#i love writing about this stuff please send more asks y'all

[scleracentipede]

I'd love more info about the individual system members! I also think a full list of ND headcanons for your Jon and Eddie would be cool too! Again, no pressure and thanks so much!!

tysm for clarifying! imma post some art about the different Scarecrow system members today so I’ll list some ND headcanons for ya now ☺️

Putting under a read more cos this got long!

Scarecrow

Scarecrow, as you know, I headcanon as having DID and by extension CPTSD because lets be real their childhood was horrid

He struggles alot with dissocaitive amensia and would probably say that is the part of his mental health he finds the most 'disabling'

He's spent a lot of his life dissociating from any strong emotion be that positive or negative and can barely remember happy moments let alone sad one (e.g., he can't remember getting his doctorate etc.) followed closely by their frequent flashbacks which manifest as bodily feeling flashbacks rather then actual memories.

Thier autistic and very unashamed of it.

Suprisingly were diagnosed in childhood despite the general neglect they faced but this was not a positive thing for them (see their Granny tried to 'fix it')

He never really therefore had like an autism discovery like some later diagnosed people and his response to being autistic was just kind of "Okay then."

He is not very 'good' with social stuff and gets overstimmed extremely easily leading to alot of angry outbursts that others precieve as 'temper tantrums' but he's geniunely in agony from the sensory inputs around him and the response is actually porpotional to what he's experiencing. (Wild right? Autistic people's 'irrational' responses might actually be rational to their experiences /sarcasm)

They are all stimming all the time because otherwise they'll scream but the way they stim varies between the alters in their system and isn't always the safest stim (what I mean by this is some of their stims cause them bodily harm but I don't like calling those 'bad' because that's very shaming)

Alot of people around them assume they don't experience empathy and there's definitely times where they have low empathy but they also experience very intense empathy to people their close to, to animals, and objects they just can't communicate this externally

Thier empathy for objects is very strong and why they fix so many items they find (that art piece 'Can't Help Myself' by Sun Yuang and Peng Yu left them catatonic with an intense grief and empathy for like a week)

He gets very focused on things and overall struggles to take care of himself any meaningful way without support. Like he will forget to eat or clean himself till he gets very stick from it without prompting and support

He likely needs a carer to help but doesn't have one and has to rely on his few friends when their free to keep him alive which does not help with his feelings of guilt and he'll often push people away so their not 'burdened' by him and so they don't feel bad for leaving him to rot.

In reality, his friends do not find it a burden at all and actually enjoy his company when he lets them.

He helps them all much more then he realises but he's stubborn like an ox and won't here it (e.g., helping him gives Jervis a schedule and routine that helps him remember more grounded and Jons company makes him very happy)

He has alot of support needs that often go unmet but he is loved and not a failure for that

Not ND but disability related is they definitely have physical health issues too

Specifically Ehlers-Dahlos Syndrome (like me!) and Marfan Syndrome

They have alot of joint pain, dizziness, nausea, and fatigue that contributes them get overstimmed quicker

They self medicate for this alot becuase they cannot afford how expensive healthcare is in Gotham so are usually a little stoned but that does help get less overstimmed so win-win

He's great to have as a friend to because he always baby apsrin (incase his heart plays up), nausea meds, and weed on him.

Edward

Edward has been misdiagnosed and rediagnosed so many times at this point hes skeptical about what actually applies to him so tends to just say hes neurodivergent if asked

As a child he was just labelled as 'petulant know it all' and got told he 'could be great if he'd just apply himself' in school

He's been diagnosed with the following over the years: basically every cluster b personality disorder depending on the doctor, autism, ADHD, autism and adhd, dyspraxia, brief psychotic disorder, OCD etc.

He personally finds AuDHD and OCD to be the most accurate and isn't sure what name you can give to his mood swings but he is relucantly willing to acknowledge that his emotional response seems inappropriate to situations

His complusions can be very dangerous and have lead to him being quite injured though with age he's got better at redirecting himself to do less harm to himself or reducing how much he needs to do something

He's found additional coping strategies like wearing gloves all the time to reduce his contamination fears that have been super helpful too

He's very fidgety and struggles to sit still and is often heard mumbling and talking to himself as a form of stimming (which one of Scarecrow's system finds very soothing actually like a particularly clever hyperlexic white noise machine)

His coordination isn't the best which frustrates him when he's trying to build his puzzles and leads to him relucantly, so very relucantly, asking for assistance from Echo and Query or in what he sees as the worse case scenario Jervis Tetch if its something more technical

He has hypergraphia and is always drawing and writing on things often feeling like his brain is too full and he needs to get it out

He struggles with some auditory halluncinations and occasional visual ones if he's spiralling (not going to share what because it can be triggering to people with hallucinations to read about)

He struggles alot with body image issues constantly trying to look 'perfect' so he seems more in controll then he feels as he's is terrfied of people realising how much of a fraud his confident exterior is

His weight flucuatates alot with the different medication he takes for his mental health and with his hrt which causes him some distress

Basically any change he cannot control upsets him

More physical disability headcanons: He actually needs his cane as he struggles with fibromyalgia and POTS so needs it to help relieve leg pain and for balance

He does water aerobics as a gentle excercise that helps with his pain (he thinks Scarecrow would benefit from it but he refuses to go with him - it would be so nice on his joints!)

Edward actually experiences alot more low empathy then Scarecrow and had to teach himself sympathy because he did not understand others at all when they were upset or happy

He's quite touch avoidant and isn't sure why (probably trauma Edward) because he often feels like he is so desparate to be hugged that he has been hollowed out with a melon bawler

In addition he often feels very nervous around other men especailly when they get aloud or drunk (once again trauma) so often ends up with closer friendships with the women in his life like Echo Query or the Gotham Sirens who often joke that he is their diversity man hire.

I hope you enjoyed my ramblings!

[boxwinebaddie]

Miss Ninaa!! When are you free for the summer???

hello, sweetling! and good morning, good afternoon or good night wherever it is that you are. <3 regardless of the time of day, please just know that the world around you is brighter bc you're in it. c':

so i just want to start out by saying that i know i say this a lot...but i cannot tell you what it means to me that you guys care enough about me to be curious about the trajectory of my offline life.

...like, i really just have the sweetest anons in the world, huh? ;-;

i feel unbelievably blessed and count my lucky stars everyday because of each and everyone of you. thank you for being your lovely, lovely selves and caring not only about me as a person but my silly and strange au styles from hell.

speaking of, i am aware that it does not seem like it because of how sporadically i post ncu related content ( if at all ) but i am trying to work on some stuff...as you know well by now, i like to really take my time putting out my work because the quality of the content that you read is paramount to me. you are all far too near and dear to my heart to receive lame, rushed, unclear boof ass content from me.

like...i simply will not do it. thank you for your paitence.

( i will say that i am specifically working on an ask about the greenhouse kiss which AAAAAA giggling, twirling my hair and kicking my feet, like it is SOOOOO satisfying, holy shit! it's also very, very important to the plot which is why i have been taking my time on it. i do hope to put it out today but i am trying not to make promises that i can't keep, get your hopes and dreams up just to dash them and most unfortunately, i do not have a great track record in that regard. i know it's kind of a bummer...but i like to be honest w/ y'all. )

ANYWAYS!

without further ado, here's a little glimpse into my life. xx

again, thank you for asking...that is very cute of you. c': <333

( this is lengthy and lowkey irrelevant. you can absolutely skip this but i think that i am pretty informative in here, so it might be useful? idk. )

so actually, my summer is pretty busy and jam-packed for the most part! or, the first two months are, at least. because i decided to take on summer camp here at the school i work on! camp counsellor nina!

i decided to nab a summer camp supervising position for a couple of reasons. like, obviously, teaching does not pay that much, so really, i need to make all the money i can while i can. don't worry about me tho, guys. bc actually am doing extremely well for myself. <333

( i am a very lucky person, haha -- god nerfed me by being mentally ill, but did make me pretty and personable...which gets me far in life. on the topic of mental illness [ of which i am very ] today i should fare quite well bc other than having a mild headache and being lowkey naseous because my mood stabilizer has that side effect for me...it is worth it when i rem(ember) to take it because it makes me very calm and level, so i am better at responding to my asks/doing my tasks. )

another reason is it keeps me busy...when i am not constantly busy, i get very depressed and fall into gnarly sprials. my job has a lot of downtime and when i am not running around like crazy because a bunch of teachers are out, i'm bored as fuck and i get lazy or restless.

very lame...this summer, i will be looking for a different job ( fml, if you are my boss, don't read this ) and i am a bad procrastinator so i missed the deadline for a fuck ton of teaching positions, but hopefully i can find something in the realm of associate or assistant teaching because....lmao, point and laugh but i am still a little too nervous to teach a whole class by myself. if kids get disadvantaged academically because i am too incompetent at teaching, i will die.

but yeah...if i am still babysitting fourteen year olds after this ( they did grow on me, but it's really not my speed ) please also point and laugh because i would rather go back to retail...yes, i am desperate.

on the subject of teaching kids that are in my wheelhouse and doing stuff my speed, summer camp is actually all k-5 so i will FINALLY being doing a majority of my teaching in the age group that i have my literal credential in. YAY! it's going to be hot as shit where i am over the summer, probably also tiring as shit ( have you seen how little kids act in the summer? ) but i am so fkn exCITED to work with the littles HEEEEELLL YES, BROTHER! uncle nina will be Vibing! <333

so for the first four weeks i am doing general camp stuff, getting a feel for stuff and wokring with all the grade levels...but the LAST two weeks, i get to specifically associate teach in the kindergarten classroom and AAAAAAAA!!!!! I FKN LOVE THE KINDERS!!!!! i visit them every other day because, again, i am bored as shit and they need help over there so i usually hang out with them in PE and play hula hoop tag with them...rn they are learning how to jump rope. soooo stinking cute, oh my god.

-- BUT YES I AM SOOOOO FREAKING STOKED YOU GUYS LIKE I WAS MADE FOR THIS BROTHER. i am gonna wear so many crazy outfits and do such weird makeup pray it doesn't melt off my face.

also, during camp, they go on little field trips and things, hopefully swimming, ( uncle nina is mermaid nina ) and feed you the same stuff as the campers so i get to eat like a nasty frat boy and have pizza and pasta and stuff, which, let me tell you, i am genuinely stoked because they cater a free lunch for the faculty here everyday and it's supposed to be all fancy and shit...but there is a reason it's free because it is SOOOO mid. like it really is kind of ass. i don't know how they do that.

but, sigh, camp is only six weeks so i have to fill my time with other stuff ( also i guess that means in six weeks from when school is done on june...14th, i think? i am free? ) i hope to use that time to structure the fuck out of my life, planf or the future because i am hella bad at it and i hope to do a lot of writing! kind of a pipe dream at this point becaue all my stuff has been *british tolkien vc* actual shite and i can't finish anything...but maybe when i feel better, writing will come easier? when i am less busy and stressed? i hope so. and i hope you guys are still around if i am here but i Completely understand if you are not! it's been a long, bumpy ride. you did your dues and you are free to step off at any time. again, i do not blame you. i am annoying.

BUT YEAH! that's my summer for you! summer camp, hanging out with my cat ( her name is lily, she is very beautiful, very kind, very fluffy and dumb as rocks but she is my babygirl ), getting lots of sushi, going to the thrift store, doing self care stuff, doing less self harm in various odd forms specifically in the form of self sabotage, getting my life together and organized, finding a new job, bettering myself and the world, being kind, entertaining all of you and hopefully writing again! yay! i'll update you as much as i can.

and please, please, pleeeease update me on your lives! i know i don't always respond, but i read everything. my friend who won FIRST PLACE for her raven sculpture, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU BABY. my friends who unfortunately went through breakups, i am so sorry, please know it is their loss, you are stronger for it and i hope you heal, but if ravesey can...you can baby. also proud of my various friends going to college and my friends that are not! my friends toiling through their lame jobs and my friends who are dipping their toes in the world of creativity through writing, drawing expressing yourself! i love, love, LOVE you! thank you for sharing your lives with me.

( speaking of friends, i am specifically hoping to spend my summer bonding with my rant girlies and we made a little group chat and we are being so funny and chaotic and unhinged. i love them all so bad. )

BUT YEAH! thank you for asking my love! look out for some important in character asks, hopefully some finished or more distinguished writing and know that if i am not responding or posting, it is not because i lost interest...as you can see, i am very busy, especially as the school year approaches an end, my summer is a little busy, i fall into ugly manic/depressive cycles and am working on taking care of myself...offline. thank you for understanding.

and thank you for being here! you are troopers, forreal! you are angels and saints for putting up for me and enduring me never posting or posting really chaotic weird stuff. i love you. thanks for caring. <3

i love you and i hope you heal,

uncle nina, future ceo of glamour girl summer camp <3

P.S. i am specifically working on developing and post more about my other aus because i want to give you some variety and challenge myself to do stuff out of my comfort zone! so if you are excited at all about the tsot/tfbw nina stuff, please make some NOOOOISE! lol and if you are not i totally get it, but if you could give me gentility and grace, i would appreciate it because i'm insecure abt it. MWAH!

[soaps-mohawk]

I'm going to be honest

I'm having a genuinely hard time making this post. I've been fighting with it for a couple weeks now, but I think it's time I finally make it.

I'm not having fun on this blog anymore.

It sounds bad, but honestly, it kind of is.

I think a lot of it started from the very beginning with the precedence and expectations I put on myself. I've always tried to respond to every comment I get. Even from the beginning. It's just a polite thing to do since those who leave comments took the time to write out what they think of my fic, even if it's just a keysmash. I've always felt the need to thank those who leave comments or reblog my writing or (now that tumblr has it) replied to my fics. It worked fine before because none of my fics were particularly popular. Even my most popular fic (at that time) didn't get as much attention as CRCB has. I've never had a "big blog" before, nor a fic as popular as CRCB has gotten.

It was fine at first, responding to everyone, engaging with everyone. I was riding that high of omg so many people are reading and enjoying my fic! I've never had anything quite like this before.

Now...it just feels more like a chore. I set this precedence on this blog that I respond to everyone and I know a lot of people have said that they're surprised I responded to them and to everyone, and now I'm getting why a lot of writers don't. I'm exhausted. I feel like I've just been robotically saying the same thing over and over trying to respond to people now. I used to love seeing asks in my inbox and reblogs and replies but now? All I feel is dread because I have to respond to all of those.

Turning anon off was a big help. It lessened the sheer volume of asks I was getting a day. And while I do feel bad for all of my anons who prefer to stay anons, with everything that happened (the multiple incidents) with anon that kind of started to suck the joy out of everything. That paired with the obsessive need to constantly have my inbox cleared and make sure everyone gets a response...I can understand now too why big blogs will have 200+ asks in their inbox. It's hard and it's exhausting and I'm burning out.

First it was the fic that was burning me out. Things have gone on far longer than I planned and I just wasn't prepared for this fic to go on and for a while there it was dragging. I'll admit that. If I could go back, I'd speed up a few things, but it's done, it's posted there's no going back. I kind of hoped I would have the mental capacity to upload more than once a week too, but I just couldn't. I still can't.

I've come to dread posting chapters because I know I'm going to have to reply and respond to everyone. The only thing keeping me posting is the fact that we're in the part of the story I've been excited about since the beginning and also because I keep leaving everyone on cliffhangers and I love torturing y'all with all of them.

So that being said, this is in no way to shame anyone for interacting with me, anyone leaving comments or replies or sending asks. Don't feel bad about doing it please. I appreciate all of you that have engaged with me and it really means so much to me. Honestly, earlier this year, if I didn't have this fic and everyone on this blog, I might not have made it to now. It's been a really rough year and it's still going to be into next year. It's just getting to the point where I need a break.

I've needed a break for a long time. I thought taking days off the blog would help, and it did for a couple of weeks, but now even on the days I'm supposed to be on the blog and engaging, I just find myself queueing stuff up and just being offline most of the day still.

I'm tired. That's the best reason I can give. I'm tired and burned out on life and I'm tired and burned out on this blog.

So...I think I need a break. I need to not keep responding to every single reply and reblog every chapter. I need to not force myself to answer every ask right away, no matter how much I want to. I feel bad, but I know everyone would rather have me here and enjoying the blog than forcing myself to interact to the point where I'm dreading it and just robotically repeating myself over and over with every reply and answer and comment.

I won't be pausing the fic, I won't be not uploading. I'll still be posting chapters, I just might not be interacting as much as I have been. It's just putting such a mental strain on me still, even with anon off, even with days off. And with things getting busier for me, it's going to be too much to try and deal with irl stuff and write and try to be super active on the blog. There's going to come a point where I have to sacrifice the writing or the blog and I'd rather sacrifice the blog to keep myself sane, and also to keep trying to finally get this fic done. I love this fic, don't get me wrong, but I'm just burning out.

I'm already burned out in a lot of ways.

I was planning kinktober this year but honestly I'm considering not doing it because I know interaction is going to be insane and it's going to be a lot to keep up on. Plus trying to write that many fics is hard and I'm not sure I have the ability to do it. I have a few done but now I'm just like...is that something I want to do on top of irl stuff and CRCB.

There's just no joy in it anymore. It's not anyone's fault but mine. I put the pressure on myself, I held myself to that standard for this long despite the fact I knew it was draining me. I've tried to push through when I should have prioritized myself. I feel so guilty not responding to everyone. I feel so guilty being a day or two late responding to everyone.

I want to be here and interacting and responding to things but I just can't bring myself to anymore. It's no one's fault, and this is not a drag on anyone, or an attempt to make anyone feel bad or guilty for interacting or sending asks or anything. I'm just airing out the truth and saying what I need to say because I feel like I've been so robotic and lifeless with my responses these last couple weeks and I feel like I need to explain why. It's nothing anyone has done. It's my fault. It's 100% my fault.

Things have just gotten to be too much and it's my fault for forcing myself to be so active. The social battery has dropped into the negatives. I'm not a social person. I can only handle so much interaction and I've pushed so far beyond that, that things have gotten to this point. I want to be here and I want to have fun and I want to use this as an escape but I just don't feel that way about it anymore. It's a chore for me, a job, something I feel like I have to do and it's my fault that I feel that way. It's my own standards and expectations I set on myself, and my expectations on what I think my followers want and deserve and now I feel like I've gone on too long like this that I can't change things without hurting anyone's feelings. I don't want people to think I'm ignoring them in favor of others because I know there's writers out there that do that. They only respond to a certain group and ignore others that comment and reblog. I don't want to make anyone feel like I'm doing that to them and that's now led me to here.

I'm forcing it and I'm tired.

It's been hard these last few weeks. The life has just been draining and draining continuously. The joy and the love I have for this blog and my followers and the interactions and the fic. The last anon bullshit that happened was just kind of the last nail in the coffin so to speak. The straw that broke the camel's back. Things stopped being fun. It made me feel bad (and not in the guilty way, though that was a part of it) and I'm honestly just over it. I'm over the blog, I'm over interacting, I'm over life at this point. August is a hard month for me and every year it seems to get worse and worse. A lot of it is unrelated to anything online and I was going to make a post about it but honestly I just don't want to. Those that know, know. Those that don't...it doesn't matter.

I'm getting annoyed by the blog, I'm getting annoyed every time I look in my notifications and see an ask or a reply or a comment. I'm getting annoyed by some of my followers and that's not fair to you. Everyone always talks about how nice and kind and patient I am when I'm really not. I'm not the person I present myself to be on this blog, the way I mask myself so I can present myself as being a normal, kind human being. The mask is coming off because I'm so tired I can't keep it up anymore. It's happening here and it's happening in real life. I'm tired and I'm frustrated and I'm angry at a lot of things and the last thing I want is to start taking it out on my followers. You don't deserve that, especially when it's not your fault, it's nothing any of you have done. It's all me.

It's not you, it's me.

So for the sake of not burning this whole thing to the ground, I'm going to take a break. I'm not replying to everyone, I'm not responding to every reblog, I won't reply to every ask I get right away, if at all because sometimes I just don't have anything to say in response and I need to learn that's okay. It's nothing against you. It's not aimed at anyone specifically, I'm just trying to put myself first and stop things from escalating. I need a break and I'm going to do something selfish and I'm going to take it.

Don't apologize because it's not your fault. Don't apologize because you think you might have contributed to this because you didn't. It is no one's fault but my own.

I'm the one that needs to apologize to all of you because I've just not been myself because I've been forcing myself to be someone I'm not. I've been very unfair to a lot of people over the last seven months that this blog has been active and I've held a precedent that is not sustainable in the long run and made everyone believe that I was capable of maintaining that kind of interaction when I'm not.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry I've been putting everyone through this. I'm sorry I've been so detached and robotic and ingenuine. I'm sorry I led everyone to believe I'm someone I'm not. I'm sorry I've dragged this on this long that it's gotten to the point that I have to make this post.

I considered just disappearing but that wouldn't be fair to you either. I don't want to put you through that, so I'm pouring all of my thoughts out and making you read through this fucking novel of a post. If you've made it this far, then congrats I guess. Gold metals to you who bothered reading this far.

Anyway, all of that aside, I'll still be posting chapters. I'll have them scheduled and I'll probably come on and add links places to keep things current. I'll respond and reply and answer asks when I feel like it. You don't have to stop sending them, but just don't expect them to be responded to right away anymore. I'll probably still be here reblogging things I want and doing things when I feel like it.

I just need a few weeks to myself. Time I don't have to care about the blog at all and keeping up with it. Anon will remain off for the sake of keeping asshole trolls away, and also so I don't open tumblr and have 200 asks in my inbox after a week. Sorry to my anons but it's just the way it needs to be right now. Maybe once this break is over and I've dealt with irl stuff, I'll consider putting it back on. I just can't after everything I dealt with recently on anon.

It'll be the same on Ao3, for those that follow here and read there. Comments will probably sit for a while. They won't be answered right away anymore unless I get the energy to burn through them. Even then I won't try to answer them all at once like I did this last weekend.

I'll try to reblog something every day so y'all know I'm alright. I don't want y'all to panic and it's not fair to put you through that, especially those that might not see this or bother reading it. Those that follow simply for the fic and nothing else. I'm here, I'm just not...here.

This week's chapter is in the queue to be posted tomorrow as usual. Chapters will still come out as planned since I'm not stopping writing, just taking a break from the blog itself.

Thank you those of you who stuck through to the end here. I appreciate all of you so much. You have no idea. I'm sorry I let things get to this point and I'm sorry to anyone that I've gotten rude or snappy with because I couldn't be selfish and put myself first. I'm sorry to anyone that got a robotic, repeated response to something they were probably excited to share. I'm sorry I've been so unfair to everyone and I hope you can forgive me.

Take care and I'll talk to everyone when I have the energy to.

[leebrontide]

Hi everyone!

I'm asking for a (free) favor from y'all.

I'm trying to get more people to sign up for my free monthly author newsletter, and I'd love for you to help me find people who might enjoy it.

Every month, I write an essay about a subject. I'm not just collecting contacts to send ads to!

Sometimes it's about writing process

A Unique Character Development Technique 

The Golden Girls, D&D, and The Newest Way I’m Refusing to Make Writing Solitary 

The Bananabook Method

Lies I Tell Myself, Security Blankets and Backstitch Drafting

On Listening When You Want to Throw Things and Break Stuff

And other times it's a deep dive into a research topic for my books

Why I’m Researching a 19th Century Cult This Month

Spider Goat is Real but is Not Marvel Affiliated

People Just Really Want to Say "Enhance"

That Most Intimate of Thrones

Whose Side is Your House On?

The Care and Feeding of Dream Homes

What Arguing About Captain America Taught Me About Psychotherapy

Nuclear Waste and the Ray Cat Solution

Sometimes it's about mental health, especially through the lenses of fantasy and scifi

Of Flesh and Gundams

What Feeling Are You Most Afraid Of?

Sometimes it's even about legal systems and their interactions with the medical field and expanding medical technologies

Tractors, Cybernetics and the Radical at the Radioshack

Because Everybody Was Calling for YA Scifi About HIPAA, Right? 

Or queer stuff

What Do We Celebrate?

What Stories Are You Made Of?

Or disability

Another Kind of Coziness 

Tinkering With Cyberpunk

Things I Stole from Julian Bashir

What Does Time Feel Like?

Or it could be anything else that I'm willing to think deeper about that month. You can browse the full archive over here.

AND it almost always includes pictures of my very cute cats!

So could you please boost, if you feel your followers might be into that?

The subscription signup is right here.

Help an indie author out?

[pleasestayawayidonotlikeyou]

The headcanons you wrote for Berry and Rasp were so good! Would you be willing to do some romantic headcanons for the cool skellies? (Cross, fresh, and epic?) I'm so excited to see what other stuff you write and draw!

Oh my thank you traveler! I hope you enjoy the future content on my blog <3

Featuring:Fresh, Epic, Cross.

Masterlist

Fresh

Traveler did you really fall for a parasite?

Looks like you have a very cool datemate broski!

Fresh definitely has trouble showing affection at first, he's never been in a relationship before ya know?

However, he asks his best buddy Dream for advice! He also asked Ink and Error but they didn't have very useful advice

He's not a fancy guy, nah, he's taking you to the skate park or just a random park for a date and doing picnics until the moon appears.

Does not have a house of his own, he's a parasite, he doesn't work silly, so he lives with you on the omega timeline.

He tries to help around the house, he swears the microwave exploded on its own though!

I headcannon most Sanses as tall, and Fresh's probably the tallest (if we're not counting with Ted) , it's pretty common how much he picks you up just because he wants to.

Sometimes he says he's "going to work" and comes back hours later, turns out his "job" is annoying the living shit out of Error.

If you ever want to learn skate boarding he'll gladly teach you with a smile stuck on his face during the process.

Epic

Oh my, dating the King of memes are we traveler?

He's one of the best skeletons to date on the multiverse, lives in the omega timeline, is funny, treats you like you're the most important person who ever existed for him, now that I think about it you're kinda lucky traveler.

Talking about memes, he lags your phone with how much he sends you, Epic does not have pity on your poor phone.

He's the type of guy who the moment you ask for attention, he's cuddling you in the couch while a movie's playing on the TV.

Epic surprisingly knows more about the multiverse than how to cook. He managed to burn pasta. PASTA.

Grabs random cats from the street and adopts them, y'all have like 6 cats now, and one is named oi oi oi... Please stop your man traveler...

Makes you laugh on every opportunity he gets, especially when you're feeling down.

Takes you out to outertale pretty regularly, and every time he points at the brightest star he sees and says "Look at it darling! It's ya!"

Cross

Sometimes Killer teases you asking if you got yourself a boyfriend or a dog.

This is because Cross kinda acts like a guard dog, he's big and he can be scary when he wants to, plus, he works with Nightmare! What if someone tries to take you hostage? He can't let that happen can he?

I am aware that in canon Cross isn't part of the bad Sanses and all, but in this version he works with Nightmare destroying and terrorizing worlds to reconstruct his own.

You're definitely not living in the omega timeline, you're living on his unfinished AU instead!

He's used to waking up early, 6 am maximum, so when he sees your cute sleeping face laying next to him, he just can't let himself get up without filling your face with kisses.

Chara teases him for being such a softie around you.

Cross loves sleepy cuddles in the morning, especially when you're burying your head on his chest while murmuring for him to get back to sleep.

When he gets back from a long mission he usually brings you small gifts he thinks you'd like.

[o-sachi]

─── Sachi's Selfship Event ✦

Heya, here's my event for my 500 followers milestone. It's been fun writing my silly thoughts and sharing it on this blog. Thanks for all the support y'all have given me. But, as I've mentioned in my last post, I'll start writing on a different blog.

eermmm... update?

✦ The Event ───

Basically, you tell me about your selfship and I give you a set of headcanons based on the SFW alphabet (see content under the cut for the alphabet). For moots and followers that I recognize, I’ll do 10 letters. For everyone else, 8 letters. And for anons, 6 letters.

For fandoms, please keep it within Blue Lock, Wind Breaker, Mashle, and Kaiju no. 8!

✦ Instructions ───

Send me an ask containing the following: your chosen character, your chosen letters, your likes & dislikes, love languages (receiving and giving), hobbies, interests, basic description of your appearance, picrews, random facts, some of your own lore about your selfship, etc. —literally everything that can help me write a more accurate set of headcanons

* Since some people might not be comfortable sharing their info, I’ll keep the asks in my inbox and tag you on your post instead. But if you’re on anon, I have no choice but to answer the ask.

✦ Rules ───

1. Do not rush me with your request. If you’ve sent me an ask, I’ve definitely read it.

2. Only one selfship per person!

3. Do not include any nsfw information in the ask that you will send me.

Note: Depending on the amount of asks I get, I might not be able to fulfill all of them. Of course, moots and followers take priority!

Fulfilled Letters !

✉️: Letter for Lumi ✉️: Letter for Candy ✉️: Letter for Amy ✉️: Letter for Rye

✉️: Letter for Maru ✉️: Letter for Chiya ✉️: Letter for Miro✉️: Letter for Jei

✉️: Letter for Mari ✉️: Letter for Luvlyycy

Check under the cut for the letters you can choose from ~

These are just general descriptions for each letter, but based on the info you'll give me, I can delve into it deeper and provide stuff beyond what is written here.

A - Affection How do they show their affection for you? Do they get bouts of cuteness aggression?

B - Best Quality What they think is/are your best quality/ies and why

C - Comfort How do they comfort you when you're sad and down?

D - Dates What kind of dates do you two like to go on? How frequent?

E - Early Relationship How did you two get together? What was it like when you were just first starting out?

F - Fights What do you usually fight over? Do you quarrel often? How do things get resolved? Who says sorry first?

G - Gifts Their favorite gift that they got from you or a gift they've given to you. Do they like receiving gifts? If so, what kinds?

H - Hugs Are they a hugger? What kinds of hugs do they prefer? What about cuddling?

I - Intimacy What makes you feel connected at a deeper level? What kind of romance do you have?

J - Jealousy How jealous are they? How do they deal with it?

K - Kisses How do they kiss you? Do they like kissing?

L - Laughter What are your inside jokes? What do you usually laugh about together? Who's funnier?

M - Memories What is your most cherished memory together?

N - Nicknames Do they like nicknames? If so, what do they like to be called or what do they call you?

O - Other People What do other people think about your relationship? (Family, friends, co-workers, etc.)

P - Patience How patient are they? Who's the more patient one between the two of you? What happens if they lose their patience?

Q - Quirks What are some quirks you adopted from each other? Or what are the quirks that only come out when you're together?

R - Rituals What are some things in your routines that you like to do together? Is it common or unusual? How frequent is it? Is it a daily, weekly, or annual thing?

S - Support How do they show their support for your hobbies and interests? How involved are they?

T - Time Apart How do you spend your time apart? Who caves first? Who handles it better?

U - Uniqueness What sets you apart from other couples?

V - Values What are your shared values?

W - Wildcard Random headcanon about your relationship

X - XOXO What are the little things that they do for you? Do you notice them or maybe they go unnoticed?

Y - Yin & Yang How do you complement each other? How do you make them a better person? Or how do you make them happier? Are you two opposites or are you more similar to each other?

Z - Zrandom (sorry ran out of ideas, forgive me) Pick a theme or any topic and I'll make a headcanon for it :)

Again, for moots and followers that I recognize, I’ll do 10 letters. For everyone else, 8 letters. And for anons, 6 letters.

[allaboutnayeli]

stupid lil headcanons about mapi

author notes: i'm pushing out more of these dumb posts than fics but i swear fics are coming 🙏🏾 just let my mind work it's magic y'all. anyways stupid headcanons about mapi that hold no value, enjoy!

➜ mapi probably asks ingrid to talk to the waitress when she receives the wrong order. it's not really that she's scared to say something, it's just mapi doesn't want to say anything herself

➜ she probably sends ingrid stupid memes in spanish about the most irrelevant things that ingrid is always like "wtf? where did you get these from?" (she got them from twitter)

➜ doesn't care for tiktok that much but sometimes someone sends her an edit off of that app and she giggles

➜ this woman be low-key confused when the barca coach talks about the team's game plan. afterwards she always asks alexia to explain to her in simple terms

➜ we all know she had that emo phase. during that phase she still listened to a lot of spanish music (she couldn't get with the actual emo music) and used tumblr like it was god sent

➜ mapi be giggling and kicking her legs while stalking ingrid's instagram during international break. she has like a thousand photos of ingrid in her gallery, but the instagram posts just hit different

➜ double texts everything. never writes in paragraphs and she probably have many typos in her texts because she be typing at the speed of light

➜ mapi's favorite type of kisses are cheek kisses because she finds them really cute

➜ if the word clingy had a picture in the dictionary, mapi would be the photo. this woman is attached to ingrid so bad and just likes hanging off of her. half of the time she just annoys ingrid but refuses to move away when her when ingrid tells her off

➜ clumsy at the worse moments. could be holding a plate full of food and mapi is going to slip on thin air

➜ likes piggy back rides especially from ingrid

➜ mapi is the biggest cryer when it comes to movies. it could be the happiest movie ever but let one sad thing happen and she's bawling

➜ begs ingrid to do her hair in silly lil hairstyles and always talks cute selfies after

➜ a cuddle bug. not just with ingrid but also her cat

➜ mapi shall not be trusted with knives or any sharp objects, she always end up cutting herself. ingrid has to comfort her afterwards

➜ is so annoying to play against in a fifa game. she will do anything in her power to make you lose (pushing, saying the most out of pocket stuff, screaming at the top of her lungs, anything to her opponent to lose the game)

➜ dyes her hair when stressed (but don't tell anybody that)

➜ either a fun drunk or a sad drunk. depends on the day and if ingrid is around

➜ she randomly flexes in front of ingrid to try to impress her (ingrid doesn't give a fuck but gives many compliments)

➜ speaking of impressing ingrid, this woman will stop a car with her bare hands just to have ingrid give her a compliment. what can be said? #girlfriendvalidationisthebest

➜ 100% is a pouter, a whiner, a "but babeee:("

➜ the type to get a tattoo for her girlfriend and not even tell anyone until someone just notices

➜ mapi is surprisedly flexible, don't ask how she figured that out

➜ follows ingrid around like a lost puppy. she just loves her girl so bad

➜ her favorite season is summer and her favorite thing to do during summer is to go to the beach. for one, she loves to be in the water and for two, she gets to see ingrid in a bikini. a win is a win

➜ says the most random shit that pops up in her mind like "do you think dinosaurs are related to chickens? and if they are related to chickens then when someone eats chicken, are they eating dinosaur meat?" and ingrid would just be like "please just eat your food"

➜ not the best dancer in the world but no body can tell her that

➜ mapi sometimes just gets baby fever and pesters ingrid before forgetting about it then she sees a baby & the process happens all over again

➜ overall mapi is just so silly 😝

© thinkingaboutjaedyn

[sxcret-garden]

Haiii - I hope you’re doing well and also that your hard hours mtl for ATEEZ are still open 🫣. If not plz disregard!!!! But if yes: mtl likely to send you videos of them getting off / want to receive videos of you getting off 🫠🫠🫠 your blog is 🥹 perfection 🥹 and I hope you write the most self indulgent fics because wow - all hits and no misses that I’ve found so far!!!! Danke 💗💗

Aaahhhh thank you so much for saying that anon 😭😭😭💕 it means a lot 🫶 auch danke hehe

As for your question.... first of all that's hot 🫣 second...

most

Seonghwa

Mingi

Wooyoung

Hongjoong

San

Jongho

Yunho

Yeosang

least

I think Seonghwa and Mingi would both be down for exchanging videos of y'all getting off. Frequently. Like, Seonghwa is just gonna be such a tease about it, seeing his videos you can't help but feel like he thought way too much about this before shooting it. Loveslovesloves sending you videos where he lets his hand brush down his clothed body, eventually palming himself through his pants and letting you hear the most delicious moans. And if you text him back, begging for more, he follows it up with another video of him naked, jerking off while muttering your name. If you send him a video of yourself he'll make sure to praise you A LOT, telling you how beautiful you are with every message you get as a reply. For Mingi I think it'd be a lot more sexual and less sensual. Like... strikes me as the type to send you videos of him jerking off when you're apart for a while and you both miss each other, telling you in detail what he wants to do to you the next time you see each other. Definitely has a folder on his phone of videos that you've sent him, and it certainly gets used quite frequently

Wooyoung and Hongjoong would also like the idea of exchanging videos of you two masturbating, but I think they wouldn't do it as frequently. Wooyoung especially finds the thought of filming himself getting off on you and then showing you hot af - whether he's just casually jerking off or if he's thinking and talking about a detailed fantasy of what he wants to do with you during. Appreciates it if you also enjoy sending him such videos, but he's also fine with it if you don't like doing that (though the day will come where he lets you know just how curious he is what it would feel like to receive a video like that from you lol). Hongjoong probably won't send as many videos himself, but he's down for receiving them from his partner. Finds it so hot, and when he has the time he'll definitely respond to your videos with a video of him jerking off, while praises for you continuously fall from his lips. He too likely has a folder of videos and audios of you moaning and getting off on his phone.

I think both San and Jongho would find it hot from time to time, but it's not something they absolutely want to see become a regular thing between you two. As for San I think he might enjoy making videos for you even more than receiving them from you. Definitely a sucker for you telling him what to do and then him acting it out in front of the camera, asking whether he's being a good boy or not, maybe even edging himself for you. And then sometimes you're gonna get a video of him just jerking off and lowkey growling into the mic that he needs you (the duality of this guy istg-). Will tell you how sexy and beautiful you are if you send him videos back, but as I said, it's more fun to him if he's the one sending them to you. Jongho would be the opposite I think. He'd love receiving such videos from you from time to time, and if it's something you really enjoy doing he'll certainly tell you about stuff he wants to see you do. As for him sending you those kinds of videos... I actually think he might be too shy to do it?? Will definitely let you convince him to try it if you really want him to. However he'll do it mostly to please you, and might feel a little awkward about it.

As for Yunho and Yeosang, I don't think it's something they're super into. Yunho will be open to try it, and even get some enjoyment from it if his partner likes it. Will both be fine with filming himself getting off and receiving videos by you, and in the case of the latter he'll make sure to tell you how gorgeous he thinks you are. But at the end of the day he prefers sexual acts when you're both in the same room! Yeosang is similar, except I'm not sure if he'd be down to try filming himself. He would certainly appreciate getting a video by you, but even that's not something he'd actively ask for. He too prefers doing stuff with you when he can actually touch you and see you irl

[wc-m0ch4]

Shadow the Hedgehog x gn! Reader NSFW Headcanons

I forgot that you have to reply to an ask directly so he's the image of said ask lol

(Separate note but I kinda wanna do some of the rottmnt or 2012 tmnt bros so I might be doing some stuff on them next lol anyways–)

Shadow is on the dominant side I feel like this is obvious LMAO

Like he might occasionally sub but it'd be like a power bottom sort of thing

He'd definitely be into forcing his partner into submission

BRAT TAMER

sorry

Anyways

A close runner-up is having a S/O that willingly submits to him from the get-go

Send nudes/ revealing pics to this man PLEASE–

Imagine you're texting Shadow asking him when he'll get home and he's all 'it's going to be hours before I get home, be patient' yada yada then you send a pic in some lingerie and he just:

"Be ready."

Then like 10 minutes later you're getting railed LMAO

He's got a folder of every dirty picture you've sent him and he'll tease you about them

You walk in on him sorting through them and he laughs when you get embarrassed

"You're the one who sent the pictures. Did you think I would waste such works of art?" And he's got a pic of your ass on screen LMAO

I think he'd be into photography during sex

Not sex tapes but like he's got a Polaroid camera specifically for when you two go at it

Also I think he'd like punishment

Okay imagine Shadow makes a bunch of rules for you to follow in the bedroom that day but he purposefully makes it so you can't AHAKDNABKAND

"Aw, couldn't do it, love? I guess I'll have to fix that."

And there rules to follow during the punishment and if you don't follow them.... sheeeshhhhh

Like let's say he spanks you, you have to count each one, thank him properly each time, you're not allowed to squirm or whine, like you are so FUCKED (LITERALLY)

I don't think he's really into bondage exactly but let's talk about him tying your hands and then telling you if you want to cum you have to figure it out yourself OMFGGGGG

You try to hump the heel of your foot and he mocks you the whole time

Adding on to that, he's into orgasm denial/control

If ya want your orgasm, ya gotta work for it, thems tha rules

He'll use toys and give you tasks to do

He'll have you sucking his dick while he controls the remote vibrator inside you

If you want him to turn up the speed, you better get to gobblin that cob yfm?

I think Shadow would prefer missionary so he can see your face, so you can wrap your legs around him, so he can grab at your hips and nipples, etc.

Okay so outside of the bedroom–

Shadow manspreads and it's just MMMMM

He'd do things in public that turn you on without even thinking of it lmao

Like he'd grab your hips when he's trying to move past you

Or whisper in a low voice in your ear

Or say things without realizing the double meaning (a perfect opening for 'that's what she said' jokes)

Okay continuing on,

I think he'd have some sort of claiming thing going on

Cum inside you/on you, mark you (bites, bruises), writing on you, etc.

I mean like you're your own person, of course.... but your his

Okay I know I've been going on about his kinks but overall I think he'd be pretty vanilla is just occasionally he'll get more risqué

That's when all the kinky shit pops out

Not entirely related but Rogue would probably ask you some time into the relationship if y'all have done the deed LMAO

And if you say 'yes' she's asking for details lol

Anyways that's all I got for today, thank you my dear anon <3

Happy Holidays to everyone! I wanted to do a holiday themed thing but that might be coming later (like months later lmao)

Requests are open currently and I'll see y'all soon ;)

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

Pairing : Hwang Hyunjin x F!Reader TW : none ; it's just cringe fluff ; Hyunjin and reader are that couple ; Word Count : 1.0k Request : nope! A/N : it was my birthday yesterday and I had to work and y'all, I'm so exhausted. I'm writing this from the future, but I just know I'ma be soooo fucking sleepy!!! I hope everyone is enjoying these and please, know that I am getting to the requests, I just really want to do some cute stuff before I jump back into angst. My life has been angsty enough.

“Send me a picture of your face.” The text came in as Hyunjin walked through the main doors of the airport. Of course, it was from you, so he immediately responded, unable to hide his smile even under the mask that he was wearing. 

“Whyyy? You miss me? Hmmm? You miss me so much??? Wanna hug me? Wanna kiss me? Hmmmm????” He teasingly texted back before slipping his phone in his pocket, giggling to himself and earning disgusted looks from the two youngest guys in the group. “What? Don’t look at me like that. Don’t be jealous that I’m in looove.” 

“Gross. How long have you been dating? Isn’t the honeymoon phase supposed to wear off already?” Seungmin retorted, his nose scrunched up just to emphasize just how disgusted he was. Jeongin nodded in agreement, although they both didn’t hesitate to fall back just so they could keep up with Hyunjin, although it was mostly so they could continue teasing him. 

“The honeymoon phase doesn’t wear off if you’re really in looove.” Hyunjin responded, trying his best not to laugh along with the two youngest. He himself thought it was cringe, as did you, but for some reason, although he didn’t mind it one bit, you both agreed on acting the part of that couple just to see the reactions from the guys. It had been an agreement made at the beginning of your relationship, and now two years in and already engaged, the act had become the real thing and neither of you could shake it. 

“I bet you paint her a bunch of pictures and put cheesy little poems along with them. Don’t you?” Jeongin baited, knowing damn well that he did, but the three of them had made it a habit, almost like yours and Hyunjins habit of being the cringiest couple in the universe, to tease each other about these things. “Bet you guys have matching bunny slippers that you wear around the house.” 

“Hey! Don’t talk about the bunny slippers, you don’t know about the bunny slippers. They’re comfortable and they grip the floor really well.” Hyunjin said, although with that he couldn’t help but let out the laughter that he was holding in. 

“Oh yeah, I bet the bunny slip grips work wonders when you’re chasing each other around having your late night pillow fights.” Seungmin chimed in once more, and now all three of them were laughing loudly, catching the attention of the other members who were walking ahead. 

Truthfully, Hyunjin didn’t mind the teasing all that much for the main reason of being able to talk about you, he loved talking about you, you were his life, his soul, you were his everything, and as long as the teasing stayed aimed towards him most of the time, he was fun with it. You made him beyond happy, and if the guys thought that it was a little cringe, or moreso, majorly cringe, he didn’t care because at the end of the day, he still got to say he was with the most amazing girl in the world. 

“You gonna send me that picture yet or are you gonna make me wait until the tour is over???” He pulled out his phone to read the text from you when he finally sat down outside the gates at the airport, smiling at his phone screen which had your face as the wallpaper. 

Tours were the hardest part of your relationship because you had your own job to be at and you couldn’t just ask for days off, you had to request for them in advance, and Hyunjin wasn’t really the best at telling you about tour dates with much notice. Your relationship was built on trust, a lot of trust, because it was no secret that Hyunjin was by far the most handsome man in the universe-your words, not his-and you knew that a lot of people wanted him. Of course, Hyunjin only had eyes for you, you were the most beautiful girl in the universe, and everyone else-his words, not yours-was a goblin. 

“So impatient babe. Hold up, let me take one.” He teased back before opening his camera and snapping a quick selfie which, for anyone else, would be the worst angle, but with Hyunjin there were no bad angles. He quickly sent the picture with a heart as the caption, watching the little text bubbles pop up almost immediately. 

“How are you so perfect? How am I so lucky? Why are you going so far away this time? Dammit, I miss you. Come back home soon. I love you.” The text read, and his throat tightened as he felt the sudden urge to cry. His heart panged with a sadness and loneliness that he only felt when he was away from you. The tour hadn’t even officially started yet and he was already going through withdrawal from your kisses, your touch, the heat that emanated off your body when you were both curled up under the blankets at home. 

“Send me a selfie a day, I miss you too, you and your beautiful face. I love you so much more… I’ll be back home as soon as I can. We’re boarding now though, I have to turn my phone off. I’ll text you during the layover. I love you babe.” He quickly wrote back before turning his phone onto airplane mode and slipping it back into his pocket, the playful smile that he had been wearing a majority of the time falling ever so slightly. 

“You look like you’re gonna cry… You okay, man?” Seungmin asked, coming up from seemingly out of nowhere to stand beside Hyunjin as they walked through the gates. “Is it because you miss her? Oh man… You’re like… Love whipped or something. It’s weird. Good for you though. Shoulda brought the bunny slippers.” 

Love whipped… Was it a thing? Hyunjin wasn’t sure, not until now. He had heard of guys being whipped by only one other thing, and while he’d certainly, secretly, fall under that category as well, he loved you for so much more. He loved you for everything that you are, everything that you were, and everything that you will be. You had him wrapped around your finger, his heart was connected to yours. He loved you so much that it felt like he was being torn in two just being away from you. Yes, he was love whipped… But god, did he love the feeling of it. 

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[kiwiana-writes]

Kiwiana's Subscriber Shindig

I hit an absolutely wild (to me, anyway) AO3 subscriber milestone overnight, and after lying on the floor for a while about it, I want to CELEBRATE with a ficlet fest for all y'all who are so kind and supportive and just fucking awesome.

So! Feel free to send me:

A location: I absolutely encourage you to go buckwild here, because y'all know I love a challenge. You can also include a (vague) time period as well as a location if you want to, but you absolutely do not have to. (And there's no guarantee that if you don't send a time period it will be modern-day!)

A ship or focus character of your choice

Your username on AO3, if it differs from your tumblr username, so I can gift it to you there once it's written!

A maximum rating if you're not happy for it to go to E. I'm not saying all of them will, but... well, y'all know me, it's always a risk. So if you wouldn't want to read something E-rated, let me know what the highest rating you'd be happy with is.

And in return you get... a ficlet. Honestly, could be anywhere from 300 to 3000 words, depending on where the mood so takes me. 1-3 are required, though; I need something more than "IDK whatever you feel like" (that's what my normal WIP list is for 😅)

Important note the first: the idea here is a jumping-off point rather than a detailed prompt. So something like "FirstPrince at the barbershop" is awesome! "FirstPrince meet-cute at the barbershop where Alex accidentally comes onto Henry and then they hook up" is more detailed than I'm looking for for these (also I already wrote that one, so it'd be a waste of your time.)

Important note the second: if you're submitting your request on anon, you will still need to give me an AO3 username, please—I can only accept one submission per person, to keep it fair and ensure that I can in fact still write other stuff as well. If you don't have an AO3 account, I still have a few kicking around which will get you signed up faster than the current waitlist: you'll just need to DM me your email address :)

Slide on into my ask box with your request! Requests will be open until April 30th 11:59pm UTC and I'll start filling once requests are closed. REQUESTS ARE NOW CLOSED! Thanks, y'all; I can't wait to start writing these.

Love y'all, thanks for being awesome and really forcing me to confront my imposter syndrome lmao ❤️

[justabigassnerd]

Never Your Fault

Pairing - Ethan Hunt x daughter!reader

Word count - 6,254

Warnings - MAJOR DEAD RECKONING SPOILERS, death, injuries, blood, knives, violence, guilt, grief, nightmares

Summary - after witnessing a traumatic loss, you begin to blame yourself. can your dad help you out or is he too wrapped up in his own grief?

A/N - the first official part of the lil' Hunt series y'all! I'm so excited for y'all to read this I've been working so hard on it! it was really fun exploring these new dynamics and I genuinely enjoyed writing this so much (even if it was super painful at times). anyways I won't ramble anymore, as per y'all, please send in requests, feedback and enjoy!!!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Most people go to places like Italy on their holidays or maybe even visiting loved ones, but you and your dad? You travelled to Rome in search of a woman who had half of a key that was crucial in the shutting down of an ever-powerful AI named The Entity.

Your dad had been tracking Grace since she made off with half the key in the Abu Dhabi airport and had managed to track her down in Rome before she escaped his grasp once more. He, Ilsa, Benji, and Luther managed to track where Grace’s next move might be and it was in Venice, at the party held by someone Ethan and the IMF had dealt with before, Alanna Mitsopolis, better known as the White Widow. They figured if Grace was heading to Venice, then the person who hired Grace must be at that party or in the area.

Ethan decided that he and Ilsa would go to the party to see if they could track Grace or her buyer down while you, Benji, and Luther remained in the safe house and ran surveillance while the two were at the party.

“y/n, be good for Benji and Luther.” Ethan says as he tugs on his blazer, folding the collar down and checking he looked alright in the mirror before Ilsa walked in.

“Seriously? I’m not a kid you know.” You scoff jokingly as Ethan looks over at you with a grin.

“Well gotta put the warning down just in case. And if you want to leave the safe house, make sure Benji and Luther know where you are and-”

“Stick to lit areas and always stay alert. I know dad.” You finish his sentence for him, smiling up at him as he lets out a soft, breathy laugh.

“You’re too much like me, you know?” Ethan says softly, reaching out to tug you into his arms for a quick hug before pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“I love you, dad.” You say quietly, squeezing him a little before pulling away.

“I love you too, y/n/n.” Ethan replies before he releases you and he and Isla gather the last of their stuff and bid a last goodbye to the three of you remaining in the safe house before leaving.

“You’ve taught her well, Ethan. She’ll be just fine.” Ilsa says with a gentle smile upon seeing the hidden worry in Ethan’s eyes. She knew how much he worried about you and your well-being, but she also knew that he was protecting you as best he could. The two make their way out onto the streets of Venice and head in the direction of the party to begin their investigation.

Not long after you heard that Ilsa and Ethan had arrived at the party, you stretched your arms above your head and stood up from your chair once you relaxed.

“Guys, I’m going out for a walk. I haven’t gotten a chance to explore yet.” You say as you grab your jacket and throw it on before grabbing your phone.

“Location on?” Luther asks, glancing at the phone in your hand as you nod.

“You know it.” You reply as both Benji and Luther see your phone location appear on their screens.

“Yep, there you are. Be safe out there y/n.” Benji says, looking at you worriedly as you smile softly at him.

“Always am.” You say reassuringly, bidding Benji and Luther goodbye before exiting the safe house and beginning to wander the streets of Venice. You didn’t have a set location in mind and since it was relatively quiet out on the streets you decided to let your legs take you wherever they wanted to go. You’d never been to Venice before so you took in every sight you came across, knowing that you may not come back to this beautiful city again after this mission. You find yourself at one point sitting on a bench near one of the canals and admiring the stars in the sky, you always found the night sky so calming.

Meanwhile, at Alanna’s party, Ethan and Ilsa had tracked down Grace and discovered that Alanna was the one who hired her to steal the half of the key that Ethan had attempted to acquire in Abu Dhabi. They found out that Alanna was planning to sell it on to someone else and despite Ethan’s best efforts, he couldn’t convince her to not sell it. Gabriel stood before the four sat on the plush sofa and revealed that The Entity had been listening in and had infiltrated the party thanks to Gabriel and his men.

“Ethan Hunt. The Entity knows all about you. And your precious little daughter. y/n, is it? Yes, that’s the one.” Gabriel starts, noticing Ethan’s body tense up at the mention of your name and a twisted grin covered his face. He was getting the reaction he wanted and now he was going to have Ethan play right into The Entity’s plan. Ethan’s heartbeat was pounding in his ears, and he could barely focus on anything around him other than Gabriel and his sneer.

“The Entity has also decided that you have to pick someone to die. Ilsa, or y/n. You cannot save both Ethan.” Gabriel says, his grin widening as Ethan shoots to his feet, immediately held back by Gabriel’s men from attacking him.

“If you hurt either one of them, I swear, no one, not even your god will stop me from killing you.” Ethan growls angrily, fighting against the two men, desperate to launch at Gabriel who stands there and laughs at Ethan’s threats. Gabriel slinks off with a couple of men in tow after Alanna leaves and Ethan and Ilsa take the opportunity to attack the men to keep Ilsa safe and buy time for them to find out where you were so they could keep you safe too.

“Grace take this comm, Luther will guide you to someplace safe, I promise. Now go!” Ethan says, shoving a small communication device into Grace’s hand and encouraging her to get out while she still can.

“Benji, where is y/n? Is she with you?” Ethan says as he dodges a punch and quickly delivers a blow in retaliation.

“No, she left a while ago, said she wanted to go on a walk.” Benji says, his eyes fixed on his laptop as he hurriedly scans the map for your whereabouts.

“Connect me to her comm now!” Ethan says to Benji, landing a punch on an enemy, sending them stumbling back.

“She didn’t take one Ethan, but she does have her location on.” Benji says, hurriedly pulling up the map and searching for the dot that signals where you are.

“Give me directions to where she is right now.” Ethan says as Ilsa subdues the final man and they exchange a brief look before both running out of the building, dodging the men pursuing them from outside the building.

“Yes, directions… wait… what’s going…? Ethan, I’ve lost her she’s not on the map anymore.” Benji’s panicked voice comes through the comms and Ethan feels his blood run cold.

“Benji, where is she? Where is y/n?” Ethan’s voice was clearly panicked, and everyone could tell how worried he was about you. Benji was frantically typing away on his laptop trying to figure out why your signal had disappeared.

“Let’s split up and search while Benji tries to find her. We’ll cover more ground that way.” Ilsa says as the two duck into an alley to avoid being spotted.

“Are you sure?” Ethan asks. He knew Ilsa also had a bright red target on her back because of her closeness to him and he wasn’t willing to lose you or her to Gabriel or The Entity.

“I’ll be fine Ethan. Whoever finds her has to let the other know and we’ll rendezvous back at the safe house. Nothing more dangerous than the stuff we’ve already done.” Ilsa says softly, taking Ethan’s hand and squeezing it softly. The two silently agree on which direction they’re going to head in before leaving the safety of the alley and running off.

“Ethan, I’ve got her back on the map I’ll lead you to her now.” Benji’s voice comes over Ethan’s comm and he perks up, completely unaware that back in the safe house, Benji had not said a word and was instead staring at his laptop in confusion at the voice that eerily mimicked his own.

You were oblivious to everything that was going on as you walked around Venice. You stopped halfway across a bridge and just admired the quiet canal and the sky above before the sound of footsteps reached your ears. You barely glanced their way at first, expecting it to be a passerby who would do no more than maybe offer you a curt nod before continuing on their way but when you noticed out the corner of your eye that they were standing there staring at you, you turned to face them. Your breath hitched in your throat and your heartbeat picked up when you got a proper look at the man standing before you. He stood in front of you, a maniacal grin on his face as he stared down at you. Every instinct was screaming at you to run, to move, to do anything but your body wouldn’t co-operate. It was like you were frozen in place and nothing you did could make you move.

“y/n Hunt. I’ve been waiting a long time to meet you.” The man says, approaching you slowly and your brain finally kicks in enough to make you pull your small switchblade out of your pocket and flick the blade out. Your dad and Ilsa had taught you how to defend yourself should the occasion arise, but you had always hoped and prayed you would never have to.

“Who are you?” You ask, fighting to keep your voice from shaking as you tighten your grip on the handle of your weapon.

“Just an old friend of your father’s.” The man says simply, moving ever closer as you lift your hand that held the blade and ready yourself, your brain repeating everything your dad and Ilsa had taught you as the man launched at you. You managed to dodge his attack and came just shy of your blade meeting his skin. The fight consisted of a lot of back and forth between dodging attacks and trying to land them. You managed to slash the man a couple of times with your small blade before the weapon was knocked from your hand and you looked up at the man in terror before he punches you across the face and sends you to the ground, hitting your head on one of the stone steps of the bridge which makes your world grow dark in an instant.

Ilsa came across you first, instantly recognising Gabriel who reached down and tugged you up by your hair as he lifted his blade to your throat. You were unconscious and unable to fight back and Ilsa couldn’t just stand by and watch.

“In all the years I’ve known Ethan I’ve learnt he cares for everyone. But his daughter will always be his top priority.” Luther’s words echoed in Ilsa’s head as she noticed the switchblade gleaming in the moonlight and she wasted no time in scooping it up.

“Pick on someone your own size.”

When you come to, the first thing that registers is the sound of an engine and the splashing of water against the walls of the canal. Your head was throbbing as you carefully sit up, blinking your eyes to adjust to your surroundings. You glanced to the side as you caught sight of a blurry figure to your right and squinted your eyes to focus them and are surprised to see the man who attacked you was now missing and your dad had taken his place, kneeling over a figure as you force yourself to your feet.

“Dad, what’s going-” You immediately cut yourself off as you approach your dad, recognising the figure he was kneeling by. Tears instantly sprang to your eyes as you stared down at Ilsa. Her eyes were open but there was no sign of life within them. Your hand covered your mouth as you blinked back the tears. You were confused, and you were worried, but above everything, you were scared. You didn’t know who attacked you and whether they were behind Ilsa’s death or even who that man was working for and what his end goal was.

“y/n, Ethan, get in!” You hear the hushed, hurried voice of Benji which breaks you from your thoughts and you see him positioning the boat near the path so you could get in the boat. You shakily make your way towards the boat, taking Benji’s outstretched hand as he eases you down into the boat.

“Careful y/n, are you okay?” Benji asks worriedly, grabbing a cloth from the first aid kit and holding it against your temple, encouraging you to hold it firmly in place as you sit down on one of the seats. In your haze, you hadn’t noticed the blood that had run down your face from when your head hit on the step.

“I’m okay.” You say shakily, looking up at Benji with tear filled eyes.

“Luther will check you over once we’re back at the safe house, just to be on the safe side.” Benji says softly with a small smile before moving to help Ethan into the boat, Ethan refused to leave Ilsa’s body behind and so Benji helped Ethan load her body onto the boat and travel down the canal until he found a place to bury her. Somewhere quiet that he would be able to visit. When he found the perfect spot, he insisted he didn’t need any help and disappeared on his own to bury the woman he loved. When he returned, his face was set and he barely spoke to you or Benji, just silently confirming he wanted to go back to the safe house and Benji complied.

When you arrived back at the safe house, Ethan excused himself to go to the roof while Luther crossed to you, placing his hands on each of your shoulders which makes you look up at him.

“Benji, keep an eye on Grace, and check in with Ethan when he comes back down. y/n lets go to your room and I’ll check that head injury of yours.” Luther says, at first to Benji who moves to sit near Grace at the table while Luther grabs the first aid kit and carefully guides you to the small room you would use to sleep in. Luther doesn’t switch the main light on, instead flicking on a small lamp. He sits you down on the edge of the bed and sits alongside you, carefully taking your hand in his own and moving both it and the cloth away from your injury so he could take a look.

“The good news is the bleeding is slowing, I’ll bandage it up now, but I think it’s best if you don’t sleep just so we can keep an eye on you. How are you feeling right now?” Luther says gently, opening the first aid kit and finding an antiseptic wipe to clean the wound.

“A bit dizzy, but I’ll live.” You mumble, wincing slightly when the wipe comes into contact with the injury, but you didn’t complain, you felt like you deserved the pain for what happened.

“And how are you feeling?” Luther asks, scrunching up the wipe and tossing it on top of its packaging before grabbing some gauze.

“I just told you I-”

“No, I’m asking how you are feeling. Emotionally not physically.” Luther corrects you gently, carefully placing the gauze against your temple and asking you quietly to hold it in place while he gets the medical tape out.

“I got Ilsa killed Luther, how do you expect me to feel?” The words came out sharper than you meant them to. You didn’t mean to snap, not at Luther but the guilt was beginning to take hold, clinging onto you gleefully like some sort of malicious creature and whispering in your ear about how it was your fault.

“y/n, it wasn’t your fault.” Luther says, a gentleness to his voice only reserved for heart to hearts like this.

“The guy that attacked me wanted to kill me I know it. So why did he kill her instead?” You whisper, tears springing to your eyes again as you think of what had just transpired. You were the one who was supposed to be dead. Ilsa was supposed to be alive, and you knew it. Ilsa was dead and it was all your fault. Luther remained quiet for a moment, silently debating his next words. He knew he couldn’t tell you that Ethan had been given a choice to save you or Ilsa, not that Ethan would have ever made the decision. But he couldn’t let you sit by and blame yourself either.

“You can’t blame yourself for what happened it was out of your control.” Luther argues gently, beginning to put the medical tape along the gauze to keep it in place while you remain silent, Luther’s words seemingly hitting a brick wall. When Luther finishes patching you up, he gathers up everything he’s used and stands, looking down at you softly.

“We’ll be in the other room if you need us.” He says before leaving the room. You remain sat on the edge of your bed, various thoughts swimming through your head of how you could’ve saved Ilsa somehow.

“y/n, we need you in the other room. We’re going over the new plan.” Benji says as he opens the door, making you wonder how long you had zoned out and did nothing but listen to your thoughts. You nod lightly at Benji’s words, forcing yourself to your feet and heading into the next room. Grace was still sitting at the table under both Ethan and Luther’s watchful eyes as you enter behind Benji. As you sit at the table, Ethan starts going over the new plan, how both he and Grace would disguise themselves and get the other half of the key and then Ethan would leave the train and meet you and Benji at the rendezvous point so you could figure out the next move from there while Grace would let herself get arrested and get into contact with Kittridge so she could join the IMF. Gabriel, who you learnt was the man who attacked you, was the only man who knew how to use the key so learning what the key opened and how it worked was important to the mission. As Ethan walked Grace through what she had to do, you noticed Luther packing up his belongings and you noticed he hadn’t been mentioned once in the plan.

“What about you Luther?” You ask, confused when he looks up at you with a soft smile.

“I’m heading off the grid for a while, I have traces of The Entity on my hard drive, so I want to investigate it further. I’ll make contact when I have something.” Luther says, putting the last of his stuff in a bag and straightening up.

“I’ll see you around Ethan. Don’t kill Gabriel, we need him.” Luther says, clapping Ethan on the shoulder as he approaches him.

“Luther, wait!” You call quickly, leaping to your feet and rushing over to give the man a hug which he quickly reciprocates.

“I’ll see you around Lil’ Hunt.” Luther whispers as he hugs you back, bringing a small smile to your face at the nickname Luther had been calling you since the moment he first met you. After pulling away you bid Luther one final goodbye before he leaves to investigate The Entity further. After Luther leaves, Benji notices that the mask machine has broken while making the mask for Ethan.

“Grace, you’ll have to get on the train by yourself. I’ll figure out another way on.” Ethan says, glancing at Grace who is visibly worried by the news.

“Promise me you’ll be on that train.” Grace says to your dad, and you watch him carefully to see how he’ll respond.

“I promise.” Your dad responds, and despite the lack of emotion on his face, you knew he was being one hundred percent serious. He’d never let anyone who trusted him down if he could help it. Grace is then given a mask with Alanna’s likeness and is instructed to put it in a bag so she can board the Orient Express and track down Alanna. She’s also given a sedative to knock Alanna out long enough for Grace to take her place and retrieve both halves of the key.

“We should probably make a move guys; we don’t have long until the train is due to leave.” Benji points out, scooping what he needs into his bag while encouraging you to do the same, so you quickly go into your room and grab the stuff you need and shove them into a bag and sling it over your shoulder. The four of you then head down to the garage that was used for IMF vehicles. Ethan immediately grabs the motorbike, gets on it and looks at Benji.

“You take Grace to the train station. Get her on safely, okay?” He says directly to Benji, barely sparing you a second glance, making you look to the ground, fighting back any potential tears as you follow Benji to the car and get in the back seat while Benji gets behind the wheel and Grace gets in the passenger seat. You lean back against the seat and squeeze your eyes shut to fight back the tears further. Seeing your dad actively avoid looking at you was just confirmation to you that he thought it was your fault Ilsa was dead. That he wished you had been the one who died instead of her. You watch as your dad revs the engine and drives off, with Benji following. When you reach the train station that the Orient Express will stop at, Benji pulls over and lets Grace out, reassuring her that she’ll be just fine before watching her walk into the station.

“Come on y/n, get in the front.” Benji says with a smile, turning back to look at you and fighting back a frown when you shake your head.

“I need my co-pilot for this.” He then says, noticing how you perk up just a little at his words. He knew Ethan tried to keep you out of the IMF life as much as possible but Benji figured that helping out behind the scenes wouldn’t hurt and so he taught you all the technical stuff he knew and allowed you to help out if you wanted to. Convinced by his words, you move to sit in the passenger seat, smiling softly as Benji smiles back.

“Atta girl.” Benji says with a smile before starting the car up and beginning the drive to the rendezvous point. You figured it would be a straight shot and a lot of waiting around. Your dad already knew where he was going to attempt to board the train and Grace was already on it, so it was just you and Benji until your dad met you at the rendezvous point with the key.

“Benji, the train didn’t slow down I need another place to get on!” You hear your dad’s shout come over the comms as you exchange a worried look with Benji.

“y/n, get my tablet and pull up the map.” Benji quickly instructs and you do as he asks, opening the map and handing it to Benji as he puts the car on autopilot. You and Benji scour the terrain and areas your dad could use to get on the train. You notice it first, switching your comm off and pointing it out.

“He might not like it, but this seems like our best bet.” You say, glancing from the map to Benji who lets out a small sigh but nods regardless.

“Okay, this is where you need to go.” Benji takes over directing Ethan where to go while you remain silent, listening to the pounding of your heart echoing in your ears. When you heard your dad confirming he reached the top of the mountain and wondering how he was going to get down you started to worry. Benji insisted he’d be fine since he had his parachute but when your dad’s comm went silent you started to worry that you had caused your dad’s death as well.

By the time you had reached the rendezvous point, you had confirmation that your dad had made it onto the train, but you didn’t hear from him after that, leaving you to wonder if he was okay.

“He’ll be fine. He’s Ethan and nothing stops Ethan.” Benji says reassuringly, noticing you fidgeting and the obvious tension in your body.

“I could’ve gotten him killed with that mountain idea.” You mumble, looking down and fiddling with the charm bracelet that sat proudly on your right wrist.

“It’s the only way Ethan could’ve gotten to the train, there were no other chances for him to get on. Your dad knows what he’s doing, and I bet it won’t be long until he turns up.” Benji says reassuringly, shuffling in his seat so he can face you as best he can. When you remain silent, Benji speaks up again.

“Are you okay, y/n? You seemed shaken up on the bridge and I haven’t gotten a chance to check in with you yet.” Benji asks softly, worry written across his face as he remembers watching you realise that Ilsa had died.

“It’s my fault Ilsa died, isn’t it? And dad thinks it’s my fault too.” You mumble, your gaze not moving from the bracelet as you flick one of the silver charms lightly, watching as it flies away from your finger due to the impact and then bounces harmlessly off your wrist. As you stared at your bracelet you neglected to see Benji’s expression shift to one of shock at the realisation that you were not only blaming yourself but thinking Ethan blamed you too.

“y/n/n, Ilsa’s death was not your fault at all. You didn’t even know what was happening because-”

“You’re right, I didn’t know what was happening and I should’ve. I should’ve taken a comm with me so I would know if anything was happening, like some mad man wanting to kill me. I should’ve known so I could’ve gone back to the safe house and Ilsa and dad wouldn’t have had to run around Venice looking for me.” You say, frustrated tears filling your eyes as more potential ways you could’ve saved Ilsa pop into your head.

“y/n, even if you did have a comm it wouldn’t have helped that much. The Entity managed to mimic my voice and use it to lead Ethan somewhere else when I was trying to figure out where you were because it wiped your signal from the map so I couldn’t lead your dad or Ilsa to you to keep you safe.” Benji explains, his heart breaking for you, wishing he could take this pain away from you because in his eyes you didn’t deserve it.

“It doesn’t change the fact that dad obviously blames me. He couldn’t even look at me before we left, and he didn’t talk to me either.” Your voice was no louder than a whisper now as the tears escaped their confinement and rolled down your cheeks. Benji’s face softened when he saw how upset you were and placed a gentle hand on your shoulder.

“Ethan would never blame you for what happened to Ilsa. He’s just trying to put the mission first, so he doesn’t have to deal with his emotions. You know what he’s like. Try and talk to him when we make it to the next safe house, it’ll do you both some good to talk things over.” Benji says softly, squeezing your shoulder gently to make you look up at him, eyes still filled with tears.

“I know you’ve got it in your head that your dad blames you, but he couldn’t. Ethan knows it’s not your fault. It’s Gabriel’s.” Benji assures as you sniffle lightly, reaching up with your hand to wipe at your eyes harshly.

“Benji, I’m on my way now stand by.” Before you had a chance to respond, Ethan’s voice crackles over the comms and you immediately move to sit in the back of the car, knowing it’ll be the easiest way to avoid talking to your dad. You waited with bated breath for your dad to arrive and as soon as he landed, he took his parachute off and loaded into the car.

“I got it, Benji. We’ve gotta get somewhere to lay low and get into contact with Luther to let him know we’ve got it.” Ethan says, holding up the key to show off that he has it while you curl into yourself in the backseat, avoiding even looking in your dad’s direction as Benji starts the car to drive to a safe house you could use to lie low in. Halfway through the journey, Benji glanced in his rearview mirror and saw you staring out the window intently, tears evident in your eyes and fought back a frown as he then glanced at Ethan out of the corner of his eyes and saw him focused on the road ahead.

The drive to the new safe house was silent other than the rumbling of the engine, and when Benji parked the car in the garage you were quick to jump out, grab your bag and disappear in the building, leaving Benji and Ethan behind. Benji, having had enough of the silence, turns to Ethan.

“Ethan, mate, you need to talk to y/n. She’s not okay right now and I know the mission is important, but I think right now your daughter is more important. You weren’t the only one there when you found Ilsa. She blames herself, Ethan.” Benji says, his tone gentle but with a certain strength in his voice showing how he wanted to get his point across. Ethan briefly looks in the direction of where you had gone and nods so lightly that the movement was almost imperceivable. Ethan decided to wait until he could find an appropriate time to talk to you since he needed to get into contact with Luther and try and figure out where to start searching for the Sevastopol so he can end The Entity. Before he knew it night had fallen and when he sticks his head in the room you decided to occupy to see if you were awake, he was greeted with the sight of you curled up in bed. He pressed his lips into a firm line and backed out of the room, vowing to talk to you in the morning.

What Ethan didn’t know was that you were faking it. You couldn’t fall asleep no matter how hard you tried. Every time you closed your eyes you were greeted with the image of Isla’s dead body on the bridge and the heartbreak in your dad’s eyes. Your brain refused to let up as you continued to try, coaching yourself through methods your dad had taught you to help you get to sleep. After hearing silence fall around the safe house and realising that everyone has gone to bed, you get up, grabbing a blanket and tugging it around your shoulders as you head out onto the balcony to sit and watch the stars.

An hour after you went out onto the balcony, Ethan shot up in bed, panting heavily as flashes of his nightmare replay in his head, making him squeeze his eyes shut in an attempt to rid of them but immediately regretting his actions when he sees the dead body on the bridge again, but instead of Ilsa, it was you. Opening his eyes again, Ethan pushes himself off the bed and heads to your room, wanting to check in on you just to prove to himself that you were fast asleep and safe within the building. When he opened the door, he squinted to search for your figure beneath the covers, but panic rose in his chest when he realised you weren’t there. He rushed over to the bed to look for any signs of a struggle but when he found nothing, he left your room to look for anything that might clue him into your whereabouts, pausing as he walked past the doors that went out onto the balcony when he noticed a figure outside and when he focused, he realised it was you.

At first, Ethan’s instinct was to head out onto the balcony and scold you for disappearing without letting him know but just as he reached for the door handle, he took a step back and allowed himself to gather his thoughts. Had his nightmare not awoken him and made him want to check on you, you would’ve simply remained out on the balcony until you felt ready to come back in and he would’ve woken up in the morning none the wiser. You hadn’t left the safe house. You just needed a moment. After taking a deep breath, Ethan opens the door carefully before stepping out onto the balcony and closing the door behind him. You didn’t turn to face him, your gaze remained fixed on the stars that had provided you endless comfort night after night and when Ethan stepped closer, he noticed the tear tracks on your cheeks.

“Couldn’t sleep?” He asks softly, resting his forearms against the cool metal railings and joining you in looking up at the sky.

“Every time I tried; I saw Ilsa.” You mumble, blinking as another few tears roll down your cheeks. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Ethan turn his head to look at you.

“I’m sorry you were there. I should’ve been there to protect you.” You hear your dad say and that sentence made you finally tear your gaze away from the sky to look at your dad who had tears of his own shining in his eyes.

“It wasn’t your fault dad. Benji told me about The Entity mimicking his voice to throw you off.” You say, a sad smile on your face as you look at him before looking up at the moon, admiring how its crescent shape shone in the darkness.

“It wasn’t your fault either. Gabriel was already two steps ahead of me when he said he was going to kill you or Ilsa. He made it practically impossible for both of you to survive by distracting me.” Ethan says softly, getting your attention once more as he watches you softly.

“But Ilsa died.” You argue, watching how Ethan nods forlornly but his eyes never lose their gentleness.

“She did. But that doesn’t mean I’d want you in her place. It was never your fault that she died.” Your dad says, reaching out to wipe the tears that had fallen down your cheeks. He catches them softly on his thumbs and swipes them away as he considers his next words.

“Ilsa knew what she was getting into. She died protecting you because Gabriel had gotten to you first. I will miss her as long as I’m alive and I will always love her, especially because she saved you.” Ethan then says, silently asking for permission to pull you into a hug which you allow him to do, clinging to him as you fight back more tears.

“I wish there was something I could’ve done to have her with us right now.” You whisper, biting down on your lip to stop more tears from falling.

“Me too, sweetheart. But we can avenge her by using the key to destroy The Entity, and after that, I’m not going to let Gabriel get away again.” Ethan swears, a hand reaching up to run through your hair before he presses a gentle kiss to the top of your head before suddenly being reminded of the injury you sustained.

“Your head, is it okay?” He asks, pulling away slightly to look at the gauze that was covering the injury.

“It’s feeling a lot better than it was.” You admit, a small smile appearing on your face as you look up at your dad who mirrors your smile.

“I’m sorry for not realising how you felt sooner. I was just overwhelmed by losing Ilsa and I let the mission get-“

“Dad, it’s okay. Getting the key was important. And I know you miss Ilsa. Your grief is valid, and I never wanted to make you feel like it wasn’t. I know I’m your daughter and you want to protect me, but you can talk to me, and I’ll try to help.” You say and instead of replying verbally, Ethan pulls you in for another hug, squeezing you gently as he plants another kiss on the top of your head.

“I love you so much, y/n.” He whispers, allowing himself to relax as he holds you safely in his arms.

“I love you too, dad.” You reply, cuddling as close to your dad as possible as you spare the night sky one last glance.

You’d be okay.

[uhhlifeig]

ABOUT ME!

Hey, y'all! I'm Emi, my pronouns are she/they, and I'm bi. This is a safe space for everyone!!

I am in the Marauders, PJO, HP, RWRB, and HOO fandoms (former DSMP fan, would always love to discuss).

My fave musicians rn are Måneskin, Derivakat, and Conan Gray.

Fave painting is Gathering Storm bc not only does it have LORE, it's also just really pretty.

I AM A MINOR. DO NOT SEND WEIRD MESSAGES. ALSO, PLEASE DON'T SPAM MY INBOX WITH DONATION REQUESTS.

Sirius and Regulus and Remus kinnie!

I play the piano and paint, and I write things sometimes.

MY PROMPTS LIST: HERE

MY AO3: SeaingStars (well, well, well. what do we have here? a shameless self advertisement.)

Go ahead! Take a read!

^Writer Evan is stalked by murderer Barty. Chase ensues.

^Slytherin Sirius and Gryffindor Remus have an illicit relationship. Sirius's parents find out, and stuff hits the fan.

^(ON AN INDEFINITE HIATUS, JULES IS GOING THROUGH SOMETHING RN) A longfic Jules and I are working on! updates every other Saturday. Gryffindor Regulus, no Peter exclusion, may actually increase update times bc I think it's too slow.

^A Ravenrock (Peter x Benjy) rivals to lovers fic, no Voldemort and also background Jily.

I'm looking for more beta readers! DM me if you want to apply.

Normal DNI, but I'll reiterate it. DNI if you're a homophobe, transphobe, TERF, against furries/therians, racist, sexist, support pedophilia/zoophilia, if you try to force your religion onto others, if you support Israel, if you're a JKR apologist, and if you support problematic people.

Feel free to send me requests/prompts to put on my list. I promise everything will be worked on, just slowly.

And don't expect me to reply immediately! As stated above, I am a minor, meaning I have to go to school. Please be patient!

MY TAGS:

#emi writes sometimes - my writing tag, mostly for microfics

#emi reblogs stuff - my reblogs, conversationally and otherwise

#emi yaps - my original posts that aren't stories/asks

#emi answers! - me responding to asks

#hi finn - say hi to finn, hes a lil guy

#hey mars - ITS MARS MY WIFEY /p

#sup estelle - FOLLOW THEM. NOW. DO IT.

FAVE MOOTS:

@moutainrusing!! they were my first moot, and we chit-chat a lot!

@marsmarauders - GAY PANIC (platonic guys, im still single 🙃) and also BESTIE BOO

@mezsygfs - we're married. (they play sirius, i play remus. and also they played regulus in one of the rps i play james in lol WERE DESTINED TO BE TOGETHER)

@yourlocalbadgerscales - slay. same person, different font lol

@discoveredreality - literally awesome

@finntheworm81 - this is finn. go say hi to him. (hes my platonic husband)

@sxmnc - we talk about hot italians lmao

@estellethewriter - estelle!!!!! literally regulus and also GO SAY HI TO THEM. FOLLOW HER. THIS IS A THREAT

@smuttylyra - awesome. bestie. great and also slightly unhinged.

@allonsy-moony - i literally love you sm /p YOURE AWESOME AND GREAT AND HAVE I MENTIONED AWESOME (a fellow wo/men kisser)

@a-t1r3d-b1s3xual - bestie boo!!! you're so slay pookie <333 and IVE LEARNED TO DRAW FIGURES IM SO CLOSE TO DRAWING PEOPLE I PROMISE (also a fellow wo/men kisser)

tell me if you want to be added to this list!

SIDEBLOGS:

@not-a-fork - my James Potter RP acc! contact @.corey-writes-stuff to join

@siriusly-attractive - my Sirius Black RP acc! contact me to join

@not-pineconed - my Thalia Grace RP acc! contact @.permetutotheworld to join

@moony-days - my Remus Lupin RP acc (i'm collecting them all, just like pokemon)! contact @.boundbymoonlight to join

@astronomic-nerd - my Regulus Black RP acc! it's a band AU with prongsfoot, jegulus, and moonwater (poly, no incest). contact @.ieatglowsticks to join

@my-father-owns-a-farm - my Mary MacDonald RP acc! contact @aesthetic-writer18 to join

@marls-boro - my Marlene McKinnon RP acc! contact @.julia-lokidottier to join

@bambiwantstobemefr - my second James Potter RP acc! contact @.anything-for-my-moony-1971 to join

@thestarryhunter - my Orion Black RP acc! (its the generation before the marauders era) contact @.cheekyboybeth to join

@depressed-poets-unite - my second Regulus Black RP acc! temporarily inactive, but i'd love to join another rp!

@forever-sirius - my second Sirius Black RP acc! dm/send a non-anon ask to @.cissa-n0ble-blck to join

[junhui-png]

Starring: love ˙✧˖📷 ⋆｡ ˚ PT. 2

actor!jeonghan x fem!reader

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Summary: You always had trouble finding love, but that never bothered you as you like to be independent. You had opened a cafe on Main Street all by yourself and things were going great without a boyfriend so you simply thought “Who needs a boyfriend anyways?”? But that changed once you had met the man of everyone’s dreams, Yoon Jeonghan.

Notes: hope y'all enjoy part 2 and also for such a late post I honestly just got really lazy and never felt like writing so my apologizes. I'll update this series once a week! (mainly on Thursdays)

Warnings: Cursing, Reader is an academic weapon, Nicknames (Doll, princess, gorgeous), please LMK if there's more!

wc: 1.6K

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The weeks went by faster than you had realized. Jeonghan still stopped by your cafe between his breaks and he's supposedly grown a liking towards you, at least that's what Sohee says. As the closing time of your cafe neared, you heard the bell from the entrance ring, and with no surprise, it was Yoon Jeonghan walking through the door. His outfit was quite different than the ones the stylists would normally put him in. He was wearing a white button-down, which where tucked into his pair of black dress pants and a black tie to bring the outfit all together. "What can I get you" Jeonghan looked up at the menu as if he hadn't already memorized all of it because of how frequently he visited "Just 2 iced americano". "Two?" you thought to yourself but you just nodded and got to work on the man's drinks. "Hey, Jeonghan?" Your voice so quiet you could barely hear it, but Jeonghan had heard you "Yes?" Jeonghan got up from where he had previously been seated and walked towards the pick-up section "You don't really like iced Americano's, right?" You ask, curiosity getting the better of you. Jeonghan lets out a sigh and begins to look around the cafe, as if he were avoiding your eyes "Yeah, just felt like a change today" He shrugs, finally bringing his eyes to meet you but you immediately look away. You didn't dare ask the second question that you had. "Who was the second one for?". "Alright, here you go" You bring yourself back from your thoughts and place Jeonghan's drinks on the table. You give Jeonghan a quick smile before turning your back towards him and beginning to clean up and get ready for closing "Hey Y/N?" Jeonghan's angelic voice sends chills down your spine. You turn around to face Jeonghan who has one of the iced americanos in his hand and the other still on the table "Go on a date with me." silence. "Are you joking?" Is what came out of your mouth, though you didn't intend it to. "Did you want it to be?" Jeonghan says in a teasing manner, slightly raising his right eyebrow. Silence engulfs the two of you as you're at a loss of words. Did you want it to be a joke?. "No.." you finally get out and Jeonghan seems quite satisfied with your response because a devious smirk appears on his lips. "Ok then, Tomorrow at 6 ?" you can only nod in response as you feared that if you were to open your mouth you would fuck everything up. Jeonghan chuckles a bit realizing you had completely shut down "Wear something nice, ok?" Jeonghan pushes one of the iced americanos towards you before taking his and walking out, leaving you completely stunned. You aren't left in the dark for long as you get a text from Sohee.

"What took you so long, I was about to leave you here." Sohee nags once you finally finished cleaning and locked up for the day "Sorry, some last minute stuff" You shrug but Sohee always knows when something's up "I saw Jeonghan leave the cafe just now~" Sohee giggles, grabbing a hold of you arm. You already knew where this was going "What's up with you too" Sohee drags you from side to side as if he were trying to shake something out of you "Did he ask you out?" You didn't even get to respond when Sohee gasped loudly, shaking you vigorously. "I FUCKING KNEW IT, I LITERALLY TOLD YOU HE WANTED YOU!" Sohee jumps up and down, still holding onto your arm. "I didn't even say anything!" You try and defend yourself but Sohee shuts you down almost immediately "You suck at hiding your facial expressions" Sohee giggles, which you roll your eyes at in response "Fuck you." You scoff, finally pulling yourself away from the boy.

The next day had arrived and you were beyond nervous. You decided to wear a black tube top dress that stopped just above your knees, a black shoulder bag, a simple silver necklace with a singular diamond pendant at the center, and a pair of black heels. You finish your makeup and rush out your apartment door, making your way towards your cafe. As you approach your cafe, you see a black BMW parked right in front of the cafe. The closer you got, the tenser you became but the second you saw Jeonghan, all of it disappeared. "Hello beautiful," He says teasingly but he truly meant it. You looked absolutely stunning to him and he simply wanted to just stare at you for hours on end. "Hi," You lower your head sheepishly, your face getting hot. Jeonghan opens his car door, taking your hand as he helps you enter his car. You somehow completely forgot that this man was a celebrity, an extremely rich and famous one at that. Jeonghan begins to drive and there is silence between the two of you, not awkward silence but more comfortable silence, or at least that's what Jeonghan thought. You, on the other hand, was a whole other story. Now that it's kinda dawned on you that you're going on a date with a celebrity, you start to second-guess basically your entire existence, well that's what it felt like. You felt underdressed compared to Jeonghan, who was wearing a silk-like white shirt tucked into a pair of black dress pants with his pretty black hair pulled up in a half up half down type hairstyle (what he wore to that Saint Laurent event). Though the outfit was quite simple, the way it looked on Jeonghan made it look exquisite and expensive, which it probably was. "You look stressed," Jeonghan says breaking the silence "Do I?" You finally look up from your lap and at Jeonghan whose eyes are on the road "Yeah, don't be though" You scoff at his response and only then does he take his eyes off the road to look at you "I'm going out with a fucking celebrity, what do you mean 'don't be'" You say in a sarcastic tone and Jeonghan smirks at your snarky response "Tonight, Don't think of me as a celebrity, just think of me as Jeonghan, just another human on this planet" You liked the thought of that. Just Jeonghan. "Welp, we're here" Jeonghan gets out of the car and opens the car door for you before handing his car keys to the valet attendant and walking you into a fancy Italian restaurant. You're both seated at a table in the corner and are given menus before the two of you are finally left alone. "So.." Jeonghan begins "When'd you open your cafe?" He asks "Back when I was about 19?" You shrug, Jeonghans eyebrows shoot up in surprise "Dam you were young then" Jeonghan remarks, leaning back in his seat. "What about school and shit?" he asks. "Honestly," you respond "I was pretty smart in high school and throughout college, so It wasn't something I was worried about, I managed." Jeonghan lets out a playful sigh "Wish I had that struggle" he quips, a slight smirk on his face. "Oh come on, you couldn't have been that dumb" You reassure him "Nah I was, the lowest of my class actually" He chuckles "Was too caught up with training and friends and stuff to really care about studying and my grades, you know" with a hint of sarcasm you respond "Actually not really" teasing him a bit and the man seems to enjoy it as he lets out a laugh.

The two of you order your food and continue to chat, even after finishing your food, the two of you sit for an extra hour simply just talking. "We should probably leave" You suggest and Jeonghan nods, getting up from his seat and you follow. "Thanks for tonight Jeonghan," You say once you enter the car "I really enjoyed myself" You beamed "Don't mention it doll, I enjoyed myself as well" The nickname caught you off guard and very visibly too because Jeonghan seems to smirk taking a look at your flustered expression. Once you finally reach the outside of your apartment, Jeonghan helps you out of his car "Wait hold on" Jeonghan stops you from going up the stairs of your apartment complex. He runs towards his car and opens the back door of his car, picking up a grey zip-up hoodie from the back seat and brings it towards you. "Here" he takes both of your hands and places the zip-up hoodie in them "What's this for?" You scoff "It's cold these days," He says "And I just wanted to, thought you would look good in it" His voice is teasing, though you would find it annoying if it was someone else (Sohee) you didn't mind because it was Jeonghan. After a further examination of the hoodie, you realize it wasn't necessarily plain. It had a little blue and red flower on the front side of it with the wording "KENZO PARIS" on it. "Thanks, Jeonghan, I didn't get you anything though" You sulk a bit, wishing you would have known he would have gotten you something "I don't need any gifts from you, you're my gift for tonight," He says, the return of his signature teasing tone is evident "You're too much" You laugh, pushing his shoulder just a bit. "Maybe" He shrugs, a stupid smile on his face. He walks you up to your apartment till you are both at your doorstep "Lemme see your phone" Jeonghan puts his hand in front of you and you immediately hand it to him unlock, all survival instincts being left behind. After a few seconds, Jeonghan hands you back your phone, now with his contact saved "Text me, ok?" He says and you nod "Goodnight princess" He smiles "Night Jeonghan" You smile back before shutting the door behind you, officially ending your first date with Jeonghan.

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[miloformula123fan]

I really want to see the arthur leclerc x verstappen! male! reader since we dont have much of him

okay, if you want something driver based instead of this mafia fic, I will be writing it at some point :)

also sorry this took me so long to get out I tossed a few options here and there before deciding on this one :)

Okay I came up with this so it’s a little different to the original moodboard, but if you want something accurate to the moodboard, see here

if you want to participate in my 100 followers event, look here :)

(hint hint: this closes on Thursday 1st March 0:00 GMT, so if you want to make a request do so soon because this is in a little more than a week when publishing this :))

Please keep requesting - y'all have awesome ideas we agree on a lot of stuff :) - my guidelines are here, and if you want some prompts, they are here.

also feel free to come in and start chatting to me in my asks, would love to get to know y'all better

and if you want to be added to my taglist lmk :)

Also…i know there’s all the shit going around about christian horner, i just want to say that i don’t condone his actions at all, and while I have left him in this fic, I am separating the character from the person.

also warnings: death, general mafia shittiness, homophobia, bad dad jos

arthur leclerc x male!verstappen!reader

“Ermitage will be safe for you, Y/N. It has kept Max safe for years and I trust their teachers. Professor Marko, who will teach english, Professor Horner who will teach history and public speaking, and Professor Dominicelli who is the head teacher all sing their praises of Max, and have helped your admission into the school. The school does not regularly take students mid year, however based on your prior behaviour and safety. I needed to send you here.”

Y/N scoffed at his fathers words. His ‘prior behaviour’ wasn’t all that bad. Max had been sent to this school for an arson attack that had almost resulted in the deaths of 5 people, including 3 of his dad’s own men. He was being sent to this school for running away from his bodyguards, drinking and making out with a boy. But Max was his father’s golden boy, and Y/N was the spare in case a rival gang took out Max. And he was sure that Max despised the 2 of the professors, based on his letters to Y/N. He seemed to adore Professor Horner, so maybe that would be Y/N’s respite.

As the car pulled up in front of the school and crunched on the gravel driveway, Y/N took a minute to admire it.

He smiled as he saw the young children running around near the junior school. He got out of the car, smiling as he felt the warm French sum combined with a small breeze. The car had pulled up on the other side of the driveway, in between 2 other buildings. One looked very traditional, however there had clearly been an extension or five as parts looked very modern with a lot of glass. The other building was gorgeous. The other building was very traditional, looking like one of Jos’ summer houses in Denmark, all white and clearly spacious, however it had a metal spiral staircase on the outside that led to the roof. Jos would’ve killed a builder if that had been left there at their house. It made the building look less professional, and even Y/N wasn’t sure that he liked it.

Y/N watched as 3 men came out from the doors of the building. The 2 in front, both had greying hair and stern expressions, whispering amongst each other, while making disgusted looks towards Y/N. The third looked a little younger and shorter, with grey hair, attempting to look serious and stern as he walked towards the 2 with Y/N’s big brother in tow. Y/N smiled as his brother walked out with the teachers. He looked happy and better and less like he’d just torched a building than the last time he had seen him. Max whispered something in the younger man’s ears and the mask of sterness dropped to smile at the boy.

The group reached the pair of Verstappens, and Max let his guard down a little after shaking hands with their dad to give his baby brother a big bear hug, and provide some intel.

“Who’d he catch you with, huh?”

“Liam. At least it wasn’t bloody Frederik or he’d be here to inform you that I got caught up in the crossfire of a shooting and my funeral is tomorrow.”

“It was simply a matter of time. Anyway, you will like it here. Try and steer clear of Marko, he is incredibly strict and if it was still legal he would hang you from your arms from the roof until your shoulders dislocated. You will barely see Dominicelli, he just rocks up to greet you now, and you will never see him again. Horner is also our housemaster. He’s amazing. He’ll like you. He kinda adopted me after I told him how much of an asshole dear father is.”

“Okay.” Y/N smiled tensely as he pulled himself out of his brother’s hug and turned to greet the 3 strangers.

The first one looked old, as in old enough to retire, and had a stern face, as in someone who would scold you for laughing too hard. Someone after his fathers’ own heart he presumed. He held his hand out, and the man took it,  shook it once, and then dropped his hand, as if disgusted to be touching ‘someone like Y/N’. So an old homophobe then. He then turned around and started talking to Jos, and  Y/n tried to eavesdrop as he met the other men.

“Lawson has been dealt with, I’m just concerned about…”

The 2nd man, held out his hand and shook Y/n’s twice which was an improvement, at least until he dropped it. 

“...he sort of always showed signs but I never thought…”

Then he tried to discreetly wipe his hand on his pants.

“...The Mercedes guys were there, if they had realised who he was…”

Y/N picked it up, and looked down at the ground, slightly awkward, unsure of what to do as the final teacher approached him.

“...Hamilton is pissed, one of his men was caught in the crossfire of trying to get Y/N out…”

Professor Horner immediately engulfed him in a tight hug.

“...see the problem is I can’t explain to anyone why they were shot in a random club on a random thursday to get my son out…”

It was the first time for a long time that Y/N was getting a hug from someone older like her dad’s age. He was so shocked that he missed the next part of Jos and Helmut’s conversation and strained to hear the next part.

“...i can’t tell them my son was in there…so now it looks like i shot up a nightclub for no reason…”

Christian started reassuring him in his ears about how he was safe here and whatnot, but all Y/N was thinking was about how he was preventing him from properly eavesdropping the conversation

“...No, no one important, a lackyman, Aron or something…”

Y/N could feel his heart drop. Paul was dead? He’d known Liam was dead, Jos had used him as an example, but he hasn’t even known that Paul was at the nightclub.

“...it’s done, there’s 2 dead bodies to dispose of, which im gonna do when i get back, but just keep an eye on him please…”

Christian seemed to realise the internal struggle that Y/N was having and started hugging him tighter to make him feel better.

“...He’s gonna get everyone killed and he will only realise when he loses his brother the consequences his actions have…”

‘I KNOW WHAT CONSEQUENCES MY ACTIONS HAVE DAD, YOU KILLED MY KIND OF BOYFRIEND IN FRONT OF ME!’ Y/N wanted to scream at his dad, but that would make him realise that he was eavesdropping and why he was actually here.

Christian felt him tense and tried to sooth him into the hug.

“Alright, that’s enough, Christian, how about we head inside?”

—

Arthur could recognise the boy walking in, but he couldn’t see the father which would help if he could work out why his body was in fight and flight mode as the boy had seen him, waved and smiled at him.

A memory flashed, of a meeting him and all his brothers together in a meeting room, as their father ran them through their highest enemies. He could remember the smile of a kid his age. He remembered Lorenzo asking how a 5 year old could be a threat…he doesn’t remember the rest or why this kid is a threat, but he remembers the goofy smile, the smile that was being flashed his way now, and the eyes that held so much happiness that seemed to hold a lot more pain now.

He couldn’t remember why this kid was in the powerpoint, so he supposed it was okay and irrelevant and smiled back, before being hurried on by Lorenzo.

---

taglist: @leosxrealm, @ghostking4m

[asksebs]

It's been quite a while since I've done anything even remotely close to this, so please bear with me as I slowly figure this out.

This is so stupid..

Welcome, welcome! You'll never BELIEVE who just got access to an account on this site.

If you guessed Sebastian Solace, then yeah. You're right.

Guess we're doing whatever this is now. Great.

RULES

(More will be added AS NEEDED)

- Suggestive things are fine, I guess. Just PLEASE, don't drop by and send something that's nothing but straight NSFW.

- You want to claim an anon title? Is that even something that you guys do? Go crazy. Do it. Hell, I'll even keep a list of all of you guys that stop by below.

- Look, I'm not one to judge- wanna send in one of those 'RP asks'? Be my guest. ‘RP chains’ in reblogs are welcome, too. Knock yourself out.

- I've heard some stuff about 'drama' as of late- I really don't know what any of that's about, but for the love of GOD, PLEASE keep that stuff out of my inbox.

ANONS

- “Smiley” anon

- 🎃 anon

- Adopted anon

- Sleep parareles rat anon

- 🐈‍⬛ anon

- Haunted anon arc

- Dancing anon

- 🪼🦪 anon

- Silas/Z-VO13 (anon)

- Seal anon

- Long arms anon

- Seanon slug (anon)

- 7 anon

- ​Arnold Wimskins 🐷🌺 (anon)

- smollo anon

- 🐝🐝 (anon)

- PinkEye (anon)

- 📟 (anon)

- 🐍🌊 (anon)

- five data anon

- rat anon 🐀

- 𝄢 (anon)

- paws anon

- 📄💣 (anon)

- Rich anon

- ☣️ (anon)

TAGS

#ask sebastian - Exactly what it sounds like. An archive of your asks and my answers, all under one tag.

#sebastianposting - Whatever shenanigans I end up getting up to and posting on here. Gotta keep you guys entertained with something other than just answering questions.

#sebastian updates - any updates that I feel like sharing with you guys.

#ooc ask - || out of character asks!!

EXTRA

@bucketfan427 here! decided to make a Sebastian Solace ask blog because fish fictionkin brainrot has been hitting HARD as of late-

if at any point I post something that's ooc, I'll do so by writing like this (see below) to make it easier!

|| Hello everyone!

Here's to hoping y'all enjoy whatever silly stuff comes from this blog.