#i made like a few but it's not my area of expertise lmao

[bloodyrib]

terrifier gif makers thank you for your service 🫡

[ddollipop]

THINK I WANNA FEEL LOVE. . . ! — ( THOMA. )

#. synopsis! — when ayato allows visiting nobles from other nations to stay at the kamisato estate, thoma finds himself very interested in one young woman in particular .

#. contains! — f!reader , explicitly nsfw content , oral sex , cunnilingus , cum swallowing , multiple positions , vaginal fingering , vaginal sex , thoma's a pervert , panty sniffing , caught masturbating , virginity , explicit first time sex , frequent usage of endearment terms (baby/angel) , vanilla sex , praise , thoma is really sweet .

#. word count! — 4.2k .

#. a/n! — happy kinktober, sluts ! let's see how many times i post this year, trying to break my previous year's record of three lmao (with one being three days late smh) .

If you ask about Thoma throughout Inazuma, you’ll likely get similar replies. They’ll comment on his willingness to help others, to be of service to those in need. Many will commonly note that he’s a hard worker, a diligent young man who loathes leaving any task incomplete. You might even hear that he’s a prime candidate for many young women in terms of romantic interest, —that he’s easy on the eyes and gentlemanly to boot. Such praise from not only the general public, but even the likes of Kamisato Ayato and Ayaka themselves, left you truly believing that you were in good hands with him.

Which. . . Is still accurate, you suppose; just not in the way you expected.

Coming from a sizable line of nobility, you were cordially invited to attend a week-long summit in Inazuma to discuss international relations between all the nations. Though it wasn’t quite your area of expertise, you readily accepted the offer and studied dutifully in order to make a positive impression. The Yashiro Commissioner was also kind enough to allow guests of high importance (of which you were apparently one) to board in the Kamisato estate for the duration of your stay.

Thus, their dearest housekeeper became yours for the week; in more ways than one. Just as the rumors had declared, —Thoma was warm, kind, and none too unattractive. He helped you carry your bags to the room you’d be staying in and made it clear that if you needed anything at all, you could come to him for help. You thanked him, but didn’t really expect to take him up on that. After all, you were quite used to taking care of most things yourself, and that background of independence and task-juggling has all but prepared you for the very worst.

Thoma was an unexpected storm though; —one you hadn’t a clue how to weather.

The meeting for the third day was pushed back a few hours due to a holdup of cargo ships blocking the entrance to Inazuma. Many of the needed officials were busy trying to sort through the mess of it all, and others were aboard the ships stuck in the harbor, unable to leave until the others had cleared off. When word of the delay reached you, you were the first one out the door, well on your way back to the Kamisato estate. The two prior gatherings had taken a lot out of you, and while it was clear that your studying had served you more than well, the social aspect was quite draining. Moreover, a few extra hours of rest before diving into the next one was hardly a sour idea.

It seemed that everyone else was using their time differently. You were met with a sea of empty rooms, not a single soul in sight as you made your way down the long hall. Halfway to your temporary space, however, you caught wind of soft, muffled sounds coming from your room through the ever-so-slightly cracked sliding door. Your footsteps became much lighter as you approached, peeking in through the small gap to see what was going on.

Your jaw dropped and you were hardly able to contain the gasp that nearly erupted from the back of your throat. Thoma was in your room, clothed back pressed against the wall, your worn panties from the day before stuffed against his face. You could hear him taking long, deep breaths, savoring the scent of your day-old musk. His half-hard cock rested in his hand, offering slow strokes to himself as he reveled in the aroma of your used, unwashed underwear.

Reflexively, you felt prickles of disgust stab at your innocent heart. Having been raised a noble, you were well beyond sheltered in many ways, and this was the first time you’d ever seen something so phallic in person. But you couldn’t deny the warmth spreading along your core, nor the way your pussy clenched ever so slightly at the sight of it all. Thoma was fairly long and certainly not lacking in girth. His lithe fingers encircled himself, sliding along his member with exactly the kind of precision you would expect from an experienced housekeeper.

In your haze of confusion, you let instinct take over, allowing your hand to travel between your thighs. Through your layered dress (proper attire for the important meeting you were supposed to be attending) you rubbed little circles against yourself, getting little jolts of friction that managed to hit just right in spite of the material in your way. Thoma kept his eyes closed, likely to focus his senses on the panties just a few strokes away from being stuffed in his jowls.

You watched from the hall as he stroked himself to the thin garment, thumb grazing the ever-reddening tip of his cock.

“Fuck, y/n.”

The sound of your name falling from his lips leaves your hand freezing in place, breath hitching in your throat as if you were the “bad guy” in this situation. You certainly weren’t the one doing the most wrong here, but the thought of Thoma (or anyone else, for that matter) catching you in such a shameful position. . . It was utterly humiliating.

With his eyes still closed, hand still pumping along his shaft in slow, deliberate flicks, you came to the conclusion that he hadn’t seen you and was simply. . . Fantasizing?

Still feeling largely conflicted, your hand returned to your side and you were set on just walking away and pretending that this had never happened. You figured it was the best course of action to avoid any confrontation, leave things as they had been, and return home soon enough. That is, until one wrong move left a creaky board just outside the sliding door ringing out, to which Thoma’s eyes abruptly shot open in panic. He could see your wide eyes and the soft lavender color of the dress you’d been donning as he saw you out not even two hours prior through the slim crack in the door. 

“My Lady, I—” he cut himself off, your panties falling ungracefully from his hand to the floor at his feet.

Thoma stuffed his hardened cock into his pants, a harsh blush present on his cheeks as he sought to straighten his back and apologize for defiling your space.

“I-I’m sorry,” you said reflexively, backing away from the door, “I didn’t mean to watch, I just—”

The words die in your throat. You don’t know how to finish that sentence, and you fear anything you could have uttered would have just made the situation that much more contentious. 

He pauses, his chest still heaving a bit. Shame crackles in his gut, but he couldn’t help but to take particular interest in the latter half of your apology. The same hand he’d been jacking himself off with reaches out, pulling the door further off to the side. 

“You. . . Were watching?” Thoma asks, a small glint of hope flashing through his shamrock eyes. 

Your heart hammers now, pounding against your chest like a drum. Though there’s distance between yourself and him, you wonder if he can hear it from where he stands.

“Not long,” you attempt to assure him, not quite catching the subtle implications he was throwing your way. “I just couldn’t help myself.”

“You understand, then,” his tone lowers as he reaches out to take your wrist into his grip, —the same grip that held your panties to his face mere moments prior. “You understand that. . . That sometimes it’s just too easy to come undone.”

“I. . .” you hesitate, but finish anyway: “I suppose I do.”

“Come a little closer,” he beckons, giving your arm a soft pull toward him.

You’ve no reason to really be distrustful of him, so you take a few tentative steps forward, all but melting into his embrace. Now standing in the guest room, Thoma slides the door shut (fully, this time) before putting all of his attention on you.

“You’re so beautiful,” he tells you, cupping your heated cheek in his warm hand. “Since I first saw you, I haven’t been able to get you off my mind.”

Thoma pushes your hair back and away from your neck, baring it for his access, leaning in closer to whisper in your ear.

“Can I kiss you?”

Soft tufts of heated air ghost against your skin. A shaky breath passes your lips. You’re nervous, but Thoma. . . He’s been nothing but kind to you, and after what you just saw of him, it’s hard to deny that you’re attracted. All at once, he feels like some semblance of your home whilst you’re so far away, yet he reminds you just as equally of unexplored lands that you’ve never set foot on. He’s tantalizing. 

You nod.

His kiss is enough to steal the air from your lungs, starting off slow and deliberate. The little noises you make stir the lustful beast that creeps just beneath his charming exterior. His lips are soft and maybe even delicate as they gradually become hungrier, finally drawing down your chin and sliding along your open jaw. The gentle hand on your cheek takes its place on your hip now as his mouth explores your neck. Quickly enough, you melt into him, —muscles loosening as you allow him to have his way. 

"Here," he whispers, quickly leading you over to the futon mattress that sits on the floor.

Thoma's nimble fingers travel around your back, pulling at certain ribbons here and there to loosen the waist of your dress. As it comes undone, the sleeves begin to slump off your shoulders, and he cranes his neck down to pepper some more kisses along the newly bared skin.

"If it's too much, just say so," he notes, all the while helping you slip out of your formal attire.

As expected of someone in his line of work, he's meticulous about not damaging the garment. No tearing, no pulling, no unnecessary theatrics, —just undressing you like a gentleman before setting your clothes aside. He even helped to maintain your balance as you stepped out of it.

"Lay back," he prompts, quickly adding, "—make yourself comfortable."

You do, resting your head atop one of the newly fluffed pillows while Thoma strips himself down to his tight-fitting boxers. It's hard not to stare at the prominent outline of his bulge, and you sink your teeth into your bottom lip as if to sober yourself up, forcing your gaze back up to meet his eyes sheepishly. If he noticed the hunger, he didn’t mention it, but you’re sure he can feel the static in the air between him and yourself as it snaps and crackles like a roaring fire. 

He kneels at your feet, each of you clad only in undergarments. His hands rest against your knees, then slide down the tops of your thighs in tandem. When he extends forward, you spread them, allowing him to slit himself in the open space.

"You're stunning," he compliments, "I haven't been able to stop staring at you since I first saw you. Everything about you is so gorgeous, —it makes it so hard to control myself around you."

Thoma lays it on thick enough to drown in. Though your breathing hitches a bit in your throat, his words fill you with enough confidence to raise yourself off the futon and slink your arms around his neck. The kiss that follows is deep, accompanied by his hands fondling your chest through the fabric of your bra. Each of you is quick to decide the material is an annoyance for the moment, and it's gone not long after. He loves the way your sensitive nipples perk up at the first touch of open air, —then further relishes in the little gasp you let out as he takes one into his mouth, tongue flicking it over. He laps at it until he tires, leaving a sheen of his spit in his wake, before moving over to the other and repeating the process once more. It's the first time any man has ever touched you like this, and you think to yourself that you're glad it's someone so considerate and thorough such as Thoma.

He continues to mumble little words of praise as he kisses down your sternum, —gorgeous, once, beautiful, twice, stunning, thrice. His tongue lolls out around your naval, leaving a thin trail of saliva behind until his mouth rests at the top of your panties. Though he hooks two fingers, one on either side, just below the lacy fabric, he doesn't pull just yet. Instead, he rests the flat of his tongue against your panties, letting his spit seep into the material. You can feel the warmth of his mouth through the fabric, and it's driving you wild. He pulls ever so slightly at the garment, but stops just short of pulling it off, instead lapping at your lips through the material in long, deliberate strokes.

"Ah, Thoma," you vocalize, left hand coming up to softly rest over your mouth.

He pauses for a moment to let you know how much he likes it when you say his name like that. You don’t catch the full sentence through the newfound adrenaline rush, but it’s something about how pretty his name sounds when it comes from you.

Thoma takes a hand from your thigh and presses the tip of his middle finger against the wet stripe along your panties, a mixture of his spit and your arousal, rubbing at the slickness. Your mind is swimming. This is all so new, and it feels distinctly different to the times you’ve sat in your bedroom swirling your fingers around on your clit, leaking onto pristine sheets in the late hours of the night.

Another pause, but this time he decides to tug at your underwear, encouraging you to lift your hips so he can do away with them for the time being. You’re almost embarrassed by how quickly you react, but it’s hard to be ashamed of anything when Thoma seems so delighted to just be there between your legs. He tosses the last of your clothing to the side, kissing the top of your foot, then up your calf, along your inner thighs, and finally he lets his tongue fall past his lips to split yours apart.

It’s good enough to make your toes curl on instinct, the way he laps like a thirsty animal quenching himself with the folds of your pussy. You gasp at the feeling, swallowing a full moan. He drinks you in like nectar and it’s enough to make you dizzy. 

You feel one of his fingers prod inside you, just barely, pausing to give you time to tell him to stop if that’s what you really want. —It’s not, so after a few moments, he lays his tongue flat against your clit and lets one of his long, slim fingers sink inside you until the base of his hand presses against you as well.

“Feel good, baby?” He inquires, glancing up at you from between your thighs.

“Yeah,” you answer breathily, moving the hand over your mouth down to your breast, clutching at the flesh and feeling his leftover saliva squelch against your skin. “Feels good.”

He hums in acknowledgement, and you feel the vibration in your core. A whine escapes you when he pushes another finger inside just as tenderly as before, letting you adjust before sinking all the way to the palm. He holds your hip a little roughly when he begins pumping his digits in and out, starting off slower to avoid any discomfort on your part.

“You’re so pretty,” he compliments. “It’s all I’ve thought about since you arrived. . . How stunning you are, how good you must taste. . .”

Under any other circumstances, you’d have been burning up from the sheer weight of his praise alone, but as things stand, you fear it’s nigh impossible to be any hotter than you already are in this moment. Your brain isn’t working fast enough to muster up a reply, so you resign yourself to whining at his touch, hoping that will speak for you.

And does it ever. Thoma can practically feel himself throbbing at the noises you’re making. He loves every little sound, relishes in the bliss of having you clench around his fingers, buried so deep in your snatch that his fingers are drowning in your heat.

He watches carefully as your hands clutch at the fabric of the futon in the guest room, feeling your thighs quivery around his body.

“Close?” He inquires.

He doesn’t really get a response, per say, but your back arches a little, pressing yourself harder into his fingers, and that says just about all he needs to know. His tongue returns to your clit, lapping at it again, pushing you closer and closer to the edge until you’re left cumming on his fingers and against his mouth. He slows down as you sink your teeth into your own wrist, huffing through the orgasm.

There’s an empty sort of feeling by the time he pulls his digits out, sitting more upright to wipe the mixture of his spit and your arousal from his lips with his forearm. His mind is screaming by now, all things he wants to say, but isn’t sure how to put into words. You’re so stunning like this, that sheen of pure bliss emanating from every pour, —that starry-eyed look in your stare. He loves the way you’ve retained a little sense of humility from it all, but not enough to cover yourself up. He loves the way your wrist keeps the bitemarks of your teeth like a trophy when you let it fall away from your mouth.

The thought of asking you to suck him off crosses his mind, but the moment he looks between your thighs and sees the pretty wetness there, he decides against it.

“C’mere, angel,” he mumbles, encouraging you to sit up and gain your bearings in his arms.

You do, and he’s so gentle in the way he holds you, like he thinks you’re made of something fragile enough to break apart at a moment’s notice. He presses a few off-handed kisses to your temple, then grabs your bitten wrist and kisses there too, as if trying to soothe the dull ache you’d inflicted upon yourself.

You’re not sure what to say, so you say nothing, but Thoma doesn’t seem to mind the silence. He fills it with little gestures of affection, —brushing hair from your eyes, presses soft kisses to your forehead and your lips.

“First time?” He inquires, just guessing from your initial shock and the way it all seemed so novel to you. (Plus your noble status, as those from high-class bloodlines were known for their tendency to keep their children quite sheltered.)

You nod in reply, seeming sheepish about it, but he gives you a reassuring smile.

“I’m honored,” he says, and you get the sense that he really means it. 

“We don’t have to do anything else,” he adds. “Please don’t feel pressured.”

It’s then that you give the possibilities some real, clear, rational thought. When you return home in just a few day’s time, it’s unlikely you’ll have an opportunity like this again for quite some time. Moreover, there’s something so endearing about Thoma, especially like this, that has you itching for more. So you swallow, gathering the courage to crane your neck up and kiss him. He seems a little startled by the sudden boldness, but kisses back just as readily, placing a hand on the back of your head.

“I want to,” you tell him, whispering the words against his lips.

And who is he to deny you what you want?

He tugs his boxers off then moves to lie back, thinking it best to let you start the pace. He helps you straddle him, a knee on either side, your cunt hovering just above his length. There’s a jolt of something close to electricity through your veins as the head of his cock brushes against your clit, and you take a sharp breath in. It feels really vulnerable, this position, Thoma’s hands on your hips, holding you steady as his eyes roam over every inch of you that’s on display for him. You know he’s not judging, but it’s new, and you avoid his gaze on purpose as you do your best to line him up efficiently between your thighs.

He bites his lip to stop himself from smiling, not wanting to be mistaken for laughing at you in such an unguarded position. Thoma just thinks you’re cute, the way your hands tremble a little as you work to get him inside. Just the tip, and you gasp a little, so he releases the lip between his teeth and tightens the grasp on your body.

“Easy,” he murmurs, “take your time, baby.”

“Sorry,” you utter like a reflex, though you’re not even sure what you’re even apologizing for in the first place.

You sink down a little further, feeling more of him enter, and it makes you gasp. With your hands on his chest, he can feel the way your arms are starting to shake, so he coaxes you forward and wraps his arms around your back.

“Don’t say sorry,” he mumbles, holding you securly. “Take it slow, there’s no rush.”

It’s several moments before you move again, taking him in until he bottoms out, and you gasp again, this time against the skin of his neck. It doesn’t hurt so much as it’s just new and slightly uncomfortable at first go, a little too full in comparison to everything else you’ve ever had. He lets you adjust, drawing shapes along your bare shoulders, whispering compliments and encouragement. 

“That’s it, baby,” he says softly, “just like that.”

There’s a little seed of pride that sprouts the moment you hear his breathing hitch in his throat. It tells you that you’re doing something right here at the very least, and you let his hands guide your movements, starting off slower before speeding up slightly and feeling his fingers dig into the plush skin of your ass. You swallow down a few moans, letting one of your hands travel to his head, tugging at his hair.

“That’s it,” he drawls, “that’s my girl, just like that, —fuck.”

It’s almost startling to hear that word fall from Thoma’s lips again, but you’re a little too blissed out to be surprised. Instead, you give up on the idea of choking back your moans and let them spill past your lips, —breath ghosting against his neck where you’ve buried your face in the crook. He tests the waters, jolting up to meet your riding, making your grip on his strawberry blond strands tighten in the process.

“Thoma,” you choke out desperately, causing a grin to etch its way onto his pretty face, “—please.”

He’s not sure how he knew what that please really meant, but he just did. Thus he switches the position at your discretion and takes his place between his legs again, lining the tip of his cock up just right, then letting it dip inside. Somehow, it feels better in this position than it did in the previous one, and he watches with ample interest as you take your bottom lip between your teeth nearly roughly enough to draw blood as your eyes roll back a ways.

There’s something alluring about the way he moans above you, like he’s getting drunk on this feeling, on this time he’s spending buried deeply enough inside you to feel your walls pulling him in as if every part of you is as desperate for him as he is for you. It feels good to be wanted, he realizes, and even better to be wanted by you.

He slides in and out, eventually establishing a pace that feels good for the both of you, —nothing rough, but not quite soft, either. It’s somewhere in the middle, with just enough enticement to push your novice body to new heights without overwhelming your sensibilities. Through it all, he’s as gentlemanly as everyone told you he was, watching your movements like a hawk, attentive of your every whimper.

When he goes deeper and gets a little sloppy, you’re far enough along for it to not make much of a difference. He’s nearing the edge of a precipice when the knot in your gut comes undone, and you cum on his cock, clenching down on him. He spares a few more thrusts in before slipping himself out and leaning back to jack himself off to a finish.

Before he can do so by himself, you’ve moved through the haze of your orgasm to wrap your lips around him. You’re not quite sure what came over you, but in the moment, it felt so right that you couldn’t back down by the time he was stuffed down your throat. He really didn’t mean to be so rough with you, but he was so close to the high he’d been desperately searching for in your cunt that your mouth served as a pristine replacement.

“P-Pull off a bit, baby,” he says quickly, —having enough restraint to avoid pumping a load directly down your gullet.

You pull away, but keep the tip in your mouth, feeling him twitch against your tongue. The taste of his cum is a little bitter, but it’s warm, and you stay attached to him while he catches his breath. The hand on your head falls away, and he reaches for the hankerchief he always carries in his pocket to give you something to spit into.

His face falls a little when he goes to hand it to you and watches you swallow instead.

[bellshazes]

@nydescynt replied to your post “Ive known this for a while but after an 11 hour in...”:

Is the topic/function to provide a guide to actual existing systems of care, a more theoretical/skills oriented guide for generally receiving/providing help regardless of system, or.. a third topic I'm not thinking of? That sounds. Really helpful, but also an insane amount of work

​it would be somewhat modeled after my art made easy series - a series of ???? posts ????? or whatever medium with the intent of enabling anyone who comes across it to begin to identify components of the system of care, social determinants of health etc. in their own communities. in order to do this, I'd need broad and specific expertise across all core areas, which off the top of my head are:

education, k-12 and university/technical/secondary systems - emphasis on educational rights of students and families

judicial systems - juvenile and adult, courts, judges, bar associations, etc.

residential treatment centers - psychiatric, group home, foster, physical health inpatient, nursing homes, specialty placements (e.g. ED treatment centers, which there are few of in the US lmao)

non-residential mental health institutions - outpatient treatment centers,

medicare, medicaid, and commercial health insurance - benefits, how to know what to get, how you qualify, age restrictions, VABs, case management, inquiry coordinators, incentive programs, what is HEDIS/NCQA/quality metrics

actually quality improvement, PIPs, and other metrics should get their own thing but that's like 201

evidence based and best practice modalities AND their limitations in the context of systems-level thinking

advocacy - both self-advocacy programs, independent living, historical context AND collective advocacy organizations, how to evaluate nonprofits and for-profit community organizations, common types of orgs, how to locate them, national-level resources with state chapters (e.g. Kids Count, CASA, so on)

critical pedagogy and dialectical approaches to collaboration, emphasis on co-learning and sustainable ground-up coalition building

policymaking and lobbying

specific conditions from the perspective of SDOH/health equity - not primers on NAS/SEI or SUD or autism or whatever but how to know your blind spots and what blind spots are critical in different contexts

child welfare entities including state departments, especially the difference between CPS and what in my state we call DCBS (who actually administer placements, foster caregivers, adoption)

types of family placements

the fact that 64% of removals in the US (>130k) as of 2020 were due to neglect, the most preventable of conditions; the need to eliminate statutes that allow removal of children from families due to poverty or homelessness in every single state or at the federal level

medical provider payment structures that can incentivize whole-person quality of care and why that's so fucking hard to make happen especially within medicaid

there's like twelve more but that's the freshest ones. and that's more for me to know better than i currently do; the framing would likely start very simply around something like:

How to consciously identify system of care and SDOH components in your own life

How to identify causes or areas in your own community you care most about

How to find and join up with existing efforts in the causes near and dear to you

Follow up on how to live collective action if directly working with existing orgs isn't an option - example, what people in your life are doing good work and how can you support them?

Highlighting very small-team, high-impact groups like Beargrass Thunder's alley gallery projects here in Louisville that take (in the grand scale of things) very little to do transformative work

Language primers

That alone is a tall order, but I think I could do it. And crucially I (feel like I ethically and professionally) need to know everything about every state, but not necessarily all at once. It will be the work of a lifetime, but I don't know that I can not do it, you know?

[saintmouthed]

dtcfdp chapter 3 (author commentary)

I fear it is time to Reread dtcfdp Again and I'm going to be so annoying about it, actually. Anyway I'm gonna basically reread my own fic and liveblog the experience. Chapter 3 commentary starts under the cut!

chapter 1 commentary here

chapter 2 commentary here

"It wasn’t until he got out of the shower that he realized somehow he’d made it home with Ange’s jacket."

Right off the bat this made me smile so big. Yes... his jacket... I had NO motivation to have R take Enjolras's jacket... none at all

Hey, sweetheart, how are you feeling today? Ange.

oh my OWN heart jumped at sweetheart this time around.

That sounds like something someone just trying to make me feel better would say. R. I wouldn’t lie to you, I’m being honest. But, is it working? Ange. Grantaire thinks about this. A little. R.

they make me SICK (in the best way)

“What, you think I don’t have a key to this place?” That’s not something that had ever occurred to Grantaire. “Oh.” He says, after a thoughtful moment. Éponine laughs at him. “Bossuet let me in before he went to class, dipshit.”

LMAO this is so fucking funny I completely forgot about this. I don't reread this chapter often so this is like experiencing a whole new fic. Though I don't remember why I don't reread this chapter often? Is it the trivia one? that might be why. More on that later if it is the trivia one.

“Well…” Joly, at least, looks a little abashed. “It might have been…Enjolras?” “Enjolras?” Éponine gasps, before bursting into laughter. “Are you fucking kidding?” God, Grantaire is completely lost. “You know this guy?” “Yeah.” She waves a dismissive hand, as if he has any idea what she’s talking about. “We’ve met, obviously, and I went to a few meetings. Joly, are you serious?”

HOW DID I FORGET ABOUT THIS ADFASDFJ... "are you fucking kidding" it was so funny having everyone be like 'oh yeah grantaire you'd HATE enjolras' meanwhile grantaire is already sickening in love with him

OH MY GOD IT'S THE ROPE BITE NIGHT CHAPTER...

if you haven't read the Enjolras ficlet I wrote for this one or the Jehan ficlet... you should

aw... Grantaire learning to tie a futomomo... me too buddy

Ange rolls his eyes. “I trust you haven’t traumatized one of our newest members yet, Jehan?” “I leave frightening the newbies to you, my dear, that’s usually your area of expertise.” Grantaire wonders which one of them picked up the casual pet names first.

I'm OBSESSED WITH THEM

wow props to past me for writing that rope demo so beautifully damn

oh god... it IS the trivia one

I've seen the rope twist one before IRL it IS mean

CHEERS I DO LOVE A ZIPPER THOUGH

“How would you drop a raw egg from a height onto a concrete floor without cracking it?” Ange asks, blithely ignoring R’s commentary. “You…can’t?” “It takes more than an egg to crack a concrete floor, darling.”

an anon sent me this one back in the day!!! I love this... and I loved reading about the first zipper getting ripped off tbh.

the thing I don't like about the trivia chapter is that it's another of those threads I never followed through bc there was simply SO MUCH going on in this fic. And the Gutenberg question makes me cringe, but that's another story LMAO.

THE ROPE AS A FLOGGER WHO CHEERED. I saw this in a video once and it made me feel insane.

Grantaire either A. shrieks or B. blacks out (though there is that last possibility C. which is both)

Real as fuck grantaire

WAIT FUCK IS THIS THE PHONE NUMBER everybody hang on

FUCK

IT IS

freddyfromnicarlycheering.gif

“It’s…” Ange hesitates on the last character, felt tip of the pen stilling on Grantaire’s skin for a brief moment before he follows through. “My phone number.”

OH MY GOD

“I mean, it’s—it’s still nothing. I mean, not nothing, it’s definitely, uh, something.”

sure is !!!

this chapter was good actually idk why I tend to skip it

[drabbles-mc]

Help Wanted

Juice Ortiz x F!Reader

Request by Anon: Ok. To go off of you SOA post about the guys taking care of a dog. I love the idea of them running a doggy daycare (maybe after Jax is prez) as part of their “legitimate business l endeavors. Would you be interested in writing something like that? It seems so comical & fluffy at the same time! Maybe throw in a Juice/reader love story, like she gets a job working there and she has dog experience that those “big bad bikers” don’t lol. Cue dog whisperer & Juice being all heart eyes 😍

Warnings: 18+, language

Word Count: 7.8k (idk what happened please don’t ask)

A/N: I won’t lie, the fic that I intended to write for this request is not what ended up happening. Idk where the hard left turn happened but I’m not upset about it! I hope you enjoy where this all went. All I know is that I hope that Juice and reader have a life full of happiness and puppies together. Also I love Jax in this because he’s such a goddamn nudge lmao

SOA Taglist: @garbinge @masterlistforimagines @espieviolet99 @mijop​ @chibsytelford​ @thanossexual​ @xladymacbethx​ @i-just-read-stuff​ @bport76​ @toni9​ @unicornucopia-fuckers​ @buckybarneshairpullingkink​ @shadow-of-wonder​ @punkgoddess-98​ @paintballkid711​ @black-repunzel99​ @lexondeck​ @jitterbugs927​ @fanfic-n-tabulous​ @mijagif​ @frattsparty​ @winchestershiresauce​ @bellisperennis0​ @crowfootwrites​ @redpoodlern​ @beardburnsupersoldiers​ @mveggieburger​ @xeniarocks​ @choochoo284​ @littlekittymeow​ @withmyteeth​ @beardsanddetectives​ @juicyortiz​ @bruxasolta​ @i-love-scott-mccall​ @be-my-dear​ @passionatewrites​ (If you want to be added to any of my taglists, let me know!)

“I don’t know why you guys thought this was a good idea,” Juice shook his head as he pored over the paperwork spread out on the table in front of him.

Tig rolled his eyes, scratching behind the ears of the dog in his lap, “Because it’s dogs, man. Can’t go wrong with dogs.”

Juice looked up from his laptop screen, “But we know nothing about running a business like this.”

“We don’t have to. That’s what we hire other people for,” Tig reached, slapping Jax lightly on the chest, “Right?”

Jax chuckled, nodding because he knew that he’d lost this argument against Tig and Happy the second that it got brought to the table, “Right.”

Juice huffed out a sigh as he dove back into everything that was in front of him. It wasn’t the idea that he had a problem with. A Sons-sponsored doggy daycare sounded exactly like something that would get set up in Charming. It was a bit ridiculous, but it could work out just fine and be a perfectly good new way to make money. People spend ridiculous amounts of money on their pets, a point that Happy had made less eloquently when the idea first got brought up in church. The idea wasn’t the problem. Executing the idea was where they were going to run into a bit of a mess. Everything else that they got involved in, they already had people lined up to run it and keep things going smoothly. Not this. This was just a pipe dream that Jax wasn’t looking to deny anyone. And yet somehow Juice was the one left scrambling to put it all together.

“You guys gonna help me with any of this?” Juice asked, “Or are you just gonna sit around and watch me work?”

Jax stood up off the couch with a laugh, walking over and clapping Juice on the shoulder as he walked by, “You’re the brains behind this one, bro. You’ll be able to handle it just fine.”

Juice wasn’t in the mood to get in an argument about it, so he let Jax walk away without another word. He knew, though, that despite Tig and Happy being the ones who brought it up, they weren’t going to be doing any of the legwork in getting it all started. That wasn’t their area of expertise. It wasn’t Juice’s either, truth be told, but it looked like it was going to have to be.

They already had the space. The club had bought up a few properties along the way and one of them actually had a decent amount of yard space in the back. They threw a decent fence up and Juice had found a crew of guys to help transform the inside of the building to make it more dog-friendly. The cosmetic stuff was easy enough, but hiring people, figuring out how to run the day-to-day of it all while they were still getting it off the ground, that was going to be the hard part.

“What would the requirements for this even be?” this wasn’t the type of job posting that the club was usually putting out there, and Juice had no idea what to put. He buried his face in his hands, wishing that he could pawn this off onto someone else and be done with it but he was too invested now—he’d put too much work into it. He was halfway tempted to write, “Must be nice to animals” and call it a day just so he could get it over with and try to move on to the next thing.

There was a knock on the glass front door moments before the sound of it sliding over the welcome mat filled the room. Juice lifted his head, confusion flooding over his features as he took in the sight of you. You looked around the room, looking just about as confused as he did, and he couldn’t help but to wonder if you were lost.

“All good?” he asked.

You looked over at him, letting out a nervous laugh, “Yea, uh, hi. Sorry. I just,” you gestured over your shoulder, “I saw the help wanted sign in the window. From the name I thought this place was a doggy daycare. But it looks…well…” you laughed, “empty.”

Juice laughed, getting up from where he was sitting behind the reception desk, “Yea. We, um, we haven’t opened yet. Figured we might need some employees first,” he chuckled as he held his hand out, “I’m Juice, by the way.”

You shook his hand, “Juice?”

“Yea,” there was something about the way your eyes seemed to be searching his that made him nervous, “That’s what my friends…I mean they just, uh, you can call me Juan, if you want.”

You smiled, “Juan?”

“Juan Carlos,” he chuckled, trying not to let his nerves come out to play in a situation where they had no right to be there.

“Nice to meet you, Juan Carlos,” you gave him your name in turn before taking another look around what was currently a large, empty, undecorated space, “So, you said you’re looking for employees?”

“Yea. Are you, um, are you looking for a job?”

You laughed, nodding, “I guess you could say that, yea.”

“Got any experience with this kind of stuff?”

You shrugged, “Yea. I mean, I never ran a business for it or anything. But back home and through college I used to dog-sit and walk people’s dogs as a side-gig. Never had any complaints,” you smiled, “I can whip up some references for you if you want.”

���I know I should ask for them, but I won’t lie to you, I’m kind of in a pinch here,” he took a breath, running his hand back over his head until it rested on the back of his neck, “When can you start?”

“Whenever you get some dogs in here for me to take care of,” you laughed.

He smiled, for some reason feeling a sense of relief washing over him despite the fact that you were just one person, and there was no guarantee that it was all going to work out. For all he knew, you were going to see what a mess he was and how quickly he was pulling together the entire operation and you’d bail. He just had to hope that that wouldn’t be the case. You seemed nice, though, and he just had to hope that that would be enough.

The two of you chatted for a couple minutes. You asked about the plans for the place, what the end-goal was. You could tell by the way that he was talking that he was in over his head, and it made you wonder how he ended up in this position anyway. He was trying, you could tell by all the papers spread out in some sort of organized chaos on the desk. He also had the look of a person who hadn’t gotten enough sleep in a very long time.

You also noticed the kutte he was wearing. Charming was a new place for you, and you didn’t really know all the history and what there was to know about it. But you’d seen enough men around town with the same vest on to know that it must’ve been connected somehow to the building you were standing in, the business that this man was attempting to get off the ground. It should’ve been a deterrent, you should’ve just turned around and walked back out. But you didn’t. Something about his exasperation and confusion made him seem so trustworthy.

“If you don’t mind me saying,” you offered a sympathetic smile, “you seem a little in over your head here.”

He laughed, nodding, “Thanks for putting it nicely.”

You chuckled, “I won’t pretend that I have all the answers, but if you want some help getting this place going, I’ll do what I can. If nothing else, I’m coachable.”

“Yea?” he looked hopeful.

“Yea. And if you give me your budget I can, um,” you looked around the room, “I can get some stuff that’ll make this place look a little more inviting.”

“I’ll take any help I can get. You got any friends who would be interested?” he let out a laugh.

You shook your head, smiling, “If I had any friends here, I’d see what I could do. But it’s just me, unfortunately.”

His lips started to curl into a smile, “Not unfortunate,” he paused, “Look, I know you probably stopped in here on a whim. I’m not gonna try to rope you in for the rest of the day when you probably have other shit to do. But if you wanna come back tomorrow, we can try and get started on this. I’ll fill you in and everything.”

“Okay,” you nodded, “Sounds good. I’ll bring coffee,” you chuckled, “Oh, here, let me write down my number for you.”

Juice scrambled to find you a piece of scrap paper to write on, and you somehow managed to keep your laughter inside of you at that. You quickly jotted down your name and number onto the paper, holding your hand out for one last handshake before you left again for the day.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Juan Carlos,” you smiled.

“Yea,” he shook your hand, looking down at the paper he was holding as you started walking back towards the door, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Over the next couple of days, Juice filled you in on everything that he could. You could tell that he was beyond thankful to have someone else to share the workload with. Considering that he had been flying solo until you came around, he had been doing pretty well. You showed up with your own laptop, a few notebooks, and some other miscellaneous supplies that immediately had Juice assuming that you knew what you were doing. Really, it was just a lot of leftover things from college that you hadn’t gotten around to throwing away yet. Now you were glad you didn’t, since it was all going to come in handy.

“I finished putting together the job listing,” you said as you plopped down in the chair next to his behind the front desk. You opened your laptop, quickly opening the document in question, “I did some trial ones for the main positions that you said you need to fill. If I left anything out, feel free to let me know,” you paused as he looked over what you had written, “Oh, and I’ll need your help going and grabbing some of the supplies from the pet store. Our order finally came in.”

“Finally?”

You shrugged, laughing, “My definition of express shipping is different from theirs, I guess.”

He watched you for a moment, a smile on his face as you looked through your notes on what had to get done in the next couple of days before the interview process started. It was pretty obvious that that was going to be left completely in Juice’s court. You had yet to meet the other men who were apparently part of this entire operation, and you wondered if Juice was doing that on purpose.

“Thank you,” he finally got the words out.

You looked over at him, confused, “Hm?”

“Thanks,” he reiterated as he gestured to the screen, and the paperwork, “for helping with this. I know it’s a fucking mess but having you help has made things a lot easier.”

You shrugged, “No need to thank me—it’s all part of the job, right?”

“Yea, right.”

“But, if I got first pick of the schedule I wouldn’t be too upset about it. You know, if you wanted to say thank you that way,” you flashed him a cheeky smile before getting back to work.

The morning went on and eventually it was time for the two of you to head over and pick up a bulk of the supplies that you needed in order to get the place up and running. Juice had left most of that up to you, asking just to keep it all under a certain price-point. You were able to do that, although you were sure that as time went on you would be able to convince Juice, or whoever else, to swap some stuff out for things that were a little nicer, a little fancier even. You’d just have to play your cards right.

“C’mon,” you fished your keys out of your purse as you both made your way towards the front door, “I’ll drive.”

His eyes widened and he couldn’t stop the laugh that came out of him, “You’ll drive?”

You stopped, scoffing in disbelief, “What, how much do you think you can strap to the back of your Harley, hm? More than we can fit into the bed of my pickup?”

He opened his mouth to argue, but he realized that you had a point. He hadn’t thought to start bringing the van from the clubhouse around, so all he really had was his bike. Sighing, he held his hands up in surrender, “You got a point.”

You laughed, “I know.”

He looked at your truck, “This thing gonna make it there and back?”

You rolled your eyes, “She’s a little beat-up but she runs just fine. Got me here and moved in, right?” the two of you hopped into the truck, and as you were sliding the key into the ignition, you couldn’t help but to say, “If you really wanna drive that bad, by the way, get your own pickup.”

He laughed, “I’ll try to get something that passes inspection.”

After a lot of fumbling around before eventually letting the employees at the store help, the bed and back seat of your truck were successfully packed with everything that you’d ordered. The look of defeat on Juice’s face when he had to resign to asking for help was something you wished that you had caught on film. You just had to hope that the two of you would be alright getting it all out of your truck without accidentally breaking anything in the process.

When you pulled back into the parking lot at the daycare, you immediately noticed that there were a few more motorcycles parked out front. You tried not to be too obvious as you waited for some kind of reaction from Juice. You heard him sigh, saw him give a small shake of his head, but he didn’t say anything about it. You assumed that they were men from the club, but since you hadn’t met any of them yet, you had no idea what you were in for.

“Think they’ll at least help us unload all of this?” you asked with a laugh.

He chuckled, “Maybe if you ask. Do that at your own risk, though.”

Juice never talked about the club, and you never asked, either. It wasn’t a world that you were at all acquainted with, and truthfully, you didn’t feel like you were missing out on much. Once you realized that Juice was involved with an MC, you knew there’d be some crossover, but you weren’t going to try and insert yourself into that side of things more than necessary. If things got messy, you’d have no problem cutting the cord and finding somewhere else to work, different people to associate with. But you liked the potential of everything so far. And, even if you were shoving the feeling as deep down as you possibly could, you had to admit that you liked Juice, too. You knew precious little about the club outside the murmurs and rumors you’d heard, and you knew that you couldn’t believe everything that was said, but if any of it was true, you wondered how someone like Juice had ended up in a club like that.

“I can handle all of this if you need to go and talk to them,” you told him as you shut your door and made your way towards the bed of the truck.

“No, don’t worry about it,” he watched you drop the tailgate, “they can help, or they can wait.”

You didn’t push it farther, instead hopping up into the bed of the truck to start handing stuff down to him to carry in. Neither of you said anything more as you gathered up your first armful of things to bring inside. As you got closer to the door, you saw two men standing by the front desk, one behind it looking over the papers, and one in front of it watching the two of you making your way inside. You could feel the one man’s eyes studying you and you did your best to ignore it.

“Was starting to get nervous, Juicy Pants,” the man who had been watching the two of you walked closer as you both started setting things down, “Haven’t heard from you in a couple days,” he looked over at you, “Surprised you didn’t just up and skip town with your gorgeous friend here.”

You fought to keep your composure, not wanting this man to know that you had any semblance of nervousness in you. Propping the box you were holding against your hip, you didn’t your best to sound confident, “We’ve been busy getting this place ready since no one else seems too eager to help. Something else you need us to do for you?”

A smirk curled the ends of his mouth, “What’s your offer?”

Juice huffed out a sigh, “Tig, don’t.”

He looked over at him, “What? I’m just asking a question.”

By this point, the man behind the desk had given up on looking through the paperwork and had walked over to the three of you. Stopping beside the man in front of him, who you now knew was named Tig, he scanned you over the same way that Tig had. There was something different in his expression, though, in his eyes. You couldn’t put a name to it, though. What you did know, though, was that the President patch stitched into his kutte meant that whatever happened with this job and this building would all be leading back to him in one form or another.

He smiled at you as he started to speak, “Sorry about him, darlin’. We don’t take him out much,” he paused, waiting for you to make another comment, and you wished that you had one, but your mind was blank as you tried to get a grip on the dynamics here. Taking your pause as his cue to continue, he held out his hand, “I’m Jax, by the way.”

You used your free hand to shake his as you introduced yourself in return, “You got a couple minutes to spare, Jax? We got some more stuff to unload.”

Despite the fact that most of Jax’s focus was on you, he was very aware of the way that Juice was watching the two of you interact. Tig wasn’t lying when he said that they hadn’t really heard or seen much from Juice in a couple days, and now Jax knew why. Sure, getting all of this off the ground was keeping him plenty busy, but there was no way that Juice being able to spend all day working one-on-one with you wasn’t affecting how he spent his time.

“Sure,” he gestured towards the door, “You can talk me through some of those business plans while you’re at it. ‘Cause I know that Juice didn’t come up with all of those.”

You smiled, shaking your head as you walked back towards the door, “Juan came up with the framework for all of it, I’ve just been helping fill in the details.”

You missed the exchange of looks between Jax and Juice when you called him Juan, and Juice was beyond thankful for that. He knew that he was going to be getting an earful over that later when you weren’t around.

Jax focused his attention back on you as you hopped into the truck to pass more stuff off, “And what do you know about filling in the details, if you don’t mind me asking.”

“I was about eight weeks away from getting my MBA,” you tossed a box to Jax with a little more umph than necessary, “so I think I’m pretty qualified to fill in some blanks.”

He raised his eyebrows, smiling slightly as he nodded, “Alright then.”

“And,” you slid a few things to the edge before hopping down and grabbing them so you could walk back inside, “not for nothing, if you were worried about my credibility, you could’ve been around to help with all of this. Pitch in on the hiring process and all that,” the smile on your face took the venom out of your words but your point still got across fine.

He chuckled, knowing that an argument wasn’t going to be worth it for anything, “Fair,” he set his box down with the others, “Speaking of the hiring process, where are we with all of that?”

“She put together the listings,” Juice jumped into the conversation, “Gonna post them when we’re done with all of this. I’ll get some printed and sent out, too.”

“We get to help with the interviews?” Tig asked with a smirk.

Juice rolled his eyes, “It’s not gonna be like hiring girls for Redwoody.”

Your eyes widened and you choked back a laugh. When the men turned to look at you, you shook your head and tried to keep your laughter under control, “Sorry, sorry. But…Redwoody? First of all, that name,” you chuckled, “But second of all, how’d you guys go from porn to puppies? I don’t…I don’t get that.”

Jax had to laugh, hearing it phrased like that, “Whatever makes good, clean money.”

“And a lot of it,” Tig added on.

You nodded, not able to argue the very basic logic behind it even if the guys didn’t seem too well prepared for the actual business building side of it, “Right.”

Jax looked back and forth between you and Juice, “You two really need the extra help around here right now?”

You glanced over at Juice, knowing that it was really going to be his call at the end of all of this. You were helpful, and Juice took most of your advice at face-value, but you knew that these two guys weren’t going to be the same way. They weren’t the ones who had been working side-by-side with you getting all of this pulled together so quickly. Juice’s gaze fell to the floor as he contemplated his answer. The extra help would’ve been nice, sure, but he didn’t really want to have Jax or Tig, or any of the guys really, breathing down his neck and yours. The two of you working together seemed to be working so well. There had been moments, over the days that you’d been working together, that he almost forgot that this was all technically a club thing, not just something he happened to be doing and bringing you in to help with.

“We should be good once we get this place set up and the interviews done. Then we’ll be good to go,” Juice nodded, still not looking over at you.

“Either of you any good at interior design?” you asked with a laugh, “We gotta get it all set up and decorated.”

Tig spoke up, nudging Jax’s shoulder, “We should send Gem—”

“No,” Jax cut him off with a laugh, “we shouldn’t,” he looked over at you, “I’ll swing by with a couple of the guys tomorrow, help you set up all this. Put Juicey here in charge of the interviews,” he paused, smiling, “Then you can walk me through some of those plans.”

You knew that smile. You’d seen it on countless men, countless times before. It never meant anything good, and that was the last thing that you were interested in right now. Shaking your head, you said, “I’m telling you, you’re better off talking to Juan about all of that. I just work here,” you tucked your hands into your back pockets, “But I won’t say no to you bringing over some help to get the bulk of this setup done.”

Juice had watched your little exchange with Jax with bated breath. He didn’t want to admit that he felt relieved with the way you deflected Jax’s subtle invitation. Judging by the look that Jax cast his way, Juice had to assume that he wasn’t as good at keeping a neutral expression as he’d hoped.

You saw the three men all looking at each other, and you suddenly felt like you should be doing anything but standing there with them. Clearing your throat, you spoke to Juice, although at this point you were basically speaking to all of them, “I’m just gonna grab the last few things out of the truck. If you’re good to get the listings up, I’ll probably just head out for the day…give you guys a chance to go over some things.”

He didn’t want you to go, but he knew that whatever Jax and Tig wanted to talk about, probably wasn’t something that he wanted you hearing. He fumbled a sentence together, “Oh, uh, okay. Um, yea. Sounds…sounds good. I’ll just see you in the morning, then.”

“Yea,” you shot him a smile, “with a moving crew.”

You made quick work of the few items that were left in your truck. The three of them were chatting about minor things when you walked back in to set the last of your haul down. You said a quick goodbye to the three of them and went on your way. The second the door shut behind you, though, both Jax and Tig turned and gave Juice knowing looks. He rolled his eyes and shook his head, desperately trying not to get roped into that conversation with them.

“What did you guys need to talk about, anyway?” he tried to rein them back to the matters at hand.

It was evident on Jax’s face that he now wanted to spend their time razzing Juice over the blossoming crush he had on his new coworker, but he fought the urge. Resigning with a sigh, he allowed the conversation to stay on a more focused, professional track.

You showed up the next morning with a few trays of coffees from the café a few streets over. You didn’t know how many guys were going to be showing up, but you figured that it would be a nice gesture regardless. When you’d pulled into the parking lot, you saw Juice’s bike, which was the only one you think you’d ever recognize. There were two others, although you couldn’t remember if they were the same ones as the day before. There was also a van parked there as well.

You slung your backpack onto your shoulders before grabbing the drink trays and making your way towards the building. The closer you got, the more you could make out the movement inside. There were definitely more people in there than there had been. It was a far cry from it just being you and Juice together in the vast emptiness of the unfurnished building.

“Holy shit,” you said it mostly under your breath as you walked through the door.

You didn’t think that you’d shown up late. It was about the same time as you usually did. Since you guys weren’t technically open for business and there weren’t any dogs to take care of yet, both you and Juice just tried to get there are a relatively decent hour in the morning. Truthfully, you didn’t think that any of the men who were in the MC would be early birds. Apparently, you were wrong.

It looked like an entirely new place. All the stuff that you’d gone and picked up the day before was all set up. Kennels, pens, all manner of toys and mats, all of it was set up. The reception area didn’t look half bad, either. You looked around, trying to weave your way through the men as quickly and quietly as possible. More than anything you just wanted to talk to Juice and find out what happened.

Before you found Juice, Jax found you. He looked different than he had the day before, just a t-shirt on underneath his kutte and a backwards baseball cap on his head. You figured that the outfit was what passed for “casual” wear since he and the crew of guys had presumably been setting things up all morning.

His smile stretched a little wider as you wordlessly offered him a coffee from the tray in your hands. He took it, starting the conversation before taking a sip, “Not too bad, right?”

You chuckled, setting the tray down and letting your backpack fall off your shoulders, “Not bad, no,” you took your own coffee from the tray, “I guess I underestimated you guys a little bit.”

He shook his head, “We’re just trying to make up time.”

“Oh? Was the guilt trip effective yesterday, then?” you chuckled.

His lips curled into a smirk, “Something like that.”

You paused for a moment as you looked around again, “Juice here? I thought I saw his bike out front.”

His expression shifted as he tried to bite back a laugh, “Yea, yea, he’s here,” he nodded towards the door that led to what you assumed they finally turned into an office, “Got an interview going on.”

“Oh,” you nodded a sip of your drink, “Nice,” you paused for a beat, “When the hell did you guys get here?”

“Early,” he took a long sip from the cup in his hand, “Thanks for the coffee.”

You shrugged, offering a polite smile, “Sure.”

“Can I ask you somethin’?” he waited, and when you motioned for him to continue, he did, “What the hell are you doing working in a place like this? Thought you said you had a degree?”

You shook your head, “Not that simple. I, um, I needed a fresh start somewhere. Ended up here,” you looked around, “No buyer’s remorse yet.”

“Yet?” he chuckled.

“I’m still new in town. We’ll see,” you gave him a small smile.

It was surprising, yet not, how quickly you all completed the final stretch once the rest of the club started pitching in a little more. It seemed like in no time they had hired a decent number of staff and wrapped up the last few things so that the business could actually open. And then it did.

The entire vibe changed once things were up and running. You were still Juice’s right hand, and it was interesting to see the way that he stepped up to the plate a bit, but it was just as interesting to see the way that the rest of the club actually let him. You couldn’t say that you knew the members or understood the dynamics super well, but it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that Juice was somewhere near the bottom of the totem pole in the MC. Still, they let him man the ship, and it was all working out well because of that.

You were in your glory. No matter what you thought your life was going to look like a few months prior before you’d stumbled into Charming, it wouldn’t have compared to this. No amount of degrees or internships or whatever used to be in your plans could’ve beaten out the pure happiness and excitement that came from running the doggie daycare with Juice. It was absolute chaos every day. Semi-organized chaos, but still chaos. And you loved every second of it.

You were sitting inside the pen with a couple of the smaller, much younger dogs that now frequented your daycare. They were just a little too young, a little too small, to be let into the larger pen with the bigger dogs. You didn’t mind that one bit, though, taking any free time you got to sit and play with them. You were in the midst of being lovingly clobbered by an army of little paws when you heard someone clear their throat behind you.

Jax smiled, shaking his head at you, “Hey, darlin’.”

Despite the roll of your eyes, you smiled, knowing that you could spray him with the water bottle a thousand times over and he would still call you by the pet name he seemed so attached to, “What’s up, Teller?”

“Juice around?”

You spent more time with the club members than you used to, especially since they seemed to pop into the building more often to get their own dose of dog-time, but you still never picked up using the nickname they had for the man who had very quickly become one of your favorite people in Charming.

You nodded towards the back door, “Juan’s out back with a couple of the dogs,” you paused, searching Jax’s face, waiting for his expression to falter, “Everything alright?”

He shot you the same slick smile he had weeks before, “Everything’s fine. You worry too much.”

He was right, but could he really blame you? It wasn’t worth the argument, though, “Keep proving me wrong and we won’t have a problem,” you joked, but not really.

“Yes ma’am,” he leaned down, scratching one puppy gently behind the ears before heading off to find Juice.

You watched him as he walked away, wondering what their conversation was going to be about. Before Jax could make it out the door, Juice came bounding back inside, a pair of dogs at his heels. He and Jax both laughed as they tried to maneuver out of the way and not trip over the dogs who were eagerly sniffing at Jax’s sneakers.

“You got a sec, bro?” Jax asked.

“Uh, yea,” things had been going extremely well, but that question still sent a jolt of anxiety through Juice’s system. Gesturing towards the office, the two of them started to make their way. Once Juice shut the office door behind them, he turned back to Jax, trying to look more confident than he felt, “What’s up?”

“Things are running smoothly here, right?”

Juice shrugged, “Uh, yea, I think so. It’s been…it’s been great. Why?”

“You think you still need to be here to manage the day-to-day?”

Juice’s heart dropped into his stomach. He hadn’t thought about the fact that things going well would expedite him being pulled and put onto whatever project the guys decided to get into next. Truthfully, working with you made him completely forget that this wasn’t the endgame for him. You’d become such a fixture in his routine. He also knew, though, that if the club pulled him for something else, you would be able to handle it. The transition wouldn’t be too difficult, especially since the two of you pretty much ran the show together at this point anyway.

Jax could see the thoughts running through Juice’s head. Tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans, he shrugged, “If she’s not ready to take over, I get it. I just need—”

“No,” he cut him off, not wanting Jax to think that the hesitation was born out of a lack of faith in you, “That’s…that’s not it. She’s great,” he looked towards the door even though he couldn’t see you through the small window in it, “She’s…fuckin’ perfect for this, honestly. She’s good with the dogs, good with the people,” he gestured vaguely to the paperwork on the desk, “good with the books.”

“Good,” Jax nodded, smirking slightly as he waited for Juice to get to the conflict of it all. He studied Juice’s face for a beat longer, “Why do I feel like there should be a but here?”

Juice let out a deep sigh, “It’s not…her,” running his hands back over his head so that they landed, interlocked on the back of his neck, “I like it here.”

Jax stopped fighting the smirk, letting it take over his expression, “Do you?”

Juice rolled his eyes, “Don’t be like that.”

Jax chuckled, “C’mon, Juan, anyone with a goddamn set of eyes can see why you like it here. You ask her out yet?”

Juice scoffed, like it was the most ridiculous notion in the world, “I’m not gonna ask her out.”

“Why not?”

“Because she works here?”

Jax laughed, “Don’t act like you care about that, bro.”

“If she says no…”

“I don’t think she will.”

“Yea,” Juice shook his head, “because you know her so well.”

“I’m just saying, that the girl who is currently sitting out there letting herself get mauled by puppies, doesn’t seem like someone who is gonna shoot you down. She’s stuck around you this long, right?”

It wasn’t like Jax was the person that Juice would ordinarily seek out for relationship advice. But Juice had to admit, that this was probably the first time in recent history, if ever, that Jax was actually optimistic about a girl Juice was interested in. He wondered if that was a good sign or a terrible one.

“I’ll put a pin in the conversation about pulling you off of this if you ask her out,” Jax offered, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Juice let out a laugh of disbelief, “You can’t, you can’t do that.”

Jax shrugged, “Sure I can,” he stepped back and pulled the office door open, “Think about it,” he let out a quiet laugh as he exited the office.

Jax made his way back towards the front of the building, back towards the door to leave. You’d extracted yourself from the pile of puppies that you’d previously been buried under and were back behind the reception desk. You still had a small dog cradled in your lap as you typed on the computer, and Jax couldn’t help but to shake his head at the sight.

Looking up, you raised your eyebrows at him, “All good?”

He nodded, “Yea, so stop asking that,” he laughed, pausing for a moment before asking, “Any of my other guys still here?”

You shrugged, “They filter in and out a lot. Your sergeant at arms was here not too long ago, getting his ankles bit by a chihuahua who has no use for him.”

He nodded towards the dog in your lap, “That one?” Jax laughed when you nodded in response, “How’d Happy take that?”

“Not well,” you laughed, “I think he might’ve left.”

Walking up to the desk, he leaned against it so that he was directly in front of you. He waited for you to stop typing and look over at him before he spoke up, “You still liking it here? Planning on sticking around?”

You shrugged, nodding, “Yea, I don’t see any reason to leave. Why? You hear rumors?”

He chuckled, shaking his head, “Nah, just making sure you still don’t have any buyers remorse.”

You smiled, “I don’t.”

“Good,” Jax rapped his knuckles against the desk as he made his way to leave, “’Cause I don’t know what Juice would do without you here at this point.

It was the end of the night, all the dogs had been picked up by their respective owners, you sent the other employees home a while before. The whole building was quiet, which felt strange these days. It used to be nothing but silence in the beginning when it was just you and Juice, but that felt like such a distant memory now that it was usually filled with the hustle and bustle of dogs and puppies and workers and the men from the MC popping in and out all the time. The comfortable chaos had become home, and when it was quiet now, it almost felt wrong.

You were closing out a last few things from the day, trying to get a head start on the schedule for the following week. You knew that Juice was still there, that he was wrapping things up in the office, but you still jumped a bit when you heard him clear his throat to get your attention.

He let out a nervous laugh, an apologetic smile spreading across his face, “Sorry.”

“No,” you smiled and waved off the apology, “Don’t be. I just get in the zone sometimes, you know?”

“Trust me, I get it.”

Taking a deep breath, you ran your hands down your face before finally admitting that maybe it was time to call it a day. Shutting down the computer, you looked over at Juice, “You alright?”

“Yea,” he nodded, although the look in his eyes was less convincing, “Yea I’m good.”

“You sure?” you hopped out of your chair and grabbed your bag off the floor, “Everything go alright with Jax today?” he nodded but you could sense the hesitation, “What’d you guys talk about?” you knew it wasn’t really your business but you couldn’t stop yourself.

Juice was telling you the truth before he thought better of it, “We were talking about pulling me off this project.”

Your chest tightened more than you thought it would at news like that, “Oh.”

“He’s not,” he quickly amended his statement, “We’re not. I’m not going anywhere yet.”

You let out a quiet sigh of relief, “Oh, good.”

The two of you walked towards the main doors, “You probably could run this place on your own, though, you know,” Juice said.

“Please don’t make me do that,” you joked as you locked the door once the two of you stepped outside.

“You’re not dying to get rid of me?” the boyish grin on his face made your heart melt.

“Of course not,” you toyed with the keys to your truck, “You’re like, my second favorite thing about working here.”

“Second?” he laughed.

You chuckled, “First is the dogs, obviously. Second is you. But a very close third is watching the rest of your biker buddies flounder and get chased around by everything from chihuahuas to rottweilers. Great entertainment.”

“I wouldn’t be mad if I came in third to that, honestly,” he joked.

There were a few beats of silence as he walked over to your truck with you. You couldn’t help but ask, “You thinking of leaving?”

His eyes grew wide as he shook his head, “No, no, not at all. Jax was the one who mentioned it. I, uh, I told him I didn’t want to leave.”

“Really?”

“Yea,” he nervously tucked his hands into his pockets, “I just, I really like working here. With you.”

The last part he said so quietly that you almost missed it. Your heart skipped a beat in your chest as you smile, “I like working here with you too,” you paused, chuckling, “I still can’t believe you hired me based off me saying that I used to dog-sit as a parttime gig in college.”

“Really?” he laughed, “I totally believe it.”

“I’m glad you did,” you nodded, leaning back against the side of your truck.

“I love all this,” he nodded towards the building, “what we got going now. But I do, I dunno, I do miss when it was just the two of us all the time,” his face felt like it was on fire and he instantly regretted saying the words.

Your face warmed at the sentiment, “It was fun, huh? Despite the fact that we didn’t know what the fuck we were doing.”

“Speak for yourself,” he laughed, “I still don’t know what I’m doing.”

You smiled, shaking your head. You waited for a moment, watching the tiny shifts in his expression, “What’re you thinking, Juan?”

“Nothing,” he shook his head, but it wasn’t convincing.

“Liar,” you laughed.

He smiled but still couldn’t quite look you in the eye, “No, it’s, I just, I don’t wanna say something and make things weird.”

“Well. Now it’s gonna be weird if you don’t say it. So you might as well,” you reached out, resting your hand on his shoulder for a fleeting moment, “What’s up?”

“I really like you,” it was like the brief contact forced the words out of him. His eyes blew wide open as he realized what he said, “I don’t, it’s not like,” he took a breath to try and get his words together, “I know you probably don’t feel the same way, and, and that’s fine. You’re just really funny, and smart, and honestly after watching you with all the dogs here I’m not totally convinced that you’re not secretly a Disney princess,” he laughed nervously, “I just…I think you’re really great.”

You wouldn’t have been able to dial back the grin on your face even if you tried, “I think you’re really great too.”

His expression brightened, “Yea?”

You laughed, nodding, “Yea.”

“You think I could take you out sometime?”

You smiled, “I think I could make that work, move some things around in my work schedule.”

He laughed, “I think I know a guy who can help with that.”

You bit down lightly at your bottom lip in an attempt to contain your grin, “Oh really?”

He wanted to kiss you, but he knew he wasn’t going to be brave enough to do it. His palms were already starting to sweat just from telling you that he liked you. There was no way he was going to be able to survive anything more without driving himself to a heart attack.

“I’ll, um, I’ll let you get home. I’ll see you tomorrow?” he sounded hopeful, like it wasn’t a guarantee that you’d be there.

You laughed, “That’s a pretty safe bet, yea.”

“Cool,” the shy, dorky grin on his face made your heart melt.

He turned to walk away and you shook your head, reaching out for his arm as you spoke, “Juan, wait.”

He turned back, caught between focusing on the heat from your hand as he soaked into his arm, and the look in your eyes as they locked onto his, “Yea, what’s—”

You cut him off, leaning in and pressing your lips to his. He was surprised at first, hesitant, but once he realized that it was really happening, he leaned right into it. He could feel the way your lips curled into a smile as he pulled you in closer, tighter, like it might be the first and last time he got to do that. Your thumb grazed along his cheek and he melted into your touch like it was second-nature.

When you finally pulled away, you were both out of breath, faces warm like you were two teenagers sneaking in a kiss goodbye past curfew. Resting your palm on the leather of his kutte, you said, “I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”

His smile was bright as his heart pounded inside his chest, “Can’t wait.”

[kira-fluff]

Heeey!

Saeyoung, Yoosung, Jumin and Zen reacting to to “hotel only one bed” trope ? ♥️

a/n: of course you can lovely! <3 *AHEM* Lemme just say this trope is ELITE and I will NEVER not love it // also, i’m writing it like it’s before they’re dating (OF COURSE) because I want it to be spicy (actually that’s the only thing that would make sense for this prompt but you get my point whatever). ALSO also I’m basing the fancy hotel off my stay at the Ritz Carlton (it was like $25,000 a night) because my grandma couldn’t manage money N E WAYSS. Also, if y’all could let me know whether you prefer Y/N to MC pls lmk k thx 

TW: drunk old lady w/no filter, gets pretty suggestive because I couldn’t help myself, an overbearing aunt, savage Italians, and loud hotel neighbor 

Note: omfg i accidentally made this so long oh well here’s yo present lmao 

“There’s only one bed” PT.1 PT.2

- 

Saeyoung 

Getaway missions are mad cool until you can’t sleep 

When you finally neared the parking entrance to your hotel you were SO looking forward to taking a nice hot shower before shimming into the covers of your crisp, (clean, you hoped) sheets. 

It was past 3AM when Saeyoung finally drove his elegant vehicular device (because what other word is there for it) into a secured parking space 

“Because I don’t trust those shady valets, y/n.” 

“Whatever you say, Seven”, you replied groggily. 

You hauled ass up to the front desk, then to the elevator of the exquisite hotel you were staying at

not that you cared 

because S L E E P 

but Saeyoung likes to quote Jurassic Park (because of course he does) like “I spare no expense, y/n” 

“I’m too tired to laugh” 

*gASP* 

“Not everyone naturally stays up until the early morning light before going to sleep.” 

“It really should become a thing, it’s honestly very iconic of me.” (it’s not)

By the time your conversation ended you were glad to see your hotel number and a little key card slot. 

Saeyoung made a show of sticking the key card in like a spy or something 

it was funny for normal y/n but not for tired y/n 

“Here’s your room, M’lady.” 

He held the door open to your room as you looked around the room 

a large, lush bed set before a ginormous flat screen TV with complimentary expensive chocolates laid before you as well as complimentary take-home elegant towels and slippers. 

suddenly, you heard a knock on the door 

blinking in confusion, you opened to see it was Saeyoung 

“Um.. hey! What’s up?” 

Saeyoung looked a bit bewildered himself before saying, 

“Hey, so, I realized my key card was the same room number as yours and I was like ‘That’s weird!’ so I called the front desk who verified that I had placed a reservation for one room, not two, so I hacked into their system to see what went wrong and if I could change it but it looks like they’re completely booked and I think I had made the reservation before I knew that you had to come along and I’m so sorry” 

he was breathless after the mouthful he just gave you 

As it was 3AM a drunk, old woman was tripping her way to her room and shouted much louder than she should at 3AM, “Kiss her already n’ fuck, ya youngin’s!” 

Saeyoung’s hair now matched his face :) 

His ears were tipped bright red before coughing awkwardly 

“I can sleep on the ground. I’ve done it plenty of times, it’s actually pretty comfy.” 

“Um, Sev’ I’m not going to make you just sleep on the floor. If you want--” 

“You’re not making me, y/n, I want to do this” 

“Actually I think I’ll sleep on the floor, I sleep a lot better on the ground”, you fibbed. 

“You’re sleeping on that big ass bed.” 

“No you are.” 

“If you don’t listen I’ll sleep in the bath tub instead of the floor.” 

“Then I’LL sleep outside the room!” 

“LIKE HELL YOU WILL!” 

“WATCH ME” 

the phone rang, a worker politely asking you to quiet a bit down because even with your luxurious privacy walls, guests could still hear you arguing. 

Saeyoung began whisper shouting, “Guess that settles it.” 

he plopped on the ground, fake snoring with his arm as a pillow

you sighed 

“Fine, if neither of us are going to agree to this then we are both going to sleep in this bed.” 

Saeyoung blushed lightly at your boldness, a tad worried you’d find him creepy or weird

You started again, beginning to undress a little, causing Seven to yelp in panic and turn around immediately, shielding his eyes,

Now in your tank top and your leggings you’d been wearing under sweatpants and a t-shirt, you said, “I’m gonna go take a quick shower and go to bed. I’m so tired.” 

Seven turned around only when he’d heard the bathroom door shut 

he sighed, What am I going to do with this girl. 

By the time you’d come out of the bathroom, drying your wet hair, Seven was lying on the bed, clad in casual t-shirt and jeans. 

“Come on, Saeyoung, you have comfy clothes! It’s okay, change! I’m done in the bathroom now.” 

“Nah, this is fine.” This was not fine. Saeyoung was out of his area of expertise of expecting the unexpected because God you were so unpredictable. 

“Please” you jutted out your bottom lip in a little pout, being sure to make eye contact with him 

Something glowered in his eyes for a split second before he half-smiled saying, “Ah, little Y/n, you know I can’t say no to you when you go all sad on me.” 

He stepped into the bathroom to change, but let’s be honest. He was freaking the fuck out. 

he covered his flushed face, changing into his soft sweatpants and a cozy sweatshirt. he was scared 

the more comfortable he became the more likely he’d accidentally get closer to you and then you’d freak out because you’d hear the sound of his heart beat like it’s a fucking rave concert and then you’d be weirded forever and quite possibly never talk to him again

but on the outside, he stepped out of the bathroom, whipping his phone out with a huge smirk saying, “Smile” 

you threw up a peace sign with your tongue sticking out 

he laughed before sending it to the RFA chat 

707: Sleepover lolol [see attachment]

immediately both your phones blew up with buzzes of notifications from the chat 

you laughed lightly, brushing a stray hair from your face to tuck it behind your ear 

this was gonna be a long night for Seven. 

Zen: UGH get away from her!!!!!!!!!111!!1!!

Jumin: Maybe you should learn to type first. 

Zen: shut it cat freak

Zen: seven answer 

Zen: hey 

Zen: y/n, text “qwerty” if you’re in any kind of danger 

Jumin: What a strange code. 

You: qwerty :(

707: lololololol

Zen: !!!!!

Zen: ASJDHKJFASHFKJA 

Jumin: -_- 

Zen: WE NEED A CAR, NO A HELICOPTER im omw!! 

You: just kidding <3 i’m fine you guys 

707: lololol 

Jumin: Have a bit more faith in your subordinates, Zen. 

You closed the chat and muted your phone, expecting the incoming argument that was quickly to ensue. 

You patted the bed lightly, ushering Saeyoung to lie down next to you. 

He obliged, though he politely laid at the far edge of the left side of the bed. 

You yawned before shutting the light off and whispering a “good night”. 

Saeyoung glanced at the clock. 4AM. Only 15 minutes had passed. You were breathing softly in your sleep within the 10 minutes after you’d said goodnight and here he was still awake. 

You suddenly tousled in your sleep, and Saeyoung raised his head, whispering a soft, “Did I wake you up?” 

You replied with a soft moan before abruptly turning left onto his corner of the bed and grabbing for the first thing you’d felt -- his torso. 

Saeyoung’s breath hitched as he felt you exploring the new found “object”, running your fingers up and down his torso and nearing dangerous areas below 

Saeyoung whisper-shouted, “What are you doing?” 

He leaned closer to hear your reply, but your only answer was more soft little snores 

Saeyoung sighed, trying to lightly grab your wrists without waking you up, and directing toward yourself

no matter how hard he’d try, your arms kept finding his own

your nails would softly ghost over his chest or neck, causing him to shiver and blush profusely 

again, he sighed, trying his hardest not to give into your sleepy state 

until you broke him with a soft utterance, “Sae....young..” 

Saeyoung’s eyes widened to the size of saucers before he dared to look down at you, your hair curling on the bed every which-way.. your mouth slightly agap... 

he groaned, his brows furrowed and his eyes shut

at last he slunk his arms around your torso, being sure to respectfully keep them high around your waist 

he buried his face in the crook of your neck to subconsciously try to hide his ever growing blush (and erection) 

I don’t know how much longer I can keep doing this ‘friend’ thing when you’re driving me this crazy, y/n.

You awoke to a sleeping Saeyoung, his toned arms enveloping your small body in a hug

shamelessly, you laid still for a few moments longer. 

Yoosung 

this bean is lonely uwu

so when he’d invited to you go with him on a trip his uncle had paid for, you felt bad saying “yes” because it’s a paid trip!! 

until he begged you because his cousin Chaewon would be there and he was always really pushy and borderline a huge fuck boi 

so you conceded 

but hey free trip for the both of you minus shitty family gatherings with no one you know, right?! 

you hope there’s at least one dog. and alcohol. 

dog + alcohol at a party = an actual fun fucking time 

you were glad Yoosung was there with you because he honestly couldn’t agree with you more 

You opened your beach-side resort room to find there’s only one bed. 

Yoosung blanched and quickly dialed his auntie, who’d made the resort reservations

“Ah...hi auntie! Um, how come there isn’t a separate room for me and y/n?” 

his aunt cackled into the phone, “Aren’t you an old fashioned little gentlemen!!! Awe~~~ you’ve grown up to be such a good boy! <3 Well don’t worry, I won’t say a word to my sister or your pops. Enjoy the time you have with your adorable girlfriend and get it on a little!! I’ve got condoms if ya need ‘em honey~~ Remember dearie, when the shlong is not covered, the child support better be.” 

Yoosung hurriedly hung up the phone, his face completely red, praying you hadn’t heard the conversation that’d just ensued. 

You did 

but you smile and say, “So.. what’d they say?” 

He cleared his throat before saying, “Well, --err.. Basically there’s been a little mishap. B-but don’t worry!! I can just ask Chaewon if I can spend the night in his room.” 

“Didn’t you say he leaves a sock on the door handle every time--”

“YES but I want you to be comfortable, okay! It’s really not a big deal.” 

You shyly smiled while looking down before softly saying, “You can sleep with me.” 

Yoosung’s eyes widened and you quickly looked up, your face flushing to a deep crimson 

“I-I-I meant in the bed!!! With me. We can lie together. In the bed---- I mean we--” 

Yoosung could practically see the steam coming out of your ears and the room felt a LOT hotter 

“S-sure! Sounds great.” he had a feeling if you didn’t agree you’d end up embarrassing yourself further.. and he didn’t want you to feel bad. And he didn’t want those thoughts circulating his mind again. 

“Alright, so I’m going to hop in the shower, y/n... unless you want to go first?”

Gulping down some complimentary water you’d found in the hotel mini fridge, you quickly replied with a shake of your head. 

Nodding, Yoosung make quick work of washing his hair and trying to give himself a pep talk before he would be sleeping next to you. 

Thankful for the big size of the resort bed, you climbed under the covers, already beginning to feel sleep take you 

When Yoosung had at last dried himself off and walked out to the bed area of the resort room, he gazed at how small you looked, hugging a soft pillow in your arms, your eyes fluttered shut 

He looked away, feeling like a creep. 

He shut off the light after making a call to the resort staff to wake him up at 8AM as directed by his uncle’s itinerary

He slid under the covers, shoving a pillow in between the two of you as a little border to separate the two of you 

it wasn’t until further in the night when Yoosung had felt a jolt and he looked up in panic, through the blackness recognizing the pillow-border had been cast onto the ground 

and even more noticeably, your leg was swung over his hip, your body flush to his own 

your arms were snaked around his neck

he felt like he could feel every inch of you

your soft breath just below his ear 

your soft .. er.. chest... against his torso 

your stomach and .. the rest of it... against his own 

Yoosung could not breathe

like someone actually help this man for he is losing oxygen by the minute 

He squeezed his eyes shut and make the executive decision to wait it out til morning 

he was terrified that if he’d move you, you’d wake up and see just how much you affect him. 

And so, when the phone rang that morning, you’d startled, looking up to see your tangled limbs lying on top of his own

“oH MY GOD I’M SO SORRY YOOSUNG UGH IT’S A HABIT OF MINE AHAHHSAHDAJSHS” 

he looked at you with eyes that had noticeable circles under them (darker than even after his LOLOL gaming) 

“you look like you didn’t sleep much.... --- Is it because of me!? Oh my god I’m so sorry you should’ve just shoved me off or something seriously I didn’t mean to do it on purpose, honest!!” 

“N-no, no it’s really not!! I promise!!” He tried his best to grin, though it probably looked like a grimace, because the next thing you said was, “I’ll make it up to you” 

“You don’t need to do that. Really, I liked it.” 

It took a moment for him to realize what he just said. 

“I-I mean I like you! I mean I liked sleeping with you!!! I mean--!!” 

Yoosung was quickly spinning circles in his mind 

you couldn’t help the little giggle that came out of your mouth, “I guess we’re pretty similar, huh?” 

Yoosung smiled lightly, “Yeah, guess so.” 

You walked out together toward the breakfast area of the resort

“Hey”, you started, “Is.. Did you mean what you said? About liking me?” 

Yoosung glanced away, taking a deep breath before saying, “Yeah, yeah I did. I really like you.” 

You couldn’t hold back the big ol’ smile that took over your face as you proudly declared, “Me too!!” 

Right when Yoosung was going to go in for a kiss, he saw his auntie suddenly right next to the both of you 

“Oh my GOD when did you get here?!” 

She smirked, “My question first, dearie, what did you two like?” 

Neither of you answered, your cheeks growing red 

“You know, the first time your uncle did it with me I felt the same way. Like, what a man! Must run in the fam--” 

“OKAY! THANK YOU FOR THAT AUNTIE BUT BREAKFAST IS CALLING MY NAME MM SMELLS GOOD SEE YOU LATER.” 

Your blush didn’t leave you as you smeared strawberry cream cheese on your toasted bagel 

This trip was going to be very VERY difficult. Thank God there was alcohol. And Yoosung. And probably dogs. And Yoosung. 

Yeah. 

Gotta love relatives. 

Jumin 

You received a call from a stern voice you didn’t recognize

<<“Hello. This is Mr. Han’s chauffeur. I’m approximately 6.3 miles away from your residence. Do not worry about clothes or other necessities. All will be provided for you.”>>

“Uh.. thanks? Where....?” 

<<“Mr. Han has invited you to join him on his stay at the Ppalgan Vineyard Estates. Have you not received the notification?”>>

You glanced at your phone, seeing two unread messages on your phone. 

You read them, feeling bad you hadn’t seen them before. 

“Yes, yes of course. Thank you. Tell him I said thank you. Are you sure it’s okay for me to attend?” 

<<“Miss Y/L/N, Mr. Han gave me specific instructions to assure you would be able to come with him. I have been ordered to give 2 minute updates following your being picked up. I can assure you, it is his utmost wish that you join him this weekend. I’d be honored to thank him on your behalf, though I feel it would mean much more to him if you said it to him rather than me.” >>

“You’re right, thank you. And thanks for driving me. And for all the other stuff you said”, you replied nervously. 

<<”There is no need to thank me, Miss. I am glad to serve Mr. Han in anyway I can.”>>

The call hung up before you could spout out more thank yous 

you phone buzzed, startling you. 

you clicked the notification

<<(XXX-XXX-XXXX HAN COMPANIES) I’ve arrived at your residence. Let me know if there is anything I can carry for you. Sent 13:52>>

You quickly texted a reply of gratitude before rushing down the stairs out of your apartment, not wanting to make Jumin’s chauffeur wait. 

“Good to see you Miss Y/L/N. Is there anything I can get you? I have been given orders to purchase anything you may want or need on our way to the airport.” 

He quickly texted something on his phone, presumably a text to Jumin about your safe arrival to his limo.

“A-airport? You mean, like, flying? Are you sure I don’t need my wallet? It’s not too late for me to go grab it, right? I have my debit card on my phone too, otherwise.” 

“Miss Y/L/N you are not to spent a single won on this vacation. All is paid for.” 

“But my clothes... I don’t want Jumin to have to pay for all new things!!” 

"I assure you, money is not something Mr. Han wishes for you to be concerned with.” 

You’d stayed silent at that, feeling bad that you’d already bothered the poor man who’d just been ordered to drive you, not reassure you of Jumin’s financial affairs. 

You grew quiet, looking out the window as trees, streets, and cars zoomed past you. 

“If you so wish, there are numerous meals options in the compartments below the seats as well as alcohol, carbonated beverages and iced water glasses. You are, of course, welcome to any of these. Please do not hesitate to notify me if there is something you’d like instead. We’d glad to make it a regular option in all of our limousines.” 

You flushed, embarrassed at the amount of power Jumin’s words, and effectively, your own seemed to have on the entire Han Conglomerate as a whole. You laughed a little, it was funny thinking to yourself that you had so much power as to decide snack options for Jumin’s cars. 

Jumin was extra like that, he always went above and beyond to make you comfortable. You loved that about him. It made you feel a little spoiled, so you instinctively rejected most offers at things that seemed to further complicate his worker’s duties. 

You had no idea that when the chauffeur had said airport he meant the Han Private Airway Transportation Zone. 

As in... private jet. 

It was hard not to feel like you were in a whole different world. 

Not that Jumin treated you that way... but it was hard not to notice! 

You bowed in thanks to the driver before hastily finding your way to the nearest man standing in another black suit, his hands folded together in front of him. 

As soon as you uttered your name, his whole demeanor changed and he instantly had gone from cool and collected to humble and overwhelmingly kind. 

He’d quickly made his way to the boarding area, escorting you to the jet before leaving you at a polite distance way from Jumin who’d been looking at you from the moment you’d entered the aircraft. 

His eyes searched your own as you’d yet to discover his presence 

He couldn’t help but rake his eyes up and down your body, admiring the way you could look just in anything. 

He at last saw you searching the spacious cabin, at last laying eyes on him. 

His heart pounded faster, as if your noticing him made his heart leap in joy

You looked relieved and smiled, running over to him and sitting down next to him 

“Hi Jumin!! Oh, should I be calling you Mr. Han? That’s what your chauffeur called you.. sorry if that’s what I should’ve been addressing you as!!” 

His deep voice rumbled in your ear, causing you to shudder, “Jumin is fine.” 

You gazed up at him through your lashes, noticing the way his perfectly tailored vest made him look so... well... for lack of better word...hot. 

“Wow. You look...” Your eyes moved from his hair, to his face, to his neck, to his torso, slowly to his groin, to his legs... before you realized what you’d been doing and quickly your eyes shot up again. 

You bit your lip, “You look nice.” 

“Nice?” 

You laughed shyly, and slightly (embarrassingly) breathless, “Yeah. Yeah you do. Nice.” 

Jumin couldn’t help the sly smile he’d been holding back before replying, “You look beautiful.” 

You flushed and looked down, squirming in your seat a little before looking at him once more, offering a small, “..thank you..” 

After a few minutes of silence, you’d decided to change the subject, chattering on about how you wondered what this mysterious vacation would hold 

Jumin couldn’t help is concentration half on every word you were saying, but also your lips. Slowly licking his own, he nodded along when you’d gotten especially enthusiastic, grinning slightly when you’d gotten so excited you’d leapt out of your luxury seat. 

Within a half hour of the trip to your destination in Italy, Jumin had trouble concentrating on much else. 

Get it together, Jumin, you’re not some fool like Zen. 

It’d gotten worse the more you’d leaned further in your seat, your chest becoming slightly exposed

he covered his mouth with a hand, opting for looking out one of the many windows of the jet. 

You’d always caught his attention and made him lose his focus -- something he’d never lost before he met you 

He blamed the strawberry sent that you’d always carried with you 

He wasn’t much for expensive, faux perfume that so many of his father’s skanks would wear... it was like no other. 

After a few hours of grueling torture on your part (though you hadn’t know every single time you’d grabbed his hand or arm it’d sent his heart on a sky dive) Jumin was glad to have arrived in the gorgeous Italian acreage of the countryside. 

It was even more beautiful at the dusk of night, you’d decided 

Immediately a shiny vehicle pulled up, ready to transport you and Jumin to the estate you were to be residing in for the weekend. 

Upon pulling into the culdesac, you almost scoffed at the word “estate” -- it was more of a country in and of itself, land stretched beyond what you could see 

The mansion itself stood on pillars and high, Gothic windows. 

Inside, flying buttresses decorated the building, giving it an elegant and aged ambiance that you just adored 

“It’s so beautiful.” 

He smiled at you then, watching you take in the wonders he’d realized he took for granted. 

He was then directed to a double-door entrance way, “Your room, Mr. Han, Miss Y/L/N.” 

“Separate, correct?” 

The man stood in surprise, looking slightly aghast, “T-they never specified such details.” 

“Contact them immediately to confirm. I’ll work it out from there.” 

“Yes, Mr. Han.” From there, the man scurried away to contact the head of the estate. 

After a few moments, he returned, “The Rossi Conglomerate had assumed that you’d brought your fiance with you.” 

“Did you mention I don’t have one?” 

“Y-yes, of course! But, Mr. Han, your father--”

Jumin sighed, “I’ll take care of it.” with a wave of his hand, the man was gone 

You thanked him on his way out. 

Jumin looked at you, searching for a reaction of displeasure or worry

When he didn’t find one, he began, “I was notified the Rossi had booked their other estates to their American investors. My being here is a formality, but it is business. It would be a great discourtesy to demand--” 

You smiled reassuringly, “Jumin, don’t worry about it.. we’ll share the bed, okay?” You held your hand in his own, rubbing soothing circles on his knuckles. 

Jumin looked at you, choking on his spit slightly. 

“Y/N you do understand that--” 

“It’s fine, Jumin!! It’s late already, I’ll just put up my hair.. and.. do you know where the night clothes would be?” 

He watched as you fixed a bobby pin between your teeth before running your fingers through your hair, watching as you arched your back to-- 

“Jumin? ...you don’t know?” 

He cleared his throat, looking away, pink dusting his cheeks

“Bathroom.” 

You thanked him, unaware of his watchful eyes 

It had been a few seconds since you’d entered the bathroom before he heard a loud and alarmed, “..UM....JUMIN...?!” 

He’d quickly made his way into the bathroom

“What’s wro--” 

He looked and laying on the long granite island of the large bathroom was a silky set of lingerie as well as a note in Italian you couldn’t read. 

Jumin’s words stopped dead on his lips as he stared at you, then the silky underwear set, you, silky underwear, you.......silky underwear. 

On the outside, Jumin liked to think he came off as calm and collected, saying, “I can get you something else to wear.” 

But when he’d made it two steps out of the bathroom he had a little collision. And by collision, I mean his face.. and the wall. 

He looked in every drawer, finding nothing. He presumed clothes would be delivered as specified. But it was late already.. their servants are dismissed, only the protective guards surrounded the inside and outside of the estate.. explaining the situation to them didn’t seem very promising. 

Of course you were kicking yourself, before you’d found their little....gift... you’d cast your days clothes into the washer. They were probably soaked by now. 

Maybe I could use a hair dryer...? Or I could stuff them in the dryer?? 

Either way you’d be without clothes for.. too long. 

And nothing would be greater punishment then showing all that in front of the man you had completely fallen for... 

You heard a knock on the bathroom door. You listened from inside. 

“Hey, I, uh, couldn’t find anything. Do you think you could wear your clothes from today?” 

You whimpered, on the verge of tears, “I already put it in the washer!” 

He knocked again, “Can I hand you something?”, he asked, undoing the buttons of his formal shirt. 

“C-close your eyes!” 

Jumin chuckled darkly before covering his eyes and handing her his collared shirt 

“I’d give you the pants, too, but I don’t think they’d really fit you. Could you look at what they’d provided for me? Maybe slip on something from mine.” 

“N-no! That’d be even worse for me!! .. and you!” You blushed again imagining him half naked

You hurriedly shuffled through the drawers, but to no avail. 

You gulped, slipping on the lingerie to ensure that maybe something would be covered before buttoning Jumin’s formal shirt on you as well. 

it was so big it didn’t leave much for the imagination 

but you decided through a 10 minute pep talk that you’d suck it up and try your best to make his shirt into a night gown. 

You at last stepped out of the bathroom, Jumin’s head shooting toward the sudden noise before taking you in 

He could scarcely breathe, much less come up with a coherent sentence 

you were in his shirt... 

with barely any clothes on underneath

and you looked up at him shyly, biting your lip a little 

drawing even more attention to your lips 

Jumin had to stifle a groan, opting to head to the bathroom to change

After splashing some cold water on his face in a poor attempt to get his head out of the gutter, he quickly got on his pjs 

after you both were ready for bed, Jumin sat on the bed, opening a small novel he’d been enjoying, Anthem.  

His attention was immediately diverted from the dystopian fiction when he saw you were stretching

His shirt rode up high as he took in the way the lingerie perfect accentuated your curves, though it didn’t cover much below the waist 

Noticing your folly, your eyes widened in shock before you immediately put your hands down

which, just your luck, made it all worse. 

the sudden movement disheveled the shirt, causing it to ride down completely on one side, openly displaying the soft brassiere beneath it 

Jumin slammed his book so hard it left an echo in the large room. 

Great. He couldn’t even make it look like his book was suddenly unbelievably interesting that he just so happened to not take notice of the obvious sight before him.

You blanched, feeling a breeze along your shoulder, gasping before running to your side of the bed and pretending you don’t exist anymore 

Meanwhile Jumin is in a  c r i s i s 

In the most eloquent of words, his mind said holy fucking motherfucking shit oh my God fuck fuck fuck AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH oh my god shit shit shit fuck shit sdfasodjgiajsidogjosdg MALFUNCTION!! WARNING!!!! RUN BITCH!!! 

But Jumin didn’t run

because mama ain’t raise no bitch 

but also because if he stood up it would be blatantly obvious that he had-- 

Stop thinking about it, Jumin.

He tried to redirect his mind to his 5 senses, a grounding technique he’d learned when he got too anxious when he was younger 

But sight seemed to dominate it as his mind replayed your facial expressions, the way your hands awkwardly tried to cover yourself up, the way you looked the way he’d take it all off--- 

Oh God. I’m deep in shit. 

He had never been so pissed at himself... and embarrassed. 

He looked over at you, a horrible decision, really. 

You were still awake, your face was redder than the strawberry sent that adorned you 

“s-sorry..” you whispered, willing yourself to try to forget, “pretend that never happened..” 

Jumin was practically feral and you were saying it never happened? 

Jumin couldn’t just pretend he didn’t just see a fucking goddess 

but he would for you 

“..........pretend what never happened?” 

You sighed, a small smile on your face as you quickly turned to thank him 

but he was a LOT closer than you imagined 

he was propped up on one elbow, looking down at you, his head slightly angled. 

And suddenly your faces weren’t so far apart.

And you couldn’t help but slowly close your eyes 

Jumin felt confusion when you’d done this

he can be a bit of a pea brain, so he of course said, “I’m sure you’re very tired.” 

He shut off the light, reaching over you 

You held back the big frown you’d gotten when you realized he’d rejected you 

unbeknownst to you that it took everything in him, from the moment he’d saw you in the jet cabin, not to scoop you up in his arms and make out with you the whole way there. 

Zen 

Was Zen going to invite you to his own fucking tour? 

Of course he was 

he liked flexing his connections 

and most of all, showing you just how much he cared about you 

and loved you

but not the love part because God if you ever found out Zen might jump into the nearest body of water and never return 

not that he didn’t have any confidence

he has lots of it 

but it all kind of disintegrates when he gets to talking about his real feelings

But come on, it was blatantly obvious to anyone who had heckin eyes 

or ears 

or just any functioning body 

the way he’d try to subtly throw an arm over your shoulder 

or he’d lean in whenever you spoke 

or the way he’d readjust his posture when you walked into a room 

or the way everyone caught him staring 

like anytime you weren’t looking 

or when you are looking because he is “built different” 

So the limo ride to the fancy hotel he was to stay at was something that had him looking forward to the tour, but also dreading it 

you’d sat close to him in the limo because his agent and other workers were sitting along with him. 

So close that your ass got pushed further and further onto his lap

because damn where the fuck are we and why are there so many goddamn potholes 

Zen tried to steady you by firmly grabbing your hips 

which was NOT the move 

because now that you were firmly set on his lap, every bump felt like a fucking war against his hormones. 

Like a gentleman, he quickly opted to seat you next to him, not wanting you to feel embarrassed 

still, he could feel you being pulled closer to him with every long turn the limo made or every bump or abrupt stop 

and it was torture. 

like this man is sweating 

but by some miracle you arrive at the hotel in one piece! Yay! 

but Zen’s soul has left his body~~ 

so you get set up 

You open the room, “Look, Zen! This bed is HUGE!!”, you ran over to it and plopped your face onto the sheets

He chuckled, watching you act like a little kid excited about a hotel for the first time 

his brows furrowed when he realized there was no door separator between your rooms 

He immediately called the front desk 

all you could over hear was “No, there seems to be some kind of mistake” 

and “I reserved two rooms -- conjoined” 

“Alright, ok. Thanks.” and then he hung up. 

“So..” he sighed, “They can’t get another room because they’re completely booked. Someone must’ve recognized the limo and lots of fans immediately bought up all the rooms in hopes of seeing me.”

“It’s alright Zen! I can ask to switch with your agent or something!!” 

“NO!” Zen said a little too loudly. “No. Um, look it would be bad because he’s a man.” 

“Your a dude, too, Zen.” 

“I-- yeah, but that’s different because I’m a guy you can trust.” 

“True..”

“So I’ll sleep on the couch, ‘kay?” 

“Zen, no! You need your beauty sleep to be ready for your performance tomorrow!!!” 

“It’s alright, really!”

“I’ll sleep on the couch!” 

“Like hell you will.” 

“Please :(”

“Y/N, seriously--” 

“Then how about this! You and I just sleep in the same bed!” 

Ever the dramatic soul, Zen gasped with his palm over his heart “How SCANDALOUS!” 

“Aren’t you supposed to be Mr. Playboy?”

“Only for you, baby”, he winked. 

You stuttered, “T-that’s not funny! Seriously don’t make it weird you horn- dog!” 

He threw his head back in laughter, “Horn-dog?! I thought you said you trusted me!” 

“Not when you’re obviously thinking about doing this and that to me!!” 

“Doing this and tha---Hey! Who do you think I am?!”

There was suddenly a loud bang on the wall and a burly man shouted, “GO TO FUCKIN’ SLEEP YOU OBNOXIOUS, SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED LITTLE SHITS!”

You smirked, holding in a laugh saying, “Sounds like your fans are getting jealous.” 

Zen’s mouth dropped and you began laughing hysterically 

“T-that was like a 60 year old man!” 

“I’M 42 YOU LITTLE SHIT” 

You fell back on the bed, laughing louder 

Zen shouted back, “WELL EXCUSE ME, SEXY, 42 YEAR OLD MAN” 

There was silence before a harsh knock sounded at your door 

All Zen’s bravado disintegrated and he made a dash for the bed, whispering loudly for you to “Turn off the fuckin’ lights, turn off the fuckin’ lights!” 

You stifled more giggles rising up to your throat as you clicked off the light, making sure the room was locked, and climbed into bed

you breathed out your last laughs, sighing to yourself contentedly before noticing the close proximity you were to Zen 

You stared at each other for a long moment 

You leaned in closer 

Zen placed a palm on your cheek, gently cupping it

he softly whispered, “Can I kiss you?” 

You answered by harshly connecting your lips

The two of you feeding off each other’s oxygen as Zen bit your lip, causing you to gasp and open your mouth to make way for his tongue 

you whimpered, feeling faint from lack of oxygen

the two of you parted, out of breath 

Zen wanted to say something smooth like “I’ve always wanted to do that.” 

but instead he said “I’ve always wanted to do you.” 

He mentally smacked his head, blaming the lack of oxygen for his stupidity

But you smirked up at him coyly, replying, “Then why don’t you?” 

Um yeah rip your hotel neighbor he will literally hate both of you so much 

I had honestly SO MUCH FUN writing this!! Let me know if you want, like, a part two to this. I think I’d just be so fun lol

[dreamrecorder]

Ok so- idk if you’ve seen demon slayer;; but there’s this episode (it was during the spider fambam arc) aNywaYs- so like. Rui yeets ties* (i guess-) Nezuko like. Up in the air. With his weird spider thread jazz— and like. It’s sHarP weird spider thread jazz— so she’s like. Yknow. Being sliced and diced with string— but it kindaaa reminds me of like. Xiao. And his like.... weird... sad.... uh. Karma. Thing. Like y’know where he’s like hanging from his arms- red stuff. Yeah. So like. Now for the actual request

Xiao’s s/o (female if you don’t mind;;) gets kidnapped by like— the fatui or smth. And they tie her up like Nezuko :D to be like “lol haha Xiao be all like-” and she’s just. Like. Dying. Slowly. Dripping b l o o d and yknow. All the tea. And Xiao comes to rescue her— and he’s like 0-0 “wait...” and he realizes that’s like- exactly what happens to him- and so. He beats the fatui’s butts saves his s/o, anddddd she like.

Idk. This is where I need your angst expertise ❤️ like- she could d i e. In his arms. And poor Xiao would be so scarred omg poor thing- BUT THE ANGST- but at the same time;;;; the f l u f f of him being able to save her just in time and she was like fighting for him the whole time or whatever and ended up needing him to save her anyways- and then Xiao feeding her almond tofu until she gets better ❤️❤️❤️

IM SORRY THAT WAS SO LONG- im probably going crazy from lack of sleep from reading fics for too long sndndnsnsj

But if you do this,,, BLESS YOUR SOUL I HOPE TO EITHER BALL MY EYES OUT OR SQUEAL FROM THE WHOLESOMENESS-

Anyways.... thank you! Have a stellar day~ ✨❤️

The heart yearns and the wind heard

lmao this ask is so adorable i hope you’d enjoy this ksks

anyway, full Angst train up ahead but there are moments of Fluff too. There are mentions of blood and violence if those are not your thing- dont worry guys, this goes with a happy ending cos you and Xiao deserve one~ on a final note- non canon compliant and suuuuuuper long- like- legit this is very long

The Yaksha sighs.

He’s here again. His mind and heart has returned his being into this crimson world his demons have created within him.

He feels it. He feels the corruption binding him tighter again for every death he brings by his tainted hands.

He looks at his bindings. And ever so slowly, the red and black coiling around his person will eventually reach his heart.

One day, he thinks, all this crimson and black in this world will swallow him whole and he will see the light no more.

Xiao sighs again.

This is his karmic debt.

~

The moment you stepped foot within Wangshu Inn, you knew he was in his prison again. After giving a quick greeting to the inn keeper, you hastily went to Xiao’s room. The closer you got, the heavier the atmosphere became.

You reached his door and knocked softly. As expected, no reply as he continues to struggle to take back his control over himself. Without hesitation, you stepped in. To anyone else, they would have instantly met his spear at their throats, but with you, this doesn’t happen. Instead, you see him crouched on the wooden floor with a hand on his chest. His knuckles were white and his breathing was ragged. His amber eyes- lost. Observing his form, yes… his moments of corruption are becoming progressively worse.

With swift steps of familiarity to this routine, you went to him and grasped his shoulders.

“Xiao, it’s me…” You whispered with clarity. And oh- how your voice brought a wave of comfort to his soul.

“N-name…” His voice cracked, but him calling to you is always a good sign.

You gave him a small smile and proceeded to grasp his hands together with yours. After which, you then leaned your forehead to his to chant your prayers. As your prayers progressed, slowly but surely, the corruption begins to fade along with the black mist that covered him. However, you took note how this ritual took longer than the last.

Once everything is done, Xiao just slumped onto your shoulders, still breathing deeply. “How are you feeling?” It was a useless question you asked every time this happens, but you always, always, have to make sure.

Usually, he would mutter a small ‘fine,’ but now- words seemed to have left his mind and all he could muster was an almost-unnoticeable shrug.

Truth be told- his response disheartened you, but you did not show it. Instead, you opted to simply encase him in your arms and caress his hair. After all, these are just one of the few, rare moments Xiao would leave himself into your care. Xiao is aware, himself, that his state has been becoming worse and worse. And you both know, that a day would come when he would just attack anyone- friend or foe- without a trace of hesitation. So, just this time- he speaks his feelings.

“Name?”

You answered immediately with a questioning hum.

“What would you do… when I finally lose control over myself?”

It was very subtle, but he felt how your hand stopped caressing his hair for a second, then proceeded to the previous task at hand again. In all honestly, you can never find yourself having an answer to that question. “And why would I ever let that happen to you?” You questioned back, fully aware that you were dodging his question.

Silence surrounded the two of you, unsure on what to do with the sudden heavier atmosphere.

Not wanting to face the cruelty of the world yet, Xiao simply buried himself on the crook of your neck even more. And despite the ghostly sensation of his lips on your skin, you could feel him mouth the words ‘I love you.’

“As long as I’m here,” you whispered, “nothing can hurt you.” And that was the most beautiful lie that the Yaksha has heard, but he was willing to believe all the same.

~

When word about Fatui diplomats starting a bank reached you, there was a nagging feeling in your head that trouble would bring itself present anytime soon. It was like an itch that wouldn’t get away. And the only way to have that itch gone is to scratch it.

“You are absolutely a fool.” Xiao stated darkly with crossed arms, for once disagreeing with the plans of his master.

“We can never know what their intentions are unless we let them start their bank, no?” Zhongli said as he gazed at the marsh spread beneath him.

The Yaksha only scoffed but said no more.

Building up your courage, you deemed it was your turn to voice out your thoughts, “Um… Rex Lapis, I see your point, but wouldn’t it be best to resolve the problem before it persists into something larger? We all know- All of Teyvat knows, that the Fatui are not to be trusted.”

Your archon offered you a kind smile, “I understand your worries, Name. However, as of the moment, they have not presented themselves as such. If they truly are our enemies, then it would be beneficial for us to know their intentions.”

You frowned deeply at his statement. Seeing you do so, somehow, your archon immediately identified your main concern.

“Is this about the Tianquan assigning you to be her representative for the Fatui?”

The moment those words left his mouth, a growl tore from Xiao’s throat, but he held his tongue.

“Did Ganyu tell you?”

The Archon nodded and you sighed.

“I volunteered, actually.”

And at that point, Xiao vanished into thin hair, but you could still his sense his presence around.

“May I know why?” Zhongli questioned gently.

For a moment, you struggled for words. You didn’t know how to describe this ‘itch’ to him. “At first, it was supposed to be Ganyu, since in the Tianquan’s eyes- Ganyu is an adeptus and she does not know that I am, too. Perhaps she didn’t want to put me in harm’s way, a ‘visionless human’ at the side of a harbinger. After some convincing to Ningguang for my volunteering, I spoke to Ganyu next.

“The adepti are divine beings that walk here in Liyue. I had this feeling that putting a divine next to a power-hungry harbinger would become an issue. I told Ganyu that, since I looked ‘harmless’ and ‘ordinary,’ the harbinger’s interest about the divine would never surface.”

A stretch of silence wrapped around them as Zhongli pondered over your words. “Perhaps, are you also planning to dig out the truth of their arrival?”

You nodded, “I knew you would allow them to stay, so I just took it upon myself to unfurl their secrets.”

“Hmmm… I grant you permission on doing this. However, should trouble arise, do not hesitate to tell us.”

~

The glare pointed at you was strong. Even without him saying a single word, you could hear his phantom voice in your head speak with such coldness, What are you thinking?

You simply gave him a reassuring smile, “I’ll be fine, Xiao. I may be a human in mortal eyes, but please do remember that I am also an adeptus, no matter how weak I am.”

Xiao releases a huff, but still sits by your side at the floor of the balcony, letting the moon kiss his skin. “You’re not weak.” He mumbled as he snaked his hand to yours.

To him, you will never be weak. In fact, you were the strongest being he has ever laid his eyes on. Not physically, no. It was you mental and emotional fortitude. Back during the Archon War, he always admired how you kept your head held up high no matter the suffering you have experienced. No matter how much death surrounded you, you still fought. And that strength made you a survivor. During the war, you never failed to help the wounded. Even when someone dies under your care, you held strong for the departed and for those who are left behind. You were a pillar of hope.

He brings your hand to his lips and kisses every knuckle “… Just be careful. If ever you are in trouble do not-“

“Hesitate to call your name.” You finished, beaming at his words.

~

As someone who used to be a healer and a doctor, you were quite familiar with several mild skin diseases that mortals can suffer from.

If there is an itch, you do not scratch it- for you will only aggravate the area even more.

Now that you’re working alongside the Fatui as the Tianquan’s representative, the itch you kept feeling was only irritated more. Especially whenever you spoke with the Harbinger who goes by the name Childe. And since your work requires you to cooperate with him, you also don’t miss the chance to discover what he hides, should the opportunity presents itself.

Childe… his azure eyes certainly have their… charm to those unaware. However, you knew better. You know he’s capable of drowning you just by his eyes. While he may be a cheerful man, his eyes lack the lustre of joy. The eyes are the windows of the soul, yes? If so, all you see is an unending ocean that you do not want to swim in. The surface may be calm, but the deep is relentless. However, duty bound you are- deep within the ocean, you shall find the secrets the Fatui hides.

Again, another scratch to the itch, but it only irritates you more.

~ 

The news of Rex Lapis’s death became the catalyst of you confronting the Harbinger. From Yujeng Terrace all the way to Northland Bank, you ran (with Ningguang’s permission of course). Before you can even open the door to his office, something caught your eye.

It’s faint, but you’re an adeptus. You sensed elemental traces, just smack bang at the middle of the door. You carefully scrutinized the tracings, and fortunately you knew Snezhnayan script. And what you read only made your heart sink.

It’s ready.

With the adeptal arts, you managed to uncover the origins of these elemental tracings.

Scratch.

Without hesitation, you followed these tracings until it led you into some ruins.

Scratch.

Following the tracings further, you find yourself in a dimly lit room. Wary, you summoned your weapon imbued with your element.

Scratch.

Searching the room, you came across several antique boxes. You opened them.

Scratch.

What you saw were familiar. Too familiar. Dimming the room more with your element, you find more Sigils of Permission hanging on the walls and on the ceilings. The energy within them were faint, but with enough numbers, it’s enough to kill a-

“Well, well well, I thought you’d be there mourning for your Archon. But here you are, snooping around someone else’s research material.”

The sound of his voice made you sharply turn your head to him, your stance now more offensive. “What are you planning?” You bit coldly.

The Harbinger hummed a small tune, “Nothing much… But! If you’re really curious, I guess I could tell you.” He hummed some more but you knew he’s not finished. Once he finished his tune, he grinned to you menacingly and the depths in his eyes became even deeper and darker, “After all, I won’t let you leave this place with you knowing my secret~”

~

There was this one time, Xiao struggled against himself so much, he scratched himself red so that he could anchor himself back to the real world. You remembered how much you cried as he slept in your arms. You never wanted to see him do that again. Seeing him hurt himself also hurt you, too. It was like a stab in the heart, then a twist, and twist some more. A slap in the reality that you might lose him one day.

As he slept, you solemnly observed the wounds he sustained himself to. They were angry red, just like blood.

Now, you, yourself scratched that itch in your head too much into a wound for blood to seep through. You scratched too much and now you have to bleed from it.

~

You were slipping in and out of consciousness. Sleep was tempting you more and more but you know you have to wake up. You were aware that this is going on for days.

Everything hurts. You remembered how his blades, imbued with the Sigils, weakened you thoroughly. Every slash he brought to your body just drained the energy away from you. But still you had to do something.

He wanted an adeptus- he wanted an adeptus in order for the Sigils to grow stronger both in number and in power.

Now here you are, bound by chains and suspended at the middle of this empty room. These chains were adorned by talismans that drained away your energy. You were bleeding from your wounds of your previous battle.

Drip. Drip. Drip goes the blood and pools on the ground underneath you. The ground, you barely noticed, was lined by Liyuean script which enacts the ritual of the Sigils draining your divine power from your blood.

To the eyes of a sadist- you were a picture perfect in a canvas. A dark room lined by the damned Sigils, glowing an eerie gold. Then there's you with your bloodied clothes and chains. The red pool underneath was casting a red glow on your way, giving you a red shade to your pale skin.

Everything hurts-

And everything was driving you mad.

You can also feel the Overlord of the Vortex feed from your energy through the Sigils. You sensed his lust for power and revenge. You felt his anger and the corruption within him. You felt his hatred and his want to bring death. For days that felt like years, you’ve been battling against that very same god in your head. This battle was not something you shall not lose to and failure is not an option. If you fail here, then Liyue will fall. 

This god- he was driving you mad slowly.

If ever you are in trouble, do not hesitate to call my-

You shut the thought from your head. You are not going to call him. You will not speak of him. You will not think of him. You will not call him. Not to this place where his corruption will grow. No. You Will Not Call Him.

If it means that me not calling you will keep you safe from the corrupted remnant of a god- so be it. 

Please

However, no matter how much you denied yourself to call his name, no matter how much your heart yearns to be with him- the wind does not ignore the pained sob that left your lips.

~

Ever since the news of Rex Lapis's death and the visit of the Traveler with a Sigil in his hand- the corruption within him just bloomed into something feral.

The Sigil- there was something wrong about it but Xiao doesn't know what is it that is wrong. Then there's you- where are you? Surely with the news of their Archon's death- it would send you to bring forth a meeting for the adepti to talk this over. But now- for days- you remain not by his side.

With you missing- the demons inside him are slowly taking control over him, taking advantage of his vulnerability for you. For each passing day, it was slow torture for him- The worry bubbling in him was consuming him. He glared at the Sigil between his fingers and not failing to notice how his dark aura covers him once more. 

“Traveler,” Xiao called sharply, “What is it you intend to do next?” 

To any mere mortal, the look his eyes held were enough to strike fear, but the Traveler stealed themselves- meeting the adeptus’s gaze with an equally serious calm. “I have my suspicions on a certain harbinger and I-”

“Where?” The Yaksha growled.

“In the Golden House.”

Without a word nor warning, Xiao placed a hand on the Traveler’s shoulder and teleported them to the place where the Exuvia is hidden.

To the Traveler, everything happened so quickly as one event led to another. One moment, they were standing among unconscious bodies of the Millelith then the next thing they knew a corrupted and demonic gust of wind flew them away to the side. Regaining back their vision, they could see Alatus’s spear now at Tartaglia’s barrier made of Sigils. 

Alatus narrowed his eyes at the floating talismans and began to calculate the flow of this incoming battle with precision and accuracy despite his losing control over himself. 

It was a tense minute of sizing each other up, but eventually, Tartaglia has broken the silence with his annoying innocent voice. 

“Who would have thought that I’d have the honor of fighting another adeptus of Liyue?” 

The question immediately fed the corruption within him, the dark aura exploding at it. He knew that he should not believe in the Harbinger’s words so easily, but the glint in the latter’s eyes held truth. You could be out there, hurting, scared, alone. You could be out there, bleeding out. You could be out there dyi-

His aura exploded once more at the thoughts spreading in his being. With a burst of unspeakable power, Alatus lifted his weapon and pierced the barrier once more, this time breaking it without failure. At the threat, Tartaglia backed away as he donned his mask.

In a similar fashion, Alatus, too donned his mask. “I will ask you once,” the Conqueror of Demons spoke with a deathly calm, “Where is she?”

~

He should have killed him then and there. But the call of the Overlord of the Vortex must not be ignored as it threatens Liyue. 

In the small opportunity of escape, Childe took it. But he was weak and injured as Alatus swiftly threw his spear to block his way and teleported right in front of him. In a show of power, the Conqueror of Demons lifted the mortal by the neck.

“I will ask you again, where is she?”

In fear, Childe told him everything and at his every word, Xiao listened carefully- never speaking once. But the anger within his heart, it boils- it rages. His amber eyes bored into Childe’s soul- thinking what he should do to this mortal. Oh how killing him would be so nice. However, when the Yaksha’s gaze landed on the regal form of the Exuvia, he merely threw the mortal in its way.

“Killing you would have been easier. However, the crimes you have presented against Liyue are not mine for me to judge.

I leave the Harbinger to you... Rex Lapis.”

Once out of the Golden House, the Overlord roared once more, shaking the lands of the nation. However, along with it, he heard the faintest of voices. I’m so sorry... I couldn’t hold him back anymore. 

Only then did the demons in his heart freely took control of him. Just like the stories of old, where the Yaksha walks, death follows. But they were no stories. In his way towards the ruins where you were held captive, every step he took brought carnage and even more death and blood to taint his hands. No Fatui will leave this place alive. The very being of destruction ended many lives. Each death, the demons were growing stronger.

All he wanted now was to kill kill kill kill kill kill kill kill kill kill killkillkill killkill kill killkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkill

Then seeing you suspended in the ceiling and bound by chains. Blood was painted on your lifeless skin. Wounds were littered and bruises were blooming on your form. But most of all, your eyes. What were once full of life and hope- now empty and blank. His demons quieted down.

Broken. You were like a broken porcelain doll.

“N-name...” His voice cracked, not believing it all.

With haste, he quickly broke your binds and caught you in his arms. he was fast to check for your pulse and your breathing. And thank the Archons, you were breathing but barely. You were now walking the line between life and death. With all his might yet a gentle caress, he hugged you for dear life. “Name... It’s me...”

But still, your eyes still held no recognition and it shattered his heart to pieces. With further inspection, he sensed the presence within you. A corruption. A certain evil. 

“Name, stay with me please,” Xiao begged with desperation as he fought back tears. “It’s me who supposed to be the corrupted one between us, not you... I’m not allowing you to leave me, you hear me-”

With a ritual of the adeptal arts, he started purging and purifying the evil left by the god who fed from you. He is not letting you stay alone in your prison, not for a second longer. 

Xiao prays and he never prayed before. Even to his master. But just this once, He prays with desperation. You are the light in his darkness. You are the moon in his night. 

The ritual was a delicate process. For every word he spoke, he was rewarded by your screams of pain and the writhing of your fragile body. He wanted to stop, but he can’t. He had to physically restrain you from trying to escape from his embrace and from hurting yourself. And for every cry you released, Xiao merely shuts his eyes clos just for him not to see your pained eyes. Every now and then, Xiao speaks gentle apologies and words of encouragement for you. You were coming back. But still, the evil persists.

You writhed and scratched against him, until you were creating more wounds for blood to seep through. When it came to a point, you began pleading and begging for him to stop, that was when Xiao had shed a tear. So he continues the ritual, his prayers, and his apologies. They were arriving to a point where the ritual is reaching its conclusion but your screams only grew louder.

Please, just a little more...

Please, just stop...

Please...

The corruption disintegrated away from you in a forceful release of dark energy. He was breathing deeply, attempting to calm his loud heart. When he placed his gaze on you, you were breathing rapidly and your eyes were searching blindly and your hands were desperately holding onto him.

“X-Xiao...” You whispered, “Where am I? Where are you?”

With a sigh of relief, the Yaksha hugged you again closer and his forehead to yours, fearing you would go away again. The action made you lift your hands to his face, still searching blindly.

“I’m here, Name... I’m here.” At his voice, the dam in your eyes broke as you cried silently. Xiao was not adept in emotions, but for you, he will face them gladly. He lets you cry as he gives you soft whispers of assurance, safety, love, and promises. However, you were not crying because of what had happened to you. You were crying for him. After experiencing such corruption-

You sobbed some more- you were this close to him losing you and you could not bring yourself to imagine if your roles were reversed.

“P-please,” you said with a broken voice, “please don’t go to the place where I can’t follow...’

The words, at first puzzled him, but after a few moments, he realized and once more it broke his heart. Bringing you closer, Xiao let loose the tears he was holding back. With a gentleness unexpected of the Conqueror, he simply littered your face with kisses. “I promise if only you would do the same.”

With your smile that he loved dearly for so long you too spoke your promise, “I do.” They were simply two words, but the comfort they bring into the Yaksha’s heart was in volumes.

After that, you shared a few tender moments in each other’s arms. Simply relishing the feeling of their familiar warmth. A little later, Xiao spoke, “Would you like to eat some Almond Tofu once we get home?”

The question made you giggle at his innocence, so you agreed. Despite you needing physical medical attention. But Almond Tofu with him? Yes, you two definitely need some emotional healing.

A/N: fINALLY dONE lmao this was supposed to be short but angst really makes me want to write longer everytime haha~ anyway this request really made me ponder bout genshin stuff with all the corruption this and corruption that but then a question popped up like-

how did childe replicate the sigil of permission? since sigils are imbued with divine energy, i just thought how did this guy accumulate so much sigils to the point of freeing Osial- a god!!! soooo i just played with the idea for a bit then figured out maybe these pieces of paper get the divine energy from a divine source right? and the adepti are divine beings of liyue and another thing- you guys might have noticed the change of names in some scenes- i dont know but i think somehow different names represents different side of a person like- we have childe the cheerful harbinger then tartaglia the power hungry harbinger- there’s Alatus who’s calculating and cold, there’s the Conqueror of Demons who’s ruthless and unforgiving, then Xiao who is calm and humane- lastlyyyyy i might post this in ao3 ksks

[twinkinspector]

Drop some gems drop some gems let's get some precious gemstone knowledge in this houseeeeee

(Unless this is not your area of expertise in which cases the peasants (me) clamour for astrology crumbs)

ehehehe i got you!! i'll list a few of my favorites

citrine

this is a lil orange guy that's a BIG creativity stone. so it helps with manifestation, can get rid of writer's block (👀@ everyone on tumblr), inspiration in general, stuff like that. it's my ADHD medication in crystal form tbh but it's also good for abundance! i put a hunk of citrine in my money bowl every time i refresh it. i have a piece just sitting on my work desk because it's really helped me focus and get shit done! i also rly like it because it's associated with the sun / apollo, who i work with :3

hematite

this guy is VERY underrated imo. hematite looks like a hunk of metal. (tw: medical, blood [but not bleeding]) i have a blood disorder, and this was the stone i worked with the most during the worst part of it. i got a blood clot in my lung last year and had INSANE medical anxiety after i got out of the hospital. so i used to just lay with hematite on my chest (overtop of the lung with the clot). it was traditionally used like this, actually! it's supposed to be good for drawing illness out of the body. but i associate it SUUUUPER heavily with blood issues. BUT it's also good to ground you and can help relieve anxiety

amethyst

this baby is super popular – and for good reason! amethyst helps with anxiety and psychic awareness. it can help with meditation, nightmares, and sleep in general. basically anything having to do with your psyche and mental health! but i use it a lot for divination (doing tarot and stuff). my pendulum is made out of amethyst actually

howlite

my baby..... my love...... my sweet...... i love howlite. i have a howlite bracelet that i wear ALL THE TIME. this is another good mental health stone, but it focuses more on trauma, ptsd, grief...... stuff like that. i carry it as almost a protection against my own brain?? lmao mainly so i don't get sad and spiral in public :')

all of these have a lot of other uses besides what i said, but that's what i use them for / why i like them! there are soooo many others that i like and use often, but those are the highlights hehe

[butwhatifidothis]

🔥 One about your most favorite 3H character and one about your least favorite 3H character

this got a bit long lmao under the cut it goes

Fave: Claude

I've made one of my other unpopular opinions about him - that I don't give a shit about his rendition of the diary scene - pretty clear already, so I guess another unpopular opinion I have is that I also don't really give a shit about his S support?

Like, do I think it - or at least the context before it - could have been done better? Yeah, and I actually added a bit to my rewrite covering that after thinking about this very thing a bit (in the Misc. section, with the jist being that it's more foreshadowed in his route specifically that he's going to leave). But like, the most common complaint with it that I've personally seen is that he thrusts Byleth into a leadership position, but like... what else can realistically happen that would perfectly soothe both characters?

Cuz Rhea's dead, Dimitri's dead, Edelgard's dead - all leaders are dead, and since the game is stupid and doesn't allow side characters to be integral to the main story (meaning Felix, Ferdinand, and Seteth can't just take over these empty roles should they be alive) that leaves exactly two characters left on VW to be able to take on the role of leader of Fodlan: Claude or Byleth. Both of whom, mind, are someone people don't mind being the one to take over, so even with Byleth's inexperience with leading the people still have their faith in them.

And so if we go with the idea that Claude stays and leads Fodlan, Byleth just... does nothing? And just stay his side? Because if Byleth is unqualified to lead Fodlan then she'd be pretty much just as unqualified to lead the Church, so being archbishop is out. Does she stay by Claude's side long enough to pick up leadership skills? But how long would that take? Months, years? And what about Claude? It is specifically his ending with Byleth that shows that the Almyran throne can be taken in as little a time as a few months after he leaves Fodlan, so during that time Claude would most likely lose out on his dream of being able to lead Almyra - and depending on who takes the throne, that could be quite devastating.

So imo, it seems like it's either Byleth gets left in Fodlan to figure out the being the leader thing while Claude sets out to fight for the Almyran throne, or Claude (very likely, especially given the context of specifically Claude and Byleth's paired ending) gives up his dreams of being Almyra's king to stay by Byleth. Or, in a more cynical viewpoint, either Byleth can put on the big-boy pants and learn to lead or Claude falls into the "I'll give up my dreams for you <3" shitty trope.

That being said though their paired ending sucks major ass and I hate it. This is also something I ended up tweaking in the rewrite lmaooo but basically instead of Byleth becoming a useless damsel for Claude to swoop in and save her, having it to where they send correspondence to each other past the border lines (with Claude giving her advice she asks for, eventually growing into them giving mutual support in leadership) would make both a more unique ending and one where Byleth doesn't suddenly become incompetent in the literal one area of expertise they have.

Least fave: Balthus

I. Hate this guy so much lmao. Which might itself be an unpopular opinion, because at least recently I've seen a good bit of love - or at least positive vibes - for the guy. Fuck if I know why, this guy's a total asshole.

And while I have also gotten into this specific reason why I don't like Balthus before, I don't feel like digging for the fairly old post lmao so here it is again: I can't stand his supports with Claude and they account for a solid 70% of the reason at minimum as to why I can't stand him. It's already bad enough that he dangles extremely sensitive information about Claude over his head - which, mind, this is most likely to happen in pre-timeskip, when Claude is at max 18 and Balthis is at minimum 26 - and already it gets even worse when it's revealed that the reason this 26 year old grown ass man is threating someone nearly a decade younger than him is just because he wants to talk to said younger someone's mom who barely knows him, but the cherry on top is that this never gets resolved!

Balthus never takes back his blackmail, even by the end of the support chain - his saying that he Totally Wouldn't Sell Claude Out For Money He Swears is then literally immediately followed by him saying that he wouldn't do that because he "knows" that Claude won't go back on their "promise." That promise that Claude never made and makes clear he never made and that "promise" (read: blackmail) being "I won't rat you out if you let me meet your mom" meaning that Balthus never stepped back and thought "huh, wait a minute, maybe blackmailing someone with extremely sensitive information that could put them in danger is, like, kinda shitty of me to do actually" but no it's just a big haha funny joke don't take it serious guys Balthus is just a hoot n' holler.

It's ass, and I wish I could delete specifically Balthus from the game Doki Doki Literature Club style. Doesn't help that he's a gambling moocher which is a trait that already is kinda hard for me personally to like. I rank him Barely Above Makolov/10 for at least providing some neat bits of lore, if nothing else

[essential-randomness]

Ms. Boba please, do you have any further reading on "1 user paying $50 a month is strictly better than 10 users paying $5."? As an artist with a Patreon I always thought more small contributors were better than few big ones because then it wouldn't be so bad if you lose one? I'd love to be wrong though!

First of all, I just want to stress the idea is a bit more complicated than I made it. Of course, the type of product you can offer for $50 a month is different than the type of product you can offer for $5 a month, and there is a limit to the price people you might want to cater to are willing to pay for whatever you offer . Taking BobaBoard as an example, the fact that I'm interested in serving a specific audience (fandom people) inevitably changes my considerations both for pricing and product. If my goal was maximizing revenue with the minimum amount of customers, then I'd be building e.g. a forum-like platform for influencer to cultivate their own fandom (���). Those customers would definitely pay me way more ""per unit"", and it's a pretty hot market I could probably build a decent product for.

Caveats aside, I do think the broad ideas offer valuable insights for any creator. For further theoretical readings, the concepts of "Minimum Viable Audience" (Seth Godin is its original advocate, and he did an interview on the subject here), or "100 True Fans" (this essay covers it) are a good introduction to the mindset. If you want a more direct "here's why you should raise your prices" essay, this article for small businesses has bullet points covering the general ideas.

(Peddling my own content, I did write about why targeting smaller markets makes for better products in my first newsletter entry. If you do read this one, please let me know if you found it valuable!)

If you do end up googling more about this, just beware that most marketing websites have an overall sale-y tone that is sometimes hard to stomach. But if you can get past that, marketing is a really cool subject whose core goal is to align the incentives of creators with those who find value in their work. I never expected to find it as fascinating as I do, and yet (lmao) I seem to talk more about it than my actual area of expertise.

[keplercryptids]

Hello there! I'm relatively new to GMing and currently designing my first dungeon. I really like your GM tips and wanted to ask you (and your followers) for a bit of advice: long story short, I wanted my players to have a few things to chew on before getting to the important parts and now ended up with much too many rooms that I don't know how to fill. My dungeon is an underground, ancient temple to a (seemingly) evil goddess & also the tomb for her champion. It's rose and sword shaped, the holy symbol of the goddess. But now I'm sitting here with a bunch of empty rooms and don't know what to do. Have you got any tips and/or resources for some inspiration? Thanks in advance!

gotta be honest, in the two years that I've been running my campaign, i think I've made...one dungeon? maybe two? it's just not something i enjoy, so this is definitely not my area of expertise lol.

assuming there's a reason you can't just make the dungeon smaller (maybe with fewer rooms that are large? or by just literally shrinking it a bit), you could make some rooms destroyed/flooded/ otherwise "empty" for narrative or environmental reasons. or if you have lore for this goddess or your world in general, you could have some rooms just contain that lore. of course, you could also throw in some thematic creatures to fight but that's my own personal nightmare so that's why i suggested it last lmao.

if anybody has other ideas, please add 'em!

[woulddieforperrytheplatypus]

My mind was plagued with thoughts of the episode where the kids think Perry laid an egg and the comic where Perry saves a baby platypus from Doof, and that got me thinking: what if Perry was actually a dad to a baby platypus? One possibility is that Perry wouldn't want his child to become an agent at such a young age and would rather have his kid decide if they want to do it when they're older, but I believe that either way, the young platypus would inherit Perry's anthropomorphism.

oh my god I’ve never even thought about Dad!Perry before 🥺 I thought his relationship with the Flynn-Fletcher kids was wholesome but that has some real potential to become the superior relationship

obligatory “read more” to save everyone who doesn’t care how I feel about Dad!Perry

Okay first I gotta ask how we think this would happen. Is it the egg from Perry Lays An Egg that hatches, except it really is a baby platypus and Perry ends up taking it in because no one else can? Or is it Perry taking one of Doof’s platybabies home? Or is it trans!Perry laying his own egg? Or Perry has sex with another platypus (that’s such a weird thought lmao) and somehow he becomes the sole guardian of the egg? As the numero uno “Perry is an asexual demibiromantic platypus” stan, I kinda like the first or second one, but I also feel like the platybaby should be related to him? But at the same time Phineas and Ferb is all about how family don’t end in blood so maybe that’s not important?

Anyways onto Dad!Perry because holy shit I’m excited to explore this

I’m gonna start at the end of the ask by saying that I feel like anthropomorphism isn’t genetically inherited; I feel like it’s something that’s taught. It’s kinda a nature vs nurture type thing so I guess it’s more a psychological debate than anything, but if I had to channel my inner English teacher and draw evidence from “the text” (aka the show), I gotta bring up the koi from Attack of the 50 Foot Sister that were just kinda vibin in the neighbors’ pond at the beginning of the episode and then Monogram had to make them agents to avoid a lawsuit and by the end they were saving Perry’s ass? Which is relevant to literally nothing except that I think any baby animal Perry raises, regardless of whether or not they’re related to him by blood (or even by species), will probably turn the lil baby into an anthropomorphic lil platybaby just because of all the human and human-like influences

And now the elephant in the room (cue OWCA Files Agent E joke): how does OWCA react to the news? Which I guess is really a follow-up question to how OWCA finds out in the first place. I think we can all agree that Perry won’t want to tell them. It’s not like he sees the other agents as friends that he wants to invite to the baby shower. But Monogram would want to know if there’s a new player in the Flynn-Fletcher house not that he knows who lives there now; that’s Carl’s area of expertise. Would he have to tell them? Is there a protocol for that? Especially if it’s just an egg he picks up from The Tree™ in the backyard. That’s basically just getting a new pet, right? And sure, Monogram would want to know, but is Perry legally obligated to tell him is the question.

But Monogram has to find out one way or another, and given that Perry is the best of the best, Monogram is going to want his kid in the club. Perry would 100% say no, too, but I don’t know if it would be because he wants his son (yes it’s a boy platybaby no I don’t know why) to have his own say in his future; I think Perry would consider OWCA too dangerous for his son. I mean, we saw what happened when Phineas, Ferb, and Candace got mixed up in his job: they were almost eaten by a goozim and the tri-state area was almost taken over by an evil dictator. He would definitely want to keep his son out of that scene if he could. At least all the dangers at home are Phineas-and-Ferb-sponsored, and unlike OWCA, they would make sure he didn’t get hurt.

Buuuut Monogram is also a dumbass and doesn’t know how to take no for an answer, so he’d keep pushing. It has to be a well-known fact around OWCA that changing Agent P’s mind about anything is not an easy feat, so maybe when Monogram realized it was a lost cause, he’d try to go around Perry’s back? Maybe while Perry was at work, he’d head to the Flynn-Fletchers’ house (or send Carl again like Undercover Carl) to try to get the platybaby alone? He could explain what OWCA is and that he would make a perfect candidate. I doubt Perry would have told his son about OWCA in any detail yet other than the fact that he works there and that’s where he goes every day, so this would all be new and interesting. And then Perry either comes home when Monogram or Carl is talking to his son about OWCA or his son brings it up himself, and Perry is fuming because he made it very clear that he didn’t want OWCA anywhere near his family. 

And now I can’t help but wonder if that would cause bigger problems between him and OWCA? What if that’s his breaking point, and he just flat-out quits because if they can’t respect his very few boundaries, he doesn’t owe them anything? And assuming the platybaby didn’t come from Doof, maybe that’s how they meet? Somehow he finds out that the reason there’s a new agent working his case is that Perry’s out on “permanent paternity leave” or something, and word gets back to Perry somehow (maybe Pinky heard it through the grapevine and told him? idk) that Doof wants to meet him? And Perry’s kinda wary buuuuut at the same time, Doof isn’t his nemesis anymore. If you take OWCA out of the equation, aren’t they just friends? 

WAIT A SECOND

IMAGINE HOW NORM WOULD REACT TO SEEING A BABY PLATYPUS

LIKE

I DON’T KNOW WHY

BUT NORM WOULD ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS BABY PLATYPUS

and Doof would get kinda annoyed because “He came here so I could meet the baby, you know,” and usually that’s enough to convince Norm that he’s doing something wrong, but this time Norm is just like, “But I love him?” And Doof expects Perry to back him up and he probably should but at the same time, his son looks so happy with Norm? Without OWCA’s training, he still has that platypus aspect to his personality that comes from both his animal instinct and how the Flynn-Fletchers treat him, so he’s just kinda snuggled up in Norm’s lap and Norm is just petting him?

And this is probably after he’s shown some human-like features and Doof knows that he’s about as human as Perry, so he asks, “Does he like being pet?” and Perry nods because duh of course he does and Doof just kinda looks at him for a moment and he’s like, “Do you like to be pet?” and Perry just fuckin decks him because no he does not yes he does and Doof just nods like, “Okay, fair enough.”

AND THEN VANESSA WALKS IN???

and she had absolutely no idea this was happening she’s about to go drop her stuff off in her room for the weekend and Norm’s like, “Look at my new friend!” and Vanessa thinks it’s gonna be something stupid but she walks over and sees the baby platypus and she starts freaking out because holy shit Perry is that yours? and obviously she needs to know literally everything there is to know about him because this is her nephew now and she will not take no for an answer.

And I feel like OWCA really wouldn’t like this? I mean, Perry completely severed ties with them over this platybaby, and now he’s bringing his son over to DEI at least twice a week to see his former nemesis? And idk what they would do about it because I don’t think there’s an actual protocol for this, but Monogram is Very Sensitive™ and he won’t stand for this.

Also and I’m totally just spit-balling here but what if, because the platybaby is kinda also being raised by the Doofenshmirtzes (and the Flynn-Fletchers but idk if that would make much of a difference here bc he has to pretend to be a mindless pet around them like his dad), he gets the best of the human and animal experience all in one, without all the shit Perry had to deal with from OWCA? And what if that somehow leads him to be able to speak? I don’t quite know how that would work, mostly because I don’t really know what prevents Perry from speaking, but we already went into that back in May so I’m not gonna go there again lol

okay I’m pretty sure it’s been over two hours since I started working on this ask but I can’t help it because this is literally such a cute idea fjdshflakfa I don’t even know if I’d be content reading this like I feel like this is just something I want to write. I kinda want to see how Phineas and Ferb would treat him, and if they’d treat Perry any differently now that a) he’s a dad and b) there’s a new platypus for them to love. I also want to see how Candace would handle probably falling in love with the platybaby but still getting annoyed by Perry. I really want to see what Vanessa and Norm’s relationship with the platybaby would turn into. Idk so much about the Doof/platybaby relationship though; I feel like I’d be more interested in how this affects the Doof/Perry dynamic instead. Something about Doof makes me think he wouldn’t be as easily swayed by the platybaby as everyone else, but the fact that Perry would now be a dad just like him would probably make him unreasonably happy. And that’s not even touching upon how different life would be for Perry now that he has a son, and he would obviously adore the little guy with his entire being, but, like, he has a son? How is he supposed to deal with that?

also I really should’ve given the platybaby a name to make this more readable and it’s a little too late for that but I hereby decree that his new temporary name until such time as this fic gets written is Horatio (unless y’all wanna hit me up with your platybaby name ideas because I would love to see them?) so welcome to the Dwampyverse, Horatio :,)

[frenchy-and-the-sea]

I NEED 👑 for the twins. For reasons. Also 💎🏡 for Tahir pls

These are super late because I’ve been stupid busy but thank you!!

👑 If your OC was made royal (or is royal) how would they use their power? Are they a good leader or bad? Do their subjects like them or is it ‘off with their head’? Do they enjoy being royal?

Let’s all be very honest with ourselves and realize that the twins would be terrible royalty and would honestly hate it overall, okay? Okay. 😂

I mean, they’re not actually terrible with authority per se?? Davin especially gets a taste of it, and they’re both 1) pretty good at decision making in topics they know a lot about and 2) are willing to fight for what they believe is right. But they only have expertise in a few niche areas, and they take a long, long time to warm up to people enough to take their advice if they’re experts in a field, so something as many-hatted as RULING royalty is definitely NOT for them. If forced into the role, Davin is the weird eccentric who hides himself away in a tower and lives alone and can’t be fuckin’ bothered to deal with things. And Finn? Finn’s hedging on an incident with the kingdom next door because he can’t keep his mouth shut at a dinner party. So. No, LMAO.

💎 Does your OC collect anything? Is there a reason? When did they start and is it beginning to turn into a little bit of a hoarding issue? What do they do with their collection?

Tahir doesn’t do much collecting, tbh? He has only a very small scrap of floor to call his own, so material possessions aren’t really viable for him. That said, he does still have ever gift that his sisters have ever sent him - most of which are navigation tools long since broken or interesting coinage they come across or small assortments of ribbon or fancy cord to tie his hair back in. 

When he does eventually settle down, though, he does collect books. He never quite makes it to Jon’s level of hoarding, but it’s the one thing he sort of keeps an eye out for whenever he gets the chance. He and his wife bond over their love of stories too, so it’s a collection with a very good use!

🏡 Describe your OCs ideal house! Give us a tour around! What’s their garden like? Their bedroom? Kitchen? Where is it and how many people live there?

Okay, the really sad part about this is that I think Tahir just always pictures his family’s home whenever he thinks of an ideal living space. You know, the one that his going away to sea helped get them? The one he’s never spent more than a few months living in at a time? Yeeeeah. For such a big dude, he has a fondness for the cozier confines of a small, rural home out past the edges of a larger city, with a big overgrown garden and a kitchen that is always full of people. In my mind, it’s a little cobblestone house built for like four people tops and there’s at least six or seven of them there at any one time. The kitchen can fit like, MAX two people at once, but they’ve perfected the art of circling around table/counter space to prepare big meals. It’s just a very loud, busy place and ohhhhh I’m starting to realize exactly why Tahir gets on with being on a ship so well..... HUH

[muertawrites]

Muggle Magic (George Weasley x Reader)

Summary: George Weasely hires a squib to help him out in the shop, only to learn that magic doesn’t always require a wand. 

Word Count: 3,100

Author’s Note: Remember when I said I was gonna post this a few days ago? lmao that was clearly a lie. But it’s finished! And I’m actually really proud of it and I promise I’m not gonna delete this one like the last couple fics I’ve posted because I’m convinced that this one doesn’t suck! I might also be posting more regularly now since I started a new antidepressant that actually makes it so that I want to do productive things with my time and constant need for escapism. I hope you like my first Wizarding World fic because there will be more, considering its the one fandom I let myself get somewhat obsessive about. Enjoy, dearies~ 

                                             ~ 💀🌸 Muerta 🌸💀

( masterlist )

Working for George Weasley brought magic back into your life. 

He hired you a little over two years ago, and to say he took a chance on you was an understatement; you were a squib - come to London to get a master’s degree in the hopes of becoming a muggle historian - who had stumbled into Diagon Alley in an attempt to reconnect with your magical roots. You’d stepped into Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes during a rare moment of calm when the shop was empty and, noticing the history books peeking out of your bag, George struck up a conversation with you, mentioning his father’s long-lived love of muggle culture. 

Despite the stigma you carried, your first conversation with George offered him a shortened version of your life’s story; how you convinced your family to send you away to a muggle boarding school when your letter to a magical institution didn’t arrive by the time you turned eleven, spending your teenage years learning everything there was to know about living outside the magical world. He enjoyed your wit and passion, your lively intelligence, the comfort you had with yourself in the face of discretion, and, deciding that keeping anyone else around would be a bore after making your acquaintance, offered you a part-time position in the shop to help pay your way through grad school. 

Of course, your adjustment to the magical world after years separated from it was a challenge.

George kindly let you live in the apartment above the shop, taking rent out of your pay so that you didn’t have to bother converting such a large portion of your income into muggle money every month. Work, however, was a much more significant struggle; having no wand to help you manage the store and its immense inventory, you had to arrive early to most of your shifts in order to organize and replace product by hand, often putting yourself in danger traversing the stock room’s stories-tall ladder. After a particularly terrifying fall in which you narrowly avoided death, George took it upon himself to get you some help where genetics had failed you; he enchanted about a thousand paper cranes to pull stock for you, retrieving and storing anything you needed on command. 

“With them around, what do you need me for?” you’d teased him, quietly thankful for his care to ensure no loss of life or limb would befall you under his watch. 

“Eh,” he’d grinned, “they could never agitate me quite as well as you do.” 

Though it was odd returning to a world you could never fully be part of, working for George Weasley made the vertigo of reassociation fun. He always had some sort of funny little trick up his sleeve, be it something malicious, like slipping sugar cubes into your tea that made your hair turn into ostrich feathers or jinxing the cash register to shoot fireworks at random when opened, or something winsome, like making it snow inside as the winter holidays approached or enchanting your textbooks so that their lessons leapt off the page, playing out before you in a theater of paper mache. He engaged you in his own work, inquiring your aid in developing new products, and was deeply interested in yours, enraptured with your retellings of a history he was unaware took place so near to his own. He even brought you books on magical history from Flourish and Blotts, stopping weekly on his way into work, suggesting you consider taking up the practice of teaching the subject.

“Seriously, you should look into it,” he told you. “If I’d had you instead of Professor Binns, I might’ve actually cared enough to pass a class.” 

During slow hours, you and George would sit at the counter and eat lunch together, talking about everything and nothing and anything else in between. You told George about your childhood; how, growing up, you dreamed of doing things you would never be able to do, the horror you felt having your life’s path ripped from under you at such a young age, how you managed to find yourself again through art and history and literature. He told you about his own youth; the boisterous years of his life spent at Hogwarts, the incredible fantasies and ambitions he and his brother would dream up during late nights spent awake in their shared bedroom, the gaping hole his twin’s absence left in his soul the night he died. George was fourteen years your senior, but you were able to laugh and grieve with him as easily as if you’d been born a day apart. 

You loved working with George. Being a part of Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes gave you a sense of belonging you’d never felt before; You often felt caught between the magical and muggle worlds, standing in the threshold between the two but never able to set foot into either. In the shop with George, however, you could exist without conflict - the halves of your universe were indistinguishable from one another, and for once in your life you finally felt whole. You’d found your home in the last possible place you ever expected to.

As much as you loved the shop and your employer, there were certain things about your job that drove you absolutely insane - namely, the parchment bookkeeping system. It was true that all things ancient and antique were your area of expertise, but trying to keep track of a business with nothing but quills, ink, and a stack of heavy, leatherbound volumes was what you envisioned was similar to experiencing the ninth circle of Hell. Opening and closing every day took ages, and George’s office was so cluttered with paperwork that finding anything amongst his things required a full-fledged expedition into every cabinet in the building. Fed up with the chaos, you decided it was time to bring the wizarding world (at least the corner of it you occupied) into the Twenty-First Century. 

“What the hell’s all this?” 

George furrowed his brow in bewilderment as he traversed the stairs into his office, where you were seated at his desk in front of a shiny new Mac. 

“A computer!” you told him, grinning. “We’re going to use it to help run the books. I sent an owl to your dad asking if he had anything like it laying around his shed; he sent this over last night.”

“So it’s a muggle thing,” George assumed, setting his briefcase beside the monitor as he pulled up a chair beside you. 

You nodded. 

“I’ll teach you how to use it. I’ve been here since six scanning files into it; we’ll be able to access and keep the books in order much easier now.” 

You opened the spreadsheet you’d made outlining the last quarter’s numbers, smiling proudly as George’s eyes widened in awe. 

“That’s incredible,” he said, leaning in to inspect the screen. “But what about our ledgers? How can this thing hold all of that information?” 

You giggled at his curiosity, thinking it a bit adorable how out of touch he was. 

“I’ve kept the ledgers so we still have physical records of everything,” you explained, “but having it all at hand on the computer will make the boring parts of the business a lot easier. I’ve got everything matched up with my laptop, too, so I can open and close quicker and all the numbers will be sent right to you.” 

George quirked a brow. 

“Laptop?” 

“It’s a small version of a computer,” you told him. “The screen and the keyboard” - you pointed each of these parts out - “fold together like a notebook so I can take it with me wherever I go.” 

George shook his head, clearly baffled by the complexity and convenience of muggle technology. 

“Blimey,” he mused. “I never would’ve guessed muggles could do all this without magic. It’s bloody brilliant.” 

You rolled your eyes, smiling to yourself as you gathered one of the volumes you’d been searching through and returned it to its place on the wall of shelves overlooking George’s desk. 

“You need to give us more credit,” you bantered. “Muggles are a lot more magical than you’d think.” 

The rest of the morning was spent digitally organizing documents and giving George a crash course in computer science, by the end of which he considered himself an expert in the subject. When the shop opened at noon, you could barely pull him away from his desk. 

Aside from the morning’s excitement, the rest of the day ran as usual. You spent the afternoon fluttering around the building, keeping and moving inventory while George used the weekday calm to hole himself up in his workshop and concentrate on new product. By the time evening rolled around you were adequately exhausted, deciding to settle behind the counter with a book and a cup of tea while you waited to close. 

“You said something earlier,” George announced as he finally returned down the stairs - the first time you’d seen him in hours - “about muggles and magic. I can’t seem to figure out what you mean.” 

“Good evening to you, too,” you greeted him, glancing up from your book and shooting him an amused grin. “What’s got you confused?” 

George hoisted himself up onto the counter, turning so he faced you and folding his legs beneath him. For someone fresh into his early forties, he still acted much like you imagined he did as a teenager. 

“You said that muggles were magical,” he reminded you, “but you can’t be, really. Not without… well, y’know, magic. I can’t see what can be so magical about a world that doesn’t have what ours has.” 

You shut your book, setting it in your lap as you searched for the right words to describe what you were thinking. 

“It’s not… magic in the magical sense,” you attempted, earning a strange look from George. “Muggle magic is more about… defying the odds than doing the impossible. It’s also about how things make you feel. Things people have done and created… situations and experiences that inspire awe; that make you feel like you’re living outside the regular world.”

George continued to gaze at you, his eyes narrowing as he attempted to process what you were trying to convey. 

“Like what?” he wondered. 

You thought for a moment, folding your arms over your chest and leaning back into your chair. 

“... Cathedrals,” was the first thing that came to mind. “When you stand in the center of a cathedral that’s been standing for hundreds of years, and you think about how incredible it is that something so lasting and beautiful could have been created by people who had so little in resources compared to what we have today. 

“Or music. Like, how does something as simple as sound cause us to feel so much emotion? A good song can make you feel joy or bring you to tears and can connect strangers to each other in such an intimate way. I think it’s the most magical thing we have.”

George smirked at you. You noticed a new brightness in his eyes when your gaze met his, and you watched, bemused, as he slid off the counter and onto his feet, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“What else?” he asked. 

“Medicine,” you replied. “We can cure things most people died of fifty or sixty years ago. We can replace our organs if they’re not working properly - there are even labs that are working to grow organs outside of the human body or replace those that don’t work with artificial ones. We can even change the way we look if we want.

“And,” you stood up, pulling a pen out of the vase you used to hold quills beside the register, “there’s technology. Muggles have incredible technology! I mean, look at this - millions of people in this world who possess the ability to perform magic and yet you’re all still using quills you have to re-dip in ink.” 

George chuckled at you, leaning in as he took the utensil from your hand, his fingers brushing against yours and leaving a delicate tingle in their wake. You couldn’t help but blush, glancing down at your feet before looking back up at him. 

“I appreciate your sentiment, love,” he teased, “but I don’t think a pound store pen is going to inspire awe in anyone - magical or otherwise.” 

You scoffed, rolling your eyes.

“You know what I mean,” you said, taking the pen back from him and returning it to its place. “Muggles are incredible, and we’re incredible without magic making everything so easy for us.” 

George, who still loomed close above you, placed a hand against his chest in feigned shock, his jaw dropping and eyes growing dramatically wide. 

“Easy?” he taunted, his expression brightening ever so slightly as you grinned amusedly up at him. “You think magic makes everything easy? I’ll have you know, I nearly blew us to smithereens today trying to perfect our latest Whizbangs design. Bringing joy to people’s lives is extremely difficult and dangerous work, which you should respect me for, little darling.” 

You smirked at him, letting out a soft chuckle as you crossed your arms and leaned back against the counter.

“Your stupidity with pyrotechnics is no one’s fault but your own, Georgie,” you joked, to which he gave you a tickling pinch in your side and scooped you over his shoulder as you bent down to fend him off. You squealed with laughter as he spun you around, setting you down atop the stairs when he felt you’d had enough. He sat on the step below you, giving your knee an affectionate pat. 

“... You know, I do think there’s a type of magic we wizards share with muggles,” George said after a period of comfortable silence. “That is, if you muggles feel human emotion like the rest of us.” 

You playfully shoved his shoulder, and he grinned mirthfully as he slouched comfortably into the side of your body. 

“And what is that?” you inquired. 

“Joy,” George answered matter of factly. He leaned closer into you, looking out over the empty, dusk-lit shop as he allowed his thoughts to guide his voice. “I don’t think… I’ve ever felt joy like I used to since Fred died. Not until you showed up, anyway. Having a laugh with you almost feels the same as it did with Freddie. I’ve missed that feeling… and no magic could ever replace it.” 

You hummed thoughtfully, wrapping an arm around his broad shoulders as a gesture of comfort. 

It was odd, you thought to yourself, working with George. He was your boss, but you had a hard time seeing him that way; Ever since he helped you move in upstairs, you’d seen him as a friend, and you knew simply by the way he looked at you that he saw you the same. You could hardly call what you had with him a business relationship - it hadn’t started that way, even from the moment you met him, and the more time you spent in his company, the more its trajectory changed into something much deeper and more significant. 

It suddenly dawned on you that you loved him - in a way no one should ever love their much older employer and landlord. 

As if sensing the way your heart dropped, fluttering wildly, into the pit of your stomach, George pulled away from you, taking your hand gently in his and stroking your knuckles with his thumb. 

“You went silent,” he noticed. “You never go silent.” 

You grinned a little, shame creeping into your features as a hot, blistering blush. 

“I was just thinking,” you told him. “... Do you think love is another type of magic?” 

George blinked, pondering the idea. 

“Of course,” he finally answered. “Love is what won the war.” 

You nodded, looking down at his fingers wrapped around your palm and twining them with yours. 

“Your love for Fred is what keeps him alive,” you said. “I never met him but I always feel him here because of you. He’d be proud.” 

George swallowed heavily; you could hear the tension in his throat, could feel the weight of hesitation pressing in the small space between you. You peered back up at him, meeting his brown eyes that watched you intently. 

“Your passion is what gives you magic,” he murmured. “You don’t need a wand or any kind of innate ability to do it for you. I’ve realized… that’s the reason I love you. Among all else.” 

Though you sensed the words were coming, they still hit you like a speeding lorry. 

You stared at him, shaken, the last breath you took trapped in your chest. You had no idea how to respond. Should you tell him that you loved him, too? Should you be rational and tell him that this was inappropriate for a business owner and his subordinate? Should you kiss him? Every part of you wanted to kiss him; had been wanting to for a very, very long time. 

You raised the hand that wasn’t twined with his up to his cheek, grazing your thumb over the warm, tender flesh there. Your fingers grazed the scar where his ear used to be, getting twisted in the tendrils of his amber red hair that framed the sides of his handsome, familiar face. You leaned forward and kissed him, the sensation of his lips at last touching yours causing an explosion throughout every nerve of your body. Despite the beauty of the moment, you couldn’t help but wonder to yourself, My god, if kissing him feels like this, I can’t wait to feel what sex with him is like. 

George pulled away after what felt like equally too long and not long enough, giving you a dopey, lidded-eyed smile that made your heart combust all over again. You hated the feeling, but never wanted it to stop. 

“Would you kiss me like that every day if I asked you?” George wondered, sounding so dreamy and unlike himself it took you somewhat aback. 

You nodded, squeezing the hand that was still wrapped so intimately around his. 

“Every day,” you assured him. “It’s the best kind of magic you could ever show me.” 

George grinned, playfully tapping his finger against the tip of your nose which - in a testament to how far your relationship had already crossed the line - he knew you would hate, chuckling as he watched you flinch away from him. 

“Just wait ‘til I perfect those Whizbangs,” he told you. “Then we’ll talk.” 

[samatok-i]

sooooo this is my first request here so I spent 737484647 hours thinking on what would be a good start but I think I'll settle for something simple,, may I request first date headcannons for the boyes?

I APOLOGIZE FOR THE WAIT TUMBLR RLLY LET ME HAVE IT!!! blease accept these qwq (im breaking them up by division so the post wont be so cluttered :0)

💫 Allstars on a First Date Pt. 1💫

♡Buster Bros♡ :

Ichiro: 

-He wants to take you to the movies! He’s not picky at all about what you guys go to see because he’s the kinda guy to enjoy the experience no matter what kinda movie it was! He’d love to talk about it afterwards with you if the movie was trash or if it was really good! (when he saw Into the Spider-verse with his bros he raved about it for days) 

-(his fav spidey person is Peni cuz he’s a slut for mecha anime)

-If you wanted to pick the movie that’d be totally fine with him! (unless theres a new movie adaption of an anime he wants to see- he’d agree with your choice but you can see the Longing in his eyes as he walks past the poster and you just might hafta give in lmao)

-Definitely pays for your snacks and drinks even if you protest because he’s a huge sweetheart (need me a MANS)

-He’s no scrub either he goes for the large drink, the large popcorn. AND king size m&ms??? Do you even deserve him????? No baby I’ll hold the food tray you’ve done enough 😤

-He finds y’all good seats and takes the tray so you can get comfortable before doing so himself and immediately going to demolish the popcorn before the previews end because he’ll always be a rebel at heart

-During the movie he (subtly but not Really) shifts closer to you and occasionally leans over or puts his hand on your shoulder lightly to whisper a joke or a thought he has about the movie in your ear (stay calm Reader-chan)

-You sorta spend the rest of the movie whispering jokes and making witty comments and giggling to yourselves like adult children and Ichiro thinks your laugh when your trying not to laugh is cute

-If something funny happens during the movie he’ll laugh loudly, if something sad happens you’ll hear him sniffling into his jacket sleeve and if something scary happens he’d keep that to himself but the way the his voice wavers when he asks if you’re okay kind of gives him away (he will Jump at the opportunity to hold your hand if you ask)

-He asks to stay after the credits because he cannot miss any after credits scenes its not in his blood, that’s not the kinda man he is

-After the movie is officially over he beats you to throwing away the trash and putting the tray back

-Would also immediately fire off about what stuck out to him in the movie and what he thought it lacked and ask your thoughts about it with a glimmer in his eyes

-He set a curfew for himself that he told his brothers he’d be back by but you both have a few more hours to kill so he asks if you wanted to grab dinner somewhere

-The place he takes you too isn’t fancy or high class, it’s just a nice, warm family diner he takes Jiro and Saburo to sometimes- he promises you’ll like it! (the place is also very special to him yknow)

-”If you don’t like it you never hafta go out with me again!” he joked but when you told him in all seriousness that you wouldn’t do that to him, some sort of tension fell away from his demeanor and he laughed warmly (relieved even) and said how that was real sweet of you

-Ichiro makes good conversation over dinner- he treats you like that he would an old friend or someone close to him and makes sure you stay engaged in the conversation just as much as he is

-After dinner (he pays of course- he was quick to whip out his wallet) you both make your way outside of the restaurant and you notice how he starts to fidget by rubbing the back of his neck and shifting his weight from each leg

-He asks if you had a good time and when you tell him you did (you Better) he visibly lights up, all traces of nervousness leaving him and his smile is big and its adorable

-(If you tell him that he wouldn’t know what to do other than stutter out a shocked thank you as his cheeks color)

-He says maybe you guys could go out again sometime? If you want? It’s totally chill if you don’t tho.

-When you say yes you didn’t think his smile could get any brighter and you realize how nice it makes you feel. How fuzzy.

-”Okay cool! That’s awesome! I’ll talk to you later alright? Be careful on your way home!”

-When you respond he starts fidgeting again like he wants to say something else and when you’re about to ask him what was up he quickly pecks your cheek before you could even register how close he had gotten. If his face wasn’t red before it definitely is now

-”I’ll call you okay? G’night!” he waves as he’s leaving and his big smile never leaves his face

Jiro:

-It’s arcade time! That would definitely be his first choice on where to take you

-Ichiro insists Jiro bring you over before y’all leave and although Jiro would love for his Niichan to meet you he can’t say the same for that little rugrat he’s forced to share a home with

-Of course he brings you anyway because Ichiro really wanted to meet you and Jiro can’t just say no to his older brother like that (Ichiro made Saburo promise to behave and he did so while wrinkling his nose and shooting Jiro a look behind Ichiro’s back and Jiro shot him a smug look in kind- Ichiro caught that one though and flicked his ear)

-When you reach the front door of the Yamada residence the door swings open before you could even knock

-Ichiro greets you warmly and eagerly ushers you inside telling you how much he’s wanted to meet you because “Jiro talks about you a whole lot yknow!” (Jiro makes a strangled noise of betrayal and his face goes red)

-You get an excited introduction from Ichiro and a less excited more being polite out of obligation introduction from Saburo (who’s about to make a quip at how Jiro even got someone to go on a date with to which Ichiro pushes Jiro towards you and says how you both ought to be going- “Also don’t forget about curfew got it? Have fun!”)

-When y’all make it to the arcade and get your game cards (they’re still tokens in my Heart) Jiro asks what game you wanna hit first and then y’all just sorta take turns dragging each other around

-His personal favorite games are 1v1 fighting games, racing games and dancing games- he loves the competition they bring and if you challenge him it’ll totally pump him up “You’re gonna regret it when I kick your ass!” 

-You guys go around the arcade with a new fighting spirit and try to kick each other asses at almost every game. Basketball, air hockey, hell even wack-a-mole- theres no holding back on any of them

-After you guys’ 3 round long dance battle you announce that you need a Break and he agrees (his jock ass could go for a few more rounds but he don’t wanna leave you out)

-He buys you a drink of your choice because he was informed that that was the Manly thing to do (”gentlemanly” was the word used but technicalities, technicalities) and asked if you’re down to get some food 

-Y’all both go for pizza (unless dear Reader is lack toes of taller ants then he wouldn’t mind letting you pick)

-You guys just share a big platter because Jiro’s funds are limited but he’d still like to treat you

-You guys laugh more often than you chew and take silly videos of each other eating to post on social media until you both decide that it was time to make more rounds around the arcade

-When it’s time to exchange game points for prizes Jiro loses his impulse control (read: non-existent) and picks out a bunch of dumbass shit

-”Bro I’ve wanted a kazoo for so fuckin’ long it ain’t even funny”

-If you want something a little higher on the points list but don’t have enough for he’d put back some of his shit (goodbye Creeper plushie) and say y’all could try combining points

-When its about time to leave Jiro clumsily says that he could walk you home- if you want! It comes out rougher than he intended and he can feel his face heating up but he’s determined to hold eye contact with you until you give him an answer

-He walks home with you until you both reach the front door of your place (also like how he was informed) and says he had a real good time and that y’all should definitely go again…y’know if you want…or whatever…

-You tell him you do and his face is Priceless (shock turning into something more like joy until he schools his features to look less like an excited puppy)

-Now unsure of how to end the conversation without being awkward he settles for the Bro Clap on your shoulder (totally not awkwa r d) and promises to get at you later 

-”I’ll dm you later ok? See ya!” he turns leaving you with a cool wave over his shoulder but he has the biggest grin on his face

Saburo:

-Oh god Saburo’s first date

-It’s his first date

-”Baby’s first date haha” “Shut up, maggot”

-He’s so nervous please help him

-He doesn’t have a clue how he was able to invite you out for the weekend let alone get away with calling it a date

-He’d be stroking his big fat ego if he didn’t feel like he was going to collapse- but he’ll be fine he has to be

-After all it’s just the aquarium! He actually likes the aquarium unlike the idiotic suggestions The Lesser One gave him (he would never go to the mall by choice). But he found the specimens kept at the aquarium to be interesting.

-Also Ichiro said he’d “chaperone” as his support (which Saburo would have never asked his Ichinii to do so in any other situation but…it’s a date. This is not his area of expertise. No matter how much research he had done on what to do and what not to do his anxiety never went away.)

-The plan was to meet the Yamada brothers at the aquarium and sure enough you couldn’t miss the two freakishly tall boys (one waving with both hands and the other meekly raising one hand in greeting)

-Ichiro took the lead, introducing himself on the way in and thanking you for taking care of Saburo (Saburo’s cheeks may have tinged a light pink at that)

-After making your way in Ichiro said he’d get out of y’alls hair and to text him if you needed anything

-Then you were both alone

-Saburo squashes the feeling of unease settling in his stomach and whips out a map of the building, asking if there was an exhibit you’d like to see first and then set off when you’ve made your pick

-At the exhibit he finds himself wanting to tell you what he knows about this particular species but he doesn’t want to annoy you or seem like he’s bragging about his knowledge (thats what kids at school usually assume- and although he Is known to brag he also like to share facts for fun)

-He starts slowly, “You know these animals are actually very interesting..”

-When you turn away from the exhibit to look at him and prompt him to speak more he’s actually startled and stutters a bit before continuing 

-You tell him that what he said was interesting and these animals were cooler than you thought!

-Oh. Oh.

-Saburo’s face feels warm as he opens the map again

-You guys laugh at the otters, marvel at the jellyfish and pet the little stingrays (Saburo was honestly a little reluctant at first but you coax him into it easily and the smile he wears when he touched one is a sweet little thing)

-He was becoming more eager to share his random information with you and you were just as entertained to listen

-He also laughs with you if you point out something funny the animals are doing

-”Hehe T-Pose crab.” “T-Pose cr a b” (these r what kids b talkin about dont @ me)

-He found himself loosening up around you qwq

-You guys eventually reach the gift shop and Saburo’s immediately drawn to these little sting ray plushies (they remind him of Mantyke from pokemon hehe) and he really wants one but…should he? In front of you?

-You catch him staring at them and then get a crazy idea: you both get one

-His cheeks flush immediately and before he can protest with something stupid you pick one up and give it to him while taking one for yourself. 

-Saburo was so caught off guard that he almost forgot to offer to pay (its Gentlemanly, Jiro, not Manly you fucking imbecile-)

-(Regardless MC BB taught them well)

-After you both snap a pic of your matching pokemon plushies, Saburo texts Ichiro asking if he could take you guys to McDonalds and Ichiro is fucking on it bro

-You all leave to get some McNuggies and make fun of the new Lion King toys because that shit is nasty (i know Hypmic is set in the near future but have you considered: i do what i please)

-It’s sundown by the time you all finish eating so Ichiro insists they accompany you home

-When you all reach your place Ichiro fakes a phone call and leaves you kids to be anxious alone

-Saburo says he hopes you had a good time and that if you’re ever free on the weekend again maybe you could hang out? If you’d like to…. (Ichiro fist pumps from behind the corner)

-You tell him of course you would and his cheeks grow warm again and he stutters out an “O-Okay!” and that he’ll keep in touch and he smiles and you smile and its cute bro

-He leaves you with a “I’ll see you at school” and a small wave

-He tries to keep his face neutral when Ichiro asks him how it went (and that his Mantyke plush is cute) but he fails horribly, a slow smile creeping onto his features

♡

WOO finally finished these for a second time! i still had a lotta fun writing them though!! the rest of the divisions will be up shortly ;3c thanks for requesting!! 💖💗💕

[cuefunkymusic]

I am in a very sea slug related mood today, and I’m not sure why. Today is just a day for appreciating nudibranchs I suppose. Can I get a scenario for Pt.4 Jotaro and a close friend (s/o) looking around the coastline and finding some sea slugs and geeking out about them? Please. And thank you. :)

Hi this is very very late so my apologies! It kind of came out more as a short drabble than anything else tbh, plus I made it in two sittings with a time difference of a mONTh so i’m sorry if it’s not the best!!! I actually did research for this fic tbh hahgndsadas

part 4 ! jotaro x reader // slugs by the seaside

word count: 944

under cut for length!

A/N- i did actual research for this thing LMAO like half of it is just marine professor jotaro™ teaching you things 

A gentle breeze blew, and the briny smell of the sea hung in the air. You carefully made your way through  the cluster of rocks by the shore, the waves gently crashing against those farther away from you.

“Hey, watch your step.” You felt Jotaro take your hand, his grip comforting to you. You turned to look over at him, a smile on your face.

“I was doing just fine on my own, but thanks.” You said, a playful tone in your voice. He frowned.

“You can never be too careful. Besides, I don’t want you tripping and falling onto one of these rocks. Those goose barnacles can really leave a scratch,” he said, your hand still in his. You watched as he stepped a bit farther in front of you, carefully navigating his way through the rocks in front of him.

“Just follow my lead,” he said, taking a step forward as you followed him. The two of you carefully stepped through the maze of rocks, more flat land not too far ahead of you.

Wind blew through the area every so often, and you could smell the sea salt on the breeze alone, which was oddly refreshing. You took in the atmosphere as you followed Jotaro, neither of you saying a word. You two almost made it there before you saw Jotaro suddenly stop moving, silent.

“What’s wrong?” you asked, squeezing his hand. He was silent for a few seconds, and did not return a squeeze of your hand. You were about to nudge his arm, but he instead let go of your hand as he crouched down on the rocks, his gaze fixated on something. Confused, you followed his lead, squatting to his level.

“Look over there,” He murmured, pointing at a very bright yellow creature that you recognized as a sea slug of sorts, submerged under a more shallow part of the water. In fact, there were multiple of them, all attached to the same rock.

You yourself weren’t even close to Jotaro’s level of expertise in the field of Marine Biology, but you still found all of the animals that he studied very interesting.

“Those are nudibranchs, aren’t they?” you guessed, remembering they were a species he had told you about.

“Yeah, they are,” he said, his arms crossed, glancing down at the tide pool. “Those are sea lemons.”You laughed. “Sea lemons? I’ve heard of those before, but I never thought the name would belong to a species of nudibranch.” You saw a smirk creep onto his face, his gaze still fixated onto the tide pool.

“I knew there would be some sort of ocean life on the coastlines of Morioh, but I didn’t think they’d be in such large numbers,” he said, running his hand through the water. You dipped your hand in as well, the cold water refreshing.

“Aren’t nudibranchs a type of sea slug?” You asked.“Well, while they are technically sea slugs, sometimes people get nudibranchs and sea slugs mixed up,” he paused, adjusting his cap with his dry hand.

“Just… good grief. They’re not the same animal.” he said, the last few words he spoke more of a mumble.

“What makes them different than most sea slugs, then?” You watched as he took a deep breath, and you knew that you were in for a talk with him.

“Well, for one, they’re in compleltey different taxonomic groups which aren’t closely related to sea slugs. They don’t have a mantle cavity, and their gills are almost always exposed.”He ran his hand through the water again, sending ripples through the pool. “It’s not visible with this species, but some species have objects that resemble tentacles sticking out from their bodies, which can differentiate them from sea slugs.”

You watched as he rolled up his jacket sleeve, sticking his hand into the water and grabbing one of the nudibranchs. As he pulled it out of the water, he cupped his hands so it sat in his palms, and stood up straight as you also stood up.“See this?” He turned the creature so its backside was facing you, and you could see something coming out from the back that looked like a series of frills. “Those are their gills. All nudibranchs are considered sea slugs, but not all sea slugs are considered nudibranchs. These gills are one way to tell if it’s a nudibranch or not.”

“Oh, that’s neat. I wouldn’t have known those were gills. They look so… fancy.”

“Well, that’s one way to say it, I guess.” He looked down at the slug, seemingly talking to it. “Time to put you back into the ocean, huh…”He crouched back down, and in a surprisingly gentle manner, dipped his hands back into the water and eased the slug back in. You both sat together in silence for a bit, the only other sounds being the waves and seagulls around you. You felt yourself holding your breath as you watched the slug make its way back to the rock it was resting on before.

“You’re so gentle with them,” you said, more of an observation than anything else. “What made you point that out?” he asked, frowning.

“Well… I don’t know. It’s just, there’s kind of a different side to you when it comes to marine animals.”

You felt a warm, tingly feeling in your chest as you watched a small smile tug at the corners of his mouth, watching him stand back up. “That’s not a bad thing, is it?”

As he took a cloth out of his pocket to wipe his hands off, you grinned, reaching for his hand again.

“Not at all.”