#i looked up the record it is indeed him
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mikurulucky · 11 months ago
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So, apparently, Kei Tomiyama had a music single of some sort in 1979 with two music tracks. One of the voices of my f/o (and my favorite va of his at that) could actually sing??
I'm... almost too nervous to actually listen to it. One of the songs did end up on youtube.... I don't think my heart can take it. o//.//o
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batboyblog · 7 days ago
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Copy Right and Public Domain in 2025!
It's January 1st 2025 which means it's my favorite unsung holiday! Public Domain Day! This is the day once a year when, in the US, copyrights expire and things enter the public domain, meaning they belong to everyone! even you, Steve!
American copyright for books, movies, art work, and musical compositions (but not recordings, more on that later) runs for 95 years (way too long!) so today works published in 1929 join us in the public domain.
So whats free? so glad you asked.
Popeye the Sailor Man
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Many people assume Popeye originated as a cartoon character but thats not true, he comes from a comic strip. The strip was called Thimble Theatre and Popeye was something of a late addition. Thimble Theatre was first published in 1919, so Popeye's girlfriend Olive Oyl has been in the public domain since before the big 20 year copyright freeze of 1998-2019. Popeye first appeared as a minor character 10 years into the strip's run but was so popular he soon took over and the strip would be renamed Popeye less than 5 years later. Now as always whats public is only what appears in 1929, later developments, remain copyrighted. Such as, while Popeye always had super strength its not till 1932 his superpowers were tied to eating spinach, and Olive Oyl originally had a different boyfriend named Ham Gravy, who she dumped for Popeye when he became the main character. It looks like Popeye is following tradition for famous now public domain characters and getting a quicky horror movie this year.
Tintin!
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This is personally very exciting as someone who grew up with the Belgian boy detective. Like Popeye I expect a lot of people don't know that Tintin started off as a weekly comic strip. Indeed Tintin appeared as a part of a weekly youth supplement in the Catholic newspaper The Twentieth Century. Any ways, Tintin was first published in there in January 1929, and soon would start what would become the first Tintin story, Tintin in the Land of the Soviets. Now only part of Tintin in the Land of the Soviets was published in 1929, the story line wrapped up in May 1930, so only those 1929 stories and what appears in them is free and clear and Tintin was published in black and white not color. Tintin's author Hergé had no idea what he was doing and was really learning on the job so In The Land of the Soviets is generally seen as his weakest outing and the only one he never opted to redraw in later years. Even so it's nice to see the character free in the world. No word on if Tintin will star in a horror movie.
Buck Rogers (but not really)
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The original futuristic space man was published, again a comic strip, in 1929 which means he should enter the public domain today, but he won't. That's because he already is public domain! Before the Copyright Act of 1976 copyright was 28 years with the option to renew for another 28 years. The copyright on the original comic strips was not renewed so ran out at the end of 28 years, 1958. So Buck Rogers has been free and clear for close to 70 years now, whatever you hear about him today.
What else?
Famously last year Mickey Mouse entered the public domain, but all the entered public domain was one (maybe two) animated short, Steamboat Willie. Well this year a dozen Mickey Mouse animated shorts enter the public domain, including the first time Mickey has his iconic white gloves, and the first time Mickey speaks (the first thing Mickey Mouse ever says, voiced by Walt Disney himself, is "Hot dogs! Hot dogs!" in case you were wondering) This will give creators much more to work with if they want to use Mickey in their works which is exciting.
Speaking of Walt Disney, The Skeleton Dance is entering public domain, you likely don't know the title but I suspect you've seen at least part of it at some point
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so look for this showing up on TVs in the backgrounds of films and TV shows in the next year or so
Books
The iconic novels of World War I, Ernest Hemingway's A Farewell to Arms and Erich Maria Remarque's All Quiet on the Western Front enter public domain. In fact All Quiet on the Western Front entered public domain last year, but only in the original German, the 1929 translation by Arthur Wesley Wheen is whats entered the public domain now. John Steinbeck's first novel, Cup of Gold, William Faulkner's The Sound and the Fury, Virginia Woolf's A Room of One's Own, and Agatha Christie's Seven Dials Mystery (always get an Agatha Christie novel on this list for the rest of our lives). Dashiell Hammett published both Red Harvest and The Maltese Falcon, later made into one of the greatest films of all time, in 1929. Future children's book author E. B. White (who's go on to write Charlotte's Web and Stuart Little) and future New Yorker cartoonist and humorist James Thurber teamed up to write the delightfully titled Is Sex Necessary? Or, Why You Feel the Way You Do a book of spoof essays making fun of popular books on Freudian sexual theories at the time. The Roman Hat Mystery the first of the long running Ellery Queen mysteries was published, Queen would keep publishing mysteries into the 1970s (and Ellery Queen was a pen name for two people). Richard Hughes' A High Wind in Jamaica and Oliver La Farge's Laughing Boy also came out in 1929 and are in the public domain now. There's much else but those are the highlights sorry if I missed your favorite 1929 novel.
Movies
Alfred Hitchcock and Cecil B. DeMille's first movies with sound, Blackmail and Dynamite respectively, came out in 1929. Marx Brothers' first feature film The Cocoanuts joins the public domain. Other comedy land marks are Harold Lloyd's first sound film, Welcome Danger and Buster Keaton's last silent film, Spite Marriage (which Keaton also directed). John Ford's first sound film, The Black Watch, which also is 21 year old John Wayne's first appearance in a film, as an uncredited extra, he worked in the art department. Hallelujah the first studio film to have an all black cast came out that year. Also worth noting is The Hollywood Revue of 1929 a singing and dancing review, one of the earliest and the movie that popularized the song Singin’ in the Rain, maybe the first time a movie made a song a hit.
Musical compositions
musical compositions, ie the lyrics and musical notations you might see on sheet music are governed by the 1976 Copyright Act, and music written in 1929 is public domain. Music recordings are governed by a whole different law (we'll get there). Songs written in 1929 include Singin’ in the Rain by Arthur Freed & Nacio Herb Brown, Ain’t Misbehavin’ and Black and Blue by the legendary Fats Waller, What Is This Thing Called Love? by Cole Porter, Tiptoe Through the Tulips by Alfred Dubin, You Were Meant for Me by Arthur Freed & Nacio Herb Brown, and also Happy Days Are Here Again by Jack Yellen which would become FDR's campaign theme song in 1932.
Art!
a number of pieces by Salvador Dalí including:
Illumined Pleasures
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The Accommodations of Desire
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The Great Masturbator
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are entering the public domain as is René Magritte’s The Treachery of Images.
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Art is hard because while movies and books are clearly "published" and put on sale, what counts as "published" for a piece of art? the law is not totally sure.
Musical Recordings
as I promised, we got here. Till 2017 there were no federal laws governing the copyright of music recordings before the 1970s, it was governed by a confusing patchwork of state laws and it was not totally clear what was or was not free and clear even from the very earliest recordings ever. Now the term of a music recording's copyright is set at 100 years (way too long) so music recorded in 1924 is now public domain such as. Nobody Knows the Trouble I’ve Seen by Marian Anderson, Everybody Loves My Baby (But My Baby Don’t Love Nobody But Me) by Louis Armstrong, California Here I Come by Al Jolson, Rhapsody in Blue by George Gershwin, Shreveport Stomp by Jelly Roll Morton, Mama’s Gone, Good Bye by Ray Miller, and It Had To Be You by Marion Harris. Now many recordings a lot less famous can finally be preserved and digitized to save them for the next 100 years. Many abandoned works are literally rotting away since without the copyright holder's permission digitizing a work isn't legal.
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hoseoksluna · 9 days ago
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LITTLE JUICE | JJK
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pairing: boyfriend!jungkook x wine!oc
genre: smut, pwp
rating: 18+
summary: when you get insecure about being constantly needy for your boyfriend, jungkook shows you that it's okay.
word count: 6.4k
warnings: the plot is TEENY TINYYYY in this one, pure filth, mirror sex, dd/lg, little space, new roles for the wine universe omg, jungkook is a caretaker, pet names, degradation kink, praise kink, dry humping, they're so in love it's sickening, oral sex (f. & m. receiving), fingering, squirting, daddy issues, heavy dom/sub dynamics, handjob, penetrative sex without condom, cowgirl, plushies used in a sexual situation.
luna's note: i'm so sorry i couldn't get this out for you on xmas day since i was so sick, but let this be a gift for the new year! i missed writing smut sooooo much, and i can't wait to get back to it starting january. this was so fun omg. i missed wine sm. my daddy issues be daddy issuing so this has something new in it, i'm super excited abt it!! i hope you like this and that you enjoy reading. make sure to let me know what you think in my ask box!! mommy luna is baaaaackkkkkkk. HAPPY NEW YEARRRRR. <3 (one day early but i felt like saying it idc) BIG MWAH.
luna's necessary side note: i missed u all so damn much wtf. OH, AND HAPPY BDAY TAEHYUNGGGGGG.
𓂃 ౨ৎ
taglist | join here: @jjk7k, @tkslovechild, @euphoricmyth, @cinmmongirl, @ririkookiemonster, 
@perfectiondazesworld, @https-mei, @bangtansonyeondanue, @jungkoock, @cinmmongirl, 
@hoseokkie-caeks, @kam9404, @fr0ggieth1nk, @parkinglot-nights, @sadgirlroo
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The mirrors, lining the walls, are nearly all fogged up once you take a step inside the vast rehearsal room. A certain mellow, yet familiar song led you towards the right door—one that made your ears perk up in curiosity because it reminded you of something you’d heard a long time ago, but you couldn’t put your finger on it. Not until you rearranged your bobas into the crook of your elbow and slid open the door. 
The stuffiness of the room only added to the sensual aura of the song, and your legs nearly gave out on you. 
No BS by Chris Brown.
The song that started it all.
Jungkook, clothed in black from head to toe, seems to be locked in his own world as he moves his body in the center of the room, his chest and feet hitting each beat without a singular mistake or a misstep. And when the chorus of the song flows in, his whole figure follows suit. It rolls into the rhythm like the slowest, most passionate wave of the sea that splits in the middle and begins to course down your sternum. Your cheeks darken with a feverish tint. You feel every inch of his movements inside you as if he were there, and when Jungkook spins and sinks to his knees, propping only one Nike-shod foot on the floor, and he hip-thrusts before he continues those rippling motions to the last beats, the muscles of your thighs quiver on reflex and your dampened private parts flutter.
You did not expect to see that when you texted Jungkook you were going to visit him just because you finished work early and you could get boba before your favorite shop closed. You feel as though you just got blessed twice. 
TGIF, indeed. Never in your life had you ever thought you’d celebrate the work week ending like you are right now—with two bobas in your arm, cooling your heated skin, and with your eyes witnessing erotically angelic artistry in a humid room. And with your sensitive parts outright dripping, too, because the song ends, enveloping the room in a silence that welcomes in Jungkook’s heavy breathing as he slumps back onto his back, his chest lifting and falling in the air. 
You feel fuzzily faint. He made you wet in record time and he hasn’t even touched you. Nor has he looked at you. 
Instinctively, your hand grasps your mango boba and you press it against the side of your face. Smile to yourself as a lightbulb flicks to life in your mind. 
Leaving behind your purse, you take both of the delightful treats and walk over to him. His eyes are closed as he’s absolutely unaware of your presence, your steps soft and sly. His round, sweat-splotched nose puffs out hard breaths that move through you and you coo to yourself silently before you place both of your feet on either side of him. You squat down, careful not to let your bum touch his lap, and you get his boba ready, placing your own on the ground. And with the loudest roar you can muster, you press the drink to his glistening cheek. 
He yelps. His fear-filled eyes fly open, his hands quick to catch you as you tumble down on him in reaction, your lungs submerging the room in your obscenely loud giggles. Tears of laughter cloud your vision, preventing you from seeing the horror twisting his face, but the little you saw was enough to douse your body in extraordinary elation. The tapioca inside the long cup swirls as it swims ferociously in the thick, violet liquid, mimicking the roundness and the blackness of his pupils with utmost perfection. 
You swipe a finger under your eye, speckles of your glitter smearing its pad. You lean down, your laughter subdued as it slowly fades out, and you can see the horror smoothing out and transforming, seamlessly, into a relieved adoration that taps against your heart. You kiss him with the boba now cooling your cheek as well. Leave behind a hard peck on his perspiration-coated mouth that makes him softly hum into this physical exchange of love, and just before you draw away, he breathes out against you with his nose. And that doesn’t just tap on your heart, it knocks on it most warmly. 
You love him so much. Too much. So much that the simplest of his body and human reactions make you feel things. Things that normal girls don’t normally feel. 
Good thing you’re not a normal girl. 
You’re a messed up girl. And you’re a girl in love. Have been for the past year. 
“You scared the shit out of me.” 
Your mouth widens into a pleased grin, and the light bulb that shone in a bright yellow melts into a warm, dusky pink tinge that floods your spine—only because he squeezes the dip of your waist that you’ve been working hard at carving out. A new thing you’ve implemented into your daily routine after you’ve gotten a new job that doesn’t allow you to fuck him all day long like you used to. The sex has gotten even better with time as the wine of his love ripened and matured. To such an extent that you found yourself craving it more than you had in those times when you were just seeing him for sex. Two rounds aren’t enough for you—and you remember well that after two rounds you were usually too exhausted to even keep your eyes open. Now, because you have matured too, your vessel for his love and his liquid stars has grown, needing more to feel satisfied to the fullest. The new job kept you away from him, the long hours teased you. So much that your bathroom breaks were too frequent and obvious and you spent them locked in a bathroom stall with one hand in your panties and your other holding your phone to your ear while Jungkook guided you, his hand, too, in his pants, locked in the same place on the other side of the line, whispering encouraging, lewd instructions that sent you shaking over the edge in mere minutes. 
Instructions that got him in trouble at his workplace, hence why he had to come up with a solution. Because your thirst was never quenched in minutes. His voice was too pretty, and too soft. 
Gym five times a week for you, dance lessons for him, physical distance for the both of you. A perfect solution for a perfect problem. All that sexual frustration was released during those exercises filled with delicious pain and you went to work the next day free of that carnal lust swishing in your veins. You focused on your work, and you didn’t have to take long bathroom breaks. You didn’t even need a spare pair of panties in your purse anymore.
It worked—and it’s completely crazy to you that all it took for you to break your public purity streak was seeing him dance like that. 
You sit up and with your swift movement, the squelching sound of your cunt rubbing up against your juices sounds out across the room. Your cheeks heat up with a different shade of red as embarrassment runs down your spine, especially as Jungkook’s brows twitch upwards and his eyes widen, his large hands lowering down a little, following the curve of your figure that leads to his favorite part of you. 
Your hips. 
A blush scatters upon his cheeks, too. He heard it. 
He calls out your name, sweeping his tongue across his abruptly dry and chapped bottom lip. Your name, not princess, not baby. Your government name without any embellishment of adoration. 
You’re in trouble. 
Your embarrassment pinches you at the two dimples on the small of your back. “Y-yeah?” 
Jungkook opens his mouth, but he pauses for a moment. As if he could sense where the emotion touched you, his long and warm fingers find its icy traces that it left behind while still keeping the crooks of his thumb anchored on your hip bones. 
“Did you get wet for me?” 
A shiver cascades down the slender column of your back, a visible one for his eyes to see that coax out his softness for you, evident in the roundness of his bottom lip that he juts out, triggering your unprecedented shyness. What a drastic shift of dynamic in your relationship you perceive this to be. All along, for a year long, the atmosphere of your shared love has been nothing but an environment of safety, where you could unfold your sexuality as naturally and confidently as you wanted to without an ounce of coyness. Introduce an unyielding desire and a well-meaning solution for it into the equation and watch the change bloom. 
For some reason, you’re reminded of his past, now distant, liking of a certain degradation kink that once grew like vines across your intimate relations with him. The memories travel along your veins—the vulgar pet names, the calling out, the rough handling—and crest at your core, moistening the center of your panties even more as your walls pull in. And the way Jungkook takes that bottom lip between his teeth divulges to you quite clearly that he feels it. 
Which is a bad thing because you can’t lie about it. 
But… you can’t divert his attention from it. 
You slosh his drink in your hand. “I got you your favorite,” you chirp, the boba twirling beneath your hand while his identical pupils remain unmoving, unblinking, fixed on you. You manage a smile, but its staticness crumbles as soon as you realize that Jungkook isn’t really influenced by your change of topic. “Taro boba. I got a milk one, too. Mango. You wan—”
His hands descend down to your thighs, squeezing, halting the tide of your words, the progression of your trick. His fingers slip beneath the hem of your skirt and before you know it, he lifts you just a little bit to maneuver you and make you sit on the shaft of his semi. A low gasp gushes out of your throat as well as a leak of your dew not only onto the fabric of your underwear but onto the material that now clings to his manhood. 
He twitches, hardening beneath your pussy, and gooseflesh pricks your skin. 
“Mango? You always get Taro with me.” 
The glitter from your eye make-up that you smeared across his cheek during your kiss twinkles underneath the dimmed light and he doesn’t guide your hips to move against him. No, he rolls his own—ever so slowly, ever so discreetly. His hands merely hold you down, but nothing about it is forceful. Subdued pleasure springs up your sternum, pooling in your head, making you woozy as quickly as if he were pouring booze down your throat. And when he heightens the pressure enough that he twitches again, you recognize he’s doing the same move that is a part of the choreo he was practicing. 
Your heart hammers against your chest. Your nipples pebble against your cotton top, and Jungkook’s eyes fly to them, catching and taking in their aroused state, perhaps even coaxing it out of them. 
A sigh leaves his mouth. He fists the hem of your skirt, dipping his head into the current of the pleasure he’s giving both of you, and so do you. 
You just can’t help it; you can’t fight it. When your toe touches the surface of the wine of your shared love, nothing can keep you from taking a dip. And the same applies to Jungkook, too. In this case, he’s dripping in red, having slipped entirely into the current, one arm out of the water, fingers wrapped around your ankle, pulling you into the water. 
And something about his desire lessens your strange coyness. His lack of solution offering brings down the stigma, setting you free. And you missed him. You missed him terribly. Haven’t felt his dick in five fucking days. 
You place your hands on top of his. 
A small fire begins to burn within the snug blackness of his eyes. All of a sudden, the noises he stifled come out in soft, almost inaudible growls that cause your clit to throb and your nails to dig half-moons into the skin of his hands. A green light from you for him to enjoy this—and he does. Jungkook throws his head back, his pretty chin pointing to the ceiling, and his big chest heaves. 
It is only at this moment that his eyes leave yours just to bask in this forbidden pleasure. 
Anyone could walk in—the doors aren’t locked, nor are they shut at all. Anyone could think the practice room is available for personal use, without a single soul present. And anyone could see you riding the horsey because the sight of him lost in the vivacity of it all forces you most carnally to give him more. 
You hump him. 
“My friend got it the other day and she said it was delicious,” you breathe out, speaking of your unordinary choice of boba. The movements of your hips are small, minuscule, but hard enough that his knuckles get painted with a shade of ivory that sprinkle your chest with little shocks of joy and pride. A thick vein bulges on the side of his throat as Jungkook tries his best not to let out the entirety of his noises that his body is brimming with—and for that very reason, you grab his hands and place them very brattily on your perked, full breasts. “I wanted to try it and see for myself.” 
This feels good. This feels like the time before you got older and greedy. And the feeling is validated when Jungkook whisks his eyes back at you and grapples your tits, squeezing them so hard that it’s you who bites their bottom lip until you nearly draw blood, your body set on fire with a blue desire that kisses his big hands with such roughness that he whimpers. 
But the moment is ruined all too soon. 
A myriad of high-pitched voices is carried through the thick air, accompanied by giggles. You gasp, looking behind you, and before you know it, you’re up on your feet and Jungkook’s unopened boba is knocked to the side, now rolling sideways towards the mirror. 
You go to fetch it, but a strong hand on your arm prevents you from doing so. You spring back to your place in front of him and you glance up at him in confusion just to see him frowning down at you. 
Sweat drips down his temple. The tips of his brows almost meet in the middle, but swim away and relax at the sight of your puzzlement. The voices grow louder, your breath hitches in your throat and Jungkook’s hand lifts and pets down the back of your head, awakening the butterflies in your tummy as if he’s done it for the first time in your life. 
A yearning to kiss him consumes you. 
“Stay here,” Jungkook murmurs, keeping his hand wrapped around the back of your neck. “If they see us like this, they’ll walk away.” 
You nod, understanding if you were to do as you wished, the girls would’ve taken it as a sign to enter the room and perhaps mingle. But if they see you stuck in an intimate moment like this, they quietly and quickly leave without any unnecessary fuss. 
Smart man. 
“I’m also so fucking hard that I can’t even hide it,” he continues, lowering his tone even more. It penetrates you, making your clit thrum, and as your grin blossoms, so does a romantic shade of blush across your cheeks. You envelop your arms around his torso, propping your chin on his chest, radiate your love up to him, and Jungkook smiles down at you. “As per usual.” 
He kisses your forehead, lingering there for a beat longer before he lifts his head and focuses his gaze at the situation at the door. You don’t care much because you dwell on the hot and cold sensation he left in his wake from the warmth of his mouth and the iciness of his lip ring—something you’ll never get used to and something that will always ruin your panties. 
“They’re gone.” 
And so is he. Off to shut the door and lock it, peeking through the little rectangular window to check if anyone is around. Once the coast is clear, you sense him behind you as you bend to pick up his knocked off boba and you stumble upon his gaze in the mirror as soon as you straighten your spine. 
A hungry look is wrung into his features. 
The corners of his eyes droop in arousal, narrowed as they are. His pupils are blacker than the tapioca in your hands. His teeth nibble on his bottom lip impatiently and you flutter all over, taking in his state and his large stature towering above you. You could melt into him and never be found again, hidden in the crevices of his body that you still believe are there for you. Hidden forever, safe and sound. 
He’s delicious through and through—and it’s been five days since you last had a taste of him. 
Five torturous days. 
“You must be thirsty after all that dancing,” you say, breathless and thirsty yourself. His chest heaves, colliding into your back, and all those soft crevices of him touching you brings you back into that ravenous, greedy state you can’t get out of so easily. Dangerous, he is. Utterly, utterly dangerous. Erasing your clean streak like that. “Let me open it for you.” 
You go to turn around and fetch his straw from your purse, but he doesn’t let you. He encages you where you are by a mere placement of his hand on your hip, fingers back to gripping the fabric of your skirt. He can rip it off if he likes—he can buy you a new one and make your heart elated anytime. 
The idea hardens your nipples, making a show for him all over again. 
He pushes you flush against him, earning a sultry gasp from you. The fingers that gripped your skirt elongate across your mound while the other graze your chin, elevating it a little, ensuring a strong eye contact. 
You flutter. Can’t take it anymore. He has to take you home and fuck the shit out of you before you— 
“I am thirsty,” he purrs, his lips borderline touching yours. “But for something other than bubble tea. Care to guess what it is?” 
Your breath lodges in your throat. You know well what he means, but out of habit and out of personal pleasure you pretend to be dumb. You want to hear him say it—you want him to be as detailed as he was during those naughty afternoon phone calls that got him in trouble with his boss, who told him off for having long work breaks. You want him, his filthy mouth and even filthier, condescending manners. 
You want the old times—and for the sake of your desire, you remain silent. Twist your brows in feigned confusion. Widen your eyes a little. Puff out your cheeks. 
Your adorableness makes him twitch against your hip. Jungkook sucks in a breath. Takes the hand that caressed your chin and glides it down your neck, your chest, your stomach that flexes under his touch until he winds up at the waistband of your skirt. There he stops and he tilts his head to the side, sweeping his tongue along the pillow of his bottom lip. 
“What I want,” he starts, his breathing quickening. “Is the little juice that is in here.” He skims the pads of his fingers down your mound, beneath the hem of your skirt and along the sopping surface of your clothed feminine flesh. You mewl, your hips instinctively riding his fingers, following the sailing, back and forth motion. Your adorableness deepens with the influence of the sudden pleasure by the way it scrunches up your features and Jungkook whimpers again, stopping his motions when he feels you timidly soak his fingers. “I want it so bad that I can’t go one more minute without it.” 
You glance down more to see how big of a mess you’re making on his hand, but as attuned as he is to his role, brought about by his arousal, Jungkook takes your breath away with his following actions. 
He moves you closer to the mirror. Bunches up your skirt even higher so you have a perfect view of your panties, which have a large wet spot in the middle. Little rivulets of your juices flow out of their confines and down your inner thighs, proceeding to make a puddle on the hardwood floors beneath your feet. Jungkook’s fingers are shiny in the light, coated in your lustfulness, and he drifts them up and down that stain—over your swollen clit and sensitive lips. 
“See? Here. This little wet princess part of you is what I crave.”
And just like that, owing to his words, you flourish into the little girl you haven’t been safely dwelling in for months, sliding into that role as easily, tenderly and meekly as if you were slipping your feet into your fluffy slippers. You regress, beautifully, making sweet little noises into his neck as you go to hide in there, poking his drink into his hand, silently telling him to take it while you rub your sticky thighs together, eager to get the uncomfortable throbbing feeling away. And he does, solid in his own caretaker role, sinking down onto his knees, placing the drink on the floor against the mirror. But he remains there, looking up at you, eyes big and round, yet still steady, sure, mature and irrevocably dependable. And you sense those eyes to be telling you to take your panties off and give the Daddy what he craves. 
You hook your thumbs under the waistband of your underwear and drag it down past the middle of your thighs, letting him handle the rest, but you catch his eyes watering ever so gently—and the discovery causes your heart to skip a beat. He’s taken in the role you’ve slipped into, having watched it happen in real time in all its glory, and perhaps he’s nostalgic, or perhaps he’s just euphoric, but he takes the time to bask in it all. 
And he kisses the cotton fabric of your panties first before he kisses the soft flesh of your thigh. Drags it down. Lets it pool in his hands at your ankles. Peeks up at you. 
“The way you willingly give yourself over to me never fails to mesmerize me,” he purrs, pressing another kiss to your thigh without taking his eyes off of you. Your stomach jumps, energy-charged butterflies scurrying to the front of your stomach in longing to kiss him, too. “You’ve been feeling bad about being needy for me. Worked hard for weeks to be a good girl, but what you don’t know, princess, is that you were a good girl even when you called me up at work asking for me,” he continues, lips brushing against your skin with every pronounced vowel. He edges around your knee and begins to pepper gentle, wet kisses there. Your mouth falls open—and you discover this place is a spot of more sensitivity than your neck. You double over, grabbing a tight hold of his tousled, yet soft hair, and Jungkook moans against you. “And you’re a good girl right now for giving yourself over to me, even when you’re so careful about being horny for me in public.” 
Your body forces out the same kind of noises, so tender and pained, your heart rapidly kicking against your ribcage. Your arousal is heightened by his words carrying such devastating praise, even when the most inert core of you aches for such different debauchery—the very opposite of what he’s giving you. 
You leak for him, nonetheless. 
Unable to take it anymore, Jungkook cradles your ankles and carefully rids you of your ruined panties, half-stuffing them into the front pocket of his jeans. A tiny bit of the pink fabric sticks out of it and the sight intoxicates you, pulling you deeper into your little space. Even more so when he finishes his praise because he wasn’t done yet. Not quite. 
“And to see you be little for me so prettily again after such a long time,” he husks, spreading your legs far apart enough to see that gleaming rivulet make its way down the inner of your thigh. “That makes me the happiest man in the world, princess. I missed you. God, I missed you.” 
Jungkook leans in and, with his tongue flat against your inner thigh, he collects the little juice you leak for him. He moans at the taste, but the sound is broken by a cry marked by yearning for more. He doesn’t stop there—he delves immediately, without sparing a second, into your lap with such a verve that your back crashes against the still fogged up mirror. His mouth seizes your clit, making kissing sounds as he laps and sucks at it with a hunger that could never be replicated in the arts. You grip his hair tighter for support, almost sliding down the mirror while struggling to contain your noises, the pleasure permeating every inch of your body that is ultimately submitted to him. The pressure of the delight he’s giving you deepens when he places one of your thighs on his shoulder, helping you take it while he continues to moan into your pussy and eat her like she deserves. 
But you can’t take it. Not at all. Not when he begins to flick his tongue on your clit in a way that he does. 
Your foot slips, but Jungkook is in control. He makes sure you land on your bum safely and painlessly, not once ripping his mouth off your cunt. His eyes continue to be steady, fixed on you, narrowed into such thin, alluring slits that it hastens your sweet release. You hiccup as you take little breaths, overwhelmed by it all. Your cheeks burn, and the fire spreads down your limbs, leaping over to your boyfriend at work, who glows with a rosy tint. Jungkook pulls away a little bit, dripping in arousal and perspiration, and he allows you to see his technique in all its glory. 
The tip of his tongue stimulates your engorged clit with rapid, hard flicks. 
Your orgasm inches closer and closer. Jungkook pushes your legs all the way back until you’re a squished mochi that he can’t get enough of, and when he puts a bigger pressure on your little bud, it is your absolute undoing. 
Closer and closer, the orgasm takes over you completely. From the top of your head to your little toes that flex in your sneakers, you begin to shake uncontrollably as the highest level of the delight bursts upon your body. Jungkook’s noises grow in volume simultaneously, enraptured as he is by the view of his created paradise unfolding over you—and he never stops looking at you. 
Not even as you come down from your high. 
Not even as he, with your little juice dripping down his chin, turns you around and stacks one of your feet on the mirror while he keeps the other leg back with his hand. His limbs surround you, and as you blink through the blinding fog of your orgasm, you realize that you accidentally managed to match your shoes with his. High Nike dunks, black. The ones he got for you as well when he bought a pair for himself. 
Your hole clenches in the mirror. A stream of your little juice makes a larger puddle on the floor beneath you. 
“Look at you dripping for me, fuck.” 
Hooking your leg over his right limb, he strums your entire feminine flesh with the four of his fingers, the squelching and squeaking sounds of your pussy pulling a tortured groan out of him as if he hadn’t gotten a taste of you a mere minute ago. His other hand sneaks to your tits to feel them up, stopping at your pebbled nipple, which he fondles as he breathes against you, inhaling your scent. Your hips buckle, your drenched seashell sensitive from his feast, and Jungkook lets out a pleased chuckle. 
“My pretty little pussy. Always so sensitive from all my love, huh?” 
You nod, meeting his gaze in the mirror, and Jungkook grins before he places a fat, rewarding kiss to your cheek, the two of his fingers, middle and ring, one of them adorned with that white Miffy plastic ring, starting a series of circles on your clit. 
Your hips buckle again, the pleasure soft yet dizzying, overwhelming your senses. Jungkook tightens his grip around you, squeezing your breast. 
“Whose pussy is this, princess?” 
In the middle of it all, a light bulb flicks to life once again in your woozy mind. And a pleased smile, just like his, begins to grow on your mouth. But Jungkook is impatient and you’re not responding fast enough for his taste, so he lifts his soaked fingers and uses them to grip your mouth. 
There it is. 
“I asked you a question. Whose pussy is this?” 
You’d bite your lip if he weren’t squishing your cheeks together, but your satisfied smile reaches your eyes, crinkling them. That causes him to relax his hold and give you a chance to give him the answer he seeks. 
Little does he know you’re about to manipulate him into giving you the sin that you desire. 
“This slutty little pussy is yours. Yours and no one else’s, Dada.” 
His brows twitch and light unrolls across his face, softening his features in a way you’ve never seen before. He curses, momentarily rolls his eyes back, and he plunges his wet fingers into his mouth before he seizes your mouth in a compulsive kiss that thoroughly shuts off your brain. You taste yourself on his tongue, and you comprehend he licked off his fingers and didn’t swallow only so you could get the treat he had himself—because he busies his fingers by burying them inside your fleshy heat. 
And he fucks you hard and doesn’t stop even when you begin to make intense little noises into his mouth. 
You struggle to kiss him back when he curls his fingers and pistons into you with rapid jerks from this angle. His other hand tugs your top upwards, finds its way into the cups of your bra just so he could pinch and rub your nipple in the way that you like. And when his tongue flicks against yours and his mouth purses softly against yours before he deepens the kiss, your orgasm hits you so unexpectedly that you’re as surprised as him once you come apart all over not just his hand, but the mirror, too. 
You splatter it with your little juice and even then, Jungkook doesn’t stop. Growling with heavy breaths, he strums your clit as fast as he can until there’s nothing left you can give to him. 
You slump against him, high on the complexity of yours and his aphrodisiac love. Specks of your glitter—your small shooting stars gravitate down to your flushed cheeks, and then his fingers are in your mouth, traveling far down and deep until you grace him with the sound he likes. You gag around them and he nods, pleased, smirking. 
“Good girl. Your slutty little juice tastes good, doesn’t it, baby?” he asks, and your stomach springs, your drunken feelings intensified by the fact you finally got what you yearned for. “Your mouth makes me fucking crazy. Dada, slutty pussy. I’m gonna lose my mind.” 
You mewl, your eyes heavy, but you want more—you want his cock, and he can feel it, he knows it. He knows it when he pulls out his fingers and kisses you as if the world was meant to end in the next minute. He knows it because he withdraws and he tells you. 
“Dada’s gonna fuck that slutty little pussy of his, hm?” Jungkook murmurs, and then his zipper is down, and just like the old times—he doesn’t rid himself of his clothes and gives you a brand new world with his strokes just the way he is. 
Fully clothed, with his hard drooling cock poking out of his unzipped jeans. 
He presses you against your wet juices on the mirror, spitting on his hand and lubricating the tip of his manhood. He enters you and you gasp, fogging up the mirror with your breath, and the hand that holds your head steady against the mirror buries into your hair while the other wraps around your hip. He sheathes himself inside you slowly whilst your eyes flutter shut at the feeling of finally being stretched out by him and once he bottoms out, it’s over. 
Your life is over.
“Dada’s pussy always so tight.” 
He pounds into you religiously—creating a new order for this brand new world. Hard, merciless strokes that scramble your brain and turn it into a mush. Your ass ripples with each collision and his noises melt into yours, a hymn for the utopia he’s fucking you into. And then he’s lifting you from the mirror and keeping you flush to himself, staring at you in the reflection while your tits spill out from your bra, bouncing, and Jungkook can’t get enough. Both of his hands drag down your straps, freeing your breasts, and he’s groping them, pinching your nipples without ever stopping the entrancing snapping of his hips. 
“Pretty princess getting fucked. Look at you. So pretty and all mine.” 
And then his Miffy-adorned finger is back on your clit, rubbing hard circles, and your personal world is finished—because your pleasure is his ultimate undoing. 
The smacking of skin quietens and his hips begin to roll—a languid, staccato version of his choreo that got you all needy and wet but an hour ago. Jungkook whimpers into your ear how much he loves you, over and over again, as he stuffs you full of his cum, and he doesn’t stop rubbing your swollen little clit until you come all over his twitching cock. 
And he doesn’t pull away. 
He holds you like this, panting into your neck, his grip still tight, still evoking a sense of safety you won’t find anywhere else. Your drowsy eyelids flit, consider yourself well-spent, and the thought begins to sing a celebratory song in your chest—because all that hard work paid off. 
You’re no longer greedy; you’re gratified after the first round. 
Jungkook kisses the nape of your neck. “We should go before Bunny and Vinny start wondering where we are.” 
The song wraps around your heart, which dissolves at his words. Jungkook pulls himself out of you, but you swivel around and throw your arms around him, catching him off guard. His still erect and wet length brushes against your thigh—and the contact makes you quiver in his arms.
“I feel good,” you explain into his ear. “I don’t need more.” 
Jungkook chuckles. Wants to look at your face and he smooths your hair back, grinning at you. “I’m proud of you, princess, but look,” he says, glancing down. You follow his gaze down and perceive he’s talking about his private parts. “I’m still hard.” 
His cock twitches at his words and twitches once more at the sound of your giggles—happy, happy giggles because the stigma behind your neediness withers and completely disappears, never to be found again, only because Jungkook isn’t embarrassed or afraid to show you he needs more. Your chest becomes light, light enough that you think you grew a pair of wings to fly around the room with.
“Gym, Gguk. You have to hit the gym more often,” you joke, knowing his work out schedule transcends beyond the five days you spend at the place. 
The corner of his mouth curls as mischief twinkles in his eyes, divulging to you that he likes the way you challenge him. 
“Oh yeah?” he questions, lifting his arm, pulling back the oversized sleeve of his T-shirt to flex his biceps. Your cheeks heat up at the strong mountains that appear and your hand can’t help but to knead it. “These aren’t big enough for you, huh?” 
You scoff and shush him at the same time, leaning over to plant a singular kiss to his muscles. Jungkook uses the opportunity to hide you in his embrace and you both sputter into laughs and giggles. He pecks your hair, but something interrupts your sweet moment. 
“Look at the mess you made,” he says, pointing at the mirror, and you gasp when you turn around. 
An imprint of the side of your face is left behind on the reflection. Foundation, mascara and glitter amidst the little pearls and rivulets of your juices. You worry what you look like now if your make-up is smeared to this extent, but it soon is washed away from your mind when Jungkook crawls forward and makes a heart on the wetness of your slick. 
He takes a picture of it and then he cleans it off with his gym towel. The floor, too. 
At home, you fuck him hard for it. 
With his Taro boba in his arm, Vinny on his chest and Bunny in the crook of his other arm, you ride him until your thighs burn and he resembles the prettiest rose you’ve ever laid your eyes on. Having come more than enough on his cock, you jerk him off while you flick your tongue on his tip, and he moans, flushes and convulses until he spills all over your hand and his stomach. Ropes of him cum reach the plushies, too, as he can’t stop coming and, growing feignedly jealous, you swallow him, longing for him to drip down your throat. 
He comes so much that your belly is full and he’s as gratified as you were in the practice room. 
And after a quick shower, you both drift off to your brand new world unexpectedly, the events of the day having exhausted you enough that you fall asleep within the next heartbeat. Vinny and Bunny tumble on in the washing machine while you and Jungkook dance in the new paradise, having stepped into the role of parents having a date without the kids. No stress, no stigma—just the freedom of being loved right. 
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sunhee27 · 3 months ago
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☆ Thing Enhypen do at night/ when they are sleeping.
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• 엔하이픈 ୨୧ f ! r・fluff established relationship ・kisses, petnames (^-^) pls reblog if you like it and requests are welcome.
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(Sorry some of the letters are big, I can’t change it) :(
• 𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆 (이희승)
-Pouts
The man pouts! Yes he does, especially when sleeping. It’s honestly the cutest thing ever. Of course he denies it, and that makes it even more cute in a way. “I don’t pout!” He whines into your ear after he is begging for a kiss and you tell him that you will only give him a kiss if he admits that he pouts in his sleep. He hugs you and cuddles you while whining. He whines again at you. “Kiss me!!!! >:(“ He ‘cries’ into you ear to which you just give in. You can’t help but give him a little peck on his pouty lips when he is snuggled against you.
-Switching spots
Do you know what I mean here? probably not. But like once you are asleep, you will turn to the other side, which Heeseung doesn’t like because he likes you facing him to hug you against his chest. Or sometimes he likes back hugging you. So when you turn around, he IS gonna scoop you up and put you on his side of the bed, and he will switch to being on your side of the bed, so that he can hug you in his desired position.
(Rest of the members under the cut)
• 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐉𝐀𝐘 (박종성)
-Stealing blankets
It’s tiring and it annoys you, but you kinda live for it when he steals your blanket. He doesn’t even seem to notice himself. It’s just a habit he picked up. If he steals yours, you steal his! And that goes on and on. But you don’t complain…only a little. “Stop stealing my blanket at night.” You say. “Man, but yours is always warmer.” He pouts. “Get over it. You can just hug me if it is.” You scoff. “I would…IF I COULD CONTROL MYSELF WHEN I AM SLEEPING.” He argues back pulling you by the waist. “Fine. It doesn’t bother me more than that. But only because I love you so much.” You give up.
-Strokes your hair
When he notices that you have fallen asleep, he will just stroke your hair as a reflex almost 😅 And sometimes you will stir awake, to which he apologises faster than light itself. But honestly you only woke up because it felt nice to have your hair stroked.
• 𝐒𝐈𝐌 𝐉𝐀𝐊𝐄 (심재윤)
-Talks
Who would’ve thought, jakey jakey talks in his sleep. He mumbles and talks, rambling about his day, about you 🥺 You voice recorded him saying that you were his princess. And it may have boosted his boyfriend ego. “Did I say that?” He laughs at it. ��Clearly yeah.” You giggle back, he connects your foreheads. “Do you know what that means?” He hovers over you in the bed. ”No” you giggle again. “That I am obsessed with you.” He smiles.
-Does tasks
Broski think you go to bed too early, even if he is the first of all members to go to sleep. So he will just cuddle up with you until you fall asleep, and then… get ready for bed. Doing tasks, all sort of tasks. And you would wake up slightly, still half in dream land. ‘it’s just an illusion’ he would say when he notices that he woke you up. Because he doesn’t want to make you feel bad for making him cuddle with you until you fall asleep, even if he loves doing it.
• 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐍 (박성훈)
-Lightly snoring
Idols don’t snore… Bullshit! At least this man does. It’s cute when he makes small noises and groans at night. And he knows that he does it. And only just nervously laugh when the topic is brought up. His members tease him with it too. “I know I snore, but let’s just act like I don’t!!!” He says in an embarrassed tone. “But it’s cute.” You giggle. “No…” he pouts. But you will truly never stop teasing him about it.
-Swings leg around you
He sleeps late, looking at his phone. And out of nowhere he will probably swing a leg or two around you. Like they are heavy man! But you don’t mind it when he then pulls you closer with his legs :D Cute man indeed
• 𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐎𝐎 (김선우)
-expressions
Believe me when I say. I think he dreams a lot. And his face shows it all, happy, sulky, mad, frustrated, scared. And as soon as you notice he is having a nightmare and breath is uneven, you will wake him up. And he will squirm before noticing it’s just his sweet girlfriend who is before his eyes. “You scared the shit outta me. But thank for waking me up.” He would say. And he would ask you to hug him for the rest of the night.
-Go to sleep early and wake up in the middle of the night
The title says it all. He would go early think it would be good for his beauty sleep. But he would then wake up in the middle of the night not being able to sleep at all. And would literally not give a shit about YOUR beauty sleep, and he would wake you up to gossip together until you both fall into slumbers again.
• 𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐖𝐎𝐍 (양정원)
-Get cold and crawl under the blankets
It’s so cute to watch the little kitten crawl all the way under the blankets at night. Like he would roll himself into a little ball under the warmth of his blanket and then snuggle up to you. “Bllrr, it’s so colllddddddd.” He shivers. “Do you need an extra blanket.” You laugh sitting up beside him. “If you are the blanket, then yes.” He teases.
-Dry lips
Don’t ask me how he would literally, feel in his sleep, that his lips are chapped. But he would a million times in a night. And of course he would make sure to gloss up your lips too. So that his pretty girl is also satisfied with her lips in the morning.
• 𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐔𝐑𝐀 𝐑𝐈𝐊𝐈 (西村力)
-Moves a lot
He would absolutely destroy you, crush you with his six feet long body. He would roll in his sleep without noticing it and before he knows it you are about to fall of the bed. “Nikiiiiii, you are so heavyyy.” You whine under him. And shit he would wake up and be so embarrassed by it. “Sorryyy.” He would laugh. Definitely forgiven 👍
-Get up and get snacks
He would do something like this. He would wake up hangry. So he would check out the fridge then the pantry and then whatever else there is, before deciding to just toast a piece of bread. And then you would pop up and you would end up sitting in comfortable silence eating bread together.
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saintobio · 7 months ago
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blank canvas: the epilogue.
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pairings. ryōmen sukuna, fem!reader
genre. past lovers, angst, opposites attract
tags/warnings. mentions of toxic relationships, purple hearts-ish themes, maybe some heartache
notes. 2.4k wc. i said it’ll come in a few days, but i had free time so here it issss!
part 1 | part 2 | part 3
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TWO YEARS LATER
Tonight was Yuki and Choso’s going-away party. 
Their decision to migrate to another side of the world was because Yuki had always talked about wanting to live abroad, and so when Choso was offered a once-in-a-lifetime job opportunity in another country, it became the perfect chance for them to make that dream a reality.
So despite your apprehensions, you couldn’t miss the chance to see Yuki one last time and accepted her invitation to the party.
The evening was alive with laughter and chatter as their families and friends gathered to celebrate their bittersweet departure. Among the crowd, you spotted some familiar faces who exchanged greetings with the couple, as well as some strangers you had never seen before.
But one person was conspicuously absent. 
It had been two years since you had seen Sukuna, and the thought of potentially running into him again filled you with a strange mix of anticipation and dread. However, deep down, you knew he wouldn’t be there. There was no chance of him ever showing up because you hadn’t heard from him since that fateful night. The apartment you once shared together now housed a new tenant, and the tattoo shop across the street had transformed into a record store. Neither Yuki, nor Choso (even Yuuji), had mentioned anything about Sukuna since then, possibly avoiding any mentions of him to you out of his request. He had simply disappeared, evaporated from existence, leaving behind nothing but a fading memory.
As you scanned the room with a forlorn smile, your thoughts were interrupted by Yuki’s cheerful voice. “Y/N! So glad you could make it! I thought you weren’t gonna come, too.”
Your first instinct was to hug her tightly. “Of course, not! You know I can’t not see you before you go.”
“Aww.” She embraced you tighter before pulling away with a sad smile. “I’m gonna miss you so much. You’re like a little sister to me.” 
Indeed, and she was the big sister you never had. Things would feel different without her here, but you supported her decisions and would always wish her the best in her future endeavors. So, despite the distance you two would soon have, you gave her a reassuring pat on the back. “We can still keep in touch. And maybe, I’ll pay you a visit there, too.” 
“Honestly, I would love that!” she enthused, “Please do, even if I have to harass Getou and Gojou about it.” 
You chuckled as she mentioned the duo’s name and spent the next few minutes with you chatting for a bit, catching up with your life, talking about your future plans. It was amazing how much can change in two years, and how some things can also stay the same. Like your friendship. And this bond that you would never find with anyone else.
For now, the night was still young, and you knew Yuki still had many more guests to accommodate, so you didn’t want to take all of her time. Eventually she did excuse herself to greet more guests, and you found yourself standing by the kitchen island, absentmindedly stirring your cocktail.
As you stood in the corner of the room, surrounded by the chatter and laughter of the party, you felt a sudden jolt run through your body as loud voices boomed across the room. They were Yuuji and Choso’s exuberant greetings cutting through the air, drawing everyone’s attention, including yours.
“Nii-san!”
“There he goes, Mr. First Lieutenant!” 
Your eyes widened as you saw the figure they were addressing with playful salute—a man in a crisp military uniform, standing tall and confident. It took you a moment to recognize him, but when you did, your heart skipped a beat.
It was Sukuna.
He looked different, transformed almost, his demeanor more composed, his smile softer yet still retaining the undeniable aura of masculinity. He looked a lot more muscular than the last you remembered. His hair, now dyed back to its natural color, was neatly trimmed. You recognized that the uniform he wore was of the Japan Self-Defense Forces, adorned with badges and insignias that spoke of his achievements. The reckless, wild look in his eyes had been replaced by something steadier, more focused.
It wasn’t just the sight of him that made your heart skip a beat—it was how different he looked. 
“That’s so cool!” Yuuji raved about his older brother’s badges, his starry eyes genuinely intrigued at the sight of Sukuna in a uniform. 
Choso, on the other hand, was pulling him in a hug in an emotional jest. “Dammit. You said you couldn’t make it!” 
“Don’t cry now,” Sukuna teased, patting the younger brother’s back. He seemed to be genuinely having fun teasing his brothers. “Had to pull some strings. I was on duty, but do ‘ya think I’d let you go without seeing you?” 
You felt a pang of nostalgia in their interaction, but also recognized the visible difference in the way your ex-boyfriend spoke to others. He was genuinely happy. He was all smiles. He was the healthiest version of himself, both physically and emotionally.
It was clear to you that Sukuna had turned his life around, and it was evident that he was doing well in his field of work. The man you once knew, who had been consumed by his reckless way of life, was now standing tall and respected as an honorable member of the military.
When you said you had never met Sukuna again in your lifetime, that was true. Because the Sukuna you knew was no longer here. It was an entirely different man, changed for the better, just not for you. 
As if sensing your gaze, Sukuna turned and your eyes mirrored each other’s surprise. For a moment, the world around you seemed to fade away, as if you were characters in a movie screen seeing each other for the very first time. It was as though your eyes were the camera, and he was the actor. You could say you were starstruck, your heart thumping so loud that you could hear it vibrate through your ears. 
Two freaking years, and Sukuna still had that effect on you. 
You didn’t know what to do. You found yourself at a loss, the red cup in your hand now shaking from the sudden surge of anxiety. Your mind was a whirlwind of conflicting thoughts, a kaleidoscope of heavy emotions, a tornado of nostalgic bliss, leaving you feeling adrift in a sea of memories. 
You wondered if Sukuna hated having to see you here. And if so, should you leave to spare yourself—or perhaps him—from any potential discomfort?
Caught in this internal struggle, you felt paralyzed, uncertain of what to do next. But then, you saw a flicker of recognition and regret in his eyes. 
Before you could even contemplate your next move, Sukuna was already excusing himself from his brothers. Their knowing looks exchanged in silence spoke volumes, indicating they were aware of where he was headed. The realization then hit you like a wave. Sukuna, your ex-boyfriend of two years, was coming toward you, and you were suddenly faced with a decision between confronting the past or making a quick escape.
“Y/N,” he greeted with a boyish grin, his voice deeper, more controlled. The bad boy persona he used to carry was completely gone. 
“Sukuna,” you replied, struggling to keep your voice steady, a complete opposite from his confidence.
There was a moment of awkward silence before he spoke again. “You look great.”
“Thanks,” you meekly replied, clearing your throat and gesturing to his uniform, “You, too. Military suits you. I never saw that coming.”
He smiled in agreement, seemingly happy about his current appearance. You had never seen this kind of bliss from him before, like he was filled with content and a sense of self-worth. He was proud, and truth be told, you were, too. 
“It’s been a good change. It gave me structure, purpose,” he paused, taking a red cup from the kitchen island nearby, “I finally got something ‘better’ to do with my life, huh?”
You smiled softly, not missing the implication of his last statement. “I’m happy for you. Really.”
“Thank you.”
“Of course.” 
“Mhmm.” 
The minutes that followed were some of the most agonizing of your life, not because of Sukuna, but because of the overwhelming awkwardness that enveloped the two of you. It felt as though you had nothing else to discuss, knowing full well that delving into your shared past was a territory you could never comfortably navigate. However, Sukuna, always the more vocal one in your relationship, had finally broken the silence.
“Do you…” he began, leaving you on edge, anticipating his question, “Do you wanna get some fresh air outside?” 
Right. And with a smile, you nodded. “Sure.” 
— —
You were grateful for the opportunity to escape the stifling atmosphere of the party and find some solace in the cool night air. Both of you were at the front porch, sitting over the pavement talking about anything but your past. 
Sukuna excitedly talked about his time in the military, where you learned that he had enlisted two years ago and joined the army. After enlisting, he quickly excelled in the rigorous training required for the Special Operations Group (SOG). It didn’t surprise you that his physical prowess, sharp intellect, and determination made him a standout candidate.
“I actually completed advanced courses in counter-terrorism, reconnaissance, and combat survival,” he shared, his gaze set on the clear starry night above you. “Oh, and last month, I was deployed on a high-stake mission overseas. We extracted hostages from a conflict zone. Remember the action movies we used to watch? It was exactly like that. It was fun, thrilling.” 
You listened intently, an elbow propped on your leg as you absorbed the enthusiasm in his stories. Pride and joy swelled in your heart as you heard him talk about something he was passionate about, because it was a stark contrast to the old Sukuna who wouldn’t have shown interest in these things. And this time around, you felt like you were infatuated again, but with the new him. 
“I’m really proud of you.” Longingness dripping from your voice. “Very proud. And you’re First Lieutenant, too? Wow.” 
The compliment seemingly made him blush, a sight so rare to see that you haven’t seen it throughout your relationship. “I wanted to become a better man.” 
You felt a squeeze in your heart. You recalled the words he said that night at the parking lot, of him telling you that he had his own insecurities, too. That he knew all along that your uncertainties about him were rooting from his way of life. That he was aware that he couldn’t give you the life you deserved. 
“Y/N.” Your name rolled off his tongue in an affectionate manner. He soon rose from his seat, prompting you to follow suit, before turning to face you. “I forgot to mention.”
You swallowed hard. “Yeah?”
His smile was sweet and genuine. “I’m engaged now.”
Oh.
Of course. 
What did you expect?
His words settled in your heart like a suffocating shroud. Despite the ache in your chest, you managed a polite nod, concealing the storm of emotions swirling inside you. But you couldn’t contain it—the damn tears that pooled in your eyes. Please, not now. You turned away, hoping to shield your reaction from him.
But it was all too late. 
He was already pulling you into an embrace, the familiarity in his warmth only making you weaker inside. “You are and will always be my greatest love,” he whispered into your ear, pressing his lips against your temple, “And also my biggest regret.”
Damn it. You covered your face with your hands, feeling ashamed of the tears streaming down your cheeks. What an absurd twist of fate. You could have gone about your day without encountering him again, yet here you were, shedding tears over the same man who had broken your heart two years ago.
“When I say regret,” he continued, cupping your cheeks and smiling at you lovingly. He ran his thumb across your cheeks, wiping your tears away. “I meant regret of not being that man for you. I didn’t treat you the way you deserved, or respected your boundaries like I thought I did.” Sukuna’s charm had you holding your breath still, too enamored by his beauty under the moonlight. He used to be a man of a few words, and now he didn’t shy away from pouring out his raw emotions. “I’m sorry I was two years too late. I’m sorry I had to let you go and be with someone else. But you and I know that it’s for the best.”
You weren’t crying because you wanted to get back together with him. You weren’t crying because he had promised marriage to someone else. You were crying because it felt like he was the one who slipped through your fingers, the one that got away, the one who could have been your forever if circumstances had aligned differently. It was the regret of a lost possibility, the ache of knowing that in another universe, you and him could have shared a lifetime together, untouched by the mistakes of the past.
He had dreams of making you his wife, dreams of having your children, dreams of growing old with you.
But the old Sukuna was dead, replaced by the new Sukuna who was happy and free from love’s toxicity. You realized it was time to let go. Time to bury the past and instead celebrate the future. 
“Congratulations on the engagement,” you offered your well wishes, pulling away slightly to meet his gaze with your tear-filled eyes. “I hope she doesn’t find you a handful.”
He let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head. “No, no. I have to behave or else I’m a dead man,” he joked. “She's in the army, too.”
“Well, I’m glad you met her, Sukuna. You deserve it,” you said, your voice filled with genuine warmth as you wiped your lachrymose eyes. 
Gratitude and comfort shone in his gaze. “And I’m glad you found your peace, Y/N. You always deserved better.”
You smiled in appreciation of his words as he helped you dust off your pants. Just then, your phone buzzed in your pocket, briefly taking your attention away from the current scene. “Uh, I think I need to go,” you hesitated, glancing back at the house. “But I think Yuki’s pretty busy.”
“It’s fine,” he assured. “Do you want me to call you a cab or?”
“No, it’s okay,” you replied, shooting him a grateful expression. “Satoru’s on his way to pick me up.”
He nodded, smiling. “Cool.” You were surprised when he offered his hand, a gesture to finally close whatever remained between you two. “It was nice seeing you, Y/N.”
You shook his hand and gave him a playful salute. “Likewise, First Lieutenant Ryomen Sukuna.”
As he returned to the party, immediately attacked by his friends, there was no hint of yearning or longing in him, as if the poignant exchange with his ex-girlfriend had never occurred. He was back in the scene in a fluid motion, laughing, catching up with his loved ones, telling stories about his life. No heartbreaks, no painful memories.
While as you stood there, knowing you had shared respect and love for each other, you were happy that there was a sense of closure in seeing Sukuna as the man he had become. You had both grown, both changed, and in that moment, you knew that your story, though painful, had led you two to where you needed to be. 
That your love’s canvas, once blank, now held colors to complete the portrait.
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bloomries · 6 months ago
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it's me or ____!
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includes  : lucifer, mammon, leviathan, satan, asmodeus, beelzebub, and belphegor.
summary  : asking them to choose between you and their favorite thing (lightheartedly).
warnings  : gn! reader. possessive! satan (could read a bit yandere, so be wary of that). name calling (in belphegor's).
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LUCIFER
his classical music records
Your question was very out of nowhere, and Lucifer doubt you meant it seriously, still his heart dropped when you picked up one of his records and fiddled with it. He chuckles tensely, hands flexing by his side. "You already know the answer, why bother asking?"
You send him a glance, noticing his tense behavior. You look down at the record in your hand, deciding to tease him a little further. "Do I?" You pout, "Are you sure you don't love this piece of vinyl more?"
Lucifer wondered if you were the demon in that moment, as you toy with his beloved heart. When you finally cease your teasing, setting down the record where it belonged, he let out a breath of relief.
Then, with quick strides he walks over to where you are and takes you by the shoulders. "I apologize if it wasn't obvious before, but I should hope you know that I love you more." You smile, confirming you knew this, leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek. He pulls back and clears his throat. "But I also do really love my records, so please don't scare me like that again..."
MAMMON
grimm
"I can't choose between the two loves of my life?? How do you expect me to choose?" He asks with a pout. You two had just woken up, not even out of bed, when you asked the demon this question. You weren't expecting this response, although you feel a little foolish to not expect this outcome.
"You're sleeping on the couch tonight." You say, rolling over so your back faces him. He lets out another whine, wrapping his arms around you and burying his face into your neck.
"Don't be upset," his hot breath tickles your neck. "Grimm lets me spoil ya, y'know. Whenever I buy somethin' I know ya like, and bring it home to ya and see that big ol' smile... How can I not like grimm when it makes such good things happens, hmm?" Well, Mammon is surely very charming, you'll give him that. You peek over at him and he's smiling that smile that has your stomach doing flips.
"Fine... No couch..." You pinch his cheek. "But if I ever ask that question again, the answer better be 'you, darling,' got it?"
"L- Loud and clear!"
LEVIATHAN
his merch collection
"H- Huh!?" Leviathan fell out of his seat at your sudden question. You chuckle quietly at his reddening face. It was a simple question of 'what do you like more, me or all your merch collection' and he's already gotten this flustered.
"Well, I- uhm, well..." He's stumbling over his words, looking around his room. He did really love his all the items he's collected throughout the years, but he also really loved you. Dread settles in his stomach when he realizes just how much he loves you because... is becoming a normie!? Why would he sell every last drop of merchandize for you? He'd give up videogames, anime, fantasy novels, all for you if you truly asked him too.
You watch as he spirals, mumbling to himself. You're a little worried now, poking at him cautiously. He doesn't react. "Uhm, Levi? It was just a joke, you don't have to think so seriously..." You say, before he's sitting back up, staring at you with wide, watery eyes. Shit, you almost felt a little guilty for asking him now.
"I... I love you... More... Yeah." He nods, his face on fire as he takes a nearby figurine and holds it close to his heart. You decide to leave, to let him come to terms with his newfound realization that he, Leviathan, who had sworn off any real connections, has indeed made a connection with someone so profound he'd do anything for them.
It'll take him a while to come to terms with this.
SATAN
enchanted books
"Don't be ridiculous, obviously I love you more than my enchanted books." He rolls his eyes at your question. Was it not obvious how madly in love he was with you? Did he need to be more outright and forthcoming with his affections?
"Yeah, but wouldn't you be sad without your books?" You ask, looking through his bookshelf. Satan's eyes follow your every move, a small smile tugging on the corner of his lips as he sneaks up behind you, before wrapping his arms around you and resting his chin on your shoulder.
"Well, yes I would be, but life would be much more dull without you by my side." He confesses. "Unfortunately for both of us, I need you more than anything else now." He pulls away slightly, so you can turn around in his arms and give him a pointed look- what does he mean by 'unfortunately'? He can read you easily, and decides to explain. "I just mean I hope you don't plan on leaving anytime soon, I fear I might not be able to let you go."
Placing a light peck on your cheek, Satan pulls back to look into your gaze. "But don't go thinking you can throw away my books now, okay?" You stifle laugh, nodding.
"Wasn't planning on it."
ASMODEUS
new clothes
"I can't believe you would think- obviously I love you more!" Asmo scolds, huffing and puffing at your words. He's offended you would think he loves anything more than you! "Of course I do really enjoy new clothes, but they'd just be boring if I didn't have you to show them off to! or have you to help me accessorizes with, or-" You place your lips on his for a sweet kiss (mostly to stop him from lecturing you).
"Okay, I understand, 'm sorry for asking." Asmo blinks a few times, a little dazed by your kiss (he always is) before crossing his arms over his chest.
"Oh no, don't think that'll make me forget." He scoffs, shaking his head. "Do you realize how worried I am now, thinking that you don't feel loved enough?" He sighs dramatically, blowing some hair out of his face. "I think this calls for a date night." He's got a mischievous little twinkle in his eye. "Don't you think?"
"Oh my," So this is what he was getting all worked up for. "I agree, I think I need you to show me just how much you love me~" You coo, playing into his antics. He grins, pulling you close to him.
"Thought so," he hums, nuzzling into you. "I know just the place to go, too. Shall we get ready together?"
BEELZEBUB
burgers
"You... or burgers?" Beel asked, stopping midway to bite into the delicious, juicy burger he ordered. Beel gives you a sad look, and you instantly feel a kick to the gut. You regret asking, his little frown making your heart twist into knots.
"I-" You go to laugh it off, to tell him that you were only messing around, but he cuts in before you're able to.
"I love you more. Really." He finally takes a bite of his burger, which your grateful for, before he's taking your hand in his, giving it a light squeeze. "I know I'm not great at showing my feelings... But I'll try better from now on." He says, full of earnest. Oh, your heart is shattering. You lean across the table, cupping his cheeks and giving him a big kiss.
"No, I'm sorry Beel! I know you love me, I was just trying to be silly, 'm sorry I got you so worried!" He seems to relax a little at that- so you were just pranking him? He lets out a shaky breath of relief, that's good to know. Still...
"I see... Well, I will still try to show my feelings more."
BELPHEGOR
his pillow
"Don't be ridiculous," Belphegor huffs at your stupidity, rolling over in his mix of blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals. "What a stupid question." He shakes his head, "I knew you were dumb but geez..." He peeks a glance at you, before continuing. "Obviously those two things are the same."
You can't see his cheeky, shit-eating grin but you can feel it. You throw a pillow at him, exclaiming "I am not a pillow!" for the umpteenth time. He swats the pillow away, snickering to himself.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever ya say." He snickers, cozying up in his bed, feeling his eyelids grow heavier. "Either way, you're my favorite so... don't get all huffy, 'kay?" Your cheeks grow a little warm at his sleepy confession, and you sneak a little closer to him.
"Belphi-" You let out a shriek as he pulls you into the bed with him, swiftly positioning you both so his head is resting atop of you. You groan, you should've seen this coming. "You brat, let me go."
"Sorry, but I plan on using my favorite pillow- I mean, human, to help me sleep, so quit your yapping, will you?"
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97kuu · 1 month ago
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ONLY ON CAMERA pt.2
Part 1 here
summary; On the night of the Korean Music Awards, he planned to light up the group chat with every second caught on film—the way you yielded to him completely and took every bit of his pleasure.
Au; fwb! Secrete rleationship au! ! Jungkookidolau! Readerpopularidolau!
wc: under 3k
Warnings; sm^t, Dirty t^lk, public s^x, recording, dub con, or^l (m ), Slight plot, s^xualization, faci^l, after care, slight bond^ge, legs over shoulders pos, descriptive s^x, descriptive mast^rbat^^n (M), recorded , vocal jungkook, jungkook focused, i may have went overboard this time, cr^^y pu^^sy,
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It was the night of the KMAs, held in China this year. You sat with your group, dressed in a sleek, mid-thigh black pencil skirt paired with a cropped button-up blouse—part of your group’s office-themed concept. A soft blanket covered your legs, a courtesy given to those wearing skirts and dresses.
Your group was scheduled to perform near the end of the show, a testament to your rising popularity both internationally and in Korea. With BTS up next, Jungkook’s mind raced with a plan to get you backstage before the night was over.
His idea was simple yet clever. Knowing he’d push himself to the limit during their performance, he could easily claim he needed water and a moment to sit down. A commercial break would follow right after, giving everyone—fans and idols alike—a chance to refresh themselves. Conveniently, the group performing after BTS had a pre-recorded set, which meant the arena would go dark for a few minutes.
The placement of your groups worked to his advantage too—girl groups were seated close to boy groups. All Jungkook had to do was walk past and casually mention that something about your outfit seemed to be coming loose, suggesting you needed to change quickly. It was the perfect excuse to slip away together, at least in theory.
With time slipping away, Jungkook and his band members headed backstage to change, touch up their makeup, and prepare for their performance. This year, they had two songs to perform, with the dance line separated as planned. Placing his in-ear monitor, slipping on rings, and grabbing his mic, he did one final check of his look in the mirror before heading out.
Thankfully, the main camera was often focused on your group’s section, making it easier for him to sneak subtle, suggestive movements and winks in your direction. He couldn’t help but feel blessed—their performance this year featured a mature concept with hip thrusts, floor choreography, and suggestive outfits that had all been pre-approved. It was the perfect setup.
As the performance ended, he struck his final pose, a playful kiss, and smirked subtly towards you. Bowing to the fans, he made his way down the side stairs of the stage, a towel handed to him. Suddenly stopping in his tracks, he turned towards you and, with a lighthearted, non-suspicious gesture, pointed out something about your top. His hand subtly shielded his mouth as he mouthed a comment about your button-up. To others, it looked like he was simply being protective, helping you avoid any unwanted exposure. The tight-fitting top had indeed shifted, subtly revealing your bra. Flustered, you discreetly covered yourself and excused yourself to go change.
Jungkook watched you leave, sitting down and counting the minutes. When the arena darkened for the pre-recorded segment, he seized the moment, slipping backstage and heading toward his group room. Jungkook quickly snuck through as the staff watched the stage in the front of their dressing room and snatched his phone out of his manager bag before sneaking to the bathroom where he figured you’d be.
Once he found it, he positioned himself near the private unisex bathroom reserved for idols, aware that only one person could use it at a time due to the PIN lock. His eyes scanned the area, searching for a cleaner, more secluded spot. Anticipation coursed through him, his mind racing with possibilities as he waited for you to come out.
Overhearing staff mentioned an unused lounge with a small sofa and a door nearby, he made a mental note. Checking his watch and biting the inside of his cheek, he heard the door open—and there you were. Freshly changed, looking even more irresistible.
“Oh, didn’t think I’d run into you,” you spoke formally to your senior, mindful that anyone could be nearby. Without a second thought, he grabbed your hand, leading you down the hall, the sound of your low heels clicking softly against the floor.
“Where are we going?” you whispered urgently. Jungkook glanced both ways before pressing you gently against the wall, his lips finding your neck. He leaned into you, his body pressing closer, a soft moan escaping your lips.
“I couldn’t take my eyes off you in that skirt—the way your hips swayed while you danced,” he whispered, pulling away from your neck.” You didn’t wear safety shorts on purpose, did you?” he added, his arm sliding around your waist, leaving you too flustered to respond.
“We have a few minutes, the lights are dim, and there’s a private room right here,” he murmured before returning to kiss your neck, this time with more urgency. Without waiting for a response, he pulled you closer, guiding you into a nearby secluded waiting area. Locking the door behind you, he lowered the lights and immediately began unfastening your bra beneath your thin, cropped cardigan.
You stood frozen in shock, surprised by his bold actions and his keen eye for noticing the lace panties beneath your black skirt. As he tossed your shirt and bra onto the couch, your breasts naturally perked up, catching his attention. Without hesitation, he pulled his phone from his back pocket and quickly snapped a picture.
With a sideways tilt of confusion, you asked, “Who’s that for?”
He scratched his head, gulping slightly. “The 97 chat… We made bets on who’d get to you first, and since I—” he trailed off, sending the picture to the group chat.
Your eyes narrowed, and a mix of irritation and disbelief flashed across your face. You turned around to grab your clothes, bending down slightly. Before you could react, Jungkook’s strong arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you back against him. In one swift motion, he spun you to face him, pushing both of you down onto the couch, his need for you palpable in every move.
“Just because I took a picture doesn’t mean I’m done here,” he murmured, his voice low, as he slowly removed his belt, his weight still holding you in place.
“You’re lucky, I don’t let just anyone get this far,” you muttered, your frustration lacing your words.
“You haven’t had anyone else, though, have you?” he countered, his tone more teasing now. “You give off that vibe like you’re hard to get, but I’m the one you let in.” He slowly wrapped the belt around your wrists, his movements calculated and deliberate.
“Get on your knees,” he commanded, his voice low and teasing, sending a shiver down your spine. His breath was warm against your skin as he slid your pencil skirt down with a slow, deliberate motion. His eyes remained fixed on yours, a smoldering intensity in them.
“Don’t act like you don’t crave this, don’t pretend you’re not addicted to the way I make you feel,” he murmured, his voice dripping with desire. “You’re the only one who can drive me to the edge like this… And I’m the only one who can give you exactly what you need.”
Jungkook reached for his phone on the counter, his fingers quickly swiping across the smooth surface. He unlocked it and opened the camera app, his focus intent as he positioned the phone, preparing to capture the moment.
Jungkook’s fingers gripped the waistband of his pants and boxers, yanking them down with deliberate force. His eyes locked onto yours, the demand in his gaze clear, as he moved with purpose, fully aware of the tension he was creating between you two. He was soft, his member semi-erected as he adjusted himself closer to place his tip and a few inches of member in your throat.
With the press of the record button on his iPhone, he softly cupped the back of your head and bobbed your throat up and down slowly on his shaft as he watched the screen take every moment of it.
To him it was an art, watching you softly gag his hardening member as he turned on the flash of his phone's camera above your head. Your gaze lingered, soft yet charged with an unspoken promise—a captivating blend of innocence and allure that made it impossible for him to look away. The gentle play of light across your features only heightened the tension, drawing him in closer, his pulse quickening with each lingering glance. The camera recorded every moment of the interaction.
“You suck as if you remember it by heart, why is that baby? Hm?” He teased, zooming on your tongue and swirling around his swollen dripping, and aching tip.
“That’s it, baby,” he groaned, his voice thick with satisfaction. “Keep going—you know exactly how I like it.”
With approval your tongue glides slowly over the smooth, warm surface of his tip, the slight sweetness of his precum lingering on your taste buds. Each swirl and flick of your tongue draws out soft, low moans, as you savor the familiar heat and taste of his cock.
You gently suck, letting the head roll between your lips, your mouth filling with his sticky essence. Your hand wraps around his shaft, fingers gripping just right, guiding your tongue in a slow, deliberate tease. Each movement is calculated, each lick a tantalizing promise as you savor every intoxicating moment.
“Good, just like that.” he muttered, his tone low and commanding. “You know exactly what I like.”
Pulling himself from the grips of your mouth and clasping around his cock, he paused the recording, his finger brushing lightly over the screen before he turned the flash off, the bright light dimming. With a swift motion, he set the phone down on the nearby table, the soft thud of it against the surface breaking the silence. The room now felt calmer, the glow from the phone fading as the tension hung thick in the air, leaving a lingering anticipation for what would come next.
Scanning the room, he quickly considered his options, thinking through what would feel right in the moment. He was torn between standing and just simple missionary, simple but he could penetrate deeply if he wanted too, which he did. However in your current position on the floor and time, he settled with a missionary on the couch. Satisfied with his decision, he gently helped you lay back onto the couch, ensuring you were comfortable as he positioned himself to move closer.
Checking you out from your eyes to your chest he slowly pulled the shirt over his head, the fabric sliding smoothly against his skin, revealing the toned muscles of his chest and abs. As he tossed the shirt aside, his movements deliberate, the defined lines of his abs were now fully exposed. The room seemed to heat up as the faint glow of light highlighted the curves of his body, the play of muscle and skin captivating, leaving you momentarily breathless. His chest rose and fell with each slow breath, the faint scent of his skin filling the space between you, drawing you in even closer.
He cupped your face gently, his thumb grazing your cheek as his voice dropped low with desire. “I can’t wait to see you covered in my mark, all mine,” he whispered, a smirk tugging at his lips. His eyes darkened as he traced your jawline, his tone laced with need. “You’ll look perfect with my essence all over you.”
Your eye roll didn’t go unnoticed. Jungkook’s fingers moved quickly, tilting your head back with a firm, deliberate touch. His gaze softened just for a moment, but his voice remained steady, “Keep that attitude, and you’ll regret it.”
Backing away, he spread your legs open and paused . He smirked to himself, eyes locked on the dark wet spot on your panties. With a slow drag of his tongue over his bottom lip, he grinned, clearly satisfied by what he saw. His gaze never wavered as he bit down on his lip, the sight of you wet with desire only fueling his hunger. the subtle sign of your desire pressing through was seen a quiet indication of your anticipation to him. A loud one if that .
Before Moving you so you laid more comfortable on the couch, he took off the belt he used as cuffs and positioned himself on the couch as well. Sliding your panties off in a swift motion, he soon takes hold of his rock-hard member and places it at your entrance before continuing.
Jungkook, now kneeling on the couch between your legs, gently lifts them up and over his broad shoulders. With your legs resting on him, you recline back, your body sinking into the couch cushions. He leans in closer, his hands gripping your thighs firmly, pulling you closer as he checks your position with careful attention. His eyes flicker with desire, but he’s cautious, making sure you’re comfortable before moving forward. With a quick glance to gauge your response, he gets the unspoken green light and pushes deeper into you, the pace starts off slow.
His pace builds gradually, each thrust deeper than the last, his movements slow at first, testing the rhythm between you both. With every push, the depth intensifies, making you both crave more as his hands tighten around your thighs, pulling you closer. His breathing quickens, and with each thrust, he becomes more confident, the steady rhythm turning into a forceful momentum. As the pace picks up, he watches you intently, ensuring you’re with him every step of the way. The intensity of his thrusts grows, each one sending waves of pleasure, as he drives deeper, pushing both of you to the edge.
Your moans spill out in soft, breathy sighs, quickly turning into deeper, more desperate sounds. Each one is a raw, unfiltered expression of pleasure, your voice catching with every sharp gasp. As the intensity grows, your moans become louder, and more urgent, punctuated by quick, broken cries that match the rhythm of your body. Every sound is a clear, intimate signal of your rising desire, each moans more primal, more intense, vibrating with need.
Anyone could hear the way he drew those moans from you, the raw, unfiltered sounds slipping through the walls, daring anyone nearby to wonder who it was and what was happening. But would they have the nerve to walk in and witness their cherished idols like this—lost in each other, bodies entwined, passion laid bare? Your back arched, fingers clawing at the couch arm for stability, each cries a direct response to the relentless thrusts of Jungkook’s hips. To an outsider, the sounds were obscene, a scandalous symphony of need. But to Jungkook, they were everything—each moan, each gasp, a siren song that pushed him harder, deeper. Every breathless, pleasure-soaked moan from your lips was a symphony he owned, a melody crafted for him alone. Each note ignited his senses, a raw, beautiful harmony that sent him spiraling deeper into desire.
With each deep thrust, Jungkook’s voice grew rougher, panting through his moans. “You sound so hot right now, baby,” he groaned, sweat dripping from his brow as his dark eyes locked onto yours. “Every moan… it’s like music to me. You’re driving me insane.”
He leaned in closer, his breath ragged. “The way you moan… you don’t even know what you’re doing to me.” His thrusts grew more intense, his voice thick with lust. “You sound so sexy… it’s like you’re made just for me. Every sound… it’s got me throbbing.”
He gripped your thighs tighter, his pace relentless. “You’re making me harder than ever,” he growled between heavy breaths. “Those moans… they’re unreal. Keep going… I need to hear more. You don’t know how close I am… you’re driving me out of my mind.”
Urgently Jungkook’s eyes lock onto yours, his dark gaze smoldering with an intensity that sends shivers down your spine. There’s a primal hunger in his expression, a raw, unrestrained desire that fuels each deep, deliberate thrust. His eyes wander over your body, taking in every arch of your back, every shuddering breath, every tremble beneath him. The way he watches you isn’t just passion—it’s possession, a silent claim, his focus never wavering as he drinks in the sight of you completely lost under him. Each movement draws a low growl from his throat, the darkness in his eyes deepening with every thrust, leaving you feeling utterly consumed by his intense, unwavering stare.
“I can’t hold back… shit,” he mutters, his breath ragged, the low timbre of his voice dripping with raw, biting desire. Jungkook’s breath quickens as he moves, low, guttural grunts escaping from his chest. Each sound is a blend of pleasure and exertion, his body tensing with every push. His voice is deep and ragged, a sign of the growing intensity as he loses himself in the moment. His groans are slow at first, drawn-out sounds of satisfaction, before becoming faster, more urgent, as his pace quickens. The sounds escape from him almost involuntarily, his body betraying him as the pleasure builds.
Jungkook comes to a sudden halt, his body stiffening as a sharp breath escapes his lips. His chest heaves with effort, beads of sweat dotting his skin as he fights to regain control. His eyes are dark with desire, and with a quick glance toward the nearby table, he reaches out to grab his phone. As his fingers fumble with the device, his breath comes out in short, ragged pants, the tension palpable in the air. His body still quivers, pulse racing as he presses record, eyes flicking back to you with that intense, smoldering gaze. The weight of the moment hangs in the air, the phone capturing the scene as he pauses, his breath still heavy, waiting for the perfect shot.
Sliding out of your wetness, he raises the phone, capturing the creamy trail clinging to his shaft, glistening under the dim light. Every slick trace of you is recorded, the camera lingering on his throbbing length. Stepping closer, he wraps his hand around himself with a firm, possessive grip, fingers curling tightly as he strokes. Each deliberate movement glides over the sensitive, veined skin, slick with the mess you’ve left on him. The slow, controlled rhythm intensifies, his thumb grazing the tip to spread the creamy evidence of your desire. With every pump, his knuckles tense, the veins in his forearm flexing, each stroke accompanied by deep, deep grunts. His dark, desire-filled eyes lock onto yours, never wavering as he positions himself above you. His breath grows heavier, ragged with anticipation, each exhale uneven as he edges closer—ready to mark your face with his release.
“Smile for the camera,” he growls, voice low and commanding, his eyes burning into yours. With a deep, guttural groan, his body tenses, muscles taut as he reaches his peak. His hand grips tighter, strokes becoming erratic, until finally, he releases in thick, hot pulses. The first wave of his release lands on your skin, spreading warmth as it splashes across your face. Each subsequent spurt coats you in a sticky, possessive claim, heat radiating from where it lands. The sensation lingers, warm and intimate, dripping down your skin. His breath comes in ragged pants, eyes locked onto the sight of his essence marking you, dark with satisfaction and primal hunger.
With a slight tilt of your chin to face up, he lowered his tip to your mouth so that you could lick the little drops of his cun off his tip. Pleased, he soon pressed the stop button ti the recording and sent it to the group chat.
Now texting, he waited for the large file to load before texting his account details with;
“pay up cunts” before getting off you.
With a deep, calming breath, he reached for the pile of clothes and quickly put them on, careful not to make anything seem suspicious. He knew people would be looking for him, and he didn’t want to raise any questions. He hurried to grab wet paper towels to help clean you up. When he returned, he found you sitting up, waiting, still shaken but trying to hold it together. He gave you a soft, reassuring smile, his gentlemanly nature shining through. Slowly, he knelt beside you, gently helping you clean up as you remained still, a little out of it, but grateful for his care.
“Thank you,” you said shyly as he stepped closer to wipe your face.
“You know I wouldn’t let you leave like that. No need to thank me,” he replied softly, tossing the towel aside. .
“Here, I’ll help you get back to your group’s makeup room. I’ll just say you slipped because the ground was wet,” he added, gently wrapping one of your arms around his shoulder to help you stand. After a brief pause, he decided to lift you into his arms bridal style.
Quickly grabbing his phone, you smiled up at him, and he returned the smile before carrying you out of the room.
Back at the makeup room, he explained what happened with a polite bow as the staff and your group manager thanked him. The manager informed him there were only 20 minutes left before he had to hurry back. With a nod, he ran back to his group, trying to avoid raising suspicion, his phone hidden in his pocket as much as possible. His members gave him concerned looks, but he awkwardly smiled, trying to downplay how it looked.
Later, an official notice was released about your sprained ankle due to a slip on some water on the ground. There was some gossip and speculation about whether the sprained ankle was a cover-up, but that remained a secret between you, him, and the footage captured on his phone. Something officially on camera.
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M.list This was a requested plot
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lustfxq · 13 days ago
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𝙁𝙄𝙍𝙎𝙏 𝙎𝙏𝙍𝙀𝘼𝙈 . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙋𝙏𝙀𝙍 1
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⋆.˚ ★— camboy!hyunjin x felix
warnings: exhibition,masturbation, cam streaming, smut, dirty talk ── ★
A/N: this is my first smut that i wrote so i hope u like it!! im new on posting fics but please enjoy!
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ✦ ‧₊˚ ⋅
after seeing all those celebrities doing onlyfans accounts, increasing their influence, seeing his friend felix doing it, hyunjin found himself curious. how much money do they actually make? is it such work enjoyable?
he decided his chase for fame shouldn’t limit to music and art. if one doesn’t work, the other can make up for it, so he signed up for an account on a popular cam site, the same his friend uses.
❝princehnj❞
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ✦ ‧₊˚ ⋅
weeks after, he began to post whimper asmr’s, dirty talking, audio only. his account pretty much blew up, the comment section full of girls thirsting over his voice, a few men here and there and his best mate, felix. he was always encouraging him, even telling his fans about hyunjin’s account.
all the people praising made him feel excited and flustered, wanting to show himself to see their reactions.
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ✦ ‧₊˚ ⋅
hyunjin sat on couch, put his laptop on the coffee table in front of him. he wore casual clothes, nothing too much since he didn’t know what this live would lead to. beforehand, he told felix about this and they chatted a while. he gave him tips, told him to not push myself into doing stuff he doesn’t want to and to watch out for creeps.
𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲…
people began to join.
𝘢𝘯𝘨3𝘭2: 𝘸𝘰𝘸
𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘧𝘧0: 𝘜𝘙 𝘚𝘖 𝘏𝘈𝘕𝘋𝘚𝘖𝘔𝘌
𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘦𝘱𝘶𝘱: 𝘖𝘮𝘨 𝘰𝘮𝘨 𝘰𝘮𝘨
he smiles shyly, waving his hand to the camera.
he takes a look at the chat. “so, this is me. i’ve decided to start recording like this too.”
𝘬𝘶𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘸𝘲: 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘩𝘰𝘵
“thank you” he replies to the comment, smiling.
𝗹𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝘅𝗶𝗲 𝗷𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗲𝗱
hyunjin started smiling harder, feeling a little embarrased. he looks at the chat.
𝟱$ 𝘁𝗶𝗽 - 𝗮𝗻𝗴𝟯𝗹𝟮: 𝘆𝗼𝘂’𝗱 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝘀𝗼 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗻𝗮𝗸𝗲𝗱
hyunjin stares at the sudden donation, surprised. he blushes a little, then chuckles.
“should i put on a good show then?”
fans go crazy in the chat, encouranging him. he feels lowkey ashamed because felix was there, but he did the exact same thing, and his friend was supportive, so he shouldn’t feel bad.
he lifts his shirt a little, releaving a part of his abdomen, moving the camera angle downwards for them to get a better view, then moving it back and bitting his lip playfully.
“whatcha think?” he asks.
𝘱𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘺𝘮: 𝘩𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬
𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘧𝘧0: 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘱𝘭𝘴
he smiles feeling proud of his body. he wonders if felix would say anything at all, wishing he did.
he unbottons his jeans. “felt horny today.” he looks at the camera, running his hand through his hair. hyunjin takes a moment to think about his next move, if he should indeed put on a show. he feels nervous about not strangers, but his friend seeing his nude body.
suddently, he gets a text on his phone that was next to him.
from: lixie🍓🐣
𝙙𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙 ���𝙮𝙪𝙣𝙜
hyunjin sees the notification pop up. reading it, he blushes. he felt warmer inside and more eager to do it.
he takes his jeans off, leaving him in his black boxers. he leans back, giving people a view of his now hard cock through the underwear.
“‘m so hard” he says and looks at the chat. donations keep coming in. he’s liking it. he palms himself and licks his lips.
𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘳3𝘭𝘻𝘺: 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘰𝘧𝘧
𝘬𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘱𝘢𝘸𝘷: 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘶𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘪𝘤𝘬
his breath quickened. he loved all the attention and him being treated like a toy turned him on in a manner he didn’t even think of. he inhales and exhales.
“gonna cum so fast if i do.”
𝟭𝟬$
𝟱$
𝟭𝟱$
he couldn’t belive it.
“you’re all so good to me.” he says and takes down his boxers, his length twitching as it hits his abdomen. he slightly gasps at the sensation of the cold air.
𝟮𝟬$ - 𝗹𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝘅𝗶𝗲
his eyes widen, almost letting out a moan.
“t-thank you lixie.” he mumbles, flustered.
hyunjin took it as a sign to continue. he puts his fingers into his mouth, sucking to get them so they get wet properly and strokes his cock lazily, moving his fist in circles, holding his tshirt up with the other hand. he whimpers, not very loud, but loud enough for the chat to hear. it got so hot, he feels like he’s burning. the only thing he can imagine is his friend watching his stream and many others worshipping him.
“won’t last long.”
he tries to read on the screen but his vision is blurry. he slows down and gets closer to the camera in order to see.
𝘴𝘶𝘻𝘻𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘯: 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘶𝘮
𝘷𝘰𝘪𝘥23:𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘣𝘰𝘺
oh how he loves these compliments. it’s so thrilling doing something so filthy yet being adored.
he hears a notification coming from his phone.
from: lixie🍓🐣
𝙖𝙢𝙖𝙯𝙞𝙣𝙜
he turns his head and when he sees another message from felix, God it went straight to his cock. he barely touches himself but this is overwhelming and he’s being sensitive. it is cleary for his fans that whatever he saw, made him not hold back. he stares at the camera, stroking faster, spreading his precum everywhere he can and pinching his nipple.
“a-ahh” his stomach tightens, feeling on edge.
“fuck, im cumming.” he lets out a whimper and his orgasms hits, moaning loudly as he milks himself, all ending up on his belly and thighs. he breathes heavily, throwing his head back and closing his eyes. he almost forgot he’s still streaming until he hears the donation sound. he opens his eyes, exhausted.
𝘱𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘺𝘮: 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵
𝘱𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘺𝘮:𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘤𝘶𝘮
𝘬𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯03: 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧
from: lixie🍓🐣
𝙨𝙤 𝙢𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙮…𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙙𝙞𝙙 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙡
hyunjin takes his phone. he blushes, feeling his heart beating out of his chest at the text. he then leans in to end the live and say goodbye.
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fangswbenefits · 11 months ago
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Comfortable
Summary: Astarion walks in on you in a rather compromising situation. Naturally, he offers to help, but then you ask him to promise you something that he was not expecting…
Pairing: Astarion x female!Tav
Warnings: 18+. Astarion's POV. Fluff. Aftercare. Oral sex. Pillow humping. Innuendo. Mentions of masturbation.
Word count: 3.3k
It's a wavering sequence of whimpers that catches Astarion's attention just as he arrives at camp after a late night hunt.
The blood on non thinking creatures seldom presents itself as a decent meal, but he finds it unfair to depend exclusively on you.
The boars in the outskirts of Baldur's Gate are delectable enough to blind his hunger for a few hours – maybe a full day, if need be.
The camp seems peaceful and quiet with everyone still catching some rest after in their respective tents, and as the pale moon glows up high in the dark blue sky, he notices the dawn isn't breaking for at least a few more hours.
Maybe he can indulge in a trance to ease his mind and body after feeding, even though it's not a dire necessity.
But it seems that the night has other plans reserved for him.
His steps are light and sure, following the crescendo of sounds that seems to come from near his tent.
He would recognise that voice anywhere.
You.
As he draws near, trying to make out the origin of said whimpers, he vaguely wonders if you're having a dream.
That is the most reasonable explanation.
But then he hears what resembles a muffled groan.
A nightmare?
Instinctively, an eyebrow quirks as he approaches your tent.
And then he freezes.
Even through the obvious failed attempt at reining yourself in, he knows exactly what he heard.
His name. Muffled and barely intelligible, but his name, nonetheless.
An amused smile tugs at his lips as it dawns on him that you are indeed pleasuring yourself. Risky and unexpected, but beyond a shadow of a doubt.
Cheeky…
He could simply entertain this, and leave it to you to reach your peak on your own.
Unfortunately for him, he has just fed.
And unfortunately for you, he has every intention of interrupting your solo endeavour.
His usual cool body now flooded with the warmth and vigour that make it extremely easy not to succumb to your sweet and melodic whimpers.
As such, he tugs at the strings that hold both flaps together, successfully drawing a surprised gasp from you.
“You scared me!” 
He finds you propped up on one elbow before rushing to sit and pulling a blanket to cover yourself, a mortified look splattered across your face.
The sight in front of him is enough for the recently drunk blood to rush downwards at record speed. 
Predictable, but such is the nature of his body when it comes to you.
Flustered and quickened breaths. His senses are so sharp from the recent blood intake, that he can hear your heartbeat drumming fast in your chest.
By now, he knows you well enough.
So well, that he's sure he has just interrupted your climax.
The confirmation comes in the form of a low growl of frustration.
He almost feels sorry for you, but what crosses his mind is the offer of a moment of pleasure so great only he can provide.
“You were close.”
It isn't a question and he doesn't expect an answer.
But you're so visibly irritated that you scowl deeply. “Yes! Yes, I was. Thank you so much for interrupting.”
“My pleasure,” he retorts, knowing fully well he's about to set off a bomb if he doesn't choose his words carefully.
You have a temper he adores to test. He's used to dancing to your tune and knows exactly which strings to pull to get you riled up in ways that often lead to very enjoyable outcomes.
His cock welcomes your huff of annoyance with a faint twitch.
“Why didn’t you just… wait…” you almost cry out in sheer frustration.
He lets out a taunting laugh. “What, and miss out on all of the fun, darling?”
A dramatic pout settles your lips and it takes all of his self-control not to wipe it off your face with a kiss in an instant.
“How many did you take this time?”
It is a glaring taunt.
And your mouth drops open.
Maybe he should have eased his way in, considering the current predicament.
But the way your body is all flustered and heated from your own touch is enough to flare desire inside him. And whenever desire begins to swell inside him, the fine line between reason and pleasure begins to blur. 
Mostly because he knows he was the one on your mind when you had your fingers deep inside you.
Your eyes widen slowly, and you clutch the blanket closer to your lower half, still hiding the proof of your arousal from his prying eyes.
You don't reply at first, your pride keeping you silent.
But Astarion doesn't mind. In fact, he enjoys your resistance at first. Makes it all the more enjoyable when you finally give in.
“How many, darling?”
You frown, averting your eyes.
So stubborn…
His cock adores it.
“How many?” his tone is firmer this time and you slowly meet his eyes again.
“... two.”
He clicks his tongue, crouching before you. “Oh, darling…” 
Two fingers are not nearly enough to provide the fullness and stretch that only his cock can. But he appreciates your effort nonetheless.
It's quite adorable and enough to have his cock hardening even more.
Your fingers still glisten in the faint candlelight and he feels the sudden urge to have them in his mouth. He never tires of tasting you in more ways than one.
“You do not need to hide from me,” he says tenderly, but still not moving an inch. He wants you to feel comfortable enough under his gaze. “You've bared yourself to me many times, love.”
Still, you don't let go of the fabric, a slash of defiance crossing your face. “You took too long.”
Ah. “Did you miss me?”
You bite your lip, face softening as you nod twice.
And you were so desperate for him that you just couldn't wait?
Gods.
His cock stirs even more against his trousers at the silent realisation.
“And I am here now,” he says, dropping to his knees, as a wicked smile turns his lips. “So, allow me.”
He reaches out with his hand to tug at the fabric, silently looking for your permission.
A shaky sigh parts your lips and he spots a shiver as he pulls the blanket that keeps you from him.
His eyes drop to the sweet spot between your legs and he almost regrets having interrupted you.
Almost.
Your clit is so swollen it deliciously peeks from between your folds, parting them gently. It throbs faintly as he catches your clenching a few times, wetness dripping out.
After a moment, he manages to tear his gaze away, ignoring the twitches of protest from his cock.
He finds your half-hooded eyes. “May I?”
You hesitate at first, nearly pressing your thighs together, but he stops you with both hands on your knees, a reassuring grip that has you slowly but surely loosen up under his touch.
“You don't have to…”
No, he doesn't.
But he wants to.
In fact, he thinks he needs to.
He rubs circles along your flushed skin, wanting your full attention on him before he speaks, “I appreciate the concern, darling, but I'm impossibly hard and you look incredibly delectable.”
It's more than enough to have you yearning for more, as a surprise gasp parts your lips.
You finally nod, spreading your legs and leaning back as you settle on your elbows.
He offers a sly grin, lowering and positioning himself right where he craves to be.
But not before he eases some of the growing tension on his lower half. The blood coursing through his body is more of an inconvenience for now, and he's sure, under different circumstances, he'd have better control over this.
Or maybe not.
Maybe you're just that good for him.
You jerk slightly when his mouth draws near your slick folds.
“Wait.”
And he does, his concentration slightly shaken as he promptly scans your face for any cause for alarm.
“Just… don't leave afterwards.”
Don't leave–
Astarion's lips are so close to your clit, he has to pull back slightly so he can have a proper look at you, his hardened cock still straining against his undergarments.
“What do you mean?” he asks, perplexed. 
There is hesitance in your eyes. “You tend to leave after… like you don't want to be here with me.”
That sounds like a whiplash to him, because it is not true at all.
Your words take him by surprise  and he immediately worries he may have said or done something that could be interpreted as mixed signals.
“Darling, I–”
But you immediately shake your head. “If you can stay after… I'd appreciate it. Only you want to, of course,” you quickly add. “It doesn't feel right otherwise…”
It isn't a request. Nor a plea.
It's just what feels right.
He's done this many times to the point of instinct. It comes natural to him to please others. The aftermath, though, is something that he's also used to forgoing. The mess, the sweat, the fluids… the unnecessary and forced talk…
But you are different, aren't you?
You are not… the others.
And after all you've been through, he feels his mind nearly snap in half as he realises just how much he's still holding back with you.
Even something as simple as just staying still felt… tainted.
Slowly, he nods. 
And slowly, your lips turn into a tender smile that he's grown to adore beyond comprehension.
“I'll stay.”
You heave a deep sigh of relief. “Thank you.”
Astarion counters the impromptu detour with unmatched expertise, lowering his head and admiring just how eager your body is for him.
Before he drags his tongue along your folds, he slithers his hand down to reach for the front of his trousers, hurriedly undoing them.
It's his turn to sigh in relief as his cock is set free.
But now he misses the friction and the carpeted floor of your tent feels too rough.
His eyes roam around in search of something – anything – more comfortable.
And then he's caught off guard by your offer.
“Maybe this will help.”
A pillow.
He chuckles deviously, appreciating your creativity in moments such as these. Promptly, he takes it in his hand and positions it under him, his cock welcoming the soft surface.
“I adore that mind of yours,” he says cheekily.
You are about to voice a reply, but no word comes out when his tongue hits your entrance. 
Immediately, your hips buck and his smile never wavers.
He knows what you crave, but he will take his time even if you're already close to the edge.
After all, he's addicted to his devotion to you even if he never utters it out loud. He prefers his actions speak for themselves. Words are treacherous and deceiving. Actions speak louder.
And so he indulges in you. He indulges you, because that is what keeps him from reaching the frayed ends of his mind. 
You're what grounds him these days.
And he will ground you with him.
As such, he drags the tip along your folds, collecting your wetness and he only stops once it finds your clit.
A soft moan escapes your lips and he hopes you have it in you to keep it down so as to not wake the others. 
He locks eyes with you one last time. “Are you ready, darling?”
Your hips roll twice, but he knows you're not ready. You never are for the pleasure he offers to you so passionately. 
Another roll and he knows you're growing impatient, so he gives your clit a quick swipe of his tongue before he latches.
He doesn't begin suckling hard right away, as he needs to ensure he can steady you for what's to come. Both arms loop around your thighs and he allows his eyes to flutter shut, losing himself in you.
It amazes him how your body responds to him, and your hips try to find a desperate rhythm as if you're riding his cock.
The pillow under him provides enough friction for him to roll his own hips, eager to match your tempo.
He could feel the wetness drenching the fabric, but he can't bring himself to care.
Your hand finds his curls and he growls against your clit as you tug gently, but evidently craving more.
And more he gives you.
He's sucking more fiercely this time, taking his time to savour the swell in between his teeth. From this angle, he can feel your wetness coating his chin. He can't directly feel it, but he just knows you're clenching desperately around nothing.
Maybe he should take it slower.
Maybe he should pry you open with two of his fingers, even though you're wet enough to take a third one.
But the unexpected friction caused by the pillow is begging to edge him beyond belief.
Is it from the blood he drank? Is he just so ridiculously aroused? Why is your clit so swollen this time? Is it from his incessant suckles? 
His mind turns into haze and he decides he's not looking for any logical answers.
He simply allows his hips to move on their own accord, matching the face with each suckle.
“Astarion… Gods…” 
You're fortunate his mouth is kept busy, or he'd hurl a snarky reply. Gods have no place here. The delicacies of carnal bliss are reserved for those who tread the earth.
He's the only one who'd ever worship you, and you'd worship him right back, because that's how it's meant to be.
Precum drips from his tip at an alarming rate. He's too hard. He's too aroused. His body is seeking to be inside yours.
But he decided against it.
No.
He wants to see you unravel for him and in front of him.
His eyes open once again and he takes in the sight of your body undulating. Skin all flushed and eyes read to drop close as you near the precipice.
As always, his latch is impeccable. He never lets go and takes pride in leaving you dripping for him.
A few droplets run down his chin and dangle from it, bestowing upon him the most enticing silent praise he could ask for.
He knows you're close when your fingers close around his curls, desperately rocking your hips against him.
A low growl of approval rumbles in his chest and he's starting to struggle to keep his pace.
He has to find a way to still his hips before you reach your climax in fear you'll drag him along with you far too soon.
And so he does.
This time, he wants to see it.
He wants to see you as you come for him.
He's mostly perplexed that you found a way to muffle your moans, your shirt rolled up and captured in between your teeth, granting him the privileged view of your heaving breasts and hardened nipples.
Momentarily, his hips threaten to buck driven by pure instinct.
But he manages to hold back.
And when he's sure you're too far gone, head tilting back and legs shaking ever so slightly, does he unlatch from your clit.
He pulls back enough to witness the first sets of contractions course through your body. 
Wetness drips from his chin, and he can't tear his gaze from the mesmerising way your entrance clenches rhythmically before him.
He's felt those contractions many times. He is well aware of just how vicious and relentless they can be around his cock, never failing to draw every last drop of his cum deep inside you.
Your muffled cries and the way your hips still momentarily, are all he needs to get lost in his own pleasure again.
He props himself high enough to place his hips at the right angle, rolling them urgently against the soft fabric of the pillow.
He's so close… so deliciously close.
Your taste lingers on his tongue and the vision of you still writhing under him holds his gaze almost painfully.
Your fingers ease on his curls and he feels the familiar tightening of his balls warning him that he's about to reach the point of no return. 
It comes and overtakes his body so violently his mind blanks for a brief moment, as his mouth drops open.
He wants to groan and growl and hiss, but no sound comes out.
The friction is so overwhelming, he can't help but to lose balance, his lips finding your swollen clit once again.
And just like before, he latches instinctively and you try to jerk away from him, definitely being hit with a sting of oversensitivity. 
He comes undone, suckling on you harder than ever before.
Ropes of cum spill from him rhythmically, his own contractions taking over. He can feel the fabric underneath him drench with each thrust, and he vaguely wonders how much of it he still has left in him.
Your clit is now the only thing grounding him as he rides out his climax and, in the far corner of his hazy mind, he's thankful that you eased into him once again, granting him the solace he is seeking so desperately.
There's only so much he can withstand as his senses are flooded with overwhelming pleasure, and he finds himself unlatching and almost slumping against your lower abdomen.
He's spent.
Utterly spent.
He thinks he hears a tender giggle, but maybe it's simply his mind playing tricks on him.
With effort, he hoists himself along your body, collapsing, the side of his face resting against your stomach.
He wants to say something, but he's rendered silent by the aftershock of his climax.
And that's when he feels your fingers again, raking along his scalp and through unruly curls. 
“Are you leaving?”
He says nothing.
Your fingertips work their magic along his skin and he's sure you can lull him into a trance if you so wished. 
You're too powerful and he's too in love with you to care.
“Astarion.”
Your voice is low and sweet and he hums in return, arm wrapped around your waist.
“Can we stay like this for a while?”
Who's he to deny you of it? Or himself?
He's sweaty and his cock drenched in cum and precum and you're a mess yourself. Hardly the epitome of romance.
Or maybe he's wrong because when you bring a soft piece of cloth to his temple and drag it along his face, he suddenly gets it.
He finally understands why you want him to stay.
Why it makes sense.
His eyes flutter shut as he basks in your tenderness and adoration. 
You hum a soft tune under your breath, cleaning him up.
Face and neck first.
“Can you shift higher?” you ask.
He realises your intentions and lifts his head to stare at you.
“You don't have to.”
All you do is offer him a smile. Your smile. “I want to. Allow me, lover.”
No one has ever taken care of him. No one has ever bothered to. Not until you. 
He silently does what you asked, too stunned to come up with a clever tease.
His eyes flutter shut in what comes close to embarrassment. For some reason, he feels more exposed than ever when you wrap the cloth around his cock.
“Tell me if it gets too much,” you say, your voice but a whisper.
He immediately shakes his head. “Not with you.”
A hiss parts his lips as you tenderly take care of him.
Astarion rests his head just above your breast and 
“Do you wish to talk?” he asks.
Your lips find their way through his damp curls, placing a kiss atop his head.
“Do you want to?”
He chuckles, feeling his cock soften in your hand – definitely a first. “I fear I'm too drained to do so.”
“Silence it is,” you say and he feels your warm breath against his skin.
Not just any silence.
Comfortable silence.
The rare type old romance books mention in passing and that many seek to no avail.
But he's found it because he's found you.
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Masterlist
3K notes · View notes
chrisevansonly · 11 months ago
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Mr.Clingy
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lando norris x female reader
synopsis: everyone thinks you’re the clingy one in the relationship…turns out it’s lando
warnings: none super fluffy some light humour
a/n: okay after the last two days and the ER last night i needed some nice light fluffy comfort with lando, im hoping to maybe get a few other little things out today too now that im feeling better🫶🏻
It would take photo evidence to convince anyone that Lando Norris himself was the clingy partner in your relationship. Everyone was quick to assume it was you and not your ever so cheeky boyfriend, who had more sass than the average man: but no, he was a level 10 clinger.
And you loved it.
Lando was home with you for a few days before he’d head over to Barcelona to do some testing for McLaren. After spending the day with working on a few projects you’d started at the end of the season around the house, to the baking you’d done, this moment right now was by far the Brit’s favourite.
Lando had you trapped under him, his arms around your back as his face was smushed against your chest, resting right on your boobs, aka Lan’s favourite pillows. Your hands alternated between rubbing his back to gently cascading through his curls, no doubt preparing for the inevitable of less cuddles and quality time when the F1 season got started in a mere few weeks from now.
“No one would ever know..”
Your voice cut the silence in the room, a teasing tone to it as Lando hummed
“What..”
“No one would ever know how you’re the clingy one baby”
Laughing as his arms tightened around you, he brought his head up so he could look at you, a grumpy pout on his face.
“Stop complaining”
You threw your head back, not being able to hold back your laughter at his grumpy attitude, he remained stoic, his eyes narrowing at you while you laughed. Lando waited until you were done before you smiled and leaned up to press a kiss to his lips.
“I’m not complaining I find it quite sweet, plus I love your cuddles”
“Yeah I know you do.”
Lando tried to keep his face serious but as you stared at him with a raised brow he finally broke, a sheepish smile on his face.
“I love you…”
“Yeah you better or i’m taking your pillows away”
At the sound of this Lando looked at you in shock causing you to laugh once again
“You wouldn’t dare take away my girls!”
“Your girls?”
“Yes mine!”
His eyes widened in shock at your obvious questioning
“Last time I checked my boobs were mine, they are attached to my chest..”
“Nuh uh, they may be on your chest but they’re mine, they’re never going anywhere”
Lando was quick to rest his head back on your chest and keep his hold tight on you as if he thought you’d get up and run away.
“For the record…I love you too Lan, especially when you’re clingy”
Nothing else needed to be said, a comfortable silence filling the room once again as Lando soaked up every second he had with you like this. It wasn’t the fancy dinners, the post podium celebrations, or even the vacations you both took together. It was all these little moments you had just to share amongst yourselves.
Even when Lando still wouldn’t admit your cuddles were the best or that he indeed was the clingiest boyfriend ever.
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thef1diary · 9 months ago
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Baby Jr | One
— Friendly Banter
Series summary: The teasing, fleeting touches became much more on the night Carlos won, the sexual tension between you two reached a breaking point. Perhaps it was that night, or the many nights that followed, but you were pregnant with his child, putting you in a difficult situation.
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© thef1diary 2024. all rights reserved. Do not copy, steal, translate, or repost any of my work.
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pairing: carlos sainz x reader
Warnings: allusions to smut but no actual smut yet
wc: 2.9k
Note: here it is, the first chapter of many more to come. lemme know what you think, feedback is always appreciated.
You had caught the eye of a certain Ferrari driver from the moment you joined the team. He always looked at you in fascination, having the urge to find a way to figure you out but that's all it was for the longest time. Until it wasn't.
Carlos Sainz vividly remembers the first time he set his eyes on you. He was on his way to leave the headquarters in Maranello while you were on your way inside. Carlos' gaze was watchful, almost heavy with judgment as you hurried in through the doors with more items in your arms than you should've been able to carry.
He almost stopped you to ask who you were, but he noticed the badge clipped onto your jeans, media personnel. You had already passed him before he could read your name, and shook his head knowing that your name was the more important detail compared to your role.
You hadn't noticed him that day, but he noticed you.
He didn't see you again until the new season came around, having almost forgotten about your brief encounter at the end of the previous year. He had to do a double take once he saw you setting up the cameras for some content he was supposed to record along with his teammate.
It was a simple video that required the drivers to answer a few questions sent in by their fans, something that should've been easy since they've done it before. But he couldn't focus on anything but you. Given that you were the ones asking the questions, reading them off the short stack of cards you had in your hand, he wasn't outed for being distracted.
Knowing the drivers still had a busy day ahead of them, you began packing up the items once the video was filmed. Keeping your eyes locked on the task, you expected the drivers to be led away by their PR managers, so you were surely startled once you heard a voice acknowledging you.
Carlos stayed back, and roaming your gaze for a split second behind him, Charles had left. You knew who he was of course, after all you followed the sport for many years before you were given the opportunity to work for one of the teams.
"I don't think we properly met, I'm Carlos." He extended his hand out and you gladly accepted, shaking it while introducing yourself. You found it sweet that despite being one of the two faces of the team, he still introduced himself like you didn't know who he was.
As a junior media employee who was still relatively new to the team, you were informed in advance that you would rarely be interacting with the drivers.
So it wasn't surprising that while working in the same team, you rarely saw Carlos in person. Working under Silvia—the head of communications—you would usually be the one tasked to edit the challenge videos, creating enough content from various footage to keep the fans engaged. The few times you did see him in person was to conduct media challenges that the team planned every once in a while to give the fans a chance to know the drivers underneath their helmets.
As the season went on, you found that you were indeed given the wrong information; you did in fact meet the drivers again and again. You were given many opportunities to travel with the team, and it would've been absurd if you denied those opportunities—not that you had a choice since you were needed at almost every race.
You were glad to experience the thrill of Formula 1 from the front row seats, able to watch all the sessions in the weekend itself but also be a part of the journey with the drivers that not many people get to see.
It was inevitable to befriend many people along the way, especially with their welcoming nature despite some news outlets suggesting otherwise. Formula 1 could be considered as one giant family that obviously had issues every once in a while but no one outside of the sport could relate to them like each other. Especially since it was described like a traveling circus by a few drivers.
While you had befriended many other employees whether it was within your team or others, you also spoke to the other eighteen drivers often.
But no other driver invaded your thoughts like Carlos did.
You didn't know if you were overthinking it all, but you believed that Carlos was a tad bit too friendly compared to Charles or even any other driver for that matter.
Whether it was a compliment that left you a blushing mess, a lingering look that followed you until you left the room, or even a small graze of his fingers against your back while crossing your path, you couldn't think of anyone but him lately.
You heard a Monégasque accent calling your name and you slowed your pace, allowing him to catch up to you as you greeted without needing to look to see who it was, "Charles"
"Here, it's still hot," he was holding two disposable cups of coffee in his hands, extending one towards you.
You gestured to your own hands, carrying one too many things again.
He sighed, "I still don't know how you do that." He stopped walking as he neared a surface to put down the cups. "Here, give it to me," he spoke but didn't let you make a decision as he grabbed the various folders, a clipboard, and a tablet from your hands. You were still holding on to a tripod and a camera but he freed up one of your hands so you could hold the cup.
"I will have to let you know, that tablet you're holding, is very valuable to the team," you stated, mainly in a joking manner because you knew he wouldn't do anything to it.
"Oh is it now? What's on it?" Charles asked once you resumed walking, this time sipping on your coffee before answering his question. "First, perfect," you hummed, gesturing towards the cup. "Second, it has all the schedules for meetings, interviews, and everything that you or Carlos could possibly need a reminder for during the weekend."
He gasped, almost offended, "I do not need reminders for anything during the weekend, not like Carlos does."
Despite how it may seem, your role didn't entail being a driver's assistant. In fact your job was to manage a few social media accounts and create content that included the drivers as much as possible but every now and then you also helped the company keep the public images of the drivers reputable.
Lately, Carlos had been finding reasons to talk to you, and most of that time would be spent reviewing his schedule multiple times throughout the day.
"He can be a little forgetful sometimes," you commented but Charles shook his head.
"A little? He needed you to remind him what time the race was."
You grimaced, knowing Charles was correct. "Well, you're his teammate so you know him better than I do."
"Yeah, I guess I'll ask him, thanks for the coffee," Charles stated as you two entered a meeting room. There were still fifteen minutes before it started, but you preferred to use that time so you could prepare yourself for all the notetaking it usually required. Since you were still a fairly new employee, you wanted to absorb all the information like a sponge.
Confused, you responded back, "you're the one who got the coffee."
He placed the items he was holding on the table, then noticing the time on his watch, a brief gasp overtaking his expression. "Thanks for the company then, I'll see you later," he playfully winked like he always did before leaving the room.
Moments later, a knock distracts you from reviewing the previous notes and stats from the last meeting. Thinking it was Charles, you ask, "did you forget somet- oh, Carlos."
"Are you busy?" He asks as he leans his forearms on the back of a chair. Shaking your head you respond, "not really, what's up?"
"I forget how crazy the crowds can get outside, so can I stay here for a few minutes?" You smile, "of course you can, come sit." He rolled a chair out and sighed in relief after finally getting off his feet.
Carlos closed his eyes for a moment relishing in the moments of silence in his hectic life. It didn't last long as you hummed a random tune which you usually did while working. It was so faint but since it was completely silent otherwise, Carlos' ears perked up as he heard it.
Instead of looking for the moments of silence he thought he needed earlier to even do a simple task as breathing, Carlos leaned forward with his usual watchful gaze focused on you. "Are you planning on more ways for us to make a fool out of ourselves?" He asked.
You chuckled, "I would never do that." Carlos gave you a look that indicated he didn't believe you.
"The last challenge was planned by you, no?" He countered and when you sheepishly smiled, he knew he was correct.
"You know, Charles is right," you spoke after a few moments of silence.
"How so?" He leaned back, stretching his arms above his head for a moment that almost caused you to lose track of your thoughts. You've gotten better at keeping yourself calm and collected around Carlos lately, but you still took a little moment to appreciate how his muscles flexed in the full sleeved shirt he wore.
"There's a team debrief happening in about five minutes where you're needed, and it's a bit of a walk so I'm wondering if you're gonna reach in time." To confirm your words, he glanced at his watch, raising his eyebrows when he realized you were spot on.
"You know my schedule so well now," he couldn't help but comment, chuckling as he did so.
"Only because you forget it," you retaliated.
"Maybe I do that on purpose," he stood up, once again stretching to the point where the hem of his shirt raised a bit, revealing a sliver of skin that your gaze immediately shifted to. While you might've gotten better, you still needed a bit more practice every now and then. Carlos chuckled when you didn't have a response right away, knowing you were distracted but he didn't feel the need to expose you just yet.
As he pulled his shirt down, your eyes snapped to his, finally coming up with a response "and almost get me fired for making you late?"
He shrugged, "maybe." You knew he would never do such a thing that would jeopardize your job, so you shrugged off his comment.
"Go now, Sainz" you urged, waving your hand to emphasize your point.
"I'm going, I'm going, relax, cariño." You could hear his laugh as he left the room, and you didn't focus on the papers in front of you until his footsteps had faded away.
It was just friendly banter, you reminded yourself even after hearing the nickname he gave you. Sometimes your conversations were borderline flirtatious, but it was still fine. Until it wasn't.
As the year progressed further, you were no longer just an employee with a career in motorsport; you were a member of the team that celebrated each high while consoling and sticking together during the lows.
While your job wasn't directly connected to the race, nor could you help in changing the outcome like the mechanics and engineers could, you helped uplift the mood in the room on multiple occasions.
Which is why when Carlos stood on the top step of the podium, claiming his first place trophy that would eventually become a part of a larger collection, you felt like you won.
The spray of champagne reached the crowd of his team waiting below the podium. A laugh bubbled up your throat as Carlos tried to aim the spill of the drink in the team principal's mouth standing on the floor a few feet away from you.
A proud smile grew on your face as you watched the drivers and a representative from your team that collected the constructors trophy gathered together on the top step to take a photo.
The celebrations continued in the team garage, since both drivers made it on the podium. The energy buzzing through each member was noticeable, knowing that this win would be celebrated until the next. After the team photo was taken, the champagne popped once again.
A few people were able to get away from becoming soaked, others were being targeted. Charles managed to slip away, but Carlos couldn't. He happily accepted the spray, soaking his race suit further after the podium.
His eyes however, darted across the crowd and landed on you. Standing just out of reach of the champagne shenanigans but still close enough to celebrate, Carlos decided to pull you even closer.
Grabbing the bottle from the nearest person, he covered the top and shook it. Releasing his thumb, he let the fizzy drink spray out, directing it at you this time. "Carlos!" You shrieked, but laughing nonetheless.
Once satisfied, he took a sip from the bottle, his gaze fixed on you as yours moved down to his neck, watching his Adam's apple bob while he swallowed. Passing the bottle to you, you moistened your lips before tipping it up and sipping the cool champagne.
His attention was diverted as Charles had found another bottle of champagne, deciding to drench his teammate even further after the celebrations began to die down. You smiled as Carlos tried to run away, dodging the alcohol, but it quickly dropped once he used you as a shield.
"Oh, no, no, no," you held your hand out at Charles who smiled mischievously, stopping in his tracks right in front of you.
"You are a part of the team," he commented, and you almost ignored his words as you felt Carlos' hands rest on your waist from behind, feeling his breath on your neck.
The heat of your thoughts was ruined when Charles decided to rain champagne down on you, cooling you off instantly. "Charles," you groaned, knowing that it would be an excruciatingly long process to wash all the champagne out of your hair, especially if it began to dry soon.
The team began to disperse, rightfully so as everyone wanted to change out of their champagne soaked clothes, you included. Trying to wring out as much liquid as you could, you muttered a curse under your breath. This was the first time you ever experienced a win like today.
Speaking of, the winner of the race was standing off to the side, shirtless. Carlos had removed his fireproof top but still had his race suit zipped down to his waist and placed a cap on his head backwards to keep his hair out of his face.
You parted your lips and watched his back muscles flex as he moved around, then hastily looked away as he turned. You kept wringing your shirt as he moved past you, and despite the fact that there was enough space for him to pass you without touching you, his fingertips brushed over your back, down to your waist. He lingered on your hip for too long, but he didn't say anything, only smiled when you inhaled deeply.
You had returned to your hotel room and immediately rushed towards the shower. The champagne from earlier had dried, creating an unpleasant sensation as a layer of tackiness remained behind. Washing away all the sweat and champagne, you sighed in relief, standing underneath the shower for a few extra minutes to release all the soreness in your muscles.
You still felt the buzzing excitement of the day running through your veins as you dried and dressed yourself, but you were also exhausted, ready to climb into bed and drift away into the safety of your dreams.
That plan was interrupted as you heard a knock on the door. Pulling your shirt over your body, you peeked through the peephole, smiling when you saw him standing on the other side.
"Oh hello, don't tell me you forgot your room number," you greeted Carlos as you opened the door.
Wetting his lips with his tongue, he was transfixed by the sight of your hair, still wet from your shower, dripping down to your shirt beginning to cling to your body.
"I think I did, tell me you don't remember it either," his voice dropped an octave, and his stare was no longer calculating, but rather enticingly seductive.
"And why would I do that?" You almost whispered, knowing the answer but wanting to hear it from him.
He stepped forward, leaning one arm on the doorframe while his gaze glanced over you to briefly look inside the room. "I'm sure yours is big enough for two people."
The corner of your lip turned up at his words, knowing it was just a ploy to let him in. The realization that he desired you just as much as you had grown to want him dawned on you as you stared at him standing in front of you.
Trapping your lip between your teeth for a moment, instantly attracting Carlos' gaze towards them, you nodded.
"Let's check," you stepped back, pulling him inside by the collar of his shirt.
——
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lcvclywon · 9 months ago
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─── ⋆ HE WAS A JOCK, AND SHE DID BALLET
back to masterlist
playlist
where...
Jake sim was a loser. Frat boy persona and charismatic antics aside, the moment Jake was alone with a girl he would freeze. Which explains his track record of having only slept with one girl all throughout college. That was until, you came in: Decelis' top ballerina and prized possession. Following a drunken one night stand and some (shitty) advice from his friends, Jake hopes you could help him out.
pairing ── jake x female reader
genre ── strangers to lovers, fwb (no smut tho!), college au, obvious x oblivious, denied feelings, veryyy lengthy fic
wc ── 16.6k
featuring ── jay, heeseung and sunghoon of enhypen, kazuha and yunjin of lesserafim, yuna and ryujin of itzy, seunghan of riize, soobin of txt, karina and winter of aespa, jisung and hyunjin of stray kids
warnings ── mentions of sex and hooking up, implied sex, suggestive at some parts, cursing, mentions of underage drinking, mentions of family issues, yn is kinda mean and bitchy (i tried to base her off of jo yi seo so!), mentions of crying and breaking down, mentions of blood and periods, kms jokes used, mentions of food, mentions of kissing, use of the word whore once i think, jake and yn arguing a lot
DISCLAIMERS! i'm not trying to sexualize jake nor any other idols, this is a work of fiction
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Beep beep beep!
Groggily you startled open rubbing your eyes trying to locate where the hell that blaring alarm sound was coming from. Finally finding the small slim black clock atop the nightstand you muttered a string of curses below your breath, slamming your hand down on it putting a stop to the shrieking rings. You immediately closed your eyes and attempted to lull yourself back to sleep pulling your black comforter over your head, arm grabbing for the pillow beneath you then- wait, you don’t own black comforters? 
Neither did you own a black alarm clock (not to be rude but who the hell even owned alarm clocks in this day and age?). Slowly you realised, you didn’t own any of this…fuck. 
Looking around trying to collect your thoughts you scanned the room to try and get a clue of which dude your drunken self managed to have a one-night stand with this time. Noticing a sleek leather wallet on the nightstand next to the alarm clock, you immediately grabbed it trying to see if there was a student ID, driver's licence, hell anything. Imagine your surprise when the first thing you saw was none other than a Decelis student ID laminated and shining with the name Jake Sim printed on it. Oh shit.
You muttered strings of curses under your breath, did you seriously have a one-night stand with Jake Sim? The proclaimed loser of the Decelis Soccer Frat? The same dude who had the reputation of trying (and failing) to let alone hold a proper conversation with the girl's gymnastic team? That Jake Sim? You scoffed under your breath, god you couldn’t believe this. Fuck you seriously needed to get a hold of your drinking problem. 
“Oh, you’re up” oh great. You were too busy trying to figure out how you got yourself into this problem that you failed to notice that said problem was standing there leaning against the bathroom door frame right in front of you. 
Whipping your head up you were greeted with the sight of Jake Sim, toothbrush in mouth, dishevelled mess, awkwardly smiling right at you. “Uh, Hi Jake.” you looked around awkwardly trying not to stare at him since he was practically half naked “Could you um, put on a shirt?” 
“Yeah, you’re kinda wearing it though…” 
You glanced down to see that you were indeed wearing his shirt, the large oversized plain black tee was so big it hung over you like a dress. 
“Right.” you said in an exasperated sigh walking past Jake into the bathroom with your clothes in hand to change
“Uh do you want breakfast? Tylenol? Are you hungover?” He was only met with the door shut in his face. 
“Yeah uh” you called out, muffled and in between grunts trying to change into your clothes as fast as possible, “No, not really! I kinda, you know, have to get back to my dorm.” 
“Oh yeah totally,” Jake replied awkwardly fuck how do you even talk to someone you just had a one-night stand with? Jesus, how did Heeseung do this shit. “Here.” you said opening the door to hand him his shirt. 
“Ah, thanks” Jake said quietly as he draped the shirt over his body. He stood there still brushing his teeth as he watched you pack your things up, shooting your head back to ask “Are the other guys still here?” 
“Nah, they all left to practise earlier” he replied watching you let out a slightly relieved sigh as you stood in front of his mirror tying your hair into a loose ponytail and touching up your makeup slightly “So…” he attempted to start before being cut off by you.
“Yeah um, thanks for whatever last night was Jake. Can’t really remember most of it, I’m sure it was good,” briskly lacing up your shoes you mentally cursed yourself for deciding to wear docs last night, “but maybe let’s not bring this up like, ever.” Finishing off with a tight knot and immediately pouncing up to only be met with Jake’s lost eyes and mouth slightly agape.
“Anyways! I really need to get going now so I’ll see you around ‘kay?” You walked backwards until your hand reached the door handle and turned it. The moment you stepped out you practically ran down the steps, cheeks and ears red, still muttering curses quietly, and regretting all the decisions you made last night. 
And there Jake Sim stood, hopeless as ever, watching the second woman he’d ever had a one-night stand with leave running. Fun. 
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Not to be full of yourself but you kinda had a reputation in Decelis, top ballerina, rich mother, the whole shebang. 
And well Jake on the other hand,
Me 
I think I just slept with Jake Sim
Kazuha Nakamura
EXCUSE ME 
Me
Yeah hahaha.. LISTEN I WAS DRUNK IDEK WHY I DID IT
Kazuha Nakamura 
SOCCER PLAYER JAKE SIM? THE FRAT BOY JAKE SIM? THE APPOINTED LOSER OF DECELIS SOCCER TEAM? ARE WE THINKING ABOUT THE SAME JAKE SIM HERE.
Me 
STOP YES THAT JAKE SIM. I KNOW i’m gonna kms 
Kazuha Nakamura 
Okay but was it good at least?
You paused, well it was good, but you shook your head remembering who you were talking about here. I mean it’s not like you and Jake were complete strangers, you went to high school with him, so yeah you knew Jake. But imagine the whiplash you got entering college realising you now attended the same school as Jake Sim the scrawny physics nerd, except now he was Jake Sim, star soccer player who grew up and gained some charisma. However, all you could see was teenage prepubescent Jake who used to rant about Einstein’s law of relativity. 
Yeah, not happening, you thought to yourself closing your phone as you headed into practise desperately hoping to drown out your memories of this morning with endless classical music and exercises. 
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Jake however, was still sprawled out on his bed even though it had been hours since you left. Face buried into one of his hands while the other scrolled through your Instagram profile, occasionally letting out annoyed sighs before groaning into his hand. How the hell did he even manage to screw this up.
“Jake, get up. I’m starting to actually feel bad for you” Jay let out at the sight of his friend curled up in agony, watching him with a mixture of sympathy and disappointment painted on his face.
“Dude you don’t get it, she RAN.” Jake cried out loudly sinking even deeper into his bed 
“Okay, I’m sure it wasn’t that bad. Maybe she just was startled, and like seriously you couldn’t have been that horri-”
“The one-night stand isn't the problem, the problem is that it was YN!” 
From what Jake could remember you, L/N Y/N, were basically untouchable in high school. I mean head of the dance club, straight A student, and not to mention you were one of the prettier girls that attended school with him; you were practically on a pedestal. The one chance he had to interact with you when he was 1. Not drunk 2. Not surrounded by his friends giving him an extra boost of confidence, he blew it. 
“Okay, so it was YN? So what man, I think you’re overthinking this” Sunghoon chimed in from the back 
“Hey I mean, I think you’re judging the situation way too early dude. If I were you I would see this as an opportunity!” Heeseung declared as he pranced into Jake's room
Briefly looking up from his phone, Jake shot Heeseung a judgemental glare before asking with a scoff “Okay well, since you’re the self-proclaimed expert here, mind letting me in on what you mean by ‘opportunity’”
“Okay listen,” Heeseung said while sitting on the edge of Jake’s bed “Here's what you’re gonna do: you’re gonna go up to her, start small talk, then you’re gonna ask her if you guys wanna do something casual-”
“Are you seriously suggesting I ask a girl to be friends with benefits after she RAN out on me” Jake screeched throwing his pillow at Heeseung (who thankfully caught it) 
“Hey let me finish!” He replied tucking the pillow under his arms “Yeah ask for something casual, and if she was so embarrassed and humiliated as you claim she’d reject you outright, but if not you get a casual fling with a cool girl. What’s not to love?” 
“Maybe the part where this whole thing is stupid, ” Jake grumbled, adjusting himself to sit upright to face Heeseung “, and why would I listen to you exactly?”
“Because a) as you said I am the expert,” Heeseung said before tossing the pillow under his arms back at Jake “and b) you genuinely need to gain some experience talking to girls. And this gives: you said experience, no strings attached!”
Jake leaned back on his headboard sighing to look up at the ceiling. God this was stupid, Heeseung seriously just wanted to make a fool out of him. How much experience did Jake seriously need, couldn’t he do that without this whole thing? I mean he had plenty of other girls to talk to right? Well…wrong. I mean, you couldn’t be that embarrassed, could you? What other chances did he have, hell this was the second person he’d ever slept with since entering college (an astounding fact even to Jake). Was it worth a shot? 
“Fine.” Jake replied with a sigh. Fuck he was really doing this.
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Closing the door behind you, your hands fiddled through your bag trying to find your pastel pink airpods, ready to blast music in your ears after a long chemistry exam. Putting them on, finger hovering over the play button, you were suddenly interrupted by a small tap on your shoulder. Turning around to see the one person you were trying to avoid all week, Jake fucking Sim.
“Oh Jake, I didn’t know you took chem?” 
“Yeah, I didn’t, well last year I didn’t…but I had to bump up my GPA a bit so I thought chem would be easy enough. But it’s,” Jake replied looking up and recalling the questions of that harrowing exam he just took “Yeah it’s ass.”
You let out a slight chuckle, well he’s funny at least. “Yeah, that test was not my best work…”  
Jake grinned at your comment, speeding up a bit to match your pace. “Hey wanna go grab some coffee?” His words laced with nervousness “I’ll pay! Well, I was the one who suggested it so I really should be paying, shouldn’t I… Anyway, my treat.”
And that’s how you found yourself seated across from Jake sipping an iced americano, legs crossed, looking around awkwardly, in dead silence. 
Jake had tried to start some small talk but was met with nothing but concise and quick answers from you. Fuck you Lee Heeseung, he mentally cursed. “So..” he awkwardly started “How was your weekend?” 
“I think you know how my weekend went Jake” you said in between sips 
“Oh, right.” Jake said remembering how it was just this Sunday when you booked it out of his apartment. “Uh about that-”
He could barely finish his sentence before you rushed to reply “I thought we weren’t going to bring that up”
“Yeah but-” 
“Listen, Jake” you let out with a sigh, placing your drink down on the table in front of you “You’re like, a nice guy and all. But I just really really can’t do relationships right now, like I’ve got a lot going on with ballet- seriously my mom is on my fucking ass about recitals…”
You realised you were rambling and looked down after briefly pausing “Anyway, you’re seriously great. I’m just not looking for anything serious right now an-”
“Me neither” Jake cut in nonchalantly while nodding diplomatically and taking a sip of his drink
“Yeah, an- wait what?”
“I mean, I’m not looking for anything at the moment either. That night was nice, I had fun” Jake explained while fiddling with the paper wrapper of his straw “And if you haven’t noticed I kinda don’t have a lot going on with me right now” 
You took a moment to register what he just said before deadpanning “Are you trying to use me for sex.” 
“What no!” Jake exclaimed a bit louder than he realised, making a few heads turn “Um, no I’m not. Seriously. I’m not a douche, I’m just…I don’t know how to really- talk. To women at least… I was hoping, well I was told, having casual hookups would fix that. Like, exposure therapy, I guess?” 
This man seriously did not just describe hooking up with you as exposure therapy. 
“You can totally decline! I was just suggesting it because a friend told me to, oh wait fuck you didn’t want anyone to know. Sorry, Jay, Heeseung, and Sunghoon know…I seriously didn’t mean to tell them it just slipped out and- yeah sorry. Uh well, Heeseung suggested it so…” Jake rambled on with his hand absently reaching for the nape of his neck, only to be met with your blank expression, mouth slightly agape, and iced americano in hand. God your face was practically a human adaptation of the Windows error screen. 
“Ummm” you trailed off playing around with the straw in your drink. Well nobody’s ever asked you to be friends with benefits, so your brain was admittedly still buffering. “Don’t you think it’s a little…weird? I mean we’ve known each other since high school, like granted we didn’t talk but- yeah you know? And like I’ve just, never done this before. Like ever.” 
“I mean I haven’t either,” Jake paused to put down his drink “Worth a shot though right?” 
Jesus Christ were you seriously going to be friends with benefits with the physics nerd? You mentally weighed out the pros and cons of his little proposal. It wasn’t like the last time was bad or anything, you just couldn't shake off the image of sixteen-year-old him at the back of the physics classroom playing with the Newton’s cradle while your teacher lectured on about waves. Recalling this you looked up at Jake sitting in front of you right now, he still had the same face but his features matured, his body was more built (probably all the training) and you couldn’t deny that even with him nervously picking at his fingernails…he definitely did grow up well. 
“I’ll-” you said with a slight sigh “I’ll get back to you on it Jake.”
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“You’ll get back to him on it?! What is this a corporate meeting?” Your roommate Zuha said in between handfuls of chips.
Eyes shifting to the side to snap a dirty glare at her, you sighed in frustration before joining her atop your lofted bed. Kazuha and you were complete opposites: she was arguably way more bold than you and had an impressive list of friends spanning across the three different universities that neighboured Decelis. To be honest meeting her when you were six at ballet lessons might have been the sole reason you were able to get through university with a thankfully active social life. Truly you didn’t think your bond over Ever After High dolls would take you so far; but there you were in your second year of university, lounged across your mattress while she berated you for your lacking conversational skills.
“Hey! I was trying to be polite for your information,” you defended whilst burying your head into your pillows 
“I mean why not?” Zuha asked with indifference 
“Oh I don’t know, maybe because we went to high school together, he was and still is a huge dork, and he’s Jake Sim. Yeah just a thought.” you snapped back while digging your hands deeper into Kazuha’s bag of chips
“Well to me those all sound like pros.” she had reached in to grab a fistful of chips before munching on them between sentences, “Plus what’s the big deal, you hooked up once why can’t you do it again” she asked, tugging away the bag from you as it reached near emptiness. 
God you wished it was that easy. You sometimes envied how little she thought of things. 
“Yeah, I guess…” your hands reach for the ends of your hair, twisting them around your fingertips. “Okay but how do I even get back to him on it?” 
“Yeah well your first mistake was responding with that, but like just text him? We’re not living in the fucking 19th century, sms exists.”
“Yeah okay, am I just supposed to send ‘Hi Jake! So after much consideration, I am now getting back to you on it! And yes I would totally love casually fucking you xoxo yn!!’” you replied sarcastically 
“Okay, you know that’s not what I mean. If you’ve got the general premise down, just send it. Not like you’re opposed to it so…” Zuha said handing you your phone with her Calbee chip dust-covered fingers. 
Taking the phone and wiping the grime off, you opened your chat with Jake. Typing and retyping over and over again trying to form the perfect message your finger hovered over the send button while you battled your internal warfare. 
Too immersed in the constant back and forth fogging your mind you failed to stop Zuha from taking the phone from your grasp and sending the message for you.
“KAZUHA NAKAMURA. UNSEND THAT SHIT RIGHT NOW” you frantically cried out ripping the phone from her hands, you scrambled for the unsend button but were disappointingly greeted with a notification at the top of your screen. 
Jake Sim (Hookup)
Cool! So this Friday?
What the hell did you just get yourself into
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Sure enough, Friday came and you found yourself stretched across Jake Sim’s bed dressed in one of his oversized shirts. God, you didn’t think you would be here again. Mindlessly scrolling through Instagram while Jake pulled a grey hoodie over his body before adjusting himself next to you, subtly inviting you to lay your head on his shoulder. (Obviously, you didn’t get the hint)
Putting down your phone to the side, your hands reached to fidget with the seams of his sleeves. 
“Do you-” you were cut off by the embarrassingly loud rumble of your stomach.
“Oh, are you hungry?” Jake glanced down, eyes widened and head slightly cocked to the left. 
“Um, kinda..” you responded, god wasn’t he supposed to be the awkward one. 
“Do you want some ramen?” He said propping himself a bit more before mentally cussing at himself realising the implication of his words “I mean, not in like- that way. Well I guess kinda in that way, we did just-”
“Ramen sounds great!” you quickly cut in before he could finish his sentence, ripping the comforters off your bodies already heading towards the door. 
To your surprise, Jake Sim was a pretty good cook. Well, that was a bit of an exaggeration considering it was just Chapaguri and steak, but hell was that one good bowl of Chapaguri. Spooning the noodles into your mouth, Jake placed a cut of steak onto your plate. Weird. That was, thoughtful. Probably a force of habit you reasoned to yourself. 
“So um can I ask,” you paused to wipe your mouth “Am I seriously the only other girl you’ve slept with, or is you sleeping with only 1 person before me just a rumour?”
Jake’s arm stretched towards the nape of his neck while the other placed another piece of steak onto your plate before answering. “Uh, I mean in college, yeah. I haven’t had much luck seeing too many people. Kinda the reason you’re here” 
“Well I guess that’s not too surprising” 
“Oh yeah?” Jake asked tauntingly leaning back into his chair “What’s that supposed to mean hm?”
“I’m just saying I’m not surprised that the dude who spent his free periods researching Quantum mechanics can’t pull.” you teased back with a sly smile 
“Uh-huh,” he replied putting another piece of food onto your plate “Well I’ll have you know I managed to hook up with at least like- 2 people in high school” 
“Yeah and I don’t do ballet.” you came back snarkily 
“Hey! I can even list them for you if you don’t believe me.” Jake chuckled slightly while adjusting the collar of his hoodie
“Yeah, and I bet it was real hard remembering that list of 2 people” Laughing in response Jake reached for a can of coke before opening it and placing it in front of you.
Again, weird. As you got talking you realised Jake Sim maybe wasn’t as awkward or dorkish as everyone claimed him to be. Okay well partly your fault for believing assumptions and jumping to conclusions, but after the initial nerves wore down he was pretty chill. Which led you to wonder, “Hey why don’t you talk to girls? I mean you’re pretty much a natural at this.” 
“Oh.” Jake replied a bit flattered, “Well, I don’t think I’m a natural, like when I tried to talk with Minyoung after we hooked up it was a mess.” hands now fiddling with the skin at his fingertips, “I guess with you it’s sorta, comfortable?” 
Your actions came to an instant halt, comfortable? You shook it off thinking it was because you guys knew each other beforehand, yeah definitely that. 
“So you did manage to get with one of the gymnastic girls.” you said trying to divert the topic
“Well not really, she kinda ghosted me after that..” Jake answered looking down at the marble countertop
“Why?” 
“Well as you said, I can’t really pull” you giggled in response while still forking down mouthfuls of chapaguri 
“Hey, don’t laugh with your mouth full.” Jake scolded before taking his thumb to wipe the corner of your mouth, an action you once again brushed off to be a force of habit. Still, you couldn’t deny, if you actually did like Jake in that way you would’ve folded instantly.
He smiled slightly and ruffled your hair before taking your empty bowl and beginning to wash it, weird.
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Hooking up with Jake became more natural and common as time went on, it somewhat integrated itself into your routine:
Hook up, go eat, then go about your separate ways. 
Over time you got to know Jake more and more, past his initially dorky interests you learned a few things about him: 
He was a huge dog lover - similarly to you - and had a golden retriever named Layla 
He was surprisingly funny, if he got comfortable with you at least 
Despite being awkward as fuck, he was way more extroverted than you. He just needed to be around one of his friends for that to shine through.
He wasn’t called a star soccer player for nothing, you’d initially never expected scraggly little Jake Sim to win so many medals and trophies in high school. No wonder he got in with a scholarship.
It wasn’t like Jake told you these things outwardly, but you never failed to catch onto how his eyes had a slight glimmer within them when describing his ‘best friend’ who you later found out to be his childhood pet. Or how whenever there was a short silence between you two he took it as an opportunity to crack a small joke. And you knew on a surface level that Jake was a pretty friendly guy, but you just never realised how long his social battery truly lasted; that man had a motor mouth. The soccer thing however was something you always had a slight clue about, in high school most of his lunch breaks and evenings after school would be spent in the field with Jay, Heeseung, and Sunghoon. Back then you assumed he didn’t have anything better to do, so the numerous medals that spanned across the walls of his room were a bit of a shock to you. 
But it’s not like you cared about Jake like that, you were just…observant. 
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Jake was nice, it was fun being his friend but you didn’t go out of your way to try and hang out with Jake in real life. Really, it’s not like you guys were close like that. Neither of you bothered to try and cross that boundary, that was until today at least.
“Hey.” Jake said, smiling as he sat down in front of you. Your eyes faltered from their usual unbothered gaze, your pupils dilating a bit in shock. Hell, there are around 200 other seats in the athlete’s dining hall, yet he had to sit in front of you.
Maybe your pastel pink Lululemon jacket was the drawing point, probably so bright it made you the first person he noticed making him sit with you out of convenience, at least you would like to tell yourself that. “Oh, hi Jake. Uh- don’t you have practice? I mean usually I never see you at the dining hall when I come to eat” You slowly realised how stalker-ish that sounded “not like. I’m tracking your schedule or anything like that. don’t get the wrong idea”
Jake let out a breathy laugh in hopes of breaking the awkward tension surrounding the table (he remained unsuccessful) “Yeah, uh practice got cancelled. So I’m here earlier than expected.”
“Cool cool” you let out nonchalantly. And there you were back to square one, the same awkward tension overwhelming the atmosphere. God how could you be this awkward with a guy you basically had a bi-weekly fuck schedule with. “So uh, you going to Soobin’s party this weekend? the whole soccer team is gonna be there, including me” he said the last part in almost a whisper.
“Oh uh, I haven’t really thought about it. Kazuha is going, so I’ll probably go with” You replied still staring down at your measly plate of japchae, barely touched. “Uh I think I should go study-” you frantically said in an exasperated sigh in hopes to remove herself from any more unwanted conversation starters you would have to pull out of her ass.
“But you haven’t even touched your food?” Jake said clearly not getting the hint. But also he was genuinely worried, I mean yeah typically soccer players and ballerinas' diets are obviously different with their portion sizes, but he still took health very seriously. “I’m not that hungry anyway.” you said slowly getting up to leave
“Wait, do you do this often? skip meals?” Jake asked, his eyes glazed over with a concerned expression, one you hadn’t seen before.
“Oh I mean, most times it's not intentional, I get busy with practice”
“Hold on” Jake muttered before getting up and heading outside. Leaving you haphazardly standing up holding your plate of food. You sat down again poking at the unfinished scraps of carrots, “This man cannot take a hint” you muttered. 
Jake then returned pocky and Pocari sweat in hand. “Uh here, it’s good for electrolytes” he said while handing you the bottle “Oh and, eat this after practice or something, you need carbs and sugar”. Slightly taken aback you slowly took both items in hand, a slight warmth forming in the pits of your stomach. “oh you didn’t really have to-”
“I wanted to.” Jake replied cutting you off, suddenly embarrassed at his boldness he absently reached to the nape of his neck (a habit you noticed he did when he was flustered) “Uh anyways, I’ve gotta go to office hours now. But try not to skip meals, it’s not that good for you, you’re an athlete so..” he trailed off mumbling the last bits to himself, all while looking down to the floor. The weird tension in the air was still there but, somehow it was a little more bearable, well for you at least. “Thanks, uh I’ll pay you back-”
“Don’t bother!” he scrambled to say shooting his head up, pushing your approaching hand back. Fuck that reply was way too quick. “Uh, it’s on me! Don’t worry about it really.” slowly backing away he failed to notice how his legs seemed to trample over each other almost knocking himself down. He (thankfully) regained his balance “Bye YN!”
Blinking in what you think is a mixture of disbelief, amusement, and confusion you managed to mutter out a small “Thank you”
Safe to say that interaction left you both pretty embarrassed.
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Most times you went to Jake's house it usually ended in lighthearted conversations over a plate of food. However, some nights were just spent as the two of you lay in his bed looking up at his ceiling talking about everything and anything; these were the nights you found yourself enjoying the most. Tonight luckily happened to be one of them. 
“Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask,” Jake said before settling down next to you “Have you seriously never had a friend with benefits before?” 
“Hm? Why do you ask?” you said before moving to lay between Jake’s legs, head resting upon his thigh. 
“Ah you know, Just curious” He replied looking down at you with a slight smile. Did his eyes always look that pretty?
“No actually, I wasn’t really one for keeping a casual relationship with one person for a long time. I got bored too quickly, not that I’m bored of you. I did have a lot of hookups though, those were a bit more fun” you replied; a small smile formed across your face while recalling nostalgic high school memories. 
“That’s interesting…” you noticed a slight hesitation lingering in his words. 
“Why d’you sound so confused huh” Gently nudging his thigh you laughed. 
“Nothing nothing! I just, you know, didn’t really expect that from you. I don’t know in high school you were kinda- perfect? Like the captain of the dance team, student council secretary, and straight-A student; not to mention you were practically already on the road to Decelis with a scholarship. I didn’t really expect you to…”
“What, be a whore?” you butted in jokingly 
Jake’s hand reached out to run through your hair, grinning softly before responding “You know that’s not what I meant.” 
Chuckling in response your hands reached to fiddle with the ends of your hair. “Kidding, I get what you mean though. I - well my mom - tried hard to keep up the good girl act. But I was a teenager with the whole house to myself and a huge lack of self-discipline so…yeah”
“Was your mom never really there or…” Jake asked looping your hair around his fingers, shit was that too invasive?
Thankfully you responded whilst twiddling with the hem of your (well his) t-shirt. “Uh, no not really, I guess. Well, she was there, but just always working” Jesus why were you telling him this shit, not like you wanted to it was all just kinda- spilling out. “I mean I don’t hold it against her, it’s literally the reason I got to do ballet and attend this school in the first place”
“But?” Jake asked expectantly. Fuck why was he asking you this shit? Did he seriously think trauma dumping would fill the void of intimacy you two shared? 
“No I mean there isn’t really a but- well there kinda is. I don't know, it gets kinda lonely…only child and all. But I know she did it all for my own good, she knows what's best for me” the last part coming out a bit strained, “I just was kinda on my own for a while I guess… that’s probably why she signed me up for ballet classes when I was younger”
“Oh, she was the one who signed you up?”
“Yeah, she was, actually!” voice slightly perking up as you recalled fond memories of six year old you lacing up your first ballet flats, “When I was younger I loved dancing so ballet kinda came naturally to me I guess, but yeah ballet was really fun” 
“Was?” Jake inquired curiously, his head tilting down to meet his glossy eyes with yours. 
“Oh well, I guess it is still kinda fun- but like as I got better at it there seemed to be more expectations from people. It gets kinda stressful you know” you replied with a slight chuckle, hands picking at the skin on your fingers. “It’s partly my fault for not wanting to practise so much anymore, but sometimes it's hard not to notice every little mistake I make when dancing.”
“Well,” Jake began before taking your hand in his and lacing your fingers together “, I think you’re doing just fine. Trust me I’ve never seen a better dancer than you, like you’re seriously amazing”
You giggled slightly while staring at his hand intertwined with yours. Funny, you didn’t think he’d notice that.
“You sure you’re not lying about the whole bitchless thing? Because this,” you said while gesturing to his hand holding yours “, totally not bitchless behaviour” 
“Hey, I never said I was bitchless! Just no girlfriend you know.” Jake laughed nervously , becoming all too aware of his actions. He slowly lets go of your hand. A slight blush formed across his face before he cleared his throat to ask “So what about you, no boyfriend?” 
“Well, I did have one or two. But as I said, I get bored easily” you answered, still twiddling the hem of your shirt “I dumped both of them, not like there was anything wrong with the relationship- I just kinda have this bad habit of running from things when I notice something just slightly goes wrong. Yeah, it’s stupid really I don’t know why I do it.” Trailing off you slowly became aware that you were crossing the imaginary line you established between you and Jake. Wait, what the fuck were you saying? Why were you telling him this? You didn’t tell anyone this shit. No way Jake Sim, the dude who you were casually hooking up with, was going to be the first person you let in on your issues. Nah, not happening. 
“Um anyway! Maybe I should get going now, you have practice anyways.” you sighed, frantically getting up and grabbing your clothes. 
“Oh uh, yeah sure…” Jake said slightly startled, his hand reaching for the back of his neck and scratching it while he tried to look the other way as you changed in front of him (not like his head was in between your thighs a few seconds ago)
He walked you out to the doorway of his apartment, keeping a somewhat awkward distance between you guys as he waved while watching you walk out. 
“Bye!” he called out delayed, giving you a slight jump. 
“Oh, bye!” you said awkwardly facing him, immediately turning back around to  speed walk down the hallway.
For some reason even though you had already left he couldn’t get rid of this slight buzz in his stomach, his heart racing ever so slightly while he felt his cheeks heat up. Fuck I’m an idiot, Jake sighed to himself.
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“What do you think? Too much?” you asked Kazuha whilst standing in front of her to show off your outfit. You were trying to dress out of your comfort zone by switching up your usual white tank and low-waisted jeans combo to a black tube top paired with a leather miniskirt. 
“You look the same YN.” your roommate replied stoically “And what are you so nervous for anyways? What, is it because Jake is picking you up?” she added between snickers. 
“What no!” you rushed to respond “And might I remind you that the only reason he’s picking me up is because you ditched on me last minute.” 
“Heyyy, I told you I was sorry! But Yunjin won’t be in Korea for much longer and I promised to have a sleepover with her before she leaves!” Kazuha whined in a pout “Promise, next time I get invited to a party you’re number 1 on my waitlist. I swear” 
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m the only one on that waitlist right now.” you muttered before reaching for your phone after noticing a notification popping up on your screen. 
Jake Sim (Hookup)
Hey I’m waiting outside btw! Also, I brought a jacket just in case you were cold but I realised you might bring your own so uh
Jake Sim (Hookup)
don’t bring a jacket lmao
You smiled to yourself slightly after reading that, to which your roommate seemed to catch.
“Oh lover boy here already hm?” she teased in a playful tone. “Ew god don’t call him that.” you deadpanned before heading out the door. 
Now in all honesty you were perfectly fine with going to the party yourself, Soobin’s apartment happened to be a 15-minute walk away from campus and it’s not like the area was relatively unsafe. However, Jake insisted that he pick you up and drop you off, saying something along the lines of it weighing down on his conscience. You can’t say you weren’t thankful to see him jacket in hand and waiting for you in front of the doors to your dorm after you were unpleasantly greeted by the bitter wind blowing in your face. Totally just grateful for the jacket, no other reason. 
The walk there was filled with the usual lighthearted jokes and updates on your days, nothing new. You grew to truly enjoy these moments with just you and him, it somewhat felt like it was just the two of you and time stopped. It was nice, you never had someone to listen to you the way he did. However, the peaceful moment shared between you two vanished the minute you stepped into Soobin’s apartment. For a while you forgot that Jake Sim, though being called a dork by half the campus, was still a frat boy and admittedly pretty popular. So imagine the whiplash you got when he was immediately dragged away by Jay, Yuna, and Soobin before he could even say goodbye to you. Not like you cared though, you had plenty of other friends.
A couple of hours had passed and the ‘other friends’ in question seemed to disappear one by one as the night went on. Which is how you winded up in Soobin’s living room on the couch, beer in hand whilst scrolling through TikTok. That was before you heard someone clear their throat. Looking up you were met with Lee Heeseung standing in front of you, head cocked slightly to the side. 
“Hey YN, mind if I sit?” he didn’t really wait for your response before plopping himself right next to you.
“Oh, hey Heeseung” you muttered, eyes not leaving your phone. You had talked to Heeseung a couple of times before when you went to meet up with Jake, but you wouldn’t really consider yourself besties with the guy who was the sole reason Jake had even offered to hook up with you. 
“What’s up, are you bored? I assume you didn’t come here to scroll TikTok alone.” He joked with a quick chuckle. 
“Yeah well I would leave but Jake insisted on taking me back home so it feels kinda rude to leave without him. And he’s obviously very,” you shot your head up to glare at the sight of Jake chatting it up with Jay, Yuna, and Ryujin. What happened to the whole ‘bad at talking to girls’ thing now huh? You scoffed before completing your sentence with a grimace “Preoccupied.”
Heeseung seemed to catch onto your change of tone as the next thing he said was, “Don’t worry Jake’s normally just chatty like this when he’s got one of us around, he really really can’t talk to girls otherwise. Well, obviously not you though, actually he can’t shut up about you.” 
Your head perked up at Heeseung's comment “What do you mean?” 
“I mean, the guy can’t stop talking about you even when you’re gone. Like telling us about how cool your recitals looked, your favourite foods, what you guys did that day, hell he brings you into practically anything it’s kinda annoying. ‘Oh YN loves that drink’ ‘Oh can you buy one for YN too?’ ‘Hey, this is YN’s favourite song!’ ‘Hey don’t touch that, it's for YN’” Heeseung said in a mocking tone, his hands coming up to mimic small puppets pretending to be Jake.
“Really? You’re probably exaggerating, me and Jake aren’t even that close.” you commented
“Trust me YN, you don’t live with that guy. I feel like I’m even in on your whole friends-with-benefits situation by how much I know about you. Seriously I think he's obsessed-” 
“What’cha guys talking about!” you were too engrossed in your conversation you hadn’t noticed that Jake had left Jay and his friends to come join you. 
You shot a glare at him before tilting your head down at your drink “Oh you know, just keeping myself entertained” you replied before whipping your head up “Since you were obviously, pretty busy.”
Before Jake could defend himself, Soobin drunkenly called out from the kitchen “Hey guys! Who wants to play spin the bottle!” his words slurred as he held up an empty beer can. 
Great, drunk college students and spin the bottle, what could go wrong? 
Hesitantly you and Jake made your way to the circle formed on the floor sitting across from each other while everyone else gathered in.
“Okay, so the rules are: you kiss or you drink. Three shots worth of soju may I mention! Who wants to go first?” Soobin asked gesturing to the bottle
“Oooh me me me!” Yuna replied eagerly before placing the bottle down and spinning it, landing on Jisung. One after the other everyone took turns spinning the bottle whilst the rest of the crowd let out shouts and claps of encouragement. You frankly thought this whole thing was stupid. I mean, spin the bottle? What was this a cheesy highschool movie? The bottle eventually reached Karina, she took it in hand and spun it vigorously.
Karina, god how could you even begin to describe Karina? Yoo Karina was top of her class in rhythmic gymnastics, led the student body org, and not to mention was absolutely drop. dead. gorgeous. You concluded in your mind that anyone who got to kiss that woman would be the luckiest person on earth, but that was before the bottle landed on Jake. 
“Well pucker up loser” Karina said before moving towards Jake to grab his face and press her lips onto his. You tried to cheer and clap with the rest of the group but you couldn’t ignore the dreadful feeling of your heart dropping to the floor. Pulling away from Karina, you couldn’t brush off how Jake’s eyes immediately came into contact with yours causing your pupils to dilate slightly before you shot your head down to the ground. 
Why the hell did you even care this much, wake up YN! It’s Jake, so he kissed another girl, who cares? You guys aren’t even exclusive, pull yourself together! You quickly shook off the awful feeling in the pit of your stomach and joined in with the others chanting “Spin, spin, spin!” as Jake whirled the bottle around with a quick flick of the wrist.
The bottle seemed to spin in slow motion before coming to a reaching its delayed halt and pointing directly at you. Oh fuck. 
You braced yourself for the awkward aftermath of the kiss you were bound to face later tonight, god how were you even supposed to face Jake after this? I mean yeah you guys had sex, but you would argue kissing is far more intimate. Your gaze lingered on jake and you watched how his eyes widened in anticipation, his hand again reaching to the nape of his neck absently while the other grabbed the red solo cup and-
Wait what, Jake was taking the drink?
Let it be known that Jake Sim had an infamous reputation of never drinking at parties, for a while people thought he was heavily religious; until it was revealed by sunghoon that in highschool Jake was unexpectedly a huge party animal and no one could possibly keep him away from a beer. Getting into college, he apparently tried to drop the heavy drinking and decided to take his athlete career more seriously. If you were to take Jake's drink at a party you would find either 1 of 3 things: coke zero, a mixture of random fruit juices from a punch bowl that 80% of the party did not touch, or kombucha (surprising to say the least). Yet there he was, drinking about 3 shots worth of soju all in one go. All to avoid kissing you. great.
A pit formed in your stomach as the loud chants seemed to die down, somehow this made you feel like the world's biggest loser. Was kissing you that bad? Hell he was in between your thighs half the time but he would rather drink than kiss you? Why didn’t he kiss you? Why did you want him to kiss you?
Jake let out a slight groan after downing the drink whole, the circle erupted into laughs and whoas but he could only focus on the one person who hadn’t said anything, the one person who was staring straight at him in what Jake could only assume was a mixture of disbelief and anger. Fuck, this totally did not go to plan. Why was she mad? I mean you didn’t say you were mad, but the look in your eyes somewhat gave it away. Jake thought the last thing you wanted to do was kiss him, I mean this whole time you would preach about how you guys were strictly casual and how you wanted nothing to do with him romantically. Jake thought he would save you the trouble, and partly save himself from the prolonged silences on the walk back to your dorm. It’s not like he didn’t benefit from this too I mean, Jake totally could go without kissing you. It’s not like it was a piece of intimacy your “relationship” lacked, not like it was the one thing he’d been longing for. Yep, totally not. 
You broke the gaze abruptly when you soon realised how long you’d been staring. Fuck did he notice? He definitely did. Your eyes now fixated on the floor while he stared off awkwardly to the side.
“Your turn YN!” Yuna cheerfully said handing her the bottle, her breath reeked of alcohol it was making you dizzy.
“Uh I think I’ll skip, I’ve had enough drinks for tonight” you replied, accompanied by a nervous chuckle. God, why was the room suddenly spinning? “As a matter of fact,” you quickly got up from your position slowly moving away from the circle, “I think I need to use the bathroom, I’ll sit out this round, you guys can continue though”
“Okay!” Yuna responded, obviously she was too wasted to notice the hesitation lingering in your voice.
You quickly stole a glance at the group behind, more so at the man you were sitting across from a minute ago. Lo and behold, Jake was laughing hazily and chanting encouragements with the others as Ryujin and Hyunjin messily made out. His eyes had a shine which was all too familiar to you, his grin was one you recognised countless times before, and to your dismay: he was completely unaffected by the whole situation.
Great, so he couldn’t give less of a fuck. You thought to yourself. Normally this would be a relief to you, I mean you said yourself you wanted something casual, but if that was the case why did you feel so embarrassingly hollow and empty inside?
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You groggily stumbled away from the corner of the room and headed over to the kitchen, maybe a drink would drown out the noises of them chanting “Kiss kiss kiss” Pft, what are they grade schoolers? You snatched a red solo cup and started pouring whatever alcohol was closest in reach, vodka, tequila, soju, beer, you did not give a fuck. You downed the drink whole, slightly gasping for air as you polished it off. Grabbing for another bottle, your hands seemed to meet another. Looking up to see who had a shared interest in… absolut vodka? God you hated that shit, but well right now it seemed tolerable, however you were greeted by the disappointing sight of none other than: Seunghan.
God what was Seunghan doing here, he didn’t even fucking go here. To give some context, Seunghan happened to be your last boyfriend; a senior you used to date who at the time was a huge ego boost to you since you were a year younger. But you inevitably broke up with him before he left for university, even though you promised you would try and make things work long distance. Hell who were you kidding, staying with a highschool senior as a college freshman? Who would want to do that? The last excuse you could spit back at his pathetic face while ending things was “You aren’t even a good fuck” safe to say that bruised his ego a bit.
“Hey YN” he looked at you with an expression you can only make out as: egoistic. You wanted to smack that smug grin off his face, but you weren’t really the one with the upper hand here. I mean who wouldn’t smirk at the sight of their highschool ex absolutely fucking hammered at a college party.
“Hi” you replied coldly, his grip on the alcohol bottle slightly loosened, which you took as an opportunity to snatch out of his hand and pour yourself another drink (probably double of what you were originally planning to pour)
“So,” He paused for a second waiting for you to finish drinking “How's it going, what are you doing here?”
“I kinda go here.” you said in between sips “and shouldn’t I be asking you that, you don’t even go to Decelis.”
“Well someone’s hostile” he let out a chuckle, face still smug “Ah yeah, my friend Soobin, actually invited me. Swim team captain, ring a bell?”
“That's nice Seunghan” your face obviously painted that you didn’t really think so. You started to slowly make your way to the bathroom, not knowing how much longer you could stand being in the same proximity of this asshole.
“Is that it?” Seunghan called out expectantly. What the hell did this man want jesus. You could feel your anger just about boiling over, that and the 4 cups of alcohol in your system just about tipped you over the edge”
“What the hell do you want, Seunghan? An apology? You see me after what 2 years and expect to coax an apology out of me? Yeah not happening. I don’t even know what you’re doing here because clearly last time I checked you didn’t go to Decelis. So yeah, I don’t really know what you want from me but if it's an apology or something, sorry to disappoint.”
“Woah woah, calm down there” Seunghan said, arms up seeming to gesture he meant no harm, the smirk on his face displayed otherwise.
You were ready to spit out another insult at him, maybe add a punch into the mixture, until a pair of hands gently grabbed your shoulder. You whipped your head backwards to see Jake smiling awkwardly at Seunghan and scratching the back of his head nervously. “Sorry about that, she's kinda drunk right now so I think we’ll get going!”
You want to retort back that you aren't, but before doing so Seunghan cuts you off “who are you again.” 
Instead of the smug grin that adorned his face earlier, a weirdly serious expression was now plastered across him. Weird. Was he trying to assert dominance or something? You giggled to yourself a bit at the idea, slowly looking up at Jake to see what his response was. Maybe they would have a standoff, battle it out like in the movies. Instead a grin was still shining on his face, except something was off. His gaze looked harsher, juxtaposing the warm smile on the lower half of his face. Something behind his eyes signalled that he wasn’t going to take any bullshit, funny you thought. You weren't used to seeing this side of Jake, it was an amusing sight to say the least.
“Jake her,” he hesitated for a second “boyfriend. But I don’t think that matters really, I've gotta get YN home now” He quickly grabbed your wrist to lead you away and out the door, seemingly a bit too quick that it had you stumbling over your steps, or maybe that was the alcohol talking.
“Woww, look at that you can actually stick up for yourself! You know that was kinda funny, what were you trying to assert dominance or something? Thanks for saying you were my boyfriend though, god I don’t think he would be able to leave me alone otherwise” you said in between chuckles whilst shutting the door behind you, but jake remained silent. Weird, was he just drunk too? 
It’s not like you weren't used to the silence, hell it’s what took up most of your conversations (well lack of conversation more like). You remained quiet until the both of you got back to your dorm, you were weirdly too intimidated to say anything. Not intimidated by him, god no. More so the situation, you’d been used to the awkward silence, the post sex silences, the comfortable silences, but this was a different silence, one you weren’t really sure how to react towards. Once in your dorm, Jake finally said something to break the tension.
“Who was that guy?” he asked, gaze averted down to the floor and hand absently reaching for the nape of his neck, there he goes again you think. ”Seunghan,” you said while pulling over your tube top to change into an oversized shirt, which you realised was one you stole from Jake a while back “, just some ass I dated in highschool, doesn’t really matter.”
Jake's gaze was still stuck on the dorm carpet, his hand now picking at his cuticles. “Was he bothering you? I mean I couldn’t really tell but you looked uncomfortable, so like…yeah I don’t know”
You chuckled, cute you think. Wait fuck did you really just find what he did cute. Did you just fucking giggle. A flustered blush seems to form across your face whilst thinking of your actions. Get a grip YN it’s jake fucking sim, hes an awkward mess, an awkward mess you’re casually fucking. You can’t be doing this.
“Uh, I mean kinda. I was going to punch him so you probably saved me the collateral. Thanks though, it was nice” you said, tucking away your boots still facing away from him; embarrassed at the thought of you being the least bit flustered over his actions.
“Ah…” Jake trailed off. Fuck what was he meant to say now, well he knew what he wanted to say. He wanted to ask if it was weird that he called himself her boyfriend, but you didn’t seem to care so it would be weird if he brought it up now. I mean, not like he cared. a little white lie to save you some trouble, no biggie.
“Are you down to..” you asked nonchalantly, turning your head around to face him. He adorned his typical lost expression, god he was really clueless.
“You know, fuck.” you assumed it was the alcohol in your system talking, you were clearly very tipsy, that plus your pent up frustration from tonight was the perfect mixture for a good hookup. Or maybe you were just plain old horny, probably the case you thought to yourself. Definitely wasn’t the way Jake's hair was a perfect fluffy mess, or how his face seemed to have a slight glow to it (probably the drinks), or his eyes that were weirdly more iridescent than usual, yeah totally not that.
Jake's eyes widened a bit, taken aback by the request but definitely not surprised. “YN you’re drunk,” he said with a sigh, grabbing your shoulders and sitting you down on the edge of your mattress, “I'd love to but, maybe next time?” he said with a gentle grin, his dimples slightly poking out.
fuck was he leaving already? Before he could go any further you quickly grabbed his wrist. Jake, startled, looked back at you like a deer in headlights. Only to be met with an equally as shocked gaze, shit all this alcohol was making your body move before you could even think.
“Uh, can you just…” you wince a bit at the thought of what would come out next, “stay. Just until I fall asleep, I feel kinda…lonely?” The end came out in a mumble as your eyes laid fixated on the floor. A blush formed across Jake's face, but he quickly snapped himself out of whatever haze he was in. She’s drunk jake. It doesn't mean anything.
He plastered on the gentle grin that adorned his face earlier, smiling at her with endearment. “Alright, uhm just scoot over a bit”
Moving awkwardly to the side to make room for Jake on the bed he shortly joined you, adjusting himself next to you moving your head to atop his arm while the other pulled you in closer allowing him to rest his chin on top of your hair. Everything about this moment felt much too intimate to be shared between two people who were just casually fucking. You could feel your heartbeat slightly quicken and your breath hitching in your throat. However as time passed on you began to feel yourself slowly relax into Jake’s touch, allowing yourself to enjoy the feeling of his hand combing through your hair whilst the other reached to trace circles along the small of your back. His warmth next to you felt all too natural, like this was meant to be. Like you weren’t just two strangers who decided to hook up, like you two were everything and more.
“Sometimes I wish this was real” you sighed out, clearly letting the liquor in your system do the talking
“Don’t know how hammered you got but you’re definitely not dreaming right now YN.” Jake said in a low chuckle. Fuck you could listen to his laugh for ages. 
“Not this, I mean us.” 
“Oh.” Jake could feel his body go stiff as heat rushed up to his cheeks. He knew you were drunk, but some part of him hoped this was sober you. 
“You’re too sweet for me sometimes you know? Makes me wish you weren’t my friend and my boyfriend instead, then again don’t think I’m ready for that either. Well sometimes you make me feel like I’m ready, I don’t know, it's weird. Being with you feels so…natural? Like I’ve known you since we were kids- I guess we kinda have known each other for a while, makes me regret not talking to you enough in highschool. You were always pretty cute despite being a dork” rambling on you nuzzled your head closer to his chest. Fuck Jake was practically begging you couldn’t hear the intense racing of his heart. 
“How much did you drink YN?” he stuttered out
“Oh you know, just enough to make me forget everything about that party. Stupid Seunghan ruined my night. You know when you called yourself my boyfriend, yeah I really liked that, some part of me hoped you meant it. I guess I like you a little more than I expected, super stupid right…” you said trailing off as you fell further into your slumber; words slurred as a mixture of drunkenness and exhaustion took over your body.
“You like me?” Jake asked stunned, after garnering no response he tilted his head down slightly to face you. Your face looked so peaceful sleeping he didn’t have the heart to wake you up. How cute, he thought to himself.
“Goodnight YN.” he whispered before pulling you closer to him and dozing off himself. 
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As the sun rose, beams of light made its way through the curtains to shine brightly on your face rudely waking you up. You slowly opened your heavy eyelids before stretching out your arms, only to be met with the shocking sight of Jake passed out next to you. 
Jolting up immediately, you had to do a double take to make sure you weren’t seeing things. Unfortunately this wasn’t a dream and you really did wake up next to Jake Sim, this being the second time you’ve done this with no recollection of what happened the night before. Frantically you tried to recall all the events that happened after Seunghan approached you; slowly but surely everything from last night rushed back to you in an instant, including your drunken confession to Jake. 
Fuck fuck fuck FUCK. What the hell was your issue? Why would you say all that? Jesus you seriously needed to stop drinking, you always ended up in Jake’s bed hungover. God could he have remembered anything that happened last night, he couldn't have right? He was probably drunk too, fuck you hoped he was drunk. 
“YN, you’re up already?” Jake said as his hand groggily rubbed his eyes, the other reaching over to your wrist. 
“Oh uh yeah!” you replied, face flushed with embarrassment before you quickly snapped your hand away from his touch “Hey this is weird but did I happen to say anything weird last night, I was like really drunk.” You winced expecting him to answer with a harsh reminder of your drunken words but instead he only uttered a small “Nope, not anything out of the ordinary”
Sighing in relief you let out a small thank god before getting up to go get dressed, Jake shortly following you like a lost puppy. Still yawning out and half asleep he groaned out a small “Hey, what time is it, by the way?” 
“Oh um,” you quickly grabbed your phone to check “9:30.”
Jakes seemed to immediately wake up, shouting “Oh fuck, I’m late!” He quickly grabbed his belongings before rushing out the door, before haphazardly rushing back in quickly to tell you “Uhm if you need Tylenol let me know I’ll go pick it up for you, bye YN gotta go!” 
Despite being in a rush, Jake was always so attentive towards you, something you were always grateful for; another habit you grew to love about him. 
“He's so sweet” you whispered under your breath to yourself before snapping your head up to face yourself in the mirror. Splashing water on yourself you pointed at your reflection before reminding yourself how badly this would end if you kept going on with this little crush. 
You do not like Jake Sim. You will not like Jake Sim. 
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Days passed and after that night it was safe to say things got pretty awkward between you and Jake. You were in desperate hopes of avoiding him any chance you got, that of course was a lost cause as you guys still were hooking up every other week. However, you made it your mission to not interact with him outside of his apartment, not in classes, not in the gym, not at parties, nowhere. This seemed to be your brain's deluded way of trying to help you get over your crush on him. 
Jake on the other hand had a sense of why you were avoiding him, the whole drunken confession probably didn’t sit right with you. Jake didn’t really want to push it and force his way into your life if you weren’t comfortable, even though he desperately missed the days you spent every second together like best friends, he knew he wasn’t in a position to be complaining. But as time went on your missing presence began to eat away at Jake’s mind, he couldn’t take it anymore. 
Which is how he ended up rushing to move seats over to sit next to you when you entered the chemistry classroom. 
“Hey YN.”
“Oh, Jake hi…”
“You ready for today’s presentation?” he asked after noticing you diligently reading over your flashcards.
“Oh god no, I’m cooked.” you replied with a nervous laugh. 
“Don’t worry I’m sure you’ll do great, you always do.” Jake reassured with a warm smile. How did he always manage to say the right things? 
You flashed him a quick smile before whispering “Thank you.”
Sure enough a few minutes later you found yourself in front of the three hundred students in that lecture room trying not to stumble over your words as you presented about Electrochemistry. Everything was going fine at first, not to toot your own horn but you were pretty much guaranteed an easy A for this project. That was all until it came crumbling down. You stopped dead in your tracks as you felt a familiar warm feeling gathering between your thighs. Fuck, did you just get your period? 
“And u-uh, as I was saying…” you tried to continue the presentation and ignore the fact that your period was looming over you like the grim reaper, threatening to drip down your legs and publicly embarrass yourself in front of the whole class. 
The easy A you were so sure about now seemed out of reach as a lump formed in your throat while you stuttered with tears threatening to spill over your eyes. Quickly finishing up your half assed paragraph on Faraday’s law you bolted out the classroom the moment you were excused back to your seat. 
Rushing down the hall into the bathroom to clean yourself up, you were frustratingly met with the sight of blood stained jeans. Trying to pull down your shirt to hastily cover up the stain was no use, god out of all days to not bring an extra pad. Why did it have to be today? 
Sighing in agony you decided it would be a good idea to just head home instead of returning to class, hell you’d embarrassed yourself enough after that how could you even walk back into the lecture hall after that mess? 
Leaving the backroom with your head down and hand searching your bag hoping a spare pad would manage to appear out of thin air, you failed to notice Jake standing right in front of you (well that was until you bumped into him).
“YN, you okay?” his eyes graced with concern, oh so he’s still attentive as ever it seems. “Was it your presentation? I thought it was great-”
“I got my period.” you blurt out in a rush at the same time, eyes still stuck on the ground as you didn’t have the guts to face him right now “and like, yeah it's a mess so…I kinda just want to get home and change.” you finished with a frustrated sigh. 
“Ah I see” Jake replied before looking down to notice the dark patch on your jeans. 
Before you could go any further he wordlessly stripped off his hoodie before wrapping it around your waist. No words were spoken between you two but the tension arguably spoke much louder than words ever could. 
“I’ll come get it back later okay? Don’t worry about it” he said before knotting it a final time around your waist to secure it in place. 
“Oh, thank you Jake…” you mumbled 
“Hey YN.” he started, making you finally whip your head up to meet his eyes. His face detailed with hesitation, mouth slightly agape, eyes glossed over with doubt and hand again reaching for the nape of his neck nervously, “um, sorry it’s nothing actually- just uh, don’t be a stranger you know?” he continued with a slight shrug. So he did notice you distancing yourself. 
“Oh,” you stuttered, not really sure of what to reply with “alright…”
And with that you made your way back to the dorm, uncertainty lingering in the air around you following its way back to your dorm. Sprawling across your mattress you stared up at the ceiling lost in thought. This wasn’t going to end well. 
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“YN you keep doing this!” your dance teacher snapped before banging a ruler on the metal bar in front of her. You flinched slightly as the loud bang rang through your ears before going to pause the music. 
“How many times do I have to remind you?” she let out in an exasperated sigh, fingers reaching up to pinch the bridge of her nose, “your legs aren’t straight and your feet aren’t pointed either! These are basic things even beginners could get, I expect more from you! What would your mother think, hm? She invested all this money in you just for you to fall short of your abilities. You’re my top student, you cannot be performing like this when the recital is just a few months away! Pull yourself together before I choose another person to take your place, lesson dismissed.” she bellowed out before storming out the classroom. Leaving you collapsed on the ground, face flushed with disappointment as you stared at your dishevelled reflection in the mirror. 
Fuck she was right, what were you doing? You should be better than this, why weren’t you improving? God your mom spent so much time and money on this and you were just letting her down, you couldn’t do anything right. You were becoming a bigger failure than you realised and you didn’t know how to stop it. How were you meant to be the perfect ballerina when you didn’t even know how to be the perfect daughter? You knew you were better than this but why couldn’t you live up to it. Why did you keep messing up?
Slowly tears began pouring out your eyes before the practice room was practically engulfed in your sobs. You however stopped your crying when you noticed the door crack open. 
“YN?” Jake murmured out with a worried look painted across his face, “what happened, what’s wrong?” he asked while rushing over to your side. 
“Oh Jake, god please don’t look I’m a mess right now” quickly you tried to wipe your tears and nervously laugh before Jake stopped you and took your hands in his. 
“YN, honestly I couldn’t care less about how you look right now. What’s wrong? Why are you crying hm?” His face had the same serious gaze from the party when he confronted Seunghan, “It’s okay, you can tell me.”
Hearing that you finally broke down sobbing as he pulled you in closer to his chest, hand running through your hair while whispering small words of comfort. “Jake I can’t do this anymore, I keep messing up in everything I do! I don’t know why I can’t just be the person everyone wants me to be, I’m a failure.” you cried out between sobs.
“Hey hey don’t say that, look at me.” he gently took your face in his hands before tilting it up to meet his gaze, “Okay so maybe you’re not the person everyone wants you to be, and hey maybe you aren’t perfect-”
“Not helping.” you deadpanned 
“Yeah well, I wasn’t done. Point is you’re not that but, you're YN. You’re exactly who you need to be right now, and you’re doing your best. Maybe that isn’t perfect but hey nobody’s perfect, you just keep such high standards for yourself you can never get a chance to breathe. It’s okay to make a few mistakes here and there, we all do, we’re only human. If it means anything, in my eyes you’re doing everything right. You’re perfect, okay YN?” 
This only made you sob harder into his chest. Jake wasn’t complaining though, he only brought you closer and tightened his grip around you. Hands still running through your hair to lull you back into a relaxed state. 
After finally calming down you wiped the remnants of tears on your face before loosening yourself from Jake’s embrace. Awkwardly laughing before asking “Uhm, why did you come here in the first place again?”
“Oh right that. I needed to get my hoodie back and Zuha said you’d be here, didn’t really expect to see you crying all alone though” he commented with a quick chuckle 
“Oh shit yeah,” you said before reaching over to your bag to try and find his hoodie, Jake however grabbed your wrist to stop you, “Never mind that okay YN? You had a pretty rough day, let’s just get you back to your dorm alright?” 
“But your hoodie-”
“And up we go!” he exclaimed before lifting you up by the arms and pushing you to get out of that practice room. 
The walk back to your dorm was filled with Jake endlessly checking up on you, asking “Are you sure you’re okay” every five minutes. You reassured him time after time that you seriously were fine before finally losing patience and snapping “Jake Sim. If you don’t stop, I will actually not be okay.” 
“Okay okay! Just checking!” he said before whipping his arms up to feign in defeat. 
Reaching your dorm, you awkwardly stood at the doorway waiting for Jake to leave and bid you goodbye but instead he just sorta awkwardly stood there staring at you.
“Yes?”
“Oh um just- call me? If you ever need someone to talk to, you know?”
“Thanks Jake, but I’m not really looking to make my friend my pseudo therapist right now.” you joked. 
“I know I know, just reminding you. You’ve got me, ‘kay?” Jesus, you could never get over how warm his smile made you feel. 
“Alright, thanks Jake” You sighed out before slowly closing your door. After shutting it you immediately dropped to the floor, head buried into your knees. You hated this. You hated how without fail, no matter how long you avoided him, Jake Sim always managed to make butterflies spawn in your stomach and your heart to beat out of your chest. He always knew the right things to say and how to make you feel like the world stopped and purely revolved around the two of you. You hated how badly you’ve fallen for Jake Sim.
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To give some preface, the only times Jake and you had kissed were: 
The first time you’d two ever hooked up when you were drunk out of your mind and too blacked out to remember a thing
The second time you’d hooked up; which technically wasn’t even a kiss because you stopped him as his lips ghosted over yours, almost connecting. You argued that it would be weird for you two to kiss since you only agreed on hooking up with each other, which you added did not involve kissing. 
You two mutually agreed that your relationship would involve no kissing between the two of you. This however did not stop the fact that Jake refusing to kiss you at the party bugged you more than it should have, leading you to blurt out on a random Wednesday afternoon: 
“You didn’t kiss me.”
Jake stopped midway through unbuckling his belt. “What?”
“I mean, at Soobin’s party, you didn’t do it” your eyes glued down to the bed sheets while your hands came up to fiddle with the ends of your hair “I mean you kissed Karina, why not me?”
“I mean…I can kiss you now if you want?”
“Yeah but then you’d only be kissing me because I asked you to do it.” you grunted out in annoyance “But when you were told to kiss me in front of others you didn’t, but you could kiss Karina so easily”
“I thought you didn’t want me to kiss you?” Jake countered, his tone becoming more argumentative. 
“When did I ever say that?” you tried to say nonchalantly, but instead your words spat out like an accusation. Fuck what were you doing? 
“Yeah okay well, kissing her meant nothing” Jake said in a bit of an exasperated sigh, his brows slightly furrowing together. Well Jake knew it wasn’t just that, but hell who was he to bring that up right now
“Yeah well, we’ve been fucking for 6 months, not like that means anything” For some reason this stung a bit for Jake, god he hated that it did.
“YN why does it matter.” he retorted back, the question coming out sharper than he intended
“Technically I’m saying it doesn't.” you let out a slightly stifled breathy laugh in an attempt to break the tension, obviously it doesn’t work “What do you not want to kiss me or something?”
No. God no it was the complete opposite. That was practically the only thing he’d thought about for the past month. But Jake couldn’t admit this now, first off to save him from looking like some desperate loser, and second: you just went on to elaborate on how kissing him meant virtually nothing to you. That them kissing was nothing. Jesus, how could he tell you only now that to him, it was something.
The silence filling the room meant one of the two things you concluded: Jake was either mustering up the courage to give you the best kiss of your life or he did not want to be anywhere near your lips. You opted for the latter.
“I’ll take that as a no.”, you swiftly got up from your previous straddled position to grab your designated ‘walk of shame’ hoodie and collect your things. Clearly, this wasn’t going anywhere. “It's fine Jake really. Just forget I ever asked. It was stupid, and uh, I’ve got practice so I think i’ll get going” you said absently while touching up your makeup
Jake hastily buckled his jeans back up and pulled his grey crewneck over his head. But you were practically out the door before he could finish. “Wait, YN…” he called out stumbling behind you trying to catch up
“Jake, seriously just drop it. It was stupid okay. And I’ve actually got a lot of stretching to do today, so I’ve gotta get going.” You attempted to make the end sound cheery and like you totally didn’t have a lump forming in the depth of your throat. To your dismay, emotions ended up getting the better of you and the words left your tongue stung with bitterness.
“YN I’m sor-” he attempted to stutter out, but you were obviously not hearing him through. “Bye Jake.” 
God, she couldn’t even look at me when leaving.
“Bye.” Jake let out defeatedly, only to be met with the slam of a door in his face.
“fuck…” you both thought.
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“YN come on you’ve been cooped up in the dorm for weeks! Let’s go out tonight, I doubt Jake will even be at the party. Besides you were on my ass about not going with you last time, now the invitation is practically handed to you on a silver platter and you don’t even accept it?!” Zuha said as she rolled next to your curled up body that laid like a corpse on your bed. She was right though, you spent the next few weeks skipping all your classes and only going out to eat and go to practice that the colour from your face was practically drained. You looked like a total zombie to put it lightly. 
“Yeah I won’t, I’m not in the mood to go out tonight” 
“You’re never in the mood! Come on, what good is it to stay stuck in your room pitying yourself while bingeing K-dramas? That’s never gonna help you get over it, a couple of drinks is what you need!” you partly blamed Kazuha for your excessive drinking, she always managed to help you get out of a heartbreak by getting you blackout drunk. 
“Ugh Zuha, who's even going to be at this party anyways? Isn’t it the same old people?” you argued before pulling the covers over your head in hopes it would magically make you disappear from sight. 
“No actually it’s not, a couple of people from SM are hosting. You know, the uni Minjeong goes to? I heard SM parties are like, next level. And besides you can meet some new people, don’t you think that’s the perfect way to help you get over this loser?”
“Hey, he isn’t a loser!”, you quickly argued, springing up from your previously snuggled position, “just like- yeah anyways not the point. I guess, maybe…it would help?”
Before you could even finish your thought Zuha immediately pulled you up and sprung into action. “Okay, perfect. Here, wear this.” she said before tossing pieces of clothing at your face. 
Holding them up you weren’t even sure if she gave you a proper shirt, it was way more revealing than you were used to. “Did you cut this shirt up or something?”
“No, I didn’t you prude. And besides, don't you wanna look cute? Those SM guys won’t know what’s hit them. Trust me.” she said while absently applying lip gloss. 
Hesitantly you wiggled into the outfit before checking yourself out in the mirror. No matter how hard you tried you couldn’t even convince yourself that you felt confident. Maybe some makeup would help. Propping yourself on the bathroom counter you began to cake on layers of foundation, blush, and eyeshadow. Finishing it off with a muted pink lip. 
This is good, you’re fine! You’re going to have fun tonight. You muttered under your breath, repeating it like a mantra. God you hoped you could have fun tonight. 
Entering the apartment you were immediately hit with a wave of loud music blaring through your ears, god you couldn’t even hear what Zuha was saying right next to you. She was right, SM parties are next level. You could see a couple people gathered round a table playing beer pong, seeing Minjeong and a few other familiar faces. You decided to join them, and despite being the worst one there you had to admit it was really fun. Now that a few drinks were in your system you seemed to loosen up, completely forgetting about the worries that had plagued your mind this morning. You grabbed a drink and made your way over to the kitchen where you spotted Zuha and Heeseung talking. Hold on, Heeseung? If he’s here then… 
You scanned the apartment, eyes wandering to the living room where numerous people seemed to be chatting away enthusiastically. Moving further into the area your eyes darted across each face trying to spot your target, and that was when you saw him. There he was, red solo cup in hand, looking directly at you. 
Shit, you were gonna kill Zuha, what was Jake doing here? You scrambled to try and get away from him after making eye contact, but before you could slip away you felt a hand grab your wrist. God damn it. 
“YN, can we talk?” Jake begged with pleading eyes, fuck you’d never seen him this desperate, “please.” 
You nodded your head slightly before he dragged you to an empty room.
“Okay you said you wanted to talk, so talk.” you demanded, still slightly buzzed. Your confidence fueled with alcohol and sheer pettiness
“Listen,” Jake said before pausing to collect his thoughts, “I’m sorry for, well yeah all of it. I shouldn’t have kissed Karina that night, it’s just we aren’t exclusive or anything so I figured-” 
“Yeah we weren’t, but honestly Jake I couldn’t give less of a fuck” a bold-faced lie. Jake scoffed, he was trying to patch things up and you were seriously giving him this attitude? 
“Yeah sure sounds like it” 
“Yeah I don’t, I just think it’s messed up that you don’t kiss me and then proceed to call yourself my boyfriend” 
“Please, that was because Seunghan was bothering you! What was I supposed to do just let a creep keep harassing you? Do you even remember what happened that night YN?” 
“No and as I said I couldn’t give a fuck” 
“Well, I do. You can’t just tell me you like me and pretend it was nothing” fuck so he did remember
“Okay well,” You stuttered out, anger simmering within you “I was drunk. I wasn’t in my right mind that night, so yeah it was nothing. Why does it even matter if I like you or not, you said from the start that what we had was casual.” 
God were you serious right now? Jake could feel his heart hurt a little and his previously confident stance faltering, “Yeah well we obviously haven’t been acting very ‘casual’ as of late.” 
“Why does that even fucking matter Jake, I don’t know why you care so much!” 
“Obviously because I fucking caught feelings!” Jake’s mouth seemed to work faster than his mind. Shit did he seriously just admit that. 
Everything stopped, and your gaze softened for a split second. What. He likes me? He likes me. Fuck, why would you even say all that shit in the first place? You couldn’t even sustain a casual relationship how the fuck were you meant to maintain a real one? This is stupid.
“This is stupid.” you blurt out finally “I can’t handle a relationship right now Jake, hell I couldn’t even handle a casual one. No way we could ever be a real thing.” 
“I thought you liked me.” Jake muttered
“So what if I do Jake? Look at us right now, I can’t even confess to you without running away from it. I’m not good for you Jake. I wouldn’t be able to make us work and-”
“Are you not even willing to try!?” Jake interrupted, tears slowly brimming in his eyes. Fuck, you couldn’t bear seeing him cry.
“Not if I’ll just hurt you in the process!” you shouted meeting his glossy eyes with your own “I’m sorry Jake.” And with that, you stormed past him out the room, out the door, down the stairs, and booked it back to your dorm.
Much like the first time you met, Jake Sim stood there watching you run out on him, again. Fuck.
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Ice cream, americanos, and 2521.
This was how you would spend your days now that you and Jake were officially over. Well it’s not like you didn’t hangout with your other friends as well, you tried really, but even with them you couldn’t get rid of the sickeningly hollow feeling that brewed in the pit of your stomach. You felt much more content alone in your dorm room accompanied by Nam Joo Hyuk and Kim Tae Ri. Or maybe you were just trying to ignore the empty feeling in your chest for as long as you could before heading to sleep. Whether it be escapism or satisfaction, you’d become accustomed to your new little routine. That was until one fateful Saturday afternoon. 
You begrudgingly got up from your comfortable position after hearing a couple of knocks on your dorm room door. Hair a mess and wearing a 2 week old set of pyjamas, you honestly couldn’t care less who was at your door. Expecting to see Kazuha you unlocked it without thinking too much, however you were only greeted with Park Jongseong staring straight at you. 
“Oh Jay! Hey,” you exclaimed suddenly, becoming all too aware of your unkempt appearance. “What are you doing here? Were you looking for Kazuha or something because she just left for practice an-”
“Actually I’m here for you.” Jay cut in, “Could I come in?” his lips pressed together in a thin line and his hands were tucked away in his pockets.
“Oh, um” taken aback slightly by the question you stumbled over your words as he watched you expectantly “...yeah yeah sure, it’s sorta a mess though.” you admitted before moving aside to let him in. 
“So, what’s up?” you exhaled before returning to your position leaning back on your headboard
“Have you um, talked to Jake at all recently?” 
And there it was. Fuck you knew he would ask about Jake. “No, actually.” “Ah yeah, I figured.” his eyes still awkwardly scanning the room “He’s been kinda out of it too, not really going to out with us anymo-”
“If you’re just here to tell me about how badly I hurt him, you can save it.”
“Wait wait no I wasn’t! Just, okay- hear me out” he reasoned before grabbing a chair to sit in front of you 
“I know you guys had that whole argument before. And I don’t blame you, I probably would've been pissed too. But as I said, Jake is an absolute mess. And in no way am I here to make you feel bad for him, or anything! Just like- YN I’ll be straight with you. Jake has never liked a girl this much. Like, ever.”
Feeling your heartbeat flutter more ever so slightly, you glanced up to make eye contact with Jay. “Ah…”
“Yeah and, considering the fact I had to basically nurse him through his first breakup in highschool where he claimed his life was over. I think I’m a pretty reliable source right now. Point is, Jake was like head over heels over you. Still is. Despite being really tired from practice he would always try and run to the convenience store to stock up on your favourite foods. And even before you guys started this whole thing, the day you ran out of his dorm room, I swear that man was an inconsolable mess. Every moment not spent with you, he spent with us talking about how much fun he had with you.” he paused briefly to let you soak in all the things he had just admitted
“And I know I don’t know you as well as he does, nor am I close with you like, at all. But from the look in your eyes you had whenever you were with him, I think you liked him a lot too. And just saying, I don’t think Jake is totally opposed to the idea of you guys dating even after that whole incident at the party. He’s still willing to try…” he trailed off before getting up from his previously sat position, “He’s playing in tonight’s game so, think about it?” he concluded with a slight shrug
Quite honestly you were at a loss for words here, I mean you knew Jake liked you but you didn’t truly know the extent of it. You were obviously still scared about meeting Jake again but a small part of you had hope he was still as forgiving as Jay claimed.
“Thanks Jay, I’ll see.”
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This was a bad idea. 
You couldn’t believe Jay Park had convinced you to dress up all pretty just to sit through an insufferable game of soccer where you had no idea what was going on. Well, he didn’t really tell you to do all that, but you reasoned to yourself passing the blame would probably make you feel better about the fact that this was how you were spending your Saturday night. 
Legs crossed over each other and eyes shooting across the field, you couldn’t really make out anything that was happening. Despite going to a university for sports you sadly had no interest in anything that involved throwing, kicking, or hitting balls around a large empty space. 
You were internally debating whether any of this was worth it in the first place, the game was almost over there was so there was really no harm in leaving now anyways. That was until your eyes locked with an awfully familiar face. There he was, clad in a navy blue jersey, sweat making his skin glisten and a few strands of hair stick to his forehead, running across the field chasing after the ball. And just like that, you felt like you fell for Jake Sim all over again. 
You could deny that even if you had no interest in the sport, Jake made it look infinitely exhilarating. Suddenly drawn in you found yourself at the edge of your seat the entirety of the last half of the game, cheering and clapping whenever Decelis scored a point. It was the final few minutes and Decelis and SM were neck and neck, both scoring a total of 10 points each. 
The ball spiralled across the field before landing in front of Jake. Steps fueled with determination he dribbled the ball further and further across the court with speed and intensity you’ve never witnessed before. Fire blazing with every step he took, he skillfully planted his foot on the ball before striking it in the opposing team's goal post. 
“And a score from Jake Sim! Ladies and gentlemen with only 20 seconds remaining of the game we may have our winners!” The commentator's voice echoed across the stadium, the crowd erupting into shouts and cheers. 
After what seemed like an eternity, the referee finally blew the whistle to announce the end of the second half, crowning Decelis the official winners of this match. The team rushed towards Jake before engulfing him in hugs and showering him with compliments. Jake let out a wide grin in response, his smile beaming brightly across the field. You missed seeing that side of him.
Making your way down the stadium steps, you rushed over to the field in hopes to catch him before his team swept him away. Unfortunately, around 20 other people seemed to have the same idea as you. Being drowned out by the crowd gathered around Jake Sim you somewhat lost hope in any chances of you speaking to him tonight. It’s fine, right? You had plenty of other chances to talk to Jake. However, whether it be fate working in mysterious ways or the glint of your silver hair clip, Jake's eyes caught sight of someone tucked away behind the crowd. 
Recognising you instantly, his heart began to palpitate ever so quickly and the confidence he adorned earlier vanished in an instant. Not wanting to ignore the other people surrounding him he mouthed a quick “Wait” before politely finishing up his conversation with the rest of his team. 
Pushing slightly through the slowly diminishing crowd Jake made his way towards you and tried to ignore the way his hands instantly became clammy while his heart was beating out his chest. Mustering every bit of courage he had left of him he let out a strained “Hey YN.”
“Hi Jake,” you started awkwardly, “Could we um, talk for a bit?”
“Yeah sure but-” he reached to the nape of his neck beginning to look around, “maybe not here? We could go back to my apartment if you want, the guys are going to the afterparty and I’m not really interested.”
“Oh uh,” your heart jumped a bit at his sudden request but after calming yourself down you responded, “yeah, sure. That sounds good.”
The walk back to his place was admittedly one of your more awkward ones, silence filling the atmosphere as you two were both obviously too scared to start any conversation before reaching his apartment. Said silence remained as you made your way into his building, following him around while your eyes layed fixed to the floor. 
Clearing his throat as he shut the door, he decided he should be the one to break the awkward tension between you two. “You wanted to talk to me about something?” 
“Oh right. Um about the other night, I’m really sorry I just…” all the lines you had practised earlier in the shower now had completely slipped your mind, leaving you to run short of things to say, standing there after an uncomfortably long pause. 
“YN it’s fine, I totally understand you not wanting anything between us anymore I get it really-”
“NO THAT’S NOT IT!” hands reaching up in front of your chest before you noticed how disastrously frantic you sounded, “What I was going to say was-” you started before letting out a deep breath. God you really had to get a hold of your nerves.
“What I wanted to say was, well what I’ve been planning to say- is that I was wrong. And I’m sorry for saying all that shit that night, I was scared shitless if I’m gonna be honest. Also admittedly, really buzzed. That obviously doesn’t really make up for it, but, yeah. Anyways– I’m getting side tracked.” you mumbled before shaking your head to snap yourself back into it.
“I told you before, but I have a very big problem with running away from anything that doesn’t have a solid 100% success rate. And relationships kinda are a big part of that? I think I’m seriously out of my mind for saying this, and hell all of this seems incredibly crazy to me. But I just…have to get it out. I’m willing to bet on, maybe not a 100% percent success rate for you Jake. I don’t care if it’s 10, 20, 30 or in the negatives. I’m willing to take that risk for you Jake.”
One beat passed, then two, then another. You stood there in agony waiting for Jake to respond with anything. A yes, a no, a laugh in your face, god you just wanted him to speak. 
“Please say something” you winced. 
“Sorry I’m just- I just- well I’ve never really had anyone ask me out before? So, I kinda am at a loss for words right now, you know?” Jake paused to look up at your hopelessly distraught image, “You are asking me out… right?”
“Yes…I think so and I’ve truthfully never done this either.” you replied sheepishly, eyes still stuck on the hardwood flooring. 
“Well YN,” his hand reached for your chin to lift your head upwards so you were eye level with him, “I would love to go out with you.” he said with a gentle smile. The same smile that had you weak in the knees everytime. 
“Oh thank fuck.” you sighed out in relief. Jake couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of all tension leaving your body. He moved his body closer to you to corner you against the kitchen countertop before moving in to whisper, “Can I do this now?”
“Do what?”
“This.” and with that he slowly closed the distance between you two to press his lips gently on top of yours before his hand reached over to cup the back of your head. It took a moment for you to register what he was fully doing, but as if he had full control over your body you melted into the kiss like butter. Lips moving feverishly against his, your hands reached over to grab his arm and pull him even closer towards you. There was barely breathing room between the two of you, your bodies moving perfectly in sync. Sighing into the kiss as his mouth parted against yours; you swore you weren’t religious but if this was what heaven felt like, you were willing to rethink your choices. 
Slowly parting from him, his lips seemed to still chase after yours as if it was attached to your mouth with a string. You let out a small giggle, redirecting your gaze at his eyes. They were glistening with a warmth you’d seen countless times before, except this time you truly knew it was meant for you. You moved your arms over to loop around his neck whilst cocking your head to the side in amusement. 
“Guess people can’t call you a loser now?” 
“You know damn well I never was,” he chuckled out, tone still low and hushed, “C’mere” he exhaled before kissing you again with even more passion and intensity than before. You smiled into the kiss allowing him to manipulate your body like butter. 
Who knew the physics nerd had it in him huh?
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thoughts frm yuya 💭 hai everyone! omg this is finally out 😭 i think i grinded this fic out in like a week so i do apologize if it's bad 🙏 anyways i hope you guys enjoy it since it's my first really long fic ^^ i said this before but i'll prob go on a short hiatus since i've got my finals coming up, maybe coming back by the end of may or middle of june? nonetheless I will still try and be active on here, just no posting or new works, but i might try to queue some works up so TT hope you guys enjoyed the fic >< feedback and reblogs appreciated !
taglist ─── ⋆ @yerisrev, @nwjws, @jlheon, @k1ttylvr @iiaweirdo @mokangelic @jvjsssnaa @ms-no1kpopstan @caeqey @saursoob @shinrjj @m3chigo @eneiyri @shnnzsworld @heelariously @felixslove @vixensss @laurradoesloveu @atrirose @anormieee @jaklvbub @leep0ems @river-demon-slayer @minniejenseo @thing89 @ineedsomezzz @riksaes @iheartjayke @jinnibug @kookify @roastandtoast @fakeuwus  @junityy  @ak-aaa-li @letwiiparkjay @kashuannn @floweryang @bywons @dimplewonie @ginakam @hearts4itoshi @nctislifue @chaeyunloveeee (if ur name is bold that means i unfortunately couldn’t tag u TT)
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greatunironic · 10 months ago
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eddie wakes up in a strange room. this was not particularly unusual for him, historically: he’d spent most of his twenties waking up in new and interesting places (including a handful of jail cells). but after eddie, the label, and the los angeles superior court system decided it would be best if he stopped drinking and doing blow, it stopped being such a regular occurrence.
so it’s almost alarming to him, now, to be blinking up at an unfamiliar cement ceiling with the raging bitch of all headaches and generally feeling like he got hit by a truck, got whiplash in a crash with the way his neck aches. he’d think he was hungover like all those times before except for how sharp the pain is, bright.
he worries, briefly, he’s relapsed, or someone’s slipped him something. but he remembers what him and the boys had been up to, before this, and he thinks it’d’ve been a strange night indeed if someone roofied a c-list (b-list if he’s feeling charitable) musician at a fucking frozen four game.
because yeah, eddie remembers: they’d been third row, watching the wisconsin ladies clean up and cheering for jeff’s kid sister like she was about to get olympic gold. (she probably would, someday. her and that mayfield girl who played defense were looking down the barrel at a 2026 run apparently.
eddie’s been to a handful of games over the years, when touring and recording allows them to go. he’s resolutely never been a sports guy but he’ll admit, when pressed, that live hockey is pretty dope. to say nothing, of course, of how jeff would probably murder them all in their sleep if they didn’t rep the red and white for lottie.
(and also — and this is between eddie and his god alright — but lottie’s coach? standing back there in his suit, hair styled and dialed, snapping his gum, yelling at the refs? kind of doing it for him, okay. worth the price of admission, even if the tickets weren’t free.)
when he thinks harder — which hurts too — the last thing he clearly remembers was someone from the beavers scoring, bringing their lead to 5-1, and a slapshot from the other team getting out over the boards and nearly taking out some lady’s popcorn. someone behind them in the seats said, “jesus they’re getting desperate, eh?”
then shit goes dark on him, not even a fade to black, but a full on smash cut, roll credits black, and the post-credits scene is where ever the fuck eddie is at the moment. it smells like human and cold and icy hot, so obviously, he thinks, he died and went to hell like all the church ladies said he would back in hawkins, or probably just a locker room. what the fuck?
he blinks at the ceiling, at an interesting water stain on the cement texturing. he’s in the middle of wondering where the rest of his band has gone if he’s here alone, fucking abandoners, when a sweaty redhead with the bitchiest expression he’s maybe ever seen enters his field of vision.
“you’re alive,” she says.
eddie blinks again. “why do you sound so disappointed?”
“yo coach!” she shouts, already on the move away from him. “he’s alive!”
he tries to sit up, but that makes the pain in his head worse, and also draws attention to the fact that his back also hurts. he squeezes his eyes shut and makes a truly embarrassing noise of pain — if pressed, he’d call it a whimper — and a pair of big hands land on his shoulders.
“out, out ladies i got this! hey!, hey, man, don’t move just yet,” says big hands.
“yeah, no problem, i don’t want to anymore,” eddie says. he stirs up the will to open his eyes again and very nearly slams them back shut. because of course the person staring down at him is fucking coach hottie snackycakes himself. he’s even better looking in person, too, big droopy eyes, lips as pink as his bubblegum, and shiny, jesus christ. he’s still got eddie by the shoulders, hands warm through the thin cotton of his flannel and tee — because eddie’s always been more fashion than sense, wayne always said, and it’s even worse now that the paps are on him—
“oh, fuck this is gonna be all over tiktok later, isn’t it?” he moans.
“maybe not.”
“don’t lie.”
“listen, eddie — it is eddie, right?” asks coach hottie. “i’m steve. coach harrington. faughnsie — lottie, i mean — she said you’re eddie. her brother’s guitarist? what do you remember?”
“more like he’s my singer,” he says, “but sure. and not much.”
“well, you’re gonna be okay,” says coach hottie — steve. “it really wasn’t that bad, and it was probably too fast for anyone to get it, unless they already had a camera on you. you took a puck to the head when one popped up. i’d apologize but it wasn’t one of my girls who did it, so. anyway — you weren’t out for long, which robbie says is good — she’ll get a look at you in a second — but you got your bell rung pretty good. and you’re gonna have quite the shiner, trust me.”
“speaking from experience?”
“oh, yeah. closer and faster too.” he gently raps his head with his knuckles. “too many concussions too early ended my nhl days, in fact.”
“oh. oh shit, sorry, i—“
“don’t worry about it, man, it happens,” he says. “and if it hadn’t, i wouldn’t be here.”
“at the frozen four.”
“yeah, sure, that too.”
“what?”
“what?” steve waves him off. “anyway, i’m just glad to see you up, ish, and talking. looked pretty scary, from the bench.”
“i really don’t remember,” says eddie. “but i’m sure i’ll see it on tiktok later, like i said — at least, my unconscious, bleeding form.”
“i got up there pretty fast, so i doubt it,” says steve.
eddie blinks, twice. “you—?”
“you were behind my bench, and you. well,” he says with a shrug, but he’s clearly a little embarrassed, finally putting those hands away — weapons of eddie destruction, he thinks — and shoving them into his pockets of his tight slacks. “i should be getting back out there.”
“do you? you’re murdering them pretty good, unless i black out and missed them getting four more goals,” eddie says.
the corners of steve’s eyes crinkle when he smiles. eddie thinks he might just pass out again. “no, we’re still gonna cinch it, i think. looks bad, though — first time coach missing the final period so’s he can hit on the cute musician who got his clock cleaned by the biscuit.”
“oh,” he says. swallows. “uh.”
steve’s crinkly, smiley eyes go wide. “unless—“
“no less!” eddie shouts and then immediately winces. at a better, less damaging to his more than slightly concussed noggin, volume, he says, “more, actually. because pretty sure i shouldn’t be left unsupervised, and i’ve clearly been abandoned by the band, so—“
“so,” says steve.
“coach, two minutes!” someone calls.
“so, i was hoping maybe i could keep hitting on the hot hockey coach back at his?”
“i’m at the ramada inn,” he says, “and i got tape to watch for the finals.”
“i live for room service,” eddie tells him seriously. “and i’m suddenly very into wisconsin sports teams.”
“coach! go time!”
“yeah?” he asks.
“yeah.”
“COACH!”
he jerks a thumb over his shoulder. “i gotta — but, uh, later?”
“pick me up in twenty?”
“probably more like half an hour, with stoppage,” he says.
someone bangs on the door. “COACH!! let’s boogie!!”
with one last look, wide eyed and smiling, steve leaves. eddie watches him go. he’d heard hockey players were caked up but lord — eddie is about to convert to a new religion, or maybe found one, over the stretch of those slacks.
“damn,” he says quietly.
“gross,” a woman says. eddie startles and looks to the side, where a lanky brunette with a bob and an undercut is staring at him, unimpressed. she’s in some get up that screams athletic trainer, and there’s a white board in her hand.
“how long have you been there?” he asks.
she raises an eyebrow. “long enough, and honestly, i don’t know if that counts as a you rule for him, or a you suck for you,” she says and does not elaborate when he asks. “also don’t look at him like that. it’s steve. he’s basically my sister.”
“yeah? any tips then?” asks eddie. “i promise i’ll only use them for good. well. mostly.”
“god,” she says with an expansive eye roll. “you’re gonna be a nightmare, aren’t you?”
a cheer goes up outside the room as the teams, presumably, take the ice again. eddie, head throbbing, concussed, embarrassed, grins. “sure hope so,” he says.
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gothamite-rambler · 2 months ago
Text
The Wayne boys most days without sleep before they finally crashed (two manage to beat out Batman)
Tim Drake - 12 days
Tim fidgeted with his hands, his gaze fixed on the wall.
Tim: All around the mulberry bush, the monkey chased the weasel, da da da da—
Suddenly, an alarm blared on his phone startling everyone at the cafe table he was sitting at.
Tim: POP GOES THE WEASEL!
He erupted into cackling laughter, but as he slowly laid his head on the table, the laughter quickly faded away. Cassie, Kon, and Bernard exchanged worried glances.
Cassie: Hey, Tim, how long have you been awake?
Tim (rocking back and forth): 288 hours.
Cassie (stunned): 200 and what?
Kon (shocked): You've been awake for 12 days?!
Bernard (sighing): Again, Tim?
Cassie & Kon: Again?!
Bernard: I've seen this happen with him so many times. At this point, his brain starts to cry.
Cassie: Don’t you mean die?
Tim sobbed for a few moments, his eyes fixed on his phone, before falling completely silent.
Bernard: Nah, I mean crying.
Tim: You've seen me do it before, and I can do it longer. The first record holder lasted 12 days! I can go even longer—like a full month! I can! Batman couldn't even do that!
Tim cackled rocking back and forth.
Tim: Coffee helps especially when you replace it with all other liquids.
Tim grabbed a large cup of coffee, his hands trembling uncontrollably. He took a few big gulps as Cassie looked on in shock, while Konnor blinked and then shrugged, taking a few sips from his tea. Bernard gently rubbed his boyfriend’s back.
Cassie: Dude, why are you even avoiding sleep?
Bernard (explaining for his boyfriend): The double life, regular paperwork and then hero work. Timmy, let's take you home okay?
Tim: Home, no home. I fall sleep. Sleep for the weak... Did you know if you look at the walls long enough, new people appear?
Tim waved, laughing nervously then tensed horrified.
Tim: Their faces are contorting again!
Bernard: Let's take you away from the scary... invisible person and get you home to not rest.
Bernard took Tim's hand and led him outside of the Dunkin' Donuts.
Cassie: I could not handle dating a batkid.
Konnor nodded.
Kon: I dated him for a while. Would not recommend.
----------------------------------------------------
Dick Grayson - 18 days and 15 minutes
Kori and Beast Boy walked into the Titans' living room. Raven was the only one there, deep in her daily meditation.
Kori: Where's Dick at?
Raven: Outside counting blades of grass.
Kori (confused): Counting blades of grass?
Beast Boy (frustrated): Oh Jesus, has he been awake for days again?
Raven nodded, her eyes still closed.
Raven (monotone): He'll crash any second, but he thought being outside in the sun would 'revitalize' him.
Beast Boy: That's not- I'll be back.
Beast Boy went outside where Dick was, indeed, counting blades of grass. BB approached him, tapping his foot. Dick looked up, his eyes wide and one twitching.
Dick: Hey- Hey- Hey buddy. Did you know we have one hundred thousand blades of grass? I- Did you change colors?
BB: What color do you think I am?
Dick squinted his eyes.
Dick: Blue.
BB: All right, we're on that color. How long have you been awake, buddy?
Dick: I stopped sleeping last Wednesday... Then a week passed... Then another, that was 14, now it's Saturday of the second week. And- I hear the world singing.
Dick lay on the ground, counting the same patch of grass as he whispered incoherent nonsense. Beast Boy crossed his arms, sighed, and walked back inside the tower.
BB: 18 days this time.
Beast Boy walked away as Kori covered her mouth in shock.
Raven: He's surpassing the world record holder. Also, his brain might be dying.
Kori (alarmed): Might be?!
Raven: He's a batkid, their brains are made of steel or something.
Kori: I have one trick that usually knocks him out—
Raven: I know it's sex.
Kori (giggling): Yes, but he falls asleep on top of me every time.
Raven sighed, shaking her head while Beast Boy left the house with a water bottle.
Beast Boy: Right, I'm going to give him this sleep juice Alfred sent us. He says it knocks them out in a few seconds.
Raven: Smart choice.
Beast Boy: Thanks.
----------------------------------------------------
Jason Todd - 5 days
Jason: I can't sleep.
Roy: How long have you been awake?
Jason (groggy): About five days. Man, I tried to go to sleep, but my body physically won't let me.
Roy: Well, you have been drinking Red Bulls every other hour. You're too focused on the mission. Just go to sleep.
Jason shook his head, rocking back and forth.
Jason: Can't sleep… Won't sleep… No sleep.
Roy tapped his foot, thinking of a way to get him to sleep, then smiled.
Roy: You know you're becoming just like your dad. That's good; he can go six days without sleep. Maybe you'll—
Jason stood up, went to another room, closed his door, and fell into his bed to sleep.
Roy: Works every time.
----------------------------------------------------
Damian - 1 day
Damian: I don't want to go to sleep! No!
Damian kicked his feet as Bruce dragged him to bed.
Bruce: Nope, you’ve stayed awake for 24 hours. That's it. Go to bed!
Damian: You're so unfair!
Bruce: You're not depriving yourself of valuable sleep—Alfred, shut up!
Alfred, who was reading a book about sleep disorders, smirked and then walked away.
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rockingbytheseaside · 8 months ago
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I just read 'a boy named heretic' and it was really great cuz I can see little zandik being obsessed of his favourite researchers. And Imagine after creating his segments, little segments being so obsessed with you that they start their days with reading your researchs or treating your researchs like a religious book maybe even the older segments still do that. they would have memorised everything by now and that would be so funny like little segments make a mistake when they are talking about your researchs and older ones go like 'no no it goes like this and this' I can definitely see that happening.
Thank you for reading my brainrot over your fic and even though i just discovered you I love your writing style and your art is amazing so thank you for blessing us
Thank you so much! I try to write fics and tropes because I also struggle with Harbinger brainrot. Sometimes I draw and sometimes I gotta write. So I hope I won't disappoint with this one (。•́︿•̀。)
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✦ You learn that Dottore taught his little segment about your old research too
(tw: none, pure fluff)
In the days of old, a young boy named Zandik was infatuated by you.
You were there, in the photos of the Akademiya’s best, A brilliant alumna. Meanwhile, he was still a mere student, looking up at you with eager ruby eyes. The distance between you two, not just in seniority, but in intellect and knowledge looked like an insurmountable ocean for little Zandik. 
He read all your published works, theses, or even miscellaneous essays. You were one of the few who dared to explore risque topics, often researching the fallen technology of your homeland, Khaenri’ah. Your works became his mantra, as the young trainee Dastur frequently stayed at night reading and memorizing your written words. 
How he longed to stand by your side. To bask in the glow of your wisdom, and hopefully, one day stand beside you in these photos of The Akademiya’s best. The thought of being your equal on that wall is a fantasy that once consumed him during many sleepless nights. 
But alas, his name was not in the records beside you. Instead, it was in the records of exiled students. 
The expulsion was a bitter pill to swallow for Zandik, yet it became a blessing in disguise. It allowed him to break free from the constraints of the Akademiya and truly delve into the depths of his research; to walk where you walked. With this liberating and newfound freedom, The Fatui heightened his abilities. They provided him with the resources and tools, and in return, he shared the fruits of his labor with them. But the Fatui were not the focus of his pursuits - you were. 
The little boy who once admired you from afar is no more. Now, a Fatui Harbinger stood before you, a man who has grown and shaped himself in your shadow. So here you were, in Dottore’s lab quietly musing. That was the story of your unceremonious reunion with The Doctor, whom you didn’t even know was after you. However, you didn’t mind it. You even met one of his many segments. 
What you didn’t expect is… a little child in his lab. 
A boy, looking awfully similar to little Zandik, no older than 8 years old. He gawked back at you, with his ruby-red eyes and you felt a sense of deja vu. You kneeled in front of him, catching a glimpse of a book in the child’s arms: 
“Um, hello, little one. What is that book you’re reading?”
The child cast his gaze to the floor timidly, revealing the worn-out book he was concealing behind his back. He held it tightly with his little hands, speaking in a small but avid voice:
“It’s your work… Your name is right here!” 
You blinked in surprise. It indeed had your name on it. The title was one of your research papers that you honestly forgot about. But what was even more surprising is why would an 8-year-old child read some old academic papers. 
“Oh, it is? But isn’t it a little… boring or difficult for you to read?” 
“No, I love it! I can even recite it if you want!” 
When Prime Dottore entered and spotted you talking to the eager younger clone he smirked. It seems you finally met his youngest segment, and your bafflement was expected. 
Dottore assured you that his segments, especially the younger Zandik, cannot contain their excitement at the mere mention of your name. They speak of you with a reverence that borders on idolatry, and they often ask Dottore about any copies of your published studies. 
It seems even the segments have inherited his admiration for you.
And the youngest segment, the 8-year-old child? They are absolutely enamored with your work. Every day, they ask about you and patiently anticipate any new information about your next visit to the lab. They even have a small collection of your books on their shelf, reading them diligently and trying to understand the complexity of your ideas. It was a bewildering sight, but the youngest segment enjoyed your academic essays as his bedtime stories.
“Dottore, listen. Did you make this boy memorize my thesis instead of reading fairy tales or something? Isn’t this a little… complicated for a child?” - you asked, picking up the little segment into your arms. 
“Nonsense my dear. Instead of fairy tales and nursery rhymes, a prodigy must start early by instilling a desire for knowledge. You can test it for yourself.” - Dottore explained, turning to the young child - “Recite the passage about energy infusion, paragraph 2.” 
“Okay! Ahem… ‘In the realm of Khaenri'ahn technology, we find a profound example of the interconnectedness between opposites. The use of advanced energy systems combines the power of light and electricity and as according to the data numbers of…”
Oh boy. These are big words for an 8-year-old. You don’t even remember the exact words of your 400-year-old thesis; that thing is ancient! You didn’t have the heart to tell them both that this thesis was written during an all-nighter rush. You did not feel nostalgic remembering your stress over deadlines. 
“Little one?” - You smiled at the boy in your arms and pointed at Dottore “Promise you won’t grow up like this big meanie here. He's annoying” 
“Heehee, okay!” - The tiny Zandik gently hugged your neck. The clone's innocent presence contrasts starkly with Il Dottore's imposing frown. What you failed to notice, however, was the young segment sticking his tongue out at Dottore's jealousy while you hugged the child unawarely. 
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golden-cherry · 4 months ago
Text
deal - cl16 (38/?)
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader
Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.
Chapter Summary: Merry Christmas - *narrator voice* and there was only one bed.
Warnings: fluff, mentions of sex
Word Count: 3.2k
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A/N: HE WON IN MONACO - HE WINS IN MONZA. CHARLES LECLERC IS THE WINNER OF THE 2024 ITALIAN GRAND PRIX!!!
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You purse your lips. “Bed - singular. Indeed.”
Charles and you stand in the doorway of his room. On the left wall next to a chest of drawers is a door that leads into a small bathroom, while on the right wall is a double bed, freshly made up. Several pillows are neatly arranged at the headboard, the bedside tables have been dusted and the room generally looks very tidy and well-kept. At the foot of the bed are your bags, which Pascale has just put there. Your bags - because you have to share the bed tonight.
“Yep,” replies Charles, who is standing behind you. 
You nod slightly before entering the room and sitting on the edge of the bed. “What makes your mom think we're sharing a bed?” 
Your roommate shrugs. “Do you remember the first morning in our apartment? When mom surprised us and invited us over for dinner?” He raises one of his arms, puts his hand on the upper door frame and leans against it. 
You nod. “I remember.”
“And do you also remember Maman saying that, as my new girlfriend, you get to choose what's for dinner?” When you look at him with wide eyes, he purses his lips into a thin line. "I'm afraid we never set the record straight. Not even when Arthur called you my girlfriend.”
He's right. There have been several opportunities to clear this up. Charles could have called his mother or spoken to her at dinner. And you could have cleared things up too - but neither of you actually did. 
You push the thought that you didn't clear it up because you inwardly wish that you were actually Charles' girlfriend to the back of your mind. 
“Shouldn't we tell her?” you ask hesitantly. “After all, we're lying to your family.”
Charles shrugs his shoulders. “We certainly should,” he replies, but he doesn't sound convincing. “But not today. Not at Christmas. Maman loves you so much that I don't want to do this to her at Christmas. If that's all right with you.”
Pretending you two are a happy couple is certainly the last thing you should do - after all, being affectionate in such close quarters isn't particularly conducive to keeping your feelings in check. But you have no choice - after all, you don't want to spoil Pascale's Christmas. 
“I'll sleep on the floor,” Charles snaps you out of your thoughts and points to the space between the foot of the bed and the dresser facing the bed. “I'll just take a few pillows off the bed and one of the thick blankets from the wardrobe and that should be enough for one night.”
You shake your head. “Absolutely not. You're going to training camp soon and you certainly can't go there with back pain,” you remind him, planning his days ahead. “I think Andrea would kill you if you didn't show up in top shape.”
The Monegasque sighs. “And how are we supposed to handle this?” 
The look on his face is the same as when you were standing opposite each other in the living room. When he said that he didn't want you to feel uncomfortable around him. When he suggested you go back to being friends. 
You miss him so much that it hurts. You'd love to get up and wrap your arms around him and never let go, but that's where the problem lies. His “mon ami” draws a clear line between what you want and what he wants. And you have to accept that, even if it breaks your heart. 
But that doesn't mean he has to pull his back out just because he thinks his closeness makes you uncomfortable. 
“We could share the bed,” you suggest as nonchalantly as possible. When he gives you a puzzled look, you shrug. “It's only for one night. And the bed is big enough for both of us. Then nobody has to sleep on the floor and Andrea won't kill you because you're going to camp with back pain.”
Charles raises his eyebrows. “Are you sure?” He takes his hand off the doorframe and walks towards you to sit on the edge of the bed next to you. “I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. I really don't mind sleeping on the floor.”
You smile at him. “It's okay,” you reply, "we're adults. We can share a bed quite reasonably. And it's only for one night. We should be able to manage that.” You look down at your hands in your lap before looking your roommate in the eye again. “I would have rather expected that we'd still have to sleep in separate rooms, even though your mom thinks we're a couple.”
Charles leans backwards, propping himself up on the bed with his elbows. “Why is that?” 
“Well - some moms don't like their sons' girlfriends because they're afraid they'll take them away from them. Their little boy.” You can't suppress a grin. “And I don't think many would want their little boy to share a bed with their girlfriend either - even if they're all grown up.”
“That would imply that my maman can't stand you,” he replies and tilts his head back. As he swallows, his Adam's apple bounces up and down. “Besides, even if we were really together, I wouldn't have sex with you in my maman's house. I have that much decency - for now,” he grins and looks at you again. “And she knows that too. That's why she allows us to share a bed.”
As he talks about sex with you, heat shoots up your face and your hands get sweaty. Hopefully he doesn't notice you wiping them on your dress. “I like your mom,” you deflect from the topic. 
“She likes you too,” he replies and sits up straight again. “Then let's not keep her and the others waiting any longer. After all, Christmas is a family holiday." He slowly gets up from the bed and turns to face you as he stands in the doorway. “Let's go, mon ami. Otherwise we'll get into trouble because she'll think we're getting it on like two teenagers who can't keep their hands off each other."
Thank God he leaves the room so that you can wave your hand in your face. His words make your pulse quicken so that you can almost hear your heart beating in your ears. Images appear in your head of his hands gliding over your body and his lips kissing your neck. 
Before your thoughts take over, you jump up from the bed and smooth down your dress to follow your roommate back downstairs, where the rest of the family is already waiting for you. You enter the living room, where the youngest Leclerc puts his arm around your shoulder. 
“Listen, when we play Monopoly later, the others will insist that you take the bank,” Arthur whispers in your ear. “If you'd be kind enough to slip me more money than I'm entitled from time to time, then -”
“Arthur! Are you trying to bribe my girl?” Charles calls over to you from the kitchen. The 'my girl' makes your knees go weak. 
“I would never do that,” Arthur tries to defend himself and pulls you a little closer to him. “I'm just talking about how nice it is that your girlfriend is spending Christmas with us.”
“You're a bad liar,” Charles grins, leaning against the worktop. “Besides - do you really think she should help you cheat if I'm playing as well?”
“No one cheats at Monopoly here, otherwise I'll throw the game away and we'll never play it again,” Pascale interjects. “I don't want my sons to get nasty again just because they can't behave in a board game.” She joins her middle child in the kitchen to take two bottles of wine from the fridge and put them in his hand. 
“Hey!” Arthur lets his arm slide off your shoulder to embrace his mom. He rests his cheek against the top of her head. “You're acting like we're cavemen.”
Pascale rolls her eyes. “Then don't act like one just because you can't keep it together in a board game. Now set the table, dinner will be ready soon.”
Together, you place plates and cutlery on the dining table as Enzo and Charlotte join you. The young woman hugs you tightly, while the eldest of the Leclerc brothers waves hello.
“It's nice to see you again,” she smiles and hugs you tightly. “You'll be the bank later - and my partner in crime, yes?” she whispers, before letting you go again. 
Charles laughs out loud. “I heard that, Charlotte,” he warns her with a grin and stands next to you. “I think it's funny that you all think she'd associate with you when she's my girl.”
Charlotte winks at you. “It was worth a try.”
As you all sit together at the table and eat, you look around the room. There are Christmas decorations everywhere that weren't there a few days ago. There's even a Christmas tree in the living room, but there are no presents underneath it. When Pascale notices your gaze, she smiles at you and puts her hand on yours. 
“We don't give each other presents at Christmas anymore,” she says, looking around. “Since -” Charles clears his throat as she swallows hard. 
“After my father died, we decided that there would be no more presents at Christmas because family is the greatest gift you can get,” he explains, pursing his lips. “Dad always gave the best presents and when he was gone, it was different for us.”
You smile at him before squeezing Pascale's hand. “Thank you for letting me be here. It really means a lot to me.”
“You're always welcome here,” she replies. “I'm glad Charles met you. You can almost see how good you are for him and how much he loves you.”
“Maman.” Charles rolls his eyes and a blush shoots into his cheeks. “This is totally embarrassing.”
“I'm just telling it like it is,” she smiles, leaning over to whisper something in your ear while the others continue to talk. “But don't you dare help him with Monopoly later. After all, I invited you here and cooked the meal. I guess I deserve a few extra bucks,” she winks, before turning her attention back to the others' conversation. 
You look at Charles, who smiles at you expectantly. “Everything all right?” he asks you. His hand, which is resting on his leg, twitches as if he wants to reach for yours. 
You look around for a moment, watching the family members interacting lovingly and celebrating Christmas together, before turning back to him. “It couldn't be better.”
-
“You're taking the piss,” Arthur complains, jumping up from his chair with such a jerk that it tips backwards. “You'll never have enough money to buy the fourth station from Charlotte!”
You raise an eyebrow and hand Charlotte the banknotes as she slides the playing card over to you. "Do you really think I'd cheat on you guys? This is my first time playing with you!”
Pascale shakes her head. “Think about it, Arthur. She's simply done well. Look at how many streets - “ she starts to defend you, but falls silent before looking at you with her head tilted back. “Where did you get the money to afford so many streets?”
“Maman!” Charles interjects. “You can't just accuse my girlfriend of stealing money from the bank just because you're losing. That's not nice. Especially not at Christmas.”
Enzo rolls his eyes. “You're only saying that because she's your girlfriend. Love has made you blind, little brother.”
Charles smiles lovingly at you. “I guess it has. But that's okay. I don't mind losing to you.”
You return his smile sweetly. “That's good,” you reply and take a look at the pitch. “Because I've won.”
The Leclercs stare at the table, puzzled and amazed, as if you've shown them a magic trick. But really - there's no way they could beat you now. 
Charlotte laughs. “I didn't even know you could actually win Monopoly. I thought it was a myth.”
Enzo takes a sip of his wine and nods at her. “You usually stop the game after three hours because you either don't feel like playing anymore or someone knocks over the board.”
“And it's usually you,” laughs Pascale and gets up from the table. “Very well. I declare the evening over for me. I'll see you in the morning,” she smiles at you before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “I'm very glad you're here.”
“Me too,” you smile at her and look after her as she leaves the room. 
The five of you tidy up the room and put everything neatly away in the cupboards before you say goodbye to each other as well. In the bathroom of your room, Charles and you get ready for bed and change into your sleeping clothes before standing in front of the bed that you have to share. 
“Is it really okay for you if I sleep in the bed too?” Charles asks uncertainly as you sit down on the bed and slip under the covers. 
“I wouldn't have offered if it wasn't,” you smile, patting his side of the bed. “We're both adults. And as long as it's okay for you, it's okay for me.”
Charles nods and scratches the back of his neck. “I really wouldn't mind sleeping on the floor.”
“I do.”
He can't say anything in reply. He slowly walks around the bed and slips under the covers as well. He turns off the light and lies down on his back. 
The silence between you is strange and the physical distance doesn't make it any better. You can feel Charles' body heat through your shirt and shorts and it almost feels like the last few days haven't happened. You'd love to snuggle up to him and fall asleep by his side. 
“Be honest,” Charles breaks the silence. “Did you steal money from the bank in Monopoly?”
You giggle briefly. “I did.”
Your roommate's laughter booms through the room. “I knew it! Oh my God!” You feel him turn to his side. “Welcome to the family. You're a real Leclerc now!” he laughs, barely able to contain himself. 
“Psht!” you hiss at him. “Stop laughing! Otherwise you'll give me away and I'll lose my honorable Monopoly victory!”
“Honorable?” he asks and continues to snort. “You cheated!”
“And your family asked me to take money out of the bank for them so they could win,” you grin. “They're the worst family when it comes to Monopoly!”
Charles slowly gets himself under control again. “But otherwise we're a nice family, aren't we? Otherwise you wouldn't have spent Christmas with us.”
You nod, even though he can't see you. “I love your family.”
“And they love you. Especially Maman.”
You turn on your side too, in his direction. Apparently you're closer together than you expected, because you can feel his breath on your face. 
“Is everything okay?” Charles asks quietly. “I mean - I don't want you to feel uncomfortable around me. I - I can still sleep on the floor if you want.”
“Charles,” you exhale, but before you can say anything, he continues speaking. 
“I meant what I said to you on the boat. I can't be without you anymore and I'll do everything I can to make sure you don't turn your back on me. Nothing in this world is as important to me as you.” He takes a deep breath and exhales. “I can't describe it. You're my best friend - but so much more.”
As he moves, you feel the blanket slip over your body. You want to reach for his hand, to reassure him that you will never turn your back on him, but the words stick in your throat. Not because they're not true, but because they don't cover the whole truth that's inside you. 
You love him. With every fiber of your being. 
“You're the person I think of first thing in the morning. The person I look forward to the most when I get home. When you're with me, it's - I don't know - like we're permanently out on the open sea and the sun is shining down on us,” he confesses, without even thinking about what that might do to you. 
“And I can't stop thinking about how you felt. How warm your skin is, how soft you feel under my hands. How the heat spreads through me when you touch me. It's like touching the sun and burning myself - but I can't stop thinking about how good it feels. You're my best friend,” he breathes out. “But fuck - if I said I didn't actually crave you, that would be an outright lie.”
You can feel the arousal gathering in your shorts, goosebumps spreading across your skin and heat rising in your face. When Charles suddenly moves and turns on the little light on the bedside table, you look at him. 
“I can't share the bed with you if - if you -” he stammers, before taking a deep breath to sort out his thoughts. The comforter that was covering you a moment ago has slipped so far down due to his movements that it's below his hips - revealing his shorts and the bulge underneath. 
“Charles,” you breathe, but you don't know how to answer him without telling him directly that you love him. You have to pull yourself together. 
“I can't just lie next to you because it's tearing me up inside that I can't touch you, because I make you feel so uncomfortable that you don't want to share a bed with me in our apartment anymore.” His voice trembles, as does his hand, which is resting on his thigh. 
You don't know what makes you do it, but apparently your brain goes blank and throws all doubts overboard as you lean over to him. His eyes are glued to you as you carefully place your hand on his and your fingertips touch the soft skin of his thigh. A lightning bolt twitches through your veins at the touch - nothing has ever felt as good as he does at this moment. “I never said I was uncomfortable, Charles.” You shake your head slightly. “Quite the opposite.”
Charles looks into your eyes, trying to see anything in them, hesitation or uncertainty, but the only thing he sees is warmth and a longing he knows all too well. 
He squeezes your hand twice, and when you return his squeeze and squeeze his hand twice too - he snaps.
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