behind for a day.

If Furina’s uncharacteristic silence wasn’t enough to make you feel like there was something wrong, the look on her face would have made any doubts in your mind dissolve. Just as you had opened your mouth to say something however, you were interrupted by the feeling of something grabbing your hand, all the while the Archon's face was slowly painted red.

“Are you feeling fine Furina? Your face is-”, you were quick to tease, unable to hide your amusement as it was all written over your face. Furina however, did not look up, quickly cutting trying to cut you off, only for her own feelings to be betrayed by a crack in her voice.

“The sUN- I- Thanks for your concern, my dear companion, but there’s no need to worry. I’m fine, just a bit warm, the sun is scorching hot today after all”, she quickly stuttered out before putting on her act once again, hiding her face by looking away from you, only to quickly find herself engulfed in shadow as you put a parasol over her, greeting her with a smile when she finally looked back at you.

As the way to your destination was once again filled with silence, your eyes eventually landed on a hill covered in rainbow roses, causing you to quickly drag Furina from your actual path.

“Where are you going!?”, she managed to ask, only shy away for a moment when you suddenly shoved one of the roses in front of her face.

“Be careful when taking it, it’s really easy to prick oneself's on their thorns”, you spoke with a genuine smile, only for it to quickly contort into a teasing one when you saw her blush even further.

“I should have brought a better parasol, this one doesn’t seem to be working”, you joked, causing Furina to fire back with some sort of excuse. You didn’t care too much, the sight of her scrambling to regain her composure was too cute for you to do anything but silently observe it.

The rest of your journey was rather uneventful, as was your way back. What was of interest for many citizens of Fontaine however, was the rainbow rose their archon wore for the rest of the week 

Lynette

To call Lynette a romantic would have been enough to net yourself a serious defamation case. She wasn’t her brother, who did and said all kinds of embarrassing stuff while putting on a mask, so while the two of you may have been in a relationship, most normal people wouldn’t be able to tell. So while you shouldn’t expect to see her showing her love to you in broad daylight, that didn’t mean that you didn’t get any special treatment.

On days where there was nothing to do, it had gotten somewhat common for Lynette to come over to your place, using it as a place to recharge her batteries when there was too much going on at home. So as you silently sat on your couch, reading a novel you had recently bought, while Lynette laid next to you, with her head placed on your lap, eyes closed as she relished in the calm atmosphere, the sound of the door suddenly swinging open was enough to give you a small heart attack.

“Pardon the intrusion, but have you seen my dear siste-”, Lyney’s voice rang through the room before his gaze eventually landed on the two of you, eyes instantly widening. “Oh sorry, I didn’t know I was interrupting something.”

Just as quickly as he had appeared, he was gone, and while you liked to think that it normally took quite a bit to get you to blush, you could feel your cheeks quickly heat up. Was it because of his tone, his smirk or some weird combination of both, you didn’t understand, all you knew being that Lynette’s brother always found a way to make you feel embarrassed about even the most boring scenes.

“Should we-”, you quickly looked down at Lynette and began to talk, only for her to quickly finish your sentence for you.

“‘Try catching up to him’? I don’t think that’s necessary”, she stated matter of factly, her eyes not opening for even a split second before continuing to hum to herself.

“It seemed like he was looking for you, maybe he was just worried where you were?”, you asked, quickly getting a response in the form of a shake of her head.

“I told him I was visiting you. If I had to take a guess I’d say he was just passing your home and decided to quickly mess with you.” Her explanation made more sense than you’d like to admit, it wouldn’t have been the first time he decided to do things simply to try and get some amusement out of your reactions. However, you didn’t like the way Lynette made it sound like getting a reaction out of you was something that required so little effort.

“Sure it wasn’t you he was trying to mess with?”, you asked teasingly, only for her to finally open her eyes as a small smile found its way onto her lips.

“More than certain, redcheeks.”

Navia

Navia had always been easy to get along with. She was intelligent, funny and could single handedly lighten up the mood in any room, possessing an amount of self-esteem that was charming without coming across as her being full of herself. To use her own words: Who wouldn’t treasure having a partner like her. And while there were times her work as leader of Spina di Rosula kept her too occupied to see you much, she made sure to use her time with you to the fullest.

Was it eating at the Hotel together once in a while, or going on a walk around Poisson and Fontaine, taking in what remained of its colorful landscape while simply chatting the day away. Whether the subject of your conversation held any importance or you simply joked around, didn’t matter. Having each other by your side was enough to make any day a good one in retrospect.

There was a time you used to fear visits to the cemetery with Navia. It wasn’t like you didn’t want her to be sad whenever you visited, it was her fathers grave after all, but seeing her knees grow weak as she tried her hardest to keep a brave look on her face made your heart sting as if it had been pierced with a knife. It had been that way each and every time, no matter if it had been a week after his death or two years… But not this time.

As the two of you arrived at the grave, you glanced over at Navia, fully preparing yourself for what you might witness once again, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. Instead, you found her silently smiling to herself and as you followed her gaze, your eyes eventually landed on a pair of candles placed next to the grave, causing your lips to form into a smile as well.

“Looks like Silver and Melus were here before us”, you noted, only for her to shake her head in response.

“Melus told me he wouldn’t be able to visit the grave until later… And well, you know Silver. I doubt he’s the kind of guy to light candles.”

Callas the Unfaithful no more. You might not have known her father that much, only seeing him a couple of times, but you had no doubt that the one who raised Navia would never have murdered anyone for any reason. 

Before you had the chance to lose yourself in your thoughts even more however, you were brought back to the real world by Navia’s voice.

“You still have the flowers?”, she asked, only for you to carefully grab them from your bag and present them to her, handing her one before putting the other in front of the grave. “Thanks. I’m sorry, but could you leave me alone with him for a moment? I’d like to tell him the good news”, she asked only for you to quickly nod.

“Thank you, you’ve been a great help today. I love you”, she told you with a smile.It wasn’t like her usual, radiant ones, instead being much smaller, but it was genuine, and that was the only thing that mattered.

[witchthewriter]

𝐃𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

⤷ gender neutral, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!    

a/n: I made a quiz ‘Which Son Is Your Old Man’, so you can find out once and for all who you would be best suited to!

Warnings: swears, mentions of violence, smoking, drugs

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ      

𝐉𝐚𝐱 𝐓𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫

・Yes, he does spend a lot of time doing club business. But it also means he’s home randomly throughout the day. 

・His speciality is making breakfast; eggs, bacon, toast, french toast, waffles etc 

・Yes, he did develop the skill from all the one night stands he’s had...

・But hey, at least now you’re the one that reaps the reward!

・Doesn’t snore in his sleep, but does toss and turn a lot 

・Sometimes he has really really bad nightmares. He doesn’t want to wake you up, so he goes and has a smoke outside

・Really loves chewing on ice cubes. When you get McDonalds, he’ll eat everyone’s ice from their drinks (obviously after their done with it)

・When you’re feeling down; physically or mentally, he’ll read to you. Jax bought you a new edition of your favourite book for your birthday and he’s so used to holding it in his hands by now. 

・Really likes when you light candles when he gets home, he prefers them over the overhead lighting 

・Doesn’t like loud sudden noises - definitely has undiagnosed PTSD. He’s gotten really good at hiding it, but some days - when he has really long showers, you know it’s a bad day 

𝐎𝐩𝐢𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐧

・When he isn’t doing things for the club, he loves to work in ‘the shed’. 

・He has a lot of projects going on - making garden beds for Gemma’s events, 

・Opie usually ends up trekking dust, shredded timber and so on throughout the house. You make him have a shower as soon as he’s finished working outside. 

・But you can’t lie, he does create some beautiful things. 

・He made a dining room table - and the detailing was so amazing you nearly teared up

・Opie is great at painting as well, honestly, he’s just good at general renovations. Somehow he knows how to do stuff around the house - unclogging drains, fixing pipes, changing lightbulbs, stopping leaks etc

・Opie’s like your own handy man! 

・Secretly a cat person. Don’t get him wrong, he doesn’t mind dogs. They’re great, but cats are so unpredictable - without the risk. He finds them so interesting. 

・Loves Disney movies, especially the cartoon version of Robin Hood. You’ll find him humming the song about Robin and Little John 

・Likes that he towers of you and will put things out of your reach just to rile you up

𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐛𝐬 𝐓𝐞𝐥𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐝

・Actively cleans up after himself and you. 

・Really likes a clean home, and he’s lived on his own for a long time, so he knows how to run a house

・He also grew up around a lot of women, so he knows how to cook some great meals 

・Chibs was also whipped into shape by these women, so that’s why it’s ingrained in him...

・Knows a lot of Scottish drinking songs, and he always sings them when he’s had a few too much to drink

・And his voice is actually quite lovely 

・He also sings in the shower 

・A loud gruff Scottish man singing in your shower always brightens your day 

・Automatically turns the kettle on when he gets home (and will make tea for two, knowing exactly how you like it)

・Not a lot of random visitors, he likes to keep business and his home life separate. Even though the club is his life, he likes having his own space 

𝐇𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐋𝐨𝐰𝐦𝐚𝐧

・Many, many takeout and movie nights

・Especially when he’s been gone on club business

・Does the washing and folding for both your clothes. It was his main job when he lived at home too. 

・Also mows the lawn without a shirt on, so that’s...a fun sight to see (he likes showing off in front of you)

・Loves the movie Avatar; would definitely go into a deep dive of how it all works and how they created it. 

・Would die if you showed interest in it as well. You bought him a book about the characters and he spent a whole afternoon reading it

・Surprises everyone with how much he loves books 

・A man of few words, he actually has really profound things to say. Some of it can be really poetic...

・Likes having his shoulders rubbed, and in return, he massages your feet 

・Is really good at looking after you when you’re sick. He has a lot of homemade recipes; soups, oldwives tricks etc. (Except the term ‘oldwives tricks’ shouldn’t be overlooked. A lot of their 

𝐓𝐢𝐠 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐫

・Rescue dogs galore 

・Tig hates seeing any animal hurt, but he has a special place in his heart for dogs

・Big fucking snorer, and is out as soon as his head hits the pillow

・Hates cooking but doesn’t mind doing the dishes - yeah he’s fucked up that way

・So you handle the food; he’ll get the groceries, but for the love of god he cannot make a proper grown up dish

・In return, he doesn’t mind doing the vaccuuming and mopping (he would so dress up in a maid’s outfit and do it)

・Whenever he wakes up in the middle of the night, he goes into the loungeroom to watch cartoons - like popeye

・Cried while watching Titanic btw

・Oh and has a stash of different types of drugs. Nothing too hardcore though. 

・He also makes you have an unregistered firearm so you can protect yourself 

・Also loves comic books. He’s a DC kinda guy...yes, his favourite character is Joker

[macsmoods]

Hey love, can I request a hobie brown x fem! mma fighter reader who’s also a spider person or symbiotic (meaning they have a venom or something like him). Maybe Miguel sent hobie to go retrieve a new recruit and he finds her at a fighting expo absolutely kicking to crap out of her opponent.

feel free to ignore tho

THE PUNISHER

Hobie Brown

Summary: Miguel is tired of Hobie complaining about have no competition at HQ, so he sends him to find the new recruit. Miguel knows you’ll be his match. You are low on cash even though your the spider women of Earth-233. You decide to take it up in the ring to make some extra money.

warning⚠️ swearing, hitting

not edited ———————————————————————

Hobie entered Miguel’s office ready to get yelled at again. It was the third time this week he’d been called in for his “bad” behavior as Miguel put it.

“You know if you want to talk to me this bad all the time might as well just ask for my number.” Hobie yelled up to Miguel. Miguel scoffed as he lowered his desk. He turned already glaring at Hobie.

“Ah yes i just love the bullshit that comes out of your mouth so much that i have to hear it every hour.” miguel retorted as he walked towards Hobie.

Hobie rolled his eyes before beginning again. “What did u do this time, boss.” Miguel turned towards his desk going to sit again. He motioned for Hobie to join him.

Reluctantly Hobie stepped forward looking at the screen. “That’s your next mission. She’s our new recruit. Y/n. The spider women of Earth-233.”

“Isn’t that your job?” Hobie asked.

“Usually but you’ve been asking for some competition. She’s it.” Hobie scoffed walking off the platform.

“Yeah will see.” Hobie said disappearing through the door.

Back on Earth-233…

You grunted throwing another punch at your opponent hitting him square in the jaw. Quickly you threw another earning yourself the victory as he fell to the floor.

You smiled as the announcer pulled your arm into the air. You smiled into the crowd wiping the blood from your lips.

Walking out of the ring you went back into the locker room. Grabbing your belongings you checked the time to see it was two in the morning. You would be able to get at least 6 hours of sleep.

Instead of walking you decided to swing yourself to you apartment using the back roads. Making it there you quickly put on pajamas and fell asleep.

Waking up you did the normal spider women things such as stopping someone from robbing a store and so on. It was finally time for another fight. You had been preparing for this for months. You were going against the reigning champion and odds were definitely against you.

Meanwhile Hobie has just arrived at the ring ready to enjoy a fight.

“Today we have a good match up folks. The reigning champion, the crusher! His opponent today is the undefeated castigadora!” he yelled. “Please shake hands and wait for the fight to begin.

Hobie watched as y/n and the so called crusher shook hands and got into position. He watched as the 6ft giant towered over your 5’5 body.

“DING!” The fight was on.

Crusher threw a punch but it was to slow. You swiftly moved out of the way punching him twice in the abdomen.

He didn’t fault quickly countering with a punch to your jaw. Now you were mad.

“you fucking bitch.” you scoffed under your breath. Before he could even react you took two swift punches to his jaw and one to his stomach making him double over.

You kept punching until the finally bell rang. Steadying yourself you felt your hand pushed into the air.

“The castigadora stays undefeated!” the announcer shouted. You smiled looking through crowd before your eyes laid on him.

Making your way out of the ring you headed to the locker room.

“Did miguel send you?” you questioned as he entered the room. You struggled trying to clean up your lip.

Hobie walked over grabbing the cloth from your hand dampening it before dabbing your lips. “Your quite a fighter darling. I expected you to get the shit beat out of you.”

You scoffed at that. “I’m more skilled then i seem. Who even are you?” You questioned.

“Hobie Brown. Miguel sent me to recruit you which i’m guessing you know about already.” You simply nodded.

“I think that’s it.” Hobie stated dabbing the last bit of blood.

“Thank you.” you said with a small blush.

“Ok now let’s begin are journey to HQ.” he said.

“I’m sorry but there must be a misunderstanding. I’m not going to HQ with you.” you answered.

“Why’s that darling?” Hobie said tilting his head. You blushed as you made eye contact. He was undeniably handsome.

“I want Miguel to take me. Just to make sure that this safe.” you said.

“Oh so you don’t trust me?” he questioned with a slight chuckle. Every step he took towards you to you took one back. Soon enough your back hit the sink.

He leaned close to your ear before beginning again, “Please love, come with me.” He wrapped his arm around your waist.

You protested as he flipped open his watch. You tried to break from his grip but it was relentless. You watched as he smiled at you before stepping into the portal. ———————————————————————translations castigadora-punisher ——————————————————————— Authors note

This is so trashy😭 I’m sorry this was my first request attempt so hopefully it gets better in the future. Woke up this morning and my one shots had blown up. Im so surprised cause i thought the writing was so crapppy. Anyways tysm for the love. Enjoy this Hobie fic. I think i’m gonna try an obx one shot next…

REQUESTS: OPEN

Sincerely,

macsmoods🌊🫧

[comfortless]

König is usually depicted as an only child in most peoples headcanons, but how different do you think he would be if he had older/younger siblings?

actually i think it would be really fun to explore König being a middle child. ^^ there are so many possibilities, this is like finding a really big stick outside to poke at poor König with…

tw for emotional/physical abuse, bullying, toxic masculinity nonsense, mental health stuff.

i think that everyone heralds König’s father as being the worst of the worst, but what if that awful behavior was reserved solely for König? maybe he had an older sister that his parents see as being their golden child. she doesn’t get bullied: she’s pretty, average height, her grades don’t suffer from something undiagnosed holding her back. the yelling and fighting in the house is never targeted at her.

König knows his older sister is the favorite, there’s never been any doubt about that. even as children she was granted anything that she could ask for, had their mother doting on her constantly, his father praising her for academic achievements and for simply existing. the love is definitely there, no questions asked. their parents always wanted a daughter and here she is: more capable and wonderful than they could have even hoped for.

and seeing how they may have treated König: the girl follows suit in making her younger brother’s life a bit hellish. she was never violent with him, not like their father, nor was she cold like their mother, but she would chide König endlessly about how he needed to focus on his studies, even when he couldn’t possibly do so.

the protestations would fall entirely on deaf ears here. his sister means well, in a way, but she also serves as a constant reminder of just how wonderful König’s life could have been if he were only more normal. (which, isn’t the case at all in this horrible, dysfunctional family. König just happened to be an “oops”, and his mother’s post-partum depression may have been so bad she never properly bonded with him when it was most important to do so.) i imagine that he loves her, Oma taught him to be good to women no matter how many squabbles that they get into, but there’s definitely a layer of resentment there.

say… he has a younger brother, too. always treated as some fragile, beloved thing. he’s taken out to buy new clothes and snacks when König’s jeans are full of holes and he’s left to his own devices to find food. that’s fair, in König’s eyes. he dotes on his little brother just as much as the rest of them, because their difference in age is smaller than with the older sister, he’s only a grade or two below him. his younger sibling is the closest thing that he has to a sincere friend.

the kids at school bully him in turn simply for being associated with König. pointing out that one day, he’ll probably hit some bizarre growth spurt and behave like an animal trapped in a cage, just as his older sibling did. unlike their sister, König’s not so hellbent on keeping up appearances at school that he would shy away from throwing some poor bastard into the mud to defend his brother. or his father.

though the old man is certainly kinder to his youngest child, he still thinks of him as being too soft. he won’t toss a fist his way, but the arguments in that house seem to triple when he realizes his boy isn’t as tough and strong as he should be. their father is constantly bickering with his mother over babying their youngest too much, and as awful as it is, hearing all of this is probably the first time König’s actually felt any pride in himself. the old man compares these two and almost seems elated that König’s becoming a proper man, one that doesn’t come crying to his mother like his brother does so often.

and despite all of this, König would have a lot of good memories with them. their sister has her own friends, but never held back on spending time with her (weird) brothers. maybe they built a little fort in the forest beyond their house to share stories and hoard snacks or trinkets. König had to set it up, of course, but it gives him a chance to play some sort of mentor to the both of them, showing off how easily he can structure something and share his knowledge about anything under the sun on hazy summer days when they’re picnicking outside to get away from their parents.

i don’t believe König would turn out too differently, honestly! maybe he would be more social, actually having two other people he could talk to if he chose it. in fact, after their Oma’s passing, maybe his siblings and his mother are the only parts of his family he bothers to keep in contact with at all. unfortunately bullying would take a toll on him regardless of if he had one sibling or twelve. he might trust (some of) the people that he shares blood with, but ultimately the world is still something unfair and cruel.

[ariainstars]

"The Acolyte" is Cancelled

or

Why the Woke Controversy is Getting Ridiculous

In all honesty, I didn’t go crazy for The Acolyte. I found it rather mediocre. But I had already read and heard so much discussion and criticism about it, both from people who hate it and from the ones who liked it, before and after the second season was cancelled, that I watched it just in order to form my own opinion.

What’s Positive

The Acolyte is a series that doesn’t thrive on fanservice. Finally new characters, new perspective, no reference to characters or events from the classic movies. It’s not a great series, but at least it's something new and fresh.

It’s not a story of Good vs. Bad. Everybody is human and fallible. And people get to step into other people’s shoes instead of simply judging them - Mae putting on Osha’s clothes, Osha putting on Qimir’s helmet etc.

“The Force does not belong to the Jedi.” (Luke Skywalker in The Last Jedi)

Yes, some in the galaxy far, far away call it The Thread. And use it their own way. Both ways might be wrong. That’s what The Acolyte is about: Osha is raised by two very different mentalities and finds both don’t suit her, so she joins Qimir who is also looking to find his own path.

The Controversy

No, the show is not perfect by a long shot, but everything I read and hear about how bad it is, how lesbians and diversity and wokeness are at the root of the problem is stupid.

1. The Acolyte is not about lesbians. The central relationships are a) between two sisters, b) a Jedi and his apprentice (father-daughter relationship) and c) a male and female former Jedi (erotic relationship? maybe? wasn’t made clear enough).

2. No one was gendered by Disney in Star Wars. Characters are heterosexual or you don’t find out if they have a sexuality at all because it doesn’t matter for the story. If Aniseya (the twin’s mother figure) and Mother Koril (the woman who bore them) are a couple, I noticed no love, partnership or erotic spark between them.

3. The two main characters of The Acolyte grow up in an all-female society, but that has nothing to do with the glorification of lesbians or hatred against men. The women distrust the Jedi because they want to take their daughters; they never say or show that they hate men. Also, the Jedi who want to take the girls include two female ones.

4. The Dathomir witches Asajj Ventres belonged to were an all-female, coven, too. Nothing new here. (In Dune we have the Bene Gesserit, also all female). No one called them a bunch of lesbians, to my knowledge.

5. The most impressive fighter and Force user in the entire show is Qimir aka the Stranger. A guy. We even got to see him naked. Yup, definitively a guy. Not a woman or anything in between.

6. I noticed nothing erotic (lesbian or otherwise) in the entire show. The only time we feel a little erotic spark is when Qimir openly flirts with Osha, i.e. a guy with a girl, and that isn’t even requited by her. Amandla Stenberg, the actress who portrays Osha and Mae, came out as non-binary, but that doesn’t mean anything in this connection because the two characters she plays aren’t (or if they are, it’s never said).

What Is Actually Behind It? The Usual Thing...

Jedi Stans

Many die-hard Star Wars fans are upset because the Jedi Knights have always been some sort of infallible superheroes to them. More recent productions show that the Jedi are actually the problem. George Lucas himself had already done that with the prequels; they weren’t as well received, but he was still the creator of the classic films, and at the time there was no social media, so the backlash wasn't as vicious as today.

Sol: “She was just a child.” The Stranger: “You brought her here.”

„The majority of my colleagues can’t imagine a galaxy without the Jedi. And I can understand why. When you’re looking up to heroes, you don’t have to face what’s right in front of you.“

„I think the Jedi are a massive system of unchecked power posing as a religion. A delusional cult that claims to control the uncontrollable. You project an image of goodness and restraint. But it’s only a matter of time before one of you snaps. And when, not if that happens, who will be strong enough to stop him?” (Senator Rayencourt to Master Vernestra)

It’s words like these, and the actions that prove them, that makes die-hard fans get out of their minds with rage. Because it’s the truth, a truth they have spent decades ignoring. Still in the classics, Obi-Wan and Yoda tried to manipulate Luke to push him to commit patricide. Ben Solo is what Luke would have become: a self-loathing patricide burning in an inner hell. And we see over and over how a Jedi is the first to draw a weapon although they are allegedly trained to fight only in defense. The Jedi have made so many mistakes and committed so many sins that I could spend hours writing about nothing else. But woe if you dare to attack the alleged heroes who can make things float and have shiny sabers and a detached, uncaring attitude (or at least, pretend to have it).

If a Star Wars show had Jedi for protagonists and these would be the infallible, all-wise superheroes hardcore fans take them for, these fans wouldn't mind one bit if these Jedi were black, Asian, female, lesbians, non-binary or anything else. They would swallow it all, hook, line and sinker.

Some YouTubers Apparently Don't Have a Life

Now Star Wars is owned by Disney, and the antis see the studios as an enemy they need to fight tooth and nails because apparently, there is no life without a fight. These fans are a much bigger problem than the studios. Thanks to social media, any idiot can easily post their unthinking, hateful opinion online and gain a following of fans who are of the exact same opinion but would never listen to another perspective, or watch the tv show in question in the first place.

This whole discourse just shows what a polarized world we live in. You don’t like something, so you „fight” against the supposed bad guys who are responsible (in this case the Disney studios).

The Acolyte had few viewers because apparently many fans watched and listened to haters online instead of watching the actual show and forming an opinion of their own. Also, it is well known that the author is a lesbian and the protagonist identifies as non-binary, so that’s enough of a reason to reject it.

How progressive. I remember learning how in feudalist Europe the nobility refused to listen to Händel or Rossini because not being of noble birth, they allegedly couldn’t be good composers.

My point is that Star Wars stans should at least give a film or a tv show a chance instead of bowing down to preconceived notions, expectations, entitlement and influencers who they probably don’t even know personally.

After The Last Jedi, there was bullying and even death threats en masse; it already started with the prequels, Ahmed Best became depressed and Jake Lloyd schizophrenic. Kelly Marie Tran and Daisy Ridley had to cancel all of their online accounts. And these are just a few examples. I wouldn’t want to produce or work on Star Wars. There is no reason to be so aggressive over a piece of media.

I don’t like the „woke” agenda either, the victimization of minorities is ridiculous and counterproductive.

But please, who hates The Acolyte should at least a) watch the series and stick to the facts and b) look at themselves first. Female heroes, black / Asian actors, queer characters are not the problem here. It’s their hero worship of the Jedi and their misguided idea of what a „true hero“ ought to be like that’s at the bottom of all of their hatred. Die-hard fans still feel personally offended because Luke Skywalker had actually taken responsibility for his faults and drank green milk; they can record hours of YT videos where they keep ranting about every single shot of The Last Jedi, never admitting that they hate it because they feel like their personal pride got a blow on purpose. They would never listen to fans who actually liked that film, and why.

Some problems, really. These alleged fans ought to get a life instead of spending years and years hating on Disney, Kathleen Kennedy etc. because Their Heroes were (shocking) taken off their pedestal and humanized.

What also gets me is how utterly entitled and ungrateful these fans are. Ever since 2015 Disney has produced plenty of good Star Wars content until now: Rogue One, Andor, The Mandalorian, The Bad Batch, the 7th season of The Clone Wars, Ahsoka, The Force Awakens, just to name a few. Most fans agree that these are good or at least solid work. But as soon as something comes out that they don’t like, they forget all about that and rave that Disney should sell the franchise to more competent authors, or that at least the current board of directors should be fired and replaced.

Really? Listen to Rachel Zegler telling everybody what she thinks of 1937 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, the film that actually laid the ground for the studio’s success and wealth, and that she’s supposed to be starring in the remake. There’s a person who ought to be sacked right away for her disrespect of the original and overall entitlement.

Star Wars Is Not Owned by the Haters

In the end, a good story is a good story because it’s well told, not because of the ideals it (apparently) wants to convey.

Star Wars, ever from the start, was not about Good vs. Evil but about the power of love. The fact that the Jedi are not the good guys but fallible though well-meaning people is what makes them interesting. It’s not the author’s fault if so many fans believe that a good story must be Good vs. Evil and that there is no alternative to that. Star Wars started out as a fairy tale, it’s not your average action movie franchise.

I would like many of the antis have to do the actual work, i.e. write and produce a Star Wars show or movie, and do better. Most of them wouldn’t get two sentences together because all they know how to do is to hate on people who actually are creative, even if the result of that creativity isn’t perfect.

So, I suggest we, the more moderate fans, take a stand. Why have we allowed the antis to hate on Disney and on Star Wars in general since The Last Jedi came out? Why are our voices not louder? Why do we always hope for something better to happen?

The studios are drowning in hatred, for all the wrong reasons. It’s a pity that the more aggressive and stupid voices are also the loudest.

I would have liked to see a second season of The Acolyte, just to see where the characters would go. So would many other fans.

Let’s speak up. As for me personally, I’m sick of getting invested in stories and then let down.

Have a nice day.

[lingeringmirth]

more than you know

Stranger Things | Stevie & Mrs Harrington | Rating: T | Words: 531 | Angst, Transfeminine Steve Harrington, Stevie has bad parents, platonic stobin (background).

CW: deadnaming

Written for @whumpril day 3: sweat | Also here on AO3.

Stevie’s mother is furious, but few would have known it. 

Hers is always a cold fury, one of looks and restrained emotions, carefully selected words aimed to slash. Now, only the way her hand shook gave her away… the hand which was holding a dress like it was something disgusting.

‘What were you thinking, Steven? This is…’

Her mother apparently can’t find the words as she stares at her, eyes rowing over her long hair and her make-up.

Hearing that name hurts, but she doesn’t dare correct her.

‘Do you have no shame?’ her mother asks, another stab into her gut, voice a hiss, low even when there’s no-one in the usually empty big house but the two of them, the perfect socialite wife and her failure of a child.

Shame is something Stevie is familiar with, intimately, from the shame of needing to learn how to dodge questions from well-meaning adults to stealing her mother’s clothes when her parents were away and hoping she could sneak them back in before they got back. Shame is looking at the women’s clothing section at the store and glancing lovingly at the make-up department, snatching lipsticks from the girls she kisses who call her King, whom she holds and makes feel good while she envies their softness and femininity.

Shame is a name that isn’t hers, should never have been hers, a body that doesn’t fit her true self, one that she’s had to make her image, however imperfect.

‘More than you know, but this…’ she gestures at herself, at her blouse and skirt, all the places she’s made herself soft and the places she hopes to, some day, ‘...I refuse to be ashamed of this any longer.’

She’s teetering on the brink of being disowned, she’s known that the moment Margaret Harrington had stepped in through the door and found her getting ready for a girls night with Robin. These are her last moments in this house.

She’s glad even if she’s terrified.

Her mother looks at her, really looks at her, the dress shaking in her grasp as she does so. Then she sniffs, dropping the offending garment onto the floor like it’s garbage. ‘Get rid of it. All of it. I won’t tell your father about this if you’re finished before he comes home in an hour. You wouldn’t like what he’d have to say.’

Then the woman who has never wanted to know who she truly is spins on her heel and strides out of her room without a hair out of place, impeccably dressed in her skirt suit.

Stevie does as she’s asked, carefully packing everything she can into her duffle and the rest into a box she’s had under her bed for months. She shakes as she walks down the stairs in the dress Margaret had thrown to the floor like trash, her head held high.

She doesn’t look back as Margaret Harrington calls after her, only once, sharp and in an undertone, after all, it’s not her name and the Harrington’s never really had a son, did they?

In her Beemer, she drives to Robin’s and she’s never been more terrified and free in her life.

[electricbluebutterflies]

“rise and shine, sweet thing." for hellcheer

PG-ish, pre-relationship, also on ao3.

It takes Chrissy a hot moment to piece together the last twelve hours or so of her life.

Body, intact but with the kind of pulsing headache that reminds her that canned margaritas do not mess around. Clothes still on as she remembers them. Currently curled up under a ridiculous amount of blankets on a couch that’s probably older than she is. Currently…

“Rise and shine, sweet thing.”

There are, at least, some very obvious explanations for all of the above. She’ll take what she can get.

It takes Chrissy a few more moments to open her eyes, to fully process that the boy she has a crush on is hovering over her, and the first thing she thinks is that his hair is apparently a mess in the mornings and braiding it before sleep would really help and-

She shouldn’t be having these thoughts yet. A certain part of her brain figures she might as well, given everything else, but-

“I didn’t dream,” she says before he can even ask. “Promise.”

The way she sees it, the way she explains this particularly long summer, Eddie Munson is a person constantly in need of a project and protecting her keeps him out of trouble. It’s a decent trade, all factors considered, and Chrissy’s gotten all too comfortable with it, and-

“Good to know, also not my starting question.”

“Which was going to be…?”

“I know you’re an ethereal being and all, but that couch is still not something anyone falls asleep on voluntarily.”

There are… definitely a few questions she has about what goes on in his mind sometimes, but she’s decided his intentions to treat her like a fairy princess are at least harmless so it’s easier to just let those comments go. Sweet, if a little weird, and-

“And I did because…?”

“I suggested the floor. We compromised.”

Again. Canned margaritas do not mess around.

“You could’ve moved me. I’m tiny enough.”

“Wasn’t sure…”

“I trust you. And I don’t remember that part of the night anyways. A few moments in your arms probably wouldn’t have registered.”

“Still. Principle of the thing. Don’t do anything to questionably conscious women. Except make a blanket nest for them, I wasn’t sure…”

Late summer in southern Indiana isn’t the time of year most people want cocoon mode, but Chrissy runs cold – small body, almost no fat on her even now – and she’s not complaining about her current condition. “Perfectly fine.”

“I don’t… do this. I’m not-“

He’s particularly cute when he’s awkward, she thinks, not quite blushy but like the boy version of it all the same, usual confidence ignored for a while and-

Her hands poke out of the blanket nest and take his. “You take care of me. You’re good at that.”

“Least I can-“

“Stop, okay? You’re real and… it means a lot to me.”

This isn’t what they could become, she knows, not yet and maybe not for a while. She’s taking a year off before college – needs to make sure she’s physically okay before she moves an hour and a half from home – and her mom’s hoping she’ll use that time to find a nice boy and get married and… she’s done one of those things, and the other could still absolutely happen, and-

“Good reminder you have low standards,” Eddie laughs.

“Eclectic, not low.”

“Remind me, you drink bad instant coffee?”

“I do when I’m here…”

He takes care of her, she thinks as she shifts her position under the blanket nest and decides she doesn’t get why he hates that couch so much. Maybe, maybe someday she’ll take care of him too.

[everlasting-rainfall]

Just reread your ocs and I missed them 🥺

Hope we see more of them , Im actually curious have you made any new ocs ? You mentioned something about Kid 🤔

ooh have you got any art on Saffron maybe even Willow?

I wonder how did she get pregnant by Maria , did Maria ask Ivankov to change her into a man or is Maria secretly a futa?

For Willow I find her very interesting , I wonder though what’s gonna happen to her when Roger gets Executed , Rouge died at childbirth ( will Willow be Ace second mother 👀)

Does Willow get a bad ending like Roger did or will she be sailing the seas with shanks or buggy maybe she be staying with Rayleigh and shakky ?

last thing to say is that I hope your doing ok 💗

🌺Anon

Aww, that’s so kind of you to say, flower friend! It makes me happy to hear that you missed my OC’s, it makes me feel like they’re really good characters!

Anywho, yes I do actually have other OC’s! Multiple actually! I have a lot of fan-kids but I never intend to post about them on this blog as I don’t think that those characters should be present on a blog like this, it would make me feel weird personally

But as for my adults, I have 20+ of them! There’s quite a few of them and I mentioned in another post who they are but just in case you didn’t see that or haven’t seen it at the time of this post then lemme repost who they are alongside their S/O

Sleepyhead Estelle and Caesar Clown

The Snow Woman Talvi and Dalton

Infiltrator Thalassa and Magellan, Sadi-Chan, Domino

Investigative Reporter Honey and Big News Morgans

Time Traveller Paislee and Joyboy

IRL Girl Vanessa and Baccarat, Whitey Bay, Wanda, Hina

Clothing Designer Morticia and Law, X-Drake, Hawkins, Sanji

NSFW Star Nova and Oven

Travelling Selkie Lorna and Laskey

Community Leader Esther and Garling (DON’T LOOK HIM UP IF YOU DONT WANT MANGA SPOILERS)

Glass Artist Soleil and Cobra, Pell, Chaka

IRL Artist Ariel and Kalgara, Herb, Noland, Acorn (Noland’s Wife)

Something Something Water Ember and Sabo, Ace

Morticia’s Model Unnamed Goth Bunny and Penguin, Shachi

I know that I have mentioned Kid but his S/O is one that I’d rather not talk about so unfortunately you’ll never get to see them so my sincerest of apologies but anywho��� Let’s get into it!

I don’t actually have any art on them that isn’t made in Gacha but I do however have aesthetic boards that I’ll post at the bottom of this post! I hope that you enjoy them!

!-MINORS DO NOT INTERACT FOR ANY REASON-!

!-POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNINGS-!

Futa, Strap-On’s, Impregnation, Abuse, Isolation, Death Mention, Dream Crushing, Hallucinations, Dark Fairycore Imagery

!-POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNINGS-!

!-MINORS DO NOT INTERACT FOR ANY REASON-!

So when it comes to a lot of female characters that I ship with my OC’s, I like to imagine what kind of children they would have together and also I have an easier time writing and imagining sex with someone who has a dick and someone who has a pussy versus two people who have pussies

As a result, Black Maria getting Saffron pregnant is usually explained via Devil Fruit shenanigans or just isn’t explained at all, Black Maria isn’t the only one either as Ulti is also capable of getting Saffron pregnant and each of Saffron’s S/O’s want to be able to make her have their babies

But yeah basically, that’s why so it’s safe to assume that if I’m writing fictional women having intercourse with my OC’s then it’s either strap on or just that they have a dick so that’s the explanation

I guess in unexplained scenarios, those two scenarios of Ivankov changing the female into a male or them secretly being a futa could work but typically I try not to think too hard about it beyond weird side effect of Devil Fruit or something as then I think too much about it and the smut idea that I had winds up going nowhere

I think the furthest that I’ve ever thought about it is that after sex, the dick just kinda goes away and now there’s just two women but anyways that’s enough of that sort of talk now

Willow is by no means then strongest member of the Roger Pirates like she’s pretty tough, don’t get me wrong but she’s nothing compared to the people on Roger’s crew and considering the bounty on all of them it caused some pretty strong people to be after them

So considering that it’s very likely that she has a bounty on her head, it’s likely that Willow could get a bad ending where she’s captured by an enemy and locked up but considering Rayleigh is also her husband, I doubt that she would be locked up for long

I have mentally played around with the idea of Willow returning to the island where they found her after Roger’s execution only to find her father gone so she lives out the rest of her days in solitude but absolutely none of her S/O’s would allow that so her only bad ending winds up being beaten to death by her father after she didn’t meet Roger and them

As a result, she’s likely alive and in scenarios where Rayleigh and Shakky raised Ace then I can see her acting as another mother to Ace like if Rouge is 1st Mom and Shakky is 2nd Mom then Willow is 3rd Mom plus honestly I can see her telling the best bedtime stories about witches flying through the night and using magic

In scenarios where Ace was raised by Dadan then I can imagine that Willow might be Rayleigh and Shakky but she might also be with Gaban, I can’t really see her as being with Shanks and Buggy like I can see her remaining in contact with them but probably not going with them as despite having a love for running through the woods at night and wanting to be a witch, Willow actually does value calm times

Speaking of Witch by the way, I forgot to really expand upon her so I’ll give a quick explanation as to who she is and why she matters when it comes to Willow and her character

Basically when Willow was young, Willow wanted to be a witch so badly when she grew up to the point where she would pretend cast spells and run around with a broom but her Dad crushed her dreams and forced her to give up on that in favor of being a farmer who takes care of all their needs

These years of isolation and living with only a shit father to keep her company caused Willow’s mental state to take a hit so this prompted the creation of what is kind of like a hallucination and it’s an entity known simply as Witch who embodies everything that Willow wanted to be when she grew up but couldn’t

Witch is her entirely own separate being as she appears to be able to react to things that Willow can’t actively see but despite that, she comes from Willow and refuses to elaborate beyond that on what she is and where she came from

However luckily Witch is incapable of interacting with anything, she can’t even touch Willow and is basically a ghost as she can’t touch anything or be seen by anyone as even Rayleigh doesn’t know when Witch is around however he is aware of her existence

No one but Willow can see Witch but the Roger Pirates are aware of Witch’s existence due to Willow telling them, Witch also encourages her to be a version of her that she wants to see like if Willow happens to disobey someone or take that extra minute on a break from her duties then Witch encourages it

But she’s also a bit of a little shit as she enjoys scaring Willow and just popping out of the weirdest places, Witch has gotten a lot calmer though ever since Rouge chewed her out and trust me as being chewed out by a beautiful lady who can’t see you but is clearly pissed at you is terrifying

And that’s it! Here are the Aesthetic Boards that I promised you as well!

[disco-cola]

the world is just getting worse and worse seemingly in my AREA (like literally just my tiny ass part of suburb) in the last 5 DAYS there’s been a SA on a woman (literally not even an HOUR after I walked the exact same path with my dog, I was there shortly after 10 PM and it happened shortly after 11), and two violent fights between strangers who just randomly got attacked by other men and a girl trying to help was pushed into the track bed MINUTES before the train was due to arrive and then there also was an attempted robbery with a kn1fe and im not even kidding or exaggerating I wish I fucking was but all of those things happened like 2-5 minutes fucking walking distance from my apartment I usually enjoyed taking my doggo on a bigger walk after dark especially now that it’s way too hot during daytime also my social anxiety is better when it’s dark and not that many people out anymore it was just so cozy and comfortable and I always stayed in my area which is well lit and where there’s a lot of apartment buildings around but as we see that means absolutely nothing (also the woman who got SA‘d was literally on the phone and she MUST have walked past my apt building bc its en route to where she was headed and around here she must’ve been approached by a man asking where the station is so she pointed him in the right direction and he then turned around and followed her instead like she was just a coincidental v!ctim) like I feel so unsafe I don’t dare to go out after 10 PM anymore ☺️ also all of those things were commited by men ☺️ as if it isn’t bad enough that a lot of women me included feel the need to dress and walk differently after a certain time of night ☺️ like i only go out in something baggy with a hood covering my hair wide or straight pants and combat boots and i try to walk like a dude my only benefit is i am 5ft7 and don’t look petite in baggy clothes it must be even scarier if you’re shorter in height

[therabbitthatpostthings]

I have been addicted to watching those phone short dramas. They are all so bad and the Chinese ones always such good production value. The English ones have like non of the surrounding mics to make the audio better (boom mics???). You can always tells when one is made by the same company cause they reuse sets and clothing so often.

Every story is the same, they have like 4 plot lines:

Some rich women hides her wealth from others and the others treat her badly and calm her a poor poor gutter bitch until she reveals herself as the rich girl and they all regret it.

Some poor girl divorces her cheating loser husband and is poor again but falls in love with a rich guy who is richer than the guy she left.

Some man (or woman sometimes) is the CEO on disguise or is not recognized and gets flash married to another person who is usually rich (not always) to get back at their cheating partner.

Some wife (regardless of wealth) is made into a maid of the husband’s rich family and treated badly, she was usually tricked, pressured, manipulated or was blinded by love and married him. The husband gets another woman pregnant or is saying he did and that woman becomes a bully as well. He usually has a sister and/or mean mom. If he loves the wife and doesn’t know about the abuse, 9/10 they get back to together by the end. If he hates her, he will regret his actions and/or try to kill her when she moves on. If the wife is seen with another rich guy, that’s usually her brother and they claim she’s sleeping with him cause god forbid a woman have family. And then they have some half assed explanation on why this emotionally constipated man CANNOT communicate with his WIFE about his insecurities that lead to this domino tower of abuse and hatred. Also the mistress is usually lying about the baby or they both know the baby isn’t his but his late brothers kid and to save their reputations they say it’s his and NEVER mention to the wife cause the mom wants the wife gone anyway.

Sane plot as the last time but this time she has three older brothers, the oldest is always the CEO of the family business that she will be working at (and sometimes get bullied when/if she goes undercover, usually by the mistress), middle kid is a doctor, youngest is an artist/musician (usually the beloved one by the husbands sister). The mistress is usually pretending to be the rich brother’s sister or claims to be related to them usually by an uncle. In the end she rather marries the eldest brother cause he’s actually adopted or if she only has one brother, she marries his best friend who she was engaged to in childhood. This plot line also works three suitors unrelated to her and she’ll go with the one she’s known the longest, the one the audience is usually rooting for anyway.

Or better yet, all of these are the same but there were Asian dramas first and got remade into English and the translators did not account for many things so you have people referring to MIL as Auntie, husband are brother and wife as sister. All poorly translated honorifics.

I EAT IT UP EVERYTIME- it’s so shitty yet I love it. God I haven’t even mentioned the English variants of werewolves/lycans, mafia, Cinderella stories, flash marriages, the ceo who was kidnapped as a kid and saved by a random girl and then meets her years later and does everything to make her fall in love with him, secret/masked heiress.

THE PERIOD DRAMAS-

God I love these-

[yulin-pop]

↛ ❀ 2023 Kickoff

Neige Leblanche

“ This plushie looks like you. “ | “It’s so ugly though.”

“Im sorry to drag you out here like this…” Neige laughed as he adjusted his hat downward. Under his mask, he was grinning. You glanced at him momentarily and shrugged.

“You don’t have to worry. I wanted to get away for once. Even if it’s with you.” You bitterly said. Despite the unruly words, he sparkled and embraced you.

“You’re so nice even if you don’t act like it!”

“Hey! Your hat is gonna slip!”

“You really do care.”

After you got him off of you, you bashfully looked around the mall you’ve never even been to before. “So what exactly are you looking for?”

“I want to find more cloth styles! Apparently some people are getting bored of my usual things so I thought I’d switch it up.” He brightly said. You looked him up and down and sighed.

You saw one store and immediately grabbed his hand to pull him along. It was hard to find something that looked bad on a pretty boy like him. He had that princess face— he would definitely look good with even women’s clothes!

You didn’t want to admit that, of course.

The bags began to actually weigh both of you down at some point. You suggested you go back and drop off the tons of bags of clothes he got today.

This boy is loaded and isn’t afraid to spend it.

You thought as you loaded all of it up into the car. Your arms ached majorly. You carried the equal amount of bags but somehow he had a fair amount of arm strength.

You went back in for a snack and sat down with a pretzel in your hand, a coffee in your other. You quickly gobbled it down as you’ve been worn out by running around carrying those bags for your prince boyfriend. You noticed his quiet giggle as he covered his smile with the palm of his hand.

You stared at him with a soft gaze he didn’t even notice. His happy face was something to behold. All you could do was stare and fall into a trance. But you noticed he pulled his mask down. You brought your hand out and pushed up the mask he wore to cover his face. He turned his head with wide eyes.

“Don’t forget you’re a celebrity. You know you’ll be chased down by all those girls for hours if they recognize you.” You quickly said.

He stared a little longer and smiled. You didn’t need to see his full face to know. He laughed and stood up again.

“I want to buy you something! What store do you want to go to?” He confidently stated. You pulled on his arm and shook your head.

“I don’t need anything. Didn’t we come for you to begin with?”

He didn’t listen to a single word you said as he looked around and pointed at an interesting store. “This one?”

“Neige!!”

Though he ushered you into the store and you got a good look at what type of store it is.

“This is a stuffed animal store…”

“Yes! Isn’t it charming?” He asked you. “One of my fans bought me a plushie from here and it was seriously just adorable.”

Am I jealous over that? No way it’s just a fan…

The walls were pink and well lit, very pastel everywhere. There were a lot of little kids wondering around with their parents chasing after them.

You were a bit surprised at this sudden change in air. Neige politely took your hand and led you around. The plushies were popular with children and a funny detail you noticed was the ones of the lower shelves were completely sold out. It seemed Neige made the same observation and you two giggled with each other.

“This frog is funny looking…” You use your other hand to pick it up and spin it around.

A small chuckle draws you attention back to Neige. He comes closer and shows you an odd creature in a banana costume.

“ This plushie looks like you. “ Neige cheered with pure adoration in his eyes. You glanced at the plush then glance at him.

“It’s so ugly though.”

You quickly slapped your hand over your mouth and Neige audibly gasped. The wave of absolute guilt washes over you.

“N-n-n-no I didn’t mean it like that!”

He nodded his head but his eyes were slowly beginning to water.

“I mean it’s ugly but in a cute way. The plushie is really cute but the somewhat less “aww” type cute but more like “ahaha” type cute!!” You tried to console him.

Before you could speak again, you noticed a small girl behind Neige. She wiped her face with her sleeve with her other hand pointing at you and Neige as her father tried to comfort her.

“We can just order it online, okay?”

“N-no! I wanna have matching dolls with Reyna!” The girl cried to her dad. He glanced over at you two and pat her head.

Neige checked the tag of the plushie and realized it was one part of a matching set. You two shared a look and you gently approached the girl with the plushie in your hand.

“Hi, did you want this?” You got down around her level. She continued to sob and nodded. You smiled at her and held it forward. “You can match with Reyna now! It’s all yours.”

Instantly, her expression changed from miserable to shock. She took it into her hands, you could tell in her eyes how happy she really was.

“I’ll pay!” Neige said gallantly. The father disagreed but Neige insisted without even hearing our the father. “Say, what’s your name?”

“Amoy…”

“Well, Amoy, maybe we could even get accessories for your new stuffie?”

Just as expected Neige was great with kids.

The girl walked away with her father, in absolute bliss. They both thanked you two a lot and you were happy. The plushie seemed like the world to her.

“Maybe it was less about what it was but just for Reyna… Maybe she just wanted to match with her.” Neige thought aloud.

“She must really like her.”

You looked at each other again and he made a face of realization. “I still need to buy you a plushie!”

He turned around but you grabbed his arm. “It’s fine. Just buy me food instead.”

“That’s not romantic at all!”

You shook your head and pulled him towards the exit, “Doesn’t matter to me. It’ll make me happier than a stuffed animal.”

(He ended up delivering a huge bear plushie to your house and a flower bouquet.)

[sableseb]

Sweater Weather

Lee Bodecker x f!character

word count: 3.9k

warnings: smut, car sex, loss of virginity, age gap, stalking, dry humping, fingering, dirty talk

tags: @harrysthiccthighss​ @fuckandfluff​ @meetmeatyourworst​ @hallecarey1​ @sparksforkoo​ @buckysboobs​ @buckydaddy​ @stucky-my-ship​ @bemine-bucky​ @greeneyedblondie44​ @thewritingdoll​ 

a/n: This story is for my friend @bucky-soldat​ ‘s Graduation Celebration! I chose the prompt, “I’m not interested in her sweater. It’s what’s underneath her sweater that counts.” Which, heavily inspired this fic. I had to do Lee. He just called to me for this one. I hope you love!.x

Being Sheriff of a bum fuck town never really holds a wow factor. Lee knows. Sure he has that rush when there’s a robbery, or when he breaks up bar fights. But, at its core, this town is about as interesting as the asphalt roads he patrols daily.

But, that all changed as Lee found himself a fixation one evening. After another day of the same ole speeding tickets, he saw her in the April sun, walking alone with her head down on the sidewalk, skirt to her knees with a sweater that seemed a few sizes too big. He instantly fell smitten.

She’s a cure for the sheer boredom he’s experienced most of his law abiding career. She’s something that captivates him. She seems so timid, so palpable. Just thinking about how easy it’d be to use her made his cock harden.

He often finds himself wondering if she’s got a body under all the shaggy clothing. Is she tight and thin? Curvy and soft? He needs to find out soon, keeping an eye on her from afar isn’t cutting it.

“You’re doin’ that thing again,” his deputy drawls, grabbing Lee’s attention.

He whips his head to the side, eyeing the young man who’s currently accompanying him on his patrol today. “What thing,” he asks with a pointed tone. The Sheriff never particularly liked being called out by someone who’s beneath him.

“I see the way you side eye that girl every time we watch this street. You’re whipped, boss.”

Lee’s jaw ticks. He hates the fact he’s so transparent when it comes to her, almost as much as he hates the amusement lacing his deputy’s words. But, he doesn’t comment. He just turns his heavy gaze back to his girl because he knows the boy sitting next to him is right. She has him wrapped around those slender fingers and she doesn’t even know it.

~~~

Lee becomes familiar with her routine. He knows her habits like the back of his hand. He didn’t mean to clock her every move, he just slept better at night knowing she’s safe. He’s witnessed one too many men get handsy with the women around here. He can’t have that happen to her. She’s for his touch only. 

He sits and waits in his cruiser like he always does, looking forward to seeing her emerge from school. Nineteen is a perfect age for him. Young, needing a man to look after her, care for her, fuck a baby into her. He can’t wait to fill her up, watch his seed slowly drip out of her as she begs for more. 

He watches as she walks out the double doors wearing a skirt that’s a little shorter than her usual wear and that same damned sweater. Her socks come to rest just below her knees, somewhat blocking out the harsh bite the air holds. 

The picture of innocence. Lee couldn’t find it in himself to care one bit about her age. Not when she made him feel things so acutely. He has this overwhelming urge to protect and corrupt her, to cherish and destroy her. He’s tired of looking from afar. 

Each Friday she goes down to the river bank and sits. She never did anything other than watch the ripples as they broke the flow of the water. So, Lee wasn’t surprised to see her walk her way down the same hill that she does at the end of each week as he tailed her. He always admires when she gets lost in her head. She seems at peace, content with the world around her.

He almost feels bad for intruding while she’s in her mind...Almost. 

“It’s awfully frigid to be sittin’ on a bank ain’t it?”

She whips her head around. She didn’t even hear him come down the trail she took moments prior. Fear is prominent on her face, but she soon realizes that it’s him and relaxes. “Sheriff,” she sighs, “you scared me.”

He takes her in. She’s sitting on a rock, knees tucked under her chin, a slight tremble to her frame, books scattered near her side. Her hair is wild and mused from the breeze, eyes bright from the midday sun. He wishes he had a camera on him. She looks like a work of art.

“Didn’t mean to, darlin’. Just checking in on you.”

Lee sees her shy away from him, obviously taken back by his statement. Did no one care to look out for her? That’s absurd. How could nobody care to make sure she’s okay?

“I’m fine, I pro-“

Thunder rolls in the distance, halting her mid sentence as clouds start to cover the sky. He looks up, it’s going to pour something ugly and soon. He can’t have her out here, can’t have her walk all the way home in the rain.

Lee extends a hand to her. “Why don’t I give you a ride home? It’s gonna storm soon.”

She looks hesitant as she contemplates his offer, looking at his hand and then towards the sky. A drop of rain hits her cheek and that’s all it takes for her to lay her cold palm in his.

She hops off the rock with his help before moving down to pick up her books. Lee can’t help but to rake his eyes over her hunched position as she retrieves her belongings. Her skirt rides up, showing more of the smooth flesh of her thighs with her ass slightly outlined in the flowing fabric. 

He imagines having her hold her ankles as he takes her from behind, leaving his hand prints across the ample cheeks of her backside while tears stream down her face as she begs him to ease up, begs him to slow down cause that little pussy of her’s can’t take the stretch, the pain. 

Once she has herself situated, Lee leads the way back up the dirt path as the rain starts a steady downpour. They rush to the cruiser before they get completely soaked. As he shuts the driver side door, he looks over to his girl. She’s shaking, the sleeves of her sweater pulled over her fists, hair damp. But, what he notices the most...she’s in his space. He can’t have her leave him without a taste of what she has to offer.

He switches the heat on for her. She gives him a little smile and mutters a thank you, turning her attention back to her lap. Lee is an observant man, smart and intuitive. So, when he sees her shy away from him, not holding his eye for more than mere seconds, he knows it’s either because he’s Sheriff or because she’s attracted to him and his presence. Closing herself off so she doesn’t seem like a fool. God, he prays it’s the second.

She hasn’t the slightest clue on his feelings towards her. Every bump in at community functions, running into each other when grocery shopping, keeping his space but always making sure his eyes are on her, it’s been torture to his mind and heart. He never made a move because deep down, he fears rejection, fears what he’ll do if those plump lips utter the word no.

Today, he’s going to show her exactly what she does to him. He’s sick of the constant gap between them. He knows he has to be careful not to scare her off, knows that if she reciprocates his feelings they’ll have to sneak around until his election is over and he gets out of his dirty, under the table dealings. Lee isn’t going to jeopardize her safety with the shit he brought upon himself.

He didn’t realize how bad the storm was hitting while he was lost in thought. Looking out the windshield, he can barely see the road in front of him. The rain engulfs the cruiser in a gray blanket with how fast and heavy it’s falling. There’s no way he can navigate these back roads in this condition.

“We’re gonna have to wait this storm out, that okay, darlin’,” he asks while pulling off to park on the side of the road.

“Yeah, it’s okay.”

Silence hangs heavy as they sit and wait. The patter of rain on the metal roof would be calming in any other situation. But, right now? Lee doesn’t comprehend anything other than the weak-kneed little thing sitting to his right. She’s close, but not close enough.

“Here,” he grunts as he picks up her books in the middle of them. She watches in confusion as he leans over the front seat to place her books in the back. “You’re shiverin’. Let me warm you up a bit, yeah?”

He watches intently to catch her reaction. It doesn’t surprise him that those doe eyes widen or that she fidgets with the hem of her sweater. But, what does catch him off guard is how easily she slides over to him and tucks herself underneath his awaiting arm. 

So, he thinks, she does take a likin’ towards me.

He sits there with a grin on his face, a skip in his chest, and a pretty girl resting upon him. His pretty girl. The one he’s dreamed of having. The thing with Lee though, is that you give an inch, he’ll take a mile.

“I know how we can get you warmed up faster, darlin’.”

She raises slightly to look up at him. “How, Sheriff?”

Lee takes him arm away from her shoulders, shifting her back a bit so he can cusp her cool cheeks in his palms. He hears her breath hitch as he leans in close, lips barely brushing hers. She makes no move to pull herself from his grasp. He takes that as a sign to continue.

“You ever been with a man before?”

Her body tightens up and her eyes widen. Her hands have a firm grip on the end of her sleeves. She’s visibly taken back, but interest swirls behind those eyes and, is that shame there too?

“I-I’ve never done anything. With anyone,” she stutters out, forcing herself to look anywhere but his face. “Does that...bother you?”

He lets out a little laugh, trying his hardest to mask a groan that threatens to slip. His sweetheart wants it, wants this, wants him. No one’s tainted her skin, got to experience her in the form God created. 

“No, honey. Not one bit. You gonna let me show you how it feels?”

She finally meets his gaze. Worry is etched onto her soft features, her lip taking the brunt of her nerves as she threatens to chew the skin off. Lee slides his thumb from her cheek to her mouth, pulling her lip away from the onslaught of teeth. Slowly, he rubs the irritated skin as he waits for her answer. 

Time seems to slow as he looks into her eyes. The storm still rages on, not once breaking the trance each of them hold on the other. “I would like that,” she whispers.

He plants his lips against hers as soon as she gives him the go. He starts off by feverishly moving his mouth against hers. Then, his hands move from her face to her chest, kneading her breasts through the heavy fabric. This causes her mouth to open in a gasp, giving Lee the perfect opportunity to deepen the kiss.

His tongue moves along hers, sucking on it, biting it. He’s basking in her sweet taste and soft whimpers as his groping gets harsher. She’s struggling to keep up. He breaks the kiss to pull the sweater over her head.

He’s met with one of the prettiest sights he’s seen. Under the fabric that swallows her whole, there hides a sultry figure. Her heavy breasts are straining against the buttons of her white school uniform, her waist sinks in only to have her hips flare out. The cotton clings to her and accentuates every dip and curve. She’s beauty in the purest form.

He must have been staring too long because she’s cowering away, trying to shield herself from his lust blown eyes. Lee’s quick to grab her arms and drag her flush against his front. 

“You’ve been hidin’ all this?” He takes his nose and traces it along her jaw and up to her ear. He bites the lobe before whispering, “You’re gorgeous. You’re gonna move back to your seat and strip for me. Shirt, bra, panties. They come off. The skirt stays on. You got that?”

“Yes, sir,” she whimpers.

Lee’s cock jumps at her obedience. He grips her hair and pulls her head away from his. “Good girl. Now, give me a show.”

He leans back as she scoots her way over to her side of the vehicle. Her hands hold a slight tremble as she undoes her blouse one button at a time. He takes in each piece of skin that becomes exposed to him. He brings a hand down to his dick that’s pressing uncomfortably against his zipper. He palms himself, eyes never once leaving her body.

Her movements falter as she watches him please himself so brazenly. To Lee, it’s fucking hot how worked up she is, how easily it is to fluster her. She makes it to the last button and shrugs the long sleeved blouse off. She unclasped her bra, baring herself to him.

He believes he can cum from just watching her. Her tits are round and full, nipples hardening against the cool air of the cruiser. He’s itching to sink his teeth into the tight buds, hear her cry out to him as he sucks and nibbles the sensitive flesh.

Her underwear follows as she slides them down her long legs. “Put ‘em in the glove box. For safe keepin’,” he commands through clenched teeth as his grip on himself tightens. She places the baby pink fabric in the compartment and clicks it back in place.

“Now, come sit your pretty little self on my lap.” 

It’s not how he’d like to have taken her. He’d much rather strip away her innocence in his bed, behind his four walls instead of his stuffy police car. But, everything just worked out too perfectly today and he couldn’t wait any longer for her, not when she seamlessly fell into his arms.

Her skirt falls around them as she sits on her knees above him. Lee’s hands fall to her waist as he looks up at her. He runs them along her hips, her stomach, down to her thighs to bring them under her skirt. He snake his arms around her to grip her bare ass. 

“How do you get yourself off? Do you rub your clit? Stuff your pussy with your fingers? Shower head maybe?”

Her breathing picks up at his words and his continuously wandering hands. It should be a simple answer. But, she’s taking a lot longer than necessary to tell him her dirty secret. He waits nonetheless, chalking it up to her anxiousness. 

“If I tell you, will you promise not to think anything of it?”

Without hesitation he says, “Promise.” What is she so nervous about? It has him chomping at the bits. How dirty is his seemingly perfect angel?

“I use a pillow,” she rushes out, looking everywhere but him once again.

He knows he promised. But, how could he not think anything of that? He pictures her clad in nothing but tight panties, desperately trying to get off from the pillow between her thighs. It’s so debauched, so erotic. He makes a mental note to have her show him her nasty masturbation session later with his own pillows. Leave her scent on the very thing he lays his head upon each night.

“My girl ain’t as innocent as she seems, huh? Let me see how you hump your pillows, honey.” He pushes her down by her ass to rest her warm heat on his straining erection. Her gasp turns into a small grunt as he works her over his clothed length. She gets the hint.

She presses herself harder against him, putting more momentum in her hips as she grinds against him. Lee can physically feel how wet she is through his slacks. He aids her movements by still keeping a firm grip on her back side. He ruts up against her, adding more pressure to her clit.

Sweat breaks along her skin as she furiously moves against him, trying so hard to reach her high. Lee notices the tremble in her legs and how her moans picked up. He halts her movement and she lets out a pained whimper.

“Shh,” he cooed as he placed kisses along the expanse of her face. “Tell me. Tell me you want me to fuck you with my fingers.”

He moves a hand from her ass to her mound, rubbing the smooth skin before sliding his thumb down to circle her clit. She jerks at the sensation. “Please. I want your fingers, Lee. Fuck me with your fingers.”

He takes his thumb off her nerves. He rubs the length of her pussy with his hand. She rides his palm as he continues his teasing. “You’re so desperate. Don’t worry, darlin’. I’ll stretch ya out and let ya cum. Give this cunt what she needs.”

As soon as his middle finger breaches her hole, she falls forward and pushes her face into the crook of his neck. He can feel each puff of air she lets out as he drags his finger through her wet walls. Her arousal slides down his skin and coats her thighs.

“You got sucha tight cunt. She’s cryin’, baby. Feel how you’re fuckin’ soakin’ me?”

Lee adds another digit. The stretch has her whimpering as she tries her best to accommodate the foreign feeling. He lets her adjust, moving his wrist slowly as she gains the confidence to take his fingers. When she starts lifting her hips and sinking them back down against his hand, he takes it as to pick up the pace.

The sounds of her cries and her drenched heat bounce around the confines of the car. He’ll never get over the beautiful symphony. It’ll follow him around in the back of his mind for the rest of his days. 

“Lee,” she whimpers. “I’m gonna cum.”

“That’s right, honey. Go ahead and soak my hand. You earned it.”

Her body starts to pull taut above him. Her form is stiff and tight except for the shaking of her thighs. He keeps his fast pace, making sure his palm smacks her clit with each harsh thrust. He feels the sudden grip of her pussy around his fingers, feels the throb as her orgasm over takes her and leaves her a panting mess.

Lee pulls her off him. He brushes away the hair that’s clung around her face and takes in her blissed out expression. He leans in and captures her mouth with his, lips moving lazily as he lays her down on the leather seat.

Breaking away, he tells her, “Hold your skirt up for me.” 

Watching as she takes her dainty hands and pulls the fabric above her waist, he sucks his teeth, looking straight between her legs. She shines in the dull light of the storm, pussy swollen and slick. There’s not one part of her that isn’t a sight for sore eyes.

He hastily undoes his belt, pulling his zipper down and taking his leaking cock out of his boxers. It causes a sense of pride to swell up in his chest as she gasps at his size. He runs his hand along his shaft a few times, giving her an eye full before leaning over her.

He moves his tip through her sticky folds, bumping her clit a few times. Gently, he pushes the head of his dick inside her. “Lee, I don’t think you’ll fit.”

He grabs her cheeks, bringing her face close to his. “I’ll fuckin’ fit, baby.” 

Suddenly, he bottoms out inside her in one fluid thrust. He watches with a grin on his face as her brows contort to show her discomfort and her hips arch. She feels like heaven wrapped around him. He can feel the pulses that wrack the inside of her. He can feel her arousal covering his length. She’s so tight that he’s having a hard time holding still as he lets her catch her breath.

Her hands grip the front of his uniform as he slowly pulls out and thrusts back in again. Tears form as the sensations over take her. Leaning down, Lee bites along the skin of her chest, leaving behind his mark as she pushes her breasts harder against his face.

His hips start moving faster against her, sending her further up the seat as he pounds into her. Her moans get higher as he becomes rougher. His lips move to her neck and he gives it the same treatment as her tits. He wants her to leave this car with his teeth bruised into her skin, with his cum rolling down her legs, and a dull ache that nobody but him can soothe.

“Feel so good. You wanna cum on my cock? Huh? My sweet girl likes havin’ her pussy filled don’t she?”

“Yes. Please, so close,” she cries as she clings to him. 

Lee brings his hand down to where they’re connected. His thumb finds her clit once more as he fucks her. He rubs along the sensitive flesh, helping her reach her climax faster. He realizes that he’ll never get enough of this, never get enough of her. He knew his obsession wouldn’t end if he fucked her. She isn’t something he’ll ever get out of his system.

Her legs fall wider apart as her toes curl. That coil that’s in her stomach snaps and she’s cumming with a silent cry. Lee stops his movement so he can feel her clench around him. He curses under his breath as she squeezes him tightly. He can’t control himself anymore.

He starts to chase his high with her spent body. She lays limp as he thrusts inside her. He can feel that familiar heat creep up his spine. It burns so much hotter now that he’s buried balls deep in a pussy instead of his fist.

His stomach tightens as her silky cunt becomes too much. He cums with a growl and buries his face in her hair, breathing in her scent as he paints her insides with his spend. He lays on top of her, feeling her arms wrap around his waist. 

He rises and looks down at her. “You okay,” he asks. He didn’t want her to regret this, regret him.

She smiles as she says, “I’m perfect.”

Lee’s heart sores as he hears her admission. He kisses her and pulls out, already missing the warmth. He helps her sit up as she reaches for her clothes. She puts them back on her heated skin. His eyes never leave her. It’s like he wants to make sure he memorizes every little piece of her.

The weather cleared up significantly in the time the were wrapped in each other. “Alright, let’s get you home now, darlin’,” he says as he flashes a smirk her way. 

“Will I see you again? In this way I mean.”

“You mean, will we have sex again?”

Looking out of the corner of his eye as he shifts the cruiser in gear, he sees the little nod she gives him. She’s scared that this is a one time deal...his dumb baby. Still so oblivious to his true feelings.

“Of course,” he chuckles. “I’m never lettin’ you out of my sight, baby.”

[laurelier]

Wearing white: some thoughts on the subversion of purity and Christ-figure symbology in OFMD.

Specifically with regard to episode 3, but, like, it’s all over the (treasure) map. I finished this show for the first time, like, less than a week ago and I have actually not been able to think about or do anything else since so. Have this. 

I’ve seen a few real sharp metas floating around from some lovely people who have been on the ofmd beat since the beginning about a) the masterful and almost frighteningly detailed use of color symbolism in this show and b) the subversive use of Christian imagery in its visuals, and I wanted to submit a few (non-exhaustive, this is the tip of the tip of the iceberg) thoughts about white (and black, sort of) clothing to that general discourse, because it kind of. Is a thread that ties in with both tapestries. 

Under the cut— a few thoughts on when Stede wears white, when he wears black, and when Izzy accidentally channels Pontius Pilate, if pilate had taken, like. A more homoerotic and hands-on approach. I'd probably get kicked out of catholic school for this, unless it was one of those ones where they teach you how to throw knives.

Little tiny TW section before I begin: I don't get graphic in this post, I don't think, not any more than the show is, but I do mention the Concept Of Virginity a few times, so if discourse around that is in any way sensitive for you, just be aware. I tried to be gentle, but it's never a bad idea to warn.

Can’t touch this dadadadaaaa

Every color in this show is a multilayered symbol— red blue gold black purple green orange white, all of em, it’s fascinating and I am having a FIELD day thinking about how the visuals of this show use colors to suggest whole other worlds of meaning. And each color in turn represents lots of different things, but I do think that one important meaning of white, in OFMD, is the presence of emotional invulnerability. I think of it as a play on the Christian-canon virgin myth, in that when we think of white (in a Western, Christian symbolic tradition, ofc; I don't think the entire show operates from within that logical frame, but given Stede's background, I think you can certainly say he as a character is subject to it) we’re usually supposed to think of “virginal” purity, the idea of being Untouched and therefore Perfect, Holy, Godly, In Need of Protection, all that; I think the show/Stede kind of take that pervasive reductive tired idea and twist it around in a very cool way.

Opportune moment to reaffirm that I think the only good use of this Virgin Trope is when it’s turned on its head, as OFMD does— bc in the show, those characters who favor white in their clothes and, as such, create an association with this idea of being Virginal and Perfect appear to me not to be so much passively untouched as they are actively untouchable. And unlike in the traditional mythos, where virginity/“purity” (ack) is the ideal state (for women in particular), in OFMD, a show that’s so much about the deconstruction of rigid masculinities and, really, just rigid, isolated ways of being human— being unaccessed and untouchable is canonically not a desirable thing.

Stede’s the main one this applies to, I think (aside from Mary, at times, but the colors of her dresses are another post and a half). Stede’s a blue-coded character, @weirdgirlcore lays that out here, and that means so many things, but he also wears a lot of white— to start, we've got his white shirts, which are period costuming, sure, but. They’re also the closest layer of clothing to his skin, and he’s, like, always got them on, and there’s a good argument to be made that Stede is one of, if not the, most emotionally unavailable characters in the show. 

The scene where he's talking to the crew about talking things through, ironically enough. The shirt is so bright white and it's, like, right over his heart?

This isn't always applicable, and I think it moves around a bit, but I tend to think of these shirts as something of an insulating, protective layer: they’re almost always there, and they’re almost always white, and considered in the context of ep 3, I wonder if they, like. Serve the function of a bulletproof vest kind of deal. (Which makes it all the more interesting that Izzy shreds Stede’s shirt in the absolute horniest way possible in ep 2— maybe foreshadowing the way Ed will do the same to Stede, kind of break through his defenses, I don’t know; the way that even in his most vulnerable-looking states, such as in his pajamas and in his underclothes, Stede is still walled-off— but that’s a different barrel of fish.)

The cream of the Caribbean

Ruffly white undershirts/pjs aside, white color symbolism gets its moment to really shine in “The Gentleman Pirate”, when the crew visits the Republic of Pirates and Stede and Lucius wear those bright white outfits cringe. The bright ivory color, on the surface, evokes Stede’s, shall we say, inexperience with the world of piracy, his softness to that world and naïveté. Lucius, though, as well as the bloody, exhausted, sunburned hostage, also wear white— and no sooner does Lucius step off that boat than his brilliant, beautiful, pristine white coat is spoiled rather grotesquely by a man in an Unfortunate State who smears blood all down it. 

Grisly.

To this, all Stede can say is, “Really? You couldn’t have sidestepped?” which is a line that makes me gnash my teeth and pull my hair, because what else does Stede Bonnet do better in the first nine episodes of this show than sidestep everything that is represented by the symbology of the color red as expressed in this post by @edwardsilkheart— vulnerability, human emotion, real desire, Ed himself?

Even so early in the season, Lucius is already the direct opposite of Stede’s unavailability— he’s open, he’s vulnerable, he’s loving because of those things, he’s warming up to Stede— @weirdgirlcore again, hi, I’ve been reading your posts like my life mfing depends on it, this one explains this well, but the idea that Lucius is the red-coded emotional heart of the ship is just, yeah— so it makes sense that he’d be the one to be open enough to receive the ~redness of the pirate world and all the good and bad it’s got to offer. Stede, though, is so adept at keeping himself clear of all of that, even as he’s physically in the thick of it. The image of Stede walking entirely unscathed through the pirate world in his bright white little matching set is so evocative for me, like, a), you go girl, but b), you’d think those very, very white Virgin Mary ass clothes would make him more vulnerable to getting dirty or being singled out as a target, but they don’t, which makes me think there’s a way to read the moments when Stede wears white as when he’s at his most defensive, not least— and I think that’s such a cool reversal.

landed gentry lookin ass

When they get to Spanish Jackie’s, Lucius is again the one who gets blood thrown all over him, and walks around the rest of the time with that giant red stain all over his front. Hostage is looking rough too, but Stede remains perfectly spotless until he gets on the boat with the Spaniards and they stab him— and the red of his own blood soaks him, as opposed to Lucius, who’s sporting the blood of others. Stede has no contact with the color red at all, really, until moments before he’s lying in a pool of his own blood at Ed’s feet. 

And almost the literal next scene, like, that’s the final moments of ep 3, the “I’ve heard all about you” (knife me)— almost the literal next scene is Stede and Mary’s wedding. Like, that’s one of the opening scenes of ep 4, and Mary’s of course there in her white ass wedding dress, and we see her and Stede come into frame right after we see the lighthouse, I absolutely cannot stand this progression, it’s too smart.

I hate this shot. I hate it. Look at the lighthouse. Look at Stede in his stupid green cravat and Mary with her stupid green flowers. Look at the red on the officiant's neck tie thingy the nuns who taught me religion class in 6th grade would be so disappointed to know i don't remember the name of that shit but did it ABSOLUTELY have to be that bright red? Was that, like, an ecclesiastical necessity? God. GOD.

BECAUSE in order to get to this ^ scene, we have to go through Stede getting stabbed in his all-white fit at the end of ep 3 and his red blood spilling all over it: we have to watch him lying there in what is essentially his own white ass wedding dress, wearing blood for the first time (oh my GOD the implications) with Ed looming over him bathed in red light, wearing all black— like, they just got married. That’s what just happened. Symbolically they are wifed up and the suggestion is so heavy because of the close proximity of Stede’s actual legal wedding to Mary in the narrative and— all of that just underscores that now, Ed poses a big emotional threat to Stede. And having finished the show, we know that Stede, in the infinite depths of his self-hatred and subsequent capacity for cruelty to those he loves, will run from that. Will try to go back to being untouchable, before he really ever touched anyone; will try to go home and resume his former life, for a number of different reasons— a big one being that he believes he’s a ruiner, that he ruined Blackbeard, which calls up the way that, in a world that subscribes to the myth of virginity, virgins are considered “ruined” after certain intimate events unfold. Stede, the wearer of the supposed virginal color, believing himself a ruiner. I can’t believe this show, I honest to God cannot believe it.

But, of course, no matter how hard he tries, Stede can’t go back to being untouchable anymore, from that moment on the Spanish boat he loses his rather uncanny ability to stay completely lily-white— he’s found something that affects him, can break through his armor of, like, snow-white emotional blankness, and that could be so good for him if he could just let it. 

Jesus christ superstar but make it goth

One last final, kind of different note, because I was planning to write here about black and what I think that means but as I was writing I found that I don’t think I really know, lmao— but I do think it’s important that Stede is wearing black when Izzy stabs him against the mast in ep 6. Because, like. That’s, a) of all, such a deranged crucifixion nod. Stede??? As a Christ figure? Nailed to a pirate mast after a homoerotic swordfight that’s also a stand-in for, like, the romantic competition between Izzy and himself for Ed? Are you joking? 

Like— come again. Stede???!? As Jesus? It’s so good. It’s SO good. Stede isn’t Jesus! But he is. He is! Like, the best part is that Stede being Jesus here makes sense: he just forgave Ed, no questions asked, for attempting to murder him and right after that, he’s like, dying, and then oop he’s alive nvm what!— and all the while the whole thing is so gay, and his knowlege of how to survive the stabbing ordeal is rooted in such a gay moment, and he’s nailed to that fucking cross mast— and he could easily have killed Izzy afer he threw the gunpowder in his face, and even Olu was telling him to stab him but he didn’t, he showed Izzy mercy— and then Izzy’s sword breaks off in his guts and Stede is there stapled to that blessed mast metaphorically absolving everybody’s sins, most notably Ed’s, and there’s not a damned thing Izzy can do about it. 

The lighting in the scene where Iz actually stabs Stede is so dark that I couldn't get a good screenshot so here just have this pic of S in his little sweater with his little blue ring.

And b) of all, he’s wearing black while all of this happens, an uncharacteristic color for him, and which is also the color of Ed’s clothes: black likens Stede to Ed, in this moment (as well as Izzy). The last time Stede wore black, he was in Ed’s actual outfit, and he felt the burden of the real, dangerous, immediate responsibility that Ed bears. Stede’s adoption of the color black here from head to toe is such a cool choice on the part of the show in part because much, much more often, like, almost always, white is associated with Christ figures, as it is with virgins. But Stede-as-Jesus is wearing black— mourning, death, night; black being, maybe, the color associated with the times in our lives when we really have to, as Stede says, “face the music”, face the depths of ourselves.

Get crucified bitch.

Like I said, I don’t know what I think about symbolism of black, but. I do think if Stede were wearing white here, as he was the first time he got stabbed, I think that would kind of put a symbolic edge of unreality over the scene— the way he's used white to fabricate things, create an escapist reality around himself that insulates him from what’s really going on, as he does in the Republic of Pirates. The fact that he’s wearing black, to me, suggests him grappling with the weight of his situation, with his proximity to both death and love/Ed, with the responsibilities of captainship, and maybe most importantly, with the very, very real emotional honesty that Ed gives him to hold in this episode, directly before this scene.

Every time I rewatch this show I am struck anew at the sheer depth of the attention to detail in the script and costuming and lighting and set design and just. In everything. I don’t know how people make things that are so good, but I am thanking all the Jesuses I personally am aware of that this exists, long live.