#i love elves that actually show signs of their age

[myokk]

I had so much fun writing this up as I drank my coffee this morning, thanks for making the templates @kiwiplaetzchen 🥹🙏

A little bit of backstory for Eloise - I’ll do an actual drawing etc etc in the future but for now if you’re interested!!:

Eloise has a brother, Leonard (Leo) who is a year older than her (I want to draw him soon!!) and her parents are both (unfortunately 😔🙏) still very much alive. If the family had continued to the 1930s, they would DEFINITELY have been part of the Sacred 28, making it the Sacred 29 instead. Her father was an only child so he inherited everything, and her mother is Elladora Babbit née Black, the woman who started the Black family tradition of beheading useless house elves😭 (and yes unfortunately that makes Headmaster Black Eloise’s uncle😫).

Eloise was kept a secret from the rest of magic society her whole life. In my imagination, the pureblood families have so much inbreeding amongst themselves that it’s not uncommon for them to give birth to squibs. Part of pureblood culture is not announcing they’ve given birth to a child until they’ve shown signs of magic - normally around 3/4 years old at most. When Eloise never showed ANY signs of magic, she was just their shameful secret. On her eleventh birthday when it was all but confirmed she was a squib, she was burned off the family tree and spent the next five years at a muggle finishing school. Always looking to take advantage of whatever they could get, however, Eloise’s parents arranged a marriage between her and the firstborn son of a wealthy muggle landowner when she came of age.

Her family had no idea that she was admitted to Hogwarts (they cut off all ties to her and disowned her) and Leo, who had always been fiercely protective of her growing up was simultaneously devastated and ecstatic that he could see his sister again. It’s been really hard to repair the relationship though, as there is a lot of resentment that they cannot get over even though they want to😭. And, for as much as her parents dictated everything about how her life has gone, Eloise can’t help but try to work hard to get their love and approval as it’s all she ever thought she wanted. And now that she’s in a position to become the daughter they’ve always desired, she feels a lot of resentment towards herself. She feels as if she’s betraying the young girl who was abandoned by her family, because she wants their approval so badly (it will take a while for her to get over this😔🙏)

In terms of the personality I did it a bit like the sims where I just max things out bc I think everything in the middle is boring jajajaja. But:

Shy: not shy in the sense she can’t talk to other people and she isn’t necessarily socially awkward. She just doesn’t always know what to say and will remain silent if she thinks she has nothing to add to a conversation instead of yapping away (BUT unfortunately rambles and over explains herself to not be misunderstood when she does talk, THANKS narcissistic mother), and normally she wishes people would ignore her. When the Daily Prophet article came out about her “miraculous” recovery and introduction to magical society she HATED it & she HATES all of the people trying to talk to her and befriend her.

Active: NOT active as in super energetic. She just wakes up really early and always needs to keep herself busy. She gets anxious if she doesn’t have anything to do - but, she includes thinking as doing something, and often retreats into her thoughts and doesn’t realize when people are talking to her.

I think grouchy and nice can exist together so with this one I put it in the middle. She’s both simultaneously😭

Aaaand with cowardly/brave, she thinks she is really cowardly for going back to her parents so easily and wanting their love so badly, and hates herself for it (not realizing it’s an accumulation of a lifetime of emotional trauma). But lots of times when things get very high-stakes she will jump in and do incredibly reckless things without thinking of the consequences, although if she stopped to think before she acted she would definitely NOT do them. So maybe brave in actions, cowardly on the inside (IDK)

If you read all of this I love you!! I want to share more about her but this was getting crazy long jajajajajajaja😇🙏

[bg3fandomcritical-reactive]

I love that they didn't make the elves look like perpetual teenagers, but I do think they messed up a little with Shadowheart. Astarion was changed at 39, right? That's very young for an elf, and yet he looks like a 39 year old human. Shadowheart is in her forties and she's a half-elf, but she looks no more than twenty-five. Her entire design is very youthful compared to other companions. Jaheira is supposedly very old for a half-elf (somewhere between 120-150) and while she looks great, she definitely shows signs of aging. Minthara doesn't have a stated age, but she leans more mature based on her design and voice. Halsin is literally middle-aged for an elf, so even though they aren't supposed to age that much, it really suits him. Idk, let's just chalk that up to skin damage - I'm sure he's not wearing sunscreen while frolicking in nature. Aside from the obvious (wanting to appeal to cis men playing the game) why does Shadowheart have a baby face when Astarion looks like he has a mortgage? Rat diet and torture stress perhaps?

Shadowheart is quite young for a half elf, so it makes perfect sense she looks young, it's just that they fucked up on astarion big time. Jaheira and Shadowheart look appropriately for their age as half elfs, Halsin and Minthara are like 350 and 250 respectively so it makes sense they look more mature, but there is absolutely no reason for astarion to look like a 39 year old human. You can't even excuse it with cazador's abuse cause vampires are supposed to not change. The only explanation is that he's just that ugly lol

The actual likely explanation is that larian probably forgot that he's and elf in addition to being a vampire so he should look young and not actually 39.

.

[sotwk]

Nana! I need your guidance!

But how are you btw? 🤭💙

I need your headcanon, where Thranduil and Elrond is a bestie, but Thranduil is to arrogant to admit that he is cared for Elrond. And one day Elrond got abducted by some random dude.

What he would do?!

Love you btw! 💙

Hello, my dear @thranduilswifesblog!

I hope you're enjoying your little "period break"! We've missed you, so it's nice to see you back on here for a while. I was sick with a very nasty cold virus through most of your absence, so you haven't missed much from my blog at least!

Now regarding your headcanon request regarding our favorite "odd couple" besties, Thranduil and Elrond:

What would Thranduil do if Elrond were abducted or in danger?

I share your headcanon of Thranduil being fonder of Elrond than of any Noldor in all of Middle-earth history--with the exception of his wife (Queen Maereth). Proud and stubborn Thranduil never admits his affection outright, but it shows subtly in his actions around the Lord of Imladris, and the fact that he seems to enjoy spending time around him.

In SotWK-verse, Thranduil first met Elrond in the kingdom of Lindon, very early in the Second Age and not long after the War of Wrath. However, they barely interacted with each other because of the lingering hostility between the Noldor and the Sindar. Oropher and his people were not big fans of High King Gil-galad, despite being residents of his realm.

Thranduil and Elrond finally got to know each other better towards the middle of the Second Age. Their early bond was encouraged by Lady Maereth, who shares family history with Elrond and became a close friend of his while she lived in Eregion.

Before fighting side-by-side in the War of the Last Alliance, Thranduil and Elrond fought together for the first time during the War of the Elves and Sauron (SA 1693), which initiated their status as lifelong allies.

I have many more HCs about the friendship between these two elf-lords, but I'm going to skip all that to actually answer your question!

It would take an incredibly powerful foe to abduct Lord Elrond, so it would obviously be a serious crisis that will force Rivendell to summon every available ally for aid.

The King of Mirkwood and his family would be considered Elrond's most loyal and strongest Elven ally military-wise, and I would gladly debate anyone on this opinion.

Thranduil would drop everything to answer the call, initiating emergency protocols normally reserved only for members of his own immediate family.

Assuming this event occurs at a time when his family is still intact, Thranduil will rally all five of his sons to come with him and lead their army to Elrond's rescue.

I cannot stress enough how sending ALL FIVE Thranduilion princes along with the King into battle is a huge deal, and actually unnecessary. These Elven warriors are so skilled and powerful, it is overkill to have them on the same battlefield all at once. It has never happened in the entire history of their family. (You know how Legolas can kick serious orc-ass? Well, he's the "rookie" of this team. Imagine his older brothers and their Ada unleashed.)

In normal cases, only three princes at most are sent to battle at the same time. If Thranduil chooses to muster his entire lineup of sons, then he just wants to prove a simple, angry point: you've fucked with the wrong guy and now I will make you pay to the greatest possible extent.

Elrond in danger is definitely not considered a "normal case", so yes: Thranduil would deploy all his sons for the Lord of Imladris. There is no greater sign of love and friendship from the Elvenking than this.

Unless Elrond gives him a very good reason not to, Thranduil will insist on having the head (literally) of whoever dared to abduct or harm his (not-so-secret) best friend.

Thranduil will still never tell Elrond how much he cares for him. But the message will be received and seen loud and clear by everyone.

Tolkien Headcanon tag list: @quickslvxr @laneynoir @auttumnsayshi @achromaticerebus @tamryniel @friendofthefellowshipsnerdblog @blueberryrock @aduialel @glassgulls @ladyweaslette @asianbutnotjapanese @ratsys @conversacomsmaug @lemonivall @lathalea

For more Tolkien/Thranduil headcanons: SotWK Headcanon Masterlist

[meoproject]

I don't know when I'm going to draw scenes featuring Val's parents, but I wanted to get down a quick design for them. This design will probably end up getting polished more once I actually sit down and write scenarios featuring them, but, you know, I needed something to start with. I was tempted to give Val's father facial hair but that might've made him too good-looking to me, so I didn't... (this is NOT "elves can't grow facial hair" type setting.)

Their names are Vanessa and Tonio.

Talk about abusive parents under cut.

In addition to Val, they also have a son (middle child) and another daughter (youngest child) (I've not settled on names for them yet, Val's siblings aren't very important to the story). In many ways, Vanessa and Tonio are very unconventional elven parents. They had all their children very late in life (the fact they show signs of aging beyond 30s while they have children who are younger than, like, 100 is proof enough!), and they have three children, when elves usually have only one or two. Still, being unconventional is least of their problems...

They are the kind of parents who would never admit to being abusive or toxic towards their children -- they've never physically hit them, after all, and only rarely would verbally berate them... and even then, only when the children deserve it. After all, if they'd behave better, they wouldn't need to be corrected. Busy with their businesses and meddling with local politics, Vanessa and Tonio largely let the child-raising duties fall on nannies and teachers. During the best of times, they were aloof and distant parents who only cared about their children and their accomplishments when it was a good look. And during the worst of times, they were micromanagers to whom nothing was enough, and who would lash verbally over failures - real and imagined. They are not particularly close to any of their children as a result, but they don't mind it too much -- as long as the children do as expected, Vanessa and Tonio don't really care about the specifics of their children's lives.

Their current goal is to be elevated from being simply wealthy business owners to actual nobility. To this end, they are looking to marry their eldest child, Valeria, to the eldest son of a somewhat down-on-their-luck noble family, and essentially buy themselves into the noble house of Del Serenzia.

With that in mind, it might be surprising that as a couple they work together quite nicely, and genuinely care about each other and have each other's backs during times of trouble. As far as personalities go, Vanessa is generally more proactive and outspoken than her husband, but Tonio will back her decisions up. Tbh they aren't really characters as much as plot devices/backstory for Val, so don't expect very deep an analysis into their inner lives. I just know they love each other but view their children mostly as extensions of themselves and as something that will help them.

[loominggaia]

AlyssaCarol asks: Hey! I've noticed that you haven't done a description for these kiddos like you have for both the Commoner & Fae kids. I think it would be interesting to see a description in the same style as the other ones!

Hey you're right! I think I meant to but I must have forgot. I'll just update all of them here...

Humans are known as the "beast tamers". They have a gift for taming animals, using them as tools, weapons, and companions. They're most famous for their close relationship with dogs. This human girl got a puppy for her birthday, sure to be her best friend for many years.

Roshava are the "athletes". The finest athletes in the world are historically roshavan, and while they are very capable in battle, they historically have used their talents for sports instead. This roshavan boy shows off his muscles, hoping to be a wrestler some day.

Dworfs are the "engineers". They are half the size of humans but twice as strong. Their understanding of engineering and natural resistance to pollution has made their civilizations the most impressive in the world, but at the detriment of nature. This dworfen girl is proud of the flower she found, for it was the last living plant on her street.

Trolls are the "tunnelers". Their claws are powerful digging tools and their immune systems are tough, so they like to call the dark, damp, underground their home. This troll boy just emerged from the underground for the first time, and he's ready to terrorize some topsiders.

Ogres are the "heavyweights". With their massive size and unmatched strength, they are feared by other peoples. This ogre girl often gets scolded, for she plays too rough with her little elven friends.

Elves are the "craftsmen". Their sharp vision and long, dextrous fingers allow them to craft all kinds of fine-quality things from shoes, to jewelry, to toys. This elven girl shows off a dress made by her mother and boots made by her father.

Goblins are the "slaves". This species is magically bound by their names. If a non-goblin addresses one with all three parts of their name, the goblin is magically compelled to obey the next order given. This young goblin is watching his back, for his school bully just learned his full name.

Gnomes are the "wee folk". They are the shortest of all peoples, standing only a few inches tall. Despite their doll-like size, this species boasts powerful magic. This young gnome skips merrily through the forest without fear, for she has enchanted a mighty tiger to protect her.

Sirenes are the "beauties of the sea". Their soft, androgynous appearance and vivid colors makes this species a sight for sore eyes. This sirene boy waves to a group of girls on shore, confident that they will fall in love with him at first sight.

Cecaelia are the "ancient ones". This Aquarian species has an impressive lifespan of up to 1,500 years! Their age gives them plenty of time to hone their magic powers, though their alien appearance can be off-putting to others. This cecaelian girl looks like she's smiling, but she is actually baring her teeth in aggression.

Satyrs are the "revelers". They were born for a lifestyle full of drink, dance, and romance. Though some people find their behavior too rowdy and rambunctious, satyrs rarely mean any harm and just want to have fun. This satyr girl is having a great time dancing to music.

Fauns are the "musicians". Though they are the physically weakest of all gaians, fauns are also the most graceful movers, the second-fastest runners, and have the greatest potential for spellcasting. Their sensitive ears also give them a natural gift for music. This faun boy is upset because his parents took his flute away.

Minotaurs are the "barbarians". This large, powerful species may be the slowest-moving of all gaians, but they are also the strongest. Minotaurs have trouble communicating with other species due to the beast-like shape of their mouths. This young minotaur is learning sign language as an alternative.

Centaurs are the "racers". They are the fastest-moving of all peoples and they are quite strong too, making them top-notch soldiers and athletes. Though they are fast and powerful, their legs are prone to breaking easily. This centaur boy is in time-out for throwing his weight around the schoolyard.

Gorgons are the "venomous ones". Male gorgons have a venomous barb on their tails which can poison their enemies, while females instead have a loud and intimidating rattle, which they also use for musical purposes. Gorgons can't jump very well and they struggle to climb stairs, but they do move surprisingly fast. This gorgon girl is wearing jewelry made from the scaly skin of her ancestors.

*

Questions/Comments?

Lore Masterpost

Read the Series

[3gremlins]

okay i watched the da:tv gameplay trailer and some thoughts!

-gameplay looks pretty fun and fast and swishy (i know the crpg contingent will be upset but da2 is my favorite so i'm not mad about it at this point, fast combat makes my brain go ZING. i love bg3 but the combat takes so fucking long, i've got places to be, fam). The attack lines from enemies are kind of interesting? i'm not sure about them but it feels like it'll be a little more involved than dispatching all the nameless, brainless enemies we did in DAI/previously which could be neat? we'll see. the venatori still feel a little weak as enemies to me (like kinda boring, you need to fight someone type of enemies)

-excited to finally not have to choose between arrows and daggers as as a rogue (and the switch doesn't look terribly clunky? *stares at dao meaningfully*)

-i wish they'd shown the other classes a little bit (can we not switch to/direct our companions at all? i thought they said we could somewhere. not being able to switch to them would suck a bit, how else will i know what class i want to do next?*), or even showed the rogue at a higher level for more skillz (just the one's a little boring but understandable)

-would also love to see skill trees? are there skill trees?

-aesthetic looks fairly similar to dai tbh? i kinda wish it was more like the character trailers (i know unpopular opinion) actually, like a new swishy aesthetic for the swishy gameplay (like really reinvent yourself, put your whole chest into it, but also given the reaction to the character trailer i can see why they didn't feel they could/should)

-otherwise, it does look good! the hair especially, will have to see it in cc (have we finally been delivered from eyebrow caterpillars????)

-default rook looks so good! already feels like they have more innate personality than the inkys did (like hawke). -tho i hope we can dye their clothes/gear b/c i do not love the purple/yellow lol (have they mentioned about dyes at all? there's been so much info, it's a little overwhelming) -their voice is hot, oh no bioware and the hot voices again lol like might just do a pt with default human rook??? a thing i haven't done since da2 so that's a good sign (based on the concept art, it looks like there might be a "default" rook for humans, elves, qunari and dwarves which is sort of interesting? maybe they were just playing with it tho)

-already love neve, tho her hat/veil is still weird (it is dragon age, mages have to have stupid hats i guess). good luck neve cosplayers balancing a weird board on the side of your heads!

-love the dialogue wheel but am also biased b/c DA2 = <3 I hope the dialogue choices build up similarly to how they did in da2 (where you'd get unique dialogue options based on how sassy/nice/decisive you were)

-i am underwhelmed by the on the ground city design they showed idk some of the environments feel like stuff i've seen in the other da games a bunch (esp that last bit of rubble with the sliding into the solas area, like it looks very much like the first bit of dai where you fight the pride demon. but i also played that game too much and most people didn't so it might not matter).

-also having us fight a pride demon AGAIN in the introductory sequence feels kinda same-y (i'm sure it's supposed to be a nod, but it feels kind of re-tread). hopefully we get enemies that aren't demons/venatori (or at least not the same demons/venatori). Would have to see more to really decide but it did feel a little empty/dai-ish (negative) in the sequence they showed

-i know they're hiding plot stuff/unfinished things and probably more combat but every time the trailer went to a black screen with white text it felt like an "it's always sunny" meme like "The Gang interrupts an ancient ritual" XD and i could not take it completely seriously

-the varric/solas dialogue does feel a little weird, like i never felt they were all that close tbh (like it feels like the only person who could do that would be a friend/lover inquisitor). It also kinda felt like an Anders-redo to me, like putting the varric/anders friendship onto solas instead? idk didn't love it, but i get why it's there (narratively)

-varric is def going to die isn't he? i kinda hope so, like i love him but he also is starting to feel a little shoe-horned into things/a little overplayed (plus if they have to kill someone, he feels like a meaningful choice?)

-varric still looks weird with really dark hair, like i'm fine with him going grey but his hair was def redder/browner in previous games (hoping it's just the lighting/water?). hc that he's dyeing it for vanity reasons

-curious about the party choices where you take certain people with you, is it like ME where certain people need to do certain things or they'll die? and it's not obvious (like in suicide mission where if you want companions to live, leaving them behind to do a job is actually the better choice)

-the teaser silhouettes at the end there?!?! lets go unleashed, unhinged evanuris rampaging through thedas?!? **

-still really need solas to turn into a giant multi-eyed wolf (and have the option of a romanced lavellan inky talk him down), like we've gotten so much of the list already, pls bioware (♡ヮ♡)

----

tl;dr: i am most excited about the new companions! the combat looks like it'll be fun/fine, i am tentatively excited about the plot (there is a griffon but they did not show the griffon in this trailer which was foolish, i am easily won this way)/narrative beats. Will play for sure, but going to try to not get too excited (tooo late haha)

*like i'm not going to have 1000 pts and play all the classes but i still liked playing AS companions to get a feel for their skillz and stuff

**thinking about this more, i kinda wish they hadn't gone for the same grandiose opener as DAI and it was instead more of a murder mystery type of framing? like the veil's down, the evanuris are loose and they're not rampaging, they're doing subtle nasty things and we have to track them down (kinda like the forsaken in Wheel of Time). that would be an entirely different game probably tho lol

[necromeowncy]

If I weren't so nervous, I'd write this on Twitter or AO3, but you don't know how many times I've read and re-read your works. Without the slightest idea of names and events because I've never played any FF game. That doesn't stop me from enjoying reading your fics and enjoying your character. If you ever wrote a novel, I'd likely read that too.

I don't know - I just felt like sharing this. If it's not too late, I'd love it if you'd answer this. Other than Aedric & his snacks. (Which is really, really sweet in itself.) 51: What’s a nonverbal way they say I love you?

Hello anon, please don't be nervous - because I promise you I am even more of a nervous wreck! :) That being said, this is perhaps the most wonderful message I've ever received; I had no idea my writing for this ship breached containment out of the wolgraha/ffxiv tag, let alone that people were reading them that had no idea who or what a G'raha Tia or elezen even was. I woke up this morning to this anon and I almost started sobbing because it made me so happy. Thank you, truly and deeply. I don't even have the words for what this means to me. But perhaps I'll find some; be prepared for a long post!

I am, surprisingly, currently writing an original fantasy novel, and it means the world to me that folks would actually be interested in reading it. I never know if I should mention anything here on my fandom Tumblr about it, as I understand the novelist world at large sometimes looks down on fanfiction authors. But this anon made me realize I probably shouldn't dice myself up into tiny, palatable pieces in order to find respect in the writing community. So I'll talk about it here:

I'm writing a queer fantasy novel that has the tentative title of This Gift Illuminated. It's still in its early stages, and I have been going back and forth on if I'm going to self-publish or just host the story on my own website for people to read for free. For the very first time publicly, I'll share the synopsis:

The world is losing its magic.  For centuries, the human Kingdom of Meyra had one rule: those born with mageblood, known as the Gifted, must submit to the royal palace to further their study in the arcane arts. These days, mageblood is rare. So when Farin shows signs of being touched by magic, he's sent away to study in the capitol along with any other Gifted, as rare as they may be. He'd welcome this opportunity with open arms, especially since it means corresponding letters with a mysterious magics expert named Elias. The nation that had long given up on magic now has a new hope.  In the elf kingdom of Rime, Elias remains the only person stubbornly dedicated to the study of the arcane. Having lost the last of their magic decades ago, the elves have built a thriving nation with the ingenuity of technological marvels. Elias's many letters to the aging human mages of Meyra have been met with silence and dismissal - until one day his letters are answered by a newly appointed Gifted. Perhaps this Farin is the key to unlocking why both of their peoples have been losing touch with the arcane - as well as save the human kingdom before they suffer the same magic-bereft fate.  This Gift Illuminated is a tale of love and learning in a changing world.

Two scholars in different nations fall in love after exchanging letters for years. They are nerds. There are elves and magic, as this seems to be my wheelhouse, so I'm going to stay aboard the "awkward elf nerd and excitable wizard" train as long as I can. I may post more about this on my personal Tumblr @thewizardtower ! I'm thinking of sharing some of the prose, but I'm unsure. Who knows, I might be brave and share the prologue!

And, at last - your wolgraha prompt! Thank you for this.

51. What’s a nonverbal way they say I love you?

Aedric and G'raha both share the love language of touch. Oftentimes, they'll both be reading side-by-side. Even if they're reading separate books entirely, they'll still manage to sit close enough that their knees will brush, or their shoulders will lean against one another, or their spare fingers will interlace - silent, save for the turning of the occasional page, or the flickering of a candle's flame. Sometimes, they'll sit in each others laps wordlessly. Or lazily comb fingers through the other's hair. Sometimes, too, G'raha's tail will wrap around Aedric, and that is perhaps Aedric's favorite. The comforting physical presence of being near each other does wonders on their healing hearts after their many trials and near-death experiences. Just knowing that the other is here within touching distance - alive, whole - is perhaps the greatest healing spell in all of Etheirys.

[first-man-adams-blog]

I saw this trend going around so did one too. Except for peace of mind and to start advertising it again, I did it for an AU version of Megavos (my selfship with Aaravos) a comic project titled The Fallen Star.

I interpreted the Trust, Clinginess, and Jealousy meters to be about the couple toward each other, not other people around them.

-

Templates found here.

More information on the AU below

First…

Aaravos is originally from a show called The Dragon Prince. He is one of the villains, and probably will be the final boss (how boringly predictable… :/) but I have interview evidence that he is not truly evil and is complicated. You can see that post here.

Because of this information from interviews and on the zodiac sign; Scorpio (which is relevant to Aaravos as TDP characters’ personalities are constructed with Zodiac signs involved) which claims they have a hard outer shell but when they lower it they are the most loving and loyal friend or partner you could ask for…I came to like him, because if it wasn’t for that information I would have written him off as a predictable pretty faced character that’s actually horrible and ugly inside, but fun to watch. I still have small hope that won’t be the case…but I’m not holding my breath on this one.

However…

I thought it would be fun to make an AU version of the show’s plot which I call The Fallen Star (and is a project I came up with and had been developing as of season 2 and 3, but before season 4 was even announced) but have Aaravos be the protagonist and have my self-insert be in it too as his first friend in the story. On top of that, to make it more interesting and unique, the elves in the show are dragons too and all dragons shapeshift into their ‘elf’ forms.

So the conflict isn’t dragons/elves vs humans, but only dragons vs humans. It’s also a situation of humans in the West forgetting magic exists after a while and instead moving into the industrial era with electricity and technology, while the East remains magical and medieval in style and way of life.

As the project went into development it ended up following the plot of the show, but with Aaravos and Meg in the mix it changed up quite a few things. I won’t say much more now, but I can guarantee Aaravos is a truly complicated and not-evil character, and not just because his backstory is tragic and explains why he became a villain like I fear the show will do… (Plus he isn’t even an antagonist in this AU, and I won’t be changing that whatever the show does with him.)

TL;DR: I made an AU for The Dragon Prince with Aaravos as the protagonist, my self-insert as his first friend in the story, and following the basic plot of the first three seasons of the show he’s from, but with tweaking due to making elves into dragons and having humans advance to the age of technology as well as Aaravos being the protagonist.

He is a complicated and not truly evil character here too, and the show’s progress will not change the direction I’m taking this AU.

-

Disclaimer: The profile photos where it talks about each person’s traits were traced and edited from screenshots from the show.

The rest of the art on the template (minus the aesthetic photos) was done by me, but the background of Magic Study was taken from the show Aaravos is from too.

[moontheoretist]

I recently gathered some gasps when I said, “I played as female Lavellan and didn’t romance Solas”. (I romanced Cullen and I really liked my romance, but his issues with magic and singling out the mage love interest is another bag of worms to unpack there, which I won’t do here). I people I said it too were so surprised why, to the point that they assumed I didn’t like him (stating that his new face for DA4 looks hideous to me probably didn’t help with that, anyway) despite the fact that I stated multiple times that I like him very much, simply because I waited literal ages for a companion with whom I could nerd about the Fade all the time. But here is a thing:

I prefer him as my friend.

Is it really that bad that I prefer him as my friend? I know his romance. I watched it, I liked it. It’s really not an issue of me disliking him or his romance. Is my preference with loving him more as my friend and striving for friendship rather than romance really that weird?

Not to mention that this way I will keep my vallaslin without having to engage with endless spirals of disapprovals and just enjoy him?

I think I already said it before in the past, but if there is anything that I dislike in Solas’ general attitude except him seeing the people living in the world without the Fade in it as a world full of lobotomized half-humans he can’t stand to talk to (except Lavellan whom he singles out in very Cullen way, but for a different reason), it’s his attitude in regard to the Vallaslins. He says they are slave markings, and that is true that they once were. But it is also true that they are not anymore. The culture changed. The history of evolution of vallaslins is long, but he just rejects it outright, because he still remembers the times when they were marks of a slave. I am not POC, so I can’t talk about the cultural significance of vallaslins in racial sense, but I am queer, so I can say that vallaslins being now a symbol of prideful elven heritage has the same vibe as queer community reclaiming “gay” and “queer” slurs and making them ours. He singles out Lavellan when romanced, because he is just fed up that Dalish elves don’t listen to him and keep clinging to their own traditions even when told it is false. So he appreciates it when you choose for your Lavellan to yield to his idea of what her culture is, and that is kinda meh to me. It’s a lot as if I was now suddenly asked to reject some part of my queer identity simply because it used to be associated with negative stuff about us.

I can relate to his frustration on autistic level, because it also irritates me when people use or refer to something in a way that is incorrect, so I feel it must feel to Solas kind of similarly when Dalish are all full of pride about the thing that he knows is a mark of a slave. I also can relate to his frustration on the cultural level, because I don’t like when people hold onto traditions to the point of not wanting any change to ever happen, stifling this way their own growth. The issue here is that vallaslins are not stifling the growth, they are a sign of the growth.

And I am glad that his romance actually allows for him to see that he was wrong about the Dalish too. That you can actually tell him off for speaking bad about the Dalish and that you can keep your vallaslin, and he accepts it and says that you are perfect the way you are. This is why we play those games. Not only to interact with NPC, save the world and romance companions, but also to show other people that what they believe is not always right. That their idea of what they think is right is not always good or superior to the ideas of others.

(This also makes me consider romance for non-main Lavellan).

Now I wish I could do the same with Vievienne and show her that her bullshit about the necessity of the Circles is just that, a bullshit. I’d love to show her as a friend Trevelyan that she was wrong about the Circle system and encourage her to strive for a better one. I’d love to put her on the Sun Throne if I was sure that her first act won’t be to destroy the College of Magi. Hell, I think her destroying it is against everything she preaches about “mages needing the place to learn”. Why destroy the College, then? You can have two school systems! Two school systems are better than one! She destroys it simply because she still believes that Chantry system is the only one that knows what kinds of magic can be taught and which should not. It is literally reinforcing status quo, just with a mage in charge. It’s like reinforcing patriarchy but with women in charge, as it sometimes happens in real world (it definitely does in Chantry setting as well). Her destroying the College shows that she still believes that every other way than a Chantry way to teach about magic is inherently vile, evil and dangerous. Mage on the Sun Throne changes nothing.

[fangsanddaggers]

The elf found the warmth on his chilled palm grounding, a gentle squeeze as he listened to the human talk. If he were alive - or well fed - he'd likely have a little warmth to his cheeks as the other teases him.

"Wel... Yes, actually. It's a deeply important thing, most elves never cut their hair and let it grow all their lives as a sign of their age and health." The words come out smoothly, a simple reciting of facts.

Unaware said facts showed just how his meticulous cutting in the earliest days was a sign of his poor health.

"Hair is a sacred thing, as I said. Deeply important, a sign of their inner soul..." He trails off, as if the words pulled him into his mind.

It's sacred, and yet he'd let it go so long without care, had let it all but mat on his head. He'd laid more cards on the table than expected, ones that were so clear to his love that he hadn't known he held. As if the very thought of letting it all go hadn't crossed his mind, neither for the lack of care nor the deeply important meaning of such things to his people.

Had any other elf seen him, they'd either have been disgusted, or deeply worried.

But the love of his life was talking again, seemingly unaware or silently noting the distress away for later. A date. Right, those are meant to be happy events, aren't they? Here he was dwelling on the depressing again, ruining a lovely moment with his near constant misery.

It reminded him of the first weeks in camp, where he should have bathed in the sun and lavished in the companionship of strangers on his side rather than be a menace and cause them all to hate him.

"Hmm? A bit ominous, don't you think, darling?" He purred, finally tuning back into the world, the smile soft, a gentle thing to show his love he was present and content, but not okay internally. "I've been meaning to check out this area. We moved here and I feel like I haven't had the chance to breathe, let alone wander and explore. Sounds wonderful, so long as it's with you."

Alone, he'd never leave the home, especially since Sonaire, or whatever that wretched place was called. He looked to his side, his ever present assistance cate trotting at his knee, sweet Gale the mount for her gremlin of a pixie dragon. All the while his hair shifted, the finally clean locks once more the happy home of a preening hognose. Everything was going well. He wondered where little Nico was, wondering if the little menace had slipped into one of the pouches on Gale's vest.

Roberto would know where he was. Probably.

"I presume you've researched the place thoroughly before we left? OR are you dropping the reporter routine and leaping instead into 'fuck it we ball' territory like your son?"

Fingers lace together, long and dainty with thick and rough. Roberto runs his thumb over the back of Astarion's knuckles as he leads the elf out the door and toward the city proper. Given how close they live to the ocean, it's not even much trouble to walk down to the Lunar Coast. There's plenty to do down there, sure, but Roberto has another little surprise planned once they're tired of walking around out among the sights.

"Oh? So when I offer to braid it I should treat it a lot more intimately then, hm?" Noted, maybe he ought to make the offer to take care of it more often. If he can remind Astarion that they're in this together, maybe it'll help him ease a little. As if to prove a point, he reaches over with his free hand and runs fingers through the curly bangs that tumble free.

"I thought we might walk around the Promenade for a bit, see the sights down here up close. If that's too much we can just walk around the beach instead. I have something for us to do later this evening that's more quiet just to us." Options, even if he's the one initiating the date, he wants Astarion to know he can tap out of things if they're overwhelming right now. He wants his boyfriend to be able to get out and enjoy life again, not deal with being overwhelmed.

[mistergandalf]

my thoughts on the rings of power teaser: overwhelmingly positive. here’s why…

1. first off, I say all this as an avid lover of tolkien, who has read not only the hobbit and lotr multiple times, but the silmarillion multiple times as well… and I’ve read a decent bit from the histories of middle-earth series, too. I know some elvish. I can write in tengwar. I could go a few rounds against steve colbert in trivia before he’d beat me. I am not gatekeeping at all, but I’m just saying I’m not a super casual fan and I know what I’m talking about.

2. LOVE the name. I think it’s really smart to preface it with “the lord of the rings” because let’s be TOTALLY honest—how many randos out there KNOW that tolkien wrote anything besides the hobbit/lotr? instant gateway for more casual fans. and the rings of power? fantastic. love it. looks good on a shelf or whatever. it’s a little repetitive but tbqh no one is going to use the full title, we’re all gonna end up calling it ROP or whatever anyway.

2. the fact that the teaser for the title is NOT CGI, but PRACTICAL EFFECTS, is very encouraging to me. it’s only the title sequence and they’re going balls to the wall? oh man sign me up. keep delighting me. my hopes are high that it won’t be a CGI-ridden mess. blows a kiss to the hobbit I love you very much but you know what you did.

3. the music. the MUSIC. very reminiscent of howard shore—not sure if he’s working on this show, but I have heard if it’s not him it might be bear mccreary who I would also trust with my life. I vibe to the outlander soundtracks on a regular basis.

4. GALADRIEL MY QUEEN. I love cate blanchett with all my heart, but her version of galadriel doesn’t have to be the only version. excited to see what morfydd clark brings to the role. I love love love the silmarillion elves and I really hope we get to see the younger, fiery, passionate side of the noldor elves, and not just a simple recreation of the all-encompassing mournfulness of the elves of the third age. I want to see more elves like tauriel! sure she was extracanonical, but she represented what tolkien showed elves to be like in the silmarillion more than any of the others.

5. the multi-language title video had some TENGWAR at the end, and man oh man that delighted me so much. I don’t actually know much sindarin (my singular failing) but it looks like it says “hîr i chorvath | corvath bâl.” all I know is that “hîr” means lord lmao. so far so good? the part that REALLY struck me was that they took the TIME and the CARE to use beleriand mode tengwar as opposed to later tengwar, which shows that they did their RESEARCH on what would be appropriate to the second age. gives me hope. and to those who complain about “inaccurate translations”: tolkien invented enough sindarin words to cover less than 1% of the english language. you’re never going to get an accurate translation, ever. there aren’t enough words for that. sit down.

6. omg please please please give me sexy annatar (sauron) please don’t make him ugly make him beautiful he presented as a beautiful elf in the second age please

7. to the doubters and the haters, I feel you and I see you. I’m just hopeful based on what I’ve seen, and I pray I’m proven right. I will probably watch it regardless bc I am a tolkien whore but I really think this is going to go great!

[porphyriosao3]

Dinner Party

(A gift for @tamloid, to accompany my short story Arrival, and set in the same ‘verse)  :D

Legolas and Gimli sat at a table which seemed spun of starlight, clear crystal winking in the reflected light of both the actual stars and tiny points of light from gems holding trapped starlight.  Dinner in the House of Finarfin-in-Tirion was a formal affair this night, and everyone was in their finest robes of flowing samite, mostly white worked with gold thread.  Drifting hangings of diaphonous silk shifted and flowed with every waft of air or breeze, and the hall was open to the skies above.  The quiet murmur of conversation was a barely-heard susurrus in a hall that seemed frozen in time.

Legolas was clad in the same clothes as everyone else, loose hair bound back with a fillet of mithril Gimli had given him as an anniversary present once young Durin got the mines open again.  Gimli, for his part, was wearing the same formal clothes he had worn as Lord of Aglarond, heavy, rich fabrics worked with the angular knotwork of the Longbeards and a circlet of gold and garnets.  He stood out like a raven at a tea party.  The only saving grace Gimli could see was that they were seated next to Galadriel and Celeborn; he couldn't have imagined what he would have spoken about with any of the others.

"So," he said, wrapping up a story, "that's when this one here decided that he was offended at how this Varon of Umbar had spoken to me, and challenged him to a duel!  For my honor, mind you, in me own court!"  Galadriel giggled and even Celeborn chuckled, though the elves beside them looked vaguely horrified.  Laughing, he elbowed Legolas who was peering irritably into his empty wineglass.  A servant stepped forward to fill it immediately, and Gimli gave a tiny wince.

"It didn't happen that way at all," Legolas sighed through down-turned lips, cutting his eyes at his husband.  "You always make me sound ridiculous."  He went back to staring into the pale wine in his goblet.  Oh dear, Gimli thought.

"Now now, just silly stories, love.  Got to make conversation with something, aye?"  Gimli caught Galadriel's eye, knowing she was almost certainly in his head, and thought as hard as he could, no more wine for this one, if you please.  Her eyes sparkled as she gave a grin that belonged more on a mischievous urchin than the Lady of the Noldor, but he saw with relief that she leaned back to speak to the server.

"I don't like it," Legolas said a bit too loudly, causing his elven neighbor to glance over and quietly move a tiny bit away.  Gimli gritted his teeth at that, but let it go; Legolas was still speaking.  "He was rude, and he had been rude the whole time.  I thought it likely he was a Black Numenorean - I know the signs, you know, being as I'm old enough to remember the Last Alliance!  Probably was, too, if you'd just let me fight him we'd know."

"You'd have killed him, love, and we'd have been without a treaty," Gimli said softly, patting the long, pale hand beside him on the table with one of his ruddy, stocky ones.  "No need to drag all that out again, it's long gone and likely so's he.  Just a good story, that's all.  So, my Lady," he said, glancing over to where Galadriel and Celeborn were watching this with fascination, "how are you finding your, uh, new location here?  Trees growin' nicely, seemed like."  He ignored the irritable huff from his husband and hoped that the dinner was nearing its end.

"Yes, well seen," Galadriel said with that same mischievous smile, "and your husband's tutelage is showing once again, my Champion.  For a son of Durin to notice trees is a triumph indeed.  Have you been able to visit Fangorn much since we left? I know that was still your plan when we sailed."  Conversation flowed for a few minutes more, as Gimli described the wonders of Fangorn forest.

"... Those ents were terrifyin', I'll tell you that.  I can't feel the trees, o'course," Gimli said, "but even I could feel the age in the place!  It was like comin' into a deep cavern that hadn't been touched since Mahal made the world, that same sense that yours were the first eyes' t'see it."  He took Legolas' hand in his own.  "And then when we got to Aglarond, and my heart could see the caves, I like to think I returned the favor of showin' him somethin' not everyone had seen."  He leaned forward.  "There are crystals of pure clarity there the height of a tall man, Lady.  There are pools of water so clear that the bottom looks an inch below the surface, but that go down a fathom, and gems so clean and pure it might be a shrine to Mahal Himself! Aye, it..."  As he spoke, he noticed out of the corner of his eye Legolas motioning to the server for more wine.  Unfortunately, instead of filling the glass, the elf pretended not to see.

Legolas whirled on Gimli, interrupting him.  "Gimli son of Gloin, son of Groin, son of Farin, son of... son of... whoever!  What have you done!"  Galadriel's eyebrows were halfway up her forehead and Celeborn looked shocked, though the corners of his mouth were apparently fighting him.  Legolas drew himself up and glared, and for a moment it was as though Thranduil himself had appeared in the hall.

"Well, that's that," Gimli sighed heavily.  "Our apologies, Lady, Lord Celeborn, but 'twould seem we've had enough feasting for the night.  Once he gets like his father, no good can come of it.  Be well, and we will see you in the morn, I'm sure,"  Standing, he hoisted a loudly protesting Legolas over his shoulder like a child and stumped off, with the occasional shouted obscenity trailing behind them.  Behind them, the hall was deathly silent.  Galadriel's face was perfectly composed, though an occasional quiver in her shoulders indicated how hard she was fighting not to laugh.

Celeborn cleared his throat.  "Do you remember," he said in a casual voice, "when Melian made a pet of Oropher?  We all..." he stopped, smiling,  as Galadriel slapped his arm in a practically dwarven display.

"Celeborn," she snickered.  "You're horrible."  Leaning over, she touched his face.  "And that's precisely why we're married, my love."  A shriek came from the halls, followed by a wet sound and then silence.  "I think young Thranduilion just got flung into the pool."  Finally the two looked at each other and burst out laughing, ignoring the scandalized looks from the rest of the hall.  Eternity with Legolas and Gimli was going to be interesting indeed, she mused.  But definitely not boring.

[drarrily-we-row-along]

Day 125.4: Accidental Bonding (Part Four)

(You can start at Part One, if you’d like.)

"Come on," Harry begged, the following Friday. "Please come to dinner." The bond had only seemed to strengthen in the past eighteen days and Harry found his mind turning to thoughts of Draco almost constantly whether they were together or apart.

And touching the other man was almost second nature at this point. They spent all day every day touching the other without thinking; they sat with their ankles pressed together under their desks, hands brushed against shoulders and backs as they walked past each other, they frequently held hands without even talking about it first, and Harry couldn't remember the last time that he'd woken up without being wrapped around Draco's body or vice versa. Yes, the bond wasn't showing any signs of weakening.

"Your friends hate me, Potter," Draco reminded him as he pulled a wine glass down out of the cupboard.

Harry sighed, "But they wouldn't if they got to know you."

Draco leveled him with a glare, the kind that Harry had learned to recognize as a shield of sorts that the other man used when he was feeling insecure. "They have good reason to hate me," he said as he filled the glass.

"Not anymore," he protested.

The other man rolled his eyes and took a large swallow of his wine.

"Come on," he said again. "If you're there no one will flirt with me."

Draco face twisted in disgust, it was unpleasant for both of them if someone touched one of them with certain intentions.

"If they're rude, you can leave right away," he added.

"What's in it for me?" Draco asked.

He thought for a moment, "A foot rub," he offered, remembering the night that Draco had drunkenly been complaining that his feet hurt and Harry had drunkenly offered a foot rub. There'd been something immensely satisfying about it, he assumed it was something to do with the bond and not with the look of rapturous delight on Draco's face.

(Read more below the cut)

Draco's eyes narrowed, "And I can leave immediately if they're unkind."

"Yes."

"And you'll give me a long foot massage?"

He laughed, "Yes."

"Fine."

Harry grinned at him. "Excellent. Let's go then, they're meeting us at The Night Owl."

"How did you know I'd say yes?" he asked, looking affronted.

"I didn't," Harry lied, even he'd had a strong suspicion he could convince the other man. "They could eat there without us if you didn't want to go."

He didn't seem entirely convinced but he allowed Harry to take his elbow and he apparated them to the apparition point closest to The Night Owl.

Ron and Hermione were already sitting at a booth when they arrived, and Harry slid his fingers through Draco's as he headed over. "Hey," he greeted brightly.

His best friends both looked up, smiling at Harry before doing a double take when they saw Draco standing there beside him.

"Malfoy," Hermione said, eyebrows lifting. "What a surprise!" she said, glancing at Harry.

He could feel Draco's nervousness like it was a tangible thing. "Yeah," Harry said, widening his eyes meaningfully at her, "I told you he might be coming."

"Yeah," Ron said, "But we didn't think he actually would."

"Well," Draco said, detaching his hand from Harry's, "This has been fun but I'm going to-"

"No," Harry said, turning toward him and grabbing his hand again, "It's fine," he said, glaring at his friends, who he had told to be on their best behavior and to just give the other man a chance.

"Yes," Hermione piped up. "Stay, please. We were just surprised."

Draco looked at Harry for a long moment, obviously arguing with himself before nodding once and sliding into the booth.

Harry slid in next to him, the first (and hopefully largest) hurdle out of the way.

------------------

Dinner went surprisingly well. Hermione and Ron obviously struggled a bit but Harry had asked them to give him a chance and they seemed to be trying.

Everyone seemed to relax a bit once they'd had a few drinks and when Draco got up to use the loo, Harry turned to his friends, "So?" he said eagerly, "He's different, right?"

Ron and Hermione looked at each other before Hermione said carefully, "I think it's too soon for me to tell."

"Yeah, mate," Ron agreed, "I know you've always had that thing for Malfoy but," he shrugged, "it's hard to know what's real and what's an act."

"You do know that he like cut ties from his parents, right?" Harry asked incredulously, "he believes that all of that pureblood nonsense is garbage."

"Does he though?" Hermione asked, "Or is that just what it behooves him to have you believe?"

"He lives in a tiny flat!" he protested. "He said that he was so compelled by your arguments about house elves that he couldn't bring himself to have one for his flat."

"Are you sure?" Ron asked, "Or does he just hide it from you? House elves are wicked good at magic."

"He knows how to cook," Harry said, "From scratch. And he knows cleaning spells," he added. "Why would he have to know cleaning spells?"

Hermione looked at him thoughtfully, "Maybe you're right-"

"Just give him a chance," he said. "You won't-"

"Better talk about something else," Ron interrupted, "He's headed this way."

"Well, I tried to get Lugnok to speak with me about the discrimination that Goblins have been facing for ages in the wizarding community, but he wasn't very forthcoming," Hermione started as Draco slid into the booth once again.

"Oh," Draco said as he pressed his shoulder against Harry's and they both relaxed into the pleasant hum thrumming through the bodies, beginning at their shoulders and radiating outward. "I read the last article that you published in The Daily Dilemma," he said excitedly. "It was fascinating," he added.

"Really?" Hermione asked, sounding surprised.

He nodded, "I always wanted to learn more about Goblin magic but good information is so hard to find. When I was young, I'd hoped that it was something they'd teach at Hogwarts-"

"Yes!" Hermione agreed emphatically. "I have been trying to convince Minerva of that for years."

"We don't know nearly enough about magic that other beings possess and honestly," he said, lowering his voice slightly, "I don't know why any other magical being puts up with us. I can't understand it." He shook his head, "I mean for all intents and purposes, their magic is stronger than ours and they've got better control of it. A house elf, for example," he said, "when they want to apparate somewhere it's just a snap of the fingers. And their blind apparation is loads better than ours," he shook his head, "And that's just one spell."

Hermione nodded, "It's never made sense to me."

Draco swallowed, "I'm sorry about that, by the way," he said, not quite meeting her eye, "for making fun of your organization." Then his mouth twisted, "For a lot of things, really," he continued. "Many that were worse than that."

"Thank you," Hermione said after a moment. "I appreciate your apology."

He nodded once. "You probably know this already, but Henri Laurence is a real advocate for changing the way we treat other magical beings. He could probably help your causes."

"Who?" she asked, brows furrowing as she tried to place the name.

"Henri Laurence," he repeated.

She shook her head, "I'm not familiar with that name."

"He works in transportation," Draco replied.

"Why would I talk to someone in transportation?"

He gave her a wry smile, "Henri works closely with a lot of department heads to schedule their trips. He's very amiable and everyone loves him," he added. "More than one political career has risen and fallen by his words. He also works with the Minister quite a bit, the Minister is quite fond of him."

"I never would have thought to start there. Thanks for the tip," she said, giving him a cautious half smile.

"Of course," Draco said automatically. "I'd be glad to give you names if you're ever wondering the best way to get things into people's ears. I'm afraid I can't do introductions, though," he said with a self depreciating laugh.

"Thank you," Hermione said, sounding genuinely grateful. "That would be so helpful."

Draco gave her a little smile and Harry felt hope bubbling merrily in his chest.

----------

As the evening drew to a natural close, Harry couldn't help but think that everything went exceptionally well.

Draco was still talking about Hermione's current project with the Goblins at Gringotts as Harry headed back toward the bedroom, Draco trailing along behind him. "It's invaluable," he said as he started to strip so he could put on his pajamas. "This research could change the way that we think about other beings. We could really have the opportunity to understand them better and then maybe we'd understand our own magic and our own limitations better."

Harry nodded, "You sound just like her. I thought you two might hit it off."

"Did you?" Draco asked curiously as he crawled into bed.

He nodded, sitting at the bottom and pulling Draco's left foot into his lap, pressing his thumbs up the curve of Draco's arch. "You're the only other person I know who likes to talk about Magic Theory."

He let out a low moan as Harry's thumbs rubbed the ball of his foot, "Potter, you are really good at that," he said, thoroughly distracted from the conversation they'd been having.

Harry laughed.

"I'm serious!" the other man protested. "If the whole saving the world, one idiot at a time thing fails, you can go into foot massages."

Chuckling, he shook his head, "Can you imagine?"

"Yes," Draco replied, closing his eyes and settling further into the mattress, "I'd come see you every day."

"Ah, in that case," Harry teased, "maybe I should think about it."

"You do that," he said, in that distant voice that meant he wasn't listening to him anymore.

"Read something," Harry said.

The other man opened one eye to look down at Harry, "What?"

"Read me something," he said. "Grab a book off your nightstand," he said, nodding to the pile, "And read. But don't pick something boring."

Draco reached over and plucked a slender book off the nigh stand, "I think you'll like this one. He gets everything wrong but it's delightful." He cleared his throat, "In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit..."

Harry listened as he read, a smile tugging at his lips, his chest filling with warmth.

This was nice, Harry couldn't help but think. Living with someone, sharing meals with someone, having someone in your bed when you went to sleep and when you woke up. It was nice to have the sound of someone else's voice and the feeling of someone else's hand in yours.

He wondered if he'd miss it when the bond ended in twelve days.

More importantly, he wondered if Draco would miss it.

--------------

Part 3 | Part 5

[tolkien-feels]

I've had this in my drafts for a really long time, and now it seems like a good time to post it?

My take* on Finrod and the Edain, basically, is as follows:

* As in, pure unsubstantiated headcanons, not meta

Finrod's thing is specifically with the Beorians. Yes, he has a good relationship with all three houses, but Finrod is a diplomat, that's not surprising. The only genuinely close ties he has are to the Beorians

Finrod and Beor? Mutual friendship, straight up. Beor is his vassal because Finrod got his people lands and he felt like fealty was an appropriate response to that, but the power dynamics are similar to, say, Aragorn and Faramir as I headcanon them, in that there's their formal relationship and there's their personal friendship, and they code-switch as necessary

From a cultural standpoint, they're both anthropologists. They're both keenly interested in each other's culture, and it's an exchange, not unilateral teaching. If anything, Finrod asks more questions than the opposite, because the Beorians are somewhat familiar with dark elves, while Finrod knows Nothing about men. I feel like if you asked him, Finrod would characterize Beor as his teacher rather than the opposite - what knowledge he gives them is repayment for what Beor and his people teach him.

On that note... Although the Beorians call Finrod Nom, it's a token of affection, not an admission of ignorance - like an epesse, it says something about Finrod, not about the Beorians

Back to Finrod and Beor... Before they become friends, Finrod actually sees himself as somewhat under Beor's authority, not just because he's in his camp, but because while he'll later learn about mortal lifespans, his first guess is that Beor must be very old indeed if he shows signs of age, and Finrod is still relatively young as the elves reckon it. That matters much less as they become friends, but Finrod is forever likelier to treat Beor like he treats Thingol or Finwe than like he treats, say, his cousins

Although Finrod and Beor, and to a lesser extent, Finrod and the Beorians, have a mutually beneficial friendship, not all people get this. There are very many elves (and more than a few men) who act like they're in fact superior to men, and they expect Finrod also thinks so and the Beorians aren't friends as much as they're a hobby. Finrod could probably be more forceful in pointing out to the elves how wrong that is but I headcanon that (not just for this) Finrod isn't particularly good at conflicts, so he doesn't. Anyway, if I ever refer to Beorians as Finrod's pets or passion project or anything dehumanizing like that, there's a 100% chance I'm speaking from the point of view of particularly mean-spirited elves

As for the generations that succeed Beor, Finrod's relationship is significantly less close. He sees himself as "the friend of your ancestor" so he puts himself a generation (or two, or three, or four.....) removed from them, which is compounded by the fact that as an elf, he sees himself as a Firstborn. He means it with as much love as he fee towards his actual siblings or with his nephew, etc........ but it can nevertheless be extremely aggravating at times, and he doesn't always get what he's doing wrong even when explained.

The Beorians themselves come to have wildly different perspectives on Finrod. As a Hero Of The Past who's helped them find safe lands to dwell, they tend to portray him as they portray their own ancestors - with awe and hyperidealized embellishment and symbolism. But those who actually do meet him (and not many do, actually, especially as time goes on) have all sorts of different feelings. In general, though, the further apart from Beor they are, the more prone to disappointment they are, because Finrod can't possibly live up to generations of legend

When I do like art where Finrod looks saintly or even godly, it's because I think Beorians would portray him like this - as they would portray other important people, like Beor, Baran or Boromir, for example. On that note, I have no right to demand anything because I'm no artist, but I'm begging artists out there to portray important Beorians as Heroes™️ in the classical sense! I love to headcanon that Beorians had a profound respect for the men who came before them

Now a few more specific headcanons

Andreth is friends with Finrod. Which means sometimes they come into conflict, as we know from canon. But they're also... well, friends. It's probably the closest friendship between Finrod and a mortal since Beor, though very different in nature. From Finrod's point of view, Andreth is like a sister, both because of Aegnor and because she reminds him of Galadriel. Andreth, however, doesn't see Finrod as a brother at all, and while they're friends, sometimes she thinks he oversteps boundaries - as far as she's concerned, they're very good friends but not BFFs. She might have welcomed the extra closeness if she didn't feel hurt by Aegnor, though

Barahir sees Finrod as his lord first and foremost. Any other relationship is secondary to that. As far as lordship goes, they are unusually close, but as far as friendship goes, they barely know each other. I would compare them to Beregond and Faramir in that sense. Their relationship is very feudal, more about devotion and favor than about being pals

Beren and Finrod have no relationship. Whatsoever. But Beren is jaded enough that he doesn't idealize Finrod and Finrod is thinking more in terms of being beholden to Beren because of Barahir than in terms of "here is my new best friend." Because of this lack of expectations from both sides and because they're on a deadly quest together, Beren and Finrod quickly become very close. However, so do the other elves who travel with them, let's not forget them! The main reason Beren becomes closer to Finrod than to their other companions is because the two of them share leadership on the quest. They're relationship is very brother-in-arms-y, I would compare them to something between Aragorn and Boromir and Aragorn and Halbarad

You'll notice I have many more details on individuals than on the Beorians as a whole. There's a reason for that. I don't think it's fair to have nuanced takes on Finwean #38528 but flatten generations and generations of an entire people into one unified attitude. In general it's a positive relationship (though with many feudal overtones) but specific opinions depend on individuals, historical moment, etc

[bloededhoine]

world building cause twn doesn't part 12: the hen ichaer

i realize i've been mentioning the hen ichaer without really explaining it, and for that i apologize. but without further ado, let's go

colour code cause i fucking love colour codes - already happened/introduced, probably s2, important background info, stuff that might be in the prequel, extras

series masterpost

general

the hen ichaer is basically a magical gene that originated with the elven sorceress, scholar, and princess, lara dorren aep shiadhal

it can lie dormant or inactive for generations, but when someone is an activated carrier of the gene, they are called a source

sources have an insane capability for magic, it's so intense that without instruction they are a huge danger to themselves and/or others. remember pavetta's betrothal feast? hurricanes should not happen indoors

same thing with ciri's sonic scream.

obviously, the hen ichaer is highly weaponize-able, but it's difficult to put this into theory since the magic is so strong that it can easily kill the person who carries it

most important is that the hen ichaer can open ard gaeth, the gates between worlds. you may remember that the witcher is a multiverse, and the continent is just one of countless worlds

aen elle

the aen elle, elves who live in another world called tir ná lia, controlled at least one gate that they used to get slaves from other worlds

however, this was before the hen ichaer was seriously studied. unicorns are also capable of opening ard gaeth, and were present in tir ná lia, so the aen elle would kidnap them to be used as their world-hopping-genocide key. yeah, the aen elle are seriously fucked

the king of the aen elle was named auberon muircetach, and he was very well known for his wars with the unicorns, who weren't too keen on being enslaved for the purpose of conquering other worlds

the hen ichaer came into play when auberon noticed that his daughter, lara dorren, had pretty intense magical abilities. like, ard gaeth opening abilities.

auberon, lara, and a few other elves began studying the gene and trying to figure out how it works and how to use it.

through this study is how we got the title aen saevherne, which is used to distinguish an elven mage with extensive knowledge of history, science, magic, and, most importantly, the elder blood.

both lara and auberon were aen saevherne, as was lara's husband-to-be, avallac'h, and avallac'h's foster son, caranthir ar-feiniel

ithlinne's prophecy

ithlinne aegli aep aevenien was an elven prophet known for her incredibly dark prophecies that she delivered at totally random times. how dark were they? ithlinne's prophecies were almost exclusively about the death of all humanity and/or the end of the world. she was fun at parties.

anyway, when we talk about ithlinne we really only mean one specific prophecy, aen ithlinnespeath. to be confusing it's usually referred to as ithlinne's prophecy

here's the prophecy itself:

Verily I say unto you, the era of the sword and axe is nigh, the era of the wolf's blizzard. The Time of the White Chill and the White Light is nigh, the Time of Madness and the Time of Contempt: Tedd Deireádh, the Time of End. The world will die amidst frost and be reborn with the new sun. It will be reborn of Elder Blood, of Hen Ichaer, of the seed that has been sown. A seed which will not sprout but burst into flame. Ess'tuath esse! Thus it shall be! Watch for the signs! What signs these shall be, I say unto you: first the earth will flow with the blood of Aen Seidhe, the Blood of Elves...

what does that mean? well, the white chill (aka the white frost) is a massive ice age that has been approaching the continent for years. don't believe me? the white frost has destroyed countless worlds in the past, and it literally cannot be stopped. the only way to save the world is by the power of the hen ichaer.

here's a perfectly frightening visual of the white frost

ithlinne didn't elaborate on the how, but we now know that the only to survive the white frost is by finding a new world and massively evacuating the continent through ard gaeth, which can only be opened by the power of the hen ichaer.

genetics

clearly, the hen ichaer is important enough to literally save, or end, the world, but the aen elle did a famously terrible job of studying it. like, you'd think they'd be good at that, but no. to their credit, it is a bit complicated

first, there are multiple types of elder blood genes, the main gene, the latent gene, and the activator gene. to actually show the powers of the hen ichaer, someone would need to either have one latent and one activator, or the main gene.

let's go back to secondary school biology for a second, remember punnet squares? these fuckers

the letters in a punnet square represent a genotype, or the two alleles that are inherited from the parents. phenotypes, on the other hand, are what you see on the outside. for example, a genotype would be Aa but a phenotype would be brown eyes.

while the main gene is a simple dominant allele (shown by a capital letter on a punnet square), both the latent and activator genes are semi-dominant, meaning that when they meet they create a new phenotype: the innate magical ability that makes you a source.

it gets a little less scientific here so bear with me; this new phenotype is so powerful that it sometimes creates a whole new genotype. so instead of having one activator gene and one latent gene, the two would merge and you'd be left with only one (very powerful) main gene. this is the only single gene that actually has magic and it's a dominant gene, so you only need to have one to have the power.

but, the latent and activator genes don't always combine. you still have the full powers when they stay separate, but it is then less likely to pass the hen ichaer your children.

complicated? very much so. but in practice it's a lot easier.

for simplicity's sake i'll call the activator gene g/a, latent gene g/L, main gene g/m and a regular nonmutated gene g/r. to be a source, the genes you inherit would be g/a g/L, but they may combine to be just g/m. your average person would be g/r g/r and a carrier would be either g/a g/r or g/L g/r.

clearly, this makes tracking it pretty messy, since generations of people can be carriers without having a single source

tracking the hen ichaer

for now, let's do what those elven sages couldn't and track then hen ichaer, starting with lara dorren

eventually, lara met an exceptionally talented human mage, cregennan of lod, and they were lab partners (oh my god they were lab partners) in the study of the hen ichaer.

eventually, lara met an exceptionally talented human mage, cregennan of lod, and they were lab partners (oh my god they were lab partners) in the study of the hen ichaer.

for all the studying, lara and cregennan's own genes have always been something of a mystery. elven mages don't tend to have any issues with using themselves as lab rats, so it's entirely possible that lara and cregennan, knowingly or not, mutated their own genes in their research.

ultimately, it doesn't matter what lara and cregennan's genes originally were. by some happy little accident, the two eventually ended up with at least one activator gene and at least one latent gene between them.

later, when lara and cregennan made their own happy little accident, riannon, she inherited one of each gene (g/a g/L), making her a source. however, riannon's genes did not combine as the elves expected, which made her a little harder to study.

riannon eventually met king goidemar of temeria (g/r g/r), and they had two children named fiona and amavet. i'll start with fiona, who the aen elle managed to figure out had the latent gene, making her g/L r

fiona ended up having a baby with king coram II of cintra (g/r g/r), they named him corbett, and he inherited fiona's g/L and one of coram's g/r.

the aen elle lost track of the hen ichaer when they studied riannon's other kid amavet. see, amavet was kind of a whore. he had twins, muriel and crispin, with the married countess anna kameny. obviously, these children weren't legitimate, and when the angry count kameny murdered amavet a few months later, he was officially childless

the elves did, however, manage to figure out that amavet had riannon's g/a gene and goidemar's g/r gene. anna kameny was just g/r g/r, and crispin ended up being g/r g/r as well. destiny does favour the hen ichaer, but sometimes it's just not meant to be. muriel, on the other hand, did inherit her father's activator gene and was g/a g/r.

let's hop back to corbett, fiona and coram's g/L g/r son. he and princess elen of kaedwen (g/r g/r) had a son, dagorad, who got corbett's latent gene and one of elen's regular ones, meaning he was g/L g/r

muriel married robert of garramore (g/r g/r), and their daughter adalia, the dramatically posed lady right there, had the same genetic combination as her mother, g/a g/r

this is where it gets even weirder

the lovely adalia married dagorad. her second cousin. they shared riannon as their great grandmother. feel better in the fact that it was not intentional, adalia's mother, muriel, was not officially riannon's granddaughter. no one would have even known, but adalia's g/a met up with dagorad's g/L in their daughter, calanthe

for the first time since riannon, the hen ichaer was back, and calanthe's parents genes combined to give her g/m g/r

while it took generations of destiny and accidental incest to make the hen ichaer happen again, now that calanthe had the main gene there was a 50% chance she would pass it to her child, which, of course, she did

calanthe and her husband roegner (g/r g/r) had pavetta, who inherited the g/m from her mother. no one knew about this until pavetta literally created a source hurricane, and was already pregnant

pavetta and duny's (g/r g/r) daughter, ciri, inherited the main gene from her mother and was a source.

sources

it's important to note that a source is not necessarily an incredibly powerful sorcerer, merely a person who has the genetic predisposition required to channel very intense magic

sources, like anyone else, can be bad students, allergic to potions, or just generally averse to magic on all levels except heredity. there is also no way to guarantee that even the most willing source will be good at using magic, in fact it's far more common that they will be really really bad at it. sources are extra susceptible to the chaotic state of magic in the world, and many end up pretty seriously harmed by it.

magical talent tends to make itself known in very emotional situations, like the death of a parent or a war. the same applies for sources, but they have an extra rule: their full powers are off limits until they lose their virginities

now, netflix has not mentioned that rule to be true or false, but i'm going to think of it as strictly book/game/etc canon, because ciri is 10 years old when netflix shows her using her source powers for the first time

the virginity rule makes things even more complicated, as customs about premarital sex are pretty strict in the witcher world (well, among nobility), and the dudes didn't seem to have fast reflexes. what i'm saying is that getting pregnant the first time you had sex was not uncommon. sources couldn't even use, and likely weren't aware of, their powers until they were already passing them on to another generation.

and even still, there is no guarantee that someone who is a source will ever actually show their powers. calanthe had the genetics, but she wasn't a mage. what happened? we don't really know. after calanthe married, cintra was pretty peaceful; there were no invasions or massive upheavals that could put enough stress on her to show her powers. plus, her parents didn't know she had any magical powers, so they didn't give her the training that would develop them, and she was a very level headed person who would likely be unaffected by many of the things that would make another source lose their shit.

[smaidjor]

i know they're losing (Chapter 1)

hi mothers and fuckers of the jury, this fic is a hot mess but so am I, please appreciate it. Also, obligatory disclaimer this is about the characters not the people, all that important stuff.

Some important notes:

1. You will probably hate Scott just a little at points. He has chronic dumb bitch syndrome and there's a whole lot of bullshit going on in his life that you don't see in this fic because it's not his pov. That being said, he's still a bit of a jerk.

2. This has a lot of lord of the rings lore. A LOT. You may be kinda confused if you're not a lord of the rings fan. It's fine, Jimmy's confused too, and all of it will be explained at some point.

3. The chapter titles are from the Last Goodbye from the Hobbit films. The general title is from I Bet on Losing Dogs by Mitski.

4. General content warnings: there is a little blood, and a little violence, and a lot of mentioned death and morbid jokes. If you don't do well with themes involving death this fic is probably not for you. There is also possibly going to be referenced emotional abuse and generally unhealthy ways to raise children, though that will be talked about much further down the line. I will also put specific cws at the start of each chapter, don't worry!

5. The alternate title for this was '10k words of flower husbands being sad'. You have been warned.

Title: i know they're losing

Chapter Title: under clouds, beneath the stars

Current Total Wordcount: 3740

Content Warning: referenced/past character death, very frank discussion of death.

Snippet:

Scott whirls to face him, robes spinning behind him. “I’m fading, alright? I’m dying, now leave me alone!”

Jimmy feels like he’s been smacked in the face, the words hitting him with all the force of a well-thrown trident. Dying? “You- what- but elves don’t die, right?”

“We do. From poison, from swords, from arrows through the throat-” Jimmy’s hands fly to the scar on his neck, the one that matches Scott’s own- “from grief.”

AO3 Link

Actual fic under the cut

Scott’s hands are cold. That’s the first sign, the chill that’s uncharacteristic of an elf.

Scott’s chest hurts. That’s the second sign, the bone-deep ache he can’t seem to quell.

Scott is weaker than normal, and that’s the third sign, the one that confirms what’s happening beyond a shadow of a doubt. He’s fading, Scott thinks as he leans against a wall, trying to stop his head from spinning. He can’t say he’s surprised, not after all he’s been through; in fact, he’s more astonished it took so long to start.

-

In another world, it happens like this:

Scott’s hands are cold, and Shubble notices as he shows her around the nether. It’s worrying, a bit, how icy his skin is even in the boiling dimension, but Scott’s empire has always been cold, hasn’t it?

Katherine notices how long it’s been since Scott visited her, one of his few allies, and she worries, a bit. But Scott has always been distant, hasn’t he?

No one notices or worries enough to go check on him, and Scott fades away to nothing, cold and alone in his icy empire.

-

What actually happens is this:

Katherine has gotten word of the demon that haunts the server, and amongst all her worry, one of her thoughts is ‘has anyone checked on Scott?’. The answer is no, and next time she has a free day, she sets out for Rivendell. It’s not a long trip, not with elytra, anyways, and soon she’s at the doors to his keep.

“I need to see Lord Smajor,” she tells the guards.

“He’s not taking visitors right now.” is the response she gets.

“It’s a vital matter to the safety of both our kingdoms.”

They let her in.

Katherine spends far too long looking around the elegantly decorated downstairs and storage area before she realizes he must be up the spiral staircase in the corner of the room. She’s never been upstairs in Scott’s house before, which makes her a little nervous, but… this is an urgent matter, so she presses on into what turns out to be a very pretty bedroom. Decorated with bookshelves aplenty and gorgeous lanterns, it practically screams Scott.

The man (elf?) himself is harder to spot. At first, Katherine’s worried he isn’t there at all, but eventually she realizes that he’s still in bed despite the fact that it’s a quarter to one, only his pale face sticking out from under the covers.

“Scott?” She asks, cautious. “Lord Smajor?”

He blinks at her tiredly. “Hi, Katherine.”

“I came to talk to you about some empires stuff, but, I mean, if this is a bad time, I can come back later…?”

“No, no, stay.” He waves at the sole chair in the room, which is near-enough to the bed. “I can muster the energy for a meeting, just don’t ask me to get up.”

Katherine takes the seat hesitantly. “I came to talk about the corruption on the server, but- are you okay? Are you sick?”

Scott laughs, a little bitter. “In a way, yes.”

“What do you mean?”

“Take my hand.”

She obeys, confused, and finds that Scott’s hands are like ice despite the warmth of the room.

“Elves don’t get sick like mortals do,” Scott says. “Nor do we die of old age. But we get...heartsickness, you might call it. We call it fading in our tongue- the cold hands are a symptom of that. Our souls are fragile, and the grief of the mortal plane can be overwhelming. If an elf is too struck by it, they fade away and die.”

She gasps a little.

“It usually happens to old elves, world-weary,” Scott continues. “Those who are tired of existence. But any elf who has experienced enough grief is at risk.”

It takes Katherine a moment to process everything, and once she does, she stares at him in horror. “You’re- fading? But doesn’t it usually happen to old elves? Wait, are you old?”

“I’m fifty-five.”

“Is that old?”

That gets a laugh out of him. “Fifty is the elven equivalent of eighteen for humans, the age of maturity.”

“Oh.” She struggles for words for a moment, settling on “How can you be so calm if you’re dying?”

“I’m tired, Katherine. The world tore me away from the people I loved, and..I’m tired of fighting it.”

Try as she might, there’s nothing she can say to that. “Is there a way to reverse fading- to fix it?”

Something pained and raw flashes through his eyes. “Technically, yes. If an elf recovers enough emotionally, it’s reversible. But whatever caused them to fade the first time can- and often does- cause it again.”

Katherine nods seriously, absorbing the information. “We’ll just have to reverse it, then.”

“That’s sweet, Katherine, but I’m dying.”

“No,” she tells him firmly. “You’re not going to die. Now come on, you can show me your empire while I fill you in on what’s happening on the rest of the continent.”

Scott stares at her for a long moment, but eventually he takes her outstretched hand. “Alright.” His hand is frozen cold in hers. “We can try.”

Katherine lets him lead her around Rivendell, pointing out the sights. He’s done an impressive job decorating, like her, and an even more impressive job at uniting the elves and building an empire from the ground up. The people of Rivendell are weary and battle-scarred, for the most part, elves who have seen too much, but the children are bright and happy, and the cyan and gold banners wave proudly in the wind.

As they walk, she also tells Scott about the demon, Xornoth. “The demon’s already visited a lot of people, I think. Gem and Shubble for sure, and Fwhip and Sausage. That’s not even mentioning the corruption that’s been spreading.”

Scott nods. “There’s corruption in Rivendell too. Likely Xornoth’s work. And given that Jimmy still has Vilya- well, I haven’t been able to do much.”

“Vilya?”

“A ring of power. My inheritance from the Noldor.”

“Why does Jimmy have it?”

He doesn’t answer that one.

Katherine leaves feeling unsettled, with more questions than answers. She has new resolve, though, and a new goal: keep Scott from fading. He’s a good friend, though they don’t know each other that well yet, but more than that, he’s a powerful ally. And Katherine can’t afford to lose allies. So while they’re both rulers and busy in their own right, she promises to visit and drag him outside at least once a week.

“I’ll hold you to that,” Scott jokes, but his laugh is weak.

Katherine vows to hold herself to it.

-

The plan works for three entire weeks before Katherine has a week that’s so busy there’s no way she can find the time for a trip to Rivendell. Worse than that, because Scott is so isolated, he has almost no other friends, and many of Katherine’s allies are busy too. She’s a little short of options, to be honest, which is how she finds herself on Jimmy Solidarity’s doorstep that Sunday afternoon.

“Hello?” Jimmy asks as the door swings open. Katherine can see why Lizzie calls him the sweet swamp boy- his confused head tilt is frankly adorable.

“Hi! I know we don’t talk much, but I could use a favor,” she says.

“What can I do for you?”

“I need you to visit Scott.”

Jimmy looks beyond startled. “What- I mean, he doesn’t even like me! I couldn’t possibly.”

“Please?” She wheedles. “I promised him a visitor every week, but I have meetings all week this time.”

He shakes his head, hesitantly at first and then stronger. “No, Katherine. He’d just throw me right out again. I’m his enemy, for goodness sake!”

“If he hates you so much, why do you have his ring?”

Katherine knows she’s won, watching emotions flit across his face too quickly to catch. Grief is what he settles on, and she feels a little bit bad for the ring comment when his voice comes out wobbly.

“I guess I should return that, huh? Alright, I’ll go.”

“Sorry,” she says.

Jimmy brushes it off, saying there’s no need to worry, but he fiddles with the ring on his finger all the more. It’s on his left ring finger, Katherine notes. She wonders if that truly means what it implies.

“I’ll visit him tomorrow,” Jimmy says.

“I’ll hold you to that!”

-

Jimmy isn’t sure why he agreed to this at all, to be honest. Scott may have given him this ring in another world, another lifetime, but that doesn’t mean Scott doesn’t hate him in this one. What other explanation is there for how all his gifts have been rejected, how cold the elf is? Jimmy would be surprised that Scott’s never tried to take his ring back if it wasn’t for how thoroughly Scott avoids him nowadays. Getting the ring back would require talking to Jimmy, something Scott has made it very clear that he doesn’t want to do. Jimmy doesn’t have another use for it, and try as he might to forget flower fields and warm hands in his, he can’t bear to throw it away. So it’s remained on his hand all this time, a painful reminder of someone who used to love him.

Jimmy tries to avoid looking at it as much as possible, every glimpse bringing back the memory of Scott gently sliding it onto his hand, a faint blush dusting his cheeks and a smile on his lips. Even the faint shimmers in the blue gem remind him of how the starlight seemed to get caught in Scott’s hair when they were out at night. The ring had been one of their most valuable possessions on 3rd Life, the rare silver band and elegant forging more than proof of that. Now, though, the ring has to be one of the least valuable things Jimmy owns; on 3rd Life, they were humble folk in little hobbit holes, their most expensive possessions being their diamond armor and swords, but here, they’re kings and lords. Scott probably has a thousand treasures more valuable in his elven empire, so Jimmy’s not sure why he’s bothering to trek all the way across the world just to return this one.

Then again, it’s not really about the ring, and never has been. It’s about the way starlight used to shine in Scott’s eyes when he smiled, his rare, soft grin that was reserved just for Jimmy, how he gave Jimmy the most valuable thing either of them owned. It’s closure, in a way, giving it back. He won’t have any debt to Scott once this ring is returned, and they can both move on like Scott so clearly wants to.

Shaking off those thoughts, Jimmy slows to a stop in front of Scott’s house. It’s grand, nothing like his old hobbit hole, but still so clearly Scott in the decoration and color schemes. Jimmy would know who built it even if he hadn’t known Scott lived in these mountains.

“I’m here to visit Scott,” he says to the guard stationed outside.

They raise an eyebrow, presumably at the familiar way he refers to Scott. “On formal business or personal?”

“Personal? Sort of? I mean, I don’t have any diplomatic reason for being here.” Truth be told, he has no reason to be here at all, really, but...the ring.

“Then Lord Smajor cannot see you.”

Jimmy grits his teeth, suddenly furious at this whole ordeal. “Then tell Lord Smajor that I need to return his ring.”

“May I see it?”

He sticks his hand out obligingly, and the guard examines the ring, surprise blooming across their face. “I did not realize my Lord had lent you Vilya! My apologies, Lord Codfather, I see the alliance between our kingdoms is stronger than I had assumed. You may pass.”

Vilya? “Thank you, gentle, uh, gentleperson!”

The guard dips their head slightly as he walks by, a gesture of respect that he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to. He shakes off the strangeness of the interaction, though, pushing open the door to Scott’s house.

The inside is beautiful, exactly the kind of decor Scott loves...and empty. There’s no one in the spacious kitchen, the storage room, or anywhere else for that matter. Jimmy’s seconds from giving up and going home when he realizes that there are stairs up to the balcony above. That’s where he goes, finding himself in Scott’s bedroom.

Which is awkward, to say the least. It’s not like they never slept in the same room when they were married, but now that there’s this awkward, painful distance between them, Jimmy feels like he’s intruding. What’s worse is, Scott’s still in bed, laying on his side with his face tilted away from Jimmy’s awkward entrance.

“Hello, Jimmy.”

Jimmy half-jumps, not expecting that. “How’d you know it was me?”

Scott rolls over to face him, and Jimmy notes that his face is too pale for it to be natural or healthy. “Do you think I could ever forget the sound of your footsteps?” He goes on before Jimmy can answer. “What are you doing here?”

“Katherine asked me to visit, I’m not sure why, but...here I am. Say, why is she visiting every week?”

Scott’s laugh is bitter. “Katherine thinks she can save me.”

“Save you from what?” Jimmy asks, concerned despite himself.

His (ex?)husband doesn’t reply.

“Save you from what?” Jimmy presses, and gets no answer yet again.

Instead, Scott sits up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “You should go.” He stands, and immediately stumbles, Jimmy rushing to steady him on instinct. Scott’s hands are like ice when he grips Jimmy’s arm to regain his balance, taking several deep breaths, and Jimmy’s instantly struck by how wrong that feels. Scott’s hands were always warm, even on the coldest nights in 3rd life. Some elven thing, probably, that Scott didn’t want to talk about or have time to explain to a silly human like Jimmy.

“Scott, what is going on?”

The elf brushes him off again, heading for the stairs, but the regal effect is ruined by how hard he has to grip the railing.

“Scott, seriously! Answer me, are you okay? What’s happening?”

Scott whirls to face him, robes spinning behind him. “I’m fading, alright? I’m dying, now leave me alone!”

Jimmy feels like he’s been smacked in the face, the words hitting him with all the force of a well-thrown trident. Dying? “You- what- but elves don’t die, right?”

“We do. From poison, from swords, from arrows through the throat-” Jimmy’s hands fly to the scar on his neck, the one that matches Scott’s own- “from grief.” Scott turns back to the stairs. “Come on. If you’re not going to leave, I might as well show you around.”

Jimmy follows, reluctantly, trying to think of something to say that isn’t incoherent sputtering with a bit of ‘why do you hate me now’ added in. “You can’t just drop something like that on a man, you know!”

“You did ask, to be fair.”

Why oh why is he so stupid around Scott? “I guess so, but- but still, dude.”

Scott pushes open the side door, holding it for Jimmy. “Here.”

Jimmy nods and slips through the door.  “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

They start along the path, Scott walking far too quickly for Jimmy’s comfort given how terrible the elf’s balance is currently. He nearly has to jog to keep up, irritatingly, but at least they aren’t snapping at each other for a few precious moments.

Of course, Jimmy has to go and ruin that. “So, uh..are we going to talk about 3rd life?” He has to hear it from Scott’s own lips that he remembers, that it affected him even half as much as it’s affected Jimmy.

“No.”

“Why not? We need to talk about it some time-”

“I said no .”

“It’s literally killing you to not talk about it!”

Scott freezes, face going icy calm in the way Jimmy knows means he’s actually upset. The elf’s hands grip the fabric of his robes tight, his back going rigid. This is a bad idea, Jimmy knows.

He’s in too deep to back out now, though, the pent-up hurt of the past few months all coming out in a rush. “Tell me I’m wrong, Scott! I dare you, tell me I’m wrong! Tell me you never cared about me, tell me you didn’t bother to bury me, tell me it didn’t hurt even a little when I died! Tell me I was just stupid little Jimmy, a toy for an elf who’d live far beyond my lifespan! Tell me whatever, just tell me the truth! ”

Scott breathes out slowly, fury gradually building on his face. “Fine. You want to know what happened after you died? You want to hear about me screaming until my throat went raw? You want to know that I kissed your face and sobbed and begged you to wake up, over and over until I couldn’t speak at all? You want to live with the knowledge that Grian had to physically pull me away from your body? Is that what you want to hear, Jimmy ?”

Jimmy’s name on Scott’s lips punches all the remaining air out of him, sounding so wrong in that angry, bitter tone. Beneath all the rage, Scott sounds wrecked , and the fight leaves Jimmy’s body abruptly. “No,” he says softly. “That’s not what I want to hear, not at all. I’d rather you be happy than love me.”

Silence follows those words, only the faint sound of a waterfall in the distance there to break it.

“I buried you on the hill above our houses,” Scott says finally. “I planted a poppy over your grave.”

“Oh.”

“Grian came over the next day. I didn’t want to see anyone who wasn’t you, but I let him in because I had to. He helped me do the straps on my armor and asked me if he could do anything else to make things easier. I told him to bury me next to you.”

Jimmy swallows hard. “Did he?”

“How would I know?” Scott’s tone softens, just a little. “Grian was honorable enough, though, loyal to his allies. I like to think he did.”

“He was a good guy,” Jimmy agrees. “A little bit bloodthirsty, I guess, but good. I don’t suppose he survived any better than the rest of us, though maybe being bloodthirsty helped.”

“Maybe.”

“Can I- can I ask you why you hate me so much now? I mean, if you mourned me in third life and all.”

Scott turns away again, starting down the path a second time. He’s not looking at Jimmy when he says “I don’t hate you.”

“You don’t?” It’s a shock, honestly, given that this is the first time the two of them have really spoken since the beginning of empires. “But you burned the pufferfish-”

“I didn’t. I kept it.” Scott still won’t look at him. “I never hated you. I don’t think I’m capable of it.”

“Then why do you keep avoiding me?”

“I’ve been kind of busy dying,” Scott says dryly, and Jimmy doesn’t even realize it’s a joke until he looks over at Scott’s wry little grin.

“Scott! That’s not funny!” He scolds, aghast.

“It was a little funny.”

“No!”

Scott must hear the genuine distress in Jimmy’s voice because he drops the act. “Jimmy, I’m an elf. I won’t live far beyond you, but only because I’ll fade without you.”

“So your solution is to isolate yourself and fade now?” Jimmy demands.

“It does sound stupid when you put it like that, doesn’t it? But I lost you once, and I don’t think I could bear it again.”

Jimmy wants to argue, wants to fight him on this, but there’s nothing he can say. Instead, he puts a hand on Scott’s arm to stop him walking any further. Scott turns to look at him, seemingly startled, and Jimmy throws his arms around the elf.

Scott stiffens before slowly relaxing, arms coming up to wrap around Jimmy in return. It’s not as natural a gesture as it used to be, but it’s warm, gentle in a way Jimmy thought he’d never get again. It reminds him of the soft, starry-eyed boy who put flowers in his hair and laughed at him over a cake. Scott will never be that soft again and Jimmy will never be unscarred, but they’re here. They’re alive, that has to count for something.

Scott pulls back, his expression so achingly tender and heartbroken all at once. “I’m sorry, Jimmy.” His voice is raw, a little shaky. “I can’t. Not again.”

“But-”

He’s cut off by Scott shaking his head. “Losing you will destroy me. We dared to love, and now all we can do now is lessen the pain when it all comes crashing down.”

Jimmy’s in too much shock to speak, the ache in his heart returning tenfold as Scott turns back towards the house.

“Goodbye, Jimmy.” He sweeps away, elegant as ever, but stumbles and nearly falls as he reaches the door. Jimmy’s not there to catch him.

Jimmy stumbles home in a daze. It's somewhat of a miracle that no mob manages to kill him, honestly. To be so close to a resolution, to have the person he wanted most right there in his arms, and then to have all that ripped away- he can’t think of anything that could have hurt more. Even his deaths were less painful than this- at least an arrow through the throat is quicker than feeling like your heart is being ripped out through your ribs, Jimmy thinks, a little bitter. He throws Scott’s stupid ring in a pool in the swamp, watching as it sinks to the bottom of the shallow water with hardly a bubble.

Wait.

The ring.

It’s significant, somehow, according to a Rivendell guard, and more than that, it’s an excuse to see Scott again. One last chance to change his mind about the stupid plan that’s literally killing him.

Jimmy dives in without thinking, scrabbling around until his fingers close around the smooth stone and thin band. When he pulls it out, the gem glitters in the starlight even under the layers of dirt, and it looks like something special. It looks like hope.