#i love low poly stuff it's so charming

[aphantimes]

i love knuckles' sa1 dreamcast model so much. he's so cute

LOOK AT HIM

[dustofthedailylife]

brainrot time. kaveh and alhaitham with a roommate that’s just a mix of them both

alhaitham’s logic, kaveh’s compassion, alhaitham’s academic inclinations, kaveh’s ‘artistic soul’ (as he would say), alhaitham’s observance and perception, kaveh’s charm, alhaitham’s intelligence, kaveh’s drive, etc. etc. idk

alhaitham’s laziness, kaveh’s impulse control, alhaitham’s sharp tongue, kaveh’s lack of self preservation, alhaitham’s apathy, kaveh’s meddling tendencies, both of their stubborness

they both have a love hate relationship with these traits of yours;

for one, you compliment and contrast them in the important ways, and it’s always a treat for you to show such similarities to them. it makes them feel less alone, more seen.

but then, it’s the same for their roommate, and you end up reminding them of the other.

and that in itself is also good and bad, because despite the fact that they hate each other, that’s still their ex(?) best friend, and those are still the traits that made them fall in love with each other all those years ago (platonically, if you’re not a poly enthusiast.)

anyways, time for fun stuff:

maybe roommate is a researcher that specializes in documentation— specifically, sketching down any relics, sites, fauna and flora etc. etc. that can’t be brought home.

so kaveh is always dragging you into art activities, like those wine painting classes, or simply finding a scenic spot and having a picnic while you do your individual art things together, and alhaitham taking you out to book stores and libraries and cafes.

alhaitham subtly brags about getting to reach his arm around you under the excuse of grabbing a book and sitting close (maybe even low key cuddling depending on how bold you are) to share a book, and hearing your soothing reading voice. and kaveh brags back about one of you holding the other’s hand to demonstrate a specific technique, or him cuddling up to your back to look over your shoulder so he can ‘properly critique’ your work, or the both of you sketching each other.

them trying to subtly influence you to encourage similarities and discourage whatever reminds them of the other.

you just letting them try with a knowing smile :)

you being the referee of their arguments. also saying that you’re staying out of it but instigating anyways

they’ll ask you to judge their debates, and get so smug when you approve or disprove one of their points

them letting the annoying things you do slide but immediately getting on the other’s ass for doing the same thing

teasing kaveh just to see him pout. being only (other) person that could get a rise out of alhaitham

you knowing the best ways to comfort them, show affection, stroke their egos, check their egos, fluster them, and most importantly, piss them off P;

even funnier if roommate is a chaos monger that uses their skills for evil. they will, very occasionally, form a truce just to get you back. y’all have fun.

anywho!! did you ever get a similar brainrot ask with a martial artist!reader? I was just curious, also bc tumblr will occasionally eat my asks

[Roommate AU brainrots]

Hiiii! Yes I got your other ask don't worry. I just haven't had time to reply to it yet since I am a bit on a tight schedule at the moment and wanted to take my time with your brainrots and read them properly 😭

I love this so much! You'd be the perfect counterbalance to either of them.

I'd love to just sit down to draw together with Kaveh. That seems so incredibly comforting and relaxing for some reason. (I also imagine he'd be a red wine guy and I'm a white wine girl so that would be also the perfect contrast for the wine taste haha!). He is my comfort character, don't perceive me, I'm daydreaming 🤭 Also makes me realize I need more artist friends... I have none ;_;

Also going to book stores with Alhaitham? YES. He'd have to drag me out of there at some point because I'm not leaving on my own.

And YES, they'd so brag about what they did together with you to the other guy. They love you but they also have to one up each other constantly lmao.

And about getting in their arguments and them letting it slide when it was you... yep, 100%. Reminds me of that one thing I wrote already called "Cookies". Completely how they'd act.

"Kaveh/Alhaitham did you do XY again" "It was me." "Oh, Y/N? Well, don't worry. I'll take care of it then."

They're down bad BAD.

Thank you for your ask! I loved reading it 🤭

[karokawwo]

I love the resurgence of low-poly graphics they always end up being so much more charming than the hyper realistic stuff aaa studios want to put out

[sigmabateman]

thank you so much @velvetcrowbar444 for tagging me to talk about 5 things im obsessed with at the moment!!

this got longer than i anticipated so im putting it under the cut, but for simplicity's sake i'll tag people up here: @nights-decay, @boycentriccplot, @flaming-tsunami, @sourgelatin no pressure though of course!

persona 5... ok i have to be honest ive been really reluctant to talk about this on here and its why ive been quiet the past at least week or so. no idea why. i guess cause its so different from the stuff i usually post about that i feel like, embarrassed? but i started playing persona 5 royal around may and really liked it but i didnt have the time to properly get into it until now and it has completely taken over my life entirely without me even realising. to be honest i could obsess over like a rock on the ground if i saw it at the right time in my life but hands down persona 5 is one the best if not the best game ive ever played in my life. the story is engaging, the characters are distinctive and realistic and i really really care about all of them, the gameplay is so much fun and combat is buttery fucking smooth like nothing ive ever played before, the music is top tier and what got me interested in the game in the first place, and the ART DIRECTION. it speaks for itself to be honest ESPECIALLY compared to the older games. i was shocked starting persona 4 because of how different it is to persona 5 like, persona 5 has SUCH a distinct visual identity as well as tone, themes, imagery etc it is all just so stunning and perfect and i want to live in it. but i think about it so often like literally 24/7 that i may as well be. i <3 persona 5 and i <3 YUSUKE KITAGAWA. he's definitely my favourite character and he came out of NOWHERE but hes actually everything in the world to me. one of the characters ever.

persona 4 is it a copout to say that? i did try and condense both games into one bullet point but 1. they're such a mainstay in my life right now i was struggling to think of more points and 2. it kind of lost its precision and didn't effectively convey just how personapilled i am right now. i originally wasn't gonna play 4, all i knew is that it was more difficult and less good so i thought i should stay away. but if you go anywhere persona-related on the internet (which i would warn against, the fandom is a fucking cesspit the likes of which i havent seen in a long time as an obscure-shit-enjoyer) you'll quickly run into adachi. and as a lover of men with high-pitched voices and sexypedia entries... i couldn't stay away. before even starting the game i had made a d6 and d20 with different adachis on each face so really it was just a matter of time. and you know what... it's not that bad. the graphics were a SHOCKING step down but i find the low(er) poly style really charming. the adachi model is too cute T_T whenever i see it in the game world i just wanna sit with it for ages. i wonder if i could get it like 3d printed so i could keep him on my desk with me at all times... its bad for me ! the combat is fucking clunky espeically compared to 5 and i kind of hate it but that just makes it more rewarding when i can finally stop LOL. some of the characters (especially the main few (yosuke, chie, yukiko)) took a bit to grow on me but its kind of sweet.. its like authentic.. our relationship is growing as i get to know them better... but dojima and nanako ive loved since i first set eyes on them. too cute. it makes me feel so fatherless. its like.. a lot more magnetic than i expected it to be. i love it even with all its flaws. i saw a meme about it being like twin peaks and thats kind of so real. and you know i love a murder mystery... so yeah tldr i like persona now. but its hard to talk about it on here because it is such a big fandom but not like an active one like spiderman or like good omens or whatever slightly more normal people are watching so its kind of intimidating. maybe ill get over myself, maybe ill go silent for 3 months until i get into something new. we'll see i guess LOL

my gender identity TUMBLR MOMENT I KNOW but i dont know.. ive had a lot of time to myself recently and its kind of brought things to the surface that i just didnt have time or space to think about before. turns out there was a LOT OF STUFF i was repressing without even knowing. like that tweet 'im probably nonbinary but i have a job so idrc about that rn'. i posted on instagram "gender around cis people: boy, gender around trans people: girlboy, gender by myself: computer program" and that kind of sums it up i think. can i coin like.. complicatedgender. where your answer to the question "whats your gender?" is "it's complicated..." cause thats me. its just COMPLICATED okay!!!! but my pronouns havent changed or anything so its chilllllll

going to bed at a reasonable time. i phrased that like a joke answer but its true. i downloaded pokemon sleep and now i go to bed at 11:30pm cause at 11 i get a notification saying my pokemon are sleepy and shit i gotta take care of my pokemon!! i dont even know if its doing me any good to be honest like i dont feel much better when i wake up but making myself get into bed and shut my eyes means more thinking time and to be honest my favourite activity is thinking. even if as silly as it sounds i never give myself time to do it. its playing a weirdly big role in my life rn so yeah id say im obsessed with it!!!

this asmr video. im secretly always posting about asmr so really i could just say that, but like, ASMR | The Mortician (No Talking – You're Dead) specifically is such a mainstay i can feel its influence seeping into my life like an infection. this video would actually show up in my recommended for YEARS but i never watched it. gave me a major ick for some reason. but then i got into this guys stuff and saw it again and thought id give it a go and now its like an extra limb. fuck my 3rd bullet point, this is my gender identity. i could not articulate in words what it is about the mortician that i love so much, but i really really do. i am certifiably obsessed. cant believe i made it through this whole thing without mentioning alex. but there you are. yay this was fun :D

[northwest-cryptid]

I don't collect many things, but of the things I do collect I think the most surreal is physical Mabinogi merch.

To explain Mabinogi is an MMORPG that came out in 2008 and I've been playing it ever since beta. I'd argue it has plenty of charm and enough reason even now in 2023 for anyone with even some slight interest in it to give it a shot however to me (and to my partner) it has a special place. Not only is it how my partner and I met, but it's literally a game I have played for 15 years now; considering I'm 28 that's over half my entire life.

As you might imagine back in middle school and even early high school I didn't really have a lot of money, let alone the understanding of how to order things from overseas. So a very niche MMORPG didn't necessarily have a lot of merch out and about. While most kids at my school had Pokémon backpacks or some kind of Anime plastered on their shirt (normally Naruto or Dragonball) I never had physical merch. So I was always that annoying kid who had to verbally tell you how much I liked my dumb special interest.

To give you an idea of how much this game was a part of my life, my mother once bought me an actual copy of the Mabinogion, like; the book that the game is loosely based on, it's entirely in Welsh and my mom also gave me a dictionary to translate it, I was stoked about this; I was in early high school walking around with a black book with a red symbol on the front speaking in Welsh as you can imagine this did not make me popular and cool.

Now my partner and I collect actual official merch, just last year we acquired a few magazines, guide books, and even manga. It's incredible to behold such a snapshot of time from when this was all still new and popular.

This is a guide book from back when the slogan for the game was still "fantasy life" it would later become "anime life" and a few other things; but this is the one I remember from my childhood:

We were really excited to look through this and translate it, more over we were taken aback by the system requirements listed in the guide book, I mean just check out these specs!

The funniest part is that there was a time at which I was getting a new laptop because I had to travel and I specifically gave the guy at Bestbuy this almost exact rundown for the specs I needed. This was of course because my plan was to install Mabi on it, which I did. However I had a hard time explaining to anyone why I wanted these sort of specs specifically without saying "uh so I can play an extremely niche online game from Korea?"

We also got books that were literally Item and databooks which had full lists of items you could obtain in the game as well as what races and genders could use them:

This was an absolute trip down nostalgia lane for us.

I cannot stress just how cool it was to flip through these pages and go "oh shit I had those, oh I remember that! Remember this? Yea it was from an event, damn that was a long time ago; oh god I'm old."

It's crazy to see just how much detail and effort went into these! I didn't even know they existed, if I was aware of these back in school I'd have gone ballistic over them like, check this out there's entire pages dedicated to Generation 1:

of course the merch pages caught our eye looking over all the stuff we have yet to hunt down for our collection

These books are great and I personally love the manga, illustrations of the world that I've only ever seen as low poly PMGs is such a sight to behold as a long time fan.

However you may notice something, there's not a ton of physical merch. Sure there's books and manga, and it seems like at one point there were standees and a few figures, posters, and mugs; but these days getting your hands on the rarer merch can be difficult and not to mention expensive.

That's sort of why we excitedly took matters into our own hands, slowly and methodically recreating the game's PMG models as OBJs we can actually print from our 3D printer. It's not easy but it's totally worth it.

I know this probably sounds REALLY stupid to you, and I wouldn't blame you for laughing at me for it; but the fact that I have played this game for 15 years; and today I held a 3D printed figure of a Golem in my fucking hands has me feeling a certain kind of way that's hard to explain. Knowing I could print figures of our characters, our favorite NPCs, not to mention entire dungeons and create dioramas of our favorite places from a game that means so much to me is genuinely mind boggling.

I think the part of all this that still has me in disbelief is that if you asked me what I wanted when I was a depressed 16 year old in school who came home and immediately jumped on Mabi; I'd 100% tell you that I just want to live alone with a partner who enjoyed Mabi and maybe a few cats. Now I'm 28 living with a partner who I not only met via this game but who is actually significantly better than me at it lol; we also have 3 cats and our home is slowly but surely being decorated with more and more Mabinogi crafts. I don't mean to sound like my life revolves around this game, though I admit I do laugh when my partner breaks out her signature slogan of "Mabinogi is Real Life" but I guess in a sense it just feels like I've fucking made it you know? I did it, I finally got the life I was longing for and while it may not feel real; every day this sort of thing happens makes it a littler harder to deny that I'm living the dream. I'm far from rich and I'm far from healthy; and I don't exactly have a great career or anything sure, but I think 16 year old me would be happy with the way I turned out.

[octahedral-chaos]

Okay so it's the new year, so I decided to make a pretty long post with shoutouts to a bunch of blogs that I love, whether general art stuff, funny stuff or science! I also made a masterpost of cool blogs on @octastims and @spritebloom as well! Let's get into it!

@aria-greenhoodie : Very cool artist with LOTS of awesome object head ocs, angel ocs and more! Also very rad in that they really like eldritch angels.

@shirecorn : Made lots of somewhat famous memes on Tumblr (High Geologist, etc). Also have a very good turtorial on making better fictional animal hybrids.

@agentkirin : Awesome art style AND is making a game with a very cute hippalectryon protag! Please follow because I think Ashes to Ashlyn should be a reality.

@min-play : AWESOME art style and very charming designs + characters! Also think the fact that you want to get a Dancerush Stardom cabinet is rad. 11/10 go for it! That looks like a really fun arcade game!

@tk-sketches : Adorable robot designs and a really good comic series!

@lowpolyparrot : Very awesome low poly models AND drawings! Also very rad in general.

@meanya : Runs two stimblogs, a art prompt blog AND several other sideblogs! Very rad and 11/10 go check out neon-glowing-rainbow.

@sunnibits : Makes really cool stimboards, have PEAK aesthetic and posts a LOT about their blorbos. 11/10 it's worth it.

@christerious : OCTAHEDRON (and other indie games) speedrunner. Holds the current world record and makes awesome chiptune covers + originals. Also post funny stuff.

@charseraph : AWSOME spec evo stuff AND the crowns are adorable. Most pettable sophont design EVER.

@delta-hexagon : INCREDIBLE alien + creature designs and awesome art style. Also have a very cute sona.

@alexriesart : Awesome spec evo and worldbuilding stuff! Vividly remember unintentionally coming across their art on Deviantart back in mid 2010s and falling in love with the birrins.

@revretch/ @humansbgone : AWESOME bug posts, biology stuff and rad series about big sapient bugs! What's not to love?

@todaysbat and @loveisinthebat : Both posts about bats! They're absolutely awesome with lots of batty stuff, whether real bats, ways to help bats or art pieces with bats!

@fyanimaldiversity : Blog about mutations + colour morphs in animals. Surprisingly useful for spec evo stuff, especially with genetics.

@odd-animals-daily : Blog about weird and wacky creatures! You can browse here if you want to get wild ideas for creature and alien designs.

@mothmyspace : Lots of cool moth species! Really good for unique fairies/ bug based ocs!

@ultrainfinitepit : Cool angel designs and very cool art style! Also hosts angeltober.

@lesserkey : Also draw angels! Very rad art style and angel designs.

@strayhorn: Very cool writer who have a bunch of writing/ worldbuilding tips! Absolutely great for anyone who's slightly intimated with their first story.

[radellama]

Games I played in 2022

Well… what a year. Pleased to announce that I actually played some good games this year! And some terrible ones too! And also… I made a game! And graduated! Everything happened all at once, but I at least had the foresight to write down the games I played so I don’t have to stand and look at my bookshelf while trying to remember which games I actually played this year. Some of the games I played are repeat entries from previous years, however I feel that my experience with the games is different enough to warrant writing about them again, and you’ll see why. It would be nice to replay a few games and do comparative analysis/reviews based on what I’ve said in previous years, but I can only really do that with one game I played this year, so I’ll tackle re-reviews another time.

As with the others, I’ll try not to completely spoil stuff, but I do want to go in depth with some things- so you have been warned.

~~~

Spyro 2: Gateway to Glimmer

I don’t know why I forgot to put this in previous year’s entries, as I usually replay it every summer in Dec/Jan. Safe to say, I adore this game. 

I think it was at the start of this year that I played a private stream in discord with a few friends, it was super fun just chatting on the virtual couch and showing friends how charming the game is. I’m certainly not opposed to streaming on twitch for my next playthrough of this either :P

Spyro 2 is the best in the og trilogy- it builds upon the foundations laid in the first game, but is an overall tighter and more focused play than the third game. There’s classic characters with incredible (campy/bad) voice acting that is just iconic at this point, a simple but effective story, and charming places to visit on your journey to gather all the talismans and complete the collectathon. I’ve loved this game since I was a kid, so I know this game almost inside and out, and I could hum pretty much the entire soundtrack from memory. I also really love the low poly ps1 era look if I’m being honest, to me it is just as charming as that 16-32 bit pixel art style and deserves to be appreciated in all of its janky glory!

Game starts with Spyro wanting to take a holiday to get away from the doom and gloom of bad weather, but The Professor intercepts you while you are travelling through a portal and asks you to help. See, Ripto has recently taken over the place, and the people need your help to kick his butt! They promise that they’ll help you get to Dragon Shores to enjoy your holiday if you help them by collecting enough Talismans and orbs to fight Ripto. There’s three hub worlds to travel through, all with a variety of levels, a speedway and secret orbs to collect. Each level you play through has a main mission, which is usually very simple and consists of going from point A to point B in order to unlock the exit portal and get the Talisman- but each level also has a side quest or two that provide an opportunity to collect orbs. Sidequest might be the wrong term for it, as they’re mostly minigame-esque - things like lighting up gem lamps, feeding fish to idols, semi-elaborate fetch quests, stopping a crazed penguin chef from cooking baby turtles, helping children terrorists, playing hockey with some monks, that kind of thing. Each level and hub world also has a set amount of gems littering the place, and you can collect them all easily with the help of your dragonfly buddy, Sparx. Sparx is a real g, he takes hits for you and changes colour to indicate your health, and not only helps to collect nearby gems as you walk around, but holding the L1+R1 buttons will make him face the direction of the closest gems. Really helpful for when you’re trying to 100% an area and there’s one pesky gem hidden in a corner that you missed.

The main gameplay for this game is simple 3D platforming, and you have the ability to charge into a run, breathe fire and glide to assist you. Most enemies are really basic, and can be killed with either fire or a charge attack. Small enemies can usually be taken down with either, but bigger enemies can deflect your charge attacks and enemies with metal can absorb your flame attacks. Super simple stuff, you don’t need to think too hard about the enemies in most levels and instead spend most of your time exploring levels and seeing what they have to offer. 

At the end of each hub world, there is a boss to fight- working your way up from Ripto’s henchmen, Crush and Gulp, until you can fight the villain himself. Upon defeating Ripto in a boss battle that (mostly) tests your skill and understanding of the game mechanics in a final showdown, you’re treated to playing through Dragon Shores!

I love when there’s a bit of fun content after the main plot, it’s hard to say no to a nice reward! There’s a handful of nice carnival games to play, like a dunk tank, whack a mole type game, a love boat ride, and my personal favourite, the rollercoaster. If you collect every collectable in the game, there’s also a permanent powerup you can access that allows you to blast through levels. I do remember the powerup being active when I restarted a save on the reignited trilogy, and I had to toggle it off to play normally- but I can’t recall if that’s the case in the og one. Either way, it is pretty fun to have a supercharged power up as a reward for completing everything, as is mucking around in dragon shores.

To close, I really love this game haha. Although I enjoyed the reignited trilogy, I found that there were too many nitpicky changes that were made for my nostalgic tastes- making me always want to return to the og. It’s tiny things, like the monks in colossus doing their ‘waiyayaiyaiyum’ chanting being changed to a cliche ‘ooohhmmmm’ that sucks, adjusting/taking out some of the cutscenes at the start and end of levels to omit the implications of casual murder, changing the voice actor for the Romeo+Juliet mission to a female and male voice actor when it used to be two males… nitpicky stuff that if you hadn’t played the og’s and don’t care (as I so clearly do) you probably wouldn’t notice. It’s not a perfect game by any means, but it is in my heart. Love you Spyro 2 <3

Gateway to Glimmer Forest - https://youtu.be/PEM-pYocKnI  

Colossus - https://youtu.be/-AiVIRplYSs 

Zephyr - https://youtu.be/xVKYvtzhZP8 

~~~

Donkey Kong Country 2

Ahh, a childhood classic. I was feeling nostalgic this year - something you’ll note in a lot of my games as you go down the list - and it was nice playing this again. I also found out that I never finished the game as a kid! There were still like two whole worlds I had never seen before, I have no clue how I missed them but! Yeah! I got a two for one, revisiting an old fave AND new content lmao.

The game still feels tight; I like the way it controls, especially in the later levels where it really pushes your skill level and mastery of its system. Diddy and Dixie are both great to play as, and throughout various stages you get animal companions to either ride or play as. Not all animal companions are created equally, though, as some are really frustrating to play as. Looking at you, Rattly.

I didn’t 100% this, I’ve decided to put it down and call it a wrap for the year with just the bonus world left. It’s really hard, and I like that about this game, but I need to call it at some stage so I can write these! I might continue playing over new years just for my personal satisfaction, but I’m already fine with having gone through the whole thing again and bashing K. Rool (with only one time that I looked up a walkthrough, muscle memory and perseverance through the rest!)

I’m not too sure what else to say if I’m being honest- this was more of a quick playthrough for nostalgia and stress relief while I was in my last weeks of uni. It still holds up to my nostalgic views, the visuals and music are still banging, and I had fun. There are tiny nitpicks I have, like some of the levels near the end not feeling all that coherent with the rest of the game, and the coins don’t seem to save when you close and reopen the game- grinding to get lives and having like 30-something banana coins when I save turning into 0 when I load my file sucked a bit when I wanted to save or hang out with Cranky :/ But I got over it, and I’ll definitely play this again in future lol.

Stickerbrush Symphony - https://youtu.be/mdPlcKg-qFs

Fonky the Main Monkey - https://youtu.be/CUsb2LvSmfM

Snakey Chantey - https://youtu.be/Mr2cFY_3PT0 

~~~

Donkey Kong Country 3

Another childhood classic! This one I know for a fact that I completed as a kid, multiple times in fact. And I completed it again early this year! Fully too, like all the bonus world and all the banana birds and shit. Good fun.

This game is interesting, it is so different to the previous two while still being very much a dkc game. Going from having two light and snappy characters (Dixie and Diddy) in 2 to now having one heavy character (Kiddy) is a bit odd at first, but I have to admit, the level design and character movement felt like the best iteration of the three dkc games. I don’t usually care if sequels have nice refinements, that’s a given in most cases and doesn’t- or shouldn’t- affect my opinion on the game. But for this game? I dunno, it really just feels good when you master it, and I think after playing some form of dkc for most of this year, I enjoyed the levels here the most. Maybe that is childhood nostalgia, maybe it’s a more objective look during this playthrough- who knows. 

What I do know is that this game is super fun, and I felt a much stronger connection to the world as I traversed through it. I think this is in part due to the overworld being more interactive, having a boat to traverse between each section- but I also think the connection with NPCs and the addition of ‘sidequests’ really helped the game feel uniquely like home. I use the term sidequest loosely here, as its more fetch quests and gathering collectibles that you’ll probably collect anyway, but it’s fun going around and meeting all the bears and talking with them. I also really enjoyed the bosses in this game- they truly feel like the final evolution of what the previous two games were establishing. The levels and bosses feel so stand out and memorable to me, and I really enjoyed all the extra little things like the bonus barrels and the circus tent with cranky. Even smaller details, like each level displaying a flag once you’ve completed it, and it being colour coded to tell you which monkey completed the level and if you got all the bonus content- that's so cool. 

This is just gushing, but I can’t help it. I like this game, and it feels so cozy. I like going through all the worlds and feeling such a clear sense of progression, I like chatting with all the bears and helping/pissing them off, I like the unique bosses, I like seeing Wrinkly Kong chilling in her little cave and seeing it fill up with all the banana birds I rescue, and I LOVE revealing the ‘secret’ on the overworld. The story and stakes might not have been as drastic as the previous iterations, but there’s just something so appealing about this game. I can’t really articulate it much more than this, but I did see a really interesting video essay about this game a couple of months after I finished it - highly recommend checking it out as it brings up some interesting points in regards to how unique this game is.

As far as nitpicks go, again I feel some of the later levels near the end game feel a bit out of place (and I do NOT like the rocket level at the end >:( ), I can’t remember if it saved lives and coins between saving and reopening or not- if it didn’t that still sucks! But overall, the changes made here feel fine- it’s a unique game and a nice way to round off the trilogy.

I’ll leave it at that, with the final note of how this game has one really important core memory for me. When I was around 6-8, I remember struggling to get past the bees to enter the bonus barrel in the first rat warehouse level, and my dad introduced me to the concept of patience. It’s so simple, but it blew my tiny mind that I could do things differently if I stopped and waited for a moment, and that it might be the best way to do what I want. To this day, when I’m feeling really impatient and am able to catch myself, I call myself out by mentally replaying that section of the game, and making my way past the bees to get to the bonus barrel. This game means a lot to me lmao

Swanky’s Sideshow - https://youtu.be/Es4yf387pmM

Mill Fever - https://youtu.be/OWmd5dGN5Ns

Water World - https://youtu.be/N3aTwCvbbaQ

~~~

Animal Crossing: Wild World

As soon as I booted up the game for the first time, and heard the title music, a huge wave of nostalgia washed over me- so it’s safe to say this is a really biased look back. I went with my tradition of naming my town Cessabit, and after exiting my taxi and landing in my new home, I got to work. I actually really like the early stage where you’re working for Nook, and I will NOT tolerate any slander towards him. He is an earnest and kind tanuki who helps you get your bearings with no time limits, you all wish you had someone like that in your life!

Guess what? MORE NOSTALGIA!

I played a couple of minutes of New Horizons with my sibling here and there at the start of the year when they were staying with me, and I just found myself missing older entries in the series. I stuck with Wild World for a good couple of months, and didn’t time travel or anything. Just playing raw Animal Crossing Wild World. The graphics looked a bit crunchier than I remembered on the ds, but they still have a certain charm that I like. 

After completing the Nook tutorial, I was off on my own, and began doing what I could to earn enough and start living that animal crossing life. I got all my tools, worked towards filling out my encyclopedia and donating everything to the museum, and started breeding lovely flowers to decorate my neighbours houses. I was very glad that Chief was in my town- he’s one of my favourite villagers, so I’d hang out and make sure to chat with him every day. 

One thing I noticed, that was refreshing to see after the sour taste left by NH, was the variety and types of holidays in Wild World. There’s standard ones like the fishing and bug tourney, where you have to try and get the biggest catch of the town by the end of the day- but there are also things like the flower festival, the acorn festival, and other little ones like la-di-day. I also loved when it was time for the flea market, I’d set up my house like a little shop of second hand furniture ready to go and enjoy selling the stuff I didn’t want so I could afford to buy some stuff from my neighbours. Little things like these were so much fun when I was a kid, and I had so much fun reliving them this time around. I appreciated the effort the developers went to in making the holidays not culturally or regionally specific, so as not to alienate anyone who isn’t immediately familiar with the celebrations. You as the player get to understand the holidays while the townsfolk share the festivities, it felt nice. 

The only thing I couldn’t do to complete this experience was play with others in multiplayer. When I was younger, my sister and I would stay up late and play under the covers together from our bedrooms, giving each other gifts and mucking around in each other’s towns. It was extra fun when we got to see our cousin, as he also had a copy and it was really fun to make self imposed challenges for fishing and bug catching and hide and seek, pooling together to give the winner a prize. I also used to be a bit of a shit and dig holes to make mazes across town and force my sister and cousin to play through a certain set of events before I let them free- this was also something I did when I was younger on my own, I’d trap villagers into little spaces I’d dug and push them together so I could see their conversations/piss them off and watch them stomp in a tiny area. It was hours worth of effort to dig that much, for such a small ‘reward,’ - but that’s kinda the spirit of animal crossing. You accumulate hours playing in small chunks to only have mundane rewards, but it’s nice. 

I stopped playing when I missed two days in a row of playing due to uni work and I opened up to see that Chief had left me, and I was so sad. That’s another integral part of the animal crossing experience - the villagers you wanted to stay would always be trying to leave, and the annoying ugly bitch ass fuckers would never leave!

Overall, I really enjoyed this revisit of animal crossing- the term I was going through at the time was the absolute worst one in my entire bachelor's, so playing during class and just before bed was really helping me keep sane. There’s a whole stack of things that make the game mildly miserable to play, like having to donate each item individually to Blathers in the museum and hearing the whole info dump every time, along with not having any indication that you’ve already donated something… just to name one. 

As much as I love this game, I wouldn’t recommend it to newcomers unless I knew for sure they’d be able to understand and appreciate the context of the game. I have so many childhood memories attached to this game, and just recounting a small handful of the ones that I hold dearly would be a whole separate post that wouldn’t mean much to the rest of you, cause they’re MY nostalgic memories, not yours lmao. I loved playing again, but did find myself yearning for the few quality of life updates that were added in future instalments. Overall though, for the second game in the franchise, and the first handheld instalment- great fun!

Plus it has the best soundtrack + the movie is based loosely on this game and is really cute >:)

Title Screen - https://youtu.be/xllH3Zrcbz0 

The Roost - https://youtu.be/DDRKhw6fhyY

6pm - https://youtu.be/X9G6gBCt6T0

~~~

Animal Crossing: New Leaf

I don’t have as strong a nostalgia for NL if I’m being honest, but damn what a nice animal crossing game. I remember the first time I played as a teen and having reservations about the changes, especially in the soundtrack and certain game mechanics, but overall it is such a nice animal crossing game. THIS is the one I would recommend as an entry point to the series if you’ve never played and want to check it out. The mechanics have been refined, and everything is generally very pleasant to play- it has really boiled down the exact animal crossing formula and added a new look and feel to it while still being familiar. 

I love the additions to this game as well, though it took me a while to warm up to them as a teen, they really just make the game extra nice. I like that you can stack fruit in your pockets, and that there’s more furniture and clothing to collect, and cycling between tools by pressing the dpad is amazing! There’s new npc’s to fall in love with, and having control of the town via mayoral duties is really nice. It’s super fun curating the town to look the way you want- I have so much fun putting down tiles and creating nice pathways that lead to nicely placed buildings and bridges. Autism heaven. The only things I really wanna nitpick here are the fact that there’s less pocket space and that new villagers just plop their houses WHEREVER THEY WANT. 

Back in the day, I spent real life WEEKS trying to breed blue roses, and finally got one! One single blue rose! And I was trying to breed it to make more so I could start mass breeding blue ones and add them to my rainbow of roses! ALL FOR THAT BITCH ASS CLOWN PIETRO TO PLONK HIS HOUSE DIRECTLY ON THE ONLY FUCKING BLUE ROSE IN TOWN WHICH DESTROYED IT FOR GOOD AND I HAD TO START BREEDING FROM FUCKING SCRATCH. I HATE THAT FUCKING CLOWN SOOOOO MUCH. Flower breeding is probably the only other real gripe I have- I do not give a flying fuck about flower genetics and needing some arbitrary system that seems as much down to rng as it is to genetics just to get a nice colour. I want to make a gay town with rainbow roses bordering all my footpaths, just let me have the colours. It only gets worse in NH… I spent actual real life MONTHS slowly trying to breed blue roses as I played... Wild world had it right- just put a black and purple rose together and you’re sure to get blue eventually! It used to be about colour combos, I think in WW it was 3 base colours and 5 hybrid colours for roses, that’s epic! And they made some kind of sense, not this bullshit where you need to have bred the roses from particular flowers over a long system to get a colour… fuck you.

Anyway, back to NL. As a 3DS game the graphics held up really well in my opinion. Everything is so cute and having a better depth perception in general is nice (and that’s without the 3D enabled, it’s cool but hurts my eyes so I never really used it). The big changes for this game are that you are the mayor and have more direct control over the town, that most of the shops are now in a main street above the town, and the addition of the island. I already touched on the mayor thing, and if you know NH you know the general deal for it here. The main street is an interesting choice, but it was one of the changes I didn’t immediately turn my nose at when I first played as a teen. That’s because it’s really cool to see your progress as you open more shops and the place gets more lively. In WW, you only really upgraded Nook’s as you progressed, but now you can upgrade Nook’s AND unlock a whole strip of places to shop at and hang out in. The museum is really nice too, they really stepped up in making it an even nicer place to visit. And, with the expanded encyclopedia, there’s plenty to collect and donate. Unlocking the shops all felt pretty natural and related- there were standard things like ‘when you’ve shopped a certain amount at Nooks, it’ll expand,’ and ‘if you get your fortune enough times, Katrina will open up shop,’ - but there are other things like getting to know Dr Shrunk and having to get villagers to sign a petition to open up a nightclub, and having certain shops opened via fundraising. It really helped create that community feel that’s important in an animal crossing game, a feeling that I think peaked here and was unfortunately lost in NH. Here, while you are in charge of major decisions for the layout and look of town, and the villagers contribute jack shit to the fundraisers as always, it felt like you were making a town FOR the town. In NH, having more control is super nice, especially when you want to get creative with it, but due to it having less interaction with the villagers in this manner, it feels disconnected and more like it’s for your benefit only, not the town/island’s. Plus, the main street being accessible right at the top of your town, only a short walk across the train tracks away is good. A huge improvement to the shopping district in Let’s Go To The City on Wii, which requires you to catch the bus every time you visit :/

The last big addition to this game is the island. I believe there was an earlier iteration of this idea with the gamecube -> gameboy linking thingy, but I didn’t experience the gamecube era so it was funky fresh to me. When you unlock it, there’s new fruits and bugs and flowers and fish- even a new tool/ability, diving! It’s super cool to see things expanded upon this way, and you get an island as a secondary place to curate the way you want. I would always take out all the flowers and shrubs, leaving only the banana trees and placing bananas over every single tile on the island so that it could guarantee a higher spawn rate for bugs and beetles that were mad expensive. 

At night on the island, big bugs and sharks can spawn, and defacing the island in the manner I just described makes it so that those bugs are pretty much the only things to spawn, apart from one or two other bugs that are super common and spawn regardless. Spending an hour or so catching bugs and filling up the max inventory to take home, paired with the bell boom ordinance, means that you can get a solid 200-400 bells per trip. Also, the music on the island at night is just gorgeous, so it was really nice to just unwind before bed and hear that calming music while catching bugs and sharks before returning home and saving for the night. When I babysat as a teen, once the kids were in bed I’d stay up late for the parents and grind on the island like that while chatting with friends online- it was super nice. 

ANOTHER thing the island added- yes, there’s more -is the inclusion of mini games! You can play them by yourself or with friends via local/online play. You can do games that are effectively fishing and bug tourneys- but with special rules, mazes where you have to collect certain fruits, a whack a mole type of thing, balloon shooters, hide and seek - so much to play! When you do well, you get a currency that’s only used on the island and the chance to unlock intermediate and expert versions of the same games, higher stakes for higher rewards! The inclusion of these were super awesome, as when you played with friends, you weren’t limited to making up your own games with your friend until you ran out of things to do- as there are literally games to play on the island! I didn’t play much online back in the day, and I didn’t at all on this replay, but that was a fun thing from its time. 

The last major thing I want to mention, was that this game had a MASSIVE FREE UPDATE, adding the ‘welcome amiibo’ subtitle to the game. I remember when this came out back in the day, it was an unexpected but very pleasant surprise, and expanded on the already large amount of content in the game. You could use amiibo things to do amiibo stuff - I didn’t really play this shit cause I only have a pixel mario amiibo lol. But when you summon someone, they appear in a little camper van in Harv’s camp, alongside non-villager npcs with unique furniture you can order. They added another set of in-game currency, used in the shop and campervans at Harv’s, and you can earn currency by doing ‘dailies’ that you were probably already doing. This was nice, as it was an optional incentive to do things each day/week when you’re feeling a little directionless after having pretty much completed your town aesthetic. Things like picking weeds, sending letters, talking to villagers- the Nook Phone shit from NH originated here! I can’t remember if there was anything else major with this update- apart from the addition of BEING ABLE TO SIT ON ROCKS AND STUMPS!!! That was a BIG FUCKEN DEAL back in the day ahah.

Playing again reminded me of why I loved playing AC to begin with, and made my gripes towards NH even stronger. There was just so much missing from the base of NH when it came out, and pairing that with the annoyingly drip fed updates, content that was removed and having to pay for the DLC… Yeowch. I loved playing NH, but only for a short while. Playing NL, I loved it the whole time. I haven’t checked my NH game in months, but to my understanding, there are STILL things that were present in the base of this 3DS game that are absent in NH- which is very strange considering that game is about living on an island.

Overall, playing this again was so fucking lovely. Even though I don’t have as strong a nostalgia for this game, I still love it nostalgically and even more after this replay - it is The Quintessential Animal Crossing Experience™ in my opinion. Although I stand by the fact that the WW soundtrack is better (:P) there are so many lovely songs here, and the general vibe is so uniquely New Leaf- I struggled picking songs so you get 4, with the recommendation of checking out the rest of the ost if you are so inclined >:)

Tortimer Island (Night) - https://youtu.be/oikomQB2Hac 

11am - https://youtu.be/8MHC3Q7LQ20  

1pm - https://youtu.be/8g54wrI5mNU 

7pm - https://youtu.be/dqSn-tJRbhc 

~~~

Miitopia (DS)

What a strange and funny game. It’s a weird RPG-lite style game centred around your Miis, and I had a good time. I do think that a massive part of why I enjoyed this was due to having brain rot for chrono, so all my characters were chrono ones+my oc harland as my main mii man. And all extra npc types were star trek characters. Lol. 

If you haven’t got funny ideas for friends or blorbos to put in this game, I think a huge part of the charm is lost- however, if you get a kick out of seeing your Miis travelling and fighting monsters and getting to know each other every night when they sleep at the inns- you’re sure to have a great time.

One thing I am surprised by is just how long this game is. I’ve been playing for most of the year on and off, and I’m STILL not at the end. It feels like an endless game lmao, but that is in part due to me replaying each level over and over until each path has been taken. I could say it was for the completionist in me, but it was actually about getting more chances for my Miis to get closer at night the more I travelled. Completing the maps was just a nice excuse >:)

The story is very simple. The big baddie (Matt, from Wii Sports in my case) stole a bunch of people’s faces, and you agree to traverse the land, gain party members, and retrieve everyone’s faces! I think it’s actually a pretty clever way to make the plot revolve around the Miis, and there’s a certain wit and charm to this game that made it super fun. I loved a lot of the cheeky dialogue, and the little ‘random thoughts’ the party members will have while you’re running across the levels. It was very funny when it was something that a particular character would not say, but even funnier when they totally would say that. My best example is Magus saying he ‘needs kitty cuddles’ while on a very long adventure, he both would and would not say that. I love it.

As far as gameplay goes, it's super simple, hence why I’d say it's RPG-lite. Classic RPG turn based battle system, it’s very simple and hard to mess up, but it also has an autoplay feature. I just left the autoplay on during every battle, as I just didn’t feel inspired enough by the simple choices to actually make calculated decisions. It was more fun for me to autoplay and speed it up, paying more attention to the things the Miis were saying and how they were reacting to each other getting hit. This made it a semi-idle experience for me, not the worst thing in the world, but it meant that I’d only be paying partial attention while playing at work or while watching youtube essays in the evenings to unwind. 

Because it’s so simple, I don’t have much more to say. It has a certain wit, one that vaguely reminded me of things I liked about Paper Mario, and it was really funny playing with blorbos in this virtual-dollhouse-rpg game. If this sounds fun, and you have some Mii characters in mind, I’d say check it out! Just keep in mind that it goes on for a really long time, and you’ll have like 10 party members towards the end + a plethora of npc Miis to make/use. I feel the experience is a bit wasted if you haven’t got some Miis in mind, but it’s still a good time regardless. I may or may not see it to the end, but for now I’m fine with calling it done while I’m at the ‘final missions from townsfolk’ stage. Surely I’m just a quest or two away from the real ending, but whatever. I had fun while it lasted.

Getting Changed - https://youtu.be/VNFG451FY_U 

In That Holiday Mood - https://youtu.be/4BaNOx_-azA 

Title: Greenhorne - https://youtu.be/37Oq7Rb_m10 

~~~ 

Aragami 2

Whoo boy. Um, I have a lot to say about this game. I’m also going to go pretty heavy into spoilers for this one cause. I need to talk about this.

As you may or may not remember from a previous goty thingy, I talked about how much I LOVED the first Aragami. This sequel… I knew it was going to be different, but damn it sucks so much… And I completed the whole thing…

So, where to begin… 

Lets start with looks. This one has a more ‘realistic’ look, forgoing the stylisation found in the first game. They made the main Aragami that you play as looks really buff and shit, and they look solid. As in, solid and not wispy or smokey or shadowy, despite being a vengeful shadow spirit. They look like a generic buff assassin dude but with grey skin. I don’t really like it. The hub world that you can muck around in between missions is pretty I guess, but the levels themselves felt kinda empty and amateurish to me. While some of the later levels were quite elaborate with large city structures to leap across and mining caves and the like- a lot of levels just have an infinite plane of water as far as the horizon. To me, that took away so much of the atmosphere and made it feel like an ameture attempt at making a level. Both this and the first Aragami were made in Unity, but this game REALLY felt like it was made in Unity, but in a bad way. The new direction just felt so odd, it barely held onto any of the choices or aesthetics that made the first game feel so charming to me in the first place- scrapping it for more ‘realism’ at the expense of character within the environment and models. It makes it look like every other 3D game ever, and makes me disconnect from it. 

Another place they lost me was with the level design itself. I mentioned a hub world earlier, and I hate the hub world if I’m being honest. It’s just huge and feels empty and when you have to talk with NPCs you need to leap and run across the whole area and it just feels crap. There’s nothing to really do, just visit a shop or dojo and talk with NPCs. There are notable ones, who actually have something more than the other copy-pasted background ones have to say- but even they aren’t memorable at all. You’d think having like a million bland Aragami walking around and wailing at how sad and shit it is to be one would make unique characters stand out. But no, it all just felt to me as though the developers went ‘oh, this worked in [insert almost any other 3D game], let’s do it here’ and fell into all the cliches instead of actually doing what might work better for this game. Every time you do a mission, you need to go to the mission board and enter the level, and when you complete it you’re spat back out into the hub world to chat with the NPCs and unlock the next mission. Being spat back and forth between levels and hub world like this just made me feel even more disconnected from the game and general plot. Not to mention, you revisit the same levels over and over, just with different mission parameters - so everything just feels the same! Because it literally is!

The general plot was confusing and not very good as well. The first game’s plot was VERY simple, but there was a clear understanding of where you needed to go, what you needed to do and why during most of the game. In this one? I had no clue what was going on for too much of the beginning, and then when I thought I had kinda wrapped my head around it, more convoluted shit started happening and it kept losing me. I don’t really know what happened or why in Aragami 2, and I played the whole thing. It was more bland and confusing than RE6, and that sucks…

Though in general the plot was shit, there were a few stand out moments that made me really wish there was a better director handling the narrative elements. As in the previous game, the objective is to be stealthy and traverse through the level, and you can choose whether you aim to be noticed by no one, kill no one, or kill everyone. It gives flexibility, and a fun incentive to try different playstyles for those looking to master the game. Here, due to the levels being separate missions, you had objectives like killing certain people, smuggling supplies, doing some recon and gathering specific items ect ect. The way most players will go through the levels won’t be a kill everyone route- at least not on the first playthrough -due to you being one hit killed if you get attacked. One addition to this game is the ability to defend yourself and parry attacks if you play correctly, A- I disagree on this design choice as it makes it too much of an action game and destroys the stakes in the stealth and B- parrying attacks barely works! I know for a fact I hit the buttons it wanted me to, but it’d behave so poorly and I’d die anyway! Anyway, you’re not going to be killing everyone, it’s a long and tedious task in most levels, and some have something like 80-100 enemies in the level. This made one moment really stand out, it was the highlight of the game for me, and it makes me so frustrated that this wasn’t played upon more!

So, you’re a shadow spirit or something, (and you can’t really rely on your knowledge of Aragami from the previous game’s lore, because it’s different) and you’re part of a whole race of Aragami shadow spirits. There’s some Aragami stuck as slaves and prisoners for the enemy, and there’s some plot I couldn’t follow or understand about a rival? Or something? Point being, you go on missions to various places across the valley, and most of your missions involve getting info on the enemies planned attacks, smuggling or sabotaging supplies and whatever other efforts are needed to help your fellow shadow spirit people. There’s some kind of crystal that can trap an Aragami’s soul and make the wearer of the crystal control them (I think?) and there’s a level where you try to sneak into the mines where the enemy are mining for the crystal. When you get deep into the caves, you come across a bunch of Aragami frozen like statues and it’s pretty unsettling. When you exit that area, you find every enemy in the level has died. If you were like me, you might have killed one or two enemies, but tried to hide them if they were in obvious areas - so to see EVERYONE laying DEAD out in the OPEN was REALLY UNNERVING. You’re one of the only people that’s known to be strong and skilled enough to wipe out an entire map like this, and even then- it’s fucking hard to do so! You have to walk out of the mines and back out into the village area while wading through fallen enemies, until a cutscene plays of the people who killed everyone. I think they were looking for you as well, but you’re just left on that creepy note and report back to the village chief at home. I was so lost on the game up till that point, and it had me ready to put everything aside and genuinely interested to see what was going to happen next- all for it to go right back to the same, boring, disconnected routine of hubworld to mission! LIKE COME ONNNN THAT WAS EERIE AS HELL AND I LIKED IT! MADE THE THREAT FEEL SO REAL AND I WAS WORRIED ABOUT WHAT I HAD TO DO TO GET OUT ALIVE, ALL FOR IT TO JUST PLONK ME BACK INTO THE HUBWORLD AND HAVE A SHIT DUMP OF A CONVERSATION. 

There was another moment, there was this young girl Aragami that you have to rescue and I think she was the girl you chat to in the hubworld a lot. Rescuing her was shit and boring and her mum was losing her mind over the grief and just didn’t mentally recover even when her daughter was returned. The game if shoving all of that at me without really setting up anything more than just telling me that stuff, so I really didn’t give a fuck about them cause they just kept talking at me. But, one moment that could’ve been impactful was when the mother decided to perform a suicide ceremony where she takes off her mask and jumps into an endless pit because she just couldn’t handle her fractured mind anymore. I got back from a mission and saw everyone lined up while she walked towards the pit and we just stood there watching. IF some better narrative steps had been taken to actually make me care, that could’ve been SO MUCH MORE IMPACTFUL. BUT because it is SOOOO DISCONNECTED from the missions I’m playing and she just says the same repetitive shit, I didn’t care! If I’m remembering correctly, the mission you play just before the mum jumps is a request from the girl. She asks you to prove you’re trustworthy by going through a level without being seen and without killing anyone. Which. Girl. I literally plucked you from your slave life and brought you home, and you’ve been chatting with me and watching me go off on dangerous missions and coming back, what the fuck do you mean I need to prove shit to you?? ANyway, you go through the level and have to climb to the top of some scaffolding and look over the blandest fucking plane of water sunset and find ‘inner peace.’ One weird thing I noticed was that some subtitles just appeared even though no one was talking. In the game, up till that point, every subtitle was used when you were listening in on what guards were saying. But this? No one was talking, and the language swapped between first and third person and it was a confusing mess. It was something like 'looking out over the view, I feel my soul at peace. But something unsettling rests in your soul. Time to go back' Like. Ugh. You do that shit ass mission and then get back to mum killing herself and then you go back to more missions. THIS GAME IS ASS!

There were so many things that COULD’VE been COOL, but they fell FLAT!!!!! There’s these weird necromancer priest enemies, who are connected to their Aragami soldiers mentally, and will freak out and alert others if you kill/knock out one of the soldiers connected to them. This could’ve been a cool mini boss of sorts, making it nearly impossible to brute force your way through their web of soldiers until you defeat them, and maybe defeating that priest would make every linked soldier drop dead too, making it a worthwhile challenge for certain areas of the map. But no, they’re just some dude that looks and fights a bit different, and they’re weak af too. I’d just hit them with a dart and then go slaughter everyone nearby quickly. It sucked. Another thing was this strange underground lab that really made me feel like it turned into Resident Evil, there were bones and shit in the floors and so many signs pointing to the fact that something bad had happened there, but it’s just set dressing! One of the only times they do something interesting with the set dressing and it’s barely relevant! AUGH

I have so much more to say but it’s becoming hard to recall everything. What I do remember very clearly was how glitchy and crap the game was. There were so many times where I wasn’t even trying to and I’d glitch through the level and get stuck in a wall or something and enemies wouldn’t behave properly and shit like that. Here's an example I recorded, this shit suckssss!!!!

In the first Aragami, I played through it 4 times before I found a glitch. And I only found that glitch because I was zooming through the level and went too fast, shadow leaping into an area that hadn’t fully loaded cause I covered so much distance, and didn’t have time to render in the door to block me so I fell through it and got stuck in the back room of the game. It was pretty cool tbh, and although I couldn’t find a way back into the level and needed to restart, it was kinda cool.

This game though? I glitched out so much that it was game breaking, and I needed to restart levels when I was ALMOST FINISHED cause something broke and I just couldn’t progress. Which brings me to loading times. Fu Ckin G LoADING TIMES. Most games you can be generous and give it anywhere near 30 seconds to load between levels and still be patient. I like to think I’m generally pretty patient, I play RE and kinda like the door loading screens for fucks sake. This game had loading times of over a minute. EVERY TIME. I don’t usually care about this sort of thing, but this was most of the experience. Every damn time I needed to be spat into a level it was just a black screen that said ‘Aragami 2’ and it took a little over 30 seconds just for the music to load in. I’m sittingß there with effectively a blank screen in silence for half a minute before some music comes in, and even then there’s still anywhere between another 30-60+ seconds to go before I can actually play. And even for when I needed to reload a level I was already in? I’d assume that because all the assets are already loaded it’d take less time cause it’s just a reset, right? WRONG! Full 60-90+ seconds to reload the whole thing again! I know a minute or two isn’t really that long, but man. It is fucking forever in this context. Makes all the unnecessary shit in botw to unlock a shrine, descend into the shrine, and start the shrine feel like speed running…

On a more positive note, Two Feathers are back again with the music and have provided some absolutely gorgeous songs for this game. I really liked the main theme overture, its equal parts nostalgic and hype with its rearrangement for this game. This reflects how the rest of the soundtrack, and game in general, is for the experience. Bigger, and more. While the soundtrack is an undeniable highlight for the game, I did find myself missing the more ambient and atmospheric tracks of the first game, as having a constant track playing got repetitive and annoying. It’s a real shame, cause songs like the Kakurega Village theme are very nice, but hearing the same song for it over and over cause I keep having to be in the hub world makes it annoying! That’s the thing with stealth games, though I’m fairly new to the genre, having big bombastic tracks all the time really deflates the stealthy atmosphere, and ambient tracks (and even silence!) can be utilised to get more out of those select few tracks that do have more going on. I found myself missing the quieter tone of the first game, there was something a little somber about it all, and it really helped me get into the headspace of the game and its story. Here, while the songs are good, they just didn’t help set the atmosphere for sneaking around and killing from the shadows. It really highlights the action elements that were introduced to the game, but it just feels off track for what I personally think the game should be. That’s not to say there aren’t quieter and more ambient tracks at all, just that in general the ratio leans more towards these more elaborate songs- which I feel makes the entire soundtrack feel larger and louder if you get what I mean. 

I’ve already talked for such a long time on this, and I feel like I have so much more to say, but it’s difficult to articulate everything the way I want… I wanted to enjoy this game so badly, but there were so many things that were gamebreaking and straight up not what I wanted from a sequel. It really makes me wonder what was going on during development for this game- despite my feelings for this game being rather sour, I did have moments where I genuinely enjoyed it, they were just few and far between. To my understanding, the first Aragami game was a 7 person team, and they got 3 more people on during development to make it a 10 person team. For Aragami 2, they doubled their team, having around 20 people working on this. Knowing that it was such a small team that made a game I loved so much and have played over and over is really fascinating to me, and it’s a shame they couldn’t capture me with their sequel despite the larger team. I wonder if there was a situation where it was too many cooks, or if someone new took the game in this new direction. I guess I’m just struggling to understand why they made such drastically different choices in ways that feel like they’re trying to separate themselves from their first game- it was a lovely game that was really creative and fun! Why distance yourself? Maybe there’s an element here that has gone right over my head, but I would like to know some behind the scenes info for why certain choices were made and what the development process was like. 

This game is somewhat of a morbid fascination for me, in the sense that it is kinda painful to think about all the lost and wasted potential, and even more painful to think about replaying. There’s not much online that I could find for this game, not even a fan wiki to help summarise the plot. I was really hoping there would be some kind of summary or explanation somewhere, because I really want to know what the hell was going on, and to see if a different method of telling, or a recap of the story might help me to better understand. But no, there’s nothing. At least nothing of substance I could find. 

I think I’ll leave it at that. It has been ages since I played, so my memory is a bit hazy- but I think it speaks volumes that I played both Aragami and Aragami 2 around April/May this year, and can remember more about Aragami than it’s sequel. I don’t think I’ll replay this game any time soon, but I’m not going to shut myself off from it. I did pay for the game after all, I want to get as much as I can out of it. Maybe it could be something fun to stream for a replay, and maybe a second look while knowing what to expect may help me piece together the plot a little easier. Who knows?

Aragami Overture - https://youtu.be/UhSuiYMAXkw 

Lone Mountain - https://youtu.be/QxZYGPea8eQ 

The Great Threat - https://youtu.be/3W2Jf9TFcBE 

~~~

Aragami

So, I have already reviewed this, and I didn’t play in the mindset to construct a real counter critique/look back while playing- it was more of a palette cleanser to play before and after it’s sequel. So this will be brief /cue 10 paragraphs

I love this game, that’s no secret. While I did praise it’s simple story- that’s what I’d like to talk about for this quick look back. I played my fifth playthrough of Aragami this year, and in all those playthroughs, I missed that there were lore scrolls hidden away in the menu that detail more of the story and history. Reading through these, I was able to reframe my understanding of the events and in game history leading up to the events I played through. They were nice little stories- it took me a couple of scrolls for it to really click and for me to understand what was going on, but when I did… Wow. I won’t say much about what they detail, as there’s a lot of names and places and things that happen that I can’t do justice in a recount; but I feel that they’ve really enhanced my understanding and experience of the game and it’s a shame they’re hidden away and so easily missed. It almost makes me want to replay 2 and see if there are any lore notes hidden in menus I didn’t see… almost. I might wait a while before tackling that again.

Also, I just wanna boast a little- I completed every level of Aragami on normal difficulty, every play style. I did a kill everyone route (which is best attempted after your first playthrough so you can take advantage of all your shadow techniques) and a kill no one and never detected playthrough. To challenge myself, I paired the kill no one and not detected and managed to complete all but 2 levels that way. It was really fun going through and feeling how much I had to change my way of thinking and strategizing depending on what style of gameplay I wanted to tackle, this game both introduced me to and made me really enjoy these kinds of stealth/sneaking games. Hell yeah!

~~~

Another Eden

I previously spoke about this game, and that the whole reason I started playing was to see the Chrono Cross event- and I didn’t even talk about it lmao. I’m going to talk about it a little, and then this is effectively a pt2 because I played the pt2 of the main story.

So, Chrono Cross event. I’ve almost 100%ed everything there is to do with the event, just some branching dialogue paths and a Starky fight to do (and Starky is so OP it’s not funny) so I haven’t attempted to brute force my way through any more of it until I can level up more of my faves. Overall, this was a really nice little cross(ha)over event, it had a good amount of story to play through with different routes to take, and the world of Another Eden ties into it so believably that it was a great fit to cross over with. I only really cared about Kid and Serge, so I did their routes (good and neutral) as thoroughly as possible. In classic Kato fashion, I didn’t exactly vibe with the whole story, but it was fun while it lasted and now I get to keep Kid and Serge in my party permanently. I’ve maxed them both out as well, radical dreamer style >:) Now, they stay in my main party group of faves because they are really strong, and due to all my grinding and the way the event works, they both have heaps of light points so they’re awesome when I grind through dungeons. That’s all I really care to say about the event, it’s nothing too deep and I finished my grinding sessions on it closer to the start of the year, so it’s a little hazy and I don’t want to recall things incorrectly.

Now, onto the next main story chunk for AE. Full disclosure, while I enjoyed the most of the main campaign for part one, I found it too closely mirroring jrpg tropes (and in particular feeling overly familiar to ct without coming close to scratching the itch) so I wasn’t fully engaged the entire time. I also thought the ending to that section was convoluted bogus, like just eye-rollingly so. I understand they did that to keep adding campaigns, however ESPECIALLY after playing this section… yeah I still think it's bogus lol. This part 2 of the main story focuses on the ogre wars, and it went into the backstory of my favourite character. Turns out, he’s got a pretty tragic backstory! Trust me to latch onto that before it was even revealed lmao. (The fave in question is Dunarith btw, I like most those beast dudes, and they’re all decent fighters)

Cause this game also has timey-wimey bullshit paired with dimensional fuckery, that’s what leads most of the plot for this section. The ogres that fought themselves to extinction are somehow back, they kidnap the Beast King’s sister, and our main party resolves to put aside their differences and join the beasts to recover the Beast Princess. It was nice to see more of the beast culture (trust me to love the boring world building shit) and it was nice to see even more expansions on the map with more places and sidequests to visit. Snake Bone Island was without a doubt the highlight for me. A secluded little island (bet you’ll never guess what it’s built on!) with a bunch of really nice scenery and great music that has that palpable Mitsuda insp. My favourite part was definitely all of the quests that related to Dunarith, as he had so much more going on in his backstory than I initially thought. I was genuinely invested, and looked forward to playing during quiet moments at work and fitting in a quick half hour or so before bed. I don’t know if I should spoil what goes on in his quests, in case anyone reading would like to play and experience for themselves first, so I won’t say anything. One thing though, during the climax of the story mission regarding Dunarith, I was a bit :/// at how quickly the ‘issue’ was ‘resolved,’ it was really showing the lite in jrpg-lite to just whip out the tragedy and not let it sink in or breathe because the plot needs to be resolved by the end of the mission so the subsequent ones can follow through. If you can figure out this attempt at crypticness; it felt like it was trying to set up an event similar to ct’s most memorable moment, but without any of the time left for it to feel real, so the impact was lost. I’m just going to pretend in my mind that the impact was there, because honestly that’s my only main gripe with it, and I recognise that it’s very much an issue born from the fact that this is a lite game designed for mobile/ios. For the most part, it really felt like the developers of this game really refined things (at least narratively) from the first part, and crafted a plot that I was consistently more interested in! That in and of itself is a feat, as this has just turned into a very casual and almost idle game that I leave to auto play sidequests with minimal input from myself so I can grind and unlock the quests I’m actually interested in. To have a main story mission that was so consistent and interesting to follow, at least for myself, has me appreciating this game more than I did for prior chunks.

However, there is one thing I want to bring up that’s really left a sour taste on all that goodness. Right now, I’m soft locked out of progressing in not one but two quests I REALLY want to see through. The first is the main quest, I believe it’s the part that will wrap up/link to/start part 3 of the main story- so to be soft locked fucking sucks! There was never any indication that you’d need to upgrade certain party members via tomes (magic bs thingies you have to grind for that are rng drops in the End of Time rip off) and I had been grinding idly for MONTHS trying to get a tome for one character that I never use anymore cause she’s annoying and is not powerful enough to compare with my mains. I just couldn’t progress the story until a character I’ve outgrown was levelled up, and it wasn’t even clear to me how to get the tome in the first place. And let me tell you, the wiki’s are confusing and the reddit help threads aren’t all that helpful either lol. And all that grinding… to only get through like 3 chapters and find out I have to grind more for another character who is even more annoying that I dropped near the start of the game. Like!? This is a gatcha game, I’ve got like 50+ party members to choose from, and I have like 10 that are really powerful that I swap out, with my main 6 staying very consistent cause they’re so strong. Why do I give a fuck about some old one that I didn’t even like, and why do I have to grind forever while the game consistently refuses to give me the one tome I need. I have everything else I need to upgrade the shit robot girl. JUST NOT HER TOME. Sighhhhhhhhhhhh

I’m currently trying to blast through some major side missions/other crossover type thingies (?) because apparently you get a better chance for the tome through that. Fingers crossed, cause idgaf about the really long side mission I’m currently on lmao. 

That brings me to the second thing I’m soft locked out of currently- which is this one wild side mission that I at first didn’t care about, but then came to get fairly invested. I didn’t care at first because it was about a bunch of religious missionaries from a church who vary in mild to moderate levels of being annoying, and I mainly picked up the quest because it was a great way to get heaps of the in-game currency I was trying to save up. As I played, there was a guy who fell from the sky, landed with amnesia, and then through some events you find that there’s a cultish group behind the straying church morals, and they try to get rid of the religious missionary figures that I mentioned earlier. In a panic, the guy who fell from the sky somehow uses crazy magical powers through his instinct/muscle memory, and it ends up rewinding time. He uses this to his advantage to save them, and then some stuff happened that I kinda forgot and they go to ‘heaven’ for a bit where they meet the angels who I’m pretty sure wrote the religious texts the missionaries based their faith on. Like, it was pretty cool, I'm a bit of a sucker for fantasy religion vs cult stuff. And I can’t remember most of it because I played it mid last year and got soft locked out right as it was getting to new heights of interesting because I haven’t progressed far enough in the main game. The main game that I can’t progress cause I haven’t upgraded a character I don’t give two shits about. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Conyum - https://youtu.be/6O3FefCeQRk?t=642 

I was going to just play to max out Kid and Serge (and a few other faves like Dunarith) to see their stories to the end and hopefully have a bit of idle fun before putting it down for good, but I found myself pleasantly surprised and drawn in by a few stand out moments, and I look forward to seeing if there’s anything more like that. I at least want to see the end of that religious mission, but what sucks is that it’s been so long and I’ve done so many other quests and missions that I’m hazy and forgetting so much of it, and it’s REALLY hard to find lore recaps for this game lol. Sucks. I hope I can at least replay the mission when I’ve finished it, cause I want to pick up on the details now that I know it’s worth slogging through the stuff I didn’t care about in the beginning.

Also, the music and art is consistently really nice, so yee haw. The game may not be perfectly aligned to all my tastes and preferences, and I often find myself uninterested or eye rolling at some classic Kato choices for story, but the sheer amount of content put into this mobile game is really something! I haven’t paid a cent and there’s been a good couple hours of genuinely fun and enjoyable moments for me- well worth it! 

Serpent’s Neck Igoma - https://youtu.be/6O3FefCeQRk?t=1056 

Palace of the Sea Goddess - https://youtu.be/6O3FefCeQRk?t=3385 

~~~

Radical Dreamers HD

Wow! The first Chrono game to make the list since I started doing these!!

In all honesty, I want to play through the chrono games with these lists in mind and make an attempt of actually articulating what I love (and don’t love) about them in a more in depth manner, similar to my resi branches.

I also only played one full go of RD when it came to switch, so I feel I can’t fully talk about it anyway. So, this will be a shallow gush instead :P

So! Chrono Cross HD with the first official Eng translation of Radical Dreamers! That was unexpected and very surprising! I never thought we’d be getting new Chrono content after all these years, especially not an official crossover in Another Eden (that had great voice acting for Serge and Kid btw!) and a HD game! I’m full autism for Chrono Trigger, then Radical Dreamers (and I guess Cross… it makes me a bit cranky but now that there’s this shiny new HD release I can dust off my switch and play with the most neutral-to-positive stance I can manage!) So let me tell you, it was soooooo nice to play RD in my bed! It was winter and I had just moved house a month or two prior and even though uni was really hectic, I played over 2-3 nights to complete the first playthrough. It was so cosy to play, all wrapped up in bed with a hot chocolate and the nostalgia I had for this game being awakened. 

There’s a specific vibe to RD that I really enjoy, it’s just kind of eerie and unsettling, but so full of charm and wit and I fucking adore it. Although there are honestly a lot of plot points and references and what have you that allude to implications that absolutely butcher ct, it is a little easier for me to overlook them in favour of enjoying what this game has to offer. (I find it much harder to overlook these kinds of narrative choices in CC, because, well… reasons. I’ll go in depth another time) I love the trio dynamic, Kid is a sassy bogan, Serge is such a loveable denim dumbass and quintessential Boy™, and Magil is the reluctant adult supervision who barely supervises. Joking aside, I genuinely do enjoy the way the trio bounce off each other, and it’s great to have it framed through Serge’s pov. It makes me so sad that due to the experimental nature of this game, and how short it is, that Kato tried to distance himself and overcorrect things that weren’t necessarily issues and went overboard with CC. There is a certain magic here that captivated me, and despite it definitely not being the sequel I wanted, it’s better than the sequel we ‘got’ (in my opinion) and I’d highly recommend people interested by either CT or CC give this a fair go. And go more in depth and try to complete the multiple endings too, I haven’t finished all of them but there are some classic things that happen and gahhh this game is really fun in spite of and because of it’s weirdness and divergence from CT.

Day of Summer - https://youtu.be/iIHDQ0FONik 

Gale - https://youtu.be/G7687ikwhao 

Final Confrontation - https://youtu.be/Eo1r_BapDP8

~~~

Solitaire

I just have so many hours on this that it deserves a special mention. Shout out to Solitaire!

No music recs, cause there isn’t a soundtrack… so……. Go listen to your favourite Jazzy album! And if you don’t have one, listen to this or this >:)

~~~

Tetris 3DS

What is there to say? It’s tetris, but on the 3DS. I think the one I play is something weird like Tetris Ultimate 3D something, but my DS is in my room and I’m not getting up from my computer to go check lol. 

Controls are refined, it’s nice to be able to slam down the tetrominoes quickly, and holding one in reserves is fun and changes the way you strategise. I don’t really strategise tho, I just play this the way I play solitaire. Brain off, I’m tryna relaxxxxx

I bet you could hum the tetris theme from memory, so go ahead and sing that to yourself as my music rec. Totally not cause I play the game muted while I’m watching youtube or something. Of course not.

~~~

Star Realms (Mobile)

I played the mobile version of this quite a bit this year, mainly when my dad or sibling are in town. We usually play for a few days online after they’ve gone back home too, but I got busy with uni so I didn’t play much on my own. 

There are campaigns to learn and master the various decks, so it’s interesting trying out the decks I don’t have to see what they’re all about. I still have no idea how to use the deck my dad likes to play with, but my favourite deck is Colony Wars, and I have a physical copy of it and no one to play with :’’’’(

No music rec for this either cause I play muted… so uhhhhh… listen to the nearest sci-fi sound to you!

~~~

Bug Fables

Ahh Bug Fables. I’ve heard about this game and had it very far in my periphery for years- it’s constantly touted as The Game To Play if you’re a Paper Mario fan who yearns for the style of the earlier entries. And well, I saw it on sale on my PS4 and said fuck it. Why not?

Now, I wanna say upfront- I’m a huge fan of the Paper Mario series (despite not having played all the entries…) and I miss playing PM64, so to constantly hear this game as ‘oh yeah it’s got all the good thing of 64/ttyd and then does it better!’ made it have a lot to live up to for me. Now, I did try to go into this game as neutrally as possible, but due to hearing years of this game being built up that way, I did feel a bit disappointed that it didn’t really scratch that PM itch. Overall this was a lovely game and I enjoyed myself and will definitely replay in the future, but I found the lines between inspiration and imitation being blurred a little too frequently for my liking, and there was a certain (subjective) lack of polish that ultimately made me resent the fact that it is so closely tied to the PM games. 

The visuals are nice, the animations are good- but I don’t really care about bugs so there wasn’t really anything that charmed me the same way seeing Mario characters in the 2D paper style did. The music is generally pretty good, with a few stand out tracks I’ll be linking, but there’s a lot of tracks that sounded annoying and.. Kinda bad.. At least to me. I don’t wanna shit on the composer, because in general this is a really high quality soundtrack and I really do like a lot of the songs! But when the first two or three songs I heard in the game were annoying or sounded discordant in a bad way, I was really hesitant to push through. That, paired with little nitpicky things and the admittedly unfair comparison to PM64 had me feeling glad that I didn’t pay full price. The look and soundtrack are also HEAVILY reminiscent of the 64 style and sound, and there were some things that I felt could’ve been changed to better suit the direction they were going to make this an even more unique experience that is undeniably ‘Bug Fables.’ Little things like the xp symbol being pretty much the same as the xp in 64, but there’s a leaf in it instead of a star… Things like that, things that felt too heavily lifted from the game it’s inspired by but choosing to leave it at an imitation because hey, it worked for them!

This game was a chance to take inspiration, learn from, refine upon and build something new from the things we learn with the PM franchise. My biggest gripe with this game is that, while they do have some improvements made from systems they pinched from those games- like the side quest board allowing you to just take every open quest and attack them at your leisure instead of ttyd’s way of only letting you do one at a time -I feel a bit burned by the fact that it relies on PM so much. I really wonder if this game would be half as fun to people who have never played a PM game, and if they’d understand the mechanics and gameplay and such for this game on its own. I often found myself thinking 'is this really the best decision for this game, or are they banking on my nostalgia for a different game to make me like this game more?' I also didn’t know how small the studio was that made this game, so while I recognise that there are limits and that a more indie studio can’t compare to the same level of polish and character as a AAA like Nintendo; I do wanna end my feeling of gripes on something like… Yeah, you made a great game! But! Did you really do all you could to cultivate the unique feeling you wanted for your game, or were you relying on my knowledge and experience of PM to charm me into enjoying this?

I know that’s kind of mean and a very harsh critique, but I wanted to get that out of the way so I could gush about what I genuinely enjoyed. Cause this game is great, I just feel it wasn’t the next step for me as a fan of PM, and that it has linked itself too closely with it.

So, onto the nicer stuff. This game was really fun! I enjoyed that fact that the main party is a trio, and it just stays as that trio for the whole game. It made it so tight in character development and really allowed me to get to know these characters and enjoy their dynamic. I loved hearing their thoughts on each area, I loved the moments that revolved around one of the characters and showed how the other two supported them through those points in the story. I also liked seeing the way they interacted with the NPCs you see frequently, the world does have a charm all of it’s own (just not one that I resonated with/felt too deeply)

The party consists of Kabbu, the green one, Vi, the yellow one, and Lief, the blue one. Ok, there is more to them than just their colours- Kabbu is a classic kind hearted and honourable type, Vi is hot headed and has that ego that rebellious young kids/tweens have, and Lief is a little more reserved, but witty and cheeky in his own way. The point of the game is to journey across the land and gather artifacts for Queen Elizant to reveal the Everlasting Sapling. There are a lot of different bug kingdoms, and a nice amount of side quests to help flesh out said kingdoms. The more you play, the more you gain an understanding of the politics between the kingdoms, and to what lengths various leaders will go to for the sapling. Lots of stuff happens, I don’t want to go in depth here because I think the way the game reveals certain plot points was generally paced well, and if you haven’t played this game for yourself, I’d recommend going in as blind as you can. If you’re hesitant, let me just say, that even though I was battling my own snooty bias towards PM, I really loved getting to know all 3 characters as they all have interesting backstories that intertwine with the overall narrative, and the more you dig around and try to find out about the world, the stranger/more fascinating some things seem.

I can totally understand why this game has such high ratings, it is a great game and not too difficult, so I do feel that even if you’re not as familiar with this style of game, you’re sure to get something out of it and look back on it fondly. I know I’ll be having fun thinking about certain quests and plot points, and I’ve periodically come back just to play the card game tournaments because they’re simple and fun once you wrap your head around them!

I would just say… I think it was done dirty by comparing/imitating so closely to PM, and that the strong connection to it did deflate some of the experience for me. Maybe thats a personal thing, due to my love for PM and huge nostalgia for PM64 in particular, but that’s something I’d like other potential players to keep in mind. 

It’s a great game, and cause I was pretty harsh, I’m adding twice the song recs >:)

The One Left Behind (Leif's Theme) - https://youtu.be/BtrNUi4b7o0 

His Friends Call Him Spuder (Don't Call Him Spuder) - https://youtu.be/Ivv-F-q81tA 

Oh No! WASPS!! - https://youtu.be/vnguaxxXUbc 

Kut It Up! - https://youtu.be/xoTFge7b1v0 

The Sacred Hills - https://youtu.be/b_OSyr3IwAU 

Termite Capitol - https://youtu.be/oILKKd80Hyg 

~~~

Hitman Trilogy PS4 (2016-2022)

Zayum, I love dress up games!

Haha, for real, this was an unexpected favourite of the year for me. I have had so much fun the past month and a half bingeing this trilogy, and you’d think it being so recent would make it easier to talk about, right? Here’s hoping…

I had never really heard about Hitman until my friend told me about it, saying that she wanted to watch me play and that she thought I’d really enjoy it. She was right, I’ve had a blast. As I understand, this is a soft reboot for the series, but still has some lore/plot points that build off previous entries in the series. As someone who was freshly dropped into the world of Hitman through this trilogy, I was only mildly confused in the beginning, but once I started playing the campaign missions, it was relatively self contained and easy to follow along. Any info from previous entries seems to just be nods and references to things I can’t pick up on, which didn’t affect my ability to enjoy what was on offer. 

And man, there’s so much here. There’s an overarching plot across the three game’s campaigns, and I was so pleasantly surprised that not only did the main plot have rippling effects across all the missions- but things like NPC gossip too! It was fun to sneak around and gather intel or complete the story missions that help to set up opportunities to assassinate your target; I often found myself enjoying the chance to be a nosey cunt and eavesdrop on conversations and follow certain NPCs as they went about their business. The attention to detail really helped to make this world feel large and lived in, and some of the best levels have some really interesting NPC tangents that have absolutely nothing to do with the hit, but are just as memorable- if not more. Things like this guy desperately trying to assemble a desk chair at the Swedish Embassy, https://youtu.be/NayAsm80RHM some nosey party guests snooping around and conspiring as to how the occupants are able to afford all their cool stuff, and a lady with a small cupcake business who is hiding murderous tendencies https://youtu.be/0mqkRo8AKz8 - just to name a few!

In general, the main plot and methods of killing in each level are good fun, and it was interesting to follow along and get to the bottom of everything in each game. I will say, I think it’s better to look at this as a trilogy (and this was the way I was playing) as some progressions in the ‘self contained’ game chunk may feel rushed or unexpected if you try to look at it on it’s own. There were even some points when playing that I found some plot points happened or developed very quickly, and I felt a bit lost because they weren’t given enough build up or time in my opinion. A large part of what lost my ability to hold onto the plot and comprehend it was the discrepancy in the cutscenes across all 3 games. I looked into it briefly, cause halfway through 2 I thought ‘surely it can’t be this bad without reason,’ and sure enough, there was a reason! Hitman 1 was produced with Square Enix’s support, but due to the original release dropping campaign maps once every few months, it really impacted player’s ability to enjoy it to the fullest. Square pulled out and IOI [who own’s the Hitman IP] now had to make Hitman 2 with reduced staff and budget, so the nice cinematic cutscenes from 1 were now stills with slight motion graphics animation. Like… Netflix screensaver animation. I understand that lack of budget and manpower lead to this choice, but it made it incredibly difficult to feel invested or even understand what was going on half the time with the still images - ESPECIALLY when there were more than 2 people talking. There was just no easy way to set that up with the limitation they imposed on themselves for the cutscenes, which is a shame because a lot of important developments happen in them. IOI did not drip feed the campaign for 2, and when 3 came around they brought back actual cutscenes, just using the in game engine to do so. I really wish that they just used the in game engine for all of the cutscenes, because they are very short but often complex and dramatic so it’s really important to see the acting and body language they want to give the characters. Obviously they wouldn’t have had the foresight to know Square would drop them and they’d have to continue making a AAA game as an independent studio/look for other publishers, but it just is such a shame that the plot of 2 was quite important but ultimately feels like a black hole to me because I struggled to understand the cutscenes. As I understand, there were also issues when 3 launched that made it difficult to link the levels for 1&2 into 3, where they intended for 3 to be the main hub to access the entire trilogy. Shit move, and I won’t really talk about it cause I wasn’t there to experience it, but I suggest looking into it more if you’re so inclined because it is sadly interesting to see what a mess it was. What I did experience from this mess was that, when the trilogy pack was on sale on the PS4,  I decided to buy it and was so filled with dread to only see Hitman 3 downloading, thinking I clicked the wrong thing or got scammed (cause there are like a bajillion hitman expansions/access passes in the store, it’s so confusing!) BUT LUCKILY Hitman 1&2 are treated like access passes and in the game. 

(Also there was no where nice to squeeze this in BUT even in the big budget cutscenes from 1, there were discrepancies in audio that I noticed. Maybe this is just because I'm a recently graduated film bro™ so I'm primed to keep an ear out, but just listen to the last cutscene in Hitman 1. The two voice actors were recorded in different studios and the quality gap is noticeable! Dianna sounds nice and crisp as always, but the constant sounds like he recorded in a make shift booth or was in his wardrobe and the mixers forgot to do dynamics processing!)

Another point of contention, and one that almost made me annoyed enough to not have a good time, is the fact that it requires me to be online. For anything to count, that is. There are offline options for main campaigns, but so much of the peripheral content to play has online as mandatory to even load it - and if you play through a main mission offline, any skills/missions/achievements ect you unlocked DO NOT COUNT and are not saved. Meaning that you effectively played for nothing. WHAT THE HELL. This is a single player game, I am alone on my couch playing by myself, and I still need to be consistently online in order to actually play. It is really fun seeing the end screen after a mission where you are greeted with a whole screen full of achievements and story missions to aim for, and when you’re offline you don’t get that because your progress didn’t count. THIS is one of the EXACT things that’s made me feel incredibly disillusioned and pretty much loathe the current gaming landscape. Sure, I’ve had my fun with some modern titles, and I really have been enjoying my PS4 these past couple of years, but come onnnnnnnnnn. Do you remember when you’d get a game, and just put it in? And you could start playing? Stick that cartridge in the console and you’ve got an experience waiting for you? Even moving to bigger games, the most you’re waiting before you can play is just for creating save data so you can record your progress. Modern games requiring you to install a bunch of shit and wait around for sometimes hours to be able to open it and actually start playing, only to then find that the servers are having a tantrum and don’t want to host your game… Makes me regret being a gamer in all honesty. And it feels like the biggest slap to the face when I encounter this kind of thing in a SINGLE PLAYER GAME with MINIMAL TO NO ONLINE ELEMENTS. If I didn’t have such a great time while playing the Hitman trilogy, this would’ve been a massive deal breaker to me. And I only seemed to drop from servers when I’d left the game paused for too long, so the servers are more stable than they seemed to be at launch. That makes me glad that I generally play behind the curve lmao.

Anyway, those big gripes aside, the actual gameplay of Hitman was fun enough that I was able to put aside what would otherwise be deal breakers for me. The stealth and spy aspects of this game were incredible, and felt rewarding and open enough that it truly felt at times that I could do anything. It wasn’t often that I felt lost or unsure of what to do, because even when I was lost, I could usually just wander around the level and eavesdrop until I heard something useful (or entertaining) or saw a new method of getting to where I wanted to go. It felt like a sandbox, a miniature open world for me to do whatever I wanted to; as long as I completed my mission. As I’ve only really played one other stealth game, and was largely unfamiliar with the style of gameplay, I played through the whole game on the casual mode- however now that I am more than familiar with how the game plays and starting to challenge my understanding of the mechanics with the escalation contracts, I look forward to the increased difficulty of professional and master mode.

Some of these worlds felt so elaborate and alive, and it scratches a particular kind of itch to go through the entire level and find new shortcuts and paths to places as I get intimate with the area. Levels like Sapienza, Whittlehorn Creek, Isle of Sgail and Dartmoor were personal favourites, though I enjoyed the majority of maps. Wandering around the city as various types of people, seeing where I could fit in and go unnoticed and seeing current events based on previous hits I did was fun as fuck. The Dartmoor level, which I suspect is a fan favourite, was a great shake up on the formula as it provides an opportunity for you to disguise yourself as a PI and investigate a murder mystery- interviewing suspects, inspecting crime scenes and suspects’ private rooms, and framing who you want as the culprit was super fun! So much of this game was just fun! As serious as some missions are, with eerie tones that really add an unsettling and sometimes downright disturbing implication, there are almost always silly things to do as well for when you just want to have some fun! Agent 47 didn't really talk much in the first game, but in the second and third he talks a lot more and it was interesting seeing just how seriously he takes his job… sometimes getting way too into it. Like, dancing in the flamingo mascot costume, stealing the clothes off the lead model and getting your makeup done so you can walk the runway, and giving some of the funniest and strangest dialogue when he is undercover as a real estate agent or giving a tour of a winery. The possibilities really feel endless, and I'm constantly impressed with the way the developers managed to balance everything for various gameplay styles.

There were, however, some maps that weren’t as fun for me- mainly military heavy ones. I know that a great deal of what I’ve said I enjoyed about this game is the fact that you can sneak around and snoop, but the sneaking and snooping in military levels (and ones that, while not explicitly military, feel like it with the sheer amount of security guards and their ranks) straight up sucks! When I was playing, I was often replaying the same level over and over to see all the main story missions, and sometimes just wander around the levels and try to see everything I could. When I first got to a military level, I found myself so bored by it that I did not replay it, and I stopped replaying levels over and over and just played once through to see the story to the end. I have completed the trilogy, but I feel much closer to 1 at this stage cause I am most familiar with those levels. It’s a shame the military levels affected me in that way, but I’m going to hope that based on my experience enjoying the early levels in 1 the more I played them, that I’ll have just as much fun getting to know the other levels while I keep playing over new years. 

Another nitpick I think is worth mentioning, is that sometimes the game glitched out and made certain story missions unplayable for me, which was a shame. There were multiple times where things just wouldn’t register, or the NPCs would break and just stand still somewhere, or loop in their actions and not give me an opportunity to do what the game wanted me to do. It really sucked having to try reload saves or even having to restart levels because of glitches like that, but due to the nature of this game having multiple routes to achieve your goals, it wasn’t so bad. Oh and while I'm nitpicking - while it was great to be able to adjust the UI so that I could actually see the button prompts in game, I couldn't adjust the font size for the mission briefings while I was planning the missions. You'd think I could read the text on the tv while my couch isn't even that far away from it, but I constantly had to sit up and scootch to the edge of my seat to read, and even then the text was so small and had barely any spacing between words that I struggled to read anyway. Makes it apparent that it was made with PC in mind first, as that wouldn't be such an issue when the screen is centimetres away from your face, but zayum I came here to play dress ups and kill people, not strain my eyes :(

Another thing I haven't even touched on yet is the music! While there's plenty of diegetic music, the soundtrack itself is pretty great. The drawn out sounds of the strings really builds up that slinky mood, and are quite iconic sounding. A lot of the classical sounds feels like an homage to classic spy movies too, and that's hard to miss when there's a few heavy handed visual allusions drawn as well haha. One thing I really love in the soundtrack is the choir, the addition of vocals like that makes it sound almost religious at times, which is very dramatic, especially paired with the strings! It's quite a beautiful soundtrack, and it feels very cohesive across the trilogy without it taking attention away from the gameplay- which is quite impressive to me that it was pulled off this way! A stealth game by design requires you to focus more on your mission, and a poor or even mediocre choice in music can ruin the mood and experience, so to have such a classical and dramatic soundtrack NOT feel intrusive to my gameplay was awesome.

I’m finding it really difficult to articulate much more about this trilogy, because I’m still in the high of hyperfixation that’s bringing a lot of subjectivity to this look back (more than I aim for :P) I enjoyed the plot being connected and overarching even though it wasn't that deep, and there were some absolutely stand out levels that were so interesting in both a gameplay and worldbuilding manner that I enjoyed myself immensely. I don’t think I can really expand much more on the plot or gameplay as everything is a jumbled mess in my brain while I’m riding this high- so perhaps after I’ve put this down and come back in a year or two, I can write something better after having some space and this to compare my future thoughts to. 

If you’re into stealth games, being a nosey cunt, or being bald- I highly recommend checking this trilogy out. A great draw to this is that, even if you simply watch a handful of different people playing, you’re sure to have a different experience every time due to the sheer amount of possibilities there are! I had a great time, and if you choose to look into this game more or play yourself, I hope you have a great time too. I think I just need to wait a while and have some distance from this game before I can say anything more in depth- as if this isn’t already paragraphs long :P

Showstopper https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBw4Kh30pOc&t=178s 

Approaching Storm https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBw4Kh30pOc&t=6445s 

Severing Strings https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBw4Kh30pOc&t=10301s 

Invitation to Dance https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBw4Kh30pOc&t=10749s 

[coles-scythe]

I'm in one of those moods where I wanna look at 2D because he gives me so much serotonin, but I cannot come up with the words to properly describe just how much I hate the Phase 7 models from Cracker Island, Silent Running, the promo stuff, and all the TikTok stuff. He (and everyone else) looks like plastic, feel incredibly lifeless, and it's just awful. They feel like cheap, low quality, and quickly made V-Tuber models. The animation itself in the Cracker Island and Silent Running videos are the only redeeming quality of them to me.

I know everyone clowned on the models for the mocap interviews and promos and stuff from Phase 4. They were definitely even lower budget than the Phase 7 models, but at least they were CHARMING and FUNNY. They are genuinely my fav 3D models. I loved it when they played into the more unnatural and surreal feeling the mocaps had through 2D in the Sleeping Powder video. And, while not 2D related, the eye tracking for Murdoc being so awful has lead to some of my most favorite screencaps from that era of the band. Low quality but made with love is automatically high tier for me.

There's also the Phase 1, 2, and 3 models of 2D, but idrc abt them. The low-poly model used for long distance shots in 19-2000 is cute. The model for the BRIT-Awards is top-tier but I don't have much to say abt it. The model in the MTV Awards performance is fine and I like that they gave him a phone to fiddle with while he's waiting for his turn to sing. And all the hyper-realistic models in Phase 3 are objectively amazing in terms of detail and the skill needed to make and animate those things, but they are horrifying to look at because this is a cartoon character NOT meant to exist in a realistic way.

[strawberry-metal]

Animasa was my first and only exposure to MMD for years, so I've got to stick with them. Yes it's low poly and doesn't look as detailed and professional as the new stuff, but it's so endearing? Like an old video game, you can't not love it and if you don't, yes you do.

Aww~ I agree! Something about Animasa is just so special, especially because it's the very first models you get when you start MMD! Sure they may not have alot of bones, expressions, and have lightbulb heads, but I think they're very charming and cute in their own way! I especially LOVE the edits people made when MMD was newer and there was animasa model edits everywhere, I remember wanting the Sailor Uniform models so bad lol

[f1shart]

someone else in tags said it but i also dont like the style of cc hair ESPECIALLY 4t2.. people say clay hair fits best in ts2 but i'm like 😐😐 (STILL LOVE PEOPLE'S SCREENSHOTS W THEM THOUGH HAHA)

^ and i find the pooklet style hairs to be too soft for my liking.... true maxis match all the way

💔 i dont like clean ui for ts2 💔 i need my maxis frutiger aero ui or i will die (plus it's just so much more charming. clean ui reminds me of ts4 especially with the sims 4 cursor addon... get her AWAY FROM ME)

the environments in ts4 are ugly asf bro. idk how unpopular this is but people are always like "the best sims game would have <actually good stuff from previous games> and ts4's graphics 😍😍" MAYBE MY BIAS IS SHOWING BUT THE SIMS 4 IS UGLY LMAO HAVE YOU SEEN THOSE LOW POLY PIGEONS?? i think ts3's environments, even without cc, are much prettier and more immersive

what are your sims unpopular opinions? for any of the games!

[bokuroskitten]

𝔓𝔯𝔬𝔪𝔬𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫

〈Kuroo never seem to get the promotion, unless he has the help of his good luck charm(s)

❉Genre: NSFW 18+ (minors dni) ❉warning(s): tw: blood, Poly relationships (Bokuroo x Reader), DDLG dynamics (Papa and Daddy titles used), fingering (female receiving), oral (male receiving), slight exhibitionism.  ❉Character(s): Timeskip! Bokuto Koutarou x Kuroo Tetsurō x Fem!Reader

❉

Fucking hell.” Bokuto murmured to himself from the back seat of the sleek sports car he sat in. The white button up he had decided to wear to the job today was sprinkled with droplets of blood. It had been a messier shift than usual, and now his shirt had paid the price.

His thumb brushed over his collar bone, grumbling out an annoyed “fuck” when blood was smeared along the pad of his finger. Akaashi looked to Bokuto through the review mirror, before he turned into the private driveway with ease. “You’re usually never this messy, Bokuto-San.” “Yea well, that guy was an asshole.” The grey haired male barked out, knowing very well it wasn’t Akaashi’s fault but sometimes unable to hold back his frustrations. He hated coming home like this, despite Kuroo working along side him most of the time. He just didn’t like when YOU had to see it, the violence or the dark stuff that came with the jobs him and Kuroo had to do. Even though you were all aware and stayed with them regardless, he still didn’t like bringing it home. “Thanks for the ride Akaashi. See you tomorrow.” Bokuto spoke as he quickly opened the door. Akaashi nodded to his leader, rolling down the window to speak. “Did you need me to call someone to come pick up that suit? They’ll get all the blood out.” Bokuto waved a yes, knowing Akaashi knew him well enough for his answer without having to actually say it. The male sighed as he easily clicked open the front door. He expected to be welcomed home by at least one of his partners, but it only made his brows furrow with more irritation to be met with silence. “Hello?” He called to the open hallway, finally hearing the muffled voice of Kuroo. “One moment please— Bo, in the office love.” Bokuto was rolling up the sleeves of his dirtied shirt as he headed for the office. “Are you on the phone or something Ro? Where’s Birdy? I thought she’d be home. Today was such a shit sh—“ He paused when he finally walked into the office, his eyes meeting those of Kuroo’s which were currently lit up with devilish mischief. He was indeed on the phone, having it pressed up against his ear with shoulders as his palms...

One was pinning your arms against your back, while the other was buried between your trembling thighs. You were stuck over Kuroo’s lap, ass up and bruised and body naked. You looked to Bokuto and whimpered softly into the tie that had been stuffed between your lips, the one he assumed belonged to Kuroo. “Ah~ this is why y’all couldn’t respond.” Bokuto murmured, lowering his voice as Kuroo continued on with his business call, fingers still causing a mess between your legs. Bokuto had to chuckle, approaching slowly as to not make a sound. He took hold of your chin, slowly rose your face so you could look him in the eye. They were wide and filled with tears, another whimper muffled through fabric making Bokuto’s grin grow even bigger. He bent at the knees, thumb quick to scoop up the tear that slipped from your eye. “You look so pretty like this Birdy...~” Bokuto spoke in a whisper, his eyes darting up to Kuroo only to see that his voice didn’t disturb the call. “Daddy’s really been giving it you huh?” You nodded desperately, wanting to reach for him but only having Kuroo’s large palm grip your wrists tighter, his fingers only leaving your core to give your rear a quick swat before going back to work. Your eyes widened as your body jolted, facing lulling into Bokuto’s warm and inviting palm. Bokuto chuckled again, this time slowly pulling the tie from between your swollen lips. You gasped softly when it was removed, chest heaving as you caught your breath, whined softly at Bokuto. “P-Papa~” you pleaded, only to be shushed by Bokuto who ran his thumb over your bottom lip, knowing you’d happily suck it between your petals. “Only a little longer Buba, you’re Daddy’s good luck charm remember?” Bokuto encouraged, pressing kisses along your dampened face. It was more that Kuroo just loved teasing you while he was on business, the threat of someone hearing your pretty cries turning both you and him on. But things did seem to work in his favour whenever he had you begging and whimpering for him while on a business call. So it became a regular thing. Kuroo let out a hearty laugh into the phone, his eyes peering down at Bokuto and sending a wink his way, all the while two of his fingers pressed into your sweet spot. You bit down gently on Bokuto’s thumb, an attempt to stay quiet as possible and failing as you curled your toes in sweet delight. Bokuto’s hissed softly, biting his own lip as his own excitement seems to build within his pants. Considering his suit was already a mess from earlier, he thought a little more fun wouldn’t hurt. “Let’s keep you quiet hm Birdy? Want papa to help you?” You nodded, struggling to find proper words as Kuroo massaged that spot within your spongy walls, edging you on closer and closer to a high. Bokuto pulled his thumb from your lips with a pop and was back to standing. He eased his belt off, unzipping his slacks to easily pull his cock free of its confines. It was semi hard as he held it towards your face, watching the ways your eyes glazed with desire and your mouth lulled open submissively. “That’s it pretty girl.” He praised, easing his length between your lips. You kept your eyes glued on him as he pushed all the way into your shallowed cheeks, gagging ever so softly as his tip brushed against the back of your throat. Bokuto groaned softly, rolling his hips at a low pace so he wouldn’t make too much noise. He ran his fingers through your hair, grabbing a handful at the nape of your neck that had your eyes watering. He looked to Kuroo again to see he was blushing a bit , eyes clouded with desire as he watched Bokuto thrust into your pretty mouth. “Sounds good, what day do you think we can have this all planned?” Kuroo spoke into the phone, the pace of his fingers suddenly picking up within your clamping walls. It had you gagging around Bokuto, fists curling up tight as you sat on the very edge of pleasure. Bokuto had to lick his lips, picking up his pace just a little bit as your little moans of delight sent vibrations all the way up his spine. “Good girl, let’s both cum for daddy and give him double the luck? Can you do that for me Birdy~?” You nodded as best you could, nosing into his pelvic bone as he stuffed your mouth with his cock. Kuroo was smirking from ear to ear at that remark, and yet his voice stayed so professional over the phone. Bokuto’s grip on your hair tightened as he picked up his pace, the lewd sounds of him thrusting into your mouth almost making him moan out loud. You had such a perfect mouth, and you took him so well as he fucked into your hallowed cheeks. You could feel the way he pulsed against your tongue, drools dribbling down your chin as you let out the softest whimpers around his shaft. When your core clumped down on Kuroo’s fingers he had to take a deep breathe, his smirk grown to it usual cat like grin as his employer gave his usual bullshit ending speech. Kuroo took that has his que to press harshly against your sweet spot. Your eyes widened, body jolting as you gagged on Bokuto’s cock and finally gushed over Kuroo’s fingers. His fingers kept up that pace so you could ride out the high, the feeling of you squirming and whimpering in his lap only making it all that much more satisfying. All the while Bokuto bit back a moan, finishing quicker than usual as he watched you crumble so easily under Kuroo’s touch. He saw the way your cheeks bulged, tears finally spilling as he shot his warm load down your throat. “Thank you so much Sir for your time, I look forward to working with you.” Kuroo spoke, before he hung up the phone. As soon as the conversation was done let out a hearty laugh, his fingers finally slowly down between your throbbing walls. “I got the promotion!! It was going south so it’s a good thing Bokuto came home when he did.” “Congrats babe...” Bokuto huffed out, his cheeks still a bit red as he slowly pulled out of your mouth. He groaned softly when he pulled out with a pop, watching your naked form slump into Kuroo’s lap. Kuroo hummed, finally letting go of your pinned arms so he could massage them out instead. “C-congratulations Daddy...~” Your voice was raspy as you spoke, which made both of the boys chuckle softly. “I couldn’t have done it without you and this perfect pussy kitten~” Kuroo teased, allowing you to nuzzle yourself in his lap to calm down after the high of your orgasm. Kuroo looked up to Bokuto then, brows furrowed when he finally noticed the blood that stained Bokuto’s shirt. “Oh? A messy day huh? Why don’t we all shower together then?” “Movie night?” You questioned softly, finally rubbing away the drool that tried to dry on your chin. Kuroo held you tighter then, pressing a kiss to your hairline. Bokuto happily agreed, stripping down right there in the office. “Oh fuck yea. We’re cuddling all night long.”

[alpacaparkaseok]

The Pact - Date #3

Pairing/Genre: OT7 BTS x reader (not poly), idol!BTS, best friend BTS

Word Count: 7.7k

Premise: The truth about the pact the boys have about you has been revealed. What happens when you agree to go on a single date with each of them?

Warnings: none, BUT THE FLUFF IS COMING DOWN FULL FORCE YA’LL

a/n: don’t forget, I taking your guys’ comments/reactions into account for this series, so please let me know what your thoughts are! of course, at the end we’ll really take a deeper look at all of the dates and what stood out the most, but I would love to hear from you about this one!! love you all, enjoy!

Date #3

series masterlist ∆∆∆ join the taglist

The more time has passed, the more you fully come to realize that if you have been that affected by two dates, you are in no way prepared for the five that remain.

Nope. Not one bit.

It was Thursday when Jungkook finally texted to check that you were free around eleven. Your heart leapt, finally. A date that you wouldn’t have to spend all day moping around waiting for.

So obviously, you were ready by 9. You know, just in case.

You’d been instructed to wear casual clothes, something that you rejoiced in. Donning your sweater with the word Harvard in thick blue letters spanning the front and a pair of skinny jeans, you felt right at home.

The boys never missed a chance to tease you about your Harvard sweatshirt, and for some reason they never believed your lie that you actually went there. Of course, that might be due to the fact that they were very much aware of your current schooling situation and it was most definitely not Harvard.

But hey...attending one of the top universities in South Korea wasn’t bad, either.

Currently you were perched on the end of your bed, partly due to the fact that if you went anywhere else you would most certainly just end up staring out the window at every car that passed by. Not wanting to look like a nosy neighbor, you’d confined yourself to your room to wait out the morning.

In the hours that pass, your thoughts are completely occupied by the two boys you shared the last couple of Saturdays with.

It would be a lie to say that you don’t replay the image of Taehyung standing in your doorway every night as you tried to sleep, his hair a fluffy mess and that cable knit sweater proving to be your doom.

Your thoughts were usually interrupted as you took your bracelet off and stared at it, imagining Hobi delicately placing each individual bead it it’s place. It’s when your hand burns with the memory of his gentle kiss on your palm that you finally set the bracelet down and let out a frustrated sigh.

Yeah...Jimin was wrong when he invited you to just think of these as nice, friendly dates.

He probably knew it, too.

“Ok,” you breathe out, closing your eyes and focusing on the rise and fall of your chest. “Just...enjoy it.”

Enjoy it you shall.

That’s the thing that carries you through the waiting, still just breathing in and out and mentally preparing yourself for all that awaits you today.

You get so carried away in your attempts to calm down that the knock on your front door comes before you realize how much time has passed. Taking one more steadying breath, you get up from your bed and amble down the hallway to the door.

Pausing for a moment, you realize that you truly have no idea who might be on the other side of that door. The thought makes you smile. You’ve always loved a good mystery.

Cracking open the door, you can’t help but smile as the figure before you has their back turned to you. At the sound of your quiet giggle, they turn around, eyes a little wide.

A nervous smile in place, Namjoon leans forward ever so slightly. Almost as though he’s being pulled in by your personal gravity. “Morning,” he says almost as an afterthought, his voice low.

“Good morning,” you respond, throwing the door open the rest of the way. “So you’re lucky number three?”

“Well, you know what they say.”

You busy yourself with grabbing your bag and double checking that you have everything. “What do they say?”

Namjoon shrugs, his nervous smile growing until it’s bordering on giddiness. “Third time’s a charm.”

Indeed.

Once you’ve ascertained that you have everything you’ll need (you made sure to replenish your mint stash earlier this week), you’re stepping out into the slightly brisk air and locking the door behind you.

The sound of keys jingling near your ear has you turning to face Namjoon, who wears an oversized, dark plaid shirt that’s open to reveal his black t-shirt beneath it. The picture of casual coolness, paired with his dark wash jeans and sneakers, the look is complete with the way his dimples poke out as he holds up the keys to your eye level.

“Guess who’s driving?” He teases in a sing-song voice, making you laugh as you swipe the keys from him. As the two of you descend the stairs toward the car, you tilt your head to the side.

“How did you get here?” Then, turning to him with wide eyes, “You didn’t drive yourself, right?”

He’s quick to shake his head, pointing out a car that’s turning around at the end of your street and slowly making its way back toward you two. “The guys dropped me off.”

The thought of Namjoon in a car with some of the boys and the rest trailing after them in a separate vehicle is endearing, while also hilarious. “All of them?”

“Yep,” he confirms. “Every last one of them.”

As the car draws nearer, you see the windows roll down and someone with familiar black, fluffy hair sticks their head out. Like a dog pile, another head hovers beside them.

Taehyung and Jimin.

Oh, and there’s Jungkook somehow managing to wiggle in between them.

“We apologize in advance, jagiya,” Jimin croons loudly with a teasing smirk. “At least try to enjoy yourself.”

You snort, clicking the button to unlock the car and laughing even harder when Hobi jumps at the sound of the horn. He sits in the passenger seat beside Jin, who drives. The two merely wave before mumbling something to each other that makes them laugh.

“Where’s Yoongi?” You ask, frowning as you do a head count and not finding him anywhere. In response, a pale hand coming from what must be the very back row of the car worms its way forward to the open window. You swear you can almost hear his disgruntled greeting, but it’s drowned out as Taehyung excitedly speaks up.

“Good luck trying to beat me, hyung,” he teases, shooting Namjoon a sweet smile that’s at odds with his teasing comment.

Namjoon just shrugs, utterly unphased as he follows you around the car and opens the drivers side with smooth precision. “Shouldn’t be too hard.”

This encourages a round of ooh-ing that only serves to make you laugh even as you tuck away the momentary competitive side of Namjoon. Calm, calculated, and - if you’re reading that steely look in his eyes correctly - utterly in the zone.

Oh, you’re definitely enjoying this way more than you should.

“Drive safe!” The boys shout out amidst jeering comments directed toward Namjoon and his lack of driving abilities. With a final wave, they’re speeding off down the street. Once they’ve disappeared from sight, you notice the way Namjoon’s shoulders relax. He hurries over to the passenger side, hopping in and buckling up before fiddling with his phone.

“So...where to?” You ask, buckled up and ready to go. You tap the steering wheel excitedly, already feeling hyped up from the short interaction with everyone.

You miss seeing them all together. There’s a reason why you’re friends with the entire group.

“I put the address into the car,” Namjoon explains. “It should give you directions as we go.”

Arching a brow at him, you don’t shift into drive just yet. “So I’m driving us there, but I don’t get to know what the end location is?”

Smiling softly, Namjoon nods. “Exactly. You’re so smart, have I ever told you that?”

Scowling, you press the green button that appears on the screen and a warm female voice instructs you to drive to the stop sign and turn left.

You hum, pondering the slightly sarcastic question. “I’m not sure. But that’s definitely a sign that you should tell me more often.”

“I’ll make note of that.”

With a glance at the screen, you see the estimated driving time. “We’re leaving Seoul?”

From your peripheral, you notice Namjoon’s worried expression. “Is that alright? We can find something to do around here, it’s just-”

“No,” you rush to reassure him. “I was just surprised, that’s all.” It won’t be a particularly long drive, just over an hour, but you certainly weren’t expecting that.

Something tells you that there are plenty more surprises waiting for you today.

It doesn’t take long before the two of you slip into an easy conversation, Namjoon relating his latest experiences in his efforts to add something eye-catching to his studio.

“Like what?” You ask. “I love your studio the way it is.”

Namjoon looks over at you, smiling softly. “Really? I don’t know...I just feel like something’s missing.”

“Well, we’ll keep an eye out for something today,” you promise, relaxing now that you’re on the freeway and in the flow of traffic. “Like, do you want something to hang up? Or something to go on your desk?”

He shrugs, taking a moment to roll his window down and close his eyes as it runs through his hair. “I already have a bunch of stuff on the wall, and if I put anything on my desk-”

“Right, you’ll spill on it.”

“Exactly.” You keep your eyes on the road, entirely missing the fond look he gives you.

“So basically, you don’t need anything.”

He huffs a sigh, rolling the window back up and sinking down into the seat. “No, I do, I just don’t know what.”

“Mmm.”

“Hey,” Namjoon cuts, giving you a dramatic glare. “Don’t mock me.”

Feigning innocence, you peek over at him. “I’m not!”

“Yah, just drive.”

“I am!”

Despite the bickering, you can’t fight the smile edging its way onto your features. A glance over at Namjoon shows that he’s having the same issue, his face turned away from you but failing to hide the silly grin he’s attempting to hide as his fingers curl at his lips. It’s a habit he’s had for as long as you’ve known him, one that often makes its way into many photos.

“Prepare to take exit 14,” the voice instructs, and you make your way over to the far lane, eyeing the looming sign that will announce what exit it’s for. Once the sign comes into view, you give Namjoon a puzzled look.

“We’re going to Anyang?”

It’s not that you have anything against the city, it’s just that...well, what is there in Anyang that isn’t in Seoul?

“See? Super intelligent.” It’s the only response you get from Namjoon, but it has you rolling your eyes in an effort to counter the butterflies that erupt in your stomach at the way he’s looking at you.

In a couple of minutes you’re turning onto a relatively quiet street, only a few random people mulling about, enjoying their weekend. Namjoon points out an entrance to a parking lot that you would have completely missed due to its hidden nature. Once you’re parked and dwarfed between the buildings surrounding the little lot, you jump out of the car and make a show of stretching your legs.

Namjoon mimics you, a loud yet satisfying yawn coming from him. “Hey, are you hungry now or are you good to wait a little while?”

You pause, internally wondering. “I think I’m good for a while.”

“Great.” Rubbing his hands together, he comes to stand beside you. “Let’s go, then.”

You fall into step beside him. “Woah, you still haven’t told me where- oh.”

The two of you have rounded a corner and now stand in front of a nondescript building. Its sage green paint is chipping a bit, giving it a rustic feel that is only accentuated by the gold lettering above the door.

Wanderers & Travelers

However, it’s not the homey feel or the tasteful name that has you stopping in your tracks. It’s what you see inside, through the large windows.

Without a single word, you step forward as though in a daze. The little bell above the door chimes as you walk in, announcing your arrival. And, as though the entire thing couldn’t get better, the scent hits you.

The smell of old and new books, some leather bound and some hard backed, dives into your senses and leaves you whirling.

The walls in here are painted some shade of sky blue, complementing the deep wood shelves. It’s quiet in here, the only sound being that of shuffling feet.

If you blink, you’re afraid it might all vanish.

“Oh! You’re here!”

Turning to your left, you see a woman with flecks of white in her hair, smiling warmly at you and Namjoon. If you’re being completely, honest, you’d nearly forgotten that Namjoon was there.

The woman descends the final few steps of the creaky staircase, keeping a friendly distance as she nods at the two of you. “You were right,” she remarks to Namjoon. Then, to you with a teasing smirk, “You look like you’ve never seen a bookstore before.”

You sputter for the right words. “I- yeah, but this-”

“Is no ordinary bookstore,” Namjoon finishes for you, a hand at your elbow. You can’t help but lean into his touch, momentarily forgetting the rows and rows of shelves just a few steps away as Namjoon involuntarily steps a little closer.

“Ah, right. Well, first thing’s first: I’m Choi Min-jee. And this is my bookstore,” she gestures to the endless rows of bookshelves, and you wonder for a moment how all of these can fit in the building. It looks so much smaller from the outside.

Min-jee motions for you to follow her, and she leads the two of you to the nearest bookshelf. “These books range in languages and age, you never know what you might find. This shop has been in my family for five generations now - we’ve collected our fair share of books and other antique items.” With a little wink, she steps back. “Take your time, and let me know if you have any questions. Oh, and the upstairs is open now.”

Namjoon perks up at this, looking over from where he’d pulled a book off the shelf. “Really? We’ll have to look up there!”

“Please do! I’m off to practice piano.” With that, she whisks away, leaving you to your own devices.

You stare after her in awe, mouth slightly ajar. It makes Namjoon chuckle quietly, he must know the feeling.

“I wanna be her when I grow up,” you whisper, earning a louder chuckle from the man.

“Same.” Namjoon heads deeper into the shelves, and you follow after him. He glances back at you over his shoulder. “This is my favorite place.”

“I take it you’re a regular?” You ask, eyes catching on a bright blue book with frayed binding. Pausing, you ease it from its spot. “Hm… ‘The Cottage by the Sea’.” You run my hand over the shiny inlay, a seashell glinting up at you. “Why do I feel like I just entered the world of ‘Little Women’?”

Namjoon snorts, wandering back over to you and gazing down at the book. He grabs the one that occupied the spot next to it on the shelf, the deep red absorbing in all the surrounding light. “You’re definitely Jo.”

“Really?” You ask, gently flipping through the first few pages and trying to find a publish date. “I always thought that I was more of an Amy.”

Namjoon looks appalled, tearing his eyes away from his book. “What? No. In what world are you Amy?”

“Hey! Don’t act like she’s a bad person,” You whine, bringing the book close to your chest. “She was just...trying to survive.”

Huffing loudly and obnoxiously, Namjoon heads over to the other aisle, peeking at you through the gaps in the shelf. “She got everything she ever wanted, without hardly having to ask for it. Are you telling me that you have everything you ever wanted?”

There’s a skylight above you, allowing the lazy afternoon sun to filter in and play with the lighter tones in Namjoon’s hair. He looks at you with his ferociously focused gaze, something that you had never squirmed under before but now find your cheeks burning as he doesn’t look away.

You sigh contentedly. “More or less. Look at me, I’m surrounded by books.”

Namjoon gets closer to the shelves, leaning down to be eye-level with you through the shelves. “So what’s missing?”

“Hmm?” You hum, getting a little lost as music starts up somewhere. You realize with a start that this must be what Min-jee meant by practicing piano, as the soft sound comes from somewhere hidden.

There’s a little smile on Namjoon’s face, just enough for a dimple to appear. “You said more or less. What are you missing still?”

Edging a little closer and nearly closing your eyes at the smell of leather, you’re tempted to reach through the shelf and poke at the little indent in his cheek. “Just your glasses, I think. I love it when you wear your glasses.”

The statement takes him by surprise, Namjoon’s dragon-like gaze dropping and a flush taking over his features before he steps back. “Hmph.” With that, he continues down the aisle, the red book still in his hands and the blue in yours. “I still think you would be Jo, though.”

“Why?”

The two of you match footsteps, languidly walking along the seemingly endless rows. You catch glimpses of him through the books, a soft dimpled smile on his face as he looks down at his feet. It’s enough to make your coy smile grow, and you clutch the book tighter to your chest.

Finally, Namjoon comes to a stop as another book catches his eye. You take the opportunity to round the corner and enter the aisle he stands in, feet carrying you closer to him. Just as you’re about to reach his side, he speaks.

“Jo is...well, for one, she’s a dreamer. And we both know you’ve got a lot of dreams in that head of yours.” He taps your forehead for emphasis, side-smile growing when you scowl. “But she’s a realistic dreamer. You’ve given up a lot for your dreams, but I believe that you’d leave it all behind if someone you loved was in need of you.”

You blink, unprepared for the genuine compliment.

“And,” Namjoon says breathily, sliding the book back into its place and turning on his heel to walk away. “You two share a tendency to be oblivious to others feelings for you.”

He keeps walking, leaving you to become a sputtering mess before launching yourself after him. “I- we what?!” You all but screech, wincing as you sound twice as loud in the empty shop. “I am not oblivious-”

With a triumphant smirk, Namjoon heads down a little slope that leads toward a sitting area. “Be honest with yourself. You wouldn’t have had any idea about the pact or anything if Jungkook hadn’t spilled it.”

“But that’s not my fault!” You defend, glaring defiantly at his back. “You guys had that under lock and key!”

Diving into another row, Namjoon looks contemplative. “Ok, that may be true. But tell me the truth: did you ever once suspect that...I don’t know, there might be something more going on? Even just once?”

You stand out in the main walkway still, frozen by his question. “Er…” Pausing to think, you squint down at the book still in your hands.

Of course there were moments that had your heart pumping a little faster and a blush rising to your cheeks. Movie nights always meant some form of cuddling, but you quickly just assumed that it was all part of the friendship. Good morning texts that made you sink back into your pillows with a lazy smile, or the little facts that one of the boys would remember about you always made you stop and wonder.

But you never actually entertained the idea. It all seemed too…

“Unrealistic,” you mumble aloud. When Namjoon looks at you quizzically, you walk down a few rows until something catches your eye. You delight in the fact that now he’s following you. “I guess I had little moments where I wondered, but it just seemed like wishful thinking.”

Stopping near the end of the row and looking up at the top shelf, you wiggle on your tip-toes trying to grab a book. Your fingers barely graze the spine of the book before a warm presence overshadows you and Namjoon’s fingers ghost over your own before tugging the brown book from its spot. Still pressed against your back, his light breathing makes the hair on the back of your neck tingle as he lowers the book into your waiting hands.

“Moments like this?” He whispers, hands coming to rest just above your hips.

Suddenly, you recall a moment from months before, when you’d been in a similar situation. The boys had invited you over for some breakfast on one of their rare morning’s off. You’d wanted some cereal, only to find the bowls on the very top shelf. Namjoon had come to your rescue, pulling the exact same move before awkwardly pausing and looking as though he’d wanted to say something. He hadn’t, and instead rushed out of the kitchen before you could even utter a ‘thank you’.

Turning around in his grasp, you can see that he wears a similar expression as before. This time, however, he looks determined to say whatever comes to mind.

With a quiet voice you whisper, “Who in their right mind puts bowls on the top shelf?”

Namjoon’s grip on your hips tightens as he throws his head back and laughs, the kind of laugh that sinks right into your bones. All you can do is watch him, feeling like it’s the first time you’ve ever seen him. Perhaps it’s the first time you’ve ever allowed yourself to look freely.

“Ah, so you did notice,” he whispers back. “You acted like nothing happened, so I figured I was in the clear.”

With a roll of your eyes, you’re stepping out of his grasp and taking a look down at the new book in your hand. “With you, Mr. Kim, we’re never in the clear.”

He lets out a low hiss, but lets you walk away. Not like you realize he’s not following you anymore, you’re idly wandering around while thumbing through the mystery novel. It looks like it might be an original copy from one of your favorite authors. One that passed away in the 1950’s, but still stands out among the countless authors that have come after them.

You’ve made it down to the small sitting area, where a large fireplace is crackling.

“Huh,” you smile. As if this place couldn’t get any better. Plopping down on the couch, you let out a sigh at how the cushions sink and welcome you into their warm embrace. Setting the blue book off to the side, you open up the brown one and begin to read.

You’ve nearly completed the first chapter - knees tucked to your chest as you lean against the arm of the couch - when you hear footsteps approaching.

Expecting it to be Namjoon, you glance over your shoulder with a smile. It’s Min-jee, who returns the smile with a knowing look. You listen closely and realize that her piano practice must be over. Classical music plays over the speakers in the shop instead.

“Namjoon’s gone upstairs,” she explains, coming to adjust something in the fireplace. “He said something about finding an item for his studio.”

You close the book softly, stretching before sitting up straight. “What’s upstairs? More books?”

“No, we’ve expanded our antique selection, there’s an assortment of desks and chairs up there, among other things.”

Making an ‘o’ with your mouth, you get up. “This place is amazing, by the way.” You hold up the brown book with an excited expression. “I found this - I think it’s an original! How much is it?”

Min-jee makes her way over to you, smiling softly as she recognizes the book. “You’re a fan of this author too, huh? My grandad used to read these to me back before I had to start running the shop.” She offers you a fond look. “Oh, and Namjoon told me to put whatever you like on his tab. So don’t worry about it. Take the book.”

She must notice your shock, because she places a comforting hand on your shoulder and squeezes it gently. “He also told me that you might be hesitant to get anything because of that. But honestly, get it. And ‘The Cottage by the Sea’. That’s one of my favorites, actually.” Min-jee nods at the blue book with its golden seashell.

“Ah, he knows me too well,” you sigh. “This might be silly to ask, but...do you think it’s alright? You know, to just get them?”

Min-jee, to your eternal gratitude, doesn’t laugh at your question. Instead, she sees right through you, to the worry in your heart.  The last thing you want is to take advantage of any of the boys. “It would make him happy,” she responds, watching your reaction carefully. You immediately let out a sigh of relief, nodding and picking up the books.

“Alright,” you concede. “I’ll get them, then.”

“Great! I’ll take them up front and hold them for you, if you’d like.”

“That’s perfect.”

While she whisks away your books, you follow after her until you reach the staircase. She nods encouragingly, and you head up.

Clearing the stairs, it doesn’t take long to locate Namjoon. He’s standing in front of a large wardrobe, inspecting every inch of it. The sight makes you smile, enjoying the way he’s chewing on the inside of the cheek.

“Don’t tell me that’s what you’re getting for the studio,” you drawl, making your way toward him. He looks back at you, a wide smile interrupting his cheek chewing.

“I mean...no, but look at it!” He exclaims. “It’s beautiful, isn't it? Honestly, if I moved some things around, I could probably make it fit.”

You reach the wardrobe, marveling at the expert craftsmanship. “It’s gorgeous. But what would you even put in it? It’s not like you take all of your coats to the studio. And you want your trophies to be visible, don’t you?”

This thing must weigh a ton, the wood is thick and the hinges smooth. “Hmm...no, but I can think of something else I could hide away in here.” The way Namjoon glances over at you with a sly grin makes you stumble back, red rushing to your cheeks as you suddenly become preoccupied with a very old typewriter.

“What would that be?” You venture, running your fingers over the keyboard. You’re waiting for his answer, which you’re sure will be a single word - you. However, just as he’s opening his mouth and looking like he’s garnering the courage to say it, the creaky staircase announces someone’s arrival.

At first you think nothing of it, but Min-jee’s voice is loud. Loud enough that you know she’s trying to be heard.

“I told you, we don’t sell anything BTS related in this store.” She says, and you and Namjoon share a puzzled look.

A couple of voices respond, but one in particular stands out as she raises her voice. “I swear, I saw Kim Namjoon walking around in here just a few minutes ago!”

Their footsteps are growing closer, and you suddenly realize that this is Min-jee’s way of warning you two.

Rushing over to Namjoon’s side, you look around frantically. “Is there another way out?” You whisper. Clearly the staircase is blocked at the moment. When he shakes his head, you’re about ready to suggest causing a distraction but he suddenly gasps.

Quickly and quietly, he’s swinging open the wardrobe and nudging you inside, quickly following. You raise your eyebrows, mouth opening to ask him just how this is going to help anything, but he allows the door to swing shut and presses a hand against your mouth.

Back pressed against the back of the wardrobe and Namjoon looming over you, the two of you hardly dare to breathe as you strain to listen to what’s going on outside.

“I’m pretty sure I would know if he was in my shop,” Min-jee is saying, sounding much closer now. “And right now the upstairs is off-limits, so please-”

“Look, I know I must sound crazy, but I’m absolutely positive that I saw him in here. I was just outside and he went up the stairs! And now you expect me to believe what you’re saying?”

You keep your eyes trained on the thin opening where light is streaming in, trying to see what’s going on. Namjoon, however, shuffles a little closer, hand slipping from your mouth and staring down at you. He braces his hands on either side of your head, needing to bend over a little bit due to the small space.

“For the last time,” Min-jee defends, “the upstairs portion of this shop is closed. As you can tell, nobody is up here besides us. If you wish to continue this conversation, I would simply ask that we do it downstairs.”

You bite your lip, looking up at Namjoon and about to whisper something about how Min-jee deserves a raise. The words die on your tongue, however, when you finally catch sight of him.

Namjoon is slouching a bit, and you realize that his hands are on either side of your head. His hair is slightly mussed, from what you’re unsure. However, that’s not what has your breath catching in your throat.

He’s looking down at you in a way that suddenly makes you aware of just how small the wardrobe is, and has you mentally cursing yourself for coming up here in the first place. Namjoon is looking at you, looking at you in a way that you immediately recognize.

Like it’s the first time he’s allowed himself to.

You watch the way his eyes follow the way your throat constricts as you swallow, the way they trace the slope of your nose and the dip above your lip.

The voices fade away as Namjoon’s fingers feather through your hair, light enough to make your heart melt. He does so slowly, eyes reading your own in order to see if he’s somehow crossed a line that he shouldn’t have.

You, however, are sick of all these dumb lines and boundaries that have been set. Somehow, Namjoon must see that, because he’s opening his mouth and whispering out what he’s been thinking this entire time.

“You,” he mumbles as he watches the strand of hair he tucks behind your ear. Almost as though to verify that this is real, that it’s actually happening. “I’d tuck you away in here, and nobody would find us.”

Breathing has become impossible at this point.

“No prying eyes, no invisible lines to make sure I don’t cross,” he’s tracing the line of your jaw now, and you don’t miss the slight tremor in his hand. “Would you like that as much as I would?”

His eyes land on yours, eyebrows coming together as he awaits your answer. You would smile if you could, but you find that you’ve turned to putty at his touch. Instead, you slowly nod before breathing out, “Yes.”

That’s when you realize that Namjoon is just as tired of rules as you are. Namjoon, the dedicated leader that always makes sure everything is in order. Namjoon, who constantly forgets things like his phone and wallet, but never forgets to say please and thank you.

Namjoon, who leans impossibly closer until you’re closing your eyes for fear of going cross-eyed. His breath fans across your nose, acting as your only warning before his lips find yours.

Light as a feather against your mouth, Namjoon kisses you.

As you sigh against his lips, you suddenly understand why kissing was prohibited. Because right now, all that you can think of - every breath, every heartbeat - it’s all saying the same thing.

Namjoon.

Just as your hands find their way to his chest and bunching up the fabric, he’s jumping back with a gasp and stumbling through the door of the wardrobe. You see his wide eyes, but you’re too busy standing there completely frozen and praying that nobody is up here still.

He looks around frantically, but looks at you with utter horror as the same voice as before pipes up from downstairs.

“See! I’m telling you that someone is up there-”

“Oh! Did you see that? I think I just saw him taking the emergency exit!” Min-jee retorts, and you can picture her frantically pointing out the window in an effort to distract the girls. “Hurry! He looked like he was running!”

The bell above the door chimes, excited voices fading as the group exits the shop. However, their timely exit does little to soothe the raging heartbeat pounding against your ribs.

“I- I’m not supposed to do that,” Namjoon reminds himself aloud. “Please, I’m so sorry-”

“They’re gone!” Min-jee calls out, poking her head up as she ascends the stairs. She spots you still standing in the wardrobe. “Oh, so that’s where you were hiding. Anyway, I’ve locked up the front, so we shouldn’t be having any more trouble with that.”

You can only offer her a weak smile, Namjoon still staring at you with that horrible, guilt-ridden expression, which you’re dying to erase.

“Thank you,” you say when Min-jee begins to notice the odd silence. “We’ll be down in a second, I think.”

Namjoon nods along, finally looking away to check the time. “Actually, we’ve got a reservation,” your stomach flips at the thought of sitting through an entire meal with his guilty apologies, “is there a way we can sneak out of here without being seen?”

Min-jee blinks, looking between the two of you but not saying anything. “Ok...um, yeah. The back alleyway should be clear, it’ll lead to the parking lot.”

Finally stepping out of the wardrobe, you look back at it with a glare.

“So much for Narnia,” you mumble, closing the door.

ˆˆˆˆ

Min-jee quickly places your books in a bag - Namjoon ends up getting the red one as well - and offers it to you with a smile. Automatically you reach out for it, but so does Namjoon. The second your hands meet you can’t help but jump, and the bag falls to the floor.

“Oh no,” you whimper out, feeling sorry for the old books. Before you can lean down to get them, Namjoon’s swooping them up and keeping a firm grip on the bag. He mumbles out a soft, “sorry” before following Min-jee toward the back exit.

The two of you thank her profusely for the day, and you promise that you’ll return soon. There’s no way you can leave a place like that alone for very long. Namjoon smiles for a moment, looking pleased that he picked a good place. However, once he catches your eye, he’s back to chewing on the inside of his cheek.

Slyly sneaking down down the alleyway, it’s quiet between the two of you. No matter how hard you pinch yourself, your thoughts keep zoning in on the way Namjoon’s lips felt on yours...the way he looked at you just before he leaned in...how perfect everything had been until he’d come to his senses-

You’ve made it to the car, and you click the unlock button, jumping back as it honks. Man, you’ve got to get out of your head.

Namjoon hurries to set the bag in the backseat before rushing to the driver’s side, opening the door up for you with significantly less flourish than before.

Knowing Namjoon, it’s eating him up alive. And there’s no way you’re about to let a kiss - something to celebrate, in your opinion - ruin the rest of this date.

Especially when it may very well be the only one you get.

“Namjoon,” you say, walking slowly toward him. His eyes jump up to yours, and you can already see that he’s hard at work trying to pretend like everything is fine.

“We’re going to be about an hour early for our reservation,” Namjoon admits, running a hand through his hair and immediately trying to fix it after. “I’m sorry for rushing you out of there, I wasn’t thinking straight. You can go back in, if you want. I’ll wait out here until you’re ready-”

“Namjoon.” He quits his rambling, red cheeks somehow turning redder as you stop before him. “I wanted you to kiss me.”

At this, he lets the door fall shut. “You...did?”

Wanting nothing more than to dispel the awkward tension, you laugh. “Of course I did! I’d be an idiot if I didn’t! So please...it’s nobody’s fault. So what, you broke a stupid rule-”

“And I’ve hurt the guys in the process of breaking that rule,” Namjoon explains, looking at you with clear, pained eyes. “Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t me regretting kissing you because- w-well, that’s not the point!” Leaning back against the car, you follow suit just as a large stormcloud blocks out the sun. It’s going to rain soon.

“Namjoon, you’ve all found ways to skirt around the rules in some way,” you confess, remember Hobi’s sweet hand kiss and Taehyung’s forehead kiss. “Sure, you actually broke the rule, but nobody is going to hate you for it. Nobody. Least of all me.”

He leans his head back, closing his eyes as he lets out a long breath. “It’s just, we all agreed to give you enough space to make a clear decision if you felt like you wanted to make one at the end of all this,” he confesses, not seeing the way your eyes widen. Oh. “And I’ve completely screwed that up.”

Sighing, you squint as a fat raindrop lands on your nose. “Well, we’re on a date, aren’t we? People sometimes kiss- I mean, honestly, we could have done a lot worse-” Namjoon chokes on his spit at that. “But if you need something to blame, please don’t blame yourself. Because I love this date, and as far as I can tell, the kiss only made it better.”

He peeks one eye open at you. “Really?”

“Really.” You shrug. “And see? I really am Amy! I always get what I want!” You don’t add the fact that that wasn’t quite true with Hoseok or Taehyung. “If anything, blame the wardrobe. Wardrobes are wacky, anyways.”

Namjoon snorts, rolling his eyes. “Blame the wardrobe? Really?”

“Yeah! Sometimes they transport you to Narnia, sometimes they mess with your common sense,” you give him a pointed look, which he avoids. “So if the boys get all upset about it, just tell them it was the wardrobe. I’ll back you up on it.”

Finally, Namjoon laughs. Like, the annoying little hyena laugh that he hates but you secretly love. And when he looks back down at you and opens up the door, he doesn’t look so upset about it.

“Be honest, would you have rather gone to Narnia or been stuck in there with me?”

You feign annoyance. “Ugh, just get in the car.”

From the way your stomachs were rumbling and the rain was pouring, the two of you decided to bag the reservation. It was for some posh outdoor restaurant in Seoul that Namjoon pretended to be excited about.

Which is exactly how you ended up going through the McDonald’s drive thru and bringing it back to your place.

“Aren’t you on a diet or something?” You ask around your fries, eyes not leaving the television screen. The two of you had decided on Gone With the Wind, completely forgetting just how long it was.

Namjoon makes a noncommittal noise in the back of his throat, taking a swig of his drink. “Yeah, something like that. Today’s my cheat day, though.”

“Aw, you decided to spend your cheat day with me?” You tease. Namjoon rolls his eyes, finally deciding that maybe you really are Amy from Little Women. However, he can’t fight the feeling that he’s the Laurie to your Jo.

Not that he’ll be telling you that anytime soon. He’s certainly done enough today.

“More like our date happened to fall on my cheat day,” he bites back. “And I heard that they have really good cheesecake at that restaurant we bailed on.”

You hesitate before taking another bite of your food. “Should we have gone? They probably would’ve given us our food to go if we didn’t want to sit under the umbrellas. I feel bad, you made reservations and everything.”

Namjoon shrugs. “No, this is way better.” He holds up his McFlurry for emphasis. “They even had the cheesecake McFlurry back in season! Coincidence?”

“I think not!”

You both chuckle before falling back into the companionable silence you’d been in before. Over the course of the drive back to Seoul, you’d taken your time, stopping at a handful of little parks along the way. Namjoon had imitated the ducks before realizing how silly he looked, then hiding behind his hands for a solid five minutes before he could look you in the eyes again. Overall, it had been calm and relaxing.

As you watch Scarlett O’Hara flirting it up with different suitors on the screen, you can’t help but wonder if that’s you.

Sure, Gina told you back at the haunted house to just enjoy it. Chances are it was all just a phase, anyways. There was all of this romantic tension between you and the boys that would naturally fade away as their curiosity diminished after their dates.

At least, that’s what you assumed. However you’re quickly coming to realize that you’re a little out of depth here.

“You alright over there?” Namjoon asks, pulling you from your thoughts. “You have your thinking face on.”

You blink. “I have a thinking face?”

“Of course,” Namjoon replies as though it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You gonna tell me what’s got you so stressed?”

“No,” you say a little too quickly. “I’m just...thinking about the movie.” Not entirely a lie.

You know he won’t push it if you don’t want to talk about it, but you take a little bit of enjoyment in the way his lip pouts out. “Alright, if you say so.”

Only a few more minutes pass before he speaks up again, sounding a little hesitant. “You know that this is a long movie…”

“Oh, should we end it here?” You ask, a little disappointed because you were just getting to one of your favorite parts. “You don’t need to feel like you have to stay-”

“No, not that. I’m gonna finish the movie. It’s just,” he wipes his fingers off on a spare napkin before scooting a little closer to you. “Long movies call for cuddling, don’t you think?”

You nearly choke on your saliva. “You- you, as in Kim Namjoon, want to cuddle? You’re into cuddling?”

He laughs, tugging on your arm until you give in and collapse against his side. You hope that your content sigh isn’t too noticeable when he drapes an arm around your shoulder. “It just depends sometimes. But yes, I am. At the appropriate times.”

“Ah, and long movies-”

“Are the epitome of the appropriate time,” he explains, lightly pinching your arm when you let out a wry laugh.

“Hey!” You cry out, only to be shushed by him.

“Shhh, I’m trying to watch this.”

You just can’t find it in you to be annoyed.

You’re asleep before the film is over, despite the fact that the sun barely went down. Something about having a full stomach and leaning your head on Namjoon’s shoulder just lulled you right to sleep.

You stir a little when Namjoon fidgets, pulling his phone out to call someone. His voice is deep and quiet, trying not to wake you.

“Hey, can you pick me up now?”

Despite your half-asleep state, you crack a smile. It’s quiet, but you can hear a familiar voice on the other side of the phone.

“Yeah, I’m close to there right now. Be there in a couple minutes. You’re at her apartment, right?”

“Thanks. Yeah, she’s conked out on the couch.”

There’s a laugh ringing through the phone. “Cute. Make sure she rests up, she’ll need it for our date next week.”

Namjoon sighs, not quite annoyed but not exactly pleased, either. “Yah, just hurry over.” He pauses for a moment. “Do you think I should wake her up to say goodbye?”

“Your call. But I mean, it’s not like you’re gonna give her a kiss goodbye. If she’s that tired, I’d just let her sleep.”

Your cheeks involuntarily turn red, and you can only imagine the way Namjoon looks right now. It’s his silence that gives him away.

“Hyung...what-”

“Text me when you get here,” Namjoon says, and suddenly the call ends.

Oh, he’s in for it tonight.

Stretching and trying to look like you totally weren’t just eavesdropping, you crack open your eyes to see Namjoon looking down at you with an amused expression.

“I would tell you that you missed the ending, but something tells me you’ve seen it before,” he drawls.

You chuckle breathily, yawning as you stretch your arms over your head. “Yeah, a couple of times.”

“I���m about to head out,” Namjoon begins, back to chewing on the inside of his cheek. “But thank you for going out with me. I seriously...it was just the best.” He smiles softly, and you wish you could have a picture of it.

Instead, you opt for nuzzling back into his side. “Aren’t I supposed to be the one thanking you? It was great, Namjoon-ah. I’ll have to read that book you got some time.”

He hums, returning the sentiment. “Yeah, we’ll do a book swap.” His phone lights up, but before you can see who it’s from, he’s snatching it up and jumping up from the couch. “They’re here.”

It’s tempting to not resort to begging him to stay a little longer - if only for the sake of his warmth which is quickly fading as he retreats to the door. However, you only pad after him, stopping him before he reaches the door.

“Thank you,” you whisper against his chest. “Tell everyone I say hello.”

“I will.” And with a rush of cool air, he’s out the door.

Gone, leaving you to stare blankly and wonder what just happened today.

And worse yet, what’s yet to come.

main masterlist

again, I’d love to hear from you! ESPECIALLY BECAUSE THINGS ARE ESCALATING!! thoughts, what you liked, what you didn’t, what’s been your fav so far...general screaming, it’s all great. THANK YOU!!!

taglist is open, click on the link at the top of the post or let me know if you’d like to join!

taglist: @secretlycrazyhummingbird @marianeamine @hqtetsurou@baepsaetay @dreamcatcherjiah @kookie-vuitton @thecaffeinatedscribbles​ @moon-write​ @fangirl125reader​ @heishichoulevi​ @knjkitten​ @sacha-cff​ @vik7797​  @eusticenatalie​ @hesmyphenominiall​ @miriamxsworld​ @kayahay​ @delacyrose224  @luvtaeha​ @fanfictionreader05 @mininimmy​ @dreadity​  @starlight-night0​ @luzaroon​ @seaoffangirling​ @prachi05 @fangirl125reader​ @bluehairedotakugem​ @hunnibxbe​ @kayahay​ @fanfictionreader05 @seokjinmoonfics​ @delacyrose224

[kidinthenight]

hi :D i know it's been a while but i've been trying to learn new stuff to bring you better content!

this is a small gift i've made to celebrate two special things. first of all, that i reached 100 followers :D thank you so much!!! and... because it was selena gomez birthday!!!

download link and more info below the cut!

i found this AMAZING mesh by maurvinni and I HAD TO convert it into the game, it's just too cute.

poly count is a bit high though, sorry! i lowered it a little bit but it wasn't possible to keep all it's charm and a low poly count at the same time :(

it has 784 polys, it's not insane. but it's not low either compared to the original.

there's also some clipping while juggling cups, but i have no idea if that's even fixable.

as always, you can only have ONE default replacement, so make sure to take out any mug replacement you might have before using mine.

i hope you enjoy it and please let me know if there's anything wrong with it <3

DOWNLOAD: sfs | mediafire

credits: maurvinni, for their lovely mesh. theninthwave, for their package i used to make this default. aaand huge thanks to fire_flower, for her blender tutorials <3

[egyptsblackrose]

Dancing with Strangers

Ok so, theres a Playlist I’m loving right now on YouTube called “Dancing between Gojo and Kakashi but you can feel the sexual tension growing by the minute”, posted by itsharley. I made a short story post on the video and people liked it, so here’s the story that’s been living in my head rent free for the past week! This is a regular world AU btw

Warnings: a little suggestive behaviour later, spicy stuff wont be added till later... other than that enjoy!

Part 1-

Y/N L/N had a pretty normal life for the first few years of her life. Her parents were wonderful, kind people who were well respected and successful in their fields of work, both determined to give their precious daughter the best upbringing they could. Things only changed because both were offered a dream promotion. The catch? They had to move to Japan for the foreseeable future.

At first Y/N was devastated. She didn’t want to move away from her beloved grandparents and friends, she was just about to start primary school, and she didn’t know ANY Japanese! What if people were mean to her because she was different? However those worries soon melted away.

Their home was a stunning penthouse apartment in Hiroshima, close to Y/N’s new school, with beautiful views and amazing restaurants all around. There was even a private tutor to help Y/N learn Japanese faster so she wouldn’t be at a disadvantage from the other kids, but even though they were living in Japan, only their native language was spoken in their home. Her parents were adamant that she was smart enough to learn two languages at once, and they weren’t wrong.

In the beginning, Y/N was too shy to really try make friends, worried that she would say something wrong and people would laugh at her, or she’d pronounce something weird and people would mock her. Those fears soon disappeared also, however, when Y/N met Miku and Sakura. Both girls were very sweet, they thought her accent was cute and soon encouraged Y/N to speak more.

The 3 were inseparable, going to concerts together, cafes after school, watching movies and having sleepovers every weekend. It was more like having sisters! So when Y/N had to move back home when she was 15, the 3 were heartbroken. They shed many tears together, and at the airport the 3 and clutched at each other in a group hug, reluctant to separate.

But Y/N was a loyal soul, and the 3 talked over chat every day, and face timed each other every weekend night, watching movies and anime’s together, complaining about school, family and boys. It was painful for Y/N, she felt like she was away from home most of the time. But her friends were good people and never lost their bond.

Now finishing their final years at Uni, the 3 were face timing while finishing their papers, encouraging each other to finish and stay positive as they talked about their plans and ideas for their final year. That was when Y/N discovered the Japanese exchange program her Uni had in place.

Gojo and Kakasi had been friends for as long as they both could remember, meeting back in school, insisting on going to the same uni, and now working together in the police force as partners. The two were often mistaken as lovers, but they repeated many times that they were just very similar in personality, got along like brothers rather than friends, and were both very straight.

While the 2 were undeniably attractive it was Gojo who had the natural charisma out of them that many young women were charmed by, finding it easy to ignore his weird traits. He could never seem to keep a relationship going past a one night stand however, he was just too free willed and whimsical to be tied down. On the other hand- Kakashi- though dashing in his own right and was incredibly sweet to anyone who bothered to get to know him, seemed to fumble with his words a lot of the time, becoming embarrassed and flustered easily, backing out of any interaction that became too bold. The two were opposites, and they soon realised this as young men, observing how the other was strong where they had weaknesses.

It was Gojos idea (of course it was) to “team up” when it came to women. He was the hook, drawing beauties in and charming their pants off, and Kakashi was the sweetheart who convinced them to stay when they both approved of the woman. Sometimes for months, sometimes just for a few days of fun. Either way it was a win win for the men, Gojo received a proper taste of a real relationship (be it poly, as a 3) and Kakashi earned some much needed experience and confidence to help at least lesson his shyness.

But now they were not young men, they were MEN. Successful, powerful, admired men that had bright futures ahead of them and a brotherly bond stronger than ever. There was of course, something rather vital missing from their lives.

The two had been working stupid long shifts, with barely a day off to rest for far too long, and both males were pent up, and needed to drink and let off some steam.

Entering the club, Gojo immediately grinned at the low lights; pounding base of “Hotel Room” hitting his ears, the smell of perfume, sweat and booze. “The Ninja Shrine” was a regular hunting ground for the 2. Kakashi led the way to the bar by instinct at this point, determined to order something strong to continue their buzz from pre-drinks in their shared apartment. The two downed three shots of something dark and expensive with barely a pause for breath. After they were finished, two bottles of beer were purchased as they turned to scout through the crowd closely, leaning against the bar like they were at home.

Already some regulars recognised them- the women batting their eyes at the two, other men trying to seem like they were close and friendly with them so as to steal some of the female attention. Gojo and Kakashi already knew of, or had already slept with, a few of the women who were trying so hard to capture their attention as “Desire” played through the speakers.

They were put on the end of the list of possibilities. Gojo and Kakashi had agreed early on that they wouldn’t be ‘playing favourites’ with women, on and off relationships weren’t their thing. Kakashi would say its because he wouldn’t want to lead anyone on and build a girls hopes up, Gojo would say that once he’s had his fill, he’d get bored of the same thing again and again. Neither men were sure what they were looking for really when they went out scouting for some fun, and neither had found anyone who held their interest for the long term. But Kakashi was honestly more hopeful than Gojo and his whimsical personality.

As the remix finished its hypnotising beat and “Such a Whore” began, there was a refreshing breeze from the door opening. A group of young women, probably uni students or maybe a little older, came in loudly. They unintentionally drew attention to themselves through their happy laughter and rosy cheeks, clearly already been drinking for a while. And in the middle of the group, they saw HER.

Link to Part 2 here- https://egyptsblackrose.tumblr.com/post/648451271546781696/dancing-with-strangers-ok-heres-part-2-i-guess

[theyreonlynoodlesmike]

How would the guys handle a “girly girl” S/O? Either poly or individual is fine with me. Thanks!

"How would the boys act with a S/O who is a girly girl? Could they handle that?" -anon

I've said this once and I'll say it again!!! I don't think the boys have a type!! So if you're a girly girl?? Totally won't care. Here you go!! (Made this poly btw)

Poly!Lost Boys x Girly Girl S/O

The boys had spotted you on the boardwalk. Pastels, teased hair, manicured nails, and expertly done makeup to match. You were a prim little girly girl, and their complete opposite. For some reason, that only drew them to you

At first, they just wanted to mess with you. "Piss off the princess" as David had some eloquently put. And it was fun. So fun, actually. They flirted with you, of course, but David made sure to play with your hair, putting a strand out of place. He stroked your cheek, his gaze making you flustered as you tried your best to keep up with them. You could've sworn a second ago you had been surrounded by your friends, but they were nowhere to be found now. Marko had leaned in close, a wide smile on his face as he asked what perfume you used and blatantly took a whiff. You had squirmed at his closeness, and tried to give him a reply. He'd hummed, telling you that he liked it with a grin that made the compliment seem far too suggestive (even if it wasn't). Paul took your distraction as an opportunity to play with the edge of your skirt. You yelped and bat his hands away, but he was already leaning down. He whispered in your ear, "Nice heels. Though, I'm surprised your feet don't hurt. Maybe you wanna spend some time off them?" He flirted. Dwayne was the only one that didn't tease you as ruthlessly as the others, and he caught you before the blonde terror twins could make you trip backwards. You had pressed your back right up against his chest, and quickly looked up to see the handsome brunette. It was all a little much for you, the onslaught of teasing and flirting, and you had flushed bright red. Dwayne rubbed his knuckle against your cheek, quietly asking, "What's wrong, princess?" And that had been the final straw. You had broken away from the four, stomping off as you cursed the boys and their antics. They had jeered, calling for you and asking you to come back

They bothered you every night after that, and eventually they weren't such an unwelcome sight. Really...they could be quite charming when they wanted to be. Despite the warnings you'd recieved about "boys like them", you ended up dating them. All four of them.

Marko low-key likes that you're extremely girly. It makes him look more tough whenever you stand besides him, and he's definitely willing to fight anyone who bothers you. Marko would interlock his arm with yours, and ask you questions about the things you liked (even if they were things he had no interest in). He would even talk to you about makeup and fashion, and just saw your style as your own personal self-expression. He liked to hang out in your room and play with all the stuff you had on your walls. He's not big on wearing makeup himself, but he likes to watch you put it on. He'll hover just a little bit out of the sight of the mirror, tilting his head to the side as you focus on applying your eyeshadow and eyeliner. He likes to watch you make yourself "look pretty" and will argue that, "You're always pretty". He always smiles when you ask him what color you should use, and he grins a little bit more at the boardwalk that night. Will watch "girly" movies and shows with you, and actually likes some of them. Will even listen to some "girly" music with you. Likes to listen to gossip, and totally knows all the names of your friends. Is one of the only boys that can tolerate your friends. Will still tease you from time to time about how girly you are, but he never means it in a bad way. Was totally ko-ed that one time you were chewing bubblegum and blew a bubble while talking to him. Won't explain why, but he just thinks it was really hot. The two of you went into an alleyway, and he was the one chewing gum when you left.

Paul had been completely devastated when he heard that your favorite singers were Cyndi Lauper and Madonna, and had tried to convince you to come back to the cave with them just so he could show you some "real music". You had denied, as you were hesitant about getting on one of their death machines. Especially Paul's. The first time he had you listen to metal, you had just said, "this sounds very angry" and you swore that Paul looked like he was about to cry. Literally conditions you to like it, but will mostly put on soft rock/ballads as a "compromise". He listens to some of your music as well, and one time you caught him humming "Physical" by Olivia Newton John afterwards. He's the most willing to let you put some make-up on him, but only something that "rockstars" would wear. You end up finding out that Paul looks really good with some eyeliner. Let's you paint his nails, but the boy can barely sit still long enough for you to do one coat. And trying to wait for it to dry? Forget it. He even likes the painted nails, but, again, he cannot sit still. Paul loves the fact that you mostly wear skirts. Whistles every time he sees you, and is definitely the type to try to sneak his hands under your skirt to try to cop a feel. If you sit on his lap, his hand is going straight to your legs. You gotta hold them so he won't try anything. Likes to pick out your outfits, even if he usually aims to make it as skimpy as possible and most of his choices get vetoed.

Dwayne is the nicest to you, and he treats you like a little princess. He always tells you that you look pretty, and would let you talk about whatever you wanted. He just likes hearing you talk, even if he has no idea what you're saying. Listens to you talk so much that he starts to pick up some of your slang. In his deep voice, he just says, "That was totally bogus". Type to hold open doors for you and treat you like a lady, even if the others make fun of him for it. He's your giant bodyguard, and he basically makes sure no one tries to take advantage of you based on how non-intimidating you look. The type to buy steal you whatever you want, and may spoil you a bit. If you like a certain piece of jewelry, he's giving you it the next night. He was the one that helped you pick out your earrings when you and them decided to become more official. Let's you braid and brush his hair, but he never wears it out of the cave. If you wear sneakers one night, he'll tie your shoelaces for you so you don't have to bend down in your skirt. Low-key has a kink for when you put on lip-gloss. He just likes watching you apply it, and will pull you into a kiss as soon as your done. It's one of the rare instances where he'll do PDA, so you let it slide that when he pulls back and half of your lip gloss is on his lips instead. He just comments, "Bubblegum." And acts like nothing happened. You mostly want to ride with him because he's the safest, and he always helps you on/off of his bike

David could be a perfect gentleman at times, when he wasn't being an ass. He teases you the most out of all the boys. He likes how feminine you are, mainly because it makes him feel more manly and tough. His all black coat and punk/metal look really constrasts with your feminine style, and he loves watching how beach go-ers immediately back down when you tell them that he's your boyfriend. Yeah, they weren't expecting that. He enjoys pushing your boundaries and testing your knowledge on things outside the mainstream. He will even suggest books and movies to you, but it wasn't until you started dating that he actually got you to listen to him. This was mainly by literally giving you his copies or watching them with you at the cave. You two mainly have conversations about those things, or about the things going on in your life. He's really not the type to be interested in girly things, so rip- Loves and almost insists on having you ride with him, mainly because he loves the way you have to hike up your skirt and how tightly you grip onto him. Definitely teases you by calling you "little girl" along with his usual "kitten" and "sweetheart". Likes that you're a girly girl a little bit too much, especially the fact that you get your nails done. You scratched your nails down his back one (1) time in bed, and he had to keep himself from vamping out and biting you in retaliation. Likes to joke about how he and the boys are "corrupting" you, but secretly thinks it's kind of hot

The boys all call you "barbie" and it's a running joke in your relationship. If you ever start to annoy them, they'll say, "Okay, Barbie"

One of the boys favorite things is picking you up from the mall or the boardwalk when you're with all your friends. They live for the looks your friends give them, whether they're judging your choices or giggling at how cute they are. One of your friends comments about you not possibly being able to date all of them long term, and the boys roll their eyes. David just replies, "Long term is exactly what we had in mind", and ends up telling you about their vampirism soon after. It was a bit of a shock, but after some time to adjust they were able to convince you it wasn't as bad as you thought. But they knew convincing you to change would be a whole other battle...

Overall, none of the boys really mind that you're girly, but they'll definitely tease you for it

[a-quiet-borderline-diary]

Sex related rant incoming (I don't write about the subject much, so if that makes u uncomfortable compared to my normal diary content skip this post) :

I honestly don't find myself sexually attracted to other people very often. It's not as if I'm asexual, though. I would say I have been sexually attracted to maybe "handfuls" of people in my life. Usually, I become sexually attracted to someone if I fall in love with them. There are few times that I have felt sexual energy with another person (that wasn't one sided on their end), and when this happens sometimes I begin to idealize the person. I create an image of them that makes them appear important, just because I'm sexually attracted to them. In my head, if it is possible for me to find them sexually attractive, it must mean that person is special.

Sometimes I feel like the low occurance I have of sexual feelings towards other people is because I'm too shallow somehow. When it comes to porn, I exclusively look at hentai (anime porn). I am pretty picky about what hentai I want to look at. I prioritize the looks of the women in hentai. When it comes to men, I prefer hentai with a regular looking protagonist. Usually a young man, but 18+. I don't really care what the man/men look like for the most part, but I don't like "ugly bastard" types. I don't like hentai that gets too rapey. I DO enjoy seduction, though. I don't mind seeing both male and female characters be charmed by someone, but I don't want to see anything forced. I strongly favor a specific body type in women in hentai. I like to see women with well-endowed hourglass figures with more preference for the tits being large than the ass. Ass can be whatever size, but I am only really interested in seeing unrealistically large boobs. I myself got implants in the largest size I could fit because I thought that look was so attractive. Even though I like boobs large, I still don't really want to look at hentai that has comically outrageous proportions. I like hentai, but I'm not really into "silly" cartoon art styles. I like the milf stereotype, so I'm into women with a mature demeanor. They don't always have to be older, but obviously at least 18. I'm more likely to look at hentai with mother aged women in it than 18 year old women though. Overall I think most hentai I look at is pretty vanilla but I like group stuff with all genders and sexualities, public sex stuff, and sometimes I do look at fantasy with monsters. I only really look at fantasy hentai that uses humanoid or nonexistent creatures, I am not interested in shit with animals. I like hentai in manga format, but for videos I usually look at cgi or partially cgi 2d stuff. I'm picky about art style. I sometimes take a long time looking for a decent video to watch because I am looking for pretty much 1 specific body type on the woman and I also only watch when the animation quality is pretty high. I like hentai game gallery animations, but I don't really bother with eroge games that have no motion in the sex scenes. My biggest kink is adult breastfeeding, especially group sex where there are a lot of scenes with both of the woman's nipples being sucked. I think I masturbate to hentai maybe 5 times a week tops and usually my husband and I have sex once or twice a week.

That pretty sums up my taste in porn, but I do not have all the same interests for real sex. I would never fuck a monster lmao. Looking at hentai characters drink breast milk is hot, but I would never drink human breast milk in real life. I do have a kink in real life for breast sucking, though. I also like group sex in real life, but I don't often have sexual feelings for multiple people at once. And even then, I can't always see things working in a group with those people. I am poly, but right now only have one partner and that's my husband. I don't even have any friends I would feel comfortable asking to just play around together and have them suck my tits. I feel like I might enjoy that, but I don't feel the attraction or sense of intimacy to ask for that from anyone I currently know. I also sort of avoid getting casual about sex with people very often because I don't want to risk stds.

The people I am sexually attracted to in real life do not usually look like the women I look at in hentai. I do not see much of a pattern in the body types of men or women I date. I generally don't date people who are considerably obese, but I don't care if someone is overweight. Most people I have dated were in average shape, average weight. I am overweight myself, but I am built with a pretty flattering shape. Most people I have dated look pretty similar to me in how they evenly carry weight. I have liked pixie skinny people, and my husband has more like a bear body. I have had exes with mom bods, which is basically what I have now. With the boobs, I don't care about the size on other women. I like both "boyish" women and super feminine women. I can pretty much say the same for men. In hentai I do like twink-like men, but in real life I am just as likely to like a thin man as I am a thick one. Usually it seems my sexual attraction centers around how I connect to a person emotionally or through personality so I guess I don't prioritize physical qualities that much in real life sexual partners.

Maybe watching hentai has made me only be able to feel initial sexual attraction to fantasy...maybe I was always this way. Idk. I honestly feel like people find out what kind of porn I watch though and assume I reject them because I am shallow. If you look at most people I have dated in the past I don't think that is what shows tho. Oh well just high horny ranting owo