#i love fiddling with custom brushes IDK

[astranauticus]

RWD S4E9 SPOILERS

we really do be getting some incredibly fun new lightning flavours from VR-LA these past few episodes huh. anyway black necrotic lightning <3

[shesjustanothergeek]

His Love

|Aegon II Targaryen x FemReader|

Part Two

Master List of Series

Summary: Being a bastard born in the slums of Flea Bottom was all you were known for. Not the streak of white you had in your dark hair, the violet ring around your pupils, nor how your sharp tongue and skills with the blade resembled your father, Daemon Targaryen. You were just a bastard, nothing more, but to him, to Aegon Targaryen, you were everything. You were his love.

Author's Note: OMG, OMG, OMG, THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR THE LOVE! I hope I tagged everyone that wanted it. I thought few people would be interested in this story, so THANK YOU.

Chapter Warnings: Literal fucking grooming like IDK what else there is.

A pounding on your bedroom door woke you. You didn't want to listen as they shouted at you to get up, curling further into your scratchy wool blankets.

Thump, thump, thump, it sounded again. You groaned, slinking off the bed and down the straw mattress, hugging yourself against the cold.

"Yes," you answered the door in a sing-song voice, leaning on the frame. Lyra quickly ran inside your room, shutting the door and locking it from the inside. You looked at her, puzzled, as she ran around, closing the curtains and going into your small wardrobe. "What are you doing?" You asked, following her with your eyes as she scurried like a mouse.

"We must hurry. It will not be long until he is here." Her hair was wild as she found your satchel, shoving as many clothes as she could into it.

You were on her heels in an instant. "What? Who is coming, Lyra?" You attempted to put your hand on her shoulder, but she brushed it off, your panic slowly beginning to match hers.

"Make haste, sweet girl. Get your shoes," she pointed at the two lumps of worn brown leather, throwing them when you didn't move.

"Lyra, please speak plainly. You are frightening me," you said softly, fiddling with your thumbs.

At the sound of your timid voice, Lyra finally stopped, turning to you quickly as she saw the expression on your face.

In her panic, she ignored you, forgetting what Madam had told her. Her words had been grave, trusting Lyra with the news that had reached them from the Red Keep. Lyra couldn't tell you the truth; that was made clear to her by Madam. It could make things so much worse, but seeing you standing there, with glassy eyes and a girlish demeanor, so kind and innocent, made her heart melt.

"We-we have to..."

Lyra couldn't do it. She couldn't lie to you. She trusted Madam's judgment to keep this as vague as possible, but she didn't have to speak face-to-face with you. Lyra wished she had been there instead.

"Oh Gods, please forgive me Madam," Lyra begged, cursing herself for what she was about to do, looking up at the ceiling. "Your father is coming. He means to take you away from us."

Your mouth fell open, a dreadful yet excited feeling churning in your stomach. "My father?" You asked, unsure if your sleepy ears deceived you.

"Yes, he is coming here. Please hurry." Lyra shoved as many items as she could fit into the bag, handing you a dark cloak as she unlocked the door and stepped into the hall.

Too much time had passed with the whisper game everyone connected to the royal family played. Lyra knew what it would mean for him to come here, but whether it was to kill you or have you be with your blood relatives, she did not know. Either outcome was not something she wanted you to experience.

You were frightened by Lyra's body language as she led you through the candle-lit hallways and down the creaky, wooden stairs. The only way to either exit was through the main floor or down into the cellar, and even then, you would still have to navigate through the working women and their customers. Your father had not made his appearance yet, and Lyra was relieved as you reached the last step that everything seemed normal.

You had never met him, your father, or anyone related to you by blood. Your mother had left her family long before you were conceived. A land that was far to the North, Madam had once told you, but other than that, you had yet to learn where they could be.

It made you feel guilty how flustered Lyra was as she yanked you to the back exit, that you were thrilled with the possibility of meeting a relative. You couldn't understand why they would be so scared of him. He stayed away this long without so much as a letter, so who was to say that he would show?

You were sure he only wanted to see you as a parent would for a child they hadn't known existed. If he genuinely cared about your mother enough to commit such actions with her, why hadn't he come sooner? Indeed he would have seen your mother pregnant. There was no way she could hide something like that forever. That part always needed clarification for you. Ma refused to give you the full details no matter how much you bugged her, and all of the other girls would glace quickly to the side and excuse themselves when you asked.

"Lyra, why is my father coming for me now, after all these years? Madam said he did not want me. Did Ma lie to me?" Lyra froze, looking around the dim hallway that led to the back door.

She was taken aback by how plainly you asked these tough questions, by how you would stare up at her with wide eyes, curiosity being the only emotion in them. You did not beat around the bush. Even at a young age, you knew what you wanted and would not dance around it. It was a trait few adults possessed, and Lyra admired it.

"No, no. The Madam would not lie to you," she brushed the strands of hair tussled by sleep as she stared her blue eyes into yours. "She would never lie to you, dearest." You narrowed your eyes at her before you spoke.

"Then why is she so afraid of him?"

Lyra made a noise in the back of her throat, unable to answer. She knew she couldn't tell you of your father's status. As a girl with an investigative mind, she realized that you would want to be with him if you found out. What child wouldn't?

"Lyra, I want to stay and meet him." You crossed your arms and planted your feet, stating your final position.

"No, you cannot," she protested quickly, grabbing your bicep and attempting to lead you to the exit. You stood firm, unwavering with your decision as she tugged again.

"Stop this foolishness! You do not wish to meet your father," she said, frustrated.

"Yes, I do!" You pulled your arm out of her grip, backing up and few paces. "I have been good, Auntie! I haven't asked Ma about my father in a very long time. I have never asked her to see him, or have attempted to run away to meet him!"

Your voice was more complex. You were pouring out all the questions you had kept bottled since you could think.

"Why has Ma not let me see him? Why has she kept me hidden since I was born?" Lyra pursed her thin lips in sympathy, feeling for you as she saw tears well in your exotic eyes. She knew of the apparent reasons Madam treated you the way she did, but Lyra could not speak for Madam, and no explanation was able to form.

"Tell me, Lyra, tell me," you shouted.

She began to plead with you, attempting to grab your hands as you kept retreating further and further away from her until both of you were no longer near the back exit. "I cannot speak for Madam, but you know she loves you. You know that everything she has ever done has solely been in your best interest, to protect you!"

"To protect me from what? My father? To save me from being with my own blood?" Your hands gestured wildly, tears now flowing freely down your plump cheeks.

"We are your blood, not your father!" Lyra clutched her chest, her voice and face mirroring yours. "We raised you! Ma raised you, not him! We taught you to walk, led you to speak, made you who you are now! We cleaned your scraped knees and picked the rocks out of your hands when you fell! I helped you through your first bleed! Does that mean nothing? Does the parent you have never met mean more to you that that?"

You hiccuped, rubbing vigorously at your snot and tear-covered skin as Lyra approached you as if you were a frightened animal. Perhaps you were; you certainly felt like one.

"Let her go then," Madam's voice startled the both of you as she entered the brothel. "Let our daughter leave us to be with the man who will never care for her. Not like we have." Lyra looked between you, eyes flickering rapidly as she tried to understand Madam's reasoning.

"Madam," Lyra protested weakly, "I do not understand..."

Ma had an expression on her face you had never seen directed at you before, only at patrons who had disrespected her in some way before she kicked them out.

The conflict raged within you. Your chest tightened, a string suffocating your heart until it could not beat. Your mind knew it wanted Madam, the woman who had loved you unconditionally, it seemed, up until this moment, but the young, selfish, reckless part of you wished for the man they kept you from. That could be something you and your father had in common. A trait that could be passed on even without his presence.

"Ma..." you said, voice soft and quiet like the kid you were.

"If it is your father you want, it is your father you will see."

The pain in your chest was replaced with fear as Ma walked towards you, grabbing you by the scalp. You yelped and shouted in protest, trying to break free without hurting yourself even more as she dragged you to the front door, stopping and positioning your face to hers.

"Lyra. The bag." She mentioned with her head as Lyra handed it to her, staring at it for a moment before shoving it into your torso and opening the door. You stumbled backward into the busy street. The loud sounds of people chattering with drunken slurs were the only thing you could hear. A woman you had never seen stood in Madam's place, years of love and memories all wiped from her mind.

"Do not return here. Be with your father."

You hated the streets of Flea Bottom. It was always crowded, and now, in the heat of high summer, that was the last thing you wanted. It wasn't so bad from your place under a fabric awning, but the stink of bodies, all perspiring from the morning work, was enough to make even the freshest milk curdle. The air shined with humidity and heat. The puddles from yesterday's storm were warm as you washed the sweat and tears from your face.

The market deflated slightly, everyone closing their stalls for a midday meal as you sauntered from your hiding spot. The merchants were distracted and careless, and you quickly grabbed whatever you wanted from their stocks, indulging your childish desires. Your satchel bulged with trinkets and an apple by the time you were satisfied. As the throng of people moved, you let yourself be swept by the current. Your nimble fingers darted in and out, always fleeting touches—a coin purse off a man's hip, a bracelet from a woman's wrist. The villagers were too busy shuffling along to notice a five-foot-something pickpocket next to them in the crowd.

A gang of children, little thieves in training, you thought, slinking through the people with sticky, searching fingers. They're too young to be good at it, and the City Watchmen is quick to intervene. The kids would be sent to the stocks, or worse, have their tiny fingers sliced off, ensuring they would never steal again. No mercies were given for the scum of Flea Bottom.

A sharp pull on the hood of your cloak nearly makes you tumble backward. You turn, grabbing at the hand and squeezing tight, so they won't be able to run away. Instead of a skinny kid, you find yourself staring at a smirking face.

"You." Prince Aegon chuckles, shaking off your grip.

"Me," he responds, still with that dumb smirk. You grimace, crossing your arms as you catch the way he eyes your body.

"What are you doing here, my Prince," you mock the title, bowing as an added effect. "I would expect you to be knee-deep in whores at Madam's place by now." Aegon chortled, clapping your shoulder as he urged you forward along with the crowd.

"That was my plan, little one, but I would rather keep your company." He linked his arm with yours, placing his large hand over your smaller one. You scoffed but didn't protest as he led you in the opposite direction of the brothel. "If I may ask," he started, stroking the top of your fist, "what are you doing here, so far away from your home? It is not safe for a girl like you to be wandering the streets alone. You might encounter some unsavory individuals."

"I can handle myself, your grace. I have fared these sandstone streets and alleyways my whole life. I did not get the luxury of feather tick mattresses to dream on and goblets of wine to warm my throat." Aegon bellowed at your dig into his pampered life, nearly doubling over as he held his stomach. His breath smelled like he hadn't drunk water in days, which was probably true.

His laughter continued as you walked hand in hand. It was a loud, boisterous noise that seemed to stretch on for far too long. The villagers began to give both of you looks. You shifted uncomfortably, attempting to remove your hand from Aegon's arm, but he refused to let go, gripping your fingers until they turned white, still snickering.

"I am glad my impoverished upbringing entertains you, my Prince," you snapped, yanking your arm with enough force to be free finally.

He loved how you spoke his title like poison in your wet, pink mouth. It brought satisfaction that no Dornish wine or untouched virgin pussy could get him. Your words flowed through his ears and into his bones, sinking into the marrow and becoming the blood he needed to survive.

Aegon tucked a strand of hair that came to lose from the braided style you wore, staring as he traced his grimy fingertip through the patterns, disarming you with gentleness. You were beautiful, enchantingly dark eyes with purple staring back at him with parted lips. A soft, curious expression is painted on your face.

"You speak so eloquently for a girl of your station," he confessed, not thinking as your beauty mesmerized him. Your gentle face soon morphed back into a hardened one, insulted at his comment.

"I also seem to have all my teeth and keep my legs closed too. There are many things a girl of my station can possess," you said harshly.

Aegon felt his cock thump in his trousers, begging to spring free and find its place between your lips. He wondered what words you would say then-- what sounds you would make. He wanted to snuff out that fire within you but also stoke it. See how wild he could make the inferno until every single land of the Seven Kingdoms was ashes. Only then would he dampen it, place the cover over the yellow-orange flames with simple touches or sweet words, and then start the process once more.

"I meant no offense, my lady," he apologized, holding his hands up in surrender. You didn't give the dignity of a response, only humming as you turned your eyes forward.

***

Judging by the position of the sun setting in the west of Kings Landing, it was around seven in the evening, curfew only three hours into the future. Without realizing it, Aegon had led you back to Ma's place, stopping at the front entrance littered with giggling women and slurring men.

You had wandered the road and alleyways to the Streets of Silk, the different shopping districts, and back to Flea Bottom, talking mindlessly about anything and everything that slipped past your lips. 

Your image of Prince Aegon in your head was completely different than how he was. He was still a drunk, pampered palace boy who got whatever he wanted when he wanted, but there was something else there, too, behind the thick veil of impulsiveness he used as a disguise. To your surprise, he was thoughtful, polite, and observant. It was easy for the drunken prince to be written off as someone that wouldn't remember what you said moments prior, too self-absorbed in his cup to care. But they were wrong. It was unwise for people to believe that, which is why he knew so much about the people in court.

He knew that Lady Tyrell had taken on a female lover. That Cregan Stark hated the Hightowers with a burning passion rivaling Daemon Targaryen himself and that Lord Beesbury was allergic to bees. (The irony was not lost on you as you laughed until tears were in your eyes.) Aegon's affinity for making people feel like he wasn't significant enough to keep their secrets from him was astounding. You would think that the eldest-born son of King Viserys would be seen as more important than that. You wondered what his reputation was inside the Red Keep. His being a drunk was not a reason to have loose lips around him.

"This is our final destination, my lady. I wouldn't want your mother to cut my ear off, she seemed moments from it when I first met you a fortnight ago." He could only recall the streak of white in your hair as you hugged yourself to Madam at the time. You giggled, remembering the rage on Ma's face when she saw him talking to you, then remembering that same rage was directed at you not too long ago. 

Aegon smiled down at you, his breath no longer stinking of alcohol but of the sweet citrus blend of juice he had bought for the both of you. The pain was still fresh in your mind, the happy memories of today overshadowed by it. He took notice and gently turned you to face him, your eyes downcast in shame. 

You were beginning to cry and did not want him to see it-- see you so weak. You may have portrayed yourself as a strong, independent, blossoming young woman who could take care of her own needs, and to a point, you were, but you were still a girl. You needed Ma.

You sniffled, trying to move away from Aegon, but he held you firm, gripping your chin with his thumb and pointer finger.

"What is wrong, little one?" He asked sweetly, only making the salty tears spill more. "My pretty girl, please speak to me. Is it because you do not want our fun to end," he jested, though still concerned.

"No," you mumbled softly, shaking your head as your saliva turned to globs in your mouth. It took everything inside him not to kiss you right there.

"Then tell me, so I can mend it." Aegon sounded so sure of himself that he almost convinced you. He was so kind to you that you believed he would do anything you asked. Perhaps you could ask him to run in there and demand Ma to take you back. You probably could.

"I made a mistake," you said before collapsing into his body, hands clutching at his brown tunic.

Aegon felt his heart skip a beat when your short arms wrapped around his torso; his reaction was delayed as he did the same for you. He wanted to do so many things to you. He wanted to carry you to his quarters in the Red Keep and bed you. He wanted to steal that precious maidenhood of yours, watch the same tears flowing under him, but he could not.

For the first time in years, Aegon Targaryen showed restraint.

His arms were crushing you, but you didn't care. You welcomed the physical pain, focusing on that rather than the emotional.

"Ma hates me," the words began to leak from your mouth before you realized it. "She-she told me never to come back because... because..." A sob ripped from your chest, and you pressed into Aegon further, so you could feel him squeeze you tighter.

"Why does she hate you?" He questioned into your hair, inhaling the sweet scent of your sweat.

"Because I am a terrible daughter! Because I am a horrible person! Because I want to know my father! I am the child of a whore and a deadbeat." The people lining the entrance began to turn their heads at the pair of you, seeing the white-haired prince holding a young girl crying. They knew what that meant and kept to themselves. "I have lost the only people in the world who care about me." You knew you sounded childish, but you were too upset to care.

"You are not a bad person or terrible daughter. I do not believe that at all. Your intelligence and beauty are far more superior than any woman or man at court." His comforting words made you feel slightly better, happy to hear the affirmations you desperately needed finally. "Our time together, though it has been brief, has been the happiest moments of my life, and I have attended a New Year celebration with the Dothraki," Aegon boasted as he pinched your arse. You squealed, swatting at him as you tried to get away, chuckling.

Aegen let go of you, his arms trembling from how hard he squeezed you as he looked into those beautiful eyes again. He was still in a lust-filled drunken haze when he met you. The memory of you from a fortnight ago was very muddy. The more minor details of your body were forgotten. Oh, how the purple in them reminded him of his own, and the white streak woven into your hair was similar to his.

Oh...

How had he not seen this sooner when it was staring at him right in the face? It finally made sense, the sudden arrival of his Uncle. Aegon had thought it weird for Daemon to arrive without Rhaenyra and the rest of them unannounced and even more strange that he wanted to speak with his mother and Larys Strong. But now, it all made sense why his mother had looked so interested in his drunk rambling one dinner. Daemon had sired a bastard, and that was you.

He smiled to himself. It explained why you had that fire, why Aegon felt so drawn to you. You had the blood of the dragon coursing through your veins.

"Do not laugh at me, Aegon. It is not funny." You push him away, embarrassed that you have let yourself become so exposed in front of him.

"I am not laughing at you, little one," he said kindly, "I just thought of something that might make this all better." You snorted in disbelief and rubbed the tears away.

"What could possibly make this better?" You questioned skeptically as he grinned. His sweet words at done a great deal to help, but the pain was so raw and fresh that you needed a distraction.

"Accompany me tonight, my fair maiden," Aegon bowed deeply at the waist, extending his palm out, "and you shall find out." 

Smut? NO! Only fluff! Don't worry, we'll get to the debauchery in the next part. ;)

You let out a shakey breath, almost laughing as you took his hand. He kissed your knuckles, brushing them with his thumb as he led you into the humid darkness.

Thank you for reading!

Master List of Series

Tagged peeps: @zeennnnnnn, @malfoytargaryen, @targaryencore, @justasmallbean, @alexandra-001, @buckysmainhxe, @omgsuperstarg, @sommornyte, @minttea07, @silverslive, @unclecrunkle

[rezzyromance]

Oooo I had an idea- Moreau with a reader who is very cuddly n’ caring as well as very patient, but, once you make them mad, b o o m full angy creature mode. (Maybe someone makes fun of sal while testing the readers patience so they defend sal or something idk- (;^^)

This page is slowly turning into a Moreau fan page and I couldn't be anymore happier!!

You've been waiting patiently in the shack that you and Moreau stayed in together. He was called to another one of Mother Miranda's meetings along with the other Lords. As much as you'd like to join him for the meetings, him and the other Lords agreed that it would be safer for you if Miranda didn't know of your existence. Moreau understood the importance of keeping you a secret from his beloved "mother", but he failed to stay silent about you to the other Lords. He was just too proud and happy that he finally found someone who loved him like the people in the romance movies he watches love each other.

To try and make time pass by, you began to clean slightly. The shack was a bit messy when you first started living with him. Now, you like to help out and sweep from time to time. He also began to pick up after himself better, hoping to impress you. After sweeping for a while, you could hear movement in the distance. You look out the window to see Moreau returning from the meeting, his head hanging lower than usual.

"Hello love!", you call out to him from the window, waving to greet him. He glances at you and lifts his hand as a low effort way to respond. This wasn't usual for him. Usually he would greet you with open arms and a smiling face. Your heart began to sink slightly, worried about what may have caused him to seem so sad. Once he made it through the door of the shack, you walk over to him and place a hand on his cheek. "Is everything okay, Sal?", you ask him. You noticed how his cheeks were wet, streams of tears falling on each side. "Heeyyyy what's wrong?", you ask in a comforting voice, pulling him in for a hug. He doesn't hesitate to throw his arms around you and hugs you tightly. You could hear him sniffle as his crying continued. "Let's calm down for a sec and then you could tell me what happened, okay?", you ask him as you start to lead him to the couch. "..okay", he gives a quit answer as his sniffling continued.

Once you made it to the couch, you threw a large blanket over the both of you. You pulled him closer and wiped away his tears again. His breathing started to grow rapid as he tried to stifle his crying. You began to quietly comfort him, saying things like "I got you." and "You're okay.", as you held him close. His sniffling finally slowed to a stop and he seemed to be calm.

You pulled away from holding him and had your eyes meet with his. "Now.... what caused this?", you asked, wanting him to open up to you. He hesitated and looked away. "It's okay. It doesn't matter", he sighed. "C'mon Sal. It matters to me.", you say. "Well.... Angie called me ugly again..", he seemed embarrassed. "Ugh that piece of plastic? Can she even see with those marble eyes of hers? Obviously she doesn't see what I see.", Angie was a bit well known to be harsh with her words. It wasn't uncommon for her to say something rude about his appearance, but it also wasn't common for Moreau to be upset by her words. He was good at brushing off her harshness, so what else could be bother him. "..and.. Heisenberg laughed... and..", you could see the tears begin to pool in his eyes once more. You started rubbing his arm. "What else?", you push him to open up more. "He called me a moronic freak.... and said he doesn't understand how you.. love me and.. you use me to have a roof over your head..", he admitted.

You had stopped rubbing his arm. Your hand was now balled into a fist as rage began to boil inside of you like a volcano ready to explode. "Is that all?", you ask him, unaware of how aggressive your tone was. "Yes.. Mother split up the meeting after that and he laughed as he left..", he sulked. "You know that none of what he says is true right? You know damn well you deserve love more than his bastard ass. And you know I will not let him bully you like a child." he was caught off guard by your tone. Your jaw was clenched and your brow was furrowed. He was happy that Heisenberg's words weren't true, but he was worried about what his words may cost him.

"Where is he?", you ask as you stand up from the couch. "W-What?", Moreau stood up as well, unsure of what you were planning. "Where is Heisenberg? I need to...talk..to him.", you say. "He said he was going to visit the Duke and buy some stuff...", his hands anxiously began to fiddle with each other. "Take me to him. Lead me to where he is.", you demand. "I don't wanna make him mad!", he panicked. "Don't worry big guy. I'm just gonna talk to him a little bit.", you lie. You knew damn well you were going to do a little more than talk to him. "Okay..", he took a deep breath and began to walk and you followed.

There's never a good way to know exactly where the Duke is. He seems to pop up almost anywhere and always has exactly what you need. He did have a few specific spots that he would set up shop at though, and in one of those places is where you found him. You could see his carriage set up between a few trees on a trail. The Duke was discussing something with Heisenberg. "Ah (Y/N)! What can I offer you today?", the Duke asked once he saw you. Heisenberg looked over and smirked once he saw you with an anxious Moreau following.

"What's this? Did you snitch on me, Moreau?", he said with a cackle that followed. You never stopped walking, nearly marching, towards him. He was still laughing when you stood in front of him with little to no distance between the both of you. His laugh made you sick. So sick that you reeled your arm back and slapped the man across the face as hard as you could. His glasses flew off his face and landed in the snow and his laughing ceased. Moreau covered his mouth to muffle a gasp and the Duke did the same in hopes to muffle his chuckle. "Listen here you pretentious fuck.", you snap as your anger peaked. The man jerked his head to make eye contact with you. His gaze was sharp, but not sharp enough to cut away your rage. "How miserable do you have to be to get a kick out of acting like a bully on the school house playground? You have a lot of fucking guts for a man who dresses like he's living on the streets!" He leans in close to you to try and get you to react or budge. You don't move. "And you have a lot of fucking guts for someone who I can kill within seconds.", he threatens. You respond by slapping off his hat which had been poking your forehead. He grabbed you by the wrist and began to squeeze tightly. "Do you know who you're fucking with?", his breath hit your face. "Yeah, an ugly mother fucker.", you say as you kick him in the ankle. It didn't hurt, but he was shocked by your boldness and the way that you didn't even flinch. He knew you were aware of his powers, yet still you continued to taunt him and stand your ground all at once. You could tell he began to feel overwhelmed as his eyes looked around and his posture began to change. He knew he couldn't break you down. He took a deep breath and walked over to his glasses. When he bent down to pick them, you grabbed him by the back of his coat collar. You leaned in real close to his ear and whispered, "You better fucking believe me when I say I will fucking kill you if you ever make that man cry again. I don't give a damn if you're an oversized magnet. I'll rip you to fucking shreds if you even fucking look at him disrespectfully. Do you understand me?", you nearly spit in his ear. "Yes. I do.", he says as he rises up. You stand up straight as well, handing him his hat that you knocked off earlier. He takes it and looks over at Moreau and the Duke. Both of them had a smile on their faces, obviously enjoying the show they had witnessed. His whole body grew hot with embarrassment as he tried to act cool, putting on his hat and glasses. He gave a nod to the men and walked away.

"My, my, (Y/N). I've never seen anyone stand up to Lord Heisenberg like that. It was quite the sight.", he gave a guttural laugh. "What can I say? I won't stand for slander of any kind when it comes to him.", you motion over to Moreau who began to walk over. "Are you okay, (Y/N)?", he nervously placed his hand on your shoulder. "Absolutely. I made sure Heisenberg won't bother you ever again.", you say before placing a kiss on his forehead. This caused him to smile and wrap his arms around one of yours. "Well now that we're here, Duke do you happen to have any cheeses?", you ask. "I always come prepared for my loyal customers!", he says before handing over some type of exported cheese. You pull out the amount of Lie needed from your pockets and hand it over to the Duke.

The day ended with you both curled up on the couch in each others arms, watching a new romance movie neither one of you have seen, as Moreau enjoyed his new exported cheese. He couldn't stop smiling as he held you close. After today, he truly understood just how willing you were to fight for him.

[taelme]

Tattoo artist!Bang Chan

genre: tattoo artist!au, (fluff, slightly suggestive, this felt like slow burn to me lol) 

pairing/s:  Chan / Reader, ( some of the stray kids appear in this but not all sorry ) 

word count: 20k+ ( again, idk what happened my hand slipped ) 

tw: none!! just slightly suggestive but NO SMUT in this we keep it safe here bc im weak 

a/n: this was a ride....inspired by that one period of time ( PLS 191110 KAMP festival... ) Bang Chan kept wearing that fake lip piercing....n I love Bang Chan but like...I can't write smut for the life of me so this is the best I can do,... I put a mix in there I guess hope u guys like it!! ps gif not mine idk how many times I need to say this 

“Hi, welcome to peaches, what can I get you?”

You fumbled around in your bag for your wallet, looking up to make eye contact with the boy standing behind the counter, dark brown hair falling over his eyes slightly as he gave you an expectant look.

Taken aback by the sheer appeal of his looks, you avoided his gaze desperately, trying your best to calm yourself down as you wondered just why Felix wasn’t working today.

"Uh…I’ll just uh…I’ll get um. Can I have the peach thing?” you fumbled with your words, your hand going up to your head to scratch at your temple even though it wasn’t itching.

A small huff of laughter escaped the boy, your gaze darting up to look at him, somewhat curious to see what he would look like while laughing, but getting distracted by the shiny silver ring delicately hugging the corner of his lower lip, except this time you couldn’t bring yourself to look away.

“You mean the peach soda?” he quirked an eyebrow, giving you a small smirk.

You noticed a slight accent in the way he spoke, only serving to make you even more confused about just who he was, your mind wandering to possibilities on whether he was one of Felix’s friends from Australia.

Pursing your lips, you nodded quickly without paying attention to what he was asking you, trying to end your exchange quickly before your flushed skin became too obvious, thrusting your money forward and staring intently as he worked quickly at the register.

Holding the change out for you, you’d almost winced when the pads of your fingers brushed against the cool metal of his rings, hearing him thank you, mumbling something else that you couldn’t quite catch.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Name?” he prompted you again.

You made a sound of realization, remembering that this was your first time meeting him so he wouldn’t know your name, “Y/N,” you told him.

He made a small sound of intrigue, “nice name,” he murmured.

Thankfully you’d regained your sense of the situation before he could write your name on the cup, “wait, I’m not having it to-go,” you added quickly, not expecting to earn a chuckle from him.

“I know, sweetie, I asked you about that just know,” he raised his eyebrows at you, “I just wanted to know your name.”

Shoving your coins into your wallet, you thanked him quickly,  hastening your steps to find yourself a seat at the far corner of the room, away from the crowd of students playing board games but not too far away that your friend wouldn’t be able to spot you when they arrived.

Taking your phone out to pretend to fiddle with it, you couldn’t help the furtive ( you hoped, at least ) glances you stole at the said worker, your constant glances at him making you completely oblivious to what was actually going on around you, only snapping out of your thoughts with a start when you heard a loud thud on your table, your head snapping up quickly to spot your friend in the seat before you.

“Sorry I’m late. Did you wait long?” Jisung asked you, his hair in a mess from what you assumed was the cause of the thud.

“Huh?” you frowned, not hearing him quite well from how distracted you were, Jisung’s reply interrupted when you saw the cashier boy walking towards your table.

“Here’s your drink, sweetie,” he smiled, and in your desperation to avoid his gaze once again, you had noticed how only one of his hands was covered in a sleeve, something you knew people tended to do to cover tattoos.

You pretended you weren’t flustered, giving the boy a slight nod and looked elsewhere, fiddling with the straw in the soda, glaring at Jisung when he’d slid the glass from your hand slowly, raising both eyebrows in question while gesturing wildly with his head in the direction the cashier had walked off in.

“Who’s the hottie and why’s he calling you sweetie?” He wiggled his eyebrows, bringing the straw to his lips to take a long sip.

“Firstly, I want to know just as much as you do. Second of all, I don’t even know his name-”

“It’s Chris, I saw his nametag just now when you were too busy staring at God knows what,” Jisung rolled his eyes, leaning back in his seat to casually look at the counter, observing how Chris had brought a little juice box up to his mouth, fiddling with his phone as there were no customers in line.

“Why d’you think Felix suddenly hired him?” Jisung narrowed his eyes at Chris, making you shrug, wondering where Felix was, finding it oddly timely when Felix had chosen that time to enter the café, the bells dangling on top of the door jingling to announce his entrance. 


“He’s here, maybe we can just ask him,” you told Jisung, watching as Felix approached the counter with a wide grin.

Chris placed his phone down quickly, only to relax when he realised it was just Felix.

“Hey,” Felix nodded at Chris, turning to scan the room, waving at you and Jisung upon spotting the both of you.

Jisung waved his hand wildly to beckon Felix to your table, practically pulling him down into a squat next to your table, earning a wide-eyed look of confusion from Felix.

“Hi guys, everything alright?”

“Who is that! Your new hire!” Jisung used his head to nod in Chris’ direction, making Felix turn around in Chris’ direction before a knowing look washed over his face, his mouth curving into an ‘o’ shape, looking very much amused.

“I see you’ve met Chris?”

You nodded, “are you understaffed or something? I thought you said you don’t do part- timers?” You frowned.

Felix shook his head, jutting his lips out in a pout.

“Nope, I’ve been pretty busy these days with classes so I figured I could use some help, plus, he’s a friend of mine so I know I can trust him.” Felix grinned, holding his hands up beside his face in a thumbs up.

“He looks really….” You began, immediately regretting because you were struggling to find the right word to describe Chris’ intimidating aura.

Truth be told, you were just trying not to let how good-looking you thought he was slip. Jisung would surely never let you live it down.

“Scary? Yeah I figured, my parents told me to get him to cover his tattoos so he wouldn’t scare my customers off,” Felix giggled, “but the lip piercing was a little troublesome so I let him keep it on,” he shrugged, your eyes widening at the confirmation that he did indeed have tattoos.

“Trust me….his face is scary enough for that,” you muttered, taking a long sip of your drink in your poor attempt to suppress your curiosity.

Jisung shot you a look, rolling his eyes.

“Please, that ‘sweetie’ he gave you was far from scary and you know it.”

Felix raised an eyebrow at Jisung, turning to give you an amused smile, his hands coming up to cover his mouth (though that didn’t do much in hiding his grin).

“‘Sweetie’?” He giggled, peering over at Chris before shaking his head good-naturedly.

“Yeah, you know, you should tell him not to flirt with your customers,” you huffed, Jisung’s smirk already beginning to unnerve you.

Felix’s response had only unnerved you even more, “trust me, Y/N, he’ll grow on you.”

===

And grow on you he sure did. Though you weren’t very sure if you would liken him to the kind of unwelcome moss that grows on old buildings or that of a pretty morning glory plant. Though both had its own charm, you just weren’t sure which one Chris fit into. Whatever it was, you were sure he was leaning towards the more unwelcome one for you.

You shot an annoyed look at Chris when he’d turned whatever rave music he had been playing in the café even louder, interrupting the cute café project meeting you were attempting to have with one of your friends Jeongin.

“What? Sorry, I can’t concentrate with all...this,” Jeongin gave you an apologetic frown, using his hand to gesture to the speakers, making you turn to cast Chris an angry glare.

Catching his gaze quickly, he gave you an expectant look, which only served to unnerve you more with how nonchalant he was acting.

“The music” you mouthed, gesturing to the speakers, “is too loud!” you covered your ears and shook your head vigorously, repeating your gestures with your frown directed towards him.

Chris simply shrugged, even going to the extent of pretending to yawn, cupping his hand around his ear and knitting his eyebrows together in a wince.

Curse Felix for having cute asshole friends, you thought.

Frankly, Chris didn’t know why he was being such an ass either. Maybe it was the knowledge that that kid sitting with you was interacting with you more than you ever interacted with Chris. Or maybe it was the way you seemed like you’d dressed up more today, fiddled with your hair more and posed for pictures nicely compared to when you were with Jisung.

Maybe Chris was just a teensy weensy bit jealous.

“I’m really sorry, he doesn’t seem like he’s gonna lower down the volume anytime soon,” you leaned closer to apologize, slightly reassured when he shook his head dismissively at you, though it didn’t rid you completely of your guilt.

“I don’t know why he’s doing this,” you explained further, “I brought you here because the music he usually plays is really good,” you explained.

“It’s really fine, he looks like the kind of guy I wouldn’t mess with either...it’s okay.” Jeongin glanced at Chris’ direction furtively, Chris’ sickly sweet smile seeming to intimidate him.

You scoffed at the way Chris had smiled at Jeongin, turning to give him another apologetic frown.

“I’m so sorry, I know you wanted to discuss our project today...but maybe we can go somewhere more conducive next time?” you tried to sound more hopeful, huffing a sigh of relief when you’d seen him nod reassuringly.

Jeongin had bid you goodbye once he’d decided he had received one too many of Chris’ intense stares, making you free to storm over to the counter, hands on your hips to emphasize your dismay.

Only then did Chris decide to lower down the music volume, turning back to face you with an expectant smile as you heard a calmer michael bublé song playing softly through the speakers.

“What’s your deal, Chan?” you frowned, your fingers finding purchase on the hem of your shirt, telling yourself to stand firm! And Don’t let his dimples sway you!

“I’ve told you a thousand times, you can call me ‘Chan’,” there was an amused lilt to his tone, though he figured you weren’t going to repeat yourself with how firmly you were staring at him.

“What deal?” he murmured pensively, bringing a hand up to fiddle with his lip ring and tilting his head at you so casually that you wondered if teasing people just came naturally to him.

"What’s my deal?” you echoed his question in disbelief, “I couldn’t even hear myself think with how loud the music was just now!” you huffed, your frown only deepening when he looked at you apologetically.

“Sorry, sweetie, couldn’t hear you just now. The other customers felt like the music was too soft,” he pouted, something in his expression making you less upset despite how obviously he was lying.

You’d opened your mouth to retort but fell short of coming up with a good enough comeback, choosing to scoff at him instead.

“You’re really manipulative, you know that?“ you huffed, poking your tongue in your cheek and looking down at the menu on the counter (even though you already knew what you were going to order).

"So….I’ll get you your usual, then?” and apparently, so did he.

Determined not to let yourself get more affected by Chan, and even more determined on not mentioning him for the rest of the duration that you would be at peaches, you buried yourself in your reading, flipping your pages so roughly you had to stop every now and then to check if they tore.

Jisung had joined you halfway, when you had switched from angry-reading to slouching in your seat scrolling through social media.

Shoving his phone on top of your (now closed) books with a loud thump, you leaned forward, peering over your phone to see different drawings and designs on the screen, all in black and white.

“That’s nice, did you draw it?” you asked, pinching and pulling at the screen to zoom on the details of the designs.

Jisung snorted, giving you an all-too-satisfied smile, "my dear friend, I’m thinking of getting a tattoo.”

Your eyes widened, “tattoo? Your mom would murder you,” you scoffed.

Jisung shook his head proudly, his eyes wide and insistent, “that’s where you’re wrong.” He smiled proudly, “I asked her already and she’s fine with it as long as I find someone legit to do it.”

Your eyebrows raised, fairly impressed that he had gotten away with it.

“But she’s not paying for it, of course,” he added as an afterthought.

You hated how predictable you were, but at the mention of tattoos, your gaze had wandered over to Chan, who was busy placing a few orders together on a tray. Staring at his sleeve, you figured, he seems like the type that would know about tattoos…right? I mean, considering he has a few of his own.

Don’t say it. don’t say it. don’t say it.

“Maybe you can ask Chan?” you’d winced as the words left your lips, “I mean, he has tattoos, right? Seems like he knows what he’s doing,” you offered, closing your mouth quickly as you saw him approaching your table.

“Oh yeah! Why didn’t I think of that?” Jisung clapped his hands, head snapping around and startling in his seat when Chan had made his presence known.

“Here you go,” he murmured, pushing your peach soda towards you before turning to Jisung, hugging his tray to his chest, “hey, man. Anything for you today?”

Jisung shook his head, “actually I was wondering, you have tattoos, right?”

You had to refrain from making your embarrassment too obvious, pulling the straw of your drink to your lips to feign disinterest in Chan’s response. Your sips only grew longer when Chan leaned his free hand on the back of your chair, his torso next to your head. Since when did his perfume smell so good?

“Yeah,” he replied confidently, shaking his head slightly to get his hair away from his eyes.

“Do you know anywhere I could get something done? Not anywhere shady, of course,” he asked Chan.

Chan let out a giggle, nodding. “Gimme a sec,” he held his hand up in a signal for Jisung to wait, jogging over to the counter and pulling his backpack out from under the counter, fishing something out before jogging back to your table.

Holding his hand out, he showed the both of you two small palm-sized cards. Taking it from him, you realized that they were business cards.

“This is actually my studio...” he shifted his weight from one leg to the other, folding his arms across his chest around the tray, “I’m like...certified and all, so you don’t have to worry,” he told Jisung.

“But you can check it out first if you’re still unsure. If not I can just find someone else to help you,” he added, gesturing as he spoke.

“Cool,” you murmured, gripping the card tightly between your fingers, making a mental note to do some research on this ship once Chan left.

“Alright, man, thanks so much. I’ll let you know.”

Chan smiled at Jisung, patting him on the back lightly before going off to clear the other tables.

“Says here they have an Instagram,” Jisung murmured, scrutinising the card closely.

Telling you the name of the account, you pulled up a page of the shop, your mouth falling open in shock at the number of people he had following the account, not to mention the number of pictures of peoples tattoos on the account. Starting to scroll through the account’s posts, you realized most if not all of his designs were in black and white.

“Do you want your tattoo to have colour? Cause if you do..I don’t think he really does many colour pieces,” you murmured, angling your phone to face him so he could look at the designs with you.

“Honestly...I might just do one of his designs…they’re a lot nicer than whatever I had in mind,” you laughed at the way he stared blankly at your phone screen.

“Do they tag the people who get the tattoos?” You wondered out loud.

Jisung reached over to tap on the picture, tapping on the account only to be led to what you were very sure was Chan’s account.

You shamelessly scanned the account, noticing he rarely posted photos of himself but mostly of the sky or of scenery (with the occasional post-workout photo), and that there were a little to no actual coloured photos in his feed.

“Are you gonna follow him?” You asked Jisung, seeing him nod and give you a shrug.

“Yeah, why not?” he raised his eyebrows in question as if you were asking a stupid question.

“Follow him with me, so it doesn’t seem like I’m trying to kiss ass or anything,” he tapped on your arm incessantly, tapping on his phone before dragging your hand closer to him so he could press the follow button on Chan’s account.

“Jisung!” You pulled your phone away quickly, looking at him with wide eyes, making his eyes widen as well, looking at you in surprise.

“What? What?”

“I didn’t know you were gonna follow him now! He’s literally right there,” you whispered harshly at him.

Casting you an unamused glance, he held his hands up in a shrug.

“It’s no big deal. He probably won’t even think much of it…. I mean, well…unless you want him to,” his expression turned to a more teasing one, narrowing his eyes at you as he traced a heart in the air with his fingers.

“Oh yeah, speaking of which, I was meaning to ask you, how did your meetup with Jeongin go?” he placed his phone back down on the table, looking at you expectantly.

“Bad,” you groaned, “Couldn’t even hear him half the time because someone was playing the cafe music too loud,” you nodded your head in Chan’s direction.

Jisung winced, “So you guys didn’t get to discuss?”

You shook your head, “I told him we could just meet somewhere more conducive the next time since clearly Chan had a problem hearing me,” you sighed, leaning back in your seat.

“But the music’s fine now, though?”

“Well it wasn’t fine just now, and the dumbest part was that he turned it down after Jeongin left,” you rolled your eyes, knowing that the brown haired boy had no idea you were talking about him as he stood there sipping on his stupid juice box.

“Maybe he did it on purpose,” Jisung offered, making you scoff.

“Beats me, but whatever it is it’s crazy.”

“You’re just mad ‘cause he’s cute.”

You scoffed, huffing at him in disbelief, “no, I’m mad because he ruined my meeting,” your eyes widened in offence.

Jisung narrowed his eyes, letting his imagination run wild, “maybe he wanted to ruin your date,” he conspired, making you roll your eyes.

“One,” you held up a finger, “it wasn’t a date. Two,” you lowered your hand, struggling to find another reason, “you watch too many dramas,” you finally mustered, only serving to fuel Jisung’s entertainment even more.

“It’s easy, Y/N, the next step is to just… slide into his dms, I mean, since you’re already following him.”

You tossed your packet of tissue at him, “shut up, Jisung.”

That same night, you were about to sleep when you’d received a message.

Jisung

1:39am - r we placing bets on whether he’s trying to thirst trap me –

Attached to the message was a screenshot of Chan’s Instagram page with a selfie that he’d just uploaded, the picture showing Chan’s exposed collarbones and above making your eyes widen and close the image quickly, feeling your cheeks redden at the sudden post, unsure why a simple photo of him was making you flustered to no end.

1:41am -probably-

Was all you could type out, debating in your head whether to open the image again, a part of you wanting to see it again but shaking your head decisively, shoving your phone back underneath your pillow, but the image of Chan with damp hair wearing coloured contacts burned in your head.

You found yourself growing more anxious about possibly seeing Chan the next day if you were going to the book cafe (which you probably were). But Jisung’s reply had you thinking that maybe it was the universe trying to shove and kick you towards Chan.

Jisung


1:42am - also ive decided n u are coming w me to his shop to get my tat tmr -

You sighed, casually scrolling up in your chat to have a look at Chan’s selfie again before typing out your reply to Jisung.

1:42am -lovely-

Shoving your phone aside, you closed your eyes, hoping the feeling of yourself being drawn to the image would go away quickly.

===

“Do you even know where the shop is? we’ve been walking for hours,” you whined, earning an eye roll from Jisung who was still faithfully following the google maps directions on his phone.

“First of all, it’s only been 10 minutes. Second of all, I know where it is, look,” he showed you his phone, the automated voice telling him he was about to reach his destination, “ms google says we’re really close by.”

“Okay, fine. Just hurry, I wanna sit down.” you sighed, letting Jisung lead you to a stretch of modern cafés, eventually ending up in front of a neon sign of what looked like a little cartoon snake, the cartoon logo fairly familiar after remembering seeing it on Chan’s Instagram.

Shoving the glass open, you heard small bells identical to those in the cafe signal your entrance. A tall, baby-faced boy wearing thin-rimmed glasses walking out from behind the curtains leading to the back. This boy had piercings too, but the skin exposed by his t-shirt was clean, not marked by any sort of tattoo, giving him a much more innocent appearance as compared to Chan.

“Hey, uh…I booked an appointment here for 2pm?” Jisung spoke, and the tall boy stalked over to their reception area wordlessly, going behind the counter to pull out a thick binder and flipping to the most recent page.

“With Chan?” the boy spoke, earning a nod from you. “Alright. I’m Hyunjin, by the way. Will both of you be getting tattoos?”

Your eyes widened, rushing to protest, “oh, no, no no. Not me, just him. I’m just moral support.” You clarified, earning a snicker from Hyunjin, who nodded in amusement.

“Okay, then,” he shut the binder with a light thud, “Chan’s just finishing up a phone call with another client. He’ll call you when he’s ready but in the meantime you guys can chill here, I guess.” he gestured to the small black leather sofas in the reception area.

You and Jisung did as you were told, the waiting making Jisung more nervous about the nitty gritty details of getting a tattoo.

“Here’s the forms to fill up while you wait,” Hyunjin walked over to pass an electronic tablet to Jisung.

You on the other hand, picked up a binder showing the various designs that the shop had specially come up with that people could choose, showing Jisung a new design every now and then to try to distract him from his nervousness.

“Hey look at this one, this is cute,” you pointed at a cartoon drawing of a kangaroo, flipping to the last page to see that they had pictures and the names of various piercings as well.

Jisung sighed, tone emotionless, “yeah, sure.”

Scrolling through the pictures absently, Jisung leant his head on your shoulder, looking at the binder’s contents with you.

“What about this?” Jisung joked, pointing at the lip piercing, “you could twin with Chan,” he snickered.

You rolled your eyes, “yeah, very funny.”

Sighing, you thought about how Chan looked with the lip piercing, “his lips are really nice…” Your voice trailed off, only realising what you said after. “I mean like, I’m not saying that with any double meaning or whatever I just mean like, you know, generally he has a nice lip shape and a—”

“Yeah save it, we know you have the hots for him.”

You huffed, ignoring Jisung and continuing to flip the pages.

“Wait stop, that one’s nice. I think you’d look good with this one,” he pointed at the picture of the helix piercing.

"This?” you brought your hand up to touch your ear where the piercing would be, “but this is like….the hard part of my ear, won’t it hurt?” you grimaced.

Jisung gave you a look, “c’mon, trust me, I think you’d look great in this….” Jisung lowered his voice, leaning closer to you and glancing at Hyunjin to make sure he wasn’t listening.

“Chan would lose his shit.”

You smacked the binder closed, glaring at Jisung. Holding the binder up threateningly, about to scold him when you heard the beaded curtains move, your head snapping around to spot Chan there, dressed in a black muscle tee and black jeans, dark hair messy on his head.

“Hey guys, Jisung you ready? I’ve already done the stencil so it’s your call,” you waited for Jisung’s answer, too busy gawking at Chan’s tattoo sleeve, now being the first time you weren’t seeing it covered.

Jisung let out a loud sigh, “lemme just go inside and mentally prepare myself first,” he stood up, shaking his head.

Chan held the beaded curtain open for Jisung, letting him walk through first as you took your time to gather your things, not realizing Chan was still holding the curtain open for you.

“Hey, sweetie.” Chan greeted, nodding his head at you with a small smile.

“Hi,” you murmured, suddenly nervous around him, about to sling Jisung’s bag over your shoulder when Chan’s voice cut in.

“Oh, you can actually just leave it here. Hyunjin’ll be here,” you glanced at the boy mentioned who nodded at you before going back to his handphone game.

“Oh, alright then,” you murmured, walking over to where he was.

“I see you’re playing the moral support role today?” Chan let out a small giggle, letting you walk through the curtain before following behind you.

You let out a huff of laughter at the sight of Jisung lying on the chair with his eyes closed, hands clasped as if in prayer.

“Didn’t really have a choice,” you laughed, earning a grim nod from Chan, who put on his gloves and lightly kicked his stool towards the chair Jisung was seated on.

The first thing you noticed about the room was that it was very neat, everything seeming as though it was in its rightful place, giving off a very clean feel to the room, which served to calm you down for some reason. The plants and warm lighting in the room served to add some comfort to the atmosphere.

“Dude, don’t look so deathly, you’re not gonna die. You can take breaks in between if it’s too much,” Chan’s tone was reassuring, which you were thankful for since Jisung really did look pale.

“Okay, you’re right. You know what? I’m not that weak, I can do this,” his eyes shot open, giving Chan a firm nod.

Chan shocked you by giggling, gesturing to a wheeled stool similar to his, “you don’t have to stand, sweetie, you can sit here. This might take a while.”

If you were embarrassed, you didn’t show it, as you padded over to the stool, going next to Jisung and feeling him grab your hand. For a second you were thankful he was so nervous that he couldn’t tease you for Chan’s term of endearment.

Chan had disinfected the area Jisung wanted the tattoo on, a blueish outline of the design transferring onto his skin before he’d started. You appreciated how patient and precise Chan had been to speed up the process, Jisung occasionally squeezing your hand when it hurt.

“How long is this gonna take?” you asked out of curiosity.

“Uhh… this isn’t that big of a piece, so about 2-3 hours? Give and take if he needs breaks in between.”

“So, uh….how long have you been doing this?” you made conversation, the buzzing sound of the tattoo needle growing too loud for your comfort.

Chan’s eyebrows raised, lower lips jutting out in a pout as he thought. “I would say…professionally about 3 years so far?” Your eyebrows raised.

“Started when I was 15,” you furrowed your eyebrows.

“Wait, so you’re 19?” Jisung huffed, almost moving to sit up when he was temporarily distracted by the discovery.

Chan huffed, shaking his head, “don’t move, please. But to answer your question, no. I’m not 19. I started my apprenticeship at 15…” he trailed off, tongue darting out to wet his lips as he concentrated on a particular spot of the tattoo.

Sighing, he leaned back slightly to dab at the perspiration on his temples with his arm, making you tempted to take the cloth and do it for him, “I’m 22.”

Your eyes widened, feeling Jisung squeeze your hand for what you knew wasn’t pain.

“Oh,” you murmured, unsure what Jisung’s little reaction meant.

Chan hummed, “Yeah, Jisung mentioned that you guys were entering uni soon,” he stated, earning an affirmative nod from you.

“Yeah, we’re turning 20 soon,” Jisung murmured, eyes open now, seeming to have adjusted to the pain level.

Now it was Chan’s turn to be surprised. “Interesting,” he murmured.

“Uh-huh” Jisung spoke, and the way his tone sounded was making you nervous, not knowing what nonsense he was about to spout next. “Y/N’s already so old and still doesn’t have a boyfriend.”

Chan flushed at the implication, hoping his shyness wasn’t too obvious. Meanwhile you were trying to convince yourself that you weren’t imagining the pink tint growing more obvious on Chan’s ears.

"Nothing to be ashamed of,” Chan mustered after a short silence, his volume dropping considerably, “I mean, I’m older than you, and at this point of time I’m not dating either.”

Jisung struggled to contain his excitement, thinking of ways that he could get you and Chan alone together, coming up with what he would deem to be the most brilliant idea.

“Hey, Chan. Do you guys do piercings here too?”

“Aren’t you a little too talkative for someone in pain,” you muttered through gritted teeth, shooting a glare at Jisung—which he promptly ignored.

Chan smiled, tilting his head in question, “you’re not even done with your tattoo and you’re already thinking about piercings?” he laughed.

“Not for me, man, for Y/N.”

Chan made a surprised sound, taking his lower lip between his teeth as he focused on a particular part of Jisung’s tattoo, leaning back with a small sigh, “oh, is that so? what kind?”

“Uh…you know the helix one?” you murmured, your hand unconsciously going up to your ear to fidget.

Chan hummed, “yeah, I can do that. You’ve already made up your mind?” You nodded, before realizing he couldn’t see you.

“I guess…will it hurt, though?”

Chan leaned back, shrugging, “Depends, a tiny bit more than your average piercing?”

“Oh…well, then, I guess that doesn’t sound so bad,” you murmured.

Jisung grinned at you, which went unnoticed by Chan, who spoke seriously, filled with concern for your friend, “you’re doing really great, by the way. We’ll probably be done a lot earlier than expected. Just let me do the finishing touches and you’ll be free.”

You fiddled with Jisung’s fingers for the rest of the duration, trying not to be too obvious when you stared at Chan. How his eyebrows would furrow just ever so slightly in his concentration, his tongue peeking out to wet his lips or play with his piercing when he was filling in the shading for Jisung’s tattoo.

Just as the waiting was starting to get even a little unbearable, your leg beginning to bounce restlessly, you saw Chan lean back, a satisfied smile on his face.

“All done,” he smiled, patting Jisung on the shoulder with one hand as he set his equipment aside, taking some cling wrap and wrapping it around Jisung’s wrist.

Releasing a relieved sigh, you silently thanked the heavens that it was over because you really needed to pee.

You’d excused yourself to the washroom as Chan told Jisung about the aftercare tips, coming back to see that Jisung had already paid for his tattoo.

“So uh..” you saw Chan leaning against the doorframe with one hand shoved into his pocket, a few strands of the beaded curtain draped over his shoulder which he fiddled with, “you still up for the piercing? Or would you rather come back another day?” He asked you, bringing a hand up to push his hair out of his forehead, his hair falling back against his forehead gently.

You hummed, taking your phone out to see if you would have any other free periods during this week, realising that the only big period of rest you would have this week would be now, and you figured you would rather adjust to the new piercing over the weekend instead of in the middle of the week.

“Yeah, I guess I’ll just do it today,” you shrugged, glancing at Hyunjin who was eyeing Chan suspiciously, finding the boy’s behaviour to be a little out of the ordinary.

“Cool, I’ll be in the back…just uh… come in and let me know when you’re ready,” he gave you a soft smile, the metal of his lip ring shining as it caught the light in the room.

“Have fun,” Jisung waggled his eyebrows at you once Chan went back, making you frown at him.

“What do you mean ‘have fun’? You’re staying with me,” your expression turned grim when you saw the way he was poorly stifling his laughter, “aren’t you?”

Jisung sucked in a sharp breath, grimacing, “yeah…about that…I actually have to go meet my group mates for something, but you’ll be fine,” he waved a hand at you dismissively, already beginning to backtrack out of the studio.

“Think of it as more time spent with Chan,” Jisung wiggled his eyebrows teasingly, turning quickly to leave the shop, leaving you dumbfounded in your place.

Turning around, you caught Hyunjin’s gaze, seeing the boy narrow his eyes at you, “are you and….Chan….you know…?”

You furrowed your eyebrows, your lips parting upon realising what he meant, shaking your head and waving your hands dismissively.

“Oh my god, no, really.”

Hyunjin raised an eyebrow at you, making you even more flustered that he was acting like he knew something you didn’t.

“No, seriously, nothing’s up. Stop looking at me like that.”

You quickened your footsteps in heading to the backroom, your cheeks flushed and eyes wide as you spotted Chan sitting on his stool, using his phone before looking up when you entered the room, a soft smile appearing on his face.

How can someone who smiles like this be the same person behind that selfie last night, you wondered.

“Ji..sung?” Chan’s voice trailed off, raising his eyebrows in question, setting his phone down on the counter attached to the wall.

“Oh, he actually just left…he had to meet his group members,” you murmured, gesturing outside.

Chan got up from his seat with a small grunt, walking over to you, making you confused as to why he was suddenly walking towards you.

You’d let out a confused hum, your voice coming out softer than intended, watching with wide eyes as he brought his hands up to yours, sighing in relief when he’d simply taken your bag and jacket from you.

“You can just take a seat on the chair if you want, but don’t recline it just sit on the seat,” he instructed, and you did as such, swinging your legs as they hung from the chair, the toe of your shoe grazing the tiled floor occasionally.

“Are you nervous?” He asked, bringing the various equipment he needed on the trolley, rolling it noisily over to where you were.

You nodded, making him laugh.

“Good.”

“Good? Isn’t it bad if I’m too stressed?” Your confusion was evident in your tone, making him shake his head at you.

Chan smiled, “it’s better to be nervous than over confident when it comes to these things.”

He took a new pair of gloves from the box, picking up a mirror from the tray and passing it to you, “hold this for me, hmm?”

Taking the disinfectant wipes, he pushed your hair aside, the constant falling of your hair making him giggle, “sorry can I just uh,” he shifted so he was standing behind you, bunching your hair into a ponytail, his hands brushing against the skin of your neck when he gathered the hair, almost making you shiver.

Securing it with the hairband around his wrist, he looked at you from the front, nodding at his handiwork.

“Sorry,” Chan added as an afterthought, “hope you don’t mind.” He put on his gloves, the metal of his bracelet peeking out from under the latex.

You shook your head, quietly observing his actions through his reflection in the mirror out of sheer anxiousness. Watching carefully as he held your ear with his first two fingers, disinfecting the area of your ear before picking up the marker.

Chan had crouched down slightly, pursing his lips in concentration as he made a tiny dot with the marker on your ear, leaning back so you could have a better look.

“Is this placement okay?” he asked, earning a nod from you.

“Great,” he gave you a close lipped smile, dimples appearing on his cheeks, “wow your ears are really red,” he commented with a laugh.

Laughing half-heartedly in reply, you shrugged, “think it’s cause of the air conditioning,” you lied, not knowing he would take you seriously, walking over to where he’d put your things and grabbing your jacket with his elbows, dropping it onto your lap.

“Sorry, it’d be a lot less awkward if I could use my hands,” he laughed, and you weren’t able to keep yourself from smiling.

After he’d prepared the needle and the studs, you tried not to let your tension be too obvious when he leaned down so he could be more precise. Funnily enough, though you were about to get a piercing, you were less nervous for that as compared to the fact that Chan was so close to you.

“Are you excited to graduate?” he asked you in an attempt to distract you, earning a shrug from you.

“I guess,” you murmured, Chan having successfully directed your attention elsewhere, “a little scared, though.”

“Of?” he asked, his gentle tone prompting you to elaborate.

“I guess I’m not really like…scared, I’m just kind of anxious? like…I don’t really know what to expect,” you laughed, earning a confused sound from him.

“Well if you think about it like that, then of course it’ll be negative,” Chan laughed.

“I mean, I wouldn’t know what it’s like because I didn’t go to uni but you know….maybe if you think of it as like a...i’m doing this so that I can do this in the future kind of thing then it’d be more exciting than scary,” Chan offered, moving to your other ear.

“Well…I guess that’s true,” you murmured, about to continue when you’d felt the needle piercing your skin, letting out a yelp, your hands unconsciously finding purchase on the closest thing to you, which (unfortunately and fortunately for you) was his torso, “why didn’t you give me any warning!” You hissed.

"Too late for a countdown now, huh,” he shrugged, fitting the stud onto your ear.

“All done,” he giggled, stepping away from you to set the needle into a tray for cleaning.

“You know what to do, right? Like…to care for your piercing?” Chan asked you, earning a nod from you.

“So, I’m done here?” You asked, watching Chan as he set his things aside to be sterilized, glancing at the clock on the wall at the side of the room.

“Pretty much,” he hummed, bringing up a hand to adjust his hair.

You hated how much the tension in the room was building, as if the both of you were just holding back on what you’d wanted to say. Almost deciding to walk out before Chan had finally spoken up.

“Are you gonna get dinner with Jisung?” he asked, looking elsewhere and pretending to be busy with throwing his gloves away.

“Nope,” you walked over to where he’d placed your bag, slinging it over your shoulder and taking your phone out to tell Jisung you were done getting the piercing.

“I’m probably just gonna go home and order in, or something,” you murmured, slightly preoccupied with texting to notice the way he’d perked up at the sound of you being free for the evening.

Chan walked through the curtains to the main reception area, leaning over Hyunjin who was sitting at the desk, fishing the tablet for you to fill in the form, murmuring a soft ‘sorry’ to Hyunjin, who was busy playing his phone games.

“Shouldn’t you have given that before she got the piercing,” Hyunjin whispered pointedly, his words going ignored by Chan, who knew very well that he was flustered into forgetting that small detail.

“Just fill these up and you’re all set,” he pushed them over the counter towards you, and you’d typed your details in quickly, eager to get Hyunjin’s suspicious gaze off of you.

“How much do I have to pay you?” You asked, getting ready to fish your wallet from your bag, confused when you heard Chan make a strangled sound of protest.

“Oh, no, it’s fine. Consider it ‘on the house’,” he told you, making Hyunjin’s eyebrows raise in question.

“What? But why? I mean, your shop is doing pretty well, services like that would probably be really expensive, right?” You gripped your wallet tighter, however he didn’t seem like he was giving you an option. Not with the way he was looking at you, that was for sure.

Hyunjin had ended his game already, nudging his glasses higher on his nose bridge. He pressed his lips in a thin, firm line, hoping it would help him stifle his laughter as you continued.

“But I can’t just let you do that, I mean, this is your business, you’d lose a lot of money if you just give people free services like this, you know?”

Chan almost snorted, “trust me, I won’t.”

You wracked your brain for other options on how to persuade him, “okay, but there has to be some other way I can repay you,” you stated, not expecting Chan to reply so quickly.

“How does grabbing dinner with me now sound?” The words flowed from his lips so naturally that even Hyunjin was surprised, not used to seeing his usually shy friend act so confidently around people.

Hyunjin let a small giggle escape him, narrowing his eyes at Chan who had kicked at his chair as a silent threat.

You opened your mouth and closed it back, unable to form a response in your shock, “uh…I um…” you fumbled to find the right words, making Chan let out the tiniest giggle.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” he assured you, “I’m just offering, you know...since you said just now that you wouldn’t have dinner at home anyway,” he gestured with his hands as he spoke, the silver chain around his wrist coming to your attention as he moved his hands around.

“No, no..uh,” you swallowed, clearing your throat softly, “yes? Yes, that sounds great, Chan,” you mustered out as confidently as you could.

“Cool, meet you outside, then? Lemme just go and grab my stuff,” he flashed you a small close-lipped smile before walking to the back.

“Bye?” You murmured to Hyunjin, who turned his narrowed eyes away from Chan to direct them towards you instead.

“I swear...there’s definitely something going on with you two…” Hyunjin muttered, tapping at his phone quickly before shaking his head abruptly, “never mind, I won’t harass you about it….yet. Have a good dinner,” his expression changed to a smiling one, waving at you as if nothing happened.

When you’d gone out of the tattoo shop, you only had to wait for barely a minute before you heard the door open behind you, Chan stepping out, now wearing a black leather jacket over his shirt with his bag in hand.

“Did you have any dinner place in mind?” You asked him, seeing him nod.

“Do you like tacos?”

===

“So, how come you’re working at peaches if you already have that whole setup at your tattoo studio?” You’d asked him during your dinner. You’d both already finished eating but were in no rush to leave, sipping your drinks slowly as an excuse to talk more.

“Felix told me he was looking for someone who could fill in for him part-time for whenever he had to go for classes, so I offered, since I don’t usually take appointments in the morning,” he explained, sipping his drink, fiddling with the straw between his thumb and index finger as he spoke.

“So you work in the afternoon?” he nodded.

“I work from around twelve to seven,” he told you casually, and at the mention of time you’d glanced at your phone, realising it was way before seven when he’d asked you to eat dinner with him.

Your eyebrows furrowed, “wait, then doesn’t that mean that you left work before you were supposed to?”

Chan’s eyes widened momentarily, bringing the straw to his lips ever so slowly, giving you a shrug in feigned nonchalance. “Nope,” he told you calmly, “I leave after my clients are done for the day, and I usually take 1 client a day.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, “are you lying right now?” you pretended to disapprove, since you knew you were past the point of saying you didn’t enjoy spending time with Chan.

Chan simply grinned, your heart skipping a beat at the sight of his dimples, hearing him let out an exaggerated sigh, “depends.”

He rest his chin on one of his hands, his fingers going up to fiddle with his lip piercing, only now coming to your notice that he’d changed the jewellery to a bigger silver ring.

“Does that hurt?” you asked, curiosity getting the better of you, making him gesture with his finger to his lips, earning a nod from you.

“Nope,” he said, popping the ‘p’, “I’ve had it for really long so you can like press or tug on it or whatever but it won’t hurt,” he said, his wording making your imagination wander, ears tinting red as you tried to dismiss the thoughts of kissing Chan that popped into your head.

“Your ears are red again,” he pointed out, an amused lilt to his tone, knowing exactly why.

In your distress, you tugged his hair tie off your hair, adjusting your hair so it would cover your ears, narrowing your eyes at him.

“It’s only ‘cause you said it like that,” you huffed.

“Like what?” he raised an eyebrow at you, feigning innocence as he continued, “all I meant was if I pull on it like this it won’t hurt…” he demonstrated by using his index finger and thumb to fiddle with his piercing.

“Unless, that wasn’t what you were thinking?” he teased, leaning closer to you over the table.

You got up abruptly, “we should get going,” you diverted the topic quickly, ignoring Chan’s laughter behind you as you made your way to pay the bill, managing to do so successfully before Chan had made it to the register, earning a pout from him.

“You pay for my piercing, I pay for our dinner. Simple,” you shrugged, walking out of the restaurant and letting him follow behind you.

“Is your place near here?” Chan asked.

Your eyes widened, not understanding why he was asking you that, a million possibilities of reasons why running through your head about what he could possibly have intended from asking that.

Chan realised your internal conflict after a few seconds, his expression flustered when he realised, “no, no! I meant like, how are you going back home since it’s late,” he explained slowly, hands gesturing slowly as he spoke.

You hummed, “I think I might have a bus I can take from here, but it’ll probably take a while,” you shrugged, eyeing him curiously when he’d taken his phone out of his pocket.

“Address?” He asked, and you told him as such, “your place is actually pretty near mine, I stay a couple streets down. Let me see if I can book us a car or something, I reckon it’ll be faster than taking the bus,” he murmured, and you watched him type on his phone quickly before a triumphant smile graced his features.

Letting out a surprised hum, he showed you his phone, “it’s less than 10 dollars if we share a car, do you want to?”

You nodded with a shrug, “sure,” taking your phone from your pocket to check the time, seeing that you’d gotten a text from Jisung.

Jisung


8:08pm -school starts next week???-

You sighed in realisation, making Chan frown at you curiously.

“What’s wrong?”

You laughed, shaking your head, “nah, it’s nothing. I just realised I’m starting school next week, but I feel like I haven’t done anything during my holidays,” you groaned, turning to Chan with an exaggerated sad look on your face, seeing his eyebrows lift in an expression you would use to comfort a crying child.

“Jisung and I had so many things we planned to do like…go to amusement parks or like….go camping or have a sleepover, but…we just ended up spending all our time at peaches,” you laughed.

“Oh, you guys wanted to go camping?” Chan asked, an idea sparking in his mind when you’d nodded affirmatively at him.

“That’s pretty…coincidental… Hyunjin and I were actually planning on going camping next week, do you wanna come?”

Your eyes widened, not expecting such an opportunity to come so quick for you.

“Really? Where were you guys planning to go?” You asked, and you’d felt his hand gently touch your forearm, the other hand swiping around on his phone before he showed you pictures of what looked like a cabin.

“There’s this place out of town where you can sort of rent the area and you can like, do barbecues and campfires, it’s really nice,” he smiled, “oh, and there’s like this lake nearby the site that looks really really beautiful in the morning. And you don’t even have to pay because Hyunjin’s parents bought a part of it so he can just use it privately,” you nodded, impressed at how convenient and attractive the place sounded.

“But…isn’t it kind of weird if it’s just me going with the both of you? Do you mind if I ask Jisung along too?” You asked hesitantly, a sheepish expression on your face.

Chan laughed, nodding as he wordlessly grabbed your arm, leading you to what you assumed was the car you booked, opening the door for you to go in first before he slid in after you.

You greeted the driver, who had given you a friendly greeting in return as well. One thing you noticed (regrettably or fortunately, you wouldn’t say) was that the back seat was a little cramped, the seats angled in such a way that you would tend to slide towards the middle. Being bigger than you, Chan occupied more space compared to you, causing you to practically be knee to knee when you sat comfortably.

“Also,” Chan yawned, leaning back in his seat, “to answer your question, yes, of course you can ask Jisung to come along. Felix is coming too since he’s been begging me to bring him.”

Chan shoved his hands in the pockets of his jacket, sliding down in his seat. “we’ll probably only stay over for a night so you don’t need to pack much I guess…and Hyunjin can give us a ride to and from the cabin.”

You nodded, covering your mouth when you’d yawned as well. “Great,” you sighed, turning your head to look at him only to see him already looking at you with a tired expression, his gaze darting from your eyes to your ear.

Feeling shy from his staring but too flustered to confront him about it, you simply let your gaze fall to your lap, thinking about the upcoming camping trip.

“I don’t have your number, do I?” He murmured, seeing you shake your head no.

Unlocking your phone, you passed it to him so he could enter his contact, not missing the way he’d put his name as Chan instead of Chris, adding a wolf emoji behind his name.

“Thanks….for the dinner,” you murmured, seeing as you were getting closer to your house, figuring you had better say it now than never.

Chan huffed, “I should be thanking you, for not rejecting the offer,” he told you.

You scoffed, not believing that this was the first time, “I mean, you’re always swarmed at peaches, pretty sure it’s not the first time someone accepted your dinner offers,” you joked, regretting your joke when you saw the way he smiled at you, as if he knew something you didn’t.

“It kind of is….maybe ‘cause I never had the time to….offer to get dinner with all my work going on,” he said casually.

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, your mouth running faster than your mind could process, “so what made you do it this time?” you laughed.

Chan shrugged, leaning forward to rest his head lightly on the headrest of the seat, turning to look at you with an unreadable expression, his voice barely louder than a whisper.

“I don’t know, sweetie. Something about you just seems to keep pulling me in,” he shrugged.

"Why do you keep calling me sweetie?” You let out a nervous huff of laughter, looking elsewhere in fear that looking at him would make you more flustered, not knowing what sort of confidence came over you for you to ask him so boldly.

“Would you rather me call you something else? Honey? Baby—”

“How about my name?” You interrupted before he could go any further, your reaction seemed to have amused him to no end, making him erupt in a fit of giggles.

“Well that’s no fun, is it?” He scrunched his nose up in distaste, making you scoff.

“Why do I get the feeling that you won’t stop even if I asked you to?” you narrowed your eyes at him.

Pushing himself off where he leaned against his seat, he’d leaned dangerously close to you, your heartbeat starting to race at his proximity before he’d abruptly ruffled your hair, leaning back as if nothing happened.

“You are absolutely right,” he had a triumphant smile on his face.

Shaking your head in feigned disapproval, you saw that the car was slowing down, the driver trying to find your apartment complex.

“Yep, you can stop here,” you told the driver, slinging your bag onto your shoulder before waving at Chan.

“Goodnight,” you murmured, smiling out of your sheer shyness that you couldn’t explain (or maybe you could, but just didn’t want to admit it—ignorance is bliss after all).

He gave you a tired smile, tilting his head as he waved at you. You were already getting out of the car, leaning down before you closed the door since he seemed like he was about to say something.

“Goodnight…Y/N.”

===

After that day, Chan had started texting you, and you weren’t sure what to make of it, not wanting to misinterpret friendliness for flirting but at the same time not being able to stop yourself from thinking it was as such.

You would see him at peaches, and he would come sit with you during his breaks, and you would spend time lounging at the sofas reading books and sharing funny or interesting things about the book with each other, much to Jisung’s entertainment.

“I see that now you have Chan you don’t need me to accompany you to peaches anymore?” he would tell you, not without a dramatic sigh.

“That’s not true, we just hang out during his breaks,” you shrugged, nervous that Jisung’s questioning would actually make sense.

“And tell me again why you guys don’t just decide to date?” you shushed him, not wanting Felix to overhear your conversation since he was clearing a table near where you and Jisung were sitting.

Felix said he’d given Chan the day off since he had pretty big pieces to do for his clients these few days, which according to Felix would take at least 7 hours each and left Chan feeling dead tired afterwards.

“It’s not up to me,” you shrugged.

Jisung gave you an unamused look, “oh, really.”

You glared at him, “you better not try anything weird when we go camping or I'll really throw you in the lake.”

“Over my dead body,” Jisung stuck his tongue out at you, “I’ll see you guys married before I let you kill me.”

And it seemed Jisung really did mean it, because when the day came for you guys to go camping, you had met with Jisung and Felix outside peaches to wait for Hyunjin and Chan to come pick you guys up, the two boys showing up eventually, with Chan sitting in the passenger’s seat.

Momentarily relieved that you wouldn’t be put in another stressful situation of squeezing in the backseat with Chan, your relief was short-lived when Jisung had eyed the passenger’s seat, executing the first step of his self-proclaimed brilliant plan.

“I want the front seat! Please, I get motion sickness,” he deadpanned, knowing Chan would be worried enough for him to switch seats with him.

Chan had his hood covering his head when he got out of the car, looking more than a little tired as he murmured a soft greeting to you, surprising you when he pulled you into a hug, earning you an excited smile from Jisung who was already seated in the passenger’s seat. He greeted Felix with a hug as well, letting you get into the car before he did, Felix going in after him.

“Sorry, I really wanted to talk to you but I’m really tired, hope you don’t mind if I just take a nap,” he murmured to you, earning a dismissive shake of the head from you.

“No, no, not at all, go ahead,” you assured him, “it’s a pretty long ride anyway, might as well use it.”

You didn’t miss the appreciative smile he gave you before he leaned his head back on the headrest, folding his arms in front of his chest and closing his eyes.

“He didn’t get much sleep last night, was up late doing designs for one of his clients,” Hyunjin murmured after a while when Felix had commented on how Chan had fallen asleep so quickly.

You nodded, figuring some clients would have more specific demands for tattoos since their shop was pretty well known.

Looking out the window as Hyunjin drove, you gawked at how nice the scenery was, preparing yourself for the turn that he was about to make, your body tensing up when you’d felt Chan’s head fall gently against your shoulder, having slid down in his seat after falling asleep.

Not wanting to wake him, you silently hoped your shoulder wouldn’t be too uncomfortable for his head, trying to stay still so you wouldn’t wake him up.

Jisung had turned around to tell you about a ‘wild boar’ he claimed he’d spotted, stopping himself when he saw Chan’s head resting on your shoulder, pressing his lips together.

“I think the universe is helping me execute my plan.” Bringing a first up to his mouth, he pretended to tear up.

Glaring at him, you ignored both him and the way Chan unconsciously leaned into you as he slept, relaxing after a while as you grew to find it comfortable.

“We’re almost here,” Felix told you, giving you an amused look, “pretty comfortable over there, huh?”

You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t help the smile from your face, shaking your head.

When Hyunjin had stopped the car, him, Jisung and Felix were already getting out of the car to help shift the things out from the trunk, and you’d shifted your body to the side as carefully as you could, lifting Chan’s head from your shoulder gently, one of your palms against his cheek, a part of your heart fluttering when you felt him lean into your touch.

Snapping out of it, you cleared your throat softly.

“Chan,” you murmured, tapping his hand to wake him, his eyebrows furrowing before his hands came up to rub his eyes, leaning away from your hand.

“Y/N?” He murmured.

“We’re already at the cabin,” you huffed in amusement.

Chan opened his eyes, glancing at his surroundings, “oh, sorry,” he turned away, pushing the door open and getting out quickly, and you swore you saw his ears tint pink, wondering if he was actually shy or if you were just hallucinating.

Once you were out, you saw Jisung waving you over, “help me,” he whined, making you roll your eyes, but you left Chan’s side to go help him bring the cooler of drinks and whatnot into the cabin, Hyunjin choosing now to explain the room situation.

“You guys can choose roomies now, I’m probably rooming with Chan,” Hyunjin raised his hand to announce once you were all in the cabin.

“We’ll take the other room,” Jisung shouted, already grabbing your hand to pull you aside as if you were picking teams in school instead of just deciding roommate situations.

Felix laughed, nodding, “I’ll take the last room then.”

Only when you’d gone into the room you realised that it was already about mid-afternoon, and you had heard Felix shout something about going to play at the lake, hearing shouts of agreement from Hyunjin and Chan.

“Did you bring clothes for swimming?” Jisung asked you, and you answered him with a shake of the head.

“Wasn’t planning on swimming,” you told him.

Jisung looked at you, erupting into boisterous laughter, “shit, me neither….black shirt should do, don’t you think?”

You shook your head, laughing with him, “not like we have much of a choice.”

After getting changed, you’d met up with the rest of them outside the cabin, Hyunjin leading the group of you to a lake near a small waterfall, Felix, Hyunjin and Jisung jumping in first, leaving you and Chan behind.

“Well, what are you waiting for?” you asked Chan.

“I could ask you the same thing,” he gave you a look, “do you know how to swim?”

You nodded confidently…before shrugging, “I know the basics, like floating,” you said to defend your lack of skill.

Chan brought his tattooed arm over his chest to grab his other shoulder, “doesn’t matter, nothing to be ashamed of,” he told you casually, getting into the water and holding a hand out for you to take.

Stepping down carefully, you’d used Chan as a leverage for you to get into the water, almost stumbling when you’d stepped on a particularly slippery part of land, Chan quickly reaching his hands out to your waist to steady you, your face and neck heating up from how flustered you were.

Chan had helped you till you were able to walk on your own, surprising you when you found that the water reached up to your chest.

You heard Jisung call out for a game of chicken, deciding you would split into pairs and the losers would have to cook for later.

“I pick Felix! He’s super light!” Hyunjin called out, raising his hand to make his point known.

You were about to call for Jisung when he’d raised his hands.

“I’m the referee!” he shouted, making you gape at him, knowing this was probably another part of his plan.

“Alright, so me and Y/N are one team,” Chan said, nodding at Jisung.

Turning to you, Chan brushed his hair away from his forehead, wetting his lips before he spoke.  

“You can’t have me on your shoulders, I’m too heavy,” Chan laughed, making you cover your face.

“I can’t believe Jisung,” you muttered to yourself.

“what was that?” Chan asked, already making his way in front of you, and you saw that Felix was already on Hyunjin’s shoulders, the only advantage they had visibly being that Hyunjin was taller.

“Nothing,” you blurted, glaring at Jisung when he gestured for you to hurry up, Chan bending down in front of you to make it easier for you to climb on, his hand going behind your leg to push you up, and you’d settled down quickly, trying to see if you could balance well.

“Is it okay if I put my hands here? Is it stable?” you felt Chan place his hands around your shins, but you still felt like it was pretty wobbly. Either that or you were just in a generally wobbly mood from ending up in this situation with Chan.

“Not really, it still feels like I could fall,” you hummed,  your breath hitching when he’d moved his hands up to place them above your knees, hoping he hadn’t felt the way you tensed up. (He did)

“Is this better?” he asked, making you blurt out a small ‘yeah’, oblivious to the looks Hyunjin and Jisung were exchanging.

“Okay firstly the rules are: have fun, no kicking or biting, once you get knocked off you lose even if you’re still on your partner’s shoulders,” Jisung mustered his best announcer’s voice as he explained the rules.

But a part of you couldn’t focus with the way Felix was taunting you and Chan was drumming his fingers on your thigh.

“Ready?” Jisung lifted his hands as though he were starting a boxing match. “Go!”

You almost screamed with how quickly Hyunjin had advanced, Felix reaching out his hands towards you which you responded instinctively to by holding your hands out in front of you, palms facing him, pushing at his hands.

“Y/N I think the point is to push him off, not hi-five him to death,” Jisung cackled, making Chan laugh as well, Hyunjin moving to splash water in Chan’s direction.

Once Felix had caught hold of your hands, you knew you were in for it, he’d interlocked your fingers, trying to sway you left and right in the hopes that it would make you more wobbly.

“Having a good time on your date up there?” Hyunjin called out sarcastically, starting to get tired of balancing from all of Felix’s movements.

You swore you felt Chan grip your legs tighter from Hyunjin’s statement, making you eager to end the game.

Felix had let his grip loosen almost momentarily in his distraction when he glanced at Chan for his reaction, and you took that as an opportunity to find his weak spot, tickling the area under his wrist, making him draw his hand back quickly with a squeal, all of this happening while Hyunjin was trying to rub his eyes, Felix’s hand on his head making his hair press against his eyes.

Once you saw the opportunity, you prodded at Felix’s side, his ticklish reaction sending him falling off Hyunjin’s shoulders, a loud splash sounding when he landed in the water. Followed by shouts from Jisung and a loud groan from Hyunjin, of course.

“Hyunjin and Felix are on dinner duty, then!” You cheered, your hands going down to Chan’s hair when you almost lost your balance in your excitement, accidentally tugging on his hair, making his hands fly up to yours, having to keep himself from letting his eyes roll back, peeling your hands away from his hair.

“Woah, woah, woah, let’s get you down from there,” Chan laughed nervously, making you realize what you were doing, letting him bend down so you could get off of him, jumping in the water to get used to it again.

You’d made your way over to Felix, wanting to make sure he was okay, seeing him wiping the water from his face, “are you alright?” you asked.

“Look at him, gloating,” Felix pretended to be upset, directing your attention towards Chan, who looked your way, but you looked away immediately when he’d lifted his shirt slightly to keep it from clinging to his skin.

Dear God, you hoped Jisung hadn’t seen that.

“Wow, Chan, okay we get it!” Jisung yelled, making Chan drop his hands, a shy smile on his face.

Jisung looked at you with wide eyes, “did you see that?!” He whispered harshly to you while Chan was busy discussing something with Hyunjin.

Felix gave you a look, “why does he seem like he wanted you to see that?” He pointed at Jisung, making you shake your head, for lack of a better response.

“Also, I’ve been meaning to ask you,” Felix continued, lowering his voice so they wouldn’t hear, “do you guys like…as in like you and Chan...like is there something going on?” Felix asked, his eyes widening in curiosity.

As you glanced over at the subject of your conversation, making eye contact with Chan as he gave you a soft smile, unknowingly returning the smile before turning back to face Felix.

“What makes you think that?” you murmured, feigning confidence.

“Well, for one, that weird smile thing you guys just did,” Jisung pointed out, making you roll your eyes.

“Doesn’t mean anything, he’s just…really friendly,” you shrugged, frowning when Jisung leant over to whisper something in Felix’s ear, after which he’d left promptly to head over to Hyunjin and Chan.  

Felix looked at you with a teasing smirk, “yeah, very friendly from the looks of it,” he waggled his eyebrows at you suggestively.

About to react defensively (as usual), your attention was diverted from Felix when you heard Hyunjin clear his throat, “hey guys, I think me and Felix will head back to wash up first so we won’t start preparing dinner too late,” you heard scattered murmurs of agreement before Hyunjin had started heading out of the lake.

“Stay with him,” Jisung instructed you urgently, making your eyes widen in confusion, seeing as Chan looked as though he had no plans on leaving the lake.

Increasing his volume, he announced, “I’ll be heading back with them too, you guys can just take your time, I’ll call you guys back when we’re done washing up,” Jisung waved, following behind Felix and Hyunjin.

Hyunjin turned around to wink at you, “have fun,” he drawled, which as much as you tried to ignore, you couldn’t help but read into.

Chan made his way to where you were in the water, tilting his head at you expectantly, “you’re staying here too?” he asked, his unexpected question catching you by surprise.

Nodding slowly, you’d brought your hand to brush against the surface of the water gently, “figured I could use a little break too.”

There was a hint of a smile on Chan’s face, nodding, “you still scared about school?”

You contemplated the question, realising that you were in fact a lot less anxious about school compared to a few weeks ago. “I’m alright, really… what about you?”

Chan shrugged, “usual, I guess,” he led you to an area of the lake that was more calm, the sun beginning to grow less harsh, “if you’re bored waiting for school to start you’re always welcome to come to the studio, you know.”

“Jisung’s been telling me the exact same thing,” you said with a laugh, “says I could get myself a tattoo while i’m at it.”

You hadn’t expected Chan to be so serious about it, “well, you can, you know.”

Shaking your head, you let out a huff of laughter, almost shy under his gaze as you averted your gaze, “oh, no, i’m not really too keen,” you said.

Your words had struck a nerve with Chan, making him wonder if his tattoos were making you uncomfortable. Though he’d bounced back quickly, lighting up with a smile, his dimples showing obviously as he did so.

“My friends and I used to come here a lot…sometimes I would come here just to chill and just like…float around, it’s pretty nice. Especially in the early mornings,” he told you, using his hands to push the water around.

“I don’t really know how to explain it,” he admitted, “it was a really nice feeling.” He told you, though he himself didn’t sound very satisfied with the adjective he’d chosen.

“If you could compare it to a feeling you get when you do something else, what would it be?” you asked out of sheer curiosity, earning a thoughtful hum from him.

“Lemme think about it?” He requested, earning a nod from you before he continued, “you mentioned just now that you knew how to float, right?” he smirked, earning another nose scrunch from you.

“Well, by float I kind of meant like…yeah, you know maybe I kind of exaggerated that a little,” you gave him a sheepish smile.

Chan pressed his lips together in an attempt to stifle his laugh, nodding as you felt him grasp your wrists.

“Do you trust me?” he asked, and you didn’t even have time to feel embarrassed at how quickly you nodded.

I mean, you let this man near your face with a needle, it was a little too late to say you didn’t trust him at this point.

Angling your body so your side was facing him, you felt his hand go behind your back, “relax,” he let out an amused huff, making you sigh, nodding as you tried your best to relax your muscles.

“Now, just like, lean back, and make sure you look up.”

You did as you were told, keeping your hands by your side and your head up facing the sky, all the while feeling his hands behind your back supporting you, a strange feeling of calm washing over you as you looked at the sky which was beginning to set.

Chan noticed it too, the way he felt you relax under his touch, enjoying how calm you looked now, happy that he could share this experience with you.

After you decided you were calm enough, you leaned forward, Chan’s hands instinctively going to the nape of your neck  to steady you as you got up, with you ending up facing him, his hand still gently cupping the nape of your neck, his other hand finding its way onto your waist.

“How was it?” he breathed, a hint of a smile playing at his lips.

“I think I get why you like doing that…it felt…nice,” you murmured, “have you thought of it yet?”

Chan nodded, a strange feeling building within him that he could only describe as warmth, feeling as though something in him was drawing him closer to you without him knowing.

“It’s kind of like...calling you after a long day,” a shy giggle leaving his lips after his statement.

Your breath hitched, the feeling of receiving such personal information rendering you at a loss of words. Unconsciously, there was a feeling of want building inside of you when you could see Chan leaning in, your head unconsciously tilting upwards, not daring to close your eyes yet, and his lips were barely inches away from yours, so close that you really thought that Chan was going to kiss you in the middle of this lake.

Though just as his other hand had went under the water to touch your waist gently, you figured the universe had decided it wasn’t time yet.

“Guys! I’m back! You guys can go shower now!” you jumped when you heard Jisung’s voice, immediately moving away so you could put some distance between you and Chan.

Chan brought his hands up to his ears, pressing and rubbing them firmly, getting out of the lake first to help you get out of the water, all the while Jisung had been eyeing you suspiciously.

The walk back was otherwise silent, with Jisung going off to disturb Felix and Hyunjin while you took a shower. Once you were done, you took your time drying your hair, seeing a text from Jisung come in asking you to hurry up.

Walking over to the barbecue pit you noticed Chan had taken over for Felix, grilling the meat with an ease that had let you know just how much he’d probably done it before.

“That smells really good,” you hummed, seeing Chan look up from the grill to give you a shy smile, nodding at you.

“D’you want some?” he asked, holding a small piece he’d just cut between the tongs, blowing on it before holding it out for you, a hand cupped underneath in case it fell.

Feeling Hyunjin’s gaze on you, as well as Felix and Jisung, you felt put on the spot, leaning over to take the piece between your teeth, letting out a satisfied hum at the taste.

“Alright, sorry to interrupt your…whatever this is, but we’re gonna steal Y/N for a while, so bye,” Jisung waved, linking his arm around your elbow and dragging you away with a very giggly Felix.

“Okay, let’s begin the meeting,” Felix announced authoritatively once you were seated at the campfire area. Jisung joined in on the joke smoothly, “okay, I’ll take minutes.”

“Why am I here, again?” You sighed, fiddling with the side of the foldable chair you were sitting on, crossing your legs to get into a more comfortable position.

Felix giggled, shaking his head before continuing, “important question, what do you think of Chan?”

You scrunched your nose up in distaste, “how am I supposed to answer that objectively?” You whined, seeing Felix nod encouragingly at you.

“No, no, that’s the point! I want you to be as subjective as possible.”

You hummed, “well, I don’t know, I guess, he’s really nice…and considerate?” Most of the time, at least. “He’s…cute? Like you know, the whole…dimples and all,” you shrugged, shuddering at how foreign it felt for you to actually list out the attributes you liked in Chan.

“He’s a real geek too, which is kind of cute, and all,” you mumbled, grimacing at them as a silent plea for them to end your misery.

“If,” Jisung emphasised, “you knew he liked you and whatever, would you get into a relationship with him?”

Felix made an impressed face at Jisung, “oh, that’s a good one. Chan doesn’t really date a lot,” He jut his lips out thoughtfully.

“I guess…I would? I mean,” you hummed in thought, “from what I’ve experienced, I feel like I can trust him? That’s the vibe I get when I’m with him or when we like, you know, call... and all?”

Felix’s lips pulled into a pout, “I feel like we need to call in an expert for this.”

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, “huh? Who?”

Felix tapped his phone, setting it back down and giving you a cheeky smile, the playful glint in his eyes making you nervous.

And you should’ve been, because when you saw Hyunjin walking over you knew you were either in for an interrogation or a whole lot of teasing.

“Alright, Chan’s just setting the table so we don’t have long, what’s up?” Hyunjin nodded his head at Felix, hands in his pockets and a bored expression on his face.

“Has Chan been behaving strange…or like just..different lately?” Jisung asked, making Hyunjin look directly at you, narrowing his eyes at you in realisation.

“I knew it! I knew there was something up,” he cried, making you shush him in fear that Chan would hear.

“What are you talking about?” you shushed him.

Hyunjin rolled his eyes, plopping himself on the seat next to Jisung.

“Let me just tell you,” he sighed deeply, “Chan has been so weird recently. He gets shy at even the slightest mention of you, and don’t think I don’t see how he’s been on his phone more lately.”

“I’ve noticed a great increase in thirst traps as well,” Jisung said seriously, clasping his hands together as if he were a reporter.

“Exactly my point!” Hyunjin told Jisung, “my bet, is that he’s been trying to get your attention but he’s doing it in the only way he knows how and that’s being a flirty bitch,” he said simply, leaning back with a nonchalant shrug.

Jisung nodded slowly, turning to Hyunjin, “I didn’t really like you at first...but can I just say...I love you.”

You brushed him off quickly, “are you sure, though? ‘Cause like, I’ve been telling myself for a long time now that I didn’t wanna read too deep into his actions,” you winced.

“Honestly, the best piece of advice I can give you right now is to just read into it.” Hyunjin told you, earning vigorous nods from Jisung and Felix.

“We should probably be heading back now, before Chan starts to get suspicious,” Felix murmured.

This made Hyunjin giggle, “yeah, I told him I was coming here to call you guys.”

Upon reaching back to the small barbecue area, you saw that Chan was already seated, giving you a soft smile when he spotted you.

“Food smells great, thanks guys,” Jisung sighed in satisfaction, him, Felix and Hyunjin having shared some sort of unspoken agreement to let Chan sit next to you, unbeknownst to you.


Suppressing the tension in you that you were feeling whenever Chan had reached over to put things on your plate, you had started eating, all of them falling silent when they ate, which you didn’t mind. But you knew Jisung did, and you wished you could disappear when he’d broken the silence.

“How’s your ear healing?” He asked pointedly over a mouthful of food, earning a confused hum from Felix, whose hand went up to his own ear with a frown.

“Ear? Who’s ear?” Felix followed Jisung’s gaze and realised you had a new piercing on your ear, his eyes widening, “woah, when did you get that done? It looks great! Dude, doesn’t it look great?”

He nudged Chan with his foot, making the older boy turn to you, nodding blankly, though his ears had started to grow redder with every second.

“I did it for her,” he shrugged, his casual demeanour making Felix nod slowly, a small smile appearing on his face as he gave Chan a knowing look.

“Thought you usually let Hyunjin do piercings?” Felix questioned pointedly, amusement laced in his tone.

Chan simply shrugged, pretending to be occupied with his food, “yeah, not always.”

You glared at Felix, telepathically asking him what he was trying to do, seeing him do a little happy dance in his seat, pretending not to notice your glare.

“Are we gonna set up the campfire after this?” Hyunjin asked, seeming to have taken pity on you, earning nods and hums in response. 


“We need to get the firewood from the back first,” Jisung mentioned, giving you a particularly pointed look.

You raised your eyebrows, trying to figure out what he was trying to imply before you realised.

“I can go get it later,” you offered (curse peer pressure), missing the way Hyunjin and Felix looked at Chan, exchanging triumphant looks when Chan had cleared his throat.

“I can go with you, it’s too much to carry on your own,” he proposed smoothly, his gaze meeting yours and his tongue darting out to wet his lips.

“Enjoy your date,” Jisung coughed, making you roll your eyes. You hoped the campfire would be over quickly.

While the rest of them were clearing up and setting up the snacks, you and Chan had gone to go get the firewood.

You would’ve usually found the silence to be quite soothing, with the way you could hear the crickets chirping and the gentle swishing of the lake, not to mention the way the air had gotten cooler from when you’d arrived. However, something about your discussion from just now had made your thoughts spiral into an endless cycle of trying to figure out what every one of his actions meant.

“Are you alright?” You asked abruptly after you noticed he wasn’t making any move to start any conversation.

“What makes you ask that?” He let out a small amused huff.

“I don’t know.. you know, like, Hyunjin told me just now in the car that you didn’t get much sleep these days and stuff…”

Chan gasped, holding his hand up to his mouth in exaggerated shock, “are you actually…worried for me?” He teased.

Scoffing, you ignored his giggles as you replied, “of course, I was. You slept like a log for the whole car ride,” you grit your teeth with feigned annoyance at him.

Chan shook his head calmly, not being able to help the smile from his face at your concern. “Honestly, you don’t have to worry about me. I mean, this is my job. I know that there will be times where I have to be tired to know that i’m moving forward, you know?” He shrugged, making you frown.

“That’s…true, I guess,” you murmured, seeing him step before you to open what looked like a garage door, seeing the firewood there, letting him pass some to you, “but you know…I couldn’t help but worry.”

Chan let out a surprised hum, taking a bunch of firewood in his arms, letting the door fall closed before he locked it back.

“Why? Did you think I wouldn’t take care of myself?” He asked, a small smirk on his face.

You nodded, “obviously, yes.”

Chan shrugged, “guess you have no choice but to take care of me, then.”

Your breath hitched, almost letting your firewood slip from your arms. Regaining your composure with a scoff, you ignored the way he giggled at your flustered expression.

Straightening up, you huffed at him, clenching your firewood tighter, “you’ve got to stop saying things like that.”

“Why?”

“Just….because,” you struggled to form a proper answer, knowing you couldn’t just expose yourself now, thankful that you were already reaching the campfire site.

Felix gave you guys a big wave when he saw you approaching them, cupping his hands around his mouth before yelling, “took you long enough!”

After struggling to light the fire, you’d sat in between Chan and Hyunjin, the warmth from the fire slightly uncomfortable but soothed by the soft wind blowing against your face and neck.

You were surprised to see how fast the sun set here, but strangely it put you in a calmer mood, maybe it was because you couldn’t see as much but you didn’t push the feeling away.

“Here,” you were interrupted from your stargazing when you saw a stick with a roasted marshmallow attached to the tip in front of you.

Looking at it hesitantly, you made a slight sound of uncertainty, feeling too full from your meal for snacks.

Shaking your head no, he gasped, “you have to try them, it’ll be good, I promise,” he nodded encouragingly at you.

Chan brought the stick closer to your lips, and you’d wanted to take it from him but it was already almost pressing against your lips, so you’d given up, ignoring Jisung’s smirk and taking the marshmallow into your mouth.

You gave a small hum at the sweetness, not having expected it to be so soft, smiling unconsciously when you saw the grin that he gave you after seeing your reaction.

After talking with the guys about their stories from the past whenever they came here, well, by they you meant Hyunjin and Chan, but you enjoyed the stories nonetheless. Something about the area holding more of an attractive charm to you.

After some time had passed and the sky had gotten even darker than before, you didn’t miss the way Chan had gotten quieter as time passed, simply smiling along with the stories but his eyes doing nothing to hide his fatigue.

Figuring it was about time to call it a day, you turned to Jisung to mouth ‘I’m tired’.

Jisung gave you a look that mirrored yours, nodding. Thankfully, he’d already made to stand up, Chan turning to give him a curious look.

“Hey, we’re gonna call it a day, you guys are free to continue hanging out if you want,” the rest of the boys nodded, Chan turning to you with a tired smile, reminding you of the car ride you shared, the look on his face making you want to just reach over and cup his cheeks, refraining from doing so by standing up abruptly, nodding.

“Goodnight, sweetie,” he smiled, eyes turning to crescents, making you smile in spite of your embarrassment, practically having to pull Jisung along with you back to the cabin with how much he was giggling.

Flopping onto the bed and getting ready to sleep afterwards, you’d feelt Jisung slip into the bed next to you, turning to face you with narrowed eyes.

“Don’t think I didn’t see what was happening at the lake just now,” he muttered, not being able to help the smile from his face.

“What exactly did you see?” you asked, just wanting to be sure he wasn’t just lying to make you admit to things (as usual).

“Oh yeah? Don’t act as if I didn’t see all of this,” he grabbed the pillow, grasping and looking at it with a hooded gaze, leaning closer only to pull back abruptly, directing his wide-eyed glare at you.

Jisung’s expression soon changed to one that was sheepish, “actually now that i’m thinking of it, maybe I shouldn’t have interrupted you guys,” he hummed, “but maybe it was a good thing too, if not I wouldn’t know what time you guys would return to the cabin,” he snickered, making you scoff.

Rolling your eyes, you’d reached past him to turn off the bedside lamp, “night, Jisung,” you sighed, for lack of a better retort.

You knew Jisung better than to have expected him to reply normally, rolling your eyes when you heard him muster a scarily accurate impression of Chan, “night, sweetie.”

“Shut up, Jisung.”

===

You weren’t sure what time it was, but all you knew was that when you woke up Jisung was still in bed snoring. Carefully stepping out so you wouldn’t wake him, you stepped out of bed, spotting Felix already huddled around the tv there with Hyunjin.  

“Morning,” Felix greeted, making Hyunjin turn around to greet you with a nod as well.

“Uh-huh,” you yawned, dragging yourself over to them. “What’s the plan for today?”

“Hyunjin and I thought it’d be a fun idea for us to play games today, and since it’s only a few of us I thought it’d be a good chance for you and Chan to, you know…” Felix dropped his voice to a whisper, “bond.”

“Jisung would love that,” you shook your head in dread, your thoughts wandering back to Chan, about to ask where he was.

“He went for a run, if that’s what you’re wondering,” Hyunjin told you with an amused lilt to his tone, making you flush in embarrassment.

“What makes you think I was wondering that?” you scoffed, tilting your chin up defiantly at him, your gaze looking him up and down for added intimidation (not that Hyunjin cared, of course).

Hyunjin merely shrugged, giggling, “pretty sure you know the answer to that yourself.”

You left them in the living room to go take a shower, sitting on the bed when you were done, shaking Jisung awake gently.

Jisung groaned, his hands coming up to rub his eyes, “what time is it?”

“Almost one, please get up. Felix and Hyunjin said we’re gonna play some bonding games today,” you sighed, laughing when you saw the way he stretched his arms out above his head, his eyes scrunching shut.

“Bonding games?” he whined, “the hell? I feel like I’m at a school camp,” he whined.

“He says the winner gets to dine free at peaches for a month,” he perked up at that, sitting up in bed.

“A very good school camp,” he corrected, an impressed hum leaving his lips.

Rolling your eyes, you saw him get up, moving to go to the bathroom to wash up, “I’m gonna go find things to eat,” you hummed, hearing him grunt in response, which you took as your cue to leave, stepping out of the room and walking to the kitchen area.

Fortunately or unfortunately for you, Chan was there, standing leaning against the counter in all of his post-workout glory, dressed in another black sleeveless shirt and shorts, sipping water and using his phone.

“Morning, sweetie,” he greeted with a smile, strangely making you nervous, suddenly unable to make eye contact with him.

“Heard from Hyunjin that we’re staying in the cabin today?” he asked, bringing his water bottle up to his lips to take a long sip.

You nodded, and as if on cue, Felix had entered the house, pushing his damp-looking hair away from his forehead as he walked over to where you were.

“It’s starting to rain outside, so I don’t think outdoor activities are much of an option right now,” he gestured out the window.

Following his gaze to the window you realized that it really was raining, the droplets slowly decorating the window.

“There’s a few board games near the fireplace, we can just play with those,” Chan gestured to the living room and Felix nodded, already making his way over.

“I’m gonna go shower, you guys can start first if you’re all ready,” he called before walking off leaving you and Felix in the living room to fish out the board games from the cupboard. You were surprised to find that they were still in good condition, not having expected them to be anything but dusty after being kept in the cupboard for god-knows-how-long.

“Okay, so we have a few options,” Felix murmured, picking up the games as he spoke, “there’s ‘uno’, there’s ‘monopoly deal’, whatever this is, ‘clue’..” he trailed off once he didn’t recognize whatever the rest of the games were.

“I’m leaning towards ‘uno’,” Felix hummed, considering the games as seriously as you’d ever seen him, not even looking away when you heard one of the doors open, Jisung making his way over to where you guys were, Hyunjin following behind him with a yawn.

“What are those?” Jisung asked.

“Board games, come here, take a look,” you beckoned him and Hyunjin over, seeing them bring a few games of their choice over to the coffee table, the four of you taking your places naturally at each side of the table.

“Should we decide on lunch first? I’m hungry,” Hyunjin suggested, whining and patting his stomach like a child.

Felix had raised his phone up at that, a smug look on his face, “I ordered us some pizza just now because I saw that they delivered here.”

You sighed at the thought of food as you thanked Felix, beginning to grow peckish at the thought of food, directing your attention towards the television in your attempt to find a distraction.

“Does that tv work?” You asked, seeing Hyunjin nod, leaning his arms on the coffee table to support his head as he waited for Felix to distribute the cards in his clumsy, Felix way.

“I watched some movies on it this morning, they’ve only been playing Christmas movies though, the channels are pretty limited.”

“I’m fine with Christmas movies,” you hummed, Jisung sighing deeply beside you.

“I wish it was Christmas.”

Changing your location to the sofa, you made yourself comfortable as Felix chose the channel, Jisung insisting on dimming the lights for the living room to look more cozy, after which he made his way over to where you were seated on the sofa.

“Can I sit here,” Jisung pointed next to you with a pointed look, “or did you already reserve it for your boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend?”

Jisung’s head snapped around to see Chan coming into the living room, dressed in a baby blue sweater and black sweatpants, his hair slightly damp and messy on his head. The sight of his smirk flustering you into fixing your gaze on the television.

Jisung’s mouth clamped shut quickly, shaking his head dismissively as Hyunjin struggled to stifle a laugh.

Chan had ‘let’ Jisung sit on the sofa next to you, seating himself on the space on the floor between the coffee table and the sofa in front of where you sat, his proximity causing you to pick up the hint of cologne he was wearing.

“Oh, Christmas movies! Nice,” Chan commented, earning a ‘I know right?’ from Felix, meanwhile Jisung was wiggling his eyebrows at you, using his index finger and thumb to pinch his sweater and pointing at Chan, which you figured was Jisung’s sign language for ‘doesn’t he look good in that sweater?’

Ignoring Jisung for the sake of your sanity, the uno cards went ignored as the group of you focused on the movie. Something about the mood of the movie served to put you in a calm mood, ( or maybe it was Chan’s presence, you couldn’t tell ) so much so that you didn’t realise how quickly time passed until you heard a knock at the door.

You wouldn’t know this but Chan was thankful for his seat in front of you, figuring that if he were seated next to you he wouldn’t have been able to think about anything other than putting his arm around you or something cheesy like that.

Jumping up quickly, Felix offered to take the pizza, coming back to the living room with the boxes and a too-large bottle of sofa, placing it onto the coffee table with a harsh thud.

Hyunjin was quick to start eating, and Chan had turned his head around to look at you, shifting to the left to make space for you on the floor. You know, just out of his consideration.

Giving him an appreciative nod, you reached over to take a slice, not missing the way Chan poured drinks for everyone, silently doing things for them to take care of them, something about it making your heart swell just a little bit more.

“Can we play a game after this? The movie’s getting kind of boring,” Jisung frowned, his tone extra desperate, you should’ve known his intentions when he’d waited until Chan wasn’t looking to shoot you a wink.

Shrugging and murmurs of ‘yeah why not’ or ‘sure’s sounded among the group, Felix turning to Chan with a knowing look on his face.

“This one’s really competitive when it comes to games,” he gestured at Chan with his pizza crust.

Chan lowered his head, a shy smile on his face, his clean hand coming up to touch his ear, though he made no effort to deny Felix’s accusation.

“Really?” You asked, hoping you hadn’t replied too quickly, seeing Hyunjin nod gravely at you.

“I thought I was competitive but that was until I swam with him,” Hyunjin said with a raise of his eyebrows, shaking his head.

“It’s your fault for thinking you could go against him, you of all people knew he won all those medals in the past,” Felix laughed, making Hyunjin let out a stubborn huff.

“Medals?” Jisung hummed thoughtfully, nudging you with his knee.

“Yeah, I was in a lot of swimming competitions when I was younger,” Chan told you, a rather embarrassed expression on his face.

“A lot,” Felix echoed, a strange feeling building inside you from the new-found information, something in you finding the thought of baby Chan swimming absolutely endearing.

“Enough about me,” Chan waved his hand in dismissal, “let’s just play, okay?” Chan changed the topic quickly, making Jisung jeer but moving to clear the table nonetheless.

Once you were all done clearing up and washing your hands, Jisung having made sure to occupy a lot more space so it left you and Chan with little space, you’d returned to the living room, seeing they’d already laid out different games on the table.

You realized they’d decided on playing uno first, leaning over to Jisung with an urgency to your gaze.

“Why are we playing this?” you whispered harshly, panic in your eyes, earning a snort from Jisung, who shielded his cards from you almost immediately. Talk about friendship.

“I’m not teaching it to you again, you never listen to me,” he scolded you, making you frown as he pushed your stack of cards towards you, “face your fate, loser.”

The game had started, all of them seeming to know what was going on, and you hoped it wouldn’t be too obvious that you didn’t know what you were doing, always having to clarify if what you were doing was correct before putting it down, and it was no surprise that you were always at the brunt of the ‘+’ cards, Chan noticing not long into the game that you weren’t necessarily going in with a strategy.

“Uno!” You heard Felix shout, followed by Chan, and you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.

“Wait, so do you win?” you mumbled, your hand coming up to touch your deck anxiously, peering at the middle stack of cards in confusion.

Chan laughed, “not yet, we still have to clear the last card.”

Nodding slowly, you simply followed the flow of the game, already having given up on winning, especially when Hyunjin yelped, Chan setting down his last card with a triumphant grin on his face.

Your lips parted in shock, about to set your cards down to reshuffle when you heard Jisung call out, “Second best!” and the game proceeded.

Chan leant back and rested his weight on his hands, tilting his head and peering over at your hand, a small giggle leaving him at the neat arrangement of the cards by colour and value.

You lifted the card of your choice slightly, showing it to him, silently asking what he thought, and he leant over to tell you which ones you could put down, and as you continued you were shocked at the rapid rate your hand was decreasing in number.

Your breath hitched, body tensing slightly when Chan had rest a arm on your shoulder, not having noticed how close he was to you until now ( and neither had he ), his left hand going up to either direct you or place the card down for you.

“Why does this feel so different from how I usually play?” you marvelled as he’d basically played for you.

“Maybe because Chan actually knows what he’s doing,” Jisung snickered, earning chuckles from Felix and Hyunjin as you scoffed.

As if by some miracle, Chan had helped you win the second place, earning protests from Felix who insisted that it doesn’t count because Chan played for you, to which you ignored, obviously.

Demanding for a break to regain his composure, Jisung had slumped against the sofa in defeat, and you’d almost instinctively reached over to nudge him when you realised Chan’s arm was still weighing on your shoulder.

He shifted his arm, bringing his hand up to push your hair away from your ear, “sorry, d’you mind? Just wanna check if it’s healing alright.”

You nodded, your gaze following Felix leaving to get more snacks, Hyunjin eyeing you suspiciously.

“Was it alright after we went swimming yesterday?”

You nodded, trying to ignore the way Jisung was tucking his hair behind his ear obviously behind Chan, batting his eyes at you.

“I think you can give it a few more weeks and it should be all healed,” he nodded, bringing his hand off of your shoulder, an unreadable expression on his face, which only served to make you more nervous. Chan wasn’t sure why he’d done this to himself, the urge to just bring you somewhere away from the boys and kiss you starting to become a little suffocating.

"I should probably still visit you, right? Just to be sure,” you murmured, averting your gaze to the bracelet on his wrist.

Chan smiled, his eyebrows lifting slightly in amusement, “you don’t need an excuse to come and see me… ”

And just like that, you dared yourself to meet his gaze again, instantly regretting your action when you saw the way Chan was glancing between your eyes and your lips, the giddy feeling building within you almost making you forget that Hyunjin and Jisung were in the room.

The boys wouldn’t have this, of course, and they’d made their presence known, Jisung’s loud cough making Chan’s gaze dart up, and in your shock you’d immediately put some distance between the both of you, flushing from how reckless you’d almost been. This wasn’t like you.

Standing up, you excused yourself to go to the washroom, Chan seeming to have regained his composure fairly quickly judging by the giggle that had escaped him from seeing how flustered you were.

“Hello?” Hyunjin chided, “we’re still here, you know.”

Chan sighed, “unfortunately.”

This made Jisung gasp, “that’s gross,” he shivered exaggeratedly, turning to Hyunjin, “speaking of which, when should we start heading back?”

Hyunjin glanced at the time as Felix was making his way back to the living room, “I think we can play one or two more games before we start to leave, we already packed up the rest of our stuff last night after you and Y/N went to sleep.”

“I’ve got this family dinner tonight, so I don’t think i’ll be joining you guys for dinner,” Felix pouted, earning a grunt of acknowledgement from Hyunjin.

Jisung pursed his lips, looking as though he were about to say something, finally relaxing his shoulders and shrugging, "I have no excuse. I just want to go home and sleep.”

“What about you, Chan?” Hyunjin asked, earning a shrug from the older boy. “Don’t you still have to finish up that design for next week?” Hyunjin prompted, referring to the client that Chan had been specially dealing with recently.

Chan shook his head, “that can wait till tomorrow,” he sighed.

Meanwhile, in the bathroom, you’d splashed your face with water, hoping that you could lessen the heat you felt from your previous encounter with Chan. Giving yourself a resolute stare in the mirror as you convinced yourself that your cheeks totally weren’t pink right now.

After much convincing, you decided you were spending a little too much time in the washroom, returning to the living room at a reluctant pace, nervous at the sight of the boys all seated there talking and laughing.

“Did you show Jisung that thigh piece you did for that girl?” your eyes widened at Hyunjin’s question.

Thigh piece? You’d reminded yourself that tattoos could be anywhere, even places you would be too flustered to let Chan touch.

Chan was the first to notice that you were back, shooting you an amused smirk once you were seated next to him.

“Are you..better?” he teased, making you roll your eyes, waving him off.

“What are you guys talking about?” you asked, curious yet scared of your possible discovery.

“Chan did this sick piece for this girl, it was huge, it took him like 3 days,” Hyunjin said, words speeding up in his excitement as he took his phone out to show you the design.

Hyunjin had shoved his phone at Felix first, earning a low sound of approval from Felix, “wow, this is so cool.”

You grew more curious as the phone was passed to Jisung, all the while Chan simply smiled shyly, dimples appearing in his satisfaction that his work was being appreciated.

“This whole thing?! Where did she get it on?” Jisung exclaimed, making you furrow your eyebrows, suspicion rising.

Jisung shoved Hyunjin’s phone before you, and you saw a large detailed work that looked like a lady you would see in those scary lara croft movies.

Your eyes widened, a part of you feeling a little intimidated by the image.

“She said she wanted something that was like... a little creepy with like tomb raider vibes so I just went with it,” Chan explained, making you nod thoughtfully, hoping your shock wasn’t too obvious.

“You didn’t answer the question about the placement, though,” Felix spoke up with a curious lilt to his tone, looking down at his thigh and trying to mark out with his hand possible areas to place a tattoo like that.

“It’s a little hard to describe, we spent a while discussing but we eventually decided that we’d put it somewhere here,” Chan leaned over to Felix who had his leg already stretched out, placing a hand at the side of Felix’s upper thigh, marking an area that covered a little bit of the butt and most of the side of his thigh.

“It was crazy, the details were really amazing,” Hyunjin let out a low whistle.

“Thanks,” Chan laughed, making you scrunch your nose, your first thought being how the process would be like, knowing whoever was getting the tattoo would have to be showing quite a bit of skin to get it done. Since when were you so uptight? Snap out of it, it was just a tattoo on her thigh, no big deal.

Though you couldn’t help but turn to Jisung, lowering your volume to a discreet murmur.  

“Does that mean she had to take off her pants?!” you whispered harshly, making Jisung burst into a bout of hearty laughter.

“Is that your concern? because I mean, it’s not like Chan’s gonna tattoo her clothes, right?” Jisung’s chest heaved with how hard he was laughing, his statement catching Chan’s attention, said boy turning to you with an amused look.

“What’s wrong, baby? Are you shy?”

Jisung squealed, and you pitied Hyunjin for sitting next to Jisung because now he was the victim of Jisung’s hits.

You sucked in a sharp breath, feigning confidence by glaring at Chan, though on the inside you already knew you were more than flustered from his comment, wondering what gave him the audacity to be so bold.

“Mayhaps…” Hyunjin gave you a teasing smirk, “jealous?”

Felix’s eyes widened, excitedly tapping his leg in anticipation.

“Shut up,” you waved your hands, shooting a look at Chan, “I’m going to get water,” you murmured, starting to get up when you saw Chan stand up as well.

“I’ll go too,” he said, raising his hands up in defence when he saw you turn around to glare at him, “what? I just wanna look at what snacks we can bring back.”

Sighing, you let him follow behind you to the kitchen, pouring yourself a glass of water while he rummaged in the cupboards for snacks that caught his eye.

Lowering your voice to a murmur so the boys wouldn’t hear, you grit your teeth, “I told you you have to stop saying things like that,” you muttered, holding your glass of water to your lips and leaning against the kitchen counter.

Chan made a confused sound, closing the cupboard while he had a few bags of snacks in his hand, “stuff like what?”

You shot him a look, “you know what i’m talking about. Look, I know it might be fun or whatever for you to flirt but it’s gonna be your problem when I start… feeling some way about it,” you snapped, annoyance taking over you at how even at this moment you still managed to find Chan absolutely attractive.

Chan looked at you with a soft smile on his face, raising his eyebrows slightly at you, “go ahead.” He took a step towards you, making you furrow your eyebrows.

“What?”

Chan moved closer so he was just about to walk past you, leaning over so his lips were barely touching your ear, and it took you every inch of willpower in you not to flinch away.

“I want it to make you feel something,” he murmured, walking back into the living room nonchalantly after that, leaving you stunned in the kitchen.

“Y/N get your things! We’re leaving soon!” You heard Jisung’s voice snap you from your trance, nodding to yourself and finishing the rest of your water and walking over to your shared room with Jisung.

“Dude! Chan is stressing me out,” you whisper-shouted once you entered the room, seeing Jisung turn around like a deer caught in the headlights.

“What did he say?”

You recounted what happened in the kitchen to Jisung, who was an excited wreck after you were done, clenching his fists next to his head in his sheer inability to contain his excitement.

“He totally likes you, it’s so obvious at this point, what more is there to think about?” he told you matter-of-factly.

Sucking in a sharp breath, carrying your bag on your shoulder and squeezing your eyes shut before opening your eyes harshly, you shook your head.

“I don’t know what the hell I’m gonna say to him when I see him at peaches… can we change our spot?” You shot Jisung a look, though the both of you knew you had no plans whatsoever to change cafes.

“Hey, don’t worry, you’ll be fine.”

Surprisingly, that served to be of some consolation for you during the dead silence on the ride back, Chan having fallen asleep again but this time he’d leant against the window so that saved you from more stress, you guessed.

Hyunjin had dropped Felix off at his house for  his family dinner first, followed by Jisung who was insistent on wanting to sleep.

You remembered Chan mentioning to Hyunjin at the start of the ride that he wanted to head to the shop after dinner so you didn’t bother waking him up when you’d reached your house, figuring he should get as much sleep as he can if he was going to be working later on, choosing to text him instead.

5:57pm -hey, didn’t wanna wake u just now so ill say bye to u here instead haha-

Once you were home, you couldn’t help but wonder if Chan was going to call you again today, like how he usually did. But after almost applying shampoo on your body in your distraction you’d decided not to make yourself too anxious about it, choosing to tidy up your house and watch movies to kill time since you wanted to enjoy the rest of your holiday while you could.

Thanks to a little too many romantic comedies, you’d successfully forgotten you were waiting for Chan to call you, already halfway through devouring your ice-cream sundae when you’d startled at the sound of your phone ringing.

Peeking at the caller id, you were almost embarrassed at how quickly you’d answered once you saw Chan’s contact name, putting the phone on speaker on your lap.

“Hey,” you heard him murmur, his tone soft and gentle, yet there was something about it that sounded a little on edge, “hope I didn’t interrupt you when you were about to sleep or anything.”

You shook your head, “oh, no, not at all, I was just... chilling,” you shrugged, picking up your remote to turn the volume down on your tv.

“Are you home?” He asked you, earning an affirmative hum from you.

“You?”

“Nah, I left the shop a short while ago… ”

You wracked your brain for a response, your mind running wild imagining all the possible ways the conversation could go.

Was he going to ask you about what happened in the kitchen? Or should you have asked him instead?

Whatever it was, the longer you kept silent, the more your heart picked up speed, a part of you growing desperate to confront him and just ask him about it over the phone because you knew you wouldn’t have to face him in real life if you did— no matter how cowardly it was of you.

“Oh, please be careful, it’s really late,” you murmured, wincing at your shitty reply.

You heard him huff on the other line, “oh, yeah. Totally… don’t scold me but…I feel a lot better after hearing your voice.”

Stunned into silence, you were unsure how to react, a nervous laugh leaving your lips, “list—”

“Can—” you’d spoken simultaneously, a laugh escaping you. 


“You go first,” you insisted, scooping the last bits of your ice cream up as you waited anxiously.

“I was actually wondering uh… can we talk? I’m almost at your house.”

Your eyes widened, glancing at the door in shock, placing your ice cream down on the table haphazardly.

“Oh, uh, yeah sure. Of course we can, gimme a sec,” you said, hurriedly putting on the jacket you had draped over the sofa next to you since you weren’t wearing a bra, hearing the knock at your door when you hadn’t even finished slipping your arm through the sleeve yet.

“Just a minute!” You shouted, hanging up the call and jogging over to the door, opening it to reveal Chan.

You’d tensed up almost instantly, the time of the night coupled with  something about the way the light from your house hit him making him look like he was glowing.

“Hey,” you breathed, seeing him give you a close-lipped smile. “Come in,” you ushered him in, closing the door behind him, though he stayed at your door, looking almost scared to walk any further.

“I’m sorry, again, for coming so unannounced it’s just that… this has been, you know, weighing on my mind for the longest time and after what happened in the kitchen earlier today I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry,” he blurted, his hand coming up to grasp the back of his neck, letting go and letting his hand fall back to his side.

You hoped you didn’t look too dumbfounded.

“Sorry? For what?”

“Nah, like… I was thinking about it just now and I realised that I never thought about how I could be like, you know, imposing my feelings on you and I know that just because I feel a certain way doesn’t mean you have to feel the same way and I just felt really bad because I never meant to put you on the spot or—”

“Chan, calm down,” you laughed, hands naturally going up to his shoulders to rub them reassuringly.

He nodded, meeting your gaze and sucking in a sharp breath before sighing deeply, “you know what? I’m just gonna say it. I’m sorry, in advance. Just so you know, you can reject me, i’m perfectly fine with it. I just have to tell you this before I lose my mind,” he huffed, heaving another sigh.

“I know it’s no secret but… I like you Y/N.”

Your eyes widened, your smile growing bigger, unable to help yourself because of how endearing it felt to see Chan who usually looked so intimidating and confident suddenly become this rambling wreck before you.

“Me too,” you nodded, suddenly feeling more confident now that you knew how he felt, the knowledge spurring you on.

“I’m sorry—wait, you do?”

You nodded, “I’m surprised you couldn’t tell, I did for a while now… ”

Chan let out a relieved sigh, and you felt his shoulders relax under your touch, his hands going up to cover yours which were placed on his shoulders, grasping them gently, his hands cold to the touch.

“Thank—now I’m glad I came here. I thought hearing your voice would be enough but now that I’m here I’m thinking, seeing you…” his hands peeled yours away from his shoulders, interlocking his fingers with yours, “feeling you,” he took a step closer to you, so close that you could feel the warmth radiating from him.

“Is so much better,” he muttered.

It was as if you were transported back to the lake, with the way you felt him leaning closer to you, and taking a step back, you felt your back hit the door gently, his thumbs smoothing over the back of your hands, making you giggle.

“So, I take it as I’ll be receiving more… ‘dinner offers’?” You said, mustering your last bit of confidence.

Chan let out an amused huff, taking his lower lip between his teeth gently and shaking his head at you. Leaning down, Chan brought your hands up to press them against the door on either side of your head, his head dipping down to your neck, pressing a kiss to your neck, the way just the smallest of gasps left you making him smile.

“You really… drive me crazy, sweetie,” he murmured, the smile practically evident in his tone.

Moving his head higher, he pressed a soft kiss to your jaw, the cold metal of his lip ring making you shiver, pulling away so he was face-to-face with you.

“May I?” He smiled, and you’d wished you could have cupped his face and kissed him right there, and it seemed as though he’d read your mind, letting go of your hands.

Once he did so, you’d taken the opportunity to cup the sides of his face, your hands closer to his ears, pulling him closer and pressing your lips against his.

Feeling Chan smile into the kiss, you’d almost shivered at the feeling of his hands going to your shoulders before running them down slowly to your waist, deepening the kiss as he gave your waist a small squeeze, making you utter a surprised sound, sighing into the kiss as you felt his hands going down to grasp your hips.

“Ice cream?” he hummed after you’d felt him lick your lower lip, making you scoff, not knowing how to respond to him, which had only served to further amuse him.  

Feeling confident, he pulled away only slightly (eliciting a rather disappointed sound from you), surprising you when you felt his teeth nip lightly at your lips, making you pull away, cheeks flushing.

“So,” you ignored his comment, pulling away in your shock, seeing him tilt his head at you with a giddy smile on his face, as if he hadn’t just done whatever he did in the past minute, “I take that as a yes?”

Chan hummed, pressing a hand against your back and pulling you closer to him so your chest was flush against his, smirking at the way your hands had almost come up to cover yourself.

“Kiss me again and I’ll tell you my answer.”

[sugarmaplewings-fics]

Deep Blue Fantasy Part Three

Pairing: Merman!Tamaki Amajiki x fem!reader

Warnings: Uhh . . . sexual tension? Idk how to describe it. I guess this is the most PG-13 bit of it but there’s nothing too crazy

{Pt. 1}  {Pt. 2}  {Pt. 3}  {Pt. 4}  {Pt. 5}  {Pt. 6}  {Pt. 7}

くコ:彡くコ:彡くコ:彡くコ:彡

You made your way down the familiar rolling hill that led to the ocean, inhaling the briny air. The winds whipped your hair around your face haphazardly, tossing it as they pleased. You scrunched up your nose and tried to spit the stray strands out of your mouth, which proved to be a struggle.

Trying to tame your now spit covered (H/C) hair, you allowed your feet to sink into the black sand. You reveled in the feel of it squishing and shifting between your toes.

Waves noisily crashed over the black rocks, rougher today than they were normally. The wind was stronger than usual, and you expected a storm was on its way, judging by the gray look taking over the sky. You frowned at the wind, wishing it could be a nicer day when something caught your eye.

Pale skin contrasted the black sand it was lying on, dark water crashing around a pair of shoulders.

You knew how dangerous the waters could be, especially on a day like today. It was forbidden to step foot in the ocean; your father never let you or anyone else forget it. But there was clearly something wrong, so you risked coming closer for a better look.

A man roughly your age was lying on his back, partially submerged in the water that curled and fell over him. You realized, to your further shock and horror, that this man was completely naked.

His eyes were shut and you couldn't tell if he was breathing or not. An odd necklace laid against his bare chest, somehow miraculously staying on after the apparent chaos he had been through. What was he doing out here? Was he some castaway washed up on shore? Was he some idiot who had decided to go skinny dipping at a bad time?

You decided none of it mattered as you knelt next to him, finally giving up on trying to keep your skirts out of the water.

You put a finger under his nose, checking for breath. To your relief, a warm cloud collected between you. So he was alive, if only faintly. You tried shaking his shoulder, wondering if you could wake him up. His skin was cold, so cold, just touching it made you shiver.

No matter how hard you shook him, he wouldn't stir, making you worry. Finally you dragged him further out of the water, taking off your jacket and draping it over him, hoping to provide some warmth.

"I'll be right back," you whispered, standing up again in order to race home to find help.

✤✤✤✤✤

Tamaki blinked his eyes open, light bleeding into the crack of his vision. It was too bright, and his head hurt. His whole body throbbed and tingled and something about him felt . . . different.

He was laying on something very soft and wrapped in layers of coverings, which trapped in his heat nicely. Where was he?

His memory suddenly flooded back to him, the necklace, the waves . . . his legs.

Tamaki's eyes snapped the rest of the way open, cringing at the onslaught of light. He was in some kind of room, bathed in afternoon sunlight. It was relatively simple, only holding a bookcase, a wardrobe, and a small vanity table. He had never before seen so many warm shades, marveling at how much yellow could be picked up by his eyes.

He lifted the blanket off of him, cold air rolling over his brand new legs. He was wearing another type of covering over the lower half of his body, these loose-fitting and a light blue color. They obstructed the view of his legs, only showing him his bare feet. Tamaki bunched some of the fabric in his hand, twisting it slightly in curiosity. He then experimentally bent his knee, straightening and bending it again until finally taking his foot into his hand. Tamaki brushed his fingertips over his toes, spreading and curling them. He finally allowed a small smile onto his face. He'd done it. He had legs.

Tamaki suddenly noticed something about his thoughts. They had changed slightly. It was still him thinking them, yet they felt almost foreign. He was thinking in . . . words. That's what they were called. He was used to forming sounds in his mind, but generally he used pictures to think. Now they flowed silently in individual sounds, each one with its own meaning. A new one would appear every now and then, and Tamaki would just sort of know what it meant.

Before he could start unpacking his new mental system, a noise drifted into his ears. It reminded Tamaki of singing, but this was distinctly less musical. Could these be words except . . . spoken? The knob on the door shook, the sound coming from the other side. The door swung open, causing Tamaki's breath to catch in his throat.

You walked in, followed by a woman who appeared to be a few years your senior. You wore a light-colored sundress and a glittering circlet was delicately placed atop your head. Tamaki noticed how your (H/L) (H/C) hair gently bobbed and flowed as you walked. He'd known you were pretty, but he'd never seen you this close before, and he made a point to memorize every feature of your face which until now, he'd only caught glimpses of from afar.

The woman behind you was speaking, her hands wringing her skirt. "—princess, please. This isn't—"

"Oh! You're awake!" You met Tamaki's eyes, your face melting into a heart-stopping smile.

Princess? What's a princess? Tamaki wondered.

Your face suddenly went serious, almost frowning at him. Tamaki fought the urge to shrink back from your gaze, unsure of what he'd done to evoke such an expression. "Brianne, could you give us a moment?" you requested of the woman behind you, your eyes never leaving Tamaki's. "Since my father is away for the week, it is my duty to deal with him."

Brianne sighed, releasing her dress. "Very well, then." She stepped out of the room, closing the door after her.

You crossed the room, bringing yourself a few paces away from Tamaki's bed. You folded your arms in front of your chest, quirking an eyebrow at him. "Do you realize—" you spoke, your voice smooth and even, curiously filling Tamaki's ears in a way he was unaccustomed to, "—that swimming on that beach is forbidden?"

Tamaki frowned, taken aback. The beach?

You must have seen the look of confusion written across his face, because you relaxed slightly. "Sir, are you from this island?"

Tamaki shook his head, answering truthfully.

You uncrossed your arms, resting a hand on your hip. The gentle smile returned to your face, making Tamaki marginally less tense. "So you are a castaway. Your ship must have gotten stuck in another storm." You glanced out the window that was leaking sunlight into the room. "You were out nearly all day. You missed the storm we had over here. But the sun's out now."

Tamaki couldn't take his eyes off you. He wanted to ask you so many things, to tell you how much he admired you, but nothing would take hold in his mind.

You finally looked back to Tamaki, your eyebrows creasing in concern. "You don't talk much. You aren't going into shock, are you?"

You closed the distance between him and yourself, resting a warm hand on his forehead. He stiffened at your touch, explosions of feeling firing off in his chest.

"I did find you half-drowned and naked on my beach. I'm glad you don't feel so cold anymore."

Tamaki frowned at your words, focusing on one which was foreign to him. He decided to experiment with his voice, his throat bobbing as he swallowed nervously.

"N-naked?" he asked, the word finally sliding over his tongue. It felt odd, using his voice like this to communicate, but sound was able to travel differently through air than it did in the water.

You blushed, averting your eyes to the floor. "The wreck must have torn off your clothes or something. We-we gave you some pants." You bit your lip, embarrassed by the subject matter.

Tamaki fiddled with his pants again, the new word bouncing around his brain as he twisted the cloth between his fingers. Now that he thought about it, humans did have a strange obsession with hiding their bodies from each other. The merpeople didn't really practice the custom, although Tamaki knew some of the mermaids liked to wear decorative pieces tied around their chests; anything from shells to seaweed. He'd even seen someone sporting a discarded man-made flag.

"You s-saved me." Tamaki finally said, turning back to you. "I thought I was going to die." His words were coming easier now, formed in his head and then shaped by his tongue. "Thank you."

You smiled. "I didn't really do anything. I just found you." You extended a hand. "I am Princess (F/N) (L/N) of the Islands of Thapia, it's a pleasure to meet you."

There it was again; princess. Tamaki decided not to ask, in case he ended up looking like an idiot. It couldn't be anything too important, although the way you said it almost made him wonder . . . .

"I'm Tamaki Amajiki." I've been watching you for the past two months, and I might be in love.

"Where are you from?"

Tamaki sighed, uncertain of how to answer. "Far away from here."

He vowed to himself to tell you, but now wasn't the time.

Your gaze slipped down to his chest, admiring the necklace that hung from his neck. "I like your necklace. Where did you get it? Is it a family heirloom?"

Tamaki brought his fingers up to it, subconsciously fiddling with the shell. "I'm borrowing from this lady."

"A lady?" Your eyebrow shot up again. "Got someone back home?"

Tamaki jolted at your words, his hand flying from the necklace. "No! It's just me."

"Just you?"

The raven-haired man swallowed and nodded.

"Well," you said, straightening, "since you weren't breaking the safety laws and you clearly aren't from around here, I am making it my personal responsibility to care and provide for you until you are ready to return to your home.

Tamaki blinked. "You'd do that?"

You shrugged. "Where else are you going to stay? Besides, I get lonely here and you seem like a nice person."

You thought he was nice? He might cry at the thought.

"Would you like anything?" you continued. "A meal? More blankets?"

Tamaki bit his lip, suddenly noticing how his stomach clenched around nothing at your words. How had he not noticed how hungry he was? "Some food would be nice. Please."

You smiled and nodded. "I figured as much. I'll get Brianne right on that."

You ducked out of the room and Tamaki waited patiently in his bed, tapping his fingers together when something caught his attention. A dark form had moved from behind the glass of the window. Tamaki had never seen anything like it, wondering how he hadn't noticed the clear panes before. He stared outside, watching as leaves on a tree shook with an invisible breeze, another form darting through the air into his vision again. He now recognized the creature as a bird, however, he was used to the larger, white sea birds that he would always find when he came up to the surface. This one was so dark and compact, and Tamaki found himself finding it cute.

He watched it intently as it fluttered about, poking around in the grass for a stray worm. Its activities intrigued him so much he barely noticed the time passing, jumping when he heard his door swing open.

You strode in, carrying a tray laden with food. "Hi, again. I'm back." You set the tray on Tamaki's lap and grabbed a chair from the other end of the room, pulling it up beside the bed so you could converse.

"Th-thank you," Tamaki said, looking down at the bowl that was before him.

"You're welcome!" you beamed. "You just missed lunch, so we still had some stew left over. Our chef is really nice and he warmed some up for you! I'll have to take you to meet him later." You gasped at a new thought. "I should take you on a tour! I'm sure you'll like it here. I don't get visitors much, it's usually just the same islanders. Aren't you hungry?"

You had noticed Tamaki hadn't touched his food yet.

"Sorry! I was just, um, distracted . . . ." It was the truth, watching you talk was like some kind of dream to him. The way your mouth moved intrigued him, holding your smile through your words. There was something so indescribably enrapturing to him as he watched you. He felt like he could listen to you all day.

Listening to you . . . . That was right. Your voice. Tamaki had to figure out how to ask you to sing for him so he could finally hear it up close, untarnished by distance and wind.

Now wasn't the time, though. Tamaki's stomach painfully reminded him. The only problem was . . . what was he supposed to do? At home, he was used to being able to eat everything with his hands. But this was obviously a liquid, and something told him just shoving his fingers in wasn't the answer.

He swept his gaze over the tray, his eyes landing on a little slice of another foreign item to him. It had a tan crust, with a light, almost fluffy center. He picked it up, throwing multiple glances over to you in case you made a face to signal he was doing something wrong. Tamaki held it to his nose and sniffed. It smelled . . . good. Really good. He dunked it in the stew and brought it back out, lifting it up to his mouth and licking off some of the broth.

Flavors unlike anything he'd ever experienced before exploded in his mouth, and he found himself biting off some of the disc he'd dipped in it. This was another flavor, a little plain with the faintest hints of sweet. Tamaki happily chewed, already trying to figure out how to consume it all as fast as he could.

"You like the bread?" you asked, noticing his overjoyed expression. "I baked it this morning, with some help from Brianne. Brianne's my handmaiden, by the way. You've seen her, right? She was with me when I walked in the first time."

Tamaki looked over and nodded, thinking back to the older, somewhat heavy-set blonde woman from before.

You went on, beginning to explain your nearly perfected technique for baking bread. Tamaki tried to follow what you were saying, but it was difficult when he didn't even know half the terms you were using. Oven? Yeast? Dough? Tamaki could never have imagined how vastly different his world was from yours.

All too soon, he finished his 'bread', or at least, he was pretty sure it was bread. He frowned a little, disappointed, until his eyes alighted on another object on the tray. He picked it up, instantly feeling that it was metal. He used it to scoop up some of the chunks of meat and vegetables, finding them even better than the thick broth he'd been eating before.

He finished the last of what was in his bowl, a new sense of satisfaction settling in his stomach. But something else was tickling the back of his throat. He felt almost dry. He looked over to another bowl-like object on the tray, this one cylindrical and tall. He picked it up, seeing liquid inside.

It was water, it had to be, due to how clear it was. But the memory of seawater gushing into his mouth only a few hours before made him hesitate. He'd hated the salty taste of the ocean. Did humans actually drink that stuff? Tamaki tipped it towards his face, cautiously dipping his tongue into the water. This surprised him; it wasn't salty at all. It was clear and nearly tasteless, but somehow so deliciously satisfying.

He downed the whole thing in a matter of swallows, which you noticed, making you stop in your impromptu bread lecture. "You must be pretty dehydrated," you said sympathetically. "You swallowed a lot of seawater out there. And threw up a lot of seawater too. You're lucky you survived. Our shores alone would be enough to kill you. I can't even imagine floating out at sea." You studied him, a light of what looked almost like respect and intrigue flickering behind your eyes.

Tamaki's cheeks heated, feeling guilty that he was slightly misleading you. He had a month, he told himself. He'd tell you who he was and why he came. He just felt like he could adjust a little more first. Make sure you liked his presence before dumping ancient forbidden secrets upon you. Yeah, that seemed best.

"Are you still thirsty?" you asked Tamaki, jolting him out of his thoughts. "I can get you some more water. In fact, you can come with me if you want! I'll take you on that tour I mentioned. Ooh, I can show you the whole town! Maybe tomorrow, though, it's getting late. Come on." You pulled the now empty tray off his lap and set it on a table beside his bed, next walking to the wardrobe and pulling out another article of clothing. You laid it out on the bed, looking to Tamaki expectantly.

His brain took a moment to catch up, suddenly realizing you wanted him to stand. He'd never done that before. Tamaki squinted down at the floor, wondering why it had to be so far away. Finally he swung his legs over the side of the bed, sliding forward until his feet hit the cold wood below. He quickly pulled them back up, sensitive to the temperature.

You winced. "Sorry about that. I'll try to find you some shoes. Maybe my dad has some that are too small. You can come with me and check."

Shoes? Jeez, for all they did, humans almost seemed fragile. Tamaki lowered his feet back to the floor, now anticipating the gentle cold sting against his bare skin. He slowly raised himself, wobbly balancing on them. He was doing it! He was standing! On land!

Now walking. One in front of the other, right? Tamaki eagerly shifted his weight to one foot, maybe a little too excited. He toppled into you, and you just barely managed to steady him in your arms.

"Woah, there, slow down," you said, suppressing a chuckle at his now beet-red face. "I get it. You probably haven't gotten your land legs back yet. I've met the trading sailors."

His land legs? Sure, that was it. He just needed to develop them.

"Here, you can lean on me," you said. "You've been through a lot, I understand."

Tamaki carefully straightened, gripping your shoulder to steady himself. He tried for another step, this time more careful. You shuffled forward with him, helping as he put weight on his foot.

A step. His first step! Tamaki could flip—or, he would if he were underwater. Trying to do a quick somersault here could only end in disaster. Tamaki went for another step, then another, finding a rhythm to it quickly.

"There you go," you praised, your voice so quiet and genuine as you smiled up at him, gently guiding him around the room. It was only now that Tamaki realized how much taller he was than you. He could probably put his chin on the top of your head if he wanted to. You were so small, it made an odd feeling of wanting to protect you wash over him.

He suddenly realized he had frozen, staring at you. His cheeks warmed yet again and he glanced back down to his new bare feet. You had been staring back, but him breaking the connection of your gaze had jolted you back to reality. A very . . . touchy reality.

You only now realized just how much of his bare side was pressed up against you, and heat rose to your own cheeks. "Uh—shirt. Bed. I put a shirt ON the bed. It's for you." You tried to pull away from the man beside you, but he wasn't prepared and pitched to the side, forcing you to hug him again in order to prevent him from falling. "This is awkward, I'm so sorry," you said, suddenly beginning to trip over your words. "It's my fault. I'll—"

You tried to pull away again, gently this time, until Tamaki seized your hand in his. "It's okay," he said, looking into your eyes with sincerity. "I don't mind."

You swallowed, really wishing he was wearing that shirt right about now. Only because, a small part of you was glad he wasn't. You had to physically restrain your eyes from roving over him more than you already had.

Stop it. This is foolish, you chided yourself. The mind of a future queen of the Thapian Isles has no business in gutters like these.

And yet, the way your chest was squished against his, the way his pants were slung so low on his hips . . . the sudden memories of how he'd looked, sprawled out on that beach—

"Um, Princess?"

You hadn't even heard the door click open—maybe you hadn't shut it all the way—but the voice of your handmaiden made both you and Tamaki jolt.

"Brianne!" you said, your voice embarrassingly squeaky as you let go of your grip on Tamaki's hand and waist, jumping away from him.

He instinctively threw out his arms, balancing himself on his own.

You walked back to the bed, yanking the white linen shirt off its hanger and going back to thrust the article into Tamaki's arms.

"What were you two—"

"We were about to go get a drink!" you said, turning so you missed the deeply confused expression Tamaki gave the shirt as he held it up to examine it. "Then I was thinking I could show him around the chateau. You know, since he's going to be here for . . . a while I guess. How long until the boats back to the mainland get here?"

"It'll be another month or two," Brianne said, still looking between you and Tamaki suspiciously.

"Yep," you said, turning to find Tamaki holding the shirt upside down. "Here," you said, taking it from him. "These darn buttons always get me—" Your voice raced a mile a minute as you began to fumble with the buttons, still flustered from your interruption in such a position. "The traders just left last week," you explained, keeping your eyes glued to the shirt as you busied your fingers. "You just missed them. We're stuck here until they come back, so you'll have to deal with me until then, I guess."

The final button came free and the shirt fell open. You gave it a quick shake for good measure and offered an armhole to Tamaki. He stared at it for a moment before hesitantly putting his arm in the sleeve, letting you pull it around behind him. He shrugged it the rest of the way on, unused to the feeling of being wrapped in so much fabric.

He left it open before you frustratedly sighed, still shaken from earlier. You began to button the shirt closed, nimble fingers directing them into their respective slots with practiced ease. Tamaki watched, trying to memorize your movements so he might recreate them later.

"Alright, you ready?" you asked him. Brianne still stood in the doorway, watching your every move.

Tamaki nodded.

"Then come on! I want you to meet everyone!"

You grabbed his hand, spinning around to pull him out the door, forgetting his leg issues. A weight crashed into you from behind and the two of you toppled to the floor, Tamaki now sprawled on top of you.

"Princess . . . ." Brianne shook her head, grinning. She finally uncrossed her arms and departed from the doorway, leaving the two of you alone to right yourselves.

...

To be continued . . . .

くコ:彡くコ:彡くコ:彡くコ:彡

[Part Four]

Author's Note:

Finally! Our Tamibaby is on land! This chapter was so much fun to write. I tried to figure out how to work in some se—uh, tension in here, some ROMANTIC tEnSiOn (If you get that reference, then five stars for you). I hope it got a giggle out of you. It's been a while since I've really been able to stretch my author muscles. Tamaki is a bean as always and I love writing for him. I'm also enjoying this version of y/n. I think she's turning out really well.

Anyway, it's 3 AM and I need to go to bed. In case you were wondering, I totally did not have a quick crisis on how to spell the word 'busied'. And I also most certainly did not accidentally type 'Tamale' instead of 'Tamaki' and then spent five minutes laughing about it.

Yeah, I'm sleepy, so I'm gonna go.

Good night/morning/afternoon,

-Sugar

Taglist: 

@inumorph​​ @engel-hageshii​​ @pansexual-potterhead​​ @ure-a-sunflower​​ @xeina​​ @kingtamakimurder​​ @basicaegyo​​ @iiminibattlehero​​ @pyrofanatic​​​ @sokkasangel​​ @xoxopam4​​

[yyxgin]

no bar!! never fret about replying late. i know what it’s like to not want to talk to anyone. honestly. i won’t call it (my experience) a depressive episode bc one of my friends used to brush off me when i was saying things like i’m depressed and say ‘sad’ instead. like if i were to say ‘that made me/i am depressed’ she’d say something like ‘oh god same! like if it’s making you sad,, don’t do it.’ which is a v poor example of what she did but i never called it depressed after that bc she pissed me off n was disregarding of my feelings (even though she’s incredibly anxious herself) bc i didn’t get it officially diagnosed. idk if you’ve ever read about birth control pills but i always read on tumblr people calling them literal depression pills and i ignored it, thinking either 1) people were being dramatic / were over-dramatising it or 2) it wouldn’t happen to me anyway. it fucking happened and they were not being dramatic. i was never happy n always working on minimal sleep n making self depreciating jokes all the time bc it was the only way i could cope with my thoughts n constant mood swings. so what i’m trying to say is,, i know how it feels. if that’s any consolation. it’s not me trying to be ‘oh me too!’ or ‘mine was worse than you’ it’s just me being understanding n telling you it’s okay. also lemme at your friends!! i’ll stomp them out n get the barman to run them over for you!! they’re so mean to forget you!! i find that deciding i want to do something specific n then asking the appropriate people if they want to do saïd thing/place works for me. it can be a simple ‘we should do this, when are you free?’ helps. making it known that you want to do things helps. or aggressively remind them that it’s nice to be asked bc it means they thought of you even if you couldn’t go n tried to include you. or we can revisit me stomping them out w my beloved barman,,, whatever works best for you my dear <3

admittedly me and one of the girls were discussing that we are going to miss our manager. even though literally everyone moaned about her (i feel like it’s impossible to avoid in literally any job/situation) she did have her moments and she did a lot for the staff like after work-drinks, asking the chefs if we could order off of the customer menu instead of the staff menu or whatever they cook in bulk for everyone to take home in the evening. apparently she did this a lot more than the previous manager. she has a good heart but sometimes she ignored some of the girls when we ask for days off or our availability for the week which was very annoying of her. it could’ve been a lot worse, i suppose, but overall she wasn’t terrible.

thé lady who lives in my town and drops me given the chance, told me the other night that she used to be the duty manager. i asked her why she stopped and she explained that when they furloughed everyone they asked her to come back on like half pay or something? idk i just remember it being explained as they wanted her to come back sooner and take away her furlough so she said no and got demoted. but somehow she still gets some of the furlough? idk i have been taught that asking how much or discussing specifics of paychecks kind of thing is rude, growing up. she has been telling me they keep asking her to come back (now they’re asking her to be a supervisor since she declined the manager role) and she keeps saying no. i love her and want the best for her so i won’t say anything to anyone about the conversations me and her have had (i mean, apart from maybe my mum if i can remember, and you bc, let’s be real, you don’t know me and idk you) and she says they’re just difficult to work with as a management team. she even said our area manager isn’t impressed with our current assistant manager (who is currently the only person on an houred contract since our manager left) which shocked me since i personally think he is quite good considering he has a good relationship with the staff and kitchen (he’s thai so he can communicate with the kitchen better than most of the wait staff (some wait staff are thai but mostly not)) i think she doesn’t want to be the eldest person in management or she doesn’t want the age gap to be so big since she has a kid she can lecture at home, she doesn’t need to be looking after people at work, y’know?

also today, me and one of the girls were upstairs (two floors of the restaurant!) and it’s nearing 11pm and her brother (who also works there) comes up and asks us when we’re finishing (mostly her lol) but we had two tables just sitting talking amongst themselves so she just said idk. he was saying he wanted to go bc he’s tired etc n he’s driving n she was like it’s fine go home i’ll call an uber or something n he was refusing to leave her behind. (i feel like i brushed over the two tables sitting there but it must be noted they’re the only tables left in the entire restaurant and we were the only two wait staff still there, apart from her brother but he changed and was waiting downstairs). anyway, she was sweeping (i was cleaning the booth/sofa thingy chairs as it was a mundane task we could do to pass time and while she was sweeping by one of the tables thé boyfriend was whispering to his girlfriend saying ‘should we go?’ and the girlfriend said ‘why should i care?’ and the girl came over to tell me v quietly and i got so upset for her. bc she is literally the sweetest person on the earth and the only reason i didn’t go to ask the manager to see if i could go home with the lady who offers to take me (ex-duty manager lady!) was so she wasn’t alone up there. if i had been the one sweeping near that table i would’ve snapped so fucking hard at them. i mean, we’re 18 and have lives and sleep schedules, and we’re working until 11pm on a thursday before we even get home?? like i wouldn’t have minded staying if they were reasonable tables but after the gf said that i was like ‘shall i go get our stuff from the staff room?’ so i could split as fast as possible. in the end the temporary acting manager came up and told us we could finish and she kicked the tables out ten minutes later. i told her what the table saïd and she thought that was mean and unnecessary too. i was also worried about my sleep tonight since i have my first vaccine tomorrow morning. that’s why i was more pressed about what time i left work today. oh well.

im sorry for talking so much about work! sometimes i don’t have someone to talk to about it (at home) bc of my weird hours and sometimes i don’t like re-explaining things to my mum if she doesn’t get it the first seven times. sometimes it’s just a little too draining as she doesn’t understand since she’s a lifer at her job. it’s easier to explain to my dad but then i get a whole lecture on something that i ultimately have no control over n id rather just bitch w the girls at work but the problem is WE’RE AT WORK!!!

also i booked for my first tattoo!! i’m excited. it’s for next week,, which was super quick considering i was expecting to have to wait soooo much longer. i’ve been telling people about it and that it’s happening but i haven’t had the pleasure of telling people exactly where i got the idea from. bar, my dear, you know wheein’s new album, redd? well, it comes with loads of things, including these stickers (one for each song) and the one from springtime was just so perfect and when i saw it my first thought was, this would be a perfect tattoo. and so i am having it tattooed on my body. a subtle nod to kpop whilst also having something meaningful on my body. i also have just decided i want a small, minimalistic (or one-line art) rose on my sternum, kind of in the valley of my breasts, bc my nan was a rose. i like having her close to me. i recently got her necklace fixed which has left me feeling so incomplete after it broke in august last year. it’s been almost ten years and i think i’m long overdue something to remind me of her. i fiddle with my necklace when i’m nervous which is why i love it so much but incase it breaks again (i pray it doesn’t but i have a long life ahead of me) i would like her close still.

gosh there’s never enough space in my head to remember what i want to tell you so i’ll stop here for now since i should sleep to be able to wake up in time for my first jab. i’m scared but it’s whatever i’ll do it i suppose,, eeek 😨

ilyl ~ 🌻

thank you so much for opening up to me about this, it means a lot to me :( i am so sorry you had to go through this and honestly,, i really resonate with you. i feel like when i talk about my emotions and my sadness (dont know if its okay to call it depression either but yea), my friend either always either makes me feel like my emotions arent valid or she tells me she doesnt know how to help, which is frankly, why i dont talk about my emotions to people irl anymore. i dont open up and it takes me a long long time to do so if i ever do, because i tend to feel insecure/not safe :D so really, thank you for telling me and i hope you are doing better. your emotions are valid and i am always here for you 

HAHAHA i mean i dont have many friends so theres not many to stomp on:( but i mean,, i get passive aggressive when i feel forgotten/left out so you best believe i told my friend how im feeling, but like uhhh it didnt do much. i spent the whole weekend at work and i was free on friday but my friend decided to ditch me and yeah. i havent been out in like two weeks now and i mean i am an introvert so i dont mind that much but even i want to socialise sometimes

aah i mean every manager has their flaws, no one’s perfect. my manager keeps calling me to go to work even though i was literally there for 11 hours on saturday AND sunday which means i worked for 20 hours in two days. and i work 20 hours a week at max. and i already worked some hours before the weekend so i think i have like 30 hours now and she keeps calling??? dude i need a break too,,i am so exhausted and tired of this shit :dd

oh i totally get what the lady that drops you off sometimes told you. i would feel a little iffy if i heard it too, but like,,,judge by your own experiences!! if you feel like something is off, you can always leave,, so i wouldn’t be so stressed about it.

why are people so rude ??? dude,,you should care, because we are all human. everyone has their needs and their lives and i bet he wouldnt like it if he was the one in your place. why should you stay there longer just because he didnt want to leave?? that was so unnecessary. people are weird beings and i learnt that after working with them this weekend,,,like i litereally got screamed at because i couldnt accept cash in different currency. like,,what tf do you want me to do?? i dont have every single currency with me so i could give u the change ?? tf ??

ALSO ITS OKAY TALK ABOUT YOUR WORK HOWEVER MUCH YOU WANT !!!! i also feel like i dont have anyone to talk to about work bc my parents dont listen to me as much as they used to these days and my friend unsurprisingly just doesnt care bc she doesnt work,, and i dont wanna talk to my internet friends abt it as much bc i feel annoying so i am glad us two can talk about these things together !!!! 

YOUR FIRST TATTOOOO WHOAAAH thats so cool. i love tattoos hihi dfkja idk if u already had the appointment but tell me how it went after !! i wasnt able to find the sticker on the internet but im sure it looks hella pretty. also i love how it reminds you both of kpop and your grandma, its wonderful <3 i really want to get a tattoo one day,, and i also want something meaningful (not that i am hating on people that tattoo themselves just for fun and have no meaning behind their tattoos i just have commitment issues so i want something long lasting). alSO my crush (yes i have a crush now ew) has a tattoo and it looks like satan lowkey,,but apparently its a japanese something (i forgot the word oopsies) and it means jealousy, bad past and wisdom ?? i was like BOY IF U DONT??? fjdkla he has blue hair btw i am very much whipped but he also doesnt know me and i am older than him so this is embarrassing

ALSO I HOPE YOURE FEELING WELL AFTER GETTING THE VACCINE !!! 

ily <333

[deansawthetvglow]

Dean goes up to Cas, gives him a bunch of flowers that he picked for him, panics and speedwalks away leaving Cas delighted but confused. Cas knows that giving flowers is a human custom to express affection, but what should he do with them? Just having them stand around and wilt seems like a waste. would that even express that he feels the same for Dean? In the end Cas makes a flowercrown out of them, looking hella cute and making Dean blush and Sam proud. How about it? Have a nice day btw.

Yeah i did not write this at the beach like i said i would……and it’s so bad…the tense changes a bunch, but i just needed to get writing, u know? honestly your prompt is written far better than this in itself, so kudos to you lmao. also i cut sam out bc it was hard enough to get dean and cas’ characters right and i write sam a lot less often! sorry!

i hope you enjoy anyways, and have a wonderful day (or night idk) love!

Dizzy With Daisies

destiel, word count ~900

Dasies had always reminded Dean of Castiel. The white petals representing the brilliance of his angelic grace, the yellow center, his soul, bright and warm as the sun. 

Dean knew it was cheesy, maybe worse than the mixtape, but he was tired after a hunt and a new patch of wild daisies had sprung up over the bunker and—he could make excuses all day, all he knew was that he wanted Cas to have those flowers, he deserved them after sticking with him and Sammy after all this time. An angel tied down by brotherhood of all things, he’d stayed, through trial and tribulation and dammit, it wasn’t brotherhood to Dean anymore. 

That felt wrong, even drifting around in his thoughts. Dean felt…more for Cas. He felt the profound bond, a beacon of hope, a blessing, and he felt it wearing away at his soul with each passing day he ignored it. So, fuck it, he was gonna pick the flowers that made him think of Cas and he was gonna tie a fucking bow around the stems and he was gonna present them to the angel because, god dammit, he had nothing else to lose. 

—

Dean knelt in front of the flowers he had cut, individually and with great care, and toyed with the brown twine in his fingers. He rolled his eyes at himself, making a fucking bouquet of all things, get yourself together Winchester, and sucked in a sharp breath as he arranged the flowers and tied them together by the stems with a neat little bow. 

—

Castiel was sitting, reading in the library, Sam was nowhere to be found, it’s as good as time as ever. 

“Hey, uh, Cas..” Dean mumbled as he fiddled with the bouquet he held behind his back.

“Yes, Dean?” 

Dean could feel his face heat up as Castiel’s blue eyes met his with a smile. 

“I got you these.” He stated, pushing his hand holding the bouquet out with a straight arm and a bit too much force. 

Castiel looked curiously at the bunch of daises that Dean had presented to him. The angel felt his heart stirring deep within him as he quirked his head at the gift. He reached up gingerly and took the bouquet from the hunter’s outstretched arm, letting a few of his fingers brush against Dean’s. 

Before Cas could thank him, Dean was rushing away, heading to his room to ‘lock himself away forever, thank you very much.’

—

A vase didn’t feel as though it would be enough. 

A vase was dull and practical and not affectionate at all, not nearly affectionate as the act of hand cutting wild flowers and arranging them into a perfect bouquet. 

A vase could never do justice to such a gift, and Cas knew, “you keep those.”

Castiel spent the day lying among the grass and flowers, his own bouquet placed gently into a mug full of water to keep the flowers content until he decided what to do with them. 

Undoubtedly, Dean had meant something by the flowers, and Castiel wasn’t going to pass up an opportunity to see more of Dean Winchester’s rarely-seen soft side. 

As he lay there, staring at the clouds, a thought struck him.

With a giddy smile, he sprung from the grass, like a daisy sprouting to life, and headed to his room to get started on his little project.

—

Dean was shaking for the rest of the day, he hadn’t realized until he handed Castiel those flowers just how much meaning hung on them. If Cas had to research what flowers as a gift meant, Dean was toast. The feelings he had spent so long repressing would be out there, in the open, floating around like dandelion seeds and fucking up the perfect garden he had tended. 

It was at this moment, standing alone in the kitchen, having snuck out of his room to grab some food and sneaking back to seclude himself, that Castiel entered. 

Dean froze, his back faced Castiel, but he could hear the soft of footseteps on the hard floor. 

“Dean, I just wanted to say..” 

In the brief pause Castiel took, Dean’s mind went spiraling to the worst.

He doesn’t want you in that way. 

He faced away from the angel, only turning around after saying Castiel’s name, to make sure the words he said were taken as truth. 

“I’m so sorry Cas, I didn’t mean t-”

However, the image that he was greeted with was so much different from what he expected. 

Castiel stood, like a flower himself, with daisies wrapped delicately around his head, braided together into the perfect crown. His black hair spilled over the edges and the daisies sunk in like they were taking root in dark, rich soil. 

Dean’s breath hitched and Castiel took a few steps towards him. 

“Thank you Dean, they are truly lovely.” 

With this, he stepped closer still and Dean’s heart nearly beat out of his chest when Castiel reached up and placed something atop his own head. 

He raised a hand to feel around his hair, eyes locked with Cas’, and couldn’t supress the laugh that escaped him when he felt the delicate petals of daisies circling his head.

“Thank you, Cas”

“Of course, Dean.” he beamed. 

Dean’s face was plastered with a goofy smile and Castiel’s expression reflected his as he reached a hand to Cas’ own crown and let himself stare into his angel’s eyes. 

Subtly, he ran his fingers through the soft tufts of hair surrounding the buds. 

Finally, fucking finally, after basking in the quiet sun of affirmation, Dean let himself drift towards Castiel and, letting the minute nod of Castiel’s head be a confirmation, brushed his lips against the angel’s. 

“Flower power, Cas, flower freakin’ power,” he mumbled jokingly against soft lips, before leaning back in for more. 

[athingthatwantsvirginia]

California’s Living Dead

PART TWENTY-ONE OF THE DO YOU SEE HER FACE? SERIES

Pairing: Jess Mariano x Original Character (Ella Stevens)

Warnings: some smoking, a bit more angst here fellas, plentiful pop culture references, the original post of this got deleted somehow so I’m reposting it sorry guys idk anything about tumblr or anything really

Word Count: 4.6K

Summary: Half a year passes for Ella and Jess.

The key zipped back and forth across the chain of Ella’s necklace, clutched in her shaky hands. Cloudy afternoon light shone down on her, gray and gloomy. Cool, humid breezes blew past her, and she knew a thunderstorm was coming. As she trudged into the diner, she made a pointed effort to stare down at her converse. A Sunday afternoon lull left the place less crowded than it would have been were she scheduled for the morning. Instead, she had woken up with a headache and an urge to call Luke’s, but decided against it. She knew Jess wouldn’t be able to hide the cut on his cheek or the bruising on his jaw from his uncle. If anyone picked up, it was bound to be in the middle of an argument, and she didn’t need any more reason to bite her nails until they bled.

Slipping behind the counter, she noticed the way Luke’s eyes widened at the sight of her. As though he hadn’t been expecting her to show up. Salty air hung around them as Caesar fried up some burgers in the back, a sizzling hiss in everyones’ ears. Tying her apron around her hips, she frowned at him and furrowed her brows.

“Something wrong?” she asked flatly.

“Did you know about Jess?” Luke crossed his arms over his chest, tilting his head at her.

Ella shrugged, unsure of whether the cat had yet been fully let out of the bag. “What about him?”

Sighing heavily, Luke brushed past her and gestured for her to follow him into the stock room. Rolling her eyes at his dramatics, she went with him. Apparently it couldn’t just be another day at the office. She wondered in the back of her mind where Jess was, but knew it was more than likely he was off somewhere with his nose back in Dead Souls, or escaping with another shift at Walmart. Biding time before he had to let Luke know what happened.

“I’m not stupid, Ella,” Luke said.

Nodding slowly, Ella bit the inside of her cheek and cast her eyes back down to her shoes. “I know. I know you’re not. Look, I didn’t know about school. He only told me last night, alright?”

“And did he tell you where he was planning on going?”

Immediately, she turned her head up to face him again. “What do you mean?”

“This morning, I got a call from Kyle’s parents, about Jess and Dean tearing up their place-”

“Dean sucker-punched him,” Ella interjected.

Luke rolled his eyes. “Nice excuse. I had to write the kid’s father a check! And Jess didn’t even apologize. Instead, he let me know he’s not graduating, and he’s not going back! And we had an agreement!”

Again, she nodded slowly, fiddling with her necklace. “I know. So...you kicked him out?”

“Not exactly. We hadn’t really talked it out all the way. I went out to get some stock, and an hour later, I come back and he’s just gone!” Luke exclaimed, exasperated.

“What do you mean gone?”

“All his stuff, I mean everything he could fit in that nasty duffel of his, he took it. No message, nothing!” Luke watched Ella’s expression fall and the color drain from her cheeks, and he immediately regretted letting all the information slip out in an angry rant the way he had.

Searching the room to focus on anything but Luke’s face, she shook her head to herself, attempting to conceal the way her stomach began doing anxious flips. No message, nothing. Overnight. Gone. “Well...did you know his dad was here? Would he try to go after him?”

Luke sighed again. “Yeah. I told him not to go near Jess, but-”

“You knew before Jess? You didn’t tell him his dad was here?” Ella interrupted, her voice growing tense.

“Look, Ella, it’s more complicated than that. I saw him here last Wednesday. I found his hotel, told him it’d be better to stay away. The guy’s a nobody-”

“Yeah, well, he’s a nobody Jess has been waiting to meet his whole life!” In all her time knowing Luke, Ella had never yelled at him. Not that he was a stranger to her temper. He’d seen it directed at rude customers, mainly Taylor, many times. But never had he faced the fire in her eyes, or the crestfallen look she had. She swallowed thickly. “Jesus. I mean...last night he seemed upset, but not enough to think his father was worth going after. Fuck!”

Soon, she was mostly speaking to herself, pinching the bridge of her nose. Luke softened his gaze and ran his nervous palms over his flannel. He brought a hand to Ella’s shoulder so she would meet his eyes again.

“Ella, Jess is an adult. He has to make his own choices. I know it’s frustrating-”

She scoffed bitterly. “That’s one word for it.”

“But there’s nothing we can do. We have to just...let him go.”

Teeth clenching down on the inside of her cheek so hard she could taste coppery blood, Ella shook her head again. “Serves me right.”

“Wait here,” Luke said tiredly, disappearing back into the main room.

Confusion painted Ella’s features for more reasons than one. A cold stone of sadness sat heavily in her stomach. It was a fight. A fight she thought they would apologize to each other for eventually, and then get past. She’d truly thought Luke would find a way to let Jess stay, or at least to look after him while he floated around in his new high school dropout reality. Instead, Jess had taken it into his own hands. Cut and run. But she had to give him credit; it was the most decisive move she’d ever seen him make. Worry flooded her mind. Jess was tough, but tough enough to brave the world alone? With a father he knew nothing about? How bad was the guy anyway? Leaving his son when an infant certainly didn’t inspire a lot of confidence in his character. Tears stung in her eyes, but she shook them off as Luke returned.

“He, uh…” Luke began, holding a worn book and a CD out to her, “This had a little sticky note on it. Just said ‘Ella.’ I’m gonna assume they’re yours, I know you guys share...everything.”

As soon as she took them in her hands, Luke left the room, figuring she would need a moment. With the look she had on her face, he doubted she would be back to work for the rest of the day. Her heart skipped when she saw the CD: Turn on the Bright Lights by Interpol. She tried to stop the way her jaw tensed with anger, and her stomach swirled with nostalgia. The book was hers. The last one she had loaned him. She still had one of his Faulkners sitting on her nightstand, halfway finished. Apparently, he wasn’t eager to have it back. Flipping through her beloved copy of To the Lighthouse (she knew it was cliché, but she always considered it Woolf’s best work), she noticed how his notes stopped with only twenty pages left. She was about ready to throw the book across the room, seeing the inconsequential comments and questions he’d written, when she saw a block of his spiky handwriting on the last page:

Eleanor,

I won’t get a chance to finish, but I really liked this. I remember once you told me it was your favorite book of all time, and I have to admit I didn’t think it would live up to the hype. But it did. Lily Briscoe reminds me of you. A badass artist who doesn’t need anyone. I figured you would want this back, since you love it so much.

-Jess

Blowing out a furious breath, Ella blinked back tears for a second time and focused on the anger brewing within her. It was easier than the sadness. She refused to have her heart broken over him. Love didn’t exist. Why be surprised when the universe proves it again and again? Ignoring Luke’s questioning looks, she went out and shoved the CD and book into her bag by the door. The rest of her shift, she spoke in clipped tones and tugged in annoyance at the loose strands of her hair. And Luke decided it was better. They could both be miserable, silently, together.

.   .   .

A late June morning found Ella back behind the counter, filling coffee cups and twirling around on her sore feet once again. Over the summer, she worked doubles whenever was humanly possible and spent her off nights sketching in the corner table. She tried to keep Jess from her mind, and though it was difficult while spending so much time at Luke’s, a stubbornness in her refused to let her relent. Though Jess was related to Luke by blood, Ella had worked there and been there for so much longer than Jess ever had. Him leaving wasn’t going to destroy her home away from home. She simply wouldn’t let it.

Lorelai and Rory were off on their European backpacking trip, and Lane was toiling away at Bible camp. Pathetic as it was, Ella simply didn’t have anyone to hang out with. She’d always only had a few close friends. Had Jess still been there, she could only imagine what they would spend their time doing. Curled together on his twin bed reading, or arguing about what they were reading, playing cards in her room with Jeff Buckley on the record player, making out to Interpol albums, lunches at the lake, shifts together day in and day out. There had been plans. But she shook them from her brain and got back to work, blowing loose locks away from her face and yelling orders back to Caesar as they came in. Luke was on register, trademark scowl on full display. Soon, he would be away on a cruise with Nicole. Ella hoped it would lift his mood at least a little.

Though, it was a hypocritical thought. She certainly hadn’t been a ray of sunshine the past few weeks, even on her best days, even at graduation. For her speech, she’d read an Anne Sexton poem and connected it to life. She’d looked out at the crowd to see Lane, but not Rory. And not Jess. Her father had cried a little in pride, which surprised her, made her remember the man he had once been. Fiona had cheered and brought her flowers. Adam had smiled and given her a big hug afterwards. But, as much as she tried to revel in the relief and the happiness which surrounded her, there were pieces missing. Big pieces nothing could make up for. Not Jess, even. Her mother. The anniversary of her death had come and gone, and Ella couldn’t believe how long it had been. Time seemed so warped by death. Some days, she felt like she had seen her mother just yesterday. Other days, she thought it odd she had ever had a mother at all. Even Luke and Lorelai had come to watch her speech and cheer her on, but her own mother simply wasn’t there. She’d done her best the whole day to maintain a plastic smile, but that night, she sobbed quietly to Billie Holliday and sketched skeletons.

For just a moment, she took a breath. All the coffees were refilled, the orders were taken. She had no compulsory small talk left to make. She put the pot in the machine and began making a new batch. Leaning against the back counter, she crossed her arms over her chest and sighed. Across the street in the town square, they were setting up for some new, random festival. She could imagine Jess at her side, complaining about all the expensive, meaningless fanfare. A grinch who had been absent at prom, where she stood as a third wheel to Lane and Dave. The phone broke her out of her thoughts, and she went to answer it, but Luke beat her to the receiver.

“Luke’s,” he said flatly. But Ella watched his weary eyes widen in surprise. “Jess? Where are you?”

Instantly, Ella’s heart felt as though it would leap right out of her chest. She went over to stand near Luke, expression questioning. “Is that really Jess?” she asked in a whisper.

He glanced up at her but didn’t answer. “Really? Is he making you pay rent?...Well, be sure to never tell Liz that…”

Ella watched in excruciating anticipation, hearing snippets of the conversation, fragments she couldn’t exactly string together in a narrative. Was it really him? Over a month without a call, and she was beginning to think she would never hear his voice again.

Suddenly, Luke threw another glance Ella’s way, this time anxious. “Yeah, she did…”

“Give me the phone,” Ella said, holding her hand out.

“One second,” Luke muttered, then put his hand over the mouthpiece. “I don’t know if he-”

“I don’t care.” She hadn’t expected grabbing the phone from Luke to be so easy, but perhaps he was too surprised at her sudden movement to resist. Ella paid no mind to the curious eyes of onlookers as she began speaking in hushed, angry tones. “Jess?”

There was a beat of silence.

“I know it’s you, jackass. Where the hell are you?” she demanded.

Jess sighed heavily over the line. “Venice. I’m staying with my dad.”

“Really?” she asked, eyes narrowing. “That guy who walked right out of your life, twice now, without a second thought?”

“Look, Eleanor, it’s-”

“Don’t ‘Eleanor’ me,” she warned, shaking her head. “Actually, y’know what? I don’t care. I don’t give a fuck where you are. All I need you to do is let me know you’re alive. I don’t care how you are, who you’re with, anything. You just need to let me know, every once in a while, that you didn’t starve or end up lying in a ditch somewhere. Be a decent fucking human being, and let the girl with the dead mom know you’re alive.”

“Okay, I-”

“Glad we could sort that out,” she bit out, her tone absolutely venomous. Before he could say anything more, she shoved the phone back into Luke’s hands, and retreated into the stock room. For the rest of the day, Luke let her tear open the cardboard box shipments with an Exacto knife, her face with an ever-present flush as she worked.

.   .   .

Sat up in bed, Ella sketched the same rose over and over. She was reminded of Georgia O’Keefe, painting her door time and again. Mid-August breeze blew in for her open window, and her back leaned against the purple mural of a goddess she’d taken nearly two months to complete. Her eyes were heavier than they usually would be for eleven o’clock on a Friday. She’d finally completed her first week of classes. And it seemed about as tiring as high school had been. All her classes were interesting, and the radio played some pretty-sounding oldies during her drive back and forth from Hartford, but she was already dreading four more years of drudgery. What was the point of working so hard in high school just to have to go through the whole ordeal again?

Existentialist train of thought aside, she tried to let it fade from her mind, focusing only on her drawing. And the Stevies Nicks record playing. Without realizing it, she sang along with the words in hushed tones under her breath. Her damp waves fell over her shoulder, a comforting smell from her lavender shampoo. She’d wanted to shower in the morning, bright and early before she had to drive to math class. But it was also Adam’s first week of high school, and he’d taken much longer than necessary. Most of the time, they got along pretty well, bonding over a shared inclination towards campy ‘80s movies. But the mornings were an exception to the rule they could always count on. Admittedly, it was often Ella’s own fault. She had the tendency to morph into a grouchy monster right after waking.

She breathed a slow sigh as the phone began to ring, rubbing at her eyes with the heels of her hands. Tossing her sketchbook to the side, she picked it up. “Hello?”

“Hey, Eleanor.” Jess’s voice sounded much the same. It was odd to imagine him all the way across the country, a leather jacket city boy on a hot California beach.

“Still alive, I take it?” she asked.

“No, it’s Night of the Living Dead on the West Coast. Haven’t you seen it on the news?” he quipped.

Rolling her eyes, she let out another small sigh. “Goodbye.”

“Wait, Elle, I know you’re mad-”

She hung up before he could finish the sentence.

.   .   .

Eighteen years old. She was a legal adult but she didn’t quite believe it. Fiddling with her necklace, she laid on her huge mattress and stared up at the ceiling. There was a yellowed water stain on the popcorned white surface. Once in a blue moon, it would leak. The day brought torrential thunderstorms, perfect for a birthday, and she thought she may have felt a few droplets on her already-wet cheeks.

Fiona was trying; she really was. She always did. She’d made a cake and they’d sung her the song. But it simply wouldn’t be enjoyable until she got out of the house. Celebrating with her family just made her feel like she was in an episode of The Twilight Zone where they’d recast her mother. She was still attempting to make peace with Fiona, though. And if it made her stepmother happy, she was willing to endure an awkward hour of dinner.

She hadn’t allowed herself to start crying until she got in her room, saw the picture of her grandmother holding her mother as a baby in the old frame on her desk. So many dead women. And here she was, always getting older. Pearl Jam spun on the record player, but it did little to lift her spirits. She was examining the set of faux-ruby earrings Fiona and her father had given her, still in their small cardboard box, thinking about how red really wasn’t her color, when the phone ran. Sniffing harshly, she wiped at her cheeks though no one over the receiver would see her.

“Hello?”

“Happy eighteen, Stevens,” Jess’s voice spoke, making her immediately grimace. Almost exactly one year since they’d first kissed. “You go out to legally buy your porn and cigarettes yet?”

“Fuck off, Jess,” she murmured tiredly, shaking her head.

“Look, I just wanted to make sure you were okay, since-”

“Goodbye,” she deadpanned, slamming the phone down and flopping back heavily against her pillows.

.   .   .

Her history textbook was still open on her desk, and moonlight streamed into her small room. A long evening of studying had seen her call it quits right in the middle of a chapter. She’d collapsed in bed dressed in her jeans and thick sweater, chilled even inside from the October draught. A throb pulsed behind her eyes for what felt like forever before she finally drifted off to sleep. Her eyes were hot inside her skull, achy and dry, when the phone’s ring split through the silence of the night. Clearing her throat, she rolled over in the darkness.

“Hello?” she said groggily.

“Jeez, I thought you laid off the smokes.”

She rolled her eyes at the sound of Jess’s voice, she cleared her throat again and sat up against the mural. “Shut up, jackass, you woke me up.”

“Sorry about that.”

“Still alive?” she asked.

“Seems that way,” he said. It pained her to hear the smirk on his face.

“Well, that’s the goal,” she snarked in a clipped tone before hanging up. As she tried to drift back into dreams, she fiddled with her necklace, tossed and turned.

.   .   .

She chewed on her eraser, brows furrowed as she read over the same sentence in Paradise Lost for what felt like the millionth time. Mostly, she’d been having fun in her English class. But biblical themes had never been her forté, and a poem which spent so much time recounting the story of Adam and Eve made her want to do nothing but roll her eyes. Her mother had been Christian, though they never went to Church. And she’d heard her father occasionally refer to God or say her mother was in Heaven. But if Ella wasn’t going to believe in luck or love, she certainly wasn’t going to believe in any higher power. None of the religions she’d ever encountered or read about struck her fancy even a little.

The phone rang, and it was almost a welcome break, despite such a sudden interruption. Blinking the dryness from her eyes, she got up from her desk and tucked her hair, falling into her field of vision as she read, behind her ears. She sat cross-legged in the center of her mattress as she picked up, wrapping the phone cord around her fingers absently as she answered.

“Hello?”

“Hi,” Jess answered simply.

She furrowed her brows, glanced over at her small bedside clock. Only four in the afternoon. As much as she wanted to snap angrily and immediately hang up as she had for the past five months, the change in pattern piqued her curiosity too much. And there was something in his voice which felt off to her. “Little early for you, isn't it, Mariano? It should barely be afternoon there.”

“Oh, we’re talking now?” he asked pointedly.

“Gotta keep you on your toes, jackass,” she said, rolling her eyes. “But, fuck it. I’ll go. Leave you to your new dazzling West Coast existence.”

He sighed heavily. “Fine. Sorry. I’m just sick. I thought about going to work but then my Exorcist reenactment got in the way. Something I ate.”

“Hm. California food not exactly up to Connecticut health codes?” she asked.

Jess scoffed. “Like Connecticut can talk. Al’s Pancake World much?”

Ella snorted a chuckle. “Fair enough.” Then, after a moment: “Well, just make sure to drink water. You never drink enough water when you’re sick. Rookie mistake.”

“You’re not exactly one to talk,” he countered.

“What does that mean?” she asked in mock offense.

His tone was joking, but almost nostalgic. “Do you not remember the time you had laryngitis? You tried to come to work! Luke made me drag you upstairs the minute he saw you.”

“I still could’ve been on dish pit or something,” she said defensively. “Besides, that day I finally got you to watch Silence of the Lambs. Not exactly a waste of time.”

“That was a good movie.”

“Good book, too. But the movie was better.”

“Blasphemy!” Jess gasped.

Ella laughed quietly, but was suddenly acutely aware of the distance between them. He wasn’t a two-minute walk away. And she wouldn’t see him on her shift the following day. She cleared her throat awkwardly. “Well, I should go. Gotta finish this section of Paradise Lost.”

“You don’t sound too happy about it,” Jess quipped. She’d said the title in an agitated mutter.

“It’s excruciating.”

“Huh. Thought you’d go crazy for college poetry, even seventeenth-century religious stuff.”

Ella scoffed doubtfully. “Milton couldn’t hold a candle to Dickinson.”

“Strong words,” he said.

“Well, that’s the best kind,” she smirked, then bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself. “Anyway...feel better, Jess.”

“Thanks.”

.   .   .

Lights of red, green, and yellow flashed outside her window, hanging from the gutters of the small blue house. Icy, crunchy snow caked the Connecticut roads, new flurries coming down in sheets. Joni Mitchell’s “River” crooned from the record player, and Ella was warm beneath her blankets. Pencil in her hand, she underlined and boxed in phrases from her new copy of Adrienne Rich poems. She and Rory, back from Yale, had been to the bookstore the day after Christmas, when everything was marked down to clearance. She missed those lazy days together with her old friends.

Breathing the lavender scent of her candles, she felt content but dreaded the end of the holiday break. Rory would leave again, and Ella would have to go back to the monotony of college life. At least, now, Lane had quit her Christian college upon her mother’s discovery of her secret life. She was looking for a place to live with her band, and Ella was glad she’d have her friend still near her, living on her own terms. Ella didn’t hate Mrs. Kim, but knew Lane would never be truly happy unless she was out from under her mother’s thumb.

The phone sounded over the music, and Ella knew who it would be before she picked it up. Jess had been calling more often lately, ever since he’d gotten over his food poisoning. He told her he’d never eat another piece of sushi again. She didn’t exactly know the reason for the increase. Perhaps he finally got a cell phone, could call her wherever he was. If he had, she could only imagine the struggle it must have been for him. He was definitely on Luke’s side of the handheld phone debate. Somehow, a shift had occurred. Small. But it had happened. Though their conversations weren’t exactly substantive, she felt a little less upset each time they spoke, anger slowly cooling after all their time apart. The pleasant memories were coming back to her more easily, as soon as she let him get a few words in. She still couldn’t help feeling betrayed, but at least he kept up his end of the deal. He barely went more than two weeks anymore without letting her know he was still on the face of the Earth.

She sighed softly. “Hello?”

“Hey, Eleanor,” he said. “Has all the noise, noise, noise finally ceased?”

She shook her head. “Mostly. Luke was in an even worse mood than he usually is on Christmas. The divorce and all.”

Jess snorted a laugh. “My god, I’m glad that whole bizarro thing is over.”

“You haven’t been here. You don’t know the half of it,” she smirked, thinking back to Luke’s odd marriage to his lawyer. The back and forth, to divorce or not to divorce, made everyone who was watching dizzy. She heard Jess inhale sharply, familiar to ear. “Are you smoking?”

“Who are you? Nancy Drew?” he shot back.

“I asked you first.”

“Depends. Have you been biting your nails?”

Ella scoffed self-consciously. “Those two habits are not comparable at all. But touché.” She cast a glance out the window when the branches of the oak tree scraped up against the pane. “Jesus. It won’t stop snowing here.”

“Yeah. Here, too,” he said off-handedly.

Brows furrowing, Ella let a confused chuckle escape her lips. “In Venice Beach? Climate change is hitting pretty hard out there, huh?”

A pause sounded over the receiver, a slight crackling in between them.

“Actually...I’m in New York.”

She hesitated, blinking twice to process the information before she spoke again. “Oh.”

“Yeah. Things uh...things didn’t work out with Jimmy,” he admitted sheepishly.

Blowing out a long breath, she bit the inside of her cheek. “Jesus, Jess, I’m sorry.”

“You can say it.”

“Excuse me?”

“You told me so.”

Shaking her head to herself again, Ella rolled the phone cord in her fingertips. “I’m not gonna say that. I just...I want you to have what you want. I don’t...I don’t want other people to fuck things up for you.”

He chuckled bitterly. “Yeah, well, I think I do a pretty good job of fucking things up on my own.”

“Jess-”

“Look, I gotta go. Work and stuff. So, yeah, still alive,” he said hastily.

“Okay. Just...be safe. Don’t get mugged or kidnapped or anything.”

Jess laughed again softly, more genuine this time. “I’ll try, Stevens. Don’t worry.”

[calumsvapor]

wherever you are | c.h

word count: 2357

warnings: cursing

pairing(s): calum hood/reader

notes: soulmate au. the povs in this are kind of weird. it’s 2nd person, but you don’t get that good of a view into the reader’s thoughts until near the end. it’s sort of from calum’s point of view but not really. idk just read it lmao :)

for as long as he could remember, the skin on his chest above his heart was occupied by the small lettering. by the time he entered grade school, calum knew that the letters spelled out the lyrics to his soulmate’s favorite song.

once he entered high school, calum was convinced he didn’t even have a soulmate. surely it was possible for the universe to mess up, or maybe his soulmate died earlier on in their life. all calum knew for certain was that the song the lyrics came from didn’t exist.

despite this fact, he was still amazed by the people all around him, brushing hands with someone they barely knew, locking eyes, and grinning from ear to ear as their markings flashed red before fading into their skin. 

calum wanted to write the songs that people fell in love with. he wanted his lyrics tattooed above the hearts of the people who would bump into their soulmate while rushing through the halls, or while standing in line at a coffee shop. he wanted to write the songs that people listened to on repeat, sitting alone in their bedroom, trying to hear a small piece of their other half in the melody.

the years flew by, and before he knew it, he was writing songs and performing. he and his friends from australia had become more and more popular with each passing month, and their songs were played all over the world. calum’s dreams had come true.

so why did he still feel so empty?

maybe it was because he and the rest of the band were still in the middle of their new album, and he hadn’t completely figured out the lyrics to one of the songs he was writing for it yet.

or maybe it was because everyone around him was meeting and settling down with the people who they knew would complete them for the rest of their lives. even most of his bandmates and crew had someone. michael had crystal. luke had sierra. 

and calum had his guitar and his notebook.

“why do you think you don’t have a soulmate, cal? you’re a great guy and anyone would be lucky to have you.” 

calum sat on his plush leather couch, on the phone with his friend and bandmate, ashton irwin. due to the pair’s single statuses, around 50% of fans were completely convinced they were each other’s soulmates, which wouldn’t be too bad, honestly, besides the fact that his favorite lyrics were most definitely not from an ariana grande song.

“because i’ve googled this one line about a million different times on a million different days, hoping that maybe some singer somewhere just came out with a new song and i’ll finally get a sign that i won’t be alone forever.”

“maybe that just means you have to write it yourself.”

of course. why hadn’t he thought of that before? 

“sorry ash, i have to go write a song. i’ll call you later.”

with a chuckle and an “alright,” ashton ended the call, leaving calum alone with his thoughts. 

after around three hours of sitting alone with his guitar and his notebook, with approximately zero ideas and zero words written on the paper, calum set down his things and decided to find a nearby cafe to take a break. he was in los angeles, after all, and anyone who lived within 20 miles knew there was no shortage of coffee shops.

once calum decided on a fitting store to get his caffeine fix, he ordered his drink and sat down at a small table by the window. instead of pulling out his phone and brainstorming like he expected, calum found himself switching his gaze between the street beyond the window and the barista behind the counter, making his drink. 

hey, just because he doesn’t have a soulmate, doesn’t mean he can’t recognize a pretty girl when he sees one.

eventually, his name was called, and he left the swirling mess of a chasm that was his mind and walked over to the pickup counter. as he was handed his drink, he met eyes with the woman who he’d been observing just moments before. the woman, of course, was you. the cafe was empty, save for calum and yourself, so he had no problem with making small talk - just a little mindless flirting - even if it was simply to kill time. 

“busy day, huh?” he said, a small smirk adorning his features. you let out a shy laugh, and for some reason, calum found himself thinking that if somehow, someway, you turned out to be his soulmate, it wouldn’t be so bad.

“yeah, i’m absolutely swamped. you wouldn’t believe how many people come in for coffee at 2 pm on a tuesday in the middle of a workweek.”

“since you have so much time, why don’t you sit down and have some coffee with me?” calum quipped, the smile on his face never fading.

with a smile and a nod of your head, you maneuvered around the counter and walked over to the table for two calum had previously been sitting at. 

“so, i’m just gonna cut to the chase,” calum started, “what’s your favorite song?”

“if i’m being honest,” you said, pausing, “i would have to say i don’t know. none of the music i’ve heard so far has really spoke to me enough to be considered my favorite song, and on top of that, i’m not really that in touch with current music.”

the bright smile on your face wavered as you met calum’s eyes.

“sorry, i know it’s a really important topic, given how things are, but i just don’t have an answer,” you finished with a sheepish, almost guilty smile.

“don’t even worry about it, it was a dumb question anyway. if it makes you feel any better, my soulmate’s favorite lyric is from a song that doesn’t even exist. just don’t tell the gossip magazines.”

“why would i tell the- oh. you’re famous, aren’t you? i knew i recognized you from somewhere!”

calum laughed a bit at your obliviousness.

“yeah, i’m the bassist for 5 seconds of summer. maybe you’ve heard of us?”

“mhmm! i think i’ve heard a few of your songs. she looks so perfect, right?”

“you really need to catch up on modern music, sweetheart.”

blushing at the nickname, you asked calum for some song recommendations, and you spent the rest of the afternoon discussing anything and everything, right up until customers started getting more frequent at around 4.

“so what days do you work? can i swing by tomorrow around the same time?” calum asked, fiddling almost nervously with his fingers, a stark contrast from his bold and flirtatious behavior from earlier. 

you grinned and nodded happily, then waved goodbye to him as the door swung open then closed again, the bells hanging above it making a pleasant ringing sound.

on his walk home, calum couldn’t stop thinking about you. and yet he couldn’t figure out why. the fact that you didn’t have a favorite song meant nothing. it was just too good to be true. he had lived 23 years of his life, happily believing, no, knowing, that he was soulmate-less. and honestly, he felt it was for the better. he could focus on his music. he could focus on his dream. he was living out his dream right now, and if not having a soulmate was what it took, it was well worth it.

so when he finally got home, calum flopped back down on his couch and scribbled down the lyrics he had memorized by heart before he even turned 13.

he then stared at the paper for a good 30 minutes.

it almost felt like stealing. the lyrics, in theory, were his, and it wasn’t like some other artist had written them into a song yet, so there wouldn’t be any legal issues, but he didn’t really come up with them himself, did he? were they really his to write and record if it was just dumb luck that had tattooed those words onto his chest?

“what do you need, cal?” ashton’s groggy voice sounded from the other end of the phone.

calum had gone about his usual evening routine, then decided to go to bed around 10, since there was nothing left for him to do. but then after 3 hours of laying on his bed and staring up at the ceiling, he decided he needed some help.

“i really don’t know if i should write this song, ash. i have absolutely no ideas for the melody, the lyrics don’t even feel like mine, and honestly i’ve been doing just fine without a soulmate. i don’t really see why that has to change now. not to mention that i just met some girl at a cafe and she’s… i don’t even know.”

“cal, slow down. do you want me to be honest with you? i mean completely and totally honest?”

“yeah?”

“you should write the song. and i think the reason you haven’t yet is because you’re scared. you’re scared that even after you finish this fucking song, you still might not find her. you’re scared that this girl you met isn’t gonna be your soulmate, and you’re scared that you’re going to be alone forever, surrounded by everyone that already met their soulmates, and you’re going to feel like complete and utter shit for ever believing that you had a soulmate in the first place. and i think that’s complete bullshit. you can’t just throw away your one chance at finding someone because you’re scared. that’s not how the world works. now goodnight, calum. think about it.”

with that, ashton hung up, leaving calum in the dark of his room, his words playing like a broken record in his head. and even though he hated to admit it, ashton was right. and he’d put this off for far too long already.

after you and calum’s first meeting, you were disappointed to say you didn’t see him again for another two weeks, and by the end of the first, you had accepted the fact that he just wasn’t interested in you once he realized you didn’t have a favorite song. 

which was completely understandable, seeing as once you hit your 20’s, it seemed like people only cared about meeting their soulmates as quickly as possible.

so you could imagine your surprise when, exactly at 1:45 pm, the bells dinged softly and the cafe’s doors swung open, calum emerging from behind them, swinging his phone around like a trophy and smiling wider than you thought possible.

“hey, y/n,” he said, breathless to the point where you almost believed he sprinted all the way there.

“hey, cal,” you replied, matching his elated expression, “what can i get for you?”

“you can sit down with me and listen to this,” calum gasped, still trying to catch his breath. 

“and what’s this?” you asked, motioning to the file pulled up on his phone, his thumb hovering over the play button, and his other hand holding out a pair of headphones for you.

“modern-day music.”

you grabbed the headphones out of his hand, inserting one into your ear and motioning for him to take a seat. once the two of you had been situated at a two-person table, he put the other earbud in and clicked play. 

once the three minutes of the song were over, you took the earbud out and stared at him in awe.

“shut. up.” you said, no hint of a smile on your face.

calum’s gleeful expression dropped to a look of confusion.

“you wrote that?! no fucking way!”

a look of relief passed over calum’s face as he grinned at you once more.

“yep. took me two weeks.”

“so that’s what you’ve been doing while you were too busy to visit me. i can’t say i’m angry.”

the two of you took some time to catch up on everything that had happened since you first met. you’d been coming into work and interviewing at various jobs in your free time, and he had been writing and spending time in the studio recording the demo you’d just heard.

as the pleasant conversation dwindled to an awkward silence, you finally remembered what you were going to say when you’d first heard the song.

“by the way, i think i finally have an answer to your question. that song is and will always be my favorite song.”

“you really mean that? you’re not just saying that to be nice?”

calum honestly couldn’t believe his ears. he may have been living out his dream of making music, but during the past two weeks, he’d learned enough about himself to know that a life with you was his new dream, whether it was as soulmates or just as friends.

“would i lie to you?”

calum smiled at that.

“no, at least i hope not.”

“i especially liked that one line…”

you then proceeded to recite the lyrics written on his chest word for word.

“it’s just amazing how you can write such meaningful and amazing lyrics. i could never do anything like that. i remember once in like 7th grade we had to write a song about the louisiana purchase or something and it was absolutely terrible. i mean we got an A, but that was only because-”

“can i kiss you right now?”

and with that, your rambling was stopped in its tracks.

“what?”

“you heard me,” calum said, the same smirk on his face as when you first met him.

with that, you leaned across the table, grasped the collar of his t-shirt tightly, and pulled him forwards. calum let out a short gasp of shock at your uncharacteristic boldness.

as the tips of your noses touched together, you felt a strong burning sensation right above your heart. as you looked down, you noticed a red glow, shining through the thin fabric of calum’s shirt. 

calum placed his large, warm hands over your own as you looked straight into his deep brown eyes.

“take me on a date first, cal.”

[old-read-all-about-kpop]

Anonymous:  Yo so idk how many request u have rn and I also don't wanna be like... annoying since I already requested two times but I just rlly can't get enough of ur writing so I'd like to request an Ateez reaction to ur bf/gf breaking up w/ u and ur all emotionally messed up and he (as ur bff (who maybe has a lil crushon u)) is kinda comforting u and eventually even confessing idk let ur creativity flow :) hope ur doing good, have a great day/night!!💝~💎

A/N: Yo so you’re not being annoying by requesting multiple times like what! How could you say such a thing? You’re my first anon (I would die for you) and I appreciate your very existence. I am beyond happy in knowing that you enjoy my writing, and I hope you continue to do so. So, without further ado, here is the reaction my love! 💓💓💓💓

Hongjoong

Your pained cries were the only sounds that disrupted the silence in the room. You clung onto Hongjoong like he was your lifeline, and you were close to dying. You felt like it, at least. The pain that has been inflicted on your heart just felt too overwhelming. 

Hongjoong, on the other hand, was trying his hardest not to succumb to his anger. For the umpteenth time, your douchebag of a boyfriend - well, ex-boyfriend now thank God - hurt you once again. But, this time, Hongjoong was uncertain if you’d ever come back from this agony. 

Your ex cheated on you. After everything you had put up with, the deception, the temper tantrums, the degrading, the possessiveness, the controlling egotistic remarks, he decided to cheat on you on your first anniversary! Unbelievable! Joong knew the guy was a tool but this just put the cherry on the top.

Joong tightened his hold on you, hoping that his embrace would keep you in one piece. He dreaded the moment he would let go and you would crumble like a fragile artifact. 

Joong kissed the crown of your head then, hearing you now settle down to heartbreaking sniffles. “I know it hurts, sweetheart.” He sighed heavily. “If only you were mine. I would treat you the way you deserved. Like a goddess.” He said this in a whisper as he rested his chin on the top of your head. He didn’t wish to confess like this while you were so emotional, but he still felt like it should be stated.

You raised your head up the slightest, gently kissing the underside of Hongjoong’s jaw. “I know, Joong. I know.”

Seonghwa

“After everything I’ve done for that prick and he has the audacity to break up with me? The one who helped him get a job? The one who has been giving him money so he can buy food during his lunch breaks? The one who slaves over a hot stove to cook him lunch when he is tired of buying food?” With each jab thrown at the jerk who stormed off after breaking the relationship off, you tore off pieces of the tissue you had in your hands.

You chuckled humorlessly. “You know what? Good riddance!” You began to tear at the innocent tissue angrily. “I never needed him. I never did!” Your speed-tearing faltered, your shoulders dropped. “He wasn’t any real good for me anyway,” you whispered. Your bottom lip quivered. You finally realized that you shouldn’t have dealt with the mistreatment he was giving you as long as you did. You began to realize how foolishly invested you were in that awful relationship. You should’ve known better.

Seonghwa took hold of your chin, leading your eyes to meet his. His gaze was solemn with sparks of anger and disgust that could easily be assumed to be aimed at your slimeball of an ex-boyfriend.

Seonghwa caressed your cheek delicately as if you were prone to breaking under his touch. You probably were by the amount of emotions you were feeling inside. He then wiped away a tear that, unbeknownst to you, slid down your cheek.

“You know you don’t have to put on this false charade of you being unaffected by that douchebag, right? I know you’re hurting inside, y/n. That’s okay. I know you had deep love for him, even though he didn’t deserve one bit of it. But, you’re human, you’re allowed to love and, unfortunately, to feel pain and devastation. So, go ahead, cry. I won’t judge you. Not even a little bit.”

Like a dam that had collapsed from the strength of the water, your eyes polled with tears before they fell like paratroopers. You dived into Seonghwa’s chest, letting out all the heartache that enveloped your body in broken sobs.

Seonghwa didn’t hesitate to pull you closer to him, rubbing your back as you cried. He brushed your hair away from your face and, despite the situation, gazed lovingly at your face and the beauty you humbly held. 

As he placed his cheek on the top of your head, rocking you back and forth, he sighed deeply. “When everything has settled down, I would love to dote on you and cherish you the way you deserve.” He chuckled. “I think we both know you earned it after that tragedy.”

You giggled, hiccuping immediately after, unknowingly pulling on your best friend's heartstrings. You tightened your hold on his waist before parting your lips to speak the words Seonghwa didn’t expect to hear in a million years. 

“I would love that, SeongSeong.”

Yunho

“Y/n, please, let me in,” Yunho softly said, knocking on your bedroom door. Upon receiving no response, he cursed to himself. He just had to put his foot in his mouth when you needed him.

You called him an hour ago, stating that it was an emergency and you needed him yesterday. Yunho, worried for your well-being, hurriedly packed his duffle bag with clothes and essentials and ordered a Lyft in a matter of five minutes. He didn’t wanna risk keeping you waiting.

Once he got to your place, you two sat down in the living room, where you let out a long-winded rant about your childish ex-boyfriend and how he completely embarrassed you during last night’s date. He assumed you were flirting with the waiter when, in actuality, you were engaging in some playful banter. But, being the stubborn mule that he was, he reprimanded you loudly in front of the other customers. It caused you to be kicked out of the restaurant. You were in shambles, utterly mortified over the spectacle.

And it only worsened from there when you gave him the silent treatment. He started calling you a brat and, eventually, once you got to your apartment, he called you a female dog. That was your last straw with anyone, no matter who they were.

You ended up kicking him out, losing your sense and going ballistic on him. It was satisfying seeing him taken aback by your sudden change in character but, once he was gone, you felt empty. Deflated. You didn’t understand what you did to deserve such mistreatment.

Yunho didn’t help the situation as he snarkily stated, “Well, I told you he was no good for you. But, with your head so far up his behind, I’m not surprised that you didn’t heed my warnings.”

Yeah, like that was what you needed in a time that you wished to be consoled. So, as you tried to keep the hurt and tears out of Yunho’s sight, you hurried for your bedroom. Yunho, quickly realizing his poor timing in wanting to say “I told you so,” raced to catch up with you. But, you were a second quicker as you almost had him kiss wood.

Twenty minutes have passed, leaving you to grow needier for some human contact, and Yunho to dwell in self-loathe. The silence was sometimes disrupted either by Yunho’s deep, sad sighs or your solemn sniffles. Your eyes were dry of any tears. You were back to feeling empty all over again.

“Y/n,” Yunho called, prompting you to look toward the door. “You know why I act like this? I know it isn’t right, nor is it excusable, but, the reason why I responded the way I did earlier was because...I love you. No, scratch that. I’m in love with you. Muffin, I have fallen for you. Your melodic laugh, your gentle tone of voice that could lull a puppy to sleep, your wise eyes, your down-to-earth mindset. I mean, there truly isn’t a thing that isn’t to fall in love with. 

Sweets, I’ve always wanted it to be me you’d end up with. But, until now, I’ve been hiding away my feelings like a dog does its tail when scared. I just didn’t wanna risk ruining our friendship. But now I say screw it. Because there is no way in Hell that we could break up. You are the puzzle piece that I need. We connect mentally and emotionally. What I’m trying to say is...is that...” He groaned, fishing for the right words. “What I am saying is that I want to be the man who-”

You pulled the door opened, immediately meeting the adorable brown eyes of the tall prince. You two stared at each other for a while. But, then, the corners of your mouth slowly lifted into a smile. Yunho slowly exhaled, having had held his breath.

You grabbed hold of Yunho’s hand, keeping eye contact the entire time. You lifted his large hand to your cheek, snuggling into the warmth it retained. Yunho could feel himself becoming putty.

“You’re the puzzle piece that I need too, Yunie.” You gazed up at him, showing him acceptance and love that he has been dying to see for the longest.

He felt like he had finally found the hidden oasis to your heart. 

“I swear to treat you like the queen you are, muffin.”

Yeosang

“So, I seriously can’t go to his house and egg it?”

You responded first with countless sniffles, trying very hard to reel in your emotions. You dabbed your eyes with a tissue as you spared your best friend a sideways look. “No, Sangie. You can’t egg his house. You could get arrested.”

“But he hurt you.”

“And you think the best way to get back at him is to egg his house? He could just clean that crap off.” You sat back into the couch cushions then, fiddling with the tissue. “No scars are gonna remain.” 

Tears quickly welled up in your eyes, causing you to turn away and stifle any whimpers that tried to escape your chapped lips. Yeosang watched you with pity, careful not to let you see it on his face. He knew the minute you do you’ll feel even more pathetic than you already did. You always hated getting doted on or receiving sympathy from others. It eventually led you to shut out your vulnerability, leaving it for the times you are by yourself, sobbing in the confinements of your solidarity.

Yeosang, mustering up as much confidence as he could, grabbed hold of your shoulder and forced you to turn around to face him. You kept your face down, refusing to let Yeosang see you in such a miserable state. But Yeosang didn’t care one bit. He was happy in knowing that you felt comfortable in allowing him see you with your emotions on display, with your heart on your sleeve. He wanted nothing more than to tend to you and your beaten heart.

With a tight grip on his nerve, Yeosang took hold of your face, cupping it in his hands tenderly as if you were a porcelain doll. He rubbed his thumbs across your cheeks, hoping that you could feel his love for you through his soft touches.

“Y/n,” he began before wetting his lips. He took a deep breath in, his nervousness bucking within him like a raging bull. “Darling, you’re so special to me. More than you can ever know. And, as cliche as it may sound, it physically hurts me when you date these boys who don’t respect you. They don’t see the halo that envelops your body. They’re blind to it. Because you are an absolute angel and deserve nothing less than the love and tenderness that you deserve in your life. Y/n, you deserve the world! And...I want to provide it to you. I know it’s probably in poor taste to confess my feelings to you at this sad point in your life but I just felt like I was-”

He was cut off by the feel of your plush lips against his. His eyes were the sizes of soccer balls as he tried to fathom the turn in events. But, the glorious feel of your lips molding into his had his eyes flutter shut. In no time did he recapture your cheeks in his hands. He pulled you in closer, relishing in the blissfulness of finally kissing you. Embracing you to the full extent that he wanted to. He was gonna show you that you were a queen that needed to be worshipped. He was going to cherish you.

San

Quiet sobs and heart-wrenching whimpers were the only sounds that disrupted the silence in your bedroom. You clutched onto San tightly, prompting him to pull you in closer as well. The pain in your heart was overpowering, weighing down on you like cement blocks. The only way to keep you from crumbling under the extreme weight was by holding onto San, who has been nothing but comforting and a great support system.

A couple of minutes passed before your cries ceased. Now, you were just laying on San, thinking of nothing as your face dried from the salty tears that stained your face. San, still being as quiet as a mouse, never stopped rubbing your back. Rising and falling along with his chest as he breathed caused you to fall under the impression that you were on a boat, bobbing along to the calm waves of the ocean. It was a lovely reminder that you were not alone in this awful moment in your life.

You rose up then, causing San to drop his arms from around you and fiddle with the hem of your (his) sweatshirt. He peered at you expectantly, his eyes soft like a puppy’s. You couldn’t help but admire him for a few heartbeats. His face was serene with the slightest hint of sadness. Sadness toward you, of course, his one and only.

He reached his hand out then, lightly touching your face as if not to startle you with the contact. You dipped your face deeper into the palm of his hand, happily welcoming his touch. San smiled then, a gentle one that had yet to be adorned by his dimples.

After a few moments of comfortable silence, San spoke, but quietly as to not harm the silence. “Listen, Y/n... You might not want to hear this right now but, I need to say this or else I will continue to have this restless ache in my heart that I know will kill me one day. 

“Princess, you are a gem. You are a precious part of my life that I cherish with every fiber in my body. I hate seeing you frown. Your cries inflict so much pain within me. Baby, you’re a flower. He was weed killer. He was diminishing your light and that was the most sinful thing he could have ever done to you. 

“Again, you might not want to hear this but, I love you. I’m in love with you, to be frank. I don’t want to ever see sadness take over your beautiful face. If I ever were to be the cause, I would fall to my knees and repent. And you know why? Because you matter to me. Without you," he sighed heavily, "I don’t think my days would be as bright as they are when you are with me.”

Tears poured over your waterline. But, this time, it wasn’t due to how melancholy you were feeling. No man has ever conveyed such poetic words like San just did. No one went out of their way to say such sweet words to you with as much sincerity and love as San did. His eyes, observing you carefully, were gleaming with hope for your answer and adoration that genuinely displayed his feelings for you.

Without saying a word, you let your actions do the talking. You leaned down and wrapped your arms around his neck. Instinctively, San engulfed you with his strong arms, pulling you so close that he could’ve fused your bodies together.

You then placed a soft kiss on his cheek, letting your lips linger on his smooth skin for a few seconds before snuggling into his safe embrace. This is where you belonged. At this moment, you flourished, and thus you wished you could freeze time. You were finally back to being a full-grown flower, no longer wilted, as you had San, your water, soil, and sunlight.

Mingi

Thirty minutes ago, you texted Mingi to come to you two’s favorite spot immediately. And the moment you texted “I need you,” Mingi’s confusion disappeared like smoke as he dashed for the closest hoodie and practically ran out of the dorm. 

Now, as you two softly swung back and forth in your chosen swing, you two were embraced by a pregnant silence. It calmed you more ways than one. It seemed to coddle you, providing you some peace that you dearly needed. The fight you and your ex had was explosive, and it didn’t help that you saw a naked broad exit the bathroom, asking in her child-like voice where the shampoo was. To think that you were gonna be the pushing force for him to change his player ways. All your friends  warned you and told you that you were putting your heart in the battlefield. Your poor, innocent heart.

Mingi glanced at you nervously, unnerved by your cold expression and hard gaze. Upon his arrival, you merely whispered a “hi” before having him sit with you in this annoying silence. Whispers turned to shouts as they demanded Mingi to say something, anything in order to snap you back into reality. He was afraid you were too deep in your thoughts. He knew you did that a lot when you were bothered by something. But, usually, when you felt hurt, you would confide in Mingi the minute you two saw each other. It was almost like an instinct more than it was a habit.

Mingi, finally gathering some courage, cleared his throat awkwardly. You didn’t even blink. That was when he knew you were in too deep at that moment.

Swiftly, Mingi made his way over to you, standing in front of you. But, you were still unfazed by him. He then seized your face, jerking your head up so you may be looking into his gentle gaze. You blinked then, your eyes widening the slightest at how close you two’s faces were. 

Mingi brushed a strand of hair away from your face, his eyes scanning your entire face. Whatever he was preparing to say flushed down his throat like a toilet. He gulped, unintentionally pushing the words further down his throat. He had to clear his throat a few times to prevent himself from choking.

His irises scurried over your face hurriedly, as if they were trying to indulge themselves in your quiet beauty without looking too greedy but also not too stingy.

“God, you’re so beautiful,” he mumbled, talking more to himself than you. “How could someone be dumb enough to mistreat you as if you were some ordinary rock? You’re a freaking diamond, for God’s sake! How does one not know the difference?" He scoffed. "Oh, I know, someone who doesn’t understand true value. But I do and your value goes above and beyond. Because you are worthy and I feel like a peasant as I dream of being with you. Appreciating you. Loving you.” He shook his head slowly, closing his eyes for a moment, and inhaling deeply. 

He opened his eyes. Immediately, they refocused on you like a Polaroid. He blanched then, realizing that his rambling was not in the privacy of his mind. 

You, on the other hand, had a rosy hue inhabit your face. Your hands were trembling. What your best friend accidentally conveyed to you was your emotional undoing. Your eyes became glassy as you maintained eye contact. 

Mingi nibbled his pillowy bottom lip, dreading your reaction to his confession. You just got out of a relationship and he decides now to confess to you? Freaking fantastic!

You inhaled a shaky breath, hesitating on what to say to the beautiful man before you. You slowly swiped your tongue over your lips, parting them the slightest. “Can you help me see my worth?”

Mingi froze, staring deep into your eyes. Your eyes were glossy with vulnerability, an emotion that caused Mingi’s heart to crack. Your eyes held longing but also timidness. The man had to resist the urge to pull you into his chest.

Instead, Mingi bent down and pressed his forehead against yours. Before he fully settled into the position, though, he quickly lifted his head and placed a chaste kiss on your forehead. He then put his forehead back on yours, sighing fondly. 

“I would be honored to show you, gorgeous.”

Wooyoung

You heard a knock at your door, prompting you to hurry to open it. The minute you whipped it open, revealing the silver-haired young man, you broke out in loud sobs. 

“Yah!” Shocked, Wooyoung slammed the door behind him unintentionally hard and yanked you into his chest. He didn’t mean to be so aggressive but, the last thing he expected from your abrupt text was to see you in such an emotional state. You were never a crier. You only ever cried if you were angry or stressed. Thus, Wooyoung’s stress levels were boiling over.

Wooyoung rocked you two back and forth as he tightly embraced you. Your sobs were now muffled but your body shook from each hard cry that escaped your throat. Feeling you shake so violently had Wooyoung’s grip on you tighten even more. You were never the one to have this big of a breakdown. He was getting more and more worried about your mental health as the minutes ticked by. You had a part-time job, lived on your own, had rigorous studies to accomplish at your university, and you had a buffoon of a boyfriend who was inconsiderate and unbelievably rude when things didn’t go his way.

“He broke up with me,” you said in a shaky voice. Your cries calmed down finally, but the condition of your heart was unknown.

Wooyoung abruptly pulled you away from him, his eyes wide like saucers. There was a fire in his stare. 

He took hold of your face tenderly as if you were a day-old puppy. His gaze was soft as he scanned your face, but a flame would flicker alive every now and then as he wiped the tears off your lovely cheeks. He felt the vein in his neck throb. He wanted to punch something. Well, preferably, someone, and that someone was your pocket-brained ex-boyfriend. 

Wooyoung was snapped out of his angry thoughts when he felt your hand pat his chest. His eyes refocused on you, resuming eye contact. 

“Breathe, WooWoo,” you said, a small smile adorning your face. 

Just that smile alone gave him a smidge of hope that you would be okay. You needed to be okay. The thought of you being shattered from this breakup and becoming unrepairable destroyed him inside. You were his treasure, and he needed you with him on his journey through life.

Without thinking, Wooyoung leaned in and pressed his plush lips against yours. He suppressed a groan as he could finally feel the softness of your lips. It was thrilling. Like he was eating a forbidden fruit. And then he almost melted onto the floor when he soon felt your lips follow in sync with his, molding perfectly like puzzle pieces that have been united.

Suddenly, you pulled away. Fear, shock, and confusion shown in your eyes as your face remained as calm and collected as possible. You both were breathing unevenly as you watched each other closely. The silence was deafening.

You were the first to break the silence after a while. “Woo... What was that?” you asked slowly, still in a haze.

Wooyoung licked his lips, trying to quickly get a hold of his thoughts. He felt drunk off the long-awaited kiss. “I-I d-don’t know... I-I wasn’t thinking.” He groaned in frustration, running his fingers through his hair. The layers of thick hair moved beautifully, like soft sand on a beach. 

Silence fell over the both of you like an itchy wool blanket. You both felt jittery, hyper-sensitive, and utterly uncomfortable.

Finally, Wooyoung blessed you both with a break from the silence. “You know what? I know why I did it. You wanna know why? I’ll tell you! Because I freaking love you that it should be considered illegal!” he exclaimed.

You blinked slowly, processing everything sluggishly as if you were a outdated laptop.

Wooyoung continued, pacing. “God, Treasure! You are too good for this cruel world. I just wanna stuff you in my pocket and protect you from all things evil! But I know that you can handle yourself with no problem, which makes me wanna love you even more! You just don’t understand how much my heart yearns for you, y/n. Your beauty, your humbleness, your intelligence, your cute beauty marks that seem to be scattered over your entire body, and your adorable nose crinkle when I bop your nose is just the thing I need to see to decompress. All of those things cause me to have nothing but undying love for you and I want nothing more than to express that to you and appreciate your existence!” He took a deep breath, pausing from creating a strip in your floorboards. He knew he just spilled everything he felt for you in an angry-sounding rant (the complete opposite of what he had in mind when he would be presented the opportunity to finally confess) but he felt like he was getting closer to combusting the more he kept his feelings under wraps. He felt like he was unraveling.

You soaked everything in like a submerged sponge. You felt as though Wooyoung had some type of crush on you over the years but you grew denial. As handsome as Wooyoung was there was no way that he would like you. You were decent compared to him.

An unknown force got the better of you, pushing you closer to Wooyoung until your lips met his. Wooyoung stiffened for a second before relaxing his body and moving his plush lips against yours, coating them with the love he retained toward you like a salve.

You two separated after a while, taking in deep breaths. You two gazed into each other's eyes the moment you opened them, taking in each other in a new light.

“Be mine, please, Treasure,” Wooyoung said, a strong plea in his hushed tone.

You smiled at the nickname, peering deep into his eyes, knowing good and darn well that no one could ever make you safe from mere eye contact like this man standing before you. You knew your answer before you even conveyed it.

“Give me time and I will.”

Jongho

“Are you sure I can’t break his legs off like an apple?”

You rolled your eyes in annoyance toward the repetitive question. But, despite the fact, you had a little smile on your face. “No, JongJong. You cannot break his legs off like an apple.”

Jongho huffed. “But why not?” he whined.

You fought back a laugh at his childish action. “Because then you would go to jail for assault and I don’t want that. Who would comfort me and remind me of my worth when you’re away?” You said the question quietly, blushing against your will.

Upon your inquiry, Jongho also blushed. He tore his eyes away from your lowered face and looked elsewhere, clearing his throat. He didn’t want to have an awkward ambiance between you two so he decided to speak. “Well, I guess that is a pretty good reason not to risk being locked up. But I’m not happy about letting that kid walk around unbruised.”

“Well, I guess you’ll have to deal with it then, huh?” You looked up at your best friend then; your glassy eyes sucker punched Jongho right in his heart.

Jongho licked his lips slowly, carefully contemplating on his next move. You watched him innocently, your mind forcefully made blank for your heart’s sake. You solely wanted to focus on this moment and this moment in life only.

Jongho reached his arm out slowly, hesitating briefly, before laying his hand on the top of your head and then sliding it down, stroking your hair. His actions were comforting to a tenfold. You smiled at the boy, grateful to have him by your side.

“You know I love you, right? More than anything in the world?” he asked, softly. Then he thought for a second before adding quickly, “Well, along with my family, of course.”

You chuckled, looking down momentarily before reconnecting your eyes with his. “Yes, I know.” Your voice was just as soft.

Jongho ran his tongue over his lips a couple of times, almost provoking you to ask him if he needed some chapstick. But, you knew he was only doing that because he was nervous. What you didn’t know was the cause of his nervousness.

He quickly flickered his eyes between your lips and your eyes before seeming to finally decide what he was gonna do. Thus, he leaned in close, causing your breaths to become quite shallow. Your chest felt constricted. The hairs on the back of your neck stood straight up. 

For a moment, Jongho stayed there, his lips barely brushing against yours. It was as if he was inhaling your scent, grasping your existence. Finally, he decided to do something better, by kissing your forehead instead. Your breathing stuttered slightly, causing Jongho to smirk. Your reaction gave him hope.

He leaned back, carefully analyzing your face. You provided him nothing as you kept your expression serene.

Moments ticked on like that as you two remained staring at each other. But it was unnerving as you two seemed to be gaining new perspectives of each other. It was a perspective that revolved around an uncharted territory that neither of you could predict the outcomes for entering it.

You finally woke your voice up and spoke. “Why...why did you kiss my forehead?”

Jongho took a deep breath before speaking. “Well, firstly, I don’t think a kiss on the lips would be appropriate due to the state that you’re in right now. And then, secondly, is because I still wanted to express the amount of love I have for your cute self. Also to promise you that I will forever care for you like the precious human being that you are.” He smiled shyly then after conveying such strong words.

You inhaled deeply, your eyes watering quicker than soil that’s been rained on. Jongho, concerned that he might have done something wrong, cupped your face gently as he looked deep in your eyes. 

“Crap! I’m sorry, y/n.” He threw back his head and groaned loudly. “The last thing I wanted to do was give you more feelings to deal with. Now, look at you. Jeez! What a great friend I am-”

You cut him off, sealing his words off with your lips pressed against his. Jongho yelped out of surprise but instantly melted into you. He let out a sigh as you two’s lips moved together like calm waves of an ocean, fully indulged in the beautiful sensation of your lips on his. No amount of dreams could compare to the real thing. 

Eventually, you two separated, your eyes gleaming with adoration and child-like hope for the next step in you two’s lives. Together.

No further words were said as you two embraced each other, content like no other.

A/N: Yay! I’m finally done with this! 🎉🎉 I would have been done with this one sooner but, for some strange reason, I couldn’t complete it on my phone and had to wait to get on my computer. Thanks Tumblr for making my life difficult for NO REASON! Anyway, at the end of the day, I am done and I am hopeful that you enjoyed it my dear 💓