#i love the rain but not while im trying to keep my homework dry

[meganwasbored]

whoever thought that outdoor schools in california was a good idea just because we dont have snow conveniently forgot that rain exists

[today-we-will-survive]

07. Save Me

A story based on the fictional HYYH world about six boys with unimaginable problems and their friend that can’t do anything to help.

Member: Jungkook

Genre: Angst

Warning: warnings are in the masterlist

Word Count: 6.5K

Parts can be found on my Masterlist under “The Most Beautiful Moment In Life”

A/N: New parts every Tuesday and Friday

You can only pick up the pieces and paste them back together so many times before they no longer fit.

April.

One evening when Jungkook was ten, he and his parents were driving home from the grocery store. This was a weekly occurrence with them. One he always looked forward to because he and his dad would race each other down the aisles. This particular night, it was raining really hard. So hard that the wipers were working at a rapid pace to try and keep the windshield clear and the street visible. The sound, though a bit jarring, was repetitive enough to turn into a sort of rhythm. One that had Jungkook’s eyelids growing heavy until he slumped against the door, face pressed against his palm, and he drifted to sleep.

When he opened his eyes again, it wasn’t to the sound of rain on the metal car roof or the double time beat of the windshield wipers. It was to the beeps of monitors and quiet conversations between strangers. It was too bright. Too white. Too sterile. It took him several seconds to realize he was lying in a bed in a hospital room. And his parents weren’t in there with him.

The night they were all coming home from grocery shopping, a semi truck had run a red light and smashed into them. His dad had been killed instantly and his mom only lived for another week before dying in the hospital of complications. The crash had put Jungkook in a coma and by the time he came out of it, he didn’t have parents. He’d fallen asleep on the way home from the store and woken up in the hospital two weeks later, completely alone in the world.

For several months after the wreck, he’d withdrawn into himself, and while he barely ever spoke a word to anyone during that time, the voice in his mind screamed at the heavens, demanding to know why he had lived. Why his family had been taken. Why he couldn’t have gone with them. He’d heard a nurse say back in the hospital that the only reason he survived was because, since he’d been asleep, his body was limp, therefore absorbed most of the impact, unlike his parents who, as anyone else anticipating a collision would, tensed up. It’s why drunk drivers so often walk away from a crash when their victim doesn’t. If he would have been awake, maybe he’d be wherever his parents were too. Maybe they could be together.

He’d been in the foster system ever since then. Being moved from fake family to fake family,  temporary house to temporary house so quickly sometimes he didn’t even get the chance to memorize his address. No one wanted a preteen. Once you were past the impressionable age, you were treated more as a guest in the house rather than part of the family. No one willingly took in older kids and teenagers because they wanted to. It was always for the money. At least, that was how Jungkook saw it.

He’d learned that out of all of the kids he ever lived with, he was the expendable one. The one that didn’t need attention. Didn’t need love because he could take care of himself. Over time, he’d learned to survive. To see his fake family as a provider of the bare necessities and nothing else. He’d learned to never grow attached. To never let anyone in. To never even unpack his things because any day now, his case worker was going to knock on the door and tell him it was time to move on.

It’s hard not to latch onto the bitterness and let it fester inside you. Especially when there’s such a lack of love in your life. Jungkook shut down, made a bubble around himself of anger and hatred. He’d get into it with his fake siblings, with his fake parents. With anyone that looked at him wrong. He got into sports and started working out as a way to avoid home and clear his mind. He got bigger, more intimidating. People started leaving him alone.

Then in seventh grade, he saw a small boy get cornered by a group of guys much bigger than him. He didn’t even hesitate before getting right in the middle of it, blocking the boy with his body and staring them down until they backed off. That was the day he met Jimin. The day he figured out that his strength could in fact be put to good use. Jimin introduced him to Tae and it didn’t take long for the two to break down his walls. To show him that there were in fact people in this world that cared about him. That he could care about too.

When he met the rest of the guys, he found himself feeling angry less often. Smiling more. Laughing even. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed so much. They were his escape from the real world. The ones that kept him going. That kept him sane. He wanted to protect them with everything he had. Protect Jimin from the darkness that enshrouded him at school.

*

“Out!”

“Fine!”

Jungkook slammed the front door to his house behind him and slung his backpack over his shoulder. His ears burned under the hood of his sweatshirt and hot tears glazed his eyes, threatening to spill over the moment he blinked. It seemed like more and more this was the way he’d leave. With a shouting match between he and his fake dad and then a slam of the door.

Jimin’s mom’s car idled on the curb, Jimin sitting in the passenger seat, his eyes following Jungkook as he trudged toward them.

“Morning, Jungkook,” Jimin’s mom said when Jungkook slid into the backseat.

“Morning,” he uttered and sniffed hard to keep the tears from spilling over. When his eyes were finally dry, he looked up, catching Jimin staring in the rear view mirror. The older boy’s forehead was creased, the corners of his eyes dipped low with concern. Jungkook turned his head, tearing his gaze from his friend’s and watched the houses rush by through the window. Then he felt his phone buzz in his pocket and he pulled it out.

Jimin: fake dad?

Jungkook glanced up again to see that Jimin’s eyes were still trained on him through the mirror. With a sigh, he looked back down at his screen, his fingers typing out an answer.

JK: yea. im fine tho.

Jimin: ok

It was obvious Jimin didn’t believe him but Jungkook was an impenetrable fortress that chose when to let people in and when to keep them locked out. He didn’t like talking about his home life, especially to Jimin. The boy had enough to worry about with school and Jiho and therapy. The last thing he needed was to be triggered by Jungkook and his miserable situation. Jimin had always been an empathetic soul, though. And maybe that was why Jungkook had been drawn to him from the start. Jungkook was comfortable around him. He felt understood even though Jimin knew very little. The only other person in the group he’d opened up to was Yoongi.

Yoongi.

The older boy had been like a big brother to him. Like a father. A protector. A home. His words still resonated in Jungkook’s head, bouncing around in his skull like a ricocheting bullet. I don’t want you anymore. He never thought he’d hear that from Yoongi. His fake dad had drilled it into him that he wasn’t actually wanted. That they only took in a fourteen year old with a temper because they knew he’d be easier to manage than their younger wards. And money was money. As long as they kept him fed and clothed, they would receive a check every month. He expected that from them. But not Yoongi. Never Yoongi.

He hadn’t believed he’d heard his hyung right at first. That, for some reason, his ears had interpreted what the boy had said incorrectly. That maybe his mind had been playing tricks on him. But then the words hit him like a sledgehammer to the chest, bruising his ribcage and crushing his lungs. They’d left him breathless.

You don’t want me anymore? He’d had to be sure. Yoongi couldn’t have said it. Couldn’t have meant to say something that he knew would cause so much damage to the younger boy. That would leave him feeling so broken. So worthless. You heard me. And he had. And he heard him for weeks after that. Those words. Those words that pierced him to the core. That extinguished his spirit and left him groping around in darkness.

I don’t want you anymore.

Leaving Yoongi’s house that night, he’d wandered the streets for a while, his anger and hurt slowly fading to numbness. And now he only ever felt one of the two. When he was angry he wanted to punch something or someone and when he was numb, he wanted to feel pain. Just needed to feel something.

He lashed out even more at his foster parents. At the other kids in the house. At his teachers and students at school. He got in a lot of fights. Provoked classmates and rough looking strangers on the streets. He was lucky no one ever pulled a knife or a gun on him. Though maybe he secretly hoped someone would.

*

“Why don’t you stay at my house tonight?” Jimin asked once they’d gotten to school and his mom’s car had pulled away from the curb. “Friday night’s pizza night.”

“You know I can’t turn down pizza night,” Jungkook replied, the corner of his mouth twitching up into a small smirk. Just the prospect of not having to go back to his fake family after school was enough to lighten his mood a bit. Just a bit, though. Yoongi’s words still dragged him down into the icy depths of a dark ocean, but the thought of staying at Jimin’s house at least gave him a chance to break the surface and take in a breath before being pulled back down again.

School had never really been a problem for Jungkook. He’d always stayed pretty much in the middle academically. Never getting straight A’s but never getting below a C. It kept his fake parents and the teachers off his back which was all that mattered to him. Though now with Taehyung no longer at school as he awaited his trial, Jungkook was having to rush from his classes that he didn’t share with Jimin to meet the boy, sometimes forgetting to turn in his homework or stopping by his locker to grab his books for his next class. He was starting to fall a bit behind and his grades were reflecting it.

Jiho had left them pretty much alone for a while now. Sure, Jungkook saw him in the halls and sometimes would catch him just looking at Jimin but it seemed like making Jimin miserable was no longer on his agenda. Maybe he’d finally gotten bored of tormenting him. Though Jungkook wasn’t stupid enough to let his guard down, even for a second.

*

“I’m sorry I forgot Tae’s homework,” Jimin said as he walked quickly down the hall toward his locker. He’d been bringing work to Taehyung so the boy would still be able to graduate on time. “I don’t know why I didn’t grab it before class. I guess I was just in such a rush. It was stupid.”

“It’s fine, Jiminie,” Jungkook said. He almost had to jog to keep up. The boy was so much smaller than him, how was he covering so much ground so quickly?

“I’ve just been stressed out ever since Tae got arrested and all that crap and now you’re having to work twice as hard and I just—” he stopped in front of his locker, hand hovering over the combination dial. He squeezed his eyes shut with a sigh then looked up at Jungkook. “I’m sorry I’m so weak, Jungkook-ah.”

Jungkook sucked in a breath, words of assurance at the back of his throat when he heard a locker slam a bit further down the hall. He and Jimin turned to find Jiho, by himself, coming toward them. Where were his friends?

“So the rumors are true, then,” Jiho said, his dark eyes sparkling as he leaned against the locker next to Jungkook. “Your other guard dog got sent to the pound.”

Jungkook was in Jiho’s face in a second, teeth bared. “Don’t talk about Tae like that,” he growled.

The bully’s eyes widened in fear for just a second before narrowing to slits, a devilish grin pulling his mouth upward. “Or what?” he asked quietly. “You can’t touch me. Not here anyway.”

“Wanna bet?” Jungkook asked, stepping forward again, forcing Jiho to back up against the locker.

Jiho let out a dark chuckle. “You want to hit me so bad right now, don’t you, Pitt-bull?”

He had no idea.

Jungkook could feel the muscle in his arm tightening and contracting with each clench of his fist. He wanted so badly to slam his knuckles against Jiho’s skull. Make him think twice before ever even looking Jimin’s way again. He was so sick of seeing the fear, the exhaustion, the misery in Jimin’s eyes every day when he’d come to school. Even though graduation was less than two months away, it still wasn’t close enough. Jungkook didn’t know if Jimin was going to make it. He already looked skinnier than he had even just a month ago. Much longer and he’d wither away to nothing. Disappear completely. All because of this worthless piece of trash grinning up at Jungkook. He’d been feeling so cold, so empty since Yoongi had abandoned him. But now fire built in his gut. Flames licked up his chest. Burned his throat and set his eyes ablaze. If there was one thing he knew how to do, it was protect his friends. And this worm was still threatening one of them.

He’d had enough.

“Come on, Jungkook,” Jiho uttered so only he could hear. “There aren’t any teachers around. Hit me.”

Jungkook felt a cold hand on his arm, fingers curling around his bicep. “Jungkook-ah.” Jimin’s small voice was barely audible over the sound of Jungkook’s heart crashing in his ears. “Come on. He’s not worth it.”

Jungkook turned his head to look at his friend. At his tired face. At his pallid skin. His hollowed cheeks. The boy looked like he hadn’t felt happiness in years, yet somehow he still managed to greet him every morning with a smile. How was this boy still alive?

“You’re right, Jimin,” Jungkook said and glanced back at Jiho. “He’s not worth it.” Then he turned to meet his friend’s eyes again. “But you are.”

Before Jimin could stop him, Jungkook reared back and threw his fist forward. It connected with a sickening crack against Jiho’s cheekbone, sending the boy crashing to the ground on his hands and knees. A thick stream of bloody saliva dripped from his mouth and he spit onto the linoleum floor before looking back up to meet Jungkook’s eyes. His face split in a wide, red stained grin.

“Jungkook, what did you do?” Jimin whispered from behind him.

When he turned to look at him, Jungkook’s eyes caught on someone over his shoulder. Principal Song approached with two of Jiho’s friends trailing behind him.

He’d been set up. Of course Jiho and his friends had planned this. Anything to get Jimin’s second guard dog in trouble and out of the picture.

“What on earth is going on here?” Principal Song asked, his face red with anger.

Jiho’s friends rushed forward to help the injured boy up and he stumbled a bit, playing up that he was really hurt. And he probably was. Jungkook had hit him pretty hard.

“He just hit me, Principal Song-nim,” Jiho said weakly. “Just straight up punched me in the face.”

“Don’t even pretend you didn’t provoke him, Jiho,” Jimin snapped from behind Jungkook then looked at the principal. “He was just defending me.”

“Jungkook,” Principal Song barked.

Jungkook hadn’t said a word or moved a muscle since first seeing the man coming toward him. The fire in his gut raged on, leaving his shoulders heaving and his heart pounding. His eyes drilled into the man as his fists clenched tighter. He could feel where the skin on one of his knuckles had split when it came in contact with Jiho’s face.

Jiho. He wanted to make the boy suffer as much as he’d made Jimin suffer since middle school. He wanted to make him wish he’d never said a word to Jimin. Never laid hands on him. Jungkook wanted to kill him.

“Did you hit this student?” the principal asked gesturing toward the cowering Jiho.

Finally, Jungkook pulled in a steady breath to speak. “Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because he told me to.”

Principal Song opened his mouth but nothing came out. He obviously hadn’t expected to hear that answer and now he flapped his mouth a few more times like a fish, his eyes darting back and forth between the injured boy and the one that had injured him. At last, he gathered his thoughts. “We have a strict no violence policy here. You were all made well aware of that at the beginning of the year. Did you forget?”

Jungkook clenched his jaw. “No,” he said through gritted teeth.

“So what made you do it?”

“He’s been harassing Jimin since sixth grade.” Jungkook said coldly. “Where’ve you been?”

Again, the principal was stricken speechless. It took him just a few seconds to regain his composure. “You not liking the way we do things does not justify taking matters into your own hands.” Then Principal Song turned to Jiho and his friends. “Please escort Jiho to the nurse and then all of you get to class.” He waited as they made their way down the hall and disappeared around the corner. Then he turned to Jungkook. “You know the rules, young man. You’ll need to come with me. Back to class, Jimin.”

Jungkook watched a look of horror pass over Jimin’s face as the principal took Jungkook by the shoulder and led him away. He craned his neck around, keeping his eyes locked on Jimin’s until they turned the corner. Dread filled his own stomach. If he was suspended, how would he be able to protect Jimin? He turned his head to look back at the principal.

“Principal Song-Nim, you can’t suspend me. Jimin can’t—”

“The staff will do whatever we can to keep our students safe,” the man replied sternly. “He will be fine without you.”

That was it. Jungkook ripped his shoulder out of the principal’s hand and turned to face him. The boy was eye level with the man but more muscular and he couldn’t help but feel a flash of cruel satisfaction when Principal Song took a slight step backward.

“This school has done nothing to make Jimin feel safe,” Jungkook growled. “Something is going to happen to him while I’m gone. Just watch. And when it does, I’m not going after Jiho and his lackeys. I’m coming after you.”

Principal Song’s eyes narrowed to shining black slits. “That sounded like a threat, Jeon Jungkook,” he said. “And threats will not be tolerated at this school.” Then he straightened up, standing eye to eye once again with the boy. “You’re no longer suspended.”

“Wai—”

“You’re expelled.”

Jungkook could feel the anger churning in his belly like an ocean in a hurricane. His fists clenched at his sides and his jaw became prominent as he ground his teeth together.

“Now, if you don’t want the police to get involved, I suggest getting off school grounds immediately.”

Jungkook watched out of the tops of his eyes as the man turned and strolled away and into his office. The whole inner wall was glass so Jungkook could see him go all the way across the room to sit at his oak desk. When the principal was finally seated, he looked up, locking eyes with Jungkook before reaching slowly for the phone. Obviously, he’d been serious when he said he’d call the police on Jungkook if he didn’t leave right then. What else could Jungkook do but go? He couldn’t go back to tell Jimin what happened. He couldn’t return the next week to walk him to his classes. It was over.

With a defeated sigh, his angry expression fell and his eyes slid from the principal’s down to the floor as he trudged toward the exit. What was he going to tell Jimin?

*

Jungkook waited at the bus stop across the street from the school until the students were let out at the end of the day. He couldn’t risk being caught on the property and getting the cops called on him, so when he finally saw Jimin coming out the front doors, he jumped to his feet and waited anxiously there on the other side of the crosswalk like a dog at the end of his leash. His eyes followed the boy closely, never straying as Jimin pulled his hood up over his faded orange hair. He watched him make his way across the street, his hands jammed deep into the pocket of his hoodie. Watched him glance his way before shaking his head and trudging past him down the sidewalk.

Jungkook knew he looked ridiculous trailing after the boy like a puppy but he couldn’t help it. He needed to apologize. Needed to explain. Needed Jimin to stop ignoring him. Please, just stop ignoring him.

“Jiminie, just stop for a second. Please,” Jungkook finally said, grabbing the smaller boy’s arm and spinning him around to face him.

“Why did you hit him, Jungkook?” Jimin asked. He set his jaw in a hard line, his eyes drilling into Jungkook’s and for the first time, Jungkook actually felt intimidated by his icy stare. “Well?”

With a sigh, Jungkook looked back at the school again. It was several blocks away now. Jimin had gone pretty far before Jungkook caught up to him. “I just need to tell you something…”

“Yes, please do, Jungkook,” Jimin said. “Tell me exactly what you were thinking. Tell me why you thought it would be a good idea to punch Jiho at school when you know that they’ve been cracking down on their whole no violence policy, which is a load of crap, by the way, since apparently Jiho doesn’t even need to touch me to mess with me every day. And now, you’ve gone and gotten yourself suspended so what—”

“Expelled.”

Jimin went silent.

Jungkook didn’t want to meet his eyes. He kicked at a clump of moss sticking up from between a crack in the sidewalk. Stuffed his hands in his pockets and grabbed at the lint that had collected in the seams. Rolled his tongue against his cheek. Until finally, the silence was too heavy to bear and he had to look up.

Jimin’s icy facade had melted, leaving a stricken expression on his pale face. His lips were slightly parted, his shoulders heaving and then his fingers flew up into his hair and panic filled his eyes. “Y-you what?”

Immediately, Jungkook wished he could take everything back. Wished he hadn’t let Jiho’s comment about Taehyung get to him. Wished he’d controlled the fire raging in him. Wished he’d fought the urge to hit him. Wished he hadn’t just uttered the one word that could make his friend suddenly look so scared.

Jimin’s breathing turned ragged and he raked his quivering hands down his face. “Expelled?” he cracked. “You got expelled? I won’t have you? I won’t have Tae? Jiho will…” He staggered, almost crashing into the bushes lining the sidewalk if not for Jungkook reaching out and grabbing him. The boy’s skin felt clammy, his whole body trembling. Jungkook had seen his friend have plenty of anxiety attacks but this was completely different. A panic attack worse than any he’d ever had.

“It’ll be okay, Jiminie,” Jungkook whispered as he sank down onto the curb, enveloping the boy in his arms, letting him crumble into his chest as he descended further into panic. “I’ll figure it out. You won’t be alone. It’ll be okay.” Jungkook knew he was making empty promises. He wasn’t allowed back on school property. Tae wasn’t going back to school, at the very least, until after his trial and that was only if he was found not guilty. And even then, school would be over anyway. Jimin was right. He was all alone. And it was Jungkook’s fault.

*

It had been almost eight years since he lost his parents and the memories, the details, had faded over time. But sometimes, out of nowhere, his mom or dad’s face would appear in his mind with startling detail, leaving him breathless.

This time it was a dream that they appeared to him in. More of a nightmare, really. He could see the crash happening. Hear the collision. The jarring sound of tires squealing, brakes seizing, glass and metal crumpling. He saw his mom’s terror-filled eyes and heard her scream his name. And then he woke up.

It took him a second to realize he was laying on the floor in Jimin’s room instead of sprawling across the backseat of a car. A layer of cold sweat coated his naked torso and matted his hair down to his forehead.

He heard a groan just then and watched as Jimin’s arm stirred where it lay slung over the edge of his mattress. “Jungkook-ah?”

“I’m fine,” Jungkook said sitting up and pressing his palms into his eyes. “Just had a nightmare, Jiminie. Go back to sleep.”

With another barely-awake groan, Jimin rolled over to face the wall. Jungkook peered at him from over the edge of the bed. The boy’s blankets had slipped off of him in the night and now he lay curled into a ball, his cotton pants riding up his legs to expose his boney ankles. He was so small. Too small.

Jungkook got up quietly and tugged Jimin’s blanket back in place over his body. The boy nuzzled his pillow, never opening his eyes but letting out a contented sigh. At least he seemed to be having good dreams. With a sharp breath to clear his head, Jungkook reached for his shirt and tugged it on then grabbed his hoodie and slipped from the room quietly.

The whole house was dark and silent, the place awash in cold, blue light cast by the streetlamp that filtered in through the filmy curtains covering the windows. Jimin’s house was nice. Not super nice like Jin’s, but homey, comfortable. Jungkook felt a stab of jealousy in his gut as he made his way to the entryway where his shoes were. He passed walls lined with photos of Jimin in different stages of growing up. Family photos and birthday photos and school photos. Jungkook hadn’t lived in a house where his picture adorned a wall in a long time. Having been shuffled from one place to the next so many times had made him forget what it was even like to have a place to call his. Sure, he’d been with his current caretakers for a few years now but he’d never go so far as to call those people his family or that house his home.

After pulling his shoes on, Jungkook unlocked and opened the front door quietly. It was unusually warm for a spring night but Jungkook welcomed the feeling of the wind on his face. He’d woken up with goosebumps dotting his skin and this was the comfort he needed to wash away the image of his mom’s terror-filled eyes.

He often went for walks when he needed to clear his head. So much had happened that day that this walk was necessary. Heck, the past several months had been nothing but one hit after another. From Taehyung killing his dad to getting arrested, to Yoongi suddenly flipping out on Jin and tossing Jungkook out like a piece of trash. Jungkook sucked in a sharp breath at that last thought.

He’d made it to the end of Jimin’s street, past the mini mart and out onto the main road that ran through the city. He wasn’t sure where he was headed but it didn’t really matter anyway. He could go on forever and no one would miss him. He already was nothing but a burden on the people that knew him. And he’d let down the only one that didn’t see him as such.

After hearing the same words for the past eight years of his life, that he was only as good as the money he brought in, that he needed to stop relying on others to take care of him, that he needed to grow up and be a man, it was hard to not believe it was all true. And then there was Jimin. His best friend and the boy that relied on him more than anyone else. The boy that trusted him to keep him safe and he’d failed. Failed at his one responsibility.

Jungkook cut across the street and around a corner. The school loomed in front of him, its tall, white stone clocktower raising up to pierce the sky like a blade. Jungkook sat down on the bench he’d waited for Jimin on earlier in the day and rested his head in his hands.

That dream had really shaken him. Had brought everything back. And now the hole in his chest that had finally begun to shrink with time felt gaping again. Without any warning, his chest contracted and he let out a sob. Then the tears came.

He buried his face in his arms, crumpling into a ball there on the bench as he cried. His voice echoed down the street, filling the darkness with sounds of anguish. He didn’t know how long he cried but when he finally looked up again, his lungs hurt and his eyes burned.

Jungkook leaned back, resting his head against the back of the bench so he could look up at the sky. The city lights washed out most of the stars but the brightest ones were still visible. Shining and twinkling the way stars do, completely unaware or maybe uncaring of the trivial problems of humans. Stars have much bigger things to worry about.

With a heavy sigh Jungkook got up again. The air had cooled significantly since he left Jimin’s house and now he hunched his shoulders forward and shoved his hands deep into his pockets to brace himself against the chill. He was exhausted and only now did he regret leaving the house in the first place. It was going to be a long, cold walk back.

He didn’t even see the car flying down the road toward him. The driver apparently didn’t see him either because they didn’t even attempt to slow down before plowing into him. The whole thing happened so quickly that Jungkook didn’t know it until he landed on the road on his back with a sickening crunch. The impact ripped all of the air from his lungs and he lay there for several panicking seconds as he tried to will them to expand again. When he finally was able to pull in a breath, he knew something was wrong. He couldn’t inhale right. When he tried to move his legs, they wouldn’t budge. He couldn’t feel anything. Something was definitely wrong.

His heart pounded in his chest and he could hear how ragged and shallow his breathing was. His vision blurred with every beat. The air grew thick and suddenly he felt like he was drowning. Panic washed over him like a wave and his unfocused eyes watched as the surface grew more and more distant. He was sinking further. Falling into the dark depths of the unknown.

Please, no. Please, not here. Not like this.

Jungkook could feel himself being tugged further down and he grit his teeth, struggling against current. No matter how hard he struggled, he couldn’t fight it. He could feel his energy draining. Feel his heartbeat weakening. The sound of it slowing seemed to surround him until it was all he could hear. Until there was nothing but him, floating in this black ocean, listening to his dying pulse.

Please…not like this.

He thought of Jimin, sleeping peacefully in his bed. He thought of Tae who still constantly wore that haunted look on his face. Of Hoseok and how lifeless he’d become. Of Namjoon and how much he beat himself up over letting Tae down. Of Yoongi.

“Yoongi.”

The name left Jungkook’s lips in a cracked wheeze. His throat constricted and it took him several more seconds and too much energy to force the muscles to relax so he could breathe again.

What he wouldn’t give to see Yoongi again. He just wanted to hear his voice. Wanted to hear him assure him that everything would be okay. That he would get through this. That what happened with Jimin wasn’t his fault. Though he knew it was.

I don’t want to die alone.

A sob broke free of Jungkook’s throat and he took in another gasping breath before plunging below the surface of the dark ocean again. Memories of his life floated around him in the darkness. As if watching silent movies on a projector, his eyes roved over the familiar scenes. Of when he met Jimin, and the rest of the guys. When they had their first beach day. Of one of the many parties at Yoongi’s where Jungkook spent the whole time on the couch stuffed between Jimin and Tae while playing video games. Of the first time he went to Yoongi after his fake dad told him he was worthless. Yoongi pulling him in for a hug, his arms holding Jungkook’s broken pieces together. And finally, his eyes fell on a memory. A memory of him and his parents the night before his seventh birthday when the three of them were making cupcakes and he and his dad ended up getting into a frosting fight.

He focused on his parents’ faces. On the laugh lines creasing the corners of his mom’s eyes. On the gray flecks of scruff peppering his dad’s chin. These were the things he had forgotten over the years. The things that were so vivid and real to him now.

Suddenly the thought of dying didn’t terrify him anymore. Now, instead, Jungkook could only feel an undeniable sense of peace. He’d finally get to be with his parents. He’d finally have a family again. He was so close to the edge, he could feel it.

At last, he opened his eyes. The black sky stretched above him and through the blurry film of tears, he could still make out the stars. Now they didn’t seem like cold, uncaring orbs of light in the distance. They were much closer. So close he’d be able to reach out and brush them with his fingertips if he had the strength.

Kook-ah. What do you think you’re doing?

Jungkook blinked hard and sighed. “Yoongi-hyung?” he uttered, his words drawn out and slurred. He could feel himself fading fast.

Just hold on, Kook. Just keep fighting.

Jungkook’s heart rate plunged again, his thoughts suddenly foggy. It was getting harder to breathe. “I-I can’t…hyung.”

Do it for us, Kook. Please. Do it for Jimin.

“It’s…too…” Jungkook could feel himself drifting in and out of consciousness, “late…for Jimin.”

Bull.

A puff of air escaped his nose in a weak laugh. He couldn’t help feeling a twinge of sadness at the thought of leaving his friends behind. He felt the warmth of fresh tears spring to his eyes when he thought about the moments he’d shared with them. The parties, the jokes, the meals at the diner. He’d had nothing until he met them, and then they were his everything. He couldn’t leave without saying goodbye.

With his teeth gritted against the pain, Jungkook slid his arm along the pavement, scraping the exposed skin of his wrist across the ground as he reached for his pocket. His energy was draining fast and he knew he didn’t have much longer. By the time his fingers brushed the hem of his pocket, he was breathing hard. Just a little bit further. A choked sob fell from his lips when he realized his pocket was empty. His phone wasn’t there.

Exhausted, he let his head fall to the side, his fading vision landing on the cracked black device sitting next to him. He felt like he was going to cry with relief. His arm was too heavy to lift and for a few seconds he stared helplessly at his phone, the sound of his heartbeat slowing in his ears. But then he pulled in a breath.

“Hey Siri,” he wheezed and then waited with bated breath until at last, the screen of his phone came to life and his mouth nudged up into a weak, triumphant smile. “Call…” Who could he call? “Call Seokjin,” he finally said. As the screen changed, he waited, closing his eyes and letting the sound of the ringing fill his head. It took four agonizing rings before Jungkook heard the sound of someone answering.

“Hello?”

Jungkook’s face crumpled at the sound of the familiar voice and he couldn’t bring himself to speak.

“Hello?” Jin’s voice echoed again. “Jungkook-ah?”

Jungkook sucked in as deep of a breath as he could. “Hyung?” he cracked.

“Jungkook-ah? Do you know what time it is? Are you okay?”

Jungkook opened his mouth to respond but instead, a sob pushed its way out.

“Jungkook? What happened? What’s wrong?” The older boy’s voice rose with panic.

“I tried, hyung” he whispered letting his cheek fall to the pavement. He squeezed his eyes shut as another cry tumbled out. “I failed. I failed Jimin…”

“You what? Jungkook, where are you? What happened?”

“I failed Yoongi-hyung…”

On the other end of the line, Jungkook could hear faint rustling sounds as Jin got out of bed and started fumbling around in his room. “Just stay on the line with me. Where are you?”

Jungkook took in a wheezing breath as his surroundings began to fade. He tried to keep his eyes focused on the glowing screen of his phone where it lay close to his head. He couldn’t feel his body anymore. He couldn’t feel the cold air, or the rumbling pavement. He couldn’t hear the sirens in the distance or the fact that they were growing closer.

“Just tell the guys I love them. Tell them I’m sorry,” he whispered as the tears slipped past his eyelashes and slid down his cheek.

“Jungkook, stop,” Jin cracked. “Don’t talk like that. Just tell me where you are.”

Jungkook tried to open his mouth again, tried to draw in another breath but he was too tired. Too far gone. Instead, he closed his eyes, listening to Jin go on, his voice distorting as he yelled into the receiver. At least he wasn’t alone anymore.

[kettlewrites]

private school!jaemin

*mark’s voice* let’s get it 

oh before we get it,, dedicated to my true love @heartmins i love u bb<3 

[also it’s longer than i expected so there’s a keep reading]

okay so,,, we’ll call the school Season High ,, like Czennies woot okay so Season High is a pretty well known as it’s one of the biggest private schools in the middle of Seoul

a ton of millionaire kids attend it,,, but how did you get there? last time you checked, you weren’t a big millionaire bathing in money

so you happened to have a dead beat dad who left you when you were younger,,, but would only contact you to give you money for your schooling

you hated him for it, but your mother tried to convince you that it was for the better

either way,, you were attending the top private school.

you weren’t that popular,, as most would think,,,

the bratty girls would tear you to shreds, physically and mentally

ever since you stepped foot into that school,, your life had been a living hell because of those girls

they would call you names, pull your hair and even rip your homework to shreds

but you couldn’t do anything about it because you knew that they could ruin your life completely with a snap of their rich little fingers

throughout the years you lost your happiness,, you were only there just to graduate at this point

which is why you let out a sigh of relief when you realized that senior year was finally here

you were sitting in your new homeroom class, staring out the window as you waited for class to start

a familiar snicker entered your ear causing you to turn your head, it was her

rachel, don’t ask why i knew a mean rachel >:( was standing at the other side of the room with her group of friends just staring at you

“i guess it’ll be one last year together isn’t that right y/n?” she smiles before taking her seat

a groan bounced off your chest before you turned back to look out the window

noticing a group of guys in the courtyard, laughing and playing with each other

you hadn’t seen half of them before,, actually you hadn’t seen all but one before today

perhaps they were transfers from another town or school

this,, is where jaemin comes in

jaemin was apart of the group of guys

he was celebrating with his friends that they were finally in their senior year,, donghyuck and renjun being transfers from different towns as jeno was just coming back from studying abroad to graduate with with his best friend

“senior year~” renjun sighs as they walked into the prestigious building, “i never thought i’d see the day.”

“is your crush in your homeroom again?” hyuck teases

jaemin laughs,, which causes all the underclassmen girls to swoon at their lockers

did i mention that jaemin had everyone wrapped around his dainty finger?

he wasn’t apart of any stuck up, rich kid clique,, it was more because of his handsome aura and kindness to everything/one

the kid could smile and everyone’s world lights up

he literally makes the ugly school uniform look like something that came off the runway

sadly,, the boys were separated in homerooms so jaemin walked to his alone

he was in your homeroom, cliche isn’t it?

not really,, remember how you only knew one boy out of the group,, because you knew jaemin

he had been in your homeroom every year,, and you were actually thankful for it

because even if you didn’t have many friends,, nor a good standing with the people in the school

jaemin was still the nicest to you,, which at first you didn’t understand why because what did he gain from it?

in his eyes he gains the world,, and one of the greatest friends ever

as soon as he enters the room,, he spots you at the back of the room

HIS ENTIRE WORLD LIGHTS UP

because like how he makes underclassmen swoon,, you make him completely melt

that crush hyuck was talking about? oh yeah,, that was you

maybe it developed in freshman year when you two first met on the staircase

where he found you crying after rachel poured milk on you during lunch

where he sat there,, and skipped two class periods just to comfort you even though you two just met

or maybe it was during maths,, when he was obviously struggling and you offered to help him because you felt like you owed him after he comforted you

and he thought you were an angel sent from heaven,, as you bit onto your pencil trying to figure out a way to explain how the concept worked

or was it sophomore year?

when you two had biology together,, and you would always skip every other week just to sit in the courtyard and eat five boxes of pocky and talk about the meaning of life

possibly it could’ve been junior year,, when you stepped out of your comfort zone (mainly cause your mom made you lets be completely real) and went to the junior prom,,

and there you were,, looking incredible and jaemin spent the entire night with you

with stars in his eyes and his heart on a treadmill

well whenever it was,, jaemin knew he had a H U G E crush on you

okay,, so he takes the seat right next to you and slams his hand on your desk

“good morning!”

it earns a jump from you,, and you were about to curse at him but the teacher walks in

so,, after receiving your schedule you realized that you had almost every class with jaems

which jaemin is ecstatic about,, like out of the roof

but lunch comes around ,, and you go to your usual area which is just hanging around in the library and eat your sandwich or something while using one of the computers for an hour

and jaemin is just being a giddy, happy pup while eating lunch with the boys

they all have at least two classes together,, except for renjun who sadly only one class with jeno but at least he has the same lunch with everyone right? 

so,,, flash forward ~

it’s maybe two months into the school year

you’ve basically been spending your schooldays with jaemin,, and finally a week ago you started having lunch with the boys

finally,,, you had friends

you and jaemin were still,, great friends but you noticed that you had been viewing him differently this year

maybe it was a few weeks ago,, but you started thinking about him constantly

his breathtaking smile,, his amazing laugh,, or the way his eyes constantly had a twinkle in them

and you,,, were sitting in BC Calculus and when you looked over to jaemin that’s when you feel your heart flip in your chest for the first time

now it happens at least ten times a day,, and you’re going completely insane

but you know who was going just as insane as you were?

na jaemin

because ,,, homecoming was coming up and he had no idea how to ask you,,, bc he decided that this was the year he needed to grow the balls to just ask you out finally

he wrote out so many ideas down before getting to the perfect idea

something that would win you over,,, right?

let’s just hope

and the time had come,, and jaemin was already running in circles because the worse thing that could ever happen,,, happened

it was pouring down,, and his plan was suppose to happen outside in the courtyard,, where the friendship had firstly blossomed

but who cared,, because he still asked you to meet him in the courtyard during lunch

“are you being serious? jaemin it’s pouring outside.”

“y/n please,, it’s really important.”

you were in a dilemma too because you just couldn’t say no so you agreed to meet him out there even if you had a chance of being struck by lightening

the clock was ticking down,, jaemin had skipped english and was scrambling around the school to get the stuff ready

when the bell rang, you made your way down to the courtyard cursing under your breath as the rain pelted down onto you

and there he was,, just standing there completely drenched with a giant smile that you could see from a mile away

you couldn’t help laughing when you were standing face to face with him

“so what was so important for you to drag me out here na jaemin?”

“i wanted to ask you something.” he was internally screaming

you raised an eyebrow, even though he probably couldn’t see it and took a step closer to him

his hand goes to grab yours, he dry swallows before going to say what was on his mind

“ᶦ ʳᵉᵃˡˡʸ ˡᶦᵏᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᵃⁿᵈ ᶦ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ᶠᵒʳ ʸᵉᵃʳˢ ⁿᵒʷ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵒʰ ᵐʸ ᵍᵒᵈ ʸᵒᵘʳ ˢᵐᶦˡᵉ ᵐᵃᵏᵉˢ ᵐᵉ ʷᵃⁿᵗ ᵗᵒ ᵗʰʳᵒʷ ᵐʸˢᵉˡᶠ ᵒᶠᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ʳᵒᵒᶠ ᵇᵘᵗ ʰᵉʸ ᶦ ʳᵉᵃˡˡʸ ˡᶦᵏᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᵃⁿᵈ ᶦᵗ ʷᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵐᵉᵃⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ʷᵒʳˡᵈ ᵗᵒ ᵐᵉ ᶦᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ʷᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵍᵒ ᵗᵒ ʰᵒᵐᵉᶜᵒᵐᶦⁿᵍ ʷᶦᵗʰ ᵐᵉ“ 

“i can’t hear you over the rain jaems.” you shout, “what did you say?”

“I REALLY LIKE YOU PLEASE CAN YOU JUST GO TO HOMECOMING WITH ME.” he shouts, startling you

your eyes widen but instantly a smile grows on your face, “you like me?”

he nods, his cheeks grow hot and flush a bright red but it was too dark outside to even notice

“thank god.” you finally say after processing your emotions, “thank fucking god because i really like you too.”

so yeah, you two end up going to homecoming together

and at the end of the night,, even though you both didn’t make it official official,, everyone accepted you two as a couple,, you and jaems did too

but now here you two were,, standing outside of your house at midnight

the stars were shining and he was holding your head gently

you turned to go inside but jaemin pulls you back and for a second he just stares before looking at your lips

“can i kiss you?” he asks softly, his cheeks flushing a soft tint of pink

“of course you—“

and that’s when it happens. his lips were pressed against yours, moving ever so softly as you two stood your door lamp. something about it was magical, maybe because you had daydreamed about this since you two confessed to each other. you didn’t want it to stop,, but you two needed to breathe

and yeah,, i honestly don’t know how to end this so yeah this is how i’m gonna end this. whoops sorry it’s literally trash ;; i thought i was out of my rut but apparently im not :[ maybe i’ll delete this,, but who knows

[starrywriting]

favorite boy

billy hargrove

spotify link  youtube link

summary: billy wants you to care for him, love him. he wants to be yours and vice versa… but he also wants to break your heart. (lowkey based off of ‘best friend’ by rex orange county) linked above ^

disclaimer: me writing this is not me excusing is abusive, racist and impulsive behavior.

warnings: swear words, implied sex

an: my friend introduced me to rex orange county and im in love!! i am working on requests and part two or starstruck, it just takes a bit because i write out the plot for each of my imagines before i start. Send me some of your fave songs! I need more music to listen to! Or send me a song and a character! (tbh im not sure im happy with this imagine lol)

words: 2.4k

Your name: submit What is this?

You had met her on Monday. It was raining and you saw her skating past you. Her red hair looked like a fire losing its rage in the rain, her face was pale, her nose was cold. You told yourself to be kind to everyone, so you pulled over and stepped out of your car, umbrella in hand to cover yourself from the rain, “Hey! Do you need a ride? It’s freezing out!” You called out, hoping your voice wasn’t getting drowned out by the rain and wind.

Her head whipped around, watching you carefully. You could see the hesitation, and it almost seemed like she was a deer in the headlights… she looked afraid, but of what? “Uh... No.” Was all she called back to you, causing you to frown. You could see the obvious chatter in her teeth. Her fingers were red and her clothes were dripping.

You quickly ran out towards her, hoping she wouldn’t skate away before you got to her, she didn’t. “Take it..” You breathed out, extending your umbrella. The cold air around you causing your bones to shiver. She hesitated again, her hand reaching for the umbrella. She wrapped her hand around it, sending you a small smile. You nodded happily, quickly taking off your leather coat and placing it on her shoulders. You could see the protests in her eyes, and her lip was quivering.

“I can’t take this. You’ll be cold! The umbrella is enough!” She tried, extending your coat back towards you, but you took a step back, pushing her hand back towards her.

“I have a car, I’ll be okay.” You smiled, taking a few steps backward before you turned around and ran back towards your car. You stayed parked on the side of the road until you saw the girl skate off, and you followed suit in your car. Your music playing lightly as you drove and pulled into the parking lot of the school.

You found it quite comedic to watch all the girl and boys scurry towards the school, trying to get away from the rain. It was just water, after all, it would dry off. You had a theory that the girls and boys at school were all witches and warlocks, so if they got water on them, they would melt. It made sense since everyone but yourself seemed to have a wicked side.

Max carried her bag in her arms, placing the umbrella inside along with her homework and books. She was still wearing your coat, she liked it. It was warm and made her look badass. She had no idea who you were, but she thought you were pretty. It had been a while since she met someone kind, so meeting you brightened her day, even if it was raining throughout most of it. “Where’d you get that?” Billy questioned, pulling Max towards him by the cuff of the leather.

“From this girl..” Max mumbled, trying to pull away from him as he scowled out into the crowd of kids in the parking lot. It wasn’t raining anymore, thank the gods. Billy hated the rain. It ruined his vibe, and most importantly, his hair. He also thought the rain made the girls at school look like dead, cold cats rather than their already hideous cow look he saw every day while he walked down the halls.

“What girl? Was she pretty?” Billy joked, a smirk growing on his face as he shoved her away from him.

“Yeah actually, she was!” Max called out annoyed, opening the car door, “She’s the girl with ripped jeans, red chucks, and a bun!” Max continued, flicking Billy off before she shut the car door with a slam, slumping against the car door as she scowled at the glove compartment.

“What the fuck…?” Billy growled under his breath, watching you carefully with an almost dead cigarette in his mouth. Billy knew you, surely. Everyone knew you. You were the definition of high school popularity. Your title was higher than Queen. You were Billy’s ‘competition’, at least he thought you were. You were popular, pretty, kind and smart. You had everything going.

Everyone knew who you were. Your popularity was undeniable, but you were as humble and sweet as anyone else. You weren’t sure why so many people saw you as ‘popular’. You saw that as an empty label, but with so many people pegging you as so, you just started to continue with your life and ignore it. You were always kind to everyone, making sure to not let the others words bend your personality. That was something that bugged Billy so much so that his eyes narrowed every time he saw you. He was jealous.

“Hey! (y/l/n)!” Billy called out, a new cigarette in his mouth as he jogged towards you with a set jaw. You opened your car door, placing your backpack on the passenger seat before you turned towards him, leaning against the car.

“Hargrove.” You nodded, watching him carefully. He was really the only person that grinded your gears. His personality was too conflicting with yours. He was too stubborn, and he thought too much with his fist and dick rather than his head; that made you cringe.

“Who the hell do you think you are? Don’t talk to Max, ever.” He hissed, his nostrils flaring as he held the cigarette between his fingers.

“You mean your sister?” You smirked, keeping your cool as you walked towards him, “She’s cool,” you shrugged, grabbing his wrist, “I think I might just keep talking to her..” You smiled, a glint catching in your eye when you noticed how his eyes kept falling on your face and then down to your hand on his wrist. You used your free hand to pick the cigarette out from between his fingers, dropping it to the ground, you stubbed it out with the bottom of your chucks. “No smoking in school, bud.” You winked, patting his chest with your palm before you let go of him, opening your car door and turning on the ignition.

He was beyond furious when he walked back to his car, his voice echoed in the car and his music blared, almost popping the speakers. His voice was hoarse from the yelling. Max should have been scared, she should have flinched multiple times at his voice getting progressively louder, but instead, her head was leaned against the glass of the window, and a smirk was on her lips as she remembered just how speechless Billy was at the sight of you.

He slammed his bedroom door, making sure he put a chair under the doorknob. He didn’t know why his blood was boiling so much. He didn’t know why his heart was racing so much, and he specifically didn’t know why a low fuzzy feeling was settling into his body.

He growled, looking at his reflection. His eyes were dilated and his veins were prominent in his arms. He was tense, no doubt about it, so he did the logical thing. He hopped out his window, car keys in hand, drove off, his car ending up at the front of the house of Tina, the girl who had eyed him since his first day. Maybe he could get you off his mind if he saw her.

She was quick to open the window for him, and he was quick to get to what he came for. Moans and groans filled the room and he could feel his shoulders relax. He needed a distraction, and a girl like Tina was the perfect distraction by the way she threw herself at him. Everything about the sex was great, he was pleased, and she was sure to pay close attention to his pleasure more than her own, but with every groan and moan that fell from his lips, all he could think about was you. He wanted you. He wanted you in any and every way he could have you. Your name was on the tip of his tongue, and he was more than ready to say it out loud in the same way he was groaning Tina’s name.

The next week, Billy was quick to notice the change in Max’s behavior towards him. She wasn’t afraid, she wasn’t ashamed, and she was always late. Almost as if she knew someone would be waiting for her if he ended up leaving her. He knew who that someone was, so instead of letting Max flee towards you, he stayed late and waited for her. He slowly started feeling like a lapdog. Following your every move when you weren’t looking, waiting for you to make a move so he could follow suit. He felt pathetic. He was entranced in your smiles and giggles that he heard from afar in the halls.

He was wrapped around your finger. He wanted you. He wanted to be yours and he wanted to be able to walk up to you and kiss you until the only word you knew was “More”. But something in the back of his mind made him want to see you cry. He wanted to break your heart for making him look pathetic and weak. He wanted revenge.

It wasn’t until you walked into school one day, your head hung low, that he felt his gaze stay on you until you turned to corner, and even then, he started following you. His steps were quiet behind yours, and he made sure to keep a distance so you wouldn’t hear him. Your body was hidden in a big, knitted sweater and tight, black jeans. Your demeanor seemed tired, and every time someone would come up to you, you would brush past them without even acknowledging a single word they called out towards you.

Billy was smirking, crossing his fingers in hopes that the reason why you were so glum was because you were finally going to give up and let him become superior. 

Once you had turned right into an empty, Billy happily called out to you, “(y/n).. baby..” He teased, his tongue flicking out to lick his lips before getting caught between his teeth. “Babygirl…” He grinned, walking faster to catch up to you.

He reached out, his hand grabbing your wrist, pulling you back, “Cat got your tong-“ He started, his smirk falling immediately when he saw your tear-stained cheeks and puffy eyes. His lips parted in surprise and without any hesitation, he pressed you into his chest, wrapping his arms you as you cried. He wasn’t sure what had happened, he was supposed to hate you, he was supposed to laugh at your vulnerability but instead, he was in the middle of an empty hallway, already 20 minutes late to first period, not that it really mattered to him, with the girl that was meant to be his enemy. He was supposed to make you his and break your heart afterward, but now that you were crying in his arms to the point where you shook with sadness and choked on your tears, made him realize that he was insane. He was insane for wanting to hurt something as beautiful and bright as you. It was then that he realized that the reason everyone loved you so much was because you were so strong, you were there for everyone, but when you needed someone, everyone seemed to turn a blind eye. You were heartbroken and he was going to fix it.

He led you out towards his car gently. You were rubbing your eyes, tears free falling from your lashes and dotting your cheeks like freckles, but unlike the sun-kissed dots that sprinkled peoples skin, yours were full of sadness and remorse. When he opened his car door for you, you looked up at him in quiet gratitude before slipping in; hugging your knees to your chest. He started his car and drove. He drove all over Hawkins, and he continued to drive until nightfall, and your sobs diminished, and all that was left was the sticky imprints of your tears from earlier.

He parked his car on the edge of a small hill, the edge looking down on a small field. He had no idea where they were, but he didn’t have any reason to rush home. He leaned back in his seat, letting out a sigh before he squeezed your shoulder reassuringly and stepped out of the car. He was confused and angry at the world. Why were even his own bloody emotions so damn complicated? Everything in his life was hard, he felt like he would never catch a break.

His eyes danced across the stars, and his breaths were shallow. He only pulled his eyes away when he felt you lean against his shoulder. He was leaning on the hood of his car, his arms crossed over his chest. You leaned into his side, keeping your eyes forward. Your breaths were small and your cheeks were glazed over with crimson from the cold. He watched you carefully and felt his stomach drop. He was finally next to you, he was finally able to see you the way he’s been wanting to see you for weeks, months even. He thought you were absolutely beautiful.

He pulled away from you, taking in a deep breath before he turned to face you and your doe eyes. He gulped softly, his lip catching between his teeth. He could feel his heart beating against his chest, and his cheeks were growing hot, but under the light of the stars, he was positive you wouldn’t notice.

He stepped towards you, his hands landing on either side of you, entrapping you against his car with his arms around you. You didn’t pull away, and rather, you leaned towards him, resting your forehead against his. Your eyes fluttered shut and you let a small sigh escape your lips.

Billy watched you closely, his eyes wide with overflowing emotions. He trained his eyes all over your face before looking at your lips. They looked soft, and he wanted his to be against them, so very badly.

He leaned down, feeling your breath tickle his bottom lip, and when you didn’t pull away, he dove in, kissing you harder. It was slow, passionate and hard. His hands were gripping your waist tightly and yours were in his hair, holding him against you. He was quick to get addicted to the feeling of your lips, so when you pulled away, he was already leaning in for another kiss. Peck after peck, you both began to smile, your kisses becoming sloppier and funnier, and in that moment, Billy knew what he wanted. He wanted you, flaws and all. Sadness and happiness. He wanted more nights like this, he wanted you as a best friend and a lover, and he wanted to kiss you at all hours of the day and night, no matter where.

[call-of-quileutes-blog]

When it Happened.

Here’s my second request! I hope enjoy

(also shoutout to @masochisticlion for helpin ya gurl edit and coming up with the title im useless w/o you abigail)

Request: EmbryxReader where the reader is his imprint but she already has a boyfriend

The sound of the floor creaking under my heavy steps made an echo through the hall as I attempted to sneak my way through the dark house; my head snapping back towards my mother’s bedroom in fear that she had heard me. I held my breath, waiting for her to emerge from her room, pissed off at how late I was coming home; again. I stood there frozen for what felt like hours, but was really less than thirty seconds, before releasing my breath and tip-toeing to my room. I fell face first onto the bed I outgrew last fall after the transformation, turning to my alarm clock and seeing it was just past three in the morning. I groaned and planted my face into the pillow, falling asleep instantly.

The blaring of my alarm jolted me from another night of dreamless sleep. I reached up to hit the snooze button, still too tired from last nights patrol to get out of bed just yet. I rolled onto my side, cocooning into the comforter, considering just skipping school for the day. It was Friday, anyways, and what's one day? My eyelids began to droop and I was almost back asleep when my door slammed open and I sat up in shock.

My mother stood in the doorway, looking like she was about to erupt. She was already dressed and ready for work; her arms were crossed and her jaw was clenched. Her charcoal eyes burned into my own and she didn't even have to say anything as I made my way out of bed and to the bathroom to shower and get ready. She waited outside the door as I got dressed and stood by the table as I ate some dry wheat toast and old coffee. She still didn't say anything as she pointed to her old, beat up hatchback in the driveway and grabbed my book bag, making her way out the door. I followed her in silence, too scared to say anything.

She didn't say anything the entire drive, up until we were stuck in the drop off line, where she tore me a new one about staying out late with my friends and getting into trouble.

“…just don't make the same mistakes I did, that's all—“

“Whoa, wait,” I interrupted her, confused and honestly, a little pissed. “What mistakes?”

I didn’t mean for it to come out as harshly as it did when I saw her flinch slightly out of the corner of my eye. Her cheeks flared up and she opened her mouth to speak again, but then closed it, then opened, then closed; like a fish. I was growing impatient waiting for her answer while she fished around her brain to find a way out of her little flub. Before she could respond though, we had pulled up to the front of the line, and she audibly sighed in relief.

“Have a good day at school, Em.” She leaned over and kissed the side of my head before ruffling my hair and grabbing my book bag out of the back seat.

I forced a smile. “You too, mom. Love ya.”

I got out of the cramped car and stretched my legs, making my way through the sea of copper skin and jet black hair. I could feel their stares as I made my way to the old building and it made my cheeks heat up. It had been more than a year since my growth spurt but they still looked at me like I had grown a second head. Not to mention that rumors of the pack taking steroids still plagued the reservation, much to Sam’s annoyance.

Muscle memory took over as I opened my locker and tossed my back pack in, grabbing a notebook and a pencil, before slamming it shut. I turned around to see Jake and Quil barreling down the hall towards me while the other teenagers scrambled to get out of their way. I chuckled at what the other kids probably thought we did; starting fights, drug use, fu—

“Em, did you do the algebra homework last night?” Quil asked as I fell in step beside him as we made our way to home room.

My face paled a I turned to face him. “We had algebra homework?”

His mouth fell open and he started at me blankly. “Dude.”

My head fell back and I groaned. “What the fuuuuuuck. I was out patrolling ‘til three this morning.”

Jake slapped my back as some sort of sympathetic gesture as we entered the classroom. Our classmates idle chitchat growing quieter as we sat down. The irony in their fear of us was almost hilarious since we were the ones who protected them from constant threat of leeches. I'd look at them and remember what my life was like as a normal teenager who wasn't always grounded for sneaking out late and coming home in the early hours of the morning. My heart ached thinking about a normal life, but knowing that they could all live happy human lives because I helped keep the vampires at bay lifted my spirits.

“So, can I copy that homework or what?” I asked, eyeing Quil from across the table.

He rolled his eyes and fished it from his folder, sliding it across the table to me.

My body felt heavy as I rolled out of bed. I looked at the clock on my bedside table and it read1:34PM. I stretched, feeling stiff and groggy. I had to patrol late again last night because Jared had to resolve a fight he and Kim had gotten into after school yesterday. I rolled my eyes thinking about it, but still felt a twinge of jealousy. Jared had imprinted almost immediately after returning to school after his phase. Paul had imprinted on Rachel. Sam and Emily. Quil and Claire. Jake and Renesmee. I fell back on my pillow and tried to force the feelings away. I was still young and had plenty of time to get my life together before I found my soulmate.

I sighed and pushed the covers off the bed, making my way to the kitchen. I was starving after having to patrol two doubles in a row. I searched the cabinets and fridge but all I could salvage was a stale bagel and a bowl of Raisin Bran. My mom had left last night after dinner and still wasn't home yet. My mind wandered as to where she went but I pushed the thoughts away. I really didn’t want to know. All that mattered was that she was safe wherever she went.

I put on a pair of cutoffs and an old tee shirt and made my way to Emily and Sam’s. They would definitely have some food. It was brisk out, but my unnaturally high body temperature shielded me from the early winter conditions. Luckily, it was just overcast and it hadn't begun to rain yet. Not like that would affect me either; my wolf form kept me from getting sick ad helped me to heal quickly. Basically, I was virtually indestructible.

The small cottage was in my sights and I could already smell an assortment of different baked goods coming from inside. My mouth watered and I broke into a jog.

I burst through the door and ran to the kitchen. Half the pack was already there, devouring the freshly made pastries. I fought Collin over a chocolate chip muffin, pushing him to the ground in triumph, and heading to the couch. I plopped down, kicking my feet up onto the abused coffee table, pulling the paper off the bottom and eating it in two bites. I was still hungry, but didn’t want to try my luck against anyone else. There'd be more food later, anyways.

Quil sat down next to me, handing me another muffin. I nodded at him in thanks as he shoved a whole donut in his mouth, getting crumbs all over himself and the couch. I rolled my eyes at his habits and bit into the pastry. I instantly spit it out and a coughed, throwing the sad excuse for a baked good at Quil.

“Dude, poppy seed? Seriously?!” He snickered as I pushed myself from the couch and walked to the kitchen to get some water to wash the taste from my mouth.

Emily caught my arm as I was reaching for a glass and I turned and gave her a questioning look.

She smiled up at me and I couldn’t help but smile back. “Embry, do you think you could run to the store for me?”

I groaned as I filled the cup with water from the tap. “Like, literally run there or—“

She shook her head and held up a pair of keys. “No, no, no! You can take Sam’s truck!”

I pondered her request; I didn’t really feel up to it after having to pull two doubles in a row, but on the other hand, Emily did take care of us without complaining.

“I'll make a batch of chocolate chip muffins just for you!”

And there was the leverage. I sighed, grabbing the keys from her tiny hand, and held out my palm for her list. She placed the folded paper gingerly in my hand. I opened it up and it fell almost a foot down. My eyes bugged and I looked from the list to her, smiling sweetly as she dug through her purse for some cash.

“Thank you so much, Embry! It really does mean a lot to me.” She cried, giving me a side hug.

My shoulders slumped as I made my way through the house and out to Sam’s old F150. The engine roared to life and I made my way to the closest grocery store which was almost 20 miles away. I drummed my fingers against the wheel to the alternative rock song that played on the radio; musing about how I would've already been there if I had just ran in the first place.

As I came up on the Forks/La Push border, I noticed a car with its hazards flashing. It had begun to drizzle at some point on the 15 minute drive, and there was a person sitting on the bumper getting drenched. My heart strings began tugging in sympathy and I groaned as I pulled over. I threw on the emergencies and hopped out and made my way over the sedan.

“Hey,” I called out to the person sitting in the rain, and their head snapped up. We made eye contact, and that's when I felt the whammy. My head was spinning, but also could only focus on one thing; them. My mouth went dry and my heart fell to the ground as I realized what was happening. “Shit.”

“What?!” They yelled to me over the downpour that had started sometime in the five seconds since I had gotten out of the truck.

“Uh, um, I saw your hazards and was seeing if you needed any help.” I told them as I walked closer. My body craved to be as close as humanly possible, but my mind knew that I would come off as a psychopath, so I tried—seriously, tried—to keep my distance. They were shivering from the rain and I wanted to wrap them in a blanket like a burrito and carry them home and just keep them close and warm and protected. I ran my hands over my face in frustration at this situation, as the rain began to somehow come down even harder.

“Oh.” They shifted awkwardly on the bumper, looking away to the empty road. “Er, uh, well, my boyfriend is actually on his way to pick me up with a tow, so…”

I felt my face fall and tried to recover. Boyfriend. They had a boyfriend. Of course they did. I tried to thinking logically. I'm supposed to be whatever my imprint needs. Whether it be a friend, a lover, or a protecter. And they obviously needed a protector right now.

“Well, I'll wait with you until he gets here, if you want. It's pretty dangerous out here.” I tried to comply with the situation at hand, even though I could feel my heart breaking with every uncomfortable shift they made. “I could even take a look at your car if you want. I know a thing or two.”

They glanced around uncomfortably and sighed. “I mean, I guess. You're not, like, a murderer, right?”

I snorted. “Definitely not. So what's wrong with it?”

“It just…won't start?” It came out as a question and I couldn’t help but laugh again.

“Lemme take a look.” I said walking closer and they hopped off the bumper and opened the door.

They put the key in the ignition an tried to turn it, but all that came out was a loud gurgle. I asked them to pop the hood, and they did so. I took a closer look and nodded to myself.

I shut the hood and turned to see them nervously biting their nail. The rain had lightened up a little bit and I could see their hair sticking to their face, their eyebrows knitted together, and staring of into the distance deep in thought. I smiled to myself, wondering what they were thinking. What did they think of me? Did they like me?

Oh. Boyfriend. Right.

I attempted to push the imprint from my mind. “So, it looks like its just your battery. If you want, your boyfriend can bring it by my place and I can take a better look and fix it for the cheap. A mechanic will milk you for all you have, when it's really a cheap, easy fix.”

They turned to me, confusion painted over their features. I searched their eyes for something—anything—but I couldn’t tell what they were thinking. They just stared at me blankly. I dug my toe into the ground waiting for some kind of response, but they just stayed silent; and the silence was heavy.

They cleared their throat. “He has a guy, but thanks, uh…”

“Embry.” I smiled even though I felt like I was spiraling into the seventh sector of Hell.

“Thanks, Embry.” They held out their hand, and my own engulfed it. Touching them felt like a million volts of electricity flowing through my veins, and I never wanted to let go.

As soon as it had happened, they let go. “I’m Y/N, by the way—oh. Here he comes now. Better late than never, I guess.” They chuckled lightly under their breath as they stepped away from me and waved down a pair of headlights.

The tow truck pulled up and I got back in Sam’s truck. I sat there for a minute while they loaded the car onto the trailer. I felt like a million bees had made a home in my chest as I watched them pull off their soaked parka and exchange it for a dry one their boyfriend had brought. I then felt the bees die inside me as I saw him take their face in his hands and give them a gentle kiss on their forehead. The smile that illuminated from them made my heart somehow soar and deflate at the same time.

They began to climb in the truck, but turned back to give me one last look as I sat in the cab. They waved and gave me a small smile, and my heart burst. I felt a wide range of emotions as the tow pulled away and I made my way back onto the road; the most prominent was the gaping hole of incompleteness I felt in my chest.

[skywailer]

✉️ wOOP okay so um i'm charlotte my fave animal is either a horse or dolphin (wowie i'm so basic) my fave song is when the day met the night by patd i love the rain and the cold so much it makes me sO happy i don't believe in proper pUncTuAtIon and CaPiTaLizAtIoN when communicating online bc it looks ugly and screw the rULES (so im sorry) idk i say sorry too much but that ain't gonna stop me from apologizing uH and my favorite all time character is fred (pretend i sent this from my sideblog)

you are so cute, I can’t- ok, here you go!  Sorry it’s a bit late; I got wrapped up in writing but ta-da!

Wanna know what your first year at Hogwarts looks like through caffeinated eyes?

how you got your Hogwarts acceptance letter: you’d been hearing from friends that they were getting their letters, yet yours had yet to arrive.  Which was odd, because your magic has a way of rudely interrupting your daily routine- papers floating away from you when you’re flabbergasted about what to write, little rain storms trickling down on you in the middle of the night (you don’t really complain about those).  So what gives?  You weren’t sure what to make of it and, despite the nagging feeling of worry in your gut, you tried not to overthink it.  It was on a particularly cloudy August day that your letter arrived, and you weren’t even at the house to receive it.  Since it was cloudy, you decided to take your dogs out for a walk in hopes of catching a little rain (you wanted to show off your new purple polka-dot umbrella so badly).  It rained, but… uh, not the way you thought it would?  Apparently, there was a misunderstanding at the post about where exactly you lived; your family had moved during the summer, and were traveling.  You were sitting on a bench, watching Max and Daisy play in the dry grass, when something flat and wide slapped you on the nose.  From above.  Before you could really register the small envelope that slid off your face and onto your lap, there was another “plop” at your shoulder, another plop at your feet, your head, and when you looked up there was a small horde of owls dropping pellets of letters on you.  You didn’t even have time to open your cute umbrella.  Your dogs happily helped you clean up the puddle of letters and, for once, you worried about the grumbling clouds above.  Wouldn’t do to have a soggy supply list, right?

head canons about your trip on the Hogwarts Express: despite being positively giddy at the thought of going on this particular train, the second you charged through to platform 9 ¾, you were struck with nerves and remained still at the entrance.  Taking it all in: the heavy steam sticking to your pores like morning mist (except way more polluted, yikes) and the cacophony of kids yelling and parents audibly yanking out their hair trying to maneuver carts without crashing into one another, into other people’s running kids.  With a THWACK, someone’s cart ran into you from behind, and for a moment you wondered if you’d have to go to Hogwarts in a wheelchair.  A bit dramatic, especially since the cart barely hit you.  When a familiar voice heckled you from behind with an “Oi, move your bum!” your nerves melt.  A friend from your neighborhood has arrived and the fear of being alone vanished.  You boarded the train after a quick goodbye to your family, knowing from the herd that seats will be impossible to find, and you wanted to make sure you’re seated with a friend.  Right off the entrance you spotted the one, golden empty cabin.  You caught the eye of another student, tall and ginger, and with impossibly long legs down the corridor, and it was a very rigged race to the cabin.  Somehow, though, you two managed to crash into each other and your friend applauds your ability to get wedged in the doorway with a Pretty Cute Guy.  Unfortunately, Pretty Cute Guy had a family of gingers trampling down the corridor to score the cabin, too.  Since you were wedged in the doorway with him, you actually have a perfect spot to negotiate terms with him.  You ended up sharing the cabin with your friend, and new friends: the Weasleys.  The Pretty Cute Guy told you his name is Fred, but him and his twin brother made sure to trick you about who was who any time they returned to the cabin from food and bathroom runs.  You made sure to take advantage of their tallness to put up your luggage above the seats, and to take it back down at the end of the trip.  They have since made sure to make fun of your shortness.

what happened when you went head-to-head hat with the sorting hat: you come from a house of Hufflepuffs, so you were pretty certain what you were going to get as you approached the holy stool - even if the idea of being a Hufflepuff didn’t really sit well with you.  Something about that toil bit didn’t attract you.  But even though your favorite crew of redheads were Gryffindors, that didn’t seem right either- not for you.  You sat down, smiling, but your brain was pretty petrified: were you going to be revealed as a cunning devil, an enlightened bird, a brave lion or a determined honey-badger?  The hat sat on your head for a while trying to figure things out, because Merlin knows you were still figuring things out.  Eventually, it gave a huff and a puff and called out, “Ravenclaw!”  And while that’s been awesome to be decreed smart, you’re wondering when that’ll kick in homework-wise.  A little Hufflepuff determination would be nice around exam time.

who’s your squad: It’s hard to see you within the clump, since the Weasleys are a stretched out bunch of spaghetti strands, but - whenever someone can’t find you- people know which gingers you’re usually around.  The Twins were and continue to be a completely horrible influence on you, and when the three of you are in the same room together, it’s impossible to find an iota of peace or quiet.  Your first year was spent hanging out with Ron and Hermione (she’s the only one who can pick your butt into doing your homework, but she’s also a little annoying in that she actually reads in her leisure time and you…. well, you’ll get to her recommendations eventually).  You have, on multiple occasions, eyed them suspiciously when they talk to each other because there is something there and it’s fun to tease them.  You also love to keep the company of your fellow Ravenclaw, Luna, who shares your love of all things and who is always up for a small adventure outside to look at the sky, sit in the rain, or something else that …. isn’t exactly academic.

general first-year shenanigans you were up to while Harry was being Harry:

A majority of the points deducted from the Ravenclaw house was thanks to you.  You have a bad habit of talking in Professor Snape’s class, and he was very generous with how many points he’d take when your mouth opened.  He wasn’t the only professor to wish you’d write a little more and talk a little less.  

you’ve gotten at least two detentions for running late to class because you were sleeping in.  At least your house was spared point deductions?

Fred and George always had a way to sneak you out of those detentions anyway.

you’ve made it up to your house on various occasions, due to your creativity in class and ability to come up with answers on the fly.  This also helped loads when you needed to finish homework JUST before class started.

you nearly froze your butt off during the winter, hanging out in the astronomy tower, writing.  

when you accidentally found out that there was a three-headed dog, you refused to believe Ron when he said it was the ugliest thing he’d ever seen, because dogs are the best and you almost tricked him into telling you were it was.  Almost.

at the end of the year, as you got back on the train and Fred loaded your stuff above the seat for you, again, you realized two things:

1: you were crushing hard on that funny beanstalk of a boy and

2: you totally forgot to return the books you’d borrowed from Hermione and Cho.  And you hadn’t even read them.  Again.