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wandsandwheezes · 4 years ago

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Fake It | Weasley Twins | CH5

one // two // three // four

Warnings | 18+ SMUT, mature themes, fake relationships, secret relationships, love, sex, drama, angst, fluff, cheating, mentions of the war, desc. of torture, pain, drinking, aftercare.

Summary // Fred Weasley has been set up to publicly date Y/N, London’s best Quidditch Seeker in order to drum up some publicity. Y/N however has a different ginger man on her mind; George Weasley.

A/N // flashbacks in italics - Hopefully this chapter gives an insight into why George is so protective over his girl, but also why Y/N is the way she is around him.

There were two times you'd reserved yourself the ability to let loose and have a break, The first was after a big Game, where being absolutely hungover wasn't a problem the next day, or after a big product launch. Fred and George were two men who liked to party hard. Fred loved getting smashed among friends, participating in drinking games and nearly causing a full on riot - a drink to get drunk kind of man. George on the other hand, took a lot to get drunk, he would be waved most of the night and then sober by the time he was home, The one thing however about your boyfriend was that he got handsy and possessive, something that drove you absolutely crazy for him.

You'd been clubbing in muggle London with George multiple times, using the night as a distraction from the wizarding word, taking a cab home to either his place or yours - more often than not passing out cuddling each other in impossible positions. It was the best rest George got, he was always confused when he woke up to the sunrise or birds chirping, finding relief in him sleeping through the night.

George's poor sleeping habits were there before the war, however the looming death and the horrible events he suffered seemed to replay in his mind whenever he neared a state of rest.

The blast in front of him was unlike anything George had seen before with his own two eyes. Through the rubble and dust he saw you hunched over on the ground, coughing up the debris from your lungs. He was silently thanking whatever god that was out there, if there even was one, that he was here in this moment. He knelt down next to you, hand rubbing circles on your back soothingly.

“Baby, it’s ok, I’m here.” When you heard his voice you flung yourself into his arms, not caring about the state of your lungs as you held him. He was safe.

“Let’s get you to the great hall, you can’t be running around out here like this.” You shook your head, cupping his cheeks with your hands and pressing a firm kiss to his lips, like it could be the last time you’d ever kiss him. You both ignored the metallic taste of blood and dust coating one another as you committed this moment to memory, If people caught you here, in each other’s arms, why would It matter? Secrecy was the last thought on your mind as you pressed your forehead against his.

“I need to fight, we need to fight, George.” You were standing up, still holding onto him, you were vulnerable like this, you kissed him once more, he pressed a kiss to your knuckles, “Forever, I promise.” you smiled, pulling him in for another hug. “I love you.” he squeezed you tighter as a response. Before you knew it you were bending down to collect your fallen wand, running off in opposite directions.

You were being backed into a corner, slowly but surely. You’d resolved that this was the end. You weren’t sure who you were fighting until they were too close for comfort. Maria Bishop. When her hand touched your arm you were whisked away to another location. Once there you were violently shoved to your knees, winded still by the apparition.

“I always valued the Y/L/N family, you know,” She started, wand pointed at your head, Maria was known by others as ‘The Bishop’ you assumed because she was one of the Dark Lord’s prominent agents, finding and killing muggle-borns and blood-traitors alike, much like the bishop in chess eliminates their enemy.

“Such a shame you’re not like your mother and father, you would have made a beautiful pureblood wife.” she was laughing as she squatted down in front of you.

“Where Is Harry Potter?” she asked bitterly. Every inch of your skin was shaking with fear, you had no information, but it’s not like that mattered. “I- I don’t know, none of us have seen him in months.”

She didn’t like that, you didn’t even have time to think or apologise before you heard the word ‘crucio’ fall from her lips with ease.

The excruciating pain ran through your body, you fell to the ground, writhing as a blood-curdling scream was ripped through your vocal chords. You couldn’t do anything but scream over and over, it felt like your skin was being torn from its muscle and like scraping across all of your bones. She kept demanding, over and over for you to give her information but there was nothing to let out. You couldn’t even picture what Harry looked like, the only thing that ran through your mind was relentless agony.

You knew you wanted this to be over the minute it started, the pain crept up from your toes to your hips, over your chest and arms until finally it was at your throat. You felt like you were choking, you wanted all of the air to escape your lungs in the hope that the pain would end, but it never did. With every scream she laughed at you, watching as you writhed in pain like it was a comedy, she tried to overpower your shrieks with laughter.

You suddenly felt all weight lift off of you as the curse faded. Every limb was weak, time was no longer a concept to you, it felt like a lifetime of agony only repressed by a moment of solace, your hand was on your wand and before you could think, you were raising it and muttering the incantation of what you knew you shouldn’t. Her eyes widened, a flash of blinding green light filling her eyes, accompanied by a rushing sound, as if an invisible something was whipping through the air - within an instant she rolled over onto her back, unmistakably dead. The Bishop was down.

By 11:30 you were already half gone, If anyone asked, you were most definitely sober, but if the way you were swaying as you stood or your slightly misplaced steps weren’t telling enough, your tipsy giggles sure were. You’d been drinking down gigglewater like there was no tomorrow, making sure that you were well and truly off your face drunk. It felt like most, If not all of Diagon alleys’ daytime bustle had moved into the underground club below Olivanders. The walls were a dark, dusky brown, a perfect backdrop for the flashing lights and strobes. Music was pumping through your veins with every step as you pushed through the sea of people with a drink in hand, you found the corridor, taking a moment to breathe as you sipped on the bitter liquid.

Moments later you found yourself trapped between a pair of strong arms and the thick cushioned wall, you hadn’t even second guessed the man whose lips were on yours. Your hands were in his hair, pulling him in for a desperate, needy kiss. He was humming against you as his thigh found its way between your legs, letting you grind down against it. The man’s tongue was grazing against your lip, begging for entry - you didn’t even think of rejecting it because the touch felt so familiar. For four, maybe five minutes you were standing making out. You had to admit it felt good, of course it felt good, it was George. You pulled away, gasping for air but also getting a minute to look into his eyes, almost immediately you feel a loss of contact, as the body pressed against yours was stripped from by your side, causing a gentle whine to fall from your lips.

It was only when you blinked a few times that the fogginess of your vision truly got to you as you thought you were seeing double. You continued blinking, hoping the two would form to one, but instead you had stumbled backwards, now leaning on the wall for support.

George had Fred by the back of his shirt, pulling him away from you, his eyes like daggers as he scowled at his brother. “You can’t use her like that when she’s drunk.” Fred scoffs, the back of his hand coming up to wipe away the saliva that coated his lips, the smirk however was undeterred by the action. “You better wipe that fucking smirk off your face, Fred.”

The older twin was rolling his eyes, attempting to push past George to finish what he started, however, George’s hand pushed against his brother’s chest pinning him to the wall. “What the fuck?” he exclaimed, shoving George away from him by both shoulders, “Fred, take one look at her, and tell me you're comfortable doing that to her… Merlin, she can hardly stand, don’t be that guy.”

George was pleading his brother at this point, Fred sighed as he eyed you, taking in every characteristic of your demeanour - you were half asleep, leaning against the wall. He watched you try to wake yourself up and push your body away from the wall only to come crashing right back against it.

“I don’t know why you’re acting so protective all of a sudden… I’ll take her home.” Fred sighed, his hands rubbing over his face in an attempt to sober himself up.

“Fred, wait- I’ll do it.” his twin cocked an eyebrow at him, “I’m sober, it’s fine, you can’t apperate her she’ll be throwing up everywhere.” Fred nodded, giving George a pat on the shoulder as he walked away, “Thanks, Georgie.”

Your boyfriend's once angry eyes were softening as he looked at you, full of sadness as he watched you struggle. All he wanted to do was wrap you in his arms, and protect you, muttering under his breath, as he walked over to you, ‘let’s get you home then, angel.’

“Y/N, my love, it’s George, I’m gonna take you home, alright?” George was speaking so softly that you immediately felt at home. You nodded quickly, falling into the familiar pair of arms that were now holding you, giving you the anchor to finally walk again.

George led you out of the club and walked slowly with you as you stumbled step by step all the way down the quiet diagon alley. He got you into a cab as you both stumbled out of the leaky cauldron, the horns and chatter of London beaming around, it truly was a city that never slept. He had his arm wrapped around you protectively as you cuddled into his side, the sound of his beating heart slowly brought your racing thoughts down to earth. The way you were curled up against him reminded him of a moment from the war he’d never forget.

Your fingers trembled and shook so much that you could no longer control the grip of your wand. It truly sunk in that what you had done was unforgivable. You’d taken someone’s life. You rationalised with yourself that you had done it for your own good, to protect others, the ones you loved and cared for, but more importantly to protect yourself. You quickly pushed away from the body, crawling backwards until your back hit the wall, it had finally sunk in exactly what you'd done and you couldn't even bear to be with yourself as you buried your head between your knees, as silent sobs choked from your lips.

George found you like this, he had been searching worriedly for hours. It was pure vulnerability, he saw the body of the Bishop lying on her back, your wand discarded and you huddled into a ball. He didn’t know what to do or how to protect you, he reached out to touch your arm but you recoiled at his touch, pulling your knees tighter to your chest.

“Baby, It’s me.” he murmured softly, his voice cracking as he pushed out a whisper, outstretching his hand for you to take when you were ready. “We need to move you, It’s not safe here.” You took his hand, letting him whisk you away to a safer place, but you knew in your heart there was nowhere safer but his arms.

George carried you up the stairs to the bedroom, sitting you down on the bed, kneeling on the floor as he unlaced your boots, pulling each one off gently as his hand massaged your foot. When he looked up at you, you were no longer sat upright, instead having fallen back against the sheets as you began to try and remove your own clothes, doing so in a piss poor way.

He shook his head, smiling to himself as you grumbled at your own misfortune, his hands gripped your arms, pulling your wrists to his lips, pressing a gentle and loving kiss to the inside of each one. He slowly and cautiously helped you in removing your clothing, making sure to grab an old tee of his to cover you with when you sat naked on his bed.

He left to go and grab you a glass of water, as well as some painkillers for the morning. Finding you curled up on top of the sheets while shivering from the cold chill of the room. He chuckled once again, popping the items on the bedside table so that he could sit you up.

"Can we drink some water please, Princess?" you furrowed your brows, looking up at him as he stood in front of you. His large, warm hand was cupping your cheek softly, as he used his other to retrieve the glass of water, "I'll help you, now open up for me, that's a good girl."

His thumb coaxed your lips open, pressing the cold glass against your bottom lip as he gently fed you the clear liquid, you were gulping it down like you were wholeheartedly parched, he smiled at you when you'd finished, placing the glass on the bedside table again.

"Well done, beautiful, now let's get you under these covers, that ought to stop those shivers, hm?" Your hands wrapped around his neck as he lifted you up off of the bed, you stood, holding onto him as he flipped the duvet corners open, lifting you up so he could lay you down against the mattress.

He tried to pull your arms from his neck, but you only held on tighter, keeping him pulled close to you as a pout hung on your lips, whining as he tried to pull away from you. "Cuddle me."

He leaned down pressing a kiss to your forehead, he tucked you in gently, the covers wrapping you up nice and warm. "I'll be joining you soon darling but I can't cuddle you like this, I'll crush you if i lay on top of you now," he laughed, the low hum reverberating in your chest as you smiled at him with a doe eyed expression plastered to your face.

He stripped his jacked off, changing into some more comfortable clothing so that he could join you in bed. As soon as he sat on the mattress, your head was in his lap, he smiled at the sight, his heart warming as your arms wrapped around his thigh, cuddling into him.

He felt your shoulders begin to shake, looking down at you he saw the salty tears running down your cheeks as you tried to hold back your sobs. The reality of what happened in the hall of the club was hitting you, suddenly feeling sick to your stomach at the prospect that you had been making out with his twin, all the while believing it was George. "I'm so sorry, Georgie, I don't deserve you, I fucked up and I'm sorry, I just- I thought he was you and I was kissing him back and-"

George had cut you off by pressing a finger to your lips with a gentle shushing sound, his fingertips massaging your scalp as he played with your hair ."You don't need to apologise for a thing, Princess."

The feeling of his hand as he gently dragged his fingers through your hair was lulling you to sleep, you sighed contently, your heart beating faster as you began to hear the gentle soothing sounds of his humming, a sweet and soothing melody that made you feel like you were in heaven.

To him you looked like an angel when you slept, his heart resting easy at the sight of you painless, careless and content in the arms and presence of the man she loved so dear. She was like his own little slice of heaven, for him to enjoy on earth, always feeling like the damned luckiest man in the world to wake up to the sight of you.

You awoke the next morning to the smell of bacon and eggs hitting your senses, groaning you reached over and took the two pain relief, washing it down with some water from the night before. You were dragging your feet along the floor as you sought the arms of your boyfriend, you found him in the kitchen plating up some food. You immediately fell to his side, arms wrapping around him as you groaned, the power of your headache hitting you.

"Eat up, my Love, You'll feel so much better after." George had prepared you a delicious greasy fry up, knowing it was one of your favourite things to wake up to, he pressed a kiss to your cheek as his hand found the small of your back, "Thank you George, smells amazing as always."

He smiled, taking the two plates to the dining table, where cutlery and orange juice already lay. You felt spoilt by the man you loved as you wolfed down the food. George made the best breakfasts around, aside from Molly, of course, each component cooked with the special ingredient of never-ending love, making it that much more tasty.

You were the luckiest girl alive, looking into his eyes, he smiled at you, making you melt, even after all these years. George was everything you needed and more, you were sick of hiding him and he was just as sick of hiding you. Your Protector, Your Lover, His angel.

>>>>> Chapter Six

taglist // @starlightweasley @slytherinsunrise @gcdric @theweasleysredhair @whiz-bangs78 @weasleysflowr @vogueweasley @minty-malfoy @vivianweasley @feetoffthetablee @thisismynerdyself @rip-us @witch-and-a-half @sarcasticallywitty15 @pandaxnienke @loony-loopy-lupinn @pigwidgexn@mrmoonyy @mackaywhore @softlyqoos @colorfulprofessornickelangel @fandomscombine @satellitespidey @txtdreamss @aaannabbanana @starkidpotty @mollydarling-hphm @amwithers2001

#Fake It Fic #george weasley x reader #george weasley fic #George Weasley #george weasley fluff #george weasley smut #fred and george #fred weasley #fred weasley fic #fred weasley fluff #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley smut #weasley twins #harry potter #harry potter fic #harry potter smut #harry potter writing #ginger hair

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jonspurpleskirt · 3 years ago

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Sharing Comfort

A/N: This is for @archivalpride. Prompt was “Sharing Clothes” and “Pre-Canon” so I wrote a fluffy piece to celebrate the quiet moments of trust. 1.7k in word length. No warnings apply.

___

Jon did not make friends fast. Most people he found to be too intimidating, boring or exhausting and not many knew what to do with his sudden info dumps and sharp comments that shot out of his mouth seemingly at random.

He'd been alone in Research for a long while because of it and happily so. Things had changed when Tim had joined the Institute, though. Tim had come into the library and sat down opposite Jon with a thunder cloud hanging over his head and pain in his dark eyes. He'd been quiet and snappy in a fake cheerful way that screamed undealt trauma. At least to Jon, who seemed to be the only one to feel the vibes of "Leave me alone" and "I'm grieving" that Tim gave off in a constant stream.

Having Tim as his desk partner was an intense experience despite the way they only ever nodded to each other in greeting at first. But it was also intriguing. A mystery. Jon loved mysteries.

The instances he had ever willingly initiated a conversation with a stranger could be counted on one hand. Which marked the day he tapped Tims shoulder - after roughly two months of co-habiting - to tactfully ask him what he was groaning about as a very special day indeed. They steamrolled into friendship from there, both personalities clashing in the best ways possible.

Jon pulled Tim into nerve wracking research expeditions, Tim flirted them out of being arrested a few times, they went out for drinks and karaoke and movies and stayed late nights to crack nutty cases of supernatural bullshit together.

This went on for months. A nice, comfortable new routine. Jon wasn't alone anymore. And Tim broke out of whatever had pulled him down so much, becoming more cheerful and flirty by the day. Which didn't matter to Jon because Tim would always come to him the most, would always seek out to partner up with Jon and would defend his prickly personality to his dying breath.

And then Sasha joined them. She came from Artefact Storage, which made her a prime target for every curious researcher in a five mile radius. Tim and Jon included. Alright maybe they were the worst of the bunch.

Although Jon only thought of himself as a partner in crime in this one. He had been dragged along by Tim, after all. Sure in the end he had been the one to ask the most questions, but that wouldn't have been the case if he had just been left alone to be antisocial in front of his laptop.

Sasha and Tim, much to Jons chargin, hit it off within the first few seconds. And ever since then their cozy two-someness had turned into a group effort. With specially leverage put on the word "effort".

"Morning Jon!"

Jon let out a deep, rumbly hum, voice not up to the task of supporting words this late in the- He glanced at the little clock at the bottom of his screen. Ah... early in the morning.

With a laugh that was far too cheerful however you would describe the current hour, Sasha sat down next to him. She leaned in to look at what he was working. He leaned away to get her out of his personal bubble.

Her legs brushed his and the rustling drew his gaze downward. She wore a thick wool skirt, long enough not to go against the dress code. It was a somewhat dull navy blue and fell down in enticing waves around her crossed legs.

It looked very soft and comfortable. Jon itched to touch it. Instead he rubbed against the stiff fabric of his own cream coloured dress pants.

"Would you mind?" He snapped at her.

"No. You spelled 'aboriginal' wrong."

"Thank you for your insight. Don't you have anywhere else to be?"

"Don't you?" She shot back, light and quick as though they were just bantering and not fighting over the right to sit at this table.

Sasha huffed at his glare and slid a cup of something steaming over to him. "You keep staying so late that I can buy you a drink at the asscrack of dawn and be sure you're still here to consume it hot. I'm not usually one to judge anyone's sleep schedule. But I'm judging your sleep schedule."

"And yours is any better?" Jon muttered, taking the offering and peeking inside. Black tea with a bit of cream and hopefully enough sugar to rot his teeth out of his mouth. He needed both the coffein and the sweet energy source.

"I'm getting at least two more hours of sleep than you do on a daily basis, so I'm good."

"Tim would have both of our heads if he knew."

Sasha put her hand on the table and stretched out her pinky. "I swear secrecy if you do."

With a snort Jon linked their pinkies. "I'll hold you to that."

So... Maybe Sasha wasn't that bad. She was a little aggressive in her befriending techniques, Jon mused. At least he hoped the early morning chats and cups of tea and coffee were that and not an elaborate plan to get rid of him via slow poisoning. But she was about as curious as Tim and Jon and her skills with computers were very happily exploited by the both of them. So Jon eventually had to admit that she was actually a very nice addition to the group.

Not that he could have ever said no to their friendship. Tim and Sasha put together were a maelstorm of affection, sucking Jon in with a force he had no chance to defend against. And before he knew it they had successfully gotten him accostumed to friday nights at the pub and saturday mornings in their flats, smashed together on a couch or a bed or a mattress depending on who had had the misfortune of playing host that week.

Jon hadn't been this comfortable since Georgie. And that wasn't only the booze talking. It was one of those nights where they ended up leaving the pub early to lounge around Sashas massive sofa instead. Jons head was swimming within a blissful haze of tipsiness.

He was slouching over one end of the couch, head tilted just so that he could watch his two friends bicker. The words didn't really register, but the noise was nice and their expressions were funny.

Without his conscious saying so, his gaze slid down to Sashas leg area. She wore a very eye catching, fluttery red skirt this time around and the way the warm glow of the ceiling lamp was reflected in the material was mesmerizing.

"Oh Jonny boy, don't you know staring like that is rude?" Tim half-joked as he noticed.

Sasha slapped him on the shoulder. "Shush you there's like zero sexual longing in his gaze, Tim. You don't need to go all protective big brother on me. He just really likes my skirts."

"They look comfy." Jon muttered, sinking deeper into the couch.

"Awww. Jon. Jon my love. My friend. My buddy." Tim scooted over to him, nearly face planting on the floor in his eagerness to slide into Jons side. "Is this jealousy I hear?"

"No. Did you just degrade me from lover to lowest friendship tier?"

"Oh I beg to differ." Tim sang, ignoring the question and making Jon scowl harder.

An arm got thrown over his shoulder and Jon was tugged into Tims side, relaxing into the tight hold against his will.

"You know if you didn't make it a sport to buy the most uncomfortable clothing ever, you wouldn't need to glare at Sashas fashion choices all the time. Making other people think things about your intensions."

"Fuck other people."

Jon waited until the surprised laughter of his two friends ebbed down to speak again. "I wanna be comfortable too..."

"Say no more. Sasha to the rescue."

Tim and Jon both whined as she hopped off and darted away into her bedroom. She hadn't been part of the cuddle pile, but her presence was still dearly missed. Thankfully not for long because a few minutes later she reappeared with a long, purple skirt.

"Here you go mister. Go on try it on."

Trading places with her Jon didn't hesitate to shug his trousers off and slip the skirt on. Tim wolf whistled behind him and Jon dutifully showed him a finger. The yelp he heard shortly after told him that Sasha must have taken more direct approach to disciplining Tim.

"Bad boy. I picked that colour for a reason."

Jon flushed at the reminder that Tim and Sasha knew. That they knew and accepted him and even went out of their way to make him comfortable.

"I may not be allowed to touch, but I can still appreciate beauty when I see it."

"Do you need glasses, Tim?" Jon couldn't help but ask while he settled back down.

It was his turn to be slapped on the shoulder. "Nu-uh! No self depricating jokes in my household!"

"Yes ma'am." He scooted over to Sashas side, marveling at the slide of the soft material against his legs. "Anyway. Touching yes. But no sex, only cuddles."

Sasha laughed in delight as she pulled him closer so he could stretch out, the two of them nearly shoving Tim off the couch.

"Wait, wait, wait Jon you're definitely not comfortable yet!"

"Hm?" He frowned at the renewed shifting, jeez everyone was being so squirmy today.

"Dress shirt? Really? Wait a sec."

Tim ended up finding a truly attrocious night shirt he had stored in one of Sashas cupboards. It was rainbow coloured, but at least it was made of a soft cotton and about a size too big on Jon.

"Awww Jon you're adorable!"

"Timothy Stoker don't you dare take a photo."

"Fine, fine. But I will remember this day forever."

It turned out that he didn't need to. The next time they were over at Sashas Jon asked to borrow their clothes again and the next time after, and the next time after that, too. It kind of escalated from there, clothes mixed together until it was hard to remember who owned what.

And that was perfect. Because the most comfortable clothes were always the ones that belonged to his friends.

#tma #archivalpride #my writing #jontimsasha #jonathan sims #tim stoker #sasha james #week one #prompt: sharing clothes #hope i'm doing this right #can be read as friendship #or platonic polycule #i honestly have no clue where to draw the line #fanfic

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drreidfics · 4 years ago

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Dr. Reid and the Broken Girl pt1.

DR. REID AND THE BROKEN GIRL (Working Title)

Characters : SpencerReid x FemReader

Warnings : Abuse, Hints of Self Harm.

CAUTION // TW // THIS BOOK DEALS WITH MATURE CONTENT SUCH AS PROFESSOR AND STUDENT RELATIONSHIP, SEXUAL ASSULT, SELF HARM, MENTAL ILLNESS AND SUBSTANCE ABUSE. IT ALSO INCLUDES A LOT OF RATED-R MATERIAL. IF THIS IS TRIGGERING OR MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE THEN PLEASE DON’T READ.

Here I am again, on the floor, begging him to stop. There he is again, laughing at my pleas and forcing himself inside of me. Almost every night he climbs into my bed, then in the morning, he pretends everything is normal. When anyone is around, he acts charming. He is able to trick everyone into thinking everything is fine. Well, it's not.

My phone buzzed to life at the side of me. The alarm was going off but I had been up for hours, staring at the flecks of dust dancing around the air. The sunlight streamed in through my thin, white drapes. It was beautiful out. It was the middle of May and bound to be hot out in Arizona. I could feel the warmth on my skin already. I needed to shower and get all this sticky sweat off my skin. It wasn't even mine. I felt disgusting. His touch lingered everywhere on me. The bruises he gave me stained my skin more than the self inflicted cuts.

'Morning Ms. y/l/n. Last night was lovely. See you at lunch?'. It was a text from Mr Reid. He was my psychology professor. Older than me, at thirty, he had long dark hair and deep brown eyes. His hair curled slightly at the end. He was tall and slim. Smart and nerdy, having two degrees and a doctorate, he left his job at the FBI for something less mentally draining. He had worked there since he was twenty-two. I was twenty-one making our age gap quite small. Look at me, trying to convince myself that it even mattered. He was a lovely guy. Friendly, and handsome. He wouldn't fall in love with a student, and if he did, that student would never be me. He was too smart for that.

"Morning Dr. Reid. Thank-you for taking me. It was a fun eve! Yes, see you at lunch. We can have a chat about the stuff we saw yesterday =)". I read the message over and over again before hitting send. I was nervous as I usually always say stupid things. My low self esteem affected me very much. I was twenty-one, already with one degree and going back to do another. I was still living at Sharon's and I haven't had a boyfriend. He texted me back instantly.

"Can't wait! Need a lift to school? =)" I smiled down at my battered iPhone 6. I couldn't afford a brand new phone. I was lucky in that I only had to work a few hours a week at the local book store and that it was something I enjoyed doing. Sharon was good to me. She helped me pay for and make my way through college. I don't know what or where I would be without her. On the other hand, she brought the human spawn of the devil into my life.

"No thnx, Luna is picking me up =)" I sent but then instantly regretted it. I love my best friend but I would have preferred a ride with Dr. Reid. Our conversations were always interesting and insightful. We could talk about a wide range of subjects for hours and it would only feel like minutes passed.

"Ok, see u soon Y/N"

I smiled, almost forgetting my problems before catching glimpse of myself in the mirror. My fragile, battered body stared back. I sighed. He could never find a girl like me attractive. Not that it mattered anyway. Silly little girl crush.

After debating whether it was best to just find the nearest bridge in town and throw my self off or get ready for school (I am very mentally unwell), I decided on the latter. Luna had already texted me to inform me that she was about to set off. Knowing Luna, which I have had the pleasure of knowing for fifteen years (no sarcasm in there), ten minutes would be ten years.

I staggered down the dreaded stairs, almost losing my footing a few times, feeling light headed. I entered the brightly lit kitchen. It was so bright that I could feel an aching behind my eyes. The decor was simplistic, all white with gold features. Classic business mom who is never home asthetic going on.

Sharon sat at the island, face absorbed in her laptop. She was in her late forties with short, mousey hair. I believe she would be referred to as a 'Karen'. She looked nothing like Dom. She was short, like me, and fairly slim. He was tall and muscular with broad shoulders. Quarterback star player with the strength to show for it. He could snap us both in half. Dominic is Sharon's only child. Yes, that is correct. She is not my mum. I lost her.

Sharon looked up at me, flashing me a warm smile, still bashing the keys to her MacBook. She took a sip of her black coffee, nibbling on some cold toast. "You look like shit" she stated; matter of factly, her face blank. '"Thanks?'" I answered with a raised eyebrow. I walked over to the coffee machine and put in a pod, sticking my travel cup underneath. 77Kcals of goodness. All the fuel I will need this morning. "Sweetheart, don't act like that. You know I'm just saying. You need to sleep more" '"I know" I sighed. It was true... "But that makes two of us" I retorted cheekily with a grin. "Oh sweetheart, don't I know it" she raised her cup as if toasting the comment before gulping the last bit of coffee.

Sharon was my guardian, though not anymore as I was an adult and of drinking age. She still cared for me though as if I were her own. My mom died when I was seven and my dad had a breakdown. He couldn't cope. One day I came home from school and he was gone. He didn't say a word to anyone. He packed up his stuff and left me. I hated him for a while. The anger within me burned to my core. After a while I felt sympathy. He didn't get the help that he needed. If he did then we both wouldn't be in this mess. We'd be happy - together. I doubt he would know how to contact me now.

Aunt Sharon took me in. She wasn't really my aunt, she was my mom's best friend. She was the only connection to my mother that I had left besides her wedding ring. She loved her dearly and I believe she loves me dearly too. It's not her fault she can't protect me. She works herself to death trying to help me live my dreams. Dom wasn't the child that she had always wanted. He is doing nothing with his life. That is something I will alway's respect of her, single mom raising her child and somebody else's.

I loved her, though she did have the tendency to dish out tough love which often was way - way too harsh. And she was always away leaving me with him. I knew that if I'd only just tell her what he was capable of... What he would do to me when she left... She'd have murdered him herself with her bare hands. But it would kill her. I couldn't do that to her. He was the only thing she had who was blood. Me, I had no-one.

"shit! Is that the time? I'm going to be late. I gotta go, honey. Say bye to Dom for me." she pleaded as she stuffed the last slice of toast in her mouth and gathered her briefcase and her keys. " ...And make sure you have something to eat. You're wasting away!" "Have a good day at work Shaz" I shouted after her. I doubt that she heard me. She was out the door in seconds, jangling her keys and fighting between speaking with me and the ringtone on her work mobile. I heard her professional, scripted 'Hello, Sharon Cormack speaking' as the door slammed behind her.

I made my way through the spotless kitchen Gina, Sharon's housekeeper, always did a good job. I grabbed a bottle of water out of the integrated refrigerator. I also grabbed my iced latte from the coffee machine. It was almost half eight. My first classes start at nine and Luna still wasn't anywhere in sight. I scrambled through my purse for my phone, ready to give her a piece of my mind. That girl would be late to her own funeral.

"You're up early" a voice from behind me sneered. It took all my might to not to curl up in a ball, trembling.

"I... I have school"

No reply. I felt him creeping up behind me, felt his breath against my neck.

"I can think of something much better to do with the day baby" he whispered as he planted acid kisses on my neck. It burned. I squeezed my eyes shut, putting my hands up defensively. He pushed my back into the counter. A sharp pain ran though me.

"Please stop. I have to go" I whispered as his hand snaked its way up my neck, fist knotting tightly in my hair.

'"Why do you think a whore like you has the right to tell me what to do, hm?"

'- Hello? Katy?' Luna's smooth voice called out in sing song.

Oh, thank god for her and her timing. He released me from his grasp and increased the distance between us. His eyes were clouded. I could tell he was pissed. I brushed passed him, running towards Luna, who was standing by the open door. I ran straight into her arms hugging her tightly.

"I thought you'd never show." I whispered. She rested her chin on my shoulder, stroking my hair. I could tell that she was staring daggers at Dom and I could tell he didn't care. Like I said, the same routine. Every morning.

By the time lunch rolled around I had had enough. had gotten into a lot of trouble with Ms. Hallows over an overdue assignment and I had spilt water all down the front of my jeans. It looked like I had pissed myself. My saving grace is that they were dark jeans and so it wasn't too noticable. That didn't stop Georgie from laughing and calling me pissy pants for half the day.

Georgie was the kind of girl that you would avoid in high school. Everybody wanted to be her but everyone hated her so bad. She had golden brunette locks, a slim face and a petite nose. Her friends Nova and Ari were just as bad. Everyone used to tell you that when you left high school things would be different. I am sorry to inform you that they don't. Bullies stay bullies forever.

I forced my way through the groups of students, crowded together in the corridors. The last thing I wanted was to be late for my chat with Mr. Reid

"Y/N" I heard Luna calling after me. I could tell that she was chasing me through the crowd of students. "Y/N. Look, Y/N stop." I rolled my eyes.

"What?" I snapped. I could see the hurt in her eyes. She leaned on the wall, panting. I sighed. "I'm sorry. What's wrong?" I asked. I felt bad for snapping at her. All she wanted was answers, like anyone would have after walking in on what she did. But I don't give answers. I shut down. I don't tell anyone anything. She tried talking once we got in the car. I ignored her and I ran once we'd arrived at school. She didn't even need to speak. I could just tell what she wanted to talk about from the look on her face. I sighed again.

"Luna, I can't talk about this right now." I saw the hurt in her eyes. If I kept pushing her away then eventually she wouldn't fight to stay. 'Good', a small voice whispered in my head. Maybe that would be for the best. She deserves better. Everyone does. I could just end my life today and nobody would care. I used to fight hard against the suicidal ideations that entered my mind but now I didn't see the point.

"I have my meeting and I can't be late. Taco Bell after classes?" I asked. To my relief, she smiled and nodded, that beautiful smile that I loved so much. She was so easy to please. I smiled and walked away towards room 1980. Dr. Reid's office.

"I love you!" she shouted after me smiling.

"I love you more!"

"Lesbians" Georgie mocked. She was stood near the bathrooms. I rolled my eyes.

"Grow up"

Luna was gay but we weren't together. We had been intimate a few times but nothing had come of it. But so what if it had? We both agreed it felt weird as we had known each other as friends for so long. We didn't want to ruin anything. Luna and I had been friends ever since she opened up my juice box for me in kindergarten and then hit the girl who had stolen my straw. We had been inseparable ever since. She's been with me through thick and thin. I'd hate to think where I'd have been if she hadn't been there when my mom had died. We are and will alway's be the best of friends. In another life I could see us growing old together, adopting puppies and children but sometimes, it doesn't work out. And if you love someone, you have to let them go.

I opened the door to 1980 and as soon as I did my heart fluttered in my chest. There he was, as beautiful as ever. He looked up from the book he was reading, glasses perched on his nose and smiled, he seemed glad to see me.

"Sweetie!" he said, a smile spreading across his gorgeous lips. He's the only person who calls me that.

"Dr. Reid" I smiled back. My smile was huge and I probably looked so dorky but I don't care. My day just got brighter. I pulled up a chair next to him and kicked my feet up onto his lap. He rested his hand on my calf.

"So what did you think to the book?"

#drreid #spencer x reader #spencerreid #spencer reid #criminal minds fluff #spencer reid story #spencer reid smut #criminal minds fic #spencer reid fic #mature #fic #reader x spencer reid #wattpad #wattpad fanfic #teacher x student #college professor smut #professor x student #professor x reader #teacher x reader

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mitchmarnier · 5 years ago

Text

MASTERLIST ☾ updated 05/20/20

▸ patreon | ko-fi ◂

LOSERS LIBRARY FICS

multi chaptered fics

say it right ☾ 7 chapters. complete. 14k.（Eddie and Richie work together in book cafe, and Richie is determined to turn Eddie into a coffee drinker by making him the perfect drink. And if Eddie happens to fall in love with him in the process, well then that’s just an added bonus）

ask me to stay ☾ 7 chapters. complete. 33k.（the year is 1994, and Eddie Kaspbrak is in love）

took too many hits off this memories, i need to come down ☾ 4/? chapters. in progress. 19k（Eddie Kaspbrak doesn’t remember much from his childhood. He doesn’t really know he doesn’t remember. He also doesn’t know why he’s so drawn this terrible comedian on tv, but when Eddie runs into him in a bar, and they spend the night together, Eddie’s life is changed forever. It’s finally back on track- and he doesn’t know anything about it）✕notsfw ✕

the real world ☾ 6/18 chapters. in progress. 17k（after a sudden and unexplained disappearance, richie tozier returns to derry with a secret that no one person could ever hope to hold onto）

make my way back home [when i learn to fly] ☾ 3/10 chapters. in progress. 7k （class scholar richie tozier and school track and field icon eddie kaspbrak rekindle their childhood friendship, loosely based off the art concept by caliceal）

collab fics

burn, crash, romance with @lermanslogan ☾ 1/8 chapters. in progress. 9k（the Fratboy!Eddie fic birthed over Discord that simply had to be brought to life）✕notsfw ✕

gift fics

for diana (lermanslogan) wouldn’t you like to see something strange ☾ 2.8k.（when richie’s mother gets married, he’s forced to move across the country and finds that his new town is not so ordinary at all.）

for diana (lermanslogan) these lines of lightning mean we’re never alone ☾ 15k（when eddie’s mom pulls his fiancial support for school, eddie finds himself with no option but to return back to maine. unless richie can figure out a way to help him.）

for leigh (@s-s-georgie) i want these words to make things right, but it’s the wrongs that make the words come to life ☾ 10k（richie tozier runs an anonymous tip blog for superheros in New York City. sounds like a great idea until you throw in the ex boyfriend superhero he’s still in love with, and the weird blue eyed man who somehow figured out the man behind the blog.）

for amy (eddiefuckinkaspbrak) penny for your thoughts, dollar for your insights (or a fortune for your disaster) ☾ 7k（richie is suddenly forced from his home, his kingdom and his birthright and sent to live in a shithole town in Maine, he doesn’t think he could ever be happy here. he’s quick to learn that there’s more in derry than he’d ever expected.）

one shots

i don’t wanna spend another christmas without you ☾ 5k （fill for ITfandomprompts2019 secret santa）

i want to feel something again. ☾ 4k（meeting a wedding au）✕notsfw ✕

did i say that out loud? ☾ 12k（my piece written for the IT Big Bang 2019, paired with disneyfan567 on tumblr!）

richie tozier’s all dead rock show ☾ 13k（after a near-death experience, Richie Tozier suddenly finds himself with a sparkling, unaffected memory of Derry, the things that happened there and people he once loved）✕notsfw ✕

no you can’t fence time and you can’t stop love. ☾ 3k（how can eighteen years just up and walk away?）

baby, we can make it if we’re heart to heart ☾ 2k（the first time eddie kaspbrak and richie tozier ever talked about running away together, they were six years old and it hadn’t seemed serious.）

IT fandom week 2019

reddie soulmate au

stanpat college au

stozier summer romance au ✕notsfw ✕

i can be your hero ☾ 2k（day seven: accidental confession）

IT fandom exchange 2020

that’s my type ☾ eddie x richie

it takes a village ☾ stan x patty, eddie x richie

song prompts

reddie ✿ 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8,

stanpat ✿ 1, 2, 3,

hanzier ✿ 1, 2,

stozier ✿ 1, 2, 3,

stanlon ✿ 1,

bichie ✿ 1, 2,

streddie ✿ 1, 2,

mcmarsh ✿ 1,

benverly ✿ 1,

prompts

bichie + 1 ☾ i pushed you up against the wall and i can’t stop staring at your lips from stnbroughs

reddie + 45 & 46 ☾ do you trust me? & can i kiss you right now? from anon

reddie + 38 ☾ isn’t this amazing from anon

reddie + 52 & 39 ☾ first one to make a noise loses from anon

reddie + 179 ☾ first one to make a noise loses from anon ✕notsfw ✕

reddie + 16 ☾ cry me a river from anon

reddie + 37 ☾ i had a dream about you

stanlon & reddie + 122 ☾ why do they behave for you from anon

reddie + 100 ☾ i’m sorry but that was adorable from anon

reddie ☾ its okay to cry from anon

reddie + 81 ☾ please don’t hurt me from jwilliambyers

reddie + 10 ☾ high school popular kid and nerd au from ameliadams

reddie + 27 ☾ meeting at a support group from anon

reddie + 22 ☾ two miserable people Meeting at a wedding AU from anon

stozier ☾ exes meeting again after not speaking for years au from tinyarmedtrex

reddie + 48 ☾ meeting again at a high school reunion au from cariebishop

reddie + 48 ☾ I called you at 2am because I need you from richiardtozier

reddie + 9 & 30 ☾ Secret Relationship & Suddenly Getting Flustered Because of a Particular Outfit from clockworkbisexual

reddie + 27 ☾ Help me I’m being hit on at a bar please be my fake boyfriend for a second from appojoos

reddie + 69 ☾ We’re not just friends and you fucking know it.” + kiss at a party from jwilliambyers

reddie ☾ “You make me happy” + “I love you” from anon

reddie + 17 ☾ I would do anything for you. anything from thundercatseddie

reddie + 9 ☾ There’s only one bed and we sleep as far away as possible from each other but wake up cuddling from thundercatseddie

reddie + 3 ☾ road trip au from anellope & richiardtozier

reddie + drunken confession ☾

reddie & stanpat + meeting the parents au ☾

#reddie fic #it fanfction #my writing #:)#ref #reblogs appreicated

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frogzkafka · 4 years ago

Note

Martin Blackwood!!

How I feel about this character: Oh Martin... I love him... I admire characters who are kindhearted but also catty and rude as hell... its the kind of spunk I wish I had more of!!

All the people I ship romantically with this character: I ship him w/ Jon! His relationship with Tim could be interesting too, but probably very frustrating for the both of them? In a fun way!

My non-romantic OTP for this character: I really want Martin to be close with the other archives staff! Martin/Tim/Sasha homies forever please... Maybe also Georgie

My unpopular opinion about this character: Uh... hmm... Well idk if this is actually unpopular... I think that maybe it would be interesting to get more insight into his more ignorant side and how he feels about it? Especially relative to Jon? I feel like I can sense there’s a lot there to examine! It’s more interesting if it’s complicated... OH also my favorite bad song opinion for S4 Martin is Ringtone by 100 Gecs. It is 100 Gecs, but is our sweet man not a self-isolating mess in s4?

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: Wish he wouldn’t suffer more loss!! Ugh. With the latest episode I feel like I can see more plot-development branching that could really suck for him and Jon... I really don’t want them to harm each other but if they do... I reallllly hope its worth it - emotional payoff, story and theme-wise. I don’t want him to go back to being alone. I’d say what’s the point of that after his previous character arc and also just... ouch

My OTP: JonMartin!!

My OT3: Don’t really have one but I think JonMarTim is the most interesting

#williammatagot #asks #thank you!!

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tweetsongs · 5 years ago

Note

Gosh, you have such a colourful collection of otp tags. Is there a masterlist?

⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ ‘colorful collection’ is such a nice way of putting it, rather than something like ‘oh god what are these tags, why can’t you ship-tag like a normal human.’

honestly i never thought people would look at my blog enough that the ship tags would become an issue (feel free to hmu if u want me to also use more conventional tags for easy blacklisting/searching/etc, i can go back and add those in), but here’s a list of all the otp tags that i remember having for easy access (behind the cut because,,,,,i underestimated how many of these i have OTL). i’ll come back to edit some in if i realize i’ve missed any:

podcasts

- otp: i need him to be okay (jonmartin, tma)

- otp: arrangements (melanie/georgie, tma)

- otp: alice (daisy/basira, tma)

- otp: i’m already kissing him (taako/kravitz, taz: balance)

- otp: time enough to fall deeply and truly in love (lup/barry bluejeans, taz: balance)

- otp: sweet flips (carey/killian, taz: balance)

- otp: tree lesbians (hurley/sloane, taz: balance)

- vampfire (dani/aubrey, taz: amnesty)

- otp: fuck destiny (wren/shan, spines)

- otp: strange, but not strangers (mabel/anna, mabel)

movies/marvel franchise

- otp: r + e (richie/eddie, it (stephen king))

- otp: avocados at law (matt/foggy, daredevil)

- otp: you gave me a home (steve/tony, marvel)

anime/manga

- otp: a world without haruka is hardly worth saving (haruka/michiru, sailor moon)

- otp: partners in law (miles/phoenix, ace attorney)

- otp: watch my match (soma/takumi, shokugeki no soma)

- ot3: elite gays (takumi/soma/megumi, shokugeki no soma)

- otp: i’m erina-sama’s friend (erina/hisako, shokugeki no soma)

- otp: us against the world (michaela/clarith, evillious chronicles)

- otp: don’t be afraid of this world where we’ll meet (anthy/utena, revolutionary girl utena)

tv shows

- otp: it’s beautiful (will/hannibal, hannibal)

- otp: i think about your eyes and your mouth and what you feel when you kill someone (eve/villanelle, killing eve)

- otp: a nightingale sang in berkeley square (crowley/aziraphale, good omens)

- otp: two sides of a coin (merlin/arthur, merlin)

- otp: we’ll find each other (barry/cisco, the flash)

- otp: we’re two people who love each other (joan/sherlock, elementary- this is mostly qp/platonic, but it deserves an otp tag)

- otp: you were my flashlight (chidi/eleanor, the good place)

books

- otp: we’ve been good enemies (anne/gilbert, anne of green gables)

- otp: as serious as harpy cancer (elliot/luke, in other lands)

- otp: yes or no (andrew/neil, all in the game)

misc (aka that one band)

- otp: you’re a precious existence to me (nino/ohno, arashi)

there’s probably more that i just can’t think of/haven’t used in forever, but even without that this list is long enough lol. hope this helps/or was at least an entertaining insight on my chaotic fandom history!!

(why,,,why do i have three separate shokugeki otp tags,,,,i don’t even like the manga that much,,,,,,,)

#long post #masterlist #otp tags #ask

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soveryanon · 6 years ago

Text

Reviewing time for MAG134 /o/

- WOW is season 4, so far, the “Learning About Rituals” season. More about Fears politics, yes!! And new names! “Mother-of-Puppets” is such a wonderful name, and I love that it tends to be described as a “she” by people who know a bit about it (Oliver had referred to her in the feminine form too). Jon uses “it”, uses “the Spider”, but in his mind, it’s probably more… masculine?, given how he (almost) met “Mr. Spider” as a kid…

(MAG134) PETER: There are two Powers that, to my knowledge, have never attempted to fully manifest, never had followers set them up for a ritual: Mother-of-Puppets, and Terminus. The Web, and The End. The Web, I’ve never really been sure about: if I were to guess, I would say it actually prefers the world as is, playing everyone against each other, and so on. The End, on the other hand… The End doesn’t really need one: it knows that it gets everything eventually, so why bother. The End manifesting would not be a new world of terror; it would be a lifeless world. Devoid of everything. MARTIN: … Including fear. PETER: Exactly. It has no reason to truly attempt to enter our world, it’s… passive. But The Extinction… The Extinction is… different. It’s active. It will seek to create a lifeless world, in a way that none of the other Powers ever would. Some interpretations suggest it might replace us with something new, that can then fear annihilation in turn. But I and those like me would rather that did not happen.

It makes so much sense for The End!! I’m… however a bit surprised about The Web, though that tracks; but Peter’s overall tone was… way less confident on that one, and I can’t help but wonder, too. Why would The Web not attempt its own ritual? Because it requires a bit of free will to play with, and the success of a Web ritual would mean annihilating any?

I had already got the impression that what Raymond Fielding did at Hill Top Road (MAG059) was a draft or an experiment, in a small microcosm, of what a world under The Web could be like; but now, even more, if The Extinction is confirmed… I wonder if the Fifteenth couldn’t be a deal-breaker, for The Web: if this couldn’t push it to change its mind and decide to set up its own ritual after all, to pick controlling everything over letting everything get destroyed?

- And once again, I’m reminded of how close The Web and Beholding seem to be:

(MAG134) PETER: What does puzzle me, though, and I mean that genuinely, is… why you were piling tape recorders onto the coffin, while Jon was in there. [PAUSE] It’s a question, Martin, it’s– it’s not an accusation. MARTIN: I don’t know. And I just… felt like it might help. He’s always recording, I thought… it–it might help him… find his way out. PETER: Interesting. Were you compelled? MARTIN: [SULLEN] … I don’t know. … M–maybe? I–I, I definitely wanted to do it… PETER: But? MARTIN: I’m… I’m not sure where the idea came from. PETER: You should watch out for that. Could be something dangerous. MARTIN: Sure.

It’s something I had wondered about Jon too: of what he does and thinks, what is coming from his “Insights”, and what is… the Web pulling strings? So far, I got the feeling that Insights give you a certainty: this is a Truth, a knowledge, there is no room for doubt about that piece of information. The Web… pulls you in a direction/makes you do something, and leaves you room to rationalise your actions yourself. What Martin described sounds a lot like how Trevor had described the Web’s effects on him:

(MAG056, Trevor Herbert) “she locked eyes with me. The weirdest sensation began to flow through me; I wanted to leave. It wasn’t like with a vampire, where I would feel like I’d been spoken to. This was just a sudden awareness of my own desire. I’d been sober for three years at that point, but I felt like I desperately wanted to get high, and I knew that the best place to get some was out in the night. Looking back, I think it might have been my own mind rationalising the way I felt my will being tugged out of the room, but it was still very powerful. If I hadn’t had a lifetime’s experience of identifying and fighting off the effect of the vampire’s gaze, I probably would have done it, too.”

Martin did something, didn’t know why, tried to find explanations as to why he did it but explicitly said he wasn’t sure about it. If it was Beholding, I feel like he would have been certain that his actions could have the result they did. The fact that Peter was suspicious of it, and not… directly associating it with one of Beholding’s powers (and given how he told Martin that he needed someone from The Beholding: it would have been a good, natural thing!), seems to confirm that no, it’s not Beholding, it’s something else.

And if it’s indeed The Web, it means:

* that The Web is still around, and still… “doting” on Jon a bit (or at least making sure he’s still in the game). The Web likes/needs/gets its kick with Jon – it had already sent Oliver to wake him up, it made sure that Jon wouldn’t stay stuck forever in the coffin… although it had helped him to go inside. I doubt that it just ~likes~ Jon and wants to cater to him, it’s probably more… curious? about his courses of actions (since it helped him to get Daisy back and ensured his return), but at the very least, it factored Jon in.

* that The Web is able to influence Martin, even with Peter being around. We could still get Web!Martin, people!! Maybe. (Please?) (Especially given that!! If The Web and The End ~don’t have a ritual~: Jon is close to Georgie, and met her after she had been marked. And Martin has always liked spiders, since he was introduced…)

* -> The Web is also getting the information about the new Fear. If it’s real, if Adelard is not mistaken: then The Web is the strongest candidate to want to stop it, is getting all the information… and hasn’t explicitly warned Jon about it, but has nonetheless given him information about how Gertrude stopped rituals (sending him her tape about The Flesh). Slowly training Jon in that regard, maybe?

- … Given how Peter thought that The Extinction could have once been part of The End before it took its independence… I wonder if this could be the case for The Eye or The Web, too, or if they might be currently merging? Mostly because of new technologies and means of communication, because our societies tend to associate control and knowledge – through surveillance?

There is the matter of how The Web and The Beholding both give information – as mentioned above, they’re pretty close. Both have pushed Jon to learn more about the rituals and, if Jon indeed belongs to Beholding, he also has a strong connection to The Web due to his childhood encounter. Peter specifically asked Martin if he had been “compelled” – and until now, the words “compel” and “compulsion” were… Archivist things, the way he forces people to answer his questions. The spiders have been invading the Institute for a long while; Elias has never done nor mentioned anything about their presence nor about Jon’s backstory (but did tell Jon: “And your will is still your own, mostly.” That “mostly” sounded very…) (SomethingsomethingTaperecordersandtheWeb, too, but that’s for another post that I swear I’ll try to finish before it’s completely debunked... as I have been telling myself for the last three months.)

… Interestingly: Peter does not sound comfortable with it, doesn’t sound like he regards it as a potential ally (“something dangerous”). If it’s indeed The Web: does Peter fear to be manipulated himself? Does he dislike The Web due to personal reasons – did Gertrude use it against The Lonely?

Then, it’s possible that The Lonely and The Web are naturally antagonistic (like The Vast and The Buried), or at least a bit opposite on the spectrum of colours-that-hate-me? We know that The Web and The Desolation were mostly enemies through Raymond Fielding and Agnes Montague, though it could have been a personal conflict rather than a visceral feud, but then… Since The Web, by essence, relies on connections and different instances (puppeteer/puppet(s)) while The Lonely is, er, a bit more individualistic and about cutting someone’s ties with everything else, I could see them pretty much opposite, even passively? If Gertrude didn’t use explosives against the Lukases’ ritual, I wonder if she used something having to do with The Web to neutralize it…

- There is some extra hilarity around the concept of The Web snatching Martin right under Peter’s nose and getting him as her avatar while Peter was pushing for Martin to join the Lonely, because… remember the circumstances of Peter’s first appearance? He had (presumably) fed Brian Finlinson to The Lonely in MAG100. Brian who was… precisely pursued by Spiders. So, Peter had whooshed Brian while The Web had laid a claim on him.

The Web in season 4: Forgive and forget? AHAHAHAH NO, RESENT AND REMEMBER, FUCKER.

- I love how we invariably go back to “gERTRUDE–” when we learn new things about what she did. Adding to the long list of rituals she took care of, she derailed or at least made sure that The Lonely lost its chance in this round:

What have you done this time, and when will we learn about that one, and how: through a statement from Peter himself? Through Jon finding a statement left by a witness, in the Archives? Is it why Peter is so cheery nowadays while he used to be described as stern and austere, did the derailing of the Lukases’ ritual somehow make them more emotional and human?

I’m also AWWWW. that the Lukases have a pet-name for their god, “Forsaken”. The word was dropped in a few statements regarding their… activities:

(MAG013, Naomi Herne) “It made me feel utterly forsaken. I started to run, following as much of the road as I could see in the hopes of getting to the other side, but there seemed to be no end to it.”

(MAG057, Carter Chilcott) “I had plenty of food and water, so starvation wasn’t a danger; but sometime in the first week, the clock stopped working. With no timepiece and… nothing left outside of the sun or moon, keeping any sort of time at all became utterly impossible. If I had to guess how long I spent in that strange exile, I would say between three or six months, but that is based solely on my eating and sleeping patterns, which were largely filled by despair and that quiet, aching terror of being utterly forsaken.”

I wonder if one of the Lonely statements we got already contains a hint as to what happened… Did Gertrude do something to Peter’s boat when he was bringing her back from the Great Twisting attempt in Sannikov Land? (We’re not sure about the exact date, it was sometime between October 2009 (MAG126’s statement) and 2011, since Leitner told Jon in MAG080, in February 2017, that he had met Gertrude six years ago, when she had lost her last assistant.) Or did it have to do with Sean Kelly (MAG033), when he disappeared in Autumn 2010? Could it have been through Evan – Gertrude finding a runaway Lukas and convincing him to turn against his family because it would protect Naomi? She was still alive when Evan Lukas died, since Naomi’s statement took place in January 2016 and she mentioned that Evan had died one year prior, while Gertrude herself died in March or May 2015. (Though Gerry and Jon’s discussion about the Lukases implied that they had taken care of killing him, or at least that seems to be Jon’s theory…)

At least, Gertrude hasn’t apparently exploded Peter’s boat, since Jon mentioned that it was still active back in MAG033. So maybe no plastic explosive this time, unless she bombed another of their place of power which wasn’t their house or the boat. Still: Gertrude, what did you do.

- Well, no: the big Mystery, regarding Gertrude derailing The Lonely’s ritual is… not so much that she did, because el-o-el Gertrude., but… how come the Lukases are still financing the Institute? How did you manage to pull that one off, Elias?!

I’m legitimately baffled that Peter seems to imply that maybe Elias would have moved a finger to stop Gertrude if he had understood how much of a threat she was, because… as much as Elias is “not exactly big on action” (Mary Keay’s words), I really doubt this one had to do with ignorance or an ~accidental~ lack of oversight. Elias didn’t have any reason to stop Gertrude when she was eliminating the concurrence? Somehow, however, he indeed managed to do something particularly impressive, in the fact that… nobody seems to be holding a grudge against him? Jude Perry clearly cheered at Gertrude’s death, yet hadn’t apparently tried to burn down the Institute or anything, and even considered that she owed Elias one for killing Gertrude, ergo she didn’t Take Care Of Jon although he pissed her off. Did Elias himself leak the rumours that he was behind Gertrude’s death, in order to get some sympathy/tolerance from the other avatars?

But the Lukases, really? How did Elias manage to get them to give money to the Institute even though an avatar (unwillingly) affiliated to Beholding had made sure that their ritual wouldn’t succeed during this round of the game? Is it because the ties between Mordechai Lukas and Jonah Magnus, and the founding of the Institute, are too deep overall and that managing to neutralise even your technical allies is regarded as fair game? Is it because there is a deep, visceral arrangement between the Institute and the Lukases (maybe having to do with Barnabas Bennett’s bones)? Did the Lukases only begin to give money because Elias had gotten rid of Gertrude?

It also shed another light on the fact that Elias… wasn’t really keen on allowing Jon anywhere near the Lukases, back in season one:

(MAG017) ELIAS: Do you have a moment? ARCHIVIST: Not really, I’m sort of in the middle of something. ELIAS: I understand, it’s just that Miss Herne has lodged a complaint. ARCHIVIST: A complaint? I could just as easily complain about her wasting my time! ELIAS: That’s not how it works, Jonathan. […] Regardless, I would prefer that you not antagonise anyone connected to the Lukas family. They are patrons of the Institute, after all. ARCHIVIST: Fine, fine, I’ll be more lovely. Now, can I get back to work?

(MAG033) ARCHIVIST: […] In addition to such business ventures, the Lukas family also provides funding to several academic and research organisations, including the Magnus Institute. Much as I want to dig further into this, especially given certain parallels with case 0161301, Elias gets very twitchy when we look into anything that might conceivably have funding repercussions.

(I’m still UGHBVGHBHJ that someone sternly called Jon “Jonathan” at some point, and that that someone was Elias. Jon, you know you effed up when… =D) Could have indeed been “JonATHAN, I need that mONEY, just SHUT THE HELL UP when it comes to them”, but also… something about making sure that some Lukases wouldn’t try to get rid of Jon as retribution, since they hadn’t been able to get back at Gertrude, when Jon was still a baby Archivist in the making and unable to defend himself against Spooks? And is it because Elias hadn’t done anything to stop Gertrude that Peter mentioned that he found Elias to be “protective” of his people, when he first appeared?

(MAG100) PETER: […] Now. Am I to understand: you don’t work here? BRIAN: No… I was just, um… making a s–statement, or, or whatever. Um… PETER: That’s probably for the best. Elias can be quite… “protective” of his people. Never really understood why.

That, or the Lukases had put a Restraining Order on all Archivists From The Magnus Institute at this point.

- It’s something I still wonder about, from time to time: the relationship between Elias and Gertrude. Elias clearly knew a lot more than what he let on, although he admitted that Gertrude “got very good at hiding things” from him (MAG102). It’s also related to what/who Elias is exactly (a thing that body-hops, or has been around for centuries/the creation of the Institute or even before? The actual Elias Bouchard, known pothead with terrible grades, who came to the Institute in 1991 and maybe got a revelation or something there?): did Gertrude and Elias’s relationship change over time? Was Elias still New at the job when Gertrude was operating, and genuinely didn’t understand that she had wrapped him around her little finger until very late? Was it mutual manipulation? Was Elias especially lenient since she was doing the dirty work, while he pretended not to know anything about it? Were they actually… actively collaborating, since Gertrude was apparently keeping her collaborators in the dark from each other – Gerry didn’t know that Leitner was hiding in the tunnels, Leitner didn’t know that she had been travelling with Gerry to stop the Unknowing, neither ever mentioned Adelard and Adelard hasn’t mentioned them either, and we still don’t know whether she indeed burned “Eric’s” page (likely Eric Delano, one of her assistants, and strongly suspected to be Gerry’s father – but since it wasn’t Made Official and Jonny pointedly eluded the question in the season 3 Q&A, I’m suspecting that the page might still be somewhere and that Gertrude might have given him sensible information that she wanted to hide, as another trump card in case… something happened to her). We know that Gertrude’s spending was approved by the Institute, including her travelling expenses (which baffled Jon a lot), and given how Elias overlooked Jon’s journey starting MAG103… it appears that Gertrude and Elias at least had a neutral ground on some matters.

I still hope that there is a tape, somewhere, of their last conversation… (We did get Leitner’s murder live, so hey, we COULD get a tape recording Gertrude’s murder, too. Equality.)

- I already made the compilation here but still: it remains so far HYSTERICAL to me that Peter just can’t shut up about Elias, while Elias… has never ever mentioned Peter. Ever. Do they even truly know each other? Who knows. (Does Elias know. Have they been sharing a flat for the past twenty years without Elias even knowing.)

- I was a bit curious about the fact that… most avatars tend to pun so much about their Patron, but Peter doesn’t really use idioms about being alone or lonely? (I had wondered at some point if “The Lonely” wasn’t actually a misconception and their god/Fear actually had more to do with time, since Peter throws references about time pretty often.)

… And maybe it’s in fact that……………. (it’s atrocious and I hate him)………. the equivalent of Lonely puns is when Peter uses “I” when you would expect him to use “we”.

(MAG108) PETER: Ah, I see. I’m sorry to have disturbed you. It’s one of Elias’s little jokes. MARTIN: I don– What? PETER: Did he suggest you record a statement today? One that mentioned me?

(MAG134) PETER: Martin… it’s going to be decades, if not centuries, before I get another chance to bring Forsaken into this world. […] The point is that, yes, obviously, if I last that long, I’m going to try again.

That. Would be fitting for a servant of loneliness (turning a matter of community/shared work into something individualistic) and I h a t e it…

Though apparently, Beholding is sneaking his way into Peter’s speech pattern too~ It was already there when he was appearing in season 3 (MAG108: “Be seeing you, as it were.” / MAG120: “Look, don’t let Elias get to you.”, “Oh, what’s that look for? You won! I am sorry if it doesn’t look quite like you hoped, but… here we are.”, “Oh, and Elias said you’d probably be keeping a close eye on the Archivist’s condition”, “And don’t look so down!”), but it keeps going:

(MAG134) PETER: […] I’ll see what else I can find to help with your reservations […]. I’m only one person, and I can’t keep an eye on everything.

And that last one was Typical Jon Speech (Jon uses “keep[ing] an eye on” a lot) so =D Peter, Beholding is getting to you, whether you want it or not.

- Another Peter thing is that he tends to use Biblical references, quite often compared to other characters:

(MAG108) PETER: Elias Bouchard, getting his hands dirty. Well-well. Must be the End Times.

(MAG134) PETER: […] he’s in there three days, and then what do you know! He manages to pull himself out of the coffin, like a grubby Jesus. And he even brings a Penitent Thief along, in the form of your pet murderer!

It was a bit blatant with Mordechai Lukas (very Jewish name, and Barnabas’s mention that a judge would never choose his side… felt like clear-cut antisemitism), and religious names were present in MAG033 (Tadeas Dahl’s name, the first mate of The Tundra, is close to “Thaddaeus”, one of the Apostles, “Peter” himself being another one; Jon also mentioned that the boat company was mainly owned by Nathaniel Lukas, “Nathaniel” being sometimes fused with Bartholomew), though Evan and Conrad (Konrad?) are a bit out of the loop. Evan had told Naomi that his family was “very religious, and he never had been”, which sounded like an Accurate Way to describe your family when they’re devoted to a God Of Loneliness, but it looks like they’re still raised digging a bit in the Old/New Testament? Or is it just a Peter thing? At the very least, the way he uses the similes as a frame of reference is quite noticeable.

(Not the first time that we’re meeting avatars with a very personal take on pre-established religion or mythology! Tom Haan from The Flesh was also invested, and The People’s Church of the Divine Host was created by “defrocked Pentecostal minister” Maxwell Rayner.)

- Holy Mew, is Peter hilarious even (especially) when he’s terrifying. There is something so fascinating in Alasdair Stuart’s delivery, and I’m not sure I’m able to pinpoint it exactly, but it’s mostly… the overall bouncy rhythm of his tone, combined with the fragmented syntax? Peter doesn’t pause when you’d expect him to, so there is always an element of sudden, unexpected anomaly? when you follow what he is saying. And that’s even without the CONTENT of what he’s saying, he’s so… savage… and gratuitously shittalking… everyone… while at the same time… being a facsimile of a Good Person Caring About Your Consent And Personal Investment…

(MAG134) PETER: … Look. I’m not gonna pressure you into doing anything you don’t want to. It won’t even work unless you’re willing to commit. In any case, I have plenty of preparations to work on myself, before it’s ready. I’ll see what else I can find to help with your reservations in the meantime, mmkay? Just… don’t hesitate too long. We are on a deadline, after all.

Peter “mmkay?” Lukas. (Was it a nod to Martin’s “Mm–okay.” from earlier in the conversation? Because then, Peter plz, you have the same nasty habits of stealing cutesy wording from people around you as Elias, who had stolen Melanie’s “Knock knock?” from MAG098 in MAG104.)

Fear Gods care about your consent, your choices and you willingness to give yourself to it uwu AND I LOVE THAT PETER’S MAIN ARGUMENT AS TO WHY HE IS ~TRUSTWORTHY~ ON THE MATTER OF THE NEW FEAR IS:

(MAG134) PETER: Martin… it’s going to be decades, if not centuries, before I get another chance to bring Forsaken into this world. Your last Archivist saw to that. Honestly, if Elias hadn’t killed that woman, I’d have been very tempted. I warned him she was a danger– MARTIN: Peter! PETER: –but he’s always– MARTIN: Peter. PETER: … Anyway. The point is that, yes, obviously, if I last that long, I’m going to try again. But I’m… rather keen for the world not to end, in the meantime?

Basically: “yES, Martin, I tried to turn the world into a factory farm for my Fear God, and you BET ELIAS’S ASS THAT I WILL DO IT AGAIN if given the chance – so help me get a chance at it?”, with bonus “I’d have murdered that 70-something year old woman, trust me.” Also:

(MAG134) MARTIN: So… so what, you’re afraid of the competition? PETER: Not at all. Honestly, that’s the sort of thing I normally relish; I’ve always been a little bit of a gambler, and the higher the stakes, the better.

yEAH HUM H U M I’m glad that it was confirmed that Peter Is A Gambler, because it was something we could see in Vincent Yang’s story but uuuuh, Peter… Peter… there was something else we could also make of your gambling habits in that anecdote:

(MAG066, Vincent Yang) “I blinked hard as I started to make out two figures above me. One was Salesa, staring at me with an expression of curiosity. The other I didn’t know, though I vaguely recognized him as one of the captains that made port here occasionally – captain Larell, maybe, or Lukas? I don’t really remember. He looked at me, then over to Salesa, shrugged, and handed him a twenty-pound note, before turning around and walking out of the shipping container – which I saw I was once again inside.”

… you apparently bet that the guy would be dead, ie: you tend to gamble on the Worst Outcome and/or you tend to lose. That’s not especially reassuring given what you’re fearing yourself.

(Assuming Elias and Peter indeed know each other and are on relatively good terms: did they have bets on Jon’s overall decisions? Does Peter sometimes visit Elias in prison, did they bet on how many days it would take for him to descend into the coffin? Which one of the assistants would die first? Which Fear would leave a scar on Jon next? Which ritual Gertrude would derail next?)

Peter is terrible and yet, terribly honest about it? I mean, there is obviously a catch, there are obviously things he’s not telling, and you don’t want to trust him, but the comparison with Elias is just jarring. Elias wasn’t especially subtle but he still hid who he was for 80 episodes – we only discovered that he was a Spook himself through Leitner, and Elias would have probably kept up the charade even longer without his intervention. He only admitted to everything when Jon came to confront him with witnesses in MAG092, laying on the table the overall current threat and then… Elias “I should have thought preventing the horrific transformation of our world is not solely my concern!” (MAG102) Bouchard never bothered to mention anything about setting up The Watcher’s Crown, although Gerry mentioned in MAG111 that it would be coming soon-ish, and Peter mentioned that Elias had intended to launch “his ritual” before it wasn’t “an option anymore” back in MAG126. (To Elias’s credits: Beholding’s ritual probably doesn’t count as “horrific transformation” in ~his eyes~.)

There could still be a twist about whether Elias really wants to set up The Rite of the Watcher’s Crown (he… hasn’t been extremely good at making the Archive staff want to help? Honestly, before MAG120, I still wasn’t absolutely sure that Elias was into Beholding in the first place) but. Still. He kept veryyyy quiet about it, while Peter has just casually dropped on the table that yes, obviously, he would have liked to “bring Forsaken into this world” and would like to try again, thank you very much. Peter acts all friendly and faux-caring, hand on his heart and all, while being casually awful, but at least, he doesn’t keep quiet about being awful? He is his own shade of terribleness <33

- Peter’s affableness cracks me up so much (and is genuinely terrifying at the same time! But well: we already know he’s bad news, we already know his family is dedicated to a god of Loneliness, we already know he sacrifices people on his boat, we already know he’s a Spook; it’s the fact that he behaves like a genial uncle which is… hilarious):

(MAG120) PETER: Please, call me Peter. MARTIN: N–no. No, I think I’m okay. PETER: As you like. Look, don’t let Elias get to you. You did very well.

(MAG120) PETER: […] Oh! And if you want to talk to a counsellor, the Institute will of course cover any cost. MARTIN: Hum… thanks? PETER: Don’t mention it. I know how it can be with a new boss. I’d like to help you ease into it.

(MAG120) PETER: Marvellous. And don’t look so down! I know, change can be scary, but eventually it happens just the same. I think we’re going to great things, Martin. Great. Things.

(MAG126) PETER: You talked to him. And that’s understandable, Martin, of course it is! Please don’t think I’m upset, it’s just… not ideal. Shows how much work we still have ahead of us.

(MAG134) PETER: […] I’ll see what else I can find to help with your reservations in the meantime, mmkay?

I can’t believe the Fifteenth Fear wasn’t “Boss who sounds like he just came out of managerial school and learnt How To Try To Pretend To Be Your Friend”. (That “mmkay?” pETER…)

(- THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MENTIONING YOU HAVE A ~FAMILY THING~, TO MARTIN, WHO, AS FAR AS WE KNOW, DOESN’T HAVE ANY FAMILY LEFT AFTER HIS MOTHER D I E D A FEW MONTHS AGO, TWO MONTHS AFTER HE LEARNED THAT SHE HATED HIS GUTS BECAUSE HE LOOKED LIKE THE FATHER WHO HAD ABANDONED THEM WHEN HE WAS A KID… rude, Peter, rude, but then, I guess it was also The Point: even the avatar of loneliness has a family, who sometimes organises gathering. Martin… doesn’t. And isn’t even supposed to talk to his friends and his crush right now.) (Spiders, keep him company? ;w;)

- I have absolutely no idea what Peter’s plan is about and why he needs Lonely + Beholding powers to oppose The Extinction. At least officially, he’s not trying to bring out The Lonely’s ritual since Gertrude ensured that their recent attempt had gone very wrong. If it was about casting it to the Shadow Realm/The Lonely, I understand, but why Beholding…? Is it about neutralizing a fear through categorising it, as Jane Prentiss had mentioned…?

- I LOVE that Peter is so… uncaring and unimpressed with Jon overall.

(MAG134) PETER: And as far as the coffin goes, there’s not much I can do about a bull-headed Archivist– MARTIN: [EXPLOSIVE EXHALE] PETER: –who seems hellbent on self-destruction. My powers only extend so far. […] Because, to be honest, I’m not entirely sure what’s been going on with him, these past couple of weeks. […] Jon wilfully hurled himself into the coffin. I did not intervene, because thankfully, I did not agree to protect your friends from their own idiocy. MARTIN: [HUFF] PETER: Though actually, he gave it more consideration that I thought he would. MARTIN: He’s not a moron. PETER: … If you say so! Regardless, he’s in there three days, and then what do you know! He manages to pull himself out of the coffin, like a grubby Jesus. […] Now, from my point of view, so far, none of this has been any of my business. We have bigger concerns than this little soap opera you call an Archive.

It would make sense that an avatar of Loneliness is especially bored/unimpressed with someone who is doing things out of CONCERN, for people he LIKES and wants to PROTECT because he CARES… but then, Martin is also doing this, and Peter is not ridiculising him (too much) for it. So why the disdain for Jon. Is it because Elias gushed about Jon too much.

- S O B ABOUT THE WAY MARTIN STARTED HIS INTRODUCTION OF THE STATEMENT… because it was textbook “Jon at the beginning of season 3” ;;

(MAG081) [CLICK–] ARCHIVIST: Statement of Jonathan Sims, Head Arch– [SIGH] Former Head Archivist at the Magnus Institute, London, regarding a childhood encounter with a book formerly possessed by Jurgen Leitner.

(MAG134) [CLICK–] MARTIN: [INHALE] … Right. Martin Blackwood, Archi– [SIGH] … Assistant to Peter Lukas, Head of the Magnus Institute, recording statement number 0060122.

Martin’s own title for his introduction was “archival assistant”, they both got stuck on the “arch–”… :: Another similarity between Jon and Martin: they can’t pronounce French to save their lives. (mtb.)

- Surprisingly, there was no sound of a ticking clock in the background… So did the episode take place somewhere else than in Elias’s office, this time around? Or has the clock… stopped…?

(I’m obsessing a bit with the clock but it has been there in the background to mean that things were taking place in Elias’s office before. So I can’t help but get plagued by an ominous feeling every time we hear it… but also, here, that we didn’t hear it, when the previous Martin-Peter exchange had it in the background. As if, I don’t know: time stopped and something is in suspension, something that should have happened didn’t, or what small Beholding protection was left around Martin has been stripped down. I don’t know.)

- It could come in handy at some point, since Peter is… not extremely reliable in that aspect, but amongst the things we never really explored, there were the matter of Gertrude and Jon(!)’s “protections”:

(MAG078) MICHAEL: Even with all the protections you have on, I doubt you can survive them now.

(MAG079) MICHAEL: I think I might also kill you. It would be easier than killing the Archivist; none of you are protected down here.

(MAG080) LEITNER: Hardly a book. Barely twelve pages. It is entitled A Disappearance. […] I have found, however, that reading only one or two words is sufficient to hide me from the prying eyes of your master. It allowed me to talk with Gertrude in relative safety […]. […] LEITNER: How did you know I was here? ELIAS: I didn’t. You’re very well hidden. But Jon is not, and he failed to take the same precautions I’m sure you took for granted with Gertrude. I knew he was talking to someone.

(MAG101) ARCHIVIST: But you… you never tried to take revenge on Gertrude? MICHAEL: She knew how to protect herself. She knew what she was creating.

(MAG102) ELIAS: She was… She got very good at hiding things from me.

(MAG113, Adelard Dekker) “I assume whatever ‘surveillance’ meant you needed me to move it, is only keeping track of you, but let me know if there’s anything I need to be on the lookout for.”

(=> Gertrude knew that she was under “surveillance” back in 2012, and she probably meant Elias with that, and yet, managed to escape him more than he’s comfortable with. So it IS possible.)

So: 1°) there are ways to escape Elias’s prying eyes without relying on the tunnels or the A Disappearance book (was it why Gertrude apparently had something against all representations of eyes? She was cutting eyes from her books and Melanie had found eyeless dolls in the hangar), 2°) Jon also had protections on somehow by the end of season 2, without even knowing it, and we never really learn what it was and who was responsible for them (I mean… it didn’t help him when they were attacked by Prentiss? Would have Beholding lifted a finger (... batted an eyelash from its lidless eye.) to save its own Archivist?)

- There is something about the fact that everyone has begun to call Basira “detective”:

(MAG122) BASIRA: Alright. And you don’t know why this guy would have left a tape recorder? GEORGIE: You’re the detective. BASIRA: And you’re sure it was him who left it?

(MAG127) ELIAS: … Good evening. Detective. BASIRA: I’m not a detective. ELIAS: Of course.

(MAG134) PETER: […] I went to help, but was too late. Then, your detective friend– MARTIN: No, she’s not a dete– PETER: –went on one of Elias’s wild-goose chases

But I don’t know if it’s like, a new running gag or something more. On the one hand, even the “… and Daisy” joke turned out to have Something More behind it (when Elias added “and Daisy, I suppose” amongst the Archives’ losses in MAG120, he probably already knew that she wasn’t actually dead). On the other hand, it could also be due to… Georgie’s initial misconception, and Elias and Peter having a very twisted sense of humour: Georgie called Basira “detective” because she assumed she was one and/or because Melanie had snarked about it to her because Basira now “deals in intel” => Elias Saw the whole conversation and reused it => Peter followed Basira when she went to see Elias, and picked up on it too.

Jared had also identified Basira as police, though, and it’s… really strange that Basira, who resigned back in season 2 (more than one year ago!), who wasn’t taken by The Hunt like Daisy, is nowadays perceived as police more than she was before. Coule she be collaborating a bit with Section 31’d officers…? I’m not totally buying the speculation about “detective” being a Beholding title, though I gueeeeess it has that observing/following/trying to uncover the truth dimension to it…

To quote Basira herself: “I don’t know.”

- There were things that I found especially clever in the way information about the new Fear was delivered to us:

* It was the content of a letter addressed to someone who wasn’t the current reader (Gertrude vs. Martin); the letter was reporting the story of someone (Bernadette) who had studied the life of a Millerite. Different narrators, from different times (Martin reading the letter in 2018 / Adelard writing the letter in 2006 / Bernadette living that experience at least a few months prior / the life and disappearance of Garland Hillier from 1844 to 1867), which… could explain, already, if Adelard misunderstood something.

* The Fifteenth Fear is France, and tbh, yes.

* The way Adelard predicted and quickly addressed Gertrude’s objections and pointed out the motifs that we could be tempted to associate to another fear (Spiral, Lonely, End) but also highlighted that their effects were different. Also, in this context: if it had been something due to The Lonely… Peter likely should have been able to tell given the description. He didn’t. So it indeed wasn’t The Lonely (unless he’s misleading us hard).

* The fact that Adelard didn’t even see the Inheritors himself, that they were only described as “There is nothing done in the history of humanity that deserves the things that come after us.” (FROM SOMEONE WELL-VERSED IN HISTORY…), complete with static, was especially chilling? How bad can they be, to reach this extent – especially when Adelard highlighted immediately afterwards the many ways humans could so easily manage to destroy the world and themselves…?

* The whole description of the wrongness of the flat, of the whole not!Paris, was chilling. The stillness and eeriness reminded me of the remains of Pompeii, the cocoons of the bodies that were found?

* And yet, though removed in time, the thing is coming closer and closer:

(MAG134, Adelard Dekker) “I have my suspicions she may find herself disappearing. She has that… quality about her, I’m sure you know what I mean, o–of an unfinished meal. And I can only hope that when the second course starts, she can remember her way back to Garland Hillier’s apartment once more. But of course, the evidence suggests that, in the end, even he wasn’t able to.”

Adelard assumed that Garland Hillier had disappeared because of the new Fear. Bernadette mentioned that she was supposed to meet with a “Monsieur Pinard” and since we didn’t hear about him… we could guess that he was a victim. Adelard was pretty confident that Bernadette, who had escaped once, was still a target and would be snatched soon (and WOW does “the quality of an unfinished meal” feel… like the accurate way to describe a few statement-givers that we’ve met or heard from), and… we still don’t know what happened to Adelard. In the end, because he was researching them, was he consumed by the Inheritors, too…?

(I’m still suspecting that Peter could be linked to the fact that he doesn’t seem to be around anymore: how come Peter knows that Adelard was researching that new Fear? And Adelard had been the only one to use “Terminus” to refer to The End (MAG113), until Peter in this episode…)

- The way Adelard talked about powers:

(MAG134, Adelard Dekker) “I have never envied you your position, Gertrude. I have never coveted your gifts, as I know the terrible costs that come with them. But honestly, trying to get a description of these… things, these ‘Inheritors’ from Bernadette Delcour, made me wish I could just pull the image from her lips, like you would have been able to.”

… Sounds like he indeed didn’t have any of his own and/or is a “neutral” who miiight actually be a bit more aligned than he thinks? He mentioned that unlike Hunters, he wouldn’t be able to kill a powerful avatar (MAG113) and we only know that he was able to use the table against the Not!Them to bind it (MAG078), though he was really wary of the table itself. We know that there is still that Mystery Statement of 1991 somewhere (it could be how he came in contact with Gertrude for the first time?) and we’ll have to learn at some point what happened to him (;; posthumous letter left before he was snatched by The Extinction or something else? … or he became an avatar of The Extinction himself and screamscreamscream) so… we’ll definitely hear yet more about him. But I wanna know, gdi!! >w<

- So. The Extinction it is (complete with a few alternative names: “This is a fear of extinction. Of change […] of catastrophic change. A change in our world that will wipe out what it means to be “us”, and leave something else in its place. The Extinction. The Terrible Change. The-Future-Without-Us.”), unless Adelard misunderstood something at its chore and other characters will be able to correct it. His reasoning makes sense, though, and is very evocative of real-life and modern-era concerns?

(MAG134, Adelard Dekker) “Mankind will warp the world so much it kills us all, and leaves only a thousand years of plastic behind. Technology will strip us of what it means to be human, and leave us something alien, and cold. We will press a button, that in a moment, will destroy everything we have ever been. Animals are witnessing the end of their entire species within a single generation. These are new fears, Gertrude, and a new Power is rising to consume them.”

And… given that MAG134’s letter (“dated 22nd of January, 2006”) was apparently anterior to MAG113 (“Statement undated, likely circa 2012” – well, assuming that Jon is reliable in dating papers since… if he had a degree in that, we would know.), and that Adelard had noted in MAG113 that Gertrude was “dismissive of the possibility”… it really sounds like there was something to do with the phenomenon of the old generation not being very anchored in the world’s current concerns? Gertrude was amazingly good at handling the Fears, she had fifty years of experience with them and… it would be understandable that, at the same time, she would have overlooked the possibility of a new one, feeling that this wasn’t anything new, that it could be categorised in the pre-existing ones.

If Adelard nailed it and if this Fifteenth power indeed exists… it means that we’ll need a new system to “balance” things out, after Smirke – or maybe it’s precisely because Smirke categorised them so much that what was left at the borders managed to get so powerful? If there is the need of a new Architecture, I’m half squinting at the fact that the Chinese word chosen to refer to Jon in MAG105 could be translated as “architect”, but… I’m still thinking that Basira could end up creating a new equilibrium, since, contrary to Jon, she was immediately good at drawing connections, at understanding how things could work out (e.g. what she noticed about The Dark in MAG108, and how quickly she assimilated the categorisation between the Fears and a bit of their inner politics).

- wOOPSIE does the scale of The Extinction sound like… another category on its own. While The End sounds more like a personal fear, this one is more about a whole community?

I’m still unsure how to categorise MAG065 – “Binary” and MAG122 – “Zombie”; I don’t really feel like either matched this one? I change my mind every time I listen to “Binary” and this time around, I was stricken by simply… how much Spiral it sounded? (Fear of losing one's mind, an incompatibility between two manners of being, Sergei’s reactions which sounded a lot like what Tim had described while in Michael’s corridor.) I really don’t see it as part of The Extinction (or at least not in the way Adelard described it): Sergei had a personal fear of death and ended up experiencing Worse while trying to escape it (which sounded textbook The End), not so much about the fear of being erased and replaced or about a consciousness of the world as you knew it getting destroyed and destroying you at the same time…? Meanwhile, “Zombie” had the replacement motive, but not the narrator’s fear of getting replaced or erased – mostly the idea that everyone else was a fake?

I’m still not sure about these ones and how to look at them, and I feel like it will be the case even when season 5 is over, godsdamnit x””) Everyone has a few of Those Statements that they have trouble categorising, mm? (I know that a lot of people is having a hard time with MAG114’s, which I read as textbook Spiral? But then, I’m at a loss with MAG065 and MAG122, and I guess it’s a good thing, technically, that everyone is at a loss about different ones…)

- However, the way Adelard described The Extinction REALLY put me in mind of… the Not!Them.

Not!Sasha was clear on the fact that it was part of The Stranger, and indeed, its effects (and what feeds it) has to do with the familiar made unfamiliar (MA080: “Once upon a time there was a monster, but no one realised. Sometimes someone did! And then they were scared, so that was good.”). But… when someone is eaten/destroyed/consumed by the Not!Them, does it actually feed The Extinction? Knowing that you will disappear, that your whole existence will be erased and rewritten?

Adelard had tracked the Not!Them for years: did he begin to consider the possibility of a new Fear because of it? Could it be possible that his views of the Not!Them blinded him a bit in the way he tried to define The Extinction…?

- I’m really curious and at the same time NOT to picture what an avatar of The Extinction would be like, if it gets any. (But my brain provides: alt-right politician in nice proper suit, complete with stiff frozen smile.)

- IT MAKES SENSE but in the meantime, I’m still going to laugh (and cry) so much over the fact that… when the series began, Jon’s main concern was to clean and order a dusty shady archive? And now, their main goal has evolved to: they’ll have to fight against the embodiment of the Fear of climate change or nuclear disaster. … Well, Jon had already highlighted how the situation had escalated, back with Georgie in MAG093 and then in MAG117:

(MAG093) GEORGIE: Jonathan Sims, are you trying to save the world? ARCHIVIST: I… Yeah. I… I guess I am.

(MAG117) ARCHIVIST: [….] So, I–I guess, sometime in the next few days, I go on a, eh, commando mission to blow up a wax museum. It’s not exactly what I was expecting. F–from an archiving job.

(bABE…) It… does put in perspective why Peter is so dismissive of the Archives’ problems:

(MAG134) PETER: Now, from my point of view, so far, none of this has been any of my business. We have bigger concerns than this little soap opera you call an Archive.

I mean. He has a point, but at the same time, shut up Peter, let us live :w Do we talk about your blatant tsundere crush on Elias, or on your own sense of Drama with your precisely timed entrances? (YES WE DO.)

But. Yep. Oops. If the new Fear is cataclysmic enough to basically erase everything else and play it solo, no wonder Peter is going :/ about Jon’s philosophical dilemma about feeling alone, changing, what is it that make you “human” or a “monster”, etc. (At the same time: shut up, Peter, don’t act as if you’re not responsible for the loneliness.)

… I wonder if we’re heading towards a “lesser of two evils” deal and this could be the way to get Jon to… willingly try to participate in the Watcher’s Crown…? (I gueesssss that there is still a possibility that the Archives team would manage to completely neutralise it before it becomes an actual threat, but given that we barely know anything about it and that Elias has kept real quiet about it, I feel like it’s meant to become an actual, real Thing at some point? Given that one of the main themes in season 4 so far, thanks to Melanie, Daisy, Helen, Oliver, Jared and Jon himself, has been around the matter of choices in relation to the Entities, and the idea that although they can influence you, you can also choose what to do with these powers, and the actions you take are your own… it would feel like a step back to have Jon utterly manipulated into being a participant, unaware that he is contributing to this one in the end? So if it’s about choice and taking a dubious option out of despair…)

- I Do Not Like This Mention Of Yet Another Door For Very Personal Reasons:

(MAG134, Adelard Dekker) “It talked of Garland Hillier’s “new revelation”, about the absolute change of the world in terms that seemed at first elegiac, but later seemed… almost panicked, with the final entry simply repeating the words [STATIC:] ‘La porte est la porte.’ ‘The door is the door.’ […] The door had been damaged by the builders who uncovered the place, and there were several distinct gaps in the wood. But as she walked back out, the door appeared to be whole. She ignored it, and left anyways, trying to reason it all as a strange quirk of memory. Just one of those things. […] She was more precise on her escape. Remembering Hillier’s words about the door, she had just enough time to retreat back to the apartment and barricade herself inside. Then, she waited until the entrance changed again, and she could emerge back into the world she remembered. At least, that’s my interpretation of events. […] I may try to interview her again later, though I have my suspicions she may find herself disappearing. She has that… quality about her, I’m sure you know what I mean, o–of an unfinished meal. And I can only hope that when the second course starts, she can remember her way back to Garland Hillier’s apartment once more. But of course, the evidence suggests that, in the end, even he wasn’t able to.

… because who has been strongly associated with “doors”?

(MAG080) ARCHIVIST: […] The door opened, and inside was dark. Against that darkness I could see the thin grey strands wrapped around the limbs of my former bully. And then, from inside, stretched two impossibly long limbs, bony and covered in coarse, black hair. For a second, there was almost the start of a scream, but the legs wrapped around him too quickly, and he disappeared into the doorway and out of sight. It slammed behind him, and he was gone, taking the book with him.

(MAG047) MICHAEL: In any case, it doesn’t matter. The Wanderer had a brief respite, but it’s over now. ARCHIVIST: Well, you’re too late. She– She’s gone! MICHAEL: [DISTORTED LAUGH] Yes… Ah… Did you notice which door she left through? ARCHIVIST: Yes… It w– MICHAEL: [CHUCKLES] ARCHIVIST: … wait! No, there was– MICHAEL: There has never been a door there, Archivist, your mind plays tricks on you.

(MAG078) MICHAEL: You – Need – A door. ARCHIVIST: NO. No, I–I just… I need…

(MAG101) MICHAEL: Good. Right this way. [A DOOR CREAKS] Open it. Open it and this will all be over. […] HELEN: The door is open if you’re ready? ARCHIVIST: No, not, not really, but…

(MAG120) ELIAS: […] There is a door in front of him. A yellow door. He knows the dream it used to lead to; he knows it well. But that’s not where it leads anymore. He does not know what is behind it anymore, and he is deathly afraid of finding out. The Archivist turns away.

(MAG127) ARCHIVIST: [SIGHS] It’s… hard. It’s like there’s a–a–a door, in my mind. And behind it, is… i–is the entire ocean. Before, I didn’t notice it, but now, I know it’s there, and I can’t forget it, and I can feel the pressure of the water on it. I, I, I can keep it closed… but sometimes, when I’m around p–people, or–or places, or… ideas, a drop or two will push through the cracks, at the edges of the door. And I’ll… know something. BASIRA: … What happens, if you open the door? [PAUSE] ARCHIVIST: I drown.

(MAG131) ARCHIVIST: I, er… I don’t want to open it! I’m not going to. MELANIE: [SIGH] [KNOCK-KNOCK-KNOCK] She’s been helping us. ARCHIVIST: It has never helped anyone. Not without a cost. […] Right. [INHALE] [OPENS THE DOOR]

(MAG132) ARCHIVIST: [STATIC RISING.] No need for that. I’m willing. [STATIC DECREASES.] [REMOVES THE COFFIN’S PADLOCK] … Right. [CHAIN FALLING ON THE GROUND] [COFFIN OPENING] [CREAKING SOUND]

Mr Spider’s door, which Jon almost knocked on, that swallowed the bully instead of him when he was eight. Michael’s door, which took Helen right in front of him, which Jon had to open to escape the Not!Them, which should have killed Jon another time before Helen replaced Michael and opened another door for Jon – Helen’s own door, that Jon rejected and feared to open in his nightmares, before he agreed to enter the corridors once more in order to meet Jared. The metaphorical door in Jon’s mind, holding back the ocean of knowledge that could drown him. Even: the trapdoor leading back to the Archives, when Tim and Jon went face to holes with Jane Prentiss (MAG039); the door that Jon closed on Leitner alive and reopened on Leitner’s body (MAG080); the door (or trapdoor?) which was the only thing between the group and the Unknowing while Daisy was planting bombs (MAG118); the coffin’s lid, which he opened to join Daisy; the door to Jon’s office, on which nobody ever knocks when they want to find him inside… Jon keeps being surrounded by doorways and thresholds that he has to cross, whose crossings mean a change – whether he loses something or manages to get it back.

I’m… worried about this new door, honestly.

(Because it feels so, so easy and gut-wrenching to picture either Jon or Martin desperately trying to open it while the other is – willingly – staying on the wrong side to try to contain or neutralise these Inheritors…?) (*“Sakura Nagashi” playing in the background.*)

- CHEER UP, BIGGEST TWIST: MARTIN WAS ALMOST JON’S ANCHOR /o/ Looks like he was mostly used as a puppet when it came to saving Jon, but still! (Although yeah, hum, who else could have come to put the tape recorders around the coffin except him? Basira was away. Melanie… probably wouldn’t have been able to WANT to save Jon like Martin did, allowing The Web to pull him towards that action – if it is indeed The Web.) Mayyyyybe Jon was wrong about how he summarised ~Her~, because hum:

(MAG123) ARCHIVIST: Statement ends. The Web does seem to have a preference for those who prefer not to assert themselves.

… it really doesn’t sound like that applies to Martin? (It wouldn’t be surprising at aaaaaall that Jon has trouble understanding how The Web works, even more given that he’s “a tiny bit” influenced by it too.)

- I am SO GLAD about… everything about Martin. I am so glad that, although he was reluctant to call that Lonely guy “Peter” at the end of season 3 and is now calling him that way? He’s using that right, that Peter gave him and insisted on giving him, to make Peter SHUT THE FUCK UP and it’s glorious:

(MAG126) PETER: I’m just saying, that we’d all be better off if your Archivist actually knew how to archive. MARTIN: Peter. PETER: … Yes. Well.

(MAG134) PETER: […] Honestly, if Elias hadn’t killed that woman, I’d have been very tempted. I warned him she was a danger– MARTIN: Peter! PETER: –but he’s always– MARTIN: Peter. PETER: … Anyway.

I am SO glad that Martin is keeping a firm grip on the bastard, that he’s unfurling his frustration and snarking and snapping SO MUCH and taking none of Peter’s shit:

(MAG134) MARTIN: And you thought that since I’m so lonely already, I’d be ideal. PETER: Yes! MARTIN: You see, the thing is, Peter, I’m still not all that keen on being part of any ritual you set up. You know, in fact, if I were to be blunt, I’d say that would be suicidally stupid.

(MAG134) PETER: Because, to be honest, I’m not entirely sure what’s been going on with him, these past couple of weeks. MARTIN: Oh – oh, yeah, sure. […] What, turning invisible and eavesdropping? PETER: If you like. But… I’m only one person, and I can’t keep an eye on everything. MARTIN: Or… anything, apparently!

mARTIN BLACKWOOD, PEOPLE. (Also, I’m still rolling on the floor that Peter very honestly admitted that he picked Martin because he Smelt Like Loneliness. Peter, you vulture.)

Martin also learnt to Master the unimpressed exhalations and the silences:

(MAG134) PETER: […] And as far as the coffin goes, there’s not much I can do about a bull-headed Archivist– MARTIN: [EXPLOSIVE EXHALE] PETER: –who seems hellbent on self-destruction. My powers only extend so far. MARTIN: Mm-mm. PETER: … Look. I’m not gonna pressure you into doing anything you don’t want to.

Which reminds me of MELANIE in front of Elias in MAG106 (before, erh, everything went awful.) so clearly, Martin has been upgrading himself. He had always been snappy but he’s getting so amazing at it lately and I… want… Jon… to see that… so much…

(On the one hand, it would probably be a recipe for disaster and arguments. On the other hand, if Georgie is any indication: Jon tends to love A Whole Lot people who don’t take any shit from him and/or could just plainly wreck him (Daisy.) so… I’m just picturing Martin snapping and snapping out of reflex, after months of intermittent cohabitation with Peter, and Jon’s stupid heart jumping to “… dOKI?!”.)

- … Okay, at the same time, panic aboard because Gerry did mention to Jon that the Lukases are good at grooming, and it’s clear that Peter is currently changing strategy:

(MAG126) PETER: You talked to him. MARTIN: I… I, I tried not to, I–I, I didn’t mean to… PETER: You talked to him. And that’s understandable, Martin, of course it is! Please don’t think I’m upset, it’s just… not ideal. Shows how much work we still have ahead of us.

(MAG134) PETER: … Anyway. Point is, I’m not your captor or your torturer. I’m not gonna tell you to stop talking to him, or even saving him if it comes to it. If that’s not a decision you’re willing to make yourself, me scolding you isn’t going to help.

Is this reverse-psychology from Peter? (=> If he sounds less scolding, then Martin will find the idea of talking to Jon less appealing.) Is it a test?

Because overall… it sounds like Peter’s arguments for Martin to not share his information with Jon are crumbling a bit? We got confirmation that Martin tied himself to Peter after The Flesh attack (so it really wasn’t about Jon!!!! It was about protecting the others because Jon… was in no state to!!!!!!!!!), but then:

Peter is good at ~explaining~ why he didn’t do anything with the threats that we witnessed (Breekon breaking in and delivering the coffin, Jon going inside of the coffin and getting stuck there) but… there is no description of the other threats/enemies that Peter supposedly handled. Do they even exist? And, well. Peter only mentions the “big picture” but:

(MAG126) PETER: [LAUGHS] Because, behind all his bluster, Elias’s just like all the rest. He’s so preoccupied playing the game he doesn’t pay attention to the big picture. He managed to convince himself that he could get his ritual off first, which would have made all of this a… bit moot, but that’s not really an option anymore.

(MAG134) PETER: You know what the stakes are now, and I just have to hope you’re with me on this, focusing on the big picture. MARTIN: … Yeah.

… why, then, is he trying to stop the Fifteenth on his own if it’s so dangerous? Of all entities, The Web and The End should be very keen to help (plus, all the ones who lost their chance at their ritual in the current cycle)? And Jon just proved that he is willing to risk his life himself, and Peter has demonstrated that he wouldn’t be lifting a finger to prevent him from doing it… on his own. And Peter, who had accepted Martin’s “advice” in MAG108:

(MAG108) PETER: So your advice would be “less murder”? MARTIN: I… I s–suppose…? PETER: No, no, it’t, it’s a good observation! I thank you for it. MARTIN: You’re… welcome…

… was confirmed (in MAG127) to have wooshed two researchers when Jon was in a coma, and casually mentioned murder intents towards Gertrude. It doesn’t really sound like he’s holding his end of the bargain, does it…?

- Another twist is that, actually, Martin is keeping track of what is happening in the Archives? Which is not what he told Jon in MAG129:

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: If–if you do need to talk, I– MARTIN: I can’t. ARCHIVIST: No. No, o–of course. [INHALE] Listen, Martin, you should know– MARTIN: Jon– ARCHIVIST: –Daisy might be alive, Basira is– MARTIN: Stop. Stop, please, I–I shouldn’t know any of this, I… [PACKING UP] I–I–I really need to go, I–I’m… ARCHIVIST: Right. … right.

Was it just because it mattered that Jon was telling him it? Or did Peter inform Martin of Breekon’s presence himself? Or did Martin’s deal with Peter change a bit because Martin coldly asked Peter why there was suddenly a big coffin in Jon’s office.

- … I find it especially interesting that in the summary of the Archives situation during season 4:

(MAG134) PETER: Martin, this is what we agreed. After The Flesh attacked, you came to me. MARTIN: [SIGH] PETER: And I’ve held up my end of the bargain, despite your continued hesitation. Your friends have been largely untroubled by the many – many – enemies that they have made. MARTIN: What about the delivery guy? Breekon. And the coffin? PETER: Was that its name? To be honest with you, I thought it was dead. MARTIN: You thought wrong. PETER: True enough. And as soon as I learned it was here, I moved to intervene, but, well. It turns out I wasn’t really needed. And as far as the coffin goes, there’s not much I can do about a bull-headed Archivist– MARTIN: [EXPLOSIVE EXHALE] PETER: –who seems hell-bent on self-destruction. My powers only extend so far. […] As I said, one of the last shreds of the Circus delivered a gateway into Too-Close-I-Cannot-Breathe. I went to help, but was too late. Then, your detective friend– MARTIN: No, she’s not a dete– PETER: –went on one of Elias’s wild-goose chases, then Jon wilfully hurled himself into the coffin. […] Regardless, he’s in there three days, and then what do you know! He manages to pull himself out of the coffin, like a grubby Jesus. And he even brings a Penitent Thief along, in the form of your pet murderer!

… Peter didn’t mention anything about Jon removing Melanie’s bullet (and getting stabbed in the shoulder), nor about Helen’s door and her corridors containing Jared. Both took place in the tunnels so, maybe, in the same way as Elias, Peter had trouble using his powers inside of them, and/or knows that he wouldn’t be quite as invisible down there?

I’m really really intrigued about the fact that Helen wasn’t mentioned: is it because Elias and Peter don’t factor her in, since the Distortion is mostly an ~irritant~ and not expected to be helpful? Or are they completely unaware of her presence? It’s unclear whether Martin was aware that Helen was the one who had saved them from Jared, but if he is… same as with Basira who hid it from Elias: he might be hiding it from Peter. Martin didn’t have a great time with The Distortion, but at the same time… Tim and Martin had seen “a woman” wandering in the corridors, when they were trapped inside of them at the end of season 2, and Martin had felt guilty over the fact that they hadn’t saved her:

(MAG080) TIM: […] … Any sign of the woman…? MARTIN: I don’t think so. [PAUSE] We should have helped her. TIM: No. MARTIN: But we could have tried! TIM: How? MARTIN: …

So: can’t be sure on that point yet, there are too many “if”s to be certain (maybe Martin totally missed the fact that Helen had saved them because he was running away and then went to Peter and began to cut ties with Basira&Melanie; maybe Martin knows she’s downstairs and discussed it with Peter but Peter is overlooking her) but… it’s possible that Martin is currently being way more cunning than he lets on. We know he can use his own weaknesses for deception – he demonstrated it in MAG116 – so… Maybe. Maybe he’s a bit less desperate than he pretends to be; maybe it has always been a matter of exerting some control over Peter, of investigating what Peter wanted from him (and now getting all the information he can manage about the Fears’ politics and the Fifteenth), biding his time to get rid of him…? (I don’t want to hope too much, but at the same time… Martin is firm as steel, right now. Even in the trailer, when he almost broke down, he got back on his feet and became firmer after the call. On the one hand, he had all the reasons in the world to be at his most vulnerable, with his mother dying, The Flesh attacking and him proving once again that he couldn’t help, and Jon not waking up, and I’d be perfectly content picturing that he was genuinely desperate and afraid and didn’t have hidden motives when he negotiated Peter’s ~protection~. On the other hand, it’s a constant thing in the series that people and listeners both underestimate Martin Blackwood.)

- I was suspecting that Peter could turn invisible/not be felt while in the same room as others (since he had implied he’d witnessed Elias’s arrest in MAG120), it’s more or less confirmed… though it could be something else entirely given Peter’s answer:

(MAG134) PETER: Martin… My patron, hopefully our patron someday, doesn’t give me any sort of special insights. I’m not quite the accomplished voyeur that Elias was. I have to keep tabs on things the old-fashioned way. MARTIN: What, turning invisible and eavesdropping? PETER: If you like. But… I’m only one person, and I can’t keep an eye on everything.

So that’s probably also why Martin was so stiff with Jon in MAG124 and MAG129: if he knew that Peter could be there and see everything, he had to try his best to be blameless, even before considering the whole “not telling Jon anything for Jon’s own good” shtick. I had noticed that it felt like Basira and Martin were acting as if they were constantly under surveillance (even worse than during Elias’s time!) so given that it seems to be the case… I wonder if Basira is suspecting that, indeed, Peter is sometimes there but you just can’t feel him. Hence her being so careful about what she says, and refusing to say anything meaningful overall.

(If Daisy’s Hunter instincts come back… maybe she will be able to feel him?)

- … And if Peter needs to be there to keep tabs on people… UHUH, is it meaningful that he repeated twice that he was just leaving?

(MAG134) PETER: Right! Then, if you’ll excuse me, I have a family thing to get to. MARTIN: Are we going to talk about Jon? PETER: … Do we need to? […] Okay! Now, I really am running late, so if you don’t mind? [CLICK.]

I don’t want to hope too much about it but: if Martin were to try to make a move to share information or use a back-up plan or something (leaving the tape of his recording somewhere for Jon to find it? Or Adelard’s letter? Or sending something to warn how Peter might be able to spy on the Archives team? Or going to see Jon directly?), this could be the perfect opportunity since… Peter won’t be there to see it. Not banking on it, but. Given that Peter wasn’t especially convincing as a protector and that Jon has demonstrated that he would find danger by himself if left on his own, and that Martin now knows that Adelard Dekker was indeed tracking a Fifteenth power… there have now been enough deal-breaking events and information to want to change strategy; it wouldn’t come out of the blue if it happened soon?

Title for MAG135 is out and HHHHHHHHHHHHH. It. sounds too easy to speculate “The Dark” here but at the same time… AT THE SAME TIME, IT SOUNDS LIKE THE PERFECT TITLE FOR MANUELA DOMINGUEZ’S STATEMENT??? THE LAST OF THE DAEDALUS SPACE STATION STORIES??? *o* (I… really don’t see how Jonny could find a more perfect title for this one, so? Plus, we haven’t had a Dark statement since season 4 began, so.) If it’s the case, then: the title already contains two meanings; if there is a third one, could be by taking it like… Heavy Unpleasant Discussion before or after the statement (Jon-Basira? … Basira-Elias…………..? We’re definitely due for a debriefing about what Elias sent her to, if his main goal was just for her to leave Jon alone, or if indeed he had her search for something tangible and where and what…)

(Other ~highlight~ of the week: we’re getting Martin’s eighth poem on Patreon on Friday, complete with Discord event dedicated to Martin’s poetry run by Anil, BLESS HIM………………) (/ Curse you all, I’m not in Belgium, I can’t follow the AMA through Aza’s account this time around so that means having to get a discord I guess ;;)

#peter: *ranting for the fifteenth time this month that gertrude could be a danger*#elias *signing the paper approving of gertrude's additional expenses for plastic explosives #with a check from the lukases*: ahah preposterous.#the magnus archives #mag134 #tma liveblog #tma spoilers/#tma season 4 #long post/

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longestnight64448 · 7 years ago

Text

It is ok to cry *George Weasley x Reader*

It was raining. Rain poured down upon the Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes' window.

That's me, George Weasley, sitting at the table near the window, staring outside. Just two months ago, my best friend, business partner, partner in crime, my twin, Fred Weasley died. I refuse to accept my twin's death; I mourn over his death like it happened yesterday.

Well, I don't cry anymore. I must have cried it all out in the first week.

Things haven't been too well between my family and I, since the bloody events of the Second Wizard II. Everyone tiptoes around me, thinking I'll snap. Because of this, I try to avoid the Burrow as much as I can.

I sighed due to the terrible weather and hung my head low. In truth, it perfectly suits me now, angry and depressed.

A cup of coffee is placed on the oak table in front of me. Its steam rose up and filled my face. I glanced next to me to see my employee, Lena Mayfield. Ever since Fred died, I worked the shop alone. It was our dream; I couldn't let the shop go to waste. It was probably the one thing that kept me alive. A few weeks after Fred's death, I hired Lena to help me.

Her deep ocean blue eyes showed concern for me, along with her shoulder length auburn hair flowing down gently. The fact that she didn't wear makeup or flashy clothing, made her look beautiful. Blimely, if Fred was here, he'd flirt with her like crazy. Sigh, great. She even reminds me of Fred.

"Um... Mr. George, sir, I-I thought you might want some coffee. I-It's almost opening time."

I didn't answer; I was too focused on Fred. A long moment of silence passed between us.

"Oh! I-I see. Um... you don't have drink it! I-I can drink it!" Her reaction was of a child's.

I snorted under my breath. "No, no. I'll drink it," I sipped the warm beverage, taking in its sweet aroma, "It's delicious!"

"Really? That's great!" she cheerful smiled at me. Suddenly, lightning could be hear from outside.

Continuing, Lena commented, "It's quite a big rain storm today, huh?"

"Yeah. I don't like it." I grumbled quietly.

"But, the rain's good for something. The trees and plants wouldn't be able to grow without it. And plus, the sky's always so blue the day after." She once again beamed at me, but with gentleness, this time.

"That's true." My lips twitched into a grin. Upon seeing this, she gasped.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"You smiled!" she replied happily.

"Huh? But I smile lots of time! You've seen me!"

"But it's the first time I've seen you genuinely." What? "Whenever customers come in, you force a smile on. Something's wrong and I could tell since I first came here. You're sad, and you don't know what to do." Lena worriedly claimed.

I didn't say anything. I was debating whether to tell her or not.

"Ah! I'm so sorry!" she cried, "You don't have to say, if you don't want to. Please forgive me, Mr. George, sir." Her brown hair covered her blushing face like a veil as she held her head low.

"Fred." I instinctively said.

"Huh?"

"It was Fred," I sniffed a little; "Fred was my best friend... business partner... partner in crime... my twin. He was killed by a death eater."

*Flashback*

I was waiting. Waiting for Fred, Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Percy to be back, along with the rest of my family. 'I hope they're okay.' I thought quietly, while pacing back and forth, expecting at any time a death eater popping up, ready to kill me.

"George, they'll be fine." Mum said as if she read my mind.

"Yeah." I convinced myself that Mum was right.

The door of the Great Hall was swung open with Percy carrying Fred.

Along with the rest of my family, we rushed over to Percy. Dad assisted Percy in hauled my twin over to one of the tables.

"Percy, is Fred okay?" Ginny innocently asked.

Percy let out a sob, "I'm so sorry." he muffled.

Realization hit me. My brother, my best friend, my twin, Fred Weasley was gone. I threw myself over him and bawled for Merlin-knows-who. The Golden Trio eventually returned, but it didn't matter. My brother was dead.

*End of Flashback*

I took a deep breath after finishing my story; Lena's eyes soften and turned sad.

"I'm... sorry." Lena whispered dejectedly, "I shouldn't have forced you tell me."

"It's okay." I tried to force a smile for her, but failed miserably. Tears began to well up in my brown eyes.

"Damn it." I cursed. I turned away from Lena.

"Eh?" she naively questioned.

"I must be an idiot. I'm an adult; I shouldn't be crying."

"It's okay to cry." Lena simply stated. "Sometimes tears are the best way to deal with sadness."

I didn't say anything, being too surprised by her insightful advice. I position my chair so I was facing her. She continued, "Crying isn't something you should ashamed of. If you think you're going cry, then you should cry."

Her statement was something a kid would say. None the less, that statement caused my mask of cheerfulness to break down. My body began to shake uncontrollably, and my rough hands covered my face holding the salty tears. Then, I felt Lena pull me into an awkward hug. I latched on to her arms and wailed openly. She stroked my ginger hair like a mother would to her child, softly smiled and began to sing.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

It seemed like forever before I finally calmed down. When I did, Lena tenderly guided me to my room in the apartment upstairs. I fell tiredly on my bed.

"Rest." Lena firmly ordered "I'll take of your store, sir." With that, she left the apartment to start the delayed opening of the store.

Throughout the day, I could hear crashes, followed by panicking screams, along with the bell on the door ringing constantly, signifying many customers were coming in and out. I laughed heartily; Lena really does try her hardest.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

"G-George, I really don't want to come." Lena whimpered childishly.

"Lena, they'll love you. Who wouldn't?"

"You're just saying that to make me feel better."

It's been six months since Fred's death. Ever since I cried in front of Lena, my wounds started to heal even more. I owe this to Lena. Since then, Lena's been helping me get over the sadness. Things between my family changed for the better; they realized I was becoming noticeably happier, like how I use to be. Sometimes I feel sad, but Lena cheers me up a little. If I am in a bad mood, she brews me a cup coffee (BY HAND) or gives me a piece of candy.

"The little things are the best things in life." she once told me.

She understands I won't completely be over Fred, but helps me through the worst of it. Now, the two of us are about to go to Bill and Fleur's anniversary party. Although, she's reluctant to come out of her apartment's bathroom.

"No I'm not," I protested with a laugh, "Mum would love you like a daughter, Dad would be questioning you constantly about muggles, Ron and Harry would think you're adorable, and Ginny and Hermione would be happy to see another girl."

"Fine." She pouted and peeked her head from the door, "I'll come out. Don't laugh."

Laugh? No way! My reaction was the exact opposite. I was in a daze when she stepped out. She was wearing a simple long white dress, a pair of silver flats, no makeup, hair down and completed with a single pearl necklace. Upon seeing my face, she blushed and flipped her auburn hair in front of her.

"I knew I should have wore pants." She lowered head, covering her red face.

"No, no! You look beautiful!" She truly did. I then dragged her closer to me. "Here we go." I flicked my wand out and apparated us to the Burrow.

We appeared in the front of the Burrow, where Ginny, her boyfriend, Harry, and my old friend Lee Jordan, were about to go to the backyard.

"George!" Lee exclaimed, "It's been a while! How'd you been?"

"Very well." I replied, "What about you, Harry?"

"Good." Harry smiled and shook my hand.

"Hey George, who's that?" Ginny asked, pointing at the person behind me.

Ginny was staring at Lena, the shy brunette hiding behind me.

I introduced Lena, "This is Lena, a good friend of mine."

"Hi Lena, I'm Ginny Weasley." Ginny held her hand out with a warm smile.

"Lena Mayfield; i-it's nice t-to m-meet you." Lena shakily shook my younger sister's hand.

*Later in party*

I was right about my family's opinion; they all loved her and immediately welcomed her into the family.

I was chatting with Lee, Ron, and Harry, when Lee started questioning me about Lena.

"So Georgie, where'd you meet a pretty girl like her?" he inquired, with curiosity.

"She's my employee."

"Is she single?"

That just earned him a glare, "Yes." I attempted to stay calm, "But she's unavailable."

"Fine, fine." Lee heaved a sigh, "She's already got you."

"We're just friends."

"Yeah, but you want to." Ron pointed out.

"I don't."

"George, it's obvious that you adore her. There's no denying it." Harry keenly said, "And I'm pretty sure, she feels the same way."

Was he right? Did I really like her that way? I noticed from a distance Lena was staring at me; I gave her one of my most charming smiles. Lena, who was already blushing, flushed an even brighter red. Her face reminded me of a tomato. I pulled her away from Hermione and Ginny, who was chatting with her, and begun to dance with her, when a slow dance song played. Lena's eyes glowed like the stars as we danced gracefully under the moonlight.

Apparently, Harry was right about me liking Lena. She was becoming the most important person in my life. Not a day could pass by without seeing her. As time passed by, I began to notice the down-to-earth features Lena had that made her look hot. The way her auburn hair swayed when she moved... her clear sea blue eyes... her slim body along with a few nice curves... that cheerful smile of hers... her simplistic nature... the way she blushed so easily... ok, I should probably stop now; you get the point now. I was falling head-over-heels in love with that girl.

While I spotted many attractive traits about Lena, I also noted a hidden sadness in her eyes. It was the most visible when we were at the Burrow for Sunday Dinner. I'd ask her several times if she was okay, but she'd smile and say she's fine.

What was she hiding? I don't know!

Anyways, I was closing the shop for today, when Lena asked me for a day off.

"A day off?" I repeated.

"Yes, a d-day off. Tomorrow."

"Sure, just why?"

"Um... I have something important to do." She quietly answered.

Pressing on, I questioned, "Which is?"

"I'd rather not say." There was that sadness in her eyes again. Then, her eyes lit up again and she softly smiled, "Don't worry; I'll see you the day after tomorrow."

Well, I couldn't sleep that night, since I was too worried about Lena. Something just didn't seem about that smile of hers... That's when I decided; I'm following her where ever she's going!

The next morning, I was waiting outside Lena's apartment. When she came out, she was wearing her normal clothing; a pair of jeans, a shirt, sneakers, and an overcoat. Except she was also carrying a small bouquet of red roses as well. I hid in the shadows as she walked out of her dwelling.

For the next two hour, I followed Lena around. She went to several different places, which had no connection to each other, but later in the day, she unpredictably, journeyed down to the Muggle world, where she then went to a muggle graveyard in London.

She stepped silently across the cemetery, careful to not make any noise.

'Muggle graveyards are just as depressing as wizards.' I grumbled, hiding behind the tombstones. Then I noticed she stopped at one of graves.

"Hey Claire." She greeted, "I'm sorry I couldn't visit you earlier; well you see... I... Oh!" Her ears perked up, "I brought you some roses. They're pink; just the way you like them." She placed the bundle of roses in front of the grave; stillness filled the air. "Anyways, I met this guy... actually, he's my boss. His name is George Weasley. He's a prankster, but a kind person none the less. I think you two would have gotten along very well." She smiled softly hearing that statement. "He... lost his twin, Fred Weasley, during the Second Wizarding War. Strange," she was wearing a thoughtful look, "It sort of reminds of what happened to you..."

What surprised me was that there were tears forming in the corners of those sea blue eyes of hers. Because of this, I accidently stepped on a fallen branch. Hearing this, she swiftly wiped her tears away and called faintly, "Who's there?"

Deciding it was best to just be earnest, I appeared from my hiding spot. She glanced at me for a second, before plastering a fake happy smile. "Oh! George! What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at the shop?"

"I closed it for today." I changed the subject abruptly, "Who's that?"

"My sister, Claire." She turned her back on me. Not letting me start, she continued, "My mother... died giving birth, and my Dad died in an accident the same day. I never really knew them. The only relative I had was Claire, who was only twenty at that time." I was shocked; how could someone was so shy, so sweet have a past like that? "My sister... gave everything up for me. Instead of going to America for college, she went to a nearby one in London, so she could raise me." Even from behind, she was obviously upset. "Anyways, she was a-a lab assistant for a famous Muggle scientist. One day, her boyfriend, Lloyd was going to propose to her. I was really happy for her. She was always doing something for the sake of another. So I wanted her to be happy for herself. But... o-on that day, that was a dangerous experiment her boss was doing and she was needed to assist him. It was a failure; the experiment caused an explosion and lit the building on fire. S-she didn't live... I was only seven." Lena choked out with sadness. She let out a few sobs in attempt to not cry.

Instead of sympathizing her like a normal person would, I bravely took a step towards the hurt girl and embraced her tight from the front.

"There, there." I cooed, "It's okay to cry."

"I'm not crying." She muffled into my shirt.

"Yes you are; my shirt is wet." I stroked her shiny hair, "Besides you did say crying is the best way to deal with sadness." She looked up at me for a long time, as if she was waiting for a reaction. When I kept a determined face on her, tears started flowing rapidly down her face.

"Oh!" she tried to wipe them away, when she realized. This just made me hug her tighter. Things went downhill for her there. She cried uncontrollably into my chest; she must have been holding it in for a very long time. For a long time, I just stood there comforting her as she cried. I barely remembered what happened during that period of time, but I do recall it was snowing lightly, as it was trying to soothe her. When she finally calmed down, I did the most unexpected. I held her face up to mine and crashed my lips on to her's. There was no need to tell her; I think she figured it out from my actions. At first, she was astonished, then she slowly melted into the kiss. When we parted, she turned her characteristically shade of red. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Q-quit laughing!" she cutely fumed.

"Why not? It's cute!" I grinned brightly, and once again leaned down to kiss her, "C'mon, let's go to shop; we can still open it for today." I began to leave the graveyard.

For a second, Lena stood there, shocked, but then, she beamed cheerfully and chased after me, "Yes!" She grasped my hand as we left the cemetery with our hands entwined.

#george weasley x reader #george weasley imagine #imagine #fanfics

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