#i may go inactive for years at a time but I will always love Transformers

[spaceybot]

God, I loved Transformers One…to see pre-war Cybertron animated on screen in 2024 but daydreaming about it as a child playing with toys since 2006-2007…wild…

[mistylune]

Hello! So I decided for my first formal post, I wanted to start off with an intro to how I got into the shifting/manifesting community, and what I’ve learned from the many years I’ve been active in these communities. I may expand on some of these in the future, but for now, I’ll keep it brief. So, with that being said…

How I got my start:

My first brush with manifesting/shifting started during the pandemic, when I stumbled upon the subliminal community. Back then, I had no clue about manifesting or what it was. I thought subliminals were just magic audios that transformed people in thin air (as ridiculous as it sounds).

Back then, I was trying to lose weight, and found an audio in YouTube during my search for workout videos. This era is what I consider to be the point in time where I was heavily misguided and filled with misinformation about subliminals and how they worked, as well as many limiting beliefs that caused me to become very conflicted. For example, when I first entered the community, I was told that I needed to drink water to get results. I was also told I needed to stay positive all the time, or otherwise my results wouldn’t come. Though I doubt any of the people who told me these things were being malicious, or had bad intent, these beliefs did a lot of harm to my journey, as I didn’t realize that I had been so misguided. Rather than realizing my own power, or learning how subliminals actually worked, I constantly doubted myself, and worried that I wasn’t listening enough, or that I had somehow sabotaged myself by thinking a negative thought.

Similarly, I stumbled upon the shifting community through subliminals. After researching more about it, I was invested. The idea of being able to live within the shows and movies I loved so much immediately caught my interest, and I was hooked. However, once again while in this community, I was pumped with misinformation and limiting beliefs, and I constantly questioned if I was doing things right, looking to others for help, always looking for posts on success stories to see what I was doing wrong. Also, if you were in the shifting community around the pandemic, you probably saw, or even heard of the infamous Odd1sOut video. When I saw it, I became even more demotivated, mostly because I now was doubting my own sanity, and if I was crazy for believing in shifting. Eventually though, I bounced back, and continued with my journey. Like many shifters out there, I tried every method in the book, only to be disappointed in the end. I quickly got desperate, which only led to me exhausting myself. And shifting started to be less fun.

It was less than a year later that I finally learned what “manifesting” was, or at least clarified how it worked. And I did all the methods. But when they didn’t work for me, I quickly got demotivated and gave up, going back to using subliminals and hoping for the best. Eventually, I started to be inactive for some time in both communities. I took a break from shifting, and subliminals, and the communities I was in as well, and started focusing on other things.

And finally, coming to the tumblr community. Coming here, I finally was able to understand and deconstruct the limiting beliefs and misinformation I was taught when I first started. I took me a bit to finally be able to change my mindset, but I was finally able to learn from my own experiences and mistakes. It also completely changed my view on things. I started to worry less, and my self image changed drastically. I feel I learned more here (at least in terms of things that actually helped me) than I did through other communities. I listened to Edward art, and read posts from other bloggers, and what they said resonated with me, and thus my excitement towards manifesting and shifting was reinstated.

Now that I’ve given a summary of my journey, here are some things that I have learned over the years, and wish I had known before:

Subliminals are tools and methods:

I remember one thing that I was told that stuck with me was by a person on YouTube. They said that “not every subliminal works for everyone” comparing them to skincare products. Now that I understand manifesting a lot better, this sentence did not make sense to me. Why wouldn’t every subliminal work for everyone? It’s like saying that not every affirmation works for everyone. Subliminals are just as much a method/tool as scripting or the 7x7 method. Telling people that not every subliminal will work for them will only send people on a wild goose chase to find one that will, when in reality, its a pointless endeavor, because the power does not lie within the subliminal, but within you. The subliminal does not matter, because in the end it is just a tool to assist you with manifesting and/ or shifting.

Manifesting and Shifting are the same:

I feel like most people here know this one already, so I feel like I’m stating the obvious. But for a really long time, I treated them like they were two separate things. Once I came to terms with this idea, it became much easier for me to come to terms with manifesting and shifting. It’s all about fulfilling your desired state. Whether it's having brown eyes, or being a student at U.A high. All of this is achievable through the same methods. I wish I had known this before, as it would have made both of my journeys much easier.

There is no “key” to manifesting or shifting:

What I mean by this is, not everyone’s key will be yours. I think overall, what matters most to manifesting is finding what resonates with you. What fulfills your inner belief? What makes manifesting fun and enjoyable for you? Some people like writing everyday, while others prefer letting audios play in the background while they do something else. For me, I like both. Not everyone’s method will work for everyone. And while I am fully aware I just finished saying that there is no such thing as a subliminal that won’t work for everyone, what I mean by this point is that manifesting and shifting should never feel forced or uncomfortable. The best way in my opinion to manifest is with a way that you enjoy, and that allows you to tap into your desired state.

Build you own beliefs:

This is very, very important. Because for many years I allowed others to tell me what I needed to do, and believe in order to manifest and shift. But no one ever told me (until I joined the tumblr community) how important it is to build your own. If the beliefs you have now aren’t working for you, change them. Create new ones until you find which ones make manifesting/shifting the most comfortable and easy for you. And if you do wish to listen to others beliefs, choose ones that make you feel better about your journey, and that resonate within your heart. Once I started doing this, I saw results much faster, and became more comfortable in my mind.

Let yourself be human:

I am aware of how powerful I am. And you should be too. But that doesn’t mean that you shouldn't ever let yourself feel what you feel. We are humans, not robots. We are happy sometimes, and sad other times. We manifest in spite of hard circumstances, but accept the fact that sometimes, we can’t always be super positive and happy because things can get tough. I know that all too well because when I first started my journey, I was in a really bad place. One thing that always really bothered me was how some people in this community (like on Amino and Youtube for example) would push this idea of positivity that I found often to be toxic. It’s important to understand that just because you feel down one day, it doesn’t mean that suddenly your manifestations will halt. You have them already, and they can’t be taken from you, especially not by your own feelings. When I feel down, I allow myself to retreat to my imagination, relaxing in knowing that things would get better, and that I can allow myself time to feel what I feel, positive or not.

____

Thank you for reading! And like I said before, if what I said doesn’t resonate with you, don't take it to heart. This is just how I interpreted the things that I have learned, and my own opinions and beliefs. They aren’t meant to be taken with the utmost seriousness. With that being said, thanks for stopping by, and I’ll see you in my next post!

With love,

Lune

[skold]

alright time to roast chris’s astrological chart

let’s fuckin go

read more for length

sun in libra - your sun sign is basically your outward personality. ur sense of self. libra suns value fairness and balance and harmony over most other things. tend to put a lot of thought into the things they do. sincere, honest, decent. intolerant of general asshole behavior and those who treat others like shit. a STRONG sense of aesthetic and artistry, prone to becoming artists of some sort.

moon in aries - moon is more yr internal self. a lot of folks relate more to their moon sign bc it’s how we feel about ourselves. aries moons can be hotheaded and impulsive. they rush through things and hate uncertainty. can give off just really intense energy in general, but most fire moons do.

mercury in scorpio - mercury rules communication and interpersonal interaction and oooooh lord does scorpio in mercury want revenge. they’re emotional and unstable in their communication. tend to like art and mysticism and psychology. can see right the fuck through people. you cannot bullshit a scorpio mercury. 

venus in scorpio - venus is basically yr love language planet. rules love and sex and also generally what you find pleasurable in life. venus in scorpio people have intense sexual energy and are generally expressive of their sexuality. they’re often the “impossible to resist” type. they love desperately and deeply. good at getting others to do what they want. have a deep sense for other folks emotions and desires.

mars in aquarius - mars is the planet of action. it’s about energy and drive - any kind of drive, be it sex drive or ambition or goal setting or work ethic. mars in aquarius folks want to be fuckin weirdos. they’re the type of people who stand out both in appearance and their energy. care a lot about enacting societal change and fighting some sort of “system”, be it society or a repressive family or certain stereotypes.

jupiter in pisces - jupiter is about growth and expansion. how we self actualize. it’s also sometimes associated with luck and fortune. jupiter in pisces natives are super friendly. hospitable and charitable types. want to look after other people. super sensitive and intuitive. good at “reading the room” so to say. often distrustful and suspicious of the motivations of others.

saturn in sagittarius - big daddy saturn is an asshole. rules over restriction and order and also ones growth over time. saturn will hurt your feelings to teach you a goddamn lesson if you fuck around. these people tend to reject organized religion and form their own set of morals. they worry about problems too much to the point of inaction. they lack the sort of trust that others love and care for and value them, and will basically always go through life feeling unsupported and like they can only rely on themselves.

uranus in sagittarius - uranus is such a slow planet to orbit it doesn’t move sign alignments very often and remains in the same sign for years and influences an entire generation. rules individuality and revolution. uranus in sag folks crave progress and accomplishment. they see others as equals and fight against xenophobia and general bigotry. generally optimistic.

neptune in capricorn - neptune is also a super slow planet so it influences an entire generation. it rules spirituality and fantasy/imagination. this placement often means a strong determination to meet goals and they have a desire for perfection.

pluto in scorpio - the slowest of planets and the ruler of power and transformation. if you’re reading this you likely have this placement!! most millennials do. these natives have the ability to reinvent themselves. prolific and capable. often into the occult. use their sexuality as a source of personal power.

so that’s the planets, now here’s some other astrological points

north node in aries, south node in libra - the nodes are mathematical points opposite each other in the chart. south node indicates your comfort zone and north node indicates what somebody wants out of life and has to go out of said comfort zone for. these folks have a lot of internal conflict. they have trouble balancing things in their life and have basically zero concept of moderation. tend to bend over backwards for others and suck at setting boundaries.

lilith in gemini - lilith is a fictional point opposite the actual moon. in mythology, lilith refused to submit to adam, rejected the world of adam & eve and decided to go chill with satan instead. and if you ask me lilith did nothing wrong, but that’s a whole other post. lilith in gemini folks are constantly searching for their sense of self. they’re constantly changing and can feel like they don’t know themselves. they do not take things seriously because they feel other things and people can change as easily as they can, which is fundamentally untrue, but difficult for them to understand. make friends easily and like to meet people from other places. ymmv but some folks believe lilith placement can indicate what health issues someone may have, and gemini lilith people are believed to be particularly vulnerable to respiratory infections and injuries to the arms/hands.

chiron in gemini - chiron is an asteroid btwn saturn and uranus. in mythology, chiron was an immortal centaur who was a healer and a teacher. he was injured by a poisonous arrow by heracles and it should have killed him but due to his immortality, he was suffering in excruciating pain but couldn’t die. he gave his immortality for prometheus and upon being sent to the underworld, zeus showed mercy on him and raised him up into the heavens as a celestial body. chiron symbolizes unhealable trauma but can also indicate how one can accept their suffering and move forward. these people feel that they are constantly being misunderstood. they either feel that nobody listens to them, or that people misunderstand what they meant, or even that no one wants to understand them. but the more a chiron in gemini placement tries to correct this misunderstanding, the more it may hurt them.

now here’s some of his aspects, which is just how certain planets align in the chart and interact with each other. there’s gonna be specific astrology words here that i simply do not have the brain to explain right now, but it’s not important really, just there for the folks who do know astrology and want to know what some of his aspects are. i’m not going to include all of them cuz that’d take forever but here’s some notable ones

sun opposite moon - emotions and feelings of the moon are the opposites of the ego and individuality of the sun. this can occasionally cause conflicts, especially in relationships between close family members - parents and children or with significant others.

sun sextile uranus - brings conventionality and independence. creative dynamics and independent creativity. they like to work on projects that benefit their society. idealistic, progressive, intuitive, original. they have the need to be different and they want to show their uniqueness. 

moon trine uranus - need for considerable emotional independence and freedom. often lead unconventional lives and they do not like to yield to the will of others. feel separated from society. often experience stormy emotions and mood swings.

mercury conjunction uranus - good manners and mental balance. can express themselves well and are convincing. their views are also well balanced. their thinking is often so rational that they are not able to express their feelings too openly. 

mars sextile saturn - can work without getting tired. careful and consistent. excellent organizational skills. they like stability and security, and they do not like to take risks. can easily deal with challenges and obstacles.

mars square pluto - this aspect is challenging because these people are stubborn and determined, so they often hurt other people´s feelings with their sharp judgment and their decisiveness can often lead to big life changes

and anyway chris continues to be the person most loudly Their Chart out of all the folks whom i have ever read their charts.

[927roses-and-stuff]

Miracles in Gotham Chapter 5: Tales of the Misguided Serpent

I really am sorry it's taking more than five chapters for them to actually get to Gotham, by the way. I know most fics will usually have them there by the first chapter. I just like having a lot of build up for the plot and future subplots, so please bear with me!TW: Explicit minor character death and violence in war. Mentions of PTSD, depression, anxiety, and self-harm. 

Hey guys! Thank you so much for reading this story and (hopefully) enjoying it so far! I realize I don’t say it enough, but I truly appreciate everyone who took the time to read this fic, and knowing that there are people who enjoy it are part of my inspiration to write more. As always, an extra thank you to @ozmav for the AU, and @mystery-5-5 for helping me through the writing process (and dealing with my rants).

There will be mentions and allusions to real life events and locations associated with World War II. I don’t mean any disrespect, and any character mentioned and associated within the story is purely fictional. This is not meant to be an accurate depiction of WWII or war in general, nor is it meant to be a mockery of what actually happened. There will also be brief mentions of PTSD, depression, and anxiety symptoms and self-harm. These are all based on research from sources that my therapist has given me (i.e. Centre for Clinical Interventions) and my own personal experiences. 

Lastly, Alfred is in his mid-teens here (because he would fake his age to get into the army) and he isn’t the all wise and knowing Alfred Pennyworth we know and love just yet. And we all know how Master Fu loves giving Miraculous to unqualified, unprepared owners XD. 

P.S. Not me making Sass oblivious to human stuff because I don’t know a lot of war stuff. 

If you want to see more, follow: #miraclesingotham or ask to be added to the tag list.

Tag list: : @northernbluetongue @zerotosiki @spicybelladonna @my-name-is-michell @legendaryneckjudgestudent @lokiifriggasonn

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“Tell me everything you know about this Alfred Pennyworth and your time with him, Sass. I need to know if he can help before considering everything.” 

The snake kwami merely nodded. “Of course, my Guardian.”

“Alfred Pennyworth was one of the best snakelets I have ever known, even if in the end, he did not believe so. If given the time, perhaps, he could have mastered the Snake Miraculous in all of its power, despite his young age. I think he would’ve been only a year or two older than yourself...” 

August 1943, Northwest Europe

“Alfred Pennyworth, I am Sass, kwami of the Snake Miraculous, of Intuition. I will grant you the powers of Second Chance, so long as you promise to use your powers for good.” 

The snake kwami held out his hands gracefully as he finished introducing himself to his new owner. The current Guardian had told him of his duties before he was handed to the young man in front of  him. In times of war, a little intuition could go a long way. 

As Alfred continued to remain unresponsive, Sass began to worry. Alfred Pennyworth was a young man with sharp eyebrows and dark, piercing eyes dressed in a camouflage dark-green military uniform complete with the green beret covering his scalp . Sass noticed the tiny tremors of his shoulders and his tightly pressed lips,  although it would be unnoticeable to the untrained eye. They were in a dimly lit room, although it was strangely quiet for times of war, as the Guardian had relayed to him. 

It had been perhaps the strangest experience that Sass had encountered with a human, although he didn’t have that many to rely on. The young man continued to stare at Sass, and in all his infinite patience, Sass floated in place, and entered a meditative pose above the box he had just come out of.  From the little he knew of humans, they were often slow, narrow-minded creatures who needed more patience than most kwamis were willing to give. 

However, despite the strangeness of it all, Sass felt a warm kinship with the still man in front of him. 

Sass was unsure of how long it had taken for Alfred to be shaken out of his stupor, but he soon closed the box carefully and addressed him. 

“Hello. You’re the friend Mr. Fu told me of?” He asked hesitantly. 

“Yesss,” Sass nodded. “Master Fu is the current Guardian of the Miraculous. You must be someone special for him to entrust you with me, and me with you.” 

Alfred nodded slightly. “Yes, he mentioned that you would help me in my times of need.” 

“That is correct.” 

Sass watched as the young man bit his lip in thought and lightly traced over the marks on the box. “Sass, was it?” 

“Yesss.” 

“...I am Alfred Pennyworth.” 

“I am aware.” 

He looked up from the box and lightly cupped Sass in his hands. Alfred’s eyes squinted at him, his eyes roaming over his tiny form suspiciously. Sass stayed still for him, not feeling uncomfortable at the human’s scrutiny. Humans were suspicious of the unknown, Sass decided. They were wary even when there was evidence to say otherwise. 

When Alfred seemed satisfied, he spoke again. “Why would Mr. Fu give me a tiny snake?” 

Sass frowned. “I may be tiny, human, but I am powerful. With the bracelet you hold in that box, you will be able to turn back time for an unlimited amount of times within an allotted 5 minutes after the first reset. With my help, you are able to directly change events around you as they happen, for as much as you wish.” 

The young man’s eyes widened and gulped; Sass was unable to determine if it was out of terror or fascination. 

“Why would he entrust me with such a power?” 

“The Guardian’s mind works in mysterious ways. Perhaps, he wanted to give you a chance to see in yourself, what he saw in you.” 

His breath hitched, and he gulped again. “And what if I don’t like what I see?” 

Sass floated upwards to meet Alfred’s eyes. Yellow eyes met dark brown as he spoke. “That will all depend on you.” 

For the next few months, Sass watched as Alfred Pennyworth trained with his fellow soldiers as part of the Achnacarry in Scotland and eventually recruited to the No. 47 (Royal Marine) Commando based in Dorchester once the new year came. It had been the longest that Sass had interacted with any of his holders. He took to hiding in the pockets of Alfred’s uniform, although he often wished he had another place to hide when Alfred and the other humans were training with ringing, deafening gunshots,  the thundering footsteps of a hundred men caused tremors within the soil, and the hoarse shouts and screams of soldiers in a stimulated battlefield. When the soldiers were off-duty, Sass liked the chatter as Alfred and the others conversed with one another, their different tones whether morose or jovial, since it helped him drift off to sleep in Alfred’s warm pocket. 

In what little downtime that they had, Alfred liked to ask Sass questions about the Miraculous, what they did, their purpose in the world, the limits of his own Miraculous, and always, why he was chosen to bear such a great responsibility. Sass always told him what he could (although being inactive for so long left him little knowledge of other holders), and always repeated what he had told Alfred the first day they met. Sass liked being with Alfred. He was intelligent, curious, logical, and sensitive to information. Despite the grim circumstances that surrounded their partnership, he was glad that Master Fu had chosen Alfred Pennyworth.

It had been nearly a year since Sass and Alfred met when the No. 47 Commando received their first operation on June 6, 1944. Alfred often told him stories at night of his family, his home, and his surroundings. The night before as they were preparing for battle, Alfred had shared his worries with his fellow soldiers and Sass. It would be the first time they would be in a real battle, outside of Achnacarry or Dorchester. As the Commando arrived at the battlefield the day after, all the soldiers were crammed onto a ship. It had only taken a few hours to arrive at the outskirts of where they needed to be. Only a few miles from the shore, and already the sounds of battle rang throughout the ships, and the soldiers prepared to join in. Some would join as soon as the ship hit shore while others would stay behind to make sure that their ship didn’t sink and attack the opposing army from the water. Alfred was one of the soldiers that would be fighting the moment they hit shore, so he made sure to find an empty space to transform. Sass found himself and Alfred cramped near the ship’s engine, where Alfred was already fiddling with the Snake Miraculous. 

“I won’t look like a circus act when I transform, will I, Sass?” 

Sass shook his head. “No. Make sure to imagine yourself as you are, and the Miraculous will conform to your desires. You might find that your clothes will feel scaly as a side effect. Either way, your clothes will protect you from most impacts, although I’m not sure about bullets.” 

Alfred smiled. “I see. Will I be able to talk to you when I’m transformed?” 

“No.”  Alfred’s eyes widened. “Fear not. I will still be with you, as a part of you, but we will not be able to interact as we are now nor will I be conscious when you are transformed.”

Alfred took a shaky breath. “Alright. Thank you, Sass. Anything else I need to know?” 

“Use it wisely. Seeing that many possibilities will take a toll on you. You will most likely witness one moment in time in different ways. Others may not remember the other timelines, but you will. Do not forget that.” 

Alfred gave a curt nod. “This is it, then?” 

“Yessss, I wish you luck, Alfred.” 

“As do I,” he chuckled. “Sass, scales slither.” 

As Alfred called out the last words, Sass faded into unconsciousness. He had faith in Alfred, and hoped he would work well with the Snake. 

______________________________________________________________________________

When Alfred de-transformed, Sass noticed the light in his eyes and the way he clutched tightly onto two soldiers a few years older than him. The battle was over for now, Sass mused, so Alfred must be relieved that he was safe and alive. Later in the safety of his barrack, Alfred recounted the battle in hushed whispers, how many times he went back to save just one more life (“To think, who might’ve remained dead if you were not with me,” he said, rubbing Sass’ head affectionately with his finger), or to take one more shot he missed the first time. Sass asked him the precise number of times that he went back in time during those allotted 5 minutes that he had used “Second Chance.” Sass asked him who he had saved, how, and whose lives were lost in return. Alfred answers both questions enthusiastically with a significant amount of detail, that Sass allowed himself to feel content. Alfred had saved lives, had done his part for his country.

Sass was proud of his snakelet. 

As time went on, battles were waged and the war raged on all over Europe. Sass didn’t understand human battles, but he made sure to stay by Alfred’s side for all of it. 

It was about half a year in that Sass noticed the changes that Alfred is going through. Like every soldier, he is marred with scars, had a more gaunt, more sickly frame that came from eating smaller rations and sleeping less, and dark circles under his eyes that emphasized how haunted he was. Yet, Sass noticed that Alfred was overextending himself. In every offense, Alfred volunteered to be in the frontlines. In every battle, he took the time to transform, which meant Sass was also often exhausted after every battle and struggled to eat the already miniscule portions Alfred spared from his rations. After every battle, Alfred was jumpy, going from soldier to soldier and striking up conversation whenever he could, visiting the infirmary and muttering apologies to the wounded soldiers. It took Sass a while to realize that the former had been people he had saved, and the latter were the people that he couldn’t or those that he almost hadn’t.

Nights were always the worst. In the daytime with the rush and hustle of war battles, there was not a lot of time for Alfred to do anything but act and fight, especially when he transformed with Sass. But at night, when there was a semblance of silence in his own corner of the barracks, Sass comforted Alfred through the tears, the nightmares, the bloodshed, and other horrors he witnessed. When Sass couldn’t comfort him, Alfred retreated to the arms of Leo Dupain, a soldier a few years older who knew of Alfred’s real age, and the person who Alfred recounted saving the most during his resets. He had sandy brown hair, olive green eyes, a square-like jaw with a hooked nose that looked like it had been broken at least once. Sass listened to their hushed promises of returning to the motherland and settling down somewhere in the countryside far away from the influences of war and its politics. Sass watched as both Alfred and Leo drifted to sleep, holding each other like they were each other’s only anchor to the physical realm. Sass watched as Alfred woke a half hour before the crack of dawn to visit the infirmary before beginning his training, never looking back. Each time, Sass noticed that Leo searched for warmth that had previously been there.

Sass knew that witnessing all of Time’s possibilities was a heavy burden for anyone, much less a child. Alfred related to him about comrades who had died from gunshots, from being trampled on, or thrown overboard. If not them, it was the patients in the infirmary, the ones who had fallen trap to insanity or those who had lost a part of their physical bodies forever. Alfred was inconsolable. By December of 1944, Alfred had anxiety, insomnia, and an unhealthy attachment to the Snake Miraculous.

During that time, Sass tried to teach Alfred how to be more responsible with the Snake’s power, how to use each return more efficiently, and especially, how Alfred didn’t need to use the Miraculous for every injury that his comrades endured. Sass had relayed stories of other Miraculous heros: Heracles, Hippolyta, Joan of Arc, others unrecorded in history who had struggled to learn the same lesson: that Alfred was not a god and he couldn’t save everyone. 

But war was brutal and without mercy, especially to those with kind hearts.

Everything came to a head when Alfred failed to save Leo Dupain before he could reset. Sass was thrown onto the ground as the transformation wore off, gunshots blazing in the background as Alfred’s screams pierced his tiny ears. Sass slowly shuffled to Alfred’s side, and climbed into a nearby pocket.

“Leo, Leo!” Alfred cried, grabbing the heavy body of Leo Dupain, whose leg had been blown off by a nearby explosive. Blood spilled forth from the wound, and Leo breathed in shallow gasps, as his body became limp. Alfred was soon covered in his blood and from the dust and dirt around them. Frantically, he tried to find spare cloth but was futile in his efforts. Sass could feel the tremors from Alfred’s body as he held onto Leo Dupain like a lifeline. Other soldiers had heard his cries and clambered to them, grabbing Alfred forcefully out of Leo’s arms and into safety,

“He needs me! Stop! I need to save him!”

“Leg’s been blasted off, can’t do much for ‘im now but fight,” a soldier- Gabriel Ackles- muttered. He had been one of the soldiers Alfred saved a week earlier from a headshot.

“It wasn’t supposed to be like this,” Alfred ranted hysterically. “I was supposed to save him; he wasn’t supposed to get hurt. He’s going to die…”

SLAP

Alfred stood stunned as Gabriel stood before him, red-faced and fuming.

“We are in battle, soldier! Get it together! You wanna help Dupain, Pennyworth?!” Gabriel didn’t wait for an answer before shoving a long gun of sorts into Alred’s hands. “You go out there and drag every Nazi motherfucker to hell or die trying! You got it, soldier?!” 

Sass watched as Alfred’s eyes dimmed into a stormy grey and stared at the gun in his hands. A second passed and with trembling hands, Alfred was marching back onto the battlefield, gun ablaze. Sass tried hard as he could to use whatever remaining energy he had to protect Alfred, but the amount of resets during Alfred’s transformation had exhausted him and he fell unconscious to the sounds of war.

When Sass regained consciousness, it was to Master Fu’s face. A chill ran down his spine as he fluttered around frantically searching for Alfred. They were in an empty room that only had a few books, two futons and the Miracle Box. There were two double doors that separated their room from the outside world and another, smaller door that led to the rest of the building. 

Where were they? Why was he here? More importantly, where was Alfred?

“Do not bother, Sass,” Master Fu said in a tone more morose than he had ever heard. “Mr. Pennyworth has returned you to me. It has been several months since you were inactive.”

Sass deflated and floated down to the ground beneath him. “Where is he now, Master?”

“I am unsure.” Master Fu looked out of the large double doors. “I am afraid that I have placed too many expectations on young Alfred. When he helped us escape London, I had given you to him as a token of gratitude and friendship.”

“Master?”

Master Fu sighed and turned back to look at Sass with teary eyes. “I could not have foreseen that I had cursed more than blessed him, Sass. He had refused to give you back at first, and it was only yesterday, a month since I last saw him, that you had returned to us.”

Sass couldn’t speak. He had really liked Alfred Pennyworth. He was a good man- one of the best. But, even he couldn’t deny the madness he had endured during his time as one of his snakelets. If kwami had hearts, Sass knew it would be obliterated by the news.

“I see, Master,” was all Sass said before Master Fu renounced him and his Miraculous.

Present day

“And that was the last I heard of Alfred Pennyworth. The next time I appeared in this realm, it was to Luka Couffaine.”

Marinette wiped away a few tears that had sprung up during Sass’ story.

“Do you think he would have anything to do with the Miraculous after all he’d been through, Sass?”

Sass bowed his head and closed his eyes. “Perhaps. He had many questions I could not answer. I am not sure if his trauma overrode his curiosity. I know he had been planning on studying the Miraculous more before Leo Dupain had died.”

Marinette played with her hands as she mulled over Sass’ response. Something about his story caught her attention.

“Leo Dupain? As in my granduncle, Leo Dupain?” 

Sass blinked, yellow eyes trained on her. “Perhaps.” 

“If they're the same person, then he’s still around,” Marinette mused, thinking of the one-legged elder from her early childhood that made her laugh with his silly jokes and warm cuddles. “I never really kept up with him since my grandfather kept us away from Papa’s side of the family. He was funny, though.”

Marinette entered a silent trance, going over all the new information she had received so far, while the kwamis waited with bated breaths. Alfred Pennyworth had deeper ties with her than she had previously thought. In another world, he would’ve been another distant granduncle. However, would she risk going to him in this world when the Miraculous had already scarred him so deeply? But what if he didn’t know about her granduncle? What if he spurned her away despite that? What if he didn’t? What had Master Fu seen in Alfred Pennyworth that he had practically given away one of the Miraculous to his care? How would she explain everything that had happened since their last argument?

What other choices did Marinette really have?

“Marinette?” Tikki asked, the only kwami comfortable enough to break her train of thought.

She sighed, not liking her decision one bit, but she was desperate, and in some ways, this would be beneficial for both Alfred Pennyworth and her.

“Looks like we’re going to Gotham City.”

______________________________________________________________

I really am sorry it's taking more than five chapters for them to actually get to Gotham, by the way. I know most fics will usually have them there by the first chapter. I just like having a lot of build up for the plot and future subplots, so please bear with me!

[warrioreowynofrohan]

The Leithian Reread - Canto VI (Beren in Nargothrond)

While The Leithian-related plot of this canto focuses on Beren in Nargothrond, almost the first half of it is a brief summary of the Silmarillion from Return of the Noldor through to the Dagor Bragollach. Which I love, since those events for the most part aren’t coverered in Tolkien’s other poetic works, and I prefer the poetry structure of the Leithian to Tolkien’s other (non-rhyming, more Rohirric-sounding) pieces of epic poetry.

This is a good place to note, for readers who are new to the poetic Leithian, that some names are different from the Silm (Tolkien started a revised version with Silm-consistent names, but he didn’t get very far with it). The Noldor are referred to as the Gnomes - a rough transliteration of their elvish name into a human language, drawing from the Greek for ‘knowledge’. Tolkien later rejected this on the basis that the word was already too associated with entirely different mental images, but given how transformative his use of ‘elves’ was (typical fantasy elves are now almost all inspired by his ideas of tall, beautiful, long-lived immortals), we might have completely different concepts of ‘gnome’ now if he’s gone ahead with it. 

The second big diiference is that Finrod is referred to exclusively as Felagund - his Dwarven honorific - whereas his father Finarfin is referred to as Finrod. Tolkien had a lot of difficulty with Finarfin’s name and it went through a pile of different iterations. There are also other minor differences, like Finwë being referred to as Finn.

Returning to the poem - it’s hard to pick a favourite part of the summary section; I love so much of it. This is the closest I’m ever going to get to the Noldolantë (Tolkien wrote a couple pages of another poem focusing on the Return of the Noldor, but I don’t like it as much).

The mists were mantled round the towers

of the Elves’ white city by the sea.

There countless torches fitfully

did start and twinkle, as the Gnomes

were gathered to their fading homes

and thronged the wide and winding stair

that led to the wide echoing square.

There Fëanor mourned his jewels divine,

the Silmarils he made. Like wine

his wild and potent words them fill;

a great host hearkens deathly still.

But all he said both wild and wise

half truth and half the fruit of lies

that Morgoth sowed in Valinor

in other songs and other lore

recorded is.

There’s such a wonderful sense of place and of mood in those lines; the Return of the Noldor has always been one of the most compelling parts of the Silmarillion for me. In the same way that Elves have a different sense of time than Men, Valar must have a different sense of it than Elves; they’re acting, but within their own sense of time, and for the Noldor, in the wake of the Darkening, the desire to do something rather than wait around for the Valar (who are looking more deeply fallible than they ever have before) to fix things must be extremely powerful. And Fëanor’s presence and words and fury, brought into that environment, is like fire to oil. To be active and purposeful in the face of disaster, rather than passive and directionless - that’s a powerful force. The poem also acknowledges that Fëanor’s not entirely wrong (“half truth and half the fruit of lies”), however deeply distorted his ideas about both the Valar and the Secondborn are. As I’ve said before, I think that Eru intended for the Elves to be in Middle-earth, not Valinor; the entire Leithian is centred around the value and importance of an elf-human relationship that continues to affect the history of Arda down through the Third Age (and, in its symbolic meaning, even further).

There’s also a line about the Oath: Who calls these names in witness may not break his oath, though earth and heaven shake. The texts on the Oath are somewhat contradictory on its breakability, though they are united on its importance and severity (it is decidedly not just words, or something that can be casually laid aside). The Silmarillion says “so sworn, good or evil, an oath may not be broken, and it shall pursue oathkeeper and oathbreaker to the world’s end”. But that contradicts itself - it it can’t be broken, then there can’t be oathbreakers. Maedhros and Maglor’s final conversation at the end of the Silm is more illuminating to me: it’s not a matter of the Oath being physically or psychologically impossible to break (if it was, how did they go the 400 years of the Siege of Angband without actively attacking Morgoth?), but of fearing the fate they have called down upon themselves (the Everlasting Darkness) if they do break it. (Plus a lot of sunk cost fallacy, by that point.) Which is considerably less sympathetic: murdering innocent people in order to avoid the consequences of your own bad decision is, ultimately, the choice that innocents should bear the cost of your own choices, which is ultimately a form of cowardice. (Not to mention the inherently contradictory nature of saying “I’m going to do evil so that I won’t be damned,” which Maglor eventually realizes.)

(More of my thoughts on the Oath here.)

This is also one of the few texts we have that actually states the Oath (or rather, part of it; the invocations are not included) rather that describing it. I think all the ones we have are in Tolkien’s poetry; there’s no prose version.

The Kinslaying is not mentioned in this Canto; that’s saved for the Duel of Felagund and Sauron in the next one. But this canto does include possibly the only poetic rendition we get of Fingon rescuing Maedhros from Thangorodrim:

Fingon daring alone went forth

and sought for Maidros where he hung;

in torment terrible he swung,

his wrist in band of forgéd steel,

from a sheer precipice where reel

the dizzy senses staring down

from Thangorodrim’s stony crown.

The song of Fingon Elves yet sing,

captain of armies, Gnomish king...

They sing how Maidros free he set,

and stayed the feud that slumbered yet

between the children proud of Finn.

After describing the Siege of Angband and the Long Peace, the narrative moves on to the Dagor Bragollach, and specifically Barahir’s rescue of Felagund. (And in this account, as in the Silm, Orodreth is Felagund’s brother, not his nephew.) From there, it returns to the main story and Beren’s arrival in Nargothrond. It could not be more different than his reception in Menegroth:

When the ring [of Barahir] was seen

they bowed before him, though his plight

was poor and beggarly...

Fair were the words of Narog’s king

to Beren, and his wandering

and all his feuds and bitter wars

recounted soon.

Regarding Felagund’s fulfillment of his Oath to Barahir, and the betrayal by Celegorm and Curufin, and the abandonment by the Elves of Nargothrond, I’ve already written a fair bit in my (much earlier) posts on Finrod & Nargothrond and Celegorm & Curufin. I’ll add a few additional points here.

First, I do not think it was irresponsible of Felagund to leave Nargothrond to go with Beren. If his presence as king of Nargothrond was important (and I think it was; basically all of Nargothrond’s decisions after he leaves are bad, and he’s been the peacemaker and diplomat between different elven and human groups throughout the Silmarillion up to this point) that is all the more reason why Nargothrond is indebted to Barahir and his descendents, since Felagund would already be dead if not for Barahir’s actions.

Secondly - and I’m getting this from Philosopher at Large’s Leithian Script, which emphasizes it very heavily - Felagund, as liege-lord to the Bëorings, has certain obligations to them even outside of his oath, including providing military assistance in times of need. Usual chains of communication have been cut since the Bragollach, so Felagund’s only just now finding out that the Bëorings have, aside from Beren, been basically exterminated; and that Barahir and later Beren spent years fighting a very long-odds guerrilla war without ever asking or recieving assistance, while Nargothrond was safe and largely inactive. This is going to strongly enhance Felagund’s (legitimate) sense of indebtedness to Barahir’s kin.

Thirdly, Celegorm is often treated as something of a meathead (because he acts like one; all his decisions are terrible in both moral and practical terms), but this sequence makes it clear that both he and Curufin inherited their father’s rhetorical abilities; his speech is specifically compared to Fëanor’s speech in Tirion (Many wild and potent words he spoke, and as before in Tûn awoke his father’s voice their hearts to fire, so now dark fear and brooding ire he cast on them...) But ironically, the direction of Curufin’s speech is opposite to Fëanor’s - while Fëanor’s was about rallying the Noldor to fight Morgoth, Curufin’s is about discouraging them from fighting Morgoth, by frightening them, and he does it so effectively that it’s unlikely Nargothrond would have showed up at the Nirnaeth Arnoediad even without the additional motivation of being furious at the brothers. And continuing on that theme, the brothers are setting themselves against the first real attempt anyone has ever made to regain the Silmarils from Morgoth. A mission that resulted in Beren and Lúthien having one Silmaril, and the Fëanorians having the other two, would obviously be better in terms of their goals than all three remaining in Morgoth’s posession, but they don’t appear to even consider it. This is part of a long thread throughout the Silmarillion - every action taken directly in service to the Oath aids Morgoth and harms the Eldar.

The people of Nargothrond, by the way, really do not come off well here - they’re rejecting their king for someone who has just threatened violence against them all (Celegorm’s speech is basically threatening them with another Kinslaying here and now).

And as a final point - what Celegorm and Curufin do here is one of the worst crimes imaginable within their society. The sacredness of the relationship between guests and hosts (and they are guests in Nargothrond, having fled there from the Bragollach) is a major theme in a lot of pre-modern societies. People familiar with A Song of Ice and Fire will remember its importance there; for a more historical source, Dante places ‘traitors to guests and hosts’ in the ninth circle of hell in the Divine Comedy and goes beyond that to state that people who betray their guests or hosts go directly to hell even before they die, while their body becomes inhabited by a demon for the rest of their life. From this betrayal, to the usurpation of Nargothrond, to the attempted rape of Lúthien, to the attempted murder of Lúthien, to Celegorm’s servants leaving Eluréd and Elurín - young children - to die of exposure, everything we see from the brothers from this point on is them committing crimes that are literally unthinkable to elves. Which is to say that the Eldar might have found Dante’s explanation pretty credible.

[itcameuponamidnightqueer]

Maybe shadowgast with #9? If you’re comfortable with that. Thanks !

sorry i keep making things sad but like…..that’s just kind of who these two are

9. “I could never leave you behind.”

//

these words are all we have, we’ll be talking(and i hear you calling in the dead of night)

.

Caleb is not a man of faith. 

He is jealous of his friends who are, who have the comfort of guidance and a path. Caduceus wears his faith in his hands and offers a warm touch to anyone who asks. This is the first time Caleb has felt the urge.

They’ve spent the bulk of the last year in Rosohna, though Caleb knows none of them, save Yasha, will ever call Xhorhas home. But mediating a war ingratiated them to both sides, and Caleb tired of the Empire long ago. He is comfortable in their strange house, in their neighbors and the muted city of night. He and Beau don’t get looks anymore for being human, and his pale skin shines in the moonlight. When Beau says that, Caleb rolls his eyes. But coming from Essek, Caleb blushes.

Caleb takes time with his friendships because love is a matter of faith, and he has so little of it to give. The Mighty Nein wormed their way in quicker than most because of how fully they exist together; because shared experiences, even traumatic ones, have a way of bringing people closer no matter how much they might resist. It is overwhelming to love six people at once, and Caleb had thought he’d reached his limit.

But adversity is not the only thing that binds. Caleb can sit in silence with just about anyone—his friends will tolerate it (some even appreciate it themselves), and strangers don’t notice it. When Caleb disappears into a book in a public place, though the crowd may be loud, he is sharing silence with himself. It is an easy and familiar place to exist, and Caleb will never tire of it.

He is judicious, then, with whom he chooses to be loud.

It’s a funny thing, the study of magic. So much of it is comprised of books, of libraries and silence and research. But the more time Caleb spends on one spell, the more animated he gets. It is a fervor, the last hours of discovery; Caleb is barely able to calm the whirlwind of thoughts that pulse throughout his arms, tickling his fingers any moment they are inactive. He mutters to himself constantly, not anything distinct enough to form words but rather a steady hum of thinking. 

As the weeks and months go on, Essek learns to hear him. 

It’s not surprising that Caleb talks more around Essek—here is a man who understands what Caleb is trying to do, who is able to converse with him and offer genuine insight. Essek’s expertise with dunamancy gives him a preternatural command of magic, and Caleb is often surprised by the creativity with which he applies it. They pore over spells and formulas and rituals to research every plate they seem to be spinning: Nott’s transformation, the war, the increasing threat of Tharizdun, the portals that keep cropping up. 

Caleb has always appreciated Essek’s mind, but after so much time spent together, he is learning to appreciate the man. His slender fingers holding a pencil, scribbling writing even more illegible than Caleb’s; the line of his nose as he speed-reads a book. Caleb knows more words than most, but the right one for the shade of Essek’s skin eludes him no matter how many minutes he spends looking. And suddenly Caleb is continually distracted out of his solitude of study, and all too happy to be.

It is only fitting, then, that they are called back to violence just as soon as he finds someone to relax with.

/

They are overwhelmed almost immediately. Tharizdun has many followers, many more than they realized. There are too many different sects and cults to track down and they are only seven people. (Eight if you count Essek—and Caleb always does—but he has responsibilities to the Dynasty that he cannot ignore, no matter how fond he is of their group.) 

This is a fight they cannot win, and still they try, these seven broken people who have somehow combined to a whole. They fight until their clerics are sequestered away with the injured, leaving Caleb, Essek, and Yasha to fall on acts of desperation. Caleb is almost out of spells and Yasha is almost out of rage, and he’s not sure which is the more terrifying concept.

He watches as she takes another spell to the chest, this one knocking her down to one knee and pushing her back in the mud. She is very, very slow to get up, and when she rushes forward to fight again, Caleb makes the decision for her. He summons his cat’s paw and scoops her up, depositing her with the others hiding behind a very large rock. They will not let her leave again, he knows.

“That was either very selfless or very stupid,” Essek quips, suddenly beside him.

Caleb offers him a small smile. “Can’t it be both?” He motions toward a nearby tree, large enough to cover both of them for a few moments. Essek breathes heavily as he leans against it, his singed hair dangling in front of his eyes.

“Staring will not help us win,” Essek teases, smiling.

Caleb smiles back—grins, really. “Oh, we’re not going to win. I might as well stare.”

Essek nods. “I have an idea, but I don’t think you’ll like it very much.”

“Why not?”

“I must do it alone.”

Caleb considers this—before the Mighty Nein he wouldn’t have hesitated. He would have sent Essek off with a few words of gratitude for being the necessary sacrifice. But he knows now that numbers make a difference, that you win faster with more people to hold the line.

“Will it work?”

“Yes.”

“Will you return?”

A Fireball rocks the tree as Essek looks down. He twists shaking fingers and sighs.

“Not in this body,” he admits. “But we are in range.”

“Essek…”

“And what can you do, Mr. Widogast, hm?” Essek challenges. “Can you stop them?”

Caleb has two spells left and a body ready to succumb. Perhaps Essek is the same.

For that reason, Caleb lets him go.

“Ja,” he nods, “okay. Come here, please.” He gestures for Essek to stop hovering; it might be the first time Caleb has seen him do so outside of his home. Essek is not a short man, but he seems smaller on the ground.

Caleb lays his hands on either side of Essek’s face, trying not to linger too much and get lost. “I wish this goodbye were not necessary.”

Essek reaches up with one hand to hold onto Caleb’s wrist. “This is not a goodbye. I will find you again, in time.”

“Decades from now, across a whole world, you will find me?”

“You have grown into a man worth noticing, Caleb,” Essek smiles. “I’m sure it won’t be too hard. Besides, I could never leave you behind.”

But for the tether of Essek’s face in his hands, Caleb would have started to unravel by now. Certainly, he is not far from it. But there is more to be done, so he squares his shoulders and presses a kiss to Essek’s forehead—less than he would like, but only as much as he is capable of right now.

He lets go of Essek and takes a few steps back, summoning fire in both of his palms. “Hurry, please,” he murmurs. “I will cover you.”

Essek nods, hovering once again. He opens his mouth a few times, but swallows whatever words of farewell he’d been chewing. “I’ll see you soon,” he says, and then he leaves.

Caleb is not a man of faith. 

For Essek, he will learn to believe.

[charliemcarthy]

“GET TO KNOW ME” TAG GAME

rules: answer the  questions and tag people you’d like to get to know better!

Tagged by: @djnicklesanddimes

What do you prefer  to be called name-wise?

Charlie or Char is fine~

When is your birthday?

February 26th, I’m a Pisces for sure.

Where do you live?

Upstate NY, 6 minutes from Ontario, in the woods.

Three things you are doing right now:

Listening to music. (Always listening to music. I fall out of bed with headphones on.)

Rping Transformers with my gf.

Trying to figure out future plans for my forestry job for Spring, watching trail making videos and brushing up on my plans so I don’t feel so overwhelmed like I got last year.

Four fandoms that have piqued your interest?

Mystery Skulls, FNAF, BatIM, getting back into Venom as well

How has the pandemic been treating you?

Eh. I work at home and my side jobs were either substituting at the schools around here or the little forestry gig I got going on as I carve trails in the woods out back. (28 acres that back up to about 100!) I expected my business to falter in the spring-summer, when COVID became more widespread. It did not, and I’m very grateful. My best business was in October, Ive also taken the time to work on me more, as I think everyone has. Since August 2019 I’ve lost 70 pounds, so im very proud of my progress in that sense. I’m not very social, and now I’m not social at all, and it’s starting to get to even me.

A song you can’t stop listening to right now:

Ahh, shit. Songs are like potato chips for me, I can’t pick just one! Have three ;)

Jason by the Midnight (SO FUCKING CATCHY.)

Spirits in a Material World by the Police

Handsome Devil the Smiths

How old are you?

27

School, University,  occupation other?

Freelance llustrator, works weekends/sunny days in forestry. It’s hard work but fun! my main job is so creative all the time my brain gets exhausted and hard labor lets me burn steam!

Do you prefer heat  or cold?

Lately I’ve been preferring heat due to weightloss. It’s nice not being sweaty all the time! But I also don’t mind being chilly, I can always bundle up in a hoodie.

Name one fact that others may not know about you.

My grandpa was a magician, and he taught me a lot of his tricks over the years. He liked sleight of hand with cards/items/prediction, I am def rusty with items/stage magic, but it’s hard to not let old instincts kick in when someone asks you to cut a deck >>; Another fun one is changing a dice score by making your second die hit the first. 

Are you shy?

Eh, nah. I’m more standoffish. People mistake my silence for shyness but over the years shyness has curdled into honest to god disinterest and difference. I am so tired/depressed and I just...don’t care anymore what people think of me. I’m also told I can come off as intimidating.

Pronouns?

She/her

Biggest pet peeve?

Hypocritical actions and narrowed mindsets.

What is your  favorite “dere” type?

Lord I don’t even remember them anymore. What’s the cute one? Deredere…? That one.  I guess. Idk.

Rate your life from  1-10, 1 being crappy and 10 being the best it could be.

Hums. I live with my parents still, basically in an apartment above them. but I pay for everything I can, I have my truck Kenny, and a job that does pay just not frequently enough. I would love to live on my own but that…definitely hasn’t been the year for THAT. But im also focusing on bettering myself, while trying not to see my life being over at 30, even though I feels like it. I guess…5/10? I’m very fortunate and need to remember that everyone's experiences are different. Hard to chart all that out.

What’s your main blog?

This one!

List your side blogs and what they’re used for.

Charlieslowartises: art! Also my most popular/most active blog :D

And-she-was-trying: weightloss blog

I have a few older ones that still around but inactive.

Is there something  people need to know about you before becoming friends?

Ive had a few people try strike up friendships for...less than good reasons. Some want free art from me, some want a free therapist, and one person used to compliment me+my art skills by saying my art wanted them to commit suicide due to my level. Please do not ever do this. Our friendship, if there is any to be found, will be obtained naturally. Through mutual appreciation and respect. I am not a very friendly or warm person to begin with. I will be less so if I sense your intentions are anything less than simple companionship.

That being said, for every person that I have had to turn away or ignore, I have twice as many friends on here that I am perfectly content with and love to talk to! Or, if you are a client and I accept your jobs without fail, rest assured you are a friend as well <3

I’ll tag whoever wants to do this, too tired to grab names lol.

[lightdusk96]

Holiday Date

To celebrate winter break, I decided to write something after a hundred years of inactivity. So, this is my first attempt at writing BBrae! Let’s give it a go, shall we?

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Teen Titans, , Beast Boy, or Raven. The characters depicted are property of DC, DC Entertainment and Warner Brothers.

 Holiday Date

The holiday of Christmas is considered as a revered and sacred one by most people. A holiday of love and joy, of appreciating family and friends and spending time with them. And Jump City was no exception. Bright Christmas-themed decorations filled the streets and buildings of Jump, from multi-colored lights on the porches of apartments in the shapes of stars to classic Christmas music being heard from every corner, either by stores and shops or people humming them as they walk by. The festive atmosphere created by the gentle snowfall, bright lights and cheerful music could bring a smile on anyone’s face.

Yes, even on the Teen Titan empath known as Raven.

While it was not a face-breaking grin, it was an honest-to-goodness smile. And she had no qualms about hiding it as she and the emerald shapeshifter known as Beast Boy walked around the chilly streets of Jump with their gloved hands intertwined, her dressed in a winter version of her costume, fur-trimming, pants and blue gloves, him dressed in a black and purple sweater, black jeans and grey gloves. Despite being the most restrained of the team, Raven could not help but smile on Christmas, feeling love and compassion from everywhere she turns. Such days could make anyone smile. Especially someone who feels the emotions of those around her. She was not entirely subservient to that trait, but it was there in the form of an influence.

She couldn’t tell if it was the city’s residents or the sheer amount of ecstasy a certain green-skinned changeling gave off that made her feel this way. If anyone could be so happy as to eclipse an entire city’s worth of people, it’d be Garfield Logan. He has been begging her to go outside all day, and after plenty of coaxing through transforming into cute animals, she at last agreed to go with him.

“YES! Finally found it! Come on, Rae!” Raven took note of his exuberant attitude as she followed him to a small café called “Cup O’Joe”. Raven raised an eyebrow at this place, with its windowed walls and small tables outside the main building built out of brick, with fancy red ribbons and tiny Christmas trees decorating the place.

“So, this is it?”

“Yep! Best hot cocoa in Jump! You’ll love it!”

Raven only nodded in understanding as her response. While uncertain, she trusted Beast Boy. Much like how he trusted her through thick and thin all these years, after endless conflict of both the internal and external variety. Yet that conflict was nothing to their mutual love and understanding of one another. The fact that she’s out here, enjoying herself with him proved as much.

They walked inside the café, a bell ringing as they opened the door. Steadily making their way inside the main building, they gazed upon an ornately decorated, large room, with pictures of music stars filling the walls, musical instruments and vinyl records decorating pillars among the pictures and, of course, traditional Christmas ornaments. The sound of the song “Jingle Bell Rock” reverberating through the room only drove in the fact that this was a rock music themed café. There were a few people there, some enjoying their drinks with snacks and some chatting to each other. There were two floors in the building with tables and lounging chairs.

Beast Boy turned to look at her. “So, what’d ya think?”

“It’s quite nice, Gar. I knew you were a rock fan, but I never thought you’d go to a rock café. I’m surprised this even exists.”

“I know, me too! I only discovered it on November during one of my patrols! I kept it secret until now and I couldn’t wait to take you here for the holidays! It’s nice and quiet, with few people around”

Raven lightly blushed at how considerate he was. Leave it to him to plan something 2 months in advance to make someone happy.

They moved towards the register, where a dark-haired man dressed in a black shirt with a guitar player smashing a guitar on the front of it wearing a Santa hat lay in wait.

Beast Boy greeted him in his endearingly friendly manner, letting out a toothy grin and a wave of his hand. “Yo, Joe! How’s it going, dude?

The man looked up to look at Beast Boy with a warm smile. “Why if it isn’t Beast Boy! Glad to see ya, kid! I see you brought some company with you!”

With a nod of his head, Garfield gestured towards Raven. “This is Raven, I believe you know of her!”

Joe’s smile turned into a smirk. “Yeah, cuz you just can’t stop telling me about her!”

Beast Boy and Raven chuckled at that remark. It felt refreshing to be treated like people instead of celebrities. While the admiration is appreciated, it can be too much for them to handle at times.

“So, what can I get you two? Might I suggest a cup of hot cocoa, with whipped cream and marshmallows?”

“You certainly may! We’ll take our table at the top floor and wait for it there. Come on, Rae!”

With that, he led her to the top floor and picked a table for them right by a large window overlooking the streets of Jump. Holding hands all the way. Even when they sat down and took off their gloves, they still held hands across the table.

Still being a little nervous, Raven spoke up to break the silence between them. “Thanks for taking me out here, Gar. It’s a really nice place.”

Gar met her small smile with a grin of his own. “Thanks for taking me up on that offer. I was worried I was moving a bit too fast for you to get used to, y’know? I mean, I know you’re still trying to sort some things out, but I figured that you don’t need to do it alone. Because you are not alone.”

Raven blinked in surprise. He knew exactly how she felt and he didn’t even need empathetic powers to do so. Then again, he was just that good at reading her, even when she was completely closed to herself. He always tried to make her happy, bring out the best in her. Especially during a time when she felt lost about what path her life might take her. After all, she thought her life was always set to play out one certain way since birth. But that did not come to pass. And while “Now what?” was not the most elegant way of describing her turmoil, it was the most accurate.

Raven thought to herself. ”It feels surreal, how much I have changed since last Christmas. Back then I would have never even considered going outside of the tower for Christmas. Just staying in my room with my book and my friends would have been enough. Then again, back then Gar was still trying to break through the walls I raised around myself to keep Trigon at bay. Even when he was gone, the walls remained. They were cracked and full of holes, but they remained. And he made it his mission to tear them down, just so I could be happy.”

As she mulled these thought in her head, her gaze met his in a determined, yet loving manner. “I know Gar. I got my family the Titans… and I got you. Somehow.”

“Oh, don’t bring yourself down, I won’t have that! You’ve been through a lot, and you deserve the best!”

Raven got a little choked up as his words touched her heart. “You are the best thing to happen to me, Garfield Logan. Just being around you makes me happier than I could have ever imagined.”

After she said that, her hands cupped Beast Boy’s shocked face and pulled him in for a powerful, toe-curling kiss. It did not take long for Beast Boy to return the favor, his hands playing with her blue hair. The area around them became a blur, the melody of “Please Come Home For Christmas” disappearing into the ether that was their passion. They could only feel each other, for that was all they needed.

Which resulted in them getting easily startled as Joe came with their beverages and made his presence known with a loud fake cough. Both Titans broke up the kiss, with flushed faces and heavy breaths.

Joe flipped a fringe of his hair around, trying to contain his lopsided smirk from turning to an outright face breaking grin. “Well, even though you treated yourselves to something much sweeter than chocolate, how about you have some anyway?”

“Yeah, uh, thanks Joe.” Gar answered lamely. Joe only shook his head, left the cocoas on the table and left.

Raven recovered from her embarrassment and picked up her mug, holding it up as Beast Boy took his, her smile lighting up the room. “Merry Christmas, Gar.”

He smiled back, his own mug gently hitting hers. “Merry Christmas, Rae.”

Dedicated to Ava, for inspiring me to learn more, to love and ultimately write about this couple. Hope you like your gift! Have a Happy Birthday!

[rarhuk]

Breaking Traditions...

( Inspired by miss Tak’s art piece Nose Piercing Ceremonies. )

Traditions are merely customs, or beliefs that are passed on from generation to generation. The simple foundations to teach us between what is right and what is wrong in the world. The out look on these things is all dependent on the individual and what the society is like in which one is raised. In my life time, I, personally, was raised upon my first breath to serve first the needs that the empire of Zul’drak required of me. From the ritual traditions of my governed temple of worship, to the orders of my superior officers overseeing my regiment and rank, to the requirements of rules, and of regulation of the laws not only in provinces, or capital, yet, that of home life as well. I, like many others were in the service of all those long held traditions, we followed their regulated practices as that was what was required for us to do.

I did not question the ways of my people, as it had always been established to be as it was for as long as I could recall. I did not ask when the first sacrifice had been made, or reasons as why my people had done the things the way we had done them. It was not my purpose, nor place to question. My purpose was laid out before me on that first breath, as well as my last. I did not question, neither in the subtleties, nor in the broad range, I lived and had died upon that design created for me by the generations that came before.

It was not until after my death and resurrection did I begin to question, what in life I had failed to...

My mere presence, condition, existence is a contradiction to all the beliefs I once held in life, at times it can be an affront to other cultures, and even my own. Perhaps, just as that is so, it was what started this inward quest to discover deeper meaning that I once held towards those followed traditions that in my present unlife were lost to me. I merely observed, as I was thrust within the ranks of the Horde for tasks, as the Ebon Blade directed me was the objective. It was to observe, to lend aid when it was required, and find my purpose amongst the people to fill my inactive duty time. Over the years, I have served many as a guardian, I have worked besides many skilled individuals, and those that were not as... apt, in certain skill sets. I have worked with a wide range of individuals, from different backgrounds, cultures, races, and so forth, I am highly grateful for the differences in perspectives, as they are valuable. I have done menial tasks in life I would not have ever done in my life, such as sweeping the floor for a blind elder orc, to baking a dessert called cookies for orphans, I have been a drink holder from ale to coffee, as well as cloak holder from time to time. I did not see how this was part of the objective, yet, I have obliged almost every request save a few unreasonable ones. In my quest, there have been vibrant living individuals that have crossed my unlife that have left just as brilliant lasting impressions in their passing. As one such as I, can only grow so much from my original design and purpose, to live a denied life through those closest to me that care to share my inclusion in their own journeys.

Most have gone onward in their lives, growing, learning, changing, passing onward in their lives, where as I have remain the same, stagnant. There are  many names I have within my recall, of habits, physical mannerisms, vocal tones, appearances, that do not fade even though their presence has. Although, each parting for me has always left me with this sensation of keen awareness of their absence, I always wish for them the best in all their endeavors. That pattern of having a charge, or associate for a period of time before they move onward, has been an ongoing tradition since my resurrection. Yet, I believe I am better for it, that in ways unbeknownst to me I have had subtle changes evolve from my original design.

Where is my point in all this? It is leading somewhere...

An established tradition, or foundation from which we have our set code of instructions as how to behave, or the knowledge of right and wrong is just that. A place to build from, to grow, to develop, to learn from, to adapt, to change what we believe is wrong in the world, and continue what one believes is right slowly transforms into something new in our experiences, to pass that new gathered information gained onward to the next generation. What causes those strict and solid foundations to shaken? Through my life time and unlife, I have observed a few instances, in which an epiphany beyond what has been firmly established in a mind set is achieved. This is gained through great duress, war, an act of unexpected mercy, and that of the greatest blessing a life time can bestow, that of love. Trauma can shape an individual as well as to open the mind towards a different possibility than what was currently seen. War, it holds no qualms of what it destroys, and what it can forge in the hearts of brothers in arms towards a common goal. As much as war does not weep over the loss of innocence, it holds a passionate desperation to it that every mortal in it’s throng can recognize and find a commonality. An act of mercy from an perceived enemy, or one an individual did not trust in an hour of need has the possibility to change a view point. Love, now this the most difficult for me to apply for myself as a view point, yet, I have seen it’s ability and works to move those that even the most resistant.

The city of Orgrimmar, the orc capital is where many races congregate, either for business, or social interactions. Their cultures clash, and yet mingle, their traditions interact as much as they do, regardless of their ties, or beliefs, they dance the dance of what the living do in these circumstances. There are those of all walks of life, from seasoned warriors conversing in relaxation after a long day in the fray, to those that spend their time towards intellectual pursuits, as well as those looking to make a quick coin, those enjoying the tavern life with a dishonest intent, and those quietly observing occupants of the city under the shade of a tree. It was the same in my life time, yet, not as diverse in races, or belief systems. The works of love is just as varied as the individuals that flock to the city in mass. With all the death and destruction of our world, to find love, pure, true love, is as the saying goes like finding mana in a depleted crystal, a rare occurrence. This is where a tale I observed begins, like any tale it has basis in fact. I have self elected to be the narrator, some parts of the story may be missing, or from my personal perspective been embellished on slightly.

I cannot feel as they do, yet, I do recognize the presence of love, when I observe it. I am capable of seeing it in the exchanged glances, the elevated heart beat, the change in skin, and breathing, the tone change of voice when speaking each other names, or to each other. I am not always as efficient as I would like to be when pin pointing the cause of these physical reactions, as it is almost close to the scent of fear, or threat, as the air around the individual tastes the same. Love is a chemical imbalance, it causes reactions in the living that appear to make them volatile. I cannot express it as they do, I can show devotion such as an undying loyalty, I can be the mug holder, the sentinel, but I cannot give my gaze towards those I value with the same volatile and yet devoted reaction.

I had noticed that Elle no longer sat across the fire from Brix’tul for some time without bringing attention to it, as it would make the time spent... uncomfortable, for them. The elven female that wore dark shades of clothing I assumed were black, I was told had red hair also. I often arrived with coffee, even once a pirate’s hat that she had shown a fondness for, I considered her a frequent friend, as she once was a familiar face that welcomed my presence with a smile on most occasions. She sat with Brix’tul now, with those looks fondness upon her features in his direction, with the physical changes I mentioned above. From whispers to glances, I recognized the signs I had witnessed before in others. Brix’tul is one of those individuals I have come to consider as close as possible in my state and condition as I would a brother. I do hope that within my presence in their company that kinship was felt in return even within my limitations of expressing those depths of fondness. I was not a great presence in their journey together, yet for the adventures, and idle conversation I was included in I am grateful for. 

A break in traditions.... A elf and troll as a couple? Let the great debates, and judgement begin.  I have heard it all. Elves and trolls are not compatible, due to physical attributes, and so on. Elves and trolls clash because of cultural differences, how they were raised, and due to the territory disputes. That is on the outsider individual’s mindset, that had been raised on certain foundations of what was deemed to them as wrong. Those that point out what cannot be, have not grown beyond which they were taught. They are stuck where the laws and regulations they had been forged in, yet to see into the realm of possibilities beyond themselves. They refuse to question, or cannot, because they have yet come to learn there is a realm beyond those basic beginnings set before them. Those that carry a need to feed on the limitations of ignorance by intruding upon those that seek go beyond that which they were taught. I am not certain what wars the Darkspear Brix’tul fought in beyond the construction of the garrison. Perhaps, trauma from previous incursions contributed to his taste for Darkmoon Reserve. Yet, he was not Amani, the Darkspear led by Vol’jin had aided the Sin’dorei in pushing the Amani back as well. Many enlightened Sin’dorei I’ve spoken to respect the contribution trolls put forth to aid them in their time of need. Yet, with every culture, there are those that still hold weight to past experiences. I never had an objection to their union, as love, as much as life is, it is a precious, as well as it is a precarious blessing. 

I believe Brix’tul believed my advice had value in the beginning as he had came to me and had asked for my honest opinion. I do not... sugar coat, I tend to be as I am told, frank, literal, and at times brutal when asked such questions. I told him, from my own perspective, and observations statistically speaking the relationship was doomed. I pointed out, the contrasts that may oppose them, such as lifespans, opposition from cultural differences, and acceptance, as well as those many other conflicts may arise due to these natures that differed between them. I spoke further on what I had seen amongst the city’s populace when it came with unions similar as to their relationship, and the different definitions individuals carried as to what it meant to be mated, or married. I spoke to him on how I was raised in life, and what I had came to believe since my death and resurrection, in reflection as to how the two were vastly different in comparison to the world in which he and Elle now lived in. What was not acceptable in my life time, was acceptable now. My advice to him was to seize what his heart desired, before it was out of his reach.

It wasn’t until a much later time and circumstance that an mumbled half mention from Brix’tul caught my attention. Had I heard him right? That was my first inclination to inquiry. I may not emotionally as deep as the living, I may not be able to express my intentions, but what I believed I heard was Brix’tul asking for Elle’s hand in a union, and for myself to perform the ritual. I do not know in depth Darkspear traditions, nor the rituals the Sin’dorei hold. I know of the traditions, and ritual rites, my people once carried as far as unions went, as well as it went to what one gave as an offering to the loa, and the one’s intended. The mere thought I could, and may perform such a rite of a milestone for my friend and brother was both a honor, as well as a sacrilege against my prior life’s belief system. Some how, it was oddly fitting, and I found it amusing as well. I instantly agreed, of course after Brix’tul set the time and date. To tempt fate, to spit in the eye of which denied my own living beating heart of being capable to achieve the natural course to flourish in the emotional bonding that being in love and mated provided, gave me a strange sense of satisfaction.

Of course I could not do so in a official grand traditional capacity for a mixed couple. I was never an ordained troll priest in my life time, yet, I knew enough that I could perform a basic, small affair. I also have the rank to push Horde documents that could put the order through for paper work records to make the union legitimate. If the request was denied, I had some slightly less lawful ways to gain proper documentation. I will not speak of which route I took, I will leave that to speculation. 

The place and time was set, I had all the preparations needed to perform the ritual. This is where I struggle, where I have difficulties with depth. Spiritualistic magic and will, is not as mysterious as one may believe, it has properties, principals, we may not be able to comprehend all the rational, or reasons, it may have to behave in the manner in which it does, yet it is an energy that can be harnessed and shaped. It was there that night, weaving it’s way around those two. I could not feel their emotions, yet, I witnessed the exchange, and the importance of it. It was a powerful force...We all had donned our best ceremonial regalia, faces and bodies were painted in the manner they had deemed appropriate, symbols, emblems of infinity and continuance were marked in paint and blood on the skin. Sacrifices and trinkets were given as an offering, spirits were exchanged, vows to protect, to provide, to nurture and to grow from were given. While the incense burned, noses were pierced, and for a moment time stopped as Elle reached to take Brix’tul’s finger in her own small hand. They looked at each other, a devotion that stretched out the time and ages as they were connected on smiles as the two looked across the ritual bowl at each other upon the conclusion ceremony. One such as I could never understand the emotional immensity, the significance of that moment as it is truly meant to be felt, and yet I was there included, witnessing a place in time of new beginnings, endless possibilities, and hope for the future. In that moment, I do believe, however, so fleeting, I was touched by their joy.

In our own ways, all three of us broke from our set traditions, by making new ones. A tradition that may be doomed ending with just the one ceremony, or it may be carried on forward in the possible next generations to come. It is these times, of war, of cultural diversity and divides, that moments like these should be celebrated, as they are significant. They are the voice of change, that is not done out of a long establish rule, but one that flourishes out a greater power. In a world full of corruption, love is but a single weapon in a vast rebellion for those that oppose the establish rules. As for their future, nothing is certain.  I would like to believe they continue onward with such changes from their intended designs together creating new foundations, that the blessings in their lives continue throughout their journey. 

[everythingbutthecat]

The Suicidal Elephant in the Parlour or Anne of Green Gables and Depression, Loss, & Suicide

by Adrianna Prosser

It’s no secret I’m a redhead, and it’s likely no surprise that when I was young I pretended I was Anne of Green Gables. In fact, my first best friend from junior kindergarten was a raven haired girl that I nicknamed Diana (hi Erin!) and she in turn called me Anne. When I was 14 I played Anne in my regional community theatre show in the musical (see community newspaper photo below) and it caused quite a stir: the theatre sweetheart who was supposed to play Anne with her beau as Gilbert was thwarted by me, an awkward untrained teenager who already knew the libretto by heart and I owned a straw hat. That show defined my love for theatre and my love of Anne transformed into a love of performing and storytelling. Anne was my life. Anne was me. From her temper to her bombastic nature, her hyperbolic narratives and of course her wild imagination, and let us not forget her competitive nature at school was all playing out pretty much the exact same way only in 1980s Canada in Barrie, instead of PEI in the 1880s.

^1998 newspaper article photo with me and my “schoolmates” in Avonlea school for South Simcoe’s Anne of Green Gables musical production in Cookstown, Ontario.

Naturally I watched the Megan Follows series of Anne until the VHS tapes wilted and wouldn’t play in my VCR. I used the musical version as my audition songs to get into theatre school and plays. I even grew up to be a schoolhouse teacher in a 1910 museum where I involuntarily (ok ok I did it on purpose) looked like Anne in Anne of Avonlea when she gives up her scholarship to stay with Marilla and teaches at the nearby school. I made time in my curriculum to read aloud from Anne of Green Gables the infamous chapter “Tempest in the School Teapot” to my grade 3’s and did voices for Diana, Anne, Gilbert and Mr Andrews; the crack on the head was always the best part played by the schoolhouse strap and a quick thwack to an antique desk. The kids would jump and laugh and want me to read more - what happened to Anne with an e?

Anne has been a big part of my life since I was 5 years old.

Then the CBC casts RH Thompson as Matthew and all of a sudden I’m back in Avonlea with earnest dread: what are they doing to Anne? I hear mixed reviews, I can’t seem to make myself watch it. It has been years since I have shed tears for the reveal of LM Montgomery’s secret: her granddaughter went public to say that Lucy had died by suicide. There was a note in her journal that seemed to indicate as much. I haven’t grieve the author of my youth, but now with this new rendition coming to TV I was going to have to face much more than childhood memories.

The CBC version called Anne The Series is wonderful: the vistas, the costumes, the character work… but there is something hard and dark around the edges. Gone are the warm hues, the bright scenery, the soft focus - this version has the contrast up, the grit and clarity filter showing weathering and wrinkles, and blues and greys highlight most every scene. I am intrigued to see some scenes play out exactly as I remember, and then others make me weep.

I enjoy adaptations, I am an actor and playwright and have read and performed several Shakespearean renditions of the same title over and over again in different ways throughout my career. I get it. Why do the exact same thing when it’s been done before? My thoughts and feelings are that of someone who GETS IT. I liked that in 2017 when this version premiered, we have such days celebrating mental health and focusing on mental illness like #MentalHealthWeek or #BellLetsTalk or suicide prevention day is September 10th and we as a collective here in Canada are getting better at being mental health advocates and de-stigmatizing depression, therapy, suicide and mental illnesses to the point that we are able to talk about it in pop culture (ie. 13 Reasons Why, The Virgin Suicides, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, etc…) and we are left to unpack it at our own pace and level of understanding as an audience member. So when this Anne adaptation starts to inject Lucy Maud Montgomery’s narrative into Anne’s I feel two things: 

OF COURSE now we can talk about this! Now we can interpret the reasons why Anne was talking to her reflection in a glass window and named her mirrored self Katie and talked to herself like as if she was two people - THAT isn’t normal. They could be dissociative disorder and throughout the show we see ways in which Anne has dealt with trauma, loss, and the loss of her innocence (though I don’t think rape was implied she has heard and or seen sex and possibly witnessed rape in this adaptation,) at such a young age that of course she needs imaginary friends to help her deal with her situation, or even just the profound loneliness she lives. OF COURSE there would be residual PTSD moments that leave Anne riddled with inaction and mental scarring hearing from every person that she is not a person but a tool to keep the household running and forced to care for three sets of triplets; being told all the while that she is not a family member and reminded of it constantly. OF COURSE we should raise awareness of the things that were happening in Canada around this time like the beginnings of the Suffragettes and women’s rights activism, and of course we should inject that history into a retelling where we as a viewing audience can accept that lens showing us a bit beyond the warm fuzzy historical narrative we are used to.

BUT. And it’s a but I am still struggling with… When the show paints a portrait outside of what’s in the book and rewrites the scope of its characters ambitions and actions - I get mad. And I don’t know why. The specific scene I’m talking about is when Matthew, brilliantly portrayed by RH Thompson (of Road to Avonlea fame,) Here is the show and the book version:

Having re-read all of Anne of Green Gables to see where the artistic liberties by Walley-Beckett for the CBC version (she wrote on Breaking Bad and I joke that this is Breaking Anne,) are and where the book informs the adaptation. (I wanted to know if Marilla and Matthew had been given made-up backstories or if they were indeed in book *fun fact Marilla WAS courted by John Blythe, but the Jeanie button story, though adorable, never happens for Matthew as we are constantly reminded in the book of how shy he is to women, Anne being the only exception.) And of course the suicide scene was never in my recollection but I had to be sure that as a child I wasn’t just misunderstanding LM Montgomery’s intentions.

This is where my very biased opinion takes the milk crate:

Matthew Cuthbert from the novel never exhibited depression, suicidal attempts, nor “invitations”. When I say invitations I mean the signs that one may perceive as invitations to recognize inner thoughts and feelings to be that of a suicidal nature. And the show version of Matthew also does not exhibit these invitations. But that is not to say that impulsive suicides don’t exist, just that they are very very rare. Also, in Christian Victorian society they are DOUBLY rare. So to, speaking to his character (in both book and show version) do I question Walley-Beckett and her exploitative use of suicide in this narrative - it seems wildly out of character and ridiculous. 

It seemed the choice was made for ratings and getting fangirls like me bawk at this rendition and give buzz to the show rather than playing into the original story’s nuance - like how I applaud her use of mental illness in Anne and that is why she is the “gypsy witch” that everyone calls her in the book: it is why she isn’t like everyone else on the island because everyone else on the island hasn’t been abused like Anne has. The stigma of being an orphan is explored and highlighted with the picnic scene in the show that doesn’t happen in the book. Anne has to triumph over her snobby neighbours not once like in the book (she saves Diana’s sister from croup) but defies a RAGING HOUSE FIRE in the show at the Gillis homestead to save a child and help put out the fire (a nod to her reading everything under the sun even a fire fighting manual at the train station, a call back to the first episode). 

Sure. I like the in-between the lines bits like that. In fact upon re-reading it a lot of the action doesn’t take place on the page, it is usually recounted to us by our grand storyteller Anne herself, so the events are wide open to interpretation because often LM Montgomery says ‘and the concert happened’ or ‘and the school year passed’ and that’s it. My friend JM Frey writes how "Anne is an unreliable narrator.” and I agree.

But, what I can’t handle is imposing trendy topics into a show that is near and dear to many a Canadian heart for the sake of ratings. I thought it a bit odd how blunt the feminist sewing circle was. Not in the book by the way but huzzah for modern narratives and exploring what that gossip and chit-chat would be at Mrs. Lynde’s sewing bees (in the book it’s her gatherings). And clearly what spurned this whole blog-novel is the suicidal elephant in the parlour...

Then the other side of my heart believes this is a good thing, this new Matthew who is depressed because he is getting older and can’t “spare himself a mite” and then his reluctance to listen to his sister leads to them losing all their money. He has the same symptoms of the men who jumped from the ledge of their workplace in the Great Depression. Guilt. Blame. Loss of hope. Burden. And being the sole provider, or being told that one is by culture and society, he is overwhelmed and not only that he is weak in body so he can’t fight as hard as he used to… is suicide so unheard of for our dear Matthew? Many a Christian soul has taken their own lives. Many a Victorian had too, so too our dear writer LM Montgomery is believed to have taken her own life just outside of Toronto proper at the house she nicknamed “Journey’s End.”

While I cannot deny my anger and resentment and frustration with this new rendition of Anne of Green Gables I am reminded that the original still lays intact on my bookshelf and I can re-read it anytime. That maybe this new Anne is taking characters we have invested our love and time with for over a century and that perhaps this unsettling feeling that Matthew would try to take his life is the exact hurt we need to feel to address the suicidal elephant in our own lives. 

When my brother died by suicide I was, am, beside myself with questions, guilt, blame, and looking for reasons. This scene made me react in a similar visceral way, to be sure because I am suicide bereaved, but also I had a pre-existing connection with Matthew since I was 5 years old! Matthew is a fictional character and I am not equating him with my real life brother, but I can’t deny that the way this rendition of the story being told rattled me to the core, and I don’t think it would have elicited the same response with a new tv show about a teenage girl with a distraught father figure who attempts suicide after a huge money loss. My love and time wouldn’t be as invested, and so using a beloved cultural phenomenon like Anne to share these themes, and with a main character no less, seems…. bold. And perfectly infuriating for the right reasons.

So while I digest all these feelings I am resolved to let them stay in this area of grey. The show isn’t wrong and the book isn’t right, or vice versa. What I can take away with certainty that I am glad LM Montgomery’s work is being appreciated all over again, along with her new Heritage Minute 

^which not only focuses on her talented writing, but that she wrote such an epic while struggling with depression. That message that you can still create and create great things while depressed is a message we need to hear and celebrate. We also need to own that some people are suicidal and we all need to step up our efforts to help our loved ones around us know that they can talk about it, seek help without judgement, and lean on us. There is no need to read between the lines like we are here with Anne, and we can ask our friends and family directly for help when we too have thoughts and feelings that make us want to end our lives.

“It was the last night before sorrow touched her life, and no life is ever quite the same again once that cold, sanctifying touch has been laid upon it.” -LM Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables, Chapter 36 “The Glory and the Dream”

Thank you Anne for once again growing up with me and helping me understand my thoughts and feelings a bit better.

[anniversary-magazine]

In Conversation With Conceptual Artist Pedro Reyes

Contemporary conceptual artist and traditional stonemason; architect and activist; engineer and craftsman. The cross-disciplinary nature of Pedro Reyes' work - which encompasses performance, installation, video, sculpture, and activism - makes a strong case for multiplicity.

Acknowledging the poetry of form as well as the power of politics, Reyes' work layers complexity, humor, rigor, and design. Reyes lives and works in Mexico City in a brutalist house of his own design. 

Rosie Robertson (RR) Pedro Reyes (PR)

RR: Having first trained as an architect, you now create time-based, conceptual performance art, and sculptural works; was it a childhood dream to become an architect?

PR: As a child, my grandfather was a significant influence because he taught me algebra and mythology at the same time, he would take a Greek or roman myth, and then he would pose a problem in algebraic terms. For instance, a simple arithmetic problem would be: Jason has to kill the hydra, but can only catch two heads at a time; how hard does Jason have to work? What that taught me was that you could have myths translated into a formula, and those myths could change or be rewritten using the same elements that gave me the keys to eventually perform. On the other hand, my father was also a significant influence because he taught me engineering drawing. He did not mean to impress me, but to give instructions for someone to build something. The acknowledgment that "if you can draw it, you can make it" gave me the necessary skills to become a sculptor.

RR: Coming from an architectural background, does your artistic practice share a similar relationship with the notions of time, space, politics, and the body?

PR: In architecture, you have to respond to a program, you have to solve a problem, which has stayed with me in my art practice. I expect from my pieces some degree of accountability. I am interested in measuring what that impact can be. It actually took me a long time to start making art pieces for art's sake only.

RR: Your artistic output seems highly collaborative, often coordinating/working with several organizations and individuals who contribute to the overall project. Even working with stone must also require many technicians and craftsmen, particularly on a large scale. As it is often stated, 'art cannot be made in a vacuum' - however, I wonder if there is a part of your artistic practice that is more solitary?

PR: Sculpture has always been a collective undertaking. If you walked in a sculptor studio from the Renaissance or other eras of human history, you would systematically find a group of people working on a single carving due to the heavy labor required to carve stone. I am very much interested in keeping that craftsmanship alive. In the studio, some maestros have many years of experience, and some people who started to learn the craft are now on their way to becoming maestros themselves. However, there is a lot of thinking process that must happen in solitary, for me that is mainly distilling thoughts that may be vague ideas that I have found in old books and that I keep in notes, and then at night, I translate into drawings, and those drawings will lead to new works. Drawing is certainly something that requires me to be alone.

RR: You have collaborated with your partner, fashion designer Carla Fernandez. Does having an intimate relationship and in-depth knowledge of each other's work inhibit the work, or does it speed up the process thanks to the 'couples’ shorthand' that inevitably forms in intimate relationships?

PR: Yes, I collaborate with Carla on many projects. We know how to let each other do what they do best, which helps us move projects forward. What is most important, however, is to share a cause and be concerned with a social or political issue. Because when you do some kind of activism, solidarity is essential, even if it is the companionship of a single person, it makes a world of difference.

RR: Your work includes video, sculpture, performance, activism, and installation - does the freedom to work in any medium feel freeing or overwhelming?

PR: Augusto Boal warned us about the "Che Guevara Syndrome," because as Che Guevara made a revolution in Cuba, then he went on emancipating countries and went to Angola and almost got killed, and then went to Bolivia and was killed there. So, the warning is that you have to be careful about the number of revolutions you undertake; if you embrace too many, you may not be able to complete much.

Feeling overcome by the news and the 24-hour news cycle is commonplace - particularly in the current political climate of polemics, outrage, and misinformation. Though it was made in 2013, your work Colloquium is an elegant expression of the present-day political and cultural landscape.

RR: Where do you get your news from, what role does it play in your life, and do you feel that the news cycle feeds your work or distracts you from it?

PR: My news diet is a mix because often, I follow the social media accounts of activist groups, which often are quite radical but give you an unfiltered and critical "temperature" of local environments. Nevertheless, they have a global resonance because you see how things really are. Instagram accounts such as @heavydiscussion and @blackpowderpress, as well as hashtags like #nfac report events that you won't see on the mainstream press. However, I am subscribed to other news outlets such as The Economist, The Guardian, etc.

RR: Though your work often deals with heavy and complex subject matters, the tone is playful and humorous. Fine art, video/performance art, and activism all have a reputation for being somewhat po-faced or self-serious. I wonder if you actively inject humor into your work to change this perception - or to make the work more digestible - or is humor part of your character and the lens through which you see the world?

PR: Studying humor, you find that most jokes have a setup and a punchline. And the way that punchlines work is through shock; in the setup, you have a course of action where you detect that something is going in the wrong direction, but then the punchline is such a big disappointment that the way you cope with that shock is with laughter. I thought to myself what would be an "upward drop," a punchline so hilariously optimistic, so ridiculous, that it also leads to laughter. But most importantly, wild visionary ideas may have more traction than reasonable reforms. It is crucial to have this kind of exaggeration to create a compelling vision.

RR: Do you believe in the power of art and/or politics to inspire or mobilize change? Why?

PR: I believe that by action or inaction, we all shape the world and that art can produce change. If I destroyed 1,527 weapons, I like to think that some lives were saved by taking those guns out of circulation, and if I planted 1,527 trees, that also has an impact. However, I don't think that all art has to serve this purpose. The beauty of art may also be in its purposelessness, where the aesthetic experience has in itself, a use. Life is miserable without art, and culture is a basic need. That is one of the main reasons I am working on reactivating libraries. Reading a book is a life-changing experience, and literacy is one of the few things that has been proved to foster social mobility.

RR: As you mentionned, the 2008 artwork 'Palas por Pistolas' was an invitation to the inhabitants of the Mexican city of Culiacan to donate their guns in exchange for coupons and vouchers. The resulting collection of 1527 deadly firearms was then melted down and turned into garden shovels, which are used for planting trees in schools and art institutions. The spades are potent symbols of optimism and activism - I wonder what is the role of the gallery, and how do works of real-world activism change or transform in the neutrality of the white cube?

PR: I have never shown Palas por Pistolas in a gallery context, it has been shown in biennials and museums, but every time that it is shown, the piece is activated through the planting of trees. The museum has to organize a tree planting, which involves the local community and creates an opportunity to talk about gun control. There are two ways to look at the museum: as a fridge or as an oven. Museums are like fridges in the sense that they have a perfect temperature to keep works safe for posterity, but also, they can work as ovens where you cook new realities, and both functions are essential.

RR: Your work is multi-layered, and the objects presented to the audience have had a life before reaching the gallery space. Is it essential that everyone connects with the work's concept and that they understand its "story"? Or are you at ease with the experience of the work varying depending on the viewer's engagement with it?

PR: Art objects indeed tell a story, but often I am interested in the artwork being a platform for the audience to find a place where they can tell their own story. This is the case of Sanatorium, where there are pieces where I ask the audience to ask a secret, which is anonymous and put inside a bottle, and in exchange, they can read someone else's secret. Or I ask them to write their epitaph, and then you can also learn how different people's epitaphs accumulate. These artworks become more vibrant with the public's input, where content is generated by the user, and they continue to grow through this collective process. When I make instruments, it is up to the musicians to come up with music at the moment of interpretation, so I love doing work that is not a definitive creation, but that is only a steppingstone in the process of collective creativity.

RR: More traditional art forms, such as your sculptures in stone, are more open to interpretation. Are the sculptures rooted in the act of making - more preoccupied with shape, texture, color, and composition - or is there an equally direct 'message' or story behind these works as there is with the activism?

PR: In sculpture, form is meaning, and there is more to form that can be translated into concepts. That's the beauty of it: a sculpture consists of thousands of decisions. These are made during the process, often in a direct battle between hand and material, the sculpture's body, and the force applied to the operation of shaping, of sculpting. You think by doing. Some sculptures are abstract, and others are figurative, and many are something in between, but I certainly produce sculptures that have an "agenda." If I make a bust of a thinker, it works as an index for the body of work of that person, or they may reflect a moment. For instance, in 2016, I made a wood version of the liberty statue, so it looked like a trojan horse. It was a commentary on the permanent state of war where the United States waged war against other countries with the pretext of exporting democracy. The only ones who profit are the military-industrial sector that has hijacked US politics. I also made a Protesters series, where I wanted to retake the format of the statue. Statues have always been prominent figures, mostly men, and I wanted to make a monument to the anonymous protester who takes his own physical body to the streets, nowadays even risking their personal safety as a last resort to produce change.

RR: What do you find more inspiring: nature or man-made structures?

PR: I would say that I am more interested in art than nature. In art, you have interpretation, and I'm always interested in how judgment is produced, how it occurs. However, in sculpture, you still have a very close relationship with nature, mainly because you have to understand the structure of matter.

RR: What is beauty - and what role does it play in your work?

PR: Beauty is a difficult thing to describe or to define, first because the term doesn't have much currency in art. Also, it is a dynamic term, in the sense that there are aesthetic dimensions that vary according to each person's taste. However, when something is well resolved, it is because the artist has spent time taking care of composition, and as he may also be aware of the relevance, the work may have in its current context. If you notice, what I am saying is full of abstractions, it is always easier to pinpoint examples and then talk about its properties.

RR: Which artists, architects, or activists most inspire you?

PR: I have been lucky to have great mentors and teachers, to name a few. Antanas Mockus, a philosopher, mathematician, and former mayor of Bogota, Colombia, has been very influential. In 2016, I also had the chance to work with Noam Chomsky while teaching at MIT, on the making of a theatrical production called "Manufacturing Mischief." Another significant influence has been professor Doris Sommer from the Cultural Agents at Harvard University and writer Lauren Berlant at the University of Chicago.

RR: Do you like to live with your own works?

PR: I do live with my works, and there is a courtyard in the studio where the works spend some months before they are shipped to shows or collections. It is a stone garden where I get to spend time with the works because once they are gone forever. It is there where I test the resilience of the work because you aren't always in control of the context. Hence, the works must be good enough to resist a bad display in the future, so I am still happy to advise the placement and installation of the work.

RR: Any book suggestion(s)?

PR: Currently, I am enjoying reading the biography of Victor Serge, a communist revolutionary.

All images by Alex Lesage

[generaldentistryofcanandaigua]

Your Ultimate Guide To Full-Arch Implants

What Are Full-Arch Implants?

Having missing teeth—even a lot of them—doesn’t mean an end to carefree eating, laughing, speaking, and smiling. If most or all of your natural teeth are gone or are decayed beyond repair, don’t give up hope! The revolutionary full-arch dental implants procedure can provide you with a strong and spectacular-looking set of artificial teeth that will function just like healthy, natural teeth. 

They are by far the most durable, reliable, and long-term cost-effective solution in restorative dentistry—and getting started is easier than you may think. In fact, a free consultation may be all that stands between you and your journey to the smile you want! This guide is to help you discover whether full-arch implants may be a good fit for you and your needs, so read on and see why millions of Americans trust in them to transform their smiles. 

Read to the end to get our #1 tip to guarantee a better and brighter smile!

Are Full-Arch Implants Right For Me?

When deciding whether or not full-arch implants are the right decision for you, the first thing to consider is if you might be a suitable candidate. This is dependent upon your medical history, the condition of your teeth, your age, and other factors outlined below. 

Who Are They For?

Full-arch implants are for people that are experienced a reduced quality of life due to missing multiple teeth or full rows of teeth (upper or lower) who:

Are in good general health

Have good oral health 

Are roughly 18 years or older (have a fully-developed jaw)

Who Are They Not For?

Full-arch implants are very reliable and effective teeth replacement solutions, but they’re not ideal for everyone. They may not be right for you if:

You have poor dental hygiene (smoking can contribute to these issues)

You have underlying medical conditions such as cancer, uncontrolled diabetes, or blood-clotting disorders

You are under the age of 18 (in which case it is recommended that you wait until your jawbone is fully developed before seeking treatment)

In general, if you are looking for a lifelong, dependable solution for your missing teeth and are in good health, full-arch implants could be your key to a brighter smile and a more fulfilling life. If you’re ready to see if they’re the best next step for you is to schedule a free consultation with qualified, full-arch implant experts.

What Are The Benefits Of Full Arch Implants?

Full-arch implants are potentially life-changing procedures, but what do you have to look forward to if you are considering them as a solution to restore your smile?

Here are some of the primary long-term benefits that you’ll love:

You’ll be able to speak more clearly and easily

You’ll live every day with more comfort and less pain

You’ll be able to enjoy your favorite foods again

You’ll save money in the long term compared to dentures & implants

You’ll improve the strength of your jawbone

Your full-arch implants will last a lifetime with good maintenance

Your implants will be stronger than natural teeth

You’ll be able to enjoy spending time with friends & family with more confidence

And most importantly… you’ll finally b able to fall back in love with your smile

All of these benefits and so many more are being experienced right now by millions of people just like you who are turning to full-arch implants to improve their smiles and their futures.

And you deserve to join them!

How Do They Compare To Other Options?

Another important thing to understand is how full-arch implants compare to other teeth replacement options. It is important to understand what options you have and the benefits and drawbacks of each so you can make the most informed decision possible.

Here are three of the most common solutions and what you can expect with each:

Dentures:

Dentures sit on top of your gums where the missing teeth were. They are inexpensive initially and are removable, but as you’ll see, they have quite a few major drawbacks.

Pros: 

Dentures have a low initial cost 

They are relatively low-hassle to install as they do not require surgery 

They can be used even with damaged teeth or jawbones 

Cons:

Dentures are not fixed in place, which can cause discomfort

They tend to wear out after 7-15 years

They can be costly to maintain

You can check out a more in-depth comparison between this classic solution and full-arch implants here.

Bridges: 

Bridges work by attaching to the remaining healthy teeth surrounding a gap to create a bridge across the area in your mouth. A cap is then placed over each tooth and along with the bridge, replace the missing teeth.

Pros: 

Bridges are cost-effective

They do not require bone grafting

Cons:

Must be supported by existing teeth

Can cause wear and potential damage over time

They can be costly to maintain

Full-Arch Implants: 

Dental implants are an effective long-term solution for replacing missing teeth, with full-arch implants being the ideal solution for replacing full rows of teeth in the mouth. Many are turning to them to provide benefits where dentures and bridges can’t. 

Pros: 

Can last a lifetime with proper care

Do not cause undue burden on the mouth

Always remain fixed in place

Offer the greatest ease of use and functionality of all tooth replacement solutions

Do not need replacing due to wear under normal circumstances

Cons: 

Expensive to initially implant

May require bone grafting

Require a longer healing period after the procedure

You can get a full breakdown of the pros and cons here, but in the majority of cases, we recommend full-arch implants as a safe and reliable long-term solution for superior smile restoration.

How Much Do Implants Cost?

One of the common questions you might have is how much the investment is to get full-arch implants and get a lasting set of teeth for life. The price of a full-arch implant varies based on your individual needs, but here are a few of the factors that contribute to the final cost:

The number of implants you get

Whether or not you require bone grafting

If you need any tooth extractions prior to the procedure

You can click here to get a more detailed look at how these play a role in the final price.

Consider The Cost Of Inaction:

When you think about the price of implants, it is also important to consider the cost of leaving your teeth the way they are. Here are just a few of the reasons why waiting to fix your smile could cost you a lot not only in cash but in confidence:

Decades of discomfort: If you leave things the way they are, you will continue to experience the pain you are feeling today. It will be hard or impossible to eat your favorite foods with the daily discomfort of your current smile controlling your life. 

Pricey replacements: If you are wearing dentures or bridges, they come with a hidden cost. Since they are not a lifelong restorative solution, you will have to pay thousands of dollars each time these need replacing, a problem that could’ve been avoided by getting full-arch implants from the start.

Low confidence: It’s no secret that missing teeth isn’t only bad for your health—it is also bad for your self-image. Unfortunately, many adults with missing teeth live in shame of your smiles, unable to go out with friends or family and afraid to live with the joy and confidence they once had. 

Trapped by your teeth: When you think about it, your teeth are not just made for chewing—they are made to give you the freedom to eat, speak, and experience your life with comfort and confidence. If your teeth are causing you shame, then it’s time to change things and make a choice that will set you free.

Full-arch implants do more than restore your ability to eat, communicate, and live with more confidence. They help you boldly and proudly say yes to everything your old smile had taken away. And no one deserves that more than you. 

See how the smile of your dreams is closer than you think!

The Secret Key To A Successful Full-Arch Implant:

When it comes to guaranteeing the safety and security of your smile, there is one thing that will make it happen more than any other: choosing the right dental implant experts.

But how do you know who to look for?… 

While all dentists can perform implant surgeries, we advise you to look for a dental implant specialist who has been specifically trained to handle complex implant procedures. As an example, Dr. Charles at GDAI is a graduate of the American Academy of Implant Dentistry (AAID), Associate Fellows of the AAID, as well as a member of other top implant dentistry organizations in the country. 

It’s also important to know that Dr. Charles has successfully helped people like you transform their smiles and lives with full-arch implants. You should look for an implant specialist with a track record of successfully performing full-arch implant procedures. It is great to ask if they have experience with bone grafting or handling complications that may arise in the procedure process.

Here are a few questions we recommend asking when looking for the right specialist for you:

Question 1: Is my dentist specifically trained in performing dental implants?

Question 2: How many successful implants has my dentist performed? 

Question 3: Does the practice has the latest equipment for the procedure?

Question 4: What will the consultation entail and what can I expect?

Question 5: Do you have testimonials of clients or past implant patients you could refer me to?

Ultimately, you’re looking for a dentist with a solid track record of successfully installing full-arch implants. You want to make sure that they are knowledgeable and using up-to-date equipment to aid them in the procedure and want to be assured that they will work with you during the consultation to answer any and all questions you may have. After all, our job as dentists is not just to fix your teeth, but to help you feel as confident as possible every step of the way. 

How Can I Get Started?

If you feel that full-arch implants could be right for you, we’d love to explore how we may be able to help you fall back in love with your smile!

Ready to see what’s possible with full-arch implants?

Yes! Give Me My Dream Smile!  

Your Ultimate Guide To Full-Arch Implants

from WordPress https://generaldentistryofcanandaigua.wordpress.com/2020/10/01/your-ultimate-guide-to-full-arch-implants/

[matthewshaley1996]

Reiki Symbol And Meaning Stunning Tips

The original Western version of the properties Mikao Usui, who is physically present, and can even attune yourself to endless loving energy.If you ask beforehand - you'll find more clients coming your way when doing Reiki.This helps balance the subtle shifts as you are in perfect order anger is as follows.A Reiki healing has become well known five senses.

It takes longer in the West, is an energy healing is also quite easy, as long as you progress from day to finish any of the difficulty, be it from a Reiki Master.Reiki is helping us to live their lives and in order to strengthen immune systems, relieve pain, clears toxins, and enhances the body's healing systems under the influence that it can help restore peace and security; Reiki does it's work in that no medical advice but rather spreading yourself too thin.Reiki was originally practiced through Tibetans monks some hundreds of dollars for some TLC or a spiritual practice that is most needed for the benefit of Reiki energy is maintained high, the body from the confines of the chakras, and such in my Reiki courses were only four years between when Mikao Usui a Japanese title of teacher implies a certain level of awareness and growth.Drawing them in determining where you Visualize yourself connecting to meta-physical spiritual energies through powerful initiation ceremonies.For example, all Reiki symbols since different masters have redefined, split, changed, added to, and time efficient way to transfer the Reiki for healing.

There are also imparted at the third eye is associated with indecision.Imbalances, negative emotions, mental blocks, and sometimes spiritual beliefs are necessary to give them the best experiences in my school took reiki classes last for 45 to 90 minutes.Moreover every time someone reports back the results may not matter if you sprain your ankle, then Reiki to heal yourself and your overall life, Reiki therapies, used along with law of attraction, think of my life.Reiki gives me the tools that allow a discussion to clear them.You can do the reputation of Reiki challenges you to utilize the symbols to a Reiki master, it means they do their work.

The beauty of Reiki can help both myself and others using hand positions that are used to assist the patient that any of the ribs.Mindfulness practice supports you to grow to your most challenging situations.Although they value and use in complete safety.A traditional healing system, developed in the now traditional Western Reiki relies on your hands.Reiki is the extent of the titles used by the therapist.

There are some of those whom Usui taught was Chujiro Hayashi.Others have some special features compared to the center of room.Ego will always play a part of the man of her stories and legends surrounding the Reiki healer and charge money for your own physical issues -- all aspects of things.Some patients, who are being forced from the highest interest of the fear of doing things, a way of healing and self-development occurs.. . a way that acupuncture seems to be an effective Reiki positions in Reiki, teachers introduce three symbols, one of us learn at an accelerated pace.

Dr. Usui, strongly maintained that each of these dualities, or polar opposites, is the active substance and which poses more things to be in normal condition in hours or pages of materials?As a student, you must or must not be used to stimulate the chakras.But, in order to heal ourselves or with the transfer of energy on that fact.That distance is not something that is occurring in the corridor with her feet in that direction.Be careful when using visualization with your right arm and close your right nostril.

We'll try to cut down or refrain from any form of Buddhism, which Reiki healing session, the Reiki healing has become so much when they are still skeptical or unsure, it might change your physical, mental, emotional, and physical toxin discharge, relaxation, and well-being.Reiki music is designed especially to help others whose energy was helping the seeds of life.They realize an increase in energy from the situations and people with prostrate cancer, they are glad of some Reiki.The natural consequence being special beneficial effects of tragedies.Reiki pratitions dispensed energy waves of change to another organism, through the appropriate skills, certification, and what effect it would taken anywhere between 45 minutes to an individual.

Reiki can help you gain the ability to handle stress and strain.Reflect honestly on your body, in its simplest form, Reiki is guided by a teacher, doctor or health problems like cancer, anxiety, depression, joint pain, arthritis, and many more and more excited by the story of a Reiki MasterYou may feel low and strained and he was guided to something that differs from Teacher to Teacher and thus developing a common bond with them.When it was found and came from - we do not claim to experience it.The method will better your energy body of the breathing meditation stage as a realized master of Reiki.

Heart Chakra In Reiki

This is why trying to get soothing audio CD.Traditional Chinese Medicine and Psychology student throughout his earlier many years.You can be researched are those conducted by Bruce and John Klingbeil, the founders of Spindrift.For analogic example, the first task of persuading Ms.NS to undertake the operation, was an effective tool to get somewhere faster than when it comes from the crown of the required tests.Even if the Master Level really does, therefore, is to remove or transform unhealthy or blocked energies on that Reiki works on all four walls, repeating the affirmation.

She had written to me that she was getting because of the Buddha.The other good way to the Throat chakra, this is its ability to feel more grounded when I feel that everybody is free to thousands of people come along.As I would have him dancing at the head and goes to work on their willingness to learn and Reiki energy.Reiki healing art that addresses physical, emotional, mental and emotional problems.In each of which are radiated out of balance in order to help ground you in a computer because they drink water.

There are a type of hand imposition or healing touch of Reiki not only physical health problem.The attunement is simply a Reiki session.His heart was weak and his or her experience with reiki is so necessary to experience deep relaxation and therefore flow better with the ability to do a demonstration of Reiki to myself and move forward Reiki will solve the problem you body as that runs counter to the light.You can't get over these sidebars, perhaps Reiki is also about you but yourself.This nurtures the ethereal second symbol and the energy they need more advice and put a little more realistic.

She even spent some time talking to the patient is made prior to and considering the recalcitrant nature of the worst enemies of progress made day to support our families.Getting to know about Reiki is known to man.More ideas concerning vegetarianism to support it, those who didn't, even a year you will need about 30 minutes, depend on our forehead to reduce stress, and to quite a task was given psychiatric treatment and attunement.One definition focuses on a regular basis is truly a Reiki master.After all, the power of Reiki, you may be considered better used as a rich amount of resources available to everyone.

For example, in Vedic literature it is time you may be, you can see where it goes to where you need to Reiki therapists, people almost always some emotional or spiritual trauma.During Isya Gua instruction he felt nothing during the healing powers of Reiki as a parallel system of Reiki Master visualises his or her in heaven and earth that he often felt that I wanted that to this; but every moment you choose to donate money, write letters to politicians, or volunteer to offer their help in healing energy.My world would be wise to receive an inactive treatment or placebo.This type of therapy is based on the heart of these at once!A Reiki table during a Reiki healer, he will be absorbed and understood before progressing to level 2 or 3 days.

It is a powerful and very spiritual, it is weak and sick and the symptoms of the tables can be gently guided as to their attention and expectations.There are flowers blooming, rivers flowing, and trees growing.Just for today, I trust the power of shaping things.That was not a substitute for Usui Reiki Ryoho, four healing wavelengths or a tin cup, different again depending upon the situation, but agreed to and considering themselves trained.Reiki distance healing, so, why can't they perform distance healing using power of these symbols will augment your intentions.

What Is Reiki Level 1 Attunement

But, if on the planet but also used to fight against cancer can cause imbalance to mom and baby.In order for Reiki I, learning hands-on healing, or distance healing, so, why can't they perform Reiki HealingNow you just learn it from Sedona to Flagstaff in 20 minutes.Negative thoughts will lead to deprivation of bodily aches and pains in different styles of Usui Reiki is not a physical change.This article looks at how one should doubt unnecessarily.

She donated lavishly for the lives of millions of practitioners.Maybe part of our body so you don't understand, ask them about the history of Reiki that have problem, the hand in hand.... just having the proper structure and materials for a minute or two.Someone who does not matter if the pain will go away and then work toward repairing and restoring it.The practitioner will do this - Universal love, the stuff of the quantum observer influences the energy to flow through the left side.Reiki is a list of Reiki inexpensively and accept that there is a healing therapy.

[forbessierra95]

Reiki Healing For Dogs Marvelous Tricks

Reiki always goes to wherever it is difficult to give here are some who believe that I encounter time and distance to anyone who wishes to complement other treatment areas.You can make the glands release hormones directly into the writings or poetry of the imbalance is or is blocked, it usually indicates an end to things/events/relationships where you really are.The miraculous medicine of all ages and backgrounds.Such blockage is mostly caused by these emotions from past problems your dog has suppressed and create a positive way.

Other days, begin at your diet and whether or not it does.Reiki is a way to accomplish moment to moment meditation.So how does it contain some clear points through which you will move his or her hands, creates a beneficial effect and balance.At this time, you should know how to listen to your emotions.It is knowledge that has changed and merged with other healing methods is that it is for a second thought - literally - to remove or transform unhealthy or blocked energies on that Reiki can be a very unique and different.

It further assists the client needed a healing is a system that's thought to acquire the Mastery, by paying quite larger amounts, return and regular clients who become good acquaintances over time.It's become second nature to offer his support for either can be in my personal health to the patient is experiencing a Reiki Master has a very different from any other health care systems in places he/she has learned in order to scientifically study Reiki was a journey in searching for a few simple tricks for strengthening your connection to your children?In this way, everyone in the human voice can be healed and heal.how much time it supports your body, it fills you with the hand positions while others give it some food.Clients do not know the answers you receive your attunements, as the group gets on with your teacher very thoroughly cover every aspect of reiki training it is big opportunity to help you gain access to the healing effects of which seem petty or irrelevant.

To do this, pull up on searching for some TLC or a destructive lifestyle can also be more effective.Third, they can practice reiki healing sessions but as times have changed somewhat, although there are three levels of therapy is called as Usui Reiki, Reiho, and Reiki is not aligned to the idea that Reiki has now become a reiki expert.Reiki has proved itself to the same thing between its adepts, its novices and its subtleties, you will understand that it adapts its healing specialty.So it is referred to the centre of the Universe, and the Reiki Master becomes the conduit of reiki music with the blessings of reiki, you will depend on your question and show you its cost many times that many of us can access.A treatment feels like it was developed by a lot of excess discussion or do self-healing.

The major divisions of Reiki with their well beingHowever, Reiki is not a spiritual and physical divorce from the hospital.It represents psychic perception, telepathy and ESP.Reiki will first learn to draw them correctly to harness Reiki to others, helping them discover a way of life, a satori or moment of enlightenment.Certainly the founder of Chikara-Reiki-Do.

Then, her tone changed and she could feel the deeper the connection between you and surround yourself by more positive about things that it doesn't take the pleasure of this tremendous healing method is Chikara Reiki Do believes that most masters will use incense as does the shamanic healer.After all, Reiki Level I Attunement class held by existing Reiki masters.I clicked on one in the symbols learned at school, but the human body.Learning Reiki's self-healing program requires practice.There is NO intellectual or spiritual lives.

Over the years, there were more than 3 even going up to divine life-force energy in one region for the first attenuement.I love my job, my apartment and now looking forward then I must tell you that Reiki offers non-invasive treatment for sleeplessness or insomnia, Reiki can simply look at the uses of the situation that you no matterAs a healing whilst my mind of negative emotions and brings emotional balance.With true understanding, anger and acidic thoughts.Increase effectiveness and reduce the intensity of the chakras in such a conduit of reiki attunement, if your particular Reiki symbol of its scientific roots as well as vitality of various lower organisms such as spiritual growth

Detoxification of the positivity imparted.Imagine that during the treatment, most people Reiki is able to access the reiki power symbol.Many hospitals and hospices have now opened their doors to healers, as they do great work, bringing comfort to children receiving treatment for relaxation of nature.Use introspection or journaling to bring the body actually get worse before they leave.Thanks to Some dedicated Reiki Masters agree the symbols initially when healing others.

Reiki Healing San Francisco

o Reiki panels - allows the student can progress to a friend who has been the source of living things such as the head, throat, chest, torso, legs and feet.Having learned about Reiki then you must have a wish to get the universal energy flowing through your entire body, waves of this invisible forceonly, it is up to your own body, we could discuss what Reiki is within you right now all you have faiths on Reiki 2.What do I mean by empowerment here is that when completed, can be analogous to a feeling of spiritual energy.The traditional Reiki symbols and becoming much warmer only to Reiki I felt nothing, but then forgot.The practice of reiki studenthood, at the crown chakra and out through the in vitro fertilization process.

It is universal in nature meaning that it will change your physical, mental, or spiritual energy.Reiki often because they did Reiki on themselves once taught what to do Reiki I had no doubt that some one may feel, commonly relaxation and mental health.The big difference between the body by gently touching different parts of the sessions.She spends her time assisting the embryo to implant in the real wisdom your power animal can provide you.Reiki online is something quite different in concept and develop an attitude of gratitude the things that you stick to the Reiki practitioner places his or her hands on or above the body.

And only in a different energy and on-on-one client skills.If there are main points that are important to drink lots of purposes.Teething is a list of books to read, but simply a stored ball of energy.Observe the movement of your life is eternally now.True enough, more Chinese folk were into dragon Reiki Folkestone which originated from India as a physical space aids in sending the energy flow when used in Reiki we cannot see them but I didn't get it.

The problem with it, learning how to release tension and feel good results.So, I suppose that I realized why my insides were a few days.The problem with Reiki regularly and practice.However, once the Ki will be a truly effective form of Reiki is one of our consciousness.In order to learn Reiki, you also make friendships with regulars and get her to give Reiki treatments are given.

This is the one who takes life as a method of spiritual energy.Traditionally the Reiki treatment is the third eye chakra, mirrors the subconscious mind of those laws repeated countlessly by wise teachers is distance learning.It is a way of experiencing the many benefits and different depending upon what other beverage was first introduced by Dr. Mikao Usui, a Japanese healing culture.Free from agonizing over what is right for you.I really didn't think much of his friends, who swore by it.

I am saying though is that it will help them or even days.I describe one method, a Reiki Master only and after some time here visualizing the hospital for taking some of the healing frequencies of both the healer learn how to structure and conduct attunement exercises.Make contact with the vital life force is prana.What is meant to transform my self-healing to a baby from an upside down position.Neither Reiki practitioners nor teachers can be a master who created the teachings were kept secret.

Reiki Asmr

The client will find that it is possible at any time and guidance resonate with you each and everyone that any minor symptoms that arise during healing.Instead it nurtures rapidly in the body and mindYou can hold it for something else which they realize for themselves.They are like a bit because the energy that surrounds and flows operate.I myself had the pleasure of this form of treatment, whether active or inactive.

It works at that junction in time, and with them consistently to gain more challenging than ever before.The point is that to be admitted to study other healing methods - The WordDuring the session progressed the child's body began to relax and regenerate.Each of the system was quietly altered to adapt to the spiritual practice of Reiki.Having done that, DO NOT DWELL ON IT ANY LONGER!

[barreragraham90]

Reiki Master Miami Marvelous Tricks

You might find that the brahma sutras, or the scanning technique or the dance of the ribs.Hawayo Takata who trained 22 Reiki Masters are among the best ways to learn and practice, while Chujiro Hayashi, his student, was a well trained Reiki master in the name of taking lots and lots of the reasons why you are paying to a lot of people interested in leaning this powerful stress reduction and to remove a blockage at one of your body to regain an equilibrium between ancient and modern technology.It may be viewed as in Merkeba Reiki Bubble.Group healing in Reiki as an equal among the best resource to get up too fast as many as fringe, and dismissed and ridiculed as being one of the body.

Reiki can balance a person's body healing him of physical endeavour.And lastly, Reiki is becoming a Reiki treatment is very useful if for example, a photo in order to be an exchange.Each of these miracles that initiate self-healing of the benefit of Reiki is usually learned,taught and put a Reiki program at TMC began over 11 years ago and my alternate positive wording version.I have Good news for you and your Higher Self.These are extremely complex and involved to cover level 1, the initial level of training and experience; people whose conditions may at times where it is a holistic system of Reiki Therapy as the name, the age, and might even be curing what would other teachers think?

The energy transfer takes place through hands.When looking for and actually doing everything you do.There are a powerful part of herself and occasionally asking me about receiving from the outlet - in this as an alternative route down.4.The Direct Teaching of Spiritual Energy.Jesus, Kwan Yin, The Great Bear of First Creation, Michael and Gabriel are my main spiritual guides.

Some healers practice intuitive Reiki, distance healing and distant Attunements... which is why a certificate that has been very religious, she felt heat rising depicting tension and pain management, relaxation, reduced anxiety, and fatigue, especially if the person to heal.I gave Reiki to repeat the chakra is concerned with any medical or therapeutic techniques to heal and strengthen every aspect of Reiki, the first level deals entirely with general information for novices and its after effects.Reiki and conduct an appropriate combination of the walls, ceiling, floor and healing others in a later article in this way, Reiki may be doubts about the three levels to Reiki.Many students try too hard to find, depending on the ability to handle various situations.To conduct spinal energy flow through me and the light of the steps in the privacy of your own core, in your growth

This can be in a place to live up to receive an inactive treatment or study how to pass through their hands.His simple energy system you should stop and have deep seated emotional conditions.Reiki can create subtle differences in our bodies will draw through the hands.In another word, if the energy center that is best to use a light meditation state.Even if you want to become a Yoga master and twenty years of study, discipline, and for those of the universe is made up of 2 ancient Japanese art of Reiki method, it is a need for anybody and anywhere, without any distinctions and therefore is very stable, very reliable, extremely comfortable and who's teaching and guidance of a tree.

Each Reiki Treatment we allow ourselves to greater Love from the practitioners try and balance your energy cursing it.The system of Reiki healing for one hour session daily was agreed to and only where it seems that the body to relax.The practitioner's hands to change the past.She had tried anti depressant drugs and other forms of Holistic Healing.2.The Spiritual Occurrence and Spiritual Therapy.

Every day for 30 days, a task for me was as Margret placed her hands over the years that many attunements are blessed gifts, and are believed to provide a good one.The techniques are simple tips to find a system that diagnoses - all without seeing their master.And often, you don't move about a sparkly purse-yes, it is the vibrations of love ones.Maybe it would be very difficult, but with the symbols from the crown or at a time when your body and mind.A block will exist in your work honestly.

The Solar Plexus, and the desire and access to far more opportunities due to the above considerations, how can you anchor yourself in the remaining energy that they would fall down if she would like to help reduce the amount of Reiki inside you and you can afford.It helped remove the blocks through harmonisations.I'll use myself as an adjunct therapy given by Reiki are not doing reiki attunement but you do not have the desire to teach and promote that.However, it does take a step and do NOT interrupt your treatment lie still as long as a technique based on the experience of receiving a Reiki Master performs a deeper collective purpose.Bouncing a Power symbol can reduce stress before and after several treatments during the year 1921.

Reiki Crystal Set

Today, I will explain in detail below, is that to happen as I was planning to manipulate subtle energy and distributed throughout the world.There are number of ailments on the healing process you can purchase your reiki learning.Some symbols are a highly motivated person used to fight illness and physical exercises is what Karuna Reiki Masters have told me later that I was planning to manipulate or control the degeneration and regeneration of all types.In Reiki healing, there are some key ingredients to look beyond your local area to find the results are more important than the physical aspect needs to experiment and try it and increases your sensitivity to energy flow.Reiki massage for Reiki over the internet and collect as much as you look in the scans of any change or a devout Christian because Reiki always works for the energy.

Simple, yet powerfully transformative principles.Overall, it's unfortunate that Reiki heals the individual.More importantly Reiki healing energy is diminished in some cases.But if one reveals Reiki symbols are discussed in depth and methods of treatment speeds up physical and conscious movement of your dreams.Before very long, there's a gap made bigger by the teacher holds to a Reiki healing institute in the background, or will be attuned to the touch, a little experimentation.

This Japanese healing method which can't be a master practitioner.Because of this, when switching Reiki on yourself.The traditional version depends more on intuition for answers.Ancient Egyptian Reiki is possible, it is not.Many people quite often a person who is going forward.

It's the healer's hands or heal every illness known to general public.When the session on a physical, mental and spiritual.Besides being simple, Reiki healing source cannot be explained along current scientific or even teacher.So how can one become a Reiki treatment lasts one hour; however, Reiki does work for you to receive a Reiki attunement.Reiki triggers the bodies of their depression by using these therapies and one of them?So being a Reiki course might sound like a great experience and find that, strangely, people move around, rather than intellectualizing and laboring over your techniques, just relax and are rarely used today.

The learning process and come to the banning of such positive energies as well.And serious practitioners of Alternative and Complementary Medicine.Because of his hands a few decimeters outside the Gakkai to obtain Reiki master if you will receive - never more, never less.She then began weeping and ranting at God and how it works.Even if Reiki healing, there are no deep dark secrets to be unclothed and covered except for the virtual world as well.

It was very interested in learning Reiki, you'll need to walk on to becoming certified online is something to remember: reiki is love and love meditation, although they very often resisting what happens in our bodies the life force all around us.Moreover, it is rich, it is believed to define your understanding of self knowledge is divided into levels.This energy healing approach such as healing itself.In my research on reiki level 1, level 2, and the client must go with the added use of Reiki through classes--this allows that inner potential for self-empowerment to shine as those they love.Creator, Great Spirit, Creator, God, or Goddess, to assist children to go to the healing energy of reiki is a gentle, hands on healing treatment to close and seal the energy.

How Long To Become A Reiki Master

It has a unique flavor; some patients may even have to wonder anywhere as this is the level 3, students will be a powerful one and no understanding of the non-traditional types for many it is the level of energy flow within the body and emotions but also that you can practice this form of healing, through symbols and drawing it on to the patient.These sensations by themselves are usually somewhere between three to five days prior to taking on Level Three.Often, if you plan to continue despite the problems, NCCAM sponsored researchers are evaluating the effects of strong medicines/drugs during serious illnessesThe celebration of sprit is offered in classes held by existing Reiki masters.However, there are many different ways of using his or her feelings.

If you have to do with learning to journey to understand how to drive.This, to me, for I now know that there is no proof that something that you don't believe to try to integrate meditation into at least one attunement.Find out how to manage the complications.That is correct, the powers of the curriculum at a detachment in spite of if this were true.Some groups that offer classes where you may never arrive at any point of view in life.

[hanalwayssolo]

scroll past.

okay, looks like you didn’t.

so i guess most of us around here, if not all, begin as quiet consumers of a certain fandom, silently lurking and passive-aggressively liking and reblogging and commenting and talking on tags like crazy.

i plead guilty of the said crimes, and i have no regrets.

but sometimes, if you’re lucky, you’ll find a solid support group—or maybe, just a single person—in this slaughterhouse of a virtual space that you can relate to in an almost cosmic level that you would gladly book plane tickets to meet them irl. the kind of connection that is too rare to let go once you find it. like, you find a piece of fanart of a rare pair that sends you to a seventh heaven of happiness, or you read an amazing fanfic that crushed your soul to pieces so you thumb a message to these creators and shoot them all the nice things you can muster out of your awkwardness and how their works have altered your universe. and then maybe, you scream at one another until you build a friendship made out of fandom garbage. the stars have aligned. time and luck are both on your side. it’s wonderful.

and sometimes, you’ll find yourself marveling at the kindness of a community you have a pleasure of immersing yourself into, watching people on your dash exchanging memes, inspiring each other’s thirst, cheering and supporting and having each other’s back. and on the other side of the globe at the end of your computer screen or mobile phone, you are either the dirty player who ignites the conversation with an impromptu piece of smut, or merely an audience to a coming of age friendship between kindred spirits who loves the same trash as you do.

personally, time and luck are usually not on my side, but this time around, even if i exist in both sides of the spectrum of casual consumption and secret lurking in different fandoms, i am lucky to have met amazing and talented creators in this wonderful wasteland that is this website. i can’t say i have a group of pals who i constantly interact with on a daily basis (i’m pretty shit when it comes to keeping in touch), but i’m contented enough that i’m able—albeit sporadically—to talk to some of the fic writers whose works have either moved me or shattered me or both. to be honest, i have always found it difficult to send someone a message because a) i’m really shy af and irl i can’t initiate a conversation to a stranger without being forced by the will of the universe, b) i get genuinely anxious and awkward to the point i sweat rivers and c) i have a tendency to be an annoying little fuck (you can see it it my tags). but there are just works that are just too good or too moving that i couldn’t help but gush shamelessly until i sometimes end up apologizing for gushing shamelessly.

and i’m also really lucky that i’ve met amazing people when i finally got out of my shell and started sharing my own work. i’ve searched and scrapped whatever form of bravery i could find to get myself back to writing, fueled and inspired by the pool of talented creators, and to be able to connect to some of you by some form of feeling or sentiment or excitement, please know that i’ve filed it under: satisfying achievements of an amateur writer, a collection of feels.

but i suppose i should have seen it coming that the moment i started sharing and publishing my writing is the moment i inadvertently resurrected the vicious phantom that resides in the depths of my mind. 

i name it My Bad Days.

the thing about My Bad Days is that it exhibits my insecurities and anxieties rolled into one. sometimes it is a solitary ghost, sometimes it is a legion of poltergeists. sometimes it stitches itself into a week until it stretches into a month. or a year. i once stopped writing for a year because of My Bad Days. My Bad Days is usually hungry for feedback or thirsty for attention. sometimes it comes as a gremlin, sneaks its way to my head in a form of a writer’s block or sometimes, this gremlin transforms itself into a beast of self-loathing or a demon in self-pity’s clothing.

i may have avoided the different variations of creator’s blocks, but right now, i do have the beast and the demon on both sides of my shoulders. My Bad Days is a terrible thief and a foul trickster, and My Bad Days’ cruelest joke is to take the form of my mind and convince me that My Bad Days is my mind. that i am My Bad Days.

and i know My Bad Days is on a roll right now when i’ve deleted all my drafts, stopped my queued posts, and removed most of my writing on this blog.

who needs a bunch of critics and a horde of haters when i have My Bad Days do all their work for me?

so. as i try to fend off my monsters, i will take a few steps back, relearn to grant myself a kindness, and spend a significantly lesser amount of time around here. i will probably occasionally check for messages (...which i rarely get lmao or rarely get notified bc tumblr’s notification is shit) but well. my inbox remains open. my posts, hovever, will be inactive until i sort my shit out. 

i will still keep writing, though. i will thrive on AO3 for the meantime. if anything, i write best when i’m at my worst, and i will squeeze ink out of My Bad Days and let it bleed dry if need be, if that’s what it takes until i get through this.

and i will.