#i love that fucking meme too LMAOO

[tunanoodlesoup]

OHYM GKOODD its my boy USHUGD MLMAOOO he is my littol creatur hes like a wet spong but full of only paint <333

sebslug :)

[23victoria]

Passing the Phone

f1 grid x reader

warnings: cussing, unhinged, satire, complete jokes (are they?...), dark humor ig…idk, talk of age gaps, sa allegations, no just kidding...very much reading people to the filth

authors note: lmaoo don’t ask me why i wrote this cause idk…but this is so unhinged 😭😭 please don’t take offense to this and if you do…i said don’t…all jokes i love them, some of them, you can find it funny or you won’t, just wanted to get this out of my drafts

want to be tagged in my works?! CLICK HERE!

f1 masterlist

Video starts with Y/N holding the phone, in selfie mode.

Y/N: I'm passing the phone to someone who had the biggest breakup in F1 history with a blond German boy named Nico.

Lewis: Babe, no!

Y/N: What, too soon? It's been years but okay! Sorry! Okay, let me start again. I'm passing the phone to someone who said "Fuck Mercedes" and is going to Ferrari for 2025!

Lewis: Y/N, no!! You cannot say that! You’re gonna get me in trouble!!

Y/N: Fine, fine, fine. I'm passing the phone to the GOAT of this generation with the most wins in F1 history, yet he was robbed of the championship in 2021.

Y/N passes the phone to Lewis.

Lewis: stares at Y/N then laughs “I'm passing the phone to someone who is known more for his memes than driving skills.”

Lewis passes the phone to George.

George: laughs “Hahaha real funny…I'm passing the phone to someone who took six years to get their first win."

Lando: “Dude, what the fuck?! Fuck you, Woody! I'm passing the phone to someone who's younger than me yet acts years older than me.”

Oscar: “....You're not funny... I'm passing the phone to someone who's most likely losing their seat next season.”

Logan: “The fuck, Oscar! I thought we were friends! Low blow, mate. I'm passing the phone to someone who has yet to get P1, yet all his friends who got into F1 after him have won races already.”

Alex: “....And that, Logan, is why you're losing your seat. Mr. What The Fuck is A Kilometer. Anyway, I'm passing the phone to someone who just got brutally murdered by an interviewer on Sky Sports regarding their F1 career, if you could call it that.”

Daniel: “You shouldn’t be talking Mr. I Have No Wins….eat shit…I'm passing the phone to the shortest person on the grid but cusses more than anyone here.”

Yuki: “That interviewer was right, why the fuck do you still have a seat in F1?!! Dickhead. I'm passing the phone to a man with good fashion sense and his teammate might steal his seat.”

Zhou: “Bro….really. I'm passing the phone to someone who acts like he's Australian when he’s not…oh, and his seat is at risk too.”

Bottas: “Yeah, yeah, whatever mate. I'm passing the phone to someone who has enough penalties in just nine races that he can be banned from racing in F1… permanently.

Kevin: “You're so funny, Bottas, hahaha…ha. I'm passing the phone to a dickhead.”

Nico: “Fuck you too asshole. I'm passing the phone to a person who has a shitty ass dad who deserves to be in jail.”

Max: burst out laughing “Ah, no lies told there. I'm passing the phone to someone who only has a seat to protect me from having any real competition…”

You laugh in the background “Oh shit.”

Checo: blank stare “Motherfucker! That just shows your true colors... I'm passing the phone to... who am I supposed to pass it to... uhhh... Y/N.

Takes phone 

Y/N: “Oh, I know! I'm passing the phone to someone who has sexual assault “allegations” against them, but the FIA wants to hide it. I can’t go near him for my safety, so I’ll just turn the camera towards him... *pans the camera to Christian Horner*

Everyone is stunned and silent, then there’s Lewis laughing in the background 

Y/N: “Oh! I have another one! Hey Kelly, “i hear you like them young”, to be more specific at the ripe age of 17... mhmmm, she's a pedoo. What Kendrick say “TRYNA STRIKE A CORD AND ITS PROBABLY A MINNORRRR” *pans the camera to Kelly Piquet*

silence.

Lewis: runs towards Y/N and grabs the camera “Yup, that's enough for today. You're trying to start problems and get people beat up”

Video ends with Lewis taking the phone away from Y/N, shaking his head while laughing.

.•☆.°.•.*₊ ☆ .*₊ .• ☆.°.• .

✿ .° • everything taglist • °. ✿ : @ham1lton @ietss @animeandf1lover @nelly187 @heartsfromtaeyong @bloodyymaryyy @nor-4 @zacian117 @mel164 @uhhvictoria @hadidsworld @magixpracticality @exotic-iris13 @tellybearryyyy @zabwlky1999 @sya-skies @lillysbigwilly

@eoduuung

.•☆.°.•.*₊ ☆ .*₊ .• ☆.°.• .

*sooooo……that’s the end….LMFAOOOO, again…DO NOT COME FOR ME…ITS JOKES (is it really though)*

© 23victoria 2023-24 I all rights reserved. do not republish, steal repost, modify, translate or claim my work as your own

[aouiaa]

[✶] — YOUTUBER!ELLIE HEADCANNONS

DISCLAIMERS & WARNINGS — EIGHTEEN PLUS, Mentions of pooping + Cursing (Girl cursing like she just learned) + Mention of hand pics (I think that’s it).

AUTHORS NOTE, took fucking forever to make that image, but i love it. — inspo layout: @andersonfilms :3

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who is blatantly honest on youtube. It’s scary.

She’s playing a random indie video game she found on steam, and giving her commentary as usual. Until there’s a sudden cut and she’s now in different clothes than the previous and she goes on to explain why.

“Hey, guys. Sorry, I had to take a massive shit, but guess who survived? This guy!” she says with a comical smile while pointing at herself before unpausing the game and playing as if nothing happened.

But for some reason, Youtuber!Ellie can’t let go that she pooped.

“But yeah, guys, like, shit, that fucker was begging to come out, so I’m sorry if I was acting different. I was clenching my asshole.”

How charming….ANYWAYS.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie’s videos who have these stupid sound effects or pop-up memes for certain scenes.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie having a resting bitch face when she’s focused.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who cusses too much even in her intro, she’s literally cussing.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who got a warning from YouTube themselves for it.

Imaging Youtuber!Ellie who literally said “Fuck that, I’m not following Youtube’s rules.” and continued cussing until she realized that she was getting less ads on her videos to which she decided to do a test. To see if her subscribers would notice if she did a full video, not cursing.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who’s laughing while reading the comments on the video.

DarthVaderfan101: “Yo, y’all noticed how Ellie didn’t cuss once?”

Quacketyquack12: “Great vid btw no cussing?! THAT’S A FIRST!”

Elliesprettygirl: Sooo when’s our wedding?

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who does eventually swallows her pride and abides by Youtube’s rules.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie whose user is some cringe 2011 based name; Ellieswolfgang.

God, I can just fucking imagine Youtuber!Ellie intro and how it would correlate with the user.

“Yo! What’s up my little wolves! *Queue the wolf howling* We are back with another video and today we’re playing another puppet combo game!”

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who thinks it’s too hilarious, and doesn’t change the username. And it’s always funny to see people every now and then comment about it.

Iloveellieswolfgang: “Woah, are we apart of your pack or something?”

Ellieswolfgang: Yeah, if you’re subscribed then you’re a part of the gang.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who has the most funniest responses when replying to fans.

Wolfgangnation: “Yo, Ellieswolfgang! 👋”

Ellieswolfgang: “Yo, Wolfgangnation!”

Dyk3ang3l: AHHHH I LITERALLY JUMPED WHEN I SAW YOUR NOTIFICATION POP UP ON MY PHONE JEHDBSHAS

Ellieswolfgang: Ma’am, this is a library.

les4elliewilliams: So why is your name, Ellieswolfgang?

Ellieswolfgang: I don’t know, les4elliewilliams. Why is yours, les4elliewilliams?

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who wakes up at the asscrack of dawn—her words—to make Youtube videos, and edits them before eight am.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who is known for her out of pocket humor.

“That isn’t a guy! That’s an ass with eyes!”

“GodDAMN, that bitch can lick three assholes from that tongue.”

Imaging Youtuber!Ellie who asks her followers on twitter to send her funny videos or scary videos to react to.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who flinched so hard while watching a scary video a subscriber sent, she fell off her chair.

Gamerpro121: “Surprised she didn’t fall off her chair this time LMAOO

Ellieswolfgang: Literally the lowest point in my life… 💔

Gamerpro121: Oh shit, sorry man.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who has to explain her jokes from time to time because some boomer doesn’t get it.

Ellieswolfgang: No, not actually. 😭 nvm..

Gamerpro121: Oh…OHHHH

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who was shocked when her merch quickly sold out after minutes of it just being released.

“Holy fuck, thank you guys for selling out my merch?! Didn’t expect that shit to happen! Man, y’all attacked it like flies attacking shit!”

Charming as always…

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who sometimes blogs, showing her day to day life, going to the gym, running errands, rating foods from restaurants, etc.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who reacts to edits her fans make of her and is also shocked how many people love her hands.

“Woah, fuck youtube, Ima start selling hand pics. Missing the real bag here.”

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who collabs with her best friend Jesse, playing GTA, Minecraft, cod, and whatever games that her subscribers suggest since they love their dynamic.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie’s fans who love her dynamic with Jesse because they’re always talking shit to each other.

“You dumbass! That guy was right in front of you!” Ellie yells at Jesse who just got them killed during a 1v1 on Fortnite.

“How is this my fault? It’s not my fault, you suck!”

“Says you! A blind three year old can play better than you.”

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who makes a video reading hate comments.

Allthegirlslove: “Ellie looks like she smells like shit!”

“Well…Allthegirlslove, new flash, All the girls don’t love you because they’re too busy watching my videos.” She says with a smirk, “And new flash,” she stops and sniffles herself, “I just shower before making this video, thank you very much.”

The video cuts and starts again of her showing the cologne she uses, “This is what I use, buy one and spray it in ya ass!”

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who actually dresses to impress when she’s about to record a new video.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who has her serious moments on the channel and that’s when the true love and support come into light. And she is truly grateful for the fans who can put the joking aside and just be there for her.

Youtuber!Ellie who genuinely loves how far her channel has come since she first started, and genuinely appreciates everyone who helped her meet her milestones.

FIRST PART - NEXT PART

TAGLIST ; @dyk3ang3l, @elliesprettygirl, @les4elliewilliams, @ellies2fingers, @r3starttt, @slut4mascss, @marsworlddd, @bready101

ELLIES TAGLIST ; @herelieskrisy, @mikellie, @slaysksmska, @mina-281, @teawithnosugar, @kitkatkittycat111

[irisintheafterglow]

(approaching you like the homeless ant meme) enemy frat!suguru pt 3?

LMAOO of course anon my friend if you ask i will provide <3 hope you like it since i've missed writing him :)) please welcome back enemy frat!suguru !!!

cw: down BAD suguru, mentions of sex/hookup culture, swearing, implied fem!reader but they/them pronouns used <3

there must have been something in the air of that garden, since his chest was constricting him more than the droves of sorority girls and frat boys present for the joint philanthropy event.

"holy fuck," he breathes, or at least tries to. his pulse was racing but his legs were frozen in place, all of his attention going toward trying to breathe properly. he swallows thickly and it doesn't help, and his hands feel like they're slowly starting to drip with sweat. all because you had to appear in the doorway.

"aw, is that them? they look beautiful," satoru comments. suguru can only manage a weak mhmm before he turns away, blinking rapidly and exhaling so deeply it sounds like a dying animal. "shit, man. you good?" suguru throws his roommate a shaky thumbs-up, leaning the other hand on the wall and barely able to keep himself upright.

"i don't know what the hell is happening to me," he manages to choke out. "my heart feels like it's about to rip itself from my chest." with a wild-eyed expression, he glances at satoru only to find his best friend smirking, amusement crinkling the corners of his eyes. "what the fuck do you look like that for?"

"pull yourself together, suguru. if i had known you would be this affected seeing the love of your life, i would have brought my camera," satoru remarks all too casually, shooting nearby spectators a casual smile. suguru makes a noise of suffering from his throat and satoru thinks he's trying to say 'fuck you.'

"they're not the love of my life," suguru says after several seconds of catching his breath. "they're a fling. a good time."

"have you asked them for sex?" he turns to satoru like he'd just suggested setting your sorority house on fire.

"what the hell? of course not."

"it's not a fling, then."

"how would you know?"

"your flings are only physical, but this is something more than that. plus, you wouldn't be this emotional if they were anything otherwise," satoru points out, and suguru is too flustered to admit that he's right.

"i'm not being emotional," he hisses, pulling the band from his hair and turning it into a neater half-bun. "i just think they're a good time without the sex."

"and i think you're lying to yourself," satoru concludes, giving his delusional friend a pat on the back before disappearing into the crowd. before suguru has the chance to chase him down, you're standing in front of him with two cups of punch in your hands.

"what'd satoru say to make you so distraught?" you ask with a smile, handing him one of the cups. he takes an indulgent sip to avoid answering you immediately, the silence allowing him to slow his thoughts. your sisters, for the time being, were nowhere to be found, so he had at most five minutes of conversation before they whisked you away.

"don't remember, probably somethin' stupid," he lies. you consider him curiously and he prays that he doesn't look like a mess; if you notice something off about him, you thankfully don't comment on it. "you look nice."

"just nice?"

"what else do you want me to say?"

"that we can get the hell out of here whenever i want to leave." he chuckles, gently guiding you out of the walkway and into a quieter corner of the courtyard. your voice softens when other students are well out of earshot, saying, "your face is flushed. what's wrong?"

"it's nothing. don't worry about it," he reassures you, mustering as much courage as he can to not look like an idiot.

"i am gonna worry about it if you don't tell me," you murmur, stepping closer in the darkness. he prays you couldn't hear him gulp from the intoxicating smell of your perfume drawing him in, in, in. "i worry about you more than i'd like to admit."

"tell me more about how much you think about me, sweetheart," he says in a low tone and you scoff, unable to stop the unconscious desire to be as close to suguru as humanly possible.

to the untrained eye, everything about the situation was innocent, an intimate conversation between friends at most. but, if they looked closer, they would see suguru's eyes unable to decide whether to look at your eyes or your lips, or even further down as they rake across your dress. they would see your fingers brush away loose strands of hair and carefully tuck them behind his ear, your fingertips lingering on his skin in a way that makes him feel like he's been set on fire.

in the unlit corner of the school's philanthropic event, suguru realized that satoru was right. everything about you changed him, his mind, and how he viewed the future. all he wanted was to be yours until time stopped moving and space stopped expanding; even then, he knew he would find you in any other lifetime. his only worry was whether you could fathom how eager he was to lose himself in you.

his mind goes blank.

and he leans forward to press his lips against yours.

you inhale sharply, immediately melting into him as his hands find your waist and your arms slide around his neck. he kisses you fervently like the tension in his body finally snapped and his composure went flying out of a window. you taste like minty gum and strawberry lip gloss and all he can think about is giving you more, more, more until you're sick of how much he adores you.

"suguru-" you start when you break away to breathe, looking at him like he was the moon incarnate.

"i can't breathe when i'm not with you," he confesses before you can continue, his voice barely a whisper. he waits for you to protest, to pull away and leave him, but you pull him closer and that's all the permission he needs. "i thought this would be some secret fling where the thrill only comes from the riskiness, but i am totally and deeply in love with you. it's kind of ruining my reputation as the frat house bad boy."

"what do you mean, your reputation? who have you told about me?"

"basically everyone," he answers sheepishly and you laugh, hiding your face in his shoulder. "yeah, sorry. everyone in the boys' house knows about us."

"you couldn't keep your mouth shut about me for one more month?"

"we made that agreement to tell our houses when i was still only one foot in," he argues. "but you kinda pushed me into the love-pool, so..."

"i did no such thing," you counter lightheartedly, kissing the corner of his mouth. "it's your fault for falling head over heels for me."

"i don't think it's just head over heels. i think i'm rolling down a hill, so it's like head over heels over head over heels over-"

"okay, okay," you cut in. "i get it, lover boy. now, shut up and kiss me again before my sisters find us and apprehend you."

"i'll get satoru to be our lawyer. we already have a plan ready-"

"suguru geto," you command.

"fine, fine," he grins before leaning down and kissing you until you're both dizzy.

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[archangeldyke-all]

im gonna fight this app istg-

Okay so-

Sev with:

Bimbo/goth reader, mute reader, thick thighed reader, reader with glasses, reader who can beat her at cards, (insert animal) hybrid reader, scientist reader, milf reader, Cheshire cat-like coded reader (I can explain that if u don't get it lol <3), and street racer reader

(this is all my brainrot lol enjoy and be aggressively gay<3)

☁️🍄

cloud anon!!! i'm so glad ur ask finally got thru! i have many thoughts on many of these...

men and minors dni

sevika and mute reader would be so fucking cute, because sevika's already a woman of few words. she'd love learning sign language to talk to you, being able to communicate even across the busy bar, able to talk shit about people right in front of them. she'd adore it.

sevika would die for a thunder-thighed reader. like, she's got some thick thighs herself, but on her girl? she'd never be able to take her hands off you. (or her mouth. or her teeth.)

she'd be simultaneously turned on and pissed off if you beat her at cards. if it happened more than once? she'd consider quitting forever. (she's just glad she's losing to someone so fucking hot-- not one of the slimy guys she usually plays with.) after beating her like 5 or 6 times in a row, she'd be unable to call it 'luck' anymore, and would concede to your superior skills. (then she'd ask you out, and beg you to teach her how the fuck you got so good.)

sevika and milf reader! she'd be certain she doesn't want kids, until she meets you. when she finally meets your kids? she'd swear they're the cutest things in the world. you know the meme that's like 'i've only had this puppy for two days, but if something happened to it i'd kill everyone in this room and then myself' -- that's sevika meeting your kids. (also, she'd always call you a milf. any chance she can get. she'd buy all those stupid t-shirts and bumperstickers that say i <3 milfs too lmaoo)

ok streetcar racer reader!?? sevika would think you're the hottest thing she's ever seen. if you ever take her for a ride, she'd be shitting herself the entire time-- horrified by your speed, but incredibly turned on by your skill. she's totally an adrenaline junkie, so you can bet your ass she's fucking you in the backseat once you finally park.

taglist!

@lesbeaniegreenie @fyeahnix @sapphicsgirl @half-of-a-gay @ellabslut @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner @shimtarofstupidity @love-sugarr @chuucanchuucan @222danielaa @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther @gr0ssz0mbi3 @ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @leomatsuzaki

[yae-energy]

pick up the phone !!!

synopsis: my take on whether they’re a caller or texter

cast: yuji itadori, megumi fushiguro, nobara kugisaki

cw: cursing, usage of the nword, kinda proofread

a/n: sorta just filler work, i was in the mood to write smth but didn’t want to do too much. might make a part 2 with the second years

megumi - texter

do not expect this dude to answer ANY calls LOL

calling means you have to talk a whole bunch and he’d rather just…not

like it’s physically draining to him (same tho)

even so, bro is a dry ass texter, like he’s one of those people where you have to read it in his voice for it to not sound so dead

you could prob send him smth earth shatteringly hilarious and bro will respond to it like

“lmaoo” or “im dead”

like damn nigga put some enthusiasm into it 😭

his read receipts are off cause he has a habit of looking at texts and forgetting to respond. he figured if he turned them off he wouldn’t hurt anyones feelings by accident

the dnd stays on!!

he sends voice messages if he doesn’t feel like typing a whole lot

he doesn’t have contact photos for anyone, everyone got that nasty default letter one

has gojo muted cause he’s always texting him about dumb shit 😭

no one in his pinned

will text you out of the blue and ask if you wanna hang out

could be 2am but that won’t stop him

“wanna run to the gas station?”

“my nigga it’s 1 in the morning 💀”

“not reading all that, you coming or not?”

—

nobara - caller (specifically facetime)

this bitch loves being on the phone !!! especially with people she’s real, real, close with

expects you to pick up EVERY SINGLE FACETIME CALL and if you don’t best believe she’s finna spam text you

“bitch ik you saw my call 🤨”

“answer your phone rn ik you not doing nothing with your lonely ass”

she’ll eat you up fr if you don’t answer 😭

facetimes with her are lit thooo, like she always has a story to tell

“and then guess what happened!!!”

is a bad texter tho

like really bad

she’ll either answer in 3 seconds or 3 weeks, you’ll never know !!

has certain people muted if she doesn’t like them

only has 3 convos in her pinned and one is a gc with her, yuji, and megumi

gojo is blocked LOL

she blocked yuji once too and forgot to unblock him (he kept sending her those wolf memes)

—

yuji - both, but more of a caller

he loves phone calls !!! especially facetimes

he likes being able to see and hear the people he’s talking to

takes screenshots

he usually facetimes when he has like,,, chores to do? like if he’s gotta clean his room or something he’ll call so that way he can stay focused

likes when you talk about your day or if you have a story to share, he gets INVESTED

“what??? that’s kinda fucked up… what’d she do next???”

is lowkey an instigator

“me personally…. i wouldn’t let him talk to me like that”

eats on the phone!

bro has a whole mukbang set up don’t play with him!

he’s also a very engaging texter

has a perfect reaction photo for any situation

sends lots of tiktoks

i feel like when he’s expressing laughter he does the keyboard smash thing

or he’ll go like

“BYEEEE LMAOOO 😭😭”

everyone has a special name and contact photo

[tightjeansjavi]

STOP you literally read my mind i was just thinking about pornstar joel giving you a massage omg with candles and oil n everything omg that'd be so hot fuck lmaoo

AHHH great minds think alike, nonnie ;)

RIGHT?? I was already scrolling through Pinterest to find some inspo pics and couldn’t find any 😭😭

I know it’s 1000% his idea too because he’s just so 😵‍💫

dude is so so in love. I wanna put a ring on HIS finger 🥵

I’m also a slut for non-penetrative intimacy like FUCK! Just his big hands kneading your skin, lathered in oil and that goddamn bedroom voice of his—

Pussy: wet

Heart: bursting

@gasolinerainbowpuddles you always know exactly what memes are needed I swear 🤯

[teddybeartoji]

okay ima js ask all at once and if i thinknof more ill ask then

1.) when'd u get ur first tat?

- on like a 10 point scale, 10 being the worst pain known to man, how much did it hurt?

2.) which tat of urs hurt the most??

- was it bc of the placement or the type of tat u got?

3.) (u dont have to ans this one if its too personal) but do any of ur tattoos mean anything or do you js like being a canvas for art???

4.) what type of tat styles do you prefer?

- can be on yourself or things you js like

5.) which one of ur tattoos took the longest to do?

-and the quickest too cause why not

6.) what made you get into tatts???

GRAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY I'M SOO LATEE DO YOU STILL LOVE MEEEEEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I'M SORRYY

1. iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii got mine rather late actually considering i knew i wanted one wayyy before i turned 18 lmao. iii think i got it when i was 20!!!

the pain was nothingggg lmaoo the tat in on the back of my arm, like above the elbow (?) so there's just soft skin there yk? i almost fell asleep lmao. on a scale of 1 to 10 i would say a 4???? it genuinely didn't feel like anything BUT I AM ALSO. GOOD WITH PAIN. LIKE OVERALL. SO JUST KEEP THAT IN MIND OKAY.

just to add on the pain tolerance thing, or just to prove that i'm good with it i guess lmao the ones i have on my stomach/ribs literally just felt GOOD. like i remember wincing exactly once bc he went over my hipbone but that was it. even one of the other tattoo artists at the studio said "good luck" before leaving ahgshgasghah but they really just feel good. like i genuinely got horny from those:33

2. i didn't think it was gonna hurt the most honestly but it's the one i have on my inner forearm, just below the elbow. so while that's just soft skin too, it's waaayyy more sensitive. there is a chance that it was a bit bc of the tattoo artist too - she was a bit of a beginner. i would give that like a 6 out of 10, maybe even a 7? it wasn't that bad the whole time though, the seven was just when she was doing the inner part of the arm, the most sensitive place. but hehehe i survived!!!

(she also accidentally pricked me with the needle lmao so i have the teeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeniest tiniest dot on my hand now:333 but it's so small that i have to really look for it ahshgahgsagh aand i wasn't mad too i thought it was really funny ehehehehe)

JKKKKK I CAME BACK HERE TO TELL YOU THAT I LIEDD I THINK MY MOST PAINFUL ONE WAS THE ONE ON MY FINGER ACTUALLYY I JUST KINDA FORGOT ABT THATT LMAOO but i mean that makes sense doesn't it? it like just on bone so it did not feel good. but since it's not a big tat i didn't have to suffer for long!!!!! aand i definitely want more of them still:333333

3. my tats don't have any meaning!!!!!!!!!!! i obvi don't have anything against tats like that i just haven't felt the need or desire to get smth like that. i am thinking abt getting a mitski "a losing dog" tat and i guess that would have a meaning (said meaning just being that i am a losing dog too but idk how deep that really is lmao)

i see a design i like and i get it!!!!!!!! and i am not opposed to funny silly tats either!!!!!!!!!! like the thigh one i have - "i'm so fucking awesome everyone loves me" i just saw the meme and i've never decided on anything faster. i just knew i had to get that on me. so idk if you know disco elysium but this guy is such a fuckup and i love him with my whole heart he is very relatable and the pic was just so fucking funny too i loved it so much I STILL LOVE IT BTWW my second favourite tattoo<3333333

got it on my 21st birthday too lmao i think that makes it even better

4. SOOOOOOOOOOOOO idk what to really call this style. it's DEFINITELY NOTTTTT for everybody and i completely understand that but i am fucking obsessssedd with it. i am sadly very very very far from where i'd wanna be with my tats, i look nothing like the pics i'm gonna give u but ahhhh one dayy....

tat 1 + tat 2 + tat 3; like these are soooooooooofucking sexy to meee goood goddd my eyes just rolled back inside my headd aaaaaaaaaa i wanna be covered in them pls

and here are two better pics of a few of mine hehe:333 the skulls were the second most painful ones1!!

5. theeee longest was the big black one on my arm!!!!!! but that wasn't that long either imo... three hours maybe? three and a half??? man i can't remember but it wasn't too bad!! almost fell asleep during that one too hahahahah

omg and with this one, i was laying down on my stomach right? and my head was turned to the other side for some time and then yk my neck was getting sore so i turned around and i looked at the machine in his arm and i. hm. so yk how there's like a small needle there... it was no longer a tiny one. it was a WIDE ONE?????? and he saw my eyes go a bit wide and he went thirteen :D COME AGAINN???? thirteen needles in one. i had thirteen of them in me at once :DD and i didn't even feel it ahgsghashhaga the look of it just caught me off guard lmao

AAAAAAAAAAAA and the quickest was the one on my fingerr i think in total i spent like an hour and a half at the studio??? but most of it just went to him trying to get the design on there right bc my fingers are CROOKED AS FUCKKKKK rip.

6. I'VE ALWAYS BEEN INTO THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!! literally for as long as i can remember i thought they were super cool!!!!!!!!!! one of my dad's friends has a sick tat on his forearm (hehehe i think i kinda subconsciously did that one a bit after him yk)(though the designs are very different!!! it's the Vibe)

aaand my mom has tats too even thougghh she's not abt that life anymoreee lmaoo it's kinda funny. and my dad has a bunch now too, but he only got more into it just a little before i did idk i think he was kind of a pussy before or smth.

[hermanunworthy]

!DNDADS S2 EP39 SPOILERS!

the time has come. i have felt physically ill anticipating this episode. LETS GO!

- i would first like to inform everyone that i am wearing a black and purple scary inspired outfit and a bracelet that says "doodler" on it as i listen to this episode

- WILLY INTRO. GOD

- class changes would be kinda cool i will admit

- taylors doing music stuff now ooo living up to his namesake. well he def cant make music under his real name lol

- THE HESITANCE ON "WILSON". MATT WHY.

- every fact i hear about grant and marcos parenting makes me die a little more each time

- STRICTLY SHOES ON??? IN THE OAK SWALLOWS GARCIA HOUSE?? oh no wonder that familys so fucked up.

- so what im hearing. is that normal is just wearing heelys at all times

- ITS STARTING. THE DOODLER. THE DOODLERS COMING. IM NOT READY

- ANTHONY THAT IS NOT WHAT THE GRIMACE SHAKE MEME IS IM CRYING

- IM HERE ANTICIPATING THE DOODLER READY TO EXPLODE AND THESE FUCKERS ARE SITTING HERE TALKING ABOUT MCDONALDS CUM 😭

- STOP JOKING ABOUT THE SEASON BEING OVER I DONT WANT IT TO END ANYTIME SOON

- WILLY SAYING "I LOVE YOU" IS THE MOST DISGUSTING SHIT GET THAT AWAYYY

- "hey willy nobodys gonna listen to u anymore" HELLLL YEAH GET HIM SCARY

- NONE OF THEM KNOW WHAT TO DO NOOO

- i love scary too doodler.

- THE DOODLER SAYING "FUCK U WILLY" YIPPEEE

- NORMAL W A BROADWAY PERFORMANCE OKAY learning from hermie i see

- i also dont like it when normal gets hurt lmao

- the doodler is the realest character on the podcast /hj

- SCARYS GONNA ATTACK WILLY!!!!!

- nooo it didnt work... that wouldve been so satisfying

- WILLYS PANTS ARE STILL DOWN I CANT BELIEVE THIS

- THE FACT THAT WILL IS SO LOST ON WHAT TO DO SCARES ME

- NOOOO THE DOODLERS GETTING UPSET FUCK. THE FUCKING ZONE OF TRUTH

- i totally forgot the kiddads were there oops

- OH NOOO WILLYS CALLING FOR HELP

- im so sorry but. when am i gonna hear hermie LMAOO

- OKAY THERE THEY ARE YIPPEE

- OH WOW YEAH HERMIE IS IN THE ZONE OF TRUTH HUH. just like i said i wanted lol. forgot about that

- HERMIE W THE BEST FUCKING ROLL OF THE EPISODE SO FAR LMAO

- NOOOO WILLY HAS CONTROL OVER THE DOODLER NOW

- WILL DECIDING THAT INSTEAD OF NORMAL GIVING A HEARTFELT SPEECH TO THE DOODLER HE JUST VIOLENTLY ATTACKS WILLY. THIS IS DEFINITELY SOME CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

- MATT JUST TOTALLY FUCKED ANTHONY OVER WOW

- WILLY IS NO LONGER SCARYS PATRON. I REPEAT. WILLY IS NO LONGER SCARYS FUCKING PATRON

- OH MY GOD WERE GONNA GET THE DOODLER IN A NEW PHYSICAL FORM. OH MY GOD ITS HAPPENING

- this is very upsetting good lord

- OHHHH MY GOD I REALLY HOPE THIS IS SOMETHING COOL IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

- my heart is POUNDING.

- THE SKY IS BLUE AGAIN

- WHOOOOA THEY ALL SEE THE DOODLER AS THEIR OWN INSECURITIES THATS SICK

- LARK DONT U FUCKING DARE

- THE DOODLER IS A SPIDERBOI NOW!!!!

- awww the doodler and the catbus

- NOT ANOTHER COLLAR

- "oh u kind man u" IM SCREAMING

- ANTHONY JUST CALLED LARK NORMALS DAD

- WILL HAVING HIS CHARACTER TALK TO LARK ABOUT HENRY WHAT IF I DIED.

- "dont make me hate u as much as u hate him" OH. MY FUCKING GOD OW

- "oh sparrows also there" I. ANTHONY

- INFINITY WAR BUT ITS GRIMACE INSTEAD OF THANOS IM CRYING

- WILLYS JUST GIVING UP???

- SO IS THE DOODLER JUST GONNA BE A PART OF THEIR PARTY AS THEIR BUDDY. THIS IS SO EXCITING

- THEIR NAME IS DUDE NOW?? OMG

- NEW CHARACTER LETS GOOOO

- MATTS CHARACTER SHAKING HANDS W THE DOODLER. ITS ALL COMING FULL CIRCLE WOWIE

- RON???!?!!?!!

- FUCKIFN RON STAMPLER????

- HES DEAD. RON STAMPLER IS OFFICIALLY DEAD.

- OH IM GONNA CRY THIS IS SO

- WOW. THAT EPISODE WAS SHORT BUT WOW

[lloydfrontera]

lloyd really went FUCK THEM COUPLES lmaooooo

also LOVED ppodong sneaking into lloyd's pocket bc he wanted to see seoul!! this is why he's his favorite kid! the others would NEVER! i wonder how the police felt about the two criminals absconding on a giant hamster tho. they'll be memes for ages!!

HE DID LMAOO

well if javier was gonna go with lloyd then it was only fair that ppodong did too! he was so sneaky!!

oh man there's gonna be so many theories about it lmao they'll be one of those unsolved mysteries that people talk and meme about aksldjksa i do love that lloyd said "not my universe not my problem peace out ✌🏽" lol

[stormoflina]

Call me selfish but I want all the boys just to rest and not play international. City players always magically pull out of international for injury and then are suddenly fit for premier league games

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

im with you, anon 😭 especially with our South American players with the upcoming Copa América.

as a south american myself, it would be wise if they didn't travel (while it would be amazing to win la Copa, i don't expect my country to get too far in the tournament cause my dearest Lucho cannot do everything by himself) cause shit gets ugly reallyyyy fast in our football. players over here loooooooove their dirty tackles especially those from certain countries that know that they can get away with many things cause they are more successful than others (just like certain countries in other regions lol). many of our matches are aggressive and borderline violent when you see how hard they play each other even without dirty tackles 💀

i will never forget Copa América 2015 and 2016, those two tournaments were filled with fights almost every single match. competitiveness here seems to jump straight from normal competitiveness to violence within like 5 minutes of the game starting lmao.

i remember one Colombia vs. Brazil match ended in a fight after tensions just kept rapidly rising as the match progressed. the whole thing exploded when Neymar kicked the ball just so it could hit a Colombian player and in retaliation a Colombian player came running and pushed Neymar which only helped to make things go even crazier. the whole thing became a meme and many were kinda happy cause goddamn, Neymar was so fucking annoying during that tournament 💀 (not that he has changed tbh, he seems to be getting worse as he gets older).

and oh my god, while this specific moment was not really aggressive or anything, there was this one match (Chile vs. Uruguay) where a Chilean player put a finger up an Uruguayan player's ass (Cavani, out of all people 😭) and the one who got sent off was Cavani after he lightly slapped the other guy and he, as football players do, dramatically fell to the ground holding his face as if he had just gotten punched within an inch of his life. However, the match as a whole was aggressive as hell. Crazy match tbh.

later, the whole thing got reviewed and the Chilean player got suspended for like three matches lmaoo. some look at him or hear his name and go "oooh, that's the guy that put his finger up Cavani's ass".

i remember watching that match with my family and we all just looked at each other all confused cause "did that guy really put his finger up Cavani's ass??? 👁️👁️" and then got mad when Cavani got sent off as if we were Uruguayans cause no one but Chileans were rooting for Chile during that tournament lmaooo.

- long ass rant anon with south american gossip lolololol 🇨🇴

My lovely anon, thank you so much for providing the South-American gossip, this was so amusing to read!!

I confess, I don’t watch a lot of South American football, but when I do, it always leaves an everlasting impression lol. Those players truly play football like they are in war, but hey, violence can be entertaining - especially if the drama is not happening to your favorites, but rather rivals haha. I’m so afraid of this international break, ngl, my favourite ever player is finally back from injury in our nt after 1,5 years and I just know if he goes down even with the lightest tackle I will be clutching my pearls lol. And of course with Domi too, or any players really. They also suffer from the passion disease and act like they are fighting for our country’s independence or something. It’s just a friendly, please protect yourself!!

And hahah, no, I actually remember the Cavani ass touching incident. I didn’t see the whole match but rather the videos and meme after that haha, crazy stuff. Which countries are the favoured ones in your opinion? I'm nosey and live for the drama 😭

[eviltiddyprodnz]

xo kitty: episode 2

aww kitty

the teacher should've just gone to the loo 💀 'why are you not dae'

lmfaooo wait i think she just made him her boyfriend for her mom. ( I thought this was going to happen but then just assumed the worst of dae 💀)

she is dating Julianna after all. saving your girlfriend's name as baby when your parents might not approve is pretty balsy tbh. my girl back at 99%

my mind going ↗️↖️⬆️⬇️ trying to comprehend what the fuck this teacher kitty conversation is supposed to be here for

who wrote the dialogues. what are these conversations. 💀 * Kitty walks in * the guy who had seventeen hot playing in the background 'this girl treats Korean guys like Pokemons' huh !???

Where did that even come from. random and unprovoked lmaooo like they've not had a single conversation.

lmaoo poor kitty. but all of this feels so anti climatic.

dae has sad puppy eyes but like at least text kitty 😭😭😭 like tell her what's up.

even kitty is being so chill about this lmao. he's getting clicked with another girl and she's having a monologue best saved for episode 3 🤣 okay i guess

I KNEW THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN as soon as I saw food on the table I knew she was going to crash into it but why now 😭

I was about to say slayyy but she just slipped and fell. let me settle open my embarrassment bag.

the way her entire class is about to know about all this. my girl <///3

I'm just going to accept their 0 emotion answers at this point 💀 like how is everything already settled and okay. not even a voice crack in sight

he looks more broken than her 💀

dae's eating it up!!!

aww Kitty 🥺 she's kinda handling it like a champ. let me give her a hug.

lmfaooo why did Q's entire dialogue sound like voice over. what is happening in the production of this show

Dae is the only one acting here 😭

let the wattapad games begin 🤩

at least she scared them away

now Minho sounds like he did a voice over 😭😭😭 why is the dialogue delivery and editing so weird here.

everyone sounds normal now

Minho 💀🤣 i want to say get over yourself but the 'she did this to be closer to Dae AND ME' kinda got me laughing

Minho's accent changed 80 times. Is he British???

she says she doesn't want to talk but you clearly have to?? 💀 I feel like in these moments one should simply just scream the answer ' not cheating cheating on you babe****'

not her being in Dae's room too this could've actually been fun 😭

this is just badly written and boring like at least them in the same room would've been fun!!!

Is Minho Australian or British. Let me Google. A little bit of British in there! also Yuri is his sister irl 💀

Q being real rn. American people will tell you to follow your heart!

Dae is wearing that necklace!!!

I'm sorry but a little scroll through my blogs and you'll know someone wearing a necklace or a ring in a necklace their partner gave them is my kryptonite.

he's acting so well that i am currently rooting for him

lmfao Minho trying to cuddle Dae. #real

not a single emotion in this show is translating through the screen 😔

awww he's sleeping by her door. it's giving puppy, it's giving love, it's giving give me a chance to explain and I'm eating it up 😭

Kitty don't leave your suitcase just on the damn road like that 😭😭😭 the cherry blossom is beautiful but please keep an eye out for your bag!

her mom wants her to stay here maybe idk 🤩

this show is so quiet I'm so serious. not a worry, not an emotion. it's just there. minho's a little funny though.

and she's gone and dae left in the quietest way possible 💀

Dae about to have the worst semester of his life because Yuri's mom will keep them together hence keeping him from Kitty check ✔️

Yuri staring her dad with an open mouth after making that lettuce meme (slay!) if these weren't just consequences of her own actions 😭

Dae running to find his girl in pyjamas. Adorable and real

the kiss that didn't happen was the closest we got to emotions and his dad is here to get him now 😔

they're about to make him sign an NDA my man is GONE

I feel like she could've probably seen the resignation and desperation on his face but she's right to be angry for as long as she likes so I move.

if she choose Minho over Dae, how am I not supposed to feel bad for Dae 💀 once again money ruining things !!!

She clocked in that he's miserable!

this is so unserious why are teenagers having to talk about their relationship

Dae having the worst week of his life, my poor bb. I have decided to adopt him

[lovelyrecs]

wowowow ari i won't lie i read through the entirety of this two days ago while i was half asleep in bed and i loved it so much. definitely seeing what captured me so very deeply with harmless and i enjoyed it SO much. now i will do what i was too sleep to and reblog PROPERLY. your memes btw. huge fan. huuuuge fan like i cannot, i slept and i dreamt some of them no joke

“Your numbers are the lowest of the whole team.” The latest tech-dude, with a tablet twelve models ahead of the one Bucky had in his room, tells him monotonously. “Wilson, Romanoff and Barton score the highest. Everyone else lies around the middle. You are dead-last.”

of course they do and of course he is. sam is kind and funny and would actually talk to his fans, nat is cool and scary and they like the intrigue and clint is insane

“I don’ care,” he mumbles. 

HELP ME the wittiest one liner he could come up with is a three-year old's snotty mumble. matches up.

“No one’s gonna listen to me.” Bucky wasn’t exactly the poster child for American values. He couldn’t even vote until three years ago, and that came only after the full wrath of a Steve Rogers descended on the email inbox of the DMV. 

this is very sad to me. however, the image of steve rogers hunched over a tiny laptop, angrily typing an email to the dmv is very very nice. but not nearly as nice as him later on going to the actual dmv, waiting in the long ass line with his arms crossed and then talking sternly to the clerks and etc while bucky stands behind him silently

“The team agreed to do a series of videos, each focusing on a different niche,” she begins, “Crash courses on science, pointing out mistakes in spy movies. Once a week.” Bucky nods along. He can pinpoint Bruce and Nat for those.

THAT WOULD BE SO

Maya is sick and tired, and the interns have shifted three times since the whole ordeal started. Bucky honestly feels a little bad. Maybe he should try to be like Scott, who not only wrote a book, finger-gunned at photographers, did an interview a week, but also agreed to a podcast and a video series about literally anything they suggested. 

scott!!! he WOULD and i would gobble it all up. i love that man. he's the people's princess and every time the interns get to work with him they let out a collective sigh of relief

They stick him in the background of a few videos. Just to interact, add his commentary on what was going on, suggestions. 

THE BACKGROUND??? LIKE A CRYPTID?? the content he will give is my profile picture-esque. just a blurry very petulant small face

Maya’s in the midst of explaining to him that sure, his numbers had gone up by a decimal, but that was because people had started editing him into the backgrounds of other pictures for other users to find in a perplexing take on Where’s Waldo.

LMAOO i have to say, though, what works works

For the next thirty minutes, he is subjected to a pop quiz about too many words ending with ‘core’, ‘coded’ and ‘eras’. He’s surprised that he knows what cottagecore is. He definitely doesn’t fucking know what a tomatogirl, nor does he want to. 

ari is that an actual thing that exists

Beyond that, the only thing he can think of is woodworking, which Sam introduced him to. While he spends time creating little figures, he wouldn’t say it was– 

THAT'S SO SWEET STOP IT I NEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT HIS LITTLE FIGURES

“Back to what we were talking about.” She ruffles through something on her laptop. “Puppets? History?”

PUPPET HISTORY also imagine if he'd said yes to puppets

“Whatever it is you think I did, Maya, I didn’t. I think,” you announce in a volume too much for a closed room, stopping when you see Bucky sitting cross-armed and looking delightfully disgruntled. “Oh hey, Barnes. Fancy seeing you here.”

IMAGINE THE AUDIENCE CHEERING LIKE IN A SITCOM. SHE'S BACK OH MY GOD DEAR READER

“Oh, am I finally getting hard launched?” You grin, and Bucky doesn’t know what that means. “Just imagine me kicking my feet, giggling or whatever.” 

HELP ME she's so me

“Do you know what skinwalkers are?”  “No.” “That’s what they say you look like, lurking in the back of all your friends’ videos,” you continue, swerving around your phone to show him.

I CANNOT THEY (you) MAKE MEMES OF HIM WHERE HE'S THE SKINWALKER LMAOO also like how she didn't expand at all like you get what you get suck it up you can use context clues “At least they’re calling you their boyfriend,” you add, entirely unhelpfully. “That’s gotta count.”

she's right, you have to look at the bright side. skinwalker bucky boyfriend. small wins.

Maya pointedly raises a finger at you. “Do you believe in ghosts?” “For the right price, I will believe in whatever you tell me to.” Her face lights up brighter than Bucky's ever seen.

i love her <3 also very clever way of leaving it open for readers ari u are a genius

“Fine,” he agrees and the sighs around the room are loud.  He scoffs. So fucking dramatic and for what.

LMAO why is he such a problem child and then pretends he doesn't know that. bucky barnes you make a conscious effort to be a little shit

ari shurisneakers you have done it again. live in my brain.

unsolved (i)

Summary: Bucky doesn't even believe in the paranormal. So who the hell thought it was a good idea to stick him in a series about everything haunted for the internet's amusement? With his loose-canon of a teammate who has no concept of subtlety or any shits left to give, to make things even worse. (Buzzfeed unsolved AU)

Warnings: swearing, frustrated bucky at his little shit supreme, Very Loud reader, images and memes that all have alt texts.

A/N: yes this is literally harmless in a different font. do not ask me if anything doesn't make sense. i cannot explain. i resurface every 3 years to present you with ideas born from menty b's. ANYWAY shout out to my beloved ryan and shane. pls enjoy <3

Bucky doesn’t appeal to the youths.

Apparently. 

On God, he cannot fathom why.

He had definitely left the house in the last six months, maybe. Smiled in at least two pictures that existed on the internet. He even knew what Discord was. Sort of.  

By all accounts, he should be treated as the modern day icon that he was.  

“The youths?” he repeats, the word so foreign on his tongue it felt odd to even say it.

“Your numbers are the lowest of the whole team.” The latest tech-dude, with a tablet twelve models ahead of the one Bucky had in his room, tells him monotonously. “Wilson, Romanoff and Barton score the highest. Everyone else lies around the middle. You are dead-last.”

Bucky has the audacity to look offended. 

“Anything to say?” Their PR head, Maya, asks him, amused. 

He stares, formulating the wittiest one liner he could in three seconds.

“I don’ care,” he mumbles. 

Maya sighs. “Look, the team took the decision together. As far as I’m aware, you are still a member. You need some PR if you guys want to stay in the public’s good books.”

“No one’s gonna listen to me.” Bucky wasn’t exactly the poster child for American values. He couldn’t even vote until three years ago, and that came only after the full wrath of a Steve Rogers descended on the email inbox of the DMV. 

“That’s why it’s important to get them to like you,” Maya emphasizes. “Or the idea of you at least. A very sanitized, corporate friendly version.”

His eyebrow twitches unintentionally.  

“And also you signed the contract.”

Well. Shit. 

Truth be told– and he has openly and rather loudly stated this on numerous occasions even especially when no one asked– he doesn’t understand why they need a PR team. The world has calmed down significantly over the last few years. Bucky hadn’t really been out crime-fighting as much as he was people-watching. There hasn’t been an earth-shatteringly dystopian-level event in the longest time, and there seemed to be a group of spandex-clad teenagers who seemed to do a good job at taking care of them when they did threaten to occur. Go kids.

Even if they needed PR, he could arguably understand the appeal of Sam and Nat and why the people would want to see more of them. Bucky, on the other hand, looked like he crawled onto Earth most days of the week. 

“What do I have to do?” he asks ultimately, knowing there was no way to get out of this. “Interviews?”

The intern shares a look with Maya. Bucky shares a look with the ceiling. 

“The team agreed to do a series of videos, each focusing on a different niche,” she begins, “Crash courses on science, pointing out mistakes in spy movies. Once a week.”

Bucky nods along. He can pinpoint Bruce and Nat for those.

Maya stares at him.

Bucky stares back.

“So,” she says slowly, like he’s a moron, “you would–”

“No.” 

The intern sighs heavily like they discussed that this was going to happen. Bucky was getting predictable. This annoys him even further, for some reason.

“Only once a week, and it doesn’t have to be anything crazy–”

“I’m not doing videos,” he interjects. “I’ll tweet a few times. I’ll even go outside. But ’m not doin’ videos.”

A big step was to get the Avengers off Twitter after the regular shit-storm that occurs every time they’d quote-tweet another politician calling them shitheads. Getting them back on seems counterproductive. 

“Fine,” Maya relents, looking at the intern. “We'll work something out.”

Bucky leans back in his chair, and meditating on ways he can weasel his way out of those too.

So they stick him in a couple of interviews.

Bucky, as the recluse extraordinaire that he was, does unsurprisingly terrible at them.

Variety does a piece on him that was supposed to take up 2 pages. They send back half a page worth of usable material and Bucky gets a lecture on how monosyllables don't count as answers.

He grunts in return. Maya’s itch to smack his shoulder with the rolled up draft increases.

They set him up for pap walks. Just him getting fast food for the team, or sitting in the park.

They don’t take into account that Bucky was trained professionally for years on how to hide, sneak in and out of places without a soul knowing he was ever there. 

The paparazzi spend three hours waiting for him outside the pizza place, while he’s been home for two hours with two demolished pepperonis and an order of mozzarella sticks. 

They give him access to his Twitter. 

He tweets some dumb shit and gets shadow banned by that evening. 

Maya is sick and tired, and the interns have shifted three times since the whole ordeal started. Bucky honestly feels a little bad. Maybe he should try to be like Scott, who not only wrote a book, finger-gunned at photographers, did an interview a week, but also agreed to a podcast and a video series about literally anything they suggested. 

“Play nice,” Sam tells Bucky one evening. 

It’s an off-hand comment, not even really looking at him while he says it. 

Bucky doesn’t need to ask what he’s referring to, but he thinks that maybe he has gone too far.

He begrudgingly agrees. 

Therefore, it begins. 

They stick him in the background of a few videos. Just to interact, add his commentary on what was going on, suggestions. 

Then the jokes really start.

“I just don’t got anything to add,” Bucky tries, in a failure of an attempt to justify his lack of contribution. 

Maya only stares at him, but Bucky swears he can hear her curse quietly, even though her lips don’t move even a millimeter.  

He is not put in another video. 

And so he finds himself here. 

In a meeting room that he’s convinced is barricaded from the outside so he can’t slither out the door again. Another intern with pink-tinted glasses that took up half their face.

Maya’s in the midst of explaining to him that sure, his numbers had gone up by a decimal, but that was because people had started editing him into the backgrounds of other pictures for other users to find in a perplexing take on Where’s Waldo.

“Videos seem to be working,” she ties it together. “But we need more than you just standing silently behind Captain Rogers.”

“But it’s working,” Bucky objects. “I don’t see why it has to change.”

Maya sends him a glare. Bucky decides then it’s good to shut up. 

“Are you on the internet a significant amount?” the intern asks. The glasses on their face have changed colours to green. Bucky’s eyebrow furrows. 

“No.” 

For the next thirty minutes, he is subjected to a pop quiz about too many words ending with ‘core’, ‘coded’ and ‘eras’. He’s surprised that he knows what cottagecore is. He definitely doesn’t fucking know what a tomatogirl, nor does he want to. 

“What do you like doing?” the intern enunciates, pulling up a spreadsheet of niches that had built a dedicated community around themselves over the years. “Makeup? Cleaning? Parkour?”

Bucky wonders if they’d really create a montage of him just micro cleaning the kitchen every week. It doesn’t sound half bad. 

Beyond that, the only thing he can think of is woodworking, which Sam introduced him to. While he spends time creating little figures, he wouldn’t say it was– 

“You really are dead silent,” the intern breaks his train of thought, tone almost that of wonder. “Guess the whole ‘ghost story for seventy years’ is more true than I thought.”

Bucky throws him a weary look, and works on unclenching the fist that tightened involuntarily. 

“Was that necessary?” Maya’s voice comes coldly. “Take fifteen. Go find the other one we were supposed to meet.”

While sheepish and somewhat apologetic, the kid still looks relieved to be out of there. To be honest, Bucky isn’t really offended– he’s grown a thick skin over the years. But he also thought the guy was a little shit now. 

Maya turns back to him, but Bucky finds that the table contains wonders far more interesting than the conversation at hand.

“Back to what we were talking about.” She ruffles through something on her laptop. “Puppets? History?”

He wordlessly shakes his head. 

Been the former, seen too much of the latter.

Maya’s head tilts abruptly. “You like ghosts?”  

He wonders if the prior conversation had anything to do with this insightful question. 

Bucky shrugs. “Don’t exist.”

“Really,” Maya deadpans. “Aliens and multiversal baboons are fine, but no ghosts.”

“I’ve seen aliens and multiversal baboons. Never seen a ghost in my life,” Bucky argues right back.

“Other people have seen ghosts.”

“Good for other people.”

The door swings open right as Maya’s eyes narrow at him. Guess it wasn’t padlocked. 

“Whatever it is you think I did, Maya, I didn’t. I think,” you announce in a volume too much for a closed room, stopping when you see Bucky sitting cross-armed and looking delightfully disgruntled. “Oh hey, Barnes. Fancy seeing you here.”

Bucky had met you. The newest addition to the team that had made a grand entrance a couple of weeks ago. He thinks you stay on the floor below him, but he has nothing backing this hypothesis other than the disco funk music that had started appearing at odd hours of the night. 

“Please sit,” Maya cracks a smile at you that Bucky had yet to earn. “Sorry, I know our meeting is scheduled for later, but I figured we could kill two birds with one stone.”

You look between her and Bucky, who hasn’t moved an inch since you got here, much less even said hello.

“You must be really bad if Maya had to call me in,” you tell him outright. “I’m usually like, her last option.”

“Thanks,” Bucky replies dryly. 

“Look, here’s my final pitch.” Maya sighs, before turning to you. “You’re new, and we need something to introduce you slowly to the public.”

“Oh, am I finally getting hard launched?” You grin, and Bucky doesn’t know what that means. “Just imagine me kicking my feet, giggling or whatever.” 

“And he needs… an upgrade.” Maya’s thumb juts out towards Bucky who simply rolls his eyes.

“Right.” Your sight lands on him from across the table. “I’ve seen the memes.”

“What memes?” he grunts, because while the team had definitely seen them, it didn't occur to anyone they should show it to him. He loves them. Really. So much. Die for them. 

You only look too happy to pull out your phone and start typing.

“Do you know what skinwalkers are?” 

“No.”

“That’s what they say you look like, lurking in the back of all your friends’ videos,” you continue, swerving around your phone to show him.

Bucky doesn’t look impressed. He can’t say he blames them either, which makes him inexplicably maddens him.  

“At least they’re calling you their boyfriend,” you add, entirely unhelpfully. “That’s gotta count.”

“Right.” Maya clears her throat. “The both of you–” 

“Are getting paired together, I suppose,” you hum. 

Bucky’s eyebrows pull together. 

He barely knows you. Just a little bit on how you ended up here, that you enjoyed hanging out with the team, figuring out your place in the compound, and were seemingly doing a great job at it. 

You were… loud. And open. 

Bucky feels the compulsive need to compensate for that by doubling down on how silent he could get, as if the two of you couldn’t co-exist in the same space in equilibrium. 

Maya pointedly raises a finger at you. “Do you believe in ghosts?”

“For the right price, I will believe in whatever you tell me to.”

Her face lights up brighter than Bucky's ever seen.

“Great.” Maya slams her laptop closed. “See you later.”

Bucky’s left staring as she exits, not even throwing the both of you another look.

“That was quick,” your voice cuts through the silence. “What was that all about?”

 “Don’ ask me,” he grumbles, with a sinking feeling that he knew exactly what was about to follow. 

“Ghost hunting?” Bucky echoes a week later, as expected.

“Yes,” Maya tells him simply. “Two of you. A series based on paranormal activity.”

“I don’t even believe in them,” he reiterates. 

“That’s the point,” she emphasises. “Skeptic and believer. It makes for a good contrast.”

“Why us both?” He hopes it doesn’t come off as offensive. He just doesn’t see why he can’t do this with Sam. Even Clint, if a gun was really pressed to his head. 

“I’m new, no one gives a shit about me,” you say brightly and full of promise. “Yet.”

“Exactly. It’ll be low key. Not an overwhelming number of viewers, no expectations. It’s perfect for launching one Avenger and re-launching another.”

“Sounds rad.” You grin, leaning back as your feet rest on the chair in front of you.

Maya looks relieved for a moment that at least one of you was on board. “No promises on anything. We shoot one video, and if it does well, we stick with it.”

“What if I don’t want to?” Bucky argues. 

“Then you have until tomorrow morning to give us another feasible idea,” Maya dishes back.

Bucky retreats into his seat, arms crossed over his chest. 

Truth be told, he considered himself to be the most boring person in the team and though he had made his peace with that, he was sure thar bringing that up now would entail Maya shooting him in the foot.

“Fine,” he agrees and the sighs around the room are loud. 

He scoffs. So fucking dramatic and for what.

“Put her there, partner.” You stretch ungracefully over the large table, sticking out your hand.

Bucky eyes your hand. “Do you even believe in ghosts?” 

“I do now, yeah.” You nod seriously. “Love ‘em. Can’t get enough of them.”

“One video,” Maya reminds him as a balm. “And if it doesn’t work, you’re off the hook forever.”

Off the hook? Forever? For Bucky?

Yay. 

“One video,” he reiterates.

You roll your eyes before smiling when he leans forward to grab it. You yank it up and down clunkily. He blinks at you, letting go slowly. 

“Thank fuck,” Maya groans, head dropping onto the table. 

Your smile is wild. “Guess we’re doing this shit together.”

He doesn’t even have to look very deep in his soul. He already knows he’s going to suffer.

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing!

to keep up with updates for this fic and others, please follow @shurisneakersupdates and turn on post notifications!

also i'd absolutely love to make this a community led fic like how harmless was! if you have memes or any paranormal ideas or just any prompts in general, please please send them my way <3

Next part

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Ok wait sorry I fell off the face of the earth came back from food poisoning then got jumpscared by grass and then a friend dragged me into binging a new piece of media so my tumblr account has been collecting DUST but I’m back (barring anymore spontaneous grass sessions sigh)!!

I also lowk cannot find the original mega convo and quite frankly don’t remember what we talked about so SINCEREST APOLOGIES SHDHSJS I’m just gonna start a fresh convo but if you remember anything pressing from the last one do let me know….

ok wait I did see one of shorter ones and LMFAOOAOA miraculous is so fucking funny all the memes online too about it are actual gold…surprisingly enough I actually have a good handful of irls who watched it and we lowkey watched it together and I can’t lie it’s goofy as hell and I don’t think I’ve EVER gotten more secondhand embarrassment than when I watched that show but the drama had my friends and I really truly a good watch for when you need a laugh or something like slightly lighter

But anyways HOW HAVE YOU BEEN SHEHDKDB hoping your freedom era starts soon if it hasn’t already!!

Also THOUGHTS on any of the latest bllk content omg yuki looked fire in the like two seconds he appeared in the latest episode also I literally fucking cannot with the Shidou scene WHY DID THEY ADD THOSE EXTRA SCENES is this truly where our budget went….

I also saw your hollyhock post and I’m laughing about all the chain reblogs with you being like “I forgot.” LMFOAOA that’s literally me with like every thought but omg HOLLYHOCK COMEBACK??? MAYBE???

- Karasu anon

LMAOO it’s okay i’m glad you’re back though!! also ooh new piece of media?? if you liked it def drop the name or smth because i suddenly have a lot of time on my hands #winterbreak and i would love to watch/read smth new 😫

HAHHA no i forget what we were talking abt too and it’s been a while so it would be a lottt of scrolling to reach it again 😭 i don’t really think there was anything too important?? i’m sure if there was it’ll come up again

it’s just such a ridiculous show honestly like nothing abt it feels real somehow…it was funny but sometimes too cringy fr like i do think it gets worse as it goes on in terms of secondhand embarrassment and i only got through season one so i can’t even claim to say i know abt most of the story but there were def some crazy moments 😓 the tik tok audios from it are crazy though they always go hard

I HAVE BEEN GOODDDD finally on winter break and done with finals so bless up for that!! i’ve mostly been catching up with my hometown friends and whatnot so not much writing time yet but trust as soon as things settle down i’ll get to work (the sae one shot is already 10k words so i have been working it’s just getting reallyyyy long)

YUKI LOOKED SO GOOD wait speaking of shidou i saw such a good edit of him earlier let me find the link (edit: okay wait it’s really popular now so you may have seen it already but it was super low on views when i saved it #aheadofthecurve anyways here) the nagi cameos have been getting me through fr though and BAROUUUU UGH HE LOOKED SO GOOD I CANNOT WAIT FOR HIS GOAL BYE THAT’S GOING TO MAKE MY ENTIRE LIFE ESPECIALLYYYYY IF THEY GIVE IT THAT SHIDOU AND NAGI TREATMENT

erm so when i said i was nuking it i meant it was getting cut FJFJJD it’s gone now sadly i just have other things to be working on and it fell so far to the wayside that i didn’t want the clutter 😭 so hollyhock comeback = never 💔 getting the otoya and y/n treatment fr (dead)

[majorbitchwillgraham]

I just finished another semester and so many things have happened

I have surrendered to loneliness and comp het and have fucked this guy 3 times

Well... the first we made out, the 2nd we almost had sex in his car and the 3rd we had sex

I really thought ok this is it I am bisexual? But then when we had sex I didn't feel a thing lmaoo. Maybe I am still a lesbian

Ok but who could this guy be to convince me to have sex? An ISTP guy ... oh my god. Well they are something for sure. I had never had anything with an ISTP

Last semester I was thinking how I like ESTPs so much ... well I also like ISTPs so much loll so far the only guy to convince me to have sex

ESTP psychopath is also very hot to this day but something is missing (he needs to shut up) and also he is a literal psychpath and he would sell photos of me naked, continue to manipulate me and maybe murder me one day lmaooo

Ah.. my first and only girl crush has been ISTP btw. I had no idea, I have no idea ever of what I like. Until it happens

So no...

However 1 year later ESTP psychopath still likes me. No other guy who has hit on me has looked at me like that. Like he doesnt just want sex. And his friend told me he was talking about me. But all he does is lie and manipulate me. Literal hannibal lecter

Also my closest friend here now is ISTP too. Such a sweetheart actually I love him so much. And ESTP psychopath is jealous of him bc we spend a lot of tme together loll

Oh but the ISTP guy who is..friends with benefits... is actually 10 years younger than me oh well, and an idiot with no creativity at all. I'm getting fond of him as friend, not gonna lie. He is stupid and I find that funny.

On the 3rd day we were in his car and I flirtes with him saying "oh you are already hard.." and he goes "it's always hard" lmao what is that, the hulk meme? Gjdjsk

Anyways. I even considered that if I could do it with many guys and charge money for it I would do it. How things change

So 2 ISTPs my closest friend and the guy I have fucked. I found really great mbti fanart that reminds me of us, so here it is...

Me and my friend:

Me and guy who I have had sex with:

I had no idea this was a great ship

[haegeumi]

god, how i love pathetic men

mc is kind of a bitch like you said, but i feel her LMAO. the avoidance of conflict and facing her feelings is very realistic tbh,, like same. i love your mcs they aren't mary sue-esque ever — they feel like real people and i love it (ik that i said this last time i just wanna reiterate it)

NOW FOR YEONJUN,,, bro is on his knees, groveling in the rain just for a chance to talk, and all his attempts to do so were so funny??? all he wants is for her not to be mad at him :((( cutest frat boy himbo ever :((((( i wanna bite him honestly. also the way he got the other boys involved had me rolling — like ofc he fucking did 😭 she can't ever escape him

(the whole "can you forgive me?" "for what?" "for existing." sequence had me dying too HDJSJFJ)

the whole smut scene made me feel some type of way,,,, phew. that unlocked something within me. the way she degrades and mocks him had me giggling and kicking my mf feet — that rocked my shit fr ‼️‼️‼️ i love how he thought they broke up LMAOO bro is just so stupid i love him 💔💔 AND THEN HE ASKS TO EAT HER OUT??? don't talk to me he is so himbo boyfriend 💔💔💔

sol this is so good i am obsessed,,, you have done it once again. you have destroyed me. i will not be able to function for the rest of the day because now all i can think of his having a dumb himbo bf 🫠 idk how you bang out 10k words of excellence so quickly but you are genuinely a legend for it...thank you for writing this. take a meme

love fool ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

♫: Seven, Jungkook // Lovefool, The Cardigans // I only want to be with you, Tommy february6

“In which Yeonjun is more than willing to show you the lengths he’ll go for you.”

yeonjun x fem!reader

Genre: established relationship, inspired by “Seven” mv, fluff, angst, smut

Word count: 10.6K

warnings: don’t take this story seriously pls. it’s ridiculous. yj is clingy. and emotional. and a bit pathetic. the mc is avoidant… and a bit of a bitch ! Lack of communication smh, a bit toxic if u squint ur eyes but it’s supposed to be cute idk (seven mv type toxic skdjdj) yj is a frat boy & a himbo (pick a struggle, pls), arguing, mc has acrylic nails, use of the phrase “boyfriend-girlfriend” bc i’m obsessed w it

smut warnings: mean dom!mc, sub!yj, (mentions of dom!yj) service top!yj, unprotected sex, manhandling (m. rec), hairpulling, name calling, (bitch, stupid, slut, etc) pet names (baby, good boy), dry humping, biting, marking, scent kink (?), scratching, dumbification, dacryphilia, forced orgasm (kinda), multiple orgasms, overstimulation, yj rambles. a lot. breast play, handjob, humiliation, creampie, subspace, implied oral (f. rec) (lemme know if i should add anything!)

Notes: fucking hate arguing with men w/ pretty puppy eyes like i will fuck the shit outta y-

Yeonjun hates when you’re mad at him. It makes him feel guilty and leaves him with a gross feeling in his stomach, pouty and annoying as his friends are always left to deal with the mess. 

It doesn’t happen often— he tries his hardest not to make you mad, always saying yes and going above and beyond with you— he loves to please you and make you happy, which is exactly why it hits harder when you look at him like you never want to see him again. 

“I don’t want to see you around, don’t talk to me!”

But sometimes, he just can’t help it. 

He seriously doesn’t know what he did wrong— there were no anniversaries forgotten, no plans he stood you up on, no petty arguments— and yet, here he sits, sinking into his couch and burrowed in blankets as his friends try to get him to come out of his cocoon, all with no success.

“Is she mad at you again?” Beomgyu asks, his voice muffled despite sitting on top of Yeonjun— literally, he couldn’t feel his legs— and he hears him groan at the sight of Yeonjun nodding under the mass of blankets, cursing quietly to himself and undoubtedly rolling his eyes, “dude, what did you do?”

“I don’t knowww,” Yeonjun cries out, throwing the blankets off him and onto Beomgyu as he whines— he watches as Beomgyu flails about for a second, running his hands through his hair as he continues to stress about you, “she— she said she didn’t wanna see me again, but I miss her…”

“Fuck, she’s probably just saying that because she wants space— dude, are you crying?”

“What if she was breaking up with me?” Yeonjun asks, and Beomgyu is amazed to see the way his wide eyes are welling up with tears; god, he’s actually crying now, the sight childish and unhinged as he watches his (older) friend sniffle and hiccup through his sentences, “what if— what if she— she, she, she really meant it— god, I don’t wanna break up, I don’t even know what I did wronggg!”

“Okay, okay,” Beomgyu grimaces, watching the way his friend breaks down before his eyes; his hand is stiff and awkward as it pats Yeonjun’s back, trying his best to comfort him, wincing at the way Yeonjun only cries harder, “It’s… probably nothing, I’m sure she’ll talk to you again tomorrow, or once she’s calmed down.”

“You think?” Yeonjun asks, peeking through his hands and up at Beomgyu with sparkling eyes, full of hope as Beomgyu can only crack a nervous smile.

“Yeah,” he says, patting Yeonjun’s back again in reassurance, “Yeah— just, be patient, okay?”

Patient is the last word one would use to describe Yeonjun. 

-ˏˋ♡ˊˎ-

MONDAY

This is it. 

Yeonjun has been waiting all weekend for this moment (Or just Sunday, to be more accurate), restless on his feet as he finds himself pacing back and forth— he’s nibbling at his lip nervously, arms sore and tired from the weight of the gift he holds in his hands; a bouquet of your favorite flowers, pristine and in full bloom— it’s large and quite heavy as it practically covers his face, but Yeonjun knew that a small bouquet would do nothing to show his love for you. 

He would try to talk to you as soon as your class ended. He needed to know what he did wrong, and he sure as hell would not do it again. You didn’t text him after the argument, and it only left him uneasy at the thought of you really wanting to end things.

He didn’t want to lose you. Not like this. 

Admittedly, he got a bit ahead of himself— he’s been waiting outside for the past half hour, arriving much too early as he stood out in the hall awkwardly— at some point, he tried peeking into the small, rectangular window next to the door, hunched over slightly and pouting as he scanned the room for you. 

When he spotted you, he was delighted to see you had already been looking at him. 

He couldn’t contain the wide smile that stretched across his face, waving at you excitedly in hopes you’d do the same— unable to realize that the whole class was now looking at him, he was confused to watch the way your face screwed up into an expression of sheer embarrassment, shielding your face with your hand and looking away as some students began following his line of sight. 

Why did you do that? You were ignoring him, and it hurt like a bitch as Yeonjun frowned. His mind was racing as he began wondering what he might’ve done wrong— he was so focused, in fact, that he failed to notice the professor blocking his view, his reaction time much too slow as his eyes flickered up to meet the man’s gaze. Flustered, he backed away quickly, his face heating up as he bowed in apology— he hugged the bouquet close to his chest as he did, mumbling out a soft sorry the man probably couldn’t even hear. 

You, on the other hand, could hear the way your professor laughed at Yeonjun’s actions, absolutely mortified by the way he turned around and began to joke to the class, saying that “It looks like someone here has an admirer,” whilst looking in your direction, your classmates laughing along before he went back to his lecture.

Shit, this was so embarrassing. 

Yeonjun is so fucking stupid, you cry to yourself, peeking over at the doorway in hopes that he took the hint and left— but no, he definitely didn’t, because you could still see his figure through the window, leaning against the wall and holding an item the size of his whole upper body close to his chest. 

The last thing you wanted to do was go outside and see him— but that’s exactly what happened anyway, even if you lingered behind once class ended in hopes that Yeonjun would get impatient and wait— patience was never his strongest virtue, after all. 

But for you, anything could change. 

This is exactly why you find him outside the door, face hidden with what is, to your surprise, a large bouquet of your favorite flowers. 

Fuck, you seriously don’t want to talk to him right now. Gritting your teeth, you use this moment to sneak past him, a slight guilt tugging at you as you look back, spotting the way he seems oblivious to the fact that you’ve left already. 

Looking back was your first mistake.

Because Yeonjun, in a truly creepy fashion, is almost able to sense it, whipping his head to you and perking up at the way you only walk faster— then begin sprinting, refusing to look back again once he starts chasing after you. 

“Baby,” you hear him call out to you, the ridiculous rustling of his bouquet slightly muffling his words as his footsteps thud against the tiles; for an athlete, you’d expect him to catch up to you already, but you quietly pat yourself on the back for the slight head start you gave yourself. 

“Baby, wait!” he continues to yell, ignoring the strange stares from those passing by, “Please, let me talk to you!” 

“I don’t wanna talk!” you growl out, your emotions taking over as you remember why you’re mad at him, “leave me alone!”

You’re outside now; you’re a huffing and sweaty mess, but you refuse to slow down for even a second, the threat of Yeonjun hot on your heels fueling your stamina. 

“Can you please tell me what I did wrong?” He yells, exasperated as he watches you run off the sidewalk— you’re attempting to lose him, but countless running drills and morning runs have prepared him for this moment— without a second thought, he’s following you, attempting to peek over his— inconveniently large, he must admit— bouquet, watching the way you simply continue to run, glancing back every once in a while to see if he’s still there. 

“Please, can we be civil and talk about this?!” his words have you turning around to send him a glare— instead, you stumble to a stop as you watch Yeonjun trip, eyes widening at the dramatic sight before you. 

He’s fallen flat on his face, a puff of petals blowing up around him as you wince— he’s face-first into whatever’s left of the flowers, the rest of the petals fluttering in the air around him and falling delicately on his figure as you stare, the place eerily silent save for the chirping birds and rustling leaves.

He doesn’t say anything— he doesn’t make a sound, doesn’t even attempt to get up, left splattered all over the grass as you stare at him in slight concern. 

“Yeonjun?” you call out uncertainly, shifting on your feet as you pause. He doesn’t respond— he’s left frozen on the ground, and you’re frowning at the sight as you slowly make your way to him; you approach him slowly, as though you were approaching a wild animal, tense in your movements as you lean in to observe him. 

“Did you die?” you ask quietly, taking in the way he still hasn’t moved. Not an inch. You feel more concerned than you want to admit, crouching down in front of him as you bite your lip in worry. 

“Do you hate me.” the sudden words have you flinching, staring down at Yeonjun, who’s still eating dirt and flowers. You frown, scoffing at the way he weakly reaches out for you— swiftly, you slap his hand, watching the way it flops back onto the ground. 

“No— yes— a little,” you stutter out, angry at the way you bounce between responses just from the mere pathetic sight of him. 

“Can you forgive me?” he asks, the words muffled as it takes you a minute to decipher what he may be saying— you can’t help but roll your eyes at his antics.  

“For what?” you ask, picking a petal off his back absentmindedly as you wait— if he could answer properly, you might consider giving in. 

“For existing.” 

God, Yeonjun was such a sap. It has you biting back a smile as you resist the urge to stroke his hair, mused and riddled with petals from his grand gesture— but his answer was not the one you were looking for, and you’re standing back up and readjusting your clothes without another word. 

“pleaaaaseee,” you hear him whine, watching the way he shrivels up into a ball— then, he’s sitting back on his legs, whipping his head up and looking at you with wide, teary eyes. 

“Please take the flowers with you at least,” he pouts, thrusting the bouquet— or, whatever was left of it— up at you with pleading eyes.

Pressing your lips together, you sigh; a moment passes before you’re taking the gift from him begrudgingly, ignoring the way he perks up happily at your action. 

“I’m still mad at you,” you hiss, and he immediately deflates at your words, “Don’t visit my class like that again. Please.” 

He says nothing, left to watch as you turn your back to him and walk away; he has yet to get up, his heart pounding against his chest as he watches the way you hug the flowers close to you, shaking your head at the state of them. 

This was… progress. 

But you’re still mad at him. 

-ˏˋ♡ˊˎ-

TUESDAY

Visiting you in class was a big no. 

Visiting you in general, however, wasn’t off-limits.

You don’t want to talk to him? Fine, he can understand. In fact, he won’t talk to you at all— a feat much greater said than done— but hey, he always loved staring at you anyway. 

Well, it’s a little hard to stare by the way you’ve propped up textbooks around your face like a fort. 

He’s staring. He’s still staring. You can practically feel his puppy-eyed gaze burn into your brain telepathically; no matter how hard you try to focus on your work, it’s become damn near impossible with the way you can feel Yeonjun’s presence, your neck beginning to ache from the way you’ve remained ducked down this whole time. 

It was easy to deal with at first; you chose not to do anything the moment you saw Yeonjun emerge from the staircase and onto the top floor of the library— otherwise known as the quietest level. 

He wouldn’t be able to talk to you without disturbing the peace of others— and potentially being asked to leave— so you decided to not make a scene and go back to studying, even when you felt his eyes lock on your figure and beeline to you. 

He sat across from you first. Though, you were quick to move, pretending as though you were looking for a book as you quickly ran away to the other side of the library. You felt the way his eyes followed you the whole time— he looked like a kicked puppy, and damn did that stupid tactic of his always work, because you even felt yourself pausing for a second, wondering if you should give in and talk to him. 

But, you are a horrendously petty person.

You were holed up in some random corner. You didn’t even know there was a table there until today, the spot so secluded and quiet that you silently celebrated getting him off your trail.

It was peaceful— for like, a good ten minutes. 

You didn’t think much of it when you first heard it; footsteps, slow and calculated as they rounded about the bookshelves. You could hear the sound of books being pulled out clear as day, though you chose to ignore it all and keep focus on your assignments instead. 

After a moment, the footsteps disappeared. 

It was back to being completely silent. And, in your bored state, you began to look around the area you were huddled up in; curiously, you allowed yourself to walk around, reading the spines and pulling out books that seemed to pique your interest even slightly. 

There seemed to be another person here as well— maybe it was the same person as before, or maybe it was someone new— you didn’t pay mind to it nonetheless, continuing your journey as your eyes locked in on a particularly colorful book.

Slowly, you pulled it out— on the other side, you watched the book adjacent to yours slowly get pulled out as well, and a smile tugged at your lips at the odd coincidence. 

Then, your eyes met with Yeonjun’s. 

His gaze filled with admiration was only returned with a mean scowl from you. You were quick to shove the book back into its place, storming off to your table without a moment’s hesitation. 

Yeonjun was quickly able to find your hiding spot— one might think you could cry from the way you buried your face into your hands defeatedly, refusing to look up from your dark refuge as the sounds of a chair scraping against the carpeted floors met your ears. 

That’s how you found yourself here, ignoring what people might think as you hide behind your fortress of textbooks. You didn’t feel good staying in a secluded area with Yeonjun— not because you thought he might try to do anything— but because you were afraid of your own resolve crumbling, especially after you’d spent so much time trying to ignore him. 

You wonder if he’s still here. Who are you kidding, of course he’s still here, though you can’t really bring yourself to check and see for yourself. 

After a while, you hear scribbling sounds. 

You can’t hide the way you jump as a piece of paper hits your head, folded into a perfect heart and landing in front of you with a dull thud. 

Open me :( it says, and though you wish you could say you were strong enough to ignore it, you definitely aren’t.

Can you pls let me look at u at least?

You don’t get much of a moment to process the message. Another paper lands directly in front of you, shaped into a heart and scrawled with the same words as the last— slowly, you open it, dreading what might be written inside this time. 

I miss you so so so so so much. 

You shake your head at his words. Sliding the paper to the side, you ignore his request, choosing to focus on your work instead of giving in to his silly tactics. After a moment, you wonder if you’ll be getting another paper— instead, nothing happens; the sigh of relief you let out is almost comical, your body relaxing a bit as you allow yourself to wonder if he’s finally left. 

That was your second mistake. 

Because after a few minutes, another paper hits you. It’s another heart, and you find that you don’t need to open it this time, the message scrawled on top for easier access. 

I’m sorry. 

Another paper flies over your fortress.

I’m sorry.

Then, another. 

Pls forgive me.

Then another. And another, and another, and another. 

Pls, I hate making you mad. I feel so gross and sad rn. I seriously can’t go a day without you. I miss you sm, pls :(((

You feel like you’re under attack— the way he continues to throw paper after paper is rhythmic and almost impressive, the endless stream of hearts covering your keyboard and forcing you to sweep them to the side after seconds. 

It’s useless to study. How can you, when Yeonjun keeps throwing his apologies at you? It’s stupid and childish and is enough for you to take your textbooks down, your jaw clenched and your eyes pointed in a sharp glare that has Yeonjun pausing in his actions. 

There’s a small pile of hearts next to him. 

Neither of you move— he’s frozen mid-throw, his eyes widening as though he can’t grasp the fact that you’re actually looking at him— even if it’s filled with rage and annoyance. 

Slowly, the corners of his lips curl up— you can’t find it in you to react as he throws the paper in his hands, feeling the way it smacks right onto your forehead before it falls to the table. 

Can I show u how sorry I am??

You don’t seem to think of the consequences as you reach for your bag in the seat next to you— devoid of anything except a few pencils and your hoodie— and throw it at him, watching the way he yelps in surprise, your bag spilling out it’s few contents all over the floor. The sound is enough to have the people around you glancing at your table, curious or angry at the sound of the ruckus. 

You’re worked up and huffing as you watch Yeonjun scramble to gather the spilled contents of your bag, watching as he stutters out whispered apologies between his actions. 

“Excuse me,” the hand on your shoulder is firm as you twist your head to look at the librarian, your expression falling at the realization of what you’ve just done. 

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” 

Whipping your head around, you meet eyes with a sheepish and guilty Yeonjun, gritting your teeth as he holds out your bag for you to take. 

Wordlessly, you snatch it from him, shoving your computer and the rest of your items into it before you’re turning around to face the librarian; you whisper out a soft “I’m so sorry” as you bow in apology, waiting for her to leave before you’re facing Yeonjun again. 

I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to, he mouths to you, though you ignore it all as you choose to whack his shoulder with your very-full bag instead; the pained whimper he lets out has you gritting your teeth in irritation, watching the way he pouts up at you as he rubs his arm pathetically. 

“Don’t pull this shit again,” you hiss out, storming off before he can get another word out. 

There goes all his progress. 

-ˏˋ♡ˊˎ-

WEDNESDAY

Today has been an oddly nice day.

It’s nice— too nice, you wonder, pondering what may be different enough to have you walking with a smile on your face, appreciating the beautiful weather in a light mood. 

A guy your age is leaning against a tree up ahead. He holds a bouquet of roses, and you smile at the way he seems to be passing one out to every person that passes him. That’s so sweet, you think to yourself, and you can’t help the way your stomach twists in anticipation the moment his eyes meet yours. 

“Would you like a rose?” he asks you, his blond hair shining under the sunlight as he sends you a bright smile— you don’t hesitate to say yes, taking the flower from him with a cute thank you! 

The flower is in full bloom as you twirl it between your fingers absentmindedly. The smile on your face is seemingly permanent as you make your way to your favorite cafe, though as you think back to the interaction, you can’t help but wonder if you know that man from somewhere.

It isn’t until you stop at a crosswalk that you notice it— there’s a tag on the rose, and though you initially thought it was just a price tag, you realize that it’s something else; pausing before you cross the street, you take a moment to tilt your head and read it, feeling your jaw drop as your brain registers the words in disbelief. 

Yeonjun says he’s sorry.

“What the fuck,” you mutter to yourself, ripping it off without hesitation and shoving it into your pocket— you definietly recognize the man from earlier, you realize— that was Hueningkai!

You roll your eyes at Yeonjun’s weak ploy to talk to you— you can’t help the way it leaves you irritated as you stand in line to order, trying your best to recite your regular order to the barista with a smile on your face, the man before you giving you a dimpled smile before he’s off to make it.

By the time you get your order, you’ve calmed down— you’re quick to exit and make your way back towards campus, using this small break between classes to study again. (without Yeonjun around, hopefully.) 

Your fingers are absentminded as you trace over the printed sticker on the side of the cup that has your order printed on it, glancing down at the text before you take another sip. 

Yeonjun is really sorry.

…What? 

You were more unnerved than anything. The lengths Yeonjun had gone through to communicate almost concerned you, though all you could do at this point was rip the sticker off and shove it in your pocket, ignoring it like the other one. You wracked your mind for answers as you began to wonder if you had seen that barista anywhere else, and after a moment, you settled on the vague conclusion that you think you’ve seen him in Yeonjun’s frat house before. 

He’s so annoying, you sigh to yourself, rubbing at your temples as you fear an upcoming headache. 

You’re startled back to life at the sight of a puppy running up to you— you’re frowning at the sight, unsure of what to do as it stops right at your feet, jumping up on you and barking excitedly— almost like it recognized you— squinting, you observe the dog. 

Oh god, you think to yourself, realizing with dread that you do recognize this damn dog.

“Matcha, who let you out,” you huff, leaning down to scoop the tiny dog into your arms— in the distance, you can see someone running in your direction, though you choose to ignore it as you notice Matcha’s brand new collar. 

Yeonjun misses you more than anything. 

The words are wrapped around his collar, leaving you to throw your head back and groan at the sight; the footsteps are much louder than before, and you’re looking forward again as you spot yet another familiar face. 

“Beomgyu,” you sneer, shoving Matcha into his awaiting hands. All he can do is laugh sheepishly, muttering out what a coincidence! Petting Matcha, he pauses, giving you an expectant look that only leaves you confused.

“Could you forgive him?”

“Go away!” you say in return, weaving out of his way and practically running off to the library; you can hear Matcha barking at you, though you choose to ignore it as Beomgyu’s calls of your name fuel you further. 

You feel out of breath by the time you finally enter the library, finding the nearest help desk and beginning to rummage through your bag for any books you need renewed— the librarian simply smiles at you patiently as he waits, adjusting his glasses before he quickly turns around to get something— by the time he’s back, you’ve laid out your books for him, thanking him quietly as you watch him renew them quickly.

When he slides them back towards you, you frown— there’s a bookmark on top of your small stack of books, laminated and shiny under the lights as you pick it up to get rid of the glare— reading it, you can already feel the need to tear it, though it seems as this cheeky worker is already one step ahead of you. 

Yeonjun just wants to talk to you again.

Three ways to better communication in a relationship:

The glare you send the worker— Taehyun, his name tag reads— is lethal, though he doesn’t seem to be affected by it as he simply sends you an innocent smile. Without another word, you gather your books, shoving them into your bag as you turn to leave.

“Ignoring him won’t solve anything,” he calls out quietly, though you don’t seem to appreciate the advice by the way you don’t even bother to turn back and react. Instead, you walk right back out, storming home as you type on your phone furiously. 

my baby :((

stop using others to relay messages damn it!!!

my baby :((

and don’t use matcha against me you loser!!!!!!

Through his end, Yeonjun is just happy that you’re texting him— though, the mean name is not much appreciated. 

Choi Yeonjun. 

can you pls let me talk to you instead?

You don’t bother opening the notification. 

That was your third mistake.

-ˏˋ♡ˊˎ-

THURSDAY

Today has been relatively peaceful. You have yet to be bothered today— no Yeonjun, no Matcha, and certainly none of his friends. 

Maybe because he was aware of your plans today; you did tell him a while ago about your reunion with one of your friends, always chatting his ear off about how excited you were to finally see her again—it slightly warms your heart to know that he actually listens to you.

Well. Most of the time. 

“You’re fighting right now?” Tzuyu asks, leaning forward in her seat with wide eyes. You didn’t expect this sudden change of topic, but you can only nod grimly in response, watching as she sighs in dismay at your situation. 

“Wow, you guys never fight— at least, not to this level,” she’s deep in thought over your relationship as she frowns, crossing her arms over her chest as she stares down at her empty plate— you both chose to forgo dessert, and now you wait patiently for your check.

“Well, what are you guys even fighting about?” 

“It’s just—“ you’re cut off by your server placing the check in between the two of you, thanking him with a smile on your face before you’re freezing; you’re unsure of what to make of the plate that he places before you, stuttering out unintelligible sentences that you didn’t order… whatever this was. 

“Free of charge,” the man says, before bowing politely and scurrying away; you’re barely able to get a word out before you huff in defeat, looking back at the treat in front of you as you take in Tzuyu’s amused laughter.

“What?” you ask, frowning as you watch her turn the plate towards you— you’re left a bit speechless by what you see, mouth falling open as your brain attempts to comprehend how you should react to this. 

It’s dessert— well, more specifically, three full scoops of ice cream, the caramel drizzle and other toppings decorating it to make it look like a cat; more specifically, a sad cat. All along the plate, more caramel drizzle decorates it to form a sentence. 

I miss you. Please, talk to me. YJ. 

Your head snaps up in the direction the waiter went in; looking out the small window of the kitchen door, you spot none other than Yeonjun, his eyes widening before he’s ducking out of the way like a deer in headlights. 

“How the fuck did he get back there?!” you cry out, running a hand down your face in disbelief— but no, one more glance back in his direction is enough to catch him peeking at you again, flinching in surprise before he’s ducking out of your sight once more. 

“Who let him in there?” you hiss, placing your head in your hands as Tzuyu merely laughs; you ignore the way she begins to dig into the dessert after you express that you won’t touch it, humming happily that it was a sweet gesture. 

A moment’s thought is able to remind you where you are— in Beomgyu’s older brother’s restaurant, of course. 

Defeatedly, you open the checkbook to offer to pay— though the price has your eyes practically bulging out, reading and re-reading the strange excuse of a check this waiter has brought to you. 

Your meal was free. 

The only thing you read on the paper was a poor excuse of Yeonjun replacing the food items with “i miss you”s and “i’m sorry”s, the sight baffling you as Tzuyu turns the check towards her in curiosity. 

“Interesting,” she hums, closing the checkbook before she’s fishing for tip money, “Are you sure you wanna lose a guy like him?”

You take a second to think her question through. 

Yet another mistake on your part. 

-ˏˋ♡ˊˎ-

FRIDAY

Remembering what happened today is enough to have your head hurting— so, you’ll keep it short.

You were working— working, minding your own business, prey to unsuspecting events— when it happened. 

Fridays were always rush days. Maybe that’s why you didn’t think to pay attention to your surroundings, to the blasting music, the yell of your coworkers calling out drinks and names, or to the endless chatter of the customers around you. 

You should have paid attention— maybe, if you did, you would’ve been able to spare yourself the embarrassment— another mistake of yours, if you will. 

The break of music from the radio was not what caught your attention— radio hosts do it all the time, speaking in between songs with useless chatter as they find a song to play next— no, what did catch your attention, however, was the eerily familiar voice, and worse, the eerily familiar message he broadcasted all over your local station. 

“This next song is called Seven,” he spoke, smooth, suave, and relaxing as the track rolled in quietly in the background, “a song about a man more than willing to show how devoted he is to his to his partner— ___, come home, the kids miss you— well, more like Matcha, but still.”

You could feel your coworkers freeze around you. You could feel their gazes slowly drift to you, could feel the way customers got a good look at the decorated name tag you once showed off proudly. 

“Is— is he…?” your coworker whispered beside you, watching the way you caved into yourself in attempts to hide your nametag, “is he that frat boy you were talking about?”

“No.” you say, avoiding everyone’s gaze as you focus on making your drink instead, “No. That’s not him. This isn’t about me, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“___, I’ll keep waiting for you patiently. Have a good shift today.” 

Christ!

Your coworkers could only laugh lightheartedly at his words— they found it cute, which was even worse for you, because all you could wonder was how the fuck he was able to get into the broadcast station— this time, you seriously couldn’t figure out any ties between him and the place. 

“Looks like he won’t give up,” to say you were horrified at the way a customer told you this was an understatement, her eyes alight with amusement as she spoke to you with a tone so genuine you almost thought she was in on it— fuck, maybe she was— “if anything, you should turn him down soon before he goes too far.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” you breathed out, tired of these constant antics as you thought over her words, forced to go through the rest of your shift pretending as though Yeonjun hadn’t broadcasted his pleading message to the whole city— well, more like anyone who was listening to the local radio station willingly.

You feel like you’re on The Truman Show, or something.

-ˏˋ♡ˊˎ-

SATURDAY

You were scared to talk to Yeonjun. 

Scared— why were you scared? You don’t know why, but you couldn’t bring yourself to send him a text message, pacing around your room like an idiot instead as you wondered what you would tell him. 

Would you talk? Would you finally break up with him?

The way your stomach sank with dread at the mere thought of the second option was enough of an answer for you— no, you shouldn’t break up with him.

However, it was storming today— there was no way in hell you would be going outside to meet him in such weather, so you opted to psych yourself up to send him a text message asking to meet up instead.

You were pacing around your room again when you noticed it. 

There’s a bright umbrella outside— shit, you recognize that umbrella, you realize with a heavy dread, walking up to your window and pulling your curtains open as you stare out in dismay.

Why the fuck is Yeonjun outside right now?

It’s perfect timing, the way his umbrella raises to show his figure; oh my god, you think to yourself, biting your lip as you take his expression in, he’s crying!

This was not your intention. You never meant to hurt Yeonjun like this, but you also were not ready to see him yet— so, with a slight pang in your heart, you shut the curtains again, leaving just enough of a crack to make sure that he’ll leave.

Instead, he stayed there. In true Yeonjun fashion, squinting up at your window in hopes that you’d at least tell him to go away. Instead, he watched as you peeked through the crack of the curtains, his heart fluttering slightly at the way you thought you were being discreet with your actions. 

Slowly, Yeonjun turns his phone to you; there’s writing flashing by in his phone, though you have to squint your eyes and wait for the whole sentence to roll by to see what he’s trying to tell you now. 

I know you don’t… want to see me… right now but I … seriously just need… to know what I … did wrong. 

God. Fuck. This whole “ghosting” ordeal was harder than it should be when someone like Yeonjun was involved. 

 It’s been like… a week and you… still haven’t talked… to me.

Oh, the guilt is seriously eating you up right now. You weren’t supposed to ignore him for days on end, but each time Yeonjun reached out for you, you couldn’t control the way you ran away in return, still hurt by the things he didn’t even realize he did.

You’ve finally gotten a good grasp of his obliviousness.

I’m sorry… I love you… I love you… I love you…

Only three words are rolling by on his phone now. You think you’ve gotten the gist of what he’s trying to tell you as you sink to the floor, out of sight and exasperated as you reach for your phone to make a call. 

“Hello?”

“Please come get Yeonjun. He’s outside my apartment in the freezing rain.”

“Uhm, let him in then?”

“I— I can’t,” you mutter sheepishly as you feel your face heating up, your stomach sinking as you hear Beomgyu scoffing on the other side of the line, “I don’t want to talk to him right now. Not like this.”

“Then I guess he’ll stay out in the freezing rain.” 

“He’ll get sick!” you say, and it’s only now that you feel stupid for this push and pull you’ve created, “please. I’m begging you.” 

“You need to talk to him.”

“I want to. I will.” you say, placing a hand on your forehead as you sigh, “Tomorrow.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.” 

A pause. Then, you hear rustling, and the sounds of Beomgyu grumbling quietly to himself.

“I’ll go get him,” he says, and you can feel yourself sink further against the wall in relief, “you better not back out on your word, okay?”

“Okay.” 

You hope you’re not making a mistake. 

-ˏˋ♡ˊˎ-

SUNDAY

This is awkward. You feel awkward. You probably look awkward, too. 

Yeonjun, for once, looks just as awkward and tense before you. His whole body is rigid as he sits on your couch, feeling more like a stranger in your home than the man you’ve spent the past few months with, the way his eyes wander around making you feel like it’s his first time here. 

“Yeonjun,” you sigh out, catching his attention as his eyes zero in on you immediately; you feel nervous under his gaze, unsure of what to say as your brain begins to stutter, your mouth opening and closing in hopes that a proper sentence will come out.

“What did I do wrong?” he cries out, snapping you out of your troubled reverie as your eyes meet his— they’re glossy, and you’re afraid he might just start crying again if you look away, “can we start there?”

“You— you seriously don’t know?” you ask, bewildered by his question as you sit back on your couch— Yeonjun simply shakes his head reverently in response, and you’re blinking owlishly at him as you stare at him in disbelief. 

“We didn’t have any arguments before this,” he says, nibbling on his lip as he thinks back to the moment you yelled at him, tearing his arm off you as he attempted to keep you from running away, “You just snapped at me then disappeared— I, I want to know what I did wrong, at least.”

“Yeonjun you—“ you’re dragging a hand down your cheek as you clench your jaw, taking a second to breathe to not snap at him again, “that’s the problem, you’re just so— so oblivious, I seriously thought you’d be able to put two and two together by now!” 

Oh, oh this is embarrassing; you should not be getting worked up right now, your hands immediately coming up to hide your face as you hear Yeonjun cooing out your name softly— he’s next to you at the speed of light, attempting to take your hands away as he quietly tells you to breathe in his stupid, calming voice. 

“You’re always at those stupid parties, you stupid frat boy—“ you’re stuttering through your sentences, the heat in your face humiliating as you feel your emotions finally tumbling down, “and I know I told you I’m okay with it— I am, I really am— but what I’m not okay with is how fucking flirty you are!”

You can feel Yeonjun’s hands stiffen; slowly, his mouth drops in shock, his face beginning to pale as he realizes just why you’re mad at him. 

“I’ve told you— time, and time again— that, that I don’t like when you feed into people like that, that you never reject advances and tell them that you have a fucking girlfriend,” you know he never means it in a harmful way. You know that, nine times out of ten, Yeonjun doesn’t even realize those advances are happening, but it’s always just as painful to watch, knowing that charming attitude and cheeky voice is exactly how he got you, “and it just makes me feel so… so stupid and jealous and unwanted!” 

You feel out of breath by the time you finish. Though you remain silent and try to calm yourself, you instead begin to feel more anger festering inside you as you take in Yeonjun’s face, full of dread and realization as he begins to think back to how he was acting back at the frat party that caused this mess. 

Yeonjun was used to people acting the way they did around him. It never fazed him, and most of the time he simply followed along because he found it fun. No, he never thought of having anyone else but you, you’re his everything— though, he does realize how inconsiderate he’s been of your feelings now. 

“Baby, baby, I’m so sorry,” he says, his words genuine and filled with guilt as he cups your face gently, “I didn’t know.”

“Fuck!” Your response is unprecedented as you shake his hands off you, pushing him back and forcing him to lay across the couch as he looks up at you in surprise. He’s unable to do anything as he watches the way you throw your legs on each side of his waist, grabbing a fistful of his shirt and tugging him up as you sneer at him.

“That’s your problem, you just don’t know—!” pushing him back on the couch, he lets out a soft oof! unable to help the way his stomach swirls in anticipation of your next move, “You’re just too stupid, you don’t know anything unless someone spells it out for you!”

Shit. Yeonjun has never seen you like this, frustrated and restless as you shift above him, your eyes alight with rage as you begin tugging your hoodie over your head; his eyes widen comically at the action, shifting nervously under you as he realizes that oh, you’re not wearing a bra. 

“You’ve seriously left me wondering if you’re even taking this relationship seriously, it’s ridiculous!” Yeonjun feels like he’s been left on autopilot as he lets you tug him up again; he’s sitting up, hands hovering precariously as you glare at him, the sight enough to have him gulping nervously.

“I— I do,” he stutters out, watching as you send him an accusing look, “I do, I do I do, I take you so seriously, and fuck, I haven’t been thinking of anyone but you all week.” 

“Yeah?” you ask him, patronizing and unexpectedly mean as you look down at him, “You never fucking act like it.”

“Yes I do—!” he yells out, though it’s cut off by the way you sit down firmly in his lap, a hand threading into his hair and yanking at the roots as you tug his head back cruelly, “I’ve shown you this whole week just how much I think about you…” 

Yeonjun is hard. Painfully so, and you don’t think you’ve ever seen him get turned on so quickly— it’s enough to have you laughing breathily, tugging on his hair again and listening to the way he only lets out a high whine in response.

“What you’ve shown me this week,” you hiss, bringing him close to you, your lips grazing against his as you speak, “is that you’re a desperate bitch that doesn’t know how to be patient.”

“You were ignoring me,” he fights back, letting out a breathy wince at the way your grip tightens on his hair, “you’ve been so mean to me—!”

Yeonjun doesn’t get another word in on the matter. The way you bite his lip ruthlessly and sneak your tongue into his mouth has you feeling the way he practically turns to putty under you, his cheeks just as red as his lips as he gasps against your own, feeling the way you begin to grind against his cock without remorse. 

“Me? I’ve been mean to you?” you wonder out loud, hands running down his chest before you’re tugging his shirt up; you don’t bother taking it off as it rests against his chest, leaning him back and running your hands over his skin as you take in the way his stomach twitches in response. “do you know how many people think they’ve actually got a chance with you, all because you refuse to use common sense and say, oh, I’ve got a girlfriend!” 

Yeonjun shakes his head; there’s no way your words are true, especially when he’s literally obsessed with you. But of course, you’re always right— which is exactly why you’re fueled to rake your nails down his skin, leaving him to hiss and twitch at the feeling of your acrylics digging into his stomach and leaving bright, red scratch marks— acrylics he paid for because he thought they were pretty, the reminder only making his cock twitch pathetically. 

“There’s no one in this world that has a chance with me but you,” Yeonjun insists, pouting at the way you only scoff at his words, “I’ve never done anything to fuel other people’s strange fantasies.”

“God, you’re stupid,” you say, and Yeonjun thinks he must’ve lost his mind from the way he can feel a whine building up in his throat, “and to think I found that endearing.”

“You’re so mean,” he pouts— though he’s quick to regret it, letting out a loud cry as you begin grinding against him, able to feel the warmth of your pussy through the thin shorts you wear, your breast bouncing from the way your body begins to move. 

“You don’t like it?” You ask, tilting your head to watch as he merely shakes his head in response— all you can do is plant yourself to where you can feel his length pressed up against your slit, throbbing against you as you pout at him in false pity, “no you don’t like it, or no you do?”

“I— I…” he doesn’t know how to respond; it seems as though Yeonjun hasn’t figured out the response for himself, but you can feel it from the way his hips buck up into yours, stuttering and without rhythm as he remains defenseless under you. 

“You do like it,” you say, mocking at the way he only whimpers from the feeling of your nails digging into his hips, “Feels nice to be on the receiving end, baby?”

Fuck. Fuck, oh fuck, this was strange and new and Yeonjun was definitely enjoying himself more than he thought he should, a melted pile of remorse and love as he pathetically waited for your next move, doe eyes staring up at you as he felt his mouth part, unable to say anything as he gave in to the mean look you sent him. 

“Been waiting patiently for me, hmm?” you ask him, thinking back to his earlier words as you watch him nod eagerly in confirmation, “So you bothering me every day of the week was you being patient?”

“I just wanted to talk,” Yeonjun whines out, chest heaving at the way you begin rolling your hips against his, your rhythm firm and dangerous as he feels weak moans leaving him like a stream, “but you— you kept avoiding me, I wanted to get some confirmation that you didn’t break up with me that day…!”

“Yeah?” you mock him, your voice just as whiny and breathy as his as you lean down to him; placing your hands on his chest, you tilt your head, grinding your cunt against him in a way that has him panting and looking for someplace to grab onto, “and did you get your answer?”

Yeonjun doesn’t even think he registered what you said. All he knows is that the way you’re sitting on him is genuinely cruel, especially with the way he hasn’t felt your body against his in so long. His mind is muddled and he can feel himself losing control from the way his hips begin to buck up, his brain going blank except for the thought that he hasn’t felt you against him in what seems like ages, his body so pent up with frustration that he can’t help but chase after the slight pleasure you offer him. 

Yeonjun’s mind has blanked out. You can see it in his face, the way it’s twisted with pleasure as he fails to respond to you, body bucking up into you so wildly that you have to steady yourself with two hands pressed firmly against his chest, your balance getting screwed over at his attempts to fuck up into you. 

The feeling of your warm hands is enough to bring Yeonjun back, eyes widening in realization as his eyes meet yours, clouded with so much need that it has Yeonjun slowing his pace immediately.

“Fuck, fuck, wait,” he stutters out, eyes widening at the way your cunt is practically leaking onto him— he can feel it through the layers of clothes, “wait wait wait, I’m so— ah, please— so… sososo close, baby, please…!”

“Wait?” you echo, brows furrowing as he nods frantically in response, “thought you didn’t like waiting?”

“No, please, please,” he whimpers, though his hips don’t stop their mindless rutting into your warm cunt, “please, don’t wanna come like this, wanna be inside you.”

“No?” you repeat, the mocking tone of your voice making his eyes screw shut, “why don’t you stop then? It’s all up to you.”

Oh, of course he can stop— though, that doesn’t mean he will, your hips slowly grinding against his as you watch the way his mouth falls open, not a sound falling past it before his hips buck up into you wildly— slowly, you feel a warmth spread beneath you, Yeonjun’s eyes screwed tightly as tears begin to peek from the corners. 

“Nooooo nonono, no, not like this,” he cried quietly to himself, ever the hypocrite as his hands fly to your waist, riding out his orgasm with loud, shameless moans. 

“Oh, my baby,” you say, pouting at the way he apologizes to you under his breath, “Is that it? Are you done now?”

“No, not done,” he’s quick to respond despite his rattled state of mind, looking up at you through bleary eyes. 

“No?” you hum, taking a moment to watch him carefully. 

“No,” he repeats, breathless as his grip tightens on your hips— even through the sensitivity, you can still feel his hips roll up into yours, quiet whimpers and whines leaving him as he does so— though, he can’t find it in himself to stop, at least not with the way he has yet to feel you around him. 

“God, this is so pitiful,” you say, frowning at the way Yeonjun struggles to sit up underneath you; you’re cupping his face as he looks up at you, teary eyes and flushed face unable to say anything as he simply leans into your touch— the way you coo softly has him pouting, and you can’t resist the urge to hover over his lips, teasing him with a smile as you brush over them, placing chaste kisses that only have him chasing you for more. 

“What a good bitch,” you hiss, feeling the way his hands have wandered up to play with your breasts, obsessed as always as his fingers tug and circle your nipples, eager to feel them harden under his touch, “doesn’t matter how many times you cum, hmm? Just need to make me feel good?”

“Yes, yes yes yes,” he babbles, wincing and moaning at the way your lips have begun to wander along his neck, nipping and sucking and leaving enough marks that a person could spot from far away with ease; the way your teeth sink into his skin practically has him crying, and he can feel his heart pounding against his chest the moment he feels you pause, your nose nuzzling into the spot behind his ear, your breath ticklish on his skin as you laugh. 

“Are you wearing my perfume, junie?” You mumble, hearing the way he can only whine in embarrassment; he doesn’t answer you, and you bite at his earlobe softly as you wait, silently demanding a response as his hands fall to your hips, gripping them pathetically as though his life depended on it. 

“I missed you,” he repeats, the words making you roll your eyes as your hand finds itself in his hair; you’re tugging at it, tilting his head and exposing his neck to you as you begin to nose along the column, closing your eyes to confirm if this is really your scent, “couldn’t smell you on my clothes anymore, love your scent s’much, ah…”

His neck has always been sensitive; that’s exactly why you choose to focus on it so much, not leaving until it’s covered with your marks and his tears have run down them, his soft sniffles making you glance up as you take him in, overstimulated and a mess as he bites his lip in an attempt to quiet himself.

“Too much, baby?” You coo, running a hand through his hair and pushing it back comfortingly, watching as he shakes his head adamantly, his wide eyes shiny and tear-filled as he looks up at you.

“No,” he mumbles, wrapping his arms around you and tugging you towards him; his face is buried in your chest, and you can’t hold back the gasp you let out as his mouth immediately attaches itself to your breast, plump lips sucking at it as his tongue runs along it, messy and spit-filled as he looks back up at you, grinding you into him with weak whimpers, “want you to use me, you can do anything you want to me, just wanna please you.”

“Such a good boy for me, junie,” you say, his eyes fluttering close at your fond comment. “Are you gonna listen to me, for once?”

“I always listen to you,” he insists, and you feel irked by his words as you scoff.

“Like hell you do,” you sneer, easily angered as he shrinks down from your cold gaze, “Show me then— strip.”

Yeonjun is eager to listen, eager to please; you don’t think you’ve ever seen him get undressed so quickly, kicking off his pants and throwing his shirt off in some random direction as he looks up at you expectantly, his cock a mess and already beginning to harden as your eyes fall to it.

“Hard already?” You muse, watching the way his cheeks blush red at your comment. Your hand is teasing as you wrap your fingers around his length, your perfect nails shining under the light as you slowly begin to move up and down, the cum from his previous orgasm guiding your movements as he begins to twitch under you, crying softly at the overstimulation. 

“Guess you weren’t lying,” you sigh out, finger swiping over his throbbing tip as you hear him yelp at the feeling, “just a cute body for me to use, hmm? You’re nothing but a dick for me to get myself off on?”

Yeonjun is mindlessly agreeing with you— your words are clearly affecting him, his cock leaking and throbbing in your hand, making a mess of it as his head falls back, throat displaying all the marks you left on him earlier like a trophy.

His head is snapping back up the moment you sink onto him. You’re warm, tight, and so fucking wet, his body jolting at the feeling of you clenching around him, taking him inch by inch as he feels the way your walls stretch to adjust to him.

“Fuck…” you hiss, your arousal practically dripping on him from how good he feels— “Yeonjun, shit.”

“Waiiittt, wait, oh god, no— don’t say my name like that, fuck,” Yeonjun begins moaning, your lips quirking into a smile as you watch his eyes screw shut, already knowing what’s coming from the way he holds onto you tighter, head buried into your chest as he tries to still your hips.

“Hmm? What’s wrong?” You ask, feigning innocence as you roll your hips into him, moaning dramatically as you do, “Oh, Yeonjun, Yeonjun— fuck, junie, you feel so good, feel so full…”

He’s shaking his head hopelessly; you know what you’re doing to him, and he feels pathetic by the way he loses his senses the more you sink onto him, his cock twitching in you uncontrollably as he warns you to stop, stop, stop before I…!

“This is embarrassing, Yeonjunie,” you pout, feeling the way a warmth spreads inside you the moment you sit on his hips snugly, feeling him bottomed out inside you as he attempts to muffle his sounds. His ears are bright red and he refuses to show you his face as he keeps you close to him, his arms still hugging you flush against him as you feel the valley of your breasts become wet with his tears. 

“Why are you crying, hmm?” You ask him, looking down to see the way he still hides his face, “You’ve already come twice, shouldn’t you be happy? You’re so easy, Yeonjunie.”

Your words are degrading, your voice cold as continue to mock him— and though you pretend otherwise, you can feel the way he ruts his hips into you with every mean comment, clearly enjoying himself more than he lets on as he lets out a broken cry against your skin. 

“Fuck, are you seriously getting off to this?” You snap, bored with pretending as though you don’t feel your boyfriend clinging to you tighter as you degrade him, “You’re such a fucking slut— you get off to anything, don’t you?”

The way you pull him away from your skin is sudden and rough, a soft yelp leaving him as he’s finally forced to face you, eyes fluttering open and meeting your own, your face twisted in annoyance as you look down at him.

“Acting like a bitch in heat, already came twice from nothing,” you grit, rolling your hips against his as you watch the way his eyes roll back— your other hand comes up to grip his cheeks, digging into the flesh and squeezing them together as he pouts at you, eyes welling with tears as he feels your nails dig into him.

“Don’t you feel bad? How am I supposed to get myself off if you can barely keep your dick up for more than a minute?” Your eyes darken at the way he simply lets out a pathetic sorry, ‘m so sorry baby, “What? I don’t think I heard you right.”

Your pussy feels so good around him; Yeonjun is barely able to think straight from the way you’ve begun to bounce on his cock ruthlessly, the sight of your breasts bouncing before him hypnotizing as you jerk his head back up to look at you, towering over him and demanding as you slow your hips to a mean grind.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he whines out, his words incoherent and mushed together as you keep a hold of his face, listening as you hiss out for what? “‘M sorry for being so impatient— ah, ah, please— ngh, sorry for coming too soon, sorry for…”

He doesn’t finish his sentence. He can’t find the ability to, distracted by the way your sounds have picked up, your fingers rubbing circles on your clit as you continue to use his cock like a toy; his cheeks feel sore as he stares at you with wide eyes, watching your face contort with pleasure, your rhythm become sloppy as you feel your legs getting tired. 

You didn’t think Yeonjun would pick up on it; without any warning, you find your back colliding against the couch, your eyes widening as you feel Yeonjun still settled in between your legs, cock still nestled deeply inside you; he’s still a pouty mess above you, hands gripping onto your hips as he begins rutting into you, his thrusts rough and out of control as he takes in your figure hungrily. 

“Sorry for making you feel unwanted,” Yeonjun babbles, feeling you throw your arms around his neck from the sudden confession, bringing him in close as you feel his face hover above your own, “I only want you, want you to use me and mark me so others know who I belong to, I’m all yours baby— please, please please please tell me you’re close, wanna feel you come on my cock, wanna make you feel good, missed you, missed this pussy, fuck, mmh, ugh, feel so good, so good, soso good, please, baby—“

Yeonjun thinks you’re something of an aphrodisiac to him; at least, that must be the explanation if he’s able to cum the moment he feels you unravel around him, unrestrained and addicted to the feeling as he listens to your pretty sounds, practically melting as he hears your voice purring under him— so good, fuck, you’re all mine Yeonjunie, all mine…

You don’t think you’ve ever felt Yeonjun cum this much— his cock continues to twitch and release inside you even after you’ve come down from your high, the man above you burying his head into the crook of your neck as he cries softly at the feeling, unable to help the way his hips buck forward to ride out his orgasm.

This shift in dynamic is new— but it’s addicting, and you find yourself thoroughly enjoying the way Yeonjun clings to you, his head hazy and needy for your comfort as he lays on top of you, uncaring of how heavy he may be as he wraps his strong arms around you. 

Missed you s’much baby, missed you, please don’t do that again, you could hear him mutter into your skin, a bit out of it as he peppered kisses along your collarbones.

“Alright, alright, I won’t,” you breathe out, running your fingers through his hair soothingly as he leans into your touch like a cat, “I’m sorry I kept running away from you.”

“But then again,” you trail off, tightening your grip on his hair teasingly, feeling the way he immediately whines softly, “you should’ve given me space when I asked you to. It was kinda cute, but don’t do that again— okay?”

“Okay. Of course. Whatever you say,” his response is immediate, not an ounce of hesitation as he stares at you with eyes shining with devotion. After a second, his lips part, and he’s hovering over you again as he looks down at you in wonder. 

“Does that mean we’re boyfriend-girlfriend again?”

You laugh.

“You idiot,” you coo, placing a soft kiss on his lips, unable to control your laugh as you do, “We didn’t stop being boyfriend-girlfriend. I was just mad at you.”

“Hmm. Then, can I eat you out?” His words have you freezing, looking at him in bewilderment as he simply smiles at you sheepishly, “To like. Show you how sorry I am.”

A pause. 

“…And, because I really missed eating you out.”

You sigh— and try not to show how eager you are as you nod softly. Yeonjun however, is shameless as he immediately pulls out, hissing softly at the feeling before he’s sinking to his stomach— you’re gulping at the sight. 

“You’re insatiable.” Your comment doesn’t faze him— if anything, it makes him smile, his pretty eyes staring at you with enough adoration and love that you’re squirming slightly under him.

“For you, yeah.”

-ˏˋ♡ˊˎ-

On Monday, the sight of Yeonjun on campus is enough to have you spinning on your heels and running in the opposite direction. He wears nothing but a thin tank top, wondering why you’re yelling at him to cover up the moment he answers your phone call. 

“Why? It’s hot outside— …and, like, I wanna show everyone who I belong to.”

(You refuse to stand by his side until he covers up—though, you can’t ignore the way his words send butterflies through your stomach.)